We Met the Team

by Zaku Pony

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Adventure, Crossover, Dark
Length: 35186

The mercenaries of the RED team are hired as bodyguards to the Elements of Harmony. Hats will be traded, shots fired, villains traumatized, and Jarate thrown.

After the debacle of losing Mann Co. to Gray Mann, the members of the RED team are rehired under the direct employment of Team Fortress Industries. Their first mission back together as a team will have them heading to a dimension right out of Pyroland: the Kingdom of Equestria. The mission? Guard the Elements of Harmony from everything that comes their way. The reward? A magic formula to create synthetic austrailium.

Prepare yourself, because the mission begins in thirty seconds…

(Rated teen for cursing, gore, and immature shenanigans.)

Note: this story is undergoing revision after receiving feedback from multiple proofreaders about stylistic and mechanical errors. Chapter 8 is the last update for now. New chapters will be posted only after the existing ones are "fixed."

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-08-06 22:02:26 UTC

Chapter 1: Find a Server

For Saxton Hale, Austrailian CEO of Mann Co., the early morning breakfast steak was the most important steak of the day. Plummeting downward toward the earth at speeds close to terminal velocity, the Australian super man could already taste it waiting for him. There was nothing quite like a meal consumed after a death-defying fall through the air, broken only through smashing right through the skylights of your own office, and landing right into your own executive office chair.

In other words, a normal Monday morning for Saxton Hale.

SMASH!

Before the shards of glass from his broken skylight could even bounce off of the floor, Hale had the phone on his desk in his hand with his breakfast steak in the other. He then pressed the intercom button dramatically, taking a bite out of his breakfast as well.

"Reddy! Bidwell! Meet me outside of my office! We have a business proposition to discuss!"

Hale pressed the intercom button again, shutting it off. He then slammed his hand down on his desk with a mighty thump, propelling himself over and toward the double doors that lead out of his office. Walking out of his office with brave steps, both his butlers who doubled Mann Co's sales managers were at his sides.

"You called for us, sir?" Bidwell asked, keeping a brisk pace with the Mann who waited for no one.

"Yes!" Hale shouted, reaching into his pants pockets with his free hand. He whipped out a pristine white letter with a red lace trim, now soaked in sweat from being so close to Hale during his morning exercises. "Do you see what this is!"

"A letter, sir?" Reddy questioned, keeping pace with Bidwell on Hale's other side.

"Not just any letter, boys." Hale flashed a mighty smile. "A letter from a beautiful goddess in another dimension!"

Across from each other, Bidwell and Reddy exchanged glances. Having worked for Saxton Hale for several years, they both knew that their boss was anything but a liar. Hale himself was the closest living thing to a super-human; a man with such power, charisma, and fortitude that he could make the most masculine legends pale in comparison. Between their boss, two companies owning everything in the world, a great global conspiracy to hoard a radical transformative element called australium, dangerous weapons sales to all manners of questionable individuals, and illegals activities between action-packed adventures beyond the wildest of novel tales, there was nothing in the universe they could imagine that Saxton Hale didn't, or could not, have a hand in.

But to think that their boss had relations with gods in other worlds?

"I'm sorry sir, but I don't think I heard that right." Reddy said, puzzled. "A what?"

"You heard me right, boys." Both Bidwell and Reddy noticed that their employer was smiling from ear to ear. Something only seen after a new weapon had been developed and passed the "Mann Grade" inspection for being to both incredibly dangerous to the user and foe alike. Or after a successful week long fight against waves of angry hippies. Or after defeating a wave of rogue mercenary robots attacking a Mann Co. facility with his bare hands.

Even more so if it involved all three.

"This is a letter from a goddess in another dimension who rules over a nation of intelligent pastel colored ponies. It was magically delivered to my pants right before I hit terminal velocity this morning."

Bidwell and Reddy exchanged glances again.

"Why, I haven't heard from Celestia in over a thousand years!" Hale let out a jovial chuckle. "Their time I mean, not ours. Time flows differently, you understand. It's complicated stuff, even for me! But I wonder what she's writing to me about..."

Making a courageous entry into his second office (not riddled with broken glass), Hale vaulted over his own desk again and took the last bite out of his breakfast steak. Chewing it down gruffly, he reached out and grabbed the handkerchief Reddy held out to him to wipe his hands and face with. After that was done, he opened the top drawer to his desk and gingerly slid the pristine white envelope into it.

"So boys," Hale leaned back in his massive chair, stretching his arms behind his head. "Before I look into this adorable pony business, remind me what was on the schedule for today?"

"Just a couple of things, sir." Bidwell pulled out a small datebook from his pocket, and began to thumb through it. "You have an appointment to wrestle that great white shark on his own home turf. We've had to reschedule him twice now, so I don't think you want put him off again."

"No, of course not." Hale agreed as he stroked his mustache. "I refuse to be seen as a coward against someone who can't survive without water suspending his own weight. That just won't do. What else?"

"There's the matter of cleaning up the last few strongholds of Gray Mann, sir. The BLU team has been working on them for the last year, but there are a few factories that are being persistent."

"Of course, of course," Hale grumbled. "Those damned heaps of scrap just won't die, will they? It must be a lot easier just to build another mercenary than bring one back to life. I don't suppose if Gray goes bankrupt, that he'll run out of money to fuel those robots with?"

"We're not sure, sir." Reddy stepped forward, holding his own book with a pen ready. "Actually, we think that Gray Mann might be getting funding from companies and governments that want to become independent after Redmond and Blutarch died."

"Well that won't do either." Hale turned around in his office seat, and looked toward a large globe on his desk. The land, ocean, and everything in between on the sphere was colored in a distinct red or blue with nothing left unclaimed. "But that's a job for Helen. It's not our concern to look into who is doing what behind closed doors, got it? Mann Co. will keep supplying Team Fortress Industries with what we make best; dangerous tools with sharp edges that can also burst into flames."

"Yes sir." Both Bidwell and Reddy nodded, writing it down in their books. "Sharp edges and flammability. Right sir."

"Alright... Anything else I should know of?"

Both Bidwell and Reddy shook their heads.

"No? Alright then. I'll call you both back in here later. For now, I'd like to be alone to think."

For the third time in the same morning, Bidwell and Reddy exchanged glances. Alone to think? If the words hadn't come from Hale's own mouth, they would have never believed it. It wasn't that Saxton Hale was too much of a muscular meat-head to think, but taking the time to reflect as if he were about to ponder philosophical concepts was not something Hale ever did after morning exercises. In fact, if confronted by too much information early in the day, their boss was more likely to jump out of the window of his office to escape being weighed down by the responsibilities of his own business.

Still, they respectfully bowed to their employer before leaving his office and closing the door behind them.

Hearing and seeing them leave, all restraints Hale had put on in front of his subordinates was thrown to the wind. Like a man possessed, he tore open the drawer containing the letter, pulling it right out of its sockets and tearing the handle clear off. Not caring in the slightest and with his hands trembling, he daintily picked it up and brought it under his nose to smell.

Vanilla.

The same smell of vanilla from when he had proven his manhood to the only creature in the universe that mattered.

And Mann sweat. The envelope smelt of that too.

With a finesses gentle enough to tickle an infant, Hale peeled off the wax seal and untied the trim around the latter with one hand. Being sure not to damage anything, with the same gentle caution he unfolded the letter and began to read with baited anticipation.

"To my Beloved... Hmmm, I see," his eyes went from one side of the letter to the other, scanning the parchment in depth. His expression changed back and forth from different extremes as he continued to read. "Yes, yes... YES! Ah, hah! What!? NO! Oh? Yes. Mmm, hmm."

Hale calmly placed the letter down on his desk to be framed later.

"Bidwell! Reddy! Get in here!"

No less than a second later, the double doors to his office burst open and his two butlers walked back in. "What is it, sir? Is everything alright? What does she want?" Reddy dared to ask first, their curiosity was written all over their faces.

"Bidwell! I want you to get in contact with Helen right away!" Hale commanded, boldly standing up and vaulting back over his desk. He then began to pace back and forth in his office, with one muscular arm balled into a fist behind his back and the other with his pointer finger stabbing into the air in declaration. "I don't know what she's doing and I don't care! She needs to know about this!"

He then turned to his other assistant, with a grim determination on his face.

"Reddy, I want you to go down and get the video recorder. I'm not going to put off wrestling that great white shark on his own terms, but I want to send a video to our best RED mercenaries at the same time. I have a job for them, that only they can do!"

"The mercenaries?" Reddy shook his head. "But sir, the RED team disbanded after the defeat of Gray Mann. We don't know where any of them are."

"What?" Hale stopped, and then went back to pacing. "No, that's nonsense. Of course we know that they're doing, or at least Helen probably does. You don't train nine men to be perfect killers with different talents and then lose track of them!"

"Now get on it, and quickly! I mean it!" he snapped, watching his assistants run off with a spring in their step. "I've got to think of a way to reschedule the official company rocket jumper competition. Normally I'd never think of putting off an event everyone loves, but this is more important than that!"

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

The sun burned brightly down on the royal Canterlot gardens; another perfect afternoon over the capital of the largest and wealthiest nation in the world. It was no coincidence of course, since the weather had been planned out ahead of time as a special request by the royal sisters, and mixed perfectly by Canterlot's elite Pegasus weather team. In the morning the streets and homes of Canterlot had been cleaned and polished by an army of civil servants, with no explanation given to any of the residents. Before noon, every part of the royal gardens had been maintained to perfection, with the only explanation given was that Princess Celestia would be entertaining a very important guest in the afternoon.

Riiiiiing... Riiiiiing... Riiiiiing... Riiiiiing...

On the table between them, an ivory white telephone connected to a magic line continued to ring gently. Princess Celestia's guest placed her cup of tea down on its saucer gently with a light clink. She eyed the phone with an amused look, and looked back at her secretary who was dressed in a similar fashion to herself. Behind the Administrator, Ms. Pauling unpacked a large tape recorder in suitcase, with a line running directly to the same cord as the phone on the table.

"...How punctual. That should be from Hale now. Are you ready Miss Pauling?"

"Yes ma'am. The line is connected, and it will record everything in your conversation."

Across from her, Princess Celestia dropped a light spoonful of sugar into her own tea, before stirring it with her magic.

"Just as you predicted. You're still on top of everything after all these years, Helen."

Riiiiiing... Riiiiiing... Riiiiiing... Riiiiiing...

"Don't patronize me, Celestia." Her tone was cold, but not bitter. "We still haven't talked about my payment in return for my mercenaries."

"Yes, we should get to that." Celestia agreed. "But first..." She motioned to the phone that continued to ring between them.

The Administrator furrowed her brows, before letting out a sigh of admittance. She promptly snuffed her cigarette out into the ashtray between them, with a bitter and unfeminine grunt.

"I suppose you're right. It's rude to keep a barking dog waiting. Shall we begin, Miss Pauling?"

"Yes ma'am. Whenever you're ready."

As the Administrator began to talk, Celestia tuned her out and began to focus on some of the files that lay between them. As she had expected, Helen had come with everything organized perfectly in response to her offer. In the time that had passed, Saxton Hale had inherited the family fortune from his father Bilious Hale, which included an organization called Mann Co. Through previous connections to Zepheniah Mann, Mann Co. had become the primary sponsor of an inheritance war through their subsidiary of Team Fortress Industries. Both descendants of Zepheniah, Redmond Mann and Blutarch Mann, had amassed fortunes and power before deciding to fight each other for the opposing siblings inheritance of Zepheniah Mann's original fortune. As strange as it was to imagine, peace and stability in most of the world had been achieved by using both brother's violent quarrel as a front to channel the rest of the world's disputes.

Through the careful manipulation of business decisions by Team Fortress Industries, Redmond and Blutarch had spend their entire lives focusing on nothing but reclaiming a dream about the past that no longer existed. Celestia had read the transcripts of routine meetings with the Mann brothers, and for some reason both Redmond and Blutarch had an obsession with gravel. But that had ended with an unexpected return of Gray Mann, the long lost brother to both Redmond and Blutarch who had been kidnapped at birth. Gray Mann had also come with an army of robots (which ran on money), with the goal of stealing Mann Co's property which held a very dangerous secret from the rest of the world.

According to Helen's paperwork, if it were to be trusted, both the mercenary teams under Redmond and Blutarch had been reorganized by Mann Co. to attack Gray Mann's facilities while defending Mann Co. ones. For the last year a war had been waged over two hundred different Mann Co. facility sites. Only recently Gray Mann had begun to run out of money in his fortune to fuel his robots with, and had actually resorted to trying to sell hats similar to the very ones Mann Co. had made their fortune on. Fortunately or unfortunately, the RED team in particular had been very good at their job, and Mann Co. was seeking new fields of employment for them now that Gray Mann had run out of robots to attack Mann Co. with.

The timing of Princess Celestia's request couldn't have been better.

So much so, that Celestia found herself wondering if there were spies in her own country.

"Are you sure these men are...fit to protect my little ponies?"

Still on the phone, Helen motioned for her assistant behind her to step forward. Noting the expression on her boss's face, Miss Pauling adjusted her glasses and pulled up a seat next to the Administrator at their table.

"If by 'protect' you mean utterly destroy anything and everything that looks at them funny," Miss Pauling smiled, "Then yes, your majesty. Absolutely. Without a doubt."

"Miss Pauling, is it?" Celestia questioned. "Your trust in them is assuring, but you should know that I won't accept unrestrained violence in my kingdom."

"Oh, of course your majesty," Miss Pauling began to sort through the files between them. Picking up one file from the rest, she produced three pictures with people Celestia recognized as the BLU team's Scout, Soldier, and Spy. "None of our mercenaries are immune from the law of the lands they operate in. Although we sometimes need to pull some strings, part of our contract states that our mercenaries under your employment can still be punished for breaking local laws."

"I see. But you understand how ambiguous 'pulling strings' sounds. As the buyer, I can't help but worry a little when you freely admit that you will consider...ways...around the laws of my nation."

"I apologize for my poor word choice, your majesty. What I meant to say, is that sometimes things happen by accident and people tend to think that they're solving a problem rather than creating more." Miss Pauling reached out and took a spare tea cup from the porcelain china on the table, and went to pour herself her own cup.

"I doubt that the issue will ever come up while our mercenaries are here. Honestly, your majesty."

"I would certainly hope so. Do you have a physical copy of the contract for me to go over?"

"Yes, right here, somewhere. Let me just..." Miss Pauling pulled out another folder, and thumbed through its contents. "I have it all right here. A copy for both you and your sister, if she chooses to join us later tonight."

Celestia accepted the single slip of paper, noting the plain machine typed print and stamped logos on both the bottom and top of the paper. It was so very different from the lace trimmed and embroidered artisan crafted contracts that were passed between courts in different kingdoms in her world. The paper Miss Pauling was handing her was so plain that it betrayed the importance of what was imprinted onto it, and she couldn't help but muse how many life or death situations were printed in such a cold and impersonal fashion daily.

Miss Pauling adjusted her glasses, and began to read aloud for Celestia to follow.

"Mann Co and Team Fortress Industries will lend you nine of our strongest warriors for a duration of one year, divided in any way you request. While in Equestria, the members of Reliable Excavation and Demolition will ensure the safety and well-being of the six users of the Elements of Harmony. The Element holders will be free to specify more individuals they want protected, so long as they fall underneath the categories of friends and family. The Diarchy of Equestria will provide our mercenaries with basic services, employment, and residence of satisfactory quality close to their targets. The Diarchy of Equestria will also allow Team Fortress Industries to send supplies across dimensions when requested by our mercenaries."

Miss Pauling flipped the first page of the contract around to its back, as did Celestia with her own copy.

"While in Equestria, all mercenaries hired out will be required to stay within the legal boundaries of laws set and enforced by the Diarchy of Equestria. Once the contracted period of one year (Equestrian time) has passed, all mercenaries working for Reliable Excavation and Demolition will be returned to their home dimension, sent to the past to compensate for the time differential between our two worlds. If the Diarchy of Equestria is interested in continued use of their services after this contract expires, said contract will be open for renewal and renegotiation under possible new terms. Mann Co. and Team Fortress Industries reserves the right to refuse renewal of this contract for any circumstance we deem fit."

"And last but not least..." Miss Pauling continued reading through a few lines and reached the bottom of the page. Celestia noticed a small bit of puzzlement in her face, and then noticed what the last clause of the contract read.

"After the contracted period of one year has passed, if all nine mercenaries have performed work satisfactory to the conditions listed above, payment will be made to Team Fortress Industries in the form of the recipe Star Swirl the Bearded followed to create synthetic australium."

Chapter 2: Choose a Game Mode

Princess Celestia could only stare in shock, reading the last line of her contract over again. Star Swirl the Bearded? Synthetic australium? A rush of memories threatened to break loose like a flooded dam inside of her mind, but she quickly suppressed them, mindful of her present company.

"Helen," Celestia put her hoof back down on the table, sliding her copy of the contract back to Miss Pauling in a deliberately slow manner. "You have some nerve to ask me for this. After all these years, you still--"

"What?" The Administrator looked between the phone in her hand and Celestia. She then turned to Miss Pauling, who pointed to the ending paragraph of the contract with her finger. "Ah. Still carrying emotional baggage, I see. Hale, hold on a second."

She put her hand over the transmitter. "Celestia, don't tell me you're still bitter at Star Swirl. I know it was selfish of him to make you and your sister immortal without your consent, and then die before he could join you. But, really..."

"Immortality isn't a joke!" Celestia nearly screamed, but kept her voice to the level of a harsh whisper. "You might think there are a million reasons why you would want it, but the one reason why you don't is stronger than all of them!"

Helen gave her a questioning look from across the table. "I think you misunderstand me. What--" She cut herself off, as she could hear Hale asking something and continuing to talk without her. "Look, could your emotional outburst wait? I still have your old one night fling on the phone here. I don't know what you wrote to him, but its going to take some real smooth talking to convince him not to break dimensional walls to come and see you."

Celestia found herself blushing uncomfortably at Helen's words, and fumed silently into her cup of tea. Despite the sugar she had put into it earlier, it now tasted considerably more bitter then what she was used to. Across the table, Miss Pauling fidgeted uncomfortably, now finding herself stuck between the two scariest females in the known human universe.

"Um... Excuse me," Miss Pauling said, fidgeting some more in her seat. "This tea is made without tea bags, correct?"

Celestia continued to glare at Helen who was still on the phone and couldn't be bothered to care.

"Yes, it is Miss Pauling."

"Is it Williamson and Magor? Or maybe Fortnum and Mason?" Miss Pauling took a sip of her own tea to test her guess. She smiled apologetically, seeing a look of annoyance still on Celestia's face.

"I'm sorry, it reminds me of a tea from my world. I haven't had tea that wasn't made from tea bags in a very long time."

"You're right, actually." Celestia raised an eyebrow, a little amused. "It's Williamson and Magor black tea. I had it imported for our meeting, since it is very important that my guests enjoy themselves while in my care."

"It may not seem like much, but I want to say thank you." Miss Pauling spoke quietly into her cup. "For someone like me who works almost every day of the year, this is a very nice treat. I don't remember the last time I actually had a chance to brew tea from scratch."

"Well..." Celestia let out a sigh, feeling herself calming down a little bit. "You're welcome, then."

Around her, the birds in the garden continued to sing and go about their daily rituals, having stopped only momentarily due to her outburst. Above them she could make out tiny specks in the sky moving clouds about, more than likely members of the Canterlot weather team changing out dry clouds for wet ones to keep the temperature during the height of the day down. Even though the gardens were mostly surrounded by parts of the royal castle, she could still make out the echos of activity coming from the daily hustle and bustle of Canterlot. Even if her discussion wasn't going as smoothly as she had hoped, at least it seemed that everywhere else was--

"Your majesty, may I say something...personal?"

Celestia stopped listening to the world around her, and looked at Miss Pauling. Next to her, Helen continued to jabber back and forth with Hale over the phone, partially oblivious to their conversation. Having finished her cup of tea, Miss Pauling reached out to pour herself another cup as she spoke.

"Speaking personally, I feel that the right to rule is something you earn, your majesty. It is not something you are born with. In my world, a large part of violence in human history comes from people claiming to be born with the right to rule when they have no talent for it."

After pouring herself a second cup, she reached up and removed her glasses from her face and placed them on the table.

"I don't know what happened, but if this Star Swirl did what he did because he predicted your potential... Well, looking at where both of you and your sister are now, I would say that he was right."

"That this subject a very taboo one, Miss Pauling." Celestia warned sternly, instantly regretting how she imagined herself sounding. "Since we are not very personal friends, please do not speak to me so casually about it."

"Yes, I'm sorry your majesty," Miss Pauling apologized immediately. "But I feel the need to comment on just how beautiful Equestria is."

"Beautiful...you say?"

"Yes. Beautiful. Your citizens are beautiful. The land is beautiful. The weather is beautiful. I could go on for hours, probably."

She didn't want to admit it, but the diminutive and unassuming lackey to one of the sharpest minds she had ever known was beginning to perk her interest. All this time her attention had been focused on playing a strong hand toward Helen, but it was becoming clear that the company Helen kept close was there for a reason. But over a thousand years of participating in your own political court helped sharpen your mind to anticipate anything, and so Celestia decided to calmly play along.

"And what do you mean by beautiful?" She asked, straightforward and simply. "What do you know about the history of my country?"

"I only know what I've read. That a little over a thousand years ago, this world was separated into three tribes with constant hostilities to each other. I know that they preyed on each other, manipulated each other, fought each other and played the role of the victim from each others actions. All the while other creatures and monsters in this world would prey on them as well."

Miss Pauling took a minute to spoon some sugar into her own tea, and Celestia remained silent to allow her to continue.

"You and your sister performed nothing short of a miracle, by convincing the ponies of all three tribes to look toward something greater than the present. To look past immediate gains. You gave them the dream of the future. Or rather, you gave them a method to reach tomorrow from today. Not just for themselves, but for their friends, family, and foals as well."

Celestia remained silent, as did Miss Pauling.

Celestia broke the silence first. "What if I gave it to you? What do you plan on doing with it?"

"I can only speak from an assuming standpoint." Miss Pauling glanced at her boss, who had lit another cigarette and was sucking it down in between groans at whatever Hale was saying on his end of the phone. "But we would use it to continue to politically stabilize our world."

"I have a hard time believing that a radical mutagenic transformative element can be used to stabilize anything, Miss Pauling."

"People are different from ponies, your majesty. We don't have magic. We don't have monsters. After millions of years we have climbed to the top of the food chain, and all we have to fear and distrust are ourselves. Because of that, people have become too comfortable with the prospects of natural evils running around in the world. There needs to be a controlling force, to prevent humanity from cannibalizing itself."

"That sounds very much like an explanation to justify your own existence on top of your peers. Are you saying that Team Fortress Industries acts as the guardians of humanity's future by acting as its enablers in the present?"

"As I said your majesty, humans are violent by nature. I cannot speak for the nature of ponies, but I must ask that you believe me when I say that humans are not the same. You must understand how the death of Redmond and Blutarch was unexpected and very problematic for us. Through those two, Team Fortress Industries was capable of manipulating and controlling each half of our world. Through their endless fight against each other, we were able to give humanity a placebo of violence and destruction to pacify their desires. But because both brothers are dead at the hands of another brother with no interest in working with us, their conglomerates have collapsed and begun to run amok."

Miss Pauling stopped, both to let herself take a breath and to allow Celestia to process all of what she had said.

It wasn't as if she was lying, as far as she knew. Really, it wasn't. She had gambled that if her boss's dubious pragmatism and frankness weren't appealing, than perhaps a little small talk to smooth things over would be better.

The analogy the Administrator had used a year ago in regards to the Poopy Joe incident still ran true: unfed dogs had no reason to be loyal to their master. The rapid response of the American government in the form of a congressional inquiry into Mann Co.'s activities were proof enough that everyone was out for themselves. At the smell of weakness, the strongest government in the world that only existed from Mann Co.'s support had tried to bite the hand responsible for raising and nurturing it.

It was a stark lesson to be learned for Miss Pauling, who never doubted that her boss had seen it coming.

The one hundred pounds of australium that Helen's ancestor had stolen from Terra Australis had gone far, but not nearly far enough. And it wasn't as if Team Fortress Industries could just return some day and ask for more.

The recipe for synthetic australium from Equestria would work as a leverage of power against those who wished to strike out on their own out from under Team Fortress Industry's control. A new organization would have to be created, capable of reigning in the old assets of Builders League United and Reliable Excavation and Demolition under one group.

Princess Celestia's talking interrupted Miss Pauling thoughts.

"To me, it looks as if you want me to help you secure power for yourself. Do you really think I'll do such a thing?" she asked,  with a little bite behind her words. "Assuming I believed every word you've said, don't you think it's rather proper for a non-human to make a decision affecting so many innocent lives unrelated to her?"

"I would ask the same question, your majesty, when you choose to involve yourself with economic trade with other races in this world."

Celestia thought on her words for a moment, before responding. "How so? Do tell, Miss Pauling."

"Speaking frankly, your majesty." Miss Pauling felt a gentle breeze blow between them, enough to send a gentle chill through everyone present. "We all know who really controls this world. We've done our research before came here on your invitation."

Allowing the accusation to slip past, Celestia closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. "I'm not sure of what you mean. Could you explain?"

"What did founding of Equestria establish one thousand years ago?" Miss Pauling took a sip of her tea, and poured a little more for herself. "The turning of the roles of prey and predator in this world. As it stands now, life on this planet is dependent on Equestria for energy production, food production, and economic activity itself. The fact is, every other kingdom in this world is incapable of feeding their own subjects without trade from Equestria. Ponies on the other hand, would have no trouble supporting themselves if they were to sever ties with every non-pony race on this planet."

A long moment passed, and Miss Pauling looked around out into the royal gardens. The wind blew again, with the plants in the garden rustling around them.

"If the Diarchy of Equestria were to suddenly strengthen its ties with other pony inhabited regions in this world, and boycott everything else, you would be able to create a dominant economic sphere that could exclude any undesirables. That is to say, you would be able to create a greater Equestrian co-prosperity sphere of economic security that stretched the entire planet. If all of these nations entered your economic partnership and abandoned their other ties, the nations excluded would eventually wither away with their culture and history turning into nothingness."

Celestia was slightly taken aback, and looked back at Miss Pauling with wide eyes.

"Are you accusing me of being capable of such...such... Madness?"

"Madness?" Miss Pauling looked into her cup with a tinge of sadness. "Yes, I see what you mean. For any living creature to think that they could coordinate and organize something so massive by their own, it really would be madness."

Had she hit something sensitive with her word choice? No, probably not. Celestia had put on a mock air of authority, ironically, out of reaction from not being able to think of a calm answer to the unsubtle accusation of being a tyrant. She paused for a moment to collect her thoughts before deciding to probe deeper.

"Are you saying Miss Pauling, that it is Team Fortress Industry's intention to try and create something similar to my kingdom?"

"It is as I've said before, your majesty. Ponies are not violent in nature. Humans are another matter entirely. Humans are unpredictable. Violent. Chaotic. They need a structure to adhere to, or they risk going feral and destroying themselves."

Cold and impersonal. Her words were logical and orderly, but spoken in a way that made her seem uninvolved. Distanced. As if everything being said were about some world, far far away. Celestia almost wanted to point out, with some ferocity, that both Helen and Miss Pauling were just as human as the creatures they were describing as being monsters. And even if all humans were dangerous and destructive, what did it mean to hear that coming from humans who were self-proclaimed to be above their own nature?

"It is done. Celestia, are you listening?"

Celestia frowned visibly, but quickly tried to recompose herself from having her thoughts interrupted. Across from her Helen placed the receiver of the phone back on its base, hanging up on Hale as he was still speaking about something.

"Need I remind you that this meeting was arranged by you? We came on good faith that there was a business dealing to be had, where both of us could get what we wanted over a fair and equal trade."

Celestia scoffed loudly. "You've the nerve to call me giving you the means to conquer your world a fair trade? For a little extra security?"

"Extra? Don't sell me short, Celestia. The way I see things, we're both putting our faith in each other to secure our futures."

"..."

"You want them to live to see a ripe old age, correct? Or maybe you want to groom them to be your living weapons? Either way, it doesn't matter to me. What matters is that your Element holders are safe for you to do as you please with them. The same thing can be said for the synthetic australium recipe you are going to give me."

Helen took one last puff of her cigarette, before tossing it in with the others she had sucked the life out of.

"How about I give you a week to come up with an explanation for as to why a bunch of violent humans are going to become their new best friends? I'll be explaining to my mercenaries why becoming friends with a bunch of peace-loving ponies is in their best interest."

She gave Celestia a sweet smile.

"Please have your affairs in order. And who knows? Maybe I'll throw in a special treat to sweeten our deal."

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

"Hey, lard-fat. What's up?"

Heavy looked back over his own shoulder, spotting that Scout was looking over him and not-minding-his-business-away-from-him like he preferred. The biggest member of the RED team rolled his eyes, knowing that denying the puniest little baby on their team the attention he wanted would only make it worse. Although knocking him out with a punch to the face was also an option. A very tempting option.

"Heavy is shopping for beds." He lifted the magazine in his hands up for Scout to see. "Is long overdue. Yes?"

"Wait, are you still sleepin' with Sasha?" Scout scratched his head, before throwing Heavy a look of skepticism. "You know 'dat's not normal, right big guy?"

"Da'." Heavy agreed. "I should have bought bed for Natasha as well. Was rude of Heavy not to."

"Huh? What about your other guns?"

"No. Huo-Long Heater sets cabin on fire, and Beast sleeps outside like dog. Tomislav is broken; Heavy must fix."

In hindsight, Scout really should have seen that coming. Rolling his eyes and blowing a raspberry, Scout got up and decided to run around elsewhere in Lumberyard to see what the rest of his team was up to. It was bound to be more interesting than watching mister fatty-fat-fat-fat look at beds for his compensation of all things. Between talking to his guns and lunch, Heavy was one of the weirder members of the team in his own morbidly obese way.

"Yo! Pyro!" Scout walked out from the building he was in. "Don't start any fires, you hear me?"

Caught in the act of trying to set some of the stacked logs on fire with his lighter, the Pyro jumped in surprised and hid it behind his back. "Mrrph? Hurr hurr, phrr phrrr hurdur," Pyro said, giving an innocent shrug.

"Yeah, well, just don't do it, man." Scout warned. "Don't waste your time startin' small fires, when you could be, like, burning way more stuff elsewhere."

Pyro rubbed his chin at Scout's sage advice and nodded. "Hmmrrmmm... Mmrph mhrr."

One of the signature traits of Lumberyard was the fact that the facility was located at the end of a lumber rail line, just before a before a massive cliff. As a result, the area was full of large cargo pallets filled with tree logs and other things meant for processing elsewhere. A lot of the industrial facilities and run down building that the RED and BLU teams had fought each other across looked like they had once been fully functional sites. But with the constant battle between both sides, most of the buildings and areas in between had become run down without maintenance.

"Ugh, man." Scout looked around at the beautiful pine forest surrounding him. "You know, nature sucks. What's a guy gotta' do to get a decent cup of joe around here."

He kept looking around, before spying a small trail of smoke coming from one of the highest towers in the central offices of the Lumberyard. Bingo, Scout thought to himself. There were only two people who would stay shut in on such a beautiful (but boring) afternoon, and both were a good source of entertainment for him.

So without another word, Scout began to parkour up the sides of anything he could find to climb up to the Sniper's lookout.

How many times had he watched Sniper leave from a team meeting and just go right up to his perch? He had always assumed that he would be in good enough shape to make the same trek Sniper made every time he had to relocate. (Being limber enough to run circles around your enemies tended to keep you in good shape.) But after climbing up on a pile of logs, scaling up a set of rusty gutters nailed deep into a building wall, running across a roof and double-jumping to the other side of the same building, even Scout was almost out of breath.

Taking a second to catch his breath, Scout peered around and looked into the window Sniper used to shoot at BLU back in the past. Before he could even a word, he found himself staring down the barrel of a submachine gun, with Sniper on the other end of it.

A couple of seconds passed where neither mercenary moved, with Sniper still pointing his gun at Scout, and Scout just looking back at him.

"...Hey man."

The Sniper scowled back down at him, still holding his submachine gun.

“What the bloody ‘ell do you think you’re doin’ here, Shirley?”

Scout cracked a grin. “I wanted to see where you go, man.”

Sniper raised an eyebrow, not convinced. Scout paused, still waiting to see if Sniper would put his gun away.

"Soooo, you gonna' let me in? My arms are gettin’ kinda tired here. I didn't take the stairs, I'm sure you noticed.”

After another couple of seconds, Sniper lowered his gun and motioned for Scout to come inside. Not wanting to wait for another second teetering outside the highest point in Lumberyard, Scout squeezed himself through the broken frames of the window and into the Sniper's nest.

"Don't. Touch. Anything." Sniper warned in a tone that meant business. He walked over to his seat, and picked his cigarette up from where he had placed it. "...You want a beer?"

"What? Really?" Scout asked. Looking around, it dawned on him that he had never really seen where or what Sniper would do with the places where he hung around. The rest of the team agreed sometimes that some of the more nicer supplies raided from BLU camps would go to select members of the team. Since Sniper often volunteered to wait long hours watching for the enemy, more than once Scout had seen some crazy loot go his way. He watched Sniper go over to a corner in the room, and after prying up some wooden boards in the wall, drag out a small electric refrigerator plugged into a hidden socket in the wall.

"So, are you just here because you missed me sheila?" Sniper opened up the cooler and dug around, picking out a bottle of Red Shed beer. The brand specifically made for the RED team by Redmond Mann's company, to counter the Blu Streak beer brand made by Blutarch Mann for his own team.

"Yeah, somethin' like that." The Scout looked around one last time, catching the beer in one hand and finding a pile of hay to sit down on. "I was wonderin' if you knew what was goin' on?"

"Hmm, hmm, hmm. Monsieur Scout wants to be in on the reason for our little...soiree, yes?"

"Who the--" Scout looked around, knowing the answer to who the sudden mystery voice speaking was. "Oh, you gotta' be kidding me. Spy!" Scout stood up, looking around the empty loft. There was no with him, except for Sniper wasn't finding either of their antics to be very funny. "What the hell! You're here too!?"

In the far corner of the loft was a table with two seats and a chess board on it. Scout and Sniper both watched as the familiar sound of the Cloak and Dagger invisibility watch echoed into the loft. With his legs crossed, the Spy flashed the Scout a smile before waving and looked down at the chess board. Examining each piece, the Spy reached into his pocket for his Spytron 3000 Disguise Kit which doubled as his cigarette case.

"But of course. But you're just in luck, the Sniper and I were discussing our new job before you came in."

Listening to his words, Scout took a few seconds to stop and think. He took a sip of his beer, before throwing himself down on a hay pile with a groan.

"So...I guess that story about bus loads of hot chicks comin' to see me was a load of bullshit, huh?"

Sniper and Spy said nothing, exchanging looks at each other.

Chapter 3: Pick Your Class

To the members of the old/new RED Team,

It was come to my attention that you have returned to our company in search of employment. I will not comment on the matter, because I am sure that your overwhelming faith in Team Fortress Industry's capability to properly utilize your unique talents was the cause. In fact, I am glad to hear that you have returned to our employment, since there are a never ending stream of incidents that require your unique understanding of problem "solving." One of which has just come up.

For your first assignment back, I am assigning some of you to guard some very special VIPs that have selected Team Fortress Industries and Mann Co. to be their primary caretakers.

As always, failure is not an option.

This deal was negotiated over some very selective terms, and both Team Fortress Industries and Mann Co. have invested heavily into your success. I am assigning you, some of the strongest mercenaries in the former RED team, to this mission because you have proven yourselves in the past. More details about your assignment will be provided to you after you arrive in the capital of Equestria, Canterlot.

You will also be in the presence of true royalty, often, so I expect you all to conduct yourselves in a manner fitting for mercenaries selectively chosen by Team Fortress Industries and Mann Co. In other words, do not make a monkey out of yourselves by thinking your unusual hat puts you on par with them.

Expecting mediocre results,

The Administrator.

P.S.: I suggest you arrive prepared to fight. Be sure to make your first impressions good ones.

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

Celestia clutched the note in her hoof, having it read it over for what felt like the tenth time in the week.

Be prepared to fight? Could it be a warning for what threats I described? Or is something else...?

"Good evening, sister."

Inviting herself in, Princess Luna strode into her older sister's bedroom from the balcony where she had landed. She immediately took notice to the disheveled and messy state her older sister's room was in. For whatever reason, the normal servants responsible for cleaning and maintaining the castle hadn't been allowed in during the day. It probably had something to do with the fact that Celestia was surrounded by papers on her bed. Papers that contained sensitive information on them that she didn't want anypony to see. On a table next to her was a small serving tray of baked goods, and a half-finished cup of coffee that had been refilled several times.

Celestia remained affixed to her paperwork around her. "Mmm. Same to you, Luna."

"Oh my, such a stern expression," Luna mused, circling around her older sister's bed. "What troubles you, Tia?"

Celestia placed down the paper and quill held by her magic. "I've decided to accept Helen's offer. But I am still worried about these...champions of hers."

"Oh?" Luna nodded in understanding. She then tapped her chin in thought with her hoof. "Are you worried about being double crossed? Or that nine blood thirsty lunatics will be freely roaming our lands? Or do you think that Twilight and her friends won't understand why they need to be protected by several ruthless, monstrous, ab--"

"Luna! Please!" Celestia cut her sister off. "I'm in no mood for your sense of humor."

"Tsk, tsk. You worry far too much, Tia." With a spring in her step, Luna circled around Celestia one more time and snatched up the last sugar pastry from the tray. "These things have a way of working themselves out, yes?"

"That's exactly what I'm worried about." Celestia sighed. "Nothing good has ever come from our interactions with humanity."

"I cannot say that I know," Luna puffed her cheeks out. "Because SOME mare I know happened to schedule diplomatic discussions when I was in the middle of my beauty rest."

"Luna, as I've told you, you didn't miss anything," Celestia muttered, trying to not remember the meeting that had brought up more questions than answers. "If anything, you would probably have objected to their coming to Equestria."

"Nonsense!" Luna waved her older sister off. "I always welcome a little change to break up the monotony of our courts."

That's because you usually sleep through it, Celestia couldn't help but think, while Luna took her cup up with her magic and finished off the rest of her coffee without asking. A swarm of parasprites, Discord's revival, the royal wedding, and an attack by a giant fire-breathing Cockatrice were a few incidents Celestia had dealt with that Luna had slept soundly through. If Chrysalis attacks again, maybe I'll let her put you in one of those nasty cocoons first.

"So!" Luna continued cheerfully, unaware of her sister's devious thoughts. "When did you say that they would be arriving?"

"Some time tomorrow. Would you like me to wake you?"

"Of course!" Luna trotted toward the exit of Celestia's room, a small smile across her face. "This is our diarchy, after all. They are first guests we have entertained from another dimension in...a millennia! Now, if you'll excuse us."

"Luna!" The princess of the night could hear the warning tone in her older sister's voice. "I told everypony to stay away from the teleporter room. I don't care if it is deactivated, I don't want anypony near it." Luna rolled her eyes and let out a sigh.

"We were just considering a small walk around the castle before we begin the night court. Since you seem so busy after your normal hours, we wanted to leave you in peace."

"I'm sorry, Luna. I didn't mean to sound overbearing." Celestia apologized, and Luna secretly congratulated herself for staying innocent after getting caught. "I'm just still very worried about this whole idea. Do you think I'm worrying too much?"

"About what?" Luna turned her neck around, opening the doors to leave. "Twilight and her friends being in danger? Or the reliability of Helen's champions?"

"...Both."

"Well, we are certainly unsure of what the future holds," Luna ran a hoof through her astral mane, turning back to her sister and letting it blow in the wind coming inside from the open balcony. She flashed her a confident smile before she continued. "But are we not an example of what can happen with a little faith in those close to you?"

"Yes... Of course," Celestia returned the assuring smile Luna was trying to give her. But your pain is something I could have prevented, if had known better...

"Well, excuse us as we take our leave." Luna said simply, with her head held high. "We shall speak again at dawn, dear sister."

"Of course, Lulu. Goodnight to you."

Closing the doors to Celestia's chambers behind her, Luna looked out the windows of the hallway at her moon shining bright in the sky. Outside her night sky held a deceiving calm, that showed no signs of the troubles and turmoils living creatures still experienced in parts of the world. A thousand years ago, she never would have imagined that she would come to rule over a kingdom of thousands upon thousands of ponies with her sister. The idea still amazed her, and she thought about it endlessly before going to bed in the morning after the night court.

The future truly was uncertain. That much was for certain.

"Our sister doth worry too much," Luna told herself, breaking into a brisk trot. "But we shall remain vigilant."

The night court could wait for another night. Tonight, there were curiosities to be satisfied.

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

"And... What does this do? Oh, this is cool."

"Shirley... What have you learned 'bout touchin' booksmart's toys?"

Down on the ground Scout poked the modified teleporter carefully, looking at all of the sleek and curved surfaces that the Engineer's regular teleporters never had. Placed in the central capture point of the Lumbermill, it was wired to several larger computers and power generators that had been brought in during the days after their arrival. The platform where members of the RED team would stand to go from one place to another seemed the same, abet much bigger. But the actual arms of the teleporter that rotated like the props on an airplanes rotor had multiplied to five.

"Hey, don't pretend like you're not curious," Scout said, looking back over his shoulder at the Sniper. "You wanta' see what a land filled with talkin' technicolor pansy ponies is like too, don't you?"

"I still think this is some shonky business," Sniper spat. "How do we know this isn't some giant trap to off us for good?"

"Huh, you know, I didn't think of it that way." Scout admitted. He continued to looked around, until he noticed the on/off switch in the same place that the Engineer's teleporters normally had them. "You think hard-hat's got this workin?"

"Scout, I'm warnin' ya." Sniper furrowed his brow as Scout inched closer to the button. "Don't go messing with truckie's toys."

"Ah, chill out, man." Scout waved the Sniper off with his hand. "I totally know what I'm doing."

Not listening to the Sniper giving him another warning, Scout pressed the button on the base of teleporter to turn on the automatic assembly process. Like so many times he'd seen it before, the teleporter entrance began to unfold itself and self-assemble, making mechanical sounds as it unpacked itself.

Click. Whhhiiiiiiiirrrrrrrr... Beep.

"Oh baby, there we go." Scout rubbed his hands together in anticipation, watching the teleporter finish its normal routine and begin to power up.

"Don't even think about going in there! Cripes, mate. You don't know if he's even put in the right coordinates."

"Since it turned on, it means that Del put an exit somewhere. Right?" Scout hovered over the edge of the teleporter, looking into the glowing red light that lead to a one-way trip to anywhere in the universe. "And you know the Engineer, he always plans these things out well ahead of time."

"Your funeral, mate." Sniper grunted, watching Scout lean closer and closer to the powered teleporter.

All five arms of the teleporter were spinning fast enough that they were generating a small wind around them like a fan. Scout rarely took the Engineer's teleporters, since in a combat situation it was better to let slower members of the team reach the front lines first. It wasn't that teleporting hurt or anything, going from one place to another possibly thousands of miles away in the blink of an eye was crazy for the Scout. It didn't help either that the journey was a one-way trip, with no hope of return or rescue if the teleporter exit was destroyed.

Thinking about his odds to himself, Scout stood up and started to back away from the teleporter. Behind him, Sniper chuckled.

"Having second thought, Shirley?"

"Yeah, well," Scout stood up and continued to shuffle back. "The universe is a big place, right? I don't want to get sent to medieval times in some alternate dimension or some crazy shit."

"Oh? Is that right?" Sniper said, deciding to play along.

"Yeah, and...and, like, I don't have my track bag with me filled with all my stuff. I wouldn't want to go without being prepared, right? I need my guns, my ammo, my hats and clothes..."

"Yeah. Uh-huh. Sure." Sniper agreed as Scout continued to ramble on, all the while sneaking closer behind the fast talking Bostonian.

"And I gotta, uh, write a letter! Yeah! I gotta' write back to my family about--" Scout stopped talking, and turned around to see Sniper face to face with him. "...Um?"

Without a word, Sniper pushed Scout onto the teleporter entrance.

"Thanks for standin' still, wanker." Sniper said, giving Scout a wink.

"WHAT!?" Scout yelled, trying to pick himself up. But he knew it was already too late. He could feel the teleporter under him pulling him right down to atoms into the machine, to be sent to wherever the machine was connected. There was nothing that could be done to save himself from going on a free ride across dimensions. "YOU CAMPIN' CONVICT! I'M GONNA--"

And with a red flash of light, Scout was gone.

"Heh, heh, heh," Sniper chuckled to himself, fishing around in his back pocket for his cigarettes. "That'll teach you, ya' little mongrel."

Now then...

To describe what it's like to go through an Engineer's teleporter is something hard to do. Not just because the trip is usually instantaneous, but because the bright camera-like flash is the only thing most people can remember going from point A to point B. There was nothing in between. No time for life changing visions. No visiting the cosmos. No seeing your own molecular structure broken down and sent through australium-fueled super technology. Nothing.

It certainly never involved falling, which Scout was doing a lot of right now.

"AAAAAUUUUUUUUUGHHH!" Scout screamed at the top of his lungs, waving and failing his arms helplessly as he continued to tumble over and over in some kind of red energy vortex. There was no signs above him of where he had come from, and no signs below him of where he was going to land.

And so Scout fell...

"Aaahhhhhhhh!"

And fell...

"Aaahhhhh...pant, pant, pant... Aaahhhhhh!"

And fell...

"Aahhhhh...ahhh...ugh..."

And continued to fall...

Until after a few minutes, Scout stopped screaming and decided to fall to his doom in silence.

Holy crap this goes on forever, he thought to himself still tumbling head over heels in the void. Looking around, the universe (or between universes?) he was in seemed to just be like a giant funnel of electricity colored red. In between the flashing lights were little stars, or explosions. Needless to say, it would be a bad idea to try and reach out and grab a hold of something, he reasoned.

"Is this crap gonna' end any time soon?" Scout shouted at no one in particular. "If I'm gonna' die, just kill me al--"

And then without warning, Scout arrived.

"AAAHHHHHH!"

"EEEEEP!"

Princess Luna screamed in surprise, but quickly covered her own mouth as she scrambled toward the corner of the room and into the shadows. She had thought herself clever sneaking into the teleporter room without her own guards noticing, but it mattered little since her magic was beyond what any guards of the castle were on level with detecting. To her surprise, the machine had been turned on by somepony before she had entered the room. And now, just before she could finish her inspection, the infernal device had ejected some kind of hairless ape wearing clothes out of its magic well.

"What the devil?" Luna questioned, watching the strange creature take pick itself up off of the floor. She adjusted her own tiara self consciously as the mystery creature put his hat back on his head. "Could this be?"

She watched as the teleporter spit out what appeared to be a backpack of some sort, which hit the poor creature from behind and knocked him down onto the floor again.

"Oh, that BASTARD!" Scout shouted enraged. "When I get my hands on that stupid camper, I'm gonna' make him drink his own piss!"

How uncouth this creature is, Luna couldn't help but think, after listening him continue to cuss out someone unknown to her. Are all of his kind so unruly? Perhaps our sister was right; we must be cautious.

Waiting a moment for the creature to collect his things and place his bag over his back, Luna cleared her own throat loud enough so that she was sure he would hear.

"Ahem."

She watched the hairless ape freeze in place, suddenly aware that he wasn't alone.

"You there. Are you perchance a member of...Reliable Excavation and Demolition?"

Normally, Scout's first reflex was to run. Naturally. It wasn't meant as a form of disrespect, but when you (on rare occasions) found yourself in a place you weren't familiar with and someone you don't know tells you to not move (or implies that you shouldn't) you don't listen. Especially when people who usually did that were dressed in the color blue, and planned to kill you regardless of whether you listened. But the sight before him made Scout freeze. Completely freeze, as if he had just been backstabbed by a Spy with a spycicle.

"Umm," Scout said intelligently, failing to find the words to answer.

Standing in the shadowy corner of the room (almost as if she had been hiding) was some kind of horse with wings and horn. Not just any horse (ignoring the wings and the horn), but a horse out of some crazy ancient history mythology story. Her mane and tail matched her deep blue coat, shining with little stars and waving majestically on its own. Her eyes were big with teal colored irises, that held an alert attentiveness that was beyond any animal on earth. She also wore some kind of silvery regalia, befitting someone of higher status than some common...horse.

In short, Scout was suddenly glad that he had arrived where he was supposed to.

And realized that he was looking stupid in front of one of the only creatures his boss had warned him not to.

"We say again, can you understand us?" Luna asked, with caution in her voice. "Are you a member of the RED team?"

"Oh! Uh," Scout jumped up immediately, surprising her a little as he looked himself over. Everything he had planned on wearing for his first meeting was still packed in his supply crate back in the base at Lumbermill. "Awww, crap."

"...Is something the matter? What say you? Speak up!"

What are you doing, moron! Play it cool! Just...just, chill! Deep breath. Gotta relaaaaax...

"Milady," Scout started, desperately trying to remember how his words would change whenever he visited DeGroot Keep. "I am Sir Scout, knight of DeGroot Keep. Who do...er...I have the...uh...honor of addressing?"

Luna almost bursting out laughing at the young human's behavior. She was well aware that the world he was coming from was much like the modern Equestria, and nothing like her world had been several hundred years ago. Still, she decided to play along for a little. It would be amusing, to say the least. Maybe she would have him keep her company through the night court.

"We are Princess Luna, diarch of the Equestrian Empire." Luna spread her wings as she spoke. "We were awaiting your arrival, Sir Scout. Where are your other comrades in arms?"

"The guys?" Scout asked, shaking his head and kicking himself for breaking character. "Oh! Uh, well, your majesty, I took it upon myself to, uh, arrive early. You know, give the palace a once over to see if everything was alright? For security reasons!"

Could this young human be some sort of a spy? Luna thought about it silently. The secrecy of their arrival would make for the perfect cover for their parent company to sneak some humans in as spies. After all, if she hadn't broke into the room on her own volition, who would have known about this...Sir Scout's arrival? She had even read over papers showing technology and other devices that could mask the appearances of the users.

Perhaps he is more dangerous than we first imagined. We should keep him close, so he can not slip past our hooves...

"Very well then!" Walking up to him, Luna gave the Scout a warm, welcoming look and held out her hoof to him. "We welcome you to Equestria. Will you accept our invitation to join us for breakfast?"

"Wait, breakfast?" Scout looked outside a nearby window, seeing the moon raised high and the stars shining.

"Yes, breakfast," Luna repeated before explaining. "I am responsible for ruling over my kingdom with my sister. She raises the sun and governs our lands during the day, and we are responsible for raising the moon and ruling during the night."

"Really?" Scout turned his head. "Wow! That's pretty bad ass. You can actually raise the moon by yourself?"

"Oh? Erm, yes." Luna said, caught a little off guard. There were many things used to describe her role and powers throughout her years, but bad ass usually wasn't one of them. It was a compliment of course, but such a blunt one that the regent of the moon found herself at a loss of words. She hastily cleared her throat to recompose herself.

"Now, we ask again: would you care to join us for breakfast before we begin the night court?"

"Sure!" Scout grinned, taking her hoof in his hand and leading her out to the doors. "What's on the menu, princess?"

"Hmm... Do you like oatmeal pancakes?"

"Do I!? Hah! Let me tell you a story..."

Princess Luna and Scout strode boldly out the doors, ignoring the questions of the two guards who were supposed to have not let anyone into the room, never mind out. Already engrossed in their conversation (which was mostly Scout bragging and Luna listening), they failed to notice the teleporter giving off sparks in the room they were leaving. With another bright flash of light, the inter-dimensional teleporter spit out the another mercenary, tossing him out as haphazardly as it had the Scout.

"Merde," the Spy muttered, picking himself up and pulling the cowl of his dashin' hashshashin back over his head.

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

Deep in the crystal caverns below Canterlot, and even farther from the eyes and ears of the Equestrian Guard, the busy buzz and chittering of creatures hiding in the shadows echoed in the darkness. One by one in single file, they marched in perfect unison down pathways undeterred by the confusing chasms of the caves they were in. They drove onward together, with no hesitation between any of them.

Finally, the marching line stopped with the lead creature scanning the darkness ahead.

"...My queen, have you returned to us?"

"Yes. I hope you and your swarm are prepared, sergeant. Tonight we shall seize Canterlot castle from the inside, and make Celestia pay for her arrogance."

"We are ready, my queen. We shall obey as we always have, for the swarm."

"Yesss," Chrysalis hissed, looking at her beautiful reflection in one of the crystals growing out of the walls. "Even after I imprisoned her niece in these caverns, they have done nothing to secure them from our use. We will infiltrate the castle, and begin our attack after I have fed from Celestia's power in her sleep."

"Yes, your majesty."

"Prepare yourself sergeant. We will make our new hive cluster in Canterlot castle, and from there, devour this world!"

Chapter 4: KotH Canterlot (Part 1)

Princess Luna watched in silence as Scout continued to shovel his meal into his mouth, only stopping for a second to take a drink of his milk before continuing. It wasn't that she found his relentless eating disgusting and ill-mannered, rather, it was a change compared to higher-class company who always waited for her to do anything before doing anything themselves. The skinny human had been eating for ten minutes straight, only stopping and exchanging a few words when the cooks from the kitchen would come to refill his plate. Looking up and down at his body frame, it amazed her that someone so scrawny could be putting away so much food.

"We take it that the food is to your liking?" Luna asked dryly.

"It's not bad," Scout said nonchalantly. "But man, I haven't had a well cooked meal in a long time."

"Well cooked? We are sure our chefs will be pleased to hear such compliments."

"Yeah. I mean, hell, I haven't had milk that wasn't from powder in a few years."

Powder? Luna blinked in thought as Scout waved his empty glass in the air, and one of the servants came to take it to be refilled. Was milk something that could be turned into dry powder in their world? In fact, how many other things did the human world have that Equestria did not? Celestia had been rather cryptic in talking about the human world, and Scout seemed more than willing to divulge in anything she asked about.

In fact, it was almost too good to be true in some aspects. She had tried to keep Scout's presence in the castle as much of a secret as possible, at least for the first night. She had even gone as far as to assure her servants and guards not to wake her elder sister, claiming that Scout was a diplomat from a faraway land of Teufort that she would be entertaining for the evening. A small white lie, but one that was technically true.

She wondered quizzically, if these RED team mercenaries were such professionals, why had one wandered into a teleporter and into her world out of curiosity? Had it been an accident, as he claimed? Was it something so simplistic, for a creature whom Celestia had always warned her about being too smart for their own good? Humans (supposedly) all had a violent streak, but so far, all Scout had done damage to were the pancakes on his plate.

"Scout," Luna pushed a lone blueberry on her plate around with a fork as she spoke. She wanted to probe as much information out of him as possible while she still had the chance. "Tell us about your...job. Tell me what it's like being on the RED team."

"Huh? My job?" Scout leaned back in his seat, his eyes looking around the room of the royal dining hall at all of the fancy luxuries. "It's kind of boring, really. I don't think you'd wanta' hear about that."

"Oh, but I do," Luna insisted. Had he been sworn to secrecy about his world? Or was he just being modest? "We can imagine that it was very tough, and made you into the big and strong human you are."

"Heh. Well, you got 'dat right sister." Scout looked at both his arms, striking a pose where he tensed his muscles. "Both these guns got me outta' a lot of trouble in the past. I've beaten my fair share of brains in over my years."

"Hahaha. Scout had done much, but is still so small. Is funny to me."

"Ugh, ignore him." Scout bit into another bite of his pancakes, pointing to Heavy who was just seating himself at the table with them. "Fatso here wouldn't know a real...real..."

Scout and Luna both froze.

Scout looked at Heavy, and without warning spit out his mouthful of pancakes almost hitting Luna in the face.

Blocking Scout's disgusting chew remains with her magic, Luna jumped up and out her seat with her wings flared. How had another human managed to sneak past everyone in the castle!? How had he managed to take a seat next to them with either of them noticing!? Especially when he was so BIG! What were her guards doing!?

"How dare you! Who do you--!?"

"HEAVY!" Scout shouted, wiping his mouth on the table cloth after he had spit out his breakfast. Noticing that Scout at least recognized him, Luna calmed herself down. "What the hell!? When did... How did... WHAT THE HELL, MAN!"

"What?" Heavy produced a knife and fork in each hand, which were downright puny compared to his massive fists. He banged them on the table impatiently, as if waiting to be served. "Do you think you could get away with having nice meal without me? No. You will learn to share, tiny man."

Luna looked at Scout, and then at the newcomer who (for his intimidating size) only seemed to want to be served. She looked around, and remembered how she had dismissed her personal guard for the night because of the secrecy around Scout's presence in Equestria. Had this... Heavy used that to his advantage? Was someone as large as him capable of being sneaky? Were there more humans in the castle that she didn't know of?

Cautiously, she cleared her throat to get his attention while seating herself.

"Excuse us... But you are?"

"Da'. Heavy has not introduced himself. Was very rude of Heavy." Taking a napkin off of the table and stuffing into the neck of his shirt under his vest like a bib, Heavy placed his knife and fork down onto the table. "I am Heavy Weapons Guy. Proud member of RED team. You are Princess Luna, yes?"

"We...are." Luna was taken a little back. "Mister Heavy... When did... No. HOW did you get here?"

"Heavy followed the smell of breakfast. Scout is right, RED team has not had fresh food to eat for very long."

Taking in his answer, Luna hummed to herself in thought.

"Tell us, did anypony see you come in here?"

"No. Heavy can be very sneaky when he wants to be, hahaha." Heavy looked around at the dining room, impressed at how large and well flourished it was. Having grown up in poverty, he kept his cabin in Siberia well furnished but frugal at the same time. "Havchik is still being served, yes?"

"B-breakfast?" Luna shook her head, clearing out the hundreds of questions and doubts that were still filling her mind. If all he wanted was to eat breakfast with them, who was she to deny him?

"Yes! Of course! Do you mind having pancakes and fruit with us?"

"Da. Sounds very good." Heavy grinned like an eager child. Across from him Scout let out an audible groan, running the palm of his hands over his face. "Is all of Equestria like this? Heavy thinks there will be many good times in the future."

Before Luna could answer (and Scout make a snarky comment), the large double doors to the royal dining hall slowly opened with a loud creak. As proud as royalty, a bat-pony dressed in the traditional armor of the Night Guard strode in giving all others present a gracing look of contempt.

"Guardsman!" she snapped at the bat-pony was followed in by others behind her. She looked back and Heavy and Scout, realizing that there was no place to hide them even if she could. "We gave strict order this evening that we were to be left alone! Explain yourselves!"

The bat-pony regarded Luna with a fang-filled sneer, turning his snout up at her as the five other guards that had followed her in formed a line in front of her.

"Well!?" Luna demanded again, only to be met with more silence. Scout and Heavy looked at each other, eyebrows raised. Finally, the lead bat-pony let out a haughty laugh.

"Hahaha... Poor little Woona, always the last to learn about anything."

"YOU." Luna's single word carried enough venom and hatred that even Scout and Heavy flinched.

Bursting into a sickly green flame, all of the bat-ponies began to transform back into their original forms. Scout and Heavy gawked, as the bat-ponies all burnt away their disguises revealing their black chitinous bodies. Chrysalis let out another haughty laugh, with her changeling soldiers joining in as well. Luna immediately jumped out of her chair, knocking it to the floor with a loud crash. In the air she spread her wings, landing back on the floor with a loud slam while Scout and Heavy still sat quietly watching.

"Yo, big guy," Scout whispered, jerking a thumb at the changelings. "That look familiar to you too?"

"Yes," Heavy whispered bitterly. "Reminds Heavy of...how you say? Dime of dozen, shape shifting back-stabbers?"

"Eh, close enough." Scout shrugged, wanting to see how things would play out.

"How DARE you return here!" Luna shouted, with all the fury she could muster. Her horn began to glow with a dim light, slowly sparking and growing brighter with each passing second. "You will REGRET showing your pathetic selves to us!"

"I'm positively terrified," Chrysalis mocked, rolling her eyes as she did. "Oh no! The alicorn of sleeping is going to destroy me!" Whatever will I do?"

Luna felt herself growing beyond furious. Standing before her was enemy without honor; a lying and cheating villain who had stooped to the lowest of lows with foalnapping and impersonation. Chrysalis had made a mockery of Shining Armor and Cadance's love, using it only as fuel to empower her wicked ambitions. And now with unbridled arrogance, she had re-entered Canterlot and the royal castle just to mock her!?

"Are you going to attack me?" Chrysalis taunted. "Or would you rather let Celestia try again?"

"VERY WELL!" Luna roared. "Those words shall be your LAST!"

Rearing up on her hind legs, the princess of the night let loose a stream of lightning from her horn the enveloped the entire dining hall in a bright flash of light. It was almost as if the Engineer was using his short circuit projectile destroyer, but with at least a hundred times the brightness and intensity. Scout shouted something, putting his arms up and shielding his eyes. Behind him Heavy was doing the same, but the runner couldn't hear him over the sound of Luna's magic.

After a few seconds the lightning stopped, and Luna waited for the smoke generated from her attack to clear. Scout and Heavy remained sitting at the table, both waiting to see the aftereffects as well.

"...No! That's not possible!" she audibly gasped, seeing Chrysalis remaining unhurt from her attack. The changeling queen was hiding behind her own forelegs, but what had saved her was a rotten green shield of magic energy being channeled by the five changelings warriors in front of her. Luna recognized the spell instantly, and could feel her anger burning more intensely as a result.

"Shining Armor's magic shield!" Luna shouted. "Not only do you steal appearances, but spells as well!?"

"Hmph," Chrysalis looked down at her warriors with a grim satisfaction, having survived from their added power to her own. "I see you are stronger than your sister in some respects. How surprising. I'm glad I came prepared."

"Perhaps we can not outright smite you like the monster you are," Luna lowered her head, her horn sparking and arcing electricity. "But that shield will not last forever!"

"Uh... Hey?" Still sitting at the table in the dining hall, the Scout raised his hand and spoke to no one in particular. "Can we get an explanation for those who don't live here? What the shit is happening?"

"Perhaps not, but I have no intention of staying on the defensive this night!" Chrysalis signaled her guard, and the shield hovering around them slowly vanished.

"You might think yourself clever, but you won't defeat us!" Luna declared, beginning to focus for a second attack.

"Uhh... Hello? Is...is anybody paying attention to me?" Scout looked around. "Really? We're gonna' be this way?" he asked, only to still be ignored.

"I don't need to defeat you to win; I only need to keep you right where you are!"

The horns of Chrysalis' five changelings guards began to glow again. But instead of wrapping the protective shield around themselves, the sickly green aura began to take shape and form around where Luna was standing. The moon's regent let out a yelp of surprise, but quickly realized what was happening and let loose her attack. Like before a powerful bolt of magical electricity was discharged like a torrential lightning storm, but the magic aura around her dispersed her spell into nothingness. Before she could charge another attack, the green mist around her began to solidify into a tight sphere that even lifted her off of the floor.

"Damn you!" Luna threw herself at the shield, now her prison, but with each strike of her hooves it remained solid. Ramming the shield with her entire body, she slumped against it in defeat as it still held firm without the slightest sign of weakening. She remembered how Shining's shield had managed to stand the blows of a hundred changelings, even after being weakened by Chrysalis' magic. If it was the same shield being casted by all five changeling warriors in front of her, she would have no way of breaking out of it alone.

"Struggle all you want! My forces will soon flood in from the crystal caverns, and then we will conquer this castle before your night is over!" Chrysalis threw her head back and let out a triumphant laugh.

"Soon, victory will be mine! Ah-hahahaaaaa--!"

But before Chrysalis could finish her villainous laughter, the head of one of her soldier exploded.

Instantly she was sprayed with a mess of gore and ichor all over her face and body; a green shower of blood, guts, and chitin which contrasted with the shining black surface of her own body. Frozen in silence and shock, she slowly looked over at the guilty party responsible. Inside her magic prison Luna had jumped at the sudden carnage, and she felt her jaw fall slack as she looked at the damage that had been inflicted instantly.

"...Yo."

In one hand Scout flipped his baby face's blaster around, working the lever-action and reloading the scattergun.

"Finally listenin' to what I gotta' say, huh queenie?"

"Y-you!" Chrysalis looked at the smoking barrel of the weapon Scout held in his hand, and down to her dead warrior whose body had slumped over and begun bleeding profusely onto the floor. "You damned ape! What did you do!?"

"Oh? What? This?" Scout leveled his scattergun and pulled the trigger.

Both Luna and Chrysalis cringed at the loud blast of the shotgun shell going off, and in an instant after a high-pitched shriek filled the air. Chrysalis looked back down in horror, as another one of her warriors fell over writhing in pain and screaming at the top of its lungs. The front carapace of the changeling had been completely shattered, revealing the mangled innards of the creature combined with the fragmented remains of what had been its chest. For creatures that relied on their hard carapaces to absorb damage, she knew that such a gruesome wound would be fatal.

"What? You're gonna' cry now? Huh? You're gonna' cry?" Scout shouted, directed at the changeling he had just shot that was still bleeding and flailing on the floor. "Hey! Look! It's shape shifting into a dead thing."

Heavy chucked mirthfully. "Hohoho, that one always slaps me on the knee."

"You know, I figured somethin' sittin' here." Jumping up from his chair Scout got up and slung his scattergun over his shoulder, walking toward where Luna remained imprisoned. He walked with a deliberate spring in his step, and Chrysalis knew it was in mocking defiance of her. "I bet your guys are usin' all of their energy to keep Lulu over 'ere trapped, right? So they couldn't defend themselves from somethin' else headin' there way."

"And on top of that," Scout continued, not letting or bother to wait if Chrysalis had some sort of answer or retort. "I bet that this shield is now forty percent weaker with two of your freaks dead. Sooo... Princess?"

Not waiting for her cue, Luna reared up as far she could in the tight confines of the prison. Infusing her forelegs with combat magic rarely taught to anypony, she struck down on the green glittering surface of her cage. As soon as she did, a sharp jagged crack in the surface of the sphere appeared and began to run further and further down its surface with each following strike.

"No!" Chrysalis shouted. In panic she immediately began to channel her own magic, and the shield started to steadily repair itself as fast as Luna was damaging it. Joining her magic with her minions, she could feel her power and their being drained out.

"Ah, ah ah!" Scout tapped his scattergun that was still lazily hanging over his shoulder, a stark reminder to what he had done to two of her finest soldiers in an instant.

"Do you really want to keep workin' on keepin' her in there? Because I'm gonna' start knockin' you freaks off if you don't quit it."

Chrysalis felt a bead of sweat run down her like a cold chill, and not because she was working harder to make sure Luna stayed imprisoned where she had captured her. No, it was from the cold callousness of the skinny naked ape she had written off. Even with ponies, there had always been a level of restraint between both races. Hadn't the skinny one only asked moments ago what was going on? She had never experienced such outright hostility from a creature she had never met before in her life!

Did he have no empathy? No doubt or questioning toward taking life? Were the two changeling warriors he had killed a means to send a message to her? Or were they just sacrifices to impress Luna? Did Celestia even realize what kind of company her sister was keeping? And what of the larger one behind him, that seemed even more amused by everything that had happened? Would he prove to be just as, if not more, violent than the small one if he choose to become involved?

She felt sick. She recognized it immediately, despite never feeling sick from fear in her life.

Luna and Celestia would capture her, put her through Equestria's legal system, and sentence her. Mock court or not, they would at least be giving themselves the illusion that they cared. That Chrysalis could be changed. That her brood's very nature wasn't dictated at their birth. Maybe they would even try to have her reformed, by the holders of the elements of harmony no less.

But this ape and the bigger one was going to kill her. No questions. No care. No mercy. Nothing.

"Look... Run. Just run. Or fly, crawl, whatever it is you freaks do." Scout turned around, showing his back to her.

"Go ahead and get your little army. Attack the castle. See, cause' it don't matter; you lost the moment we stayed up for breakfast."

"How dar--! You--! I--! This--!!!" Between her own fear and her anger, Chrysalis simply couldn't form the words. The arrogance! To turn his back to her, when she could send a simple magic bolt straight through his body and destroy him like the scrawny monkey he was! She looked back at Luna and with her own head pounding in pain, she knew that it would be impossible to hold the princess imprisoned as had been originally planned. Everything had been ruined!

All because of these stupid...humans!

In an instant the shield around Luna melted, dispersing into a mist that fell to the floor like liquid. As fast as possible, the three surviving changeling warriors gathered around their queen to protect her as they back peddled to the door they had entered in.

"D-don't think you've won!" Chrysalis shouted, struggling to stay on her own legs after expending so much of her own magic. "Even if they help you, they can't defeat over two hundred of my children! You'll REGRET ever opposing me!"

And with one last declaration of defiance, Chrysalis was gone. The only sound left in the room was the steady buzz of her wings, growing dimmer and dimmer the faster she fled with her minions.

Left behind, Scout and Luna exchanged glances.

One looked at the other unsure of what to say, and the other looked at the other unsure of the same.

Still at the dining hall table, Heavy scratched his head and sighed.

"So... Heavy takes it that breakfast is over. Yes?"

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

The heavy rumble of the train's wheels against steel tracks signaled her coming closer and closer to her destination. Looking out at the night sky, Twilight Sparkle pondered what awaited her in Canterlot. Above her in her connected bunk bed Spike read through a newspaper, having been silent for most of the trip. It had been a normal week like any other for the Ponyville librarian, minus an incredibly vague yet urgent sounding letter from Princess Celestia.

I have something I would like to discuss with you regarding the other bearers of the Elements of Harmony. Please take a train to Canterlot over the weekend, but do not tell anypony else.

Strange. There was something strange about the wording of the letter. It wasn't that Twilight suspected it was a forgery or anything like that, but was Princess Celestia now relying on her to relay sensitive information about the Elements of Harmony back to her friends? Or was there something more she wasn't understanding?

"Spike, what do you think this is about?" Twilight asked for the tenth time that day, sitting up from her bunk bed. Sitting on his own bunk above her, Spike put down the Canterlot Times and shrugged.

"Beats me. You know how it is with Princess Celestia better than me."

"Sorry," she apologized, lying back down on her own bed. "I know I keep asking, but I'm just worried."

"Ahh, don't be Twi." Spike let out an audible yawn, and Twilight was reminded of how late it was past his normal bedtime. Several hours in fact, and she was surprised at how he was managing to stay awake.  "You gotta' lighten up sometimes. You're the personal student of the princess! There are plenty of things she probably would want to talk to you about in person than over a letter."

"Yeah, I guess so," Twilight reluctantly agreed.

Looking outside through the windows at the passing scenery, Luna's moon glowed over the landscape between Ponyville and Canterlot. It illuminated the world in hazy shadows in an almost foreboding fashion. Between Ponyville where she had started and Canterlot where she would arrive, it felt as if she were traveling through a tunnel in between both exits. Above her she could only catch glimmers of the stars shining, but without her telescope there was no way to appreciate their real beauty.

Twilight sighed into the mattress of the train car. Was she homesick already?

Or was there something about Canterlot?

She had lived her entire youth out in the streets of Canterlot, running between Celestia's school for prodigal unicorns, her home and loving family, and the great library of the royal castle. But after only two years in Ponyville, and a small lifetimes worth of experiences, had the small but quirky village replaced her home in her heart?

Twilight smiled. She knew the answer without having to say it.

"Twilight! Look!" Spike shouted, pointing up into the sky and snapping her out of her thoughts.

The train had begun to pull into the station, but there were an unusual amount of ponies gathered around the tracks. A very large amount, in fact. Almost as if they were piling around the tracks, afraid to be in the city. She could hear their murmurs and whispers, with questions being flung out left and right over something of great urgency. All of them were looking up in the direction of the royal castle, the same place where Spike was pointing urgently out the window.

Twilight immediately pulled down the window closest to her, and tried to look outside past the smokey steam billowing out from the train's smokestacks. What she saw when it cleared terrified her, filling her heart with an unspeakable dread.

Changelings.

There were changelings flying around the royal castle.

With a flash of her magic, Twilight instantly teleported out of the train-car and onto the station.

"Wait, Twilight! Wait!" Spike shouted after her, stumbling over his feet and running to get off the train.

But Twilight was already gone. Passing by ponies of all kinds, she paid no attention to their expressions or words as she bolted past them. Some were terrified, others were awestruck. It didn't matter. She could feel her adrenaline mixing with her magic as it propelled her forward as fast as her four legs could carry her. There were only two words came to Twilight's mind as she ran toward the royal castle.

Never again.

She would rather die than see so many ponies close to her get hurt.

Never. Again.

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

"Beating you is full-time job," Heavy whispered into the face of a whimpering changeling, before smashing its head against another one of its brethren and knocking both of them out.

"Oh man! I'm battin' a thousand!" Scout shouted, double jumping over a changeling's attempts at tackling him and swinging his sandman down on its head. Landing with a satisfying crack, he stuck his tongue out in disgust over the sticky green ichor dribbling down his weapon. "You know I hope this crap washes off, cause I really like this bat."

"Little man should worry more about self," Heavy commented, watching as the Scout jumped over another attempt at pinning him down. With his killing gloves of boxing on both of his fists, the Russian heavy-weight had been punching out every single changeling within reach with critical strikes. "Can you fight with such tiny fists?"

"Don't test me, big guy." Scout clubbed another changeling in the head with his bat. "These bandaged hands aren't for show!"

"Haha! But you are no match for me!" Heavy boasted back, and punched another changeling with enough force that it sent the body of the insectoid equine flying into a wall.

Midnight Blossom, a bat-pony and soldier of the Night Guard, watched as the two humans danced a dance of death. Both were engaging every changeling they could reach, or was dumb enough to stray into their range. The attack on the castle was entering a full hour now, and the chaos of the situation had prevented her from contacting anyone else to find out if there was fighting going on outside of the castle. Before being told to go fight alongside the two mercenaries, she had struggled to take down what changeling warriors she had fought in vicious fights.

But this...Scout and...Heavy fighting was something different.

Blood and carnage. The amount of gore the two were covered in from their fighting was enough to make it look as if both of them had waded through a river of changeling blood. But both mercenaries didn't look bothered in the slightest from all of the fighting, and were even managing to keep a competitive conversation with each other at the same time. As she watched, Scout brought his bat down and broke the horn of another changeling. He swiftly jumped into the air, dodging yet another charging tackle and letting the offending changeling slam into others clumsily. Heavy behind him threw out punch after punch, knocking aside changelings left and right with the enthusiasm of a baker kneading a lump of dough.

It was poetic.

A poem of chaos and destruction, and Midnight was happy that it wasn't being written about her.

Princess Luna had only been able to spare a brief few words before leaving to rally soldiers elsewhere, but she had explicitly said that both mercenaries wouldn't need help fighting. She probably never would have guessed, Midnight humbly admitted, that it would be the two mercenaries that were helping the Night Guard.

If Cloud Skipper were here he would never believe this, she thought to herself. The number of changelings that were charging down the main hall leading to the Elements toward them was finally beginning to thin out. Probably from the sight of seeing so many of their kind splattered out and bleeding out all around the hall leading up to the room.

"So, what happens now?" Heavy stopped and head butted a changeling that had jumped in the air at him with its fangs bared. "Will this stoopid fighting ever end?"

"What, are you getting tried?" Scout taunted, taking a second to catch his breath and wipe his brow. He groaned in disgust, after noticing that he had just wiped more changeling blood from his arms onto his face. "Oh god, don't look at me! I'm slightly less handsome!"

Heavy simply rolled his eyes at his smaller comrade's antics. Surveying the chaos, he could see that the last of the changelings fighting were either dying or fleeing out the broken windows of the hall. In his head he nostalgically remembered what it sounded like when Administrator congratulated the RED team for clearing a wave of Gray Mann's robots, and he wondered if Scout was thinking the same.

Deciding that it was safe to take a break, he began to strap off his gore-splattered killing gloves of boxing and pulled out his midnight snack he had stolen from the kitchen.

"Om nom nom, omph nom." Heavy took a large bite out of his sandvich. "Moist and delicious, hehaha!"

"Yeah. Hey, good job there big-guy," Scout chuckled, taking the cue from Heavy as he began to unwrap the blood soaked bandages from around his hands. Reaching into the track bag on his back, he pulled out a can of Bonk! Atomic Punch and opened it to drink. "Frickin' unbelievable. We're here, what? An hour? Two? And look at this crap."

"Da." Heavy took another bite of his sandvich. All around him, the Night Guard was starting to realize that they had won the battle. For now. Some with the energy left in them were cheering, while others were more concerned with carrying away their injured. "Heavy did not sign up for this."

"You an' me both 'pal," Scout groaned into his can of radioactive soda. "You an' me both..."

"What are you two doing!?" From down the hall both Heavy and Scout heard a voice shouting at them. Sprinting down the hall as if she were being chased by the devil, a purple unicorn with hues matching her coat in her mane (except for a pink stripe) ran up to them. Her eyes were a mixture of fear, anticipation, and anger, and even as she stopped from sprinting up to them she continued to trot in place.

"Your names are Heavy and Scout, right!? Come on! You have to help me!"

"Sis, we don't have to do jack." Scout groaned, taking a last sip of what he felt was going to be a half-finished soda. "We'll get back to fightin' in a little, okay? Don't worry your horn off."

"No! Listen to me!" Twilight began to pull Scout with her magic by his arm. "I can't get in touch with the guards in the higher spires! I think Chrysalis is after Princess Celestia!"

"Woah, woah, woah," Scout planted his feet down firmly. "So, wait. Doesn't that just mean that Chrysalis is gonna' get destroyed on her own? Princess Celestia is, like, all powerful and stuff like her sister? So what's the rush?"

Scout's simple question brought up the painful memories Twilight had been trying to suppress. Not just running through the castle and fighting changelings for a second time, but ever since the end of her brothers royal wedding. Everypony refusing to believe her. Being captured and imprisoned by Chrysalis. Chrysalis later being caught and revealing herself. Celestia, her mentor and idol, taking a stand and trying to stop her. And failing. Failing in defeat.

And her failure to reach the Elements of Harmony after.

"Please!" Twilight begged, her voice almost cracking. She tried to push back the tears of fear that were welling up in her eyes. "I don't have time to explain! We have to go and protect her! NOW!"

"Scout." Heavy looked down at the runner who was stubbornly resisting and shook his head. "We go together. Now."

"Aww, geez. Really man?" Scout scratched his head. He looked down at Twilight who looked like she was going to run off without them, and back to Heavy who was giving a disapproving frown. Finally, he threw his arms up in defeat. "Alright, alright! Let's go already. God."

"We go together," Heavy repeated, slipping another pair of boxing gloves with flaming racing stripes painted on them over his hands. The Russian heavyweight looked down at Twilight as they began to run. "Can little pony defend?"

"Defend?" Twilight stopped for a second, not understanding what he meant. "Wait, can I defend myself? Yes! Yes I can!"

"Good. We will bring them pain without end." Heavy pointed his gloved fists forward with a wild grin on his face.

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

Chapter 5: KotH Canterlot (Part 2)

Twilight Sparkle took aim again, firing a shot from her horn that knocked aside a changeling in the pack that had surrounded Scout. Being carried like a sack of potatoes on Heavy's shoulder, the Russian giant was fending off changelings with his free fist while holding her firmly (but gently) in place with the other. After more than a few ambushes by marauding changelings in the castle, she had begun to feel the exhaustion from repeatedly using her magic for fighting. Without a word he had picked her up, placing her over his shoulder with ease. He explained that Scout and himself had known each other for a very long time, and that Scout was used to his running speed. (And that Twilight weighed nothing compared to somepony by the name of Sasha.) At first Twilight had been worried that carrying her would handicap him from fighting, but he had simply shrugged off her worries with a disconcerting smile.

"Is not fair to fight cowards who are so tiny," Heavy had said, still grinning from ear to ear. "This will make things fun, yes?"

Fun. It had taken a moment for her brain to register that he had actually said that. And meant it.

Fun was the last word Twilight would have ever used to describe fending off a hostile invasion that threatened everypony close to her. Although Heavy had slowly begun to take fighting a little more seriously now that he was looking after her as well, the skinnier human that hadn't wanted to help her earlier was still treating the whole affair like a giant game.

"Disguise 'dat!" Scout shouted, bringing his bat down on the head of yet another changeling and knocking it out cold. He then let out a loud and happy laughter, wiping the blood off of his wooden baseball bat on a tapestry hanging from a wall. "Man, their skulls are so soft that it's makin' this easy."

Twilight felt something in her heart twist with disgust from watching his smug satisfaction. She harbored no love for the changelings threatening her home, but Scout showed a complete lack of empathy for the beatings he was dishing out. She had only read vague theories about the mysterious evolved apes known as humans, mostly because such information was supposedly kept secret by the royal sisters. But if the first two diplomats from their world were so carefree about being violent, what did that say about the rest of their species?

When she had charged into the castle earlier in the night, by some small miracle she had encountered Princess Luna first outside the castle grounds directing her Night Guard. It had only taken them a minute for her to explain the situation, sparing most of the details and just confirming her fears.

Queen Chrysalis had returned, leading her brood up from the crystal caverns below Canterlot to try and take over the city. She had tried to subdue Luna during the early phase of the invasion, but had failed because of the unexpected intervention of the two humans Twilight was now with. The two humans Luna explained were the first of nine ambassadors from another world who were going to be touring Equestria for a year starting later in the week. By fate or fortune, two of the nine had arrived in Equestria early and had decided to spend the night with her when the attack began. The letter sent by Celestia had been in regards to that, and Luna suspected her older sister intended to have some of the ambassadors reside in Ponyville with her friends.

All of the news at once had been a lot to take in, but Twilight had managed to stay calm when she opted to infiltrate the castle alone. At first Luna had objected, but chaotic battlefield prevented her from sparing anypony to provide her with an armed escort to Celestia's room. It was both of their fears that Chrysalis would try to kidnap Celestia in the chaos of the invasion, or worse, try to steal the powers of the elder alicorn to use against her enemies.

Instead, Luna had given her a simple suggestion: find the two human ambassadors, and take them with her.

And if she couldn't find them immediately, try following the bloody pathways of beaten and broken changelings.

Well, Luna hadn't said it so bluntly. But Twilight felt a little pride that she had helped as much as the other two humans in leaving a pathway of defeated changelings on the way to Celestia's bedroom. There was no love in her heart for changelings ever since her brother's wedding, and the part of her that felt guilt from harming another living being had been put aside. When she had left Spike behind and made her mad dash to the castle it had all been been motivated by fear. But in the brief pause they were taking before they would continue on, she felt herself motivated by anger instead.

She would be the one to confront Chrysalis this night, and Chrysalis would not just be ejected from the city. Twilight didn't know what she would do, but it would be something. Something she would think of the moment she got her chance to do it. Justice would be served, by her hoof and hers alone.

Heavy shift underneath her, and he wiped the sweat off of his brow with the flame-stripped boxing gloves still over both hands. He surveyed his own work, as if he were keeping score in his head over how many changelings he had beaten over the course of the night.  "Pony, how soon until we reach control point?" he asked her, looking around the room to double-check that the changelings around them were down for good.

"Control point?" Twilight shook her head in confusion. "Do you mean Celestia's room? We need to keep going down this hall, and take the stairs all the way up to the top floor!"

"Stairs?" Heavy groaned, rolling his eyes. "Of course. Is too much to wish that giant castle has elevator."

"If you want, you can put me down now," Twilight offered. "I feel better now, really!" she took a deep breath, feeling the tiring ache of her muscles in all of her legs start to compound with the exhaustion of pouring her magic out repeatedly in such a short time. She didn't want to admit it, but Heavy carrying her around like a magic cannon on his shoulder was a lot easier than trying to keep up with Scout who had a seemingly endless amount of energy to split between running and fighting. Where and how the skinny runner was getting his vigor from was an utter mystery to her.

"Is not a problem, Heavy assures you." Heavy gave a snort like a bull, turning his nose up pridefully at her offer. "You are like mini-sentry for Heavy's shoulder. Small but deadly."

Twilight didn't know what that was, and suspected that she didn't want to know. Continuing forward, they all stopped at the intersection of the hallways with the Scout holding his hand up in the air as some signal Twilight was unfamiliar with. Heavy stopped quickly, slowly shuffling up to the corner behind the Scout to peer around the corner with Twilight doing the same.

"What is it?" Heavy whispered. Twilight leaned in closer, able to hear the sounds of many hoofsteps going by up ahead.

"More shapeshiftin’' freaks," Scout whispered back. He glanced around the corner again, and Twilight saw a grim expression of worry cross his face. The first time in the entire night, in fact. Looking for herself, she could see a line of changelings marching ahead one behind the other. After watching for a few seconds, the train of changelings continued without any signs of ending. "Dat's a lot more than we can handle, that's for sure." He glanced around the corner quickly one more time. "But they're all headin' somewhere, like, outside the castle or something. What's up with that?"

"Princess Luna is fighting outside. Maybe they need more soldiers outside to fight the guards with her?" Twilight remembered while thinking aloud.

"Heavy is not good at sneaking. But perhaps it is time that I learn."

"Yeah, you and me both brotha'. But I'm worried 'bout those stairs up to da' top floor." Scout jerked a thumb at the stairwell entrance around the corner. Twilight glanced around the corner again, and could barely even see the stairs up to the higher levels. "If we get caught in 'dere, we could get our brains beatin' in from both sides."

"Well? What do you think we should do?" Twilight felt herself growing impatient.

"I'm gonna' do what I haven't done in a loooong time," Scout pulled his track bag around, putting away his sandman and taking out another can filled with the weird green liquid Twilight had seen him drinking before. Opening it as quietly as possible, the can popped with a sharp crack and let out a slow fizzle that went unnoticed by the changelings passing ahead. "I'm goin' out ahead to scout. You two stay here until I come back, cool?"

"Da'. Good luck, little man." Heavy gave Scout a thumbs up.

Twilight watched as Scout began to chug the contents of the yellow and red can, a little off put by how fast he was drinking down the foul (vaguely cherry) smelling soda. Still with the can with his hand, Scout burst around the corner so fast that she could actually see a red and white blur streaking behind him as he ran. It reminded her of the prismatic effect Rainbow Dash's mane and tail could have when she flew by at high speeds. As quick as a bird in flight but as silent as a mouse, he ducked into the entranceway of the stairwell without the changelings further down the hall noticing him.

Watching his partner go, Heavy nodded solemnly and placed Twilight back onto the ground next to him. "Now we wait," he said, although it sounded a little like a command to her.

"Do we have to?" Twilight waited and watched, seeing no signs or sounds of a fight breaking out where the Scout had run to. "Can't we just follow behind him at a distance?"

"You are hasty. Is dangerous to run ahead alone." Heavy continued to peer around the corner. He turned back around, and waggled a massive finger at her. "Scout will return and then we go. Heavy promises."

"Fine," Twilight fumed impatiently. She forced herself to sit on her hind legs next to him, choosing to remain silent.

Together they sat side by side, hidden by the shadows of the night that twisted in and out of the royal castle. Heavy looked down at Twilight, and she looked back up at him. Neither said a word, unsure of what would happen in the future and unsure of what to say or do in the present. The small break they had happened upon by chance was being silently welcomed, and maybe both feared that anything spoken would interrupt it.

After a few minutes, Heavy broke the silence.

"So... This Princess Celestia. She is close to you, yes?"

"...Is it that obvious?" Twilight felt herself becoming self-conscious in the presence of a total stranger. She let out a weary sigh, feeling all of her worries from earlier in the evening still in her chest. "She is my teacher. She taught me everything I know about magic from when I was young. We are very...close."

"Do you live here in city? Is crazy invasion by bugs normal?"

"No, not at all. Equestria has been at peace with the rest of the world for hundreds of years. Every now and then something crazy happens, but nothing like the last two years..."

"Hundreds?" Heavy seemed impressed, the thought weighing on him. "Heavy has a hard time believing such words."

"But it's true! I mean... There have been a lot of problems lately, like Nightmare Moon and Discord, but Equestria is a very peaceful place to live."

"Nightmare Moon? Discord? Heavy is unfamiliar with such things. You will have to tell Heavy more later. This new world is interesting place to be."

"I will, but do you trust me?" Twilight asked. Ignoring the situation they were both in, it still seemed strange how friendly this giant and ferocious human was suddenly acting toward her. "We've just met, how do you know I won't lie?"

"No. You have honest eyes. Heavy can see as clear as sunny sky." The Russian heavyweight reached around at his side, unhooking the large tin box from his belt. Twilight watched as he pulled out a strange square wrapped in paper and foil, and to her surprised it turned out to be some kind of brown bar. The bar itself was segmented into pieces, almost like a box of arranged candies Bon Bon would sell at her store in Ponyville. Breaking off two pieces, he held one in his large hand to give to her.

"Here. You take, yes? Pony can eat shokalad?"

"Shoko--?" she looked at it hesitantly, taking it from him with her magic. She levitated the large brown fragment of something in front of her, before sniffing it. "Is this chocolate?" she asked, and took a hesitant nibble. On her tongue she felt a rush of sweetness, followed by a mild bitterness and something else unknown to her.

"Da," Heavy smiled, taking a large bite of his own. "Is good time for break, yes? We will not be interrupted here."

And so the two sat, both eating away at their candy while the world around them continued to rage in chaos and destruction. Around the corner changelings continued to pour steadily onward wherever they were headed, and the echoes of battle elsewhere could still be heard in the empty halls of the castle. But in the shadows where they sat there was peace. Their tiny corner of the castle, unaffected by the rest of universe. Both of them knew it wouldn't last, but neither wanted to be the one to stop the other from enjoying it. But as the saying goes, time stops for nopony...

As Twilight had finished her piece, Heavy suddenly broke the silence.

"You have never been in a war, have you?"

He watched the purple pony stare up at him, with shock in her eyes and a little chocolate still around her lips. A stare that understood, but found itself unable to answer. A stare that held so much fragile emotion because of his question, that he regretting asking.

...War?

What could she say to a question like that? The idea of war; all of the death and destruction brought about by so many different reasons was something she was only familiar with from reading books. And even then the idea of being more familiar with something that produced so much tragedy seemed... Equestria had its problems in the past and the present, but nothing that could ever be called a war. A war.

Wasn't it obvious that she had never involved herself in something so terrible!?

"No, I...I..." she stammered, caught completely off guard by his question.

The thoughts on Twilight's mind were readable on her face, and Heavy simply closed his eyes and shook his head in shame. "I am sorry," he had opened the latches to his tin lunch box, but he closed them shut once again. "But I can see  determination in your eyes. You are haunted by ghost of revenge."

"Revenge? What are you talking about?" She felt herself still in shock from his first question. "I don't--"

"Yes, revenge." Heavy looked down at Twilight very seriously, and the purple unicorn fell silent under his weighted stare. "Heavy knows. You have lived generous life, filled with loving friends and family. But also filled with responsibility and hardship. You are angry that monsters attack your home, but is more than that. You do not kill changelings when you shoot, but you are still angry and impatient. Why?"

...Why? Why? How could she possibly explain to him everything.

Everything that had happened in only one day. The suspicion. The fear. The betrayal.

"Their queen, Chrysalis," Twilight looked down at the ground and could feel her emotions threatening to overwhelm her from her memories. "She...she hurt a lot of ponies close to me. She also used her powers to trick them, during my older brother's wedding..."

"Hmm, I see." He scratched his chin and frowned. "You have been wronged by both your friends and her then, yes?"

"No!" Twilight shouted, forgetting where she was for a moment. She quickly covered her own mouth with her hooves and looked away sheepishly. "I mean, my friends didn't know. They didn't know they were being tricked. I can't--"

"What will you do when you see her?" Heavy asked, interrupting her. "Their queen. Will you kill her? Kill her to avenge your honor?"

Twilight felt her mind blank out, having been bluntly asked the question she had avoided thinking of ever since leaving the train.

Would she kill Chrysalis?

Kill her? With her own...

No! NO! Twilight stopped herself from even entertaining the thought. The past could not be fixed from deaths in the present. Princess Celestia had taught her that, over and over. And even if she hadn't, she knew well enough that problems could never be solved by recklessly taking lives for personal vendettas. There was nothing to be gained from entertaining her own idea of vigilante justice in the heat of a passion.

"I don't know what I'll do," Twilight looked back up at Heavy sternly. "But I value life; even those of my enemies."

"Hmm, very well said." Heavy rubbed his chin, thinking about her words. "Such ways are for those who are strong. Weaklings do not have choice over what is right and wrong. They must only survive. You are very strong to say such things for someone so tiny."

"Thank you?" Twilight said unsure. Her ears perked up immediately, hearing the sound of steps descending from where Scout had ran up before. Sure enough, after a few seconds the red runner appeared in the frame of the stairwell, waving a bandaged hand in the air and signaling for them to come over.

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

The delicate art of leaching of emotional energy from a target was a delicate operation for any changeling. The room for error was high since their magic could inflict mental trauma on the host when reducing them to a more docile state. A more apt comparison would be to consider the act of emotional feeding to vampirism, in that a dead or mentally deficient host would be incapable of naturally producing what changeling parasite sought. It was one of the primary reasons why changeling encounters and kidnappings over centuries had been relatively death free, often with the parasitic predators relying on surprise and cunning to subdue targets.

Even for queen Chrysalis, the challenge of probing Celestia's mind while she slept and controlling her own frustration at the solar monarch's resistance was proving to be...tiresome.

Breaking into Celestia's chambers had been easy. With the chaos of her invading forces springing up directly from the castle's bottom, the extra security to spare to protect Celestia had been diverted elsewhere. And even without using brute force to subdue the two guards at the door, it would have been easy enough for her to sneak into the bedroom through other means. Celestia was sloppy, after all. The same sloppiness that had allowed her to kidnap and replace Princess Cadance remained, and probably would until it cost the alicorn something irreplaceable in her mind.

It was hard to believe that someone who had lived so long would allow herself to be vulnerable in so many different ways, but Chrysalis chalked it up to the arrogance that accompanied immortality. Circling around Celestia's cocoon for what felt like the hundredth time, she flexed her own wings out and stretched her muscles under her exoskeleton.

Something was wrong, but she couldn't place her hoof on it.

In her mouth and in her mind, she could taste and feel the emotional energy she had drained from Celestia over the last hour. And yet when she flexed her muscles and commanded her magic, the normal spry rush of energy she should have felt was absent. There was nothing when there should have been power; raw power to be used toward anything she desired. She could still feel the fatigue from her wasted effort at capturing Luna, which proved that she was gaining something and nothing at the same time.

Looking at where she and her minions had imprisoned Celestia, Chrysalis had opted for a simplistic approach and had woven the green silk cage around her while she laid sleeping in her bed. With a careful precision she prided herself on afterward, they had managed to capture the regent of the sun without even disturbing her from her sleep. Inside of her sticky slimy prison Celestia remained looking as graceful and docile as she did when she was awake.

She couldn't argue against one less major problem of resistance to her plan, yet there was disgusting about how innocent her hated enemy was behaving.

At first she had been enthralled. Thrilled. Amazed. Even if the first part of her plan hadn't gone as expected, because of some unexpected factors, capturing Celestia with no resistance was more than enough to make up for it. With the ongoing fighting in the castle, there would be nopony to stop her from draining all of the power she needed to defeat any foe that tried to opposed her later in the night.

Not sparing a moment to gloat or break into song, she had gone to work preparing Celestia's emotional state for the maximum possible yield for her to feed on. But after an entire hour of working on the sleeping princess she felt no different from when she had started, despite her magic working as it had on countless others before her.

Something was wrong, and she still couldn't put her hoof on it.

"Your majesty, is everything alright?" one of her royal guards in the room with her asked. Chrysalis knew that all three of her remaining guards could sense her emotional frustration, since their hive-mind link to her was stronger from being groomed their entire lives to live in close proximity to her.

"No. Leave it, sergeant." Chrysalis gnashed her own teeth in frustration.

"Are you sure, your majesty? Is there anything we--"

"I said leave it be, sergeant," she ordered once more. Clever. Calm. Collected. Chrysalis forced herself to stay as cool as possible, not only for her personal guard's feelings but for her own plans as well. There was no point in getting worked up over her own failures, as shameful as they were. The entire night she had remained two steps ahead of her foes, and she intended to keep her advantage.

"Sergeant! What is that status on the swarm outside of the castle!?" Chrysalis demanded. It was a redundant question, since her mental link to her swarm allowed her sense everything even the lowest drone was experiencing. But having a second opinion incase her own mental state would affect her understanding was a safe measure to take.

The three changelings in her guard closed their eyes to concentrate.

"Your majesty, the swarm outside of the castle is still engaged with the Night Guard. There is fighting throughout many places in the castle, both small and large. However, we are unsure of what has happened to the swarm sent to where we believed the elements are being stored."

"Then it is as I thought," Chrysalis muttered. She could feel her blood boiling at the thought of the stupid grinning faces of the two humans that had interfered earlier. "No doubt those two filthy apes are being used to further foil my plans."

"We are unable to track them because of how scattered our forces are. What are your orders for the survivors outside of the elements hall?"

"Have them regroup outside with those not in combat with the Night Guard," she ordered. "Those that can should try to find a way outside of the castle. Those who are too injured should accept the hospitality of our enemies, since we will find ways to sneak them out of the castle."

"Understood, your majesty."

"And sergeant?" Chrysalis cast a small glance at her personal guards, before looking out into the moonlit sky away from them. She didn't want to see how they would react to what she had to say next. "You three will join the battle outside of the castle. Be sure to do as much as possible to help our injured soldiers escape from the castle's interior when they arrive."

"What!? B-but, your majesty! It would be unthinkable to leave you alone at a time like this!"

"I am aware of the dangers, sergeant." Chrysalis looked at her personal guards with touched concern. Feigned or not, it mattered little. The concern in their eyes was genuine. "Now go! Your queen orders you into battle!"

"...Yes! At once, your majesty!"

It only took those four words strung together to motivate them, and she knew it. Was it instinct for them to obey the orders of their queen? The result of subtle yet gradual changes to their mentality and physiology over the last one thousand years? She could have ordered them to jump into an active volcano, and although they would have hesitated at first, she had no doubt that they would have done so. Even if there was only a slight chance at salvaging the situation, she would have to take it. She owed it to them at this point.

The death of two of her strongest guards had been the price paid for her failure to predict the unpredictable. The time and effort taken to train common soldiers to utilize powers meant only for royalty, gone in an instant. Now with Celestia resisting her efforts to drain her power (in her sleep no less), anything further would prolong the inevitable. Slowly pulling back from the battlefield would guarantee that her brood would live to fight another day, since the Night Guard would be too concerned about their own welfare to pursue.

But she would not be leading them. No changeling queen had ever lived after failing her brood twice.

It was for the better, really. She was no so arrogant to think that the swarm's flexibility excluded herself. Every member of the changeling swarm was replaceable. Every member. The swarm had survived centuries of being hunted because of its flexibility; its ability to adapt and its refusal to tolerate useless sentimentality for things that held it back.

Staring into the stars with a wistful emptiness that betrayed her reality, she wondered what her successor would be like. Would she choose a different path than hers? Chrysalis had had the luxury of being raised in a hive by a queen in search of a successor. She had spent her youth looking down at the hive, knowing the brood would eventually be hers to lead. Would her successor be able to say the same? Or would it be a battle between candidate queens, as had been normal in the past? Perhaps if she had been forced to live a harder life in her youth, her failures in the present wouldn't have happened.

Perhaps if she hadn't been raised with so much emotion. With so much spoiled care, and with so many stories about the injustices toward her kind. Stories passed down for generations, with the dual purpose of instilling motivation and responsibility in changelings of higher breeding.

Yes, caring was her downfall. She was too passionate. Too passionate about seeing justice done...

Justice that would soon be dead forever. She had no illusions about the reason what Celestia would have Princess Luna and Princess Cadance do in the future: expanding her wealth and influence of the Equestrian Empire outward across the globe. It was no coincidence in such a short time that the number of immortal rulers in Equestria had tripled, with a suspected fourth in progress.

Celestia had moved first against the world, and she had been forced to react.

If the Dragons, Griffins, Diamond Dogs, and other creatures in the world would not object, it would be known that at least she had seen Celestia's altruism for what it truly was. The preachings of harmony and tolerance from a hypocrite who ruled atop a throne of lies and deceit. Or maybe the truth was something more depressing. Maybe Celestia was delusional over her own position. Maybe her inability to fix the flaws in her credences and governance was because she was completely unaware of them.

"How utterly depressing," Chrysalis muttered, walking back over to Celestia's prison and looking into the cocoon. "This all happened because of you. Even in your sleep, I detest you," she whispered. Baring her fangs, she ran them hungrily across the smooth shell of the cocoon. "If I cannot take your magic from you, than I will take as many of your little ponies as I can before I go..."

Before she could finish, the doors to Celestia's bedroom were flung open with enough force to knock them off of their hinges. Screeching to a halt from her mad dash, Twilight Sparkle's eyes locked onto Chrysalis with Scout and Heavy trailing behind her.

"GET AWAY FROM HER, YOU MONSTER!!!" Twilight screamed.

"Hmph, Twilight Sparkle." Chrysalis didn't flinch at all. She whimsically glanced into the clear shell of the cocoon that held Celestia, disgusted at how the solar monarch was still sleeping soundly. "How fitting that Celestia's pet would sniff me out first."

The ends of Twilight's mane rose on their own from the glow of her magic. She could feel of the arcane power she had practiced over the years flowing from her horn down to her hooves. Around her in the room, furniture and smaller dressings began to shake from the power of the element of magic. This monster before her would pay! Pay for brainwashing her brother! Pay for lying and deceiving everyone close to her! And PAY for hurting Princess Celestia!

Finally catching up to Twilight, Scout and Heavy barged into the room to see the purple unicorn giving off more sparks and static than a defective cow mangler 5000. Both mercenaries looked at each other, understanding the situation in an instant. Without a word, they both jumped over Twilight and landed with a thump in front of her.

"You and me lady," Scout pointed his sandman at Chrysalis. "Let's do this."

"There is no honor in fighting weaklings." Heavy cracked the knuckles of both his massive hands. "But what do bugs know of honor? Put up fists. We fight like men."

"What!? No!" Twilight shouted at both mercenaries, trying to push past them. "She's mine to fight! Get out of my way!"

"As if I fear you imbeciles," Chrysalis ignored Twilight's squawking, and flared her insectile wings out. Her gnarled and crooked horn began glowing with magic. "I will not be denied my revenge tonight! Celestia shall pay for her hypocrisy against my kind!"

To any observer watching, the scene in front of them perfectly captured the tense moment before an all out brawl would break out. Scout and Heavy took a step apart, giving Twilight behind them a clear line of sight to take a shot at Chrysalis. Neither knew if the changeling queen could fight multiple enemies at once, and were trying to plan out ways fight that could divide her attention to overwhelm her. Chrysalis herself could see that Twilight's own magic was aimed right at her from behind the two humans, and she readied her own plan to deal with all three problems once and for all. No one dared move, all knowing that the first strike by anypony would decide how everything else went down.

But before anyone could act, a voice spoke out from the open balcony.

"Zat' is quite enough, all of you. Before you make fools out of yourselves, I would like to have a chat with her majesty."

Everyone watched as the Spy slowly appeared out of thin air, the cloaking field powered by his invisiwatch turning off and causing the moonlight to bend around him. From underneath his dashin hashashin cowl, a thin vapor of smoke rose from the burning tip of a cigarette held tight in his lips. Both of his hands were wrapped around the grips of his ambassador, the barrel of the massive revolver trained on Chrysalis' forehead.

Another human? Who is that? Twilight looked up and both Scout and Heavy, to see both of them had lowered their weapons. Wait, what's going on!?

"Oh? And where did you come from?" Chrysalis asked what Twilight was thinking, turning to the Spy with her eyes glimmering in amusement. Was it this human that the other two had referred to earlier?  "You said you have business with me?"

"Indeed." Spy moved his lips, pushing his cigarette to the corner of his mouth so he could speak freely. Slowly so all could follow and see, he took his right hand off of the base of his ambassador. With a flick of his wrist, a small book slipped out from the sleeve of his pinstripe suit into his free hand. With impressive dexterity he opened it and began going through the pages, still holding his ambassador leveled at the changeling queen. "Queen Chrysalis, the current brood mother of the Carpenter Brood. Known for their ability to cover large areas of land and turn them into dens for reproduction in short amounts of time. Over 'ze last ten years your brood has been sighted moving from location to location in 'ze south, never engaging in open hostilities ‘vith any nation or government."

Spy took a moment to turn the a page in the book with a finger, his eyes going back and forth to everyone in the room.

"It was assumed that your brood was mostly concerned vith self-preservation and survival," he continued. "But your attack on Canterlot was a surprise to many, since it was 'ze first time your brood had ever attempted to fight in a heavily populated area."

Spy closed the book in his palm, and slipped it into his back pocket. He then put his free hand back underneath the grip of his ambassador. "I suppose you know where I am going with 'zis. Ze' question of 'ze hour is why?"

"I answer your question with a question," Chrysalis said, inching even closer to Celestia's cocoon. "Why are you fighting me? Why did you kill my children tonight? Is it true that Celestia hired you?"

"Yes. For promised riches and rewards," Spy answered before either Scout or Heavy could. "Nothing more, and nothing less."

"For money? You would take lives for something so petty?" Chrysalis gave a rueful laugh of laced with indignity. "I see. Celestia's hypocrisy knows no bounds. To sit on her throne and preach altruism, and then hire killers with her wealth to do her dirty work. I should have known from the start."

Hire killers? Twilight looked in confusion at the Scout and Heavy, remembering what Luna had told her before. What is she talking about?

"Perhaps," Spy answered neutrally. "But I am more interested in you, your majesty. Tell me 'ze reason why you fight."

"The reason why we fight?" Chrysalis looked at Spy with an incredulous look. "Why would you care about something like that? Am I not a monster to you? Some mindless animal to hunt and kill for sport!?"

"Not at all." Spy shook his head. "But as I said, 'ze past history of your kind shows 'zat you have a disinterest in violent confrontations. I find it strange that you would, not once but twice, purposefully attack a heavily populated area 'zat would likely resist your efforts."

Without warning, out from the same sleeve Spy slipped a small metallic pistol into his hand. Scout and Heavy both recognized it as a sleeping-dart pistol, a tool that Mann Co. had stopped producing a very long time ago. In an instant the pistol was flipped around into the Spy's palm, where he then fired a tart from it that flew between both RED mercenaries...

...right into Twilight's neck.

"Owch!" Twilight yelped, jumping back in shock. She turned her neck gingerly, seeing the small red feathered tail of the dart still sticking in her. "Hey! What was that for!? Who do you...think...you... Ooooh."

Twilight swayed in place, feeling a wave of exhaustion hit her system as the world began to spin. Her words continued to slur with her eyelids drooping, and after a few more seconds of incoherent rambling Heavy turned and caught the unicorn with his hands before she collapsed. Under the influence of the powerful knockout drug, she breathed peacefully with no signs of the intense rage she had shown only moments ago. Spy looked to Heavy who gave a confirming nod, and proceeded to pick her up to take out of the room.

"Now then," Spy dropped his cigarette onto the floor and stomped the ashes out. "We wouldn't want to be interrupted by an overly emotional child, yes? Why don't you start from 'ze beginning, your majesty."

"Yes, we would like to hear this as well."

Princess Luna strode into Celestia's chambers passing by Heavy and Twilight, the scars of battle apparent over her armor and body. Still maintaining an air of regality, she marched forward and took silent note of the situation. Chrysalis hunched herself over Celestia's cocoon, her horn glowing threateningly with her magic. But Luna calmly held up her hoof to show her intentions, not that of the same monarch who had tried to smite her earlier.

"We have our own grudges with our elder sister from the past, as perhaps you've heard. We would like to hear for ourselves about your claims."

Chrysalis looked around, unsure of what to say or do next. Compassion was the last thing she had expected from her enemies, after the vicious reception she had gotten earlier. From Twilight's sudden entrance she hadn't had the chance to steel her nerves over the inevitable, and a part of her suspected it was all a ruse to try and get her to lower her guard. The two apes that had surrounded her were mercenaries, and maybe they were reconsidering their agreements? And what of Luna? For someone who had been involved in the fight for the castle, how could she be so calm about speaking her? Hadn't she tried to utterly destroy her over a few words only an hour ago? Yet, if talking could stall any of them from reentering the fighting outside, it would mean more changelings could escape...

"Well? Come now, I don't have all evening." Spy was still pointing his weapon at her. Princess Luna sat on her hind legs, and Scout pulled up a chair to sit on.

"Very well, since you all insist." Chrysalis looked outside once again at the full moon reflecting the sun through the open balcony of the bedroom. The stars above glittered ominously, almost if they too were waiting to hear what she had to say. "Allow me to tell you the truth about the monsters you call Changelings!"

Chapter 6: KotH Canterlot (Part 3)

Cloud Skipper thrust his enchanted lance forward, electrocuting a changeling that had been occupied with something else that should have been him. With a bright flash his opponent collapsed onto the floor, and he lifted his weapon back up into his forearms to find another target. His golden armor rattled loudly as he sprung up into the air, bringing his lance down on another changeling in combat with another of his fellow guards.

The attack on the royal castle was entering its final stages, now that the Day Guard had been woken up from their barracks and joined the fighting in and outside the castle. Morbidly he wondered, Celestia forbid, if anypony had been killed from the slow response of the Day Guard to the invasion. The first signs of fighting in the castle had probably been mistaken by outside sentries as some of the Night Guards having fun while on duty. As time had passed fighting had started to become increasingly vicious, as the changelings began to realize that they were being beaten back by inferior numbers of royal guard ponies.

Across from him a bat-pony with green eyes (who he vaguely remembered being named Jasmine) dove at a changeling with her enchanted hoof-claws, stabbing through the carapace of her victim. Without any response to her target's cries of pain and attempts to drive her off, she thrust her other foreleg into the side of its head killing it instantly. With a grim satisfaction she pulled her claws out from its body, and licked the dripping sweat off of her face.

Cloud Skipper felt his heart skip a beat from watching the last living moments of one of his enemies. The weapons of the Day Guard could easily be used to deal out death, but he had seen many of his fellow soldiers going about with the extra care to avoid killing the identical invaders. The Night Guard however seemed to have no such reserves. Was Midnight Blossom out there doing the same? Should he be as well?

"TAKE THAT!"

Snapping out his thoughts, Cloud Skipper looked around. From the hallway where the changelings were coming from, he could see something or somepony shouting. He blinked twice, squinting to see in the darkness of the poorly lit castle.

From a distance he could see changelings being tossed into the air like rag dolls, taken completely by surprise by somepony or something headed his way.

"AND THIS!"

Next to him Jasmine stopped too. She brushed her jet-black mane out from her eyes, carefully making sure not to accidentally shock herself with the clawed-gauntlets worn over her foreleg hooves. She had heard somepony shouting, but had chalked it up to the chaos of a battlefield. Then she noticed the Day Guard pony (Cloud Skipper, was it?) next to her was staring in curiosity too, and she stopped to look and see as well.

"AND THAT!"

Cloud Skipper felt his jaw drop, as something that looked like a BIG and BALD ape in boots was barreling toward him. The bi-pedal creature was swinging his arms like a windmill, throwing out punches left and right with his massive fists that knocked aside anything in front of him path like a wrecking ball. Instinctively he raised his lance, but then realized that the weird creature was beating up any changeling that crossed his path while not hurting any of the guard ponies he ran past. He looked at Jasmine next to him, who had an equal look of surprise and confusion on her face.

"AND THIS! RRRR!"

Heavy stopped right in front of Cloud Skipper, and the Day Guard pony looked up to him with wide eyes. The large creature dressed in red with a vest and pants was easily four times his height, and the muscles all over his body looked strong enough to snap him in two. Now that he was closer, he could see that he was carrying something on his shoulder. Something that looked like...a pony!? And not just any pony, but Princess Celestia's private student Twilight Sparkle!

He watched Jasmine swiftly get behind the bald ape, ready to launch an attack if the human tried to do anything threatening. Mustering his courage, he pointed his lance up at the strange creature in a threatening manner.

"W-what..." Cloud Skipper could barely speak. He swallowed and tried again. "W-what... Who are y-you! W-what are you d-doing with that p-p-pony!"

Surveying his work behind him, Heavy looked down at the white Day Guard soldier who looked as if he was about to relieve himself. He hadn't even noticed the teeny tiny guardpony, and had been wondering if he was any closer to the place where Luna had asked him to put Twilight after passing her in the hall. Noting that he was being threatened, he let out a loud laugh in spite of the situation.

"You," Heavy said, looking down at Cloud Chaser intimidatingly.

"Me?" Cloud Skipper squeaked, feeling any courage he left leave his body.

"Yes, you. You take. Now." Heavy ordered. Reaching around he lifted Twilight off of his shoulder and laid her down gently onto the floor. Cloud Skipper and Jasmine both looked to see that she was sleeping soundly, despite everything that was happening around her.

"You must put in bed and guard. Princess Luna orders you. Now Heavy must go. Heavy's people need him."

Without another word the massive human turned around and began to run back from where he came, almost stepping on Jasmine as he went. But not before punching a changeling in the snout that was trying to climb in from a nearby window. Another tried to attack him as he ran, but he caught it around its neck with his hand and threw it down onto the ground with a resounding smack.

"Woah," Jasmine whispered next to him still in awe. "Did you see that?"

Cloud Skipper blinked his blue eyes, unable to think of the words.

If Midnight Blossom were here, she'd never believe this...

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

"We were lied to by Princess Platinum then! How can you blame everypony in our kingdom for her lies hundreds of years later!?"

"We were hunted down and murdered! How can you claim that it is our responsibility to move on!?"

Spy remained silent, listening to Princess Luna and Queen Chrysalis debate back and forth vocally. At first the blue princess had remained silent listening to the (unexpectedly) detailed story of the green queen with a very passionate interested. But as more insults began to be included into the story she hadn't remained silent, and now a fierce debate between the two had started over the responsibilities unfulfilled in the past.

If he understood correctly, minus some glaring obvious embellishments on Chrysalis' part, changelings existed in Equestria before the official formation of the Equestrian monarchy. Some individual by the name of Princess Platinum had relied on changelings in the far past for their abilities, apparently for acts of sabotage, kidnapping, and even murder against the other two native tribes in the region. In return for their services the changelings had been promised a place to live in unicorn territory, and eventual incorporation and acceptance into their culture.

But with the sudden signing of a unification pact between all three tribes to form a unified Equestria, their employer had turned around and outed the insectile-equines as saboteurs trying to sully her kingdom's image. Despite having evidence to the contrary, Chrysalis claimed that Celestia allowed for hunts of changelings to occur in return for the continued cooperation and loyalty of unicorns in Princess Platinum's court. This forced the changelings to leave their native homeland, and living in chaos infected lands had mutated them into what they were today.

A logical tale, Spy had to admit.

As the saying went: the most dangerous wolf is not one in sheep's clothing, but the one that convinces the farmer that it is a dog.

Not that it was going to matter in a minute.

"WAIT! Both of you, hold 'zat thought!" Spy shouted. Both monarchs stopped, staring at him indignantly for his untimely interruption.

Fished around into his pocket, he pulled out his folded butterfly knife. In a smooth motion he tossed it to the Scout, who caught it easily. Taking a moment to slip another cigarette from his disguise kit, he adjusted his tie too before taking a breath.

"Now then, back to work. Heavy?"

Luna and Scout both turned in surprise, to find that Heavy had returned and was standing in the doorway of the room. The giant man crouched down, arching himself and flexing the fingers on his right hand. Chrysalis let out a defensive hiss and spread herself over Celestia's prison, knowing that something was coming. Luna looked at the giant human puzzled at his strange pose, and noticed just in time that Scout had dived out of the way. Without warning Heavy threw his right arm forward, with both of his pointer and middle fingers together in the shape of a gun.

"POW! Haha!"

Diving away Luna could feel a tremendous force pass by her, unseen and invisible like wind. She watched something unseen slam into Chrysalis, knocking her away from the cocoon holding her sister and out the open balcony window over the Spy.

Watching the changeling queen fly past like a rag-doll, the Spy turned back to a shocked princess and smirked.

"My apologies your majesty, but I will be taking Chrysalis for myself. You are out of your depth."

Without hesitation, the handsome rogue turned around and leap from the balcony after the changeling queen.

"...What."

Luna picked herself up off of the floor and stared at where the assassin had leapt, suddenly remembering that his race was incapable of flight. After his cheap insult, had he really turned and leap off the balcony after Chrysalis? Off a balcony with several hundred feet between him and the ground!?

She turned and looked back at the Heavy and Scout, both of whom seemed to not care. Did they realize what their comrade had done!? She opened her mouth to say something, but found herself speechless.

"Don't think too much about it sis," Scout said, noticing the look on her face. He leaned back in the chair he was in, and then kicked his feet up in the air. "Spy pulls crap like 'dat all the time. We just let 'em do what he wants."

"Da'," Heavy agreed. "Spy is like mystery. Heavy understands concern, but Spy is best to leave alone."

"And don't worry about queenie, Spy will take care of her." Scout unfolded the Spy's butterfly knife, twirling it around in his hand and dropping to the floor clumsily when he almost caught his own fingers against the blade. "Owch! Geez...how da' hell does he do this?"

Luna looked at both mercenaries and back to where Spy had jumped again.

"...What."

The strangest thing about most of Team Fortress Industry's product line was their capability to bend time, space, and physics for the individual using them. The Spy had gone through great lengths in the past to test the limits of his dead ringer timepiece, and found that the hand-held device was capable of blocking incredible impacts that would normally kill a human. Even the word kill was putting it lightly, since he had survived direct hits from laser shots, rockets, large caliber bullets, and grenades that would completely disintegrate any unsuspecting fool.

Nothing less from a group of muscle-headed super humans mutated by a mythical radical transformative element. Humans who chose their king by successive matches of boxing kangaroos. It was amazing to think that something as incredible as the dead ringer and invisi-watch were made by people who thought a giant camera mounted in the middle of a fake beard could work as an effective Canadian disguise.

Although the portable baccarat detector had potential, if they shrunk it down some day...

Rapidly approaching the ground at near terminal velocity, the Spy held out his dead ringer in his hand after putting his ambassador away. Flipping open the front cover of the device, he held it firmly just as he had done in the past and waited for the impact that would kill him.

Like so many times before, he hit the ground with a pulverizing splat.

In an instant the dead ringer absorbed the impact of the fall, keeping the Spy alive and throwing out a holographic corpse that actually bounced from the sheer velocity he had impacted the ground. The dead ringer also cloaked him in its invisibility field, effectively giving the illusion that he had fallen to his death after jumping from the balcony above. More than a few times in the past Spy had used this illusion to create a distraction for his teammates, since the dead corpse of an enemy Spy  randomly falling from the sky would distract anyone who had the brains to notice.

To Chrysalis who had managed to land after be ejected from Celestia's room, the sudden SPLAT of Spy's body hitting the pavement near her was a shocking surprise. She stood in a stunned silence, looking at the stiff body of one of her enemies that had been threatening her life only a minute ago. Like a curious child, she looked around for something on the ground near her to prod at the body with.

Still cloaked in his dead ringer's invisibility field, he chuckled to himself mirthfully. It was always amusing seeing the reaction of someone who hadn't seen his dead ringer device before.

Although that reaction never lasted since the same person would have a knife in the back of their skull seconds after.

"Did you forget about me?" Spy walked around, slipping his dead ringer into his inner suit pocket and walking around behind where Chrysalis was still poking at his fake body. The changeling queen nearly jumped out of her carapace, looking behind herself in shock and whirling around to see the masked human appear out of thin air as he had when first introducing himself.

"What did you do!?" she demanded. She looked back at the fake corpse of the dead ringer, and at him in front of her that seemed perfectly normal except for some dirt and dust on his suit. "How did you survive that fall!? What kind of magic do you humans have!?"

"Magic? Oh hohoho," he laughed haughtily at the thought. The technology fueled by australium would certainly seem like magic to anyone not the wiser, and in a world like Equestria (from what he had read) similar effects from magic were probably possible. "Don't make me laugh. Humans are not capable of performing feats of magic."

"Liar! How can it be!? How could you just die and come back to life like that!" Chrysalis screamed furiously, racking her mind and unable to think of an explanation. "What kind of monsters are you!?"

"Monsters?" Spy repeated, laughing again and enjoying the changeling queen's delicious word choice. "Indeed. We are your worst nightmares for your kind, your majesty. You must have been born under a very unlucky star for all of 'zis to happen."

"Silence! Don't you DARE look down on me!" she screamed at him again. "You have no idea what my kind has gone through for this day!"

"I can only imagine what a traumatic past your kind has suffered," he said with mock concern, rolling his eyes and recalling her cheap tale from before. "But your majesty, you have no idea what we have gone through to become who we are. Now, can't we both be mature about 'zis and let me kill you already?"

He flashed her a warm smile.

"Promise not to bleed on my suit, and I will kill you quick."

Without warning Spy slipped another pair of object from his sleeves and threw them at Chrysalis with incredible speed. But her reaction was just as fast, and the two conniver's kunais thrown at her deflected off of a green magic barrier with two loud thuds. He scowled in aggravation despite himself; his first attempt at a sneak attack thwarted by reflexes just as good as his own. Perhaps his short retirement had affected his performance more than he had accounted for.

Not wasting another second, he threw another pair of kunais out only for them to be deflected in the air by Chrysalis' magic mid flight. An impressive display, and the Spy was reminded of how the Sniper had once managed to shoot down a rocket launched by an enemy Soldier with his huntsman. Even if he outmatched Chrysalis in many ways, the changeling queen could be very dangerous for someone like himself who relied on many psychological factors to get his work done quickly. It wasn't as if she was just going to let him run up and stab her.

Yes, smashing this cockroach would take a different approach...

"I don't understand it! How can you fight for them when you have NOTHING in common!?" she continued to scream at him, still holding her magic shield up to ward off future blows. "Celestia would be REPULSED by humans like you! Disgusted! Doesn't she see her own hypocrisy in letting you do her dirty work!?"

"But of course," Spy agreed, but remained unmoved from a position to quickly draw his ambassador revolver. "It is hypocritical. Unfairly so, to a caliber 'zat only exists in literature and theater. But 'zat is what happens when a being hits a wall 'zey cannot climb over."

"Wall!? What are you talking about!? Celestia has everything she's ever wished for! And her subjects give her anything she asks!"

"You do not see how 'zis was all your doing?" He stopped for a moment, purposefully letting his words sink into her mind. From where he stood, Spy could see Chrysalis trying to think of an answer to what he was hinting to. "Allow me to explain 'zen. You and your kind did 'ze worst possible thing by attacking Canterlot and almost having your moment of triumph."

Spy forced himself to frown, pretending as if he took no pleasure having the changeling queen following his every word. By forcing her to rethink her greatest failure under duress, he would be one step closer to having her right where he wanted her. Add in a touch of respect and fake sympathy, and she would keep feeding on everything out of his mouth.

"Do you still not understand? Your majesty, by coming so close to victory you re-instilled fear into her. Fear into a creature 'zat believed everything in her world was under her control. And we all know what fear can do to living creatures, yes?"

Stew in your mess you abomination. Just a little more, and nothing will save you.

"Did you not think it possible 'zat Celestia would take desperate measures? 'Zat she would be willing to violate some of her own principles, in 'ze hope of security she could not gain by herself?"

"Y-you can't be serious!" Chrysalis stammered. She was finally beginning to see the bigger picture of what was happening in front of her. How she had fallen unwittingly in a trap that Celestia hadn't even intended to spring on her. She was being used! No, they were BOTH being used! How could she have ever imagined that--!!!

"Fine! What is it she's paying you!? I can double it! No, TRIPLE it if you let me take over Canterlot!"

"We are not after something so trivial 'zat you would ever be able to give it to us. And besides, there is something honorable about loyalty to one's employer, yes?"

"But you said you don't care about her! You're all just in this for yourselves!"

"Correct," Spy said, grinning wickedly like a cat with a mouse in its mouth. "But I like to believe 'zat I am performing a civil service to 'zis world by killing your filthy kind off. Or perhaps it is more of an act of mercy, since we will ensure 'zat no changeling will ever have to be burdened by your hopeless quest for justice."

"What are you saying!? Y-you would--!!" Chrysalis stammered again, this time out of shock. Was he implying that...that...

"Hohoho, oui. But I have some merciful bones left in my body, your majesty." Spy stopped suddenly, and turned his back to her. He continued to grin at her wickedly out of the corner of his eyes, tempting her to strike him.

"How about 'zis? Go ahead and run. Run away into 'ze night! Go like a quick little bunny, because we will be coming for you soon..."

Chrysalis hesitated, torn between a chance to destroy a true foe to her kind and saving her brood from its destruction. It didn't matter that her enemies had twice shown their backs to her, in a purposeful display of intolerable arrogance. Was it really possible that this well-dressed monster would come to fulfill his threats? The magic he had shown earlier was proof enough that he would not die from conventional means. She had been out of communication with her swarm scattered around the castle, and it was possible that they were winning over the Night Guard. But the opposite was true as well, which meant that it was even more important for her to run from this fight to lead them to safety.

What she needed was time.

Time to get reorganized. Time to get her sergeants lead her swarm to safety.

Time to find out more about her new enigmatic enemies.

Without wasting another moment, Chrysalis released her wings and took off into the air. A dull buzz filled the air, as she flew off farther and farther from where Spy stood.

Watching her go, he wondered silently if she was really as stupid as he hoped she was going to be. But perhaps stupid was an unfair way to put it, after all, he had made his own fair share of bad decisions when under pressure. Trying to backstab a giant Pyro-bot was one example that came to mind...

Amongst other embarrassing incidents that no one would ever hear about. Ever.

Spy fished around into his suit and back and forth between his inner jacket pockets. Pulling out his dead ringer once more, he opened up the front cover and held down the top button with his thumb.

"Tavish, are you there? Come in, Demoman. I repeat, come in Demoman."

He waited for a moment, taking his thumb off of the top the dead ringer and waiting for an answer.

"Eh? Ah... How does this wee thingamajig work again? Spy? Spy! SPY!!! ...Spy? Is that you? Eh?"

Spy ran his palm over his face at his one-eyed comrades idiocy. Relying on Tavish Degroot, known as the Demoman for his proficiency in all things explosive, was like a bad game of roulette. Because of issues pertaining to his life before joining RED, the team demolitions expert had a nasty habit of working on the job completely smashed. As a result, every other day the RED Demoman fluctuated between a belligerent drunkard with a sword and a flawless professional. He silently prayed that the one-eyed scotsman was the right balance between sober and drunk tonight, otherwise there would be more at stake than luring all of the changelings in Canterlot to their deaths.

"Focus, you drunken wretch! Did you set up your sticky trap like I told you to? Only along certain caverns! We could damage the mountain holding the city up if you scre--"

"Haha, don't worry lad. I had my good eye on all of it the entire time. We'll be burying what's left of them in soup cans!"

Spy smiled a wicked smirk, and looked to the night sky to see if he could still see Chrysalis flying. Looking around the gardens of the court yard he was in, he wondered for a little if either alicorn princesses were fond of ice sculptures.

"Excellent. Come back to the castle, Demo. We should celebrate with a drink or two."

"Cheers to that, mate! Time to get bluttered!"

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

Twilight Sparkle let out a small groan, rolling over in the sheets that covered her. They were warm and comfortable, and she struggled to pull them tighter around herself. The strange fog that had clouded her mind from the knockout dart was slowly beginning to wear off, but the comfort of her bedding threaten to push her back into the dream realm once more. In her haze she could feel somepony stroking her mane gently, and she smiled from the gentle touch of her unknown caretaker.

"Mmrrm," she rolled over again. "Oh, no. I can't fit another volume..."

Continuing to stroke Twilight's mane, Luna looked down in envy at how the unicorn under her sheets seemed to be dreaming in peace. Although the larger human had volunteered to continue guarding her, she considered leaving Twilight vulnerable and alone while she slept unacceptable. Her guards would have to fight on their own for the remainder of the evening, along with the one called Scout who had run off without a word.

Yes, guarding Twilight would be a nice distraction. Enough to keep her mind wandering about the terrible truths that may or may not have been true in Chrysalis' tale. Everypony knew (disregarding those who pretended otherwise) that the leaders of each tribe had each committed a fair share of deceitful and dishonorable deeds against one another. Part of the founding of Equestria had guaranteed pardons for criminal actions taken before its founding, but for only the highest members of each tribe's court.

But to think that one of the three tribal leaders had manipulated Equestria's laws to cover up her dirty past...

And even worse, that her older sister had accepted it in return for continued support of her throne...

"Tiny pony is still asleep?"

Heavy's question interrupted her thoughts. He had asked her with a ginger and gentle concern that it almost made her laugh, given everything about him that seemed incapable of such sensitivity. She nodded at him and slowly got off her own bed.

"She is sleeping soundly. We are a little envious," Luna said, sliding off her own bed as quietly as possible so as to not disturb her.

"Is good. Tiny pony should not have to fight in such big battle. Is best left to much bigger men."

"Mares are perfectly capable of fighting for themselves, mister Heavy." She felt the need to object to his statement. There was something about how the larger human spoke that was strange; everything was judged by either being big or small, and retained good or bad qualities because of it. It was even strange to listen to, and she wondered how much of it was because of the clear language barrier.

"Yes, Heavy does not deny that." He nodded sympathetically. "Many brave and strong women fought in defense of motherland in great patriotic war. But Heavy does not wish war on anyone who is so small. Heavy feels that part of being big and strong is caring for those who are not."

"We agree. Very wise words, mister Heavy," she said, drifting into her own thoughts.

Nine. There were a total of nine humans in the group Reliable Excavation and Demolition had created into a team to do the bidding of Redmond Mann. Anything else was a complete mystery to her. In the company of her older sister during the day she had been able to briefly glimpse at the different profiles of all nine mercenaries, taking note of their oddities and differences. But the information on each of their dossiers had hardly covered the...uniqueness...each mercenary seemed to possess when compared to another. The three she had met so far were a wise-cracking and hyperactive youth, an older and MUCH larger male of great strength, and an enigmatic hooded assassin that seemed to have a silver tongue as sharp as his blades.

Far from the usual line of mercenaries she had seen through Equestria's history. Nothing at all like the sell-swords of the past, and renegade soldiers who had once roamed the countryside committing acts of banditry and extortion. They seemed to be quite the opposite in fact; there was a clear pride all three took in themselves for being who they were.

She wanted to know more. Much, much more.

"Mister Heavy, could you tell us more about yourself?" she decided to ask directly with a tone of innocent inquiry.

"Hmm? There is not much to tell," he said, reaching over and into his lunchbox and taking out his half-eaten sandvich. "Heavy is mercenary of RED team. This is Heavy's sandvich. Heavy likes to eat his sandvich."

"But what else?" she pressed. "We are sure there are a lot of things that happened to make you who you are."

"No, there is not much to tell." Heavy took a bite out of his sandvich. "Oh! And Sasha is my favorite gun. Heavy likes to shoot his gun. Is all you need to know."

"Really? Surely you jest with us. Is there nothing else to who you are?"

"Yes. There is not much else; I have gun, and I like to shoot gun. Is all you need to know."

Luna visibly frowned and went back to focusing her attention on Twilight. She hadn't expected the larger human to suddenly clam up about himself, consider the other two mercenaries didn't seem to have an issue with boasting about themselves. Had she said something wrong, or had he done something in the past that he regretted? Was his former life filled with terrors and tragedy that caused him to take up such a dangerous profession? Was there some horrendous crime committed that would put his position as a mercenary in jeopardy? Or was it as simple as the human not wanting to talk during his snack break?

Perhaps it was time to try a different approach...

"Mister Heavy? May we...ask you a personal question about ourselves?"

He looked up at her, and took the last bite out of his sandvich. Reaching around into his back pocket, he wiped his mouth daintily with a red rag before putting it away into his lunch box in his lap. Taking a moment to fish around in his lunch box, he lifted out a small red thermos before closing it again.

"Da'," was all he said simply.

She turned her gaze away, looking back down at Twilight.

"A thousand years ago... We... No, a monster attacked our fair kingdom in jealousy of the adoration our older sister received from our subjects. The monster was banished to the moon, and remained imprisoned there until very recently. Do you think it...it... We mean... Do you think that the monster deserves a second chance to be good?"

Luna let out a pitiful shutter, taking deep calming breaths to try and forcibly relax herself. The last thing she wanted was to seem like she wanted his pity. The unexpected rush of her own emotions that had come up when she tried retelling her past shocked her, and she had almost broken down before she had gotten to the ending question. Mentally she struck herself, disgusted at her immature control over her own emotions.

Still sitting silently, Heavy stroked the stubble on his face and frowned across his large blocky chin.

"Hmm... Heavy has always said 'fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, and I kill you.' But, is not so simple."

Reaching into his front vest pocket, he pulled out a small stitched doll that appeared to be dressed in a larger white overcoat. Holding it out to her, Luna took it from him with her magic and looked the small toy over. The doll was tiny, so tiny in fact that it fit perfectly in the front breast pocket of his vest that he wore over his uniform. All the while they had been together, she hadn't even noticed it there. She stroked the doll gently with her hoof, and could feel how old and worn the skin of the doll was.

"Heavy's best friend on team is our doktor. Doktor Medic. Before RED team, Medic's people went to war with Heavy's people. The war was long and violent, and many many people were killed. But Medic is still friend of Heavy, and we look out for each other on battlefield."

"So, you would forgive her then?" Luna tapped her hooves together nervously, a little off-put.

"Of course! World is never so simple." Heavy laughed loudly, slapping his the palm of his hand onto his knee. "Worlds are big! So big that everyone make mistakes. Heavy has doctorates in Russian literature, but does not need education to know that. Only small and stupid men believe that they can know everything. Is like old saying of frog that lives in pond, and knows nothing of great oceans."

"Take queen of changelings," he continued, his mood suddenly changing. "Heavy can understand revenge. Heavy has gotten revenge many MANY times. But there is no revenge against those who are dead. What could she gain from attacking castle today? Only more bigger problems. Is not right that children are burdened with avenging dead. Is wrong to live and pretend past did not happen, but she ruins present to dig up past. Heavy thinks that changeling queen is very sad person. She is burdened too by ghost of revenge, which haunts her from grave and tells her how to live life and lead people. She is slave to enemy who is not even alive. Heavy has seen this before, and there is only one way to deal with her kind."

"What is it?" Luna forced herself to ask, a morbid curiosity rising in her. "How can we save her?"

Heavy closed his eyes and shook his head.

"You will see. Spy is very smart too. He knows, and will do what we can not."

Before she could ask any more, the door to her room opened and Scout popped his head in. Looking more worse for the wear than when he had left, he looked around awkwardly before walking back in.

"Yo, princess. And you too big-guy," the RED runner jogged in place as he spoke. "Everythin's set. Spy wants us down in fronta' where we think those freaks broke in."

"Very well. Is time to finish this," Heavy said, standing up and stretching. "It has been a long night already. You will join us, yes?"

"Of course," Luna stood up to follow them out. "Tis' our duty to see this through to the end. Whatever it may be."

She took one last look at Twilight who remained sleeping, and walked behind both Scout and Heavy as they closed the doors to leave. Looking at her two loyal guards posted at her door, she gave them a nod before casting a protective magic shell over her room. She had never gotten a chance to ask why her sister's student had mysteriously arrived at Canterlot just in time for Chrysalis' attack, but there were too many things happening as of late that seemed fatalistically directed. She would surely have to ask her later, but only after things were settled with the changelings once and for all.

But unbeknownst to Luna, right as the doors to her room had closed Twilight threw her covers off and bolted to the window. Feigning her own sleep, she had silently listened to Heavy and Luna talk the entire time. With her magic she teleported from the window balcony, just before the alicorn's spell finished encasing the room.

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

Chapter 7: Sudden Death

Flying through the air was all Princess Luna could do to maintain her calm. Every part of the royal castle she flew past showed signs of destructive attack, and in pained her to pass by so many of her ponies without being able to stop and assure them that the fighting would soon be over. Her own armor had taken its fair share of damage in what fighting she had participated in, but the stress of battle more than anything else was taking its toll on her stamina.

From the strange communication device given to her she could hear a faint voice of one of the humans saying, “. . . that. . . safe. . . room. . . throne . . .”

“Where in Tartarus is it safe!?” Luna yelled to herself in frustration. She only had a vague idea where the two humans could have gone, and all of the normal magical signal beams in the castle had been turned off because of the changeling attack. It wasn’t as if Luna could leisurely fly around the skies of the castle in open sight looking for them. Not when there was still so much to be done!

Scout and Heavy, for their parts, were fighting more marauding changelings that hadn’t gotten the general orders to retreat. It was risky for them to attract more attention since Chrysalis has probably warned the swarm about them, but neither mercenary cared.

Three times the barrel of Scout’s twelve gauge baby face’s blaster flared. Only two changelings went down in a bloody mess, but at least he didn’t end up hitting a friendly guardspony. Raising his scattergun so he could work the lever action easier, Scout turned and looked around at his surroundings. Beside the two dead changelings in front of him, the rest of the castle was becoming eerily silent. A hollow emptiness floated around the air, and it reminded him of the abandoned bases back in Teufort. Looking up to the heavens and tracing the stars with his eyes, he pointed to Luna flying above them and signalled for Heavy to try and get her attention.

Heavy tried to query her by speaking into the large clunky cellular phone Scout had pulled out from his gym bag.

"Is there more to fight? Do tiny cowards run away!? What happen to changeling queen?”

He knew that it was a dumb question, but couldn’t think of anything better to ask. The idea that the strongest fighters were all going to be talking when there was fighting to be done did not sit well with him, but there wasn’t anything he could do alone. He knew from past experiences that when Spy had a plan, it was best to not speak out but listen.

“. . . to . . . throne . . . go . . .” was all the radio said.

“Did I hear that right?” Scout asked, and Heavy shook the phone in his hand frustratedly. “Throne room? I don’t live here! Where ‘da hell is ‘dat supposed to be!?”

Scout turned to see Heavy listening in on the blocky phone with his ears glued to the receiver. He looked at the device doubtfully, and threw it back to Scout for him to catch.

“Princess says she will lead us. Throne is near very top of castle.”

“Great. She gets to fly around up there while we do all ‘da fightin’,” Scout snorted indignantly. “Whelp, let’s get to it then. Whatever Spy’s got cookin’ up better be worth all ‘dis hassle.”

“Da’, Heavy agrees. But we must hurry. We should not waste time that we could spend fighting.”

Anxious to keep moving, both Scout and Heavy continued onward doing their best to follow Luna in the sky from the ground. Both hoped the night would soon be over, but neither had any way of knowing and without a voice booming overhead and telling them how much longer the enemy team would continue their attacks. Neither mercenary would admit it to the other, but the nonstop fighting had started to take an exhausted toll on them without the constant rejuvenation of their Medic’s healing beams.

Behind them Twilight Sparkle continued to follow both humans from the shadows.

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

Luna tucked her wings in as she landed, her hooves connecting with the floor with a light tap. With the main halls of the castle mostly cleared of changelings, the pathway to the throne room had been simpler to navigate once she had managed to lead Scout and Heavy out of the living quarters wing they had been in.

With a silent nod of agreement, all three opened the large double doors to walk inside.

“We see you are quite busy,” Luna commented as she walked toward the large table displaying a marked map of the castle in front of her throne. Around her members of both the Day and Night Guard were running about occupied in their business. Some of the guard saluted as she had entered, but returning formalities was the last thing on her mind.

“Indeed.” Spy remarked neutrally. Taking a long drag of his cigarette, he pointed to the empty throne. “Come and sit down your majesty. It is important that you refresh yourself on what is happening around the castle.”

Gazing at the empty seat she normally took for granted, she noted the symbolic purpose of his request. From the way in which everything had been arranged it was clear that whoever sat in the throne would be the center of information incoming and outgoing. Next to her Spy would be able to tell her about what information he had gathered, all while recognizing her authority despite having done most of the work prior to her arrival.

“What news do you have for us, mister Spy?” Luna asked. Gracefully she took to the air, turning herself around mid flight and gently landing on her throne.

“Chrysalis is in retreat to see if she can rally her remaining forces.” Spy’s statement was delivered with such conviction that she felt compelled to ask how he knew. “Earlier, I was unable to stop her from running away. For that, you have my apologies.”

“No, ‘tis we who should be thanking you,” Luna said. “You have done us a boon for taking on the changeling queen by yourself. But we must ask, why did you insist on doing so in the first place?”

“It was a matter of pride, your majesty,” he confessed. Out of embarrassment he turned away as he continued. “I underestimated her magic powers. Talents such as those are very powerful against my own techniques. I hope you can forgive me for acting in haste.”

“Very well. But we ask that you please keep in mind that many of us have powers as well,” Luna said, speaking bluntly. “If you had not been so eager to fight alone, we could have captured Chrysalis together.”

“Yes. Again, my apologies your majesty,” Spy bowed. “I won’t be so hasty in ‘ze future.”

Scout and Heavy exchanged glances briefly, both doubting the sincerity of the dashing rogue’s words. As if the start of their conversation were a signal, the soldiers around them in the makeshift command room returned to their assignments. But before Luna had time to follow up with her own questions to the other two humans, a line had formed for new information about questions, requests, and protests from ponies all throughout the castle. There weren’t enough bandages to treat the wounded. Where were the injured being sent to? There wasn’t enough room in castle’s guest rooms which had been turned into makeshift hospitals. When was the counterattack going to be launched for the inner chambers? The sudden barrage of information was more than she could handle, and she looked around helplessly.

“Let castle commissars make decisions,” Heavy advised, speaking up after a moment. “You must plan for bigger picture. Do not be bothered by tiny things.”

“Yeah, but make sure ‘dat you aren’t losin’ ground in other areas,” Scout chimed in as well. He hunched himself over the table, taking note of which areas of the map were marked with red and blue flags. “If those freaks are really on the run, double check first so you don’t let your guard down on areas you think are clear.”

“And last, we should confirm ‘ze whereabouts of Chrysalis,” Spy said, the last to throw his advice in on purpose. “It is of ‘ze utmost importance ‘zat you understand what she is thinking of doing next.”

“We believe there are more important matters to attend to, Mister Spy,” Luna pushed aside the reports all on the table in front of her. Scanning the map with a critical eye, she was pleased to find that the changeling invaders were being pushed back on all fronts. “She is only one changeling, regardless of her position in the swarm. We have the injured to tend to, as well as damage done to the castle to fix.

Spy shook his head in disagreement before crossing his arms over his chest. “My fears are ‘zat she will live up to her reputation of being the unquestioned leader of ‘ze swarm,” he explained, “because her plan has not yet been foiled. She is also an impressive tactician, your majesty. By attacking so many places across ‘ze castle at once, it seems to me ‘zat she wasn’t trying to capture it. More than likely she intended to kidnap you and your sister in ‘ze chaos, and gather information for a future attack while Canterlot remained leaderless.”

As Spy spoke, it dawned on him that even if Chrysalis had been caught off guard, her decision to about-face had been too sudden. He had assumed that her determination to fight had simply been broken, but what if the changeling queen’s plan was more layered than simple territory control?

“Despite her failures, you feel she was too in control?” pushed Luna.

“Hmm... Perhaps, ” Spy said, hedging. “It just seems odd, no? Even in retreat, ‘zey are slipping through ‘ze fingers of your forces.”

Suddenly a white pegasus guard walked into the throne room with several written papers in his saddlebags. Cloud Skipper saluted as he walked up to Luna, eyeing the humans at her sides uneasily before announcing something that gave her even more concern.

“Ma’am,” he said with urgency, “I’ve got a report from the wings of the castle. If we continue on our current courses, we won’t be able to stop most of the changelings from retreating into the crystal caverns.”

The Princess of the Night had no way of measuring how much the changeling queen’s plan had been forced to change. Because many of her officers in the Night Guard were scattered in fights both inside and outside of the castle, she had no way of knowing what the fighting strength of her own forces was either. If the reports she had been receiving before heading to her older sister’s bedroom to confront Chrysalis again had been true, then the most logical choice would be for the defending guard to continue fighting until the invaders were defeated.

But the unexpected presence of the human mercenaries of the RED team had changed the situation, and now there was an opportunity for the Royal Guard to launch a counterattack against the invading changelings.

“Hmm,” Luna said, pondering for a minute. “We fear we may yet be lead into another trap by Chrysalis. Can we spare soldiers for an attack when we have so many wounded and injured to take care of?”

“Speaking frankly your majesty, you cannot. Your forces are too divided and exhausted from fighting a battle ‘zey were not prepared for. But we,” Spy pointed to himself and the other two mercenaries of RED, “are not. We will go finish our jobs, while you will attend your forces from here.”

Luna frowned visibly, not bothering to hide her suspicions in her voice. “We cannot say we approve of sending our guests to do so much in our place. Are you opposed to our fighting alongside you?”

“Yes,” Spy replied flatly, his tone missing all of the formalities he had been using. “There is too much to lose if something should happen to you, your majesty. Chrysalis could turn her defeat into a partial victory should she get lucky. Or...are you more worried about becoming indebted to us?” he taunted, enjoying the mildly offended look on the alicorn’s face. “Either way, it does not matter. What matters now is what state you and your sister will be in by ‘ze end of ‘zis. You have a reputation to preserve, and we don’t want any other villains getting any ideas in their heads now do we?”

Luna didn’t answer immediately, instead staying silent to think. She couldn’t argue with his reasoning. After all, come the morning every newspaper in Equestria would be wanting as much information they could print on the events of the night. Wild speculation over details of the attack would only fuel fires of fear and paranoia, as she had learnt the hard way from the aftermath of the royal wedding incident.

For weeks after Chrysalis’ first attack a mood of paranoia had swept the nation, with fear and distrust surmounting harmony in the minds of her subjects. Eventually the fervor of the imaginary changeling threat had calmed down, but not after an extensive information campaign by Celestia to assure everypony that a swarm of changelings were not about to show up to try and conquer another city.

But what of her unexpected allies? What was their angle on events of the night? Luna was torn over figuring out why Spy had so suddenly isolated himself and Chrysalis in Celestia’s bedroom. His failure to apprehend (or kill) the changeling queen only added to her suspicions, and she had to wonder if the masked human had made some sort of secret deal while he was out of anypony’s sight. If she remembered correctly, the contract of the RED mercenaries would only last a year. She had no illusions that the humans could and would spend part of their year planning for the years to come after it.

Still, she had use for their talents. Their experience in fighting had their main selling point as guards, after all. It would be redundant to try and keep constant surveillance on the humans since the same ponies spying could have been used to protect the element bearers in the first place.  It was now her job to think past the events of the night. At the rate everything was going, she would be spending her hours writing up a statement for the Equestrian media to release tomorrow.

Her older sister had been right: humans were not as plain as their appearances...

“Very well,” Luna replied simply. “We shall defer to your experience on this matter. We shall stay here to continue organizing the relief effort.”

“Thank you for your cooperation your majesty,” Spy replied, bowing once more. “I promise ‘zat we will hold up our end of your plan. Now, if you will excuse us.”

Signalling for his two comrades to follow him, Spy swiftly exited the throne room with Scout and Heavy behind him. Luna watched them go, unable to shake the feeling that, despite her new responsibilities, she was still being used in some manner. As soon as they cleared the entrance way and were out of earshot, the runner ran up to him and put his arm over his shoulder.

“So what’s up? Why’d you leave us back there? We gonna’ go show ‘dat ugly bug who's boss?”

“Calm yourself, boy.” Spy removed Scout’s arm and reached into his pocket. “She will get what she has coming, all in good time. Take ‘ze map I had made, and go with Heavy into the cavern entrance to meet up with Demoman.”

“Wait, what? Demo’s here too?” Scout scratched his head, taking the folded piece of paper Spy handed him from the inside of his spytron 3000 disguise kit. “You gonna’ tell us what’s going on?”

"Does it really matter?” Spy asked, a little irritation in his voice. “I don’t remember you asking so many questions back in Teufort. Just jog around doing your job, yes?”

“Alright, alright!” Scout blew a raspberry, throwing his arms into the air and rolling his eyes. “God, even a million miles from home you still have a French stick up your ass.”

Heavy gave a simple nod in return, and began to run after Scout who had taken off already. Spy watched his comrades go, allowing himself a small smile of satisfaction. Piece by piece everything was coming together, and the events of the night would soon be over for everyone involved. There had been a few unexpected problems, but nothing he couldn’t work out in one way or another. And speaking of loose ends...

“You can come out now,” Spy called out. He turned around looking at a large tapestry hanging from a wall that had a distinctive lump behind it. “Princess Luna will remain on her throne for the rest of the night. You have nothing to worry about.”

Slowly trotting out from her hiding spot the shadows of the hall, Twilight Sparkle looked at Spy questioningly. The human smiled back at her pleasantly, pushing the cigarette in his mouth from side to side. “I trust ‘zat you had a safe trip here?” he asked.

“...Did you know I was there the whole time?”

“Yes. Part of my profession is being very good at hiding and finding others ‘zat are doing ‘ze same,” Spy explained regarding her carefully. “I hope you aren’t angry at me for before.”

“Not quite,” Twilight frowned, remembering quite clearly what had happened before her unexpected nap. She reluctantly moved out from her hiding spot and trotted over to him. “But if you do it again, I hope you won’t be angry at me if I take that sleeping dart and stick it back in your neck.”

Spy chuckled despite himself. “Thank you ‘zen. I ask ‘zat you take my word for it that I won’t be doing ‘zat twice. Now come closer,” he motioned for her to come over to him. “I have something for you and you alone.”

“What is this about?” Twilight asked. She watched him slowly take a square object out from his inner suit pocket. “Is it about that thing?”

“Correct,” he nodded. “Miss Sparkle, it is my personal belief ‘zat trust is one of ‘ze hardest things to attain between living creatures.” Spy extended the folding antenna on the Engineer’s remote detonator, and watched the electronic display show the number of Demoman’s scottish resistance sticky bombs active in its range. “I know ‘zat tonight has been very tiresome for you, but I ask ‘zat you give me your full attention for what I am going to be asking. Take what time you must, but please be sure of yourself when you answer.”

“...Okay?” she said, taken a little off guard by how serious he was becoming.

He looked down at her, his eyes narrowing. “I mean it, Miss Sparkle.”

“Fine,” she said, frowning. “But a fair warning, I reserve the right to not answer any questions I was tricked into.”

“...Oh? Ah, hahaha.” His mood broke from her answer, and he laughed lightly into hand. “Fine. Yes. Forgive me for not showing you ‘ze respect you deserve. I will cut to ‘ze chase.”

Crouching down to match her height, he lowered himself down onto one knee and held the remote detonator in front of her. “‘Zis device will set off an explosive trap my companions have set for ‘ze retreating changelings. If ‘ze trap is sprung, it will bring down ze’ rock walls of ‘ze caverns on top of ‘zem. But since we are outsiders to ‘ze politics of ‘zis world, I want you to have ‘ze honors of activating it.”

Twilight looked at the device in his hands, noting how its simplicity betrayed its true purpose. She looked up at Spy who was waiting for her response. “I refuse,” she said firmly.

“‘Zat is what I figured you would say,” he said. “Now let me ask: do I have your permission for me to press ‘zis button?”

“No you do not,” she said, just as firmly as before. She stomped her hoof down on the ground as she spoke. “I made up my mind earlier tonight. I don’t want any more deaths this night for anypony.”

“Hmm... ‘Zen, would you object to Princess Luna pressing it?” he offered.

“I would, but Princess Luna is a princess by her own right. I would do everything I could to convince her not to press it.”

“I see. ‘Zat is your final decision?”

“Yes.”

“You will spare their lives? Those who have hurt and killed some of your own kind?”

“Yes.”

“And what if other ponies ridicule your decision? Would you choose the same choice again? ”

“Yes.”

“...And if ‘ze changelings should attack again, would you regret sparing their lives tonight?”

“No,” she said. She stared up at him with honest eyes and spoke with a firm resolve. “Is that all you had to ask?”

“Yes,” he answered. He stood back up, folding the antenna on the detonator back down as he did. “You are someone with as much of a firm moral character as I was lead to believe. If ‘zis were a novel, you would make for an excellent tragic heroine.”

“Tragic?” she asked suspiciously, unsure of whether or not his remark was a compliment. “Why would you say that?”

“It is in my experience ‘zat most well intentioned plans are doomed to fail from complications. For instance, what would you say if someone close to you were killed in a future changeling attack? What if their family blamed you for not stopping ‘zem on ‘zis night?”

“I would still defend my decision,” she argued. “The world isn’t as simple as trading an eye for an eye. Princess Celestia has always told me to treat others as I would want to be treated. I also believe that anypony is to be treated innocent before guilty.”

“Innocent? Are ‘zey not guilty of attacking your kingdom twice now?” he retorted, with eyebrows raised. “Would you be able to explain that to a grieving family? Or the family of those who were kidnapped and never found? Would you be able to accept ‘zem blaming you for ‘ze separation of their family for ‘ze rest of their lives?”

“I would have to, wouldn’t I? I’m not naive enough to think that doing the right thing doesn’t carry any responsibility, Mister Spy.”

“But do you not think ‘zat selfish of you? Keeping your own moral palette clean at 'ze price of other pony’s lives?”

“...”

Seeing the unconvinced stare she was giving him, he simply gave her a casual shrug in return. “My apologies. Perhaps ‘zis world is different, but in ‘ze world I am from, having ‘ze moral high ground rarely saves lives. I want you to be aware of ‘zis before you let something very serious pass you by.”

“Thank you for your concern, but I have made up my mind on the matter,” Twilight said. She continued to look up on him with an expression that showed that she was thinking deeply. “Now, may I ask some questions?”

He gave her a silent nod in a return, the straightest answer she had received so far.

“Would it be wrong of me to think that you aren’t just diplomats from a foreign land?”

“I suppose I can answer some questions since you were nice enough to humor me,” he said. “So to start; yes, you are correct. Being ambassadors from a foreign land is a cover story by ‘ze Princess for our presence here.”

“Then...” she began hesitantly. Had Chrysalis been telling the truth before? Had Luna been the one who lied to her, for the sake of protecting her older sister’s image? “Is it true that you’re...?”

“What Chrysalis said? Hired killers, you mean?” he gave her a wry grin, remembering the accusatory ramblings of the changeling queen. “Not quite. Unfortunate for her majesty, by some fateful coincidence she choose to attack Canterlot coinciding with our arrival. We simply choose to throw our weight in with you, since our business in ‘zis world involves your kind already.”

“And what is your ‘business’?” she asked persistently. “Why are you here in Equestria?”

“My compatriots and I are employed by a company in my world called Team Fortress Industries. Your Princess Celestia made a deal with my employers in regards to our unique services, for reasons that are unknown to me.”

Mulling over his answers, Twilight wondered about the truthfulness of his words. The other two humans seemed very upfront about their thoughts, but the suited Spy clearly specialized in things like subterfuge and deception. Was it possible that he was feeding her false information, in hopes of getting her to ask more questions that could reveal new information to him by proxy? But even if that were the case, Princess Luna seemed to have put her trust in them. And since Celestia was still sleeping from the sedative Chrysalis had used on her, she could only assume that the Princess did as well.

“One last question. Will you answer me honestly?” she said, suddenly wishing that she had Fluttershy’s stare on her side.

“I can only speak for myself Miss Sparkle. ‘Zat is ‘ze only truth 'zat never changes.”

“...Why are you telling me all of this?”

“A misplaced sense of pity,” Spy took a deep drag of his cigarette as he spoke. “I feel ‘zat you have a right to know ‘zat your little world is about to get much bigger. Bigger than ‘ze responsibilities Celestia has tested you with so far. But ‘zat can wait for a later time, since we are preparing for ze’ final curtain. Will you be joining us?”

“You’re going to confront Chrysalis? How do you know she’ll be there?”

“I just know,” he muttered, “because she is ‘ze kind of being who needs to get ‘ze final word in anything. Even when she is running with her tail between her legs.”

“Then are you going to kill her? If we do find her, like you think we will?”

“We will have to see Miss Twilight. Living creatures are like dice; we throw ourselves into the direction of our own choosing.”

♪~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~♪

Introduction

I wanta' tell you a story.

This story is gonna' start with a lotta' of the details skipped. A lotta' of things you all know already, okay? It's why you're even bothering to read 'dis in the first place. The things that I'm gonna' write (and you're gonna' read) probably won't make much sense to a lotta' people, but then again, you're not like a lotta' of people if you're still reading this. This isn't some story that any sane person would believe. This isn't a story I expect everyone to understand, but I gotta' to write it anyway.

Someone has to write it, cause' it deserves to be written. You get me? 'Dat's just how I feel it is.

Anyway, who am I? Haha, I don't even know where to start with you...

I'm the fastest and smartest runner Redmond Mann ever had the pleasure of paying from that stupidly fat fortune he inherited from his father. But you know that already, don't you? You know who the tomato soup drinkin' warfreak is. You know who our...Pyro...is. You know who our drunk one-eyed degenerate is. You know who the big fat bald guy with the thick Russian accent is. You know who our nerdy egg-headed toy maker is. You know who the needle addicted hippocratic hypocrite is. You know who our grumbling, mumbling, grumpy kangaroo fucker is. You know who the double-dealin', backstabbin' scumbag in the balaclava is.

Okay, so they've got their problems. Their "quirks." But what if I told you they're not all that bad?

Well, depending on what color you're wearin' anyway.

I could go on all day about them - and maybe I will later - but for now they're just a waste of time.

You've met the team.

The way I figure, since I've got the most time to laze around and do jack shit (my brothers always said, never put off a beatin' for tomorrow that you can dish out today!), it means that I get to embellish everything for history. If this here masterpiece ever gets published into a novel or somethin', let me just say: "Hi Ma'!"

Personally, I blame the weather in Equestria. In Teufort and all of the places in the middle of nowhere we would defend from the BLU team, the weather was always harsh. From the Badlands to Badwater Basin, the sun had baked the landscape into a dry and arid wasteland. Whenever we went to the Sawmill or Mannworks, the weather was always humid and cloudy in between torrential rainstorms. There was no love at Coldfront and Viaduct either, with persistant blizzards that were sometimes strong enough to stop both RED and BLU from even leaving their bases.

The only place I can think of that was ever pleasant was 2Fort, minus the raw volume of high explosives that passed from one battlements to the other. And bullets. And arrows. And lasers. And that was on a good day.

Now, let me put the breaks on my thoughts so far 'ere.

I'm going to stop and break this up for a minute. Because I need to be frank with you (yeah you) the reader.

The reason why I became a mercenary was because of how bad ass it sounded. Being the youngest out of eight never gave me a second to let down appearances. I didn't want to let my mom down. I don't know what happened to my father, or whether he ever existed in the first place, but all my life I never wanted to let her down. I wanted to make her proud, since all of my older brothers were tough guys too. When we roamed our turf in Boston, well, I couldn't stomach the idea of letting them down. They were more than just my family. When I earned their respect, it meant the world to me. And I would do just about anything to keep it.

But to do anything a guy needs money. And 'dat was something no one in my family ever found a way to earn enough of. I needed to get a job, and one that would somehow payout while letting me to keep my pride. I wanted to do something so incredibly awesome that no one could make fun of me for it, no matter what I choose to do afterward.

Listening to Rainbow "Chicken Wings" go on about her idols, the Wonderbolts, kind of reminds me about how I used to be. Like how I used to idolize baseball players, before I got into the full-time business of being a mercenary.

I get the feeling a lotta' things around Equestria are remindin' the guys of how things used to be. Before RED, before BLU, and before giant killer robots. 'Dat's why I'm writing this.

Cause I'm not sure if I like being here.

The sun in Equestria is never too hot, and the nights are never too cold. The weather is planned out ahead of time and never changes schedule. The food tastes fresh, and the water is clean. There is no pollution even in the larger cities. Crime is almost non-existent. The poor and needy are taken care of. The main government is responsive and caring about its citizens, and all of its citizens in return are responsive and caring to each other. Good always triumphs over evil, blah blah blah...

There's something about all of it that gives me the chills.

It's not 'dat bein' here is making me question myself. No really, I mean it. It's not like 'dat, alright? Cause I know you're all like, "But Scout? Aren't you an intelligence capturing, cart pushing, point capturing bad ass in every way possible?"

To which I'd say, "Yeah, I totally am. Even on sundays." But 'dat's not what I'm gettin' at.

I had plenty of time to doubt myself when I first joined RED, and got shipped in to Dustbowl with the rejects and lowest ranking mercenaries under Redmond's company. Living in run down facilities, stealing ammunition off of BLU corpses and raiding camps for supplies. Going from battle to battle, dodging bullets, rockets, grenades, and even crazier things in between. I mean, hell, I think I've beaten some BLUs to death with a frying pan when my bat broke.

There were plenty of times when I questioned what part of my stupid twenty year old brain thought being a mercenary was a good idea. A cool idea. Something 'dat would work, and not be a suicidal dead end like it was for so many other suckers who had joined RED.

That's not the problem. It's me, but it's not me. I just don't think we should be here.

Since we all came back after quittin', maybe that means that we don't belong anywhere.

But the last thing we should be doing is hanging around some place that'll inspire others to become like us.

Well, I think "Chicken Wings" is waking up above me. I don't know how she can sleep on branches of apple trees like some friggin' giant ass bird, but I've probably found more awkward places to sleep in the past. (The basement of our base at Fastlane was probably the worst.) Last thing I'm gonna' do is let her see me writin' this thing, as if there aren't a million things already she's always buggin' me about. (Racing, cloudball, fictional heroes, yada yada.)

If she thinks I'm keeping a diary or something, I'll never hear the end of it.

...Y'know, maybe I'm being more serious than I should be about all 'dis.

But if I were to get all philosophical and shit for once, I would still say we don't belong here. Really, we don't. And not because Heavy keeps gettin' in fights with 'dat big brown bear at Flutterwimp's cottage.

Equestria is a place where dreams don't die to reality.

We're only gonna' attract more trouble than we'll stop.