Chapter 2: A Blonde Goddess and a Big Lizard

"Hey everypony. What did I miss?" So spoke the most bizarre-looking lizard that Lewis had ever seen. It was the size of a small child, with purple scales and a small green crest on its head. Its teeth and claws were small, but sharp. The way it tottered slightly made it clear that it hadn't fully regained consciousness. It also hadn't run for cover, so Lewis decided it hadn't noticed him yet, and the wisest thing to do was make for the nearest exit, which he did, grabbing his hat as he went. He hit the door at a run, flinging it open and lighting out with all speed. He was gone in a matter of seconds.

Once he was outside, he saw that he was in the midst of an apple orchard, with rows of trees stretching off in every direction, and a dirt path leading away from the strange farmhouse he had just left. Thinking that the path would be to obvious a choice in the event he was pursued, he ran toward a large red barn nearby, thinking to hide there and watch to see if he was followed. Reaching his destination, he heaved the door of the barn open just far enough to slip inside, closing it behind him.

He relaxed slightly in the dim interior of the barn, deciding he was safe for the moment after hearing no sounds of pursuit. Then a deep voice spoke behind him asking, "Who in tha hay are you?" Lewis spun, around, but saw nobody there, only a large, bright red horse with an even brighter orange mane, which would have worried him ordinarily, but given the circumstances he could forgive.

Lewis drew his buck-knife from his belt, and began to creep slowly down the length of the building. The horse followed his movements warily. He moved with all the stealth he could manage, but reached the other end of the barn without discovering the source of the voice. "Alright," he said at last, "I heard ya clear 'nough, but I don't see ya. I didn't come here to start trouble, heck I don't even know where 'here' is. I just wanna get out and head on home."

The horse walked over and looked at him in the face. "Well," the horse said, "that's all fine an' dandy, but I still wanna know why yer trespassin' in this 'ere barn. Come ta think of it, ya still didn't answer mah first question. Now I got anuther: what are ya?" Lewis looked the horse up and down. Its mouth had moved, the sound had come from it. It had spoken to him.

Lewis tore screaming out of the barn like a man possessed, his knife dropped and forgotten as he ran with everything he was worth for the tree line. He could hear his heart pounding in his ears as he shifted himself along. Sweat poured from his face as he dove past the first few trees and sprinted along the rows, putting the best amount of distance between himself and the little farm as he could. Then, something caught his boot and he tripped. His head hit something solid his vision grayed. "Twice in one day," he muttered as consciousness left him once more, "Now that's just embarassin' ain't it?"

Applejack was the first to recover from the sudden awakening of the strange creature. As soon as she heard the front door slam, she shook herself and peeked over the flipped table she had taken cover behind. Spike still sat in the same spot, rubbing his eyes trying to see what the commotion was about. Applebloom's hindquarters shivered where they were exposed, and Twilight's horn betrayed her position behind the sofa itself. "Girls, this ain't the time fer hidin'. That critter's gotta be jest as scared as us!"

Applebloom and Twilight slowly pulled themselves together, emerging from their respective hiding places. Applejack righted the table and dusted herself off. The three of them looked at each other, nodding to confirm that everypony was unharmed. Spike, now properly awake, looked around in confusion. "Seriously," Spike insisted, "What did I miss?" That elicited a giggle from Applebloom.

"I'll explain later," said Twilight, "Applejack! That creature is afraid, and I don't know how dangerous it might be to anypony it meets. We need to catch it before anything happens!" Applejack nodded, determination written on her features. She to her saddlebags and retrieved her lasso. She couldn't have that strange thing hurting somepony on her watch. Before she and Twilight had reached the door, the most unholy sound that either of them had ever heard reached them from outside, a howl of terror the likes of which had not been heard in the history of Equestria.

"Let's go Twilight!" Applejack shouted, bursting through the door. She couldn't see which way the creature had gone, but she charged off all the same. "Take the road," she yelled over her shoulder at her friend. Following instinct, she ran in the direction that seemed right. It just felt right.

It wasn't of course. Twilight searched up and down the road for hours, while Applejack went row by row, finding nothing. The creature must have been faster than it looked. Big Macintosh joined them, showing them the strange knife it had been carrying. "It didn't seem to know I was there 'til I spoke right tah its face." That added another concern. Was it able to see? When Applebloom and Spike tried to join in, they were promptly sent back indoors, with a scolding from Twilight chasing them.

As the light of day dimmed, Twilight returned to the farmhouse, talking about sending a letter to Celestia. Big Macintosh offered to escort her. Applejack chose to persist in her search. She still hadn't checked in a few places. Still, with the light fading, she wasn't able to keep going much longer. At last, she recognized defeat and turned back. "Ah just pray that nopony gets hurt by that thing," she muttered to herself. That was the moment her front hoof came down on something too squishy to be the ground, something that groaned in response.

It took Applejack a full three seconds to realize what she must be stepping on. When she did, she jumped a full four feet in the air, and came down ready to fight . . . only to find that there was nothing to fight. Puzzled, she looked down at the prone figure of the whatever-the-hay-it-was. It didn't stir. She took a closer look, and gasped when the final rays of the sun glinted off of a slowly dripping liquid that oozed from a sizeable gash on the things head. "Oh dang it," said Applejack. She grabbed the injured beast by the collar of its shirt and began to drag it back towards the house, hoping the injury would not prove lethal.

Lewis regained consciousness briefly. His mind seemed to produce strange images, to confuse him he was sure. He knew he'd taken a bad hit. Sometimes that was the body’s response to severe damage; producing a pleasant fiction to distract him. Still, he had to admit this wasn't a bad one.

He could see the stars as they came out, but it wasn't like what he was used to. He could see them so much more clearly, and the moon was bigger than he had ever seen it. He wanted to reach out and try to touch it, but his arm wouldn't respond. He was moving though, being dragged along the ground. Whoever was doing the dragging stopped, and he heard heavy breathing. "Moving me must be quite the task," he wanted to say, but all that came from his mouth was a gurgle. That must have gotten their attention because a face appeared, silhouetted against the moon.

There, in that moment, Lewis looked up at Applejack and saw something impossible. He saw a goddess in the moonlight, with gorgeous golden hair. She wore an old, well-worn hat that belied her divine nature. She looked down at him with so much compassion and concern that he wanted to cry. "You alright sugarcube?" Her voice was to him as a thousand birds singing in perfect harmony. As he slipped from the waking world again, his last thought was, “That's gotta be the most beautiful horse I've ever seen.”

He awoke an unknowable amount of time later. Lewis groaned, pain flooding through his skull. He was lying on something comfortable enough, but he couldn't see where he was, and his head was alternating between a sharp, burning pain and a dull throbbing ache. He lay there unmoving for a time, before a voice spoke to him out of the darkness. "Hey there. Are you feeling alright?"

He couldn't place the voice, but it sounded friendly enough. "My head . . . ." He heard a soft, small noise, and his head ceased to pound quite so hard. The sharp pain also dimmed and finally went away entirely. He could feel himself smile a little, as relief replaced discomfort.

"There, that should be more comfortable," the friendly-sounding voice said, "you took quite the nasty spill. It seems you hit your head on a root. Your head had a sizeable gash, and you've been unconscious for a few hours."

Lewis sighed in relief. The big lizard, the talking horse, they had all been dreams, a nightmare foisted on him in his unconsciousness by a mind addled with pain. He felt warm and cozy now, whatever medication they were giving him was pretty effective. Before he could get really comfortable, a terrifying thought occurred to him. "Wait, where's Bourbon?" he asked, concern for his prized animal overtaking his short-lived relief.

"I'm sorry, who?" the voice asked, confused.

"My horse, Bourbon! He's a pale American quarter horse, all muscle. He was with me when ah fell. He wouldn't 'ave left me there, he's too loyal fer that. I gotta know, is he okay?"

There were a few moments of quiet whispers. He distinctly heard the words, "What's he mean, his horse?" Finally, the kind voice returned. "When I found you, you were lying there alone. I'm sorry but I don't know where this 'Bourbon' of yours is, but I promise, we'll start looking for him at sunrise."

Lewis nodded. "Thank you, ummm . . . ?"

"Oh, where are my manners? My name is Twilight Sparkle," the voice said, without the slightest hint of joking, or any indication that there was anything odd about the name.

Lewis, however, recalled his upbringing as a proper gentleman, and didn't comment on the oddity of it, but merely replied, "A pleasure Miss Sparkle, mah name is Lewis. Uh, pardon me, but is there a reason I can't see anything?"

Lewis could hear the embarrassment in Twilight's tone as she responded. "Well, Lewis, we didn't want you to panic when you woke up, we were worried you might hurt yourself worse, and you really aren't in any condition for that right now, so we put a blindfold on you. I'm afraid we also tied your hands and feet, though that really wasn't my idea. Oh, and please, just call me Twilight."

"Well, I appreciate the thought I suppose, but I ain't gonna panic right now, so you can take the blindfold off now Miss Twilight," Lewis said, a little peeved by the unusual treatment but resolved to be polite. After all, his mamma had always told him that politeness wouldn't ever hurt, and could get him a good ways if he was in trouble.

"Okay," said the voice, "if you're quite sure." The cloth came off and Lewis squinted as the light in the room blinded him briefly. He held a hand up to his face, trying to see who he was talking to. He couldn't tell yet, but something was vaguely wrong about the shape. . . ."

"Well, now I need to ask you a question, Mr. Lewis," Twilight said.

"Sure," said Lewis, as his eyes finally began to adjust to the light.

"Just what are you?" asked the purple pony finally revealed to him. Lewis' eyes went wide as he drew breath to holler for help, but before he could, Twilight covered his mouth with one surprisingly dexterous hoof. "None of that now, you just promised me you weren't going to panic." Lewis regarded her with wide, wary eyes. "I'm going to let go now," said Twilight, "Please don't be afraid." Lewis nodded. "Don't scream." Again, he nodded. "Okay."

Twilight removed the hoof from his mouth. "My apologies, Miss Twilight," said Lewis, as he tried to choke down his fear, "I had myself to thinking that this was all a dream." He looked around, and saw he was back on the sofa in the farmhouse from before. A small filly and the purple lizard stood in one corner watching, protected by the large red stallion from the barn. Lewis' head was still foggy, but there seemed to be something missing.

"Um, forgive me, I am positive that I must be hallucinating, but, are all of y’all a bunch a little horses?"

A flash of irritation crossed Twilights face before she took on an expression of understanding and patience. "We prefer the term pony, if you don't mind." Lewis looked up at her again.

"I was afraid you were gonna say that," he groaned.

"Why?" asked the filly in the corner, "Yall got a problem with ponies?" Lewis inspected the speaker. She was angry at him, sure, but her voice reminded him of home.

"Naw miss," he said with a soothing smile, "It’s just I ain't never heard of a talkin' pony before." That got confused looks from everyone in the room.

"How is it you've never heard a pony talk?" Twilight asked.

"Just never did. Never thought they was supposed tah. This is all kinda strange. Also, that is the biggest lizard I have ever seen in my life."

"Who are you calling a lizard?" the purple thing snarled. Twilight gestured for him to remain calm. "Spike is a baby dragon, but again, none of us know what you are, so it's reasonable to assume you've traveled a long, long way to get here," she said in a reasonable tone.

Lewis couldn't argue with that reasoning. The question, he thought, was exactly how far? "Well," he said, "I am a human being, scientific name Homo Sapiens. Native Texan, United States born and raised. Does that tell you anything?"

Twilight scribbled furiously on a piece of parchment as he spoke, recording his words in exacting detail. "It's a start," she said, "I'll send this to the princess, hopefully she can shed some light on this."

"Princess?" Lewis questioned, but Twilight didn't hear him, handing the note to Spike, whom promptly incinerated it with a fiery belch, leaving Lewis greatly confused.

Before he could ask for clarification, the thing he had thought was missing earlier joined them. "Hey everypony," said Applejack as she trotted down the stairs, "Ah'm guessin' it didn' try and run off again?"

"Hello again goddess," said Lewis before he could shut his mouth. The room was silent as everypony stared at Lewis, their own mouths hanging open.

Author's Note

Chapter two, and it only took me all day to get around to it. Comments are welcome, criticism more so.