The Exorcism of Pinkie Pie

by Aurora Aura

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Alternate Universe, Comedy
Length: 1808

The spirit of Discord needs to have fun every once in a while and with the new reformed Discord he wasn't getting that fix, so he possesses Equestria's favourite party pony. What could possibly go wrong.

The spirit of Discord needs to have fun every once in a while and with his body in stone and desolate cold it isn't easy. But every once in a while he can still wreck havoc on the ponies of Equestria.

~A collaborated effort between myself and alcohol

note- Yeah this fic takes place pre reformed Discord, what of it?
note- If you've seen "The Exorcist" then this fic might seem somewhat familiar to you.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-07-09 21:00:01 UTC

The Exorcism of Pinkie Pie

Pinkie Pie paced back and forth across the floor of her bedroom. The usually chipper Party Pony now troubled by thoughts of recent events. Things started getting weird ever since Twilight went on that trip to Saddle Arabia for some "archaeological dig of a lifetime."

Various bad omens continue to pop up around Pinkie Pie. Mr. Cake has become estranged for reasons unknown. And worse, there were mysterious, unexplained sounds coming from the attic of Sugar Cube Corner. Pinkie Pie didn't think the Cakes had an attic as that was where her bedroom was found. But even in the top of the house the strange sounds continued to be heard. An average pony might write the sounds off to rats, but Pinkie Pie knew better. She always knew better. But no matter what she does nopony ever made sense of it.

Not even her extended family, the Cakes, would hear her pleas. On a recent night, Pinkie Pie's bed had begun to shake violently and she reacted the way any sane pony would. She crept into the Mr. and Mrs Cake's bedroom and crawled between them as they slept. The scolding she got when they woke up was completely uncalled for. Pinkie had thought they enjoyed her presence. After all, Mr. Cake had cuddled her in his sleep, so her presence clearly didn't disrupt much.

But Pinkie Pie listened to what they told her and continued to sleep in her vibrating bed. The Cakes came home that day with anxiety pills, and since then Pinkie has been taking them regularly. But perhaps it was the Cakes who should have taken medicine because both Mr. and Mrs Cake fell deeply ill shortly after. What little money Pinkie Pie made went to party and prank supplies; since she couldn't afford to send them to a proper hospital, she just put them in hospital beds and rolled them down the street. Their twins were sent via packaging to Rainbow Dash to take care of because Pinkie Pie knew she was great with kids. Luckily they both made it safely to Rainbow Dash's house.

But the curious happenings only became more frequent upon Twilight's return. Normally, Pinkie Pie would have thrown a party for the return of her friend. Instead, she anxiously requested that Twilight visit the now almost vacant Sugar Cube Corner to diagnose the Cakes' illness and the voices in the back of her mind.

Twilight's knocking on the door broke Pinkie Pie of her pill-induced trance state. Pinkie Pie bounced somberly to the door and allowed Twilight to enter. Twilight took one look at Pinkie Pie and knew she was troubled. Her hair remained curled and bouncy as usual, but she seemed off, like she was distraught at some thought unknown to Twilight.

"Okay Pinkie Pie, before we start, I need to know if you've made any major changes to your day-to-day routine before this all started," Twilight asked as she magicked up a clipboard and quill.

"Well I did play with that chaos board that appeared in my bedroom. Do you think that may have been it Twilight?" Pinkie Pie gave Twilight a steady and earnest look.

Twilight sighed in frustration. "Maybe Pinkie Pie. Maybe it was you toying with an evil device that just somehow magically appeared on your bed that cause all this" Twilight said, sarcasm lacing her words.

"Well it was on my floor, not my bed."

Twilight brought her hoof to her forehead in a motion that made a very audible noise.

"Wait here Pinkie Pie; I'll be right back," Twilight said as she stood up and walked out the front door. Pinkie Pie's eyes followed her as she left.

Pinkie Pie sat silently, just looking around the room and listening to the voices of Chaos that swirled around her head. Twenty minutes pass and Twilight walked back in with Applejack behind her.

"Whoa. You weren't kiddin' Twi, she really is a mess" Applejack said only to be immediately given a nudge to shut up from Twilight. "Oh, sorry" Applejack said as she pulled her ears against her head.

"Pinkie Pie" Twilight began. Pinkie Pie looked over at Twilight, still not talking.

"Wow that's creepy" Applejack said to nopony in particular.

"Pinkie Pie, why don't you go get some sleep, we'll watch over you. Make sure everything is alright." Twilight offered.

Pinkie Pie nodded and turned around and started walking up the stairs. She got about halfway up before she looked back down the stairs and said "She'll never get her cutie mark you know." Twilight, Applejack and Spike exchanged confused looks as Pinkie made her way to her bedroom.

About an hour had passed when they were startled by a loud sound coming from Pinkie Pie's bedroom.

Twilight and Applejack looked at each other briefly before darting up the stars and bursting into Pinkie Pie's bedroom. "What's going on?" Twilight shouted as she saw Pinkie Pie's bed shaking violently, rising up off the floor with Pinkie still on it. Applejack jumped on the bed in an attempt to keep it steady but it still levitates.

Suddenly the bed dropped and Pinkie Pie had started to rise and fall up and down on the bed in a way that seemed impossible for a anypony to do.

"Hold her steady" Twilight shouted to Applejack as she used her magic to start pulling together any rope like substances, mostly streamers, to make a binding for Pinkie Pie.

Applejack nodded towards Twilight and tried to pin Pinkie Pie to her bed, only to be thrown back against the adjacent wall by a strength Applejack didn't expect to come from the pink party pony.

Twilight dropped her focus and looked over at Applejack in confusion. Applejack shrugged.

Pinkie Pie sat up, turning to Twilight as she open her eyelids,relieving a cold icy thousand yard stare. It was as if she was looking through Twilight, rather than at her.

Pinkie Pie opened her mouth but when she spoke it sounded like there was two voiced coming through at the same time. That of Pinkie Pie's and the most recognizable male voice Twilight had ever heard,the voice of Discord.

"Do you mind? I'm doing the fishstick. It's a very delicate state of mind."

Applejack steadily stood back up and said "Don't worry Twi. I got this."

Pinkie Pie turned her head to look at Applejack but it didn't seem to phase her. Pinkie Pie opened her mouth, again speaking in that strange mixture of voices. "What are you going to do fair Applejack? Are you going to-" WHAM!

Pinkie Pie's question was cut short by Applejack's hind legs as she bucked Pinkie square in her jaw, knocking her unconscious.

"We need professional help here Applejack."

"Ah couldn't agree with you more Twilight, anypony you had in mind?" Applejack asked.

"Well I was thinking since Princess Luna can enter dreams she could try and get inside Pinkie Pie's head and maybe get whatever is in there out."

"Sound good enough to me, but hows about we tie her down first."

"Agreed."

A few hours had passed and Twilight was pacing the Cake's shop foyer as Applejack looked out the window as they waited for Princess Luna to arrive. Twilight had gotten word to Luna through Celestia though Celestia had to investigate some disappearances in the Crystal Empire and attempt to calm their nerves.

Twilight's mind was racing at everything that had transpired earlier that night but nothing seemed to make much sense about this whole event.

"Twi, I see her." Applejack said as she trotted over and opened the front door to allow Princess Luna to enter. Both Twilight and Applejack gave a courteous bow before walking over to Luna.

Luna looked over towards the stairs and said "is she upstairs?"

"Yes Princess, follow us" Twilight said as she and Applejack led the way upstairs to Pinkie Pie's bedroom. When they walked into the room Pinkie Pie's head snapped over to the door, that glassy look looked passed you in her eyes now replaced with ones that seemed to peer into your very being. Applejack made an audible gulp.

"Pinkie Pie, are you still in there?" Luna asked.

"Pinkie Pie isn't here right now but your call is important to us, please stay on the line." Pinkie Pie said, still with that undertone of Discord's voice within her.

"Leave her now spirit of Discord, or I shall come in there to get you!" Princess Luna threatened, taking a few large steps to Pinkie Pie, closing the distance until she only a yard away. Twilight Sparkle watched Princess Luna in awe as she did this and was instantly glad she had mad the decision to contact Luna.

Pinkie Pie's face scrunched up for a moment before making an entire three hundred and sixty degree turn. Even Princess Luna took a step back in shock and horror. As Pinkie's head came full circle she opened her mouth and out came an abundance of a fluffy creamy substance. Which almost instantly made contact with Luna's face, causing her to fall back on her flank and sit in astonishment.

"Was that. 'Ah mean. Did Pinkie Pie just barf frosting all over your face Princess?" asked Applejack.

Princess Luna's eyebrow twitched slightly and she simply said "Vanilla Buttercream."

"What are we going to do now Princess?" asked Twilight.

"Nothing. I am done. I don't even really care anymore." Princess Luna said as she started walking towards the door. Twilight's jaw dropped at the Princess' callousness.

"Can't you just enter her dreams?" asked Twilight frantically.

"Maybe. If she was sleeping." Luna said as she motioned to Pinkie Pie, who beamed a smile in response.

Twilight turned back to the Princess but she was already out the door and was flying away. Twilight then turned to Applejack and asked "what are we going to do now?"

"Can't we just leave it alone Twilight. 'Ah mean is she really that much different than she was before?"

Twilight gave a defeated sigh and walked over to the bed. "Fine, I guess we'll just pretend nothing has changed then."

Twilight untied Pinkie Pie and Pinkie jumped onto Twilight and gave her a big hug and in that dual voice that Twilight was going to have to get used said "Oh a thousand thanks Twilight Sparkle. You will not live to regret this decision."

"Um, what?" Twilight asked as she pushed Pinkie Pie away. Pinkie Pie didn't answer though, instead she just bounced out of the room.

"I'm sure everything will work out for the best Twi" Applejack said reassuringly.

Pinkie Pie's head popped around the door frame and she quickly said "No it wont!" before disappearing down the hall, her haunting double laugh echoing in the halls as she left Sugar Cube Corner.