The Element of B00bz and H4x0rz and drugs and stuff

by ThaumicSlime

Rating: mature
Tags: Romance, Comedy, Adventure, Random, Human
Length: 87

A heartwarming tale of how a Human known as Conner found his way into the colourful realm known a Equestria... loljk2edgy3u

Now, listen here kiddies. I have a story to tell you all. It's the story of how I found my way to the magical and sexist land of Equestria.

"But Wind! You already told us this one last nigh-"

SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU SHITTY LITTLE CUNT. IF YOU SAY ONE MORE FUCKING WORD I'LL RIP YOUR FUCKING DICK OFF.

Ahem, moving on. It all began on a sunny day in my mom's basement, a day much edgier than usual…

This is one of the many newly improved versions of "The Element of Time."

Credit to TheaterCritic for the inspiration and the original fic.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-07-03 17:02:35 UTC

A Wet Welcome ;)

---------------------------------------------A Wet Welcome---------------------------------------------

Finally.

My first masturbation sequence was complete. All those hours of pain and bleeding had finally paid off. I think. Not really. Attempting to learn how to masturbate by yourself without any other sort of information is bound to lead to... not very nice things. At least for me it would. I actually somehow got my hand stuck inside my penis. Jesus, that was an experience. I have no idea how it even happened.

Then there's my pornhub channel.