Chapters Lyra and Bon Bon Screw Up
Author's Notes
One of the advantages of a long-term relationship is the patterns that emerge. For example, every morning at seven o'clock sharp, Bon Bon would wake up, stretch, and lean over to kiss Lyra good morning (whereupon Lyra would stir, but never wake up). After that, she would shower quickly, and head downstairs to start her day. She would start with some quick organizing; and when she was done with that, she would begin mixing chocolate, and after that, would make breakfast. When she was done, she would head back upstairs and wake up Lyra. Sometimes she would nuzzle her awake, while other times she would kiss her until she woke up. On some days, when Bon Bon's patience was wearing thin, she would drag her out of bed by her tail. And on really good days, Lyra woke up with Bon Bon's head between her legs. Her forelegs, that is. See, Lyra had a strange fascination with raspberries being blown on her stomach. It was one of her many quirks that made her different, yet strangely endearing.
That was, in a nutshell, their normal morning routine.
So it came as a major shock to Bon Bon when she was woken up almost an hour ahead of schedule by a unicorn horn prodding her. She tried to ignore it; but Lyra was relentless, and she finally gave in. “What?” she demanded blearily, turning to face Lyra.
Lyra's eyes were still closed, but she answered, “There's somepony at the door and they won't go away. Go see who it is.”
As if on cue, a loud series of raps sounded through the house.
“Why don't you?” Bon Bon asked grumpily.
Lyra gave a cheeky smile, even as her eyes remained shut. “Because I'm asleep. Duh.”
Groaning, Bon Bon dragged herself out of bed and mentally determined that today she would wake up Lyra by dragging her out of bed by her ear. She stumbled down the stairs, running into a wall once or twice, and grumbling and muttering to herself the whole way. She finally reached the doorway and threw open the door violently.
“What?” she growled. With her eyes still half closed and a really bad case of bed mane, she was quite the scary sight.
The gray pegasus that had woken her up was not put off by her attitude or appearance. She produced a long, thick envelope. “Special delivery!”
Bon Bon's voice was flat. “You woke me up... for that.”
The mailmare smiled broadly, blissfully unobservant of the discomfort she had caused the candy pony (and the terrible annoyance burning in her eyes). “Yep! You told me to deliver this as soon as I could as soon as it got here, and it got here,
Bon Bon muttered something under her breath that vaguely sounded like where she would like to shove said envelope before she settled on grabbing it and examining it. She squinted to read the address label.
Her attitude quickly pulled a 180 and she gave the mailmare a tight hug. “Thank you thank you thank you thank you!...”
This was, surprisingly, the first development to startle the pegasus; and she stood there awkwardly, unsure how she should feel about this. After all, everypony loves hugs; but Bon Bon was kindof taken currently by a mare, and the pegasus definitely preferred stallions. “Just... doing my job?” she said hesitantly.
“Oh, I'm so excited!” Bon Bon pulled back and shoved the envelope back into the mailmare's forehooves. “Can you deliver these to everypony in town?”
“You want me to...”
“Yes! They're our wedding invitations!”
“Wedding invitations?! I love weddings! Congratulations!” (1) And now it was Bon Bon's turn to be seized in a hug she wasn't sure she wanted.
The mailmare's hug was long enough and tight enough for Bon Bon to realize just how much she missed Lyra's personal smell before the gray mare pulled away. “So what were you asking before?”
“I need you to deliver these to every pony here in Ponyville!”
The pegasus cocked her head. “...you want me to open your mail?” she asked.
Bon Bon sighed and reverted back to her regular level of snark. “Go to the next pony's house on your route. Open the mailbox. Open the envelope. Take one invitation out of the envelope. Put it inside the mailbox. Make sure the mailbox is shut. Go to the next house. Repeat.”
The pegasus saluted. “Can do!” She turned and flew off.
Giggling like a filly, Bon Bon shut the door and ran back inside. She sprinted up the stairs and launched herself into the air, landing on the bed—and sending Lyra skyward. The unicorn had not been expecting an early-morning flight, and let out a scream of fright. She crashed back onto the bed, sending the sheets and pillows flying.
She pulled a pillow off her face and glared. “What was that all about?” she demanded. Any further words she tried to get out were muffled by Bon Bon's lips pressed against hers.
A minute later, Bon Bon finally released Lyra. Upon finding herself in control of herself again, Lyra licked her lips contentedly and said, “Not that I'm complaining or anything; but if you're going to wake me up like that again, I'd really like it if you skipped the first part and just went straight to the second.”
“I know, and I'm sorry, but...”
“No, you're not.”
Bon Bon was slightly taken aback, but Lyra still smiled.
“And neither am I,” she finished, gently dragging her hoof under Bon Bon's chin.
Bon Bon suppressed the shudder of pleasure that coursed through her body at her lover's touch, shook her head, and spoke again. “Our invitations came!”
“Invitations?”
Bon Bon nodded excitedly.
Lyra raised an eyebrow. “And you're this excited over a Pinkie party?”
That was interesting. Lyra had never seen her marefriend facehoof so hard.
“No!” Bon Bon sputtered. “Our wedding invitations!”
Lyra's expression went from mildly amused to wide eyed and excited. “Really?”
“Really, really!”
Lyra tackled Bon Bon in a hug, which in and of itself isn't a bad thing; except she had forgotten how close she was to the edge of the bed. Both ponies crashed onto the floor, with Lyra somehow landing on top.
“That's amazing!”
“I know! We have to get ready!”
“We have so much to do... Hey! Can I see them?”
Bon Bon grimaced. “Uh... I kindof just told Derpy to just pass them out. But I remember the design we chose.”
“I know. It was my favorite.” Lyra thought back to that day. It had been a bit messy and awkward at the outset (with a few rocks thrown here and there), but it had ended well, with a nice and tender shot of them together backed by the sunset. She smiled and returned to the present. “I just wanted to hold it, to make it real.”
“Trust me. It's real.”
Lyra lay her head down against the other mare. “It's real,” she repeated.
Bon Bon nodded as she gently ran a hoof through Lyra's mane. “It's real.”
“This calls for a celebration.”
Bon Bon gave Lyra a deadpan look.
“Hey," Lyra defended herself. "We're up early today.”
Bon Bon still glared... but her mask was cracked as Lyra gently kissed her on the forehead, then her nose, then her lips.
“And I can think of the perfect way to celebrate,” Lyra said, before continuing her trail of kisses down her neck, and then her chest, and then...
* * *
“Look, I'm sorry, ok?”
“I know, and it's not entirely your fault, but still!” Bon Bon rushed downstairs in a terrible hurry. She was going to be late opening her shop! It wasn't fair. The chocolate hadn't been mixed yet, the cream hadn't been taken out early enough and would have to thaw longer, she was running out of apples again but what else was new, and most importantly there was no pony behind the counter! She skidded to a halt behind the counter right as the clock struck eight.
“Perfect,” she panted. “Right on time.”
Lyra walked in to stand beside Bon Bon, managing to keep perfectly calm as her marefriend freaked out. “Everything's ready?”
“Everything.”
Lyra smirked as her horn glowed and she flipped the door sign to read 'Open'.
“Knew I was forgetting something,” Bon Bon muttered.
Lyra shook her head at Bon Bon's antics. “It's not like anypony is going to come in this early anyway.”
“It's not that I might miss a customer; it's the principle of the thing! I provide a valuable service to every pony here in Ponyville...”
“To me especially,” Lyra added under her breath as a sly smile crossed her face. She flicked Bon Bon's flank with her tail playfully.
Bon Bon chose to ignore that remark, but her cheeks did take on a slightly reddish hue as she continued, “And so it is of the utmost importance that I am here on time and ready to serve.” She sighed with self importance, before her eyes widened in shock. “And since today is Tuesday, in about five minutes, Mrs. Cake will come in for her regular order of...”
She was cut off by the bell on the door ringing, and the entering pony yelling, “Hiya, Bon Bon!”
“Mrs. Cake has lost weight,” Lyra said under her breath, as her eyes met the smaller, pinker, and (defying all logical explanation) slimmer earth pony.
This earned her a glare and a light kick in the ribs. “Good morning, Pinkie,” Bon Bon said, mentally kicking herself for forgetting an order. She decided to attempt to play it off smoothly. “Are you here for the Cakes' order?”
Pinkie Pie smiled one of her trademark super-wide smiles. “Yep! She usually comes herself, but today she asked me to do it.”
Bon Bon turned to begin putting together her order. Usually, she was on top of things well enough to have checked her schedule and to have had it ready to go, but since she was... 'otherwise occupied' this morning, she had to put it together now, and had to make small talk. “Huh. Is she feeling all right?”
“Yep! Though she did look a little sick after seeing your wedding invitation.”
Bon Bon froze with a tray in her mouth. She knew there was no pleasing some ponies—she'd learned that lesson first hoof a long time ago, having cleaned up more than her share of graffiti and eggs off her apartment walls in Canterlot—but still. Ponyville had been fairly accepting of their relationship, but some things just don't ever change.
“Really?” Lyra asked, trying (and failing) to hide her intense interest in this conversation.
Pinkie wasn't looking at either of them, because she was distracted looking at all the displays on the tall counter (it was almost as tall as she was! That was a lot of chocolate! Ooh—what if you built a house made of chocolate? Could you live in it? You would probably end up eating it all first, huh?) and was oblivious to the reactions of the two mares. “Yeah, and then she wouldn't let me see it. She did show Mr. Cake, though, and he looked kindof funny, too. I wonder why?”
Lyra cleared her throat awkwardly. “Well, Pinkie... You know that we're—me and Bon Bon, that is—we're together, right?” (2)
Pinkie met her eyes, smiled, and nodded expectantly.
“Like, together together?”
Pinkie nodded again, the same expectant smile still spread on her face.
Lyra tried again. “No, like, really, really together. Like super special somepony together?”
Pinkie nodded again. “And?”
“Well... you know... some ponies don't like that.”
Pinkie nodded again, still poised as if waiting for something.
“And... that doesn't seem to bother you.” Lyra's voice trailed off flatly.
“Oh, I don't care who you fall in love with,” Pinkie said dismissively, “I just think it's fantastic when ponies do. And I don't think Mrs. Cake cares too much, either, because she has a cousin in Las Pegasus that also likes mares and she doesn't seem to mind. Besides, I've got bigger things to worry about! Like birthday parties to plan! And late night parties to plan! And making sure we don't run out of sugar again because that was really awkward last time.”
Bon Bon cringed as she remembered that day... Being a fellow baker, she was the only pony in town with the sugar reserves that Sugarcube Corner needed. Unfortunately, Pinkie had come during their lunch break—and it wasn't just food they were eating at the time... (3)
Her thoughts were interrupted by a flash of pink and blue as Pinkie lay up against the counter and glared at Bon Bon with one accusing eye. “But I WILL be offended if you don't invite me to your reception,” she growled.
Bon Bon was too taken aback to speak, so Lyra answered. “Actually, we were hoping you would plan it for us.”
Pinkie Pie did a double backflip from a standing position and cheered in triumph—before tackling the two in a hug.
From her new position on the ground underneath the spazzing party pony, Bon Bon looked over at Lyra (who had also been on the receiving end of the tackle) and raised a question. “Wasn't she in front of the counter a second ago? How'd she get back here?”
“Just... don't ask,” Lyra suggested.
Bon Bon lay there for what felt to her like a long time. It had probably only a few seconds, but she had had enough of undesired hugs today, and the day had barely started. “Pinkie? Let me up.”
“Oh. Sorry.” She popped back to her hooves, still vibrating with happiness. “I just got so excited!”
Bon Bon rolled her eyes as she got up, and turned her attention back to the fruit she was dipping. As she completed that set, something occurred to her. “So... you knew about us being together?”
“Yep! And I remember your anniversary, too!”
Bon Bon turned and gave Lyra a look. “Do you, now?” she asked, talking to Pinkie but still looking at Lyra.
Lyra could take a hint. “I first met you April first, late evening, after one of my street concerts. We didn't actually go out on a date until Nightmare Night, and you didn't let me kiss you until two weeks before Hearth's Warming Eve, and then you let me move in on Hearts and Hooves day the next year.”
Mollified (and more than a little bit pleased), Bon Bon turned back to Pinkie, who had continued talking. “But, I mean, it's blindingly obvious for anypony to notice that you two are together together, like the reeeaally together together. I don't know how they wouldn't have known.”
“Yeah,” Lyra mused, remembering some of their fonder times together. Quite a few involved being out in public, just enjoying each other's company. Nothing too physical, of course. At least, not when there were foals around. “It's not like we've been hiding it or anything.”
Pinkie Pie shook her head. “Nope. You're not good at hiding anything.”
Not sure if she should be offended or pleased (and not wanting to risk another tangent), Bon Bon settled for ignoring that comment. She quickly finished the last part of her order, and set the bag on the counter. “Well, there you are. Have a good day, Pinkie.”
“You too! I'd say 'have a good morning', but it looks like you already have.”
Bon Bon flinched. “What's that supposed to mean?” she asked, masking her embarrassment with anger.
Pinkie playfully ran her tongue along the front of her teeth and flicked her tail suggestively, making both Lyra and Bon Bon blush.
“Wh- what makes you think that?” Bon Bon stammered.
Pinkie grinned. “You mean besides the fact that you both have baaaaad makeout mane and you have little red marks on your right flank and Lyra's tail is a mess and that you didn't have my order ready when I got here? Oh, nothing, really. Have a nice day!” And she turned and trotted out of the store. Even from behind, it was obvious that Pinkie was grinning widely and trying hard not to laugh.
Bon Bon turned to Lyra. “You said I looked fine,” she accused.
“You do!”
“Pinkie obviously thinks differently.”
“Pinkie is Pinkie! She thinks a lot of weird things!”
Bon Bon shook her head. “I'm going to go brush my mane and coat. Hold down the fort while I'm gone. Then you go shower, too. I need you to go shopping this morning and I don't want you broadcasting our love life to the whole town.”
Lyra took her spot behind the counter and sighed. Hopefully this didn't bode badly for the rest of the day.
Author's Note
Spoiler alert: It does.
Lyra and Bon Bon Screw Up
Author's Notes
Lyra is a bit of a strange pony. Like many musicians, she seems to excel in some areas of her life, while others are lacking. For example, she happens to have perfect pitch. She tends to use this to compose music in her head while walking or running errands, rendering her somewhat inattentive to the world around her. Sometimes, her friends would have to physically throw something at her to get her attention.
Today, however, it was clear to see that other ponies were acting strangely. Cloudchaser and Flitter met her eyes... and turned to each other and giggled behind their hooves. Stallions chuckled as she walked by, and some even whistled. Cloud Kicker made the gesture of a celebratory air high wing and a slightly perverted smile, while Blossomforth just facehoofed. (1)
Seeing a familiar face, Lyra waved at the mailmare... who blushed slightly and looked down, didn't watch where she was going, and ended up slamming into the side of a house. Luckily, her bag stayed closed and there was no explosion of letters; just an explosion of feathers and a jumbled mess of gray.
Lyra ran up to her side. “Hey, are you ok?” she asked, reaching out a hoof to help her up.
To her surprise, the mailmare averted her eyes and mumbled something about staying on her route before lifting herself up and flying off rapidly.
Lyra chewed on her lower lip in confusion. Very strange, this was. This was a lot of attention, and she hadn't even gotten to the market yet.
And when she did, it was all the same. Ponies looked at her and either blushed and looked away, or giggled, or snorted, and one outright laughed.
But no one complimented her on her upcoming wedding. (2) This was slightly saddening.
She pulled out her list. For caramel apples, she needed apples, and there was only one pony who grew the kind Bon Bon needed.
As usual, Applejack was standing beside her stall, having a conversation with her younger sister. She seemed unaware of Lyra's approach.
“For the last time, Ah am not donatin' t' the 'Cutie Mark Crusaders Around Equestria in Eighty Days' fund!”
“But what if this is our special talent?” Apple Bloom pleaded. “Pleeeease?”
Applejack pretended to think. “Hmm... Knock off a digit and I'll donate.”
“So, ten bits?” Apple Bloom asked excitedly.
“Ah meant knock off th' one. Now go find somethin' cheaper to get a cutie mark in.”
“Aw...” Apple Bloom scuffed a hoof as she turned away.
Applejack shook her head, and froze when she saw Lyra. “H- Howdy,” she stammered, a faint blush appearing in her cheeks..
“Hi,” Lyra said, confused again. Where did this awkwardness come from? Her mind raced. She had brushed her mane, had brushed her teeth, she wasn't covered in mud, she wasn't wearing pants... (3)
“So... Guessin' yer here fer apples?” Applejack said lamely.
“Yeah,” Lyra said.
Their awkward conversation was cut short by the reappearance of a smaller yellow filly. “Hi, Lyra!” Apple Bloom shouted.
“Hi!” Finally. Somepony who was treating her norma- why was Apple Bloom wandering around her hindquarters? Lyra was certain that she had already shared her cutie mark story—for the fourth time, if she had counted correctly.
But as it turns out, Apple Bloom wasn't looking at the lyre. “Wow, yer flank heals fast!” she said brightly.
“Apple Bloom !” Applejack turned redder than the apples she was selling.
Apple Bloom looked up innocently. “What?”
“Changed my mind. Here,” and Applejack slid over a few coins. “Now git.”
Never one to question free money, Apple Bloom took it and ran.
“Just what I usually get,” Lyra said, trying to bring back some semblance of order to her day. “Plus a dozen Jonagolds and three of the little green ones.”
Applejack didn't seem to make eye contact as she slid over her wares. Lyra paid and left, shaking her head in confusion.
The strange looks and giggles didn't stop. One of the flower ponies even fainted at the sight of Lyra.
That was her tipping point. Lyra straightened herself up and steeled herself. She needed a voice of reason. The voice of somepony who knew too much. The voice of somepony who had her muzzle poked in all the deep gossip.
* * *
“Hey, Rarity,” Lyra said as she entered the boutique. “Hey, quick question. Is it just me, or is everypony acting strange today?”
Rarity looked up from her drawing area and peeked over the top of her red-rimmed glasses. “Strange?” she queried, setting down the quill.
“Yeah,” Lyra nodded. “Ponies keep laughing at me and giggling behind their hooves.”
Rarity tried to keep a smile on her face, but her eyes betrayed the fact that she didn't really want to be having this conversation. “Oh, I wouldn't look too much into that, dearie. It was probably just the invitations you passed out.”
“Really?” Lyra exhaled, relieved. “Well, if it's just everypony happy about our big day, then that isn't much of a problem.”
“Well...” Rarity's eyes seemed to find many interesting things to look at that certainly weren't Lyra. “I don't think it's just the wedding, but perhaps the invitations themselves.”
Lyra cocked her head. “I thought they were sweet,” she said. Just a nice, tender moment between the two. Lyra leaned against Bon Bon, both looking out against a beautiful sunset. It had even appeased the caustic Bon Bon. She had never before, nor since, heard such a “d'aww".
“That's not a term I would have used," Rarity said slowly. "'Daring', maybe. Perhaps 'risqué'.” Rarity looked up at Lyra. “I know you said you would happily use the outfits I made, and often; but I didn't think you meant like that!”
Lyra blinked, confused. They hadn't been wearing anything in the picture. And besides, she hadn't ordered any dresses from... oh.
Oh, no.
Oh, no, no no no.
“Where is the invitation?” Lyra hissed. Rarity scampered (gracefully, of course) over to one of her many desks and found the paper. It glowed blue, and she hesitantly levitated it over. Lyra took it in her own magic, and groaned audibly in horror and awful realization.
See, as one of Ponyville's only seamstresses, Rarity took custom orders. This included special orders. Private orders. Orders that were only to be worn in intimate settings. Tight pieces, seeming more like restraints than clothing.
And that was exactly what the two mares were wearing in the picture, which effect was only accentuated by what polite company would call “accessories”. Metal chains held Lyra's forehooves down, while an iron bar kept her rear legs spread in a position that could only be called “compromising”. Bon Bon rested on top of Lyra's hindquarters, perpendicular to Lyra's body, and the earth pony held a crop in her mouth while a smiling Lyra happily wore its effects. At least, it looked like she was smiling, but it was a bit difficult to tell around whatever that red thing was that was in her mouth. Topping it all off, the headline text screamed, “Theme wedding! Dress in costume or no entry!” in large, block letters.
Lyra's mind flicked back to that particular night and groaned in defeat, facehoofing hard. Bon Bon was going to kill her.
Author's Note
Ya dun goof'd, Lyra; ya dun goof'd.
Lyra and Bon Bon Screw Up
Rarity finished stirring the cup of tea and gently gave it to Lyra.
“Thanks,” Lyra said, taking a little sip and feeling the warm liquid begin to calm her.
“I've found that chamomile does wonders to relax the worried mind,” Rarity said simply, picking up her own cup and taking a sip herself. “So, would you like to talk about it?”
“I think I'd better,” Lyra said slowly. “It always helps, right? Talking about traumatic experiences?”
“Often,” Rarity said.
“Ok,” Lyra said shakily. “It started three weeks ago...”
* * *
“These are beautiful,” Bon Bon said, looking at the invitation. It was simple, really. Just the two of them, sitting in front of a sunset, their tails entwined with Lyra gently resting her head on Bon Bon's shoulder. Yet somehow, it was perfect. “I almost feel bad for making fun of that camera colt, now.”
The Lyra not in the picture also rested her head on Bon Bon as she looked at it, too. “It looks great. You make me so happy, have I told you that?”
Bon Bon replied with a gentle, chaste kiss to the base of Lyra's horn. “Yes. But I still think I'm the lucky one, here.”
Lyra closed her eyes expectantly. See, Bon Bon was uncomfortable showing off her feminine, affectionate side. So after every time she let something like that slip, she would always spout some angry comeback or snarky remark, and this time was no different.
Bon Bon nudged Lyra roughly with her head. “Tell anyone I said that, and you won't get any for a month.”
Lyra shuddered, remembering the last time Bon Bon had made good on such a threat. Those had been the worst two weeks of her life .
“Promise,” Lyra said, bringing a hoof up to cross her heart.
Bon Bon sighed contentedly. “So, we'll send these out to be reproduced, and we'll send them to everypony we know.” She paused. She and Lyra had been together for such a long time, but had never met her parents. Not sure how she should bring this up, she decided to go with what felt normal. “You're going to invite your parents, right?”
Lyra growled.
Bon Bon was slightly taken aback. Lyra never growled. She purred, she whined, she moaned, she squealed, she whimpered, and she giggled; but she never growled.
“Touchy subject?” she asked.
“How did your parents take your... announcement?” Lyra asked.
Bon Bon knew she was referring to coming out with the fact that she had fallen in love with another mare. She sighed and cleared her throat. “It was late at dinner one night.” She put on one of her impressions, and Lyra snuggled closer in anticipation. She loved it when Bon Bon used her different voices. It almost felt as though she were there, watching the scene itself. When she closed her eyes, she almost couldn't tell if it were Bon Bon, or if she were listening to a memory.
“So, Bon Bon. Hearth's Warming Eve is coming up,” Bon Bon said, in her father's voice.
“Yeah, so?” Bon Bon asked in her normal voice.
“Is there anypony you want to, say, bring home for us to meet?
Bon Bon switched her voice to that of her younger brother Caramel Corn, or CC for short. “What? Some colt is dating Bonnie? I pity the fool...”
Bon Bon shot her brother a glare.
“Well, you have been going out a lot at night,” Bon Bon's mother said. “Are you sure there isn't anypony special?”
Bon Bon rolled her eyes, but she had been planning to come clean eventually, and now seemed like a good time. “Maybe.”
Her mother dropped her fork in surprise. “Really? What's his name?”
Bon Bon licked her lips nervously. Planning to do it and actually doing it were two very different things. She steeled herself and spoke. “Well... her name is Lyra.”
“Her?”
Bon Bon nodded.
“You're going out with another mare?”
Bon Bon nodded.
“And she's ok with this?”
Bon Bon nodded, a bit more uncertainly this time. That had not been an expected response. 'Was she ok with this' What was that supposed to mean, anyway?
“And now you're each other's very special somepony?”
Bon Bon nodded with finality. She braced herself for various reactions—anger, surprise, rage, disgust...
But she hadn't been expecting celebration. Bon Bon's mother squealed in happiness and joyfully hugged Bon Bon's father. “She has a very special somepony!”
“I can't believe it! That's amazing!” he yelled in celebration, returning the hug. Bon Bon's mother was bouncing in excitement, whooping and celebrating.
“You know I'm sitting right here, right?” Bon Bon said. She turned her eyes to CC, who was obviously trying to avoid saying something. Her eyes narrowed. “Say it. I dare you.”
“Wow... if a mare will go out with you , I won't have any trouble finding one!” Laughing, he quickly ducked as Bon Bon threw her fork at him.
“So... they celebrated?” Lyra asked for confirmation.
Bon Bon nodded. Then, realizing that Lyra couldn't see from her position, she responded vocally. “Yep. Guess they thought I'd be single forever, so they nearly wet themselves in excitement when I told them I found you.” She paused. “I think my mother actually did when I told them you moved in with me... My dad stepped outside, but I heard him shouting in celebration, and I'm pretty sure he tried to do a backflip because he came in limping.” She shrugged. “I guess that's my fault. Sometimes I am a bit... I think the foal-friendly term is 'brash'. So when I found you... they thought it seemed too good to be true.”
“Now that I will take as a compliment.” Lyra wiggled even closer and wrapped her forelegs around her lover. “Because I kindof think we're too good to be true, too.”
Bon Bon paused expectantly. Wait a couple seconds, and Lyra would reciprocate.
Sure enough, she did. She released Bon Bon and rolled, laying down with her head top of Bon Bon's back, almost as if she were at a psychiatric appointment. “My dad's dead, and my mother hoped I'd be single forever,” Lyra muttered. “She kicked me out of the house when I told her I liked mares.” She rolled onto her stomach, pulled Bon Bon in closer, and buried her head further into her ribs, as if fending off bad memories. “She wouldn't even hug me good bye when she did...”
Bon Bon fought the urge to roll her eyes again. Lyra was a very affectionate pony, and expressed her love through physical touch. The two were one and the same in her mind. If Bon Bon ever pulled away from a hug or cut a kiss short, Lyra would wilt and instantly run through a mental list of things she might have done wrong to anger her. It sounded silly to Bon Bon, who much preferred spending time doing things together to express her love, but Lyra had probably been emotionally crushed by that lack of farewell contact.
The bright side was, Bon Bon always knew what to do to calm her down. She herself rolled onto her side, pulled Lyra up closer so more of their bodies were in contact with each other, placed Lyra's head against her chest, and brought up a hoof to stroke Lyra's mane tenderly, making sure to breathe deeply so Lyra could feel her breath against her mane. She was quickly rewarded for her efforts, and Lyra's breathing soon began to calm. When it had returned to normal, Bon Bon spoke again. “So are you going to invite her?” she asked.
“Not with this invitation,” Lyra said bitterly. “This is special. She'll probably stick it on the wall and throw darts at it or something.” She raised her voice in a rambling, mocking imitation of her mother. “'So unnatural and so wrong you'll never be happy without a stallion and you'll never have foals and you'll never give me grandchildren and you'll be such a failure nopony will hire a freak like you two mares is just weird and you're wrong and...'” and her voice trailed off to derisive mumbling.
Suddenly, her ears perked up.
Bon Bon's hoof froze in midair, no less than three red flags going up in her mind. “Oh, no.” Bon Bon knew what whatever was coming, it would end strangely. “Whatever you're thinking, it's not a good idea.”
Lyra pouted. “But you haven't even heard it yet.”
“Do you ever have good ideas?”
Bon Bon let out an involuntary gasp as Lyra gently brushed her hoof against her inner thigh. “I fell in love with you, didn't I?”
Bon Bon stammered a reply. “That's not a good idea. I'm a bad pony. You should stop.”
“That's not what you were saying last night,” Lyra snickered, earning herself a slightly harsh flick to her horn.
But a few seconds later, just like Lyra knew she would, Bon Bon sighed and relented. “Fine, fine... I'll bite. What is your new idea?”
“She thinks we're weird... we'll show her just how weird we are.” Lyra grinned. “I'll get the suits, you get the crop.”
* * *
In the present day, Lyra turned back to Rarity. “And then we pulled out our special together box, and we, uh... 'had some fun' and took some pictures of the aftermath.”
“So those markings were real?” Rarity couldn't help but ask.
Lyra nodded distractedly. “They're not deep, but they're real. We're not stupid, you know.”
“They looked real.” Rarity raised an eyebrow as something else occurred to her. “Special together box? Is that what they're calling my intimate designs these days?”
Lyra didn't answer that one. She set her empty teacup down and began to pace frantically. Now that her tea was gone, her body resumed freaking out. “Those pictures were only for my mother! I just wanted to shock her! I didn't think anypony else would see them! Oh, Bon Bon is going to be so embarrassed! Well, I'm embarrassed, but she's going to die of shame! I'm going to die too—she's going to kill me! No. On second thought, she's going to kill me, bring me back to life and make me clean up the mess, and then kill me again. We'll both be dead!”
“Well, it can't be too bad for her. She is the one on top, after all.” Rarity paused, slightly morbid curiosity getting the better of her. “You were the only one with crop marks. Do you ever... you know... switch roles?”
Lyra didn't even pause her pacing and answered absentmindedly. “Tried it once. It wasn't as fun. I think that's only one of two or three times we've ever used our safe word. But what are we going to do? Everypony's seen it, everypony has been laughing at us...” She gasped. “Bon Bon doesn't know!” She turned to the white unicorn. “Rarity, could you...”
“Long, black, identity-concealing cloaks?” Rarity turned and pulled that very item out of one of her many storage chests. “Way ahead of you, darling!”
“...actually, I was going to ask if you could go get her, but that works too.”
* * *
“Bon Bon!”
The earth pony mare looked up. Her eyebrow raised as she took in Lyra's strange apparel. “Did Nightmare Night come early this year? Don't tell me—you're going as the grim reaper. And where's the stuff I asked you to get?”
“No time. You have to come down to Rarity's! There's something important you have to see.”
Bon Bon turned back to her work. “The only thing I want to see is a few more sales before lunch time.”
Lyra had the decency to look around to make sure there were no foals around before responding. “And I want to see you on our bed on your back with your legs spread invitingly, but we don't always get what we want. Now put this on and let's go!”
* * *
There was no bloodshed at the house of Rarity that day.
Well, no physical bloodshed, anyway.
“You incompetent foal !”
Though it wasn't from lack of trying. Bon Bon was suspended midair in Rarity's blue magic, but that didn't stop her from swinging wildly at her marefriend, trying to punch her, or at the very least cause her great physical harm. Lyra had taken to cowering behind one of the many ponnikins, only raising her head barely.
“You said those were just for your mom!” Bon Bon shouted.
Lyra looked up ever so slightly from her cowering position. “They were supposed to be, but-”
“But nothing! The whole entire town has seen us! How does this not bother you?”
“It does, but in my defense, you're on top; you should be less embarrassed tha-”
“Shut up! The wedding's off! There will be no sex—there will be no physical contact!—until we straighten this out!”
Rarity stepped in, which was a good thing, as Lyra looked as though she had been hit by a train and all the happiness in her life had just been sucked right out. Which, in a manner of speaking, in her mind, it had.
“Now, Bon Bon, let's not overreact here...”
“Overreacting?" Bon Bon spoke to Rarity, but kept her glare fixed firmly on what little of Lyra she could see. "I am underreacting ! My life has been ruined! Everything has been ruined!”
“Well, I'm not exactly enjoying this myself!” Lyra retorted angrily, with tears starting to trail down her face. “If you don't remember, I was on that invitation too! And I was on bottom! How do you think I feel?”
“I don't know. Stupid? Because I'm pretty sure this is all your fault!”
“I wasn't the one with the crop!”
“If you weren't such a-”
Rarity had had enough bickering. Splashes of water to the face does wonders to cool down two angry mares.
Or, you know, divert their anger to a new target.
“How does that help?” Bon Bon demanded. “How?”
Rarity smiled primly. “Well, it's quite simple. Now, you're not focused on each other, you're focused on me. I think I can fix your whole situation. I'll have to call in a few favors, but I think I can get this back to normal and the wedding can go on as planned.” After all, if weddings were canceled, so were orders for wedding dresses; and making those was her favorite part of any ceremony. Except for eating wedding cake. That, however, was classified information.
Bon Bon's eye twitched. “Then share, oh wise one.”
"Very well." Rarity set Bon Bon down and quickly ran a hoof through her own mane to make sure it still looked fabulous. "I assume you have an original invitation that you wished to distribute?"
Bon Bon glared at Lyra. "No, actually. That got sent away to Canterlot for publishing."
Rarity frowned and dropped her hoof. "Well, that does throw off my idea just a bit... Might the pony who took the picture have the negative still?"
"Maybe," Bon Bon said, "But as I recall, his last words were, 'if I never see you two again it'll be too soon'."
Rarity nodded. "Ah... Perhaps you could persuade him differently."
Bon Bon's eyes narrowed into daggers. "I am not going to make out with Lyra in front of a colt just to get him to give us the negative."
Rarity reared back in shock. "That was not my idea at all! I was going to suggest explaining the situation and hoping that chivalry is not totally dead!"
"But can I at least have a hug?" Lyra asked, raising a hoof in what she hoped was an innocent, 'I-need-some-comfort' manner. She was ignored.
"Oh. Like that."
"Yes."
* * *
"No."
"What do you mean, 'no'?" Rarity asked.
"I meant what I said," the colt said, crossing his forelegs. "They was nothin' but trouble, and I don't want to help them at all."
"Not even a little bit?" Rarity asked, leaning forward and batting her eyelashes. "I'm sure a kind-hearted stallion like you could find the generosity to..."
"Sorry, filly; I don't swing that way."
"What if I-"
"And I hate clothes, especially the gaudy rags you make."
Rarity recovered quickly, but Lyra could see her jaw tighten. "All right, then. Come with me, and allow me to propose a counter offer."
The colt cocked his head and frowned. "Meaning?"
In response, Rarity grabbed his tail with her magic and dragged him, ignoring his numerous loud and vocal protests, into the back room. Suddenly, the room fell eerily silent.
Lyra and Bon Bon looked at each other nervously. Lyra was the first to break the silence. "What do you think they're doing back there?" she asked hesitantly.
"I think I'm afraid to ask," Bon Bon said.
Soon, the door opened again. Rarity walked out, looking as prim and proper as she normally did. The camera colt, on the other hoof, was about as pale as Rarity's normal coat color, and shivered uncontrollably, as if in a blizzard only he could feel.
"And you'll get started on those new invitations right away?" Rarity asked.
"Y- yes, ma'am," he said shakily. "You'll have enough for the whole town by tomorrow morning."
"Oh, good. Pleasure doing business with you, my good colt," Rarity said calmly.
As they exited the shop, Bon Bon couldn't help but speak up. "What happened to hoping for chivalry?"
Rarity answered without missing a beat. "Sometimes, dearie, a lady simply must get things done. Now, phase two begins early tomorrow, so go home, get some sleep..." She leaned in closer, "And at least give Lyra a hug good night, can we?"
"She gets a single foreleg hug, does that count?"
Rarity shrugged as Lyra suppressed a squeal of joy. "I suppose it will be sufficient."
Author's Note
(nothing's quite so embarrassing as forgetting to hit the publish button... this should have dropped yesterday)
Lyra and Bon Bon Screw Up
Early the next morning, Zecora was trotting through town, wearing her usual dark cloak (a necessity this time of year as protection from the various dangers in the Everfree Forest) when she saw two ponies also wearing dark cloaks, walking quickly and leaning against walls, almost as if they wished to not be seen.
Zecora frowned. “They wear, like me, a long black smock. I wonder if I am being mocked...”
But that idea disappeared when she saw them walk as stealthily as possible (which wasn't very stealthy at all, to be perfectly honest) into the Carousel Boutique.
“Ah,” Zecora said, “now I understand. They wish to wear more than just something bland.” She paused again and then giggled. “Oh, Zecora, you crazy cow, I think you insulted yourself just now.” Suddenly satisfied with her morning, she continued walking towards her destination.
* * *
Inside the boutique, Lyra and Bon Bon pulled off the cloaks.
“Oh, thank Celestia,” Bon Bon said, fanning herself with a hoof. “I was sweating to death in there.”
“Well, it is summer,” Rarity said, now casting a slightly distasteful look at the cloak on the ground. “But that's neither here nor there. It's time for step two.”
“What's step two?” Lyra wanted to know.
“It's where I call in a few favors. I've already picked up the new invitations. Now, I need a few of my friends but first—Where are you getting your wedding dresses designed?”
“Uh... We were kindof hoping you'd do it?” Lyra said hesitantly, “But since you're doing so much for us now I don't know if we should force that on you as well...” Her voice trailed off as Rarity turned and walked quickly into one of her many back inspiration rooms and shut the door firmly behind her.
Bon Bon frowned. “Lyra, look what you did. You scared her off.”
“I didn't mean to!” Lyra protested, but any further defense was cut off as they heard the sound of excited squealing from behind the closed door. Soon, Rarity reemerged, looking as poised as ever.
“Very well, I suppose I could fit such a thing into my tight schedule. Now, to make sure there actually is a wedding, I'll need to call in the, as they say, 'big guns'.”
Bon Bon felt that same chill run up her spine that she got whenever Lyra suggested an idea, and silently hoped that Rarity wasn't completely insane.
* * *
“Oh, Rainbow Dash?” Rarity called.
Rainbow poked her head over the side of the cloud and blearily rubbed her eyes. “What?” she asked through a yawn.
“How would you like to be given a two-hours free pass out of any modeling assignment? Valid at any time.”
Rainbow's yawn stopped abruptly and her eyes widened ever so slightly. “I'm listening...”
* * *
“All right. Rainbow's here. Now what?” Bon Bon asked.
“Now we need Pinkie Pie,” Rarity answered.
“Then why are you here and not at Sugarcube Corner?” Bon Bon demanded.
Rarity lowered her voice conspiratorially. “Because Pinkie Pie doesn't follow normal rules, darling.”
Lyra looked confused and looked towards Rainbow Dash for clarification, but the pegasus merely nodded her assent.
“Watch this.” Rarity took a step back and raised her voice. “Oh, what a shame!” she wailed, bringing a hoof up and resting it on her forehead melodramatically. “Oh, what an awful situation I have found myself in! Oh, if only Pinkie Pie were here! She would know what to do to set this whole thing right!”
“Why are you talking like that? You look fine!”
Both Lyra and Bon Bon jumped as Pinkie Pie popped her head out of one of the many trunks in the room.
Bon Bon raised a shaky hoof and pointed. “But how did... but she...”
Pinkie misinterpreted their confusion at her means of appearance as confusion as to how she had known to come so quickly, and gave them a large wink as she climbed out. “I'm like Super Stallion. I know when I'm needed.”
* * *
Rainbow Dash raised a hoof and knocked on the door. It soon opened, revealing an earth pony mare.
“Hello, random citizen,” Rainbow Dash said cheerfully.
Berry Punch's expression flattened. “I suppose I've been called worse,” she mumbled. Then she looked over, noticed Bon Bon next to Rainbow Dash, and her eyes narrowed. She seemed about to slam the door, but Rainbow Dash continued, as if not noticing her reaction.
“Recently, you may have received a wedding invitation of a rather questionable nature.”
“Oh, you don't say,” Berry growled sarcastically. “That was the most awkward conversation I've had with Pinchy since she asked what estrus was.” She raised a hoof accusingly at Bon Bon, as if ready to rip her a new one, but Rainbow Dash continued on.
“This was, of course, not intentional.”
Berry grumbled something under her breath. Bon Bon caught something about places she could shove that invitation, and wasn't sure if she should be aroused or disturbed.
“See, Pinkie Pie and I were trying to set up a good prank, and swapped the real invitation for a joke one. We didn't realize that it was the one going to the printing shop, though, and so you and the rest of the town ended up being unintentionally pranked.” Rainbow reached into her saddlebag and pulled out another rolled paper. “This is the real invitation you should have gotten. As you can see, no costumes or anything like that happening here. The only theme here is a happy, family-friendly wedding with plenty of food and everypony is invited.”
Berry Punch's eyes stayed narrowed as she grabbed the paper and unrolled it, but as she looked over it, her expression softened. “That's... sweet,” she said softly, taking in the picture of the two mares in front of the sunset.
“Yeah," Rainbow said. "We're really sorry about that and we've surely learned our lesson.”
Bon Bon was amazed that she had managed to say that with a straight face.
Berry Punch considered this answer, but then her eyes narrowed again. “How did you know they were sending an invitation, anyway?”
Rainbow brushed a hoof off on her chest and examined it nonchalantly. “A true master pranksteress never reveals her secrets.”
Berry nodded, suspicious of that answer, but she knew she wouldn't get another.
“Welp,” Rainbow said, turning to leave, “we've got the rest of the town to get to, so we'd better get a move on. Have a nice day, random citizen!”
Shaking her head, Berry shut the door.
Rainbow nudged Bon Bon as they walked down to the next house. “See? That wasn't so bad.”
“I'm sure...”
“Oh, look on the bright side. One down, only another hundred or so to go!”
Bon Bon sighed. “Fine...”
Rainbow paused as she lifted a hoof up to knock on the next door. “You know, I wonder how Pinkie Pie would answer that question.”
* * *
“At least, that's what we thought at first , but since Twilight had forgotten to bring the oatmeal, we ended up using barley instead and that can give you some massive farts but that's not important right now since Rarity decided that silk would be less than ideal to replace the cotton trim on his dress and so she borrowed some material from Davenport but he accidentally...”
“Never mind! Thanks for the invitation! I gotta go!” And Shoeshine slammed her door shut.
Lyra looked at Pinkie Pie. “Are you doing that on purpose?”
“Doing what?” Pinkie asked innocently as she turned and bounced happily down the porch stairs.
“You know,” Lyra said. “Making really long, rambling answers that mean nothing so ponies get fed up and don't ask about how you 'knew' about the invitations?”
Pinkie shrugged. “I have no idea what you're talking about. Next house!”
* * *
And as long and as hard as it was, Rarity's plan actually seemed to work. By the end of the day, Lyra and Bon Bon had received more compliments than they had ever dreamed of receiving, and after the 'explanation', met with more smiles than frowns. Pinkie and Rainbow Dash had been absolved of any wrongdoing, and it had been chalked up to 'another harmless prank' and would soon be forgotten entirely.
As the two mares returned to Bon Bon's house, they walked side by side, with their tails entwined. Ponyville was a strange place, to be sure; but it was warm, welcoming, friendly, and most of all, it was home.
Author's Note
Pinkie says: Don't leave just yet! We still have a reception to go to!
Lyra and Bon Bon Screw Up
Lyra couldn't keep a smile off her face as she looked around at the room. Pinkie Pie had really outdone herself this time. She had stacked cakes of contrasting colors at least a pony's height on each of the tables, placed more streamers than she had ever seen before, provided more colors of punch than Rainbow's mane, set up tables specific to the various desserts, and she had even made personalized cupcakes with their colors and cutie marks. It was all rather glorious to behold.
She was refiling her cup for at least the fourth time when she felt a pony come up next to her.
“Lyra?” Bon Bon asked.
“What?”
“Is that your mother?”
Lyra turned and laughed... until she recognized the light blue unicorn mare approaching. Her breath caught in her throat and she dropped her cup, not even noticing or caring that she spilled some blue onto her dress.
Rarity did, though, and she fainted. But that's not too important right now.
“Breathe, Lyra,” Bon Bon said, bringing a hoof up and placing it on her back.
“I didn't think she would actually come,” Lyra said, beginning to hyperventilate and backpedal. “She's here to mock me, I just know it!”
“At least she's not in costume,” Bon Bon muttered.
That brought an image to mind that made Lyra almost die right then and there of horror.
But dying would have to wait. Lyra's mother walked right in front of her and stopped.
“Hello, Lyra,” she said. “Aren't you going to give me a hug on your special day?”
Never one to turn down a hug, Lyra leaned forward and wrapped her forelegs around her mother. Bon Bon quickly noticed that her mother didn't reciprocate.
“I'm so glad you're here," Lyra said. "I didn't know you supported me,” Lyra said breathlessly.
“Oh, I don't.”
Bon Bon winced. Lyra flinched and pulled back.
“I still think you're making a mistake. When I got the invitation, yes, I was repulsed that my daughter would do something so unnatural. Sitting with another mare in front of a sunset, looking like you're trying to have a normal relationship, I was half tempted to hang it on the wall and use it as target practice."
Bon Bon blinked. What a strange choice of words.
"But looking closer at it, I could see just how happy you were.” She sighed. “And, even if I still think you're a freak, at least you are happy and enjoying yourself, and I guess that will have to do.” She turned to Bon Bon. “Take care of her, all right?” And with that, she turned back to Lyra, gave her a very brief hug for real this time, and left.
Bon Bon turned to Lyra. “That was... pleasant.”
Lyra still tried to catch her breath. “Are you kidding me? Coming from my mom, she might as well have kissed you!” Lyra paused. “No, I'm the only one that can kiss you. Uh... That means she approves of you! Of us!”
Bon Bon rolled her eyes. “She shows it funny.”
“She hugged me again!" Lyra squealed. "Of her own free will!”
"Yeah," Bon Bon smiled. "Guess this whole invitation thing worked out pretty well."
"Yeah," Lyra agreed, celebrating by grabbing herself another cup of punch. "I guess it did."
"That being said, let's not take any more of those pictures."
Lyra gave an exaggerated groan. "But Bonsy, you look so good in that saddle."
A devious grin spread across Bon Bon's face. “You're going to settle for me in that saddle? You need to think bigger, filly! I've got big plans for tonight. Stuff that will blow your mind.”
“What happens tonight?” Lyra asked innocently.
Bon Bon gave Lyra a quick tap upside her head. “Wedding night, Lyra. Use your brain.”
Lyra thought... and then a smile spread across her face.
Life was good.
Author's Note
Welp, that's about it for this story. It was meant to be short and sweet and just a little bit saucy, and I think I somewhat succeeded.
Problem is, I kindof like this world I've created. Would anyone like seeing these two get into a few other situations?
