What I'm Looking For...

"Alright. Here we go... Hello there... You. Heh. I'm-uh- Redheart. But you can just call me Red, really. Heh. Uh... Let's see... Um... Oh! I signed up for this dating site because, well, I thought it would work out better than walking up to people at the bar and saying 'hey, I make a living out of putting my hands in people's stomachs, wanna dance?'. Heh-heh-ehhhh... "

"What's up everyone!? I'm Cloudchaser!"

"And I'm Flitter!"

"We're twins. And we really like doing everything together."

"That's why Cloud and I signed up for this dating website together. Same profile and all."

"Mhm. You get one of us, you get both of us."

"That's how it works with us."

"Uh, yeah... My name's Sunset Shimmer, I guess... Look, I don't really need this. I'm just doing this as something to pass the time. I don't need a dating site to find someone. I'm not some sheltered loser. But, yeah, here I am."

"Sup dick-lickers. Gilda here. I signed up here because -well- what else does anyone sign up for this thing crap except to find some ass? Take a good look at me, take it all in... Yeah."

"Heh... Hey there boys, or girls. It really doesn't bother me either way. I'm flexible... My name's Fleur-de-lis, or Fleur for short. Or, pretty much anything you want to call me. I could go either way, honestly. I decided to put myself on this dating site because, well, I get so-so lonely. I just had to try and find someone to cuddle up with and--heh... Oh my."

"What sort of person am I looking for? Ffff... Huh... I guess I really hadn't thought about that. I guess someone who'd understand my work ethic. My job is my life, so, understanding that is a big thing for me. It would also help if they really liked kids."

"Person we're into? Flitter?"

"Hmmm... OH! Athletic."

"Just what I was thinking. Someone who's strong."

"And fast."

"Really fast."

"Mmm, not too fast though."

"Right. Someone between fast and way too fast."

"What else?"

"Someone that knows how to cook."

"But neither of us know how to--OOOOOH. Smart!"

"The kind of person I'm looking for? Ugh. If I had to say I would go with someone that doesn't ask stupid questions. I prefer to get to the point and get whatever we're planning over and done with. Don't like the direct approach? Walk away right now. I don't have time to waste on half-whits."

"Who I'm into? Rough players. It also really helps if they have some great gear and know how to use it. I don't roll with half-chubs or mosquito bites. Simple as that."

"What's my ideal person? Heh... Y-O-U... I'm more leaning towards doing what I have to do to make you happy."

"My idea of a perfect date would be a daylight jog in the park before a light in fat picnic where we'd have a talk about our week. Practice, normal, and good for the body. Great, right?"

"Perfect date?"

"I don't know about that one..."

"How about--"

"--Skinny dipping after dark?"

"Going streaking in the park?"

"Even better! But, I don't know if that's 'perfect', you know?"

"Right... How about watching cloud reflections on the water from a fancy restaurant?"

"Perfect! Always thinking on the ball."

"The kind of date I'd like is -uh... Something... cool. Yeah. Like... skydiving into a shark tank with your hands tied. You know, cool stuff. Nothing else... Can we just move on?"

"I'd kill for a sky show. Planes darting and bucking through the air at death defying-- I mean... Fucking. Yeah. Hard rough fucking. Plain and flat."

"Moonlit dining on the beach by a lovely chateau. Nothing could be more romantic than that for a date. Heh. Sorry, I get a little dreamy when I think about the romantics."

"The one thing I can't stand? Piercings and tattoos. They're just so -uhhh. I hate even thinking about it. They're like little cuts into your --uhhhhh... Just, no. I can't stand them."

"What we hate the most?"

"That's an easy one. You wanna take this one?"

"Sure. We can't stand bird-dogging."

"Really. Garbage bird-dogs. It's completely without class or style."

"Couldn't agree more. If you bird-dog, don't even bother with us. We have respect."

"Something I hate? I can name people pretty easy, but... I would have go with I hate dirty tricks. No matter what someone does, if you do it unfair or by making someone go against you from the start on an unfair playing field, you're scum. Cheating is fine if you play in 'fair', but I can't stand when cheats in the most underhanded ways. Have some sort of class for your own good."

"Ugh... I hate Careful Carols. You know the people. Too scared to take a risk or too unsure to make up their mind? I hate them. REALLY hate them."

"Oh, I couldn't possibly hate anything about anyone. A little fire in a relationship never hurt anyone... And if it did, well... A little pain is good for you~~. But, I will say I don't much care for liars."

"I guess that's it. So -right?- drop me a line if you want to go out or meet up, heh. And... That... is... all... Heh-heh-ehhh..."

"That's it!"

"Don't wait up to call us. We'll be waiting!"

"That it? Great. Bye, the information to contact me is-- You know where it is..."

"So call me any time if you've got the guts and we can see to a one-night stand, 'right? Cool. Check 'ya."

"That's all the time I have. Kisses. I'll be waiting for your call all night."

On a daily basis, the site gets about forty video submissions. Retakes, new entries, responses, things of that kind. But, after awhile, the manager has to take down some videos from lack of activity or complaints. Whether it's because a video is too sexual, too personal, or just too strange for possible clients. Cuts have to be made somewhere, and some girls and guys never get that first or second date.

Sad, but true. However, those people maybe aren't meant for the online dating world. Maybe, just maybe... They'll find their luck better in the most strange of circumstances with the most unlikely of people to be put to chance with. Who knows? That's something only the fates know for sure. If you're willing though, there are six ladies out there who are in need of a little fate. They may not know it yet, but fate has dealt them just the hand they needed... even if it wasn't the one they wanted.