Twilight's unfaithful student

by Trigger_Finger

Rating: mature
Tags: Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Sex, Twilight Sparkle, Slice of Life, Human
Length: 858467

After gaining her first student, Twilight finds that it may be a little much to handle

After an accidental teleportation spell and gaining her first 'faithful' student, Twilight Sparkle realizes that taking on the role of a mentor might be a little more difficult that she may have first thought, that and he's kind of cute.

The cover photo was composed/created by Panzertank and he is an absolute boss and deserves more thanks than I can give.

Edited by SolidFire, so big thanks to him and if you liked it, make sure to tell him he did a good job, because he deserves a pat on the back

NOTICE: I don't know how it started, or why, but for whatever reason, it seems a lot of people think the main character is some sort of soldier. He IS NOT any kind of military. Yes he owns a gun, that does not mean he's some kind of USMC or something. He is just a regular guy (Kind of). I hope that clears some things up

Published 2013-09-16 23:30:03 UTC
Last updated 2019-03-20 00:11:41 UTC

Chapter 1

"I hate Mondays..."

Monday, September 16th , 2013:

Everfree forest…

The air was muggy and humid, the dark forest seemed calm and still as I lay there on the ground, face down. The sleeves on my M81 camouflage jacket were rolled up, allowing wet moisture to dampen my arms and give my skin an uncomfortable feeling.

As the cool dampness seeped into my matching cargo pants, I groaned and tried to roll over. Dirt and muddy grit was smeared onto my face as I continued to slowly roll onto my back. I groaned painfully as I finally flopped over. ‘Whatever that was… I don’t want to do it again,’ I thought to myself. I moved my right hand over my face and tried to wipe away the grit and sticky wetness, only managing to smear it more. The slimy ground residue clung to my hands like some sort of viscous snot booger.

I swatted my hand in the air several times before the residue finally flung off and I flopped my head against the ground, the grass beneath me making an awful and gut wrenching squelching sound as my weight pressed into it.

My jacket used to only be wet on my chest, but due to the way I was laying, my back soon became soaked as well. Guess I didn't think that one through very well.

I brought both hands to my face and began massaging my cheeks before taking my right hand away and looking to my wrist watch. I used my left thumb to press the light button and the screen lit up with a bright blue neon glow.

The watch arms never worked, even when I bought the damn thing, but the digital readouts were always bang on the money. It read that it was September 16th, Monday. It also stated that it was 11:30pm. “Great… my Monday isn't even over yet,” I muttered groggily as I stood up. It took a moment, but my eyes soon adjusted to the dark surroundings.

Wherever I was, the trees were creepy as all fucking hell… and eerie. The forest creaked and groaned silently without actually moving, the trees simply stood deathly still yet made noises as if in some sort of torrential storm. I got up and started to walk forward but tripped over something which gave a clacking sound as my work boots hit it and I fell face first back into the awful ground. “WHAT THE FU… oh hey Applebloom…” I muttered as I snatched the rifle off the ground. Applebloom… a dame and a half. SKS with walnut brown stock and flip up bayonet… something about her just made me feel… safe.

I held it close, letting the side of the cool black barrel rest against my face, seemingly making my headache go away for a moment’s time before quickly returning.

I let out a long yawn as I stretched but stopped abruptly as I heard howling in the near distance. My eyes went wide as shivers went down my spine. ‘This can’t be good,’ I thought to myself as I quickly positioned Applebloom in both hands, stock plate resting against my shoulder, before racking back the bolt. The sound of the bolt slamming shut echoed in the night air, but at the same time I felt safer. “Locked, cocked and ready to rock!” I announced before looking around. Just as I stood to my full height, my senses flared out of control. Everything smelt fresher, my vision sharpened and everything around me seemed to echo loudly, making it somewhat difficult to pinpoint exact sound origins.

I flipped out the bayonet on my SKS and spun around, only to see green eyes peering at me. “Holy hell in a handbasket…” I muttered as more eyes illuminated in the dark forest depths. Suddenly a set of eyes began approaching and I leveled my rifle’s sights in between the set of eyes.

I waited until my vision could make it out, only to realize that choice was a horrible one to make. The creature in front of me was a god awful looking… something rather. It was kind of like a wolf but made completely out of wood. It also had a horrid stink that fumed in the air around its entire body.

“You’re one ugly mother fucker,” I muttered in a perfect Schwarzenegger voice. The beast snarled and leapt at me, tackling me to the ground and snapping at my face with its powerful jaws. The force of the tackle knocked the SKS rifle from my grip, sending it tumbling across the ground

I yelled out in anger as I clenched my fist, slamming a punch into its snout with my bare knuckles. The nightmarish creature yipped as it staggered back into the dark depths. Suddenly the entire forest echoed with a single unison howl. “I’m so fucked…” I whispered to myself as my heart began to race. I rolled to the side then scrambled to my feet as I reached for my only hope, Applebloom.

I snatched the rifle off the ground and readied it as the first wolf charged at me. I rushed it, leaping through the air before stabbing my rifle downwards, driving the bayonet tip right through its skull. As my feet touched the ground, the wolf’s body slumped by my feet. “Oh, you want to play rough, let’s play rough mother fuckers!” I yelled just as another one charged me.

I leveled the sights on my rifle and popped off three consecutive shots. The rifle’s muzzle emitted a blinding flash that singed blurs into my eyes, tainting my vision. 125g ballistic tipped bullets flew through the air and all connected with the creature’s hideous face, blowing its wooden skull into splinters. I felt a shiver go down my spine as I sensed the presence of something approaching me. I pivoted my stance and a wolf latched onto my arm, chomping down tightly with its razor sharp fangs.

“GAH… MOTHER FUCCKKKKERRR!” I roared in pain as I tried furiously to swing the wolf off my arm, but it wouldn’t budge. Another wolf charged at me and I swung the wolf currently latched to my arm at the charging wolf. Both their bodies collided, sending the second wolf tumbling away but the first one still stayed clamped to my forearm.

“FUCK YOU!” I swore as I swung its body against a nearby tree, shattering its body into several parts. My arm burned in pain and barely allowed me to move it. I readied the heavy rifle in my right arm with one hand, placing the butt of the stock against my shoulder and resting the rifle’s foregrip on my left arm’s elbow. My arm seared in pain, but it was manageable for the time being.

“Alright assholes… you want me? Come and fuckin' get me!” I roared. They were about to make their move when suddenly a hissing noise could be heard throughout the forest. Not even a moment passed as they all whined fearfully before scampering away into the deep, dark forest.

I lowered my aim and watched in shock as they all scampered away. As I went to make a shitty pun, I felt my arm flare in pain. I winced and looked to my bleeding arm, only to see sharp wooden fangs protruding out of my forearm. “Great… well… this makes my Monday…” I muttered with humor in my voice.

Without looking, I noticed an approaching presence behind me and my eyes went wide. I spun around to see a cloaked, four legged figure trotting towards me. I began to level the rifle but it brought up a hoof and motioned for me not to shoot.

I could’ve sworn that my mind was playing tricks on me… but then again I had just fought wooden wolves so... “Please do not hurt me, for you have yet to see.” The voice spoke in a rhyme.

“See… see what?!” I asked aggressively.

“See my face, if you wish to stay in this place.” She spoke another rhyme.

“Enough fucking rhyming… what the fuck do you want?!” I demanded. There was a faint laugh as she tossed back her hood, the light of the shimmering moon revealed a… zebra! ‘Wait a minute… zebras don’t talk… do they…’ I thought to myself. I had never been to Africa, but I figured they were just like a weird colored horse, so that meant they couldn’t talk… right?

“Okay… I’ll stop rhyming… but take my word, it is not safe here. You should come with me back to my home so I can help you,” she suggested. She kinda sounded like she was from Africa or something, but then again… I guess Zebras were from Africa.

“Help me?” I asked curiously, wondering what exactly I needed. She pointed to my still bleeding arm and I chuckled. “Oh yeah…” I chuckled then sighed, “Right… I kinda forgot about that.” I muttered, having completely forgotten about my injured arm. ‘How the hell do I completely forget about my arm… I mean there’s stuff stuck in it!’ I thought to myself before shrugging and following her to wherever she was going to bring me.

* * *

I grimaced in pain as I pulled the final fang from my arm, using just my index finger and thumb to pry the fang out.

She, the zebra, stated that her name was Zecora and that she was some sort of potion brewer, an alchemist I think she called herself. After a while of talking with her, I got this weird sense that she didn’t look like what zebras were supposed to look like. Her body figure, it looked too… smooth, almost non-animal like. Regardless of her looks, she didn’t have any pain killers, but she did have healing potions to aid in the healing process.

It was amazing, one moment I would yank a fang from my arm, then it would be gushing blood from the large nasty hole in my arm and then the next moment it would suddenly start to heal shut. ‘I kinda feel like Wolverine,’ I thought to myself as I continuously clenched and unclenched my fist, making sure my arm was working right.

I slumped back in the chair I was sitting in and sighed as my wounds all healed shut. It was cool because there was no scarring, not even faded skin. She was good at what she did and I wouldn’t say otherwise.

She broke the silence before I could, “You are a truly amazing specimen. To endure that much pain without passing out is truly extraordinary.” She remarked and I chuckled as I waved my hand in disagreement.

“Nah, I’ve heard of people getting shot and it didn’t even faze them… then again, they were hyped up to the gills on drugs…” I replied. She stepped closer towards me, observing me closer.

“What exactly are you? Where did you come from… and what is that… thing you used to destroy the Timberwolves?” She asked. I laughed from the multiple questions.

“Whoa! Which question do you want me to answer first?” I replied with a short laugh. She rubbed her chin then looked back to me.

“How strong are you?” She asked and I was taken back by the question. ‘How the hell do you answer that? How strong am I?’ I thought to myself.

“That wasn’t one of the original questions but okay…” I trailed off and tried to think of an answer then just shrugged. “Strong enough.” I replied but she shook her head.

“I need a definite answer.” She told me and I scratched my chin then shrugged again with a look of uncertainty.

“Strong enough to be strong enough.” I told her and she sighed with a somewhat disappointed tone.

She shook her head before speaking. “Are you a healthy specimen in your… species?” She asked and I scratched my head, then thought of all the stories about obesity and how it was a growing issue and how my generation was really unhealthy. I grabbed my stomach but couldn’t really grasp any sort of fat. I wasn’t slim, I was bulky, but most people would say that I’m 'Built like a brick shithouse.'

I nodded. “Yeah, really healthy.” I replied with another nod.

“EXCELLENT!” She boomed and I was sent hurtling back from some sort of green blast that seemed to just come out of nowhere. I crashed against the wall and grimaced to myself as random objects cluttered to the ground around me, some crashing against my back and shattering while others simply smashed against the ground.

“What the fuck…” I trailed off as I looked to the zebra, only to see that she wasn’t a zebra anymore. Now she was… some sort of black thing with lots of holes and a horn… and bug like wings. I was about to say something about Swiss cheese but she pounced at me.

I ducked into a roll and dodged her pounce then stood to my feet. “What the fuck are you?!” I roared as she spun and quarreled around me like a predator about to pounce. She jumped at me and as she did, I leapt into the air, delivering a powerful roundhouse kick to the side of her head, sending her crashing into a closet door that shattered upon impact, sending debris splintering around her.

I readied myself for another attack but noticed a zebra that looked exactly like the black thing had before it changed. The zebra was bound in rope and let out muffled screams as the black creature staggered to its feet… hooves, it had hooves.

As the creature charged me again I leapt to the left and out of its path. The beast crashed head on into the wall behind me, its horn lodging into the wood and keeping it stuck. It screamed and thrashed as it tried to break free, kicking more debris into the air.

I stood up, casually grabbed my SKS before walking over and mildly slamming the stock into the back of its head. Its body quickly went limp as the blow knocked it unconscious.

“This is one fucked up dream… Scotty is never going to believe this.” I laughed with a smile on my face. Now that the monster thing was knocked out, the muffled screams of the zebra could be heard and I looked over to it. I waved but its screams continued on so I rolled my eyes.

That’s when I kind of clued in. Zebras were supposed to be like horses, but this zebra looked like it would only stand at… maybe just above my waist level when it was on all fours. I scratched the back of my head in thought. 'Shouldn't it be taller?

I walked over and the zebra began to scream more frightfully. I placed a reassuring hand on its shoulder. “Sssh… it’s okay, I’m not gonna hurt you…” I whispered gently. The zebra calmed down slightly but as I slipped out the Bowie knife from my hip sheath, it began to scream again. The striped equine thrashed around and tried to break free of the ropes that held it down.

“Hey, calm down! How the fuck am I supposed to get you free if I don’t cut the damn ropes?” I asked aloud. Almost as if it understood me, the zebra stopped thrashing and just sat still. I quickly cut the ropes and released it.

It gasped then turned to me. “I am very grateful of your deed, much like a majestic steed.” She stated. I rolled my eyes.

“Please… no more fucking rhyming… I got enough of that from her,” I said as I pointed to the black thing which was still unconscious. I scratched my head in thought. “So… uhm, what the hell is going on here?” I asked, finally coming to my thoughts of what exactly was going on.

* * *

About an hour passed before I thunked my head against the table we were sitting at. This had to be some sort of really fucked up dream. I mean, talking zebras, mythical animals… it was just…

“So how do I get home?” I asked and the zebra, who stated that she was actually Zecora, simply shrugged. We heard a low groaning and both looked over to the now bound up Changeling queen. Zecora had put some sort of paste on her horn that was supposed to disable her magical abilities… ha, magical abilities, this place is really screwy.

The queen quickly realized the situation she was in and began to struggle but soon found it futile. “Release me or suffer the consequences!” She boomed and I just rolled my eyes with a faint smirk before turning back to Zecora.

Apparently Zecora had stumbled upon Chrysalis and ended up getting bested before being locked in her own closet. She was thankful for me getting her out and said she had been held captive for the last week while Chrysalis searched for prey, whatever that meant.

“HEY, ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME!?” Chrysalis screeched, interrupting my thoughts. Without even looking to her I gave my reply, which was nothing. “HEY! I’M TALKING TO YOU! RELEASE ME OR ELSE!” She continued to demand her release and I couldn’t hear Zecora over Chrysalis’s constant and futile demands. I stood up, pulled the sock off my right foot, walked over to her and then stuffed my sock in her mouth, effectively silencing her for the moment at hand.

She began to give muffled screams as she undoubtedly tasted the god awful flavor of sweat from my sock. “When you shut up, I’ll take the sock out.” I told her. She immediately stopped giving muffled screams. I waited a brief moment before pulling the sweaty sock from her mouth.

She looked at me with those pretty green eyes and blinked before quickly returning to her rant. “NOW I DEMAND YOU TO…” I stuffed the smelly sock back in her mouth then walked back to Zecora as Chrysalis’s muffled screams continued to fill the room with a rather annoying tone.

“So like I was saying… what’s her deal anyway?” I asked and Zecora sighed before replying.

“She is the empress of the Changeling hive and is a very feared creature. Most ponies would turn tail and run at the mere thought of a changeling.” She stopped for a moment and took a close look at me. “You are either very courageous… or very stupid.” She told me and I raised an eyebrow.

“I’d probably say the latter is the right answer… but why?” I asked and Zecora face palmed… or I guess she face hoofed, seeing as how she has hooves not… never mind.

“She is one of the most feared creatures in all Equestria, and you fought her without hesitation, then approached her and stuffed her mouth to keep her quiet.” She replied like it was some great act of heroism.

I shrugged, “It wasn’t that hard… her movements were kind of predictable.” I replied. Chrysalis either got tired or passed out from lack of oxygen. I looked back to see that she was indeed conscious but looking like she was in need of some fresh air. I chuckled silently and Zecora gave me a curious look. I pointed back to Chrysalis without even looking. “My socks probably taste like shit…”

I stood up and walked over to her. She tried to keep away from me but it was no good, the ropes held her down tight. “Hey… stay still for a second would you!” I ordered. She froze in fear from my deep voice as I pulled out my Bowie knife.

She began to yelp out muffled screams and I rolled my eyes. “Hey! Knock it off and keep still or else I won’t be able to cut you free.” At this statement she went quiet but Zecora gasped.

“You wouldn’t!” Zecora exclaimed but she got her answer when I pulled the sock out of Chrysalis’s mouth and cut the ropes that bound her body. Her wings ruffled then closed by her sides. She tilted her head to one side and both she and Zecora asked the same question at literally the same time, though Zecora asked in an irritated tone while Chrysalis asked in a more curious tone.

“Why did you do that?” They both asked and I shrugged.

“Why not?” I asked and Zecora answered first.

“Because she’s dangerous.” I chuckled from the comment and they both looked to me with unsure looks. I rolled my eyes and dangled my overly large knife around in the air.

“Duh… If she tries anything then I’ll just stab her to death,” I replied with a small laugh, but they both went pale. “What?!” I exclaimed.

“You’d… just kill her… without second thought?” They both asked at seemingly the same time. I nodded as if it wasn’t a big deal.

“Well duh… whatta yah expect me teh do? Use harsh language?” I asked rhetorically. The joke didn’t ease their tension and Chrysalis slowly took a cautious seat while Zecora followed suit.

I sat across from them and looked to my watch. It was later… earlier than I expected. 4:34am to be precise, or at least it was 4:34am back on my world, god only knows what it was here.

“So… why did you try to… do whatever it was you were trying to do?” I asked and Chrysalis answered my question with an answer she probably thought was easy to understand.

“My hive was scattered across Equestria and I do not have enough strength to gather them back together, so I need to feed off the love of somepony… or something,” she replied and I raised a confused eyebrow.

“Huh?” I asked and she repeated the exact same phrase. “Can you say that again… but in English?” I asked and she sighed.

“I feed off the essence of love.” She informed me. I scratched my head then gulped.

“So… uhm… forgive me if I’m wrong but… you swallow?” I asked and now it was her turn to raise an eyebrow.

“I do not understand.” She replied and I gulped as I repeated the question but with a more cautious tone.

“You… swallow… the essence of love…” I replied and readied myself for what I was sure to come. Instead however, she remained confused by my question. I gulped as I made the lewd gesture of sucking on a cock and swallowing.

Both her and Zecora gasped in disgust. “DO YOU THINK I’D REALLY DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT?!” Chrysalis boomed.

“Oh hell, I don’t know, you’re all like ‘I feed off the essence of love’ and to me that is either sexual or really, really, REALLY… I dunno, sexual,” I replied and she gasped.

“It’s neither of those things!” She snapped at me and I simply shrugged. She scowled as she tried to explain it to me in more detail. “If I can lure somepony or something into loving me, then I can feed off the essence of their love.” She told me.

I was about to say how gay that sounded, but then remembered that I was in a world of talking animals with magic and shit. I nodded, “Oh… I see… so you… trick ponies and stuff… by transforming then… swallow?” I asked comically and she went to yell at me but I stopped her by bringing my index finger to her mouth. “I’m just kidding… What if they love you naturally?” I asked and she raised an eyebrow.

“Who would love me naturally? I’m hideous.” She stated and I shrugged.

“Nah, you’re not that bad looking. Just different… like me.” I replied then scratched my chin. “You’re like… that puppy dog kind of cute, where it’s so cute and adorable that you just can’t…” I stopped as I thought about what I had just said. “I GOT IT!” I exclaimed and they both sat back from my sudden outburst.

“You need love…” I said as I pointed to Chrysalis, “And you all want her to not… take over the world, trying to feed off of everything… right?” I asked and they both gave a half-assed nod. “Well duh, we get you a puppy! They love everything that shows them attention,” I explained. The duo looked to each other, raised their adjacent eyebrows then looked back to me.

“That sounds crazy… but it might work,” Chrysalis replied. Zecora interrupted our joy with bad news.

“Maybe… but where would you find a puppy. The closest animal caretaker is near Ponyville and…” Zecora began but I cut her off.

“TO PONYVILLE!” I announced as I quickly grabbed my rifle. Zecora rested her right hoof on my shoulder.

“I do not think it would be wise for both of you to venture into that town.” She warned me and I tilted my head to one side and gave a look of confusion.

“They are a little… unsociable towards different and strange creatures that enter their town… and they will be very fearful of her,” she told me. I smiled.

“Ahhhh… a group of the KKK huh?” I asked and she tilted her head to one side. I chuckled, “Never mind… hey, why don’t you just tag along and tell them that we’re okay?” I asked and she sighed.

“I must apologize, but I cannot. My travels take me in the opposite direction, for I must now replace the things that she has destroyed.” Zecora said as she glared towards Chrysalis who blushed timidly.

“Whatever… to hell with it. We’re not black so it’s good.” I stated but as I looked over to Chrysalis I chuckled and I realized that what I said wasn't entirely true. "Well... she's black but I'm sure they'll make an exception." I grabbed Zecora and gave her a hug, stunning her from the sudden embrace.

“Thanks Z. Hey, you ever need my help, just call,” I said and she again was confused by the comment. “Never mind… just come find me and I’ll help you out if you ever need it,” I told her. She nodded and I looked to Chrysalis. “Alright… let’s follow the yellow brick road…” She gave me a confused look and I sighed as I placed my palm over my face. “Ugh… never mind.”

As the two of us left Zecora’s hut thingy, I looked to Chrysalis. She was really cute, in that puppy dog sort of sense. “Hey Chrysie…” I began and she looked to me, her cheeks turning into a cherry red shade.

“Chr… Chrysie?” She asked sheepishly and I nodded. “Nopony has ever called me Chrysie before…” She trailed off and I rolled my eyes before I continued on what I had previously been thinking.

“So… Equestria… do you all have like... a firearm magazine capacity law?” I asked and she gave me a very confused look. Before she could ask anything, I spoke my mind. “Those… Timber dog things, they were kind of viscous and I figured… you know, if there was no law against it, that I’d just… you know… remove my magazine plug…” I trailed off and she still had a confused look on her face.

I unslung my SKS and unsheathed my Bowie knife, using the tip of the blade to point to the rather large rivet that held a metal block inside the bottom of my magazine, effectively 'capping' my rifle to five shots. “Is there an ammunition capacity law?” I asked.

“Ammu… what?” She asked and I rolled my eyes.

“You know… gun laws?” I asked and she raised an eyebrow.

“Gun laws?” and I sighed.

“You know… guns?” I asked and she shook her head. ‘Figures, I get stuck with the broad that not only tried to kill me, but also doesn’t know anything about the gun laws in this place… didn’t she try to take over the world?’ I thought to myself as I began prying out the large rivet and metal block.

It was a little tricky but a little bit of effort and know how prevailed. In a few short moments I had the rifle magazine unplugged. I looked back to Chrysalis and opened my saddle pouch before pulling out several shells of 7.62x39mm ballistic rounds. “Observe,” I told her before loading the gun.

“I do not understand,” she told me and I sighed.

“The… never mind… these things are what…” I trailed off and figured she probably wouldn’t understand anyway.

“Those what?” She asked and I rolled my eyes.

“To make it real easy, the tip on those things I just put in my rifle, go really fast and kill whatever I’m shooting at,” I told her and she gasped.

“You’d… kill?” She whispered and I sighed. ‘I thought we already went over this?’ I thought silently.

“Uhh… yeah… but only the bad guys,” I told her and she gulped before stopping.

“Then perhaps we should not travel together…” She trailed off and I looked back to her with a shrug.

“Why not? I know you used to be bad… and tried to take over the world… and tried to kill me recently… but it’s cool, I’m sure… meh, never mind, let’s just get you a puppy.” I said, figuring that if she did try to kill me again, I could just put one through her skull… ‘But she’s sooo cute…’ My mind thought.

I silently groaned as I began having second thoughts about the plausibility of shooting her if I had to. It would be like putting down a really cute puppy or something. I turned and looked to her with a smile and she caught my glance.

“What?!” She gasped, obviously afraid that I might be thinking of something dastardly, like killing her... or worse.

“You’re very pretty.” I stated timidly and she blushed slightly.

“You… do you mean that?” She asked and I nodded with a hint of confusion.

“Well uhh… yeah, I mean… you’re cute… like a puppy or something.” I told her and she smiled brightly as we continued on.

“Thank you…” She whispered and I looked to her with a raised eyebrow. “Nopony has ever thought I was cute… it’s why I have to change my appearance.” She informed me.

As we continued on through the forest, she told me about when she had tried to take over the world, and how she had been defeated in a kind of retarded way. I mean, love deflected her away, seriously? I thought she fed off love?

I stopped suddenly and gasped. She followed my gaze but couldn’t figure out what I was looking at. “What?” She asked and I pointed to what I was looking at.

“We… are…” I began. Chrysalis looked as well but she ended up just tilting her head in confusion of what it could possibly be.

Author's Note

And just incase you were wondering about how the character got in Equestria, I'll explain that later (It's a plot development thing)

Chapter 2

“This has got to be a dream… right?”

I clung to the front left quarter panel of the 1997 cherry red F250HD. “Oooh… my baby… I love you sooo much…” I whispered as I gently rubbed the driver side door. I looked back to Chrysalis who had a seriously confused look on her face.

“Forgive me if I’m curious but… is that what the other gender of your species looks like?” She asked in a serious tone. I looked to the truck, then back to Chrysalis before bursting into laughter.

“No… ah-ha-ha... no… but…” I continued to laugh until I somewhat stifled my laughter and managed to speak. “No… this… this is ‘my’ baby,” I told her through stifled laughs. She approached the vehicle before resting a hoof on the driver side door.

“This is your child?” She asked and I chuckled slightly before a sigh of humor escaped my lips.

“Not in the way you’re thinking. This is Cadance and she’s…” I began before being cut off by a horrified gasp that left Chrysalis’s mouth. “What?” I asked curiously and she grabbed the collar of my coat.

“That is not Cadance… Cadance is an awful being, the one who was solely responsible for my demise! How could you name something after such an awful pony?!” Chrysalis boomed. I raised an eyebrow with a look of stupidity in my facial expression. She face hoofed before shaking me. “WEREN’T YOU LISTENING?!” She boomed and I shook my head.

“Nah… I stopped paying attention when you started going on about love being super powerful… kind of gay if you ask me,” I said before gently rubbing my hand back and forth along the quarter panel of my truck.

She gave an annoyed ‘Humph!’ before scolding me. “Well you seem to be very affectionate to this… thing!” She scowled and I chuckled.

“Well yeah… I mean, she’s my truck and she’s…” I started but was soon cut off.

“You say love is stupid yet you love this truck,” she cut me off and I again sighed before shaking my head in disappointment.

“It’s not the same love you talk about… but either way, what’s not to love?!” I stated and she looked to me with a dumbfounded look. I slapped my hand against my face and groaned before pointing to the truck.

“For starters… it’s a diesel truck, real trucks don’t have sparkplugs…” but once again she cut me off.

“What are sparkplugs?” She asked and I rolled my eyes.

“Never mind, it’s got a crew cab with…” as I pointed to the cab, but once again she cut me off.

“Crew cab?” She asked and I face palmed as I let out a sigh.

“Just… pretend you know what I’m talking about… crew cab with an eight foot extended box, four wheel drive with manual locking hubs…” but once again she cut me off.

“I’m sorry, I really am, but… I just don’t understand what that means…” she said in an apologetic tone. I let out a muffled groan before stepping over to her and rubbing her head like I was petting a dog. She gasped from the sudden contact and just stood there, shocked that I’d actually touch her in a non-violent way.

“Just… I’ll explain it later… just listen to my rant,” I said with a wink. She nodded and I began again. “Crew cab, eight foot box, four wheel drive with locking hubs, nine thousand pound legal tow hitch capacity, over twelve thousand with a fifth wheel…” At the final statement she interrupted me.

“That… thing, err the… truck… can pull that much? Does it use magic to do so?” She asked and I smiled. Finally she understood something I said.

I shook my head. “Nah, it’s all horsepower… chrome grill bars with two fog lamps and a winch, chrome headache rack with six high beam lights, chrome pipe sidesteps…” I continued as I pointed to each individual part. “Two side mounted toolboxes with my… tools, in the back… it’s… it’s…” I stammered as I took a breath.

She rested a hoof on my shoulder. “Can we call it something other than Cadance?” She asked and I nodded.

“Yeah, Cadance is her full name but usually I address her as Cade, that’s short for Cadance and long for… Kaa…” I said with a smirk.

“Cade… that’s nicer than the name Cadance,” she told me. I was about to ask why, but then quickly remembered her… defeat. Whatever the hell she wanted to call it, it sounded kind of gay, regardless of how she put it.

I opened the driver side door and the door light shown down to light my way. “Hop in,” I told Chrysalis who simply stood there with a look of confusion on her face. Right… she wouldn't know a thing about my stuff. “Just walk over to the other side…” I told her with a sigh. She did as I asked while I leaned across to the passenger side and reached for the door but couldn’t reach it.

“Fuck… this truck is too big sometimes…” I muttered as I squeezed myself further until I finally reached the door handle and popped the door open. As it swung open, I motioned for Chrysie to hop in.

She just stood outside with an unsure look on her face. “What? I’m not going to rape you,” I laughed. To this comment she blushed. I reached over and extended my hand, offering her my help to get into the vehicle. “Just step on that chrome pipe thing and it should be able to help you in,” I told her.

She did as I asked and finally managed to get in but squirmed in the seat as she tried to arrange herself in a comfortable way. I leaned across her body and she gasped from my sudden movement. “What are you doing?” She gasped in a whispered tone that made me laugh.

“Preparing to rape you! Never get in a stranger's vehicle!” I laughed in a sarcastic tone before slamming the passenger door shut. I leaned back into my seat and looked over, only to see she had a frightened look on her face. “What?" I asked then thought back on my rather crude joke. "Oh… sorry, I was just kidding… I guess it was a really bad joke huh?” I asked and she let out a relieved sigh.

I scrunched my nose as I set my SKS rifle across the back bench seat. “Let me ask you something…” I began and she nodded. “If you’re a feared creature in Equestria… then why do you fear me?” I asked and she gulped.

“Because you’re scary…” She stammered timidly and I rolled my eyes.

“Really? I’m not even scary. What’s so scary about me that a feared queen, like yourself, would be scared of?” I asked and she managed to speak.

“It is most likely your ability to kill without hesitation,” she stated and I rolled my eyes.

“How do you know I’m not just saying that? Maybe I’m actually really gentle and wouldn’t hurt a fly,” I countered, but she replied back easier than I thought she would.

“I watched you defeat those Timberwolves earlier,” she replied and I sighed. I reached up to the sun visor and pulled it down. A set of keys flopped down which I snatched right out of the air, almost as if it was a natural instinct.

“Oh Cadance, you naughty, naughty girl…” I whispered as I began to caress the steering wheel. Chrysalis looked over to me with a shocked look. I laughed quietly to myself. “You have to talk naughty to Cadan… Cade, to get her turned on,” I told Chrysalis, who raised an eyebrow. I sighed, “Okay… you got me. It’s just something I do to entertain myself… but you do have to unlock the ignition lock,” I said as I waved a little tab that was attached to the set of keys.

She watched as I waved it through the cubby hole just to the left of the 12V power plug hook-up. The cubby hole emitted a beep and I looked to Chrysalis with a smirk. “The naughty key…” I said with a laugh before slipping the keys into the ignition and turning them. I stopped just before running the starter.

A little red message appeared on the dashboard just beside the steering column that read ‘Wait to start’. Another second passed and the light flicked off. I turned the key and the truck turned over briefly before rumbling to life.

The 7.3L turbo engine hummed its low pitched tune. I reached over to the left instrument panel and pulled back a little tab to its full extension. The lights and low beam fog lamps lit up, but didn’t do much to brighten the dark forest in front of us.

“And Burdy said, let there be light!” I announced before tapping the windshield washer stick forwards. A little blue light lit up on the dashboard, informing me that the high beams where on. I didn’t need it to tell me. Both the headache rack lights and the grill bar lights flared up and illuminated the entire forest that was directly in front of the truck, even giving light to the rear of the truck.

“Oh wait… just wait… this’ll be perfect…” I said before hopping out of the truck and running around to the rear side. As I rummaged through the rear of the truck I muttered to myself small curse words. “Where the fuck is it… how the fuck can’t I find something that fucking big… oh there it is.” I reached for the white object that had an almost ivory look to it.

I pulled out a set of Texas Longhorn bull horns that had been polished and then mounted to a hood magnet. Rather than drill holes in my hood, I figured, ‘Why not get a really good magnet that could mount stuff to my hood when I felt like compensating for stuff?’ Seemed logical to me.

I hurried around to the front of my truck and latched the horns to the hood, tips pointing outwards. “Oh… we are so set now…” I said before jumping back into the truck. Chrysalis looked over to me with a wondering look.

“I don’t have a small dick, they’re just jealous that my truck is better than their Civic…” She gave me a confused look as her reply. “Never mind, which way to Ponyville?” I asked and she pointed to our right.

“To Ponyville!” I said aloud before slipping the automatic transmission stick into drive. I reached to the radio and pressed power. A little readout screen read a bunch of things before scanning the disc currently inside the CD player.

‘No one knows what it’s like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes…’

Chrysalis looked to the CD player and listened to the tunes. Moments later she looked to me. “Are you playing this because of… me?” She asked and I looked to her with a raised eyebrow.

“Uhm no… but it’s a good song huh?” I asked. ‘The Who, Behind Blue Eyes’ was a good song to listen to, but I guess if you compare the song lyrics to what Chrysalis had been through, you could say it resembled her life story.

‘No one knows what it’s like
To be hated
To be fated
To telling only lies…’

Not even five minutes into driving, Chrysalis was squirming again, trying to find a comfortable way to sit. “Here…” I said as I lifted the middle console, revealing the truck’s sixth seat.

She smiled as she curled up on both the passenger side seat, and the middle seat. “Thank you…” She thanked me with a genuine tone and my heart seemed to flutter as she rested her head on my lap.

She was just like an adorable puppy. I remembered back when I was young with my dog, Ally…

* * *

Earth,

Years ago…

I sat on the porch and whistled loudly. I heard panting as a brown mix breed dog came racing around the corner of the house, leaping the entire flight of stairs in just one jump. Her tail wagged furiously as she jumped, her front paws on my lap, slobber drooling down onto my cargo pants and staining them.

“Oooh… who loves you?” I asked in a cuddly voice as I leaned my face forwards. My dog, Ally, began slurping at my face, drool covering the majority of my face before I pulled back and wiped it away.

Her panting was quick and excited. “Does somebody want to go for a walk?” I asked and, to answer that question, her whole front end began to move in opposite motion with her rear, her tail wagging being so powerful that it nearly affected her whole body.

“Yeah! Let’s go for a walk!” I said happily. She sloshed her face forwards and began slurping wet dog kisses across my face before rushing off the porch and down to the ground. She looked back to me, her tail still wagging. “Yeah, yeah, give me a second…” I stated as I stood up and stretched.

To this action she went absolutely berserk and ran around in circles. “Alright… alright, I’m coming, I’m coming…” I laughed. No sooner had I set foot on the ground, she raced off, sniffing the ground for anything exciting to dig up.

* * *

Equestria,

Present time…

I wiped a tear away from my eyes as I remembered those days. They seemed like just yesterday.

I felt a wetness on my groin and looked down, only to see that Chrysalis had passed out and was drooling on my lap. “Figures…” I muttered to myself. I flicked off the radio and looked to my watch. It read that it was 6:39am so I guess I had kind of lost track of time. That and we were in an open field with a few apple trees here and there.

I went to wake Chrysalis up and ask her which way to go, but couldn’t bring myself to do so, she was just too damn adorable like this. I chuckled as I thought about how she resembled a block of Swiss cheese that was molded into some sort of four legged animal.

I shut Cadance off and slowly slipped out of my truck, making sure not to wake her. Musing to myself as I walked to the back of the truck, I realized that none of the stars in the sky even closely resembled the ones back home. They looked really... fake, almost as if from some story book or something.

I reached into the back of my truck and pulled out a can of Hoppe's 9 gun cleaner. 'Corrosively primed shells equals: gun must be cleaned' I chuckled to myself as I quickly disassembled the rifle on my tailgate. The Russians sure knew how to make a gun, that was for sure. I needed no extra tools to clean or disassemble the rifle, everything came with it.

I took out a few cleaning patches from a baggy and quickly made do of cleaning the gun, everything from the receiver to the trigger assembly. I dried of the gun with some paper towels and within a minute, I had the gun assembled back together. I nodded to myself as the clean barrel gleamed in the night sky.

I put away all my cleaning supplies then made my way back to the driver side door. I sighed quietly as I squirmed into the back bench seat, setting my rifle across the floor before slipping off both my boots and socks, letting my feet get some fresh air for the first time in at least twenty four hours. Though it was kind of cramped in the back, I managed to scrunch up in a fetal and quickly fall asleep. ‘I’ll probably wake up in my truck back at the farm… Scotty will never believe this dream…’ I thought before my mind became blank.

* * *

I felt a nudging at my leg that immediately awoke me. I sat up though my vision was a bit blurred from the seemingly blinding sun-rays that pierced through the windows. I groaned as I wiped the eye boogers away. “Scotty… you’re never going to believe the fucked up dream I just had…” I began but was cut off by a familiar voice.

“Who’s Scotty?” The voice asked. I groaned as I slowly took my hands away from my face. Though she wasn’t necessarily a terrible sight, seeing her meant that I must still be stuck in my dream.

“I thought I had finally woken up…” I muttered before trying to stretch. I soon felt a tingly feeling in my groin. “Ugh… give me a second!” I gasped before quickly squirming my way out of the back seat, past the changeling queen and to the rear of my truck.

Morning residue was still on the ground and dampened my bare feet, but I could care less. I fumbled with my belt buckle before slightly slipping down my pants and boxers then finally getting the relief my body so badly needed.

I let out a deep and relieved breath as I stood there, the sound of urine splashing against the ground echoed in the fresh morning air. “What are you doing?” Chrysalis asked, but before I could answer, she realized. “UGH! Couldn’t you have chosen a better place to do that?!” She made it sound like what I was doing was some indecent act.

I looked around with a smirk then chuckled. “Well… it was either here or… over there, in the wide open fields…” I stated while pointing to the pasture. Chrysalis sighed as she face hoofed. ‘God, what was the big deal, so I was taking a leak… maybe I should’ve pissed last night, err earlier this morning, before I passed out…’ I thought.

Finally relieved, I gave my buddy a shake then slipped him back into my boxers and pulled them up along with my pants before buckling my belt. I opened the tailgate and sat down while I let out a long yawn and stretched, cracking my back in several spots. The stretch seemed to relieve tension in my back muscles.

I tried to think about what to do but found myself in a state of tiredness. I looked to my watch only to see that it was 8:29am. So I hadn’t had that much sleep, but it would have to suffice for now.

As I let out another yawn, tears came to my eyes and I wiped them away. “Are you crying?” Chrysalis asked and I shook my head.

“No…” I said through a yawn. “When I yawn tears tend to come to my eyes,” I informed her before rubbing my eyes with the palms of my hands. “This has to be a dream…” I muttered and Chrysalis gave a gentle laugh.

“Why does it ‘have’ to be a dream?” She asked and I gave her a ‘You damn well know why’ look.

“Because it has to be a dream,” I said bluntly and she laughed lightly before sitting beside me. I rolled my eyes as my stomach grumbled. Come to think of it, I hadn’t eaten in over twenty four hours, having missed breakfast the day before. As I yawned, I managed to ask her something very important.

“Where’s the closest restaurant?” And she scratched her chin. As she continued to think about the question, I realized that because of her ‘feared’ nature, she probably didn’t get out and socialize much. “Is there food in Pony town?” I asked and she gave a shrug. ‘Close enough…’ I thought before hopping down from the tailgate.

I gave one final yawn and stretched before slamming the tailgate shut and proceeding to the driver side door, Chrysalis moving her way to the passenger side at the same time. I slipped into the driver seat and looked over, only to see that Chrysalis was having trouble getting the door open. “Press the button near the hand…” I began, only to remember that she didn’t have fingers, or the use of her magic.

I shuffled over so that I could reach the door handle and popped open the door before extending my hand for her to take. She rested a hoof on my hand and I grasped it gently, guiding her into the passenger seat.

“Can I borrow something to dry off my horn?” She asked. I slipped off my jacket and used the sleeves to wipe the paste off her horn. Moments later her horn glowed and she blasted some green beam out towards the ground that scorched the grass where it struck.

“Hot damn. Remind me never to get on your bad side.” I muttered and she looked to me with a slight grin. “Hey don’t get any funny ideas either…” I said as I shook my finger at her.

She laughed as the passenger door glowed with a green aura then slammed shut. “I wouldn’t think of it,” she told me in a cute tone. I reached for my keys but they floated up in front of my face, covered in the same green aura that had recently enticed the passenger door.

“May I?” She asked and I shrugged. She blushed slightly before giving a timid giggle. “Uhm… Cade you… naughty girl…” She continued to giggle as she tried to talk naughty to my truck.

I laughed. “You don’t actually have to literally talk naughty to my truck… just swipe the tab in the cubby hole.” I informed her. To this information her cheeks turned a bright cherry red shade, having realized she made a fool of herself.

Without another word, she quickly levitated the keys into the cubby hole, emitting a beep. The keys then dangled through the air and towards the ignition. She tried a few times before having to crawl over atop my lap, looking closely while she figured out how to insert the keys into the ignition.

She began to turn the keys but I gasped. “Wait, no, no!” and she stopped abruptly. I pointed to the red readout on the panel that read ‘Wait to start’. “It’s glow plugs, you have to wait for them to…” I began but realized she’d have no idea what I was talking about. “Just wait for that message to go away.”

Another few moments passed and the message disappeared. She twisted the key and the truck chugged to life, emitting its low iconic rumble. She leaned back into the passenger side and smiled.

I chuckled slightly. “I guess you can turn some things on,” I said and, to the rather sexual comment, she blushed lightly. I reached down to the driver door master controls and rolled down both windows with the electric buttons.

The windows hummed as they slid down and Chrysalis watched with extreme fascination. ‘God it’s like she’s never seen a roll down window before…’ I thought to myself.

“How did you do that? Do you have magic to?!” She gasped and I shook my head before pointing to the buttons.

“You have them too, except only for your window. Press the button with the up arrow for the window to go up, or the down arrow for the window to go down.” I informed her. She looked to the buttons then pressed her hoof atop the up arrow.

Though her hoof was a little large to be pressing buttons, she did manage to work the window. “Which way to Pony town?” I asked.

Without looking, she pointed towards a small town in the distance. “Over there, and it’s Ponyville, not Pony town…” She told me whilst continuing to fiddle with the electric windows. I rolled my eyes with a smile, ‘An empress of an empire… entertained by electric windows…’ I thought. I reached into the back seat, grabbed both my socks and my boots, then slipped them on. Just before slipping the truck into drive, I put my jacket back on and wiped away the gooey stuff, flicking it out the window to avoid staining my truck’s interior.

The truck’s tires rolled through the rather thick grass before finally finding a dirt path that looked like it led right to the town. Without any notifications I didn’t know what the speed limit was here. “What’s the speed limit?” I asked and she looked over to me.

“The what?” She asked and I realized that was probably another thing they didn’t have.

“Uhm… I mean… how fast are we allowed to go?” I rephrased my sentence and she shrugged.

“I suppose as fast as you want but… don’t do anything that’s dangerous,” she stated. ‘As fast as I want?! Oooh it sounds like the Audubon…’ I thought before slowly pressing the accelerator pedal downwards.

The truck slowly picked up speed before reaching a smoother road surface. ‘50… 60… 70… 80…’ I thought to myself as I read the speedometer. Finally reaching 80 km/h, I realized that perhaps I shouldn’t go that fast when entering a town with possible pedestrians.

However, as the truck slowed to a mere 60 km/h and entered the town, it looked as if the town was deserted. No one was to be seen. The streets were empty, the doors to every home were closed, hell, some places even had the windows shut tight with boards over them.

I stopped the truck in the middle of town and switched off the ignition but left the battery on for one specific reason. “So uhm… where is everyone?” I asked and Chrysalis shrugged. She went to open the passenger door but I stopped her.

“Nah, nah, nah… I gotta make this a cool entrance…” I told her and she gave me a confused look. “Trust me…” I said in an Arnie voice before reaching for the back window rack. I couldn’t reach what I was after and sighed in irritation before tilting my seat back and grabbing the desired object.

I leaned the seat upright and Chrysalis looked to me with a curious look. “What is that?” She asked and I smiled before fiddling with the radio until I got the song I wanted. I racked the slide on the Norinco 870 short barrel 12 gauge, loading a fresh 3" magnum shell into the chamber.

The tunes ‘Bad to the Bone, by George Thorogood’ began to play on the radio. I cranked the music to the maximum before reaching for my black sunglasses while at the same time trying to keep a straight face.

I gave the right arm of the sunglasses a flick and both arms extended. I slipped the glasses on my face before slowly stepping out of the truck and looking around with a Terminator facial expression. The sling of the shotgun dangled about, while my boots tufted up some dust that was blown away with the slight breeze.

I couldn’t handle it and chuckled slightly, a smug grin slipping across my lips. However fucked up this dream may be, I was going to have fun doing it. I let the shotgun dangle in my right hand, its twelve inch barrel barely giving it enough length to pass my knees.

Another few moments passed by and I rolled my eyes. I guess I was kind of hoping for some bar owner to come out with a lever action shotgun. I stepped back towards the truck and fully turned off the truck, the radio quickly silencing afterwards.

“Well… I think this place is abandoned…” I stated as Chrysalis stepped out from the passenger side. I walked forwards a couple of steps, my Terra work boots kicking up more dust. I stopped and called out to anyone who might be able to hear me. “HELLO! ANYONE HOME! WE’RE NOT HERE TO HURT YOU!” I yelled out. Silence answered me and I looked to Chrysalis with a small smile.

“Well… wanna loot some abandoned houses?” I asked and she gasped from my question.

“We can’t steal!” She gasped, almost like it was the worst possible thing ever. ‘Jeeze… she’s tried to take over the world yet she won’t steal from abandoned houses…’ I thought before sighing.

“Okay… but I’m hungry,” I stated before looking around for a diner. Maybe I wouldn’t steal, but rather take some food and leave money, that way it wouldn’t technically be stealing. As I continued to look around, I heard a faint whistling that sounded almost like a bomb falling from the sky.

“Huh… kind of sounds like a supercharger or something…” I muttered as I looked to the sky. I spotted something grey flying down towards the ground and squinted my eyes to get a better look.

“What the hell is that?” I whispered as it continued to get closer. I scratched the top of my head and continued to watch but in sheer moments I realized something awful, it wasn’t going to stop.

My spine tingled and sent out a terrible feeling throughout my body. I went to leap out of the way but stopped at the last moment as I heard a cry for help. I looked up to see that the cry was coming from the grey figure in the sky. I quickly raced through the possible options of what I could do to help, but in the end just stood there like an idiot.

Seconds later the figure slammed into me, crashing both our bodies into the ground and making a slight crater, dust fuming into the air and covering our bodies from sight. My shotgun cluttered across the ground, landing nearby but just out of my reach. I groaned as bright white blurs stained my vision, pain searing through my body and emitting pained groans from my mouth.

I heard a paced and fearful panting coming from whatever had just hit me. I felt the figure that was currently resting on top of my body. It had soft fur and… wings?! I opened my right eye only to see a gray pegasus splayed across my chest, wearing some sort of grey uniform, with holes cut in the back of its shirt to allow movement of its wings.

It still had its hooves over its eyes but slowly took them away, revealing a set of criss-crossed, light yellow eyes. We just laid like that for a moment before I winced and tried to sit up.

“Are you okay? I just don’t know what went wrong,” she stated in a funny voice. I nodded with another wince of pain. How I had survived that crash I didn’t want to know, but I had survived nonetheless. “Are you sure you’re okay, you look…” She trailed off and gasped in fear as she noticed the tall black figure behind me. “RUN!” She screamed.

I turned to see Chrysalis standing behind me, then turned back to the pegasus, only to see her struggling to get off me. Her tail had become entwined around my leg, keeping her from escaping.

“HELP! IT’S GOT ME!” She screamed. I gently grabbed hold her midsection and pulled her back towards me, before trying to loosen her tail from around my leg. “HELP! SOMEPONY HELP ME!” She screamed as she continued to thrash about, her wings constantly slapping my face and making it hard to loosen the tail still wrapped around my leg.

“Would yah… stop moving around… so much… hey knock it off already, I’m trying to get you free.” I managed as I continued to try and get her tail free.

“Hurry! RUN, IT’S HERE!” She continued to scream. A strong wingbeat slapped my face and I lost my grip around her tail. She flew forwards, almost like a hummingbird, her wings emitting a high pitched hum, before quickly losing most of her energy and collapsing on the ground, panting for air.

I took one step forwards, allowing the tension on her tail to loosen. She rolled over to her back and saw my body lumbering above her. She tried painfully to shuffle backwards, but I grabbed her and held her above the ground. “Just… calm down. I’m not going to hurt you. I’m here to… rescue you,” I said as I looked back to Chrysalis and motioned for her to get in the truck.

As Chrysalis hopped back in the truck I looked back to the pegasus who had a shocked look on her face, which looked kind of funny because of her eyes. I quickly undid her tail from around my leg, then set her down and stepped back.

“Please just… don’t be scared…” I said in a very gentle voice. “I know that Chrys… the changeling, is very scary, but she’s just here to buy a puppy,” I stated. The pegasus just sat there, wide eyed, obviously petrified by the recent experience.

I reached my hand down. “Let’s start over, my name is Evan, but you can call me Burdy,” I told her. She brought a shaky hoof up and accepted my offer. I helped her to all fours and she fluffed her wings before gulping.

“I’m… Derpy,” she stated rather sheepishly. I nodded as I gave a gentle shake of my hand.

“It’s very nice to meet you Derpy,” I stated before taking my hand away and resting it back at my side. The door to my truck opened and Chrysalis stepped out. Derpy was about to scream but I brought my hand to her mouth.

“She’s not here to hurt anyone. She is only here to get a puppy, so please… don’t scream,” I said. Derpy gulped as Chrysalis slowly approached. I looked to Chrysalis. “Chrysalis… this is Derpy.” I introduced the black empress to the cross eyed pegasus.

She extended her hoof that was covered in holes. 'I wonder how all those holes got there anyway,' I thought as I watched the duo. Derpy had an extremely petrified look on her face as she brought her hoof up and shook Chrysalis’s.

“DERPY RUN!” Screamed a voice just as my senses flared out of control, sending tingly feelings throughout my entire body and making everything seem to go in slow motion.

I turned to see a streak of rainbow flying directly at us, at deadly speeds. I tackled the duo to the ground just in time. The rainbow streak flew directly above us and crashed into the wall of a building, shattering it to pieces and revealing several horses… ponies.

They were like ponies, but a tad bit shorter. Probably standing at about waist level and having very strange, colored fur. They all began to scream as they raced around in a frantic way, scurrying about like the end of the world was upon them.

Derpy, Chrysalis, and I stood up and just watched as the whole town seemed to become livelier. “Guess it wasn’t abandoned… well, let’s get something to eat,” I said, but the two gave me a look that seemed like they were thinking I was stupid.

“FREEZE!” Boomed a voice and I looked over to see several ponies dressed in medieval armour, brandishing spears and such. No pony listened, but I quickly clued in that they were perhaps talking to us.

“Hey, do you guys know where I can buy a puppy?” I asked as I approached them. Suddenly that rainbow colored streak struck me, tackling me to the ground.

“Don’t move, or else!” Threatened the cyan blue pegasus. She had a rainbow colored mane that drooped down past her face and dangled just inches from my face. I slipped my left arm between us and tossed her aside with ease. At first I thought she would have some weight to her body, so I put in a lot of force to my thrust, but I was surprised to find that she probably wouldn’t weigh more than maybe one hundred pounds, so her body was sent tumbling about.

I stood up just as more medieval looking ponies arrived, followed by a carriage pulled by more pegasi. Jeeze, things were getting out of hand quickly... and we just wanted a fricken puppy. I scrambled across the ground and grabbed the shotgun before raising its barrel into the air and firing it.

Everything became still as the ponies all froze from the weapon’s discharge, which was close to a crack of thunder. The shot echoed in the distance and they all looked to me as I racked the slide, expelling a still smoking red cartridge onto the ground.

“Now that I’ve got your attention… where can I buy a puppy? My friend here wants one,” I said as I pointed to Chrysalis.

“Wait… what?!” The rainbow colored pegasus asked with a dumbfounded look.

“My friend wants a puppy… and I want to go home,” I said. Everything seemed to be still as they processed what they had just heard. “Well?” I asked curiously. Several ponies scratched their heads, almost like they thought they couldn’t believe what they were hearing.

“You’re… friends with her?” Asked one of the guards. I nodded as I slung the shotgun across my back.

“Eeyah… now about that puppy…” I asked. A soft gasp could be heard before a pale yellow pegasus hummed forwards, her long pink mane and tail dangling about freely. She landed sheepishly in front of us, shaking terribly as she stepped forwards.

“Uhm… I can… help you… I mean… if you… don’t mind and… Eep, please don’t hurt me!” She gasped before cowering before my feet. I looked around with shock and confusion. She was obviously really petrified of Chrysalis… or me… I’d guess Chrysalis, but it could be either one of us... or maybe both.

I cautiously leaned down and tapped her on the shoulder. “Uhm… I’m not here to hurt anyone… any… pony… I’m just here to get my friend a puppy, can you help me… please?” I asked in a semi afraid voice, trying to give her comfort by acting like I too was afraid.

Her legs trembled as she stood up and nodded.

* * *

An hour passed and the ‘Royal guards’ had finally backed off. Some white unicorn with wings stated she could handle us if anything went wrong. At first I was relieved. I figured that I wouldn’t have a bunch of stallions with spears poking me in the ass. But now I had this white unicorn thing looming over me like some sort of death cloud.

Now several of us sat at some tree cottage thing while the yellow pegasus, who stated that her name was: Flutter, Flutter, Flutter, was singing a song with Chrysalis while they hopped around like some god awful Disney movie sing-a-long scene.

“So Flutter Flutter Flutter…” I began but the purple unicorn with wings beside me gave me a weird look.

“Flutter Flutter Flutter?” She asked and I nodded.

“Well that’s her name right? I mean that’s what she said when I introduced myself,” I replied. She face hoofed.

“No… she’s shy. Her name is Fluttershy, but she was probably so scared of you that she couldn’t pronounce her own name,” she informed me. Suddenly I heard a squeal of delight and looked over to see Chrysalis holding a cute Golden Retriever puppy.

“I LOVE YOU!” Chrysalis announced as she held the puppy close to her face and snuggled it. The puppy licked her face, elisping another squeal of happiness from Chrysalis. I let out a sigh as I stretched.

“Now… can I please go home?” I asked and they all looked to me. I had a feeling that this wouldn’t end well.

* * *

So sure enough, it didn’t end well. I later found out, on our way to some empire of crystals, that I wasn’t dreaming. In fact, I was in some place called Equestria; where ponies lived in harmony and it was ruled by the princesses, which were called alicorns, and that it sounded like something out of a really cheesy Disney movie.

But luckily, they knew of a way to get me back to my world. There was some sort of magic portal mirror thingy that could transport me back to my world. I was saved. The only problem was that it was too small to fit my truck through, but I figured for now, I’d just find a way to get back home, and then find a way to get my truck home.

Chrysalis had flown off with her puppy after a rather sad farewell. That left me, the six ‘harmony’ bearers, and three alicorns along with a stallion who stated his name was: Shining Armor. Six harmony ponies, Lord Death, Blue Lord Death, Pink Lord Death and Shining Armor... great.

“So…” I began as I looked to the mirror. “How will we get my truck through that?” I asked. They all looked around as they tried to think of a plausible answer. I rolled my eyes. “Never mind, I’ll just come back with a mechanic crew and disassemble it later,” I said, but the dark blue alicorn, Luna I think her name was... Blue Lord Death I called her, interrupted my suggestion.

“It would not be wise to do so. Brining several of your kind here may disrupt the balance between our worlds and crash the portal." I groaned from the information and sighed.

“Fine… then I’ll bring back some tools and disassemble it myself, then voila, we’re in business,” I told them.

“Ah thought yah said that the toolbox on yer… truck did yah call it? Had tools in it.” Stated the orange southern pony. I gave a semi-nod before opening one of the toolboxes, revealing several cases.

“They are… my tools… ahem, tools,” I said.

“So why not disassemble it now?” She asked. I grabbed the case labelled ‘Applebloom’ and walked towards the driver side door and grabbed my SKS from the backseat before fitting it into the case.

“Because these tools aren’t used for fixing…” I said scientifically as I set the case in the toolbox and locked it shut. “But regardless…” I began as I put on a straight face. “Ah’ll be back,” I said as I walked up to the mirror.

I kind of half expected this to be some bad joke, but as I placed my hand on the mirror, I went right through. It was like it was an actual portal.

I stepped through and my mind became hazy as it seemed like my body was stretched into spaghetti. I yelped as my body flew through some hippy looking bright tunnel of light.

The next thing I knew, I was looking at a clear sky. I sat up and looked around. It didn’t look like I was at that Crystal palace place anymore. It looked like I was at some sort of high school.

I let out a small relieved exhale as I brought my hands to my face and rubbed my cheeks but gasped as it didn’t feel right. It felt way too soft and mushy. I looked to my hands and screamed as I realized my hand looked… animated.

There were no joint lines on my fingers. My fingers themselves looked to be about the width of a friggin pencil and my body…

I screamed again as I realized that my body looked terribly off. I no longer had my hulking frame, instead I looked like some thin model or something. My hair it was… soft and silky, not short and rough like it used to be. My skin was… green.

I grasped my right bicep, only to realize that it had shrunk considerably. It was now probably the size of what my wrist used to be. “WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT!?” I screamed as loud as I could. My voice echoed the profanity throughout the entire property. A person walking by looked to me with a shocked look from my sudden outburst.

I looked to him only to realize he didn’t look at all human. Instead he looked, well, kind of human, but his skin tone… it was purple! And his arms and legs were even thinner than mine.

I scrambled backwards but my mind went blank as my body fell through the portal. I, once again, went into that hippy portal thing and my body was stretched out like spaghetti.

I awoke back in Equestria with the group all looking to me with shocked faces. I quickly brought up my hand and let out a relieved sigh. “I never thought I’d be so happy to be back here,” I said and they all gave me a confused look.

“That was fast,” Rainbow Dash stated and I nodded.

“Whatever the fuck that was… it wasn’t my home… my body was the size of a fucking TWIG, A TWIG! Look at me, I’m not a fucking twig!” I gasped and Celestia interrupted me.

“Could you please refrain from using that kind of language?” She asked, but it sounded more like an order. I brought my hands over my face as I pouted out a whimper.

“Can’t I just go home… I don’t belong here…” I whimpered, but not in a scared way, more of a pouty way.

“Uhm… I might know where he came from… kind of…” Twilight stated and we all looked over to her. “I uhm… might have… used an advanced teleportation spell that might have…” Twilight began.

* * *

Equestria, Sunday evening…

Twilight sat atop her bed and looked to the stars far above in the midnight sky. Her head drooped as she sighed to herself. Ever since she had become a princess, it had been her every wish to become a great teacher like Celestia was to her.

But regardless of how much she wanted to be a mentor, she could never find a well suited candidate to be her student. She flopped down to her belly and levitated over a spell book she had recently started reading, ‘Ancient Magica, By Star Swirl The Bearded'.

She opened the book to where she had left off. It informed her of various magical spells meant to reshape objects and even change the density if the user desired. As the night dragged on, Twilight found it difficult to keep her eyes open.

Ever so gradually, her eyes would take longer to blink. Soon after that, she began to nod her head in drowsiness then perk up before she drifted into deep sleep. Then, as the night struck early morning, she finally gave into her body’s exhaustion and fell asleep, with her face resting on the chapter titled ‘Unfinished spells'.

The next morning came quicker than she expected, and to her surprise, Spike was shaking her hindleg. “Twilight! Come on Twi, breakfast is done!” Spike stated. Twilight gasped as she lept out of bed, her wings sprang out, knocking over her lamp.

“Whoops… ah haha…” Twilight chuckled sheepishly as she set her lamp back on the nightstand. She looked to Spike and sniffed the air, the aroma of fresh cooked potatoes and eggs filled the air. “Mmm… that smells really good Spike…”

Hours later…

Twilight took one last look at the spell description before she focused her magic. Her horn sputtered out globs of magical energy as the ground shook a little beneath her hooves. She clenched her eyes shut as she sharpened her focus to try and get the spell right.

According to the book, it was an unfinished spell by Star Swirl and was some sort of advanced teleportation spell. Twilight was determined to figure out the secret to this particular one and complete it. It was something which she had been doing all day, but so far she had no such luck.

“Come on… come on…” She grunted before her horn suddenly backfired, sending her tumbling back and crashing into Spike.

“Twilight… Twilight… I can’t breathe!” Spike’s muffled voice could be heard from underneath her body as she quickly sat up and scratched her head, ignoring her now gasping best helper.

“Hmm… well I wonder if…” Twilight muttered to herself as she began focusing her magic again.

Spike tried to speak, “Uhm Twilight… maybe we should stop for lunch. You never know, maybe after eating you’ll have more energy?” He suggested, but Twilight still ignored him, absolutely determined to complete this spell.

She grunted as her horn fumed out spurts of energy and finally, a powerful beam of energy shot out but dissipated only a few feet away from Twilight. She stared in disbelief. “But… but… I did it perfectly that time!” She gasped.

Spike’s hand rested on her side. “Don’t let it bother you Twi… hey, maybe we could stop at Sugarcube corner and get something good to eat,” Spike offered. Twilight drooped her head before taking a glance at the book.

“You know what Spike… you’re right! Let’s go get something to eat, I’ll figure this spell out later,” she announced with a smile before stuffing the book into her saddle bag and departing with her baby dragon friend.

* * *

Present time…

“So that’s about it…” Twilight said. Celestia stood there with a look of worry on her face.

“Okay so… can’t you just do it again and send me home?” I asked, but Celestia answered my question with some really bad news, probably the worst I had heard all day.

“I’m afraid not… if this is the spell which I think it is… then you will not be able to return home. The spell was too dangerous to complete, because if the ending to the spell is used, then it may create a rupture between the dimensions… it is bad enough that it was used to get you here…” Celestia said in a serious tone.

“Celestia, I’m sooo sorry, I had no idea that…” Twilight began to apologize, but Celestia rested an assuring hoof on her shoulder.

“Fret not Twilight Sparkle. Nothing bad has seemed to happen… in fact… I have an idea that you might just like…” I had a terribly awful gut wrenching feeling about this...

Author's Note

I've played the naughty key trick on Ford technicians before when I get my oil changed. They're like "Hey man, your truck won't start" and I ask "Did you talk naughty to her first?" and their faces will go pale, I'll get in the driver seat and act like you actually have to talk naughty then I'll start it. Then the technicians usually state "Man, your truck is weird, eh"

Chapter 3

*Contains explicit scenes*

"Sex Ed. always gave me the shivers…"

March 10th, 2014…

So, to wrap up the last six or seven months, basically I was stuck in a world of ponies and mythical creatures. There were a few positive points: there were no major wars that ravaged millions of lives, no gangs that terrorized city streets and no corrupt governments that lie to their country and put the world in debt.

But at the same time there were downsides: No guns, nothing in the way of modern transportation and, worst of all, ponies didn’t like the idea of eating meat. That meant no bacon in the morning with my toast and eggs.

Twilight had taken me under her wing as her ‘faithful’ student and was teaching me a bunch of stuff about magic and friendship and… actually, I barely listened to her teachings, so I had no idea what she goes on about.

Instead I built a vehicle shelter for my truck so that it wouldn’t be affected by the weather elements. I became a recluse and hid myself in Twilight’s basement for the last seven or eight months.

Every so often I’d run my truck for a few minutes just to make sure it would stay running, but other than that I stayed in the basement. I always feared the day that I'd run out of fuel. I didn’t know if this place had diesel, but in the meantime I wasn’t really feeling like going around to find out.

Twilight constantly insisted that I go out and make friends. But I’d always state that I had enough friends, which by my count wasn’t any at all. Maybe her, but we rarely did anything at all together as friends.

I guess I talked to that cute mail pony, Derpy. I didn’t like the other guy that did mail delivery, he was scruffy and always smelt like cigarettes.

At the beginning of my ‘exile’, so to speak, all I did was sit in the basement and work out. I would’ve enjoyed sitting on my ass and watching television or playing videogames, but this place was stuck in some kind of mixed era.

It was like a Victorian age, medieval royal guards and princesses, but at the same time had a 50s kind of swing to it. Bowling alleys, swanky restaurants, old dial phones, televisions, of which was mostly black and white television shows. If ponies were lucky an 'In color!' show might come out, the latter of the list had apparently just recently been invented.

I laid across the workout bench and gripped the press bars. “I’m gonna die…” I muttered as I began to lift the 275 lb weighted bar. I grunted as I lowered it down to my chest. “Spike… music please?” I asked.

As I became more and more solitary, Spike must’ve became more and more curious about me because he was usually the one to bring down my food. Then one day he just out and tried to talk to me.

I kept the conversation short and blunt, answering his questions with either yes or no, even if it didn’t make sense. I remember he once asked how old I was and I replied with ‘Yes.’

One day I must’ve been feeling sappy because I answered the age question with ‘Eighteen… my birthday is the twelfth of July.’ After that day we started talking a little more, then as time went on we talked more and more. Ever so slowly, he became like my buddy, except he didn’t work out with me, rather he just watched in fascination.

I told him that being such a young age, working out might hinder his growth. So he just watched and talked with me. It was an alright gig I guess, though I had to really curb my swearing.

Spike flicked on the music box and slipped in one of my CDs. Some things were more or less from the present era and it really confused the hell out of me sometimes. ‘No videogames, but we have cordless radios…’ I thought to myself. They have magic and stuff but haven’t invented: automobiles, guns or videogames… well they had motorized carriages, but they were more like the old Ford Model Ts from way back. Musical tunes interrupted my thoughts as I began to push the bar upwards.

It was actually a really great gig, not only did I not have to deal with ridiculous ponies all day by secluding myself, but I was starting to look more like Arnold Schwarzenegger when he played in Commando.

‘Push it to the limit
Walk along a razor’s edge
But don’t look down just keep your head
And you’ll be finished…’

I continued my reps and my muscles quickly began to burn. It was fascinating, back on earth before I came here I rarely worked out and barely managed to bench around 250.

Now in just six months I was easily lifting 275. Spike was always fascinated by how much I could lift, saying how he wished he was as big as me then something like, “Then I’d be able to hook up with Rarity,” whatever that meant. It always made me smile at times when he’d talk about how big I was, and when nopony was around, I’d go and pose in the mirror.

‘Open up the limit
Past the point of no return
You’ve reached the top but still you gotta learn
How to keep it…’

As I reached my eighth rep, I began grunting to try and keep the bar steady. “Evan! Are you okay?!” Spike asked worriedly. I nodded as a strained frown came across my face.

‘Hit the wheel and double mistakes
Throttle wide open like a bat out of hell
And you crash the gates
CRASH THE GATES…’

As I reached the tenth rep I found it rather difficult to keep focus and balance. I winced and Spike gasped. “I’m good… I’m good…” I muttered through a grunt. He gulped as he continued to watch me with worry on his face. If something was to go wrong, it wouldn’t end nicely. He wasn’t nearly strong enough to even help me with the weights and I didn’t know if Twilight was home or not.

‘Going for the back of beyond
Nothing gonna stop you
There’s nothing that strong
So close now you’re nearly at the brink
So, push it, ooh yeah…’

“Eleven…” I grunted as I began to really push myself. I had been at this all morning and it was finally getting to me. According to my clock, it was eight o’clock, so that meant I had been at this for five hours, having woken up at three so that I could eat before anyone else was up.

‘Welcome to the limit… limit
Take it maybe one step more
The power game’s still playing so
You better win it…’

“TWELVE!” I announced loudly as I forced my last bit of strength out and extended my arms to their full length, the heavy bar resting atop of my palms.

“EVAN! Are you okay?!” I heard a worried voice yell out from upstairs.

“Oh great… the science Nazi.” I muttered as I rested the bar on the hooks and sat up. Twilight came racing down the stairs but was shocked to see the sight in front of her… either that or the smell.

I sat there in my signature camouflage cargo pants with a tight white V-neck t-shirt that was dampened from sweat around my collar, along with my back. Spike was dressed in a similar t-shirt but he had red trainer shorts on. The music still played in the background as I just sat there with a blank expression on my face, panting heavily.

‘Push it to the limit… LIMIT
No one left to stand in your way
You might get careless, but you’ll never be safe
While you still feel it…’

Twilight lowered the music to a low simmer so she could speak without arguing with the radio. “Evan… I heard you yell… are you alright?” She asked worriedly and I nodded before laying back down, readying myself for another set.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,” I replied without any expression whatsoever. Before I knew it, she was standing over me with a worried look.

“I used to be like you once,” she informed me and I laughed. She rolled her eyes, “Well, maybe not the whole bodybuilding thing, but I never got out. I always figured there was no use for friends and all I needed was books… but I was wrong. And one day I learned the…” But before she could finish I cut her off.

“Yeah, yeah. You learned the magic of friendship and you went on mystical adventures, while still learning about friendship until one day, you became an alicorn and were crowned a princess,” I stated in an annoyed tone as I placed my hands on the steel bar.

As I began to lift, a purple aura encased the bar and held it down. I grunted furiously and tried to lift it but found my struggle to be futile. “Evan… you’re pushing yourself too hard…” she stated. I looked to Spike and nodded. He gulped then cranked the radio.

‘PUSH IT TO THE LIMIT
LIMIT…’

Twilight quickly turned the radio off by unplugging it with her magic. “Evan, please listen to me for just a second, would you?” She pleaded. I sighed before giving a powerful thrust with my arms.

The thrust briefly overpowered her magic and allowed me to lift the rather heavy set of weights. The bar lifted off the hooks and into the air, but her magic quickly brought it down towards me. “FUCK!” I yelled as my eyes went wide. The hairs on the back of my neck prickled up as all my senses sharpened. Time seemed to slow, Spike's eyes went wide as he watched the bar drop down. Twilight held her left hoof up to her mouth in absolute horror.

I released my grip on the bars and quickly slide out from under it, the bar briefly brushing my hair as it slammed downwards, crashing into the floorboards and cracking the furnished wood floor. It felt as if a gust of wind blew against the back of my head as everything returned to normal. My senses all settled down and I took a deep breath while I slowly rubbed the sweat away from my face in one fluid swipe.

I stood up with my right eyebrow raised. “Huh… well that makes my Monday… almost died…” I muttered with a laugh and Twilight gasped.

“Why… would you try that?! You knew exactly what would happen!” She scolded me and I shrugged. “Don’t just shrug and act like it was nothing, YOU COULD’VE BEEN KILLED!” She yelled, tears starting to come from her eyes.

“I... ‘could’ve’ been killed. See, the key word in that sentence is… ‘Could’ve’, but in the end I didn’t die, so it’s alright,” I stated in a professional voice. She lept up to her hind legs before grabbing the collar of my shirt and shaking me, tears now flowing freely down her face.

“EVAN, YOU CAN’T JUST TAKE THAT OUTLOOK ON LIFE!” She yelled, tears now rolling down her face. I looked back to Spike then shrugged. Jeez, this was like the third time this month she’d cried about something like this.

The first time was the second day of the month when that dresser fell on top of me, after I had been squirming to get atop of it to grab something of Spike’s. Of course it was terribly unlikely that it would’ve killed me, but she still cried about it when she found out I had a bruised rib.

The second time was when I was helping Spike move some stuff and fell down the flight of stairs, hurting my back but having a heavy book shelf crash down on me as well. It was more likely to have killed me and she had cried about it for probably an hour because I wouldn’t take it seriously.

“You know… you’re acting too much like my mother. She was always like ‘I feel like I’ve failed as a parent, you’re self-dependent and we rarely talk anymore.’ Then she'd drink some more and forget about it.” I laughed but Twilight shook me again with tears still streaming down her face. Before I knew it, she was hugging me tightly.

I let out a deep sigh before returning the embrace. The more and more I hated to admit it, she was becoming more of a motherly figure than even my mom. Not to say my mom was a bad parent, but she worked night shifts at Purolator and slept during the day, so as a kid I rarely spent time with her. Then, when I was older and had a job, I rarely even saw her, despite living in the same house.

“Evan… please take life more seriously…” She wept and I sighed before stepping back from the hug.

“Fine… I’ll take life more seriously, not seriously, but more seriously,” I stated. Living in a world of magic and stuff, you couldn’t really take life seriously at all. She sniffled a bit then wiped her nose.

“Thank you… and one more thing?” She asked hopefully. I let out a somewhat irritated exhale that blew my hair out of my face. ‘I should probably get a haircut soon…’ I thought to myself.

“Can you please go out and make some friends today?” She asked. I rolled my eyes.

“Hey Spike, wanna be friends today? Good, there, I’ve made some friends.” I replied snidely. She rested a hoof over her still tear ridden face and began to weep louder, obviously trying to make me feel bad. “Fine! Fine! I’ll go out and make some friends.” I said as I threw my hands up into the air. She took her hoof away from her face and smiled brightly, though she still sniffled a bit.

I walked past Twilight and gave her a nod before regretfully walking up the stairs to the main floor of the house. I looked out the window only to see it was dark out, and raining. “Oh for the love of… I hate Mondays,” I muttered.

I walked over to the door and opened it. A gust of wind blew rain into my face, forcing me to close my eyes for a moment before proceeding outside, shutting the door behind me and venturing out into the town.

Rain immediately drenched me and made me feel miserable. “If I’m going anywhere today… it’s in Cadance,” I muttered before stepping into the car shelter. The rain splashing against the tin roof echoed inside the shelter, giving the atmosphere a rather relaxing feel.

I opened the driver door and reached into the back, grabbing a pair of fresh clothes, which were the same pair that I was currently wearing but dry. I changed my clothes quickly, tossing my wet ones in the back, before hopping in the truck and starting it.

“Oooh Cadance, let’s go wheeling!” I smiled. It had been the first time in a while that I had been out in the rain with her, but I always liked splashing around with a truck on a rainy day.

I drove around town, but not even five minutes into driving and I saw three fillies rushing through the pouring rain. I immediately recognized them. ‘Hey that’s Sweetiebloom, Scootaloo, and Applebelle… I think that’s what their names are…’ I thought as I pulled the truck up beside them and rolled down the driver side window.

“Uhm, hey… listen I know that your sisters probably tell you not to drive with strangers but… do you want a ride? It’s raining.” I asked. The three looked to each other, then back to me and nodded gratefully.

I quickly set down some towels down on the seats. I usually had towels in my truck to set down across the seat when my boss would ask me to take his dogs to the dog groomer. I reached over to the driver side door and pulled up on the door lever then gave the door a small push. The passenger door swung open and the three fillies all cocked their heads in the same direction, making me chuckle slightly. A second passed and they all lept in with one unison leap, landing across the front seat. The dog towels quickly soaked up the dripping wetness from their bodies.

“What were you fillies doing out in the rain?” I asked and Scootaloo answered.

“Trying to get to school,” she replied as she shook like a dog. ‘So much for the towel idea,’ I thought to myself.

“Oh right… school… I always hated school,” I told them as I slipped the truck into drive and drove towards the local school.

“WHY?!” They all gasped and I looked to them like it was a stupid question.

“Because… I just didn’t like school. Maybe it was my teacher or…” I was quickly cut off by the trio.

“Oh, well maybe you should come to school with us! You’ll love Ms. Cheerilee, she’s really nice!” They all said together. I shrugged as I waved my hand.

“Nah, I got out of school so that I…” but once again they interrupted me.

“PLEASE!” They all pouted before giving me adorable puppy dog eyes. I groaned before nodding reluctantly. As cold as I wanted to be, I just couldn’t resist those damn adorable eyes.

“Okay, okay… I’ll go to school with you... but just this one day,” I agreed. They all cheered and clapped their hooves together. ‘I really don’t understand what the big deal is… I’m just going to school with them.’ I thought.

I looked into the back and grabbed a box of Twinkies. I had several boxes but had to keep my eating habits rather short. I didn’t know if this world had any Twinkies, and besides, these would last forever anyway, so I’d be in no rush to finish them off before an expiry date, which didn’t exist on the box.

As I drove using my knees to steer, I opened the fresh box and pulled out a Twinkie before indulging myself into its deliciousness. I let out a ‘Mmm…’ as I swallowed the remainder of it.

As I clucked my tongue I looked over to the three fillies who all looked at me with curious faces. “Want one?” I asked as I offered the trio some Twinkies.

“What are they?” Sweetiebloom asked. I shrugged and pulled one out for the each of them, opening the wrapper and setting one in each of their respective hooves.

“Twinkies… they’re good,” I said. They each cautiously took a bite then mouthed it around inside their mouths before swallowing. All of a sudden they all quickly gobbled up the rest of the treat quicker than I could blink. They all looked back to me with pleading looks and I sighed. ‘So much for conserving my Twinkies…’ I thought before handing them the box.

They thrashed it open and quickly devoured the remaining treats, but as they looked at the last one, then to each other and then finally to me, they all asked in unison. “Would you like the last one?”

I was about to say, ‘No thanks, you go ahead,’ but then realized that they would have to cut it up or something to share it. “Uhm… yeah sure, why not?” I replied hesitantly. Scootaloo managed to rip the rapper open with her teeth, getting drool onto the Twinkie before handing it to me.

I looked at the drool infested Twinkie, then back to the joyest fillies who all looked to me with loving eyes. I slowly gulped then ate the Twinkie in one gulp, not really wanting to taste her saliva.

“Mmm… thanks,” I said and they all continued to smile brightly. As we pulled up to the school, the sun seemed to instantly come out as the clouds quickly disappeared. I was about to comment on how retarded this was, then remembered that I had younglings in the truck with me, meaning I couldn’t go off on a hitch. ‘Stupid mother fucking cock sucking piece of shit Monday fucking weather…’ I thought to myself.

“Uhh… here we are… school…” I said unsurely. They all looked to me with dumbfounded looks on their faces. “Well… aren’t we going to go inside?” I asked but Applebelle answered before the other two.

“How do we get out?” She asked. I nearly face palmed from my own stupidity. 'No, of course they wouldn't...' I leaned over and opened the passenger side door. They all hopped out before shaking off, water splashing about and some of it landing back inside my truck.

Just as I was about to step out, one of those new high class motorized carriages pulled up. A butler looking stallion walked to the rear and opened the door before graciously allowing two high-class looking fillies to step out.

“I hate rich ponies…” I muttered. Technically I didn’t hate rich ponies in general, just the ones who boasted that they were rich and gave their kids everything. The snooty looking one with the crown walked with her nose in the air before sneering at the fillies I had driven to school.

“Ha… what is that thing you were in? It looks… poor,” she laughed. My brow furrowed. Okay... a Ford isn't exactly a Rolls Royce but this is my truck she's referring to.

“It’s totally awesome! way better than your carriage!” Scootaloo shot back. The crown wearing filly laughed aloud.

“Ha, that thing could hardly even be described as an eyesore!” She shot back. ‘Alright, that’s it! My truck is not an eyesore!’ I thought to myself before opening the driver side door and stepping out.

Everypony looked to me. Most in the town knew me, but only as ‘That thing that wears camouflage and never talks to anypony.’ “Okay, for the record, Cadance here is way more awesome than your… thing.” I told the snooty filly as I waved my hand at the carriage like it was some failure of god.

“Yeah, Diamond Tiara!” The trio of fillies snapped back.

“Ha, prove it!” She laughed snidely. I shrugged before going to the back and grabbing some pull chains.

“Okay," I said as I grabbed some chains out of the back. "Hook these up to the back of your carriage, then I’ll hook them up to the back of my truck and we’ll see which one has more power,” I laughed, knowing full well that my truck would easily best the carriage.

Her carriage didn’t use fossil fuels, but rather some sort of magic for power. I could tell because this one lacked a muffler. Regardless, I had never seen any of them pulling a heavy load, the most being a small table, which severely hindered its speed to a slow crawl.

“Ha! Why would I risk damaging my father’s carriage when…” She began but I cut her off.

“Ohhhhh, so it’s not even yours? Well you see, this here truck is mine, all mine. And these three fillies are my friends and I drive them around wherever they want to go,” I lied with a laugh. Well maybe it wasn't a complete lie, they were sort of my friends... I think.

“Oh really? So why haven’t we seen you driving them before?” She asked snidely.

“Because walking is healthier,” I said, which wasn’t really a lie, but at the same time didn’t answer her question. Everypony in the crowd quickly forgot about the little competition and began conversing with the trio, asking things like 'Is he really your friend?' or 'Is it comfortable in that thing he drives?'

Diamond Tiara scowled as everypony neglected her. Soon a voice called out that caught everypony’s attention. “Children, class is starting!” A burgundy mare called out. While the others quickly hurried to the schoolhouse, the trio grabbed my hands.

“Ah’m Applebloom.” The one whom I had thought was Applebelle introduced.

“Yeah, and I’m Sweetie Belle,” said the one that I used to think was Sweetiebloom.

The third one tried to fly but couldn’t manage to get off the ground. “And... I’m… Scootaloo!” She announced, trying painfully to fly. Well at least I got one of them right. I held her by the back of her neck and leveled her face with mine. She looked to me with exhausted eyes.

“Don’t kill yourself kid… I already think you’re cool, so you don’t have to go showing off. By the way, I’m Evan, but you can call me Burdy if you like,” I stated. She lept out of my hands and into the air with an excited gasp.

“You… You think I’m cool?” She asked hopefully before landing on the ground. I shrugged. The four of us began walking towards the schoolhouse as I looked to the sky. ‘Stupid weather pegasus… I bet they planned this out…’ I thought to myself as I looked to the beautiful sunny sky.

We entered the classroom and the teacher looked over. “And whom might you be?” She asked curiously.

“He’s Burdy!” The three gasped excitedly. “Can he stay for class?” They asked hopefully. The teacher scratched her chin as she thought about it for a moment.

“How old are you?” She asked.

“Eighteen,” I replied quickly and she nodded with a shrug. The trio cheered and quickly ran for their seats. I could see that Tiara and her friend were obviously not impressed by the class’s recent addition.

“Okay class, open your books to page 43, we’ll start where we left off,” the teacher announced. I picked up a book from the pile that she picked hers up from before extending my hand.

“My name is actually Evan, but you can call me Burdy if yah fancy,” I introduced myself. She smiled as she too extended her hoof.

“Well… for this lesson I’ll have to refrain from calling you Burdy and address you as Mr. Evan, for respect of course,” she stated, before shaking my hand and introducing herself. “My name is Ms. Cheerilee,” she stated.

“Okay children as we all remember…” She began but was cut off suddenly by snickering and Tiara laughing out loud.

“BLANK FLANK!” Tiara sneered. Cheerilee groaned with an annoyed tone.

“What’s blank flank?” I asked and my reply quickly came.

“Those three!” Tiara laughed as she pointed to my three new… friends. “They don’t have their cutie marks!” Tiara laughed.

“So?” I asked. 'What was the big deal? I mean, I wouldn’t want some tattoo looking thing appearing on my ass one day. What if it was something stupid, like a gay pride flag… god that would be embarrassing.' I thought to myself.

“What do you mean what’s wrong with that? Everything’s wrong with that. They haven’t figured out their special talent.” She let out a snide giggle.

“So, it just means that they still have adventures to go on to figure out that talent. They could get the most bad ass…” I was interrupted by Cheerilee as she gave an irritated cough.

“Please don’t swear,” She told me.

“Sorry… they could have the most kick… flank, cutie marks ever. They could have… super strength cutie marks, or adventuring cutie marks or… what’s your cutie mark supposed to mean anyway? It’s just a stupid crown thing.” Every kid in the classroom began to laugh as I made the last comment. Tiara went to interject but Cheerilee gave another loud cough.

“AHEM… yes, well back on subject please,” she stated before beginning the lesson. I began to wander off in my thoughts as she taught the children about mathematics and equations and stuff. I switched my thoughts to more interesting things, which ended up with me thinking about dinosaurs eating unicorns.

Before I knew it, the bell rang and the children were all leaving. I went to leave as well but Cheerilee rested a hoof on my shoulder, stopping me for a moment. “Do you know much about ponies? Magic, flying, that sort of thing?” She asked and I shook my head. “Well, if that’s the case, perhaps you wouldn’t mind staying late so that I can teach you the basic things you’ll need to know,” she suggested.

I nodded. “Alright, just let me drive the fillies home,” I told her. She nodded as I walked outside and searched for the three fillies I had recently become acquainted with. I spotted them and quickly made my way over. As I walked towards them, I noticed other kids getting picked up by their parents or walking home in large groups.

The trio were waiting by the truck as I casually walked over to them. “So, where to boss?” I asked, acting like what I thought a chauffeur might act like.

“Home.” They all stated. I opened the passenger side door and bowed graciously, hoping that I didn’t look too much like an idiot.

I heard Tiara’s voice scowl and looked over to her. “You buffoon… bow… like he did!” She scowled while pointing over to me. Her chauffeur raised an eyebrow before bowing. She stepped into the carriage with grace and I rolled my eyes before closing the door and walking over to the driver side.

I heard the carriage start and quite frankly, it sounded like a hairdryer. I closed the passenger side door then made my way around to the driver side, all the while watching that stupid carriage. I shrugged before hopping into the driver seat, shutting the door behind me, and starting the truck. The idle alone sounded better than the carriage.

“Applebloom lives at Sweet Apple Acres, but Scootaloo and I live in town,” Sweetie Belle informed me. I slipped the truck into drive and pulled away, leaving several fillies and colts watching in fascination while the trio waved out the window with smiles on their faces.

I got this weird, warm feeling inside me, like I had done something right for a change and in turn made myself feel better about life… maybe it was just the weather.

* * *

An hour passed before I pulled the truck up in front of the school. I had a half a tank left in the rear tank and after that was gone, I only had the front tank, which was full. I fretted about what I would do when I ran out of fuel but quickly brought myself together.

I turned off the truck while still humming the tunes to the song I had just recently been listening to. “What is love? Baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more…” I put a sway in my pace as I walked along.

“I want no other, no other lover…” I continued to put sway in my pace until I reached the front door, then I got serious. I took a deep breath then knocked on the door.

“Come in…” Said a seemingly breathtaking voice. For some reason, the voice sounded super sexy, but at the same time it sent chills down my spine. I opened the door and stepped inside, only to see Cheerilee sitting on the desk, her right leg arched over her left with a white teacher’s blouse that was unbuttoned near the top. I let out another deep and nervous breath as my heart began to thump. ‘Uh-oh… into the dragon’s nest there Burdy…’ I thought to myself.

“You can close the door behind you.” I did as she asked but, before stepping forwards, she once again asked me to do something, but it came from a calm and gentle tone. “Oh, and can you lock it as well?” She asked. My heart began to pound harder as I locked the door behind me and just stood there, like the big dumb brute that I was.

I calmed my breathing and smiled. “Afternoon Ms.” I said in a polite tone. She nodded and offered me a seat beside her. I gulped and took the offer, figuring it would be rude not to.

“So to what do I owe the honor, Mr…?” She asked in a blissful voice.

“Burdick… Evan Burdick, but you can just call me Burdy,” I stammered like a fool. She smiled.

“Well, it’s a pleasure to finally have a more formal meeting Mr. Burdick,” she told me in a calm tone. My heart began to ease and slow, I had obviously gotten the wrong idea when she had asked me to lock the door.

“So why’d I lock the door?” I asked, but rather than answer the question, she pulled out a book about ponies, ‘Inspector Cell in the land of U.’ I raised an eyebrow as I began to flip through the book.

Eventually my entire body calmed down as she began teaching me everything I was going to need to know about ponies.

As the afternoon went on, it became evening, and before we knew it, it was 8:00pm. “Damn," I muttered under my breath before looking to Cheerilee. "Well Cherry, I gotta go,” I said but she rested a hoof on my shoulder before looking into my eyes with hers.

“Did you… just call me Cherry?” She asked and I gulped.

“Uhm yeah… sorry about that, it must’ve slipped,” I apologized.

“Nopony has ever called me Cherry before…” She trailed off as she blushed timidly. She began to wave her hoof in front of her face to try and cool herself off. “Is it just me or is it hot in here?” She asked. “Oh actually, speaking of heat, there is one more thing you should learn before you leave…” She pulled out a magazine and flopped it on my lap.

The front cover had a breathtaking mare on it that was dressed in a rather peculiar way. The title read ‘Playcolt’ and I gulped as my heart began to race again. Cheerilee flipped the magazine to a random page and I looked to the picture in front of me.

There was an explicit picture of a pony vagina that was puffy and dripping with juices. “Uhm… well that’s real fascinating…” I stuttered.

“It’s what a mare looks like when she’s in heat… it really is hot in here. I think I’ll have to take this off,” she stated. I sheepishly lowered the book to see what she was doing. The light cherry coated pony slowly unbuttoned her blouse then slipped her clothes off. My heart began to thump harder in my chest. "You know..." she whispered through a breath, "It's Ms. Cheerilee... I'm not married." Her voice made made me gasp as my eyes stayed wide and locked on her body.

I had technically seen her naked today, but just the way she was moving right now… I felt my buddy stiffen and make a tent out of my pants. I quickly pressed the magazine down atop of my groin to try and hide my erection, but she must’ve noticed.

She slowly stepped over and sat on my lap before planting a kiss on my lips. I gulped before she gently pushed my body back against the desk and laid me flat. “I’ll show you what a mare in heat looks like for real…” She told me before turning and placing her rump right in front of my face.

Her snatch was puffy, just like the picture, but it was just a little different. It was a little smaller and tighter looking, that and she was absolutely soaked. Her juices already dripped down onto my face and filled the air with a musky scent.

It smelt rather pleasant, but that might’ve just been my arousal. Her lips began to quiver and clench, obviously anticipating me to do something. “Please… rut me…” Cheerilee pleaded in a hushed tone.

I was already this far, though she was the one who dragged me here, so I supposed that perhaps I should finish. I placed my right hand over her slit before giving a gentle downwards rub. Her juices clung to my hand and made it feel like I was rubbing along velvety ice.

I gave a nervous and deep breath as I used my two thumbs to spread apart her lips. I saw her hole clench shut from the contact and I leaned my face forwards, tongue already slipping out of my mouth.

‘Well… Twilight said you needed to make friends…’ my conscience told me. ‘Shut up you… I doubt this is what she meant. ‘Dear Twilight Sparky, today I learned that a mare in heat makes a great fuck buddy.’ Yeah that’ll go over super well.’ I thought.

‘Of course it wouldn’t go over well, you know that she hates it when you make nicknames for her.’ My conscience thought back. I wanted to facepalm from my own stupidity, but a gasping moan interrupted my inner arguments.

Cheerilee was enjoying herself to great extent. She began to rock her hips against my face as I continued to lather her folds with my tongue. She constantly would allow a whispered ‘Ooh’ or ‘Ahh’ to escape her mouth.

I felt her front hooves fiddling with my belt but was unable to get it undone. “How do you... mmm… get this… aah… out?” She asked through several moans.

I grasped her midsection and turned her around. “I’ll get it, Cherry,” I whispered before unbuckling my belt. She began to cover my face in sloppy wet kisses. Soon, as I began slipping off my pants and boxers, she forced her mouth upon mine. I finally got my boxers off and gulped.

“Uhm… it’s out…” I said shakily. Cheerilee looked down then observed it more closely.

“Indeed… it does look different. It doesn’t look at all like a stallion’s… and it's a little smaller…” She began. I rolled my eyes, 'Figures that she'd care about something like that.' She must've caught my blunt expression because she leaned down and whispered into my ear. "But not by much, 'Big boy'." She put heavy emphasis on 'Big boy' and it seemed to drive me wilder. God, how the hell was she doing this?

She lay atop of me and gave me a sensual kiss as she guided her rump down atop of my shaft. As her entrance touched the tip of my rod, we both gasped from the contact. She looked to me with loving eyes before slowly enveloping my cock inside of her.

I gasped as she slid down my entire length. I felt her walls fit snuggly around me as my heart began to thump at an even quicker pace. She slowly moved her rump upwards, eventually pulling her love tunnel off my member. I twitched and yearned for the need to be back inside her.

“I bet you can’t wait to be back inside me?” She asked in a seductive voice. I nodded willingly, almost like I had been brainwashed. She began to lower herself down upon me again.

As we started to become one again, she began to moan my name. “Oh… Evan… Evan… EVAN?!” It was more like a question...

My mind snapped as I came back to reality. I found myself still sitting in the chair, looking blankly at the porno magazine in front of me. “EVAN!” I heard a voice yell. I set the magazine down and looked to see Cheerilee struggling to reach something atop a bookshelf.

I shook off the recent daydream I just had and figured she had probably showed me that for good reason. “Hey, are you just going to sit there or will you help me out?” She asked.

I stood up and walked over, only to see that she was trying to fiddle with the air vents leading through the roof of the room. I reached up and gave it a light tap. The fan atop the vent began to hum but quickly conked out again.

Cheerilee gave a huff. “It always gets way too hot in this classroom with these old things constantly breaking down…” She muttered before once again trying to fix the ventilation fan.

“Here… let me try.” I told her, before moving her aside and giving the vent a harder hit with side of my fist. The fan began to slowly hum to life but didn’t conk out this time. ‘Thanks Fonzie.’ I thought to myself as I stepped back from the vent.

Cheerilee nodded with a smile on her face. “Thanks… I hope it’ll stay running this time.” She told me. I gulped and looked over to her.

“Uhm… don’t get mad but uhh… you weren’t trying to say anything by showing me that magazine were you?” I asked hesitantly. She looked to me with an unsure look. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to say anything bad about you it’s just… well… I don't know much about formalities but... well...” I trailed off, hoping that I hadn’t angered the mare.

“Well?...” She asked as she raised an eyebrow.

“Well… uhm… you’re not… in heat are you?” I asked. She gasped as her eyes went wide. I wasn’t sure if she was just about to get angry, or if I had just insulted her. “No wait! I didn’t mean it in a bad way or whatever, I just put two and two together then got five, you know!” I quickly interrupted her.

She laughed before placing a hoof over her face. “You should really pay more attention in class,” she laughed. I raised an eyebrow and she continued to laugh. “Two and two is four,” she told me.

“Oh… yeah uhh… I knew that,” I replied in a subtle tone. ‘Maybe she’s right.’ I thought to myself.

“Hey listen… it’s late and I don’t like walking myself home. If it’s not too strange for you, considering what just happened… would you mind taking me home? I’d really appreciate it,” she asked.

“Wait… does this mean we’re friends?” I asked hopefully.

“Well I suppose so,” she replied unsurely, not exactly sure why I was so happy that we were friends.

“Yes! Yeah sure I’ll drive you home, just let me do something first…” I cheered as I pulled out a piece of paper and a pen, quickly scribbling down a letter to Twilight.

‘Dear princess Sparky,
Today I learnt that…’
I stopped writing for a second as I thought to myself. ‘What the hell did I just learn about friendship?’ I quickly nodded to myself as I thought up an answer.
‘…sometimes you first meet a pony they is really nice, but then things get out of hand and then you feel like you’re in trouble. If you try to run away from the problem, it could just get worse so you have to stay and settle the problem with your friend. I think that’s something about friendship that’s important and if not, to hell with it because I’m not going outside for at least another week.

Your reluctant student,
Burdy…

Chapter 4

‘I’m saved! Hallelujah, I’m saved… well kind of…’

Wednesday, March 13th 2014…

So in the end, I made four friends that day. Cheerilee and the three fillies: Sweetiebelle, Scootaloo and Applebloom, the latter of the list sharing a striking name with my rifle.

On top of that, Twilight noted that despite my lack of enthusiasm about friendship, I was well on my way. Oh, and I guess I got a porno magazine in the process, so I guess the pros outweigh the cons.

I grunted as I clenched my eyes shut in furious effort. My face was turning a puffy red as I squirmed about. My elbows were cocked and my hands burned as I gripped the bar harder, trying to give myself any sort of advantage.

“Come on… Come on… COME ON!” I yelled. I grunted before my chin finally rose above the bar. My eyes went wide and I released my grip from the bar, falling to the ground below with a mediocre THUD that echoed throughout the room.

My panting was erratic and Spike stepped over me, looking down with a raised brow. “Well…” He began with confusion in his voice. “You beat your record but…” He trailed off and looked to the bar then back to me. “You only did five… I don’t get it.” He stated with a confused tone.

“EVAN! Are you alright!” I heard Twilight peep up. I looked over to the staircase, only to see her peering down at me with a look of worry on her face.

I rolled my eyes before standing up and stretching my back. “Yeah… yeah I’m fine.” I replied as I looked to the floor. A hint of curiosity enticed me and I looked back to her. “How long were you sitting there watching me?” I asked.

She blushed and looked away, covering her cheeks with her hooves to try and conceal it. I rolled my eyes, “I’m not mad or anything. Heck, it’s your house. For all I care, you can watch me while I sleep.” I told her. She looked back to me, her blush now faded away and non-apparent.

“Since eight thirty… I’m sorry. I should have told you.” She apologized. I waved my hand in a forgiving way.

“Nah, don’t worry about it.” I said as I looked to my watch. It was 9:30am now, meaning she’d been watching me silently for the last hour. ‘That mare finds just about anything interesting… probably even dirt.’ I thought to myself.

Why on earth she’d sit there silently and watch me I’d never know, but at the moment I didn’t much care. Spike interrupted my thoughts. “You can lift more than anypony in town, EVEN BIG MAC... yet you can’t do chin-ups?!” He gasped.

I looked to him with a risen eyebrow. “Are you trying to tell me something?” I chuckled with a smile as I crossed my arms and flexed. He brought his hands up defensively.

“No-no! I’m just saying… it’s strange is all.” He replied. I laughed and tussled my hand across his head. Twilight stepped up beside me and joined in Spike’s curiosity.

“Spike has a point. I’ve seen you climb up the bookshelves yet you can’t seem to manage this particular… workout.” She told me and I sighed.

“Yeah… yeah I was never good at chin-ups. Even with my body the way it is now… I’m still just as terrible as ever.” I laughed wholeheartedly. My stomach grumbled and Spike’s face lit up with a look of excitement.

“Evan’s hungry! Twilight can we go to Sugarcube Corner?!” Spike asked, more like pleaded. Twilight scratched her head unsurely.

“I don’t know Spike… I’m trying to cut back on sweets…” She trailed off as she thought more and more about the topic. ‘God, she makes everything so goddamned difficult. I mean, you could ask her what two plus two is, and she’d make it a goddamned equation that stretches across an entire blackboard.’ My thoughts were cut off by Spike.

“I could just go with Evan!” He stated hopefully. Generally I wouldn’t go out, but if Spike wanted to go somewhere then I might tag along, but only if it’s because he wants me to go.

I scratched my head. “Uhh… I don’t know Spike. My money is worth nothing in this world.” I told him. Twilight gave me a nudge.

“Well maybe you should get a job, rather than bumming off me all the time.” She laughed playfully.

“Hey! I never bum money off you!” I replied defensively but she just laughed at the comeback.

“Sure, you just sit around down here and eat for free, don’t pay rent…” She laughed as she gave me another nudge. I just rolled my eyes and snickered.

“Yeah… cause I’m sure that Sugarcube Corner really needs a bouncer… or a cashier.” I said as I put on a straight face. “Hey you!” I said as I pointed to an imaginary customer. “YEAH YOU! Buy this 30 bit cake or else!” I said in a lumbering tone. “ ‘Ahh, okay, please don’t hurt me!’” I said, enacting what a pony might say if I did that to them.

I nodded and looked to Spike. “Yeah… that’d go over well.” I said, pretending like it would actually work. Twilight buried her face in her left hoof.

“Ugh… you’re hopeless.” She groaned. I clapped my hands together, a loud slap echoing in the room, before fist pumping.

“Score one for Burdy.” I muttered to myself. I clenched my fists and readied myself to try another set of chin-ups. Just as I was about to jump up, Twilight placed a hoof on my shoulder.

I turned to see her standing on her hindlegs with a sly smile on her face. “My friend Applejack needs some help pulling the wagons loaded with saplings around then planting them. I’m sure she could use a brute like you around.” She told me as she rested a hoof on my chest and looked up into my eyes.

“Whatta yah say? I’m sure a big brute like yourself wouldn’t mind lifting heavy things around all day.” She asked. I stifled a laugh and she stepped back and fell to all fours. “What’s so funny? I gave you a job offer.” She stated.

“Oh nothing. Yeah sure, I’ll help. It’s just that my boss used to get me to do a lot of heavy lifting and eventually he gave me the nickname ‘Hercules’.” I told her. She smiled and began to turn but I spoke before she got far. “One condition.” I told her. She stopped and turned around.

“What do you mean? How many conditions can there be to planting trees?” She asked and I stepped forwards.

“I work alone. I don’t want some pony standing next to me blabbering on about friendship and that kind of crap.” I told her. Twilight sighed and rested a hoof over her eyes. I looked to my clothes. My classic M81 camouflage combat jacket and cargo pants, with a white V-neck t-shirt underneath my coat and Terra work boots. It seemed like reasonable work clothing. I picked up my brown cowboy hat and held it by my side, not wanting to place it on my sweaty head.

* * *

A half an hour later…

The orange southern mare standing next to me pointed out to the pasture. “Generally ah don’t start plantin this early but weather’s permittin.” She said in a heavy southern tone.

I looked to the wagon then back to the field. I had probably 200 saplings but the good news was that the dirt was already plowed. That and it was a rather warm day today. “What’s the pay?” I asked and she looked to me with a raised eyebrow.

“Now generally ah don’t have help but ah reckon if yah don’t bellyache or lollygag… ah’ll pay yah fifteen bits an hour. How’s that sound?” She asked.

I nodded and grabbed the tongue of the wagon. “Sounds good boss.” I said as I began to heave the wagon along behind me.

I checked my watch to see that it was 10:32am. Well, if I got this done in good time, I could bring the empty wagon back to the barn, refill, have lunch…

My thoughts trailed off as I realized that not only hadn’t I eaten since 3:30am this morning, but I had forgotten to bring a lunch. “Shit.” I muttered as I approached the planting grounds. I looked to my left hand and slipped of my ‘wedding ring’. I didn’t really want to have to wash it, or lose it.

“Alright you little shits… I’m gonna put you in the ground.” I muttered. One by one, I began taking the saplings off the wagon and planting them. I was surprised to find the dirt as loose as it was.

My footprints were left as evidence in the ground as I continued planting the sapling trees. “Well… this is some good weather. Applejack wasn’t joking.” I told myself. ‘Applejack… what the hell kind of name is that anyway?’ Who decides on naming their kid Applejack?' I asked myself. Everypony in this weird world seemed to have weird ass names.

I kept muttering thoughts to myself as I continued planting. I reached into the waist harness that held extra saplings and felt gross mucky water in the bottom of the harness. I reached around and felt for any extra saplings but there were none.

I looked to the wagon to see that it was empty. I looked to my watch and saw that it was now 11:41am. I rubbed some sweat from my face and began pulling the wagon back to the barn. When I had rubbed my face, dirt and muck smeared across my cheeks and forehead. Grit and muck now dripped down along with the sweat.

In just a few minutes I was back at the barn and looking around for another filled wagon, or at least some more saplings. I quickly spotted two more filled wagons and pulled my empty wagon over and parked it beside the others before grabbing the wagon closest to me.

I would’ve liked to stop for lunch but I had nothing so there was no point really. I pulled the second wagon back to the pasture fields and began planting. I began to muse to myself about what I could be doing if I was back home. I guess right about now I’d be having lunch with my boss.

My stomach grumbled as I remembered my boss’s wife’s cooking. My boss would always invite me to have lunch with him, something about how it was easier that way and how with the way I ate, he never had to eat leftovers for dinner.

I quickly thought about other things but would always come back to thinking about food. Before I knew it I was reaching into an empty pouch and the wagon was empty yet again. My stomach grumbled loudly as I rubbed the back of my neck, smearing mud and grit along the backside, but with my hunger the way it was, the grit and mud didn’t feel all that bad.

“Okay… I’ll park the wagon then get something to eat.” I muttered to my stomach then looked around only to realize that there were no apples on the trees. I looked to my watch, it was still early in the day, only being 1:58pm.

“Well…” I muttered as I pulled the second wagon back to the barn. As I arrived I spotted the third wagon, still loaded with saplings. I left the empty wagon behind and began towing away the final wagon.

I reached the planting ground once more and went back to work, but my stomach began to groan in outrage. “Alright… just shut up for a while longer, would yah!” I hissed.

As I continued planting, my back began to singe from my constant bending over. I stood up and stretched with a groan. Doing some sloppy mental math, I thought to myself. 'Okay, I’ve been working for say… 11:30, 12:30. 1:30, 2:00… so three and a half hours and I got four hundred saplings planted so… I plant a sapling every 5 seconds… that’s probably not right but probably close.’ I thought.

Not being very intellectual in mental math, and lacking any sort of calculator meant I was a little short on my mathematics.

Once again I was surprised when I reached into an empty pouch and felt nothing, then saw nothing on the wagon. I looked to my watch, it was a little past five. 5:03pm to be exact.

I had taken a lot longer with the last batch because I had to constantly stand up and stretch due to my back acting up. Then again I hadn’t stopped all day so it was inevitable.

I yawned and looked around, soon spotting a suitable looking tree. I walked over and plumped myself down beside it. My back seemed to unclasp and my whole body quickly relaxed. My hunger was quickly overcome by exhaustion and my head clunked against the tree trunk.

“Okay Burdy… just a little… nap. Then I'll get some food.” I said through a long yawn. I titled the brim of my dark brown cowboy hat over the front of my face and closed my eyes. The grip of my bowie knife resting in its sheath felt cool against the palm of my hand. I had almost forgotten that I had brought that. My mind quickly became a void of darkness...

* * *

Noises echoed in my mind and my senses finally came to. I found myself looking up at the ceiling of the barn parlour at my boss’s farm. I titled my head down to see the washing machine doing its cycle, cleaning the teat clothes for the cows.

The timer stated it still had at least another five minutes before it was done, giving me time for a power nap. The pipeline sanitizer began its cycle and the suction engine began to hum loudly.

I leaned back in the office chair and let out a sigh of relief. As I closed my eyes, all my other senses became extremely alert. A flake of ceiling dust touched my skin, awaking me from my brief slumber with a jolt of shock and alertness.

I quickly settled and relaxed but the sound of a kitten purring gave my body a jolt and I nearly lept up. “Hey Cheetos…” I muttered, knowing exactly who it was. I rested my head back against the cool black leather of the office chair. The black kitten hopped down to my lap while a similar, yet larger, cat hopped up and nestled down on the top of my right leg. Both cats began to nap with me, all the while purring in a relaxed tone.

Finally a prolonged peace came but as my thoughts became dark and void, an unfamiliar smell filled my nostrils. It smelt like… apples… sweet juicy apples. My peace was disturbed but not enough to wake me.

The sound of grass squishing beneath someone’s foot sounded more like a crack of thunder and the hair on the back of my neck prickled up…

* * *

Time seemed to slow to an absolute stand still. Though it was dark out, everything was pitched in a dark red faze. The thought of imminent danger in the unknown darkness brought my senses to a whole new level.

In a flash motion, my bowie knife was out. I held it with the blade pointed out the bottom side of my hand, ready to slash then stab whatever was approaching me.

My hat fell off my head, allowing my perception to expand. As the darkness seemed to brighten up with my heightened senses, I realized that my mystery figure was actually Applejack.

Though we were still feet away, the gleaming knife blade obviously didn’t ease the situation in the slightest. I titled the blade slightly, bringing the blade out of the moon’s light before sheathing it.

“Woah… Ah didn’t mean nothin by it…” Applejack stated hesitantly. I picked up my hat from off the ground and brushed it off before placing it atop my head.

“Sorry… you just startled me is all.” I stated. She snickered before taking a step forwards.

“Working hard or hardly working?” She teased and I looked to my clock, realizing that it was 10:30pm. I muttered a swear to myself and she stepped closer. “Now, ah can’t pay yah fer staying late while not workin…” She told me and I gave my back a gentle crack.

“Don’t worry bout it. My fault…” I muttered, scorned at myself for having fallen asleep.

“So, how long’d yah work till yah passed out?” She asked. I did the mental math. 10:30-5:00.

“Ten thirty till five… six and a half hours.” She looked at me and did the math.

“How long did yah have fer lunch. Sorry Sugar Cube but ah can’t pay yah while yah weren’t actually workin.” She told me.

“I didn’t. I worked right through lunch.” I told her as my stomach grumbled. She gasped as she brought her hoof up to her mouth.

“Yah didn’t have tah do that!” She gasped and I rolled my eyes before looking away in embarrassment.

“I uhh… didn’t pack a lunch… guess I kind of gapped that small detail.” I replied. She kept her hoof to her mouth in shock.

“Geeze ah… ah don’t know what tah say. Ah coulda made yah somethin, all yah'd have tah do was ask…” She whispered.

I let out a yawn and looked to the field, but with my only moonlight to light the way, it was hard to see the saplings I had planted.

“Well… the wagons are all planted so I guess we’re winning.” I stated and she raised an eyebrow.

“Whatta yah mean ‘The wagons are all planted’?” She asked and I pointed the empty wagon nearby.

“I planted the three wagons you had loaded up. Unless you had some hidden away somewhere that I didn’t know about…” I trailed off but my statement had left her confused.

“How… many wagons of saplings did yah plant?” She asked and I shrugged.

“Three…” I stated as if it wasn’t a big deal. Technically it wasn’t, back when I was working with CFB Borden Roads and Grounds, we planted more than that a day.

“Yah planted… all the other wagons… jeeze that’s three days’ worth a work!” She gasped. I was about to ask how the hell she had come up with the answer but then looked down to her hooves, then to my hands.

I walked over to a planted sapling and dug it up before handing it to Applejack who looked at me with curiosity. “Plant that.” I said and she gave me a weird look. “Can you just… I’d like to see something.” I said. I knelt down beside her and watched as she dug a hole with her hoof then set the sapling in.

However, steadying the small tree and packing down the dirt with hooves was obviously harder than it was with hands. What took me mere seconds, took her a noticeably longer time.

We both stood up and I nodded before reaching into my pocket and pulling out my engagement ring. As I slipped it on, Applejack looked at my ring. “What’s that?” She asked.

I followed her gaze and chuckled. “Oh just my engagement ring… you know, you’re the first one to really notice.” I stated and she gasped.

“Yer… married?” She gasped and I burst into laughter. She raised an eyebrow and watched me with uncertainty.

“Oh hell no… I was just browsing through jewelry one day back on my world and wanted to buy something. I really wanted a bridal ring but my mom forbid me from buying it, even though it was my money. Anyway, I ended up with this stainless steel ring with a synthetic black diamond… cool huh?” I said as I rubbed the ring.

“So yer not actually married?” She asked and I shook my head. “So why’d yah call it an engagement ring?” She asked and I shrugged.

“Because it’s classed as an engagement ring and it’s on my wedding ring finger.” I told her. She scratched her forehead then looked to her left fore-hoof.

“So that finger is like a pony’s wedding ring hoof?” She asked and I shrugged.

“Sure… I guess so…” I was cut off by a clanking sound in the distance followed by some streaking lights. “What the…” I was then cut off by Applejack.

“Oh… not these good fer nothin’s…” She muttered before a train looking thing stopped in front of us. Two male ponies hopped off and began to dance around while singing a rant about fruit and apple juice and profit.

“So whatta yah say stranger?” The one with the moustache asked as he poked me in the ribs with his elbow. I looked down to him with an expressionless look. He gulped as he realized just how big I was compared to him.

“Or uhm… maybe not… hee-hee…” He laughed cautiously.

“Alright yah good fer nothin’s, get gone!” Applejack scowled. As the trio began to argue, I looked in curiosity to their train contraption. The arguing began to interrupt my thoughts.

“Hey…” I muttered rather quietly but they continued to argue. I rolled my eyes. “Hey.” I said louder but still they didn’t hear me. “Hey!” I said sternly, but this time they must’ve ignored me because they kept arguing.

I rolled my eyes with anger. “HEY!” I roared and they all quickly became quiet. I smiled, “This… train thing… what does it run on?” I asked. They all let out a relieved sigh as they realized I wasn’t actually angry.

“Steam or magic powered.” The one without a mustache answered.

“Fucking cock sucker.” I hissed to myself. The two gulped and the mustached one asked me a question.

“Why? Is there… something you need?” He asked rather cautiously, trying his hardest not to anger me.

“Yeah… diesel. More or less, D1 or D2 diesel.” I muttered in defeat.

“Oh… like automotive diesel?!” One asked in excitement. I looked over with a hinting smile creeping across my face.

“You just read my mind.” I stated. Both of them got widening grins across their faces as they looked to each other. Applejack grabbed my shoulder and pulled me down towards her face so she could whisper into my ear.

“Don’t trust these two. They’ll rob yah blind.” Applejack whispered to me. I shrugged, ‘How would these two rob me blind on diesel?’ I thought. I mean, they weren’t the fuel company owners… were they?

The duo began an erratic dance as they sang about all the great things about fossil fuels. I smiled. “I’m in, just let me get my truck.” I told them. Applejack stood to her hindlegs and rested her hoof on my shoulder with a sigh.

“Ah can’t tell yah how tah spend yer money but ah can’t deny yah yer pay either… ‘specially with how hard yah worked.” She said as she handed over a large pouch of what I could only presume to be currency. “There’s a hundred ‘n fifty bits in there… seein as how yah worked three days’ worth a work…” She said in a genuine tone.

I smiled and nodded. “I’ll be comin back tah work tomorrow… if you want.” I said and she snickered. “What?” I asked curiously.

“Yah said ‘tah’… Ah might be makin an impact on yer speech.” She laughed. I nodded as I mounted the duo’s train. “Just don’t let em rob yah blind.” Applejack told me as we began to depart.

* * *

An hour or so passed and it was nearing midnight. The three of us stood at a diesel pump as I pumped fuel into my truck. ‘Sweet gig! Not only did I make a killing at work, I found somepony… ponies, who can get me fuel for my truck!’ I thought to myself. Half a tank of fuel in my truck cost around $30 back on my world so generally speaking, hopefully it would be the same here.

We were in an empty loading yard and a white mist covered the pavement from view. The loading yard looked like it might've been part of some locomotive station or something. A few street lamps were scattered about, somewhat illuminating the area with an orangey shade.

I finished pumping up the truck with diesel and looked to Flim and Flam, or at least that’s what they stated their names were. Flim wrote something down. “So 38 liters of fuel… that’ll be… five hundred bits…” Flim said casually as he did some calculating.

I laughed. “Alright, ha-ha… funny. Seriously though, what do I owe you?” I asked and he looked to me with an unwavering look.

“Five hundred bits…” He stated, almost wondering if he had stuttered earlier. I laughed again but he stated the exact same phrase. My expression became blank.

“You’re fucking with me right?” I asked but then came to a realization. This world was really pristine so perhaps they didn’t like the use of fossil fuels… but that wouldn’t make sense because they used coal powered trains.

“No… you owe us five hundred bits… no more, and not a bit less.” Flam stated firmly.

My expression became blunt. I didn’t have that kind of money. Applejack’s warning played through my head again. These bastards were trying to swindle me. “Alright… quit fucking around… seriously how much do I fucking owe you? And don’t try to fucking rob me.” I stated. The two gulped as my voice deepened.

“Well… uhm… we… we-e-e… uhm… that is to say that… well you-u-u… you see… uhm… what?” They both asked in unison. They looked to each other then back to me. “HE DID IT!” They both cried out, pointing to the other then cowering to the ground, holding their hooves over their heads and weeping loudly.

I looked around with raised eyebrows. ‘Seriously? These guys are supposed to be swindlers yet at the first sign of trouble they start crying.’ I thought to myself. I felt bad for getting harsh like that and felt a hint of guilt.

I grabbed the both of them by the backs of their shirts before lifting them of the ground, one in each hand. I leveled their eyes with mine and spoke calmly. “Listen… you guys are saving my ass by selling me fuel… just name a reasonable price and I’ll pay it. Just don’t bend me over and rape me in the process alright?” I told them. They both nodded and I set them down.

“How does… sixty bits sound?” Flim asked cautiously, as if his actions might result in his death.

“Yeah sure… okay for the record I wasn’t going to hurt you guys.” I told them. They both let out a relieved exhale and wiped sweat from their brows. I opened the passenger side door and reached into the back.

I grabbed the bag of bits off the floor. The bits were resting beside a small suitcase that was labelled ‘Belladonna’. I was going to name her ‘Atropa Belladonna’ but that was just too long.

I closed the door behind me and handed the duo sixty bits. “Alright… hey listen, you two just saved my ass… I don’t know what I would’ve done if you guys hadn’t shown me that there was diesel in this world. I know that I paid you, but I feel that I kinda owe you guys. If you ever need help just give me a ring… just don’t have me swindle ponies or anything.” I told them. They nodded as I began proceeding to the driver side door.

I looked back to the duo and thought to myself. “Hey guys…” I called out and they stopped for a moment. I heard them gulp before slowly turning to look at me. “Does this mean we’re friends?” I asked. They looked to each other, then back to me and nodded. A lingering smile crept across my face as I pulled out a pen and paper.

‘Dear Princess Sparkles,

Today I learnted that I should listen to others more often because sometimes they know more about something than I do, even if I want to believe that I know more. But sometimes, not listening to that pony leads to a situation that eventually blossoms into a very important friendship.

Your unconditional student,

Burdy’

Author's Note

When I say to someone my age (I'm 18) "I pre-ordered GTA V" and they reply with "Oh yeah, my mom pre-ordered it for me" I just look at them like

Chapter 5

‘You asked me to get outside!
I went outside, what happens after that is beyond my control…’

Friday, March 15th 2014…

So, to put it into a nutshell; I made two friends, three if you count Applejack, but she’s more of a boss figure to me. Yesterday I didn't need to work because Applejack was waiting on the next shipment of saplings, which was supposed to arrive late Saturday.

I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror. Though back on earth I wasn’t necessarily considered ‘massive’ I was still big. Now I was a mountain, but I wouldn’t let it go to my head. I looked closer to the mirror, closer to the reflection of myself.

“Hot damn Burdy… If Scotty could see you now, he’d probably shit a brick,” I muttered to myself as I flexed. Veins bulged underneath my skin as my muscles all expanded. I looked to my reflection’s chest, then to my own. “I always wondered what boobs felt like…” I chuckled faintly as I grasped a handful of my own chest.

“Mmm… firm and perky,” I laughed before shaking my head in disappointment. I let out a sigh and thought about my world and how much I missed it. My family, my dog, my job, my boss… meat and guns.

As I kept quiet, my senses picked up the trace of something behind me. I spun around to see nothing in particular. I pulled open the door to the washroom, only to see Twilight standing there.

She gasped in embarrassment as I stood before her. “I-I-I… I uhm… was just waiting for… for the bathroom,” she stammered. I blinked cluelessly, then looked back to the bathroom.

“Well, I’m done. Sorry I was just… uhm…” I tried to think up a rather thoughtful excuse other than ‘I was admiring myself in the mirror.’

“I was just brushing up,” I told her before grabbing my shirt off the bathroom counter. I gulped before letting out a nervous laugh. “Sorry for taking so long…” I muttered. She stood to her hindlegs and we tried to move past each other, like a pair of klutzes.

I hadn’t had a lot of practice with my new body size and didn’t calculate my body mass. I ended up accidentally brushing my bare chest against hers as we continued to move past each other.

“Ah… sorry… I’m a… a bit of a klutz…” I laughed hesitantly. She blushed as she stopped and rested her fore hooves at my waist. Her cheeks became a cherry red shade as she looked into my eyes with her own, her pupils seeming to sparkle in the dim light produced by the bathroom light bulbs.

“Evan…” she whispered. I nodded with a look of dumbfounded expression on my face. “I… I… thank you.” She quickly slipped past me and into the washroom before closing the door behind her.

I scratched my head and wondered what all that was about. ‘Why the hell did she stand to her hindlegs like that and try to squeeze past me? Why didn’t she just wait till I was out?’ I thought to myself before looking to my watch.

‘It’s 2:30am, so why the hell is she up? Maybe she needed the washroom really bad.’ I thought then nodded with an assuring thought, ‘That must’ve been what she needed. Why else would she have acted so strangely?’

I slowly swayed myself down to the basement, or I suppose it had turned into my room. There was a bed in the far north corner, but I constantly moved it whenever I felt like it. Then there was a small squarish TV with 'bunny ears' and radio in the middle, along with workout equipment scattered about that I had gotten Twilight to pick up. I used the excuse that ‘I need these things to study friendship.’ It was a total lie, but an effective one nonetheless.

I felt a hint of guilt hit me for the first time about lying to her. I didn’t have nearly enough money to pay her back right now. I put it on my mental ‘to do list’ to pay her back.

I flopped down on my bed, exhaustion quickly overcoming any of my other senses. I guess staying up until now without any rest was kind of a bad idea. My eyes quickly shut and I couldn’t manage to open them again. Soon darkness surrounded my entire world, and I fell into deep sleep.

* * *

Evan Eldner and my brother sat atop the porch as they watched me load each shell, one by one, into the SKS rifle. My brother piped up. “I don’t know man. I hit three targets in under ten seconds, and that rifle isn’t all that accurate. Maybe we should just save the ammo and say that I won. Besides, we all know that I’m a better shot than you,” he boasted.

Evan Eldner snickered. “Dude, that’s ‘Evan’s’ gun. And besides, you always say you’re better, but you never prove it.” Evan countered back. They began a small bickerment about accuracy and my gun. I racked back the bolt and released it, letting it slam forward.

“Ahem! Gentlemen, let me show you how it’s done,” I said competitively. My brother let out a ‘Pfft’ and rolled his eyes. Evan leaned back with a look of certainty in knowing that I’d probably best my brother.

Evan tapped my brother’s shoulder. “Five bucks says he hits all five in less than ten seconds,” Evan challenged. My brother quickly leaned over and shook his hand, each of them pulling out a five dollar bill.

I stood with my right foot behind me and my left foot in front. I took a deep breath then let out a slow exhale. As I let myself become loose, I lifted the rifle barrel up, leveling my sights with the empty fruit cans about 30 yards away. I pulled the stock tightly against my shoulder and let my hands gently caress my rifle. “No way man, there’s no way he’ll beat me. Even Layton said I was a crack shot,” my brother boasted.

My vision sharpened as I trained the rifle’s crude sights on the can furthest to the right. ‘Alright Burdy… steady as she goes,’ I thought to myself. My finger rested on the smooth trigger. ‘Smooth…’ I thought. ‘This is my rifle, my rifle. Without it I am nothing, without me, my rifle is nothing… Smooth.’

BOOM!

The rifle shot echoed, but the can didn’t move. I quickly set my sights to the next can, and the first shot was echoed by a second.

BOOM!

Again the can didn’t move. My line of sight was switched to the third, followed by a gunshot. Almost as if natural instinct, my hands guided the rifle’s aim to the fourth and, again, the rifle boomed and the target didn’t budge.

My sights fell to the final target and my finger squeezed back. The rifle shot echoed in the distance as the fruit can bounced along the ground. The bolt and firing block locked back, signaling that she was empty.

My brother fist pumped the air. “AHHH YEAH! Told yah I was a better shot!” He cheered as he yanked the money from Evan’s hand. He went to boast more, but I brought my hand up as if to tell him ‘Shut up’.

“Let’s go check the cans,” I told him. He rolled his eyes and sighed.

“What’s the point? You only hit one, the others didn’t even budge,” my brother sneered. I began walking down the steps of the porch, Evan following me and my brother eventually following suit.

We paced over to the cans, only to see a fine entry and exit hole in each can, the exit hole being the exact same size as the entry. My brother’s jaw hung open as he gawked in disbelief. “I think that settles it.” I smirked faintly, just as Evan lightly slapped my brother upside the head.

“Oww!” My brother hissed just before Evan snatched the money out of his hand. “HEY!” Vaughn, my brother, yelled.

“Hey yourself. I won the bet. Evan hit all five cans, in what? Six seconds?” Evan asked. My brother crossed his arms begrudgingly, as he knew that not only had he lost the bet, but it was now official. I was a better shot than him... not that there was any doubt.

Evan laughed. “How on earth did you ever think you were better than your brother? Everyone knows that Burdy is a good shot with ‘his’ rifle,” he laughed, putting emphasis on the fact Applebloom was my rifle.

I slung the rifle across my back and stretched as I laughed. “I don’t know… but I know that my brother doesn’t know what full metal jacket rounds do to cans,” I laughed. My brother had a sour look on his face. “Aww come on Vaughn… did you forget that piercing rounds just go right through cans without making them wobble?” I laughed playfully.

He frowned. “Shut up,” he muttered, and we all started laughing. Suddenly my laughing stopped as I felt my world start to blur. I felt a pulling at my leg and my vision blurred further. I brought my hands to my head as the world seemed to black out.

* * *

I awoke abruptly, sitting straight up with a look of shock on my face. I was breathing heavily and erratically, looking around to find out what was going on, only to find Spike shaking my leg.

A deep breath left my mouth as I flopped back down on my bed, semi relieved that nothing was wrong. “Morning Spike,” I whispered.

“Wow… that’s the first time I’ve been up before you,” he stated. I looked to my watch and, to my shock, it was 10:58am.

“Holy shit,” I nearly gasped out the words in utter disbelief.

“Language.” I heard a voice scold me. I looked past Spike to see Twilight trotting down the stairs with a plate of scrambled eggs levitated in front of her. She trotted up to me and set it down next to me.

“Thanks,” I nodded to Spike.

“Actually… Twilight made it this morning,” Spike informed me. Usually Spike made breakfast because… well, just because he did. I looked to Twilight and nodded before shrugging.

“Thanks Twilight… it smells good,” I thanked her as I took a deep inhalation of the aroma coming from the eggs.

“You’re welcome,” she replied with a genuine smile on her face. I looked over to the eggs with a smile and remembered last night’s thoughts I had. I sighed and looked back to Twilight.

“Twilight… I’m sorry. I lied to you. I don’t need this workout equipment to learn about friendship. I swear I’ll pay you back, how much was it?” I inquired. She sat beside me and rested her hoof on my shoulder.

“It’s okay. Besides, this way you’re keeping in shape rather than lazing around all day in the basement. I feel better knowing that you’re keeping yourself in a fit, healthy condition,” she told me. My guilt seemed to be lifted with me knowing that I told her.

I reached over to the plate and began scoffing back the eggs and, within a minute, I was done. Twilight giggled and I looked to her while licking away a bit of egg from my face. “Did you even taste it?” She laughed and I nodded.

“Yeah… it was really good. Sorry Spike but Twilight might just be first prize winner,” I said and Twilight smiled. I smirked back. “So…” I began and she looked to me.

“So?” She asked and I chuckled.

“So aren’t you going to bug me to go out and learn about ‘the magic of friendship?’” I asked sarcastically.

“I didn’t know you were taking a liking to it,” she replied with a tone of hopefulness. I shrugged.

“Perhaps,” I stated without any incriminating evidence of my true intentions. I briefly remembered my dream and realized it had been several months since I had even held a gun, let alone shot one.

A bright smile lit up across her face. “That’s great! Oh Evan, I’m so happy that you want to learn about friendship,” she said excitedly. I didn’t plan on lying to her, so I’d probably just meet up with somepony, like maybe Derpy, and talk, then say I learned about friendship before I went out and practiced with my guns.

I stood up and grabbed my plate. Twilight snatched it out of my right hand with her magic and gave me a smile. “Don’t worry, I’ll get this. Now go out there and learn about friendship!” She said happily as she trotted away with almost a hop in her trot.

‘Who the hell says shit like that? Go out there and learn about friendship,’ I thought to myself as I began making my way out of the house. As I reached the stairs, I grabbed my camouflaged jacket off the staircase railing and slipped it on, leaving the sleeves rolled up.

As I continued towards the front door of the house, Spike tugged at my pant leg. I looked down to him and he spoke. “Are you really going to go out there and learn about friendship?” He asked, already partially knowing that wasn’t my full intentions.

I shook my head. “Nah. I’m gonna go try to get some range practice in with my guns,” I told him. I had told him a while ago what guns were, but he didn’t think they were all that great. In fact, he thought they were pretty scary, since they could kill things.

“Oh… okay… if you’re back early, can we go to Sugarcube Corner?” He asked. I nodded and he hugged my leg happily. “THANKS EVAN! You’re the best,” he stated. I reached into my pocket and tossed him ten bits.

“Here, take this. If I’m not back in time, just go without me,” I told him. He smiled as I turned and made my way outside and to the vehicle shelter.

I heard a faint whistling sound, followed by a scream. I looked up to the sky to see what I thought was Derpy careening towards the ground. “HELP!” I heard a dopey voice cry. ‘Eeyup… it’s Derpy.’ I thought, almost with a sigh. My mind remembered how much it hurt the first time she crashed into me.

I lined myself up in her path and held out my arms, ready to catch her. I winced just before she collided with me, sure that the collision was going to be painful. Instead, I felt a mediocre pain in my chest, followed by the feeling of my feet skidding backwards along the ground.

I tensed and forced my body into a stop. ‘That went better than expected…’ I thought as I realized I was still standing. I felt the shivering, grey pegasus in my arms, her hooves still covering her face in fear.

“Morning Derpy,” I greeted her bluntly, as if nothing had happened. Her hooves came away from her face and she looked up to me with her funny, criss crossed eyes. She looked over the sides of my arms to see that I had sort of rescued her.

“You saved me! You’re a HERO!” She yelled out loud, though nopony took notice. She gave me a hug and squeezed tightly. “Oh thank you, thank you, thankyouthankyouthankyouthank…” I cut her off when I set her down.

“Yeah uhm… don’t worry about it,” I chuckled before proceeding to the back of my truck. I heard Derpy’s hoof steps following me. I popped open the toolbox on the driver side of the truck box.

“Whatcha doin?” She asked as I pulled out a black case labelled ‘Applebloom.’ I quickly opened the case, revealing my SKS rifle, and slung it across my back. “Ooh… what’s that?” Derpy asked curiously.

“A rifle.” I didn’t go into detail, as I figured she’d probably have no clue what I was talking about. “A magnificent piece of technology,” I told her as I set the empty case back in the toolbox, then closed it. The sky looked clear, and for all I knew, it would probably stay that way for the rest of the day. I walked around to the other side of the truck.

She observed the rifle curiously as I popped open the second toolbox and reached into a big military surplus crate that was filled right to the guts with 7.62x39mm military surplus shells. Ten round stripper clips held some of the bullets, ready for speed loading a rifle.

I grabbed several stripper clips and slipped them into the pockets of my jacket and pants. As I loaded myself up, I remembered how long it took me to load all these stripper clips. When I had bought the box, inside were two metal crates with soldered tops. Inside each smaller crate were dozens upon dozens of small paper boxes, each holding twenty rounds of ammunition. Back then I had figured it would be a good idea to load them into stripper clips. When I did start loading them, I was pretty pissed to say the least, it felt like it took forever to do it…

“What’s those?” Derpy asked, interrupting my thoughts. I looked to her, then to the bullets I was loading.

“Oh… just ammo. Hey, you wanna come shoot guns with me?” I asked. She stood there with a blank expression on her face. I gave her a friendly nudge to the shoulder with my elbow. “Come on, it’ll be fun,” I said.

Still she had a blank look on her face. I closed the toolbox and started to walk away. Looking back, I saw that Derpy had her head tilted to one side as she looked to me curiously. “You coming?” I asked.

Her wings fluffed out and she began to hover above the ground, following me out of town. “So Derpy…” I began, looking beside me, only to see her looking back to me. “What’s new with you?” I asked.

“Oh, not much… just my job I guess. I never do anything cool like you,” she said. I chuckled from the comment.

“I hardly do anything cool,” I told her and her mouth opened wide as though she was going to gasp. “Oh come on, you don’t have to act. I’m not all that interesting if you get past the fact that I’m from another world,” I stated. She nodded rapidly and I rolled my eyes. “Name one thing that I’ve done that was interesting today,” I countered.

“You saved my life,” she countered back. I face palmed. That was hardly saving her life.

“Come on Derpy. I didn’t really save your life…” I trailed off and figured she’d probably argue for as long as we lived that I had just saved her life. “Okay, other than that?” I asked. She thought to herself and I watched her as I smirked. “See, told yah so. I’m not all that interesting,” I told her.

She smiled back at me. “Sure you are. You walked into a tree without noticing it was there,” she replied. I opened my mouth to ask when that happened but before a single syllable exited my mouth, my path was blocked by a tree that I bumped into.

My balance was impaired and I stumbled about before falling face first into the ground with a thump. I slowly stood up with a sigh. “Okay Derpy… you got me. But I’m still not interes…” I trailed off, realizing that the pegasus wasn’t beside me any longer. “Derpy?” I asked, looking around for the cross eyed pegasus.

I turned in a complete 180 before spotting her, looking down a canyon-like formation. I walked over beside her and followed her fascination of the gorge. “Ghastly Gorge…” She whispered.

“Cool… I’ve always wanted to go into a canyon, err gorge,” I said as I went to traverse down the side. She grabbed my shoulder and stopped me, yanking me back.

“Wait! It’s not safe down there! There’s Timberwolves and eels and…” She trailed off with a frightened look on her face. She looked both ways before bringing her lips to my ear and whispering, “Peg-leg the pirate.”

* * *

Narrated by Derpy Hooves:

‘A long time ago, in the heartland of Equestria, there was a pirate. A fearsome pirate named Legs, because he could outrun anypony in Equestria, even pegasus royal guards!’

A floating pirate ship hovered up alongside a royal merchant ship that was cruising atop the waves of the ocean.

‘He was feared among all who sailed the seas. It’s said that not even Canterlot battleship brigades were safe from his piracy.’

Guards in the merchant ship took their posts, but no sooner had they done so, a massive cannon ball erupted against the deck, splintering wood shrapnel everywhere, wounding several ponies in the process.

'Merchant ships were warned of his piracy, and few embarked without heavy protection. Even with the protection of royal guards, Legs and his crew managed to rob countless ships for their cargo.’

Ropes flung down from the floating ship and pirates slid down, embarking the ship, and fighting against the guards of the ship. Most of the pirates used cutlass swords while the guards used longswords. In only a matter of minutes, the pirates outnumbered the guards and simply swarmed them. In a mere five minutes, the merchant ship had been overrun.

‘It was said that Legs himself fought on every raid, and he himself killed the captain of the opposing ship. However, if any of his crew killed the captain of a ship, he’d kill that pirate himself.’

The hovering ship lowered beside the captured merchant ship. A lone, dark brown stallion hopped across the two ships. He was dressed in pirate rags and had a deathly cutie mark of a skull and crossbones. Over top his regular drab of rags was a fine long coat that dangled low, just inches about the ground.

Some fellow pirates dragged over the captain of the merchant ship and presented him to the shanty pirate, who looked down upon the captain with a snide look on his face.

The two pirates holding the captain released him and Legs walked to the captain’s side as he drew out his Cutlass sabre. Legs lined up his swing, but just as he cocked back, the captain whipped out a small sword from his saddle sheath and swung it low at the shanty pirate captain.

The sharp blade sliced Legs’ right hoof clean off. The pirate captain shrieked in pain as he fell off balance and crashed to the ground. The two pirates that were restraining the captain prior stabbed their blades through the captain’s abdomen, killing him instantly.

‘They say that when Legs’ hoof was cut off, he gained an entirely different persona. He no longer responded to Legs, not even remembering the name at all. Some say his entire mentality changed.’

Legs stood up and looked at the stump where his hoof used to be, blood spurting out of the wound. He looked down to the now dead captain, then to the captain's sword. Legs picked up the sword and admired it briefly. Then, in a display of grotesque and horrifying gruesomeness, he lodged the hilt right into his stumped limb.

‘They say the moment the hilt of the deceased captain’s sword entered his foreleg, it was the moment that marked the death of Legs… and the birth of Peg-leg.’

A few of the other pirates held their hooves over their mouths, keeping their lunch down. Peg-leg lifted his right foreleg into the air, letting his bloody knife-hoof gleam in the sunlight.

He slowly brought it back down and looked at his reflection in the bloody, shimmering blade. The pirates all watched him fearfully as he looked to the two pirates who had killed the merchant captain. In a brief flash, he charged forwards and gave one slash of his new knife-hoof.

Everything seemed to sit still. The first pirate went to speak, but ended up gurgling as blood began to pour from the gash in his throat. The second pirate joined suit, and both fell to the ground.

‘He became so viscous that the royal guard issued an Equestria wide hunt…’

Years later…

The hover ship flew along at a rather fast pace. Hundreds of royal guard carriages followed behind, all firing small cannons at the ship. Peg-leg, now aged and scarred, pointed his knife-hoof towards the swarm off carriages and let out a war-cry.

Several of the cannons on the pirate ship fired, the cannon balls exploding mid-flight and destroying many of the pursuing carriages.

‘Ponies say that the royal guard outnumbered Peg-leg and his crew by one thousand ships when they finally took him down.’

The cannons of the flying carriages all fired. The propulsion system of the flying pirate ship erupted and the ship began to crash down. One of Peg-leg’s crew members tried to rush him to tiny escape boat. Peg-leg simply impaled the pirate and faced his fate. The mortally wounded pirate fell beside his captain, grasping his stomach as he fell.

‘As anypony knows, the captain always goes down with his ship. His pirate cruiser crashed and kept sliding across the ground, creating a devastatingly large gash in the ground.’

The ship finally came to a stop and the royal guards swarmed it, swords and spears ready as they began taking apart the ship, looking for survivors to take prisoner.

‘And they say… Peg-legs’ body was never found. The royal guard stated that his body was probably destroyed in the crash but… every now and then, a merchant ship would mysteriously disappear if it passed nearby the gravesite of Peg-legs’ ship. Soon it became forever known as… GHASTLY GORGE!’

* * *

Derpy made spooky noises as she waved her forelegs in the air. I mouthed my tongue around and nodded. “Indeed… well, let’s go check it out. You never know… maybe we’ll find Peg-legs’ treasure!” I laughed, but just as I began to proceed down into the crevice of the gorge, Derpy grabbed my shoulder.

I turned back to her, only to see her hovering there with a look of freight on her face. “Evan… I don’t know… it’s scary down there,” she said, almost in tears. I waved my hand in carelessness.

“Bah, nothing will happen. You worry too much. And besides, if anything ‘does’ happen, I’ll protect you,” I assured her. She gulped, then let out a deep breath.

“Promise?” She asked. I nodded and then tried to proceed down the crevice, but once again she grabbed me. “Tail twist swear?” She asked and I raised an eyebrow.

“Uhm Derpy… I don’t have a tail…” I informed her. She rubbed her chin, then clapped as she thought of an idea. She turned me around and went back to back with me.

“Tail twist swear?” She asked.

“Yeah, uhh... sure, Tail twist swear,” I replied, not exactly sure what she had in mind. She gave my rump a little bump with hers, but due to the way I was standing on the crevice edge, I quickly lost balance and crashed down to the gorge’s bottom.

I heard Derpy gasp from above and she quickly flew down to my side. “Evan! Oh my gosh! I’m sooo sorry. I didn’t mean to…” She began, but I brought my hand up to her mouth.

“It’s cool. Now let’s go exploring!” I said with excitement in my voice. I hadn’t gotten to go on this kind of adventure since the time I broke into an abandoned hotel up in the middle of nowhere.

I unslung my rifle and checked to make sure I hadn’t scratched the stock on my fall. Luckily, due to me just sliding down on my chest, my rifle stock was still in beautiful condition.

I racked back the bolt and stuffed a stripper clip into the receiver tab before pushing down on the top shell with my thumb, loading ten rounds into the gun. I pulled out the empty stripper clip and slid it into my back pocket.

As I chambered the first round, the clank of the bolt and firing block slamming shut echoed in the gorge. I held the barrel on a lowered, forty five degree angle as we walked along on the base of the gorge floor.

Every so often, the sound of some animal or creature would echo and I’d hear Derpy squeak in fear, then I’d have to assure her that everything was fine. Even so, she'd cling close to me as we went along. We kept going through brief, dark passageways and crevices. Every time something squeaked, she’d squeeze harder and harder. Eventually she was just like a backpack, wrapped snuggly to my body.

As we entered a larger clearing in the gorge, we stopped and took a breather. Derpy’s breathing was much sharper and scared. Mine was calm and I had a smile across my face.

“Derpy,” I called to her and she looked to me fearfully. “I’m sorry for dragging you down here. If you want to leave you can. I would never hold it against you,” I apologized, but rather than fly away, she let go of my back and stepped in front of me.

“I can’t,” she replied, and I was taken aback by the comment.

“Sure you can. All you gotta do is fly straight up and…” My statement was cut off when she stood to her hindlegs and rested her hoof on my mouth.

“You’re protecting me… so I have to protect you. A friend will always watch another friend's back, no matter what!” She told me. A mimicking smile crept across both our faces. Suddenly, a scream echoed in the gorge and Derpy leapt at me and clung to my body, shaking in fear.

Another, more pained, scream echoed again. “Derpy, we gotta…” I was cut off by another scream, again a painful one. Derpy’s grip around me tightened and, rather than tell my companion that we had to save whoever was screaming I simply began rushing towards the origin of the screams.

Each scream would result in Derpy squeezing tighter and tighter, every scream sounded closer and closer until, all of a sudden, they just stopped. I stopped in my tracks and listened closely.

The thumping of my heartbeat echoed in my ears, making it hard to hear. “Hello! Anypony there!?” I yelled and, to my surprise, I got my reply quicker than I thought I would.

“Over here! Help!” The voice called back. I rushed in the voice’s direction. In moments I entered a rather narrow passage and saw a cyan pony with a matching rainbow streaked mane and tail.

“OH YEAH! I’m saved! Hey hurry up and get me free! Tank is at Fluttershy’s, so I got nopony to help me out but you guys,” she stated, but it sounded more like she was ordering me to let her free.

I stepped forwards, Derpy still clinging to my chest. As I got closer, it came to my realization that the rainbow pony turned out to be a pegasus, and she just so happened to have her left wing caught under a rather large rock.

I tried to pry Derpy free from my chest, but to no avail. I’d just have to do this with her clinging to me the way she was. The rainbow pegasus leaned over and took a look at Derpy. “De… Derpy?” She asked, and Derpy took her face away from my chest.

Suddenly she lept off and waved to the pegasus still trapped by the large rock, which probably weighed an excess of four hundred pounds. I slung my rifle across my back and tried to heft it up, but due to its shape, it was nearly impossible to get off her wing.

“Well shit… how do I…” I began, but was cut off by the deathly howl of a wolf that sounded as if it was way too close for comfort. I spun around and unslung my rifle. Derpy jumped and clung to my back, shaking fearfully as the sight of luminescent green eyes approached through the dark tunnels of the crevice.

“GET ME OUTTA HERE!” The rainbow coloured mare shrieked. The eyes of what I feared to be Timberwolves stayed at bay, for the moment. I quickly spun and looked at the rock. It was jammed up against the side of the gorge wall. The only way to get it off her wing was lifting it straight up… or right over top of her body. Of course the latter was not an option for obvious reasons.

With the shape of the rock, I couldn’t grasp it to lift it. ‘If only there were some handles…’ I thought, then snapped loudly as I thought of a plan. I lined up my rifle sights with the rock and fired four rapid shots into the rock’s side. Each shot took a chunk out of the stone, making a deepening crater hole in the rock that still trapped the pegasus.

I looked around for something to stick in the hole. I wasn’t exactly keen on trying to use my rifle to try and lift it, especially if it was our only defense against the Timberwolves. The eyes that gleamed from the shadows faded briefly, but then quickly returned, though now with more eyes appearing than before.

There was nothing down here that I could use as a lever. The only chance I had was…

“Derpy… Derpy… DERPY!” I yelled while trying to get the grey mare off my back. She wouldn’t budge willingly. I grabbed a tuft of her neck skin and reefed her off my back before pinning her body in between the rock and my body.

“Derpy listen, I need you to go up there and get a big, sturdy stick…” I trailed off as I realized she was locked up from fear. “Derpy! I need a goddamn stick!” I yelled ,but still nothing. The wolves began to move in for the kill.

The cyan mare became frantic and was shrieking in absolute fear. I pointed to her. “You! Shut your mouth…” I turned back to Derpy who was still frozen with fear. “Derpy… I need you… I need you to save me. Do you have my back?” I asked. Her eyes flickered and she gasped.

“Wh… What?” She asked and I slapped my forehead with my left palm.

“Derpy, you need to protect me. I need a stick, a big one. You scratch my back and I scratch yours… right?” I asked. Without warning, her wings sprang out and she shot directly up and out of the gorge.

‘God’s speed.’ I thought to myself. “HEY WHAT ABOUT US!?” The rainbow coloured mare screamed. I rolled my eyes.

“Holy carny,” I muttered as I turned to face the Timberwolves that now approached in the wide open. There were probably five of them in the open, plus over a two dozen more in the darkness.

The Russian March theme from Red Alert 3 began to play in my head for some reason as I readied my rifle. The first wolf sprang out at me and, as if by instinct, I pulled the trigger on my rifle even before I had properly targeted it.

A bullet splintered a fine hole into the creature's forehead and it fell to the ground in a lifeless heap. Two more wolves charged and two more gunshots echoed in the gorge, followed by the thumping of the wolves’s bodies hitting the ground.

The final two charged at me with fury in their eyes. My rifle swung over towards them as my eyes squinted to get a bead on them. I fired at the closest wolf before pivoting my aim to the last remaining beast. Firing the last two rounds in the magazine, the bolt locked open and empty shell casings lay scattered across the ground. As I tilted the gun to load a fresh stripper clip of ammo, I flipped out the bayonet, letting it gleam in the sunlight.

In a flash of motion, a fresh stripper clip was out and loaded into the rifle. I used my left hand to place the spent stripper clip in my hind pocket. I moved my left hand to the foregrip of the rifle, then used my right to rack the receiver.

“Alright you sons a’ bitches… let’s rumble,” I called out. The theme tunes playing inside my head intensified, and a stronger chorus began playing. Five more wolves charged out.

The wolves charged me like rabid dogs. I took three aimed shots as fast as I could, the rifle shaking in my grip, but the fourth wolf closed the gap between our bodies faster than I could get a bead on his head. I stabbed the bayonet tip forwards as it leapt through the air, impaling its body on the weapon’s gleaming blade.

I swung the rifle in a counter clockwise arc, the body of the wolf sliding off and skittering away. Before I could readjust my aim, the fifth wolf was upon me. Unable to line up a shot, or even stab it with the bayonet, I simply swung the butt of the rifle stock forwards, bashing it in the jaw. The wolf fell back and allowed me the brief time I needed to readjust the gun and line up a headshot.

The rifle shot echoed like a crack of thunder, the gun jerking against my shoulder beautifully. The 7.62x39mm FMJ bullet tumbled after it entered the wolf’s head, blowing out a chunk of wood debris as it left the wooden wolf's skull. Derpy landed behind me.

“EVAN!” She yelled frantically. I turned and slung my rifle. She tossed me a thick tree branch, probably ten inches in diameter. The end looked like it would fit in the crater I had made. As quickly as I could manage, I slammed the stick into the hole then began to use it as a lift handle.

I began to grunt in effort as I lifted the rock off the ground. “Come on, come on, comeoncomeon!” I grunted in painful effort as I hefted up the large rock. It barely lifted off the ground but it was enough room for the pegasus to slip out. The cyan mare didn't need a second chance and slid her wing out from underneath.

“LET’S GET OUTTA…” She winced in pain as her left wing cringed, obviously being injured from the weight of the rock pinning it down. I quickly spun and unslung my rifle, directing my aim to the wolves that were still lingering at bay.

“Derpy, get that mare outta here,” I ordered. Derpy gave me a brief salute.

“HEY! I have a name and it’s Rainbow Da…” She began, but I cut her off just as I fired a round into an approaching Timberwolf.

“Oh just shut up already!” I yelled. Derpy took off with Rainbow in her hooves. I leveled my rifle at my hip and blasted off the remaining shots aimlessly into the darkness before turning and running deeper into the gorge.

I heard the howls of the Timberwolves as they chased after me. I stuffed the SKS with another fresh stripper clip. I angled my body and fired wildly at my pursuers. Due to running, pointing behind me and firing from the hip; out of the ten rounds, I only managed to stop one of my pursuers with a leg shot that tore off it’s leg from the knee joint.

‘Lucky shot!’ I thought as I turned to face any oncoming obstacles. The theme still playing in my head hit an absolute maximum chorus, almost making it impossible to hear.

A moment later I had a full magazine loaded with a round in the chamber. Rather than turn and shoot wildly, I kept running. The darkness of a cavern hindered my sight, but only briefly as I quickly came out on the other side, only to realize that it was a dead end.

I turned to see at least two dozen Timberwolves quarreling around me like rabid animals. The theme in my head continued to blare and hinder some of my hearing.

I took a deep breath. ‘How am I going to play this?’ I thought to myself. Maybe, if I had an extended thirty round detachable magazine, then I’d have a good chance. I lifted up my left leg and reached to an ankle sheath.

“It’s been a while since I used you…” I muttered as I grasped the Buck knife in my hand, the blade tip pointing downwards. I rested the rifle foregrip on my left forearm while still holding the knife in my left, blade now pointing towards the wolves. "Let's play some Call of Duty..." I muttered to myself.

“Russia knew… when your gun was out of ammo, it could always be used as a pointy stick,” I hissed at the wolves. Balancing the gun, I used my right hand to pick out a fresh stripper clip.

I squeezed the stripper clip in my right palm as I gripped the rifle fiercely. This was probably a stupidly impractical idea, but it was all I could come up with at the moment.

I exhaled through my nose before taking in a breath of fresh air, knowing it could be my last. The wolves all moved on me, spreading apart and trying to further corner me into the dead end. My sights readied almost naturally and, without my needing to tell myself, my trigger finger was already going to work.

Three consecutive gunshots went off in a short, unison, semi-automatic burst. Three wolves fell and six charged at me. Three more shots echoed, followed by the falling of three more wolves.

I managed two more shots before the wolves closed the gap and made it hard to line up kill shots. One leapt and I used a similar technique to the one that I had used before, impaling the first wolf, then swinging it’s body to the side before finally slamming the butt stock into the snout of the next wolf, sending it staggering back.

I lined up a shot and fired, incapacitating the wolf, but completely depleting my magazine. Holding both my knife and gun in my left hand, I used my right to feed a fresh ten shots to my rifle.

However, just as I racked on the bolt handle, a Timberwolf tackled me to the ground. Applebloom slipped from my grip and tumbled out of reach. My left arm slid between our bodies and I stabbed the wolf in the neck several times with my Buck knife. "GAHHH, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU!" I swore as I continued stabbing it's neck, the beast somehow still able to snap and nip at me.

After moments of stabbing, it howled in pain and I quickly pushed it off, only to find another already snapping at my face from my right side. I tried slamming the side of my fist into it’s snout, but instead of a successful blow, the wolf ended up grabbing hold of my forearm and chomping down tightly.

I let out a howl of pain before slamming the blade right through the top of it’s skull and, without further movement, it simply collapsed. Before I could fully stand and get the wolf off my arm, the wolf I had stabbed in the neck just moments ago began snapping at me again. 'Right, they have no blood...' I thought to myself. I twisted my wrist and stabbed at it's head, impaling it's skull and rendered it incapacitated "Even if it doesn't bleed, we can kill it." I muttered in a Schwarzenegger voice. I managed to stand but another wolf latched to my back and began snapping at my neck.

I struggled to get it off, but to no avail. With my bulky muscles, I could no longer reach my back with ease. “FUCK!” I roared as I stood up to my full height. Just as I managed to stand another wolf jumped and latched to my left leg, gnawing and chewing into the thick of my thigh. I charged backwards and into the stone wall of the gorge, shattering apart the wolf’s body that was latched to my back.

In one furious swipe, I stabbed the Buck knife blade into the wolf attached to my leg. The blade sliced right into it’s wooden skull and it fell lifelessly to my feet.

Two more charged at me, vicious jaws snapping and drool leaking about freely. I charged in the direction of the one on my right and, at the last possible second, leapt further to my right while stabbing my knife at the wolf’s face.

The blade connected with it’s temple, but became lodged in it’s head and was torn from my grip. I rolled across the ground, just as the second wolf leapt through the air. I placed the base of my feet in the flight of his path and gave him a powerful kick that shattered his body apart.

I crawled backwards along the ground until I was in reach of my rifle. Another wolf leapt through the air and I separated our bodies with my bayonet tipped rifle. The wolf’s abdomen was impaled by the blade and I used my right foot to boot it off.

I rolled over to my belly and quickly pushed myself up, albeit painfully. Blood was dampening my clothing and oozing down my face. I turned just as a wolf charged me from behind, its face becoming like a barrel ornament as its skull was pierced by the blade that was attached to the end of my rifle.

I kicked the body off my gun just in time to jump and deliver a roundhouse kick to a charging wolf. However, as I landed, my injured left leg seared in pain, forcing me to cringe and fall to my knees.

I spotted two more wolves charging me head-on. Two gunshots filled the air and their bodies thumped to the ground. I turned ninety degrees to my left and fired four more rounds, followed by the deaths of four more wolves.

I spun in a clockwise one eighty and managed three more shots, but the fourth wolf in the group managed to leap at me. I stabbed it through the neck with the bayonet, but the momentum knocked me to my back.

With my back to the ground, and the only thing between my juicy neck and the jaws of a hungry Timberwolf being my gun, one could say I was in a ‘tight’ situation. The wolf thrashed about, and tried furiously to close the small gap between us.

“Sorry pooch… not supper!” I muttered before pulling the trigger on my rifle. The final gunshot echoed, and a hole was placed at the bottom of its jaw. As the lifeless body atop of me went limp, I cringed and pushed it off of my gun.

My entire body burned in pain, but it was alright. I did it… “I FUCKING DID IT!” I yelled out painfully, for all the world to hear. "I fucking did it." I muttered quietly. I looked over to my Buck knife, still lodged in a wolf’s temple. As I walked over to retrieve my knife, I slipped ten fresh rounds into my rifle before slinging the rifle across my back. With a sigh I wiped my face, trying to clean away the blood that bled profusely from several cuts in my face.

“Well… I guess I got my practice,” I mused to myself as I pulled the knife out of the wolf’s skull. I examined both it and my gun. My knife was fine, and so was my rifle, though my rifle would need to have the stock refurbished. Though by who was beyond me. I suppose I could do it, reckoning I had the time.

A clattering sound filled the air, almost like bones were dancing. I turned, only to see every single piece of Timberwolf forming into one big, ugly wolf. “Oh shit… talk about Wolfenstein,” I muttered in a Schwarzenegger tone.

The wolf took one step and it felt like an earthquake. It took another step and I realized I wasn’t going to just shoot it in the head or impale it then expect this thing to die. ‘Think Burdy… THINK!’ I thought to myself. Part of the gorge wall crumbled away and my thoughts started connecting.

I charged forwards, zigzagging and crisscrossing to make it difficult for the wolf to swipe me. I slipped past it with a somewhat feel of ease. Due to its increased size, the creature was a whole hell of a lot slower.

“Come on you big piece of lumber! I need some firewood!” I yelled, again in a Schwarzenegger tone. The gigantic Timberwolf turned and began following me. I slipped deviously through the cavern and out the other side, the Timberwolf foolishly following me.

Just as I expected, its body was just a tad bit too big. Despite the wolf being to large, it started foolishly forcing itself through. Several stress cracks erupted throughout the cavern and up the gorge wall. Just as it began exiting the cavern, I fired several shots at a large piece of deformed rock.

The full metal jacket rounds took chunks out of the loose stone and it was enough to send severed cracks beneath the boulder. Gravity hammered the final nail in the coffin, the large rock fell from it's unstable resting place and to the depths bellow. The wolf went to let out a horrifying howl, but was cut off as the boulder crushed its head. The boulder was followed by the cavern collapsing behind it, turning into an avalanche of stone.

The Timberwolf was covered in stone, completely crushed and buried. “Rest in pieces,” I quoted. I let out a pained sigh as I began to climb the now stationary ramp of collapsed rock.

I reached the top of the gorge and looked out to the scenery. I let out another deep breath, sitting down on my rump before sheathing my knife and resting my rifle beside me. I wavered a bit, then laid onto my back. Though I was bleeding, it wasn’t fatal, nor were there protruding fangs left splintered in my arm like the last time I had a confrontation with those blasted wolves. Finally, the theme playing in my head ceased, and I was able to be at peace. I felt the presence of two figures approach me. Without looking, I nodded to them. “Howdy… fine day, huh?” I asked.

“EVAN! You’re bleeding!” I heard Derpy cry out before I felt her slide beside me, gently taking hold of my arm and examining it. “Oh no… oh no, this is really bad… this is really, really, really bad!” She began to become frantic.

I reached my left arm around her and pulled her in for a bloody hug. “Thank you Derpy… for having my back,” I told her. I felt her jittery breathing against my chest as she held onto me, not wanting to let go.

“That is… kind of bad. We should get you to Nurse Redheart,” I heard the cyan pegasus state. I looked up to her and reached out painfully with my right arm.

“My name’s Evan, but you can call me Burdy if yah fancy,” I introduced myself. She shook my hand with her hoof.

“Rainbow Dash… and thanks for saving me… but don’t get me wrong, I would’ve totally gotten out of there by myself if you hadn’t showed up,” she stated boastfully. I laughed painfully as I rested my head back against the ground.

* * *

Hours later…

I lay in a medical bed in the local Ponyville hospital. I stroked my left hand down my now healed right arm. “Goddamn… those healing potions sure are something,” I muttered.

Suddenly, my hospital room door swung open and Twilight rushed in, quickly grabbing hold of me and hugging me tightly. “Oh my Celestia! Evan, are you alright? Please tell me you’re alright! Oh, I heard the awful story… you’re not alright are you? Oh no this is awful, I’ve failed as a teacher and now I’ll never…” I silenced her by bringing my right index finger to her mouth.

“Easy,” I said calmly before stroking my forearm. “See? Good as before… actually, better than before. I feel great,” I told her. She looked in shock, and a worried curiosity filled her gaze as she inspected my body, which was covered by a medical blanket. I no longer had my combat jacket and cargo pants on. Instead, I was in a medical gown.

“So if you’re fine, then why… why are you still in bed?” She asked and I shrugged.

“Meh… don’t know. I think they want to experiment on me some more. You know, like a lab rat?” I laughed playfully. She slumped down in the chair beside my medical bed and buried her face into her hooves.

“Oh my Celestia Evan… That was way too close. What were you even doing anyway?” She asked and I laughed.

“Learning about friendship…" I trailed off as I realized that I had indeed learned something. "Give me a second…” I stated as I reached over to the hospital nightstand. Grabbing a pencil and paper, I began jotting down a note.

Dear Sparkly princess mare,
Today I learnded that a pony should not be pressured into doing something they don’t want to. Even if you tell them they don’t have to, they feel obliged to go just because you are, like peer-pressure. It's wrong to make a friend feel pressured into coming with you, especially if they feel uncomfortable. Facing fears may be one thing, but facing death isn’t something to do with friends all the time. In the future, I promise not to bring my friends on adventures unless they absolutely really badly want to really face a life or death situation with me.

Reluctantly yours,
Burdy

Chapter 6

Contains explicit scenes

‘Oh god… ‘tis so embarrassing…’

“Evan, you’re really handsome. Do any other girls ever tell you that?” Drew asked. I blushed heavily and looked to the distance in pure shyness.

“Uhm… no… you… uhm… you ha-ave really pretty eyes…” I stammered timidly. One of my oldest friends in the whole world, Noah, coughed as he choked on a drag of his joint.

“Drew…” He coughed again then laughed. “You’re one of the only…” He wheezed loudly and a fume of marijuana smoke left both his nostrils along with his mouth. “You’re one of the only people who can make Burd stammer like that…” He trailed off and laughed before taking another long drag on the joint, before passing it along to another person, whom I didn’t know.

Drew laughed then brushed aside a fluff of her two tone hair that had managed to impair her vision. She had mostly blonde hair with streaks of black, plus she was drop dead gorgeous, at least that's what people said… and it goes to figure that she always teases me and makes me blush like a fool.

The man puffing on the joint offered it to me and I waved my hand, making Noah laugh. “You won’t get him to smoke. He’s a straight edge,” Noah laughed.

“Square,” the guy muttered and I gave him a cold glare. “Uhm… nothing by it dude… just saying, you know man? Chillax dude,” he stated defensively. Drew piped up before anyone else could talk.

“You can’t REALLY be a straight edge,” she spoke casually and I nodded.

“Like a razor,” I replied subtly, not having a care in the world about the subject.

“No way. You at least have sex… right?” she asked and, again, Noah laughed while he coughed on the rather potent marijuana.

“Yeah…” he snickered as he tried to clear his lungs. “Burdy, have sex… that’s a good one… he’s borderline gay,” he laughed and I shot him a cold glare and he shrugged. “Well you are dude… you’ve never had sex, hell, you’ve never even kissed a girl. And you’re mom doesn’t count,” he countered me before I could even make a comeback.

“Well…” I trailed off as I tried to think up something clever. I bit my lip and frowned. Damn me to hell, figures he gets me.

Drew saved me from the tight situation I was in. “Well that’s okay. We’ll get married and live up in the mountains together. Right Evan?” she asked, again making me blush as she had a serious tone.

“Uhm… I uhh… uh heh-heh…” I stammered. The other pot smoking people hanging around in the group chuckled as Drew made a bumbling buffoon out of me.

* * *

Sunday, March 17th, 2014…

I awoke from the memory dream and rubbed my head. I was still in the hospital because… well, the doctors didn’t actually tell me why I had to stay here, but I was supposed to get out today. ‘God… it feels like I’m in prison,’ I thought to myself.

“How are you feeling this morning?” A voice asked from my left side.

“Good,” I replied, just as my stomach grumbled. I reached over to the nightstand beside my bed and retrieved my engagement ring, slipping it on and having a look at it.

“You don’t really take that off much, do you?” The figure beside me asked and I shook my head.

“Nope. I think it says in the bible somewhere that you’re supposed to keep your wedding ring on,” I told her as I straightened the ring.

“You’re… you’re married?” she asked and I shook my head before turning to the nurse. She was really pretty and kind, though a little timid at times when she spoke to me, probably due to my mysterious and different body.

“Nope,” I replied as I wiggled my ring into view, letting light produced from the overhead bulbs gleam against the black synthetic diamond.

“Then… if you aren’t married or engaged, why do you call it an engagement ring?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Because it’s an engagement ring. That and it’s on my ring finger,” I informed her. She rubbed her chin as she tried to comprehend my mentality.

“You’re very strange. Do all of your species act this way?” she asked and I shook my head.

“Far as I know, I’m one of a kind,” I told her with a wink.

“Well, I just came to inform you that you’re free to leave now.” She stepped back as to allow me to get out of bed. I went to sit up but realized that something was wrong.

A faint blush raced across my face and I laid back down. “Uhm… can I j-just get my bearings into place?” I asked and she nodded then walked out of the room.

‘Great… morning wood,’ I thought to myself as I lifted the bed sheets. Luckily I was lying sideways so it wasn’t protruding… but I didn’t have any clothes, minus the medical robe and underwear.

“Go away you little prick…” I whispered to myself. Generally it should go away in less than two or three minutes. I sat there, waiting and thinking about random and non-generic topics, ranging from plants to machine-guns.

I still felt my member stiff as a diamond. I looked back to him. “Hey you… yeah… go the fuck away already,” I hissed but to no avail.

I waited for what felt like hours, but in the end it was only ten minutes. I tapped my index finger on the nightstand in an irritated and inpatient way. Still it wouldn’t go away.

“This is taking forever,” I muttered as I stood up and got out of bed. Without even looking, I knew that this would be terribly awkward. Sticking to his full attention, my little buddy… big buddy now, made a rather lewd tent out of my boxers.

I tried to shuffle him around, but it was either a tent or I’d have him protruding out of my boxers through the leg holes. “You, my little friend, are a nuisance and need to go away,” I told him in a calm tone.

“Mr. Burdick, are you ready to leave now?” I heard a voice ask from outside the door.

“Uhm… where’s my clothes?” I asked, hoping that she wouldn’t have to bring them in.

“Twilight Sparkle took them to have them repaired for you. She said they’d be at Carousel Boutique,” she informed me. ‘Great… that’s in town,’ I thought to myself.

“Uhm… okay yeah… uhh… you mind if I keep this robe?” I asked. There was a moment’s pause, then came my reply.

“I suppose…” she trailed off. “It doesn’t really fit any of our patients, it is XXL,” she informed me. ‘Great… that makes me feel fat,’ I thought then grabbed my stomach.

“No fat, but no abs… you’ll get there one day Burdy,” I muttered to myself.

“What was that?” Redheart asked.

“Nothing… nothing… uhm, I’m coming out,” I said before opening the door and adding a bit of a hunch to my back to try to conceal my throbbing erection.

She had a little checklist in her hoof and began asking me questions like, ‘Do you feel nauseous?’ or ‘Do you feel light headed?’ and a bunch of other random things.

The final question, however, took me completely off guard. “Do you have…” She trailed off and gulped before blushing. I waited for the question but instead she gave me the checklist. I scrolled down to the question and read it outloud.

“Do you feel like you have Priapism?” I raised an eyebrow and looked at the question. “What the fuck is Priapism?” I asked and Redheart blushed.

“It’s an… an ongoing erection that won’t leave,” she informed me and I gulped.

“I uhm…” I scratched my head, letting go of the overhang on the robe, and in turn revealing my erection. Redheart looked away with a slight blush that showed through her white fur.

“Sign here,” she told me as she indicated a spot on the checklist.

“What’s this?” I asked while I concealed myself once more.

“It’s waiver saying that you won’t sue us if it becomes chronic,” she told me.

“IF WHAT BECOMES CHRONIC?!” I gasped.

“Your erection,” she told me and I gulped. “The tetanus potion we gave you has… adverse side effects,” she informed me.

“Aren’t you supposed to get me to sign the waiver before you give me the stuff?” I asked and she scratched her cheek.

“You uhh… don’t remember?” she asked. A doctor stallion with dark grey fur passed by me. His left foreleg was wrapped in a cast and in a sling. He shot me a cold and nasty glare.

“Oh yeah…” I trailed off as I remembered the events of last night…

* * *

Saturday, March 16th, 2014,

8:34pm…

“Okay Mr. Burdick, just hold still while I give you this needle…” he ordered as he readied a needle.

“You are not stickin’ no needle in me,” I told the grey stallion in doctor fatigues.

“I apologize Mr. Burdick, but it is correct procedure,” he told me.

“Fuck procedure. I’m not getting no fucking needle,” I said as I crawled back along the bed, my back now up against the wall.

“Now Mr. Burdick, this will only hurt a moment, but it’ll help you more than it will hurt,” he tried to assure me.

“No,” I told him. He stepped forwards as to give me the needle, but I swatted it away. He sighed and called for two other doctors to come help him. I began to fidget and squirm as they tried to hold me down.

“Let go of me… hey stop that! You’re not giving me a needle!” I fought against them as they continued to try and probe me with their needle. I just know that they didn’t really have to give me that! They were probably just experimenting on me. Those…

“NAZIS! YOU GUYS ARE FUCKING NAZIS!” I yelled as I continued to squirm. The doctor got his needle closer but, at the last possible moment, I flipped the medical bed over and the railing crushed his left foreleg.

“GAHHH!” The doctor screamed in pain as his bone probably broke. I stood up and grabbed the nightstand lamp then swung defensively at the other two doctors.

“You’re not putting me down like a rabid dog.” I scowled and the doctors tried to corner me.

“Stay back! I warn you, I’ll crack you over the head with this thing!” I warned them, but still they approached.

“STOP!” A voice ordered and the two doctors ceased approaching me. A white furred pony with light pink hair and blue eyes approached. “You have to be more subtle with him, he’s probably frightened,” she spoke softly and her words seemed to put me at ease.

“Subtle? SUBTLE?!” The grey doctor with the broken leg yelled. “HE BROKE MY BUCKIN’ ARM?!” He roared into the nurse’s face, but rather than lash back, she simply stepped forwards towards me.

“Do you have a phobia of needles?” she asked me in a gentle tone and I shook my head.

“Nah, I just don’t like them,” I told her and she nodded, understanding that I was too stubborn to admit that I feared needles.

“It’s okay. We can offer you a potion. Here, drink this. It’ll have the same effects as the tetanus but...” she began to tell me but I cut her off asI took the potion bottle from her hooves and wailed back the entire bottle.

It tasted like strawberries and left a tingly feeling in my throat. The nurse smiled. “I’m Nurse Redheart by the way,” she informed me before turning to leave. However, just before she left the doorway, she turned back and spoke to the broken armed doctor.

“Maybe next time you shouldn’t treat your patient like a wild animal,” she told him with a snicker before wisping away. The doctor gave her an irritated scowl before also leaving.

* * *

I scratched my head and chuckled as everything came back to me. “Oh yeah,” I muttered and Redheart was blushing again. I realized that when I had taken my hand away to scratch my head, my erection had come into view again.

I quickly scribbled down my signature on the form, which looked more like chicken scratch. I nodded to her. “Thanks… uhm… I gotta go,” I told her before rushing out of the hospital, avoiding eye contact with anypony. I needed my clothes, and I needed them fast.

As I raced down the streets, I realized I had no idea where the Carousel Boutique was. I just knew that it was that place where that mare lived. The one that Spike had a crush on or something.

“HELP!” A voice screamed from above. I looked up to realize it was Derpy, once again coming crashing to the ground. I didn’t really have time for this. Well actually I did, I just didn’t want the absolute awkwardness of it.

I held my arms out and within moments the grey pegasus mare crashed into me, cratering us both into the ground with a fume of dust surrounding both our bodies. I felt mail slips cluttering down onto my face as I lay on the ground. The shivering mare on top of my less than decent body was still shaking fearfully.

As the dust cleared, Derpy took her hooves away from her eyes. “EVAN! You saved me… again!” she cheered happily as she stood up. I immediately shot my hands over my robe and covered my groin area, pressing down hard on my erection to conceal it.

“Uh... hey Derpy, what’s up?” I asked, and for some reason my conscience spoke up in a sexual tone. ‘You’re cock.’ I grimaced at the thought of it.

“Uhm… nothing really. Listen, sorry to cut it short, but I gotta continue my mail run,” Derpy said then flew off without another word. I let out a relieved sigh. ‘Smooth one Casanova. Save her ass and you don’t even tap it,’ my dirty conscience thought.

‘Shut your fucking trap, what’s gotten into you?!’ I hissed back silently.

‘A cock,’ it replied back. I scowled silently to myself as I stood up and frantically began running around town again. This was hopeless, I didn’t even have a single idea about where to look for this…

I skidded to a stop in front of a very swanky building and recalled Spike always going on about how Rarity’s place is the most beautiful place in town. It looked very… Victorian aged… and expensive.

I rushed up to the house, or shop, or whatever it was, and knocked with a series of erratic and quick knocks. “Coming darling!” said an illustrious voice. ‘Darling? Who the fuck answers a door with ‘Coming darling’?’ I thought to myself.

‘A mare who wants it badly,’ the voice in my head spoke up. I frowned. ‘One more fucking word out of you and I’ll slit your fucking…’ I was cut off as the door swung open, revealing a beautiful, gleaming white mare with a ridiculous hairdo.

“Well hello darling… why you must be Twilight’s new student. Please do come in, I have your clothes ready for you,” she said in a very inviting voice. I smiled graciously and accepted her invitation, stepping in but with a slight hunch to my back to conceal my stiff member.

“Thank you Miss. You really don’t know how much this means to me,” I thanked her and she waved her hoof carelessly.

“Oh think nothing of it…” She sniffed the air… then again. Each time she sniffed the air she got closer and closer to me. ‘Oh please god, don’t let my cock be sending out a fragrance,’ I thought, but the voice in my head spoke up again.

‘Oh please do. She’d probably just bend over for you and let you slam her cunt,’ It thought up. She sniffed the air almost two feet away from my body then held her hoof over her nose. ‘Oh thank god!’ I thought happily.

“Oh… darling… you smell awful,” she said in a mildly displeased voice. I scratched my head and chuckled, making sure to keep my other hand concealing myself.

“Uhh yeah… they don’t have showers in the hospital,” I told her and she raised a curious eyebrow.

“Oh yes… that’s right. Twilight mentioned something about you being in the hospital. What exactly happened?” she asked curiously.

“Oh nothing really. I just fought off some Timberwolves that were trying to eat… uhm… this mare… her name was… Rainbow Dash I think,” I told her and she gasped.

“You fought off Timberwolves to save Dash?! Oh my sweet Celestia! Was it scary?” she asked. I shrugged and looked to the ceiling, trying to think of an answer. “Well… you must have been terrified for your own life, right?” she asked and I gave a half-assed nod.

“Meh… kind of. I guess at one point I was wondering if they were going to eat me or just kill me,” I told her and she gasped.

“Darling, that’s the most heroic thing I’ve heard all week!” she exclaimed and I rolled my eyes. “Oh right… about your clothes…” She trailed off, still holding her hoof over her nose. “You should really have a shower first. Upstairs, first door on the right,” she informed me.

I gave her a nod and followed her instructions. “Goddamn… this place is swanky,” I muttered to myself.

I opened the bathroom door to reveal an illustrious bathroom. “Man… this mare has a nice place,” I muttered as I closed the door behind me. I walked over to the walk-in shower and began fiddling with the diamond looking taps.

I waited until the shower stream was a nice temperature before I slipped off my robe and underwear. Taking a quick scan of the room, I quickly began fiddling through cupboards and such in search of decent towels but only found expensive fluffy purple ones.

“Beggars can’t be choosers,” I told myself and thankfully the dirty voice in my head didn’t speak up. I was really going to have to speak to Redheart about this. ‘Hey Redheart, thanks for the potion. Not only did it give me a raging hard on, but it gave me a dirty little voice in my head that’ll never shut up,’ I thought to myself, enacting what I’d say to the nurse.

I set the towel on the rack near the shower entrance then stepped in. The steamy hot water felt amazing against my body as I washed myself down. The flooring seemed to be made out of some sort of gem and…

I trailed off as I spotted a pink dildo that resembled that of a horse cock, hanging from the shower tap. I sheepishly looked away, not wanting to think about the mare’s now obvious shower toy.

However, despite my obvious courtesy, the side effects of the tetanus potion quickly kicked into play. I imagined her masturbating with the pink toy and pleasuring herself right in front of me.

Her hair dripping wet and flung down. Her moans echoing in the bathroom as she reached an orgasm. Her cunt twitching as she came…

I covered my eyes in self disgrace. To even think that of the kind unicorn... “Fuck you… fuck you, fuck you!” I hissed silently to myself, but the images were burned into my head, at least for the time being.

My body seemed to move naturally as I reached out and picked up the dildo then compared it to my own throbbing cock. It was noticeably different, having a flared head and a hilt. I compared the size and took notice that it was only about three or four inches longer.

‘Either that means that ponies in this world have smaller dicks than the ones back home or… she bought a small dildo for that tight snatch of hers!’ The dirty little voice in my head spoke up.

“FUCK YOU!” I roared, completely forgetting that I was in somepony else’s house.

“Are you okay in there darling?” A voice asked from what sounded like just outside the door.

“Fine… I’m just fine. I just uhm…” I trailed off as I quickly set the dildo back on the tap where it belonged.

“Okay. I just thought that perhaps you slipped and hurt yourself was all,” she replied. ‘Was she really waiting at the door?’ I thought to myself.

‘No, she’s peeping on you while she masturbates. There’s probably a puddle of her cum…’ I cut off the voice in my head as I slammed a heavy punch across my own cheek, stinging my vision with stars and sending my world spinning.

‘WOW! I really don’t know my own strength,’ I thought to myself as I stabilized my body. Thankfully though, the voice was gone for the moment, but unfortunately my raging boner was still apparent.

I quickly washed off my body then soaped myself up with… ‘Classy Mares’ shampoo. Great, I was washing myself with mare body wash. I probably smell like strawberries now.

I washed away all the soap and took a whiff of my shoulder, only to find that I actually smelt like raspberries. ‘Great… raspberries. I love raspberries,’ I thought sarcastically before turning off the shower head and grabbing the towel off the rack outside the shower.

I dried off my body, but it took a little longer than usual for me to clean my hair, due to its length. “I really need a haircut,” I muttered then looked to the fogged mirror. Using the towel, I wiped away the fog and looked at myself.

My hair was draped down past my eyebrows and threatening to impair my vision while my sideburns and mustache grew freely. “And a shave,” I added in.

I finished drying myself off then wrapped the towel around my hip, placing my left hand over my groin and pressing down hard, trying to non-conspicuously conceal a raging boner.

I stepped out into the hallway, my body dry for the most part, minus my hair which was still damp. “Rarity? Hey, where’d you go?” I called out, wondering where the beautiful mare had gotten off to.

‘Beautiful… ha, not even a month ago would I even call a pony beautiful,’ I thought to myself. Sure they’re cute, in the animal pet sense, but being here so long, I was starting to consider them to be more like the same species than a completely different one.

“Rarity?” I called again.

“Down here darling. I’m just preparing your… clothes.” There was a pause in her sentence that sounded as if she was… disappointed about something. I stepped into a room that was filled with sewing machinery and the likes.

“Darling,” she spoke without actually looking to me, but rather she was looking at my clothes that were grasped in a light blue aura. “Do you always wear green?” she asked and I raised an eyebrow.

“No… I actually barely wear green. I wear camouflage,” I replied.

“It’s the same thing,” she replied back.

“No it’s not,” I stated as I stepped next to her. She turned to look to me and gasped. I gulped, fearing that perhaps she had spotted my odd ‘predicament,’

“Listen, before you…” I began but she spoke before I could finish.

“Twilight was right,” she gasped and I was confused by the statement. ‘Did Twilight somehow know that I had a ridiculous boner and had told ponies? No, she wouldn’t do that… would she?’ I thought to myself.

“She uhh… she was right about what?” I asked, half petrified of her possible reaction.

“Your body is… big… very big,” she replied and I let out a silent and relieved exhale. “Twilight under exaggerated it… you look more like you were chiseled from stone,” she said in a breath-taken voice.

“Wait… what?!” I stammered and she gulped then blushed.

“Nothing darling! Nothing, it uhm… it slipped,” she quickly sputtered out the words then levitated over the clothing, tossing it into my arms. I brought both arms up and grabbed them, forgetting about my… thing.

Looking over my clothes, I realized that she had sewn them so well, it was as if they were brand new. Looking down to the mare with a smile, I spoke genuine words of thankfulness. “Hey thanks… wow, this is super! You’re… looking at me strangely,” I stated and realized that she was blushing and sneaking a peek at my…

“GAH! I’m so sorry Rarity! It’s not what you…” I began, but my sudden outburst of an apology shocked her as well. Obviously she had been lost in her thoughts.

“Eep! Darling I…” she trailed off and used her magic to grasp the towel and try to wrap up my member. She accidentally lost focus and in the end the towel ended up slipping from her grasp and falling to the floor, leaving me bare.

I placed the folded laundry over my groin as my face turned beat red. “Rarity, I swear to god, I… it was…” I stammered as I tried to explain, while at the same time she was trying to sputter out her explanation.

“Darling, it slipped. I didn’t mean to… well, I meant to pull the towel up but then…” We both kept sputtering out random things and never noticed the young white filly watching us.

“OH HEY EVAN!” she squealed in delight. Both our faces went an even darker shade of red as we slowly looked over to the filly who had an undaunting smile. “Rarity, this is the pony…” she stopped for a moment’s pause as she realized I wasn’t a pony. “This is the guy who gave me a ride to school the other day. Remember? I told you that he was super big and strong! I told you so!” she squealed in delight, then gasped and ran up to my side, taking a close look at my ass cheek.

“You’re…” she trailed off with a deep inhale, getting ready for a gasp. “A blank flank!” she squealed in delight. I was about to try and explain to her that humans didn’t get cutie marks, then decided it would be much too long and tedious to try.

“Uhm… Sweetie Belle, darling. We should leave this room for a moment to allow… what’s your name again darling?” Rarity asked sheepishly.

“Evan,” I muttered in terrible embarrassment. “It’s Evan, but you can call me Burdy if you like,” I replied then realized that was a terrible way to introduce myself, considering all that was happening. The duo left and Rarity closed the door behind her. I let out a deep exhale and sighed.

“This day is going to be a long one,” I muttered. ‘Not as long as your cock.’ The dirty voice returned. I slammed another punch across my face, albeit not as hard as before. The voice quickly left and I finished slipping on my clothes.

Walking out of the door, I was greeted by the much younger filly, Sweetie Belle, but not Rarity. “Where’s...” I began, but Sweetie Belle cut me off.

“My sister?! She’s in the washroom taking a shower!” she squealed in delight, nearly vibrating in some kind of excitment. I let out a sigh, knowing pretty well what she’d be doing. “Do you want to go cutie mark crusading?” she asked hopefully.

With the way I was, it wouldn’t be the worst idea, seeing as how she was too young to understand about that. In the same thought however, it wouldn’t be the best idea either. “I can’t,” I said in an apologetic tone. Her face went pouty. “I’m sorry, but I have to go to the hospital.” I told her.

“Why? Are you sick?” she asked in a worried tone.

“Yeah, kind of. I’m not well and I need the help of a doctor,” I informed her, which wasn’t a complete lie. “I have to say goodbye to your sister first, then maybe we’ll go crusading later, okay?” I assured her. Her face gleamed in a bright smile and she zipped off in a fume of dust.

I paced over to the washroom door and knocked. “Gah! What is it?” Rarity’s voice sounded shocked and frantic.

“Listen uhm… Rarity. About the uhm... the thing… long story short, the hospital gave me a potion and that’s why… I was… you know… hard.” I stammered a bit during my explanation, due to the awkwardness of it.

“I… I… well… I hope you enjoy the clothes. Have a splendid day, darling.” Luckily she was good at accepting terms then quickly dropping the subject.

“Thanks Rarity.” I nodded to myself and smirked. “Really, it means a lot.” I called out to her then nodded once more before starting my journey back to the hospital.

* * *

“What do you mean at least six more hours?! That’d be four in the afternoon!” I whispered to Redheart. She gave an embarrassed shrug as her reply.

“So what am I supposed to do about that little voice in my head? Will it ever go away?” I asked and she nodded.

“It’s not actually a little voice. It’s your own thoughts but more… primal and animalistic. Be lucky that you at least have some control over your urges… and clothes,” she told me. I realized that, despite my cargo pants being baggy, there was still a tent pitched at my groin area.

I quickly shuffled my cock around into a less conspicuous spot. “What do I do till it stops?” I asked and she rubbed her chin.

“Well… you could always just have sex. It won’t get rid of your erection, but it will stop the urges for a while.” she informed me.

“Sex?! Sex with what? What am I supposed to do? Go up to some random mare in the streets and be like, ‘Yo sexy, let’s get down and fuck right now cause I’m hornier than a ten puckered Billy-goat’?” I whispered.

She sighed. “Well, you could always just masturbate. That would have a similar effect, though your urges will come back significantly sooner,” she informed me.

“So what? I just go beat off in the washroom?” I asked and she shook her head.

“Please don’t, we just had them cleaned,” she told me. I let out a distressed sigh and she rested a hoof on my side.

“Don’t worry, it’ll be over before you know it,” she assured me. “That and you could always try to take your mind off it,” she offered a possible suggestion.

“Thanks Red… I’ll see you later.” I gave my goodbye with a nod and proceeded towards Sweet Apple Acres. ‘Hard work should do the trick, and if it doesn’t, slave labour will.’

* * *

“Listen AJ, I need rough work. Something that needs two or three ponies to do. And I’ll do it by myself... alone,” I told her. She raised a curious eyebrow from the odd request.

“Well yah certainly are… willin’ today. Ain’t yah?” she asked.

‘Willing to bend you over and fuck you silly,’ the voice in my head muttered. I slammed a heavy punch across my jaw, sending my equilibrium way off balance.

“WHAT YAH DO THAT FER?!” she gasped and I straightened my posture.

“Nothing. Trust me, you don’t want to know,” I told her. She raised an eyebrow with a hint of worried suspicion and scratched the back of her head.

“Alright… well…uhh..." She trailed off and looked around for something that could keep me occupied. "We got some heavy bales a straw that need tah be stacked. Reckon ah was gonna have Mac and muhself do it, but if yer willing tah do it alone… it would spare up some hooves,” she told me.

“Straw bales, got it!” I stated quickly, then rushed off to the barn. I looked to the bales, they must’ve been 60 inches wide. “Goody! Okay you little shit, let’s get busy.”

‘Yeah, get busy alright.’ The voice spoke up. I brought my face into an angered frown. ‘Oh just you wait you little horn dog, just you wait.’

In a furious anger, I began flipping the bales, placing them in perfect rows. I took a deep breath and wondered to myself how on earth I’d stack them. I looked over to a large bail hook that was attached to a rope and pulley. I looked up and realized it was some sort of bale lifting thingy. At least that’s what I was hoping.

I jabbed the hook into the first bale then started pulling on the rope that was looped through the pulley located at the roof of the barn.

“Ngh!” I grunted painfully as I hefted the bale up. I pushed the bale over the top of the others then set it down. “This’ll work,” I said with an exhausted breath.

Luckily they couldn’t have weighed more than 400 pounds, but they were still awkward to lift, even with the pulley. “Come on… Come on…”

‘Yeah, cum on me… no wait, cum in me.’ The dirty little voice spoke up.

“SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH… I’M NOT CUMMING ON ANYTHING…” I roared. I brutally worked myself to my absolute limits and before I knew it the last bale was stacked in place. I had successfully stacked rows ten by ten and two high.

I collapsed to the ground, breathless and exhausted. “Can ah ask yah somethin… personal?” Applejack asked in a more worried tone than before. I hadn’t even realized that she was near me.

“At this point… I can’t stop you,” I replied. ‘You couldn’t even stop her if she sat down and rode your cock,’ the voice chimed. I raised my hand and feathered myself across the jaw with an exhausted punch.

“Are yah… well yah know… not right in the head?” Applejack asked.

“I… live in a world of… colourful ponies… how could I stay sane?” I gasped through exhausted breaths.

“Ah meant… well, ah shoulda asked first, but… I heard ya yelling about an hour ago and came tah check what was wrong. Ah know it’s wrong tah spy on ponies, but yah were talking dirty tah yerself and yah were angry about it as well...” she trailed off with a look of worry on her face.

“Can I… tell you something…” I was still panting heavily. She stepped closer and I took a deep breath as I calmed myself. “The hospital gave me... some sort of potion... that gave me a raging boner... and a perverted conscience. Apparently it won’t go away... until four,” I told her.

She let out a relieved sigh. “Well that’s good. Ah wasn’t sure how ah’d take it if muh employee got off on abusing himself at work,” she told me. We shared a brief laugh before she spoke again. “Well, reckonin that it ends at four, means ya still got another hour or so before yah return to normal.” She gave me a nod then tossed me a bag of bits. “That's a hundred 'n' twenty bits. Seein as how yah did two ponies’ worth a work for the last five hours a figured ah’d give yah a bonus.” She nodded before turning and walking away.

My gaze fell to the floor as my body started to shut down from all the exhaustion. I was ready to just roll over and pass out, but a burst of energy whizzed through my body as I suddenly got super horny.

“Oh for fuck sakes,” I hissed. It didn’t matter if jerking off didn’t solve this problem, my urges were raging out of control right now and I needed to get relief. I got up and quickly began making my way towards Twilight’s. I’d just hop in the back of my truck, take a look at that porn magazine Cheerilee gave me, all the while I’d beat off, then voila. By that time the potion side effects should be worn off.

I passed Applejack who chuckled as I ran past her. “Ah didn’t think yah’d be able tah even walk after all that work,” she stated.

“I gotta go rub one off,” I uttered out the blunt truth. Her face went pale.

“Uhm… well… uhh… thanks fer sharing,” she replied as I continued off into the distance. Ponyville wasn’t all that far away and at this point I was in a full tilted run.

‘Jeeze, I’ve never been so bent on getting home just to jerk off,’ I thought to myself.

‘You never know, maybe Twilight will just suck you off,’ my conscience thought.

“Okay fuck off! That’s wrong on so many levels that I’m not even going to start.” I scowled at myself. Suddenly I collided with a light cherry red earth pony. Not paying attention while arguing with myself and running all at the same time was probably a bad combination, especially when I was horny.

“Oh shit… Cherry, I’m so sorry,” I apologized. I stood up and offered her my hand.

“Oh… Burdy, it’s so nice to see you again,” she said in an upbeat tone. I nodded before going to race off again. “Wait!” She held a hoof at my side and I turned back to her.

“Yeah?” I asked in a rushed tone.

“I need to ask you something…” she trailed off as she blushed. “That night… where you came to see me after hours and you asked if I was in heat…” she trailed off and I gulped.

“Listen, I didn’t mean anything by it. I didn’t mean that I thought you were loose or that you’re slutty. I just thought that because you showed me the picture of the mare in heat that you were in heat and that you were actually trying to tell me something,” I sputtered out the entire sentence rather quickly and it took her a moment to register everything.

“Well actually, it was about that. I had you lock the door because… what I’m trying to say is that I was… I still am…” She blushed and timidly looked away then leaned forwards so that nopony else could hear her. “I’m in heat,” she whispered.

My cock throbbed from her information. Whether it be because of the fact she was in heat or the way she whispered it into my ear I’d never know, but I needed to get gone and quick.

“Listen…” I grunted as I tried to shuffle my cock to a less provoking way. “Cheerilee… I got a little problem… a big one actually and I…” I grunted again and this time I had to completely press down on my groin to keep it from poking out.

“Well, I just wanted to ask if you weren’t coming around anymore because you thought that I was slutty,” she replied.

“What?!” I gasped and she stammered out a response.

“Well, I had reacted in a way that one would have thought I wasn’t in heat. But then you just stopped coming to school and I never heard from you so I thought that maybe… you didn’t want to hang out with those fillies at school anymore because… you thought I was a loose and didn't want to associate with me,” she informed me.

“What?! No way! Cherry… gah… Cherry listen… ngh… long story short. I got attacked by Timberwolves, I went to the hospital… ahh… they gave me a potion that gave me a raging boner that won’t go away for at least another hour… gahhh… and now I gotta jerk off because my urges are going insane,” I grunted out my response.

Cherry blinked for a moment as everything I just said registered through her thoughts. “It sounds like you're in heat…” she said in a hushed tone. I went to rush to my truck but Cheerilee stopped me. “Can we… do it together?” she asked. Her question took me way off guard.

“What?! We can’t do that. We barely know each other,” I whispered.

“I know but… it would make me feel better if I masturbated with a friend,” she replied in a hopeful voice.

“Wait… masturbate. As in, just masturbate together?” I asked and she nodded. “Oh… well… okay maybe… I thought that you…” I was cut short when she suddenly pulled me into a nearby bush.

It was dimly lit, but the bushes were thick and tall enough that I couldn’t even see through the dense leaves. Heck, I couldn’t even figure out how there was light in here. Cheerilee rested her head against a tree trunk with a lustful sigh then pulled out a pink dildo.

She spread her legs then touched a button on the dildo and it hummed to life. The end slowly rotated in clockwise rotations. I muttered to myself, “Ah… a vibrator huh?”

She gave me a lustful look. “Wow… I uhh…” I stammered as she continued to watch me while masturbating. The earth pony in front of me began to massage her sides with her left hoof while she brought the toy up to her lips. Sucking on the tip of her vibrating toy, she let out a silent hum as she went about her business.

My body was stuck in place, completely shocked that I was masturbating with a pony elementary school teacher. The rotating cock slowly slipped out of her mouth and she trailed it down her neck, then down her chest, past her breasts and finally to her groin.

My breath became nervous and shaky. I had the painful urge to just crawl over top of her and fuck her like a mad animal. I winced as a lustful fantasy played through my head.

* * *

I sat up to my hands and knees and scampered over to her like a playful puppy, tongue dangling out of my mouth, drool slipping to the soft soil below.

Her eyes went wide but I quickly closed the gap between our faces as I panted my lips to hers. Her eyes quickly fluttered shut as we embraced in a lustful kiss. Our tongues battled it out, trying to pin the other in a show of dominance. Surprisingly, she bested me, shoving her tongue deep into the back of my throat.

In a brief motion, she cuffed her hindleg around mine then flipped me onto my back. I gasped from the sudden aggressiveness but was even more surprised when she pinned me to the ground. "If it's a show of dominance you want..." She trailed off with a cheeky smile.

I was wondering just what exactly she had in mind, but quickly found out as I felt a soft fluffiness rubbing around my groin. Her hooves quickly went to work and undid my belt then slid down my pants and underwear. The soft fluffiness turned out to be her tail, which wisped around my shaft, making throb, driving my urges insane.

* * *

A soft moan snapped me back to reality. I lightly slapped myself in the face. 'Come on Burdy, keep it together man. You aren't seriously be contemplating fucking a mare? Are you?' I thought to myself. I looked over to the mare across from me. Her left hoof trailed over her puffy clit and she began a gentle massage on herself. Her silent coos were like music to my ears, driving me to a near breaking point. She brought the tip of the rubber shaft to her entrance, letting it rotate and move her folds aside without much assistance of the user.

I tried to steady my breath but it was no use. The scent that was being set off from her cunt was intoxicating. “Aren’t you going to join in? It’s no fun with just one pony doing it,” she stated in a lustful voice.

Without needing further encouragement, I unbuckled my belt and slid my pants partly down, along with my boxers, letting my shaft fling out and stick straight up. Cheerilee eyed me up for a moment before returning to her own leisurely activity.

I brought my shaky right hand down to my throbbing cock and gave my tip a gentle rub, sending tingles of pleasure down to the base of my rod.

Cheerilee brought the humming toy up to her mouth and spit on the tip, then used her hoof to spread the lubricant down the entire shaft. I looked down to her twitching slit. It was soaking wet and quivering with anticipation.

I once again just considered crawling over and just ramming my cock into her needy cunt. I was once again, lost into my fantasy.

* * *

My breath quickened as she lowered herself over my shaft. As her entrance touched the tip of my shaft, tingles of pleasure were sent to the base of my member. I let out a gasping grunt. "Guh... uhh..." I panted as she continued to lower herself onto me. Every inch felt like a new sensation of pleasure.

"Oh god... sweet Jesus." I moaned as she took the final length with one simple thrust downwards. The burst of pleasure that shot through me nearly sent me over the edge. I pulled my arms away from her grip and grappled her sides as I began to wildly thrust her.

She quickly pinned me again, stabilizing me and keeping my body still still. I felt myself twitch inside of her. God I just wanted to rut like a wild dog. She shook her head playfully and shook her hoof. "Ah-ah-ahh, none of that. I'm still dominant, remember?" She teased.

She began slow and gentle slides. Gliding up and stopping for a moment, I could tell both of us desired me to fill her again. She slowly slid back down, taking my entire length with a simple yet very fluent motion. My legs squirmed in pleasure, my right started to spasm as I endured the mentally painful yet physically pleasureful act. God it was like she knew exactly how to build me up to the brink, without actually setting me off.

* * *

I snapped back to reality, naturally this time. Cheerilee hummed a moan as she brought the pink toy back down to her puffy pink slit. I began stroking my shaft, imagining that the vibrator was actually my cock. My left hand rested shakily against my forehead. This was wrong, kind of. My heart was racing out of control in both nervousness and lust.

Cheerilee ever so slowly began to slide the toy inside of her slit, her lips spreading apart to accommodate it. She closed her eyes and continued with the slow insertion, so slow that rock corrosion seemed faster.

“Mmm… ahh… oh fuck yes…” Cheerilee muttered quiet and dirty curses to herself while I sat silent, jerking off while I watched her masturbate. She opened her eyes and giggled at me. “Aren’t you going to say anything?” she asked.

“Uhm… oh yeah… uhh…” Talking dirty while I masturbated wasn’t exactly a huge thing for me, and made me feel extremely awkward in doing it.

“When was the last time your relieved yourself?” she asked curiously and I thought to myself. I wasn’t exactly good at memorizing little things, heck, I’d even forgotten how old I was once or twice.

“Oh… uhm… about seven months ago I guess,” I replied and she gasped.

“Oh sweet Celestia… that long?!” she asked in a shocked tone and I simply nodded. “Well, did you at least have sex in that time gap?” I shook my head again. “How do you go on with your urges constantly nagging at you?” she curiously asked as she began gentle thrusts with the vibrator.

“Oh uhh… I usually don’t have urges. I just work and pump iron,” I informed her. I was going to add in ‘shoot guns’ but didn’t feel like explaining what guns were.

“Wow… you really have great self-control. I need to masturbate at least twice a day. Once in the mornings before school and once before bed. Can’t get through the day without it,” she informed me.

I stifled a slight chuckle. “Uhm… thanks for sharing,” I stammered out a dopey reply. She suddenly let out a relieved sigh. “Did you just… you know?” I asked and she raised an eyebrow.

“Cum?” She answered my question with another question. I nodded and she shook her head, “No… would you like to see me cum?” she asked, and my head nodded all on its own. “Okay, but try to match my tempo,” she told me.

As she began to slide the fake phallus in and out of her cunt, I began to stroke my shaft in similar motions to her toy, still pretending it was my cock going into her. “God I’d like to just get up and fuck her,” I thought but quickly realized that I had just said that out loud. I blushed but let out a silent sigh as I realized that she probably hadn’t heard me over her own constant moaning.

Every time she slid the dildo inside of her body it made a slick sound as the wet balls of the dildo slapped her ass. Then as she slid it out, it would make a slurping sound.

She began to pick up the pace and I matched her but was quickly overcome by a building pressure in my groin. “Holy shit… I’m gonna cum,” I grunted and Cheerilee whispered to me. My mind blurred as I was once again sucked into my fantasy world.

* * *

Her pace quickened, and so did her moans of pleasure. A sloppy wet squelching sound could be heard as she started to slam down on my cock at a rather fast pace.Her left hoof left it's place and rested on her forehead as she began to blush. Without her hoof restraining my arm, it was free game.

My left immediately shot to her sides and gripped her hips while my right struggled out of her vice-grip hold and followed a similar fashion as my left hand. I began to pump my hips against hers, forcing myself deeper than before with each inward thrust. Her moans became erratic and it was clear. We were both close.

* * *

"Guh... I'm gonna cum." I grunted, not really paying attention that I was muttering that out loud.

“Already?… slow down, I don’t want to masturbate alone,” she told me. I was going to ask ‘Don’t you masturbate alone every day?’ But then quickly remembered that we were in some random bush in the middle of town.

I slowed my pace, but still the pressure in the base of my cock grew. Just a simple touch kept building up towards my climax. She quickened her thrusts and soon she began letting out whimpered moans, trying to keep our little session secret from ponies that might be passing by.

“Oh… oh I’m almost there…” she whispered. I began to pick up the pace as well. The slurping sound of her pussy being pounded by the dildo sounded like anypony passing by would hear it, but that was probably because we were trying to keep it quiet.

Her breathing accelerated to a point that I couldn’t match. Precum leaked out the top of my dick and acted as a slick lubricant as I continued to jerk myself off. Once again my mind left to my sexual fantasy, drug induced sexual fantasy I might add.

* * *

Her body gave out on her as she reached her orgasm. She let out a scream of ecstasy as she collapsed onto my chest. I kept thrusting my hips, slamming her cunt with my throbbing shaft. "Ahh, yes... oh Celestia yes, I'm cumming!" She screamed. With how loud she was screaming, I wouldn't be surprised if a bunch of ponies were watching us right now.

My motions quickened and I felt a splash of viscous liquids lather onto my groin area. Suddenly her inner walls began to clamp around my entire length and it was too much for me to handle. With once last grunt, I grabbed her upper body and pulled her tight to mine. I slammed myself deep inside her and let go of my restraint.

My entire length throbbed in a tidal wave of pleasure. A burst of hot cum lathered her insides and she moaned. "Oh goddess yes... oh fill me like the filthy slut that I am." I twitched again, another jet shot out and she continued her moaning rant.

* * *

A real life moan snapped me back to reality. “Oooh… oh yes… oh Celestia yes… OH YES… I’M CUMMING!” Cheerilee cried out. She gave a few last powerful thrusts with the vibrator then drove it deep into her crevice and left it there, the rotating head still wiggling around inside of her.

Her hind legs kicked and spasmed as she endured her awaited orgasm. A viscous fluid squirted out from her stuffed cunt, some landing on my leg. My moment arrived shortly after hers. I felt a tense pressure in my balls, then all of a sudden it felt as if a tidal wave burst from my cock.

Globs of sticky wet semen spurted out, spraying in random directions. One jet of cum splattered against my freshly cleaned combat jacket, staining it with my essence. My cock kept twitching, each twitch let out another jet of cum, but I paid more attention to my soiled coat. “Cock a block,” I cursed to myself, not able to piece together a clever swear.

I looked over to Cheerilee, who was sitting right across from me, only to see that some of my spooge had splattered onto her belly, lacing her breasts as well.

“Evan…” she whispered and I gulped.

“Cheerilee, I’m so sorry,” I apologized but she shook her head.

“Don’t be. That was amazing. I haven’t had a MP for a long time,” she replied and I raised an eyebrow.

“An MP?” I asked and she nodded.

“A masturbating partner,” she replied casually and I chuckled.

“I’m sorry Cheerilee… I’m a pig,” I told her. My urges now fading for the moment, I reflected on the fact that I had just jerked off with a pony, while imagining myself to be fucking her.

“No you’re not. If you were a pig you would’ve fucked me,” she informed me.

“What logic is in that? We were masturbating together,” I replied and she giggled.

“Don’t you know how MPs work?” she asked and I shook my head. She rolled her eyes and began explaining it to me. “Two good friends get together and masturbate together because they aren’t afraid of relieving themselves with a close friend. At the same time there is no actual sexual contact between the two, so one doesn’t have to worry about the other trying to make a move on them,” she explained. ‘That made absolutely no friggin sense. Well, maybe a little,’ I thought to myself.

“It’s more or less for mares who don’t want sexual relationships but still want somepony close who they can masturbate with,” she finished explaining and it made a little bit more sense, but still was kind of a weird idea.

A sudden drowsiness came over me and my world started to spin. “Oh… uhm… Cherry… I think I’m gonna take a nap,” I muttered as I tucked in my cock and buckled up my pants.

I was out before I hit the ground and my world went black. Figures that masturbating made me more exhausted than a hard day’s work… ha-ha, hard.

* * *

Cheerilee lay ontop of me, panting heavily as our mixed juices seeped into the ground. "Oh goddess Evan, that was wonderful. We should definitely do that again." She whispered to me. She pulled off my shaft and a rather soft Scluck sound could be heard, but nopony but us probably heard it.

I nodded as she rested her head on my chest. "I've always wanted a special somepony..." She trailed off and giggled. "Or I guess in my case, a special somehuman." She laughed timidly.

"Somebody... that special somebody." I whispered back. I felt her lips curl into a smile on my chest as we both past out.

* * *

I awoke several hours later and it was dark out. 'Man... if masturbating with someone else makes it that difficult to figure out the difference between real life and a fantasy... next time I'm just gonna jerk off in my truck.' My penis had finally returned to its soft state and was more comfortable than before. I found a little scrap of paper with a note on it. I leaned over and read it.

‘Thank you for cumming with me Evan. It meant a lot to me to have an MP. If any time you need one, don’t be afraid to ask.

Cheerilee, xoxo’

I let out a sigh as I rolled onto my back. I had a feeling that this was one of those times that, even though it felt like a really, really, REALLY fucked up dream, it probably actually happened.

“Well, at least I learned something about friendship,” I muttered as I pulled out a pencil and paper, quickly scribbling down a message for Twilight.

‘Dear princess Sparkler,
Today I learns that masturbation is mutual. They call it MP, masturbating partner. It was weird and didn’t make a lot of sense and I did it with a close friend because we both had a ridiculous urge to rut. So we masturbated together. Yeah, figure that one out, it confuses the hell out of me too. All I wanted to do was jerk off in the back of my truck while reading a porn mag, instead I end up rubbing one off with a friend.

You’re #1 henchman,
Burdy

Author's Note

I feel like buying some Lucky Charms right now, and some Transmission fluid (Cadence doesn't leak, she marks her territory) Before winter comes (Which in Canada is nearly 10 months of the year, except now it's not because global warming has killed our snow, I blame Al Gore for this, he jinxed us.) Anyway, I need to get an oil undercoating, probably a new Tranny pan, or just plug the leak, and winter tire which cost nearly $2000 for a set... *Makes Whiny sound* Now I can't buy that elephant gun that I wanted to buy

Chapter 7

‘I’d love me some cereal right about now…’

I paced along the aisles of No-frills, looking for some appropriate cereal. God, having a kid was hard. You ask them what they want for breakfast and the smartass replies: “Food.”

I continued down the aisle, browsing through Bran Flakes, Mini-Wheats, Shreddies…

I mouthed my tongue around as I thought about all the options. Figures that Chad had a fight with his mom and told her that he’d run away to my place. And now for the last week I’ve been taking care of some kid who wasn’t even mine. Well, at least I knew him, and he was an alright sport I guess… minus the smartass attitude he had.

“Well… he probably wouldn’t like cereal without lots of sugar…” I muttered as I browsed into the more flavourful selection. ‘Hmm… Honey Nut Cheerios?’ I wondered but then switched to the more diabetes prone cereal. “Ah perfect,” I said as I began browsing through the cereal brands I always saw on TV.

“Now… what to get?” I asked myself before thinking for a minute. I shrugged then began walking along the aisle, tossing in every diabetic prone cereal I saw: Lucky Charms, Fruit Loops, Nesquik cereal, Reese Puffs, Cinnamon Toast Crunch, Alpha Bits, Honey Combs, and then more Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

“Well, if he doesn’t like this, then he can shove it,” I muttered as I looked over my shopping list. ‘Having a job is great, everyone is always like ‘Oooh I have no money!’ But they always spend their money on booze and smokes,’ I laughed to myself at my thoughts.

I looked around the store for a while longer, aimlessly browsing. Finally, a smug smile crossed my face and I placed my left foot on the bottom frame of the shopping cart, pushing myself along at an increasingly immature speed.

“Wee… Wee!... WEE! YEEHAW!” I yelled as I rounded a corner. An older looking fellow, probably in his late fifties, gave me a sour look of disapproval. I smiled brightly and gave him a wave as I sped by him on my shopping cart.

* * *

Tuesday, March 19th, 2014…

I awoke from yet another memory dream. My room was still dark and no light source of any kind pierced the darkness. I reached over to the nightstand and picked up my watch.

‘12:39am,’ so why the hell was I up? What in Celestia’s name had disturbed my sleep? I spotted a crack of light that slipped in underneath the basement door. As I looked closer, I heard hoof steps upstairs, then the bathroom door closed, followed by soft and faint crying.

“Oh god… Twilight’s crying again,” I muttered to myself. This was the… seventh time in the last twenty four hours. Ever since yesterday morning, right after breakfast, she got really moody.

“It must be her time of the month,” I muttered. The crying however, didn’t cease, as usual, and went on for another twenty minutes. “Alright… I wanna go to sleep…” I muttered to myself as I stood up. I slipped on my engagement ring, then headed upstairs.

“Whatever’s bugging her, she’s got to get it out of her because I can’t sleep,” I complained. Reaching the bathroom door, I realized that her sobbing was actually quite loud, not enough to wake the neighbours, or even somepony if they were sleeping in the living room, but still significantly loud.

I knocked on the door and the sobbing came to an abrupt end, but the voice that answered was riddled with stifled sobs. “I’m… in here… I’ll be out in a second…” The voice then continued to weep and I knocked again.

“Hey Twilight? Can we talk?” I asked, but the reply was a little different than I expected.

“There’s nothing to talk about. It’s over,” she sobbed. I let out a disgruntled sigh. ‘Mares… they’re the same as women. Cry about shit and become all emotional but won’t talk about it… that and they keep everyone in the house awake when they cry,’ I thought to myself.

“What’s over Twilight? Can’t we just talk about it?” I asked pleadingly.

“Why don’t you… go and… talk with Cheerilee about it!” She snapped back at me through a few stifled sobs.

“What the fu…” I rolled my eyes. “What the hell are you going on about? You’re the one who’s crying, shouldn’t we be talking?” I asked. The door suddenly swung open and I was greeted by Twilight’s tear riddled and anger stressed face.

“You want to talk? Fine we’ll talk. Why don’t you go live with your new fillyfriend?!” She scolded me.

“Fillyfriend? What the hell are you talking about?” I asked, curious still to what was going on.

“Fillyfriend, friend with benefits, buck buddy, whatever you want to call her! Why don’t you go live with her?!” She scowled and I brought my hands up in the air in confusion.

“Who the hell are you talking about?!” I exclaimed, my thoughts spinning in circles about the whole topic.

“Your… your… YOUR MP!” She said through more sobs before covering her eyes, slamming the door in my face, and continuing to dreadfully sob.

“My M… what? You mean Cheerilee?” I asked. There was a moment’s silence then came my reply.

“Yes… if you’re ‘such’ good friends with her… then why don’t you go move in with her? Be her special somepony, live happily ever after and just leave me alone!” She cried. ‘This mare gets more confusing by the minute,’ I thought to myself.

“Hold up Twilight. Slow down…” I let out a deep breath. “What the hell are you so moody about?” I asked and the door slightly opened.

“You…” she trailed off and I pointed to myself. “Yes you! You think you can just go around bucking ponies, then come back here and act like nothing happened?” She asked me and I raised an eyebrow.

“Bucking ponies? I never bucked a pony… Twilight, what the hell has gotten into you?” I asked and she sucked back her tears.

“You and Cheerilee… you’re… you’re a couple now…” she said through a sniffle and I gave a rather distasteful look.

“Ech… no way. Hey listen, that mare is nice and kind and everything, but we didn’t have sex,” I began. She wiped some tears from her dampened face and I let out another tired sigh. In a perfect Terminator voice, I muttered out, “Now listen very carefully.” I had a straight Schwarzenegger face on. “And if you don’t understand something, then ask,” I told her then began my short story.

“Okay, starting off. I played hero man and saved Dash, in the process I got injured by Timberwolves, so I had to go to the hospital. Then they tried to give me a needle and I wouldn’t let them. So then a nurse gave me a potion that was supposed to be a tetanus. What she didn’t tell me was that the potion would give me a raging boner and near uncontrollable sexual urges. So all day Sunday I was running around trying to find a way to stop my urges and that’s when I figured I’d just jerk off in the back of my truck. But then I bumped into Cheerilee, who was in heat, and we masturbated together, nothing more, nothing less. We’re not in some sort of relationship, we just had a mutual masturbation session. Kind of weird, I know, but that’s all that happened,” I informed her.

She blinked briefly from all the information then spoke. “So you two aren’t… dating?” She asked and I shook my head. “And you didn’t have sex?” She asked, again I shook my head, replying that I hadn’t. “Why didn’t you tell me?!” She burst out. I scratched my head.

“Didn’t I… say that in the letter?” I asked. Twilight quickly pulled out my letter and reread it. An embarrassed look spread across her face and she looked over to me then leapt on me, hugging me tightly and crying into my shoulder.

“I’m sorry Evan. It’s just that I thought you were dating Cheerilee and I didn’t want to lose you,” she wept and I scratched my head.

“You’ll never lose me,” I replied casually and she tilted her head back from the hug.

“Really? You mean that?” She asked and I gave a half assed nod.

“Well duh. You’re my teacher, and kinda like my mom. It’s like a parent saying they’d lose their son to his girlfriend. Yeah, maybe he’d start hanging around the girlfriend more but, in the end, the parent is still the parent,” I told her. We both smiled at each other and I let out a yawn.

“Twilight… promise me something?” I asked.

“Anything,” she said in a hushed tone.

“Next time you’re all emotional because you think I might move out, just ask,” I told her. Her face went pale.

“You think I was crying because… I thought you might move out?” She asked and I nodded.

“Well yeah… I mean, that’s why you were crying right? All parents cry when their kid leaves the home. It’s like a bird leaving the nest. They never really come back, but they’re always around,” I stated. She sniffled for a few minutes then wiped the tears from her eyes.

“Evan… can I ask something of you?” She asked and I shrugged.

“Sure kid. Ask away,” I replied.

“Tomorrow, can we go see my parents?” She asked and I shrugged.

“Uhm sure. Now by tomorrow do you mean as in today, or tomorrow as in Wednesday?” I asked.

“What time is it?!” She gasped and I scratched my head.

“Probably about one in the morning. Your crying woke me up,” I informed her. A nervous blush came across her face. She once again embraced me in a motherly hug.

“Sorry about that… I love you Evan,” she whispered. I rubbed her head affectionately.

“Yeah… I love you too kid,” I replied. She looked up to me and her tears made her eyes gleam in the moonlight that protruded through the windows of the library.

“Really?” She asked, and I nodded hesitantly.

“Well yeah… I mean, a son is supposed to love his mom right?” I asked. She gently rested her head against my chest, breathing in a soft and relaxed way. I held her in my arms, rocking her body back and forth.

Soon I realized that Twilight had fallen asleep in my arms, now supported by only my body.

I gently lifted her up into my arms and walked her up to her room, then to her bed. I sat down on the bed, still cradling the sleeping alicorn in my arms.

“I’ll love you forever,
I’ll like you for always,
As long as I’m living,
My mommy you’ll be.”

I quietly whispered the words to a very sad verse from a very sad book. One which had always brought a tear to my eye as a child. As I remembered my own mother, whom I hadn’t seen in over half a year, a tear came to my eye.

I looked down to Twilight and thought about how much sadness she had been in recently because of my actions and lack of ability to explain them. ‘You’re an idiot.’ My conscience thought to me.

Tears sparkled into my vision and I clenched my eyes shut. Some of my tears fell down to Twilight and dampened her fur. “I’m sorry Twi…” I whispered, hating myself for the misery I had recently brought her. ‘Next time I’ll explain it in greater detail and make sure I really explain that I won’t leave her,’ I told myself.

As I continued to cradle her in my arms, my senses grew weak. My head began to bob and seemed to weigh a ton. My eyelids grew heavy and, ever so slowly, I fell asleep.

* * *

My sleep was dark, undisturbed and peaceful. I soon felt a tingly feeling throughout my right arm. I awoke with a dissatisfied groan, only to find Twilight passed out on top of me. Her mane was somewhat in my mouth and had a tangy sort of taste to it. I pulled my face away and mouthed my tongue around. It did taste better than morning breath, I'll admit that.

Part of her light frame was resting on my arm, cutting off some of the circulation and giving my arm a tingly sensation of numbness. I let out a tired groan and rubbed away the eye-snot from my eyelids.

“Mmm... Twilight…” I muttered groggily, but she was unresponsive. “Mmm… I’m hungry,” I mumbled to myself. I gently shuffled my body out from under her, only to find a large slick of drool on my bare chest.

My arm began to tingle more as blood flow returned. I stumbled my way down to the kitchen, only to find it void of any cereal. “Man… what a cock block,” I mused to myself as I realized there was no cereal.

Looking to the kitchen clock, I realized it was only 6:00am. “Nopony should be around town right now… maybe I can get me some cereal…” I mumbled.

Quickly slipping on my clean fatigues, my watch, my wallet, and my boots, I silently slipped out the front door and began making my way to the local grocery store. I soon had the irresistible urge to just start jogging, while I sang ‘What is love?’

My pace was more along a steady run rather than a jog, but it felt nice. The air was cool, the streets were still dim, and nopony was around.

As I past a gingerbread house, a stunning aroma caught my attention. It smelt like… “Mmm… I could use a cinnamon roll right about now…” I whispered to myself. I quickly approached the building which, to my somewhat decent knowledge, was some sort of small time bakery.

The sign on the door read ‘Open’, so I quickly scampered inside, only to be greeted by a pink pony with an absolutely ridiculous mane of hair. Her mane was also pink, albeit a darker shade, and was frazzled into a big puff.

“Uhm… hi,” I began, but no sooner had I started, she let out a tremendous gasp.

“Are you… Twilight’s new student?” she gasped and I nodded. “The one who never leaves the basement?” she asked in a squeaky tone. I rolled my eyes then nodded, figuring that was a pretty good statement. She let out a squealing gasp, so loud I thought she was about to explode, then disappeared into a fume of dust as she sped off.

I was left with my index finger up, trying to call her back. “Wait I… ca… I…” I stuttered. My head drooped down as I let out a depressed sigh. As I left my head drooped, my nose once again caught wind of the freshly baked cinnamon rolls. My nostrils seemed to naturally sniff like a dog, and my head perked up.

I followed the lingering smell. It only took a moment to find a fresh plate of them on the counter with a sign reading ‘Cinnamon rolls, 1 bit per roll.’

I pulled out twelve bits, the same amount to how many rolls were on the plate, grabbed the rolls, placed the bits on the plate, and then placed the rolls into a doggy bag before leaving.

“It’s not stealing if you paid for it,” I told myself as I quickly devoured one of the rolls. It tasted great. It wasn’t too sweet, but had enough taste to drive my taste buds wild, making me have a desire to scoff back another.

“Keep room for cereal Burdy, keep room for cereal,” I told myself as I consciously ate a second one.

I soon reached the grocery store, grabbed a shopping cart, and made my way through the automatic sliding doors. ‘Sliding doors… twenty first century…’ I thought to myself, making a mental note about yet another of the weird era pools this place had.

I placed my right foot at the base of the small shopping kart, obviously being made to accommodate ponies, not humans, and began to immaturely stroll around the store. Nopony was around to give me shit so I was free to do so.

“Wee… wee… WEE!” I squealed to myself as I began fucking around. I’d take corners at increasingly higher speeds. The wheels on the kart would grind and squeak in retort as I’d skid around corners, sometimes bringing the kart onto two wheels.

“And Burdy takes the lead, he’s heading down the straightaway at two hundred miles per hour!” I said in an announcer voice, foolishly pretending that I was a NASCAR driver. I began making silly race car noises as I sped along at an audacious speed.
I rounded the final corner and, “LOOKOUT!” I heard a voice scream in panic. I turned to see Derpy traveling on a shopping kart in a similar fashion that I was, except not as stupidly fast.

Her kart T-boned mine and I careened into a shelf. My empty cart went sprawling, but the shelf of items came crashing down on me. “OHH SHIT!” I yelled, but was too off balanced to react properly.

I landed face first into the tiled floor as the shelf collapsed on my back. Jars, bottles, and the shelve itself, crashed down onto my body.

A minor pain seared through my body and I heard Derpy screaming for somepony to get help. I squirmed my top section out from underneath and I heard Derpy scream in absolute fear. “Oh my gosh… EVAN! SOMEONE CALL AN AMBULANCE.”

That’s when I noticed a red fluid trailing down my face, along with it staining my entire set of clothes. More of the fluid trailed out from under me, making a pool underneath my body. Derpy rushed to my side, breathing frantically.

“Evan… oh please don’t do this… please, please, pleasepleaseplease…” she began to tear up as she tried to cradle me. I gave one clean stroke of my hand down my face then licked the fluid.

It had a bitter taste to it that made me gag in disgust. Derpy squeezed me tighter. “Oh please Celestia, I didn’t mean to,” Derpy cried.

“Oh chill out Derpy. I’m sure their insurance will cover it,” I chuckled then held out my tongue and tried to spit out the nasty taste in my mouth. As I spit the bitter taste out of my mouth, some of the fluid spat out with my saliva.

“Evan… oh please forgive me… I didn’t mean to. I was just…” she began to weep into my shoulder.

“What?” I asked casually. She whipped her head back from my shoulder, tears strolling down her cheeks and dampening her fur, along with my shoulder.

“You… you’re going to die… and it’s all my fault!” she cried out and I scrunched my nose.

“What?! No I’m not,” I said casually as I quickly squirmed out from underneath the shelf and brushed off the sticky wetness of the fluid. She just stayed sitting, looking at me with disbelief.

“But… but you were bleeding… and coughing up blood…” she stated in an astounded voice.

“Uhh no… that’s tomato juice. I thought it was something like fruit punch, but when I tasted the tomato juice, I gagged from the awful taste of it,” I informed her. She just blinked, still completely stunned that I wasn’t dying.

In a brief moment, she lept up and squeezed me tightly, the hug almost hurting more than the shelf collapsing on me. “Oh Evan… please don’t scare me like that again,” she wept.

I rolled my eyes and returned the hug, though not as tightly as she was squeezing me. After a moment, we broke from the hug and I gave her a nod. There was a message that played on the microphone speakers.

“CLEAN UP ON AISLE FIVE PLEASE,” it spoke out loudly. I gulped then looked to Derpy.

“We better skedaddle. I think we’d be in a lot of trouble if they found us like this.” I laughed. We both quickly grabbed our shopping carts and sped off, quickly resorting to playing race karts.

We immaturely sped down aisles like race car drivers. Every so often one of us would take the lead and pretend to be the announcer. We sped around corners, sometimes knocking things off shelves, laughing all the while, until we finally stopped to catch a breather. I looked to Derpy as she panted heavily. “AND THE WINNER!” I announced as I grabbed Derpy’s right hoof then held it in the air.

Derpy giggled as I released her hoof and gave her a nudge. “See yah around Derpy,” I told her. She nodded and we parted ways. I quickly moved to the cereal section and grabbed some sweet cereal labelled ‘Fruity Hoops’. It had some sort of scorpion-tailed, bat-winged lion as the mascot. It was doing a slam dunk through what looked to be an enlarged Fruit Loop.

“Fucking knockoffs…” I muttered. I then realized that, in this world, Fruit Loops probably didn’t exist. I grabbed several boxes of ‘Fruity Hoops’ and placed them in my cart before making my way to the checkout.

I reached for my bag of cinnamon rolls, only to realize that they had all been squashed into a nasty mush of cinnamon roll goo. “Goddammit,” I swore.

I picked out mushy pieces of what used to be cinnamon rolls and took a bite, but the tomato juice had seeped through and tainted the former goodness of the cinnamon rolls. “WOW…” I said in an unimpressed voice, “What a cock block,” I swore again.

I reached the checkout and paid for several boxes of cereal. “Sixteen bits later and I got me four boxes a’ Fruit Loops… err Fruity Hoops,” I chuckled then looked at the box cover. The scorpion lion thing had a stupid smile on his face with a caption reading ‘THEY’RE SUPERB!’

I slapped my forehead from the absolutely retarded catchphrase. As I left the grocery store, I tossed the bag of mushy cinnamon rolls into a trash can, left the shopping cart behind, and scooted back to Twilight’s library.

‘I need me some mother fuckin’ cereal bitches!’ I thought to myself with an undying smirk that sprawled across my face.

I reached for the doorknob and found it to be locked. “Gah… what the fuck?!” I hissed to myself. Twilight never locks the front door.

Quickly scurrying around back, I broke into the residence by the basement window. I kicked off my stained clothes, replaced them with a pair of blue jeans and white t-shirt, and then raced upstairs, not even bothering to put on some socks.

I skidded my feet across the wooden floor leading into the living room, and a thumb tack stabbed into my foot. “Shit!” I hissed, not bothering to look. I rushed to the table and set the boxes of cereal on the kitchen table.

The bowls were out, the milk poured, and my cereal was ready before I could even manage to sputter another word, and then it hit me; there was a slight pain at the base of my foot.

I hefted my right leg up and across my left and then examined my foot. The thumb tack was lodged into my foot and the needle looked to be a bit bent, probably due to me skidding over it and rushing about like I was.
“Well… at least the top doesn’t have a grip,” I muttered to myself. The top was a simple bronze plate, meant not to have a grip and rather be pushed into a wall by hoof and left there, only to be removed with something like a knife.

I slide my finger and thumb nail between my skin and the tack head then pulled it out. A small stream of blood oozed out. I grabbed some paper towels from off the table and set them on the floor, placing my foot on top of them so I wouldn’t have to clean the mess afterwards.

My first spoonful hadn’t even entered my mouth when Spike moseyed into the kitchen, still wiping his eyes in a daze of sleepiness. “Morning kid,” I said before placing a spoonful of the tasty cereal in my mouth.

Spike murmured something before taking his hands away from his face. He looked to me, then to the cereal. “OH HEY WOW! You got Fruity Hoops! Can I have some?!” He squeaked in excitement.

I looked blankly to the boxes of cereal, a spoonful of cereal still in my mouth, then back to him before shrugging. I grabbed one of the boxes and tossed it to him. “Knock yourself out.” I mused.

His faced seemed to gleam with happiness as he caught the box and began pouring himself a bowl. “So…” he trailed off through a mouthful of cereal. “How was your morning?” he asked and I shrugged.

“Meh… I bought a bunch of cinnamon rolls at Sugarcube Corner this morning… but they all got crushed when Derpy and I collided at the grocery mart,” I snickered as I remembered how she thought I was dying. “And tomato juice spilt all over me. Derpy thought I was dying and nearly had a panic attack. She thought it was all her fault and was praying to Celestia that I wouldn’t die,” I mused.

A voice perked up from behind me, “That’s not that funny,” Twilight responded and I let out a sigh. ‘Figures she’d come in and ruin my story.’

“Well sure it is. We both laughed afterwards and she got over it. Come on Twilight, you should know that a shelf of food collapsing on me isn’t gonna kill me,” I chuckled. She sat next to me and shook her head in a disappointed fashion as she picked up the cereal box and observed the nutritional data.

“You guys shouldn’t be eating this. It’s not good for your health,” she warned. I poured myself a second bowl, ignoring her words of warning. Twilight rolled her eyes and she too poured herself a bowl.

“That stuff isn’t good for you yah know,” I mocked her, resulting with her shooting me a playful glare. “I’m just saying,” I laughed. I brushed aside the hair in front of my face then let out a sigh.

“So Evan…” Twilight stopped for a moment and looked to me, mouthing the cereal around inside her mouth. I nodded silently and she continued, “When do you want to go with me to see my parents?” she asked.

“Oh shit…” I swore, having completely forgotten that I agreed to go with her to see her parents. I looked to Spike and shrugged. “Sorry, it slipped,” I apologized for my rude language then scratched my chin.

“Well…” I began. “I’m not really one for looking fancy but…” I trailed off as I begrudgingly muttered out the last part. “I think I need to get a haircut and shave to look presentable,” I told her and she raised an eyebrow.

“You… YOU, want to look presentable? You of all ponies,” she laughed, knowing I wasn’t much to dress up for these sorts of things. I rolled my eyes and bobbed my head back and forth.

“Yeah, yeah… I just need a haircut is all,” I replied. She chuckled to herself, amused at the fact that I wanted to look nice.

I quickly finished my breakfast then moved to the sink. “You know what they say…” I trailed off as I washed the bowl in the sink.

“No. What do they say?” Twilight asked, still munching on the cereal that was ‘bad for us’.

“Somepony’s first impressions are made within the first five to seven seconds of meeting you, based off looks entirely,” I informed her and she giggled.

“Oh great. Let me guess? You’ve been hanging around Rarity lately, haven’t you?” she asked. I shuddered from the memory of our brief encounter. It being the only encounter, I didn’t exactly have fond memories of her.

“Yeah… hey, is there a barber in town?” I asked and Twilight stirred around the final bits that still lingered in the bowl of milk.

“Well… I’m sure Rarity would do it, seeing as how you’re ‘such good friends,’” she told me with a smile, putting extreme emphasis on the term. I was about to write off the very idea, but then realized it might be a good way to make amends, or in this case, have a proper introduction.

A deep exhale left my mouth and I nodded. “Yeah… that might work,” I replied, turning and moseying down to my room. I had no idea how I was going to approach this, ‘Hey Rarity, nice to see you again.’ The thought lingered in my mind the whole time while I slipped on my socks and boots.

I sucked in a deep breath, then exhaled. “Okay Burdy…” I was cut off by a tugging at my pant leg. I looked down to see Spike there, a needy look on his face.

“Can I come with you? Please? Pretty please? Pretty please with a cherry on top?” he pleaded. I scratched my head and pondered the idea. It would indeed make this entire situation a lot easier with a youngling there.

“Sure,” I told him with a smile. ‘Things might have just gotten easier.’

* * *

The door swung open and we were greeted by the white unicorn with the dazzling purple mane. “Why hello Spike, and hello…” her smile quickly died off and she gulped. Seeing me must’ve obviously brought up some memories neither of us were very happy about.

I faintly waved my hand. “Uhm… Hey Rarity… Supp?” I asked, feeling like a complete dork. Her cheeks burned red with either a blush of timidness, or anger. I was praying it was the earlier of the list.

“I… I… please, come in,” she welcomed us into her shop gracefully. I still wasn’t sure whether she was mad about me coming being here, or completely embarrassed. She looked to Spike, then to me. “Spike, could you be a dear and fetch me a glass of water… with ice please?” she asked in a sultry voice.

Spike seemed to get googly eyed and floated off, almost as if in his own little world. We both watched him walk into the kitchen. As soon as he was out of sight, our glances moved to each other. She was the first to speak.

“Darling listen… about the other day, I…” she trailed off as she began to think about the proper way to approach this.

“I’m sorry,” I apologized and she looked up to me with a shocked look. I rolled my eyes and looked away with an embarrassed look. “The nurse at the hospital gave me a funky potion that gave me a ridiculous boner that wouldn’t go away. I should’ve gotten Twilight to pick up my clothes,” I informed her. “So… I’m sorry.”

It took a moment for it to register in her thoughts before she let out a sigh. “And I’m sorry too darling. In the midst of everything I was just trying to cover it up. I didn’t mean to do that,” she apologized and I nodded.

“No biggy. Oh actually… I have one question?” I asked and she raised an eyebrow. “Was I really that good looking?” I asked, getting a little boastful due to the fact she had quickly rushed to the shower right after seeing me nude.

She blushed furiously. “Darling…” she trailed off as she tried to think of an excuse. I fist pumped as I let out a silent cheer. She gave me a weird look.

“Nothing. Just a personal score for me,” I informed her. She rolled her eyes.

“Boastfulness is unattractive. Your body is… different, but very appealing due to your… stunning physique,” she expressed her feelings in a true nature.

“Meh, don’t fret. I’m not really boastful, I just thought it was cool that someone as beautiful as you thought I was… sexy!” To the final comment she blushed a bit, then I remembered the real reason I had come here. “So, that put aside, I need to ask a favor of you. If you wouldn’t mind.”

She raised a curious eyebrow, wondering what I could possibly want. I tuffed my hair and swayed it around. “You think by chance you could give me a haircut? And a shave?” I asked casually. She stood there for a moment, still not exactly sure if I was serious or just dicking around.

“Really?” she asked and I nodded. “You’re not joking?” I shook my head. “Darling, you don’t seriously want to get rid of that beautiful mane of yours.”

The final statement forced me to stifle a laugh. “For one: it’s not a mane, it’s hair. And secondly: yes, I do want it gone. It’s too long,” I informed her.

“Why not go to a barber? There’s one in Ponyville,” she stated and I shrugged.

“I just figured I’d come here. The way you can weave dresses and such, I figured you’d be just as good with cutting hair… that and I wanted to clear everything that happened and make sure we saw eye to eye,” I informed her.

A voice called out from the kitchen. “Rarity, where’s the ice?” Spike called out.

“In the freezer darling,” Rarity called back in her calm and nearly royal like voice. Looking back to me, she pulled up a seat and some sort of black looking bib.

I sat down on the chair and she wrapped the bib around my neck. “Okay darling, how do you want it?” she asked in a hushed tone while she placed a small mirror in front of me.

“Three on the top, one on the sides, please,” I replied. There was a moment’s pause and then a click. I looked through the mirror to see her fidgeting with the hair buzzer.

“Okay dear, try to hold still,” she ordered me, though her voice made it sound like more of a pleading request. Gosh, a stallion might fight to the death just to hear her speak.

I heard the buzzer flick on and hum, just inches behind my neck. The hairs along my spine prickled up and a shiver went down my back. The buzzer neared my neck and, just as the blades began to cut my hair, my back naturally arched.

I heard Rarity gasp as she pulled the razor back. “Oh Celestia! I didn’t hurt you did I?” she asked fearfully. I shook my head and sighed.

“Sorry about that. I have a nervous twitch with buzzers. Just whenever they get near the back of my neck it sends a tingly feeling down my spine,” I replied. A second shiver went down my back and I gave a powerful roll of my shoulders, sending a third and final shiver down my back.

I let out a deep exhale then nodded. “Okay… I’ll try to keep still,” I told her. As she once again began to cut the hair around the back of my neck, tingly feelings shivered down my back, but I resisted the urge to arch my back.

Spike came rushing into the living room, or whatever this room was, and handed Rarity the drink. “Thank you dear,” she thanked him as she set the glass aside, continuing to cut my hair carefully.

I glanced over to Spike, only to realize that he had a dreamy look on his face while he was staring at me. ‘What the fuck? Spike’s not gay… is he?’ I thought to myself. ‘Oh please god, don’t let Spike be gay for me,’ I prayed silently.

Almost as if a brick wall hit me, I realized something. The stunning beauty that was cutting my hair was directly behind me. Perhaps Spike was staring dreamily at Rarity. Yeah, that must’ve been it, there’s no way Spike’s gay.

Before I could finish my thoughts, Rarity began to spray my head with some sort of squirt bottle that misted water fumes onto my hair. She then began to use a hairdryer to dry it up. As she continued on, I realized this was turning into more of a perm than a haircut.

She finished by tuffing my hair with her hooves before nodding. “There darling, what do you think?” she asked. Before I could answer, Spike spoke up.

“Perfect,” he replied in a still dazed voice. She partly ignored his comment and leaned on my shoulder as we both looked into the mirror.

I brushed my hair. Somehow she had made it into more of a flattop haircut, making me have a Schwarzenegger appearance. “Do you like it darling?” she asked hopefully.

I shook my head as I continued to stroke my hair. “No… I don’t like it,” I said truthfully and she gasped. I stood up, discarding the bib, and looked to her. I grabbed her and brought her into a hug. “I friggin love it!” I said in a bubbly voice.

“You… you love it?” she asked and I stood back from the hug.

“Uhh yeah! Hello? Equestria to Rarity, this is like… the coolest haircut ever! It’s probably the best haircut ever given in the history of Equestria,” I told her. Her face slowly crept into a bigger smile and she leapt on me, hugging me tightly.

“Oh thank you darling,” she thanked me for… well, I wasn’t sure why she was thanking me. She dropped back down to all fours and took a breath of air. “Not many ponies thank me for my work, and when they do, it usually isn’t to that extent,” she informed me.

Without warning, she reached forwards and brushed some hair off my shoulder. “You should probably take a shower. You remember where it is?” she asked and I nodded. Looking over, she levitated over the glass of water that Spike had brought her. “And thank you Spike. You’re such a dear,” she said in a very illustrious voice.

As I made my way up the stairs, I swore that I heard Spike’s body hit the floor with a thump. I looked back to see that he had fallen unconscious. I rolled my eyes and shrugged as I continued towards the washroom.

It didn’t surprise me that the washroom was the same as the last time I was here. It was nice because now I knew exactly where the towels were. Again I was stuck with a frilly towel that had probably cost a hefty bit.

I slipped into the shower and fiddled with the nozzles, and that’s when I noticed it. The dildo was gone. Not that it was any of my business, but I did notice that it was no longer present.

I put myself in a bit of a rush, washing off as quickly as I could, using a fruity smelling shampoo to wash myself down, and finally turning off the shower before drying off. The towel felt nice, that was for sure. The purple towel felt more like a very absorbent silk, yet somehow it retained a dry feeling the whole time I dried myself off.

Putting on my clothes, which were still technically clean since I had only worn them for part of the morning, I tossed the towel over my shoulder and proceeded downstairs. As I reached the living room, I looked to see Spike ogling over Rarity, who wasn’t paying much attention to his advances. ‘Poor guy,’ I thought silently.

“Hey Rarity?” I asked and she quickly looked over. “Where do you want this towel?” I asked. She pulled it from my grip with her magic and placed it over on a drying rack. Our smiles met and I gave her a nod. “Well, thanks for the haircut Rarity,” I thanked her as I placed thirty bits on the table.

“What’s this? Oh darling, you don’t have to pay me,” she gasped and I shrugged.

“Sure I do. Services rendered. And besides, it’s the best damn haircut I’ve ever had… ever,” I informed her. She smiled brightly and I swear I almost spotted a tear trickle down her face. I nudged Spike with my knee, snapping him back to reality. “Come on Spike, we should go home,” I told him.

* * *

An hour later…

My truck held a steady pace heading up the mountain trail. I smirked as I looked to the bull horns that protruded from the top of the hood. The tires gripped the mountain trail rather well and it was easy to handle the truck up the incline.

This was probably the first time Twilight had actually came for a ride with me. Though she had inspected the insides before, she had never actually come with me, and neither had Spike.

Spike sat in the passenger seat while Twilight lay across the entire back seat. “You know… I think Rarity has had a massive impact on both your lives,” Twilight giggled, making Spike blush while I simply groaned and rolled my eyes.

I reached my right hand down and felt the fabrics of my dark brown trench coat, made of synthetic wool. I hadn’t worn this that much, and was somewhat lucky that it had been lingering around in my truck when I was transported to Equestria. I thought to myself about everything. At first I had thought it was the worst possible thing: freakishly friendly multi-colored ponies with magic, mythical creatures, all that kinda stuff. But I suppose I was rather lucky. I had a duffle bag of clothes, my old cowboy hat, my truck, a few of my guns and ammo. I suppose that things could be worse.

I had changed into a light brown pair of trousers with a bright white V-neck t-shirt. My black watch was latched around my wrist and I had my Christian cross necklace dangling underneath my t-shirt. The necklace was a silver metal substance, though I wasn’t sure if it was actual silver or just some knockoff.

My wedding ring felt a tad bit loose on my ring finger, but it didn’t bother me that much. “You know Evan, I’m not sure how my parents will feel about us being together,” she teased.

“Oh come on Twilight. It’s not like we’re dating. You’re just my teacher. They shouldn’t be all that freaked out… right?” I asked hesitantly.

“Ohh… I don’t know. My dad was always ‘really’ protective,” she replied. I groaned, thinking about just how much of a bad idea this might be. She gave me a nudge to the back of my shoulder. “Don’t worry, my family is pretty lenient to stallions being in my life,” she told me.

“Well, if they aren’t all that accepting about it, why’d you take me as your faithful student?” I asked curiously, still fretting about this whole idea. She simply blushed then sat back in her seat.

The truck rumbled onto the streets of Canterlot and Twilight directed me around to her parent’s place.

‘Man… Canterlot is really high class,’ I thought to myself. The streets looked to be made of cobblestone and the ponies were all ritzy looking. Now that I think about it, minus a select few, most ponies never really wore clothes, but most all the ponies in Canterlot had some fancy smancy dress or tuxedo on.

Though despite most of Canterlot being really swanky and high-class, her parent’s place looked a little more middle-class. ‘Whew, at least they’re not a bunch of ritzy bastards,’ I thought to myself.

Spike easily opened the doors, guess hands do come in handy. The three of us stepped out and that’s when I realized it. Everypony in the streets were staring at me. I was severely out of place here, not just my clothes, but my very existence in this place.

I paced to the back of my truck and opened one of the toolboxes. I grabbed the case labelled ‘Heather’ and pulled it out. Inside was a Norinco 870 clone, with a fourteen inch barrel. Although I wasn’t much of a Chinese-pro gun guy, I did like a few of the models they offered, though this was the only Norinco I owned.

I slipped three 2¾ inch shells into the tubular magazine, but left the gun chamber unloaded. I slung it across my back, barrel facing downwards. The trench coat flaps did decently well to conceal the firearm, though most wouldn’t even know what it was.

I closed the toolbox and made my way towards the passenger side, where Twilight and Spike were waiting. Twilight gave me a nod which I returned before all three of us proceeded up the front steps of the house.

Twilight used her magic to knock with the little door knocker thing that was hanging from a hinge. ‘Point goes to Victorian age,’ I thought to myself. The hinge looked like that of a lion head, while the little knocker piece looked like reins for a horse.

The door opened and a grey mare answered. She had a purple and white streaked mane along with medium blue eyes. She stood for a moment before gasping. “Twilight… Spike!” she whispered in a hushed tone, completely shocked to see them.

Twilight grabbed, whom I presumed to be her mom, and held her tightly. “Hello mom. Sorry that it’s been so long since I visited. It’s just that I’ve been busy,” she explained. A blue stallion entered the doorway and Twilight grabbed him as well, taking him off guard while a shocked look sprawled across his face.

“Twilight, how have you been?” asked the stallion as he returned the hug. Spike and I just stood in the doorway. The trio of family members conversed briefly before the stallion looked to me with his amber coloured eyes.

“And whom might you be?” he asked.

“I’m Princess Twilight’s personal bodyguard,” I replied in a deep voice, making the lie completely believable. Twilight gave me a brief nudge to the leg.

“This is Evan. He’s my faithful student,” Twilight truthfully informed her parents.

“I’m like an unpaid mercenary for her,” I joked, again resulting with a nudge to my leg. The two parents looked up at me, wandering looks covered my body as they observed my framework.

“Indeed, well please come in,” Twilight’s mother offered. We all entered and sat by the living room table. This place reminded me more of a 50’s home; furnished wood, classy furniture, an old radio on a stand, those kinds of things.

Twilight and her parents began conversing about all the things that have been happening recently. Her dad kept asking questions about me, all the while I kept quiet and left Twilight to do all the talking.

He seemed reasonably impressed, though didn’t show it much. Soon enough, Twilight and her mom got up and walked into the kitchen with Spike, leaving her dad and I all alone.

“So… Mr.?” I asked, hoping to get his name.

“Sparkle. Mr. Sparkle,” he replied.

“No first name?” I asked, and he shook his head.

“You’ll call me Mr. Sparkle, if you plan on being with my daughter,” he replied and I chuckled.

“Woah! Hold up now, hit the brakes. Nopony said nothin’ about us being together. She’s my teacher and is becoming more like my mom. She’s not… well, you know. We’re not… together,” I laughed. He leaned forwards with a stern look and I gulped, this was going bad fast.

* * *

In the kitchen, third person perspective:

Twilight looked to her mother who sat across from her. “Mom?” she asked and her mother nodded. “How did you catch dad’s attention?” she asked, wondering just how exactly she made her father fall in love with her.

“Easy,” her mother began. “I simply asked him to be my special somepony,” she informed her daughter. Twilight was taken aback by the comment. Twilight’s mother rested a hoof on her still young daughter. “Honey, you must learn that sometimes a stallion may love you back, but he is too shy to admit it. So you must be the one to take the first step,” her mother informed her.

“So how did you do it?” Twilight asked and her mother simply shrugged.

“In high school, your father was on the chess club and I was a cheerleader,” she informed her daughter. “As the school prom neared, everypony on the cheer-leading team got a very special somepony to go to the prom with, but me… well…” she trailed off and looked to the ceiling, just as a tear dribbled from her face.

She looked back down to her daughter and smiled. “Well, needless to say I wasn’t big on the whole self-esteem thing, so I was a little more than shy. Your father and I were relatively good friends and I went to ask him what I should do. He seemed rather shy about the entire topic and couldn’t keep a straight sentence going. He could generally speak with ease, I knew it because I had heard him talk with friends in the hallways before. It was then I realized that he might have a harboring crush on me, so I took the first step and asked him to be my special somepony for the prom,” she finished with a smile.

“So…” Twilight trailed off and let out a defeated exhale. “How do I know if somepony likes me or not?” she asked and her mother shrugged.

“You might never really know. Sometimes you might just have to take that leap of faith. Just remember not to push it on them,” her mother informed Twilight, who in turn nodded.

All the while, Spike just sat at the table, scoffing back treats that Twilight’s mother had brought out, not even remotely interested in their conversation.

* * *

Back in the living room, Evan’s perspective:

“And I’m telling you, we’re not dating, and never will be. It’s not like that between us,” I tried to argue quietly. He let out an irritated scowl.

“I know my daughter well, and I see how she looks to you. I don’t care whether you love her or not, don’t hurt my daughter’s feelings,” he warned.

“I don’t plan to. Just stop acting like the two of us are in love,” I responded. He flopped back in his chair and let out a disgruntled sigh.

“You are so dense! You can’t see the loving mare right in front of you,” he told me and I raised an eyebrow.

“You’re a mare?” I asked and he again let out an irritated grunt. He tossed his hooves into the air in absolute defeat.

“You are truly lost if you can’t see my daughter’s advances towards you. She loves you, I know it,” he scolded me.

I rolled my eyes. “Of course she loves me. A parent is supposed to love their kid,” I replied and again he threw his hooves into the air.

“Can you stop being so dense for just one moment and think about it?” he asked. I thought about it and, like always, she just seemed like a motherly loving figure.

“She’s my mom… oh wait, I know why you don’t like how this is going,” I stated and he raised an eyebrow. “You don’t want a grandchild because you’ll feel old,” I spoke my thoughts and her father facehoofed.

“Oh for the love of… you’re worse than I was,” he began. ‘Oh goodie, story time,’ I thought.

“When I was in high school I was on the chess club,” he began, but I interrupted him.

“Were you good?” I asked and he nodded. “Like, really good?” I asked and he sighed.

“I won the Canterlot championship. Now back on topic, when I was in high school,” but again I interrupted him.

“Were you popular?” I asked and he rolled his eyes.

“Can you just let me continue?” he asked.

“So I take it you weren’t popular. You should’ve started with, ‘In high school I wasn’t popular.’” I told him. He facehoofed and let out an irritated groan.

“Like I was saying… in high school I was on the chess club, and yes, I wasn’t the most talked about colt in school. Every mare had her eyes on the star hoofball players, or the basketball players, or really any of the sport team players who had a good physique. Nopony really cared about the chess club,” he continued his story. “Twilight’s mother was one of the mares on the cheerleading team. Every stallion knew her, maybe not by name, but they knew her by her looks,” he informed me.

I scratched my chin as he continued his story. “Anyway, her and I… we were good friends, but I could never muster up the courage to ask her out. I knew she was WAY out of my league. And then came the high school prom…” he trailed off and let out a deep exhale.

“Is that the end of the story?” I asked and he shot me a glare. “What? It sounded like you ended the story there,” I stated.

He rolled his eyes then continued. “Anyway, she came to me and asked for my opinion about what she should do. I was so choked up about it, I wanted to say ‘Take me, I’ll be your special somepony.’ But I knew that I never stood a chance. I kept trying to name off stallions who might take her, but every name I offered just made my heart lurch for her more and more…” he trailed off and I raised an eyebrow.

“So you asked her out?” I asked and he shook his head. “So you didn’t ask her out. So how the hell did you two end up together?” I asked and he sighed.

“Luckily she was a bit more courageous than I was. She asked me out, right then and there. We went to the prom as a couple, and although we didn’t win the prom king and queen, we were already deeply in love,” he told me.

I scratched my head. “Okay… so what was the moral of that story and how does it apply to me?” I asked and his head drooped.

“What I’m trying to say is that maybe Twilight is in love with you, she is just too shy to say so,” he told me. I let out a sigh.

“Okay, for the last time, we don’t love each other. She’s a princess, and partially my mom, and I’m just a guy from another planet… another universe. She obviously doesn’t see me that way and could have any stallion she wanted,” I countered.

He smiled. “My colt, sometimes you’ll learn that a mare’s heart is truly mysterious. And it’s not something to tamper with. All I ask is that you don’t hurt my daughter’s feelings,” he told me. I nodded and he smiled. “Thanks, I was hoping you’d agree…” he trailed off and let out a nervous chuckle. “There’s not much point to me threatening you is there?” he laughed. I joined in and we shared a joke or two before Twilight entered the room with her mother and Spike.

We all sat and conversed for the next few hours and, before I knew it, it was time for Twilight, Spike, and myself to depart. We gave a farewell and, just before I left, Twilight’s father grabbed me. I looked to him and he pulled my head down so he could whisper in my ear. “Just remember, don’t hurt my daughter’s feelings, or else,” he whispered.

I stood up and nodded. “Trust me sir, we’re not in love, probably never will be… at least not in the way you’re thinking. But I’ll remember that,” I told him and he nodded. I gave one last nod before proceeding to the back of my truck, unloading my shotgun and putting it away.

I stepped into my truck and started it. This time Twilight was in the passenger seat and Spike was in the back. “Looks like you and my father get along really well,” Twilight mused and I nodded.

In my best Schwarzenegger voice I responded, “Oh yeah, we get along like ol’ frien’s.”

Author's Note

I went to Wendy's last night, got my dog a chicken burger and she liked it. Then I shared my frosty with her (And yes, with the same spoon, they only give you one in the drivethru) I was like "Some for you (give her a spoonful) some for me (Eat a spoonful) some for you (Give her a spoonful) and some for me..." yeah anyway, it was kind of funny because she'd like the underside of the spoon as well, then when it was my turn she'd be like "Hey, what gives, yer hoggin all the icecream man!"

Chapter 8

‘I want a puppy…’

The truck slowly pulled up to the library. It was getting pretty late, 9:38pm to be exact. Spike was passed out, but Twilight was still up, although she had the seat divider flipped up and was resting against my side.

I turned off the truck and killed the headlights, only to realize that the bathroom light inside the library was on. “Twi?” I whispered. She gave a quiet ‘Hmm’ for her reply. “Did you leave the bathroom light on?” I asked. I felt her head gently move side to side, telling me that she hadn’t.

“Stay here,” I told her, though there wasn’t much argument because, by the time I left the truck, she passed out on the front seat. The library was deathly silent along with the surroundings. This just wasn’t right.

I went to the back of my truck and once again unveiled the Norinco 870 shotgun. I grabbed three 3 inch magnum rounds, loading two into the tubular magazine and one in the chamber.

I silently walked across the lawn, my trench coat fluttering about in the night wind. For whatever reason, the street lamps were very dim and the moon was equal in terms of light. The whole scenario gave the world an eerie look.

I leaned against the wall beside the door and silently twisted the door knob. With the knob fully twisted, I gave a small and gentle push. I immediately felt a wire attached to the door handle inside and stopped my sluggish entry.

Silently closing the door, I crouched down and made my way around back. Luckily the basement window was open. Whoever these burglars were, they were good, but not perfect.

I crept into my room, which was pitch black. It took a moment for my eyes to partly adjust and I gauged were everything was. As I crept along through the darkness, I’d use my shotgun to poke sometimes, using it like a blind man’s cane.

I finally managed to find the stairs, but every step I took sounded like an ear piercing squeak. ‘God, I never knew these stairs were so squeaky…’ I thought to myself. I tried painfully to be as quiet as I could, but with everything so silent, each step sounded like the equivalent of a crack of lightning in a thunder storm.

I lost track of the amount of stairs I had climbed and accidentally bumped into the door. “Shit…” I whispered under my breath. Pressing my ear to the door, I listened for noises on the other side.

My heartbeat echoed in my head, making it difficult to hear. “Okay… easy now Burdy,” I whispered to myself. Taking a step back, I arched my foot back to boot down the door, then quickly realized how irrational that was.

“Easy does it Burdy…” I whispered. I opened the door with a gentle and slow pace. I took a peek into the library, but it was equally as dim as the basement had been.

My senses picked up a presence just past the door. I opened the door just enough to slip through before approaching the intruder. ‘Steady now… steady…’ Ever so slowly, and almost naturally, my left hand reached forwards, while my right held my shotgun.

In a flash of motion, I snapped my left hand around the culprit’s mouth and pulled him back. I pressed the shotgun up against his back, but kept my finger off the trigger. “Now listen here you piece of scumbag shit,” I hissed in a whispering voice. “My 12 guage will splatter your guts all over this library unless you play your cards right… got that?” I snarled.

I heard a very faint and absolutely petrified whimpering come from the culprit, whom I now had reason to believe was female. “Sssh… shut the fuck up!” I hissed a little louder.

Before I could react, every light in the home lit up, blinding me and sending my senses wild. ‘AMATEUR… YOU FUCKING AMATEUR BURDY!’ I silently yelled at myself as I raised my shotgun to shoulder level.

“SURPRISE!” yelled a unison chorus.

There were… party noises? The sound of confetti exploding into the air along with squeaking balloons filled the atmosphere. My vision quickly adapted to the blinding light and I saw… just about everypony from Ponyville.

In front of me, on all four of her knees, was a whimpering pale yellow pegasus. “What the…” I trailed off in complete confusion about what the hell was going on.

The pink mare whom I had met this morning at the bakery bounced around playfully. I let go of the whimpering pegasus and lowered my shotgun. “The hell is this?” I muttered.

“Well duh silly, it’s your party!” Squealed the frilly pink mare.

“For what?” I asked. It was nowhere close to my birthday. The pink mare slapped herself in the forehead like my question was dumb.

“HELLO? It’s your arrival party. The party everyone gets when they arrive in Ponyville. I’ve just had a hard time setting it up because you were always in the basement, but when you finally left the house, I had time to…” She took in a deep breath and I swear she was about to explode.

“SET YOU UP THE MOST AWESOMEST PARTY EVER!” She squealed in absolute delight.

My thoughts finally came to and I realized I was in no real danger… well maybe sleep deprivation.

My eyes felt heavy and my body felt drowsy. The effort I had put into sneaking in had really zapped up the rest of my energy. “I’ll be back,” I muttered groggily as I began to walk for the door, nearly tripping over the still whimpering pegasus.

I smirked and gave her a pat on the shoulder. “Next time, don’t sneak up on me.” I gave a smirk and a brief chuckle.

No sooner had I left, the entire library was filled with the sound of socializing and partying ponies. “Oh for the love of god… first Twilight crying, now ponies having a party,” I let out a deep exhale. “I’ll never get any sleep.”

I retrieved both Spike and Twilight from my truck. Twilight luckily awoke when I nudged her, but Spike was out cold. I flipped his body onto my shoulder and proceeded back inside.

Thankfully, most of the ponies seemed not to care about my presence anymore, having already surprised me. Rather than try to socialize with me, they just stood around and mingled about carelessly.

I gave Spike to Twilight who brought him upstairs and I myself began to walk towards the basement door. Right before I could open the door however, a playful dog slid in front of my legs and pawed at my knees.

“Winona, down,” I heard Applejack’s voice shoot across the room and the dog immediately ceased her playfulness.

“Aww… it’s okay pup,” I said in a tired voice. I took a knee and scratched behind the dog’s ears. The dog was pretty small, only measuring up to my knees while she stood on all fours, but regardless, it was cute.

“Didn’t know yah had a lovin’ side,” Applejack teased from behind me, with a somewhat taunting tone.

“Oh, course I do,” I said with a smile, not looking back to her. “I just don’t show it much is all,” I replied as I continued to rub the dog’s head. I began to make bubbly baby noises as I played with the dog. “Oooh, who’s a good dog? You’re a good dog. Oh yeah, yeah, you’re such a good dog… ooh, who likes a scratch behind the ears? You do? Oh yes you do,” I continued massaging the dog’s head and it suddenly flipped onto its back, demanding a belly rub.

“Now ah’ll be,” Applejack said in a stunned voice, “Ah ain’t never seen Winona get so friendly that fast. She never lets strangers rub ‘er belly,” Applejack stated and I shrugged.

“Strangers probably don’t know how to make her happy… least that’s what ah reckon anyway,” I stated as I rubbed up and down Winona’s belly. The dog’s tail wagged as she panted happily. I felt Applejack’s hoof rest on my shoulder.

“Yer good with animals, huh?” she asked and I nodded. “Yah should see if it’s okay with Twilight, then get yerself a pet. Might do yah some good.” Her suggestion brought up memories of my own dog.

I knew that my dog had bad arthritis before I got teleported here, so I had no idea if she was still alive or not. A lone tear dripped from my eyes as I remembered my best friend in the whole world.

I immediately stood up and nodded, not letting on that I almost cried. “Maybe,” I muttered in a raspy voice. I was exhausted and I needed some serious sleep. Feeling the dampness of tears coming to my eyes, I quickly moved away from the crowd and to the basement door.

Closing the door behind me, I let go of my restraint and felt tears began to flood my vision. ‘Pussy,’ my conscious hissed to me. “Shut up,” I scowled back as I slowly paced down the stairs. I hadn’t cried in so long, and this felt… painful.

I sat on the edge of my bed. The moonlight that pierced through my window seemed to make each droplet of tear gleam in the night. I took several deep breaths then sucked back, stopping my tears. “Crying doesn’t bring her back,” I told myself. I unslung my shotgun and unloaded it. Finally, after a very long day, I got to lie down.

The festivities upstairs went on, but I could care less if I wasn’t there, and apparently so could they. I didn't hear anypony asking where I was so I figured they didn't care all that much that I wasn't there. As soon as my eyelids shut, I was out cold.

* * *

I really hated hunter orange, I really did. I mean sure, it was safe, but couldn’t someone have made it into a camouflage pattern or something. It just always seemed so much more practical to have something that people would always be able to distinguish, and that animals couldn’t.

I supposed that, in the end, it was the safest route. The orange hunter coat felt ridiculous on my body, along with the stupid orange toque. ‘I swear to god, it was probably some animal rights activists that made up these rules,’ I silently thought to myself.

The century old ‘American Gun Corps.’ double barrel 12 gauge rested heavily in my hands. This thing would technically be an antique if it had been taken care of over the years. Regardless of how clunky, heavy, and rather old it was, I loved to use it anyway.

The sound of a duck calmly quaking about filled the air. I quickly brought my left hand in front of the mix breed dog beside me. Bringing my left finger up to my mouth, I motioned for her to keep quiet, though I doubted that she understood me.

I cocked back both hammers of the side by side shotgun with one simple swipe of my right palm, then my right index and middle fingers slide into the trigger guard. My index finger rested on the front trigger while my right rested just in front of the rear.

My dog, Ally, became anxious. Her tail began to wag furiously and she started panting. A disgruntled duck quack sounded and I looked to Ally. “Ally, sssh,” I whispered. She didn’t pay any attention to me however, and continued to pant.

The quacks became more and more cautious as they became skittery. I took two bold steps forward then paused. The duck quacks continued and I let out a high pitched whistle.

The flapping of wings beating in the air sounded like thunder as five ducks took off into the air above the marshy swamp. My shotgun was up in a blur of motion.

KABOOM! The first shot was immediately echoed by a second, KABOOM. Two ducks fell and the remaining three quickly flew out of range. I thumbed the hitch release and the barrels flung open. I removed the two spent casings and set them in my left pocket. I’d give the spent shells to my Uncle Blair, seeing as how he loved reloading shotgun shells into his own special magnum loads.

I heard Ally slugging through the thick grass of the marsh. The sound of her happy panting filled the now subtle air. In less than two minutes she had both ducks retrieved, though she had made the second duck into her own personal snack.

“Dog..." I shook my head with a chuckle. "What am I going to do with you?” I asked. She looked up to me with loving eyes and I just shook my head with a roll of my eyes. Letting out a sigh then grabbing the duck that she hadn’t destroyed, I began walking back to my house. “Duck for supper sound good to you?” I asked. Ally held the destroyed duck in her mouth. “Yeah, probably eh?” I chuckled.

* * *

Light pierced through my eyelids, making my morning wake-up somewhat disturbed, but all the while subtle and relatively peaceful. My eyelids were crusty, dry, and filled with eye boogers.

It only took a moment to rub away the eye boogers, but my eyes were still dry. I gave a rather loud yawn and tears soon came to my eyes. “That’ll do it,” I whispered before rubbing away the tears.

It took a few minutes for me to stretch and accept the fact that today, I didn’t really want to work out. “I think I’ll fuck the dog today,” I chuckled sarcastically. The taste of morning awfulness filled my mouth. My stomach felt as if it was a cement churner, giving me a slightly nauseous feeling.

“I eat cereal for breakfast, and today… I am VERY HUNGRY,” I stated in a Schwarzenegger voice. I stood up and looked to the shotgun and shells that cluttered the floor beside my bed. The three shotgun shells soon found a home in my right pocket while I slung the Chinese shotgun around my back.

I slipped on my trench coat and it flapped about freely as I walked up the stairs. “Today, I shall be a cowboy,” I chuckled. My movements were sluggish, but I eventually made my way to the kitchen.

The plentiful colours of Fruity Hoops filled my cereal bowl along with some 2% milk. I waited for the milk to seep into the cereal just a little before starting to eat it. As I crunched down on the cereal, I took a look at the cover of the box.

‘THEY’RE SUPERB!’ I thought to myself in a Tony the Tiger voice. I placed my left hand on my face and shook my head from the still retarded catchphrase. A small smile crept onto my face as my left hand was left on my face, chucking from the ridiculousness of marketing ideas.

“They’re so goddamn good you’ll wish you didn’t get diabetes from it,” I laughed silently. My breakfast was almost over just as Spike moseyed on into the kitchen. He grabbed a bowl and, just like me, poured himself a bowl of cereal, though his was much smaller.

“How was your sleep?” I asked and he yawned.

“It was alright. I fell asleep in your truck then woke up in my bed,” he replied, still dazed from morning sleepiness. I nodded then finished off my cereal.

“Well kid, I’m off to work. Say good morning to Twilight for me, would yah?” he nodded. I placed my dirty bowl in the sink then dressed up for the day. Though it wasn’t work clothes, I slipped on: a white V-neck T-shirt, a pair of brown trousers, and my dark brown trench coat.

As always, my Terra work boots were my footwear, though now I was wondering if perhaps Rarity could make me some new cowboy boots… with spurs on the back… and a leather vest… and a real duster coat…

I quickly sped out the door, to my truck, and then towards Rarity’s.

* * *

“Wait… slow down…” she let out a deep breath as she tried to make out my jabbering. “Do you mean like… western wear?” she asked and I nodded. Her eyes went wide and I could tell it might be difficult for her to do.

She quickly levitated out a measuring tape and began taking precise measurements. “Tight or loose fitting, darling?” she asked.

“Not really loose, but loose,” I replied. She nodded and continued measuring my entire body, though she sped through measuring around my groin.

She stepped back and brought out a piece of paper, scribbled something down, then showed it to me. “Is this what you want dear?” she asked and I shook my head with a silent ‘no.’ She gave a frowny face but I let a small smile perk up on my face.

“Almost. Can you get rid of the little flaps behind the neck on the duster? I’m not fancy on that. Other than that… yeah, that’s perfect,” I replied. She nodded, let out another breath then rubbed her front hooves together.

“It should only take a few hours,” she informed me. I handed her the rest of my remaining bits. “What’s this… oh darling, you don’t need to…” I cut her off as I brought my right index finger to her mouth.

“You are… the best! Second to none. Of course I need to pay you,” I replied, then left the premise. I hopped in my truck and flicked on the radio then browsed through the CD track as I made my way to Sweet Apple Acres.

As my truck bumped along the trail, I hummed to the tune that began playing on the radio. I tapped my fingers against the steering wheel in rhythm with music. 'Dude Looks Like a Lady, by Aerosmith' I was so hyped up from the news that I was getting western wear, that I almost forgot about getting a puppy.

‘That! That,
Dude looks like a lady,
That, that,
Dude looks like a lady!’

I began to clap my hands, put sway into my body, and followed the rhythm of the song.

‘That, that,
Dude looks like a lady,
That, that,
Dude looks like a lady!’

I began jamming to the song as I sped along the bumpy trails, sometimes even taking my hands off the wheel just to jam a little harder. Putting a more masculine tone to it, I began singing along to the song.

“Cruised into a bar on the shore,
Her picture graced the grime on the door,
She a long lost love at first bite,
Baby maybe you’re wrong, but you know it’s alright,
That’s right!”

The drive took only a few minutes, considering the pace I was going, and it felt rather quick.

I parked Cadence near the front of the Apple family home and killed the motor. I slipped off my trench coat, not wanting to muck it up, and then stepped out. I brushed my right hand through my hair as I looked around.

“Things look nice today huh?” I asked to nopony in particular.

“Indeed it does. Ready fer work? Just got a new shipment a saplin’s,” Applejack stated. I nodded and we immediately went to work.

* * *

Hours later…

I flopped down with an exhausted sigh and streaked my hands through my sweaty short hair. “Ah yes… now that feels good,” I muttered as my back unclasped. I looked to the afternoon sun and smiled.

My head bobbed slightly as tiredness quickly overtook me. Well, I was technically done, seeing as how we were out of saplings. ‘Maybe… I’ll just rest… for a second…’ I thought to myself as my eyes fluttered. Then, ever so slowly, my conscience became void and dark.

* * *

“THEY’RE SUPERB!” Yelled the scorpion lion thing from Fruity Hoops. “Fruity Hoops are part of a nutritious breakfast!” It yelled, but its voice sounded… feminine.

“And always remember that I’m at the top of the food chain!” she yelled then lashed out at me. “Wait! What the fuck!?” I yelled silently, leaping out of the way just in time to dodge her swing.

I rolled, planted my feet, then lept up. I instinctively reached for a holster on my hip. ‘Wait, when did I get a hip holster?’

In a flash of motion I drew out a gleaming Colt SAA that had ivory grips. I brought the revolver down to hip level and fanned the hammer. .45LC rounds flew through the air and collided with the mascot beast.

As if I had no control over my body, my right finger hit a cylinder release tab and the cylinder swung out, automatically ejecting all the shells. ‘Wait! Colt SAAs don’t have cylinder releases!’ I tried to scream out but nothing happened, my body just kept moving on its own.

In another blur of motion, my left hand stuffed a speed loader of six rounds into the empty cylinder. My right hand flicked its wrist and the cylinder snapped shut. Then, without fanning the hammer, my right index finger began pulling the trigger.

The revolver seemed to act double action though the actual hammer itself never moved. The gun echoed with loud gunshots that were just short of deafening to my eardrums.

The gun clicked, signalling it was empty. My right thumb instinctively cocked the hammer back and somehow, probably mystically, the gun was fully loaded again. I fired off another six rounds in roughly two seconds. The creature in front of me roared and swatted me aside.

My vision blurred red, then everything seemed to get… hippy-ish. The sky swirled with weird light patterns. Bugs seemed to form out of clouds, then would stretch out like spaghetti and form something else that was completely irrelevant.

‘WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!’ I tried to scream, but again nothing came out, just silence. The lion scorpion came over and slammed its right paw down on my chest. A mixture of blue and green fluids sprayed into the air, almost like I had been stabbed.

The creature then pulled its paw away, leaving a nasty claw stabbed into my chest. The lion somehow grasped a large revolver and chambered a round. “Time to join your father, detective,” it stated in a female Russian voice.

I wanted to throw my arms into the air and yell ‘THIS MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE.’ Suddenly a dog plummeted into the side of the creature, knocking it aside. My stare changed to the two as they battled.

At first the dog easily outclassed the lion, biting at its neck and scratching the lion’s underbelly as the duo fought on their hindlegs.

All of a sudden, the lion tackled the dog to the ground and thrashed its jaws into the dog’s gut. The dog whimpered out in pain as purple fluid splashed through the air, some of it tainting my vision like I was in some sort of videogame.

My right hand reached to the claw that was stabbed into my chest. I gripped it with a death grip and pulled it out, almost effortlessly. Pain shot through my mind after the claw was removed, but this time real looking blood splattered out of my chest, again tainting my vision like some sort of videogame.

I flipped the claw in my hand, spinning it and grasping the tip with just my thumb and index finger. “Hey pussy cat!” My body’s voice called out. The lion turned and no sooner had it looked at me, my hand tossed the claw through the air.

Time seemed to slow to a ridiculous drag time and I could literally see the claw cutting through the air, wisping air out of its way and making visual air waves. The claw stabbed right between the eyes of the lion and an obscene amount of black blood splattered in the air.

I wanted to just flop my arms around due to the stupidity of what was going on. The lion slowly fell backwards, slamming into the ground and creating a tuft of dust as it landed.

I rolled over onto my hands and knees and began crawling over to the dog. Grey spots of blood spurted onto the ground, dotting the ground in a weird colour scheme. My vision blurred to an absurd amount but, regardless, my body somehow knew where it was going.

“Ally…” I mindlessly spoke with a British accent. “Ally,” I said again, still in a British accent. “Ally!” I continued crawling along the ground until I reached the mutilated dog which was somehow still alive.

Her blood was everywhere, except her blood wasn’t blood, it was… Fruity Hoops? I cradled my now dying dog in my arms, weeping softly as she started to pass.

“Evan…” she whispered in a soft tone. Tears dripped from my eyes and dampened her facial fur. She weakly brought a paw up to my face and rubbed my cheek. “Never let go…” she took a final, short breath, then her paw suddenly fell from my face and her body went limp in my arms.

“No… Ally… please don’t go,” my voice spoke out.

* * *

A gentle nudge spooked me awake and I was up in an instant. I was panting heavily and immediately, my glare shot to Applejack who stood before me. “Ah’d ask if yah were workin hard er hardly working, but… knowing you, ah’d say it was a bit a’ both,” Applejack stated. The evening sun made her pretty blonde ponytail gleam, making her look rather nice.

I let out a deep exhale. “Thank you,” I whispered and she raised an eyebrow.

“Fer what?” she asked and I chuckled.

“For saving me from my dream that you really don’t want to know about,” I said as I remembered the funky-ass, somewhat saddening dream. She was about to ask what it was about, but must’ve figured it was better not to ask.

AJ handed me a pouch. “That’s a hundred ‘n fifty. Reckon yah worked that hard,” she stated and I nodded.

“Where can I get a puppy?” I asked and she tilted her head in slight confusion. “You know… yay big,” I said as I measured out with my hands how big a puppy would be. “Cute, cuddly, adorable,” Applejack cut me off.

“Ah know what a puppy looks like…” she trailed off and shook her head. “How yah go from one topic then suddenly switch tah another sometimes confuses me,” she stated then rubbed her forehead. “Ah suppose Fluttershy could help. She lives in a cottage that way…” she trailed off and pointed over to the forest.

“Sweet! Thanks AJ!” I sputtered out my sentence and was off in a fume of dust, heading towards my truck.

“HEY WAIT!” Applejack called out. I turned back and looked to her. “Yah might not want tah go at this hour. ‘Specially after what happened last night at Twilight’s,” she stated and I brushed my hand in the air carelessly.

“Bah, it’ll be fine. She’ll understand when I explain it to her,” I replied and rushed off. ‘Why? What happened at Twilight’s last night? I know there was a party, but did she get really drunk and was still trying to get over her hangover or something?’ I thought. ‘Probably something I should’ve asked AJ,’ I thought to myself as I turned on my truck.

“Time to get a puppy,” I squealed happily. ‘Hopefully she’ll have a golden retriever like what Chrysie got. Or maybe…’ I trailed off and squealed in delight as I thought about a certain breed of dog. I slipped the truck into drive and pinned the pedal to the metal… well actually it was pinned to the carpet.

A thought came to my head and I slammed the brakes, did a u-turn, and then sped towards Rarity’s. “My stuff will be ready,” I told myself as I flicked on the radio and changed the track back to ‘Dude looks like a lady’.

Time seemed to drag on forever as I sped along towards Rarity’s. “Man… I feel like a kid on Christmas Eve,” I muttered to myself.

Finally, and I mean it felt like forever, I reached the boutique. I left my truck idling and rushed in without even knocking. Rarity nearly jumped out of her beautiful white fur as I barged into her boutique.

“GAH! Darling…” she gasped, bringing a hoof to her chest. She tried to slow her now heavy breathing. “You startled me,” she stated then let out a deep exhale. “Haven’t you ever heard of knocking? Why, I almost thought you were a robber,” she informed me.

“Indeed… I’m gonna get a puppy from somepony in the forest so I gotta make this quick,” I informed her rather quickly. She nodded, almost as if she knew what I needed and levitated over a cluster of folded clothing.

I quickly undressed to nothing but my boxers. Rarity blushed and covered her eyes with her left hoof. “Darling! Do you really have to do that here?” she asked timidly.

“Sorry… I’m in a real rush,” I replied bashfully. I glanced over and noticed that she had lifted her hoof up slightly so that she could catch a glance of me. “Like the scenery?” I asked.

She gave a faint peep and quickly covered her vision. A blush came across her cheeks and I chuckled silently as I finished slipping on the apparel. “Oh… my… god!” I gasped and she lept up.

“What’s wrong darling?” she asked in a worried tone.

“This… is so… sick,” I muttered in an utterly amazed voice.

“You… you don’t like it?” she whimpered and I looked over to her with a raised eyebrow.
“Huh? No… I mean yes. I mean, yes I like it. That’s why I said it’s sick,” I told her and she tilted her head in a confused manner. “Uhm… uh…” I let out a faint chuckle as I realized she had probably taken it the wrong way. “Back on my world, when you say something is ‘Sick!’ it generally means it’s kickass,” I informed her.

“Who created your world’s strange dialogue?” she asked and I shrugged. I paced over, picked her up, and swung her around in circles, keeping her in a tight hug all the while.

“Thank you so much Rarity. These clothes are so cool,” I told her then stopped swirling around and set her down. She staggered about briefly and brought a hoof to her head in an attempt to balance herself. Her mane was now frazzled and out of style, giving her a kind of hipster look. She let out a fainting breath and collapsed on a couch that was conveniently placed behind her.

“Well, I gotta go get a puppy. Thanks again Rarity,” I said as I leaned down and gave her a gentler hug. With that, I rushed out of the boutique, leaving Rarity to sort herself out. I kinda felt bad, but I really, really, REALLY, wanted my new puppy.

* * *

I banged on the door frantically, almost as if I was being chased by Timberwolves. The lights were all on, so I knew somepony was home. The door gently opened to reveal a pale yellow pegasus with a long, flowing pink mane.

“Hi,” I said and, for whatever reason, I sounded a little like Schwarzenegger when I said it. Her eyes went wide then she screamed in absolute horror and slammed the door in my face.

“Well dat was rude,” I whispered to myself, still in an Arnie voice. I frowned then knocked again.

A voice replied, but it was so faint that I could barely hear it. “Go away!... Well, that is if you don’t mind…”

I knocked again. “Please don’t hurt me… if that’s okay with you,” the voice cried. ‘What the fuck? Who the fuck talks like that. Don’t hurt me, if that’s okay with you? That’s…’ I trailed off my thoughts and knocked again.

“Excuse me… ma’am? I’d like to get a puppy and was told this was a good place to go,” I called out loud. A doggy door opened and a gerbil was pushed through.

I picked it up in the palm of my hand and it looked up to me, sitting on its rump as its whiskers twitched. I set it back down and pushed it back through the doggy door. “Can I have a dog?” I asked.

This time a full sized dog was pushed through. It was a slobbering Great Dane. I pushed it back with a roll of my eyes. “I kinda wanted a puppy,” I stated.

A hairless Chihuahua puppy was pushed through. I picked it up in my right palm and looked at the grotesque creature. It stood shaking in the palm of my hand with a weird look on it's face. I set it down and pushed it back to the owner. “Do you have a catalogue I can choose from?” I asked.

A few moments passed before a scrap of paper was pushed to me. The whole page was obviously written very quickly. The title read, in scratchy writing: ‘Catalogue’ and the understatement read ‘I has animals’ then there was a small blurb at the bottom.

I leaned my face close to it so that I could read it. ‘Please leave me alone… unless you don’t want to.’

“Who the fuck…” I let out a sigh at how retarded this mare was when she talked. You don’t ask someone to leave and then state it’s okay to stay if they don’t want to leave. I began to beat my head against the trunk of the tree due to the absolute stupidity of what was going on.

“I don’t know what’s weirder: my dream, or this,” I scowled to myself. My forehead began to swell and bleed as I continued to bang it off the tree home. At least it was somewhat furnished and the bark wasn’t ragged. In fact, the bark was actually smooth, probably the reason my forehead wasn't scratched all to shit.

The door opened slightly and a head peeked out. “OH MY CELESTIA! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” the mare gasped and I looked over to her, blood now running down part of my forehead.

“This is some screwy dream,” I stated, my balance starting to topple.

She gasped then rushed to my side. “Why would you hurt yourself?!” she pleaded and I grimaced slightly.

“Not quite sure. Why are you so timid?” I asked. There was a long pause as she kept silent.

“But I don’t hurt myself… oh dear… that looks like it hurts,” she whispered worriedly as she fluttered up to eye level and examined my face. I tugged away and she gasped, then tried to further examine my face.

“Oh… please hold still… well, if it’s okay with you,” she stated sheepishly. I kept pulling my face away from her view and she continued to try and examine my wound.

“If I let you examine me, then will you give me a puppy?” I asked.

“All you wanted was a… a puppy?” she asked in a shocked tone. Suddenly it clicked. This was that mare… the one that I held at gunpoint… the one at Twilight’s house last night that I thought was a burglar.

“Sorry,” I apologized and she stayed silent, not sure yet what I was apologizing for. “Last night. I uhh… kinda thought you were a burglar. So… sorry for holding yah at gunpoint and... well..." I chuckled sheepishly. "Sorry for threatening to kill you.” I apologized, explaining my apology.

“Me… a burglar?” she gasped, pointing to herself in disbelief.

“It was dark and gloomy. How was I supposed to know. Kinda like how you didn’t know all I wanted was a dog,” I informed her.

She let out a relieved sigh then nodded. “Thank you. I thought for sure you were coming to finish me off,” she told me, and then out of nowhere, she pulled out a medical kit and began putting some sort of cream on my forehead, then wrapped it with medical wrap. “You should be more careful. You could get a really, really bad head injury,” she told me in a googly voice, almost as if she was speaking to an infant. “Now, about that puppy…”

* * *

An hour later…

My duster coat flapped about freely in the gentle breeze as she finished her song. ‘As if she flew around for the last hour singing about the perfect pet,’ I thought silently. I blinked as she drew uncomfortably close to my face, with a squeaky bright smile plastered on hers.

I leaned back with a rather hesitant smile, but still she stayed hovering ever closer to my face. She finally stopped flying closer to me, but now her face was only millimeters away from mine. I could literally feel her gentle breathing against my cheeks. “I want an English Collie puppy,” I stated bluntly. She brought her front hooves up to her face, squealing in absolute delight before dashing off. ‘God… she just went from creepy… to just plain disturbing,’ I thought.

In another moment she raced back, a beautiful Collie in her hooves. “Is it a male or female?” I asked.

“Female. Is that okay with you?” she asked and I nodded.

“Perfect actually,” I replied as I took the puppy and cradled it in my arms. “I shall call her Lassie,” I said as I rocked the astonishingly young puppy in my arms. It probably wasn’t older than 3 months. I began to make googly sounds as I rubbed it's tummy with my fingers. "Oooh, who's a little cutie pie?" I squeaked. The puppy had a funny smile on it's face as it's tongue drooled out the side of it's mouth.

I looked up to ask Fluttershy how old my puppy was, but realized she was flying around frantically. I walked over to my truck, opened the passenger door, and set my new puppy on the passenger seat.

I closed the door behind me as I made my way over to the frantic pegasus. “Are you… alright?” I asked and she shook her head frantically.

“No! It’s Angel. Angel’s run off into the Everfree! WhatamIgoingtodo?!” she cried in absolute fear.

“Go get him?” I asked like it was a simple task. She grabbed the collar of my coat and shook me gently.

“Just go get him!?” she stated in a regular voice, though I was willing to bet this was her version of screaming frantically. “It’s spring time! This is when all the predators come out of hibernation. It would be…” she trailed off and leaned towards me, then motioned for me to lean in for a secret.

I leaned towards her face and she motioned for me to get closer. I leaned a bit closer, but she motioned for me to get closer still. I leaned, but it still wasn’t far enough. I leaned closer and she brought her lips right to my ear.

‘God that’s uncomfortable,’ I thought just before she whispered into my ear. It felt like she was tongue raping my ear “It would be…” she trailed off again, then whispered so softly that I couldn’t hear her.

“What was that?” I asked and she whispered again but, although louder, I still couldn’t hear her. “Come again?” I asked. She whispered “Sui…” but a nearby floating leaf whispered past and made it difficult to hear.

“One more time,” I stated.

This time it was kind of clear. “Suicide,” she whispered. I raised an eyebrow and leaned back.

“Is that like… a bad word or something?” I asked and she nodded rapidly. I rolled my eyes and walked over to my truck and retrieved my SKS rifle, a couple rounds of ammunition, and my bowie knife.

“Okay… I’ll help you on this…” I grabbed her, brought her close, then whispered into her ear. “Suicide mission,” I leaned back and she brought her hooves to her mouth.

“You’d… you’d help me? Why?... I mean, if you don’t mind me asking,” she asked and I rolled my eyes. ‘Man… this mare is really weird,’ I silently thought.

“Because we’re guh friens,” I told her in a Schwarzenegger tone. She nodded with a genuine smile before she pulled me into a hug.

“Thank you so much. I don’t know what I would’ve done,” she thanked me and, again, I rolled my eyes. This mare was too… caring.

“Well, we haven’t found him yet. Maybe we should get moving?” I offered. She quickly pulled back from the hug and nodded, then started following what I presumed to be Angel’s path.

* * *

So it turned out that we were looking for a rabbit. Yeah, go figure, she has us going on a suicide mission for a rabbit. And, for the last few hours, I could swear we were going around in circles.

I looked to my watch and thumbed the light button. A neon blue glow lit up the digital readout ’11:39 PM.’

“We’re walking in circles,” I mumbled. She stopped hovering for a moment and landed.

“How do you know?” she asked frantically. ‘How a mare stays absolutely frantic for hours on end is beyond me,’ I kept my thoughts to myself. I knelt down, pulled out my bowie knife, and tapped the multiple sets of boot prints.

“I’ve walked over this trail at least a dozen times,” I told her. She brought her front hooves to her cheeks as she flopped down onto her haunches.

“Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear ohdearohdear…” she continued being absurdly frantic and I paced over to a nearby bush to take a leak.

As I relieved myself, my senses became adept. My hearing began homing in on the ambient nature wildlife.

Though this was a gloomy forest, it sounded more like a tropical rainforest. Tropical bird sounds filled the air. ‘Birds… at night?’ I thought to myself before shaking off the thought.

I finished up and put away my little buddy before turning and spotting Fluttershy cowering on the ground, in the fetal position. She was sucking on her hoof like a baby and I rubbed my eyes carelessly.

“Yeah I could take a nap too…” I began, but she hissed at me.

“Sssh! Quiet!” she hissed and I raised an eyebrow. I had never heard her use that tone yet, and it was kind of nice to see that she could be a little bit more assertive with things if she wanted to.

“Why? What’s wrong?” I asked, and again she hissed at me.

“I said, SSSH! Or they’ll hear you!” she hissed and I was rather impressed by her tone.

“Hear me. Who will hear me?” I asked casually. She didn’t answer but, for whatever reason, the hairs on the back of my neck prickled up. Everything seemed to get louder, my heart began to pump faster and my vision sharpened.

Something wasn’t right. I quickly racked the bolt on the SKS, chambering a round. I heard a twig snap behind me and I spun, peering into the dense darkness. Fluttershy whined in fear.

I held a hand out, signalling her to be quiet. “Sssh… sssh.” I whispered to her. Funny, now it was I who was telling her to be quiet. My hearing could barely pick up anything other than bird sounds and…

SNAP!

My rifle was up and locked towards the direction of my unseen target. “The Willow Walkers…” Fluttershy cried. ‘The fuck are…’ My thoughts trailed off as a creepy, bipedal tree crept into view. It would stand at about five feet high, just by first glance. It had two long dangly arms, two long spindly legs, but no head. There was just a flat plate of what looked to be soft, silky white moss.

Weird pollen floated about and gleamed in the night, illuminating the small area around us in a glow of light blue. Fluttershy continued to whimper, but I didn’t see what was so frightening. This was actually kind of nice.

It’s arms extended as it continued walking towards me, now having the appearance of a zombie. The long jagged arms began to stretch out into vines. “Join us…” a deathly voice whispered an echo through the forest.

“Whoa! Zombie…” I stated as I brought up the rifle. ‘WAIT! IT HAS NO HEAD! HOW DO I KILL IT!?’ I thought to myself. “FUCK YOU!” I yelled then turned the creature into swiss cheese with armour piercing rounds. The muzzle flare lit up the night and my rifle chattered, drowning out the death whispers. As each round projected out the muzzle of the gun, the muzzle flash illuminated my face. I gritted my teeth as I continued to pop off rounds at the... tree zombie.

The creature twisted and turned as 123g full metal jacket rounds tore through it. The receiver finally locked back as I fired the tenth round. I lowered the smoking muzzle of the rifle to observe the destruction I had done. The muzzle flashes had temporarily burned blurs into my vision, making it difficult to see properly.

The creature stood dormant for another moment before starting to walk towards me. “Fuck, fuck, fuckfuckfuckfuck… FUCK!” I yelled as I slammed another ten rounds into the gun. I lined up a shot but time seemed to slow. ‘Yah gotta shoot em in the head,’ my conscience told me.

“They don’t have a fuckin head!” I yelled back. ‘Yah gotta shoot em in the head,’ my mind thought again. I was about to repeat my argument, before I thought to myself. Everything seemed to click together like a nearly finished puzzle. I muttered to myself, “Shoot ‘em in the head.”

My shot lined up perfectly, almost by instinct. The rifle stock rocked against my shoulder as I pulled the trigger back. The muzzle flare lept out of the barrel like the long pointy finger of death that it was. A single full metal jacket round tore through the plate head of the creature.

It dropped like a sack of bricks but, as it hit the ground, it’s body erupted into millions of the weird pollen-light-thingies. “Damn… that was melodramatic,” I muttered before turning back to Fluttershy with a smile of victory. The pollen lights fluttered about and floated along in the air before landing several yards away from us.

Fluttershy was still huddled on the ground. I offered her a hand as I smiled to myself. Before I could grab her hoof to help her up, I got the feeling that something wasn't right. I looked up and my smile instantly died. The pollen lights had disappeared, and now hundreds of the zombie things walked towards us. “Oh shit,” I stated rather bluntly, and again, in a Schwarzenegger tone. I quickly ran forwards, scooped up Fluttershy, hefted her onto my shoulder, and made a beeline for the dense forest. I blew through a weak link in their group and charged the forest head on.

Trees seemed to blur past me as I raced along at a rather fast pace. Underbrush was kicked up with dirt as my boots treaded through the undergrowth.

I shredded through a thick patch of brush and into a small clearing. In the middle was a white bunny who was tapping his foot impatiently. He began to chatter at me like I did something awful.

“Uhm… sorry that I killed your minions,” I apologized, figuring he was probably some sort of necrosis alchemist or something. It slapped itself in the head and let out a louder chatter of irritation.

Fluttershy gasped, lept off my shoulder, and zoomed over to the bunny. “Ohh Angel, I was sooo worried about you…” she was cut off as the bunny slapped her across the face in an aggravated fashion.

“Hey! Don’t hit Fluttershy you little runt!” I yelled out as I paced over. The bunny rolled its eyes like I wasn’t scary. I stepped over, looming over him like a mountain, then snatched him off the ground.

“You ever hit Fluttershy like that again and I swear to god I’ll-” I began my threat, but Fluttershy cut me off.

“Oh please don’t hurt him. He’s right, it was all my fault,” she pleaded his innocence.

“It is not your fault! He’s the little shit that ran away. He can’t damn well slap you around like you’re his personal slave!” I boomed then shook the bunny. “YAH GOT THAT!” I told him sternly. He nodded as his eyes went wide.

“Oh… maybe you’re being too assertive,” Fluttershy chimed. Suddenly the bunny covered his eyes and urinated in fear.

It leaked all over my western vest. I began turning to Fluttershy to hand her the stupid rabbit. “Oh for the love of…” I began but never finished. At the last moment, time seemed to slow. I spotted something big coming at me, though I knew for certain I had no time to react.

‘Oh shit,’ was all I could think at the exact same moment that something big collided with me. My grasp on the bunny was released as my body crashed along the ground. The creature came over and began to thrash at my body with sharp claws that sliced through my clothes and skin like a knife to butter.

With a last ditch jolt of strength, I booted it in the gut, sending it toppling back. A painful surge of stinging pain bolted across my entire body. I felt warm blood oozing from my wounds.

I lifted the collar of my shirt. The cuts looked nasty but not deep. Luckily blood wasn’t spurting so I don’t think I had any severed arteries as of yet. I tried to get up, but only managed getting to a crouch.

I looked to see one of those scorpion lion things quarreling around me. I let out several pants before unslinging my SKS. “Aright doll… let’s play rough,” I muttered before leveling the rifle with one hand.

I pulled the stock tight to my arm as I rested my left hand on the ground, steading my body. The creature charged and I ripped off every single shot in the magazine as fast as I could manage.

Shots sprayed wildly through the air, some slamming into the beast, some just clipping it, and others flying wildly off target. Smoking cartridges flew out of the rifle as it chugged through ammunition like a pig.

One of the shots clipped the creature's left knee and it careened out of control. Its body sideswiped me and sent me tumbling again. Both of us staggered up, and this time I managed to stand to my feet.

I painfully drew out a stripper clip and fed ten rounds to the rifle. “Okay… round two?” I asked. I had a split lower lip that leaked blood into my mouth. I spit out a glob of saliva and blood, then readied my rifle.

The beast snarled and pawed the dirt beneath it, ready to charge. I racked the slide and it clacked shut. I reached forwards and flipped out the bayonet. Suddenly Fluttershy leapt in front of the beast. “JUST YOU WAIT ONE MINUTE MISTER!” she yelled at it in a stern voice.

The creature took a step back. “DO YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST HURT MY FRIEND LIKE THAT? WELL DO YOU?!” she yelled. Wow, now this was impressive. I had never seen her like this.

The lion lowered its shoulders. “GAH! Fluttershy, look out!” I yelled, but she paid me no mind.

“NOW I WANT YOU TO APOLOGIZE TO MY FRIEND AND…” she was cut off as the creature swung its left paw back. Time seemed to slow and its claws gleamed in the moonlight.

“FLUTTERSHY!” I roared, but I was way too late. It swatted her away like a bug. A trail of blood flew through the air, almost as if it followed her. I let out a roar as my vision seemed to shake in rage.

Everything looked like it had turned a dark red haze. The haze slightly illuminated the world for my eyes. I charged forwards, firing my rifle from the hip. Bullets whizzed through the air and collided with the monster, spurting blood out of both entry and exit wounds.

Before I could reach the lion, my rifle ran dry. I charged violently, the rifle swinging to and fro in my grip as I charged. The beast staggered as it tried to compose itself.

My vision narrowed and every part of my sight lined up with its skull. My knees bent then sprang, propelling my feet off the ground. I swung my rifle back, the bayonet gleamed in the moonlight, then slammed it forwards.

The tip of the bayonet slashed into the skull of the monster, killing it instantly. Our bodies crashed to the ground, and the momentum force sent me tumbling across the ground with pained grunts.

An instant headache pierced through my brain and I groaned. “This… feels like a Monday,” I muttered. I lay there for a moment before I heard the soft whimpering that came from my shy pegasus friend.

I groaned as I stood up and retrieved my rifle that lay beside me. Dirt was jammed in the open receiver, but I could care less. “Flutter…” I mumbled as I staggered across the forest floor.

“Fluttershy…” I continued to mumble, then collapsed by her side, falling to my knees. Blood leaked out of her wounds at an alarming rate. “Oh shit,” I muttered in an alarmed voice, then my recent dream struck my mind in a blinding blur. I cringed from the searing pain that raged through my brain.

“Hold on Shy… I’m not gonna let you die here… I’m not gonna let you die,” I whispered then quickly took off my duster coat. “Sorry Rarity… desperate times call for…” I trailed off, not needing to say the rest.

My bowie knife was unsheathed and I quickly sliced apart the duster coat into sizable lengths. Luckily she still had that medical pack, which turned out to be tucked behind her left wing, which at the moment was soaked with blood.

I used the cut up duster coat as improvised bandages and applied medical tape over it. She didn’t have nearly enough medical wrap to cover this, but my extra coat slices finished the job. Time was running pretty slim.

I did quick mental math. Five or six minutes to get to my truck, race to hospital in less than five minutes, we might have a shot at this. 'Oh please god...' I thought as my breathing became nervous and shaky.

I heaved her into my arms and stuffed the bunny into my pocket. As I ran through the forest, I made quick thoughts about where her house was. I knew the general direction of Ponyville, but I couldn’t actually miss her house or this would be over before it started.

My rifle clacked around against my sore back as I raced along. The trees started to blur in my vision as I raced past them. I wondered how much blood I had lost. Would I die of blood loss before I even got us to the hospital?

I quickly subdued the thought, knowing it would probably hinder my calculations.

I burst through a dense thicket of brush and came out just twenty yards past Fluttershy’s tree house thing. I quickly spotted my truck and raced over. Opening the door, I spotted my new puppy, now huddled underneath the center console.

I rolled the passenger seat forwards and laid Fluttershy across the back seat. Her blood seeped into my seat. I silently grimaced, knowing fully well how hard blood was to get out of furniture.

Without even hesitating, I slammed the door and rushed to the other side of the truck and leapt into the driver side. I activated the ignition lock then flicked on the key and waited for the glow plug light to switch off. Though only a two second wait time, it felt like it was taking forever.

“COME ON CADENCE!” I roared. Fluttershy murmured something in her unconscious state. The glow plug light flicked off and I started the truck.

Cadence rumbled, but didn’t even have a chance to idle. I slipped my truck into reverse and pulled out of Fluttershy’s laneway trail. Angel squeezed out of my pocket just as I whipped the truck around in a rather long 180 motion.

I pulled down on the transmission stick and slipped it into drive then slammed the pedal to the floor. “COME ON CADENCE!” I roared at the top of my vocal limit.

The tachometer nearly red lined as it hit 3500 rpm. The turbocharger immediately whined and the truck switched gears. There was a loud blowout as the turbocharger settled.

The tachometer stayed revved at 2500 rmp as it slipped into second gear. The speedometer read 30… 40… 50… The tachometer reached 3500 again and the turbo hissed as it let out a blowout and the truck fell to third gear, then immediately to fourth.

It seemed like it was bogging at just over 1000 rpm, but slowly built its way back up. I shredded through the dirt trails towards Ponyville. The truck started to hit a steady 130km/h… then 140... and then finally 150.

I realized how foolish this was. One steep bump and my truck would flip. I kept to the outskirts of town and took the risk. “All or nothing…” I told myself. Blood dripped down my forehead and stung my vision, but I kept my eyes open.

My eyes burned for the need to clench shut, but I kept them open. “All… or… NOTHING!” I roared through several grunts of pain. I spotted the hospital and feathered the brake. Too hard and I probably would’ve ended up careening out of control.

The truck began to slow, but I ended up slamming into a parked carriage at at least 50km/h. The carriage crumpled under the force of my hard bumper. I quickly slipped into reverse and drove a few feet back from the carriage.

The entire driver side was caved in and the wheels were cocked on an angle now. Luckily nopony was inside the vehicle. I quickly killed the engine of my truck and retrieved Fluttershy before rushing into the hospital.

I booted open the front doors and everypony inside looked to me. “Get this pony to an ER… NOW!” I yelled.

Redheart paced over to me and gasped then whistled to two other ponies who immediately rushed over with a stretcher. “Get this pony to trauma!” she ordered. I placed Fluttershy on the stretcher and they rushed off with her.

My knees almost immediately gave out from under me and I collapsed back first onto a table that shattered under my weight. “Oh my goddess, EVAN!” Redheart screamed as she knelt down beside me.

“Hey, chill, chill. I’m fine,” I told her with a casual and relaxed tone. “Just a little tired,” I told her. She rested a hoof over my bleeding chest.

“Oh my Celestia… this is bad. Evan, we need to get you to trauma as well,” she whispered as she examined my wounds. I chuckled from the comment.

With a humored tone, I laughed, “If you think I look bad, you should’ve seen the other guy.”

Chapter 9

Contains explicit scenes

‘Oh man… not this again.’

Saturday, March 23rd 2014…

The friggin doctors once again insisted I stay for an extra day. They said it was to make sure I recovered properly, but I knew they were just experimenting on me, or at least trying to.

It was early in the morning, that I knew, though what time exactly was beyond me. I had the same room as before, only now it was occupied by Fluttershy, Angel, Lassie, and myself, well, and my rifle: Applebloom.

Lassie and Angel lay curled up on a doggy bed that Applejack had graciously brought in, though Angel had pushed Lassie off for the most part. I’d have to teach that dog to be more defensive.

I looked over to my rifle, now clean and void of dirt and muck. The stock was still battered to hell and I was going to have to do something about that. I examined the rifle further and noticed the hole in the bottom of the magazine from where I had removed the magazine plug rivet. Sunlight gleamed off the black barrel and made me smile. Just having a rifle with me made me feel safe.

A soft snicker exited my lips as I remembered last night. I nearly broke another doctor’s arm when they tried to administer me a needle, then, once again, Redheart offered me the tetanus potion. And although I knew its side effects, I accepted, albeit grudgingly.

I took a peek under my medical bandages to see that I was void of both cuts and scarring. ‘Potions really do wonders…’ I looked to my boner that was making a tent out of my bed sheets. ‘And other things…’ I thought begrudgingly.

“Fuck you,” I whispered, knowing full well how much of a problem he was going to give me today.

I looked over to Fluttershy. For whatever reason, she hadn’t been administered as much healing potion as I had. She was still in bandages and was looking a little rough, though it was certain she’d make it through this.

My cock throbbed and I rolled my eyes. Things were about to heat up and I needed to get out of here. I didn’t have my regular attire since Rarity had stopped by yesterday and offered to fix up my clothes. It was kind of funny, though she was happy that I had saved Fluttershy’s life, she was rather sad that I had destroyed the clothes in the process.

I stood up, grabbed my rifle and Lassie, then made my way for the door. I let my boner make a tent out of my hospital gown and just sighed regretfully.

Redheart was already waiting at the door with my waiver papers. “Forgot to get me to sign them again?” I asked and she just rolled her eyes and prompted me to sign them. I signed my signature in what looked like chicken scratch then handed the waiver back to her. “I really gotta go, you understand. See yah later Redheart,” I told her and she nodded. My luck, I’d probably be back here before Tuesday.

I looked to my truck. The grill bar lights were smashed, but other than that, Cadence looked to be okay. I moved to the back of my truck and placed Applebloom in her respective case then hopped into my truck and started it, though it sounded as if the exhaust was buggered. “Great…” I muttered sarcastically. I wondered briefly if perhaps the pony who owned the carriage had smashed my truck up. I quickly remembered some stallion coming into the hospital and complaining about how 'Some dick smashed my carriage with a bat'.

I shrugged then drove towards the library. The truck puttered pretty heavily as the muffler refused to do its duty. I parked the truck in my car shelter, the front end facing the back of the shelter rather than the road.

I got out and rushed into the library. Without saying hello, I rushed into the library, brought Lassie downstairs, and gave her a dish of food. The dog food and bowl were courtesy of Applejack. I gave her a nod then rushed back outside without seeing anyone. ‘Maybe Spike and Twilight are still asleep,’ I thought to myself.

Moving at a now speedy pace, I skidded around the front of my truck and rushed into the driver seat. As quickly as I could manage, I leaned the seat back and grabbed the magazine off the floor, the one that Cheerilee had given me.

The title read ‘Playcolt’ and there were a bunch of little captions stating things about what this issue had. I paid little mind to the captions and took a long enticed look at the mare on the cover. She was in a very suggestive stance, though she had her tail conveniently placed between her legs, obstructing one’s view of her nethers.

I didn’t really care about self-disgust, I didn’t want to go through what I had to last time. In my opinion, looking at a porn mag while choking the chicken would be a decent way to beat the heat, or urges, or whatever this was.

I quickly flipped it open to the first page, only to be disappointed from the sight of an index. I had never read a Playboy magazine back home, so I had no idea what they were like. Whenever I wanted pornography, the television would suffice.

I flipped to the second page, but it was a continuation of the index. “Shit…” I whispered, then flipped to the third page. There was an article but it didn’t look enticing. It had some mare in front of an adult nightclub. The title of the article read something about ‘First adult night club in town of Oxton.’

I quickly flipped through until I found a very breathtaking picture of a light blue mare with a pure white mane. She was lying on a bed with a look of lust on her face, her gaze directed to the viewer, which just so happened to be me.

I fumbled out my stiff shaft and began jerking off. My pleasure didn’t last long and there was a powerful build up in my groin. “Oh shit… I gotta find somewhere to…” My nostrils quickly picked up the scent of blood.

I looked to the back seat to see it stained with blood. “Oh yeah… that’s right,” I mused to myself. I’d have to find somepony to clean that or something. I shrugged off my thoughts and focused on the more pressing issue.

I shrugged and figured I’d just blow my load onto the hospital gown, then throw it away later on. The doctors probably wouldn’t mind, and after I was done, they probably wouldn’t want it back either.

My jerking sped up and the pressure that had been quickly built up felt as if it erupted out the tip of my cock. Every spurt of spooge felt like a tidal wave of pleasure washing over me.

The side effects of the tetanus potion really amped up the pleasure in beating off. My jizz seeped down my hand in sticky globs. “Ech…” I muttered in a disgusted voice as I wiped myself off with the hospital gown. I leaned back with a sigh and a slight feeling of drowsiness came over me.

After at least half an hour, another urge in my groin demanded my immediate attention. I flipped to the next page of the magazine and was greeted with another breathtaking mare in another pose, though this time she was on an office desk. I didn’t read what her name was since it was probably something like ‘Blueberry’ or ‘Nightfury.’

Her fur was jet black and her mane and tail were purple. I looked to her bountiful breasts as I started jerking off, then I noticed the start of a small story. I looked at the underlined title and it read ‘Just another day in the office.’ A hint of curiosity enticed me and I began reading it aloud to myself, all the while still jerking off.

* * *

‘Just another day at work. Come on Raindrop! You can do this’ That’s what I kept trying to tell myself the whole morning while I got ready for work. I knew I had to wear something to conceal myself. I was in a mad heat and my scent was undeniable. I wouldn’t want any of the pigs in the office getting any ideas about me.

I chose a jet black leather coat with black jeans that all matched my fur. Unfortunately the jeans were a little too tight and hugged my curves. I muttered a quiet curse before rushing out the door and heading for the office.

The cold breeze outside helped keep my mind off of it, though as soon as I got into the office and sat at my desk, it was back. I groaned to myself pitifully as I knew the day would just seem to drag on forever.

I felt my nethers cringe in need of attention. All morning I had spent pleasuring myself, but I couldn’t darn well do that here. I quickly went about filing a bunch of office reports.

Suddenly a voice caught me off guard. “Hey Drop. What’s up sexy?” The rather unattractive stallion beside me asked. He leaned against the wall next to my desk with a casual look.

“The roof,” I replied, not really paying him much attention. He tried starting up a flirtatious conversation, and despite my constant urges, I quickly turned him down. His name was Harry and he thought highly of himself, but really, he was just a zitty teenager who had scored the job just because his dad was the boss.

“So Drop, I was thinking… My parents are going out of town. You, me, tonight, my place, drinks, maybe a movie, then hit my bed later on.” It should be a question, but he made it sound like he was telling me what to do.

“You wish bozo,” I replied then signed a script of papers. I went for another set of files, but he set a hoof on them. I looked to him with an irritated look. “What?!” I hissed and he smiled with grotesque yellow teeth. His breath smelt horrid and nearly made me puke.

“You know…” he trailed off and I replied with a roll of my eyes as I tried to grab the file. He pushed his hoof down harder, making it impossible for me to pull it out from under his hoof.

“Harry, I’m serious,” I scowled and he smiled.

“I know, so am I,” he stated. An angered frown came across my face. He licked his lips and leaned over to whisper in my ear. “I can smell your cunt. You need what I got,” he whispered.

I stood up in a fit of rage and bucked him against the wall. “You filthy pig! Get the buck away from me!” I yelled.

“Miss Raindrop! My office, now!” ordered a stone cold voice. My stomach cringed and my heart sank. Mr. Ritherferd, Harry’s father, had just called me into his office after witnessing me kick his son.

I walked along towards his office, my head drooped low as several ponies watched me. I skulked into the room, not even making eye contact. “Close the door behind you and lock it,” he ordered in a stern voice.

I did as he asked and quickly took a seat across from him. “Mr. Rithe…” I began, but he cut me off.

“I apologize for my son’s irresponsible behaviour. I’ll speak to him later,” he apologized. He… apologized… to me? I was lost in thought before he snapped me back to reality.

“But regardless of a colleague’s behaviour, you cannot assault them. Do I make myself absolutely clear?” he asked. I nodded feverishly and he nodded in return. I risked a glance at him to see a stern look on his face.

I gulped and let a nervous chuckle exit my lips. “Sorry Mr. Ritherferd,” I apologized sheepishly with a slight blush.

He nodded but twitched his nose slightly. He then brought his hooves up, resting his elbows on the desk and tapping his hooves together in thought. “Indeed…” he muttered.

“Sir?” I asked. He didn’t say anything and, as I waited, I began admiring him. He was nothing like Harry. He was smart, kind, forgiving… cute. I felt my lower region start to quiver as I started to become rather wet.

It seeped through my jeans, surely staining the nice cushion chair beneath me. My heart once again sank. I was in trouble. “Ms. Drop… it is Miss, isn’t it?” he asked in a different tone.

I was completely taken off guard and I nodded. “Take no offence by this but…” he trailed off and I nodded, waiting for him to ask whatever was on his mind. “What would you say if I said that I’d like you to bend over on my desk and let me rut you?” he asked rather bluntly but seriously. 'Wasn't he married!?' I thought to myself.

I gasped but his facial expression didn’t change. My urges yearned for me to rut and I willingly obliged. I stood up and my fragrance soon filled the room. “Do try to keep quiet though. Others are still working,” he told me as I bent over his desk, wiggling my hind for him.

I had no idea what had gotten into us, but I didn’t care. “Rut me you wild animal,” I teased and he nodded.

“Indeed I shall,” he replied as he too got onto the desk. He pulled his already throbbing cock out from his pants. He quickly made work of my jeans and slid them off, then groped my flanks.

His hooves worked wonders to my rear as he teased my puffy pink slit, sending jolts of pleasure through my body. He took his hoof away and my inner walls clenched, demanding attention. I looked over my shoulder to see him spit onto his hoof. He gave his erection a few gentle strokes before he lined himself up with my rear.

“Just don’t cum inside. I’m in heat and wouldn’t want to get pregnant,” I told him. He smiled lustfully and chuckled.

“Don’t worry about it. You won’t get pregnant from where I’m putting it,” he responded. I was about to voice a reply but was cut off by a wave of pleasure and pain that was mixed together. He had just…

I felt his presence inside my anal cavity as he began to thrust. At first it was uncomfortable, but within moments I started to feel a pleasure wither through my body. It wasn’t the first time I had done anal, though this time it was different because he seemed to know how to handle me.

“Oh yes… you dirty dog,” I moaned as he started thrusting at a steady pace. I matched his pace with my own, feeling him delve deep inside of me with each thrust.

* * *

I had been beating off for the entirety of the story, out of pure necessary urge, despite things not really being all that kinky up until this point. ‘I wonder what would happen if somepony was to take too much of that tetanus potion stuff?’ I wondered to myself.

* * *

My left hoof reached down to my pink slit and I began rubbing myself attentively. My juices dampened my fur, both around my nethers and on my hoof. His hooves wrapped around my ribs as he leaned over and began to pound my ass even harder, each thrust sending a jolt of pleasure throughout my insides.

I moaned softly as he exhaled through his nose. His hot breath sent shivers down my spine, the shiver ending at my tailbone and adding to my internal pleasure.

My hoof found my little fun button and gave it a gentle flick. A sensational shock of warmth was sent through me and caused my anal walls to clench around his cock that was buried deep inside of me. I felt myself building up for my climax. “Oh yeah… give it to me baby… give it to me!” I squealed in delight.

“Sssh… keep it down,” he whispered into my ear. I nodded and lowered my voice. His rhythm started to become less oriented. I knew he was ready, I could just feel it. I began slamming myself harder against his hips.

The sound of his balls slapping against my now dampened ass cheeks filled the room. Our two paces lost track of each other and it became a scene of primal love making. His grunts nearly matched the sound of our wet, sloppy sex.

I felt his hooves dig into my sides with a tightening grip as he grunted. His breath was hot and sent more shivers down my spine. He let out a more powerful grunt as his head rested against the back of my neck.

He started taking himself to the hilt, delving deeper into my ass with each thrust, all the while grunting heavily. “Ss-ssh!” I giggled. “Or they’ll hear you.” He didn’t reply. A pressure started building up inside of me and…

* * *

I felt the pressure build up in my cock and I didn’t try to hold back. I blew a second load though this time there was considerably less cum. Two lone spurts launched out. The first splattered against the picture of Raindrop. The second smeared across the story.

Though my primal urges were gone, I kinda wanted to know how the story ended. I wiped away the smear of cum then used the hospital gown to dry my hand of before I continued to read the story.

* * *

And I let out a long pleasured moan. I slammed my ass hard against his cock, driving him deeper than ever before. I felt a warm liquid seep from my twitching cunt and ooze onto my hoof.

My anal walls began to clamp around his shaft. He grunted with an ‘Ugh!’ My vaginal walls clamped around nothing and felt deprived while my anus relished in the feel of my ongoing orgasm. I gave a few gentle thrusts which drove me deeper into my orgasm, and drove him to a new height of pleasure.

He gently bit into the back of my neck and gave more powerful thrusts. His grip around my ribs started to feel a bit uncomfortable as he started to reach his peak.

I relished the moment, rubbing my juices all over my belly. Mr. Ritherferd stopped suddenly and pulled his shaft out from my ass. A feeling of emptiness filled my gaping hole, making me moan in need.
He gasped as he began jerking himself off. I quickly spun around and lunged forwards, plunging his cock into my mouth. “UGH!” Was all he managed as I deep throated his entire length. It only took a moment before I felt his cock swell up inside my throat, restricting air from entering my lungs. I felt his warm seed burst from his tip like a volcano, and seep down my throat ever so slowly.

The cock shoved further down my throat, along with the spooge, threatening to trigger my gag reflex. I started to bob my head back and forth, massaging his length with my mouth.

After a few moments, his cock stopped throbbing and he pulled himself out. A trail of cum connected my mouth and the tip of his now shrinking rod. I licked my lips and smiled. After all, ‘This was just another day in the…

* * *

I was about to read the final punch line but a knock on my window made me jump. “GAH!” I yelled out and looked over, only to see a set of crisscrossed eyes looking at me.

Derpy had a genuine smile on her face as she waved to me. I tossed the magazine aside and sighed as I leaned the seat forwards then stepped out of the vehicle. I didn’t bother concealing my erection since she had obviously seen it while I was jerking off… or maybe she hadn’t.

“How long were you watching Derpy?” I asked.

“Since the part about her saying, ‘Just another day at work.’ I think it was the beginning,” she stated innocently. “It was a weird story, but it was kind of nice. Did they live happily ever after in the end?” she asked and I shrugged.

“It didn’t say,” I replied. She frowned with a slight sign of displeasure.

“Well that’s not fair. What happened after?” she asked and I shrugged, again it didn’t say. “Well that’s not fair either. How are we supposed to know what happened to them after?” Derpy asked and I shrugged again.

“I guess we just imagine what happens,” I replied and she crossed her hooves in a childish manner. “Well… so uhm?” I asked and she looked to me curiously. “What’s up?” I asked and she looked up.

“The roof,” she replied and I rolled my eyes.

“I mean, how are you?” I asked and she gave a ‘so-so’ motion with her right hoof. “That’s good. So… if you don’t mind me asking, what brought you around?” I asked, kind of wondering why she had watched me jerk off without telling me.

“Oh yeah! That’s right. You got some mail,” she stated as she pulled out a large yellow envelope that was tucked under her wing. “I meant to give it to you earlier, but I didn’t know you were in the hospital. Then I went to give it to you at the hospital, but you weren’t there either. So I came back here and found you reading a book, except nopony was listening to you read so I decided to hear you read,” she stated.

“Why not just leave the mail with Twilight?” I asked. She brought her hoof up as to make a statement then blushed and set her hoof back down.

“Because…” she trailed her hoof around on the ground sheepishly. I waited for a moment before getting my reply. “Because I like talking to you. You’re one of the only ponies who talk to me when I deliver mail. Heck, you’re one of the only ponies that actually talk to me,” she replied rather sadly.

My heart lurched for the saddened mare and I knelt down before bringing her into a snug, gentle hug. “Of course I talk to you Derpy. You’re awesome,” I told her. She leaned back from the hug, her eyes gleaming with happy tears.

“You mean that?” she asked in her dopey voice.

“Well duh. Why else would I talk to you? You’re one of the coolest ponies I know. And besides, I can usually relate to you,” I replied and she tilted her head to one side with a wondering look. “When you’re around, it makes me feel better about being dopey. Especially with Twilight. She’s a friggin super genius or something and it always makes me feel really dumb,” I replied.

Her face quickly returned to that of a saddened one. “You… you think I’m dumb?” she whimpered and I quickly shook my head.

“Nononononono! Not at all,” I sputtered out, gaining her attention. “I’m just saying that…” I trailed off as I thought about how to approach this. She took my pause as if I was trying to think up a lie.

“You do think I’m stupid. You’re just trying to think up a lie!” she sobbed. I brought my hands over my face, only to scrunch my nose as I realized they smelt like my dick.

“No Derpy, that’s not what I meant. What I was trying to say is that I always seem to get in odd predicaments that Twilight scolds me about. And that makes me feel stupid, but I have nopony to talk to about it. But with you I feel like I have somepony who knows how I feel, so I know I’m not the only one out there who feels like they’re stupid but I know that I'm just different…” I trailed off, not really understanding what I had just said. I tried to say what was in my head, it just didn’t come out the same.

She blinked and hugged me tightly. “You really mean that?” she asked and I nodded. “So we’ll be friends for as long as we live?” she asked and again I nodded. “Tail twist swear?” she asked and I gulped.

“Ugh… maybe not now Derpy,” I stated hesitantly. She gave a pouty frown.

“Why not?” she pouted and I scratched the back of my head in embarrassment.

“I uhh… kind of… uhm…” I stammered, not knowing how to approach this.

“You can tell me. Were the best of friends remember?” she told me and I blushed heavily as I slowly and nervously brushed aside part of the hospital gown. My throbbing shaft was only in view for a single moment before I tucked it away.

“There are… slight side effects to tetanus potions… including, but not limited to… raging boners and uncontrollable urges,” I told her. A slight blush reddened her face as she looked away.

“Oh… well that’s okay, we’re only bumping flanks,” she stated as she stood up, pulling me up with her. She spun me around then gave my rump a bump with her own, though rather than just a bump, she rubbed her’s against mine a little more attentively. For a brief moment I felt her bare flank rub against my balls, sending a twitch of pleasure through my body and making my right leg stiffen. “Tail Twist Swear,” she said enthusiastically.

“Yeah… Tail Twist Swear,” I stated, albeit, less enthusiastically. I turned and she hugged me tightly. My boner was pressed up between our bodies, giving me a mentally uncomfortable yet physically pleasured feeling.

“See yah later Evan. Don’t worry, I won’t tell anypony about your… thing,” she said as she made the motion to zip her lips shut and throw away the key. I smiled slightly and gave her a wave as she flew off.

The contact with her had driven my urges through the roof again. Regretfully, I had an urge to fantasize about my grey pegasus friend. “Oh please… not Derpy. She’s too innocent,” I muttered to myself. I hopped back into my truck and began jerking off my already stiff shaft as I began to fantasize about my grey pegasus friend. “You sick fuck! She’s your friend… I shouldn’t lust for her…” but before I could finish scolding myself, I was lost into my fantasy.

* * *

I cradled the grey mare beneath me. Though her eyes were criss-crossed, they had a look of stunning beauty in them. I gently cradled both our bodies to the soft sheets of a bed.

My breathing was steady and controlled, while hers was a little nervous. “Don’t worry Derpy. I won’t hurt you,” I told her. She nodded and her hindlegs slowly slid apart, revealing her nethers to me.

My hospital gown draped over both our bodies as I steadied my cock by her entrance. I slowly placed my tip to her lips and we both let out a unison gasp from the pleasure that coursed through our bodies.

“Derpy…” I trailed off. I lowered my face to hers and we connected our lips. Her tongue delved into my mouth, and mine into hers, and we began a battle of the tongues. As we duked it out with our tongues, I slowed myself into her love tunnel.

She pulled back from the kiss with a deep gasp of pleasure. I crept myself into her crevice inch by inch until my entire length was inside of her. We relished in the feeling of our bond before I began to creep out of her, all the while enjoying the desirable feeling to just slam my length back inside of her and make us whole again.

As I pulled my length out of her, I looked down to her slit, only to see it twitching with the need to be filled again. “Evan,” Derpy began in her dopey, yet lustful, voice. “Can you put it in me again? That felt really good,” she asked. I willingly obliged and slowly plunged myself back inside of her.

Her inner walls enveloped my cock and massaged it gently with inner muscles. Slowly clasping and unclasping, her cunt felt like it was trying to milk me. I pulled back, though not completely out of her, then slide back in.

Derpy let out a sigh as she smiled in pleasure then pulled my face to hers. She didn’t kiss me at first, instead she slid her tongue up along the side of my neck, sending shivers down my back and aiding in the build up of that was growing inside of me.

Her tongue slithered up my neck, around my throat, up my chin, then, ever so slowly, she pushed her tongue through my lips. Her tongue immediately darted to the back of my throat as she explored my depths.

I continued my gentle thrusts into her now soaking hole that continued to massage my cock. A hum of pleasure left her mouth but was trapped in our connected mouths. I gave a more masculine moan back and she giggled then pulled back from the kiss.

“That was funny,” she giggled and I raised an eyebrow. “You made a funny sound,” she giggled again and I rolled my eyes from her playful nature.

Her hindlegs suddenly wrapped tightly around my waist and she pulled me in tight as she began to slam her hips against mine. “Oooh… I feel something inside of me,” she whispered to me.

I continued to pound my hips against hers and she began squealing in delight. “Oooh… oooh this feels good… oh my gosh… OH!” she moaned.

“Uhm… Derpy… have you ever done this before?” I asked and she nodded.

“Yeah but it hurt…and I bled a bit… and it didn’t feel this good,” she replied then began an even faster pace. My hands shifted to her small, soft, perky nipples. I gave them gentle squeezes and she began to squeal even more.

Her body stiffened up and began jerking as her hindlegs spasmed, trying desperately to stay clasped around my waist. I felt her inner walls clasp tightly around my shaft and the muscles inside of her also twitched wildly.

A fluid squeezed past my cock and lathered my groin. The slapping sound of my shaft slamming her cunt echoed in the room as I started to reach my maximum. My right leg started to twitch and spasm as Derpy wrapped her forelegs around my back and pulled my into a tight hug.

Our lips connected and moans were exchanged as I joined in her orgasm. My fluids spat out and mixed with hers as I laced her insides with my hot cum. I gave a few last jerky thrusts before stopping and keeping myself just inches inside her body.

We pulled away from the kiss, both of us panting heavily. Our gazes connected and we both smiled in dopey ways.

* * *

The pressure build up in my groin reached its peak and I felt myself start to twitch. Again, a considerably less amount of cum shot out, though it was still enough to make another stain mark in the hospital gown as I wiped off my hand.

I shook my head with self-disappointment. She was one of my best friends… and she was so innocent. My gaze soon shifted to outside my truck. Derpy paced along happily through the streets of Ponyville without a care in the world.

‘I bet if I asked… she’d fuck me right now,’ my dirty conscious thought. “You… can go to fuckin hell, cause it ain’t happenin’,” I hissed. As if by second nature, my left hand started to make its way for the door lever.

My right hand clenched and I slammed a powerful punch across my head that sent my equilibrium completely off balance. My head rocked to the left as my vision was dazed. I hadn’t let myself tense up to be ready for a hit, and now I was suffering the consequences, though they were probably better than letting my more primal side run rampant.

“That’s what you get you sick fuck,” I hissed at myself. I considered hitting myself again for fantasizing about Derpy in the way I had but, in the end, figured that to be a bit irrational.

I slowly sat back up and my wandering gaze turned to the mail that Derpy had brought me. “I wonder what this is about…” I muttered as I cut it open with my bowie knife.

Despite the large package, there was just a simple letter that read:

Dear Mr. Burdy,
It is the F&F Brothers. We have hit a small snag and request your immediate assistance. Please meet us by the fuel loading yard where we filled up your truck with diesel.

Yours truly,
Flim and Flam, though you already knew that.

I folded the note back up and sighed before hitting my head against the steering wheel, resulting in the horn going off.

I let the horn blare for a moment or two before pulling my head back and groaning. My truck was fuckered, I was horny and…

Someone tapped on the window, gaining my attention. I looked over to see Twilight standing on her hindlegs, looking into my truck. I twisted the key backwards in the ignition so I could use the electric windows.

Twilight’s nose twitched as she caught wind of the stank smell from the inside of my truck. “Ech… what smells?” she asked as she held a hoof over her nose.

I let out a depressed sigh and rubbed my forehead attentively. “I’ve been jerking off for at least an hour,” I replied. Her face nearly went pale.

“Oh… uhm… I’m sorry. Did I interrupt?” she asked and I shook my head.

“No actually. I was just leaving. I have to find a way to get my mind off these ridiculous urges,” I replied.

“You mean… the sexual ones?” she asked and I nodded with a roll of my eyes. ‘Well duh, what else?’ I thought. “Do you have any idea of what might take your mind off it?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Well Redheart told me that having actual sex would take away the urges for a while, while masturbating on the other hand is more temporary,” I told her.

“Sooo…” she trailed off, wondering what my plan was. “Are you gonna do it?” she asked and I raised an eyebrow. “You know… have sex?” she asked and I let out a stifled laugh.

“Ugh… no. I’m not exactly the type to whore myself out to random mares. Even if I was able to get past the whole ‘I’m having sex with a different species’ thing, I’d still feel bad about doing it with some random mare,” I informed her.

“So how about somepony you know?” she asked and I rubbed my eyes with my right hand as I sighed.

“Well, there’s you, Cheerilee, Derpy, and Applejack. Applejack is more like a boss, so she’s out. Derpy is way too innocent. And although I’ve masturbated with Cheerilee, we’re not actually sexually attracted to each other, at least I don’t think so. So that crosses her out and finishes up the list,” I replied.

“Well what about me?” she asked. There was a moment of very awkward silence. At first it was just me but she joined soon after as well.

“Uhm… You’re not serious… are you?” I asked in a somewhat hesitant voice. She blushed and let out a nervous laugh.

“No… ah-ha-ha…” she continued to laugh nervously. “I was just kidding,” she laughed, though her voice sounded as if she was still nervous about saying it.

“Yeah, cause that’d be awkward,” I shuddered. “I’d never be able to get the thought out of my head if I fucked my mom,” I shivered again.

“Well…” she stammered and trailed off. “I’m not really your mom. You know that,” she stated and I nodded.

“No! Really? Oh, well that makes everything okay,” I said in a very sarcastic voice. She nodded with a slightly hopeful smile. “I know you’re not really my mom, but you’re close enough. I’ve had cows that have kind of been like motherly figures to me, grooming my hair and what not. I would never have even once thought of getting down and dirty with them,” I informed her.

“Well yeah, I mean, it’s a cow. That’s not exactly ethical,” she replied with a small laugh.

“Exactly. Now you see where I stand,” I replied. She scratched her chin.

“Yeah but that was a cow. It’d be different with me,” she replied and I raised an eyebrow.

“Well not really. I mean, you can talk and Autumn couldn’t. Sure she was a cow and you’re a pony, but other than that it’s pretty much the same,” I stated.

“Yeah but… what I’m trying to say is it would be different for us because ponies are like the humans for this world,” she stated. Something kind of half clicked in my head.

“Wait a minute!” I gasped loudly and she gulped. “Are you saying…” I trailed off as my eyes went wide in shock. “Are you saying you… you want me to… with you!?” I gasped in utter shock. I wasn’t sure whether I was embarrassed from asking that or… well, I wasn’t sure what I was thinking.

“Well I… I mean… I kind of…” she stuttered nervously. She looked at my undauntingly blunt face. “No…I-I-I mean yes… I mean, I’m your mom so, yes it would be wrong… what I’m trying to say is… no!” she gasped.

I wiped off my forehead with a ‘phew’. “Oh man. For a second there I thought you wanted me to… well, you know,” I stammered. She blushed.

“No… no way… that’d be… totally wrong… right?” she stammered back.

“Oh man… I mean, female cows have humped me before at the farm back home, but they weren’t intelligent like ponies in Equestria. And I couldn’t imagine how weird it would be if my own mom wanted me,” I laughed shyly. She joined in the awkward laughing before things finally settled.

I lifted up the envelope. “Well… I gotta go meet Flim and Flam at the loading yard. See yah around,” I said to her. Just before I started my truck a thought crossed my mind. “What did you come out here for anyway?” I asked and she thought to herself before blushing.

“Oh… uhm… I… nothing! Nothing, I didn’t need anything!” she replied quickly. I nodded then shrugged.

“Oh… okay. Uhm, Twi?” I asked and she lifted her head, looking directly into my eyes with hers.

“Yes?” she asked in a hushed tone.

“I don’t suppose that…” I trailed off as her eyes gleamed, sparkling with a beautiful purple gleam. My mouth sat slightly gapped open. “Wow… you have beautiful eyes,” I stammered out in a breath taken voice.

It was like I was caught in some kind of trance. Our stare continued to meet and, naturally, our heads started moving towards one another. “Twi… I…” I wasn’t able to piece together words, I was just lost in some kind of… mesmerizing thingy.

As her face neared mine, her eyes slowly began to shut. Mine followed suit but I quickly grasped hold of my body and pulled back with a sharp gasp. I grasped the steering wheel of my truck with a death-like grip. She noticed my action and also pulled back with a similar gasp.

I lightly tapped my head, trying to get the cute and cuddly feelings out of my head. As it wouldn’t leave, I hit myself harder, making stars blur into my vision. “Sorry… I have no idea what just happened,” I told her.

“Me either,” she said, returning to her rather nervous voice. I rubbed my forehead before starting my truck. It sputtered to life rather roughly.

“Hey Twi? Don’t suppose you know somepony who might be able to fix Cadence?” I asked. She thought before shaking her head. “Damn. Well, I gotta meet the brothers,” I informed her then smirked. In my best Schwarzenegger voice, I looked over to her, “I’ll be back.” And then drove off.

* * *

Ponyville Library, third person:

Twilight’s head drooped in failure as she sighed sulkily. Princess Cadence stepped up beside her, rested a hoof on the younger mare’s shoulder, and joined in the depressed sigh. “Wow… I have never met something so… mentally dense. Never before in my life have I met something that can resist that spell. I nearly drained all my energy trying to seduce him for you,” Cadence said with a shocked tone.

“It’s because he truly doesn’t love me. I give up. It just wasn’t meant to be,” Twilight sulked as she flopped down to her haunches. “We just weren’t meant for each other. It wouldn’t have worked anyway,” Twilight continued to sulk to herself. Cadence smiled and sat down next to her young sister-in-law.

“Don’t worry Twilight. We’ll find a way. He’s just confused,” Cadence spoke her thoughts truly and fully. Twilight looked up to Cadence just as her eyes were welling up with tears. “Trust me, we’ll find a way to make him realize that he loves you, even if it takes time,” Twilight smiled slightly and the two embraced in a hug.

* * *

Loading yard, Evan’s perspective:

My truck sat idly by in the loading yard, or whatever this place was. I had rummaged through my duffle bag of clothes, which all smelt like engine fluids. I still had the hospital gown on, but I now also had a pair of blue jeans, that smelt like spooge due to a little urge I had a moment ago.
I looked out to the loading yard. There were container bins here and there, and lamp posts, but no crews. There were two cranes and a small factory… and a scrap metal crusher.

I didn’t have my truck running at the moment, but the battery was on, allowing me to listen to another one of my CD tracks. The tunes of ‘We fight for love’ started playing and I smirked. I leaned the seat back and sighed to myself.

‘If these guys wanted to meet me here, why couldn’t they have just called?’ I thought to myself. As the intro to the song continued, I looked over to the opaque black case labelled ‘Belladonna’.

‘I will protect you,
Nothing can hurt you,
No storm clouds gathering terrify…’

I reached back and picked up the case. It was rather hefty due to the object inside. I flipped open the latch and popped open the case before looking at the ‘investment’ inside. It’s the only word I can think of to call this thing, an investment, due to how much I had spent on her.

Almost as if I was holding some ancient holy relic, I slowly lifted Belladonna out of her case. My left hand gently cradled the front of the barrel while my right gently supported the grip.

‘I am a mountain,
Surrounded by your love,
You are a mountain,
That dreams are made of…’

I hadn’t held her in so long and it felt nearly alien as I gripped her with one hand. The weight… hoo, hoo, the weight. Roughly five pounds, enough to make most people cry and bitch about it, calling her a novelty gun. Ha, a novelty gun. Just about every handgun in Canada might as well be a novelty piece, seeing as how you basically can’t do anything but go to a range with one.

‘We fight for love!
We fight for love!
Fight for love!’

My breathing became raspy as I took her into a two hand grip, pointing the barrel out the window and peering down the sights. I couldn’t control my breathing, not even a little. It was like the first time I held her, all those months ago… an investment.

‘Somewhere, somehow, someone,
Somewhere, somehow, someone…’

The brushed chrome barrel gleamed as I continued to adore her. ‘An investment…’ I thought. ‘Huh… an investment… well at least it gets my mind off masturbating,’ I thought to myself.

‘I fight with fire,
To watch them conspire,
To blow my world apart!’

I brought Belladonna closer to me then brought my left hand up and racked back the slide. I held the slide back and adored the rather unique rifling of the barrel.

‘Between the light,
And the endless night,
You will always be in my heart!’

I let the slide slam shut then once again looked down the sights of my baby… well, one of them anyway. The aftermarket luminescent white sights looked more like something for a movie prop and were kind of useless for me, seeing as how I wouldn’t actually be able to use it at night… well, back on my world anyway. Here however, I wouldn’t use it. Due to the absolute lack of gun shops or dealers, I only used my Russian guns, thanks to the bulk supply of surplus ammo I had.
I took a moment to think about how lucky I had been that not only me, but my guns, truck, and ammo, had all been magically transported to Equestria. “I guess it’s not so bad,” I muttered to myself.

Well, lucky is hardly the word. Lucky would be if I hadn’t ended up in Equestria, but it was better than nothing. I had my guns, ammo for my guns, my truck, and recently, I found a source of fuel for my truck. So in retrospect, it was alright, all things considered.

I held my right thumb against the tip of the hammer and pulled the trigger, then, ever so slowly, de-cocked the hammer. I went to adore the gun further, but a knock on the window took me by surprise.

‘We fight for love,
We fight for love,
Fight for love,
We fight for…’

I shut off the radio and quickly placed Belladonna back in her case then set the closed case on the back floor. Looking out the window, I realized it was the FF brothers, with dorky looks on their faces.

I opened the door and exited the vehicle and, no sooner had I gotten out, then they started their rant song, this time singing about friendship being ever so magical. “Please… no more songs,” I told them. They stopped immediately and nodded.

“Indeed… well, how are you Burdy?” Flim asked enthusiastically and I shrugged.

“Depends on opinion,” I replied and the brothers frowned. “In my opinion?” I asked and they both nodded in reply. “Oh just fine!” I started in an obviously sarcastic voice. “About six months ago… I got transported to a really fucked up world,” I had a stern voice that wasn’t angry but, at the same time, was obviously not a happy voice. “There are ponies that are kind of like what humans were like back on my world except… they’re stuck in some weird multi-era, ranging from the Victorian age all the way to my modern age… and everything in between. That and they have fucking magic abilities. Some can fly while others can cast magic and shit,” I took a deep breath before continuing.

“I later find out I can’t go home because of the inter-dimensional bond that keeps the universe intact. Then some crazy uni-horn pegasus takes me on as her student or something, tries to teach me about magic and friendship or… I don’t know! Whatever! I also find out that they don’t eat meat like bacon or steak because killing animals to harvest their innards is like taboo or some shit,” I took another deep breath before continuing my rant.

“At first everything was so gay to me because it kind of was, compared to my world. Back on my world, governments would fuck each other over for a fuckin’ dime, a fuckin’ dime! I guess in this world it would be like if the pegasus fucked over the earth ponies just to make an extra bit at the end of the year, and you know what?!” I asked aloud. The brothers shook their heads, not knowing what I would say.

“I was fine and dandy with that. Most everyone else complained that our governments were corrupt and unjust, but I knew that would never change, so I accepted that!” I yelled, pointing to myself angrily. “I fucking accepted that and lived with it! I knew I would never be somebody and I accepted that. Sure I had become something, but I still was a nobody! I had made myself into something I was proud about because I was different from the social ‘norm.’ I was big, I was strong and, hell, I had it. I don’t know what ‘IT’ was, but I had it. I was happy,” I yelled, angered that everything had kind of gone shitty.

“Then I get sent here where everypony is like, ‘We all love each other equally,’ or some shit like that, and they take me in like I’m some helpless idiot!” I yelled, and the brothers just continued to listen.

“And now!?...” I yelled as I threw my hands into the air with anger. I let out a depressed sigh and placed my hands over my face in self-disappointment. “Now, I’m finally trying to accept things, and you know what? I’m actually accepting this… this… fucking friendship being magic bullshit thing. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m starting to… well, you know… fit into the community. But I kind of miss my family…” I trailed off and thought about it as my nose scrunched a bit.

“Well kind of… I just want to know if they’re okay, tell them what’s happening…” I trailed off, still thinking about it. “Well… what I mean is… I kind of want to see them just to make sure they’re okay and know that I’m not dead in a ditch somewhere. Hell, I wanna see my dog again,” I stated. I started to get emotional as I thought about my dog.

I shook my right hand. “Never mind about that. So now, I’m just starting to get into society, and things are starting to go good… but it seems every few days I get into trouble and hurt myself when I save somepony. Then Twilight gets mad and flips shit. And NOW?!” I yelled as I threw my hands in the air again.

I simmered my voice down and sighed. “My truck is crapping out on me,” I muttered as I placed my left hand over my face and pointed at my truck with my right. I let out a sigh then looked to them. “So in my opinion?” I asked and they looked down shamefully, regretting even asking how my day was. “I’m doing well, all considered,” I stated in a faked tone of happiness with an equally fake smile.

“What’s wrong with your truck?” they asked and I sighed.

“Exhaust is busted… probably a few other things,” I stated. They scratched their chins then both squealed.

“We can fix your truck!” they stated happily and began to prance around, making up some song about friendship being a business relationship. I raised a confused eyebrow. ‘Why the hell are they so happy?’ I thought to myself. They handed me a folded scrap of paper.

“Do you know where this is?” they asked. I partially unfolded it and looked at the directions. It looked like something from an old pirate treasure map. The map was yellowed from age and felt a bit crispy and fragile.

There were some pictures of a town that looked like Ponyville by the top left. At the top right was what looked like a valley gorge or something with a mountain. In the middle was what looked kind of like an entrance to a crummy old store or maybe… a cave tunnel.

Finally, near the bottom right, was a stack of crates and at the top was a smaller crate that was circled in red. I thought about it for a moment.

It kind of looked like directions to a part of… “I know where this is,” I stated, realizing it looked like Ghastly Gorge.

“Excellent. We’ll make you a trade. You retrieve the package, and we fix your truck,” they offered. It was an offer I couldn’t refuse.

“OH-HO, deal!” I stated happily as I continued to browse over the map. The rumble of my truck instantly caught my attention and I realized that they were driving off with my truck.

“HEY! HEY-HEY!” I yelled frantically as I tried chasing them. “HEY WAIT!” I screamed, but they were already putting distance between us. “WAIT, HEY WAIT…” I trailed off as they continued off, completely ignoring me. Either that or they didn’t notice me.

I tossed my hands into the air, throwing the map into the air as well. “MOTHER FUCKERS! As if nopony else in Equestria even knows what a truck is, and these two fuckers are able to start it, even somehow knowing about the naughty key… AND THEY DON’T EVEN OFFER ME A FUCKING RIDE BACK TO TOWN!” I roared, hoping that they could hear my anger.

I watched as the plume of dust left into the distance. I looked to my left and realized that Ponyville was in the opposite direction that they were travelling. “Well they still could’ve offered me a ride back to town.” I muttered then realized something even more awful.

“YOU FUCKERS STILL HAVE MY GUNS!” I roared at the top of my vocal capacity, realizing that my toolboxes were still hitched on the truck box. ‘How am I supposed to travel through Ghastly Gorge without even a single gun to protect myself with?’ I thought to myself.

I looked to my hip. All I had was the bowie knife in my hip sheath and my old buck knife in my ankle sheath. “Well… as long as I don’t run into any Timberwolves… I guess I’ll be okay,” I muttered.

I looked around the abandoned loading yard. I spotted what looked like a check-in and paced over to it. The door was rusty and the knob wouldn’t even turn. ‘If nopony runs this yard… does that mean the diesel is bad?’ I thought, and then thought more about how my truck was running lately. It didn’t run bad, or bog down or anything. I shook of the thought and booted the door down.

The rusty, dilapidated old door hit the floor with a loud clanging sound, but nopony was around to scream in shock. I walked into the small check-in station and was surprised to see what looked like a very old and stale plain doughnut and a dilapidated coffee cup that was made out of a cardboard substance.

The coffee cup read ‘Tim Horsetons.’ I chuckled to myself as I remembered the Tim Hortons back on my world. “Ahh, how the great have fallen,” I muttered as I flicked away the coffee cup.

To my disgusted surprise, it had nasty old coffee that splashed against the wall and released a horrid stink. I picked up the doughnut, a scrap piece of paper and a pencil, then left the check-in.

I sniffed the doughnut and frowned. ‘God… well, I guess in this world it was Celestia, so… Celestia only knows how old this doughnut is,’ I thought to myself. Judging by the look, it wasn’t rotten… but seeing as how a lot of the machinery around here was rusty… I’d say it was pretty damn old.

‘Wait… if the machinery is old…’ I trailed off my thoughts and looked to the fuel pumps. They looked rather new and out of place. It was weird how the lamps were also rusty but still worked at night. ‘Who the hell runs this place?’ I thought to myself.

I took a bite of the ancient doughnut and frowned as I tasted the bitter staleness of it. Still, it didn’t taste rotten, just stale. I took another bite and chewed it down. The taste was bland and the staleness was the only real taste in it. I finished it with one last chomp and swallowed.

“Ech… note to self: stale, plain doughnuts don’t taste great… I wonder if the chocolate ones taste better stale,” I mused then set the paper against the check in station wall and began to write a letter to Twilight.

Dear Princess of Sparkleness,

Today I figured out something awful about friendship. Sometimes, when your friends ask you for help, you naturally lend a helping hand, or hoof, or whatever. But when you agree to help them, they leave with your truck, leaving you stranded several kilometers from town. Sometimes friendship is an awful thing that feels more like a business relationship with you at the bottom because they have leverage on you and have left you without a way to help them.

From all the way out in the middle of nowhere,

Burdy

P.S. Doughnuts that are obviously over four years old don’t taste that good. Well, the plain ones don’t taste good anyway. I’ll try to find another one for you so you can try it.

Chapter 10

‘Well why the hell didn’t you tell me that in the first place…’

Several hours later…

It was getting late and the evening sun was just getting to the western horizon. I let out a sigh as I skidded down the gorge side and to the floor of ‘Ghastly Gorge.’

I had to jog back to Ponyville to get some fresh clothes. Something told me that adventuring through a gorge in a cum stained hospital gown and jeans was a stupid idea.

I had dumped the hospital gown and traded it with one of my few shirts that I had from back on my world. The shirt was black and there was a bald white buff guy with his arms crossed with a big dopey smile displayed on the shirt. There was also some red writing that stated: Don’t fuck with Mr. Clean.

It wasn’t quite adventuring clothing but I always got a laugh out of the t-shirt. I also got some faded blue jeans and strapped my belt on, along with the Bowie knife sheathed on my hip and the buck knife in its ankle sheath.

Spike had been home, but he said that Twilight had gone out with Cadence. I had scrunched my nose then quickly remembered that there was a princess here with the same name as my truck, and I did remember briefly meeting a princess with the same name when I first arrived in this world.

In the end, when I finally got to Ghastly Gorge, my boner had finally worn off and it was time to get serious, though I had no idea where to start looking in this gorge. I took out the map and scratched my head as I looked at the map.

Other than depicting that it was somewhere in a cave in the gorge, there wasn’t much to go on. A howl echoed through the gorge and made me shiver. “Man, without guns I feel completely naked,” I muttered to myself.

“Exactly Snake. Just as your name implies, you’re naked. Leave no evidence that you were ever here,” I muttered jokingly in a Major Zero voice. I continued to crack wise-ass jokes as I moseyed through the gorge.

“Man, this is ridiculous. I’ll never find this thing,” I muttered to myself. I took out the map and began looking it over for any clues I might have missed, still walking along as I browsed its contents.

I took the map away from my view as I shook my head. “Man, this is never going to…” I trailed off as I found myself standing at the entrance to a dark, gloomy cave. I quickly pulled the map back up, then looked to the cave, then back to the map, to the cave…

I continued this motion for at least two minutes, looking in disbelief and a bit of curiosity. “Huh…” I mused then folded the map and set it in my pocket. “Well that was easy,” I muttered as I entered the cave.

I could barely see, even at the entrance of the cave. I tried to squint my eyes, but it was no use, the cave was just black. As I continued along, I held my hands out in front of me, trying to feel the wall.

“It can’t be that far into the cave… I mean the map only made it look like a straight path so...” I trailed off into my thoughts as I continued along. Suddenly I heard stone grinding stone and stopped with a deep gulp. My right foot had just stepped on some sort of death trap stone or something.

Before I could mutter a swear, a bunch of torches lit up along the walls of the cave. I looked back to see that I hadn’t even gone fifty yards into the cave. “Figures,” I muttered as I picked one of the lit torches off the wall.

I continued down the cave for another few minutes before coming to a fork in the path. “Oh for fuck’s sake. The map didn’t say anything about forks in the path,” I cursed harshly to myself then mindlessly went right.

I continued on for what felt like hours, though it was probably only a few minutes. “Man, in movies, caves are so cool. They have bats, vampires, and stones rolling through the cave that are the exact same size as the tunnel and…” I continued listing the great Hollywood effects of caves as I continued down the cave tunnel.

As I entered a wide open clearing in the cavern, a voice called to me. “HEY! You, yeah you! A little help!” called a voice. It sounded a little like Rainbow Dash. I looked to see a light brown pegasus with a streaked black mane. Parts of her mane were a faded black shade while other parts were darker, her tail following the colour scheme that her mane had.

I walked over to the mare who was entangled in a heavy netting. She squirmed about to try and get free while I raised an eyebrow. “Well don’t just stand there! Get me out of here!” she yelled.

I set the torch down and cut her loose. She stood up and brushed off her shoulders. “Phew, I thought I was done for sure,” she stated. “I must’ve triggered a trap or something. The net just came out of nowhere,” she told me then raised an eyebrow as she examined my frame and rather peculiar clothing.

“So… you’re Mr. Clean, I presume?” she asked and I rolled my eyes. “Why did you come down here in the first place? Everypony knows that Ghastly Gorge is dangerous,” she told me.

I shrugged and was about to reply when something caught my immediate attention. “SHIT! DUCK!” I yelled and pulled both our bodies to the side as a scorpion tail swung through the air. I rolled onto my back and we were both speechless as a massive Emperor Scorpion lashed its overly large stinger about.

“Crap…” was all the mare beside me muttered. I nodded and rolled to the right as she rolled left. The massive stinger slammed into the ground, creating a gruesome crater where our bodies had been only moments before.

I rolled to my feet and got my Bowie knife ready, then realized that I was severely outmatched. The creature stabbed its front claws into the ground, shaking the ground floor of the cavern and forcing a crater into the world’s rocky surface.

A spear zipped through the air and collided with one of its front claws. The creature limped its claw briefly before turning its attention to the brown pegasus. “Yeah, over here!” she yelled.

In a purely horrifying act, the creature cocked its legs at the knee joints then lept at least fifteen yards, quickly closing the gap between itself and the pegasus mare in one single leap. The impact force of its body hitting the ground knocked the mare down and it quickly pinned her to the ground with its good front claw. Its mandibles clacked and dripped out a disgusting looking viscous fluid.

I was already moving as the freakish creature was cocking back its tail. The mare’s eyes went wide as she gasped in horror. With just under three yards between the scorpion and myself, I took a leap of faith and latched onto its lashing tail.

Before it could react, I quickly started hacking at the stinger joint with my Bowie knife. Green bug juices squirted out with each hack, along with chunks of the creature’s exoskeletal skin. The scorpion flung its tail, sending me crashing into a stone wall with a pained grunt.

Its tail lashed about, but I had severed it just enough that its lashing caused the stinger to fling off. The scorpion slammed its claws into the ground but before it could charge, the brown pegasus lept onto the creature’s body and slammed a spear right above its row of eyes.

The scorpion’s entire body just crumpled. I wiped the green sticky goo off on my faded jeans and let out a relieved sigh. The mare walked over and offered me her hoof. I graciously took it and stood up. “So, what’s your name and why are you here?” she asked sternly.

I smirked with a chuckle. “So that’s the thanks I get for saving your life?” I asked and she quickly became sour about the subject.

“You did not! I was already breaking myself out. Now answer the question, or else!” she threatened.

“Or else what?” I asked, somewhat mockingly. She brought a spear tip up to my throat, the tip itself was dampened with something.

“This is Emperor Scorpion neurotoxin. I stab you with this and you’ll be dead in less than ten minutes,” she threatened. I brought my hands into the air as if to surrender.

“Okay, shit, you made your point,” I replied. Her muscles relaxed, and although the spear was still to my throat, I knew this was my chance. My right hand shot to the left side of the spear shaft in an instant and jerked it to the right, taking her completely off guard.

In the same fluid motion, I began swinging the spear shaft downwards, towards her knees. I grabbed the bottom end of the spear shaft, which was now level with my face. I grave the bottom of the spear and effortful pull while I pushed the top end towards her. The shaft connected with her legs and began to trip her off balance. The swift motion tripped the mare’s legs out from under her and flipped her back first onto the ground.

She went to move but I placed my foot on her chest and the spear tip by her neck. “Don’t move or I’ll stick yah,” I threatened. She gulped and I stepped back. Snapping the spear over my knee and tossing the two pieces aside before I helped her up, though she was reluctant for my help.

“So why are you here?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Me and my bosses have an arrangement,” I informed her.

“What does he want it for?” she asked and I shrugged again.

“How the hell should I know. I don’t really care either. I just need the crate,” I told her and she rolled her eyes with a sigh.

“Well you should’ve just told me that in the beginning,” she muttered in an agitated voice.

“Well you shouldn’t have threatened me with a spear,” I snapped back.

“You shouldn’t have provoked me,” she argued back. I was about to make a comeback but then just let out a deep exhale.

“Never mind. I’m Burdy,” I said as I extended my hand. She shook it and nodded.

“Daring, Daring Do. Come on, the chest is this way,” she told me and began ushering me down a path. She grabbed the only lit torch to light our way and I went first.

As I turned the corner of the path I realized it was a dead end. “Hey what the fu…” I trailed off as I turned and noticed her slamming a cell door shut. “WHAT THE FUCK!?” I yelled.

“Sorry. I can’t take any chances with you. If Rufus has hired you to retrieve this, then you’re obviously bad news,” she told me.

“Rufus? Who the fuck is Rufus?” I yelled.

“Your boss. The one who sent you here. He collects ancient relics and sells them on the black market when they should be put in museums,” she told me. ‘Oh hey cool, this place has a black market. Who knew?’ I thought to myself before getting back on topic.

“WHAT?! My bosses are Flim and Flam!” I yelled. She stepped back and shook her head.

“They’re probably middle stallions. Sorry, but I’m not taking any chances,” she stated then paced away with the only lit torch.

“Hey! How am I supposed to get out of here?!” I yelled and she shook her head.

“Like I said, I can’t take chances with you. If you don’t want to die of dehydration, you might think about slitting your wrists, or maybe your throat,” she offered a possible, yet brutal, suggestion. As she left the cavern, everything dimmed to absolute darkness.

“Fuck… Fuck… FUCK!” I yelled as I gripped the cell bars in a frantic manner. “Oh man… oh man… if only I had a gun…” I whispered. My mind began to panic. 'What am I going to do? I'm sooo screwed!' I thought silently to myself. My thoughts quickly shifted over to who was responsible for all of this and my panic quickly became hatred. “DARING, I HOPE YOU CAN HEAR ME CAUSE WHEN I BREAK OUT AND FIND YOU, I’M GONNA RIP YOUR FUCKING HEART OUT!” I roared. My voice echoed throughout the cavern.

‘In a bit of a predicament?’ my conscience laughed sarcastically.

“I don’t have time for this,” I snarled as I gripped the bars of the cell.

‘Oh… I think you do. We’ll be here until you dehydrate and die,’ my conscience laughed. ‘And all because you wanted to save yet another pony, who in the end stabbed you in the back,’ my conscience laughed snidely. I began to tense up angrily, my senses reaching a new high. My vision started to become shaky, and blurry.

I grunted angrily as I pulled on the bars. I was so pissed. At myself, at my conscience… At Daring. I heard a faint crack of stone above the cell gate. I settled down for a moment and quickly reached up to feel the cold stone roofing of the cell.

The stone was decrepit, eroded… weak. I grabbed the cell bars and gave an animalistic snarl as my eyesight sharpened. “I’ll see you around… Daring,” I snarled. My mind became fuzzy as fury ripped through my body. My muscles flexed to their maximum and I could feel my body tense tightly as I began to pull back on the cell doors.

The stone started cracking and little bits of stone fell from above the cell door. I let out one final primal roar before the cell door broke free and I fell back, the cell door crashing on top of me.

I brushed aside the heavy cell door and realized that, despite getting out, I had no way of finding her. I began crawling across the ground, feeling with my hands to try and find a way out, or after Daring. There were only two paths, three if you count the dead end jail cell. One leading out, and one leading to… Daring.

I caught a glimpse of a green glow. I scampered over only to realize it was the Scorpion’s blood. ‘Scorpion blood glows?’ I thought to myself. I looked beside the Scorpion and noticed that it gave enough light to dimly light about five yards from its illumination. I grabbed a small stone and lathered it in the glowing scorpion blood then used it to light my way.

“Here I come Daring,” I snarled as my more animalistic side began to take over.

* * *

Deeper in the cave tunnel, third person:

Daring had heard his threat, and although she knew he was locked away to perish, the threat had sent shivers throughout her body, and nearly into her very soul. Every so often she’d look back to make sure he hadn’t somehow broken out.

Daring reached a set of stone stairs and began descending them, the torch in her right hoof leading the way.

As she continued down the stairs, they turned to gold and Daring gasped and examined the golden steps. “Pe… Peg Leg,” she whispered. She took a glance to her left and noticed an unlit torch with a rail beside it.

She dipped her flaming torch into the unlit one and the flame caught, not just to the torch, but the rail as well. She stepped back as the flame whizzed down the rail and began to illuminate the entire secret cavern.

The rail stayed lit in the places the flame crossed as it began a spectacular display. “Somepony really spent time on this,” Daring muttered as she watched the spectacle. After five minutes, the entire secret cavern was lit in an ominous and Egyptian like lighting style.

“Huh… Peg Leg must’ve like the Pharaohs…” Daring mused as she descended the rest of the stairs. In the middle of the cavern was a massive old pirate ship, with an abundance of gold bullions surrounding it. The ship itself sat high off the ground, standing nearly twenty feet above the floor of the cavern.

Daring reached the ship and rested a hoof on the hull, admiring its beauty and heritage. “Oh Celestia… the museum is going to flip when I show them this,” she said with a smirk.

An animalistic roar echoed in the cavern, one that would be on par with an angry grizzly bear. Daring quickly whipped around but didn’t even have time to flinch as the brute of a man that she had locked up earlier, slammed her body through the decrepitly weak hull.

Daring cringed in pain as her body lay flat against the floor of the ship. She managed to sit up and scowled at the snarling man, fury burning in his eyes like a wild fire. “You… dunce… that was a piece of… HISTORY!” Daring hissed.

The man’s lips curled like a vicious dog as he snarled. “Yeah, well I got news for yah bub. When I’m done with yah, yah can join in on the history. They’ll find your bones here a hundred years from now and wonder what killed yah. They’ll probably think it was a bear,” he snarled.

Daring managed to stand up, but that was all she managed. The man tackled her through a support beam that shattered into matchsticks as the momentum force splintered the wood apart.

Evan released her body, letting it crash and tumble across the floor. “Usually I’d have qualms about hitting mares, but… you ain’t no mare. No mare would leave somepony to rot in a cell in a deep dark cavern,” he snarled.

“You’re forgetting something,” she spat. “You’re not a pony. You’re an ugly creature hired to do the dirty work,” she taunted him. He charged forwards and snatched her off the ground then tossed her through the other end of the feeble hull. Daring’s body smashed through the hull and she grimaced in pain as she tasted blood dribbling in her mouth from a split lip.

Daring heard footsteps crushing splintered wood behind her but didn’t need to see it. She saw all she needed to see. Her wings sprang out painfully and she darted up and back towards the ship, specifically to the captain’s quarters.

Evan looked up and unsheathed both his knives and used them like ice picks as he ascended up the weak hull of the ship.

Daring burst through the captain’s doors and winced in pain. Frantically looking side to side, she began pulling apart dressers, pulling out drawers, tipping over desks, until finally, she found it.

Under the bed was an old brown trinket chest with a little lock on it. There was an inscription that had ‘Peg Leg’ in cursive writing. “Peg Leg’s insignia!” Daring whispered excitedly. She smiled as she placed it into her saddle bags. As she turned, she noticed the tall figure standing in the doorway, his body dimly lit by the lighting outside.

“I have reason to believe that belongs to my boss,” Evan stated. Daring took a step back but found herself pressed up against the wall of the bedroom. “Now we can do this the easy way, or…” Evan trailed off calmly, letting Daring make the decision.

Daring darted to the left and grabbed a night lamp, swinging it at him like a small mace. Evan rolled his eyes. “So be it,” he replied subtly then charged forwards and crashed both their bodies through the wall and off the ship. The fall was only ten feet luckily, thanks to the large hoard of gold bullions.

Evan was just getting up as Daring’s wings sprang out and she flew out from under him. “Shit,” he muttered in a deep tone as she began to make her escape. The big man looked back to the ship with a blunt expression.

Daring was heading for the exit when suddenly a cannon shot went off and the exit erupted in a fiery explosion. Daring gasped and looked back to see the man operating one of the many cannons on the ship.

“You idiot! You just locked us in!” she yelled but a second shot went off and erupted behind her. She didn’t need another shot to know, he was shooting to kill.

Daring darted across the roof of the cavern and a third shot erupted and shook the entire cavern. Cavern stalactites began to fall to the ground as the place began to fall apart.

Daring looked to the blood crazed man. “You’re insane! You’ve doomed us both!” she roared.

“YOU TRIED TO KILL ME!” he roared back and fired another shot that blew a nice hole through the ceiling of the cavern. Daring took the window of opportunity and dashed towards it.

Evan manned a new cannon and took aim, but by the time he got it sighted towards her, she flew out through the top of the cavern opening. Evan swore angrily to himself then looked to the side walls of the cavern.

The ruckus had awoken several of the overly large scorpions from their hibernation. Dozens upon dozens of Emperor Scorpions swarmed towards the ship. Evan looked to the side of the cavern and thought to himself. He looked to the hole in the roof of the ceiling, then back to the walls.

He swung the cannon and aimed it on a downwards angle and fired. The cannon shot erupted and blew a hole out the side of the cavern walls, revealing the outside world.

The big man looked around and thought about his options before looking to a small anchor and rope.

Outside, Daring peacefully descended down the side of the waterfall, letting its mist dampen her sore body. She could hear eruptions inside the cavern, most likely the ship’s hover ion engines erupting from damage being caused by falling debris.

She smirked as she knew that the thing inside was undoubtedly dead. Before she could react, an anchor fired through the wall of the cliffside almost like a harpoon, then pulled back and latched into the rock side.

Daring looked and noticed that the anchor had been placed right above a massive hole in the cliff. She looked through the gaping hole and saw the man ziplining down a rope attached to the anchor, using an old war spear to support him as he slid downwards.

He was way too close at this point and all Daring managed to say was, “That crazy bastar…” before the man lept off the zip line and flew directly into the pegasus, careening both their bodies down to the deep river below.

* * *

Evan’s perspective:

Our bodies both slammed into the unforgiving water below. Pain seared through my body, but I quickly got my bearings together and looked for the cruel pegasus that had tried to trap me and leave me for dead.

I spotted her in the water just as debris started to slam into the water. Mostly stone and rock debris, but I noticed a few gold bullions in the mix. I swam through the murky water and grabbed three bullions before grabbing the cruel pegasus mare. I waited a moment for most of the debris to crash into the water before surfacing for air.

Debris continued to fall, but the biggest pieces had already fallen. I swam for the sandy shore and began getting my thoughts together.

I dropped the mare’s body into the sand, but she wasn’t breathing. “Oh no…” I muttered. I knelt down and cupped my hands together before giving her chest powerful compressions.

“Oh no you don’t. I’m not letting you die like this you miserable piece of shit!” I scowled as I continued to pump her chest. I stopped for a minute and listened for her breathing. Nothing.

“Fuck… come on you bitch… don’t fucking die on me…” I hissed as I began pumping her chest again. ‘15 compressions, then breathing,’ my conscience thought. I stopped as I realized that I might have to do mouth to mouth to bring her back.

I looked at the seemingly lifeless mare and scrunched my nose. I looked around with a look of disgust then shook my head. “Yeah… no,” I stated then slammed a powerful thrust into her chest.

Her body jerked and she vomited up water from her lungs. I rolled her body over and let her puke out the rest of the water in her lungs. After all the water was gone, she continued to gag for a minute or two before taking several deep breaths.

She slowed her breathing then looked over to me as I stood up. “What… why?” she asked in a breath-taken voice. I picked her up by the hide of her neck with just my right hand, letting her body dangle at eye level.

“Cause I needed this,” I stated as I used my left hand to pull out the trinket chest and curled my lips like an angry dog.

“You could’ve just left me for dead,” she told me and I smirked angrily.

“Like you did to me?” I asked in a pissed off tone. She was speechless and tried to think up a response. “You know, I only gave you CPR in hopes that I could kill you myself, and then I realized something,” I snarled at her.

“Oh yeah? What’s that?” she asked in an irritated tone.

“I realized that you’re so pathetic, you’re not worth my time,” I sneered then dropped her to the ground before starting to walk away.

“Don’t you walk away just yet!” she yelled at me. I took a glance back at her and curled my lips again and let out a vicious snarl.

“Don’t make me regret letting you live… Daring Don’t,” I taunted her name and walked off with the chest in my hands.

* * *

Hours later…

The walk back to the loading yard was long and tiresome, and along the way I realized something: Flim and Flam hadn’t told me how to contact them when I got the chest.

I reached the loading yard and sat around for another few hours. Now roughly midnight, judging by the moon in the sky, I was getting terribly tired.

I looked over to the new looking fuel pumps and curiosity enticed me. I paced over and took a closer look at them. The label read ‘F&F Industries.’

“Huh… so they do own the loading yard… or the fuel pumps anyway,” I mused before noticing a little note that was held to the pump by a magnet. I took the scrap of paper and read it out loud.

‘Dear Mr. Burdy,
We apologize for not giving you a location to meet us. If you don’t find this by tomorrow, we will visit the library to try and locate you. Though I’m not sure why I just wrote that, the next segment is important. Meet us in the desert fields just outside Ponyville. Our garage is not able to be missed.

Sincerely yours,
The F brothers.’

I crumpled up the paper and dropped it. On the other side of Ponyville was the Everfree so…

I looked to the opposite direction of Ponyville, towards the desert where Flim and Flam had driven my truck towards. “That must be where their garage is,” I muttered. I began walking into the desert and soon realized that this was a stupid idea.

* * *

Hours later…

It was early morning, so early that the sunrays were just coming over the horizon, yet the sun wasn’t quite there yet. I went to check the time then realized something else. “They also have… my watch… those mother fuckers…” I muttered in an exhausted voice. The sunrays gave the sky a morning orange look. Though it was spring, the desert plains were already hot and uncomfortable.

I climbed over another sand dune, but my jaw dropped as I spotted a garage in a large flat desert plain. The desert plains went on for miles. I looked back to see only an expanse of desert. It looked kind of abandoned and more like a movie prop. There was an old gas station out front of the garage with a rusty overhead canopy and the garage itself looked like a rusted out 70’s garage.

Though larger than most garages, the place looked terribly run down and ragged. Regardless of looks, I quickly ran down the hill and to the garage.

“Flim… Flam… I GOT IT!” I yelled. The two brothers came out dressed in mechanic clothing that were stained with black grease. Their faces were also stained with black smut which made me chuckle, seeing as how my first impression of the two was high-class business stallions, not mechanics.

I stumbled to the front of the garage and saw it was a bit bigger than I first thought. There were three garages. One had their train thing. Another had a small workplace with grinders, saws, welders, wrenches, basically all the stuff they needed.

In the last spot was…

My heart nearly stopped as I saw my truck... completely disassembled. “CADENCE!” I yelled and rushed in. Every part of her was taken apart, right down to every last lug nut or bolt. “What did you do to her?!” I roared and the brothers looked at me with confused looks.

“We were going to just fix the muffler, but then we realized several other things were broken, so we just figured that we’d completely restore it,” they told me.

“Completely restore it?! That’ll take…” I was about to say several months but they baffled me with their interruption.

“A week. Yes, we know,” they told me and I was stopped in my tracks.

“A… a week… as in one?” I asked and they nodded.

“As in about seven days, give or take,” they told me. I was about to ask how in the hell that was possible, then realized they had stripped it right down in less than twenty four hours. ‘How the hell did they do that?’ I thought, then something clicked. This place was so loony with magic and what-not that restoring a vehicle in seven days was probably possible, though I still had no idea how they knew what to do and how to do it.

“One question?” I asked and they nodded. I went to my toolbox that was lying aside and retrieved Applebloom. “Can you refurbish the stock on this rifle?” I asked as I showed them the battered gun.

Flam took the gun, nodded, then casually tossed it over his shoulder to Flim, who quickly rushed it to the repair shop. “Indeed. So do you have it?” Flam asked and I nodded then offered him the trinket chest.

He didn’t take the chest and looked at me blankly. “You’re not serious… are you?” he asked and I nodded. He chuckled briefly then noticed I was serious. “This isn’t what we wanted!” he said in a somewhat aggravated voice.

“But it was the chest in the cave in Ghastly Gorge and I had to fight a mare for it and I nearly died!” I yelled back. He slapped himself in the forehead.

“You said you knew where you were going,” Flam replied.

“Yeah, to Ghastly Gorge,” I stated and he slapped himself in the forehead again with a grunt of irritation.

“WHY IN EQUESTRIA WOULD YOU GO TO GHASTLY GORGE?!” Flam sputtered out and I scratched my head.

“Because the map told me to?” I replied in a questioning tone.

“No it didn’t! Ugh, give me the map!” he scowled and I pulled the map out from my hind pocket then handed it to him. He opened it up and completely unfolded it, then handed it back to me, pointing to the title which read ‘Go to the Equestrian Tire in Canterlot.’

“Ohhhhhh…” I trailed off as I started to feel really dumb. “But why on earth would it look like a pirate map. I mean it’s so old and… pirate-y looking,” I stated.

Flam let out a depressed sigh. “Well… in all honesty, my brother’s directions are rather terrible. This morning I accidentally spilt coffee on it and we tried to dry it off, and that’s why it looks so old and decrepit.” he sighed and then looked to my exhausted face. “You look tired. Take a nap on the bed, have a drink, then get on your way to Canterlot,” he told me. I nodded as I let a stupid and dorky smile spread across my face. 'I'm feeling really stupid right now.' I thought to myself.

* * *

Sunday, March 24th 2014, 12:39pm…

So it turned out that Flim and Flam needed me to go to Equestrian Tire in Canterlot to get a fuel pump for their train thing, all because they were shunned upon in Canterlot. Something about a scam with the royal garden and the flowers or something along those lines. Then there was something about having to duel with Celestia over who could harvest more bananas, but I was too tired to pay attention.

As it also turned out, the bed wasn’t a bed. It was a fold out couch that was rather old and dusty, and there was only one which made me wonder if the two slept together or if they took turns.

As for the drink, there wasn’t any water out here and they only had an old soda machine that was on the fritz. The cooling unit didn’t work and all the soda pops inside were piss warm. As of now, we had one extra item on the list, and they gave me a pouch full of bits to pay for everything, seeing as how they had forgot to in the beginning.

I hadn’t slept all that well, not because of the discrepancy of the old couch, but because of the heat. I was sweating horribly and the stench of my sweat made my nose twitch. I sat up and rubbed my eyes. Barely three hours of sleep, but it would have to do for now.

I grabbed the half drunken soda which was called ‘Sparkle Swirls’. It tasted a little like a mix of 7-Up and Mountain Dew and it had a blue colouration to it. The title of the soda was written in funny bubbly letters and I just rolled my eyes and tilted back the rest of the drink.

It had a tasteful aftertaste, though the warmth of the drink didn’t help my thirst. Their fridge was void of water and only had liquor of sorts in it. The fridge was also a little fritzy, but it did manage to cool down items. There were also some fruits in the fridge, all of which looked rather old. The bananas were a bit brown, the oranges looked too soft, and the apples looked mushy.

I walked out of the office, or bedroom, or whatever it was, and saw my truck. The chassis was already being put back together, though the two brothers were nowhere to be seen.

I walked over to my toolboxes and opened them before pulling out a case labeled ‘No-Name.’ For the longest time I had meant to name it, but nothing really took my attention. So, after several months, it just got the nickname ‘No-Name,’ so that was her name.

I pulled the Russian SVT-40 out of the case along with the magazine which was still capped at five rounds. “Oh, I’ll soon fix you,” I muttered as I placed the magazine in my hind pocket.

I went to the other toolbox and grabbed a few 7.62x54R cartridges and tossed them in my other pocket before making my way over to their repair shop. As I walked along with the Russian battle rifle dangling in my hands, I chuckled from the oddly coloured receiver.

For whatever reason, when the Russians had refurbished the rifles after the second world war, the heat treatment for the receivers had turned the receiver block a light shade of purple.

I made my way over to a work desk and put the magazine into a table vice and locked it into a gentle but firm hold. I grabbed a pair of pliers, a hammer, a pin punch, and a flat-head screwdriver.

I quickly disassembled the magazine then went to work on removing the plug and, after several minutes of mangling the rivet, the plug fell free from the hollow magazine. I reassembled the now plug-less magazine and loaded ten shells of 7.62x54R full metal jacket into the magazine.

“Man… I remember how weird it felt to load ten rounds into Applebloom, but this… this just feels unreal,” I muttered before gently locking the magazine into place. I chuckled as I remembered my brother trying to slam the magazine into the gun once. I told him that he played too many videogames and that, in real life, you had to be a bit more gentle with the insertion of a magazine.

A memory faded into my mind as I remembered buying the gun from Wolf’s Den back on my world, all those months ago… actually, now that I think about it, it was probably over a year ago.

I saw it just sitting idly by itself, no one paying even the slightest bit of attention to the, socially considered, ugly Russian gun. I asked the clerk how much and he asked ‘What, that big Russian gun?’ and I nodded. He told me ‘$350 and it’s yours with a sling, magazine, and oiling can.’ And within a heartbeat I bought it, not caring to do any thorough research into the gun first. I knew what it was, but I had no idea how the gun fared, but in the end I was quite happy with my No-Name.

I left the rifle without a round in the chamber, just for safety. Speaking of safety, the safety on the rifle was much like that of my SKS, just a little metal tab that swung behind the trigger to prohibit the trigger from being pulled back.

I flipped the safety on and began to leave, not really caring where the brothers were. I stopped just before I left and grabbed another soda pop for the journey. Lucky for me the tops to the bottled beverage was twist off, so I was good for now.

* * *

For a few hours I had treaded aimlessly through the desert before finally finding a set of train tracks and hitching a free ride in an empty freight wagon.

By evening the train reached the train yard outside Ponyville and I hitched onto a train that was supposedly headed for Canterlot. The train rides were boring, uncomfortable, and they seemed to drag on forever, but, after what felt like eternity, I finally arrived in the streets of Canterlot.

I hopped off the train and figured my first stop should be the museum, seeing as how Flim and Flam didn’t need the trinket chest. I began walking through the streets and quickly realized I had no idea where to find the museum. At first I had just thought there’d be a big sign or something.

I kept walking through the streets, but I soon noticed that nearly everypony was staring at me. ‘I really hope that they haven’t found out what guns are,’ I thought to myself, then figured they were just staring at me because I was different.

After another hour of looking, I gave up. I walked up to a mare who wasn’t looking directly at me. “Excuse me? Miss?” I asked. She turned, but as soon as she laid her eyes upon me, she gasped in horror.

“Oh my goddess! Look at you! You’re filthy!” she stated in a disgusted voice. I looked to myself and noticed that I was rather dusty and gritty from the desert. I just shrugged and rolled my eyes.

“Hey, where’s the museum?” I asked bluntly. She pointed to a building down the street and raised her left hoof to her head in a distressful way.

“I moved to Canterlot to escape such filth. I never thought it would’ve followed me,” she whined. I grabbed her left hoof and shook it.

“Thank yah ma’am. Yah don’t know how much yah just yelped me,” I said in a very southern accent. She let out a very loud whinny noise before fainting, gaining the attention of everypony nearby.

I quickly paced over to the museum and walked through the front doors. An attendant held his hoof up. “Sorry sir. The museum is just closing. It opens again at eight tomorrow morning,” he told me and I rolled my eyes then pulled out the trinket chest.

“I’m an adventurer. I brought this back for the museum,” I informed him. He gasped in an impressed tone and pointed up the hallway.

“Up the stairs, to the left, and last door on the right,” he instructed and I nodded. I started following his instructions but at the same time found myself intrigued by the museum exhibit titles. There were dinosaur exhibits, medieval exhibits, even primal pony exhibits. I quickly shook off my lack of focus then followed the attendant’s instructions and found myself at some executor’s office door and let myself in without knocking.

Inside was an older looking grey earth mare and… Daring. “I’m telling you, Rufus hired some hairless ape that destroyed the entire ship and the cavern, BUT PEG LEG’S GOLD WAS THERE!” she announced.

The older mare noticed my arrival and took her attention away from Daring. Daring followed her gaze and gasped. “YOU!” she scowled and I looked behind myself, then back to her and pointed to my chest.

“Me?” I asked innocently and she gritted her teeth before pointing her hoof at me.

“That’s the thing that destroyed Peg Leg’s history,” Daring scowled and I rolled my eyes.

“First off: I may be a ‘thing,’ but my name is Evan. Second off: it’s not nice to point. Thirdly: You were responsible for the destruction of that place. If you hadn’t trapped me in that cell and left me for dead, for absolutely no fucking reason I might add, then I wouldn’t have come after you in a bloodthirsty rage,” I replied calmly.

The older mare looked to Daring curiously, probably from my last statement. “You… trapped him in a cell and left him for dead?” she asked and Daring shook her head frantically.

“No way. He deserved it. He’s working for Rufus,” Daring stated.

“I was working for Flim and Flam,” I snapped back.

“They’re just the middle stallions,” Daring countered, but before I could counter back, the older mare snickered.

“Flim and Flam… middle stallions? Ha, now I’ve heard it all.” she laughed lightly, making a confused look cross Daring’s face. “Flim and Flam used to be big names, but they slowly fell into nothing more than a pair witty brothers whose names are only known by those that they tried to scam,” the mare stated before extending her hoof. “Mrs. Applenathy, and you said your name was…” she trailed off in a very enticed voice.

“Burdick, Evan Burdick. But you can call me Burdy if yah fancy,” I stated in a very businesslike voice before shaking her hoof. Daring shot me a cold glare which made me smirk, but my next move I knew would blow her top.

I pulled out the trinket chest and set it on the table. “This belongs in a museum. So I thought it would be a nice addition to this place,” I stated. Daring stood up in a rage, steam nearly blowing out her ears.

“YOU BASTARD! I said that belonged in a museum and you said it belonged in your boss’s hooves!” she screamed. I stifled a laugh and shrugged.

“Turns out I misread the map my bosses gave me. They actually wanted me to go to Equestrian Tire and pick up a fuel pump,” I stated. Daring’s jaw hung open in anger but Mrs. Applenathy simply nodded and pulled the chest towards herself.

“You… you dirty… you dirty filthy rat!” Daring hissed and I laughed before placing a hand on the chest, making Mrs. Applenathy look to me with a wondering look.

“Both Daring and I found this. But for the record, just say that Daring found it. I don’t need my name on some plaque beneath this when it’s on display,” I stated. Daring gasped and her jaw hung agape, completely shocked that, after all that, I gave her complete credit for its recovery.

Mrs. A. nodded and smiled. “Well indeed… let’s see what’s inside shall we,” she said and pulled out a small automatic lock pick. She inserted the little pin and pulled back on the overly large trigger with her hoof. There was a click and the chest opened up.

A wisp of blue smoke trailed up into the air then was caught in the wind and immediately dissipated. Mrs. A just looked blankly into the chest. “Oh my…” she trailed off and turned the chest around so we could see inside.

It was completely void of anything that would be considered history. “It’s empty,” Daring gasped and I shook my head then reached inside for the only thing actually inside the otherwise empty chest.

“No it’s not, look,” I stated as I pulled out what looked like pocket lint. “It’s lint. For all we know, it could’ve been Peg Leg’s pocket lint,” I stated jokingly. Both of the mares frowned and I chuckled sheepishly. “Bad joke, huh?” I asked, already knowing the answer.

Mrs. Applenathy shook her head in a sad way. “I’m sorry Daring. But I just can’t pay you if it doesn’t actually have anything in it. For all anypony would care, it’s just an empty chest we could’ve picked up at a garage sale,” she informed Daring who drooped her head in defeat.

“Actually… there is one more thing,” I stated and they both looked to me. I pulled out one of the three gold bullions I had and placed it on the table. Mrs. A’s eyes went wide as she carefully picked it up.

“This… this is ancient,” she muttered and I raised an eyebrow before she continued. “Well… that is to say, it’s not technically ancient, but it is old…” she trailed off and pulled out some weird monocle looking thing and placed it over her right eye. Through the magnifying monocle focal lens, her eye looked obscenely large.

“And it was signed by Peg Leg himself. Look, that’s his insignia,” Mrs. A. gasped, handing the gold and monocle to Daring. The younger mare inspected it and she too gasped.

They both looked to me and in a unison chorus stated: “This is an incredible discovery!” I rolled my eyes and pointed to Daring.

“She found it,” I stated, almost like a child blaming their sibling for something bad that was done. Mrs. A. quickly pulled out a pen and scribbled something on a cheque then handed it to Daring. Daring hoof-pumped the air and let out a cheer.

“Aww yeah!” she cheered then nodded to the older mare. “I’ll see you later. I’m sure I can dig up something else before the month is done,” she stated then headed out the door.

As the door closed behind me, I looked to the older mare and pulled out another gold bullion. Her eyes went even wider than before. “Same gig. Peggy’s gold,” I stated and she took the bullion from my hands with her hooves.

“Incredible… just incredible,” she stated and went to call Daring back in but I silenced her.

“This is going on my payroll, but still documented that she found it,” I told her. She nodded and scribbled me up a cheque. I took the check and looked at it, but the results nearly made me have a heart attack.

“Fi… Fif… Fifty G’s!” I gasped and she nodded like it wasn’t a big deal. “Christ! I thought maybe you’d give me five grand plus maybe compensation or something but holy shit! Fifty fucking grand!” I yelled and she placed her hoof to her mouth, motioning for me to tone it down.

“Well yes. The gold itself would be worth much more on the black market, adding in the fact that most people believe Peg Leg to be urban folklore. This is a truly remarkable find and deserves compensation. Now do take in mind, Daring did get paid more, but only because she was more experienced and has been looking for this treasure for the last few weeks… speaking of which, how long were you searching?” she asked and I chuckled while I scratched the back of my head.

“Just yesterday.” she blinked and it took a moment before she realized I was serious.

“Wow… you are a true professional!” she stated and I shook my head.
“Nah, I’m just lucky is all,” I stated before extending my hand for a goodbye shake.

I gave her one final nod before leaving. The attendant was still there and he gave me an appreciative nod as I was about to leave. I stopped and turned to him. “Hey bud?” I asked and he perked his head up in attention. “Where’s the Equestrian Tire?” I asked.

“Once you step outside, go left, two blocks down and you can’t miss it,” he informed me. I gave him an appreciative nod and left the premise.

I began walking down the night streets of Canterlot but, as I neared my destination, a hoof wrapped around my mouth and pulled me into an alleyway. In a shock of fear that somepony might be trying to mug me, I twisted my body and pulled the culprit’s body over my right shoulder and to the ground.

My left hand instinctively grabbed my buck knife from the ankle sheath and quickly brought it to my aggressor’s throat. I was shocked to find Daring lying beneath my grip. “Couldn’t leave well enough alone, could you?” I asked as I brought the knife down harder to her throat, now risking to slice it open.

“Okay, OKAY! I give!” she pleaded.

“Well maybe I don’t accept your surrender. Maybe I’m so sick of your bullshit, that I just want to bleed you out, be done with it. Never have to see your goddess forsaken eyes ever again!” I hissed.
Her eyes went wide with fear and my anger settled before I got up from on top of her. “You’re one lucky bitch, you know that right?” I snarled. She stood up cautiously and brushed herself off.

“What’s your deal anyway?” She inquired.

I let out a sigh as I sheathed my knife. “Like I said, my bosses needed something, I misinterpreted the map and everything else is history,” I stated.

“How’d you find the cave so easily? It took me weeks to find it,” she countered.

“Luck,” I replied back. She gave me a sour look. She opened her mouth to bicker at me and I gave her a blunt but serious look and she just sighed.

“I’m sorry,” she apologized as she sighed. She took a deep breath then continued. “I know what I did was dastardly and completely inexcusable, but I thought you were working for Rufus. His goons would’ve done that to me in a heartbeat if given the chance,” she stated.

I extended my hand and she looked to me then shook it. “I forgive you. And I’m sorry too… for nearly killing you, and threatening to slit your throat, and destroying the evidence of Peg Leg…” I trailed off with a smirk. “Guess I’m the one in the wrong here,” I laughed and she joined in with a brief chuckle.

“Thank you,” she thanked me and I raised an eyebrow.

“For what?” I asked and she shrugged.

“Oh, I don’t know,” she replied sarcastically. “For saving my life several times in less than an hour. For saving just a fraction of Peg Leg’s history, then giving me the credit… heck, nopony has ever done that for me,” she stated then slowly hopped up to her hindlegs and gave me a peck on the cheek.

She stood back down onto all fours. “Don’t tell anypony about this, or I’d have to kill yah,” she laughed with a wink. “Maybe sometime, if you need my help, I can pay you back,” she said. I nodded as she flew off.

Just before she finished flying off, I went to a nearby dumpster and pulled out a used pencil and a gritty piece of paper. I began writing a letter to Twilight.

Dear Princest Sparkle,
I learned friendships aren’t always what they seem to be. Sometimes a pony might mistake another pony for somepony that they're not, and then proceed to do things that they might not think through very well. In the end both ponies may be in the wrong for their actions, regardless of whether their intentions were good or not.

With immature regards,
Burdy

Author's Note

So Chad, that guy that I mentioned in the cereal chapter, well him and his mom got into an argument about something and she told him to go live with his dad, but his dad lives in a single room with one bed and a dog, so he didn't have room. So for next however long, I'm the temporary Guardian of this kid... and he says I'd be a pretty cool dad, if I had kids.
Just figured I'd tell you guys and gals a nit-bit of my life just because. Have a good one eh! (Yeah, I'm Canadian)

Chapter 11

‘Bad Company…’

Monday, April 1st, 2014…

So, as it turned out, Flim and Flam somehow managed to disassemble, fix, and then start re-assembling my truck, all in a week’s time. There were only a few things left that they needed to do apparently, but they wouldn’t let me look at her, something about wanting to surprise me.

When I had gotten back and revealed my cheque to the brothers, they stated that they could cash it for me, since I didn’t know how, though they took a fine cut of ten thousand bits each, leaving me with only thirty thousand. ‘Dinks,’ I thought silently to myself.

It also turns out there were a few different kinds of bits. The regular bit was worth one, and it was just a blank gold coin. Then there was the hundred bit, and it was a little bigger than a regular bit and had a picture of the night princess on it, Looney I think her name was, but I’m not sure if that’s right. Then there was the thousand bit coin, which had a picture of Celestia on it and was the largest of the three. So I had thirty of these Celestia coins which, in turn, made me sort of rich, in a matter of sense.

Left with a still hefty chunk of cash, I was going to go back to the library, but the brothers requested that I stay, for protection. I had reluctantly obliged, though now I was really starting to realize just how stupid I was…

I sat on a lawn chair just outside the automotive garage, looking out to the empty expanse of harsh desert. Heat waves could literally be seen as the temperature stayed at an extreme high.

I looked to the circular thermometer that was fogged. The thermometer read that it was 115 degrees Fahrenheit. Sweat nearly poured down my face, constantly stinging my eyes and making me rub them dry.

I was wearing what used to be a white t-shirt that was cut at the shoulders and made into a tank top. I also had a pair of blue jeans, and my Terra work boots. My soda pop was starting to go stale, but it was way too warm to even be considered comfortably drinkable.

Being as bored as I was, Flim had made me a radio to listen to my CD tracks, but the radio went on the fritz and it kept replaying the same song over and over again. Though the song was good for the first hour, forty eight hours later with the same song going on a loop got pretty bore-some. I had heard it so much that I nearly knew the lyrics by heart, and almost had the voice pattern down pat.

“Company, always on the run,
Destiny, is the rising sun,
Oh I was born, six-gun in my hand,
Behind a gun, I’ll make my final stand…”

I stopped singing along to the lyrics of ‘Bad Company, by Bad Company’ and started cleaning out my SVT-40. The rifle, despite being of Russian origin, was actually quite complex and needed the use of tools to be disassembled. As the song continued, and I continued cleaning my gun, I looked over to the new brass ammunition that had been made for the gun.

About four days ago, I took a shot at one of my empty glass bottles and nearly gave the F brothers heart attacks. They were so curious that they made me explain everything I knew about the gun. I had explained the properties of corrosive ammunition opposed to regular ammo, gas operation and all the other good things that came with owning a military surplus rifle.

They were so enticed that they were about to try to start constructing firearms, then I told them ‘No way in hell’ and threatened that I’d have to kill them if they did. They were shocked about my threat, then I explained that, back on my world, though guns were fun, they did a lot of bad when in the hands of bad people, and something told me that there were probably some pretty bad ponies out here, despite this world being so peaceful.

In the end, they offered to make non-corrosive ammunition for my rifle, with brass shell casings.
Somehow, in the course of two days, they managed to make not only 7.62x54R ammunition, but 12 gauge, 7.62x39mm, and a few other types that I requested. I kind of felt bad now due to my threat against them producing guns, but I wasn’t about to be the reason guns became a problem in Equestria.

I smiled as my insides felt all warm and mushy. Despite what Applejack might think of these two, they seemed alright to me.

My head throbbed from the heat and I took a sip of the distastefully warm beverage. As I set the bottle back down, I noticed a plume of dust in the distance. I put my rifle back together and slapped a fully loaded magazine into the gun, then let it rest on my lap.

What looked to be a weird first generation Volkswagen Beetle pulled up. If not for the cheap wooden tires, the roofless top, and the exposed engine block, the thing looked like an original.

I was even more stunned when a… cat thing, stepped out. It stood on two legs and was obviously bipedal. Its arms and hands were kind of like a human, though it had paws, thumbs, and a light coat of fur. It was dressed with a tattered white shirt that barely covered its large human-like breasts. A pair of old grey jeans covered its fury legs and a pair of rugged, old leather boots covered its feet. The creature itself looked to be light framed and only stood five feet tall. Most of its fur was orange, but its chest hair was white, along with the palms of its hands.

It walked over to me and I got a better look at its face. It had a feline face, whiskers and all. Its eyes were blue and genuine looking, “Fine day,” stated the feline thing in a feminine voice.

“Yes ma’am,” I stated.

“You a new owner or something?” she asked curiously and I shook my head.

“No ma’am, just having my vehicle repaired,” I replied casually. She nodded then leaned back to get a look inside the garage, searching for the owners.

“Don’t mind me, just need some fuel,” she stated then started walking towards the far garage where my truck was. I took a look at her as she walked away and noticed what looked like a blocky handgun holstered at the back of her hip. It had no real distinguishing features about it, other than it had an overly large barrel and a pistol grip.

I shook my head and went back to singing along with the song as my thoughts wandered. 'I must be having a mirage... I mean, guns don't exist in Equestria' I thought silently to myself. The song had looped again and was partly through the song.

“Chose a gun,
And threw away the sun,
Now these towns,
They all know our names…”

“PLEASE WE DON’T HAVE ANY MONEY!” screamed one of the brothers, catching my attention. I quickly leaned over and looked to see the cat thing holding up the two brothers with her pistol thingy, though it wasn’t quite a just a pistol
.
The top of the barrel split along the top and the hind of the barrel had folded forwards. Now the handgun was a crossbow pistol of sorts, I think. How it would work was beyond me, but I could see the looks on the brothers’ faces and it was obvious that what she was holding was a serious piece of hardware.

A presence suddenly landed beside me. “Hey Evan, what’s up?” asked a dopey yet friendly voice.

I quickly darted my look over to Derpy. “Derpy, sssh!” I motioned for her to be quiet and her eyes went wide with shock. I discreetly pointed over to the bandit and Derpy gasped, getting the bandit’s attention.

She swung the handgun bow thingy towards Derpy and myself. “Don’t move or I’ll plug yah!” the cat yelled. Both Derpy and I froze and she swung her bow pistol back to the brothers. “Give me all you got!” she yelled.

“Please, we have nothing of value,” the brothers pleaded. She leaned to the side and took a look inside then pointed her bow at something inside.

“Bullshit. Give me that gold!” she ordered as she pointed her pistol thingy at something. Flim immediately ran inside and retrieved my remaining gold bullion that I had kept as a memoir.

“Hey! That’s my gold!” I shouted. Her aim was shifted back to me.

“Shut up!” she yelled and I nodded as my hands slowly crept for the grips of my rifle. Derpy foolishly spoke up.

“That’s not very nice! I don’t like you talking to my friend like that!” Derpy argued back to the feline. My gut wrenched as the feline got really crossed.

“Stupid bitch! I’ll show you!” she scowled then took aim on Derpy.

“DERPY! GET DOWN!” I yelled as I lept up and jumped in front of Derpy. Six excruciating pains shot through my body. The first struck my left shoulder, then a second was placed nearly right beside it. A third slammed into the lower left part of my abdomen then another on the right side. A fifth pain seared on the right side of my chest as something shot into my pectoral muscle. The last shot clipped the top part of my shoulder, but didn’t dig in like the others.

I fell back, seething in pain as my leg stiffened. “Now nopony fucking move!” the cat roared. She snatched the gold out of Flim’s hoof before racing over to her buggy car thing. As she slammed the door, I painfully reached towards my lawn chair and snatched my SVT-40.

I leaned my body to the side and fired four finely placed shots at the exposed engine of the vehicle. The combustion engine backfired briefly before a plume of smoke spat out the front of the vehicle.

“You fuck! You’re so dead!” roared the cat thing as it jumped out and raced around the front of the vehicle, already drawing out its pistol bow. I held the SVT-40 with one arm, pulling the butt of the stock tightly again my shoulder. My aim was sloppy, but the first shot hit her in her left leg, making her screech in pain.

My second shot echoed through the air and hit her square in her right shoulder. The different momentum forces tilted her balance and took her off her feet, spinning her to the ground with a thump.

I groaned as Flim and Flam rushed over. Derpy slid to my side and stuck her left hoof under my body then cradled me as she examined my wounds with her right hoof. “Oh no! Evan, you’re not hurt bad, are you?!” she pleaded frantically.

I groaned as I shook my head. “No…” I grunted then rested my left hand on my chest and felt the protrusion of a crossbow bolt, though it was rather small. “I’m hurt pretty bad,” I muttered, knowing full well that these shots could have severed some major arteries.

“Oh please… oh please Celestia no. I don’t want you to be hurt really bad!” Derpy wept. I lifted my left hand to her face and wiped her tears away.

“Derpy…” I grunted and she looked down to me, though some of her tears dribbled down into my eyes and made me clench my eyes shut before I could open them again. “I’ll live,” I told her.

“Tail twist swear?” she asked and I shook my head.

“Not right now…” I muttered before trying to stand.
“Wait! Let me help!” Flim ordered, rushing to my side then helping me up. I staggered to my feet with an ‘Oof…’ then grimaced in pain. Flam rushed over with a medical pack. “This may hurt a little…” Flim informed me as he readied himself to pull out the first crossbow bolt, but I shook my hand.

“Let me,” I muttered, then gripped the first bolt protrusion at my left shoulder. I clenched my eyes and yanked it out. A small spurt of blood came out, but nothing serious. I started painfully yanking bolt after bolt. Luckily they were small, only about two inches in length and didn’t have barbed heads.

After the final bolt was extracted, Flim spoke. “You’ll need to take off your shirt,” he ordered me. I grimaced as I painfully tried to take off my shirt. With the pain still searing throughout my body, I could barely move.

Derpy noticed my pain and began helping me remove my shirt. Blood oozed down my chest and Flim quickly began to tend to my wounds with some sort of cream. “This is medical lotion. It isn’t as potent as the potions, but it will do the job for these wounds,” he informed me.

"I don't want a tetanus shot." I muttered, not wanting to go through the whole ordeal of a sex craved mind. Flam chuckled, probably knowing why I didn't want one. “Didn’t know you were a doctor,” I joked.

“Yes, well… I did take a few medical courses back in my youth while I tried to find my special talent, but I digress,” he informed me as he continued to apply compression pads to my wounds along with medical gauze and wrap.

After a short time, Flim had me looking like some battered war veteran. I winced as I tried to smile. “Thanks…” I started, but was cut off by a pained groan nearby. We all looked over to see the cat thing trying to get up.

Flim rushed over and booted her in the gut. “That’ll teach you to mess with us!” Flim yelled, almost like he had done all the work. Derpy stood on her hind legs, using her wings to keep herself balanced while she had her left foreleg wrapped around my back to help support my weight.

“You’ll be okay… right?” Derpy asked in a frightened voice. I nodded with a smile.

“It’ll take more than a bow…” I trailed off, wondering what exactly she had shot me with thenlooked to Flam, who was watching Flim lay a rather feeble beating to the cat. “What was that thing she shot me with?” I asked and Flam scowled.

“A hoof bow. Blasted things are illegal in Equestria due to their deadly nature! I can’t believe she managed to find one!” Flam scowled.

“Who’s ‘she’?” I asked as Flim continued to ruthlessly kick the cat, though his kicks looked pretty light and I bet they wouldn’t be able to break anything stronger than drywall.

“Felix!” Flam scowled, revealing the cat’s name to be Felix. “She’s a desert bandit… and she keeps robbing us for everything we have! It’s not fair! Well, finally she’s gotten hers!” Flam cheered and Flim rubbed the sweat off his forehead as he took an exhausted breath, though the beating he gave Felix looked as if it hadn’t really hurt her.

“What is she?” I asked, wondering just exactly what ‘she’ was.

“A Nympho experiment,” Flam stated and I snickered painfully. “What’s so funny?” he asked and I managed a reply.

“Nympho? Seriously?” I asked and he nodded.

“Yes… they tried to create an army of bipedal warriors to conquer Equestria, but in the end the test subjects had kept their memories and escaped the Nympho factory. Some believe it to be nothing more than a myth, but ‘SHE’ is proof that it existed,” Flam informed me.

The tunes to ‘Bad Company’ were still playing and I quickly grabbed the electrical cord and unplugged it from the extension cord, silencing the music. I walked over to Felix and looked down on her as she tried to stand up.

I pressed my boot down hard on her wounded leg. Blood spurted out of the bullet hole that was placed gruesomely in her hamstring area. She cried out in agonizing pain. “AHHHHHH, PLEASE!” she cried.

“Why?” I asked sadistically as I readied my rifle.

“Please… just don’t!” Felix screamed as she withered in pain. I bit my lower lip as I started contemplating blowing her head off. Just a moment ago, when she tried to shoot Derpy down, I would’ve done it in less than a heartbeat, but now it was more difficult to stomach the idea.

I looked back to Derpy, who had her hooves covering her mouth with a petrified look on her face, obviously baffled by my dark behaviour. Flam rested a hoof on my left shoulder.

“Do it,” he told me. I looked to him then back to Derpy, then to Felix who lay writhing beneath my boot. My finger rested against the trigger of my SVT-40. Everything seemed to slow as I considered my two choices.

After a long pause I took a breath then stepped back. Felix immediately grasped her wounded leg with a gasp of pain, still crying profusely. Flim and Flam’s jaws both slung open in shock. I leveled my gun on Felix. “Get up,” I told her and she painfully obliged. “Why did you try to rob them?” I asked and she spat at the ground in front of my feet.

“Because those two scumbags scammed my family out of our farm. My mom quickly perished without the dairy milk and bandits killed my brother. I had nothing, and I wanted to get my revenge on these two!” she scowled. My gut wrenched as my moral choices came back and bit me in the ass.

I had already chosen sides with the F brothers and I wasn’t going to sell myself out and leave Flim and Flam in the dust, not after what I had done for them, and they for me. “Get out of here, and don’t come back… if you do, I won’t think twice about plugging you,” I threatened.

She nodded and limped over to the driver side of her buggy and got in. Amazingly the vehicle started and she began to drive it away. The engine rattled violently, every moment threatening to simply shut down and stop, but none the less, it still puttered away, albeit rather slowly.

Flam began to scream and scowl. “WHY’D YOU LET HER LIVE!” he yelled and I shrugged as I brought Derpy close to me and held her tightly to my right side. She had a bright smile spread across her face, obviously happy that I made that choice rather than the alternative.

I shrugged then looked back to the F brothers. “Morality. I’d rather choose the lighter side of things than the darker. Makes me feel better at the end of the day,” I replied. Flim and Flam rolled their eyes from my very pristine moral choices.

“Whatever… Come with us, Cadence is done,” Flim muttered scornfully. I went over to the flimsy radio and retrieved my CD, then looked at the piece of shit radio and hoped that they had done a better job with my truck than what they had done with the radio.

I grabbed my gold bullion, slung my rifle around my back, and began to walk after them. Though I was still sore and I wasn’t healing as fast as what healing potions could do, I could tell that my wounds were healing nicely.

We entered the garage and Flim pointed to a heap of rusty scrap metal. “Well… we tried our best but…” he trailed off and chuckled. My eyes went wide as I looked in disbelief at the pile of metal.

I fell to my knees with a gasp. “Ca… Caden… CADENCE!” I cried out as I scurried across the floor on my hands and knees. “Oh my… oh my god… Cadence… WHAT THE FUCK!” I yelled. “She… I…” I stammered and both Flim and Flam snickered.

I looked back to them as fury poured through my veins. “What’s so funny?!” I yelled and they both burst into laughter.

“April fools!” they both laughed and I was caught off guard for a moment before I thought to myself and checked my watch.

“Ugh… not only is it Monday…” I muttered silently before standing. The two brothers stifled their snickering, then took a deep breath and got serious.

“Your truck is around back. Sorry for the scare, but it was too good to pass up,” Flim chuckled. I nodded, then we all proceeded around back of the garage.

As I rounded the back corner of the garage, I was taken aback by the sight that bestowed me. “Kaaaaa…” was all I managed as I looked to my beautiful truck.

“We touched up the paint and removed those goddess awful rust spots. Your transmission also needed a tune up because it was kind of weak… oh and your…” Flam continued on jabbering for several minutes, but I couldn’t help but to stare in awe at my truck. She was magnificent.

I quickly scrambled over, got onto my knees, then hugged the front left tire. “Oh Cadence… oh baby… oh I love you so much,” I started ogling her like a baby.

After several minutes of hugging the tire and side panel of my truck, I looked back to Flim and Flam. “Thank you guys… this is awesome,” I thanked them and they just shrugged.

“You helped us in return, so consider it like services rendered,” they both stated simultaneously. I nodded to them and Flim raised a hoof as if to say something, then scampered back towards the garage.

“What’s he doing?” I asked and Flam shrugged with a ‘I dunno’ look on his face. Flim returned moments later with my SKS, though now her stock was refurbished. He tossed it over to me and the glossy coating that was on the wooden stock seemed to gleam.

“Wow!” I gasped as the rifle seemed to stick to my hands. It wasn’t an oily kind of stickiness, but it felt more like a magnetic kind of stick. It was incredible. I nodded before looking to the brothers. “Thanks you guys. You’re the best,” I told them with a genuine smile and they both simply shrugged with effortless smiles on their faces.

“She’s fueled up and ready to go… oh, and we left a CB radio so that we can contact you without waiting too long for a response,” they informed me before turning and walking back to the garage. I took a peek through the passenger side window to see a CB radio mounted just beside the glove box.

I turned to Derpy and smiled. “They gave me a CB radio,” I said with a smile and she cocked her head to one side in curiosity. I shrugged.

“Never mind, wanna ride back to Ponyville?” I asked, and she thought to herself for a minute before nodding.

I opened the door and offered to help her in. She graciously took my hand but, as soon as her hoof touched my hand, I felt a sharp jolt of electricity shoot through me. “Gah! Hey, what gives?” I gasped as I pulled my hand away.

“Oops! My bad… I forgot,” she apologized as she turned her hoof over to reveal an electric hoof shake shocker. “I was going to prank ponies with this today. Sorry about that,” she stated, then removed it so I could help her into the truck, though I suppose she could’ve just as easily hopped in.

I closed the door behind her and made my way to the driver side. Once I got in, I set my thirty Celestia bits into my center console box and Derpy’s eyes went wide. “Wow! That’s a lot of money!” Derpy gasped.

“Nah… here, have one, they’re kind of overrated,” I stated before tossing her one of the coins, making her crisscrossed eyes go wide.

“R… really?” she asked hesitantly and I shrugged.

“Yeah… why not?” I asked casually, as if it wasn’t a big deal. She just looked at me blankly for a moment before replying.

“Because this is a lot of money,” she replied and I just brushed aside her hesitancy.

“Derpy, money is just a thing… an object of society if you will. Money is only what ponies make it to be. Give one of these coins to someone who lives off the land and doesn’t go grocery shopping, and it’s completely useless to them. On the other hand, err, hoof, you’re one of my best friends and friendship is ma...” I trailed off as I realized what I was about to say, then downed my pride and said it. “Friendship is…” I almost swallowed my pride as I thought of a better word to say. “Friendship is priceless. So yes, you can have it, regardless of how much it is worth,” I stated.

“Wow! Thanks,” she thanked me and I shrugged before pulling down the sun visor and catching the keys without really paying attention to my action, it was an almost natural action for me. I swiped the naughty key then started Cadence.

She purred to life, almost as if she was brand new. “Wow… Flim and Flam really out did themselves.” I muttered, then wondered just how they knew what to do. After a moment of pondering the question, I shrugged it off and started my way back to Ponyville, thrashing though the desert with the newly refurbished Cadence.

* * *

Ponyville Library, third person…

Twilight sat with her five best friends in all of Equestria, Spike being absent since he had left to go play with the Cutie Mark Crusaders and search for their special talents in life.

“Why not just be honest with him?” Applejack offered and Twilight sighed.

“I’ve tried,” the princess replied and Applejack scratched the back of her head.

“And…” Applejack inquired and Twilight sighed sadly.

“Well… I was about to tell him how I really felt and then…” Twilight trailed off and didn’t immediately finish.

Pinkie Pie gasped. “And? And?... AND THEN WHAT?!” the frizzy, pink mare squealed. The group all gave her curious looks, Pinkie Pie simply had a way of being… well, Pinkie Pie.

“Well… I got scared that he wouldn’t accept it and reject me,” Twilight replied sheepishly. Rainbow Dash set her hoof on Twilight’s shoulder with a genuine smile.

“Twilight, you’ve gotta get your head outta your flank and tell that guy, that way it won’t be weighing down on you. Even if he does say no and isn’t interested, you’ll still be good friends,” Dash told her good friend.

“And if he doesn’t want to be friends after?” Twilight asked fearfully, but this time it was Rarity's turn to answer.

“Then he isn’t worth your friendship darling,” Rarity replied in a very self-righteous tone.

“But even if I do manage to muster up the courage to ask… he’s so… thick headed,” Twilight rekindled another problem. Applejack chuckled.

“Sugarcube, that boy ain’t all there, but he does mean well. Yah’ll just have tah be extremely blunt with him, an’ I mean ‘EXTREMELY BLUNT,'” Applejack stated.

“Okay, just… nopony tell him. It needs to be me who tells him. I’m not sure how he’d react if everypony tried telling him how I felt,” Twilight told the others. They all nodded in agreement before turning to Fluttershy, who had stayed quiet for the duration of the conversation.

“Well Fluttershy… what do you think?” they all asked in unison and Fluttershy blushed a deep shade of red.

“Oh… Me? Oh, I don’t know what to think…” she trailed off and didn’t continue her sentence.

“Well, say something to try and boost Twi’s confidence. You’re the shyest of all of us, so if you show courage, then Twilight will have to as well,” Rainbow Dash blurted out. Fluttershy felt as if she was cornered.

“Just tell him that you love him and everything will be fine,” Fluttershy blurted out quickly. Rainbow Dash put her right hoof forwards and looked to the others.

“Alright girls, whatta yah say we get Twilight the stal… the man of her dreams?” Dash asked and they all put their hooves in. Just as their hooves touches, everypony but Dash got a jolt of electricity, resulting in a snickering from the cyan pegasus.

"DASH!" They all blurted out, except Fluttershy who was too dazed by the feeble bolt of electricity. Dash simply continued to snicker.

* * *

Evan’s perspective…

I pitchforked a small pile of straw and began to walk towards the south stalls. As I made my way through the walkway, a cow stuck its head out and blocked the entire pathway.

“Autumn, not now,” I told her, but still she persisted. I tried to push past her without being too brash, but she hooked her head around my hip. “Autumn, I gotta finish bedding up the south side,” I told her, but she pulled her head to the side with force and tried to back me up.

I let out a sigh and tossed the straw under Dicey, the cow on the opposite side of the walkway. Autumn scratched her head up and down my side as I set the pitchfork aside. “Yes Autumn, I love you too,” I told her as I knelt down.
She pushed her face up beside mine and rubbed her wet nose attentively against my cheek. I rubbed back, although not as attentively as she was doing. She pulled her head away and licked my left cheek.

“Ah, Autumn, no!” I gasped as she licked me a second time. Her tongue was very rough and felt as if it was pulling my skin off. “Agh! Autumn, your tongue is like sandpaper!” I told her as I pulled my head away.

She looked to me with saddened eyes. “I gotta work,” I told her, but still her eyes remained sad. I flopped my hands over my face as I let out a deep exhale. “Fine,” I relented as I dropped down to my ass and nestled close to her.

She tilted her head to one side and began to lick my hair, grooming me in a sort of sense. Every so often she’d let out a huff and I’d just chuckle. “Yes, well, you know, ‘Mom' that’s what happens when I shower,” I told her and she continued to lick my hair, which used to be somewhat clean.

My hair soon became slick with bits of chewed nutrient grains and slobber. Autumn let out another huff. “Well you see mom, when I get home, I’m kind of dirty, so I take a shower to get clean. It just so happens that the water washes away your ‘cleaning,'” I told her, putting a somewhat sarcastic tone one 'Cleaning'.

She pulled her head back and scrunched her nose. I rolled my eyes before giving her cheek an attentive scratch. “Yeah, I love you too,” I told her. She pushed her nose against my cheek, then gave me a rough cow kiss, which felt like her tongue literally tore my facial skin off.

“Ow…” was all I muttered before rubbing my sore skin to make sure that it was still intact. Autumn scrunched her nose back again and let out a low pitched moo. I leaned forwards and gave her a loud smooch to her right cheek.

“Yes mom, I love you,” I stated before standing up to get back to work. Right before I grabbed my pitchfork, I ran my right hand through my hair. My mop of hair was littered with slobber and felt more like a slick of oil. “This must be what Italians feel like, Ech…”

* * *

Present time…

I shot straight up with a gasp as I awoke from another one of my dream memories as a crack of thunder boomed. I was breathing heavily and sweating profusely, despite being in a cut-off shirt.

When I had arrived in Ponyville after a week in the blazing hot desert, I felt a bit chilly in the cool spring weather. I had stopped in an open field and left my windshield in direct sunlight so that my body could absorb warm sun rays.

Derpy stated that she had needed to do her mail run, so she had flown off before I had passed out. I lifted my right wrist and checked the time. ‘Twelve o’clock…’ I thought to myself. Not only was it Monday, it was ‘still’ Monday, as in, I hadn’t finished this Monday.

I gave myself a moment to get my bearings before starting my truck and making my way back to the library. I thought to myself about how long it had been since I saw Twilight and Spike.

I had kind of missed those two during the week that I was absent and it would be nice to see them again…

A smile crossed my face as I continued on towards the library. I pulled out the CD that I had heard all week and, although the song was severely over played for me, I put on the tunes to ‘Bad Company’ and began singing along.

The final stretch to the library didn’t take all that long and I was kind of happy to be back. A small smile crept across my face as I pulled the truck up to the front of the library, rather than the car shelter.

As I killed the engine, I spotted the door opening, but didn’t really take notice. Leaving my SVT-40 in the back seat, I stepped out and rolled my shoulders, then took a long stretch.

A young puppy’s barking filled the air and a brighter smile crossed my face as I knelt down. “Lassie!” I announced in a bubbly voice as my puppy raced to my feet. I cradled her in my hands and brought her body up to my face so I could nestle my nose into her soft fur.

“Ooooh! Who’s a good little puppy?” I squeaked and the English Collie simply squealed out a thrilled vocal note that made me chuckle. She started to squirm as she realized just how high she was off the ground.

“Okay, okay, chill,” I laughed, gently setting her down so that she wouldn’t hurt herself. Lassie continued to prance around my feet, pawing at my boot laces before chewing them. “I’ll have to get you a chew rope or something, huh?” I laughed, but my laugh was chimed in by another, more illustrious laugh.

I leaned to the side so that I could see past my open truck door, only to see Twilight…

My jaw dropped as she trotted forwards but… she trotted with such… class. Her mane was straightened and groomed, I didn’t even know her mane was that long. It gleamed in the sunlight and sent off an aura that was breathtaking.

“She missed you,” Twilight stated and her voice was like beautiful music as she spoke. I was lost in the void of senselessness. Then a tugging at my boot laces brought my mind back to the present.

I scooped up Lassie and cradled her in my arms like a baby, scratching her tummy while I thought up a reply, still looking only at Twilight. “Yeah uhh… you look nice,” I stated in a rather casual tone. Her body continued to sparkle as the world in the background seemed to fade.

She lept up to her hindlegs and leaned against the front quarter panel of my truck. She raised a curious and rather sly eyebrow. “Just nice?” she asked and I gulped.

“Well… I mean… yeah,” I managed to sputter out. Something just wasn’t right. Lassie started to squirm again and I set her down, but I still couldn’t pin it, something was really off.

“So… I’m just nice? Not beautiful or pretty or…” Twilight trailed off and I realized she was wanting me to compliment the effort she had put in to look this way.

“Oh! I meant yeah as in: You look stunning,” I stated with a nervous laugh. Suddenly her foreleg slid off my truck by accident and she fell forwards with a shocked scream. I lunged forwards and caught her in my arms.

Her mane flowed over the sides of my arms as she just lay still, looking up into my eyes with her sparkling purple eyes. She opened her mouth to say something, but then something else caught my attention.

Damp speckles of… rain, were hitting the back of my neck. I peered up only to realize that every spot around us was dark, gloomy, and spitting rain. On the other hand, there was a beam of warm light surrounding us, and just us. “What the fu…” I looked up to see a hole in the clouds, with Rainbow Dash looking down on us.

“The fuck is this?” I muttered and Twilight let out a shocked 'GAH!' as she fell out of my arms and hit the ground with a THUD!

“Dash! What’s going on? Why isn’t it raining right here?” I asked cluelessly, pointing directly at my feet. She quickly looked both ways.

“Who me?” she asked and I rolled my eyes, nodding.

“Well yeah? Who else around here is named Dash?” I inquired and she quickly scratched her chin in thought.

“Well, I was just finishing making up this cloud and uh… misplaced the final piece and…” she trailed off and looked to the side. “OH! THERE IT IS!” she announced in what sounded like a fake surprised voice. She pulled out a piece of dark grey cloud and plugged the hole. As the sunlight peering through the once gaping hole immediately ceased, Twilight stopped sparkling and rain suddenly poured down. Lassie began to splash around in puddles as I closed the door to my truck and offered Twilight my hand.

“Huh?” she mumbled and I rolled my eyes.

“It’s gonna get muddy down there in a second… well, unless you wanna play in the mud?” I told her. Just as she took my hand, my stomach grumbled furiously. “Oh shit… I’m hungry,” I muttered, quickly realizing that I hadn’t eaten all day and for the last week I had survived on nothing but granola bars and Twinkies.

“Oh… uhm. I don’t think we have anything cooked right now…” Twilight trailed off and, as the rain continued to pour, her hair naturally dampened and started dripping.
“Wow Twilight…” I muttered and she perked up her ears. “You look beautiful,” I stated and her face crept into a bright smile.

“Really? You really mean that?” she asked and I nodded, but then my stomach interrupted me again.

“Oh damn! I gotta get something to eat…” I trailed off as I thought about my options. I could ‘save’ money and buy from the grocery store then cook it, but that would take a long time. Or I could…

“Are there any swanky restaurants in town?” I asked and Twilight tilted her head to one side in curiosity.

“Swanky?” she asked and I nodded.

“Yeah, you know, like… old style, kinda classy?” I asked and she shrugged.

“I don’t really know but…” she was cut off by a voice that came from the clouds.

“How bout Franchini’s? That place is ‘swanky,'” yelled Rainbow Dash as she zipped down and stood at perfect attention.

Twilight shook her head. “Dash, Franchini’s is kind of expensive and high class,” Twilight replied, but my stomach grumbled again and the decision was immediately made.

“To Franchini’s!” I announced and Dash’s ears perked up.

“Woah, woah, woah woah... WOAH! If you’re going to Franchini’s then you’ve totally gotta bring me,” Dash stated. Twilight was about to reply, probably to say it would cost too much, but I cut her off.

“Yeah, sure, whatever, just let me change. I’m soaked,” I stated.

* * *

An hour later…

So this place: Franchini’s, turned out to be on the edge of town, but man… it wasn’t just expensive, it was classy. It had a 50’s kind of vibe to it… or maybe 60’s, not sure what the difference was. There were big windows on the walls of the restaurant so that the customers could look out while they ate.

On the roof was a big, glowing neon sign that read ‘Franchini’s’. I was kind of dressed up, wearing my brown trench coat with light brown trousers and a white V-neck t-shirt. My black watch was hidden under the sleeve of my coat and my silver Christian cross hung freely around my neck.

Twilight had a sparkly purple dress that was kind of basic but nice at the same time. Dash… she had a ridiculous dress on that was littered with sparkly lightning bolts and clouds.

Lassie stayed cuddled in the inner hidden chest pocket of my trench coat. Twilight had told me again and again that dogs weren’t allowed and that we’d get in trouble if we brought her, but… I think Lassie wanted to go to Franchini's.

As we entered, I looked at the absolutely stunning furnishing of the restaurant. The chairs were all light brown stain finish with red cushions. The wall paint matched the cushions of the chairs.

The tables were of matching luxury and had white table cloth coverings. Everything looked to be expensive and luxurious. The walls looked like they had trimmed edges and were smooth to the touch. The overhead lights weren’t dim, but weren’t bright either, and had roof lamp coverings on them.

“Wow…” was all I managed as the three of us, four if you count Lassie, stepped up to the recipient, who was a black earth stallion in a white tuxedo.
“Welcome to Franchini’s, how may we serve you?” asked the very ritzy looking stallion, with a French accent.

“I’d like some salad with a side order a fries…” I began but Twilight slapped me upside the head. “Ow, hey!” I scowled and she rolled her eyes.

“Table for three, please,” Twilight stated in a polite and very courteous voice. The stallion nodded and waved his hoof to our left.

“Just this way, we have a table with a beautiful outlook of the pasture fields,” he stated, then led us to a table which, true to his words, had an outlook of the pasture fields. The three of us sat down, Twilight and Dash were across from me, and it would’ve seemed weird for me if I didn’t have Lassie with me. I mean, going out on for dinner at a fancy place with a mare and my mom was weird because I didn't have a dude friend... 'I need to make some dude friends.' I thought as I realized that none of my friends were stallions.

I reached into my coat and scratched behind her ears. She let out squeaks of enjoyment and Twilight rolled her eyes. “She’s gonna get us kicked out!” Twilight whispered and I rolled my eyes as I continued scratching Lassie’s head.

A female waitress stepped up and offered us three menus. I nodded her my thanks and quickly browsed through it, but one certain item caught my immediate attention. “You guys got fish!? I thought it was like… taboo to eat meat!” I stated and Twilight just leaned her head to one side and buried her face into her right hoof as Dash snickered.

“Yeah,” Dash began, “Way back, and I mean WAY BACK, when Equestria was first being formed, the pegasus leaders met with the gryphon leaders to discuss peace treaties. In celebration of their new found peace, they had a dinner together and the gryphons had brought fish, but hadn’t told the pegasi what it was. After they had eaten, the pegasus leaders were so thrilled about the taste of the mystery food that they had to know what it was. At first they were distraught about eating meat, but as they realized that it didn’t really have any negative effects, they quickly announced it as a delicacy,” Dash told me the story and I nodded.

A slab of salmon or bass sounded pretty good right now… hell, I’d even go to the trouble of picking out all the Y-bones in a slab of Pike if it meant I could eat meat.

I nodded and looked to the waitress. “Can I have… oh man… can I have like two or three orders of fish… please?” I asked and she gave me a quizzical look.

“Two or Three?” she asked.

“Three, make it three. Oh, and I gotta have some garlic bread rolls, two orders of garlic bread rolls… oh, and some lasagna… and some fries… and some onion rings… oh, and some spaghetti… and some soda pop…yeah… yeah, that’ll do,” I stated as my stomach continued to groan in anger.

“Is that all?” the waitress asked and I shook my head.

“Nah, that’s just for me,” I stated and she scrunched her nose in obvious disgust. Twilight ordered a salad and a hay sandwich while Dash on the other hand went all out like me, ordering fish, salad and sandwiches, all the while Twilight just shook her head in obvious irritation of our repulsive eating habits.

She finished taking our order and scribbled something down. “That’ll be twelve hundred bits,” she stated and I nearly gasped. That was ‘A LOT’ of money. I reached in the lower hidden pocket of my trench coat and pulled out two Luna bits and one Celestia bit, then handed them over to the waitress and she looked at me blankly.

“Did I not do my calculations right?” I asked as I leaned forwards to check if I had given her the right amount of cash. Twilight nudged me from across the table and whispered over to me.

“You’re supposed to give her a tip!” she informed me. I nodded with a smile as if I had just solved the answer to the universe.

“Ohhhhhh! Okay,” I stated then pulled out another Celestia bit and flipped it to the waitress. She gasped and nearly had a heart attack, judging by the look on her face. Twilight and Dash also had similar looks on their faces.

“What?” I asked cluelessly and Twilight groaned as she facehoofed. The waitress walked away with an infinite smile that spread from cheek to cheek. A faint whine chirped from the inside of my coat and I reached in to scratch Lassie’s ears. “Soon darling, soon,” I whispered.

After only five minutes, my stomach began to retort its anger more frequently than not. “Man… how long till we get some food?” I mumbled and Twilight just shook her head as Dash nodded in agreement.

“I know right? I’m gonna starve to death before my food gets here,” Dash chimed in. The waitress returned with our drinks and set them down. I nodded as she left again and took a sip of my soda.

A faint burp slipped from my lips. “Excuse me,” I pardoned myself and Dash raised an eyebrow.

“For what?” the rainbow maned pegasus asked. I was about to reply, but she interrupted me. “That… was not… a burp,” she stated in a rather scientific voice.

“Oh goddess, Dash, not here!” Twilight pleaded rather quietly so that nopony else could hear our conversation. Dash let out a rather mediocre burp that turned the heads of several other customers in the restaurant.

“That, was a burp,” Dash stated as she brushed her right hoof against the broad side of her chest. I let out a slightly louder, more manly burp, and nodded.

“That… was a burp,” I countered and Dash let out a longer burp that seemed to echo in the restaurant. “Oh… oh, you think that’s good?” I asked and she nodded slyly. I set my elbow, my fist on the underside of my chin, put on a poker face and let out a very manly burp. Dash just snickered as Twilight let out a groan of embarrassment.

Dash let out a lengthy burp then hoof pumped. “Aww yeah, can’t beat that!” she cheered and I sucked in a deep breath of air and swallowed it. I gulped, then echoed my loud burp. At first it was loud and distinctive, but it soon faded down into a very crispy burp and the echo managed to bounce off the walls of the restaurant.

Dash sucked back and tried to burp, but it only came out as a tiny little baby burp. I raised my arms into the air and flexed, my chest spread wide. “Yes!” I claimed my victory, but was interrupted by a tap on my shoulder.

I looked behind me to see the recipient with a rather distasteful look on his face. “Are you ready to check out sir?” he asked in a casual tone. I raised my eyebrow.

“What? No, we haven’t even gotten our food yet.”

* * *

Moments later…

“And I say twelve hundred bits is a friggin rip off!” I shouted then snickered as they slammed the door behind us.

Twilight flopped down to her haunches and began to pout. Dash simply burst into laughter. “Okay… now that… was THE BEST possible dinner EVER!” Dash squealed in laughter as Twilight continued to pout.

I gave her a gentle nudge. “Aww come on mom, it wasn’t THAT bad,” I stated, but she sniffled and looked up to me with teary eyes.

“Evan, why did you have to act like that. You’re usually such a gentlecolt,” she moped and I rolled my eyes.

“Yeah, but you have to have a little bit of fun every now and then, right?” I asked, but she continued to weep.

“Fine, have a ‘little’ fun… one burp was enough, but you didn’t have to get us kicked out,” she sniffled. ‘God, I don’t know what the big deal is? So we got kicked out, at least we still had our food. And at least it isn’t raining anymore,’ I thought to myself as I looked to the cloudy skies.

Dash took her baggy of food and gave me a punch to the side. “Well, I gotta fly. Thanks for the food dude,” Dash stated then zipped off. I pulled Twilight to her hooves and led her over to the tailgate of my truck.

“Come on Twi, we’ll have dinner together, like a family.” I stated as I pulled the tailgate down. I flopped my rear down as Twilight did the same and I set the food in between us. She continued to sniffle to herself and I pulled her into a tight hug. As she leaned her head into my chest, I could feel her body sniffling. Ever so slowly, she stopped sniffling and observed the food.

“You’re not really going to eat all that… are you?” she asked and I shook my head before pulling Lassie out of her hiding spot.

“Nah, Lassie’s gonna get some to,” I stated, then poked around inside the bag of food for the fish. “Where’s the fish?” I asked and Twilight quickly pulled out a small takeout box and opened it, revealing three small morsels of what looked like sushi.

“What’s that?” I asked, and she replied rather calmly.

“Fish?” she stated, in a questioning tone.

“WHAT?!” I gasped, then pulled out the receipt. “I pain sixty bits for… a piece of sushi!” I gasped and Twilight rolled her eyes.

“It’s a delicacy, and besides, I told you this place was expensive,” she stated and my head sagged down in failure.

I pulled out a piece of sushi and gave it to Lassie who quickly gobbled it up. I gave her a second piece before downing the third myself. Twilight pulled out her hay sandwich and leaned her head against my shoulder as we sat eating the retardedly expensive meal together, like a family. We had a mommy, a son, and a puppy, the modern family since back on my world it seemed that everyone was getting divorced.

“Evan?” she whispered and I nodded with a ‘Mmm-hmm?’ “Thank you. I love spending time with you,” she stated and I nodded with a smile.

“I love spending time with you too. And Dash... she’s funny,” I replied and I could tell that Twilight had just rolled her eyes from the last part. I heard Lassie let out an excited growl as she chewed apart the spaghetti container and raided the food baggy.

“LASSIE HEY! I want some too!” I stated, but it was too late. She had her paws in the sauce and was making amuck of the herself and the food. I salvaged what I could of the spaghetti and took a few bread rolls.

“Evan?” Twilight began and I nodded. “Can we do this again?” she asked and I nodded for a second time. She let out a content sigh as she slider herself under my arm, nestling her head attentively against my side.

We sat like that for over an hour, and pretty soon it started to get dark. As I started finishing my food, it started to rain. I muttered a curse and looked to Lassie who was lying peacefully in the bag, completely dirtied with tomato sauce and ranch sauce. Her fur looked like it had been stained right through and she'd be needing a bath pretty soon.

I let out a yawn. “Hey Twi?” I asked, and she replied with a ‘Hmm.’ “I’m gonna take a nap in the truck… and it’s about to rain,” I stated in an exhausted tone. She nodded her head against my shoulder and we both hopped up off the tailgate.

I picked up the food baggy and looked at my puppy who was still napping peacefully. “You can stay in that bag dog,” I chuckled, then slammed the tailgate of my truck.

Twilight and I both hopped into the truck as it started to pour rain. The tapping of rain against the steel roof of my truck was extremely relaxing. I set the food baggy on the back seat floor and leaned my seat back.

Grabbing my cowboy hat and setting the brim over my eyes, I quickly began to pass out, but was awoke by a presence that gently set itself on my chest. I tipped my hat up to notice it was Twilight. She had flipped up the center console and rested the majority of her body on mine.

Figuring there was no point in removing her from atop of me, I simply rested my right arm over her body and slowly surrendered to my exhaustion…

* * *

I stumbled down the stairs of the house and to the basement, then began looking for my work boots. “4:30 is WAYYYY to fucking early to be up,” I muttered as I began sorting through the footwear. I looked out the basement window as a flash of distant lightning brightened the darkened world outside.

“Where the fuck did I fucking put my boots… fuck,” I scowled silently to myself as I couldn’t find them. I scurried back up the stairs and figured that, perhaps, I’d get my jacket first, but was quick to realize that it too was missing.

“Where the fuck…” I trailed off as I continued searching for my work attire. I heard the basement stairs creak and turned to see my mother slowly pacing up the stairs. Her eyes were a bit baggy.

“He… Heey… Hey sonny, wha… Wassup?” she slurred, obviously intoxicated from the large quantity of alcohol she had consumed last night. I just shook my head in disapproval, completely irritated that she’d drink that much despite knowing full well that she had to work the next morning.

“I’m looking for my boots and jacket. I swear that I left them in the basement… but I guess not,” I stated as I scratched my head.

“Oh… oh yeah, you did,” she agreed with me.

“Yeah, but now I can’t find them… shit!” I hissed and she raised her right index finger as if to say something.

“They’re… they’re on the…” she pointed to the front door and I looked to the direction she was pointing, then back to her. She hiccupped and continued pointing to the front door. “Your boots stank, so I threw them on the front porch… with your jacket,” she stated and I nearly lost it.

“WHAT?!” I yelled and she motioned for me to be quiet.

“Sssh… sssh… sssh,” she slurred. “Don’t get mad at me… the whole house stank of shit,” she muttered.

“It did not! I cleaned my boots before I brought them inside to dry!” I scowled and she shook her head.

“No… nope! They still stank, so they went outside,” she replied as she shook her head, nearly losing her balance. Quickly grabbing the counter top beside herself to support her balance, she continued to slur out a sentence, though I interrupted her.

“It’s fucking raining! My stuff’ll be soaked!” I yelled and she got moody about my tone.

“Don’… Don’ take that tone wit’ me… I didn’t know it’d rain,” she replied, and I clenched my fists in anger.

“It was raining last night when I got home!” I gritted my teeth and she let out a drunk, stifled snicker.

“Well… it… it was… stinky, so your stuff had to go outside,” she replied drunkenly. My nose scrunched back as my lips curled. I wanted to tell her so bad that she was a drunk fuck, but I held back the urge to do so.

“FUCK!” I yelled, and again she hushed me.
“Sssh… sssh, you’ll wake grandma,” she hushed me. I covered my face with my hands and let out a very irritated exhale. I ran my fingers through my hair as I clenched my fists against my head…

* * *

Present time…

A crack of nearby thunder immediately woke me from my dream that recalled a distant memory. I shot up with a gasp, breathing with a heavy pace, and sweating just as heavily as I was breathing.

Twilight awoke from my outburst. “Evan!” she gasped, and my breathing started to slow. She rested a hoof on my chest. “You’re breathing so… heavily… and sweating. Is something wrong?” she asked in a worried tone.

I shook my head. “No… no, nothing’s wrong,” I replied. Technically it wasn’t a lie, nothing was wrong at the moment.

“A bad dream?” she asked, and I nodded before leaning back into my seat. She followed me, lying on top of me and resting her head on my chest. “Do you want to talk about it?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Nah, it was nothing important,” I stated and, truthfully, it wasn’t important.

Author's Note

Sorry for the long wait. My brother needed to use my computer for most of last week to finish his homework then at work my hip was acting up so my boss thought he could be a chiropractor and cracked my back, though it ended up just severely hurting me. Anyway, while I got yer attention, thank you to all you readers out there because... well just because thank you. And as for the story, I won't ruin it if you hadn't found out already, but we can kind of tell why the character is so hell bent on considering Twilight like his mom.

Chapter 12

Contains Explicit Scenes

‘I’ll do you in ten seconds flat…’

Tuesday, April 2nd, 2014…

My muscles had really been feeling mushy lately, but with right cause. I hadn’t properly worked out for over a week, due to the whole truck adventure thing. Since four this morning I had been transitioning between sit-ups and push-ups and it was really starting to get to me.

My arms burned as I pushed my torso up off the ground with a grunt. Sweat oozed from my pours and stung my vision. I let out a vocal note that sounded like a mix between a grunt and a hiss.

Naturally, I would’ve just wiped my face with my palms, but they were equally as sweaty. My face tilted itself almost naturally into my shoulder as I tried to cleanse my eyes of the stinging sweat.

My elbows cocked and I lowered myself then, with a grunt, pushed myself back up with a breath of air. Just before I lowered myself again, a body slipped between me and the floor.

“Hey Evan,” Twilight greeted me and I struggled to keep myself from collapsing.

“Twi…” I grunted, but she silenced me and brought a hoof to my mouth.

“Evan, I just wanted to say: thank you for bringing me to dinner last night. It was really nice,” she stated.

“Twilight!” I growled, my body now shaking from strain, but again she kept me silent. Rather than say anything, she just looked at me with a strange look. Finally, after several moments, my body gave out on me and I collapsed. As my near limp body pinned her to the floor, she let out a yelp of shock.

My weight threatened to crush her beneath me, but as soon as I fell over on top of her, I rolled to the side with an exhausted gasp. My body burned from the exertion I had put it through while heavy breathing echoed in the room as I brought my forearm across my face and tried to wipe my eyes dry, but to no avail.

“What was that for?!” Twilight asked in a shocked tone as she rubbed her forehead attentively.

“I… tried to… tell you… not to lay beneath me…” I gasped then struggled together a sentence. “What were you… doing there anyway?” I asked and she thought to herself, probably trying to remember why exactly she was lying underneath me.

“Oh uhm… no reason really,” she stated with a nervous laugh, not answering my question with any sense of mind. I placed my left hand over my face and groaned, then felt a hoof pull my hand away. Twilight peered down on me with a worried look.

“Evan, you’re pushing yourself too hard again. You should go outside and relax a little,” she told me, though I wasn’t sure if it was a suggestion or an order. I nodded and struggled to get up.

I felt a tingly feeling around my back and it felt as if some mystic force was lifting my body up. I tried painfully to look over my shoulder, but all I saw was the floor, then I noticed Twilight’s horn glowing.

I steadied myself then nodded. “Thanks Twi,” I stated, then tried to walk forwards and nearly collapsed as blood rushed to my head.

Twilight lept to her hindlegs and stuffed her head beneath my right arm, placing her left hoof around my back, and helped support my heavy frame. She was… helping me… she was helping me stand because I couldn’t.

She tilted her head and looked up to me with a faint smile. “Don’t worry, I’ve got you,” she said with a bright smile and I felt my emotions start to get to me. “You shouldn’t push yourself so hard. I’d be heartbroken if I lost you. I love you too much,” Twilight stated. Her words of motherly love touched my heart in a way that I couldn’t fight.

My feelings seemed to turn all mushy and tears nearly flooded my eyes. I couldn’t pin it, but her stating that she was there for me… it just killed my mental wall between toughness and emotional sappiness.

She noticed me trying to hold back. “Are you… crying?” she asked and I boldly shook my head with a sniffle.

“Ngh… no… I got sweat in my eyes again… NGH!” I grunted loudly as I tried painfully to wipe away the tears in my eyes. Twilight pulled my hand away and stood nearly face to face with me, if she was about seven inches taller, she’d be at my height when she was on her hindlegs.

“Evan, it’s okay to cry,” she told me with a heartwarming smile. I grunted as I tried even harder to suppress my emotions. I can’t cry, it’s just… I can’t, I’m Burdy!

“I’m not… it’s sweat… it’s making my eyes burn,” I partly lied. In truth, the sweat was kind of burning my eyes, but that’s not where the tears were coming from.

“Evan…” she trailed off and slowly leaned her face forwards. She gave me a gentle peck on the cheek, then nestled her face into mine. “I love you. I love you so much and I’ll always be there for you.” She spoke words that broke me down and I couldn’t hold back. My heart wrenched and I became a blubbering wreck.

I fell to my knees and Twilight dropped down to all fours. I clenched my hands and slammed the base of my fists into the floor, trying to force the emotional distraught away with physical pain.

“Evan! Just… relax, it’s okay,” Twilight tried to comfort me as she rested a hoof on my shoulder and knelt down beside me. My heart began thumping in my chest as I started getting choked up from my sniffles.

“I can’t… I can’t cry… It’s not… not right!” I muttered to myself, trying to rebuild the pride that I had lost. Twilight’s hoof rubbed circles on my back as she nestled up to me.

“Evan, it’s okay to cry. Just let it out,” she offered. I didn’t say anything and started sniffling as I tried to calm myself down. “Evan, what’s wrong?” she asked and I shook my head.

“I don’t know… I DON’T… know.” I gasped as tears blurred my vision. “I ju… I jus… I just get really emotional sometimes,” I stated and Twilight gave me a caring smile.

“You know, keeping your emotions pent up isn’t good,” Twilight informed me and I shook my head.

“It’s not that. Not at all,” I began. “I’m rock hard… most of the time, but…” I trailed off as my pride suffered a second crushing blow. “Sometimes… sometimes when someone who I know really well… like you... when they help me and say that they’re there for me it… it messes me up,” I told her.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to,” she apologized, but I shook my head.

“It’s not your fault…” I trailed off as I finally started getting a grasp on myself. Twilight pulled me into a tight hug as I just stayed stationary on my knees, my arms hanging about freely.

After several minutes, my tears stopped flowing and my breathing returned to normal. I reached my left hand around Twilight and returned her hug, which was kind of awkwardly difficult because I was on my knees and she was on all fours.

“Thank you Twi,” I whispered and she nodded before giving me a more attentive kiss to my cheek. I tilted my face to the side and gave her cheek an attentive kiss in return. Her fur was soft against my lips and her fragrance was invigorating.

“Evan, I do love you, and I will always be there for you,” she told me with a loving tone. After a moment's time we both stood up to our natural heights. I brushed my right hand across her soft cheek as our smiles met.

I sucked back through my nose to get rid of whatever was left from my emotional downfall, then let my bright smile fade to a dimmer one so I wouldn’t look so goofy. “Thanks… mom. I love you,” I told her just how much I loved her and she gave my side a light nudge.

“Now go on, enjoy the day, it’s nice outside. You shouldn't be pent up in this dark gloomy basement when it's sunny out,” she told me. I nodded and began to make my way for the entrance to the library.

* * *

Hours later…

It was now noon time and, after a half an hour of wandering around Ponyville, I decided to change the scenery a bit and go to the lakeside.

The sun beat down on my nearly bare body as I lay on the soft sand of the lakeside. All I had on was a pair of boxer briefs that I used a improvised swimming trunks. Funny, around Ponyville this place was considered a lakeside, yet the texture of the sand was more like a beach shore.

I had plunged my camouflage cargo pants, socks and white V-neck t-shirt in the lake before hanging them on a tree to dry, saving myself from having to wash them at home. My Norinco 870 clone laid resting against the tree trunk. Ever since the whole Daring Do thing, I had made a personal note to bring a gun with me wherever I went, if I could.

As I lay with my hands resting beneath my head, I daydreamed about life. In the beginning, I thought that this world was terrible, I truly did. Magic, ridiculous victories for the ponies, seemingly gay things and an unnaturally peaceful world. But now things were starting to piece themselves together. This place wasn’t quite perfect, 'cause there were things like scammers and black markets, but it still blew the pants off my old world.

“I wonder what Scotty would think of this place…” I mused to myself as I thought about my boss… ex-boss I suppose.

A smirk came across my face as I looked down to my muscular chest. “Mmm… man titties!” I laughed playfully, then gave my left side a bit of a squeeze. My nipples were nice and juicy and kind of looked like strawberries.

My friend Noah’s infamous description of my nipples played through my mind. ‘Volcano nipples,’ and I snickered as I continued to feel myself up. I brought my right arm forwards and flexed, then rubbed my bicep as I fantasized myself being Schwarzenegger.

I stood up and put on a blunt expression as I cocked my elbows on a ninety degree angle with my forearms pointing upwards and flexed. I brought my fists down towards my waist and flexed in a reversed pose, again still with a blunt face, and puffed out my chest a little.

“It uhh it feels fantastic… it is a satisfying as cumming is. Like having sex wit a woman an cumming,” I spoke out one of Schwarzenegger’s famous lines then chuckled to myself as I remembered that I was nowhere close to being as big as him when he won Mr. Olympia.

“Maybe I should just work out for the next few years, then become Mr. Equestria… I wonder if they have that here?” I thought aloud. As I became lost in my thoughts and daydreams, I was caught off-guard by a sky-high scream.

I looked up to see Derpy careening downwards with mail letters fluttering about around her. “I GOT YAH DERPY!” I yelled, then positioned myself beneath her path. As she neared closer, my smile faded as I realized how fast she was going.

“Uh-oh…” was all I really managed before she collided with me and crashed us both into the ground. A mild pain coursed itself through my body as we lay on the sandy shore side, a sand cloud masking our exact location.

As the sand cloud settled, Derpy stood up above me and shook off, particles of sand flicking into my face and making me cringe as I tried to avoid getting it in my eyes.

“Hey Evan… wow, sorry about that. I hit a patch of wind turbulence and lost control. Thanks for saving me again,” she thanked me, while at the same time apologizing for the crash landing.

I stretched out my back and shrugged off the pain. “No problem Derpy, I got your back,” I told her with a nod. A sudden irritation in my groin took my immediate attention as I noticed that sand had gotten into my boxers.

“Drat… I’ll be right back Derpy.” With that, I rushed over to the water and lept in, taking a nice moment to simply float around under the surface of the water. After a moment’s time, I surfaced with a deep breath and whipped my head back, then slicked my hair backwards with my hands.

I turned my attention to where Derpy used to be, but noticed she was no longer present. With a shrug, I muttered to myself, “Huh… guess she was in a hurry.”

“CANNONBALL!” A voice yelled and I looked up at the last possible second, only to see a grey flank slam down just beside me. Despite her weight, the with the momentum force she had built up, her cannonball dive created a fair sized tidal wave that pulled me under.

I lost my breath and choked on the water as I quickly resurfaced. Gasping for air while at the same time hacking to get the water out of my lungs, I wiped the water from my face so that I could see. “Well then...” I muttered to myself just as Derpy surfaced in front of me.

Her mane was drooped to one from the water and she shook her mane about, water slapping every which way, making my eyes naturally clench shut. As I opened them, I looked to Derpy who paddled around playfully, giggling all the while.

A mischievous grin spread across my face as I slowly let myself float beneath the surface. I followed Derpy back to the shallow water, while the theme to Jaws was stuck playing in my head.

Just as the lack of fresh oxygen began to burn my lungs, I burst from the water, vocalizing the climax of the Jaws theme. Derpy looked with shock just as I grabbed her and pulled her under. Her body squirmed about as I held her under the water for a brief moment, gently gripping her sides like I was a shark attacking her.

I quickly resurfaced our bodies, snickering from the rather crude joke. As soon as Derpy resurfaced, she shook her mane, then joined in on the childish play.

We began splashing around, throwing mud at each other, pulling each other under the water and all those sorts of things.

As the day progressed, we finally both settled by the beach with a relaxed and unison sigh. The afternoon sun was nice and gave the world a beautiful haze. “That was fun Derpy,” I said, looking only to the orange afternoon sky.

“Yeah…” she trailed off with a content sigh. “Evan, can you do something for me?” she asked and I nodded.

“Sure, what up?” I asked and, as I looked over, I noticed she was standing up.

“Can you brush me off? I can’t shake off some of the sand in my fur,” she asked and with a nod, I stood up, brushed myself off, then quickly gave her back an attentive rub. “A little more please?” she asked. I continued to stroke my hands through her fur and sand fell free from her mane, tail, and body fur.

As I continued to rub her back, her left hindleg began to tap the ground erratically, almost like a dog. Natural instinct brought my right hand to her head and scratched behind her ears.

She let out a satisfied panting noise and her hindleg cocked up and continued to twitch. Ever so gradually, I finished up with Derpy’s pedicure of sort, and stood up. She shook herself like a dog, starting from the head and letting the shake end at her rear with a whip of her tail.

“Thanks Evan. I’d love to play some more, but I gotta finish my mail route,” she told me then zoomed off. I let out a groan of satisfaction, grabbed my clothes and gun, then started making my way back to Ponyville.

* * *

Half an hour later…

My boots clustered up puffs of dusty sand as I moseyed through the town. It was like it had suddenly became abandoned, almost like when I had first arrived with Chrysalis. “HEY EVERYPONY, IT’S ME, BURDY, THAT THING THAT LIVES IN TWILIGHT’S BASEMENT!” I yelled out, though nopony returned my call.

I scratched my head, wondering to myself just exactly what was going on. “Huh… well that’s weird. Usually there’s ‘Somepony’ around…” I trailed off as I continued through the town, searching for any signs of desertion.

As I neared the library, I heard a faint voice in the near distance. I tuned in my hearing and listened, something about: great powerful ixy…

I shrugged and started making my way over, and as I did so, the voice got more distinguishable. Whoever was speaking, spoke in third person. Judging by the voice, it was female and, by the sounds things, she was pretty boastful.

I turned a corner around a small house and spotted a large crowd, probably the whole town population, and a center stage. On the stage was a blue unicorn with a dorky wizard hat and cape.

“THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE IS THE BEST PONY!” the mare, whom I’m assuming was Trixie, boasted. I heard several groans come from the crowd, but two cheers echoed.

Two young colts raced to the front of the stage and began worshiping the mare, stating that Trixie should forgive the town for being so ignorant towards her. Suddenly I heard Twilight call out to the mare. “Trixie, would you please stop with this nonsense?” Twilight asked in a rather polite tone.

“Ha! Trixie knew you would try to duke Trixie, but she is too smart for you. Trixie has figured out your secret, Twilight Sparkle! And now Trixie is more powerful than you, even with your new alicorn prowess!” Trixie announced.

I pushed myself through the crowd, wondering how exactly there could be roadshow magicians if there were already vast amounts of magic in this world. I mean, how can you be better then somepony else at levitating a cup of coffee without touching it? Either you can or you can’t.

“What’s crackin?” I asked, mostly directed to Twilight.

“What’s crackin? What’s crackin?!” Trixie yelled, almost as if I had just insulted her. “How could you not know ‘what’s crackin?’ Everypony knows ‘The Great and Powerful TRIXIE!'” she yelled out and I simply scratched my forehead.

“Uhm, well… nice to meet you, Great and Powerful Trixie, I’m Evan, but yah can call me Burdy if you like,” I stated as I extended my hand to greet her. She turned her nose up at my kindness and sneered.

“HA! Trixie doesn’t want your friendship! Trixie is better than anypony here!” she announced in a snooty voice.

“Man, you’re a cunt,” I stated bluntly, making her and Twilight both gasp. I motioned with my hand like I was apologetic. “Sorry, sorry, it slipped. What I meant to say is that you’re a vagina… nah, cunt sounds better. But really, why do you have to be such a bitch?” I asked, making her gasp even louder.

“YOU DARE INSULT THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE?!” she thundered and I rolled my eyes.

“Well I wouldn’t have thought you were a bitch until you insulted everypony here by saying you were better than them,” I snapped back. She gave a ‘humph!’ and flung her head to one side, swishing her mane in the process.

“Trixie 'Is' better than everypony here. Anything anypony can do, Trixie can do better!” she announced, causing several more groans to emit from the crowd. “If nopony dares to challenge me, then it’s settled, Trixie is the best,” Trixie stated aloud.

I nudged Twilight, “Get up there and do something magical,” I offered and Twilight gave me a ‘Really?’ look. “Well shit, I don’t know. I just don’t feel like having this thing all like: ‘Trixie is the best, ooh, ahh!’” I stated, mocking Trixie’s voice.

“How dare you insult Trixie further! You should be punished severly!” she yelled, and at that comment, the two younger stallions ran over and began beating my legs, though their hits didn’t even deter my stance. “Enough, he has suffered!” Trixie announced and I raised an eyebrow.

“Really? That wasn’t even a beating. Christ, the way you were talking I thought you'd have tried to hang me, then I'd have to blow you away.” I told her my thoughts and again Trixie laughed.

“Ha, you could not! Because anything you could do, I could do better, and I’d block any pithy attempts of yours!” Trixie stated in a boastful voice.

I sighed and raised an eyebrow. “Really? You really want to do this?” I asked and she continued to taunt me. “Fine,” I replied casually then crawled up onto the stage. The blue unicorn kept the stupid grin on her face while I stepped back to the opposite side of the stage.

“What’s wrong? Stage fright?” she taunted and I smirked.

“Oh, I don’t think I’m gonna be the one with stage fright,” I told her as I unslung the Norinco 870 clone. In an instant, I racked the pump and lined up a shot then blew away a chunk of stage right in front of her.

Everypony gasped from the thunderous gunshot and Trixie was left wide eyed as I racked the slide, then leveled the gun on her. “Next shot blows you away,” I told her and she began to shake in fear.

“You… you wouldn’t!” she stuttered and my trigger-finger slipped into the trigger guard. She fell to her knees and my aim followed her. After several moments, she broke into a furry of tears. “Please! Please don’t kill Trixie! She takes back what she said. She is nothing, less than dirt!” Trixie whimpered.

“DASH! Time?” I asked and Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow.

“Huh?” she asked, completely confused about what was going on.

“How long did it take for me to make her drop to her knees and beg for mercy?” I asked and Dash scratched her head in thought.

“I dunno… about twenty seconds I guess,” she stated and I nodded before stepping over to Trixie.

“I made you beg for mercy in twenty seconds. Do better than that against me,” I told her and she tried to grasp the moment but simply couldn’t, she was still too shaken from the experience.

“I… I can’t,” she replied, using proper English rather than referring to herself in third person.

“Well, I guess that means you’re not better than everypony here…” I knelt down and snarled into her ear. “Everypony should be considered equal, so don’t ever act like that towards my friends again, yah got that… punk!” I snarled and she nodded, weeping terribly.

I hopped off the stage as the crowd started dispersing. “Evan!” Twilight gasped as she and Spike rushed over to me. “You weren’t really contemplating killing her… were you?” she asked in a very worried voice.

I shrugged. “Nah. There were too many kids around and besides, she’s not that bad, just a tad bit rude,” I reported then looked to Spike. “Well… I’m hungry, let’s get something to eat,” I stated and just as I said so, Dash landed beside me.

“Oh hey, speaking of eating, I know a great restaurant,” Dash began but Twilight cut her off.

“NO! No more burping contests! We’ll go home and cook something, besides, it’s less expensive that way,” Twilight countered, to the discomfort of both Dash and I.

“Man, for a princess, she sure is cheap,” I muttered and Twilight raised an eyebrow.

“What was that?” she asked in an inquiring voice and I shrugged.

“Nothing, I just said that we should get some sheep,” I lied and she obviously knew what I had really said because she gave me a sour look. As we left, I didn’t bother looking back at Trixie, figuring she’d probably bugger off somewhere else and start a problem in another town.

As soon as we got back to the library, Twilight sent Spike to start making dinner, then immediately began to lecture me. “Evan, that was completely irresponsible. I have no idea how those gun things work, but what if something went wrong and somepony got hurt?!” Twilight was nearly booming at me.

I shrugged then gulped, kind of feeling guilty about how unsafe I had been, but then just shrugged. “Well… it shut her up,” I laughed and Twilight scowled.

“That was one of the stupidest things you have ever done. I can’t believe you’d do that!” Twilight scolded me and I flinched.

“Okay, I’m sorry,” I apologized and she sighed.
“I just… sometimes I don’t know what to do with you,” Twilight stated angrily and I sighed, then pulled her into a hug.
“I’m sorry mom, I just wasn’t thinking, okay? I’m really sorry,” I apologized and I felt her sigh into my chest as we just stood there, embracing each other in a hug. I could tell it would be a while before she got over this one.

* * *

The next morning…

I had gotten to bed pretty late last night, having wanted to complete my work out that I hadn’t finished earlier that morning. Now I was kind of regretting not going to bed before 11pm.

My body felt weak and sluggish, usually rebelling against any action that I wanted to do. I groaned groggily as I staggered up the stairs, taking a brief glance at my watch. It was nearly noon.

I had passed out with yesterday’s clothes still on and they stank a little of old sweat. Looking around, I noticed that no one was home except me.

I moved to the kitchen and grabbed a bowl of Fruity Hoops. “They’re superb!” I laughed silently to myself as I sat down. Today the cereal tasted absolutely wonderful, probably because of my recent withdrawal to it.

After the first bowl was devoured, I poured myself a second, then called it quits. I yawned before leaping onto the couch and grabbing the remote. The TV was kind of puny and Twilight stated that: Television rots your brain.

I highly doubted that was true and flicked on the television. As I browsed through the three channels that we had, I realized that television probably would rot my brain if all I had to watch was nature documentaries and the news.

I quickly turned off the TV, grabbed my Norinco shotgun, and made my way for the door. “I guess I could use some fresh air,” I muttered, then paced outside.

The sky was nice, sunny and clear. I looked back to the landscape and noticed that everypony was missing again. I sighed before moving towards where Trixie had her stage wagon, muttering silent curses to myself.

“I swear to fucking god, if that bitch is ripping on my friends again…” I continued swearing then nearly halted in my path as I noticed that all that was left of Trixie’s stage performance was a few splinters of wood, probably the handy work of my shotgun.

Looking around and still spotting nopony in sight, I scratched my head in confusion, then began to walk towards the opposite end of town. “Maybe she moved her performance to the other end of town.” I started thinking up random possibilities, then stopped as I mentioned zombies.

“Zombies aren’t real,” I told myself. ‘Well not back on our world, but here, unicorns are real,’ my conscience thought back. I quickly racked the slide on my Norinco as my heart began to thump. ‘Zombies can’t be real, zombies can’t be real, zombies can’t be…’

The hairs on the back of my neck prickled up and a shiver went down my spine. My feet pivoted as I spun around and readied for a fight, but was thankful not to see any flesh rotten pony zombies.

Still my senses stayed on high alert. Looking around, I saw nothing. A grey streak of motion caught my upwards attention and I looked up, only to see Derpy crashing downwards in a spiral motion.

“Oh crap!” I muttered. I unloaded the shell in my shotgun and set it aside, then readied myself to catch Derpy… again.

“Derpy! I got yah! Again...” I yelled out to her as she continued to careen downwards. As she got closer, I began to cringe, sure that this collision would be just as painful as yesterday'.

As I felt the impact, my whole body got tense and my feet slid across the ground, but I managed to stay standing. After a few moments, my eyes unclenched and I looked to the shivering mare in my arms. “Derpy… how is it that you continue to find yourself in… crashing predicaments?” I asked and she shrugged.

“Turbulence,” she stated back in her dopey voice and I nodded. “Thanks for saving me again!” she squealed and squeezed me in a tight hug.

“Say Derpy… what are you up to anyway?” I asked, seeing that she didn’t have her mail uniform on.
“Oh, I was gonna come and see if you wanted to play,” she replied and I nodded, then quickly returned to the task at hand.

“Well sure, but first we gotta find everypony… I think there might have been a zombie apocalypse,” I informed her playfully and she gasped in fear.

“Oh no! Really!” she cried out fearfully and I shrugged.

“I dunno. Maybe. I can’t find anypony,” I told her and she grabbed me, then shook me in a frantic way.

“Please, say it isn’t so! What if nopony but us is left! What’ll we do?!” she cried out and I rested a relaxing hand on her shoulder as she hummed about above the ground.

“Well, I don’t think there’s really a zombie apocalypse, but that still doesn’t change the fact that nopony is around,” I explained and Derpy brushed some sweat from her brow with a ‘phew’.

“Don’t worry, I saw a bunch of ponies at the north end of town. I think the circus is in town because there’s a magician there!” she informed me and I groaned.

“Come on Derpy, let’s go!” I said in a lightly angered tone. We rushed through the empty streets and I could already here Trixie’s boastful attitude.

“Bow down before the greatest unicorn that walks the land. You are not worthy to be in his presence!” Trixie yelled out and I gritted my teeth. She sounded worse than yesterday and I thought she would’ve learned her lesson by now.

As we burst around the final corner, I spotted a bigger stage than before with two unicorns on the stage, and that’s when it struck me. The voice that was boasting didn’t belong to Trixie, it was masculine of sorts.

“The Almighty Tristan The Great declares you all his slaves! Any who try to leave will be punished!” he roared and a very dark purple magic shield bubble surrounded the city limits of Ponyville. Whoever this stallion was, he looked kind of like Trixie, except he was a stallion, so his facial features were squared. His fur, like Trixie’s, was blue, but was a darker shade of blue. He didn’t wear a dorky hat like Trixie and let his mane flow freely, his mane being a lighter complexity of blue than his body fur. He was wearing a black cloak that concealed most of his body.

“What the fuck is this shit!” I yelled and everypony’s stare turned to me. That’s when I noticed something else. Trixie was also on stage, though she was on her knees like a slave and had a dog collar around her neck that was attacked to a leash.

“Evan, do that thing like you did yesterday!” Dash called out and I declined by waving my hand.

“Sorry, I can’t. Twilight gave me shit for that yesterday,” I apologized and Dash gasped.

“What?! But it might be the only way we can save Ponyville,” Dash replied and I was lost.

“Wait, hold on! What’s going on?” I asked in a confused tone, still lost with what was happening.

“Trixie has an older brother who’s deranged and…” she was cut off by a thunderous crack of lightning.

“SILENCE! Tristan is not deranged!” the darker blue unicorn on stage roared.

“He’s enslaved the town!” Dash informed me and I shrugged with a baffled look on my face.

“How did he ‘Enslave’ the town. Why didn’t Twilight or somepony just beat him in a magic competition or something?” I asked curiously and Dash pointed over to the stage as the crowd moved to the side, showing me that Twilight, Rarity, Applejack and Fluttershy were all on leashes as well.

“Well what about you?! Why didn’t you do something fast that he couldn’t do?!” I asked and Dash gulped.

“I can’t,” she stated then showed me her back, revealing it to be void of wings. My breath was taken. I didn’t know magic could take away parts of a pony’s body. That’d be like taking away somepony’s leg.

“You gotta do that thing you did yesterday with Trixie!” Dash stated just as Tristan hopped down from the stage.

“HA! He couldn’t do anything that would deter my power!” Tristan laughed and I rolled my eyes just as he tossed a collar at me. “Put that on slave. Everypony in town needs to wear one,” he told me and I spat at the collar.

“I ain’t no slave, I ain’t no pony, and there’s no way in hell I’m putting that thing on like a dog,” I snarled and he laughed.

“You dare challenge Tristan?” he inquired and Dash nodded.

“He sure does!” Dash accepted the challenge for me, even though I didn’t really want to.

“Ha-ha-ha!" His laugh was... weird and seemed very forced. "What could you possibly do that Tristan couldn’t?” He laughed snidely and I groaned furiously at Dash for getting me into this.

Dash gave me a nudge. “Come on, blast him!” she told me and I shook my head. “I can’t do it, it’s too foolish. Twi and I went over this yesterday,” I stated.

“Evan just…” Twilight began but Tristan’s eyes flashed red.

“SILENCE!” He roared and everything seemed to sit still as he turned back to me, his flashing red eyes turning back to a dark violet. “Now show Tristan what you got… ape!” he taunted me and I curled my lips.

“Fine…” I snarled then paced around him so that just in case a pellet of buckshot ricocheted off the ground it wouldn’t hit anypony. I racked the slide, loading a fresh shell into the chamber, then fired it at his hooves but he just stood there, completely undaunted by the show of aggression.

“Beg for mercy!” I snarled and he laughed as his horn glowed in a very dark, almost black, purple aura, then suddenly Derpy was pulled over to him, her body caught in a flashing aura.

“You first,” he ordered as a sickly knife was levitated to Derpy’s neck. I gasped in anger as the knife was pressed against Derpy’s throat, threatening to slit it. “Fall to your knees and beg… beg like a dog,” he ordered.

I gawked for a moment in shock. “Gah… ugh…” was all I managed and the knife pressed threateningly harder against Derpy’s throat. “WAIT!” I yelled with a gasp then tossed my shotgun aside.

I fell to my knees and held my hands forwards as if I was praying to him. “Please… don’t,” I pleaded and he laughed, then spat at me.

“Is that the best you’ve got?! I want to hear you sniveling, grovel before the almighty Tristan!” he boomed. I scurried over to him and placed my hands literally inches before Derpy, who was being held in front of his body, then bowed before him.

“Please, pleasepleaseplease PLEASE! Don’t do that! I beg of you,” I groveled, nearly breaking down into tears. Tristan laughed then tossed Derpy aside before observing my disgraceful state.

“Look at you… completely weak… helpless… worthless,” he taunted then thought to himself before levitating over my shotgun and examining it. “I saw your battle with my younger sister… and I sought through your feelings. You think that you’re tough as nails, but you’re softer than butter on the inside.” He stated, then floated the gun down to me.

I looked up to him and he snickered. “Go ahead… do it. Kill me, kill me in front of all these foals, fillies, and colts,” he taunted, somehow knowing full well that I wouldn’t. He jammed the gun into my hands. “Do it!” he scowled.

Moments past and I just stayed there, on my knees, looking down disgracefully upon myself. “Kill me and the town will be freed! If not, then you’ll be banned from Ponyville forever, forbidden to ever return,” he stated.

I continued to just stay in that exact pose. “Fine, so be it!” he roared, then blasted me with a powerful bolt of energy that emitted from his horn. My shotgun was ripped from my hands as I was propelled out of Ponyville.

The shield barrier opened just enough for me to fly through. As I landed, I expected it to kill me, but instead I was hurtled relentlessly across the ground, tumbling and skipping about painfully.

As my body finally skidded to a stop, I thought the pain was over. Of course, life is brutal, and something crashed into me, sending my body skidding a few feet further. I groaned and gritted my teeth as I lay for minutes, face down in the disgusting dirt. After a a few more minutes, I twisted my view a bit and looked to what had hit me. I spotted Derpy, though she looked brutal. She was lying face up, blood leaking down her mane and covering her face.

Blood stained her fur and her eyes were closed. “Oh god… no please…” I whispered as I painfully crawled over. I collapsed just beside her and felt her neck for a pulse. Luckily she must be a tough mare, because her pulse was strong, but she was unconscious nonetheless. A tear trickled down from my right eye. I could've killed him but I didn't and because of that, Derpy was hurt badly... because of me. My fists clenched in anger and blood seeped out from between my fingers. "Derpy... Derpy I'm so sorry..." I wept painfully and grunted several times in anger. I had let Tristan fuck up one of my best friends... my BEST friend, all because I didn't shoot him.

Severe pain coursed through my body as I stood up and placed Derpy on my shoulder. My truck was in town, so heading to Canterlot to ask Celestia for help was out of the question. Fluttershy had been taken captive, so she wouldn’t be at her cottage.

“What the fuck am I going to do?” I thought to myself as I began to stagger aimlessly. Blood stained through my cargo pants and made apparent of more wounds that I hadn’t known about when I first crash landed.

“I need a healing potion…” I trailed off as my thoughts turned to that of the first healing potion I had ever taken, and perhaps the only one in Equestria who could help me right now…

* * *

Ponyville, third person…

Tristan laughed maniacally as he turned the library into his main HQ. “Ah-ha! This is perfect! The perfect throne, for a perfect ruler!” he cheered his triumph, then swallowed dryly.

He looked to Twilight. “You, wench, get me a drink!” Tristan roared. Twilight went to refuse, but the collar around her neck gave her a painful zap. “That’s right, if you disobey me, you’ll get buzzed!” he laughed insanely.

“Yah ain’t bein very nice!” Applejack shot out and Tristan snickered as she too was zapped painfully. Twilight reluctantly began trotting towards the kitchen while Tristan lay back in his seat.

Dash and Fluttershy flapped their wings lightly, giving Tristan a slight, cool breeze. He had recently given them back their wings but only for this exact purpose, anything else would result in a painful zap. He did so enjoy having the competitive pegasus serving him, it was so ironic and cruel, making him relish in his own devilish nature.

“Brother, why are you being like this?” Trixie pleaded and Tristan leaned his neck back with a sly look spread across his face. The gleam of some sort of amulet flashed briefly, making the five element bearer’s gasp in shock, Twilight not being present as she was still fetching Tristan a drink.

“That’s… that’s the alicorn amulet!” Rarity gasped and Tristan nodded in reply.

“Indeed it is. Good eyes,” he stated then rubbed the amulet attentively with his hoof. “With my powers already going through the roof before I found it, I was a respected and well known magician, but after I found it…” he trailed off as a look of evil spread across his face and his eyes flashed a dark shade of red. “Ponies feared me for my abilities. They worshiped me like a god, in fear of what I might do if displeased. Something you’ll all learn very quickly,” he stated then looked to Dash.

“Stop beating those wings so hard! You’ll give me pneumonia!” Tristan scowled and Dash obliged with a burning hate for the stallion.

* * *

Everfree forest, Zecora’s hut, Evan’s perspective…

I held the cold, damp cloth to my pained face. Zecora didn’t have enough potion to heal both Derpy and myself, so I had told that she should heal me only enough so that I could manage to properly walk, then use the rest on Derpy.

Though it healed her up very nicely, Derpy was still in mediocre pain when she awoke. Now late in the evening, Derpy had gone back to sleep in hopes of simply sleeping off the pain, while I conversed with Zecora about what to do.

“You are very humble to offer her the majority of the healing supplies,” Zecora expressed her thoughts about me in truth, not rhyming at my request.

“Yeah, well… she needs it more,” I replied and Zecora nodded, knowing that I could cope with the pain far better than Derpy probably could. I grimaced, then applied more pressure to the cloth on my face.

“Can you make more healing potions?” I asked and Zecora nodded.

“Yes, but I will require more ingredients,” she told me. Without her rhyming tune, she was actually quite easy to understand. I stood up painfully and gasped as my body threatened to simply give out on me.

“Come on… let’s get some ingredients then,” I said and Zecora raised an eyebrow.

“Are you sure? It is late, and predators have not ate,” she spoke a rhyme, probably by accident.

“Hey… what have I said about rhyming?” I chuckled with a grimace of pain and she nodded, then grabbed her saddle bags before leading me out of the hut, locking the door behind her.

“There are not many herbs needed to make a healing potion, and are generally easy to find,” she stated, then picked a random flower from the ground.

“What’s that?” I asked and she shook her head.

“It is not an ingredient we need, but its fragrance is nice indeed,” she spoke another rhyme, but before I could reply, I caught a whiff of the flower. It smelt like vanilla and was actually quite nice.

She placed the vanilla smelling flower in her mane and continued to lead me deeper into the forest. The night ambience made me shiver, especially when I heard the howls of wolves.

I had nothing but my fists and boots to fight with and, by my count, that wasn’t a lot. Zecora suddenly bent over in front of me and I accidentally bumped into her, knocking her to the ground. “Shit, sorry… I wasn’t looking,” I apologized, then helped her up.

She looked to the ground with a sigh and pointed to the plants that her body had crushed when I had knocked her over. “We had needed those plants, but now we will need to find another patch. Keep your eyes open.” Luckily she didn’t speak in a rhyme, so I understood her.

We paced further into the forest before finally stopping again. The howls of wolves seemed to get closer and closer with each cry to the moon. As a kid I had always wondered why wolves howled to the moon. “They say that Timberwolves howl to the moon because they miss her… Nightmare Moon,” Zecora answered my question and I raised an eyebrow.

“I’ve heard stories but…” I trailed off and Zecora snickered.

“Let me guess? You thought they were ‘gay’?” she asked and I gave a mixture of a nod and a shake of my head.

“Not quite. I wasn’t exactly sure why she was given such a brutal punishment. I mean, yeah, she turned the world into eternal darkness but, I mean, what’s so bad about nighttime? I mean, the moon is still bright right?” I asked and Zecora snickered.

“Dear colt… err, man. You have much to learn. Nightmare Moon’s night brought the cool temperatures that killed off most plants that thrived in hot conditions. The lack of sunlight, which had provided nutrients, soon started killing off crops and ponies started falling into eternal slumbers,” Zecora told me the story and I gulped with a nervous chuckle.

“Oh… I guess that would settle it… ow,” I muttered as pain shot through my ribs.

“Why did you not just kill him? You seemed willing to kill of Chrysalis without a second thought, so why show this… Tristan, a soft side?” Zecora asked and I gulped.

“I… I uhm… foals were around, and the collateral damage of a shotgun at point-blank would traumatize a foal’s memories forever,” I partly lied. It wasn’t a complete lie, there were foals in the crowd that would be traumatized by it, but the real reason was much more complex. ‘If only I had the chance after he had hurt Derpy, I would’ve gutted him like a fish,’ I thought to myself.

“Well, just remember, those ponies need your help now more than ever and sometimes the right decision isn’t the easiest made,” she informed me. I began wandering in my thoughts and suddenly I had a potion bottle being waved in my face.

“Here, drink this. It should heal the rest of your wounds,” she told me and I nodded, but stopped before taking a sip. I stuck my tongue out in mild disgust. There were chunks of leaves and bits of roots in the potion but I guess I shouldn't be complaining because she had brewed it on the spot.

“What about Derpy, she’s still in pain,” I stated and Zecora nodded before showing me the second bottle that she had made. I nodded in acceptance then tilted back the bottle and chugged back the entirety of the bottle’s contents.

It tasted pretty bad, but the effects were nearly instantaneous. I felt all my wounds seal shut, the pains searing throughout my body immediately stopped, and I felt better overall. “So what now?” I asked and Zecora shrugged.

“We will have to think of a plan, but for now you need to rest,” she offered a plan and I nodded before we started back towards her hut.

* * *

Ponyville Library, third person…

Tristan sat and yawned to himself in an un-amused way. “Tristan grows bored, entertain him, wenches!” he ordered in a vulgar tone. Not sure how to entertain him, his ‘servants’ simply looked to him and he scowled silently to himself.

“You, yellow wench, get Tristan some wine! You, pink wench, play some music!" He ordered then thought to himself. Play something... slow and… kinky…” Tristan said as he started to become aroused. Fluttershy immediately rushed off to fetch some wine while Pinkie started to play some ‘kinky’ music with several musical instruments at once.

“Indeed…” Tristan breathed heavily as he tapped his hooves together. “It has been quite some time since Tristan has been… entertained,” he mused to himself as his member started to grow.

“You…” he trailed of and pointed to the group. “Come here and… entertain me,” he ordered and they all stood in confusion, not sure which one he wanted. Tristan rolled his eyes in aggravation. “The pretty one, Tristan wants the pretty one!” he roared like a foal during a temper tantrum and Rarity gulped as she took a regretful step forwards.

“Not you, ugly slut!” he spat and Rarity was nearly heartbroken from being called such vulgar terms. “I want… you,” he licked his lips lustfully, no longer using a third person persona, and again pointed to the group. “Sister… step forwards,” he stated with a deep inhale.

“That’s disgusting!” Dash spat and Rarity chimed in.

“Lust for a relative is just simply repulsive!” Rarity gasped and Applejack looked side to side.

“Yeah… incest is… wrong,” she pitched in, glancing side to side in a hesitation of nervous motion.

“Shut your mouths!” Tristan ordered and motioned for Trixie to step forwards, who slowly walked shamefully forwards. Tristan leaned back and licked his lips while he rubbed his hooves together in anticipation.

Trixie took a deep breath as she stood before him, not making eye contact with her lustful brother. Tristan leaned forwards and placed his right hoof under Trixie’s chin and gently tilted her head up so their eyes locked. “Entertain me, dear sister,” Tristan spoke soft and gentle words.

He once again leaned back with a smug smile on his face as he took a deep, relaxed breath. Trixie turned, not making eye contact with any of the other mares in the room. A lone tear trickled down her face, it wasn’t a tear of sadness, it was a tear of pained shamefulness.

Ever so slowly, she began to sway her flank in a seductive way, all the while keeping her sorrows to herself. Tristan let out a satisfied sigh as he watched his sister contently. For the moment, Trixie pulled her cape down low to conceal the view of her nethers, though that Tristan paid little mind.

“Closer, I want to nearly feel your presence,” Tristan ordered. Trixie let out a quiet sniffle and stepped back so that her flank was a mere three inches from Tristan’s body, and continued her erotic dance.

She constantly wiggled her flank above Tristan’s groin, teasing him in a non-contact way, also driving his urges wild. His member quickly grew to its full length and twitched furiously, thriving for the feel of sex.

“Turn around sister, for I wish to see your face while you dance,” Tristan stated, his vocabulary no longer being in a third person persona whatsoever. Trixie slowly turned and straddled herself above her own brother, still allowing herself a few inches between herself and her brother’s throbbing member.

Trixie swayed her hips from side to side, then would dive at a slow pace, but stop just before her entrance touched the tip of his shaft. A content ‘Mmm’ left Tristan’s mouth as he became extremely aroused.

Now with the need for sex driving his body insane, Tristan placed his fore-hooves at Trixie’s sides, gripping her hips with a gentle hold. “Sister… it’s been too long since we’ve last played,” Tristan stated.

Rarity looked away in disgust. “This is just repulsive. I can’t believe anypony would ever do that with a relative, it’s just… wrong.” The white unicorn nearly gagged. Twilight thought to herself briefly. She had never asked Evan how deeply he believed that she was his mother. He had at times stated that he understood that she was not his true birth mother, but she wondered if he would have the same attitude towards her as Rarity did towards Tristan's disgusting behaviour. She did admit, what Tristan was doing was dastardly and that he should be punished severely, but how, she did not know.

Tristan began to wiggle his hips a little, nearly driven insane by the anticipation of it. Tristan leaned his face towards Trixie’s, but she did not return the action. “Come now sister, remember all the fun times we had back home in the thickets behind our home?” Tristan recalled painful memories for Trixie.

Trixie’s mind burned with the memories of Tristan capturing her body in a levitation spell, then forcing her into sexual acts in the thicket bushes behind their childhood home. She always swore that she’d tell their parents, but Tristan threatened it would not be wise to do so.

A stifled sob emitted from Trixie’s mouth and Tristan cupped her cheek with his hoof. “Come now sister, this is how ponies express love for one another,” Tristan stated and Applejack lashed out.

“AH AIN’T GONNA STAND FER THIS. IT AIN’T RIGHT!” she yelled and the six element bearer’s charged in unison. Tristan’s horn flared and they were knocked back by a propulsion spell.

“You have forgotten your places!” Tristan roared and the six mares felt a painful jolt of electricity surge through their bodies. His horn now fading, the brutal unicorn stallion turned his attention back to his sister.

“Now sister, what say we have some fun?” Tristan asked. Trixie didn’t say anything and Tristan simply forced his lips upon Trixie's. Twilight thought to herself again, ‘Am I forcing myself upon Evan? I know it’s not as severe, but what if I am, in a way, doing this to him? Maybe he feels the same way Trixie does… abused,’ Twilight thought to herself.

In truth, she didn’t know what to think. Evan didn’t show discomfort when Twilight tried to make an advance on him, but he did state that one time that sex with her wouldn’t be right. The thought left her mind immediately as she heard Trixie moan in discomfort.

Tristan forced his tongue into Trixie’s unwilling mouth and explored her depths. The mare tried to pull away, but Tristan held her head close to his and continued slobbering the inside of her mouth with his tongue.

“This is insane, somepony has to stop this!” Dash yelled, but didn’t make a move, knowing full well what would happen. Tristan pulled his mouth away from his sister’s, then looked to her with loving eyes, but his gaze was not returned.

The stallion rested his head on her shoulder before lining up his member with Trixie’s entrance. “Please brother… don’t,” Trixie begged through a sob.

“Sssh sister, I promise that you’ll enjoy it. I’ve learned some new moves since the last time that we…” he trailed off and, with one powerful jolt. He thrusted himself into his sister, her depths taking his full length with the single motion.

Trixie cried out in a mix of pain and pleasure, though mostly pain. Tristan stayed stationary for a moment’s time, savoring the feel of having his sister’s inner walls hug his cock that throbbed inside of her, nearly ready to blow.

“Oh sister… your snatch is so tight.” He tried to talk dirty to spice things up for his unmotivated sister, but all it did was scar her more. He pulled himself out at a sluggish pace, any faster and he would’ve blown.

As his length left her entrance, her walls sealed up again and she was thankful to have him out of her body for the time being. “That was a little too tight for my liking, but I know how to fix that,” Tristan stated, then spat on his hoof and used it to lubricate his cock.

Trixie’s breathing was raspy and filled with sorrowful sobs of shame. “Sssh sister, for I love you so…” Tristan stated then slowly delved himself back inside of her, still on the edge of his orgasm. “Mmm… you’re such a good fuck,” he muttered as he started to slowly thrust himself inside of her, trying furiously to keep himself outside the boundaries of an orgasm.

As he slowly continued his thrusts, Trixie tried painfully to think of something else, but all she could think of was the member being stuff inside of her. She could feel it spreading her walls, leaving, then spreading her again. Each time his cock left her, she felt the need to have him fill her again, though it was a primal, more sexual desire, rather than her actual desire, which was to be rid of him forever.

Not a single moan was emitted from Trixie, which bothered Tristan greatly. “Sister… moan for me. I want to hear your vocal notes of love,” Tristan stated, but as she opened her mouth to moan, all that came out was an emotionally pained sob. Tristan groaned, wanting more than just a cheap fuck.

He lifted his head higher than his sister’s and placed his tongue at the base of her horn. Slowly sliding his tongue upwards, Trixie shivered as pleasure soared through her body.

As the male unicorn’s tongue reached the tip of his sister’s horn, he slowly enveloped her horn with his mouth. Trixie’s mouth opened and a mix of a sob and a moan was emitted. Tristan smiled while he continued to suck off his sister’s horn, ceasing with his cock movements for the moment at hoof.

His head slowly bobbed up and down and Trixie continued to shiver. The six mares present in the room were disgusted by the sight in front of them and they’d all much rather be somewhere else, but Tristan had forbid them to leave, for he needed them to cater to his every will.

As Trixie’s pleasure increased, a feeling was building up in her groin area and Tristan continued his horn sucking until Trixie’s pleasure nearly reached its peak. Her sobbing moans soon ceased and despite her will power, her body gave in. Moans of pleasure were emitted constantly from her mouth. “See sister, I told you that you’d enjoy it,” Tristan stated and Trixie turned her face away in self-pity, hating her body for enjoying the feel of his actions.

The lustful stallion began to pump his sister again, rocking his hips up and down in a paced and slow motion, enjoying her now slick vagina. Trixie began to sniffle again as even more tears fell from her eyes. Tristan began to care even less about his sister’s pleasure as he began to pump his sister harder, quickly building himself up.

As he continued, Trixie’s body began to move by itself. Her hips slapped against his in unison motion. It was as if she had no control over her body as it thrived for the burning desire to achieve an orgasm. Juices seeped from her pussy and dripped to the throne beneath their bodies. A slapping sound started to echo in the room as Tristan's balls started slapping against her rump.

Trixie felt her walls clasping around his cock as he continued to shove himself deeper and deeper with each thrust. She knew he was close, and soon enough, she felt him start to swell. “Tristan, pull out,” Trixie sobbed, but Tristan paid no mind and continued pumping away.

His thrusts became erratic and unpredictable. “Tristan… pull out!” Trixie told him in a stern voice, but still he didn’t pay her any mind. “PULL OUT!” Trixie cried and tried to dismount him, but Tristan’s grip around her hips tightened and he pulled her body down on top of his.

He kept her tight to him, their chests rubbing together as his cock delved to her deepest depths, then he pushed just a bit harder and his cock bottomed out against her cervix. He pulled back, then slammed against her with brutal force, sending Trixie’s body into a relentless orgasm. He hindlegs spasmed and refused to cooperate, while the rest of her body shuddered from the pleasure that was coursing itself through her body.

Climatic moans left Trixie's mouth as she began to mindlessly thrust herself against her brother's shaft, completely lost in her orgasmic state. As her walls clasped themselves against Tristan's cock, he began to grunt loudly and snort as he thrusted against her motions. Pussy juices lathered his cock and made humping her an easy breeze. Squelching noises competed with the music that Pinkie was playing and made the six element bearer' drop their heads in shamefulness, there was nothing they could do to stop this atrocity.

Just as his cock bottomed out against the mare’s cervix for a second time, he let go of his boundaries. His cock swelled up inside of his sister's tight snatch and he grunted loudly as he reached his peak.

Jets of hot, sticky cum blasted into Trixie, first it pushed through her cervix and filled her womb, but with nowhere else to go, it quickly filled up the rest of her cunt. Tristan’s cock continued to surge, blasting out tidal wave after tidal wave of cum. In a matter of seconds he had filled up her vagina and their mixed fluids seeped out of her walls and made a mess of Tristan’s throne and his legs.

Tristan continued to hold her tight as he kissed up and down along his sister’s neck. Having passed her orgasm, Trixie simply lay in her brother’s embrace, sobbing and unable to do anything.

“You may all leave,” Tristan spoke to the others, then tilted his head back and looked to his sister. “But I think you and I have some catching up to do,” he said with a sly grin as he spun her over and mounted her in a doggy style position.

* * *

Evan’s perspective…

Rain poured down as I rushed from my truck to the house and immediately through the front door. Just as I closed the final gap between the rain and the dry insides of my house, the overhang of the roof drizzled down a constant stream of water that soaked the back of my neck and gave me an uncomfortable feeling.

I shook my head quickly and frantically, trying to shake out the dampness from the rain. My mother leaned back in her chair an looked at me with intoxicated eyes. “Take a shower already, you stink like shhhit,” she slurred and I rolled my eyes.

“I just got in, give me a second would yah?” I stated as I began to undo the laces to my boots.

“Don’t you get fuckin… lippy wit-h me,” she said and I rolled my eyes as I removed my clean dress boots. “Don’t even think you’re go… going to leave those up here, they stink like fucking shit,” she swore at me.

“They do not. These aren’t even my barn boots.” I retorted and she gave me a sour look.

“Oh, you think you know everything because… you’re a fucking smartass motherfucker, aren’t you?” she yelled in a drunken stoop. I just rolled my eyes and she became angry with my rather simple actions.

“Don’t get fuckng smart assed with me because… you’re think you’re smart huh? Well you don't know that... the government is hiding things from you.” She… I wasn’t sure of what she was asking or what she was saying. “You think because… you don’t fucking know, but I know that when you were young I was…” she trailed off and thought for a second. “Your dad was a deadbeat and that’s why you’re a fucking smart ass!” she yelled, still in a drunken slur.

“Yeah, sure, whatever. I don’t even remember my dad,” I stated truthfully. I had been so young when we moved to my grandma’s that I only had faded memories and pictures of my real father.

“OHHH! So you think that I’m just a fucking drunk and that you’re all the shit because you have a job? Oooh, big shot, getting paid minimum wage for slave labour. Your boss isn’t paying you enough, he’s fucking you over. Quit that job already and get a real one. You have the education to go to college, so go and say fuck the farm!” My mom yelled.

“NO! I’m not just gonna leave Scotty in the dust because you think I should! My boss wouldn’t fuck me over. Yeah, it’s shit pay, but I love my job and I like it!” I yelled back, defending my boss in the process.

“Oh, you think you’re the only one who works hard in this house?! I work hard too!” she stated, straying completely away from the subject of my boss. “I work just as hard as you,” she slurred and I rolled my eyes.

‘Yeah, five hours a day making cheese cake is really labour intensive,’ I thought to myself. “You know what? I’m going outside,” I told her, then slipped my boots back on and went back out into the rain.

Looking to the shop, I noticed that my uncle, grandpa, and my step-dad were drinking socially with each other. I quickly paced over to the shop and hurried inside, trying to dodge the overhang drip, but failing miserably and getting a nasty splash of rain against the back of my neck.

I looked to my three relatives who returned my stare. “She’s drunk,” I stated and my step dad rolled his eyes.

“We know. Why do you think we’re all out here?” he asked, and I rolled my eyes.

“Yeah, well, she’s in an angry drunk mood,” I replied and they all nodded and sipped from their beers in unison.

“Evan,” My Uncle Justin began, “You’re going to learn that when women drink, they get moody and do stupid things.” I nodded in agreement. There were only two woman in my life, my mom and my grandma. My grandma didn’t drink excessively, only having a sip of wine with soda pop from time to time.

“Yeah, well, it’s the reason I don’t have a girlfriend. I don’t need two crazy bitches in my life,” I stated and they all raised their beers.

“Amen to that,” my stepdad stated and they all took a swig from their beers.

* * *

Present time, Zecora’s hut…

I burst from my dreams with a loud gasp. Sweat poured down my face despite it being rather cool out. My heartbeat was speedy and thumped heavily in my chest. My breathing was loud and raspy, but I think it was my gasp that woke the other two occupants of the hut.

Derpy was sleeping on the wooden couch with a mattress that Zecora had made while I slept on the floor with a simple sheet resting above some straw. Zecora slept on her bed, which was just a simple pile of straw, stating that it reminded her of her childhood home.

Zecora paced over to me while Derpy leaned over the side of the couch, staring down at me with a worried look. My lips were dry and my throat felt parched. Zecora rested a hoof on my forehead, then scrunched her nose. “No fever… don’t worry, you’re not sick. Bad dreams perhaps?” she asked in her African accent, not rhyming at my constant requests.

“Yeah, it was nothing,” I replied, but this time Derpy spoke up.

“Really? Because I’ve never seen you looking so scared before,” she stated and I groaned.

“She is right, try and talk about it you might?” Zecora accidentally spoke in a rhyme. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to rhyme,” Zecora quickly apologized, but I waved my hand.

“No it’s okay, I understood what you meant. I just… sometimes I don’t like you rhyming because I can’t understand a thing you’re saying,” I replied. She nodded, then spoke again.

“What about your dreams?” she asked, and I shook my head.

“Nothing important, just a distant memory,” I replied truthfully before leaning my head back into the uncomfortable straw. I couldn’t wait to be back in my own bed. Hell, I’d even settle for the living room couch compared to this, but I would give thanks to Zecora for making this straw bedding, it was better than the floor.

“How are we going to beat Tristan?” I asked aloud, and Zecora spoke as she trotted back over to her bed.

“You fate is your own, but if I were you, I’d think of home,” she spoke a complex rhyme that I didn’t quite understand at first. ‘Think of home? The fuck’s that supposed to mean?’

I thought to myself. 'My mom?' and I thought about how constantly she'd be intoxicated. 'Probably not. My truck?' It was stuck in Ponyville, along with all of my guns. 'My house? Twilight’s library? Which home was she talking about? God, this topic is more frustrating than gun laws back home. Someone could literally come to my home, rob me blind, blow up my house and truck, and I wouldn’t be allowed to kill him or even lay a finger on him because it would be assault. Then God forbid if I tried to sue him in court, I wouldn’t have enough evidence. Hell, I wouldn’t even be able to blast him with rocksalt.' I thought to myself quietly.

“Fucking Tristan… God, I should’ve just killed him on the spot,” I muttered angrily.

“Why didn’t you?” Derpy asked curiously, and I shrugged.

“I dunno…” I replied, then motioned for Derpy to lean in for a secret. I whispered into her ear, though not as disturbingly as Fluttershy would. “Back when I first arrived, I considered ponies to just be animals so I’d be able to kill one without second thoughts,” I informed her and she gasped and pulled away.

“You thought that I was just an animal?” she asked sadly and I shook my head.

“No Derpy, that’s not what I’m saying. I’m saying that, back on my world, ponies weren’t super intelligent or anything, so when I showed up here, ponies were just… ponies to me, minus a select few that I really liked, which included you,” I stated truthfully. Really, when I had first arrived, I had taken a friendly liking to the mare. She was dopey, like me, so I could usually relate to her.

“But now that I’ve been here so long, I don’t think that I could just kill one in cold blood for just talking badly to me. Back when I first arrived, I probably would’ve bashed his skull in, but now… I feel almost like he’s the same species, so… it’s harder to get that fury of anger, you know?” I explained.

“You have gentle and loving feelings,” Zecora stated her thoughts, having obviously eavesdropped on our conversation.

“No, I’m tough as nails and hard as a rock, I’m just not heartless is all,” I told her sternly and the zebra shrugged.

“Believe what you wish, but do not forget that love and compassion is a better trait than hatred and anger,” she told me, though I wasn’t totally sure what she had meant. I was never always angry, never. Just a little tough on the outside.

I leaned back and thought about what to do. I couldn’t damn well just kill him in front of the whole town… could I? I wouldn’t be able to beat him in a magic duel, and I couldn’t take the risk that he was faster than me in a race.

“Fuck, I’d just like to fill him full a…” Then it struck me. “I know what we gotta do,” I said and Derpy looked at me with hopeful eyes. “First we need to see some friends of mine… but it’ll be a long walk…"

Author's Note

Hey, guys and gals. So quick recap of everything that's happened since we last chatted, MY BROTHER'S TEAM WON THE FOOTBALL CHAMPIONSHIP! I'm so proud of him, I just thought that I'd throw that out there. I also got a new gun, Boito 12ga police style, 7+1 magazine capacity, telescoping stock and pistol grips (Cause the pump has a grip on it to) It's basically a Mossberg 590 clone but it's pretty cool. Anyway other than that I've just been trying to cope with a busted back (Boss thought he was a chiropractor and cracked my back) So that's just my interesting little bits of info. Hey if any of you guys or gals ever want to chat about stuff, don't be affraid to toss out a 'Supp' cause I'm pretty sociable and don't mind talking to people.

Chapter 13

“Do you accept my challenge, or are you a coward?...”

Friday April 5th, 2014, Ponyville, third person…

It was getting late in the afternoon and the sun was getting ready to set. The sky was streaked with an orange haze and Tristan sighed contently as he walked along his orderly streets. Ponies cringed as he trotted by, fearful of what he might do to them.

As he neared the center of town, he looked to mayor’s office building. “Tristan wants this building torn down and he wants a statue of himself made in its spot!” he ordered aloud.

A moment passed by and nothing happened. He waited a moment longer before surveying the area, only to notice that nopony was around. He looked for a moment longer, but as he turned, he was rendered speechless as a lone figure stood just in front of the view of the setting sun.

A rather quiet musical theme echoed throughout the town. The figure took a step and his shadow protruded towards Tristan, who took a step back in fear. “How… you’re forbidden from town!” he hissed. The shield around the town flickered with a powerful gleam and Tristan snarled to himself, shocked as to how the man returned without his knowledge.

The figure’s duster coat flaps fluttered in the gentle breeze and the spurs on his cowboy boots clicked as he started a slow walk towards the brutal ruler of town. The dark leather cowboy hat atop the male’s head covered his facial features, giving him a dark and cold vibe.

“I… I said you’re forbidden from town… now leave at once, or else!” Tristan yelled out a threat and the figure chuckled in a deep tone before tilting the brim of his hat up, revealing his face. An unlit Cuban cigar hung from his mouth as he gave Tristan a blunt look, his eyes squinting a little and his cheeks getting a tad bit wrinkled from the way he was staring.

“Or else what?” Burdy asked in a crispy voice and Tristan lowered his head before launching an energy bolt towards the large man. Instead of blowing him away like the last time, it simply dispersed into thin air as it struck him, the momentum force puffing up a cloud of dust behind the man.

* * *

The morning before…

“Zecora… do you still have some of that magic negating goo stuff? The stuff you put on Chrysalis to stop her from using magic?” Evan asked and Zecora left for a moment before returning with a jar of goo.

“Would this stop magic from affecting me?” he asked and Zecora thought for a moment before shrugging.

“I had never thought about using it for that purpose, but I suppose that if you covered yourself in the goo… it might stop you from being affected by spells like mind control and such. This goo simply disconnects magic from a user, but I suppose it would disconnect you from magic so… maybe,” Zecora replied; it was a good enough answer for him.

Derpy stepped up beside Evan and gave him a wondering look which he returned with a subtle gaze. He smiled briefly before ruffling her mane making her return his smile. “Don’t worry Derpy, we’ll save the town,” Evan assured her.

* * *

Present time…

Evan stopped approaching the now speechless stallion and mouthed the cigar around his lips. The taste of fine tobacco stung his dry lips and made him give a distasteful look before he spat some saliva to the ground. The musical tune continued in the background as he removed the cigar and placed it in a cigar container, then put the container in one of the coat’s pockets.

“Leave this town at once!” Tristan scowled out an order, but Burdy remained silent. “HEY! DID YOU HEAR ME OR ARE YOU DEAF!?” Tristan screamed, but instead of answering immediately, the brutish man shot him a cold glare that made the stallion’s stomach twist.

A gust of wind blew between the duo along with a cloud of sandy dust, all the while a tumbleweed bounced across the ground behind Burdy. His duster coat flapped with the direction of the wind. “I challenge you,” Burdy said in a deep tone.

* * *

The morning before…

After Zecora had told Evan the story of how Twilight had defeated Trixie, the man set out on his departure and waved a goodbye to Zecora as he and Derpy started walking towards their destination. “So how are you gonna get rid of him? Are you going to kill him?” Derpy asked.

“I’m gonna taunt his pride,” the big man replied, not answering her question. Derpy continued to follow him as they threshed through the forest. Evan’s work boots helped him keep a solid grip on the soft, mushy ground.

He whispered constant regrets about not having his battle jacket, but reconciled with the fact that he still had his cargo pants. Taking hold of the Christian cross around his neck, he began to mutter prayers to Jesus, asking for forgiveness.

* * *

Present time…

“Do you accept, or are you a coward?” the man asked, and all Tristan could sputter out were a few grunts of anger before attempting to blast him away again. To the same effect as before, the blast simply dissipated once it struck him, leaving no physical damage.

Evan shuffled in a bit of discomfort as the gooey gel squelched in private areas. The goo on his back felt awful while in contact with his undershirt. ‘I wish there was a more comfortable way to do this,’ he thought to himself.

“Ugh! What have you done!” the stallion roared and Burdy waved his silver Christian cross about freely.

“I found a way to beat your magic,” he replied and Tristan spat.

“HA! I won’t fall for the same trick that my sister did!” he laughed and Burdy shrugged before looking around.

“Tell you what. I’d wager I could dust you. With nopony around, you don’t have to worry about little secrets. All you gotta worry ‘bout is what ah’m doin’,” he offered and Tristan once again spat at him. “I win and my banishment is lifted, you win and I’m exiled from Equestria, never to return. I think that you could have Celestia herself remove me,” he offered and the stallion thought about it.

“How do I know you won’t just return like you have?” he questioned Burdy and the man shrugged.

“The royal guard will stop me from re-entering Equestria. So how bout it? Do you accept, or are you a coward?” the man asked and Tristan gritted his teeth.

* * *

The morning before…

As Derpy and Burdy traversed through the empty deserts, the tall man fiddled with his silver cross and his female companion took notice. “Are you Christian?” Derpy asked and he gave her a curious look.

“I didn’t think there was Christianity in this world, seeing as how there are living goddesses,” Burdy replied back and Derpy nodded.

“Yup! Ponies say that if you’re good and believe in God, that you’ll be allowed into heaven, but if you’re bad and don’t believe that you’ll go to… a bad place,” she informed him, obviously not wanting to say: Hell.

“Huh… guess our worlds have more in common than I first thought,” he mused, then continued to fumble with the cross. She gave him a tap on the shoulder, now hovering at his face level.

“So are you a Christian?” she asked, and Burdy merely gave a ‘so-so’ action with his right hand.

“Kind of. I believe in God, but not entirely of all the bible’s stories. Some seem a little farfetched for me,” he replied and she stopped, still hovering in the air to stay eye level with him.

“Which ones?” she asked and he thought briefly.

“Well, the first one would be of Adam and Eve. I think it says somewhere in the bible that incest is wrong, but if they were the first people… ponies on earth, or in Equestria, wouldn’t the generation afterwards just consist of a lot of incest?” Burdy asked and Derpy simply thought to herself.

“And the one about Noah’s Ark and how he thought ahead and got two of every animal, a male and a female. What if one of the animals died of sickness or something? If he really thought ahead shouldn’t he have thought about animals dying?” Burdy stated another point. He sighed then shrugged, “Like I said, I believe in God and everything, it’s just that some of the stories are a little outfield so to speak.”

“Well, you just have to have faith!” Derpy told him in an upbeat tone and Evan chuckled as he nodded in response, still fiddling with the cross necklace.

“Yeah… well, I guess it’s almost time to put our own faith to the test.”

* * *

Present time…

“What if I refuse?!” Tristan boomed and Burdy shrugged in an effortless way.

“Then you’re a coward and I’ll roam freely around town, coming and going as I please,” he replied and Tristan scowled angrily.

“You shall do no such thing! You’ll still be forbidden from town!” Evan simply chuckled from Tristan's anger.

“Well… by my count, there’ll be nothing you can do to stop me. If you tried to get Celestia to stop me, she’d probably throw you in prison once she realizes what you’ve done,” Evan stated, then wondered just why exactly nopony had noticed that Ponyville had been captured by an insane unicorn stallion.

While the quiet tune continued to play in the background, the duo continued to stare each other down, their glares like ice. Another tuff of wind gusted by and fluttered Burdy’s duster coat.

Ponies from the town looked out to the standoff from the safety of their homes or some sort of safe place. A trashcan lid opened slightly and a puff of frazzly pink mane peeped out while Pinkie Pie stole a glance at the duo on Mane Street.

Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash hid in the tree nearby. Fluttershy's teeth chattered in fear of what might happen, though Dash had a popcorn bucket filled with buttery popcorn as she watched in absolute attention.

Rarity peered through her telescope while sitting in the safety of her home, lightly chewing on the edge of her hoof in anticipation of what might happen.

Twilight watched from behind a building corner, taking a glance every so often to see what had happened since the last time she had looked, fearful for the life of her secret crush.

After what felt like eternity, Tristan spoke, “What’s the challenge?”

* * *

Midday, the day before…

In the nearby distance was an old rundown garage, where two brothers lay trying to fix their train contraption, dressed in blue mechanic uniforms. “And I tell you brother, perhaps we should give this life up and do something else,” Flim offered and Flam sighed.

“How? We don’t know how to do anything else. I mean, I know how to be a doctor, but where would I start?” Flam asked and his brother sighed.

“Perhaps we could sell the garage and train, then move to Mareami,” Flim offered and Flam sighed as he daydreamed about the warm beaches of Mareami.

“That would be the Equestrian dream brother, but let’s face it, the garage wouldn’t sell well and the train is still in disrepair. The only money we really have is the money that we procured from that good chap Burdy,” Flam expressed his discouraging thoughts before another voice chimed in.

“More like scammed me out of my money. If you could do that to other ponies then you might just make it in the world,” Evan told the two, who quickly slid out from under the train, covered in smut and black grease.

They were speechless and simply looked at him in disbelief. “Your truck didn’t break down on you, did it?!” They both gasped and Evan shook his head in reply. “So then… why are you here?” They asked in a nervous unison.

* * *

Present time…

Evan left his hands at his sides while he stared Tristan down. Tristan gulped, trying to hide the fear he had of the man. Something about him was different from before. “Well…” Tristan trailed off, waiting for the challenge. “WELL, WHAT’S CHALLENGE!?” he screamed out and Evan smirked.

“A duel,” he replied and Tristan laughed.

“A duel?” he replied, then laughed harder. “You’re not serious are you? HA! You’re serious!” Tristan howled in laughter. “If you think you can beat Tristan in a duel, then you’re stupider than he thought. You don’t even have a horn,” Tristan teased Evan, who simply continued to stare at him with an unimpressed look.

“Not that kind of duel…”

* * *

The day before, high noon…

“Listen, I know I said I’d never let you guys produce firearms, but… I need something made up,” Evan told the brothers who nodded. The group travelled into the construction area and Evan pulled out some stainless steel piping and some other pieces of vital material.

“I need a favour,” Evan said and the brothers thought.

“What do we get in return?” Flim asked and Evan sighed.

“That’s just it. I don’t have anything to give you,” Evan replied and Flim and Flam looked to each other, then back to the man.

“So… how are you supposed to repay us?” Flam asked curiously and Evan gave them a look that he had never given them before. It was a pleading look.

“Guys… listen. I know that you’re only in it for profit and you don’t really care about the mushy stuff, but… I need this. Ponyville is in danger,” Evan told them and wide smiles went across their faces.

“Excellent! We can just take Sweet Apple Acres and nopony will be able to stop us!” the brothers exclaimed.

“GUYS!” Evan boomed and the two stood in attention. “Nopony is taking anything,” he told them and they looked at him curiously.

“Well… you’re asking for ‘our’ supplies for free… isn’t that like taking?” Flim asked and Evan sighed.

Derpy set an angry hoof down on the table. “Hey! He’s trying to save Ponyville and he needs your help. What he’s saying is that he needs you to have his back and be his friends, cause that’s what friends are for. They stand by each other and help one another. Because friendship is magic!” Derpy stated and Burdy nodded.

“Yeah, what she said, except… not the magic part.” Derpy shot him a look. “I just say that friendship is invaluable.” And Derpy rolled her criss-crossed eyes, which resulted in them going all wonky and looking every which way.

“Isn’t that the same thing?” Derpy asked and the other three just sighed as Flim set his fore-hooves on the table.

“Okay… what do you need?”

* * *

Present time…

Evan pulled aside his right duster flap, revealing a holstered sawed-off shotgun. There were twin barrels, each with an exposed hammer. The barrel was extremely short and there was no stock, only a handgrip designed specifically for him. On the downside, there was only one trigger, meaning it was a two for one special unless the user only pulled back one hammer at a time.

Tristan laughed at the display. “Ha! You think that you can kill Tristan? You couldn’t even kill him before, so what makes you think you’ll do it this time?”

Evan wiggled his fingers in anticipation and Tristan laughed, then looked to the trashcan. “You, pink whore, go get the shooty thing that this… thing, had from before,” Tristan ordered. Evan snarled from the way Tristan addressed his friends, clenching his hands in anger.

Pinkie zoomed off and quickly returned with Evan’s Norinco shotgun. “Indeed… so I suppose you wish to do a draw?” Evan nodded. The stallion levitated the shotgun down to his side, but kept it in his magical grasp. “Well, at first I thought I’d never be rid of you, but if you’re this willing to die, then I won’t hold you from your fate,” Tristan sneered.

* * *

The day before, late evening…

As the evening set, the big man nodded to the two brothers as he set the luggage bags on his back. “Thank you… you guys don’t know how much this means to Ponyville,” Burdy told them, but they still had sour looks on their faces. Evan nudged Flim’s shoulder, “Hey, cheer up, cause if you ever need my help, I’ll be willing to lend a helping hand.”

They rolled their eyes then nodded, returning to their previous task. Derpy stood beside Evan with a smile, but her smile was not returned. “Derpy, you can’t come with me.” Derpy’s mouth went agape to this information, almost like a foal who was told she couldn’t have the candy.

“What!? Why not!?” she asked in a shocked tone and the man set his hand on her shoulder.

“Because I love you too much. As much as I know you want to help save Ponyville, I know that Tristan will use you to his advantage. I couldn’t bear the thought of you getting hurt again because of me,” he told her and she got a pouty face as tears came to her eyes.

“But I thought we could do this together,” Derpy inquired and Evan just sighed as he brought her into a tight hug.

“Please Derpy, for me… stay here,” Evan reasoned with her and Derpy sniffled a little. “I’m sorry Derpy, but… I can’t let you get hurt on my behalf,” Evan told her and she nodded, slowly departing from his hug.

“Be safe,” she said and he nodded. “Tail twist swear?” she asked and he nodded once again. They spun around and bumped flanks before turning to face each other once more.

“I’ll be safe Derpy, as much as I can with what’s about to happen.” Derpy sniffled and wiped the tears from her eyes.

* * *

Present time…

Tristan mouthed his tongue around and gulped. He had never done anything like this before, but his magic was unrivalled in his mind, so he figured he’d easily be faster than the human.

“I’m curious as to why? Why do you wish to die like this? In front of the whole town, kind of tragic, don’t you think?” Tristan asked and Burdy shook his head.

“I don’t plan on dying, not by your hooves,” he informed him, only making Tristan laugh boastfully.

“Well than, your plans will end in utter failure!” he sneered before looking to his magic barrier. “Tell me, I know that you’ve somehow managed to negate my magic, but how did you get in undetected? I would’ve noticed a rupture in my shield when you entered,” Tristan asked and Evan smirked.

“Well, I guess I’ll enlighten you…”

* * *

One hour ago, Evan’s perspective…

It had taken quite a while to get to town, and the luggage didn’t help. I stood before the sewage tank that was just outside Ponyville. I knew this was going to be shitty, quite literally, but it was the only way I was going to do this.

I opened the luggage backpack and quickly undressed. Now in the nude, I slipped into the air tight diver suit that had been constructed by Flim and Flam, I just hopped that they did a better job with this suit than the radio.

With the suit on, I took a few breaths of pure oxygen that came directly from the tank. It tasted weird and different than regular air, but I would be willing to bet this tasted better than what the insides of that tank tasted like.

I strapped on an air tight container to my hip, then crawled up the sewage tank ladder. With the swimming paddles, climbing a ladder was extremely difficult and slow.

Finally getting to the top, I popped the top hatch on the tank. The hatch was probably the spot where the sewage was sucked from, judging by the seals around the edge of the opening. Even with the air tight suit, I could almost smell the manure water that curdled inside.

“Pray to goddess that there aren’t turbines in here,” I muttered then hopped in. I was pretty sure there wouldn’t be any turbine blades or anything along those lines since there were no motors outside to run anything. Add the fact that the shit water sat still, it’d be a good bet to believe that this was probably just a holding tank.

I felt turds slim against my suit and I cringed from the absolute disgusting feel of the place. As I flicked on the headset light, I began making my way towards the main pipeline, which was large enough for me to fit through with room to spare.

The water surrounding me was uncomfortably warm and I constantly cringed and squirmed while I continued to swim through the sewage line. I could only imagine if Derpy was with me, she probably would be a tad bit grossed out by this.

I snickered as I imagined Rarity here. She’d probably be sickened by the mere thought of sewage.

I kept swimming for the next twenty minutes, until the water started to shallow out and I entered the main sewage lines of the entire town. Eventually it was shallow enough for me to trudge through the sewers, though I kept my diving suit on and the waist tank sealed.

Murky sewage still dangled from my suit, some falling off here and there, but I was willing to bet that it didn’t smell pleasant.

As I turned a corner in the sewers, I spotted a ladder to the surface and waddled over. Looking up, I saw a manhole cover and, as quickly as I could, I scurried up the ladder.

As I reached the manhole plate, I lifted up on one of the sides, then peered out to the streets. There were a few ponies here and there, but the one I was looking for wasn’t nearby. I exited the sewers and began to race along.

I knew that Tristan would’ve most likely kept the facilities running, so that meant that he’d have left the sewage running, meaning I could get in that way, and my plan had paid off.

I raced through the streets, only tripping once because of the flippers. Ponies constantly would look to me, and the ones who were within smelling distance constantly plugged their noses in a disgusted fashion. I skidded around a corner and stopped at the library. Looking around and making sure nopony was looking, I opened the sealed container and dumped the contents on the ground, which consisted of the magic gel stuff, two custom shotgun shells, a custom holster belt, and the sawn-off shotgun itself.

Tossing the container away, I quickly stripped down, grabbed my items, then rushed inside for a shower. I had gotten some shit on my hands and, despite the suit, I reeked of crap.

I went into the washroom and crammed myself into the shower, which was meant more for ponies, not a big man. Regardless of size, the hot water felt terrific against my bare skin. I contemplated taking a longer shower, but I knew that time wouldn’t allow for such leisurely activities.

After quickly soaping myself down and rinsing, I turned off the shower and dried myself off. A thought lingered in my mind as I ruffled my hair with the towel. ‘How exactly would I tempt his ego?’

Another thought crossed my mind and I nodded. Walking to the basement, I thought to myself about what I should play in the background.

Entering my room, or what used to be an unoccupied basement, I opened the gel jar and lathered myself down with it. It was gross and gooey, making me really wish there was another, more plausible way of doing this. I grabbed the set of western wear that Rarity had reconstructed for me. The whole suit felt like it fit me perfectly. Not too loose or too tight, just a nice snug fit, and the customized duster coat was comfortable atop of the vest and white undershirt. I wiggled a little as the goo squelched between my body and the clothes I was now wearing.

Snapping on the belt and holding the double barreled shotgun in my right, I spun the shotgun with my right index finger, then with a flick of my wrist, swung it perfectly into the custom holster. “Just like the movies,” I muttered.

Just as I went to leave, Lassie came racing over, pawing at my leg and whining. “I know Lassie, I know,” I cooed in a deep tone. She continued to paw at my leg, whimpering all the while. I tilted my head and she raced over to her dog bed, or as I called it: Her dog domain.

I quickly paced over and noticed her dog dish to be empty. “Aww, you’re hungry, huh?” I asked in a sympathetic voice. She let out a playful whine and yipped. Quickly grabbing the dog food, which I noticed had many bite marks in it, I filled her dish and gave her a pat on the head.

“I’m gonna make this all better,” I stated as I pulled the shotgun back out from the holster. I hit the hitch release on the break barrel shotgun and the shortened barrels popped open. Both shells slide in with a SHHOOOMP and as I flicked my wrist, the gun clicked shut.

The belt felt pretty snug on my wait and didn’t move all that much when I fit the shotgun into it. I performed a quick draw, practicing speed and accuracy. Disappointed with my speed, I tried again, and again and again…

I couldn’t get it just right. I took a deep breath and relaxed from my frustrated state. “Easy… just like pointing your finger…” I took a deep breath and, in a single fluid motion, the gun was out of the holster in my right hand, pointed downrange, my left hand just behind my right wrist, the hammers already cocked back.

“Once more…” I told myself. I de-cocked the hammers and spread my stance. My right foot was just a few inches further back than my left. My left hand hovered just in front of my body, at waist level. My right clenched and unclenched, itching for the moment to draw.

I took a deep wisp of breath then whistled it out. “Like pointing my finger… just an extension of my body…” I told myself. I hadn’t tested the trigger pull weight, but I didn’t bother, hopefully it wasn’t broken.

In less than half a second, my right hand shot down to the grip and very fluently pulled the shotgun out from the holster. At the same time, my left brushed along the top of the barrels and eventually against the hammers, cocking them back.

I could do to be faster, but with the way things were, I didn’t have time to practice. “Lassie?” I asked and the puppy looked to me. “Think I’m fast enough?” I asked and she piped out a happy bark.

“Well… let’s just hope you’re right,” I stated then picked up one of my custom CDs and made my way upstairs and to the front doors.

Peering both ways, I made my way for the pony who I was looking for which, ironically, wasn’t Tristan. As I was about to round another corner, I spotted Tristan coming my way. “Shit!” I hissed quietly and looked behind me, only to see that I wouldn’t have enough time to rush around to the other corner of the building.

Looking down, I noticed a large cardboard box. “Well… it has worked before,” I mused then lifted the box, set it on top of myself, and hunched down. My knees burned in report of my action and my back fared no better.

Lucky enough, Tristan walked right past without noticing a single thing out of the ordinary. “Man… thank you Snake,” I whispered my thanks with a deep sigh, then snuck away, the box still atop of me, using the handle holes to see my way.

Somehow, nopony even took notice of me, or the moving cardboard box, as I traversed through the town. I travelled down the streets, around corners of buildings, even down alleyways, until finally, I arrived at Sugarcube Corner. As I entered, I tossed the box off and Pinkie gasped, stunned that I was here. “Evan!...” she squealed, but I motioned for her to keep quiet. She quickly zipped her lips and I rushed over to the counter, the CD already in my hands.

“I’m still exiled from town. Can you do me a favour?” I asked and she nodded. “Can you play this on some sort of speaker so that it faintly echoes in the town?” I asked and she nodded again. I handed her the disk, she nodded once more and I gave her frizzly mane a tussle.

“Okay, thanks,” I thanked her, gave her a nod, then rushed out, leaving my stealth cardboard box behind.

I looked side to side, now looking for the blue stallion who hurt my friends. “Okay you sonofabitch… where are you?” I asked to myself, then went to the left, carefully cutting corners to make sure he didn’t spot me first.

The jelly goo squished and squelched in my clothes, making me cringe in disgust. Other than the smell, this was almost on par with the sewers.

Taking another corner, I spotted Tristan. Looking back to see the sun setting, I nodded to myself then started a slow walk forwards. The duster coat flaps tuffed about in the gentle breeze.

I stopped a few dozen yards away from him and waited. Ever so gradually, he turned to face me.

* * *

Present time…

“I guess you know what happened after that,” I told him and he smiled.

“Yes, and now the only thing left is the ending, which I assure you, I already know how it ends,” he told me, and I smiled smugly.

“Oooh… damn, that must be painful to know your own demise,” I taunted him and he smiled back, equally as smug.

“Yes, well, not as mentally painful as knowing that you can’t help your friends… like that little grey pegasus. Tell me, did she live? I tried more so to cripple her rather than kill her,” he taunted me, somehow knowing where to pry to get me steamed. I grunted out an angry huff and he snickered, now getting boastful.

“Let’s have a little competition, shall we?” he offered and I snarled. “This alicorn amulet nourishes me with power, but I’m willing to wager that I can beat you without it, but only if you toss away yours as well,” he stated. I slid the Christian cross necklace off and tossed it aside.

Tilting his head forwards, he slid off the alicorn amulet and his eyes flashed before he too tossed his aside. “See? I am completely out of its power, all on my own. Now we can see who is truly better!” he boasted loudly.

The Norinco’s pump racked, loading a fresh shell into the chamber. “Shall we begin?” he asked and I nodded. Time nearly slowed to a stop as I saw his gun start to rise. In an instant my sawn off shotgun was up.

The muzzle blast was horrendous as both barrels went off at once. The recoil was tremendous and the muzzle flash was equally as frightening, probably more so for Tristan. He was lifted off his hooves, his magical aura disappearing almost instantly around my old shotgun.

Blood splayed out from his chest as he was propelled backwards. Landing over ten feet back with a THUMP, I heard him gag painfully. I waited for a moment as smoke poured out from the twin barrels of my shotgun. Slowly bringing the barrels closer to my face, I blew away the smoke, spun the shotgun on my right index finger, and then holstered it… just like the movies.

I began walking towards Tristan and as I passed my Chinese shotgun, I hefted it up and racked the slide, removing the shell from the chamber. Continuing along, I passed his alicorn amulet and slammed the stock of the shotgun into it, crushing it into the pavement and shattering it apart.

Lifting the gun back up, the shattered remains of the amulet turned to dust and blew away in the breeze. “Cheap Chinese shit,” I muttered my opinion about the amulet, then racked open the receiver on my Chinese shotgun and loaded the old shell back into the chamber. An agonizingly painful scream echoed in the town as Tristan withered on the ground, gaining my attention.

The musical tune in the background slowly came to a stop. I paced over top of Tristan who had a bit of blood oozing from his nose, probably from the shot, or hitting the ground.

“That’s rocksalt. It’s a painful bitch, isn't it?!” I hissed before pressing down on his chest a little with my right boot. He cringed in pain then screamed loudly. A few of the salt chunks had dug into his skin and, even without me pressing down, it was probably a tremendous pain he was feeling. My boot pressing down on his chest pushed the rocksalt chunks deeper into his wounds, making him scream louder.

“DASH! Start a timer!” I yelled out and Dash immediately brought out a stopwatch. I looked back to the pitiful pony beneath me. “Open wide bitch!” I hissed while pressing the shotgun barrel into his face. He gagged, then began to cry in a mixture of pain and petrified fear.

“Please… please don’t kill me! Please… PLEASE!” he sobbed and I looked back to Dash.

“TIME!?” I asked and Dash hit the stop button.

“Uhh… Ten seconds flat,” Dash informed me and I nodded before pressing the shotgun barrel against his head with brutal force.

“Now, if you ever come back, and I mean EVER! I will gut you in less than ten seconds flat… no, I’LL FUCKING RIP OUT YOUR EYES, SHOVE EM UP YOUR ASS, THEN YOU CAN SEE ME RIP OUT YOUR GUTS FROM THE INSIDE! I’LL FUCKING EAT YOUR HEART OUT AND MAKE BALLOONS OUT OF YOUR LUNGS . ARRRRRG!” I let out a roar of anger, taking my foot off his chest so that he could leave. He painfully got up and scampered off into the distance, leaving a plume of dust behind him.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! SHOOT HIM!” Dash screamed and I gave a look of shock to the cyan pegasus. Never before had I heard a civil pony ask me to kill another pony.

“Oh, but Dashie… don’t you think that’s a little harsh. Maybe we could…” Fluttershy began, but Dash hushed her.

“SHOOT HIM!” she screamed again. I wasn’t about to question the mare, and in the end, if Twilight got mad at me for killing, I could always tell her that I gave into peer pressure.

I quickly brought up my Chinese made shotgun, lined up a shot, and squeezed the trigger.

CLICK!

“UGH!” I groaned in a deep tone. I waited a brief moment before racking the slide. The shell ejected, but just as it was falling down, the shell went off. Before I could even blink, I felt something painful skinned across the top right side of my forehead. I was knocked to the ground as my head was whipped back, knocking me off balance and crashing painfully to the ground.

‘Smooth one Burdy, hangfire,’ my conscience ridiculed me. ‘You’re lucky that thing didn’t go off like a hand grenade or you’d be dead!’ he continued to bash me. I brought my hand up to my now bleeding forehead. Blood seeped between my fingers as my vision blurred.

The cut wasn’t necessarily deep, but it started just above my eyebrow, and ended just before my hairline. I brought my left arm over to the right side of my body and rolled over, but my equilibrium would have no part of it. It felt like I was spinning a hundred miles an hour. Very slowly, I stood to my feet, shaking a little to stay balanced as best I could. “Chinese… shit,” I muttered as my balance became wonky and my vision blurred even worse.

“Oh no! He’s not getting away, not after what he did!” Dash yelled and prepared to fly after him.

Just as she went to fly after him, the shield around the town dissipated. Dash was like a streak of light as she blazed towards Tristan. “God… she’s angrier than I am,” I stated bluntly, still a bit wobbly. Suddenly, a voice yelled out from the skies.

“I got your back Evan… WOAH!” Derpy must’ve hit turbulence or something because she spiraled out of control and collided with Rainbow Dash, smashing them both into the ground with brutal force.

I gasped and staggered over to the duo while Tristan made his escape. “UGH DERRRRPY!” Dash yelled as she squirmed out from under the grey pegasus mare, but as she went to continue her pursuit of Tristan, her wing spasmed, obviously busted pretty bad.

Derpy rubbed her head attentively and I looked to them both. “Are you mares alright?” I asked and Dash shot me an angry look.

“Don’t just stand there, shoot him!” she screamed. I looked towards Tristan, who was now far in the distance, far beyond the range of my shotgun.

“I can’t. He’s out of my shotgun’s range,” I replied, and Dash looked to Fluttershy.

“Chase him down!” Dash screamed and Fluttershy darted forwards with a look of determination on her face.

I blinked in a rather unimpressed way as she slowly buzzed past us, going about ten miles an hour. Dash scowled angrily and I looked to her with curiosity. “Okay, I know he had you guys… erm, mares, as slaves, but really, I should be the angry one. He nearly killed me and Derpy,” I stated and Dash’s body tensed up in anger, growling to herself.

Blood dripped down into my eye and made me flinch briefly as I rubbed it away. It was bleeding pretty good, and I now had a thumping headache.

“He!... HE!... HE RAPED TRIXIE!” Dash screamed at me. Her scream was like a powerful gust of wind that blew against my face with tremendous force. My face was relieved as she stopped yelling and I managed to open my eyes.

Looking back to a very depressed looking Trixie, I scratched the left, uninjured side of my forehead. “Trixie?… like… that Trixie?” I asked and she nodded. “Like… that Trixie right there?”

“Yes,” Dash muttered angrily, just as Fluttershy returned.

“Oh Dashie, I’m terribly sorry but… Tristan escaped. I just couldn’t catch him,” Fluttershy apologized in her timid tone. Dash rolled her eyes in an irritated way, probably already knowing beforehand that he was going to get away with Fluttershy pursuing him.

“YES THAT TRIXIE! AS IN HIS OWN SISTER!” Dash screamed at me and I flinched, then looked back to Trixie, who was now in tears.

Taking a moment for it to register in my head, I cringed a bit at the thought of the two siblings… and at the thought of Tristan raping her. “Eww… like… he raped, raped her?” I asked and Dash let out a groan.

“Yes. Tristan raped Trixie. He forcefully put his penis inside her vagina against her will!” Dash explained it so bluntly that I didn’t need to register anything.

“Eww… that’s gross… and wrong… FUCK, HE’S STILL ALIVE!” I yelled as I realized that, in my process of getting unbanned from town, and the shell hangfire, he had managed to escape.

Dash nodded with wide eyes. “Yeah, hence why I was so angry,” she said, obviously scorned at me. She then turned her attention to Derpy who had kind of thwarted her plans. “WHAT WERE YOU DOING DERPY!? I ALMOST HAD HIM!” Dash screamed at the grey and cross eyed pegasus, who only flinched in fear.

“HEY!” I boomed, and this time Dash flinched. “Don’t yell at Derpy. She was only…” I trailed off as I realized that she had come to town, even though I had specifically told her not to. “What were you doing?” I asked in a calm and curiously voice. Derpy gulped and let out a nervous laugh as she scratched the back of her head.

“Well… I heard a loud boom from your thingy and then you fell over, so I thought you were hurt really badly and I was going to come to your rescue,” Derpy replied and I sighed, happy that she was trying to help me. In truth, I did get hurt, so she was in the right mindset.

We all let out sighs just as the others came over. “Oh dear… this is not good. I’ll inform Celestia immediately,” Twilight informed everypony, then looked to my forehead. “Oh my gosh! Evan! You need to go to a hospital!” She became frantic, but I brushed away her worries.

“Don’t worry. It’s not bad,” I replied and tried to wipe away more of the oozing blood, which just seemed to keep coming. I let out a sigh, then looked to Dash, whose wing was still messed up. “Alright, I’ll go to the hospital with Dash and… you gals can do your thing… whatever it is,” I stated in an exhausted voice.

As everything settled, we all started to depart and Twilight nudged me. “I know I yelled at you the other day for doing what you did with Trixie, but Tristan… I’ve never met a pony so cruel. Even Sombra wasn’t that sadistic,” she told me. Derpy trotted over and gave me a weak smile.

“I’m sorry for what happened. I didn’t know, I just…” I cut her off by bringing my index finger to her lips.

“It’s okay. I think we’re all feeling pretty bad. I can just feel it in the air,” I told her in a very depressed tone. Truthfully so, it felt like justice wasn’t done. Like none of us had done our part to stop it. I noticed Trixie was still in tears.

“Listen, uhh… I’m gonna… go and uhh...” I trailed off and walked over to Trixie, sitting down beside her and sighing. “I’m sorry about what happened. If I had’ve known…” I trailed off, my stare turning to the horizon, the sun just setting.

“I have nowhere to go. Anywhere I go he’ll find me… and…” she sobbed. I wrapped my right arm around her and gave her a comforting hug.

“Stay here… I’ll protect you,” I told her, and she looked to me with haunted and saddened eyes.

“I can’t… I’ve made a fool of myself in this town so many times,” Trixie sobbed and I hugged her a little tighter.

“I’ll make sure they let you stay. And I’ll make sure that if Tristan ever comes back, even gets close to the town, I’ll put him six feet under,” I told her and she looked to me with teary eyes.

“But… but… you… I tried to make a fool of you,” she cried and I shook my head.

“Doesn’t matter. What he did to you was wrong and…” I trailed off and looked to the sunset with a gulp. “I fucked up big Trixie. I was always the most badass, most rock hard, most… I was all that. Big, strong, powerful, brutal towards anything that showed me lip, and now...? Now I’m just… I’m starting to get soft. I can’t bring myself to just get angry on the spot. I need something to help me get angry,” I stated in self-pity.

She hugged me back. “Maybe it’s not good to always be angry… and thank you, thank you so much. Nopony has ever done something like this for me before,” she cried and I shrugged.

“On one condition. I need you to do something for me,” she gasped and pulled back from the hug in a shock of horror.

“I… I didn’t think you’d want me to… after what I’ve been through,” she gasped in absolute fear. I nodded and she stayed in a look of shock.

“Listen, I know that it’s just how you are and everything, but… just try to relax on the whole boasting thing. And maybe don’t talk down to ponies either. That’d be nice,” I told her and she paused for a moment in thought.

“Wait… you only want me to… be nice to ponies?” she asked and I nodded. ‘Isn’t that how ponies are supposed to act towards one another?’ I thought before she interrupted my internal conversation. “Oh… I thought you meant something else,” she let out a sigh of relief while I raised an eyebrow. What on earth could she possibly think I wanted her to do for me? Maybe fix my bleeding head so I wouldn’t have to go to the doctor.

With everypony now dispersing, I went to get up, but Trixie held me down. With the amount I was bleeding, I was feeling a little tipsy. “Please, don’t leave me,” she wept and I rolled my eyes.

“Listen, uhh… I’m bleeding… a lot. I think I might need a doctor,” I informed her and she quickly stood up, got a prideful look on her face, and offered me her hoof.

“Please allow THE GREAT AND HELPFUL TRIXIE to escort you to the hospital!” she offered in an upbeat tone.

“Alright,” I replied as I let her help me up. For a quick second, I thought she had completely gotten over it somehow, then I quickly realized that she was nestled close to my side, obviously not wanting to be alone.

* * *

Ponyville, Sunday, April 7th, 2014…

I gasped as shot up out of bed, sweat beading down my face while my heart raced wildly. Ever so slowly I slowed my breathing, thankful it was just another dream. It was a constantly occurring dream, ever since the whole Tristan incident.

I leaned back down and rubbed my forehead attentively. Luckily for me, the healing potion worked wonders, unfortunately I would still have to endure the side effects of that tetanus crap they always gave me.

Thinking to myself, I wondered if it was really necessary to give me that many tetanus shots. I mean, shouldn’t one be enough for a while?

I’d been having this particular dream recently, a dream that Tristan had slowly killed all my friends, all the while I was paralyzed, just looking down upon my shotgun, unable to stop him. Much like I had done the day he had flung me out of town and nearly killed Derpy. It would just replay, again, and again, and again, until I finally woke up.

The whole incident was just getting to me in an uncontrollable way. I had been so close and I just screwed up. I let out a deep growl as I clenched my fists. If I had just shot him right then and there… this would’ve all turned out fine.

I began talking to myself in my head. ‘The fact that the first time I couldn’t bring myself to end him… am I becoming a failure? I mean, it was only when Dash yelled for me to shoot him that I was going to shoot him. Before, I was just going to let him run free. That’s not who I am… is it? I’m supposed to be the one who can handle the dark stuff… am I getting… soft?’ I thought more and more to myself. I hadn’t known beforehand that Tristan had raped Trixie… but he still had messed Derpy up really bad. I should’ve been in an absolute uproar.

Grabbing a piece of paper and pencil from the nightstand, I started constructing a letter to Twilight.

‘Dear Princess’

I stopped writing to think of a pun, but stopped myself as I realized that I should start to be serious. This wasn’t something to joke about. I had fucked up real badly. Nopony in town was quite the same. I continued to write a proper letter

‘Dear Princess Twilight Sparkle,
It wasn’t today, but a few days ago. I used to think I was the strongest, the best, someone to look up to. But instead I’m a failure. I messed up real bad when I should’ve been at my best. I feel like everything is my fault and I don’t know what to do. Sometimes friendship can feel as if it’s being broken apart because of something you do, something I did. I don’t know what to think about this and hopefully things work themselves out.

Your faithful student,
Burdy.’

Author's Note

Yeah I know, you all wanted to see Tristan's head smashed in, but his death (As I plan it) is meant to be more symbolic, rather than just having Burdy smash his skull on the streets of Ponyville so, I apologize for not having him die in this chapter.

Chapter 14

Contains explicit scenes

And uhh... a weird fetish scene that, it's weird and that's all I'll say

‘Reconcile I suppose…’

Sunday, April 7th, 2014…

It was getting to about 8 AM and things were just… terrible. I was still feeling shitty about the whole Tristan thing and… I had a boner and those insane urges again. The doctors had given me a medical potion, but of course I had to get a tetanus.

I contemplated lifting weights, but I just… I was just feeling so miserable that I couldn't. So now I was lying on my back, facing the ceiling, just waiting for something to happen.

As I lay there, Twilight trotted over to my bedside. “How are you feeling?” she asked and I shrugged.

“I’m not exactly decent. You mind knocking next time?” I snickered a crude joke while she blushed, noticing the protrusion in my boxers that was pointing straight up. “I just feel… well… you know?” I asked rhetorically, figuring she probably felt the same way.

“Horny?” she replied and I gave her a shocked look.

“NO! I mean, yes, but…” I thought for a moment while I scratched my head. “I just… I feel so bad about what happened,” I explained, and Twilight rested a hoof on my shoulder.

“I know what Tristan did was wrong, but would killing him truly make you feel better?” she asked and I thought to myself. It kind of would… maybe. I wouldn’t know until I tried. “Maybe you should talk to the others. Maybe they feel the same way you do,” she offered.

“Okay, how do you feel?” I asked and she was shocked by my asking.

“Oh… well…” She thought to herself. “Like I said, I’ve never met somepony so… evil, before. What he did was inexcusable but… I don’t know if killing him off would've been the best answer,” she replied, and I tossed the answer around inside my head.

“So where does that leave us?” I asked and she too tossed the thought around.

“To tell you the truth Evan, I don’t really know. Celestia has the guards tracking him down as we speak, but… it’s weird. It’s as if he simply fell off the face of Equestria,” she informed me.

I nodded while she placed a firm hoof over my hand. “Evan, I need to ask you something. Something really important,” she told me and I nodded. “How do you feel about me?” she asked, and I gave her a confused look.

“What do you mean ‘feel about you?’ I don’t get it?” I asked and she looked at me with her eyes, they almost looked pleading.

“I need to know exactly what you think of me.” I took a moment to think, but she interrupted my thoughts and narrowed it down to what she really meant. “Do you really believe that I’m your birth mother?” she asked in a serious tone and I snickered.

“No, of course not. I’m not THAT stupid. I know that you’re not really my blood mother, but… I don’t know how to say it. You’re like… my mom. You love me, you care for me… you protect me, give me shelter… isn’t that what a mom is?” I asked and she nodded. “So wouldn’t that… you know, make you my mom?” I asked. She was lost in my explanation.

“Evan… that doesn’t really make sense,” she replied in confusion and I sighed.

“I don’t know how it works, I just… back on my world, I considered a cow to be like my mom. She loved me, and groomed me, and sat me down before making me talk to her… she was my mom,” I replied and Twilight shook her head.

“No, Evan, that’s only a motherly figure. Not your real mother,” she stated and I just brought my hands up and shrugged.

“Then I don’t know Twilight. If you weren’t my mom then things wouldn’t make sense. I just… I just want a mom.” I sighed and she rested a hoof on my shoulder.

“I’m sorry that all this happened and that you can’t see her anymore.” Twilight offered me words of comfort, but I brushed them away.

“It’s not that…” I got a little choked, up but managed to word out my sentence. “I just… never mind, it doesn’t matter anyway,” I told her, then my cock throbbed, itching for attention. Luckily for me, the depression of everything was killing my urges.

“So… how do you feel about me?” she asked the same question that we had literally just went over.

“I just don’t know Twilight… you’re my mom, but now you’re acting like you don’t want me to be your son,” I replied in a depressed tone and she gasped.

“No, it’s not that! I mean, it… it’s complicated!” she quickly replied and I just shrugged before rolling over on the bed. I closed my eyes, but just as everything started to go black, a presence laid down behind me.

I glanced back to see Twilight rubbing a hoof along my back. “Evan, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. I just wanted to know.” She pressed her face against my shoulder and I felt a tear trickle onto my bare back.

I rolled over and hugged her tightly, my boner pressing up against her and sending a shiver of pleasure up my spine. ‘Yeah… this is really awkward…’ I thought to myself. “I love you mom, it’s just that sometimes I…” She cut me off and placed a hoof to my mouth.

“It’s okay. Things will work themselves out. They always do.” She gave words of comfort that I could live with, for now. “Evan?” she asked and I slowly nodded. “I didn’t know you smoked.” I snickered.

“I don’t,” I replied. I had never smoked once in my life, not tobacco, not weed, and absolutely no narcotics.

“But when you arrived the other day, you had a cigar in your mouth,” she reminded me and I chuckled.

“That’s my Schwarzenegger cigar. I have it so that I can pose like him when I feel like it. Though I wasn’t posing like Schwarzenegger, more like Clint Eastwood,” I informed her and she gave me a questioning gaze.

“You’ve told me who Schwarzenegger was, but who is Clint Eastwood?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“It doesn’t matter really. He was just a really cool “Wild West” actor.” I shut my eyes and slowly fell into a semi unconscious state. I could still feel everything that was happening, but I was too tired to care. We laid like that for over an hour before another presence entered the bed.

A slobbery tongue licked around my nose and lips. “Lassie,” I groaned tiredly and, as I opened my lips to speak, her tongue managed to sneak inside my mouth, tasting the unknown.

“ACK! Lassie!” I coughed from the feel of her dog tongue in my mouth. Twilight nearly leapt out of bed from my sudden outburst. Lassie pawed at my chest and yipped playfully. Twilight sighed to herself contently and looked to me with loving eyes.

“Maybe you should take her out. Get some fresh air, it might help,” Twilight offered and I nodded before getting out of bed. “Oh… and maybe put some clothes on.” Twilight giggled. I looked down to my boner before rolling my eyes.

Shuffling through the clothes dresser, I retrieved the duster uniform and slapped it on. Twilight had so graciously cleaned it for me, so now it wasn’t all squishy and nasty from that magic goo stuff.

It still fit with a comfortable snugness, but now my boner twitched every so often and there was a bulge in the groin of my trousers. “Figures… wanna come along Twi?” I asked, but she shook her head.

“No, it’s okay. But do take care, I wouldn’t want anything to happen to you,” she replied and I nodded, then whistled for Lassie, who hopped over to my side with a playful pant.

As I left, I retrieved my cowboy hat from the hat stand and placed it on my head. I left the library before pacing over to my truck. At first I was going to take Heather with me, my Norinco shotgun, but then I remembered the slip up I had with her.

“Maybe next time Heather,” I apologized, then retrieved my SVT-40. “Oh how I love you so,” I told the gun before also taking a few shells of ammo and a fully loaded magazine. Rather than walking to a destination, I just flopped down by the rear passenger side tire of Cadence.

Lassie walked over and I noticed that her rear end walked a little to the one side while her front walked straight, like most puppies do. She plopped down on my lap and yawned before sprawling out and snuggling into my coat. He fur was starting to grow, like most Rough Collies do when they get older.

“You’re something else dog…” I trailed off and rubbed the box of my truck. “So Cadence… it’s been a while since we talked,” I told the truck.

“Excuse me? I’m sorry if it seems like I’m eavesdropping, but I don’t think I’ve really talked to you that much.” The voice nearly scarred the crap out of me.

“Woah! What?... Oh, sorry,” I apologized to… uhm… I had forgotten her name. She was the pink alicorn with the… thing about love or something. I had heard a few stories about her but stopped paying attention pretty quick because they were kind of gay… okay, they were pretty gay. I mean, apparently she could like make ponies love each other so that nothing would ever be wrong… and that’s where I stopped listening.

I mean, Equestria needed a princess of love? Seriously? Regardless, I wouldn’t think any lesser of her just because of the title.

“Well, I heard you say it’s been a while since we talked, but we haven’t really talked at all since your arrival,” she informed me, and I thought for a moment.

“You’re that mare, err, princess… the pink one that was at… the palace place when I tried going home.” I struggled to remember, but had a difficult time doing so. Most things important seemed to stick with me, but most of my memories were always hazy and sketchy.

“Indeed. I am Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, but please, just call me Cadence,” she informed me of her full name, nickname, and I guess she informed me that she was a princess.

I looked to my truck, then back to her, then back to my truck. “Yah hear that Cadence, she’s got the same name as you,” I told my truck and the princess in front of me raised an eyebrow of peculiar interest.

“Indeed… well, Twilight has told me many stories about you. I have wanted to meet you personally for some time. Please allow me the pleasure of being properly introduced,” she requested in a very dignified manner.

I placed Lassie to the side and hopped up to my full height. Funny, she was actually taller than most other ponies. On her hindlegs, she was a bit taller than five feet, standing at about my chest level.

She took a step back and looked at my imposing frame. “Indeed, Twilight was right. You are very tall…” She gulped, then offered her hoof.

I took her hoof in a firm grip and gave it one shake before releasing it. “Name’s Evan Burdick, but yah can call me Burdy if yah fancy,” I told her and she gulped before nodding.

“Yes… well, it was nice finally meeting you face to face Eva... err, Burdy. I must be on my way. Twilight wished to speak to me about something important,” she stuttered out, almost as if she feared me for some unknown reason.

She quickly paced away to the front of the library while I flopped back down, Lassie returning to her spot on my lap. “See that Cadence? She thinks I’m scary.” I chuckled, but Lassie whined out a vocal note.

“Huh… what’s that Lassie?” I asked and she whined out another vocal note. “You think that I do look a little intimidating?” I asked and she whined again, declining my answer. She pawed at my chest, trying stressfully to paw higher.

Leaning my face down to see what she was trying to paw at, she managed to paw at my mustache, which was turning into more of a handlebar mustache, and connecting sideburns. As she pawed at them, she let out another vocal note, which was more of a bark.

“My stash and burns are scary?” I asked and she let out another vocal note before she tilted her head to one side, saying in dog language: Not really. “You think that, just maybe, I should get it shaved? It has been a while since I last shaved,” I asked and she brought her paws closely together, saying: Just a little.

“Just a trim?” I asked, she nodded, then stretched out with a yawn and relaxed on my lap. “What about you Cadence, what do you think?” I asked, but my truck gave no reply. “Yeah, I think so too. Wanna come along?” I asked my diesel powerhouse.

Again I got no reply and simply chucked. “Alright, if you wanna just chill today, that’s cool with me.” I placed Lassie to the side, to her obvious dissatisfaction, then stood up and stretched.

“Come on Lassie, let’s go see the sights.” With that, we got up and started traversing through the town aimlessly. As we passed house after house, building after building, I started noticing that, despite the other day, ponies were starting to act normal again.

It was as if the feel of gloom in the town had been lifted by some mythical force. ‘Probably one of those magical things from this world.’ I thought silently to myself as I arrived at Sugarcube Corner.

“Hey Lassie, yah hungry?” I asked and my faithful follower piped up a happy bark. “Alrighty then, let’s get something tah eat!” I said in an upbeat tone.

We entered the establishment and the only ponies inside that I could see were Mr. and Mrs. Cake and their twin children: The Cake Twins. “Howdy,” I greeted with a tip of my hat before removing it.

“Oh uhm… hello,” replied Mr. Cake in a somewhat nervous tone. “Uhm… Evan, is it? Sorry, I think perhaps your name slipped my mind,” he stuttered, teeth almost chattering.

“Relax, I’m not in any way offended,” I stated and dropped a Luna bit on the table.

“I need a fine soda. And for my dear friend here…” I trailed off and placed my puppy on the table. “A saucer of your finest milk please. Oh, and two cinnamon rolls, if yah don’t mind,” I stated in a very gentlemanly voice.

“Oh yes… right away!” Mr. Cake took note of my order in a very nervous voice. His wife, Mrs. Cake, ran the cashier and checked my order through, offering me my change.

“Keep it,” I replied and she gasped.

“Oh deary, we can’t. That’s way too much.” She was nearly breathtaken, but I waved my hand. She nodded graciously and placed the change back in the cash register. “If you insist.” She seemed a lot less edgy then her husband who, when he returned, was very shaky.

He was barely able to hold the glasses without spilling them. “He-r-re yah are, mister…” he stammered and I rested my hand over his hoof.

“Buddy, relax. I’m not scary,” I stated and he gulped.

“Mister I… I saw what you did for the town with that boom thingy of yours and… and I gotta say it’s mighty scary. No offence sir, but… you are too,” he informed me. I sighed rather irritably while rolling my eyes.

“Listen, just take a deep breath and pretend that I’m no different than any other stallion.” Just as I said that, a brief memory played through my head from my twelfth grade math class.

* * *

I twiddled my thumbs in absolute boredom. Once again, I was left with nothing to do. I was always just one step ahead of the class and always finished my work early because… well, it was kind of easy once I knew what to do. At first trigonometry seemed ridiculously difficult but, in the end, it was really quite simple.

I tilted my head back, leaned my chair backwards, stroked my hands over my face, and let out a quiet groan of boredom. As I leaned forwards, I thunked my head off the edge of my desk with mediocre force, though I didn’t really feel anything.

Letting out another groan, I looked to the room then tossed my pencil into the feeble ceiling tiles. The tip stabbed into the ceiling and remained lodged, just dangling about like a free pencil should.

One of my friends, who was a ‘Link Leader,’ snickered to himself. I think his name was… damn, I can never remember people’s names, oh well, I’ll call him Grieg. “Nice one Burdy, now how’ll you finish your work?” he laughed and I shrugged.

“Oh… I don’t know. I think I’ll just use the force and make it done.” I focused on my paper, pointing my hands at my already finished work like I was actually using the force on it. “There, done,” I stated with a fake breath of exhaustion.

I flipped up the paper so he could see. “Hey, uhh… do you mind if I just copy your answers?” he asked and I shrugged.

“I don’t see why not,” I replied, then handed him the sheet.

“Man, cool. Thanks.” He took the paper and began scribbling down the answers onto his sheet. My Asian friend, Mai, looked over to me.

“Hey, can I use your sheet after him?” she asked and I snickered.

“Aren’t Chinese people supposed to be smarter than rednecks?” I asked and she gasped.

“I am not Chinese. I’m Vietnamese,” she retorted. She knew I was just dicking around with her, so she wasn’t too scorned about it.

“Isn’t it the same thing?” I asked in a dumbfounded voice. Her facial expression was hilarious as she looked to me like I was stupid.

“NO! It’s not even close!” she laughed, knowing that I was still screwing around.

“Well sure it is. You guys all have slanty eyes and are like… ho, gwong chow! Dwang pang pwong pee dah!” I mocked oriental accents while my friend Grieg, or whatever his real name was, chuckled.

“Burdy… you’re so bad,” he laughed and I gave him a blunt face.

“I’m not bad,” I stated in a fake serious tone, a tone that was easier to depict than Schwarzenegger’s acting.

Grieg laughed again then rolled his eyes. “Yeah I know. You’re actually really nice, but only if someone gets to know you,” he stated and I brought my hands up in defence.

“Who would think I’m not nice?” I asked defensively, and in a rather squeaky voice.

“I dunno, a lot of people. You’re kind of scary,” he replied and I just rolled my eyes.

“Who would ever think I’m scary?” I asked, thinking it to be a different answer than what I got.

“A lot of people,” he informed me, almost the exact same answer as last time.

“Why?” I asked curiously. I didn’t think I was that scary. I mean I didn’t have any wicked facial scars, or brutish stubble or an eyepatch.

“Uhm, well, you’re like six foot four…” I interrupted him.

“Six two,” I corrected and he nodded.

“Yeah, anyway, you’re like six foot two, you’re built like a mountain, you exercise in work boots, you’ve always got this… blunt look on your face like you’re a terminator and… you wear camouflage. The only way you could be scarier is if you had a gun with you,” he informed me and I was lost in my thoughts.

“Yeah but… I’m not ‘really’ scary. I mean…” I stumbled for some words, but Grieg just shrugged.

“No, you’re not actually bad. It’s just that people around the school are intimidated by you, but if they got to know you they’d know that you’re actually a nice guy. For the longest time I was petrified of you. Well, that is until I actually met you and got to know you.” He offered me words of semi-comfort. I let out an exhale, baffled that people could actually consider me scary. I’m like a cuddly grizzly bear for Christ’s sake, what’s so terrifying about that?

* * *

Present time…

“Buddy, just relax. Here, take a seat and have a drink, on me.” I offered him a chair beside me. He fearfully sat beside me and I sighed in humor. He gulped as his wife set a glass of water in front of him.

I gave him a pat on the back. “So good chap, how’s business?” I asked in a cheery tone.

“Good… it’s good,” he stammered as he brought his glass up to his lips. He was shaking so nervously that he was nearly splashing it.

“That’s good,” I stated, then took a sip of my soda. Lassie finished slurping up the milk from her saucer and started shredding apart one of the frosted cinnamon rolls, her playful whines echoing off the establishment walls.

As she finished up, her tongue slurped across her lips, trying to lick up whatever was left of the icing that stuck to her facial fur. My puppy quickly spotted the second cinnamon roll and made a beeline for it.

“Eh! I don’t think so, this one’s mine,” I told her, snatching it away before she could snag it. She flopped onto her rump and started whining, giving me her puppy dog eyes. “Ugh… okay, you can have half,” I told her, ripping the pastry in half and offering her the larger of the two halves.

The adorable Collie began to thrash the sweet around, then placed her paws on the two sides and began to devour it. In one bite, I devoured my half so that she couldn’t puppy dog eye me into giving her the rest.

“You’re uhm… very kind, sir. Giving your pet that kind of food.” Mr. Cake expressed his feelings towards my offerings of kindness.

“Nah, I’m just naturally good spirited. I just like to see others smile,” I told him and, for the first time, he smiled without too much fear in his expression. Returning his gaze forwards, he took a sip of his water.

Suddenly, a big fluff of spherical fur began to bounce around like a ball. It just looked like a really big pink bouncy ball. Before I could figure out what it was, there was a whizzing sound as it spun into what looked like a tornado.

I felt a damp mist spew at me as the thing spun. After a moment or two, the fluff stopped spinning, revealing Pinkie Pie. She was giggling as she trotted over and patted Mr. Cake on the shoulder.

“Sorry Mr. Cake, I know you don’t like me doing that in here,” she apologized… I think she was apologizing, but if she knew he didn’t like it, why did she do it? Bah, I’ll never know.

“OH HEY EVAN!” She sounded absolutely thrilled to see me.

“Pinkie,” I greeted her with a nod of my head before taking another sip of my soda. Pinkie bounced on all fours around the counter and to the cash register, and then continued bouncing in an energetic manner.

My head bobbed in motion with her bounces as I watched her. “So uhm Pinkie, I’ve been meaning to ask… what do you think about the whole Tristan thing?” I asked and she stopped bouncing, giving me a semi-serious look.

“Well… It wasn’t very nice what he did, but I know that the royal guard is after him, so… I dunno,” she replied, almost as if she wasn’t all that affected by the whole ordeal.

“So what do you think about me? Do you think I’m a failure because I couldn’t stop him?” I asked and she gave me a shocked look.

“WHAT?! ARE YOU CRAZY?! You did stop him. He’s gone from Ponyville now and you destroyed the alicorn amulet so now he can’t ever get his powers back!” Pinkie’s reply relieved me of some of my self-doubt.

“Thanks Pinkie. I’m just kind of feeling a little down lately and I kinda wanted to know what ponies thought about me,” I informed her.

“Well silly, don’t gloom around, just turn that frown upside down!” she squealed while, at the same time, prying my mouth into a smiley face with her forehooves. With that she began to bounce around the store, making up some musical song about being happy even when things look the worst.

After she was finished, my eyes stayed wide. “Wow… okay then.” I scratched the side of my head as I tried to register everything that had just happened. Lassie began to whimper and whine, pawing at my coat.

“No more cinnamon rolls right now. You’ll get a tummy ache,” I told her before picking her up and setting her down on the floor. “Well Pinkie, I’ll catch yah later,” I said with a nod. I looked to Mr. Cake and smiled, happy to have made a new friend. “You too Mr. C, take it easy eh,” I told him with a pat on the back.

I placed my cowboy hat back on and strapped my SVT-40 across my back while I left the gingerbread house.

As I walked the streets, I was happy to see that ponies were really getting back to their old routines, without the gloomy looks on their faces that I remembered from right after Tristan’s escape.

Before I knew it, I was at Rarity’s. I made sure to knock rather lightly, but enough that she’d be able to hear. “Coming darling!” A voice echoed from inside and, before I could posture myself, Rarity swung the door open.

“Oh… well hello darling. I wasn’t expecting you to come by today, please do come in.” She was quick to offer her hospitality, which I graciously accepted. I removed my hat and gave her a nod, I guess because of style or something or because a man is supposed to take his hat off when in the presence of a lady… or mare. Rarity was probably the only mare that I’d take my hat off for in a gentlemanly fashion, since she was the most ladylike and acted as such.

“So darling, how have you been? Twilight said that you weren’t feeling so well,” Rarity asked with a hint of worry in her voice.

“Well, actually, that’s partly why I came over here, to ask you the same thing,” I replied and she thought to herself before answering.

“Well… I suppose I am doing pretty well, all things considered,” she informed me. I was about to ask what her thoughts were about me and Tristan, when a crash upstairs made me realize that she was probably referring to something else.

“Ugh…” she groaned. “One moment darling.” Rarity quickly zoomed away and I could hear her voice from upstairs, though it was rather faint. “Sweetie Belle! What have you done… oh nononono, this is terrible. Those were gems meant specifically for a dress I was designing.” There was further conversation, but something else caught my attention.

A cat began to hiss and claw at me. “Woah, What the fuck?!” I scowled as I tried to step back, nearly stumbling over Lassie who was hiding behind my feet. The frilly cat continued to hiss and claw at me, making Lassie cringe behind my feet.

“Aww, poor Lassie.” I picked up my dog and cradled her in my arms. The cat hissed once more before tossing its nose into the air and skipping away like a royal prick. “Douche,” I whispered under my breath.

Rarity soon returned with a distraught look on her face. “I’m terribly sorry dear, but I might have to cut our meeting short. I recently ran into… technical difficulties,” she informed me. The white filly from school, Sweetie Belle, was at her side with some ridiculous looking sparkly work coveralls.

“Well, I was going to ask for a haircut, but I’ll save that for later. And uhm, I need to ask you about… Tristan,” I told her, and a look of distaste came across her face.

“That no good, pilfering rat is scum… ahem, pardon my language,” she apologized for the very mild tone and I shrugged. “Darling please, let’s not speak of him. What he did was inexcusable and the royal guard will find him and punish him as such,” she explained to me everything about the topic that I wanted to know except one thing.

“You don’t think I’m a failure, do you?” I asked and she gasped in shock.

“You? A failure? My word, I would never think so low about you darling. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the newest hero of Ponyville. You kicked that disgusting little weasel out of Ponyville. Why in the world would you think yourself a failure?” she asked and I shook my head.

“Oh, no reason really. I was just having self-doubts for a while. Thanks for the vote of confidence,” I thanked her and she looked down to her sister, then back to me.

“Darling, I hate to be a burden, but if you would be so kind as to escort my sister to Applejack’s for the day, I would be most appreciative,” she asked, in a very ladylike way, and I nodded my acceptance of the task.

“Sure, no problem,” I told her and looked to Sweetie Belle. “Well, if that’s everything, I guess we’ll be on our way.” Rarity nodded, let out a sigh of exhaustion, then trotted slowly back upstairs as Sweetie Belle, Lassie, and I left.

Sweetie Belle pranced around with Lassie in an enjoyable nature of excitement. “So Evan, why haven’t you come to school lately?” Sweetie Belle asked from out of the blue. I pondered the question, then gave her the best answer I could come up with.

“Well… I haven’t really had time lately. Sorry, my schedule has just kind of been full recently,” I informed her.

“I knew it! I sooo told Diamond Tiara that the only reason you weren’t coming around was because you were too busy saving Equestria. She kept saying it was because you thought we were weird because we were blank flanks. Can you believe that?!” she gasped as we continued along, eventually reaching the dirt path leading to Sweet Apple Acres.

Sweetie Belle began to rant on and on about getting her cutie mark today, apparently they were going to be construction ponies. I guess their plan would be worth a shot. As we arrived, Sweetie Belle rushed over to the other two young fillies and showed them the coverall thingies that she had procured from her older sister.

The trio squealed in excitement then rushed off. Applejack trotted over and gave me a light punch to the side. “Ahh, just the pony… err uhm… guy, ah was looking fer,” she told me in an upbeat tone.

I raised an eyebrow while she began explaining what she needed me to do, not even bothering to ask if I would help, probably knowing as well as I did that I’d be helping regardless.

“Ah got some square hay bales that need tah be stacked. Ah’ll pay yah good, promise,” she offered, but I waved it off with my hand.

“Don’t worry about pay, I got money to spare,” I informed her and she gave me a genuine smile.

“Well ah’ll be. Thank yah kindly sugarcube… now go on, ain’t got much sunlight left today.” She smiled and began to trot off, but I reached down and spun her around. She gave me a shocked look and I gulped.

“Uhm… AJ, I need to ask you something, it’s weird and uhh…” I trailed off and she gulped.

“Uhh… are yah feelin okay?” she asked hesitantly and took a step back.

“Dandy, why?” I replied and she pointed to my crotch, where a tent was pitched. “Oh for the love of God, I’m under the effects of that goddess forsaken tetanus crap,” I muttered and she let out a ‘phew.’

“Sorry, was just wonderin’. Yah kinda grabbed me, said it was weird, and had a weird look in yer eye… that an yer uhh…” she trailed off, making me roll my eyes.

“It’s not that, it’s about Tristan.” Her faint smile immediately died.

“Ain’t got nothing tah say ‘bout that goon… hope he dies a pitiful death under a rock, mind muh language,” she apologized and I nodded.

“Yeah, right, anyway… you uhh… don’t think I’m a failure because I didn’t shoot him… do you?” I asked and her mouth went agape as she gave me a shocked look.

“Now what’s got yah thinkin yer some kinda failure? Heck, ah don’t know if ah’d be able tah kill him, so it’d never be right a me tah think down upon another if they couldn’t. Gee, ah dunno if killing is even the proper answer. Sugarcube, what yah did was just fine, an anypony who says differently can talk directly tah me cause ah’ll set em straight.” AJ gave me words of comfort that nearly brought tears to my eyes.

“Thanks AJ… ahem, I’ll get to those bales now,” I told her then paced over to the barn and peeked inside. Lassie followed, but she soon spotted Winona and the duo rushed off, barking playfully at each other. Nopony was around, leaving me to my own device.

I quickly went to work stacking the bales, mostly into the far left corner. Before I knew it, Big Macintosh was beside me, grabbing bales by the twine rope with his teeth and tossing them up.

“Howdy Mac,” I greeted him and he simply nodded. “Fine day, huh?” I asked and again he just nodded. “So uhh… anything new happening lately?” I asked, trying to make small talk with what I hoped would be my first male pony friend.

He shook his head and I rolled my eyes. “Don’t talk much, huh?” He shook his head and I asked another question. “No as in: no you don’t talk much, or no as in: No, you do talk?” I asked. He opened his mouth to say something, but then just grabbed a bale with his teeth and tossed it up.

It didn’t get high enough, and tumbled back down. I grabbed it before it fell then tossed it up, the bale landing on top of the pile. Leaning on the side of the bale piles, I looked to him with curiosity.

“Alright big guy… since you don’t talk much, I’ll be the story teller,” I said with a bright smile, but he barely even made eye contact for a second. ‘Christ, and this stallion is pretty big, for a pony, yet he is about as shy as Fluttershy,’ I thought to myself.

“Well let’s see, I came from another world and can never go home…” I began as I started tossing bales into a new pile. “I’m living with my mom in a library treehouse… well, she’s not my blood mother, she’s just my mother…” I continued to tell him about me.

“I secluded myself in the basement for over six months. I like to work out, I’m partly Christian…” Big Mac started to struggle as he tried to keep up with my pace. I slowed down a little and matched a slower pace with him so that he wasn’t pushing himself so hard.

“You know, you don’t have to push yourself to match me. I won’t think you’re weak or anything,” I told him. He nodded with a gulp. “Well, I guess you can already see that I’m strong. I’m not actually all that scary when you get to know me… ugh I guess I have a natural talent with animals like cows and dogs… and I’m kind of gentle, but don’t tell anypony that I said that,” I ordered him in a rather soft voice and he nodded his reply.

Soon enough we finished and I rubbed my right arm across my face, brushing away the sweat. “So how bout you, red? You got a story?” I asked in a panting voice. He stepped back and gulped, looking at me as I leaned on the bale pile.

“Well?” I asked curiously, wondering what the story was behind him. His ears perked up and he quickly rushed out of the barn. “Okay then…” I trailed off, feeling a tad bit sad that he had run off on me. I was really hoping to make a male friend. I seriously needed a guy friend, hanging out with a bunch of mares made me feel weird when I thought about it.

As I leaned against the pile of hay, I got a bit aroused, still under the effects of the tetanus potion. “Oh for fuck’s sake…” I whispered a silent curse to myself. I tried to think of other things, but all I could think about was getting off.

“Why the hell do they have those stupid side effects? Isn’t there a more sensible solution?” I asked myself. ‘Well there is the needle,’ my conscience replied. “I said sensible, not worse,” I told him. My conscience replied, but not in the way I would’ve thought, my cock twitched in need of attention.

‘That’s all I have to say,’ my conscience told me, then my twitching buddy became unbearable. “Okay, okay, okay! Shit…” I cursed to myself before peering around to make sure I was alone.

Sheepishly making my way around to the rear side of the hay pile, I made sure I was alone. A shiver went down my back as I pulled out my cock and began to stroke him rapidly.

“Come on… come on!... Jesus, you wanted to get off so… cum already…” I was a little hesitant about talking to myself during masturbation, it just wasn’t something I was used to.

Although I was heavily aroused, no matter which way I stroked myself, I couldn’t get off. “You know, if you weren’t such a dick, I would just ignore you,” I muttered to my cock as I continued to jerk off.

After several minutes of just standing, jerking off, I wondered if perhaps it was because I was standing that made it difficult to orgasm. ‘It shouldn’t, seeing as how I’ve jerked off while standing before… I think I have anyway,’ I thought to myself about the topic before quickly crawling on top of the bales, lying down, then continuing my indecent act.

“Come on… come on… COME ON!” I started getting angry at my inability to cum, and then of course my conscience came around to laugh and make puns. “Yeah, cum on, cum on, cum on me!’ he snickered. I snarled in reply and started jerking my shaft a little more furiously.

Before I could even think, a wet tongue licked the side of my neck. “Ack!” I gasped then looked to notice Lassie, her front end lowered as she panted, wanting to play. “Not now Lassie,” I told, her but she whined and pawed at my face. I started to scratch behind her ears while still choking the chicken.

‘Man, start fantasizing about stuff. I want to imaging fucking a pussy,’ my conscience argued. I thought to myself. This whole time I had been so fixated on beating off, that I hadn’t really imagined myself fucking anything really. I had just stood around, fucking my hand.

“Oh yeah, that’s right,” I replied in an upbeat tone. “I guess I should fantasize about something, huh?” I asked and my conscience replied in an upbeat tone, ‘Yeah, the one with the grey pegasus, she’s sexy!’

“Oh? How bout fuck you. I’m not gonna imagine myself fucking a pony!” I snarled and he snickered. ‘Why not, you have before. And besides, if you don’t, then you won’t be able to get rid of your little problem… ahem, I guess it’s a big problem.’

I brought my right hand to my forehead and massaged it, thinking furiously about how to stop this insatiable urge. Before I could think, the smell of cock entered my nostrils and I briefly reminisced on the fact that I was stroking my forehead with my masturbating hand.

A shiver went down my spine, along with a tingly sensation. My senses sharpened and I got the feeling that something wasn’t right. I listened for a moment, but all I could hear was my heartbeat.

The brief second that I had stopped masturbating drove my cock insane, sending mental notes to my brain to start jerking off again. My urges quickly took over and I was back to beating off.

“God this is difficult,” I mused to myself.

“Sometimes when my sister is doing it, she closes her eyes,” replied a young voice from behind me.

“GAH!” I screamed in shock, leaping up, but losing my balance and falling down the hay pile. I shook my head several times before looking up to the tip of the hay pile, only to see the three crusaders and Lassie looking down on me.

“WHAT WERE YOU DOING!?” I gasped as I tried to conceal my member. Lassie let out a whining vocal note. “No, not you,” I replied and looked to the three crusaders.

Applebloom scratched her chin before remembering just what exactly they were doing. “Well, we were tryin tah build a nicer deck fer our treehouse, but we ain’t strong enough, so we asked Big Mac if he could help, but he couldn’t. ‘BUT,’ he did send us over here tah ask if yah could help us,” she informed me.

“Well… how long were you watching me?” I asked and Sweetie Belle shrugged.

“Just a few seconds. We saw that you were trying to cast a magic spell with your horn and sometimes when my sister is having trouble, she closes her eyes and tries harder,” she replied and I sighed in relief, thankful that they weren’t familiar with human anatomy… or maybe they weren’t familiar with male genitals… hopefully both.

The good news was that the scare they had gave me had driven away my urges for the moment. “So how bout it?” Scootaloo asked and I raised an eyebrow.

“How bout what?” I asked, but rather than answering, she tossed me a hammer.

“Will yah help us build a nicer deck?” Applebloom asked in a very hopeful voice.

I scratched my head in thought. I didn’t really have much to do, but I really didn’t want to get aroused around foals, even if it was unintentional. “Uhm… I don’t know…” I trailed off, but they all rushed down and gave me puppy dog eyes. “Oh okay,” I stated, then we all walked towards their treehouse. As we passed the entrance to the barn, I grabbed my rifle and slung it across my back, just to be safe.

As we continued towards their treehouse in the forest, they became affiliated with Lassie. The foals absolutely adored her, and would barely ever set her down. Lassie, in the same respect, relished in the attention she was getting, making me roll my eyes.

* * *

Late afternoon…

So the afternoon didn’t go so bad. I managed to keep it in my pants and it was kind of nice to do some construction, even if it was half assed.

The new deck looked… alright. It wasn’t super nice like a mansion deck, but for a treehouse, it would suffice. “ALRIGHT! CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS CONSTRUCTION PONIES!” they all cheered, then looked at each other’s flanks.

“Anything?” Sweetie Belle asked, but Applebloom and Scootaloo shrugged. “Darn… well, at least we got a new deck,” she said in an enthusiastic voice. The others nodded then all looked to me.

“Thanks for the help,” the thanked me in unison, then all ran up and hugged me. The contact with them would’ve been nice, if I hadn’t already been previously aroused. The contact simply worsened it.

“Ugh… yeah… ngh… no pro… problem,” I grunted, but they must’ve noticed something was up, because they all gave me weird looks.

“Are you alright?” Applebloom asked worriedly and I nodded.

“Yeah, fine, just fine. Listen uhh… it was fun constructing with you and all, but… I gotta go!” I stammered quickly before briefly returning their embrace, grabbing my rifle from the nearby bench, and then rushing off. Lassie yipped, then quickly rushed after me.

I didn’t go far, only fifty yards, before setting my SVT-40 down and flopping myself against the trunk of a tree, sitting my rump on the cold ground. “God… I gotta find a better way to heal my injuries,” I whispered to myself before continuing my masturbation that had been interrupted earlier.

As my breathing slowed, my tempo became steady but, once again, I found it nearly impossible to get off. Lassie simply stood around, from time to time she’d find something interesting in the fresh grass and bark at it.

I sat for nearly twenty minutes before my senses went on full alert again. I snatched up my rifle, then peeked around the tree trunk. Lassie noticed my action and rushed to my side. There was nothing. I turned my view to the opposite side and began to peer around, my rifle leading my sight. Just as I peeked around the tree, I spotted something big and red.

My finger instantaneously began to squeeze the trigger but, at the very last possible second, I stopped, yanking the rifle away with a gasp. “GAH!” There was a moment’s pause and Mac stumbled back a little, almost as startled as I was.

“What the fuck Mac, I nearly blew your head off!” I told him with a serious tone in my voice. He looked down to the ground in timid pity, sad that I had spoken to him in such a stern voice. I let out a sigh. “Sorry Mac, I know that your shy and stuff… it’s just that you scarred the living crap out of me,” I informed him and he nodded, still looking at the ground. “Hey Mac… Mac.” I tried getting his attention, snapping my fingers to try and get him to look at me.

He peeked up a glance and I smiled. “Sorry for being so stern. I’m just not used to getting startled like that.” I comforted him as best I could. There was another moment’s pause before I wondered to myself. “Hey Mac? Are you like… taking a stroll or something?” I asked and he looked back to the treehouse.

“Oh, just making sure muh sis is okay,” he replied and my mouth nearly went agape.

“Holy crap… you just… talked,” I gasped, then shook off the thought. He looked down on me with a sudden, serious gaze.

“What were ‘you’ doing?” he asked in a very serious tone. I opened my mouth to reply, and then realized that I was in a bit of a pickle.

I was jerking off with his younger sister nearby and, on top of that, it would be difficult to construct a lie because my cock was still out. “Uhm… in all honesty…” I trailed off and his serious gaze continued to stare down on me. ‘God, I didn’t know this guy could be so serious,’ I thought before giving him the blunt truth.

“I got winged by a pellet of buckshot the other day and needed a healing potion, but now the side effects of that tetanus crap is hammering me and I’m hornier than… well, I’m pretty goddamn horny,” I informed him. He stood there for a minute before looking back to his sister, then back to me.

“Well okay… just as long as yah weren’t doin nothin funny tah Applebloom.” He relieved me of the stress from his gaze, but offered a new stressfulness.

“MAC! I’m not some freaky perv!” I argued, but he simply shrugged, trotted over to a tree only a few yards away from me, then slumped down to his flank, sitting in a similar fashion to me.

“Ah ain’t accusin’ yah of nothing, but ah can’t be too careful,” he replied. I closed my eyes and rested the back of my head against the tree trunk with a sigh. After a moment or two, I heard a light flapping sound.

My left eyebrow lowered while my right raised itself, curiosity enticing me to what the flapping sound was. I leaned my head forwards, only to be disgusted by the sight that beheld itself.

Mac was beating off. His large equine cock stood straight up as his damp, wet hoof travelled up and down the length of his shaft. “ECH! MAC!” I stuck my tongue out in disgust.

“What?” he asked with a shrug. ‘What? What?! WHAT?! That is how he replies? With ‘What?’ Is he serious?’

“What do you mean ‘what?’ You damn well know what! You’re jerking off!” I replied in a grossed out voice.

“Well tah be fair, you were too,” he stated. I tried to conjure up a reply but couldn’t. This was borderline gay.

“Yeah but… you’re a guy and I’m a guy and… it isn’t right. I’m not gay,” I told him and he shrugged.

“Well neither am I, but ah usually go here tah masturbate. And on top of that, ah’ve needed to do it all day,” he informed me.

“UGH! Okay, I’m out, this is too weird,” I stated and tried to stand up. Just as my rear was lifting off the ground, my arousal kicked in and my elbows gave out, flumping me back down to the ground.

‘Oh god no… I’m not gay… not even like 1%, not even like half a percent…’ I trailed off my thoughts and tried again, only to have the same results. My arousal was so determined to get off that it would barely allow me to perform simple actions.

“Havin a bit a trouble?” Mac asked, but I didn’t even look to him. The fapping sound of him jerking off was enough to twist my stomach.

Sitting back down, I was nearly blinded mentally by the sight of the stallion whom still stroked his cock attentively. “I can’t get off…” I trailed off, figuring if I couldn’t stand, I might as well discuss my problems, seeing as he was here.

“Well the point of masturbation is tah touch yourself-” he began, but I cut him off.

“No, it’s not that! I mean, for some reason, I can’t get off today. It’s just driving me insane,” I informed him. While he continued to stroke himself with his right hoof, he scratched his chin with his left.

“Well… sometimes I spit on my hoof to get it slick. Then it feels a bit better… and if I spit on my… thing, it feels even better when I rub it,” he informed me shyly.

I was disgusted by the fact that I was actually going to do this, but it was either this or wait until the effects wore off. I would be willing to bet that Mac would probably get off before that happened, so if I could get off first, then bugger off, I wouldn’t have to see that.

I took his advice, spat on my hand and cock, and then began to rub it. True to his word, it did feel a lot better. For several minute we just sat there, jerking off… god it sounds gay just saying that. Jerking off with another guy… ech.

After several minutes, I came to the very blunt decision that this wouldn’t work fast enough. “Yeah… this isn’t working,” I muttered.

“Well, sometimes,” he began as he rearranged himself. “If ah kind of tilt muh thing forwards, then cup muh balls with the other hoof, it feels really good.” He then proceeded to cup his balls with his left hoof while tilting his cock forwards. The tip pointed directly at me and the image burned my mind.

“UGH… I’ve been mentally scarred for life.” I felt extreme self-pity as I followed his lead. I will admit that he was true to his words. This did feel good.

He began panting, grunting, and muttering dirty things to himself. Mostly things about pussy, snatch, or buck hole… some of the things made me snicker because it was Mac saying it. I guess having a shy and timid stallion saying ‘snatch’ was just humorous.

After a short while, I couldn’t handle it anymore. “Okay, this is way to fucking gay for me.” I cursed myself for ever even contemplating this, and then tried to stand. My legs didn’t even respond, while my elbows started to work, before simply failing as my urges kicked in.

“Oh my God… this is embarrassing,” I whispered before sitting straight up. Mac’s pleasure became more vocal, sending shivers down my spine.

“Some… sometimes ah… ah think about havin sex… with mares… or even other things…” Mac panted before closing his eyes. “Whatever gets… gets me off… ah’ve even fantasized about Bridgette,” Mac informed me.

“Is she like a super-hot mare that every stallion wants to rut or something?” I asked and he shook his head. The answer I got almost made me lose my lunch

“Oh golly no… she’s uh… she’s a cow,” he replied honestly and I nearly gagged.

“GUH FUCK MAC!” I gagged again at the thought of it, but he merely shrugged innocently.

“Ah don’t know… ah just… ah just couldn’t get off one day an saw her out in the fields grazin an… well, ah just started fantasizing about her,” he informed me and I shivered in disgust. Just the thought of that creeps me out. Mac and a cow…

“Sometimes yah just have tah… go with the flow,” he stated and again I shivered. I tried painfully to get up but, despite my disgust for the subject, the urges held me down.

I quickly came to the consensus that I’d get off as quickly as I could, then just sulk about it later and despise myself for this very moment. I skimmed through my thoughts to try and fantasize about something, but there was nothing to fantasize about.

“If only I had my magazine… but nooo, it has to be in my truck,” I muttered in an annoyed tone. Mac’s grunts drowned out my angry mutters as I tried to think about the magazine. Thinking back to the cover of the Playcolt magazine, I tried to visualize the mare from the cover, but to no avail. All I could see was a blurry blob. That was nowhere sexy enough to get me off.

All that came to mind was the memory of jerking off inside my truck, which didn’t help. “Ugh… if only my truck was here, then I could get my magazine...” I trailed off, still trying to visualize the magazine. The memory of my soft truck seats came to mind, the comfort of how good my truck seats felt…

I shuddered, but Mac’s words of wisdom came to mind ‘Whatever gets me off…’ I shuddered, but still, all I could think about was my truck… ‘What?! Am I seriously getting heavily aroused by the thought of my truck?!’ I thought silently, but again, Mac’s words of wisdom came to mind.

Her chrome grill bars gleamed in the sunlight as she sat silently and I shuddered, still stroking myself outside my fantasy.

“Oh Cadence… I love yah baby,” I said, inside my fantasy world, as I slowly stroked my left hand along the driver side quarter panel. The headlight rack lights lit up just as I reached the driver side door. The edges of her body trim seemed to gleam in the afternoon gaze. Her glossy coat was soft to the touch, sending sensations through my hand that traveled throughout my entire body.

My hand started to stroke myself faster and I felt myself building up. I grunted quietly while my fantasy continued. I popped open the door and stepped in, my pleasure building with every passing second.

A gleam of light glanced across the entire hood as I gently closed the door. Her inside was warm and cozy, the seats were equal in terms of comfort. I let out a deep exhale as I stroked the steering wheel, gently rubbing the cruise control buttons as if they were nipples.

“Ohh Cadence… you like it when I do that?” I asked my baby. My hand stroked along the window and up to the roof, then to the sun visor. As I pulled it down, a set of keys fell, which I promptly snatched from midair.

“UGH,” Mac’s grunt punched through my fantasy bubble and gave me shivers. I had nearly forgotten that there was a stallion jerking off just a few feet away from me. I hadn’t noticed, but I was very close to an orgasm. As much as I hated to admit it, Mac was right. Just whatever got me off…

My right hand stroked along the dashboard of my truck as my tongue drooped out from my mouth and I began slobbering it along the steering wheel ring. “Oh yeah baby… I bet you like that, huh?” I asked in a very dirty tone.

My left hand began to stroke the left side of the dash while my right hand slipped down with the set of keys, into the ignition lock hole. I swiped the naughty key and the ignition lock replied with a beeping sound. “Oh, is that right?” I asked, then started licking the cruise control buttons.

I started lacing the key tip around the ignition key hole. “Mmm… you’ve been naughty… I think I should punish you.” I whispered to her in a seductive voice. I lined up the tip with the entrance and slowly stuffed it in until I could push it no further.

I let out a hushed sigh as I rubbed my cheek against the steering wheel, setting off the horn. “Yes honey… soon.” I began to twist the keys until the dash indicator read ‘Wait to start’ in red letters.

I felt pressure building up in my groin and my back began to arch itself naturally. Quiet groans escaped my mouth as the pressure soon became too much for me to handle. My hand jerked erratically around my cock as I began to reach the climax that I had been desiring all day.

The indicator light disappeared and I cranked the keys. The engine rumbled to life with the iconic diesel chug. I felt my hips lock up while my body tensed. I let out a powerful moan as I felt my cock blow its load, unloading my entire capacity onto the ground in front of me.

Quickly falling out from my fantasy, I shuddered about the awkwardness and mental scarring it had caused. “I don’t want to go to the doctor’s ever again…” I muttered. Mac was grunting heavily, eyes closed, and hips jerking. I raised an eyebrow due to how strangely he masturbated. It was like nothing I had ever heard of before. He was literally acting like he was having sex. My eyes went wide as I realized something terrible…

* * *

Minutes before, Big Macintosh’s fantasy world…

Mac was hornier than a ten peckered billy goat, and all day he was having a frustratingly hard time keeping 'It' out of sight. But now in the barn, all alone, he had a chance to get rid of 'It'. He quickly began jerking himself off, trying as hard as he could to get off as quickly as he could to lessen the chances of being caught by somepony.

Not long after he had started, he heard a faint moan from a few stables over. He stopped jerking and listened to make sure he wasn't just hearing things. Sure enough, another moan could be heard. Curiosity getting the better of him, he stood up and silently traveled towards the origin of the moans.

He slowly crept around the corner of the stable, only to see his eldest, younger sister, bent over and masturbating, with her snatch in plain view. With the way she was bent over, Applejack hadn't noticed Big Mac. The big red stallion held his chest, trying to keep his racing breathing to a minimum. He gulped deeply and was just about to sneak away, when a moan from AJ caught Mac's attention.

His rod stiffened and made the stallion grunt. Another, more pleasured moan, made him turn his view back to his sister, who was still occupied with herself. Urges, having got the better of him, subconsciously controlled Mac's right hoof down to his cock, then began to stroke it as his eyes never deterred from his sister's soaking cunt.

As AJ continued to pleasure herself in front of Mac, albiet, unnoticed to her, Mac grunted rather loudly. AJ's eyes went wide as her tail whipped between her legs and she spun around with a scream, ready to boot whoever was peeping on her. As she realized who it was, she became a mix of anger and embarrassment.

"MAC!" She screamed and Mac stumbled back, almost on the verge of an orgasm. "What in tarnation do yah think yer doin?" AJ screamed and Mac just gulped then tried to sputter out an excuse. "Don't yah lie big brother! You'se was watching me, weren't yah?" She yelled.

Mac gulped then nodded again in shame. "Sorry sis... ah... ah jus..." He trailed his front hoof around in the dirt, looking only to the ground. AJ continued to hold her flank, hiding it from her brother's view. Her heart was still pounding and her nerves were still on end, but she eventually settled with the thought that at least it wasn't some pervert all the way from Ponyville.

With a sigh, she looked to Mac with a loving smile. "Ah forgive yah Mac. Just never ever peep on a mare, ever again. It ain't what gentlecolt's do." She ordered him. Big Mac nodded, stood up and gripped his sister in a tight hug, his erection accidentally brushing up against AJ’s stomach, sending a pleasured shiver up her body.

“Thank yah sis,” Mac thanked his sister.

“On one condition,” she stated and Mac gulped.

“Ahhh, come on sis, I cleaned the stalls last time,” Mac pleaded, thinking that was what she had in mind.

“Nuh, uh. That ain’t what ah’m talkin bout Mac,” Applejack replied, making Mac wonder just what she had in mind. Unbeknownst to him, he had already been aroused beforehoof, and that brief contact had been the final straw.

Slowly stepping back, she turned around and wiggled her flank in full view for Mac to behold. “Sis! Whatta yah thinkin?! Granny would-” he began, but Applejack whipped back around and planted her lips on Mac’s.

For a moment, they shared a very passionate kiss, their tongues tangling together. After their kiss concluded, Applejack spun back around, dangling her rump in front of Mac. “Come on big brother! Ah know yah still want tah cum. Why not do it in me?” she asked seductively.

“WE CAN’T DO THAT! What if yah got pregnant!?” Mac gasped and AJ rolled her eyes.

“Ah ain’t in heat no more. Don’t worry bout it. Now come on, rut yer little sis.” She giggled, continuing to sway her rump to and fro.

“Well… if yah insist… but ah don’t think Granny would approve,” Mac replied back. AJ just rolled her eyes, nearly dying of deprivation.

Mac’s gut wrenched in nervousness. If somepony were to see them…

He stood behind his sister, his pony shaft now twitching in anticipation. He let out a deep exhale. “Are yah sure sis?” he asked and she nodded.

“Yes, just put it in me already!” she ordered him and he gulped before leaping up to his hindlegs and mounting his sister. Wiggling around to try and line himself up, he moved about and nearly lost his balance just before AJ shoved her rump right up against his groin.

Mac grunted as her flank cushioned his balls in such a way that he nearly came. “Calm down AJ… just let me get it in.” Mac continued to shuffle around until he felt something wet brush against the tip of his cock.

He twitched before slowly pushing at it, and he was surprised to feel himself slide into something warm and slick, almost like a tunnel that fit perfectly around his cock. He had never done this before, but the experience was thrilling.

Applejack moaned as her brother slid deeper and deeper into her love hole. “Oh yeah big brother, this feels great,” Applejack moaned. Big Mac soon found himself buried right to his hilt. He tried to breathe, but found it extremely difficult with the amount of nervousness that plagued his mind.

What if his sister got pregnant from this? Even if she wasn’t in heat and the uncommon event happened that she caught… The thoughts riddled Mac’s mind but soon stopped as AJ slowly tilted forwards, sliding his cock out of her wet, juicy snatch.

The feeling of not being inside of her nearly drove him over the edge, and he quickly stuffed himself back in with one powerful thrust. A grunt exited his mouth that was mixed with a moan from Applejack.

“Sis… are yah really, really sure?” Mac asked in frightful hesitation. AJ slid herself forwards, then slammed her rump against Mac’s hips again, sending another powerful surge of pleasure through her brother’s groin.

“Does that answer yer question?” she asked in return. Mac gulped then nodded before starting to slowly rut his sister.

Mac’s throbbing cock slid peacefully back and forth inside his sister’s warm tunnel. As he continued his motions, the inside walls of her pussy constantly contracted and retracted, massaging his member as it offered her pleasure.

“Oh Mackie… this feels wonderful.” Applejack moaned. The younger sister started rocking her hips in fluid motion with his gentle thrusts, adding to the pleasure and producing a slick squishing sound.

As Mac continued, AJ felt a building pressure in her stomach area and began to thrust a little harder against her brother. His member continued to drive deeper and deeper into with each consecutive thrust, driving her wild with the building pleasure.

Mac continued to delve himself into his sister’s soaking vagina, each thrust nearly toppling him over the edge. “Sis…” He nearly trembled as he spoke. “I’m… I’m gonna…” He trailed off as he tried to get a grip on his orgasm, trying to hold it back just a little longer.

AJ was relentless, simply not replying and continued to slam her hips into Mac’s. Mac grunted just as his cock started to swell. The end of his shaft flared out and his thrusts became erratic and jerky.

“A…AJ…” Mac groaned before one final thrust. His hips locked forwards, and he sunk his head into his sister’s mane while he endured his orgasm. His first jet of cum sprayed the inside of his sister’s cunt, mixing with her own love fluids.

He thrust himself deeper and blew a second load of cum. As his thrust took up whatever room was left inside of Applejack’s snatch, their fluids were pushed out, oozing from AJ’s entrance and dripping down to the grass below.

The feel of her brother cumming inside kicked Applejack into her orgasmic state. Her knees locked up as her entire body stiffened. She could feel his hot sticky semen lace her insides while her walls clamped down and tried to milk him for every last drop.

Her front legs gave out and she fell face first into the ground, continuing to relish in the feel of her brother’s twitching cock inside of her, filling her to the absolute capacity, and then finally overflowing.

* * *

Evan’s perspective…

My eyes went wide as I realized something terrible. “OH SHIT!” I gasped as I dodged my body to the right. Mac’s cock flared and then the first jet of cum spurted out, only traveling to the end of his hindlegs, but the second spurt launched several feet, flying right at me.

The spooge skewed off my left shoulder, where my face had been only fractions of a second before. “Eww… what the fuck,” I swore as I tried to wipe away the disgusting goo from my shoulder.

Mac let out a deep sigh before looking to me. His eyes went wide in shock. “Ah, ah’m sooo sorry. Ah didn’t mean tah-” he began, but I cut him short.

“Mac my friend… can I call you my friend?” I asked seriously and he nodded. “This is one of those times that we never speak of ever again… in fact, we don’t even remember it and, if it ever comes up, we force it from our minds,” I told him. He nodded quickly. “Okay… well… good talk,” I said in a very scarred voice.

We both stood up. “Yeah, good talk… friend,” he said, then offered to shake my hand with his right hoof.

“Uhh… no… that’s the hoof you were masturbating with,” I told him. He looked to his hoof then noticed the spooge on it. I offered him my left hand, which he graciously shook.

“Okay… now let’s go on our way like none of this ever happened,” I told him. He nodded and I grabbed my rifle. As my thoughts returned to what I had been doing beforehand, I noted that I still needed to reconcile with two more mares. Lassie, probably having no clue what just went on, yipped happily before prancing around my feet as we began to walk to our next destination, the hospital…

Author's Note

Now I know what a lot of you are thinking "K, the truck thing was just messed and weird." But now think of where this character thinks. He believes Twilight to be his mom, so sex with her would be to him, what the whole truck thing was for you guys and gals, just a very awkward boner... or for women... I'm not sure what women experience during arousal... wetness I suppose? Sorry, Im not familiar with that stuff.
Oh and before I forget, have a good one eh!

Chapter 15

‘Oh yeah… electricity…’

It was getting pretty late and the sun had already set. As I reached town, Lassie had become tired, so I had dropped her off then decided to use Cadence to commute.

My diesel rig pulled up in front of the hospital and I spotted that carriage that I had rammed a while back. It had been refurbished, but I could still make out where I had smoked it.

A very fine looking stallion was getting into the driver side while, whom I presumed to be his daughter, got in the passenger side. His daughter… was Diamond Tiara.

“Oh boy…” I trailed off and looked away in subtle amusement, tipping the brim of my hat down to conceal my eyes from view. They drove off and I made sure they were far enough away before stepping out, that way Tiara wouldn’t recognize me, or hopefully not recognize me. I was the only person in Equestria, along with the fact that Cadence was also one of a kind.

I stepped towards the hospital before thinking to myself. She had been pretty scorned and I bet she was still bent about the whole ordeal. I grabbed some roses from the flower bed and the thorns stabbed into my palm.

“Ow… what the fuck,” I swore, and then remembered: roses have thorns. “Figures,” I muttered before entering the hospital with a handful of roses. Redheart gazed over to me, her head drooping as she let out a sigh.

As she trotted over, she readied a pen and clipboard. “Do I even want to know what happened?” she asked hesitantly. I just shrugged.

“I dunno. I’m here to see Rainbow Dash,” I replied. She raised an eyebrow while looking at the roses I had picked.

“She’s in room twelve,” Redheart replied and I nodded before proceeding down the hallways. Finally reaching the door marked ‘12,’ I entered without even knocking.

“And Daring Do used the stalactite lever she had made to bust open the cell doors, freeing herself from captivity!” Dash read aloud. Huh, I had no idea that she liked reading.

“Following the trail of destruction that the big ape creature had caused, she arrived in a secret cavern that…” She trailed off, looking away from her book and spotting me looking to her with raised eyebrows.

“I didn’t know you liked to read,” I said with a small chuckle. “You’re really good. You could put a foal to bed with that kind of voice.” I spoke truly and calmly to try and calm her down from whatever scornfulness she might have.

“Meh, I don’t take notice. Hey have you read the new issue of Daring Do yet?” she asked excitedly and I raised an eyebrow. ‘Daring Do had a story book franchise about her?’ I thought before shaking my head.

“Drat… well, I’m partly way through, so if you don’t want me to spoil it then you might want to leave pretty soon,” she told me before quickly delving back into the book.

“Nah… I don’t read Daring Do books,” I informed her honestly and her mouth went agape as she gasped.

“What do you mean: ‘you don’t read Daring Do books’?! They’re like… the best stories EVER!” she exclaimed and I just rolled my eyes as I teetered my hands like a weight scale.

“Meh, I already met her in real life. She wasn’t all that great,” I informed the mare, who now scrunched her nose in confusion.

“What do you mean: ‘met her in real life’? She’s a fictional story book character,” Dash told me and I was at a loss of words.

“Wait… what? Are we talking about a different Daring Do? I met the one who’s an adventurer and is at odd’s end with Rufus,” I asked.

“No, his name is Rucus. And yes, Daring is an adventurer, and she’s only like… the coolest character EVER!” she replied and I was still confused. I just shrugged the thought off before handing her the roses.

“Here, uhh… I picked these for you,” I told her and she looked at me bluntly. “Uhm… yeah…” I trailed off, not knowing how to approach this.

“Roses and flowers are a better approach for a mare like Rarity,” she told me, setting a note tab on the page she was on before setting the book aside. The title read ‘Daring Do, and Leggit’s treasure.’

I thought to myself briefly before things clicked together. “Uhm… in that story… is there like a pirate, err, dead pirate with lots of treasure and stuff?” I asked and Dash nodded.

“Yeah, he crashed his ship a long time ago and Daring just found the cave where she thinks it is,” she informed me. Things started piecing together even more.

“Did she meet a big guy and lock him in a cell thinking that he was working for Rufus?” I asked and she again scrunched her nose, then facehoofed.

“Rucus, not Rufus. And nooo, she didn’t lock away the bad guy. The bad guy locked away her and she was totally trapped then used a stalactite from the roof along with a stone to make a lever so she could break down the cell door in the cave,” Dash told me.

“WHAT?! Okay, for starters, Daring tricked me into going into that cell. Then SHE locked ME, in the cell and said she was going to leave me for dead,” I exclaimed and Dash raised her eyebrow.

“Uhm… What?” She was so lost in my outburst and I had been so steamed that they had portrayed Daring as the good guy that I had forgotten to explain things to Dash.

“Oh uhh… okay, so I met Daring in a cave-” I began, but Dash cut me off.

“You realize that Daring is just a fictional character right? She isn’t real,” Dash told me and I groaned as I tried explaining things to her.

“No, she’s really real! I met her in Ghastly Gorge and we found Peg-Leg’s gold-” But again, she cut me off.

“Okay, for starters, she isn’t real. And secondly: she didn’t have a sidekick. Thirdly: she was looking for Leggit’s gold. And fourthly: She wasn’t looking in Ghastly Gorge for Leggit’s gold,” she interrupted me and I let out an annoyed groan.

“No, really, she’s really real. I met her in the cave but she thought I was working for some guy named Rufus so she locked me in a cell and said she was going to leave me for dead-” But once again, Dash cut me off.

“Okay… let’s pretend Daring was real. She wouldn’t lock you in a cell and leave you for dead. You’re one of the good guys. And Daring would never do something like that unless it was to a really, really bad guy,” Dash replied and I became frustrated with the mare.

“She didn’t know I was a good guy, she thought I was the bad guy. SHE locked ME in the cell, not the other way around,” I said as I grabbed the book and skimmed to the part Dash was at.

“Hey! I was reading that!” Dash exclaimed and I simply waved my hand at her as I skimmed through the story.

Rather than depict what actually happened, they mostly just reversed what had happened with Daring and I. Except there was a few major differences. The character that was supposed to portray me was nothing like me. He was a big, grumbling ape that barely spoke anything intelligent and was just a dumb brute. Daring had tried to escape off the ledge of the cliff, but the thing tackled her and clung to her back, restricting her wings. Finally, the ape tried to steal the treasure from Daring’s saddlebags, but he slipped and fell to his death.

“Okay… that is a load of crap. I wasn’t THAT, insane. She had left me for dead after wrongly accusing me of stuff,” I stated and Dash was still dumbfounded.

“Uhm… are you feeling okay? Do you want me to call a nurse?” she asked. Finally accepting the fact that Dash wouldn’t accept the truth, I simply shook off the topic.

“Never mind about that. I came here to ask you something really important. It’s been bugging me for a while and…” I trailed off as I sat next to her. She gulped as her eyes went wide.

“Uhm… you’re not asking me out on a date… are you?” she asked hesitantly.

“What? No! Why the hell would you think that?” I asked and she wiped her brow with a ‘phew’.

“Well… the roses for starters, then add the fact that you were acting really mushy just before you… uhm… acted weird,” she informed me.

“No, I’m not asking you out on a date. It’s a little more important than that,” I told her. She connected eyes with me and I spoke my mind. “I need to ask you about Tristan-” but before I could finish, she simply looked away.

“I’ve got nothing to say about him… well, except that I hope he dies a painful death somewhere in the middle of nowhere with nopony to mourn or bury him,” she replied bluntly. Weird, her reply was probably the closest to the thoughts I had about him. Everypony else was a little skeptical about killing.

“Right… and what about me?” I asked, and she looked to me with a stunned look.

“What about you?” she asked and I repeated my question. “Uhm… I thought you weren’t asking me out.”

“I didn’t mean it like that. I meant, do you think less of me now because I didn’t kill him?” I asked and she shook her head.

“No way! What happened was a slip up. Just because a pony, or… human, can’t kill somepony, no matter how bad that pony is, I wouldn’t think any less of them,” she explained and I let out a relieved sigh.

“Anyway, enough about him. How are you?” I asked and she sighed while extending her wing to show me the bandages.

“Derpy got off lucky, just some bruises. I got a busted wing bone,” she informed me.

“Why not take a healing potion?” I asked back and she just sighed.

“Ha, I wish. Healing potions don’t heal broken bones unless its just a minor break. Mine’s fractured. Don’t worry, I’ll be good as new pretty soon.” She had a good set of enthusiasm, I’ll admit that.

We sat and conversed about useless things for a long while, mostly about the Wonderbolts. She was super thrilled about finally getting into the academy and becoming a captain of a flying team, along with several other things. Finally, as the clock struck 8:45 PM, I sighed.

“Well Dash, I should be going. I still have another pony to see before the night is up,” I informed her.

“Hey… psst,” she whispered then motioned me to lean in for a secret. I leaned forwards and she whispered into my ear. “If you want a chance for a date with me, next time you come in, bring some outside food,” she told me. I leaned back with a small smile.

“Well, no offence Dash, but I’m not really playing the field. But I’ll remember to bring you in some outside food next time I’m in, okay?” I told her and she hoof pumped the air.

“Come back soon then, the food here is terrible,” she stated and I snickered, only wondering how terrible it could really be. I gave her one final nod before turning to leave, but not before catching a glance at the storybook she was reading.

‘History doesn’t lie,’ I thought to myself as I left. Redheart watched me as I left and I tossed her a wave which she promptly returned.

The moon was bright, nearly enough light being emitted to the world that one wouldn’t need a lamp or flashlight. I briskly made my way over to my truck, looking to the beautiful stars as I did so.

I slipped into the driver seat and shuddered as I remembered the very disturbing fantasy I had of my truck. Regardless of the fantasy, I swiped the naughty key, then keyed the ignition before flicking the lights on.

Everything lit up and I revved the truck slightly before inserting one of my custom CDs into the radio. After Dash had explained to me that she didn’t feel scornful towards me, a feeling of comfort had been set upon me. I guess all along it was only her that I needed to talk to. She was the only one that I needed to know that she didn’t see me as a failure, because she had been the most resentful about the whole ordeal.

I was now in an upbeat mood and cranked the radio just as Bon Jovi’s ‘Have a Nice Day’ started.

I began to race towards Fluttershy’s cottage, figuring that I might as well reminisce with her as well before the night was done. My fingers tapped against the steering wheel in response to the beat of the song. Just as the lyrics started, I began to sing along,

‘WHY YOU WANNA TELL ME HOW TO LIVE MY LIFE?
WHO ARE YOU TO TELL ME IF IT’S BLACK OR WHITE?’

I’d pound my index fingers against the steering wheel as if I was a drummer, my fingers were my drumsticks, and the steering wheel was my drums.

‘Mama can you hear me? Try to understand,
Is the innocence the difference between a boy and a man?
My daddy lived the lie it’s just the price that he paid,
Sacrificed his life just slavin’ away!’

I continued to jam out like some 80s rocker as my truck threshed through the roads. I soon stopped singing the lyrics, but continued to rock like a punk metal junkie or something. As I continued on, I started going through open fields until finally I reached the forest, but still held a steady pace that was only about 40 km/h.

As I started to get closer to her cottage, I began to try and sing along to the tunes again.

‘WHEN THE WORLD GET’S IN MY FACE I SAY:
HAVE A NICE DAY!
HAVE A NICE…

“OH SHIT!” I swore as my truck careened towards a deer that was grazing. I slammed the brakes but it was too late. My truck wasn’t traveling at deadly speeds, but I still thumped the deer, sending it tumbling across the ground in a way that looked rather painful.

I quickly shifted my truck into park and got out. The deer screeched in pain as I rushed over. Its leg looked busted and it continued to bellow in pain. “Well... nothing I can do,” I stated bluntly.

For a brief moment, I thought about whether I could really kill it. ‘Am I really becoming this soft? It’s just a friggin deer. Christ if I left it, it would probably get eaten alive by a wolf or something,’ I hissed at myself for being so soft, and then grabbed my SVT-40, settling on the thought that this was simply a mercy kill. Plus I could get some good venison. God I haven’t had good meat in sooo long. The best I could get was sushi or eggs, and even that wasn’t good enough. for protein, I had to rely mostly on nuts and eggs, mostly revolving around soybeans, peanuts, walnuts, pistachios…

My stomach grumbled at the thought of some well-cooked venison meat. “Oh yeah, this is gonna be good,” I told myself as I slapped a magazine into my SVT-40 and racked the receiver.

I walked back, ready to slay the deer, when my heart lurched and my stomach twisted. A young fawn was nestling its head against the deer that I had smoked. “OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE!” I roared and the fawn stumbled back in fear, tripping over the mother.

I slung my rifle and facepalmed with a groan of failure. I had not only smoked a deer, I had smoked a mother deer with a fawn… no venison for me…

I attempted to walk forwards, but the mother deer screeched at me, attempted to stand, and then collapsing. The fawn deer tried painfully to help its mother up. ‘God… this is like something from a Disney movie and I’m the bad guy,’ I thought to myself as I continued my approach.

The doe kicked and thrashed while the fawn backpedaled. “Just chill the fuck out. I know a pony that can help you.” I tried to calm it down, but it would have no part of it. I figured that maybe, at tops, this doe would weigh about one hundred and thirty pounds, give or take, and at most a hundred and fifty, easily within my strength range. So in theory, I could just heft her up into the back of my truck with her fawn, drive her to Fluttershy’s, and then everything would be fine.

I stepped towards the doe and it started kicking at me. I paced around behind it, but it continued to kick. I tried picking it up in a similar fashion to how I picked up the stupider calves back home on the farm, namely the ones that wouldn’t willingly leave their calf pens. I reached my left arm in front of its front legs and my right arm supported its rear, resting just below its rump.

The doe screeched and bellowed while still kicking. I made it about five feet before it kicked itself out of my grip, falling to the ground and trying to erratically scamper away, but not going very far with her busted leg.

I rolled my eyes in frustration and tried again, but again didn’t make it too far before she kicked out of my arms. “Listen! If you didn’t have a stupid fawn, I’d have blown your fucking brains out! Now stay fucking still or I’ll leave you and you’re no good fawn to be dinner for the wolves!” I roared, but it didn’t help.

In my angered frustration, I grabbed her in a tight grip, hurried over to my truck, and heaved her into the back. I slammed the tailgate and looked to the fawn. “Come here buddy, come to your mom.” The fawn stayed at distance and I tried to approach it, but it darted to the side.

“Buddy, stop fucking around or I’ll break your leg,” I threatened, but still it refused. As I tried stressfully to catch the fawn, I wondered to myself why I didn’t just boot the doe out, leave them for dead, and then simply reminisce with Fluttershy.

After a moment’s wondering, I ended up figuring that would kill the purpose of talking about how I was a failure. How I came to the conclusion that leaving nature to do its thing made me bad would never make sense. In my mind, it made absolutely no sense whatsoever but for some god forsaken reason, I was still trying to be the good guy.

A nearby howl from a Timberwolf made the fawn stiffen, while making me me unsling my old Russian battle rifle. The doe bellowed to the fawn, which raced around to the opposite of my truck, then returned its sorrowful cries to the mother.

My senses struck full alert as the hairs on the back of my neck pricked up. “Time to go,” I whispered, then snuck around the truck. Spotting the fawn before it spotted me, I tackled it as gently as I could, which was still pretty rough. I gripped it tightly before tossing it into the box of my truck, it's body landing with a THUMP.

I raced as fast as I could to the driver side and hopped in, just as a Timberwolf raced at me. Before I had even closed the door, the truck was in drive and the tires were spinning. The first wolf tried to jump inside, but my boot heel explained to it why I wasn’t dinner.

“Stay,” I told it in a Schwarzenegger tone. The tires caught traction but not before another wolf leapt onto the back of my truck, scratching the new paint with its claws.

I slammed the brakes as my brows lowered in anger. My seat leaned back, I slid open the back sliding window, and then lined up a shot. I squeezed the trigger and the rifle jerked in my arms, while the receiver spat out a smoking brass casing that landed on the back floor.

The echo of my rifle from inside my vehicle nearly deafened me. My ears rang while I clenched my eyes to try and drive away the ear piercing ring.

The 7.62mm slug slammed the Timberwolf and sent it spiraling off the truck. “Dis is your stop,” I muttered, still in an undeniable Arnie accent. I leaned the seat back up, then slapped the transmission into drive before slamming the accelerator.

With the truck, I quickly lost the wolves, but now faced a new problem. The stupid fawn wouldn’t just lie down. It constantly tried to get up and out of the box. I quickly started swerving, making it fall down to the floor.

Finally I arrived at Fluttershy’s, whose cottage lights lit up as soon as my truck arrived. I stepped out just as her door opened. The shy pegasus greeted me with a small smile. “Oh, hello… I wasn’t expecting a visitor at this hour,” Fluttershy spoke in her regular, sheepish voice.

I killed the engine to my truck and motioned for her to come over. She slowly hovered over then gasped as she spotted the two deer, probably most frantic about the injured one.

“OH MY GOODNESS! What happened?!” she gasped and I replied honestly.

“I smacked it with my truck.” She gasped even louder.

“Why would you do that?!” she exclaimed and I tried to calm her down.

“I didn’t do it on purpose. I just wasn’t paying attention. I kind of thought that you might be able to help her and her fawn,” I stated and Fluttershy became even more frantic.

“Oh dear… oh dear oh dearohdearohdear…” She continued to be frantic like she always was when an animal was hurt and I snickered out a pun.

“Yes, it’s a deer,” I stated in a thick Arnie accent. She shot me an annoyed look.

“THIS IS SERIOUS!” she stated in a very serious voice, though her serious voice was like a regular pony’s normal voice.

“Okay, sorry, bad joke. So what do we do?” I asked.

“Oh… uhm… we’ll have to call Twilight, and get her to perform a levitation spell so we can get her into the care shed,” she explained.

“Or I could just… you know… pick her up and carry her over?” I offered.

“Oh, we couldn’t do that, she’d be much too heavy to…” She trailed off as I picked up the now squirming deer.

“Lead the way,” I grunted as I tried to control the fidgeting animal. The fawn quickly followed as Fluttershy led me over to her rather large shed, but it looked more like a nice house. Hell, I don’t know why she didn’t live here rather than in her house-tree thingy.

She opened the door and I entered, but my mouth went agape as red liquid dripped from walls. My eyes went wide as I was stunned from the sight before me. “Oh-my-god…” I whispered under my breath. Everything had strange décor that literally screamed ‘Gay pride’ and every wall was painted with rainbow and stars and… other things…

“Oh, mind the paint. It hasn't dried yet,” she told me before ushering me over to a bed. I set the deer down on a high quality bed mattress that was fit for a queen, or Rarity... whichever arrived first I suppose.

Fluttershy continued to murmur quiet, frantic things to herself while she bandaged up the deer. “Okay, now you’ll have to stay off that leg, or it won’t get better,” Fluttershy ordered the deer, who seemed to acknowledge her and nodded before limping itself around with its fawn.

“Did you… just… talk to it?” I asked and she nodded in reply. “Okay, just making sure I’m not seeing things,” I replied to her nod with a casual voice.

We travelled back outside and into her yard, where the moonlight spread across the ground in a beautiful way. Her long, silky pink mane seemed to gleam in the night. I took a deep inhale through my nose as we stopped in the middle of the yard.

“Flutters?” I asked and she looked up to me. “Where do you think Tristan is right now?” I asked, looking to the moon, and she gulped before replying.

“Well… oh, I don’t know… hopefully in jail somewhere.” Her reply was so subtle and shy that it was almost cute, had the topic not been so serious. My duster coat flaps dangled about just as freely as her mane as we both stood alone in the empty yard. We gazed to the stars and I asked another serious question, though I was already settled and content about the subject, I just needed to know her thoughts because… well, just because.

“Do you think that I should’ve killed Tristan then and there?” I asked in a very deep, yet very dull and basic tone.

“Oh, well… I don’t know if killing him would’ve been the best answer,” she stammered due to the nature of the subject. “Maybe Dash wanted him dead, but I’m not sure if I’d wish death upon anypony, regardless of how bad they’ve been. Anypony can change, it just takes time and effort,” she informed me. Not quite the answer I was expecting, but it did put the subject completely to rest… well, almost; it would be at rest when Tristan was finally brought to justice, but for now, it was good enough.

Fluttershy laid down into the plush grass, holding her forehooves together at her chest as she looked to the night stars in the sky. “Do you ever just… wonder?” she asked curiously and I nodded.

“All the time,” I replied.

“I always wonder if I was put on Equestria for a reason, or if it was just luck that I ended up where I am,” she spoke her thoughts, still just as cute as ever. I laid down behind her, our heads nearly touching as we looked to the skies.

“Not sure kiddo… I kinda wonder why I’m me…” I trailed off and tried to think of an explanation. “Do you ever wonder why you see the world from your body? Why it is that somehow your… soul, or whatever it is, sees from your eyes. How it could’ve been any body in all the world, an insect, a bird, anything, but for whatever reason, you are you? Do you ever wonder why it is that… you know, like: Why do I ‘see’ like this? Why is it that I am me… you know?” I asked.

She didn’t reply, probably lost in confusion by my question. “You mean like… why it is that our soul watches through the eyes of our body?” she asked and I nodded.

“Yeah… something like that,” I whispered. We continued to just lie there, watching the stars and relishing in this seemingly calm moment.

“Evan… do you love anypony?” Fluttershy asked and I was confused by the question.

“Huh? You mean like…” I trailed off, hoping for her to be more specific.

“I mean, do you love and cherish somepony... well, if you don’t mind me asking,” she asked back.

“Well sure. I mean, I try to be as good as I can and love everyone, or everypony,” I informed her.

“Oh… I didn’t mean like that. I meant… do you ‘love’ love a pony?” she asked.

“Like… intimately?” I answered her question with a question and she nodded. “No,” I replied bluntly.

“Oh.” Was all she answered with. Just ‘oh’.

“Why, is something up?” I asked and she shook her head before becoming rather quiet. Things slowly puzzled themselves together, but it took a rather long time, which was no biggie because we were just lying around in her backyard with nothing to do.

“Are you… wondering because… you like me?” I asked wonderingly.

“Oh no… oh, I don’t mean that in a bad way!” she quickly apologized but I waved my hand in understanding. “I was just wondering because… I was kind of curious,” she informed me.

“It’s okay. Like I was asking, why do you ask?” I asked and she bit her lip.

“I can’t say.” she stammered out quickly.

“Why not?”

“Because I promised.”

I nodded. “Okay, I understand a promise and I won’t pry,” I told her and we both laid back down. “So Fluttershy… how is it that you became so… talkative with animals?” I asked, changing the subject.

She began her story and at first it sounded really corny but, because I had asked, I was willing to listen. In the end, it was still pretty corny,but… it was Fluttershy, so I wouldn’t think badly of it. She was loving and caring, so most things related to her were likely to end up ending with rainbows and love and all those sorts of things.

“Do you like animals?” she asked and my nose scrunched while I thought about it. I usually wouldn’t admit it to most ponies, but she… she was different. Fluttershy was shy, timid, and caring so she might be a little more understanding if I told her the truth.

“I loved my old dog, I love Lassie…” I trailed off and thought to my old home. “I talked to the cows at work. They, uhh… they usually just asked when they’d get more food.” I snickered and Fluttershy sat up and looked to me.

“You can talk with animals?” she asked in a somewhat hopeful voice. I brought my left hand up to my face, and rubbed my eyes with my thumb and index finger while letting out a sigh.

“Uhm… kind of. Only the ones that I get to know. Like Bear and Max. They were the dogs at the farm,” I informed her. “Max was a little goofy and it was as if he had some sort of attention disorder because he never stayed doing the same thing for more than a few seconds. Bear was… Bear was a little mooch. He always managed to somehow get my doughnuts or ice-cream.” I snickered as I remembered the countless adventures I had with the two dorky dogs.

A tear came to my eye and gleamed in the moonlight. “Are you okay?” Fluttershy asked worriedly. I quickly brushed away the tear and nodded.

“Yeah, fine… just got something in my eye… guh,” I grunted and pretended to be rubbing something from my eyes.

“Some ponies think I’m weird because they think I spend too much time with animals,” she told me, then shifted and looked to me. “Do you think I’m weird?” she asked and I shook my head.

“Nah. You’re asking a guy who worked over twelve hours a day, six days a week, never taking a vacation. Add in the fact that I talked to animals… what you’ve got with animals is a gift. A beautiful one,” I replied and she smiled before returning her gaze to the stars.

“Oh, phew… I thought you might think I’m weird.” She was relieved, then she began talking about all her animal adventures. Mostly things about saving wounded animals, or exploring nature with nopony but herself.

After a while, there was a long silence that seemed to drag on and on. I waited a moment longer before turning to look at Fluttershy, only to see that she was asleep in the grass. Her mane almost fusing into the ground as she just laid there. Her chest constantly rose and fell as she breathed peacefully in her sleep.

She looked so peaceful and beautiful when she slept that I could barely bring myself to wake her. I gently nudged her, but all I got as a response was a murmur. “Psst… Fluttershy… hey...” I trailed off, then decided that I’d pick her up and put her to bed in her home rather than leave her out here for the night.

I scooped her up and walked towards the house. The night ambience was beautiful and, along with the night moonlight, things just seemed perfect. The pegasus in my arms snuggled up to my chest while still in my arms. Her flowing mane and tail felt like silk against my skin, giving my body a weird sensational feel.

I finally got her inside and to her bed. I still pondered the thought of why she didn’t sleep on that bed she had in the animal care shed. I tucked her in but she stirred in her sleep.

She still murmured incoherent things, but continued to sleep peacefully. God, there must be a rule or something that whatever she did had to be cute, because whatever she did was always adorable.

I quickly got my ass in gear, taking note of how I was acting like I was in a Disney flick. Before I got my heart set to stone, I leaned over and gave her a kiss to the forehead, then gently rubbed her forehead. “Goodnight Fluttershy, sleep tight, and don’t let the bedbugs bite,” I whispered, then stood up and went to leave.

Just as I reached the stairs, a scream echoed in the house, making me jump in shock. “JEEZE!” I gasped as I turned with my hand over my thumping chest. Fluttershy had literally shot straight out of bed with a frantic look on her face, her wings thumping loudly as she hovered in the air.

“Where’s Angel Bunny?” she asked fearfully and I shrugged, having no clue as to where her annoying little cretin was. “Oh no! This is terrible. I was about to feed him before you showed up, then with everything that happened, I forgot to!” she gasped then whizzed by me.

I heard her frantic chatter as I casually descended the staircase of her home, which was a tight fit due to my size. “Oh dear… oh this is awful… oh this is not good… oh no…” She continued to rant on about how this was terrible.

I just shrugged. “Well… what are we going to do?” I asked and she looked to me, still with an absolutely petrified face. She was probably fearful for whatever had become of her rabbit.

“We have to find him!” she gasped while grabbing a saddlebag belt, a lantern, and her small medical kit. She quickly zoomed towards me and attempted to pull me out the door with her, but she was a little on the lesser side of strength.

I slowly turned around and calmly followed her outside, where she started to examine the ground to probably look for clues as to where her missing rabbit was. I paced over to my truck, retrieved my rifle and magazine, loaded the magazine to its capacity, and then pocketed the magazine.

Rifle in hand, I began following Fluttershy around her yard, and eventually to the back yard. There was an eerie presence just before her property merged with the Everfree, and a nasty looking wire fence.

“Oh no! Angel has run off into the Everfree!” Fluttershy gasped and I rolled my eyes. ‘Oh great, the alchemist has run off again,’ I thought sarcastically to myself. Fluttershy was looking intently at the fence as I paced up, following her gaze.

“What’s up?” I asked and she pointed to the fence.

“I put this up to keep animals like Timberwolves out… I’m just wondering if it’s working,” she told me and I shrugged before handing her my rifle.

“Hold dis,” I told her in an Austrian accent before calmly grabbing the fence wire. A moment past before I went to shrug. Just as I turned my head, I felt my body stiffen and everything flashed white.

* * *

Many months ago…

Our electric cattle livestock fence had been on the fritz again and the cows were getting out. Rain poured down almost as if we were in some monsoon… okay, that might be a bit exaggerated, but it was pissing rain, my line of sight hindered to all but a few feet in front of me.

I plugged the fence in and Scott waved me over. I briskly paced over to him and he pointed to the wire fence. “See if she’s got juice,” he told me and I mindlessly touched the wire.

Nothing happened. “Nothing,” I informed him and he muttered a quiet curse before looking to the milkhouse.

“Take the extension cord and hook it into the milk house,” he ordered and I nodded. Rushing over to the pool shack, or whatever the shack was, I unplugged the extension cord and rushed back to the milkhouse.

Rain leaked off me and I was drenched. Rain water seeped from my fingers and onto the plug end of the extension cord. Water had dampened ever part of my body and I was extremely uncomfortable.

My fingers were a little close to the end of the plug as I went to insert it into the outlet. I looked to Scotty and gave him the thumbs up and he nodded back. As I stuffed the plug into the outlet, things seemed to slow down. Just as the plug entered the outlet, a little flash of electricity sparked.

My body tensed up painfully and everything seemed to turn to a red shade while my vision blurred painfully. Everything in my chest seemed to contract painfully as I gasped in pain. My body shook a little and the only thought going through my head was: Oh... I’m dying.

Some of the milk monitors flickered while I stood, getting zapped. By some act of god, my fingers fell from the plug and I stumbled back, leaning against the milk cooler with a deep inhale.

My breathing was raspy as I coughed briefly. The milk house alarms began going off as everything reset, almost as if there was a brief power outage. “Wow…” I whispered so softly that I could barely hear myself.

My chest hurt a lot as I leaned over, grabbed the plug and rammed it into the outlet socket. I looked out to Scott, and gave him the thumbs up. He turned on the electric fence but shook his head.

As he returned, I leaned against the cooler once more, still breathing heavily. He entered and looked to the milk monitor. “Did the power go out?” he asked and I shook my head.

“I got zapped by the outlet,” I whispered loud enough so that he could hear me.

“Oh… well the fence still isn’t getting enough power. We’ll have to call Colin,” he told me. I smiled. I liked Colin, he was a funny guy. Some guy from Georgian College that would do electrical work for us for free, we just had to pay for the stuff needed to fix it.

My body felt exhausted as I started feeding the cows with the power cart. My chest hurt a little, but not as much as when I was getting zapped. After feeding the cows, I sat around, waiting for Colin to arrive. There wasn’t much we could do until he arrived.

After an hour passed, Colin arrived and started conversing with Scotty about what the problem might be. After a few minutes, he determined that perhaps the ground or terminal connection with the fence was no good.

“Hey Evan, you’re taller, wanna reach up and take down the terminal box?” he asked. I grabbed a screwdriver, unplugged the box from the extension cord, and detached the box from the wall before handing it to him.

He pissed around with the fence wires for a few moments before handing it back to me. I reattached it to the wall and then plugged it in. “Well,” Scotty said, “see if she works.”

I reached up and grabbed the electric fence, but the current probably wouldn’t even kill a fly. “Nothing,” I told him. He swore under his breath and Colin rubbed his chin.

“Try grabbing closer to the terminal box. Maybe the fence is faulty,” Colin offered. Knowing nothing about how electricity worked, I took his advice and grabbed the wire closer to the box, but still nothing. I shook my head. He scratched his chin then pointed to the box, which had a flashing yellow light, signalling that it was on.

“Try grabbing the ground and terminal at the same time, see if it’s giving juice,” he snickered. Scott closed his eyes and let out a quiet laugh. I shrugged then took his advice. Reaching forward with both hands, I grabbed both the terminal knob, and the ground knob.

Just as my hands touched both plugs, a jolt went through me while everything went white, jolting my body backwards.

* * *

Present time…

I shot up with a huge inhale. Fluttershy had a very worried look on her face. “Oh my gosh! Are you okay?” she asked and I nodded, briefly recalling the memory I just had.

“Fine… just fine,” I snickered. “How many amps are in that thing?” I asked and she thought to herself before answering.

“Well… it’s not many amps, but it is enough to nearly kill a pony,” she answered, though it wasn’t a very accurate answer.

“How many?” I asked as I tried to control my heavy breathing.

“Oh… about point zero four,” she informed me and I flumped my head back with a groan. “I tell my friends not to go near it and they all listen. It’s the only fence that keeps the Timberwolves out,” she informed me before I rolled over and stood up. I had no idea how electricity effected wolves made out of wood, but I wasn’t about to ask.

I rubbed my face contently as I continued to grumble to myself. “One of these days… I’m gonna run outta lives… either that or I’m just gonna let myself die,” I mused to myself and Fluttershy gasped.

“Oh please don’t die! That would be awful,” she pleaded and I stifled a snicker.

“I was joking,” I told her before taking my rifle back. “Alright kid, the fence is working. So let’s go find you rabbit,” I told her and she hummed into the air and over the fence.

“Oh, sorry, I forgot you don’t have wings. The generator box is over there,” she informed me. I walked over and turned it off before crawling under the fence and following her into the forest.

“So… why do you care so much about this bunny anyway? I know you love every animal, but I’ve noticed that you love Angel the most,” I asked and she immediately responded with an answer I wasn’t quite expecting.

“Oh, Dashie gave him to me as a birthday present when I was younger and I’ve cherished him ever since.” And the answer did make sense. I could see why she would cherish it so much, even if it was a little spoiled shit that ran off and put us through hell and back.

I gave her a playful nudge. “This time, let’s try not to end up in the hospital.” I laughed out a crude joke and she nodded seriously.

“I’ll try my best,” she said courageously and I just rolled my eyes. I put on my most serious face as I paced along with my rifle, Fluttershy leading the way. The gun, despite the weight, felt rather light in my hands. I guess all those months of working out have really paid off.

As we continued through the forest, a rather large mosquito looking thing began buzzing around my head. I tried constantly to swat it away, but it was very elusive and managed to easily outmaneuver my hand.

I spotted a nearby circular spider web that was quite large. I stopped just inches away from it and waited for the insect to land on me. Fluttershy, having not taken notice of my stopping, simply kept hovering forwards.

The giant mosquito buzzed around and finally landed on my neck. I quickly slapped it, but not hard enough to kill it. Instead, I held it against my neck, then grabbed it and placed it on the middle of the web.

The unique stickiness of the web kept the giant nuisance stuck. “Gah… help me!” it screeched in a very annoying tone. ‘Ech… it can talk,’ I thought to myself. “HELP ME! AHHHHH!” it screeched again, but I saw little vibrations in the web.

Before I could make a quipy comment about having him for dinner, a grotesquely large black spider crawled down the web. It had a giant purple triangle on its abdomen that took my immediate attention. “No! Please! Save me!” the bug screamed, but the spider’s face split open into giant mandibles just before it sunk its giant, jagged fangs into the mosquito’s rear. The bug gurgled as it started to get sucked up. It almost looked cartoony. The rear of the spider began to inflate as it sucked up the mosquito. After all the internal juices were sucked away, it left only a dried up carcass. The spider spat something green at the dried up skeleton and it started to dissolve, almost like its spit was corrosive acid.

The spider let out a creepy hiss that sent shivers down my spine. “FUCK YOU!” I yelled, raising up my SVT-40 and squeezing back the trigger.

The rifle rocked in my hands as the receiver was hammered back, ejecting the spent casing. The muzzle brake on the end of the rifle flashed as gases burst from the end of the barrel, along with the expelled 7.62mm slug.

The abdomen of the spider ruptured, splattering about in a gooey spectacle that looked more like it belonged in a '70s Sci-Fi flick. The smoking brass casing fell to the ground, but the front half of the spider was still active. It hissed at me then scurried away before I could finish the job.

I shook off the heebie-jeebies that the spider had caused but then realized that I had lost Fluttershy. “Fluttershy!” I yelled out, but I got no response. “Oh for fu…” I was cut off as I heard her call back.

“OVER HERE! HURRY!” she screamed… she was screaming like a normal pony screamed. My senses flared into overdrive as I rushed through the forest like a bat outta hell. My duster coat flapped and constantly got entangled with undergrowth, branches and small trees.

In moments, I burst into a clearing, where Fluttershy was with her bunny by her side. “What’s wro…” I stopped just as the hairs on the back of my neck prickled up. Time seemed to slow and I just knew something bad was about to happen. I lept to the left just as something whizzed by with tremendous velocity. I pulled myself into a roll, then shifted my feet and pivoted into a crouch as I spun around.

The creature I was facing was a rather large… somethingorother. It kind of looked like a really big coyote… or maybe a wolf. It had long, curved, pointy spines protruding from its back that ran along the trail of its spine.

The creature looked to have thick, powerful hindlegs, along with powerful, yet a little less bulky, front legs that had nasty claws on the tips of its toes. It had a muzzle full of razor sharp teeth with two nasty looking canine teeth.

Its eyes were yellow and catlike, while its fur seemed to resemble more along the lines of a canine: long and slicked back. It curled its lips, snarling like a wild beast. “Fluttershy… fly away!” I ordered, but she shook her head.

“I can’t,” she whimpered and I stole a glance at her as she showed me her back, which was scratched up pretty badly along with several bite marks in her left wing.

I looked to it and returned a snarl of primitive nature. “You hurt my friend… big mistake,” I told it, but it probably didn’t understand. The beast darted forwards at incredible speeds. I lifted my heavy rifle and popped off a shot.

The rifle shot echoed in the night as a bullet slammed into the beast’s shoulder, but its momentum kept it on track. The nightmarish animal lept at me while I brought my rifle up as if to cross block it.

The creature tackled me and snapped at my neck. I gripped my rifle tensely and grunted while I tried to push the thing off. Drool slobbered down at me as it snapped and growled, trying angrily to bite at my neck and finish the job. Its body thrashed around violently, the only thing separating us being my almost ancient Russian battle rifle.

I let my right elbow cock and the rifle’s balance tipped to that side. Just as the animal rearranged its attack strategy, I pushed up hard with my right, sending it flying off me.

I rolled to my belly and went to leap up, but the thing was fast as lightning. I screamed out in agonizing pain as something sharp and painful bit into my right side. The beast got a hold of me with its front paws and scratched away while it shook its head, trying to tear me apart.

I squirmed in its grip, managing to pull my bowie knife from the hip sheath. I didn’t have much coordination and would’ve liked to stab it through the skull, but only managed to hit it in the shoulder.

The beast fell back, hissing in pain as it gripped the knife handle with its teeth and ripped the blade from its shoulder. Flicking its head to the side, it tossed away my knife which fell several yards away from us. “Round two?” I asked and the beast pawed at the ground angrily.

The rifle jerked aggressively but I only managed two shots this time, each non-fatal wounds. The first struck near where I had hit with my knife, adding a third bleeding wound. The second shot merely skimmed off its opposite shoulder.

The beast pounced so fast I could barely react. I tried to bring my rifle across my body to protect myself, but the thing was unpredictably quick. It managed to break through my defense, tackling me to the ground with brutal force.
It lunged its face forwards to try and get my neck, but luckily I saw it coming and managed to shift my head to the side. As it went for a second bite, my left hand clenched and slammed a powerful swing across its nasty face, phasing it for a brief moment before it sunk its teeth into my forearm. Pressing down hard with its front paws to keep me pinned, it started to stare directly into my eyes with a petrifying gaze.

“GAH!” I roared as it began to bite harder and then… it started sucking. It felt as if my blood was being sucked out by something like a very large powerful needle. I tried to thrash, but its powerful jaws stayed locked on my arm.

“GET AWAY FROM HIM!” Fluttershy screamed just as a large tree branch whacked it in the head. For a brief moment, the beast released its hold on my arm and I brought my feet up between our bodies, then kicked it away.

“Hurry, get up!” Fluttershy screamed. I was hoping that she would’ve run off already, but I guess I was lucky that she had stuck around. She may have just saved my life. HA! Just my luck, the shyest and most timid pony in all Equestria saves my ass, who would’ve thought?

I went to stand up but, just as I did, the nightmarish hell creature tackled Fluttershy and went for the kill. I lined up a sloppy yet quickly placed shot and fired. The round struck in the creature’s rear end, toppling it off Fluttershy.

I fired again, this time hitting its left chest. The beast screeched out a pained vocal note then darted for me, completely ignoring my nearly defenseless friend. As the beast lept, I jammed my rifle barrel forwards, stuffing it down the throat of the beast as both our bodies got pushed to the ground from the momentum force.

The beast squirmed as it tried to get my rifle barrel out from its throat. I took a brief moment to think up a pun, then stared at it with a serious look. “Eat dis,” I told it in a Schwarzenegger tone while I squeezed the trigger. The back side of its neck was blown out in a gush of blood as the rifle blasted out a jacketed soft point round, courtesy of Flim and Flam.

The animal immediately went limp just before I shoved it off. Blood littered my body, some from the beast, and some from my own wounds, which were looking pretty grim.
Fluttershy limped over, Angel by her side. “You…” I moaned out groggily, pointing at Angel. “You’re a little shit… you know that?” I asked with an exhausted tone.

“Oh dear, you’ve lost quite a bit of blood! Hurry, we have to get you back to my cottage so I can fix you up.” She had a very relaxing voice, and despite her worried tone, it set me at ease.

“On one condition…” I murmured and she looked to me in a frantic way. “No tetanus potions…” I trailed off with a painful snicker before standing up and retrieving my bowie knife.

* * *

Monday, April 8th, 2014, Ponyville hospital…

Well… Dash was happy, mostly because I had brought her in some Twinkies from my truck which she stated: tasted a billion times better than the hospital food.

I’d second that. The hospital food was pretty nasty, mostly some kinda broccoli soup that was mostly just water. Then there was the nasty salad and jello dessert. The salad, I will admit, didn’t taste bad, but it was just plain lettuce that tasted a little dry. The jello stuff… it had bits of soft vegetables in it, so it was pretty horrid.

Both Fluttershy and I had been administered healing potions just moments after we had entered the hospital, since we were in pretty bad shape.

Now… well right now, Fluttershy, Dash and I sat in the same hospital room, just waiting to get released.

Good news, Fluttershy and I were going to make a full recovery. Bad news, we had to wait a few days before we were allowed out, because apparently they wanted to make sure our tendons and stuff weren’t damaged. Add the fact that I was going to need a tetanus, again… well I suppose things could’ve been worse.

“And then Daring Do was like ‘I don’t think so you savage!’ and totally booted the blood thirsty ape through the captain’s cabin wall! And then she tried to fly away with Leggit’s treasure, but the ape was so blood crazed that it grabbed a cannon and actually carried it around, then tried to chase her down!” Dash exclaimed. I smiled from the last part. Even though they had made me the supposed bad guy in the book, at least they didn’t make me a slouch. In fact, it was as if the made my character super powerful.

“And then, just as Daring was about to fly off and get away, the ape lept through the air and tackled her over the edge of the cliff! But the ape was holding her wings so she couldn’t fly away. So they were struggling for a moment before the ape tried to steal the treasure from Daring’s saddlebags, then slipped and fell to his death!” Dash squealed, explaining to us what had happened in the story she had recently read.

I leaned back in my hospital bed with a sigh. I looked out the window to the sunny noon skies with a smile while Dash and Fluttershy continued to converse. My right hand reached over and grabbed a pen and paper from the nightstand and I began constructing a note to Twilight.

Dear Princess Sparky,
Sometimes, when things happen that are really bad, and you can’t stop them, you might think that others see you as a failure, making you fall into a state of depression. However, if you just ask them of their feelings, then you might be surprised with the results. I have learned to always ask others of their feelings before making assumptions of them.

Your faithful student,
Burdy.

Author's Note

Right, sorry for the wait, just been busy lately. So best regards from Burdy, and I hope you guys have a nice day, or night, whichever the case may be... eh. There, I said it.

Hearth's Warming

‘Christmas it is…’

December 24th, 2013, 7:30am…

I laid on the bench, the heavy weight bar above me. I took in a deep breath as I pushed upwards, defeating gravity and the heavy 230lb weight bar.

My muscles burned in report of my action but I pushed past the pain. “No pain… NO… GAIN!” I growled. Finally, my arms locked to full extension and I slowly set the weight bar back on the resting posts.

“New record,” I muttered to myself as I rubbed my biceps attentively. Standing up, blood rushed to my head and made me wobble a little. Looking to the mirror, I brought both my arms up and flexed, admiring my new look. “Damn… I wish I had this kind of time to waste back on earth,” I told myself before doing some stretches.

A faint aroma caught my senses and I sniffed the air. It smelt like… gingerbread? I shook off the smell but it continued to plague me. I looked to the side to see smoke fuming under the space between the door and the floor.

Eyes wide with fear, I rushed upstairs, praying that the house wasn’t on fire. Bursting through the door, I spotted both Twilight and Spike, waving some oven mitts about to try and blow away the grey smoke.

Twilight noticed me and smiled brightly. “Well at least now I know how to make you come out of that hole of yours,” she teased, but I was not amused.

“I thought the house was burning. Just wanted to make sure you guys were okay,” I said. Now having seen that everything was okay, I turned to return to my previous exercise.

“Oh wait! Evan!” Twilight called and I stopped in my tracks. ‘What in Celestia’s name did she need me for?’ I thought before turning around with a nod.

“Since you’re up here, maybe you wouldn’t mind helping Spike and I cook some cookies,” she offered and I shook my head. “Oh come on, it’s that time of year. Please?” she pleaded and I tilted my head.

“What time of year?” I asked and she rolled her eyes.

“Hearth’s Warming, silly!” she laughed and I groaned. “Oh don’t be like that. It’s one of the most wonderful times of the year,” she explained with great enthusiasm.

“Ugh… and there’s like… a Santa Claus that gives out presents, right?” I asked, rather unamused by the fact that Equestria had a Christmas.

“Kind of. In Equestria we just refer to her as Hearth. She was the mare that kind of started the idea of giving gifts on Hearth’s Warming. You see, she-” Twilight began but I cut her off.

“I’m good. On earth we had a holiday like this, except it would’ve been tomorrow,” I told them but she nodded.

“Oh well, it will be tomorrow. Today is just Hearth’s Warming Eve. Spike and I were making cookies and a gingerbread house,” she explained and I just rolled my eyes. Things here never seemed to get any less corny. ‘Hey I got a great idea! Let’s make a gingerbread house, YAH!’ I thought to myself, mocking Twilight’s voice in my head.

I turned to leave again but spotted a Christmas tree, or I guess it would be Hearth’s Warming tree… and there were presents under the tree. For whatever reason, Spike and Twilight had both gotten me a gift. ‘God I feel like a douche…’ I thought before placing the palm of my right hand over my face.

“Oh for the love of God…” I muttered. “Yeah, okay… let’s make some cookies,” I mumbled. Twilight’s squeal of happiness made me shiver a little, not because her squeal was weird but because… well, she was squealing that I agreed to make cookies.

“This is so great! I can’t believe we get to finally do something together!” she exclaimed before pulling me into the kitchen. There was a bunch of cooking ingredients along with utensils, cooking books, and other things needed to make Christmas… err, Hearth’s Warming cookies.

“So Evan, what were you planning to do for Christmas?” Twilight asked and I shrugged.

“I dunno. It kind of snuck up on me,” I stated and Spike spoke up.

“Is that why you haven’t gotten us any presents yet?” he asked, making me feel even worse. Twilight gave him a scornful nudge before hissing at him.

“Spike! Sssh!” she hissed at him and he shrugged.

“Sorry! It just kind of slipped,” he apologized quickly but the comment still plagued my mind. He had a point, even if he hadn’t meant to make one. I needed to get them each a present, but I had no money to do so.

Twilight spoke up and interrupted my thoughts. “Well, if you wouldn’t mind… maybe you’d like to spend Hearth’s Warming with us?” she asked and I let my eyes go wide as I gave a half assed shrug.

“Well… seeing as how we live in the same house, why not?” I replied.

“Well, that’s not exactly what I meant. We can have breakfast together, open presents, cherish each other’s company… if you wouldn’t mind,” she offered hopefully and I simply nodded. She grabbed me and hugged me tightly, getting cookie dough onto my shirt.

“Thank you Evan! This means the world to me,” she cooed in happiness and I simply let out an exhale.

“What are sons for?” I asked rhetorically. We continued to make cookies for another two or three hours before finally deciding that we had enough. Twilight went to wash up and I looked over to Spike.

“I uhh… gotta go out for a while. If Twilight asks, I’m just… uhm… yeah,” I stammered and Spike nodded. I paced down to my room and walked back and forth across the floor while I dressed myself for the cold winter weather.

Though it wasn’t much, my camouflage battle jacket and cargo pants did a half ass decent job of keeping me warm. “What the fuck am I going to do?” I asked myself before slipping on my boots and preparing to leave.

As I made for the door, Spike stopped me, a medium sized back of cookies in hand. “Here,” he offered but I shook my head.

“Thanks but no thanks kid. I’m not really hungry,” I told him but still he persisted.

“You might get hungry.” I rolled my eyes, took the bag, and pocketed them with my thanks. He smiled brightly but my returned smile wasn’t as enthusiastic.

“Goddamn Christmas. It can’t just be about remembering Jesus or something, nooo! It has to also be about presents and shit.” I scowled to myself as a chilly breeze blew past me. Fuck it was cold, and windy too.

I made my way to the back of my truck and retrieved my darling Applebloom, a few stripper clips of ammunition, and a belted saddlebags. Strapping on the saddlebags, I placed the ammunition into the right side bags but not before loading ten fresh rounds into my rifle. I looped my belt through my hip sheath and strapped in my bowie knife, just for safe measures.

“Maybe in the summer we’ll go riding Cadence,” I told my truck. I went to go on my way, then noticed the bag of cookies in my coat pocket. I removed them and looked to the sugar cookies with a blunt expression. The cookies mostly resembled stars and trees. With a sigh, I placed them into the left saddlebag, seeing as how it was more comfortable that way.

The temperature probably reached a chill of -20 degrees Celsius, making me want to cut my trip short. I refused to give up though, knowing I would feel even worse come Hearth’s Warming if I hadn’t gotten Spike and Twilight a present.

With my rifle strapped across my back, I began pondering the thought of how exactly I was supposed to get a present for each of them anyway. I had absolutely no money and wasn’t the stealing type.

Younger fillies and colts played in the streets, throwing snowballs at each other and building snow forts. I spotted a few snowmen… or I guess in this world they would be snowmares or something like that.

In my thought, I wasn’t paying attention to my path and accidentally knocked over a young colt playing in the snow. “Shoot… sorry kiddo, I wasn’t looking,” I apologized, helping the colt to his hooves. He brushed himself off and began to turn to me, already accepting my apology.

“It’s okay. My mom tells me not to play in the road anywa…” He trailed off as his eyes went wide. His jaw slacked open and he looked up to me, lower jaw shaking in fear. He let out a scream and rushed off, leaving me alone by myself.

I continued along, sometimes catching a glance at store windows, other times having ponies steal petrified glances at me. God, I feel like a loner.

I continued around town and eventually found myself in the middle of town, looking to the massive Hearth’s Warming tree which was nearly done in its decoration. “Funny… even back on my world, people, or ponies, kill a tree then display its corpse before decorating its dead body with ornaments,” I snickered a very crude and dark joke before shaking my head.

I turned around and began walking to the opposite side of town. Everywhere I walked, there were ponies enjoying themselves… or maybe they were enjoying the company of others… lucky bastards.

I soon found myself on the outskirts of town. The wind picked up and began blowing snow into my face. Bringing my right arm up to shield my face, I turned around to make my way back into town, but the snow was so fierce that I could barely see three feet in front of me.

Hell, the snow was so bad that I couldn’t even see my goddamn feet. ‘Well this just makes my day wonderful… ‘cause it’s the most wonderful time… of the year,’ I thought sarcastically.

My exposed hands began to feel nippy while my fingertips themselves became numb. My feet felt terribly cold inside my steel toed boots, the steel toes themselves doing nothing helpful except conducting the cold.

My face quickly became uncomfortably freezing and my nose began to run. “Try to get gifts for my family members: die of pneumonia,” I muttered, still holding my right arm across my face to try and shield my eyes from the gusty snow.

I continued back towards town, constantly muttering curses to myself, before something caught my foot and I tripped. I cursed to myself as snow stuck to my face. I looked up from the deep snow and snickered.

“Ben… BEN!” I groaned jokingly, then wiped off my snow covered face and stood up. If I stayed out here any longer, I’d probably end up like Skywalker on Hoth. I went to look for my footprints to see which way I had come from, but saw that they had been completely erased in the snowfall.

“Oh shit…” I whispered. Things were starting to look grim now. I had no sense of direction with the snow the way it was and with the temperature so low, my cargo pants and light battle jacket did nearly nothing to protect me from the elements.

“At least I still have my rifle,” I assured myself. Though what little good having a rifle did me in a snowstorm, it still made me feel better just having it. I began to walk in one direction. Theoretically, if I travel far enough in one direction I should either hit Ponyville or the Everfree, or even just a tree to hid from the immediate wind would suffice until the storm died down.

As I continued along, my enthusiasm quickly died. I was no longer thinking about getting presents for Spike and Twilight, but rather thinking completely about how to survive.

“Fucking cold… fucking snow… fucking Equestria… God I hate this place,” I whispered to myself, just before the wind started blowing even harder. “FUCK YOU!” I roared, but my voice was quickly drowned out by the whistling winds.

My face started to burn in freezing pain and I just had to stop and use both my arms to cover my face. I slid my arms across each other and into the opposite sleeves to keep my bare hands relatively protected.

Without warning, a powerful gust of wind blew me down and onto my back. I quickly unsheathed my arms to try and get back up but a ghostly figure appeared as the snow was cleared from around them.

“Who the fuck are you? Jack Frost?!” I snarled angrily.

“Child, your body is filled with so much hate right now. Relax and-” he began but I quickly cut him short.

“Fuck off with your stupid relax and look on the bright side bullshit! I don’t need it!” I roared but his face simply remained straight, not even deterring for a moment.

“Child, if you wish to find sanction, you must relax and look into your soul.” Just as he said that, his body turn into a blinding patch of gusty snow that blew into my face, blinding me and sending my body into unconsciousness.

* * *

Earth, December 25th, 2012…

I quickly shuffled the pan, flipping the scrambled eggs about while at the same time monitoring the frying bacon. I shifted gears and quickly poured some eggnog into a glass for my brother.

I turned off both burners and scooped some eggs and bacon strips onto the plate just as the toaster oven dinged. I quickly opened the small oven door and removed the hot pieces of toast with my bare hands and buttering them up with a butter knife.

My uncle, Justin, scooped some fried potatoes out of his frying pan and we quickly made up a few plates for my brother, my grandma, my uncle, and myself.

The four of us sat down and enjoyed a rather brief Christmas breakfast. My brother was fastest to finish and quickly sat up, washed his plate and utensils then was nearly bouncing on his heels in excitement.

“Can we open presents now?!” he asked in absolute excitement. I had no real idea of why he was so thrilled; he knew exactly what I had gotten him, or at least the present I had gotten him that he wanted.

“Get Mom up first, she’ll want to see you open the presents,” I told him. He quickly rushed down stairs and, just as quickly as he had gone down, he came back up.

“She’s wasted,” he informed me, to which both my uncle and I groaned.

“I fucking told her not to be drinking,” my uncle growled and I shrugged.

“I’ll go get her,” I muttered and stumbled down the stairs. I approached my mother’s room and didn’t even bother knocking as I entered. She had some really weird décor, mostly hippy stuff, but it sure beat the decorations of Iron Maiden that she used to have.

Shivers went down my back as I remembered the ‘Fear of the dark’ poster she used to have on her door. That friggin’ tree troll thing scared the shit out of me for the longest time, and to this day continues to creep me out.

I went up to her bed side and gave her an aggressive shake. “Hey! Hey, wake up!” I told her, but all I got in response was a drunken mumble. “Hey, your son wants to open presents, so get up there and see him on Christmas morning!” I told her in a stern voice.

She waved a hand at me and nodded with a drunken stupor smile. “Yeah… yeah, I’ll… I’ll, I’ll be right up,” she stuttered heavily, still intoxicated from the long night of drinking before.

“Whatever, just get upstairs if you want to see your son unwrap his gifts,” I told her then proceeded back upstairs.

My brother looked to me and I shrugged. “She’ll be up momentarily,” I snickered, knowing full well that could take hours.

I flopped down on the couch and put on ‘South Park Christmas Specials.’ Uncle Justin sat down as well and the three of us enjoyed the vulgar cartoon while my grandma sat in the kitchen, saying the cartoon was too ridiculous for her.

My stepdad arrived shortly after we had begun watching the cartoon and sat down, a Tim Horton’s coffee in hand.

After over an hour and a half, we were nearing the end of yet another episode. The Jewish boy, Kyle, had lost his brother to the original parents because of some new law passed in Canada where the parents could take the child back if they wanted. So the foursome had travelled to Canada in an attempt to get the brother back. At this point, they were following ‘The only road in Canada’ with their new friend, The Mountie, who was riding a sheep due to yet another new and suspicious law in Canada.

As they met the French Canadian who missed his wine, my mother came stumbling up the stairs, only making my uncle shake his head in shame. I paused the movie and shut off the TV as my mom came into the living room.

Her hair was frazzled and messy and her breath reeked of alcohol. My grandma stayed in the kitchen and simply watched from afar as my grandfather took a seat in his chair in the living room.

My mother flopped down on the other couch and I merely shrugged to my brother. He began searching through the pile of presents, looking for his while at the same time handing presents to others.

I had no real interest in my presents but rather the presents I had gotten my brother. Most were just simple things like BBs for his pea shooter or CO2 cartridges. Of the gifts I got him, there was one that I wanted to see his face for, because it was the gift he kept bugging me to get him.

I watched him intently as he opened present after present but he’d constantly stop and ask if I wanted to open mine yet, but I’d constantly reply with: “I will in a second.”

After another few presents, he finally got to the one I wanted to see him open. It wasn’t large by any means, and was rectangular and thin, much like a DVD case. His eyes went wide and he quickly ripped the wrapping off then squealed.

“OH MY GOD!” he screamed as he held Red Dead Redemption. Though it was released in 2010, I had never bothered getting a PS3 until 2011, and still had never bothered getting many games.

A smile crept across my lips as he opened the other present that I had also gotten him. He ripped that open with haste as well and continued to squeal in delight. It was a box of five hundred and twenty five .22 Long Rifle rounds.

Though I was only 17 at the time and laws restricted people from acquiring ammunition until the age of 18, I had my ways. I looked over to my mom who had a sway in her body.

I just shook my head and looked back to my brother as he started opening more presents, these were from my uncle Justin and were relatively the same as mine: Video games and ammunition.

* * *

December 24th, 2013…

I awoke abruptly with my face painfully stinging. “ARGGG!” I yelled in pain as I quickly placed my icy hands to my face. Things were bad… really bad. I stood up and wobbled a little as I got my balance.

“Easy now. Man instinct says town is… that way!” I announced and pointed in a random direction before heading that way. I had no idea where I was headed but I needed to find shelter and fast.

“Stupid Hearth’s Warming… I hate holidays,” I muttered. I thought about what I had just said then turned back on it. “I guess I don’t really hate the holidays… just this shitty, miserable day,” I whispered.

Wind continued to whistle past my burning cheeks as I tried painfully to cover my exposed face with my arms, but it was futile.

“Is that why you haven’t gotten us any presents yet?” asked a very familiar voice from behind. I turned to see a faint image of Spike through the snow.

“Spike…” I groaned and tried to pace towards him as deliria started to set in.

I tripped and fell but managed to keep my head above the snowy ground. “Uhm… hi,” he introduced himself to another image that looked big, tall and… it was me… kind of. The other figure was me.

The ghostly version of me simply didn’t reply and continued to work out. “Spi-i-i-ike… SPIKE!” I tried to call through the wind but my voice was lost. As I crawled through the snow, my eyelashes became frosted, making it hard to keep my eyes open.

“Evan, I love you,” called another distinct and familiar voice. I looked to see Twilight standing before me.

“Mom… Mom, I love you too,” I replied, but she must not have heard me. Her eyes began to tear up.

“I love you so much, don’t you understand?” she asked and I nodded. Standing to my feet and stumbling over, I tried to hug her, but her body disappeared into the storm.

“Mom… MOM I LOVE YOU!” I screamed to her but another gust of wind knocked me down. “SCREW YOU, STUPID SNOW!” I roared but an unbelievably powerful gust of wind tossed me across the ground.

Snow burned into my flesh as blood started to seep out of my cracked skin. “ARRGGG… I HATE YOU!” I roared at the snow, completely furious at the elements of nature.

I stood up and let out a fierce roar that managed to crack through the storm. Suddenly a path of the storm in front of me stopped and a massive… uhm… it was a horse of regular size, but it was comprised entirely of snow.

It’s eyes flashed a fiery blue, sending shivers down my already freezing body. I clenched my hands and grimaced painfully. It leaned its head back and spewed an icy breath forwards.

A vapor trail expelled from its mouth and skewed towards me before I could properly move. I turned my body to the left and I felt something painful burn my face, causing me to scream in agonizing pain and fall to the ground.

The whole right side of my jacket and pants had been frosted but it had saved my skin. However, the right side of my bare face had not been spared. Ice frosted my skin, killing my nerves and nearly rendering my right eye useless.

I screamed loudly as my right hand immediately grasped my face, but it didn’t feel like skin anymore. It felt more like I was touching crispy ice. Gasping as I stood to my feet, the ghostly horse beast sucked in for another breath.

My right hand snuck behind my back and unslung my SKS rifle while my left hand was already moving to my right side. Just as I lined up the rifle, my left hand racked back the receiver block and let it slam shut, chambering a round.

Just before the beast could manage another breath, I blasted off all ten shots in the magazine. Smoking brass was tossed about as the rifle ejected shell after shell, spitting shot after shot into the beast with deadly intentions. The muzzle flash was horrendous and frightening, but was quickly swallowed into the snow. The chatter of my Russian rifle echoed in the storm, a symbol of its might.

Snow puffed where the bullets struck and the beast shrieked before disappearing. I fell to my knees, cringing in sheer pain as my nerves reacted to my frozen face. I’d probably need amputation or something.

In an instant, my right hand darted into my saddlebags and retrieved another loaded stripper clip. I stuffed the rounds into the internal magazine before racking the receiver. I left the gun loaded, seeing as how that would be the least of my worries.

I began pacing through the snow, rifle in hand, but only managed a few steps before the creature returned, blasting me to the ground with a gust of wind. Frost crisped onto the chest of my jacket but didn't manage to penetrate enough to damage my skin tissue. I landed on my back and noticed the beast preparing another breath to finish me off.

I rolled to the side and could feel the icy breath spew onto the spot that I had been just moments before. I finished my roll and laid flat on my back. “Eat metal!” I whispered out a pun before jerking on the trigger. The gun chattered and rattled aggressively in my arms as the rifle chewed through the magazine’s capacity.

Puffs of snow erupted from the beast’s body as bullets riddled it, but it quickly disappeared in a burst of snow. Without hesitation, I reached into my saddlebags and retrieved another load of ammo.

In a flash I had the gun loaded and ready. Just before I could get up, it appeared just above me, already ready to spray its icy breath down upon me. Without using the sights of the rifle, I simply tilted the rifle up and chattered off several shots.

It’s face ruptured into puffs of snow but one lucky shot glanced its left shinning eye. The beast shrieked as the eye cracked and then shattered apart. It swung its head around in pain before turning to me. A smoke of snow emulated from its busted eye socket before a loud shriek of pain echoed in the air and its body dispersed into the storm.

I pulled the receiver partly way back and saw the orange military shell casing still locked onto the receiver. I let it slam shut. “If you bleed… I can kill you,” I whispered in a thick Austrian accent.

I readied myself, knowing exactly what to do, but I wasn’t quite expecting for what came. A figure appeared in front of me and I went to shoot, only to be stopped when I realized it was Twilight.

“Mom! What the hell are you…” I began but was cut off as she blew out a gust of wind that knocked me to the ground, slipping the rifle out of my frozen hands. I gasped in pain, grasping the backs of my hands which were cold and icy, but not completely frozen.

Before I could do anything, the giant horse snow thing lept on me, holding me down. “Do you hate?” asked a deathly voice. Its head lowered down and the steam vapors from its nostrils crisped frost onto the unfrozen side of my face. I winced as my nostrils cripsed with tiny icicles.

I tried to move but the beast must’ve weighed a ton. “Say that you hate… we feed off it,” the creature stated, but I still grimaced as I tried to move, remaining silent. “SAY IT!” It’s voice echoed in the storm and the sheer force of the scream blew away the snow from underneath us, creating a crater in the snow.

I squirmed underneath it but all I could move was my arms and legs, not my body. “Say that you HATE!” it screeched and a thought came to mind. I put on a straight face while my right hand clenched.

“Freeze in hell,” I told it in a thick Arnie accent. My left hand skewed across my waist and removed the massive bowie knife from its sheath before darting it up towards the creature’s face.

I cocked my elbow then drove the blade tip right into its remaining good eye. The blade tip cracked the eye, almost as if I had struck a layer of ice. The beast screeched in horror and my right arm snuck out from the hold it had me in.

The palm of my right hand slammed the knife handle’s base, driving the knife into the final eye and shattering it like a glass orb. The monster bellowed and fell back, thrashing on the ground as electric bolts of energy began shooting out from its deteriorating body.

As the beast finally perished, I muttered out a cheesy pun. “No more reindeer games for you,” I spoke with a perfect Arnie voice that made me snicker a little after the serious pun.

I stood up and retrieved my rifle but nearly fell over as my injuries started to take effect. “Damn… what a terrible Christmas… Hearth’s Warming Eve,” I whispered. I kept my rifle in hand as I stood up and began to wobble in a single direction.

I kept a serious face on as I tumbled around, constantly muttering things to myself in an Arnie voice to try and keep my morale up. As I stumbled along, I stumbled across a mare in a green, puffy jacket.

I only held my rifle with my right hand but got ready to draw it on a second's notice if I had to. “Who the hell are you?” I asked and her attention immediately shifted to me. She was fairly young, maybe late twenties at most. Her fur was white along with her mane and tail. The only way I could tell where her mane started and fur ended, was the sparkling gleam of her mane.

She had a horn so I guess that made her a unicorn. “Oh don’t mind me, for I am but a weary traveler,” she stated.

“Bullshit. You’re too finely dressed and groomed to be ‘just a weary traveler,’” I told her and she smiled with a slight blush.

“Well I appreciate your compliment, but my clothes are just old rags that I have patched together myself. And my mane and tail are only tended to by nature,” she informed me. I wasn’t about to let my guard down, but I had this hunch that she wasn’t about to kill me.

“Okay… Weary traveler, what the hell are you doing here?” I asked and she shrugged.

“Merely passing through. The weather is beautiful today,” she replied and I scoffed.

“Pfft, yeah, and I’m the queen of England,” I said sarcastically.

“Who?” she asked curiously and that’s when I remembered that ponies didn’t know who that was.

“Never mind,” I told her and she nodded. I grimaced as my face burned in pain and didn’t notice her turning to leave.

“Well, it was nice meeting you, Never Mind-” she began but I interrupted her.

“My name isn’t Never Mind, I was just saying never mind. My name is Burdick, Evan Burdick, but yah can call me Burdy if yah fancy,” I informed her, returning to my natural voice and discarding my Arnie accent.

“Oh, well Burdy, as I was saying, it was nice meeting you, but I must be going. I am very hungry and am in need of food…” she trailed off and looked to me with wandering eyes. “The last pony I came across would not share his meal. If you have anything and would be so kind, I would be most appreciative,” she asked hopefully but I simply sighed.

“I’m sorry. I don’t have anything,” I replied and she sighed before nodding and turning to leave.

“It is okay, I understand,” she stated and began trotting to leave. I cursed myself for not having brought provisions, not for myself, but if I had then I could’ve…

“WAIT!” I yelled, but she kept trotting away, not even slowing a little. I started to run forwards, stumbling and nearly losing my balance due to my burning injuries, but I quickly caught up with her.

“WAIT!” I yelled, grabbing her by the shoulder and spinning her around. Her eyes went wide in shock but I didn't return a facial expression, my frozen face hurt to much as it was “Here, take these!” I offered, pulling out the cookies that I had forgotten about and handing them to her.

“I thought you said you had nothing to share?” she asked and I fumbled around for an answer.

“Well I thought I didn’t have anything, but a friend of mine gave me these just before I left, so I forgot that I had them. Please take them, you probably need them more than I do,” I offered.

“Maybe not. Your body is very cold,” she replied but I simply snickered.

“Yeah but…” I winced in pain then continued, “sugar cookies don’t heal severe frostbite,” I snickered.

“That isn’t all that funny,” she said in a serious tone, but I shrugged.

“I can’t fix what has already been done, so I might as well make some kind of crude joke of it,” I laughed but she shook her head.

“Thank you for the cookies, perhaps we could share them?” she offered but I shook my head in return.

“Nah, you have them all. You said you were hungry after all,” I told her. She smiled brightly and the storm seemed to settle, though now I came to the realization that I was in an open snowy field that was near a forest and there was no sign of civilization to be seen.

“Perhaps we should find shelter before the storm returns,” she offered and I didn’t complain as we quickly paced over to a nearby cluster of trees. I set my rifle against a tree then flumped down against the trunk and crossed my arms. Now that the wind was gone, I could see my breath. The back of my hands stung while my face... it was just a painful kind of numb.

“You know… you’ll probably be the last one to see me alive. Do me a favour and tell my mother that I love her. Her name is Twilight and she lives in-” I began but she cut me off rather quickly.

“Your mother is Twilight? As in, Princess Twilight Sparkle?” she asked and I nodded, another breath of air escaping my lips. “I didn’t know she had a son,” she said but I shook my head.

“I’m not blood related, but she’s my mom of sorts. Just tell her that I love her,” I replied and she nodded. My breathing had slowed significantly and it hurt a little to breath.

“What were you doing out here anyway?” she asked and I chuckled.

“I was trying to find her and Spike, my friend, some presents. I was flat broke so I didn’t know what to do, then I got caught in this storm. Guess my plan backfired…” I trailed off and started hacking violently. Calming my breathing, I let my lungs take deep and heavy breaths, though now my breathing was raspy.

“So you came out looking to get gifts for others?” she asked and I nodded. Looking down to the cookies I had given her, then back to me, she smiled. “You are truly generous, and that is a good trait,” she offered me comfort in my dark times, but I simply muttered another crude joke.

“A trait that is likely to kill me,” I laughed and she gave me a cross face. “Okay…” I hacked up another cough, then got settled. “Thank you for the compliment. And if you wouldn’t mind going to Ponyville to tell Twilight-" I began to hack again before looking to her with serious eyes. "Thank you,” I thanked her and she smiled.

I leaned my head back, letting my eyes close and the darkness and cold swallow me. Things, despite the pain and freezing cold, were starting to get nicer. I knew it was bad to fall asleep in the cold, but right now it was the most comforting thing to do.

Before I could do anything, the snap of a branch awoke me. I looked to see the white mare piling some branches. “What are you doing?” I asked tiredly.

“You helped me without asking for anything in return. You came out here to get a gift for a mother and a friend. I will help you in your time of need as a gift for your generosity,” she informed me and I nodded, my eyes droopy and tired.

“Thank you…” I whispered, trailing off from exhaustion. With a pile of branches made, she lowered her horn and a white blast, that almost looked like a gust of snow, hit the branches and ignited them into a burning flame.

“Come closer and be warm,” she offered. I shuffled forwards and extended my shaky hands forwards, trying to get warm. My new friend, or whatever I should address her as, nibbled on the cookies I had given her.

“Do you wish to have any?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Thanks but no thanks. I’m not very hungry,” I replied, my body shaking as my nerves tried to determine whether I was supposed to be hot from the close proximity of the fire, or freezing cold from the frost that still plagued my face and back of my hands.

“I am curious. Why does your voice change from time to time?” she asked and I snickered.

“Before this… before I ended up here, in Equestria, I lived in a different place. When I was young… about six, I watched a movie. It was called ‘Terminator’ and it had this actor. His name was: Arnold Schwarzenegger. I remember when I first saw his face on the cover I thought ‘who is this weird guy?’ But I quickly fell in love with his acting and I’ve always wanted to be kind of like him. That’s why I sometimes talk like him,” I informed her and she nodded.

“So you have learned to imitate his vocal patterns? Interesting.” She smiled and continued nibbling her cookies contently. “Thank you, these cookies are delicious.” I simply nodded and continued to try and warm myself.

After several minutes, the mare trotted over and flopped down beside me, nestling close to me. “Your heart is strong and loving, and your soul is pure. Always let your heart guide you and keep your loved ones close,” she told me and I nodded.

“Uhm… thanks,” I thanked her for her compliment. She continued to nestle against me for what seemed like hours, the both off us comforting in each others company. Every so often she'd lean her head against my shoulder and doze off slightly before waking abruptly.

After waking from a slight nap for the thirteen of fourteenth time, she looked to me with a genuine smile. “I must be going, but know that the fire will keep you warm and that the storm shall not return. You can sleep if you wish,” she offered and suddenly a set of angel-like wings sprang from her sides, snow sparkling into the air around her.

“You’re… an alicorn?!” I gasped in shock and she nodded.

“Most would immediately help an alicorn, thinking that an alicorn is royalty and that in turn they would be rewarded with riches. I travel the world as if a simple traveler and most ponies treat me as such. However there are some that are generous enough to help a stranger in need, even if they have little to give, like you,” she told me.

“It was nothing, really,” I replied tiredly. She smiled and nodded.

“You may act tough, and pretend to be stone cold, but have faith in your true loving nature. Others will accept you for who you really are,” she offered me some advice before turning around to take off. I briefly noticed that her cutie mark thing was a white star, the kind of star that belongs on top of a Christmas tree. She cocked her legs then shot off, taking flight and shooting off into the sky.

I suddenly realized that I had never gotten her name and cursed myself for not asking more about her. I snapped my fingers and muttered a curse before lying down on the dry ground.

I watched the flame flicker brightly in the night. “Damn… Hearth’s Warming is tomorrow…” I muttered silently and continued to watch the warm flickering fire. As time dragged on, my eyes slowly began to shut for longer periods until finally I could no longer keep them open.

The warmth of the fire enveloped my entire body, keeping me warm against the harsh winter cold. Even though the ground was hard, it was rather comfortable and there was nothing I could do to keep myself from dozing off several times.

However, just before I could completely fall asleep, the crackle of the fire would awaken me. Eventually my exhaustion completely took over and I didn’t even remember falling asleep…

* * *

My mind remained subtle and peaceful while a voice above me squealed in delight. “It’s Hearth’s Warming! It’s Hearth’s Warming! Come on Twilight, get up!” squealed a young voice.

My eyes shot wide as I gasped. A pool of saliva had formed in my mouth and caused me to gag. Gasping loudly, I quickly shot my hands for my face. Feeling soft skin and sideburns, I let out a deep exhale that was more of a relieved sigh.

My eyes quickly darted to my black watch and I snatched it off the nightstand. The watch arms were busted, as they were since the day I had bought it, but the digital readout was always bang on.

It read that it was… 7:58am, 25th of December, 2013. But if that was a dream then… what happened to yesterday?

I scratched my head and figured the day had probably slipped my mind and that I had probably just done a lot of upper body workouts yesterday.

“WOAH! Twilight look! Hearth was here!” Spike’s voice squealed loud enough that it sounded as if he was right beside me.

I rolled over and stayed underneath the warm blankets and that’s when I noticed it. I was wearing my battle jacket. I never wore my battle jacket to bed… heck, I barely wore anything to bed but my boxers and now I was sleeping in full dress.

Without dwelling on the subject, I stood up and sat out of bed. My rifle, knife, and saddlebags were nowhere to be seen, probably in the back of my truck where they belonged, so that meant that I had simply had a weird dream.

Remembering that it was Christmas… Hearth’s Warming, I decided maybe I’d go upstairs. I didn’t want to be the black sheep that gave a bad feeling to Hearth’s Warming day.

Pacing up the stairs, I entered the living quarters and Twilight looked over to me with a smile. “Good morning Evan! Happy Hearth’s Warming,” she told me and I smiled. It sounded weird to be said like that, but to them it was probably normal.

I gave her a nod and looked to Spike. “So, Santa get you anything good?” I asked and he raised an eyebrow.

“Who?” he asked curiously and I stumbled for the words.

“Uhm… you know… the one who gets you presents?” I asked and he nodded.

“Yeah! Hearth got me like… four presents this year!” he exclaimed.

“Spike,” Twilight began in a parenting voice, “breakfast first,” she ordered and Spike moseyed into the kitchen with a frown. Before I could follow suit, Twilight stood to her hindlegs and grabbed me by the shoulder and pulled my head down before whispering into my ear.

“How did you afford all of that?” she asked and I raised my eyebrows in curiosity.

“I didn’t get that stuff,” I replied and she rolled her eyes.

“Of course you did. I didn’t get it and I know Spike didn’t get it. It wasn’t there last night and you weren’t home yet… speaking of which, never do that again. I was so scared that you were hurt! If you’re going to stay out late to pull a surprise, just tell me,” she ordered and I was lost.

“Uhh… can I just… use the washroom before breakfast?” I asked then quickly rushed into the bathroom and looked into the mirror. My face looked absolutely normal. My facial hair looked unchanged and nothing looked to have suffered frostbite like in my dream but… if I didn’t come home until late… I don’t even remember coming home.

Without another thought, I went into the kitchen and sat down. Breakfast was already made and was eggs with fried potatoes and toast. I ate, but not too much, still pondering the thoughts that plagued my mind.

With breakfast done, Spike was already edging for the presents while Twilight and I slowly made our way into the living room. “Okay Spike, you can open yours now,” she stated and Spike immediately grabbed a present and ripped it open.

I could tell it was a faked smile as he looked to Twilight. “Thanks Twilight. I really like Dragon’s Might,” he thanked her for the book she had gotten him. He began to open several other presents from her, mostly just socks and pajamas, all of which he was only subtly happy with.

He took out a larger present and opened it. “WOAH! NO WAY!” Spike gasped and held a box that contained… well, I wasn’t sure yet because Spike was ripping it open. Twilight leaned over and again whispered into my ear.

“How did you afford that?” Twilight asked and I shrugged.

“I don’t even know what it is,” I stated but was soon answered as a remote control carriage zoomed around. Twilight looked to me with a shocked look and Spike lept on me with a tight hug.

“Thanks, this is so cool!” he squealed and I just gave a confused smile. He gasped then hopped off. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to touch you,” Spike apologized.

“It’s okay kid. I think for one day of the year I can handle it,” I laughed whole heartedly. Spike continued to open presents before he handed me two, one from him and one from Twilight.

His gift was rather large with a little envelope. I opened the envelope and saw a picture that was rather terribly drawn but the intent was crushing to my stone heart. There was a picture of Spike and I, weightlifting together. A deep breath of air escaped my lips, draining my lungs of oxygen as I gave a silent gasp.

I gently set the picture aside. As rock hard as I liked to be, this was just one of those things that could probably make me cry, given the right moment. I opened the present to be surprised by a radio.

“So you can listen to music when you pump iron,” Spike informed me. A smile crept across my face as I patted his head with my hand.

“Thanks kid, it means a lot,” I told him, still smiling. I looked to the present from Twilight. There was no envelope or note, just a tab that read ‘To: Evan, Love: Twilight’. I opened it up to find a rather large hardcover book.

The cover had some bulky, muscle-y goat-like man-thing with horns. The title read ‘Iron Will’s, iron will’ with the lower statement reading ‘Proper workout techniques and fast muscle building!’

A smirk crossed my lips. “Thanks Twi. How’d you know?” I chuckled. It wouldn’t have been the first thing on my wish list but, since it was from her, it meant a lot. She just shrugged with a smile before Spike handed her a present.

“Here Twi, this one’s from Evan,” Spike offered. Her horn lit up and she began to unravel the well wrapped gift. Hell, I wasn’t even good at wrapping gifts. Under the wrapping was a cardboard box which she opened, and then gasped in shock.

“Oh my Celestia… Evan!” she gasped and I was still confused.

“What?” I asked and she looked to me with shock.

“What do you mean: what? You know full well what!” she gasped and held forth a crystal pegasus that had her angel wings splayed wide and an angel halo above her head. “It’s beautiful, I love it.” She held it, admiring the beauty.

I will admit, the thing looked cool and all, because it was like a disco ball and shined in all different directions, giving it a real godly look, but in all truth it wasn’t a huge deal to gasp about and be in shock.

“Where’d you get this?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Ah dunno,” I replied honestly. Truthfully, I had no idea how it got there. I looked to the radio and smiled. This was probably the one time of the year I could let myself be mushy and not hate myself for it.

“Spike, see if my radio works,” I offered, trying to quickly change the subject. He nodded and quickly plugged it in before fidgeting with the controls. A note dropped from the inside of my coat. Somehow I hadn’t noticed it before.

Twilight didn't notice as I reached down and picked it up. There were red cursive letters that read ‘Evan’. I opened the letter and read it in my mind.

Dear Evan, or as you like to be called, Burdy,
I wish you the best regards on Hearth’s Warming day and hope you have a wonderful time with your family. You have one of the purest hearts I have ever known. Evan, when meeting a complete stranger, you offered her what little you had and asked for nothing in return. I hope that one day others will follow your generous ways. I apologize for leaving so abruptly and in the midst of everything I didn’t get to properly introduce myself, and I hope that one day we meet again.

Best wishes,
Hearth, xoxo

I folded up the letter and placed it back in the envelope before gently placing it into a coat pocket and removing my jacket. Musical tunes played in the air and reminded me of a song from back on my world, except this song was sung by a mare with something more like a harp or maybe a lyre.

‘Oh the weather outside is frightful,
But the fire is so delightful…’

Twilight nudged me. “Evan, if you wouldn’t mind,” she offered and I looked to her, her hoof extended towards me.

“What?” I asked, wondering what she need.

“Hearth’s Warming is only once a year and I know you’re pretty solitary, but… if you wouldn’t mind, could you dance with me just this once?” she asked. I scratched around my neck and sighed.

“Alright Mom, but I’m not very good,” I replied, but she shrugged off my warning.

“Don’t worry, I’ll teach you.” She giggled playfully. Standing to her hindlegs, she balanced herself and used me as a sort of support. “Okay, take my hoof in your right hand,” she began, offering me her left hoof.

I followed her instructions, gently grasping her hoof in my hand. The music continued to play in the background while she instructed me on how to dance. “Now take your left and place it around the back of my waist.

I followed her instruction and placed my left around her back, about midsection. “A little lower,” she told me and I nodded, moving my hand a tad bit lower. “Mmm… a bit lower,” she said, and again I lowered my hand, now near the curve of her lower back.

“Lower still, by my hips,” she said. I gulped and followed the instruction. She nodded then placed her right foreleg over my arm and wrapped it around my back. “Now if this is correct, just follow my lead,” she informed me.

“Do you know what you’re doing?” I asked as we started.

“Kind of,” she replied. The answer was good enough I suppose. We slowly danced, sometimes losing our footing and stumbling about, but for the most part it was alright… all things considered. I wouldn’t admit to feeling this way about dancing, but I guess I wouldn’t mind doing it again, if for good reason.

Spike raced around with the new RC carriage that… had mystically appeared and stated that I had gotten it for him. Maybe that mare Hearth that I had met was actually like Santa Claus, or maybe it was all a big coincidence or… oh hell, thinking about it just made my head spin.

As song after song played, Twilight and I continued to dance. Eventually Twilight paused, looked up, and then looked back down to me. “Evan…” she whispered, trailing off.

“Yeah?” I asked and she didn’t tilt her head up, but motioned with her eyes for me to look up. I looked up to see some flower thingy dangling from a string. I looked back down to Twilight who was looking at me with her pretty purple eyes that seemed to gleam. “What?” I asked, dumbfounded, not sure what she wanted me to see.

Maybe it was the flower. “Do you want the flower? I can reach it if you want?” I asked but she shook her head.

“It’s mistletoe,” she informed me and I looked up to it with a raised eyebrow.

“Huh… so that’s what those look like. I’ve only seen crude pictures of them, but never saw them in real life…” I trailed off and examined it further. It had green leaves with little white ball thingies. It was truly interesting, seeing as how cartoons and stuff usually display them as a couple green leaves with some red cherry looking ball thingies.

“Do you know what mistletoe means?” she asked in a different, almost dreamy voice.

“Yeah, the…” I trailed off as I realized the two of us were standing under it. Looking back up to it and rubbing my chin, I murmured things to myself. “Indeed… well then… now that’s interesting… I see…” I finished rubbing my chin and looked back down.

Spike was off somewhere and I just sighed. “Evan…” she trailed off as she started leaning towards my face with hers. ‘Okay, one time of the year, I’ll kiss my mom on the lips,’ I thought to myself before leaning down to kiss her back.

Her eyes slowly started to close as our lips neared one another. I followed suit and my eyes gently shut closed. It was weird, I will admit. Kissing my mom on the lips was a bit awkward, but I guess I could live with it.

Our lips touched, but not just for a brief moment. She pressed her lips against mine with passion, my arms naturally curled around her back, holding her close to me as her forelegs did the same to me.

The feel of her wet lips against mine made me feel all mushy and warm inside. After several moments of our embrace, we parted our lips and she smiled with a blush. “I love you,” she whispered and my heart felt weird as she said it. That was probably one of the creepiest things you can say to your son after kissing them on the lips like that.

“I love you too Mom.” We continued to hold each other in a hug, but I snuck my hand up and pulled down the mistletoe. The last thing I needed was for one of her weird friends to come in and catch me under the mistletoe with them, or worse yet, get caught with Spike.
I stuffed the mistletoe in my pants pocket then continued my hug with my mom. She rested the side of her face against my chest as I breathed slowly. Her embrace made me feel warm... and loved.

Author's Note

So I'm working tomorrow (So that my boss can spend time with his family, yeah go figure I volunteer to spend my Christmas working so others can enjoy themselves, guess that makes me too good to be true, which is a Mary Stu which would make me an awful person, anyway...) I figured I'd give this to you guys tonight in case I don't get time to tomorrow. So *Tips cowboy hat* Merry Christmas to yah'll from Burdy.

Chapter 16

'Oh buddy… I’ve always wanted to do this…’

Tuesday, April 9th, 2014…

So even though I was under the effects of the tetanus potion stuff, things couldn’t be better. I was in an upbeat tone, everypony was feeling better… I couldn’t really ask for more, well, maybe to be home, but beggars can’t be choosers.

I slowly, and casually, heaved a pair of dumbbells as Spike stood beside me doing a similar workout, though he had tiny weights at my request. He had constantly bugged and bugged me, so I finally agreed to let him workout, though he had to take it really easy. I probably couldn’t live with myself if he was hindered in some way because I let him hurt himself.

My boner throbbed in need of release, but my muscles burned more, taking all of my attention. After a while longer, my hands simply released the dumbbells, which fell to the ground with a clang.

Spike gently set the small weights down and looked to me. “So what now?” he asked curiously and I shrugged. My stomach answered my question with a grumble.

I clucked my tongue and briefly remembered all those times that Scotty and I would have Timmies before morning milking at the dairy farm. “Mmm… I’m feeling like a doughnut would be good… a dozen actually, how bout you?” I asked and he scratched the side of his head.

“I dunno. I guess we could go to Tim Horsetons,” he informed me. I nodded, pocketed a few dozen bits, then didn’t even bother putting on a shirt as we began to race out of the library.

All I had on was my regular camouflage cargo pants and work boots, going topless. Spike raced with a pair of gym shorts and a tank top. I let him lead the way since he knew where this place was. Oh buddy, I could taste the doughnuts now...

We eventually reached a small establishment with a big sign that read ‘Tim Horsetons’. I snickered at how closely the place resembled a Tim Hortons and we quickly entered. I looked to the large variety of goodies and treats, and I could tell Spike was doing the same as our mouths watered.

“Aren’t trans-fat and glucose not good for fitness?” Spike asked but I shrugged and looked to the young mare who was operating the cash register. She was kind of pretty I suppose. She had light brown fur, with a dark red mane and matching tail while her eyes were a pretty green.

“Spike, what do you want?” I asked and he pondered in his thoughts.

“I guess… uhm… a muffin please.” He had manners, I’ll admit that.

“Four muffins and a half a dozen doughnuts please,” I told the cashier who checked it through. The final bill was… thirty two bits?

I shrugged off the thought and tossed her a pouch of bits. “There’s thirty four in that. Keep the change,” I told her. She nodded and immediately grabbed our things, and handed me the receipt.

Spike and I sat down at a table near the window and dug in. Unfortunately, she had mostly just given me plain doughnuts with only one chocolate dip, one honey glazed, and one jelly doughnut.

Spike had gotten three carrot cake muffins and a banana muffin… lucky bastard. I began to ponder why the hell it was so expensive then looked to the receipt. My eyes went wide as I realized that there were a bunch of things I was billed for that we didn’t receive.

“Uhm… excuse me!” I called out and the nice mare looked to me. “I got billed for… three double doubles, two hot chocolates, a half dozen doughnuts, four muffins and…” I looked at the last thing that read ‘2 BELT’ “What’s a belt?” I asked Spike.

“Bagel, Egg, Lettuce, Tomato,” he replied and I nodded. At first I thought it was an actual Bacon sandwich, which would’ve confused me because ponies didn’t like killing animals.

“And two BELTs… but we only got the doughnuts and muffins,” I told her. She gasped and rushed over, looking over the receipt.

“Oh my gosh. I’m so sorry. Here, let me get you your change,” she apologized then ran back to the register. She came back and handed me twenty eight bits. I raised an eyebrow in confusion.

“Wait… no…” I stammered and looked to the receipt. “The doughnuts were four bits and the muffins were five, making nine. The bill was thirty two, so that means you’d only owe me twenty one,” I informed her.

She got flustered and began to break down in a panic. I quickly grabbed her hoof and held it down on the table. “Woah, relax. You’ll give yourself a heart attack.” I let a few seconds pass by, enough for her to calm down. “Tell you what, keep the change,” I said with a bright smile.

She let out a deep sigh then nodded with a smile, and a slight blush. “Thanks. It means a lot. I’m a little new here. My name’s Mary by the way,” she informed me as she extended her hoof.

“Burdick, Evan Burdick. But yah can call me Burdy if yah fancy,” I replied with a shake of her hoof. She turned around and a hint of arousal hit me. I peeked a glance to her flank and noticed that she had no cutie mark.

She continued forwards, a slight sway in her hips. Her movement was like a trance to me, mostly because I was hornier than a bull in rut. She rounded the counter and noticed my gaze before I did.

With a sheepish smile, her face flushed a deep hue of red. I quickly noticed how dorky I looked and coughed slightly before taking my view away from the young mare. As I turned, I noticed that Spike had eaten just about all our sweets, minus two plain doughnuts.

He was just stuffing the last muffin in his mouth as I looked to him. “Sowwy,” he gargled, his mouth still stuffed with pastry. I just rolled my eyes. So much for manners. I waved to Mary as we left and she covered her blush as she returned my wave.

Both Spike and I made our way back to the library and my young dragon friend looked up to me. “Man… I wish I could look like you. Then Rarity would definitely love me,” Spike muttered. I smirked with a roll of my eyes.

“I dunno bud. I think there’s more to winning a mare’s heart than just looks,” I told him and he scoffed.

“Yeah, sure." He rolled his eyes as he got a little pouty. "Like, every mare you talk to nearly faints,” he replied and I shook my head.

“No. Applejack doesn’t… Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Mrs. Cake, Twilight’s friend Cadence… they all didn’t almost faint,” I told him and he rolled his eyes.

“Rarity does. And that mare we just met at Tim Horsetons-” But before he went on, I cut him short.

“Okay, for starters, Mary was just blushing because I was being really nice despite everything that had happened. And Rarity… she’s just like that,” I told him and he nodded.

“Exactly! I wish she’d be ‘just like that’ with me,” he replied and I sighed. This guy had his hopes and dreams set on that mare. It was such a shame, it really was. I didn’t say anything, not sure how to comfort the poor dragon.

As we arrived at the library, a voice called over. The voice belonged to Sweetie Belle. “Hey Spike, wanna come play?” she asked hopefully and he looked up to me.

“Are we going to work out any more?” he asked and I shook my head.

“Nah. I think I’m just going to let the day pass away,” I informed him. He nodded with a smile and then rushed over to Sweetie Belle who remarked at his still tense muscles.

“Wow Spike! You look a lot stronger than you did last time!” Sweetie Belle spoke with a funny chime in her voice and Spike nodded with a bout of confidence.

“Yup! I’ve been working out with Evan. One day I’ll be as big as him and then your sister will fall in love with me,” he stated. Sweetie Belle let out an ‘Oh…’ that sounded a little… sad. The duo both dashed off into the town while I entered the library.

The lights were a little dim but I took nothing of it. “Is that you Evan?” Came Twilight’s voice from upstairs.

“Yeah. Spike’s gone out with Sweetie Belle,” I informed her. I began to sway my way towards the basement. My plan right now was that I would get that porn magazine and rub one off, and then maybe I’d take a nap or something.

“Oh, well… can you come up here?” she asked. I let out a sigh and looked up to the ceiling as if to roll my eyes. Things couldn’t just let me nap. I stumbled up the steps to her room, only to see her lying on her side, her hair frazzled, with a weird look on her face.

She had a book cradled close to her chest as she spoke in a hushed tone. “Shall we read together?” I pondered the question. I had really just wanted to jerk off then pass out.

“Ugh… I dunno." I groaned then pondered the question a little more. The story might be good. "What’s the story about?” I asked and she was thrown off balance by the question, falling off the edge of her bed and crashing down with a THUMP!

“What? Huh?” she asked as I walked over and helped her up.

“Well… you asked if i wanted to read together so I asked what the book was,” I replied then picked the book up off the floor and looked to the cover. “Sixty-Nine Shades of… Neigh?” I raised an eyebrow but she quickly snatched the book out from my hands and hid it under her wing.

“I uhh… hehe… it uhm… Rarity lent it to me and I was just about to start reading it,” she informed me and I snickered.

“Oh my god… I uhh… hear that uhh… it’s a very… descriptive book,” I told her.

“It is. It’s very visualizing,” she told me and I raised an eyebrow.

“I thought you said you were just about to start reading it?” I asked and she blushed heavily.

“I was! That’s just what Rarity said and… since I was just starting to read it I thought that maybe you’d like to read it with me,” she offered and I shuddered. I had never read Fifty Shades of Grey, but if this was like the Equestrian version, I don’t think I’d want anything to do with it.

“Uhh… uhm… I’m good,” I stuttered. “I hear that it’s a story geared more towards moms…” I trailed off and thought about how she was my mom. “I guess it would fit your persona, ey mom?” I snickered then turned to leave.

“Well actually... never mind that. Now that you’re here I need to tell you something,” she began and I groaned.

“Ugh… can I not jerk off first. I’m hornier than…” I trailed off and just left the sentence where it was.

“Oh…” She trailed off and looked down to see a tent pitched in my pants. I noticed her stare and quickly covered it with my hands.

“Yeah… they uhh… got me with the tetanus crap again,” I muttered.

“Oh…” Was all that she said.

“Yeah, so I need to jerk off, ‘cause I’m not very active in the alternative,” I told her.

“Well,” she began, “we could always… you know?” she asked and I raised an eyebrow. I waited for her to continue but she didn’t.

“No, I don’t know. Please enlighten me.”

“Well, we could…” she trailed off… well, I think she trailed off. She was getting that weird look in her eyes again. The one where her eyes seemed to sparkle as she looked into mine.

“We could what?” I asked bluntly.

“Well… you know… I could help you...” she trailed off again, slowly stepping up to her hindlegs and leaning forwards.

It finally snapped and I knew exactly what she meant. “Exactly! You’re genius!” I stated with a snap then stepped back. She fell forwards with a gasp. I quickly unbuckled my belt and slide out my stiff buddy.

“Oh… well, you certainly are straight to business,” she stammered and I nodded.

“Yeah well it took a bit of time but I finally realized it. You’re an alicorn so-” I began but she cut me off.

“What does that have to do with it?” she asked in a very confused tone and I quickly replied.

“Well, I guess a skilled unicorn like Trixie could do it to but you’ve got magic too-” But again she cut me off.

“Wait… what?” she asked and I answered her question with what she had in mind from the beginning.

“Well duh! You’ve got magic. Just cast a spell to get rid of my boner! It’s brilliant!” I exclaimed.

“Oh,” she replied dully and in a rather gloomy voice.

“What do you mean ‘oh’? It was your idea, you’re a fucking genius!” I told her in an upbeat tone, picking her up and hugging her tightly. I had sort of forgotten to do up my pants before I hugged her and my bare cock rubbed against her soft fur, sending shivers of pleasure throughout my entire body.

I set her down and stepped back. “Okay so…” I trailed off, waiting for her to get rid of my throbbing erection.

“I can’t,” she stated and I gasped.

“What do you mean you can’t?!” I asked and she answered my question with haste.

“I can’t get rid of your urges in the way you want. The only way I can get rid of them is in a way that you’d feel uncomfortable with. And I wouldn’t want to put you through that,” she told me in a still down voice.

Thoughts zoomed through my head. At first I had wanted to get off and pass out, but now I was feeling adventurous enough to find a spell to dfeat these retched erections.“Bah, don’t kick yourself over it. I know a mare that can do it,” I told her and she gasped.

“You… you know a mare?” she asked and I nodded.

“Yeah, Trixie. She’s 'Great and Powerful' after all. She’ll probably know how to get rid of this thing,” I told her as I pulled up my pants and began to rush off.

“Wait, Evan!” she called out, stopping me in my tracks. I turned back and she looked to me with loving eyes. “I love you,” she whispered loud enough so that I could hear, but in a very hushed tone.

I rolled my eyes, walked over, and hugged her lovingly. “I know Mom. We’ve been over this again and again. I love you too and you don’t have to worry. I’m not going to leave you,” I told her.

She hugged back tightly, almost not wanting to let go. After several minutes we both let go and I gave her a nod. “Don’t worry, Trixie will get rid of this for me,” I told her then rushed off.

Just as I was about to leave another thought hit me. I looked to the bookshelves and walked over. I picked out the book that I wasn’t supposed to touch. It was the one with the spell that got me here. I stuffed it into my pants, since I still didn’t have a shirt and coat on, and then left the library.

I quickly paced around town until I came across Trixie’s stage-home thingy. Without even knocking, I let myself in, only to be greeted by the sight of Trixie masturbating.

“GAH!” we both screamed in embarrassment. Her horn flared and a pink dildo slid from her juicy hole and was flung away. By some sort so accident - I hope - the dildo bounced off the wall of her small house and then hit me in the face.

Pussy juice smeared on my face and made me cringe in slight disgust, but my cock throbbed in delight. “Eww…” Was all I managed.

“Don’t you knock?!” she gasped and I grabbed a nearby cloth and began wiping my face with it. Before I was done, she pulled the cloth away and concealed herself with it. “Well?” she asked rather irritably.

“Well what?” I asked, having forgotten what she had previously asked me.

“Well, don’t you bother knocking before you enter a mare’s home?” she asked in an annoyed tone. My boner continued to twitch out of control, constantly making me want to just pull out my cock and ram her. Despite my near uncontrollable urges, there was no way in hell I was doing that, considering all she had been through.

“I uhh… need a favour and it’s really strange,” I informed her. She raised an eyebrow. “You seriously have to listen to my whole explanation before thinking anything,” I told her and she nodded.

I closed the door behind me, locking it to make sure nopony could enter. “I uhm… have this problem, see… it won’t go away,” I told her and she gulped as I pulled out my raging boner.

“I… I… I…” Trixie stammered fearfully.

“Trixie, it’s not what you think, believe me. The docs gave me some potion that gives me a raging boner and nearly uncontrollable urges. And I thought that, because you’re great and powerful, you might be able to cast a spell that would negate it,” I informed her.

She registered everything I had told her then wiped her brow with a ‘phew’. “I’ll be honest, I’ve never been asked to do something quite like that. I guess everypony else would just succumb to their urges. I’m terribly sorry but I don’t know if I could do something like that,” she replied and I whispered a subtle curse to myself.

“Well fuck… that curbs my plan to an absolute halt,” I hissed. A sly smile crossed her face as she slowly stood up. An aroma was present in the room that made it hard to think about anything other than sex.

“Well… we could always just get rid of it the old fashioned way,” she replied with a strange tone, to which the likes I had never heard from her before. Her voice, along with the aroma that lingered in the air, made my boner twitch out of control.

My left leg stiffened while my right leg jerked a little. “T-t-th-the… old fashioned way?” I gulped hesitantly.

“Well, you know silly,” she whispered, still in that strange tone that didn’t sound like it belonged to her.

“I… I don’t know,” I replied, praying that she didn’t have in mind what I was thinking… stupid urges.

She hopped up to her hind legs and pinned my immobile body against the locked door. “You could make love to me,” she whispered as she grinded her body against mine, making me grunt in forced pleasure.

“Ugh… Trixie!” I gasped as my urges were forced away by whatever mental strength I had left. I slipped out from her grip and pivoted around her. “I can’t do that to you! Not after everything you’ve been through in life,” I responded, quickly doing up my pants and belt.

Her face quickly wilted to a pouty and depressed face. “I’ve always wanted someone to love me other than my brother but… but… maybe he was right. Nopony will ever love me because... because I'm ugly.” She sniffled before tears started to pour from her eyes.

My anger skyrocketed as I was reminded of my failure with Tristan. In a fury of rage, my forehead slammed off the nearby wall, causing stars to blur my vision. She gasped in absolute shock and I turned to her, wincing in pain.

“You’re not… ugly! You’re beautiful… gorgeous… drop dead sexy… never… guh!” I scowled in anger as I dropped to my knees, my fists clenched as I roared in anger. “AHH TRISTAN!” I began to slam my fists into the floor as I constantly yelled out the ‘fuck’ word.

The whole ordeal had gotten rid of the sexual tension, but in turn it had brought about a new problem. Trixie knelt down beside me with a look of hesitancy on her face. “Do you… did you really mean that?” she asked but I didn’t look to her.

My lips curled a little as I thought about that rotten no good piece of shit Tristan. ‘When I find you… God help your soul,’ I thought silently. “About what?” I asked in a scorned tone.

“About me? Do you really think I’m pretty?” she asked and I nodded. She lifted my chin and looked directly into my eyes. “Don’t lie to me,” she pleaded. I nodded again and tears dribbled down her eyes. She slowly placed her lips against my cheek and gave me a loving kiss. “Thank you. Nopony has ever called me beautiful before,” she whispered.

I moved my face away and began to massage it with my right hand. “Ugh… what have I become?” I muttered to myself. Calling ponies beautiful, kindling together loving friendships, risking my life for talking animals...

“What do you mean?” the female unicorn beside me asked. I hadn’t quite meant for her to hear that. I pulled the book from my pocket, flipped it to the page with 'that' certain spell, and handed the book to her.

“I need you to cast a spell. I need to go back to my world to remember who I was. Maybe I’m better the way I am now and I’m just thinking that I’m worse off this way… or maybe I have become pitiful,” I informed her.

She skimmed over the spell and looked to me. “This won’t work. Even if I did complete it, how will you get back?” she asked, reminding me that I still needed to explain the entire plan.

“Not just me, you as well. That way when I’m done, you can get us both back,” I told her but she gulped.

“But what if it doesn’t work? What if something goes wrong?” she asked but I shook my head.

“It has to work,” I told her. She swallowed deeply before taking one last look at the spellbook. Setting the book down, she took a deep breath then lowered her horn, the tip pointing right at me. The room seemed to get darker as her horn began to glow and spurt out globs of magic dust.

An aura of magic swirls lanced through the room, sounding our bodies. Her eyes clenched harder and she grunted just as a blast of energy shot from her horn, split, and then hammered into both of us.

I braced myself for what I expected to be a brutal hit…

My eyes still closed, I waited for the blow that never came. As I opened my eyes, I looked to Trixie who was huffing exhaustedly. “It… it didn’t work…” she whispered in a tired tone.

I let out a sigh and shrugged. Patting her head, I flopped down beside her. “Never mind kid… it was worth a shot anyway,” I told her. She collapsed exhaustedly while I just leaned my head back against the wall. My emotions were starting to get to me again… fucking Tristan. When I found him, I’d kill him…

* * *

Somewhere in the Middle East, third person…

The massive cargo plane sat in the empty desert plains with a small group conversing near the rear of the plane.

The woman had her arms crossed as the rebel fighters observed the Cold War Soviet weapons, mostly Kalashnikov family weapons, but a few were of other designs. She stood roughly five foot six inches and had an average build.

She wore a simple pair of black cargo pants which were a little tight and hugged her ass a bit too much for her comfort. Her upper body fared no better with just a simple tank top that didn’t leave much to the imagination with her busty breasts.

Her medium length brown hair was slicked back, not interfering with her view of the rebel fighters. Her feet felt a bit cramped in her black combat boots. She bit her lip as her green eyes quickly darted back and forth between the four men observing the weapons.

“So?” she asked curiously, already getting a little edgy. She hated dealing with rebel fighters. To her, rebel fighters, Mujahedeen, Taliban… they all looked the same.

“We like,” one of the men said in a heavy Arabic accent.

“So we’re good?” she asked in a rather uneasy tone.

“No,” said one of the others as he drew out a small handgun from under his thick robes. “New deal,” he told her just as an assault rifle muzzle pressed against the back of her head.

With her attention drawn to the four fighters, she hadn’t noticed the three Mujahedeen fighters sneak up behind her. “I thought you said you hated the Mujahedeen?!” she hissed.

“We do, but not as much as Americans,” said another of the original four men. “Now stand over there. We take all guns and maybe you live,” he ordered her in basic English. She kept her hands in the air as she slowly began walking to where he had pointed.
The group began to rummage through the cargo boxes, scavenging everything they could. One of the seven fighters kept his gun trained on her but constantly looked to the group and muttered things in Arabic which the woman couldn’t understand.

She dared a glance to her right, spotting her favourite old rifle on top of a cargo box. It was an M16A2 with an M203 grenade launcher attachment. She waited another moment and the fighter once again turned to the others. She slowly sidestepped closer to the box that supported her rifle.

The Arabic man continued to yell at the others, probably for them to hurry up. As she neared closer to her gun, she stopped and readied her posture. The man looked back to her but didn’t notice anything different about her.

Without turning his body, he again looked to the others. The woman took this chance, and lept. Her body careened through the air and she planted her left hand against the top of the box and pushed hard, launching her body into something of a barrel roll, propelling her body over the box as she grabbed the rifle with her right hand during mid flight.

Pulling herself into a roll as she touched the ground, she thumped onto the sand just before racking back the charging handle on her M16. “FUCK YOU MOTHERFUCKERS!” she roared and chattered down the small group with her assault rifle. The lone chatter of the assault rifle screamed into the empty desert.

The muzzle flared as metal death was spat at the Mujahedeen fighters. They all screamed in horror as they were cut down by the single woman fighter. Letting off on the trigger, she kept the smoking rifle at hip level. “No one fucks with Kianna Magnum! NO ONE!” she shouted.

The sky quickly became dark, almost black, as thunder clouds started to form. “What the fuck is this?!” Kianna yelled as she again readied her rifle. Lightning began to strike the ground around her as thunder started to boom.

Flashes of lightning streaked across the sky in an unearthly way. Her eyes wide, Kianna made a beeline for her massive Hercules cargo plane, tuffs of dirt being kicked up as she rushed forwards.

Just before making it to the plane’s cargo area, a streak of blue lightning thrashed through the air and hammered her hard. A grunt escaped her lips just as everything in her mind went white.

* * *

Ponyville Library, Evan’s perspective…

I snuck into the library and discreetly put the book back where it belonged. Moseying around, I found myself in the kitchen and pouring myself a bowl of cereal, despite the time of day.

Eventually, Twilight poked her head into the kitchen. “So… how was it?” she asked in a sad voice and I raised an eyebrow as I looked down to my cereal.

“I dunno… it tastes pretty good, that’s why I buy the stuff,” I stated and she let out an irritated huff.

“That’s not what I meant. How was it with Trixie?” she asked in an inquiring voice that sounded like she was depressed yet scornful at the same time.

“It didn’t work, she didn’t know a spell either,” I replied subtly.

“Well… didn’t you… you know?” she asked and I looked up to her.

“How the hell did you know about that?” I gasped and she sniffled a little.

“Well… well it wasn’t… that hard…” she stammered, her voice almost cracking in sadness. “You were… having urges…” She had a hiccup and began to cry.

I was thrown way off in confusion. “What the fuck does that have to do with it?” I asked, now wondering how she knew that I had tried to go home and how exactly being horny had anything to do with that.

“Please… just don’t…” she cried, turning around and running back up to her room. I was left speechless, wondering what the hell she was so sad about. If she knew that I had tried to go home then she should know that I was going to come back after.

I let out an irritated groan, quickly finished off my cereal then paced up to Twilight’s room. Even before I could mutter out a single syllable, she was yelling at me. “I said don’t!” she wept and I tossed my hands into the air.

“Twilight, I wasn’t going to leave forever, I was just gonna go home for a little while.” But instead of getting an answer, there was a long silence that just seemed to drag on and on.

Finally she broke the silence. “What?” she asked in a confused voice and then I was thrown into confusion once more.

“What? What? Wait… what? Stop messing with my head! What do you mean: What?” I took a long pause as my thoughts scattered.

“Huh?” she asked and her question threw me even deeper into the hole. I grasped my head, not knowing what the hell was happening.

“I uhh…” I trailed off, pointing to myself. “You…” I pointed to her. After another moment my mind snapped back to my recent thoughts. “Oh yeah. I know I promised never to leave you, but I swear that I was going to come back. I just needed to go home for a little while. You wouldn’t have even noticed that I was gone,” I told her, but her face remained in a confused look.

“I… what?” she asked, probably still lost in thought. I tried to remind her why she was sad, seeing as how that was what this was all about.

“You were pissed off at me, or sad, or something, and so you were crying. But I had no idea why, but then I found out that you knew I was trying to go home and that’s why you were sad but I swear to God I wasn’t going to leave forever,” I stuttered everything out in a flash.

“But… wait, you tried to go home? Evan, what were you thinking?!” she gasped and I rolled my eyes. Now she was just mad at me. Oh well, at least it’s better than before.

“I know it was bad but I just needed to know if I was becoming pitiful or… it’s hard to explain. I know what I did was wrong but I needed to do it.” I let out a deep sigh. “Twilight, I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings like that,” I apologized truthfully. I hadn’t meant to hurt her feelings, I just needed to figure out my own emotions.

“But I thought you went over there and had sex with Trixie,” she informed me and my gut wrenched at the thought of it. As nice a mare as she was, that’s just not right.

“UGH! Twilight! Why would you think I’d do something like that? And after all she’s been through,” I partially scolded her, though not harshly. She winced slightly in innocence.

“Well… you were horny and you said she could fix it for you so I just put two and two together,” she stated and I groaned.

“Ugh… we really have to learn to communicate better so that this stuff never happens…” I trailed off as she lept onto me, hugging me tightly. I scratched my head briefly before rolling my eyes and returning her hug. I'd never understand mares... hell I couldn't even understand women and they were the same species as me.

“I just couldn’t bear the thought of not having you. Evan… please, tell me that you love me,” she whispered and I rolled my eyes.

“Man… we’ve been over this like a dozen times. Do you want me to write it on the wall?” I asked. She hugged me tighter.

“Please…” she whispered, almost in a sob.

“Yeah, I love you,” I replied in a somewhat irritated tone. ‘I guess it would be better than me acting like a douchebag son: Fuck you mom, I’m not listening to a thing you tell me to do.’ I snickered at the thought and Twilight looked up to me.

“What’s so funny?” she asked and I looked down to her beautiful eyes that gleamed with the still lingering tears.

“You,” I stated, giving her a kiss to the forehead. “We really have to start talking more so that way we don’t have any more misunderstandings.” I chuckled. The sound of the front door opening and shutting echoed through the house.

“I’m home.” Came Spike’s voice and I looked to Twilight.

“This never happened,” I told her and she nodded back with a smile.

Just before I could leave, she brought the subject up again. “Wait! Why did you try to go home?” she asked and I groaned.

“Twi, it never happened. Remember?” I asked, just as Spike entered the room.

“Hey guys…" Spike trailed off and observed Twilight a little closer. "Twilight, were you crying?” he asked worriedly but I answered before her.

“Nah, she just got a bit of dust in her eyes,” I lied and he raised an eyebrow. “We were… cleaning! Yeah, cleaning and… we found a dust collection in a place she could never reach…” I trailed off in my lie and Twilight picked it up.

“Yeah it… was behind the top of the bookshelf where we could never reach.” Twilight laughed nervously, not selling the lie very well.

“But I cleaned there just the other day…” Spike replied in a tone of suspicion.

“Well the dust must’ve built up really quickly,” Twilight lied quickly. Spike’s eyes looked from one side of the room to the other, with his right eyebrow raised high.

“Uh-huh… right… okay,” he replied then left in a state of confusion.

“I’m with him,” I added but, before I could leave, Twilight nabbed my attention.

“Actually Evan, there is one more thing,” she said and I let out a groan. “Oh, don’t be like that Mr. Mopey Pants,” she teased and I rolled my eyes.

“Coming from you, that’s hilarious,” I countered and she blushed slightly.

“Well it wouldn’t happen if you didn’t constantly play with my feelings,” she countered and I tossed my hands up in loss. Now that was pretty harsh.

“Okay, fine! I give. I’m sorry for always forgetting to tell you that I’m not actually leaving the house forever, just for the afternoon,” I told her and she rolled her eyes. ‘Oh yeah, SHE rolls HER eyes at me,’ I thought.

“Anyway,” she began, “I was thinking that, because you are my faithful student, you should learn some magic to justify that title.” I let out an exhale.

“Twilight, I’m not going to pull rabbits out of a hat,” I muttered. ‘I can’t believe she’s seriously thinking about this.’

“Not that kind of magic. Real magic. Don’t worry, I’ll show you tomorrow, you’ll love it. I promise.” She sounded really excited but I wasn’t sure if she was thinking straight. She did just have a mental breakdown about… three minutes ago.

“Alright.” I let out another deep sigh and moseyed on down to my room. Flopping down onto my bed, I looked to the roof. At least my boner was gone, but now I had a new problem. Twilight wanted me to learn ‘real’ magic. Had she finally lost it? She did realize that I wasn’t a unicorn…

As the thoughts slowly continued to plague my mind, I fell asleep, still thinking about ‘real’ magic…

* * *

I sat with my friend who always went on and on about Criss Angel and how he was some kind of illusionist or magician or… some crap like that. I kept telling him it was probably bullshit and just camera tricks but he insisted on showing me.

We had watched a few other episodes, and I wasn’t sure how he did it, but they were obviously fake. They probably stopped the video feed at parts and then started again after they did the hard part of the stunt.

One episode had him inside a building when it imploded, another had him drive a RC Hummer under a curtain in an empty parking lot and then when the curtain fell the RC had turned into a real Hummer… it was so fake it literally made me want to rip my hair out because my friend was always gawking at the stunts.

“He’s totally real. You can’t fake something like that!” my friend told me and I rolled my eyes.

“Yes you can,” I replied back.

“How?” he asked inquiringly.

“Well… look! He’s faking it on screen right now,” I stated and he just rolled his eyes.

“You’ve been… Mind Freaked!” he said in a sloppy imitation of Criss Angel. I continued to watch his new stunt which was something to do with a nail gun and he was going to catch the nail straight out of the air.

But instead of actually catching it, the nail was going to be shot through a pane of glass first to slow it down. I just rolled my eyes as he readied himself. My friend sat on the edge of his seat, totally thrilled by the act.

The nail gun fired and… the actor started screaming? The nail had slammed into his hand and he was screaming in pain. I snickered briefly but as the actor continued to scream in agony, I laughed harder. My buddy’s mouth was agape as the TV turned to the attention of others, explaining what was happening.

The one director talked about how they weren’t expecting the nail to spew the glass into Criss’s face, making me laugh even harder. “Yeah, we’re gonna shoot a pane of glass and expect it not to spew shards of glass everywhere,” I laughed in a mocking voice.

They started an interview with Criss afterwards and he started changing the story. Now it was that his act wasn’t to catch the nail, but rather that he was trying to explain that he had actually gotten shot by the nail. “Man, that was sooo crazy! Did you see the nail hit his hand, it was totally real!” my friend gasped.

“What? Are you stupid? He was supposed to catch the nail, remember?” I told him and he looked to me as if I was stupid.

“No dude, didn’t you hear him? He was saying that him getting shot by the nail wasn’t an illusion. It was real. You can’t fake that!” he told me and I just sighed. I guess that’s why they were able to do all these episodes and keep going; they were just able to pull wool over people’s eyes very well. ‘I’m gonna catch a nail. Gets shot by a nail gun. Forget me trying to catch the nail. I actually got hit by the nail gun and it wasn’t fake, you’ve been MIND FREAKED!’

* * *

Wednesday, April 10th, 2014…

I awoke to Twilight prodding my side with her forehoof. “What?” I groaned, rolling over.

“Did you forget? Today’s your big day!” she squealed in excitement and I was plagued by the memory that today… was the day that I started magic… ahem, ‘real’ magic.

“I don’t feel like pulling rabbits out of hats today,” I grumbled.

“That’s not the magic we’ll be practicing,” she informed me. I groaned to myself.

“Well, I hate to inform you, but… I don’t like card tricks either,” I stated and I heard her give an irritated huff.

“Real magic, not tricks,” she told me and I rolled over to face her.

Rubbing my forehead attentively, I looked to her. “Feel this,” I ordered her but she was caught off guard by the request. I took her hoof and rubbed it against my forehead. “Feel that?” I asked and she nodded. “I don’t have a horn, hence, no ‘real’ magic,” I told her then rolled over again.

“Ah-ah-ahh, I don’t think so. Now come along, we have a lot to cover today,” she ordered me, grabbing my body in a levitation spell and carrying me away.

I looked to my dog as I floated away. “Lassie, save me!” I teased playfully and my Collie yipped in excitement, thinking it was time to play. As Twilight brought me up the stairs, I grabbed hold of the railing.

I heard her give effortful grunts as she tried to pull me along. Suddenly the wooden railing snapped and I looked at it with a pale expression. ‘That was a nice railing,’ I silently thought.

We exited the home and I looked to Twilight. “Why don’t you teach Spike magic as well?” I asked but her answer seemed a lot easier than I thought.

“He isn’t my student,” she replied as she sat me down in front of a well cooked meal. It was eggs and toast with a margarine dish. There was also some pistachios and sliced oranges along with proper utensils.

“Oh hey! Thanks,” I thanked her before reaching for the fork, but was surprised when she lightly slapped my hand away. “What?!” I asked irritably and she got a teacher look on her face.

“If you’re going to learn about magic, you’ll have to have a need for it. Use a levitation spell to eat your breakfast,” she told me and I raised my eyebrow.

“But the thing is… I don’t ‘Need’ to use magic to eat my breakfast. Watch,” I stated as I went to pick up the fork again but she grabbed hold of it in her magical aura and slapped my hand with it. “EH!” I gasped, pulling my hand back.

“Use levitation to eat.” She spoke in a very teacher-esque voice that was already driving me insane. I finished school so that I’d never have to do it again, now I was stuck learning about levitation.

“How? If you haven’t noticed, I don’t have a horn,” I told her. Just as I said that, Lassie hopped up on the table and began to eat the eggs.

“Hey!” I gasped and went to reach for the eggs but Twilight pulled my hands away.

“Equestria is flowing with magic. Even some earth ponies have learned to use magic,” she informed me and I scoffed.

“Yeah? Name one,” I challenged but her answer was so quick it threw me off balance.

“Pinkie Pie. She has a sense that alerts her to… things,” she replied and I fell onto my back with a groan. “You better hurry, Lassie is almost done with those eggs,” she teased. She was being so playfully cruel that it wasn’t funny.

“Okay, let’s pretend for a second that I might be able to somehow cast magic. How do I do a levitation spell?” I asked.

“It’s simple really. All you need to do is picture that object in your mind and grasp it with your thoughts. Then you should be able to do what you please with it. Levitation is one of the most basic magic spells.” It sounded easier to say than to do, but Lassie was already onto the toast and my stomach was grumbling.

I fidgeted for a second then closed my eyes. ‘Okay think… fork!’ I thought to myself then pictured a fork. The fork was silver and looked just like a plain fork. I tried to think of the fork lifting into the air and glanced a peak at the real life fork, only to be disappointed. The real fork hadn’t even moved a millimeter, and Lassie was slurping up the butter on the saucer.

“It didn’t work,” I stated.

“Try again. Focus, make it move with your mind,” she instructed me.

“Man… this magic shit is tough…” I muttered then crawled onto my belly and gave the fork a cold stare with squinted eyes. “Okay you little fuckin shit…” I clenched my eyes shut and pictured the fork in front of me.

Everything seemed to visualize and I tried to imagine it to be levitating into the air… but I couldn’t. I clenched my eyes harder, trying to make it lift into the air but it still wouldn’t.

“Come on you little fucker…” I hissed.

“Try not to be so angry. Focus… and please don’t swear so much,” Twilight told me. I grunted several times before collapsing my posture with a gasp.

I opened my eyes to see that Lassie had eaten what she wanted, leaving only the orange slices. The fork… still hadn’t moved. “This is hopeless,” I muttered and Twilight sighed.

“You can do anything you can put your mind to. You just need to actually put your mind into doing it,” she informed me.

“I’d like to have some breakfast,” I replied and reached for the oranges but she again lightly slapped my hand away. Putting my mind to it, I reached harder and she was forced to slap me harder to stop my advance.

“Evan, stop it!” she ordered and my stomach growled its reply.

“What he said,” I told her and she groaned while burying her face into her hooves.

“Why can’t you just listen to me? Just once I’d like you to listen and not be immature,” she said with a pout and I rolled my eyes. ‘Yeah, cause this is immature… well, I guess it is a little, but considering she’s trying to teach me to actually lift things with my mind…’ My thoughts trailed off and the tray of food was levitated away.

“I’ll get some more food and we’ll try again,” she said in a very down voice.

“I’m sorry,” I apologized and she looked back to me. “I’m sorry for being a dick. I really am… it’s just weird. Back on my world there was no such thing as magic so I’m kind of sketchy about this,” I told her. Her face brightened into a small smile as she walked away.

My stomach grumbled again and I rolled over and saw Lassie eating some grass. I figured I’d give it a try and maybe tie over my hunger for the moment. I chomped the grass, biting off few long strands… “Ech… this tastes horrible,” I muttered. Lassie’s back arched as she hacked, gagging up some chewed up grass puke. “That’s nasty, dog,” I whispered.

“Man… I feel like… like…” My thoughts searched for someone in my memories who was usually hungry like I was. “I feel like Goku right now. I could just eat a horse… or a pony,” I snickered and Lassie whined out a report.

“It’s a joke. I wouldn’t really eat a pony,” I told her but she whined out a denied yipp, stating that wasn’t what she was asking.

“Hungry? I’m hungry because-” But she cut me off again, yipping something else. “Oh! Goku? He’s this guy from a Japanese show I used to watch when I was younger. He was a human-like alien from another world with superpowers. And he was always hungry, kind of like me,” I replied and she barked out something else.

“Well he just kind of was… always hungry,” I told her but she pawed at me and yipped again. “Oh, his powers? Well he… was super strong and could do Ki attacks. It was super awesome and any kid who watched that TV show has tried to do a Kamehameha at least once. And if they say they haven’t tried, then they’re a liar.” I laughed and Lassie yipped again.

“Well the Kamehameha was this awesome Ki blast and they always dramatized it ‘cause the user would be like ‘KA… MEH…HA… MEH… HAAAA! And then they’d do a super blast wave and every time they used it, it seemed to get more and more dramatic.” I snickered as I remembered the countless times that it just kept getting more and more suspenseful every time it was used in the Dragon Ball Z series.

She barked again but I rolled my eyes. “No, I can’t do it. I’m not from the Dragon Ball TV show,” I replied but again she yipped a reply. “Yeah, Twilight said I could do anything I put my mind to, but I couldn’t even lift a fork. So there’s no way I’m doing some Ki blast,” I stated.

She barked but I shook my head. “I’m not going to try it. I’ll look like an idiot,” I told her but she yapped at me. “Okay fine. Kamehameha,” I said in a very monotonous voice, not bothering to do the actions and still lying on the ground.

Lassie whined and pawed at me continuously. “Fine!” I stood up and did a sloppy motion that didn’t even closely resembled a Kamehameha and muttered out the phrase, “Kamehameha.” But again Lassie saw through my lazy attempt to try and kill the topic.

“I’m not doing it Lassie. It was something from a TV show. It doesn’t work in real life,” I told her but she barked at me, somehow knowing I hadn’t done it properly. “Fine,” I said then stood in a proper posture.

I extended my arms to full length and cupped my hands, left above right. “Ka-meh,” I began, then stepped my right foot back as I swung my arms to my right side. “Ha-meh,” I continued then shot my arms forwards. “HA!” I finished the technique and, like I had predicted, nothing happened.

“See? I told you so,” I stated then laid back down but Lassie wouldn’t let it die. She began pawing at my side, barking all the while in her whiny puppy voice. “I know that in the show they were more dramatic, but I’d look like a dufus doing it like in the movies,” I muttered but still she wouldn’t let me relax.

“FINE! If I try it at least once ‘properly,’ will you leave me alone?” I asked irritably and she nodded. I stood up with a groan just as Pinkie Pie hopped along.

“HIYAH EVAN! Whatcha doin?” she asked in her usual bubbly voice.

“Learning magic,” I stated and she squealed.

“OOOH! Can I watch?” she asked and I groaned. ‘Yeah sure, why not invite the whole town to watch me make an idiot of myself?’ I thought a very snide remark but kept it to myself.

“If you want but it’s not exciting,” I told her then turned to face the outskirts. “Well… here goes nothing,” I muttered and Lassie pawed at me while barking something in dog language. “Yes I know! Serious,” I said in an irritated voice. As if she was actually getting me to try this. It would never work.

I dangled my hands to get ready, stepped my feet into the right position, and then brought my arms forward in a very fluid motion as I straightened my arms to full length. My hands cupped, left over right, as I began the technique… ‘God I feel like such a retard doing this. I can’t believe I used to do this when I was younger,’ I thought to myself, remembering all the times my brother and I would have make believe Dragon Ball Z fights.

My whole body tensed up and I began to shake. “KA-MEH,” I roared, gaining the attention of several ponies nearby. I kept my muscles flexed as I strained, cocking my elbows and swinging my hands to my right side while my right foot stepped back.

“HA-MEH,” I yelled out but now the ponies who had noticed me just rolled their eyes and stopped paying attention. I felt something tingling in my hands but didn’t bother looking; it was probably nothing. A blue light started forming behind my vision and I gulped.

I felt bits of debris tumbling about beneath me while dust was being fumed up around my body. My eyes went wide as I realized something. Something… magical was in the palms of my hands. I felt energy being built up in the palms of my hands. 'OH SHIT! WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO?!' I thought frantically. I didn’t know what else to do so I just shot my hands forwards while stomping my right foot forwards and, like the technique demanded, then yelled, as loud as I could, “HAAAA!”

I felt a burst of something being released from my palms with tremendous force, to which I had never known. My right foot dug into the ground as a furious blue blast wave was emitted from the sphere of energy that lingered on my palms. The blast eradicated the ground beneath it, creating a long crater that was sliced into the earth as the blast wave ripped down my sights.

A massive force of wind gusted fumes of dirt behind me and along my sides as I winced, roaring loudly to try and keep my arms extended.

Finally, after several hundred yards, the beam rose into the air and vanished into a rain of sparkly rainbow dust. Lassie barked in excitement and Pinkie’s jaw dropped, almost like it had unhinged. Both her and I just continued staring in shock of what had just happened.

I stood, in the final pose of the Kamehameha, baffled that I had somehow managed that. “Pinkie?” I asked in a stunned voice, still in the pose.

“Uh-huh?” she asked back, in a dazed voice.

“You just saw that too, right?” I asked.

“Uh-huh,” she replied and my jaw slacked open. I had done it… I had done what every Dragon Ball fan had always wanted to do.

“EVAN!” screamed a voice and I cringed.

“Twilight… did you jus-” But she cut me short.

“WHAT DID YOU JUST DO?!” she screamed, though it sounded as if what I had done was bad.

“Uhm… magic,” I stated plainly but she was still scorned about… whatever it was she was scorned about.

“Do you realize what you just did?” she asked and I nodded.

“Uh… yeah. I just did magic… oh, and I launched a Kamehameha wave which was totally-” But she cut me off once again.

“You… a what? Never mind. EVAN!” she screamed and I flinched, her screaming having hurt my eardrums.

“Ouch! Twilight, not so loud. I'm right here,” I muttered.

“Evan, you have no idea what you just did, do you?” she shouted and I nodded.

“Yeah. I launched a Kamehameha. It was totally awesome. Lassie, props to you for nagging at me to do it,” I said as I knelt down and gave my dog props.

“NO! You didn’t just do that!” she yelled and I nodded.

“Uhh… yeah, I-just-did-that,” I told her scientifically but she wouldn’t have any part of my joking.

“Evan, this is serious!” But again I made a comical joke out of it.

“I know right. I just performed the first ever, real life Kamehameha… ever,” I said in an upbeat tone.

“No! What you’ve done is launched a destructive magical energy blast!” Twilight yelled scornfully and I shrugged.

“So? You wanted me to learn magic. Oh, and I take back everything I said about magic. It’s totally kickass,” I said truthfully, but she was still more pissed off than a shook up hornet’s nest.

“Evan, for once in your life take something seriously!” she screamed and my face went pale. She was pretty mad. “Destructive energy blasts are highly illegal!” she yelled and I gulped. “I can guarantee that Celestia will be here any minute and she’ll be angrier than I am.”

“Oh man… not Lord Death,” I muttered, having only met her on brief encounters and only remembering her as a sort of cloud that just looms over me like some sort of death cloud.

Twilight began to fret. “Oh no… oh this is terrible! What will Celestia say? She’ll probably strip me of my princess title and lock you away in a deep dark dungeon.” Twilight continued to fret while Lassie simply tilted her head in confusion. Within seconds Twilight was rocking in a fetal position. I looked down to my pooch.

“See what you got me into?” I asked and then turned back to Twilight. “I did a magic trick so can I have some food?” I asked immaturely but obviously Twilight was still moody about this. “Oh calm down, Celestia won’t strip you of your princess thing and she won’t lock me away.” I tried to assure her everything would be fine but she was still freaking out.

I just rolled my eyes and looked to Pinkie. “Food?” I asked and the pink mare nodded.

“Oh yeah. I always keep spare food nearby for spare food emergencies,” she stated then dug a small hole in the ground and pulled out a small chest. Opening it, she revealed to me some chunks of sushi with some toast and eggs.

“Excellent. Thanks Pinkie,” I thanked her then thought about how weird it was that she randomly had this food here. I poked it and was amazed to find that it was warm. ‘Man, that’s just creepy.’ I kept my thoughts to myself and started eating while Twilight sat fretting and Lassie danced around with Pinkie, singing a song about the magic of friendship.

Soon enough, a carriage being pulled by royal guard pegasi arrived and Celestia stepped out of her air-carriage-throne. Poking her hoof into the burnt dirt and licking it, she mouthed her tongue around with a suspicious detective look on her face.

“Indeed,” she whispered then walked over to the fretting princess. “What happened?” Celestia asked in her deep, regal voice.

“Princess, I know it was wrong but I-” Twilight began but I cut her short.

“I was all like: KAMEHAMEHA!” I informed her, doing the pose but not actually trying to launch a blast. Celestia raised an eyebrow while Twilight continued to try and apologize.

The guard quickly formulated and I realized that I was without a gun. “Oh for fuck’s sake,” I swore and Celestia motioned for her guards to stand down.

“How long did it take you to master this… Ka-meh-ha-meh-ha?” she asked curiously.

“Depends? How long have I known about it, or how long have I tried to do it?” I asked.

“Both,” Celestia replied and Twilight was lost in confusion.

“Well… I’ve known about the Kamehameha since I was about six, so about… twelve years. But I learned to do it in about three minutes,” I told her but Lassie barked at me. “Right. Lassie kept bugging me to do it and I was like: No. And she kept bugging me so finally I was like: FINE! So I did it,” I told her and Lassie nodded.

“Celestia, please don’t arrest him and put him in a dungeon. He had no idea of Equestria’s laws towards destructive blasts,” Twilight pleaded but Celestia ignored her for the most part.

“You are truly magnificent. Twilight, you have definitely been training him well.” Celestia expressed her feelings then looked to me. “Though what you did was highly illegal, I will let it slide just this once. Just as long as you promise to never do that again,” she told me and the thought brought up memories of the incident with Trixie and Tristan.

“As long as it isn’t absolutely necessary,” I bargained and Celestia chuckled.

“I don’t believe a situation like that would occur in your lifetime,” she told me and I nodded.

“I promise to never do that unless absolutely necessary,” I promised and Celestia nodded then patted Twilight on the head.

“You definitely chose an amazing student Twilight. Don’t ever forget how lucky you are to have him,” she informed the young alicorn and then mounted her throne. With that, she was off.

Twilight stood up into a proper posture and just blinked several times, probably shocked about all that had just happened. “That-” Twilight began and I finished her statement.

“Went better than you thought.” She nodded. I casually shrugged and grabbed a piece of paper and began constructing a note.

Dear Princess Twilight,
Today I learned that perhaps some things aren’t what they seem, or rather, aren’t as ridiculous as they seem and sometimes you just need to give it a try before judging it.

Your Faithful student,
Burdy
P.S. Magic kicks ass!

I handed her the note as I began to walk away. “Huh?” she asked nopony in particular and took a brief look at the note. “Where are you going?” she asked me and I shrugged.

“I’m gonna go get something to eat. Wanna tag along?” I asked before turning and walking with no particular destination in mind. After a brief moment, Twilight raced to my side as we walked towards the great unknown destination together…

Author's Note

Okay, before anyone gets the thought that I'm going to turn Burdy into a super sayian or something, I'm not going down that route. I'm not going to make him a super sayian with godly powers, and what I won't ruin it but later on it'll be explained that what he did wasn't actually a Kamehameha because the properties of what he did and a Kamehameha are different. Just so no-one is like: "GREAT! Now hes going to become a super sayian, I'm out"
Other than that, sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. Editor finished doing his magic to the story (No pun indended... actually it was fully intended)
And gave me the edited version on Wednesday but I was a little less than enthusiastic this week. Something about working 14 hours a day minus lunch break and only having five hours of sleep makes me cranky...
Anyway, I hope you all had a fantastic holiday and I wish you all the best in the new year, cheers eh!

Chapter 17

‘No price too high…’

So I had gapped the fact that I needed money to get food and had to return to the library after searching the entire town for said food when I finally realized that I needed some money. Twilight had offered to pay but I declined and stated that it was my hunger that needed to satisfaction, so it was my money that needed to pay for it.

When I had retrieved my money, Lassie had demanded to come along so, in turn, I needed to wear my trench coat to conceal her. On top of that, since I was wearing my trench coat… well, I figured why not bring Heather along and hid her inside the trench coat as well.

So now I sat with Twilight in some really swanky Italian restaurant called ‘Tony’s Place’, with a Rough Collie and Norinco pump action shotgun hidden in a dark brown trench coat.

Twilight was, obviously, not amused by the fact and constantly questioned my choices. “Bah, what’s the worst that could happen?” I asked and she shot me an annoyed look. “Okay, other than the possibility of getting thrown out?” I asked and she only replied with a facehoof.

“Exactly, my plan is foolproof,” I snickered, twiddling my thumbs while I waited for our food. This place wasn’t as obscenely expensive like Franchini’s, but it was probably way more costly than just cooking it myself.

Soon after, a female waitress arrived and placed out our meal. Twilight had only gotten a light salad while I had gotten some wicked looking lasagna and garlic bread. The aroma from the Italian food drove my stomach to the brink of rage, having been deprived of food for the last few hours minus the tad bit of emergency food that Pinkie some how had.

“Thank you ma’am,” I thanked the waitress who simply left with a nod. I pulled up a chair beside me then set Lassie down on the chair’s cushion. I looked around to make sure nopony was watching me, cut some of my lasagna, and then set it on the cushion with Lassie. “Quiet Lassie, or the warden will know we’re here,” I whispered out my warning and Lassie nodded before making a mess of the lasagna.

Twilight just rolled her eyes. “This will not end well,” Twilight murmured but I shrugged off her words of worry.

“Bah, don’t worry about it. Think about something else,” I laughed carelessly before taking my fork and messing around with my bowl of Italian food.

“Okay, what have you been up to lately?” she asked, striking up a conversation. I looked over to her with raised eyebrows.

“Really?” I asked and she nodded. “Well, depends. I’ve been getting mauled by mystic creatures in this world trying to save a harmless, shy, yellow pegasus. I’ve been getting yelled at by my mentor because she wants me to learn magic and I do-” She quickly cut me off.

“Evan, I got mad because you launched an illegal destructive energy blast,” she scolded me and I shrugged carelessly.

“Yeah, anyway, I’m stuck in a crazy world of talking ponies, never to return home, constantly getting mauled and, when I do, I get some tetanus crap that makes me super…” I trailed off and made sure nopony was eavesdropping on our conversation. “It makes me super horny,” I replied with a deep exhale. “So what’s been new with you?” I asked casually.

“Well, I’ve been at wit’s end trying to control my new faithful student. Trying to keep him out of jail, keep him out of trouble and trying painfully to keep him alive,” she shot back and I simply gave a simple toss of my hands in a show of irritation.

“Well, in that case, I’ve got a mom who cries because she thinks I’m moving out but never asks me if I’m actually moving out,” I countered.

“That’s not why I’m crying! I’m crying because you’re playing with my heart!” she snapped, but not loud enough to draw attention.

“Again, if you just asked me whether or not I’m leaving, you wouldn’t have your feelings hurt,” I told her and she winced before speaking.

“It’s not that! I’m crying bec… because I… I lo-” A sudden scream cut her off.

“GAH! That thing is making a mess!” screamed our waitress who had returned with beverages. I rolled my eyes.

“Okay, I’m not that messy, I only have a bit of sauce on my-” I began but she pointed to the chair beside me and screamed again, but louder this time, so that everypony looked over.

“Not you! THAT!” she screeched and I looked to Lassie, only to realize that she had made several stains in the cushions, smeared the tomato sauce all over the chair and was currently licking the back rest of the beautiful furniture. I let out a nervous laugh as Twilight groaned with a facehoof. I raised my finger and chuckled out a simple suggestion: “Check please…”

* * *

Moments later…

The waitress shook her hoof at me as I rushed out with Lassie in my arms and Twilight following my lead. “Yeah, well… dogs should have equal rights you bastards!” I yelled then snickered as I wiped some sauce off my face.

In all the commotion I had quickly finished my food on the way out, much to the dissatisfaction of Twilight, while at the same time arguing with the waitresses and waiters. Twilight groaned in report. “I can’t believe we just got kicked out of another restaurant. I was really looking forward to that Evan!” she scolded me but I just shrugged.

“It was my money, and besides, all you had was a salad,” I laughed but she shot me an annoyed look.

“That wasn’t what I had meant.” She frowned but I just rolled my eyes. As we started making our way back to town, Twilight gradually simmered down. Sometimes that mare just got mad for the stupidest reasons.

A droplet of rain touched my nose and I looked up. In the short time we had been travelling, the sky had gone from sunny and clear, to dark and luminous. “Aw crap…” I muttered just as Twilight and I made a beeline for the library.

Just as we burst through the door, we spotted Spike and Sweetie Belle watching TV together. “Hey kiddo,” I called out with a deep inhale for air. Spike looked over and waved with Sweetie Belle following suit soon after.

I paced downstairs, hung up my trench coat, and let Lassie mingle. Setting my shotgun aside, I peeked a look at my mirror. Just before I could do some poses, Twilight called my name. I got a devious smile on my face and walked up to the mirror. "I'll call you," I whispered to the mirror and Lassie simply barked out in retort.

I rolled my eyes and paced back up the stairs. Twilight was waiting with Applejack at the door. “Sorry tah ask, but Mac is busy an ah promised tah put in some fence posts fer Rarity today. Was wondering if maybe yah could help me out?” AJ asked and I nodded.

Wearing only a white V-neck, work boots, and cargo pants, I followed her out into the pouring rain and to the farm where she had a wagon with stacked fence posts. I pulled on the collar of my shirt and felt the damp warmth of my sticky, wet shirt. “Great… rain,” I muttered and AJ snickered before shaking like a dog.

“Well yah can thank Rainbow Dash fer the generous weather. She is the Ponyville weather pony after all,” she laughed and I rolled my eyes. “Ah’ll pull while you push and we should be able tah get the wagon tah Rarity’s in no time,” AJ ordered.

I pulled off my shirt and placed it on the wagon. Rain now coursed down my bare chest, soaking my already drenched pants even further. Now even my boxers were wet. ‘Why did I agree to this?’ I thought silently.

My boot treads stomped into the mucky earth as I began to push the wagon along, with Applejack in the towing position. The wagon was heavy, I would admit that, and I wondered just how much of the weight AJ was pulling.

As we continued on, the weather got worse and worse. Lightning flashed with the crackle of thunder echoing shortly after. The storm was very close, but AJ seemed determined to get this job done. Well at least the rain wasn't ice cold.

“Why doesn’t Rarity do it?” I yelled over the clashing sound of thunder.

“Because she doesn’t do the dirty jobs,” AJ laughed.

“Why not use her magic?” I yelled back to her, over the sound of the pouring rain. The rain was so heavy that almost nothing else could be heard.

“Because she’s… she’s in a bit of a situation today. Ah’ll leave it at that,” AJ replied. If the situation was bad it would make sense that Sweetie Belle was over at Twilight’s. “Oh, hey, this is the fun part! Hop on!” AJ called and I did as she instructed. Little to my knowledge, we had just hit a steep slope, and as I let go and hopped onto the wagon, we started to careen down to Ponyville.

AJ let out a cheer of excitement as I gulped. The wagon shook a little as it sped down the incline. “This… this thing doesn’t have brakes, does it?” I asked as it felt like the ass end of the wagon was about to kick out.

“It’s the best part. Don’t worry, ah’ve done this lots before,” AJ replied and steered the wagon using the tongue hitch. As we neared Ponyville, the wagon wheels hit slick pavement, and showed no signs of stopping.
“Uh-oh… uhm… maybe yah’d like tah slow us down?” AJ asked and I gulped. ‘Eeyup… definitely no brakes.’

“Ah thought yah done this before?!” I gasped and she nodded.

“Ah have… ah just didn’t know the roads were this slick,” AJ replied in a somewhat nervous voice and I groaned. The wagon was still travelling fast, but not at incredible speeds. I slowly edged myself to the rear, with my knees on the back edge of the wagon.

“AJ! YOU’RE GONNA OWE ME ONE AFTER THIS!” I yelled then gripped the back of the wagon tight and let my lower half fall off the wagon. As soon as my feet hit the ground I lost my footing and began skidding about.

With a grunt, I stiffened my upper half and swung my legs around in front of me then began to grind my heels against the road. The pavement quickly started wearing down my boot tread as I stiffened my legs, applying makeshift brakes for the wagon.

I spotted the Carousel Boutique approaching fairly quickly. I stiffened my body further and began to pull back on the wagon with my hands. I felt the wagon start to jog as Applejack turned the front wheel to the right in a sharp turn. The ass end started bouncing and hopping as it finally skidded to a stop in front of Rarity’s shop.

With the ground no longer fighting against me, I ended up collapsing with a gasp. “Uhm… sorry ‘bout that. Won’t happen again,” AJ laughed nervously. I just groaned in report and rolled over face first into the wet pavement road. Rain drizzled onto my bare back and it felt kind of nice to be lying like this.

I tilted my head and looked over as AJ knocked on the front door of the boutique. Rarity answered with haste and it seemed like she was in some sort of bad mood; not angry, just a little fidgety. Her legs were constantly moving about and she had a strange look on her face, almost like she thought there was somepony after her.

She and AJ both nodded and, with that, the door closed and my boss returned to the wagon. “Alright, let’s get tah work,” she announced and I sighed while standing up. 'No rest for the wicked I suppose, I thought silently to myself.

Post after post, we unloaded the fencing which, by Rarity’s standards, was pretty basic. Though I handled most of the work, AJ did throw in her fair share. ‘Hands really do come in handy,’ I kept my thoughts to myself.

As the storm continued, the lightning and thunder became more severe. There was almost no delay between flash and crackle of lightning. “We’ll have tah hurry, storm’s gettin worse,” AJ informed me and I snickered.

“Oh really? I didn’t know that,” I laughed sarcastically as I turned to show her my bare, soaking wet chest and drenched pants. She rolled her eyes and gave a short, quiet laugh with a shake of her head.

* * *

Inside the boutique, third person…

Rarity whined to herself. Her estrus cycle had really snuck up on her, and with terrible timing no less. Not only was she supposed to watch her younger sibling, but also was planning to put in her new fence today.

“How am I… supposed to work… with these urges… this is THE-WORST-POSSIBLE-THING-EVER!” she cried to herself before flopping down on her panic couch. Her aroma of estrus filled the air throughout the entire boutique, requiring her to close shop for the day in order to maintain her self-image. She would never allow ponies to believe her to be... loose.

She continued to whine and cry to herself until finally giving into her urges. Moseying up the stairs, she felt her loins quiver and threaten to force her legs to give out on her right then and there. “Just a little further darling,” she assured herself.

She entered her private room and locked the door behind herself. “Nopony will find out. Just this once.” She calmed herself enough to utilize a levitation spell and pulled out the fake horse shaft that used to reside in her washroom until her last incident.

As she drew the stiff rubber cock closer to herself, her legs finally gave out from the debilitating urges that plagued her mind. Lying on the ground but still able to use her magic, she levitated the toy down to her face.

Ever so slowly, the tip neared her mouth and she extended her slick tongue. She danced circles around the flared tip, lubricating the surface before slowly delving the toy into her mouth. She danced circles around the cock's length while it resided inside her mouth, the shaft itself becoming slicker by the second.

Her lower lips quivered in demand for attention. The white mare slowly removed the toy from her mouth, a string of saliva connecting her lower lip with the tip of the cock.

Using her magic, she slowly trailed the tip down her neck, past her chest and slowly down her belly. As the toy cock neared its prize, her back naturally arched in anticipation.

Her legs shook and stiffened, nearly bucking, as the toy brushed past her slippery wet cunt. The tip slowly approached her entrance but instead of thrusting herself, she began teasing.

Rarity bit her lower lip as she brushed the tip up and down her crevice, driving her building lust to the breaking point. “Oooh Rarity… you naughty filly,” she whispered to herself.

Her legs twitched and wiggled together as she drove herself to the brink. With a cry of pleasure, she ever so slowly started sliding the phallus into her snatch. Her slick wet lips spread apart to accommodate the size of the cock as it started filling her.

She drove the rubber penis in, inch after inch, and quickly reached her orgasm. With a moan of pleasure, her legs stiffened while her entire hip region clenched. A spurt of liquid seeped from her stuffed snatch, creating a small puddle on the ground.

With a deep exhale, she slid the cock out from her cunt, but her inner walls still clenched in desire to milk the fake cock. A masculine voice sounded from outside in a rhythm tune that aroused Rarity’s curiosity of whom it belonged to. It sounded like nopony she had ever heard before

“I ho, I ho, I’m off to Mexico.” There was a short laugh that followed but, with the storm so fierce, only the lyrics reached the beautiful white mare’s ears. She peeked out the window and spotted Twilight’s love interest. He wasn't speaking in his regular tone, but rather a mocking voice.

The big man hulked around the wooden posts as if they were mere feathers. His muscles tense and water dripping down his frame, Rarity gulped to herself. “Rarity! How dare you think of him that way!” she scolded herself before returning her gaze to the man.

She slouched her body to the side and let out a sigh as she imagined him entering her room, just as he was now. He’d grip her body with his drenched masculine hands, water dripping from his impeccable body, and then thrust himself into her. Rarity’s body quivered from the thought as her lower region urged for the need of sex.

“I suppose no harm… no foul,” she whispered innocently. Peering out the window and watching the man, her rump rose slightly, revealing her dripping wet hole to any who might enter the room, but that wasn’t an issue since she had locked the door.

A sudden lustful urge crossed her mind. ‘I could always go down there and just subdue him… perhaps he would enjoy it,’ she thought, her magic moving with a mind of its own and unlocking the door so that she could leave.

She gripped her thoughts and slapped herself across the jaw. “Rarity! You know Twilight loves him. The mere thought that you would think of doing such a thing is shameful!” she scolded herself but the phallus that thrusted itself inside of her didn’t help the urges that ravaged her body.

She hopped up to her hindlegs and placed her front hooves against each side of the window frame and she continued to pleasure herself. Juices splashing on the floor beneath her, and her undeniable scent filling the room as she moaned in the ecstasy of sex. Rarity quivered from the thought of the big man rutting her, holding her tight as he drove himself into her.

He paced around outside, singing a tune that mocked the original. Ever so slowly, Rarity lost herself in thought, imagining that the fake cock inside of her belonged to the man. “Oooh… oh yes… rut me you beast.” Her whines filled the room but, with nopony to hear, the conversation stayed with her, and her alone.

Her head dropped down as she looked to the floor, the cock still hammering her wet cooch. More and more, her moaning quickened as she started to build up for a second cumming.

Just as she neared her climax, the unlocked door swung open. Both she and the figure gasped in embarrassment. “GAH!” they both screamed and Rarity swung around, tossing the slimy wet cock in a random direction.

Unfortunately, with no sense of aim, the sticky cock slapped Burdy in the face. A smear of Rarity’s juices slimed his face. “Ugh!” he groaned as he wiped off his face in utter disgust.

“Don’t you knock?!” Rarity gasped but Evan was too busy trying to wipe the juices from his face. Realizing that she was in a very awkward predicament, she quickly went about to try and cover herself up. “It’s not what you think,” she announced and Evan simply nodded.

“Probably not, so we’ll leave it at: this never happened,” he stated and Rarity wiped her brow with a ‘phew’. Rarity looked up to the man only to notice his eyes searching her body, observing every curve.

Rarity made quick work to conceal her most private areas, most notably her wet hole and hard nipples. “Are you…” Rarity trailed off and Evan gulped with a shocked gasp.

“GAH! Sorry, I… uhh… lost myself in thought… I’ll uhm… just go,” he quickly stated and made for the door. With her climax still edging at her, Rarity’s urges quickly got the better of her.

Her magic immediately enticed the door and slammed it shut, locking it and keeping it closed. Evan turned his head with a raised eyebrow. “Come over here and rut me you wild animal.” Rarity tried her hoof at seducing the otherwise dense man.

“Uhm… well I… that is to say…” He trailed off but her magic gripped him by his belt buckle, pulling him over while at the same time undoing his belt. “Well… I-I-I shouldn’t. AH... I-I-I mean… I really-” Rarity cut him off as she pulled his head towards hers and locked lips with him.

He gave a muffled report but before he could back away she drove her tongue into his mouth. He tried to gulp but couldn’t as her tongue snuck deep into his throat. His body slowly unhinged and his tenseness faded away.

Her forelegs tangled around his back and held him close, her magic sliding off his pants and undergarments. His rod already rock hard, her magic aura began to play with it, slowly stroking up and down.

The big man managed a muffled groan before Rarity pulled both their bodies onto the bed. She needed this, badly. She apologized mentally to Twilight, knowing that she had a burning desire to love and cherish the man. However, she assured herself, that if Twilight was in her situation, she’d do the same thing.

Her forelegs traced up and down his back as they lined themselves up, still kissing each other furiously. Burdy pulled away from the lustful kiss and began to slick his tongue down her neck, forcing Rarity to arch her back in passion as she moaned out her tunes of love.

His hips slowly rocked forwards, sliding his cock into her depths and nearly instantly lubricating his cock with her slimy pussy juices. Rarity moaned loudly before burring her face into the big man's shoulder, then began to lick the length of his neck as he did to the opposite side of her.

“Oh yes darling! Drive me! Rut me like a filthy whore!” she squealed but the man stopped and placed a kiss on her cheek.

“I could never consider you a whore, ever,” he told her and a tear trickled down her cheek. Even during intercourse he was such a gentlecolt. Her lips quickly returned to his and their tongues dangled around each other.

His hips rocked back, sliding his cock out of her depth entirely. Very slowly, he thrust himself back inside of her, nearly filling her and forcing a moan of pleasure from deep within her throat. Every time he pulled out of her, she had an insatiable urge to be filled again. It was as if she was not complete without him inside of her.

He wasn’t the biggest she had ever had, but he was the most sincere and filled her with a feeling of love that nopony had ever done before. “Love me, love me like you would one of your own kind,” she whispered to him and he gulped.

“I’ve never… uhm… well, not until now,” he stammered feverishly.

‘He’s a… a virgin?!’ Rarity gasped with the sudden realization. “Darling, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to… for-” She was cut off as he placed his lips upon her. Rather than sneak his tongue inside her mouth, he held a very gentle and loving kiss.

Breaking from the kiss, he began to rock his hips against hers. His cock slid in and out of her with a timed pace that she quickly matched. Rocking into his hips, and sliding back in unison motion with him, the sensation of intercourse nearly doubled.

She held her hooves around his back until the pleasure started to become too much to bear. Her body fell back and she moaned loudly as he continued to thrust into her. She lost her rhythm and just laid there as he pounded her. Her moans grew louder and louder as the building pressure inside her continued to grow to a limit she had never reached before.

“Sweet Celestia… I’m… I’m cumming!” Rarity squeaked. Evan leaned against her and Rarity nestled her face into his neck and screamed loudly as she reached her climax. She began to kiss his neck feverishly as she endured the thrilling orgasm, her juices seeping out of her stuffed love hole.

As she reached a near peak in her orgasm, Evan grunted as his body stiffened. A warmth started to fill her and her eyes went wide as she glided across a new plateau of pleasure…

* * *

The door opened and a gasp filled the air, but it didn’t come from Rarity. Rarity fell from the window and scream. “GAH, Applejack!” she squeaked, bursting out from her fantasy world.

“Ah didn’t mean tah…” the southern pony began, but trailed off as her right eyebrow rose with a hint of suspicion. “What were yah doin at the window?” she asked and Rarity gulped.

“Nothing! Nothing, darling just… getting a breath of fresh air,” she lied with a sloppy smile and opened the window wide, forgetting about the terrifying storm outside. Gusts of rain and wind blew in her face, causing her to immediately slam the window shut.

Burdy heard the window slam and looked up, then just shrugged and figured it to be nothing. He grabbed another post and went back to work as the two mares upstairs continued their conversation.

“Rarity…” AJ said in a rather calm voice as she looked out the window to the dense brute who was doing most of the work she agreed to do. “Yah know how Twilight feels about him,” she told Rarity in a very stern voice and Rarity gulped with a feverish laugh.

“I know darling, it’s just… these urges are-” But the southern mare quickly cut her off.

“Ah know what it’s like tah be in heat, an’ ah know things can get… out of hoof sometimes. But fer Celestia’s sake Rarity, don’t let yer urges get the better of yah! Especially when our friend’s feelings are on the line,” Applejack told her close friend, who sighed in reply.

“I’m sorry,” Rarity apologized sincerely. “I just figured if I kept it to myself and didn’t get carried away… well, no harm no foul right?” she asked and the farmer took a deep breath through her nostrils and then nodded.

“Fine! no harm no foul. Just make sure yah don’t bring him into it, for Twilight’s sake,” she stated and Rarity nodded in complete acceptance. With that settled, the farmer left and proceeded outside where Burdy had almost completed the task.

* * *

Evan’s perspective…

So the storm was getting to a near terrifying point. Lightning was striking dangerously close to the town, making me wonder if I should still be working outside. Applejack trotted out and right over to me.

“Yah should probably leave,” she told me in a very blunt voice.

“Say what?! No way! You got me out here to help you with this job and you’re not gonna get me to leave and let you do the rest,” I told her.

She looked down to the ground and thought to herself. “Well, yah see… it’s not that... well yah see... the uhm…” She looked around, obviously looking for a truthful excuse.

“Sorry AJ, but you’re the Element of Honesty, so I know if you’re trying to make up truthful excuses,” I said with a calm tone, and then continued to heave around the supposedly heavy fence posts. I suppose if I was the size of a pony it would be more difficult, but this is where I am truly proud to have used the last few months to do nothing but pump iron.

“Well… Evan, ah promised not tah tell, so ah won’t. But ah will say this, go home right now an speak with Twilight about-” She was cut off by a sudden siren and a fire engine carriage that blew past us. Water was splashed from a rather large puddle and an enormous wave of water hosed the both of us. I clenched my eyes shut until the water had all settled again. 'Jackasses...' I thought to myself.

We watched the carriage zoom off into the distance and as we followed its path with our sight, we saw an ominous glowing light in the dark horizon. “What in tarnation?!” Applejack gasped and zoomed after the carriage.

I looked to the wagon stacked with posts, then to Applejack who had a lead on me now, then finally to the ominous glow in the distance. “Sorry Rarity, but I’ll finish this work later,” I muttered an apology to the mare, even though she probably couldn’t hear me.

Ponies were fast, and I had trouble even keeping pace with the distance between us and she easily outclassed me in speed. Ponies had four legs, and that’s my excuse. As we got closer to the farm, the orange ominous glow grew brighter, and my stomach started to twist. This wasn’t good, I just had this terrible feeling.

I arrived two or three minutes after AJ, and spotted her nearby with Dash, Derpy, and a few others. Firefighters blocked off the area and were blasting water cannons at the barn, which was engulfed in flame.

“LET ME THROUGH!” AJ screamed but a firefighter stallion held her back with several others behind him. Mac ushered his sister away who burst into tears just as a scream came from the barn. Rain still gushed down from the clouds above as lightning struck nearby, adding a freaky atmosphere to the situation.

“The hell’s going on?!” I yelled but AJ couldn’t speak, she was shredded in an emotional wreck. I looked to Dash who only gulped with a shiver. I pointed to the firefighter who had held my boss back. “You!” I yelled and he looked over to me, “The fuck is going on?!” I roared.

“There’s a filly stuck inside but the barn fire is nearing the flash point,” he responded and I gave him a confused look.

“The fuck does that mean? Never mind, go in there and save her!” I yelled but he shook his head.

“We can’t, it’s too dangerous. We’ll have to try and calm the fire down before we try anything,” he responded and I moved forwards.

“You’re telling me there’s a fucking pony in there and you’re not going to try and save her?!” I roared but he and two others held me in line.

“Sir, if the flash point hits, everything will spontaneously combust, it’s too dangerous,” he informed me in a stern voice. He stood on his hindlegs, gripping me with his front hooves while standing nearly eye to eye with me.

Everything seemed to slow down as I looked back to the Apple family. Dash, Fluttershy, and Mac tried to calm down the emotionally wrecked Applejack. The elderly Apple family granny stood nearby, also shedding tears, and that’s when it truly clicked. I knew exactly who the filly was.

My face twisted into an angered fury as I turned my attention back to the firefighter who was holding me in my place. An animalistic snarl escaped my mouth as my lips curled like an agitated wolf. I wasn’t necessarily angry at the firefighter, but he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. With a bout of anger I slammed an incredibly painful punch into his exposed gut, making him gasp and double over.

As he slouched, I brought my right arm up high and drove a nasty elbow into the back of his head, instantly knocking him unconscious and slumping him to the ground. The firefighter to the left tried to make a move but I reversed the momentum of my right arm and slammed a wicked haymaker across his head, shattering his helmet to pieces and sending him tumbling across the ground.

The third firefighter, to my right, darted for me but I swung my arm and backhanded him, clotheslining him and sending him crashing into the ground, his back slamming with a painful sounding THUMP!

I heard someone scream my name but I paid no attention. What I was about to do was stupid... insane... and probably borderline suicide. If I didn’t do it, Applebloom would perish, that much I knew.

Firefighters nearby spotted me rushing by and tried yelling at me to stop, but in my rage and anger, I couldn’t hear them. It seemed more like a dream now: things moving slowly and ponies screaming without words, it just seemed cliché.

I burst through the front doors and time returned to normal as a gust of flame blasted at me. I crossed my arms over my face to protect my eyes and felt a shiver travel down my back as I gulped. 'This is madness!' I thought briefly to myself.

Running foolishly into the building, I screamed out for Applebloom, but got no reply. Burning ashes touched my bare chest and burnt my arm hair. I coughed as smoke entered my lungs.

“Next time… I make the plan first,” I coughed and started pacing aimlessly into the barn, calling for Applebloom. I heard another scream that sounded as if it came from upstairs.

I raced over to the first set of ladders and grabbed the wooden rungs, but the wood had already begun to burn. I screamed in pain, pulling my hands back, but another scream from the young filly buried me deeper into my angered fury.

Without any thought of self-preservation, I grabbed the rungs and trekked upwards. I could feel my skin and flesh getting burned away and, as I reached the top of the ladder, one of the rungs I stepped on snapped.

I nearly lost my place and fell, but luckily my left hand held on. My body swung to the side and my bare back got fried against a burning post. I roared in pain and quickly swung back around then pulled myself up onto the haymow.

Bales which I had personally stacked myself, burned into nothing but ash. As I made for where I thought I had heard the screams come from, a roof beam snapped and came crashing down on top of me before I could even blink.

My screams of agony were drowned out by the crackling of flames and gusts of fire. The six by six beam was heavy and scalding hot. It threatened to crush me and probably would’ve if not for my muscular from. My body squirmed and withered in absolute pain as the beam not only pinned me, but started burning my fleshy skin.

The burning beam torched into my bare chest, debilitating me and rendering me helpless for the moment. A voice echoed in my head, the one who belonged to a dear childhood friend of mine. “You can do it… you can do anything you put your mind to,” Derreck told me.

A ghostly image of him formed above me and he knelt down. His body mass was even larger than mine, yet he still managed to find clothes to fit him. A nasty scar started at the top right of his forehead and traveled directly down his face, just barely missing his eye and erasing the eyebrow hair where it passed. It continued down his right cheek, passed his jaw, disappeared for a few inches, and then started again at his neck and traveled on a bit of an angle, ending at his collar bone.

A second scar was on a diagonal across his entire face. Starting at the top left of his forehead; it travelled diagonally downwards, passed over his eyebrow but not his eye, left its deep jagged mark across his nose, then started again on his right cheek. It crossed paths with his other facial scar, traveled down around his neck, and finally ended on the back of his right shoulder plate. Another scar was present on the right side of his top lip and dug in his skin a little.

The scars gave him a terrifying look that, added with his stony cold eyes, sent shivers into even my spine. “Do it for her. If not, then she dies,” he said, reaching down and gripping the log with both hands. I reached with my right and placed my hand over his but our hands fused together… well, sort of, he was a ghostly figure and probably some sort of hallucination due to smoke inhalation.

With a pained grunt we threw the massive beam aside, and it smashed through the feeble wall and to the ground below. He reached down with his burnt right hand and grabbed my burned hand.

Together, we stood my body up and stabilized my posture. “Now save her before it’s too late,” he told me before vanishing into the flames.

“Applebloom!” I yelled and I heard whimpering nearby. I scurried over to see the young filly shaking underneath a collapsed set of wooden beams. They had just started catching fire so, at the moment, she was relatively unharmed.

With a roar of agonizing pain, I grabbed the burning beams and tossed them aside. Applebloom cried as she leapt onto my burnt chest, holding me closely and I returning the tight embrace, holding her tight to make sure I didn’t lose her.

I turned back to leave the way I came but beams started falling from the roof, and the roof itself started collapsing. I heard screaming from outside as the barn started to heat up to an unbearable temperature. ‘This must be the flash point that one guy was talking about…’ I trailed off my thoughts as things started to burst into a frenzy of engulfed flame.

I gulped, turned and began running for the nearby wall. I felt the burning heat scorching my already torched back and howled in agony as I shifted my running stance. I turned my left shoulder towards the wall so that Applebloom would be sheltered from the collision.
I felt the impact but clenched my eyes shut from the excruciating pain that now riddled my body as I fell to the ground. I made sure to twist so that I’d hit the ground and Applebloom would be cushioned by my body.

My back hit something really hard, not as hard as stone, but harder than what the ground felt like. I heard a smashing sound and the ground beneath me cratered a bit. I tilted my foggy vision to see that I had landed on the hood of a fire engine carriage, one of the new motorized types.

I flofped my head back just as an explosion of flame erupted from the building, followed by screams from the crowd not too far away. “WE GOT INJURED!” screamed a firefighter nearby. Others rushed over and I felt Applebloom’s tears sting my burnt chest.

“Applebloom…” I whispered groggily and she looked up to me with frightened eyes. “You’ll be okay,” I assured her and flopped my head back with a pained and rather crude laugh. AJ rushed over and gasped with a sob as she plucked her younger sister off my chest, holding her tight.

The pain of reality now struck me as my fury wore off and I felt the full pain of my rescue mission. I winced and groaned as tears trailed past my eyes; this hurt really bad. Dash was the first to rush to my side, followed by Derpy who fell to her knees in tears. Technically Applejack was the first to arrive but I didn’t blame her for not gasping over my state, her sister had nearly died just moments ago and family always takes priority.

I looked to Dash with a pained expression. “I think… I need… to go… to the hospital…” I whispered exhaustedly then flunked my head back in pain.

* * *

Wednesday, April 29th, 2014…

So I had been in the hospital… for quite a while now. I guess it had only been two weeks, but wrapped up in a bunch of medical gauze didn’t make time go any faster. I had asked for a medical potion but they stated that, when I had fallen, I had busted a rib in my lower back and that the burns were so severe that I might not heal properly if administered a healing potion. They said that if I waited until I started healing naturally they might be able to help. Of course that was supposed to be anywhere from one and a half to two months from now.

The left side of my face had been burnt a little so now it was covered in bandages and I was blinded on that side due to the gauze wrap. My body served no better and my entire torso was wrapped up. Luckily for me, my pants had saved my legs from severe burns and the pants themselves were being cleaned by Rarity, who also volunteered to fix my boots.

However, even with the obvious pros of living through it, there was the shittier part of things. Twilight was, obviously, extremely static about the whole ordeal, having only heard about it once I had returned to the hospital. She had probably stayed with me the most out of anyone, only leaving to tend to the library when absolutely necessary.

I did kind of like Twilight's company though. Regardless if it was mostly about the brash idiocy of my actions, she did praise me once or twice for saving the young filly's life. That and it was nice having her around, even if she insisted on holding my hand half the time.

Applejack believed herself to be in some sort of eternal debt with me and was always coming by once a day to ask if I needed anything. I tried telling her again and again that it was nothing but she never listened.

I had only seen Derpy once and even then I didn’t get to talk to her, she just rushed out in tears. The others, minus Twilight, came around every so often to offer me company. Redheart stated that if my constant injuries continued, she’d have to reserve a room just for me, seeing as how they have to constantly ready a properly sized bed for my larger-than-pony body mass.

Other than that, things were alright, all aspects considered. I looked to my watch that rested on the night stand table, only to see that it was rather early in the day, 10:28am to be exact. My cold silver Christian cross lay flat on my gauze covered chest and I managed a smile.

I looked up to the ceiling and smiled, knowing that ‘He’ himself was probably watching over me. “I know I don’t talk to you much, but thank you. Thank you so much.” I sent the Lord my thanks as a tear dribbled down my face.

My hospital door opened and Nurse Redheart entered. “Time to change your bandages,” she informed me and I nodded as I staggered my way out of bed. My busted rib didn’t make things very easy and the lingering pain of the burns was still there.

She, among all the doctors and nurses in the hospital, was about the only one I trusted to care for me right now. I know that doctors were supposed to be professionals and take their jobs seriously, but I just had this suspicion that with how I was, that one grey doctor would probably take advantage of my situation and stick me with a needle or something.

We slowly undid my bandages, all of them. I was supposed to be bare and I was, due to the hospital gown not fitting me. At first it was weird, having a nurse tend to me while I was pretty much naked, but eventually I got used to it. I would wear boxers but the top waist lining irritated some of my burns both on my back and stomach.

At my request, Redheart usually stood on her hindlegs so that her head wasn’t so close to my private areas which were exposed. As we removed my gauze, I looked to all the burns which were deep and dark red. It looked horrifying, like something from a horror movie which seemed all too real.

My mind shivered at the thought of my body being permanently scarred. In the end I always came back to the thoughts: it was for Applebloom, and that always made it worth it. Redheart soon finished with my bandages and looked up to my eyes. "Now be good and I'll find you a juice box," she told me with a wink. I smiled lightly, she always had a way of treating me like some little kid. She walked out but didn't leave long before returning. It was in fact, so brief that I hadn't even managed to get back into bed.

“You have a visitor,” she informed me and I looked back to see Derpy standing in the doorway. I smiled and nodded as Redheart left Derpy and I alone.

Derpy stepped towards me but stopped a few feet away. “What’s cracking Derpy?” I asked enthusiastically.

“I… I just wanted to say I’m sorry and… and… and goodbye before I leave.” She had to suck back a deep breath before finishing the last part. She sounded depressed and nearly tear stricken.

“WHAT?! Go where?” I gasped as she turned to leave but I managed to grab her before she could do so. “Gah!” I gasped as I felt some of my wounds split open underneath my bandages. “Derpy, hold on! Please tell me what’s wrong,” I pleaded desperately, not wanting to lose such a close friend.

“I almost killed you.” She burst into tears and fell to her knees. I was lost. ‘How did she almost kill me?’ I wondered to myself.

“What? No you didn’t,” I laughed and she nodded.

“Of course I did. Rainbow Dash had me help her with the rainstorm because she was behind schedule and wanted some extra time afterwards to practice her new moves but… but…” She trailed off in sorrowful tears.

I painfully knelt down beside her and nodded. “Go on Derpy, it’s okay,” I gently ushered her to continue.

“I kind of… well… it got out of hoof really quickly and I accidentally struck the barn with a bolt of lightning..." she trailed off and gulped down a deep swallow. This was obviously hard for her but I rested a hand on her shoulder, assuring her that I was there for her. "And then it caught on fire and… well… I couldn’t stop it… I’M SO SORRY I ALMOST KILLED YOU!” Derpy screamed in tearful sobs but I shook my head and gently took her into a loving hug.

“Derpy," I whispered, tears now ready to ravage my eyes. "Never ever think that you almost killed me. What happened with you was an accident and accidents happen, no matter how severe. And what happened with me was my own choice, nopony else’s. Hell, that’s why I decked those firefighters.” I ended with a snicker from the last comment then hugged her a little tighter. “I will always love you Derpy, no matter what,” I told her and she whimpered into my shoulder. Tears trickled down my eyes, but I’d never let anypony but her know I was crying.

Shw wiggled a bit, hugging me slightly harder, and I returning the gesture. Her beautiful mane course down passed my shoulders as she shuddered in my arms, sobbing from the emotions that were now out.

“Promise?” she asked through a sob and I nodded.

“Tail Twist Swear,” I replied with a smile as tears ran down my face. She squeezed me tight, really tight, and I gasped in pain. “Der… erpy…” I wheezed painfully as she unintentionally put me through agonizing pain.

She quickly released me with a shocked look on her face. “Sorry… I guess I shoulda told you… my ribs are a bit busted, so it hurts to hug that tight,” I informed her then returned to a gentler hug.

I felt her sniffle and snort from time to time as she held me while I held her back. Even Twilight wasn’t this emotional, but I’m glad we cleared this up. “Thank you Evan… thank you for forgiving me,” Derpy whispered and I nodded.

“It’s what friends are for,” I whispered back, but now tears poured down my face against my will with no signs of stopping. After several moments we broke from the hug and stood up. “Are you crying?” she asked and I nodded.

“Yeah… just don’t tell anypony. It’ll be our little secret.” She nodded while I wiped the tears from my face. Moving over to my bed, I gently flopped down before reaching over to the nightstand.

“Wanna play a game or something? It gets boring in here,” I asked the ditzy mare who nodded. “Okay, just give me a second while I do something important,” I told her then retrieved a pencil and paper. Rather than make a pun, I made sure to keep things proper, since this was another serious letter to my teacher.

Dear Princess Sparkle,
It may not have been all at once, but I recently learned that friendship is a truly priceless thing. No matter the cost, always help your friends who are in desperate need. If ever in doubt, reconcile with a friend, perhaps it isn’t as bad as you may think, and above all else, love and cherish those you hold dear.

Your faithful student,
Burdy

Author's Note

Okay, now that's depressing... or heart wrenching, however you wanna put it. Oh and a funny little tid-bit of information about me for you guys, I know a lot of you critisize Burdy for being this dense, but take my word for it, I'm that dense. My brothe slaps me upside the head every time we leave some place where I've stricken a nice calm (To my knowledge) conversation with a cashier and he says "She wanted your dick and you were like: durr!". Anyway, I just kind of hit mid-life crisis really, really, really early. I kinda wanna buy a Harley Davidson (Not like a: I want it because I wanna be a cool kid, but because I want to have a V-twin engine motorcycle to cruise around when I feel like it.)
Anyway, as always, I hope you all are doing well out there and if any of you want to ask me about my personal life, feel free to give me a shout. Okay well, best of wishes to yah all!

Chapter 18

I call her Belladonna...

Thursday, April 30th, 2014…

My head throbbed as I burst through the doorway. Everything was red and would give a beating vibration whenever my head thumped. As I cleared through the doorway, my chest was hit by something painful, very painful.

I flew back through the doorway from whence I came. I tried to breath but could barely manage. My lungs seemed to be perforated by something. Blood spurted from my chest where a massive cavity had been created.

A figure paced up towards me with a pump action shotgun in hand. Presuming simply by the fact that the figure had a set of human breasts and stood in a bipedal stance, ‘She’ leveled the shotgun to my chest and squeezed the trigger. I felt my heart stop along with my lungs.

My world went black very briefly, and I could’ve sworn that I was dead. I mean, I just got shot in the heart by a shotgun at nearly point blank range. Very quickly my senses returned and I felt a strange feeling inside my chest.

My heart felt like it was reconstructing itself alongside my lungs. Unfortunately I still couldn’t breathe properly, but I managed to snarl. The figure stepped back with a gasp, already sliding shotgun shells into the otherwise empty shotgun.

I growled viciously as my chest sealed up, completely restored. I charged forwards and pummeled her body through the doorway and over the stairway railing on the other side. Our bodies plummeted to the ground several stories below before slamming into a trash dumpster.

Several glass bottles shattered and I cursed whomever hadn’t recycled. Shards of shattered liquor bottles seared into my side. The woman twirled out of the dumpster in an acrobatic way, landing on her feet and readying the shotgun.

I jumped out of the trash dumpster in a less fancy way but, as soon as I landed, she blasted me with a wad of buckshot that slammed into my chest and rammed me back inside the dumpster.

I heard the rack of the shotgun’s slide as she neared, along with the empty plastic shell clacking and bouncing across the ground. Just as she neared the bin, the shotgun barrel leaned into the dumpster and I clenched my right fist. I felt something slicing through the flesh between my knuckles, causing me to grunt in pain.

I roared in agony as my skin sliced open and three bony blades lanced out, gleaming with a bloody shine, gleaming in the moonlight. I shot my left hand forwards and grappled the shotgun barrel, slicing my hand blades towards the woman.

Just as I started swinging my claws, the shotgun went off. The blast of gunpowder burned my left eye while I felt the pellets of buckshot tear away my face…

* * *

I screamed in an uproar, bursting straight up with a gasp, right hand clenched. Redheart screamed in fear, holding her clipboard tight to her chest as my left hand gripped her by her collarbone, right hand ready to drive her face in.

It was a dream… just a dream. I gasped in shock, immediately releasing my grasp on her and settling back into bed. “I’m… I’m so sorry,” I apologized in my most sincere voice, petrified that I had almost laid a pounding to my nurse while in deep sleep.

My heart still pounded in my chest, thumping loudly from the occurrence of my dream. “I… I heard you grunting in your sleep. I thought perhaps you were having a bad dream and that… that maybe you’d like to be woken up,” she whispered in a still frightened voice.

I gently grasped her left hoof then placed it to my beating chest. “I’m really sorry… I am. See?” I asked, hoping for her to understand that my heart was pounding because I had almost drilled her.

She gasped then quickly undid my bandages. “What did you do?” she gasped and I was at a loss. Didn’t she know? I almost clocked her one.

“I’m… my heart is thumping because I almost hammered your head in with my fist,” I stated but she finally unwrapped my chest bandages and we both gasped in unison. My chest was… healed up? My chest hair was missing but my skin was…

I ran my fingers down my smooth skin. “That’s impossible,” we both stammered as she joined in on touching my chest, her soft hoof running a trail down bare flesh. This was… unexplainable. My skin felt baby soft.

“Did you take any healing potions from the medical cabinets?” she asked in a stern voice and I shook my head. “Don’t lie to me. There’s no way you could have healed up those kinds of wounds that quickly,” she inquired, but I still shook my head.

I quickly remembered my dream and immediately felt the tops of my hands, feeling for any bone claws that might now reside inside my hands, but was relieved to find none. That shortened the list significantly, but still left the question open. “I… I don’t know what’s going on,” I stammered but she quickly went about to shooing me out of bed and undoing my arm bandages.

I then realized that I had morning wood, which didn’t help the situation. I tried to conceal myself with the undersized hospital gown. Redheart undid my bandages and we were again shocked by similar results. My arm hair was missing but, again, my skin was restored to a baby like smoothness.

“This is insanity. This has to be some sort of dream,” she whispered and I nodded in acceptance. She moved to my front side and started to try and pull away my bandages but I stepped back.

“Hey!” I gasped, feeling a little exposed due to my lack of proper clothing.

“What?!” she shot back, irritated by my sudden movement.

“I’m indecent,” I replied but she rolled her eyes.

“Deal with it. This is more serious than your personal comfort. Now lie down so I can examine your other wounds, if they even exist anymore,” she stated before trying to force me onto the bed. I reluctantly obliged and lay flat on my back while she undid my bandages. With how I was lying, my boner sprang free from its loose domain and pointed straight into the air for all to see.

I covered my face in embarrassment. This was absolutely humiliating. She continued to unwrap my bandages. Every bandage that was taken off revealed fresh skin. She shot a rather inquiring glare at me.

“Don’t lie. How did you get the healing potions?” she asked but I just shrugged innocently; as I was.

“I didn’t take any healing potions, I swear,” I pleaded, telling her the truth. Truthfully, I had no clue as to how this happened. She continued her glare at me but my hands reached to her shoulders and I brought her closer so that I was glaring back at her.

“I swear I did not take a healing potion,” I told her in the most serious voice that I could muster. However, fate would have it that my voice mixed with an Arnold voice, and it didn’t sound all that serious but rather more comical.

She leaned back but, before she could speak, another voice entered the room. “Redheart, he may be under your exclusive care but, for the love of Celestia, keep it on the professional level,” spoke an irritated voice.

We both looked over to see a grey furred doctor, the one whose arm I broke when he tried to stick me with a needle. “This is professional,” I replied but he simply rolled his eyes.

“Not in our profession. If you two really can’t keep it in your pants, then lock the door,” he snarked and I raised an eyebrow. ‘Keep it in my…’ I quickly puzzled together what he had meant and covered my exposed erection from view.

He went to leave and Redheart muttered something to herself before chasing after the doctor. “Doctor, it’s not what you think!” she yelled, and I rolled my eyes. Great, now the doc probably thought I had a thing with Redheart.

I quickly came to my senses and realized that, if I didn’t have any injuries, I could logistically put on some underwear without any pain. I grabbed my boxer briefs from the table in which my property lay.

All I had was a pair of boxers, my Christian cross, and my watch. Rarity had taken my damaged clothes to be repaired while Twilight had retrieved my shotgun, so I was left defenseless for the time being. I slipped on my boxers and cross then smirked. "Well at least I'm not fried anymore," I muttered with a brush of my shoulder.

I sat down by the window and slid open the curtains. It was sunrise and the morning was kind of beautiful. Sliding open the window, I was greeted with a gust of warm air that brushed against my fresh skin. It felt wonderful, never before had I been so relieved to feel fresh air against my bare skin.. I pulled up my watch to see that it was nearly seven o’clock.

A butterfly moseyed on through the window and I turned my head to the door, only to see it closed. With a smile, I returned my gaze to the beautiful pink butterfly then extended my right index finger for it to land on. A gentle smile crossed my face as I watched it flutter around my finger, almost ready to land.

I waited several minutes until, finally, the natural beauty perched on my finger and stood stationary as such. I sat and watched for what seemed like hours, just looking at the tiny thing as it sat lingering on my finger, basking in the morning sun.

A voice from behind me took me by surprise. “Nature really is lovely when you wait for it, isn’t it?” asked a very gentle voice. I gasped and flicked my wrist, prompting the butterfly to take off.

I turned to see Fluttershy watching me with a gentle and loving smile. “I… THE THING!... I was…” I pointed out the window with my index finger. “I was… uhh… pointing at a dog and telling it to shut up and…” I pointed to my right index finger with my left. “And the uhm… the thing, the uhh… the butterfly raced onto my finger before I could shoo it away!” I lied, trying to preserve my manliness.

She looked down to the ground with a depressed face as she trailed one of her front hooves around in circles. “Oh…” she whispered in a sad voice. “I’m sorry, I just thought that… never mind,” she murmured. I bit the lower right side of my lip.

“I’m not a very good liar, am I?” I asked with a chuckle and she looked up with a curious face. “I just…” I trailed off, thinking of an explanation that wouldn’t seem too absurd for me.

Leaning my head back and to the left, I let out a sigh as I rubbed my closed eyes with my left hand. “Nature is just…” I trailed off again and bit my lip, not wanting to say it. “Beautiful,” I whispered.

I heard Fluttershy give a content sigh but I just groaned. “Don’t tell anypony I said that,” I muttered, with embarrassment in my tone. Fluttershy laid down by my side, almost like a faithful dog. Her hair flowed about freely and beautifully, her silky mane touching my soft skin and sending sensations up my leg.

I rested my left hand on her head and gave it a loving rub. She sighed to herself as we watched the sun rise together, though I have no idea why she was here.

“So Fluttershy... what brings you about?” I asked curiously. There was a long pause before I got my reply, but it didn’t matter to me if she replied or not.

“I was just wondering how Lassie and you were getting along,” she replied and I nodded, continuing to rub her soft, silky mane.

“We get along like the best of friends,” I stated and she nodded. Without actually looking, I noticed a third presence in the room. My body instinctively sniffed the air and somehow I noticed a lingering aroma of… apple.

“AJ?” I asked and a shocked gasp entered the room.

“How… how’d yah know it was me?” she asked in her typical southern accent.

“I…” I trailed off in thought. “I smelt you,” I said in a rather confused voice, not sure exactly how I had noticed her fragrance.

“Is... is that supposed tah... tah mean somethin’?” she asked seriously, perhaps presuming it to be an insult, but I shook my head.

“I have no idea. I just… somehow smelt apple and… it smells pretty good,” I informed her, taking another sniff of the wonderful smell of fresh apple. It was like there was a fresh plate of sliced apples.

“Ah need tah… tah thank yah fer… fer savin’ muh little sis,” Applejack began to thank me but I brushed it away.

“Applejack, you’ve thanked me over three dozen times, probably four dozen. I get it and, believe me, I don’t mind,” I told her casually.

“No, it ain’t that easy." She paused for several seconds before speaking again. "Fluttershy, can ah have a moment with Evan alone?” she asked and Fluttershy stood up.

“Oh, okay. Whatever you want.” Fluttershy nodded and sheepishly fluttered away, leaving into the hallway and closing the door behind her. Applejack approached me from the right side and stood in front of me, tears already flowing from her eyes.

“Ah… ah lost muh… muh parents a long time ago an… an’ ah promised ah would never, ever, EVER! Let anything bad happen tah muh little sis.” Applejack stifled her sobs and swallowed deep.

I nodded with a slight smile. “And you’ve done a damn good job of it. Applebloom is growing up to be a fine young filly,” I assured her but she shook her head and brushed away the tears from her face.

“But… but the other day… ah thought… ah thought that was it. She was trapped in there an’ there was nothin’ ah could do but…” she trailed off and hiccupped back a sob. A lone tear trickled down my face. God, if she kept this up then I'd be in tears too. “Yah just… yah just ran in there like Supermare, not carin’ fer yer own life an’ saved muh lil’ sis.” She couldn’t hold back her tears anymore and began to weep uncontrollably. I suppressed the tears I had then just rolled my eyes with a shrug.

“Bah, it was nothing… maybe a little dangerous, but I digress. It’s what friends are for right?” I asked in a seemingly care free voice but she shook her head.

“That ain’t the point! Ah promised tah protect her but ah didn’t! Ah couldn’t! YOU DID! Yah put everything on the line an’ just… yah just did it without needin’ bein' asked… yah just ran in there like a big brother would… like ah shoulda… it shoulda been me runnin’ in there, not you!” She was weeping heavily now but I simply stood up and ripped open my hospital gown, revealing my fresh skin.

She looked to me and her eyes went wide. I spoke first. “No… it was me for a reason. I don’t know why or how, but it had to be me and it was,” I stated. She gasped and as her eyes went even wider.

“How did… ah don’t understand. Yah... yah was burnt yesterday,” she stated the obvious to which I rolled my eyes with a smirk.

“I don’t know what happened or why, but like I said; it was me for a reason, and I’d do it again in a heartbeat without a second thought,” I told her seriously. There was a long pause in which we just stood there, looking at each other. Her gaze was one of disbelief, but mine was a little more casual. “Now...” I trailed off with a sigh as I flopped back down into my seat. “If you wouldn’t mind,” I offered her to move to one side. “You’re blocking my view,” I laughed jokingly. She turned, only to see the sunrise before turning back to me, still with teary eyes.

“Ah will never be able tah thank yah enough,” she whispered and I let a smile cross my face.

“Tell yah what,” I began with a grunted chuckle as I rearranged myself in my chair. “You bring me in some outside food and we’ll call it even. The food here sucks,” I said in a serious tone. Funny, now I sounded like Dash. AJ was lost, obviously due to how easily I’d call it even.

“But… but-” she stuttered.

“AH!” I interrupted her. “I wouldn’t usually ask for anything, but since you’ve made it out like this: bring me food and we’re even.” I laughed to myself quietly and under my breath, still trying to keep things a little bit serious.

“Really?” she gasped, almost like it was a big deal. I just casually tossed my hands as I rose them into the air with a shrug.

“I like your family...” I trailed off and thought back to my old life. “It uh… it reminds me of the family I used to work for… kind of. They weren't ponies,” I said with a smile. “I’d do anything for you guys, and don’t forget that,” I told her as a tear trickled down my cheek. Remembering my old life always brought up painful memories. Not that the memories were bad, but the fact that I’d never see any of them again… it was kind of heart crushing.

She stepped forwards as if to give me a hug but I whined jokingly. “AWW… I just sat down!” I laughed with a smile then extended my hand. She took my hand with her hoof and gave it a good and strong shake.

She gave one final nod before leaving. Fluttershy, however, had probably left because she never re-entered the room. I sat alone until it was 8:38am and, at that point, Derpy hovered in with a small rectangular box in her hooves.

“Yo Derpy, sup?” I asked with humor in my voice. She displayed the box for me to see, but it was just a faded brown box. “What’s up?” I asked and she pulled over a table and chair before setting down the box and revealing the contents.

“Do you wanna play a game with me?” she asked and I raised both my eyebrows.

“You play chess?” I asked, surprised by the fact that the otherwise dopey mare would ask to play a game of such strategy. I figured her to be more of a checkers player.

“Of course! It’s kind of fun, but not many ponies will play with me,” she informed me and I just leaned my head into my left hand, elbow resting on the armrest of the chair. I let my weight rest against my arm as I pondered the thought. I was alright at chess. I didn’t want to wipe her off the board, yet, at the same time, I didn’t want to just let her win effortlessly; that would take the fun out of it.

“Okay,” I agreed and she quickly set out the game. She was playing as the white pieces and I was the opposing black. I was curious, however, as the chess pieces were almost identical to the ones from my home world except one major difference.

The king of the white pieces was Celestia, while my king was… another alicorn of whom I wasn’t familiar. “What’s up with this guy?” I asked, presenting my king piece in wandering thought.

“That’s Nightmare Moon. She’s really bad,” Derpy informed me and I raised an eyebrow.

“Well that seems a little one sided. The white pieces are the good guys while the black pieces are the bad guys.” I was going to add a bit about racism but I figured, in Equestria, they wouldn’t know what that was… well, maybe they would. “So, you want me to be the bad guys?” I asked with a hearty laugh and she gasped.

“Oh! Did you want to be the good guys? Icanchangeitifyouwant!” she sputtered out quickly, hastily shifting the game board around and scattering all the pieces about. I laughed with a sigh and helped her reset the pieces, with the black still on my side.

“It’s okay Derpy, I was just messing with you,” I chuckled then took a long look at my king piece. The craftsmanship was top notch, but they made Celestia look so happy and nice, and they made this ‘Nightmare Moon’ look so evil.

She had a medieval like helmet that concealed most of her mane. She did look kind of cute… ‘WHAT DID I JUST THINK? Did I just call her cute?’ I thought, quickly realizing that I was now considering random ponies whom I had never met before, cute. This world was really starting to get to me.

I set my piece down and we began the game. To my utter surprise, Derpy was not just good at playing, she was an absolute champ. In only a handful of moves, she had nearly wiped out all of my good pieces. Both bishops, a rook, and my queen were now absent from my roster. On top of that, I only had three pawns left. Yet, despite this, I had only taken out one of her rooks and two of her pawns.

‘Oh my God… she’s kicking my ass,’ I thought with a small smile. I went to move my only remaining rook then looked to her face as she watched in anticipation. I took my hand away and moved it to another of my pawns, but she watched my every move with her watchful, crisscrossed eyes.

I let out a chuckle as I smiled brightly. “What’s so funny?” she asked curiously as she looked to my face and I just shrugged with a hearty smile.

“You are.” I smirked and she pointed to herself innocently as if she was trying to defend herself from a guilty accusation. “Yes, you. I can’t do one thing without you watching me like a hawk,” I laughed then quickly snuck a move with one of my pawns but she, without looking, moved her queen across the board and took out the pawn I had just moved.

“Check!” she squealed in delight and I groaned. I looked to every avenue as how I could get my king out of the situation he… well, seeing as how it was Nightmare Moon, I guess I was trying to get my king out of the situation that ‘she’ was in.

I let out a sigh. “Huh… checkmate,” I muttered, but Derpy shook her head.

“No it’s not. You could do this,” she offered, moving my rook sideways and taking out her own queen for me.

“Ugh!… why would you show me what to do?” I gasped, shocked that she’d make such a move.

“Well… honest sportsmareship I guess,” she stated and I shrugged. She made a move with one of her knights but I moved my rook and took it out, putting her into a check.

“Drat… checkmate,” she whispered to herself but I shook my head. I quickly moved one of her bishops in front of my rook’s path. “Why would you…” she trailed off with a smile as I returned the gesture.

“Sportsmareship,” I chuckled then moved my rook and overtook her bishop. For the next several moves we ended up making the other’s move and finally she used her last remaining pawn to take my last remaining knight, yet I took my king and overtook her last pawn, leaving only our kings.

“Huh…” Derpy trailed off and observed the chessboard very closely. “So what now?” she asked, but I merely shrugged.

“Guess it’s a draw,” I muttered as I stood up and stretched. “Well Derpy, I dunno about you, but I’m feeling like gettin’ outta here before they stick me,” I told her but she was lost in confusion with what I had truly meant. “Stick me with a needle,” I enlightened her before making for the door.

As I left into the hallway, I spotted Redheart making her way towards my room and ducked back inside. I knew it was highly likely she’d keep me here a few more days to examine me or something before actually releasing me.

“Derpy,” I whispered, looking to my companion. “Distract Redheart so I can make my escape.” She nodded and quickly made her way into the hallway.

“Nurse! Nurse I don’t feel so good,” Derpy groaned, holding her stomach as she hovered towards Redheart. I peeked out the doorway to see Derpy faking a bad stomach ache as she lay on the ground, grasping her stomach area with her front hooves, withering in fake pain.

I snuck out into the hallway and around the corner, then down the stairway and to ground level. Doctors made their routes to their patients but, to me, they were like patrolling guards.

I leaned my back up against the corner of a wall and peeked around. Three doctors conversed around one of those water dispensing thingies, the ones with the little paper cone cups.

I turned away and grunted to myself. There was no way I’d make it past them like this. My peripheral vision caught a glance of something of virtuous importance. I looked to my left with a hum of curiosity as I rubbed my chin in thought.

* * *

Third person…

The trio of doctors in the hallway conversed with one another, each holding a cone cup of water. “Yeah, so he was burnt to a crisp in some fire out on the Apple farm, really brutal apparently,” the first doctor said to the others.

“I heard that he knocked out three firefighters and his punch actually shattered one of their helmets,” said another. As they continued conversing, a cardboard box snuck behind them in the hallway, creeping about unnoticed.

“Yeah, so he got here burned up real bad but apparently he would only let Redheart care for him.” The first began talking again, still none of them noticing the cardboard box creeping past in plain view.

“Well, don’t you know, those two have a thing for each other,” the third informed the other two who were instantly curious to his explanation, ears perking in attention to his story. “For Celestia’s sake, haven’t you heard?” he asked the other two but they shook their heads.

He groaned and just shook his head in pity for the two. “Redheart gets off on stallions who are hurt bad and in her care,” he joked, but in a serious tone. The big man inside the box gasped silently to himself as he stopped with a shocked: Huh?! He quickly turned his attention to the story.

“Well jeez, I thought you two would’ve heard by now. Just this morning one of the doctors, the one who had his arm broken by Twilight’s faithful student, walked in on Redheart just as she was mounting him. She was totally going to ride him cowpony style!” he gossiped but Burdy just gasped in shock.

“That’s not true!” Burdy grumbled, forgetting that he was supposed to be sneaking. A comical alert bloop echoed as the three doctors gasped.

“HUH? What was that?!” the first doctor asked aloud.

“Who’s there?” the second joined in as the trio turned towards the direction of the cardboard box.

“What’s going on?” the third chimed in as they started to search for their eavesdropper. They searched for several moments before all letting out sighs.

“It must’ve just been my imagination,” muttered the first as they quickly returned to their previous conversation about the false story of Redheart and Burdy’s affair.

Burdy blew an exhale through his nose then raised the cardboard box slightly off the ground and snuck off towards the exit.

* * *

Evan’s perspective…

Just as I made it into the lobby, I discarded the cardboard box for the time being. Weird, it looked and felt just like the one I had used to hide from Tristan. I quickly thought of making my escape, but a mare’s voice quickly killed my good mood.

“Excuse me! Mr. Burdick, over here!” she called out and my head drooped before I put on a forced smile, then paced over to the front desk. “Redheart didn’t say she was letting you out and… if records are correct, you should be in here for another few months,” she stated, but I shook my head and revealed my bare chest from underneath my hospital gown.

She gasped and looked back to her reports. “It says that you had severe third degree burns and that medical lotion could not be applied for the time being until it started healing!” she exclaimed but I shrugged.

“That nurse that cared for me: Redheart, has the best damn care techniques, par none.” And I quickly thought back to the gossiping doctors. “And those techniques aren’t sexual, regardless of what anypony around here says. She’s the best damn nurse I’ve ever been cared by and, as the humble student of ‘Princess’ Twilight Sparkle, I will personally vouch for her any day of the week,” I told her sternly as I leaned up against the wall.

“Oh my!” the check-in mare gasped and I nodded.

“Oh yeah. Right now she’s tending to a mare with a severe stomach cramp that could be fatal,” I over-exaggerated the situation by a mile but, again, the check-in mare gasped. “So she’s a little busy to write my medical papers, but she said I was free to go,” I lied and the check-in mare nodded then wrote it through.

I was about to start boasting about Redheart again when I saw her personally escorting Derpy towards the lobby. Redheart didn't look happy. My eyes went wide as I looked to the check-in mare. “I gotta run, toodles!” I stammered out my goodbye in a jiffy then dashed out of the hospital doors and down the streets in my bare feet.

After getting far enough away from the hospital, I waited for my grey pegasus friend. Derpy arrived shortly after with a snicker. “I burped,” she giggled and I laughed.

“Guess she didn’t take it so seriously after, huh?” I asked and she closed her eyes then shook her head with a bright smile.

“Nope, then she realized that you had left and she was really angry.” Well… that was one more reason for me to try vigorously to never have to go back to the hospital with serious injuries.

We laughed about our adventure for the duration of our journey back into town until finally arriving at the library. “Well, I gotta fly. Let’s hang out again soon!” Derpy said with excitement and I nodded.

“Totally,” I replied with a smile then turned around and gave the Tail Twist Swear. We parted ways, each with our own smiles from the morning adventure. I entered the library without knocking and caught Twilight by surprise.

“Ev… EVAN!” Twilight gasped then rushed over to me. “What are you…” she trailed off, obviously spotting my exposed skin which was healed up. “How?” she asked in utter shock, not sure how to take this.

“Yeah, I don’t know either,” I told her and she lept on me, and like Applejack had done after the barn fire, nearly broke my ribs in an incredibly tight hug. “Jeez… I think Derpy’s the only one who hasn’t tried to put me back in the hospital,” I gasped for air as she constricted me even tighter, like a python or something.

“Evan, I was so worried that I was going to lose you. I just didn’t know what to think,” Twilight wept but I grunted for air.

“Twilight… release me,” I wheezed and she quickly let go of my body. “Jeez… Have you been… lifting weights?” I gasped for air as I managed my question, but she just shook her head with a sheepish blush.

I let out a deep exhale as we embraced each other into a less detrimental hug, but then I got a tad bit curious. “Where’s Spike?” I asked, but Twilight simply shrugged while still cuddling into the embrace.

“He left earlier with Sweetie Belle,” Twilight informed me. I nodded before breaking from the embrace.

“Well… I’m feeling a bit sluggish,” I muttered before making my way for the downstairs basement.

“Wait Evan!” Twilight called out and, without actually tilting my head, I looked up to the ceiling with a sigh.

“Yes?” I asked, not really irritated but slightly annoyed because I knew that tone. She was going to want me to do something ridiculous.

“Do you… want to maybe… read together?” she offered and I turned back to see a book in her hooves. The story’s title read ‘Mackenzie Bolack’ and the front picture was a mare with some sort of hoof-bow-gun-thingy. It looked kinda like what that cat morph bandit had used while trying to rob Flim and Flam.

“I know you don’t like sappy stories, but Mackenzie might be a little more your style. She’s a little violent but she’s had a rough past and-“ I cut her off.

“Does she fight a war everlasting against the mobsters and corrupt police forces?” I asked and she was at a loss for words.

“I didn’t know you were familiar with the series,” she stated her thoughts and I gave a so-so shrug.

“Kind of. Back on my world there was a series just like that. It was called ‘Mack Bolan, The Executioner’ and he was, without a doubt, probably my favourite fictional story book character par none! He was strong, tactically intelligent, he knew his guns and, best of all, he named his primary firearms. BT, or as he called it ‘Big Thunder’. It was his .44 Automag and man was it nuts. He was always shooting up the bad guys. He also had a Beretta Brigadier that he called ‘Belle’ and it was…” I trailed off, realizing that she would have close to no idea what I was talking about.

“You’ll really read it with me?” she asked excitedly and I nodded.

“Just one thing,” I told her then rushed downstairs and searched for some decent clothes. I quickly found my refurbished clothes. discarded the medical gown and slipped on my cargo pants, a fresh white V-neck t-shirt, and my M81 camouflage jacket. I rushed back upstairs just as Twilight was setting up two chairs with her magic but no sooner had she done so that there was a knock at the door.

I tossed my arms in aggravation as I quickly went to answer it. Never once since I had arrived in this world was I so stoked to read a book. I swung open the front door to see Rarity dressed with some sort of bonnet and a basket dangling in her magical aura.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Is Twilight home darling?” she asked in her usual voice. Twilight immediately came to my side and Rarity smiled. “Darling, is Spike home? I need some help digging up gemstones for a new dress I’m designing,” Rarity asked, but Twilight shook her head.

“Nope, sorry Rarity. He left earlier today with your younger sister,” Twilight replied.

Rarity swung her hoof to one side. “Drat, whatever shall I do?” she cried in a despaired voice, almost like a cliché damsel in distress as she swung her hoof to her head and let out a faint gasp. Twilight and I just watched her act before she looked to us in slight distress. “No, seriously! What am I going to do?” she asked in a serious tone but we just shrugged before I thought up a possible solution.

“Just use your feminine charm on somepony,” I offered, but she simply began to flail in despair again.

“Oh it’s just awful. Everypony is busy today and I must have my dress done by tonight.” Then she looked to me with sparkling eyes. “Darling, would you be a sweetheart and help me?” she asked in a fluffy voice as she brought her hooves close together and fluttered her eyes at me.

“Well…” I sighed looking to Twilight. I had really, really... REALLY, wanted to start reading that book but Rarity was probably in a bad spot. “Alright.” I let out a deep exhale while Rarity squealed. Turning to Twilight, I gave a smile with an inhale and just shrugged.

“Keep that story handy. I’ll read it with you as soon as I get back,” I promised her. Twilight held the story to her chest with a sigh, her eyes sparkling as we left. I felt the same as she did; I wanted to read that damn book.

As Rarity and I left, she levitated a shovel over to me. I stopped as I realized something; I didn’t have a gun. I rushed over to my truck and made for my SVT-40 then I realized something else. Rarity didn’t do the heavy work, so having a large rifle would be cumbersome.

There were only two reasonable options, maybe three. Either I take Heather, my Norinco 870 clone or… my heart fluttered a little. It had been a long… very long time since I had taken... ‘her’ out.

Truly, she was probably only but a mere two pounds lighter then Heather but would be easier to carry around with the custom leg holster. I went to the passenger side door of my truck and Rarity gave a huff. “What are you doing? We’re wasting daylight!” She tried to hurry me along in haste, but I’d have none of it.

‘Why would you want a caliber of that size? It’s just absurd.’ A distant memory played through my mind as I leaned the passenger seat forwards and grabbed the leg holster meant specifically for Belladonna.

‘You name your guns? God, and I thought I was weird,’ laughed a voice from yet the same memory. I strapped the holster to my leg. It was a twin strap, one higher than the other and both having a buckle rather than looping leather like classic holster straps.

The holster didn’t feature anything really fancy, and Belladonna’s barrel was usually sticking out of the bottom by about two and a half inches. The handle would rest and keep the pistol supported while the rest simply fit with an uncanny snugness. For safety, or whatever it was designed for, it had a safety strap latch that looped over the massive handle grip.

‘I have something you might like but, uhh… it’s a bit finicky.’ The memory conversation continued. I opened up the opaque black container in the backseat of my truck and took a deep breath of air as my heartbeat pace quickened.

Without getting too carried away, I quickly stuffed Belladonna into her custom holster and latched her in. I pocketed several loaded magazines, some with original ammunition from my home world, and other magazines loaded with custom Flim and Flam ammunition.

All of the shell casings were golden brass in colour, with a heavy 300 grain jacketed hollow point bullet fitted onto the shell. I gave a nod to Rarity who simply tilted her head as I slammed the passenger door to Cadence.

“Just for safe measures. Trust me, you never know when trouble is about,” I informed her before she tossed a shovel into my hand and led me out into the countryside. As we walked the boring walk, my mind slipped into my memory.

* * *

A long time ago, Earth…

My buddy and I snickered together as we discussed various firearms. Eventually he brought up the topic of my Restricted license which was supposed to arrive soon.

“So what’s the first handgun you’re gonna get?” he asked and I replied as if I had practiced the line hundreds of times. His left eyebrow raised high. “Why would you want a caliber of that size, isn’t it a bit absurd?” he asked and I merely shrugged.

“Go big or go home I suppose,” I laughed back and he simply shook his head.

“Those things are novelty items,” he told me but I simply scoffed.

“I’ll probably call her Belladonna,” I informed him and he just chuckled as he stood up to leave.

“You name your guns? God, and I thought I was weird.”

Months later…

I sat on my front house porch as an import SUV arrived onto my front lawn. The house itself was hidden deep in the forest from prying eyes. My friend stepped out and I stood up. He said he had something for me and that it was a surprise so I had been waiting anxiously all day for him to arrive.

Leaving his SUV running, he walked over with a black opaque case in hand. I went over to meet him and he spoke before I could. “I have something you might like but, uhh… it’s a bit finicky.” He opened the case and my eyes went wide.

“I can’t take this. I don’t have my handgun license yet!” I gasped but he shrugged.

“Well, I bought this brand new but I couldn’t even get it to fire one round. They won’t give me my money back either and the gunsmith says it’s really busted. Thought maybe… because you have a way with guns… that you could fix it and keep it. No one has to know and if the cops ask me, I’ll say it blew up in my hands so I tossed it in the scrap pile,” he laughed and my heart started to thump as I grazed my hands across it for the first time.

As my hands touched the cold frame, it seemed to gleam brightly, and I swore I could’ve seen an inscription written into the slide. As I looked closer, the inscription disappeared. “We’ll figure something out…” I trailed off as I touched the gun.

* * *

Present time…

I snapped out of my memory and decided it was time to seal the gap. “Rarity, hold on. I need to do something,” I told the mare who stopped and looked to me in irritation to what I could be so important that I'd need to waste time doing it.

I walked several yards away and set a stone on a larger rock. The stone was of fair size, about four inches in diameter. I walked back about twenty yards then turned to Rarity. “Get behind me and cover your ears,” I told her before unlatching the strap on my holster.

I carefully unveiled my massive handcannon and brought it up to chest level, barrel facing the sky on a diagonal slant. I brought my left hand across, gripped the top of the handgun’s massive receiver block and racked back the hulking slide.

I kept the receiver locked back as I watched the firing pin block latch the shell casing into place. Releasing my grip on the receiver, the slide slammed shut with a CHING. My heart began to race as I extended my right arm to full extension, then brought my left hand to the grip in a Weaver stance. My legs spread wide as I readied myself for the first shot in a long time with this beast. Time seemed to slow as I was sucked back into yet another memory.

* * *

Long ago, Earth…

I had finally gotten it… Ahem, I had gotten ‘IT’… No, not it, her. I had gotten ‘HER’ to work. I had no idea what was wrong, but I had played with her for a few days. The hammer worked, the slide worked, hell, the whole gun worked, so I just figured maybe it was nothing and that I had gotten a $2000 gun for $500. “SCORE!” I yipped and walked out to the back of my property.

Sure, shooting a handgun while not on a range was illegal, but by my count, just having the thing was already illegal, so to hell with it. I had done a bit of research and apparently these things were unreliable, cumbersome, overpowered, over weighted, pieces of steel shit. Well, I was about to find out.

I slammed the magazine into the handgun then rammed back the receiver with force, allowing it to slam shut. One thing was for sure, the slide sure was stiff. I readied myself for the recoil which I was sure would be tremendous.

Legs spread at shoulder width apart, and both hands grasping the large hand grip, I licked my lips. Sucking my tongue back inside my mouth, I slipped my right index finger into the trigger guard, then squeezed back.

A horrifying echo roared out into the otherwise peaceful afternoon air. A circular ring of muzzle flash erupted in front of my handgun that could even be seen in broad daylight. The muzzle spat out a thundering 300 grain bullet that slammed into a tree trunk and burst a massive cavity out the backside, splintering shards of wood about.

The recoil jolted the handgun in my hands, thrusting my sights off target and lifting the muzzle three, or maybe three and a half inches, higher. I blinked in utter disbelief. ‘Was that it? Was that the so called: uncontrollable recoil?’ I wondered. Literally every single review I had read stated that the gun had a tremendous recoil that was absurd and uncontrollable.

I blinked and fired again… then again… and again, and again until the handgun’s slide locked back, signaling that it was empty. I just stood in shocked disbelief. That was in no way uncontrollable, not by a mile. I would admit it had more oomph than a 9mm but… in all seriousness, it just felt like a supercharged .357 magnum.

I was seriously disappointed. All those stories about the absolute insane recoil of these cannons and I here I was figuring that I’d have to work strenuously to build a relationship with the gun in order to use it right and… in the end it wasn’t all that difficult to use.

“Dammit… well at least she’s mine,” I muttered, then checked to make sure she was actually empty before turning to head home.

* * *

Present time…

I lined up my shot and the chrome barrel seemed to gleam. Along the left side of the barrel, the custom cursive gold inscription read ‘Belladonna’ while the right side of the barrel had the words reading ‘And thy lord shall set thee free’. The grips had been customized into pearl grips, each with a black Christian cross set in the middle of the grip. The sights were a luminescent white which, at the moment, didn’t offer any sort of advanced sight acquisition like it would during the night.

I squeezed the trigger and the triangular muzzle thundered out a single well placed shot. Without ear protection, the handcannon’s report was enormous. The gun jerked as a circular flash was emitted into the air directly in front of my gun.

The hulking bullet flew down range with impeccable accuracy and the stone was decimated into pieces. I brought the triangular smoking muzzle down to my side and ejected the magazine then removed the bullet from the chamber. I thumbed the slide release before slipping the spare bullet back into the magazine then placing the magazine back into the gun, I nodded to Rarity. “Just making sure she still works,” I told her with a nod before holstering the pistol.

“Darling, may I ask a favour?” she pleaded and I nodded. “Never do that again. It was much too loud,” she stated and I snickered. Probably one of the most notable drawbacks of this gun: the noise.

We continued out into a field and her horn lit up, magic spurting out from the tip. “Over there darling,” she pointed to a spot on the ground and I placed the tip of the shovel blade to the ground, then began digging. Not even a minute into digging I drove the shovel into what looked like already processed gems.

“Woah!” I gasped, seeing as how the gemstones were pre-processed yet only a foot under the surface. Rarity handed me the basket and I started shoveling the gems into it with my bare hands.

“Are all the gems in Equestria like this?” I asked, wondering if perhaps we just stumbled across a lucky batch.

“Oh heavens no. Some are rubies, others are sapphire-“ I quickly cut her off and grabbed a random gem.

“No, I mean. Are they all fine, or do you have to process them?” I asked and she looked to me.

“Process?” she asked in a wondering tone.

“You know, process? Like, refining them?” I asked and she shook her head. “You don’t have to pressure treat them or anything, just wash them off?” I asked and she nodded.

“Well of course dear, that’s how all gems in Equestria are,” she answered my question, albeit unintentionally. I stood up after I had raided the hole for every last gem. Rarity quickly pointed to another spot where I quickly began to dig.

We sat in the fields for maybe two hours before I stood up and wiped my brow with a mucky hand. “Ugh…” I groaned, wishing I had brought a canteen or something.

“Oh darling, you must be parched! Here,” Rarity offered me a bottle of water which I graciously accepted.

“Thanks,” I wheezed and quickly sucked back half the bottle’s contents. I waved the bottle, offering her some, but she gave a disgruntled facial look as she saw the muck I had gotten on the bottle.

“Mmm… no thank you darling, you enjoy it.” She stepped back with a hesitant laugh, not wanting to get herself dirty. I slurped back the rest of the contents, some of the water trickling down my neck and dampening the collar of my shirt that laid underneath my heavy jacket.

I hadn’t quite noticed but my entire back was soaked with sweat and was rather uncomfortable. “Darling, I must say you are an invaluable worker to me and I have no idea how I could ever pay you back. If there’s anything you want… Anything, just let me know and I’ll be more than willing to oblige,” she offered with a flutter of her eyes.

I looked down to my now empty water bottle which had barely even wet my tongue. My throat was as dry as a desert and it didn’t feel good. For an April day, even if it was the end of the month, this was rather on the hot side. “Anything?” I asked, though my voice was wheezy.

“Anything your heart desires darling,” she informed me. I waved my water bottle.

“I could use some more waters” I spoke in a raspy voice and she was, weirdly enough, thrown off by the request.

“Water? That’s all you want? Everything I could offer you and you ask for water?” She sounded a little weird but, then again, maybe the sun was getting to her too.

“Yeah… it’s kind of hot out,” I whispered. Without warning, a magical aura grasped my jacket and unzipped it, then flung it off, along with pulling my shirt off. Before I could say anything, a water bottle was tossed my way.

I caught it and nodded my thanks to her. “Are you still hot?” she asked and I nodded somewhat. As I closed my eyes to suck back the contents of the bottle, a sudden gush of water flushed over top of my head and I gasped in shock as cold water drenched my body in several streams.

It would’ve been nice, had the streams not been icy cold. “GAH!” I gasped loudly as shivers went down my back. “Rarity!” I gasped with yet another shiver as I looked above me to see four water bottles pouring down cold water.

“Refreshing darling?” she asked in a dreamy voice. I crossed my arms.

“Wet,” I stated in an unamused voice. The bottles quickly drained while I frowned. The ground behind me started to rumbled and crumble a bit. I turned behind me just as it stopped.

“An earthquake?” I muttered to myself, wondering just what the hell that could’ve been. Suddenly there was a scream from behind me. I whirled around to see Rarity getting snatched by a pair of humanlike dogs.

“We’ve told you to stay out of our territory!” It screeched as it pulled her down a hole.

“EH!” I yelled before rushing over. Just before I could reach the hole, the burrow itself seemed to close up like a sinkhole. I gasped and turned to another one but they all seemed to seal shut.

I frantically looked for something and spotted my opportunity. A younger looking dog was just making his escape. I charged forwards and, when I was within range, I lept through the air and ground tackled him, hard.

He whimpered as I plowed his face into the ground with all my might. “The fuck’s the meaning of this?!” I roared but he simply continued to whimper. I rolled him over, unsheathed my hand cannon, and hammered the barrel into his snout.

“Listen closely ‘cause I’m only gonna say this once! You tell me why the fuck they just snatched my friend, or my personal buddy here plays plastic surgeon with your face!” I yelled and he cringed.

“Please don’t,” the dog whimpered in a feminine voice. I groaned. Now I felt a little bit bad because she was a bitch. “We were just following our orders. Every pony knows this is diamond dog territory,” she wept and I thought back to all the stupid stories Twilight had told me.

Her nose was bleeding a little as I stood up and offered her my hand. “What are you going to do?” she asked but I shrugged.

“Nothing really. I heard Rarity has done this before. She’ll just whine and complain until they release her,” I chuckled but she gulped.

“Maybe. But the new boss might not tolerate her if she doesn’t obey him. He’s a tyrant,” she warned me and I let out a disgruntled sigh.

“Ohh shit…” I whispered then looked to her nose which was bleeding more profusely. She didn't quite look like the other dogs. The other ones looked more like some kind of stubby snout dog, maybe an ugly Pug or something. This one looked more like a German Shepherd.

I could tell her nose hurt because tears were trailing down her cheeks. I grabbed her tight. “Hold on,” I told her then grabbed my shirt off the ground and dribbled some of the little water I had left onto a sleeve before applying it to her wet nose to try and get it to relax.

“I’m not much of a doctor, but cold usually helps,” I stated then offered her the rest of the water. She was hesitant at first but quickly slurped it back.

“Thank you,” she whispered so softly I couldn’t even understand what she had said.

“Huh?” I asked and she whispered a bit louder.

“Thank you. We barely get water down in the mines. I’m always very thirsty. So I’m giving you my thanks, regardless of what you chose to do with me,” she informed me and I nodded.

“Not much. I just need you to get me down there…” I trailed off as brutal memories of Tristan returned to mind. This tyrant, like Tristan, sounded awful. “How many of you are like henchmen? That would stand by his side?” I asked, wondering what I was up against.

“Only a few of us hate him, the others all love him. The ones who are reluctant to him always work the hardest.” I cursed to myself then looked to her.

“As soon as we get down there, rally the others and get out. I don’t need collateral damage,” I told her and her eyes went wide. I ripped off the cold, wet part of my shirt then wrapped it around her snout. “The white flag, so I know it’s you,” I told her then slipped on my tattered shirt, then my jacket over top.

She nodded and gulped before quickly beginning to dig. I hopped down the hole after her but barely fit; my hulking size was just barely able to sneak down. It was so tight that I had to squirm to get down.

“Cons of being big. I can’t fit in holes,” I muttered as I continued to squirm down the hole. Finally we reached the caverns and both of us fell. Just as I stood, several dog things surrounded me, spears edging at my neck.

“Good work,” one of the dogs said to my accomplice. ‘Did she set me up? No she couldn’t have... unless she was like a double agent or something…’ I wondered to myself as the one dog pointed to my firearm.

“What is that? You!” He pointed to another dog. “Grab it!” he shouted and the other dog ripped Belladonna from her sheath. They examined it closely but never once even got her close to operating. “What is this?” the dog shouted and I quickly thought up a convenient lie.

“It’s an artificial vagina,” I lied fluently and the dog raised a suspicious eyebrow before looking down the muzzle.

“I doubt it. That’s a small hole,” he snarked but I just shrugged.

“You ever wonder how I’m so big? I use steroids. I got big muscles in exchange for a tiny penis. That hole fits me perfectly… oh, I haven’t cleaned it yet and I just used it recently,” I told them and he gasped before tossing the gun at me.

I grabbed her and put her back in her holster. “Pretty fancy for just a pocket pussy,” one of the dogs snarled suspiciously.

“I can’t offer pleasure to any female I’m with so I keep the one thing that doesn’t complain in good condition,” I continued my lie with fluency and it paid off.

“Bring him to the cell!” the dog, whom I presumed to be the leader of this group, ordered. They shoved me over to a cell, tied my hands up in rope, and then strung me up high. Locking the cell gate behind me with a padlock, the group left me alone, my accomplice giving me one last glance and a nod.

I heard yelling in the distance of the cave and listened closely, my senses seeming to hit a new high that I had never experienced before.

* * *

Third person…

Rarity turned her snout up as the lead diamond dog snarled at her. He closely resembled a massive Pitbull. He had massive frame work and was very imposing to the mare who, compared to him, was rather tiny. “I said do it!” he roared, but Rarity still refused.

“I will not!” she spat, but rather than continue to rant at her like the leader before, he simply backhanded her to the ground. Her body hit the ground with a thump, a slap mark clearly visible on her cheek.

She gasped in shock as tears trickled down her face. “Now dig, you stupid mule!” he roared. Rarity sulked herself up and picked up the shovel then began to take small chunks of dirt out of the ground.

A whip slashed across her back, making her yelp in pain. “I SAID DIG, MULE!” he roared louder than ever before, making Rarity cringe in pain, both from the whip slash and his voice.

Author's Note

Okay, before anyone asks "WHEN IS HE GOING TO PUT HIS DICK IN TWILIGHT" Just sit back for a second and think. This whole character is revolving around the fact that he's dumb as a sack of bricks, if I just pulled that from him then he's not Burdy. Now a lot of you will say "Nothing's happening between Burdy and Twilight" and if you take the blunt picture of their relationship... yeah, it kind of hasn't gone anywhere other than Burdy having some serious mom issues, but if you flip over that picture, you'll see that he's gone really far with his character transition. I mean, when he first arrived he was a brash dick. Everything was 'Gay' to him and he pretty much refused to speak with most ponies or even socialize. But just recently he rushed into a burning building to save a filly. As much as it sounds bad, if it had've been in the beginning, Burdy would've just looked at the burning barn, shrugged and figured "Meh, it's not my problem." So yeah, Twilight and Burdy's relationship hasn't really went anywhere beyond the mom thing, but his character has changed dramatically, so much so that he's risking his life for ponies. Anyway, that's just my thoughts on it...

Chapter 19

‘Not again…’

I had no idea what time it was…

A punch hammered my exposed ribs, making me cringe and groan in pain. Blood trickled down my lips and sides. Small cuts and bruises littered the sides of my torso as the feral hound dog laid a beating into me. Again and again he’d pummel my helpless body with brutish punches.

I tried breathing in short strides so that my ribcage wouldn’t have to expand all that much during inhales. The way my arms were tied were no help and left me short for breath. The diamond dog snickered as he cracked his knuckles. “Oooh… you’re sooo much fun… not like ponies,” he sneered then slammed me again with yet another punch.

He had removed my t-shirt and jacket during the beating and simply tossed them aside, stating that he wanted to see his results. Luckily he had left my pants on along with my holster and pistol, although he was under the premise that it was a pocket pussy. A punch slammed across my face, stinging the heavy bruise that already painted my left eye.

I simply let both eyes shut, moaning in pain as I dangled about, suspended by the ropes that tied my hands together. Another relentless punch connected with my mouth, knocking my head back.

I grunted in continued pain as the metallic taste of blood tainted my mouth. I left my head cocked back as I swallowed deeply, my blood leaving a horrid aftertaste. “Why…” I whispered in a croaky voice, but the diamond dog just shrugged.

“I dunno. Kinda feels good,” he replied before slamming a punch into my gut, making me gag and twist as the wind was knocked out of me. I gasped in shock as my lungs refused to operate properly.

I gagged slightly before posturing myself. “You… weren’t always… like this,” I whispered with a wince of pain, but he just shrugged.

“You’re right, we weren’t. But our new boss showed us that this way we’re more fearsome. Ponies don’t bother us and, when they do… they leave an example for the others…” he trailed off, licked his thumb, then clenched his fist.

He stepped back and hammered a maddening punch into my forehead. I heard his knuckles crunch, followed by a yelp of pain. Stars blurred my vision as I watched him stagger back in agony, holding his busted hand. All the while, he was muttering curses to himself as he paced around me in a furious and pain filled rage.

“Oh you… you… you’re gonna get it now!” he screeched, holding his hand tight to try and foolishly alleviate the pain from his obviously broken knuckles. He stepped forwards and readied himself in an awkward stance. He was obviously not used to using his less dominant hand to hit with.

“This… this is gonna hurt… a lot!” he warned me. I swallowed deep and readied myself. He readied his fist and winded back for a punch. Just as he leaned back, I grunted and pulled myself upwards into a chin-up while at the same time thrusting my right foot forwards.

My steel toed boot tip hammered him in the jaw, knocking him back and onto his ass. A deep exhale escaped my mouth as I let myself dangle once more. My fingers quickly went about to playing with the terrible knot that the dog had tied. It was a simple double loop and within seconds I had undone myself.

My body fell to the floor with a bit of a thump. I grimaced to myself as I scrambled to my feet. The diamond dog was struggling to get up but I never let him think twice about my well being.

I rushed forwards and tackled him into the wall, hard. His gasp filled the room just before I gripped his head with my right hand and thrusted his head into the stone wall. His head clacked off the wall, his body instantly going limp.

I let his body fall to the ground in a heap. He probably wasn’t dead, but I didn’t much care to check, he got what he deserved. I looked to one corner of the room, where my jacket and shirt lay. I grabbed my jacket but left the shirt, it was ripped pretty bad. Slipping on the jacket, I left it unzipped so that it didn’t constrict my sore ribs. Leaving my handgun holstered, I peeked into the hallways.

Moseying through the hallways, I found myself lost in an abyss of underground mazes. “Oh man…” I muttered. I could hear Rarity scream, but I could never figure out which way it came from. The screams seemed to come from every direction. The corridors were gloomy and barely lit. I constantly found myself feeling the walls to try and find my way.

I tried to think to myself about what I should do…

Time seemed to slow as hairs pricked up on the back of my neck. Without a second thought, I ducked. Just as my head lowered, a large stalactite was swung where my head had been only moments before.

I pivoted my body in a one-eighty clockwise motion, hammering him with a tight jab from my left, followed by a heavy haymaker with my right. The diamond dog whom had managed to sneak up on me staggered back, grasping his head to try and orient himself.

I clenched both hands in front of me, and then struck with a trio of straight punches, all of which connected with his cheeks. Staggering back just a little further, I unclenched my right hand and readied for what would appear to be a palm strike.

I lunged forwards, letting myself come a little closer than arm’s length. Striking forwards with my right palm, I surged my palm into his throat then gripped it tightly, my fingers digging into his neck. He gagged, now completely immobilized as I restricted his windpipe.

I pivoted my left foot behind me, all the while sneaking my right leg to his right side then striking it behind his legs and finally slamming him into the ground. Easing off on the tension to his throat, I whispered my demands.

“Where is she?! The pony?” I fumed, but he simply gagged, tapping on my hand to try and get me to ease off some more. I placed my right knee on his chest then eased off with my restricting grip.

“The… main room,” he gasped. I drew out Belladonna and cocked back her hammer before placing the barrel up to his forehead.

“Show me, and if you try anything stupid… my personal buddy plays plastic surgeon with your face,” I threatened. He nodded and I stood up, gun leveled on his center mass. “Well… let’s get going, shall we?” I offered.

He held his hands slightly into the air while leading me along. “Please… just don’t kill me!” he pleaded for his life. I tilted my gun to and fro as I made it look like I was contemplating the decision.

“Oh well… I dunno. You kidnap my friend… take me prisoner… nearly beat me to a pulp-“ I started but he made quick work to cut me off.

“Please, that wasn’t me! I don’t even like this new boss!” he squealed in his defense.

“So why haven’t you joined the resistance?” I asked and he gulped.
“Well… well… well I… well you see…” he stammered while still trying to buy time and think of an excuse. I kept a straight face on while still training my aim on his back.

“Well what?” I asked, still making it out like I was contemplating the option.

“Well it’s just that… you get treated really badly if you don’t give full allegiance to the new boss… I didn’t want to get treated bad!” he cried and I just rolled my eyes. We strolled down another hallway and accidentally bumped into several other hounds.

They turned to me with shocked eyes. I aimed my sights to the roof above their heads and fired. The thunderous report of my hand cannon echoed throughout the caverns while the heavy slug pummeled the roof and littered light debris down upon the canines.

They looked to me with now frightened eyes. “Get the fuck outta my way!” I yelled and they quickly complied without a second glance. I turned my attention back to my guide and rekindled the topic we had recently been on.

“So… as you were saying?” I asked and he shivered fearfully.

“I… I had no choice. Please, I don’t have a family, but I want one! PLEASE DON’T KILL ME!” He began to cry as we continued along. I let out an irritated sigh. Finally we arrived into a large room where a brutish looking diamond dog whipped my friend.

A handful of other dogs watched and cackled in humor as my friend was whipped again and again. I looked briefly to my escort. “Go on, get outta here…” I told him. ‘I was never gonna kill you anyway,’ I mentally added in.

He scurried away with haste as I stepped into the large open room, handgun at the ready. Before they noticed the new presence, I lined up a shot with the wall near their heads.

The echo of the gunshot was extreme, and deafened me slightly. They all looked over to me with shocked expressions. I kept my sights lined up with them, the triangular muzzle of my mighty hand cannon still wisping out smoke. “Let. Her. Go,” I snarled in a deep tone. The crew of dogs all scurried away in a fume of dust, but the one who was whipping my friend remained.

“Bold… but stupid,” he snarked. I merely shrugged, Belladonna’s sights now trained on his chest.

“Funny… I could say the same for you,” I taunted.

“But cowardly,” he chipped in and I snickered.

“Indeed. Kidnapping a pony and whipping her. Doesn’t get much worse than that,” I added to the insult, but he just spat to one side. I managed a quick glance to Rarity. She had several whip marks. They were mean looking but not deep and probably wouldn’t leave much of a scar.

He took my undivided attention as he began to speak. “I meant you. You’d kill a defenseless creature, without so much as giving it a fighting chance,” he quipped but I just smirked.

“You’re no better,” I countered, but he nodded with a sly grin, presenting his open hand towards Rarity, as if to show me some grand achievement.

“Oh but I am. I did not kill her, but merely whipped her into working. I simply showed her who to respect,” he informed me, like it was some sort of righteous moral thing.

“Well… in that case… maybe I’ll just shoot out your kneecaps. Show you who to respect... who to bow to,” I replied. His brows lowered in anger.

“You would… you… you coward,” he snarled. “You could never suffice in a fight against someone like me... you… weakling,” he boasted. “You wouldn’t be masculine enough to take me on.”

‘Weakling? A WEAKLING?!’ my mind boomed in anger. ‘He calls me a weakling after he whips Rarity?!’ My lips curled as my nose scrunched back. My thumb moved to the hammer of my pistol.

I depressed the hammer and set Belladonna aside. “EVAN! DON’T!” Rarity cried, but a whip lashed out, slashing her across the back and silencing her with haste. The whip made a nasty slashing noise that made it sound very gruesome.

“You’re gonna feel… every single mark you put on her…” I trailed off, clenching both my hands into fists. As my body tightened, my jacket stretched to accommodate my size. A smile crept across his lips, no doubt from the fact that he had conned me into a fist fight.

He charged forwards with great force, but wasn’t expecting my next move. I took a step back with my right foot then swung it low. My steel toed boot connected with his left side, making his body arch. Without actually setting my foot down, I swung it back then hammered it up high, connecting a kick with the side of his head.

He staggered back while I re-postured myself. “Lucky hit!” He rumbled forwards like some sort of juggernaut. I went to pummel a kick to his head, but he simply plowed through me like I was a soap bubble.

My body was sent skidding across the ground. I swept myself up, once again posting myself into a fighting stance. His head shook side to side, his right foot scraping across the ground like an angry bull.

He was built thick… maybe I underestimated this guy a little… maybe a lot. He was hulking and could easily hold his own with me. If I made one simple mistake that he took advantage of… this would be over before it began.

‘No more slipups Burdy…’ my conscience whispered. I rolled my eyes. “Yeah… like I need you to tell me that,” I quipped. The hulking diamond dog tilted his head to one side in wonder.

“Tell you what?!” he grumbled but I ignored him, pacing towards him with careful precaution. Just as I neared him, he began to barrel forwards again. I waited patiently for my moment.

Finally, just as he dipped his head to barrel into me, I twirled my body to the right with a three-sixty spin, completely dodging his charge. He hammered head-on into a wall, creating a small crater into the stone barrier.

Stumbling back, he tried painfully to regain balance. I charged towards him, lept into the air, and then delivered a painful roundhouse kick to his head. He collapsed to the ground with a thump, but it wasn’t long before he was back up.

I kept my distance, not really wanting to figure out just how strong he really was. He held his arms in a wide arc, almost like some sort of grizzly bear trying to give a hug. I stepped back as he approached.

He kept getting closer and again I stepped back. Just as he got close, I darted to the left and under his armpit. He swooped down as if to grab me, but missed horribly. His muscles started to swell, gaining even more muscle mass.

Before, there was a bit of thought between whether or not he was stronger, but now… now there was no doubt. He could crush me like a robin egg. He raised his arms into the air and flexed, letting out a roar that shook the ground beneath me.

“NOW… NOW I CRUSH YOU!” His voice echoed like thunder. I just grimaced to myself.

‘Why did I allow myself to get conned into this?’ I thought while the massive, hulking horror stormed towards me. He was slower than ever, but his muscle mass was just crushingly intimidating.

He cocked back with his right and swung a powerful punch at me. I ducked, swooping to the left. Hitting first with my right, then with my left, I hammered a one-two into his gut. I stopped and gasped, realizing that his muscles had become incredibly dense.

I looked up to see him cocking his left arm high into the air. “GUH!” I gasped, jumping and rolling to one side. His hand came crashing down, smashing a large crater into the ground where I had previously been.

He slowly turned towards me, fury in his eyes. “Rarity… RUN!” I yelled. She didn’t answer, and I gambled a glance to her. She was petrified from the mere sight of the beast, so much so that she was stuck in place. “RARITY, FOR THE LOVE OF CELESTIA! RU-U-U-U-U-N!”

She blinked then gulped. “EVAN! LOOK OUT!” she screamed. I didn’t even have time to react as a painful strike hammered my side. The sheer kinetic force sent me careening across the room, slamming me into a wall with ruthless force.

My body fell to the ground in a clump. The footsteps of the beast boomed towards me. I managed to look up. This diamond dog was still the height of a regular diamond dog, but its body mass… it had changed so dramatically.

His hands grabbed the back of my left leg and tossed me to the other side of the room. My body crashed into the unforgiving wall with a brutal impact force. I groaned in pain while managing to crack open my left eye. Blood trickled down and stung my vision.

Rarity had her mouth agape as she watched me in fear of what my fate might be. The big lug hulked towards me. I hauled myself to my feet, wiping my left hand across my lower lip to remove the blood that had accumulated.

The beast cocked back his right hand and hammered it towards me. In the last possible moment, I shifted my left hand to the outside of his strike then my right to the inside of his elbow. I snugged his punch tight and pulled it just under my left shoulder, letting it swing harmlessly under my armpit and pulling his momentum force onto me.

Pivoting my stance, I pulled a 180 degree spin and ducked under his armpit, now side by side with the beast. I yanked his arm over my right shoulder then heaved his body over mine. His back slammed into the ground as I backpedaled. He grunted loudly as he stood to his feet, wincing slightly as he rubbed the back of his head.

He turned his glance to me, but I was already moving. I hammered a straight punch into his face with all the strength I could muster. The kinetic force staggered him back, disorienting him for the moment.

Stepping back then leaping forwards, I spun my body and delivered a mid-flight kick that connected with the side of his head. His body crumpled and fell, but I lost my balance as I landed, tripping and falling face first into the dirt.

I scrambled to my feet but was greeted with a heel to the head. My body was propelled back and I was slammed into a wall. I grimaced in pain, my eyes clenched shut to try and ignore the pain my body was experiencing.

Suddenly a great force plummeted into me, pinning me against the wall and squeezing the air from my lungs. I wheezed, blood spitting out from my mouth as the hulkish hound attempted to crush my body in his arms.

His shoulders pressed into my chest while his arms wrapped just under my armpits, restricting my body from the ability to breathe. I squirmed while his muscles started to constrict me further.

Gathering what little strength I had left, I raised my right arm into the air then drove my elbow downwards. My elbow slammed into the top of his skull and I felt his grip loosen. I hammered again and I heard him grunt feverishly.

With one final blow, his grip around me was released and I fell to the ground, gasping violently for fresh air. The beast held the top of his head, whimpering in pain. I stood up just as the dog stepped back.

“Come on pooch, I haven’t even gotten warmed up yet,” I taunted. Truth be told, I was almost gassed. He had literally nearly squeezed the life from me just there.

The beast clenched his fists and let out an ear piercing roar that nearly shook the cavern room. Just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse, his muscles grew slightly. His biceps swelled to an unparalleled might while veins started to ripple down his body.

My fists unclasped as I stood in shock. “Oh shit…” was all I managed before he swung a mighty kick in my direction. I brought both my arms up and blocked the kick, but the force still flung me across the room, hammering me into yet another unforgiving stone wall.

I winced and rolled to one side just as a foot stomped down upon me. I missed the stomp by mere inches, but the shockwave force lifted my body off the ground and I bounced a few feet across the floor.

I rolled onto my back and my eyes went wide. He was right above me. He dove down with his upper body and grabbed me by the waist before pulling me into the air. I struggled in his arms, but it was no use. I felt my world spin as he jumped into a back flip, but made sure to crush me between his body and the floor.

I groaned painfully as I felt him lift me up with one hand and then hammer my body with his other. He then hammered a second punch into my forehead, but as the hit struck, he released his grip on my body and let me careen through the air.

My body touched ground, skidding across the floor in painful skips. I struggled to get up, but only found myself on my hands and knees. “You are strong… but not as strong as me!” the big brute howled.

He picked me up on his shoulders, his head in front of my body. He lept up and tilted his body backwards. Pulling his arms forwards, he bent my body a little just before my back was slammed into the unforgiving ground.

I could barely even manage a groan before the dog rolled over, grabbed one of my feet, and swung my body across the room. I didn’t even bother tensing up to try and absorb some of the impact.

My body simply slapped against the wall and fell into a lump on the ground. As he stomped his way over, I watched his stance. His arms were wide, as if to ready himself to grab me. He was also slow… slower now that his mass had increased and his bulky muscles restricted quick movement.

I bit my lip. I had no energy left. I was… a failure. My eyes clenched closed as time seemed to slow. Painful memories returned to me…

‘You’re a failure!’ screamed a voice from a distant memory. My fists clenched. I had failed… again… like the many times I had before.

‘You’re an idiot… just a fucking retard, DURR!’ yelled a painful and hurtful voice. I whimpered in anger as a deep inhale sucked through my nostrils. My biceps tensed as memories continued to flood my mind.

‘You’ll never go anywhere, cause you’re a fucking idiot!’ screamed the same voice from before. A fury from deep inside… somewhere deep down… something that I had thought gone… resurfaced. Memories of Tristan burned into my mind and snapped the final boundary.

The fury burned in my body as a snarl escaped my lips. My eyes shot open as the anger inside me surfaced. It felt good… no… it felt great. Everything seemed to have a sharper definition to it. My chest swelled out as I took in yet another deep breath.

My mind burned in anger… in pain… in inner turmoil, and above all else… I had a burning and furious hatred that swelled itself inside my heart, ready to burst. I swiveled to my feet in fueled hatred.

I swung back my hand but let my fist unclasp. I slashed my hand forwards, striking my nails across the dog’s upper face. It screeched in pain as it staggered back, its hands covering its face. Looking to my fingernails, I spotted blood under the nailS and smiled.

“FREEZE!” yelled a voice and I looked over. The dog whom had guided me here had snatched up my pistol and was now pointing it at me. Several other dogs had joined him and there were seven in all.

“HIYAH!” screamed a rather feminine voice. A streak of white flashed through the air and the gun was booted from his grip. Rarity pivoted on her hindlegs alone, swinging in a counter-clockwise spin.

She kicked out her right hindleg and swung a nasty kick into the diamond dog’s jaw, punting him into a wall. His head smacked off the stone and he fell in a heap, completely unconscious.

The other mutts looked to her as she took a martial artist stance. I smirked to myself as I watched her pounce through the air, kicking three mutts in the head while still airborne.

“What a dame,” I whispered to myself as I turned my attention back to the hulking beast that was my primary threat. He had managed to regain some of his vision and was stomping towards me.

I moved with quick precision. My right hand jabbed into his gut just as I ducked to the left, under his right armpit. He grunted and tried to swing at me, but I swung my body around and jumped onto his hunched back.

I began to pummel the back of his head as he thundered around like a buffoon. Finally, I planted my feet against his back and pushed myself off, landing on my feet and wiping off my lower lip.

Blood tainted my mouth with a nasty brass taste, but the rage that burned inside me kept my senses razor sharp. He turned to face me and we both charged, attempting to grab one another. Both our hands connected, interlocking and pushing against one another.

We both roared in each others’ faces as we pushed, each trying to overpower one another in a show of muscular strength. He ran off his brute and raw might while I… I ran off a raging fury that boiled my insides.

Our grip on each other tightened further, veins bulging from our muscles. Finally, despite my rage induced fury, he began to slowly overpower me. He took an effortful step forwards, sliding my feet backwards.

He took another step, then another, and another. I dug my feet into the ground, but he started to push downwards. My elbows started to give as my body was pushed down. My elbows began to cock and finally reached a ninety degree angle.

My knees began to buckle and I was forced down to a kneel. He pushed my arms further down, my elbows now pushed down to my sides. I twisted my palms upside down, twisting his hands as well. He was at first shocked, giving me just enough time.

I slid both my feet towards him, making sure to place my legs on the outsides of his hips. I snatched my right arm for his right, grabbing it by the triceps, pulling it over my chest and to my right shoulder. I held his hand with my left, keeping it suppressed.

My hips raised while my left foot planted on his hips. He gasped in shock, not sure what was happening. He tried to quickly pull his arm away but it got locked into my left leg, which was still planted to his hip.

I raised my right leg up under his shoulder while the calf of my leg pressed across the back of his shoulder, pressing down to lock his shoulder into place. He squirmed, but now his left arm was also immobilized. My right hand held his right arm down hard while my left pushed back on his face.

He grunted, trying painfully to break free as I pushed his body back. As his face was held back, my left leg quickly aborted its stance on his hips and snagged up and over his head, now driving down on his neck.

I straightened my body, pushing his body back. He whined in pain as I outstretched his body to its limit in a classic arm bar. With anger still boiling inside, I used my right arm to twist his arm and expose his elbow.

I pulled back with my left hand then thrusted it forwards, severing his elbow and snapping it in a grotesque manner. His screams of agony quickly filled the room as he squirmed, trying in vain to break free.

I released him from the hold and slid back, up to my feet, then took a few steps back. Grunting and cringing in severe pain, the beast arose, cradling its busted limb. “Well now… I’m warmed up. Shall we begin?” I taunted before rushing forwards, jumping into the air and delivering a powerful midair punch to his forehead.

‘You’re a fucking idiot!’ The painful voice of my memories returned yet again.

The beast fell back, dazed and unable to regain his balance. I lunged onto his chest before clenching both fists. “IDIOT THIS MOTHERFUCKER!” I roared before I began to slam the bottoms of my fists into his skull.

A burning passion blossomed inside me. I had this insatiable urge to just… kill him. To smash his skull into the ground. To rip him limb from limb. The urge was like no other I’d had before… maybe like the tetanus potion, but this was no side effect. This was a natural urge.

Time seemed to slow into a blur as I continued to bash his head. My swearing and curses echoed throughout the tunnel system. Mostly it just consisted of quick, repetitive: fuck you, or a small variation.

Something was tugging at the back of my mind, trying to pull me out of this blood lust. It kept screaming… and screaming… and crying... and sobbing.

“EVAN!” I suddenly broke out of the rage. Time seemed to return to normal. The hazy red blur that had tainted my vision evaporated. I had my right fist high, ready to crush the beast’s skull in with the final blow.

“Evan… please… just sto-op,” Rarity whimpered through a sob. I looked down to the diamond dog. His face was badly bruised, welted, and bleeding from the snout and lips. My hands shook and quivered as they unclasped in front of me.

Blood… mostly his, smeared my hands. Rarity moved cautiously behind me and rested her forehooves in my right elbow crevice. “It’s over… just please… no more,” she whimpered in a petrified voice.

The dog was alive, barely, but was breathing heavily through his mouth. I got off him, standing and wobbling a bit as I tried to balance myself. “Rarity… I… I-“ She quickly cut me off.

“Please darling, just… let it go,” she pleaded for me to spare his life. I just stumbled back, a look of saddened shock on my face. I ended up collapsing on the floor near the wall and just leaned my back against it.

Rarity paced over and laid against me, her head resting on my chest. “Darling just… it’ll be okay… just let it go,” she cooed me. My eyes were wide as I looked to the mess I had made. Truly, I had wanted to kill him, but… not like that.

Maybe I was becoming soft. Back on my world I probably would’ve done worse had someone mercilessly whipped a close friend of mine. But now I could barely stomach the idea of beating some… something to death. It wasn’t even a pony. But... it didn't feel right... to think like that... something deep down wanted me to but... the majority of my conscious just wanted me to let him live.

A group of diamond dogs entered, but my nerves were at ease. The leader of the group had a white parcel of tattered shirt wrapped around her upper muzzle. “Come on, we’ll show you the exit, hurry!” she ordered.

Both Rarity and I stood up, though now I was feeling rather sore. Nothing seemed to be broken, but I was willing to bet that I’d feel this in the morning.

Retrieving my handgun and holstering it, we followed the dogs out of the mine and to the surface. The leader, my accomplice, turned to me. “Thank you for freeing us. Perhaps one day our paths will cross again… in a less aggressive situation… I’d like that.” She smiled and I returned the gesture.

“I’d like that too.” She nodded and, with that, the group split up and all went their separate ways. Now only Rarity and I stood in the field, back where she had been kidnapped. Her belongings were still there, along with the gems.

I quickly resurfaced the topic on my mind. “Rarity, about back there, I-“ She cut me off rather quickly.

“Darling… whatever happened… I’ve never seen something like that. I thought for sure that you were exhausted and then… you scared me. Your eyes looked like… you were possessed. I don’t want to know, and perhaps we should just pretend none of this ever happened.” There was a silence before I nodded. I had only had this happen once or twice before, and neither of those times had positive results. They only ended in bloodshed.

“Okay… good amount of gems we picked up, huh? Nothing beats a hard day’s work!” I said enthusiastically with a bloody smile. She just rolled her eyes before swaying herself towards me, falling forwards and into my arms.

“Oh darling… I can’t walk, I’m exhausted!” She flailed her hooves and wiped her brow. I raised my eyebrows as my body burned in retort from her weight on me.

“Seriously? After what my body’s been through, you want me to carry you?” I asked, rather rhetorically. She gave me a pouty face.

“Oh but darling… my body is sooo exhausted. Would you please be a dear?” She pleaded, eyes fluttering at me and bottom lip pouted out. I let out a sigh and she took that as a yes. She quickly hopped into my arms, levitating her gems in a magical aura.

* * *

Later, Twilight’s perspective…

I browsed through ’69 Shades of Neigh’. Like Evan had said, it was very… descriptive. Several times I had to stop reading for some… alone time.

Luckily for me, both Spike and Evan were still absent, so I didn’t have to worry about either of them hearing me while I relieved myself.

“ ‘Let me ask you something first. Do you want a vanilla relationship with no kinky fuckery at all?’ ” I muttered the story to myself, in a rather quiet and subtle voice. My own loins started to quiver again. I wondered if things would heat up…

The door suddenly opened to the entrance of the library and my ears shot up in attention. I heard muffled groans that sounded as if they were a bit painful.

I snuck a marker on the page I was on then stuffed my book under my bed mattress before leaving to investigate. I poked my head out of my room to observe the library. There was mucks of dirt on the floor.

“Ugh… Evan! Never kicks off his boots,” I muttered to myself. I trotted down the stairs in search for my… ‘faithful’ student. I tried following the dirt trail, but it stopped near the middle of the floor, then ceased to exist.

Groaning to myself, I decided to check his room. I puttered towards his room before stopping in mid trot. A glint of red on the floor caught my attention. I leaned down to see that the red was… blood?!

“EVAN?!” I called out frantically. Praying to myself that it wasn’t bad, I rushed down the basement stairs and into his room, only to find it vacant of his presence. “EVAN?!” I called again, rushing back up the stairwell.

There was a vocal grunt from inside the washroom, loud enough that I heard it over my thumping heart. Rushing in without knocking, I spotted my dear student… in brutal shape.

His jacket and shirt were missing, and his pants were dusty and ripped in several spots. Blood stained some spots on his pant leg while his torso… bruises, cuts, and hit marks covered over half of his upper body. His left eye was swollen with a purple bruise and his bottom lip was split. His upper lip wasn’t damaged, but there was a bruise on one of his cheeks.

More blood oozed from his forehead as he looked to me, an alcohol swab already being applied to his forehead. His arms proved no better as there were several cuts along his arms, not deep but still present.

“Evan… oh my goddess!” I rushed up in shock, quickly observing one of his wounds.

“AGH!” he boomed, pulling away in wincing agony. “Don’t grab me so hard, I’m a little tender,” he chuckled before letting out a pained exhale. "UGH... oh man." He was having trouble breathing as he applied the alcohol swabs to his numerous injuries.

“What… what happened?” I gasped and he just shrugged.

“I understand now why Rarity doesn’t do the dirty work,” he laughed and my eyes widened. Spike had never come back this brutalized. What in Equestria did Rarity have him do?

His wounds continued to bleed and I discarded the topic. “Evan…” I trailed off and dipped my head in remorse. I was becoming a terrible teacher. My student was constantly getting injured in near death experiences.

I gently pressed my hoof against his battered chest. His eyes clenched shut as he winced. “I’m so sorry,” I whispered, but he shook his head.

“Nah, don’t be. Rarity was the one who pulled me into this,” he laughed, but I stepped back.

“I’ll get you to the hospital-“ I began but he cut me off so fast, I barely even understood what he said.

“Nuh-uh!”

My eyebrows raised. “What? Why not?” I asked and he stuttered out an answer.

“The library’s full,” he stammered. I leaned back in confusion but he shook his head, trying to piece together his thoughts into words. “I meant… uhm… I can’t because… I wouldn’t want to take up valuable space. It’s not that bad,” he told me and my jaw dropped.

“Evan! Your wounds are… they look painful,” I told him but he just smirked before rolling his eyes, taking me into a gentle hug.

“Don’t worry. It’s worse than it looks… OH WAIT! I meant… you know… not bad. Trust me Mom, I’m okay,” he assured me.

‘Oh great… the mom thing,’ I thought to myself. I had tried to talk to him about it but… every time he gets emotional and I get scared that I might lose him as a friend. I’d probably never know what’s wrong with him, but I’ll just go with it for now.

“Well…” I began, leaning back from the hug. “Let mommy have a look,” I told him, hoping to perhaps settle him a little. He painfully sat down on the closed toilet seat while I pulled out some medical supplies.

Together we began wrapping up his wounds. I spotted several deep scars on his body, scars I never knew existed. I suppose I wouldn’t have known they were there since he usually wore clothing, but as I got close to his face, I noticed a faint scar going down the right side of his forehead. It passed down through his eyebrow, removing the hair where it passed, missed his eye but continued down a few millimeters on his cheek.

Taking nothing of it, I finished wrapping him up. Now he looked almost like he did when he was burned… wrapped in bandages and lotion creams. He took me into a loving hug.

“Thank you Mom… I love you,” he whispered. I gulped as I pulled his body into mine, making sure not to squeeze him too tight.

“I love you too,” I began, quickly remembering his… mom thing. “Son,” I finished, tapping into his weird mental thingy. We hugged for a while longer before he broke from the hug.

“I know I said I’d read that book with you as soon as I got back, but… it’s kind of late and I really just wanted to go to bed,” he stated and I nodded. It was quite late, I would admit.

He groaned as he stood up. Despite his injuries, he still moved rather freely. He leaned down and gave me a peck to the cheek. “Good night, love ya,” he whispered then moved towards the stairwell. I sighed silently as I raised my hoof to my cheek.

With a sigh, I moved towards my own bedroom. ‘One day Twilight… one day,’ I silently assured myself.

As I reached my sleeping quarters, my body began to shut down even before I had flopped onto my bed mattress. By the time my body actually touched the bed, I was already asleep.

* * *

Hours later…

My sleep was peaceful yet empty, though that didn’t disturb me. Suddenly something was tugging at my blankets. I awoke with a heavy drowse. Looking to my clock, I saw that it was only 2:30am.

A small whine was emitted from the creature tugging at my sheets. It was Lassie…

“Well hello there Lassie. How are-“ I began but a tremendous roar immediately cut me off.

“I’LL FUCKING GUT YOU!” roared the voice, making me flinch. Despite knowing that Lassie and I were the only ones in my room, it sounded as if it had come from right in front of my bed.

A loud crash echoed in the house, though again it was hard to depict where it had come from. More cursing echoed in booming roars. ‘WHAT IN CELESTIA’S NAME IS GOING ON?!’ I thought frantically as I bounced out of bed and snuck up to the railing of the stairwell.

Nothing was happening on the main floor. Something else smashed, it sounded heavy, really heavy. Clanging and more crashing noises emitted, but now it sounded more distinct.

“EVAN!” I gasped, leaping off the railing and flying down to the basement door.

“COME AND GET ME YOU FUCKING BITCH! FUCKING COWARDLY LITTLE FUCKING WHORE… FUCKING… BITCH!” screamed an utterly terrifying voice that I think belonged to Evan… I think.

‘Was he talking to me?’ I wondered. I hoped he wasn’t. Very cautiously, I pried open the basement door. Something banged against the wall, followed by the smashing sound of glass. Flinching, I flicked on the lights to the basement.

“EVAN!” I cried out.

Everything went deathly silent. I waited several moments but nothing happened. It was as if time itself had ceased. I slowly, and very cautiously, descended the stairwell. Finally reaching the bottom, I spotted Evan…

My mouth went agape. All his weight training equipment was… overturned. Several weight plates were scattered, one was jammed into the wooden wall. I gulped deeply.

Blood was leaking from his right hand where a shard of glass was protruding. Evan just stood there, completely still. His right arm was cocked back while his left was extended slightly forwards and looked as if he was holding somepony… maybe something, against the wall, where his smashed mirror lay in pieces.

Gasping loudly, he stepped back, body unclasping. “OW! SHIT!” He began to stomp around before yanking the glass from between his middle knuckles. A bit of blood spurted out and he squeezed down hard with his other hand.

“Evan… what… how… are you okay?” I was nearly in tears. What in Equestria was going on?!

“Bad dream,” he replied, almost as if it was nothing…

* * *

Minutes earlier, Evan’s perspective…

My sleep was peaceful and uninterrupted. Maybe I was a bit sore, but I really didn’t care. I lay on my side but something awoke me suddenly.

“Time to come home,” whispered a deathly voice, so quiet that it almost sounded like a simple huff of wind. I rolled onto my back and looked to the bottom end of my bed. A demonic presence stood there, nearly sending shivers to my very soul itself.

The identity of the figure was unknown to me. He or she was a simple cloud of black mist. The only thing I could make out was a pair of dark, hellish red eyes.

“What?” I asked fearfully and the looming dark cloud began to mist over my body. I felt constricted for breath. My lungs felt as if they were filled with thick water vapours or something.

I wheezed for oxygen… this had to be some sort of bad dream… it had to be. “Come home, my friend,” it whispered. A boney cloud that resembled a hand began to hover towards my face. The index finger extended and tears came to my eyes.

Down inside, somewhere deep, my soul lashed out in fury. I felt extremely threatened, like I had a few times back on my world. “Come home with me,” the deathly voice whispered.

An animalistic snarl escaped my mouth as my body lunged up and forwards. Pummeling our bodies off the bed, I let out a monstrous war cry. Clenching my right fist and slamming it into what I believed to be its head, I let out a pained howl as my fist slammed into the cold hard floor.

The mist floated away and I was able to breathe again. “You belong with me,” it whispered while I wiped saliva from my lower lip. I was drooling like a rabid animal as my body arched into a more primal stance. My whole body tensed, muscles now expanding to their maximum.

Painful images flashed through my mind, trying to make me remember something. Every time a near complete memory would surface, my mind fazed and the memory blurred.

“Remember…” it hissed. Releasing my inner torment, I lashed out at the foggy figure.

“FUCK YOU!” I shouted in absolute anger, hammering a punch into its chest. My body simply whisked through the black, dense fog. I pivoted in a one-eighty motion, trying to hammer it with a haymaker, but my punch simply went through it.

The deathly creature outstretched its arms, hands digging into my chest. Suddenly, I felt as if I was dying. My life seemed to drain as it felt like my soul was being pulled right from my body.

I gasped and tried to grip its arms, but my hands simply went through. As my life neared its end, my mind seemed to split. Everything that told me to love and cherish was pushed aside.

Only hatred and pure anger remained. A shriek of fury echoed from my throat as my hands darted forwards, grabbing for anything. My face lashed forwards and I bit down viciously.

I felt my teeth catch into something leathery. I bit down harder and pulled back. Black liquids squirted and something screeched in pain.

The cloud dissipated and a satanic creature stood before me. It had the legs of something along the lines of a goat, but the upper body of a human, though the flesh was leathery and red. Two horns protruded from its forehead, giving it a truly demonic look.

I spit the glob of flesh out, sputtering my lips to try and get rid of the awful taste of satanic blood. “You fight dirty!” it screeched, but I merely shrugged. A second presence stood beside me. Derreck scrunched his nose as his face twisted to an angered frown.

“I’m gonna eat your guts,” both Derreck and I said at the same time. We both stood at equal heights, but his body mass was larger than both the demon and I combined. We charged at the beast, but its body dissipated into the darkness.

Something whipped across my back, making me yelp in pain. Derreck roared in fury. “YOU’RE DEAD, YOU COWARDLY FUCK!” he roared so loudly that the house might have collapsed had he yelled any louder.

Derreck grabbed a set of 50lb dumbbells then hurled them across the room as if they were simple baseballs. The figure appeared just behind Derreck, but I moved like a streak of lightning.

“FUCKING WHORE!” I yelled at the top of my vocal capacity, delivering a mid-flight punch to the demon’s skull. It stumbled back and both Derreck and I pummeled it to the ground.

The beast again disappeared into the looming darkness. “WHERE THE FUCK’D YOU GO, COWARDLY BITCH?!” Derreck scowled angrily, heaving up the bench press bar before he hurled it like a javelin.

The bar slammed into the beast’s chest, impaling it and pinning its body into the flimsy wooden dresser across the room. The demon squirmed before again dissipating into the dark. “Don’t be afraid of the dark, be afraid of what’s in the dark!” Hissed a voice that seemed to echo from all directions.

“BE… AFRAID… OF ME!” Derreck roared, arms cocked at his sides and fists clenched. He picked up a weight plate then threw it like a frisbee. The plate sliced through the beast before stabbing into the wall.

Both Derreck and I pounced onto it. “Let’s crush it under the squat press!” Derreck ordered. We kicked its body across the floor, near the large squat press machine. Both grabbing an edge on one side, we tipped the heavyweight machinery onto the creature. It yelped in pain but, once again, vanished into the dark, gloomy air.

Spotting it nearby, I rushed it, roaring all the while. “I’LL FUCKING GUT YOU!” I screamed, pummeling it into the wall. The creature shrieked and slashed its claws across my face.

I staggered back, but before it could get a second strike, Derreck plowed into it with a straight punch. We began to chase down the creature, roaring profanity at it until finally it seemed to dissipate for good.

“Time… to come home!” It shrieked. My face seemed to curl in pained anger.

“COME AND GET ME YOU FUCKING BITCH! FUCKING COWARDLY LITTLE FUCKING WHORE… FUCKING…” I trailed off in a fuming fury. “BITCH!” I yelled a random assortment of swears as I charged it.

The beast seemed to stand idly as both Derreck and I pinned it to the wall. I hammered a punch with my right while Derreck slammed with his left fist. The beast’s face shattered apart. Everything started to bleed red. My world pounded as the sides of my vision fogged.

We continued to hammer punches into the beast and everything seemed to get brighter. A faint voice began to echo in my head as everything disappeared into the blinding light. Suddenly everything was a bright white light.

I stopped, completely still as everything started to formulate in my vision. I was standing in front of what used to be my mirror. I stepped back in shock, body unclasping. A sharp pain seared through my right hand and I noticed a shard of glass stuck in my right knuckles.

“OW! SHIT!” I winced in pain as I began hopping around. I pulled the shard from my knuckles and my left hand immediately rushed and began applying pressure to the wound. Twilight rushed up to me, sputtering things that I could barely understand. I gulped as I realized what had happened.

This hadn’t happened since… a long time ago, and I was kind of unsure as to what it was. It couldn’t be just sleep walking, no way in hell. But I had no real explanation other than…

I looked to Twilight, and with a very casual expression, told her the first thing to came to mind. “Bad dream…”

Author's Note

Sorry it took me... about a month to get this chapter out. I know excuses aren't a great thing, but it's kinda funny if you like a bit of dark humor.
So I tried to gently close an industrial door so it wouldn't slam so hard, but my hand got caught in the door and it slammed my right hand pretty hard. Then my right index finger got a bit infected so I had to cut open the top of my finger and squeeze out all the juices, which were chunky and nasty.
Then immediately after that got better, I got some kinda flu sickness and was pale white yet still going to work... and my truck's busted, broke the sterring column and there's a hole in the rear fuel tank... poor Cadence.
Anyway, for those of you still reading, thank you for putting up with my sorry ass, have a good Valentine's day... or Hearts and Hooves day, whatever you wanna call it.

Chapter 20

‘I kinda like ice-cream…’

Friday, May 1st, 2012,

Twilight’s perspective...

I awoke rather groggily. There was a heavy presence on my lap that took my immediate attention. Evan lay across my legs, dozing heavily.

I had cradled Evan to sleep last night. Whatever had happened… it was creepy. What he had accomplished, in his anger, was just absurd without the assistance of magic. To somehow stab a weight plate of that size into the wall…

I hadn’t pried into the subject since he seemed equally as baffled by the incident as I was. My right hoof streamed through his flat top retro styled hair. A smile crossed my lips as he stirred slightly but continued dozing.

Lassie slept nearby on her own bed, her slight snores becoming more and more distinct as my body fully awoke from the drowse that had now worn off. Evan grumbled in his sleep, rolled over, and nestled his head into my stomach.

I gasped slightly as his arms wrapped around my waist. He continued to doze peacefully as I began to once again stroke my hoof through his hair. Thoughts streamlined through my mind as I recalled his weird mommy issue.

For whatever goddess forsaken reason, he considered me his mother. Though at the same instance he comprehended the fact that I was not his birth mother yet still thought it weird for me to show more than motherly affection towards him.

He got a little choked up as he started having difficulty breathing. A sudden dampness spread across my belly as he began to drool. “ECH! GROSS!” I whispered rather loudly. His head dug further into my fur and I gasped as his cheeks brushed across my breasts.

I immediately went to push his head away but my body cringed as he nestled against my set of tiny breasts. My hindlegs quivered as drool continued to seep from his mouth.

Though he wasn’t actually sucking on my teats, his lip passed over my nipples several times. A deep burning inside my groin began to fluster my urges. Though I wasn’t in heat, I began to moisten… down there.

Evan’s head stopped moving for the most part, but I gently, and very cautiously, slid his head back towards my pair of teats. His head now nestled into my breasts, I flinched in pleasure as I felt his mouth pass over one of my nipples. My right hindleg jerked a little as his soft, wet lips pressed against the nipple.

I held his head against that spot. Though he wasn’t intentionally sucking, it felt as if he was. His lips covered most of my breast, and every time he breathed, it sucked a little on my teat.

I bit down on my lower lip as I let out a sheepish moan. His drool etched down and quickly reached my nethers. My back arched forwards and his face rolled completely onto my breasts. The lack of oxygen made him gag and snort a few times, sucking back hard for air and in a result, sucking equally as hard on my teat.

I let out a long and pleasured moan as he somehow managed to continue sleeping heavily. I pulled his arms tighter around my waist before sneaking my right hoof down to the underside of my hindleg.

I slowly started stroking back and forth along the length of my thigh, driving my urges wild as Evan unconsciously suckled my nipples. My hoof finally lowered to my folds and I started to play with the little lump near the top of my crevice.

“Mmm…” I moaned out and I heard a yip from across the room. I peeked over to see Lassie’s ears perked up high, her front end low as if ready to play. “No Lassie, go back to bed!” I hushed and she whined in a rather annoyed tone as she paced circles in her bed then finally flopped down.

Stroking up and down my crevice, I began to pull my folds apart, revealing my wet hole. My left hoof snuck over Evan’s dozing body, between my legs and directly to my needy snatch. I began to let out louder moans, becoming careless about Evan’s unconscious state.

“Oooh… Twilight… you naughty filly,” I whispered. Evan snorted back hard, having a shortage of oxygen. As he snorted back, his mouth tried to also pull back air, sucking rather aggressively on my nipple.

My back arched forwards as I let out another loud moan. Gasping in pleasure, my hoof began to move at a faster, jerkier pace. “Oh… oh Celestia YES!” I cried out in pleasure as I started to reach my peak.

Evan stirred suddenly and I gasped. I had woken him. I immediately lept up in shock, flinging his body off my lap and onto the floor with a THUD.

“OUCH!” He groaned, rubbing his forehead attentively with his left hand while he sat up. I hadn’t noticed, but since last night, some of his wounds had healed. A few of the nastier bruises and cuts were left but, for the most part, his body was looking very healthy.

“Ohhhh… man, what?...” he trailed off as he looked to me, his tongue moving around inside his mouth. “Morning Twi… what’s…” he trailed off as he probably remembered why I was here.

“Evan… I jus… I… I…” I stammered, trying to make a cover for what I had done.

“It was a really bad dream. I’m sorry for wrecking the mirror.” I backed up in shock.

‘Mirror?’ I thought to myself. “But Evan… I just…” I trailed off, wondering if perhaps he didn’t know what just happened.

“ECH…” Evan spat as he reached into his mouth with his right hand. Soon after, he pulled a long straggly hair from the back of his throat. “UGH!” he groaned again, this time pulling a hair out from under his tongue. “I guess I need to shave or something,” he muttered before standing up, brushing his hand across his sideburns.

I blushed heavily. If he had looked closer, he would’ve noticed that was purple hair. He began to walk away and I called out to him. “Where are you going?” I asked and he again pulled out another strand of hair.

“To brush my teeth,” he replied before leaving. Lassie rushed after him and I heard him chuckle something about: ‘You want some cereal too?’

I sighed to myself. ‘How could I have let myself get so carried away? Twilight, what you did was wrong! You didn’t even get his consent!’ I mentally scolded myself. Though mentally I scolded myself, my body basked in the feel of sexual pleasure.

My climax still on hold, I had the explicit thought to follow Evan upstairs and seduce him. I quickly pushed the thoughts from my head. That was so wrong. I hadn’t actually even had him fall in love with me yet. I didn’t even know if what we had was really love or just a deep crush.

I let out a sigh and looked upstairs. I felt so bad about what I had just done… but it felt so good at the same time. With a deep exhale, I began to pace up the stairs, but a whiff of… something, caught my attention and I rushed up to the main floor.

The smell lingered through the air and I rushed to find out what it was. Skidding into the kitchen, I spotted Evan cooking something in the toaster. “Brushing your teeth?” I asked inquiringly and he raised his eyebrow.

“Yeah… about twenty minutes ago. You were sitting down there in some sort of brain lock for like… the last half an hour,” he chuckled just before a pair of waffles sprang from the toaster with a PING!

He pulled up a plate and stacked them onto it before loading two more into the toaster. He turned to me and spoke before I could comprehend what he had told me just seconds before. “Waffles?” he asked and I stuttered out a ‘Huh?’

Rolling his eyes, he repeated the question and I simply nodded before sitting down. After another few minutes, he flopped down and rose Lassie up onto the table. “Ah! No pets at the table!” I told him and he furrowed one of his eyebrows.

“Lassie isn’t a pet. She’s a family member. Isn’t that right Lassie?” he asked in a bubbly, fake offended voice. I kept my forelegs crossed as I gave him a glare. “Fine,” he retorted before setting Lassie down. “See that Lassie? She doesn’t love you like I do.”

He grabbed a plate, poured some syrup, and then sliced the waffles. Sliding it forwards, I naturally assumed he had done that for me. I took the plate in my magical aura but Evan gasped then yanked it away.
“HEY!” he laughed then looked to Lassie, whom sat on the floor, wagging her tail attentively. “You see that Lassie?” he asked in a bubbly voice, as if speaking to a toddler. “She’s even trying to steal your food.” He slowly set the plate down on the floor and I gasped.

“Well… I didn’t think it was for her… are you seriously feeding the dog waffles?!” I gasped but he merely rolled his eyes.

“She’s not 'The dog'. She’s my baby Lassie,” he replied but I just groaned, burying my face into my hooves. Evan was so… weird. Suddenly a plate pushed up against my foreleg elbows.

There were several sliced waffles with syrup. “This one’s for you,” he said with a wink. I rolled my eyes as I levitated over a fork. The waffles did smell nice, I would admit that. Taking a slice of waffle, I dipped it into some of the all-natural syrup then placed it into my mouth.

I nodded with a slight smile. They were good waffles. Evan chuckled slightly. “What’s so funny?” I asked curiously but he merely continued to chuckle to himself.

“Back in my world, when I was… oh jeeze… in grade eleven I think… maybe grade twelve. Anyway, a rumor started among the football team that I’d kick down a maple tree and squeeze the sap from the tree with my bare hands, then drink it raw with my waffles for breakfast.”

My eyes went wide. “Really?” I asked in shock but he simply laughed heartily.

“Yes and no. Yes, there was a rumor going round that I did that. No, I didn’t kick down maple trees and squeeze the sap from it with my bare hands and drink it raw… I boiled it on the engine block of my truck,” he said with a wink, but I was lost in my confusion. He laughed briefly before settling down. “I didn’t actually do what the rumor said. That’s why it’s just a rumor.”

I nodded then continued into my waffles. A sudden hit of curiosity struck me as I realized that Spike was missing. “Where’s Spike?” I asked, but my student just shrugged.

“Dunno. He left a note saying that he went out with Sweetie Belle. Must’ve left before we woke up,” he stated. I continued into my waffles, but another bit of curiosity hit me. Speaking of grade school, I wondered just how intelligent he was. He didn’t seem to catch on to most any advances I made…

“Evan?” I began and he looked up from his plate of waffles.

“Jah?” he replied through a mouthful.

“How smart were you in school?” I asked wonderingly.

He shrugged while looking to one side. “Ah dunno. Smart enough I guess. I did pass high school just before I got zapped here,” he informed me, but that wasn’t a good enough answer for me.

“I mean… on a scale, top to bottom, where would you rank?” I asked, but again he shrugged vicariously.

“How would I rank myself or how would others rank me?” he asked, but now I was a little confused. How would he know how others rank him among intelligence?

“Both,” I replied and he scratched the back of his head.

“Well… streetwise… I’m pretty smart. I’m not a complete wiz with vehicles or electricity, but I know guns pretty well. Books… I read but don’t like to write… so overall I’d say somewhere close to the middle,” he informed me before taking a deep breath. “Other people… ponies,” he let out a deep exhale. “For some reason the teachers at my high school saw me fit to give awards and shit. Hell, I even got two awards for having the highest grade in two different classes…” he trailed off and looked to me curiously. “Twilight… tell me something?” he asked and I nodded.

“What?” I asked back.

“Auto-mechanics I can understand, but… how does a gun toting redneck get the highest grade in mathematics?” he asked but I simply stifled a laugh. He must’ve been messing with me again.

“What’s the punch line?” I asked, but he shook his head.

“No, seriously. I slept through just about every math class and ended up with something like a 94% grade average,” he informed me but I still wasn’t giving into his joke.

“But?...” I asked, trailing off and waiting for the punch line. He simply blinked and I shook my head. “No offence, Evan, but… seriously? There’s no way!” I exclaimed but he rolled his eyes.

“Why in Celestia’s name would I admit to being very smart?” he asked and I went to reply, then realized that I was talking to him. Evan: a man who prides himself in doing rather unintelligent things.

“So… you really got two awards?” I asked but he shook his head. “I KNEW IT! You almost had me-“ But he cut me short.

“I got like five. One for academic grades in grade nine, eleven and twelve… which I got a medal for each. Then they gave me a medal and an award for being an English scholar or something. Then they gave me the two awards for having highest grade average in both auto-mechanics and math class… so I guess that’s six.”

My eyes widened. He had to be kidding. “Seriously?” I inquired, but he again just rolled his eyes in a huff.

“Again, why would I admit to being intelligent? Maybe I would admit to being smart towards vehicles but… math?” he asked then added in, in a ridiculous voice, “five pthus five equal eleventy!” He began to slap his hand against his chest as if mentally handicapped.

“Wow Evan. I had no idea you were an academic mind-“ But he quickly cut me short of my appraisal.

“Please, Twilight… don’t poke at my pride. I’m not exactly sure that I want ponies knowing I’m some smart ass,” he told me and my jaw dropped.

“BUT WHY?! You could achieve so much if you applied your mind to science, or even perhaps nature!” I gasped but he just shook his head.

“As… uhm… delightful as that sounds… I’d rather be doing something physically productive,” he replied as he stuffed the last of his waffles into his mouth.

I couldn’t believe this! Evan… my student, who struck me as a delinquent… was actually smart on an academic level. “Evan, you don’t realize how-“ I began but he was quick to stop me.

“Twilight… please, don’t patronize me.” He brought his plate over to the sink and began to wash it. I thought about it then smiled.

“Evan… I may not have been there but… Really, that’s incredible what you’ve accomplished. I'm so proud of you.” I saw his back stiffen and heard him stifle what sounded like a sniffle. ‘Did I say something wrong?’ I thought silently.

“Just uhh… leave your plate there… I’ll clean up,” he grunted. I could hear him trying to stifle… a laugh maybe? Was he still playing me? I looked down to my plate to see my half eaten waffles.

“But I’m not done...” I stated rather shockingly. Why would he offer to clean if I wasn’t done?

“Uhm… oh…” He was having trouble holding something back and quickly left the kitchen without even a second glance. I thought I spotted… tears?

* * *

Years ago, Evan’s perspective…

My Uncle Justin screamed in my face for… really no reason at all. “You can do better than that! And yet, all you do is sit on your fuckin’ ass all day like a retard!” He got rather close and I pointed to my report card.

“I got an eighty four! That’s really good!” I squeaked but he simply turned his nose up at it. My mom scoffed.

“He’s right,” she chimed in, “you do just sit on your ass and do a whole lot of fuck-all. Rather than taking walks with Ally, you should be studying!” she pitched on.

“What? That’s really good though, better than most people in my class!” I countered, but my mom and uncle simply scoffed. My uncle was the first to speak.

“Yeah, you might be better than the retards, but you’re still not the best. You should be THE BEST!” my uncle yelled.

My mother again chimed in. “Yeah, and their writing probably doesn’t look like chicken scratch. You should be spending a few hours a day practicing your cursive writing!” she told me rather sternly.

“Why? It’s useless. It won’t help me if I join the infantry,” I reversed her statement but she simply laughed.

“If the general saw your writing he’d probably revoke your submission!” She laughed and I tensed up. My uncle tossed my report card to the table.

“You should be studying every waking hour! Study, study, study!” he told me and I just shrugged it off.

“Why? I’m already good enough,” I told him but he just laughed and poked me in the chest.

“And that’s why you’ll never go anywhere in life. ‘Cause you’re just a fucking doy doy! Just DUHHHH! I’m so fucking stupid ‘cause I think I’m smart enough but I’m actually retarded… DUHHH!” His words hurt me deeply. Like he was one to talk. He had a dead end job and lived with his mom, my grandmother.

* * *

Years later…

I returned home from my graduation with both my new medals and my relatively new truck. I pulled the truck up to my parking spot on the lawn and hopped out. “AWW YEAH!” I yelled out and waved several awards in the air, several medals clanging around my neck.

My uncle and mom looked as I waved around the awards. “Got highest mark in both auto and math, plus the academic honour awards for grades nine, eleven and twelve! On top of that I got an English scholar award,” I boasted excitedly.

My uncle just swirled around his beer and shrugged. “Meh, what about grade ten, why didn’t you get an award for that year?” was all he replied. My mom just cracked open a beer.

“HEY! In grade ten my teachers didn’t like me… I… did good. I did great. I got a 94% in math, that’s nearly perfect!” I informed them but they weren’t all that impressed. My step dad paced over and wrapped a hand around me.

“Hey son! That’s awesome! I’m so proud of you!” He pulled me into a hug but my mind had already turned into a shell. He was always proud of me, so I didn’t look for his approval… I had done good, but… not good enough... I just wanted to cry...

* * *

Present day, Twilight’s perspective…

I had given the rest of my waffles to Lassie while I went to check on Evan. I heard sniffling from downstairs as I trotted down into the basement. He sat on the edge of his bed, face buried into his hands as he wept… he was crying! He almost never cried. He was always so rigid and uptight.

“Evan?” I asked softly and he jolted up.

“Twi! I uhh… UGH!” he groaned, rubbing his eyes furiously. “I must’ve gotten some soap in my eyes or something!” he lied and I approached him rather quietly.

“Evan… did I say something… wrong?” I asked, wondering if it was I who had upset him.

“Ngh… no… I… guh… I… nothing…” he grunted, trying painfully to keep back his tears.

“Evan, it’s okay to cry,” I whispered to him but he turned away.

“No it’s not! Not for this. If a family member dies… yes… but this… I’m just a… a fuckup,” he stifled a sob then snorted.

“You are not a… mess-up,” I informed him, not wanting to repeat his profanity.

“I am… that’s why I didn’t get a medal for grade ten… it’s why I’m not good enough!” he grunted and I gasped.

“EVAN! You got awards for… lots of stuff. Highest grades, for two separate classes, academic awards… Evan, you are good enough. You're better than good enough!” But he didn’t seem to take it too well. He began to have more difficulty stifling his sobs.

I lifted my hoof to his chin then twisted his face so that we were eye to eye. “Evan, even if you’re not perfect, nopony is. The fact that you were that smart… it’s just amazing. I’m SO proud of you,” I said softly, but before I could react, he burst into tearful sobs and squeezed me tight.

My eyes went wide in shock, but I slowly adapted and returned the hug, his face now buried into my shoulder as he wept profusely. I felt his chest shuddering during breaths as he struggled to breathe through heavy sobs. I had no idea what was going on… but I was certain this was important to him.

“I… I…” he stuttered through heavy sobs. “I love you mommy!” he cried. I smiled rather sheepishly. No matter how long he had been calling me mom… it was still a tad bit creepy, regardless of the situation.

“I love you too, son.” I patted him on the back as my eyes closed shut. My hooves continued to rub up and down his back as his sobs very slowly started to settle. And when I say very slowly, I mean it took over two and a half hours for him to settle down.

Finally he released himself from the hug and leaned back. “Thank you,” he whispered so softly that I could barely hear him. His eyes were bloodshot and his face was still wet. That’s when I really noticed it.

Most all of his wounds had vanished without a trace, not even a scar. The only ones left now were the severe ones, and they now looked like simple bruises or scratches. “Evan?” I began curiously. “Can you lift up your shirt?” I asked but he raised an eyebrow.

“Why?” he asked hesitantly.

“The injuries on your face… they’re all gone,” I informed him and his right eyebrow raised. I slowly brought my hooves to the bottom of his shirt and pulled it up and over his head.

Despite the shirt being a tad bit too small for him, I still managed to get it off. He sat idly, his muscles loose and relaxed. His body didn’t look uninjured… but all the bruises and cuts were gone. There were some spots where one could tell that he was hurt… but it didn’t make any sense.

I brought my right hoof up to his chest and rested it upon his mighty frame. I felt his heart beat with a healthy pace. His chest slowly inflated and deflated. His right hand rose up and gently covered my hoof, holding it down against his chest.

I looked into his eyes and time seemed to slow to an absolute. We just sat there, looking into each other’s eyes as time passed freely. I didn’t have a lot of experience with love or even relationships, so I didn’t quite know where to go from here.

I had one side of my brain telling me to lean forwards and kiss him, while the other side told me that it would strike Evan as strange because he still considered me his mother.

After another few minutes he released my hoof and slipped his shirt back on. “Well Twi… I was wondering…” he trailed off and my heart fluttered.

‘Was this it? Was this were he asks me if I’m interested in him?’ I thought excitedly.

“Do you still want to read those stories?” he asked. The question nearly threw me off balance and I gasped.

“WHA?! Huh… oh! Mackenzie Bolack!” I gasped and he nodded. “Sure, come on. I’d love to read it actually.” I wasn’t lying… but, at the same time, I wasn’t as enthusiastic as I made myself out to be.

He followed me upstairs and into the living room, which also double acted as the library archive. He pulled up a seat on the couch and flopped down. “So… how do we do this? I’ve never really read with somepony else,” he asked and I quickly answered his question.

“Well, I was thinking that I’d read one chapter then you could read the next. Aloud, so that the other can hear it and keep track of what’s happening in the story,” I informed him. He nodded and offered me the story.

I grasped the book in my magical aura and opened it to the first page. The first page, however, was a little different than most stories, and offered a glimpse of an action scene part way through the story to get the reader hooked.

I skipped it and proceeded to the prologue. “The desert air was steamy hot…” I began…

Minutes later…

I finished the chapter and offered Evan the story. He took the story, gently opened the pages wide, then began to read.
“ ‘Mackenzie,’ Granola informed Mackenzie over the two-way radio headset, ‘the insurgents have a hoofhold on that factory…” Evan’s voice was almost memorizing. I snuck my head up under his left arm and rested my head on his right forearm.

It didn’t bother him in the least as he continued on with the story. “The big mare moved through the shadows of the desert facility with almost ninja-like proficiency,” Evan continued. I started to care less about the story and more about snuggling into his body.

I could still hear his voice reading the story, but I didn’t care much. I nestled my head into his chest and sighed contently. Before I knew it, he stopped reading and offered me the story. “Your turn,” he informed me.

I smiled brightly. “No, please… continue. You have a wonderful voice.” He raised one eyebrow.

“Really?” he asked curiously and I nodded. I wasn’t sure if it was his voice, or just the embrace… it didn’t matter. “Okay…” he trailed off then quickly resumed the story. “‘Gral,’ Mackenzie called Granola via headset…”

Drowsiness started to overtake me as he continued reading. My eyes slowly succumbed to the drowsiness and I subsequently passed out while Evan continued reading.

My mind, though unconscious, still managed to recover things he was saying. Never once did he notice, or perhaps care, that I was asleep. Things had a hazy blur as I napped in his embrace...

Suddenly, I felt a hand nudging me awake. “Huh?” I asked drowsily.

“Hey Twi… it’s late and Lassie wants to eat out.” I rubbed my eyes and looked to the pooch who wagged her tail to and fro. Her wagging was so powerful that it moved her entire body.

Looking to the larger clock in the library, I realized that it was actually rather late, 7:32pm to be exact. I let out a yawn while at the same time stretching out my body. My tongue clucked around inside my mouth before my stomach promptly rumbled.

Looking to Evan, I nodded. “I’d like that Evan,” I told him and he nodded. I slid off his lap and allowed him to stand and stretch out before he mingled down to his room, probably to change. Looking to Lassie, I wondered just what exactly was going through her mind.

“So Lassie… do you think Evan and I will ever fall in love with each other?” I asked in a rather hushed tone. The dog simply tilted her head to one side in a wondering look. “Love… as in, intimately?” I asked before making the gesture to kiss an imaginary pony.

The Rough Collie made a whiny noise that sounded a tad bit confused, then, with her right paw, pointed towards the downstairs door. “Yes, him. Do you think he’ll ever fall in love with me? Intimately?” I asked, completely ignoring the fact that I was talking to a dog.

But, despite everything, I was shocked when the dog fell to its side, barking in what I suppose was laughter. I frowned. ‘I can’t believe I was asking a dog for romance advice,’ I thought silently with a stale glare directed to the dog who laughed at me.

Lassie suddenly stood up and began to make motions with her paws. First she pointed towards the basement door. “The basement door?” I asked, but she shook her head and pointed again, a little more strenuously.

“The basement?” I asked but Lassie rolled her eyes then made the gesture as if to flex her front legs. “Muscles… oh, Evan!” I announced and she nodded with wide eyes, in a very sarcastic way, slapping herself in the forehead with a ‘DUH!’ look.

“Well sorry, I don’t speak dog,” I countered and she nodded happily. “What? Don’t speak dog?” I asked, confused as to what she meant. She pointed again to the door. “Evan?” I asked and she nodded, and then shook her head.

“Wait… Evan, no?” I asked, now confused again, but she shook her head then huffed. “Well sorry, I don’t speak the same language as you,” I commented and she nodded happily before pointing to the door.

“Evan… doesn’t speak dog either?” I asked and she dragged her paws down her face in despair, whining all the while before racing off into the kitchen. She soon returned with a bouquet of roses.

She pointed at the roses. “Roses?” I asked but she looked to the ceiling and huffed, probably believing me to be the stupidest pony alive… and I probably was getting there, talking to a dog about roses.

She began making the gestures as if to give the roses to someone then kiss them. “Uhm… romantic?” I asked and she nodded then pointed to the door. “Romantic… Evan?” I asked and she nodded before shaking her head. “Romantic, Evan… no?” I asked but she shook her head and scratched behind her ears in thought. She pointed to the roses, then to the door, then made the motion with her paws as if words were coming out, and finally shook her head. “Romantic, Evan, words… no?” I asked and Lassie slowly nodded her head.

I scratched the back of my head… “THAT’S IT!” I exclaimed, before a voice chimed in.

“What’s it?” the voice asked.

“Evan doesn’t speak romance!” I announced proudly, having understood what Lassie meant, but not taking into consideration who the voice belonged to.

“Uhm… yeah… I tend not to go all mushy,” Evan muttered and I gulped.

'Eep!…’ I thought silently as I turned around. Evan was in a clean white T-shirt with dark blue jeans. He had some sort of… thing that had something else held to his leg… Ugh… it was one of those gun things.

“Evan… please tell me you’re not bringing your gun with you,” I pleaded and he nodded. “Evan… could you, just this once, maybe… not bring a gun?” I asked hopefully, but his face seemed to suddenly fade.

“What?! Twilight… but guns… I… what if something happened?” he asked and my face became rather stale.

“Evan… it’s Ponyville. Nothing dangerous is bound to attack tonight,” I stated in a rather dull tone that matched my unimpressed facial expression. Every time we went out he brought one of those death machines with him… and it was kind of scary.

“Well… just in case?” he asked, but I shook my head before trotting up to him.

“Please Evan? Just this once?” I pleaded. Before he had a chance to respond, I quickly remembered his… thing, his mental thing. I hopped up onto my hindlegs and gave a pouty face as I brought him into a gentle hug. “For mommy?” I asked and I heard him sigh.

“Fine,” he sighed and I could feel his body weight shift as he unstrapped the big cannon off his leg. It was one I hadn’t seen before. It was a shiny colour, almost like chrome, or perhaps stainless steel. It was smaller than his other ones, enough so that he could probably hold it in just one hand, but it still looked rather heavy.

I hopped down from the hug and onto all fours before we started to depart. Just as we reached the door, he grabbed his trench coat and whistled. Lassie zipped to his side and I rolled my eyes, this could only end one of two ways…

We both paced out into the streets of Ponyville. It was nice tonight, warm despite the sun having already set. Street lamps illuminated the streets as we paced along. Evan’s trench coat flapped about freely as Lassie yipped and barked occasionally. The young pup would constantly run circles around his feet.

“So where to?” Evan asked, snapping me out of my thoughts. Strange, usually we just trotted around Ponyville until he found an expensive restaurant… and then had us tossed out because he would try and sneak Lassie inside.

I thought to myself. Since we were still technically ousted from Franchini’s and Tony’s, there were only a select few places to eat out in Ponyville. I was about to offer to go to Sugarcube Corner, but Evan suddenly stopped, his nose high in the air as he sniffed loudly several times.

“Smell that?” he asked and I lifted my nose to try to depict what he was smelling, only to smell fresh air.

“Fresh air?” I asked, but he shook his head. Lassie lifted her nose and I heard the young pup sniff. Just moments later, her ears perked up and she barked happily.

“Exactly!” Evan exclaimed. I was confused, was he originally talking to me or Lassie. And why was it that he smelt something that I couldn’t?

He and Lassie started sniffing the air erratically, following whatever scent it was they had found. Rolling my eyes, I followed the duo. As we continued on, I suddenly caught whiff of something… pleasant. I sniffed again but couldn’t make it out. It smelt a little like…

“AWW YEAH!” Evan gasped excitedly. “I smell... garlic bread!” he announced.

‘How in Equestria could he tell already?! I only just recently caught wind of the smell and he already knows what it is?!’ I thought as he began to pace faster and faster. I quickly followed until we arrived on the south side of Ponyville.

There was a little food vendor wagon, with a stallion cooking a barbecue. A sign on the side of the wagon posted the prices of his goods. Nearby were three picnic tables, each with a tablecloth and a set of candles.

“Twilight?” Evan asked and I looked to him. “Good enough for a princess?” he asked and I rolled my eyes. I didn’t much care for the whole: Ponies bowing down to me, ordeal.

“I suppose…” I trailed off. Evan, Lassie, and I all walked up to the vendor, and the stallion turned to greet us.

“Twilight?” Evan asked, queuing me to order. I looked down the list. Though not expensive, it would cost less just to buy the ingredients from a grocery store then make it ourselves.

“Ohh… just a hay sandwich and a salad please… OH! And a lemonade to drink,” I ordered, in a somewhat embarrassed tone. I felt strange, going out to dinner with Evan like this. He didn’t consider it dating on any level, just eating dinner. On top of that, he always insisted on paying… though where he gets all his money is beyond me.

I know he works for Applejack and that she pays him fairly… but what he usually buys is just obscene. I was snapped out of my thoughts as Evan handed the stallion several dozen bits, no doubt he had bought an absurd amount of food again.

That was yet another thing I couldn’t understand about him. He seemed to have some sort of… advanced metabolism… with the amount of food he ate… he should be obese. An image of Evan with a large gut portrayed itself in my mind and I snickered.

“What’s so funny?” Evan asked, leading both Lassie and I over to a table.

“Oh nothing. Just wondering how you don’t get… overweight, with all that you eat.” I chose my words carefully, not wanting to be offensive.

“Keeping fit, pumping iron, exercising… you know, the basics.” He sounded as if it was easy to attain a physical stature of his size. I sat across from him at the candle lit table. The tablecloth was rather nice, and could probably suit even Rarity’s standards.

The wind was calm and the only noise was that of Evan as he groaned, leaning back and stretching out. “Nice night huh? UHMMMMMMGHM!” Evan let out a long and relaxed sigh as he finally settled down, his stomach growling fiercely.

“It’s beautiful,” I replied. The candle’s flame flickered, casting light to one side of Evan’s face but shadowing the other side. He still had some minor bruises, but they were quickly fading, almost fast enough to be noticeable to the naked eye.

“So?” Evan asked and I tilted my head in wonder.

“Sooo…?” I trailed off, not knowing what he had meant.

“What’s new and exciting?” he asked and I shrugged.

“I dunno… nothing lately. I mean, other than the average librarian life.” I thought to myself of what to possibly talk about. Most things from this world he considered, pardon my language, ‘gay’.

I decided to switch the topic. “How about you? You always seem to have something interesting going on.” He merely shrugged.

“Well… uhm… heh-heh,” he chuckled briefly before scratching his chin. “Other than saving a shy and timid pegasus from certain death after attempting to save her stupid pet bunny… and subsequently ending up in the hospital every time… not much… suppose I should try and stay away from her if I want to live past twenty, eh?” He laughed as if his life expectancy was a joke.

“Evan… why don’t you take life seriously?” I asked, wondering as to why exactly he had the outlook on life that he did.

“The same reason that you take life seriously I suppose,” he replied but I shook my head.

“I take life seriously because it’s a gift. Every moment of one’s life is special. From gaining your cutie mark, to growing up, to being an adult… and falling in love with your special somepony,” I stated, hoping to perhaps bring up love in this topic.

Instead, he simply added to my statement in a rather foolish tone. “And live happily ever after in the land of magical ponies.” He clasped his hands together, made his eyes go wide, and put on a bubbly smile.

I knew he was screwing around, much like he always did. He let out a sigh before getting serious. “You see Twi… even back on my world, I was a bit of a risk taker. I liked the action. There were some things I didn’t do, but I liked the twirly feeling of… whatever it is that makes you feel alive,” he said, sounding as if nearly dying was some sort of thrill ride.

“So you’d rather risk your life to the extreme and die young rather than live happily ever after with somepony you love?” I asked and he sighed.

“That’s another thing. I never really… fell in love. That way, if I died across seas in some godforsaken oil war, then I didn’t have a widower and fatherless child. Makes sense, no?” he asked and I simply facehoofed.

“But what about your immediate family?” I asked, but he simply twiddled his thumbs in thought, looking down to the table.

“Well…” he trailed off before picking up again. “Don’t worry. I don’t think there’s any oil wars here. Besides, I don’t know if I’d want to join Equestria’s military… they probably just have pillow fights or throw daisies at each other,” he stated and I groaned. He had completely dodged the topic and made fun of Equestria’s elite royal guard at the same time.

“Evan, please, for once take me seriously. Do you really enjoy risking your life for a simple thrill?” I asked and he half nodded.

“I don’t exactly go out looking to try and nearly kill myself. I usually just end up in a situation where it happens, and I love every moment of it. Usually makes for a good story too,” he replied.

“But don’t you care about the feelings of those who love you?” I asked and he let out a somewhat annoyed sigh.

“Twilight… I love Spike, Lassie, and you very much, but… I mean… do you really want to live pent up in a bubble your whole life. I mean, when you die, do you want to think to yourself ‘Hey, I didn’t do anything in life but I lived to a hundred! Hurray!’ Or would you rather think ‘I only lived to twenty, but I felt like I did a thousand years’ worth of stuff,” he told me and I was at a loss of words. Alicorns didn’t die of natural old age, so I couldn’t really say.

He made a good point but… his outlook on life was so… grim. “Evan?” I was nearly pleading. “For me, could you maybe not take so many risks? I don’t want to lose you,” I said and he placed his hands together, let out a long sigh, and thought deeply.

Perhaps, in retrospect, what I was asking of him would be like him asking me to stop being intelligent. “Okay…” he sighed. “For you. Because I love you… I’ll stop taking so many chances… but I’ll still rush to the aid of my friends, no matter what,” he informed me.

My heart rested easy. I couldn’t be positive that he’d come home every time he left, but now I could rest a bit easier knowing that he wasn’t out looking for trouble. “I love you too Evan,” I replied and set my hooves across the table.

He slowly placed his over mine and we just sat there, looking into each other’s eyes… if only he didn’t consider me his mother. I let out a content sigh, but my thoughts were suddenly interrupted as the vendor stallion placed our food across the table.

I received my salad and sandwich while Evan, like I had predicted, got a ridiculous amount of food. I watched with loving eyes while Evan began to feast, sharing his food with Lassie.

I chewed my sandwich with content. At least, like Evan had stated before, he was a loving son that cared for my feelings. Though he may not understand my love for him in full, I could live with that for now.

I remembered how earlier he had informed me about how he used to be rather intelligent. So much so that he had been awarded several medals and honours in high school. Perhaps he and I weren’t so different after all.

Even though I may be an alicorn and he may be a human from another world. Even though he may take a different outlook on life than I do… it turns out we were both smart, though he may not willingly admit it. On top of that, we both care for others and will rush to their aid if needed.

I wondered to myself how I ever thought he could’ve been unintellectual… a sudden chuckling and the sound of a dog’s whining broke my thoughts. Evan held some garlic bread in his mouth while Lassie chewed on the other end.

It looked as if the duo were playing tug of war, Evan obviously letting his pet win. I rolled my eyes… ‘That’, was why I thought he was dumb. The things he did never ceased to astound me.

The two began to root through a dish of lasagna and, despite Lassie trampling through it with her dirty paws, Evan would eat from the dish, even in the spots Lassie had stepped in.

Eventually we all finished, minus the mess of sauce and crumbs on the table. Evan leaned back, licking his lips contently. “Well Mom… that was good. Thank you,” he thanked me but I was stunned by the gesture.

“For what? I should be thanking you. You brought me out, and you paid for it,” I told him but his answer shocked me.

“No, I meant thank you. For coming with me. It’s not often I get to spend time with my mom,” he replied, but I just rolled my eyes.

“Evan… didn’t you ever go out with your mother before? I don’t mean me, I mean… your real mom?” I asked but quickly realized that I had struck a deep nerve. His face went gloomy and he simply swallowed while looking down at the table.

“Well… I… we… that is to say… yes! We did go to McDonald’s, lots… a couple dozen times…” he said, trailing off, his face twitched a bit. “We went a few times when I was young… through the drive through… once or twice” He kept trying so hard, but I quickly cut off the topic.

“Forget about it,” I quickly interrupted him, grabbing his right hand and pulling it forwards, placing it under my hoof. “Evan, I had a wonderful time tonight, and I’m absolutely thrilled that we went out together.” I thought to myself about what I could possibly add. “And I’d really like to do this again soon,” I smiled, a hint of a blush coming across my cheeks.

His face brightened, a smile creeping across his lips. I didn’t know much about his original mother, but it was obviously something he didn’t think of much… or didn’t like to talk about.

The vendor stepped up to the table and offered us both a menu for dessert. For a simple vendor, he was pretty high class. Evan spoke first. “I’ll have a… uhm…” He looked to Lassie, who pawed at the menu.

I smiled and rolled my eyes. ‘Only Evan would buy ice-cream for his dog before himself,’ I thought with a quiet laugh. “Yeah that one… and a uhm… a cinnamon funnel cake. And for my wonderful mother…” he trailed off, leaving me on queue.

I searched through the menu. It wasn’t really easy. Every item had a picture with it that looked so divine… One spiked my interest though, not because of the name but because of the ‘50’s retro look.

“The uhm… lover’s milkshake,” I stated with a nervous tone. The milkshake on the picture had two straws, with a glass that coned downwards with glass plating to stabilize the cup. On top of the beverage was whip cream, sprinkled with grated chocolate and a red cherry on top.

The vendor nodded then trotted off. Evan spoke, “Yeah, that looked pretty good, but I kinda liked the funnel cake more,” he stated and my heart fluttered a little.

“You could share with me, if you wanted,” I offered and, through my peripheral vision, spotted Lassie giving a facehoof… or I suppose a facepaw.

Evan shrugged. “Nah, it’s okay. If I wanted one I’d probably have just ordered one. Thanks though,” he replied and Lassie made the silent gesture as if to say ‘See! I told you so!’

Moments later the vendor returned with our dessert. Evan handed Lassie a waffle cone that was topped with ice-cream. The ice-cream itself had been coated with chocolate dip.

“Chocolate’s not good for dog’s you know,” I informed Evan but he must’ve discarded my warning because he simply set Lassie up on the table then placed her large ice-cream cone on a somewhat clean plate.

Lassie placed her front left paw on the cone’s bottom to hold it down then took a big bite out of the ice-cream swirl. She pulled her head back and shook it rapidly. Evan laughed. “Yeah, they call it ‘ice’ cream for a reason.”

I watched as Lassie took a more cautious approach, licking the ice-cream rather than chomping on it. Evan dug into his large funnel cake. It looked as if the vendor had simply poured swirls of pancake batter into a deep fryer then, when it was finished frying, slapped a scoop of soft ice-cream on the top with sprinkles of cinnamon. However, despite the simplicity of it, Evan looked to be enjoying himself.

I brought my lips up to one of the two straws and began to suck up the beverage. The cup was rather large and the straw was rather small, so I didn’t manage to drink much before stopping to lick my lips.

It was pretty good, I’ll say that much. Before I even realized it, both Lassie and Evan had finished. Evan wasn’t paying attention and was simply looking to the night sky with a content gaze. Lassie looked to me and motioned her front paws towards Evan.

‘What?’ I mouthed silently and she slapped her paw on the tops side of her snout, covering her eyes at what she believed to be my stupidity. She took her paw away, pointed to Evan, made the motion as if to drink from a straw, then pointed to me.

I leaned over and whispered to her. “Ask Evan to have a drink with me?” I asked. She rolled her eyes, put on a forced smile then nodded. “Oh… okay,” I replied. I still couldn’t believe, of all my friends and all the ponies I knew who could possibly help me with Evan… I was taking romance advice from his dog.

“Evan,” I spoke up, catching his attention. He turned and looked to me. “I uhm… I can’t finish this alone. Do you… maybe you’d like to have some?” I asked, piecing together my offer as I went.

“Uhm… well… I guess.” He scratched the back of his head, probably not sure about it. I caught glimpse of Lassie making the motion for me to go ahead. I gently slid the milkshake cup to the middle of the table.

“I’ll just wait till you’re done, then finish it off,” Evan replied and I quickly thought up an excuse of why not to.

“Well… it’s okay. There’s two straws,” I stated. He rubbed his chin then simply shrugged. Tilting one straw towards him with my magic, I leaned my own head forwards and gripped the straw with my lips.

Sucking small amounts of the beverage as Evan did the same, I looked to him as my heart fluttered wildly. We made eye contact for a brief moment, but he quickly looked away, eyes darting from side to side. For a second, I swear I could’ve seen a blush cross his cheeks, but it might’ve just been my eyes playing tricks on me.

I continued to watch him with a loving stare until finally a snorkeling sound began to be present. We sucked up what was left of the beverage and Evan leaned back, a small smile on his face. I wondered just what was going through his mind but didn’t bother to ask.

In the cup was still the chocolate topped whipped cream and cherry. Lassie grabbed a spoon, licked it clean then made a motion towards Evan. She pointed to him and then made the motion as if to eat from the cup, before finally pointing to me.

I gulped. Was she really wanting me to ask Evan to spoon feed me?! Lassie gave an irritated face then forced the spoon towards me. My mouth was agape. I had no idea how to approach this.

I bit my lip then decided to deviate a little. I took a spoonful of whipped cream then called for Evan’s attention. He turned to me and I wavered the spoon to and fro. “Want some?” I asked and he nodded then reached for the spoon.

“It’s okay, I got it,” I replied, taking hold of the spoon with my magic then hovering it towards his mouth. He chuckled briefly.

“Oh… okay.” He let out a childish laugh then leaned forwards and ate the cream off the spoon. He chuckled as I brought out another spoonful. Looking away for a moment with a stifled laugh, he soon turned back and accepted the offer, a deep hue of red flushed across his cheeks.

As he went to eat the cream and some dabbed on his nose. I caught glimpse of Lassie making another notion for me. She licked her tongue in the air, pointed to her nose and quickly pointed to Evan.

I didn’t really need to be told again. “Here, let me,” I offered, leaning across the table and slowly licking the cream off his nose. He giggled, closing his eyes and laughing harder.

“Okay missy, my turn.” He took the spoon from me, scooped out some cream, then offered it to me. I didn’t waste any time in leaning forwards and slurping up the cream. My heart was beating erratically, I was so nervous yet… so calm.

We giggled together as he spoon fed me, until finally he reached the last spoonful which contained the cherry. I laughed and extended my tongue. He wiped the whip cream off on my tongue, then slowly placed the red cherry on top of the cream.

I slowly retracted my tongue, chewed the delicious cherry and finally swallowed. This moment… was perfect… well, almost perfect. In the background, Lassie was giving a very sarcastic clap of her paws.

I placed my hooves over Evan’s hands. I had the courage to tell him how I felt… but I knew, deep down, that he’d probably still consider it weird. Rather, I just left my hooves over his hands and we sat there, basking in the candlelight and looking into each other’s eyes while the night continued on.

Lassie… well, Lassie scampered off after a squirrel and chased it up a tree…

* * *

Hours later, Evan’s perspective…

We finally arrived home at about midnight. Though the whole milkshake thing was kinda weird… somewhere deep inside it made me feel fluffy and good. I guess this was what moms were supposed to do with their kids. This is how kids are supposed to feel while they’re young… with loving mothers.

My heart continued to flutter, though I wasn’t sure why. My mind just wanted me to be around my mother a lot more now. Just being near her made me feel at ease. It was a new feeling… but I was willing to embrace it.

* * *

Manehatten, third person perspective...

The air was calm, and the night was dark. The light pollution from the large city restricted view of the moon and stars. A lone mechanic worked late hours in his small shop, fixing a tiny motor meant to run a generator.

A medium sized bipedal figure stepped into the gloomy street, dressed in a white tank top and black cargo pants. "Excuse me? Excuse me?" The figure called, catching the mechanic's attention. He looked to the side and spotted the figure. Setting down his wrench, the greasy mechanic stood up to all fours, using his magic to wipe his face with a dirty rag.

The mechanic nodded. "What can I help yah with?" He asked, a little agitated that somepony was up at this hour. But then again, it could be a paying customer.

The bipedal walked towards him with a casual pace. "Well, I'm sorry to bother you at this hour... but I really need some help." The voice was feminine but not quite ladylike.

The mechanic rolled his eyes, still scrubbing his face clean. "Well... maybe." He wiped the back of his neck with the greasy rag.

"Well... I was wondering if you could help me with a little... thing, that I've been wondering about?" She asked and the mechanic sighed.

"Sure, what can I do to help?" He asked.

The woman put on a frown as she made it look as if she was thinking strenuously. "Well... you see... it's just that..." She trailed off and removed a Beretta 92FS from a holster. Snapping it up in one fluid motion, she squeezed the trigger. A small 9mm Parabellum round slammed through the mechanic's skull, killing him instantly.

The report of the pistol's shot echoed through the town's streets as the mechanic's body clumped to the ground in a heap. Not a single scream echoed... not even a frantic voice. The woman waited, before stepping above the mechanic and firing three more shots into his chest.

Each gunshot had a loud snapping echo that pierced the otherwise quiet night. The woman waited, mentally counting to herself as she waited for the sound of perhaps police sirens. Instead she was greeted by silence. Leveling the pistol sights on the dead body, she capped off the remainder of the magazine's capacity.

Each shot sliced through the dead body, jerking it wildly as empty brass casings littered the ground. The muzzle flash soared out of the pistol and illuminated the dim street.

Still waiting for some sort of response... even just a 'Oh my god!' would have sufficed... instead, still a relative silence. Only the city ambient greeted her. Horns of sorts, ponies' casual voices...

"Hello?!" The woman called out. "I've just shot some... somepony!" She yelled, yet still nothing. "I SAID!... I'VE JUST SHOT SOMEPONY... AND I DID IT ON PURPOSE!" She yelled out. One of the windows on a tall apartment building opened up and a stallion yelled down.

"HEY LADY, SHUT UP!" The stallion from far above yelled down. Ejecting the magazine and loading a fresh one, the woman smiled slyly...

Chapter 21

‘Man’s best friend...’

Evan’s perspective,

Sunday, May 3rd, 2014...

I nearly burst out from under my blanket, heart pounding in my chest. I gasped rather loudly, sweat beading down my face and bare back. My chest continued to inflate and deflate at a rather quick pace. My vision darted around the dimly lit room, searching for… something.

My breathing started to rapidly decline as I realized nothing was happening. All my memories from the dream vanished and I couldn’t recall what had happened, but whatever it was… it must’ve been bad.

I laid flat onto my bed before releasing a long exhale. Lassie pounced up onto the side of my bed, her body weight weighing down my mattress on her side. I looked to her with a slight smirk. “You’re getting fat,” I joked.

She gave a frowny face before whining in retort. I simply rolled my eyes then rolled over. Within seconds I felt her paws tapping against my exposed side. Her paws began to push into my skin, each paw pushing at a different time.

I let out a groan and rolled onto my back. “What?” I murmured. She stepped up onto my gut and began pushing into my gut while panting heavily. I hadn’t noticed, but she had been growing lately. Rather than just a small pup, she was about adolescent size for a Rough Collie.

“You saying I’m fat?” I asked sleepily and she barked happily before hopping in circles on my stomach. “Mmm…” I groaned then rolled onto my side again. Instead of leaving me to be a fatty, she began to bark loudly while pawing at my sides again.

“Ugh… dog…” I moaned but still she persisted. As I rolled back over onto my back, she lept onto my chest and began to prance around. I groaned irritably as her nails began to dig into my chest.

“What do you want?” I asked. She lept off my body, onto the floor, and rushed over to her small domain. As quickly as she left, she returned with a bright green tennis ball in her mouth.

Her front legs perched on my bed side while her hindlegs supported her from the ground. She plopped the tennis ball onto my bed then began to pant heavily. “Oh… fetch?” I asked in a mumbling tone. She yipped and I simply grabbed the ball then tossed it to the other side of the room.

She watched in a rather joyless way as the ball bounced away but never actually moved from her position on the side of my bed. Soon after the ball stopped bouncing, she looked back to me and barked. “The point of fetch is that you retrieve the ball.”

She grabbed my blanket with her teeth then pulled it off my body. “AGH!” I gasped as a rather cool chill surrounded my body. Living in the basement wasn’t exactly the greatest plan if one wanted to stay warm.

Lassie quickly pulled my blanket across the floor, leaving it in the middle of the room, before retrieving her ball and coming back to my bed side. “I have a better idea, dog,” I began in an irritated voice. “How ‘bout you retrieve my blanket instead?” I asked, but she didn’t reply.

I pointed to my blanket, which still resided in the middle of the room. “My blanket, the one you took off.” Instead, she dropped the ball at my side, rushed over to the wall, hopped up onto some of the weight equipment, and finally pawed at the closed window.

While whimpering, she managed to slide open the window with her paws. A warm draft entered my room, sending shivers up my back as my body adjusted to the new temperature. Standing up, I paced over and looked out the window.

It was just reaching sunrise and looked to be a wonderful day. “What? You wanna go outside?” I asked and she barked excitedly. I let out a deep sigh before turning and pacing over to my heaping pile of clothes.

I would have to wash them soon…

A thought came to my mind. ‘I think there’s a laundromat in town… if I took my clothes before going with Lassie, then went back in an hour, put them into the dryer… they’d be done by the time Lassie gets bored.’

I nodded as I came up with my fool proof plan. In retrospect, I hadn’t played with Lassie lately, so I suppose some friendly play time with her wasn’t out of the question. Thinking back to yesterday, I suppose I could’ve played with her then too. I hadn’t done anything other than laze around the entire day.

Slipping on a semi-fresh white T-shirt, blue jeans, and grey socks, I grabbed my steel toed Terra work boots and nodded to Lassie. “One thing first,” I told her and she gave me a pouty face.

“Oh don’t act like that, all I need to do is stop at the laundry place in town and wash some clothes,” I informed her and she quickly yipped then grabbed her tennis ball. I quickly retrieved a large black garbage bag and stuffed it with my clothes before pitching it over my shoulder and making my way upstairs, Lassie in quick pursuit. She pranced with an almost regal trot, her tennis ball residing inside her mouth.

As I reached the entrance to the library, a young voice called my name. “Uhh, hey Evan. Whatcha doin’?” I turned to see who it was, only to find my small dragon friend.

“Hey Spike. Not much, going out with Lassie,” I replied. He twittled his thumbs in nervous thought.

“Uhm… can I come with you?” he asked and I merely shrugged.

“Knock yourself out,” I said and he smiled brightly before pacing to my side as we left. Goddess only knows why he was up at this time, but I wasn’t going to bother to ask him.

We left and moseyed through Ponyville until finally we stumbled across the laundromat. I let myself inside, making my way to the back washing machines before dumping all my laundry into one load.

Coining the machine with just a single bit, the machine started its cycle. As I turned to leave, a friendly face caught my attention. “Hey Ms. Cheerilee,” I called out to the dark pink mare, who turned and waved back.

“Well hello Evan! It’s been quite some time since I last saw you. How have you been?” she asked in an upbeat tone.

“Oh you know, the usual,” I replied as Spike, Lassie, and I made our way towards the exit. “You?” I asked.

“Oh, same old same old…” she trailed off and let a smirk cross her face. “Tell me, I haven’t seen you much anymore. I thought perhaps you’d end up being a regular at the school,” she replied but I just rolled my eyes.

“I was never much one for schooling. I might pop by every so often but uhh… meh. I did my time, you know?” I asked but she tilted her head in confusion. “Uh… ha-ha… I went to school for a long time back on my world, and I wasn’t really planning on spending all that much time in school afterwards,” I told her with a small snicker.

“Oh… well, I was really hoping to have you in again. I was planning on perhaps a class picnic, but I’d need somepony big and strong to help out. I was thinking… maybe you could help?” she asked with a flutter of her eyes.

I put on a very forced smile and nodded. “Of course… I’d, uhh… love to,” I replied in a very fluent lie.

“Oh wonderful. I’ll give you a ring when I have a better idea of when I’m going to do it. I’m sure the children will love it!” she announced happily. She lept to her hindlegs and planted a kiss on my cheek before settling back down to all fours. “Thank you Evan, you don’t know how much this means to me.”

I gave her a nod, along with a fake smile as I left. “I can only imagine. See yah around Cherry,” I gave my goodbye and left. As we reached a further distance, I groaned and set my right hand over my face.

“Oh my god… class picnics are so fucking retarded…” I groaned, forgetting I had a youngling with me.

“Why?” Spike asked and I let out a silent gasp.

“Oh… sorry, pardon my language… I forgot you were here,” I apologized for my rough swearing then snickered. “Class picnics are just so… childish and… just… ugh!” I then realized that Cheerilee’s class was comprised of all colts and fillies. “Well, then again… I guess they might enjoy it."

An image of the class, Cheerilee, and I in an open meadow with several picnic blankets and baskets… and rainbows and butterflies… and sunshine, entered my mind. I shuddered. “Oh my god… I can’t believe I agreed to this,” I muttered and Spike looked to me curiously.

“So… if you didn’t want to do it… why’d you agree to?” he asked and I just shrugged.

“I have difficulty saying no to good friends.” I let out a humored laugh.

“Oh… uhm… you don’t think… that what I do is stupid… do you?” he asked feverishly but I merely waved my hand.

“Nooo,” I assured the young dragon truthfully. “There’s a difference between being a kid and…” I trailed off and shuddered as even more goofy images entered my mind. “Being stupid,” I added to the end.

“Well… what’s so dumb about a class picnic?” Spike asked and I let out a sigh.

“I guess it’s just still hard for me to grasp the idea of it. See, I came from a school where they locked the kindergarten kids in a gigantic cage during recess, while the rest of the children were separated by grade, then forced to play either in the forest, or in a field.” I snickered before bursting into laughter as I remembered hearing about how one of the kindergarten children was tossed into ‘The Calming Room’.

“Oh my god…” I laughed loudly. Both Spike and Lassie stopped. “I remember when I was in… was I in grade one?” I thought to myself then nodded. “Yeah, I must’ve been… anyway, when I was in grade one, I remember this creepy door in my public school. It had no markings, and a tinted window that you couldn’t see into. I asked the teacher what it was for and then she was like, ‘That’s where we throw the bad children until they behave.’ But I thought she was just joking around,” I informed Spike. He tilted his head in curiosity as I continued my story.

“Then about… oh, maybe two years ago I guess… maybe three. Anyway, it turns out that, since teachers aren’t allowed to…like…” I began to make hand motions as I tried explaining it. “Since they can’t like… physically detain a student in any way deemed ‘physically harmful’, when a kid started to act up, they’d just toss them in this room and lock them in there,” I informed him. “The room was like… a four foot by four foot room..." I started to have difficulty talking as laughter chattered my voice. "With padded walls and floor. So they’d toss you into this room and lock you in... then they’d like… turn off the lights and leave you in there... until you calmed down.” I laughed loudly as it became too much to bear.

Spike had a look of petrified shock on his face. “That’s awful,” Spike gasped but I snickered.

“Oh… Oooh… oh that’s not the best part. So this one kid… he’s like four years old. He started to get angry about something so they just tossed him in this room, locked him in, and left him there and he pissed himself. In the end his mother found out, got into an uproar, then it turned into a social media issue.” Tears came to my eyes as I was laughing so hard.

“That’s awful,” Spike commented but I merely shrugged.

“Yeah… but you see, that was normal for me back on my world. Children getting locked in dungeon rooms, kindergarteners locked in giant cages during recess, all that good stuff. So now, I’m here… in a world where children… foals… colts and fillies… they have class picnics… rainbows and sunshine… for me it’s just goofy.” I looked to him and gave him a half assed smile.

“Oh man… that’s crazy. How did the schools get away with that?” he asked and I just shrugged.

“Dunno, never finished reading the article. I was laughing to hard. I think there was something about the school board appraising the use of the dungeon rooms,” I informed him and he gulped in fear.

“Oh man… I’m glad I don’t live in your old world,” he commented and I just shrugged. Suddenly, as we were walking along, Lassie stopped me by pulling on my pant leg. We all stopped and Lassie began to bark and yip.

“What’s up pooch?” I asked. She lifted her nose into the air and sniffed. Both Spike and I immediately caught wind of a wonderful smelling aroma. “Ohhh…” My stomach began to rumble, along with Spike’s.

My tongue began to lace around the insides of my mouth as I could nearly taste the fresh pastries on my tongue. Almost as if I was mesmerized, I began to follow the wonderful smell.

At first I thought perhaps it was coming from Sugarcube Corner, but soon we found ourselves near a small set up stage. “Trixie?” I gasped, rushing forwards and into the small, shanty home.

As I entered, Trixie gasped in shock, then quickly settled as she realized whom it was. “Oh… why hello. THE GREAT AND POWERFUL… Ahem… sorry. Trixie greats you with open hooves,” she stated, and then returned to the small stove she had running.

“Woah… Trixie… since when were you good at cooking?” I asked and she shot me a look, one with a raised eyebrow as if I had just challenged her greatness.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie is good at many things!” she boomed in her boastful voice, before switching to a more subtle one. “Cooking being one of them,” she informed me rather casually before levitating over a tray of freshly baked cookies. “Care to try them?” she asked and I nodded.

Letting Spike take a few, I took a couple myself before offering Lassie a handful, the last of which made Trixie gasp. “Are you really going to feed that dog cookies?!” she gasped and I nodded.

Trixie just rolled her eyes then removed a tray of muffins from the oven before turning it off. In retrospect, it was good I was here. I had promised to watch out for her after all… but in hindsight, perhaps she was watching out for me, feeding me cookies and what not.

“So Trixie,” I began and she turned to me with wonder. “I’ve been meaning to get around and ask… how have you been?” I asked and she just shrugged with a smile.

“Getting along fine. Not many things in this town to do, but Trixie digresses… the ponies here are very nice despite everything she’s done,” she replied and I smiled. Her third person persona was kind of funny.

I took a seat with Spike while Lassie sat with Trixie, the duo quickly becoming acquainted… mostly by Lassie giving Trixie puppy dog eyes and conning the magician into feeding her more banana-nut muffins.

We sat and conversed for a while longer before I realized that perhaps my laundry was finished. “Well Trixie, I hate to be a bother, but I have to go finish my laundry.” With that I went to leave, but she stopped me.

“Oh wait… do you mind if Trixie tags along? She needs to do some laundry of her own,” she asked. I didn’t see why not and nodded. Now a group of four, Trixie carried her laundry, which didn’t look at all dirty, with a levitation spell and followed us to the laundromat.

We arrived and, much to my prior assumptions, my laundry was finished. I began tossing my wet laundry into a dryer while Trixie began tossing hers into a washing machine.

“Shoot,” Trixie muttered. “Burdy, do you have a bit Trixie can borrow? She forgot her change at home,” she asked. I turned to give her some change and nearly gasped in shock. She looked so much different. She had taken off all her clothes… not that many ponies wore clothing in Ponyville, but…

Her hair was down and looked finely groomed. Her fur seemed to gleam while her tail trailed along with a sharp, gleaming straightness. She looked beautiful… GAH… I shouldn’t think of her that way, especially after what she had been through… but she was pretty like this.

“Uh… uhm… yeah, uh… here,” I stammered, offering her several bits. She smiled and graciously took the coins, swiveling and coining the machine. In the brief moment that she swiveled around, her tail fluffed, offering a fine view of her slightly arched rump.

I gulped and quickly spun around, embarrassed that I had just looked at her in that way… what was happening to me? I would’ve never looked down there on a mare when I first arrived, but now…

I scratched my head feverishly. I set my own laundry to dry then thumbed the machine to run. Biting my lower lip, I forced away the image that still burned itself into my mind. Lassie tugged at my leg, pawing a tennis ball to my feet before sitting, panting excitedly.

“Alright Lassie, let’s go…” I trailed off and looked to Trixie. “Wanna tag along?” I asked the mare. Perhaps it would be nice to hang out with the boastful magician… or whatever she considered herself now.

Trixie looked to me with a somewhat shocked face. “You’re asking… The Great and Powerful Trixie if she’d like to… hang out with you?” she asked and I nodded. “I’d like that,” she replied, not using a third person persona. With that the four of us left, now following Lassie who yipped, barked, and pranced around the streets until finally leading us to a small meadow.

Lassie turned to me, front end low as she growled playfully. “Alright Lassie… go far,” I told her then gave the tennis ball a heave. The green ball soared through the air and Lassie quickly chased it down as it bounced through the tall grass. Lassie's sharp sense of smell somehow managed to lead her through the grass and to her prize.

Trixie trotted about before pacing several circles around a spot in heavy grass to finally plop down. She seemed content while watching Lassie and I play fetch. Lassie returned with the ball, drool covering most of it. I grabbed the ball and tossed it a second time, a bit further this time. The ball landed in some heavy grass far off in the distance, maybe fifty… sixty yards.

Spike stood idly by and I felt a sudden surge of sadness for the dragon. I had nothing for him or Trixie to really do. I had originally meant it to be just Lassie and me. I thought to myself then snapped my fingers as a thought came to mind.

“Hey Spike… you ever fly a kite?” I asked. He looked to me and I smiled. “Hey Trixie, you wanna build a kite?” I asked. I saw Trixie’s head poke up from the grass.

With a thought that I haven’t actually heard about before, I took off my shirt, seeing as how we didn’t have a kite. Lassie quickly returned with the tennis ball, but I didn’t throw it.

“Lassie, can you get me two or three really sturdy sticks?” I asked and she yipped then scurried off into the distance. I looked to Trixie and Spike. “You guys have flown kites before, right?” I asked. Spike nodded, but Trixie shook her head.

“What?” I gasped, shocked that she had never once flown a kite.

“I never really… took interest in it. It seemed rather silly and foalish.” I was baffled. Even as a kid I had flown a kite… though only a few times one summer, because I got the kite stuck in a tree and never got another one ever again.

The returning childhood memories of mine drove me to new happiness. I really wanted to go flying a kite right now, no matter how childish it seemed. Lassie quickly returned with about five rigid sticks in her mouth.

Placing my shirt on the ground, Spike, Trixie and I quickly went about constructing a kite. In mere seconds, I realized we’d need string of some sort. “Lassie, we need string,” I told my canine companion.

To my astonishment, Lassie left in a fume of dust, then returned only minutes after, with a roll of string in her mouth. Stringing together the stick structure inside my shirt, we constructed a cheap kite, and then attached the roll of string to the bottom of the kite.

“Well… if it doesn’t work… I’ll just have to buy one.” I grabbed a nearby stick and placed it through the hole in the roll of string. Handing it to Trixie, I licked my finger and felt for the wind direction.

“Okay, the wind’s blowing this way, so you have to try and get the broad of the kite to catch the wind,” I informed her, but she shook her head.

“I have a better idea,” she informed me, her horn already glowing. I was about to state that levitating the kite with her magic defeated the purpose of it, but she surprised me as she changed the weather around us. 'Woah... now that is great and powerful...' I thought silently.

The wind picked up and was a little more gusty. Picking the shirt kite up in her mouth, Trixie gave it a toss and the shirt was caught in the draft. It was quickly pulled into the air and Trixie took hold of the string spool and to let the kite fly higher into the sky.

I watched the kite float around in the air, a smile creeping across my lips. I felt… weird… almost like I was a kid again.

I didn’t keep track of time, but a fair amount must’ve past while I watched the kite fly about freely. Spike spoke up, “Can I try? That looks cool.” I looked over to Trixie and Spike.

Trixie, a smile on her face, gave control of the kite to Spike. Spike laughed as he took control of the kite during the small windstorm. From time to time, the strength of the wind against the kite would pull the small dragon forwards. “Aww man… this is so cool,” Spike murmured to himself.

Trixie sat, her horn lighting up from time to time to change the direction of the wind. I looked to the tennis ball that sat idly by and picked it up. With a whistle, I called my puppy who was sitting with nothing to do.

“Yo Lassie… catch,” I called, flinging the ball across the meadow. Lassie’s ears perked up and she zoomed away after the ball, barking wildly in happiness. Time passed, Trixie and Spike played with the kite, Lassie and I screwed around with the tennis ball… and a stick she found in which we played tug-of-war with... and she dug a hole in the meadow to bury the stick afterwards because...

As the day reached noon, a fairly familiar voice caught our attention. “Hey Spike!” A bubbly voice called as Sweetie Belle quickly trotted over. She paced up to us, looking mostly to Spike.

“Spike, I was wondering if maybe you’d like to come with me to Sugarcube Corner. They have a special on right now, but it’s for two ponies and it’d be way too much for me to eat alone,” she asked.

Spike looked to her, then to the kite, then to me. “Knock yourself out kid. You only live once, right?” I told him. The duo went to rush off, but Trixie stopped them.

“Wait… Spike, take the kite with you. You two might have more fun with it than I will,” Trixie offered and Spike’s eyes went wide with excitement.

“Really?” he replied and she nodded in a sign of generosity. Spike accepted and the duo rushed off with the kite.

“You know Trixie,” I began, her looking to me. “I really think it’s great that you’re being nice to ponies and all but…” I trailed off then gave a shiver. “That was my shirt you just gave away.”

She went pale faced as she realized what she had so innocently done. “Oh… I’m sorry… well, perhaps your laundry is done. Besides, I need to go back and finish my own,” she stated.

Lassie quickly came to my side, the green tennis ball residing in the grip of her jaws, and our group started for the laundromat.

As we stepped in, Trixie immediately went for her wet laundry while I pulled mine out of the dryer and stacked it. Trixie again turned to me in need of change which I happily offered.

With that taken care of, the three of us left, leaving my stacked laundry on a nearby table inside. As we stepped outside, we spotted Sweetie Belle and Spike laughing through the streets with the shirt kite.

Trixie sighed. “Ahh… young love,” she chimed and I raised an eyebrow with a slight frown.

“Young love?” I asked. She simply nodded in reply.

“It’s a wonderful thing, isn’t it?” she asked, but I merely shrugged.

“Two things… I don’t think that’s young love, and secondly, I don’t know.” But she just shook her head.

“Oh no… that’s young love if I’ve ever seen it,” Trixie informed me, but I had to break her stride.

“Don’t think so. Spike loves Rarity,” I informed her but Trixie sighed, shaking her head in slight humor.

“But does he really love her? Or just think she’s pretty? There’s a difference. What they have is young love. Spike might not yet know it… but it’ll dawn upon him soon. Besides, didn’t you ever love when you were young?” she asked but I shook my head.

“No,” I replied bluntly and she stopped.

“Never?” she asked and I nodded.

“Not in the way you’re asking… I mean, I’ve thought a girl was pretty, but never loved any. Can’t let emotion get in the way of progress,” I informed her and she stopped in her tracks.

“Progress of what? What could be more important than loving somepony special?” she asked. Funny, I didn’t take her for a life counselor. I pondered the question for a moment.

“Progress of having fun,” I told her, but she tilted her head.

“That doesn’t even make any sense. You can easily have fun with somepony you love. Probably more fun,” she stated but I shook my head.

“Nah… well, not where I came from. Most of the girls were crazy and bitches… and the other ones were like me. ‘Screw relationships, single life is better and less stressful,’” I informed her and Trixie was now at a loss.

“That’s terrible. How could somepony think being alone in life would be better than being in love?” she asked but I just shrugged.

“Well see… from my perspective… I always had friends telling me to get a girlfriend, while at the same time they’d be in a relationship. Then about a month later, something would happen, they’d break up, and my buddy would be heartbroken, and I would say, ‘Don’t mean to be a dick, but that’s why I stay single,’” I informed her but Trixie didn’t agree.

“But if you don’t take a chance in love, how will you ever know if it’s right for you or not?” she asked but I replied easier than she could’ve guessed.

“But why take the risk when I can just… not love, and have a lot of fun?” I asked and she was baffled for words. “Anyway… A little Belle tells me there’s a special on in Sugarcube Corner for two. I’m hungry, wanna tag along?” I asked.

Trixie rolled her eyes then nodded. Lassie barked at me and I nodded, grinning down at the energetic little pup. “Yes Lassie, you can have some too.”

We arrived at Sugarcube Corner shortly after. Pinkie immediately spotted me and bounced over. “HIYAHEVANHOWAREYAHTODAY?!” she asked in her regular, bubbly voice.

“Uhm… hi Pinkie. I hear there’s some good food today. Figured I’d stop by,” I responded, not having a clue to what it was she said.

She looked to Trixie and waved erratically before bouncing back towards the front counter. The place was rather short on customers today, only having a few ponies here and there… and even two donkeys… weird.

Lassie, Trixie and I took a seat near one of the front windows, settling down and finally relaxing. Before I could say anything, Trixie brought up the subject I wish I had won. “I still can’t believe you’ve never loved.”

“Well, like I said, I’ve loved, just not like that,” I began as I picked up Lassie and dug my face into her plush fur. “Example… oooh! I love you SOOO much Lassie!” I giggled, rubbing my nose against her face. Lassie started licking my nose in reply.

She squeaked a bark that sounded kinda like a dog’s giggle… it sounded very strange. Trixie just rolled her eyes, finally dropping the subject. Pinkie bounced over and offered us all menus, even Lassie.

I quickly came to the assumption that I wanted some fries and water. Trixie got a hay sandwich and some sorta fruit drink… the picture had a fruity little umbrella and a lemon slice…

“Come to think of it, I want one of those too,” I ordered, having a sudden craving for the strange looking tropical drink. Lassie pawed at the menu, barking as she showed what she wanted, which was mostly just biscuits and treats.

“Okie dokey lokey!” Pinkie announced then bounced off. Before I could even speak… let alone before the laws of physics would even allow, Pinkie zipped back to our side with all our food.

My left brow lowered while my right raised high. My mouth was agape in shock of how exactly she managed to get our food that fast. One might think perhaps it was already ready, but the steam from the freshly baked goods was present, proving it was fresh.

“I… I… alright,” I shrugged, handing over what I owed her for the meal. Pinkie just… tucked the change into her mane.

“Hope you enjoy it,” she giggled then bounced off in her regular, bubbly way.

Trixie smiled and rested a hoof over my hand. “Thank you for taking me out. It’s not often I can honestly say I spent time with a true friend.” I sighed, placing my free hand over top of her hoof.

“Don’t worry about it. You’re pretty cool in my books,” I informed her. I heard some snuffing coming from Lassie. She was sorting through some muffins and what not. She stood on the table like the foolish young pup that she was… well, I guess she wasn’t a puppy anymore. Though not full size, she was partly way there.

Trixie giggled as several heads turned our way. I laughed as well, reaching over and rubbing up and down my canine friend’s back. “Awe… who’s a good girl?” I asked, Lassie answering by chewing up some muffins, making a terrible mess on the table.

Her paws were still dirty, leaving paw prints on the table, but the majority of the mess came from the muffin and cookie crumbs. I turned my attention back to Trixie and thought hard for a moment.

I didn’t want to bring up harsh memories of Tristan… but she seemed to know a little bit about love. Either that or she just wanted to pry into my past love life, which was extremely minuscule at the very most.

“So Trixie, how about you?” I asked and she turned her attention to me. “Have you ever… you know… loved?” I asked, hoping that Tristan wouldn’t be brought up. She looked to the side while her chin rested on her hoof.

“No,” she replied rather calmly and almost… sadly.

“Love interests?” I asked, somewhat curious if the mare had ever fallen in love with another.

“Once or twice but… they didn’t see me in the same way,” she replied rather modestly, just before taking a bite out of her hay sandwich. “How about you? Oh... wait, I guess I already asked,” she corrected herself then took a mouthful of her sandwich.

“Nah, not really. It was never my scene, yah know?” I stated and she only nodded.

“You’ll find somepony. They say there’s somepony out there for everypo… everyone,” she told me, quickly restating her last part in partial realization that I wasn’t a pony.

“Yeah well… goddessdammit!” I swore rather loudly, shocking Trixie. I pointed to Lassie, whom had eaten my fries. Trixie snickered and I turned to her with a stale glance. “How would you like it if Lassie ate your food?” I asked irritably, but Trixie didn’t reply, she just kept snickering.

I quickly ordered another batch of fries, of which Lassie got half. After about another half an hour, Trixie, Lassie and I packed up then headed out and back into the open meadow fields.

I flopped down and let out an exhausted sigh. Trixie brought up a random subject that I would’ve never thought of. “So… I don’t think you have a cutie mark… right?” she asked.

“That’s right,” I replied and she was quick to bring up another question.

“So… how do you know your special talent in life?” she asked me.

“I don’t.” I let out a yawn and stretched out in the grass.

“Do you ever wonder what your special talent is?” she asked and I rolled my eyes. If only she knew that ponies and humans weren’t all that closely alike.

“Not really. I’m good with the random assortment of things and… well, that’s just it. How about you?” I asked and she sat up, looking to me with a curious look.

“What about me? I know what my special talent is. I even have my cutie mark to prove it, see?” She twisted to one side, placing her rump in full view.

“That’s not what I meant… I shoulda asked if you like your special talent or…” I trailed off. There was a moment’s pause before Trixie replied.

“Well of course I love my special talent. I’m the Great and Powerful Trixie! Greatest magician to ever step hoof on Equestrian soil…” she trailed off while I just laid in the grass, my eyes closed as I basked in the sunlight. “Are you even listening?!” she asked, rather irritably.

I nodded. “Yep… just resting my eyes. You were saying?” I queued for her to continue.

“Well… like I said,” she continued, “I’m the greatest magician of all time.” She stopped and I just figured she was done, but then she continued with something I wasn’t expecting. “But sometimes… I just wish I didn’t have to be great and powerful… sometimes I just wish I could be normal. Like other ponies. Live in a townhome, have a family…” she trailed off with a wistful sigh.

I hadn’t noticed, but my body was extremely exhausted from… something. “Well that’s the dream, right?” I mumbled, not really thinking of a proper reply.

“What?! No it’s not. Everypony wants to be famous. To be somepony everypony else knows. To be on the frontline of newspapers… are you even listening?!” she asked again, getting irritated.

I felt a light jab hit my side as she poked at my dozing body. I nodded and let out a series of vocal mumbles that were for the most part just grumbles. She finally let out a sigh then curled up beside me. “You’re hopeless,” she laughed rather innocently.

Just before I passed out, I felt Lassie snuggle up underneath my left arm and nestle deep into my body’s warmth.

* * *

Years ago…

It was winter… and it was goddamn cold. I guess that’s why Americans always refer to it as ‘A Canadian winter’ when things get bellow negative thirty degrees Celsius. I stood in the kitchen, cooking up a batch of crispy bacon and scrambled eggs with cheese… and some toast… and cereal... and sliced oranges.

My mouth chewed on nothing as my stomach grumbled in anticipation. As I finally finished the bacon and eggs, I took out the spatula and scooped myself some of the heavenly food.

Taking two slices of toast from the toaster over, I slapped some cheesy scrambled eggs onto the toast, then three strips of bacon, making myself a breakfast sandwich.

I sat down, peering out the window and towards the snowy forest. As I sat eating my sandwich, I watched the snow gently fall from the sky. It was kind of pretty… and kind of reminded me of a goofy Disney flick.

A wooden cabin in the woods during a beautiful and gentle winter snowfall. I continued to watch until… I squinted my eyes as my mouth went wide in… a mix between shock and disbelief.

Ally, my best old hunting dog, was dragging something… bloody. She tugged aggressively on something of fair size, a trail of fresh blood following her. “What. The. Fuck,” I grunted.

Seeing as how she wasn’t in any sort of discomfort, I simply left her to drag the… corpse, into the yard. I watched as she pulled it into the yard and started gnawing on it. A figure staggered into the kitchen.

“Morning,” I greeted my mother. She was drowsy and was still very hung-over… actually, I think she was still drunk, judging by how she stood and her facial expression.

“Heh.” She gave a very drunken laugh, then made her way to the window. “Whatcha lookin’ at?” she asked, piecing together a drunken sentence.

“Ally killed something… I think,” I stated, not knowing what she killed, or for that matter, how she killed it.

“HA!” she laughed. “The lizard killed it.” I rolled my eyes. Yup, she was drunk. “You know… when she first came here, we used to call her lizard!” she announced, now making it obvious that she wasn't just drunk, she was heavily intoxicated.

“No… we never called her lizard,” I informed her, but she shook her head.

“You don’t remember because… when we first got her… and we first came here, you used to cook on a little stove and do your dishes in a tiny sink and you were the best little nig,” she finally lost it and couldn’t piece together her thoughts.

I just rolled my eyes. “Want some breakfast?” I asked, directing her attention to the freshly cooked breakfast.

She inspected the food then turned to me. “And now you’re cooking on a big stove, because-s-e you’r-re all grown up… and you’re… the Chinese eats dogs, so make sure they don’t get Lizard.”

I groaned, placing my right hand over my face in pity for her. I quickly finished up then placed my dishes in the sink before going downstairs. I slipped into the gun room and fished out the vintage double barrel shotgun from the gun cabinet, along with four shells of two and three quarter inch double aught buckshot.

I slipped two shells into the chambers of the side by side shotgun before clicking it shut.

This shotgun could’ve been a vintage show gun… had it been kept in good repair. It was first owned by my… great, great something-or-other grandfather Joseph when he first arrived from Mother Russia, just before the Russian civil war.

As the family tale goes, when he arrived, the first firearm he bought was this shotgun. As the tale goes on, he hunted everything from rabbit to moose. The right barrel was rifled and could chamber shotgun slugs. Despite the shotgun being ancient, the rifling was still present.

When I started using it, I was rather agitated with the fact it was never maintained. It took me hours to clean the powder fouling and lead deposits from the barrel. In the end, even though I didn’t legally own the gun, it had kind of become mine, passed down from generation to generation. Despite naming just about every gun I owned... I never named this one... it just wouldn't feel right I guess.

I slipped on some winter clothes and made my way outside. Ally was still chewing on… what looked like the chest cavity of a medium sized mammal. I got closer and saw that chunks of fur were still present on the hide and it looked like a… small deer.

“Ally… what the hell did you do?” I asked and she looked up to me. Seeing the shotgun in my hands, her tail went erratic and she hopped to all fours and started racing off into the deep snow, thinking that we were going hunting.

I pressed a finger to the chest cavity, and though it was cold, it was still a little mushy, meaning it hadn’t died all that long ago. I stood up and began to follow the blood trail, wondering how the hell she had managed to kill a deer.

Thoughts began to wander my mind. It was a little small to be an adult, and since it was winter now… it was probably just a fawn deer… poor thing. But even with the snow so deep, I was wondering just how the hell Ally had managed to kill a fawn deer all on her own.

I started making my way through the forest, following the blood trail, until I arrived at the small river that ran through the property. Entrails, fur, and blood were all smeared over a semi-large area.

I was shocked… there was no way Ally had done this. I stepped forwards and observed the trail. There was several… “Coyotes…” I mumbled in a deep voice. Bastards had been running rampant and unchecked lately.

I followed the markings and things literally played an animation in my mind as I looked at the tracks. Even though I was here… it was like things were rewinded, and I was watching some sort of vision from the past.

A young fawn deer rushed through the thick snow, its long legs having difficulty traversing through the snow. It struggled as it trudged along. Coyotes yipped and snarled as about... seven fogged into view.

The fawn screeched in petrified fear as the nimble coyotes simply glided across the snow. As the deer reached the bridge crossing, the coyotes struck, all of them latching to the deer, pulling it to the ground.

They began to aggressively assault the screeching fawn, pulling its stomach apart and gruesomely gutting the poor thing, eating it while it was still alive. A snarl turned my attention to the trail, along with the attention of the coyotes.

A lone canine stepped forwards and Ally growled viciously. The half dozen or so coyotes snarled and snipped while Ally stepped forwards cautiously. As she continued her approach, the coyotes charged forwards.

Ally lept onto the leading coyote and bit down hard on its neck while another went for her exposed back. Ally quickly kicked and scratched with her hindlegs. Letting go of the grip on the coyote’s neck, she switched her attention to another, barking aggressively and rather loudly as she nipped at the next coyote's neck.

Another coyote bit at her lower leg, but she kicked and pawed at its eyes with her untrimmed, sharp nails. Her pitbull muzzle bit down with brutal force around the coyote’s neck while she shook aggressively.

The coyote whimpered and tried to pull away. She obliged its need, but only to change her attack to another. She lept forwards, tackling a coyote to its back and biting its exposed neck.

For whatever reason, she didn’t kill it, rather simply bit hard then attacked another. Taking a few strides back, the coyotes stalked towards her. Ally began curled her lips, revealing her sharp teeth and the coyotes stepped back. With her prize won, she gripped the remains of the chest cavity and began pulling it away, leaving the coyotes to the remains…

So that’s what all that barking was about a while back… how she went toe-to-toe with coyotes and why they didn’t attack her as she pulled away their kill… maybe it was some kind of animal pride… or maybe I just wasn’t as good at tracking and I was reading the tracks wrong.

I gave Ally a pat on the back. “Good job pup… even if it was a stupid decision.” I placed the foregrip of the shotgun on my shoulder, barrel facing behind me, and began making my way back to my home.

* * *

Present day…

I awoke peacefully… well, kind of. Trixie was nudging me awake, but she was subtle about it. “Mmm…” I moaned as I awoke. My neck was being slightly strangled as the Christian cross around my neck had gotten tangled in some tall grass.

I pulled the necklace free from the grass and sat up, the cross dangling freely against my bare chest. “Evan… the children have a problem,” Trixie informed me.

I was about to ask ‘What children’ when I quickly spotted Spike and Sweetie Belle… without the shirt kite. “What’s up?” I asked and Spike chuckled nervously.

“I’m really sorry… it was an accident. I swear, the wind caught it and…” he stammered nervously. I scratched the back of my head in confusion. I was still drowsy, having just awoken, and couldn’t puzzle together what he was saying.

“So what’s wrong?” I asked.

“Well…” Sweetie Belle began and Spike finished.

“We kinda got the kite stuck,” he informed me. I blinked then rubbed the back of my head.

“Okay… so what’s the problem?”

Minutes later…

When they told me ‘We got the kite stuck in a tree.’ I thought it would’ve been a tiny tree, maybe twenty feet high… but they ‘REALLY’ got it stuck. It was in a humongous tree on the edge of the Everfree.

The kite itself was about… fifty… maybe sixty feet up. It was getting late and the sun was getting ready to set. Trixie’s horn flared and tugged on the kite, but it was snagged up really good and threatened to break if Trixie pulled too hard.

“So… what now?” Spike asked.

I let out a sigh and gulped. I didn’t mind climbing trees, but… that was really high and the kite was out pretty far onto the branch. “Well… nothing much,” I replied, and both Spike’s and Sweetie Belle’s faces fell.

A distant memory resurfaced. I remembered when I got my first, and only, kite stuck up high in a tree. But despite being only twenty feet up, no one would climb the tree for me to get the kite, and I’d never flown a kite since… well, until today.

A feeling surfaced in my stomach. I wouldn’t make Spike or Sweetie Belle climb the tree, and I wasn’t sure how well Trixie could climb. “I’ll climb up and get it… Trixie, can you catch me in your magic if I fall?” I asked and she nodded.

“Evan, we could always just-“ Trixie began but I cut her short.

“Nope! I won’t hear it. My kite flying was ruined as a kid, and I won’t let their experience be ruined because somepony wouldn’t get the kite for them… plus that’s my shirt,” I stated.

“BUT-“ Trixie began, but I was already climbing the tree. At first it was alright, but as I started getting to about… thirty feet, things started getting awry. It was as if the tree was swaying widly.

“Just don’t look down, just don’t look down…” I trailed off and finally reached the tree branch where the kite was stuck. Luckily the branch was thick, very thick, probably three feet in diameter.

I gripped the tree, almost like I was giving it a bear hug, and began shimmying across towards the kite. As I made my way across, my vision glanced down and things seemed impossibly high.

“GAH! WHY AM I UP HERE?!” I screamed, shivers running down my back. The branch seemed to sway aggressively in the wind, almost as if it was ready to snap. Inside I was screaming like a little girl.

Sure, I could fearlessly fight a pack of Timberwolves, fight some Manticore, or demons or… whatever… but this, like needles, was a big no-no in my books. “OOOH MAN… I DON’T LIKE THIS!” I screamed.

Finally reaching the kite, I slowly reached out, pulled it free, and then tossed it down. Trixie called out to me. “Okay, now just come down already!” she called out, almost as fearful as I was.

I went to go back, but I could barely manage. The wind blew and swayed the branch more. My body stiffened and refused to move. “FUCK THIS!” I screamed, not wanting to move as more shivers went down my back.

“EVAN! HURRY UP, PLEASE!” Trixie cried, but my body simply gripped harder against the tree branch. I looked back and it seemed as if the tree’s main body was impossibly far away.

I’d say call the fire department, but they probably didn’t like me very much after my last encounter with them. I tried to shimmy back further, but again ended up stiffening up again when the branch started to sway in the wind.

“EVAN!” Trixie called out, but I didn’t answer. “LET GO!” she called and my eyes went wide.

“WHAT?!” I yelled back.

“LET GO!” she screamed and I looked over the side to see her. From here, she looked like a tiny ant… or maybe that was just my imagination playing tricks on me.

“ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE?!” I cried, but she shook her head.

“NO, REALLY. JUMP, AND I'LL CATCH YOU IN MY MAGIC!” she offered.

“NO WAY, THAT’S INSANE!” I yelled back.

“Evan! Jump and I will catch you! Please... just trust me,” she yelled less frantically and in a more controlled voice. I looked over the side of the branch and whimpered.

“Oh my God… I can’t be seriously contemplating this,” I murmured to myself. “Promise?!” I yelled and she nodded.

“I promise, trust me!” she yelled back in a trustworthy voice.

I took several deep breaths and edged over the side. “Okay… I’m gonna jump… you better catch me… or else,” I warned, frightened right to the core of my soul. I tried shimmying over the edge, but ended up upside down and still gripping the tree branch.

“JUMP ALREADY!” Trixie yelled. I took in a deep breath then, with a bout of faith, let go. I ended up screaming like a little filly as I fell through the air. My eyes were clenched shut as I continued to scream until my lungs were exhausted.

Finally, after what seemed like ages, I cracked open my right eye. I found that I was being levitated just inches above the ground. Trixie smiled. “I told you that you could trust me,” she replied.

My heart was still pounding and I wasn’t really thinking. “Oh my God… I almost died,” I wheezed and Trixie rolled her eyes.

“You know that I could’ve just levitated you up, then you could’ve grabbed the kite,” she informed me and I nearly went into a fit of rage.

“WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY SOMETHING EARLIER!” I yelled and she shrugged.

“I tried to, but you were too stubborn and wouldn’t listen,” she replied and I thought about it. She had tried to tell me something, but I thought she was just going to say leave the kite.

Spike spoke up. “Wow, you were totally awesome up there,” he said, but I shook my head.

“Are you kidding me?! I was screaming like a little filly,” I replied, but he shook his head in return.

“So? I don’t know a single earth pony who would climb up there just to get a kite,” Spike chipped in and my heart rested easy. Lassie barked and caught my attention. In her mouth was a pencil and paper.

I looked to my friends and smiled. “Thanks. You guys are the best,” I told them and Trixie rolled her eyes.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie is not a ‘guy’, she is a mare,” she retorted, but I just rolled my eyes then grabbed the paper and pencil from Lassie and scribbled down a note about my lesson of friendship.

Dear Princess Purple Sparkles,
Today I was taughted a lesson of friendship. Sometimes, even if you’re intentions are the best, you end up too stubborn to listen to even a close friend. In the end, if you had’ve just listened to your friend, perhaps a great deal of trouble could’ve been avoided, but even so, they will always be there for you when you need it.

Chapter 22

‘Another human?!...’

Monday, May 4th, 2014…

I awoke to the feel of Spike nudging me awake. “Ugh… what?” I asked groggily, not having a lot of reason to awake at this hour… though I had no idea what time it was.

I rolled over to see Spike holding a letter for me. “Here, you got mail. It looks important,” he informed me. 'Damn! I missed Derpy... oh well.' I grabbed the letter. On the front, written in beg red letters, read URGENT.

‘Well gee… I wonder why he thought it was important,’ I thought rhetorically. I ripped open the letter, but the message was rather short.

‘Dear Burdy,
It’s the F brothers. We require your immediate assistance. Meet us at our desert garage.

Yours truly, don’t write that, he’ll think we’re gay!
Why the hell did you write that on the letter, now he’ll definitely think we’re gay!
GIVE ME THE DAMN PENCIL, IT’S MY LETTER!
OUR LETTER…’

The rest of the letter was ineligible and just a mess of scribbles, but I got the gist of the letter. They needed my help. I groaned, rolled over, and grabbed my watch. My eyes went relatively wide as I realized what time it was. Slipping on my engagement ring, watch, and Christian cross necklace, I let out a sigh. Well, if I get started, then at some point I’ll finish.

“Ugh… as if it’s 9:30,” I groaned. Standing up, I grabbed a pair of brown trousers, a white T-shirt, and my cowboy duster that Rarity had made. I would have liked to take my camouflage, but Rarity was repairing it at the moment.

I gave a wave to Spike. “Be good,” I told him with a wink as I grabbed my brown leather cowboy hat and stuffed it over my head. Lassie pawed at my legs and I knelt down.

“Sorry pooch, but you can’t come with me this time.” I gave a short smile then put on a serious face. “Ah’ll be back,” I told her in my thickest Arnie voice ever. Lassie whined in retort then pawed at me harder, telling me to be back soon.

I made my way out to my truck and immediately opened the passenger side door, retrieving Belladonna along with her custom leg holster. Stuffing a magazine into the pistol before holstering her, I closed the door then made my way to the driver side.

Trailing my finger along the metal panels of my truck, I whistled to myself. “Oh Cadence, how I love you so,” I told her, slowly embarking into the hulking vehicle. I gave her a tap with The naughty key right were she liked it.

Keying the ignition, I started the truck before making my way towards the desert garage. In only a matter of minutes, the trip started to become excruciatingly long. I flipped open the glove box and pulled out one of the custom CDs. Slipping it into the radio player, I began to jam to the tunes of ‘Sign of the Gypsy Queen, by April Wine’.

‘Lightning smokes on the hill rise,
Brought by the man with a warning light…’

I loved April Wine… well, most of the music anyway. The music easily made the trip do-able and, at the same time, allowed me to jam to some music. The lyrics continued as I started exiting Ponyville. I used my knees to steer the vehicle while jamming with an air-guitar.

‘Hurricane at the very least,
In the words of the Gypsy Queen…’

After only a few minutes, the song ended. “Oh no you don’t! That’s my cruisin’ music.” I thumbed the backwards seek button, rewinding the song to the beginning. As my truck threshed through the sand dunes, I cranked up the music. I contemplated rolling down the windows and start howling like a hooligan, but then realized that if I got sand inside the truck… I’d never get it out.

‘Get my saddle and tie it on,
Western wind who is fast and strong…’

Cadence went airborne as I struck a large dune that was shallow on the other side. The truck bumped along through the sand and a huge fume of dust followed me as I hit a straight away.

Leaving Cadence in 2WD, I gunned it to 120 km/h. I squealed in excitement as I dared a glance in my rear-view mirror. The dust cloud was incredible… no, it was insane.

The instrumental part of the song hit mark and I began to vocalize the wordless instrumental music, which didn’t sound at all like the tunes, but it was still awesome none the less. Oh man… if only I could’ve done this back home.

I spotted the garage coming up fast and smirked. As I approached, I started easing on the brakes until reaching about sixty clicks, then hammered on the brakes.

‘Shadows moving without a sound,
From the hold of the sleepless town,
Evil seems to be everywhere,
From the spirit that brought despair…’

The cloud of sandy dust blanketed the area, making it almost impossible to even see the end of my hood. I turned off the truck and stepped out just as the dust was passing. I heard Flim and Flam coughing violently as I slammed the door. I stood idly with a blunt look on my face. “I’m-back,” I told them in a deep Austrian accent.

As the dust cleared, Flim and Flam shook, sand shaking out of their fur in big tuffs. “Well… that was an interesting way of making an entrance,” Flim mentioned as he brushed the sand off his shoulder.

“Indeed,” Flam chimed in.

“So… what’s da problem?” I asked, still in my Arnie voice. They quickly started to do a dance and musical about… mobsters and underground business and… “Wait… What?!” I gasped, dropping my accent and breaking their musical stride.

“What?” they both asked in unison.

“Did you… just say… mobsters?” I asked. The two brothers looked to each other, then back to me.

“Well… it is Manehatten after all. What were you expecting? Rainbows and butterflies?” they asked and I couldn’t help but snicker.

“Yeah… kind of,” I replied and they both groaned then ushered me into the garage. They had some gizmos… it looked pretty cool actually. “What is this stuff?” I asked and Flam brushed his hoof.

“Nothing really, just some very basic things that you might need.” But Flim gasped.

“Nothing really?! Are you kidding me?! I put hours… days! Into these. It’s more than just essentials. They are The essentials you’ll need for this mission,” Flim informed me and Flam just scoffed.

“The most important thing is this, which I made myself.” Flam handed me some canister, and inside was vial filled with green goo.

“Oh please, any five year old filly could’ve made that! And you didn’t even make the important stuff,” Flim spat and it quickly escalated… kind of. They had a hissy fight in which they both stood up on their hindlegs and started flicking their hooves at each other… seriously?

I just rolled my eyes. “Hey, guys?” I asked, breaking up their little sissy fight. “You mind telling me just what exactly you need me to do?” I asked and Flam beat Flim to the punch.

“We need you to deliver that to our friends in Manehatten. You’ll need to get in via dingy boat and-“ I cut him short.

“Woah… wait a minute. If this is Manehatten, why can’t I just go there by… train or something?” I asked and they both shook their heads feverishly.

“Oh no,” Flam started and Flim chimed in.

“If you’re caught with that green slime, you’ll be imprisoned for life,” Flim informed me and my eyes went wide.

“WOAH, WHAT THE FUCK AM I HOLDING?!” I gasped, fearing perhaps that it was some kind of nerve agent.

“The secret formula to boosted nutrient grain,” Flam stated and I was at a loss for words.

“Wait… what?” I asked in confusion. Flim rolled his eyes then handed me a newspaper that was dated a few months back. The title read about some kind of new experimental nutrient grain that was stolen. Apparently it was so inexpensive that it was supposed to be the answer for poorer families…

“Wait… what the fuck is going on?” I asked and Flam huffed.

“One of our friends from the Manehatten mob family stole this, but he needed to keep it under the radar so he gave it to us to hold onto until the heat died down. Now that it has, you’ll deliver it to the family in Manehatten at the docks near the harbor. From there, they’ll ship it to some of their business associates who are going to market it as a newer product and make a fortune, and that’s all you need to know,” Flam informed me.

“I’m not exactly the kind of guy to do this sort of thing. Shouldn’t we just return it?” I asked but Flim huffed.

“Oh, so after we help you out in Ponyville, you just turn your back on us!” he huffed and I gasped.

“No, it’s not like that!” I replied quickly. “It’s just that… doesn’t this seem a little illegal?” I asked and Flim rolled his eyes.

“Well, yes and no. You see, it’s illegal because they’ve patented this specimen here. But the bastards stole it from another company. Just look.” Flim handed me a newspaper that was dated a few years back. The main title was about some company building going up in flames after a strange and suspicious fire in which their newest and most promising product went missing. The product, coincidentally, was a new nutrient bar that was supposed to supplement the user with a day’s worth of nutrients for an inexpensive price tag.

“Wait a minute,” I began. “If it’s this obvious, why haven’t the authorities figured it out?” I asked and both Flim and Flam burst into laughter.

“OH! AH-HA-HA! OOOOOH! OH… Wait… you’re not serious… are you?” they both asked and I had a rather dumbfounded look on my face.

Flam said, “It’s Manehatten. The crime bosses simply pay off the authorities and word never leaves the state.” That did make some sense. I figured this world to be perfect and I knew for a fact that Celestia probably wouldn’t tolerate this kind of crime, so having an inside state corrupt law force was kind of believable, but that left one thing…

“So how will I know them?” I asked and Flim presented me with some sort of digital touch screen thingy.

“Here. It’s like a map on a screen that you can move around.” He turned to his brother. “Told you he’d need it!” he snapped. I looked at the other equipment. There was a big duffle bag looking…

“Don’t touch that!” Flim burst out and I stepped back. “That’s an inflatable dingy craft. If you set it off now, you’ll have a difficult time getting it to the river. It’s a one-time inflatable raft, so use it wisely,” he informed me. And finally there was the sealed canister with the nutrient grain stuff.

Flam picked up the canister and gave it to me. “Best of luck. And remember: Don’t get caught by the authorities. And if you do, you’ve never heard of any of us, just a private investor of sorts,” Flam ordered.

“So… how do I do this?” I asked…

* * *

Hours later…
The night air was a little chilly. The river was rather calm and settling. The forest around me seemed more like a prison though… It was so thick and gloomy looking. I constantly heard the chatter of nocturnal animals howling and screeching.

The plan seemed simple enough, even if it was a little on the illegal side. I just had to paddle downstream in this little dingy, and by morning I would be at some offshore docks in Manehatten where I’d meet up with the F brothers’ contact. The F brothers’ contact was from the Liotta family, or at least that’s what they said. Apparently he'd be the only one at the docks, since the harbor nearby was closed at nights.

From there I’d drop off the vial and voila! Mission accomplished… of course it wasn’t always as easy as it sounded. Though I was traveling downstream, I had to paddle the dingy.

They did give me some cool equipment though. The first, most notable thing was the cool little map thingy. It was kind of like a GPS in the fact that it was digital. But at the same time, it was more like a map that I could simply scroll through, and all in the size of a small handheld device.

The dingy wasn’t all that great, but they did make a custom chest harness that housed several magazines for Belladonna. It kinda looked like some sorta… old detective chest harness… I chuckled to myself as I continued paddling downstream.

The vial case was nothing special really. I had also retrieved my Bowie knife and Buck knife, strapping the Bowie to my hip and the Buck knife to my ankle sheath. Other than that, there was nothing to really talk about.

The stream suddenly started to pick up. “Huh?” I muttered to myself, squinting my eyes to try and make sense of why the stream was travelling so fast all of a sudden.

Up ahead I caught sight of what looked like the edge of a waterfall… “Oh goddammit…” I hissed to myself. Those idiots told me it would be straight stream all the way there.

I paddled to shore and walked over to the waterfall. It was a straight downfall all around… “Goddammit,” I muttered, scowling rather irritably. I kicked the dingy craft and it went soaring over the waterfall.

Now in hindsight, I suppose I could’ve used that, but… on the flip side, I wouldn’t be able to carry it down the cliff’s face… then again, I couldn’t climb down the cliff at all. I didn’t have any gear.

“Figures…” I started mumbling to myself in a rather annoyed voice. This was just wonderful… just terrific. I started following the cliff’s edge, trying to find a way down. Once down, I’d just have to back track to the river.

After what seemed like hours… I checked my watch to see that it had only been half an hour. On top of that, it was 1:12 am…

“Oh my god…” I moaned in exhaustion. This was just a stupid plan. I wouldn’t even be able to backtrack to the garage for fuck’s sake. Flim and Flam had dropped me off at the river then drove my truck back to their garage to ‘Hold on to it’ for me.

“Oh hey Burdy, I have a great idea!” I mocked Flam’s voice. “Why don’t you go do this thing for us that we haven’t thought through! YEAH! GREAT IDEA!” I continued to mutter irritable things to myself.

I saw that if I travelled through the forest, it gradually became thick brush, but it might be possible to reach the river from there. I rolled my eyes and started making my way into the forest.

The undergrowth was dense. Not even five feet into the forest… no, this was no forest, this was more like a goddamn jungle. The plants were more tropical like, the ambiance matched a jungle atmosphere… everything screamed rainforest jungle… hell, there was even an Anaconda perched in a tree just a few dozen yards away.

It was extremely hot… hell, just ten feet into this place and there was a near fifteen degree climate change. The humidity was thick and the bugs were no help. Mosquitoes constantly latched to my neck and bit me.

I began to overheat in my duster coat and had to roll up my sleeves to try and alleviate my body’s temperature. It didn’t help much. My body still felt the heat and, worse yet, the mosquitoes believed me to be a buffet.

Added to the fact that these jungle mosquitoes were over twice the size of a regular house blood sucker… I frowned in anger. When I got back, I was going to tear Flim and Flam a new one…

My eyes caught a glimpse of something flashing in the shimmering moonlight. I ducked into a nearby thicket and peered into the small open space. What looked like a… either an original AK47…. or perhaps a very well resembled replica… maybe a wood furnished AKM…

“Wait… why the hell is there an AK in Equestria?” I muttered to myself.

‘Whatever the reason, it could be a trap,’ my conscience chimed. I nodded and licked my lips. Using my left hand to scratch the back of my head, I kept myself in a low stance as I crouched towards the gun.

“Regardless…” I muttered. I kept my senses high as I approached the assault gun. Now closer… it was an AKM. I could tell due to the cylindrical muzzle recoil compensator. That and the wooden stock was a bit straighter and longer than what an AK-47 would’ve been. As I got within reaching distance, I noticed another AKM telltale. The rear sight measured from 100-1000 meters, whereas the original AK47 only went to 800… that and the sliding notch was on the left side, where as the AK47 was originally on the right.

I went to pick it up but stopped. ‘Why is there an AKM in Equestria?’ my conscience asked. My fingers dangled above the gun as my heart began to pound in my chest. I stepped back then crouched lower to try and get a look at the underside of the gun.

Unsheathing my Buck knife with my right hand, I gently elevated the underside of the gun, but only slightly. I slowly and cautiously poked around underneath the rifle with the sleek blade of my knife, feeling for any telltale signs of a simplistic booby trap.

I tilted the gun up a little more, only to see nothing. I felt around the length of the gun for perhaps det-cord… but still found nothing. “Maybe the Equestrian gods are looking down upon me with smiles…” I whispered as I placed the stock to my shoulder then tilted the gun ninety degrees counter clockwise.

I pulled back the bolt with my left hand, only to find the feeding block was stiff, really stiff. I peeked into the gun to find not only was it unloaded… but the gun was gritty and mucky inside. Filled with corrosion and powder fouling… this gun looked like it had seen every war since it had been created and never been cleaned once… but I bet it would still fire… I did have 7.62x39mm for my SKS which was the same as…

Hairs prickled up on the back of my neck as my pupils went wide. My vision darted to my immediate surroundings. Something felt terribly off, and it wasn’t the fact that there was an AKM in Equestria. My senses started going berserk. I could hear my heart beating inside my head.

I cautiously stepped back… things were getting sketchy. The jungle birds no longer sang their happy tunes… instead, it was complete silence. I sniffed the air. I had no idea how I caught wind of it but… I smelt something… not of this world.

I quickly backpedalled into the deeper forest and back towards the waterfall. I didn’t like the smell of this. Weird, I somehow picked up its scent before I even saw it… whatever it was.

I moved quietly, the only sound being the underbrush squishing beneath my feet. Though not very quick, my pace was silent… and almost impossible to hear unless one was right beside me.

I stopped as something in the distance snapped. It sounded like a twig being stepped on. I sniffed the air and again smelt the lingering scent of… something.

I stiffened up as I felt my heart begin to race. I quickly paced over to a tree trunk and pressed my back up against it, the old battered AKM in my hands. Sweat was beading down my face in profuse amounts.

Some sweat dribbled into my eyes and stung my vision. I grunted and tilted my head to the side to try and wipe them clean. Just as I did, I seemed to go deaf. A brilliant flash seared bright in the dark gloomy forest as a snappy gunshot rang out.

A bunch of splinters assaulted the back of my neck and I fell to the ground. However, it wasn’t my neck that was in pain… it was my shoulder. My eyes clenched shut as I bellowed in pain.

It was then I realized that I had a clean bullet hole right through the thicker part of my left shoulder. If I hadn’t have moved my head to wipe my eyes, I would’ve bitten the bullet… quite literally, but I couldn’t dwell on that now.

Suddenly, all hell seemed to break loose. A constant chatter echoed in the forest as the dirt all around me was kicked up in a hell storm. I rolled to one side, leaving the useless AKM on the ground. It served no purpose to me now.

Blood seeped from my shoulder, but it didn’t seem fatal… at least not yet. It could get infected I suppose.

Unholstering my mighty hand cannon, I rolled behind a tree, putting the thick trunk between myself and my assailant. More echoing rang out, but the shots were still directed towards the ground where I had been moments before, shredding up dirt and grass.

I swivelled around the tree and went for a two handed stance, but ended up groaning in pain as my left arm refused to move as fast as I needed it to.

“The fuck?!” a voice yelled, just an instant before the gunfire was directed to my new location. I had caught a glimpse of where the muzzle flash had come from, but now I was pinned down.

The chatter sounded like a light caliber, intermediate cartridge most likely. Added to the fact that the shots seemed snappy and quick, it was most likely not Russian origin… perhaps American or British... but how the hell is there a British gun in Equestria. To my knowledge, I was the only one with any sort of firearm.

The chattering stopped and I burst from my cover, my monstrous pistol booming several times. Rings of fire protruded just inches past the muzzle each time the bullets made their hasty exit.

Firing Belladonna in one hand while running was a chore to say the least, but I still managed to keep my shots directed towards where I thought the assault barrage had come from.

In just under five seconds, Belladonna ran dry. The slide locked back and I swore to myself as I slid behind another tree. I cursed as I tried to fumble another magazine into the gun.

Just before I could eject the magazine, another burst of auto fire blasted away at the tree I was hiding behind. Splinters sprang through the air, several slicing my cheeks and forehead.

I shimmied around the tree and out of the line of fire. I cursed as I realized I wouldn’t be allotted the time to reload. Instead I merely strapped my pistol back into her holster. I had either one of two options I could think of, try and escape, or fight it head on.

Since this assailant had assault weapons and I had an empty hand cannon that I would have trouble loading… it was pretty clear which choice I was going to take. I grabbed a nearby stick and tossed it into the thick grass to my right.

Automatic chatter echoed and the grass was shredded up. In seconds the shooting ceased and I took my chance. Running straight forwards and into the jungle’s depths, I put as much distance between my assailant and me as I could before it had the chance to reload.

I didn’t make it that far before the rattling of automatic gunfire started again. Lucky for me the jungle was so thick, the creature or… whatever it was, probably couldn’t get a clean shot.

My heart continued pounding as my shoulder soared with a new pain. Funny… of all the stories I heard about getting shot being extremely painful, this wasn’t too-too bad… but then again it was a clean shot, in one end and out the other… that and it was a small caliber.

I broke into a clearing and gulped, I was near the river. In foolishness, I dared a glance back, only to be gifted by the sight of dense forest. For some reason I had the feeling that whatever it was attacking me would’ve been right there waiting for me with a machete… maybe I watched too many horror movies as a kid.

I rushed alongside the river, heading upstream in an attempt to lose my attacker. In my foolishness, perhaps I should have stayed in the jungle, but it was too thick in there to make a quick getaway, and I figured maybe I could outrun my hidden enemy.

As I ran upstream, the hairs on the back of my neck prickled up. A shiver went down my spine. I took the thought seriously and lept into a nearby thicket then began to crawl back into the jungle.

My mind began to race. I had no idea where that thing was… but it probably knew exactly where I was. I huddled up against a tree trunk and gasped painfully as my shoulder refused to allow me agile arm movement. My hair was now wet with sweat and my shirt served no better. Every garment of clothing I had was nearly soaked, mostly from sweat but some from the blood that now seeped from my shoulder.

Blood stained the sleeve of my duster coat along with my previously white T-shirt. I caught the gleam of metal shining in the moonlight and ducked as quickly as I could. Just as I did, the spot where my head had only recently been lit up like a hand grenade.

Splinters of wood spewed as the thing with the assault rifle started at me again. I began to creep through the heavy grass as fast as I could, but it must’ve noticed my presence.

An unbearable pain buzzed through my right thigh. “GAH!” I screamed in agony as I rolled to my left. My eyes clenched shut as my face twitched in pain. I quickly started rolling as fast as I could through the condensed grass. Bullets chewed up the ground where I had previously been. Small projected pellets followed me like some sorta angry tornado.

Luck must’ve had it that the creature’s gun ran out of ammo, because the gunshots stopped momentarily. Unfortunately I thought too soon. A light explosion ripped apart the ground a few yards in front of me.

The concussive blast lifted me off the ground and sent me hurtling through the air. My body rag dolled against a tree and fell to the ground in a clump. I groaned painfully as I crawled through the grass and to another nearby tree.

I pressed myself up against the tree, putting it between myself and the attacker, whom still had an unprecedented advantage over me.

I twisted my right leg slightly to see the wound. It was bad, the bullet didn’t pass through. I caught the slight glimpse of steel just before the hole in my leg filled with blood.

This was bad. A bullet was lodged into the bone in my thigh… the femur I think it’s called. This was really, really, REALLY bad…

I heard steps threshing through the grass. Whoever… whatever, this was… it wasn’t much for stealth. I could hear its breathing. Heavy breathing… adrenaline pulsing through its body no doubt.

I could almost smell the sweat off its body. A dark figure started to come into view, the barrel of what looked like an M16A2 with an M203 grenade launcher, leading the way. With every inch of strength I had, I lashed out at the creature, going for the gun barrel.

I pulled the barrel away from my body and drove a head-butt into the creature's head. This beast was bipedal… human?! The human, who looked female due to the set of breasts, staggered back.

I took no time in yanking the gun away to the left, but she fluidly gripped the barrel with her left hand while the handgrip rested in her left. She pulled with her right hand, pulling the barrel towards her while forcing the other end of the gun towards me and stepped forwards, slamming the stock of the black rifle into my face.

I staggered back and she went to finish me off with a point blank blast. With every cell in my body in a fueled rage, I neglected the pain that roared for me to stop. Lunging forwards, I pulled the barrel to the right then drove the rifle flat against her chest before head-butting her once more.

She staggered back from the aggressive hit, but as I moved forwards, she simply gripped the collar of my coat and twisted her body. I was shocked as she pulled me over her shoulder, swiveled her body, and plowed my body into the ground. My back hit the unforgiving ground, nearly knocking the wind from my lungs completely.

I saw a barrel coming down towards my face. My left leg shot straight up and back, hitting her upper chest, near her throat. She hacked and her aim was thrown off. Grabbing the barrel off the rifle with my left and the handgrip with my right, I pulled myself into a forwards roll, ripping the rifle from her grip as I rolled to a crouched stance, swiveling at the last moment to face her.

I quickly took aim and pulled the trigger.

CLICK!

She leapt through the air and delivered a straight kick to my chest, knocking me back and onto my ass. I rolled completely backwards, my right leg burning in an unforgiving pain of which I have almost never known before. But I pushed through the pain, knowing that if I didn’t… I’d die.

I had dropped the rifle when she kicked me and she now possessed the firearm. She went to pull back the charging handle but it wouldn’t budge. The weapon looked to be jammed with mud and other jungle muck.

“Shit!” she swore, just as I made my most valiant assault. I charged forwards and attempted to simply overpower her, but with one arm, it wouldn’t be easy. Attempting to ground tackle her, she merely overcame my attack with a counter. She swung her left arm across my face while pushing against my bad left shoulder with her right palm. Her right leg swung behind my legs, and finally she pulled me to the ground, all in the blink of an eye, with what looked like a simplistic hand to hand combat technique.

I went to get up, but a boot connected with my stomach, knocking the wind out of me. I wheezed for air but didn’t get much as the woman quickly took me into a vicious chokehold. She pulled me to my feet then began dragging me backwards, giving me no chance to gain any sort of foothold.

At the last possible second, her right arm drifted away and quickly came back with what looked like a Beretta. Though whether it was a 92FS, a 93R or an M9 was beyond me. All I saw was the barrel coming for my temple.

In a last ditch effort, I reached around with my right hand and yanked her arm forwards, over my shoulder. Her body lost balance and she tipped forwards. Through searing agony, I reached around my right shoulder with my left arm and gripped the back of her hair with both hands.

Pulling her forwards, I reefed her over my shoulder and onto her back, jamming my knee into her chest as I hammered her down hard. In a brief motion, one of her knees shot up and hit me in the temple. Off balance and dazed, I staggered back in a struggle to regain posture.

In a blur, I spotted her lining up a shot. The pistol was either a 92FS, or an M9… I wasn’t quite sure, but both were almost identical minus the few tidbits here and there. My right hand lunged for the gun, grabbing the slide and reefing it back before she could even get a shot.

My thumb immediately pressed on the disassembly button located on the right side of the gun, the left side from where I was standing. At the same instance, my middle finger flipped down the disassembly lever located on the left side of the gun.

The woman yanked the gun back, probably thinking I was trying to steal it from her grip. In the process, she pretty much finalized the removal of the slide. As she pulled back, the slide assembly remained in my hand and she pointed the rest of the pistol in my face before pulling the trigger, but naturally, nothing happened.

She looked to the gun in disbelief and I spoke first. “Maybe a sturdier pistol would suit you better,” I taunted. In truth, there was nothing really wrong with Berettas, they were a fine gun…

We circled around each other like caged animals, nearing the river each time we did a complete circle. “So what are you? SAS? Spetsnaz? Joint Task Force?” she asked in fine English.

“Redneck,” I replied honestly, not quite understanding why she thought me to be military. Hell, I didn’t even have my fatigues on.

“Bullshit, with how you move… you have to have had some kind of training. No civilian could’ve lived through that!” she spat and I just shrugged. There wasn’t much to fear from her at this very moment.

She was better at hand to hand than I was, that I was sure of, but as long as I kept my distance she couldn’t quite get me. Both of her weapons were non-functioning. She slipped out a knife from a hip sheath.

‘Well shit… so much for that,’ my conscience thought. I took a defensive stance and started backpedalling at a slow pace, not making it look like I was going to make a run for it… truth be told, I couldn’t. With how my leg was, I could barely stand.

Before I knew it, I was standing on the edge of the cliff, directly beside the waterfall. ‘Dammit… between a waterfall and a sharp thing…’ I thought to myself.

“Don’t suppose we can talk this out huh?” I asked. She took a quick swipe at me with the knife, keeping her free hand at the ready for a counter offensive. I leaned back, the blade just skimming my chest. My shirt was now cut and blood dribbled out of a minor flesh wound.

I had two choices. One: Fight and most likely die… or Two…

She got ready for another strike. Her stance was weird and definitely not just some kind of throw-down, duke-it-out brawler stance. She had class to her stance… perhaps she was some kind of military… I didn’t think twice. I chose option two.

As she went for the killing blow, I let my body fall back over the edge of the cliff. My body plummeted downwards and hit the unforgiving water far below. I was pulled along through the underwater current and couldn’t even manage to get myself to the surface before the back of my head hit something hard, probably a stone, and my whole world went black…

* * *

Ponyville library, third person…

Lassie arose from her sleep as her ears perked up. Something inside her felt awful… just terrible. She trotted upstairs, pushing open the basement door. Her paws barely even made a noise as she walked through the quiet library. Only the moonlight that protruded from the window gave any sort of lighting to the library. Lassie hopped up some shelves and squeezed out the front window and onto the lawn outside.

There was no wind present and the air was warm and peaceful. Lassie still had a painful feeling inside of her. Looking to the moon, which was only a waxing crescent, she sat on her rump and looked to the night sky above.

Sucking in deep, she released her emotions in a long and saddened howl that echoed throughout the night air sky, reaching even as far as the Everfree. But never once was did the howl become significantly loud. Her howl seemed to be almost mystic.

Her howl soon faded, but she quickly let out another cry of equal sadness and mysticism. Her howl wasn’t quite loud enough to wake anypony, but again it managed to travel throughout Ponyville and reach the edge of the Everfree forest. Her cries of sadness filled the still night air, howls of sadness meant for the one she held so dear…

Author's Note

So, regarding the title picture, a few people have commented saying that it should be different. So VariusMayhem said I should maybe use something like this

Then Tiamat said to me that I should use the one picture I have of me and basically said it would fit pretty well with the story

Anyway, maybe you guys/gals have possible suggestions or maybe you like the title picture, but I just thought maybe I'd ask and try to figure something out?

Chapter 23

Contains explicit content

‘Ol’ pals…’

Tuesday, May 5th, 2014…

I awoke from what could be considered sure death as I felt my body being dragged along some shoreline sand. I coughed viciously as water in my lungs threatened to drown me. “Take it easy, you’ll live,” said an all too familiar voice.

The hand dragging me by the hind neck of my duster coat released me. A large man stepped beside me then knelt down and pulled away the shoulder of my duster coat. “Bullet went right through,” he muttered.

“Der… Derreck… ACH, GAH!” I began coughing up water and he rolled me to my side.

“Easy… take it easy… bullet went right through your shoulder,” he informed me, almost as if I didn’t know.

“My leg!” I gasped and he nodded before pinning my shoulders to the ground.

“I know. The bullet is jammed in your femur,” he informed me, again almost as if I was unknowing in regards to my condition.

“I know!” I gritted my teeth together in pain while he restrained me.

“We shouldn’t pull out the bullet… but you won’t make it far with it lodged where it is…” he said, trailing off before bringing up a stick. “Open wide.”

“I’m not-“ He cut me off by jamming the stick in my mouth.

“Bite down hard, this is gonna hurt.” He held the stick in my mouth and I nodded reluctantly. Removing his hand from my face, I felt his hand reside just below the wound on my right leg.

My leg stiffened in anticipation, a painful gust surging through my body. “Relax and stop contracting your muscles, it’ll be easier that way,” he ordered.

“Ea-y fow you to s-say,” I grumbled through the restriction of the stick in my mouth. I tried my best to ease my leg muscles but I found it difficult with all the pain surging through my leg. This was far worse than any cramp I had endured. It was probably on par with the time I had my knee smashed while my lower and upper leg was twisted in two different directions during one of my football games… maybe even worse than that.

“Okay… on three,” he told me. I gasped through the stick.

“Don’ fuc’in’ ‘ell me, jus’k pull!” I tried to yell through the stick. He obliged. With that, I felt a pair of pliers enter my body via the gunshot wound. “EERRRRRCH AHHHRGH! FUUUUUCK!” I groaned as he slowly plunged the pliers further. He was probably just being cautious, there were a lot of arteries there if my mind was correct, and this was very dangerous.

After what felt like hours, and was actually only a matter of seconds, I felt something being pulled from my bone and finally out from my body. I spit the stick out and roared in pain as my arms rose up, fingers curling. “GARRRRGH! FUCK THAT HURT!” I hissed and Derreck simply chuckled.

“Well I don’t think getting shot was intended to feel pleasant,” he retorted and I shot him a cold glare.

“How the hell did you find me?” I asked as he stood up and he merely shrugged.

“Oh… well you know,” he stated as he began walking away.
“Where… where the fuck… are you going?” I wheezed but he didn’t even look back as he responded to my question.

“I have some things I’ve been wanting to do. You’ll feel better when you wake up, I promise,” he informed me.

My mind began to haze just as he said that. I rolled to my side and reached out with my left hand, almost as if to grab and stop him. My vision blurred and I could barely make out his presence as he was walking away. “Derreck…” I moaned just before my face dropped into the cold, soft sand…

* * *

Normandy, 1944…

I found myself standing in a ramshackle town… everything had a grey hue to it. Even the sky was shady… I had never seen this place before, but it looked like some kinda...

My gaze was drawn upwards as a loud bomber plane flew overhead. My eyes went wide, 'What the hell is this?' I wondered feverishly. Without warning, something drilled through my shoulder, and a second later a gunshot echoed throughout the town. My body was pulled to the left as the force from the gunshot threw off my balance. I gripped my wounded shoulder with a wince of pain. Almost as if a signal to others, the lone gunshot was followed by a hailstorm of gunfire that razed throughout the shattered town.

The streets lit up with light grey flashes. Bullets whizzed through the air all around me. Stray shots ripped through my body, causing me to wince in minor pain, almost as if the gunshots were just mere mosquito bites.

My feet ran without my order but before I could even make it to the dinner in which I wanted to make my escape, my white T-shirt became shredded from all the gunfire. Blood gushed from my wounds as I lept through the dinner’s front window.

I groaned in irritation as my wounds quickly began to seal shut. Taking to a knee, I closed my eyes and tilted my head back to face the ceiling as I let out a sigh. I opened my eyes and the sides of my vision seemed to blur while the center seemed to sharpen itself.

Scents from the nearby attackers entered my nostrils while everything but their gunshots and screams were drowned out from my hearing. My body rushed up to its feet and I began rushing forwards in a rage.

“THERE IT IS!” screamed one of the attackers. I could tell he was German, judging by his accent. ‘Why the hell is he speaking in English?’ I wondered silently.

“SHOOT IT!” screamed another. Time seemed to slow, but my pace never did as my body accelerated to an unnatural speed. Bullets whizzed past me while the soldiers seemed to move at an almost still rate.

Their weapons jerked in their hands each time a muzzle flash would erupt, spitting out another lead shot towards me. My arms stayed in front of my chest, almost leading my path as I closed the gap between myself and my closest attacker.

Within the last few feet, I lunged forwards, my hands gripping his throat and tackling him to the ground while my knees bent for another lunge. Crushing his body to the ground, I lept from the first attacker to the second.

My right hand lashed out, gripping him too by the throat as my feet established contact with the ground. I lifted him off his feet while his buddies hosed me down with an enormous quantity of bullets.

I however, was nearly unaffected by the fatal assault. My skin was torn by the bullets but my vitals kept working. Holes in my body became ever present as more and more slugs chewed through me.

I swung my right arm back, swinging his body back with it, and then effortlessly tossed him into another of my assailants. A sniper projectile ripped through the back of my right shoulder, twisting my body forwards.

I took note, but didn’t act on the sniper as of yet. I moved on the last two remaining men that were left. There were technically four, but two were unconscious and of no threat to me.

I slowly stepped towards them as they continued to spray me with automatic fire. My body simply took the harsh punishment as if it was nothing, my brain no longer receiving any indications of pain.

I approached the man on the left and grabbed the barrel of his submachine gun with my right hand. I yanked the gun forwards as my left hand moved for the pistol grip. As I quickly ripped the German submachine gun from his grasp, my hands naturally swivelled into place.

My right hand slid across the front of the weapon, grabbing a proper hold on the foregrip of the rifle. My left hand pivoted on the pistol grip, left trigger finger slipping into the guard. In a left hand grip, I triggered the weapon and lit up the former owner.

His backside spewed with crimson as he was pushed back from the force of the deadly weapon. His buddy tried fearfully to reload his weapon, a deployable German MG42. I stepped towards him and he gasped. Without my command, my right hand moved forwards all on its own.

My grip ripped the gun from his hands then simply dropped it at his feet. He went wide eyed as I took an aggressive step towards him then shot my hand for his chest.

He squeaked in fear, closing his eyes in hopes of escaping the horror. But before he knew it, I was walking away from him, my back facing him. He went slack jawed in astonishment. It was only then did he realize that I had removed the pull cord from the hand grenade harnessed to his uniform.

He screamed as he quickly tried to remove the live grenade, but it didn’t last more than a second. The grenade erupted, vaporizing most of his body in the explosion as I walked away.

A sudden gunshot went off and my head was pulled back and to the left. Almost casually, my head returned to its former position as the gaping hole in the top left of my forehead sealed shut.

A glint of light shone atop of a four story building. Without the need of my command, my body quickly began rushing forwards, almost as if on some kind of autopilot. Gunshots echoed in quick succession. Bullets chimed against the concrete rubble beneath my feet but ultimately missed their mark.

A quick pause quieted the town as I rushed for the building. The sniper was no doubt having to reload. Just as I came close to the building, a fizzing flash came whistling towards me.

FWOOOOSH!

A small rocket propelled warhead rushed past me and erupted just yards behind my body. The resulting impact sent me hurtling through the flimsy, burnt out wall of the building. I raised my head with a groan, several deep cuts spurting blood.

With my wounds still not healed, I stood up and began rushing up the flight of nearby stairs, a trail of blood following me. Echoes of gunshots still thundered in the streets but didn't take my attention. My wounds healed just as I reached the third floor, ending the blood trail.

Just as I reached the final set of stairs, a rapid chattering rattled in the stairwell. There was a man at the top of the stairs, hosing me with something along the lines of a C96 Mauser, but I couldn't tell for sure.

My body instinctively charged up the stairs with no thought of self-preservation. The man screamed and moved to the side as I burst onto the roof with a roar. He quickly reloaded his pistol then continued to spit lead at me as I began to slowly walk towards him.

His chattering created wounds faster than my body could heal. But before long, his weapon ran dry. He pulled on the trigger several times, each resulting in a CLICK!

He dropped the gun and fell onto his rump. He began shimmying backwards as he tried to escape my wrath. As he reached the edge of the building roof, my wounds all sealed shut, making it seem as if I had never once been injured.

“What the fuck are you?” he asked in a petrified voice.

I smirked, and in an undeniable Arnie accent, I gave him the answer. “Yer worse nightmare.” My right foot snugged up underneath his rump and gave him an encouraging nudge off the building.

My eyes went wide as I watched him fall, a serious look spread across my face. His screams didn’t even last a second before his body splatted against the concrete below…

* * *

I awoke with a gasp from the very strange dream. The light of the morning sun temporarily blinding me. My left hand quickly shielded my eyes as I squirmed to sit up. It took only a second for me to clue in to the fact that something was wrong… well maybe not wrong in a bad way, but something was not right.

My left shoulder no longer hurt… and my left leg could move without…

As I moved my left hand away, I realized that I no longer had a nasty hole in my leg… in fact, I didn’t even have a scar. Just a hole in my trousers where the wound used to be.

I stood up in shock. Something was off… this was almost as weird as that time I was burnt then suddenly not burnt… no, this was equally as weird…

Memories of what had happened when I was pulled from the water arose in my mind… and Derreck was somehow in Equestria… and that crazy lady who had shot me… how the fuck did they get here?! On top of that, why the fuck did that lady even attack me?!

I flopped down onto my back and simply stared into the morning sky. This was so complicated. First mobsters in Manehatten, then crazy lady with a gun. Derreck was in Equestria, which wasn’t so bad... minus the pliers to the leg. But finally I had this weird thing with my skin or something…

I noticed my semi-dry cowboy hat beside me and grabbed it, placing it over my face as I groaned loudly.

‘Why can’t things just go back to being all fluffy and cuddly?’ my conscience pouted. I lay for a moment before realizing what the hell I had just said.

“WHAT?!” I gasped as I arose. “This is what I’ve been wanting for the last few months! A piece of the old world. Some action!” I announced before turning and looking down river… actually, it wasn’t really a river. I was on the shoreline of an ocean… or maybe a sea. Not too far away was a harbor and the respective docks.

I looked to what I had believed to be a stream and began to gag, nearly puking. I could now taste the horrid, rancid, goddess awful taste of polluted city water in my mouth. It probably would never leave for the duration of my trip.

I stomached the fact that polluted water had been in my mouth and began making my way for the harbor. I needed to find the F brothers’ contact and give him this stupid goo…

I trailed off for a moment and checked my gear. I still had the canister, along with my pistol, harness, and extra magazines. And I also had that little digital map do-hickey.

The sounds of the massive metropolis quickly filled my ears as I entered the harbor. Flim had told me to meet this stallion at the docks and here I was, but there was just one big, huge, massive, sprawling problem.

There were now workers all over the place. I didn’t have a picture of the guy, hell, I didn’t even have his name. All I knew was that I was supposed to meet somepony at the docks… ‘Well that plan’s all but blown to hell,’ I thought. I didn’t even have a way of contacting Flim and Flam to inform them that I was having technical difficulties.

“Oh for fuck's sake,” I muttered as I began moving my way through the crowds. Maybe if this stallion, or hell, maybe it was going to be a mare, I didn’t even really know that… anyway, maybe if this pony was a mobster then they’d be wearing a suit rather than laborer apparel.

“HEY BUDDY!” a voice yelled out, catching my attention. I looked over to a worker who trotted up to me. “You can’t be here, staff only!” he informed me.

“Uh… oh-h,” I stuttered nervously. “Sorry, I didn’t know,” I apologized.

“Can’t you fuckin’ read?” he asked vulgarly… funny, this was the first time I had really heard a pony swear out of the blue.

“Uh… what?” I asked and he pointed to a sign that read ‘Authorized personnel only’.

“Get the fuck outta here yah fuckin immigrant!” he swore at me and I quickly obliged him and left. I suppose I could have gotten aggressive but I didn’t want to make a scene. Especially if I was carrying some highly illegal goo stuff.

I began to walk aimlessly through the slums near the dock… Oh man… why did this Manehatten have to be so sketchy just like the real one? I swear, from the stories I heard, that I was probably in this world’s version of Washington Heights or something… but I don’t think Washington Heights was near any docks.

I turned down a street, or at least I thought it was a street, and began trekking down the underside of a road overpass. I continued down the street, which was now looking more like just a shitty sidewalk.

Before I could think, two grey stallions stepped in front of me, while at the same time two purple ones stepped out from behind me. “Whatcha doin’ in our neighbourhood?” he asked and I gulped.

“N-n-nothing,” I stammered as I stepped to the side, putting them all into my immediate vision.

“Well if it’s just nothing then I’m sure yah’ll won’t mind payin’ the toll tah pass.” He pulled out a long blade and waved it in my direction. I swallowed feverishly. I could easily pull Belladonna and just wipe these guys out… but the noise might attract the law.

I could run but I didn’t know how fast these guys were. I didn’t have any money and I was positive that these guys wouldn’t know the threat Belladonna posed to them if I tried to threaten them with her.

Two of the other three pulled out smaller knives while the final one pulled out one of those hoof bow thingies… it kinda resembled the model that Felix had out in the desert but rather than a hand grip, it had a large semi circle ring on the front side of the handle with a rather large trigger, meant obviously for hooves.

“I… I uhh… I don’t have any money guys,” I stuttered and the leader put on a pouty face.

“Awe, yah hear that guys? The poor baby don’t got no money, awe boo-hoo,” he whined mockingly. I could just incapacitate them, non-vital shots. It’d give me the time to escape… plus if hoof bows were illegal, then who knows what else these guys had on them that the police would bust them for… if they even showed up. Who’s to say the law would even come.

“Come on guys… just let me go, I don’t mean yah no harm,” I said with a pleading voice. A small crowd had gathered and now watched. These bastards probably did this on a regular basis.

“Shut up bitch… we’ll settle for everything you got,” the leader laughed. I nodded as if to comply. Very slowly, I began to pull back the flaps on my duster coat, as if ready to slide it off. My shoulders rolled back, ready to drop the coat off my body.

In the last possible second, I snapped Belladonna out from her leg holster. The triangular muzzle quickly leveled for the stallion armed with the hoof bow. The hand cannon rocked in my hands as it boomed out a mighty shot that tore off his hoof, severing it at the wrist.

He screamed and fell to his back, writhing in pain as he gripped his stumped limb. The others all looked to me and one by one, I shot them all in the front kneecap. Three tremendous gunshots echoed in the already loud city, each followed by an agonizing scream. Each traumatizing impact nearly ripped their limb clean off, only leaving it connected by slim fibers of flesh and muscle tissue.

The screams of bystanders echoed in the streets as ponies rushed away. Blood spurted from their wounds as I quickly holstered my gun and made a getaway, not once even looking back.

I hadn’t even made it a hundred yards before I started hearing sirens. Somepony must’ve tipped the police… either that or all the gunshots and screams lured a nearby police officer this way.

I rushed through backyards and alleyways, trying to keep hidden in the shadows. I met with the wall of a dead-end alley and had to scale the wall. However, as I hopped over the top, I accidentally landed on a street vendor's cart, smashing all his goods into the dirty sidewalk.

“HEY! WHAT’S THE DEAL YOU ASSHOLE!” he yelled as I stood up, stains on my clothes. I didn’t even look at him as I noticed a stallion dressed in a blue uniform with an undeniable police style hat on.

The cop looked to me and he must’ve seen it in my eyes. I turned around in a quick pivot and rushed away. “HEY! FREEZE!” the cop yelled but I didn’t listen.

‘Oh-hoo! I’m now officially a wanted criminal!’ my conscience thought and I just rolled my eyes. I guess this is what I’ve been wishing for the last few months, a taste of my old world… well, maybe back on my old world I wasn’t running from the cops with a canister of highly illegal goo, but… it was good enough for the adrenaline rush.

Steel mesh fences rattled as I leapt from backyard to backyard. The police officer, now accompanied by at least three others, rushed after me. Two were heavily obese and quickly fell behind while the other duo were younger and more athletic.

I scampered around a corner and made for the city streets. Carriages, both motorized and manually towed, screeched to a stop as I rushed into traffic. “HEY, WHATSA MATTER WIT YOU?” screamed one of the New Yorkers… or whatever they call them in Equestria.

Another cop joined the pursuit. “STOP RIGHT THERE AND GET ON THE GROUND WITH YOUR HOOVES OVER YOUR HEAD!” screamed one of the cops.

“SIR I DON’T THINK HE HAS HOO-“ The cop was cut short as he was struck, non-fatally, by a carriage. I skidded around another corner and entered a very ritzy neighborhood. Scurrying around yet another corner in an attempt to lose the cops, I bumped into a trio of officers in front of a doughnut shop, all casually chowing down on their pastries.

I skidded to a halt and they all looked to me with blank expressions. It didn’t take long for them to realize what was going on as I sputtered a swear. Rushing over a backyard hedge, through the backyard, and across the front lawn I was finally back onto the streets. It all happened before the three overweight cops even had time to scale the hedge.

I rushed down the expensive looking neighborhood, taking corner after corner. The police shouting continued to follow me as I paced down a side alley that went through the backs of several mansion-like homes.

My senses kicked into high gear. I picked up the sounds of screaming from the other end of the alley. ‘Shit… shitshitshitshit-SHIT!’ my conscience quipped and I made a bold decision.

I grabbed the high brick wall and scaled over it, and through the planted trees on the other side. I was met by a mid-sized stallion in laborer clothing, and a bovine whom lay on a lawn chair with a martini glass in hoof.

The shouting of police quickly neared and I put on my most pleading face as I motioned them to stay quiet. ‘Please, don’t say anything,’ I mouthed in a needing way. The stallion went wide eyed as if to scream but the bovine held up her right hoof and motioned for him to settle.

After several minutes, the police shouting faded as they left the area in pursuit of where I may have gone. In minutes, they were searching several block away.

I let out a sigh but, before I knew it, the cow was talking. “Who the fuck are you?” she asked in a heavy Yorker accent. I went to reply but she hastily cut me short. “Never mind, why the fuck are you in my backyard?” she asked inquiringly.

Again I went to answer but still she abruptly asked another question just as I was opening my mouth. “Don’t fuckin’ answer that… where the hell’d you come from. I ain’t never seen somethin' like you in all my life.” Strangely enough, despite having a heavy York accent, she sounded rather feminine.

I was simply speechless. I had no idea what to say. “Well?” she asked in a rather annoyed tone. “I saved your ass, so you owe me that much. Unless you’re a fuckin’ mute.” She was rather profane, but it was rather humorous at the same time.

“Uhm… well… I uhh…” I trailed off, still not knowing what to say.

“Well what? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” she asked.

“Uhm… well… My name is Burdick, Evan Burdick, but yah can call me Burdy if yah fancy,” I stated. She frowned.

“Is that your fuckin’ way of talkin’ to a lady?” she asked and I gulped.

“Uhm… no ma’am,” I apologized and she held out her front left hoof in a very ladylike way.

“Well then, prove it. Introduce yourself like a real… whatever the fuck you are.” I stepped forwards very casually, knelt a little, took her hoof, and kissed it.

“I apologize madam. My name is Evan, but you may address me as Burdy if it is in your best interests,” I re-introduced myself in a very mannerly fashion. She pulled her hoof back in a disgusted way.

“I changed my mind. Don’t talk like that, you sound like some fuckin’ British faggot,” she regretfully announced. I snickered at her comment and she raised an eyebrow. “What? You think that’s funny?” she asked and I nodded. “So you think being a British fuckin’ faggot is hilarious?” she asked and I nearly burst into laughter.

Something about her was just priceless. “I’m sorry, you just make me laugh is all.” I wiped tears from my eyes while she put on a serious face.

“What? Do you think I’m a joke?” she asked seriously and I quickly corrected my statement.

“Oh-nonononono! Not at all! It’s just that how you addressed me was funny,” I stated and she raised an eyebrow.

“You like being talked down to?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Well… not really, but the way you did it was perfect,” I informed her. She thought for a moment before extending her right hoof for me to shake. I shook it before she quickly introduced herself by name.

“The name’s Hue… Hue Heifer,” she introduced herself and my jaw nearly dropped. That name sounded like…

“Wait… as in… THE Hugh Hefner? As in… the producer of Playboy?” I asked and she shook her head.

“No you idiot, listen to what I’m saying. HUE… HEIFER… Got it? And it’s Playcolt. I don’t know what the fuck a Playboy is,” she responded.

“Oh! Shit, sorry… it’s just that-“ but she quickly cut me off.

“I’m the producer of Playcolt and all its products,” she informed me and my jaw stayed slacked open. I had just met this world’s version of Hugh Hefner. “What’s the matter kid? Pussy got your tongue?” she asked and I snickered from her pun.

She rolled her eyes. “So kid… what brings you into the neighborhood?” she asked and I gulped before answering honestly; she had saved me from the police after all.

“I’m to meet with some contact in the Liotta family and give them some vial of green goo.” She sat there for a moment, swished her cocktail around, then downed the drink in one go.

“So,” she began as she set her glass aside, “you a mobster?” she asked and I shook my head. “Well… if you’re not a mobster, then why the hell are you helping the Liotta family?” she asked.

I gave her the short story of how Flim, Flam, and I were friends and how friends help one another, then how they roped me into this and the subsequent results of my first time in Manehatten.

She chuckled to herself. “Well kid… your contact won’t be waiting at the docks anymore, during the daytime that place is filled with workers and the Liotta’s wouldn’t dare a trade-off in broad daylight. The Gravelli family pretty much has eyes everywhere. Hell, they’re probably watching us right now,” she informed me.

“Who’s the Gravelli family?” I asked. She gave me a quick rundown about how this thing called ‘The Commission’ worked, and how the Gravelli and Liotta families were, and still are, rivals. All the while, she was drinking glass after glass of martini. “So how can I get this thing to the Liottas?” I asked and she shrugged.

“Well… if you’ve caused this much of a ruckus, then the Gravellies will probably have an eye or two on you, but you might try to head to the Liotta family homestead out in Uptown,” Hue informed me before pouring herself another glass and abruptly downing it.

“Uptown?” I asked and she quickly answered.

“Yeah… you know… Uptown?” she asked, almost like everypony should know Uptown. She let out a disgruntled sigh, pouring herself another glass. “Uptown is pretty much all Liotta family territory. No other families go into that area. Hell, not even the Mareixican cartel go into that area. Right near the seashore, there’s this ritzy… walled in neighbourhood… well it’s not really a neighbourhood, just four houses. The last one on the lane is the Don’s house. Ask the guards to talk to him. Tell ‘em what you told me an’ they’ll probably call him directly then let you in… if you’re telling the truth. If not, they’ll just shoot yah dead,” she informed me before tilting her hoof and hammering back the entire glass of hard liquor in one go.

“Oh… well thank you. Really. You don’t know how much this-“ But she cut me short.

“Kid… how much do you read my magazines?” she asked. I sighed and answered honestly.

“Not much I’m afraid. I got one from a friend during a… scene, if you will.” I chuckled as I closed my eyes and remembered Cheerilee and I while we masturbated together, or as she put it ‘Masturbating Partner’, or MP for short.

“Oh… well what was the scene like? Hot and sexy? Sweaty? Slimy? Cum infested?” she asked, almost as if she was horny and out of control.

“Meh… not really. We just masturbated together. She calls it a Masturbating Partner,” I informed her but she frowned.

“Come on, give me details! Did yah wait till your peak then jam it in her, blow your load inside her welcoming cooch? Fill her right up? Or did you blow your load all over her belly, smear her fur with your jizz? Or did you slam your cock down her mouth and unload into her throat?” she asked, wildly horny… or maybe she was just always like this…

“Uhm… no, we… really just masturbated together. That’s what an MP is, somepony you can masturbate with, without the fear of sexual contact,” I stated, trying to remember how Cheerilee put it. Hue frowned.

“What faggot thought that up?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“A good friend of mine,” I stated and she raised an eyebrow.

“Was it a guy?”

“WHAT?! NO!” I gasped but still she remained suspicious.

“Prove it,” she challenged and now it was I who raised an eyebrow.

“How?” I asked and she rolled her eyes.

“Tell me how it was when you held her down, thrust into her ass and went bareback before slapping her flank and making a cum dumpster out of her asshole.” Some of the terms she had were just…

“We didn’t have sex. We just masturbated together,” I informed her but still she wasn’t satisfied.

“Good goddess… what are you, gay?” she asked and I leaned my head back in shock.

“Uh… no!” I stated, almost as if it was she who was gay for suggesting that I would have sex with Cheerilee.

“Well then… why didn’t you fuck her? If you’re masturbating together then you’re obviously both horny, so you could have just stuck it in her,” she replied and I sighed.

“Because that’s what an MP is about. Somepony you feel comfortable masturbating around who isn’t going to try and rut you,” I stated. It sounded so much stupider when it wasn't Cheerilee saying it. Hue was about to make another vague interruption before she thought of something and clapped her hooves.

“This is brilliant! I’ll call it… Passions of friendship. Where friends can get messy together but not have sex… it’s brilliant. Goddess, my boy, you’re brilliant!” she announced and I merely nodded.

“Uhm… you’re… welcome?” I replied, not sure what exactly she had in mind. I really hope she didn’t go writing about Cheerilee and I in the next magazine… then again, I had never given away Cheerilee’s name so…

I decided to voice my mind. “Hey uhm… Hue? if you don’t mind, can you not put my name in your magazine? I don’t think my mom would like it,” I asked and she nodded.

“Of course my boy!” she cheered happily as she poured herself more liquor. Before I could even thank her, she offered me the drink.

“No thanks, I don’t drink,” I replied, grateful for her offer but not one to partake.

“Square,” she shot back before swallowing all the contents. “Well kid, anytime you’re feeling a little antsy, just give me a call and I’m sure I can set you up with a playmate,” she told me.

‘Wow! For most any other stallion, that’d be a dream come true. But for me that’s not what I go looking for. That’s a whole lotta trust she’s giving for someone she just met,’ I thought silently. “Well… thank you, really, but I’m not really looking for those sorts of things right now,” I informed her. She looked at me with a shocked expression before downing the bottle’s remains. After smacking her lips a few times in satisfaction, she finally gave me a frown.

“Seriously, are you gay?” she asked but I shook my head.

“No, but thank you for the offer. I’m sure any stallion would sell their only foal for a chance to be with one of your mares,” I commented, but she just laughed.

“Ah, no my boy, I meant me,” she stated and my face went pale. “What?” she asked, getting a little more serious. “You didn’t think I’d let you go rutting my ponies before I had a taste of you, did you? I need to know what’s touching my merchandise.” She smiled with a wink.

“I uhm… uhh…” I just stammered, baffled. She was one crazy cow.

“What? You think just ‘cause I’m old that I’m not a good fuck? Kid, with age comes experience. I could ride you better than you’d ever dream,” she told me and I merely blinked. “Don’t believe me?” she asked.

I began to stutter. I had no idea how to respond to this. This just escalated without warning. “Well uhm… ah-heh heh…” I trailed off with a nervous chuckle.

“Come here, I’ll show you a thrill that you’ll never forget.” She motioned with her hooves for me to come over while spreading her legs wide, displaying her glistening cunt for me to rut.

“UH! I uh… uhm… well, that is to say… I well…” I kept stuttering, completely thrown for a loop.

“Well… come on kid, sh-how me what yah... you’ve got!” Her voice slurred a little, the telltale sign that she was hammered. The fact that she was drunk eased my tensions a little. I had no idea what I would’ve thought if she was sober.

“Well... uhm. Thank you for the offer, but I must decline. I have some business to take care of.” I tipped my cowboy hat and made for my exit.

“No-no! Wait. I know you don’t believe me! I have to show you,” she explained, but I shook my head quickly.

“No, really, I believe you,” I replied back, but she stood up.

“No you don’t! I see it in your eyes. Now since you’re queer!... I’ll have to get somepony else who’s straight to show you,” she stated and I merely groaned. I didn’t need this.

“Julio, come her!” she ordered, and the laborer quickly hustled over.

“Yes Ms. Heifer?” he asked in a thick Mareixican accent.

“Sit down,” she ordered him and he quickly obliged. She sat on his lap and an erection quickly shot into view. “How long do you last during sex?” she asked and he nervously replied.

“I… I do not know Ms. Heifer. I am still virgin,” he stated in a very squeaky and timid voice. Hue just rolled her eyes and slid his cock into her waiting pussy. I saw Julio start to shiver and shake as Hue rode him like a bull. His hindlegs kicked and jerked as he endured an extreme pleasure to which he had never known before. She placed her front hooves on his shoulders and started pounding her hips down on his lap. "Oh Ms. Heifer... oh this feel so good," he moaned in basic English.

Hue began to let out pleasured moans as his cock thrust into her several times at an increasingly faster rate. "Oh god Julio... you cock is so thick... fill me you stud!" Hue moaned and Julio simply countinued to thrust, his hindlegs still jerking in pleasure.

He grunted as his own hooves slid down to her lustful hips, and he started to thrusting harder into her wet, sloppy cunt.

His cock slid up along the insides of her bovine snooch with a smooth film of her juices lubricating his shaft. “Oh… Ms. Heifer… oh… I am about to cum!” But before anything else happened, she quickly stood up and got off him, his shaft now twitching in need of release.

“Okay, y-‘ve served yer purpose. Now go on. Go jerk it off somewhere else,” Hue slurred, heavily intoxicated. Julio looked to her in disbelief… huh, talk about blue-balls. She flicked her wrist in motion for him to leave. “Go on, I wanna muh seat back-k!” she announced and Julio quickly got up and left.

“An’ don’ jerk off in the bushes! I jus’ had them trimmed!” she shouted drunkenly. Her drunken speech reminded me of my real mother… well, maybe not the explicit sexual vulgarity, but…

“Now see? You coulda been fuckin’ me… like that!” she reasoned, her head swaying side to side as she pointed at Julio.

“Uhm… yeah… I wouldn’t feel like getting blue-balled like that,” I replied and she just rolled her eyes.

“You crazy?! I didn’ want him makin’ babies inside me! But I woulda let you... cum all inside me…” She slurred off, trailing her right hoof up her slit, the slowly up her stomach. I blinked as she looked to me with serious wide eyes, not blinking even once.

“Uhm… are you okay?” I asked, but she didn’t reply. Instead, she just kept looking at me. I slowly waved my hand but, as I did, she slouched over and fell to the ground in a drunken heap, now passed out.

I blinked… wondering if perhaps she had just kicked the bucket. Heavy snoring quickly made itself known and I merely rolled my eyes. Poor thing…

I looked to Julio, who was jerking off feverishly in the corner of the backyard. I just chuckled before making my way to the front yard and down the streets. Taking out the digital map, I searched for Uptown…

Author's Note

The pegasi hammered me to the ground with brutal force. I groaned in slight pain as a dust cloud surrounded us. I felt her body shivering on top of mine, hooves covering her eyes. As the dust cleared I creaked open my right eye. "Derpy... what are you doing here?"

There's a little tid bit from the next chapter (Kinda like a spoiler but not really... like a teaser almost...) What is your thoughts on it? Should I do it more often or not at all? I'm open to suggestions since there is usually a long wait time between chapters

Chapter 24

‘Killing is in my nature bud…’

Ponyville Library,

Twilight’s perspective…

I groaned as I flopped my hoof over the top of my muzzle, effectively covering my eyes while I groaned. “And he didn’t say where he was going?” I asked, to which Spike shook his head.

It wasn’t the first time Evan had just up and left without a word and hadn’t come back that same night. But it was the first time he left that Lassie started to act strange… really strange.

Lassie didn’t really want to be inside and constantly whimpered while scratching at the door. Spike had said that Evan was going somewhere, but he wasn’t sure where. He had also informed me that Evan had received a letter, but from whom he didn’t know. Added to the fact that Evan had taken the letter, I had no place to start effectively searching for him.

Lassie whined and scratched at the door feverishly. “Lassie, I’m sure it’s nothing. He’ll be back, I know it,” I promised the faithful pooch, but my words of comfort didn’t serve any comfort. She lept up onto a desk near the window then pushed it open with her nose before squirming through the small space.

Immediately Lassie raced over to where Evan’s truck was always parked and began whining excessively, almost as if she was crying. I sighed sadly as I closed the window then proceeded outside, making my way towars the whimpering puppy... actually, she was growing a lot lately. She really couldn't be considered a puppy anymore due to her size.

I made my way to her and sat beside the dog who now had tears trickling down into her fur as she shuddered, heaving in deep breaths. I gently wrapped my left foreleg around her, bringing her into a loving hug. “You were there for me, now I’ll be here for you,” I assured the canine, remembering how she coached during dinner with Evan.

I could feel Lassie’s heart beating heavily as she took deep and shaky breaths, her body still shuddering as she cried. I had no idea what was wrong… I mean, Evan got into rough patches, but… surely he wouldn’t be dead. He couldn’t be, he just… he just can’t die.

* * *

Manehattan,

Evan’s perspective…

I casually strolled down the streets of Manehattan, making sure to stay away from darker alleyways or bad slums. I kept the safety latch on Belladonna’s holster unbuttoned to allow a quicker draw if needed.

I didn’t have any money for a taxi, which would’ve made this easier. However, despite not having a clue where anything was, the digital map made finding Uptown rather easy.

I strolled uphill but, as I did, an undeniable voice caught my attention from above. “HELP!” Screamed the voice as its bearer plummeted downwards. I looked up and caught glance of a grey pony in mailpony fatigues.

A small smirk crossed my face as I spread my stance and widened my arms. Derpy wasn’t looking and had her forelegs covering her eyes as she careened downwards.

As her body collided with mine I winced, partially in brief pain, but also due to the fact that her body’s momentum smashed me into the ground with a brutal force that I couldn’t counter.

I felt her body shivering on top of mine. “You know Derpy… we should… really stop meeting… like this,” I wheezed between breaths, followed by a brief chuckle. I cracked open my right eye and took a peek at her.

Derpy stopped breathing for a moment and looked up before her eyes went wide. “EVAN! Are you okay?!” she gasped worriedly and I simply nodded.

“I’ve felt better, but… I’m doing pretty good. Yourself? What brings you to Manehattan?” I asked, still lying with her atop of me.

“Oh, I had a delivery to make. But on my way back I got pulled into turbulence. Thanks for saving me... again!” she thanked me happily while smiling brightly.

I winced slightly as my body began to feel the pain of the impact, but like I said, it wasn’t too-too bad. “Yeah, no problem Derpy. You know that I’d do anything for a good friend like you,” I told her with a wink.

She got off me and stood up, brushing off her uniform before scratching her ear. “Well… what brings you to Manehattan?” she asked in her usual dopey-yet-adorable voice.

“Oh…” I trailed off, not really wanting to explain the real reason I was here. Instead, I told her a very shortened version of the truth. “I’m also delivering something,” I informed her and her face spread into another smile.

“Do yah need some help! I can lead you anywhere. I’m a great guide!” she informed me. I shrugged. I didn’t see why that was the worst idea. If she just led me to the Liotta homestead, then we could go our separate ways from there.

“Sure. I’m going to this ritzy neighborhood in Uptown,” I informed her and she nodded before turning and pointing towards the slums.

“I know exactly where that is. It’s that way. Come on, I can show you!” she announced, beginning to lead towards where I had come from. My brow furrowed as I looked to my GPS thingy. That was in the complete opposite direction to where I was going.

“Uhm… Derpy, are you sure? I think Uptown is that way,” I informed her, pointing to the direction I was supposed to be travelling. She blinked, her crossed eyes looking towards Uptown with an undaunting gaze.

She looked to the sky and started pointing with her left hoof while counting to herself. I wasn’t exactly sure what she was doing. Without warning, she stood to her hindlegs and began slowly stepping in circles, still looking at the sky and counting, this time with both forelegs pointing at the sky.

She quickly settled down to all fours, her eyes twirling around in a bizarre way as she wobbled while her balance resettled. I blinked and Derpy suddenly shook her head. “OH YEAH! Uptown is that way!” she announced, pointing in the proper direction.

I looked over my shoulder towards Uptown, then back to my ditzy friend. “Uhm… yeah,” I replied unsurely, wondering to myself if this was actually a good idea or not. Derpy began to trot towards my destination.

“Come on! I’ll show you where you’re going!” she offered, still trotting in a rather bubbly way. I just rolled my eyes and followed her. I suppose nothing really bad could come from this, as long as we parted ways before I met with the family’s Don.

As we trotted through the city, Derpy constantly pointed out several attractions that the city offered: street vendors, corner stores, and the like. I was rather surprised that she knew so much, but it quickly donned upon me that she was a mailpony and that she probably got around quite a bit.

Before I knew it, and much to my utter surprise, Derpy stopped and presented to me a small neighbourhood… well actually, it was like Hue Heifer stated. It was a large gated laneway that had four big houses… mansions actually, that were sealed off from the public by a fancy brick wall that surrounded the rather large property. There were several stallions dressed in three piece suits at the gate, along with several posted along the laneway.

The dwellings were not separated by any type of fence or otherwise, and had a rather large distance between them… well, for a city home in a sprawling metropolis. Finely cut grass lawns stood in front of each home, along with a fancy… very fancy, motorized carriages. Each carriage looked kinda like on old ‘30’s Rolls Royce Sedanca de Ville, minus a few tid bits. The wheels were all wooden carriage wheels that were a little bit thicker than the regular carriages that I’ve seen. On top of that, the spare wheel was actually on the back, rather than behind the front fender. And the storage box unit was on the front side of the vehicle, where the spare wheel would’ve been located.

However, despite these discrepancies, every vehicle looked expensive. Added to the fact that they were all black, it looked like a real time ‘30’s mobster neighbourhood.

Trees littered the property and gave the scene a rather beautiful look for a city dwelling. “Well… thanks Derpy, be good,” I told her. She smiled as I walked away and towards the front gate.

The two guards, or henchponies, or whatever the hell they were, stopped me abruptly before I could get too close. “HAULT! State your business!” one of the stallions ordered.

“Flim and Flam sent me with this,” I stated, lifting away my duster coat flap and revealing the goo canister.

“Who’s she?” the other asked, pointing behind me in an inquiring way. I turned, only to see Derpy standing behind me with a rather curious look. I let out a silent groan; I had this feeling that Derpy wanted to know what was going on… or she wanted to help me in some way or another.

“Uhm… she’s my guide.” I turned back to the two guards, who looked to Derpy then back to me. The one on the left stepped back then spoke into an intercom placed on the brick wall just beside the gate.

“Uhm… there’s a… hairless ape with a mailpony here. Said they was sent from Flim and Flam. He has some canister,” the stallion spoke with a Sicilian accent.

Derpy tugged on my coat flap. I leaned over and she whispered into my ear. “These guys look scary,” Derpy whispered fearfully and I nodded.

I gave her a waving notion with my hand to not get too worried about it. “I know,” I whispered back. The second stallion took notice of our whispering and loosened his tuxedo, the bulge of what looked like the handle a hoof bow protruded from the left side of his tux. These guys were packing some serious hardware no doubt, and I’d need to play it cautious.

“Yeah, okay, I’ll send him in,” the stallion on the intercom replied, finishing up his conversation. He turned back to me. “You!” He pointed at me. “Go up the laneway and to the last house. Ask for Don Leone… and for fuck’s sake be respectful!” he swore aggressively and pressed a button located below the intercom.

The gate slid sideways and into a slot in the brick wall. ‘Damn… nice place,’ I thought silently. I gave them both an appreciative nod and, with a tip of my hat, I made my way forwards.

Derpy went to follow but they quickly stopped her. “Not you. You wait here,” ordered one of the guards. Derpy looked to me and I sighed.

“I’ll be right back Derpy. I promise,” I assured her. I felt bad for leaving her, but there was nothing else I could do. I turned and continued upwards, all the guards on the property giving me stares. A shiver went down my back, but it wasn’t one meant to alert me to danger, just an uneasy tension.

I reached the last house, which had a guard posted at the main door. He stopped me before I could enter. “Hey buddy, hand over your hardware,” he commanded me. I slowly reached into my coat and handed over the canister of goo.

He looked at it then back to me. “No, not that. Any weapons,” he ordered but I shook my head.

“Oh… sorry. I don’t have any,” I lied, but he raised a suspicious eyebrow.

“You’re not serious? Are you?” he asked and I nodded. “Who the hell trots around Manehattan without a piece?” he asked and I shrugged. He stepped forwards and up to his hindlegs to pat me down.

Within seconds he found Belladonna. “What the hell is this?” he asked, grabbing at Belladonna.

“Pocket pussy. I keep it handy,” I replied and his lip curled in disgust as he yanked his hoof away, shaking it furiously as he tried to rid himself of any sexual fluids he may now have on him.

“Ech… gross… what kind of sick fuck are you?” he asked and I just rolled my eyes.

“The kind that has debilitating urges,” I stated and he shook his head, trying to get images out of his mind.

“That’s repulsive. Just get in there and be respectful to the Don,” he opened the door, now not wanting anything to do with me. I stepped in and made myself graceful.

This place was top notch, no questions asked. There were hanging chandeliers, framed portraits of the city, and a few of a stallion, whom I presumed to be this ‘Don’ fellow and… it was just really classy in here.

“Hey!” called a voice from in another room. I turned and looked over. In a room filled with shelves of books sat a finely groomed stallion in a furnished chair. The stallion looked a little older, late fifties, and was dressed in fine noir attire.

I made my way over and bowed, removing my hat in the process. “Don’t act like a fuckin’ China-mare!” he spat and I quickly repositioned myself.

“Sorry sir!” I quickly apologized and he just rolled his eyes as he stuck a marker in the story he was reading. Setting the story aside, he gave me a once over.

“So… you come out here… to the Liotta homestead, to meet Don Leone of all ponies… dressed like a shitkickin’ fuckin' hayseed,” he mused and I gulped. This was going downhill, and fast.

“Sorry,” I apologized again.

“You got guts kid, a whole lotta guts,” he muttered just as he licked his lips. “So… you got that stuff?” he asked and I nodded. “So why the hell didn’t you give it to my stallion at the docks this mornin’?” he asked.

“I was attacked,” I replied honestly.

“The Gravelli’s?” he asked quickly and with wide eyes.

“I don’t think so,” I replied. I somehow doubted that the woman who attacked me would be working with the mob. It was possible… but unlikely.

“Then who?” Leone asked and I shrugged.

“Dunno, but she almost killed me and that’s why I couldn’t make it. I apologize for being tardy,” I replied and he groaned.

“Oh for Celestia’s sake, don’t talk like a Brit. Just apologize like a normal pony… or whatever the hell you are,” he insisted. I nodded. “Okay… kid, I’m gonna be blunt. You’re fuckin’ stupid for bringin’ that shit here. The Gravelli’s undoubtedly know that you’re the one who has that… and by you bringing that here, they know that you’re gonna give it to us,” he stated and I felt my stomach sink.

“I’m sorry sir. I didn’t know where else to go. I don’t exactly know many ponies in this town, or any of your associates,” I apologized and he nodded.

“True that… but now we're stuck with this problem. The Gravelli’s are stupid… but not stupid enough to attack us on our home front. They’ll wait until we try to move that stuff to the market to attack us…” He trailed off in thought.

“A diversion?” I offered and he nodded.

“Yeah… but what exactly?” he asked and I thought for a brief moment before coming up with a plan.

“Okay, the vial is in a canister to protect it. So I take the vial out, and in plain sight, hand off the empty canister to one of your guys. Then I make my way to some meeting point while your guy leads them in the opposite direction,” I offered. He raised an eyebrow.

“You know kid… for a shitkickin’ hayseed… you’re not all dumb,” he appraised me and I smiled.

“Thank you sir. It means a lot,” I replied. He reached over to a small intercom on the desk and began speaking to a stallion on the other end, probably one of the guards from the front gate. I began to let my gaze wander across the beautiful room. It had wonderful Italian architect designs.

As he quickly wrapped up his conversation, he turned his attention back to me. “Alright, so here’s the deal,” he began. “You’re gonna go outside and give the canister to one of my guards at the gate. Then make your way down to Mickey’s. It’s a shitty motel, but I know the owner. Just tell him Don Leone sent you and you won’t have to pay. Like I said, it's a shitty place, but you’ll be under the radar. Stay there until midnight then make your way over to Central Park. Go to the underground washrooms and my guy will be there to do the real pickup. And from there, you’ll have held up your end of the bargain.” He smiled and gave me a nod. “You know kid, my family could use an associate like you,” he offered, well… I think he offered.

“Thank you sir, but I must decline. I’m not really one to do this line of work, but I do appreciate the offer,” I replied and he just shrugged.

“Well the offer stands.” He motioned for the door and I nodded. I removed the green nutrient vial from the canister just before leaving. Making my way out the door, the guard at the door stepped out of my way, not wanting to be anywhere near me.

I moseyed down to the front gate where Derpy was waiting. I walked up to the stallion waiting for me and slowly offered him the canister. He took it then began to walk down the street.

“What was that?” Derpy asked wonderingly.

“Don’t worry about it Derpy,” I replied, not wanting her to get into this affair. She gave me an inquiring look, obviously not thrilled with the fact that I was holding information from her. “Can you show me where Mickey’s motel is?” I asked her and she nodded with a little bit of irritation. Maybe I shouldn’t have asked her to show me and just used the GPS... but I guess I didn’t want to just ditch her like that.

* * *

Third person…

It was getting late. Street lamps flickered and illuminated the streets. The, city ambiance was somewhat silent compared to it's usual tone, but even still, it was not enough to allow one to sleep peacefully. Prostitutes sold themselves on street corners while drug dealers did their own business with others in dark alleys.

A lone stallion rushed through the streets in a rather inconspicuous way.

The Liotta henchpony quickly trotted down the streets of Manehattan on his way to a safehouse. He took a corner rather quickly before dipping into an alley. He made his movements quick and spiffy, trying to get to his destination as quickly as possible. He knew that Gravelli associates would most undoubtedly be watching him, even at this very second.

He took a sharp corner in the alleyway but, just as he did, a bat smacked him in the snout, knocking him onto his flank. He winced in shock and surprise as the blunt pain from his nose trauma struck him hard.

Blood trickled down his nose and from his lips, tainting his mouth with its metallic taste. “ARGH!” he groaned just as a hoof kicked him in the gut. A hoof reached down and grabbed the canister from the inside of his suit jacket.

Opening it up, the stallion realized that there were no contents. “Where is it?” he asked, but the Liotta henchpony simply spat blood at him.

“Fuck you,” he hissed. The leader of the group nodded. Several stallions grabbed the Liotta stallion and pinned him to the wall as the bat was once again swung, this time into his left hindleg’s knee.

He screamed in torment as his knee was shattered. “GAH! FUCK YOU!” he screamed, and the bat was again swung, this time into the other knee with similar results. He whined and grimaced in absolute throbbing pain as the aggressor with the bat lifted the stallion’s chin with the tip of the weapon.

“Where is the stuff?” he asked rather calmly.

“Up your mother’s cunt,” the Liotta stallion replied snidely before spitting blood into the other’s face. The stallion with the bat cocked back for a swing, but rather simply slammed the butt of the handle into the Liotta stallion’s face, smashing several of his white teeth.

Blood spurted from his mouth as his body was dropped to the ground in a heap. Shards of white teeth were spat out of the stallion’s mouth as he was again kicked in the gut, resulting in a gagging reaction.

The stallion caressed his mouth in an attempt to ease the excruciating pain. “Feel like talking?” the attacker asked, but the stallion still refused, simply shaking his head.

The pony with the bat set aside his weapon as he knelt atop the brutalized pony. “Hey Vince, pass me that rusty 'ol razor you have,” he ordered and the Liotta stallion’s eyes went wide.

One of the stallions in the group passed the leader a rusty, old, straight razor. “Wha are yuh guh-a do?” the beat up stallion asked, barely able to piece together words due to his smashed mouth.

“I’m gonna cut off your boys, seeing as how you don’t like talking,” the leader replied darkly as he flipped open the razor knife.

“NO WAI!” The stallion barely managed, motioning from him to stop.

“Couldn’t make that out, what were you saying?” the leader asked mockingly as he moved to cut off the stallion’s testicles.

“WAI, I AWCK! AH’LL AWCK!” He tried painfully to piece together words.

“Still can’t understand you,” the leader taunted as he cut open the stallion’s suit pants, the blade constantly cutting deep into the stallion’s thighs, and around his private area.

“ARRG! Cen-al par-awk!” the stallion bellowed and the other stallion with the knife stopped.

“Go on, I’m listening,” he offered.

“To-ight… mi-ight… aww… wa-room… in cen-al pa-awk.” The Liotta stallion finally broke down. The stallion with the knife smiled.

“Very good,” he replied before reaching into his coat and pulling out some serious hardware. The leader gripped the handle on his hoof bow which was specially designed for hooves. The Liotta stallion saw the leader pulling out his hoof bow and his eyes went wide. The sides of the gun flipped out into crossbow limbs as the weapon chambered the first bolt.

“WAI!” the Liotta stallion screamed for mercy, but it was the last thing he did…

* * *

Evan’s perspective…

So we got a little lost and ended up traversing down a bunch of streets in downtown Manehattan. We began down an alley but Derpy suddenly stopped. “Derpy?” I asked and she gave me an inquiring look.

“What was that you gave him?” she asked, still not dropping it.

I let out a sigh. “If I tell you… you can’t tell anypony, okay?” I asked and she nodded before swivelling around.

“Tail Twist Swear,” she replied, wiggling her flank a little. I nodded, turned around and bumped flanks with her.

“Tail Twist Swear,” I repeated. We turned around and I began to give her the short yet fulfilling and truthful story. “Okay. That canister used to have some stuff in it that those ponies wanted, but other ponies want it too so they’ll fight over it. So I kept the stuff that was inside of it and just gave him an empty canister so that he could be a diversion. So I’m supposed to meet this other stallion… or maybe it’s the same one, I don’t know. And I’m supposed to give him the real stuff tonight,” I informed her.

“And what is the stuff?” she asked, delving deeper into the topic. I took a deep breath. I didn’t really want to go into it, but I promised.

“A nutrient substance,” I replied and her eyes went even more wonky than usual.

“So why do they want it so badly?” she asked, going even deeper.

“Because…” I trailed off and decided to be completely honest with her. “They stole it from them. And those guys stole it from some other ponies. So now I’m trying to get it to them,” I replied and her mouth went agape.

“YOU STOLE IT!” she gasped and I quickly corrected her.

“No! I didn’t steal it. Somepony else did. They just wanted me to deliver it,” I told her, but her shocked look remained.

“Why would you do that?! That’s bad!” she gasped and I groaned. This is exactly why I didn’t want her knowing.

“Derpy I... A friend asked me to, and a friend helps a friend,” I stated.

“But stealing is really bad, and you shouldn’t be a part of it. Maybe you shouldn’t be friends with those ponies,” she suggested and I sighed.

“Remember Flim and Flam? The ponies in the desert who helped me save Ponyville even though they didn’t want to?” I asked and she nodded. “Those are the ponies that asked me… so I kind of owe them, you know?” I stated. She went to counter but got choked up on words.

“I… I can’t believe… you’d do something like this,” she stammered, shocked that I would do this kind of work.

“Derpy… there are some things about me that even I don’t like. But friends help friends, no matter what,” I told her.

“But there has to be a limit,” she replied and I looked to the ground in despair. I can’t believe this was happening.

“Derpy. I swear that I don’t like doing this but… I… I just…” I trailed off and Derpy just stood there, wide eyed and shocked. ‘GODDAMMIT! FUCK I HATE THIS!’ I swore at myself silently.

“Are you gonna do it again?” she asked and I let out a deep breath.

“I don’t know Derpy. It just… Flim and Flam help me in ways that they don’t like when I ask, so… I help them in ways I don’t like when they ask,” I replied. She blinked, shocked greatly from what she was hearing.

“I just… I just don’t know what to think. I didn’t think you were like this,” she stammered and I gulped.

“I’m not, Derpy,” I told her, but she shook her head.

“But you are. You’re doing it right now,” she countered. Both of my hands grasped my head as I thought furiously. I didn’t want her to think I was some sort of criminal… but maybe I was. My heart sank even further.

Derpy continued to step back while I was thinking furiously to myself. Suddenly a scream echoed in the alleyway and I immediately looked up. A poorly dressed stallion held Derpy up on her hindlegs, a nasty old knife held dangerously close to her throat.

“Alright buddy, no horseshit! Just give me everything you’ve got!” the mugger ordered. ‘Oh great! Another goddamn mugger! DO I NOT HAVE ENOUGH FUCKING THINGS GOING ON?!’ I thought angrily to myself.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t have anything,” I pleaded. He shook his head, still holding my petrified friend in his grip.

“Bullshit! I just heard you talking about that stuff… the nutrient stuff that those other ponies want! Give it to me and I’ll let your friend live!” he hissed, pulling her tighter to him. “But if not!” He tugged the knife tight to her throat and my eyes went wide in anger.

‘Big mistake!’ my conscience thought. “Listen… buddy… just let her go, or else!” I warned in a deep voice and he simply scoffed.

“Wrong answer! Don’t fuck with me, I’ll kill her! I swear I will!” he spat. My shooting hand dangled down to my side.

“Derpy… I’m about to do something really bad. Close your eyes and be very still, okay?” I pleaded.

“Hey buddy, shut the fuck up and give me the stuff!” the stallion ordered. Derpy closed her eyes and stiffened. I began to recite a rather vulgar nursery rhyme. My left hand steadied in front of my face as my right hand etched towards my hand cannon.

“Jack and Jill went up the hill,
So Jack could like her fanny,
But Jack got a shock,
And a mouth full of cock,
Cause Jill’s real name is Danny.”

The mugger took a moment to think, the knife moving slightly away from Derpy’s neck as his head peaked out to the side. “Wha…” He trailed off and stifled a laugh. Time seemed to slow down significantly as my right arm made a seemingly single fluid motion.

My right trigger finger stayed extended while the rest of my hand gripped the handle of Belladonna and pulled her from her domain. In a brief moment, my handgun’s sights lined up with the baddy’s head. My left hand shot forward with great speed and took the gun into a two hand grip as my trigger finger slipped into the guard and brushed against the trigger.

His eyes didn’t even have time to go wide as I squeezed back. The mighty pistol rocked in my hands, a brilliant flash of light illuminating the dark alleyway as a bullet sped into the stallion’s skull at supersonic speeds.

The complete right side of the mugger’s head splattered into a mist of blood and skull fragments. His body was pulled back, along with Derpy’s who was still in his grip. Smoke emulated from the barrel of my hand cannon as I stood motionless, still in my two hand shooting stance. I depressed the hammer of my pistol, spun it on my finger, then blew out the smoke before quickly holstering her.

I stepped over, looking down upon the mess. Most of the stallion’s face was missing… and blood littered the area along with brain particles. Derpy went to get up but I stopped her. “Derpy, whatever you do, don’t open your eyes,” I warned her, picking her up and wiping her face with a flap of my duster coat.

I quickly rushed her out onto the street, several ponies looking at Derpy and me. We began to rush down the sidewalk and to Mickey’s Motel. “What happened? Can I open my eyes now?” she asked.

“Yeah, you can open your eyes. Just don’t scream,” I told her. She opened her eyes and saw the vast amount of blood that stained her fur and uniform. She took a deep breath, her eyes going wide as she went to scream, but never managed as my hand covered her mouth. “Derpy, sssh!” I ushered her down another street and finally to Mickey’s Motel.

I rushed in with Derpy and the recipient at the desk looked to us in shock, but quickly settled. “Oh! You must be the ones Leone sent. The hairless ape and the mailpony, right? Sheesh! What happened to her?” he asked, shocked from all the blood.

“Mugger,” I replied subtly.

“IS SHE GOING TO BE ALRIGHT?!” he gasped and I nodded.

“Not her blood, the mugger’s. We need a room, one with a shower,” I told him. He nodded and passed me a set of keys. I gave him a nod and rushed Derpy to the room. Locking the door behind us, I let out a deep exhale, which was followed by a high pitched scream from Derpy.

I cringed as she screamed even louder. “THIS IS BLOOD! OH MY GODDESS! I’M COVERED IN SOMEPONY’S BLOOD!” she cried out and I settled a little.

“Derpy, just calm down, I-“ I began but she quickly cut me off.

“JUST CALM DOWN! HOW CAN I BE CALM?! THERE’S SOMEPONY’S BLOOD ON ME!” She continued to scream.

“Derpy, please just quiet down and-“ But Derpy again cut me off.

“Oh… oh my goddess… you killed him… you killed him didn’t you?!” she asked hysterically.

“Yes,” I replied honestly.

“Oh my goddess… you’re a murderer!” she cried and my heart sank. ‘Great! My best friend thinks I’m a murderer because I saved her life!’ my conscience spat.

“No Derpy I… I didn’t murder him. He was going to kill you,” I replied but she shook her head as she cautiously stepped away from me.

“But you… you murdered him. He’s dead… and his blood is all over me,” she countered. My heart began to race; I couldn’t lose my best friend.

“Derpy… there’s a line between murder and self-defence,” I informed her, but she wouldn’t take any of it.

“But… but you… he’s dead. Don’t you feel bad?” she asked and I gave her the most honest answer.

“No. I don’t feel bad for killing him. He was going to hurt you if I didn’t,” I replied but again she countered.

“No. Not if you had given him that stuff!” she replied.

“I couldn’t do that! Then we’d be in even more trouble,” I told her but she started to break down and cry.

“But you killed him. He’s dead! Don’t you even feel a little bad?” she asked. I felt bad, but not in the way she was asking. I flopped down to my knees in despair.

“Derpy… it was the only thing I could think of… I know… it was pretty bad, but-“ She cut me off.

“But you… he’s… dead,” she whispered and I nodded.

“I know. But Derpy, I love you, and I wouldn’t let anything happen to you. If I had given him the stuff he wanted, then the Liotta’s would’ve come after us. And if I didn’t… then he’d have killed you,” I told her and she gulped.

I pulled Belladonna from her holster, ejected the magazine then racked back the slide, removing the live shell from the chamber. “There’s a reason these aren’t in your world…” I trailed off and thought about the few things I had learned about this world that made it imperfect. “Well, from what I can tell anyway. Back on my world… these were used to kill,” I informed her and her eyes went wide.

“Did you ever kill?” she asked and I nodded. “Ponies like you?” she asked but I shook my head.

“No. None of my kind ever gave me an appropriate chance. Derpy… I don’t kill just because I feel like it. I’ll only kill if it’s necessary… and believe me, it needed to be done,” I told her but she couldn’t handle it.

“I can’t… I can’t believe it. Ponies shouldn’t need to kill other ponies.” She began to weep and I took her into a hug. I felt her shuddering against me as she cried, still traumatized by this event.

Now I was really wishing she didn’t come along. “Derpy… I love you. That’s why I killed,” I told her. In thought, I realized this was the first pony I had ever killed. Truthfully, most people say killing others is a difficult thing… maybe this is why. Not that you feel bad for doing it, but because others viewed you differently afterwards.

“Do you forgive me?” I asked, holding her in a gentle hug. There was a long silent pause that seemed to drag on forever. My heart sank and it was as if it wasn't beating.

“Yes,” she whispered softly.

I exhaled in relief, not realizing that I had been holding my breath. “Do you still think I’m a murderer?” I asked hesitantly, praying that she didn’t view me as such.

She didn’t say anything, she just shook her head against my chest. “Tail Twist Swear?” I asked and she nodded.

“I just wish that nopony had to die,” she whimpered. I nodded.

“So do I Derpy… so do I,” I said softly.

“I think… I think…” she whispered. I leaned back to look at her. “I think I need a bath,” she whimpered while shuddering. I nodded and helped her to her hooves. Walking over to the low quality washroom, I left her to her privacy.

“Can you… help me? I’ve never washed somepony else’s blood off before,” she asked me, still in a very timid and traumatized voice.

I nodded and walked into the washroom with her. I started running the bathtub, which was a shower bathtub combination. I filled the tub with rather warm water. I looked to the soap, which looked pretty nasty, but it was all we had.

Looking to Derpy, I saw that she had removed her mailpony uniform and was looking at herself in the mirror, disturbed by the sight that presented itself. My eyes shut as I let out an emotionally pained sigh. I didn't want her to go through this... nopony should have to go through this. Blood stained her fur and made my heart sink further. “Derpy,” I whispered, catching her attention.

“I’m so sorry. From the bottom of my heart… I swear that I wouldn’t have done it unless it was absolutely necessary.” She swallowed and nodded. I let out an exhale, a lone tear dribbled from my eye.

Derpy slowly trotted over and stepped into the tub. I grabbed one of the old cloths from a rack and dampened it in the tub water. Very gently, I began to scrub her down. She whispered something, so faintly that I could barely hear it.

“What?” I asked as I continued to wash the blood from her.

“You’re… you’re still my best friend. You did what… needed to be done,” she said to me, loud enough so that I could hear. My heart rested easy for the moment. “But…” She trailed off. “If that’s what needs to be done, then… then I can’t go with you anymore. We can still be friends afterwards, but… I can’t do this,” she informed me, on the verge of bawling.

“Derpy… you… do you think differently of me? In a bad way?” I asked but she shook her head silently.

“No. I know you’re not a bad pony, you never were… but I never thought that you would kill a pony,” she replied. Well… as bad as I felt about it, at least she knew the truth about me. I was a killer, no way around it. I started applying soap to the wash.

I rested a hand over my face as I sighed. Before I could think, a hoof rested on my shoulder. Looking up, I saw Derpy looking to me with soft, gentle eyes. “It’s okay. You did the right thing. You’re still a good pony,” she assured me and I smiled.

“Thanks Derpy,” I thanked her. She looked to me then leaned forwards, planting a kiss on my cheek.

“No. Thank you. For saving me again,” she whispered. I nodded and continued to wash her clean. Her fur was rather smooth and fine. Her light blonde mane was straight and dripping wet… well, I suppose it should be since she was getting washed.

After over an hour of silence, I had washed all the blood from her fur and mane. Derpy stepped out of the bath and shook wildly, water splashing everywhere. My eyes clenched shut as water splashed me in the face.

Creeping open my eyes, I spotted Derpy with a feverish smile on her face. Her smile lifted my spirit just a little. Derpy laughed nervously. “Sorry… it was an accident,” she apologized.

“Don’t worry Derpy. It’s alright.” I knelt down with a towel and quickly dried her off. As I stepped back, I gave her a nod. “Well Derpy… I guess you should be going.”

Without a warning, she lept onto me, squeezing me in a tight hug. “You were always you. You might have killed, but you’re still the stallion… the guy, which I liked to play with. Please don’t change,” she whispered and I nodded, wanting to burst into tears so badly, but I had to stay strong.

“I won’t Derpy, I promise.” We hugged for a little while longer before she let go and broke from the hug. She gave me a nod then left with a smile. I’m not sure if the smile was forced or not, but it left me feeling a little better about myself.

‘Hmm… funny. Most people say it’s hard killing another but it seems harder to live with how others view you,’ my conscience spoke up as the door closed behind Derpy.

“Shut up,” I told the voice as I moved over to the bed and flopped down. The mattress creaked and I noticed several dead cockroaches and cigarette butts on the bed sheets, even several used condoms. “UGH… Gross,” I groaned.

I looked at the pillow. It had nasty chewing tobacco stains and cigarette burns in it. The bed sheets had several stains of which the origin I didn’t want to know. I got up and moseyed over to the couch.

The couch served a little better, only having a few cigarette burns in it. The couch itself reeked of urine and had several stains in it… probably piss stains. I just rolled my eyes and laid down.

I looked to my watch which, despite being submerged in water, still worked like it used to. Though the watch arms were dead like usual, the digital readout read bang on: 9:45pm. I set the alarm for 11:30pm then rested my head on the armrest of the couch.

Just before I could fall asleep, the door opened. I looked up to see who it was, only to see a large bipedal figure in the doorway. “Howdy cowboy,” said a familiar voice.

“Ugh… Derreck,” I replied tiredly as I flopped my head back down against the armrest.

“WHAT?! Are you fuckin’ kidding me? I saved your life not even twenty-four hours ago and that’s all I get? ‘Ugh, Derreck,’” he mused in a playfully annoyed voice.

“Sorry… just really tired right now… and stressed out...” I trailed off as I thought of Derpy. Something about how she now thought differently of me just… it just really got to me.

“Yeah well… I’ll keep watch, you take a nap,” he offered and I raised an eyebrow.

“So why exactly are you here again?” I asked wonderingly.

“What? Is there something wrong with hanging out with a good friend?” he asked but I just shook my head and passed out. ‘Whatever… he can do as he likes,’ I thought while my world went black.

* * *

Manehattan,

Third person…

Derpy strolled down the somewhat empty streets, the recent occurrence still stuck in her mind. She had never been so close to a pony getting killed, let alone being part of the killing.

Though she didn’t think too differently of her close friend, the thought still plagued her mind. Just something about killing made her body shiver.

Nearby, in the shadows of the city, three stallions sat in an older motorized carriage. “Yeah… that’s her alright. Grab her,” the leader of the group ordered. They had been following Derpy since she had left the motel, figuring that perhaps she might have the vial now.

Two of the stallions stepped out of the vehicle and began to trot at a faster pace than Derpy, whom paid them no mind due to her mental struggle. “Excuse me, miss?” asked the first stallion, stalling Derpy in her tracks.

She turned to face them but didn’t even manage a peep as the duo tackled her, tossing a black bag over her head. Her muffled screams didn’t even reach the street corner as the black carriage rolled up beside the group. The two stallions tossed her in the back seat then hopped in, the vehicle departing before the doors even closed…

* * *

Mickey’s Motel,

Evan’s perspective…

I awoke to Derreck nudging me. “Come on, it’s time to go,” he ordered me. I looked to my watch. It was 11:29pm. I rolled my eyes and flicked off the alarm before sitting up, rubbing my eyes.

My head throbbed as my body tried to shake off the dreariness that plagued me. Derreck ushered me up. “Come on, let’s go.” With that I stood up. I grabbed the partially spent magazine for Belladonna and loaded it back into my gun.

I holstered her but still left it unstrapped, just in case. We proceeded out the building and down the streets of Manehattan, making our way to Central Park as quickly as possible.

Nopony bothered us, let alone even made eye contact. Derreck was dressed in brown trousers like mine and a white T-shirt which was a size or two too small, gripping at every curve of his muscular frame. His head was shaven down and he had a blunt, serious look on his face.

We used the GPS to locate Central Park and arrived fairly quickly. Within minutes, we located the underground washroom in the middle of the park and proceeded down the steps and into the stallion washrooms.

The washroom floor was littered with garbage: food wrappers, soda cans, and even more used condoms. “Jeeze… talk about midnight romance,” Derreck muttered jokingly. I just rolled my eyes. “So where is this guy?” he asked and I took a look at my watch. It was just after midnight, but maybe he was running late.

I paced over to a nearby sink and started washing my face. Even the sinks were pretty scuzzy. Derreck moved towards the toilet stalls. “I gotta piss,” he muttered. I was about to say he could use the urinals but I saw that they were all pretty low to the ground, no doubt meant for ponies, not a 6’2” hulking mass of a man like Derreck.

“JESUS FUCK!” Derreck yelped and I turned to see what the problem was. Inside the toilet stall was a stallion, with a hoof bow bolt shot into his forehead, and a letter attached to the bolt.

The letter was written in blood, no doubt his. ‘Liotta scum.’ Derreck stepped back and a shiver went down my back. I turned to see three stallions rushing into the washroom. “DERRECK, LOOK OUT!” I yelled as I moved to intercept them.

As I turned to apprehend them, I slipped on the slick floor and fell to my back. “UGH!” I groaned as my head smacked off the tile flooring. Derreck turned just as the first stallion swung a bat at him.

He ducked the bat and gave a one-two punch to the stallion’s gut, knocking the wind out of him with brutal force. The stallion staggered back and Derreck cocked back his leg and shot it forwards, giving the guy a straight kick that sent him hurtling straight into the far brick wall across from the stalls.

The two other stallions moved on Derreck as I tried to gain my equilibrium, my world still spinning. The stallion on Derreck’s right moved for a hit. My big friend drove a straight punch into his gut with his left fist before giving a low kick into the stallion’s kneecap.

The stallion winced as his busted leg refused to support his weight and he began to collapse. As he fell, Derreck used his remaining momentum to hammer a heavy punch into the throat of the stallion. The force of the hit not only collapsed his windpipe, but sent him careening across the room and into the other stallion whom he’d hit first.

The third stallion who still posed a threat moved to strike. Derreck pivoted then drove his left elbow into the stallion’s throat. He hacked and staggered back as Derreck took a step back.

Crouching low, Derreck swung a roundhouse kick into the stallion’s temple, killing him before his body even hit the ground. My mind was still a little hazy as I tried to stand up.

“Easy, you hit your head pretty hard.” Derreck moved towards me.

“Yeah… but not as hard as you hit those goons,” I joked and he just snickered.

“There’s the Burdy I know and love,” he congratulated. I thought to myself. ‘Yeah, but did I know and love myself this way?’

Through the corner of my vision, I spotted the first stallion standing back up, with one of those hoof bows in his grip. “DERRECK, LOOK OUT!” With a flash of motion, I lept up and pushed Derreck out of the way.

In one fluid motion, my right hand snapped out Belladonna and fired three quick and consecutive shots. The first two struck the stallion’s center mass, slamming him back against the wall. The third and final shot splattered his brains against the wall. Each shot had pierced straight through the stallion and ripped chunks out of the concrete wall.

My ears rang as I was temporarily deafened. The already thunderous gunshots had been echoed inside the small enclosed washroom, almost amplifying the sound. I shook my head as the final stallion dropped dead to the ground, a smear of blood staining the wall behind him.

“Thanks… nice shot,” Derreck appraised me.

I nodded. “Yeah… I uhh… don’t mention it,” I replied, staring at the deceased corpses. At least Derpy was no longer with me. “What now?” I asked, seeing as how my contact was dead.

“We get outta here, before more show up. Come on, let’s get back to the motel,” Derreck suggested.

I depressed the hammer on my pistol and holstered her. “Good idea. I don’t wanna be around when the cops find these guys,” I stated. We rushed up the dark steps of the underground washroom.

Quite to my surprise, there were no screaming ponies. Probably due to the fact that ponies had no idea what guns were. Though they did have those hoof bow thingies. The bows however, didn’t produce a loud report like most firearms.

We traversed out from the washrooms and spotted a black carriage, a really swanky one. It was a newer motorized version and the lights were still on, the beams nearly blinding me as I looked at it.

“I think that was theirs… and I don’t think they’ll be needing it anymore,” Derreck informed me as he walked over. “Come on, hop in. I’ll drive,” he offered and I obliged. Opening the passenger door, I groaned. The vehicle was rather tiny and, like all things in this world, not meant for a large man.

I squirmed into the car, Derreck already muttering curses as he readjusted the driver seat. “Fucking midget ponies,” Derreck cursed to himself. “My shoe is bigger den dis car,” he joked before looking at the steering wheel.

It wasn’t actually a steering wheel. It looked somewhat like an ATV steering configuration in a way. There were two bars that came up, but there were no throttle controls.

On the floor was a set of pedals that closely resembled a manual transmission vehicle’s pedal system. There was also a stick handle on the steering shaft that was probably… well, I had no idea. I'd say the windshield wiper controls but there were no windshield wipers. There was also a stick lever in between Derreck’s legs.

“Alrighty, seems easy enough… just uhh… dirt-bike handles instead of a steering wheel.” Derreck pressed on what we both presumed to be the clutch but the vehicle started to move forwards. Derreck immediately let go of the clutch pedal… or whatever it was.

He held the steering wheel. “Uhm… uhh… well…” Derreck scratched the side of his head. “Maybe I uhh…” he trailed off and pressed on the clutch pedal again. The vehicle started moving forwards but the engine started to bog down.

“I uhh…” Derreck again let go of the clutch pedal. “Okay maybe…” Derreck pressed on the clutch and as the vehicle started rolling forwards, he pressed on what should be the gas pedal, but instead the vehicle screeched a bit and stopped. Derreck immediately released both pedals.

“OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE, I CAN WALK FASTER!” Derreck roared, slamming his fists forwards. His right hand struck the little handle that was on the right side of the steering column.

The motor revved high, probably nearing its limit. Derreck immediately grabbed the handle and pulled it back, settling the engine. “Okay, maybe, uhh…” Derreck trailed off and pushed the handle forwards again while pushing down on the clutch pedal.

The vehicle jogged a little and started moving forwards at a faster speed, not bogging down like before. “Okay so uhh… the little stick thing is the gas and the clutch pedal is… a mixture of the clutch and gas pedal.” Derreck muttered curses to himself about the difficult configuration.

As we neared the exit of the park, Derreck let go of clutch pedal and pressed on what he believed was the brake, the middle pedal. The car jogged as it came to a stop but quickly started to travel in reverse and hammered a tree.

“Shit!” Derreck swore irritably. “Okay, so maybe...” Derreck began to play with the controls again, putting it back into forwards. As we neared the exit, he released the clutch and pressed on the furthest right pedal, which brought the vehicle to a stop.

“Okay, give me a piece of paper,” Derreck ordered.

I reached to the glove box and pulled out a piece of paper and an oiled quill. Derreck scribbled some writing onto the paper then tagged it to the corner of the window. It had the pedal configuration along with the shaft.

The furthest left pedal was labelled ‘Combination of clutch and forwards’. The middle pedal was ‘Reverse’ and the furthest right pedal written ‘Brake’. The handle attached to the steering shaft was ‘Throttle’ and the lever between his legs was labelled ‘Unknown’.

We began down the streets of Manehattan, swerving through the streets at a rather slow speed. “Jesus… this thing is slow as fuck,” Derreck cursed as he cranked the throttle wide open. “Maybe if I…” He began to dick around with the controls again as he was driving.

He grabbed the lever between his legs. “Wonder what this-“ He was cut off as he pushed the stick ahead and the car lurched forwards. “Oh… well that works,” Derreck mused to himself.

The vehicle started picking up quite a bit of speed. “Uhm Derreck… maybe we should… you know… SLOW DOWN!” I gripped the dashboard of the vehicle as he cranked the vehicle around a corner.

The tires squealed as the carriage shook violently, obviously not intended for these types of maneuvers. As we approached the motel, Derreck attempted to slow down. “Alright… if we, uhm… try to, uhh…” Derreck pulled back on the lever but the transmission gears grinded against the lever. He quickly began to throttle down the engine but the vehicle’s motor bogged out and quit.

“OH SHIT!” Derreck cursed as he slammed on the brake. The brake helped somewhat but not nearly enough to stop us before the carriage slammed into a brick wall. Without seatbelts, our bodies were tossed forwards. I slammed my face off the hard dash and split my upper lip while Derreck clacked his head off the windshield, cracking the glass.

He leaned back. “Fuck this, next time we walk,” he told me as we both went to get out. I stepped out fine but Derreck just booted his door off, sending the door itself skidding down the sidewalk.

We both walked into the motel, where the recipient from before was waiting. “You’ve been getting calls nonstop for the last hour,” he informed me. I looked to my watch. It was 1:39pm.

“Yeah… we’ll uh… answer it from our room,” I informed him. Derreck gave him a smile, but his mouth was bleeding due to the impact he took from the windshield. The recipient stallion just smiled nervously.

My big lug friend and I made our way into my room, where Derreck immediately went to the washroom to clean himself up. I stroked my face in exhaustion. “No what do we do?” I asked aloud.

“Ah dunno,” Derreck replied, coming out of the washroom while cleaning his face with a dirty towel. He tossed the towel aside and smiled. Remarkably, all his teeth were still aligned properly and had a sparkly white look to them.

I gave him a smile, my split lip leaking blood onto my teeth and tainting them red. He just rolled his eyes. “Maybe you should brush your teeth more often,” he quipped and I just rolled my eyes. ‘Just brush your teeth and that’ll make them indestructible,’ I thought silently to myself.

The phone suddenly rang and we both looked at it. “Who do yah think it is?” Derreck asked. I swallowed and slowly picked up the old dial phone receiver.

“Hello?” I asked, but all I heard was a mare sobbing. “Uhm… hello?” I asked, but the crying just continued.

Derreck raised an eyebrow. “Who is it?” he asked and I just shrugged. “What do you mean?” And he mimicked my shrug.

“I mean, I dunno. I think it might be some weird sex line or something,” I replied and Derreck’s eyes went wide.

“Oh, let me hear,” he stated, grabbing the phone from me. His face twisted into a strange frown. “Man… that’s a fucked up sex line,” he stated, handing the phone back to me.

I grabbed the phone from him and gave him a stupid stare. “It was a joke… and I think the phone call is too,” I replied before bringing the phone back to my ear.

“Hello? Is this some kind of joke?” I asked, the sobbing no longer present.

“Only if you consider your friend’s life a joke,” said a voice from the other side.

“What?” I replied, not sure what kind of sick joke this was.

“We have your associate, the mailpony, with us. She is unharmed at the moment. However, if you do not give us the vial, her condition will worsen,” the voice informed me.

My eyes went wide as I realized whom the sobbing probably belonged to. “DERPY! I swear to fuck if you hurt her-“ I began to roar, but the voice cut me off.

“You are not in the position to be making threats,” he replied. “Now, I will say it one time; bring us the vial. Go to Central Park, where you killed my stallions… leave the vial in the trash canister just outside the stallion washroom, then leave. Your friend will be released as soon as we get the vial.”

“You release her right now goddammit, or I swear to fuck I’ll gut you!” I boomed, but instead he didn’t reply. I heard more sobbing followed by an agonizing scream. My eyes went wide as I gasped. ‘WHAT THE FUCK WHERE THEY DOING TO HER?!’ I thought helplessly.

Again the stallion’s voice returned. “That was the wrong answer… so we broke her wing. Now, you will listen or we will begin to break other parts of her,” he stated, my rage quickly building and boiling over. “Are you listening to me?” he asked and I nodded silently, but quickly realized that he couldn’t see that.

“Yes,” I snarled while gritting my teeth.

“Now… take the vial to Central park. Leave it in the trash bin outside the door to the stallion washroom, then leave the area. After we pick it up, we will release your friend. But if you do not deliver it by sunrise, then your friend will die… in a painful way.” With that, the phone hung up.

I still held the receiver to my head, the phone itself beeping at me to tell me the line was closed. My eyes were still wide, my rage skyrocketing. Distant memories of Tristan surfaced and reminded me of how helpless I was then… and now. My hand began to clench harder against the phone. Derreck rested a hand on my shoulder. “What’s wrong?” he asked, completely oblivious to what was going on.

“They have…” I trailed off and tensed in anger. “My friend… and they’ll kill her… unless I give them this,” I stated, showing him the green vial. He put on a straight face, took the phone from me, hung it up, and waited several minutes. After several minutes of silence, he picked up the phone receiver and began to dial a number.

He first dialed ‘*’ then '6' and finally '9'. The phone rang for several seconds before the other end picked up. “Manehattan harbour, we’re closed right now but open tomorrow morning at 6:30am. If there’s-“ Derreck cut him off in a deep voice, still a serious look on his face.

“Gimme yer address dere…”

Author's Note

So I recently read this article about a young kid, I think he was under ten, anyway he was bullied for liking My Little Pony and everyone called him gay and taunted him etc. So anyway, poor kid committed suicide. Now today I was at McDick's getting a McFlurry (Cause that's the only thing I really like from McDick's) and I saw they had My Little Pony toys, so I ordered all 8 figures (There's Princess Luna and Celestia, then Twilight, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Rarity and DJ Pon-3, yeah go figure, they leave out Applejack.) Anyway, so they only had Rainbow Dash and the DJ in stock so I got those two figures and they have these little stand mounts to keep their balance in their pose. Anyway, so I'm gonna tape the bottom of the mounts to the dash of my truck (Yes I actually have a 1997 F-250HD that I named Cadence and it's not just some fantasy truck I conjured up in the story) So I'm gonna tape these figures to the dash of my truck just as like a "FUCK YOU!" to all the bullies out there and as a tribute to those who are shunned and shit by others just because they like ponies. There's nothing wrong with liking a cartoon meant for little girls, and if someone ever told me I was wrong for liking ponies, I'd break their nose and say there's something wrong with their nose. I know not everyone is as big and scary looking like me, but just remember, the bullies are only picking on you cause they're scared little cowardly shits who wouldn't say it to people like me. SO cheers everyone (Everypony) and have a good Easter eh!

Chapter 25

‘These things...they look futuristic…’

Third person:

Manehatten…

A finely groomed stallion sat in an office chair, puffing on a thick cigar as he overlooked the sprawling city from his office window. He slowly closed his eyes, exhaling a deep fume of carbon smoke.

The door to his office opened and he sighed before taking another suck of his cigar. “Sir,” a stallion began, waiting for the dressed stallion’s approval to continue.

The stallion slowly swivelled his office chair around, eyes still closed. As he turned to face him, he let out an exhale, all the smoke leaving his mouth with one go. “Yes?” he replied softly.

“Sir, it’s nearing sunrise and our associates at Central Park haven’t seen him yet,” the second stallion replied anxiously.

The first stallion waved him away and he promptly acknowledged the request, leaving without another word. The stallion took one last puff on the cigar before putting it out in the ashtray. “I swear to Celestia…” he muttered as he pulled up his dial phone.

He quickly spun a number and the phone began to ring. Within seconds there was an answer on the other end. “Hello? Who is this?” asked the other end.

“It’s me, yah smuck. Who the fuck do yah think it is?” the stallion replied.

“Sorry sir, it’s just that you told us to clear the line and-“ the other end began but the stallion cut him short.

“Shut up! Get both the prototypes ready,” he ordered and there was a slight pause.

“But sir… they haven’t been tested and-“ the other stallion began but he again cut them short.

“Just shut up and do it. And shoot any bastard that tries to enter the docks dammit!” With that, he slammed the phone into the receiver, ending the phone call. The big stallion rubbed his forehead with his two front hooves.

With that bit of business settled, he spun his chair around, facing the suburbs once again. ‘We should just kill that stupid pegasus,’ he thought nervously to himself.

* * *

Evan’s perspective:

Manehatten harbour…

Derreck and I crept through the shadows and approached the harbour. Several towers on the docks had searchlights running, several stallions occupying the towers as probable scouts. The harbour itself had multiple patrols hanging around several points on the docks.

A lot of them had what looked like crossbows, some ponies had nothing, perhaps armed with concealed weapons. Derreck tapped me and pointed up to one of the towers where a stallion stood idle on his hindlegs, holding some kind of object.

“See that?” Derreck asked and I nodded.

“What is it?” I asked, trying to identify the object in his hooves. It didn’t look at all like a crossbow. It had a barrel but had no limbs or string like a crossbow. It looked like no firearm I had ever seen, maybe it wasn’t even a firearm at all. At this distance, I couldn’t make out any further defining details.

“Whatever it is… we don’t really want to get detected until we’re close enough to take him out… looks like a high powered scope on it. So he’ll be able to take us out from a range,” Derreck informed me and I nodded. I guess this was his operation, so I’d just play by his rules.

“Okay… so how do we do this?” I asked and he shrugged.

“Easy, we sneak in,” he replied and I just rolled my eyes.

“Oh? Just sneak in?... You make it sound simple,” I retorted and he nodded.

“Yeah, it'll be real easy. Just follow my lead.” Without warning he scurried across the street then motioned for me to follow. I scampered across the empty street and pressed myself up to a wall just outside the harbour.

He peeked around the corner of the wall and towards the entrance. “Okay… there’s two ways we can do this. We can either both sneak through the front, or one of us will have to boost the other over the wall and wait for him to knock out the guards at the entrance,” Derreck informed me. “Now… the first way will be more dangerous and we’ll be in plain sight, but… if we split up and go the second way, we’ll be separated and we don’t really have an idea of what’s on the other side of this wall,” Derreck replied.

“Decisions, decisions…” I muttered and Derreck nodded before tugging on his jet black shirt, which was previously white. I just rolled my eyes as I briefly remembered how it got its new colour…

* * *

I went to leave immediately as Derreck got the information he needed. A hand stopped me. “Uhm… we need to redress for the occasion,” he told me and I rolled my eyes.

“How, I don’t have any other clothes,” I said and he nodded.

“Just give me your pants and shirt,” he ordered.

“Do you want my motorcycle too?” I asked jokingly but he shook his head.

“Nah, just the pants and shirt.” I sighed and did as he asked. Feeling like an idiot for doing so, I removed both my shirt and pants. He took them then paced into the washroom.

I sat on the edge of the bed in just my underwear, leaving my duster and hat aside. At first I just heard the sound of duct tape being unrolled. Then, before long, I heard something that sounded like spray paint. I rushed into the washroom.

He was stripped down to his underwear and was spraying our clothes that he had draped across the bathtub on the curtain rail. “What the hell are you doing?” I asked and he shooed me away.

“Go on, get! it’s a surprise,” he told me and I willingly walked back into the shitty motel room. The spray painting continued for another few minutes before stopping. I waited for over a half an hour before Derreck came out, our clothes now painted jet black.

“What the hell did you do?” I asked and Derreck peeled away duct tape from the chest crest of each of our shirts. The duct tape had saved the fabric underneath and now both black shirts had a big white cross on the chest.

“Now we’ll have matching uniforms,” he stated and I pointed to the white crosses.

“That’s like a frickin’ bull’s-eye painted on our chests!” I stated irritably but he stifled a laugh.

“Nah, it’s like the Christian version of The Punisher,” he replied and I just groaned.

“Jesus Christ,” I moaned, leaning my face into the palm of my left hand.

“Exactly what I was thinking,” he joked and I just sighed. There wasn’t much point to trying to spray paint over the cross, we were running short on time as it was.

* * *

Derreck turned to me. “I have an idea,” he told me and I rolled my eyes.

“Let me guess… we’re preachers of god?” I asked but he shook his head then stood up and began casually strolling towards the entrance. He motioned with his hand for me to come with him and I reluctantly followed. ‘WAS HE MAD?!’

The stallion posted at the gate saw us coming and moved to block our path. As we neared he spoke out to us. “Hey buddy, you can’t be here. Authorized personnel only,” he informed us.

Derreck spoke before I could even think about what was going on. “We’re with the union. We heard yah was moving shippin’ without unionized labour. That can’t happen,” he informed the stallion who just grunted.

“Fuck off yah twat,” the stallion snarled.

“We’re just gonna have tah help out, or the union is gonna be pissed,” Derreck replied but got a smack to the face from the stallion’s nightstick. Derreck’s head was twisted to one side, but he casually turned back to face the stallion.

“You hit like a vegetarian,” he insulted before hammering a straight punch into the stallion’s chest. Several cracks sounded from his ribs as he was hurled back from the brute force.

Two stallions closed in on Derreck from both sides. He twisted a haymaker punch to his left, slamming the stallion in the side of the head and knocking him out cold. I swung my right arm out and clotheslined the last stallion.

A spurt of blood spewed from his nostrils as my forearm connected with his snout, snapping his nose out of place. His back thumped to the ground and he was out cold. “Don’t fuck with the union,” I muttered to the unconscious, possibly dead, stallions.

We began slinking through the shadows, completely undetected at the moment. We approached two guards lingering, both smoking cigarettes. I handed Derreck my Bowie knife while I took my remaining, smaller Buck knife.

‘I got the left,’ Derreck mouthed silently. As silent as the shadows that caped our presence, we both snatched our respective stallion, dragging them into the shadows and killing them off silently with a blade to the throat, covering their mouth with our free hand.

With the duo dispatched, we looked to their armament. Both stallions had some kinda… mocked up crossbow. It looked like a regular crossbow… except both had two cylinder things attached. The front drum was just some metal can thing on top of the barrel and the other looked like some sort of magazine system.

Derreck picked it up. “You know… for a peaceful civilization… this place has some pretty wicked shit… and what gives with the bows? I mean, why the hell have they advanced a primitive weapon design so far? These things make the bows back home look like panty waists but… why not… you know?... just build a gun?” he asked and I just shrugged.

“Wanna ask one of them?” I replied with a rhetorical question.

“Nah… I think we’ll just use them. You never know, maybe they’re better than a gun. They’re probably silent,” he informed me, handing back my Bowie knife. We both took one of the bows and checked it over. There was no trigger guard of any kind to cover what I presumed to be the trigger.

The weapon itself was a little clumsy and would no doubt be difficult to shoot accurately. On top of the fact that it had a straight stock and was obviously meant for hooves, not hands, the weapon had no sights of any kind, possibly hinting that it was a close quarters weapon. We saw a nearby patrol coming our way and slipped into a warehouse doorway.

Derreck and I crept through the warehouse. Stacks of crates and other various objects cluttered the place. We stepped through the shadows like ninjas… well, more like rats actually. We stopped as we noticed a red circle of light on one of the crates, moving slowly back and forth.

Derreck looked to me with wondering eyes and I merely shrugged. He stepped forwards and waved his hand between the illuminated crate and light source, the red light now shimmering on his hand in an ominous way.

He pivoted with his eyes wide. “GET DOWN!” he yelled, leaping and tackling me to the ground. A beam of swirly green light smashed through the warehouse wall and into the spot where the light had been, obliterating it in a small explosion. Without so much as a warning, another beam of transient light slammed near us from the opposite direction of the first.

“RUN!” Derreck yelled as all hell seemed to break loose. Beams of green energy erupted all around us, travelling right through the wall like it wasn’t even there, leaving a gaping, melted hole where it entered.

We rushed back from whence we came as eruptions boomed all around us. As we neared the rear entrance, a bunch of scaffolding and work equipment collapsed on us during an explosion.

* * *

Third person…

A stallion posted on a scissor lift tapped on his earpiece. “Target eliminated,” he replied, peering through his X-ray styled scope. His railgun still pointed downrange, he got his orders via headset.

“Enders, Jonas, secure the location. I wanna see the corpse!” the headset ordered.

Two scissor lifts, both on opposite sides of the building, lowered. Both stallions trotted along on their hindlegs, holding their mighty weapons in hoof as they travelled the short distance to the warehouse.

Both entered and began searching the warehouse, their red light X-ray scopes illuminated the spot where their shot would hit, almost like a laser sight, but much more advanced. They stepped through the destruction, their hooves creaking weakened floorboards as they moved along.

Underneath the floorboards and on the concrete ground beneath, Derreck shimmied along with Burdy’s iconic pistol, Belladonna, in hand. Both stallions above him stopped. One of them pressed on an earpiece. “Sir, target eliminate-“ He was cut short as Derreck unloaded the entire magazine capacity into the duo from beneath their hooves.

Heavy 300 grain jacketed hollow points ripped through their bodies from below. Splinters of wood burst from the floorboards as shot after shot was discharged. Blood spewed from their bodies as the heavy slugs tore through them, leaving large exit cavities in their wake.

The stallion on the other end of the earpiece yelled. “Enders?! Jonas?! What the hell just happened?! It sounded like thunder!” he yelled but got no response. “Enders, Jonas, come in goddess dammit!” He still got no response from the two stallions.

“Support team, move in!” the leader yelled over the headset. Over a dozen stallions moved in on the warehouse. Pocketing Burdy's pistol, Derreck let out a roar as he broke through the brittle flooring, boards snapping from his might as he arose from the underneath.

The stallions, now in the building, turned to him, crossbows drawn. Derreck reached to each side of his body, grabbing the pistol grip of each of the railguns, one in each hand. The stallions’ eyes went wide as Derreck began to trigger each weapon.

The barrel of each weapon had a large muzzle break that spewed energy fumes as each projectile was launched from the coiled barrel at hypersonic speeds. Beam after beam was shot downrange and erupted in close proximity to the group, shredding them in explosions.

Derreck tossed the weapons forwards then hopped out from the crater in the flooring he had created. Crossbow bolts pinged off metal as stallions from outside began firing at him.

Without further ado, the hulking man again gripped each weapon, stationing the weapons at hip level. He stepped out from the warehouse and into the harbour. Stallions tried to lock onto him as he began wreaking havoc upon them.

Beams of explosive energy erupted against the watchtowers, putting out the spotlights that shone down on him. Derreck swivelled to meet a group of stallions that rushed him. Triggering the rifles, each beam sped out of the rifle barrel with a whoosh, blowing away any that stood in its path.

The energy bolts connected with their targets, sending them hurtling through the air as the sheer kinetic force blew them back. The brutish man in black clad clothing pivoted on his heels, spewing more havoc down upon the harbour mobsters.

Without hesitation, he slowly started backpedaling towards the warehouse from whence he came.

“Sir, target is retreating!” one of the stallions yelled to their commander.

A stallion in a small trailer office peered out the window and to the massacre outside. He pressed on his earpiece. “Eliminate him, no matter the costs!” he screamed.

* * *

Evan’s perspective:

I arose from the ruble as Derreck moved towards me, two hulking, futuristic weapons in his hands. He set one aside and helped me to my feet. Blood leaked from a gash in my forehead that dripped into my left eye, stinging and blurring my vision.

“Here, take one. They’re bundles of fun.” Derreck handed me one of the weapons. It was hefty for the size, but not overweight. He handed back Belladonna which he had borrowed earlier. I holstered my hand cannon and heaved up the rifle-cannon-thingy.

Derreck looked at the railgun he had, and then to me. "Strange isn't it? They use such primitive weapons yet they have the tech to build things like these... but never produce them in quantity.”

I rolled my eyes. "Somehow..." I groaned an wiped blood from my face, "I think this world would be better off without a bunch of these things kicking around. I hope these are the only ones in existence," I replied back and he just scoffed.

"Yeah whatever... either way, I want one of these for Christmas," he chuckled with a sly grin.

Different to the automatic crossbows, which we never got to use, these weapons had trigger guards, though very large to accommodate hooves. However, the weapon rested nicely against my shoulder. It even had a recoil pad. Two stallions burst in through a window and fired at us.

Both Derreck and I picked our respective targets and fired one shot each. Both our shots struck center mass, slamming the duo back into the wall behind. I walked over to one as I heard his earpiece going off.

“Nightshade! Dusk! Come in goddess dammit!” screamed a voice over the earpiece; it sounded like the stallion from my phone conversation earlier. I picked it up and spoke into it.

“They’re dead,” I muttered in a blunt yet serious tone. I was answered by silence. I could tell he knew it was me. “Ah’ll be right out,” I informed him. I dropped the earpiece and both Derreck and I slowly walked out of the warehouse. We were greeted by an assault force that had assembled. Over fifty armed stallions pointed their weapons in our direction. “Oh shit…” I mumbled.

Derreck tilted his head towards me, never once looking away from the assault group. “Push the button on the front handle,” Derreck informed me in a calm voice and I glanced to him from the corner of my vision.

“Why?” I asked, curious to what he had in mind.

“On three… just do it, then rain hell down on them,” he ordered. Well… I guess he was the leader thus far.

“One… two… THREE!” Derreck yelled and we both pressed down the front grip button. A red, holographic wall projected itself from the scope, separating us from the large group with just a simple holographic image.

Derreck started triggering his weapon before I, and a hail of arrows flew towards us. My eyes went wide, but before I could sputter even a swear, the arrows were deflected off the shield. Derreck continued to trigger his weapon, bringing hell down on the assault force that had cornered us.

Not one to fall behind, I took the rifle into a shoulder hold and peered through the scope, but there was a red X blinking on the futuristic scope. Derreck muttered to me, still firing upon the group and racking up a large kill count.

“Scope doesn’t work while the shield is projecting, just start shooting!” Derreck said. With that, I leveled the weapon at my hip and began relentlessly firing upon the group. Beams of energy flung stallions back with brutal and deadly kinetic force.

Within seconds the group’s numbers were cut down to a dwindling point. “RUN!” yelled one of the group members and the assault force scattered. Derreck flicked off his scope.

“Turn off your shield, it uses battery power and so does shooting,” he informed me, tapping on a flickering digital indicator of a battery that read he had about half power left. I did as he instructed and we began moving forwards though the large harbour.

As we approached the loading yard, I pressed up against one bin and Derreck pressed up against the other across from mine. We both peeked down the alley between the rows of metal containers. Stallions took cover behind crates, boxes, and whatever else they could use for cover.

Derreck gave me a nod and we both twirled into plain view. Our railguns spewed out energy beams that pierced right through any cover the assailants had. Several of the stallions were simply knocked back from the brute force of the projectiles that struck them; the others were killed in the resulting explosions.

We traversed down the alleys, more skirmishes of fighters trying to stand against us. Derreck and I both held our respective weapons in shoulder positions and rained hell down on them.

Bottles with flaming rags stuffed in the necks were tossed at us. Both Derreck and I lept to the side as the improvised weapons shattered, spewing a trail of fire that blocked our path. Sparks sprung off the ground as a hail of crossbow bolts slammed the ground near us.

We both lunged through a nearby window and into another building. Outside, another force of mobsters formed, tossing flaming bottles of liquor at our position. One began yelling, holding a crate of something.

They popped the lid then lit a fuse. My eyes went wide. “BACK!” I yelled and both Derreck and I lept further back into the building as the sticks of dynamite were tossed at the small warehouse.

Explosions ripped apart the front entrance to the building and mobster stallions aimed their bows at the gaping hole in the building, ready to fire on us the moment we left. The two of us stood up and slowly walked towards the entrance of the burning building.

Both Derreck and I stepped into the open, railguns at hip level. We walked through the flames at a slow pace. I could only imagine what it would’ve been like seeing two well-built bipedal men step out of a flaming building, dressed in all black with a white Christian cross on the center of their black shirts.

Both Derreck and I fired in unison. Beams of energy struck just behind a group that took cover behind some concrete rubble. The explosion sent them flying forwards, all screaming in death.

Our aim began taking separate targets, each covering the other’s blind side. A stallion peered down at us from the top of a crane, looking through the scope of his crossbow. A single bolt shot down and pierced my left shoulder.

I grunted in pain and Derreck looked back at me. Still facing his enemies, he continued firing upon them while backpedaling to me. I let my rifle dangle as I examined the bolt stuck in my left shoulder. ‘Damn… the same place that gun lady shot me,’ I thought silently.

Derreck examined the shot wound. “The arrow’s nearly through,” he said before pulling the arrow the rest of the way through my shoulder. I hissed in pain as blood spurted from my wound.

We darted for cover and pressed up against a container bin. My shoulder stung with pain as blood dribbled out from the hole. “You’ll live,” Derreck muttered in an Arnie voice.

“Thanks doc,” I snarked before we both peered down the alley between two rows of container bins. A group of seven stallions rushed into the loading yard. Derreck popped several shots at them, most striking center mass and sending the stallions flying through the air.

A lone unicorn rushed around the corner, levitating crossbow in his magical grasp. Derreck clotheslined him with his left forearm then drove a fist into his head, knocking him out cold… or perhaps killing him off, I wasn’t sure.

A fiery explosion ripped through the loading yard nearby, massive plumes of flames bursting into the air. My friend looked down to the unicorn on the ground and ripped a shred of his clothes off.

He quickly bandaged my shoulder with the stallion’s fine attire. “Now quit yer whining!” he told me. I shouldered my rail gun once more and we both stepped back into the open. A door to a radio antenna shack slammed open and a stallion with an automatic crossbow stepped out, firing wildly at us, the only real noise from the weapon being that of the bolt zipping through the air.

Both of us returned fire, the resulting explosive energy shots destroying the small shack. The antenna relay sparked viciously before falling to the ground, resulting in an eruption of electric sparks that killed three nearby stallions. A carriage burst into view, being manually pulled by two stallions who galloped valiantly towards us while the six or so stallions in the carriage fired at us with bows.

“Big mistake,” Derreck quipped, lining up a shot and firing from the hip several times. Energy blasts struck the carriage and it erupted from the rear, propelling the carriage into a front flip, flinging the lead stallions to their deaths and killing every occupant on-board.

I caught a glimpse of the gleaming of a scope up on the crane again. I swiveled and spotted the sniper who had shot my shoulder. Rather than waste precious seconds on an aimed shot, I simply fired aggressively at the brace supports of the crane.

Explosive energy bursts ripped apart the legs of the crane and it toppled. The crane slammed down into a nearby docked cargo ship. Sparks of electricity from floodlights on the ship and eruptions of fire became ever present as the crane smashed apart against the ship.

A group of at least forty stallions formed into an assault formation and tried a pincer attack on us, coming from two sides at once. “Shields up!” Derreck ordered. Both of us triggered the shields on our rifles then took a back-to-back stance and began firing upon the stallions assaulting us.

With the superficial rifles, it only took a matter of seconds before the entire group was slain mercilessly. Without the need of a verbal order, we both flicked off our shields, our weapons now running low on battery life.

We pressed on through the loading yards, mobsters now scurrying to band together or run away. Regardless, we still fired upon any who stood in our way. A thought quickly dawned upon me. “What about civilians?” I asked and Derreck shook his head.

“Did you see any civies outside the dock walls?” he asked and I shook my head. “Exactly,” he replied as he triggered his rifle several times, blowing away another group that took cover behind a metal crate.

I reached the loading yard edge, near the mucky harbour water and began rushing along as Derreck took position at my flank. An old classic car horn echoed and we both pivoted. An oncoming motorized carriage raced towards us at increasing speeds. Two stallions stood up from the flatbed of the vehicle. They began firing their crossbows at us as the vehicle sped forwards.

Derreck and I both fired a single round at the engine of the vehicle. The rear of the vehicle jacked up in an explosion as it was propelled into the air, flying just a few feet over our heads in a blazing ball of flame and splashed into the shitty, polluted water.

A stick of lit dynamite rolled between Derreck and I. We lept in different directions as it went off, the explosion sending me hurtling even further. My rifle slipped from my grip and skidded along across the concrete ground.

Groaning, I rolled to my back as a group of mobsters approached me. In a flash, Belladonna was drawn and booming. Trails of vapor spewed just behind the supersonic bullet that whizzed into each target.

Blood squirted from their bodies as the slugs tore through the previously fine attire, shredding it apart. In seconds, my pistol was dry but there were still two stallions that tried to level their sights on me.

In the last possible seconds, beams of energy struck their hinds, sending them hurtling forwards in a series of flips. Derreck rushed up and helped me to my feet. “Hurry, leave your rifle!” Derreck ordered as we rushed to cover, a hailstorm of crossbow bolts raining down on our position.

More stallions rushed through the flames of the destroyed loading yard to try and get us, but Derreck had other plans in mind. With one hand, he fired his railgun from the hip, spraying death upon those foolish enough to stick around.

I could only imagine the death count that would arise from this… Mom was going to be SOOO PISSED! That and the collateral damage was probably severe… unless we didn’t get caught…

I spotted a group of three coming up from our flank. With a fresh magazine in Belladonna, I took aim through the now glowing white, luminescent sights. A faint golden light gleamed from both sides of the gun barrel. On the left read 'Belladonna' while the right side read 'And thy lord shalt set thee free.'

Belladonna roared as she spat out heavy handgun munitions. My mighty hand cannon rocked in my grip, the slide hammering back as each shell was fired and ejected. A ring of fire burst from the muzzle of Belladonna every time she fired, illuminating the night further.

As the assailants fell, the slide locked back, signalling she was empty. I spent no time in pocketing the old mag and loading a fresh one. Thumbing the slide release with ease, I took aim for new targets. The gun worked with an almost watch-like precision in my grip. Everything about the gun just seemed to suit me: the grip, the weight, the slide release... everything.

Two separate groups of stallions assaulted our position, yet again trying a futile attempt of a pincer movement. Time seemed to slow for me as I looked to Derreck. He squinted his left eye while looking seriously with his right. He took an aimed shot at a cargo bin being held by a stationary crane.

The energy blast struck the crane’s chains, sparks flying, and the bin fell onto the group of stallions, crushing most of them. The world seemed to spin as I looked aimlessly around. Death… destruction… a massacre, surrounded me in a deafening roar. ‘This is what they get for threatening my friend,’ my conscience spoke. Time slowly came back to reality as Derreck began to fire wildly from the hip again as he began walking towards a group of enemies.

Beam after beam blasted from the muzzle of the rifle as he walked towards the mobsters. Funny… if Rambo had worn Punisher fatigues and had a futuristic plasma, laser, energy railgun thing, Derreck probably would’ve looked just like him, just a lot bigger and taller.

He suddenly ceased firing. “I’M OUT!” he yelled, leaping behind a container bin, putting it between him and the group of stallions. I knelt and began taking pot shots on the group that still stayed out in the open like fools.

It didn’t take long for them to realize my position, nor for my pistol to run dry. I rolled to the side and behind a crate as I started to reload. The shouting of others neared my location and I crept into the shadows. The limbs of a crossbow came into view and I kicked its broadside, knocking the weapon from the user’s grip.

The stallion looked to me with shocked eyes. My fist hammered him in the face, sending him careening back. The others looked to me but it was too late. I planted my feet then twirled my upper torso to face them and started firing wildly.

The heavy projectiles of Belladonna ripped through their flesh like warm butter, spurting blood out their backsides as they were cut down. In a matter of moments, they were all dead, pools of blood surrounding them.

I ejected the magazine, catching it and pocketing it, replacing it with a fresh one. Screams still echoed in the harbor, but I made my way to Derreck who had a smirk on his face. “Nice shooting,” he complimented and I nodded.

I replied in my best Arnie voice as I helped him up. “Lots of practice.” I turned to see more than a dozen stallions rushing through the fiery shadows. “Come wit me if you want to liff!” I ordered, still cracking wise ass remarks like Arnie.

We slipped through the shadows like rats being hunted. Without our uncanny advantage with the railguns, we were a tad bit outmatched. We couldn’t properly fight until Derreck could obtain a ranged weapon with a large magazine capacity.

Hearing the yells and screams of mobsters behind us, we raced between container bins as fast as we could. Derreck stopped me without warning. “Up!” Without even so much as an explanation, he heaved me up onto a container bin, and then quickly crawled up.

I went to stand but he pulled me down, keeping me low. “Stay down. The shadows and elevation will mask our presence,” he informed me quietly. I watched in silence as over a dozen stallions paced into the walkway we had previously been in.

Derreck unsheathed my Bowie knife and licked his lips. “When I give the signal… take aimed shots, and don’t miss. Make sure they’re distracted.” I looked to him.

“What’s the signal?” I asked, but he merely shrugged.

“I haven’t figured it out yet… but you’ll know when you see it,” he informed me, then silently crawled away.

‘Great! Oh yeah, by the way… I haven’t figured out yet how I’ll signal you, but you’ll know,’ I thought sarcastically to myself. The large group continued forwards and I groaned. If only I had’ve gotten something with a larger magazine capacity… like a Glock.

Damn my luck.

The group met up with a second group that only consisted of three stallions. “Where’d he go?” one of them asked and the others just shook their heads.

“Well he has to be here, spread out. Find him!” the one whom I presumed to be the leader ordered. The group separated and began moving through the passageways between the shipping containers.

Down the way, I spotted Derreck as he loomed above two stallions that were unaware of his presence. He looked over to me then into the sky. He brought the Bowie knife up and reflected the illumination of the moon into my eyes.

“Ow… OW!” I whispered and he kept flashing the light at me. I lifted my left hand into view and flipped him the bird. With that, the flashing light stopped. I looked down. The groups had split up into mostly squads of three or four.

I lined up my first set of targets, deciding to shoot right to left. I lay flat, Belladonna in a two hand grip. Taking a deep breath, I stood into a crouch. The group noticed me and went to yell, but were quickly drowned out by the thunderous report of my gun.

The first gunshot took me a little bit off guard, tossing my aim to the right, rather than the left like I had planned to do. The muzzle flash was tremendous, and was only matched by the carnage that ensued when the heavy bullet tore a canal clean through the stallion’s chest.

Everypony’s attention was drawn to the sound of the gunshot. Quickly adjusting the sights, the second and third shots were off within seconds, each hitting their mark. However, despite my advantage of surprise, the fourth stallion leveled a bow on me and fired.

The bolt pinged off the edge of the container bin, making me flinch into cover. “HE’S OVER HERE!” the stallion screamed. I looked to the distance. The stallions beneath Derreck looked towards me and that’s when he struck.

Leaping down from his shipping container, Derreck drove the large blade of my Bowie knife into the first stallion’s throat, then swiftly pulled it out and slashed the sharp blade across the other’s neck, cutting open his jugular.

Reaching down, my big friend picked up a large crossbow, one of those automatic ones we hadn’t got to use yet. I peeked up and fired two more lousy shots, only one of which struck a target, but merely glanced the stallion’s shoulder.

Ducking back down, I looked to Derreck who slowly stepped towards my location, the crossbow in one hand and at hip level. A group plowed around a corner, scrambling to arrive at my location as fast as possible.

Derreck triggered his new weapon. The bow was stunning. Rather silent, only the small cylinder on the front really making any noise aside from the bolts whizzing through the air... it kinda sounded like a battery operated airsoft gun. It came to mind that the cylinder on the top was perhaps a motor of sorts. With every shot, two arms extended from the motor thiny of the crossbow, pushing back against the string while a new bolt was loaded. It was impressive to say the least.

Wisps of the crossbow bolts flying through the air were quieted by the screams of their victims. Crossbow bolts sliced through the mobsters, causing nearly unbearable carnage. Blood squibbed out from the wounds as bolt heads protruded from the bodies of dying mobsters.

I ejected the nearly spent magazine from my gun and loaded a new one. With their attention turning to Derreck, I aligned several pot-shots. With each pull of the trigger, another mobster fell into a puddle of blood.

Now torn in a crossfire, the stallion criminals broke down, unable to compensate for what exactly was going on. Derreck’s auto-bow rate of fire, probably around two hundred and fifty shots a minute, was slow, but it was enough to get the job done.

The slide on Belladonna racked back and locked. Thumbing the ejector button, I let the magazine drop to the ground as I reached for a fresh mag with my left hand. In an instant, a new set of ammo was ready for my baby.

Tugging down on the slide release with my thumb, the slide snapped shut with a CHING. A stallion burst from cover and lunged at Derreck. Left hand free, Derreck gripped the handle of the Bowie knife I had lent him and drove it into the stallion’s chest, probably piercing his heart.

The stallion’s eyes went wide as the life drained from him. Leaning the gun over the slouched pony’s body, Derreck used the corpse as a makeshift shield. Crossbow bolts dug into the dead stallion but failed to penetrate far enough to hit my friend as he returned fire.

I lept down, landing behind a group of mobsters that were still trying to figure out what to do. I lined up quick shots with their center masses and fired without remorse.

The muzzle flash illuminated my face as time seemed to slow. Bullets splattered the stallion's skulls into mist, ripped gaping holes in their chest... ‘This is for Derpy,’ I thought silently.

Within a minute, the entire group was dead. Derreck dropped the bow and looked to me. Both listening, we couldn’t hear any more stallions approaching. I ejected the magazine in my gun, letting the spent mag fall to the ground, and replaced it with a fresh one.

Walking through the carnage of the docks, Derreck and I spotted a stallion rushing to a motorized carriage. Derreck moved with an almost unnatural speed. I tried to match him but he arrived long before I did.

Tackling the stallion into the carriage, he grabbed him by his hindleg then lifted him over to the edge of the harbor. “Please… oh my goddess please don’t kill me!” he begged. Derreck’s face was emotionless.

“The mare… where is she?” Derreck asked in a deep, booming voice.

A second hadn’t even passed as the mobster squealed like a canary. “Manehattenville! The factory! That’s where they brought her!” He began heaving deeply for breath as Derreck still suspended him in the air. “Please… don’t kill me… just let me go,” he pleaded.

Derreck just smirked and did as he asked, quite literally. Releasing his grip on him, the stallion fell. A squelching sound echoed and I rushed over. Looking down, I spotted the stallion, impaled on several bars of rebar that had been strewn about during the attack.

He gurgled and gagged as he squirmed. I quickly looked away. “Jesus Derreck… why’d you do that?” I asked in mild disgust. That was a pretty brutal way to go.

“He asked me to let him go,” he replied. I just rolled my eyes.

“Well come on! We gotta get to Derpy before they find out what happened,” I told him. Derreck looked down the harbor and began walking. “Derreck! We won’t be able to get there fast enough on foot!” I yelled but he didn’t answer.

After walking a few dozen yards, he retrieved my nearly spent rail gun that I had dropped earlier. “There’s probably a few good shots left in ‘er,” he replied and we both looked over to the selection of motorized carriages.

* * *

Third person,

Manehattenville…

Dominic Salvatore, Don of the Gravelli family, sat in discomfort as he watched the news broadcast about a massacre at the docks that happened but a mere ten minutes ago. The news anchor continued her report in utter disbelief. “And with dozens of bodies being retrieved, there is still no word on what exactly sparked this monstrous onslaught.”

“Sweet Celestia…” Dominic muttered to himself. His capo stood beside him and just shrugged.

“Meh… with all that killing, he’s bound to be dead,” the henchpony stated enthusiastically. Both the stallions knew who had caused it. That ape creature that had the vial.

Tapping his hoof against his office desk in thought, he suddenly stood up, trotted outside his office, and into a bar styled room. He sat and poured himself a glass of liquor. His remaining crew members all stood around him, the rest of the crime family absent from the factory.

“He’s dead boss, no doubt,” one of the stallions chimed.

“I think he’s right,” another added in. In response, however, Dominic threw his liquor glass at the wall, shattering it to pieces.

“Don’t think! Pray, cause if he ain’t dead, he’ll be coming here!” the don yelled. He looked around. “Where the fuck’s that mare?” he asked in irritation.

“We got ‘er bound up in the back room… for safe keeping. That and she wouldn’t shut up,” one of the stallions replied. Dominic grabbed a bottle of fine vodka and drank right from the source.

“Kill her… he’s obviously not into negotiations.” Dominic set his bottle down.

“Oh shit…” one of the henchponies said aloud, gulping in fear as he pointed to a security screen. The entire group looked over to the screens and spotted the front gate. A newer styled motor carriage barreled through the gate and crashed right through the factory wall, that certain camera feed cutting out as the carriage smashed the camera.

The crash could be heard from their upstairs office room. A single occupant stepped out of the vehicle, dressed in all black except a white cross on the center of his shirt. The large man walked over and thumbed the button for the elevator.

“Shit!” several stallions muttered at once, grabbing for their weapons. The monitor flickered as the man leveled his gun on the camera and shot it out, the screen going black.

Dominic grabbed a hoof-bow. “He’s coming up the elevator. Everypony cover that goddess damned door!” he ordered and everypony in the room leveled their weapons on the elevator door.

The readout atop the elevator slowly rose as the elevator ascended. Several of the mobsters began sweating profusely, Dominic included. As the elevator reached its destination, a ting sound echoed as the doors began to open.

With the doors barely open, every stallion in the room opened fire. Sparks flew as the metal crossbow bolts bounced off metal while at the same time penetrated the fabricated walls inside the elevator.

“Woah, hold your fire!” Dominic ordered and everypony ceased firing. Stunned and baffled, the group looked to the empty elevator. Dom looked suspiciously then pointed to one of his underlings. “You! Check it out!” he ordered.

The said stallion trotted forward, gulping as he arrived. From what he could see, the elevator was empty. He turned to the group. “He’s not in here,” he informed them. No sooner had he said that, Burdy dropped down from the ceiling of the elevator, having suspended himself there to avoid being shot or detected by the untrained eye.

Grabbing him around the throat with his left, Burdy fired the massive railgun with his right. The destructive gun spewed out energy rounds that blew back any that it hit. “TAKE COVER!” Dominic ordered, but nopony even needed being told.

Rushing for cover wherever it could be found, stallions overturned tables, hid behind pillars, and even lept behind the bar booth. Several shots were fired at the big man, but all connected with his pony shield, killing the stallion in seconds.

Leveling his rifle, he blew off several shots in all directions. The kinetic energy beams blew right through the cover of his enemies, shredding the stallions as debris and shrapnel from their cover eviscerated them.

Taking a wide shooting arc, Burdy fired shot after shot, some not connecting, but overall inflicting heavy casualties among the remaining crewmembers. Without warning, the gun ran out of energy and shut down with a whirring sound.

Burdy looked down at the weapon and simply dropped it, replacing it with Belladonna. His rail gun now useless, the mobsters tried taking advantage of him with sheer numbers.

Dropping his deceased shield, Burdy lept for cover behind a pillar as crossbow bolts sprang at him. Peeking around the corner, a stray shot glanced across his forehead, dazing him severely.

He dropped to the ground as his world spun. “I GOT HIM!” yelled one of the mobsters. Lifting his weapon in a daze, Burdy popped off two shots that struck the stallion’s center mass, sending him hurtling back and into the wall, his blood smearing the steel as he slid down onto the floor in a heap.

Letting his arm swing to the right side, Burdy fired wildly at two more stallions behind an overturned table. The heavy jacketed hollow point ammunition punched right through the flimsy wood and ended the lives of both stallions on the other side.

Sliding himself up against the pillar he had taken cover behind before, he ejected the magazine in his gun before loading a new one. He let out a deep exhale and stroked his wounded forehead that now bled slightly.

A lone stallion fired a shot that glanced of his already wounded shoulder. Burdy grimaced as the stallion yelled out. “I GOT YAH! YAH BASTARD! YER DEAD!” he yelled, probably at the top of his lungs.

Burdy peeked around the corner and fired once. There was a brief silence as the body fell forwards and beside the big man, a pool of blood leaking out from the body.

“You’re a lousy shot… I hate lousy shots,” he muttered in a deep voice that really didn’t sound like him. Two stallions burst around his flank and fired at him, the bolts whizzing way high where he would be if he was standing.

He looked over to them with a serious gaze and fired several shots into them, sending their bodies twirling back. Burdy swiveled around the pillar and continued shooting at the remaining stallions.

Each pull of the trigger boomed out another deadly shot that pulled the life from a criminal. The gold engravings on his pistol seemed to glow with an even brighter holy illumination as he quickly took down each mobster.

A mobster burst from cover and fired a hoof-bow that just barely missed Burdy’s head. Leaping behind a couch, Burdy rolled as several shots pierced into the couch’s fabrics, some zipping right through.

With a new magazine loaded into the gun, the big man leaned over the top of the couch, firing several shots into the aggressive stallion. Blood squirted from several gunshot wounds as he was tossed back and into a lifeless heap.

Rushing to the left, Burdy stopped on open ground just as two stallions tried to rush him head on. Without really aiming, the brute of a man just fired at them, hitting high but still striking a kill shot on each stallion.

He rushed to another pillar, the spent magazine being ejected as he ran. A stallion behind the bar counter lept up and tried to hose him down with an auto-bow. Burdy lunged forwards and into a roll, sliding into a knelt position and shooting the henchpony several times in the chest.

With an iconic scream, the stallion was tossed back into the booze cabinet, glass panes and bottles shattering apart. Two more stallions rushed him from the left. Burdy went to acquire a shot in a two handed weaver stance, but a lone shot winged his left arm again, slicing it open in another spot.

“ARG!” he groaned, pulling the gun up in a single handed style. Emptying the entire magazine into the duo, Burdy quickly sprang for cover as he struggled to load a new magazine. After several precious seconds, the man managed to load a magazine.

Several of the still living stallions took advantage of this and hosed down his position with a hail of fire. Bolts merely bounced off the concrete pillar but still managed to chip away at it.

With a swift roll, Burdy moved his position to that of yet another couch, which was quickly riddled with crossbow bolts. As he crawled along, a lone stallion tried to rush him. Firing two shots, the pony was tossed back and the human continued on. Peeking over the couch briefly, Burdy fired several wild shots, only one of which struck a target while the others ripped holes in the wooden liquor cabinet.

Another stallion with an auto-bow tried to rush him from behind. Burdy fired several shots into the henchpony’s gut, ending his life abruptly as his body toppled over just inches from the man. His main weapon empty and not having time to reload safely, Burdy reached over and retrieved the automatic weapon.

Tipping the weapon’s front end over the couch, he blind fired at the remaining crew. Firing left to right in large, slow arcs, several stallions were caught in the shooting and fell with shots protruding out of their bodies.

The human’s weapon ceased firing and he merely tossed it aside and began struggling to reload his pistol. As he was loading the new magazine, a stallion quickly rushed up to him, hoping to take him by surprise.

This was not the case, however, and Burdy quickly gripped his Bowie knife and flung it at him. The blade slashed into the stallion’s chest, making him scream out a pained grunt as he fell.

Loading the pistol, Burdy rushed forward towards the bar where the remainder of the stallions waited. Leaning up against a post, Burdy narrowly avoided the incoming shots that sparked off the metal post he hid behind.

One stallion tried to rush around and Burdy blind fired in his path, making the stallion back up in fear of being shot. Pivoting around the post, the man fired at the back pedalling stallion, launching his body back.

Burdy, now in the open, fired another two shots towards a second target. The stallion twirled into a cabinet of booze, smashing the liquor bottles and spilling the contents. A third stallion tried to quickly fire from the hip and Burdy rolled to the side, taking a kneel and shooting the stallion several times in the chest, sending him careening back and toppling over the counter in a spray of blood.

Dominic and his lead capo rushed off towards his office and Burdy snapped off several sloppy shots. One of his rounds clipped the capo’s hindleg, collapsing him in pain.

Disregarding his left arm’s pain, Burdy quickly slapped another magazine into his mighty hand cannon, but Dominic was already hiding away in his office. The capo screamed in pain. “ARGH… YOU MOTHER FUCKER! YOU STUPID, GODDESS DAMNED HEATHEN MOTHER FUCK-“ He was cut short as Burdy blew away the stallion’s head with a single point blank shot, blood residue spewing onto Burdy's face.

“Nopony talks about my mother like that,” he told the deceased body. The big man began slowly walking towards the office of Dominic, the Gravelli family’s don.

Inside, the stallion furiously tried dialing the number for the police. “You stupid fuck!” Dom yelled out, trying to buy himself precious seconds as he pulled a bookshelf down in front of the door.

* * *

Evan’s perspective…

I kicked down the door, a bookshelf flinging out of the way, and the stallion inside the office looked to me with shock as he scrambled for his weapon. With my elbow slightly bent, I hip fired my gun. Thunderous booms nearly deafened me, but the muzzle flashes did a pretty good job of burning flashes into my sight as well.

The stallion’s body was tossed back and over a desk, blood dripping from several holes in his body. I paced over casually and grabbed a bottle of fine liquor from his table and popped the cork.

Looming over his dead body, I poured the contents onto his corpse. “Fine dining,” I quoted in a thick Arnie accent. Derreck entered the room and smirked.

“Fine shooting cowboy,” he appraised me and I nodded. “Come on, your friend is over here,” he told me, leading me out into the bar room again. As we walked along, he pulled my Bowie knife from the chest of a dead stallion. He eventually led me over to a closet door. I opened it and was greeted by a cowering grey pegasus whom was blindfolded and mouth gagged with several layers of tape.

Derreck handed me my Bowie knife and I cut away the gag. “PLEASE DON’T KILL ME!” Derpy cried.

“Sssh… Derpy, it’s okay… I’m here now,” I whispered gently. There was a moment of silence as I sheathed my knife then slowly removed her blindfold. Derpy breathed heavily as she looked upon me.

I gulped then slowly took her into a loving embrace. “I’m sorry I didn’t get here sooner… goddess, how could they do this to you?” I whispered and felt Derpy’s chest heaving heavily as she wept in pain.

“Come on, before the police arrive,” Derreck ordered.

“One thing first,” I told him, standing up. I looked to Derpy and pulled out the vial of goo… the thing that had caused it all. “This… this caused all of this… this senselessness. And who knows what will happen if I give it to the Liotta’s. Derpy… you were right.” And with that, I dropped the vial of goo that had started it all. Stomping on it, I crushed the contents into the ground, making it completely useless.

Derreck looked to me. “You sure that was the best thing to do?” he asked, looking down at the stained floor. My answer was simple and thoughtful.

“If this is what happens over this… this stupid marketing shit… then maybe it’s best if it doesn’t go into anypony’s hooves. Who’s to say they won’t still fight over it…” I trailed off and Derreck nodded.

“Well, okay then… if that’s all, maybe we should be leaving?” he suggested. I nodded, cradling Derpy in my arms as we left. As we arrived outside the factory, several black, high class carriages arrived and armed mobsters stepped out.

Among them, however, was Antonio Leone. “Hey kid… leave anything for us?” he asked.

“Just bodies,” I replied back, in a stern voice.

“What about the vial? Our guy got whacked in the washroom but a bunch of Gravelli scumbags were there too,” he asked.

“The vial was destroyed by some bastard in an office up there, said if they couldn't have it, nopony would,” I lied fluently, pointing to the building. Antonio cursed to himself then looked back to me.

“I tell you kid… I ain’t seen potential like you in a long time. I could use a stallion… er, whatever the hell you are, in my business. Whatta yah say?” he asked hopefully. Derpy looked up to me with teary eyes, fearful of my answer. I looked down to Derpy, then over to Derreck who had an exhausted look on his face. Looking back down to Derpy, I put on a straight face.

I looked over to him. “No chance,” I told him in my most serious voice but... well it ended up sounding a little like Arnie, but just a little. Derreck patted me on the shoulder.

“Well, I’m gonna go my own way. We’ll meet up again sometime. Hopefully on better circumstances,” he told me and I nodded.

Derpy chimed in. “Who are you talking to?” I just shook my head as I watched him walk away into the dark streets.

“Don’t worry about him Derpy, he’s just an old friend,” I informed her. Antonio’s voice caught my attention.

“Well kid… if you ever want something, anything reasonable, just ask. I owe you one for crippling these Gravelli bastards,” he told me and I raised an eyebrow.

“Well… maybe… there is one thing…”

* * *

Hours later…
Derpy and I had snuck into the boxcar of a train headed out of Manehatten and towards Ponyville. A gentle and rather sad musical tune played from a junky radio inside the boxcar. Now it was early morning, but the sun hadn’t quite rose yet. I stroked Derpy as the locomotive chugged along.

“There is still no leads into what happened tonight in this massive massacre. With no prior extreme escalation, the motivation of this attack is unclear and undetermined by police.”

I stroked my hand through Derpy’s mane as the train travelled over a bridge that passed above a river far below. “Evan?” she whispered and I listened closely.

“When asked about the incident, the Liotta family organization denied any allegations of involvement in the affair. They simply stated they had no public motivation for such a massacre but said that ‘The bastards deserved every last bit of it’.”

I continued to stroke her beautiful mane. I had wrapped her broken wing in medical bandage when I retrieved my duster coat and hat from the motel just before leaving for the train yard. I planned to get her to the hospital as soon as we got back. “Yes Derpy?” I asked in a hushed tone.

“Reports have come in that a single assailant attacked both the harbour and the dock within the time period of an hour and a half. Further reports state the stallion was wearing all black except a white cross coloured into the chest of his shirt. None of the deceased were dressed in such fatigues and police are still on the lookout for such a suspect.”

“Thank you,” Derpy whispered. “Thank you for rescuing me. I know that I said you were different, but… I don’t think you are,” she whispered, filling my heart with warmth. “You killed them because they were going to hurt me and… you’re still the same stallion… human that I liked before all this happened,” she told me and I smiled, brushing her mane aside so I could see her crisscrossed eyes.

“With emergency crews working strenuously, over two hundred and fifty bodies have been confirmed dead, of which one was the infamous crime lord Dominic Salvatore, the rumored leader of the Gravelli crime syndicate. With bodies still being found, this remains one of the largest massacres in the history of Equestria.”

I gently kissed her forehead. “I love you Derpy, and you were right... I should've never agreed to do this.” I gently stroked the side of her cheeks and she nestled into my chest, cooing softly as she tried to discard the horrible things that had happened tonight. “I’m sorry that you had to go through that Derpy… if I could reverse it… I swear I would,” I told her and she nodded.

“I love you too,” she whispered back. With that, a long silence occurred, in which nothing but the sound of the locomotive engine sounded. Beams of moonlight flashed through the forest trees and into the boxcar as the train traveled through a forest. After a long while, I realized that Derpy was sound asleep, her chest slowly expanding and contracting.

I reached over to some smaller crates of cargo, retrieving a lone pencil and paper, then began to scribble down a letter for my mother/teacher.

‘Dear mother,
Sometimes... sometimes you do something because a friend asks you to but you don’t want to refuse because they’ve helped you in a similar fashion. But sometimes that favour can hurt another friend in a way you wish never happened. And that sometimes can break one’s trust with another. Sometimes doing a favour for a friend can hurt others, even if it was not intended. I guess what I’m saying is that I have to learn to thoroughly think something through before I do it, rather than just charge in without a second thought.

Yours truly,
Burdy’

Author's Note

Yes I know, it took forever to get this out, and I'm really sorry. As a token of my apology, I will give one minor spoiler about the next chapter. Twilight and Burdy's 'relationship' starts to go far beyond that of mother and son in the next chapter as Burdy starts to develop deep feelings for his mother. I'll try to get the next chapter out faster... well... actually I have the chapter done it's just being edited.

Chapter 26

‘Oh those, they’re nothing really, just old scars…’

Burdy's perspective:

Thursday May 7th, 2014...

I entered Ponyville Hospital shirtless and in nothing but a my black pants, in case anypony recognized my shirt from the news broadcasts. I guess in hindsight that was a pretty big epidemic... and I would've never guess that many mobsters died but I regress, they deserved every bit of it. Before we had reached Ponyville, I had stopped off at Flim and Flam's garage to retrieve my truck, and rip them a new one.

They were surprised that their calculations were off and had apologized sincerely, saying that they owed me one but... I wasn't sure I wanted to be around them... at least for a little while. They just seemed like the wrong crowd to get in with.

I brought Derpy up to the counter and set her down to all fours. The receptionist looked to me, then to Derpy and noticed her bandaged wing and my poor attempt at a sling, which consisted of duct tape and a musty sheet from the motel I had stayed in. "She uhm... broke her wing," I informed the mare who quickly began scribbling things down.

I looked to Derpy, whom spoke first between us. "You'll come and visit me right?" She asked hopefully and I nodded with a wink.

"Of course. I wouldn't leave you here with them," I said jokingly with a smirk. I noticed Redheart who immediately spotted me out and began making her way towards me, trying to flag me down. "UGH! Gotta go Derpy, love yah!" I exclaimed, giving her a quick kiss to the forehead and dashing away. I could distinctly make out Redheart's voice as she screamed my name, yelling for me to stop.

* * *

Twilight’s perspective, Ponyville Library,

It was early, that’s all I could tell at the moment. A constant whining and barking from downstairs kept me awake for now. Luckily the barking didn’t sound saddened, but rather excited. I could hear Lassie’s claws scratching away the door’s furnishing. I was about to groan in irritation, but a low rumbling sound caught my attention.

The rumbling wasn’t aggressive in any sorts… It was Cadence! Ahem, not Princess Cadence, it was Evan’s Cadence, his truck! I nearly flew out of bed, and I would’ve but my wing got tangled in my bed sheets.

I collapsed on the floor with a rather loud THUD! “UGH!” I groaned in exertion as I flapped my wings as hard as I possibly could, flinging the bed sheet away and resulting in it knocking over my night lamp and the book I had been reading last night.

I lept over the railing and fluttered down to ground level just as the front door was opening. Lassie didn’t even hesitate, she pushed the already opening door out of her way as she lept at the tall man in the doorway, yipping happily as she nearly took him off balance.

“LASSIE!” Evan squealed in a bubbly tone as he flopped down to his haunches and let Lassie lick his face.

“Ugh… you know she’s been licking herself, right?” I scoffed and Evan simply chuckled.

“I love you too, Mom,” he chuckled back at me. I just rolled my eyes and stood in the doorway as he rolled around with his dog, almost as if the duo hadn’t seen each other in ages. Lassie stood on his chest and kept licking his face until it was a gleaming mess of dog slobber.

Finally, with a deep exhale, Evan stood up. He was missing his undershirt but still had his worn out duster that Rarity had crafted. Unlike any pants I had seen him wear before, he had black trousers on.

As I was still in thought, he grabbed me and heaved me up into his arms, holding me above the ground and hugging me affectionately. With a peck to the check, he nestled his nose into my neck. “I missed you Mom,” he stated and my heart fluttered.

It was still weird for him to be calling me mom, due to my feelings for him, but I’d let them go on for now. I still needed to figure out why he thought of me like that before I made any advances on him, a choice I had recently come to mind with.

“So…?” I asked inquiringly.

“So?” he asked back.

“What were you doing?” I asked and he just shrugged carelessly.

“Helping out Flim and Flam. I had to stop by there this morning to get my truck back. I would’ve been back earlier but… well, never mind.” He sounded so calm, as if nothing was wrong. Well, I guess nothing was wrong. He had been gone for longer duration's of time before and got back in one piece, so this was no different.

He paced away and down to his room, or well… I guess it was still the basement, but it was where he resided for the time being. Maybe now that he was growing out of his old habits, he could sleep somewhere better… maybe the spare bed in my room.

I quickly shook off the thought, knowing where I’d be headed. “Twilight, you have to figure out what’s on his mind first!” I scolded myself before looking towards his room and sighing.

I wonder to myself sometimes… what was it about him that made me so desperately in love with him? Was it his bold and courageous nature? His rather calm, almost shy nature towards new ponies? Even now, as he was growing out of his old customs, he was getting even softer and gentler. Even his voice didn’t seem as coarse or rough anymore.

I shrugged off my thoughts and figured I had been thinking too long and decided to go spend some time with Evan. I went at first to his room but found it empty. Heading back upstairs, I heard some voices, two masculine ones, coming from the balcony.

I recognized one as Evan, but the other was different and one I hadn’t heard before. It was very deep and had an almost frightening tone, despite the laughter in their conversation.

As I neared the balcony, the conversation came to an abrupt end. “Alright man, see you later,” I heard Evan say, probably to the other.

“Oh probably,” the deep voice replied. Seconds later I was on the balcony, but only Evan and Lassie were there. Evan was laid back and relaxed in a lawn chair while Lassie sat by his side.

I peeked over the balcony to see whom it might have been. There were many ponies, but none looked large enough to muster that kind of vocal depth. Big McIntosh trotted by, but I knew he could never speak in such a deep voice like that. Sure his voice was masculine, but the voice I heard was…

“Who yah lookin’ fer?” Evan asked and I turned back to him.

“Who were you talking to?” I asked curiously.

“Oh just a friend. Don’t worry about him... he’s a good guy.” Evan yawned, a tinted pair of mirror shade aviators over his closed eyes.

“Where’d he go? Nopony came down the stairs,” I replied and Evan just mingled his hand to the side.

“Oh he probably just hopped off the balcony, knowing him. He’ll probably be half way out of Ponyville by now,” he stated. Maybe his friend was a pegasus. I was going to ask but obviously Evan didn’t show much enthusiasm in talking about him.

Lassie mumbled something that was unintellectual and was something along a few grumbles and a series of short barks.

I had no idea what she had meant, but I pulled up a lawn chair and laid back in it, just like Evan was doing. Evan muttered to me… or maybe it was to Lassie… or maybe it was even to himself. “Nice weather eh?”

“Mmm-hmm,” I replied in a very relaxed voice, my eyes closed as Celestia’s wonderful sun beat down upon us with a satisfying warmth.

We laid like that for what must’ve been hours, before I finally looked over to Evan. He didn’t have any footwear on. I noticed how strange his feet were compared to a pony’s hooves. He had four smaller toes and a large one, almost like an ape.

His tinted aviators concealed his eyes, which were probably closed… I think he was sleeping, judging by his body’s slow breathing through his nose and relaxed nature, or maybe he was just at peace with himself.

He had a pair of blue jeans on that were faded at the knees and a striped golfing shirt that had several large burn holes in it. “EVAN WHAT HAPPENED?!” I gasped, having never seen this shirt before.

“Hmm… mmm… what?” he asked groggily as he tilted his head to the side and looked to me, the frame of his glasses glimmering in the sunlight. He looked at his arm then chuckled slightly. “My skin is tanning,” he replied.

I facehoofed. “No, not that! Your shirt! What happened to you?!” I gasped. He looked down to his shirt, grabbing it with just his index finger and thumb and pulling up a bit of his burnt shirt.

“Oh… this is the shirt I had when I was on fire,” he replied calmly just before lying back again.

“WHAT?! When were you on fire?” I asked worriedly and he thought briefly to himself.

“Oh jeeze… uhm… I guess about…” He took a deep breath as he scratched the side of his head. “About two years ago in autoclass…”

* * *

Evan’s perspective:

Summer 2012…

It was brutally hot… probably 104 degrees Fahrenheit. The grade twelve auto class teacher was having me build him a tailgate for his trailer because… well, I just say because he’s a teacher and he’s too damn cheap to just buy himself a new tailgate.

On top of the already hot temperature, I was inside an insulated school mechanic shop that had no A/C and really shitty roof fans. Added to the fact that I was wearing heavy coveralls to protect myself while I used a MIG welder... things just felt unbearably hot.

Sweat poured down my face from behind the welder’s mask as I welded the metal mesh onto the back of the tailgate. My mask visor was a little fogged, but not enough to hinder my vision.

My body started to heat up unbearably as I continued to weld on the mesh. The buzzing scorch of the welder in action drowned out most other noises of the workshop. My body continued to feel hotter and hotter with each passing second.

Soon, there was too much sweat on my face to handle and I needed to wipe it off before it got in my eyes. I set the welder aside and raised my mask to wipe my forehead, but my eyes went wide as I saw my lower half engulfed in flame.

“I’M ON FIRE!” I yelled as I began to hop around like a crazed bunny with its head lopped off. “I’M ON FIRE! OH GOD I’M ON FIRE!” I yelled in a somewhat hysterical, somewhat humored, voice.

I tried patting myself down, but only then did I start to feel the pain of being burned by fire. I began to yell in slight discomfort as I flopped onto the ground and began rolling on the smutty floor. Within seconds, the fire was out and I laid there, smoke floating off my body while I chuckled to myself.

Several students looked at me with humored looks, knowing I had again gotten myself into some sort of predicament that could've attained me a Darwin Award, had I not been so damn lucky. The auto shop teacher walked over. “Evan… are you alright?” he asked, somewhat worried for my well-being.

I patted myself off, brushing away the ash from the burnt coveralls that were now all but useless. “Yeah,” I replied as I slipped off the coveralls. My jeans were burnt, but not as bad as my golf shirt. I patted myself down but winced in pain as I realized I had some mediocre burns on my belly and waist. “Just some minor burns,” I replied boldly. "Dammit... this was a good shirt," I joked.

“So…” he stifled a laugh. “How did it become so that you were on fire?” he asked with a smile, still trying to hold back a laugh.

I licked my lips with an equally stifled laugh. “Well you see sir… I was welding your tailgate…” I trailed off.

“Uh-huh?” he asked, motioning for me to continue.

“And it was getting really hot…”

“Uh-huh.”

“So I lifted my mask to wipe the sweat off my head… and… uhm… it uhh... I was on fire,” I said with a short chuckle.

He rolled his eyes. “Okay Evan… just try to be more careful next time,” he informed me, then left to go help others in the classroom.

I closed my eyes for a brief moment as I smirked and stifled a snicker, but my smile quickly faded as I looked to my shirt. “Dammit… I kinda liked this shirt…”

* * *

Twilight’s perspective:

Present day…

My eyes went wide. “Were you okay?” I asked, worry in my voice. He nodded with a laugh.

“Oh yeah, I was fine. Just put some ointment on the burns and wrapped it up.” He sounded so casual about it, almost as if it was just an everyday occurrence.

“That sounds painful,” I replied and he shrugged.

“Yeah, but not as painful as the time my hand got cut by a bandsaw. I don’t remember what I was cutting… or maybe I was cleaning it or something… anyway, my hand got sliced by this sharp blade on this saw in the construction class and I was like “Ow! Shit!” and the teacher always knew, when I said ‘Ow’ I had hurt myself. So he rushed over and saw that I was bleeding and was like, OH EVAN! YOU NEED TO GET THAT CLEANED RIGHT AWAY! Keep your hand cupped so it doesn’t bleed onto the floor and go to the washroom and wash it out! Quick, before it gets infected!” Evan was laughing like it was a joke.

“So I walked to the washroom without cupping my hands, so there was this trail of blood from the construction room, down the hallway, and to the washroom…” He trailed off and started laughing.

“Evan… that’s not really funny,” I told him but he waved his hand at me.

“Oh… ooh… oh, if only you could’ve been there. It was priceless. The teacher’s face was like.” He put on a shocked face, like somepony who had just seen another pony whom had just lost a limb and was bleeding badly.

“Well… you know, Evan… that’s sort of the reaction most ponies… err, people, would give,” I replied, but he just shook his head.

“Well… not really. Well maybe... but only if they can’t handle the sight of blood. Everyone thinks it hurts, but really, it just tickles.” My eyes went wide.

“How could that tickle? That’s not what a tickle feels like. Tickles don’t hurt!” I informed him but he just nodded.

“Sure they do. It’s like… just a little pinch of pain, rather than a lot,” he informed me. My jaw dropped.

“Evan… tickles don’t hurt… not at all. They’re supposed to… well… tickle,” I tried to explain and he nodded.

“Exactly. All those times, I didn’t really get hurt, I was just tickled,” he replied but I shook my head.

“Evan, that’s… that’s not tickling…” I trailed off, secretly extending my wing. I brushed my wing against the side of his neck and he jerked away.

“AH! What the fuck was that?!” he yelped in shock.

“That… was a tickle,” I informed him, brushing my wing against his exposed ribs, through the burn holes in his shirt.

“Ah! Stop it! Those aren’t tickles… they don’t… Eh! Stop,” he giggled delightfully. I continued my tickle assault but… it was weird… didn’t he know that this is what tickles felt like? Isn't this kind of what Lassie does to him all the time... and he seems to like that.

Evan fell off his chair and disturbed Lassie’s slumber. She grumbled to herself as she paced away, wanting to relax and not be part of our shenanigans. “AHH! Ah, stop it! Ahh I give! I give!” Evan laughed, squirming beneath me.

I let up on him and allowed him to relax. He exhaled a deep breath. “Why'd you do that?” he asked and I kind of wanted to slap myself in the head.

“Those are what tickles are. They're supposed to be fun. And doesn't Lassie lick and tickle you?” I replied and he raised an eyebrow.

“No... Lassie licks me cause she loves me... and besides, those aren’t tickles. Tickles feel like getting poked in the ass by a pin… or getting nipple twisted…” He trailed off, chuckling silently to himself. “Back in high school football… the football players always acted a little… queer; if you will, towards one another. So anyway, a couple guys used to sneak up behind me and nipple twist me because they knew I had sensitive nipples… I also got the nickname 'Strawberry Nipples' because my nipples are big and poofy,” he informed me and I raised a concerned eyebrow. He didn’t really think that tickles were a form of minor pain… did he?

“I… I… really?” I stammered and he nodded before pulling off his shirt.

“Oh yeah, just look. My nipples are a little different… oh… I guess pony nipples don’t look like human nipples. Anyway, most guy nipples looked like raisins or something, but mine are like big strawberries,” he explained to me and I just blinked as he slipped his shirt back on.

“No… I meant… you don’t seriously think that tickles are a form of minor pain… do you?” I asked and he nodded.

“Well aren’t they? I mean, it’s not enough to make me double over in pain… but it’s enough to offer me discomfort. Isn’t that what a tickle is?” he asked and I shook my head.

“No,” I replied. How could he ever think that tickles were a form of pain? Before I could ask another question, his stomach rumbled.

“Oh, I’m hungry,” he stated, quickly standing up and proceeding back into the library. I was struck with shock. What kind of childhood did he have? For someone to think that a tickle is a form of pain…

“Hey Mom, you want some waffles?” Evan called out to me. His question stunned me.

‘Waffles? At this time of the day? It’s afternoon, not breakfast,’ I thought to myself. I stood up and trotted downstairs, into the kitchen where Evan was just starting to cook some waffles.

“It’s almost four,” I stated, taking a brief look at the clock and Evan nodded with an, ‘Uh-huh’ for his answer. “So isn’t it the wrong time of the day for waffles?” I asked, but he shook his head.

“Nuh-uh, never a bad time for waffles,” he stated. I snickered and walked past him, gently brushing my wing feathers against his exposed skin as I passed. “Eh!” he gasped, again having experienced a real tickle.

I looked back to him and smirked. “What?” I asked mischievously.

“Don’t do that,” he said with a chuckle.

“Don’t do what?” I asked coyly, pretending like I didn’t know what he was talking about.

“You know what… that,” he replied and I paced over to him, again brushing him in a ticklish way, making him squirm.

“That?” I asked deviously.

“Yes… that. Stop it… hee-hee… or else!” he warned through a squeamish laugh.

“Or else what?” I asked playfully.

“Or else… I’ll get you back,” he laughed, gently tackling me to the floor and poking at my side. He poked again but not in a ticklish way.

“How the…” he trailed off and brushed his hand against my side, but still failed to tickle me as I tickled the hay out of him, his body twisting every which way as I laid it to him.

“Ahh! Ahh… what? How do I get you?” he asked. I stopped for a moment.

“Don’t you know how to tickle somepony?” I asked curiously. Even if he had misinterpreted the word, surely he’d know how to tickle somepony.

“Well… if this is what tickles are… kind of… but not really,” he said. I was shocked. Well, at least he had comprehended that this is what a tickle really feels like.

“Well… to effectively tickle somepony, you have to gently brush your hand against a sensitive part of their body, like the bottoms of their hooves, or in your case, feet. Or in the crevice of you neck and shoulder, your sides… places like that,” I informed him.

“So…” He trailed off and brushed his finger across the backside of my ribs. My body shivered from his touch. “Like that?” he asked and I nodded before brushing my wing up his side.

“Yupp… and like this!” I giggled, rolling his body over and straddling myself over himself. I began to tickle his sides with my hooves while I extended my wings downwards and tried to get his feet.

“Ahh! Ahh… you little…” he laughed like this was one of the best experiences he had ever had. His fingers danced along my sides and raised the fur along the back of my neck as my body shivered from his tickles.

We laughed and giggled as we tickled each other. Suddenly he rolled me back over, placing himself atop me. I tried to roll our bodies over to give myself the advantage, but my hindlegs couldn’t get where I needed them to go due to his larger body size.

He tickled along my lower sides, forcing my hindlegs to twitch and stiffen. My legs locked around his hips and pulled me into his body. I tried feverishly to tickle him back but, despite being a novice, he really knew how to go.

I tried furiously to get my wings to graze his sides, but it only worked a little. He laughed and giggled, but his body didn’t cave like I was hoping it would. As he tickled along my sides, my legs locked tighter around his hips, pulling us closer together as I squirmed beneath him.

“Ahh! OKAY! Okay, I surrender!” I squealed in delight. He stopped, both of our breathing heavy as we stayed locked in our pose, our bodies gassed from the playful activity.

His chest expanded and contracted at a very steady rate while I had difficulty controlling my breathing. His hands were at my sides and I noticed a look in his eyes. Almost a gleam. He blinked, a look of uncertainty on his face.

My hindlegs dropped from his sides, but I continued to lay there beneath him as I waited, wondering what exactly was going through his mind… and what was going through mine.

It was like nothing else really existed at that moment…

“Twi…” He trailed off, his voice gentle like an afternoon breeze... and I nodded. He went to say something else but suddenly a PING! echoed and he jumped up. “I UHH! IT ISN'T WHAT IT...” he gasped, spinning around to see what it was, and let out a relieved sigh when he realized it was just the toaster spitting out the toasted waffles. He closed his eyes and let out a deep exhale.

I slowly stood up and approached his side, looking up into his deep brown eyes. “Evan? What were you going to say?” I asked in a very hushed voice.

“Oh… uhm… I uhh… I was…” he stammered nervously. He stuttered to himself for several seconds before finally blurting out something. “You wanna go out for dinner? I was thinking that maybe waffles aren’t the greatest thing for supper. I’ll go get changed and uhh… we’ll go out, okay?” he nervously asked his question.

“Oh… okay,” I replied unsurely. My mind was still a blur and I wasn’t exactly sure what was going on.

* * *

Evan’s perspective:

I rushed downstairs in a fluster. ‘What the hell was that?’ I thought to myself. ‘Tickles?’ I thought then shook my head. Other people had always thought I was strange when I said that my wounds just tickled but that’s all it felt like… tickles.

My heart was racing, I felt so strange. “Why the fuck am I feeling like this?” I hissed to myself as I grabbed my head in distress. For a brief moment back when we stopped, I… I just… I felt so weird… mushy…

I just felt so strange towards my mother… like I wanted to just hold her like that and… and… and KISS HER!

“What the fuck is wrong with me?” I asked silently, pacing circles around the floor. My heart was still racing as I was unable to comprehend what was happening. I bit my lower lip nervously. My teeth were chattering as my heart pounded away in my chest.

Part of me just wanted to go back upstairs and hold my mother… hold her close, and kiss her. The other half…

My fist tightened and I hammered myself across the jaw. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” I hissed at myself, maddened that I would think about my own mother in such a way. I rubbed my jaw slightly while I started to slow my breathing. The feel of fresh pain forced away the mushy feeling.

“Okay… now you’re gonna forget this ever happened… alright,” I told myself sternly and I took a final, deep breath. With that, I slipped on some new clothes.

I proceeded upstairs where Lassie and Twilight were waiting. There must’ve been a slight red mark on my cheek. “Evan, what happened?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Oh, it’s nothing. Come on, let’s go,” I offered, slipping on my duster coat and cowboy hat. As we left, I stopped and was about to go for a gun, just in case.

I stopped and looked at Cadence, who held all my most precious belongings, some of which weren’t even firearms. I looked back to Twilight and moved to her side, deciding instead not to bring a gun.

“Not bringing a gun?” she asked in an almost stunned voice.

“Nah… I won’t need it. Equestria is pretty peaceful.” I gave her a smile which she promptly returned.

The sun shone brightly over the town as the afternoon continued. We didn’t really immediately go looking for food and instead just traversed through the town. Lassie skipped along, barking at squirrels and birds, while at the odd time even chasing passing leaves that were caught in the slight breeze.

Despite being a large dog now, she still acted like a foolish young pup. I felt Twilight nestle in close to me and the feeling from before started to return. Not in full, but it was there again. I took a deep gulp as my body stiffened a little. ‘What is happening to me?!’ I thought.

I wanted to hit myself again, but… instead I just slowed a little. My mother stopped. “Evan?” she asked.

“Here… it might work better this way,” I offered, helping her to her hindlegs and letting her body rest against mine as support as we slowly walked through the streets. Her balance was a little offset due to ponies always walking on all fours, but with my body as a resting post, she managed to walk on her hindlegs with a sense of ease.

She rested her head against my shoulder, her horn just under my chin. She hummed a lovely tune to herself as we walked along, now arm in arm. My mind tried to usher me to stop, but I pushed my conscience away. This moment… it was so relaxing and filled my heart with a feeling I had never felt before.

Her humming tune almost brought a tear to my eye. ‘Tickling,’ I thought to myself silently. ‘I like tickling.’

Eventually it became late. A brief look at my watch indicated it was closer to 8:30pm. I put my watch arm down and cradled my arm around her like before as we continued on through the dimming streets.

Lassie stopped and barked to me, telling me she had found a particularly tantalizing smell for us to get. “Where are we going Lassie?” I asked and she put her nose to the ground and began sniffing. Strange… shouldn’t the airborne smell from food make her sniff the air? Oh well…

We followed Lassie around town until finally she led us out to the food vendor we had eaten at last time. “This it Lassie?” I asked and she nodded with a quick bark. “Alright,” I replied, pulling out my wallet.

I looked through my bits. I was starting to run out. I wasn’t exactly the greatest with money, and it was really starting to show. ‘Maybe you’ll have to go treasure hunting again,’ my conscience picked up and I remembered treasure hunting with Daring… who apparently wasn’t real… or maybe she kept a secret identity.

Remembering how she had left me for dead, I quickly discarded the thought of treasure hunting, at least for the time being.

“Lassie?” I asked, picking up a menu and showing to her. She barked and began to whine to herself, almost in thought, then pawed at the menu, but her paw danced over several pictures.

“The fries?” I asked but she shook her head and again placed her paw on the menu, but pawed against several pictures. “The onion rings?” I asked once more, but she whined in distress then grabbed the collar of my coat and tugged me down, pulling my face close to the menu, then circled her paw over the pictures of the fresh potato fries, the onion rings and the garlic breadsticks with cheese cooked in the middle.

“The fries, the onion rings AND the garlic bread?” I asked and she nodded.

“Okay… Mom?” I asked and she looked over the menu.

“Oh… I’ll just have a hay sandwich with lemonade and a salad please,” she ordered.

‘Jeeze… she always orders so lightly,’ I thought to myself. “Uhm… I’ll have… some garlic bread, some onion rings… some fries, some lasagna… oh, can I have some spaghetti? And, uhh, can I have a glass of…” I looked at the menu and realized they had chocolate milk in cartons.

“Can I have some chocolate milk… and a banana sundae… and uhh…” I trailed off and looked at the rest of the menu. Most of it was geared towards ponies. Hay sandwiches, salad, stuff like that. “Yeah, that’ll be all,” I ordered and the vendor stallion raised an eyebrow.

“Do you want that to go?” he asked jokingly but I shook my head with a smile.

“Mmm… no thank you,” I replied and he raised a wondering eyebrow.

“Jeeze… how do you stay in shape?” he asked, looking at my muscular frame.

I put on a somewhat serious face as I replied in an Arnie accent, “Lots of exercise supplemented with nuts and berries.” He laughed and shook his head in humor.

“Okay buddy, I’ll have it ready; lickety split,” he replied and, with that, began preparing our food. I walked over with Twilight and Lassie to our table and took a seat across from my mother, Lassie taking a seat beside me. The table was again candle light, but this time it had a small rose between us.

“You know Evan… that’s a lot of food,” Twilight said and I just shrugged.

“Yeah, but you know who is probably gonna eat most of my food,” I informed her, using my left thumb to point to Lassie whom sat on my left side. Twilight just rolled her eyes.

Twilight looked over to Lassie. “You know Lassie, eating that much food might make you pudgy,” she teased and Lassie playfully growled back.

“She says with how little you eat, you might go anorexic,” I translated and Twilight’s eyes went wide.

“I will not!” my mother snapped back and Lassie gave a dog laugh, which sounded really weird. I know I’ve heard her laugh before, but every time she does it just sets me off.

The moonlight cascaded down upon us and I tilted my head to the side before looking up at the moon. I felt a furry hoof lay atop my right hand and looked over to Twilight. “This is wonderful, Evan. I really enjoy spending time with you,” she told me with a smile, a slight hue of blush on her cheeks.

I placed my left hand over top her hoof and smiled back. “Me too… me too,” I stated. She placed her other hoof over top of my left, now making it a stack of hooves and hands.

I twisted my right hand around and cupped her hoof in my palm, then began to stroke the underside of her hoof with my left, while caressing her with my right. A feeling came over me… I couldn’t really explain it, but it just made me feel peaceful… and loved… and like nothing could ever go wrong.

“I love you,” I said in a quiet tone, just loud enough so that she could easily hear me. “If it wasn’t for you, I’d be nowhere… probably dead or… well actually, I’d be some bloodthirsty soldier fighting in some goddess forsaken oil war… if you didn’t…” I trailed off.

Was I truly happier here than I was back home. Was I ready to believe that this place… this peaceful world where bad things almost never happen… was I ready to tell myself I liked it more than my old world.

I gulped. “If you hadn’t taken me in… I would’ve… I don’t know where I’d be.” I couldn’t piece together what I was trying to say.

“Evan, come here,” Twilight said with a motion of her hooves, and I leaned forwards. Very slowly, she leaned forwards, towards me, her head slightly tilting to one side as her eyes gently shut. I didn’t have any idea what I was doing, but… my body moved without my command.

I leaned forwards also, my head tilting as my eyes closed. Our lips met and time seemed to slow as her soft, wet lips pressed into mine. After… goddess only knows how long, we separated.

I opened my eyes with disbelief. ‘Did I just kiss my mom… passionately?’ I asked myself as I gulped.

“It’s okay Evan. When Celestia first told me that I should take you in as a student… I’ll admit that I wasn’t thrilled... to be perfectly honest I was rather irritated and thought that you nothing more than just an animal… but I’m happy that I was wrong. I love you in ways words can’t explain, and…” She trailed off and we just looked into each other’s eyes.

I… I didn’t know what to say…. How to say it. Whatever was happening… it was beyond me. How could I feel this way about my own mother?! It was so wrong on so many different levels.

Luckily for me, however, I was saved by the bell… or food, actually, when the vendor stallion came to us with our larger than average meal. “Here yah go,” he said, also handing me the bill which I promptly paid with a ten bit tip.

Stuffing my wallet into my right pocket, I rubbed my hands together in anticipation as my stomach grumbled. “Mmm… let’s eat!” I announced. I didn’t really need to tell Lassie, whom had started eating before I had even paid the bill.

I let out small stifles of laughter as Lassie attacked her fries, spilling over the carton and nosing through it. As she quickly devoured the fries, she started onto the onion rings. As she neared the end of them, she snuck her head into the carton but didn’t compensate for her now larger size.

The carton got stuck on her head and she swung it to and fro before it finally flew off her head. She let out a playful yip then continued to scour her food. I slowly began to delve into my own food, but no sooner had I done so, Lassie started attacking my food.

“EH! Those are my breadsticks!” I growled. Lassie turned to me and growled back playfully, one end of the breadstick in her mouth. I grabbed the other end and we tugged on it, splitting it in two before racing to eat more than the other.

Twilight just laughed, watching the two of us scourge the food. She let out a short and gentle sigh. “Oh Evan… what am I ever gonna do with you? A colt stuck in a stallion’s body,” she said with a content sigh.

Lassie ended up trampling over the lasagna and getting dust, dirt, and other muck into the sauce. I opted to let her have that while I took an early start on my fries. Before I had even eaten a few handfuls, she started at my fries as well.

Looking over, I saw that she had just made a big mess, eating three quarters of the meal while spreading the rest across the table cloth. The fries barely lasted a few seconds before Lassie attacked my sundae.

She took a big chomp out of the ice-cream but yelped in shock as the cold desert touched the back of her sensitive canine teeth. She quickly clucked her lips before choosing to lick the ice-cream instead.

I grabbed a spoon and began eating it as well. Twilight frowned. “You’re not really… eating ice-cream with Lassie… are you?” she asked hesitantly and I nodded. “You know she licks herself, right?” I nodded before replying to her question.

“Yeah, but… meh,” I replied and continued on with the ice-cream. As we finished up, Lassie looked to the spaghetti but only belched loudly before hopping off the table and curling up by my feet.

I reached down and stroked her head several times before giving her a scratch behind the ears. Her jaw opened wide as she let out a whiny yawn, then lapped her lips several times before finally resting her head on my foot. “Oooh… you’re so adorable Lassie… yes you are… oooh you’re sooo cute!” I spoke in a bubbly way, almost like I was speaking to a young baby foal.

I looked over to Twilight who was just finishing her salad and had already eaten her sandwich. I poked a fork into the spaghetti and looked at the… “What are these?” I asked, prodding at the balls in the spaghetti that were partially covered in sauce.

“Hayballs, they’re delicious,” Twilight replied. My stomach almost twisted at the thought of eating hay. Once as a little kid I had eaten grass because I thought… horses and my dog eat grass, so I should be able to as well… yeah, let’s just say it didn’t taste good and we’ll leave it at that.

“Uhm… you want it?” I asked, pushing the plate towards her then rolling the hayballs to her side of the plate. She smiled brightly, levitating up a fork of her own. We sat there and started eating the spaghetti at a rather slow pace.

Twilight was a little more graceful while eating, twisting her fork in circles to wrap the spaghetti noodles around her utensil. I, however, just scooped it up and ate it, the noodle strings constantly whip-lashing my face.

As we neared the end of the spaghetti, Twilight pushed the last hayball over to me. “Here, you have it,” she offered but I shook my head. “No really, I’ve had all of them. It’s the least I can do,” she offered and I chuckled.

“When I was really young… I thought, ‘Hey, if my dog eats grass, then so can I. It must taste good.’… It didn’t. I have this hinting suspicion that humans and ponies have some different preferences in food, and I don’t think hay is one of the things I’d like. So… thank you, but really, you have it,” I told her.

She sighed and ate the last of the hayballs, along with the last spaghetti noodles. I pulled up my carton of milk and looked at it. Little arrows on the top indicated which side to open it from. I spun the carton around and opened it from the other end.

“What are you doing?” Twilight asked. “You’re supposed to open it from the other side. Look, the arrows tell you which side to open,” she informed me and I nodded.

“I know. I just like to be different sometimes,” I laughed, opening the wrong side of the carton. My mother just laughed to herself as she watched me butcher open the carton and drink the contents.

With a content exhale, I looked to the night sky, and all its stars. Twilight again rested her hooves over my hands. “Evan, this is wonderful. I love spending time with you,” she told me and I nodded.

“Yeah, me too,” I said back and we just started stargazing. Before I knew it, the vendor was back, this time with a dessert menu.

“Can I interest you three in desert?” he asked in a very polite tone. I looked to Lassie, who was on the verge of passing out, before looking to Twilight, who tilted her head to one side. I could tell just by her look that she wasn’t really feeling like something big.

“Uhm… maybe something for two?” I suggested. The vendor stallion propped open the menu and showed a picture of some chocolate strawberries. Twilight nodded with a smile and I nodded in return.

“Yeah, sure, looks good,” I told him. The vendor nodded and promptly left to get our desert. “Never had chocolate strawberries before. How 'bout you?” I asked Twilight, who shook her head in return.

“No. The thought of chocolate on fruit doesn’t always seem appealing, but it did look delicious in the picture, so I thought maybe we could give it a go,” she replied. I leaned back and let out a relaxed and somewhat exhausted exhale, almost a yawn.

I let out a chuckle. “A day well spent productively wasting time,” I laughed out a statement which made Twilight giggle.

The moon shone down on her face and made her eyes gleam in the night shade. Her face had an impeccable sharpness to it that really defined her beauty in such a way that made my heart nearly skip a beat.

My jaw slacked slightly as I gazed upon my mother, my stomach getting a fluttery feeling… but maybe that was from all the food I just ate. She looked back to me with a loving look in her eyes.

I kind of just wanted to… lean over and kiss her... again… I winced internally as I forced the thoughts away, trying to beat them down so they’d never resurface. ‘The fuck’s wrong with you?! That’s your mother you sick fuck!’ I thought to myself violently.

Before I could berate myself further, the vendor returned with a tray, setting it down between both Twilight and myself. “Thanks,” I gave him my thanks, along with the due payment and another ten bit tip.

I looked to the tray and gulped. The strawberries were aligned in such a way that they created a heart, with a small saucer of whip cream set off to the side. “Sooo… uhh…” I trailed off and looked to Twilight.

“Here, I have an idea,” she offered, her horn lighting up. A strawberry was coated in a purple aura then was levitated over into the dipping cream, putting a slight topping of whipped cream on it before she finally levitated it over to me.

“Oh… thanks,” I thanked her, reaching for the strawberry.

She giggled. “It’s okay, here let me,” she offered and I chuckled briefly.

“Oh… alright,” I said, opening my mouth and letting her place the strawberry inside. As she set it in my mouth, I gently closed my jaws, crushing the berry in my mouth. Chewing it around, I gave a nod.

It wasn’t to die for, but it tasted alright. I licked my lips, but before I could speak, Twilight had another berry ready for me. I wouldn’t say anything about it, but I wasn’t feeling like eating more than a couple of these berries; they weren’t something I’d want to eat more than ten or twelve of, but seeing as how there was only about twenty, that shouldn’t be an issue if we split them.

I slowly took hold of the berry with my teeth and chomped it down before I quickly reached over, picked up a berry and dipped it, before presenting it to my mother. She giggled to herself with a bright hue of blush spreading across her cheeks. She sheepishly nibbled at the tip of the berry before indulging herself with the rest.

For the next several minutes we exchanged berries with one another. As I was ready to feed her the last one, I accidentally slipped up a little, and ended up dabbing cream on her nose.

“Whoops,” I apologized, but she merely stifled a laugh and tried to lick at it. I too tried to stifle a laugh, but I wasn’t as good as her at controlling my laughter. Without my command, my body almost instinctively moved on its own, leaning towards her at a slow pace. My face came close to hers as I extended my tongue and licked the cream off her nose.

Her face tilted down as she blushed an even deeper red. I was frozen in place, my heart racing… I didn’t quite mean to move like that. Her face was so close to mine I could nearly feel her breath.

She looked up to me and time seemed to stand still. Before either of us could speak, Lassie grumbled to herself, catching our attention and making both of us gasp in shock. I turned my head to my canine friend who was shaking her head side to side in a somewhat agitated way.

I let out a nervous chuckle. “Heh-heh… hey Lassie… what’s wrong? Did you wanna try one of those berries?” I asked sheepishly, embarrassed about how my body was acting on me.

Lassie let out another series of grumbles, saying they probably wouldn't have tasted good, then took her index claw and made a gagging gesture. “Heh-heh,” I laughed nervously. “Yeah… you might not have liked them… too sweet for you,” I joked in a stammering tone.

I quickly began to feel the results of exhaustion set in and yawned loudly. Rubbing the tears from my eyes that had accumulated during my yawn, I looked to my mother. “I think…” I was interrupted by yet another yawn. “A nap,” I finished.

She nodded, her exhausted looking eyes the telltale sign that she too was tired. I stood up, as did she, and we joined arms, Twilight walking on her hind legs again, then began to make our way towards the library.

It was late now, very late, and the moon was high above, along with the night’s beautiful, star filled sky. Twilight leaned into me, humming to herself in a lovely way as we walked along, Lassie trotting behind us rather silently.

Before we reached the library, Lassie began tugging on my coat’s flaps, growling but not in an aggressive way. I looked down to her with tired eyes, almost unable to understand what was happening.

“Huh… Lassie… what’s up?” I asked in an exhausted tone. She tugged us towards an open meadow that had tall grass, which passed my knees. She barked excitedly. “No Lassie… not time to play… time to sleep…” I trailed off, almost too tired to even speak.

She barked again and laid down, almost as if she too was ready to go to sleep. Even in my tired condition, I caught on to what she wanted to do. It was warm enough outside… and it could only really get warmer…

“Uhm… Hey Twi?” I murmured and she nodded against my shoulder. “I know it sounds strange to ask, but… you wanna sleep out here tonight?” I didn’t get much of a reply, but I understood it plain as a sunny day sky.

“Mmm-hmm,” she whispered, her eyes closed and barely awake. My knees nearly gave out faster than I could balance myself as I slowly lowered both our bodies onto the soft, plush ground.

I laid on my right side, my mother lying down in front while still facing me. Lassie curled up by my feet. I kicked off my boots and socks to let my feet have some fresh air. Within moments of lying down, I was out cold.

* * *

Many years ago…

It was early morning, and the fresh dew was still present on the fresh lawn outside the family home. My brother and I sat, anxiously awaiting the moment for our mother to come home.

She had promised us early in the week, Monday to be exact, that as soon as the weekend came around, that she’d take us to Wonderland. It was a rather important promise, as we had only been to Wonderland once before, but were too young to really remember the magic of amusement parks.

With nothing else on our minds but the amusement park, we sat and waited anxiously. As time passed by, we continued to wait… hour after hour passed until the day came to a close, yet our mother had never come home, leaving both my brother and I in a state of great sadness…

* * *

Years later…

It was a Sunday, and as the rules stated, firearms were not to be discharged in my area on Sundays… I guess it was something to do with public disturbances, regardless, I sat on my ass doing nothing.

My brother was inside with his friend, whom I called my son. His mother had lost her shit again and went berserk, so once again I was taking care of him until she calmed down.

My mother, my real mother, was out drinking; no real surprise there. I twiddled my thumbs and a thought came to mind, one I hadn’t thought about in a long time. The memory made me recall how terribly sad I had been… how heartbroken…

I quickly stood up and waltzed right downstairs and up to my brother and ‘son,’ who were watching T.V. “Alright, let’s go to Wonderland,” I said, out of the blue, with absolutely no warning, no whim or why, and absolutely no pre-existing talk of it.

They both blinked in utter shock. “What?” they both asked in confusion.

“Get some clothes, take a shit, piss, whatever, and let’s go to Wonderland,” I ordered. “Unless you don’t want to?” I asked and they were both baffled.

My son pitched up. “Wait… you’re not serious, are you?” he asked in complete disbelief. I nodded, but my brother decided to discourage me.

“Dude, that’d be expensive. And besides, we haven’t packed a lunch. We need to plan these kinds of things before deciding to do it,” he stated, almost like some kind of parent.

“I don’t care, we’ll buy food there. Let’s go,” I told the two of them. My son quickly lept up off the couch with my brother in tow. The two of them did what they needed to do and we quickly raced for the door.

My grandmother looked over to us. “Where are you all going?” she asked in shock, seeing us run like the house was on fire.

“Wonderland,” my brother replied. She opened her eyes wide in surprise.

“WHAT?! Since when? I never heard you guys planning this,” she said, stunned from the information.

I informed her of the details very briefly. “Nah, we didn’t plan it. I just decided I wanted to go to Wonderland, so we’re going,” I said with a smirk.

“Oh… okay. Well, have fun, and be careful,” she offered. We nodded then rushed out the door and to Cadence, my truck. Hopping in, my son sat shotgun while my brother took up one of the back seats.

I flipped the naughty key before quickly turning the key in the ignition, but not attempting to start it. As I let the glow plugs run, I clapped my hands together in quick succession while squealing ecstatically, like some caffeinated five year old. “OH BUDDY! I’m so pumped!” I squealed even louder, still clapping my hands together so fast that it was just a blur of motion.

My son patted his hands down against the sides of his seat several times, almost as quickly as I was clapping. “I KNOW DUDE! Like what the fuck? Just out of the blue, you were just like: Let’s go to Wonderland,” he said, excitement pouring out of him.

The glow plug light flicked off and I quickly keyed the ignition. The big engine rumbled to life, building up further excitement. My brother chimed in on the excitement. “Oh my god, I can’t wait to go on Behemoth!”

I slipped Cadence into gear and sped out of the driveway, like a bat outta hell…

* * *

Present day…

I burst awake with a gasp, my memory quickly fading in my thoughts. Heart pounding in my chest, I gulped and tried to slow my breathing as I attempted to recall what was going on.

The night ambience quickly entered my ears and I realized I was in an open field. With my heart settling, I let out a relieved sigh. As I turned to go back to sleep, my shirt chafed at my neck.

Squirming slightly, I slipped off my shirt and tossed it aside then went to pass out again. As I went to lay back down, I heard Twilight shivering. Looking over, I saw her shaking, curled up to try and keep warm.

I licked my left index finger and raised it into the air. The breeze was cool and the air was colder still.

I slipped off my duster coat, fluttering it over her. Within moments, Twilight’s body settled into a cozy doze. A gentle breeze blew past, sending shivers up my back. “Ahh… that’s fucking cold,” I whispered to myself, instinctively crawling underneath my warm duster coat.

I let out a chilled huff as my body was embraced by the warmth of my custom coat. My bare chest brushed across Twilight’s soft back, sending a gentle sensation across my body, one which I was unfamiliar to. She was warm... very warm. I snuggled in closer to her...

At first I was shocked and stunned by the feeling… but considering the cool weather… it was either the weird feeling, or freeze my ass off in the cold, so the choice was obvious. I snuggled in closer against my mother, setting my left arm over her body and my right arm curling up on the ground above her head. The feeling of her fur against my bare chest was… strange, but it felt nice at the same time. I snuggled in even closer, her soft fur offering a comfort that I somewhat enjoyed.

I rested my head on my right bicep and, within minutes, I was asleep...

Author's Note

So, just to give credit, the spaghetti and hayball idea was BRD's, he didn't specifically ask me to do it but I kind of wanted to do something like that but thought "How the hell could they eat meatballs?" but alas, he sparked an idea, so kudos to him.

And a piece from the next chapter just so you guys/gals can ponder on it while you wait:
I leaned back against the wagon wheel with a sigh. "Well... about... a year and a half ago, I was gonna finish school then go for the military," I informed my big red friend.
"Did you?" he asked curiously and I shook my head.
"Nope," I replied subtly.
"Why not?" He asked in slight curiosity.
"I got stuck at a farm," I informed him.
"Whatta yah mean stuck?" he asked in a somewhat confused voice.
"Well..." I began, "That's a long story..."

Chapter 27

‘Changing morals…’

Friday, May 8th, 2014

My mind was hazy as I felt a tongue doing laps around my face. “Mmm,” I groaned tiredly. The tongue continued to do laps on my face. “Ugh!” I groaned, somewhat irritably.

The tongue trailed down my face, down my neck, and between my shoulder and neck. “AHHH!” I gasped, waking fully from the terrible… ticklish… it ‘tickled’… tickles.

I looked up to see whom it was tickling me, only to see my faithful canine companion, who was panting with a wide smile, a bit of drool dripping down onto my already wet face. I frowned.

“Dog… do you mind?” I asked and she just continued panting, her entire body moving as she wagged her luscious tail. I went to pet her with my right arm, but realized that not only was it numb, but tucked underneath my mother’s body.

My left arm was tucked over her body and she held my forearm snuggly, almost like I was a blanket. Her warm fur felt nice… and comforting. Her mane looked more like a rat’s nest though; hair straggling about with grass and dirt in it… but I suppose that’s what happens when one sleeps on the ground.

Lassie gave a playful whine and poked her paw at me. “Muh… I’m still tired,” I told my faithful companion, who only persisted. “Ugh… it’s too early.” With that thought in mind, I wondered exactly what time it was.

My watch was on my right wrist, which was held in place by my mother lying on my arm. I leaned my body over top of my mother to get a look at the watch. “Oh hot damn… it’s late,” I told myself as I realized it was closer to 9:30am.

My movement stirred Twilight awake and she looked to me with dazed eyes. “Mmm… good morning handsome. How’s my boy this morning?” she asked in a groggy tone, having just woken up.

“Dunno… just woke up,” I stated, looking down on her from above. My heart started to pick up again and that feeling returned… the one that had been plaguing me lately when I was this close to my mother.

With her mane straggled like it was… she looked kinda adorable. Twilight stretched out, allowing me to retrieve my numb arm from underneath her. She moaned to herself with a yawn as she rubbed eye boogers away.

I rolled to the side, lying flat on my back and trying to return blood flow to my arm. Twilight sniffed something then groaned. “Ugh… I need a shower… and you need to wash this coat. It stinks,” she laughed playfully, tossing the coat at me.

The coat landed on the top most of my body, covering my face and blinding my view of the world. I let out a chuckle as I reached and pulled the coat off my face with my left hand, my right arm still incapacitated for the moment.

Tingly feelings jolted through my arm as fresh, oxygen filled blood began to flow through again. “It doesn’t stink that bad,” I laughed playfully, taking a whiff of my coat.

Twilight rolled on top of me, giggling while she took hold of my coat in her magic. She levitated it up to her face and took a sniff, immediately turning her head away and pretending to gag. “It does too!” she exclaimed and I chuckled lightly.

“Does not!” I playfully chimed back and she nodded.

“It does too! Mommy knows best. You’re washing this when we get home,” she giggled, tossing the ‘stinky’ coat at my face.

“Oh, you’ve done it now. I’m gonna get you for that,” I laughed, snagging my leg around her hindleg and flipping our bodies over. She let out a surprised laugh as I got on top of her and ruffled her fur with my coat.

“Oh you didn’t!” she giggled, using her magic to pull my legs out from under me. My balance was thrown off and she quickly reversed our position, her now on top. “I’m so gonna get you for that!” she laughed, tangling the coat around my face.

Lassie yipped excitedly, and then tackled Twilight off from atop of me. “WAH!” Twilight gasped as Lassie took her by surprise. Lassie began to lather Twilight’s face with dog slobber, Twilight laughing erratically as she tried to force away the canine who continued to mercilessly lick her face.

I got the coat off my face. “Yeah, get ‘er Lassie!” I laughed. Lassie stopped and looked back to me then jumped at me, knocking me onto my back and attacking me with her tongue. “ACK! Lassie! You’re supposed to be on my side!” I laughed.

Her tongue was relentless, and I only saw one way of defeating my traitorous friend. I grabbed my coat and stuffed it over her. Her legs got entangled into the sleeves and she collapsed.

I loomed over top of her body and began to snuggle my face into her neck as I made baby cooing noises. Lassie thrashed playfully as I began giving her human kisses to the sides of her face. Unable to defend herself, Lassie squirmed beneath me.

Without warning, Twilight tackled me from the side and the two of us rolled along in the tall grass, laughing all the while. I used my overwhelming strength to overpower her and hold her down by her forelegs. “Ah… ahh… you got me… ha-ha…” she laughed and trailed off, panting heavily and smiling with a radiance of beauty.

Her body pinned beneath me… I felt like butterflies were in my stomach and I gulped. This feeling… it felt strange and weird… making me want to squirm out of my body.

Twilight quickly rolled our bodies over and I was pinned, unable to move due to this feeling I had. “Evan…” Twilight whispered in a hushed and breathy voice.

My heart thumped in my chest as my hands reactively glided up her sides. The feeling in my stomach spread throughout my lower abdomen region and my breath became choppy and stuttered.

‘Is it wrong to feel this way about my mother?’ I thought to myself. Whatever the feeling was… I had this impulse to kiss her… passionately. ‘WHY THE… THE FUCK… DO I FEEL LIKE THIS?! IT’S WRONG!’ my conscience roared at me.

Twilight was leaning into me, her chest pressed against mine as she closed the gap between us. Her eyes slowly closed as did mine. My body moved almost instinctively as our faces neared.

She was so close now… I could feel the breath from her open lips. Our lips connected in a kiss… but it wasn’t brief, nor just any regular kiss. Within seconds, I felt her tongue enter my mouth.

I was about to suck in for a deep breath but couldn’t. Instead our tongues began to dance inside our connected mouths. Twilight pushed her tongue deeper into my mouth. I thought briefly that she might perhaps trigger my gag reflex but instead my body just continued on like nothing was wrong… when in fact several things were wrong… I was tongue kissing with my mother!

My body moved slightly from underneath her as my arms slid up her sides and locked around her back. A gentle moan left her throat and entered my mouth. I let out a choppy exhale, which sounded more like a faint grunt.

Her forelegs travelled up and down my sides, further amping up the feeling inside me. In an instant, I realized that I was heavily aroused by the act, and my ragingly stiff boner left no honest denial to that fact.

My back arched, driving my bare chest further into her furry coat. The sound of our kissing didn’t travel far, but anyone within a few feet of our position could hear us. Twilight began to moan more excessively, and I returned it with grunts of arousal. I had no idea where this was headed… but I wasn’t sure if I wanted to know… goddess this was so wrong… but… my body yearned for me to continue.

“Twi? Evan?” asked a heavily accented southern voice. My heart began to race out of control as I leapt up, Twilight flinging off me as her wings splayed wide for her to take flight.

“GAH! AHH! Applejack?!” I gasped in absolute fear. I was praying to goddess she didn’t know what was fully going on. “I… we uhh… it doesn’t…” I stuttered fearfully. ‘Oh please goddess, don’t let her tell anyone,’ I prayed that if she knew, she would keep it secret.

“Uhm… Ah ain’t interuptin’ nothin’ am ah?” she asked curiously. My heart was still racing as I stammered out an answer, Twilight landing beside me.

“No! Nothing. We uhh… we were just… well, you know?” I could barely put together a sentence. ‘What would ponies think of me? Doing that with my own mother, it was taboo!’

“Uh… well… ah was actually out lookin’ fer yah. Just got a big shipment of apple seeds. Applebloom’s out gallivantin’ again, an Mac ‘n’ ah could use an extra hoof… err, in yer case, a hand,” Applejack informed me, seemingly unknowing of what was happening between us.

I looked to Twilight, who was equally as nervous as I was, her chest expanding and deflating almost as fast as mine. “Sure AJ, I’d love to give a helping hand.” I looked over to Lassie, who was still squirming in my coat.

I quickly rushed to her side and untangled her. Grabbing my shirt, socks, boots, and hat, I slipped them on respectively then grabbed my coat. It was rather hot today, and having my coat would prove impractical.

“Uhm… hey Mom, if you get around to doing laundry today, can you wash my coat?” I asked, my heart still racing and my breath trembling. She nodded with a short inhale.

“Yeah… yeah, of course,” she replied back, still somewhat nervous like I was. Lassie barked at me, then looked to my mother and began prancing circles around her hooves, obviously wanting to go with her.

“Okay… uhm… I’ll be home later… love you,” I told my mom, leaning over and giving her a peck on the cheek. I adjusted the collar on my shirt and began to follow Applejack towards the family farm.

“So why is it… that yah didn’t have yer boots, yer socks, an’ yer shirt on?” she asked curiously.

“Oh… that… ah-heh-heh,” I laughed nervously, coming up with the most reasonable lie I could think of. In hindsight… I know it’s not good to lie to others, but… it’d be more preferable than saying I was tongue wrestling with my mother.

“Well, last night we went out for supper, but it got late really fast… err… well, we lost track of time and it slipped away on us. So on our way back we ended up passing out in the field. I don’t like sleeping with my shirt on because it chafes my neck, and I like to let my feet have fresh air so I don’t wear socks while I sleep. Then later in the night, I woke up and noticed my mom was shivering and cold, so I gave her my duster coat because it was warm… then this morning Lassie was licking my face and we began to play together and my mom woke up and said my coat smelled bad, but then she started playing with Lassie and me. Anyway, I trapped Lassie in my coat, but Twilight tackled me from the side and began to tickle me and then…” I trailed off.

“And then what?” Applejack asked, wondering what happened next.

“Well… then you showed up and surprised us. And now we’re walking to the barn to unload apple seeds.” I lied… well… it wasn’t a lie really, I just left out the part about making out.

“Ahh… ah see. Well, thanks fer offerin’ tah help. Means a lot,” Applejack thanked me with a tip of her hat.

“Oh, it’s no problem. Everypony needs help sometimes,” I replied and Applejack swayed her head from side to side.

“Well… it’s not that we ‘need’ help… it’d just make the day go along smoothly,” she told me, somewhat stubbornly. I chuckled.

I raised my arms in defence. “Well okay then. Let me rephrase that. Everypony likes help every now and then.” With that said, we both let out a laugh. Stubbornness is a virtue… I think.

We arrived at the farm soon after, and immediately went to work. So it turned out the apple seeds were already unloaded, and we had to load them onto a seed drill that Applejack opted to pull.

Several other ponies were out in the fields pulling spreader wagons also. Despite being primitive compared to my old world’s seed drill, they were kind of fascinating to watch. The machine basically sprinkled out apple seeds onto the cultivated ground. It actually got me wondering how they worked without a tractor PTO...

Applejack assigned Mac and I to load the drill with the seeds, having to pour them from bags. I quickly started loading up the machines, the farm having several extra… speaking of which… why the hell hadn’t I seen these before… there were so many of them…

Maybe they belonged to the other ponies, seeing as how the family barn was still burnt kindling and but a mere pile of ash. Although it did look like the family was in the process of rebuilding it.

Bag after bag, I poured seed into the seed spreading wagon contraption. After a slight while, I realized I was heavily outpacing Mac. I nudged him as I walked past with a heavy bag heaved over my shoulder. “Hey Mac, ah don’t wanna do all the work, eh,” I teased him.

“Sorry,” he apologized truthfully.

“Woah! Mac, chillout man. I was just kidding,” I laughed. He looked to the ground and rubbed his hoof around in circles.

“Oh… eeyup…” He trailed off, almost in a saddened voice.

“Hey bud… I was just joking around. Sorry if I offended you,” I apologized, setting a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“It’s alright… it’s just that… ah ain’t the best at loadin’ wagons. Applejack thinks ah am just cause ah’m bigger, but… ah ain’t good at carryin’ things,” he informed me. I looked to the wagons. Ponies not having hands gave me an advantage over them when it came to lifting things.

“Tell yah what Mac. Hook up to one of those wagons and I’ll handle the seeds,” I offered and he looked to me with a shocked face.

“But…” He trailed off as I wiggled my fingers.

“I think I can handle it,” I offered and he nodded, knowing full well that I could load wagons faster than they could unload them.

As soon as he was harnessed to a seed drill, I went back to work, heaving around bags and filling the machinery with seed.

* * *

Canterlot Royal Castle,

Twilight’s perspective…

This was rather… bad. Actually, it was embarrassing. It wasn’t quite here yet, but… I could tell I was rounding the corner for a heat cycle… oh goddess, this was going to be embarrassing.

I pushed the thoughts from my mind. I needed to speak with Celestia about what to do with Evan. He was technically my faithful student, and I had been neglecting his studies ever since he launched that blast wave last time we practiced magic. I decided to perhaps ask Celestia about what I could do with him, and it might be a good way for me to get my estrus off my mind.

I entered the royal throne room, trotting with a half-regal pace up to Celestia and giving a slight bow, not wanting to expose my needy nethers for all to see. Celestia gave a gentle laugh. “Please Twilight, there is no need to bow to me anymore,” Celestia told me and I nodded in return.

“I’m sorry Princess… it’s just natural,” I apologized in a stammering tone. She gave a smooth laugh and nodded as she arose from her throne and trotted to my side, leading me towards the exit of the throne room.

“Please, come with me, we can talk as we go,” Celestia informed me. I followed her lead, hoping she couldn’t smell my wet vagina that was all too obvious… maybe I should’ve taken a longer shower.

Celestia spoke and interrupted my thoughts. “I received your letter, but it was rather… bland. What seems to be the problem, Twilight Sparkle?” Celestia asked, levitating out my letter to read.

All it said was ‘Dear Princess Celestia, I need to speak with you. Yours truly: Twilight Sparkle.’ I guess in my rush and needy urges, I didn’t piece together my letter very well. But at least Spike had sent it before going to play with Sweetie Belle.

“It’s about Evan…” I trailed off and she nodded before speaking.

“Ah yes, your faithful student. How are your lessons with him proceeding?” she asked and I let out a deep, ashamed sigh.

“Not well… not at all actually. I haven’t taught him anything since that energy wave he launched,” I admitted and she stopped.

“Nothing at all? I thought perhaps you’d be one of the greatest teachers of friendship,” Celestia replied and my voice staggered a bit.

“Well… it’s not that he hasn’t been learning friendship… far from it. I meant to say, I haven’t been teaching him anything about magic lately.” I blushed slightly, not from my embarrassment, but from my inner feelings for Evan. Could I confess my emotions to Celestia? Would she be able to help me? Could she help me? I had never seen her or even heard of her in any sort of relationship outside family ties.

Celestia smiled and patted my shoulder. “Dearest Twilight, sometimes the magic of friendship can conquer all other forms of magic… I’m sure you’ve accounted this first hoof,” Celestia assured me. I nodded. I sucked in my gut and prepared myself for what might come. I needed somepony that wasn’t a dog to give their opinion about a relationship with Evan.

“I have something else… something I need to speak with somepony about and-“ I was cut short by a mare who approached both of us. She was of regular size and wore a brown fedora and finely tailored suit jacket.

Her fur was of regal elegance, nearly matching Celestia’s and putting Rarity’s to shame. Her mane was partly matching, mostly white, but it had streaks of gold in it that looked natural and not dyed. Her eyes were a golden hue that gave her an even more elegant look.

“Princess Celestia,” she said with a most graceful bow, completely ignoring me, which was actually fine by my standards. I still wasn’t comfortable with others treating me with such grace.

“Ah yes, Inspector Keyes.” Celestia smiled brightly then turned to me. “I apologize, Twilight, but I must cut our conversation short. I have urgent business to attend to,” Celestia informed me. I went to interrupt, but a shiver went down my spine as this ‘Inspector Keyes’ fellow, glared at me with a cold stare.

My gut twisted and my tongue felt like it had become entwined with itself. I nodded and bowed to my former teacher as she did me. With that, she proceeded away with that other mare. “So what have you learned?” Celestia asks the other mare, having completely forgotten about me.

‘I don’t like her,’ I thought silently to myself about that other mare. I wasn’t usually one to judge too quickly, but I just didn’t like her… just the atmosphere around her was… I don’t know…

From the corner of my eyes, I spotted somepony slinking through the shadows and after Celestia. I was about to yell out a warning when I saw that he had a detective’s badge pinned to his black trench coat.

I nearly screamed in shock from the sight of his face. The right side of his face was all but a burnt, hideous scar. All that was left on the right side of his face was his eye that looked sucked in and a small part of his lips. His cheekbone and jaws were exposed along with part of his muzzle bone.

Regardless of his hideous looks, his other side looked compassionate and sincere. No doubt he was some kind of investigator as well… though why he was sneaking through the shadows I would never know.

I began my way back to the train station. ‘GREEAAAAAAT!’ I thought to myself. ‘This whole trip and all I get from it is something I already know. The magic of friendship is powerful. If I had been more gutsy, I would’ve immediately brought up the topic of Evan.’ The thought of him made my lower region shiver. This… was going to get embarrassing when I got home…

* * *

Sweet Apple Acres,

Evan’s perspective...

The day progressed, and several times I just wanted to call it quits. The ponies could really move ,and at times it was rather hard keeping up, but I kept on working. Finally… and I mean FINALLY, the day came to an end. The seeds were all planted and we had used nearly every bag, having only three extra, which Applejack stated was to compensate for if there was an accident.

I flopped back against the wheel of a wagon and sighed as I looked to the sunset. My body was tired… exhausted… and I was ready for a nap. I cradled my hands behind my head and leaned back.

The air was still warm, and I felt little to no discomfort as I started to doze off. As I started to pass out, a presence sat beside me. My nostrils picked up the scent of Big Mac… though I shouldn’t have been able to tell it was him just by smell alone.

I let a smirk cross my face. “Howdy Mac,” I whispered tiredly.

“Howdy,” he replied back in his thick southern accent. I kept my eyes shut and smiled a little more, showing off my teeth slightly. “No offence… but yah look like a werewolf,” Mac laughed heartily.

I reached into my mouth and felt both my canines. They were a little larger and more defined than they used to be… but not all that different than usual… then again, ponies didn’t have canine teeth so maybe that was what he was hinting to.

“Mmm… yeah… I’m a wolfy…” I gave a silent chuckle then turned to look at him. “Come to watch the sunset with me? I’ll spoil it for you. They’re overrated,” I laughed and he tilted his head to one side in slight confusion.

Turning back to face the setting sun, I snickered to myself. “A long time ago… I went to watch a sunset with just me, myself, and I… and it was a waste of thirty minutes. Just a big orange sun setting in the distance… though it did look cool when it set behind the trees and the light shimmered through the openings in the forest,” I told him.

“Oh… well… sorry tah ruin yer hopes of watching the sunset together, but that’s not why ah came out,” he teased and I just smiled. “The family’s havin’ dinner together, an’ AJ wanted tah know if yah wanted a plate,” Mac said. I rubbed my already closed eyes.

“Nah, it’s okay. Thanks for offering, but I ain’t part of the family,” I replied and he chuckled.

“Well yah sure work like yah are. Maybe yah aughta come in an just say hello. Lotta the family appreciates the help yah been givin us, specially AJ,” Mac informed me and I dipped my head forwards. I really just wanted to take a nap.

My stomach grumbled, informing me that I was rather hungry. I’d hate to say no to such a generous offering, considering I was in the mood for it. Though considering how many ponies were here today, I wasn’t sure what the supply for food might be like… would adding one more mouth to the mix hinder things?

I licked my dry lips, also realizing that I was parched. I reached for my water bottle, only to find it empty. “Ugh!” I groaned in irritation. Mac chuckled.

“We’ve got lots of water inside, iffen yer up to it,” Mac offered. I swirled the empty bottle in circles, looking into it and wishing it full again, alas, to no avail.

“You have something a little more tasty?... pop?” I asked, but he shook his head.

“No… no soda pop. But lots a apple juice. Yer mighty welcome tah stay fer dinner.” Mac stood there and I sighed. I guess… seeing as how they offered… I could stay for a little while, at least to get something to drink and say hello. I didn’t really want to intrude.

Mac led me to the house and I promptly removed my boots before entering. He looked down at my feet, which were still encased by my socks. Wiggling my toes, I snickered. “See anything interesting?” I asked laughingly and he shrugged.

“Just strange. Ah never really thought yer… uhm… hooves were shaped like that… ah mean with the ends that could move and all,” he replied, and then proceeded inside with myself following.

The residence was packed. Ponies, mostly all earth ponies, flocked inside the home, all conversing with one another. “Wow… full house eh?” I muttered. Mac nodded and led me towards the kitchen area where somepony had devised a buffet styled counter.

There wasn’t a wide variety, but a large quantity of food. Most of the food was just apples, crafted into different meal settings. Apple slices, apple salads, apple sauce, apple sandwiches, apple juice… just plain apples.

I grabbed a paper cup and poured myself a serving of apple juice. Giving Mac a nod, I headed for the door. This place was just too packed. On top of that, a lot of ponies were staring at me… I suppose due to the fact they had never seen anything like me before.

“Leavin’ so soon?” Mac inquired, but I shook my head.

“Nah, I’ll just be out on the front porch. It’s too crowded and hot in here for me,” I informed him, making my leave. Mac almost instinctively followed me.

I sat on the steps of the porch, sipping away from the cup of apple juice. “Yer a good worker,” Mac commented and I nodded. “Dun know many ponies that can really put their back into it an not complain.” Mac continued appraising me. I snickered softly.

“I’m used to it,” I informed him, then thought back on what I had just said. “Well… that is to say, I used to do this sort of thing.”

“Oh. What did yah used tah do?” he asked and I chuckled.

“Well… my original plan was to hit up the military right after high-school, when I was eighteen…” I trailed off with a sigh and he picked up.

“So did yah serve in yer world’s… uhh… military?” he asked and I shook my head. “Why not?”

I looked to him with a slight smile. “I got stuck on a farm.”

“What do yah mean… 'stuck'?” he asked wonderingly.

“Well… that’s a long story,” I informed him and he smiled.

“We’ve got all night… lessen yah don’t wanna talk ‘bout it,” he offered and I smiled.

“Well…” I began. “I suppose… back in grade eleven… which would’ve been… oh jeeze… I guess about… 2012? I was doing this education thing through the school where I worked on this military base called CFB Borden. Anyway, I really liked it, and there was this warrant officer that said I should really look at joining the infantry. Said: Don’t take this in a bad way, but you’re a yes man. No matter what I ask you to do, it’s always ‘Yes sir’ and that’s exactly what the military wants. Basically I was a good jarhead… I also met a few high ranking military base guys and impressed them, a major and a colonel… or maybe it was two majors… well, anyway, they said if I joined, they’d sign my reference papers, said it would be a guarantee for me to get in, all I had to do was finish high-school,” I informed Mac and he raised a brow.

“So what happened?” he asked, enticed by my story.

“Well… my one teacher, Mr. Smith, or as I called him, Smitty, talked me into taking a second co-op placement at Borden, since I had done so well the first time and they wanted me back… free labour I guess.” I stopped and laughed a little.

“Anyway, I took night-school for the longest time so that I could finish my schooling with a co-op at base, and about four weeks prior to my placement…”

* * *

Mid-January, 2013…

I wiped my smutty face as I stood underneath the Japanese import car, the vehicle itself being supported by a lift hoist. I tried in vain to reach the stupid oil filter, but my bulky size wouldn’t allow my arms to reach in between the tiny allowances obviously meant for much smaller people.

“Goddamn imports…” I muttered to myself.

“Evan?” a rather fragile, old voice asked. I looked over to my side, seeing Smitty with a clipboard.

“Howdy Smitty,” I said in a slightly pleasant voice as I tried to wipe grease from my face, only achieving to smear it more.

“Can I talk with you?” he asked and I shrugged.

“I dunno… I guess,” I replied and he ushered me out from under the vehicle.

“What can I do yah for, Smitty?” I asked and he was rather emotional as he spoke.

“Can I ask you what you’re doing after school? Are you very busy?” he asked and I shook my head.

“I do two-thirds a sweet fuck-all,” I stated immaturely.

“Oh Evan, oh it’s just the most terrible thing. Oh it’s horrible. Oh it’s-“ He continued on talking about how something was awful… without actually telling me what that thing was.

“Okay… so what happened?” I asked.

“Oh Evan. A local farm needs help. The father is passing away and the son broke his ankle. Two of the other employees left last fall and poor Jay is doing everything!” he exclaimed.

“Okay,” I replied casually, waiting for him to continue.

“Oh Evan… do you think you could lend them a helping hand until they get back on their feet?” he asked, almost as if he thought I’d say no.

“Sure,” I stated, and then went to get back to work on the Jap ricer.

“Oh Evan, you don’t know how much you’ll be helping them out,” Smitty continued, almost as if I had said no.

“I’ll help, Smitty,” I stated again.

“Oh, it wouldn’t be for very long. Just long enough for them to get rolling again,” he continued and I rolled my eyes.

“Smitty… I’ll help.” I tried being clearer, but I wasn’t sure if he understood me and just chose to continue rambling or…

“Oh Evan, you’re-“ I cut him off.

“Okay Smitty! Jeez man, I’ll probably get the same speech from them,” I said and he nodded with a smile.

“Oh Evan, you’re such a good person and-“ I quickly cut him off before he started rambling again.

“Smitty… man, listen, we’ll talk later, but right now… I gotta finish this car, okay?” I stated in a very calm and relaxed voice. He nodded.

“Okay, I’ll show you where the farm is after school,” he offered and, with that, he left. I let out a sigh… that man just had a way of rambling on forever, especially when it wasn’t needed.

* * *

Mid-February…

So it wasn’t too bad. When Smitty said it was going badly, I figured the place was in rough shape. Instead it was just a family matter. I already knew Jay from beforehand, and we were good friends, so we always kept each other company… though he was rather cruel to the cows, kicking them when they twitched or smacking them hard when they tried to nose at him… but he said that’s what you’re supposed to do.

“Man… I can’t take it here any longer. Scott is such a dog-fucker,” Jay cursed to himself as we shoveled shit from a box-stall.

“Well… so? Dude, you have to stay here. I’m just temporary, remember?” I said and he cursed to himself.

“Well… fuck it. I have to do something with my life. I can’t be stuck here the rest of my life!” he exclaimed and I just shrugged.

“Dude… you’re my age… working… and you have that Ram 2500. I think you’re doing pretty good,” I replied but he just scowled to himself.

“Yeah… well I’m sick of being Scotty’s bitch while he goes and fucks around all day!” Jay hissed.

That night he gave his ‘two weeks’ notice to the parents of the farm, but not to Scotty. For whatever reason, he was pinned against him in some sort of power struggle… despite not actually having a stake in the farm.

At the end of February, he dropped his hours off to the parents, despite the dad still being on his deathbed, then left with his paycheck.

At the beginning of March, Scott, the son, came to me in a plea, saying that he needed someone to be ‘his main man’ and that I was the best person he could think of. So I explained that I wanted to go to the military and he promised that he was planning to build a new barn that had a robot do all the labours… and at that point I’d no longer be needed and I could go to the military, but until which time, he needed my help…

* * *

Present day…

“And so that is how, in a matter of a month and a half, I went from just some random volunteer helper to a lead farm hand, and coincidentally, the only farm hand,” I finished with a chuckle.

“So what happened after that?” Mac asked, interested as to what happened next.

“Well… he was supposed to get his barn in the fall, but I helped him until last September… then I got zapped here… guess I never kept up my end of the promise…” I tried to laugh, but got choked up a little.

I kinda missed the farm, now that I’m thinking of it. I wondered just what Scotty had done to replace me… and I wondered what his sudden thoughts were when he realized I was missing. At first he probably just thought I had gone out for a longer lunch… oh Goddess how I missed him.

A tear trickled down my face. Mac must’ve noticed. “Are yah… cryin’?” he asked sincerely, but I quickly forced a yawn and stretched.

“Kind of… tears come to my eyes when I yawn,” I lied through my teeth, but he read me like a book... the bastard.

“It’s okay. Yah don’t have tah lie tah me,” he offered, but I shook my head.

“Yeah, okay… yah bastard. I just miss the old farm sometimes. Nostalgia… I guess.” I looked out to the horizon. It was late in the evening now, and I should be getting home for a shower. “I’d stay longer, but it looks like you guys got yer han… hooves, full at the moment. Tell AJ I said hey.” I gave him a nod, which he returned.

“She really appreciates all yah do fer us,” he told me and I smiled before leaving for home.

* * *

Twilight’s perspective…

Spike had come home earlier to gather some sleepover supplies. Apparently Rarity was leaving town for the weekend, and Sweetie Belle had invited him over for a sleepover, along with her other friends.

At the very moment, however, he was filling a bag with sweets from which I don’t know where he got… well, Evan probably bought them. I flipped the page on the story I was reading: Sixty-Nine Shades of Neigh.

I had pulled up a magazine over the cover of the book to make it look like I was just browsing through useless things, but in reality… oh goddess, I could feel the urges burning in my loins. This was awful, or as Rarity would say: the worst possible thing ever. These urges were just unbearable.

I continued reading in my head. ‘His mouth presses against my lower lips, his tongue slithering inside of my folds like a snake.’ I stopped reading for a moment as my right hindleg tensed up, my body aching for sexual pleasure.

I told myself I’d have to wait for Spike to leave; it’d be to strange for him, his mind was still young and fragile. Looking back down to the story, I continued my progress. ‘His mouth moves up slightly, and he starts suckling gently on my clit. I squeak in ecstasy. ‘Is it good?’ he asks slyly, already knowing the answer. I go to reply, but he flicks my clit with the tip of his tongue, forcing a squeal to leave my mouth.’

I place a marker tab in the story and quickly close it. If I don’t stop reading, I’d start to lose control right here. My lower region is already tensing up. I took a deep breath and held it slightly before releasing it in a gasp.

Spike must’ve heard me, because a question was tossed my way. “Twilight? Are you okay?” he asked in a slightly concerned tone. I shook my head but then quickly nodded as if to correct myself.

“Yes! Yes of course, just…” I trail off into a faked yawn. “Long day,” I lied. His brow rose slightly, but he just rolled his eyes then proceeded back into the kitchen to pack more food.

I slipped my special book under the couch cushions before standing to stretch. I hadn’t noticed before, but I had become rather aroused from reading, and my needy lower region had become rather moist, leaving a damp spot where I had been sitting.

“Shoot!” I whispered, quickly flipping the couch cushion upside down so nopony would realize. My hindleg had the jitters. When this heat cycle hit, I could already tell it was going to be very…

“Maybe I’ll just go on a short vacation,” I quickly thought aloud. Before I could say another word, Lassie was barking happily at the door, scratching and further ruining the door’s furnishing. I’d have to teach that dog to learn how to…

The door opened and Lassie literally leapt onto Evan. He laughed and cupped her in his arms as she squirmed to try and lick his face. “OKAY LASSIE! AH-HA-HA! OKAY YAH GOT ME!” He laughed playfully as he knelt down, setting her onto all fours.

She zipped around and in between his legs, head poking out between his knees as she promptly began giving him more dog kisses… slobbery ones. He pretty dog eyes were gentle loving and genuine but... she was such a goon.

He laughed and held her head in place before giving her one kiss to the forehead, then finally stood up. Looking to me, he smiled. “Eh, I’m back…”He trailed off and lifted his arm, smelling his armpit. “ECH! I call the shower. Don't use the water,” he announced to nopony in particular.

He went to close the door, but then noticed Sweetie Belle trotting up to the library. “Eh kiddo! How yah doin?” he asked in a very friendly tone. She smiled brightly then replied to his question in her usual squeaky filly voice.

“Good, really good. Is Spike ready to go?” she asked and Evan just shrugged.

“Ah dunno, I just got home… here, come in for a second, take a load off kid,” Evan offered. Sweetie Belle simply smiled and accepted the offer. As Sweetie Belle passed by Evan, she held the end of her muzzle to block her nostrils.

“Eww… you stink… SORRY! I didn’t mean to say it like that,” she apologized sincerely, but Evan just laughed.

“Oh it’s okay kid. I know, I just got off work.” Evan scratched his sides just as Spike was coming into the living room, a knapsack in his claws. “Hey Spike, you ready to go?” Evan asked and Spike was confused at first by the question, but then saw his young filly friend and knew what he was referring to.

“Almost, I just need a pillow,” he informed his friend, dropped his knapsack, and then quickly raced up to his room.

Evan turned to Sweetie Belle. “He’s almost ready, he just needs a pillow,” Evan told her… almost as if he thought she didn’t hear him. I facehoofed, his immaturity and purpose lack of intelligence at times was so dumb.

Spike quickly returned with his pillow, then threw his knapsack over his shoulder. “I’m ready. See yah later Twi. Bye Evan.” He gave his farewells, but Evan stopped them short.

“You going camping?” Evan asked, but Spike shook his head.

“Nah. Sleepover. Rarity’s out of town and Sweetie Belle is having us over,” he informed him. By ‘us’ he of course meant the Cutie-Mark-Crusaders and himself.

“Need some money? For treats or a movie or something?” Evan asked willingly, pulling out his wallet and tossing Spike a Celestia bit. My jaw dropped. That was A LOT of money to give a young dragon and some fillies.

“UGH! THANKS!” Spike said, looking down to the bit which was worth more than… well, more than a weekend’s supply worth of treats. He quickly gripped Evan in a tight, brief hug, then rushed off with Sweetie Belle.

“Evan!” I scolded him. “That’s a lot of money to give to young fillies and a dragon,” I told him sternly and he just shrugged.
“Meh, they’ll make good use of it. Besides, you're just mad that he loves me more,” he joked. He… I don’t even know where he gets all this money and… point made, purpose lack of intelligence. “Well… I’m gonna go take a shower then… I’ll see where it goes from there,” he muttered without a care in the world, then proceeded to the washroom.

I let out a sigh. That man never ceased to amaze me with his… shenanigans. I flopped back down on the couch and levitated out my story again. Within a minute, I could hear Evan singing to himself in the shower, something about ‘Raining men’.

I just shook my head… the tune he sang it in was kind of catchy though. I opened my book to the page I was on and continued from where I had left off.

‘I squirm in his grip, his forelegs wrapped around my waist as his mouth brought me pleasure in which I couldn’t possibly describe. My moans leave my mouth in a whispered hush of ecstasy. My breathing is heavy, quick, but well-paced.’

I levitate my book in a magical grasp as my hooves lower to my loins. The intoxicating pleasure was just too much to bear. I needed release, and with Spike gone and Evan busy singing to himself, there was no better time than the present.

The very moment I began sliding my hoof against my moist lips, they became damp and slick. My breathing became louder as I let out a very subtle, but very sensual moan.

I continued reading as I pleasured myself with my hooves… and Evan’s singing in the background was kind of hard to ignore. ‘I feel a deep burning pleasure building pressure up inside my body. I felt as if my belly was filling with fluttery butterflies. My cries of pleasure became more evident as his tongue snaked deeper into my body, circling rings inside my wet love hole.’

My hoof started to move at a faster pace as I started to feel the same feeling that the mare in the story was feeling, but… I just wish I had somepony pleasuring me, rather than having to do it myself… I wished I was having an intimate moment with somepony, rather than just reading about it and masturbating to the thought…

My pleasure began reach its peak. I began to moan loudly, my tongue licking my lips as I neared my orgasm. As I neared my peak, I flipped over into a doggystyle position, my rump high in the air with my back arched downwards, almost as if presenting myself. My juices dripped from my pussy, staining the cushions with my love juices. Evan’s voice echoed out from the washroom at a higher pitch, continuing to sing that absurdly ridiculous song.

‘And she did what she had to do,
She taught every angel, to re-arranged the sky!
So that each and every woman…’

I was so close. I could nearly feel my orgasm washing over me like a tidal wave. Suddenly, without warning, Evan burst through the washroom door, a fume of dense steam following him, water dripping off his nearly naked body and a towel wrapped around him like a toga. He pointed out as if to announce something.

‘Could find her perfect GUY!
IT’S RAINING...’

I let out a shocked scream, cutting him off from singing. I was so embarrassed that he had just walked in on me masturbating in a very obvious pose. He stared blankly at me as I lay there, breathing heavily on the floor.

He blushed brightly. “Sorry, I… uhh… kinda got carried away and didn’t think you’d… well… I guess I was a little over-dramatic,” Evan apologized.

‘Wait! Hadn’t he just seen me… he had to have… unless… he was too busy singing?’ I let out a deep and somewhat relieved exhale. My urges started kicking into gear. All he had on was that simple towel… and all it would take to get it off was… he could be inside of me…

I forced the thoughts away. I couldn’t do that… it would be too strange for him… unless… he had gone rather far with me this morning so maybe he'd be willing to… “Evan…” I trailed off, having no idea how to approach this.

“Yeah?” he asked, completely oblivious to what I had just been doing when he charged out from the washroom. I bit my lip, now regretting not thinking of something to say.

A quick thought came to mind. “That toga looks nice,” I said, half wanting to slap myself in the forehead. He snickered and pulled on the towel a little.

“Nah. It’s not a toga. I just wrapped a towel up so I could look like a Roman god and sing about raining men,” he laughed then looked to me. “Sorry about scaring you. Maybe I shouldn’t be so obnoxious next time,” he apologized.

Lassie barked and yipped as she sniffed at his feet. She sat on her haunches then offered him her right foreleg, as if to shake paw. “Aww… thanks Lassie. You really think I look like Hercules?” Evan laughed, shaking her paw. Lassie gave a ‘woof’ as her answer.

He chuckled and his stomach grumbled. “Oh man… I’m hungry…” He trailed off and looked over to me. “I know we just went out last night, but… do you wanna go out again?” he asked.

I nodded feverishly. He smiled then proceeded downstairs. ‘Oh sweet Celestia that was close,’ I thought to myself. I suppose I could’ve just tried to have taken him right then and there. He looked devastatingly handsome like that. Showered and gleaming, steam around him… nearly naked… but I didn’t want him to just rut me… I wanted him to love and hold me, like I loved him… but is what I have love or was it just…

I let my thoughts wander as I trotted up the stairs to my room, my head hung low as I sighed in a depressed way.

* * *

Evan’s perspective…

I had no idea why I had this song stuck in my head… it was just so catchy. I continued humming the tune while I slipped on some new clothes. I looked to Lassie’s food dish. She almost never ate dog food and usually just lived off fine dining, which may or may not be good for a dog, I wasn’t sure.

“You know Lassie, eating too much pony food might not be good for you,” I stated and Lassie gave me a look like I was stupid. “I’m serious, maybe you should stay home tonight and just have kibbles. I don’t want you getting sick,” I offered my suggestion.

She just grumbled at me then whined like an adorable puppy, or... well, she was more like a young adult dog now. Jeez she grew fast. “Well… I don’t know Lassie, you might get really sick eating all this pony food,” I pleaded with her, but she just continued with the puppy dog eyes.

“Alright, fine!” I gave in rather quickly. I couldn’t win with those eyes of hers. She let out a happy and high pitched bark, exclaiming her victory. “Alright, alright… don’t be a sore winner… what should we eat?” I asked.

She sat down on her haunches and brought her right paw to her chin, thinking deeply. She opened her mouth to bark out an answer. “I think I’d like Italian,” she replied in a very feminine voice.

I let out a scream of shock as I jumped back. “WOAH! YOU CAN TALK!” I screamed, quickly backpedalling. I hit a weight stand and a heavy plate fell, cranking the back of my head and knocking me out cold…

* * *

Twilight’s perspective…

“MOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!” shrieked a rather feminine voice.

‘That… couldn’t have been Evan,’ I thought silently to myself. The voice screamed again. Something had to be wrong. I leapt up and rushed downstairs. I literally flew down the basement set of stairs and into Evan’s room.

He lay flat on his face, unconscious with a weight plate lying next to him. “OH MY GODDESS! EVAN ARE YOU ALRIGHT?!” I gasped.

“Yeah, he’s fine, he just needs an icepack,” came a voice from beside me. I looked to see Lassie. My eyes went wide.

‘Did she just… talk?’ I thought, a pale look on my face.

“An icepack… they’re square… cold… usually in the freezer… you put them on sore injuries?” Lassie stated in an inquisitional way. Blood rushed to my head and I fainted, my world going black.

* * *

Third person…

Lassie stood irritably by herself with the two unconscious bodies before her. “Seriously?! SERIOUSLY?! COME ON MAN!” she yelled out. “Cows and donkeys can talk… but OOHHHH! Goddess forbid that a dog talks and oooooh! It’s like… insanity or something… UGH!” she groaned to herself, her stomach rumbling with hunger.

She paced around, muttering curses to herself before flopping down on her flank. “I shoulda known this would happen… because you!” she yelled, pointing to the unconscious man. “You’re an idiot who is so dense that you could smash diamonds… and you!” she barked, now pointing to Twilight.

“You’re just as dumb as him. IF YOU LOVE HIM SO MUCH, SMACK HIM IN THE FACE AND TELL HIM! Don’t just stand there hinting it; tell him that from the depths of your heart, you want him to be your… oh fuck it, you two are hopeless,” Lassie swore.

She went to leave, but her lips curled in a smirk as a devious idea crossed her mind. “You two seriously need to get laid,” Lassie snickered to herself as she pulled Twilight up to Burdy. However, rather than put them face to face, Lassie spun Twilight’s body around and stuffed her face into Burdy’s crotch, then wrapped her foreleg over Burdy’s hip.

Then, taking the much heavier man, she placed his face right into Twilight’s soft, moist pussy, also flipping his arm over her hips. “Here, eat up,” Lassie quipped before she trotted upstairs.

“Man… those two are so dumb! Seriously!” Lassie snipped to herself, then began talking in a voice that mocked Twilight’s. “Oh! I love him so much and I want him to be my special somepony. I know he’s dumb as a brick, but I’ll just keep hinting to him that I like him!”

She then began talking in a tone that mocked Evan’s voice. “I’m big and strong but dumb as a brick and dense like one too… If a mare waved her pussy in my face and said she wants me to rut her, I’ll probably introduce myself politely!” She scowled irritably.

“HOW CAN YOU TWO BE SO STUPID!” Lassie yelled. A voice answered her.

“Who?” asked the voice, and Lassie turned to see Twilight’s pet owl perched near a window.

“Burdy… actually, both of them are idiots!” Lassie replied.

“Who?” the owl asked again. Lassie just sighed.

“Yeah… ha-ha… who to you too,” Lassie chimed, then trotted into the kitchen. Grabbing a box of cereal with her teeth, she stood on her hindlegs and grabbed the jug of milk from the fridge with her front paws, balancing herself back to the table but leaving the fridge door open.

Lassie chewed open the cereal box and shook some into her bowl. Fidgeting with the milk jug, she tried to pour herself a decent amount of milk to go with the cereal. However, without opposable thumbs, the jug slipped from her two pawed grip and smashed against the floor. She placed her elbow on the table and her cheek against her paw as she tapped the table with one of her paw digits on her free paw, looking at the wall with an irritated look.

“Oh for Celestia’s sake… seriously, how do ponies hold shit with one hoof?” Lassie asked herself before she simply poured her bowl of cereal onto the floor, mixing it into the milk. She hopped down and flicked away the broken pieces from the jug and began licking up her cereal and milk from the floor.

“Oh… how the great have fallen… I feel so undignified,” Lassie whined to herself. The owl flew into the kitchen and perched on the open fridge door. Flapping its wings, Owlowicious closed the door.

“Who-who,” the owl whistled and Lassie just scowled.

“Shut up… bird!” Lassie muttered to herself. The owl continued to hoot to her. Looking up, she saw that the owl had Burdy’s wallet. “YOU’RE A GENIUS!” Lassie proclaimed, trying to grab the wallet.

The owl pulled the wallet out of her reach. “HEY!” she exclaimed. The owl hooted at her. “It’s not stealing. He’d let me have some money. Hell, he gave Spike a thousand bits for a sleepover!” she shouted.

The owl hooted again. “Fine! We won’t spend a lot of his money,” Lassie said.

The owl hooted again and dropped the wallet. “Yeah sure, we’ll get you some beetles to eat…” She trailed off then thought silently to herself. ‘Ech… beetles… disgusting!’ Lassie held Burdy’s wallet in her jaws while she trotted out of the library, Owlowicious following in pursuit.

Author's Note

So, as always, he's a little piece from the next chapter so you can all ponder on it.

We set out the table for breakfast. I took a seat at one end of the table while Twilight sat across from me, and Lassie perched herself to my right. Lassie smiled. "Hey, this is kinda nice. We're all having breakfast together... like a family," she chimed. The warm sun basked in through the window. She was right, well almost. Spike wasn't here but it still was a nice feeling to have breakfast together like a family.

Chapter 28

Cntains Explicit content

‘Derreck was… is, my best friend…’

Saturday, May 9th, 2012,

Twilight’s perspective…

I awoke to the feel of… “Haaahhh,” I whispered out a hushed moan as a pair of wet lips suckled against my vagina. My legs tightened around the head of… “Oh sweet… ahh… Celestia,” I moaned, looking down and realizing it was Evan, in a very peculiar spot.

I noticed a bulge right by my cheek and gasped as I realized we were both in a very sexually placed position. According to the erotic novel ‘Sixty nine Shades of Neigh’ this position was called a ‘69’.

Apparently both ponies are… “Sssh,” I hissed out a whisper of pleasure as Evan continued to mouth my pussy. I cringed, my legs wrapping tightly around his head. This feeling… it felt great.

Both ponies, according to the story, were supposed to participate in something called ‘Cunnilingus,’ in which both users perform oral sex on one another. The only question I had was… why was Evan… “AHH,” I moaned a bit louder.

He wasn’t right into it, but his arms were wrapped around my waist as he continued eating me out, so to speak. As I was wondering earlier… why was he all of a sudden so intimate with me?

A sudden snore, stifled by my lower folds, answered my question. He was sleeping.

I vaguely remembered last night’s occurrences… something about him being unconscious, and then I fainted. But why were we lying like this? Another moan escaped my mouth as I felt his tongue brush up against my clitoris.

Squirming slightly, I eased off the tension my legs had around his head. My heat cycle was now just coming around, and I couldn’t stop myself; it felt so good. I did my best to keep quiet and tried not to wake him.

The bulge underneath his towel twitched slightly. My conscious told me not to, but my body’s natural urges forced away my better judgement. I gently pulled apart the lower toga folds.

I gasped from the sight of it. I had seen in several health study books what a stallion’s penis looked like, but this was so different. It was noticeably smaller, but what was strange was that it didn’t have a sheath like a stallion, nor did it have a different coloration like a stallion’s erection.

I gave it a gentle touch and Evan’s body stirred slightly. I immediately withdrew my touch. “Mmm…” I panted gently as his tongue slurped inside his mouth, brushing up against my crevice.

I wanted him so badly, but I didn’t want it to be like this. I wanted him to truly love me, not just a natural and rather primal urge.

My body quickly forced away my thoughts, telling me to touch it again. I licked my hoof to slick it up so there wouldn’t be so much friction. I gently rubbed my hoof against the top of his penis, but, as I did, a layer of skin was slid back, revealing a purple head.

“Maybe he does have a sheath,” I whispered to myself. I had never been this close to an actual penis before, and it was rather interesting. “Ahh!” I gasped as Evan tried to breathe through his mouth, creating suction on my vagina.

His snore was stifled. “How does he sleep through this?” I wondered. He had to feel something… there was no way he could… “Oooh!” I cooed, legs squirming as his tongue moved around inside his mouth, the tip running up and down my crevice.

I heard about blowjobs… apparently I was supposed to put it in my mouth and either suck or slide my head back and forth along his length, or both. I leaned my face forwards, but as I opened my mouth to encase him, his body stirred in his sleep, forcing me away in fear he may wake up.

As his body stirred, his grip around my waist tightened. My back arched as his tongue continued up and down my slit. His drool dripped down my wet pussy and mixed in with my fluids that were already accumulating.

“Oh… oh my goddess!” I moaned as he continued sleeping, his mouth offering me a pleasure that was beyond most things I had ever felt. I just wish that I didn’t have to do it this way. I wish this was something we could do together naturally.

“Ah…mmm!” I continued moaning. An irritating buzzing started flying around. I looked and saw a mosquito. I tried shooing it away, but it persisted. A building pressure in my belly took my mind away from the insect pest.

“Oh… oh my goddess!” I moaned as I started to build up for an intense orgasm. My right hindleg began to stiffen and jerk. Suddenly, without warning, Evan jerked violently, slapping the back of his neck as he awoke with fury in his eyes.

I let out a yelp of shock and I immediately took flight. He blinked several times and the look of anger quickly faded in his eyes. He brought his hand forward, flicking off a dead mosquito from his palm. His eyes fluttered as he shook off the daze he was in.

With a cluck of his tongue, and an estranged look on his face, he looked at me. “Morning mom… what are you doing down here?” he asked in curiosity. My breathing was still heavy as I was at the borderline of an orgasm.

“I-I-I…” I stammered, my eyes darting around for an excuse. My eyes quickly caught a glance of his morning erection, still at full mast. With my urges and my body tilting on the verge of an orgasm, I had the thought to just start riding his dick, scream his name while he filled my vagina with his manhood.

I began to nervously scratch the back of my ear with one of my front hooves. “Well… I uh…” With a gulp I quickly came up with a lie… kind of.

“Do you want breakfast, was all I was asking,” I blurted out, not properly piecing together a sentence. He licked his lips then clucked his tongue in bewilderment.

“Uh… ahem… huh? Yeah, uhh… right after I wash my mouth… I think I was drooling last night,” he muttered to himself. I noticed that my love juices were splattered all over his face.

‘Oh please goddess, don’t let him find out… this would be so awkward and embarrassing,’ I prayed silently.

He mumbled to himself as he licked my juices from around his lips. “Morning breath… kinda sweet actually… like honey…” He looked up to me. “Uh yeah… I could go for some waffles.”

I nodded as he proceeded towards the stairs on his way to the washroom, his erection still in full view. I shook my head in shame. “Twilight, what’s wrong with you… you shouldn’t do that to him. It isn’t right,” I scolded myself quietly.

Evan’s voice yelped from upstairs. “WOAH!” He gasped. I rushed up the stairs and saw him, staring with a pale look on his face towards the couch, where Lassie lay sprawled out and relaxing casually.

“She… it wasn’t a dream,” Evan whispered. Lassie looked over and pointed towards me with her index paw digit.

“Yo, what’s shakin’ momma?” Lassie asked in a very suave voice. I nearly fainted, then remembered last night’s occurrence. I had rushed downstairs and…

“How can you talk?” I asked and she shrugged.

“Same way you do. I open my mouth, my tongue moves appropriately, and words come out,” she informed us both.

“But… dogs can’t talk,” I countered and she shrugged.

“Well why not? Cows talk, donkeys talk… so what’s wrong with a dog talking?” she asked. I gulped… this was… implausible… impossible… insane!

“Woah… that’s crazy… Lassie can talk,” Evan muttered as he paced into the washroom.

As Evan shut the door, Lassie looked to me. “So… had a bit of the ‘bow chicka wow-wow’?” Lassie asked and I raised a brow. “You know… a little bit a ‘hubba-hubba’?” I shook my head.

First off… I wouldn’t tell anypony what just happened, and secondly… I don’t know if I felt sane talking with an animal. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I replied. She laughed.

“Well, your cunt is dripping wet, and his mouth had pussy juice on it, and I left you two in a sixty-nine…” Lassie quipped.

'LASSIE! That's why we were positioned like that!' I thought to myself. This wasn’t how she usually acted… why was she being so vulgar all of a sudden? “Lassie… why are you acting like this?” I asked and she shook her head.

“Two reasons actually. Firstly… the sexual innuendo between you two is really starting to annoy me. Either you’re his mom or you’re not. Don’t try to play both, it's just gonna mess him up more. Secondly, I’m in heat, but unlike you, I can keep my urges in check,” she informed me.

“I… I…” I stammered on my words, unable to think of what to say. “Evan loves me,” I told her, having no idea how that would help my argument. She just rolled her eyes.

“You know what? You love him, but you’re too shy to tell him straight. And you’re just hoping that everything turns out, right?” she asked. I blinked, unable to think of something to counter. “Well I got news for yah, princess. With him, you’re not gonna just hint at it all the time and hope he catches on. He’s dense as a mountain and built like one too… and you’re not the only one that likes him. You have to make your move before somepony else does!” she scolded me. I swallowed deep. She wasn’t very stern in her tone and was actually rather casual… but she was still lecturing me like a parent to a foal.

“And this… this…” She trailed off and started talking in a whiny and mocking voice. ‘I’m a virgin and I want our first time together to be special’,” she told me. “That attitude is gonna leave you alone and heartbroken because another mare is gonna pick him up,” Lassie quipped and I blinked.

“That… that’s personal information,” I said sternly and Lassie rolled her eyes.

“Oh let me guess… You’re going to say: I have had sexual intercourse before with a stallion,” Lassie chimed and I gulped. She had me cornered and I couldn’t think of an appropriate lie. “News flash princess… nopony who has had sex says that. They say something more like…” She trailed off and pawed the power button on the TV remote.

An explicit channel turned on, showing a mare bouncing on top of a stallion, riding atop his fully erect penis. The mare screamed in a pleasured tone that was rather loud. “Oh yes… oh… buck my pussy,” she moaned.

I quickly grabbed the remote from Lassie’s paws with my magic. “How did you get that channel? I had it blocked!” I announced as I turned off the TV. Lassie merely shrugged.

“I called the cable colts and had them unlock it,” she replied with ease. I bit my lip. She was acting out terribly, like some spoiled teen filly. But perhaps that’s because Evan always spoiled her rotten.

Lassie sighed as she leaned back, one of her paws rubbing against her swollen vulva as her tongue rolled out from her mouth and her face eases into a look of pleasure. “Listen princess… Evan is a great guy, but he’s fragile. Sure, he might be built like a brick shit-house, but he’s lived a screwed up childhood and he isn’t all there. He's got a few screws loose. You know, there’s a reason he thinks you’re his mother, and it’s not because he actually truly believes you’re his ‘real’ mother,” she told me.

“What do you mean?” I asked. Lassie sighed as she got up off the couch, a stain of her vaginal fluids on the couch where she had be masturbating… and judging by the size of the stain, I’d say she’d been masturbating for a while.

“Well… you know princess, that's actually personal. I think it’s something you should talk about with your ‘son’,” she told me. I blinked and she made for the kitchen.

“Well… how do I bring the topic up?” I asked and she smiled a heartwarming smile.

“That’s for you as a mother to find out,” she said in a very gentle way, then looked to the ground with a frown. “I’m gonna leave you to it for a little while, and if you don’t get him by tomorrow night, I will,” she stated and I gasped.

“Lassie! You know I like him. Don’t say things like that!” I scolded her, but she just scoffed at my comment.

“Listen sweetheart. You’ve had forever to do this, and you’re still where you began because you’re too sheepish to try and advance… and you seriously need an ultimatum. Besides, I’m in heat, and I’d ride his dick so hard he’d moan my name while he blew his load inside me, and my pussy would milk every last drop of it.” She was so sexually vulgar it just wasn’t proper.

“I… you wouldn’t really,” I tried to counter and she nodded.

“I would really,” she replied and I bit my lip. I had barely a day and a half. How would I do this? Lassie went to enter the kitchen but stopped once more in mid trot. “I’ll stay outta your way and leave you to it. Just woo him… oh, and tomorrow is Mother’s Day,” she explained before entering the kitchen. Oh no… this was bad… I couldn’t let Evan’s heart fall to a dog!

* * *

Evan’s perspective…

I couldn’t make it go away. This stupid erection just wouldn’t leave. There was this smell in the library... I couldn't tell what it was but it just drove me right over the edge. I had taken a shower, but my dick just kept twitching the whole time. “Shit,” I muttered as I slipped on a pair of boxers.

I went to leave but spotted the Playcolt magazine that Cheerilee had given me, hidden beneath some digest magazines. I quickly picked it out and looked at the cover, an urge to jerk off pulsing through me.

I really shouldn’t, but… I sat down on the toilet and flipped through the magazine. There were several small stories about mares and their sexual encounters. I flipped through the magazine and found a picture of an absolutely stunning mare in a very peculiar pose.

She had her head tilted to one side and her legs spread wide. Her one front hoof was tugging at her flank cheeks, but her tail was whisked up and blocked the view of her genitalia.

Her eyes were closed and it looked like she was in some sort of sexual pleasure. Her mouth appeared like she was moaning or perhaps enduring an orgasm, I couldn’t tell.

I bit my lip and used my imagination as I began to jerk off. However, I quickly learned that, no matter how I did it, thrusting into my hand, or using my hand to jerk… or both… I couldn’t build up any pleasure and blow my load to effectively end this boner.

“Goddess dammit!” I hissed as I continued to try and rid myself of this erection. Through my frustration, I heard my mother’s voice from outside. I think she was in the living room. She sounded distressed about something.

I shook my head as I continued to jerk off, but as I heard her voice, my mind visualized her, then quickly visualized her in a sexy pose just like the mare in the magazine. I bit my lip and quickly stopped. ‘That’s wrong!’ I scolded myself, but the image was burned into my imagination.

Mac’s words of wisdom returned to me. “Whatever gets yah off,” I muttered irritably. I couldn’t believe I was actually going to do this, but...

I stood up as I started jerking off, fantasizing about my mother. I bit my lips as I imagined her to be right here in the washroom with me, bent over the sink and presenting her rump to me, her tail flicked up and to the side.

Her glistening pussy was dripping wet as it contracted with anticipation, ready for me to take her. “Take me son, rut your mommy,” she pleaded. My cock twitched just from the sound of her angelic voice.

I forced the thought from my head. I couldn’t seriously be fantasizing about this, could I? It felt so wrong, yet, the more and more I thought about it, the more I liked the idea of it.

I chewed a bit harder on my lower lip as the thought of rutting my mother returned. She wiggled her flank with a devious smile. “I want you inside me,” she cooed. My legs shook as I neared her rear.

Both my hands gripped around her flank. “Oooh, yes, give it to mommy. Straddle me like the naughty filly I am,” she chimed in a heavenly tone. I slowly leaned my hips forwards.

The thought of it drove the sensation of masturbation to a new height. I had an urge to actually ask my mother to do this with me. I grunted, forcing away the thought. Fantasizing about it was one thing; actually going through with it was another.

I huffed at myself in anger. I couldn’t believe I was still thinking about this.

My cock slipped into her slick pussy and I glided in with ease. Her back arched downwards as I slid into her. She moaned out in an blissful tone. “Oh yes, mommy loves you so much,” she cooed to me.

I grabbed her hips and began to slowly thrust myself in and out of her smooth, slick, heavenly vagina. “Ugh, mom,” I groaned quietly.

“Louder honey, I want you to scream my name,” she ordered me.

“Oh mom, oh you feel so good,” I said, actually saying it in real life. Her breathing picked up as she looked to me with semi-dazed eyes.

“Do you like mommy’s tight pussy?” she asked and I answered her with a grunt as I leaned into her. My body cradled over hers as I nestled my head into her neck. “Mmm, you feel so good inside me sweetie,” she whispered to me, panting with her tongue hanging out. Her hips started rocking against mine, the feel of her back rubbing against my stomach added to the pleasure I was enduring.

The pressure in my cock built up intensely to the point where I was just simmering on an-

There was a quickly knock at the door followed by it abruptly opening. The door was so close to the sink that I could nearly feel its frame passing my body, along with the body of the figure at the door. I gasped in shock, having been exposed and in the nude. “Wait!” I gasped but, as I turned, I struck my orgasmic point.

The first jet of cum sprayed out and launched towards the door. My spurt of cum laced my mother’s snout, just in front of her eyes, and my stomach twisted, ‘Oh my goddess,’ I thought, trying to push my cock down. I pushed my dick downwards, but, as I did, a second spurt of cum launched out.

Although a smaller amount, it still roped itself across my mother’s chest. ‘Oh for Celestia’s sake… I’m gonna be in so much trouble,’ I feverishly thought to myself. I finally managed to point my dick towards the ground, where my final few strands of cum launched. Some strung itself to the calves of my leg, the rest lacing the floor by my feet.

Twilight stood in shock. “Oh my goddess… mom I… I was… I thought you knew I was in here and… I uhh… I was uhh-“ I continued stuttering as I tried to think up of an excuse. I had this gut wrenching feeling that if I said ‘I was fantasizing about having sex with you,’ that the outcome would not be great.

She blinked then quickly rushed out, a blush on her cheeks, and the door slammed behind her. I dipped my head in shame. I was in a lot of trouble, I just knew it. Why the hell was I this crazed right now anyway?

The lingering smell of... whatever it was lingering around in the library that made me so horny, entered my nostrils, stronger than before.

I quickly took some toilet paper and cleaned the floor, and my leg, of my spooge. “Oh goddess, this is so embarrassing.” My gut lurched and I felt like I was going to puke. This was going to be an awkward morning breakfast.

I quickly wrapped my towel around my waist and quickly rushed down to my room and slipped on a pair of blue jeans and a white V-neck t-shirt.

I moseyed up to the kitchen, trying to think of what I could possibly say. ‘Mom, I’m sorry I was fantasizing about you then came all over your face and chest,’ I thought shamefully. I entered the kitchen with a hue of blush on my face. My mother was near the sink, her fur wet from washing off my cum. “Mom… I… I uhh… that-“ I was cut off as my mother interrupted me in a ramble of words, equally as embarrassed as I was.

“Evan, I’m so sorry I-I-I… well, that is to say that-“ Our words were just miss mashed together and we both quickly stopped. I spoke first.

“Mom, I’m so sorry. I was… well, you know… and I didn’t think you were going to come in the washroom,” I apologized and she swallowed.

“I should be the one who’s sorry. I knew you were in the washroom, and I should’ve asked if I could come inside rather than just enter.” We both stood in awkward silence.

Lassie sat on a chair at the table, her forelegs up on the table and holding a newspaper in front of her face. She quickly broke the strange silence with a completely different topic, which I was glad she brought up.

“What’s for breakfast? I could go for some waffles and milk,” Lassie said, not setting down the newspaper. The strange awkwardness soon passed as I looked to my mom and smiled.

“Well… I guess it’s waffles and milk, eh,” I said with a goofy smile. Lassie quickly chimed in, setting her newspaper down.

“Can you warm up my milk? I like it better that way,” she said and I nodded. I grabbed the waffles and quickly set them in the toaster. We could only do four waffles at a time, but that’d be alright.

Twilight quickly took out a glass pitcher and made some orange juice while, at the same time, she used her magic to set out three plates with corresponding utensils. I grabbed another plate and set it next to the toaster. As the waffles finished toasting, I’d set them on the plate and start making more.

Strangely enough, Lassie stood to her hindlegs and grabbed some cups. I had been a little surprised when I noticed that ponies could hold things in their hooves, but never once had I thought that dogs could grab things too.

She set out three glasses. “Who wants milk?” she asked and both Twilight and I looked to her. I was really feeling orange juice and I think my mother was as well. “Just me? Okay,” she said, pouring herself a glass of milk and setting it in the microwave.

The microwave had one of those see-through windows so you could watch it in action. “Ooooh!” Lassie said aloud in a sarcastically entertained tone as she watched her glass slowly spin around on the rotating plate.

The microwave binged within ten seconds, but she left the milk inside as she poured Twilight and I some orange juice and set it by our plates. I set the plate of waffles in the middle of the table, along with some syrup, and sat down. Lassie sat at my right side while my mom sat across from me.

Rays of sunlight entered through the kitchen windows and basked upon us, giving the room a warm feeling. Lassie spoke up and interrupted our silence. “Man, too bad Spikey wasn’t here. We could have breakfast together as a family,” Lassie said to us both. I nodded. Despite the terribly awkward occurrence not ten minutes ago, there was a calm and warm atmosphere right now… one that just seemed perfect.

We each took a share of waffles and began slicing them with our utensils. Even Lassie cut her waffles with an elegant grace, rather than just wolf them down. Grabbing the syrup bottle, Twilight poured herself a fair amount of syrup before passing it over to me, Lassie having not finished cutting her own waffles.

I poured myself a generous amount that was just enough for my waffles. With that, I gave it to Lassie whom poured an obscene amount, nearly flooding her plate with syrup. At one point, I thought her waffles might start floating. A memory came to mind and I laughed. Twilight and Lassie both looked to me.

“Oh sorry, it’s nothing. I just remember back in high school when people used to say I’d kick down a maple tree and suck the sap raw for breakfast.” With that, Lassie stifled a laugh and shook her head.

“Funny thing is… I'd believe that,” Lassie interjected, then pointed outside. “There’s some maple trees out there if you’d like to try,” she joked, much to the humor of us all. I began to fork pieces of syrup stained waffles into my mouth, chewing it up and downing it.

Much to my surprise, Lassie ate with an attempt to be civilized. Though after several minutes of struggling to use her utensils, she finally broke down and simply started licking the food off her plate.

I sat and ate with some sense of decent manners, though I would constantly lean my face down closer to my plate and just hoover pieces into my mouth if I couldn’t get them to stick on my fork.

Twilight simply used her magic to levitate her fork and eat her waffles with elegance and grace. ‘Wow… she’s pretty,’ I thought to myself, a beam of sparkly light gleaming down on her like a heavenly ray.

I quickly shook off the thought and realized it was just the morning sun gleaming through the window and the sparkles where just dust particles reflecting the sunlight… but she was beautiful. ‘Ugh, I have to stop thinking about her like that,’ I told myself angrily.

We all spent about a half an hour eating breakfast together, and like Lassie stated, it was really nice.

With that, we all simply set our dirty dishes in the sink, leaving them for later. I made my way up to the balcony and flipped out a lawn chair then leaned back in it, soaking up Celestia’s sunrays.

I suppose I should try and tan my body as a whole rather than leave my t-shirt on, but… meh. Several moments later, Lassie sat by my side, panting heavily as she leaned into my thigh. It was strange with her talking. Well, at least now she could easily speak her mind.

She plopped her head on my lap and I began to rub her head. “How’s it going Lassie?” I asked and she yawned.

“Pretty good actually. Could you scratch behind my ears?” she asked and I did just that. She let out a comforted sigh, still panting happily "Yeah, just like that." Another few seconds past and Twilight took a seat next to me. Things were silent… well, minus the town’s sounds echoing through the air, but it was still rather peaceful.

I began to close my eyes for longer durations of time. As I began to doze off, I began thinking of Derreck. I don’t quite remember the first time we met, but I remember the moment our friendship together really took off. I smiled slightly as I remembered that moment while I dozed off…

* * *

Summer 2002…

I was barely seven at the time, having just passed first grade. My mother had moved out of my grandma's house in the country and into the city, dragging me along with her despite my pleas to stay out in the country.

Not even a few days into living here, I began doing pretty bad things. I got involved with a gang of kids because… well, you were either with them, or not safe. We didn’t do really bad things like deal drugs or kill, but we still did bad things like smash stuff and vandalism.

Before this, when I lived in the country, I was a good kid. Hell, one would’ve called me a goody-two-shoes, but not any more.

I ran along frightfully, thinking to myself how much trouble I’d be in if that man chasing me caught me. That was a stupid idea to begin with, and I don’t remember why I chose to do it, despite only doing it a few seconds ago.

I ran into an open area that had a playground and two dumpsters that were surrounded by a seven foot wooden fence. “Oh no!” I gasped. I had nowhere to hide. No matter where I went, that man would find me. I could try to hop the fence that surrounded the dumpsters and hide in there, but by the time I managed to get over them, he’d have seen me.

The kid I knew as Derreck rushed past me, shocking me from his sudden arrival. Slapping me on the shoulder, he began pulling me along. “Come on dude, this way,” he said, bringing me over to the dumpster fence. You couldn’t quite see through it since the fence had some weird layer system to it.

The man’s screaming started to near the corner of the building I had just come from. In a matter of seconds, he’d be here… and I’d be in a ton of trouble. “Boost me up!” Derreck ordered.

“What?!” I gasped.

“Give me a boost!” he hissed. Without another word I did as he said, cupping my hands and boosting him over the fence. Derreck rolled over the top off the fence and fell down to the other side.

The man’s voice was just behind the corner of the building. “What about me?!” I gasped, thinking perhaps he had just left me to fend for myself. Suddenly, before I could even blink, he leaned over the top of the fence and reached down. I reached my hands up and jumped. He grabbed my hands, flung me over the top of the fence and into the open dumpster, which was full of smelly garbage.

Pulling me under some rancid trash bags, he put his hand over my mouth. “Sssh! Don’t say anything,” Derreck ordered and I nodded silently, fear in my eyes. The screaming and furious man started yelling closer and closer. Derreck put his finger to his lips, motioning me to be silent before lying next to me under some trash bags.

“Where’d you go you little fuckers?! When I get my hands on you, I’m gonna kick your fucking asses!” he roared. Through the clearances between the bags, there was a small crevice that I could barely peek through, and I looked up to the top of the fence.

“I know you’re around here you little shits! I'm gonna fucking rip you in half!” he yelled. Both Derreck and I lay motionless, trying not to breath. The man peeked up over the fence and I bit hard on my lower lip to make sure I didn’t scream.

If he somehow saw us, we’d be dead. The man looked then cursed before running off, still yelling. After a few minutes or so, we both got out from the dumpster, reeking of garbage.

“Whew! That was close. Hey, good job kid, almost thought we were screwed for a second there,” Derreck laughed happily.

I sighed a deep exhale. “I thought you were going to leave me behind,” I told him my thoughts from before, but he just shook his head seriously and gave my shoulder a loving punch.

“Nah, we’re like brothers man, and brothers look out for each other, always. No matter what.” I nodded and he smiled. “Hey man, we should chill again soon, you’re pretty cool.”

I nodded and sniffed myself. I reeked, but I wouldn’t be able to bathe until later. My mother had locked me out for the day and wouldn’t let me back in until dinner. “Man… I stink,” I muttered and Derreck smiled.

“It’s okay. Some guy down the street has his sprinkler watering his garden. We’ll just go wash off there,” he offered. I smiled with a nod.

“Okay,” I said happily. I was glad he had a plan because I previously had no idea how I’d get the smell off.

* * *

Present day…

I awoke with a gasp, sitting straight up and startling my mother. “Evan?! Are you okay?” she asked worriedly. I let out a few heavy and quick breaths before realizing it was just an old memory.

“Yeah, fine… just remembering old times,” I stated and she raised a brow.

“Scary ones?” she asked, but I shook my head.

“No, not really,” I responded and laughed, remembering that time. I don’t quite remember what it was I did to piss that guy off… but boy oh boy, if Derreck hadn’t been there, I’d have been in a shitload of trouble.

“What was it about?” she asked. I quickly gave her the rundown. “Wait… why would your mother lock you out?” she asked and I chuckled with embarrassment.

“Well… you see. I lived in an apartment building complex with three floors. And our apartment living quarters had four or five rooms. The kitchen, the living room, two private rooms, a bathroom, and the water heater room… so I guess six rooms. Anyway, my mother had all her marijuana plants in the water heater room and was like… I guess the drug dealer of our building. So when I wasn’t at school, she’d kick me out for the day and deal weed to the other people in the building. Basically they’d kick their kids out too while they went to my mom and bought weed, and because our building had a dumb security lobby the only way inside the apartment was to get our parents to buzz us in, or to try and get in through the patio doors, which they always locked,” I informed her.

“That’s awful!” she gasped and I just laughed.

“Yeah. It wasn’t a great neighbourhood to grow up in. It wasn’t a shitty slum, and some of the parents were actually pretty nice, but… a lot of them weren’t,” I laughed.

“So what about when there was bad weather?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“Well, in the winter time it wasn’t so bad because she’d let me stay inside… probably because the other parents weren’t smoking weed in their house during the winter. But in the summer time, unless it was a bad lightning storm, I’d probably be stuck outside until supper time. But at least it was fun to play in the puddles,” I informed her.

“A parent shouldn’t act like that,” she told me and I just yawned.

“Yeah, well… what can you do, right? At least with all the other parents kicking their kids out so they could get high, I had others to play with.” I smiled, those were some good times… despite the fact I was doing bad things.

“Can we change the subject please? I don’t think I want to hear about your mother anymore,” Twilight asked.

“But why not? You’re a great mommy,” I stated, leaning over and giving her a kiss on the cheek. She blushed, then shook her head, a tear forming in her eye.

“I meant your real mother. If you plan on having a child, you shouldn’t act like that,” Twilight said, despised with my real mother.

“Oh, well… I was actually an accident,” I stated and she raised an eyebrow. “Yeah… I don’t know what exactly happened, but I guess her and my dad didn’t use a condom when she was drunk… and didn’t know she got pregnant. So she was binge drinking and doing drugs and all that shit, then after about like… six months, she realized ‘Oh, I’m not getting fat, I’m pregnant’,” I laughed to myself as I shook my head. “It’s probably why I’m so screwed up,” I joked and Twilight gasped.

“You are not screwed up. You’re a wonderful person. And your mother… let’s just forget about it,” she stated and I nodded.

“I’ve been trying to do that for a long time, believe me,” I laughed. With a deep exhale, I shook off the thoughts of my real mother. She wasn’t always bad… but a severe majority of the time she was, leaving me scarred in more ways than one.

I smiled. “So what should we talk about?” I asked, trying to bring up a different topic.

“Just something else, please, anything else,” she pleaded.

“How about your parents?” I asked.

Twilight smiled. “Oh, they were good to me. They would sometimes go out for vacations and leave me with my foalsitter, but they always cherished me, loved me and…” She trailed off. “I’m sorry. It probably makes you feel depressed… me talking about my parents like that,” she apologized sincerely.

I shook my head. “No, please, go on,” I offered, leaning my head back and listening about what loving parents were like.

“Well… when I was rather young, they realized my potential and brought me to a special school meant specifically for talented unicorns. I almost flunked it, but… well, it’s a long story about what exactly happened. The short story is that a loud boom shocked me and I let out a blast of magic that stunned all who had seen it and impressed Princess Celestia herself. She then took me as her faithful student. After that, I started seeing less and less of my parents,” she informed me. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t ramble on like that,” Twilight apologized, wiping a tear from her eye.

Truth be told, we had only visited her parents the one time since I had come here. “I’m… it’s okay Twilight. I like hearing you ramble on. It’s beautiful,” I offered my peace of mind to her. She nodded.

Lassie suddenly pitched up. “You ever have a fillyfriend… or whatever it was back on your world?” she asked and I raised an eyebrow.

“What? Lassie, I already told you this story. Besides, it’s short, really short,” I told her and she smiled.

“I know, but I love hearing it,” Lassie replied. I rolled my eyes with a scoff.

“No. I never had a girlfriend. End of story,” I told her.

“Because?” she inquired. I knew she was toying with me. She already did this before.

“Because I didn’t, alright?” I told her.

“Because?” she asked, irritating me slightly.

“Because… I just didn’t, okay?” I told her.

Twilight pitched in. “Well… why exactly?” she asked, interested in the topic.

“Oh great… see what you’ve started Lassie?” I asked. I sighed, looking to my mother. “You really want to hear it? It’s pretty boring and short,” I offered.

“Is it painful memories? I wouldn’t want to do that to you,” she offered and I shook my head.

“Just boring. I just… never took an interest in a girl’s look alone. I was more of a… personality guy, if you will. A girl couldn’t just fluff her hair and flutter her eyes at me, then get me to do something for her like she could all the other guys. Problem was, I didn’t go looking for a relationship either, and all the girls around school just tried for looks, ‘cause that’s what all the guys went for. And the girls that did believe that beauty was more than skin deep … they were probably terrified of me. I guess I did look the part of a killer… shaved head, camouflage, didn’t talk much to others… a crazy,” I laughed.

“So… you’ve never… had a relationship before?” she asked and I shook my head.

“Nope, never,” I said proudly with a nod. “I suppose I could’ve with one of the girls that tried more for looks, but… bah, that wasn’t my style anyway,” I said truthfully.

“Did you ever have any girls offer?” she asked and I nodded.

“Well yeah, lots, but… I didn’t realize until one of my buddies would slap me upside the head and tell me she wanted my dick…” I trailed off with a chuckle. “But that’s okay with me. I take pride in being a virgin,” I told her and she raised an eyebrow.

“You do?” she asked and I nodded.

“Well sure. Most guys, if they could, lost theirs closer to grade nine, but I didn’t because I could keep it in my pants. Hell, I didn’t even masturbate…” I trailed off and furrowed my brow. “Which led to some pretty bad testosterone problems... But all these other guys were like, ‘Yeah I fucked this broad last night, blah-blah-blah,’ and I’d be like: Yeah well, I can keep it in my pants if a girl waves her ass in my face,” I said proudly. “I kinda believed it to be an achievement but… well, most everyone else didn’t.”

She blinked, I guess shocked by my statement. “I… I didn’t know you had that outlook on life,” she said, thinking to herself. “What do you think about relationships now?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Well… I don’t know really. I’ve never went and actively looked for a relationship… and when I first got here, the thought of relationships with a pony never even crossed my mind but… well, I don’t know. I suppose if a nice mare did come along, I might settle down… maybe. Ah, who am I kidding? I’ll probably live alone in the mountains with my dog, right Lassie?” I asked, scratching the back of her ears.

She panted heavily, slobber dripping off the end of her tongue. Twilight spoke up again. “Well, say you were looking. What would you be looking for exactly?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Oh, I don’t know,” I said, leaning back and closing my eyes. “They’d just have to be… nice, and really easy going in life,” I said, and that was that.

“Is that it?” she asked and I nodded. “Well… would she have to be really pretty?” I shook my head.

“Nah. In life, I set my standard bar really low and leave it there, that way I’m rarely disappointed,” I chuckled. It was a good take on life too.

“That’s it?” she asked and I nodded.

“Yeah, but that’ll probably never happen,” I offered and she was shocked by my comment.

“Why not?” I just rolled my shoulders in a shrug.

“Just because,” I said. She went to say something else but fell silent, probably realizing it was useless to ask why, seeing as how even I didn’t have the proper answer. “So how ‘bout you?” I asked.

“Me?” she asked and I nodded.

“Ever have any coltfriends?” I asked, but her answer took me by a bit of a surprise.

“No… not really. I had a crush or two when I was young, but they never went anywhere. When I was Celestia’s faithful student and a librarian, my social life was very small, if that,” she told me, then fell silent. “I did… have a harboring crush on Flash Sentry, but-“ I cut her off quick, remembering her father telling me how he played her.

“It’s okay. I know, your dad told me,” I said, then quickly bit my lip, hopping I hadn't crossed the line by accident. She nodded but continued on anyway.

“We flirted together and he led me on like he liked me too, but… then I found out he was already in a relationship… and I don’t want that to happen ever again,” she said in a depressed tone.

“Well, I hope you find a good stallion who will take care of you and love you. You deserve it,” I offered and she nodded quietly.

A memory resurfaced. “I remember a long time ago, I was at my cousin-in-law’s and his cousin was there. So I guess it would be like… my second cousin-in-law… anyway, she made it bluntly obvious that she wanted me,” I began.

“What happened?” Twilight asked, interrupting me.

“Well… basically she went on like: You know we’re not technically cousins, so it wouldn’t be incest. Stuff like that. So anyway, she had this boyfriend at the time, but about two hours into meeting me she told him it was over. I guess she figured that… well, I don’t know.” I laughed and Twilight looked to me.

“What happened between you two? I thought you said you never had a relationship?” Twilight asked and I nodded.

“I never did. I knew she was one of those girls that would screw over a guy the moment she met another one, so I played her on the whole night like I was interested, saying that I’d get condoms and stuff… then at like midnight, I was like: Yeah, it’s not happening.” As soon as I said that, Lassie laughed loudly, clapping her paws together in humor.

“Oh my goddess! That’s priceless! Oh, I bet she was sooo pissed!” Lassie commented, laughing all the while, and I nodded.

“Yeah… needless to say she wasn’t happy. The second time I was around, she was always giving me a cold glare and when I said hello, she responded with: Oh, I remember you, you’re that flaming fagot. You even dress like one.” I laughed and rolled my eyes.

“Oh my,” Twilight replied and I nodded. “I don’t know if that would’ve been the best thing to do Evan,” she told me but I shrugged.

“Well… probably not, but, like I said, she was one of those girls that’d screw over a guy the moment she met another one,” I replied and Lassie nodded.

“She sounds like a cunt,” Lassie added in and I just shrugged.

“Well, I remember her telling my cousin that her new boyfriend was ‘A real man' because 'He drove a big truck,’ and my cousin asked what kind of truck and she said a Ford Ranger.” I chuckled.

Twilight tilted her head to the side. “What’s a Ford Ranger?” she asked and I rolled my eyes.

“A car with a box on it…” I sighed and gave the vehicle its due. “I suppose they’re technically nice because they mix a fuel efficient four cylinder engine of a car with the ability to carry things like a truck… but they’re really small, and they're hard to fit into to,” I told her.

“Oh… I… I don’t really understand,” she commented.

“Well, anyway, she said that her new boyfriend was a real man because he drove a big truck… despite it being way smaller than mine. So my cousin said to her that my truck was way bigger and she said, ‘Well Evan’s just a faggot that needs to compensate’…” I trailed off, laughing to myself.

“What do you mean, ‘compensate’?” Twilight asked curiously, unfamiliar with the term.

“Well… I’m not sure exactly how it works, but apparently guys who have trucks are just compensating for their small penis size,” I informed her and she furrowed her brows.

“I don’t get it. How does that work?” she asked and I shrugged.

“I don’t know either, but… regardless, she hated me a lot after that night,” I said.

“What you did wasn’t the nicest thing to do, but I suppose if that’s how she acted, then it was bound to happen eventually,” she said. I rolled my eyes.

“Yeah, well… I wasn’t the greatest person back in the day,” I replied.

“The past doesn’t matter Evan. We can only learn from it, we can’t change it. I don’t know what you were like a long time ago, but you’re a good man now. And that’s all that matters,” she told me.

“Funny, I thought there was a story about you going back in time after a panic about the end of the world, then it turned out you were just scaring yourself trying to tell yourself nothing would happen,” I replied and she blushed.

“That’s not what I meant,” she mumbled and I laughed, then gave her a kiss on the forehead before lying back down and closing my eyes.

“I know what you meant, and thank you. It means a lot,” I said with a smile. Afterwards, despite not being an awkward or awful topic, there was a long silence in which we both just laid there, tanning in the sun. Well, I wasn’t sure if ponies tanned.

After what must’ve been hours, I felt a little on the hot side. “Hmm… wanna go to the lakeside?” I asked. Lassie was the first to answer.

“Oh yeah,” she replied, hopping up and wagging her tail, then barking several times. Twilight awoke from her nap. I guess she had been dozing without me knowing. With a stretch and a yawn, she nodded.

“I could go to the lake and relax for a while, that would be kind of nice and refreshing actually,” she offered. I smiled and stood up, then went to fetch a few towels.

Twilight made her way downstairs while Lassie followed me. My faithful, and now speaking, canine companion panted excitedly. “Daww, who’s a good girl Lassie? You are, yeah, you are,” I said in a bubbly voice and she barked before talking back.

“You know… it’s cute and all, but it’s also kinda creepy when you talk to me like that,” Lassie informed me and I just rolled my eyes, then leaned down to kiss her forehead. She quickly jerked her head to the side and lathered my face with dog kisses.

I folded some towels over my shoulder and walked back outside, where Twilight was waiting. “Aren’t you going to bring some shorts or something? Pants aren’t exactly swimwear,” she suggested but I shrugged.

“I can swim in my pants. I've done it before,” I replied. She facehoofed with a bemused exhale. We walked out the front doors and to my truck. I opened the passenger door and tossed the towels in the back, then offered Lassie residence in the back seat.

“Hey! Why can’t I ride shotgun?” she asked and I rolled my eyes.

“Because Twilight’s bigger and… oh to hell with it, you can ride in the front too,” I stated, rolling the passenger seat back into place before flipping up the middle console box to reveal the sixth seat.

With a happy bark, Lassie jumped up and circled around the middle seat before sitting down on her flank. I offered Twilight my hand to help her get in, which she graciously took.

As she got in, her tail fluffed, its end slowly sliding up my chest, around my neck, and wisping itself under my chin, almost as if she was taunting me in a way. I shivered from the feel of it. As she sat down, I closed the door with a gentle slam, making sure it was all the way shut.

I paced around to the driver side and stepped in with ease. Shutting the door, I swiped the naughty key, getting a twin set of beeps as my response. “Oh… I know Cadence. You love it when I do that to you, don’t you?” I asked in a sly voice and began to grope at the steering wheel. “Do you like it when I do this?” I asked, slipping the key into the ignition.

I began caressing the steering column casing, but Twilight interrupted me. “What are you doing?” she asked and I stuttered on my words.

“I… well… I was just, uhm…” I trailed off and quickly started the truck. Rather than race to our destination, I drove at a rather relaxing pace.

Lassie started messing around in the truck, shifting and moving around. “I want the window seat!” Lassie chimed at Twilight like some kid riding on a school bus. Lassie squirmed overtop Twilight and pawed at the control panel on the passenger side.

Looking back to me, she began barking at me before sputtering out words. “Roll down the window, man! I wanna feel that breeze rushing through my fur!” she announced. I just rolled my eyes as I used the driver side master control panel to roll down her window.

She leaned most of her upper body out the window. “YEAH BUDDY! I’M LIVIN’ THE DREAM!” she yelled out at random ponies in the street. Ponies were astounded by the talking dog, some probably believing it to be some kind of prank.

We drove by Fluttershy and Lassie pointed out to her. “HEY FLUTTERS! I’M HIGH ON LIFE BABY! WOOOO!” she screamed and Fluttershy’s face went pale. I suppose she had never actually seen a dog talk.

Lassie started to hum a tune to herself as we puttered along. Eventually we exited Ponyville and drove through a dirt path that led through the middle of a valley. The sun shone through the trees, glimmering shadows spread out throughout the valley we drove through.

Twilight shuffled closer to me, resting her head against my shoulder. Flipping out my aviators, I slipped them over my eyes. Cadence chugged a low rumble as we drove through the shady valley.

Shadows passed over my face as we drove along. Twilight closed her eyes as she rested against me. Lassie just sat with her face out the window, humming her tune. The passing air caught the flaps of her mouth and slobber was sucked out as she sat with a wide grin, lips flapping in the wind.

We eventually exited the valley and neared the lake. I pulled up and parked Cadence under the shadow of a tree. I opened my door but Lassie simply squirmed out the open window and landed with a ‘thump!’

It was a little bit of a jump from the window to the ground. I simply rolled my eyes in a bemused way while I shook my head. Lassie began racing around the waterfront, which in some spots had beach sand.

I helped Twilight out from Cadence and shut the door behind us. As we neared the beach, I kicked off my boots and took off all my clothes but my boxers, tossing everything onto my boots. Lassie rushed past us, zoomed up a rock formation near the water, and didn’t stop.

Her body flew into the air and she smiled wide, one of her teeth gleaming in the sun. Gliding through the air, her front legs extended as if she were actually flying and she let out a cheer, "I'm fly-". She landed in the water with a small splash and quickly surfaced, her hair draping over her eyes.

I snickered and Lassie laughed loud enough that we could hear. She began paddling around, somehow able to see through her wet fur that draped over her face. I approached the water with my mother and paced by the water.

“Hey Lassie, what’s the water like?” I asked.

“Come in and see,” she teased. I had a feeling that was either to conceal the fact it was cold or… she was just teasing me. I took a step into the water. It was on the warm side.

Twilight followed and we entered the lake. Lassie swam over and began humming the ‘Jaws’ tune. I chuckled just as she ducked under then leapt out of the water, yelling out the climatic tune of the theme, splashing against me and trying to tackle me.

She stood up to all fours, the waterline just at her belly as she leaned against my legs. I leaned forwards a bit so I could pat her side while she panted happily. After another few moments, Lassie trotted back up onto the beach sand and flopped down, resting her head between her paws and yawning exhaustively.

I walked out a bit further into the water, relieved by the peace of mind it brought. The warm water along with the tropical temperature and overall calmness brought about tranquility in the atmosphere.

Twilight managed to walk on her hindlegs through the water and to my side. “It’s wonderful,” she spoke softly and I nodded. The sun was starting to lower in the distant horizon, and its glimmering reflection added a truly beautiful look to the lake.

“Yeah, it really is something,” I replied. She slowly walked around and in front of me.

“Can you hold me? It’s sort of hard to stay standing on my hindlegs like this,” she asked. I did as requested and took her into a gentle hold. My hands held her around the front of her stomach, my hands resting where her bellybutton would be if she was a human. She slowly placed her hooves over my hands and sighed contently.

The lake’s waves gently brushed up against us as we stood there, swaying back and forth in each other’s embrace. The moment seemed to last forever and, truthfully, I didn’t want it to end. A flock of birds flew overhead and Lassie called out.

“Hey guys, look out! They might shit on you,” she called out, ruining the moment. I couldn’t help but laugh though, and Twilight looked up to see the flock flying high above us. “Hey, come on back here, you’re missing the best part,” Lassie called out.

We looked back to her, both wondering what she was referring to. A devious smile came across my face as I pulled Twilight up and out of the water, cradling her in my arms as I quickly rushed us back to shore. She let out a thrilled giggle as we splashed through the water foolishly.

Twilight giggled in my arms as the water splashed around us. As we reached the shoreline, I looked to Lassie. “What are we about to miss?” I asked, setting my mother down on all fours.

Lassie had pulled up two lawn chairs and a small table between them. She pointed to the distance. I turned, seeing nothing in particular. “What?” I asked, Twilight looking too.

“The sunset, yah goons,” Lassie quipped. At first I was a little bit less than thrilled about the thought of watching the sunset. I had done that before, and it wasn’t that great. But as Twilight sat down, she motioned for me to join her side.

As I sat down, Twilight offered me her hoof, which I took in a gentle hold, using my thumb to rub it lovingly. Lassie set up two wine glasses and poured us each a beverage. “I don’t drink,” I told her, but my canine simply rolled her eyes.

“I know. That’s why I brought soda. Besides, you’re the only one who can really drive that truck, and I don’t want you driving it intoxicated,” she said, speaking words of wisdom that I didn’t believe she had. For some reason I figured her to be a little more on the immature side.

I took my glass while Twilight levitated hers. Lassie sat beside me, mouth open in a smile as she panted gently, tongue hanging out. The sun gleamed off the water, its orange-ish haze a testament to the sheer beauty of this afternoon.

Twilight, Lassie and I sat watching the sun set, and unlike the sunset I had watched when I was younger, this one was more fulfilling. The peaceful setting, the beautiful orange haze, and spending time with my loving family… it doesn’t get much better than that.

Over an hour passed as we just sat there in silence, watching the sun set over the horizon. As the last glimpse of the sun set, it left a lingering red atmosphere. The clouds themselves reflected the lighting, adding an almost spooky look to the world.

“Well,” I said with a groan, standing up and stretching my legs. Though most of my body was dry from sitting out so long, the bottom side of my boxers were still soaked. “I think that was a day well spent,” I said, folding up my chair.

“Indeed,” Twilight added in, standing and folding her chair as well. I slipped on my clothes and groaned quietly as I felt the wetness from my boxers dampen my pants. Lassie was about to say something, then squealed in delight.

“OH MY GODDESS! I almost forgot!” she yipped and I raised an eyebrow.

“Almost forgot what?” I asked curiously.

"I wanted to go see it yesterday, but you were working. Can we please go see it tonight?! It looks like such a good movie! Pretty please? Pretty please with a cherry on top?" my canine friend asked, forgetting to tell me what the movie was.

“What movie?” I inquired.

“The Brains!” Lassie said excitedly, but Twilight just groaned. I looked over to her; she didn’t seem thrilled by the idea.

“What’s wrong?” I asked my mother.

“It’s the highly anticipated movie that just came out yesterday. Apparently it’s some sort of horror movie about alien bra-“ Twilight began but was cut short but Lassie.

“SSSH! Don’t tell him. Please, can we pretty please go see it?! Super pretty please cherry with whipped cream on top please?!” Lassie pleaded ecstatically. I guess she really wanted to go see that movie.

“Well… I guess we could,” I offered. Lassie let out a cheer, but Twilight just sighed. “Something wrong?” I asked the latter and she just shook her head.

“No, not really. I’m just not good with horror movies at this time of the day. They usually leave me plagued with nightmares,” she responded and I just shrugged.

“Oh come on. It could be fun,” I offered and she just rolled her eyes.

“Okay, maybe just this once.” She didn’t sound thrilled about it, but like I said, it could be fun. I set the table and chairs in the back of Cadence’s box and laid towels on the seats so we wouldn’t soak the cushion furnishing inside the truck.

The whole ride back to Ponyville, Lassie couldn’t stop squirming in excitement, going on and on about how great this movie was supposed to be. Twilight, on the other hand, didn’t seem overly happy about it. I kinda felt bad, dragging her along but family time is priceless.

I parked the truck around back of the movie theater, which was a little small and probably only housed two or three movies at a time. The moment we entered the building, the smell of buttery popcorn aroused my senses and my stomach rumbled.

“Ohh… I’m hungry,” I muttered as we approached the ticket booth. Lassie’s tail was wagging like a helicopter rotor, any faster and she could probably send herself airborne. Lassie hopped up, placing her front two paws against the ticket booth counter.

“Three tickets to ‘The Brains’!... please,” Lassie added in the last part in a polite manner, but the ticket master gulped.

“Gah! That dog can talk!” he gasped and Lassie rolled her eyes.

“Hey man, are you gonna give us those tickets or what?! The movie’s about to start!” she said in a rushed voice. I looked to the sign that displayed the movie times, then to my watch and realized she was right. Our movie started in three minutes.

The ticket master nodded and quickly typed it up. “That’ll be twenty bits,” he informed her. Lassie looked to me.

“You pay him. I got no pockets for money,” she said, tail still wagging. I pulled out twenty bits and handed them over. He replaced my bits with three movie tickets.

“Theatre number one,” the stallion informed us, but instead I moved towards the snacks counter where a stallion and a young mare tended to the needs of ponies.

There was a large menu displayed, showing the prices of everything they had. “Nachos… we need to get some nachos,” I muttered to myself.

“And some extra buttered popcorn… with a large soda,” Lassie chimed in, licking her lips in anticipation. Twilight smiled from our silliness.

“What do you want?” I asked my mother as we all stepped up to the counter. Twilight thought to herself as she glanced across the menu board.

“I think I’d like…” She trailed off with a ‘hmm’. “I’d like a small popcorn, no butter, and a bottle of water, please,” she ordered.

I ordered next. “Can I have some nachos, a large pop, and a large popcorn with butter please,” I ordered. The stallion wrote it down and went to check it in but Lassie piped up.

“And I’d like an extra-large popcorn that's lathered with lots and lots of butter. And I mean lathered like..." Lassie began making erratic movements as she motioned like she was pouring ludicrous amounts of butter on her popcorn. "I’d also like a large soda please,” she ordered and the stallion blinked then checked it through. I paid the bill and we waited a few moments for them to fetch our order.

The stallion leaned towards the young mare. “That dog can talk,” he whispered and she nodded in reply.

“I know. And look, that’s the hairless monkey that’s Princess Sparkle’s faithful student.” They continued to gossip, mostly about how a princess was in their theater. After another minute or so, they returned with our stuff.

Twilight looked to Lassie, who somehow held her soda in one paw while holding her bag of popcorn, overflowing with butter, in her teeth. “You know Lassie, sugar is bad for a dog.” Twilight informed her. Lassie muttered back, the popcorn bag muffling her voice.

“Yeah? Well yer fat,” Lassie quipped and Twilight gasped.

“I am not!” she exclaimed as we entered the theater doors, Lassie only snickering. The place was just starting to dim down as we ascended to the top row of seats. Surprisingly, there were only a few ponies in the theater.

We took our seats, setting our drinks in the little cup holders that were integrated into the foreleg rests. Only Lassie couldn’t fit her overly sized drink into the cup holder due to its bulky size. She set it between her hindpaws on the ground and began munching on the soggy popcorn.

The movie screen… actually it was one of those projection screens with the projector behind everypony, played commercial after commercial. Lassie leaned over to me. “Don’t you hate it when there’s like… ten minutes of commercials before the movie?” she asked and I nodded.

“I know what you’re talking about,” I replied with a quiet laugh. Finally, the commercials came to a close and the movie began, first crediting all the production companies associated with the movie itself.

As the movie began, there was an ominous tune that played in the background as the camera panned around a view of the stars. One of the stars glimmered and finally came shooting at the camera but missed. The view swiveled in place and followed the path of the asteroid as it shot towards the planet.

The setting suddenly changed to black and white, overlooking a city from the view of a forested cliff. A convertible motorized carriage sat near the overlook, with two ponies inside the vehicle.

“I don’t know Maple… maybe we shouldn’t,” said a very feminine voice as the camera moved in on the vehicle. Everything was still black and white.

“Oh come on baby, it’ll be fun. I promise,” pleaded a teenage male voice. The camera switched to a dashboard view of the vehicle, showing a young stallion in a football, or I guess in Equestria it would be hoofball, jacket as he leaned towards a mare wearing an old-school looking skirt.

“It’s just that… well… I’ve never done something like this before,” she said timidly and the stallion rested his hoof beneath her chin, lifting it so they were face to face.

“It’s okay sweetie. I’ll show you how,” he replied and they leaned in for a kiss and began making out. Lassie leaned over to me again.

“What a way to start a movie huh?” she asked and I nodded with a short, stifled laugh that left through my nostrils. Twilight sat quietly, already enticed by the movie. Suddenly, a meteor slammed into the ground a few yards away from them.

Despite being rather large, the meteor gave no shockwave from impact, simply making a crater. “What was that?” the mare gasped and the stallion just looked back.

“Just a meteor babe. Don’t worry about it,” he told her then tried to resume making out, but she wouldn’t go for it. I thought to myself, ‘Yeah, just a meteor that mystically struck the ground a few yards away from us… nothing to worry about.’

“I don’t know… maybe we should investigate,” she suggested, but the stallion merely groaned.

“It’s nothing, trust me,” the stallion told her. She was hesitant at first, but the stallion quickly made his move on her. They began kissing again and he started pulling up on the end of her skirt, showing views of her bare hindlegs as he pulled the skirt up and began aligning himself to nail her.

The view cut away from the car at the moment just before it would’ve shown explicit footage, and cut to a view behind the car. Amplified sounds of their kissing and moaning echoed from the carriage as it started to tilt every so often.

Suddenly there was a squelching sound and the camera started to move forwards almost as if we were watching from the view of some creature. Gross looking tentacle legs flopped around in front of the screen… I suppose that was supposed to be this creature’s legs.

Lassie was digging into her popcorn, the slimy butter from her treat greasing the fur around her mouth. Twilight watched the movie with her fullest of attention, biting her lip.

The camera point of view climbed the back of the car just before the view switched to that of the dashboard. The two ponies were entwined together and completely nude, but the camera used a catchy angle so that nothing was exposed as they got it on in the carriage.

Suddenly a shadow of a creature with demon red eyes came into view. The stallion turned with a scream as the camera jumped to the creature. The creature leapt at the screen with a frightening screech. The screen went black.

Twilight jerked in fright and cuddled into me fearfully. I’ll admit, I jumped a little too. That thing looked kinda freaky, plus you didn’t even really get to see the whole thing, just its shadow. On top of that, the screech it made was darkly unique.

As the screen faded back into lighting, it started to play a theme tune while it showed swirls of scientific stuff as the camera view sped along: test vials, needles, all those sorts of things. I listened to the intro. 'I know I've heard that somewhere before...' As the intro panned along, I realized it was traveling along what I believed to be an interpretation of a brain neural network… I think.

Finally, the brain network path came to an end and two big words slammed into view in dark gooey pink letters; ‘The Brains’, and little squiggles of what looked like brain tentacles squirmed off the ends of each letter. This was going to be a goofy horror movie, I could already tell…

* * *

Hours later…

We arrived back home and I opened the door to the dark library, leaving the lights off. While admitting the movie was good, Twilight wasn’t much of a horror movie pony and showed it true during most parts of the movie when she’d let out a yelp of fear and bury her face into me.

Contrary to my first belief, the movie wasn’t as goofy as I first thought it would be. Sure, the voice actors were really bland and had nearly no physical or verbal emotion whatsoever, but that just added to the greatness of the movie. It felt really 50s esque. And the story line was rather well thought out along with the jumper scenes, which really got me at times. I mean, when somepony goes to enter a closet, you'd figure the thing to be in the closet. But when there's nothing in the closet and they turn around to see a pony screech at the screen with a creepy alien brain suckling on his head... it's kinda freaky.

Lassie absolutely loved the movie, but now she was slugging it since she had indulged in so much popcorn and soda. “Ugh… I have a belly ache,” Lassie groaned as she slowly crawled up onto a living room chair.

My mind could barely operate properly, and my vision was foggy from the exhaustion I was going through. Twilight was already resting up against me, just barely conscious. I flopped down on the couch and she followed, landing on top of me.

Her body rested on top of mine, now fully passed out. I kicked off my boots and wiggled off my socks as my vision started to sway from side to side. My left arm reached up and around my mother’s back while my right arm dangled off the edge of the couch. My left leg hung over the edge of the couch, my body being to long, while my right leg hung off the couch my like my arm.

“What a day,” I mumbled, and the last thing I remembered was wishing that the couch was a pullout bed.

Author's Note

And once again *Sighs* it takes a month for a chapter to be released because... well, shit happens I guess. Anyway, here's a piece from the next chapter.

I felt like I was tongue tied. "M-m-mom... I-I-I-" She cut me off by connecting our lips again, this time for longer. As she pulled away, a strand of saliva connected our mouths.
"It's okay," she whispered into my ear, licking at my neck. My back arched as I gasped from the sensual act.
"Ah-h... but isn't this a...ah... a little... t-t-taboo?" I stammered nervously.
"We won't tell anypony," she offered, licking up my cheek and nibbling gently on my earlobe.//

Yeah, the next chapter is the one where they finally get it on.

Chapter 29

‘I-Isn’t this ah-a little… uh, you know? T-ta-taboo?...’

Burdy’s perspective…

I awoke peacefully, the feel of a warm presence atop of me putting my mind at ease. My nostrils caught whiff of a strange fragrance that filled the air. One that I couldn’t put my finger on. The smell however, made my insides feel all tingly.

As I lay on the couch with my mother on top of me, I let out a relieved sigh. Everything seemed to just… it just seemed perfect right now. The morning sun casting down a warm sensation to my skin, laying here with my loving mother.

A snore from Lassie whom lay napping on the cushion chair added another thing to the list. My faithful canine… whom could now talk… which was kind of strange but just another thing I’d have to get used to. As much as I don't want to admit it... I kinda liked it here, in Equestria. It took a little getting used to but...

As my mind fluttered with wonderful things, a certain thought came to mind that made me realize something was indeed wrong. “Oh crap… I forgot!” I whispered silently as I gently slid out from underneath Twilight’s body.

Today was Mother’s Day, and I hadn’t gotten her anything. I quickly slipped on my socks and boots while making for the door. Lassie’s voice chimed from across the room. “Where yah goin?” She asked.

I turned around and brought a finger to my lips, urging her to be quiet. “Sssh!” I ordered quietly, then pointed to Twilight. “I haven’t gotten her anything for Mother’s Day… I kinda forgot,” I admitted and Lassie rolled her eyes.

“So? Just make her breakfast. I’m sure she won’t mind,” she replied casually.

I scoffed at her idea. “I can’t do that. I need to get her something special,” I told her and she gave me a bemused look.

“You could just do something special for her… or to her,” she said in a strange voice of which the origin to her tone I wasn’t sure.

“Well… what do you think she’d like to do?” I asked in a curious tone. Lassie let out a disgruntled sigh.

“Never mind! Let’s just… go get her a present,” she muttered with a deep and flustered exhale. She muttered something under her breath that sounded like she said dumbass.

“What was that?” I asked and she shook her head.

“Nothing, I was saying ‘Run fast’ because she’ll probably be waking up soon,” Lassie told me.

“Good point, let’s hurry,” I added and with that rushed out the door. Lassie quipped something that sounded like she said ‘Useless twit’ but I didn’t bother asking what she said.

As we rushed out, I opted not to take Cadence. Starting her up might wake Twilight. Lassie and I rushed through the streets as I thought of suitable gifts. As I rushed along, I passed by Sugarcube Corner.

The aroma of freshly baked goods made my stomach rumble. Lassie tugged at my pant leg. “Maybe we could get her like… a treat basket or something?” she opted.

“Her… or you?” I asked laughingly and Lassie smirked.

“Both,” she replied. It wouldn’t be a bad idea… though I was looking for something more her style… but I suppose her style was books… and she was a librarian so she already had lots of books. I bit my lip. I was kinda hungry and could go for something sweet to eat.

Walking into the bakery shop, the two of us were greeted by the ever hyperactive Pinkie Pie. “Hiyah Evan! How’s it going?” She asked.

“Pretty good, yourself?” I replied casually.

“Oh I’m doing fine,” she replied then looked to Lassie. “And how are you doing Lassie?” she asked, not really expecting an answer like the one she got.

“I’m good. Hey, something smells really good. Can I have some?” she asked and Pinkie took a deep inhale and held it.

“OHMYGOSHTHATDOGCANTALK!” Pinkie blurted out and I groaned. I had a feeling that this wasn’t going to end well. Pinkie suddenly bent at her knees to lower herself so she could be at eye level with my dog. “Wow! That’s sooo cool! How do you do that?!” Pinkie asked excitedly.

Lassie clucked her tongue. “Well… you see… it’s a complex thing. Basically I have to move my jaw and tongue in a precise action while trying to pronounce the words I want through my throat.” Pinkie blinked.

“WOOOOWWWWW! I never knew it was that difficult for a dog to talk. I’m so glad it’s not that hard for ponies to talk,” Pinkie said with a bright smile as she stood up and began bouncing around. “So, whatta yah want to eat?” Our Pink, probably over-caffeinated friend asked.

“The thing that smells good,” Lassie stated then eyed the counter which had a variety of baked goods waiting.

“Well, the smell that’s in the air is actually muffins, but those cinnamon rolls are good too!” Pinkie stated then tossed one into the air, opened her mouth wide and sucking it down without even chewing it.

“Yep! Those!” Lassie stated. “Lots of them.” Pinkie nodded and tossed several into a bag along with some muffins.

I thought about Mother’s Day. “Hey Pinkie, got anything for Mother’s Day?” I asked wonderingly. She nodded in a blur of motion.

“Yep, sure do!” She said happily and reached over to my face. I went to lean back but she grabbed behind my ear. As she took her hoof away, she revealed a small cake with icing that read in purple lettering ‘Happy Mother’s Day, Twilight’.

“Wai… how…” I trailed off, baffled by how she did that. I scratched behind my ear, and didn’t even feel any frosting on my hair. How she accomplished these things would always be beyond me.

“That’ll be thirty bits, unless you want something else?” She asked and I looked to Lassie who was already indulging herself in treats.

“That’ll be all,” I responded, handing over the required bits. With a nod I started my departure. “You have a good one, eh.” I gave Pinkie a wave which she hastily returned.

As we started back to the library, a thought came up. Derpy had once mentioned a long time ago that she liked muffins. “Hey Lassie, save some muffins would yah?” I asked and Lassie looked to me, cinnamon sauce from one of the rolls drooling out the side of her mouth.

She looked to me. “Well of course, duh. We need to keep some for breakfast,” she said but I swayed my head from side to side.

“That wasn’t exactly what I meant,” I told her. She stopped.

“Well what did you mean? You’re not saying I’m gonna get fat, are you?” She asked and I merely chuckled as I shook my head.

“No, I don’t think you’ll get fat. But what I meant was, I have a friend in the hospital that kinda likes muffins… and I was thinking that maybe she’d some of them,” I suggested.

She pondered the suggestion. “It’s kinda out of our way… by a long shot, and Twilight might wake up by then,” she stated. I nodded.

“Yeah… I know, but still. I think she’d enjoy it,” I offered. She nodded and we made haste, rushing towards Ponyville Hospital on the outskirts of town.

Just before we entered, I stopped. “What?” Lassie asked in slight irritation. I slid up against a wall and peeked in through the window, peering into the receptionist area.

“I’m overdue for a tetanus after… well, the barn fire. I think Redheart might try to get me if she sees me.” I peeked around but couldn’t spot her. “Do you see her?” I asked and Lassie poked her head through the doors.

“I dunno. What’s she look like?” She asked.

“Red mane and tail. White fur,” I stated and Lassie chuckled.

“Oh man… she’s a hotty! Ohhhh…” Lassie shuddered with a sly smile. “If I were you… I’d let her nurse me all day, hubba hubba,” Lassie said in an exasperated tone with a wink and I rolled my eyes with a toss of my head.

“Lassie… that’s just wrong,” I muttered then peeked back through the window. “Where is she?” I asked and Lassie hopped up beside me.

“Give me a boost and I’ll show yah,” she said. I lifted her up so she could point her out. Clear as day, there she was. Behind the receptionist desk.

I set Lassie down on all fours. “This could be tricky,” I muttered as I thought to myself. My eyes caught sight of a cardboard box…

* * *

Third person…

The door opened and a shadowy figure walked in, her face concealed by a cowboy hat and body nearly completely covered by a western duster coat. She trotted along and up to the front desk.

In a muffled voice she spoke out here needs. “I’m here to see a friend. Ms. Derpy Hooves,” said the shadowed figure. The receptionist looked over the counter to notice who she believed to be a pony, was shorter than everypony else.

Unbeknownst to everypony in the room, a cardboard box shimmied its way across the room. With nopony taking notice, the box slipped up the nearby stairwell undetected.

“Second floor, fifth room,” the receptionist informed the duster clad figure. With a nod, the figure began walking towards the stairs. With a quick glance, the receptionist gave a shocked look as she swore she saw a furry dog tail wagging to and fro, added with dog paws.

“Huh?” she muttered to no pony in particular before shaking her head frantically. As she looked back, the figure was gone, having quickly ascended the stairs. “My mind must be playing tricks on me,” the nurse muttered to herself.

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…

I discarded the cardboard box and set it aside in the corner of the hallway. “Okay, so where is she?” I asked as Lassie handed me back my clothing.

“Over here,” she replied and led me over to a recovery room. I cautiously entered, being weary of that grey doctor whom I didn’t quite see eye to eye with. With a peek inside, I saw that it was just Derpy, all by her lonesome.

I quickly stepped in, Lassie sneaking in as well, before I quietly shut the door behind me. Derpy looked over, probably expecting a doctor or nurse. As she saw me, her face went bright with a wide smile.

“Evan!” She said aloud in a cheerful way. I brought my finger to my lips, ushering her to be a bit quieter.

“Sssh, not so loud. I can’t let the docs know I’m here,” I informed her as I walked over to her bedside. “They wanna stick me with a needle, yah know.” I made the motion like I was giving myself a needle then gave a phobic shiver.

I pulled up a seat and grabbed the bag of treats from Sugarcube. “Here, I brought you something. Might taste better than the hospital food they’ve been giving you,” I offered. Derpy opened the bag and gasped excitedly.

“OH MY GOSH! THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU! I love it!” she announced as she tugged me into a hug and gave me a kiss to the cheek.

“Glad you do. I remembered you once saying you liked muffins so… well, yeah.” I scratched the back of my head timidly with a chuckle. Derpy pried open the brown paper bag and sucked back a muffin, the crumbs littering her medical sheets.

“MMM! These are really good,” she said through a mouthful, crumbs falling from her mouth and further littering the place. “You want one?” She asked, offering me one.

Lassie spoke up. “Absolutely,” she replied, mounting her forelegs onto the side of the bed and snatching up a muffin from the bag. As she gobbled it down, Derpy looked to Lassie with a stunned expression which, with her crossed eyes, looked cute and adorable.

“Did she just… talk?” Derpy asked and I waved casually.

“Don’t get her started… yeah, Lassie talks,” I informed my pegasus friend. Derpy looked again to my talking companion then back to me and offered me a muffin.

“Thank you, but no thank you. I haven’t had breakfast yet,” I gave my sincere thoughts. Derpy sat and munched on her muffins while from time to time sharing one with Lassie. A rather short time passed before Derpy quickly cleaned off the nightstand and placed a black and white checkered game board on the table.

“Wanna play chess?” she asked. Again, despite having played chess with her before, I was surprised by the fact she wanted to play a complex strategy board game.

“Alright, we could play,” I said and Lassie tapped my leg with a ‘Ahem’.

I looked to her and she tapped her watch. “Mommy might be waking up soon,” she stated but I merely shrugged.

“Don’t worry Lassie. We’ll make it back in time for me to make Mother’s Day breakfast. Besides… these times are precious, and we have to enjoy them whenever we have the chance.” Lassie just shrugged then dug into anther cinnamon roll.

Again Derpy was the white pieces, her king being Princess Celestia while I played as black, my king piece resembling Nightmare Moon. I took a brief look at her. She had this look to her that made my conscious pipe up. ‘I wonder what she was like?’ My conscious asked and I shrugged.

“We’ll never know,” I replied and Derpy looked to me.

“We’ll never know what?” She asked and I shook my head.

“Don’t worry, it’s nothing,” I assured her. Taking first move, Derpy immediately moved her knight past her front line of pawns, making me contemplate whether I should do the same.

With a scratch of my chin, I decided to make a move with a pawn, taking it’s allowed two space first movement. Derpy began to play with an almost aggressive competition-like gameplay, watching my every move with hawk-like attention.

In a matter of a few plays, she started taking out all my pieces. “Oh jeeze, I’m getting smoked,” I muttered and Lassie just snickered at me. “Hush you,” I said jokingly as Derpy continued to dominate me.

As the game started to near it’s end, I only managed to take out a bishop, and her two knights, along with two pawns while she had eradicated all but my king, two pawns and a rook and a bishop.

I made a decisive move by pinning her king into a check, forcing her to move her queen in front. I took her queen with pride, finally accomplishing something in the game. After my move however, she quickly erased all my remaining players, one move at a time, except my king. With no other players left, she had effectively won.

I went to topple the king piece but stopped as I rested my finger on her head. Something down deep wouldn’t let me topple my last piece. Something told me to leave it standing.

I took my hand away. “You win,” I appraised Derpy, who clapped her hooves together in excitement.

She leaned over and gave me a hug. “Thanks for visiting and bringing me the muffins. It means a lot,” she thanked me and I merely returned her hug, stroking my hand through her wonderful mane.

She was a nice mare, and had genuinely pure intentions, even if they went astray by accident. The door to the room opened and I turned immediately. Nurse Redheart dropped the food tray. “EVAN!” She gasped.

Lassie rushed forwards and between Redheart’s legs, toppling her balance. “SCATTER!” Lassie yelled out in a frantic yet joyful tone.

As Redheart was trying to regain her posture, I turned to Derpy. “I’ll see you soon,” I told her as I broke from the hug and dashed for the window.

“EVAN WAIT!” Redheart ordered. I didn’t want to risk it. Leaping for freedom, the glass shattered as I jumped through the window. Glass shards surrounded my body as I ejected myself from the room via the improvised exit.

My duster coat flaps fluttered about as I fell towards the ground. I crashed into a trash dumpster full of garbage and groaned as my body was gracefully and, for the most part, painlessly caught by filled garbage bags. Most was disposed food that squished beneath me and made me feel disgusting.

I groaned as I flopped out of the dumpster and retrieved my hat that had fallen from my head when I jumped. Lassie and I quickly regrouped and darted back towards Ponyville. Redheart looked out the window and yelled for me to stop, but there was no way in Equestria I was going back to get needled.

* * *

Twilight’s perspective…

I rushed through the empty streets in a panic. Creepy squid... brain things chased after me, hovering a few inches from the ground. I bit my lower lip in fear as I attempted to cast a teleportation spell.

With a flash I found myself in the laundromat. I let out a sigh but an awful telepathic voice entered my mind. “Brains… Brains!... BRAINS!” I screamed as a brain with two reddish eyes floated towards me.

Suddenly the brain burst apart as a thunderous echo boomed in the laundromat. I was deafened at first, but my hearing quickly returned with just a small ringing in the back of my hearing.

I blinked in disbelief as I stood in a daze. Time seemed to slow as I turned for the door. A radiance of light surrounded a bipedal figure, with a western coat that draped at his sides and fluttered in the seemingly non-existent wind.

He brought a large shiny piece of metal in front of his face and blew away the smoke before spinning the chunk of steel and holstering it into a belt of some sort. I still felt dazed yet I couldn’t understand why as I mindlessly trotted towards him.

As I neared, the seemingly holy aura around him simply vanished and his true form was revealed. “Evan?!” I gasped, but as I quickly thought back to what had just happened, he was truly the only one who fit the role: bipedal, large and he had that thing he called ‘Belladonna’.

“The one and only,” he quipped.

I let out a fluttered sigh, my estrus taking over slightly. “You saved my life. How could I ever repay you?” I asked in an exasperated tone. He opened his mouth to say something but bit his lip. “What?” I asked, waiting for him to respond.

“Mom… this may seem weird but…” he trailed off as he scooped me up to my hind legs, his arms immediately moving to my hips. I gasped in shock, his sudden movements taking me by complete and utter surprise.

His lips pressed against mine to silence my shocked gasp. His eyes closed as did mine and we shared a relatively passionate moment for a brief second. As the moment came to a close, he pulled his lips away. “I know I shouldn’t… but I want you… I want to take you mother, and make you mine,” he said in a lust filled voice.

I felt as if something had crawled into my throat. ‘Did he really just say that?’ I asked myself. “Wha…” I trailed off. He took his arms away from my sides and let me drop to all fours as he turned in self-disgust.

“I know it’s wrong. It’s disgraceful for me to think about you in such a way… I should’ve known you wouldn’t think the same way,” he replied in a saddened tone. He went to leave but I grabbed the shoulder of his coat and spun him around, immediately leaping to my hindlegs and latching my lips to his.

After the sudden expression of my feelings, I tilted my head back, parting our lips for the moment. “I want you too,” I said in a hushed voice. His arms wrapped around my lower back as he began planting lustful kisses down my neck.

The sudden show of affection made my whole body tense. He took advantage of this, spinning my body around and laying me flat on a laundry table. It was a little awkward, to think that we were going to have sexual intercourse in a laundromat.

His hands ran up and down my sides, stopping momentarily at my flanks to get a good feel of them every time he passed them. I moaned as his kisses traveled further down to my shoulders. “Oh Evan… you don’t know how long I’ve wanted this,” I whined.

“I’m sorry… I had no idea until just recently,” he replied. I wanted to facehoof.

“How did you not know?” I asked, somewhat awestruck by how severely dense he was. Seriously, they could probably name a mental condition after it or something. Like 'The Pinkie Sense' except they’d call it… 'Burdy’s Density'…

“Put a cherry on top,” he said and my face nearly twisted in confusion.

“What?!” I asked in a dumbfounded voice.

“What?” He asked in an equally dumbfounded voice. I decided to disregard his out of place comment and began kissing him again. He dropped his duster coat off and set aside his cowpony hat. Tugging at the bottom of his shirt with my hooves, he quickly understood what I wanted and helped in the removal of his shirt.

His body frame was always something of my own particular interest. It was so different from a pony’s, and so intriguing. Unlike most bodybuilders, he didn’t have defined abdominal muscles, yet he had a physically fit and defined muscular posture that was truly something to behold.

My hooves ran along his body. Shivers went down my spine. ‘Sweet Celestia… it’s almost like his body was chiselled from stone,’ my conscious whispered.

“And shred some chocolate on it,” he laughed and again I was stunned by his rather odd statement.

“What?!” I asked, shocked and confused. His face went blank as a voice from beside me spoke up.

“Yeah, and put some more whip cream on it,” a feminine voice chimed. I turned to see Lassie standing there. What in Equestria was she doing here? I suddenly felt light headed and the world around me began to fade into a golden haze. The golden haze seemed to absorb everything into it as my mind drifted away…

* * *

I awoke on the couch in a bit of a slump. ‘Drat,’ I thought to myself. ‘It felt so real but… it was just a dream.’

I sighed in a depressed way. ‘Someday Twilight, someday,’ I assured myself. Shaking of the morning dreariness, I heard voices coming from the kitchen. “You think she’ll like this?” Asked a masculine voice. It was strange really. Lately Evan’s voice had become so… gentle and not so brash and heavy like when he had first arrived in Equestria… it was kind of cute really.

“Oh yeah. If there’s one thing an egghead like your mother will like, it’ll be a breakfast like this,” said an undeniable voice. Lassie was such a little… well, there wasn't really a single definable word for her other than, she was Lassie and there wasn’t anypony… anything, quite like her.

I stood up and stretched, my estrus still in full bloom and showing no signs of stopping, at least not until maybe tonight if I’m lucky, probably tomorrow morning. I slowly made my way into the kitchen, but as I did, Evan took me by complete surprise by grabbing me up and swinging me into the air in his arms.

“WHA!” I gasped in freight. He settled me down but only to my hindlegs as he buried a kiss into my cheek.

“Happy Mother’s Day,” he said happily, nestling his head into my neck. I shivered from the expression of affection. I just didn’t want it to end. Holding him tightly I closed my eyes and sighed contently.

Something smashed against the ground and my eyes shot open in fright. We both turned to Lassie whom was standing on her hindlegs, looking to the ground with her left paw holding some orange juice and the other paw empty. On the floor was a plate of eggs.

With her head tilted down, she blinked then looked up to us, then down to the mess on the floor and, finally, back to us. “It was an accident, I swear,” she apologized with little emotion in her voice. I went to levitate out a dust pan and broom but Evan set me back down.

“Nah, nah. It’s Mother’s Day. You don’t have to do anything,” he ordered me, setting me down on a chair and pulling it up to the table for me.

Grabbing a broom, and Lassie grabbing a dust pan, the duo quickly swept up the mess. Evan grabbed a plate of waffles in one hand and a plate of pancakes in the other, setting them both on the middle of the table.

Lassie set up fine dining glasses and a glass pitcher of orange juice. I went to fetch the pitcher to pour myself a glass but Lassie stopped me. “Ah-ah-ahh, what he said,” Lassie told me, then somehow managed to pour me a glass of orange juice. It was strange seeing a dog manage to hold things in its paws.

Evan returned with some toast and eggs, along with utensils. Lassie pulled up a chair beside me, and Evan across. Lassie was the first to speak. “It’s really too bad Spike isn’t here,” she commented. I went to pick up my fork but Lassie stopped me then looked to Evan.

“You’re a man of god right?” she asked and Evan raised an eyebrow.

“I have faith, though it’s sketchy... why?” Evan replied and Lassie smiled.

“Well, maybe you should say grace. Seeing as how we’re all here,” Lassie motioned and Evan nodded.

“That’s a good point,” he said then reached over and took Lassie’s paw in his left hand. Lassie placed her paw on my hoof and I looked over to see Evan’s hand extended for me to take.

I reached out and took his hand, though I wasn’t quite sure what I was supposed to do. I never really bothered myself with religion. Evan dipped his head down and Lassie whispered to me. “Lower your head and close your eyes,” she mentioned quietly and I quickly did as she asked.

Evan began a prayer to god, which I wasn’t sure what to think of. “Dear, Lord Jesus, please come and be our guest; and bless to us what you have bestowed. We thank you for bringing us together; my loving mother, my best friend Lassie, and even Spike who may not be here with us at the moment but is in spirit. I thank you for keeping us together even through the roughest of times, amen,” Evan said softly.

I wanted to ask why he thanked god for the food? The pegasus coordinated the weather, Celestia brought about the sun, earth ponies harvested the food and he cooked it? So why was he thanking his god for this? On top of that, why did he thank god for keeping us together? Wasn’t that something we did on our own? ‘Bah, I’ll never understand religion,’ I thought silently to myself.

To my stunned appeal, Lassie and Evan both ate with grace, unlike every single time they had before. Lassie sat upright and ate with utensils and Evan the same. I followed queue, though I used my magic to levitate my utensils.

I looked up to see Evan staring at me with dreamy eyes. He caught wind of my returning stare and quickly looked away bashfully. “Evan, is something wrong?” I asked and he shook his head with a blush.

“No, it’s nothing… I just… you have pretty eyes,” he said, almost embarrassed. I smiled. His kind words touched my heart as a gentle smile crept across my lips.

“Thank you,” I whispered back. For over an hour we just all sat and conversed, eating from time to time but for the most part spending quality… ‘family’ time, together. As the food slowly dwindled away, mostly into Lassie’s gullet, breakfast came to an end. Evan stood up and grabbed the dirty dishes while Lassie slurped up the extra food.

I went to stand up but Evan put a hand on my shoulder. “Hold on, I have something for you,” he announced then rushed off. I turned to see where he was going, but Lassie covered my eyes with her paws.

“HEY!” I gasped but Lassie whispered into my ear to shush. After a few seconds, I heard Evan return. Lassie removed her paws from my face and I blinked a few times before spotting a small cake in front of me, the words ‘Happy Mother’s Day, Twilight’ written in purple icing. My mouth went agape but as I went to speak, Evan laced a necklace around my neck.

I looked down to the necklace piece, to see a charm that was a single purple star, much like my cutie mark. “I-I-I…” I stammered, unable to piece together words about how I felt.

I heard Lassie snicker. “I told you she’d like the necklace.”

“Shush you,” Evan snipped back quietly. I felt Evan’s face brush up into my cheek as he gave me a wet kiss. I blinked, my mind completely blanked out. “Happy Mother’s Day,” he gave me a brief hug then paced away, leaving me alone with the cake and necklace.

The necklace itself had radiance to it, and reflected light in a seemingly purple aura. It was almost like my element crown except it was just a small silver chain that held it around my neck.

I turned to ask Evan if he wanted some of the cake, but noticed he had already left. I looked back to the cake. It was rather small and probably was meant for just a single pony. I sighed and decided to indulge myself just a little. I levitated over a knife and fork and cut out a sliver of the cake for myself. Taking a small nibble, I whispered to myself about how good it was. “Pinkie probably baked this,” I told myself. That mare really makes good food.

I finished the slice of cake rather quickly and stashed the rest in the fridge. I was already full and didn’t really need to eat that cake now. I stood up and looked around. It wasn’t quite noon yet but close enough. The thought of midday reminded me of Lassie’s ultimatum. I quietly gave a mild swear. There was no way I could make Evan naturally fall in love with me in a matter of half a day…

I began to lose hope. I bit my lip then straightened my posture. “Buck up Twilight. That’s not the attitude that takes his heart!” I told myself assumingly then quickly fell into a slump on the ground. “Oh who am I kidding? It’s useless. He wouldn’t love me anyway,” I moped depressingly. I gently flumped my head into the floor as I lay there in a heap. “Why does Lassie have to be so mean?” I whispered quietly.

As I lay there in silence, a gentle and relaxing tone entered my ears, perking my interest and almost making me fall asleep. I stood up and shook off my depressed thoughts as I followed the sounds upstairs.

As I followed the peaceful tunes that were probably coming from a radio, I heard soft giggling. Reaching the balcony door, I opened it to find Lassie and Evan… I had no idea what they were doing.

Evan was standing with his legs close together and his arms stretched out completely horizontal. Lassie was lying on her stomach, her hindlegs stretched out behind her and her front legs holding her up as she stretched out her back.

Evan extended his left leg directly outwards t his left and began to tilt his body to the right. Keeping his arms fully extended, he tried to manage his balance. Lassie snickered. “Don’t fall,” she teased. Evan wobbled as he stifled a laugh.

“Shut up,” he giggled.

“Don’t fall,” Lassie again teased, prompting him to fall.

“Shut up, you’re gonna jinx me,” Evan commented as he wobbled further, struggling to keep his balance as he continued to accomplish whatever it was he was trying to do.

“You’re gonna fall,” Lassie squeaked with delight, almost like an instigating foal. Evan’s right leg began to shake and as he tried to further arc his body, he lost balance and collapsed. “Told you so!” Lassie squealed in laughter and Evan just groaned.

“Well you jinxed me!” He scoffed then stood up. “Oh hey mom,” Evan said casually.

“What… are you doing?” I asked curiously. It looked like aerobics or something but I wanted to know for sure.

Lassie answered my question. “Yoga, it’s good for the body and soul… and stuff like that,” she informed me. I looked to Evan. I didn’t take him for the kind of pony… person, to do Yoga. I thought he liked weight training.

“You do Yoga?” I asked and Evan snickered as he again tried the pose from earlier.

“Yeah, just don’t… tell anypony. They’ll think… I’m weird, especially Rainbow Dash,” he muttered out as he struggled to again complete the pose. Lassie snickered.

“You are weird,” she blurted out and Evan lost his balance and collapsed again.

“Ugh… Lassie, that’s not fair. I didn’t distract you,” he commented and my mind visualized Lassie trying that pose.

“But you are weird,” Lassie stated as she sat on her haunches and sat in a meditating pose.

“I am not!” Evan exclaimed and Lassie just snickered.

“There’s a mare that loves you with all her heart and tries to express it to you… yet you’re too idiotic to see that,” she commented and Evan’s face twisted into a confused look.

“What? Really?” He asked and Lassie shook her head.

“It doesn’t matter, finish the pose,” Lassie ordered. Evan just sighed irritably.

“Only if you stop psyching me out of concentration,” Evan quipped then tried again.

As he was halfway through the pose, or at least I thought he was halfway, Lassie began to talk in an voice that sounded like she was a wise old stallion. “Distractions matter not. A master of magic… concentrates, even with disruptions, happening all around him,” she stated. Evan stifled a laugh.

“Stop,” Evan muttered.

“One with nature, you must become,” she stated and Evan collapsed on the ground, laughing his heart out. Lassie’s straight face broke into a smile as she stood up onto all fours, walked over and began licking Evan’s face.

“ACK! Okay Lassie, you win!” Evan laughed, scratching behind her ears with his fingers. With a deep exhale, Evan sat up and looked to me. “Was the cake any good?” he asked.

“How do you know I didn’t just save it for later?” I asked and he motioned as if he was cleaning something off his lips. I gulped sheepishly then licked my lips, the taste of the cake’s icing tempting my taste buds.

“Oops… ah-heh-heh, I must’ve missed that,” I giggled and he just nodded as he stood up.

“Yeah… Pinkie really is a good cook, eh?” he asked rhetorically. Everypony knew Pinkie was a good cook.

Speaking of the cake, a thought came to mind. “Oh, uhm… there’s still some of that cake left if you want to try some,” I offered but he merely waved his hand.

“Oh no, it’s okay. I got that for you,” he stated but I persisted.

“No really, I wouldn’t mind,” I said with a loving smile. He returned my smile and exhaled through his nose.

“Oh okay,” he said then opened the door. I went to follow him but Lassie hopped up to her hind paws and whispered into my ear.

“Be bluntly direct with him,” she told me. I felt my stomach drop. As if she was still going to enforce her ultimatum with me… maybe she was just acting like she would but wouldn’t actually.

I nodded and proceeded downstairs with Evan, and into the kitchen. With my magic, I popped open the fridge door. Evan noticed and took a look inside, quickly fishing out the cake. “You sure? I could always get another one,” he offered but I shook my head.

“No really. I love that you got me this, but I couldn’t eat it all by myself.” Evan shrugged casually as he set the cake down. Before he could protest, I grabbed the utensils with my magic. “It may be Mother’s Day, but I’m still aloud to do things,” I told him. He laughed quietly to himself as he brought out two small desert plates.

I took the knife in my magic aura and cut the cake into multiple slices. Using the knife like a pie server, and a fork to hold it in place, I placed two slices of cake on his plate and offered it to him. “Thanks,” he thanked me softly, taking his plate. I only took one piece, I would’ve taken another but I was already feeling a little on the stuffed side of things.

With an almost elegant grace, he used his fork to cut away small pieces of his cake slices, then scooped them up. He ate in such a manner one might mistake him for pish-posh royalty of Canterlot.

Though it was nice for him to eat with civilized manners, it was a little too out of character for him and I didn’t really want him acting like this just because it was Mother’s Day… actually, I wasn’t sure if I wanted him to act like this in general. There’s a fine line between being a gentlecolt and being… uptight, I suppose would be the word.

I took a piece of cake on my fork and flung it at him. The icing splattered across his cheek and took him by surprise. “UGH! Hey!” He gasped and I shrugged coyly like I had no idea what he was talking about.

“What?” I asked and he wiped away the icing. “That wasn’t me,” I stated playfully. He set his hands lower to the table and I didn’t even have time to flinch as he pulled back on the head of his fork then sling-shot a full piece of cake at me that ended up splattering against my forehead.

“Gotcha!” He announced his believed victory but two could play at this game. Before he could react, I flung my piece of cake at him, the icing smearing into his thick sideburns.

“Ahh… I can’t believe you just did that,” he said and I smirked.

“You did it too!” I laughed. As I said that, he tossed his last piece of cake at me, the cake flying low and smucking itself against my chest. Globs of icing dripped down along with chunks of cake.

“Looks like I win,” he announced joyfully with a smile.

“How do you figure?” I asked and he pointed to my plate.

“You’re out of munitions,” he commented and I secretly took hold of the cake with my magic.

“That’s what you think,” I teased just as I threw the entire cake into his face. It splattered magnificently against his face, spews of icing flying everywhere. "But I have access to the armory!" I announced victoriously. There was a pause as the cake slowly slid off his face. Very slowly, he rose his left hand and used his thumb and index finger to wipe away the icing from his eyelids.

He opened his eyes and looked to the cake. “That’s a little… extreme, don’t you think?” He asked in a somewhat unimpressed tone.

“Oh… sorry, I just-“ I went to apologize but in my absence of thought, he managed to sneak attack me, launching what was left of the splattered cake back at me. The cake erupted as it hit my face, poofing apart and smearing more icing into my fur. I blinked, completely unable to fathom that he just did that.

With a laugh, I realized he had been playing me into believing he was disappointed. “Oh… you little devil,” I laughed and quickly jumped across the table, playfully smearing cake into his face. With the extra weight, the chair leg snapped and he fell back, the chair splintering apart under our combined weight.

Evan kicked away the shards of woods and grabbed a fistful of cake then smear it into my mane. “ACK! Hey, that’ll take hours to get out!” I gasped and he snickered.

“Okay, Rarity,” he teased. I grabbed some icing with my magic and slushed it into his retro styled hair.

“UGH! Hey, I… oh… it-is-on!” He said and I laughed.

“Now who’s Rarity?” I laughed. As I said that, he flipped our bodies, rolling on top of me and smearing cake into my face. I grabbed a hoof full of whatever cake I could grab and smeared it into his face.

Within seconds, we had made a complete mess on the floor. Evan couldn’t stop snickering, and neither could I. With a hint of competiveness, I giggled. “You know… since it’s Mother’s Day, I don’t have to clean this,” I teased and his smile quickly faded into a face of sudden realization.

Another second passed and he put on a serious face, the look he always had before he muttered something in that quoting tone. “You win dis one,” he said.

‘Yep, sure enough,’ I thought to myself, his quip confirming my suspicion. Some kind of rock music began playing from the living room, singing about a best friend giving him the best advice.

Lassie’s voice squealed from the living room. “OH MY GODDESS! This guy’s great!” With that said, the music got louder. Evan looked over to the living room, standing up and walking into the living room where the music was coming from.

The music was kind of enchanting, now singing about if today was you’re last day. “Lassie, where’d you get that?” Evan asked his canine companion who simply shrugged innocently.

“It was in your truck. What’s a Nickelback?” she asked and Evan just laughed as he picked up a disc box. There was a cover photo of a human like Evan, except the man had a golden mane, err… hair.

“It was a rock… well, they played a variety of music, but they were a famous music band back on my world,” Evan told Lassie who hopped up onto him and began licking at his face.

“You taste good, here, let me lick your face,” Lassie laughed and Evan just snickered as Lassie cleaned off his face. Lassie looked to me and quickly rushed over to me, nearly tackling me over as she leapt onto me and began licking my face clean.

“ACK! Lassie, I know where that tongue’s been,” I protested but she didn’t stop, even licking the icing and cake out of my mane. Though she didn’t lick up everything, Evan and I were significantly cleaner.

“What did you guys do? Have a food fight…” Lassie trailed off as her nose wiggled and she followed her sense of smell into the kitchen. “AWW! COOL!” Lassie announced. Evan peaked into the kitchen and snickered.

“She says she likes the cake,” Evan told me. I smiled as I tried to hold back a giggle that ended up leaving through my nostrils. The music continued singing about the day being your last day and living each moment like your last.

It was catchy, I’d give it that. “Evan, what would you do?” I asked and Evan looked over to me with a raised brow.

“What would I do if what?” he asked.

“If today was your last day?” I replied with another question. He stopped and paused.

“I uhh… I dunno…” he trailed off, looking down to the floor. “It seems a little depressing to think about it, no?” he replied to my question with another question. “I’d just… I’d want to say goodbye to so many ponies, and… I…” he trailed off then after another pause, he laughed. “Good thing it isn’t my last day, huh?” he chuckled.

I hopped up to my hindlegs and held him in a loving embrace. “I’m happy it isn’t. I never want to lose you,” I whispered. His hands wrapped around my waist and we just stood there, swaying to and fro as the music played.

Song after song played but it didn’t matter, they just kind of tuned out as I stood there with him in a cherished embrace. With his left hand, he took hold of my right hoof, continuing to sway. His right hand snugged low around my waist.
He tilted his head lower and nestled his cheek into my face. “Thank you,” Evan whispered. I kept my eyes shut as I nestled my head under his chin, burying my face into his neck… he needed to shave soon.

“For what?” I asked. There was a long pause and I felt a tear droplet splash against my horn.

“For… you know. Being there for me. Sheltering me, loving me… for…” he trailed off as he got choked up.

“It’s what moms do, right?” I said, not wanting to try and explain again that I wasn’t his mother. He kept holding me tight. “I love you, and I’ll keep loving you until the end of days,” I whispered to him and he sucked up as he hiccupped a sob. I felt his heart flutter in his chest.

There was a moment’s pause and… I just went with it. Looking up to him, he leaned back and looked down to me. My body instinctively moved on its own and I leaned my face towards his, gently closing my eyes as I did. In moments, our lips connected and we stayed like that for several seconds before departing our kiss.

My estrus took over slightly and I kissed the side of his neck, making him shudder slightly. My right hindleg lifted up and hugged tightly across his back. My breathing became heavier as I planted another kiss on his neck, and I heard a heavy exhale leave his mouth as his hand around my waist gripped tighter.

He dropped my hoof and reached to my waist, my forehooves traveling around the back of his neck. He lifted me up and my free hindleg also wrapped around his waist. He exhaled deeply, almost as if he grunted. He nestled his head past my mane and kissed the side of my neck.

A gentle, sensual moan left my mouth. He pulled our bodies closer together and I embraced him with another kiss which he returned. Our kisses started to become longer. I opened my mouth slightly to allow him to tongue kiss with me. At first he paused but soon after I felt his tongue snake into my mouth. My own met his and they tangled together.

I felt him moan deeply, more like an animal than a human. My own moan travelled out my mouth and into his and I felt his body surge into me as his back arched. Suddenly he stopped with a gasp. His eyes widened with… fear, I think. He quickly set me down and stumbled back, away from me

“Ah… I-I-I… I should’ve… I guess I... could go a shower…” he stuttered nervously, misplacing his words, shivering as if he was suffering hypothermia, his entire body shaking uncontrollably.

He slowly paced away and I raised a hoof as if to stop him, my tongue getting caught up on what to say. I bit my lower lip, I had no idea how to approach him. The music stopped and I looked back to see Lassie setting a new CD in the radio. Within seconds, a soft music started to play that made me want to cry. It was so soft and gentle, yet so sad.

Lassie looked up to me, a tear in her eyes. “I’m sorry,” she apologized, but sorry for what I wasn’t yet sure.

“For what?” I asked and she sighed.

“I kinda rushed you into this whole mess and… I kinda feel like a bitch about it,” she admitted. Well that much I could agree on.

“You should feel ashamed. Even contemplating to take him away from me when you know I love him is just… low,” I told her but she snickered as she shook her head.

“I wasn’t actually serious,” she told me and I jerked my head back in surprise. She just rolled her eyes as she scoffed. “If I didn’t act serious, you wouldn’t have taken the threat seriously and wouldn’t have done anything. Sure other mares, some you know, get moist just from the thought of him, but I don’t. Yeah he’s a great guy and all but I don’t see him like that. Hell, he’s not even the same species, that’d be just weird,” she told me then looked up to me and stifled a laugh. “I seriously don’t know what you see in that guy. He’s dumb as a brick, and dense like one too. He’s not even the same species and he considers you his mother…” she trailed off and sighed, standing to her hindlegs.

She placed one of her front paws on my shoulder and looked me dead in the eyes with the most sincere look she had ever given me. “Now… go get your man,” she told me with a wink.

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…
My heart was racing, hands shaking, sweat beading down my face, body twitching uncontrollably. Shivers went down my back as I stood near the mirror. ‘What’s happening?’ I asked myself, unable to compute this feeling. It was that smell…I knew it was.

It was just so… intoxicating. I could only deal with it so long before I was nearly debilitated by arousal. I tried to slow my breathing but could barely manage. It was so embarrassing, being turned on by my mother like that.

My conscious took over slightly and grabbed the collar of my shirt. ‘Smarten up goddess dammit!’ it roared at me. ‘That’s your mother you’re thinking about you maggot!’ it roared like a grisly old drill sergeant.

I bit my lip and shakily postured myself accordingly, though still shaky and heavily aroused. “Now take a shower and cool off,” my conscious spoke through my mouth. I nodded and quickly dropped my clothes, hopping into the cold shower.

The icy water immediately helped my urges, replacing them with a trembling cold sensations to my skin. I let out a relived sigh. “Better?” My conscious asked, again vocally.

“Yeah, a lot better,” I replied back with a relieved, yet chilled, sigh. The water splashed off my back and felt good, really good. I just didn’t know why that smell was so…

I shook my head, shaking off the thoughts that tried to return. Goddess only knows what ponies would think if I had sex with my mother.

The door to the washroom suddenly swung open. I peeked my head out the shower curtains. “I’m in her-“ I was cut off as a pair of lips connected to mine. “MGPMH!” I gasped, pulling back from the kiss.

My mother pushed me back gently and into the shower wall as she entered. My stomach sank as my heart nearly stopped. She leaned into my body, my bare skin rubbing against her fur, causing jolts of pleasure to course through my entire body.

‘STOP IT!’ My conscious roared and I tried to speak its words but Twilight cut me off as she wrapped one of her forelegs around my waist, holding me to the shower wall and kissed me again.

In a voice that was completely out of character for her, she spoke in an aroused tone. “It’s cold in here, maybe we should heat things up.” She again began kissing me and I tried to move but could barely manage.

“Mmph…” I pulled my head back. “MOM! What… what are you doing?!” I gasped, shocked, stunned, and kinda a little freaked out.

“I’m in heat… would you mind… cooling me off?” She asked, fluttering her eyes at me in a seductive way.

Finally, my conscious broke through. “MOM! We can’t do that! It’s… it’s…” I trailed off, completely freaked out about what was going on.

She stopped for a moment to think then gasped and quickly rushed off. For a moment I thought to myself but I could hear her sobs. My heart lurched. I had… I had hurt her feelings, I think.

“Oh… fuck!” I scowled, feelings tearing me apart. It wasn’t really her fault she was in heat… “THAT’S IT!” I said to myself. That was the smell in the house. It was a little different than the smell the cows gave off back on the farm I worked at, and for goddess knows whatever reason Twilight’s somehow aroused me. “Pheromones… I think they’re called,” I muttered to myself.

It wasn’t her fault she acted like this, not at all. There’d be cows on the farm that’d be the most timid, unsociable cows imaginable, that’d turn into the horniest, social butterflies in a heartbeat when their estrus kicked in. That must be what happened to my mom, and why she acted out like she had.

I flicked off the shower, the sounds of her crying reaching my ears in seconds. I felt so bad for her, but I was going to make it better. She needed to know it wasn’t her fault, and I was going to make it right.

I quickly dried off but didn’t redress myself and simply wrapped a towel around my waist. I rushed outside and saw Lassie, who quickly looked to me with a strange stare. “What happened?” Lassie asked. Rather than explain, I went back into the washroom and grabbed my wallet from my pants, then rushed back into the living room.

I tossed Lassie a Celestia bit. “Go get yourself something to eat, or whatever,” I told her and she smiled brightly then gave me a sloppy salute.

“You got it boss. OWL! Come hither!” She announced and Twilight’s pet owl fluttered down onto her shoulder. “I’m taking the owl with me,” she informed me then started her departure, muttering to Owlowiscious. “I swear if you shit on me…”

I didn’t pay her any mind and rushed up to my mother’s room, where she lay on her bed sobbing to herself. “Mom I-“ I began but she cut me off.

“Please, Evan, just leave,” she sobbed but I persisted.

“No, really, I need to-“ but she cut me short again, this time a bit more sternly.

“Just leave!” she ordered but I needed to tell her.

“Mom, I know that-“ but this time she looked to me angrily, or angered with sadness… I didn’t really understand emotions that well.

“LEAVE!” She sobbed heavily. “Please, just leave me alone,” she whimpered and began sobbing into her pillow again.

“No,” I told her but she threw a lamp at me. I dodged it and it shattered against the wall. “JESUS!” I gasped but she threw another object at me, of equal fragility. I pulled a Matrix and swung my upper body to the right, dodging the object, it too shattering against the wall.

“I can’t do this anymore Evan! I can’t keep trying to love you if you keep rejecting me!” She cried but I was confused.

“But I’m not rejecting you, I love you,” I told her but she shook her head.

“Not like that. I love you as more than my son… I want you to be my lover,” she told me. My stomach started to sink but I quickly remembered that she was in heat and probably not thinking straight.

“It’s okay mom, I know that estrus cycles do some pretty messed up-“ she cut me off again.

“No! It’s not my estrus. I love you. I’ve always loved you! But you just keep… keep…” she started to cry again.

“Wha… but… but I…” I trailed off, having no idea now if what she was saying was true, or just an effect of her heat cycle.

She slowly stood up and approached me. “I need to know… right now, the truth. Do you love me… will you love me, or is it just one way?” She asked and I got choked up on my words. This couldn’t be happening.

“I… I…” I couldn’t even think. Tears flowed down her face. I loved her yes, but… she was my mother and… that’s wrong. ‘No!’ my conscious told me but I quickly forced away the thought. I couldn’t do that to her. It’d break her heart. “Yes,” I said, not sure if it was true or not. One couldn’t just be forced into a scenario like this and decide in a heartbeat that they’ll love their own parent like this.

“Really?” she asked but I was silent, and she stifled a whimper. “You’re lying aren’t you?” Her whimpers built up and she began to sob, quickly backpedalling away from me.

In haste, and without any thought I quickly shortened the gap between us. She tried to push me away. “STOP! Just stop! I can’t do this anymore. I should’ve known this would happen, and I won’t let my heart be brok-“ I cut her short and connected our lips, having no other idea of what to do.

She blinked, her eyes wide, but she slowly relaxed and fell into a loving hug. I pulled away from the kiss. “I... I don’t know what to say. You’re my mother, and the thought of loving you as a lover never crossed my mind but… I love you too much to see your feelings hurt... and I'd do anything for you,” I told her as she smiled, though sadly, and a hiccup left her mouth.

“Really?” She asked and I nodded. She planted another kiss on my lips, which was followed by a longer one. Soon mouths opened together and our tongues began to wrestle one another.

That scent… her scent. It entered my nostrils, arousing me again, this time further than ever before. I knew it was just a primal urge but… ‘STOP! THAT’S YOUR MOTHER!’ My conscious roared but I’d have no part of it.

This whole fiasco was probably due to her hormones raging out of control, but if that’s what she wanted, it’s what I’d give her. She deserved that much. She pulled me down on the bed, still kissing me. She pulled her face away from mine and I kissed her neck, her back arching as she moaned. “Make love to me,” she whispered and I stopped.

“Uhh… ah… isn’t that ahh… a little, you know… taboo?” I asked sheepishly. She connected our lips briefly.

“Don’t worry, we won’t tell anypony,” she assured me. I still wasn’t a hundred percent on this but my own urges wanted me to do it. Even my mind was partially agreeing on this. Why now? Why now do my mental barriers, the very things that kept me from emotions all these years… why do they crumble now?

I nod, and she pulls our bodies closer. My hands run up and down her sides and she arches her back again, pressing into my bare chest. It feels… sensational, better than most things I had ever felt.

Her forehooves met the towel, the only piece of attire I had that gave me any decency. Rather slowly, she tugged it off, tossing it aside. “Are you sure?” I asked and she nodded.

“Evan, I’ve loved you for a long time, and I want this,” she told me and I bit my lip.

“Really?” I asked and she snickered.

“Didn’t you know? I made it kind of obvious that I liked you,” she informed me but I shook my head.

“No, I uh… never really caught on. Once or twice I thought maybe but I figured it was nothing,” I informed her and she tried to stifle a laugh but failed.

“You really are dense,” she giggled, wiggling her hips in an inviting way. My erect cock twitched in anticipation but I breathed heavily, nervously.

“I’ve uhh… I’ve never done something… like this before,” I whispered, a little embarrassingly. She rubbed her hoof across my chin.

“It’s okay, we’ll learn as we go,” she told me. My legs felt as if they’d give out from under me, as if they were made of jelly. With her beautiful body beneath me like this… it was debilitating and I could barely bring myself to move. “Take me, make me your mare,” Twilight said, almost enchantingly.

I leaned my body closer to hers, the fur of her body… tickling my skin. Tickling felt really good right now. And these specific tickles felt different from the ones before. The sensations nearly drove me over the edge, my right leg jerking slightly. A sudden thought came to mind. “Shouldn’t we… use a condom or something?” I asked nervously. She just blushed.

“I don’t think you can get me pregnant, not unless I wanted you to,” she informed me. It made me feel weird. Just her saying that reminded me that we were a completely different species, and in a way it was almost like something was saying we shouldn’t be together for that reason, but those thoughts quickly subsided as we kissed again.

“Are… are you… ready?” I asked and she nodded.

“The real question is: are you ready? Virginity is a special thing, meant for that special somepony.” she asked back and I gave a frightened look, afraid of the possible answer.

“I’ll never be more ready than I am now,” I whispered. She placed her forehooves at my sides, my own hands holding her as I slowly leaned my hips towards her. As the tip of my penis touched the entrance of her marehood, I stopped.

A small, almost electric, feeling gently buzzed down my entire shaft. This was exhilarating but terrifying at the same time. Very slowly I slid the tip of my cock into her, the pleasure immediately multiplying. I bit my lip and she giggled.

“You’re so cute… if only you could see your own face right now,” she commented. I looked into her eyes, my heart nearly melting.

“If only you could see yourself… you’re so beautiful,” I whispered back and she smiled bashfully, looking away briefly. I leaned my body into her more, sliding my manhood further inside of her, and slowly becoming one with her.

As I slid into her, my body shook a little more. Her pussy was so slick and wet that it made squeezing into her firm vagina a simple task. I felt something, almost like a fleshy wall, attempt to block me, but even with my slow speed, I accidentally broke past it.

Twilight flinched and whimpered in pain. I stopped. “Did I hurt you?” I asked worriedly, but she shook her head.

“It’s nothing, just keep going,” she ushered me. I continued to slowly slide into her, taking her inch by inch and savouring every bit of it. After what felt like a blissful eternity, the base of my erect cock met the folds of her vagina. I pushed a little more and our bodies shuddered from the absolutely unparalleled sensations that coursed through us from being united in this sacred bond.

She leaned her face into mine and gave me a sloppy kiss. We held the pose for several seconds before our lips parted, a strand of saliva connecting them. “I love you,” she whispered and I nodded.

“I think… I think I love you too,” I replied. I still wasn’t sure, this was just so sudden. I slowly leaned my hips back, sliding my cock out of her. As I left her hole, I was stunned to see blood. “GUH!” I gasped and Twilight looked down.

“It’s okay, it’s what’s supposed to happen when a mare does this for the first time,” she informed me and I gasped. She… she was… a… a… she spoke my mind and finished my statement. “You’ve taken mine, and I’ve taken yours. It’s very special for us both,” she said and again kissed me.

A coolness swept across my penis as a breeze fluttered by and cooled her pussy juices that were slicked on my erection. Slowly, but faster than when I had first penetrated her, I slid back into her warm, presenting marehood. The immediate warmth felt amazing.

My breath shuddered and our lips connected again, tongues battling each other. As I rocked my hips back, I slid my length from her alluring pussy, leaving only the head of my penis inside her. As I rocked my hips forwards with a slow pace, she matched me and rocked her hips into mine.

Our hips locked together and we began to slowly grind. Her inner muscles gently squeezed around my shaft making me moan deeply from the pleasurable feeling.

“Mmm, oh yes, rut me… oooh,” my mother moaned softly gently rocking back and forth against my cock. I started to match her movements, sliding away when she did, and slowly thrusting into her when she was rocking back into me.

My hands travelled down to her flanks, giving a light grope near her cutie marks. I rested my head into her neck, nibbling on the lobe of her ear. She bit her lip and inhaled sharply in pleasure.

This all felt so… weird and naughty but… really good. Wherever her body touched me it felt so… divine. She leaned her head away from mine slightly so that we could start kissing again.

Without warning, she latched her hindleg around my own leg and flipped our bodies, taking a dominant role. She closed her eyes and moaned loudly as she began to bounce atop of me. I tried my best but in this position it was hard to match her movements.

My hands at her sides, I noticed that she had protruding teats. Not large but the nipples were a little hard. I began to play with them, making her moan a little more often. “Oh buck yes, just like that,” Twilight moaned. Very gently, I gave each nipple a squeeze, making her squeal.

Twilight’s movements became quicker, hastened and not so fluent. Her inner walls started to clasp around my cock, adding to the pleasure I was enduring as I kept trying to thrust.

Twilight kept moaning louder and louder, any louder and somepony might think there was a murder. She whipped her head back, mane whip-lashing in the process, as she closed her eyes and started to stiffen.

I kept thrusting my cock into her. A thick gooey substance seeped out of her pussy, coating my penis and lathering my balls. The flapping sound of my testicles slapping against her flank cheeks were drowned out by her orgasmic screaming.

She seemed to be in a world of her own as she collapsed atop of me. I slowed down but Twilight whispered for me not to stop. Rather than pound away at her, I took a gentle and slow pace, slowly sliding in and out of her.

She cooed whispered moans of pleasure as I continued. That feeling just a few moments ago, when she was screaming and her vagina tightened around me. It felt wonderful and I wanted to do it again, but I wasn’t quite sure how or if I could make it happen.

There was a building pressure in my groin area. Twilight began to kiss at the side of my neck as she hummed moans of pleasure into my ear. “Mom… you feel so amazing,” I told her then moaned as I felt her inner vaginal muscles gently squeezing on my cock.

“Mmm… I love you so much Evan,” she told me, starting to thrust against my cock as we lay there making love. The feeling was so different to masturbation and so sensational I could barely keep the pressure subdued.

My erection started stiffening further. “Mom… I think… soon,” I whispered and she nodded, still moaning happily to herself. My hands moved from her teats and around her back, gripping her into a hug.

My abdominal region started to tighten, as butterflies seemed to start flying around inside my stomach. My legs started to twitch and jerk slightly. “Mom… I think… I’m gonna…” I trailed off in a grunt. I was so close now. I needed to pull out… I think.

I couldn’t cum inside my mother … could I? Would she be mad? She said I couldn’t get her pregnant… “Mom… I’m gonna cum,” I told her, hoping she’d tell me where to blow my load, instead she just kept moaning.

I wiggled, contemplating to pull out but being inside her was so enticing, I just couldn’t bring myself to pull out, even though I knew I should. I kept thrusting, a tingly feeling starting to buzz through my cock.

I bit my lower lip as I moaned, grunting slightly. I pulled her body in tight as I felt myself boiling over. Connecting our lips, I let my restraints fall. My hips jerked into hers, hilting myself inside her warm vagina. My cock stiffened and my first spurt launched inside her, splattering the insides of her pussy. I jerked again, a second spurt of equal potency lacing her insides. She gasped, probably feeling my sticky seed fill her. Her inner walls kept contracting against my cock, milking me for every drop.

My body just lay there, twitching and spasming involuntarily. My mother let out a relieved sigh. “Oh… I wish Mother’s Day came more than once a year,” she said with an exhale.

As she lifted her pussy off my penis, sparking sensations coursed through my cock. I was so sensitive and it just felt so good yet so… “Ahhh!” I gasped as my cock fell free from her insides.

Her love juices, mixed with my cum, and a little bit of blood, drizzled from her opening, and lathered itself all over my crotch. Twilight smiled. “Wow, you really filled me up,” she said with a seductive stare.

“I’m sorry, I should’ve pulled out,” I said, coming to my senses. I suddenly realized something grave. I just had sex with my mother, and I enjoyed every bit of it… my stomach sank.

Twilight leaned down and kissed me. “No, I liked the feeling. Maybe we could…” she trailed off and I felt a tingly feeling around my still somewhat erect cock. A magical aura was stroking my shaft. “Do it again?” She asked.

If my mind had been operating clearly, I may have said no… oh who the hell am I kidding?

* * *

Twilight’s perspective…

Evan swiftly grabbed my sides and flipped our bodies so fast that I let out a shocked gasp. Before I could even say a thing, his lips pressed against mine. This was out of character for him… WAY out of character, but I wasn’t about to object.

“Oh yes son, take me. Fill me again,” I said in the most sexy voice I could muster. Truth be told, it probably wasn’t the best seductive voice but it did the trick.

Evan gripped my sides, his penis now fully erect. Unlike the first time he had penetrated me, he thrusted himself inside of me with haste. The sudden feeling of him being inside me once again filled my nether region with warmth.

My pussy… ‘Oh my goddess… not even an hour into sexual intercourse and I’m speaking naughty words,’ I thought to myself cheekily. My pussy accommodated his girth, stretching around his cock and then quickly flexing against him.

Without control of our motions, I simply lay there as my man straddled me, rutting me like his mare… satisfying my heat. Moans of absolute pleasure left my mouth as my hips continually jerked against his.

That feeling, the feeling of an orgasm, started to return. A building feeling in my abdominal area. It was so much more intense than simple masturbation, and so much more sensual.

His hands still ran up and down my sides as he humped me, grunting and moaning every so often. He was so handsome and so caring… even if it was for different reasons than I wanted them to be.

My thoughts lingered back to how lucky I was, not in the way most say either. But in a literal sense. What as the chances that I’d cast that spell and it would affect him, bringing him here to Equestria from another dimension? And what were the chances that he would’ve became my faithful student? Pretty slim, but that’s how the events played out.

Sure he wasn’t perfect. He could be brash at times… and utterly dense as a brick all the time, but I nopony’s perfect and I loved him for who he was.

The building pressure in my nethers started to become too much to bear. I started to reach the brink of another orgasm and was unable to think of much anything other than sex.

Evan nestled his head into my neck, planting wet kisses down to my shoulder. His thrusting started to become more and more erratic. A thought popped into mind. “Evan?” I asked and he slowed himself to a stop. “This time… can we finish, together?” I asked and he nodded, breathing heavily.

“I’d… love that,” he stated through a huff. It was funny really. A physical specimen like himself, exhausted from a mere… maybe hour, of rutting. He began to slowly pump me again and I held back my simmering orgasm.

With the pleasure building so intensely, it was all I could do but hinge my legs around his back, squeezing him tightly against me and restricting a lot of his movements. His arms locked around my back.

I felt him inside me, his penis starting to stiffen more than it already as. He was as close as I was, maybe closer. “Guh… I…” he grunted. I began to thrust back at him wildly, driving my orgasm into motion.

Just as I hit my peak, I felt him stiffen inside me, followed by a hot sticky warmth that flooding into me in spurts, just like before. The feeling amplified my orgasm and my eyes rolled back as I entered a plateau of bliss.

My screams of pleasure was all I could hear but soon I couldn’t even muster basic vocal patterns and just lay there, shaking beneath him as he filled me yet again.

Unfortunately, like all good things, my orgasm settled and I was left breathless. Sure, that wasn’t quite like I had dreamed it to happen, but it was close enough and I’d never complain.

I felt Evan’s manhood slip out of me, and he cuddled into my lower region. “Evan?” I asked but gasped as I felt his lips gently suckling on my teats. I let out a sigh and rubbed his head affectionately. ‘Stallions… err, men,’ I thought to myself as I rolled my eyes and shook my head with a smirk on my face. "That's it honey... mommy loves you," I told him.

I felt a drowse encase me as I lay there with Evan suckling on my teats like a foal. A smile crossed my face and that was really the last thing I remembered…

* * *

Third person…

Lassie paw-pumped the air with a silent 'YES!' as she secretly peeped on her two friends. “I told you I was good,” she told the owl on her back.

“Who,” it replied with one of its few vocal patterns.

“Me… she’s been at this what? Six… seven, eight months?... Nine? She even had Princess Cadence, goddess of love or whatever, try and put a magic spell on him to make him fall in love but he was so dense it didn’t work… but me, I can make it work!” She announced.
“Who,” the owl said again.

“Me! I’m like… the puppy of love,” Lassie said in a suave voice then looked down to see Evan, his face nestled into Twilight’s teats like a napping baby foal. “Okay… so it’s still creepy as hell that he considers her his mom but… boo-yah baby, just like this, uh-huh!” Lassie stood on her hind paws and began to hump the air like a horn dog.

She looked back inside one more time before she left. “I just wish I had a video of that… that was hot… oh well, mental memory,” Lassie muttered to herself as she trotted away with semi-grace.

* * *

Fillydelphia...
A lone, shadowy, bipedal figure walked up to a lone newspaper stand. "Hey buddy," the woman asked and the stallion operating the stand looked over to her.

"What can I do yah for missy?" the stallion asked.

"I'm looking for somepon... err, something," she replied. "Have you ever released a newspaper 'bout something like me. Bipedal, masculine, but a bit taller?" she asked and the stallion furrowed his brows.

"Lady... I ain't no information kiosk," the stallion replied but the woman tossed a large bag of bits on his counter. His eyes went wide.

"Well... now that you mention it... a few months back there was a big story about the new princess, Princess Twilight Sparkle, tutoring a student that was from a completely different world or something... he was pretty big, like you said," the stallion informed her and she nodded, tossing more bits onto the counter.

"That's what I like to hear... say, you an upstanding citizen?" she asked and the stallion nodded somewhat. "If a detective sent from Celestia asked you where you sent me, you'd tell him the truth right?" she asked and he gulped.

"Uhh... ye-yes... that'd be the right thing to do right?" he asked, somewhat nervously.

"Of course. Stay righteous to the law friend," she said encouragingly. As she turned away, the stallion closed his eyes and let out a relieved exhale. For a brief moment, he thought things would've went sour for him. As he looked back up, his eyes went wide as he saw the woman pointing a scary piece of metal at him.

A fairly loud gunshot echoed through the town, the 9mm bullet ripping a clean hole right through his skull. His body jerked as the life was abruptly ripped out of him, blood spurting out both the entry and exit holes. His body lay, slumped in his chair, as the woman walked away from his deceased corpse. "You might have been in the special forces... but now I know where you are," the woman said as if she was speaking to the man she was hunting down.

Author's Note

Yes... I know, it took forever to get this chapter out. Hopefully (fingers crossed) I'll have the next chapter out in a day or two.

Chapter 30

‘Oh goddess… oh goddess, that actually happened…’

Evan’s Perspective,

Monday, May 11th, 2014…

I awoke semi-peacefully, a strange aroma catching my sense of smell. As I awoke, I recalled a messed up…

My stomach sank. Beside me was my mother, sleeping contently. I looked down, realizing that I was naked, and that there was stains all in the bed sheets, and dried sex fluids on my mother’s fur.

“Oh goddess… oh shit… oh fuck, ohfuckohfuck… shit!” I whispered frantically. In the state of debilitating arousal that I was in, and my mother being in heat… “Oh my goddess… oh no… oh nonononono… oh man… this is bad… really bad…” I said frantically as I quickly and quietly sat up.

I knew that when cows were in heat, they acted out differently… but I had no idea what my mom would act like this morning. Would she be mad at me… oh goddess, I know we’re a different species and she said I couldn’t get her pregnant but, oh man I feel a bit nauseas.

Vivid visuals of us having sex resurfaced in my mind. “Oh man… oh man, oh please… this has to be a bad dream,” I whimpered fearfully. I just had this really, really, really bad feeling about this… I mean REALLY BAD feeling.

My heart began to race and I feverishly paced around. Oh man, I was in SOOO much trouble, I just knew it. I had that feeling… like the one you get as a child when you do something bad and you just know you’re in trouble, big trouble.

Butterflies flickered around in my stomach as I began to get light headed. “Oh… oh goddess…” I stammered as I quickly paced down the stairs. ‘Maybe… maybe she won’t remember… if I’m not around, maybe she won’t know,’ I thought to myself but my conscious scoffed at me.

‘You’re disgusting. First you fuck your mother, then you try to deny you did it,’ it told me, forcing me into a deeper sense of fear. ‘I told you to leave it, but NOOO, you just had to think with your dick. Don’t you listen to anything I tell you?’ It lectured me.

I quickly pushed away my thoughts as I rushed downstairs to my room and slipped on a pair of blue jeans, a white v-neck, my religious cross necklace, my watch and a pair of socks. “Fresh air… fresh air will help,” I said, rushing back upstairs and grabbing my wallet.

Spike was on the couch, napping contently. ‘Oh no… he doesn’t know… does he? When did he get home? I didn’t hear him come in,’ I wondered fearfully.

“Whatcha doin?” Asked a voice from behind me, scaring me to the point that I nearly jumped out of my skin.

“GAH!” I gasped, spinning around defensively. Lassie sat there on her haunches, looking up to me with a smile, tongue hanging out as she panted happily. “Lassie, I swear I didn’t do it!” I pleaded my innocence.

She furrowed her brow. “Didn’t do what?” She asked confusedly.

“Uh… nothing, wanna go out for breakfast?” I asked her and she immediately shot up to all fours, tail whirling around.

“OH YEAH!” She let out a whooping cheer.

“Sssh!” I hushed her and she again gave me a confused look. I quickly thought up an excuse. “It’s early and everypony’s still sleeping,” I told her and she grabbed my right arm, yanking it down and looking at my watch.

“It’s like… six in the morning. I don’t think they’ll mind,” she noted but I still hushed her as I grabbed my boots and slipped them on along with my duster coat. Very quietly, and discreetly, my faithful canine companion and I left the premises.

“So, where we goin?” Lassie asked enthusiastically. Truthfully, I hadn’t really gotten that far in my thoughts, I just needed to make an escape to think of an excuse to tell my mother when she woke up.

“Uhm… how bout…” I thought to myself. The early morning dew on the ground, the distance rising sun, the smell of fresh air… it all reminded me of working on the farm back home… well, minus trying to run from the fact I just had sex with my mother.

All the thoughts brought up memories of having Tim Hortons with my boss. “Tim Horsetons sound good?” I asked and Lassie’s smile grew wider.

“Oh yeah, last one there’s buying!” She zipped off.

“HEY!” I yelled out, chasing after her, but there was no way I’d catch her. Even if I did beat her, she had no money and would make me pay for it anyway. We zipped along the damp morning roads of Ponyville.

In a matter of minutes, we reached the fast food establishment. “HA-HA! The canine crosses the finish line first, AND THE CROWD GOES WILD… AHHHH!” Lassie cheered and I just rolled my eyes.

“Yeah, but you’d have made me buy anyway,” I muttered and she just nudged into me.

“Aww… don’t be a sore loser. Not everypony can be as good as me,” she said boastfully. Man, she must’ve been hanging out with Dash last night.

“Yeah yeah… don’t let it go to your head dog,” I quipped, holding open the door for her. She quickly walked up to the counter with grace. That mare that had served me last time, I couldn’t remember her name, was still the cashier.

“Morning,” Lassie greeted her and her face went pale. “What?” Lassie asked, looking behind herself and to me, then back to her. “You see a ghost?” Lassie asked and the mare gulped. I spoke up to break he tension she probably had.

“Morning Ms… uh, sorry, I forgot your name,” I greeted.

“M-M-Mary,” she stammered in disbelief.

I reached out my hand to greet her again. “Sorry, I forgot your name. You served me last time I was in,”

“Yes, I remember. You were very laid back… the dog talks?” She asked and Lassie pipped up in an annoyed tone.

“The dog, has a name, and that name is Lassie,” my friend complained and I just sighed with a heartwarming smile.

“Yeah, don’t get her started,” I told Mary. Lassie spoke up.

“Yeah, and LASSIE, would like a BELT, a coffee, two cream one sugar, and some hash browns, please.” Mary, still couldn’t believe her ears but quickly typed it in.

“And may I please have… a dozen doughnuts, a large chocolate milk and… a BELT as well please,” I ordered. She typed it in and… “A hundred and twenty three bits?” I asked in disbelief as she handed me the bills, several things wrong with the order.

“UGH! Oh… I’m sooo sorry. I’m not very good at this,” she stated, taking back the order and retyping it. “So that was two BELTs… a dozen doughnuts, a coffee, two cream one sugar and an order of hash browns?” She asked timidly but Lassie shook her head.

“No, no… a lot of hash browns. Ask in... like twenty,” she ordered and the mare looked to her with a raised eyebrow. I waved my hand.

“Don’t ask,” I informed her and she typed it in, though the bill still came to forty two bits, mostly due to Lassie’s order of hash browns. I passed over forty five bits.

“Keep the change,” I said with a wink. She smiled and checked it through.

Lassie and I took a seat nearby. “Ooh… smooth moves Casanova,” Lassie commented and I raised an eyebrow.

“Huh?” I asked curiously.

“Man, you… you, you… you’re good,” she kept pointing her index paw digit at me.

“Good at what?” I asked innocently.

“Man, the whole ‘Keep the change’. Only you could pull that off flirtatiously and make it work. Anypony else would’ve looked like a goon,” she commented and I retorted immediately.

“It was not flirtatious!” I hissed quietly and she laughed briefly.

“HA! Yeah okay… well, maybe you didn’t mean to make it flirtatious but… ooh, she likes you,” Lassie giggled and I blushed.

“She does not. She just likes it when customers are polite and easy going,” I commented back and Lassie snickered, stifling a laugh.

“Ooookay… so that must be the reason she’s eyeing you up right?” She asked. I looked out of pure curiosity. As I looked, our eyes met and she quickly looked away bashfully with a flush hue of red across her cheeks.

Lassie tapped my foot with her hindpaw. “Told yah so!” She giggled and I looked away timidly.

“She… that doesn’t mean anything,” I said and Lassie sighed as she rolled her eyes.

“Okay then Mr. Dense. Sooo… any other mares that you’ve subdued lately?” She asked and I gasped.

“I’ll have you know I’m not a man whore!” I hissed at her and she rolled her eyes.

“Fine… Rarity, Mary, several other mares…" she trailed off and looked to me coyly. "Twilight,” she added in mischievously.

I tried to gasp but my voice got choked up. “I… I… how do you know… I mean, nothing happened between us!” I snapped and she just laughed then made lewd motions.

“Uh… ugh, mom, you’re pussy is so tight… ugh!” She made jerky motions then acted like she was having an orgasm. “And she was probably like ‘Yes son, fill me with your seed!’” As she rose her paw to her head and acted like she was having a mind blowing orgasm that took her breath away. I peeked to make sure Mary didn’t think we were retarded, but by the looks of things, she didn’t even notice what was happening.

“Lassie! You were watching?!” I asked cursedly. She stifled a short laugh.

“Uhhh, yeah! That was hot dude, especially when your cum was oozing out of her contracting pussy,” Lassie commented and I looked away.

“Stop it, let’s talk about something else… and don’t you dare tell anypony!” I hissed.

“Lips…” she trailed off and made the motion like she was zippering her mouth shut. “Are sealed,” she told me with a wink.

“So… how can you talk?” I asked, bringing up a question that confused just about everypony. “I mean… I know that you move your tongue while your vocal cords do stuff and words come out but… I mean, how come you can talk but other dogs can’t?” I asked and Lassie shrugged.

“I dunno. It was probably just written into the script,” she told me and I furrowed my brows.

“Huh?” I asked and she just brushed her paw at me.

“Forget about it. I don’t even know how I talk, so for now it’s a mystery,” she told me. Seconds later, Mary came over and set about our order.

“Thanks,” I said with a tip of my non-existent hat. She smiled and pulled up a chair.

“May I?” She asked and Lassie set some of her hash browns aside on another plate for her.

“The more the merrier,” Lassie invited her. Mary nodded pleasantly and took a seat then looked to me.

“Thank you for being so easy going. Most ponies get agitated when I constantly get their orders wrong,” she partly thanked me, and partly apologized.

I brushed my hand casually. “Meh… it’s cool. Getting mad about something won’t make it better any faster,” I chuckled. She nodded with a smile.

The three of us sat alone in peace for probably the better chunk of an hour, conversing about mostly useless stuff. “Well, I really should get back to the cash register, ponies will be arriving anytime now,” she said, standing up and offering me her hoof to shake.

“Well, it was good chatting with you again Mary. Take it easy eh,” I offered her peace of mind and quickly shook her hoof. With that I looked to Lassie, whom looked content for the time being.

Still not wanting to face my fears, I decided perhaps I could go see a friend. “Oh hey Mary, can I get a couple muffins?” I asked. I quickly stood up and walked over to the counter, buying about thirty muffins and paying for them correctly.

“Thanks, I’ll see you later,” I gave her a nod and both Lassie and I left the establishment and began walking along with peace.

“So who’s the muffins for?” Lassie asked.

“Derpy. We’re gonna go give her a visit,” I stated and Lassie squealed with delight.

“Oh man! I love that mare, she’s so goofy!” She announced and I scowled at her.

“Lassie, that’s not polite. Derpy is a wonderful mare!” I scorned her and she flinched, her tail whipping up between her legs.

“Sorry… I didn’t mean it like that. I meant it like she’s really playful and innocently loving, like a foal,” she apologized.

I sighed, “It’s okay… just maybe think about what you’re going to say before you say it. It might not come out the way you meant it to,” I told her and she smirked.

“Jeeze… I never took you for a lecturer,” she joked and I just rolled my eyes. Within minutes, we reached the outskirts of Ponyville, and the hospital where Derpy was still residing until she recovered.

We approached the front doors but I stopped. “How do I get in? Redheart will still be looking for me,” I stated and Lassie just shrugged, pointing to the laundry line with drying hospital gowns, speaking her mind.

“I think I just came up with the most foolproof method of entry…”

* * *

Third person…

A disproportionately tall figure stepped into the hospital entrance, being roughly seven and a half feet tall, but very lanky. Ponies immediately took notice of the strange creature that had a face of a dog, but it’s identity was concealed by a little black eye mask.

The creature’s pace was mostly consisting of swaying, it’s body so disproportionate that its height hindered its coordination with walking. “Bend at the knees a bit more, we’re too high and ponies are noticing,” the creature said.

The knees bent and the creature lowered slightly. “Maybe you should hunch at the back,” said a voice from inside the hospital gown that concealed the creature’s body.

“I’m not gonna look like a hunchback!” The main voice hissed. The body started staggering a bit as its body balance was tipped off kilter.

“Steady...” said the voice from inside the gown.

“Well if you would stop staggering around!” Said the main voice.

Nurse Redheart trotted up behind it. “Can I help you… madam?” she asked and the voice from inside the coat gasped.

“Shit…” and Redheart raised a brow.

“Excuse me?” She asked.

“Uhm… sorry about my vulgarity… I have a severe case of… ugh… diarrhea… and I don’t know… oh goddess… I need the washroom!” Said the main voice and Redheart immediately pointed over to a hallway.

“Down that hallway, third door on your right... ma’am… err… sir?” She said, unable to depict if the creature was male or female.

“Thanks,” said the main voice and the figure rushed off, hospital gown flapping. Redheart raised a most curious eyebrow as she noticed the legs were covered in jeans, and ended rather low for the creature’s massive height. But a tail protruded down from up higher on the body, wagging to and fro.

As the creature ran off, the figure hit it's head off a low hanging light. "OW, HEY WATCH IT!" the main voice yelped.

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…

We reached the stairwell fairly quickly and immediately removed the hospital gown that Lassie had filched from the laundry line. “I can’t believe that actually worked,” I muttered and Lassie chuckled.

“You don’t always have to use a cardboard box, you can sometimes just use a disguise,” Lassie commented and I just shook my head with a sigh.

“Come on, let’s go see Derpy,” I motioned and we quickly rushed up the stairs. Stealthily sneaking through the stairwells and hallways, we reached Derpy’s room, or at least where she was last time.

Quietly sneaking into the room, we closed the door behind us. I looked over and saw Derpy, looking out the window with an empty stare, probably lonely. “Hey Derpy, how’s it going?” I asked, her eyes immediately shifting over to me.

Her face immediately brightened as a bright smile crossed her face. “Hi Evan, it’s so good to see you!” She seemed to gleam with a brightness from just her happiness alone. I casually took a seat beside her medical bed, Lassie sitting beside me on her haunches.

Lassie extended her paw. “Nice to see you again Derpy,” Lassie commented and Derpy shook her paw.

“You too Lassie,” Derpy replied. I pulled out the bags of muffins and Derpy’s eyes went wide. “Are… are those for… for me?!” She asked joyfully. I nodded and she pulled me into a tight hug, giving me a peck on the cheek. “OH THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!” She had an outburst of happiness.

“No problem Derpy. I know you like muffins and besides… I couldn’t let you perish here with the junk they feed you,” I joked and Derpy kept smiling as she opened up of the bags.

“Wow… there’s a lot of muffins in here. Do you want some too?” She asked but both Lassie and I shook our heads, speaking at the exact same time.

“Nah, we already ate,” we both said together.

“Jinx,” Lassie said, tapping me in the leg with a gentle punch. “Now you owe me a soda,” she laughed and Derpy giggled.

“Thank you. This really means a lot to me,” Derpy said as she began to wolf back muffins like they were going out of style fast. After several seconds, Lassie leaned over to me.

“Jeeze, I’ve never seen somepony eat so many muffins,” she muttered and I just smirked with a stifled laugh that sounded like a rough sneeze.

“Yeah, but I’ve seen you eat more Italian food,” I quipped and Lassie just rolled her eyes. After a few minutes, Derpy stopped eating her muffins, setting a bag aside, probably for later.

She looked to me. “So how have you been?” She asked and I just shrugged.

“Not bad,” I replied, trying not to think about what I was running from. “How have you been… I mean, not considering the busted wing?” I asked and she just shrugged unknowingly.

“I dunno. Pretty good when you’re around but… I get lonely lots,” she stated. I just sighed. I felt bad for her, truly I did. Mostly because it was due to something I did that put her in here.

“I’m sorry Derpy… about what happened. I didn’t mean for what happened to happen,” I told her but she just smiled and took me into a hug.

“It’s okay,” she said, rubbing my back with her hooves. I began to stroke her back as well. “Everypony makes mistakes,” she said and we held the hug for several more seconds before breaking apart.

As I sat back, I noticed a Daring Do book, namely the one that portrayed me as a berserk ape and made her look like the good guy, even though that’s not at all what had happened.

“You like Daring Do?” I asked and Derpy looked over to the story.

“Yeah, it’s pretty good. I like the parts where she always figures out a way in the end, like she always knows what to do,” she said and I wanted to scoff at the story. I was ready to tell her what really happened, but then remembered that Dash had said she wasn’t real.

‘I wonder if she’s like… a secret agent of the museum with a secret identity that nopony knows… so why write stories?’ I wondered and my thoughts began to wander. Before long I noticed Derpy had brought out a small game board and set it on the nightstand.

It looked like a maze with walls, and holes… “Oh goddess…” I muttered, knowing exactly what game it was.

“It’s a really fun game. It’s called Labyrinth, wanna play?” She asked and I smiled with a laugh.

“Okay, but I’m not very good,” I informed her but she waved an assuring hoof.

“It’s okay, neither am I,” she said, setting a metal marble in the ‘Start’ location. Using the little knobs, she tilted the table and began to roll the marble along, but sank it on the third hole.

“Rats!” She cursed her luck and offered me the controls. I retrieved the metal marble from the little space it rolls out of and started, but got sank in the first hole.

“Oh for…” I refrained from swearing, but before I could hand the controls back to Derpy, Lassie took control and started, but only made it to the fourth hole.

“GUH… dammit!” Lassie swore mildly. The three of us sat for… what must’ve been hours, trying to play the game, but failing pretty miserably. However, that being said, after a little while, we got to know exactly how to tilt the table at certain parts, getting further and further after learning how to play.

I kinda figured Derpy, being the tactical game tactician she was, would’ve won, but to my utter surprise Lassie let out a whooping cheer as she made it to the finish first. “AHHH YEAH! What?! That’s right!" Lassie cheered her victory, paw pumping the air in victory. "Oh man, that was fun!” Lassie said with a sigh as she settled.

I looked to my watch, seeing that it was nearly noon. We had been here for several hours doing this, and had finally succeeded. Well, one of us had succeeded anyway. Derpy looked over. “Now try it backwards,” she offered and Lassie smiled.

“That’d be unreal,” she complied but I set my hand on her shoulder.

“Maybe later Lassie. Sorry Derpy but we have to go before a nurse finds me. I’m still wanted by them,” I joked and Derpy gave a pouty face.

“Oh… okay. But come back soon, please,” she asked and I nodded, giving her a tight hug.

“Promise, Tail Twist Swear,” I replied, bumping flanks, then stood up and looked to the door. Just as we went to leave, the door began to open, a rolling food tray begin pushed by a pony entering the room…

* * *

Third person

Several minutes later…

The pony pushed the food cart back into the kitchen and casually parked it in the corner. “We need some Brussels sprouts, mashed potatoes and cooked carrots,” the pony operating the cart ordered. The chefs immediately went to it and the pony that was pushing the cart, left to use the washroom.

The drape on the cart moved aside and Lassie snuck out from underneath it, having snuck into it with Burdy without the cart pony noticing while he was serving Derpy. Lassie grabbed a frying pan and stalked up behind a chef.

She very graciously clanked him in the back of the head, not hard and rather quietly. She quickly stripped his clothes without another chef noticing and stuffed his bare body in a pantry cupboard, figuring somepony would find him or he’d simply wake up.

She slipped on the disguise, put a sanitary face mask on, put a few empty plates on the cart then pushed the cart along and out of the kitchen. As she made for the hospital exit, a doctor stopped her.

“Excuse me, where are you going?” the doctor asked and Lassie gulped but quickly thought up an excuse.

“I need some specific ingredients for a patient who is allergic to most of our menu, and I need to go to the grocery mart to pick it up… if you don’t mind,” Lassie said and the doctor nodded, stepping aside and lettering her proceed.

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…

The cart began bouncing along and I peeked out the drapes. We were bombing down a hill at increasing speeds. “LASSIE!” I gasped. She had said once we were outside she’d tell me so I could get out. But now we were flying down a hill, and I was still inside the cart.

“Sush, this is awesome!” She hushed me as we nearly flew into the streets of Ponyville with the hospital cart. Lassie tried to navigate through the pony pedestrians. “IF THIS THING HAD A HORN I’D BE HONKING IT AT YOU!” Lassie yelled out, ponies looking back and swiftly leaping out of the way.

“LASSIE! SLOW DOWN!” I yelled but it was too late. As we neared the library, Lassie couldn’t slow the cart to a stop before we reached the library property. The cart was brought to an abrupt stop as the wheels slammed into a rock, and I was propelled from the insecure inside of the cart.

My body was flung through a window, my body mass, added with the momentum, smashed me through the window. Glass shards littered the floor. “DOG… YOU’RE CLEANING THIS MESS!” I yelled out and Lassie’s head peaked through the broken window.

“WOAH! That was sooo AWESOME!” Lassie announced and I just groaned. Easy for her to say. I stood up, more glass shards falling from my body. Lassie raced through the front door.

“Dog… hurry up and clean this before…” I trailed off. Generally when this sort of thing happened, my mom would come rushing down feverishly, thinking I had hurt myself badly. Instead… not even Spike had come to see what had happened.

“Before what?” Lassie asked.

“Where’s… mom and Spike?” I asked but Lassie just shrugged.

“Ah dunno. I was out with you. But here’s the easy way to figure out,” she informed me, standing to her hindlegs and bringing her paws to her lips to funnel her voice. “TWILIGHT! SPIKE! WHERE ARE YOU?!” She yelled out, almost loud enough to deafen me.

I tilted my head away from her, scrunching the entire right side of my face in agitation for how loud she had yelled. Lassie looked back to me. “Maybe they’re out right now,” Lassie stated and I just sighed.

“Well, regardless, clean up this mess you made,” I ordered her and she showed me her paws, wiggling her paw digits.

“How?” she pouted innocently. “I have no opposable thumbs,” she gave a pouty face and I gave her a blank terminator stare.

“Ah’ve seen you hol' stuff before. Dun’t give me dat,” I told her in an Arnie accent and she just frowned.

“Fine!” She pouted like a child that wasn’t getting her way. She grabbed a broom and began brushing the glass into a pile. “Grab a dustpan, this was partially your fault, cause it was your body that smashed through the window,” she told me.

Seeing as how my body wouldn’t have smashed through the window if she wasn’t goofing around, I didn’t see how that was my problem, but I grabbed the dustpan anyway and we swept up the mess.

I dumped the glass into a garbage bag and stowed it away. Looking back to the busted window, I sighed. “We’re gonna have to cover that up,” I said and Lassie just laughed.

“Wayyyyy a head of yah,” she said, pulling out several dictionaries and taping them together with duct tape.

“LASSIE! Don’t deface-“ I simply sighed as she wouldn't listen and taped together a window sized block of dictionaries then sealed the window with it. “Lassie… those were mom’s. I don’t think-“ but Lassie cut me off.

“Oh who cares? Nopony actually uses dictionaries. They use thesauruses,” she stated and I just groaned. I could tell mom wasn’t going to be impressed.

“Ach… whatever,” I groaned walking up the stairs and to the balcony. I set out a lawn chair an flumped down, Lassie following suit.

“So?” Lassie asked as she looked over to me. I raised an eyebrow.

“So?” I asked and she rolled her eyes.

“I dunno, tell me something,” she said and I thought to myself.

“Something,” I replied coyly and she huffed.

“Okay, I’ll start. I’m a talking dog, and that creeps ponies out for some reason, even though there’s talking donkeys and dragons and… well etcetera. I never knew my parents and my earliest memories were of you raising me up,” she said.

“But that was only a few months ago. Yeah, why exactly did you age so fast?” I asked and she snickered. “What?” I asked curiously.

“Says the guy with grey hair,” she laughed and I furrowed my brow then shuffled the sides of my hair, being somewhat self-conscious that when my hair grew long enough, the sides of my hair grayed.

“I… no seriously. It usually takes a year or two for a puppy to grow to full size. I know you weren't a complete puppy when I got you, but you still grew faster than normal,” I stated and she raised an eyebrow with a mused smile.

“Do I strike you as a normal dog?” She asked rhetorically.

“True… okay then,” I said and she smiled.

“Your turn. Tell me something about you,” she suggested.

I rubbed my chin. “Well… I’m the son and faithful student of a princess in Equest-“ but Lassie cut me short.

“Nah-nah-nah… not that kinda stuff. I wanna know about stuff I wouldn't know. You know, stuff like: what goes on inside your head, or your foalhood, or whatever you as a human call it.”

I scratched my forehead. “Well… okay. I was born in this place called Canada, in another… dimension or something. I was… an average person, but a little bigger. People were kinda scared of me and didn’t talk to me much unless they actually knew me or were hanging around someone who knew me,” I informed my canine friend.

“You, scary? WHY?” She asked jokingly. I just rolled my eyes. She cracked her knuckles and stretched. “Well… uhm, I sometimes think you’re a goon, but it’s pretty funny most of the times,” she stated and I just laughed

“I think you’re a little outlandish and ridiculous, but only sometimes is it unbearable,” I told her and she took a teasing offense to it, placing her left paw on her chest.

“Me? Unbearable? Never,” she laughed then rubbed her chin. “I can talk, but I’m not exactly sure why or how. I have only a few memories of when I was young before I met you but it’s mostly just blurred and I’m being dropped off in a basket at that timid yellow pegasus’s doorsteps,” she informed me.

“Well… uhm… ahem,” I coughed. “Uhm, I was born in Winnipeg, Manitoba, but after about three years, my mom went to see a wedding in Ontario and… we just never went back,” I said and Lassie raised an eyebrow.

“What do you mean ‘never went back’?” she asked.

“Well… my mom just decided that rather than go back to our house in Winnipeg… she’d just stay at my grandmother’s place in Ontario.” I said and she rubbed her chin.

“How far are those places apart?” She asked and I shrugged.

“About a two or three day drive. You could do it faster if you kept driving nonstop but, that’s the average at a hundred kilometers an hour,” I said and Lassie’s eyes went wide.

“Woah… that’d be like just going to a Wedding in Appleloosa and deciding not to come back,” she said and I nodded. She rubbed her chin. “Hmm… well, there’s not much else I could really tell you that you don’t already know… but I do wanna know more about you. Any pets before me?” She asked and I nodded. “Where they as awesome as me?” She asked and I rolled my eyes.

“That all depends. They were… well, let’s just say they weren’t like you,” I began. “My first dog ever was around when I was a little too young to remember. But my mom said I’d always go wandering off with her early in the morning and never come back until late in the evening. Mom said it always scared the hell outta her,” I informed Lassie whose ear flapped in interest.

“What was her name?” Lassie asked.

“Marley,” I replied and Lassie rose an eyebrow.

“Marely eh. And you say she was around since before you could remember? Damn she must be an old coot now,” she laughed and I sighed.

“She... died actually… she always used to run out the lane way when she’d she my dad’s blue truck pull in. Ran out when she saw a blue truck one day and got smoked. Driver brought the dog to my mom and apologized. My mom buried her in front of the house when I was having my afternoon nap, and told me when I woke up. She said I cried for days.” A lone tear trickled down my face as blurry memories rekindled themselves. I couldn’t remember much, other than she was a tri-colored mutt that was mostly golden, and kinda like a Labrador in size.

“Oh…” Lassie trailed off and placed a paw on my hand. “I’m sorry.”

I sighed and patted her paw. “It’s okay. I can’t dwell on it forever,” I stated then continued. “The next dog I had was one that was at my grandmother’s place when we moved. I remember him a lot more. He was a black Labrador named Buddy… kinda mean too,” I replied and Lassie sucked in her lips.

“Oh?” She asked and I shrugged.

“Well… that is to say, he wasn’t exactly friendly… except to me. He bit everyone in the family at least once… except me. We’d always go out walking together and I used to feed him peanut butter and honey sandwiches,” I told her and Lassie began to snicker.

“Peanut butter eh? You don’t say. You know that stuff is hard to get off the roof of your mouth,” she laughed and I just shrugged.

“He didn’t seem to mind,” I replied and Lassie giggled.

“So… whatever happened to him?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“I don’t know to tell you the truth. When I was about seven or so, he just disappeared one night and never returned. Maybe he ran away, got hit by a truck, eaten by coyotes… it’ll be a mystery I will never solve,” I stated and Lassie looked down.

“Man… I don’t know what’d be worse, knowing they’re dead… or not knowing if they are,” she said and I rolled my eyes.

“Well… needless to say I didn’t cry as much, I always told myself as a kid that he ran off and is free in the wild somewhere, probably living up in the mountains with a den behind the waterfall,” I said, another trickling tear leaving my eye.

“Well… that’s one way to deal with it I guess.” Lassie stated and I nodded.

“Yeah, then there was Ally. Her name was spelled A-l-l-y, but pronounced like Alley,” I told her and she perked up her ears.

“Oh, another one, how many more are there?” She asked.

“Just you,” I told her and Lassie rubbed her paws.

“Saved the best one for last eh?” she asked with a wink and I just stifled a snicker and rolled my eyes.

“Definitely,” I joked, rubbing her head.

“Well, go on. Tell me about this ‘Ally’ fellow,” Lassie inquired.

“Well… when I was about eleven, I wanted another dog but my mom wouldn’t let me have one because… well she just wouldn’t,” I told her and Lassie piped up.

“Because she was a drunk bitch?” Lassie joked.

“Lassie! That’s not nice,” I scorned her and she whipped her tail between her legs and whimpered.

“Sorry, it just sorta slipped, honestly,” she apologized and I sighed.

“It’s okay… just uh, easy on the language… yeah, something a little like that. Basically she just didn’t want a dog but I did, but she overruled me so… no dog. But eventually one day, when I was eleven, I went to visit my uncle-“ but as I told the story, Lassie interrupted me.

“Which uncle is this?” She asked quickly.

“My Uncle Justin,” I replied and she nodded then let me proceed.

“Anyway, I went there to visit him and there was this dog outside on a leash and I didn’t think much of it at the time. Anyway, as I was talking with my uncle, his friend came home and let the dog inside and she immediately came over to me and began to lick my face… and I just sat there and let her.” I continued the story.

“You know where us dogs lick ourselves, right?” she asked and I just stifled a quick laugh.

“Yeah, but that’s beside the point. Anyway, the guy said that he only had the dog because he had rescued her from a drug den where she was being abused, and was shocked that she actually took a quick liking to me. So anyway, he asked if I wanted her because he said the only reason he was keeping her was because he didn’t want her going back, but at the same time couldn’t really afford to keep her,” I continued the story further.

“So in the end we talked my mom into letting us take her home and she was… really special to me. Kinda funny too. She showed expertise in hunting racoons and waterfowl even though she had no prior training,” I informed Lassie.

“So whatever happened to her?” Lassie asked and I sighed, the question striking a deep nerve.

“I… I…” I trailed off and bit my lip. “I don’t really know,” I replied and Lassie rolled her eyes.

“Another: dog ran off in the night and never returned?” she asked but I shook my head.

“No… I… I actually don’t know what happened to her,” I replied and Lassie rolled her eyes.

“Man, it’s okay. Just cause she never came home, doesn’t mean you have to dwell on the thought of what happened to her,” Lassie tried to assure me.

“It’s not that. She never ran away from home,” I informed Lassie who raised a brow.

“So if she didn’t… not come home, then how do you not know what happened to her?” She asked, confused and curious.

“Because…” I took a deep inhale, a tear trickling down my cheek. “Because I never came home,” I stifled a sob and Lassie gave a confused look.

“What the hell do you mean you never went… OOHHH… I’m sorry, I…” she trailed off, realizing what I had meant. I harboured my feelings and buried them deep.

Waving my hand at her, I assured her I didn’t take offence. “It’s okay Lassie… it’s just that… that… that…”I trembled on my words, my emotions boiling over.

Lassie took me into a hug. “Sssh… sssh… it’s okay, let it all out,” Lassie cooed. I began to weep, though not loudly, as tears poured from my eyes and down my cheeks.

“I promised her the morning I left for work… that I’d be home that night… to take her for a walk… and she was so happy and excited…” I sobbed remorsefully, hating myself for not being able to finish my last promise to her.

Lassie didn’t speak… neither of us spoke, for a long while she just held me. Finally, after my tears had stopped, and my eyes were probably bloodshot, Lassie spoke. “Jeeze man… that’s heavy… uhm, well… maybe one day you’ll get to go home and take her for that walk. She’ll probably forgive you if you tell her what happened,” Lassie assured me and I just stifled a laugh.

“She can’t talk like you,” I laughed sadly and Lassie just went puffy cheeked as she held back her laughter.

“Well duh!” She said as she slapped a paw to her forehead. “I’m like… the only talking dog around. And besides, not knowing a dog’s thoughts is the fun part of being an owner, right?” she asked and I just rolled my eyes.

“And it makes me feel saner too,” I replied and Lassie just rolled her eyes.

“Where you came from, I’m surprised that you managed to fit into a society of miniature talking horses and stay relatively sane,” Lassie laughed. I rolled my eyes but I did have to agree on her with that one.

Considering where I had come from, and how I was raised up… I was surprised about how much I had changed and managed to actually somewhat fit into the community. I sighed to myself and gave her a pat on the head then checked my watch.

It wasn’t necessarily late but… it was getting on in the day. The putting of a diesel locomotive caught my attention and I looked to see the F brother charging full steam ahead towards the library.

“What the hell are they doing?” I muttered to myself and Lassie leaned her weight into the railing as she placed one of her forelegs on the rail.

“Dunno… they probably want to talk to you,” she replied and I just rolled my eyes.

“I thought I made it clear I didn’t want to see them for a while,” I cursed to myself, rushing down the stairs and out the front door, Lassie in quick pursuit. I quickly ran to my truck and went for Heather, then remembered my little mishap with Tristan.

“Sorry sweetheart, another time,” I apologized, and then pulled out a case labelled ‘Violet’. Inside was a stylized combat shotgun, a big one. It was an identical clone to the famous Mossberg 590 combat series shotgun, but this particular model was made by a Brazilian company called Boito. It was nickel plated and had the long seven shot tube, or as some people call them, the eight shot.

It also featured a twenty inch barrel coupled with a heat shield, and the pump had a built in foregrip. The stock was adjustable with four lengths, and the shotgun featured a pistol grip. Overall it was a pleasant shotgun, nothing fantastic, and I had picked it up for a reasonable price… all those many months ago.

I thumbed a few buckshot shells into the tubular magazine, just to seem intimidating. As the brothers parked and descended, I racked the slide with the terrifying and iconic ‘KA-CHUKE!’ that the pump slide made while being actioned.

“Mr. Burdi-“ but I cut them off by firing a shot into the air, silencing them.

“I thought I said I didn’t want anything to do with you jokers for a long time,” I stated and they just gulped as I held my shotgun at hip level, racking the slide and ejecting the spent, smoking shell onto the ground.

“Please… just hear us out,” they began but I spoke over them.

“How many lives were ended? Do you have any clue how many died? How many were hurt? And for what?” I snarled and they just gulped.

“Yes… well, nopony actually knows the total causalities but… believe us when we say…” they trailed off, removed their hats, stood to their hindlegs, held their hats to their chests and gave me tear filled sappy eyed looks. “We’re terribly sorry. We realized that… somethings… should never be asked of a friend,” they stated and I rolled my eyes.

“That’s not my point. Ponies would’ve still died even if it wasn’t me you asked to do the favour,” I stated but they shrugged.

“But would you have cared? Tell us truly, would you have really actually sat down and thought about all those ponies dead if you had nothing to do with it and heard it on the radio?” they asked and I went to reply nobly but then realized that… they were right.

If the radio had’ve talked about it, mobsters and criminals dying in some goddess forsaken gang battle… I probably wouldn’t have paid much mind… in fact, I might not have even cared, so long as it didn’t happen to any of my frie-

My mind thought about it. They were right, even though I had reason in killing off those mobsters, I had done so selfishly, out of my own desires and need. “Shit…” I muttered to myself and they both raised an eyebrow.

“Now you understand. Mr. Burdick. If you would please come with us,” they began but I stopped them short.

“No way! No more bloodbath errands. No more-“ I began but they cut me short.

“Oh no. We promise. No errands whatsoever. We just… we humbly ask for your forgiveness but we also wanted to give you something more. However, it’s not quite finished but we thought before you get too far out of touch, we figured it might be good for you to know we are sorry and we’re going to try and patch things up between us,” they replied.

Lassie leaned over. “If all else fails, use materialism,” Lassie commented and I nodded. “I’m coming with you,” Lassie said aloud and the brothers paused in brief shock.

“She… talks?” they asked and I nodded, however, they didn’t seem as shocked as everypony else was when they found out. I found it a little strange and suspicious but quickly looked over it. They were inventors, stranger things could’ve happened to them then talking animals.

I grabbed some extra shells for my Violet then boarded their contraption. Lassie hopped on as well. “Why do I not trust these guys?” She asked and I shrugged.

“They’re business stallions. They send off those vibes,” I replied as we made for their desert garage.

* * *

Later, desert garage…

We hopped off the train and immediately Flim offered me a blindfold. “What’s the deal?” I asked hesitantly. They never struck me as the kidnapping type, but after their last fiasco, I wasn’t’ sure what to think of them.

“It’s a surprise. Put this on so you can’t see,” he offered. I was still somewhat hesitant.

I looked to Lassie and offered her the shotgun. “You know how to use this?” I asked and Flim held his hoof to his chest.

“Mr. Burdick. I’m insulted that you’d think you need such weaponry when we’re simply going to surprise you with gifts,” he said, struck with shock… but I think it was faked shock.

“Alright… fine,” I said, setting my shotgun aside but not letting my guard down as I slipped on the blindfold. They led me… somewhere, and I could tell a bunch of lights flicked on.

They removed the blindfold and I was almost blinded by the light. Lassie spoke before I did, having not been blinded by the light like I was. “Woah… what is it?” Lassie asked.

Finally my vision came around and I was thinking the same thing. It… well, it kinda looked a little like my truck, but a little like the GURKHA F5 combat vehicle from back on my world as well. It was hard to tell since there was still many pieces missing and the vehicle couldn't quite be considered drive-able.

“It’s a new vehicle we’ve been building. We’re going to patent it as the Burdickson…” they trailed off and looked to me. “Unless you want to call it something different?” they asked.

“Wait… you’re building a truck and naming it after me?” I asked but they shook their heads in unison.

“No… we’re hoping to produce an assembly of vehicles and name the brand after you,” they replied and I looked to them, not really knowing if this was a bad thing or a good thing.

“It'll be the greatest invention in Equestria since... probably sliced bread,” they began and Flam walked up, holding a remote.

“You see, we took the original design of you truck and modified it significantly. Namely, we shortened the vehicle’s overall lengths. That way you’ll be a little bit more nimble and can get around corner’s easier than in that boat you drive,” they commented.

“Hey now… Cadence gets around just fine,” I defended my truck but he rolled his eyes.

“Yes but for a combat vehicle-“ he began but I cut him short.

“Woah! Who said anything about combat vehicle! Slow down, I don’t want you guys producing a combat vehicle for ponies!” I argued but he simply sighed and Flim handed me a blueprint showing a more civilianized looking vehicle, far different from what mine looked like. In fact, the vehicle looked like an old 1930’s Ford Model AA.

“Wait… how’d you go from…” I looked to Cadence, then to the combat truck that was partially finished. “Cadence to that… then to-“ I cut myself short and looked to the blueprint. Maybe this was just one of those weird Equestrian things.

“Okay… so the civilian version isn’t meant to be a combat vehicle… so what makes you think I need a combat vehicle?” I asked and they both looked at each other than to me.

“Because ever since you arrived, you could’ve used one of these for just about every single battle you’ve been in,” the both said in unison. I was about to say I haven’t been in that many fights but… I had been in enough that they made their point.

“So… if it doesn’t have any weaponry-“ but they cut me short.

“Oh, but it does!” They both announced happily. I was about to object but Flim quickly countered my objection. “But they’re mostly all defensive, promise! No guns, just like we promised,” he said then nudged Flam who nearly jumped.

“Wha… oh right! Yes, ahem… observe!” He said joyfully then pressed a button. The truck didn’t quite disappear completely but… it turned almost invisible, kinda like the predator.

“You see Mr. Burdick, we’ve managed to integrate a near transparent light setting into the armor plating of the vehicle, making it almost invisible to the pony eye… erm… human eye,” he said then tapped another button and the vehicle came back into view.

“It features a relatively thick armored shell with anti-magic coating to prevent spell casters from damaging the vehicle or possibly overturning it. The armor itself can sustain up to and including mediocre spell blasts and can even sustain severe fire damage for short periods of time. The glass is impact resistant but… we haven’t got anything quite like your weapons to test it so we can’t say for sure if it’s bulletproof, but a magic blast shouldn’t bother you unless you’re getting attacked by a veteran unicorn or something along the likes,” Flam informed me, then Flim spoke up.

“Yes, and the vehicle is heavy enough that most creatures won’t be able to simply knock it over and the vehicle is completely encased so nothing can easily get into your vehicle. We also redesigned the motor to be smaller, more fuel efficient and with a more powerful torque rating than your old engine,” they stated. That information kind of hit me hard. I always liked my old truck but I suppose even the new trucks on my old world were smaller yet more powerful than poor old Cadence.

“We also switched the transmission to an optional manual transmission, so you can dictate the gear shift… just make sure to change the gear before about three thousand five hundred revolutions in any gear… it might wear down the transmission pretty fast if you max it out all the time,” Flim continued. “And right now, we’re integrating a powerful traction system on the wheels. As of now it isn’t quite finished but when it is… you may well be able to scale straight up the side of a mountain,” he stated, pressing a button on a control monitor. Spikes extended out of the wheels and gripped the vehicle to the floor.

Lassie leaned over to me. “I think it’s pretty snazzy,” she said and I rubbed my chin.

“I just have this feeling that you guys are trying to make me forget what you made me do by giving me something flashy… rather than actually face the reality of what happened,” I said and both Flim and Flam sighed while looking down to the ground and kicking a stone.

“Well… you see… it’s just that…” they both trailed off. “We don’t really… know how to apologize for this. We can’t tell what you’re feeling and truthfully… we are sorry but I don’t think either of us could really fix what has been done,” Flim said.

I bit my lip. He had a point. Nothing they do could really change, or fix, what had been done. Flam spoke. “So we figured if we gave you something we truly poured our hearts into… maybe you’d forgive us and we could put the past… in the past,” he said.

“My best friend is still in the hospital,” I said but Lassie quickly piped up.

“No I’m not,” she stated.

“Different best friend,” I told her. “If one simply forgets the past, they’re prone to making the same mistake again,” I told them and Flam spoke first.

“But those who dwell on the past are sure to miss the future,” he said and I bit my lip. But before I could try and interject, Flim interrupted us.

“Regardless of future or past. We’re not trying to force you to forgive us. We’re just trying to show you that we’re actually sorry,” Flim stated. “It’s not done yet, but when it is, it’ll be one of our greatest creations, one of the most technological advanced things in all Equestria… all for your taking,” he told me.

Strange really, even now, I wasn’t sure if they were actually sorry or just bluffing really well. For now I’d accept their apology. “Okay guys…” I took a deep breath. “I forgive you,” I said and their faces went into bright smiles. “But!” I said, making them both go pale faced again. “If something like this ever happens again… I’m gonna get mad,” I said and Flim spoke up.

“Like last time?” he asked and I shook my head.

“I wasn’t made then,” I stated, thinking back to when I just got back from Manehatten with Derpy.

“Really? But you were yelling… and screaming… loudly,” he said, almost like yelling and screaming was the absolute worst I could do.

“That wasn’t angry. I was unhappy,” I boasted and they both gulped.

“Indeed… oh, one more thing before you go,” Flam interjected and I raised an eyebrow as he offered me a plain looking watch.

“I already have one,” I stated but he shook his head.

“It’s nothing like that thing, I swear,” he said. I removed my watch and set the new one on. “The straps are made of a tough fiber so they shouldn’t break under normal circumstances,” he said.

It kinda felt a little like leather… maybe Kevlar. The watch was completely digital, with numbers indicating the month, the day, and which day of the week it was, along with the time, though it was on the twenty four hour cycle, not twelve hour like I was accustomed to.

There was also a bunch of buttons. I went to press one but Flim stopped me. “WAIT!” He announced and I stopped immediately. “That button releases an EMP charge that’ll fry anything electric within a ten yard radius,” he informed me.

“So wouldn’t that kill that watch?” I asked but he shook his head.

“No. The watch is made of a special EMP resistant paneling that counters the micro emissions transmitted by the blast,” he said scientifically. “That watch has many functions, this button here," he said, pointing to another button. “Launches a grappling cable that can shoot about thirty to forty yards depending on the conditions, and has a length of about on hundred meters so you can grapple down all sorts of things,” he said and I looked at the watch.

“How did you fit all that wire in here?” I asked but he simply shrugged.

“Don’t think too much about it, you’ll only get a headache, trust me. This button,” he said, pointing to yet another. “Fires a rather potent tranquilizer that can even knockout an Ursa Major,” he informed me. “But you have to be within five yards for the dart to have enough force, or it might not even penetrate pony skin… and you also only have one shot, but it’s easy to reload,” he quickly opened a small port at the front of the watch which I thought was another button.

Just load a dart down there, and pull back on this,” he said, pulling back on a button that must’ve actually been a cocking handle. “Then… when you’re ready, simply cock your wrist downwards and…” Flim trailed off, waiting for me to do as he instructed. I tilted my hand down and the watch let out a silent ‘tshoop’ almost like a weak crossbow of some sort.

Flim closed the front launch port shut and handed me a small packet. “There’s only five shots, but if you want more we can make them. You can also leave one loaded with the port shut,” he informed me.

“Anything else?” I asked and he nodded, albeit nervously.

“Well… it does… kind of… have a laser… but it’s very short ranged and intended for cutting through metal… though we weren’t quite sure if you’d think we were trying to create a weapon or not so… it’s a little less than developed and only has a range of about a hoof so…” he trailed off.

“Tell him about the remote control function,” Flam piped up as he fiddled with something while Lassie watched. Funny, while I was listening to Flim’s informational speech about my watch, I hadn’t even noticed what those two were doing. I still didn’t know what they were up to.

Flim turned to me and held out a remote. “We’ve been trying to integrate a remote control function but…” he clicked a button and the timepiece of the watch crawled out of the housing. It looked almost like a spider but with four legs instead of eight.

It jumped down and Flim showed me the remote which had a visual screen, showing what the watch spider was looking at. There was a bunch of little readouts on the screen, most of which was directions, temperature… mostly useless stuff.

“However…” Flim stated depressingly as he began to control the spider, making it move around. “We haven’t quite...” he trailed off as the spider’s legs didn’t work in harmonic unison, and the spider collapsed, its legs still trying to crawl while it sprawled around on the ground.

Lassie let out a whooping cheer. “AWW YEAH! Look at this thing!” She announced and Flam merely chuckled. I looked over and Lassie was displaying a fancy dog collar. The wraparound of the collar was a regular blue adjustable belt, and the tag itself was a stylized golden colour. It had a beautiful inscription that read, in cursive letters, ‘Lassie’.

“I like these guys!” Lassie announced. I just smirked. Well, at least materialism worked on one of us. Lassie shook Flam’s paw while Flim looked back to me and set the timepiece… spider thing… gadget, back into the watch.

“For now,” Flim began, “Just don’t use that function. But other than that, we’ve worked most of the bugs out of it,” he stated. Ha-ha… bugs.

“Alright… uhm, thanks,” I thanked them. Okay… maybe the materialism worked a bit on me too. I inhaled and patted Flim on the shoulder. "I'm sorry you guys... for being so rough on you earlier... I just... it's just that..." I trailed off and Flim put a hoof on my shoulder.

"Some words need not be spoken to understand them," he said and I nodded.

Flim and Flam both went back to work, leaving Lassie and I to mingle about in the shop. “Woah,” Lassie said aloud and I walked over to her. In front of her, and what I presumed her to be looking at, was what looked like the frame of a two wheeled vehicle, possibly a motorcycle, but the wheels were beside one another, not one in front and one to the rear.

“Looks like they were trying to build a motorcycle or something,” I mentioned and Lassie shook her head and pointed to a wall.

“I think they were trying to build much more than that,” she said and I looked up to the wall. All the photos looked so old. They had an orange-ish tint to them, making them look like newspapers from the 30’s. But if these photos were so old… then they couldn’t be of Flim and Flam.

I set my finger on one of the photos and peered closer at it. Maybe the newspaper was made to look like this and it wasn’t actually that old. Most of the articles went on about two young inventors that were making a name for themselves.

A lot of the inventions were pretty cool, even though I had heard of most of them from my old world. New combustion engines to replace magically driven ones, carriages moved by motor rather than labour…

Lassie spoke both our minds. “Wow… these guys really were something,” she said and I nodded. “What went wrong?” she asked and I looked back to them, then to the photos.

They seemed like such a promising pair of inventors, that didn’t strike me as the conniving type that AJ told me they were. Nowhere on the wall of photos did it speak of some downfall, or scheming of their company… nothing. It just… stopped.

“Maybe they just… got greedy or something,” I suggested and Lassie shrugged.

“Maybe we should ask them,” she offered but I grabbed her.

“No! Let’s… let’s not. Maybe it’s a painful thing to talk about,” I said, talking one last gleaming look at the wall of photos. Funny, even though they were photos, it was like I was looking into the past.

In my mind, the photos produced a movie like projection into the air for me to see. The humming chug of an old movie projector played in my mind. The orange tinted ponies in the photos began to move in my mind, and the two brothers smiled, laughing as they shook one another’s hoof and presented to the public their newest invention. They were so young in those photos. Heck, Flam didn't even have his facial hair at the time.

I smiled faintly, holding my left hand over my mouth and stroking my cheek with my thumb, almost as if I was thinking about something. I sighed and turned to Lassie. “Well… maybe it’s time to go home,” I said with a sigh.

“How? Your truck’s at home,” she replied and I looked to the two brothers who were working away at some contraption…

* * *

Ponyville…

The train vehicle departed, Lassie and I waving to the brothers as they left. It was late now, the evening sun setting in the distance. I slung my combat shotgun over my shoulder and decided it was time to face the music… so to speak.

“Guess it’s now or never,” I said and Lassie looked up to me.

“What’s now or never?” she asked, somewhat unsure of what I had meant.

“I have to… talk with mom about… last night,” I said and we made for the door of the house. I still wasn’t sure how she'd take this. As we entered the home, I was shocked to find it just as we had left it… empty.

“Mom… Spike?!” I yelled out but nopony answered.

“Hey Twilight! Spike!...” Lassie trailed off. “Owl! Come hither!” She yelled and Owlowiscious flew down to its perch on Lassie’s back. “Minion, where have they gone?” Lassie asked and I just face palmed over how Lassie addressed Twilight’s pet.

“Who,” the owl replied.

“Twilight and Spike. Where have they gone?” Lassie asked.

“Who,” it replied again.

“Princess Twilight and Spike the baby dragon… where have they gone?” Lassie asked.

“Who,” the owl still replied. Lassie threw her front right paw up into the air in distress.

“Aww to hell with you. You’re useless… now go get me some nachos!” Lassie ordered, tying a bag of bits to its leg. The owl flew off and Lassie smiled.

“Uhm Lassie… how does he understand you?” I asked and Lassie shrugged.

“It’s not that we understand one another. It’s that it realizes that I am dominant, so it does my biding,” Lassie commented, not truly answering my question.

“Uhm… right,” I replied and Lassie looked to me.

“Say… you wanted me to cover you when they had you blindfolded, right?” She asked and I nodded. “Well…I don’t actually know how to use one of those, you’re going to have to teach me,” Lassie commented but I shook my head.

“Tomorrow,” I replied and she gave me a pouty look. “Sorry pup, but if mom and Spike ain’t home, then I gotta make dinner. And you didn’t send Owlowiscious out with enough money for all of us,” I replied.

Lassie swung her right front paw across her chest as she snapped. “Shit,” she cursed… wait, how did she snap without a thumb?

I set my shotgun behind the front door, then proceeded into the kitchen. “What should we have for dinner?” I asked. Lassie pulled out some cereal and milk.

“Feel like a bit of nostalgia?” she asked, bringing up the topic about how I used to feed my dog Ally cereal and milk for breakfast. I just chuckled and took a seat across from her. Lassie set out two bowls with spoons and filled the bowls with with cereal. I poured the milk and we sat their eating cereal, just like I used to back in the day with my dog.

I took a deep inhale through my nose and looked over to Lassie, who didn’t bother using her spoon and simply slurped it, just like Ally used to. Lassie noticed my stare and looked over with a raised brow.

“Wha?” she asked through a mouthful of cereal, some of the chewed bits falling out onto the table.

“Nothing… just thinking about old times,” I replied. She just rolled her eyes and continued eating. Every time she’d run low on cereal or milk, she’d replace it with more, until we were out of cereal.

“Damn,” she muttered then quickly licked up the milk in her bowl. As she finished, Twilight’s pet owl entered the room with a white takeout carton on its back. It landed on the table and presented it to Lassie.

My canine friend gracious took the carton, giving the owl a little rub to the noggin. She then pulled out a little bag of crickets. “Here, let me indulge you,” Lassie replied, handing over the bag.

Owlowiscious took the bag then flew off, leaving Lassie with the carton. She popped it open the started shoveling cheesy chips into her mouth. Stopping for a moment, she held out a cluster of chips, dripping in melted cheese, for me to take.

“Wan’ some?” she asked through a mouthful. I waved my hand in decline. I sat there and snickered to myself as Lassie hovelled back the rest of the nachos then belched loudly. “Now that!” She announced for all to hear. “Is a dinner of champions,” she said proudly while rubbing her full belly.

“Maybe add some steak and bacon… ribs and porkchops… a little bit of soda, potato salad… macaroni and chees... yeah, dinner of champions,” I said and she rose a brow.

“Steak and bacon? Like from animals?” She asked and my stomach dropped. I figured that because she was a dog, she’d be less freaked out by the idea of eating an animal.

“Sorry… I uhh… thought you’d-“ but she cut me off.

“You know… that would sound pretty good if I wasn’t stuffed,” she said then stood up to her hindlegs. “Well, come on, let’s go watch some TV,” Lassie offered and I was willing to follow. TV sounded pretty good right about now.

Lassie flopped down on the couch while I leaned back in the recliner. “Life of luxury,” I commented and Lassie nodded.

“I suppose that’s what it’s like when your mom’s a princess,” she added and I nodded while Lassie flicked on the tube. She surfed the channels until she found and old black and white movie with giant spiders terrorizing a city.

I just chuckled as she decided this was the movie we were watching. Her and her corny movies…

As the movie continued, I found it harder and harder to keep my eyes open. Every so often I’d pass out long enough that when I awoke, the movie would be further along from where I passed out.

Eventually, I gave into the vice of exhaustion and dozed off for the night…

* * *

Tuesday, May 12th, 2014…

I awoke to the annoying sound of a prolonging beep. My vision was all hazy, especially with the lack of light. I tilted my head up and looked through the front window. The sun hadn’t even begun to rise yet so it was still…

I looked to the new watch. It read 0439. So almost quarter to five. The beep continued to ring and I looked over to the bright television. The test pattern was playing, and color bars littered the screen.

“Ugh… muh… uhh!” I groaned, trying to wake Lassie without having to put in any physical effort. She, however, was out cold. It wouldn’t be a problem, so long as I had the TV remote. This however was not the case, as the TV remote lay in her lap.

“UHHH!” I groaned loudly and Lassie stirred in her sleep. “GAARRRR!” I groaned deeply and Lassie got choked up on a snore and awoke drowsily.

“Wha… huh?” she asked then clucked her tongue around inside her mouth. “Ugh… morning breath,” she cursed to herself.

“Lassie… uhh!” I groaned and Lassie looked over to me with exhausted, dreary eyes.

“What?” she asked sleepily.

“Turn off… the TV,” I told her and she swayed her head around, trying to process what she had just heard. “The remote… use it… to turn off the TV,” I said and she looked over to the ringing TV, that was still playing the test pattern.

Lassie rose her paw to a level height, the remote in her hand, then pressed the power button, effectively ending the annoying ring. With that, she simply released the TV remote and let it fall to the floor with a ‘CLACK!’

“Ugh! I think I ate too much last night,” Lassie said then burped loudly. With rub of her belly, she shook her head. “Nope, just gas,” she announced. I rolled my eyes as I squirmed around in the chair, trying to get comfortable again.

I let out a huff and arose from my slumber, stretching out with a yawn. I suppose, seeing as how we ate all the cereal last night, we should maybe, probably, conceivably go get more from the grocery mart.

Lassie staggered out of bed and began to mosey around pointlessly, with no real destination in mind as she walked circled around the living room. “We need to get some breakfast food,” I said and Lassie nodded.

“Agreed. But we can just have… SHIT!” She swore loudly. She hopped up to her hindlegs, grabbed the collar of my shirt and began to shake me. “WE’RE OUT OF CEREAL!” She screamed, like it was horrifying.

I blinked tiredly. “We can just go get more from the grocery store,” I stated and she blinked.

“Oh yeah…” she trailed off, having somehow gapped the fact that we get cereal from the grocery store. I yawned as I rubbed the eye boogers from my face.

“Come on, we’ll-“ but I was cut off by a knock at the door. The hairs on the back of my neck prickled up. Whatever that was… it felt terrible.

“Lassie,” I whispered, sneaking up beside the door. Lassie followed and I pointed to the shotgun. She grabbed it and tossed it to me. I sniffed the air. Whatever it was… it smelled nothing like anything I had ever smelled before.

‘You open the door,’ I lipped and she nodded. “On three,” I whispered and she grabbed the doorknob while I readied to breach out the door, shotgun loaded and at the ready. “One,” I said and the anticipation began to make me sweat. “Two,” my heart began to race.

“THREE!”

Author's Note

Well, there we go, another chapter. Hopefully I can get another one out again soon. Besides the point, thanks to all you gals and guys still putting up with this horrendous story. (Okay, maybe it's not horrendous but I like to put myself down)

Chapter 31

Contains explicit material

‘Wait… who?...’

I didn’t use the pistol grip, and held the shotgun in an improvised fashion, almost as if the shotgun were a regular rifle grip, that way I could thrust the gun muzzle straight under the chin of the culprit and still manage to squeeze the trigger comfortably.

I realized rather quickly that it was no pony that I was facing, and the creature was actually close to my own height. I thrusted the barrel upwards and slammed it beneath its chin.

“Oh please… don’t kill me,” begged a voice of timid masculinity. I was greeted by the sight of a… dragon… goat… thing. “Please… I am but a mere beggar to you, don’t kill me,” begged the creature, of origin I didn’t quite know.

It looked like a dragon, a goat, some kinda bird and a lion all had a greasy orgy and this was the result… literally, the thing was scraggily and had miss mashed body parts of several different animals. It even had a bat wing for Christ sakes.

I lowered the shotgun from underneath his chin and he… it, rubbed its chin soothingly. “Yes… well, ahem,” he took a deep breath then entered the home.

“Hey! What the hell do you think you’re doing?!” I asked, having not invited the creature inside.

“I’m looking for a caretaker,” it replied. I think it was a he… but I couldn’t be sure. He walked around “TWILIGHT! TWILIGHT WHERE THE BLOODY HAY ARE YOU?!” The… thing asked.

“Hey buddy? Who the fuck are you?” I asked roughly and he turned around, wild-eyed.

“My goddess… you… just swore,” he stated, almost thrilled and I rolled my eyes.

“Fuck, hell, shitty, ass, tits, balls, pussy, faggot,” I added in and he rubbed his chin, looking around still wide-eyed.

“Yes… indeed. I see,” he mentioned in a stunned tone, then turned back to me. “Where is Ms. Twilight Sparkle anyway?” he asked and I coughed while leveling my shotgun at my hip, guiding the barrel in his direction.

“First names buddy,” I ordered and he rose his right… lion paw, to his chest and gasped.

“I’m astounded you haven’t heard of me. My name…” he trailed off, crouching down. I readied my trigger finger. He leapt up, confetti spraying everywhere. “DISCORD, LORD OF… Ahem, reformed lord of chaos!” He announced boldly.

‘Discord… Discord…’ I thought to myself then remembered the story. “Hey wait… aren’t you supposed to be imprisoned in stone or something?” I asked and he sighed.

“No, I am not supposed to be imprisoned in stone or something. I was… but then I was gracefully released, and reformed by my dearest friend, Fluttershy,” he informed me, but I was still a bit edgy.

“Okay… so what gives? Why are you here?” I asked and he rolled his eyes.

“Well… if you must know, and I mean absolutely MUST know… Fluttershy left the other day and didn’t come home to make me dinner… nor breakfast. I went to have my needs satisfied by Rarity… ahem, Mistress Rarity, but she wasn’t home either. That blasted Rainbow Dash was also out of town and wouldn’t even come to my aid if I was dying. Applejack may have made a splendid Apple breakfast for me, but her selfish ways dictated that her own personal needs were before mine… and she was absent from the residence. Pinkie Pie was also nowhere to be found, probably out partying when she should be home to take care of poor old me. So I resorted to my old friend Twilight… TWILIGHT! I’M HUNGRY!” Discord yelled.

“Well… she actually isn’t here either,” I stated and Discord began to whine as he flopped down and began to thrash about on the floor like a child having a temper tantrum.

“Why is it that nopony loves me enough to feed me? Why don’t you just throw me in a dumpster now and be done with it?!” He cried and I went wide-eyed as I looked to Lassie.

‘Seriously, this guy is the lord of chaos and he can’t even feed himself?’ I thought to myself. “Uhm… well, we were about to go get some groceries… if you want, you can tag along and we’ll all have breakfast together?” I offered.

He went puppy dog eyed as he grovelled up to me, on his knees and holding the base of my shirt, weeping profusely. “Oh please… please spare a poor beggar but a single meal. I’m sooo hungry,” he begged in a very humble way.

“Uhm… yeah, okay,” I said and Lassie tugged on my pant leg.

“Is it just me or does this guy not strike you as the villain type he was portrayed as in the stories?” she asked and I nodded.

I helped Discord, reformed lord of chaos, to his feet. “Yeah, sure, we’ll take you in for now. Come on,” I offered. He immediately got his bearings in check. “Give me one second, I have to get some clean clothes,” I said and moved downstairs.

I tossed off my old clothes, everything, setting my watch and necklace on the nightstand. Looking through my dresser, I realized that without Twilight around, a lot of laundry needed to be done. I looked around tossed on some semi-fresh clothes. A pair of underwear, my M81 camouflage pants, a dark green V-neck shirt, some grey socks and my battle jacket, with the sleeves rolled up. I slipped my religious cross necklace back on and the new watch Flim and Flam had made me.

Rushing back upstairs, I got this weird feeling about Discord. As we left, I slung my shotgun across my back, and stopped at Cadence. I grabbed my custom leg holster and Belladonna, along with the chest harness full of fresh magazines. Setting the shotgun aside, I slipped my chest harness over my jacket, then slung Violet to my back again. Even though he didn’t seem ruthless, cruel and sadistic, he gave off bad vibes.

“Oooh… what are those things anyway?” Discord asked, intrigued by the shininess. He looked into his distorted reflection on Belladonna as I stuffed her into the holster.

“You don’t wanna find out,” I replied and Discord frowned.

“I told you about me… why are you being so secretive?” he interrogated.

“Fine. These things are built to kill ponies, but they can kill other things just as easily,” I stated, in a mildly threatening voice. He gulped.

“My golly… such aggression. And for what?” he asked to nopony in particular.

“For bad guys,” I stated deeply and he brushed his brow.

“Whew! Glad I was reformed before you arrived. That could’ve ended badly for me,” he stated then wrapped his withered… well, I wasn’t sure if it was withered or if it was meant to be that messed up, left arm around my shoulders. “I’m glad we’re friends, Mr.… uhm, I’m sorry, I don’t believe I got your name,” he offered.

“Burdick, Evan Burdick, but yah can call me Burdy if yah fancy,” I replied and he nodded.

“Well, I’m so glad that we’re friends, Burdy,” he said as we strolled through Ponyville. Ponies looked at our trio as we casually walked along. Even now, I still didn’t quite trust this guy, but as he rambled on about his former days as the lord of chaos… he still didn’t strike me as a truly bad guy… more like a spoiled little brat.

“So… how about you?” he asked, breaking my train of thought.

“Huh… what about me?” I asked.

“Before this… all this, as Twilight’s faithful student… what did you do for a living?” he asked and I just tossed the question around. I wanted him to make sure I wasn’t one to screw with… but I also didn’t want to come across as an asshole.

“I uhh… well, I milked cows,” I replied and he furrowed his brow. “What?” I asked, noticing his stare.

“You… just milked cows… nothing else? Why have those dangerous… things then?” he asked.

“Because I didn’t just milk cows,” I informed him and he motioned for me to continue. I let out a sigh. “I... just had lots of them... because I liked to have lots of them,” I replied.

“Have you… killed ponies?” he asked, not excitedly, but not fearfully either.

“I… have killed ponies. Back on my world though, I tried to reside enough away from society. I just kinda liked to keep to myself. People also knew I wasn’t afraid to get my hands bloody,” I replied and he raised his eyebrow.

“Did you ever kill any of your own kind?” he asked, intrigued by the topic.

“No… people knew enough not to mess around with me. Even those burglars that robbed just about every car on my country road, knew enough to stay away from my house. Wouldn’t even step foot on my property line… guess they didn’t want to play,” I added in the last part with a sinister tone.

Discord gulped. “Well… I see. I suppose if I knew you better, I wouldn’t want to rob you either,” he stated and I raised a brow.

“You saying you’re gonna try and rob me?” I asked defensively and he immediately reworded himself.

“Nonononono! That wasn’t at all what I meant. I meant that you seem like the kind of pony that others respect greatly out of fear,” he stated and I smirked.

“I’m just joshing yah, chill,” I joked with him, giving him a playful nudge. He stammered nervously, obviously intimidated by me. “At least I still got my old rustic charm, eh Lassie?” I said, patting her on the head affectionately.

“And your density,” she replied back and I gave he a confused look. She just shook it off. “Don’t worry about it… you’d probably have an aneurism thinking about it,” she stated and again I was confused.

Lassie rolled her eyes as she continued down the street. I stopped for a second to think about it. “What… I don’t get it?” I thought to myself. Lassie stopped a few yards away and looked back to me.

With a cough, she caught my attention. I looked up and she fluffed her tail at me. “Cumming?” she asked and I shook off the pondering thoughts I had and quickly caught up with them.

“So Discord… how are you… the bad guy?” I asked and he rubbed his chin as he began his rather long story. At first, I will admit, it was fascinating. He had a wonderful motivation about how he was always kept in line and couldn’t have fun so he had a burning desire, a passion… a lust, for chaos. But then it got stupid.

He started going on about making chocolate rain showers, and candy trees… and… this stuff sounded stupider and more childish than a Disney villain… hell, even Disney villains were worse and more sinister than this guy. All he did was some mischief.

I didn’t interrupt him however, and let him ramble on as we entered the grocery mart. He was cut short with a squeaking gasp as he pointed over to the sweets. “OOOOHHH! Can we have some, pretty please?!” he begged.

Oh god… I could already tell this would be harder than taking care of a five year old. I raised my index finger in a parenting way. “If you’re good… we’ll get some candy on the way out,” I stated and he grinned.

“Promise?” he asked and I nodded. “Pinkie Promise?” he asked.

“Pinkie Promise?” I asked.

He began to do a bunch of motions. “Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye,” and as he said the last part, he jammed a cupcake in my eye.

“AHH! WHAT THE FUCK?!” I yelled, wiping the pastry away from my eye, which stung mildly from the icing.

Discord gave a sheepish look. “Sorry… that’s the Pinkie Promise,” he stated nervously.

“Where the hell’d you get a cupcake?” I asked and he pointed to a tray of cupcakes for sale. I just groaned and began to push the cart along. “Come on, let’s just go,” I grumbled.

I noted to grab apples, oranges, bananas, grapes, lettuce… the good stuff. It was weird now that I thought about it. Most supermarkets back home had cold sections for the meat. But here, there were none.

We kept going along, grabbing some bread and other stuff. Huh… funny, for the first time in a long time, I was shopping appropriately. Eventually we got to the good section, with the pastries and treats. We loaded up on what we could get, but nothing too much.

I was rather surprised really, Discord didn’t want much other than chocolate treats: chocolate cupcakes, chocolate cookies, chocolate doughnuts…

We stacked up and were on our way out when I spotted the milk fridges. I went over, noting we needed some milk. I went to grab some cartons but Discord grabbed some classic milk bottles.

I grabbed one and took a look. “Product of… Trottingham,” I said, looking to a picture that had a mare with… yellowish beige coloured fur, curly blue hair, green eyes, freckles and a white milkman… erm, milkmare hat.

“Yes. I quite like this milk. Try some, it’s divine,” Discord offered.

“I’ll have some later,” I replied, putting some into the cart. It was a tad bit more expensive than the cartons, by a few bits actually, but if it’s better, I’d go for it.

Discord grabbed one, popped the lid and offered me it. “You might not like it. It’s rich and creamy. Better try some before you buy it,” he offered. I sighed, slightly agitated but I suppose if I didn’t like it and had only gotten that brand…

I took the bottle and took a sip. It was sort of sweet, and a bit creamy like Discord mentioned. I licked my lips and nodded. “Yeah… it’s pretty good.”

Discord nodded in return as I took another sip. “Mare milk is the best,” he stated and I spewed the milk out. “WHAT?!” I gasped and he nodded, a curiously raised eyebrow as he stopped and looked at me.

“What?” he asked back.

“What… did you just say?” I asked, hesitant whether I heard him right or not.

“Mare milk… it’s the best. That’s why I like it, and why I encouraged you to buy it,” he stated then tilted back his bottle and drank some more.

“M-m-ma-mare milk?” I managed groggily.

“Why yes. Wouldn’t you agree?” he asked.

“Jesus… what’s wrong with ponies? Drinking other pony’s milk?” I asked. Christ, that’d be like back home if I went to the grocery mart and there was milk from people being sold… ech!

“Well… where do you prefer your milk? Soy?” he asked and I gagged at the thought of soy milk. I had it once, it was gross.

“No… I like cow milk,” I stated and he just rolled his eyes.

“So what’s wrong with pony milk?” he asked and I went to reply but Lassie stopped me by tugging on my pant leg and pointing back to the cow milk section. A female cow was putting two cartons of cow milk into her cart.

“I-uh-ah-ach… I…” I just trailed off.

“Yes, so without further ado, let us make haste, for I am starving,” Discord stated.

I just grabbed a few cartons of chocolate milk. At least that stuff was so doused with chemicals and stuff that it couldn't really be considered milk. I was totally mind fucked.

We reached the checkout and Lassie spoke up. “Totally over three hundred bits. Probably like three hundred and forty,” she said competitively, almost like it was a sport to guess how close the total would be.

“Four hundred and twenty-seven,” Discord stated.

I looked at the groceries we had. Gauging the price of everything… “Two hundred and… fifty two,” I stated and they both looked at me, shocked by my guess.

Lassie chuckled. “Yeah, you wish,” she stated and I nodded.

“Losers buys?” I offered and we all put our respective paw, claw, and hand in on the bet. We waited for the cashier to ring everything through and the price came out to two-sixty-three,” I looked to them with a cocky smirk.

“Now what?” I joked and Lassie was quick to grab my money. “Hey, that’s mine!” I gasped and she nodded.

“You said loser pays. You didn’t say with whose money,” she laughed. “Besides, we have none, so we’re just mooching off you,” she giggled and paid for the bill. I just groaned. It figures.

We proceeded out of the grocery mart, keeping the cart with us. We’d just return it later. As we walked along, Lassie began to whistle. After a short while, Discord began whistling too. And after that, I started whistling as well.

As we arrived back, we all helped unload the groceries, though Lassie puckered off and started making breakfast before we were done unloading everything. At first we unloading things properly, though after a short while, Discord started misarranging things, putting stuff like peanut butter in the breadbox, or eggs in the pantry… I think they’d go rotten there.

As we finished, Lassie motioned us into the kitchen. “Hey, I even got whip cream and berries for the waffles!” she announced. Discord and I walked into the kitchen, though Discord did so in an unmannerly fashion, which irritated me slightly.

Flopping down like he owned the place, he pulled a large quantity of food towards himself. I was going to say something about being respectful in somepony else’s house, then realized he hadn’t eaten since… well, at least a while, because he made a note about how Fluttershy had been out last night and hadn’t fed him… so where the hell was Angel Bunny? Anyway, I made no comment about his rude manners seeing as how he hadn’t eaten in over twelve hours, maybe longer.

Lassie pulled me towards the table. “Come on, sit-sit,” she said, a little in a rush as she and Discord began to hog all the food. Man, they must’ve really been hungry.

Discord would hovel down mouthfuls of waffles at a time, then use the spray cream to fill his mouth until it was overflowing and finally swallow. The end result was a terribly messy kitchen, but still I paid them no mind.

I pulled up a plate and cut myself some orange slices. “Oh, dearest friend Burdy. How I do so love oranges. Would you mind if I took a slice or two?” he asked, rather politely as well.

“Uhm… sur-“ but before I could finish, he pulled the plate over to himself and scoffed back the entire flak of orange slices I had cut. “You’re… welcome,” I stated, unsure if he actually appreciated it, or was just being rude.

I began cutting myself more oranges, which this time I actually got to eat, while Discord and Lassie made a mess. As they filled themselves to their heart’s content, Discord spoke up.

“Oh, I do say. There are some good ol’ fashion horror movies on the tube, if you are interested?” He asked and Lassie shot straight up.

“Oh yeah. Hopefully there’s the one about the spiders again,” she said excitedly.

“They actually made a sequel to that as well. It’s supposed to be on later tonight,” Discord replied and Lassie squealed in delight.

“HORROR MOVIE MARATHON!” They both cheered as they rushed into the living room, stockpiled with junk food. I looked back to the kitchen, which was an absolute mess. Syrup was dripping off the table, spray cream was EVERYWHERE… somehow even in the fridge which was open for some reason. Milk leaked out of the cartons which were overturned.

The dirty plates lay dormant on the table with the utensils. “Hey guys, what about the mess in the kitchen?” I asked, hoping to recruit them to help me clean this mess.

“Yeah-yeah… we’ll do it later,” Discord waved his withered claw hand carelessly. I just rolled my eyes. I wasn’t cleaning it on my own, that was for sure. I walked along towards my room, and as I did, I gave my biceps a bit of a squeeze.

It had been some time since I thoroughly worked out, and I was feeling a little sluggish. I mingled down to my room and unslung the shotgun from my back. I also unbuckled the holster from my leg, setting it aside. With a sigh, I tossed off my jacket and shirt, and then did some long, relaxing stretches.

With my body stretched out, I went to start, but my basement window suddenly flung open and another presence entered the room. I just smirked and chuckled lightly as I realized who it was. “Couldn’t have used the door?” I asked and he shook his head.

“There’s two types of people in the world. Those who use the door, and those who use the window,” he stated as he tossed off his black uniform. It was the uniform he wore during the Manehatten incident. The Punisher outfit.

“Finally deciding to keep up on your physique, eh?” Derreck teased as he hefted up a seventy pound dumbbell and began curling, making it look like there was no weight at all to the free-weight.

“Show-off,” I muttered then grabbed another set of weights, a lighter pair, as a warm up. Derreck just stood there, a coy smile on his face as I did my warm up, and he just stood there, curling the weight as if it were nothing, never stopping.

As I finished up my warm up, I stretched out and looked to Derreck. “Can I borrow those?” I asked, wanting to slowly bring myself into the heavy set of weights.

“I thought we finished the warm up already?” He teased.

“Jus gimme does,” I muttered in my best Arnie accent. He just laughed. As I began curling the heavier weights, he simply would grab even heavy weights.

I stopped increasing my weights at about 160lbs, but he was cranking it up to 200lbs, but at least he was showing effort in his workout now. Finding the edge of my comfort zone in these weights I began my workout, and then slowly started rotating around my room, exercising different parts of my body as I went along.

Yet, every workout I did, Derreck would simply outpace me, out lift me, out… everything me. He was good… no, he was exceptional. As we puttered along, we began conversing, remembering, and laughing about old times. Oh how I miss them so sometimes. I would never want to go back to living like that... ha, just listen to me, in the beginning it was all I wanted, to go back. Now I don't want to go back.

After a few hours of semi-intensive exercise, we slowed down to a stop. I was huffing a bit, but Derreck simply walked over to the mirror and flexed. He didn’t quite have tone to his muscles, but simply mere mass.

“You know, with the way I am now… I bet if I toned myself to perfection, around here I could be Mr. Olympia,” he stated and I just rolled my eyes. I did have to admit, we had both grown so much in our time in Equestria… though now I’m wondering what he had been doing those six or seven months that I didn’t know he was here.

I just smiled. “You know, in Equestria, it seems like females are the dominant sex… so it’s probably Mrs. Olympia,” I mentioned. He cupped his man breasts, pectoral majors I think they were called, and cupped them in his hands as he puffed them up.

“I could be Mrs. Olympia,” he laughed as he played with his man bewbs. I just laughed. From upstairs, we could hear Lassie and Discord howling in both laughter and screams. “They’re having fun,” he muttered and I nodded. Derreck mingled over to the squat press and flumped down, putting on a mere 730lbs. I knew at this point he was just screwing around since I had seen him pump over twelve-hundred earlier.

I finished with some relaxing stretches that I coupled with soothing music on the radio, the one that Spike had given me for Christmas, err… Hearth’s Warming. Derreck chuckled as he casually finished his workout. “Didn’t know you did Yoga,” he laughed.

I just rolled my eyes as I outstretched my arms. “I don’t,” I replied. He matched my moves in perfect unison. The ambient sounds of nature’s most wild and vivid beauties played on the radio as we struck many Yoga poses, though most took us a little time to do some of the poses correctly.

After… what must’ve been an hour at least, I stopped and relaxed. Looking out the small basement window, I saw it was sunset. Derreck flopped down onto an exercise bench and laid down, somewhat exhausted, and sweating profusely.

I took off my jacked and shirt, along with my boots and socks, and finally rested my body on my bed. As soon as my body touched the soft silky sheets, I passed out.

* * *

Hours later…

I awoke to the sound of my door slamming, Twilight storming down the stairs. “Discord’s here, and he’s made a mess!” She said in a very irritated voice.

“Uhm… yeah, he is,” I said, still a little dreary, having just woken up.

“He said that you invited him to stay,” she interrogated, stepping up to the side of my bed and poking me in the chest with her hoof. I scratched the back of my head, yawning.

“Uhm… well… yeah I figured… he didn’t have anywhere else to stay and that he was hungry… so…” I trailed off. She rolled her eyes with a flustered huff.

“Ugh! You’re so caring… it’s so sexy,” she said and before I could say anything, she pressed her lips to mine, rubbing her body into me as she crawled atop of my body, pinning me to the bed. My eyes wide, I immediately looked over to Derreck, but saw he was no longer present.

As she pulled her mouth from mine, she spoke in a very hushed tone as she grinded her hips against mine. “I thought you said you wanted to keep this… our little secret,” she moaned.

I bit the side of my lip as her motions aroused me. I thought it was just a onetime thing because she was in heat. “Ahh…” I moaned as she started to pull off my pants with her magic, though it got stuck as my belt was still latched.

“But you know…” she trailed off, gently nibbling on the side of my ear. “If you rut me like last time, the whole neighbourhood is gonna hear,” she whispered, then yanked my pants clean off.

“M-mom! I… I…” my breathing kicked up as my heart started to race. She turned around and presented her voluptuous rump to my face. Her pristine and glistening pussy gleamed in the moonlight as she gave her flank a little wiggle.

“So tell me son. Do you love me enough to rut me even when I’m not in heat?” she asked coyly. My cock throbbed and I gulped. “Well how bout it? Care to fill mommy with your cum?” she asked.

I didn’t even think twice. I didn’t even get my boxers fully off, pulling them down just enough to get my stiff erection out. I simply grappled her from behind like a horny stallion, wrapping my arms around her stomach like a pony would. I didn’t even lead myself properly and just poked around with the head of my cock until I found her entrance.

Wiggling a bit, my cock forced her open and slid inside her with force. Not one to wait, my mother slammed her hips back against mine, taking my entire length in less than a second.

With a squeal, she began to grind her hips against mine, her inside walls clasping down around me. I started slowly, pulling my hips back and slowly indulging myself back into her.

I looked down to where all the magic was happening. I saw her pussy lips stretching around my thick cock as I pulled out, the slowly plunged myself back into her. Twilight spoke up in a squeaky voice. “Yes… yes, rut mommy. Fill her with your thick cock… mmm, you really know how to please mommy,” she whined.

I leaned my chest into her back and began rutting her just like a stallion would, the sensational feeling of pounding her pony pussy… it felt so good. “Oh mom… oh goddess, you feel so… tight,” I whispered into her ear, then licked up her neck.

Her body shivered, and her lower end tensed up. “Mmm, and you’re so big now. Who’s mommy’s best boy?” she asked. I answered by plunging deeper into her cunt. She let out a whiney moan and began to quicken her pace.

The sound of our love making echoed in the room, mixed in with the sounds of our pleasured moans. “Mom… I love you so much… you feel so good inside,” I whispered and she giggled.

“Prove it,” she replied and I raised a brow.

“H-how… I thought I was?” I replied. She stopped and rolled over.

“When you cum, do it inside, and scream my name as you keep thrusting,” she replied.

“Just… just scream your name?” I replied. It seemed like that really wasn’t a lot.

“Don’t call me mommy. Scream my actual name. Loud enough for Celestia to hear. I want everypony to know I’m your mare,” she said in a very naughty voice. I began to rock my hips into her.

“If that’s your wish… then it is to be my command, mother,” I replied and she raised a devious eyebrow. I just kissed her on the cheek. “I’m not cumming yet. You’ll just have to wait and be patient.”

I began to rock my hips again, pumping her deep and hard. She began to moan again, but sooner than I would’ve expected, I began to feel myself build up for that ever conclusive feeling of an orgasm.

“Uhh… oh goddess… mom,” I whispered, and somehow, she knew. I don’t know how she knew, but she knew I was close.

“Who do you love?” she moaned.

“You,” I replied through a grunt.

“Who do you love?” she moaned again, this time louder. I began to pick up my pace.

“You, I love you,” I moaned.

“Ooh… who do you love?” she squealed, nearly reaching her own orgasm.

“Y-… Twilight… oh goddess… I love you Twilight,” I moaned.

“Louder,” she ordered through an ecstatic moan.

“Twilight,” I replied.

“Louder!” she yelled.

“TWILIGHT!” I yelled, rocking faster and faster with each yell.

“Scream my name as you fill me!” She moaned loudly, her screams filling the room.

“Twilight… I love you,” I moaned, the tingly feeling in my cock suddenly becoming too much to bare. My legs began to tense up.

“Louder… shout my name. Shout that you… ahh… want me to be your mare,” she screamed, going wild as she hit her orgasm. Her inside walls began to clench as her body twitched and spasmed involuntarily.

“Twilight… I love Twilight… and… YOU’RE MY MARE!” I shouted, though staggeringly as my cock erupted inside of her, plastering her insides with my spooge. The feeling, I will admit, was heavenly and I swore there were clouds in my vision. My head, I felt light headed. As she had insisted, I kept thrusting, though slowly and heavily uncoordinated.

I flumped down on top of her, my cock still embedded into her dripping pussy, which oozed out a mixture of our fluids. She rubbed the back of my head with her hoof. “That’s wonderful. Mommy’s so proud of her little boy.” She began to hush me to sleep, humming lullabies.

As I lay on her, a wetness began to sprinkle on my back. At first it wasn’t too bad, but soon it became ever so present and cold. Then my bed was damp. The sprinkling kept hitting the back of my neck and sending shivers up my spine…

* * *

I shot straight up with a gasp, my hands clenched into fists. The entirety of my room flashed brilliant blue as a lightning strike flashed, being simultaneously followed by a crack of thunder.

Wetness still sprinkled against the back of my neck, and my body was soaked, both of sweat and… “Rain!” I grumbled. I looked to the open window Derreck had slipped in through.

The storm was so severe that the wind blew the rain straight into my room, and right onto my bed, soaking it profusely. I grumbled to myself as I got out of the drenched bed. I had the hardest erection and…

My thoughts quickly surfaced to that of my dream. I shuddered. “I… I can’t believe I’m dreaming about her like that,” I mumbled to myself. I had really thought it would’ve been a onetime thing, just because she was in heat, and hoped it wouldn’t faze me too much.

“Maybe it’s just residual thoughts… they’ll probably pass on in a few days and it’ll be just a thing of the past,” I said to myself… or maybe I was praying. Regardless of the fact, I needed to pi-

“Hey,” said a deep voice, scaring the shit out of me and nearly making me jump out of my skin.

“GAH! Derreck…” I looked down to see, that due to how much I needed to piss, and how much he scared me… I had pissed myself. “Oh… great… thanks a lot,” I grumbled angrily. ‘Well, at least now I don’t need to piss,’ I thought positively.

Derreck just stifled a laugh that ended up leaving through his nose. I just flicked off my pissy pants and underwear and grabbed a fresh pair of boxers. I looked at my camouflage pants. “Those are like… my favourite pants,” I stated.

I slipped on some brown trousers and looked for a shirt. I grabbed the one that had the smiling Mr. Clean, with the caption ‘Don’t fuck with Mr. Clean’. I looked over to my bed to see it was still being rained on.

I quickly rushed over and closed the window, but the damage had been done. With a whimpering yawn, I groaned. “That’s so fucking… sucky,” I swore vividly.

Before Derreck could speak up, Lassie came barreling down the stairs. “Evan, you need to come see this!” She gasped. I just waved, it was probably some grotesque spider on the television.

She huffed. “No seriously. You have to see this!” She announced.

Derreck spoke up. “In a second pup, we’re a little tied up trying to figure out what to do about his bed,” he said. Lassie gave a stunned look at him.

“Wha-“ she didn’t finish.

“Remember Derreck. The friend that met us on the balcony the day I got back from Flim and Flam’s?” I asked. Lassie blinked, unsurely.

“Oh… yeah…” she seemed a little stunned about something then just shook it off. “No, it’s more important than that!” she announced. Grabbing my shirt, she began pulling me towards the stairs. I just shrugged.

“Come on Derreck. Maybe we’ll find a bed on a couch or something for the night,” I stated. I followed her upstairs, and screaming could be heard from the television. Discord was hunched over, face nearly pressed into the television.

I looked and Discord turned to us. A reporter mare with a hoofheld microphone looked to the screen, like one of those horror movies where it pretended to be actual footage of something to make it seem more believable.

“Total anarchy here in Batlimare as-“ she was cut off as a crane structure erupted in a brilliant flash of sparks sparks and came smashing to the ground. I will admit, they made it look pretty believable and even Michael Bay would be jealous.

“Did you catch that? Tell me you caught that!” The reporter mare yelled. A hoof waved in front of the screen.

“I got it! I got it!” The voice behind the video recorder replied.

“As I was saying, total anarchy here in Baltimare as things are turned to complete ice as the-“ she was cut off again as a glass shattering sound echoed in the streets. A tidal wave of ice splashed against a building, turning the building into an ice-ified version of its former self.

Ponies rushing away from the building were also turned into solidified icy states, icicles stretching off their bodies. “Oh my sweet goddess Celestia. DID YOU SEE THAT?! Ponies turned into-“ she was cut off by a cackling laughter.

The camera turned to the top of a three story building, where an icy blue mare stood with some kinda… pipe looking thing in her hooves. With a bombing voice, though one that didn’t sound like she was trying to yell, she said something for all to hear. “Now… let’s get… some ICE!”

With that, her pipe thing hosed out a gushed out a stream of ice that turned everything it touched to ice-ified version of their former self. Within seconds the ice stream reached the camera and the screen began to beep out the test pattern.

Discord shut off the TV and I merely chuckled. “Oh come on… that’s such a funny looking movie,” I whined playfully but he shook his head.

“It’s not a movie,” he replied but I just rolled my eyes as I let out an exhale through my nose that was partially a stifle laugh.

“Yeah… okay. Because that wasn’t the horror movie network you two were watching all night. You’re probably trying to pull a bad prank on me, just like all those pranks you pulled on ponies,” I laughed and Discord shook his head again, but this time Lassie spoke up.

“It was our movie channel… until our movie was interrupted by an emergency broadcast. We tried to switch channels but everything was playing that… I thought maybe you should see it… I figured you’d probably want to do something,” Lassie stated. Discord picked up.

“It’s probably where they all went,” he stated and I turned to him. A sinking feeling in my gut answered my question pre-emptively, but I needed to know for sure.

“Where who went?” I asked.

“The Mane six… Twilight, Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash… and… and my dear… f-frie-friend Fluttershy… oh goddess… how could this have happened?” Discord whimpered, head drooping low.

“Fuck…” I whispered the swear to myself. “Who the hell was that?” I asked, heart thumping. Discord looked back up to the television, then to us as he answered.

“Freeze…”

Author's Note

Okay, sorry I didn't finish this chapter last weekend. On Friday last week, like back in July, I got a really bad pain in my mouth cause my top right wisdom tooth decided to grow in crooked and fuck up my mouth then it caused an infection. So after about a week of having an infection, I got it pulled out. So here, it's not really long, but it's kinda fun. Well, I think it was fun to write.
Have a good one, eh (Cause I'm Canadian, right)

Chapter 32

‘Battle of the puns…’

Later…

I gripped my hair and tugged on it stressfully as I slammed the brakes on Cadence and brought her to a complete stop. It was still somewhat dark out, and the sun wouldn’t rise for at least another hour.

I wrapped my arms around my head. “FFFFF… GAH FUCK!” I hissed. “Okay… okay… what the fuck… one more time…” I said, my heart thumping. I couldn’t believe this… this was way, way, WAY, out of my league.

Derreck sat in the passenger seat while Discord and Lassie sat in the back. Discord spoke up. “A very long time ago… there was this mare named Coldmare, or so the story goes… no pun intended,” he stated. “She was so hateful towards pony kind that eventually her hate brought about the windigos… and put her into a deep freeze,” he stated.

I gripped the steering wheel harder. “So… how the hell is she alive?!” I asked angrily. Discord just scratched the back of his head.

“Uhh, truthfully… I can’t really honesty answer that. I have no idea, but regardless, as the old folklore says… her skin… her fur, her mane… everything, somehow is preserved by the cold and she’s just like an average pony. Her blood however, was turned cold, her heart even colder… she’s harnessed the power to freeze things, though that cannon of her's is merely there to amplify her power. It’d take her weeks… probably months to freeze a city by herself,” Discord informed me.

“So… Celestia’s got a plan right? I mean… dispatch the royal guard or something?!” I asked fearfully, already partially knowing the answer. Discord bit his lower lip.

“At the moment… the royal sisters will probably quarantine the city until they devise a plan to defeat her… but without the mane six…” he trailed off and I swore angrily, slamming my fists into my thighs. “I’m sorry! You asked,” Discord flinched.

I muttered to myself. “What the fuck are we gonna do… goddess dammit, I’m such a fuckup!” I hissed and Discord rose an eyebrow.

“How… is this your fault?” he asked in absolute curiosity and I flailed my arms.

“Because! Because…” I trailed off. “Because the guilt always comes down on me! It always does!” I yelled, painful memories of back home resurfacing. All those times… no matter what it was, whether it be my brother shooting a window out of the truck, the VCR breaking… anything, it always came down on me somehow… and now this. I pinned my head to the steering wheel, blaring the horn wide open. “Mom… I’m so sorry… I fucked up!” I whispered, a tear coming to my eye.

Discord was again shocked. “Your… your mom?” he asked but Lassie stopped him, waving her paw and signalling him not to continue.

“Twilight… my mother, you know?” I replied and he leaned back in shock from what he just heard.

“You’re… yo-you’re k-kidding… r-right?” he stammered but I shook my head.

“She’s always been there for me… always cared for me, always given me shelter… took me in when I was so… such an asshole… and loved me just the same, no matter what,” I whispered and Discord gave a concerning look.

“Yes but uhm… she’s… your mother?” he asked and I nodded. “Uhm… she’s your age… how exactly does that work?” he asked and I rolled my head around.

“Becau… I… well she’s… she’s my mom, my care-taker… you know?” I said and he shook his head, the concerning look still on his face.

“I’m afraid I… don’t really follow you there,” he replied. Before I could answer, Derreck spoke up.

“Doesn’t matter. What does matter is that we need a plan to beat her. Besides, there’s four of us, and only one of her,” he stated but I brought up a point.

“There was the mane six… numbers didn’t seem to do much,” I intervened. Derreck rolled his eyes but Discord spoke up before he could.

“She’s not alone. With her magic, she can bring about the element of water, and all it's levels, solid, liquid or vapour... and… she somehow gives life to snowmares…” he stated and I just groaned.

‘Snowmares… really?’ I thought silently. Derreck just shrugged vicariously.

“Doesn’t matter… we got something not even the most elite royal guards have,” he stated. We looked over to him and he hefted up Violet, my Boito 590 clone, and racked the slide. “You said yourself… her body is just like a regular pony… so she’ll die like a regular pony too,” he said and Discord gulped.

“My goddess… you’re a cold bastard,” he commented and Derreck nodded.

“Don’t worry, I have a plan,” he said then looked to me. “To Rarity’s,” he ordered.

“But… she isn’t home,” I replied and he gave me a frown. “Okay, okay!” I said in my defense, putting the truck into drive and rushing down the empty streets. We arrived to the dark residence of Rarity’s boutique and all piled out of the vehicle.

Derreck walked up and tried the door, only to find it locked. “Sweetie Belle! Hey, you home?! Open up, it’s Rarity’s friend Derr… Burdy,” he yelled up, however, he got no response.

I leaned over to him. “You know… she doesn’t really live here. She lives with her parents and just comes to Rarity’s from time to time,” I stated. Derreck jerked on the door a bit more. “Besides, what do we need from Rarity’s anyways?” I asked.

Derreck stepped back and pressed Violet’s muzzle to the door handle. “DERRECK WAI-“ I yelled but was cut off by the thunderous KA-BOOM!

My ears rang as the door handle blew to pieces and the door gently swung open. Discord spoke up. “My-my… what an interesting way to unlock a door. I’ll have to remember that for later,” he muttered.

We all entered the residence, though I did so rather reluctantly. What on earth was so special in here that we needed to blow open Rarity’s front door… oh goddess she was gonna have a fit when she saw this.

Derreck pondered around. I spoke up, “Okay… so what are we looking for again?” Derreck continued to mosey around. “Derreck… what are we looking for?” I asked.

“A light,” he stated and I gasped.

“A light… a light? A FUCKING LIGHT?! Goddess dammit! We blew open Rarity’s front door so you could find a fucking light?! I have a light in my truck!” I roared and he waved his hand at me, motioning me to settle down.

“One thing at a time Burdy… I meant, I’m looking for a light switch so we can…” he trailed off and there was a ‘CLICK’ and suddenly the entire boutique lit up brilliantly. “Ah… there we are,” he said triumphantly.

I looked around, noticing the splinters off wood spewed across the ground from Derreck’s entry technique. “Okay… so what do we need again that was so important you had to blow open Rarity’s front door?” I asked, a little agitated.

“Clothes,” he informed me casually, spreading open a closet door and mingling through the apparel. I just blinked in disbelief.

“Clothes?” I asked, a little hushed due to my shock. He nodded and continued to browse. “We have clothes,” I stated and he rolled his eyes.

“No… not just any clothes… clothes-clothes,” he told me and I blinked. I just rubbed my nose between my eyes while I groaned.

“Oh muh goddess… Rarity is gunna blow a head gasket…” I groaned. Derreck tapped my shoulder. I looked up and saw he had a white trench coat, made of thick leather. “It looks… uhm…” I trailed off and he nodded.

“Yeah, not really my color eh?” he asked and I nodded. He hung it across a line and pulled out a can of spray paint.

“DERRECK WAI-“ I tried but it was too late. He had already begun spraying, what I could only perceive to be, an expensive white leather jacket into a jet black. “Oh goddess...” I groaned.

Derreck spoke up to the others. “Hey guys… grab something you like, and remember… it could be the last thing you ever wear,” he commented. Discord and Lassie immediately zipped off.

“Derreck… we didn’t really need to steal this stuff,” I told him and he just shrugged.

“If we die… we might as well die in style,” he commented and I just groaned. I heard Lassie pipe up from another room.

“AWWWW THIS IS SO COOL! WHAT DO YOU THINK IT IS?!” She asked, coming out tromping around in an expensive diamond dress, many sizes too big for her. It looked like a dazzling wedding dress that was to be worn only by Equestria's most elite. Lassie's claws shredded the dress fabric as she tromped along, but eventually she got tangled up in the mess and squirmed around, shredding the dress apart.

I just face-palmed… Rarity was going to be sooo pissed. Lassie squirmed around and rushed off again. “LASSIE! DON’T… wreck too much stuff…” I whined. Derreck tossed me a black leather trench coat that looked a little small to be a trench coat for me, probably being intended for ponies much rather than humans.

I looked at the coat and noticed a black t-shirt in the clump as well… a black t-shirt with a white holy cross in the middle. Before I could say anything, Derreck also tossed me a pair of black leather pants. “They were from the bigger and taller section… so they’ll probably fit.

I just sighed and tried them on. They weren’t too tight, but didn’t offer a lot of clearances and really chaffed at my crotch. I tried on the shirt and coat also. Like I had thought, the coat only went down past my waist, ending just before my mid-thigh.

Lassie came back dressed in a white formal dress that I could tell she tore apart to make it fit her better. She also had a pair of black fingerless gloves… “Wait… Lassie, where did you find fingerless gloves? Ponies don’t have fingers,” I mentioned and she shrugged.

“They didn’t have the holes in the first place. I had to cut them so I could fit my paws in them,” she said, wiggling her paw digits through the holes. There was also a space on the backside of the gloves that was open, revealing the back side of her paw with a strap that laced along the backside of her wrists, or ankles. At this point I wasn’t sure whether to start calling her forepaws paws… or dog hands…

She flumped down to all fours and displayed herself in a stunning way. “SASSY LASSIE!” She laughed and I just rolled my eyes. Discord came out, dressed in a formal black suit with a white undershirt.

Derreck spoke up. “This is going to be a battle, not a wedding,” he commented and Discord nodded.

“You’re right about one thing. There'll be no wedding… but rather, a funeral,” he commented. Derreck slipped on apparel that was identical to mine.

I looked to Derreck. “Okay… so we broke into Rarity’s house… wrecked her belongings so we could vandalize her clothes… now what?”

* * *

Desert garage…

“YOU WHAT?!” Flam gasped, and Flim chimed in.

“That’s insanity!” he added.

Derreck just shook his head. “Got a better plan?” he asked the two and they both nodded and answered in unison.

“Let the royal sisters deal with it. They’ll come up with a plan.”

Derreck just shook his head. “It might come too late. We have to act now!” he ordered them and they just shook their heads.

Flam spoke first. “No way… besides, it’s not even finished!” he commented and Derreck gave them a glare then sent shivers down their spines.

“It starts?” he asked and they nodded. “It drives?” he asked and they nodded again. “Then it runs,” he commented and they pointed to Cadence.

“If all you need is a running vehicle, why not use her,” he stated and Derreck looked back to Cadence, then to the armored vehicle they were building.

“Because that one is a smaller target, it’s quieter, and it’s got some working gadgets,” he replied. They simply bit their lips.

“This… this is madness!” Flam shouted and Derreck looked at him.

“Madness?… this-is-Sparta!” he shouted back and both the brothers looked at him with puzzled looks. Derreck shook his head. “Nothing, don’t worry about it,” he commented. “We’re taking the truck,” he said and Flim tensed up with a whiny retort.

“That’s… that’s not fair! Why don’t we get a say in this?!” he asked rhetorically, already knowing the answer.

“Because I said so,” Derreck stated. Flam spoke up.

“Even with the gadgets… how are you going to stop her?” he asked and Derreck unslung Violet. Flam just blinked. “Oh… right... those,” he said, blushing deeply as he scratched the back of his head.

Flim piped up. “Even with those… weapons of mass destruction… you might not be able to defeat her. Have you seen the news?!” he gasped and we all nodded. He just bit his lip but Flam stomped his hoof excitedly.

“I KNOW!...” He trailed off then chuckled nervously. “Well… I might know something that’ll even the playing field… but I only have one,” he informed then rushed off.

He brought back some kinda… earpiece gizmo. “We were constructing it for you. It isn’t quite finished and still has some bugs in it,” he commented. He handed it over to me. There was a little earpiece hooked up to some little slate of metal that came forwards across the side of my face and angled in slightly as if it were to cover my eye, but stopped just at the corner of my eye.

“What is it?” I asked.

Flam spoke first, ruining Flim’s thunder. “It’s the Eagle Eye, constructed just for you,” he said and Flim pushed him out of the way.

“I was supposed to say that! It was my idea!” he whined like a little colt.

“What does it do?” I asked, tapping the piece of metal.

Flam pushed Flim out of the way and spoke. “Many things,” he stated, then ran a piece of wire from the... Eagle Eye, down my right arm and to my watch. Flim slapped him across the face, leaving a red mark.

“It’s my invention! I get to explain it!” he commented and Flam slapped him back, leaving and equally red mark on the other’s face.

“As I was saying,” Flam said, but Flim slapped his other cheek, reddening it as well.

“As ‘I’ was saying, there is a button on the piece that attaches to your ear, press it now,” he ordered and I did so. A little holographic screen flashed up in front of my right eye.

“Woah!” I gasped and he nodded.

“Now, if you notice, there is also a menu of options,” he commented and I nodded. “To use them, simply use the dial near the nine o’clock location on your watch. It’ll only work while the Eagle Eye is attached to your watch though,” he stated.

I began to scroll through the menu. There were a few things, but mostly just tabs, a heads up display option and a map option that could apparently be adjusted between two variations of zoom, and somehow it displayed my vital signs. “Okay… so this is all interesting but how do I select things?” I asked.

“The button at the three o’clock,” he stated and I looked.

“Wait… doesn’t that shoot the tranquilizer shot or whatever?” I asked and he nodded.

“Only when your watch isn't wired to the Eagle Eye. When plugged it, the Eagle Eye overrides the other watches functions, so you’ll have to unplug it if you want to use the watch gadgets,” he responded.

“Drawbacks,” I muttered and he gasped.

“Drawbacks? Drawbacks?!” he gasped. “ARE YOU BUCKING KIDDING ME?! This is the most sophisticated technology on the face of the planet and you say it has drawbacks!?” he gasped and I nodded.

“Even the best equipment to offer has drawbacks,” I stated and he just groaned but as he did, Flam slapped his other cheek, reddening it worse than his own.

“Yes, well, my brother tends to make such buggy equipment from time to time, however those drawback have lessened the size and bulk of you watch considerably,” he noted and I nodded. “As you can probably tell, it can display a screen with just your vital signs, also displays an x-ray scan of your body, so you can see any fractured limbs, damaged vital organs, foreign objects stuck in your body… etc.” he stated.

“Nice, how’d you work that in?” I asked and he just shrugged, not giving me an answer.

“Now, if you look to the map, you can see there’s two levels of zoom,” he told me and I nodded. “One is a larger format that shows towns you’ve been to, cities, etc.” he said. “The other is a shorter distance map, showing the layouts of buildings, streets, and any other smaller location you are at… however there is a drawback to the latter,” he stated. “To show the layout, you must explore the building with the Eagle Eye. It won’t have a pre-loaded layout of the building. But with that being said, it’ll come in handy if you ever get lost… say in a metro-tunnel or something,” he said positively.

“Interesting,” I commented. It kind of reminded me of a strategy game map now that he mentioned it. Everything in the mini-map was dark except the places I had been. “Anything else this thing can do?” I asked and he nodded.

“If you go to the heads up display,” he waited for me to scroll through. “Now, you’ll notice that there’s an option to scan things,” he offered and I nodded. “The Eagle Eye can detect weaknesses in structural integrity, armor weaknesses… and sometimes it can even detect weaknesses in ponies, such as heart conditions and such,” he opted.

I looked to the combat vehicle and clicked the scan option. A laser screen flashed over it, revealing the skeletal x-ray of the vehicle, and pinpointing in red the fuel tank and flashing it red several times. “It says the fuel tank’s a weakness,” I said and Flam looked over to the battle vehicle.

“Well yes… I suppose if an explosive of some sort was to detonate underneath the fuel tank… it could be devastating,” he stated.

Flim spoke up, “Oh, and it also has a targeting computer,” he added in but Flam just scoffed.

“That’s bugged.”

“Well… well, it isn’t quite perfected just yet. You see, when you’re heart rate goes up considerably, the Eagle Eye automatically detects any enemy in your vicinity and highlights them in a red diamond. Or you can activate the targeting computer manually,” He stated.

Flam spoke up. “Activate it manually and see why it’s plagued with bugs,” he commented. I turned on the targeting computer and it lit up both Flim and Flam, also adding two red pointing arrows to my left and one to my right. I looked to my right and saw it had targeted Derreck. Looking to my left, I saw it had also targeted Lassie and Discord.

“Wha…” I trailed off and Flam laughed while Flim sighed.

“I couldn’t… really figure out how to make the Eagle Eye define whether the target is a hostile… or a friendly,” he commented.

Flam laughed, chiming in his opinion. “So it paints everything as a hostile instead,” he laughed. I looked, noticing that the red arrows indicated targets outside my line of view, which was kind of neat. The only real downside was that because it only covered my right eye, when I looked to the distance, the screen became distorted and blurry. I covered my left eye with my hand while I looked distantly.

“Too bad it doesn’t cover both eyes,” I mentioned then turned off the Eagle Eye. “It’s cool though,” I said and they nodded.

Derreck shrugged. “Okay… if we’re all done and happy, let’s roll out,” he commented. Discord blinked.

“Maybe perhaps… you should teach me how to use a gun, if you’re dragging me along on this… this… crusade,” he commented.

“Later. On the way,” Derreck replied, opening the large toolbox on the back of my truck. “Here, Discord, you can have this one,” he said, offering Discord Violet. He grabbed Applebloom, my SKS, from her case and gave it to Lassie. “Lassie,” he said.

He rummaged through and grabbed a case that read 'Nightshade' and opened it up. Inside was a real Mossberg 590A1 combat, with ghost ring sights. On each side of the black synthetic stock was a shell holder, each holding two additional shells, giving me four extra all together.

In reality, even though Violet was a clone, I liked her better due to the fact she had a full twenty inch barrel, vs. Nightshade’s sixteen. Added to the fact Violet had a telescoping stock and seven shot tubular magazine, whereas Nightshade had a fixed stoack and only a five round tube, though I could hold six if I trimmed down the crimp on the top of a shell.

The only real advantage I had with the M590A1 was the ability to chamber 3” shells. Derreck kept rummaging through the toolbox, then started with the other, but only found ammunition. “Hey, what’d you call that fifty?” he asked.

“Belladonna?” I replied, figuring he was talking about my handgun.

“No-no… that .50bmg… you know, the Steyr H.S.?” He asked.

“I never bought it,” I replied and he went still.

“What?” he asked in disbelief.

“I… never bought it?” I replied questioningly.

“Why!?” he gasped in shock.

“Man… it was like… a seven thousand dollar rifle… then you had to add a really, really, REALLY nice scope, not some entry level crap that'd insult the rifle… so that’d be like… at least another fifteen hundred. Then ammo is like… five bucks a piece, probably more cause you’d want match grade… overall, you’d end up spending well over ten grand… on one friggin’ rifle,” I stated and Derreck just blinked.

“So?” he replied casually.

“So… so… SO! I didn’t have ten grand to blow out my ass on a goddamned rifle!” I replied and he just groaned.

“Fine…” he trailed off in a huff and came back over to the first box he was looking through. Grabbing No-name, my SVT-40, he racked back the slide and checked the bore. “This’ll have to do,” he said, then let the slide slam shut.

Flim spoke up. “Oh, wait!” He rushed off and soon returned with an old styled camera. “If you are successful… this’ll be one for the history books,” he commented, “Now… if you’ll all stand together please,” he gestured. We all stood, together, Lassie on her hindlegs so we could sort of be shoulder to shoulder. Flim then flashed the picture.

The camera spat out a black piece of negative that'd still need t be developed. Flim smiled. “All right… we’ll just load up some extra cans of diesel in the back so you can make the trip,” he said with a smile…

* * *

Thursday, May 14th, 2014…

It was early morning, and we had been on the road for about two days now, going none stop and only stopping for food and washroom breaks. Derreck and I switched between driving, and even tried to teach Lassie how to drive. But… well, after a few ditches and curbs, we decided against it.

While I drove, Derreck taught Discord and Lassie the fundamentals about both of their guns, and despite going into a combat situation, he even taught them a bit about gun safety and how to never point a gun at another pony under regular circumstances.

Discord wasn’t exactly content on the idea of saving Equestria… whether it be out from a chip on his shoulder for the country, or perhaps the idea of killing for peace… dunno. Lassie was more neutral, either that or she showed no emotion so far.

A bead of sweat rolled down my face and I turned up the air conditioner a bit more. Funny… leather seats, air conditioning… it really didn’t feel like a combat vehicle. The distinctive shape of the armored canopy fusing into the main cab really gave the truck that Gurkha F5 look, but the front was more squared off like Cadence. The armored plating made it look more like an armored vehicle but the interior was so… non-combat looking, and decorative.

As the interior cooled down, I chuckled to myself. Seeing as how we were going to be going into a freezing cool city, I figured I’d like to be warm as long as I could on the trip there… but traversing through the open fields in the scorching sun made me change my mind fast… maybe Celestia was making it so hot in an attempt to thaw the city, I really didn’t know yet.

In the far out distance, I could see a blizzard cloud over a city, which from here looked tiny. I brought the truck to a stop, and flicked off the air conditioning. I looked to my watch. ‘0835’ it read. “Hey… psst, guys,” I tried to wake them. Derreck was passed out in the passenger seat while Discord and Lassie sprawled out on the row seats in the back.

I blared on the horn and everyone jolted awake. “We’re about… an hour away. This may be the last time we get a warm meal,” I told them. Discord clucked his tongue and looked out the window.

“Where… I don’t see a restaurant for miles,” he commented. I brought up a frying pan and eggs.

“Ever had motor eggs?” I asked and he rose and eyebrow. "Didn't think so." I left the engine running and popped the hood. Unlike the Gurkha, the truck shared a similar hood release to Cadence… or maybe they were the same, I had never operated a Gurkha F5 before.

I put on an oven mitt and walked out to the front of the vehicle and opened the hood, then removed the cover over the head of the hot engine block. I placed the frying pan over the engine and Discord just blinked in disbelief.

“You’re not… really going to do that… are you?” he asked and I nodded.

“It was easier with older cars that had flat heads… and gasoline engines, they burned hotter, but this’ll do,” I commented. I waited for the pan to heat up a bit, sometimes leveling out the pan again with my mitt hand.

“Okay, Derreck, bring me the eggs,” I ordered. He not only brought me some eggs, but some potatoes and bread as well.

“I bet we could toast these,” he said, holding the bread up. I blinked.

“It’d be greasy,” I stated and he nodded.

“Just like good ol’ Mickey D’s,” he commented. With the potatoes and the eggs in the frying pan however, there was no room for the bread and he simply slapped the bread right onto the engine block head, using my thick Bowie knife to flip the bread.

Lassie hopped up to her hindlegs, placing her forepaws on the edge of the truck as see peeked at the engine. With a long, loud sniff, she rubbed her bully with a slurp. “MMM! Smells good!” She giggled with excitment.

Discord looked down at it and blinked. “Indeed… it looks delicious,” he spoke his mind, though I wasn’t sure if he was being believably sarcastic, or if he was truly serious.

Derreck chuckled. “Breakfast of champions… well, for greasers anyways,” he said. I gave the pan a shuffle, then used my Buck knife to flip the potatoes to make sure they didn’t burn.

Derreck’s toast finished first, though it was stained with a bit of oil. In another few minutes, I finished the eggs and potatoes. Lassie grabbed a canteen full of juice, though it tasted a little like Kool-Aid. I remember buying it before we left… sugary and sweet, but probably not good for trying to suffice hydration.

Using paper plates and cups, we each took our share. Pouring us all cups of the sweet sugar juice, Derreck held up his cup. “Well… here’s to saving Equestria… or dying horribly while trying,” he joked. We all rose our cups and nodded. He looked to us. “Anyone want to add anything?” he asked.

Discord didn’t say anything, simply looking down and I spoke up. “Well… I’m glad to have you all here… helping me... helping Equestria, even if it might be in vein. I’m grateful that Flim and Flam offered us this tech gear… and I’m grateful to be alive, even if it might not be for much longer,” I said aloud.

Lassie spoke up. “Hey, I’m just glad this shit tastes good,” she said, sneaking a mouthful of potatoes from Discord’s plate. We all laughed and chuckled and tilted back our cups.

Derreck nodded. “For honor,” he stated.

“For freedom,” I added in.

“For love,” Lassie chimed. I wasn’t exactly expecting Discord’s answer, but it was suitable all the same.

“For friendship,” he added the finale and we all nodded.

* * *

Third person,

Baltimare, Freeze’s super-secret hideout…

Freeze looked down upon the city from her throne at the top of her ice castle that was by far the tallest building in the city, having been constructed with pure ice. The castle tower stood out like a sore thumb among the frozen city, even with most all the other buildings having been turned to ice.

“Today’s forecast… frosty,” she commented, swishing around a glass of nearly freezing booze that was now looking more like a slushy. Three snowmares rushed into the room.

“Ma’am, intruders have penetrated the city limits,” the leader of the group informed the cold leader. Freeze simply closed her eyes, taking a deep inhale through her nostrils.

She turned around graciously, taking a sip from her drink, then spewed it at her disciple, turning her completely to ice. “Imbecilic! I told you to make sure nopony else enters or leaves the city! You said you could handle it and this is what you give me? Failure!” she yelled at the immobilized creature she had created.

Throwing her drink at it, she used her magic to turn the liquor into ice shards that pieced the frozen snowmare and shattered the body apart. "Let this be a lesson to the rest of you!" she yelled loudly and they all rushed away. She felt her heart beating rapidly and she slowly calmed her breathing. She went back over to her throne chair and sat down, leaning her face into her hoof with a sighing, wide-eyed look.

“Haa… ahh,” she sighed. “I hate getting into heated arguments,” she punned.

* * *

Burdy’s perspective,

Streets of Baltimare…

I took the corner sharp and the vehicle slid out. A tablet folded down from the interior roof of the vehicle. I thought it was a sunglasses holder. A screen flickered on and Flim appeared on screen.

“Burdy, it appears that your vehicle is in need of more traction-“ he began but I went to cut him off.

“Whoa, Flim, how’d you know that the vehicle lost traction?” I gasped but he continued to talk over me, almost as if he hadn’t heard me. “Hey, can you hear me?” I asked but Derreck tapped me on the shoulder.

“It’s an automated message, probably signalled to play when the vehicle sensed it lost control… kinda like traction control,” he stated then pressed a button on the tablet and rewound the video to the beginning.

“Burdy, it appears that your vehicle is in need of more traction,” the automated message of Flim began. “If you’re ever in a spot that requires more traction, simply activate enhanced traction by pressing the ‘Action’ button. That will employ enhanced traction,” he stated and I blinked. What was this, a videogame? Action button?

Flim stepped aside and Flam stepped up. “The action button is the blue button on the dashboard, the one to the direct left of the button that looks like a drunk stallion eyeing you up from across the bar,” he informed me. I looked in disbelief as I saw the button that did indeed look like a stallion eyeing me up, a bottle of booze in his hoof.

“Whatta yah think that button does?” I asked, pointing to the drunk stallion button. Derreck held his hand over mine.

“Let’s not find out,” he said. I nodded and pressed the blue ‘Action’ button. An X-ray blueprint came up on the tablet display, showing the truck. It zoomed in on the tires and as it did so, spikes sprang out from the tires, piercing the ground.

I opened the door and briefly looked out, seeing that there was indeed spikes sticking out of the tires, probably an inch and a half to two inches thick. “Whoa…” I trailed off and slammed the door behind me. “That is some total James Bond shit right there,” I stated and Derreck nodded as the tablet closed. “What else do you think this rig can do?” I asked curiously and Derreck shrugged.

“For now, let’s just find Freeze,” he stated and I nodded, hammering down on the accelerator. The enhanced traction was amazing. Though I wasn’t able to achieve high speeds, the grip the truck had on the ground made tight turns a breeze.

As we cornered a street, I noticed a blockade with snowmares all around. “Oh shit!” I cursed but Derreck just chuckled.

“Just drive through it… if it really is a combat vehicle, it should be able to pile through some snow,” he commented and I did just that. I picked up to the top speed the enhanced traction would allow, which was only about sixty kilometers an hour, and barreled right into the road block.

The packed snow burst into fluff as we smashed through and simply kept going as if nothing was even there. “Easy peasy,” Derreck commented, looking back to see the snowmares trying to run after us. “Now…” he said, sitting upright. “If I were a crazy, lunatic mare with freezing powers… where would I hide in a winter wonderland?” he asked aloud.

Lassie walked up to the front cabin and pointed to a humongous ice castle. “I’d hide in there… nice and cozy cold,” she stated. I nodded and raced towards the huge ice palace castle thing. It was so luminous. There were dark clouds surrounding it, along with a blizzard.

The truck rumbled along and soon enough, I was thinking about the vehicle more and more. “What should we name her?” I asked, and everyone looked to me.

“Who? Freeze?” Lassie asked and I shook my head then patted the dashboard. “The truck!?” Lassie gasped and I nodded.

Discord spoke up. “Why name it?” he asked curiously.

I just shrugged. “Ah dunno… I name my guns and even my other truck,” I replied.

Lassie spoke up. “We’ll think about it. For now we’ll just call it the truck,” she stated and I nodded. Before I knew it, we had arrived up to the front of the castle. An ominous shiver rattled my spine, but perhaps that was just the wind.

I killed the engine then gulped. It was a diesel… I just hoped we weren’t gone so long that the engine refused to start when we got back. Flim and Flam said it would run but also said the truck wasn’t finished.

We all grabbed our gear. Discord and I were loaded with shotgun bandoliers while Lassie had pouches full of stripper clips and Derreck had extra magazines, courtesy of Flim and Flam. I’d really have to thank them for this…

A smile crept across my face and a tear formulated in my eye. Lassie must’ve noticed because she spoke on it. “Something wrong?” she asked and I just wiped the tear away.

“Oh… nothing, just a little nippy is all,” I said. Thinking back on it… I had never formally forgiven those two after the Manehatten incident… and they truly deserved it now, but I may never be able to tell them.

I just smiled and racked the slide on Nightshade. Derreck spoke up “Alright… Burdy and I will take lead. Lassie, I want you covering our three o’clock, Discord on our nine in tight formation. Don’t overlap lines of fire,” he ordered but Discord spoke up.

“Actually… it might be a better idea if we split up,” he commented and we all looked to him. He brought up a defensive paw. “I’m just saying… we heavily outclass her now that we have these guns,” he said inquiringly.

Lassie spoke up. “Yeah… but in the movies, when they split up, that’s when all the bad stuff always happens,” she stated. I chimed in, but a little more on Discord’s side.

“Lassie… this isn’t really a movie,” I stated and she rolled her eyes.

“It could be, I mean come on, think about it. Crazy bad guy with superpowers, world’s fate coming down to the shoulders of a guy, err two guys, a dragon goat and a talking dog,” she commented but Derreck piped in his opinion.

“Discord may be right… the place is big enough it could take us hours to clear. Added to the fact we don’t know if she’ll try and make an escape then bring the whole place crashing down on our heads,” he stated. I gulped from the thought of it. What if this was a trap?

I nodded. Lassie spoke up. “What?! this is crazy, splitting up and going it all alone. We could all die horribly. Besides, even if we do all go alone, what’s to say she might not find a way to sneak past us and get out?” she mentioned.

I rubbed my head. This just got way more difficult than it had to be. Discord spoke up. “Well… what if Lassie stays with the truck-“ he began but Lassie intervened.

“WOAH! Why the hell are you deciding to leave me behind?! The one that gets left behind always gets it first,” she gasped.

Discord spoke up. “Because those two have invaluable combat experience, they can’t be left behind,” he stated.

“Why the hell don’t you just stay behind and watch the truck then?” she asked. Discord swallowed and thought for a moment.

“Well... because…” he trailed off and scratched his head. “You see, I don’t actually know how to drive that vehicle, so if we needed to make a quick getaway, at least you somewhat know how to drive it. I’d opt to leave Burdy behind due to his driving abilities, but not only is he one of the most experienced with this weaponry, he also has that little eye gadget thing,” he stated.

I immediately caught on to what he was saying. “Oh yeah… I could mark you guys and if we got lost, we could use the map thingy to backtrack,” I stated and he nodded.

“Precisely my point,” Discord said. Lassie grumbled to herself and sat in the driver seat, slamming the door.

I went over and tapped on the window but she wouldn’t answer. I tried the door but it was locked. “Aww… come on Lassie, it’s not like we don’t want you as part of the team or something,” I commented.

“That’s exactly it,” she said back, her voice muffled by the truck's closed interior. She was scorned as all hell.

I just sighed. “That is totally not it,” I said and the door opened quicker than I could react, clipping my knee and making me wince in slight pain.

“Then what is it? Why can’t I come along. It’s just: Oh Lassie, stay in the truck, you’ll only get in the way,” she said, a tear almost forming in her eye. I just tossed my hands.

“No… Discord’s right. We may need a quick getaway, and we need someone who knows how to drive,” I told her.

“But what if you need me in there?” she asked.

“But what if we need you out here?” I asked back.

“Well what if you all die in there?” she asked back.

I took a deep breath. “Then I need you to drive… just drive out of here and race to Canterlot. Tell Celestia or Luna, make them listen… make them know this is serious and that they have to act on it immediately before it spreads,” I told her.

Tears welted up in her eyes and she sniffled before grabbing me into a tight hug. “Promise you’ll come back!” she cried and I held her tightly, her cold tears trickling onto my neck.

“I can’t promise that… but I promise I’ll do my best,” I replied and she squeezed tighter.

“You better,” she told me before leaning back and slobbering a wet dog kiss up my cheek. I gave her a kiss to the side of her muzzle.

“I will, promise,” I said and she held out her pinky index paw digit. I smiled. It had been a helluva long time since I did a pinky finger promise. I took my pinky finger and shook hers.

With that, she closed the door, and even though I couldn’t see her, I could feel her watching us as we departed. I felt bad for leaving her behind, I truly did. But Discord was right. We should divide and conquer.

We all entered the castle through the only entrance and immediately split up…

* * *

Third person…

Discord rounded a corner, shotgun at the ready just like Derreck had taught him. Looking around he made sure no one else was near as he made his way over to an open window which gusted cold air and blizzard snow into the castle.

He slipped out the window and took flight, zipping up as fast as he could to the top of the castle, to the throne room. Entering through an open window, he leveled his shotgun’s sights at eye level, scanning the room.

“Cool yer jets,” punned a feminine voice. Discord spun around to see Freeze standing there, unarmed and in but a simple white robe, with giant sparkling snowflakes fluttering off the robe.

“I’ve done what you wanted, now release her!” Discord snarled and Freeze just laughed at the draconequus, almost insultingly.

“Hardly. I told you to bring him to me,” she said and he nodded.

“I have. Here he is, in your city, in your caslte, just like you asked. I brought him through the tunnel you said would be open and unguarded. Now release her!” he barked his order but Freeze simply laughed and held up a snow globe of Baltimare.

Shaking it slightly, she covered the entire miniature town in snow. “You see… I have turned Baltimare... into a winter wonderland… a perfect state… of cold,” she punned. Discord didn’t quite get the pun and just shook his head.

“You promised if I brought him here that you’d release her!” Discord snapped but she held up her hoof.

“Yes… to me, not just to my castle. Have you forgotten so easily? Perhaps I may forget and simply smash their frozen bodies into pieces, would you like that?” She asked and Discord just shook his head begrudgingly. She lifted up a snow globe of Canterlot.

“Soon… Canterlot will succumb to my cold grip… then with nopony to lead them, all of Equestria will bow down to me… before they are frozen to ice!” she laughed manically. She then turned to Discord. “But first… I need to rid myself of that metalling… monkey, and his guns… and you’re going to lead me to him, and then… and then I will release your friend Stuttershy,” she said and Discord growled.

“Fluttershy!” he snapped back and she simply swished herself around, flicking her tail at him in the most carefree way. She knew, that if he killed her, her ice would remain, and all the ponies would remain frozen as well, and when the clouds dispersed and the sun began to thaw them, they may simply shatter from the pressure change.

“I don’t care what her name is. Go, before I find a more competent disciple!” She barked. He nodded and reluctantly left. He looked to his side and saw the mane six, frozen in ice, all with petrified looks on their faces. However, none looked as petrified as the poor, shy, timid pegasus known as Fluttershy, whom had a look on her face like she saw the world ending before her very eyes…

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…

I had met up with Derreck after I heard him yelling for me, stating he had lost himself and was travelling in circles. We began using my Eagle Eye map, which worked wonders, to find our way up the castle.

As we neared the top, or at least, I think it was the top, Discord came racing down. “Hurry, I found her!” he gasped, panting and out of breath, his suit torn and shredded.

“What happened?” I asked, worried for his well-being.

“No time to explain, this way!” he rushed off and we quickly ran after him, weapons at the ready.

We embarked flights and flights of icy stairs, almost slipping from time to time despite my heavy work boots. Finally, we reached a set of throne room doors, constructed of ice just like the rest of the castle.

Flat icicles dangled down, almost looking like gigantic banners or something. On the throne room doors where giant frosted snowflakes. With a charge, we burst into the throne room, only to find void of Freeze.

I rushed in blindly, not checking my blind spots first. As I reached near the center of the room, I stopped, spotting six frozen mares. I rushed over and nearly dropped to my knees, tears forming in my eyes.

“Ahhuhuhu… mom,” I whimpered, grasping the frozen, icified version of my mother. “No… no, please… please don’t be gone,” I began to sniffle a little, my tears freezing as soon as they touched her icy body. It stung my cheek skin a little but I didn’t bother with the pain. “Please… I’m so sorry… I’m sooo sorry,” I cried, tears now flowing from my eyes.

A sinister laugh echoed throughout the room and I spun up, immediately leveling my shotgun. Derreck and Discord also had their weapons up and ready. “If you would please… drop yer weapons, put yer hands in da air… and freeze,” said the voice just before a beam of ice shot at me.

I leapt out of the way, ice splattering the ground where I had been only seconds before. I looked up to the ceiling where a mare stood on a rafter of ice. She jumped down but used her ice cannon to create slide that she glided down on her hindlegs, using her forelegs to hold the cannon device.

“Wasn’t dat entrance… cool?” she asked before trying to blast me again. I jumped out of the way again, rolling to my feet. Derreck lined up a few good shots and fired. The SVT-40 pumped out 185g full metal jacket ammunition with sonic trajectory.

The first shot sparked off her cannon, the second as well, knocking it out of her grip. The other shots all connected with her chest. Despite having some kind of super heavy armor on that was constructed entirely of ice, the jacketed ammunition managed to penetrate deep enough to puncture her skin.

A bit of blood trickled out of her but she simply looked up at us and smiled. Those shots should have been absolutely fatal. “Ahh… a deadly shot to the heart,” she commented, and raised her forelegs into the air and blew a misty fog upwards that gently settled back down on her.

“As long as I am in the cold… my body can regenerate my wounds, even some of the most fatal ones,” she commented. I just groaned.

“Oh… that’s a stupid rule,” I replied and she just laughed.

“That’s the cold hard reality,” she said before spewing a freezing mist towards me. I rolled again and fired. The 000buckshot hammered into her armor but didn’t penetrate deep enough to do any significant injury other than knock her back.

However, in knocking her back, I put her in arm’s length of her freeze cannon, which she immediately grabbed before leaping back up. I turned on the Eagle Eye. “Eagle Eye, target Freeze,” I said vocally as I manually targeted only Freeze, leaving Discord and Derreck out. A red triangle illuminated around Freeze. ‘This thing should’ve totally been in a Bond movie!’ I thought silently.

Freeze leveled her cannon at me. “Stay cool, bird boy,” she punned before firing at me. I leapt behind a row of seats which were splashed with ice. I smiled. Even Freeze knew my nickname… I must’ve been making a name for myself back home.

I peeked up and fired my shotgun again, but again it failed to penetrate deep enough to kill her. This time however, the buckshot slammed into her shoulder, spinning her slightly. Derreck popped off several shots which hammered deep enough to slice into her skin and draw blood, but apparently didn’t penetrate right through her body. I wondered to myself just how thick that ice armor was.

I looked around. Where the hell was Discord and why wasn’t he shooting. I disregarded the thought, figuring I had more important things on hand. Freeze fired at Derreck, forcing him behind an ice pillar. She turned back to me.

“You know what the best part of a cake is?” she asked aloud. “THE ICING!” She cackled a pun. ‘Oh great… she almost has an Arnie accent and she’s stealing all the puns!’ I thought angrily as I dodged the beam.

I lined up my ghost ring sights and popped off several rounds, each gunshot roaring and echoing in the confines of the throne room. After several shots, there was a defining ‘CLICK’ as the shotgun dry fired, having been empty.

“Shit!” I cursed as I tried furiously to reload my shotgun in time. Derreck popped off more shots before diving for cover as his rifle too ran dry.

Freeze moved in on me. “Refrigerate after opening,” she punned.

‘Okay… that one didn’t even make sense,’ I thought silently to myself. I rolled out from behind the rows of chairs and she blasted my trail, ice splattering just inches behind me. I kept rushing, trying painfully to escape her wrath.

I managed to get behind a pillar. I heard Freeze’s footsteps closing in. I ran through the list of possible options. The guns seemed to do something, though it wasn’t as potent as it would be to a regular pony. I’d guess that at this rate, we’d have to pump a few dozen rounds into her… at least.

I thought something up as I closed my eyes with a smirk. A memory from a little while back…

“As long as it isn’t absolutely necessary.” I replied and Celestia chuckled.

“I don’t believe a situation like that would occur in your lifetime.” She told me and I nodded…

“It’s a situation like that in my lifetime,” I said.

Freeze spoke up. “It’s time for the birds to migrate south for the winter,” she punned and I laughed softly. Despite being absolutely retarded and not making much sense other than punning on my nickname, it still made me laugh.

I rolled out from behind the pillar and to that of another. Freeze blasted at the pillar and slowly followed me with the ice beam. “It’s time… to put the icing on the cake!” she shouted out yet another pun.

‘Okay Freeze… now it’s time to fight puns… with puns.’ I swiveled out from behind the pillar and Freeze turned to me in shock. “You know Freeze,” I began and for some reason, she stopped to listen to my Arnie pun that I made up on the spot. “Don’t forget tah bake yer cake,” I said in a perfect Arnie voice stepping my left foot forwards and my right foot back.

I cupped my hands and brought them to my sides, then visualized the technique. ‘Anything you can put your mind to,’ the voice of my mother returned. “KA-MEH!” I yelled out, visualizing how the ball of energy would form. Through the coldness of castle, the ball of energy between my palms felt significantly warm.

Freeze stepped back a few paces, shocked at what was happening. “HA-MEH!” I yelled, tensing up and readying for the blast.

Freeze leveled her cannon at me. “Freeze well!” she punned and fired. At that split second, I shot my hands forwards and with all my might I let out a tremendous yell.

“HAAAAAA!” The shockwave fluttered back my black leather trench coat as the blue energy beam shot forwards from my palms in a destructive blast that collided with Freeze’s own ice beam.

Our beams clashed, energy flashing about at the impact point. Freeze’s ice beam turned to water as it connected, splashing about and only freezing once it touched the ground.

In seconds, my energy wave overtook hers and began to trek towards her. A look of shock came over her face as she gulped. “DISCORD!” She yelled out and I wasn’t really sure what she had meant by it, but the next thing I knew, a block of ice smoked me in the side of the head, knocking my concentration off and allowing Freeze to best me in a split second gap.

The ice beam immediately over took my blast and spewed at me. In the final moment, I tilted my body to the right, her freeze beam skimming off the left side of my face painfully. I screamed in agonizing pain as I fell to the floor.

My hands immediately sprang to my face which felt more like it was burning. Smoke, or maybe it was steam vapours, fumed off my injury. “Uh…ah! Ahhh!” I cried in pain, withering on the ground helplessly.

As I withered, I managed to steal a glance towards my mother, but as I went to apologize, I noticed Discord standing there with another piece of ice in his claws. ‘That traitor!’ I thought angrily, though not vocally as the only things leaving my lips were roars of pain.

Freeze stepped up, cannon in her hooves. “You should know… when you play with ice, you’re gonna get frozen,” she punned. I was about sick of this broad stealing good puns! She went to level the cannon on me but an ear deafening roar boomed in the throne room.

Derreck leapt through the air and delivered a powerful roundhouse kick to her cheek, sending her tumbling back, her freeze cannon going off and splattering the ceiling with ice.

I don’t much remember anything past Derreck heaving me over his shoulder and leaping out the open window of the tall castle… In my final moments, I prayed forgiveness to all those I had failed. ‘I’m sorry Lassie… for not coming back,’ I apologized, tears only flowing from my right eye.

I closed my good eye. ‘I’m sorry mom… I’m so-so sorry… I’ve failed you…’ I wanted to whimper and cry but my world began to fade. It didn’t matter now. Painful and hurtful memories resurfaced in my mind, plaguing my thoughts, ‘Once a fuck up… always a fuck up.’ the voice yelled in my head. I let out an exhale. ‘Maybe things will be better with me dead,’ and those were my final thoughts before my world, everything, went black…

* * *

Derreck’s perspective…

We hurtled down the heights, probably falling at speeds that give one frostbite from the blisteringly cold temperature. With Burdy on my right shoulder, I leaned my body slowly closer to the wall of the castle, and didn’t have to wait long.

As we descended the castle at mindboggling speeds, the castle’s base grew in girth, probably for better support or something. I leaned my left side towards the castle, keeping my injured friend away from the impact that was too come.

With a pain, vivid memories of somepony telling me something resurfaced. ‘Anything you can put your mind to,’ the voice said. I didn’t remember that moment, but it felt like I was there... and I felt confident, and almost knew somehow that it would work.

I felt my forearms shift a little, and it was a bit painful to say the least. With a roar, I clenched my fists. With an agonized roar I forced it out, almost like I was sticking out my tongue.

I felt my wrist bones separate, followed by an excruciating pain that severed itself up my entire arm. With a bout of angered strength, I finished the push. My knuckles spread apart painfully and I let out a howl of pain. The skin between my knuckles split open to give way for the claws that extended out of them.

With a forceful thrust, I jammed the claws into the wall like a cat trying catch itself from a fall. The claws shredded the ice and caught, jerking my arm relentlessly and painfully. Along the way, I had grazed my face against the ice painfully, shredding some of my skin on the left side. I groaned in pain, biting my lower lip to try and even out the pain I was enduring. “That… hurt a lot more than I thought it would!” I hissed to myself.

I began hopping down the castle, descending in short strides, each time catching myself with my new protrusions… goddess, they almost hurt more than they were worth.

I looked down. The final decent to the ground was a good twenty or thirty foot drop. I rolled my eyes, held Burdy to my chest and jumped, putting myself between the ground and his body.

I hit bottom pretty hard but the impact didn’t feel like that of ice. It felt, and sounded, more like the slam of metal. I let out a loud gasp of pain, the wind being knocked from my lungs and several ribs probably cracking.

The driver door opened and Burdy’s dog rushed out. “Oh my goddess! Evan!” She cried out, rushing to the front side of the truck. I slid off but collapsed on the ground, my bone claws retracting. I released my tight grasp on Burdy and let Lassie hold him. There was a lot of blood accommodating the wounds at my knuckles, even as they sealed shut.

“Oh my goddess… oh no, Evan… oh please, say something,” she cried, holding his limp body tight. I looked up to the sky, more so to the top of the tower. At this point, I realized my left eye wasn’t really working. I let out a hush of pain as I closed the damaged eye and looked to the peak of the tower with just my right. I closed my right eye and clunked my head gently into the grill of the battle truck. This… just got a little more difficult…

Author's Note

Okay... sorry for all the cheesy puns but I just had to indulge in my personal Arnold fetish, you guys know me well enough. Anyway, as for the battle truck, what should it be called. I'm letting you as the readers decided. Have a vote or what have you and the most popular one can be her/his name. Think of it as my way of saying thank you for reading this story, even though it isn't really the greatest

Chapter 33

‘The name’s… Burdy…’

Third person, Ponyville,

Friday, May 15th, 2014…

The woman walked along casually through the early morning streets of Ponyville, trying to avoid the watchful eyes of possible law ponies. However, to her utter surprise, there didn’t seem to be any in this town.

She was told this was where the man was. Her heart pounded in her chest as she thought to herself how he could be watching her this very second through a rifle scope, and she wouldn’t even know it.

With a deep swallow she swiftly snuck down an alley between two houses, praying she didn’t look too suspicious. She was wearing her usual getup, cargo pants and a tank top, her handgun holstered at her side for all too see, though most ponies didn’t know what it was and paid it no mind.

She walked back out onto another street, keeping a watchful eye out for the man she was after. “If he’s hunting me… then I’ll just make sure the hunter becomes the hunted,” she muttered to herself, in her mind believing him to be some NATO agent sent out to kill her.

“I wonder if he’s in joint efforts with this world’s special forces?” she asked herself. She knew now she was in a completely different world, but she wondered if perhaps he was working with this world’s elite tactical unit, whatever they were called.

Realizing she had no idea where his home was, she opted to ask a pony. Mingling along in the most casual way she could muster, she paced up to a mobile wagon home that doubled as a stage.

There was a blue mare whose mane and tail were a lighter shade of blue. She wore a magician cape but lacked the hat for the moment as she washed it. “Ahem… uhm… excuse me?” the woman asked, catching Trixie’s attention. “Uhm… do you by chance know a… hairless monkey?” she asked, seeing as how that’s what most ponies addressed her as in the bars before she’d shoot them dead in an outburst of anger.

“Hairless monkey? Well… not to Trixie’s knowledge,” she replied in third person, stunning Kianna.

“Uhm… ahem… hmm… uhm, he… it, is, uhm… it looks like me but bigger and more… masculine,” she stated. Trixie knew in an instant who she meant.

“Well of course Trixie knows Burdy. He is a wonderful man and saved Trixie from her dreaded brother, Tristan! He also saved the entire town from his wrath!” she announced and Kianna rose an eyebrow.

‘I have no idea who Tristan is… but this guy is definitely some kinda special operations agent if he saved an entire town. By the sounds of it, he might even be CIA,’ she thought to herself. “Uhm… right. Do you know where he lives?” she asked curiously.

Trixie nodded. “Of course Trixie knows, Burdy is Trixie’s protector. He lives with Twilight Sparkle in the tree library,” she motioned her hoof at the library not far away. Kianna nodded.

She reached down for her gun. ‘If this guy is protecting her, then maybe she’s part of his team or something,’ she thought to herself. Trixie watched as Kianna reached for the gun. At the last minute however, Kianna moved her hand into her cargo pants’ pocket and retrieved a small pouch of bits, handing it to the mare.

“What’s this for?” Trixie asked curiously, opening the pouch and being surprised to find at least twenty bits.

“I’m uhm… a lawmare, err… well, I’m obviously not a mare but, I work for the law,” she lied through her teeth.

Trixie believed it through and through. “Oh dear… is Burdy in trouble?” she asked worriedly but Kianna shook her head, waving her hand in casual way.

“No-no, not at all. I just need to have a word with him is all,” she replied, relieving Trixie of her worry. ‘She’s probably not part of the team or she would’ve tried to apprehend me already… better not waste a shot and screw up my element of surprise,’ she thought to herself quietly as she gave the mare a modest wave and moved towards the tree library.

Reaching the home, she slowly leaned up against the wall beside the front door. Unveiling her handgun, she cocked back the hammer on the Smith and Wesson 629 performance center revolver.

The six inch barrel was weighted to properly balance the gun out. Kianna fidgeted her hands a bit on the synthetic black grips of the revolver, believing it to be a little too large and uncomfortable to be a combat weapon, but alas, this time she wanted something that’d down him first hit.

She spun out and kicked open the door, swinging the revolver from side to side as she did a visual scan and checked her blind spots. Satisfied, she entered the home in haste. Quickly moving from room to room she cleared the house in under a minute’s time, but was shocked to find it empty. A shiver went down her spin. “Maybe he knew I was coming!” she gasped and shivered a little more violently as she pondered the thought of whether or not he had booby-trapped the building.

Looking around, she noticed the place was an absolute pig’s sty. Food dishes were left out and flies were landing on the plates. Mice dumpling were everywhere on the living room floor, hinting that perhaps at one point there was food left out.

She looked around further. “What kinda fucking library is this?” she asked aloud to nopony in particular. De-cocking the hammer on her revolver, she opted that perhaps he had known she was coming, maybe a scout had saw her approaching the town. “Fuck… this guy’s probably got a whole goddamn team…” she trailed off and left the premises…

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…

I awoke peacefully, a warm embrace of light beaming down on me. As my eyes opened and they adjusted, the whole room seemed to be fogged in a holy aura of light. As I stood up, I was expecting to find myself a little dazed but instead found myself perfectly fine.

I stood up with a stretch and a yawn. There was this feeling… a feeling of… serenity I guess. I looked around. The room looked rather basic. Just a bed, a nightstand, a closet and a window. I tried to look out the window but all I could see was a fog of golden clouds, a warm fog of basking holy light hazing over them.

“Uhh…” I groaned, rubbing my eyes as I walked towards the door.

“Good morning sweetie,” came an all too familiar voice. I spun, only to see my mother sitting on the side of my bed.

“M-mo-mom?” I gasped. How’d she get here without me knowing? She hopped off the bed and onto all fours.

“Yes honey?” she asked, reaching me and hopping to her hind legs so she could plant a kiss on my cheek.

I snuggled into her warm embrace and sighed. “I love you,” I whispered and she leaned back. I felt a little cold for some reason and tried to snuggle a little closer into her but it didn’t really work.

She leaned away from me. “Do you really?” she asked and I felt a shiver rattle my spin as I felt even colder. I nodded but things seemed to get even colder as the bright holy light died out and was replaced by a luminous darkness.

My mother spoke again. “Well if you love me so much, why did you fail me?” she asked and I felt my heart sink a little.

“Wh-what?” I stuttered and she stepped back, my world feeling even darker. Her eyes changed to a dark purple, almost black.

“You left me for dead! You screwed up and now all of Equestria is doomed because of you. I needed you, and you let me down. I'm ashamed to have you as my son,” she said in a voice not of her own… it sounded vaguely familiar and I know I’d heard that voice before…

“M-mom… I… I tried my best,” I whimpered. The walls on the room cracked and shatter apart. A hail of cold rain blasted me, chilling me to the bone.

“Well your best wasn’t good enough, now was it?” she said angrily and I fell to my knees.

“Pl-please… mom, forgive me, I tried!” I cried, tears flowing from my eyes.

“You’re a disgrace of a child and a failure to me!” she yelled. I swear I could pin-point that voice…

I grovelled up to her but she simply turned her head away. The rain pouring down on me was chilling. I tried to pull her into a hug, still on my knees but she simply pushed me away. My heart was breaking.

‘No god… please… don’t let this be,’ I prayed to myself, my heart sinking and my world going black…

* * *

I awoke with a scream, icy cold water chilling my body and immediately waking me to my full attention. “GAH!” I screamed, scrambling away from the stream of water, only to find another blasting me from a different angel. I squirmed around on what felt like smooth tile flooring. The water was pooling a bit and was almost colder than the water. I frolicked on the ground, my vision a complete blur.

Cold water poured down on me from what I believed to be all sides. I scrambled towards where the floor felt like it took a dip, and escaped the cold rain, only to find myself in an equally cold puddle that felt as if it were draining.

I blinked several times, wiping my eyes to try and clear my vision. However, despite my efforts, I found that the complete left side of my vision was an aquatic blur, as if I was deep under water.

I tried to clear my eye but it did no good, and my vision was still poor. I closed my left eye and found it better to see with that eye closed. Things immediately cleared to perfection as my right eye adjusted to the dim lighting.

I was in some kinda shower room… like one that would be in a change room. “He’s up,” said a familiar masculine voice, followed by a shocked gasp.

I spun in the puddle to see Derreck standing by Lassie, the latter of whom appeared to have just gotten up. “Huh? Oh right…" she trailed off from her sudden shock then looked over to me. "Evan!” She gasped, rushing over to me and taking me into an embracing hug before shivering.

“Damn… sorry about the cold water… I think you ran out of warm water about an hour ago,” she mentioned. Derreck paced over. The left side of his face was beat up a little, scratched I think.

“Winterized pipes,” he punned and I just snickered.

Lassie squeezed me tighter. “Oh my goddess… I thought I had lost you,” she whispered, then shivered again. “Come on, let’s get the hell outta this puddle,” she commented and I followed her out of the shower room, leaving the nozzles on, figuring that’d be the least of anypony’s problems.

I tried to open my left eye again, only to find the same results: a blur. I closed my eye again with a sigh. Derreck pulled out an eye patch made of black leather and handed it to me. I slipped it on. I will admit, it felt weird at first, not having the use of my left eye. My vision was way different and I had no peripheral vision on my left side whatsoever.

Derreck slipped a similar eye patch on his left eye. “I damaged my eye falling off the castle…” he muttered. My dream came back to haunt me and I shivered. I had failed… dismally at that. Memories of our battle with Freeze resurfaced and I remembered who the snake in the grass was.

“Discord!” I snarled and Lassie nodded.

“Yeah… he’s a little… tied up in class right now,” she commented and led me over to the corner of the cold change room. Funny, I had once considered the running water cold, but the rest of the place seemed colder, making me skip along to keep my bare feet off the cold ground.

Lassie had our clothes laid out and a towel for each of us. Derreck and I quickly dried up and slipped on our clothes which at first were just as cold as the rest of the place, but soon warmed up due to our body heat. I hugged myself and rubbed my hands against the opposite forearm o create friction heat. "Damn it's cold," I muttered.

Lassie stood up to her hindlegs and examined my face, specifically my left side. “Damn… I really wish we had gotten a picture of you before you messed up your eye… you look old,” she commented and I just shrugged.

“Just because I have an eye patch doesn’t make me look old,” I stated but she handed me a mirror. I looked, only to be astonished that the sides of my hair had really started to grey, badly. My facial features didn’t look all that different other than the eye patch.

“Damn…” I trailed off. I had grey hair beforehand but only a little and it wasn’t really noticeable unless I let my hair grow more than two inches, and was only at the very sides of my hair. This ran along the complete side of my hairline, right to the back.

Derreck spoke up. “So what about Discord?” He asked and Lassie led us out into a hallway.

“This place looks like a school or something,” I commented, seeing a bunch of doors labelled with what course the room taught. Lassie nodded and spoke briefly to answer my suspicion.

“It is… or was, a high school. I guess Freeze didn’t take it as that much of a threat, and didn’t freeze it completely. There’s only two frozen ponies in this place that I could find, and I think one was the principal,” she commented.

Derreck spoke up. “The other?” he asked.

“Janitor,” she replied, pointing down the hall at a pony with a janitor cart full of frozen mops and cleaning materials. She led us into the science lab where Discord was chained down to a chair.

“How doesn’t he escape?” I asked and Lassie spun a pair of hoofcuffs in her paw.

“Magic resistant. He can’t escape the chains, trust me, he’s tried already,” she commented then snickered and tossed me the hoofcuffs. “You could do some crazy bondage with some of the stuff in here,” she mentioned in a sexual tone.

It made me wonder why exactly there was hoofcuffs in a science lab in a high school. We reached Discord and I noticed he had a lot of scratches and bruises, probably from Lassie beating him because of what he had done. “Ahh… Burdy, so glad to see you’re alr-“ I cut him off with a fist to the face that knocked his chair back.

He groaned then muttered. “Okay… I deserved that, fair enough.” I pulled his chair back upright.

“My friend’s call me Burdy,” I stated, holding him upright with my left. I hammered a sucker punch to his gut with my right, knocking the wind out of him. “You call me Burdick,” I told him and he gasped for air.

“Pl… plea,” he kept trying to suck air and I stepped back. Derreck’s bone claws extended and I winced as I saw how brutally vicious it was when they spread his wrist and knuckle bones apart to come out. It made me cringe just from the sight, forcing me to caress my own wrists.

“I say we gut the bastard right here then kill off Freeze,” Derreck stated. My dream resurfacing and building the fury in my heart, I nodded.

“Yeah… I’d say that’d be acceptable,” I agreed sadistically.

“Wait… just wait,” Discord pleaded and Derreck brought the bone claw tips up to his chin, forcing him to lift his head high to avoid getting sliced.

“Oh… last words?” Derreck asked snidely.

Discord gulped feverishly. “It… it was for Fluttershy,” he stated and Derreck lowered the claws slightly.

“You’ve got five seconds to get me interested, or I’ll make your death even more painful than originally planned for wasting my time,” he stated and Discord quickly began.

“You can’t kill Freeze,” he stated. Derreck spoke up.

“Three seconds,” he stated.

“Wellyoucankillherbuttheneveryponywilldie!” He sputtered out.

Derreck raised an eyebrow. “How many seconds was that?” he asked. Lassie and I both shrugged, having not kept track of the time. He turned back to Discord. “Say that again, but in further detail.

“Yes, you’re right… you can technically kill her, probably easily if you planned it out… but if you do, her magic will disperse,” he stated and Derreck shrugged.

“So won’t everypony just return to normal then?” He asked but Discord shook his head.

“No, the ice and water will remain. Her magic doesn’t allow her to simply create water and ice out of thin air, she simply freezes it. That cannon of hers holds water vapours that she turns to ice. That’s why it’d take weeks, probably months, for her to freeze a city like Baltimare on her own. She’d have to carry around jugs of water. That cannon has an internal heater that keeps the water heated in vapors, so that her capacity for ice is larger, and lighter,” he stated.

I groaned. “Okay… so what are you getting at?” I asked.

“If you kill her, the ice will remain. Eventually the storm clouds will disperse and Celestia’s sun will beat down on the city and start to thaw things out,” he stated. Derreck Lassie and I all shrugged and said the same thing in unison.

“So?”

“Have you ever put an ice cube in warm water?” he asked and we all nodded. “What happened?” he asked and Lassie answered.

“It melted,” she replied and he rolled his eyes.

“I meant… it cracked due to the thermal shock of slow thawing… now imagine what would happen to a pony that was frozen…” he stated and the three of us sighed while dipping our heads. Derreck brought his claws closer to Discord once again.

“Okay bub… so why did you stab us in the back?” he asked aggressively.

“I told you already, for Fluttershy,” he stated and Derreck brought his claws even closer. Discord swallowed. “Freeze can use her magic to unthaw things in an almost instantaneous moment, skipping the thermal shock… so I made a deal with her. I bring you to her alive, and she releases Fluttershy,” he stated and I tilted my head with an annoyed look.

“Well… you brought us to her, so where’s Fluttershy?” I asked and he shook his head.

“Well… we didn’t quite capture you, so she didn’t release her yet,” he replied.

“And you’re still willing to believe that after it’s done, she’ll release Fluttershy?” I asked and Discord shrugged.

“Some chance is better than no chance,” he told us. Derreck retracted his claws, the wounds between his knuckles healing up. It just made me shiver from the look of it. Even his knuckles and wrist bones returned to normal.

“So whatta we do?” Derreck asked.

“Dunno… if we kill her, then everypony dies from being split in half,” I stated but Discord spoke up.

“Well, some might not be cracked. They’d just die of hypothermia,” he spoke up and we all glared at him.

“That’s not reassuring,” I snarled and he immediately became silent once again.

Lassie spoke up. “So how do we know they’re alive anyways? I mean, they’re all frozen ice cubes for Celestia’s sake,” she mentioned, bringing up a new topic that Discord quickly answered.

“Well indeed, however much like a cockatrice’s magic to turn a pony to stone, her magic perfectly preserves a pony in ice, so if they were to be somehow resurrected, they would be as they were before,” he stated and I pointed to my bad eye.

“So what about this?” I asked.

“You were thawed out too slowly. In fact you’re lucky to even be alive. You see, when you face was frozen, the ice froze deep, almost to your brain,” he commented and Derreck snickered out a pun.

“Brain freeze.”

Discord didn’t pay him any mind. “When you were thawed, the ice melted but due to your healing factor, the water in your eye remained trapped. Namely in your eye’s anterior chamber… hence the reason it probably seems like you’re trying to see underwater when you have that eye open,” he mentioned.

“What about the rest of the ice that would’ve thawed in my body?” I asked.
“Probably evacuated through your body pours from your healing factor or your body diluted it, difficult to say really,” he stated. “And that is why you cannot kill Freeze… there needs to be an instantaneous thaw to avoid everything,” he said. I groaned and flopped my head into my hands.

“But… even with the instant thaw, wouldn’t Fluttershy’s eyes be damaged just like mine?” I asked but Discord shook his head. That didn’t even make sense but fuck it, half the things that happened in this world didn’t make sense to begin with.

I groaned and flopped down in what I presumed to be the teacher’s chair. “What the hell are we going to do?” I sighed.

Lassie barked to catch our attention… heh… funny, her barking was almost as strange to me now, as when she started talking. “IDEA!” She said aloud in a voice that mimicked Rarity’s. We all turned to her.

“Okay, so here’s what we’re going to do,” she said, pulling up a projector. She tried to pull down the projector screen but was a little too short. “Uhm… a little help here?” she asked. I walked over and tugged down the projector screen.

She flicked on the projector and slipped on a slide that showed a tombstone that read ‘R.I.P. Freeze’. “First, we kill off Freeze,” she stated and Discord went to intervene. “Shut the hell up! It’s my turn to talk!” She yelled angrily and we all kept quiet. She put on another slide. This one showed a little stick figure that looked like Discord above the water.

“THEN! Discord, if you’d be so kind and not stab us in the fucking back again,” she said, turning to Discord who simply nodded in response. “You’ll create a typhoon of super-hot water, but try to make it not really super-hot, just super-hot enough that it’d instantly thaw a block of ice,” she commented.

“Then!” she slipped on a new slide, showing a giant tornado looking thing hitting the city with a magnifying glass amplifying the sun rays, “Discord, you’ll wash the hot typhoon right through the city while using your magic to amplify the sun rays to keep it hot, and it’ll thaw everything instantaneously, skipping the thermal shock!” she announced, knocking over the projector while she flailed her forelegs into the air with a cheer.

The projector smashed on the ground and we all simply looked to her. I blinked. “Uhm… where’d you think of that?” I asked curiously, probably asking what was on everyone’s mind. She shrugged vicariously.

“I saw it on a movie once… except for the magnifying glass part. I knew if the typhoon was out of the water for too long, it’d get cold,” she mentioned.
Discord spoke up. “That’s crazy. That’d never work, the water would have to be boiling... probably steaming hot... are you out of your goddess damned minds?” he gasped and Derreck rose an eyebrow while looking to him.

“Some chance is better than no chance right?” he replied, much to Discord’s frustration. I thought about what Discord said… he was right, this was a bit on the crazy side, but it was the best we had.

“I uhh… I just have to do something first…”

* * *

Third person, Freeze’s super-secret hideout…

Discord slithered into the main throne room where Freeze sat idle on her throne. “Bring me good news draconequus,” she said gently, swishing around her slushy alcohol.

“He’s going to a church to pray. He’s slightly injured, his left eye is damaged and no longer works,” he informed the cold mare. She took a sip of her drink then set I down before standing up slowly.

She held her hoof to her chest and let out a faint exhale. “That man…” she trailed off and loosened her robe, revealing many scars from bullet wounds. “His weapons left me weak… and nearly killed me. His one shot just grazed my heart. If the battle had’ve heated up further, I would’ve probably melted,” she punned terribly. Discord simply nodded as Freeze grabbed her battle suit. “I have made some modifications to my armor,” she commented, slipping into her thicker suit.

Discord watched as she grabbed the cannon, now larger and more rigid looking. Her armor was largely refurbished, sporting larger plates of ice. “It is heavier and severely hinders my mobility… but is thick enough to stop enough of his shots to allow me to freeze him,” she commented. “If I had’ve made it any thicker, I wouldn't be able to even jog,” she commented and Discord nodded.

“Why are you telling me this?” he asked curiously.

“So you know you joined the right side…” she trailed off and leaned closer to him. “And so you don’t get any second thoughtssssss,” she hissed out the last letter, spraying his ear with a faint mist of ice.

He lept back and rubbed his ear attentively. Freeze stepped forwards and huffed on his ear, thawing it just as quickly as it had been frozen. “Now go, I’ll be along shortly,” she ordered.

* * *

Baltimare church…

In the main cathedral, a man knelt before a giant cross, his hands cupped together in front of him as he prayed to his lord. His damaged eye covered by an eye patch and his right eye closed, he made no observations of the building as he prayed in silence and in peace.

The door swung open and four heavy ice boots clunked into the room, the clunking echoing for all to hear. The man simply continued to pray. Cannon strapped to her side, Freeze continued along, a little curious as to why he hadn’t swung around to face her. She gritted her teeth, believing that perhaps he didn’t perceive her a large enough threat to pay her any mind.

Freeze stopped a few yards away from the man, whom finally opened his remaining good eye. “Have you come to repent?” he asked, with little expression in his voice.

Freeze lowered her brow slightly as she stood to her hindlegs and readied her freeze cannon. “I am here… to send you to your doom… where you will freeze in hell,” she stated. The man looked up to the holy cross before him, which was decorated with icicles.

“I suppose anything is possible to those who believe it to be so,” he commented back. He slowly stood up and turned to face her. The inside barrel of the freeze cannon began to glow while swirls of energy became ever present in the weapon.

In a window high above that looked down upon the cathedral floor, a larger man peered down, the sights on his SVT-40 lined up with Freeze. In the last moment, the gunshot echoed in the church, and the bullet slammed into Freeze’s side.

Her body shook and she was spun slightly to the left. Derreck fired again, slamming her in the back with a 185g full metal jacket round. The armor, much like Freeze had built it to do, stopped the round. Derreck fired three more rounds in quick succession all striking her in the back and tumbling her forwards and over a row of benches.

“WHAT?! HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE?!” She gasped, looking up to see the man. She ducked just as a bullet chipped away at the bench seat in front of her face. She slowly rolled to the side then stood up and fired a freeze blast at the windowsill.

Derreck swivelled away from the opening as it was continuously blasted. From the entrance of the building, a rifle was hefted up by a pair of paws. The sights of the SKS, nicknamed Applebloom, lined up with freeze. The first shot cracked off and took Freeze by the side and made her flinch from the pain of the impact, despite it not actually penetrating.

She turned to see the canine standing on her hindlegs, rifle in her forepaws. Firing three more consecutive shots, she hammered two shots into Freeze’s chest, the third clipping the shoulder pauldron of her armor.

Freeze turned her freeze blast towards the canine who immediately rolled out of the way. Now focusing on the pooch, Derreck again took several pot-shots on the mare. Mean full-sized rifle shots hammered her, staggering her to one side.

Turning her attention back to Derreck, she fired again. The man on the ground floor had already taken cover behind the cross, avoiding the conflict. Derreck’s rifle ran dry and he rolled to the side just as a freeze blast struck the window he was at.

He slipped another magazine into the gun and pulled back on the bolt, then let the receiver slam shut. Down below, Lassie used Derreck’s distraction as a chance to pop off more shots at Freeze.

Her rifle too ran dry and she was forced into cover as she reloaded as fast as she could manage. Freeze turned back to where the canine had fired at her from. “Bitch,” she swore loudly, though truthfully addressing her namesake as a female dog.

“Her name! Is Lassie!” Yelled Derreck from up high, again returning fire on Freeze. Her armor began to crack under the constant stress of being struck by armor piercing rounds.

She once again turned to Derreck and fired, but he had again rolled away. Lassie stood up and fired viciously, even aiming high on her last two shots, one bullet clipping Freeze’s ice helmet which shattered on the left side, revealing part of her face.

Freeze staggered to turn back to the dog and fired, but Lassie rolled quickly, dodging the ice blast. Derreck gripped a rope that was attached to the ceiling of the building, something he had done prior to the fight.

He gripped it tight, wrapping the rope several times around his left forearm. No Name in his right hand, he hopped through the windowsill and swung down in a long arc. Without aiming, he fired from the hip. Shots plinked off the ground, only two shots hitting Freeze.

As Derreck finished his swing, he set foot on the windowsill of the opposite side of the church from which he had started from. Turning back, he saw Freeze turn to him. Burdy grabbed the rope while Derreck reloaded. With his M590A1 in hand, Burdy swung down in a similar fashion Derreck had. As he reached the bottom of his swing arc, he fired a blast of 000buckshot into Freeze, but only got one shot off due to the pump action on his shotgun.

Freeze was kicked back from the blast, but rather than follow him with her gaze, she looked to the giant cross with astonishment. There, hid a second Burdy. “How… how the hell is this possible?!” she screamed and the body near the cross shape-shifted back into its true form, Discord’s form.

Her eyes went wide as she stood up staggeringly. “FREEZE IN HELL DISCORD!” She yelled, ready to freeze the draconequus. Just as she was about to blast him, Burdy swung back down and blasted her again, again knocking her to the ground. Her armor cracked apart, having attained far too much stress from the firefight.

Burdy swung back up to where Derreck was. Handing him the rope, Derreck slung No Name across his back then grabbed Burdy with his free arm. The duo swung down together and dropped near the bottom of the swing.

Sliding across the slippery ground, Burdy slung Nightshade across his back and reached for his leg holster. Derreck unslung No Name and readied her for action. Lassie readied her rifle.

Freeze stood up and looked around in a daze. Burdy let out a roar of anger, face wrinkled from his furious expression. The sonic boom of the bullets from Belladonna flashed a brilliant circular muzzle flash every time he triggered a round.
The heavy 300g bullets tore into Freeze, blood oozing from the tremendous exit wounds. Her cold healing abilities tried to kick in, but as Lassie began to chip in with her rifle, Freeze’s healing abilities were strained beyond their limits. With the last shot in the magazine, Burdy targeted the freeze cannon and fired. The jacketed slug slammed into the cannon and it erupted in a hot fume of water vapors. Freeze let out a pained scream as she stumbled from the eruption.

Derreck finalized the assault with his SVT-40, pumping shots right through her with the full-sized semi-automatic WWII rifle. Freeze collapsed on the floor, blood spilling out of her as her body’s advanced cooling heal ability tried to kick into effect. Her helmet slipped off as she dragged herself across the ground.

Derreck, Lassie and Burdy all began walking towards her…

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…

Discord joined us, Violet in his claws. Discord stepped in front of us, still facing Freeze as she staggered to her hooves. “This is your only chance Freeze, release this city from your cold grip, or else!” He ordered and Freeze simply laughed, spitting blood on the floor that immediately froze solid.

“You think your threats send shivers down my spine?” she punned. I wanted to laugh but this was serious. “You know as well as I do I’m the only one that can save your beloved Fluttershy,” she commented and Discord was slightly hesitant, I could tell by how he went a little rigid.

“Th-that doesn’t matter anymore. We have a plan,” he stated and Freeze simply laughed hysterically as she studied herself.

“You think, even if you manage to save them, that the world will just accept you? You know as well as I do that they’ll just blame you for it,” she said and Discord didn’t answer back.

“Tell me Discord… how many times has Rainbow Dash and the others accused you of something without evidence to support it? They simply say it was you just because you’re you… because once evil, always evil,” she stated in a feminine Austrian accent. Damn this chick for stealing a bunch of good one-liners.

Discord stood, an eerie silence filling the space between all of us. He racked the pump on Violet. “You’re right,” he said then turned to us, shotgun leveled at me. “I am evil.”

“UGH!” I gasped, trying to raise my handgun in time. It was no use, he had gotten the drop on us. Without warning however, he quickly spun, shotgun held only in his right lion paw and muzzle just inches from Freeze's head.

He blasted off a shot that blew away Freeze’s head in a mist of cold blood and brain matter. “Just not you’re kind of evil,” he remarked. My jaw dropped in awe. I walked up beside him, the barrel of his, err, my shotgun, still smoking. He dropped it to the ground with a sigh.

“That… was a wicked one-liner,” I told him with a pat on the shoulder.

He shook his head. “I… I don’t know how you do it… killing… taking one’s life. It’s traumatizing,” he said softly, looking down at Freeze’s deceased body.

I pointed out the door. “Hey, we can reconcile later. Right now, you gotta get out there and do your thing,” I told him. He immediately nodded and flew off. Lassie stood up beside me as I slung yet another shotgun across my back.

“You think he was contemplating it? Turning on us again?” She asked and Derreck spoke up before I could.

“Yep… but I understand now why he did it…” he trailed off and we all nodded. We all knew really. His bond with Fluttershy pushed him to do things he might not usually do. “But I guess he saw the light,” Derreck finished.

We all stepped outside and saw a huge typhoon flashing towards us. “Better hold your breath,” I muttered. Just as it neared, my right eye clenched shut and my body tensed.

The impact was pretty heavy and tossed my body across the ground. The water was extremely hot, almost enough to burn me severely, but as quickly as it hit me, it left. I felt my body flushing through the now warm water. After a few seconds, I felt my body washing up against the stairs of the church.

As I opened up my eye, I looked up to see the sunny sky. In the beautiful clouds, I swear I could see a cloud that looked like Twilight smiling down at me. I laid my head back with a sigh and lifted the eye patch slightly and looked, only to find my vision still an absolute blur. I rolled my good eye and put the eye patch back on.

My clothes were soaked… actually, there was still at least eight inches of water on the ground… maybe a twelve… but at least it was warm water. I rolled onto my side then stood up, along with Derreck and Lassie. We all looked to the bright summer sky a sparkling spew of rainbow dust following the draconequus as he flew through the air.

Derreck stretched his arms out to the side and basked in the warm sunlight. “Damn… that feels good,” he said. Lassie stood between us then shook like a dog, water splashing at us.

We just blinked and both looked down at her. She looked back up at us. “What?” She asked innocently, before a smirk crossed her face. Derreck and I heaved her up between us, carrying her in a way that would look like something from a family portrait.

I looked over to a pony whom had a camera. “Hey buddy, can you take a picture of us?” I asked and he looked over with a stunned look. Everypony was a little shocked and unsure about what was going on. He lifted his camera but before he took the picture I stopped him. “Wait… hold on a second,” I ordered.

Seconds later, Discord returned and stood behind us in the middle. “Okay bub, take the picture,” I said. He flashed the picture and waited a moment for the old style camera to spit the photo out. He gave us the picture and after a few moments, the picture developed, rather well too.

We looked like… a dysfunctional family. Two grown men, a talking dog and a dragon goat. I looked to them, “Well guys, we better get outta here before someone realizes who we are…”

* * *

Hours later...

I sat in the driver seat of the battle truck. Derreck was in the back cleaning and drying the firearms. Lassie stood up and came over. “Hey, so listen,” she said, rubbing the dash in an affectionate way. “When you were out, I was thinking about what you said,” she said, trailing her index paw digit across the dashboard, towards me.

“About what?” I asked, paying her actions no mind.

“The truck,” she said sensually, trailing her index paw digit down onto the steering wheel.

“What about it?” I asked. She stopped her paw on top of my hand and gave it an affectionate rub.

“Well, I was thinking… maybe we should name it Juggernaut,” she opted. I rose an eyebrow with a warm smile.

“Oh really? Why that?” I asked.

“Well I dunno. I thought about maybe naming it just Truck, but Juggernaut really suits it well,” she said and I chuckled.

“Okay… Juggernaut she is,” I said and Lassie leaned back.

“Hey!” She gasped and I looked to her.

“Hey what?” I asked back.

“Why does it have to be a she?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Well… I dunno… just because,” I replied. “Cadence is a she, so why not?” I said and Lassie spoke again.

“What, is Cadence a lesbian?” She asked and I was taken aback by her comment. “Seriously, this truck should totally be a dude, then your two trucks could get married and have little truck babies,” she joked and I just laughed.

“Okay-okay-okay… just go sit back down would yah?” I laughed and she gave me a dog kiss to the cheek. I looked up to the sun visor where I had pinned the photo of us. I looked back to them and a warm feeling entered my body.

Discord stepped into the front cabin, sitting down in the passenger seat. “Listen… I’m really sorry Burdick I-“ but I cut him off.

“The name’s… Burdy,” I told him and he rose an eyebrow.

“I thought only your friends called you Burdy?” he asked and I looked to him with a sly Arnie smile. He nodded with a slight smile. “Thank you… I’ve… been meaning to apologize… for what I did. It wasn’t right… and was really stupid,” he said and I just laughed.

“I understand why you did it… as long as you learned something from it, then I say let bygones be bygones” I replied and he blinked.

“Just… just like that?” he asked and I nodded before motioning back to Derreck.

“Just don’t ask him for forgiveness… he’s a little rough,” I laughed quietly. He nodded.

“I am truly sorry, I-“ but I cut him off by putting a CD into the player of the truck. Derreck and Lassie looked up to the speakers in the back. I just shook my head. Inside, this thing really didn’t feel like a combat vehicle.

A musical base started and Discord looked to me. I nodded with a slight smile. “Just listen to this song and you’ll understand what I’m talking about… though you might only be able to understand the last three things he says,” I joked. This was such an awful song in my opinion… well maybe not awful, just goofy, but it kinda fit our situation.

I bobbed my head to the musical notes, ignoring the lyrics since I couldn’t understand much of what Sting was saying. As we puttered along back to Ponyville, I pulled out a piece of paper and pencil then used my knees to drive through the open fields while I constructed a note to Twilight.

Dear Princess Sparkle,

I learned, or perhaps a friend of mine learned, that even though friendship can be a wonderful thing, it can also be the fall of one’s actions. One must understand that sometimes the right decision is not the easiest made, and sometimes a decision is very difficult thing to make. Sometimes it can feel like it’s a choice between one you love, or the lives of many, and the decision is not an easy one to make because either way you feel bad. You might make a bad choice, or a selfish one, but as long as you learn from that mistake and do the right thing, the sun will shine in the end. And afterwards… stanum buhmah cunada, aluhmahplovam, we’re startin’ up a brand new day!

Yours truly,
Burdy

Chapter 34

‘I am petrified from the very thought of school…’

Baltimare, third person,

Saturday, May 16th, 2014…

Rainbow Dash stomped her hoof down then flinched in slight pain. “And I say we gotta leave now!” she barked an order at the conductor. He shook his head.

“Sorry ma’am… the railway is all backed up, ponies trying to leave and enter the city, it’s a mess,” he replied.

Rainbow Dash stormed off, her friends following her in haste. Fluttershy peeped up in her usual timid voice. “Oh Dashie, I’m sure it will be okay,” she tried to assure her friend.

“No it won’t be, not unless I get home right away!” Rainbow Dash said aloud and tried to take flight. Her right wing however, spasmed in pain and she crashed to the ground not five feet away. She bit her lip hard, trying to suppress the pain of her wing that she had broke in her fight with Freeze.

Applejack trotted up to her friend’s side. “Now jus’ calm down sugar-cube, er yah’ll gonna hurt yerself worse,” she told the other mare.

“But I have to get back… I have to! I promised Scootaloo I’d be there! AJ, you’re the element of honesty, you know what a promise means!” She turned to Twilight. “Twilight, cast a teleportation spell or something, get us home to Ponyville,” she opted but Twilight just shook her head in defeat.

“I’m sorry Dash but… I can’t possibly teleport us that far, I’d be exhausting and I don’t even know if we get that far,” she replied. Dash just collapsed with her hooves over her head, biting her lip in distress.

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…

The teacher stood at the front of the classroom, writing things down on the blackboard with orange chalk. Derreck leaned over and whispered to me, “Aren’t the supposed to use white fucking chalk on a black board?”

I let out a remorseful sigh and dipped my head into my left hand as a headache pounded inside my skull, thumping against all sides. The whole room seemed to have a red haze to it that didn’t help my hammering headache in any way.

Sweat rolled down my face and I found it overly difficult to concentrate on what the teacher was blabbering on about. Something about the angles of a triangle that… oh fuck it, I’d never need this shit in real life anyway. I wasn’t planning on becoming a rocket scientist.

The teacher turned around. “And that concludes today’s lesson. Your homework is pages eighty-four to ninety, all questions. You have the remainder of the period to get started,” she informed the class. I flumped my head into the desk, resulting in a loud ‘THUMP!’ that echoed throughout the otherwise quiet classroom.

The class however didn’t seem to notice, as this was one of my general reactions to homework. I decided to perhaps at least look at the questions, maybe it wasn’t that bad. I opened the textbook to page eighty-six… there was like… seven numbers, and each number had like five questions about a goddamned triangle that was so fucking useless and had…

I calmed myself. If I got any angrier I’d have an aneurysm or something. I groaned and squirmed in my seat. There was no possible way I’d get this done. How the hell did I end up here anyway? Wasn’t I done school? I was, I had passed with academic grades and everything… so why was I back here?

I began to panic. More sweat began to pour down my face. I started getting the jitters… shivers rattling my spine. I gasped for air…

* * *

Monday, May 18th, 2014…

I jolted awake with a wheeze for air, my vision a blur. I grasped at my face, looking around feverishly… I was at home… the library… “Oh thank goddess…” I whispered in relief. For the first time ever really… I was truly, heart and soul, happy that I was in Equestria and not back on Earth. If I woke up and I was in my own bed I’d have a panic, thinking perhaps my dream actually happened and I had forgotten to do my homework…

In seconds I realized that I had been sweating heavily, and my bed sheets were soaked and disheveled. There was also a slight wet mark in my mattress. I calmed my shaky breathing to a regular pace and stood up.

Another few seconds past and I realized it reeked of sweat and body odour. At least it didn’t smell as bad as when we got back. When we had arrived back home Saturday night… technically it was Sunday morning but it like three minutes after midnight so…

The library was still a mess like we had left it, but the food that was left out had started to go bad, namely the eggs, along with some of the other trash Lassie and Discord left out. On top of that, I had dropped Discord off at Fluttershy’s cabin so he could tend to the animals so that left only Lassie Derreck and I to clean the mess.

Between Lassie, Derreck and myself, it took us the entirety of Sunday to clean the house and make it smell decent again. My vision still blurry, I realized I’d need to put my eye patch back on.

I slipped on both my holy cross necklace and the leather eye patch, then took a look at my watch, which read ‘0458’. I rolled my eyes. It was a little on the early side considering I hadn’t gotten to bed until nearly midnight last night but…

I stood up and grabbed my bed sheets. Puttering up the stairs, I began mumbling a tune to myself, but it was mostly garbled and mismatched tunes. As I reached the living room, I noticed that Derreck was no longer sleeping on the couch, in fact he wasn’t even home anymore. “He musta left last night… this morning,” I corrected myself tiredly.

I moseyed on into the washroom and tossed my bed sheets into a hamper. I’d have to make a note to do some laundry today. A thought crossed my mind. I could do it the old fashion way, wash it in a basin of water then leave it out to dry.

I quickly set aside the thought, remembering how nice it was to have bed sheets that had been dried with fabric softener. I left the door to the washroom open, since there was nopony else home to keep myself private from, and slipped off my undies before playing around with the bathtub taps. I would've taken a shower, but right now a pony sized shower was way too small and inconvenient for my liking.

I finally found the perfect temperature and plugged the tub to let it fill. As I waited, I ended up looking over to the shelf and saw bubble bath maker. I smiled faintly. I’d treat myself. I squirted some of the soapy substance into the bath and stirred it around. Bubbles formulated and made the surface of the water all foamy and fun looking, just like the cover on the bottle.

With the tub nearly filled, I shut off the water, slipped off my eye patch and necklace then set them aside. Very carefully, I slid into the small bathtub. As the warm water embraced my body, I let out a satisfied exhale. I lowered my body and washed water through my hair which was getting to be a little long… and as of a few days ago, grey along the sides.

I let the warm embrace take me away as I felt my mind slipping off into unconsciousness. I was pretty tired. However, before I could totally fall asleep, a cheer boomed in the home that jolted me awake.

Before I could say anything however, a body jumped into the tub. “BUBBLES!” Screamed the all too familiar voice of my erratic canine companion. I just groaned as Lassie splashed around in the already confined tub.

“Lassie…” I grumbled. She stopped and looked to me.

“What?” she asked innocently. I pointed over the tub sides, where puddles of water resided from her goofing around. “So?” she replied and I just groaned.

“I was having a nice relaxing bath… and besides, what are you doing up at five in the morning?” I asked and she shrugged.

“You woke me up talking in your sleep. Something about White fucking chalk?” she informed me. I just exhaled in a rather annoyed way.

“So you just HAD to wait for me to make a nice warm bath, get comfortable, then jump in and make a mess?” I asked in a ticked off voice. She nodded then flicked water at me.

“Of course. No better way to get you up. Besides, I need a bath,” she said as she began walking circles inside the tube, her long, wet, droopy tail sloshing water over the sides of the tub.

“I’ll take you to the lake later,” I told her and she just scoffed.

“Actually, that won’t do. You see, I’m an English Rough Collie,” she stated and I just blinked. “In case you didn’t know… and I just found out, English Rough Collie’s need to be washed and tended to constantly to avoid them getting matted fur… whatever that is,” Lassie informed me.

She turned around and plopped her rump right into my lap. “So how’s bout it owner. Care to pedicure and pamper your pet that you ohhh so love and cherish,” she said in a cheeky voice.

I sighed. “Fine… but you’re cleaning the floors.”

She huffed then nodded. “Fine, but this better be one good goddess damned pedicure… I don’t even know what a pedicure is, I just read it in a book,” she mentioned. I just began scrubbing her fur, making sure to get deep and right to the skin.

I hoped that her loose fur that came out wouldn’t plug the drain but if it did, I’d just make Lassie clean that too. As I began washing up higher, namely around the back of her ears, she’d grunt and huff happily.

Her rump would twitch and grind against my lap which… kinda felt a little too good. She let out a satisfied sigh. “If that’s not a pedicure… I don’t know what is,” she commented then stood up and shook, splashing water all over the floor.

I unplugged the tub and stepped out, using a towel to dry myself off. The snorkeling sound of last bits of water going down the drain echoed in the bathroom. I stepped out of the puddles and tossed Lassie a few extra dry towels. “Here, clean up your mess,” I told her as I continued to dry myself.

She just rolled her eyes and tossed the towels over the wet spots, not bothering to actually mop it up. As I set the towel aside, Lassie spoke out and zipped over. “Woah! Look at that thing! It's huge… I mean, it’s not absurdly humongous like porn actors, but look at it!” she exclaimed, taking hold of my erection that I didn’t know I had.

“AHH! EH!” I gasped, jolting back and trying to hide my erect cock from view, and failing miserably at that.

“What?!” Lassie exclaimed.

“Don’t do that,” I replied and she cocked an eyebrow.

“Why not? I was just looking. It’s kinda cool looking. It doesn’t look at all like any cocks I’ve seen in pornos,” she commented and my cheeks went a hue of red.

“Just… it’s weird okay,” I told her and she scoffed.

“Why is it weird?” she asked.

“Because you’re my dog,” I told her and she rolled her eyes with a 'Pfft'.

“So… I just wanted to look. Besides, you fucked Twilight, who is a pony… WHO, I might add, you consider your mother so that’s like… double whammy!”

I bit my lower lip and she stepped forwards, still on all fours and looked up to me with an almost sultry look. “So can I please just take a look at it… the thing looks interesting,” she asked. She had me kinda pinned a little with her arguments.

“Fine… but just looking,” I told her. I looked away in embarrassment. This was absolutely absurd. First I had sex with my mother, now my dog was eyeing up my cock… what next?!

“Wow… it’s all like… veiny and stiff and stuff… And it's not all flared out on the end like a horse cock. I mean, it's not quite as big as a horse cock, but then again I guess ponies can only fuck for like... twenty seconds tops... a few minutes if they stop to calm down, but those pornos are the worst cause it feels like you're just watching a stallion trying hard not to cum...” she trailed off and I felt her one paws brush up against it.

I let out a sharp gasp of pleasure and jerked back, butting up against the wall. “Haa… I s-said looking only,” I told her but she persisted with cornering me and taking a closer look. I squirmed against the wall as she fondled with my erection.

“Calm down,” she ordered me. “I just wanna take a better observation of this thing,” she told me. My right leg stiffened and jerked a bit. “Oh cool… it twitches without cumming… are you making it do that?” she asked.

“It’s involuntary,” I hissed.

“Cool!” she commented then stroked me a bit more. “Oh hey look, there’s like… a sheath or something,” she commented as she began playing with me a bit more. Oh goddess… I was getting jerked off by my dog… I felt so ashamed and disgraced with myself.

Without another second however, she just stopped. “Well, thanks,” she said and walked away.

“Ugh… that’s it?” I asked, sort of in disbelief. She looked back to me.

“What… did you think I was gonna suck you off or something?” she asked and then fluffed her tail and walked with a sway in her hips. I just shook the image, and part of the occurrence, from my mind. I cannot believe that just happened. This world was tearing me apart. If having sex with my mom wasn’t enough… having my talking dog feel me up…

I slipped my necklace and eye patch back on then mingled down to my room, looking for some fresh clothes. I’d have to do laundry today, or at least tomorrow by the latest. I grabbed a simple pair of underwear and moseyed back upstairs.

Lassie was gnawing on a frozen pizza while watching some morning kids cartoons. I looked to my watch. It was almost five thirty. I mingled beside the couch while Lassie continued to chew at the frozen piece of pizza. “You know… the idea is that you’re supposed to cook that,” I told her.

She chewed and chomped hard at the pizza and took off a good slice then shook her head. “Nah… that’d take too long,” she commented. I just rolled my eyes and took a seat next to her. As I did however, my stomach grumbled. Lassie wafted the pizza at me.

“Wan’ some?” she asked through a mouthful. I looked over to the chewed up pizza, covered in dog drool.

“I’ll pass,” I replied. We started watching the morning cartoons. This particular cartoon was about an evil goldfish that had a goofy octopus sidekick that always screwed up his master plan in some way. It was… okay I guess, and the black and white color really made me feel nostalgic.

As the half-hour cartoon came to its conclusion, I yawned and decided to get something to eat. As I walked into the kitchen, my bare feet felt a little chilly. I hopped a little through the kitchen. “Wonder what it’s like having hooves,” I muttered to myself as I began looking for something suitable.

Lassie opened the fridge and I looked over to her. “What’s it like walking on the cold floor with bare paws?” I asked curiously. She just shrugged.

“Meh… the pads on my paws are like the calluses on your hands,” she informed me. I just nodded and watched as she pulled out some eggs and a block of cheese. “Grab the milk would yah,” she ordered me.

I went for the cartons of milk as she asked me to do, while she grabbed some potatoes and bread. “Scrambled egg sandwiches?” I asked but she shook her head.

First she got the pan on the stove nice and heated up, then used some butter to lubricate the surface a little. “Mind cracking like… a dozen or so eggs into a bowl for me?” she asked and I obliged. She took out a whisk and beat them then poured them into a pan. As she did that, I heated up a second pan and started frying potatoes.

“I wish we had some bacon,” I mentioned and she rubbed her chin.

“What’s bacon taste like?” she asked curiously, having never been gifted with the taste of it. I doubt there was even a single place in Equestria I could buy bacon. I suppose I could try and make it myself, but it’d turn out bad and I’d probably be shunned or something.

“Bacon tastes like… it’s probably the single most delicious food there is,” I stated. She licked her chops.

“Mmm… oh goddess that sounds good… hey wanna do me a favour?” she asked.

“If you ask nicely,” I responded.

“Go kill me a pig, cut it up and make me some bacon,” she joked. I just laughed at the joking request. She took out a steel spatula and began scrambling the eggs. “Okay… shred up some cheese,” she ordered me.

“Oh… I know what you’re doing,” I said. I shredded up some cheese with a grater and sprinkled the cheese over the eggs… a lot of cheese.

Just before they were done, I toasted some bread slices and buttered them. As we finished, we split the food down the middle and loaded up our plates with a high cholesterol breakfast.

As we sat down I looked at the food on my plate, said food reminding me of back home. “You know… I once had a heart condition eh,” I stated and Lassie looked up with a cocked eyebrow.

“Really? What was it?” she asked.

“Well… you see, I used to do a lot of physical labour, between playing football, chopping wood… being a lumberjack-“ Lassie cut me short.

“Woah-woah-WOAH… You were a lumberjack?” she asked and I sighed.

“Yeah-yeah… I’m Canadian and I was a lumberjack for a while,” I muttered, admitting to the old stereotype.

“No… it’s not that… you said you’re like what… seventeen?” she asked.

“Oh… jeeze… ah dunno. Probably something like that,” I commented. She just stared at me.

“What do you mean ‘Something like that’? How old are you?” she asked. The question stumped me.

I started rubbing the one side of my forehead then stroked down to my neck and gave it an attentive rub while I thought. “Okay uhm… let’s see… I was born back in ninety-five… and it’s twenty-fourteen now…” I said and Lassie blinked.

“Woah! You’re wayyyy older than seventeen… you’re like… nineteen,” she said, doing the math for me.

“Uhm… no actually, not yet. I was born in July, so I'd be almost nineteen,” I replied and she blinked.

“Wait! I thought you said you were seventeen when you arrived here,” she interrogated. I just rolled my eyes with a sigh.

“Well… I forgot how old I was,” I said, trying to forget about it.

“What do you mean you forgot how old you were? How do you forget how old you are?!” She almost laughed.

“Because… I was working okay. I was just living day to day… month to month. I didn’t really… I wasn’t really looking forward to anything so I wasn’t keeping track of the days,” I replied and she stifled a laugh.

“Not looking forwards to your birthday?! How could you not look forward to your birthday. There’s like, balloons and cake and-“ I cut her short.

“I was working on my birthday last year,” I commented.

“Okay, so you worked during the day but you came home then partied right?” she asked but I shook my head.

“I worked late,” I said, nearly wanting to forget the whole topic.

“Okay, so you worked late, doesn’t mean your mom wouldn’t have thrown you a party. Am I right?” she asked but I took a deep, hard swallow.

“She was drunk,” I said, under my breath and barely loud enough for her to hear. She stopped in her tracks. I had told Lassie a few stories about my real mother, she must’ve just forgot in haste to figure out why I hadn’t remembered my birthday, nor how old I was.

“Oh…” she trailed off and looked solemnly to her plate. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to bring it up,” she apologized sincerely. I just nodded my head from side to side.

“No surprise really,” I whispered and Lassie bit her lip.

“Well… what about a day or two later? Throw yourself a party,” she opted but I just shook my head.

“Like I said… I just lived day to day, not really looking forwards to anything… and getting older wasn’t something I really felt like celebrating,” I muttered.

She bit her lip. “Okay… well… how ‘bout your last birthday party… fun right?” she asked, hoping to enlighten the topic. I just shrugged.

“I was pretty young… still in public school. I was at my buddy’s house for a few days and my mom was supposed to come pick me up… but she got drunk off her ass and I didn’t have a way to get back home… I guess I could’ve walked but that woulda taken a few hours… so my friend’s mom bought me a cake and they sang me happy birthday,” I said, trying to hold back the tears in my eye, my breathing a little shallow.

Lassie bit her lip, seeing the downwards spiral this topic was taking. “Let’s go back to your heart condition… you we’re saying you were a lumberjack… at like seventeen?” she asked.

“Actually… I was about fifteen at the time, turning sixteen.” I replied, shaking off the previous topic.

“Jesus… how could you handle that?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“I was always a big kid, a Canadian no less. All Canadians are lumberjacks," I joked. "Anyway, between all the physical labor and exertion, I liked to eat a lot to sustain my metabolism. So every breakfast since I was… I dunno, about eleven or twelve, I’d have somewhere between a dozen and eighteen eggs, with shredded cheese and buttered toast for breakfast… every morning,” I told her and she blinked.

“Goddess… talk about cholesterol,” she laughed and I nodded.

“That was part of it…anyway, so I was out and about the one day, getting groceries and what not, and I got some blood work done. Anyway, the doctor comes back with my results and is just… his mind is blown. First thing he asked me was: Are you on drugs?” I laughed and Lassie stifled a laugh that ended up leaving through her nostrils.

I settled myself and continued. “So I told him no. Then he asked if I was under the influence of alcohol, again I said no. Then he asked if I had just participated in a marathon or if I had just run a long distance… and I told him no,” I said then snickered a bit.

“What?” Lassie asked and I rose my index figure, motioning her to wait a moment.

“So he… pfft… pulls out this piece of paper and is like: Oh sir, your dystonic and systolic rate is through the roof. You’re running an extremely high risk of a heart attack, you could could have a heart attack at any moment!” I just began to laugh and snicker but Lassie was blinking, unsure what was so funny.

“Wha… what’s so funny?” Lassie asked and I just shrugged.

“Oh I dunno… a regular man’s systolic rate should be about one-twenty, mine was two-twenty-four or something like that, and diastolic rate should be around eighty… mine was one-sixty,” I laughed and Lassie just blinked.

“I… I still don’t see what’s so funny about that… I mean if your rates were that high… you could’ve died at any moment… hey wait a minute! Your rates aren't still that high are they?” she gasped but I shook my head.

“Nah… it took me a long while to get it back down, at my grandmother’s request. For like a year and a half I was eating berries and melons with fruit drinks. Kinda got me a little antsy when everyone else would be eating steak and eggs with bacon. After a while my rates kinda returned to normal. They were over by just a little bit but for a young kid it was manageable,” I told her and she just exhaled in relief.

“Whew… why do you think that’s so funny?” she asked and I just shrugged with my hands up.

“I dunno… makes for an entertaining story I guess,” I said, not quite sure what I found so hilarious about the story.

“Well… don’t go dying on me from a heart attack,” Lassie said as she started devouring her food.

“Don’t you go dying of a heart attack,” I said and she looked up, a thick string of cheese dangling from her lips and stringing down to the plate of eggs. “I see how much junk food you eat, keep it up and you might end up just like me,” I told her. She just blinked then continued eating carelessly.

As we sat there and ate, I felt a pain, not a real physical pain… but an emotional one. The memories from our earlier topic resurfaced… all those birthdays-

I scrunched my nose and bit down hard, clenching my eye shut. Lassie looked up to me. “Hey… you’re not… having a heart attack or something… are you?” she asked worriedly.

I just shook my head. “No-no… just a… piece of shell I think.” I lied, trying even harder to push the memories away, suppress them and bury them so deep that they’d never come up again.

Lassie and I finished breakfast and began cleaning the place up as best we could. Just as we were washing the dishes, there was a knock at the door. I left Lassie to the dishes and went to answer the door.

I swung it open, only to find a young pegasi at the door. Oh wait! I remember this one. Scootles… err… something like that. “Hey… Scoot…sss,” I said, remembering that the pegasus filly’s name started with Scoot. Fuck it, I’d just call her Scoots until I remembered what her name was.

“I’m really sorry to bother you but… is Rainbow Dash here? I can’t find her anywhere!” the filly asked and I turned and looked into the house.

“Uhm… no, sorry kid, she’s not,” I said.

“Oh… oh no! Oh where is she?!” Scoots cried to herself, tears almost welting in her eyes.

I thought about it. The news had said traffic, railways and even the docks in that area where backed up and jammed due to all the thoroughfare trying to get in and out of the city. “She's probably in Baltimare… traffic’s really backed up,” I informed her and she bit her lower lip and became fidgety.

“Oh no! But she promised she’d be here! She promised!” Scoots eyes began to water up with tears.

“Be here for what?” I asked curiously.

“She was gonna come with me for Family Appreciation day at school… And Rainbow Dash was gonna be there as my sister… and… and she promised… but she isn’t here,” her tears began to trickle down her cheeks.

I scratched my head. If this was so important… then why the hell hadn’t Rainbow Dash just flown home… I mean, yeah it was a long way but she was fast. Scoots began to weep as she spoke. “I was gonna be the coolest kid in class… because Rainbow Dash was gonna be there with me! And she was gonna do a Sonic Rainboom!” she cried.

I remembered something Twilight once told me… something about Rainbow Dash adopting a filly as her sister or something… shit, I wish now I hadn’t thought all those stories to be utterly useless. “Okay-okay-okay kid… it’ll be okay… I’m sure things’ll work out,” I tried to assure her. She just blinked and looked up to me.

“But it won’t! I just know it won’t! School starts in an hour and she isn’t here!” Her tears and saddened face almost made me want to start crying… they just reminded me of… I bit my lip and tried again to suppress the memories trying to surface themselves.

She began to trot off, still crying to herself. I bit my lip so hard I nearly yelped in pain. Something… I don’t even know what it was, seemed to flash in my mind as my head jerked upright. “HEY WAIT! KID!” I called out but she kept trotting away.

I rushed out of the library, still in my boxers, and cut her off. “Wait… okay… so Rainbow Dash isn’t here, and I know she promised but I’m sure there’s a good reason she isn’t here… how about you get somepony else to step in for her,” I offered but she just continued to sniffle.

“But Rainbow Dash is the coolest… and I wanted her to be here more than anything,” she got choked up on a sniffle.

“Okay… okay but what if… you got somepony… someone almost as cool as Rainbow Dash to be your family just for today?” I asked and she just blinked.

“But… but there’s nopony around that’s almost as cool as her.” I just stood there for a moment before realizing she wasn’t catching on to what I was hinting at.

I snapped with both hands then pointed my thumbs at myself. “How about this guy? I got some cool stories that’d probably make the average pony’s tale seem dull,” I offered but she just blinked.

“B-b-but… you’re not my family,” she countered and I just sighed.

“Well… uhh… does it really matter right now?” I asked and she just stood there, hiccupping, finally done her crying. “Then it’s settled. I’ll be your brother for the day, and be super-cool just for you,” I informed her. “Just let me get changed.” I ran into the house and slipped into a fresher pair of underwear.

I looked around for a nice pair of pants. Derreck had ruined my nice trousers… well, he hadn’t ruined them technically… but they were black now. On that note… Rarity was gonna be so pissed when she got back. I had thought yesterday that I’d simply pay her back, but then I realized I had less than five hundred bits left… I don’t even know where all my money went. I mean, yeah I had gotten some fancy meals but I had like fifty grand… now I had barely a one percent of that… dammit! Where the hell'd it all go?!

I scourged through my dirty clothes, only finding one pair of decently clean pants. They had a stain on the side of the left leg from mustard but… the pants were khaki colored dress pants. It’d look so goofy.

I discarded the thought and slipped them on. With that, I put on a white V-neck t-shirt and finally flipped on my duster coat. As I went to leave, I grabbed my leather cowboy hat. Lassie hollered out to me. “Hey! Where do you think you’re going?!” she asked inquiringly.

“I gotta go to… it’s a long story,” I replied and she rushed to my side.

“Well you’re not leaving me behind to clean everything. I’m coming with you!” she announced. I just nodded as we rushed out, making sure to close the door behind us.

Scooter was there, waiting and obviously unsure about all this. “Trust me kiddo, this’ll be fine,” I assured her. I opened the passenger door on Cadence, Lassie hopped right into the back seat. “Back seat driver! Totally call it!” she proclaimed her territory.

I helped Scoots into the passenger seat then shut the door before running over to my side and hopping in. Lassie looked over. “What’s the rush?” my canine friend asked and Scoot nearly jumped out of her skin.

“Woah! Your dog can talk?!” she asked in shock and I nodded.

“Yeah, don’t get her started,” I replied as I started the truck. I reached into the back and grabbed my big handgun, and secured it to my leg with the custom leg holster.

“Okay seriously... what’s going on?” Lassie asked.

“We’re… going to school. Lassie, today we’re Scoots’s family." Scoot just blinked in uncertainty.

Lassie leaned out of her seat and grabbed my arm, rolling back my duster sleeve to check the time. “School starts in like… almost an hour,” she stated and I nodded.

“I know… but maybe we should get some morning treats before departing for a long…” I shuddered. “Day of school,” I said with a faked smile. Lassie belched loudly.

“Oh I dunno man… I don’t know if I could handle anything-“ I cut her short.

“Tim Horsetons?” I asked the two.

Scoots liked the idea, she didn’t say anything but I caught a faint glimpse of her tongue licking her lips. Lassie’s ears perked up in attention from the comment. “Tim Horsetons... it is,” I said before tugging the gearshift into drive and pulling away with haste.

Within a few minutes we pulled up to the Tim Horsetons, but unlike my world’s equivalent… this one unfortunately didn’t have a drive-thru.

I left Cadence running as I hopped out. Lassie, so much excitement built up inside of her, didn’t even bother waiting for me to open the passenger door and simply hopped over the center console and out the driver door behind me before I could even shut it.

I walked over and helped Scoot out of the truck. ‘Her name is… Scoots-er… Scooter… Skeeter… shit ah dunno,’ I thought to myself. I didn’t have the guts to ask her. I was supposed to act like a family member yet I didn’t even remember her name… long-lost relative.

The three of us walked in and I was again met by Mary, the friendly… kinda clutzy, cashier. Lassie hopped up and put her front paws on the counter and began to order. “Hey hot stuff-“ she began, making the cashier blush timidly. “Can I get… a cappuccino with whip cream and chocolate syrup… and a...” she trailed off, rubbing her chin in thought. “I’ll have two chocolate chip muffins with that,” she ordered.

I stepped up. “Can I have-“ but Lassie cut me off.

“A powder jelly doughnut, and a cup of honey tea with a little umbrella and lemon swedge,” she joked in a flamboyant voice. I blinked and Mary just looked to me, looking for a response.

“Actually… yeah, I’ll have that,” I stated and Lassie snickered. “What?” I asked and she just gave me an innocent look.

“Nothing, nothing at all,” she replied cheekily. I looked to Skeeter… or whatever her name was.

“Whatta’ll yah have?” I asked her and she just rubbed one of her front hooves on the ground in a timid way.

“Oh… it’s okay… I already ate this morning,” she mumbled.

“Bah, don’t give me that. I ate a huge breakfast this morning. Fast food is fast food kiddo, and free fast food is even better. So order up, it’s the least I can do as a big brother.” I gave her a wink.

“Oh… okay. Can I have a carton of milk and some chocolate cookies?” She asked. I nodded.

Mary typed it in, and as per usual, kinda messed up the order, putting extra things like tomatoes with the cookies and… a bunch of other things. “Uhm… tomatoes with cookies?” I asked and she got a little flustered.

“I’m really sorry… I just…” she bit her lip as she started to break down in a panic. I reached my hand over and put it atop her hoof.

“Hey… relax, I ain’t in no hurry,” I offered her some comfort. She took a few deep breaths and typed it in, though still screwed up the order. I just laughed heartily and paid the bill anyway, despite being charged for two hot chocolates and a cinnamon roll.

We grabbed our stuff and began walking out when Mary called over to me. “Wait… hold on, I’m sorry, I charged you for some hot chocolates and a cinnamon roll,” she said. “I’ll get those right away… or I’ll give you your money back,” she began but I just waved it off.

“Nah it’s okay,” I assured her and the three of us walked out. I helped Lassie and Scoot… whatever her name was, into the truck which I had left running.

I hopped into the driver seat and set my hot tea drink in the cup holder, beside Scoot’s chocolate milk. Lassie had set her cappuccino in the arm rest cup holder in the back. ‘Oh yeah… the back has those armrests with the cup holders built into it!’ I thought to myself. I rarely was in the back of my truck and there were cool things about her I didn’t even know about.

I slipped the truck into drive and proceeded over to the school with a rather calm pace, no need to rush it. I checked my watch. We were still early, seeing as how nopony else was around. I shut Cadence off and stuffed the keys atop the sun visor, like I always did.

“Thank you,” Scoot thanked me… I was just gonna call her my sister until I figured out what her name was.

“Yeah, no problem sis,” I said as I took my cup of tea, moving the umbrella to the side and taking a sip. “Mmm… now that’s good stuff,” I said, taking a bite out of my jelly doughnut.

“Says the fruit-cake,” Lassie said discriminately, though in a PG fashion so that my temporary sister wouldn’t learn any bad language.

“I don’t understand how eating a jelly doughnut with a cup of tea makes me a fruit-cake,” I stated back and she just rolled her eyes.

“Because only fruits would drink a cup of honey tea with a tiny umbrella and a lemon wedge… and powder doughnuts are totally for mares. You probably like to take long walks on the beach, then watch the sunset with a stallion,” she said and I just rolled my eyes.

“Yeah, fine, I’m a fruit-cake that likes long walks on the beaches and sunsets with stallions,” I said then looked to my temporary sister for the day, whom had opened the entire top part of her milk carton and was dipping her cookies in it. “Hey… that’s a cool idea, where’d you learn it?” I asked, interested by the technique.

“Oh… I uhm… just kinda do that sometimes… sorry, I know it’s kind of dorky,” she replied in a shy ton and I just scoffed.

“Nah, that’s cool. Who in the world ever told you that’s dorky?” I asked.

“Diamond Tiara,” she replied back and I just rolled my eyes as I took a sip of my tea.
“Well next time she tells you that, tell her that she’s dorky for wearing that dumb crown,” I told her and she snickered.

“It is kind of silly,” she giggled and we both started to snicker, though Lassie was a bit lost, since she had never met Diamond Tiara before.

“You know, back on my world, I’d have a carton of chocolate milk before milking the cows every morning. But I’d always open up the entire top side of the carton like you did so I could drink it,” I informed her.

She and Lassie both looked at me and asked the same thing in unison. “Why?”

I just shrugged. “Well… I guess I didn’t like the feeling from the top of the carton touching my nose while I drank,” I informed her. We sat and conversed, mostly useless gibber-jabber, until finally Ms. Cheerilee arrived and opened the door.

Scootaloo looked to the door to try and see how to get it open. I tapped her on the shoulder. “Hold on kid… let’s not be the first ones in the class,” I suggested. She looked to me with a curious look and I just gave her an unknowing look. “I dunno… just wait for somepony else to arrive first,” I said. In truth, I didn’t exactly want to get in the school first… something about being the first in the class always made me feel weird and like a goody-two-shoes.

After several minutes past, fillies and colts started arriving with their relatives. Some had obvious distinctions in their relations, some… didn’t even look close. We waited just a little longer and I nodded. “Okay… let’s go,” I said, leaning over and opening my sister’s door from the inside.

Lassie and my sister hopped out, the former closing the door behind them. I shut my door and wiped my hands off on my pants, white powder smearing on my khaki dress pants. ‘Dammit,’ I thought to myself silently.

As we entered, Cheerilee turned to great us, then stopped short as she saw both Lassie and myself. “Good morning Scootaloo…” she trailed off in wonder as she looked at us.

“Scootaloo! That’s her name!” I announced, though rather loudly… it was totally an accident. The class all looked to me, even Scootaloo did, with weird looks. “That’s… her name... coolest filly around… Scootaloo!” I said, sounding like a dork while still trying to cover up the fact that 1: I had forgot her name and 2: I had forgotten her name and was supposed to be pretending to be her relative.

Cheerilee blinked. “Uhm… yes, well… good morning to you all,” she greeted. Lassie mingled over and placed one of her muffins on the desk.

Cheerilee looked in surprise. “Well… now that’s something you don’t see every day. Thank you,” Cheerilee thanked my canine companion whom, for some reason wasn’t talking. Cheerilee rubbed Lassie’s head, who in turn nestled her head into the teacher's side briefly before quickly returning to my side.

The three of us quickly took our seats and let the day begin. In a matter of minutes however, I found out this wasn’t going to be a regular school day, not at all. Instead it was just a day packed of fillies and colts with a relative and that relative telling the class what they did for a living and their family history and all that.

I leaned over to Scootaloo. “Huh… not bad, I thought I’d be stuck doing homework,” I said with a smile. She nodded and leaned into me with a hug.

“Thanks for coming. I don’t know what I would’ve done,” she thanked me and I just smiled timidly. There was this warm feeling… it made me feel all mushy inside. The day progressed and relative after relative spoke their story. Some were kind of lame, I had to admit, and were just stories about living in a house while once a day doing a paper route, or something like that. 'I live in a house by myself. I'm a papermare... blah, blah blah' my conscious joked.

Some however, did have some kinds of interesting stories. Like Big Mac, whom Apple Bloom had brought in. Stories about a wild adventure or two. Sweetie Belle had brought her dad who… I don’t know if he was trying too hard to be a redneck or… he had a pair of coveralls on that were torn in a few places, a straw cowpony hat and was chewing on a piece of wheat.

Cheerilee spoke up. “Scootaloo?” she asked and Scootaloo stood up. Lassie jabbed me in the ribs.

“Ahh… what?” I hissed quietly.

“That’s your queue dumbass,” she whispered back. I looked and saw Scootaloo looking to me.

“Ah… righto.” I stood up and followed her to the front of the class. I hadn’t really paid attention all that much and had never done something like this before. The class stood in silence for a moment before Cheerilee broke it.

“Uhm… Scootaloo… care to… introduce your… relative?” she said in a very unsure tone.

Diamond Tiara picked up with a snide tone. I only remembered her name because she was that snide little shithead who thought she was on top of the world. “He’s not related to her at all, he’s a monkey and she only brought him because Rainbow Dash ditched out on her because she’s sooooo uncool,” Diamond Tiara laughed, then her and the other silver mare who was her friend connected hooves… would it be called a high five here... but they didn’t have fingers so it’d be more like a… hoof… whatever.

Scootaloo got agitated and yelped back. “She did not ditch out on me!” she yelled and Diamond Tiara giggled, having gotten under her skin.

“So why isn’t she here then?” she continued to poke. Before Scootaloo could say another word however, I spoke up.

“Because she chose me instead,” I lied and Diamond Tiara laughed.

“Ha! So much for having Rainbow Dash do a Sonic Rainboom! I knew you were lying!” she cackled, only agitating Scootaloo further.

“Rainbow Dash was gonna be here… but she’s busy right now and couldn’t make it,” Scootaloo tried but Tiara just laughed and came up with yet another insult.

“Because you're not important enough for her.” I just bit my lip. I hated snot-nosed little brats.

“That’s not true!” I said angrily, temper simmering. Now she had me going. I calmed myself before I said something I would regret. “Rainbow Dash is busy right now so Scootaloo brought me instead, and Lassie, my dog,” I informed the class but again Tiara spoke up.

“You’re not even related to her,” she laughed and I thought up a lie, I thought it up quick.

“I’m her Father…’s, brother’s, nephew’s, cousin’s, sister’s, aunt’s, daughter in law’s former roommate… twice removed,” I lied, though it sounded totally believable… kind of.

The room was quiet for a moment and Cheerilee again spoke up. “Well than… that’s an interesting fact. So… what do you do for a living?” she asked. As I started, I began to pick up momentum with this whole ‘Relative day’ thing.

“Well… at the odd time I work with Big Mac over there, lugging around the heavy stuff, ain’t that right Mac?” I asked and some ponies looked to Mac who simply nodded with his regular ‘Eeyup’.

I looked around. “Sometimes I get around… going to the big cities, doing the odd job for ponies…” I trailed off and tried to think of something a mobster might say about whacking ponies. “Mostly yard trimmings,” I said.

Tiara just smiled smugly, I guess figuring that I wasn’t as spectacular as one might think. I just wish I could tell them the honest truth. I whacked an entire mob family, helped defeat Freeze and save a city, fought off an entire pack of timerwolves…

“Tack driving,” I said and waited a moment. “Anyone ever see a tack driver?” I asked. Most of the ponies blinked, unsure what I was talking about. I pulled away my duster coat flap and unholstered Belladonna.

“Look out that window… see the apple tree?” I asked and a few of the ponies looked out the window, Cheerilee included. “How far do yah think that there tree is?” I asked. Cheerilee looked then pondered it.

“Thirty to forty yards, why?” She asked curiously. I slide open a window, knelt down and rested my arm on the windowsill, handgun out the window and steady in my grip.

“Watch this,” I commented then turned to the class. “Cover your ears… this thing is loud,” I told them. A few of them listened to my warning while others just watched in curiosity, having never seen a gun before. I steadied the gun to an almost perfectly still state, my finger very slowly depressing the trigger.

I reached the sweet spot on the trigger, any more pressure and she’d go off like a powder keg. I let out my breath, then took a slight inhale. Time seemed to slow a little as I looked down the sights with my good eye.

My finger slowly squeezed all the way back, and the handgun roared. The sonic boom from the pistol, along with the muzzle blast, was so intense that it created a circular flash ring just a few feet in front of the pistol.

The heavy bullet sliced the top of a steam from an apple and it fell to the plush grassy ground, unscathed by the bullet. “Lassie, fetch,” I ordered and Lassie zoomed out the door, retrieved the apple and came racing back, sitting on her rump and presenting me the apple that was still held in her mouth.

I took the apple and wiped off the drool on my shirt, then huffed on the peel. My breath created a fog that quickly dissipated on the beautiful apple. It was truly a prize apple to say the least. I turned to Cheerilee.

“Apple?” I asked and she just smiled and laughed faintly while taking the apple.

“Well… that is an interesting… hobby, shall I call it… though it is rather loud and obnoxious,” she said. Tiara spoke up, again to try and get under my skin.

“There’s nothing really special about that. Any silly old unicorn can use magic to get an apple from a tree,” she snarked.

“Do I look like a unicorn to you? Maybe you should get your eyes checked,” I teased. However, much to my disdain, the class didn’t seem overly impressed. I suppose they didn’t understand how difficult a shot like that was… but then again I suppose they didn’t have guns either. Back on my world sure they would've been impressed… but also freaked out once they saw a gun on school property. Before Tiara could say something else, Cheerilee broke up the taunting before it escalated further.

“Well… I see that Scootaloo has a very interesting-“ but before she could continue, I thought of something.

“Hold on… there’s one more thing. Who knows the story about the illusive pirate… Peg Leg?” I asked. There was a short silence before one of the older relatives spoke up.

“You mean the old foal’s tale about a pirate who evaded the elite royal guard for years and plundered millions of bits worth of gold and treasure?” he asked and I nodded.

“That exact tale… now what if I said… it was true?” I asked the class.

A few of the older ponies looked at each other than to me, even Cheerilee gave me a wondering look. “Who here… knows what Peg Leg did to his own personal treasure?” I asked.

“Kept it?” one of the older ponies said.

“Hid it somewhere?” said another. I just groaned. Dammit, even I didn’t know who he was until I got roped into that adventure with Daring Do. So I suppose I couldn’t blame them for not knowing that he-

“He inscribed his initials into the gold, mostly the gold billon bricks,” Cheerilee stated for all the class to hear. I looked to her with an almost shocked expression. She matched my expression. “What? I’m a school teacher’s for colts and fillies. I read them stories and sometimes research the actual events that they're based after,” she replied.

Well, at least now everypony knew what I was gonna show them was the real deal. “Just hold that thought,” I said then scurried out to my truck. I began rummaging through the back. “I left it in here somewhe-“ I trailed off as I saw the glimmering golden gleam of the treasure piece.

I grabbed it then rushed back inside. “Check out… this puppy,” I said and placed the brick on the table. Everypony stood up instantly then trotted up to see it, and most all of them were fairly impressed.

Cheerilee looked to me with shock. “That belongs in a museum,” she commented but I just shrugged.

“Actually, I brought two to the museum so me and Dar…" I trailed off, remembering that for some reason everypony thought Daring Do was a fictional character. "Daryl could get paid. Daryl was the stallion with me when we went searching for the treasure,” I said and another relative pony spoke up.

“You’re also a treasure hunter?” he asked in particular interest. I just shrugged.

“Sometimes,” I sort of lied. Diamond Tiara’s father, Filthy Rich, looked with interest at the gold brick.

“I do say… I wish to buy this piece from you dear sir… twenty thousand, in cash,” he offered but I just shook my hand.

“Sorry buddy, not for sale. Besides, the museum gave me fifty large, per brick,” I replied.

“In that case… sixty,” he offered but I shook my head. “Seventy,” he offered again but I just smiled and shook my head.

“It’s really not for-“

“Eighty-five thousand,” he bargained and some ponies looked with wide, shocked eyes to me. That was a wad of cash. Cash which I could use.

“Sorry but I-“

“Ninety,” he offered.

“Buddy… I thought you were an intelligent business stallion. There’s nothing-“

“You drive a hard bargain… a hundred and fifty thousand, final offer,” he stated and a lot of the ponies gasped.

Lassie grabbed the cuff on my duster coat sleeve and tugged me down. “You could take me on a vacation to Marexico with that kinda money, even rent a top floor condo,” she told me.

I let out a deep, depressed exhale. “You see sir… Mr. Rich… it’s not about the money, not at all. This piece of gold… it holds sentimental value. I’ll always remember the adventure I had, the struggles and hardships I had to go through… the near-death experience… when I hold this, all those vivid memories come back. So as generous as that offer is, I’m sorry but I must decline,” I told him. A lot of gasps were emitted from the crowd.

Tiara looked at me with a slacked jaw. I guess she thought money could buy anything. Scootaloo looked to her with a smug smile. “He’s my dad’s brother’s… something ruther. And he’s totally awesome,” she said then stuck her tongue out at Tiara.

Rich just stood there in awe and disbelief. “Tell yah what pal,” I said and gave him a cheery pat to the shoulder. “You pay me a fare wage, say fifteen bits an hour, I’ll take you to the river where all the debris fell when the place blew up... and we'll pan for gold,” I offered and his face brightened up.

A few moments passed and everypony settled back to their seats. Cheerilee nodded while looking to Scootaloo. “I do say… that is quite impressive. Is there anything else you can tell us about him, Scootaloo?” Cheerilee asked, but Scootaloo’s answer was not one I was expecting, not at all.

“He’s a fruit-cake and likes to watch sunsets with stallions,” she stated innocently, not understanding the context of what she had just said. The younger fillies and colts just blinked in uncertainty, while Cheerilee and all the older ponies went wide eyed.

I just groaned quietly and covered my face in embarrassment. Cheerilee blinked then coughed to catch everypony’s attention. “Yes well… uhm… that’s very interesting. Give a big round of applause for Scootaloo and her…” she trailed off and tried to remember what exactly I had said, and then just came up with a single word to describe it. “Relative.”

I went to grab the gold brick but Lassie stood up. “Nah, it’s cool yah fruit-cake. I got this one, wouldn’t want yah straining yourself,” Lassie joked. Nearly everypony in the classed gasped as they heard a dog talk.

“Th-tha-that d-d-dog just talked!” Gasped one of the older ponies. Lassie turned around with a cock-eyed look.

“So? That’s one of the least impressive things about me...” and with that, Lassie started a half-hour long rant about all her great adventures… most of them highly fabricated. However, despite that, she kept the audience’s full attention.

Cheerilee interrupted Lassie before she could start yet another one of her most likely fabricated stories. “Yes, well I apologize but class is just about over-“ but she was cut off by all the young colts and fillies, who all gave out a pouty ‘AWWWW’.

Cheerilee sighed. “Yes... well children, just remember that tomorrow we’ll be finishing up with our history of the pony settlers in the Midwest,” she explained and my eyes went wide for a moment. Jeeze… I didn’t learn much about history until I was in grade… probably ten or eleven… either that or I just didn’t listen enough in public school.

“Can Lassie come in and tell us more stories tomorrow?” Asked one of the fillies, who had milk colored fur and frazzled red hair. The whole class waited in undivided attention for their teacher's answer.

Cheerilee only blinked then turned to me. “Uhm… well, we must really be finishing that subject and I’m sure Lassie has-“ but my canine companion cut her short.

“Are you kidding me?! Don’t try and say I have stuff to do, cause I don’t. I’d LOVE to tell you guys all about my wickedly awesome adventures. Man, they’re so awesome I-“ but I cut Lassie short by stuffing part of my duster coat in her mouth. Her muffled vocals still echoed in the classroom as I spoke.

“What she meant to say was, she’d love to spend some time, but only if it doesn’t impede your studies…right Lassie?” I asked sternly and she spat out my duster flap and began mumbling.

“Pfft… yeah whatever… put words in my mouth why don’t yah…” trailing off, she said something under her breath that I didn’t quite catch, but it sounded like ‘Queer’.

I just rolled my eyes and nodded. Cheerilee began to speak. “Okay, with that settled, have a nice night everypony and I’ll see you all in the morning,” she said in a spiffy voice. Jeeze, she sounded like every teacher did that first week of school when they pretend like they’re the most laid back teachers ever… then after that first week they’re all crusty.

As the children and their elder relatives left, one of the stallions stopped and handed me a piece of paper. I looked to him and he motioned as if he was on a phone, and then mouthed the words ‘Call me’.

I shuddered then looked to Lassie as ponies continued to leave. “See what you’ve done?!” I hissed at her then crumpled up the paper and tossed it at her. I turned to Scootaloo. “Hey uhm… so are you… I mean Rainbow Dash isn’t home so… wanna just hang out with me?” I asked.

She just smiled. “Oh, thank you but no thank you. It’s okay, I’ve been staying with Apple Bloom while I wait for Dash to get back,” she said. She gave me a wave as she scurried off towards Mac and Apple Bloom. I returned the wave and just sighed as I watched all the kids depart.

As the school day ended and nopony was left, I got thinking to myself about all the crabby teachers I had over the years. Sure not every single one was a miserable twat, but a lot of them were.

My conscious spoke up. ‘I don’t understand why teachers think their job is so hard… kids are kinda alright,’ it spoke and I just nodded, leaning up against the side of the door frame. “Yeah… I don’t know why teachers have to be so crabby when kids are so-“ but I was cut off by a teasing voice that came from behind me.

“I am not crabby,” Cheerilee said in a semi-playful one.

“Huh?” I muttered as I turned around, then merely chuckled timidly. “Oh… no, not you. I wasn’t talking about you,” I apologized and she rose an eyebrow.

“Well who were you talking to?” she asked and I just blinked.

“To myself,” I said and she just laughed and shook her head with a faint blush.

“The children can be a hassle sometimes, that’s for sure,” she mentioned then leaned against the other side of the door frame.

“I had a kid once… kinda. I was his… legal guardian by law or… something like that. Called him my son. Easy going kid,” I said and Cheerilee smiled.

“You’d make a good father,” she said honestly.

I just shrugged. “Well… I dunno about that. It may come off that way but right now… I’d have to settle down first,” I said honestly. Truth be told, I’d only thought about kids once or twice before, and it was more or less a joke about adopting a child and giving it a difficult name that he’d be unable to spell when he was young so he'd cry when the teacher asked 'How do you spell your name' and my kid would begin to cry and be like 'I DON'T KNOW!'

Cheerilee let out a content sigh as we stood and watched the sun hover over the horizon. “Say…” Cheerilee began. “You wouldn’t mind giving me a walk home… would you?” she asked hopefully. I turned my head to her and nodded.

“Sure… I wouldn’t mind-“ but Lassie cut me off before I could continue.

“If you’re walking her home, I’m taking the truck home. I’m hungry and I'm not waiting around,” she said abruptly.

“Lassie… that’s a bad idea,” I said and Lassie just scoffed.

“Oh please. It’s easy to drive… come on man, show me a bit a trust would yah?” she pleaded and I just sighed.

“Fine! But I swear to goddess if there’s even a single scratch I’ll-“ but she cut me off in a sexual tone.

“You’ll spank me?!”

“What… no!”

“Tie me up with hoof-cuffs?!”

“What?! N-no! Lassie just… just go on!” I scowled and she just gave me a mischievous smile then grabbed the gold brick and scooted off. Cheerilee turned to me with her brow raised.

“She’s a spoiled little thing, isn’t she?” she asked and I just huffed.

“Yeah… yeah she is… but that’s Lassie for you,” I commented. I had this terrible feeling that when I got home, my lights would be busted… or there’d be a dent in the fender… or something awful.

Cheerilee grabbed a few things, and trotted over. She closed the door to the school but never locked it. “Don’t lock it up for the night?” I asked and she looked to me with an almost stunned look.

“Lock it up? Why?” she asked curiously.

“Well… I dunno… burglars?” I suggested but she just laughed with a more feminine laugh that sounded like it should belong more so to Rarity.

“In Ponyville? No way. Why crime is so low here that… well, you could probably leave that gold brick out in the streets and it’d be there in the morning, either that or it would be in the lost and found,” she stated and I rose an eyebrow.

“What about Filthy Rich? Wouldn’t he scoop it up?” I asked but she shook her head.

“I’d personally doubt that. He may be a business stallion, but he’s no thief. And besides, that’s pretty rare and unique so I doubt he’d get away with it. I think he just wanted it to show off to his other rich friends,” she commented as we mingled through the streets of Ponyville.

I thought back to what she said about me being a father. “You really think I’d be a good dad?” I asked and she looked to me then nodded.

“Well of course. Why not? You seem to be good with children, and you even keep you temper in check with Diamond Tiara… she can be a bit of a nuisance at times,” Cheerilee said and we both giggled.

“Well… thanks. And I think you’d make a pretty cool mom,” I said and she stopped then looked to me.

“You… you really think so?” she asked and I shrugged then nodded.

“Well sure. I mean you teach a class of fillies and colts every single day, except weekends and such… I think the kids respect you and for that reason… yeah, you’d make a good mom,” I told her truthfully.

“Thank you, that means a lot.” She smiled but I just chuckled.

“Just uhh… think about it first okay, cause my thoughts and ideas aren’t always the greatest and sometimes backfire right in my face,” I commented. She just laughed and leaned into me.

“Well thanks anyway, it means a lot to me.” We continued on until finally we reached her place. She let out a happy, content, exhale then turned to me. “Thank you Mr. Burd-“ but I cut her off.

“Please… you’re embarrassing me. I’m no mister,” I said with a smile. “Just call me Burdy, or Evan. Either one is fine,” I told her with a smile.

“Well… thank you Evan. It’s very kind of you to walk me home like this,” she said and I returned her smile.

“No problem,” I said with a thumbs up. “You’re a pretty cool… for a teacher that’s hard to come by, I don’t mind walking yah home,” I said. I extended my hand for her to shake which she promptly did. “If Lassie’s any trouble tomorrow… you can always just send her home,” I laughed and Cheerilee giggled.

“Okay… Farewell for now Evan.” And she turned to make for the door but then stopped and spun around. “Oh, and that school picnic is near the end of June, probably on the last or second last day of school,” she informed me and I gave her a thumbs up.

“Oky-doky!” I said with a smile. She nodded then turned and opened her house door. I spun on the heels of my feet then started home. I felt… dammit, I felt all mushy and cuddly again… and for once, it felt pretty good…

Author's Note

Okay, sorry for being a bit late with releasing this. Last weekend I was helping my kid's (Guardian-ized child by law or whater) hleping his mom move a bunch of her dead mom's stuff. The U-haul van she called for didn't show up and she asked me if I could use Cadence to move some of the stuff. Funnier yet she thought it'd take eight or nine trips, took me four and she was all like "Oh my god... I'm so happy we got all that stuff and I never thought we'd be able to get it in four trips" and the whole time I was thinking "Yeah... cause you drive a stupid Hyundai"
Anyway, moral of the story: I need to get a tailgate sticker that says 'Yes this is my truck. No I won't help you move'
Have a good one, eh (Cause I'm Canadian right)

Chapter 35

‘Inner demons?…’

Burdy’s perspective…

I wasn’t sure what I was dreaming about… maybe nothing. I don’t remember, it was just black. My body stirred and I was awoken suddenly by a ghostly, most eerie windy howl. It was by no means loud, it was just there and barely audible.

I looked around my dark room. “Uhm… hello?” I asked unsurely, thinking perhaps it might be Lassie. Last I remembered, she was watching a late night horror, the cheesy kind, on the television.

A shiver went down my back and… I felt cold. I wasn’t sweating by any means, not even a drip, so I knew right away it wasn’t dampness or anything like that. The whistling howl returned, sending another shiver down my back. My view immediately turned to the origin…

I let out a relieved sigh. My window was open… that was all. My heart rate calming, along with my previously shaky breathing, I sat up and got off the bed. My feet touched the cold floor, causing me to curse under my breath. I jittered across the cold floor and to the window, closing it and turning back towards my bed.

I squinted my eyes but couldn’t see a thing. “Damn… it’s darker than normal in here,” I muttered. I tried navigating my way back to my bed but got lost along the way. I looked back to the window to try and triangulate my position to find my bed… but I couldn’t see the window anymore.

“Shit… Lassie! LASSIE CAN YOU COME DOWN HERE AND TURN ON A LIGHT?!” I yelled aloud, trying to wake her up. I stumbled along through the dark but I couldn’t even manage to find the wall light switch.

My heart rate began to pick up again. I didn’t like this. “Hello! Lassie!” I yelled. I stumbled across the room, but never once even staggered over weight training equipment or anything.

A ghastly voice hissed from behind me. I spun around. “Nothing can help you.” I gulped as I saw fiery, slanted red eyes, almost satanic. Tingly shivers rattled my body as I literally froze.

“Haa…uh… uhhhahh…” was all I managed in fear. Something about its gaze… I couldn’t even see its body. Just those goddess forsaken eyes… were enough to pin me in absolute fear.

A dark smog flowed across the ground as the darkness around me lit up with a dim red haze. I stepped back but reared up against my wall. I tried to run to one side but just tripped over… a desk I think.

I fell to the ground and began to yell and scream in fear. This was way outta my league. “Oh goddess… oh no… shit… SOMEPONY TURN ON A FUCKING LIGHT!” I screamed like a little filly.

The smog continued towards me, scaring me even further as the eyes began to seemingly float towards me. I ended up crawling into something hard, which stopped me in my tracks. The place lit up with a dark red ominous glow... like looking down and seeing the embers from the pits of hell itself.

My heart began to pump out of control as I started to whimper and whine, thrashing around to try and find my way to a light switch, or even just a door would do. The fog reached out with creepily long arms, that had sharp looking fingers on the ends.

It spoke out in a deep, hissing voice but what it was saying I couldn’t understand. My eyes went wide but just before the arms could reach me, a deafening roar echoed out. A massive bipedal mass slammed down in front of me, his hulking frame tensed up. "ARRRRRRG!"

He slouched his posture a bit and let out another terrifying, booming, roar that rang my ears. The dark smoggy creature tried to grasp him, but he charged forwards head on, right into the beast. However, due to its transparent body, the man went right through it.

He spun around and I saw the face of my fearless friend, Derreck. The smog creature turned to face Derreck. “Fool,” it hissed but Derreck opened his mouth wide, revealing a set of unnaturally long canine teeth, ones that looked less like a human’s and more like a wolf’s.

“I fear nothing!” he growled in a low rumbling tone, then charged it head on again, but this time an electrical aura surrounded his arms. The electrical aura was a deep hue of blue, coating the area with an illumination of the same color. He lunged and grabbed the beast by the throat, heaving it up off the ground with one hand. He cocked back his arm then spun in a one-eighty motion and slammed its foggy body into the ground, somehow managing to crush it into the ground.

He knelt down and began to slam his fists into it, roaring like a berserk animal all the while.

With a sudden movement however, the creature dissipated out from under him and arouse in a demonic form. Large pointy horns protruding from a ghastly looking face. It had rows of razor sharp teeth. Its lower body looked like something from a goat but the upper body looked like a troll or something. Its skin looked like it was leathery to the touch, but I didn’t want to find out.

Derreck tensed then pointed to the beast. “Come now! And face me!” he boomed. The creature and Derreck charged each other but as they collided, the creature vanished and appeared behind Derreck, delivering a cheap kick to the back of his head and sending him tumbling to the ground.

Within an instant, my friend was up and charged wildly at the creature, pummeling into the beast and driving its body into a wall with tremendous force. So much kinetic force had been exerted that a crater formed where its body had collided.

Derreck stepped back then hammered a punch into its head, knocking the creature’s head into the wall. As it fell forwards, he grabbed the beast and twirled it over his head, driving it head first into the ground.

A puff of fog fumed and the beast teleported over to the other side of the… wherever the hell this was. It huffed and snarled, hissing wildly at Derreck. “You fool… I! AM DERRECK! FUCKING! PARKER!” As he roared the ground beneath him seemed to push away, creating a crater beneath him. The tectonic pressure created small mountain looking formations all around.

I blinked and tried to find a light switch… anything. This was just too messed up. Just as he went to yell louder, my vision blurred and everything lit up…

* * *

I staggered around, the light blinding me along with the blurred vision from my damaged eye. “E-E-Evan?” stuttered a familiar voice. I turned to see my mother standing cautiously at the stairway.

I scurried over, still scrambling to try and get to my feet. “Quick, run it’s here!” I warned her.

“Wha-what’s here?” she stammered, looking into my room. I spun and pointed in a random direction. Not seeing anything I pointed to another direction.

“There… no there,” I said, pointing somewhere else. I blinked, pointing to yet another spot. Heart still racing and the foggy images from before staining themselves in my sight, I looked in sheer disbelief to my room, still thinking I was wherever I had been before. I still couldn’t see straight and kept breathing heavily as I pointed to my room.

“Evan… honey, are you alright?” Twilight asked and I kept looking, unsure about what to think. She stepped down the stairs and knelt down in front of me. “Sweetheart… I think you were having a nightmare,” she said and my breathing calm to a slow as I realized something more important than that.

I grabbed her and took her into a tight, loving hug. “You’re home!” I gasped and she was stunned at first from the hug, but then settled into me and returned the embrace.

“Well… yes… I just got home an hour ago but you were sleeping so I thought I’d leave you be. Sorry but… well, I’m not exactly sure what happened but the traffic out of Baltimare was brutal,” she said and I bit my lip. I wondered or not if she knew what Derreck, Lassie, Discord and I did.

I hugged her tightly. “I’m just glad you’re home, safe,” I said with a relieved sigh. She just rubbed my back.

“It’s okay… it’s okay…” she hummed to me, rocking me back and forth. I began to feel dreary and tired again. It was early I think… I couldn’t tell, my watch was over on the nightstand. “Sssh… hush now, let me take you to bed,” my mother said and gently, she grasped me in her magic and led me over to my bed. The last thing I really remembered was being tucked in to nice sheets, and her kissing me on the forehead before whispering that she loved me…

* * *

I awoke with a bit of a startle, mostly from the memories from earlier. I felt a presence beside me and quickly spun my head to see who it was. I was greatly relieved to see the purple alicorn lying beside me, snoozing peacefully.

I let out a few deep exhales and let my body settle back down into the bed as my mind remembered all that had happened last night… or maybe it was early this morning, I wasn’t sure.

I snuggled into my mother, gently nestling my face into her chest with a sigh as I held her. I was so happy she was alright.

As time passed by, the morning sun shone through my window and embraced the back of my neck with a hair prickling warm sensation. As I continued to lay awake, though dozing off from time to time, Twilight finally started to come around.

She opened her dazed eyes and blinked a few times before smiling. “Good morning,” she said through a morning yawn.

I gave her a peck on the nose. “Morning to you too,” I replied and she just grinned with a slight blush. To interrupt the moment however, my stomach grumbled. “Ugh…” I rolled over and grabbed my watch. It was nearly ten o’clock. I lay flat and flumped my head flat.

Twilight scooched over and lay one of her forelegs over my chest. “The other morning… before I left to Baltimare… I woke up and you weren’t home,” she began. “I was so afraid that maybe you… had left me,” she said but I shook my head.

“No, I would never even think about it. I was just… well…” I trailed off. She leaned up so we could be face to face then gasped.

“What happened to your eye?!... And your hair, it’s all grey!” she exclaimed and I just shrugged.

“Well… doctors say stress can cause grey hair… my eye… I uhm… something about getting water into my ant chamber or something,” I said, trying to keep what really happened a partial secret. I don’t know why I didn’t want her knowing, I just had a feeling was all.

“That’s awful. Is there anything they can do?” she asked and I looked to her with a raised brow.

“Anything who can do?” I asked, wondering who ‘they’ were.

“The doctors, the ones who told you what was wrong?” she asked and I just chuckled.

“Oh… the grey hair is something doctors back on my world say… the eye is something Discord told me,” to the last part, Twilight’s eyes went wide.

“Discord did this to you?!” she gasped but I shook my head.

“Oh, no-no… he just told me what had happened. Guess I shouldn’t have been playing around,” I told her and she looked with a worried gaze to my eyes.

“Does it hurt?” she asked but I just shook my head and grabbed my eye patch.

“No… but the entire left side of my vision is a blur unless I keep my eye closed, or covered,” I said and slipped on the eye patch. She just stared at me, namely at the eye patch. Stroking the sides of my hair, she sighed.

“Promise me to be more careful… I couldn’t bear to lose you,” she said and I nodded.

“Of course,” I said and leaned up to give her a kiss to the cheek. At the last moment, she moved her face slightly and connected our lips. I inhaled through my nose and we held the kiss for a few seconds before I pulled away.

“Evan… about the other night,” she brought up the topic I was kind of hoping to avoid.

“Yeah… I’m really sorry about that… I-I-I… I shouldn’t have done that,” I muttered disgracefully.

“Oh…” she sounded a little… saddened. I looked up to her.

“What’s wrong?” I asked but she just turned her head away.

“Nothing, it’s nothing,” she said but I could tell it was something because she was all happy a minute ago and now she wasn’t.

I tilted her chin towards me with my right hand. “Please… tell me, I want to know,” I said truthfully and with a heartwarming tone.

“Well… I was just going to say that…” she bit her lip. “I’m sorry that you didn’t like it,” she said, again, in a rather sad tone.

“Didn’t like what?” I asked.

“The other night… with us… I’m sorry,” she apologized. Wait?! She was apologizing to me?!

“Uhm… no really, I should be sorry. You were in heat and I know that estrus can do some funky things and make mares not think straight… and I really feel bad about taking advantage of you,” I apologized but she just shook her head with a somewhat stunned look.

“But I was thinking straight! Well… sort of. What I chose to do with you wasn’t entirely due to my estrus… it was very special to me…” she just trailed off with a sigh. “I just thought maybe… you would’ve liked it too.”

My eyes went wide… she wanted to do that?! “I… I…” I couldn’t get the words out. I couldn’t believe what I just heard either. “I did like it,” I blurted out, just trying to say something truthful to comfort her. She looked back to me, a little bit of blush on her cheeks.

“You… you did?” she asked, a hint of hope in her voice. I chuckled and rubbed the back of my neck.

“I uhh… yeah I did… I mean, it never crossed my mind to do that with you… and I kinda thought you’d be mad at me, that’s why I left in the morning… I was trying to think up a good excuse,” I told her. She smiled and gave me a kiss to the lips then pulled back, a thrilled look on her face.

“I’m glad. For a minute there, I thought maybe you didn’t want me,” she said then rubbed my cheek affectionately. “If it’s oka-“ but my stomach rumbling cut her short and she just giggled. “If it’s okay with you… I’d like to do it again sometime,” she said and my heart fluttered a bit.

The thought… was enticing, albeit strange, but right at this moment I was hungry. “Okay… we’ll uhh… can we get some breakfast though?” I asked and she giggled.

“Of course.”

We both got out of bed, and it was at that moment, I realized I was sporting a ragingly hard erection. “Shit,” I cursed under my breath as I wiggled into some dirty pants, namely the khaki dress pants from the day before. Twilight looked to me as I slipped on a stained V-neck t-shirt.

“I’m gone a whole three or four days and you haven’t even done one load of laundry?” she teased and I just rolled my eyes with a smile and chuckle.

“Yeah… a little busy,” I told her and she just smiled back. We both puttered upstairs and I was sort of half expecting Lassie to make some grand comment about something vulgarly sexual.

But, contrary to my belief, she wasn’t even here. Then I remembered, today she was gonna go tell more stories at the Ponyville public school. “Spike around?” I asked, wondering how he was doing.

“He offered to go gem hunting for Rarity. Somepony vandalized and burglarized her boutique while we were away! Can you believe that?! In Ponyville!” she stated and I secretly bit my lip.

I’d either have to help her rebuild the place… or find some way to pay her back. But I wouldn’t say anything until I figured out what to do.

The two of us proceeded into the kitchen. “So it’s just the two of us then?” I asked and she nodded. “Breakfast for two,” I said then opened the fridge. Before I could grab anything, the carton of orange juice floated out of the fridge, covered in Twilight’s purple magical aura.

I retrieved some oranges from the fridge and began to slice them up. Twilight on the other hand, set out the table and poured us both a glass of orange juice. I grabbed the cereal box of Fruity Hoops. It had been a little while since I had some cereal.

“Cereal?” I asked and she just looked to it.

“I’d rather something a little more…” she trailed off and a box of granola cereal, levitating it out from the cupboard. I went to the fridge and grabbed some milk while Twilight retrieved the bowls and spoons.

I took a seat and we shared breakfast together, sitting across from one another at the table. I looked to her. “You know… one of these days we all need to eat breakfast together as a family. We always seem to be missing somepony,” I commented.

She nodded and as we ate breakfast she looked to me. “I heard yelling last night. I wasn’t sure if it was you or not… who’s Derreck?” she asked and I just rubbed the back of my neck.

“Uhm… he’s my bes-“ I cut myself off. I wasn’t sure if he was my absolute best friend, but by god he made the top list. “One of my best friends,” I said and Twilight rose a brow.

“Is he… a pony or?...” she trailed off in wonder.

“He’s a human like me… sorta like me. He’s a really nice guy when you get to know him on good terms but…” I bit my lip and trailed off. “He’s really mean and snarly if you cross him, or try to hurt me. He considers me his only friend and I'm kinda like a brother to him so he’s really close,” I said.

She nodded. “Oh… I see… there was quite a bit of yelling,” she said and I nodded.

“It was a really wild dream… or whatever it was,” I mutter the last part under my breath. We continued to eat breakfast in mostly silence, just enjoying one another’s company.

As we finished, we simply set away the milk and orange juice, then set the dirty plates in the sink for later. Twilight looked to me. “So what do you want to do today?” she asked and I just shrugged slightly.

“Don’t know… I’ll just go with the flow,” I commented. I entered the living room and looked to the television. “TV?” I asked and she used her magic to flick on the tube, but as the TV turned on, Lassie’s pornographic channel from last night began to blare.

Crazy, funky music played while some mare took it from two stallion at the same time. As the camera view switched to her face, I realized it was actually three stallions, as she was sucking off another stallion that jerked his load into her face.

“AHH!” Twilight gasped in shock then quickly tried to switch to a different channel, but in her haste, merely turned up the volume. The screaming coming from the mare was really loud, especially at this volume level. Twilight finally managed to change the channel and lowered the volume.

The TV showed some mare with a heavily thick English accent narrating about debt crisis with coupled ponies and how it tore them apart. Then she explained how she was going to a home to help a couple out of their financial problems.

I just rolled my eyes. I suppose this was like Equestria’s version of ‘Til debt do us part’. However, despite my disliking for the show, both Twilight and I sat down to watch it. It was fairly interesting. A newly wedded couple who hadn’t even paid the loan for their wedding, also had a loan out for a new, swanky house and now they couldn’t even afford to pay for simple things like new furniture and appliances as they tried to pay off their loans.

We continued watching the show, and the whole time I was steadily annoyed by the mare’s ridiculous English accent. I mean… it sounded as if she was trying way too hard to sound British.

The camera zoomed to the couple’s face as the host spoke. “If you continue the way you are now… in a matter of a year, you will have no home, no money and you will be twenty… hundred… THOUSAND… bits in debt,” she said and Twilight’s jaw, along with the couple on the TV, went slack.

I just blinked. “So… is that like… two million or?” I asked and Twilight thought to herself.

“No… I think it’s two hundred thousand,” she replied and I just blinked.

“Yeah but… twenty hundred is two thousand and a thousand two thousands is two million…” I trailed off and we both thought about it.

“Yeah but I think that… uhm…” Twilight trailed off and I just shook my head.

I threw my hands up in a flabbergasted way. “Never mind… she can’t just say two million because that’d be too uncouth for her,” I joked and Twilight just closed her eyes as she stifled a short laugh.

She turned off the television and turned to me. “Well what about you?” she asked and I blinked.

“What about me?” I asked back.

“Oh, I don’t know… tell me something about yourself,” she said and I just shrugged.

“I’m in a world of talking ponies... with a loving mother and a talking dog,” I said and she just laughed.

“Well… that is a lot better perspective on life then when you first started off here… but how about you tell me something I don’t know?” She suggested.

“Well… I dunno. I milked cows and shot guns,” I said and Twilight rested her head against her hoof as she listened.

“Tell me about guns,” she said and I just went a little wide eyed.

“They’re dangerous, meant to kill… bad I suppose,” I said. Ha! Me, saying guns are bad… who would’ve thought. Never in a million years.

“Well… if they’re so bad, why does someone like you own them?” she asked curiously.

“I was a bad man before I came here,” I replied but she just shook her head gently.

“No… I think you were just confused and scared,” she said and I swallowed.

“I wasn’t scared,” I told her but she just smiled.

“Not like that kind of scared… I meant more like… unable to accept what was happening kind of scared,” she told me and I half nodded.

“Maybe… maybe that was it,” I said in admittance. Truth be told… I had come so far since I had first arrived. I really felt bad now, thinking back on it, about how I acted towards her, towards Spike... towards everypony really.

I looked her in the eyes. “I’m sorry… about how I acted when I first arrived… I was really rude to you guys and you didn’t deserve that, especially how you took me in,” I apologized and she smiled then leaned forwards and kissed me on the lips.

“It’s okay, at least you stuck around and are nicer now,” she replied back then sat down and rested her head on her hoof again. “So how do guns work?” she asked and my eyes went wide as I rubbed my forehead in thought. That could be a very long topic.

“They all work differently really… some are pump action, some are lever action, some are… well, there’s lots of different ways guns work. Some were even electrically driven,” I informed her.

She nodded. “Well… how about you tell me how the very basics work?” she asked and I rubbed my head.

“Well… uhm, usually there’s… want me to show you?” I asked and she smiled.

“Sure, I’d love to learn something new,” she replied and we walked outside to my truck. I opened one of the boxes and thought to myself. I grabbed a case with the label ‘Trillium’ and opened it.

Inside was a Mosin Nagant 91/30 PU sniper rifle. On the stock was a very basic rifle stock cartridge carrier, made out of compressive material. Pinned to the cartridge carrier was a dream catcher. I grabbed a live shell from the stock, along with the rifle then closed the toolbox.

“Okay, see this shiny piece?” I asked, pointing to the bolt action of the rifle, and she nodded. “Okay basically when you action it, like this-“ I racked the bolt back. “It cocks back a thing called a hammer,” I informed her and she nodded. "Now when you push this bolt back closed, usually it loads a bullet into the chamber, right here," I said, pointing to the inside chamber of the rifle. She nodded and I closed the action.

“Okay, now see this thing here?” I asked, tilting the rifle upside down and pointing to the trigger. She nodded. “This is called the trigger. Now when the operator pulls back on the trigger it releases the hammer,” I told her, then turned the rifle so she could see the bolt again.

“Now… inside this… bolt, there’s a thing called a firing pin. Basically it’s a little pointy rod. Anywho, when the hammer is released it slams forwards and into the back of the firing pin and the point…” I trailed off and showed her the underneath of the rifle cartridge.

“The point slams into this little circle thing here, see?” I told her, pointing to the primer. “Now, this little thing is actually a capsule, called a primer, which is some sort of pressure sensitive small explosive, that when the firing pin hits it, it'll lets off a small spark to the inside of the cartridge which…” I trailed off. “Hold on,” I told her and went to the passenger side of my truck, opening the door and rooting through the back of my truck, I searched for something that I could use.

I finally found a pair of pliers and pulled the bullet off the shell. Pouring the gritty powder into my palm, I showed it to her. “This is called gunpowder. It acts as the propellant. Basically, when the primer sends off that small spark, or mini explosion, it ignites this gunpowder which pushes against the back of the bullet.” I showed her the 185g full metal jacket round which she examined closely.

“That looks pretty small,” she said and I nodded.

“They are. Basically this bullet is a wee bit larger in diameter than the actual inside of the barrel,” I said standing the rifle straight up and showing her the bore of the rifle. “Okay, so the bullets where made a wee-tiny bit bigger so that they would contain all the compression behind them,” I told her.

And she nodded. “So… so that’s how they work?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Well… they all work differently. It's actually a little more complicated than that, but that’s the basic rundown… or at least that’s how I’ve always thought about it,” I told her and she nodded then looked to the case it came from.

“So this one is called a Trillium?” she asked and I just chuckled.

“No, that’s what I named her,” I said and she blinked.

“There’s genders?” she asked and I just giggled.

“No… not quite… I just call her Trillium because… well, just like how I call Cadence a she... just because,” I told her then looked to the old beat up rifle. “These rifles are really called Mosin Nagant, ninety-one thirty. And this particular rifle was suitable for snipers so it was outfitted with a scope, see?” I asked and pointed to the PU scope.

The scope, I will admit, was weird, awkward and had a strange optic configuration. I did at one point have the original scope that matched the rifle, but the scope was already broken when I bought it so I ended up getting a reproduction scope. The scope was mounted up high, so a nice cheek weld could never really be attained unless a cushion or something was put between the user’s cheek and stock to complete the gap. Added to the fact it had the reticle bars that never actually connected, the optical was very European esque.

Twilight looked over the rifle. “So… by operating that shiny bolt thing, you cock back that thing you called a hammer while at the same time loading a shell. Then when the trigger is pulled back, it releases the hammer, which strikes a firing pin, which ignites the circle thing called a primer, which ignites the gunpowder, which propels that small little bullet down the barrel…” she trailed off and looked at the gun with a still curious look.

“Yeah… and it has a really nasty bite. One of these little bullets, when shot from this gun, can hit with about… two thousand, six hundred and fifty foot pounds of force… or, hoof pounds of force,” I told her and her eyes went wide.

“Wow… that’s enough to kill somepony… oh, right…” she said, remembering that I told her these were intended to kill.

I nodded. “Yeah… they’re not exactly peaceful objects,” I told her and she nodded before taking a grasp of the rifle in her magic.

“Can I try it?” she asked and I blinked.

“Y-you… you wanna... try it?” I asked in a baffled way and she looked to me, nodding.

“Well, not to kill anything of course. I just want to see what it’s like,” she replied.

I blinked. “O-okay, well, let’s go somewhere a little less populated so that nopony gets hurt by accident,” I offered, stuffing Trillium back into her case, then helping Twilight into my truck.

I walked around and got into the truck. "Mmm... ohhh Cadence... baby," I cooed my truck as I caressed the steering wheel, licking the inside of wheel while stroking the bottom. I slipped the naughty key into her special spot, emitting a beep sound. "Naughty girl," I said in a Robert Muldoon voice. I then began trailing circles around the insert for the ignition with the key tip, almost as if I was teasing it in some way.

Finally I slid the key into the ignition and started the truck. Like always, she rumbled to life with that iconic diesel chug.

Twilight then asked me a question I really didn’t know the answer to. “Who invented guns? Back on your world I mean?” The question stumped me.

“I uhh… well… I don’t exactly know, but they say the Chinese invented gunpowder which they used in cannons… then to give the basic infantry better, far more adequate weaponry, armies around the world started shrinking the idea of cannons to more portable sizes. The first real firearms where simply addressed as cannons on a stick… which is pretty accurate. Basically it was a tiny cannon strapped to a stick, sometimes not even that, just a tiny handheld cannon of sorts,” I told her.

She nodded as I drove us out towards a more secluded pasture field, just outside the property of Sweet Apple Acres. I parked the truck and retrieved a few things from the back, namely a resting stand for the rifle, a pair of binoculars and some paper targets, but also something very special that I never thought I’d wear, at least not around other people, or ponies.

I took long strides and mentally visualized what I believed to be about one hundred yards, then nailed the paper target to a tree nearby. I quickly ran back and saw Twilight trying to look through the scope. “So how does this work? I understand how the other set of sights works but this… is weird,” she said.

“Okay, so the sights along the top of the barrel-“ but she cut me off.

“I know. You put that little post on the front inside the notch on the rear, then the top of the post is where the bullet should hit, right?” she asked and I blinked.

“Clever girl,” I commented and she smiled.

“But how in Equestria does this work?” she asked, pointing to the scope. "It's all black."

I set up the cushioned rifle rest, binoculars, my special item, and laid down, laying the rifle’s fore end on the rest. “Okay, if you look through this scope like this,” I said leaning my face closer to the scope, but not right up against it. “You’ll see three… stick looking things,” I told her, not wanting to have to explain what reticles where.

“The vertical one has a bit of a point on it. Where that point is, is where your bullet should hit,” I told her, letting her take grasp of the rifle. “Now there’s some things to know. First off, you can’t let any shadows be in you scope view,” I said and she looked to me.

“Well that’s impossible. Sunlight gives everything a shadow,” she said and I just chuckled.

“I meant… is there… a black shadow anywhere on the sides of the scope while you're looking through it?” I asked and she looked again.

“Sometimes… but it changes when I move my face around,” she replied.

“Okay, if you move you face closer, the shadows should shrink a bit, then move your head side to side to get rid of them.” I told her and she looked to me.

“Why?” she asked and I sighed.

“Because if there’s a shadow in your scope view, then your shot won’t hit where you’re aiming. It’s got something to do with line of sight opposed to the point of impact, just trust me,” I said, not sure exactly how it worked and not really wanting to explain in detail.

“Okay… now what?” she asked.

“Okay, now pull up on that bolt, and back,” I told her and she did as I asked. I loaded a single shot right into the chamber. “Okay, now push it all the way forwards, then down,” I told her and she did as I asked.

“Alright,” I said, then took hold of my special item. It was a Soviet-bloc, jet black ushanka, made of fish-fur. I slipped it on my head, just for nostalgic purposes. Derreck had given it to me, along with some other things, and said to always hang on to them.

“Okay, now look through the scope,” I said and she nodded. “Alright, now basically put the tip of that pointy stick on the target where you want to hit, and when you’re ready, gently squeeze back on the trigger,” I said and she bit her lower lip as she tried to steady the gun on the rest.

“It keeps moving... I mean, I keep moving... I can't keep it still enough to get it where I want,” she said and I nodded.

“I know. It’ll take a bit of practice. Try and relax, control your breathing to slow your heart rate. Just remember, don’t jerk or pull on the trigger, just a gentle squeeze. If you pull or jerk, that micro-movement will shift your aim slightly and your shot will be off,” I told her and she bit her lip.

“This sounds hard,” she replied back and I chuckled.

“Hey… being a sniper was never meant to be easy,” I said. “Just relax, it’s your first time so it’s okay if you’re not bang on,” I told her. She steadied the rifle as best she could.

“So the point is where my shot will go?” she asked and I nodded.

“Generally speaking… yeah,” I said then noticed she didn’t have the rifle butt snugged up to her shoulder. “Oh, and keep the stock of the rifle snug to your shoulder. It’ll kick a lot worse if you don’t,” I told her, pointing to the stock. She looked to the stock then snugged it up.

“Couldn’t you have told me that earlier? Now I lost my aim,” she replied and I just smiled.

“Better than feeling like yah just got kicked by a mule,” I joked. I looked at her, watching her as she controlled her breathing while looking through the scope, trying to keep her aim steady. She looked cute. I went to say something but before I did, she squeezed on the trigger.

KA-BOOM! The rifle shot shocked me a little and a brief image flashed in my head. A man with a bit of a beard, a black ushanka and a rifle just like Trillium, fired through a window in an old beat-up building.

The rifle jerked slightly against Twilight’s shoulder and she still lay there, barrel smoking. She turned and looked to me. “How’d I do?” she asked and I looked through the binoculars.

“Uhm…” I trailed off. With the 8x magnification, I couldn’t tell all that well.

“Horribly, wasn’t it?” she asked but I shook my head.

“I can’t tell actually, I wasn’t watching,” I replied and she gave me a frowny face.

“Why not? That was my first shot ever!” She complained and I just smiled.

“I meant to say I was watching you, not the target. You were really cute for a first timer,” I said with a wink and she just giggled slightly.

“Okay, but this time can you watch the target so I can see how I did?” she asked and I nodded.

“Okay, now just rack the bolt back again, but be careful of the shell when it’s ejected. They tend to be hot,” I warned and she did as I asked. This time however, I loaded five shots into the rifle’s magazine.

“Woah… five bullets can go into this gun?” She asked and I half nodded.

“Sort of. It’s called a magazine. It holds more shots. You can’t fire all five with one pull of the trigger, but with extra bullets, you can have quicker follow up shots than if you just had a single shot rifle,” I informed her.

She actioned the rifle closed then peered through the scope. I waited… and waited. KA-BOOM! Again an image flashed through my mind, but this one was longer.

The man from before pulled out a twin set of Soviet Tokarev pistols, on in each hand, and fired madly into a group of soldiers. I nearly gasped from the image as it dissipated as quickly as it came. Twilight spoke up. “How was that?” she asked and I looked through my binoculars.

“Not bad,” I lied. I had no idea where she hit, I couldn’t tell really tell from this far away with the magnification, and partly due to my distraction. I needed to see the impact. She racked the bolt and very calmly fired again.

KA-BOOM! A memory flashed as the big man fired a semiautomatic rifle, the SVT-40, in quick succession. The image was brief.

KA-BOOM! The man rushed over a trench, kicking another man in the face as he leapt down, then racked the bolt handle on a sub machine gun and fired wildly. The gun spat out lead at an impressive rate, with a very distinct chatter. The other men all fell before him

KA-BOOM! The man charged and stabbed a crude blade into the throat of a man then grabbed for the deceased man’s big machinegun.

KA-BOOM! The man slung the belt of ammo over his shoulder as he began to mow down an entire platoon of enemy soldiers. The distinct chatter of the machinegun was undeniable. It was Hitler’s buzz-saw.

I gasped, my head jerking upright and Twilight turned quickly to see what was the matter. “Are you okay?” She asked, frighteningly worried. I calmed my breathing. I had no idea why those… images… memories of sorts, were in my mind. I wasn’t even close to old enough to be involved in the Second World War.

“Fine, I just... uhh… nothing, it was nothing,” I said then stood up. “Let’s go see the damage,” I told her. We walked down to the target and took a look. Most of the shots missed completely, minus two, one of which Twilight gasped at.

“Why didn’t you tell me I hit a bull’s-eye?!” she interrogated, mostly out of joy.

“Well I… I didn’t know, from that range I couldn’t really tell,” I partially lied. It was kind of the truth. I wouldn’t have been able to tell she had hit a bull’s-eye, I would’ve only knew she very hit close.

“That was fun, can I do it again?” she asked hopefully and I nodded. We returned to our shooter’s perch and spent the better part of two hours laying there, her shooting the paper target and getting an enjoyable thrill from it. I watched from the binoculars, no longer plagued by the images and was able to tell her where she was hitting.

I smiled then placed the ushanka on her head, though it was mostly impeded by her horn. “Here, maybe you should wear this,” I offered.

She laughed then took the hat and looked at the symbol. “What does this mean?” she asked, pointing at the iconic Soviet symbol.

“Well… the sickle and hammer were meant to represent the union of peasants and labourers. The hammer for labourers and sickle for peasants. The red star meant union under communism,” I told her and she looked at me curiously.

“Communism was the ideal that… everyone was equal and worked for what they needed,” I said bluntly.

“Oh… kinda like Equestria?” she asked, not understanding what I meant. I nearly laughed.

“No, not at all… see the original idea was that… everyone was on an equal level with everyone else. Everyone believed the same thing, everyone had the same things, no one was more, no one was less. You gave to the community and in return got what you needed to live,” I told her and she blinked.

“So who ran the place? If everyone was equal then…” she trailed off and I bit my lip.

“See that’s where it kind of gets difficult. Even though the original idea sounded great, there were problems because a government needs a leader, a leader needs subordinates and like nearly all leaders back on my world… power makes you corrupt and destroys you,” I said and she blinked.

“So it was bad?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“Well… that depends on who you ask. If it was ever done right, communism was good for those who were poor to begin with. They were finally entitled to the sweat on their back. It was a godsend so to speak. For the rich and powerful, it was bad because they became equal with everyone else. The problem was that communism forced equality and my species has a thing... something, I don't know what. Nearly everyone wants more than the person next to them. They strive to have more, they'll even kill to get it,” I said and she frowned.

“That sounds selfish of them,” she stated and I nodded.

“Yeah, but I came from a selfish world,” I replied.

“So… were you communism?” she asked, still unsure about how it worked.

“No…” I trailed off and thought about it. Canada technically ran under a Monarchy system which, in Canada's instance wasn't so bad but the ideals of Monarchy to me was a little far fetched. All Monarchy was to me, was a dictatorship where the dictator smiled, and it was run by a bunch of rich assholes who did whatever the damn hell they pleased and got away with it. “I came from Monarchy,” I said and Twilight’s ears perked.

“Ooh! That’s like Equestria, where a family-“ but I cut her off.

“It was worse than Equestria. We had a rich bunch of-“ I cut myself off and sighed. “A rich family that did whatever they wanted because they descended from greatness. They just kinda strolled around and were like 'Hey everybody, we're having a royal baby, so make a fuss over us',” I said and she blinked. “See… back on my world, when you’re rich and powerful, you’d hate to lose it, that’s partly why Monarchy opposed communism, they’d lose their wealth. Whereas the poorer people in Monarchy where brainwashed with propaganda so that they believed communism was terrible and such…” I just sighed and rolled onto my back, looking to the sky.

Twilight set down the rifle and hat then laid on my chest. “What did you believe was better? Which was better?” she asked and I just rolled my eyes.

“Both didn’t work in their own ways. With communism, once someone reached power, they forgot about the people and only cared about their own wealth. With monarchy, the family in power just didn’t really give a shit about the individual people at the bottom to begin with, as long as their country in full kept thriving. With communism... the problem was that they forced equality, taking away people's property and re-distributing it, which of course led to a revolution which led to a civil war... so on and so forth,” I told her and she gave me a still wondering look. “My species was doomed to begin with,” I said then let out a sigh.

“So if it was so bad, why were you always trying to go back home?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“That was the world I grew up in. It was what I knew… how I lived,” I told her and she sighed then stroked some hair away from my face before planting a kiss on my lips.

“Well, I’m just glad you’re here with me,” she told me and I kiss her back. I lay there and she kissed me again, which I returned. Feeling a little cheeky however, I tickled the space between her wings, getting a gasp from her as her wings sprang out.

“Tickles?” I laughed and she nestled her muzzle into the side of my neck, licking me gently and getting a squeaky peep from me. “AHH!” I gasped as I nearly jumped.

“Tickles,” she said, starting to play with my sides. I gave gentle stroke to the undersides of her wing and she squirmed with slight peeps. “Hey!” She laughed, her wings twitching.

We began rolling around, tickling each other playfully. I rolled on top of her, panting heavily and stopped tickling her for a moment then simply looked into her sparkling eyes as she lay beneath me.

“What?” she asked, gleaming at me with a sparkling aura of beauty.

“You’re… you’re beautiful,” I said and she looked away bashfully, blushing. I felt like an idiot, saying that to my mom but… well it was true.

She grabbed my head and pulled it down. “Come here, yah big lug,” she said, then gave me a long passionate kiss. Slowly, as we kissed, our lips unsealed and our tongues began to dance together. It was still a bit weird… making out with a pony, my mother no less.

We began to move around and rolled a bit on the ground, our lips never once leaving one another. Finally she pulled away for a deep breath of air. My hands played with the undersides of her soft, fluffy wings. She giggled and squirmed a bit.

“Have you ever heard of preening?” she asked and I scratched my head.

“No… not really,” I replied.

“You’re doing it right now… and it feels really good. It’s the cleaning and straightening of feathers… ooh… wow. Hold on,” she said then got off me and laid flat on her belly. “Can you do that some more?” she asked. I obliged and began to stroke and caress her wings, trying to straighten and smooth her feathers as best I could.

She lay there, moaning to herself as I preened her wings. There were new things I was learning all the time. With a relieved sigh she quickly tucked in her wings then rolled over, taking me with her and pinning me under her.

“For a first timer… you’re pretty good,” she said in a wildly seductive voice. I just blinked.

“I guess some of us are just naturals,” I replied, partially complimenting her shooting earlier.

“Hmm… maybe,” she said and I felt my belt get magically flicked off, along with my pants getting tugged off.

“Mom… uhm… should we… really?” I asked. I wasn’t sure about this. I mean… yeah I loved her, but…

As my boxers were pulled off and her magical aura grasped my erecting cock, she changed my mind pretty quick. ‘Dammit… stupid urges,’ I thought to myself. She began stroking me, first slowly, and then picked up the pace.

It felt so different than actual flesh. It had a mystic feeling that was neither cold, nor warm. I just bit my lip and squirmed beneath her, completely at her whim. “Somebody seems to enjoy it?” she teased and my legs stiffened as I twitched around on the ground.

She lowered her body closer to mine and I felt her soft, fleshy entrance touch the tip of my shaft. We both gasped from the feel of that special kind of contact. I was held still by the anticipation of it. I couldn’t remember all that much from the time before, I wasn’t thinking straight then.

She slowly lowered herself onto me. We both gasped loudly, the penetration alone was enough to nearly make me blow my load. “Oh… ooh… oh goddess,” I gasped and she looked to me with a warm smile.

“You don’t feel… ashamed or anything… do you?” she asked. Hardly a time to ask now that we were already having sex. I shook my head.

“As long as you’re… okay with it,” I said through a pleasured grunt. She began to slowly rock her hips into mine, and I followed suit, though due to my lack of experience I couldn’t really synchronize with her very well.

My hands trembled slightly as I stroked up and down her sides. Her wings flared out and flapped a little, pushing down the grass beneath us. Due to the way ponies hindleg knees differed from a human’s she wasn’t actually sitting on her knees, but rather on her haunches, and her full weight rode directly on top of my lap as she rode my cock for all it was worth.

It felt strange really. The feel of her fur was so… exhilarating. Her insides were so warm... slick... wet. My hands stroked down to her sides, smoothing out her fur as they passed along. I looked down to where all the magic was happening and my insides felt all tingly as I watched my erection pump in and out of her slit, a slucking sound matching my pace each time I drove into her.

The image alone made my cock twitch a bit and Twilight blinked. “Did you just…” she trailed off wonderingly. I shook my head.

“No… I just… it feels really good,” I replied back. I looked up, her body above mine. Her body was so… so beautiful. I never really took time to truly admire it, but then again, her being my mother, I shouldn’t really have been looking at her in that way.

Twilight’s body leaned back as she straddled me harder, he moans louder than before. A thought picked up, and one that I couldn’t confirm nor deny due to the tall grass blocking my view. What if somepony was watching?

The thought quickly escaped my mind as more pleasure began to build up inside me. I grabbed her hips and began to guide our motions together a little better, further ramping up the intensity for both of us. Her insides snugged warmly around my cock, the feel of her insides being stroked against my manhood was unimaginable.

Her head flicked back, he mane whooshing as she did so. The sight was one of true spectacle. Her moans were angelic, heavenly… it made my heart flutter. My hands moved slightly from her hips and I began playing with her teats.

As I played with the nipples, her moans changed tunes and she rocked her hips harder into me, which I matched as best I could. Without real warning other than her audibly louder moans, she began erratic and jerky movements, her pussy tightening around my shaft that was still lodged inside of her.

“Oh… oh goddess… ooohhh!” Twilight moaned as her wings spasmed out, straightening to their full length and flapping wildly. I slowed my own thrusts and let her ride this out.

She lurched forwards, eyes closed as her breathing became shallow. Her right side jerking, she ended up falling off from her perch. I blinked as one of her hindlegs kicked in a jerky fashion.

“Uhm… mom?! Are you okay?” I gasped worriedly. I didn’t read much about female orgasms but… I had never really heard about this happening before… then again I had never really heard much about alicorn orgasms either so…

After a moment, she calmed down. “I’m sorry… I just… I just…” she tried to catch her breath and explain. I simply planted a passionate kiss on her lips.

“It’s okay, I don’t think you did anything wrong. I was just worried you might be in some kind of trouble.” She stroked the side of my face.

“Thank you. I know you might think it’s a bit strange, but really this isn’t,” she told me.

‘Ha! Isn’t strange having sex with your mother. Now this world truly is messed up!’ I thought to myself as I leaned my face into her hoof. “Can I…” I bit my lip and trailed off, wondering if she’d let me finish.

She squirmed under me and spread her legs wide. “Only if you can make me feel that good again,” she said with a seductive wink, and a hue of blush. I nodded and lined myself up with her. She went to say something but was cut off by her own pleasured moan as I rocked myself into her.

Her pussy was wet and slick, resulting in nearly no resistance whatsoever as I penetrated her. I gasped, shutting my eyes and dipping my head as I drove myself as far as my length would go.

I let out a pleasured exhale and looked to Twilight. Her cheeks were cherry red, and she was nibbling on part of her lower lip to try and conceal her moans. I kissed the side of her neck then gave a single, gentle thrust.

“Let it out. I want to hear you,” I told her then nibbled on the tip of her ear. I began to pump my hips, and with that she began to go all out. I swear… if Applejack was working today, she could probably hear us.

I placed my hands at her sides and began to thrust, each time trying to push myself further inside of her. Her insides kept massaging my cock, adding to the overall pleasure I felt. The slucking sound that was produced from my shaft driving into her slit was drowned out, nearly entirely, by our combined moaning.

I looked down to see my cock slipping in and out of her. Marecum oozed out of her, along with vaginal fluids that dampened the fur around her nether region, along with spots along my legs and all over my groin.

I gulped. This feeling… it was a guilty pleasure. Having only had sex with her once before… I think I was hooked… no, I knew I was hooked. Twilight leaned up, eyes gently closing, and I followed suit.

Our lips connected, our moans of pleasure going down the other’s throat as our tongues danced together inside our combined mouths. As we continued to rut she pulled her head back, nearly reaching her peak. She drove her hips into me in an erratic way, one I couldn’t match.

Inside, I felt myself building up and felt a little saddened really. I kinda wanted to keep doing this and I knew once I was done I’d be tired. She began to whine, cooing out pleasured high notes. As I neared my own point, her wings flared out, flapping wildly and once or twice slapping me in the face.

I didn’t bother, merely giggling slightly. Her insides hugged me aggressively, squeezing down with a pleasurable force that was too much to handle. I gasped with a shallow grunt and jerked, blowing my load without much warning.

I took a shallow breath and shoved my cock in her as far as it would go, dumping my entire load into her needy pussy, which milked me for every last drop, not letting out a single drip.

After several moments, my cock stopped twitching but her pussy kept massaging my still erect dick. “Mmm… that was wonderful,” she told me, her wings slowly wrapping themselves around my back and keeping us united as I began to become flaccid.

I leaned into her, making sure not to put too much of my body weight on her as I relaxed. “I love you mom… a lot,” I said and she nodded with a giggle.

“I know. You never pulled out,” she mentioned and I just sighed.

“It felt too good,” I told her. She nestled her cheek into mine and I rolled onto my side. “You know… I’m not really exhausted but… I’m a bit tired,” I said. It felt different then exhaustion from physical labor in the manner that my body itself didn’t crave the need to sleep… my mind was just drowsy.

She snuggled up close to me. “I love you sweetie,” she whispered and I nodded back, giving her a rather sloppy kiss that I didn’t really aim.

“Just remind me… that when we wake up, I have to clean my gun,” I whispered and she giggled.

“Which one?”

* * *

Hours later…

We returned home shortly after I had shown Twilight how to clean the simplistic rifle. It made me laugh a little on the inside. Despite the violent and deadly nature of the rifle, not only did Twilight show interest in the subject, but once she watched me do it, she showed profession in the skill. Maybe that’s why she was Celestia’s star pupil, quick learner.

We entered the library, walking in each other’s embrace when suddenly an annoyed voice caught us off guard. “Where were you?!” Lassie yelled in an interrogative way as she rushed over to us.

Twilight answered. “Just out enjoying the sights,” she replied and Lassie’s nose twitched.

“No! You were not just out and enjoying the sights. You were out shooting a gun and enjoying each other’s genatalia!” She yelled like a bratty little kid. “While I was stuck here starving because there’s no food!”

I chuckled and Lassie looked to me. “WHAT?! IT’S NOT FUNNY! You can’t just starve your pet! Even Owlowiscious agrees! Isn't that right my minion?” she asked and the owl just blinked. “If he could talk he’d say yes.”

Twilight just looked at her pet. “Actually, he looks rather content-” she stated but Lassie interrupted her before she could continue.

“Ah-ah-ah-AHH! NO! We’re starving. There’s nothing to eat!” She cried. I just face-palmed and walked into the kitchen. Opening the fridge, I looked to all the food.

“There’s apples, oranges, grapes, eggs-“ but Lassie cut me off.

“There’s nothing to make lasagna!” she interrupted and I just dipped my head. I was going to say something then just didn’t. I simply nodded.

Twilight looked to Lassie and spoke. “You know Lassie, you’re acting a little spoiled right now.” Lassie just looked at her in a quizzical way.

“Do you like eating leaves off trees when you could be eating a fresh cooked meal?” she asked and Twilight just blinked. “Exactly. Yes, I could have eaten…” she trailed off and looked into the fridge. “Grapes and an orange…” she looked back to Twilight. “But I want lasagna. And besides, that theatre we went to before is offering a free lasagna with a purchase to that new horror flick ‘Draculetta’,” she informed us. “And the movie starts in like… twenty minutes!” She sat on her haunches and gave me a look. A gaze with wide, gleamingly tearful puppy dog eyes.

I simply chuckled. Oh… she had her ways that was for sure. I procured fifty bits for Lassie. “This enough?” I asked and she nodded with a smile before hopping up to her hindlegs and planting a kiss on my cheek.

“Thanksloveyoubye!” She said in a hurry before rushing off. I let out a sigh.

“I know… I spoil her rotten,” I said, knowing exactly what Twilight was thinking. We both wandered back into the living room where Owlowiscious fluttered down and handed Twilight a note.

“It’s from Spike. He wrote that he won’t be home until late. Rarity needs some extra help with collecting enough things to compensate for the robbery,” she said. At that moment, my heart sank.

“Hey… uhm… I’m just gonna go for a walk. Take a stroll through town. Relax a little,” I said, giving my mom a sweet kiss to the cheek before walking off. As I began through the streets of Ponyville, I wondered to myself what I was going to tell Rarity, how I’d approach this and such. I didn’t really make my way towards the boutique, rather I mingled through the streets and avoided it.

I scratched my head, trying to make up an excuse. I could come out and tell her the truth, but if she didn’t like it, then told somepony then I’d be in double trouble. “Haaaa…ahhhh…” I let out a deep sigh.

I turned down a dark alleyway. It was getting late in the day. Not many ponies were out and about. As I strolled along, I brought my right hand up to my face and caressed my nose. Suddenly a tingly feeling went down the back of my neck.

I stopped and turned to look down the alleyway. It looked dark… luminous… eerie. A wrapper of garbage floated along. The screeching hiss of a cat, followed by the crashing sound of a metal garbage can echoed. My senses flared to full alert, tingly feelings shivering my spine.

From the corner of my vision, I saw the shadow of a figure lunge at me. My right arm shot straight up, letting the arm come underneath my chest rather than around my neck like it originally would have.
My left arm instinctively grabbed the forearm and yanked it to my far left. I felt the body tumble a bit and I swiveled my stance, yanking the arm further to the left and sticking out my right foot a bit to trip the perpetrator.

As the pony fell I grabbed at the throat and gripped tightly, then took a kneeling position over it, driving my right knee into its chest. As the perp hit his or her back off the ground, I pulled the arm I still had in my left grip over my knee, bending at the elbow joint.

Incapacitated, the perp squirmed beneath me and I finally had a moment to take a look. It was a mare. She had light golden fur and a multi-colored grey mane…

“DARING!...”

Author's Note

Now before anyone flips shit thinking I'm a commie, I'm not. I mean, yeah... the ideology of communism in my mind... technically it works, but again, power destroys people so it's never more than a theory. But on the flip side, I'm not much of a monarchy loyal kind of person, I'm more towards democracy but again, with today's politics it just seems like some dudes trying to take away people's rights and that to me is kinda like dictatorship just not as extreme (I know, I'm kinda acting whiny right now compared to my usual jar-headed-ness)
So, as always, cheers to all you guys and gals out there, and for those that have to go back to school... you have my sympathy, and know that you have courage to face the very thing that still gives me nightmares to this day.

Chapter 36

‘That’s a bucking idiotic idea!...’

She squirmed beneath me, unable to escape my hold. She quickly began tapping out against my arm, gasping the words ‘I give! I give!’

I released her and had an urge to spit in her face. “What the hell do you want?!” I snarled and she blinked.

“Sweet Celestia…” she choked slightly and rubbed her somewhat sore neck. “What’s with the…ack… hostility?” she coughed and I gave her a cold glare.

“You damn well know why, you two timing…” I cut myself off and bit my lip. I wanted to call her a bitch… a cunt… jeeze, I never thought I’d have to face her ever again.

“Hey… woah, what’s the deal?” she asked, completely shocked at how I was acting.

“Dunno… maybe it’s the fact that you just tried to put me in a choke hold… or maybe the fact that after I saved your life twice, you still had the audacity to portray me in your story as an incompetent ape that out of its own greed ended up killing itself,” I snarled and she blinked.

“What?” she asked, almost as if she didn’t know.

“You damn well know what. I’m not stupid. I know that ape in the story you wrote about our adventure was-“ but she cut me off.

“Woah-woah-woah… WOAH!” she exclaimed. “For the record… I don’t write those stories. You remember Mrs. Applenathy?” she asked and I thought back.

“Yeah… the old mare running the museum?” I replied and she nodded.

“Yeah. I give her the rundown of what happened, sometimes a script to follow, and she writes and publishes the stories. Makes extra money on the side and that’s partially why I get a hefty paycheck,” she informed me and I scoffed at her.

“Oh let me guess. More lies? Yeah sure Daring, just sick me on an old mare… real fuckin’ nice a yah.” I curled my upper lip in anger, revealing my vicious canine teeth.

“Hey! Woah… chill the hay out. I’m serious. I don’t have enough time to write stories about my adventures… hay, I wouldn’t even want to. I might make a slip-up in one of my stories and reveal something personal about myself. Something the black-market bosses could use to hunt me down and find me,” she stated and I just furrowed my brows in anger. Goddess damn she was good at this game, but I somehow knew… or was just really damn sure, that she was still lying.

She just rolled her eyes and let out a deep and somewhat irritated sigh. “Fine, you know what. I’ll prove it to you. After we’re done, I’ll let you talk to Mrs. Applenathy about it,” she said and I was taken aback.

“When we’re done? What the hell did we start?” I asked and she facehoofed in embarrassment, having obviously gotten ahead of herself.

“Oh, sorry. Let me start over… how have you been-“ but I cut her short.

“Cut the crap Daring. We’re not friends. What the hell do you want, and why the hell did you try to put me in a choke hold?” I said rather aggressively.

“Okay… actually I was gonna give you a kiss and try to lighten you up before I asked,” she said and I looked at her seriously.

“Ask what?”

“Will you come on an adventure with me?” she asked, somewhat desperately. It wasn’t in her body language… but in her eyes.

“No… I don’t feel like being the design for your next bad guy,” I said and went to leave.

“Wait, please!” she pleaded back and just… I dunno, something in her voice made me stop.

“I thought you worked alone?” I quipped at her and she bit her lip and let out a defeated exhale.

“I need help… more specifically, your help,” she admitted and I rose an eyebrow. Huh… never figured her to admit defeat like that. “Listen, I didn’t write that story, just the outline and… okay I’ll admit it, I kinda made it look like you were a bad guy in the way I described you, but I’m really sorry,” she apologized.

“You're sorry now that you need something from me, right? Cause I haven't seen a hair of you since the last time we saw each other,” I challenged and she sighed.

“I didn’t read the story. I never really do. They’re usually exaggerated. But right now I need you… us, to put aside our differences and tackle this adventure,” she told me and I rubbed my chin. Maybe it wouldn’t be that bad. Maybe it would be easy.

“Okay… what’s the deal?” I asked.

“We’re gonna climb Mount Tia!” she exclaimed in a very excited voice.

“Mount… Tia?” I asked.

“Yeah. Tallest summit on the planet. Nopony has ever made it to the top before. But-“ I cut her short.

“WOAH! FUCK THAT!” I yelled. “No way in hell I’m gonna-“ but she cut me off.

“No listen, seriously we can-“
“No, ‘we’ are not doing it. Namely ‘I’ am not doing that. Fuck un-climbable mountains, fuck being a guinea pig, fuck that, fuck you!” I told her and she sighed.

“I didn’t say it was un-climbable.”

“You just said nopony has ever climbed it!”

“Exactly!” she exclaimed and I blinked. There was a pause. “Say that again Mr. Genius.”

“You just said nopony has ever climbed it,” I repeated, trying to think about what she was hinting at.

“Duh! No… ‘pony’ has ever climbed it. Dragons have ascended to the summit before. That’s partially what we’re after,” she said and I blinked.

“A dragon?” I asked and she gave a so-so nod.

“Apparently there’s this ancient war relic, from even before the formation of Equestria. It’s called ‘The Dragon Horn’. Apparently it’s at the summit peak. The museum said they’d pay us a hundred thousand each if we got it! A hundred thousand!” she exclaimed and I just blinked.

“That still doesn’t solve our first problem… how the fuck do we get it? Why don’t you just fly up there?” I asked.

“Because it can get as cold as a sixty below, so all that gear to keep me warm weighs me down. Ontop of that, the altitude is so high that my wings can’t generate enough force against the thin air to keep me afloat. Even some young dragons have trouble flying at heights about five thousand meters,”

I blinked. “How… high up is the… peak?” I asked and she just shrugged.

“Nopony knows. Some say about eight kilometers, some say nine… others think it’s absurd like… ten and a half,” my gut sank as my spine shivered.

“Fuck that… no fuckin way… that’s too sketchy,” I said and she gave me a love tap to the side.

“Aww come on, yah big wussy. Besides, you got an advantage over the legend that I don’t,” she commented and I looked at her.

“And what’s that?” I asked in a deep rumbly voice.

“You’re not a pony,” she said with a bright smile.

“Oh cause that makes me feel sooo much better. You're not a pony so you should be able to climb this. Man, this is a frickin suicide mission… times like a hundred,” I stated and she just laughed and flung her hoof.

“Oh come on. This’ll probably be easier than getting Peg Leg’s gold,” she commented but I shook my head.

“No deal. Why not just find a dragon to get it,” I replied but she looked at me like I was crazy.

“Are you nuts? If a dragon found out how much that thing is worth, he’d end up hoarding it,” she stated and I just huffed.

“Well… if you can't climb it just cause you're a pony, why not just get a mule… or a zebra, or a gryphon!” I announced and she just bit her lip.

“Because… because I know you can do it okay… because I’ve seen what you can do,” she told me and I rolled my eyes.

“Why not just send out a ‘Help wanted’ add in the newspaper?” I offered coyly, knowing the obvious answer.

“I can’t… I need someone good. I know that you’re in physical shape… that you can handle your own if need be…” she trailed off. “What do you want me to do? Get on my knees and beg? Don’t try and play with my pride!” she shouted and I just rolled my eyes.

“No… I just don’t want to do this. I don’t want to climb some goddess forsaken fucking un-climbable rock in some diluted fantasy of reaching the top, then descending back down safely with this treasure. A treasure that may not even exist… I don’t feel like risking my life for that,” I said and she stomped her hoof.

“What do you want me to do? Say I’m sorry? Make you the hero in the next book? What?!” She said, almost like it was easy. Out of the corner of my peripheral vision, I caught sight of Rarity and slunk into the shadows slightly.

Daring looked out and followed my gaze. “I can try and set up a date between you and her, alone in one of Canterlot’s finest restaurants, just you and her,” she offered, getting the wrong idea.

“I don’t have a crush on her… I kinda… sorta broke into her place and trashed it… now I’m trying to find a way to apologize… and get enough money to pay her back,” I said honestly. I should have, however, not mentioned that, because it gave Daring fuel.

“Hey! Perfect! You'll get paid a pant-ton for this then you can just pay her back!” My stomach sank. Oh goddess… she was right. But… was it really worth it? For me to risk my life like this just to pay her back for something that might only be worth a few hundred, maybe thousand, bits?

My heart skipped a beat. I had broken and entered… vandalized, in a way... and robbed her while she was away… I bit my lip. “A hundred and fifty,” I said, somewhat selfishly.

“What?” Daring asked, unsure about what I meant.

“I want a hundred and fifty thousand,” I informed her and her eyes went wide.

“Wait! Hold on, the museum can only afford to pay us each a hundred,” she said and I nodded.

“So you give me half of yours,” I said and she was taken aback.

“What?!”

“Well… you want me to play guinea pig, try and climb an un-climbable mountain just cause I’m not a pony… give me half of your salary over top of mine.” She blinked in astonishment. I guess she never expected this outcome.

“B-b-but… but I-“ I cut her off.

“Hey… let’s say the repair bill and the bill to replace all the merchandise I destroyed comes to about eighty large… I still want quite a fair bit of pocket change left over,” I exaggerated. I doubted it’d be anywhere close to that much for everything, but hey… what’s my life worth to Daring?

“It couldn’t cost that much!” she challenged my bluff.

“Fine, I know a gal who’ll help me. Hue Heifer. I’m one of her V.I.P.s. I helped her write the one story ‘Passions of friendship’,” I partially lied. I had no idea if she had actually wrote that or if she was just sloshed.

“You… you know Hue?” she asked and I nodded.

“Yeah… so uhh, good luck Daring. Maybe I’ll read an article about a great and daring adventurer that froze to death trying to reach the peak of a mountain,” I snarked and she immediately called out.

“OKAY WAIT!...” She trailed off and I could tell she wasn’t happy. “Alright… a hundred and fifty… okay, does that make you happy?” she asked and I nodded.

If I was gonna agree to this, I couldn’t let mom know. I just knew she wouldn’t let me do it. I hated going behind her back like this but I needed to pay back Rarity for what Derreck got us into.

“Alright Daring… but there’s some ponies we have to see first…”

* * *

Hours later,

Desert garage…

It would’ve been quicker and more convenient to have taken Cadence, but I had two problems. Firstly, Daring wasn’t supposed to exist outside her stories so we’d have a troublesome time trying to make her a disguise, either that or my mom would think she’s a fan filly. My second problem was just that. My mother. Not only would she most likely not let me go, but if I had to explain why I was going, then she’d find out about Baltimare, and subsequently; Manehatten.

Flim and Flam were mind blown by our… by Daring’s, idea. “Th-th-tha-that’s insanity. It’d never work. You’ll both die for Celestia’s sake!” Flim gasped. Flam chimed in.

“Why yes! The last expedition team vanished without a trace. Not a single member returned! Why, they're leader was well trained for that exploration and-” Flam stated and Daring’s ears perked up.

“Sir Archimedes II… one of the most daring adventurers ever. Philanthropist on his spare time. His journal kept all his most valued secrets. It would be a highly prized museum item, had he not taken it along with him…” Daring trailed off with a faint smile on her face.

“Somepony’s a fan-filly.” I muttered and she looked to me with the still faint smile.

“Everypony has their idol,” she commented and I just smiled. 'Arnold Schwarzenegger'

Flim just shook his head. “No way! No how! This is blasphemy! Insanity! Madness!” He commented and I rose an eyebrow. I would’ve quipped something about Sparta but this was too serious.

“Listen Flam… Flim. It’d be easy, kind of. We’d just take Juggernaut to the old base camp at twenty five hundred meters. Then hike most of it. The angle of elevation isn’t that bad according to the reports. The hardest ascent would be the last…” I trailed off and let Daring pick up.

“It’s believed only the last two and a half thousand meters is a steep climb.”

Flim scoffed. “Yes, but the key word is ‘assumed’, meaning nopony actually knows. The clouds are too thick and nopony can actually see the top… the dragons would be able to survey it for us, if they weren’t so selfish about it.” Huh… funny, I never really took him for a geographical caring kind of pony. Who cares what the unreachable places look like.

I scratched the back of my head. “Listen guys… you made things right with me by letting me take Juggernaut before she was done… you gave me gear to help with Baltimare-“ Daring cut me short.

“You went to Baltimare?! As in, during that freeze scare?!” She gasped but I paid her no mind.

“I know you’re always looking to set an even score between us but please… I’m asking… begging you guys… help me out, in my time of need,” I pleaded.

Daring muttered under her breath, still thinking about Baltimare. “Fine… I’ll take that as a yes. Guess my question isn’t important enough.”

Flim sighed while Flam followed shortly after. “Help you out? In a time of need? What are you looking to achieve? Death? What sort of pony needs death so badly they’ll beg for it? You didn’t strike me as a depressed suicidal pony… err, person,” Flim stated, trotting back over to Juggernaut and stroking his hoof along her side.

Flam walked along with his brother. “We’ve been through some hard times-“ I cut them short.

“We… as in us? I don’t know times we've-“ but Flim cut me short.

“Don’t interrupt,” he whispered. I nodded and Flam began again.

“We’ve been through some hard times… some rough times I’m sure,” he began a saddened musical tune which Flim added to.

“The wall before us we must climb… for it is the one of friendship and love,” Flim sung. I groaned inwardly as I covered my face in embarrassment, briefly peeking through the slits between my fingers. The words to their chorus didn’t even rhyme. They just played in tune with the musical beat they had going on.

I stood and was punished for about two minutes, just barely able to stand the musical song. It was so… I don’t know… ridiculous. I mean… could they not just get to the point without the loony song?

Flim and Flam both ended the note, each brother scooting up on one side of me and singing in unison. “THAT’S WHY YOU’RE OUR… FRIIIIIEEEEENNND!” I let out an exhale through my nostrils while I scrunched my nose, clenching my eye shut in sheer… I don’t even know how I felt, I just felt mentally damaged.

Flim and Flam stepped back, teary eyed and both with a handkerchief. “Y-y-you see… we’ve never... ever…” Flim began to get choked up on his words and Flam offered him his handkerchief which he blew his nose into.

Flam picked up where his brother left off. “Never had friends before… a-and… and if you… if you…” he too got choked up and blew his nose into Flim’s handkerchief. Daring leaned over.

“Are they usually this… absurdly emotional?...” she trailed off, not knowing what to think.

Flim looked up, his eyes red from crying. “You’ve been our only friend… and if you were to die because of something we let you do… we’d never… be able to… to… TO!...” he began to weep, absurd amounts of tears pouring from his eyes.

Flam spoke up briefly before also bursting into tears. “NEVER BE ABLE TO FORGIVE OURSELVES!” I just groaned and dipped my hand into my palm.

“I’ll give you guys ten grand,” I commented and they both stopped, heads up and ears perked in attention.

“WHAT?!” They both gasped.

“I’ll pay you ten large… in cash,” I said and Flim and Flam’s jaws both went slack.

“I-i-is that… ten each? As in twenty all together?...” Flim trailed off in thought.

“Yeah, sure…” I trailed off, hopping greed would overpower the ‘magic’ of friendship.

“Where in Equestria would you get that kind of money?” Flam gasped and Daring spoke up.

“The museum. They’re paying top price for this expedition,” she stated and Flim and Flam both looked to each other with excited grins.

“One other condition. We want our names in bold print as the ones who supplied the gear for this expedition… oh boy, our names will be all over the frontlines!” Flim and Flam both squealed in delight as they began hopping around then stopped in midstride and looked to us. Flim spoke first.

“What we mean to say is: We’ll get your thermal gear right away!” He stated and rushed off.

Daring rose a brow. “Wow… I guess money talks,” she muttered and Flam broke in.

“Well… it’s not so much the money… as it is the… historic relevance! Yes, that’s it! Historic relevance! Imagine it. The unreachable, finally reached! And supplied with our gear no less!” Flam exclaimed and Daring interjected.
“Dragons have made it up there before,” she commented and Flam just rubbed his chin to try and think of an excuse then looked back to Juggernaut, the armored truck.

“I’ll go get the truck ready!” he offered then took a better look at Daring. “Oh, by the way, your Daring Do outfit is pretty good, but you’re missing the hat, and your mane isn’t nearly long enough,” he stated then quickly scurried off as Daring just groaned, burying her face into her hooves…

* * *

Third person,

Wednesday, May 20th, 2014…

Twilight moseyed down the stairs, a little on the worried side. Spike was already sorting and organizing the library’s collection of fictional novels. Lassie at times would help Spike but at others would just mingle uselessly, watch television or listen to the radio.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity for her, Twilight spoke her mind. “Ithinksomething’swrong!” she sputtered. Both Spike and Lassie looked to her. “Evan didn’t come home last night. He said he was just going for a walk, but it’s been too long to just be a walk,” she said anxiously and Lassie just chewed on the inside of her cheek in a not so worried way.

“Meh… he’ll be fine. He’s probably just helping Flim and Flam again or something. They’re always having trouble with desert bandits,” Lassie commented and Twilight thought back to how those two brothers tried to swindle the Apple Family farm.

“Good… they deserve it,” she commented and Lassie gave her a funny look.

“Really?... I dunno, they seemed okay to me,” the canine replied. Taking a look out the window, she noticed that Cadence was still parked in the car shelter. She rubbed her chin attentively in thought. “Hmm… that’s weird…” Lassie said and Twilight immediately sped to Lassie’s side, trying to see what Lassie was looking at.

“What’s weird? What is it?! IT’SSOMETHINGBADISN’TIT?!” Twilight sputtered. Lassie pushed her away.

“Jeeze, calm down you crazy old bat! He’s only been gone for like…” she looked at the clock. “Twelve hours. He might’ve stayed over at somepony else’s house,” Lassie stated.

“I thought you said he went to see Flim and Flam!” Twilight said, still worried. Lassie just rolled her eyes with a huff.

“Listen, chill the buck out! I thought he might’ve went to see them, but his truck’s still here so… it’d be a helluva walk,” Lassie commented. Spike slightly rose one of his claws.

“Uhm… I saw Evan last night,” he said cautiously. The other two looked to him.

"Why didn't you say something earlier?!" Twilight gasped.

“Well… I mean… yeah,” he said, not really wanting to become part of the discussion. He was partly siding with Lassie, Twilight was acting far too bizarre for her own good. He hadn’t been gone that long.

Twilight’s one hoof tapped nervously. “Well… what was he doing?” she asked, still in somewhat of a panic.

“Uhm… well… walking,” Spike replied and Twilight was quick to sputter out another question.

“Do you know what he was actually doing? Where he was going?” she asked hastily and Spike shrugged.
“I dunno… he... he was with some mare that was dressed like that character from Dash’s books… Daring Do I think she’s called,” Spike said and Twilight bit her lip.

“Maybe he was kidnaped!” Twilight thought drastically. Both Spike and Lassie groaned. She looked to the two of them. “This could be serious! Evan could be in real danger!” Twilight scorned them and Lassie just chuckled.

“Okay… seriously… calm the hay down. How many times has Evan been in the face of danger and just like… totally was fine,” Lassie said casually. Twilight however, couldn’t help but to worry herself over this. The dog just let out a ‘Ugggh!’ and grabbed her by the hoof and began tugging her towards the door.

“Spike, stay here and… be productive. Come on princess,” Lassie ordered and Twilight looked to the talking canine with wide eyes.

“Wh-where are we going?” Twilight asked stammeringly as she was pulled along.

“Out.”

“Out? Out where? Why?” Twilight asked, unsure and hesitantly.

“Wherever. Today you’re gonna relax and just fuck the dog all day,” Lassie commented and Twilight went wide eyed.

“I’m… I’M GONNA WHAT?!” She gasped in shock and Lassie groaned.

“It’s a metaphor!”

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…

It took us a few days, two or three, to reach the base of the mountain. The place was up near the top of Equestria, according to Daring, it was a few miles away from The Crystal Empire. Apparently Twilight’s brother is the prince there or something.

Flim and Flam were gracious… or greedy enough, to offer us a bunch of cool mountain climbing gear. At first I thought it to be cumbersome and heavy… but now, up here where it was a bit nippy… I realized it was fully worth the weight.

I pulled the battle truck to a stop and took a moment to fully realize the adventure I had agreed to partake in. The clouds were so dense, dark and grey that I couldn’t even see the peak of the mountain.

“Why don’t you just fly to the top? You got wings,” I asked and Daring smirked.

“I already explained this a dozen times. I can’t. Up there, the air is so thin that pegasus can’t create enough air pressure beneath them to give them flight. Not even Gryphons can fly up there. Dragons can only ascend it because of their size. Climbing up that mountain to them, is like you or I climbing any ordinary cliff… just uhh… they can’t stay up their long. Oxygen levels aren’t very high up there. Apparently a few dragons have died when they decided to take a nap, never woke up,” she informed me.

“If they were dead, then how'd they tell everypony they were just taking a nap?” I asked and Daring blinked, unsure about how to answer. I let out a deep exhale as I shifted the truck back into drive, also activating the enhanced traction. I still couldn’t believe I was going to do this.

* * *

Third person, Ponyville…

Lassie raced across the field after the Frisbee. Twilight was, as always, freaked out and overly anxious about Evan’s disappearance, but just like the last few days, Lassie had been able to occupy her with something that took her mind away from the subject.

Lassie returned with the Frisbee, panting and wagging her tail in an excited way. “Lassie… why is it that dogs like to chase Frisbees and tennis balls so much?” Twilight asked and Lassie was speechless, not sure really why she, or why any other dog for that matter, liked chasing stuff like balls or Frisbees.

“I don’t really know… it’s like… chasing it is an exhilarating… irresistible urge, but once we catch it… it’s like we’ve found inner peace… like it was our meaning in life to catch the ball… then there’s this sense, somewhere deep down inside… saying we should do it again… almost as if it was meant to be… like it was our destiny to give the ball back and fetch it again!” Lassie informed Twilight who merely looked at her with a weirded out look.

“Uhm…” she trailed off. Lassie blinked.

“Does any of that make sense to you?” the canine asked but Twilight shook her head.

“Not-even-a little,” she replied. “That’d be like saying you’ve worked so hard in life to finally reach your goal, but in the end just throw it away to do it again… it’s crazy!” she stated but Lassie shrugged.

“It brings you happiness, and us dogs like making others happy,” she said and Twilight just blinked.

“But I thought… dogs liked playing fetch just because it was fun,” she said and Lassie nodded.

“Maybe you should try fetching the Frisbee!” she replied but Twilight shook her head.

“Uhm… no thanks…”

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…
Reaching base camp… or what was left of it, was a synch in Juggernaut. The only downside was that from here on up, I couldn’t take the truck. The awkward terrain and uneven land would prove impossible for the truck to ascend… that also meant I wouldn’t be in the comfort of the truck’s heater and air conditioning.

Even with the heavy gear meant for cold temperatures… it was still chilly out. I slammed the door to the truck, making sure it was all the way closed. I just prayed that when we got back it would still run. Being a diesel, it might not want to readily start in such cold temperatures. Daring noticed my discomfort from the climate. “Get used to it. Apparently it’s colder the higher we go. They say it can get to sixty below at the peak,” she commented.

“Is that what the dead napping dragons say?” I replied in a quipy way. Christ… my breath was like fog. I didn’t bother with the oxygen tanks just yet. I’d start using them around the four thousand meter mark or so… maybe four and a half thousand. Neither of us were experienced climbers… hah! Two inexperienced climbers about to try and ascend to the summit of the most dangerous peak in the world… that’d make headlines.

We looked around the camp. It was almost unnoticeable that somepony had once been here. There was a small wooden hut that had been made, but most of the siding had been ripped down and the structure had crumbled… probably by the constant pounding of the high winds and inhospitable weather.

“Wanna have a look around?” I asked but Daring shook her head.

“Nah… a lot of ponies have already rummaged through this place trying to find any evidence about what happened to Archimedes. Anything you find will probably be useless,” she said.

I looked up the mountain… this would be like going up a roller coaster. Scary as shit going up… then just as terrifying coming down. It looked like an endless abyss… the dark clouds that obscured one’s vision of the peak… it just sent constant shivers down my back… then again, that might’ve just been the cold weather…

* * *

Third person, Ponyville…

Lassie giggled as she and Twilight watched the chick flick at the theatre. To still keep her mind off Evan, she had brought her out for a movie. To Twilight, it was great, the drama and such. But to Lassie, it was just goofy and ridiculous.

The movie finally ended with the mare finally getting back at her ex. As the theatre lit up, Lassie and Twilight left, heading out towards Cadence.

“You know… it was weird at first that you could talk… but I never thought you’d be able to drive his truck,” Twilight commented and Lassie just shrugged as the duo hopped into the vehicle.

“It’s easy really…” she turned to the steering wheel. “Isn’t that right baby… cause if you were difficult…” Lassie said in a whiny tone as she stroked and caressed the truck’s steering wheel and column. “Then that’d make you a bitch,” Lassie said in a hushed tone. “But… you’re not, are you?” she asked in a very seductive voice.

She slid the naughty key along and swiped it in the cubby hole, emitting a beep. “Oooh… oh you like that… don’t you?” Lassie asked. Twilight just shook her head and buried her face into her hoof.

Lassie began to buck her hips. “Oh… oh yeah baby… oh I like that too… oh yes… oh… ohh!” Lassie moaned as she ran the glow plugs. “Oh baby… oh… I'm so close...” she turned the ignition for the truck and it rumbled to life. Lassie’s body shuddered as she let out an orgasmic scream. “OH YES! I’M CUMMING!” She screamed and Twilight just groaned.

“I can’t believe both of you do that,” she commented and Lassie slowly came off her orgasmic high, huffing slightly. Twilight flicked on the dome light and inspected the seat cover where Lassie was sitting, noticing a small puddle of slime.

“LASSIE! Were you… really?!” Twilight asked and Lassie just grinned.

“Hey… I was horny, and this truck... I can feel the rumble... running up my leg...” she commented explicitly then looked to her spare paw which she had been using to secretly masturbate with. Pussy juice coated her paw and she sniffed it before promptly licking it clean.

“Eww… Lassie that’s gross,” Twilight complained and the canine simply looked to her and waved her cum infested paw at her.

“Want some. It’s bitterly sweet,” she joked…

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…
We had to break out the ice picks and start climbing the wall of ice. It looked like there used to be a free-flowing waterfall here but then it was turned to ice. Maybe this part of the world used to be warm or something? Kinda like back on my world with Pangaea...

It was dangerous, climbing like this. I was already around 250lbs, then with the gear I was wearing, I’d be nearing 300… maybe 325. After just a few hours of journeying up the mountain I had to stop. It was exhausting. It seemed like it was harder to do then it would be on the ground, and I had no idea why. I could easily haul around fifty or seventy five pounds before, but doing it up here just drained me.

Every time I drove the ice pick into the frozen waterfall and used it to pull myself up while I swung my free one, the ice around the point of impact would start to crack and spider web.

I swear… a few times I thought the ice was just going to give out and I would fall to my death. They say not to look down… but I can’t really. The gear is so thick I don’t really have much maneuverability.

I wish we had those ropes, like they did in the movies. The ones where they nailed them into the ice below them then knot the end of the rope to their harness so that if they fell, they’d be caught by the rope. But alas, nopony had thought of it at the time.

We just had some ice picks, oxygen tanks with masks and a ladder to climb across gaps. We also had water an a good supply of food... though it was dehydrated food which tasted really bad.

I felt a little bad for Daring. Being a pegasus, she must’ve felt so cooped up inside her gear. Hell, I was just a human and from time to time I just wanted to rip off my gear… but I know that it wouldn't take long for me to get hypothermia.

Daring continued up above me, just racing along. Christ she was good. I’d never really seen professional climbers, but if I hadn’t known better, I’d have mistaken her for a climber, not an adventurer.

She swung her ice pick into the ice but as she did, the one below gave way. She lost her immediate balance and her hindlegs kicked as she tried to get a grip with her spiked boots. The ice pick and falling debris cluttered down on me.

“EH!” I gasped as I tried to shield my eyes.

She squirmed but as she did, her other ice pick gave way and she fell. My eyes went wide. “DARING!” I yelled. Time seemed to slow. ‘Oh… fuck my life,’ was all I could think. I swung my left ice pick hard into the ice, then kicked both boots hard into the surface, making sure to get a good grip.

She was only a few feet above me, thank goddess, but I knew the combined weight, plus the momentum she’d have built up in that short distance, would not be nice to my shoulder.

As she fell, I grabbed out with my right arm, my most dominant one, and snatch at her backpack. The weight jerked against me and for a moment, I thought my icepick would’ve given way to. Thankfully it didn’t.

My shoulder seared in pain. She wasn’t that heavy, maybe a hundred pounds at tops… but the added weight of her gear made her feel like a full sized human woman, along with the falling momentum.

“UGGGGH!” I groaned in pain, and my body’s immediate instinct was to let go, but I pushed past it and held tight. “Daring!” I gritted my teeth. “Crawl up… onto my back…” I heard the cracking of ice as my icepick’s hold started to give way. “HURRY!” I yelled and she immediately scurried up to my back.

I quickly ascended the last few dozen feet to the edge of the frozen waterfall, and climbed up. “Get me the fuck…” I trailed off, a terrified shiver rattling my body as I scurried away from the side of the waterfall.

I dropped my head back and just looked to the dark sky above us. I had no idea what time it was… no idea what day it was… oh man… fuck this. Daring flopped down beside me. “Thank you… I thought for sure I was dead,” she thanked me and I just rolled my hurting shoulder.

“For the record… we’re not friends… if I saw you face down in a ditch… I’d pull you head out just so you wouldn’t drown,” I said and she gave me a frown.

“Well gee… you’re a cheery one,” she said in an unimpressed way.

“Yeah, well I’m also the one who wrote shit in her book about the guy who saved her life twice.”

She just huffed. “Okay… for the record, I didn’t write the book, I just wrote the script of what happened,” she countered and I just rubbed my shoulder attentively.

I huffed in deep breaths. The air was getting thinner. I pulled off my balaclava and right glove for a moment so I could use the Eagle Eye and figure out how high we were. As I screwed around with the menu options, Daring looked to me.

“I was meaning to ask. When did you lose your eye?” she asked.

“Not long ago,” I replied, not bothering to even look at her.

“How?” she asked, somewhat wonderingly.

“It was frozen,” I muttered, barely even acknowledging that she was speaking. I didn’t really like her all that much.

“Oh hardy har har… seriously, how'd you lose it?” she asked.

I rolled my eye. “No, seriously. It was frozen… four thousand, three hundred meters… we’ll need to make sure to start using our oxygen tanks a little bit more… I think,” I muttered. I was feeling a wee bit queasy, but not enough to make much of a difference.

“Oh… I’m sorry, about your eye,” she said sincerely.

“It was a small sacrifice,” I replied as I slipped my balaclava and glove back on.

“For what?” she asked but I never answered…

* * *

Third person…

Spike was out helping Rarity again, and as such, Lassie had conned Twilight into watching a cheap horror movie with her on the television. It was a corny vampire movie from way back near the beginning of movie history.

The audio, along with the video, was pretty poor but still watchable. Lassie giggled and laughed as the vampire flew down, obviously suspended by the noticeable cables. The vampony spread her robe wide. “I… AM DR-“ but Lassie cut in and finished the line.

“DRA-GOO-LETTA!” She laughed in a playfully intimidating voice. The stallion on the screen flailed his hoof to his forehead with a feeble gasp then fainted into her hold. “GAY!” Lassie laughed and Twilight looked at her.

“How is that… gay?” she asked and Lassie looked to her with a quizzical stare.

“What kind of straight stallion would do that?” she asked and Twilight was a little speechless.

The early depiction of Draculetta on screen showed her revealing her fangs. Lassie spoke up, in the perfect mimicking voice. “Now! I shall suck your blood!” The vampony sunk her fangs into the stallion who simply let out a rather flamboyant peep for a scream.

Lassie just squeaked out a laugh. “And what kind of stallion screams like that?” she asked. The scene ended into darkness and Twilight looked to the dog.

“Didn’t you go to see this movie a week or two ago?” she asked and Lassie nodded.

“Yeah, it was the pornographic remake,” she replied and Twilight gasped.

“They showed pornography in the local theater?!” She exclaimed and Lassie just sighed.

“Well… it wasn’t really a porno. It was a remake, but they had lots of really sexy scenes and didn’t even bother to censor it out or anything. Later in the movie, that stallion is actually transformed into a vampony and they become close. Anyway, there’s this part where she’s about to transform another stallion, but instead she quips the line ‘Now I shall suck…’ then she trails off and simply breaks the stallion’s neck, then looks to the vampony stallion and without another word just starts sucking him off, then fucks him and he blows his load in her,” she says and Twilight just blinked and looked away timidly.

“Oh… uhm…” she really was speechless.

“Well, anyway, so in the end of the movie it turns out she cocooned a bunch of their offspring, so even though the main character chick killed Draculetta and her husband, one of the cocoons hatched and it screeched into the screen just as the movie ended so…” she trailed off. “Sexy sequel.”

“I… Don’t think I’d want to see it,” she said, not really wanting to partake in the sexually explicit movie.

Lassie shrugged. “Whatever, it was a great storyline. Not quite as good as the original but the new effects made up for it,” she replied.

“I… I wouldn’t… the-“ but Lassie cut her short.

“You’re shy and timid about seeing cock spurt loads of cum into a pussy on screen?” the canine asked vulgarly, making the alicorn princess blush intensely.

“I-I-ah…” Twilight trailed off and Lassie rolled her eyes.

“Whatever… you’re letting your shyness for other ponies’ sexual activity ruin a perfectly good movie for you…"

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…

I had puked earlier this morning… or maybe it was midday… Christ I couldn’t even tell. I didn’t bother looking to my watch. It wouldn’t make a difference anyway.

I was finding it a little difficult to down much of anything, which made it had to keep up my body’s stamina. That dehydrated crap tasted bad anyway, but at least it was full of nutrients and vitamins.

Sleep wasn’t nice either. It was always cold and miserable… and I had to share a tent with Daring, but she wasn’t as keen on the idea either so it was a lose-lose situation which worked out well for the both of us.

Why the hell were the clouds so thick up here anyway? I know that Daring said pegasus couldn’t fly up this high, but it’s not like anywhere else there’s this constant… luminous death cloud that lingers around.

The air was getting thinner and I needed to use the oxygen mask more often than not. Even Daring wore hers quite often.

I had kept the Eagle Eye on so I could keep track of my vitals: heart rate, body temperature… how’d Flim and Flam integrate half this shit anyway? There was even a map option to follow the path we had taken up… it would come in useful for the way back down though.

The two of us set up camp in an open spot. I wanted to build camp under an overhang but Daring opted against it saying that the overhang wasn’t that thick and could collapse on us… maybe she was an experienced climber.

My body, despite being in physical form, was not meant for this. I had this awful headache. It wasn’t like a fever headache either. My head just hurt and throbbed. I was gonna try to get more sleep this time… try to.

We began setting up the tent which wasn’t very big. Flim had stated the smaller the tent the better, something about how the body heat we generated wouldn’t take long to warm us if we had a condensed tent versus a larger one. The lining was also apparently some kinda fabric that insulated our body heat and kept over ninety five percent of it in… goddess, these guys were smarter than a lot of the scientists back home.

“Here I am talking to myself,” I muttered and Daring looked to me.

“Huh?” she asked curiously and I shook my head.

“Just thinking… it’s driving me insane,” I said and Daring nodded. We finally got the tent set up. I dumped my backpack off and just about everything but my heavy undergarment clothing. God my clothing was starting to stink. I hadn’t showered in… a long time.

I also hadn’t shaved before we left so I was starting to grow a beard which was frosting. I zipped up the tent. “Tomorrow… we’re gonna reach the summit… or we’re gonna have to go back down to resupply,” I muttered, rethinking about our supplies.

Oxygen wasn’t a huge issue, but it would be if we didn’t hurry it up. Water was also another thing. We had to start melting snow but it was a somewhat longer process than what I would’ve liked. We were also running short on our food supply.

“And if we can’t… I mean, on our second attempt?” she asked and I just thought about it.

“Let’s not think about it… it’ll make my headache worse,” I said, rubbing my exposed forehead. I unzipped my coat a little and snugged into the big sleeping blanket. I slipped off my socks to make sure my feet got some fresh air.

Daring scooched over and offered me a water bottle. “Here,” she offered and I looked at it with a raised brow.

“That’s not your tent pee bottle is it?” I joked, though due to my exhaustion there wasn’t much expression in my voice.

“No you dunce. It’s water. You need it to keep up your strength,” she said and I rolled over.

“No thanks… I already drank,” I lied. I didn’t want any cold water right now… I just wanted to sleep.

“Hey… freezing to death isn’t the only thing you gotta worry about. You can dehydrate as well and die from thirst.” I paid her no mind but she persisted. I groaned and rolled over.

“If I drink, will you let me sleep?” I asked and she nodded, pushing the large bottle towards me. I unscrewed the cap and took a small sip. I could feel the water trickle down my throat, and even lubricate my dry lips. I only took a little sip though. Last time I drank too much water and got a stomach cramp.

I offered her back the water. “Hey! What was that?! You have to drink at least a liter,” she said and I gave her a glare. “I haven’t seen you drink since this morning, now drink!” she ordered.

I just gave her an emotionless stare, screwed the cap back on and gave it back to her. I just wished I hadn’t come along for this journey… wished I had’ve just gutted up and told Rarity.

Sleep, like always, was hard to get… almost like I had to start it manually, find a way to induce myself into it… but once I found it, it was like heaven…

* * *

Third person…

Spike helped Lassie with some dishes, washing them and setting in to the drying rack. “SoooOOOOooo…” Lassie trailed off and Spike looked to her.

“So… what?” he asked.

“So I noticed you spend a lot of time with Rarity,” she teased and Spike’s face went a flush of red.

“Well… I kinda… I kinda like… helping her out. She’s just been robbed! Can you believe that?! Who would rob her?! Why she’s so…” he trailed off then began a list of appraising things he had to say about her.

As Spike went on, Lassie just rolled her eyes. She had seen how that mare treated him. “You forgot aristocrat,” she muttered under her breath. Spike stopped.

“Wha-what? Aristocrat, what’s that?” he asked and Lassie just rolled her eyes.

“Don’t worry about it squirt… just remember, there’s more than one crown jewel in a pile of diamonds,” she commented, hinting towards Sweetiebelle. She had noticed the little filly’s attraction to Spike but also noticed that Spike was a little dense towards it. ‘Maybe Burdy’s density has rubbed off on this kid,’ she thought to herself.

“Huh… I don’t get it,” Spike replied back but Lassie just shrugged.
“Don’t worry about it kid. You have your whole life to live, don’t let it revolve around a single mare if the love is only one way,” she mentioned.

Spike’s face went a deeper hue of red. “Well… well she just hasn’t realized yet… plus I’m a little too young. When I’m older she’ll notice me,” Spike stammered.

Lassie muttered to herself, quiet enough that Spike couldn’t hear her. “Don’t hold your breath.”

Spike then realized something. Lassie knew about his crush on Rarity. “Hey… how’d you find out?!” he gasped, like a colt who had been caught in the act. Lassie rolled her eyes.

“You’re easy to read,” she commented in an un-amused way.

Spike just bit his lip. “Well… can you promise not to tell Rarity?” he pleaded and Lassie just groaned. It wasn’t a well-kept secret that he liked her. Just about everypony in town knew.

“Yeah, sure,” Lassie replied casually.

“I mean like… Pinkie Pie Promise?” Spike asked and Lassie went through the motions, though as she did, soapy water splashed and flicked at Spike. “Ahh! Hey!” He looked at her with a somewhat annoyed look, thinking she had done it purposefully.

“What?” Lassie asked back innocently, seeing what she had done. Spike splashed a bit of water back at her then giggled. Lassie got a coy grin then pawed a bit of water back at his scaly skin, only giggling louder.

Spike paddled his claws, splashing a somewhat constant spray of water at the dog. “Two can play at this game!” Lassie laughed and began to hovel water at the young dragon. Spike grabbed two cups and began shoveling cups of water at the dog.

Lassie reached over and grabbed the sink nozzle and began to hose the young dragon with a never ending torrent of water. “The one with the endless resources will win the battle!” Lassie giggled and they both drenched the kitchen floor in a matter of seconds.

Suddenly the water turned off, the sink itself covered in a purple magical aura. They both looked over to see a somewhat irritated alicorn princess, tapping her front hoof. Spike and Lassie pointed to one another and spoke in unison “HE/SHE DID IT!”

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…

I awoke thrashing, grasping for air. It was… just a dream. I found myself light headed and stopped completely, calming myself as quickly as I could. Hooves started stroking my sides. “Hey… woah… calm down… calm down” said an all too familiar voice.

I felt the rubber lining of an oxygen mask come up to my face. Slowly, I started breathing fresh oxygen. Daring continued to coo me. “Relax… relax… it was just a dream… all a dream,” she said in a most soothing voice.

I laid back down and noticed my blanket was shredded… and there was blood. I spoke, though my voice was muffled by the air mask. “Daring, are you okay?!” I gasped and she nodded worriedly.

“I’m not hurt… but I could’ve been if you had’ve gone on for a few more seconds… Celestia, that must’ve been some nightmare,” she mentioned and I nodded. It was about Freeze… and Baltimare.

“I was… dreaming… about when I lost my eye… in Baltimare… against Freeze,” I told her truthfully, forgetting about all the blood that had mysteriously ended up in the tent.

“Seriously?” she asked and I nodded. “Are you feeling okay?” she asked and I gave a shrug.

“Kinda… why?” I asked and she smiled.

“Because you opened up a little to me. Usually you’re kind of brash about things,” she smiled and I just sighed.

“I still don’t like you,” I replied back and she just frowned.

“Okay! Jeeze. I’m sorry I portrayed you to be a psycho. I already offered you half my pay on top of yours, what more do you want?” she asked and I just shrugged. If I never saw her again, and never heard her name… it probably wouldn’t come fast enough.

“Nothing… I just want to get this done and never see you ever again,” I muttered mindlessly. I wasn't thinking straight and my words just came out. Her face just… it almost wasn’t describable. It was like a light shut off. Everything happy in her emotion just died.

I felt dehydrated and went for some water. Unlike most other times, Daring didn’t go to help me out, just sat there, looking aimlessly. I chugged back some water and laid back down, falling asleep almost too quickly…

* * *

Third person…

Lassie and Twilight cruised around in Cadence. Spike had left earlier that day with Sweetiebelle. Lassie wore a plaid shirt and Evan’s ball cap hat that she had found in the glove box. On the broadside of the hat there was a blue oval that read ‘Ford’. There was also a caption above it say ‘Built’ and below it ‘Tough’.

“I really hope Spike lets go of Rarity and falls for her sister,” Lassie said out of the blue as she drove. Twilight looked to her and blinked.

“What makes you say that? Maybe his heart is set on Rarity, forever,” she mentioned and Lassie looked over to her.

“Wasn’t it you that said it’ll probably never happen?” she asked and Twilight just bit her lip.

“Well… sometimes fate has other things in mind,” she said with a small smile, thinking about Evan. Lassie looked out the window and to the scenery as she slowly puttered along with the windows down.

“Oh… what makes you say that? They’re way off in age, the love is only one way and they’re a different species,” she commented and Twilight looked back to her.

“So? How’s that really all that different from Sweetiebelle’s perspective? Sure they’re kinda close to the same age, but the love is only one way and they’re still a different species,” Twilight commented and Lassie just twitched her lip in thought.

“It’s just… that if Spike realized, it could be something. That twat Rarity-“ Twilight cut her short.

“Rarity is not a… genital,” she said, not wanting to partake in swearing.

Lassie just sighed. “Okay, yeah… sorry, but seriously. She obviously knows, but she uses that to her own personal gain, and in return gives him virtually nothing.” Twilight just sighed. “I mean, she’s the element of generosity but seriously… if that’s what’s considered generosity, I should be the element bearer.”

Twilight just rose a brow. “Oh… you think you’re generous?” she asked and Lassie nodded.

“Yeah. I’m taking time outta my life to make sure you stop moping about Evan being gone. It’s hard you know, trying to think up all these ways to keep you occupied,” she said then bit her lip. He had been gone for a while now. Two weeks, give or take.

Twilight said nothing and began pondering the thought, about how Spike had seen him with another mare just before he disappeared. “You don’t think he-“ but Lassie cut her short, already knowing full well what she was thinking.

“Nope, not even a chance,” she said and Twilight blinked. Lassie spoke her full opinion.

“That man is absolutely, one hundred percent, utterly retarded when it comes to mares. I mean… a mare could brush up against him and say ‘Take me to a place I’ve never been’ and the dunce’d probably launch her into orbit,” Lassie commented and Twilight just giggled.

Lassie continued her rant. “I bet if a mare said she was in the mood to be stuffed by his big fat sausage, he’d somehow procure a fat sausage and stuff it down her throat… the idiot,” she muttered, again getting a slight giggle out of Twilight.

“I bet… if a mare spread her legs and was like ‘I'm really in the mood for your penis,’ he’d be like ‘durr’ then put a fish disguise on and put a giant carrot on her head and be like ‘Oh wait… no, this doesn’t make any sense’.” Twilight couldn’t help but to laugh, mostly from knowing full well the man she loved was as dense as they came, but she loved him all the same.

“Yeah… he’s not the brightest, but that’s also a benefit. I’ll never really have to worry about him cheating on me,” she said and Lassie rose a brow.

“You were worrying just a second ago,” she said and Twilight nodded.

“I just… I just needed to hear it from somepony else. He’s been gone so long,” she mentioned and Lassie nodded.

“I know. He has to hurry his ass up or he’ll be late for the school picnic,” she said and Twilight looked over. “There’s a school picnic he’s going to, Cheerilee invited him. He helps the class from time to time.”

Twilight nodded and Lassie looked to the instrument panel. “Shit… I’m gonna need to fill this girl up… Mmm… oh yeah, I’m gonna fill you up baby,” she said in a sexual tone as she began rocking her hips. Twilight just rolled her eyes. “What?” Lassie asked, taking notice.

“You’re just so… Lassie. There’s no other way of explaining it. You’re one of a kind,” she said and the dog nodded.

“Eeyup, they only made one like me,” she smiled. As they puttered along, Lassie got a little… antsy. “So… what’s his cock like?” she asked and Twilight gasped.

“Wha-what?!”

“What… is… his… cock like?” Lassie asked, very slowly and bluntly.

“I-I-I… I’m not gonna answer that,” Twilight sputtered and Lassie just huffed.

“Ohhhhh… come-on! Please?!” Lassie pleaded but Twilight shook her head.

“No… a good mare doesn’t kiss and tell,” Twilight replied and Lassie gave her a pouty face. As she neglected to watch the path, she began swerving the vehicle. “Hey!... HEY WATCH WHERE YOU’RE DRIVING!” Twilight gasped but Lassie shook her head.

“Not until you tell me,” she said and Twilight gasped.

“OKAY, IT WAS GOOD!” She yelped, fearing for the safety of herself. Lassie resumed driving safely.

“Just good or?...” she trailed off.

“Fine… it was fine,” Twilight gasped, her heart still pounding. Despite being a decent driver, when Lassie became intrigued by something else other than driving, she was all over the trail, barely dodging nearby trees on the edge of the path. Squirrels and other rodents were a fine distraction, not just the talk of sex.

“Just fine or?...” she trailed off again.

“I don’t know. It was good. What do you want me to say?” she asked and Lassie rolled her eyes.

“Details, details. What was it like having something inside your pussy for the first time? What was it like being unified with him? What did it feel like when he came inside you?” Lassie asked, trying to dig up everything.

“Why do you want to know?” Twilight asked and Lassie pouted out in embarrassment.

“BECAUSE I’M A VIRGIN!” She cried in a Rarity-like voice of despair. Twilight just blinked in surprise.

“You’re… you’re a virgin?” she asked in disbelief and Lassie nodded somewhat shamefully.

“Is it any surprise?” she asked, still fake sobbing like Rarity would.

“Uhm… yeah. With how much you talk about it and how much you seem to know… I just thought that-“ but Lassie cut her short.

“No stallion in town is going to fuck a dog, a talking dog no less. Burdy… well, I don’t really think he’s all that cute or anything. I don’t want any old mutt banging me either… stupid mangy old things,” she commented and Twilight was taken aback by her comment.

“Stupid… mangy old things?” she asked, wondering why Lassie would speak of her own species in such a way.

“Have you ever noticed the hobo dogs that drift just outside of town? The ones that pant every time I walk past? I swear it’s almost a bad thing that Evan pampers me in such a way. To those mangy homeless dogs I’m like a goddess,” she said and Twilight took a moment to piece it together.

“You mean the… the Diamond Dogs?” she asked and Lassie shrugged.

“Yeah… goons,” she commented and Twilight rolled her eyes.

“Why in Equestria if you don’t like them ogling you, do you venture that far away from town?” Twilight asked.

“Because sometimes it’s nice to hear someone comment your body… rather than have everypony in town give you weirded out looks just because you can talk,” she mentioned. Twilight was unsure about how to take the information. Lassie looked to her again. “So please… kiss and tell. I wanna know how it was,” Lassie said and Twilight just bit her lip.

“I promised not to tell,” she commented and Lassie just sighed.

“Whatever… mental images tell a thousand words,” she muttered and Twilight looked to her with wide eyes.

“What’s that supposed to mean?!” she asked in a somewhat shocked voice.

“I… kinda watched your first time together,” Lassie giggled and Twilight took in a deep inhale.

“You… you didn’t… you did… you did, didn’t you?!” the princess interrogated and Lassie smiled smugly.

“Guilty!... as charged.” The dog drove the rumbling truck far from town. After searching around, she finally found the old warehouse Evan spoke about. She drove up to the fuel pumps and shut off the truck before stepping out.

Looking back in through the opened window, she gave Twilight a wink. “It was pretty damn sexy,” she teased, only making Twilight’s cheeks flush red. Lassie puttered around the fuel pumps, inspecting each one.

“He said… it’s a diesel truck… which one is diesel?” she asked herself, looking at the faded out signs of the pumps. She bit her lips and thought to herself. Bringing up one of her paw digits, she licked the pad on the bottom then smudged away the dust over the readouts.

In worn out letters, one of the readouts was labelled ‘D2 diesel’. Lassie smiled. “Lucky Burdy. Amazing they have the same fuel as back on his world…” she trailed off and looked to his truck. “Too bad they don’t manufacture vehicles like this around here… carriages suck,” she muttered to herself then began to wonder why: if there was fuel for these sorts of things, why not have vehicles?

She looked over to a little booth and flicked the little tab attached to the trigger that kept the pump automatically running until the tank was full. She wandered into the booth where she found some old dusty papers and booklets. She skimmed through them briefly. Most fuel designated ‘Diesel’ was used in locomotive trains, but not as often due to the environmental impact, and as such, most of the time the trains were pulled by ponies unless long distances were required. There was also the old steam engine trains which were just as devastating to the environment as the diesel locomotives.

She continued to skip through and found a part about how some generators and kerosene lamps could actually run on diesel. “Well… lucky Burdy. He’s got fuel for his truck in a completely different world,” Lassie muttered to herself as she tossed away the papers and walked back out.

The rear tank had been filled and the automatic pump had been flicked off. She wondered to herself just how somepony conjured up that idea. She began to pump the front tank then giggled to herself. “Oh yeah baby… you like it when I fill you up?” she asked in an explicit tone as she thrusted her hips.

“You like it when I pump you with my liquids… ohh yeah baby… take it, take it all,” Lassie giggled, not fully paying attention to her surroundings. Suddenly the pump flicked off. Lassie was stunned and began pulling on the nozzle trigger but nothing would come out. There wasn’t even any pressure.

“Huh… hey what…” she trailed off as she looked around, spotting rodents of unusual size. “UGH! UH!” Lassie gasped, noticing that the two giant rats were standing on their hindlegs.

“Hello, Canidae oh-six-seven,” the first rat stated and Lassie just looked at them with wide eyes.

“How have you been?” the second rat added in. Lassie just blinked, not understanding what was happening.

“Uhm… wha… I uhm… who are you guys?” she asked.

The first rat started. “I am Muridae Rattus nine-oh-seven.”

The second rat added in. “And I am Muridae Rattus nine-oh-eight.” Lassie just blinked and looked at the two abnormally sized rats that walked almost like Burdy, or even a Diamond Dog.

There was a brief pause then Lassie spoke. “Are you guys… on drugs?” she asked but the first rat just laughed heartily.

“No… no,” he chuckled out his response. “We’re simply here to check up on you, see how you’re doing with your mission,” they said and Lassie just blinked.

“Uhm…” Lassie trailed off just as Twilight stepped out of the truck, having been occupied with the owner’s manual for the truck and not noticed the occurrence until now.

“Lassie!... What… what’s going on?” she asked hesitantly, having never seen giant rodents like that before.

“Twilight, get in the truck,” Lassie ordered, slightly worried.

“But I-“ but Lassie cut her short.

“Just get in the truck honey,” the canine ordered again. The first rat rose a brow.

“Honey… oooh hoo… Canidae oh-six-seven, you dog… snagged a princess,” it laughed and Lassie looked back to them.

“My name is Lassie,” she said and the rat just looked to her.

“What kind of name is Lassie, oh-six-seven?” it asked and Lassie looked him dead in the eyes.

“The name my friend gave me,” she said sternly. The rat closed his eyes with a sigh of disgrace.

“Ugghh… Canines… always becoming domesticated pets,” he spat and Lassie blinked. “You’re gonna have to come with us, have a talk with the boss,” he ordered he but Lassie shook her head.

“Uhm… no, actually, I’m not done here,” she said, going for the pump switch.

The rat stepped in her way, puffing out his chest a little. “Actually, I think you are,” the rat said with the most intimidating voice he could muster. Lassie just sighed.

“Well… whatever you’re thinking, rethink it,” she said. The first rat laughed again.

"Rethink it," he chuckled to himself then looked back to the other. "She says I should rethink it," he laughed with a smug smile. Lassie went for the pump switch. The rat got aggressive once more.

“Don’t you dare touch that pump,” he snarled. Lassie stepped back cautiously. After a moment, she stood to her hindlegs then slowly reached her arm up over the pump and to the switch, then flicked it on. Still standing on her hindlegs, she resumed filling the truck.

The first rat laughed, which was followed by the second rat chiming in. He chuckled quietly to himself. “You fucked up… oh you done and fucked up,” he laughed quietly then got close to Lassie and whispered to her ear.

“Why don’t I take you around back and kick your fuckin’ ass up over your shoulders?” he hissed before grabbing for the pump nozzle. Lassie whipped back and jabbed the nozzle at his gut.

He was winded from the blow and staggered back slightly. Grabbing his head with her left paw, she drove the side of his head into the edge of the fuel pump monitor. He dropped like a sack of potatoes. Lassie snugged her ball cap tightly to her head but the second rat rushed in and took a heavy swing at Lassie.

She arched her body back and dodged the first swing, then drove a quick one-two punch into the rat’s guts. He staggered a bit then took another heavy swing with his left. Lassie ducked her head to the right, letting the rat’s tiny fist swing past her face.
She grabbed his wrist with her left paw then swung an upwards palm strike into his elbow. The rat staggered back in slight pain, grasping his busted elbow. Lassie wasn’t one to let him get his guard up and drove a nasty kick straight to his groin. Before he could double over however, Lassie grabbed his head with her right paw and slammed his head into Cadence’s box.

As his head whiplashed, Lassie kicked at his feet and tripped him, his body landing with an audible ‘THUD!’

The first rat was up and at it again. He grabbed Lassie by her shoulders. The canine whipped around, her right arm swinging up high and around. She came face to face with him and hooked her right arm under his left elbow then tugged up, putting him into a pressure point move.

He grunted, barely able to move as he tried to alleviate the pain by arching his body up more but Lassie kept the pressure on him. He grunted but Lassie just drove her forehead into his and released her grip on him, letting him fall back to the ground again.

She turned around, hearing shuffling behind her. The second rat was staggering to his feet. She had to admit, they were determined. She cocked the right side of her body back then jumped forwards and through the air, then delivering a nasty roundhouse kick to his temple, knocking him clean out. Lassie fell to the ground and stumbled about, uncoordinated after her kick.

The first rat staggered to his feet, barely able to move but he now had the drop on Lassie. Just as he went to kick at Lassie’s head however, a magical blast soared out from the open window of the truck and slammed the rat in the side, smashing him into the pump and finally knocking him out.

Lassie stopped and took a deep breath, stood up then pulled the ball cap hat tightly to her head. She didn’t bother filling the front tank. She turned off the pump and hung up the nozzle before turning to the truck. She quickly tightened the fuel cap and shut the fuel door on the truck before hopping into the vehicle and leaving.

Twilight looked to Lassie. “What was all that about?” she asked and Lassie just shrugged.

“I don’t know,” she said, heart pounding. She truthfully had no idea what they wanted. Twilight was breathing heavily, but Lassie kept herself well under control.

“I was really scared back there, I didn’t know what they were going to do,” she said. Lassie looked to her.

“Aren’t you a powerful alicorn goddess?” she asked and Twilight looked away bashfully. “So even if they knocked me out couldn’t you have like… restrained them with your magic?” she asked and Twilight nodded.

“Yes, but it all happened so fast, under a few seconds… weren’t you scared?” she asked and Lassie didn’t answer for a moment.

“Well… there’s nothing wrong with being afraid right? Makes you remember that you’re still alive,” she said.

Twilight nodded. “You didn’t look scared,” she said and Lassie just nodded.

“Lots of practice,” she joked then gave Twilight an playful punch to the shoulder. Twilight looked to her.

“Maybe you could teach me, then I won’t feel like such a damsel in distress,” she said and Lassie just laughed.

“Oh hardly. I’ve heard about your heroic tales. Fighting Nightmare Moon, taking on Discord… you could’ve handled those blokes easy,” Lassie assured her and Twilight smiled.

“You think so?” she asked and Lassie nodded. “So then why’d you ask me to get back in the truck?”

“So that you wouldn’t get hurt. I know you can handle your own but I still need to protect you as best I can. And protecting you isn’t letting you get involved in a heated fight,” she said and Twilight frowned.

“Just because I’m a princess-“ but Lassie cut her short.

“It’s got nothing to do with you being a princess. It’s got something to do with you being my friend’s… mom slash fillyfriend slash… I don’t even know what to call you two,” she replied. Twilight smiled.

“Thank you Lassie…”

* * *

Burdy’s perspective…

I felt a little cold… like it was drafty. There was a hoof shaking me. “Psst… hey… psst, Burdy,” Daring whispered.

I awoke , light headed as always but came to my full senses as I realized we were surrounded by a dozen ponies. I couldn’t tell if they were stallions or mares due to the heavy clothing, but they had cut down our tent and were pointing spears and swords at us.

They dragged us out of our sleeping bags. Goddess, holy shit it was fucking cold. All I had was my undergarments which did close to piss all to keep me warm. It must’ve been pretty decent weather though, metaphorically speaking, maybe only -20 degrees Celsius. Daring was lucky, at least she had fur.

I was shivering, my feet wear itchy and painfully cold, being bare since I didn’t have my socks on when they dragged me out. Memories of the winter when I was four or five years old resurfaced.

My Uncle Corey offered to take me out on a snowmobile ride around our property up in Canada, where at the time it was nearly twenty below. In my haste, I put on all my snowmobiling gear… except I didn’t wear any socks or proper boots. The only thing that covered my feet during that twenty minute snowmobile ride was a simple pair of thin rubber boots… needless to say I almost lost my toes.

They sat me down on my knees and one stallion removed his mask. “Hello Daring,” he greeted but Daring just curled her lips at him. “Oh… why the hostility?” he asked defensively, almost as if he was doing nothing wrong.

One stallion came up and slapped a pair of flimsy looking hoofcuffs around my wirsts. I could still see my breath as I sat on my knees shivering. The stallion, whom I presumed to be the leader, looked to me. “Ahh… Daring, I thought you worked alone?” he began to tease. “So what gives with the hairless ape?” he insulted. I looked at him.

“Are you Rufus’s guys?” I asked, remembering what Daring had said about some crony that was her arch rival.

“Who?” he asked then looked to Daring who just said nothing. “Well, I’ve never heard of this Rufus fellow, but I can assure you I don’t work with him.”

I blinked. “Then who?” I asked.

“Ahuizotl,” he stated and Daring gasped. He looked to her with a grin. “Yes Daring. He’s alive, even after that little stunt you pulled back in Gryphonia,” he chuckled.

I had no idea who that was… and I kinda forgot how to pronounce his name. “Who’s asshole?” I asked but one of the ponies bucked me in the gut. I let out a sharp exhale as my wind left me.

“Have some respect you undignified creature!” the stallion, judging by his voice, yelled. I groaned as I regained my posture. If I didn’t get some clothes soon, I’d die of frostbite or hypothermia.

“Careful buddy, I’m valuable goods,” I joked and he again bucked me in the gut.

“Damaged goods,” he punned. I looked around. It was perfect. They all had their guards’ down. They not only outnumbered us, but had weapons while we didn’t, so they had this perceived disposition that they couldn’t be harmed the way things were. What they didn’t know was that the mind was the most powerful weapon of all. The ability to improvise on the spot... and right now I was improvising, while they had their guards' down.

The stallion stood back in attention, his back to me. I hopped up and tackled him to the ground while wrapping my hoofcuff chain across the front of his neck. He hacked violently just as I put my knees into the center of his back and pulled up with my arms, snapping his neck.

The others all looked to me with shocked looks as I made a dash for a nearby wall formation of ice. The leader pointed to one of his cronies. “Get him. Dead or alive, doesn’t matter!” he yelled then pointed to Daring. “Restrain her, make sure she can’t break free!” he yelled.

I rushed around the side of formation but stopped in my tracks as I found myself at the edge of the icy cliff. I effortlessly snapped the flimsy chain that held the hoofcuff shackles together. The metal was probably made in this world's equivalent of China. I looked down the face of the mountain If I was going down, I was going down fighting.

“Hey, psst!” called a familiar voice from behind me and I turned to see Derreck.
Bone claws were extended out of his knuckles, like Wolverine. But unlike the comic depictions, vast amounts of blood leaked down his forearms from the wounds that allowed the protruding claws to come out. “Oh my god that is sooo cool!” I exclaimed but he rolled his eyes.

“They hurt more than they’re worth. Come on, hop on my back!” he ordered as he turned around. I did as he asked and he immediately drove his claws into the wall of ice and began climbing upwards.

He stopped some twenty feet up and stayed still. A single stallion rushed out but stopped in shock as he didn’t see us. He cautiously leaned towards the edge of the cliff and looked down. He took sharp raspy inhales as he felt the illusion of height wanting to pull him off the side of the cliff.

Little flakes of chipped ice from where Derreck’s claws had cut in, crumbled down and past the stallion. I thought for sure he’d see us. Instead however, the falling ice terrified him and he scrambled back from the edge. “Ugh… must’ve jumped,” he muttered to himself.

* * *

Third person…

The leader got right up to Daring’s face. “Listen sweet cheeks… why not help us get the horn, join forces with Ahuizotl?” he tried to bargain. “Whatever the museum is paying, he’ll pay double,” he offered and she scoffed.

“Double a million?” she lied and the stallion bit his lip. “I didn’t think so.” The stallion scowled. Ahuizotl wanted her alive so he could execute her in some ridiculous fashion, like a snake pit. But every time they brought her back, she always escaped from those ridiculous executions.

“Oh… my dearest Daring… how I’d like to just… toss you off the edge of this cliff,” he said in a very calm tone and she smirked.

“How romantic, it’s a date then,” she punned. The stallion just smirked and went to backhoof her but a voice interrupted him.

“Sir, the ape… there’s no sign of him,” he interrupted…

* * *

Burdy’s perspective,

Moments earlier…

We waited for the stallion to leave before Derreck descended back to the flat surface. “Race you to the top,” Derreck said as he dropped me off then began to climb.

“Hey wait what? I still have to get my stuff!” I scowled and he just smirked.

“You got proper equipment. I just got bone claws that hurt to use. Last one up has to buy dinner,” he challenged competitively. For whatever reason… I just felt refreshed… alive… and ready to beat him at this challenge.

I snuck around to the side of the ice wall and peaked around the side. The lead stallion was interrogating Daring, though not physically. I could just leave her here… stupid twat… but something down inside wouldn’t let me.

I slowly and discretely snuck around and back to our trashed camp site. The ponies were all occupied with watching the leader interrogate Daring. I snuck around and grabbed an ice pick from my gear.

The stallion who had went out looking for me slowly returned. “Sir, the ape… there’s no sign of him,” he stated. I rushed up, already in the process of taking a heavy underhanded swing.

“HERE’S A SIGN!” I yelled and swung the pick right into his groin. He gasped, doubling over as blood began pouring from the wound. I yanked the pick out as another pony rushed at me. I slashed wide, slicing it across his throat. The pony's jugular sliced open and spewed blood, soiling the previously fresh snow.

With the group distracted, Daring hopped up and strangled the leader into unconsciousness with her hoofcuffs in a similar way I had done, except not as extreme.

Another pony rushed at me and I gave another slash, slicing open his throat as well. A pony rushed me from behind but was met with the bucking hooves of Daring Do, which sent him careening in another direction.

I jabbed the butt of the handle into a pony’s snout, sending him staggering. I leaned back and delivered a kick with my bare foot which sent him tumbling back. I looked back and saw Daring clack two stallions’ heads together, knocking them both out.

I turned to see a stallion charging me from the side. I swung the pick up high and drove it straight into his skull. There was a bone shattering crack that sounded but now my pick was lodged into his skull pretty good.

Daring clipped another pony with a powerful buck that knocked him away. I swung a backhand into a pony that slapped him/her away but as I did, a pony jumped on my back and tried to strangle me with a wire.

I grabbed at the wire to keep it from digging into my skin but the pony had a decent build on him. I slipped a little and fell to the ground but the pony persisted. Suddenly there was a sharp jerk and the pony was knocked off me.

I looked to see Daring, her hindlegs just coming down from her buck kick. I rolled onto my back.

A stallion who had been knocked down earlier rushed at us and jumped at me while I was still lying down. I gave a double footed kick to his chest, booting him off the edge of the cliff. He fell with an iconic scream that made me chuckle slightly.

The brief fight had warmed my body up and I was sweating a bit. I’d need to get my gear on before I started to cool down. Daring went to speak but I interrupted her. “Quick, get you’re gear on, we gotta beat Derreck to the top of the mountain,” I said in haste and she blinked.

“Who?” she asked and I repeated myself. “Is he one of Ahuizotl’s guys?” she asked and I quickly thought about it. The challenge… leaving me alone to rescue Daring… Derreck had probably knew this outcome would happen. I nodded in a lie.

We quickly rushed over to our gear and grabbed what we needed. I dried off my feet before slipping on my somewhat dry socks. My gear was cold but I’d soon warm it up. I turned to Daring. “Thanks for saving me back there… the stallion with the wire… he uhm… yeah,” I thanked her and she nodded.

“So… does this mean you don’t hate me anymore?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Nope, not even close,” I said as I slipped on my gear. She just let out a sigh and we quickly began our final ascent. What I thought might’ve been decent weather, turned into a shit-show rather quickly.

My Eagle Eye read we were 7500m above sea-level. It also read the temperatures were getting to thirty five below. Jesus, that was a helluva drop in temperature… but then again, we might’ve just been sheltered from the temperature due to where we were. Now we were not only fighting the base temperature, but the wind-chill as well.

We scrambled as fast and as safely as we could. We reached 8000m and stopped briefly for a drink. Daring looked to me. “Listen… I know I kinda wronged you but-“ I cut her short.

“Kinda is under-exaggerating it,” I commented and she sighed.

“Listen… we’re a team. And a team has to work together if they’re gonna finish an adventure alive,” she said and I looked to her.

“I think we’re doing alright,” I said and she sighed.

“Not really. I think you’re coming down with altitude sickness… we’ve both nearly died numerous times. I know you hate me and… I don’t really blame you, but can you at least show a little cooperation?” she pleaded.

“Well… cooperation… is my middle name,” I joked and she rolled her eyes. “Well… actually it’s Jayde Cherokee but…” she just giggled a little.

“Listen… I know I say it again and again but… I’m sorry, I really am,” she apologized but I just scratched the back of my neck. “I… I don’t like working with others… I’m kind of brash about it… but… thank you for coming along, even after what happened… it means a lot to me,” she said and I nodded.

“Yeah just… don’t mention it. Seriously. If you write about this shit and portray me as a psycho ape, I’ll hunt you down,” I said and Daring went a little wide-eyed. She nodded and we quickly continued our ascent. At this point we were using our air masks non-stop. The air was too thin up here for me to not use it.

As we started up a steep incline, I slipped a little and lost my footing. Daring swung her ice pick at me and I flinched. I waited moment then opened my eyes. She had, with tack-driving accuracy, drove her ice pick through some of my gear without hitting my body and nailed me to the ice, without injury.

I looked up to her and she gave me a wink. “Hey!... what if you had’ve hit me?” I gasped and she smirked.

“Would you rather me unhook you and let you fall?” she joked and I just grunted and snagged my own ice picks into the ice. Daring pulled hers free and let me go. I looked up to her. “Thanks,” I called out but she didn’t answer.

We continued up, and up… and up. Goddess it felt like it would never end. The clouds really hindered my view. It was like a dark fog. Suddenly however, without warning, the fog ended and the peak plateau was within a few dozen meters. We scrambled up to reach the peak.

Daring got there first and reached her hoof down to me and offered some help. I looked at her. I still kinda didn’t like her. She motioned with her hoof. “Come on… let me help you,” she offered. I hooked my ice pick to my gear then used my free hand and took her offer.

We both stood up and looked out to the horizon. The black clouds were opaque and we couldn’t see through them. The rising sun horizon looked beautiful. It cast a morning haze over top the plateau of clouds and even though it was fricken cold as an icebox… I felt this warmth inside me.

I remembered something and reached into my packsack, retrieving the small single lens camera Flim had given me. The brothers had wanted us to take a photo of the peak, so that they could sell it off.

“Hey Daring, say freeze,” I punned and snapped a picture of her before she was ready.

She looked at me. “Hey! Get rid of that. Nopony can know I exis-“ but I cut her off.

“Chill out. Nopony is gonna know it’s you beneath all that gear,” I chuckled. I took my mask off for just a brief moment and took a breath. It was so thin.

Daring snatched my camera and snagged a photo of me without my mask on. I brought up the Eagle Eye menu. Just a few meters over ten thousand. I slipped the mask back on. Daring handed me the camera back but I scoped her up to her hindlegs and snapped a picture of both of us.

I looked through the camera lens began snapping pictures. In an instant, I saw what we were after. “Is… that it?” I asked, already knowing full well the answer. On the middle of this little peak, was two tiny skeletal dragons, holding up a pedestal. On the pedestal was a perfectly preserved, untouched horn.

Literally, it was a horn, like a musical instrument. But not like a modern horn. More like the old war horns used by Vikings. I blinked and slowly approached it. “So this thing… is worth two hundred large to the museum?” I asked and she nodded.

Derreck squirmed up the edge of the plateau. “Ha-ha… aww dammit!” he yelled with a scowl. I looked to him and laughed.

“Looks like you’re buying dinner,” I joked and Daring looked to me with a weird stare.

“Why am I-“ but I cut her off.

“No, I wasn’t talking about you,” I told her. Derreck moseyed up beside us.

“Hot damn… so that’s what you guys have been after?” he asked and I nodded, though Daring didn’t even acknowledge him. She slowly pulled out a bag for it and gently set it inside.

I spoke out. “Think a giant boulder is gonna chase us?” I punned and she gave me a curious look. “Nothing,” I assured her and she quickly set the bag into her saddle bags. Derreck looked out.

“Man… sure is beautiful out here, get a picture of that, would yah,” he told me. I did as he asked and snapped off more photos of the scenery, along with Daring and myself and even one of the Dragon Horn.

With that taken care of, we decided not to overstay our visit, and quickly began back down the mountain. This time, rather than abandon me, Derreck stayed with us. We weren’t in too much of a rush but at the same time we were.

“Oh man… I can’t wait to get back home,” I said aloud, so that Daring could hear me. “First thing I’m gonna do is take a nice long, steamy hot bubble bath… then I’m gonna go out and get some fine lasagna with my mom and dog. My dog's name is Lassie, and she absolutely loves lasagna.” Daring didn’t say anything.

“So how bout you? Whatta you gonna do when you get back?” I asked in an upbeat tone.

There was a long pause as we continued down. Finally, after a few minutes, she answered. “Probably go on another adventure,” she stated. I joked around with her.

“Yeah, well just leave me out of it,” I laughed and she nodded.

“I know… you said you never wanted to see me ever again, and I’ll respect that,” she said and my heart sank a little.

“Well… I was just kinda joking around,” I told her, slightly apologetic in my tone. She didn’t say anything however and I felt a little bad. I had told her I never wanted to see her again when I was a little messed up in the head and didn’t fully mean that… or... well I had meant it but now I had changed my mind. Goddess I was getting soft.

We kept going down, quicker than we had gone up. Other than the gustering wind and rattling of our gear, there was total silence. We didn’t speak a word to one another.

Daring swung her ice pick into the ice but as she did, her footing gave way and she slipped. “DARING!” I yelled and reached down to her but she was far out of my reach. My own ice pick gave way and I fell as well.

Derreck leapt after me. “BURDY!” He yelled. The fall was pretty brutal. I skipped and tumbled along the side of the slanted mountain and after a few dozen feet of falling, we all crashed into a flat surface.

Daring yelped in pain while I yelled out, but Derreck just grimaced silently. “Ohhmguhm…” I cried out as I grabbed at my side. I think I just broke a rib. My leg jerked as I squirmed in pain, trying to hug my side which just made it worse.

Daring was weeping. I looked over to her. “Dar… Daring,” I whispered and began to crawl over. She didn’t say much as she tried to sit up but just fell over with a yelp of pain. “Daring!” I gasped as I got on my hands and knees and scurried to her side.

“It’s broken… gah! It’s broken!” she whined in pain.

“What’s broken? What’s broken?!” I gasped and she pointed to her leg.

“My leg… I think it’s a fracture…” she bit her lip, still whimpering in pain. My eyes went wide.

“Okay… okay I’ll just… I’ll just carry… ack!” I groaned as my chest ached in pain. She looked at me.

“No… no you can’t… you’ve busted something too, haven’t you?” she asked and I nodded.

“A rib… I think, it'll be fine though” I replied but as I tried to heave her up I involuntarily flinched and grabbed at my sides again. She just whimpered in pain.

“Oh goddess… oh goddess, I’m so sorry,” she began to cry.

“Daring, buck up! This isn’t you! You’re a brave adventurer. You always find a way,” I said but she just shook her head.

“You can’t carry me. You’ve got a busted rib and you’ll start to run out of oxygen and get pneumonia. Besides, you wouldn’t be able to carry me very well without some ropes to carry me on your back… we don’t have any ropes,” she said and I bit my lip as I yanked off my mask.

“No… NO GODDESS DAMMIT!” I yelled, tears beginning to flow from my eyes. “There… there has to be something… somehow,” I said but she shook her head.

“Think about it…” she trailed off and pulled off her own mask. “We’re both running low on oxygen, and you’ll just kill yourself trying to bring me down. Besides, you said yourself you never wanted to see me again… this’ll be a good way to make sure that happens,” she said but I yelled at her in response.

“Shut up Daring! I didn’t mean it! I'm a fuck up and say things I don't mean to! What the fuck is wrong with you?! This isn’t you? You don’t give up! You’d never let yourself just… die! Think of something,” I said but she shook her head.

I tried to pick her up but we both ended up yelping in pain. “Please… ahh… don’t,” she said in a hushed tone. I flumped my hands into the snow.

“No… no this can’t happen… it’s… it’s a dream right?” I pleaded. She just lay there, huffing to herself in pain.

“No… listen… I’m sorry-“ but I cut her short.

“Not now Daring, think of something!” I said furiously as I ran through all the options we had while stroking my hands through my hair in a fluster. She pulled off her glove and rested her hoof against my bare face.

“I’m sorry… about what I did. I’m sorry about dragging you along on this… but I won’t let you kill yourself in some hopeless attempt to save me,” she said but I shook my head. “No, seriously, listen to me!” she shouted. I stopped and she looked me dead in the eyes.

I looked to Derreck, maybe he could lift her?

My heart sank further as I noticed his left arm cradled. Shit!

Daring tugged my face so we were eye to eye. “Listen… I have nothing to live for. I just go adventure to adventure. I have no family… no friends… you said yourself. You have something to live for. A mother and dog to go back to, ponies who love you,” she said and I bit my lip.

“You’ve got parents too!” I yelled but she shook her head.

“They passed away when I was young. I was brought up by my mentor, Mrs. Applenathy,” my eyes went wide.

“Well she surely loves you!” I shouted but she nodded then just shook her head.

“Of course she does, but she also knows the dangers of the trade,” she stated. I bit my lip. Sure… I hated her… didn’t like her… she wasn’t all that bad… nopony deserves this kind of fate.

“I’ll make it down with you, or I’ll die trying!” I told her sternly but she shook her head and held her hoof firmly against me, holding me back.

“Don’t. I won’t drag you down with me. I’ve already done enough,” she said then smiled. “I know you don’t have fond memories of me so… please, for me, don’t remember me,” she said and Derreck rested his hand on my shoulder.

“I can’t…” I trailed off. “I can’t just let a pony die while knowing that I could’ve done something,” I said and Daring just sighed.
“There’s nothing you can do, nothing I can do… right now there’s nothing anypony can do. I knew that one day I’d die, but whether it be today, tomorrow or when I’m eighty… I never let it faze me,” she tried to offer some assurance but it didn’t work that well.

Derreck turned my face to him. “Listen… she’s right. I’ve got a busted arm, you’ve got busted ribs and she’s got a broken leg. Nopony here has ropes to tie her to either of us, and if you don’t get down to a lower altitude, you’ll probably catch pneumonia with the way your ribs are,” he stated.

I looked to Daring and she handed me a bag, the one with the Dragon Horn in it. “Here… get it to the museum,” she said and I looked to her.

“I’ll give your pay to a charity,” I said but she shook her head.

“Don’t… keep it. Like my final gift to you,” she said and I bit my lip. Why was she acting like this? She was supposed to be a strong upbeat adventurer that would never give up. Not some... fainthearted quitter.

“Dammit!” I clenched my fists in anger. “FUCK! IT’S NOT FAIR!” I yelled and Derreck pulled me along.

“Come on, we gotta go, we can’t stay here forever,” he said. Daring smiled and gave me a wave goodbye. No… no I wouldn’t let it be like this…

* * *

I had cried for the better part of an hour before my head got sore and my eye ran out of tears. Even my damaged eye managed to produce some tears which moistened the inside of my eye patch. Derreck helped me along as we descended the mountain. “You think… you think she’s still alive?” I asked and he just sighed.

“Sometimes... there’s nothing you can do. Just let it go and try not to think about it,” he said.

“But… it’s only been an hour and a half, maybe we could-“ Derreck slapped me across the face.

“GET A GRIP!” He boomed in my face and I was stunned. “Seriously, didn’t you hate that mare?!” he roared and I half nodded. “So what’s the big deal then?” he asked and I just rocked my head from side to side. “Listen, you can’t fucking go save everypony in the world. Shit, you can’t save ponies that just can’t be saved. Yeah, freezing to death on a mountain sucks, I wouldn’t wish it on most ponies, but it wasn’t your fault!” Derreck yelled and I bit my lip.

“Well… maybe if I had been closer to her-“ Derreck slapped me again.

“I was right there, right fucking there! There was nothing you could’ve done! Get over it!” He yelled and I fell to my knees, now in tears.

“I can’t... I can't okay! The whole time… she was trying to apologize for what she wrote, how she treated me… and I just gave her the cold shoulder… then she saved my life, and all she wanted was for me to forgive her and I didn’t. Now I couldn’t even save her life and she’s gonna die thinking…” I just trailed off. It wouldn’t even matter.

“But did you hate her?” he asked and I nodded.

“Well… kinda, yeah… at first but… I was just too stubborn to forgive her… goddess if only I could take it all back,” I whispered to myself but Derreck just heaved me up and began slugging along.

At this rate we’d…

We both stepped forwards through the deep snow but our feet kept going down. “OH SHI-“ was all we both managed as our bodies fell down through the snow.

We tumbled down, bouncing off a steep incline and rolling down powdery snow. Finally I slammed into the hard ground. I groaned in pain, wondering why I wasn’t dead. I looked up, and saw we didn’t just fall straight down, it was actually more like a tunnel we had rolled down.

“The snow must’ve coated over the tunnel entrance,” I whispered to myself. The cavern I was in was just barely illuminated by the small hole in the snow Derreck and I had created.

I turned to look for Derreck but was met by a grotesque face that was glaring at me with a crazed look. “GAH FUCK!” I screamed as I jumped back. In an instant however, I noticed that it was actually a pony, a stallion… who was sitting propped up against a wall. He must’ve froze to death some time ago… fuck what a harsh way to go… and his face is preserved in such an ugly pose… it must’ve been a long and painful death.

Derreck groaned as he stood up and wandered over to me. He swiped away the thin coating of snow over some big lumps in the ground. There was a bunch of old climbing gear with this dead guy, along with a little camp site set up. The cavern was well protected from the elements so only a thin layer of sparkling snow covered the floor, minus the pile of snow we had brought in with us.

“Who do you think he was?” Derreck asked and I just shrugged. “Gonna make a fuss over him and how you could’ve saved his life too?” he joked and I just shot him a glare. I wondered to myself just who he was.

I crawled over on my hands and knees, still in pain from my busted ribs. His body was rigid and still, and icicles drooped down from his nose. He must’ve been here a long time.

I slowly reached forwards and towards his chest. Just as I was about to reach his coat, I pulled my hand back. For some reason I swear… I thought he was just going to come to life with a horrifying screech and hiss… I probably watched too many movies as a kid. “Derreck… check his gear for… identification papers or something, anything we can use to find out who this guy was,” I said and Derreck looked to me.

“Why?” he asked.

“Because… because maybe somepony would like to know… maybe children or something,” I said and Derreck blinked.

“Didn’t the records say nopony survived?” he asked but I shook my head.

“No! They said nopony ever made it to the summit. Maybe this guy was just somepony who disappeared and the wife just wants to know for sure,” I told him and he rolled his eyes as he started rooting through the gear.

“You know… this is kinda like grave robbing… except this guy doesn’t have much to loot,” he joked. He tossed aside some things then sat back. “Jeeze… this guy doesn’t even have any food on him, what gives.” Derreck muttered.

I reached into the stallion’s coat and rooted around and quickly found something. I was a booklet… no, it was a journal.

I wiped a bit of fluffy residual snow off the hard cover and looked at it. It was just a plain-Jane hard covered journal… except the name on the front was Sir Archimedes II…

Author's Note

Yeah, it took me a long time to release this chapter and I feel kinda bad about it. But look on the bright side, it was a long as chapter. Now before anyone goes on saying that something I said about mountain climbing was wrong, I have no idea, not a clue, about mountain climbing other than you can die and freeze to death. I also know that winter temperatures on land in Canada can get a severe as most temperatures on Everest (Except the topmost part of the mountain during shit-storms)
I remember... I think it was two years ago actually, me and a buddy had the old SKSs out and were puttering off ammo fine but the Colt pistol wouldn't work... well, it kinda worked but kept stove-piping for some reason... the -40 degrees weather might've contributed to that, I'm not sure. Maybe the pistol was over lubbed and the lube started getting jelly-ish, who knows.
Anyways, cheers eh.

Chapter 37

'Letting go...'

'Sunday, September 5th, 1954,
I've finally done it! It took some convincing but I managed to assemble a group of highly trained mountain climbers to help me ascend to the peak of Mount Tia, along with funding from the museum for proper gear. We'll be the first ever pony expedition to reach the peak.'

'Tuesday, September 7th, 1954,
Ah... Mount Tia. Quite a story and equally interesting mythos behind it. Named after Equestria's regal princess herself... though apparently she didn't quite like the name. Something about a similarity with a nickname her younger sister gave her many hundreds of years ago. Ah, but regardless, the mountain is an untouched beauty, a gemstone in Equestria if you will. Unscathed by urbanization or otherwise and only ever traversed by dragons. And at the peak... that is what I'm after...'

'Monday, September 13th, 1954,
I do suppose it's been a little while. I did so mean to finish that last entry, I really did. Anywho, we've traversed by dogsled all the way to the bottom of Mount Tia. Legend has it there used to be a large city nearby, one of equal beauty to that of Canterlot... if one could believe that. Where was I? Oh yes, the peak. The Dragon's Horn, that's what they call it. A great relic of a past war, some many hundreds, or thousands of years ago. Nopony actually knows what war it was from, where it originated, or even if it really exists... just some foal's tale really.'

'Tuesday, September 14th, 1954,
We had to leave the dogs near the bottom of the mountain with Sprinkles. Couldn't risk them getting sick on us or running away... or even being eaten by something. It isn't hard really, climbing the mountain. One might expect it to be an impossible task but really... in just a day we've climbed well over a kilometer, I'm sure of it. The cold... it's bearable and it's still easy to breath.'

'Wednesday, September 15th, 1954,
I had an interesting conversation today with Toulouse, one of the best climbers on the team. He claimed to have done some research on The Dragon's Horn. The mere idea alone that one of the team members were even remotely interested in the artifact intrigued me. Though his story scared me somewhat. He said that it wasn't just any old artifact, it was some kind of... instrument if you will. Not really a weapon but apparently, according to him, it was... is, some kind of tool used to change the very outcome of battle, even if it's nearly certain that one side will win. The idea of it scared me enough to make me stop talking about it.'

'Friday, September 17th, 1954,
Sundance came down with a pretty bad cold today. Red, our team doctor, said it could be early pneumonia, and took him back down the hill. That just leaves Toulouse, Marshmallow and myself. Oh, I do believe this trip just got more difficult.'

'Sunday, September 19th, 1954,
We're nearing the top... I know it... I can feel it in my veins... or maybe that's the shivers I've been having... and the nausea in the morning. I do say... I've been feeling a bit under the weather lately, especially with this throbbing headache I've been having. I've been doing my best to keep it from the other two. They'd probably send me back down... and I won't... I can't go back down. I've made it this far, and I'm going to make it to the top. Be part of the first group of ponies to ever touch hoof on the peak of Mount Tia.'

'Monday, September 20th, 1954,
It's getting harder to breath, even with the air tank. It's so thin up here, it makes it hard to breath. I think the others know... I see it in their eyes. The way they look at me. They're probably going to send me back down, strip the glory away from me, slip it out from under my hooves... bastards, I won't let them.'

'Tuesday, September 21st, 1954,
I had a rather... dark conversation with Toulouse. He crept into my tent last night, which scared the living hell out of me because I didn't even stir in my sleep. It was only after he woke me up that I discovered his presence. He told me that we could retrieve the horn ourselves, tonight... leave Marshmallow behind and finish the climb. Said it'd only take a matter of hours if it was just the two of us. At first it was slightly tempting, but then when I said I'd tell Marshmallow so he wouldn't be worried if he woke up and we weren't there... Toulouse got aggressive, not physically but in tone... verbally. It was almost as if he wanted to do it in secret, not even tell Marshmallow. He then told me if we did it without him knowing, we could then ascend the final climb again with Marshmallow but The Dragon's Horn would be gone because we'd have taken it on the earlier climb. The when we got back we just tell everypony there was nothing up there, it was just a myth... then he offered me something I won't forget... offered to sell it to the underground markets... the dark ones, and split the profits between just the two of us. He told me The Dragon's Horn could be used to take over Equestria. Something about how it brings about the cursed spirits of dragons who died during the protection of this sacred land and that those spirits would answer to the demands of any who wielded this horn. He said he knew a buyer that'd pay four times what the museum was offering overall... that'd be a lot of money, more than any adventure I'd ever been on. But I'm not that kind of pony. I told him to forget about it, and never ever bring it up again.'

'Wednesday, September 22nd, 1954,
Argh... that son of a... son of a bitch! Ahh I'm such a fool! That son of a bitch Toulouse was working for Ahzrukhal. Oh goddess dammit... what did I do?! I should've told Marshmallow when I had the chance. Told him about Toulouse, and what he had told me. Together we could've stopped him.

That son of bitch. Toulouse helped me up over the edge of a cliff face we were climbing, but as Marshmallow reached up for his help, Toulouse simply kicked him down. He then turned his attention to me and hacked me in the side with his ice pick before leaving me for dead. I hope that stupid twat freezes to death.

I managed to crawl into some sort of... cavern... it's protected from the wind... but regardless I don't think I'll make it... oh goddess there's so much blood. I can see the exact path I took in here. It's like somepony splotched the trail I had been on with a pale of red paint. I... there's even blood on this journal... and in my lungs. I can feel it drowning me. I don't think I have much time left but I'll make myself clear to anypony who finds this journal...

DO NOT let Ahzrukhal get that horn. He would lay waste to most of Equestria with it, then rule over what's left, enslaving everypony beneath Celestia's sun. If by some act of god you manage to get the horn... don't even let the museum have it. Ahzrukhal would send goons to try and steal it... there'd be blood spilled that could've been avoided. Just... throw it down a crevice in this very mountain... or destroy it if you can. Something, anything... and, if you care to... tell my family I love them... and that I'm sorry I didn't spend more time with them. My final thoughts will be of them.'

* * *

Burdy's perspective,

I closed the journal and gently stuffed it into an inner coat pocket. “Arg!” I winced as a jolt of pain soared through my battered ribs. I reached up to my face with my left hand, but my left arm, namely my forearm, burned in pain. “Ahh!” I yelped and cradled my arm to my gut.

I used my right hand to reach up and slid my eye patch off for a moment to rub both my eyes. “Ugh...” I let out a groan of pain that trailed off into a mumble as I slipped the eye patch back on. Derreck looked to me, kneeling over.

“What's shaking?” he asked and I shrugged.

“Probably my ribs while I walk... I think they're busted ack! Hack! Gack!” I began to hack, viscous fluids along with slight traces of blood spitting up. Derreck looked to the spit glob then back to me.

“You gonna make it?” he asked and I nodded then stood up. I looked around the cavern for something...

Noticing a crevice, I walked over and looked down it. Derreck followed and looked down as well. “Hey... no need to get suicidal over her,” he said and I shot him a glare. “What?” he asked defensively.

I brought out The Dragon's Horn and looked at it. “This thing... it'll cause bloodshed over who wields it... even the museum can't keep it safe,” I muttered and Derreck looked me in the eye. I knew what he was thinking. Will I be selfish and do it for the money? Or toss it away and be further in debt? I coughed rather violently and gagged a little. “Goddess only knows the extent some might go through to get this thing...” I tossed the horn down the crevice and it quickly faded into the dark abyss. “It's better this way.”

I looked back towards the entrance. “Come on... we better... ahh... ack.” I began hacking again and Derreck slipped his right arm under my armpits and around my back, giving me leverage as he helped me along.

I was slightly delirious. I couldn't really keep my mind on track of anything, sometimes not even walking straight. I'd stumble and wobble, before Derreck would slap me, and hard enough to put my senses back into high alert.

As we continued along, Derreck would start asking me things... mostly silly things. Like what my name was, how tall I was, when I was born and even how old I was... the latter of the list kinda stumped me a little.

As I started drowsing a bit more he jolted, shaking me body in the process. “Who's your mother?” he asked. My good eye looked around to the endless storms of snow blizzards. He gave my body a bit of a shake. “Who's your mother?” he asked.

“Twilight... Twilight's my mother... Twilight Sparkle... she's my mom... mommy...” I muttered. He looked at me then rolled his good eye. His heavy facial scars were for the most part, concealed by the frost that had accumulated on his growing facial hair.

“Oh yeah... your mommy issue,” he muttered then kept hauling me down the mountain. We kept descending, but in my mind it felt like we were going in circles... or waves... or... something. Everything was starting to swirl around. Like I was stuck in a barrel rolling down a hill.

“Derreck... woah... I think I gotta... gonna puke...” I trailed off but no sooner had I, my senses all began to hype, spiking to an intensified alertness level. I could... smell something? My eyes went wide and both Derreck and I looked around.

As I turned, my world felt like it began spinning in three sixty motions. I quickly stumbled and fell forwards, Derreck however stayed on his feet, his nose twitching as he looked around with a terrifying stare, sniffing the air.

I saw a presence moving up behind Derreck, swinging something at him. Without even a warning, Derreck spun around, ducking as he pivoted on his heels. A machete was swung where his head had been just seconds ago. Derreck plowed his fist into the stallion's gut, winding him.

As the stallion staggered back Derreck delivered a mighty haymaker that spewed blood from the stallion's mouth. As the stallion's body hit the ground, blood began to leak from the stallion's left eye, the side that Derreck had struck.

Another stallion rushed at him and Derreck retrieved the dead stallion's machete and hacked at the stallion's head, lobbing it off. Blood spewed into the snow and soiled it just as another stallion lashed out at him with an ice pick.

Derreck ducked out of the way and the stallion ended up driving his weapon into ice and getting it lodged. Derreck went to finish him but spotted two more stallion's rushing him. Holding the machete in his right hand, he swung at the stallion on the right, swinging his bladed weapon from left to right with a smooth slicing action.

The stallion's jugular sliced open and spewed blood into Derreck's face. The second stallion on the left swung at him with a hatchet. Derreck grabbed at him with his busted left arm but still managed to hold the stallion's foreleg in place, stopping the swing.

He immediately swung down on the stallion's elbow and sliced his froeleg clean off. The baddy screamed in horror as he held up his stump, blood squirting out of it. Derreck looked back to the last pony. I looked too and noticed that it was the leader of the group from before, and these were the ponies that had been spared by Daring.

The stallion was still struggling to get his ice pick free and was jerking on it aggressively. As he jerked he took a quick glance to see how the fight was going but no more than a glance. There was a short delay before he looked again, an estranged look on his face, but he quickly resumed jerking on the ice pick as if he hadn't seen that all his stallions were dead.

Suddenly he slowly stopped jerking and took a longer look at Derreck, a look of shock on his face as he finally realized that his group had been slaughtered. Derreck, blood strewn all over his face, took a look at the stallion, a look that lasted a few seconds. He then smiled a most devious, sinister smile before speaking.

“Dare I say... that's one damn fine rope you've got.” I fazed out a little and all I really saw was a bunch of blurs. I also heard shouting but my mind couldn't piece it together. It was mostly the stallion screaming in agony and Derreck yelling things like 'You like this?! Take it bitch!' or 'You're lucky I'm in a good fucking mood!' and even 'Stop hitting yourself! Why you hitting yourself?' Then there was something about putting the wet end up his ass after beating him across the face with it. The last comment made me focus my eye a little.

I saw the blurry image of what looked like Derreck beating the stallion with a pony's leg. I then realized that Derreck had played rookie surgeon and had just hacked off the stallion's leg and was beating him with his own limb. “Oh... for fuck sakes...” I moaned as I tried to roll over. Another few seconds passed by and then there was silence.

Suddenly a pair of hands rolled me over onto my back, pulled down my pants and something sharp pierced my thigh. I gasped as I knew exactly what it was and tried to squirm away. “HEY, KNOCK IT OFF!” Derreck yelled as I felt something injected into me. Finally the needle head was removed and I began flailing around on the ground, screaming in phobic shock.

“Oh, knock it off you sissy... in a few seconds you're gonna feel energized,” he said and I looked to him. After a few moments my eye started to display a clearer image for me and my heart rate picked up. I could feel my eye go wide and my pupil shrink.

“Oh... holy shit... holy shit... HOLY FUCKING SHIT!” I gasped as I suddenly felt energized like the Energizer Bunny. “WHAT THE FUCK'D YOU GIVE ME?!” I gasped and Derreck looked at the needle.

“Epi... Epin... Epin-e-pur-her-ine?” he asked and I snatched the needle and looked at it.

“Epi-nep-her-in-ey?” I said aloud, trying to pronounce what the name said. “The fuck'd you give me?” I asked and Derreck blinked. “Derreck... what-the-fuck... did you stick in me?” I asked and he just shrugged.

“Artificial adrenaline. It'll keep you from being so dopey. He had some in his pack along with some ropes and other things that we'll need to save Daring,” he told me but the only thing I registered in my mind was that he stabbed me with artificial adrenaline.

“You gave me artificial fucking adrenaline? What if I had fuckin died? What if that shit fuck up my strawberry-” he slapped me across the face and dangled a spool of rope in front of my eye.

“Stuff to save Daring. And I stabbed you with it cause it'll keep you from passing out and going into a coma or some crazy shit like that,” he announced. I blinked... he had a rope... and some stuff to save Daring. I looked over to the mutilated body of the stallion group leader and flinched slightly. It was a pretty horrific scene. Despite what he had done... I don't know if he really deserved that.

I stood straight up and wobbled a bit. “Okay... okay let's go get our friend...”

* * *

Third person...

Daring laid there, vision blurring slightly as she lay up against a crusty lump of snow. She had tried to pull herself to safety but found that all but implausible. “Uhh... Daring... you've really done it this time...” she muttered to herself as she shook her head to try and get ride of the daze. "Come on... you can get out of this... you always find a way!"

“Uhh... oh I'm... tired...” she whispered to herself. She dipped her head. Knowing full well the dangers of falling asleep like this, she chose to embrace it anyways. “No... point in... prolonging it,” she said in a deflated voice. Her broken leg felt swelled and stiff, barely able to be moved.

Something sounded in the distance, sounding like heavy boots trudging through the snow. She looked up and saw a small glowing light, a yellowish orange light...

* * *

Burdy's perspective,

Moments earlier...

“DERRECK, I FOUND HER!” I yelled, the Eagle Eye picking up a life form and targeting it in red. The Eagle Eye glowed a yellowish orange tint as it ran. It was perfect really. Before it was weird having it cover just one eye, but now that I had lost the use of my left eye, the monitor display covered my entire field of vision. I rushed forwards, pain in my ribs urging me to slow down. As I neared her position, I tripped a little and fell down.

I let out a holler of pain but kept crawling towards her. The Eagle Eye did a visual scan of her and highlighted her broken leg in red, showing me an x-ray scan of her broken bone. “Daring... Daring...” I groaned as I dragged myself up to her.

I grabbed the back of her head with my right and cradled her body with my left, pulling her in tight. “Daring! Daring talk to me!” I yelled and she looked up drearily at me, exhausted eyes looking into mine.

“Wuh? Huh... Burdy?” she asked faintly. I looked back to Derreck who was just reaching me, having been walking a little slower and simply following me since I had the Eagle Eye.

“Derreck, do something!” I yelled and he nodded before pulling out a large needle.

He pointed to my Eagle Eye. “Give me that,” he ordered and I did as he said. He looked her over then suddenly pulled down her pants.

“What are you doing?!” I asked in shock just as Derreck jabbed the needle into her thigh. Daring flinched and jerked before trying to grab at the needle, but it seemed like she was in some kinda daze worse than the one I had earlier.

“Her blood is clotting excessively around the broken bone, probably due to the cold weather. This is blood thinner, it'll hopefully dissolve the clot and keep it from traveling to her heart,” he told me. My heart was still pumping at an alarmed rate due to the stuff Derreck gave me earlier, but I felt a shiver go down my spine.

I knew what blood clots could do to one's heart. One of my relatives died from something like that. I don't remember who it was, just that they were trapping or something in the wilderness. A blot clot traveled to their heart... or maybe they died of a heart attack... I can't remember now.

Daring was still dazy. “Give her some of that shit you gave me!” I ordered and Derreck shook his head.

“She might go into shock from the sudden burst of energy and have a heart attack, can't risk it,” he said and I gave him a furious look.

“So why the fuck'd you give it to me then?!” I boomed and he just shrugged.

“I knew your heart could handle it,” he stated then began pulling off some of the gear he'd filched from the stallion. “Drop off everything you don't need. Only keep a single tank of air, and some water.” Derreck ordered and looked through the backpack before pulling out a medical brace. He strapped it around Daring's leg, much to her pained discomfort.

He then quickly harnessed her body to his with the ropes. “Okay... your job is to keep her awake, let's haul ass!” Derreck yelled and began rushing down the hill. I quickly followed in tight pursuit.

Derreck would groan in constant pain, grasping at his sides and huffing for air. “Something wrong?” I finally asked and he nodded.

“Busted ribs... I think,” he replied while still scurrying along. “Hey... this eye thing is pretty cool. I can follow our exact path up here,” he said and I nodded. We continued to skimmer along but I quickly started dragging. The pain in my chest started to become to much to bear.

Liquids also started to build in my lungs and I found it nearly impossible to keep enough oxygen in my lungs, even with the air. It was like I couldn't breath deep enough. As we continued hurrying along, we were suddenly stopped by a steep dropoff.

“Aww... fuck!” Derreck yelled then looked to me. “Give me that fuckin' watch!” he yelled and I did as he asked. He strapped it on and pointed to the ground before pressing a button. A tranquilizer dart spat out. “FUCK! Wrong button!” Derreck yelled then pressed another button. A little harpoon attached to a cable shot out. He looked to me. “Get on my back and hold on!”

I did as he asked and he quickly began to repel down. I looked to Daring. “Hey... Daring... how yah feeling?” I asked and she looked to me drearily.

“You... you came back... for me,” she whispered. I nodded.

“Yeah... yeah of course I did,” I told her and she leaned her head forwards as our bodies kept decscending.

“Buh... I thaw... I thoughts you hated... me... an... never wanted to-” she began to slur and I cut her off.

“Forget what I said earlier. I don't hate you. I couldn't... I can't. You're my friend, and friends don't leave friends behind.”

Her head swayed side to side, still in a daze. “What... made you... change yer mines?” she was slurring.

“I... it doesn't matter right now okay!” I yelled and she looked to me.

“Ish... this the part... where you kissh me?” she asked in a daze and Derreck spoke up.

“WE COULD DIE! HARDLY THE TIME FOR ROMANCE!” With that he disengaged the repelling cable. We began to move at a fast pace again to which I nearly immediately fell behind.

“Derreck... hold on... ach, kack!” I began to heave heavily, horquing out globs of mucousy liquid from my lungs. Derreck stopped and returned to my side. We stopped for a few moments and untied Daring from Derreck's back.

“How yah feeling?” I asked and she just swayed her head around. “Come on... stay awake,” I said and Derreck passed me a water bottle. I took a swig before looking to Daring. “Hey... hey you need to drink some water,” I offered her some and she tried to reach for it but her depth perception must've been way off because her hooves missed the water bottle completely. I gently cradled her head in my good arm and slowly brought the water bottle top to her lips with my left.

I very gingerly began to trickle water into her mouth, slowly and not too much at a time. She slowly drank, and drank... and drank. After consuming roughly 500ml she stopped. “Enough?” I asked and she nodded.

“I've... I've been meaning to... say...” she huffed in effort to speak. “I'm so... so sorry for-” I cut her off, placing a finger to her lips.

“Not now, come on, we gotta hurry,” I told her. Derreck roped her to his back again and we began trudging down the mountain. As we descended, even at this pace I couldn't keep up and ended up collapsing and wheezing deeply, feeling as if I were drowning. Derreck stopped and hurried over to me.

“Come on! On your... feet!” he yelled, heaving me up, supporting me on his shoulder. I was starting to daze a little more. Derreck began to move along at a rate I couldn't match with the way I was. Truth be told I was surprised her could even maintain this rate. Being burdened down with both the weight of Daring and myself, added to his busted arm and ribs, he was hauling ass all things considered.

“Daring... nod if you're still okay,” I mumbled and she slowly nodded her head, though it looked more like she'd raise it then just let it drop.

Derreck spoke up. “Just another kilometer! And we'll be back at the truck!” He yelled, continuing to move at a rather fast past. As he moved along, he suddenly tripped, falling forwards and dropping me to do the same.

I merely groaned as he let out several curses. I wasn't ready to get up just then, I'd have rather just waited a moment, let my body relax, but Derreck had other things in mind. He heaved me up again, emitting a pained yelp from me as he began to race along again, still supporting both mine and Daring's bodies.

Amazingly, the whole trip down, Derreck showed no signs of fatigue, no signs of pain other than the odd grunt or groan, and absolutely no signs of stopping. He just kept going... like some kind of machine.

My mind fuzzed while my vision blurred. “Daring... say something,” I said, checking up on her. She mumbled something ineligible but at least I knew she was still alive. Suddenly Derreck stopped and I looked to him. “What?” I asked.

“Good news or bad news?” he asked and I thought about it.

“Bad news,” I said, wanting to get that over first.

“We... I... somewhere... somehow... someway-” I cut him off.

“Get on with it. Spit it out!” I exclaimed.

“Took the wrong path,” he said and my eye went wide.

“What... so where the fuck are we?” I gasped and he held up a finger as if to motion me to wait for him to continue.

“That's the good news,” he said, pointing down over the edge of a cliff. I looked down over the edge. About... a good hundred yards downwards, was base camp. Juggernaut was still partially visible, though mostly covered in snow.

“Oh... shit...” I crept back from the edge, a shivering tingly feeling going down my spine from being this high up. Derreck pointed the watch at the ground and pressed the button for the repel cable, but nothing came out. “What?! It's just a single use?!” He gasped and I slapped myself in the face.

“What else can we do?” I asked, then quickly began to scroll through the various options in my mind. Derreck pointed to a ledge across a gap.

“See that?” he asked and I looked over. The gap was a good six foot jump. Not bad if I didn't have busted ribs, and Derreck wasn't carrying Daring.

I shook my head. “No way... no way...” I kept shaking my head.

“It's either that or... we backtrack a few hundred meters then finish the ascent.” I just dipped my head. Daring coughed and hacked a little and I felt my own lungs filling with liquid again.

There was a short pause before I nodded. “Fuck... fuck... fuck! Fuckfuckfuckfuck... FUCK!” I yelled in distress. I just knew this was a bad idea. “Okay... fuck... before I change my mind,” I swore. We both quickly stripped just about all our clothing and gear except our pants and footwear, making ourselves lighter for the jump. I grabbed the camera and Archimedes journal from my coat and stuffed them into my pants to make sure I didn't lose the only evidence we had that we had successfully climbed Mount Tia. We left Daring bundled up in clothing, figuring she was bad enough as is. Derreck nudged his head towards the gap.

“Well... hurry up then... ladies first,” he joked. I tried to take a deep breath but ended up just hacking up more fluids from my lungs. Derreck patted me on the back, helping knock the crud from my lungs. Finally, I took a deep breath.

I rushed towards the gap and leapt, pushing off with all the force I could muster. Time seemed to slow for me as my gaze traveled to that of the ever terrifying drop below me. Finally my feet set down, a few inches past the edge of the ledge and due to my momentum, I fell forwards, crashing to the ground and tumbling along.

I groaned in pain but managed to look up as Derreck stepped back, then rushed forwards...

Time seemed to slow for me again. His right foot planted on the very edge of the gap ledge as he pushed off, launching the combined mass of both himself and Daring's body weights, into the air.

His legs flailed slowly in my perception of reduced time. He brought his right foot forwards to take a proper landing, but his eye went wide as he realized something, to which I quickly realized as well.

His foot landed just on the very edge of the cliff gap and the crusty ice gave way, crumbling beneath him. His feet scrambled to get a footing but the ice kept falling. “DERRECK!” I yelled, trying to scramble to my feet to help the duo.

The crumbling edge gave way and he fell with it, Daring strapped to his back. I rushed to the edge just as Derreck's bone claws extended from both hands, stabbing them into the ice, stopping their sudden descent.

His busted arm must've been excruciatingly painful because nearly immediately he yelped in pain and pulled his arm back, relieving the pressure on it while the claws retracted. However, all the weight was put onto his right arm, which kept them suspended.

Groaning, he kicked the spikes of his mountain climbing boots into the ice. He kept groaning, pulling his busted arm close to his chest. After a moment of pain, he dislodged his left boot and took a step upwards, then his right. After that he quickly swiped his right arm up higher and slowly pulled himself up.

“This... better be fucking worth it!” Derreck yelled, closing the final gap between himself and the edge. As he neared the top, I reached down with my right arm. He gritted his teeth and slapped his busted arm into mine with a roar of anticipated pain. We gripped the other's forearm with our hands and together pulled him and Daring up.

We both stood up, gasping in pain and coughing violently, namely from our busted ribs. “She... owes you... big time,” Derreck commented but I shook my head.

“No... this is me making up for being an asshole towards her,” I told him and he frowned before giving me a glare. I just looked away then looked around. We were on a small little ledge, there was no pathway down or anything. “Hey... what do we do now?” I asked, still looking around.

He pointed down the side of the edge. I looked down. It wasn't a complete drop, but a very steep decline. “Woah... fuck that... there is no way-” but he cut me off.

“Chill, it's only... about a sixty degree angle. You might not be able to walk down it but you can definitely slide.” I shook my head.

“No way, no way I'm gonna slide down that!” I exclaimed and Derreck just rolled his eyes.

“Oh yes you are.”

“Oh no I'm not,” I said with a shake of my head.

“Oh yes...” he trailed off and gave me a gentle push which started my fall. “You are.”

At first I simply started sliding down the decline, fluffs of snow blustering past me. Then the snow beneath me began to build up and I began to tumble and flop, flaring the pain in my busted ribs.

I managed to rearrange myself slightly but quickly ended up tumbling again. Suddenly the decline smoothed into a nice curve that brought me safely to leveled ground and I skittered to a stop. I groaned, body aching in pain, fluids filling my lungs.

My eye was sore from the cold and my skin itched from the freezing irritation. I looked up and saw Derreck gently and gracefully sliding down the decline with Daring roped to his back. He was sliding with such grace I swore he might've had a toboggan.

Derreck slid up next to me. “Woo! That was fun!” he said excitedly but I merely gave him an annoyed groan. He grabbed me by my waist belt and began to heave me along. “Come on, before we both get frostbite or something,” he said, in an upbeat tone. I began stumbling as he pulled me along.

We finally reached Juggernaut and Derreck made quick worked to brush the snow off the doors, namely with his bare forearms. He cracked open the door and pulled me into the back, slamming the door behind him.

Unroping Daring, he looked to me. “Make sure she stays awake,” he ordered me. He rushed to the front of the vehicle and tried to turn it over. But alas, much like I had feared, the vehicle didn't want to run.

He tried again, and again. “Come on Betsy... come on!” Derreck shouted. The engine sounded as if it wanted to turn over but kept on sputtering, having difficulty creating the power needed. “COME ON YOU PIG!” Derreck yelled.

“Juggernaut, her name is Juggernaut,” I told him. He kept swearing at the truck.

“Hurry up you pig. In a second I'm gonna pour ether down your gullet and you really won't like me then you-” he was cut off as the truck engine finally puttered to life. It sounded really, really rough. Almost like an old Ford tractor with a pooched fuel filter.

“HA-HA! Success!” Derreck yelled before cranking the air heater. He rushed back to me. “Alright, in a few minutes it's gonna start getting warm. You're gonna have to start getting her clothes off,” he ordered and I looked to him.

“What, why?” I asked, stunned by his request.

“When it gets warm her clothes are gonna thaw out and they're gonna be damp and cold,” he stated. “Now hurry up and get her clothes off!” he ordered sternly.

I quickly started stripping off her clothes while Daring muttered things, mostly incoherently. After stripping her down I looked away and Derreck looked to me. “Something wrong?” he asked and I nodded.

“I just... stripped her...” I said bashfully and he rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, so? You'll be helping to save her life,” he said as he began rummaging through the truck.

“So... so she's naked now,” I said and he rolled his eyes.

“How many ponies do you know that are usually naked?” he asked and I looked away timidly.

“Well... it's different cause...” I didn't really have a definite answer. It was just weird because it was Daring. I just remembered her as having clothes and it was more of a... privacy matter.

“AH-HA!” Derreck announced as he pulled out a big blanket, one of the extra ones we had left behind in the truck, thank goddess. He quickly bundled Daring up in the blanket then rubbed his hands together to create friction warmth. “Not much else we can do...” he trailed off and looked to me.

“You might wanna ditch your pants and crawl in there with her,” he said and I looked to him with a disgusted look but he merely let out an irritated groan.

“Not like that you dunce. I meant for body heat. You've both lost a lot of it and you might be coming down with pneumonia, judging by the fluids that keep building in you lungs,” he stated.

I shook my head. “No way... She can have the blanket, ack... kack!” I began to horque up globs of fluids again. Derreck slapped me upside the head.

“Enough with this moral compass privacy crap. You're getting in that blanket!” he told me. He lifted the blanket and motioned for me to get underneath it. I just frowned but finally obliged and crawled underneath, though I stayed as far as I could from Daring. Not out of rudeness or anything like that. I just felt so... uncomfortable. We were both naked, and being on death's doorstep the last thing I should've been thinking about was that, but I still was.

After another few moments Derreck began playing with the instrument controls on the vehicle. “Battle truck, nearest hospital!” Derreck ordered.

“Her name is Juggernaut,” I told him. Daring mumbled to herself, still in a daze.

“Who's jugs not?” she whispered, tilting her body a little. “It's warmer in here... are we home yet?” she asked, probably speaking her mind without filtering it.

The truck monitor spoke back. “Crystal Empire hospital, ETA... fourty minutes,” the truck spoke in a female Aussie accent. Derreck scowled.

“Make it twenty!” he boomed but the truck didn't reply and quickly began a quick descent of the mountain. Derreck quickly climbed into the back cabin and looked out the back window which was a bit clearer since some of the snow had been blown off from the vehicle's speed.

He gave the scenery the middle finger. “FUCK THIS MOUNTAIN!” he swore. As the truck bumped along in some kind of autopilot, Derreck simply watched through the back window while I lay on the floor with Daring, trying to keep still as to minimize the pain from my chest.

As we continued along, Daring's fur brushed up against me. It felt warm, but I immediately tugged away in timidness. She was warm though... and the floor was awfully cold. Slowly, and rather sheepishly, I snuggled a bit closer to her, just barely touching the tips of her body fur.

Daring mumbled something, incoherently I think, but I couldn't understand it. Suddenly she rolled over, flopping her forelegs over my body and snuggling into me, muttering something about a warm puppy dog.

The embrace scared me at first but the warmth quickly overtook my timidness about the idea of us being this close under a blanket while both naked. Derreck looked solemnly out the window.

“Was it worth it?” he asked and I pointed to my pants where the journal lay. He shook his head. “It's not what I meant... I know what would've become had we brought that thing back... I meant all this... the entire adventure? All those who died before us... and for what?” he asked and I rocked my head back into the cold floor.

He was right in some respect. All I had really accomplished was sneaking away behind my mother's back, climbing a dangerous mountain, throwing away the dangerous treasure and now not only was I in debt with Rarity but Flim and Flam as well... at least Rarity still didn't know it was me who trashed the boutique.

All I had to show for this was some busted ribs, a couple photos and some dead stallion's journal. “I don't know... only time will tell,” I replied. I continued to lay on the floor, trying my best not to move. Not generally due to the fact it hurt to move, but namely because if I laid in one spot long enough, my body would heat that part of the floor but when I moved I could never find that perfect spot again.

The windows thawed a bit and I could see the scenery, though it was dull and eerie. The outside skies were dark with gray storm clouds. I just kept watching the sky while holding Daring close. Derreck kept watching through the back window, a gloomy face staring out to the emptiness of snowy plateaus.

Finally the truck started to slow as we reached the borders of the Crystal Empire. “Juggernaut, blow right through it. We don't have time to stop!” Derreck ordered and the truck obliged, revving up the engine and driving head on through the gates. Guards yelled out for the vehicle to stop but it just kept going, but thankfully avoided hitting anypony.

As soon as we entered the city, the truck was met with smooth cobblestone and pavement rather than the harsh snow conditions. The automated voice of Juggernaut spoke up. “Deactivating enhanced traction,” she said just as the spikes in the tires retracted.

Picking up a higher speed, the vehicle raced through the streets, pursued by guard ponies. Finally reaching the hospital, the vehicle came to an abrupt stop. Derreck flung the back door open. “Come on, get Daring!” he ordered in haste.

Ever so painfully, I stood up and cradled her in my arms, though with busted ribs and a broken arm, it wasn't easy. I managed to step out of the vehicle but we were immediately surrounded by guard ponies.

Derreck cocked his right arm back as if to ready a punch, but held his left arm forwards, both fists clenched. “We need a doctor!” he ordered but the ponies didn't back off. Immediately afterwards, his bone claws extending with a gruesome squelching sound cause by the blades slicing through his skin. He let out a petrifying roar as blood dripped from his wounds and the guards deterred slightly. “This guy is Princess Twilight Sparkle's faithful student... and her son... now back the fuck off or I'll cut my way through you!” Derreck roared.

One of the guards spoke to another and they let us past but still followed us in. Derreck retracted the claws in his left hand and pointed to somepony in nurse fatigues. “These two need a doctor, they're in critical condition!” Derreck boomed. However, as soon as she saw his bone claws still protruding from his right hand, along with the blood, she simply screamed.

Ponies frantically hurried away, fearing the worst. I looked around, Daring now ready to pass out. “Can somepony get my friend a doctor, SHE'S DYING FOR CELESTIA'S SAKE!” I yelled. Nopony really answered me. I guess we were pretty frightening.

I looked over and saw a stretcher. Quickly rushing over, Derreck in quick pursuit with the guards staying cautiously back, we set her on the stretcher. “Doc... DOC!” Derreck yelled then pointed to one of the guards. “Get this mare a doc for fuck sakes!” he roared and the guard rushed over to a counter and spoke to the hiding receptionist.

After another few moments a doctor arrived, though obviously very frightened. “Please... please don't kill me,” he pleaded as he cautiously took control of the stretcher and began pushing it along.

I turned to Derreck. “Retract the claws,” I told him and he did as asked. I turned to the doctor. “Sorry about the scare... it's just we didn't have much time,” I told him as we went along, though I was staggering painfully.

“What in Equestria were you two doing?! You look awful,” he stated and I smirked.

“We climbed Mount Tia,” I replied and he looked to me with shocked eyes then returned his gaze to that of where he was pushing the stretcher.

“Really? No lie?” he asked and I nodded.

“I have pictures...” I collapsed suddenly, hacking and wheezing, barely able to breath. The doctor stopped. “Just get her to a room... and hurry!” I yelled then sucked back and began coughing violently. Derreck came to my side and heaved me up, supporting my body weight and helping me along.

Finally getting her to an emergency room, the doctor turned back to help me and at that point I merely collapsed out of Derreck's hold and onto the floor, passing out quickly afterwards...

* * *

Third person...

Princess Cadence and Prince Shining Armor arrived at the hospital, having heard the news and were met by a large squadron of guards. Shining was the first to speak. “What's going on?” He asked, noticing the profuse amount of blood that trailed away down the hallways.

The leader of the squadron stepped up. “Well sir... uhm... we really don't know,” the stallion stated, a little bit emberessed.

Shining looked to him with a most peculiar gaze. “What do you mean: you don't know?” he asked and the commander scratched his head.

“Well... uhm... this... this... motorized carriage looking thing crashed through our border gates without stopping so naturally we pursued it. Strangely enough, it stopped at the hospital and this... creature stepped out and threatened us with claws saying it needed a doctor,” he said but Shining cut in.

“Wait... what do you mean claws?” he asked and the stallion gulped.

“Uhm... well I... the creature-” but Cadence cut him short.

“Please, do stop calling him a creature. He is my sister in law's private student and she cares for him very much,” she ordered in a gentle tone that could have easily been mistaken for a request.

The commander nodded then looked back to Shining. “The... student... it had claws, they could retract and extend through its knuckles,” he stated and Shining nodded. “Then we got them a doctor and they were rushed off but the crea... student collapsed,” he informed the former captain, now pronounced prince.

Cadence gasped. “What on earth happened to him?!” she asked and the commander shrugged before offering her some pictures.

“These were procured from the thing they were driving, along with a journal. We had to devolope the photos but... ma'am... I think they did it,” he said and Cadence looked at the photos, her eyes going wide with realization.

“Is this... did they really...” she trailed off and the commander nodded.

“Ma'am, if our suspicions are correct... they climbed Mount Tia, right to the top and subsequently made it back down safely,” he stated.

Cadence looked to Shining. “Send a letter to Twilight immediately, she needs to know!”

* * *

Monday, June 16th, 2014...

Twilight had received the letter a mere day and a half after it had been sent, and she had immediately boarded the first train to the Crystal Empire, along with her friends which included Lassie and Spike.

Shortly they would be arriving at the train station. Twilight's hoof tapped erratically and Lassie just rolled her eyes. “Chill out princess, he's fine,” Lassie said and everypony gave her a stare, some a little angry, others slightly worried while some were just confused.

Twilight looked to Lassie. "You've been telling me that for a month Lassie, A MONTH! Kept saying it was nothing and 'oh he'd be fine'! Well look where that's left him!” she scorned the dog who simply sighed.

“Okay seriously, listen to yourself. You're talking about Burdy here. The most bad ass person in the history of Equestria. Dude... Applejack,” Lassie began pointing to the farmer pony. “Who was it that rushed into the burning abyss that was your family farm to save your little sister?” she asked, though the question struck a deep emotional nerve with the farmer as she remembered it was Burdy that went in to rescue Apple Bloom, not herself.

Breaking the silence, Lassie spoke up again. “Burdy, yeah... that crazy, stupid, dense motherbucker rushed right into a burning building, and saved a little filly but was severely burned to the point he probably looked like a burnt bubbling marshmallow of flesh,” she said, keeping it somewhat PG-13. “And you know what? Like a week later he's out screwing around and helping ponies again, and you know why? Cause the guy's like... like... like a super human or something... he's like Supermare but not a pony and he's a male... he's like Superman, but dense as a rock and utterly stupid like a cow,” she informed the group.

“So yeah... maybe he's in the hospital. Maybe he's busted up. But I'd be willing to bet that in a few days he'll be his same old self again,” she assured the group. The train came to stop and the group wasted no time in rushing towards the hospital.

As they arrived, Lassie took note that Juggernaut was parked out front. 'Son of a bitch must've been working for Flim and Flam again,' she thought to herself. The group entered the hospital. There were only two guards, along with the royal couple.

Twilight rushed up to her elder brother who immediately embraced her into a hug. “Where is he?” Twilight asked worriedly, fearing the truth.

“Twilight he-” Shining began but Twilight cut him short.

“I don't want to hear it. I need to see him with my own eyes!” she began to tear up.

Shining drooped his head. “Okay... doctor?” he asked and a doctor came over then began to lead the group upstairs. As he led them along, he began to speak.

“Ma'am, he came in with-” but Twilight cut him short.

“I don't want to hear it... please, just let me see him for myself,” she said and he nodded. Finally reaching the room, he opened the door to the dimly lit room. On the opposite side of the room to the door, lay Burdy, his left arm in thick bandages and his bare chest wrapped in medical tension wrap.

A monitor was hooked up to him and displayed a slow heart rate. Twilight nearly dropped to her knees. The doctor spoke up. “Ma'am he-” but Twilight didn't answer and just rushed to his side.

She quickly squeezed him tightly. “Don't you die on me!” She began to weep, but no sooner had she grabbed him and said that, his heart rate spiked and he shot up and out of her grasp.

“AHHHH! TOO TIGHT, TOO TIGHT!” He yelped in agonizing pain and Twilight looked to him in shock, Burdy returning her look with an equally shocked expression.

“Mom... you're... you're here,” he said in disbelief. She blinked and looked at him before pummeling his chest with her hooves.

“You jerk! You jerk, youjerkyoujerkyoujerk YOU BUCKING JERK! You promised never to do something dangerous like this ever again!” she yelled. Burdy squirmed in agonizing pain, Twilight having not known about his busted ribs.

“Ahh... ahh okay, ahh I give!” Burdy yelped then simply rolled himself off the hospital bed, pulling out the monitor needles that checked his pulse. With no pulse to check, the monitor emitted the flat-line beep. Within seconds several nurses and doctors were in the room. The doctor in the room waved them away, signaling everything was okay for the moment.

Twilight cornered Burdy, tears flowing from her eyes. “How could you do this?! How could you break your promise?!” she asked in a heartbroken way.

“Wait, just let me explain!” the man gasped. She stopped for a moment...

* * *

Burdy's perspective,

Hours earlier...

I awoke with a pained gasp and looked around. Last I remembered I had collapsed. I looked around and noticed an empty bed beside me. It looked like it had been recently occupied.

A doctor soon entered the room. “Hello... uhm... please, don't feel threatened, I'm just coming to check up on you,” he offered in a sincere tone. I relaxed and he stepped up towards the side of my bed.

“Where's my friends?” I asked and he looked over to the other bed, letting out a depressed sigh.

“Sir... I'm sorry but she didn't make it,” he informed me and my eyes went wide. After all that... after all we had done... “Oh... before I forget...” he trailed off and rushed over to his cart that had a few items on it.

He brought over a letter, entitled 'Mr. Burdick'. “They said not to let anypony but you read it,” he said. I ripped it open. The letter wasn't all that long.

'Dear Mr. Burdick,

You created some ruckus in the Crystal Empire upon your arrival. Our contacts in the museum there confirmed Daring's presence and retrieved her from the museum to be treated by a private doctor of ours. Please do understand that her identity cannot be known to the public. We had our contact help fake her death and told the doctors that she was a terminally sick mare who's dying wish was to ascend to the peak of Mount Tia, a wish which you helped her succeed. Unfortunately this adventure was too straining on her body and she died shortly after.

Mr. Burdick, not only are you going to be known as a generous man for helping fulfill a dying mare's final wish, but you're probably going to become an icon for the press, being part of the first ever pony expedition to reach the peak and return. Just warning you now, you may be flocked by media reporters

We have also retrieved Sir Archimedes II's journal as it is of historic value to us. We do wish you the best in your travels.

Yours truly,
Mrs. Applenathy'

I looked through the ripped envelope then to the doctor. The letter said the journal was worth something... so where the hell was my money? “Did they leave me any money?” I asked and he shook his head with a somewhat confused look.

A sudden realization hit me. She had played me again... played me the whole time. Acted sincere and nice, like she was truly sorry. “THAT FUCKING BITCH!” I yelled and shredded the letter into pieces. The doctor was shocked and somewhat fearful as he took a cautious step back.

I looked to him and simply sighed. “Don't worry... it's... it's nothing.” I dipped my head into my palm. 'That stupid two timing, lying, fucking whore!' I thought violently to myself. By goddess the next time I saw her I was gonna gut her...

* * *

Present time...

“Alright... okay... there was this mare... she really liked Daring Do,” I said, and immediately I had caught the attention of Rainbow Dash. “She really liked her adventures and stuff,” I said and Twilight gave me a narrow gaze.

“And she had been diagnosed terminally with a disease, it was gonna kill her and there was nothing the doctors could do,” I lied. Twilight continued to stare me down, like the angry mother that she was. “Her dying was was to climb Mount Tia-” I said and Twilight bellowed in.

“So you just mindlessly tried to help some random mare climb a mountain that has never been climbed before?” she interrogated and I gulped.

“Nopony... has climbed it before. See... I'm not a pony so I should be able to climb the mountain... at least that's how she explained it.”

Lassie spoke up. “Like I said... he's retarded,” she mentioned and I just rolled my eyes from the familiar voice of my ever quirky canine friend.

“Yeah... anyway, so she explained to me that she was dying and nopony would help her... and... well... you know. What could I say. Her dying wish was to see the beautiful unscathed elegance that was the peak of Mount Tia,” I said and Rarity nearly burst into tears as she flopped herself against me.

“Oh darling, that is so heroically courageous and eternally generous!” she said in a very feminine tone as she squeezed me.

“GACK! GAHHHHH! RARITY TOO TIGHT!” I yelped and she immediately pulled away. I looked to them, then to just Twilight. “I know I promised... I know I screwed up... you don't have to forgive me or even understand why I did it... just hear me out. She didn't have much time, and we didn't mindlessly go up. Flim and Flam helped her too, giving us the gear we needed to go up,” I said and Applejack gave a frown, obviously not impressed that we had been helped by the brothers... but who could blame her really.

“You could've died!” Twilight chimed and I nodded. Before I could speak, the doctor cut in.

“Actually... I've been meaning to talk with somepony who really... knows him. Uhm...” He walked forwards with some papers, mostly x-rays.

“He arrived a few days ago as you already know, but since that time has made an unnaturally rapid recovery,” he stated, offering Twilight a few of the x-rays.

“He had several broken ribs, five overall. Two on his left side and three on his right. His left forearm also had fractured bones. His right lung was collapsed and his left lung was slightly pierced by a broken rib. He also had pneumonia, very severe pneumonia at that... ma'am I have no idea how he even survived let alone walked into the hospital and made it as far as he did before collapsing,” he stated and Lassie spoke up.

“Superman,” she quipped and I just rolled my eyes. The doctor spoke up again.

“Actually... that's the least of this... bizarre case. Ma'am, these were taken a day and a half later...” he offered Twilight more x-rays. Twilight looked them over before the doctor spoke. “His arm had healed completely and his pneumonia had completely vanished without a trace. Some of his ribs had realigned and were already healing.” He brought out a final batch of x-rays.

“These were taken about eight hours ago. Ma'am... he shows no signs, other than some minor discomfort, that he had been severely injured. Is this normal?”

Lassie spoke up. “Oh yeah dude, he does this kinda stuff all the time. Like I said, he's Superman,” she said with a wink. The group looked to her and she just shrugged. Namely, Cadence and Shining gave shocked expressions, having never seen a talking dog before.

Twilight stood up and wobbled. “I just... I just need to sit down... I think... I don't know what to think...”

* * *

Hours later...

Her face, that betrayed look. It had been sitting on me all night. Dash thought it was totally cool that I had gone all the way to the top and was even more intrigued by the pictures. Rarity was all kook-koo about it, thinking I was some great gentlecolt for what I had done and was all lovey-dovey towards me. Applejack didn't have much to say, probably cause I had broken my promise to Twilight. Pinkie and Fluttershy didn't have much to say and were their usual selves. But Twilight...

She was so gloomy. Almost as if I had stabbed her in the back. Technically I guess I had. I looked to my watch which had been retrieved from the vehicle along with some of my other belongings before it was moved out of the way by Lassie since nopony else knew how to work it and the fact it had been built with some sort of magic resistant steel meant no pony could move it with magic... Flim and Flam were genius bastards.

It was just a few minutes past midnight. I snuck up and out of bed. Luckily enough I was no longer hooked up to the monitor so nopony would know if I went for a midnight stroll. The nurses did periodic checks every... about twenty to thirty minutes. So I had around a half an hour.

I slipped out the door and through the hallways like a shadow. Like the doctor had been, I was surprised at my body's recovery rate. I couldn't even tell I had been injured anymore. No broken bones, no bruises, not even aching pains.

I slipped into the visitor section where the group had stayed for the night. I remember Rarity making a fuss about being in the Crystal Empire with royalty yet having to sleep in a hospital visitor room.

I slipped into the visitor overnight room and immediately Lassie's head poked up and she looked at me, almost as if she were a guard dog. “Lassie... it's me,” I whispered and she smiled then came over panting happily.

“Hey, you're out of bed,” she said, and though it wasn't loud it sounded deafening due to the fact everything else was quiet. I motioned for her to hush, putting a finger to my lips.

“I need to talk to mom,” I said quietly and she nodded. I crept over to my mother who was dozing though it looked like she was having a bad dream. She was stirring constantly and her legs were twitching as if she were running to something... or someone.

I gave her a gently nudge... then another. On the third nudge she awoke with a gasp. I brought my finger to her lips. “Mom, sssh... sssh... it's okay,” I hushed her. At first she was shocked to see me, but quickly returned to the mood I had last seen her in.

“Evan... what do you want?” she asked, almost like she didn't want me to be there.

“Mom... I need to talk to you,” I said but she turned away. I bit my lip.

“Haven't you done enough talking?” she asked and I drooped my head.

“Okay... yeah I fucked up but please... can we just talk?” I asked and she looked to me, and there was a long pause.

“Well?” she asked and I shook my head.

“I mean... somewhere else,” I said and Twilight huffed, rolling her eyes and reluctantly getting up to follow me. Lassie came to follow but I waved to her. “Just me 'n' mom,” I told her. She obliged while Twilight and I walked away.

I led her outside to the front of the hospital. I turned to her. “Okay... yeah I know you're probably pretty mad... and that's putting it ligthly-” Twilight cut me off.

“I'm not so much mad as I am... you hurt me. You lied. You said you wouldn't get into these things if you could avoid it,” she said, tears coming to her eyes again. I sighed.

“I know... I know. I fucked up, just please... please hear me out. I can't bear to go on without you-” but she cut me off.

“So why didn't you think about that before doing this?” she asked. “Evan, I love you with all my heart but... I can't... if you keep going on all these wild adventures what's to say one day you'll never come back and I'm just left alone, wondering what happened to you?” she asked and I sighed.

“Okay... I know, but please, just let me tell you the truth,” I said and she rose an eyebrow. “There was never a terminally sick mare-” but she immediately cut me off.

“SO YOU JUST WENT UP THERE CAUSE YOU FELT LIKE IT?!” She gasped and I flinched from her sudden outburst.

“Hold on, let me explain!” I pleaded. “I'll start from the beginning.” I settled and took a deep breath. “Okay... remember Batlimare? With Freeze?” I asked and she nodded slightly. “Alright... well... while you were all frozen, I met Discord... then we decided to come rescue you but... well... my friend Derreck busted down Rarity's doors to get us some clothes-” Twilight cut me short.

“But it was cold in Baltimare and Rarity said most of the things stolen were finely tailored suits and dresses,” she announced and I nodded.

“Yeah... well Derreck said it might be the last suits we ever wear and we all figured... well if we failed and Freeze took over Equestria... then paying Rarity back wouldn't exactly be a huge issue.” I said but Twilight shook her head.

“What does this have to do with Mount Tia?” she asked and I sighed.

“Okay... Rarity still doesn't know about the boutique. I SWEAR I'VE BEEN MEANING TO TELL HER! Seriously... I just... don't really have any money to pay her back yet and... okay, I'm gonna sound insane...” I said but amazingly Twilight listened.

I took a deep inhale. “Daring Do... is real...” I said and Twilight looked at me, blinked and waited for me to continue. “We've met before and she came up with this brilliant plan that because I'm not a pony I could climb the mountain. I know it was retarded, believe me I didn't want to go... but she offered me a hundred thousand bits... and I conned her into giving me a hundred and fifty thousand,” I told her and Twilight's eyes went wide.

“So... because I didn't have much money... I agreed to go. I didn't tell you because I knew you'd flip out-” Twilight cut me short.

“Of course I would flip out!Why wouldn't I flip out?! Evan that mountain is dangerous and ponies die all the time trying to reach the summit!” she exclaimed and I nodded.

“Yes I know but... I didn't do it for myself... I did for Rarity. I wanted to pay her back,” I said and Twilight huffed.

“Evan, you could've just told Rarity and apologized. Coming from you she'd have accepted an apology as enough,” she informed me. I sighed.

“But to me that wasn't enough,” I told her and Twilight dropped her head with a depressed exhale.

“Evan... I just... I don't know. I've loved you... harboured a crush for the longest time but... I just... if you keep this going... I don't want to lose you. I can't bear the thought. Every moment you're off for an extended period of time, I worry about you,” she said and I nodded.

Somewhere... deep inside. I felt something. Something warm... cuddly... like everything would be okay. I have no idea what it was, and have never felt it before in my entire life. “I give up...” I said and she looked to me. “It's over...” I said and she gasped, holding a hoof over her mouth.

“Are you... are you... leaving me?” she began to cry and my heart skip a beat as I lurched forwards.

“NONONONONO! THAT'SNOTWHATIMEANT!” I sputtered. And she looked to me, still on the thought I was breaking off our relationship. “I meant... I'm over... I'm done... done this... this life...” I said but she was still unsure what I had meant.

I flumped down and leaned the back of my head up against the wall. “It was a thrill... the excitement of nearly dying kept me from remembering my past... kept me in the moment... made me feel alive... honestly, I don't know why I did what I did... maybe because I could... I don't know. I was afraid of this world... afraid to accept that I'd never see my own kind again... never see my home...” I looked to the stars.

By goddess, Luna... they were so beautiful tonight. The Aurora Borealis was out... or maybe it was called something different in this world. “They're beautiful... more beautiful than anything the day has to offer...” I muttered and Twilight looked to the sky and snickered.

“Just don't let Celestia hear you say that,” she giggled and I shook my head.

“So... I was... I couldn't let myself... my old world morality... couldn't let it go. I had the distant hope... a flickering light that maybe... somehow... one day... I'd find a way home...” I whispered. Twilight leaned into me with a hug.

“Evan, I am so sorry about bringing you here...” she apologized but I shook my head and held he chin so we could be face to face.

“Never... ever, feel sorry for bringing me here...” I trailed off and we leaned into a kiss, sealing our lips together. After a moment I pulled back. “I... I may not fit into this world perfectly... but... I want to live the rest of my days here...” I looked her dead in the eyes, as if looking into her soul. “With you.”

She smiled brightly, cheeks turning a hue of red. “I'm sorry I lied to you... but I just... well... it was thrilling and something I thought I couldn't live without... but after seeing you... seeing how I had hurt you... I realized it's something I can't live with... not if it does that to you.” She blinked, he mouth slightly agape.

“Evan... are you saying...” she trailed off and I nodded.

“I want to-” I bit my lip. I couldn't believe I was going to say this. “I wanna settle down in life. Leave my old life behind... make you happy,” I told her and her smile... it made everything perfect.

We sat for a while longer before I sat up and offered her my hand. “Come on...” I said and she took my hand. “Let's go for a walk... maybe watch the northern lights.” With that, we walked away, arm in arm. Our feet/hoofsteps echoed in the quiet night of the city. Our bodies were gently illuminated by both the northern lights and the dimly lit street lamps. I think I could get used to this life...

Author's Note

See... well, actually I didn't really know where I was going with this story when I started and I still don't really know how it's going to end (It's reaching the end though). I figured I'd make him a brash asshole who rarely listened, but then as I was writing it, the story took a new path where he was screwy in the head and had mommy issues. I'm not gonna say spoilers cause I think most people have figured out that he suffers abandonment issues.

But anyway, it's fun because in most stories the protagonist has to rise up to the challenge, become someone strong or build up their skills to take an adventure on. Whereas Burdy, he was physically fit, tactically aware, near superhuman senses... the man was, as cited by some people, a Mary Stu. But... his story transgressed more into a story where this guy has all the stuff he needs to take on any adversary but instead is slowing down in life and now is trying to settle down completely... it's kinda interesting.

Chapter 38

“Just bending the truth...”

Ponyville Library,

Thursday, June 19th, 2014...

I awoke to silence, mostly silence anyway. A warm presence beside me put a glowing smile on my face as I realized my arm was trapped beneath her. I snuggled in tightly to my mother for just a brief moment.

It was a little creepy sure, sleeping with my mother, but... it just made me feel all cozy and warm inside. However, no matter the feel of warmth, love or otherwise, I needed to relieve myself.

I slowly and gently slid my arm out from underneath Twilight's body and stood up. I only had my boxer briefs but for the time being that would be decent enough. Slowly moseying my way downstairs, I hummed to myself as my body begged to use the washroom.

The library's lights were off and the only source of light was the rays from Celestia's sun. The light beams shone through the window and illuminated dust gleamed in the library. Lassie and Spike had passed out on the couch and chair respectively, probably watching a late night movie together. As I looked to the duo I smiled, at least they got along and looked like family together.

A tear came to my eye and I quickly flicked it away. As I made my way to the washroom door, I recalled yesterday afternoon when I had to cut the news to Flim and Flam that they wouldn't be paid due to the fact Daring had screwed me... again. They were... well least to say they were pretty fussy about it, but alas what could I do?

I proped the bathroom door open and proceeded inside, quickly sliding down my boxers just enough to pull my little buddy out and relieve myself. As I stood and waited I groaned to myself.

I owed Rarity, though she didn't know it yet, and I owed Flim and Flam and they really knew it. Oh well, I'd find a way. Finishing up my business, I tidied up and left down to my room to grab some decent apparel.

As I sorted through my stuff I smiled. My mom had done my laundry... I picked up my one shirt, the one that used to be titled 'Don't fuck... with Mr. Clean' but somehow somepony had re-titled it so it now said 'Don't buck... with Mr. Clean'.

I tilted my head back with a smile and a quiet laugh, closing my eyes and taking it in. Oh... this world never ceased to amaze me. I slipped on the shirt, some socks and a pair of faded blue jeans.

As I wandered back upstairs, there was a knock at the door. The hairs on the back of my neck pricked up, but not in a sense of danger... it was something I had never felt before. I slowly crept up to the door and peeked out.

Cameras immediately started flashing, while some ponies immediately stuck microphones at my face. “Mr. Burdick! Howdiditfeeltoascendtothepeakofthemountain?!”

“Mr.Burdick!Overhere!Overhere!Sirwhatwasitlike?!”

Ponies began smothering me with questions, and microphones... I immediately slammed the door shut and locked it, rubbing my eye to try and get the flashes of light out of my vision. God forbid they screwed up my only remaining eye... The words of Mrs. Applenathy's letter returned to my mind. 'You're probably going to become an icon for the press.'

Lassie's head was up and looking at me. “Fans?” she asked and I just groaned.

“Worse... media,” I replied with a shudder. I remembered at this point, people who had become famous for stuff like this... then they got to tour the world and do stuff. The first person to come to mind was Yuri Gagarin... first man in space.

After the Vostok I, he traveled the world as an international celebrity, going to places like Italy, Brazil, Japan, Egypt, even Canada. The man was known world wide... and it kinda made America mad because Russia had ousted them twice in the Space Race at that point. First with Sputnik, now with Yuri.

I bit my lip. Now wondering to myself if I was going to become some idol to the ponies just because I risked my life for something stupid. It was so pointless, going up there. But I remembered the story, the lie that had been set in place.

Lassie sped to my side. “Hey, if any restaurants are offering you free food, it better be complimentary for me too!” Lassie interrupted my thoughts. I just gently patted her on the head.

“Okay... let's get this over with already,” I said, unlocking the door and quickly stepping out, Lassie at my side. The press immediately began flashing pictures and the microphones were stuffed in my face again. “Please just... one at a time,” I commented and one stallion got close.

“Sir, what made you decided to climb?” he asked, another stallion beside him with a notepad.

“A mare was terminally sick and wanted to climb but needed my help... so I helped her,” I replied, mostly grumbling it.

Another pony, a mare this time, jabbed a microphone at my face. “We know that, but why'd you decide to help her?! What was your motivation?” she asked, trying to get the story before any pony else did.

“Because I'm a nice person and like helping peop... ponies,” I stated and several ponies started scribbling things down on their notepads.

Another pony jabbed a microphone in front of the last microphone, further intruding on my personal space. “Sir what was it like up there?”

I blinked. I could say 'Shitty, cold and miserable' but that might ruin the thought of me being nice and helping a dying mare. “The world... was unimaginably beautiful... above the clouds it felt like one could see the entire plant, all connected and together in a peaceful bliss,” I replied and several flashes of cameras erupted and nearly blinded me as more microphones poked at me and the crowd of reporters struggled against one another to get the story.

“Hey, hey! HEY!” I yelled, catching everypony's attention. “Just relax okay.” Another pony jabbed his microphone at me but ended up jabbing me in the eye. “ACK!” I gasped but he didn't take notice and assaulted me with his question.

“Sir how did you do it?! I mean, what equipment did you use? Where did you get it?” At this moment, I smiled... maybe I wouldn't be able to pay Flim and Flam in cash... but perhaps in a different kind of salary.

Lots of companies back on my world prospered just because someone famous used their shit and then the rest is history. “These two brothers, Flim and Flam... they have a small company of sorts... they make various odds and ends, and they make them with exceptional quality. They built my gear specifically to my body and to the specifications needed to endure the mountain's harshness.” Ponies gasped and began scribbling down the information.

One microphone, suspended by magic, jabbed at my face, poking me in the cheek. “Sir, where are these two brothers? Where is their company set up?” the reporter asked.

“Uhm... well, in the desert plains outside Ponyville-” suddenly there was conversation amongst the crowd and within moments half of them sped off, mostly the reporter's cronies. The remaining reporters quickly began plaguing me with questions again.

“Uhm listen, hate to leave you all hanging-” I said aloud then thought to myself 'If only you really were hanging.'

“But I need to eat breakfast so...” I trailed off but one reporter slid in between the door and my body.

“Sir, what do you eat for breakfast?!” he asked, almost like he was interogating me.

Another pony rushed up. “Where do you get your supplies? Or do you go to a restaurant of some kind?”

Another pony rushed up. “Sir, is it true that what you eat for breakfast affects how well you perform in the day?!” he blurted out.

“It will if I don't get anything to eat!” I squished past them, through the door and promptly slammed it shut but not before checking to make sure Lassie was through as well. With a deep inhale, I let out an annoyed huff and locked the door.

Rubbing the bridge of my nose, I looked up to see that both Twilight and Spike were looking to me with wondering gazes. “Fan-fillies...” I sighed. With an upbeat tone, I snapped with both hands then pointed to them. “Who wants breakfast?”

* * *

Hours had past and the media reporters had buggered off for the most part. Some still hid in the bushes nearby, probably trying to get some kinda secret story or something. We had finished breakfast and I was currently jogging on the treadmill in the basement.

I had removed my eye patch and placed a rather thin black cotton bandanna around my head, making sure to droop is low over my left eye to keep it shut and covered. Lassie lay beside the treadmill and simply watched. “You need to get one of those for me,” she said and I smirked while looking down to her.

“All that food finally catching up with you?” I teased but she shook her head.

“Nah, but I bet if my body was a bit more slender, the stallion's around here would probably drool over me when I lift my tail,” she replied and I just snickered. “What, you don't think it'd be sexy?” she asked but I shook my head. “Well why the hell not?” she asked and I just shrugged, still jogging along in the same spot.

“Cause I'm a human. I'm not supposed to think dogs are sexy,” I replied and she just grumbled to herself.

“Well you thought a pony was sexy enough to stick your dick in,” she commented, forcing a blush.

“Well... the stallions around here probably wouldn't look to a dog when there's mares around,” I said and Lassie laid on her side while giving me an inquiring look.

“So what you're saying is that your urges got the better of you and without human pussy to satisfy you, you had to settle for the next best thing?” she teased but I shook my head and answered seriously.

“Nope... back on my world I wasn't interested in sex... not interested in relationships even. Had my truck, my guns and a job. For the foreseeable future that's all I wanted, plus a house to call my own but that would've taken a bit more time.”

She blinked and rolled over several times before sitting on her haunches. “So... you never, not even once thought a girl was cute?” she asked but I shrugged.

“Once or twice when I was younger I had a crush, but it died within a month or so when I convinced myself it wasn't worth it,” I replied and she blinked in shock. "Couldn't let myself be bothered by it."

“Why wouldn't it be worth it?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“Women are aggrivating,” I replied and she went wide eyed.

“All of them?” she asked, astonished but I just shrugged, still jogging along.

“No... probably not all of them. But my mother... my real mother... she was a huge pain in the ass. She'd say to do something, then once you'd do it, she'd freak out because you did it and say I shouldn't have fuckin' done that,” I replied and Lassie giggled.

“Yeah but that's just one female,” she said and I just shrugged.

“There was my adoptive son's mother, she was a bitch... Oh and there was this one time I was watching this TV show... christ what was is called... Pawn Guys or something. Anyway this guy comes in with this antique, vintage double barrel coach gun right,” I began my story and Lassie looked to me, not knowing what that was. “It was like this short double barrel shotgun used by stage-coach riders to defend the carriage way, way, WAYYYY back in the day...” I trailed off and slowed the treadmill so I wouldn't have such difficulty telling the story and keeping pace.

“So he comes in right, shows them this gun, and the thing even had one of the classical bayonets where you pressed a button and this bayonet resting on the top of the barrels flips out for close quarters fighting,” I said and Lassie nodded in appreciation, knowing somewhat what I was talking about and how cool it must've been for me to see.

“So this gun had been passed down from generation to generation and so forth, and he even had the certificate to prove the gun was authentic and all this crap, whatever. Basically the gun was a gemstone right,” I said and Lassie nodded.

“So why was he bringing it to a pawn shop? Why not a museum?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Probably cause the show is fake, anyway the guys at the pawn shop were like 'Oh man, why are you getting ride of this?' and the guy looked to them and was like 'My wife and I are having a baby and she says I can't have any guns',” I began to howl in laughter and nearly lost my pace and Lassie just rose an eyebrow.

“Again... why not then just give it to a realitive if it's a family heirloom?” she asked and I shrugged.

“I dunno but I was watching it with a bunch of friends, I turned to them and was like 'If my wife said that to me I'd be like, you just signed the divorce papers',” I joked and Lassie gave me a quizzical look.

“I thought you yourself said you're giving up your old life of wild, wonky adventures and stuff for Twilight?” she replied and I nodded.

“Doesn't mean I'm gonna go burn my guns or bury them at the bottom of a lake or something,” I said and Lassie rose a brow.

“But what if Twilight asked you too?” she asked and immediately I was stumped, to the point I stopped jogging and was sped off the treadmill, tripping and falling flat on my face. Lassie giggled. “So I take it you'd high-five the floor with your face if she ever asked you?” she joked and I just groaned.

“Well...” I trailed off as I stood up. “It's a good thing it'll probably never come to that,” I told her and she nodded.

“But what if it did?” she asked and I bit my lip.

“I... well... deal with it when the time came,” I said and Lassie smiled.

“Good answer,” she said, pointing to the staircase behind me. I looked behind me to see Twilight sitting on the stairs, like she always did when she peeped on me working out. She had a slight smile on her face.

I just shook my head and chuckled before hopping back on the treadmill. “Some elaborate plan of yours?” I asked but Lassie shook her head.

“No, you brought up the topic of choosing one or the other, and I just decided it'd be fun since you didn't know she was there,” she said with a smile, resting back down on her belly. After another few moments, Spike came down the stairs.

“Uhh... Evan? Are you busy?” he asked and I looked to him.

“Not essentially. Why what's up?” I asked and he came over to the side of the treadmill, somewhat admiring my physique... poor guy, I could tell he wished he had muscle too so that he could impress Rarity.

“Somepony needs to talk to you,” he replied and I just groaned.

“Ugh... tell them I'm done interviews for the day,” I said but Spike was a little taken back by the comment before shaking his head.

“Oh no... it's not those camera ponies. It's Applejack... I guess I should've mentioned that,” he stated and I nodded before turning the treadmill completely off and stepping down.

Using my bandanna to wipe my forehead clean, I slipped my eye patch back on and moseyed upstairs. Applejack was waiting at the door and tipped her hat to greet me. I gave her a nod. “What's shakin?” I asked casually and she looked from side to side.

“Uhm... well... uhh... nothin's really shakin',” she replied, almost feverishly. “Listen uhh... ah was gonna ask earlier but yah all looked like yah had yer hooves full so ah figured ah'd come around later,” she replied though still didn't tell us what she needed.

“So what's going on?” I asked and she bit he lip before stroking her hoof around in circles, probably in train of though.

“Well... uhm... Mac's busy doin' stuff an uhh... ah could use an extra hoof if yah don't mind none... please an' thank-yah,” she said, and in a very courtesy manner.

I gave a nod. “Sure, just let me get some work clothes,” I replied, quickly running downstairs and slipping off my exercising clothes and slipping on my Mr. Clean T-shirt and faded jeans from before, along with my holy cross necklace, super watch and boots.

I hurried upstairs and gave Twilight a peck to the cheek, Lassie a rub on the head and Spike a pat to the shoulder. “Love yah, be back later,” I parted ways with them then proceeded out with AJ.

“So AJ... what's the work?” I asked and she blinked then thought feverishly.

“Uhm... well uhh... harvestin' ain't fer another few months an'... uh... oh, yeah, choppin' fire-wood!” she announced, almost as if she had to think it up...

* * *

The hot sun beat down on me relentlessly. Sweat poured down the back of my neck like there might've been secret leaking faucets hidden in my hair.

At this point I don't think AJ had just thought it up, not anymore. It was hard work and there was a lot of wood to split. I cut the wood and she stacked it. At times however she'd sit and watch me with a most peculiar gaze, a gaze I wasn't quite familiar with, at least not coming from her.

I stopped and looked to her. “Something on yer mind?” I asked and she looked away, to the sky namely.

“Pretty high up,” she stated and I looked to the sky.

“Yeah...” I trailed off as I noticed Rainbow Dash snoozing in a tree nearby. “Pegasus might like heights, but I don't,” I replied and hacked another piece of fire-wood.

“So why'd yah do it?” she asked and I groaned, immediately knowing what she was talking about.

“Because-” but she quickly cut me off.

“An' ah know there weren't no mare, at least not no dyin' one,” she said and I just groaned.

“Listen I-” I tried but AJ cut me short.

“Yah promised Twi, an a promise is a promise,” she said, somewhat aggressively. I just groaned and hacked another piece of wood before turning to her.

“Listen, I told Twilight the truth, all of it. I told her later, after I told you guys... girls, the lie,” I said and Applejack stood closer to me with a glare that seemed to piece my soul.

“Why would yah lie tah yer friends?! An why would yah do it anyway?!” she interrogated. I stepped back and hacked another piece of wood before jamming the axe into the chopping block.

“Okay... listen, and don't interrupt,” I told her and she nodded before motioning to seal her lips shut like a zipper. “So you know how Rarity was robbed?” I asked and she nodded. “That was me,” I was ready to flinch from an outburst but AJ stayed true to her word and kept her mouth shut.

“Okay... so the reason we... okay remember Baltimare and Freeze?” I asked and she nodded. “So I was hanging out with Discord and we saw Baltimare and Freeze on the television so Lassie, Discord, Derreck and I broke into Rarity's to get some clothes... I know we probably could've gotten our own, but Derreck said it could be the last clothes we ever wear so might as well go out with style,” I said and AJ rose her hoof, as if to politely ask if she could interrupt.

“Uhm.. ah know ah agreed not tah interrupt but could ah jus... who's Derreck?” she asked and I just rolled my eyes with a declining wave.

“He's just a friend, it's not important to the story. Anyway so we broke in, got some clothes and saved the day... which is also how I lost my eye. Anyway, so Rarity thinks somepony has robbed her... which we did for good cause, but I don't have any money to pay her back so... I haven't told her,” I said. I was partially expecting AJ to interrupt and say something about morality but she still stayed true to her word and kept quiet.

“Okay... now this is the part where it gets... a little unbelievable. So... you know that story series Dash reads? Daring Do, the fictional character that adventures?” I asked and the farmer mare nodded. “She's... real... really real... and I've met her before but apparently ponies don't know she's real cause she's like... secretive, so whenever I tell somepony I was adventuring with Daring Do they think I'm... well... yeah,” I informed her and she rose an eyebrow but still stayed quiet.

“So... she came to me and offered but I immediately declined but then... well... she offered a hundred thousand bits for me to help her climb... then... well quick story is that I don't like her because she's screwed me over before, so I conned her into giving me a hundred and fifty thousand...” I trailed off and I could see in Applejack's face that she knew as well as I did... that was a lot of dough.

“So I figured... well... yah know... do it secretly, get the money then voila, pay Rarity and everything's couture,” I said and AJ again rose her hoof. “Yeah?” I prompted her to say what she had in mind.

“Listen... why didn't yah just tell Rarity. She really likes yah...” she trailed off and said something about 'A little too much,' then continued. “An' comin from you, she'd have probably just forgiven yah just because,” she said and I groaned but AJ continued. “But ah suppose now that yah got money as well-” I sighed.

“Uhm... sorry to interrupt you but...” I scratched the back of my ear with one of my fingers. “See, that's where the lie comes in. Because Daring needs to stay secretive because... well because whatever, she cranked up this lie that she was a dying mare who's final wish was to ascend to the peak... and... well, you guys got the story. Anyway so she was secretly removed by her buddies and they screwed me again... no money,” I said, not bothering to explain that even though I got paid last time, she still crossed me.

There was a long pause before AJ spoke. “Yah know... I'd say that sounds ridiculous but... yer tellin' the truth... ah can see it in yer eyes,” she said and I dropped to my knees, placing my left hand over my face.

“Listen... I know I fu... I messed up... I messed up real bad and it hurt Twilight... but I'm an idiot okay. It's not an excuse I know but... I don't think very well. I'm stupid and I'm just a... I'm just an accident that shouldn't have been okay. I didn't know what to do and the answer seemed to plop itself right smack in the middle of my lap so I fricken took it without thinking...” AJ leaned her head down and placed her hoof under my chin and tilted my face upwards.

“Sugarcube, ain't care what nopony says. Yah ain't no accident that shouldn't a happened.” I blinked from her stern tone. “An don't think fer a moment ah'm fibbin' yah!” she said as tears started coming to her eyes. “Cause ah remember a brave soul who rushed in tah save muh younger sister, someone who cared more about others than himself... ah still tah this day feel guilty about not goin' in muhself. She was muh sister an-” I cut her short.

“No... if you had've gone in you could've died, and Apple Bloom might've too, and even if she didn't she'd go on living without an older sister” I countered and she smiled.

“Exactly! See... yer thinkin... and yah were thinkin' then too. Maybe not so much with yer head... but down here,” she said, placing a hoof over my chest, my beating heart. “What makes a better pony? One who thinks with their head, er one that thinks with their heart?” I blinked then shrugged but she didn't say anything.

“Well... which is it?” I asked but she didn't answer. “AJ?” I asked but she just smiled.

“See... yah might not be the brightest pony around, but ah know yer always thinkin with yer heart. Sure yah might make a mistake, but as long as yah learn from it...” she trailed off with a smile and gave me a kiss to the cheek. “Thank yah fer saving muh sister... more thank yah than yah'll ever know,” she said and I was still contemplating what she said earlier.

“So... who is a better pony? Head or heart?” I asked and she just smiled, somewhat coyly.

“That sugarcube... is somethin yah'll have tah decide fer yerself,” she told me and I was just lost. But regardless, she still patted me on the shoulder. “Now come on, there's still wood tah chop.” I nodded and stood up, plucking the axe from the chopping block and placing a fresh chunk of wood down.

With a swing of the axe, and a bit to much might, I chopped down hard. The chunk of wood split apart violently but the axe continued to slice right through the chopping block and into my boot.

I felt the impact and gasped. “GAH!” I yelped and Applejack's eyes went wide.

“Yah all right? Oh gosh please tell me it ain't bad! Oh goddess... it's bad ain't it?!” She said frantically. I slowly tossed the axe aside and sighed. There was a gash in the fabric and a little slice mark in the metal... but my toes and foot were fine.

I flopped down to my bum, unlaced my boot and tossed it to her. She inspected it carefully then tapped the metal toe with her hoof. “Steel?” she asked and I nodded.

“Might be a composite, but yeah... steel toes they call 'em,” I stated and she nodded with an impressed look before tossing the boot back to me and we both chuckled.

She let out a sigh. “Bet great grand pappy Akane would've loved some of those,” she said and I quickly put the information together.

“Geeze... I had a great ancestor... Olga I think her name was...” I trailed off and tried to remember the story correctly. “If I remember correctly... she was walking home with some berries she had picked... or groceries... err something, and a train was stopped on the rails so rather than wait or walk all the way around, she decided to just crawl under it... and I can't remember if they said the train jerked or it was put in gear just at that moment or whatever... and it crushed one of her legs. Didn't cut it right off but mutilated it beyond belief... she then proceeded to limp another couple kilometers home, down a dusty road with nearly no neighbors, to her house where her husband then drove her all the way back into town, which was another several dozen kilometers in the direction she had came, and she had her leg amputated.” There was a pause before AJ nodded.

“Wow... she musta been a tough cookie,” she said but I just shrugged.

“Dunno... never met her. Just saw her fake leg in the barn at the family farm when I was a kid,” I stated and she sighed before patting my foot.

“Well it's a good thing yah didn't lose yer foot,” she said and I nodded before standing up and continuing to split wood, despite what had just happened...

* * *

The day was getting late, the sun was setting and the sky was turning that beautiful haze of orange like always. As I walked along I lost track of where I was walking, still directing myself back to the library but taking many detours along the way.

This town... it was really nice... and I'm ashamed for having never really excepted it before now. The ponies were kind, for the most part, and never really deserved the harsh brashness I showed towards them.

“Ha... just look at me now... a softy,” I muttered to myself. Suddenly I bumped into a pony, a little hard no less since I wasn't paying attention. The gray pegasus fell back on her haunches. “Oh... sorr-” I cut myself short and realized it was Derpy. “GAH! Derpy! Oh my goodness, are you okay?” I gasped, quickly helping her up.

She ruffled her feathers then looked to me with an almost astonishingly bright smile as she pulled me into a hug. “Evan! You're okay!"

I blinked. "Well... yeah why wouldn't I be?"

"The newspapers said you were really hurt climbing a really tall mountain... what were you doing anyway?!” she asked, somewhat sternly do to her obvious care for my well-being.

I just shrugged. “Bah... those goons in the media make stuff up all the time. I'm fine. I was just helping out a mare who was... well... I'm sure you read all about her,” I said and she nodded.

“That was really nice of you but... wasn't it really dangerous? Couldn't you have died?” she asked and I nodded.

“I could've died but... well it wasn't really dangerous, for the most part. Just cold was all,” I said, leaving out most of the dangers I had faced. She hugged me again, rather tightly this time and snuggled into my side.

“Okay, just try not to get hurt anymore okay? For me? I wouldn't want you getting hurt,” she pleaded to me, though not in a desperately begging way. I nodded and tussled her mane.

“Of course Derpy... but you gotta be careful too okay? Wouldn't want to lose you either,” I said and she nodded.

“Tail Twist Swear?” she offered and I nodded, bumping flanks with her since I lacked a tail. She turned back around and smiled again before waving. “Okay, gotta fly. I have some deliveries to take care of,” she said and with that was off.

I smiled to myself. I liked her, she reminded myself a lot of me... though maybe not as brash and hard-assed towards others... a more innocent version of me I guess.

I continued along but not even five minutes later, another voice called out. “Oh, Mr. Burdy!” At first I thought it perhaps to be a reporter. I groaned to myself. I think I needed a coffee at this point. As I turned around however, I spotted whom the voice belonged to.

“Eh... Ms. Cheerilee,” I replied cheerfully, walking over to meet her halfway. As we met, I shook her hoof. “How yah doin?” I asked casually and she smiled with a slight 'so-so' look on her face.

“About average. How have you been? I heard-” but I cut her short.

“Yeah... the mountain. It's nothing really, don't worry about it,” I said and she nodded.

“Oh well... I was actually going to ask if you can still make it to the school picnic... I thought maybe because you were hospitalized that you might not...” she trailed off but I shook my head.

“Nah, it was nothing really,” I said modestly, trying to leave out details.

“Oh... I read that you were gravely injured, with broken ribs and pneumonia,” she said and I blushed, turning away and covering my cheek.

“Well... that is to say... nothing I couldn't handle... anyway, yes, I'd love to be a part of the picnic, if you'd have me,” I replied and she nodded.

“Well of course I'd like you to come along. That being said, would you mind bringing your dog? The children love her and seeing as how there isn't much classwork they have to do, she wouldn't really be interrupting anything,” Cheerilee said with a smile. “Oh... and the picnic's tomorrow... that isn't a bother is it?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Nah, of course not. Besides, I'd just make time,” I said with a wink then realized... I only had my one eye. “Oh... sorry... I meant to wink but uhh...” I chuckled pointing to my only eye, and she blushed.

“Thank you. It really means a lot, not just to me but the children as well. So, tomorrow then?” she confirmed and I nodded. She smiled with a wave and with that, she too was off. I smiled but groaned to myself as the day's fatigue caught up with me.

“Guh... I still need that coffee.” I muttered and made a quick detour to Tim Horseton's. I chuckled to myself as I looked at the sign. “Man... what a ripoff,” I laughed to myself as I entered. The place was pretty quiet for the most part and there was just one other customer who was already sitting down with a carton of milk and a bagel.

I stepped up to the ever friendly cashier, Mary. “Howdy,” I greeted with a tip of my non-existent hat. She smiled and returned the gesture though without the tip of an imaginary hat.

“Hey, what can I getcha?” she asked and I clucked my tongue.

“Can I get a coffee, large please?” I asked and she nodded.

“Sure. Cream or sugar?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Black... please,” I replied and she nodded then typed it in. Though despite the simplicity of the order, she still messed it up, charging me for an extra-large coffee, a hot chocolate and a grilled cheese sandwich.

“That'll be... uhm...” she quickly realized her mistake and re-typed the order, still getting it partially wrong as an extra large coffee. “Okay, that'll be two bits,” she replied and I nodded before reaching for my wallet... then realized something dreadfully bad.

“Shit...” I muttered under my breath. As I searched for my wallet but then realized I had left it at home and of course, as always, had declined AJ's offer to pay me. “I uhh... give me a sec, I left my wallet at home,” I said but just as I went to leave she called out to me.

“Wait, it's okay, I'll cover it,” she offered. I turned back to her.

“No, it's okay, I wouldn't make yah do that for me,” I replied but she nodded quickly.

“Well sure, I mean... it's the least I can do really. Considering that I always mess up your order and overcharge you yet you still pay happily... I mean, really... it's not really me paying for it, you just paid in advance... if that's the way you wanna look at it. It's fine really, it's only two bits and Celestia only knows how much you've paid on account of my mistakes,” she replied and I shook my head.

“No really, it's okay. The-” but I was cut off as she checked it through.

“Woops, must've slipped... darn too bad, you get a free coffee,” she said coyly and gave me a smile. “Really, it's the least I can do. Believe me, and if not... too bad,” she said, quickly pouring me a cup of coffee and offering it to me. I smiled with a roll of my eye.

“Thanks Mary,” I thanked her then walked over to a seat. As I sat and sipped my horridly bitter coffee, which I quite liked, I looked out the window to the distant orange horizon. The sun had set but it wasn't quite nighttime yet as there was still sunlight casting it's rays over Equestria.

Mary came over, sitting across from me with a carton of chocolate milk. “Didn't think you'd be the kind of pony... err, person, to like black coffee,” she said, opening the carton and placing a straw in it before taking a sip.

“Usually don't like coffee to begin with... it's just been one of those days,” I said with a sip of my coffee. “Thanks... really, you shouldn't have,” I said but she just smiled brightly, closing her eyes in a cute way.

“No really, it's okay.” She took a sip of her chocolate milk then looked out to the distant horizon. “I heard you climbed Mount Tia... or was it somepony else?” she asked and I nodded.

“Yeah... I uhh... I climbed it. It's nothing really, I was just helping out that mare,” I said and she nodded.

“Wow... you know that mountain was never climbed before right?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Sure it was, just not by ponies. And I'm not a pony so...” I trailed off and she furrowed her brow.

“That's not exactly the way I would've thought about it... even if I was you. And besides, didn't you end up coming back really beat up anyway?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Nah... they fabricated that to make me look more heroic... and probably to discourage others from trying it,” I said and she nodded before taking another sip of her chocolate milk.

“Well... either way, that's really courageous of you... and to do it all for somepony you didn't even know.” I just shrugged.

“I had met her before... that's how she knew I was physically fit, and could take on the harshness of the mountain... and I'm just a nice kind of guy,” I replied and she nodded.

“Yeah, I know. You put up with me messing up your orders all the time but keep coming back... most ponies don't.” She still had a bright smile. We sat there for a while longer before finally both finishing our beverages. I stood up and tossed the empty cardboard cup into the trash receptacle.

“Well... I'll see you later Mary,” I said then gave another tip of my imaginary hat and walked off. Finally, I made it home without further delay, but I suppose if I had met up with another pony I knew it wouldn't have been a bad thing either.

I stepped through the library door but as I did, a realization hit me hard. The lights were off and the curtains were draped down. I cautiously shut the door behind me. “Uhm... hello? Spike? Lassie?... Mom?” I asked, wondering what exactly was going on.

I cautiously stepped further into the home. Through the corner of my eye I caught the flicker of a burning candle. I slowly stepped towards it and as I did, my senses flared like wildfire. I wasn't in imminent danger but...

A body leapt down on my back and a wet sloppy kiss was placed on my cheek. “Gah... mom?” I asked and there was a sigh.

“Mhmm... but maybe for tonight... can you just call me Twilight?” she pleaded and I turned to her. “Please?” she asked and I just nodded in return.

“So... Twilight... where's Lassie and Spike?” I asked but instead I got a luscious and most passionate kiss to the lips.

“They went out for a good long while... that just leaves you and I... all alone,” she said in a very seductive voice. The voice immediately perked my ears up and I gulped, knowing by how she was touching me, what she had in mind... I think.

“Uhm... mo... Twilight...” I stammered in a very nervous voice. “Are... are you sure?” I asked as I felt a magical aura snare my belt and slid it off, flicking it away and into the partially illuminated darkness.

“I-” but that was all I managed as she pulled me down onto the couch, putting my body over hers. “Mo... Twi...” I continued to talk like a blubbering fool. Goddess... my heart was racing and... “Strawberries?” I asked as a whip creamed berry dabbed my nose.

“Mhmm... berries are good for your health, now open up,” she said and I did as asked. She slowly placed the berry in my mouth. I chewed the berry once or twice before swallowing. It was pretty damn tasty. I watched as she reached over and grabbed another berry from a bowl of fruits, then dipped it in whip cream and brought it to her lips. However, rather than just eat it, she very slowly licked the cream from the berry with just the tip of her tongue.

She then proceeded to very slowly trail the berry around her lips before finally sucking the berry into her mouth and swallowing it. My right leg twitched. “How... I mean... you were timid towards this sort of thing... right?” I stammered and she shrugged a little.

“Yes, but I've been reading some books recently... interesting books...” she trailed off and slowly rolled me over, putting herself atop of me. The candle lights flickered and cast flashing shadows over our bodies.

I felt her magic aura tug on the base of my shirt and she promptly pulled it over my head, tossing away the garment. She looked at my body, and placed her hooves under my pectoral muscles, cupping them a little. “I always thought these were kind of cute... don't mind me saying but it almost looks like you have breasts up here,” she said and I giggled.

“Yeah, a lot of the football guys thought it was crazy too... of course a few of them found out they were sensitive, and used to squeeze them,” I said and she rose an eyebrow.

“You let them squeeze your nipples?” she asked but I tossed my head from side to side.

“Not really... they'd more so come up behind me when I was changing, reach around and give me a squeeze... in which I'd usually squeal from the... well, I'm not sure what I was feeling. It didn't hurt it just-” I was cut off as Twilight leaned over and suckled on one of my man nipples. “Ah! I... guh... ngh...” I trailed off, biting my lower lip in... well I wasn't really sure what I was feeling. It felt... strange. There was a tingly feeling, a sensation almost. She began to suckle each nipple, switching from one to the other and at the same time caressing the other with her hoof. I squirmed beneath her and fidgeted. That felt pretty... I don't know if it felt good or just weird.

Twilight looked to me as she plucked her mouth off my nipple with an audible 'plop'. “They really are sensitive. Funny... male stallions don't have nipples and mares don't have breasts in that location... what do female breasts look like on your species?” she asked and I rubbed my head.

“Uhm... kinda like mine but uhh... a bit more round... I think,” I said and she tilted her head to one side.

“What do you mean... you think? Don't you know?” she asked but I shook my head.

“I never... was a virgin, remember?” I replied but she shook her head.

“I know that, but I meant... didn't you read health books?” she asked and I nodded.

“Kinda but I mean... that's what I mean. I think that's what they were like, but you can't expect a book to give a detailed description of what it's going to be like exactly. Everyone's different.” I scratched the back of my head then looked down and saw her tiny pony breasts and gave them an attentive squeeze, getting a moan out of her.

“Hey I... mmm...” she moaned as I rolled our bodies over again.

'Okay... now if I'm doing this correctly than I should... dammit, I really wish I had watched more porn as a kid,' I thought to myself as I grabbed the can of whip cream. Apparently even Twilight knew more than me, reading books and stuff about it.

I sprayed some of the creamy foam on her teats then set the can aside. Very sensually, or as sensually as I could manage, I began licking off the cream, getting rather loud moans from Twilight.

Sooner, rather than later, I had finished all the cream. I looked up to her and saw her with a banana. She bit the tip and slowly peeled it open... which at first made me cringe due to the thought of someone peeling my dick like that...

But then she began rolling her tongue across the tip before sliding the length into her mouth, then slowly slid it back out before lacing her tongue across the tip again in a very sexual demeanor. I took a deep breath, mostly from the anticipation. Oh man... she had me going.

She looked to me, slowly sucking on the banana before pulling it out. “Is that a... oh hold on, what does it say,” she muttered to herself. At that moment I realized her horn was glowing. I looked behind me and saw that she was reading a book she had levitated just behind my head. “Is that a banana in your pants or are you just happy to see me?”

I was a little baffled. “Hey... you can't cheat on a test,” I said, grabbing the book and stuffing it under the couch. She blinked.

“This is a test?” she asked cluelessly and I just sighed.

“No... uhm... I was trying to be sexy,” I replied and she just giggled. Taking her banana, she hosed the top with whip cream the slid it into her mouth, some of the cream dabbing the outside of her lips.

She slowly devoured the banana and looked to me with sultry eyes as she slowly licked her lips. “Think you could make an exception for little ol' me?” she asked and I blinked, barely able to think. With that, my pants were tugged off along with my boxers by her magic.

She crawled down and licked the under side of my erected shaft, getting a twitch from my left leg. She slowly trailed her tongue upwards and to the tip, where she proceeded to perform circles with her slick tongue. “Ugh... wow...” was all I managed. She hummed to herself as she parted her lips and slowly began taking my length.

A thought came to mind and I pulled her around, bringing her rump to my face. In the darkness, barely even illuminated by candle light, it was hard to see her nether region. So I adventured a little and began to drag my tongue along her inner thigh and immediately her rear end tensed up. “Mmm... a little adventurous are we?” I heard her ask and looked to the side, only to see her looking back at me with gleaming eyes. Wow... she sure was pretty, and that's putting it lightly.

I trailed my tongue along until I found myself licking a moist crevice. The taste was bitter and tangy... but in a way sweet. I first began trailing my tongue around the outter edges, almost as if I was saving the best part for last.

It was a little difficult at times as Twilight would bob her head up and down my shaft, her tongue working its magic on the inside and making me moan, forgetting my task at hand. It felt good... really good. As I continued my teasing, a glistening stream of pussy juice leaked out of her. I lapped it up and it too had a strangely appealing bitter sweetness to it.

“Mmm... so sweet,” I whispered to myself before slowly spreading her lips with my fingers. I felt her inner muscles naturally contract in anticipation, but still I protested in teasing her. I began licking up and down, never once pushing my tongue into her waiting tunnel. As I'd reach her fun button, I'd give it a gentle suckle, generally getting a squee out of Twilight.

My member was now being sucked to the deepest depths of her mouth, and from time to time even beyond that. It felt pretty good, but not quite like the real thing. Very slowly, I slid my tongue into her and she pulled her head up off my cock for a loud moan. My tongue intruded her most private depth and began massaging her insides as far as it could go.

“Mmm... you sure you've never done this before?” she asked through a whinny moan.

I tried to give a reply but it was muffled by her love tunnel which was partially suffocating me... but I liked it. Juices sloshed against my nose and the aroma filled my nostrils. It was intoxicating. I couldn't get enough and pushed my tongue further into her depths, pressing my face into her flanks. Twilight continued to moan, now neglecting my shaft and rocking her hips into my face.

Rather quickly, her moans became louder and louder to the point where I figured we'd alert the neighbors to our private business. “Ooh... keep going...” she whined while pumping her hips against me. “Don... Don't st-t-top!” she squeaked then suddenly pressed her rump firmly against my face and shuttered, stiffening in place and doing nothing but shaking against my body while letting out one prolonged and orgasmic scream. A viscous fluid seeped from her pussy and I was enticed to try it, whether it be the mood or otherwise, I licked it up.

It had a somewhat different taste than the usual fluids but it was still strangely pleasant and left me wanting more. I licked up what I could and slowly she came down from her orgasmic high and sat herself on my lap, resting her head against my chest.

“Oh my goddess... that was wonderful,” she whispered in a heavenly tone. I nodded and she looked up to me before getting off me, turning herself around and presenting her rump to me once again, her ever twitching entry just waiting for me to take. “Maybe I can return the favor?” she opted and it was an offer I couldn't refuse.

I sat up and crawled up over her, aligning myself with her wet snatch. The immediate contact was almost too much to bear. We both gasped, both from the intimate contact, and the anticipation of what was to come.

I slowly slid myself into her, her insides immediately gripping me in its velvety hold, massaging me to the point I nearly blew my load right then and there. I finally reached my full length, burying myself inside of her and leaving myself enveloped for a short time. Despite being stationary, it felt as if just being inside of her was bringing me closer to my climax.

With that, I began rocking my hips, driving myself deep with each thrust. There was a slucking sound that emitted itself as I rutted her, namely from the amount of fluid leaking from her wet entrance that was now stuffed with my member.

I looked down and saw myself driving in and out of her with a rather slow pace. The image stuck into my mind and drove me even closer to my orgasm. “Oh... oh mo... Twilight... I... you feel so good,” I moaned and she nodded happily, rocking her hips against me as I continued humping her.

“Mmm... and you feel really good inside me,” she said back. I continued railing her, looking down every so often to see the magic happening, and all the while trying my hardest to keep the building pressure in my groin under control. I just wanted this to never end.

The flickering candles still cast their fiery light over us, making the moment that much more intense... that much more passionate... and forever memorable. Her insides continued to milk me, slowly clasping down and squeezing me with a gentle force.

As I neared my finish, I stopped and Twilight looked to me with a wondering gaze but before even a syllable was spoken, I turned her over and pressed my chest into hers as I penetrated her once more, but this time I also connected our lips.

I lowered one of my hands to her flanks and began to rub attentively, mostly around her cutie mark. She hummed more audibly as our lips stayed connected and our tongues danced together.

The feeling of my bare chest rubbing against her soft fur further amplified the sensational feeling of it all. She pulled her head back for a deep breath, which ended up turning into a moan. In an instant, I found my lower region assaulted by her as she began to thrust her hips into me erratically and wildly. I tried to match the motion but couldn't. Her moans echoed in the home, louder than anything else.

I felt her insides start to spasm and clench tightly around my length as I continued to drive her. The sudden restriction began to drive me over the edge and my cock began to feel tingly and numb. I gasped, sputters of breath leaving my body as I began to cum.

My first load left me like a fighter jet taking off, plastering her insides. I tried to pull back for another thrust but only ended up getting halfway through the motion as yet another load left my cock, splattering even more of her insides.

My body jerked as I moaned and we quickly connected our lips, my entire body twitching as we body endured our orgasms, connected together in a sacred bond.

After a moment we came down from our orgasmic highs and ended up staring into one another's eyes... or in her case, just my one eye. “I love you,” I whispered and she nodded.

“I love you too... oh wow... you really ejaculated inside of me, I can feel your sperm inside of my vagina,” she said... rather scientifically. I gave her a pale look. "What?! I don't have my book to read what's sexy to say. All I know is what I learned from health books," she said defensively and I and slid myself out of her.

I stroked her cheek. "It's okay... I'm not good at this either. We'll learn together." I looked down and through the somewhat decent illumination, I saw a stream of my cum leaking out of her. She looked down then back up to me before speaking.

“I can feel it leaking out of me,” she whispered and she pulled me down and began snuggling me.

Her horn began to glow and there was a click somewhere. “What did you just do?” I asked and she smiled while her eyes were still closed.

“I'm kind of tired and don't really feel like cleaning up... so I locked the door so Spike doesn't walk in and see us like this... he's still too young,” she whispered and I nodded as I rested my head beside hers and held her close. I reached over and grabbed some raspberries, taking a handful of them and gobbling them up.

“Mmm... almost as good as you,” I teased and she giggled before nestling her head into my chest. With another glow of her horn, the candles were all put out and we both quickly fell asleep in each other's hold...

* * *

I woke up to the sight of a concrete roof. I was sitting in an office chair in... “Wait... what?” I gasped as I immediately stood up. I was in a small office... it was so familiar. “Wait... how am I...”

I knew this place... it was the parlor office at work... My boss's barn. I stepped out of the small office and into a breezeway. Looking to my left I saw the inside of the barn, filled with lactating cattle.

I stumbled straight forwards and out a door and onto a gravel path. I looked around. Cadence was parked on the gang-way leading up to the hay loft, where she always was parked. Across the yard was the tractor shed and beside that was the shop. Then there was the sports pad and my boss's house.

Beside the barn however, was a fenced in pasture field where several non-lactating cows, or dry cows as we called them, roamed freely.

My world began to spin in circles. Where was I... no, I knew where I was... how did I get here? A sudden, dark and almost cynical thought entered my mind. “Was it... all a dream?” I asked regretfully. I didn't even want to think it but... could it be?

“NO! NO IT CAN'T BE A FUCKIN' DREAM!” I roared out. There was no way... no fucking way. I couldn't lose everything, not again. I had already lost it and by goddess I wouldn't accept that it was just a dream. It was too real. Too personal.

I slapped myself... hard, leaving a red mark on my cheek. I checked my eye, my bad one... it was fine just like it had been before I went to Equestria. “No... no this can't fucking be happening... FUCK!” I screamed, tears coming to my eyes.

I fell to my knees and drove my fist into the ground. “Fuck... no... no-no-no-no... NO!” I yelled.

I couldn't believe this... after everything... accepting Equestria... accepting that I'd never come home... falling in love... all just a fucking dream. I should've known it was too good to be true... “WHY THE FUCK COULDN'T I HAVE WOKEN UP EARLIER WHEN I WANTed TO FUCKING COME HOME?!” I roared at the sky.

“Murrah!” came an audibly recognizable moo... one I could never forget. One so deeply driven into my mind I'd never forget her. I looked up and saw a red Holstein cow, one who's head might've been bigger than a moose's.

I starred a good long while while she starred back at me, head tilted slightly and her big goofy look bringing a smile to my face in this sad time. I remembered her... Twizzler, the first cow I ever really liked. Before that, to me cows were just big dumb animals that mooed when they were hungry, or bitched when they wanted something, never once taking initiative to do anything.

But she changed my views on that. About the second week into working at the farm I went to feed the heifers, and at the time, she too was a heifer... just a mere few hundred pounds and not much taller than my waist level.

As I went to feed them with the bucket of corn grain however, despite her small size at the time, she herded me into a corner, nestled her head against me and gently began to eat out of the bucket while she nestled her head against me. She was so... I didn't have a word for it. At that moment was when I realized, every cow was unique. It had it's own set of feelings. What it liked, how it liked it... special spots it liked to get scratched where others didn't like to be scratched. How they reacted when they were happy or sad. Other cows that they got along with and didn't get along with... they were like big people that couldn't talk to humans.

I hopped over the fence and gave Twizzler an attentive rub to the cheek with my right hand while scratching her crown with my left, just the way she liked it. She rubbed her massive head into my chest, her head being about the size of my torso.

I remembered when she was a bit older. Cows, despite their feelings, still have... or at least had, a sense of hierarchy. There was alpha females, since we didn't keep bulls on the farm. The alpha female was to always get the male regardless.

As she grew older, Twizzler was on the lower spectrum of the hierarchy despite her now large size. She was timid and shy and I only ever saw her socialize with Aster, another one of my favorite heifers despite the fact she'd always try to hump me.

One day as I was petting Twizzler when the alpha female of the pack saw and since I was technically a male, and was showing affection to a lower female... it wouldn't be that way. As I rubbed Twizzler in the special way she always liked, the alpha female charged Twizzy from the side and crashed her in the ribs while driving her entire body into the hard barn wall.

After the devastating blow, the alpha female pranced towards me, acting like she had accomplished some great feat. Almost like she was saying “See that? I'm better than her, so you should pay attention to me!”

My fury boiled over and I clenched my fist, before swinging back and driving a punch forwards with all my might. My knuckles clashed hard against her forehead with a driving force that if done again would break my knuckles. I grunted in pain while the alpha staggered back, dazed and disoriented.

“Don't touch my Twizzy, you bitch!” I yelled and cocked back for another swing. Getting the message, the alpha female scurried off, bellowing loudly, probably either in anger or in disbelief.

I shook my hand, the mediocre pain catching up with me. “Ow... shit,” I whispered to myself then looked to Twiz. “Hey Twizzy, come-ere,” I offered and waved her over as I slowly approached her but she backed up, either fearing to be hit agian by an alpha, or scared of me.

“I won't hurt you... and if she ever hurts you again I'll break her ribs,” I whispered gently and began to rub her crown.

The memories faded from my mind for the time being as I patted Twizzler in the present time. Since then she had really became a pet. Whenever I'd call her name, her head would shoot up while her ears perked and she'd come racing over to me. “You're a good girl Twizzy,” I whispered in her large ear that was over half the size of my face.

Before I could say much else however, she suddenly headbutted me, and rather hard. “Ahh... Twiz,” I gasped. She sometimes did this, but only when she wanted to play. As a heifer it was fun, as she grew older and heavier however, it became detrimental to my health. She was huge, strong and had enough force to bust my nose... which she did once before by accident while also giving me a puffy eye when she was in heat.

However, despite my declining reaction to play, she hit me harder. “Twiz... not now,” I said sternly but this time she scrapped her hoof in the dirt and really swung her head into me, tossing my body back.

“Ack... Twiz!” I yelled, rather angrily. However, despite my tone, she instead charged me, a weird look in her eyes. She plowed through me, trampling my body underneath her. I groaned as I rolled over and staggered to my feet.

“Okay Twiz... fuck off!” I yelled, getting angry and clenching my fist. However, I realized quickly she had no intention to play. She huffed wildly and really chewed up the dirt with her hoof as she scrapped it along the ground. “Tw... Twiz?” I asked in shock then realized something. “SCOTT! GRAB A FUCKING GUN!” I yelled at the top of my vocal capacity, praying that he'd at least be home and could hear me, rather than be out gallivanting like he usually was.

Twizzler, my favourite cow of all time, charged at me once again and battered my body with her head, tossing me into the 110V electric fence. I had been zipped by it before but... this time it felt worse than ever.

My vision blurred as white stains of light burned my vision. I swear I could hear the snapping of electricity as blue sparks zapped my body. I fell forwards and groaned. “Ugh... ugh fuck... FUCK!” I swore painfully as I stood up, rubbing my eyes and opening them.

However as I did, my eyes went wide. The sky was a dark red with vicious lightning clouds in the backgroud. The ground was black and sooty. The trees were all burning along with the fields of pasture, the only place not burning being the spot where both Twiz and I stood.

At some point, she had impossibly grown a set of horns... big ones... like ones seen on Texas Longhorns. Her eyes burned with a fiery gaze of hellish intent. Suddenly her bottom jaw split in two and she opened her mouth, revealing both a set of razor sharp teeth on her top and bottom jaws, along with a long slimy green tongue.

“Oh shit... holy fuck!” I yelled in fear. I stepped back but tripped on my own footing and fell to my back, but still kept crawling backwards as Twizzler slowly began stepping towards me, fire burning from her eyes, her tongue slimming out with drool seeping from her gums and past her teeth.

I found myself immobilized in fear as she approached me. Why the fuck couldn't I move...

Without warning, there was a deafening roar, one that couldn't be matched. The demon cow looked to the origin but no sooner had she than a powerful fist punched her right smack in the jaw, swinging her head in the other direction while a powerful shock wave of force blasted outwards from the impact. A powerful feeling flowed from my saviour... but immediately I knew who it was.

With another menacing roar, Derreck pounded a second punch into the cow's face, one of equal force. The cow staggered back and Derreck crouched low while letting out a yell of anger. Red static electricity crackled around his body as his muscles bulged, veins protruding themselves from under his skin. He cocked back and the electricity around his arm intensified, becoming thicker and more prominent.

With a powerful roar, he slammed his fist forwards, the electricity forming like a spearhead around his hand as he drove a punch into the cow's forehead and knocked her down to her side. Stepping over the cows neck, he reached down and grabbed both bottom jaws with his left hand and the top jaw with his right.

Grabbing the jaws tightly, which resulted in the devilish teeth piercing right through his hands, he began to yell as he pulled the jaws apart, the cow now squirming beneath him. “FUCK YOU... THIS IS WHY YOU ALWAYS TRY TO FIGHT THOSE WHO CAN'T FIGHT BACK! BECAUSE WHEN YOU FIGHT SOMEONE LIKE ME... YOU DIE!” Derreck roared in a terrifying voice.

After just a moment's time, he snapped the jaws apart and the cow flopped down, dead. He turned to me and reached out, his hands' wounds sealing shut. “Come on,” he motioned with his hand to let him help me up. I took his offer and stood up. He took a few steps back then turned around. “I gotta piss,” he said and I blinked and for whatever reason, I just spoke without thinking.

“But what if there's more of them around?” I asked timidly and he turned his back to me but looked over his shoulder, his eyes having a burning fury in them. He clenched his fists and the red electric static returned around him along with a now deep red, fiery aura.

“Then I will burn their bodies to ash... and crush their bones into dust!” He snarled in a dark tone. As he said that my world began to zone out and I felt myself begin to faint...

* * *

I awoke with a gasp, quickly looking around but was met with the sight of darkness. However, my other senses quickly came to my aid and I was extremely relieved to find a soft fury embodiment next to me... along with her beautiful aroma.

I flopped back down and snuggled into her, knowing full well this was not a dream, and being eternally grateful that it was real. “I couldn't leave... not anymore. I don't wanna go back,” I whispered to her, though she probably couldn't hear me because she was sleeping. “I love you...”

Author's Note

So I actually had a dream quite like the one in the story which got me wondering... when someone saves you like that but says something that dark... are they a saviour or something else? Dunno, has plagued my thoughts since, but still... when you're nearly chomped by a demon cow in a dream that feels too real to be fake but someone saves you then says that... you really do feel safe.

Anyway, cheers ladies and gents.

Chapter 39

'Kids aren't too bad...'

I awoke somewhat subtlety... there was a rapping at the door, followed by the sound of claws scratching, whining, and then more rapping...

I groaned, rubbing my eyes. Suddenly Twilight shot straight up. “OH DEAR! What time is it?!” she gasped. I rooted around and found my watch.

“Uhm... about...” I looked. “Seven-thirty?” I asked, wondering why she was-

“HEY, LET ME IN YOU TWO!” Screamed the all too familiar voice of my canine friend. “I SAID, LET-ME-IN!” She screamed. Twilight scurried around, quickly cleaning up the mess we had made last night.

I quickly slipped on my old clothes and as I did, I noticed there was a rather large stain on the couch cushion where we had spent the night. “Shit...” I muttered, quickly flipping the cushion upside down. Unfortunately there was an older stain there too. “Ergh... Lassie!” I hissed, knowing full well that the stain had probably come from her.

There was more banging at the door and Twilight squeaked. “Shoot... it's leaking everywhere.” I was going to ask but a creamy white slime running down the backside of her leg as she rushed to the washroom answered my question.

Lassie cried out as she whimpered at the door, scratching away. “Aww come on guys. Spike's not even with me. It's not like I don't know what you're doing in there... come on, let me in, I have stuff to do today!” she cried.

With that I opened the door and she rushed in, immediately glaring at me. “Why didn't you tell me Cheerilee was having a school picnic and had invited us?” She had this look... it was priceless and made me want to chuckle but alas, I stayed serious.

“Well... she actually invited me last night, and when I got home you had already left,” I replied honestly. She scowled at me.

“That's no excuse... well... why the hell'd you lock the door and leave me out all night?! It was cold out! What kind of owner are you?!” she scolded me. I just rolled my eyes.

“Okay... you were out late and we... well... didn't want anypony walking in on us the way we were on the couch,” I informed her. She sat on her haunches then crossed her font legs in an irritated way.

“I had... to sleep in a hay mow at Applejack's... because dog's aren't allowed on the furniture... a HAY MOW!” She yelled at me and I merely snickered.

“Then... why didn't you just sleep at Fluttershy's? She let's animals in the house and on the furniture,” I asked and Lassie gave me a glare.

“Because that mare is screwy in the head.” Lassie shuddered.

“H... How?” I asked uneasily, wondering if I really wanted to know the answer.

“She... she tried to... to sing me a lullaby after she tucked me into bed... what kind of whacko does that? I'm not some little puppy, man. How would you feel if she tucked you in like an infant then began to sing you a lullaby?” she asked and I thought to myself. Fluttershy had a very timid and gingerly voice that would kind of sound soothing really.

“Pretty relaxed... so you ditched the bed and blanket for a hay mow just cause it was weird her singing to you?” I asked and Lassie nodded, looking away with an irritated face.

“Anyway... Cheerilee said she's having a picnic and had invited us... TODAY!” She announced like it was a bad thing.

“Okay... so?” I asked, wondering what was so bad.

“I barely have anytime to prepare!” she announced, again, in an unnecessarily loud voice.

“Well... okay we could bring some... apples or something?” I offered but she shook her head then shook me.

“I mean for the act!” she said and I blinked, unsure of what she meant. “Dude... okay Trixie taught me some things and I want to try them out on an audience so I told the kids last time I was there that I'd do some magic tricks for them next time I was in. SO COME ON, WE GOTTA GET READY!” She began pushing me and huddling me down the stairs.

Rather quickly she began trying to pull off my pants. “HEY!” I gasped and she gave me a dumbfounded look.

“Well!... Hurry up, we don't have all day!” She hurried me. Rather irritably, I slide off my pants but to my discomfort, noticed a stain of dampness in my underwear. Lassie quickly scurried over and sniffed it. “Woah... you guys went at it like a pair of horn-dogs,” she giggled and I just looked away with a sour expression on my face.

I grabbed a fresh pair of boxers and went to change but noticed Lassie was watching me. I waited a moment for her to get the message but instead she kept looking at me. “Well... what are you waiting for?” she asked and I motioned for her to turn around. “Oh for the love of... urgh!” She put her paw over her eyes.

As I began to change she peeked her paws open. “ACK! HEY!” I gasped and she took her paw away then rolled her eyes.

“Relax. It's not like I haven't seen you naked before,” she replied then began to pull out some funky magic gear. I quickly slid on my new boxers but as I went to get some jeans, Lassie stopped me. “Ah-ah-ahhh! You need these,” she said and handed me what looked like some funky blue gypsy pants that were overly wide at the bottom and made of silky fabric.

“Uhm...” I trailed off, looking blankly at the pants.

“I got Rarity to make them,” she said and my heart sank a bit.

“Did you... tell her about?” I asked hesitantly but Lassie shook her head.

“Nah dude... that's you're problem. I wasn't the one who blew down her door with a shotgun,” she mentioned and I let out a relieved exhale. “And don't worry, I paid for these. They were cheap. Oh, and you need this too,” she gave me a dark blue cape dress thingy and little pointy hat. As I slipped everything on I noticed the arms were a little long on the cape dress. I had to say... for something so silky looking, it was a tad bit on the heavy side.

“Mmm... ugh... if only they were white,” I muttered and Lassie looked to me.

“Huh... what's that?” she asked but I waved it off.

“Nothing... racial comment about my world,” I replied. I looked at my suit and shuddered. If it had a mask with only two eyeholes and the hat was a little taller I wouldn't be wearing it. Memories of South Park episode: Pinkeyes, came to mind. Namely when Cartman dressed up as Hitler, then was later given a ghost costume which subsequently looked like a KKK uniform.

I smiled and let out a quiet chuckle to which Lassie looked to me. “What's so funny?” she asked but again I just waved it off.

“You wouldn't understand even if I told you,” I said, still smiling. Lassie then put on my cowboy hat and duster along with some fancy leather looking pants. “Hey... that's my duster and hat!” I said aloud and she nodded.

“I know. But I need it for the act. I'd have to explain everything to you if you were wearing this,” she informed me and I simply nodded.

“Ohh... okay. Where's Spike anyway? I heard he went with you,” I asked and Lassie just groaned.

“He could handle Fluttershy's singing,” she replied and I just snickered. “What?!” she asked defensively.

“Just ironic. Don't know how good you have it... till you're sleeping on a hay mow,” I joked. She frowned and gave me a funny look and mouthed the words out I had just said. I rubbed her heard and pulled her tight to my leg. “Aww Lassie, it's why ah love yah.” She rubbed into my leg briefly before pulling away.

“Okay, now let's skidattle so we're not late for school!” And I looked at my watch.

“School doesn't start for another... hour and a bit,” I replied and she shot me a stare.

“We'll go early... and if you're good I'll get you a treat at Tim Horseton's,” she mentioned and my ear perked up at the sound of it, then I got to thinking.

“Hey wait a minute... you're the pet, I decide if I get it or not!” I said and she just gave me an 'Oh really?' look. “What?” I asked and she raised her eyebrows higher. “You are the pet. You don't decide whether or not I get Tim Horseton's.” She just shrugged, rolled her eyes and slipped on some more things, namely a saddle bag to which the contents I was unsure.

“Okay, let's go!” Lassie began pulling me along. As we reached the upstairs, my mother looked to me with an estranged look.

“I uhm... uhh... am part of a magic act I just found out about.” I leaned over and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “I'll be back later, oky dokey?” I gave her a wink as Lassie continued to drag me along.

We reached Cadence and Lassie went to hop in the driver seat. “Ah-ah-ahh... no way, hosé.” Lassie looked to me and I pointed to the passenger seat. “This is Cadence. She is my truck. That means I am the driver,” I told her and she got huffy as she grumpily paced over to passenger side door and got in.

I played with the naughty key and dangled it around inside the cubby hole. “Feeling ansty sweetie?” I asked and played around with it until it beeped. Finally starting the truck, Lassie muttered.

“You drive like an old stallion,” she quipped and I merely chuckled.

“I drive 'er like a Cadillac,” I replied and Lassie looked at me with a curious stare.

“What's a Cadillac?” she asked but I just shook my head. “You're gonna have to take me to your world one day so I can understand all these human terms you use.” I nodded and slipped the truck into drive before puttering towards Tim Horseton's.

I reached under the center console for my wallet but couldn't seem to find it. “Where did I...” I trailed off as I saw Lassie dangling my wallet. “Hey, where'd you get that?” I asked and she smiled.

“Twilight gave it to me last night so you two could spend a romantic and intimate night together... told you I decided whether or not you got Tim Horseton's,” she giggled and I tried to grab it but she pulled it away and opened it.

“Really... why did you buy a purse with leopard print inside?” she asked, laughing as she flipped through it.

“It's not nice to search through somepony's wallet!” I snapped but she just laughed and kept going through it.

“But seriously. This is a mare's purse,” she laughed and I grabbed it from her paws.

“It's not a purse. It's a wallet cause I, a man, owns it... and besides... I went to Africa, killed a snake to make the leather, and then killed a leopard to get the print,” I joked and she blinked.

“Where's Africa?” she asked and I just sighed.

“The place with... deserts and... jungles and... zebras?” I asked unsurely and she looked at me.

“You mean Zebrafica?” she asked and I just facepalmed.

“Yup... yeah... yeah, Zebrafica... yup...” I just trailed off. Ridiculous name but okay. I pulled up to the Tim Horseton's. “Too bad this place didn't have a pick-up window,” I mentioned, not using the term 'drive-thru' since Lassie wouldn't know what that was either.

I left Cadence running as we both hopped out and walked into Tim Horseton's. As usual, the ever friendly employee, Mary, was operating the cashier. We both walked up and Lassie hopped to her hindlegs, putting her front paws on the counter. “Hey sweet cheeks,” Lassie began in a very suave voice, making Mary blush a little.

Lassie thought for a moment before ordering. “I'll get an iced cappuccino with whipped cream and... a cinnamon roll.” Mary nodded and typed it in before looking to me.

“Can I get some chocolate milk and a jelly powder doughnut please,” I ordered and Lassie spoke up.

“Better make it a couple dozen doughnuts,” she mentioned and I looked to her. “For the picnic, duh!” I slapped myself in the forehead like the universe's mysteries had been solved. I nodded to Mary and she typed it in. I paid for the rather large tab and realized I had dwindling amounts of bits left. I'd have to count later but it looked like maybe eighty bits... a hundred at tops.
Amazingly, despite the large order, she got it right... minus the fact she dinged me for a hot chocolate as well. I gave her a nod, thanked her and returned to the truck, stacks of doughnut boxes in my arms. Lassie looked to me. “Oh-ho man... OH-HO man! We could probably do ANYTHING we want and when the police finally busted us, we'd have the biggest get out of jail free card ever... you could probably feed an entire police station with those,” she joked and I looked to her with a puzzling expression as I loaded the doughnuts in the back seat.

“Does Ponyville even have a police department?” I asked and she rubbed her chin before hopping into the passenger seat.

“Dunno. Probably not man. They have a fricken magical princess living in the library and the ex-god of choas. They're fine,” she mentioned and I merely rubbed my chin also as I shut the door behind me and began driving towards the school.

“Yeah but it would've come in handy with Tristan and everything,” I brought up an old topic and Lassie just shrugged with a 'dunno' look.

“Well... considering he bested Twilight and you... I don't think a police officer would've done much,” she commented and I nodded in agreement.

We pulled up to the school and I checked my watch. “Still got like forty-five minutes to kill,” I said, putting my vehicle into park and shutting her off before taking a sip of my chocolate milk. It was honey flavoured.

Lassie sucked her beverage from a straw and sat with the cinnamon roll in the other paw. I sat in a similar fashion and looked out to the town, almost as if I were some kinda... “Pfft... tee-hee,” I snickered and Lassie looked to me, wondering what was so funny.

“What's...” she looked around to see what I was laughing at. “Did somepony slip on a banana peel?” she asked but I shook my head.

“I feel kinda like a cop right now. Just need a steaming coffee instead,” I joked and she just rolled her eyes.

“You ever wonder why the call them cops? Like where the term came from?” she asked. I shook my head as I reached over into the glove box and pulled out a specific CD.

“Nope, but uhh...” I trailed off as I set the CD into the player. In moments, an unmistakable tune began to play and I sang along, but mostly just hummed the tune since I couldn't understand what they were saying half the time.

“Huh!
Bad boys!
Whatcha want,
Whatcha want,
Whatcha gonna do...
When Sheriff John Brown come for you!”

Lassie sat for a moment, blinked, set her cappuccino on the dash then dipped her face into her free paw. “You're helpless,” she muttered. We sat for the duration of the time it took for the class to show up and merely sat like a pair of stereotypical police officers.

Finally, after everypony had arrived, or rather until we had figured everypony was here, the two of us stepped out of the truck. We left the doughnuts in the truck, figuring we'd get them on our way out.

As I looked to myself, I realized how utterly ridiculous I looked. Lassie on the other hand looked pretty cool, cowboy duster and all...

We stepped into the classroom and the eyes fell upon us. At first they were thrilled to see my canine companion and many waved to her, but as they saw me, most of them giggled. “Ugh... I can't believe I agreed to this,” I muttered. No sooner had I said that, Lassie jabbed me in the side, somehow managing to stand perfect posture on her hindlegs.

“Sssh,” she ordered and I just nodded. I looked to Cheerilee and gave a half-witted smiled.

“Mornin',” I greeted and she smiled in return.

“Okay, settle down everypony,” Cheerilee began but one of the younger colts blurted out.

“Lassie, are you really going to do magic tricks today?!” he asked in excitement to which she nodded in return. With that the class went beserk... why exactly were they so thrilled? Lassie must've noticed my stare.

“They really like me. I'm like their Mosiah,” she said and I nodded. Cheerilee quickly hushed the class and tuffed her man to one side.

“Yes well... indeed. I was meaning to say, as you all know today is the class picnic, meaning we are all spending the day outside-” she was suddenly, and most abruptly, cut off by another colt.

“NO SCHOOL WORK!” He cheered and the rest of the class cheered with him. Cheerilee just smiled as she waited it out but instead, Lassie spoke up.

“Kids, kids... children, listen to the teacher,” she said in a very tutorial-like voice. I was shocked really. The class went quiet and they all sat in due attention. My dog looked to Cheerilee and they nodded to one another.

“Yes, well... as I was saying. As you all know today is the school picnic. We have no school work today and you all get to spend the day outside...” she continued on and I smiled to myself. This was like the playday at the end of the year when I was in kindergarten. Just hang around outside like it was recess all day.

“And, at lunch time, Lassie will perform her magic show like she said she would,” Cheerilee informed the class, to which they all squealed in excitement... except that snooty one, Tiara, and her little silver friend... Spoony, I'll call her.

Without further ado, Cheerilee led the kids out to the playground and field where Lassie ended up playing with them, even Tiara and Spoony. She'd play fetch, hid and seek, even tag... with all the kids, not just one grounp.

I looked in amazement and Cheerilee caught my stare. “You trained her well,” she said but I just shook my head, somewhat in a bit of shame.

“No... no really I didn't. She trained herself,” I replied and Cheerilee giggled a little.

“I take it she made you wear those?” she asked, pointing to the robes, and I nodded. “I guessed as much... it looks a little funny on you, no offense.” She laughed lightly, almost timidly, and we both sat and watched.

One of the younger colts, Pip, or Pippy... he looked kinda like a cow and I forgot his name. To any means, he ended up straddling on the back of Lassie while she trotted around, almost like she was a horse, and he was a rider. She even gave him my hat to put on... it looked cute, especially when the hat tipped over his face because it was too large.

“They have their moments,” Cheerilee mentioned and I nodded.

“Yeah... kids are alright,” I said and she nodded.

“I know you're young... but do you mind me asking if you ever thought of having children?” she asked and I shrugged.

“I had a kid,” I replied and she went wide eyed.

“Really?” she asked and I nodded. “Well... I suppose they were young before all this happened?” she asked but I shook my head.

“He was... wasn't my child by birth or anything. Divorce between the parents left him with the mother and the mom was a bit koo-koo so legal rights or whatever put me as his legal guardian so he's my guardianized child by law of... whatever, just easy to say he was my kid.” I told her and she nodded, still listening. “I didn't watch him twenty-four-seven or anything... just a week or two at a time while his mother... or as he called her, his birth giver, calmed down.”

“That's too bad... divorce's usually hurt more ponies than they intend to,” she said in an understanding voice but I just shrugged.

“Number one reason for divorce... marriage,” I joked but she just gave a frowny face. “Sorry... it's a guy joke,” I laughed. She let out and exhale. My conscious spoke up. 'Happy wife, happy life. But if you take out one of those things, you'll just be left with happy life.'

“Did you ever really and truthfully ever consider a child?” she asked. I shook my head and she asked me another question. “Why not? If you don't mind me asking,” she asked but I didn't really have a full answer.

“Ah dunno... was planning on leaving to the military straight after high-school... got caught up on a farm and... just never really took interest in women,” I said then quickly realized she might not know what women were. “Women are the female of my species,” I stated and she just nodded.

“I see... so you... uhm... are you?...” she asked hesitantly. I ushered her to ask, not knowing what she was wondering. “Are you... gay?” she asked and I nearly jumped back.

“Woah, no! I don't roll that way!” I gasped and she too was startled back, but by my sudden outburst.

“Oh sorry, I didn't mean to offend you,” she apologized. “I just thought because-” but I cut her short.

“No-no, it's okay. I'm not offended. I don't really have anything against gays either it's just... yeah no. I don't roll like that...” I trailed off as I remembered jerking off with Big Mac. A shudder went down my spine.

“I really didn't know is all. I just... well you said you had no interest in females so...” she trailed off and I let out an exhale.

“I meant what I meant, I just didn't mean that I had an interest in males instead. I just... never showed interests in relationships was all. So in turn... I never really thought about... that, and subsequently, having children with someone... somepony, never crossed my mind” I mentioned and she nodded.

We sat together for a while longer and I turned to her. “I might've asked but my memory isn't too good... did you ever think of having children?” I asked. She nodded then sighed. “Never happened I take it?” She shook her head.

“I would've loved to but... well, I'm getting on in my years and most stallions are taken and others... well...” she trailed off and I could see a small tear form in the corner of her eye.

“I'm sorry... I uhh... if it's any condolence, you'll find him... a good stallion. You deserve that much. And I think you'll make a good mom,” I told her and she just smiled.

“Working with the students so much I... I don't know where I'd get the time,” she said, namely to herself but partially to me. I put my arm around her and pulled her tight as we watched the kids.

We sat and chatted for a moment before one of the older fillies rushed up. “Ms. Cheerilee, Ms. Cheerilee!” She exclaimed and we both looked to her with stunned expressions. “It's lunch time!” I looked to my watch. It was actually a few minutes before noon, but I remember being a kid and being hungry.

“Oh, speaking of which,” I said and whistled out. Lassie's ears perked up and I waved her over then turned to Cheerilee. “Got doughnuts for the picnic.” I gave her a wink then realized... “Damn... sorry, I meant to wink but... one eye,” I mentioned then walked off with Lassie and retrieved the doughnuts.

As we came back the kids were all sitting in groups around picnic blankets. When they saw us, they all gasped in excitement. Tiara and Spoony gave sour faces as they saw what a fuss the other kids were giving over Lassie and I. One colt cheered out. “Alright! DOUGHNUTS! Lassie, you're the bestest dog ever!” he said aloud. All the other kids cheered too and Tiara tried to interupt.

“Well 'I' brought something just as...” she trailed off and looked back. I tried to follow her stare but couldn't match it. There was a stockpile of food on some school desks that Cheerilee had probably brought out earlier.

Lassie set the doughnuts down and all the kids rushed up to get something to eat. Ms. Cheerilee, Lassie and i stood back and watched them, a lot of them huddling over to the doughnuts. I chuckled to myself. “Kids huh? They're great,” I said to the other two who nodded in return before Lassie spoke up.

“Yeah, they really are great.” I looked to Lassie and wondered to myself.

“Hey Lassie... I never knew you were so good with colts and fillies... what gives?” I asked and she just shrugged.

“Dunno... hey, you should have a kid,” she suggested but I just tossed my head from side to side. “Oh come on. Then I could totally train it to be my faithful little minion,” she joked and I just shook my head.

“If I ever have a kid... I'm not letting you turn it into a minion,” I told her to which she gave a jokingly disappointed face.

As the kids all took their spots again one spoke up, the cow looking colt, Pips. “Hey Lassie, can you do some magic?” he asked, antsy and excited to see her do something.

Tiara again spoke up in a rather snooty tone. “Oh please. It's not anything special. Unicorns can do magic all the time,” she interjected. Lassie removed her hat, MY hat, then rubbed her head.

“No horn... I can't do magic...” she trailed off then pulled a bunny from my hat... it was Angel Bunny. "Or can I?!" she asked aloud.

“A... Angel?” I asked and he gave an irritated chatter. The kids all gasped and Lassie stuffed him back in the hat. I rushed over and looked but... he was no longer there.

“He... hey how'd you do that?!” I gasped in utter disbelief. Lassie shook her paw.

“A magician... never reveals her secrets,” she replied while putting my hat back on. Tiara just scoffed. Lassie looked to her and pointed. “Tiara, would you be so kind as to be my assistant for the next act?” she asked and Tiara just gave a 'Humph' as she walked up.

“I won't be surprised. This isn't real magic. Just tricks,” she said. Lassie stood to her hindlegs, reached into my coat she was wearing and with one paw, pulled out a deck of cards. However she did it in a really cool way where the deck flew towards her paw and wasn't just stacked in her paw already.

The crowd of kids watched in awe. Lassie spread the card deck out. “Okay... pick a card, any card,” Lassie offered and Tiara picked a card. Lassie withdrew the deck and stacked it again. “Okay now show your card to the crowd so they can see, but don't show me.” Tiara showed the card. It was the three of hearts. She then gave it back to Lassie who put it on the top of the deck and began to shuffle it in bizarre ways like making the cards zoom from one paw to the other or doing that one thing where the user holds the two halves of a deck in both hands then flicks them together.

Finally, she flipped over the deck of cards, sorted through it then looked to Tiara and the crowd. “So... is it correct that I didn't see the card you randomly drew from this deck?” Tiara nodded. “So I wouldn't know that... this!” she said, pulling out the three of hearts, “Is your card.” Most of the class gasped and I just looked in amazement. How'd she do that? Did she mark the card somehow?

Tiara however, was not impressed. “Oh please, that's just a silly old card trick,” she scoffed. Lassie moved over to the tables and moved some things aside.

“Okay, let's do another.” she said, taking out what looked to be roughly twenty cards from the deck and giving them to Tiara. “Pick a card, again, don't tell me what it is.” Tiara picked a card and showed it to the audience who had now circled around the table. This time, it was the ten of spades. “Okay, now put it back in the small pile,” she said.

Tiara did as asked and quickly shuffled the deck of twenty-ish cards, probably in an attempt to make sure Lassie couldn't find out what card it was. Lassie just smiled, took the cards, placed them in three columns of seven, all facing up... so there was twenty one cards. “Which pile is your card in?” she asked and Tiara gave her a look. “Just part of the magic,” she said and Tiara pointed to the first pile. Lassie picked up another pile, then the pile her card was in and finally the last pile then put the cards out again. “Okay... now which pile is your card in?” she asked and this time Tiara spoke up.

“I know what you're doing. You're just figuring out which card is mine, this isn't magic,” she said and Lassie just rolled her eyes before Tiara pointed to a pile. “This one,” she said and Lassie again took another pile first, then her pile, then the last pile. She did this once more before placing the cards out on the table, all face down.

“Now... I can't see what the cards are correct?” she asked and everypony but Tiara nodded. “So even if I did somehow... 'magically' know your card... I wouldn't be able to know that...” she grabbed a card and held it up. “This! Is your card!” Lassie announced, showing the three of clubs. Tiara snickered.

“HA! Not even close!” she cackled and Lassie looked at the card then to the audience.

“Is this her card?” she asked but everypony shook their heads. She grabbed another one, this time an ace of diamonds. “How about this one?” she asked but again everypony shook their heads.

Tiara cackled. “Ha! So much for your spectacular magic show,” she laughed insultingly. Lassie flipped all the cards.

“Which one is your card?” she asked and Tiara looked down then went wide eyed just as everypony else looked as well. In the pile, there was no ten of spades. Lassie looked to Tiara. “Say... do you bathe often?” Lassie asked and Tiara took insult to her question.

“Of course I do! I'm not a dirty poor pony,” she snapped and Lassie rubbed her chin.

“So... do you wash behind your ears?” she asked and Tiara nodded.

“Of course I do!” she said, aggrivated at the fact Lassie was poking at her. Lassie reached forwards.

“So... why is it that...” she reached behind Tiara's ear and pulled out the ten of spades. “This card is behind you ear?” she asked, the crowd gasping as she showed them the card.

Tiara sputtered in disbelief. “T-t-that's... that's m-my... card,” she said in astonishment and Lassie rubbed her chin in a curious way.

“If it's your card... the one that was in the deck... what in Equestria was it doing behind your ear?” she asked. I looked down and quickly counted the cards in my mind. There was twenty one cards so she didn't take the card before she laid them down... or had she? Then how'd she replace the card?

Lassie smiled and began to do all sorts of tricks. Some of them were kind of corny, but some of them really left me puzzled. “And now... filles and gentle-colts, ladies and stallions!” she announced triumphantly. “I shall... oh wait... yo Cheerilee, can you spare me a bit?” she asked and the teacher gave her a look. “I'll give it back, I promise,” she said and Cheerilee just shrugged and offered her a bit.

Lassie looked at it... and looked at it... and looked at it. “Okay... so this... right here in my paw... is solid matter right?” she asked and everypony nodded. “So it'd be near impossible for me to just vaporize it with my bare paws, not having a unicorn horn and all.” The crowd nodded. She pressed it between her two paws, raised her paws in the air and began to grunt in effort, squeezing the coin with all her might.

After a moment or two, she brought her paws down, backside of her paw to us then opened them up, wiggling her paw digits to assure us it wasn't hidden between her paws. To our utter amazement, the bit was gone. I just stood there, slack jawed and unable to believe it. Okay... I know this is Equestria and it's full of magic and stuff but... “What?” I gasped along with several others.

There was a small round of applause before Cheerilee spoke up. “Uhm... you did say you'd give me my bit back?...” she asked, unsure about this. Lassie rubbed her chin.

“Why yes... I did say that didn't I?” She rubbed her chin again then looked to me. “But how in Celestia's name will I give it back if it disappeared?” she asked aloud. “Hmm... now that is a toughie...” she trailed off and looked more keenly on me. “But what if I were... say... turn something else, back into your bit?” she asked and everyone looked at her.

She walked up to me on her hindlegs and poked her claw at the collar of my cape dress and pants. “Hey what are you...” but I trailed off as she began pulling on some of the loose fabric strings and began running off with it, undoing the sewing job. As she pulled away, bits started falling off me and everypony's eyes went wide. "Wha... what the fu..."

In moments, the cape dress and pants were gone and all that was left was a bunch of bits, and me... standing in my underwear and the little hat she had given me earlier. The kids were wide eyed.

Lassie came back, a mouthful of string in her mouth just before she spat it out. “Okay kids, there's ten bits for everypony so share it. I don't wanna hear about anypony not getting their money,” she said and the class blinked. “Seriously, take it... it's free, really.” As she said that the kids rushed up and grabbed the coins, splitting them equally just as asked.

Lassie then looked to Cheerilee. “Oh yeah... I still owe you your bit huh?” she asked then somehow snapped with her paw while tossing her front leg up in the air. A gleaming bit shot up and landed smack square in the middle of her paw. “Para usted,” she said and I blinked. She knew Mexican... err, Spanish... or maybe it was Portuguese... it sounded Mexican.

Cheerilee blinked in amazement and gracefully took the coin back. I suddenly felt aware that I was almost naked in public. “Uhm Lassie... cool trick and all but... by chance did you bring me any extra clothes?” I asked. She nodded, taking off the duster and hat and giving them to me. I looked at her then to my legs. "Pants?" I asked but she shook her head while biting her bottom lip, giving me a sultry gaze.

“You wouldn't fit in my pants,” she said with a sexual connotation tone. I just rolled my eyes and slipped on the clothes. She grabbed the magic hat and tossed it to one of the kids. “Maybe it'll make you magical too,” she said with a wink and the kids all rushed over.

“Thank you Mrs. Lassie, you're the best!” they all squealed. Lassie took a bow.

“No children, thank you,” she thanked their applause as they cheered. After a moment they rushed off to go play again, some grabbing extra food before they went. Lassie walked up to Cheerilee and myself. “I'm Ms. Lassie. Mrs. Lassie was my mother... she was a bitch,” she said to the two of us.

Both Cheerilee and I looked to her in disbelief. “I... I... how?” I asked and she looked to me.

“How what?”

“How'd you... do that?” I asked and Lassie shrugged.

“Which trick?” she asked and I was to baffled to speak really.

Cheerilee spoke up, able to piece together her thoughts. “All of them.”

Lassie sighed. “Well, the card tricks range in difficulty but they are, as I just said, merely tricks. The coins... that was tough,” she said and we listened to her speak. “Did you notice the outfit was... a little heavier than it should've been?” she asked and I thought back.

“Yeah. I noticed but it wasn't really super heavy so I didn't say anything.”

Lassie nodded. “Yeah, I worked a few days in Ponyville, doing odd jobs like cutting grass and such to gather up enough money to make this cool. So then I had Rarity stitch together this uniform, but stitch the weave extra thick so she could secretly stitch coins into the uniform as well. Then, all I had to do was pull apart the sewing and... voila,” she told us her secret.

We were so baffled that we nearly forgot how the trick started and Cheerilee brought that up. “So... how'd you make my coin disappear?” she asked, intrigued by the trick and Lassie grabbed my right arm and pulled it down, showing her the inside of my coat arm.

“I had Rarity stitch me a secret pocket. When I brought my paws down, I made sure I had the backside facing the crowd so when I dropped the coin early, they didn't see it fall into the secret pocket. Then when I flicked my leg up in the air it flew out of the pocket... easy when you figure out how it's done huh?” We both nodded. We all flumped down to our rumps and just relaxed in peace.

We sat, mostly in silence, watching the children all play together. The one who had gotten the hat pretended to be a magician, casting spells with a wand, which was really just a stick found in the playground. Fun really, considering this world had real magic yet the simple influence of a dog could let their imaginations run wild.

Before I knew it... before either one of knew it really, the day was over. The school bell rang and everypony was a little startled. They quickly scurried to get their things, giving Ms. Cheerilee, Lassie and I... mostly Lassie, a very heartwarming farewell. The three of us walked up to the doorway of the school and stood idly as the children departed.

I stood on one side of the doorway, while Cheerilee stood on the other side and Lassie simply plopped herself down in the middle as we watched the kids walk off into the sunset town, some with their parents, others in groups. My... chest, my heart I guess... I felt really weird, like I had been feeling lately. It didn't feel like a bad feeling just... different.

“Really is something huh? Watching them go,” I commented and Cheerilee nodded with a sigh.

“I know... saddening when I see them leave. I always wonder when the next time I'll see them is... if ever at all,” she replied and Lassie snorted a laugh.

“Monday probably,” she said seriously, but in a laughable way. We both shot her a glare. She held her front legs up defensively. “What?! Seriously, you'll probably see them Monday. It's not like there isn't school next week. Summer holidays doesn't start till the week after,” she spoke in her defense.

“That's not the point Lassie... she meant it differently... 'we' meant it differently,” I told her and she cocked an eyebrow.

“What? Like... those are your kids and you're watching them go off to collage? Or moving out or something?” she asked and we both nodded, Cheerilee speaking our minds in a very breath taken tone.

“Yes... something like that,” she cooed and I smiled, the setting sun feeling really nice on my exposed skin. Lassie looked to me.

“Yeah... well... while you two act like pedophiles I'm gonna loot the food that's left over into the box of your truck. I want some of the melons, they're good,” she commented and I just groaned. She always had a... Lassie moment. I had no other word for it. One moment she'd be totally understanding, loving, everything... next moment she's a total pervert or just speaks her mind with absolutely no filter whatsoever.

As Lassie left, Cheerilee looked to me. “Thank you... thank you for coming today. It meant the world to not just the children but to me as well.” She smiled. I went to wink but quickly remembered my eye problem... damn, who would've thought living with just one eye was so difficult? I gave her a thumbs up and she must've known it meant something good, either that or she was just returning my bright smile.

We stood there in silence, just watching the late afternoon sun cast its orange gaze over the horizon. After a little while, Lassie whistled out to us. “Okay you two, seriously, I'll call the cops if you don't stop eyeing up foals,” she laughed then waved me over. “Come on, drive me home already before this stuff goes bad.” I gave a nod to Cheerilee but she tugged at my duster coat before I could leave.

“If it's... not too much to ask, and not out of your way... would you mind giving me a ride home?” she asked and I nodded with a smile. “I'll just be a moment.” She went back into the classroom, grabbing some things and cleaning up. Lassie whistled at me again.

“Come on man,” she said, through a mouthful of honeydew melon.

“Lassie just... just wait!” I hissed at her and she rolled her eyes like a flustered kid. Cheerilee returned and trotted over to the passenger side door of my truck where Lassie held out her paw for her.

“My lady,” Lassie said in a very chauffeur like tone. Cheerilee nodded with appreciation and stepped in, taking a seat and fidgeting slightly.

“Oh my... this is rather... different,” she commented. Lassie hopped up over her lap, then reached over and slammed the door before taking middle seat. I started the truck and Cheerilee sighed. “I remember when I first met you... the chauffeur for The Cutie Mark Crusaders... you were so...” she trailed off and I sighed.

“Arrogant, hard headed, brash... an as-” I cut myself off, biting my lower lip. “A butthole,” I said and she snickered a bit.

“Yes... quite. Maybe not to that extent but... you were really not the friendliest. But, as with everypony, you deserved a chance at least. Plus I had heard you were struggling because you were the only one of your kind from a different word. I could imagine how tough that may be. And through all that hard, crusty exterior... I saw a little colt, who did care enough to help out three little fillies,” she said with a bright and high pitched tone. “And now look at you. I wouldn't even suspect you to be the way you used to be,” she commented and I nodded.

“Thanks... it means a lot,” I said and she nodded before placing her hoof over Lassie's lap and onto my elbow, my hand being a little out of reach as I was operating the steering wheel.

“I'm sorry... about the way I acted when we first met. It's really embarrassing and I do wish it hadn't happened the way it had,” she apologized but I just nodded in reply.

“Me too... me too. I mean, not that I wish you hadn't met me like that, but I mean... I wish I hadn't been such a dink towards you... being brash and all. I was kind of a real arse,” I apologized and she nodded.

“I forgive you, and I understand why you acted the way you did,” she said and I nodded.

“Thanks. It really means a lot,” I said, driving with one hand while I put her hoof into my free hand. Lassie put her paw over top my hand. I drove through the town at a calm pace. Cheerilee looked at the dash and rubbed her hoof across it.

“It's an... interesting mode of transportation,” she informed me and I nodded.

“Her name is Cadence... and no, not like the princess. This is Cadence, she is my truck.” I smiled, continuing to drive through the town with ease. Lassie played with the radio and pretty soon the COPS theme song was playing again. Cheerilee looked at the radio and listened, then noticed the music was also playing from speakers in the door.

“Wow... interesting,” she commented, fascinated by the vehicle. Lassie nodded.

“Yeah. We're secretly cops on our spare time, eating doughnuts and drinking coffee while we could be busting perps,” she joked. Cheerilee looked to me, having only heard Lassie's voice which sounded serious along with the look she gave. Lassie quickly broke down and burst into laughter, I just rolled my eye and Cheerilee giggled.

After another few moments, we arrived to Cheerilee's house. I stopped the truck, stepped out and walked around to Cheerilee's side to help her out, rather than try to explain how to open the door which seemed to prove difficult for a lot of ponies.

Helping her out, I wasn't really expecting the kiss to the cheek she gave me. “Thank you again. And hopefully I'll see you soon,” she said and with that she trotted towards her house door.

I closed the passenger door and quickly hopped back into the driver seat. Lassie had, at this point, gotten back into her usual spot riding shotgun. “So... you guys seemed to be really... how should I put this... apologetic about when you first met... what happened?” she asked and I just shrugged but Lassie interjected before I could even speak. “And don't say it was just nothing cause I 'KNOW' it was something,” she said and I just sighed.

“I was an asshole like I usually was at that time... and she was... in heat,” I said and Lassie's eyes went wide.

“WOAH! Hold on! I thought you were a vir-” but I cut her short.

“We didn't have sex! We just... kinda... jerked off together a day later... or well, I jerked off and she...” I trailed off, trying to think of a way to put 'jerking off' into female context.

“Flicked her bean?” Lassie asked and I just kind of snickered from the way she put it.

“Yeah uhh... yeah, she... uhhm...” I trailed off and Lassie nodded.

“Ah yes... the pleasure in butterin' the biscuit,” she said and I just blushed, looking away as I drove back to the library. “You ever wonder what if feels like for females to buff the muff?” she asked and I just face-palmed.

“Can we not?” I asked, not wanting to get into the topic. Twilight broke down into a panic when she found out something happened between Cheerilee and me, thinking I had actually had sex with her and was moving out and everything. Where Lassie on the other hand just got... well, Lassie, there's no other way to put it.

Lassie nodded. “Oh... we so are getting into this topic. What's it like when you beat the meat? What's it like to feel yourself building up then bursting like a volcano, plastering your steamy hot load all over the place?” she asked sensually, fluffing her eyes at me.

“Good I guess, but the thought of it disturbs me cause I think you might watch me while I do it,” I replied and she giggled.

“Nah dude. You're too much macho for my taste. I'd rather a colt that's a little more feeble. Somepony I could really feel in charge of, not somepony I'd feel is just being delicate to me. I want to really feel like I'm getting their one hundred and ten percent while they fuck me silly,” she said and I just rolled my eye.

“Can we not talk about this?” I asked but she shook her head.

“That is to say, it's not like I haven't thought about you before while I clubbed the clam-” I cut her off.

“Enough with these ridiculous phrases!” I exclaimed but she continued anyway.

“Dipping my paw into my honey pot, thinking about my master, the one who owns me... as he bends me over and makes me his bitch, driving his cock deep inside me and filling my womb with his juices then as I fill up completely and can't take another ounce, his essence seeps out of me, leaking down the backside of my legs-” I hammered the brakes.

“Can you please stop Lassie! It's disturbing. Maybe another time it would be funny or entertaining but this is just... weird,” I pleaded with her and she went a little wide eyed.

“Oh... I'm sorry..." she trailed off and exhaled in shame. "It's just that I get excited is all... I'm still a virgin you know,” she added in the last part rather timidly and I just sighed.

“Just... listen. I know I'm never really super outgoing with my sexual urges but that's because I keep them really buried deep down. So deep down that I don't recognize them half the time,” I told her and she chuckled, saying something about 'Captain fucking obvious'. “I know everyone is different but... please, just try to act a little more... controlled. Okay?” I asked and she nodded.

“Okay... but that means that when I do go on a rant, you have to join in too, okay?” she suggested excitedly. I sighed.

“Okay-” I began and she wheezed in a deep breath of excitement, as if ready to explode. “BUT! It can't be all the time and it ESPECIALLY can't be when colts or fillies are around,” I said and she rolled her eyes.

“Well duh! You seen what I'm like with kids. They love me and not once do I screw around sexually like I do with adults,” she said and I nodded.

“Okay... we're good?” I asked and she nodded before leaning over and taking a deep whiff of my shoulder. I was at first confused but as she distracted me with the sniff, she rubbed my crotch. “EH! LASSIE!” I gasped and she rolled her eyes.

“Dude, I need something to visualize tonight while I'm polishing my pearl.” I just dipped my head as we finally arrived to the library. I shut off the truck and we both got out. Twilight met us at the door but Lassie zipped past and down to the basement, the audible sound of the door locking shut echoed throughout the library.

Twilight looked to me and I just shrugged. “Long day... she needs some time alone,” I said and Twilight brought a hoof to her mouth.

“Is she going to be okay?!” she asked in worry but I just chuckled.

“Oh... no. I mean yes. She's going to be fine. Nothing bad happened. She just needs to... relieve some built up stress,” I said, making it a little PG. Twilight rose an eyebrow in curiosity then remembered who we were talking about and caught the drift.

Spike came over with a dish of nachos. His body looked a little tensed up and... he was a little bulkier. His muscles we finally starting to show real form and tone. He must've been working out earlier today. “Hey Spike,” I greeted. “Lookin' good. You've been working out, I can tell,” I said with a glowing smile.

He smiled and looked at himself, flexing one arm while still holding the dish of nachos in his spare hand, or claw... whatever dragons called it. He looked back to me. “Really? Is it actually noticeable? Do you think Rarity would notice? You think she'd like it?” he asked out in a blur. I blinked and shrugged.

“I dunno... maybe? Who's to say what she likes and doesn't like. You'd have to ask her yourself,” I told him and his face drooped a little as he walked away.

“That's the only problem,” he stated, walking away solemnly. I reached my hand out to him, as if to gesture him to stop.

“Wait Spike, I'm sure she'd like it!” I called out but he kept walking away. I dipped my head with a sigh. With my hands over my face, I let out an exhausted groan as I flopped down on the couch. “Oh man... I need a nap,” I muttered, forgetting how much energy school takes out of me, despite the lack of actual physical activity involved.

Twilight stepped up to the side of the couch and looked at me with a cocked eyebrow. “Have you eaten today?” she asked and I nodded. “What?” she asked again.

“I had some fruits and stuff at lunch time,” I replied, remembering the short breaks in between conversations that Cheerilee and I had to get some food.

“Are you still hungry? Spike made nachos,” she offered but I shook my head.

“It's okay,” I replied but she just sighed, turned towards the kitchen and began trotting away.

“I'll make you some anyway. You never know, you might just be hungry when you smell them,” she implied and I just smiled with an exhausted exhale.

“Mares,” I muttered with a faint smile, rolling over on the couch and facing the backrest as I quickly dozed off...

* * *

Twilight's perspective...

I put the plate of steamy hot, cheesy nachos on my mitted hoof and walked back into the living room. I returned to Evan's side at the couch and hovered the nachos near him, so he could smell their aroma.

However, despite this, he didn't even stir. “Evan?” I asked but I got no response. I used my magic to set the nachos aside then leaned over to listen to him. He was dozing peacefully, without a care in the world.

I smiled as I shook my head, muttering to myself with a smile while I rolled my eyes. “Stallions...”

* * *

Burdy's perspective,

Stalingrad...

The floor of the building shook, making me realize I was in a dark, cold place. Small rocks and debris cluttered down on me while the building shook from the massive bomber planes that flew overhead. Despite the considerably low temperatures, it didn't feel all so bad... almost as if I were used to it. The sound of planes flying overhead caught my attention, along with the racket in the streets outside.

I stood up, though a little difficult due to a bit of stiffness that I quickly pushed away. I grabbed a rifle that lay beside me... my rifle. 'Wait... why do I think it's my rifle?' I wondered as I picked up the battered SVT-40.

Holding the fore-grip with my left hand, I slid a magazine into the gun then pulled the stock up to my shoulder while I reached forwards with my right and racked back the bolt handle, letting it slam shut naturally and chamber a round.

I quickly crept through the shadows, doing my best to avoid the creaky parts of the floor. My breathing was a little raspy and I could see my breath. It was the depth of winter, late December... already a few months into this battle. 'Wait... what year is it? Where am I? How do I know what battle it is if I don't even know what battle it is?' I thought to myself.

The sounds of German voices caught my attention and I crept silently up to a wall, pressing myself against it and listening to the soldier's voices as they clumsily tromped through the building. I couldn't understand what they were saying but I could tell they were irritated about something, and vastly complaining about it. They sounded a little hungry... and cold.

I slowly crept over to the edge of the wall then spun out. Their eyes all went wide. There was six of them in total. I already had my rifle lifted and swung the sights towards the center mass of my first target. I fired once, the impact staggering him. I fired again, then a third time, knocking him back and into two others. The other three began lifting their weapons. I swung my rifle and popped a high shot on the fourth soldier, hitting his head and pinging off his helmet while the top part of his skull shattered, spewing crimson onto the others.

The others, despite being covered in their friend's brain matter, lifted their guns on me, one armed with a rifle, the other a submachine gun. I jerked on the trigger of my rifle while I backpedaled, blasting off the remaining shots in my rifle with quick succession. I wasn't sure if I had hit anyone with those shots but I didn't stay to find out, quickly leaping through a doorway as all hell broke lose.

Screaming in the hallway was quickly followed by the chatter of automatic fire. I hugged my body to the floor as bullets ripped through the walls of the old battered building. Rubble and light dust cluttered down on me as the Germans blasted a bit high, spraying where my body would be if I were standing.

I reached into my heavy coat and pulled out what to me looked like a can of preserved goods, perhaps beans, but it had a little protruding top with a pin and lever. I yanked the pin out and released my finger from over top the lever, letting it spring free.

Tossing the can shaped grenade back into the hallway, there was a brief instance where a scream could be heard, followed by a deafening explosion that echoed in the hallways, making my hearing go mute for a moment.

My sense of balance was briefly off-put but quickly returned, albeit, without my hearing. I grabbed my rifle and stood up, quickly reloading the spent magazine. I peaked down the hallway and made sure it was clear then proceeded down the hallways, towards the sound of the gunfire in the streets below.

I reached a room which for the most part had been utterly destroyed. I navigated my way past all the rubble and to a small broken opening in the wall, avoiding the windows nearby. I looked down to the streets below, seeing my fellow comrades fighting the oppressive Germans who scattered the streets, accompanied by tanks.

I racked back the bolt on my rifle and placed the end of the fore-grip on the rubble ledge, being cognoscente not to let my rifle barrel protrude out the window. The shots wouldn't be terribly difficult to make, probably around two hundred meters meters, give or take for each target...

I reached up to the rear notch sight of my rifle and gently elevated the slide to the '2' designation. I made myself comfortable and began to control my breathing as I lined up the first shot, putting the tip of my front sight on the target's chest as I gently squeezed the trigger.

The gun tried to jerk but I kept it as still as I could. The muzzle compensator blew gasses to the sides, spewing up some dust and small rocks. My shot was masked by the sounds of fighting from down below.

I lined up a second shot with yet another target and fired with similar results. I began dropping Germans like flies, only stopping to reload. Soon enough, the heat from the barrel began to give off a mirage effect, the steam vapors impairing my aim. I muttered a silent curse but no sooner had I, a chunk of wall erupted beside my face, spewing debris into my cheek.

I crawled back staggeringly and in just seconds, a second shot whizzed past the side of my neck, just grazing my shoulder. Despite not being a direct hit, the shot still shocke me, forcing a slight wince of pain.

I leapt u and ran into the deths of the building. “Fuck... a sniper,” I swore, without telling myself to say that. Dribbles of blood leaked from my shoulder as I rushed along through the rubble, keeping myself low. I found another spot. A place where the concrete wall had partially given way and left a small see hole in the wall.

I looked through the hole and searched for my formidable enemy, but he was well hidden... The only reason I knew he wasn't on ground level was due to the fact he had struck me after I had staggered back into the building from his first shot.

I decided perhaps to lure him out. I kicked away some more of the rubble to make my shots more visible. I set the rifle down but protruded the barrel out about five inches, to let my muzzle flash be even more evident. I began lining up shots and firing, taking out soldier after soldier, just waiting until-

A piece of wall shattered beside my face, spewing even more coarse debris into my face, this time on the opposite cheek. He either wasn't a very good shot, or was far away. I pulled my rifle back for one moment.

Reaching up to my head, I took off the ushanka hat which, up until now, I hadn't know I was wearing. I grabbed a piece of window frame and used it to hoist my hat. I snuck around and found a large window with a small hole in the wall beneath.

Again I baited myself out by protruding my rifle barrel out the hole and firing wildly at the enemy force. After expending a full magazine's worth of ammo, I jacked my hat up slowly, towards the large window. Very slowly I let the hat come into view of anyone watching, while at the same time watching for the telltale sign of a sniper.

There was a moment's pause before a glint of light shone, some three hundred meters away on a rooftop balcony, followed by my hat being torn into shreds. The stick was ripped from my hands. It had served its purpose.

I crawled away and to another location. It would be a helluva shot with open sights, especially those on my SVT-40. Taking a flight of decrepit stairs, I found myself on a higher level and set myself up in a relatively open spot, but I only needed to use it briefly. The room had been blasted apart an there was barely any cover, but that didn't bother me.

I laid flat and pulled myself to the edge of the floor, then rested my rifle down, quickly reloading it before scanning for my opposition. I found him out rather quickly. He was, at minimum, two hundred and seventy meters, probably more. I set the rear notch sight to the '3' setting and gently rested the rifle fore-grip on my left forearm.

My enemy hadn't moved spots, probably because he figured I was dead and that none of my comrades below knew of his presence... oh how wrong he was. I steadied my aim and began to gently squeeze back until I knew I had hit her sweet spot. Any more pressure and she'd go off.

I took a moment and closed my eyes, just imagining it happening before it truly did. My eyes slowly opened, the darkness of the bloody battlefield nearly blinding me from it's horror. My challenge awaited me. I finished the squeeze, making sure to hold the rifle tight to minimize the recoil that might off-put the rifle's already somewhat poor harmonics.

It was like everything slowed enough for me to see the bullet fly, the vapor trail whizzing behind it. Flying through the air at sonic speeds, the bullet quickly reached it's destination. The bullet slammed into the left forearm of my perpetrator before drilling into his chest, puncturing his lung and finally blowing out his back side and knocking him back.

I took a moment to savour the feel. The feel of a hunt completed. Movement caught my eye, or rather, important movement on the enemy's grounds snagged my attention. A tank commander was barking orders just as a tank turret aimed at my position.

Eyes wide, I leapt up and began to run back into the depths of the building, but it was too late. An eruption behind me sent me catapulting through the walls and subsequently down the decrepit old floors that crumbled beneath the quake of the explosion. I fell through floor after floor, sometimes trying to catch myself with the next level but always failing as the resulting impact further knocked the wind out of me.

I finally crashed against a solid surface. I laid on my back, groaning in pain from both the fall and the explosion that had nearly claimed my life. Orders that were being barked in German echoed through the hallways nearby.

I tried to get up but no sooner had I, a rifle butt-stock battered me in the face, knocking me back down while my head spun. One of the numerous soldiers began to say something, rather angrily at that.

Another one said something but then there was an audible smacking sound, like someone had just been slapped across the cheek. I looked, my vision a little blurry, as one soldier dressed in officer uniform, stepped up and drew his fancy Luger pistol on me. Just as he was about to fire, the wall beside him shattered apart. A hulking mass broke through the wall and tackled the officer, along with two others, to the ground while his handgun went off.

A large man straddled a DP machine gun in his arms and quickly lit up the remaining troops. Screams, along with the chugging of his machine gun, could be heard throughout the building as they were slain.

After a brief fanfare, the man dropped the smoking gun, and drew a twin set of Tokarev pistols, using them to execute the Germans he had tackled during his grand entrance. Finally looking to me, I realized it was my old comrade. “Getting into trouble again?” he asked cheerily, to which I just rolled my eyes as he helped me up.

I rolled my shoulders and stretched out my back. He was about to say something, when the shout of a German interrupted him. A small stick with a piece of metal hooked to it clinked towards us. Derreck's eyes went wide as he pushed me behind himself. I could feel the blast but he had stopped the immediate danger with his own body.

Our bodies were tossed back a few feet. Luckily the hand grenade hadn't landed too close to us. Derreck groaned and I shuffled out from under him to examine his injuries. His face was bloody but there was two noticeable cuts. One going straight down the right side of his face while the other was an angled slice that traveled across his face, making an 'X' on his right cheek.

The final wound was a piece of shrapnel lodged in his left cheek, which he promptly pulled out, also pulling out some meat. He tossed the metal and stuffed the hanging meat back inside his face just as a few Germans popped around the corner. He quickly drew his twin set of pistols and peppered them down.

Despite peppering the group, the pistols's lack of kinetic force left a few of them staggering but still able to fight. With absolute, and partially improbable and ridiculously unbelievable, finesse, Derreck tossed his handguns into the air, the spent magazines flying out. Reaching into his coat, he pulled out two fresh magazines and tossed them up. The magazines matched perfectly into the magazine wells and as the pistols landed in his hands, he thumbed the slide release and peppered the staggering Germans.

Derreck looked back to me, a fury burning in his eyes like nothing I had ever seen...

* * *

I awoke with a gasp, profuse sweat making my body stick to the couch a little. “Ugh...” I groaned as I rolled back over. “Man... what a messed up dream,” I muttered to myself. My conscious spoke up.

'How do you know it was just a dream?' it asked and I rolled my eyes. “Cause I'm not old enough to have fought in World War Two... dur,” I said back, feeling foolish for talking to myself.

Through the sound of my heavy heartbeat, I heard hooves trotting down the stairs, followed by a saint-like voice. “Evan, honey are you alright?” my mother asked and I nodded to myself.

“Yeah... yeah just... bad dreams,” I replied. I stroked the sides of my head attentively, wondering why on earth I would've had a dream so vivid and historic like that.

“Would you maye want to... come sleep with me? I can keep you company,” she offered and I nodded, standing up and drowsing my way up the stairs. I followed her into bed and crashed beside her. She wrapped her hooves around me and I fell asleep in her safe embrace...

Chapter 40

Author's Note

It is/was Remembrance Day today, at least for Canada anyways. I hope you all, like me, took a moment to remember all those who served and continue to serve. Ironic really, the one day of the year average people actually give a thought about veterans and such, then the next day they go on like nothing happened, well that's the way the Canadian vet speaking at a ceremony put it... sad but true really. Put it to us, we're a bunch of dinks that take freedom for granted sometimes.

Anyways, sadness aside, cheers everyone/pony... eh

Chapter 40

'I did it. It was me...'

I awoke, a little abruptly, but quickly calmed. It was a little on the cool side and I was only partly covered by a blanket...

I looked and realized I wasn't sleeping on the couch where I had fallen asleep late last evening. I looked and memories from last night quickly resurfaced. I took a deep inhale and rested easy on the knowledge that I was safe and sound, well, for the most part.

I got up and stretched my body out. Checking my watch, which I hadn't taken off last night, I realized it was early in the morning, 4:31am to be exact. I moseyed downstairs and slipped into the shower for a brief, yet mind numbing shower. It was so comfortable in the steamy shower and I could probably just stand here for hours, despite being crammed into a pony sized shower.

After about ten minutes, which was too short in my opinion, I stepped out and dried off, but didn't put any of my old clothes back on. Instead I made my way to the basement and fetched a new pair of clothes: a white V-neck and some faded blue jeans. Finally I slipped my watch and holy necklace back on, along with my eye patch.

Feeling a little hungry, I made my way back upstairs and popped some waffles in the toaster. It was strange really. I felt... at home, and due to my rather poor memory I couldn't really visualize my original home from back on earth. “Damn high-school football,” I muttered, remembering the numerous times I had concussions due to football and just slept them off, even the severe ones that were supposed to be treated 'seriously'.

My waffles pinged out of the toaster and I just ate them like I would a cookie, no syrup or anything, just raw. As I finished my morning snack, I walked back downstairs and grabbed a ten pound dumbbell before returning upstairs and scrounging through the fridge for something to drink.

“Where's my chocolate milk?...” I muttered then found a note. 'I owe you cartons of milk: Lassie'. I just groaned and looked for some juice, preferably orange, but came up with nothing. I glanced past the milk but all that was left was the mare milk from Trottingham... the one with that milk mare logo. I shuddered... “No way,” I said but I felt the leathery stickiness of my tongue smack against the roof of my mouth along with the clotted snotty feeling at the back o my throat from lack of liquids. “No way...” I trailed off and looked at the milk. “Fuck...” I groaned and grabbed two bottles before returning to the living room.

I flicked on the tube and began watching morning cartoons. As I laid on the couch, I'd mindlessly curl the light ten pound dumbbell. Every so often my one arm would get sore, so I'd rotate my body to the other end of the couch and begin to use the other arm.

At first I still contemplated the milk, but ended up forcing the thought of it coming from a pony and began drinking it. It wasn't bad... actually it was really good, spectacular even... “Ugh,” I shivered a groan as I visualized a horse being milked and said milk being the substance I was drinking. I just wanted to gag. But I suppose if I had been brought up on it as opposed to cow milk, it might be different... or if I hadn't worked on a dairy farm... but I suppose back home on earth their wasn't horse dairy farms... ech, it's still creepy as Tartarus. Great, now I'm speaking even more pony words.

Hours past before Spike and Twilight arose. Lassie hadn't gotten up yet but I suppose she'd sleep in considering how much effort she had put in yesterday, playing with the kids and her whole magic charade.

As I laid like a sloth, a body-building sloth, my mother came to the couch side. “Are you feeling okay this morning?” she asked and I nodded, looking to her but secretly watching the cartoons through my peripheral vision.

“Yeah, I'm doing pretty good... well, minus the fact some dog-o-mine drank all the chocolate milk... doing fine. Why?” I asked and she just shook her head.

“Just wondering. You were sweating pretty bad last night even after you had settled in bed, you were still fidgeting a bit and your heart was racing,” she commented and I just shrugged, setting down the dumbbell weight and just raising my hands in a 'ah dunno' way. She didn't say anything at first and I turned my attention back to the television.

After another few minutes, Twilight spoke again. “Oh, I almost forgot... actually, I did forget to tell you last night. Applejack wants to see you today. She said it's important.” I turned to her but she didn't say anything.

“Did she say what it was?” I asked but she shook her head. 'Dammit... probably needs help working. My first Saturday off in like forever and I get stuck working... ack, whatever, I'm no slouch. It'll probably be easy for me anyway.'

I stood up and stretched with a whinny exhale that was supposed to be a yawn. “Okay, I'll get to it then.” I brought my mother into a hug, gave her a kiss on the cheek then waved goodbye as I left.

I walked down the streets, just admiring the freedom of it all. It was nice really, when not concerned with something and just free to mingle... this place was really a paradise. The ponies were nice and I didn't have that sense that maybe someone in an alley might stab me for simple change. The world itself... don't even get me started. It was so... magical.

“Pfft...” I snickered to myself. 'Magical... yeah, really bucking magical,' I thought silently as I continued walking, now on the dirt path to the Apple Family farm. The birds in the plush trees sang beautiful notes and I couldn't help but smile.

My conscious spoke up. 'Getting soft on me?' it asked and I just shrugged. “Don't know really... it's just nice to relax once and a while... you know?” I asked back but never got a response.

Finally reaching the farm, AJ was waiting, probably for me. I walked up and gave her a bright smile. “So... what can ah do yah for?” I asked and at first she just sighed and dipped her head, looking to the ground.

Finally she looked back up to me. “Ah've... ah've been thinking lots,” she began and I nodded. “Ah know yah mean well an... really, it was kinda justifiable but...” she trailed off and I waited a few moments before speaking when she didn't.

“But?” I asked and quickly got my response.

“Yah need tah tell Rarity. Ah know yah wanna pay 'er back but yah really gotta come clean. Ah know it ain't much a mah business but... well, better that it be you tellin' her rather than her findin' out on her own... know what ah mean sugarcube?” I groaned and dipped my face into my palms.

“I'm working on it, I swear,” I promised but she shook her head.

“Yeah, well it happened over a month ago. Best tell her sooner rather than later, that way yah ain't keepin' no secrets and ah don't fell guilty keepin' secrets against muh own friends,” she said and I nodded.

I slowly rubbed my hair, then proceeded to stroke my face in a feverish way. “I... well I mean... I could always just... now?” I stammered. I wasn't ready for this. I'd rather be working on my Saturday off.

She pulled me over to a stack of hay bales and sat me down before resting a hoof on my shoulder. “Don't worry none sugarcube. Yah'll were doing the right thing... yah just mighta went a little overboard. Ah'm sure she won't be too mad about it. Just tell 'er what yah told me... besides, she does have a high opinion of yah anyway so ah highly doubt she'd get really mad at yah,” my farmer friend assured me.

I felt a little light headed, my world spinning a bit. What if she called the police? Well... I mean, Ponyville didn't have police, but authority anyway... I could get in a lot of trouble. “I just... I mean... what do yah think she's gonna say?” I asked fearfully and AJ just shrugged but gave me a heartwarming look.

“Yah won't know till yah tell her. But if yah don't tell her, it ain't doin' yah no good neither,” she said, still smiling and rubbing her hoof against my shoulder attentively. I took a deep breath and held it, counting to ten before exhaling. “Don't worry, yah won't be alone either.” I looked to her and she gave me a wink. “Ah'll come with yah tah make sure yah feel alright... ah just ain't gonna tell her for yah, got that?” she told me and I smiled, feeling a little better.

My legs felt like jelly. I didn't really want to go through with this. But AJ was right... “Now or never huh?” I said and she nodded as I stood up. “Oh man... almost makes me wish Freeze won,” I joked and she shot me a glare. “I said almost... almost,” I shuddered, a shiver rattling my spine.

She walked beside me, never leaving my side as we made our way back to Ponyville. I kept playing it through in my head. Oh man, she was going to flip shit. She'd probably have me strung by the neck... or... or... something bad. I tried thinking up a good excuse, something that was the truth but really sounded more extreme than it originally was.

Before reaching the boutique, the sound of a steam whistle sounded. I looked back to see Flim and Flam's train contraption bombing towards us as they tried to flag me down. Applejack just groaned. “Ugh... those no good, scammin'-” I cut her short.

“Yeah I know. But uhh... well, they're kinda my friends,” I told her to which she just rolled her eyes. “I know, I know... family farm scam, I know.” The train pulled to a stop, a big cloud of dust cluttering around AJ and myself.

As the dust cleared, both Applejack and I gave the brothers irritated looks as they jumped down, flat expressions on their faces as they approached me. “Did you really tell the media that we supplied your journey?” they both asked in a tone I couldn't really depict. It was so bland I couldn't tell if they were mad or...

“Well... erm... I said... that you two gave me the gear used to climb to the summit... yeah?” I replied hesitantly. They both stood there, staring right into my eyes with their own. I blinked, waiting for a response.

Suddenly they both rushed forwards with gleeful expressions, squealing in delight as the two worked together to heft me up without the use of their magic. “THIS IS WONDERFUL! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT THIS MEANS?!” They both chimed and I just rubbed the back of my head.

“Uhh... no... not really?” I stated, a little blankly at that.

“Merchandising, advertising, stock shares... oh, we're going to be rich brother, RICH!” Flam cheered. Using my left index finger, I scratched at the side of my temple. Still unsure about this. They seemed so... mad at first. Well, they didn't look mad but their plain expression and bland voices seemed... angry to me.

“Uhm... so uhh... you're not mad?” I asked and they both shook their heads, extremely wide smiles spread across their faces, smiles so wide they might just give Pinkie a run for her money.

“Why in Equestria would we be mad?” they asked and I just gave the ground in front of me a little kick, sending a pebble bouncing away.

“Uhm... well... you were kind of... didn't look happy when you first asked.” I still was a little off put. They just flicked their hooves in a somewhat flamboyant way.

“Pshaw, of course. We wanted you to be just as shocked as we were!” They both squealed like a pair of fillies.

“Uhm... well yeah... I'm a little shocked,” I said, still hesitant about this whole ordeal. Flim stood to his hindlegs, grabbed the collar of my shirt and shook me.

“Sapphire Shores asked us to make some clothing she wants to display on her next tour!” he exclaimed and I just blinked. “SAPPHIRE SHORES!” He blurted out and I still just stood their, dumbfounded, and just blinked.

After a moment's pause, I just snapped and gave them a thumbs up with both hands. “Yeeaaaahhhh... great...” I trailed off and Flim flopped back down to his hindlegs, still as jittery as a filly on Hearth's Warming.

Flam spoke up. “I know... 'we' know. We've been invited to a confrence in Mareami next week to showcase some of the gear that we designed for your expedition, along with the plans we made for you to get to the peak,” he said and I just blinked.

“But... you guys never made me plans. I just... well, kinda free-styled it all the way to the top,” I replied but they just brushed it aside.

“Of course we made you plans. Your Eagle Eye traced your path so we made a map of it, and those are the plans we're going to display,” he stated and I butted in.

“That's a bad idea. On my way down I kinda got a little lost and ended up having to jump across a gap and nearly died,” I told them warn-fully but still they just brushed the warning aside.

“Oh please. That's what the newly designed ladders are for. We're going to explain that after debriefing of your journey, we've refined some of the gear to make it even better than the original. Like the air-tanks. They now hold up to twenty five percent more oxygen. And the ladders are adjustable to make transportation easier.” They informed me and I just groaned.

“Yeah but guys I...” I just bit my lip. “Isn't that lying?” I asked but they shook their heads.

“Of course not! We're just... bending the truth a little. Exaggerating, if you will. Besides, it's not like it will hurt anypony, right?” he asked as he hopped up to his hindlegs. He began to trail circles in my chest with his hoof, giving me a sultry look. "Right, 'friend'?" he asked and I gulped.

“Well... I mean... I guess but-” They cut me off with a tight hug before leaping back onto their train and racing off. I held my finger in the air as if to say something, then ended up feeling a little like what Fluttershy probably feels like more than half the time. “Oh...” was the only thing that left my mouth.

Applejack scrapped her hoof against the dirt, forming up a tuff of dust while huffing. “Ah can't believe those two... an ah can't believe you'd just let 'em-” I put my finger to her lips.

“To each their own Applejack... I don't think those two will ever change but... they are kinda right. Who's really gonna get hurt from them saying they made plans prior to my ascent of the mountain?” I asked and she just huffed again.

“It ain't right what they do. Ah can't imagine how a pony could live with themselves doin' what they do!” I just nodded and let out a sigh.

“Everypony is different,” I said and she nodded before sighing.

“It just ain't right is all. Nothin' good ever came from lyin',” she said modestly and I nodded.

“Yeah... yeah I know... I know. Come on, I gotta go confess,” I said, as if I were a convict on trial. We continued on and finally reached Rarity's Carousel Boutique. I rubbed my face and let out a muffled groan before knocking. There was a moment's pause before Rarity's eccentric voice answered. “Come in darling, it's open.” I took a deep inhale and entered. At first, Rarity just glanced over her shoulder, still sewing together a dress. Once she saw me however, she dropped what she was doing and rushed over. “Oh Darling! It's so nice to see you!” she said, embracing me in a gentle hug.

She pulled out a small flip mirror and looked at herself then shuddered. “Oh dear... I look hideous. You really should've told me you'd be stopping by, then at least I could've tidied myself up a little,” she said in a disappointed voice but I just gave her a nudge.

“Nah, you look fine... better than I do,” I said, stroking my beard which I had yet to shave. Technically I should've done that first thing when I left the hospital but... now I had a month and a half... probably older, beard growing.

She just blushed timidly and giggled. “Oh darling, it's nothing. Just a little cosmetic work and you'd look stunning,” she assured me, as if I were some fashion model in need of a pedicure.

“Bah... I'll just have to get a haircut-” but she cut me short.

“IDEA!” she chimed in her usual tone. Her horn lit up and in moments, a pair of scissors, a razor and some shaving cream floated over while a chair came over and took my feet out from under me, plopping my ass flat in the barber seat. “If you're not busy darling...” she began to sing, namely about caring for one's mane... though I suppose I had hair but since I was in Equestria, hair on the head is called a mane, but manes are usually for horses...

She began slicing and dicing my hair while singing, stopping every so often to show me different hair styles. She sang about all different kinds of hair styles and even mustaches and beards.

At one point, she somehow managed to go from a short hairstyle, to a long straightened hairstyle where my hairline reached my shoulders. “WOAH! Okay, hold the phone... how'd you do that?” I asked, astonished and in a state of complete and utter disbelief.

As I broke her concentration, and the melody of her song, a magical aura around my hair disappeared and with it, my hair returned to the way it was before. “Do what darling?” she asked and I just shook my head.

“Uhh... never mind,” I replied, realizing now that she probably had some kind of hair spell going on. She continued her song where she left off. As she went on, I again stopped her as she transformed my facial hair into a Stalin-esque mustache. “WOAH!” I gasped, leaping up, getting close to the mirror and stroking my fingers through it.

“You like it darling?” she asked, intrigued by my fascination. It was so silky and smooth... and it looked pretty awesome. Though the thought of having a mustache that was made so infamous by such a crazed dictator, made me think twice.

“Yeah but uhh... I think I'll pass,” I replied and she put on a pouty face. I looked to Applejack who rose an eyebrow and I just sighed, standing up and removing the neck strip and cape. As I did so, my hair returned to it's former state. “Listen Rarity I...” I trailed off, trying to find the words to explain it. I bit my lip and looked back to Applejack. Our eyes met and as I looked into her bright green eyes, something clicked. A warm feeling passed through me, along with what felt like an embracing light flashing from her eyes to mine... I don't know what it was... but I just... I dunno, I felt calm and just had this need to tell the truth. I turned back to Rarity.

“I did it,” I replied bluntly and she just blinked, unsure of what I meant. “I was the one who wrecked your store and robbed you,” I said and at first she just laughed.

“Oh darling, don't say such things. It isn't really all that funny-” she cut herself short and came to a realization as she looked into my eyes, realizing I was telling the truth. Her eyes went wide and her teeth gritted down hard. I swear, for a moment, I almost saw steam coming from her ears.

“Why you... you... YOU FILTHY THIEF!” Her horn spouted out globs of energy and before I knew it, a glass vase was thrown at me. With lightning fast relfexes, I snagged the vase and rescued it from imminent demise. With my hands full however, a sewing machine clocked me square in the forehead, doing a number to my forehead and laying me flat. 'Wow! She's really got some bite.'

Applejack stood between us. “NOW HOLD YER HORSES RARITY! What in tarnation do yah think yer doin'?!” she boomed and Rarity's eyes squinted as she gave Applejack a glare and with that, the two stared each other down like a pair of desperadoes.

“You knew? Why am I even asking? Of course you knew! That's why you came with him! You're probably in on it, that's why you're defending him! And here I thought we were friends!” she screeched and Applejack stomped her hoof.

“Rarity, that's enough!” AJ yelled and Rarity's horn flared brilliantly.

I sat up, albiet staggeringly. “STOP THE FUCK UP!” I boomed, not piecing my words together and just yelling a random assortment of words to get their attention. The goose-egg on my forehead was well protruded and still hurt a bit.

I staggered to my feet and held my hands out defensively. “I can explain, just please... please Rarity, before you beat me to death... Applejack wasn't part of it, she just wants me to come clean and said she'd come with me just to make me feel a little bit calmer about the whole ordeal,” I said and Rarity wailed.

“Ordeal? ORDEAL?! What 'ordeal' could you have possibly been in that was worse than mine?! Coming back from Baltimare to find my home broken into, my finely woven, prize winning dresses ripped to shreds, and some of my finest suits and attire stolen! What could you possibly have gone through that could make doing that to me, a patron to society, justifiable?!” she yelled and I let out a deep exhale then removed my eye patch, showing off my faded and damaged eye.

“When you went to Baltimare to face Freeze... it was all over the news. At the time I was watching over Discord because... well... he was kind of a brat. Anyway; Lassie, Discord, Derreck and-” Rarity cut me short.

“Who's Derreck?” she asked interrogatively.

“He's... it doesn't really matter, he's a friend of mine and it's not really important. Well... actually he's the one that said we should get clothes from your shop-” she again cut me short.

“Then why in Equestria would you steal suits?! That's hardly winter wear, and why in Celestia's name... WOULD YOU DESTROY MY DRESSES?!” She screamed and I flinched.

“I'm getting to that, I swear... Okay..." I let out a sigh and continued. "So Derreck thought it would be a good idea to get clothes from you and said that if we didn't make it, then we really wouldn't have a debt to pay since Equestria would be screwed anyway. And... when your door turned out to be locked... that's when he blew it down with a shotgun... then he suggested we dress nice because it could be the last thing we ever wear... and Lassie... being a dunce... and partially because she's a dog... kinda ended up ripping a few of your dresses,” I informed her and she tensed up.

“YOUR DOG! You let your 'dog' wear some of my dresses!” she screamed and I flinched.

“Okay, Rarity! Ju-just... let me finish. So we dressed up all nice... figuring the world was probably gonna end anyway. So... we went to Baltimare then... Discord kinda betrayed us-” this time however, it was Applejack who interrupted.

“Figures. Ah knew that no-gooder couldn't be trusted,” she muttered and I just groaned.

“Because! Freeze..." I groaned and rubbed my forehead, trying to remember what the hell Discord had said about Freeze's spell. "Something about science and physics that probably don't make sense and... anyway, Lassie captured Discord and we convinced him to work with us then finally we beat Freeze... and along the way I lost my eye. It... something about physics again that I don't totally understand... and my hair also grayed when I nearly died,” I informed her then rubbed my face, taking notice that my forehead swelling was gone.

I looked to Rarity who was still pretty steamed. “I was going to tell you but... I wanted to pay you back also. I know what we did was wrong and... kind of stupid really. Suits and dresses for winter weather, but... well... I'm sorry Rarity. I was going to pay you back but... well, that's another long story. I fucked up... real big, and I know it doesn't take away what I did but... I am sorry,” I apologized and she calmed down slightly.

“Darling... I... Spike even helped me find gems to build new suits. And he didn't even have anything to do with it!” she shouted and I nodded.

“I know... I know alright. I was just... I don't know... scared I guess. I didn't know what to say, or what to do... Rarity, I'll try and make it up to you, I swear. Whether or not you forgive me... doesn't change the fact that I'm sorry and... fuck...” I trailed off and painful memories came back to haunt me. 'You're just a fuck-up, a fucking durr!'

I dropped to my knees, the world spinning around me. “I'm just a fuck up,” I muttered, losing faith in myself. I looked at the palms of my hands, then turned my hands over and looked to my scarred knuckles. When I got old, they'd probably have bad arthritis.

I heard AJ speak to Rarity. “Ah know as well as you do Rarity, that what he done was foolish, but at least he came clean about it. Heck, he was even gonna pay yah back when he got the money together. Ah just told him that he needed tah come clean about it before yah heard it from anypony else.” I looked up to see Rarity's expression gear down from anger and start to become a little more fond.

“I'll find a way to get the money I owe you... I don't know when, I don't know how but I'll-” I was cut off as Rarity put a hoof over my mouth, a gentle and warm smile across her face.

“You needn't say another thing darling.” She pulled me into a tight hug, which at first I didn't return due to the fact I was so shocked. “Oh, you're so brave and courageous darling," she chimed in an eccentric voice. She pulled back from the hug and look directly into my eyes. "Going all the way to Baltimare, fighting Freeze and besting her, all just to save little old me,” she chimed, bashing her eyes at me as she leaned a little closer, her warm breath pressing against my cheeks.

I sat there, still in her embrace and looking into her eyes. “Uhm... yeah... I guess... aren't you mad?” I asked but she shook her head.

“At you darling? Never,” she said and I cocked my eyebrow... 'Hadn't she just smoked me in the head a minute ago with a fricken sewing machine?' I thought to myself before my thoughts were interrupted by her voice. “Why, after finding out what you did for me... I'll be forever in your debt,” she said, still staring into my eyes with a luscious look. “Is there anyway I can repay you, 'anything' at all?” she said in a very... uhm... well, her tone was very strange and I wasn't really used to this tone from ponies, especially her.

“Well... I mean-” but I was cut off as she pressed her lips to mine, her eyes fluttering shut as she did this. My eyes cocked wide open in shock and disbelief, but I didn't exactly pull away. Instead, I sat their, embraced with Rarity as she kissed me... rather passionately at that.

Suddenly a pair of hooves yanked Rarity and I apart. “Rarity!” AJ yelled and I was put into a state of further confusion. 'What's going on?! One minute a mare is beating me with a sewing machine, the next she's kissing me, now AJ is yelling at her...' I thought, puzzled and unable to comprehend what was happening. It was just moving too fast for my liking.

AJ pulled me to my feet. “Rarity, ah'll speak with you later. Right now,” she looked to me. “You and ah gotta... uhm... got work on the farm that ah could use yer help with.” She began pulling me out the door and from the corner of my eye, I caught the sight of Rarity blushing deeply, with a timid smile that could only be topped by Fluttershy's natural timidness.

As Applejack pulled me down the street, I stopped in my tracks. “What the fu... what-just-happened?!” I asked, only now coming to mind of what just happened. Applejack rolled her eyes in a bemused way.

She said something under her breath that sounded like 'That's the reason ah came along,' but I wasn't certain. “Oh she's just... don't pay her no mind, she's just acting like a damsel in distress,” AJ pointed out and I nodded, snapping as it all made sense.

“Oh yeah! Like princesses that are locked away in castles, right?” I asked and AJ just groaned, saying something again under her breath, this time it sounded like 'Good thing yer dense as a brick.'

“Yeah... yeah, like a princess in a castle...” she trailed off and led me back to the farm. Looking around, I followed her gaze but it really just went from one thing to another as she rubbed her chin in thought. She finally turned back to me. “Uhh... yah can help Big Mac stack hay in the mow... ah gotta... go... out,” she told me then turned and began trotting back towards Ponyville.

I walked into the barn and saw Mac stacking hay up on the mow, just like Applejack said. “Hey Mac, need a hand?” I asked and he looked down to me, then to the hay and shook his head.

“Nnnnope,” he said in his general bland voice. I went cockeyed. AJ had just told me...

“Well... is it okay if I help you anyway?” I asked and he thought for a moment, smiled, and finally nodded.

“Eeeeyup.” It was all I needed to hear. I began tossing bales up to Mac and he proceeded to stacked them. We stacked hay for the entirety of the day, only ever stopping for water. After a long while, the evening sun began to set it's orange haze over the horizon and the day began to come to a close.

Big Mac let out a huff then turned to me and gave me a nudge to the side. He was taller than most ponies and managed to nudge me a little higher than most could. “Thanks fer the help... got a lot done tahday,” he thanked me and I just brushed it aside.

“Bah, no problem. AJ asked me to help anyway,” I replied and he just nodded then smiled.

“Wanna drink?” he asked and I rubbed my chin, smiled then replied in a similar fashion to him.

“Eeyup.” He just chuckled then led me towards the house. He set a small table on the porch, along with two chairs and sat me down.

“Ah'll be right back,” he said then proceeded into the house. I fiddled my fingers and waited. Soon enough, Mac returned with two foaming mugs full of... something. He set one down for me, and kept one for himself.

I picked up the glass mug and took notice that it was warm. “Uhm... what is it?” I asked and Mac just smiled.

“Some a last years apple cider, warmed it up fer yah too. Cider's usually the best warm,” he stated and I just swirled it around.

“I had cider once... kinda tasted like apple juice,” I told him then smiled. I took a sip, swigged it around in my mouth and swallowed. It was warm, and a little bit thicker than water or juice.

“Like it?” he asked and I nodded. “Taste like apple juice?” he asked but I shook my head. “Eeyup. Ol' family recipe. Seconded by none,” he said and I nodded.

“Indeed. It's pretty tasty,” I said, taking a larger chug. He nodded.

“Sometime, ah'll give yah some a the special brew... but not tahday,” he told me and I looked to him.

“Special brew?” I asked and he just smiled, patting me on the shoulder.

“Aged stuff, dun worry bout it,” he told me and I nodded as we sat like chums and drank cider. Not bad stuff really. Sweet, yet not too sweet, and the warmth made it a bit like really runny syrup.

As we finished up, we ended up sitting together and watching the sunset. As the orange haze glimmered down on us, I noticed his body had a fine physique and tone to it. “You're pretty strong Mac. You work out?” I asked curiously, wondering just how an earth pony would lift weights.

He blushed and timidly covered his blush with a hoof. “Uhm... well... ah work on the farm,” he replied with a peep. I nodded and gave him a pat to the shoulder.

“It really shows. You look good,” I told him and his face blushed an even deeper hue of red, which looked funny on his already red cheeks.

He nodded and squeaked back. “Uhm... you too... uhh... you work out?” he asked and I nodded.

“Haven't done a real workout in a long while. Was stuck up on a mountain,” I told him and he nodded. “Say...” I began and looked to him. “What's say a friendly arm wrestle, huh? Whatta yah say? Nothing seriously competitive, just friends,” I suggested and he rubbed the back of his mane.

“Uhm... well, uhh,” he stammered and I cluncked my arm up on the table, ready to go.

“Come, on. Two work buddies just playing around,” I offered and he rubbed his chin before shrugging and flopping his foreleg up on the table.

“Alright, ah guess,” he said. We put our palms together, or well... his hoof, and I wrapped my fingers around his hoof. “Alright... uhm... on three?” he offered and I nodded. “One... two... three,” as the last syllable left his lips, both our bodies tensed up, muscles expanding. Both our biceps flexed, showing off our toned physiques.

Viens bulged from under our skin, a testament to our raw strength. I heard Mac grunt and stared him right in the face. A few viens were protruding from his forehead as he struggled to best me, while I grunted also... a memory came to mind, flashing before my eyes.

'Dillon... you son-of-a-bitch,' Arnie said, followed by a loud clap that sounded as he and Carl Weathers locked hands. Soon enough it became apparent it was a battle for dominance, Arnie cracking a wise pun about 'CIA got you pushing to many pencils?'

I looked Mac dead in the eye and began to put him down, smirking and making it look like a breeze. I didn't make a pun, since we were just having a friendly competition, but I still wanted to crack that pun... maybe another time.

As I cranked his arm down to less than a thirty degree angle, he began to grunt. Victory was mine, there was no doubt. The only question that remained was how long he lasted. From my left side came a chimy young filly's voice. “Come on Mac, yah can do it!” Applebloom cheered.

Due to my damaged eye and the fact it was covered by an eye patch, I hadn't seen her watching. I looked over and saw her eyes wide as she watched her big brother, on the verge of defeat. Other than AJ, I could imagine that Mac was probably one of the most influential ponies in her life... someone she looked up to... somepony who she thought was the best.

'I can't beat Mac in front of her,' I thought to myself. Swallowing my pride, I eased up. All that I had gained on the farmer pony was slowly reversed, all the while, the cheering squeals of Applebloom chiming from beside me echoed off the porch.

After a few seconds Mac finally pinned my arm to the table. I let out a sigh, a small smile creeping across my lips. Applebloom cheered then looked to me. “It's okay. Yah might be strong, but Mac's won first prize in hoof wrestlin' four years straight, ain't that right big brother?” she chimed and Mac just blushed, shy about the topic.

“Eeyup,” he replied timidly.

Applebloom pulled a seat up to the table. “Can ah play a game with yah'll?” she asked cutely but I just sighed.

“Maybe another time sweetheart. I gotta get goin'. It's late, next time. Promise,” I promised and she motioned the Pinkie Promise. I followed suit and she smiled brightly. Mac looked to Applebloom.

“Uhh... Applebloom, can yah get us both a glass a water and a sandwich?” Mac asked, to which the young filly nodded and zoomed off with our empty glasses. He looked back to me. “Why'd yah do it?” he asked and I looked at him, knowing what he meant but deciding to ask anyway.

“Do what?” I asked and he just sighed.

“Yah know... let me win. Ah know yah could've beaten me... so why'd yah let me win?” he asked and I gave him a 'You know why' look.

“Oh come on Mac... I said before we started, just a playful competition, nothing serious. I know I could've won, but your young filly sister was watching. I know she looks up to you and... well, I didn't really need to win to prove anything so... I figured it might be hard for her to see her older brother lose... yah know?” I replied sincerely and he just smiled.

“Thanks, means a lot,” he said and I nodded just as Applebloom returned with the water and sandwiches, sliced in halves.

“Here yah go,” she offered and I took my glass then looked to the flower trough hanging off the porch. I gently poured the water onto the soil around the flowers.

“Here guys, drink up,” I muttered and Applebloom gasped.

“Yah wanted a glass a water just so yah could water the flowers?!” she gasped and I gave her mane a little tuffle.

“Yeah... everything deserves a bit of attention now and then. See yah'll around,” I said, grabbing two halves of a sandwich and with that I was off.

As I walked along the dusty trails, I again began to enjoy the little things in life. This world had a divine beauty about it that words can't describe. As I continued along, a little bird landed on my shoulder and sang a wonderful note.

I quietly whistled back, though my own vocals were pretty bad to say the least. Before I had time to think, Fluttershy bumped into me. “Oh my, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to... oh, Mr. Canary, there you are!” Fluttershy peeped and the bird fluttered off my shoulder and nestled into her mane.

“Hey Flutters,” I greeted her with a smile but she timidly looked away.

“Oh... hello... uhm... how are you? I-if... if you don't mind me asking?” she asked and I just chuckled to myself.

“Well... not bad I suppose. How's the animals?” I asked and she slowly turned her head back towards me but barely even made eye contact.

“Oh... they're fine. They're okay... uhm... I really must be going,” she said and scurried off. I watched her depart and felt a sinking feeling in my chest. I felt bad about how we first made our acquaintance, so to speak. First time I really spoke directly to her, I was telling her that I'd blow her guts all over the floor with my shotgun... but then again, the house was dark and I thought she was a home intruder.

I continued on home and finally arrived at library. I made my way inside but wasn't readily greeted by anyone. “Mom?” I called out but got no response. “Spike?” I asked, still no response. Lassie came mingling along, a Playcolt magazine in her paw... the Playcolt magazine that Cheerilee had given me.

“What's shakin?” Lassie asked and I just shrugged.

“Dunno. Wonderin' where everypony is,” I replied and she scratched the back of her neck before stuffing the magazine in-between the couch cushions. “Been masturbating?” I asked but she shook her head.

“Nah, just putting it somewhere where I'll remember,” she replied and I cocked an eyebrow.

“What if Spike found it?” I asked and she looked down at the crack between the cushions.

She pulled the magazine back out. “Yeah, I guess. Spike's out with Sweetiebelle and Twilight's running an errand.” I nodded.

“What about you?” I asked and she just yawned.

“Been cleaning up some things, just helping out... yah know?” she replied and I nodded. “So what are you up to?” she asked and I just shook my head.

“Don't know. Was gonna go for an afternoon drive. Wanna come along?” I asked but she just shook her head.

“No thanks. You'll need to get fuel though, she's almost out,” Lassie mentioned and I perked my eyebrow. “One tank's got some fuel but the other is low,” she told me and I just nodded.

“Okay, I'll be back. Be good,” I told her and she nodded.

“Aren't I always?” she asked coyly. I left the home and hopped into Cadence.

“Alright babe, let's go for an adventure,” I told my truck as I started her. I puttered my truck around, enjoying the sights of the town before finally leaving the town limits. As I reached the plains of Sweet Apple Acres, I flicked on the CD player in my truck and put in a disk. The tunes of Bad Company started playing as I drove around aimlessly.

As the day started to come to an end, I made my way to Flim and Flam's warehouse... at least I think it was their warehouse, maybe somepony else owned it and they just scammed them out of it. I pulled up to the fuel pump and shut off the truck, but left on the accessory setting of the ignition so I could listen to my music.

I popped both fuel caps and started pumping fuel. After a short time, I filled the rear tank and moved on to the front tank, humming the tune to the song that was playing from my radio. “Bad company... till the day I die.” I continued to bob my head to the beat but as I did, some metal clanging echoed from the warehouse.

I immediately turned to see what it was but saw nothing and simply brushed it off. “Bad company oh yeah-” I was cut off as more metal clanged, sounding as if it were falling from racks. I finished filling up the front tank, hung up the nozzle then turned off my truck, stuffing the keys up in the sun visor like usual.

I reached into the back seat and retrieved Belladonna, loading a magazine into the pistol. I thumbed the slide release and walked towards the warehouse. 'Probably nothing... just wild animals,' I assured myself, but even so I had this eerie hair prickling sense that something was wrong.

I entered the dark warehouse. “Hello?!” I called out. A presence whooshed through the shadows and I snapped my aim towards the general direction. “Stop screwing around... or I'll shoot!” I warned. The glowing engravings on Belladonna's slide illuminated and my senses went wild. Everything seemed to slow, the world around me beginning to send off more vibrant feelings.

I picked up the smell of... something rather awful... something that would be associated with sewers, like mice or rats. My vision did it's best to readjust to the darkness and my hearing sharpened.

Something in the back of my head told me to duck, and I did just that. As I ducked down, a piece of heavy rebar pole swung where my head had been just seconds ago, clashing into the wall beside me. I spun on my heels and drove my left fist into the perps stomach, expecting to find a pony.

Instead I was shocked to find some sort of... a rodent of unusual size. It was like a rat, but it stood on it's hindlegs. The punch winded the varmit and it staggered back. My senses cried out to me, warning me of a threat to my left side, my blind side due to my bad eye. I pivoted on my feet just in time to catch a piece of steel pipe being swung at me by another rodent. Jamming my pistol barrel into his gut, I fired several times, blood and gore spewing out his back side as I held his body close. Dropping the now deceased body, my combat senses told me to get out of the way.

I leapt forwards just as a bunch of scaffolding was overturned, crashing into the spot I had been prievously. I lined up a shot with the perpetrator and fired twice, the first shot knocking him back and the second rupturing his skull and spraying crimson against the wall. I noticed another baddie coming my way from my three o'clock. I turned and fired blindly but only got one shot. Even so, the sheer force Belladonna emitted was enough to knock him back and onto the floor, dead as dead gets.

The slide was racked back and locked... “Shit!” I cursed. Just as I stood up, another piece of rebar was swung at me. I grabbed the rat's arm and drove a fist into his stomach, but just as I did, another rebar pole clacked me in the temple, sending my world into darkness...

* * *

I slowly came to, my world in a fog, head spinning. “Ugh...” was all I managed. I tried to rub my sore forehead but couldn't even find the strength to move my hands. I was immobilized. As my head slowly dazed to and fro, a figure came into view, a big one.

He was wearing all black, but a white skull on the chest of his shirt shone like a glimmering light. He knelt down in front of me, his long jet black trench coat dangling onto the floor. “Der... Derreck,” I groaned and he just looked to me, his hazel eyes shimmering in the moon light.

“Smucked pretty hard?” he asked and I just tossed my head about wearily, unable to fully nod my head due to the daze I was in. “Must hurt,” he stated, like he didn't know. I didn't even bother trying to nod.

“Derreck,” I whispered, partial pain in my voice. He put his hand to my chin and lifted my head, putting us eye to eye.

“You're going to have to be strong... stronger than you've ever been before,” he said and I coughed violently, wheezing as if short for air. He shook me. “Stay with me!” he yelled. I again found the strength to look him in his good eye, his other damaged eye like mine and covered in an eyepatch.

“I know you're strong. Hell, just look at you. You're like Arnold fucking Schwarzenegger in Commando... but you've gone soft. You care... you love... you cherish...” he trailed off and gave me a dark look. “You have to forget about that right now... reach down, deep... find that inner hatred and embrace it... become stronger than you've ever been, because if you don't...” he stood up and stated walking back, still looking at me.

“Derreck,” I cried out, though a little silently due to my still drowsy state. He began to dissolve into the darkness, like a mist.

“I can't help you this time. You have to do it yourself,” he said, further fading into the darkness.

“Derreck!” I yelled.

“Embrace the inner beast... to rid yourself the pain of being man...”

* * *

I felt like I was drowning... head submerged and oxygen slowly burning away in my lungs as air bubbles drifted past the side of my face. Suddenly I was pulled up, but as the audible sound of splashing water entered my ears, so did a world of hurt.

My head throbbed. I felt like I had been hit by a freight train. A voice entered my world. “Hey, you in there?” The voice was distorted, probably due to my impaired state, and echoed in my mind. “Hero creature, you in there?” it asked before my head was dunked in water again.

I choked on the water, not expecting to be tortured like this. Water entered my lungs and began to drown me. Before I had time to think, my head was pulled back up, myself gagging and coughing up water.

As my vision came around, I was horrified that it did. In front of my face was a creepish rat thing. “Yeah... yeah you're still alive,” he laughed and I blinked, left side of my vision severely impaired as if I was still underwater.

I closed my left eye, realizing I didn't have my eyepatch on. The rat stepped back and forth, wielding Belladonna in his rat hands. God... he looked so weird... almost like a humam the way he stood and did things.

“You know...” he trailed off and handled a piece of rebar. “It's a real operation... a critical one at that, using this eight gauge stuff. An inch or two too high and...” he slowly tapped the rebar against the sore spot on my head. I winced and pulled away, only now noticing that I was sitting in a chair, my hands felt as if they were cable tied behind my back... but not to the chair itself. The cable that bound my hands felt like metal wire, not the usual plastic stuff.

He tossed the rebar aside then made about wielding Belladonna as if she were his own. “This thing... truly magnificent. It's heavy as a brick, but by the gods... you know, if the boss didn't want you alive, I'd have killed you already for what you did to my pals,” he told me, getting close. Ugh, his breath smelled horrid... rancid, like he hadn't ever brushed his teeth.

“So... I was wondering... how's this thing work?” he asked, pointing it at my forehead and pulling on the trigger several times as if it were still loaded. “I saw how you used it but... well... it doesn't work for me,” he replied and I just smirked.

“It's cause she doesn't like you,” I sneered but was answered with a pistol whip to the face. It hurt, a lot.

“Don't fuck with me. Boys!” he ordered, and two rats on each side of me began pummeling my gut with their fists. It wasn't bad at first, they were kind of weak, but after about two minutes, I began to wheeze as they knocked the wind out of me.

The one who was doing all the talking set my pistol down on a table while the other two held me down on the chair. I realized at this point I was in the warehouse still... at least I think I was in the warehouse. “Your dog friend... Canidae oh-six-seven... she's a real bitch,” he said. I looked to him with a raised eyebrow.

“Who?” I asked and he just groaned.

“Your stupid fucking dog!” he growled and I snickered, chuckling even. “What's so funny?” he snarled and I just smirked.

“Her name... is Lassie,” I told him sternly and he just rolled his eyes, groaning and letting off an annoyed sigh.

“Yeah... yeah okay. Lassie. Well... her real name, is Canidae oh-six-seven,” he replied and I curled my lip at him.

“Her name... is Lassie,” I growled and he just stifled a laugh.

“Oh... okay then,” he began in a coy voice, almost as if he were sorry. “Lassie, sorry to have mistaken her name,” he sarcastically apologized. He got in close to my face, his foul breath making me want to gag. “Who's at home right now... watching your little cunt?” he asked, the way he described my friend making my insides boil.

“Your princess friend?” he asked in a whimpering way, almost teasing me. “You got a marefriend watching her tonight?” he asked, still taunting me. “Or is she alllllll alone... with no one to tuck her in tonight and wead her a bedtime stowy,” he taunted me, putting a lisp into his voice.

My inner anger began to reach it's breaching point and I gave him a glare. He just laughed, getting in my face and cackling. I remembered Tristan... remembered the times my real mother had called me a fuck up... everything.

My neck tensed, veins protruding as I curled my lips back. “Oooh, is someone angwy?” he asked, still with that taunting lisp. I headbutted him in the snout, hard. Standing straight up, overpowering the two that were holding me down. As I reached my full height, I drove my boot into his ankle, busting it sideways with a satisfying CRUNCH!

I spun to my right, spotting a rat with a crowbar. I drove a kick into his groin, forcing him to his knees in pain. I cocked back my leg, making sure to balance myself, and drove my heel into his forehead, knocking him to his back.

A yell of anger came from the one who was taunting me at first. I looked as he reached out at me, still on the ground due to his busted ankle. I delivered a spin kick to the chest which launched him into the barrel of water they were trying to drown me with, water splashing all over the floor.

As my feet settled to balance my body, the other rat that had been holding me down swung a two-by-four at me. I turned my back to him and let the board painfull slam against my back. I groaned and drove my foot straight back, only hitting him with a light force but enough to stagger him for a moment and let me safely turn back around.

I backpedaled as the rat began swinging the board at me. Without the use of my hands, it was all I could do but to duck and dodge the swings. I ended up backing into some metal shelves just as he took another swing. I ducked and the board slammed where my head had been just moments ago.

I spun to the opposite side of shelving unit and body-checked it into the board wielding rat, toppling the shelves over his body. Looking to the work tables, I spotted a desk grinder. I backed up and felt for the on switch, quickly turning it on.

The rat I had kicked in the groin charged at me. Looking to the wall, I spotted a fire extinguisher and kicked it at him. He flinched and braced himself against the catapuling projectile, despite the small force behind it. It gave me enough time to grind off the cable ties and free my hands.

The rat charged me again. I drove a one-two punch to his gut before driving home an uppercut. He fell to his back just as the other rat came at me. He swung twice and I dodged each swing. He stepped back and readied for a swing with his right.

As he swung, I pinned his arm against a supporting beam, grabbed a screwdriver with my right hand and drove the screwdriver right through his forearm. He screamed in agonizing pain, staggering back and grasping at the protruding tool.

I reached across the desk and grabbed an old steel toolbox then swung it hard, clacking him in the side of the head and putting him out. I looked to the ground where the other rat was struggling to get to his feet. I walked over and drove a powerful kick right under his jaw, putting him out as well.

I let out a satisfied exhale then walked over to the table where Belladonna lay. I picked her up and looked at her. That disgusting rat's dirty prints were all over her. I looked around and grabbed a rag, doing my best to clean her up. I'd make note to thoroughly later. Looking to the table, I also found my eye patch and slipped it back on.

Holding Belladonna in just my right hand, I walked over to the rat who had done all the talking, who was still dragging himself on the ground. I knelt down in front of him, he looking up to me with disbelief in his eyes.

“You know... I am gonna go home and read my girl a bedtime story tonight,” I told him and he just inhaled, still in utter disbelief of what had happened. “And it's gonna end happily ever after,” I said before standing up and driving the base of my boot straight into his face. I made the motion as if to straighten a hat...

* * *

Third person, outside warehouse...

Kianna lay flat in the distance, having watched the events play before her through the use of high powered binoculars. She watched the man come out of the warehouse, dripping wet from the water torture he had endured. He still carried his heavy hand-cannon and slipped back into his truck.

Lowering her binoculars, Kianna rubbed her chin in thought. "What are you... GROM?" she asked and a voice spoke from beside her.

"What's a grom?" the stallion beside her asked. An M40A3 sniper rifle was mounted in front of him, supported by a bipod and sporting a high magnification scope along with the trigger guard being removed so he could us the rifle with ease.

"GROM, it's the Polish special forces from back on my world. They're the only military force that officially use that hand-cannon he's carrying... but by god it's so overwhelmingly useless," she stated and he looked to her with a curious expression.

"Useless... but... didn't you see what he did earlier?" he asked and she nodded.

"He could've just as easily done that with a Glock pistol, probably better since he wouldn't have run out of ammo... that gun is heavy, lots of recoil and sports a low magazine capacity" She looked through her binoculars, staring at the man. "Why use that gun?" she muttered to herself and the stallion peered through the scope of his rifle.

"Do you want me to take the shot?" he asked but she shook her head.

"Negative... he probably has bullet proof windows," she replied. "Patience. We'll get 'em... we'll get 'em..."

* * *

Later...

It was late when I got home, I must have been knocked out for quite some time.

I knelt down beside Lassie as she slept cozily in her dog bed. It was warm out tonight, so I didn't need to cover her with a blanket. Added to the fact she had long fur, she'd probably wake up sweating and panting. Instead I tucked a light bed sheet over her, gently stroking my hand across her cheek.

“You might act like an imp sometimes... a bit annoying at others... but I love you Lassie, and you'll always be my dog... till the end of times,” I said, a tear trickling down my cheek. I leaned over and gave her a kiss to the muzzle before standing up and making my way to my own bed.

As I tucked myself in, my conscious spoke up. 'I knew you could do it.'

“Do what?” I mumbled.

'I knew you could beat them. You might be going soft, but no matter how hard you try to put the past behind you... you'll always be you,' it said and I cocked my eyebrow.

“Huh?” I asked but it didn't answer me back. I just brushed it off as nothing and rolled over, snuggling into my blankets...

Chapter 41

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Chapter 42

'Love... it's a burning thing...'

I set a bookmark in the story and looked to my mother. “Sorry, forgot. I have to go put my laundry in the dryer.,” I told her as I set the book aside. We had been reading for the better part of two hours and I had forgotten about my laundry.

I stood up and proceeded to the door, grabbing my boots on the way out. “Don't be long,” she called out and I gave her a nod. I hopped into the driver seat of Cadence, starting her up and not bothering to talk dirty. Maybe later...

I cruised through town at a gentle pace. It was getting on in the day but the afternoon was still young. Cruising my way to the laundromat, I made the trip longer than it would regularly be.

As I finally reached the building, I parked Cadence but left her running as always. I wouldn't be that long. I stepped inside and noticed how hot it was in here. The closed space coupled with the big windows really amplified the sun's heat.

I felt a little light headed but nothing severe. I went over to my washing machine and grabbed the wet clothing then made quick work stuffing it in a dryer. I didn't have any fabric softeners so my clothes would be clung together with static when they came out. The warmth was so nice and relaxing... I just wanted to sit down for a moment.

I let out a sigh and pulled up a chair near the front window. I took a seat, taking note to make my rest quick since Cadence was still running. I looked out the window and watched the small town as it bustled along in its own way. The sun rays beat through the window and made me drowsy. Warmth against my skin prickled up the hair on my arm, as if flowers directing themselves towards the sunlight. I leaned my head back a bit, my body wobbling a bit from side to side.

My eyes flickered from time to time, and every so often my head would dip and I'd start to drowse off, but the ticking from the dryer would jolt me awake with a startle. I let out a long sigh and continued to watch the town. I had told Twi I'd be back soon but... my eyes slowly began to shut. The light started to fade in my vision as my head dipped downwards.

'Maybe... I'll just... only for a second...'

* * *

I jolted awake, the sunny skies now dark, gloomy and giving off an eerie feel. The clouds were dark gray and let no sunlight through. I shook my head but as I went to stand up, I took notice of something that made my heart sink.

The town... it... it was just... rubble. “Ugh... AH!” I gasped in disbelief. The chair beneath me gave out and I crashed to the floor. The legs had rusted away so much it could no longer support my weight. I looked and noticed all the washing machines were toast, rusted out and tattered.

I stood up and turned around, looking to the interior of the building as I staggered backwards. It was severely aged... looking like it had never been maintained in the last few decades. Parts of the ceiling had collapsed, littering the floor with rubble.

A pony's skeleton lay nearby. I gasped in frieght. “Oh Jesus... Jesus Christ...” I huffed in fright. “What... what the fuck happened?” I staggered back further but ended up tripping on the windowsill, the window pane itself being absent and its glass shattered all over the ground. I landed hard on my back, glass crunching under my weight and some of it digging into my skin.

I scurried to my feet, glass shards having cut my body in several places from my fall. I stepped through the rubble. Turning, I saw Cadence, in a pile of flames. “Ca... CADENCE!” I yelled, rushing over.

She suddenly erupted into a fiery explosion that blew me back, my body tumbling across the coarse and ruined road of Ponyville. I stood up and looked in disbelief. A glint of something shining caught my eye. I scrambled to my feet and rushed over until I was nearly above it.

I kicked away the nearby rubble to reveal Belladonna in her leg holster. I strapped the hand-cannon to my leg while looking around in disbelief. “What... how did... no... no way! No fucking way!” I shouted. This... it couldn't be... I wouldn't have just slept through this. How could it have...

A bustling wind blew past me. A shivering feeling encased my body. There was a presence nearby, I just knew it. I took a deep breath and spun around only to be faced by a figure in a dark cloak that covered the entirety of their body. “Uhmm... he-hey... uhh...” I was a little skeptical about who, or what, it was.

The very sight sent more shivers down my back. The figure reached up to its face with one of its forelegs, though no body parts of any sort extended from the confines of the cloak. Alas, only a dark fog emitted from the base of the figure while the cape seemed to seep into the very ground itself.

The hood was pulled back and I nearly yelped in shock as I was faced with a smog and set of dark green eyes that had devilish pupils. The eyes themselves set off a fog of purple. Just before I could go for my gun the shadowy smog faded away, leaving only the face of a rather handsome stallion.

He spoke in a very suave voice that eased my nerves. “Oh, I do apologize. I didn't mean to frighten you. My name is King Sombra, ruler of the lands... but you may call me Sombra... if it is in your interests,” he greeted and I let out a long exhale.

“Oh... phew... oh man for a second there I... never mind, thank sweet Celestia,” I mentioned with another deep exhale. He suddenly grunted, stiffening and stuttering to himself. I outreached my hand. “The name's Burdick... Evan Burdick... but yah can call me Burdy if yah fancy.”

“Ce... Celes...” he grunted in anguish. I cocked an eyebrow. “Celestia?!”

“Uh... no... Burdy,” I replied unsurely as I tapped my index fingers together. 'Sombra... where the hell have I heard that name before...'

He stepped back staggeringly. “CELESTIA?!” He roared as his eyes flashed red and green, purple smog emulating from them.

“Uhm... Sombra... or whatever you said your name was... dude, do like... need some water or something?” I asked but he instead roared out, his back hunching as he let out an anguished yell.

Without warning his body figure began to change, his snout became a wee bit stouter and his nostrils hunches up a bit, like a crocodile's. His horn warped into more of a curved look, now glowing dark red.

Horn glowing, he shouted out in another distraught roar, though now he sounded rather angry and pissed off. The roar was so powerful it blew me back, slamming me into a crumbled down house. Dust blew off the spot I had hit as my body cratered into the building.

Blood dripped down from some of my cuts along with what would be bruises later on. My skin was scuffed up real bad. I leaned my head back and my eyes went wide. He had gleaming teeth, his canines razor sharp and looking like a vampire's or something.

I kept a straight face and did my best. “Yer one ugly mother fucker.” His nose twitched a bit as he stared me down. Suddenly his eyebrows arched upwards and he let out an angered roar.

I stood up, wondering to myself about this. I quickly went for my gun but just as my hand reached the grips, his horn lit up and shot out a blast of energy that slammed me through the decrepit brick wall I had already hit once.

The rubble cluttered around me and I lost my pistol as it slid away from my grasp. I stood up and realized how close he was to me. I cocked back and swung hard, my fist connecting with what I thought was his head. Instead my knuckles collided with a metal helmet.

I stepped back, flicking my hand in minor pain. I looked to my fist, then to his metal helmet. “Bad idea,” I said plainly in an Arnie voice. He blasted me again with yet another blast, launching me through another brick wall.

I groaned in pain. “Of course... just my luck,” I muttered. Sombra stepped through the busted down wall, hissing and snarling.

“CELESTIA!” He boomed.

I stood up, putting on a straight face, while adding to it with my best Schwarzenegger accent. “Da name-” I cut myself off as I plowed him back through the hole in the wall with a staggeringly powerful haymaker. “-is Burdy!”

He stumbled back but found his footing on his hindlegs and was quickly back to the offensive. I found my own footing and we both connected punches with one another, clipping each other in the cheek. I suppose his hurt me more than I did him... since he had that damned helmet.

He stepped back on his hindlegs, with great finesse, and cocked back a leg before swinging it at me with great technique. I followed through with a similar kick and our shins connected. I let out a grunt of pain, having hit another piece of damned armor.

We continued to duke it out, slamming each other with powerful strikes. He suddenly leapt back, his horn flashing brilliantly as he blasted me again. I flew out a window, glass shattering as I tumbled back into the streets of the destroyed Ponyville.

It clicked... it must've been this guy that destroyed the town... it had to be. Though how I didn't wake up during his rampage is beyond me. My vision passed over that of small skeletons... colts... fillies... oh goddess...

I stood up and turned to face him, my face twisting into an angered frown. “For what you did to them... I will never forgive you,” I said coldly, fists clenching and arms cocked at my sides.

“CELESTIA!” He roared out and I rolled my eye.

“THAT'S ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY?! IN A MOMENT YOU'LL BE BEGGING FOR DEATH!” I roared, leaping at him with great speed. As I zoomed at him, I swung hard, plowing him with all my force. His body skidded back as he braced himself. I plowed a barrage of punches and kicks into his body with such fury, it was all he could do but stay on the defensive. I stepped back then immediately leapt forwards while swinging my momentum into a brutal roundhouse kick that connected with his ribs and sent him tumbling back.

He stood up and I rushed him, roaring like an animal. I collided our bodies, slamming him to the ground with brutal force. Before I could land a strike, he headbutted me, knocking me back. I spun my body on the ground and flung myself up, landing on my feet. I looked him dead in the eyes but as I did... I felt something... deep down... I went a little light headed and fell to my knees. My arms fell and dangled by my sides as my body refused to listen.

Without body control, I went limp and fell to my side. He stepped forwards, chuckling to himself. My eyes couldn't focus on anything and I felt my body... my soul itself, become pale. He stopped just a few feet away from me, a dark smile spread across his face.

Before he could do another thing, a blur of motion hammered him across the ground, skidding him away from me. In that moment, I snapped out of whatever illness had ensnared me.

A figure in black clad fatigues stood in front of me. The chorus to the Soviet March echoed quietly in my mind. Derreck stood between Sombra and myself, the glowing white skull on the center of his shirt gleaming.

Sombra stared at him with anger and disgust. His helmet had been cracked and now just barely kept itself together, parts of it dangling off. He stood up slowly, snarling to himself and slowly removed what was left of his helmet. A flowing black mane smoked off his head as if it were merely smog.

“Embrace thy inner beast... to rid thyself the pain of being man,” Derreck muttered, his fists clenching and muscles tensing up. Sombra scrapped his hoof across the ground, dust fluffing up. Derreck reached up and removed his eyepatch. His eye, like mine, heavily damaged and fogged.

However, in this instant, his eye sharpened, the color distorting to a dark blue. In that very moment, his pupil returned in a slanted fashion much like a cat's. The iris seemed to be sucking inwards like a black hole or something.

A dark fiery aura surrounded him. Hellish red flames surrounded my friend in a fury, along with static electricity. Soon enough however, the flames changed to blue. Derreck stepped forwards, the crackling of his electrifying aura ever present. “I... am Derreck Parker...” he looked Sombra dead in the eyes.

For a moment Sombra stared back but then took a step back. Derreck took another step forwards. “I am filled with imperfect morals... volatile viciousness, ruthlessness... I AM all your worst fears come true. I...”

SLLLOOOOK

He jammed a magazine into Belladonna. “Am...”

KA-CHING

He thumbed the slide release. “Your punishment-”

“ENOUGH!” Boomed a regal voice. Derreck and I turned, only to be nearly blinded by a flash of brilliant light. A figure began to step forwards as the light faded and finally, Celestia stepped into view.

With Derreck's attention to Celestia, Sombra lunged at him. With lightning reflexes, he spun and chopped at Sombra's neck with the side of his palm, knocking him to the ground with brutal force despite the seemingly effortless swing.

He left the sights of Belladonna trained of Sombra before turning back to Celestia. “Speak fast,” he said in a deep tone.

“You need not worry... for this is all just a dream,” she assured him as I stood to my feet.

“Sure feels real,” I grunted, stretching out my aching back. Celestia dipped her head and looked to Sombra who was struggling to get up.

“I assure you... it is but a dream.” Derreck looked to Sombra who was struggling to get up. Cocking back his foot, he booted the tip of his footwear into Sombra's chin, flipping him over and onto his back. “ENOUGH!” Celestia boomed before sighing.

Derreck cocked an eyebrow as Celestia spoke. “My sister... guides ponies in their sleep during the night. I have asked her many a time to guide you but she says... your dreams are like no other. Nothing she has ever seen or bared witness to before... and wishes not to partake in them,” Celestia said and Derreck rolled his eyes, his damaged eye returning to it's normal damaged state. He slid the eye patch back on, the strap becoming hidden in his thick grayed hair.

Celestia stepped forwards. “In the day, I can see ponies as they day dream, or in the uncommon chance like you... while they sleep and dream during the day,” she said, now looking to Sombra. “Though I feel... this is not your dream as much as it is mine... a reflection of the past...” a tear trickled down her cheek.

Derreck's nose scrunched up, probably a little agitated. He de-cocked Belladonna and handed her back to me. I stuffed her into her leg holster as Derreck looked at Celestia. She spoke first. “I will... deal with him... lawfully,” she said yet Derreck didn't give a body gesture of any kind.

“Do so as you will... just make sure it's adequate,” he said before turning to leave. “Or I'll be back.” With that he walked away, fading off and disappearing. My head drooped and I let out a sigh.

I heard Sombra grunting and turned to face him. As I did however, Celestia stuck out one of her forelegs to stop me. Her horn flared brilliantly and everything, even time itself, seemed to stop. However, her and I didn't. Tears continued to trickle out of her eyes. I scratched my head but my fingers ended up getting tangled with my eye patch strap.

I readjusted it perfectly and stroked my fingers through my grayed hair. “So... uhm... he's the bad guy... I think?” I asked and she just nodded while looking away.

“In this world,” she said quietly. I used my pinkie finger to rub the inside part of my ear.

“So... bad guy... buuuuut?” I asked in curiosity.

“I... it's personal,” she wept and I nodded with raised eyebrows.

“Affinity for the bad guys huh? I understand,” I replied and she turned to me.

“It's not li-” but I cut her off.

“I kinda like anti-heros too, but villains from movies always have a place in my heart, mostly Disney villains. Gaston... Clayton... oh man, Percival McLeach was nearly my all-time favourite movie villain, seconded only by the Terminator. McLeach was like an animal poacher right, and he had this wicked crazy double barrel pump action shotgun with a scope and this unreal half-track that had a totally duped up crane thing on the back and a gia...” I trailed off as I realized she was whimpering to herself, still crying.

“I-it's not the s-same,” she whimpered. I blinked, realizing this was some kind of emotional moment for her. I bit my lip.

“I-I-I'm sorry I... I got carried away... I guess our... uhm...” I sat down beside her and went to outreach my hand to her then pulled it back, making a fist and biting my lip. I opened the palm of my hand to reach out to her again but still ended up retracting my hand again. “So... uhm... he's bad but?” I asked.

“He is bad in this world... this timeline... but in another... I loved him...” she began to tell me about a mirror similar to the one I tried to use to get back home. And how in a different setting, this guy was really nice but then something about another her being bad and him absorbing the badness or something... unlike any long story I had heard thus far from the ponies... this one didn't end with a happily ever after... in fact it was kind of sad really.

I tapped my fingers together as she finished the story. “I see... well...” I swallowed deeply. Looking around to the town that was frozen in time, I took note about how it was in ruins. “I don't know love that well... hell, the love you're talking about... I don't even know it at all really... but I'll sympathize for you,” I said and she nodded. I rested my palm on the handle of Belladonna. “She might be a wee tad bit excessive for handling him... besides, it is just a dream right... no need to go to the extreme. But... ah never mind,” I scratched the back of my head and Celestia looked to me.

“Enough of that. I was supposed to talk with you about your problems, not for you to assure me with my own,” she said and I cocked an eyebrow.

“My problems... I ain't got problems... well... I mean my eye is screwed, but other than that... OH SHIT! CADENCE IS STILL RUNNING!” I yelled and she cocked her head to one side in misunderstanding.

“My niece is what?” she asked but I shook my head.

“No... Cadence... not the pony, the... my truck. This is a dream right? Well I left my truck running... oh well, not like she'll use much fuel just sitting there idling,” I replied and she rubbed the side of her face.

“Oh... I see... nevermind. I meant with your... odd parenting problem,” she replied but I just brushed it off.

“Nah. Ain't got one of those either. My mom's great,” I said and she nodded.

“That is exactly what I mean... I should've done this earlier but I entrusted my sister to do it... I suppose she had reason not to.” I blinked and just shrugged. “Twilight Sparkle, the one you consider you mother... is not,” she said and I just stood there.

“Uhm...” I trailed off.

“I came to confront you in a peaceful way about you... difficulties in accepting those terms,” she said and I just rose an eyebrow. “She is not truly your mother you know,” she said and I nodded.

“Well... of course she is,” I said back but she shook her head.

“But she truly isn't. How is it that she is nearly the same age, a different species and never gave birth to you... yet you think she is your mother?” she asked and I nodded.

“She is the one who took me in... gave me shelter... loved me when she really shouldn't have due to my... behavior... that's what a mother is. Someone who loves you no matter what. Because you're family... and that's what family does... like your niece right?” I asked and she was taken aback by the comment. “She's your niece right?” I asked and she nodded slowly. “And you love her like an aunt would?” I asked and she nodded. “Yet... she isn't related in blood, but you would defend that title to an end... am I correct,” I replied but she was astounded by my counter.

“Yes but... it's different between you and her. The love is-” but I cut her off.

“I know the love is different. The bond between mother and son goes far beyond that of niece and aunt,” I said, leaving out the fact I had sex with my mother... a shudder went down my back. No matter how much I enjoyed it, that was some serious taboo.

Celestia sighed. “Perhaps you should speak with her about her true feelings for you,” she said and I blinked.

“True feelings?” I asked and she nodded.

“How she feels about you,” she replied and I just nodded.

“Oh yeah, we've spoken about it before. And like I said. She loves me... like a mother is supposed to,” I said and she nodded.

“And what of your real mother... how did she love you?” she asked and my heart nearly skipped a beat as I went pale faced.

“S-s-sh-she... she loved me,” I stammered.

“Like a mother should?” she asked and my chest felt light. I had a shortness for breath. I chewed hard on the side of my mouth, trying to numb out the emotional pain with physical, trying to forget.

“Ah... I... she...” I couldn't put the words together. It hurt so much.

“I'm sorry... but this has dragged on long enough. I realize how hard it must be for you but... you need to realize it doesn't just hurt you. And you need to accept that she is not your mother,” she said and I was still trying to find the words to speak.

“But she is... I a-am...” I bit my lip, tears coming to my eyes.

“Whatever the problem with your real mother... you must confront it and come to terms with the truth, the real truth... no more hiding it,” she said and I tried to shelter myself.

“P-pl-lease... can we not?” I pleaded. She shook her head and stomped her hoof.

“Your real mother... your true mother... what was she like?” she asked sternly. “What is it she did to torment you so?” she asked. Painful words spoken to me echoed in my mind.

“No... please,” I cried out. She stepped forwards, placing a hoof on my shoulder as I sat on my knees.

“I'm sorry, but this must be done,” she assured me. Suddenly a blur of motion streaked past us. I felt Belladonna being tugged from her leg holster. Derreck skidded past us, sliding down beside Sombra's still body and pulling him up to his chest.

He pressed the side of the gun to his head as he held him like a hostage. “HE SAID STOP IT!” Derreck roared and Celestia went pale. Her breath was stuttered for a moment before she stomped her hoof.

“Enough of this! Let him go!” she yelled but Derreck shook his head.

“Nuh-uhh... nope. He asked you real nice like... please stop... but you kept fucking poking... so now I'm telling you..” Derreck pressed the gun harder into Sombra's skull. “Leave it be... you say it's what must be done? Well this must be done as well. He's killed too many innocents to just walk freely.”

Celestia curled her lips. “IT'S JUST A DREAM! He never did any of this!” She shouted and Derreck shrugged his shoulders.

“So then... I guess just like all their deaths... his too is just meaningless?” Derreck asked and Celestia bit her lip. “Now... one more fucking time... leave him be... or my friend here splatters this guy's fucking head all over the ruins he created,” Derreck snarled.

Celestia sighed and stepped back. “So be it,” she whispered. Derreck tossed Sombra's still frozen body aside and de-cocked Belladonna's hammer. He walked over and spun the pistol on his finger before stuffing her in my leg holster.

He turned to face Celestia. “He is delicate... don't you dare try to break him. The outcome might be worse than you think,” he told her darkly then walked off. Celestia blinked and watched him walk off before she started to cry.

I made my way to her side and embraced her in a hug. Celestia wept into my shoulder. “I'm sorry... who am I to judge when I myself am so flawed?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Nah... you're not really flawed,” I replied with a smile. She shook her head but I put my hand beneath her chin and rose her face. “Love is a strange thing. I don't understand it... not one bit... but the word itself doesn't mean anything. Saying you love someone is nothing... it's just a word. The connection is what is truly special,” I told her.

“So you do understand love?” she asked but I shook my head.

“I don't think I'll ever understand it. But I do know this... love is something that should never be tampered with, regardless of reason. Derreck shouldn't tamper with your love for...” I looked over to Sombra. “Him.” I turned back to her. “And you shouldn't question the love I have for my mother,” I told her.

I smiled and hugged her tightly. “Saying you love somepony means nothing... truly loving them and making that connection...” I trailed off, not needing to speak the words.

Celestia nodded. “I'm sorry... for this... I shouldn't have,” she said and I nodded.

“It's okay... nopony's perfect,” I told her. “I should know,” I said and a painful memory came to mind, painful words being spoken to me. I cringed and Celestia leaned back.

“Are you okay?” she asked and I nodded, shaking it off. The instrumental chorus to an old song began to play. I smiled.

“I think our time here is coming to an end...” I trailed off. Derreck's soft voice, a tone from him I don't here very often, began to sing. He wasn't good at singing.

“Company, always on the run...” he trailed off. Celestia turned to Sombra. “Destiny, is the rising sun.”

I rested my hand on Celestia's shoulder. “Go to him... it could be your last time like this,” I told her. Time seemed to return and Sombra struggled to get up.

Sombra turned to strike her but I grappled him into a hold. He snarled and grunted but was still weak from Derreck's strikes. Celestia nestled her cheek into his. “I'll always love you,” she whispered, tears flowing from her eyes. Derreck's voice continued to sing.

“The song he's singing is a good one...” I told her as time seemed to slow to a stop again. Celestia sniffled to herself. “I'm sorry... for what happened with him,” I said but she shook her head.

“Don't be... it wasn't your fault,” she replied. A buzzing chime began to echo in my mind. “I'm sorry... for what I tried to do,” she said and I just rolled my eye.

“Let's never speak of it again.” The buzzing chime began to overwhelm Derreck's voice.

“Oh, one more thing. You are coming to the Gala, yes?” she asked and I nodded. “Oh, splendid. I'll see you then,” she said and with that my world started to fade out...

* * *

I awoke rather drowsily. Derreck sat in front of me humming the tune to Bad Company. I shot up and immediately looked outside. Letting out a relieved sigh, I was grateful the world was as it should be.

“Pleasant dreams?” he asked and I rolled my eye with a 'You damn well know what happened' look. He had Trillium, the Mosin Nagant PU, in his hands as he ran a cleaning patch through her, probably just oiling the gun.

He looked to me as he tapped the scope. “What happened to the original one? This one's from an SVT-40,” he asked.

“The original broke. They gave me this as a replacement,” I said. Original Mosin PU scopes had a consistent tube diameter, whereas the SVT-40 PU scopes had a thicker rear end. He groaned.

“Uhh... how'd it break?” he asked and I shrugged.

“Screw inside broke along with the lens,” I said and he dipped his head.

“And why haven't you refurbished the stock yet?” he asked and I just shrugged. “Well... if you're not going to, I will. Anyway, see you later,” he said and with that he was off with the rifle. A buzzing chime caught my attention and I noticed my laundry was done.

I went over and began folding it. As I nearly finished, I reached my black shirt, the one that had the custom paint job done by Derreck. I nearly gasped and stuffed the shirt back into the dryer.

My eyes were wide. I quickly pulled the shirt back out and looked at it. My heart fluttered. I'd have said the paint washed off a bit, but my other clothes weren't discolored by what would've been soiled water. Some of the paint around the cross had washed off, and now, on the chest of my shirt, was a frightening white skull, though lacking the bottom jaw piece.

The teeth of the upper jaw looked a bit drippy, further evidence that maybe the paint had washed off. “Sweet Celestia...” I whispered. I quickly folded it up so the skull couldn't be seen and jammed it on the bottom of the pile. “Shit...” I quickly finished my laundry and headed out. My dream came back to me and what Celestia had said... everything.

“Bah...” I trailed off. “Twilight's my mom... she has to be,” I assured myself as I hopped back in Cadence. Though she had been running for an hour, it had barely made a dent in the fuel reserve.

I pulled away and headed back home. I made no detours and didn't go slow. The shirt thing just freaked me out too much to enjoy the town's sights. I brought Cadence to a halt in front of the library and shut her off, hiding the keys in the sun visor like always. I scurried in and nearly bumped into Twilight. “Guh!” I gasped, almost as if she had caught me hiding something... which I was kind of trying to do.

“Woah... are you alright? What's wrong? You looked worried,” she said but I gulped and swallowed hard.

“Sorry... I... I passed out at the laundromat,” I apologized, dodging the subject.

“Oh sweetie, that's nothing to get worked up about. Now, go put on a shirt and we'll continue reading... actually...” she trailed off and rubbed a hoof up my side. “Maybe... stay like this. I kind of like it,” she said.

“Uhh... uh, yeah of course. Just let me... get my clothes downstairs, err... uhm, put my clothes downstairs,” I stammered and she smiled. I rushed downstairs and quickly put away my laundry but kept out the skull shirt.

“Oh shit... oh shit oh shit ohshitohshitohshit... SHIT!” I hissed under my breath. “How the hell could this have happened?!” I gasped and kept looking at the damned shirt. “Shit... huh... kinda looks like The Punisher... ack! Dammit this is creepy... what am I going to do?!” I whispered to myself.

I wish I had've know about this before Derreck left. I'd have gotten him to take the damned shirt with him. I bit my lip and decided perhaps to hide it under my bed mattress. I did just that and let out a relieved sigh.

I sat down on the side of my bed for a moment and stroked my face, rubbing it attentively and closing my eye. I was starting to feel a wee bit peckish. With a quiet exhale through my nose, I puttered my way back up the stairs and to the kitchen.

I began rummaging through the fridge but... I had the oddest sense of... misdirection. I had no idea what I wanted, and felt rather lost. I scratched the top of my head in thought. “Hmm... let's...” I grabbed the jam and some milk.

Shutting the fridge, I went over to the cupboards, retrieving the peanut butter and a coffee cup. “And...” I went and grabbed a loaf of bread, setting all of the items on the counter. I swiftly made myself a triple-decker peanut butter and jam sandwich, plus a cup of milk. In moments I stuffed it down, licking up the peanut butter trails on the sides of my lips.

Clucking my tongue, I had a craving for another. Quickly slopping myself up another one, I heard my mother's voice from upstairs. “Evan...” she called in a sultry like voice. I quickly chomped down on the man sized sandwich... next time I'd have to try four layers. I put everything away and poured myself another cup of milk to help with the stickiness the peanut butter had caused in my throat.

As I walked up the stairs, I sipped the cup of milk. As I reached her room, I found her lying on the bed, her rump towards me and some kind of fluffy saddle on her back. “Care for a ride on this pony?” she asked with a cheeky look.

“Uhh... well,” I took another sip of my milk. “I'm kind of heavy,” I replied and she dropped her head into a pillow with a groan.

“No... ugh... I meant... do you want to ride me?” she asked with a most peculiar tone. I clucked my tongue around my lips, tasting traces of peanut butter on the sides of my lips and some on my cheeks.

“Hmm... I'm not sure,” I replied and she cocked an eyebrow. “I might hurt you. I am pretty heavy and... no offense, but you don't exactly look like your fit to be a riding horse,” I said and she let out another groan then hopped off the bed.

Trotting over to me, she put a very memorizing sway in her hips. As she finally reached me, she turned around and wiggled her rump. “Come on honey... I can take it,” she said and I blinked.

“Uhm... okay...” I trailed off unsurely then stepped over her and very gently set my body weight down on her. She let out a yelp of shock as she was pinned beneath my weight.

“What are you doing?!” she gasped and I just blinked.

“Uhm... riding you?” I asked. She groaned.

“Well... at least you didn't just flop all your weight on me at once,” she sighed with relief as I stood back up and let her out from underneath me. She stood up to her hindlegs and pulled me tight. “Now think hard... really... hard.” Her horn lit up and my belt was flung off. My pants fell to my ankles. “You don't need these, know what I'm saying?” she asked and I thought to myself...

* * *

I swung through the jungle on vines, wearing nothing but a little rag to cover my private region. I swung off the vine and did several flips before landing on a thick tree branch. I reached out and grabbed a bunch of bananas. I peeled one open and ate it with a primal look on my face.

As I finished the banana, I stood up and beat my chest with my fists while letting out a Tarzan like howl...

* * *

I blinked as the thought faded away. “Yeeeaaaahhhh... probably not,” I muttered to myself. Twilight stood to her hind legs and licked at my cheeks.

“Mmm... you taste good,” she said as she began to lead me downstairs, kissing my cheeks, nipping at my neck, and licking at the peanut butter around my lips. As she continued leading me, I realized we were going to the basement.

“Uhh... where are we...” I trailed off, knowing full well where we were going, just not why.

“Spike or Lassie are bound to come home soon... I don't have a door to my room, let alone a wall,” she said, shutting the basement door and locking it behind us.

As we made our way down the stairs, I lost my footing and we both tumbled down the remaining steps, myself landing first and Twilight atop of me. “Mmm...” was all I groaned out. "Definitely don't need pants for that." Twilight sighed from atop of me.

“Are you okay?” she asked and I just nodded, my face still buried in the unforgivingly hard floor. “That... was unexpected,” she mentioned and I just sighed. I stood up along with her but didn't get much time as she ended up pulling me over to the bed.

She sat me down and nestled her cheek up to my rigid man boobs. “Mmm... you're so strong... and powerful...” she laid me down, sliding herself atop of me and grinding against my body in a very sexual demeanor. With that my arousal started to come around. She caressed my biceps to which I twitched a little, my muscles tensing up.

She noticed my erection and giggled. “Oooh... someone's in the mood.” Her horn lit up and with that, my boxers also came off. I bit my lip figuring she'd do something but instead she turned around and reared her rump up to me, flicking her tail up and out of the way. “So how bout it... you sure you don't know whether or not you want to ride me?” she asked and it clicked.

“OHHHH! Like...” I trailed off, sitting up and nearing my hips to hers. “Like...” I placed my arms at her sides and mounted her from behind. As the tip of my erection pressed to her wet folds, her back arched, pressing her soft fur into my stomach. The feeling was so immense I couldn't help but to let out a gasp of intense pleasure.

I slowly slid the first few inches of my shaft into her, my back leg stiffening up and threatening to cramp. My mother moaned beneath me, pushing her hips back and taking the rest of my length inside of her.

Her horn lit up and the radio Spike had given me for Hearth's Warming began to play. The tunes to Neil Young began to play and I looked to my mother. “Nei... ahh... Neil Yo-ahh-ounge... isn't exahhh... exactly sensual music...” I trailed off as we slowly pivoted our hips together, back and forth and meeting each other half way with each thrust.

“Sho-oooh-uld I chaaaange it?” she moaned but I shook my head.

“Too late...” I whispered in her ear as I rocked myself into her with a bit more power, "I'm in the mood." I felt her rear end clench up, trying to pull me in deeper with each thrust. “I like it this way,” I said and she giggled as she reared her rump a bit higher, letting me seemingly penetrate even deeper into her soaking pussy.

She began to huff after a few minutes and her thrusts back at me became a little more erratic as her squeals of pleasure became a higher pitch and echoed off the walls. I kept thrusting her but soon found she wasn't thrusting back. I looked and saw her eyes were closed, heavy blush across her cheeks and tongue lolled out.

Her front legs gave out and she fell face first into a pillow as she moaned wildly. “M-mom?” I asked but she just moaned out a response.

“Keep... AHHH!” she screamed out and I blinked, stopping for a moment. “Don... stoaahhhh!” she moaned. I stayed stationary for another moment before obliging to her request and started to rut her again.

I thrusted her like a wild beast, huffing into her mane and from time to time giving her ear a little nibble. She squealed like a filly... ech! Bad image. She squealed like a mare in heat getting rutted silly... yeah... “Oh yeah!” I moaned out.

Her insides tightened around me and I felt an oozing liquid seep out past my balls that were slapping against her clitoris with each thrust. She howled out a sensual moan of climax as she pressed her rump firmly against me. I stopped for a moment and buried myself inside of her, letting her insides try to milk me.

After a moment, she let out a sigh of relief. “That was wonderful... but maybe now it's my turn to make you feel good too,” she said. She slid out from beneath me and pushed me to my back. “Now... I'm gonna ride you like the stud you are,” she said and I rose a brow.

“Stud?” I asked and she nodded but didn't say anything as she straddled herself atop of me. Without much warning, she plummeted my cock inside of her. I arched myself into her and she cooed delightful things as she rode atop of me.

I tried my best to match a rhythm but found in the end it was just better to lay there and take it. I looked downwards and saw her sweet, wet, pussy slopping up and down on my hard rod. I huffed and moaned in pleasure as I watched her small pony breasts bounce up and down with each of her movements. The feeling of her inside muscles rubbing against me was incredible. It felt like there was minimal friction yet at the same time she was hugging me so tightly.

My hands reached to her hips and I began to guide her movements. She gave her rump a wiggle, driving herself down and hard before sliding herself back up. She drove herself down again but ground herself against me, whining pleasurably. I gave her flank a little smack, just enough to get a little jiggle out of it.

She smiled. “Mmm... wow... this feels... aaahhhh,” she moaned, already nearing her next climax. She began to straddle herself again. “Buck me... buck me like the wild stallion you are...” I did as she pleased and began to thrust myself at her like a bucking bronco.

She let out wild screams of ecstasy that aided to the sensual connection. As she continued to get louder and louder, she rocked against me harder and harder. He mane swished around and he wings fluttered erratically.

As she reached yet another orgasmic state, her eyes rolled into the back of her head, her back arching forwards. Though despite how well she had rode me, at this point was when she fell off, spasming in climax.

I rolled to my side and held her close. She squirmed against me, her tongue rolling out of her mouth as she sighed in pleasure, still riding out her orgasm. For a few minutes I just held her, relishing in the moment.

As she finally returned she sighed into my chest, nestling her muzzle into the space between my breasts. “Mmm... oh my... sweet Celestia that was good... but you're still not satisfied,” she mentioned but I just shrugged.

“It's always satisfying to be with you,” I whispered back and she giggled.

“Ohh... you're sooo sweet,” she kissed me then pulled back. “Okay... but seriously. Let's make you feel as good as I did... or at least somewhere close... wow, I'm still shaking,” she said under her breath.

Laying back, she gave a very inviting posture, spreading her legs wide in a most alluring way. I positioned myself atop of her, her magic taking hold of my erection and lining it up with her entrance. Slowly rocking my hips forwards, I penetrated her with ease.

I felt every inch of her wet succulent pussy envelope me, hugging me tight and not wanting to let me leave. I began to rock myself back and forth, picking up a nice rhythm and sticking with it.

“Oh goddess... you... mom, you feel so good,” I whispered and she nodded.

“Mmm... give it to me... harder... deeper,” she whined and I obliged with utter loyalty to her request. The song My, My, Hey, Hey began to play and I sighed.

“Man... this is so depressing,” I muttered and she giggled.

“Sorry... I guess I have a poor choice of music...” she giggled but I just shook my head.

“Good music just... not really fitting for the setting.” I kept rocking my hips into her, feeling her insides squelch against my movements. Having been going at it for... however long we had been doing this, I started to feel that ever sensual tingling in the base of my cock.

“Oh... oh goddess... mom I'm...” I trailed off and she wrapped her hindlegs around my back.

“Mmm... do it honey... fill mommy up... fill her with your seed...” she whimpered through a moan. I kept up the pace and felt the feeling getting stronger and stronger.

I began to huff, figuring I had reached my point, but instead the feeling just kept getting stronger and stronger. “Ugh... ooh...” I kept huffing as my cock went rigid and started twitching but I hadn't came yet. “Ugh... m-mo-mom!” I moaned.

“OH GODDESS YES... CUM INSIDE ME!” She wailed. I looked into her eyes and as our stares met, I erupted inside her. The first spurt was so powerful it nearly rattled my body. My back tensed and I jerked forwards, plunging myself into her depths as I unloaded my sticky cum inside of her. Her legs tightened around my back, keeping me close to her.

A second load plastered her insides, albeit not as powerful or potent as the first wave. I continued to grunt and moan as my cock kept twitching inside of her. After several moments, the feeling ended. I let out a sigh of pleasure and flopped down beside her. My cock slipped out of her dripping pussy and I slowly started to become soft.

Twilight snuggled into me and I slowly started to doze off. The smell in here was intoxicating and we were rather indecent but... the door was locked so we didn't have to worry about Spike seeing us like this...

* * *

I felt my leg being shook. “HEY, WAKE UP, WAKEUPWAKEUPWAKEUP! HURRY!” I jolted awake, my heart pounding in my chest. Twilight awoke beside me, gasping awake with shock just like me.

Lassie looked me right in the face. “Hurry, get dressed, we gotta go!” she announced and my alertness kicked into high gear as all my motor functions hit overdrive.

I slid out of bed. “What's wrong?!” I gasped and Lassie just stopped and stood there.

“Well... nothing's really wrong it's just... okay you know that place Franchini's?” she asked and I nodded. “Okay, so tonight they're having oriental night. Problem is they won't let me in-” I cut her off with a snicker.

“Yeah cause we got banned from there. I don't know if you remember, you were just a pup, but we got kicked out cause I snuck you in... actually, it might've been because Dash and I had a burping contest.” She blinked.

“Cool! I don't really remember that but... anyway, yeah! They won't let me in. Not cause we were banned but cause they said I was a dog! A DOG! Can you believe that?!” she gasped and both Twilight and I snickered. “What?!” she asked.

“You are... a dog though,” I said and she rolled her eyes.

“No! I'm a famous person's dog! I get special treatment, like those seeing eye dogs!” she announced and I just chuckled. “I'M SERIOUS! Celestia would be allowed to bring her stupid bird there! And besides, I know Princess Twilight Sparkle!” she announced like a spoiled little kid not getting her way.

My stomach rumbled. “Oh... oh man...” I imagined some oriental food... rice... chow mein... some really nice stir fry... “We're going to Franchini's,” I announced and Twilight just blinked then shook her head.

“But we can't. We were kicked out,” she said and I smirked.

“I'm famous now, and you're princess... I doubt they'll kick us out,” I said and she groaned, muttering to herself about how this couldn't possibly end well. I stopped for a moment, realizing I was exposed and Lassie had saw us in an indecent way. “Hey! How'd you get in? We locked the door,” I asked and Lassie brought up a key ring. “Ugh...”

“Now come on, before the place is filled with other ritzy ponies!” Lassie whined.

I waved her to calm down and made my way to the dresser. I flipped through some clothes and picked out a nice pair of jeans and a V-neck shirt along with fresh underwear and socks. Slipping on everything, I also put on my holy necklace, watch and eye patch. I gave the other two a nod but Twilight stopped.

“If you get your truck running, I'll be out in a moment... I need to clean up,” she said to which I nodded and sped out of the house with Lassie. I hopped in the truck and rubbed my hands together.

“Mmm... Cadence... you up to it?” I asked, stroking the steering wheel. “Ooh... you've been sooo naughty,” I said as Lassie jittered beside me.

“Come on man... we can't miss this!” she squealed and I turned to her.

“Calm down... easy girl. We still have to wait for Twilight...” I turned back to Cadence. “Which gives us more time, isn't that right?” I said, nestling my nose into the frontal pad of the steering wheel. “Mmm... oh your such a naughty girl... oh, oh what's that? Oh...” I swiped the naughty key, the sensor emitting a beep. “Oh... you want me to put it inside of you... oh-ho-ho... oh you're such a naughty girl.”

I slid the key around the entrance to the ignition, as if teasing her. Finally I slid the key and activated the glow plugs before finally turning her on. Lassie patted one of her paws on my shoulder. “I have to say... you're one of the most messed up ponies... person, I know,” she informed me and I smiled.

After a few more minutes, Twilight came hurrying out, hopping into the passenger seat and shutting the door. With that, I pulled off, hurrying along but not at a dangerous pace. I rummaged around under the center console without looking. “Now... where did I... ah!” I announced to myself as I pulled out my wallet. I drove towards the restaurant, just puttering along.

It took me a few minutes since I didn't quite remember where it was, but Lassie's constant directions did help, even if they were annoying at times. We finally reached the restaurant and I pulled around back, parking the truck and hiding the keys where I always did.

We approached the front and the smell of fine cuisine entered my nose. “Oh man... oh man I am so hungry!” I exclaimed to myself. We reached the check in the the attendant immediately looked to Lassie.

“Excusez-moi, no pets allowed,” he said in a rather annoying, uptight, Frenchy accent.

“Woah... hold the phone... she ain't no pet. She's Lassie,” I said but he simply cocked an eyebrow. “She's my friend. I'm... you know... Burdick... the guy who climbed Mount Tia... and this here is the newly crowned Princess Twilight Sparkle,” I said, introducing the three of us. Twilight just blushed and did her best to conceal the fact she was shy about the subject.

The attendant just blinked in an unimpressed way. But before he could say another word, a rather plump stallion pushed him right out of the way. His hair was slicked back and he had a classic looking Italian mustache. “Please, excuse his-a rudeness. He new,” he said in a perfect stereotypical accent.

“Follow me, I have a perfect-a window for you all,” he said, leading us to a table. His accent nearly made me drop to my knees and burst into laughter. It was too perfect. He led us to a table and sat us down.

Ponies stared at us and some began talking to themselves, looking over their shoulders every so often to get a glimpse at us. I realized we weren't exactly dressed nice like all of them...

The Italian stallion returned with some menus and gave us each one, even Lassie. “Whenever you're-a ready... I cook it up nice and-a fresh just-a for you,” he said. I quickly skimmed through it. All of it looked so good... but that was probably my stomach doing most of the thinking. I began pointing to random things, not bothering to try and pronounce the names. Most of it was rice based, but some was sushi. For desert I ordered something that looked like ice cream with cookie chunks.

Lassie ordered the same for the most part, a large order. Twilight took a moment then spoke her order. “May I please have some Chow mein, with a glass of water... thank you.” The guy finished writing it all down.

“Whatta ah owe yah?” I asked but he shook his head.

“Nothing... how you say... on the house?” he asked, and my eyes went wide. That was... a lot of food, and the price would been well into a thousand at least... more than that considering this place put a huge hole in my wallet the first time I went here.

“R-really?! W-wow... thanks,” I gasped but he shook his head.

“No, thank-a you. And-a call me... Franchini,” he said, shaking my hand. I was stunned, and was left slack jawed as he trotted away.

“Wow!” both Lassie and I gasped at the same time. I just met the fricken owner!... I think.

Twilight groaned. “Evan... just... please don't let it get to your head,” she pleaded and I looked to her.

“W-what? I just met the fricken owner! How cool is that! And besides, didn't you want me meeting new ponies and making friends?” I said to her excitedly, though in a hushed tone.

She shook her head. “No, I didn't mean it like that. I mean this fame thing. Please, just whatever you do, don't let it go to your head, okay?” she pleaded and I just brushed it off.

“Oh come on. You know that won't happen. I don't even like being the victim of media coverage anyway... but oh man, I met the owner!” I hushed the last part to myself. It took a while, but Franchini returned with our meal, even before others that had ordered ahead of us had even been served. It seemed a little unfair but that thought was quickly pushed to the back of my head as the lingering aroma of cuisine hit my nostrils.

“Thanks F,” I gave him my thanks to which he nodded. Before I had even turned around, Lassie had already begun devouring her food. My eyes went wide. In the chow mein I had ordered, there was shrimp.

'HOLY SHIT YES!' I screamed inwardly. I remembered what Dash had said about fish... I just didn't put two and two together and realize shrimp would be a delicacy in some places due to the fact it was technically fish. Unfortunately steak, pork, and bacon wouldn't be on the menu but I wouldn't start complaining.

Twilight just sighed. “I wish they wouldn't make such a fuss over us,” she muttered. I reached my hand across the table, placing it over her hoof, and gave her a wink.

“Just this one time?” I asked and she sighed. Slowly, she began to eat her food with elegant grace. I had seen her eat regularly and this was out of fashion for her... but it quickly clued in to me that we were in classy place. I did my best to eat properly as well, but it proved difficult with chopsticks. 'Since when do Italian restaurants have oriental nights?' I thought silently while downing some stir fry.

The evening past on, and the night slowly encased the world. As we finished our meal, Franchini arrived with our deserts we had ordered. Well, Twilight hadn't gotten anything but Lassie and I had.

I looked at what I had thought was ice cream from the picture, only to realize it was yogurt with granola. “Ugh-huh-ha-ha... oh jeeze,” I laughed and Twilight looked to me.

“Something wrong?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Not really... just thought it was ice cream from the picture,” I said and Twilight gave me a stupid look.

“Didn't you read the title?” she asked but I shook my head, to which she sighed.

“Want some?” I asked. She thought for a moment then smiled.

“Only if you feed it to me,” she chimed and I smiled.

“Alright princess,” I chuckled back to which she blushed. Lassie just groaned.

“Hopeless romantics,” she muttered while stuffing down some kinda cake looking thing. I took a sponeful of yogurt and flicked it at her. It splattered against her ear and side of her head. She gasped and turned to me but I was already looking away, a spoonful of yogurt ready for Twilight. We both held straight faces.

“Hey!” she hissed. “I know that was you... now, I'm not gonna get kicked out for having a food fight with you, but I'm not letting this go to waste either... lick it off me,” she whispered and I looked at her with a puzzled look. “That's your punishment for hitting me with yogurt. Lick it off me or I'll wipe it into your shirt...” she challenged.

I groaned and she looked inquisitively at me. “Well... you shouldn't have tossed that yogurt at me now should you? You think I'll stoop to your level?” she teased in a playful voice. "Cause you know I will and we'll all be kicked out of here." I sighed and leaned over, licking the yogurt of her fur and ears. As I licked it off the tip of her ear, it flickered about, gently slapping me from time to time.

Lassie shook her head. “Mmm... much better,” she said in a delighted voice then started stuffing more food down her gullet. I swear... that dog has like ADHD or something

I took a spoonful and fed it to my mother who mouthed it around. “Mmm... pretty good,” she appraised the taste, to which I took a spoonful. I wasn't a huge yogurt fan... but it was pretty damn good. Maybe a bit too sweet for vanilla flavor but it was still good, and the granola added a bit different yet welcomed taste.

We sat for a while and shared the yogurt until finally it was time to go. The place had really died down and I think it was close to closing time. I stood up but as I did, Franchini rushed over with a camera pony behind him. “Can I get a picture?” he asked and I shrugged.

“Well sure... it's the least I could do after what you've done for me,” I said. He pulled Twilight to one side of me, stepped beside me, then had Lassie rushed to his side. He faced the camera and outreached his hoof for me to shake. I shook his hoof and the camera flashed several times.

He gave me a wide smile and with that he was off, and so were we. Heading back to the truck, I looked up to the sky. The moon wasn't very visible tonight, but the stars were out in full force. I sighed as I hopped into the truck with the others and started her up. The fog lamps illuminated the darkness and gave me a full range of view out the windshield.

As we puttered back home, I sighed to myself. Twilight rested her hoof on my free hand. “Evan... I'm sorry for complaining earlier. I shouldn't have... it's always wonderful to spend time with you. I just wish that they wouldn't make a fuss over us just because I'm a princess and you're... well, you know,” she said and I nodded.

“It's okay... I understand.” I replied. Lassie squirmed up over the center console.

“Say, can we spend the night out in the pastures? It's really nice out there tonight,” she asked.

“Well... what about Spike?” I asked and she just shrugged.

“There's food in the fridge. He knows what to do,” she replied. I bit my lip. Looking to Twilight, she just shrugged.

“He has been on his own before. We could if you want,” she offered. I smiled. It sounded pleasant actually. A night under the stars with no worries. I puttered the truck into the pasture fields just outside the town and shut her down. We stepped out, the grassy field weaving to and fro in the gentle and warm wind. The pastures seemed to go on forever in the darkness.

The grass was halfway up my thighs, and soft to the tough. Despite being late, it was still warm out. I popped the tailgate on the truck and lay in the back. The plastic bedliner was far from comfortable but Lassie soon came out with the blanket for the back.

We placed it underneath us and all lay on it. I snuggled into Twilight While Lassie curled up at the bottom of our feet/hooves. I sighed as I rested my head against her chest. “I love you mum,” I whispered and she stroked my hair. We lay there under the stars, the world barely illuminated by what little light the moon reflected... or maybe in this world the moon actually gave off light... I wasn't sure. I sighed as my world started to fade out. My mother kissed my forehead.

“I love you... son.”

Author's Note

So, good story about work today... and kinda makes me look like a dork. Had to break this plywood board in half so I booted it in half. Now... the top half swung up and slapped me in the leg. It didn't hurt but it felt a bit different then just getting slapped by a piece of wood so I thought nothing of it. But as I started walking away the fricken board was like stuck to my leg and I was like "What the fuck..." so I tried shaking it off but it but it was just stuck there. So I tried flicking it off but it was at that moment I realized there were nails that had stuck into the sides of my calves and I was like "Ohhhhh... that makes sense" so I pulled it off my leg and continued working... now I'm thinking "Shit... I probably need a tetanus shot...

Chapter 43

'No way, no needles...'

Monday, June 23rd, 2014...

I lay dozing peacefully. Warm air breezed across my exposed skin. My right arm numb from my head laying on it. I felt little... somethings... they felt like feelers, brushing against my body with a gentle bliss.

Laying with the right side of my face in the ground, I slowly opened my left eye, only to be met by a complete blur. I closed my eyes and let out a sigh as I rolled over, my numb arm dragging itself along and refusing to respond.

I let my right eye crack half open, only to realize I was surrounded by tall field grass that brushed against my body with the gentle breeze. I tried to move my right arm but it just ended up flopping around, still not enough blood flowing through it to have it function properly.

I shifted around in the dirt and used my left hand to stroke my face, only to realize my hand was covered in... dust of some sort. Like I had been sanding something recently. I squinted my eye and looked closer, now noticing little black marks, like leftover paint that I hadn't washed off. I thought for a little while but couldn't remember doing any sort of renovating work or any kind of painting whatsoever.

A tingling feeling surged through my arm and I began clenching my fist and flexing my bicep. After a few more moments, my arm's primary functions had returned. I began rubbing my face, letting out sighs of morning drowse, light yawns, the usual.

After a few minutes, I realized that I was, or had been, sleeping in a field and not the back of my truck like I vaguely remembered. “Hmm... maybe I rolled out last night...” I muttered, figuring perhaps I had been squirming in my sleep and had fallen out.

With an exhale through my nose, I sat up. Doing a quick scan of the area, I quickly spotted my truck, only a few yards away. “Ahh... perfect,” I whispered under my breath. Standing up, I noticed that my feet were bare, boots and socks missing.

I went to scratch the side of my head then noticed I was also missing my t-shirt. The only garment of clothing I had left was my underwear. “Uhm... at least I left myself decent...” I whispered in uncertainty.

I just shrugged and moseyed over to the truck. Just a few feet behind her rear, I found my socks and boots, but no shirt.

I smirked to myself. “I find my boots, my socks, but I need a sheet,” I said in an Italian accent, still a little bit drowsy. “Go to the toilet. No, I wanna sheet on the bed,” I chuckled as I slipped on my socks and pants. On the tailgate, I also found my custom gadget watch and eye patch. My necklace had stayed on all night.

I slipped the watch on first, fastening it to my wrist, then the eye patch. I sat down on the tailgate and just looked to the wide open pastures. It was nice out here. Quiet, gentle... away from everything. A flashing memory invaded my vision and played back a moment I would always remember.

Twizzler, my favorite cow, grazing out in the hay field past the electric fence... where she wasn't supposed to be. I whistled out and called her name. Her head darted up and her ears flickered and clapped together. She looked to me then trotted down in a prancing way. As she arrived to the fence, she kept a steady pace and simply hopped over it like it was nothing.

The memory faded and my vision returned to normal. I looked to my hands and recalled that for some reason, I had black paint or something on them along with some granular dust.

As I sat there in peace, Lassie slowly woke from her slumber and sat up, then without another word hopped over the side of the bed box. After a moment, I heard a trickling sound. I peered over the side of the truck and saw her taking a leak on my truck tire.

“HEY! What gives?” I asked and she looked to me.

“What gives yourself? Is it like... some kinda fetish you have? Watching me pee,” she asked and I frowned, sitting back down and leaving her to her privacy. After a few more moments, she paced back to the rear of the truck and hopped back into the box.

“So seriously... why the tire?” I asked and she just shrugged.

“Dunno. Never gave it much thought. It just seemed... like the natural thing to do really... like... like a subconscious thing. Like breathing,” she stated and I rose an eyebrow. “What?! Don't believe me? It's like me asking you why you stand while taking a leak,” she replied and I just rolled my eye.

Our commotion had awoken Twilight. She gave a whinny yawn and wrapped her forelegs around my waist. “Mmm... what happened to your shirt?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Dunno. Woke up face down in the dirt over there nearly naked...” I trailed off, wondering what exactly did happen. I laid my hands atop her hooves as we just sat there together. Lassie's wagging tail thumped against the bed-liner as she sat beside us.

“Know what I'm thinking?” she asked but we both shook our heads.

I spoke up. “No... but I have a feeling you're gonna tell us,” I replied. She nodded then rubbed her belly.

“What's say... take out for breakfast. I'm thinking... Tim Horseton's?” she suggested. As she mentioned the idea of food, my stomach gave a low growl. I wasn't starved, but I could go for some chow.

“Mmm... that sounds pretty good actually... couple grilled cheese, egg bagel...” we both looked to Twilight and she gave us a blank expression.

“What? Why are you two looking at me like that?” she asked curiously.

I held up my hands in wondering way. “Well... how's bout it? Breakfast of Champions... err... well, breakfast of Canadians, or whatever you call them here?” I asked.

“Oh... well I was going to-” she was cut off as Lassie barked.

“YUPP! TIM HORSETON'S, LET'S GO!” she announced without another word. She zipped out of the back and to the passenger side. Twilight just blinked and I turned to her with a smirk.

“She sure is somethin huh?” I chuckled as we both hopped out of the box. I shut the tailgate and helped the two of them into the passenger side, even though I was willing to bet Twilight could do it herself.

I walked around and took my place in the driver seat. “Mmm... good morning Cadence. Have a nice nap?” I asked as I swiped the naughty key. As always, she pipped out a beep. I keyed the glow plugs and let out a yawn.

Lassie leaned over. “So... what happens if you try to start the truck before that light goes out?” she asked. I rubbed my chin.

“Uhh... well... if it's cold out... it'd be hard on the starter... in warm weather... I dunno. Not really a mechanic,” I replied as I keyed the ignition. Cadence rumbled to life with no problems and I quickly pulled away. As we drove, there was a... silence. Not an awkward one, or an eerie one... just a silence. “So...?” I asked. They both looked to me.

Lassie spoke first. “So what?” she asked and I just shook my head with a shrug.

“Sooo... what's been going on lately?” I asked, trying to spark up a conversation... and failing misreably.

They both just looked to themselves and scratched behind their ears in similar fashion, though Twilight used her forehoof and Lassie her hind paw. Twilight spoke up. “My birthday is coming up... I guess.”

“Ahh... yes, of course. So what did you want again?” I asked but she just giggled.

“Nothing really. I said that already. I just want you to be there,” she said with a smile. Lassie leaned over and whispered into my ear, using her paw to cover the view of her mouth.

“That's her way of saying get her something she'd like,” she joked and I gave a frown. Twilight buried her face into her hoof.

“That's not my way of saying get me something I'd... nevermind,” she said. I tapped my fingers together in wonder.

“So... if you were to want something... it'd be a...” I trailed off and waited for her to finish but she just shook her head.

“I don't want anything. Don't worry yourself about it,” she replied. Lassie leaned forwards over the center console and waved.

“Hey, if she won't take it, I'll take whatever it is,” she said with a mischievous grin. I patted her head and scratched behind her ears.

“I'll make note of that,” I laughed then rubbed under her chin attentively. As we puttered along, the silence returned. 'Figures...' I thought to myself. After a few minutes, I was pulling the truck up in front of the Tim Horseton's. 'And no drive-thru...' I muttered inwardly.

I turned off Cadence and pocketed the keys, along with my wallet. We all proceeded inside, where the ever friendly cashier mare, Mary, met us with a friendly smile. As we stepped up, she looked to Twilight, then to me, then back to Twilight and finally to me. “Oh... I never knew you had a marefriend,” she said and my stomach sank.

“N-Uhh... no I... I'm her... she's my son... erm... I'm her son... she's my mom,” I stammered out, not wanting her to get the wrong idea. She blinked, looked at Twilight then back to me again.

“Uhh... she's... you're mom?” she asked hesitantly and Twilight spoke up.

“In relative terms,” she said. I had no idea what that meant and I don't think Mary did either. She just nodded just as I did, unsurely.

“Oh... I see... well then... so how may I help you this morning?” she asked. Lassie hopped her front paws on the counter.

“Cappuccino with whip cream, and two grilled cheese... please,” Lassie ordered. Mary just nodded. My mother stepped up to order next.

“Uhm... may I have... a hay sandwich and a cup of tea, please?” she asked and Mary typed it in. I rubbed my chin.

“Can I get... a powder jelly doughnut, two grilled cheese sandwiches and-” Lassie cut me off.

“Let me guess... large tea with honey flavor and a lemon wedge with a little umbrella?” she asked, partly ordering for me. I just blinked. That did sound pretty good. I looked to Mary who was looking to me, waiting for me to give the okay.

I nodded and Lassie snickered. “Hipster,” she chuckled and I looked to her with a frown.

“Shush you,” I whispered. Mary typed it in and got several things wrong but I didn't bother telling her as I promptly paid for the overcharged bill. Lassie and I waited for the bill as Twilight found a spot for all of us to sit together by a window.

Mary soon returned with our food along with the receipt then went pale faced. “Oh no... oh dear... ohdearohdearohdear... I... I...” she stammered nervously and I grabbed the bill.

“Overcharged me? It's okay, I owe you from when you paid for my coffee that time, remember?” I said with a wink, though it probably just looked like a blink due to me only having one eye. She let out a heavily relieved sigh. Lassie hopped up and grabbed our order.

“Alright! Chow time,” she said happily, tail wagging wildly. Mary rose a brow.

“Never get used to it... a talking dog,” she said and I gave Lassie a rub to the side of her face.

“Yeah, but she's a good talking dog,” I said and Lassie looked over.

“Yeah... and you forgot best friend,” she joked and I just chuckled.

“Yeah... that's Lassie, my best friend...” I pointed over my shoulder with my thumb. “That's Twilight, my pony mother,” I said, as if joking about my own words.

Lassie just snorked. “Jesus... you really need a psychiatrist,” she joked and I nodded, my head swaying side to side.

“Yeah... probably... though they'd end up just stuffing me in a straight jacket,” I joked back. I looked to Mary and gave her a nod as I raised my tea. “Thanks,” I thanked her and proceeded to our seat.

I sat down but as I did, Lassie started hoovering down her grilled cheese. I cradled my tea... my hipster tea as Lassie would call it, and looked to my mother. She met my stare and blushed, looking away timidly. “What?” she asked bashfully.

“Nothing,” I replied, elbows on the table and holding my cup up high, swishing it around and blowing on it in an attempt to cool it faster. “So...” I trailed off and she looked to me.

“So...?” she asked back.

“Your birthday... excited?” I asked and she shrugged in uncertainty.

“I'm not sure,” she replied. I rose an eyebrow.

“Not sure?” I asked and she smirked.

“Well how bout you? Are you excited for your birthday?” she asked and I just scratched my head.

“Truth be told... I wasn't really thinking about it. Figured I'd just let it pass by without anypony knowing,” I said but Lassie just snorked.

“HA! Not-a-chance. I already got you a present,” she informed me and I rose a brow. “And NOOO, I'm not gonna tell you what it is. It'll ruin the surprise,” she stated and my mother looked to me.

“She's right. Can't let it pass by unnoticed. Besides, I've gotten you something too. Can't let it just pass by,” she insisted and I just sighed.

Lassie spoke up. “Besides, 19 is a big year,” she informed me and I looked to her. I had no idea what the legal drinking age or anything was in Equestria, not that I cared. Usually the big year referred to legal drinking age.

“How is it a big year?” I asked and she gave me a dumb look.

“Duh, last year of being a teenager. Last year you can be immature and get away with it. Last year you don't have to take responsibility seriously. Last year-” I cut her off.

“Okay-okay... alright. But first things first. Mom, your birthday...” I trailed off and she just squirmed in her seat with a blush.

“I don't know... I'm not really positive. Last year it was pretty fun...” she told me the story about how last year Rarity had went out on a business trip or something to Canterlot and how she wouldn't make it back for Twilight's party so the group went to Canterlot and... it was quite a conundrum.

“Ha-ha... Rarity, playing double agent...” I snickered and Twilight looked to me with a cocked brow. “Nothing... just snickering to myself is all... okay, so how about the birthday before that?” I asked and she just sighed.

“Oh... it was nothing special really...” she trailed off. Both Lassie and I looked to her and waited. “What? I said it was nothing,” she stated but we still waited with persistence. “Well... I got some gifts in the mail from my family and a new study book from Celestia... and I just... studied...” she said, rather sheepishly.

“Okay... the one before that?” I asked. She just looked away.

“I... wasn't very social...” she trailed off and I just sighed.

“Sorry,” I replied but she just turned back and gave a smile.

“It's alright. How about you?” she asked. I just covered my face and stroked it.

“I uhh... was working my last birthday... at the farm back home,” I stated.

“And the time bef-” Lassie cut her off.

“Nah, it's good Twilight. Just a bunch of useless nostalgic memories,” she interrupted abruptly.

I nodded. “Yeah... pretty useless...” I said with a deep tone. Twilight went to say something but Lassie motioned for her to say nothing. “It's alright Lassie... mom, I... I was pretty young when I last had a birthday party... with friends and stuff...” I trailed off, cutting myself short before I got too deep into it.

“Oh... I see... well, I'll make sure that this year you'll have a fantastic...” she trailed off and looked around. I tried to follow her gaze but it was mostly just to random places. “I'll make sure that you have a fantastic party-” she was cut off by a blast of confetti that sprayed at us.

“PARTYYYYY,” screamed an ever hyperactive voice as Pinkie bounced around, popping out of nowhere. She began to sing a song about birthdays and parties and all kinds of nonsense. As the song came to a close, she placed a party hat on my head and stuffed a party horn in my mouth before leaping into the garbage can nearby.

I gave a little toot with the horn before spitting it out and taking off the hat. I looked to the garbage can and lifted the lid, only to find it vacant. “The fu...” I trailed off. I went and took my seat once again, only to find Lassie stuffing back some of my grilled cheese. “EH!” I gasped and yanked away the second sandwich.

“Wha?” she asked before swallowing. “It didn't look like you were eating it.” I frowned and turned to Mary.

“Hey Mary. Can I get a few more grilled cheese sandwiches?” I asked. She gave me a nod and I turned back to Twilight. “Dog...” I muttered and Lassie nudged me.

“Best friend,” she commented and I rolled my eye.

“So... how about your birthday mom? What can I get you?” I asked and she just shrugged.

“Nothing. Really. It's okay.” I frowned but she just padded me on the shoulder. “Enough about that. You have to do something else today,” she said and I cocked my eyebrow. “Have you forgotten already. You have a dentist appointment,” she giggled and I snapped.

“Oh yeah... that's right,” I said and she continued to smile.

“In both of your haste, you forgot to get her address. Here, I circle her house for you,” she gave me a map of Ponyville. Her house was on the other side of town. Just as I was looking at the map, Mary came by with my grilled cheese sandwiches.

I paid the bill, plus extra for a tip. I went to set them down and saw Lassie had eaten my other sandwich. “Aww... Lassie,” I groaned and she stopped, giving me a look as her cheeks were stuffed outwards like a chipmunk.

I snatched my jelly doughnut and took a bite, powder dabbing the sides of my lips. I relaxed for a while... and only ended up getting one grilled cheese sandwich... but it was nice. Relaxing for a change. My life had finally started to settle down. I didn't have the throttle pinned to the floor... I was just idling along... 'Maybe this is what it's like to live like a normal person,' I thought to myself, 'As normal as can be for the only human in a pony world...'

After a little while, I stood up and we proceeded to leave. “I'll drop you guys off and then head to the dentist,” I told them. We hopped in the truck and before starting it, I placed my half empty tea in the cup holder.

I started the truck and headed home. Unfortunately, like the ride to Tim Horseton's, there wasn't much conversation. Instead, I just had my tasty tea to entertain myself. I pulled the truck up to the front of the library and turned to my mother. I leaned over and gave her a smooch. “See yah in a bit,” I gave my farewell for the time. Lassie leaned over.

“Hey... what about me? Don't I get a kiss too?” she asked like a pouty kid. I just snicked and went to give her a kiss on the cheek. Instead she leaned in and began to slobber me with kisses.

“ACK! Lassie!” I laughed as I tried to pull away, only for her to lean in more and lick all the underside of my neck and chin. Without warning, she stopped abruptly.

“Okay, toodles,” she gave her goodbye and hopped out, along with Twilight who shut the door behind them. I slipped the truck into reverse and turned my boat of a truck around before slipping the transmission into drive and pulling away.

I drove to the outskirts of town and drove around in circles. I put a CD into the player, letting the tunes of Bon Jovi play, and cranking the music louder than the big block engine that was rumbling along at an idle pace.

An old memory of the truck's former owner played in my mind. 'I like her... but you can't have a conversation in the truck while it's running. Hell, you can't even order at the drive-thru.'

I laughed to myself. Oh how true that was, let alone if I could even manage to get my truck into a drive-thru without curbing it. I rolled the window down and rested my left arm while driving with my right. I began to mouth the words to 'Dead or Alive' as it played. A fume of dust followed my truck as I paced along beneath Celestia's beating sun.

Eventually I pulled around to Minuette's. I parked the truck and shut her down, hiding my keys in the visor like always. I put my wallet in my back pocket and paced up to the door. I gave a brief knock but never got a reply.

I knocked again but still got no reply. “Huh... wouldn't that be shitty... go to the dentist an-” the door swung open and startled me.

“Sorry, sorry. I was just doing a bit of studying. Come in-come in,” she greeted. I nodded and made my way inside. She led me over to a door and opened it, revealing a set of stairs to a basement room. “My office is downstairs, hope you don't mind?” she asked but I shook my head.

“I live in a basement...” I chuckled and stepped downstairs. As I reached the bottom, a shiver went down my spine. It was a little cool down here. I saw that she had a little table with some dentistry equipment and one of those patient bed things. Despite a basement operation, it looked like a regular dentist place. Not to shabby.

I walked up to the patient bed and looked back to her. “Sooo... I guess I just lay down on this thing huh?” I asked. She nodded.

“Uhm... yeah, sure. If it makes you comfortable. I just need to get a few things ready first,” she stated. I laid down and stared straight up and into that big light thing they always had above your head.

She came to my side with a fabric mask on and a few tools levitating beside her head, coated in her magic aura. “Okay... just... uhm, open up and saw ahhh.” I did as she asked. She began to explore my mouth with a popsicle stick and tiny mirror thing.

“Yeck... you don't floss much do you?” she asked and I tried to reply but it came out garbled. I just shook my head. She brought down some other things and began screwing around in my mouth. Pretty soon a tiny grinder looking thing came down and buzzed on. “Okay... this won't hurt. Or at least, it shouldn't hurt, okay?” she asked and I nodded.

She began to buzz at my teeth. It didn't hurt, but rather it just vibrated my head lightly. The back of my throat began to fill with saliva and I gagged slightly. “Oh, right... here suck on this,” she said and stuffed some rod in my mouth. I closed my mouth and sucked, and the saliva was sucked out.

I clucked my mouth and she promptly continued. Suddenly there was a sharp pain. “GAH!” I gasped and she yelped.

“Oh goddess. I'm so sorry. It slipped,” she apologized in a hurry.

“Ah! What was that?” I gasped as the taste of blood entered my mouth.

“I hit you gum by accident. I'm sooo sorry, please forgive me!” she pleaded and I just nodded.

“It's fine... I don't think I'll die... heh-heh... ouch,” I laughed and she rose a brow.

“Y-you-you're not mad?” she asked hesitantly and I just shook my head.

“Nah... it's alright. Everyone makes a mistake or an accident every now and then. Just as long as you don't keep jabbing me...” I gave her a smile... which was probably kind of bloody. She sucked away at my mouth with the little vacuum thingy then continued her work.

She flossed my teeth, and scrubbed them and did all sorts of things. “Okay... uhm... like I said before... your bottom teeth are a bit bent but I don't think you could do braces...” she trailed off and looked deep inside my mouth.

“Can you just... one second...” she grabbed some things then returned. She put my head in some kinda box thing that only had three walls. Suddenly her horn flashed like a camera and she removed the box.

I was a little confused by what was happening but pretty soon I got my answer. She returned with an x-ray sheet. “Okay... your one wisdom tooth... here,” she said, pointing to one of my wisdom teeth that appeared crooked. “Is growing on an angle... have you noticed any pain lately?” she asked but I just shook my head.

“Uhm... not in my mouth,” I replied and she just bit her lip.

“Well... I'm not absolutely positive but I'm pretty sure that it'll start to chew away at your gums and cause some severe discomfort as it continues to grow. If you're okay with it... I'd like to remove it before it causes you pain,” she replied. I blinked.

“What kinds of pain?” I asked.

“Well... the list is pretty long but mostly just pains when eating or similar activities,” she replied. I clucked my tongue. Pains while eating sounded pretty bad.

“Oh man... that sounds pretty bad,” I replied and she nodded.

“So... do you want me to remove the tooth?” she asked and I nodded.

“I guess...” I replied. She levitated out a gauze pad and a needle, floating it towards me. I gasped and swatted at the needle. “GAH! No way man,” I said in fear. She was stunned by the gesture.

“Uhm...” she trailed off as she retrieved the needle. “What's wrong?” she asked but I shook my head.

“No needle doc, I don't do needles,” I replied and she swallowed.

“B-but... it's an analgesic... you need it to numb the pain or...” she trailed off. I waved it off, breathing heavily.

“Just... just no needles... please... okay, please... no needles,” I pleaded with her. Her mouth was slightly agape.

“But... oh wait... so... is it just needles you have a problem with?” she asked and I nodded. “What if I cast a spell?” she asked and I nodded.

“Sure... just no needle okay.” I controlled my breathing and lowered my heart rate. She stepped back and lowered her horn.

“Okay... if I'm doing this right...” she trailed off and her horn flashed briefly. With that she pulled out a nasty hook looking thing and a wee little scalpel knife. She moved them towards my mouth. “You're... afraid of needles but not a hook and knife going into your mouth?” she asked and I nodded. “And... you barely know me, and I'm not really a dentist yet... you trust me to do this?”

I nodded. “You seem to know what you're talking about... and besides, you seem like a nice gal,” I replied and she smiled.

“Okay... first time for everything right?” she asked, and I just figured she meant somepony she barely knew trusting her to do this. She touched my gums with the knife and I flinched.

“Ahh... I can still feel it,” I replied. She bit her lip.

“Sorry... maybe there wasn't enough potency in my spell...” she trailed off and flashed her horn again. She poked my mouth. “Anything?” and I nodded. Her horn flared again. Again she poked me and still I felt the slight pain. “Still?” she asked. She sucked in deeply and quickly let out a large exhale.

“Okay... here it goes,” she lowered her horn right to my face and clenched her eyes shut as her horn began to brighten intensely. Spurts of magic globed off her horn and were absorbed into my skin, making me feel funny.

Suddenly there was a blinding light and a sudden force that struck my head. My eye was temporarily blinded and I had to keep it shut for a moment before opening it again. I was a little dazed from the strike. Minuette looked to me.

“Are you feeling okay?” she asked and her voice started off fine but became a little muffled at the end.

“Yeah. Yeah I think so... I just...” Something felt really different. “I'mmm feelings juss... find...” my vision began to blur a bit and my voice started to slur and get deeper. “Uhhh... my eye... icey... ooh... I see...” I trailed off, unable to piece together words.

Everything started to move around. The walls looked like they were turning to jelly or something. I looked to her and saw that despite everything else shape shifting, she was the same for the most part. I noticed that her mane... it kinda... I tried to sit up but couldn't manage and just ended up struggling around.

She leaned down to help me and I got my chance. I reached up and felt her mane. Her mane... it felt all velvety and... it was all squishy and goopy. “Uh-ha-ha.” My voice was really deep and garbled. “Yer man... it feel mike... tooth pasta-ha-ha-ha...” I laughed as I leaned in to put my face in her mane.

I ended up falling over and off the patient bed. At first I expected to hit the ground but instead my body fell right through the floor and exploded into a spray of soap bubbles. My clothes turned into butterflies and flew away while my watch turned into a giant clock tower and my necklace turned into the arms for the clock.

The bubbles that were my body all swarmed together and formed the shape of a body but still stayed separate. As I fell, some bubbles streamed off my body, like a slip stream, but my bubble body never shrunk in size despite all the bubbles flying off. I was surrounded by a creepy ass town that seemed like it was from some kinda Halloween horror film. It was all dark and creepy, with spiders and bugs crawling all over the place. Creepy little... things that looks kinda like gremlins hopped around and sang a tune. A snake slithered by me then leapt down a hole in the ground. I suddenly realized there were two holes right next to each other that turned into eyes.

I felt myself tossed off as a massive creature stood up. I had been standing on it's face. I landed on the ground and splattered but my bubble body reformed. I walked along a barren desert... or wasteland. There was no sand. Just a freakishly feeling ground that was squishy.

My bubble body staggered around as I tried to walk. Suddenly a pointy spike popped one of the bubbles in my face, and a bunch of heart symbols spewed out. “Ahh... my bubbles... bubbles... my bubbles,” I moaned as I dropped and flailed around.

The spike kept popping bubbles and more hearts flew out of me. “Nah... no more hearts... NO MORE HEARTS!” I screamed as the hearts made a puddle beneath me and I fell through the ground. A creepy vulture looking beast with long dangly arms flew after me, its mouth stretching unrealistically wide. I screamed but my body was swallowed into its depths.

Creepy tentacles swarms in my vision as all the bubbles disappeared and I was left with my body... kind of. My body had turned into what looked like Play-Doh. One tentacle vein looking thing squiggled towards me and into my mouth. “BAHHH!” I yelled out and suddenly gushes of red dough stuff squirted out of my mouth along with my dough head being pulled off my body.

My head was rolled away and down some kind of smooth runway. Suddenly my head collided with some bowling pins, resulting in a Strike. The sound of bowling pins being knocked over boomed like thunder.

My head fell into the dark abyss behind the pins and continued to fall. As I fell, a dark light shone and lit everything up. Belladonna swung into view, being held by no one. The gun's slide racked back, then was released and the trigger was pulled. There was no audible gunshot but the slide blew back as a club symbol erupted out the front of the gun and a Spade projected out the barrel.

My body returned though it was just a black two dimensional form. I rolled to a crouched position and Belladonna flew to my hands. A red pony figure, also two dimensional, came into view. A set of two black eyes flashed along with a black fog, and out of its non existent mouth, spat a hail of icy cold cards.

The cards splashed against the left side of my face and froze it rigid. My hands were already bringing Belladonna up. She fired, a fume of clubs spewing out the end of the barrel like a muzzle flash as a spade shot out and collided with the red pony's chest. A bunch of black hearts spat out her chest. I fired a second shot which collided with her head, shattering it into a mess of diamonds.

The ground gave out from beneath me and I fell yet again. As I fell, my body returned to normal and a world came into view. 'You're a failure, a fucking failure!' yelled a hurtful voice, that struck me to the core. 'Just a fucking durr, that'll go nowhere in life.' It yelled again.

I began to hover above the world, my vision blurred with neon colors. 'What kind of poor excuse of a son are you?'

“Just let me explain!” I called back, though not through my own mouth.

'Shut the fuck up and go to bed,' the voice yelled.

"But I'm hungry..." I said timidly.

'I don't fucking care. Bed, NOW!' I felt cold rain splash against me, though it was salty like tears. My body began to shiver.

“But-” I began.

'But nothing! I said no goddammit!' the voice screamed.

“But you said if I-”

'I don't fucking care what I said...'

The world beneath me began to get closer and that's when I realized it... it was Earth... my home.

“I didn't do it, I swear!” I cried out. My head was jerked to the side as the sound of something metal striking flesh and bone sounded like a gong, echoing in my mind.

'Don't fucking lie you little shit!' the voice screamed.

The world got closer and as it did, I saw my old home in the middle of the forest. But as I got closer, I started to get pulled away.

“I don't want to go to the city!” I cried out.

'I don't fucking care. You're coming with me and that's final!'

My body was suddenly jerked away and the view of my old home was torn away as I was pulled over the view of a large city. I now flew dangerously close to the ground. “GAHHH!” I screamed. Just before I hit the ground, a pair of arms wrapped under my armpits and lifted me up. They were strong arms.

I turned my head so I could see over my shoulder. It was Derreck, keeping my from hitting the ground... keeping me from hitting the absolute lowest point...

'Get the fuck out and don't come back until dinner time.' The door slammed in my face and was followed by the audible click of a door being locked.

'You fucking little shit! Where the fuck were you?!'

Derreck held me up high and the next thing I knew, I was back at my old home, in the country. 'Is that the best you can do? Huh?! You'll never go anywhere! You're going to be a fucking deadbeat just like your father!'

Suddenly Derreck released me and I fell downwards and towards the world bellow which seemed to grow increasingly darker with each passing moment. There was a lot of yelling, roaring, pain, anguish... my head throbbed and pounded, red outlines around my vision thumped along with my heartbeat.

'You're fucking nothing!' My eye clenched shut. 'Get over yourself cause you're just a fucking deadbeat and you'll never be anything more than that!'

I grabbed my head and roared loudly as my head began to pound. Suddenly, just before I could hit the ground, a pair of hooves wrapped around me, cradling me gently. A crazy warp tunnel thing appeared and I fell into it, but the hooves guided my path.

Suddenly my body felt... warm. No longer damp or cold... no longer shivering. The darkness had faded and was replaced by a light. I put on a pair of sunglasses at first to turn the light of this beautiful new world into the darkness of my old world I was used to.

“This place is so fucking gay,” I heard myself say out loud. “That's fucking stupid,” I said again, rather harshly. After a little while longer of saying hurtful things about this world... my body became really warm. I took off my sunglasses and tossed them away, embracing the full warmth and beauty of the world.

'I love you... son,' said a warm voice.

'Wow! That's terrific! I'm so proud of you!' said the voice again.

'I'll always be there for you,' it continued. Tears rolled out my eyes but... there weren't cold, or hurtful like before... no, there were warm and... cozy. The pony holding me nestled its muzzle into my neck. 'I'll always love you,' she whispered. She gently brought me down. My body somehow slipped right through solid matter, right through the roof of a pony dwelling and slammed me into a bed.

My world faded into darkness. After a short while, a gleaming light shone in the darkness. It grew closer and closer until I realized it was a skull, the one from my shirt which had been transformed somehow.

A dark figure stepped forwards, the skull on the chest of his black clad uniform. “I'll always have your back,” said a deep voice before the light of the skull overtook me.

* * *

I awoke with a gasp, the light shining through the nearby window blinding me. “AHHHH! GAHHH! CELESTIA!” I screamed out loud as my legs and arms flailed. I ended up falling off whatever it was I was lying on.

I leapt up but was struck by a pain in my mouth, specifically on the right side. I noticed that part of my mouth had some kinda cotton or gauze in it. I went to pull it out but a voice called out. “WAIT! HOLD ON!” the voice screamed.

I stopped and looked. Minuette was standing there, no longer wearing her dentist apparel. Well... like most ponies in this town, she wasn't wearing anything at all but I'd become accustomed to that.

“Don't remove that gauze for at least another half hour...” she trailed off and let out a deep exhale. “Well then... look who's up, sleeping beauty,” she mentioned and I blinked then swallowed, the aftertaste of blood in my throat.

I noticed it was a bit drafty. All I had on was my boxers. “What did yah do tah me?” I asked, my voice muffled by the gauze.

“Well... I cast a... I think it was a analgesic spell... and you tore your clothes off and started speaking random things... I had to restrain you to remove your tooth since I was already partly done. I was going to give you a dose of pain killer but... well, I respected my agreement with you not to use needles and I didn't want to use another spell so... that's why there's a bit of pain.”

I rubbed the sore side of my face as she levitated over a folded piece of clothing. “Here. I cleaned your laundry for you too. Hope you don't mind,” she said and I nodded. I slipped my pants and socks back on and pulled out my wallet. She waved her hoof.

“Oh, it's okay. Really. It was my pleasure. I love do dentistry work but... well, most ponies think I'd be a terrible dentist.” She looked to her flank, namely her cutie mark.

I pulled out three Luna bits and handed them over. “For your time and the resources then,” I said with a nod and she simply smiled.

“Okay... and make sure to come back every now and then for a proper cleaning. And make sure to floss regularly,” she mentioned and I nodded as I put on my boots. Even my watch and necklace had come off.

I was about to leave and she stopped me. “Oh and... I take it you like to exercise but for the next... say twenty four hours, you have to try and take it easy. Anything physically strenuous will cause that cut to open up again. No exercise, no sports, nothing. Not even a light jog. And try not to eat anything solid. Mostly just liquids. And nothing too hot either,” she said and I nodded.

“Oh... and I know it might not seem like it's exercise but... no... uhm... well, you know,” she said and I cocked an eyebrow.

“No... what?” I asked. She rubbed her hoof in circles on the floor.

“Well... you know... I know it feels good and everything but it can cause your cut to open up again,” she replied and I blinked. She opened her mouth as if to say something then just bit her lip. I scratched the side of my head. She let out a deep exhale. “Sexual intercourse...” she said timidly then blinked as I stared at her blankly. “No sex okay. It might not be the most physically exerting thing but... your cut would probably open up again. Just take it easy for a day. Lay on the couch, watch tv... okay?” she suggested and I just nodded.

“Okay... thanks doc,” I said, muffled from the gauze in my mouth. With that I was off and heading back home. I found it a little difficult to drive. Everything kind of blurred as I sped up so I stayed to the outskirts of town and away from pedestrians.

I finally arrived home and felt really tipsy. I looked in the rear view mirror of my truck and saw my face was rather pale. I shut off the truck but ended up leaving the keys in the ignition and the truck parked out front the library, rather than in the car shelter.

I stood up and stumbled inside. As I arrived through the front door, my mother came to greet me then stopped dead in her tracks. “E-Evan... you look terrible. What in Equestria happened?” she asked and I just nodded my head rather weakly.

“Had a tooth pulled,” I replied and staggered over to the couch before flopping down. I had felt fine when I woke up at the dentist's but now I was feeling pretty crumby. Spike came to my side with a glass of orange juice, pulp and all.

“Uhh... here,” he offered and I gave him a smile.

I gave him a pat on the head before removing the bloody gauze from my mouth. “Thanks kid... yer alright,” I said, taking the glass of orange juice and downing it thankfully. It tasted a little off due to the blood that mixed in with it, but it was pretty good none the less.

Lassie came to my side and laid there, sad eyes and quiet. It was the first time I had seen her like this. She wasn't talkative, wasn't overjoyed... she was just there, looking rather depressed. “I'll be okay Lassie,” I whispered, rubbing her head. I saw her heartfelt eyes look to and fro as she lay there.

My mother sat on the chair across from the couch. “What did she do to you?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“Pulled out a tooth... gave me a wild pain killer... spell,” I stated. I closed my eye and yawned. “Said to... to not... no sex... tch... ah-ha-ha... wouldn't say that at first either... no physical activity either,” I said, quietly and more of a weak mumble than anything.

Spike spoke up. “So... since he's sick, does that mean we can have popsicles?” Spike asked, Lassie's head perking up from the last part. Twilight gave him a stern look but I just nodded.

“Yeah kid... yeah, that sounds pretty good... maybe... get one for each of us... yeah?” I mumbled, eye still closed. After a few moments I thought I was going to pass out but I felt something cold press to my face. I cracked open my eye to see Lassie with a two popsicles, one for me and one for her. Spike and Twilight also had one. Lassie had a worried look on her face, one a dog has for their loved one.

I smiled faintly and took it from her with a nod. “Suppose it's... kinda weird seeing me like this... huh?” I smiled. Lassie nodded sadly.

“But you'll be better by tomorrow... right?” she asked surely and I smiled.

“Yeah... you bet,” I said reassuringly... or as reassuringly as one could while looking like I did. I licked the popsicle a few times before just sucking on it, to lazy to extend my tongue multiple times.

After a while I felt exhaustion begin to overtake me again. Everything seemed to zone out. “Hey guys...” I trailed off as I felt I was about to pass out. “I love you...” My world faded off and I slipped into nothingness...

* * *

Canterlot...

A dead stallion lay in the street in a puddle of his own cold blood. He wore the signature royal guard armor, specifically Celestia's royal guard. The golden armor was unscathed, save for some of his blood that had splattered on it.

A stallion in detective uniform knelt down, removing his fedora and using it like a fan. His brutally scared face was withered from a burn he had received some time ago. He used a pair of pliers to pick up a little piece of brass. The top of the cylinder was left open, with burnt powder residue on the inside.

On the bottom read '9mm'. He stood up and spoke to a fellow detective. “Always the same... always... I know it's her... it,” he said, his voice crispy and aged. Another detective, a mare, stepped up.

“Give it up Heartigan, you're paranoid,” she said and the stallion looked to her then pointed at his face.

“I've seen it, dammit. Seen it with my own goddess damned eyes. And it's the same every time. Small entry would. No witnesses, no evidence whatsoever except this... these little metal things... these. The buck do they mean, Keyes?” he asked, holding the brass cylinder with his pliers.

Keyes shrugged. “Maybe it's a puzzle... and anyway, the inspectors even said, it was an electrical fire. You were delusional from all the smoke inhalation,” Keyes stated but Heartigan just spat.

“Delusional my flank. I had it cornered... but she, it, outwitted me. Just like it's outwitting the entire goddess damned force!” he said, his voice still crispy but now annoyed. The mare took the brass casing.

With a sigh, she spoke. “I'll take this to forensics. See what they can pull up,” she said but again Heartigan was cross.

“You know as well as I do, they'll come up with the same crap they always do. Some kinda weird print they've never seen before but it matches all the other ones. Yet they can't trace it to anypony, or any gryphon, dragon, zebra, donkey... nothing. Zero, zilch, zip, nada...” he trailed off and Keyes just huffed.

“Would you rather bring it in?” she asked in a rather sarcastic tone, knowing the answer already. He just frowned at her and she smirked in an annoyed way. “Thought as much. Now stay out of my way... old stallion,” she spat and with that she was off.

Heartigan stayed at the crime scene, along with several other royal guard ponies and fellow officers. Under his breath, he muttered to himself. “Bitch.”

Author's Note

Fun story from real life. So I was backing out of my house in town and now that it's winter in Canada everyone parks on the side of the road even though the law tells you not to. Anyway, so I'm backing up through my yard and my truck is just puttering along through the snow but the very moment the tires touched pavement it caught traction and Cadence zipped back and across the street. Suddenly my truck jerked and I thought 'Shit, I just hit a snowbank' but as I was about to pull away I noticed that I had in fact backed into a van. So I looked around and saw no one was looking, shrugged and was like "Well, don't park on the side of the road" then drove away.

Chapter 44

'Magnum caliber...'

Derreck's perspective...

I put the finishing polish on the bolt. The rifle... Trillium, looked stunning. As stunning as a Mosin Nagant could. The rifle now had a finesse look about it.

With the final additions made, I set the rifle down on the stand in Evan's room. He had better take care of the rifle this time, or I'd tune him in some kinda good.

It was late... around nine thirty I think. I looked over and saw a couple sets of dumbbells. I curled my arm and flexed, then with my opposite hand felt my biceps. My lips smirked, my face wrinkling a little as I did. I felt a little older now for some reason. Ever since that Baltimare incident I looked fairly aged. Nothing too severe, save the gray hair along the sides, but I now looked like I was getting on in my years. Late thirties.

I walked over to the dumbbells and grabbed a pair of 180 pounders. They were heavy... really heavy. Each one weighed about as much as a full grown man. I set them down and stretched out really well before gripping one in each hand and began to curl them.

All I wanted was tension, blood coursing through my veins and a stiff feel. I stood around for half an hour, curling weights until I was satisfied. In the end I did more of an exercise than a warm up. My arms were tense and stiff. I felt strong, powerful and ready for anything... well, most anything.

I walked over to Evan's drawers and snagged a fresh shirt and pants. I needed a new pair, mine were pretty tattered. His shirts were a little small for me and clung to my frame with a snug feeling, revealing every curve of my torso region.

I was going to sneak out the basement window but had found in recent days that with my increased mass, I couldn't fit. I crept up the stairs and through the living room. Just as I reached the door, my ear twitched. I spun to see the dog sitting up with a wondering look.

“Just me, don't worry,” I replied and she rubbed her eyes with a yawn.

“Why are you...” she trailed off with a yawn before continuing. “Up so early?” she asked and I gave her a blunt answer.

“Just out for a stroll,” I stated, creeping over and giving her a scratch behind the ears. “Now... go back to sleep,” I told her and she laid back down, yawning once more before passing out.

'Some kinda guard dog she is,' I thought to myself as I left the building. I made my way to the side of Evan's truck... Cadence he called her. I cracked open one of the tool boxes and retrieved the SKS rifle... Applebloom, the hell kinda name was that. It was nice though. The rifle had a mirror shine from the lamination and the stock wood was finely crafted. Evan liked to call it walnut but... I think it was actually a type of birch wood.

I slipped some extra loaded stripper clips into my pockets before thumbing a full ten rounds into the magazine. The bottom of the magazine had a nasty hole in it, courtesy of Evan pulling the magazine plug from the rifle... twit.

I pulled back on the bolt and let it slam forwards on it's own, loading a round into the chamber. He called the bolt and carrier a receiver... don't know why. Using my middle finger, I flicked the safety on. The safety on these rifles were crude but amazingly effective. A little metal tab that swung behind the trigger to keep it from being set off.

I slung the rifle around my back as I shut the toolbox. I contemplated for a moment about also taking his handgun... heh, handgun... more like a handcannon. That thing exerted more force than an M16... about 300ft/lbs more force... and only 50ft/lbs less than the SKS on my back. Factory loads said they could produce 1800ft/lbs of force but with the regular 300g JHP Evan had, it usually only produced around 1600ft/lbs.

I heard a while back that a company called Magsafe made a bullet for the handgun that produced nearly 2155ft/lbs of force, nearly six hundred more than the regular cartridges... probably overloaded cartridges... or some kinda fancy bullet.

After giving it some thought, I left the handcannon. The gun weighed around four and a half pounds and was shinier than I'd like it to be. Besides the point, it was his gun. Probably wouldn't work for me.

I jogged my way to the Everfree, pacing my breath and making sure not to wear myself down just yet. As I reached the treeline, I felt shivers go down my back. Howls emitted from inside the jungle that lay ahead. Most of the sounds that followed sounded like nothing I had ever heard before, and I had done my fair share of traveling back on my home world.

I unslung the rifle and held it in both hands, trigger-finger just outside the trigger guard, safety now off. I hunched a bit and crept my way into the 'forest'. My boots squelched against the soft mucky terrain as I did my best to stay silent.

Not five feet into this place, I could feel an instant rise in temperature. It was muggy... humid... reminded me too much of tropical jungles in the third world countries. Sweat beaded down my face, streaming around my eye patch.

Without the use of my left eye, I had to be extra vigilant, my other senses needing to pick up the slack of my hindered vision. Though with that in mind, there wasn't much one could see when it was this dark.

The rifle brushed against foliage, again tropical. The creepy trees around me seemed as if they were moving in, enclosing me. No matter where I went, it seemed like I was walking in circles. I'd see the same trees over and over again, hideous faces made from the shadows staring me down.

Sounds creaked and croaked along with the sound of bugs and such. I stopped for a moment and my nostrils twitched as I inhaled deeply through my nose, sniffing the air. It reeked of Timberwolf but... there was something else.

My ear flickered and I listened but couldn't come up with anything solid, mostly just crickets and such.

I kept moving, sometimes using my left hand to brush away thick leaves the size of my torso that blocked my path. Some trees and foliage looked deformed, decrepit and easily like something from a nightmare.

Something rustled nearby, like small branches or underlying foliage. Slowly, and silently, I extended the bayonet on the rifle. I lined up the sights and readied my finger on the trigger, squeezing back to the sweet spot. All I had to do now was wait, then with the slightest bit of pressure on the trigger...

Foliage rustled about a few dozen yards away. I rested my cheek into the stock, lining up the sights with the movement. A moment past and a hare with horns leapt out. In my shock, I nearly jerked the trigger as I restrained myself from stumbling forwards in shock. I regained proper posture and slowly eased off the trigger. There was no need to reveal my location to nearby predators.

Just as I was lowering my rifle with a relaxed sigh, something rustled behind me. The hairs on my neck prickled and I rolled to one side just as a massive mass tackled the air in the spot I had been just seconds ago, swiping with sharp claws at nothing in an attempt to snag me.

I came to my feet in a crouch position but as I did, a scorpion tail swatted me and sent me tumbling away, rifle slipping from my hands. “Fuck!” I hissed as I found my feet and skidded to a stop.

I pivoted to face my aggressor. A massive manticore stood before me, tail swinging to and fro, ready to strike at me. It's wings gave a gentle flap, ready to take flight if needed. It had a wicked set of fangs but the bottom set protruded more and gleamed. I gritted my teeth.

“Nice under-bite... let's boogie!” I snarled. The creature roared and charged at me, lunging its tail for a deadly strike. I dodged the tail strike but not the initial tackle in which it pinned me to the ground, holding down my shoulders with massive paws.

As its mouth opened to chew my head off, my feet found traction on his underbelly and booted him off, sending him a few feet away and giving me enough time to flip my body backwards and to my feet.

The beast stepped side to side, licking its chops as it readied for another attack. It charged again. I charged at it as well and at the last possible second slid down as it leapt through the air. It plunged through the air and into a tree as I swept myself up and to my feet in a blissful manner.

The manticore was dazed from the impact, quickly shaking it's head from side to side. I brought my arms up in a boxer-esque stance. I flexed and tensed my body. This was about to get serious.

The creature lunged at me full force, I went to side step but was caught by its wildly swinging tail. The beast caught me hard, slamming my body to the ground with vicious impact. I grunted but quickly rolled to the side as the scorpion tail stabbed at my location.

I kept rolling as the tail kept stabbing. As I rolled I found strength and pushed up, launching myself a couple feet into the air, not much but enough to grab my footing and back flip to dodge the next tail stab.

I landed on my feet and wiped off my lip, rubbing away the dirty slim. “Okay...” I huffed. The beast leapt at me again but this time I flopped down and as it passed over me I booted my feet into its stomach and launched it further behind me. I rolled to my feet and faced it. “Come on... you can do better than that,” I taunted.

It stepped around, like a predator examining it's prey. Circling me, it grunted and snarled. “Yeah... nice tasty human steak... Mmmm, delicious,” I poked. With that it charged but slid to it's side unpredictably and swiped at me with viciously sharp claws.

The claws sliced me open, cutting across my chest and a bit of my stomach. I was sent hurtling through underbrush and into a slight opening by a mucky pond of some sort. I groaned as I stood up, my shirt falling to pieces around me. The deep gashes in my body sealed shut as my healing factor kicked in.

Strange thing really, the healing factor. One day in this crazy world I just suddenly... had it. The beast rummaged through the brush and into the opening. I clenched my fists and snarled. “That's enough outta you.”

I decided it was time to end this playing around. It lowered its front shoulders and approached me cautiously, it's tail waving about. I waited, still on the defensive... like I had been this whole fight.

Cocking its tail back, the manticore put force behind a curved swing that could probably shatter bones. I tensed and let the tail strike my side with savage force. My arms wrapped around its tail and I stayed with the swing, riding out the pain that ensued.

As the creature finished the swing, I planted my feet and with a vicious roar gave it a yank. The manticore briefly lost its footing but that was all I needed. With a powerful grunt, I exerted everything I had and began to drag it in circles, slowly building momentum.

As I pulled it along, the beast scrambled to gain traction. Soon enough the weight of the beast added to the momentum of the circular motions began to lift the beast off the ground. I began to simply pivot on my heels, swinging in complete 360 motions.

Finally we were twirling around in a blurred whirlpool of motion. As I lost my sense of coordination I released its tail and sent the beast hurtling away. Tumbling about, I found my balance then sturdied myself, just in time to see the beast spread its wings and take flight. “Damn,” I muttered.

It came back down to the ground and clawed dirt up several times, like a bull ready to charge. I spit to the side and smirked. “Okay... show me what yah got,” I stated aloud. Like a wild caged animal, it howled loudly and rampaged towards me, shredding up dirt behind itself.

As it neared me, it went to slide swipe me again. I rolled underneath its mighty swing, tucking my large frame into a smaller target. As the swipe missed, I pushed myself off the ground, into the air and cocked back my right leg.

With a powerful kick, I drove the point of my boot into the side of its head. Using momentum gained from the impact of my strike, I pushed myself further into the air and twirled my body in a 360 motion. I cocked my left leg and let it curve into a strike that drove the heel of my left foot into the back of the creature's head, right were the spine meets the skull.

I fell forwards after that and to the ground but landed in a roll, quickly spinning myself into a crouch form to meet a possible retaliation. I huffed slightly at the sight of the fallen manitcore. He wasn't dead, far from it. I hadn't put lethal force behind my strike. I could if I had wanted to, but...

The beast tried to stand up but just ended up flopping back down to its belly with a whine. I walked over and it groaned at me. “You cut me open...” I replied as it tried once more to stand up. I slid my body underneath its belly and propped it up to all fours. After a moment, I stepped out from underneath the creature.

A few months back I had been exploring and was attacked by a manticore. It only took a single shot to take it down and the fight was over in seconds. Didn't take long to realize it had a cub. Not too strange there wasn't a father around, kinda like the lions back home. Mother raises the cubs and the father... well, they just breed and that's their part of the whole thing.

In the end... I dunno, I felt obliged, as if it was something I was supposed to do, to take the manticore under my protection. Didn't mean I was easy on it. I didn't come by every night, but I would generally bring it fish, or something along those lines, until it was ready to hunt for itself.

As it grew bigger, which was a simple matter of weeks, I taught it how to fight... rather viciously too. At least it had a natural sense of killing and wasn't a wimp. Since then it was a two way thing when we fought. I trained it to be better and it kept me at my best, even training me how to combat against mythical creatures like itself with my bare hands.

It nestled its head into my chest and purred, trying to suck up. I gave it a backhanded swat to the cheek in which it whimpered. “No! You didn't get the killing strike. No treat,” I replied sternly. Technically it had gotten me pretty good once, but the cuts weren't deep enough to be instantly fatal. I sniffed the air. A horrid stench made my nose twitch.

“You do that?” I asked but the manticore looked to me, shaking its head quickly. I was going to ask a second question, or maybe make a comment, but a splashing sound behind me caught my attention.

I spun on my heels only to find a hideous lizard... or serpent of some kind rising from the swampy marsh. It had a long neck with a crazy snake like head. My shoulders dropped as I looked at the beast with awe.

“Oh shit...” I muttered in a deep tone. With a loud screech it swung its head back then... breathed at me? Its breath had a horrid stench that nearly gagged me. At first I was stunned, but then I was disoriented and sick to my stomach. Feeling weak and feeble, I could barely keep my footing.

With a terrifying screech, the beast emerged from the swamp. It was big... huge... massive. With another screech, it shook its body to and fro, gaining momentum in its tail before hammering me several dozen yards with a tail swipe powerful enough to shatter every bone in my body.

I tumbled and hurtled across the unforgiving dirt and muck. As my body finally stopped, I lay face down, still weak from whatever had happened when it breathed on me. The hairs on the back of my neck prickled and my senses struck full alert.

My pupils sharpened and I felt every reflex return to my control. I pushed down hard and flung myself out of harm's way as the beast slammed its sharp lizard nose into the ground. Rolling to my feet, I looked at the beast.

It was a truly terrifying sight to behold. Clenching my right fist, I let out a pained howl. “Haaaaaaa!” I felt bones in my arm start to move while my wrist bones separated with agonizing pain. “GAAARRHHHH!” I roared out. The skin between my knuckles split open and a shew of blood sprang out, along with three razor sharp, foot long claws.

My vision focused all my attention on the beast, everything else fogged out. I swung my arm back and charged forwards with vicious intent. My speed kept gaining and gaining until I as finally within range of the creature's neck.

I crouched low, arm swung back, then pounced forwards and gave an uppercut swing. My bone claws sliced right through its flesh and perfectly decapitated the beast with just the one cut.

The creature's body slumped and collapsed while its head rolled away. I was slightly shocked to say the least. I half expected a bit more of a challenge from something so horrifying. Maybe tougher skin... something... anything.

“Huh... well... that was a letdown” I trailed off in slight disappointment. I turned around to the manticore and shrugged. “You were more of a figh-” I was cut off by some squelching noises behind me. Turning ever so slowly, I looked back to the beast.

Slime and goo seeped from its neck as two forms slowly grew out from the stumped neck. My eyes went wide. “Not good,” I muttered. After a few seconds, I was faced by the same beast I had just slain... except it now had two heads.

I began to back up then found myself pressed into the manticore, who was frozen in fear. “Run... now!” I hissed and the manticore didn't need to be told twice. It rushed off into the forest. It may be a monster of sorts, but he was still young.

I turned back to the... whatever it was. Both heads sucked back, bringing in air before pecking their heads forward with their mouths open. Streams of fire projected and hosed the area.

I leapt to one side then jumped over a barrier of fire the beast had created. Spinning to face the beast, I clenched both hands. “Haaaa-” Its tail slapped me hard. Not as hard as the first time but still with enough force that I was tossed through the air.

My back side slammed into a thick tree trunk but even so my body was smashed right through the tree. The top part of the tree collapsed towards the creature and I figured I might get lucky and it would be crushed. Instead, one of the heads grabbed it with razor sharp teeth and chomped the tree into bits.

“Ohhhh shit,” I whispered. The trees nearby had been set ablaze and I prayed it didn't spark into wildfire... at the moment though, that was the least of my problems. “It spits fire... its heads regrow...” I thought back to when it breathed on me. “Its breath is toxic... fuck,” I swore.

“I take it back... I'd have rather it died easily,” I whispered to myself as I stood up, groaning and sore. I held my right hand to my left elbow and my left hand to my right shoulder. With a grunt of pain, I relocated my shoulder into its proper spot as other bones in my body clicked back together.

Cocking both arms to my side, I let out an angered roar as I felt my strength skyrocket. Claws now extended from both hands, blood seeped from the cuts in my knuckles they had made.

I felt my back arch a bit and lock into place. My senses gained a new height in perception and everything else except what was important seemed to zone out. 'How do I kill this thing?' I wondered.

'Its head regrows from the stump... not just its head, two heads...' I thought. The smell of burning pitch caught my nose. I twitched a bit as I looked over to the burning wreck of trees. My eyes looked side to side as I thought to myself.

The beast was done screwing around and was scurrying towards me, hissing and screeching from both heads. The tail whipped at me again. I let out a powerful roar as my body tensed and readied itself for the impact.

The tail slammed into my side and I wrapped my arms around it. The force was still substantial but I held tight, feet firmly planted in the ground. The tail's force pushed me across the ground, my feet digging a trench as I was pushed along until finally the beast had no momentum left.

Still holding the tail with my left hand, I used my right bone claws to slash several times at the tail. Hacks of meat were chopped off, and slimy blood spewed out as I slashed its tail clean off.

Pulling back, the beast screeched and howled, namely in pain but also in anger. I stepped back, not sure what to expect. However, in the end I was relieved to find that unlike its heads, the tail did not grow back in doubles.

I had one plan, maybe two if I could draw enough strength for it... but for now, just one plan. As the beast frolicked in pain from its lost tail, I rushed over and grabbed a large branch that had been set ablaze.

The claws in my left hand retracted while I held the branch in said hand. “I really hope this works,” I prayed, rushing forwards while letting out a war cry. The beast turned its attention back to me. I felt every muscle in my body tense and grow stronger. Crouching low, I pounced with everything I had, leaping through the air while swinging back my claws. The beast stared at me as it went to retaliate, but it was too late... I hoped.

I slashed hard, decapitating the head completely. As I flew past its stumped neck, I twirled my body mid-flight then drove my claws into its back, digging in deep and getting a grip on the beast. The beast screeched out in pain and whipped its remaining head from side to side. With the burning branch in one hand, I ascended the beast, which now howled in complete agony as I crawled up its back with my claws.

Reaching the neck stump, I drove the burning branch into its neck. The wound was cauterized painfully. With an angry screech, the beast swung its remaining head and swatted me to the ground.

I was slammed into the hard dirt rather painfully, and with that, let out a groan as my eye closed. Before I could react, one of its sharp claws slammed into my chest and pinned me to the ground, threatening to crush me into pulp.

I let out a pained grunt, which drained the oxygen from my lungs. The sides of my vision grew pale and red, blood lines seeping into my vision. 'Really wish it had died pathetically,' I thought silently in what would seem to by my dying moments.

The pressure was suddenly alleviated as the beast removed its claws from my body. At first I didn't understand until I saw it swatting at the manticore which flew wildly through the air.

My ally stabbed with its scorpion tail, possibly injecting potent neurotoxins into the the other creature. At first glance it looked like a partially even match up, but within seconds the lizard serpent swatted my frie... hmm, my ally, to the ground with brutal force.

The serpent went for the killing blow. My anger, rage and fury all boiled over. I propelled myself up and held my left arm straight out, palm open. Arm tense, a ball of energy was quickly formed and launched at the lizard.

The rather weak energy blast struck its mark, hitting it in the head and gaining its attention. Claws retracted, I motioned with my middle finger for it to come over. “Yeah... I wasn't done with you just yet. I still want my money's worth,” I challenged.

My whole body flexed, muscles expanding to new levels. Veins protruded from underneath my skin, making themselves highly noticeable. I let out an empowering roar as an aura of red static electricity surrounded me.

My eye sharpened, everything in my vision turned to a darker hue and was coated in red. The powerful surges of energy pushed against the ground around me, the ground shaking slightly. The power emitted from my aura blew off my eye patch, revealing my damaged eye that now cleared. My pupil slanted perfectly vertical while the rest of my eye was shaded dark red.

Both sets of claws extended and were coated in an equally ominous flaming red aura. I looked at the serpent beast, fury burning from within. “It's time to fall... and at your height, it's gonna hurt when you hit the ground,” I snarled.

Crouching back, I cocked my right arm for a heavy swing. With incredible power, I pushed off the ground and flew straight through the air with perfect precision and speed.

In a blinding flash of motion, my claws sliced off its remaining head. I landed in a roll and rushed over to the burning brush. Grabbing a new burning branch I turned back to the beast which stumbled about headless.

I only had a matter of seconds but that was more than enough. Charging across the ground, I leapt through the air once more for a final killing strike. I landed, feet digging in while I drove the burning branch into its remaining stumped neck.

The beast squirmed and thrashed while I cut off its only source of life. Leaping back, I back flipped through the air and landed on the ground behind it. Grabbing one of its claw feet, or whatever they'd be called, I let out one final roar of strength as I began to twirl our bodies in circles.

In moments, our bodies were spinning in a spiraling blur. With that, I released the dying creature, sending it hurtling skywards. I clenched my fists and flexed, yelling out loudly in primal anger. The powerful aura that coated my body became jagged and pushed energy outwards. Stepping my left foot forwards, my right foot back, my hands cupped at my right side. I grunted while my body tensed.

“Let's see if I can pull this off!” I roared out in a rumbling tone. I felt a vibration in my palms, followed by a source of heat. A dark red light illuminated, shooting beams of dark red light through my fingers. A large shiny red aura of energy built up while the ground beneath me began to shake a bit more violently.

Still roaring, my echo became louder as I swung my hands forwards, still cupped and my right foot stepped forwards with my body's motion. The backlash from the blast was so powerful it drove my feet down into the ground while blasting away everything behind me, creating a wide trench.

A massive beam of energy shot out and nearly blew my arms back. Ripples ran down my arms as the blast was continuously emitted, launching into the air and vaporizing the creature. After a mere few seconds the energy dispersed and sparkled away into the air, the powerful energy blast now just a sparkling mist.

I was breathing heavily, the electric aura fading quickly. Smoke steamed off my body as I felt myself start to shrink back to my regular size. My arms dropped to my sides as my eye returned to its normal damaged state, blurring my vision once more.

Fumes of smoke poured out from the crater behind me. I fell to my knees, huffing deeply. The manticore returned to my side shortly thereafter, with both my eye patch and my rifle, the latter being held in its mouth by the sling as to not scratch the finish... just like I taught him.

It nestled into me which accidentally knocked me over. I was wiped... exhausted. “Wow... I'll have to research that creature later,” I whispered, barely even audible to myself. I looked to the manticore then reached into my pants which, like most of my clothes at this point, were really tattered.

I rooted out a fish from my pocket. It was kinda smushed. “Here,” I groaned. “I think you earned this,” I told the beast. Very gently, and graciously, the manticore took the treat. Savoring every bit of taste, the manticore took several seconds to eat it, rather than just downing it with one go.

I flopped onto my back and let out a sigh, smoke still rolling off me. I'd have to train like this more often, it was so fulfilling. But as of right now...

I rolled onto my side and held myself there while looking to the manticore. Slinging my rifle to my back, I also slid my eye patch back on before speaking. “I think... I need... a ride home,” I groaned. The manticore nudged its head under my body and tossed me onto its back before taking flight. 'Oh boy... whatta night...'

* * *

Evan's perspective...

I awoke rather drowsily and slowly sat up. I quickly realized I was no longer on the couch in the living room but rather on my bed in the basement. I sat for a good while, just stroking my face and yawning.

I didn't feel sore but my body felt... exhausted. As I sat there I ended up looking from place to place. I made note that at some point in the day I'd need to do some form of workout if I wanted to keep my form.

As I looked around, I spotted something that made my heart skip. I stood up and realized I was no longer wearing pants. I slipped on my eye patch and holy necklace then stepped over to my dresser and put on a pair of jeans along with a white t-shirt and socks.

Walking over to the table nearby, I kept wondering if this was some sort of... dream. Stepping up to the table, I stared blankly at it. There was a note hanging of her by a string. 'Take care of her this time, or I'll beat you senseless!'

I set the note aside and picked up Trillium, the Mosin Nagant PU sniper rifle. My heart fluttered as I went lightheaded. This... was crazy. He had polished all the bushings and barrel bands along with the bolt action to a mirror polished shine.

I racked the bolt. It was butter smooth, almost nicer than a Lee-Enfield... almost. I gently squeezed the trigger. It had a crisp feel and had a dangerously light trigger pull. The stock had obviously been sanded down and refurbished. It was so smooth but...

The whole stock had been painted jet black. All the markings on the rifle had been painted with white silicone or something of the like. I huffed deep breaths then slowly tried to wiggle the fore end stock piece. It wouldn't budge. It was right tight.

I slowly, and very cautiously, took the rifle apart. Derreck had completely refurbished the rifle. The inside of the stock had been bedded with what looked like some kind of epoxy. The rifle now sat perfectly stiff and wouldn't jiggle inside the stock when fired. The entire stock system had been bedded perfectly.

“Oh man... wow,” I whispered to myself. Lassie's voice spoke up and scared the hell outta me.

“WOAH! That looks wicked!” she chimed. I flinched then carefully set the rifle down. “I've never seen that one before!” Lassie said as she stepped up and looked at the rifle.

“I think you've seen it before... Derreck just... he just... customized the rifle,” I said, still in untter disbelief. Lassie blinked then looked to me.

“Are you feeling okay?” she asked and I looked to her, confusion in my eye.

“Uh... uhm... yeah, why wouldn't I be?” I asked curiously.

“Well, cause you were passed out and pale all yesterday so... we decided to let you rest the whole day but... well you were still on the couch then but now you're down here,”she mentioned. I just blinked.

“Wait... as in... yesterday like when I got my tooth pulled?” I asked but she shook her head.

“No, that was the day before yesterday.” I stood in awe.

“Shit... today's Twilight's birthday,” I muttered and Lassie shrugged.

“So?” she replied casually.

“Sooo,” I started, “I still haven't gotten her anything!” She just snickered.

“Pfft, so? She said herself she didn't really want anything from you, just for you to be here for her birthday,” Lassie replied and I groaned.

“Yes I know but I'm sure I could've gotten her something.” I groaned and flopped my head into my hands. “Ugh... I've failed as a son... again,” I replied but Lassie just patted me on the back... quite hard too.

“Oh don't be so hard on yourself. It'll be fine, really.” I just groaned. She hit me on the back again, equally as hard as before. “Now come on, we need your help upstairs setting up,” Lassie informed. I rose a brow. With a scoff she dragged me upstairs.

When we got up there, I saw Twilight's main selection of friends. Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy. There were also a few others; the three fillies known as The Cutie Mark Crusaders and a small selection of other ponies.

However, despite all the ponies, Twilight was nowhere to be seen. “Where's Twilight?” I asked, and Pinkie zoomed over.

“Isenthertogogetsomesodathenhadthecashierholdherupwhilewepreparedtheparty!” she blurted out then zoomed off. I just blinked while Rarity stepped up beside me.

“Darling, what she meant to say was we created a distraction for her in town,” she fluttered her eyes at me and I just nodded. “So how are you doing darling? I heard you've been terribly ill lately. I offered my help but Twilight insisted that you would recover on your own,” she said but I just shrugged.

“Nah, it was nothing. Just had a tooth pulled. Been chillin' like a villain, yah know?” I replied but was answered by a most regal voice.

“I do not believe villains just... chill,” everyone went a little silent and I turned around to find Celestia standing behind me.

“Eh Tia, what's shakin?” I said rather casually. There were several gasps in the crowd as everything went dead quiet. She rose an eyebrow with a somewhat cross face. “What?...” I trailed off and looked around. “Ohhhh! Yeaaahhh... Princess Tia, what's happenin?” I replied, equally as casual as before.

Everything stayed quiet and Celestia spoke. “Is that how you greet royalty?” she asked but I just shrugged.

“Dunno... Twilight's royalty but she prefers I address her like so,” I replied and the faintest smile crept across Celestia's face before she nodded and spoke in a stern tone again.

“Indeed. Perhaps I will have to assist Twilight Sparkle in her teachings of how one is to address royalty,” she said before stepping away to go speak with others. I didn't know whether she was being a bitch or...

Rarity pulled me down to her level. “How could you possibly address her like that?! Princess Celestia of all ponies?!” she whispered and I just shrugged. “She could've thrown you away to rot in a prison cell for the rest of eternity!” Again, I just shrugged. Her face gave a look that made her look flustered along with a heavy blush on her cheeks. “Oohhh darling...” she whispered as she leaned towards me, eyes fluttering shut. “You're so daring and courageous. Why couldn't we have met earlie-” she was cut off by Pinkie screaming.

“SHE'S COMING! HIDE!” The lights went off while a pair of hooves yanked me away. Applejack spoke up.

“Come on, this way,” she said in her classic southern accent. She pulled me down behind a couch. “Yah gotta stay away from that gal, at least fer a little while,” she informed me and I cocked a brow.

“Ah do?” I replied and she just exhaled then nodded.

“Yeah, yah do,” she stated then put a hoof over my mouth. “Now hush. Wait till Twilight comes in then jump up an yell surprise,” she informed me. There was a dead silence. It was so nerve racking and it wasn't even suspenseful yet in a way it was.

We all waited... and waited... and waited. 'Jeez... how long does it take to open a friggin door?' I wondered but as I was thinking that, the door swung open. Everypony jumped up, confetti spewed from Pinkie's cannon while everypony screamed out 'SURPRISE!'

Twilight nearly jumped out of her fur. For the briefest moment I thought for sure her eyes bugged out of her head. She settled in seconds just before Pinkie rushed up. “Did we get you?! We got you didn't we?! WE SURPRISED HER EVERYPONY!” Pinkie screamed out ecstatically.

I let out the breath I didn't know I had been holding. Ponies moved up to wish her a happy birthday and such. I stood up and smiled. Twilight looked so happy. Seeing her friends... and family too. Her father, mother, brother and sister in law were all here.

After most of the ponies had wished her well and had started to mingle, I moved through the crowd. Grabbing her from behind, she let out a yelp while I picked her up, held her tight and gave her a kiss to the cheek. “Happy birthday, mom!”

After a second of hugging her, I set her back down. She had been talking to her father, mother, brother and sister in law, whom all looked to me with raised brows. “Howdy,” I greeted them.

Twilight brushed back her mane. “You all remember Evan, right?” she asked, formally greeting us... again. The only one to step up was her brother, Shiny I think his name was.

“Shining Armor,” he greeted and I shook his hoof. My conscious spoke up.

'Twilight's brother right?' my conscious asked and I nodded inwardly. 'So his name would be... Shining Sparkle?' he asked and I snickered briefly to which they all looked at me.

“Sorry,” I apologized as I withdrew my hand and rubbed my nose. “My nose was tickly,” I lied fluently.

I looked to the parents. “Grandpa, Grandma,” I greeted with a nod and they both just buried their faces into one of their own front hooves. Taking away their hooves, they looked to me with smiles.

“How have you been lately, Evan?” grandpa asked.

I shrugged. “Meh... off and on, you kno-” I was cut off by a scream, followed by the sound of liquid splashing on the ground. Everypony looked over and we saw a mare backed into a wall, a table knocked over, punch and treats all of the floor and Lassie just standing there.

“Well, a simple 'No' would've been fine too. No need to be rude about it,” she said and everypony gasped. I groaned then rushed up. Stepping beside Lassie, I called out.

“Don't worry everypony...” I called out then trailed off. With a deep exhale, I continued. “This... is Lassie. She's the family dog... she can-” I was cut off by the screaming mare.

“SHE CAN TALK!” She yelped and I nodded.

“Yes... as you all probably know by now... she can talk. It's nothing to worry about,” I replied.

My conscious spoke up. 'Jeez, you'd think for a world of talking, technicolor ponies with magic, a talking dog would be the least baffling thing.' I just nodded and within seconds ponies returned to mingling.

I turned to the mess but found that Pinkie and Lassie were battling to clean it up... with their tongues no less. I looked around and saw Fluttershy. Quickly making my way over to her, I approached her timidly, knowing how shy she was. In the quietest voice I could manage, I spoke up. “Hey... Flutters... ahem... hi,” I greeted, not mocking her but making sure I didn't come off as terrifying, or at least doing my best at it.

She looked to me and leaned lower. “Relax,” I said quietly as I sat down on my knees, getting to eye level with her.

“Oh... uhm... I really should be... uhm,” she stammered.

“Flutters I... ugh... ohh... I know, I'm horrifying. It's terrible,” I muttered. “I just wanted to thank you.” She stood there for a moment, ears perked up. She straightened herself up.

“T-t-th-thank me... f-f-fo-or what? Oh, if you don't mind me asking?” She asked. I looked over to Lassie, whom was having the time of her life with Pinkie.

“For Lassie... for everything. I'm sorry about how we met, if I could, I'd take it back,” I apologized, remembering how I had put her at gunpoint when I thought she was a home invader... all those months ago. It felt like just yesterday.

She nodded with a sincere smile. “Thank you. I'm sorry you thought I was a home invader. I would never ever steal ever. And I'm happy you like your dog,” she said, smiling brightly. I held out my hand.

“I think we already are but... friends?” I asked. She nodded and shook my hand.

“Of course,” she said. I just sat there, holding her hoof in a shake while she stood there, smiling back. Before either of us could say anything, Rainbow Dash called over.

“Hey Fluttershy, come over here! Look at this!” she laughed. I looked over and saw Pinkie's pet alligator and Rainbow Dash's pet tortoise rolling around on the ground together. I sat there but was suddenly tackled from behind.

Gray hooves wrapped around me, followed by a bubbly voice. “Evan!” Derpy cried out happily. I chuckled to myself as I stood up, her still clinging to my back and hugging me tightly.

“Hey Derpy. How's it going?” I asked, picking her off my back and bringing her into a proper hug. She snuggled in tight.

“I'm good. How have you been?” she asked and I didn't really answer.

“So, still delivering papers?” I asked and she nodded.

“I read in the newspaper you were really hurt badly. Lots of broken bones,” she said and I nodded.

“It's okay. I'm fine. You don't gotta worry about me, promise,” I said and she turned around, tail raised. I turned around too and we bumped flanks. “Tail twist swear,” I replied. We turned back around and I smiled. She was so nice, cute and innocent. “So Derpy, how've yah been?” I asked and she gave a 'so-so' look.

“I've been alright. Nothing special, nothing bad. How about you?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“A bit of both,” I said. Looking to my mother, I saw how happy she was, talking with friends, hugging her family... partying with Pinkie.

Derpy spoke up. “I'd like it if we could play together some time. You're really fun!” she chimed as I turned back to look at her. I went to say yes but a voice broke in.

“My sincere apologies but... may I speak with Evan?” asked a voice from before. Derpy took a bow but slipped a little. I swung down and caught her body, then helped her back up.

“Gotcha,” I said with a bright smile. I gave her a hug and nodded. “Sure, we'll have to hang out sometime soon, go on a muffin adventure or something,” I told her and she nodded before turning to leave.

I myself turned to face Celestia. “Alright... what's going down?” I asked and she blinked blankly.

“Well... nothing is going down but I do need to speak with you,” she informed. I waited for her to speak but instead, she turned around and began walking to the upstairs staircase. “In private,” she added in.

I tossed my hands up a bit with a roll of my eye and she spoke up again. “I saw that.” I followed her up the staircase and found she wasn't really leading me upstairs so much as to the outside balcony.

“You seem to lack respect when it comes to authority and royalty,” she mentioned. I twitched my lip.

“Dunno... ah guess. If yah say so,” I commented. I saw a faint smirk reach her lips before it quickly faded into that stern look again.

“That is precisely what I mean. Most of my subjects would have been more submissive. You are more transparent, honest and blunt with your actions towards myself,” she said calmly and I just shrugged.

We reached the balcony and she locked the doors behind us. Though I wasn't sure why she did as any pegasus could easily just fly up and see us. She hopped her forelegs up on the railing while I just leaned against it.

She let out a sigh. “It has been sometime since I could just...” she kicked off her royal shoes and set her crown aside. “Be myself. Ponies always address me so highly and they will never be themselves around me. Even my sister always takes me seriously, never accepting my offers to play around and instead taking it as some kind of test. She won't do anything anymore. Make a mess, disarrange the library books, mismatch the armor suits in the hallways, pull pranks on the guards... anything.” She sounded so... depressed.

“Oh... uhm... I'm sorry to hear that. Man... it must suck to be a princess,” I stated and she laughed.

“Well... I will be honest. There are times I wish I could just... run away and never return.” She looked to the sky, a tear strolling down her cheek. “But alas, my subjects rely upon me.”

I just nodded and looked into the distance. “Kinda held down huh?” I replied and she nodded.

“Yes... and sometimes, even when I ask one of my loyalest of subjects to come and... just relax with me, they take it all too seriously and are still in proper manner of respect.” She drooped her head with a sigh.

I twittled my fingers. “Man... that sucks. I'd lose my mind. I've already got gray hair,” I replied as I stroked my hairdo. I sighed as I realized something. “That's also starting to recede.” It wasn't much but I noticed that my hairline was an inch or so back from what it usually was. I looked to her. “You've either got magical hair that won't die or you're really good at keeping stress away,” I chuckled.

She smiled. “And then there is you,” she said, turning to me with a bright smile as if she hadn't heard a word I said. “You are so... relaxed. At home with yourself, even though I could have you thrown in prison for disrespecting me,” she commented and I rose a brow.

“Yeah... but you're not going to...” I trailed off. “Sorry, if I... disrespected, you. I didn't mean to-” she cut me off.

“I didn't mean you disrespected me as much as you disrespected my authority,” she said then nudged me with her rump. “Thanks,” she thanked me in a hushed tone and I rose a brow.

“For... disrespecting your authority?” I asked and she gave a nod.

“Not entirely. I do wish for you to understand my authority over you but... thank you for just... being yourself around me. It makes me feel... accepted and not simply feared,” she mentioned.

I shrugged then gave her a wink. “Dammit!” I muttered and she cocked her head to the side.

“I'm sorry, did I do something?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Nah, I tried to give you a wink but... yah know,” I said, pointing to my eye patch. She nodded.

“If you wish, I could fix it with magic,” she offered but I immediately shook my head.

“Nah... I would on different circumstances but... it reminds me that I'll go to the extreme for others, even at my own personal expense,” I replied and she smiled before turning to look out to the world.

“It was a heroic thing what you did, if what Discord says is true,” she said but I shook my head.

“Nah... not heroic. Just the right thing,” I replied, brushing away the appraise. “But thanks fer mentioning it,” I gave her a nudge back. We both stood there, leaning on the railing and looking out to the horizon.

“It's strange really,” she said, no longer using a regal tone but a calm and gentle tone. “How far you've come along.” I tilted my upper half so I could look at her with a wondering look.

“Come along?” I asked and she nodded.

“I wasn't sure what to expect really. At first glance I thought you to perhaps be another villain. At second thought I figured perhaps you were... not so much evil as you were angry, confused and afraid,” she mentioned and I nodded.

“Helluva thing to be told you'll never be able to go home. Crushing,” I said and she nodded.

“It's partially why I enlisted Twilight to teach you. She does so well when it comes to friendship,” she mentioned and I nodded as she continued. “And yet, even so, for the longest time you showed not a single care for anything. A little bit for her and Spike due to the fact you consider them family, but otherwise...” she trailed off and let me finish.

“I could've cared less what happened to this world,” I said in a deep tone.

“But now...” she trailed off yet again.

“I'd give it my all. Even if it destroyed every little piece of me. I'd die for this world and then some,” I admitted.

“Strange isn't it? How just a little bit of love and compassion can completely change a pony,” she stated and I nodded. A lone tear trickled down her cheek. “It has been a while since I could really express myself to a friend,” she whispered. I rose an eyebrow.

“You... consider me a... friend?” I asked and she looked to me with a teary smile.

“What else am I to refer to you as? You are definitely not an enemy,” she explained and I nodded in return.

“Fair enough,” I replied. Truth be told, I wasn't going to mind having another friend it's just... well, I figured us to be more like acquaintances then friends. She smiled with a devious look.

“Would you be into doing something... inappropriate?” she asked and I looked to her with a risen brow, a slight smirk on my face as well.

“Depends... what kind of inappropriate?”

* * *

Third person...

Rarity stepped up to a table filled with assortments of treats. She looked and saw a new cake that hadn't been there before. Very graciously, she levitated out a knife and with great finesse, sliced a thin little piece of cake out for herself. As she placed the slice of cake on her plate, she screamed in horror, dropping the cake to the floor. There were bugs inside the cake.

Ponies looked to her with curiosity but before she could say a thing, she realized they were just candy bugs. She let out a relieved sigh.

Elsewhere, Pinkie pulled up a fruit salad and looked at the sugar shaker. With a bright smile, she grabbed it and gave it a little tip to sprinkle some sugar. Instead, the lid came straight off and the entirety of the contents poured out. Pinkie blinked, looking at the mound of of sugar atop the fruit salad then just shrugged and bounced away with her salad in hoof.

In a particular corner, lay a rather large pink cardboard box... one large enough for two. Giggles emitted from the inside before the box lifted slightly then made off inconspicuously. A set of two legs, followed by four hooves walked along in secret, unnoticed to the party community.

Celestia spoke up in a quiet voice. “This is perfect. How'd you think of this?”

“Game,” the man replied as they came to a stop. Nearby stood two royal pegasus guards. “You sure about this one? It's pretty bad,” Burdy whispered but Celestia just nodded.

“It's not as bad as it is mischievous. Come on, it'll be fun. Nopony will know,” she assured him. Very slowly, the box tipped up and Evan snuck out, crouching along and being very secretive.

Celestia had suggested the guards get refreshments as they would most likely need it for the trip back. In turn, they had graciously accepted and went in to get beverages. The man took the two pills Celestia had given him and slipped one into each of their drinks as they grabbed some light food, mostly celery sticks.

Sneaking back over to the box, the duo watched as the royal guards made their way back outside, where the cardboard box went to follow. Suddenly, just as they were about to leave, the bubbly pink mare who'd devised the whole party, leapt in front of them and grabbed at the box to hold it down.

“COOL! TWILIGHT, I THINK ONE OF YOUR PRESENTS IS TRYING TO GET AWAY!” She screamed out.

'! Pinkie!' Burdy thought, Celestia thinking thoughts along the same lines. As ponies looked over to see what the hubbub was about, Pinkie gasped in excitement.

“OOOHHHH! New cake!” she squealed then bounced away to the bug candy cake Celestia and Burdy had planted earlier. The two of them wiped their brows. Celestia checked behind them to make sure nopony was watching.

“Okay, clear, let's go!” the regal princess, now prankster, commanded. The duo slipped out unnoticed by the community and outside where the two pegasus guards stood in near perfect stature, minus the drinks in their hooves which they quickly downed.

The two in the box waited until the sedation drug kicked in and the two guards passed out in a matter of minutes. They both flopped over face first into the dirt. With a giggle, Celestia and Burdy tossed off the cardboard box and dragged the two guards into the royal carriage then positioned them in a most inappropriate pose together.

With that business taken care of, the duo both hopped into the front, leaned back and relaxed without a care in the world. Celestia chuckled to herself. “We best slow down on the pranking. It would be wise not to ruin Twilight Sparkle's birthday,” she commented and Burdy nodded. “Thank you. It has been some time since I have had this much fun,” she thanked the man who just shrugged and smiled back.

In the far off distance lay two figures, one a stallion, the other a human. The stallion lay with his rifle while Kianna dialed in the shot. However, as they saw the princess and Burdy drag the passed out guards in the back, she was struck in confusion.

“Wha... why...” she was baffled. The stallion spoke up.

“I can tag them both, right now, right here... ma'am?” he asked but she shook her head.

“No... no, they must be up to something. Why else would they be so carefree despite their guards being unconscious?” she asked, theorizing several possible answers but coming up with no plausible one.

She bit her lip and went back to her regular paranoia. “I knew it... I knew you were from NATO... but now you're conspiring with this world's government to kill me are you? We'll see about that!” she spat.

The stallion looked briefly to his deranged commander and also mentor. Kianna stroked her hands through her hair. “This guy... he's up to something... I just know it,” she tapped her fingers along the the side of the spotting scope. “Come on, we gotta move before somepony spots us,” she ordered.

As they stood up, she gathered her things then noticed his large endowment hanging out, fully erect. “And for fuck sakes, tuck that thing away before it gets caught on barbwire,” she ordered.

He blushed timidly and did his best to conceal it once more. “Sorry ma'am, was the way I was laying,” he lied...

* * *

Burdy's perspective...

I leaned back in the carriage, snickering with Celestia. We didn't pull off many pranks but like she said, best we stop before we ruin Twilight's birthday.

As I spoke, I rubbed my knuckles while showing her the scars. “Yeah, so in the end the punching bag turned out to be frozen solid with ice. So while I was pounding it I just so happened to cut apart my skin right to the bone and bust my knuckles up some kinda good,” I chuckled and she sighed.

“That's aweful. But why on earth would she threaten to kill your dog like that?” Celestia asked and I shrugged.

“Pardon my French but... because she was a bitch,” I informed her, having told her about when my real mother had threatened to kill my dog because... probably to get a reaction out of me. Celestia leaned back with a deep inhale, then an equally large exhale.

“I never knew my father... nor my mother either. Luna and I were... well, we were alone for the most part of our youth but we took care of each other until we found proper residence.” She tapped her hoof, probably in sadness.

I leaned over and nudged her body with mine. “It's alright... I never really knew my father either. My... uhh... uhm... her, she left with me before I could remember. And it was my grandmother and grandfather who raised me for a little while before I... lived my own life I guess,” I said but before she could speak, I finished. “Because neither of us really grew up properly it molded us into stronger willed people... ponies, whatever. We had to learn quickly about all those little things in life while others got to enjoy a more... love filled life.” She turned away, tears coming to her eyes.

“But I failed my sister. I could not save her from herself and banished her to the moon. Is that really loving?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Dunno... my brother just got away with everything cause he was younger. He once shot the windows out of all the family's trucks with a rifle and I took the blame because... well, it couldn't have been my brother because he's younger... so for several months I was beaten and yelled at and berated... meanwhile he's fuckin sucking on popsicles like a prick. Some time later I finally got him to confess and you know what they do?” I asked and she blinked.

“Well... uhm, they-” I cut her off.

“The fuckin pat him on the shoulder, tell him it's alright cause it's in the past and then yell at me cause I yelled at him to confess,” I told her while throwing up my arms. “I don't know what it would be like to banish a younger sibling to the moon. I didn't really live on the streets with him, grow up together alone then feel like I failed him because I couldn't save him. I don't know what it was like, Celestia, but by god..." A lone tear came to my eye. "I respect you for it,” I told her and she blinked, tears trickling down her cheek.

“You respect me for failing my sister?” she asked but I shook my head.

“What else were you to do? The right decision is never the easiest made. If you had've let her run rampant while you tried to figure out a way to save her, then what?” I asked.

“But the element bearers found a way,” she countered.

“Sometimes... you just... you can't do what needs to be done. You're not good enough but that's what makes us ponies... sometimes we need the help of others and that's okay. It was of your grasp. But what counts is that you did what you could. Putting in the effort, no matter how much it hurt... that's what counted.” I gave her a nod but she still seemed uneasy. “Don't worry. It's in the past now and everything's alright... right?” I assured her. She took a deep breath, held it and finally exhaled.

“Thank you... thank you for listening. I've never said this much about myself to anypony for a long time,” she thanked me. I smiled in return.

“It's what friends are for... right?” She didn't get a chance to answer as Pinkie's voice screamed out to us.

“TWILIGHT'S OPENING PRESENTS!” She screamed in her usual frantically excited voice.

I stepped out of the carriage along with Celestia and we both proceeded inside. Celestia leaned over to speak to me more secretively. “What did you get her?” she asked but I didn't answer immediately.

“What'd you get her?” I asked back.

“A new study book. She loves them.” I bit my lip.

'Wish I had known that.' I twittled my thumbs. “Uhm... she asked me to get her nothing,” I informed Celestia who rose a curious brow. “I'm serious,” I added in. She muttered something to herself that sounded like 'You have much to learn'.

We all stood around while Twilight opened gifts, rather timidly too. Apparently she didn't like being the complete center of attention for things like these, or maybe it was the amount of ponies. She seemed so happy and joyful though, despite most of her gifts being books.

Though I do suppose that's what she liked most in life, reading and studying, so they were suitable gifts. Dash came up and handed her over a mess of tape and wrapping paper. I had a hunch this gift wasn't any sort of book due to the shape... or maybe it was a book and Dash was just horrible at wrapping.

Twilight opened it up and gasped. “Dash, this is a-” but she was cut off by Rainbow herself.

“I know right?! An original collector edition Daring Do outfit from 'Daring Do and the Quest for the Sapphire Stone'!” she squealed. Twilight's eyes went wide for a moment.

“How... how'd you-” but Dash cut her off while brushing a hoof against her chest like a showoff.

“I know ponies. Besides, I'm 20% cooler. Of course I'd get you a totally awesome present like this!” she boasted then hesitated and let out a nervous laugh. “Not that the other presents weren't good too... ah-heh-heh,” she stammered as several ponies rolled their eyes.

Twilight gave her thanks to everypony for the gifts and soon enough, ponies began to depart, some taking with them extra cake and treats. After a short time, only Twilight's main group of friends... also my friends, and Celestia were left. Celestia and Twilight had sparked up a friendly conversation about something rather while the others spoke with each other and I just scratched behind Lassie's ears and cooed sweet things to her.

Our group continued to converse before Rarity brought something up that made Celestia and I give each other faces. “So, Princess Celestia. Should you not be returning to your royal duties? It's getting late... not that we want you to leave,” she asked. Celestia and I gave each other mischievous grins.

Celestia spoke. “Well, not necessarily, no. My sister can handle things in my absence if need be. That and I suggested my guards have a rest before the journey home to Canterlot so they would be fully recuperated for the trip,” she lied.

Just as she said that, the two guards stumbled in the door, armor hanging and partly falling off, eyes saggy, drool hanging from their lips. Everypony went dead silent except the guards. “My... my hinny... Cell-tia,” one of them slurred and Rarity gasped.

One stumbled and fell over, knocking over the berry punch and splashing it all over the ground. Celestia and I both stifled laughs while the others held their hooves to their mouths. The other guard looked to his comrade.

Staggering over, he went to help his friend up but in his disoriented state, he ended up just tripping over him and crashing face first into a pastry table, splattering cake all over his formerly pristine armor.

While the others were simply mortified, Celestia and my face's were nearly beat red as we tried to withhold our laughter. As the two of them frolicked on the ground, I could take no more and burst into laughter. The others looked to me with shocked faces and I hacked and coughed, pretending as if I had something stuck in my throat.

Lassie mingled over and looked face to face with one of the stallions. Sniffing him, she began licking at the icing around his neck. He mumbled incoherent things. Lassie began licking around his cheeks where big clumps of cake were. The stallion reached up, grabbed her head and pulled her in for a tongue kiss. Lassie leapt back with a disgusted face to which Celestia burst into foalish giggles.

Celestia stepped forwards. “Worry not anypony. For I knew this would happen and wished it so. They will not be in any sort of trouble... in fact, I may elect to commend them,” she laughed.

Lassie groaned. “Yech! His mouth tastes like toilet water,” she mentioned only making Celestia giggled more. The regal princess levitated the two indecent guards back out to the carriage before returning.

Celestia and I gave each other props which astounded the others. Celestia waved it off. “Relax. We planned this to happen,” she assured them. After several moments, Rainbow Dash spoke up.

“Twilight, try on that suit I gave you. See if it fits!” she suggested excitedly. Twilight nodded and carefully slipped on the outfit. It looked to fit like a charm. Her wings sprang out from the holes in the sides of the shirt which also seemed to be a perfect fit.

“Wow... this fits perfectly Dash... how'd you know?” she asked but Rainbow just shrugged and waved it off like she was perfect and knew everything.

“Hey, that thing fits so well somepony might think you're actually Daring Do... you know, if you were the right color,” she mentioned. Something in my head clicked and I snapped, gaining everypony's attention.

“Sorry didn't mean to... nevermind. I'll be right back!” I announced then rushed off to my truck. I began rummaging through the back seat trying to find it. “Oh... where the fuck did I... AH-HA! HERE IT IS!” I grabbed the book and held it up like a beacon of hope.

I rushed back inside and handed her the book. “Sorry it's not wrapped.” I turned to Celestia. “Figures I could whip something up, eh?” I chuckled. At first glance, Twilight gave a small depressed sigh.

“Oh, Evan. You didn't really need to get me this. I've already got every story in the ser-” she cut herself off as she took a second look. “Ser... seri... series?...” she stuttered. Dash hovered over and looked at the story as well before gasping loudly, wings springing out and herself falling to the ground. Twilight was speechless.

Dash stood back up, shaking at the knees as Daring's words played in my head. 'It's not much but... well, I figured it might mean something'. I smiled. 'Thanks Daring... it means something,' I thought to myself.

Twilight tried to say something. “Evan... how did you-” but she was cut short by Dash as she leapt up to her hindlegs, grabbed the collar of my shirt and shook me wildly.

“How-did-you-get-that?! Daring Do and The Horned Mountain!” Dash rushed back over to Twilight's side, wide-eyed and baffled. “First edition... hard cover... laminate... even signed by A.K. Yearling!” she squealed like a fan-filly.

My conscious spoke up. 'Avtomat Kalashnikova,'. I shook my head. 'I doubt that's what her first name is,' I thought back. As I looked at Dash, I noticed a striking resemblance to her and Daring. An image flashed in my head of Dash transforming into Daring. I leaned over to Celestia. “Someone's more excited than the birthday filly,” I chuckled and Celestia nodded.

“Truly a well chosen gift,” she appraised and I nodded my thanks. Dash ran over and shook me again.

“How?! How is that possible?! Where'd you get that?! Can you get me one too?!-” Twilight cut her off before Dash could continue interrogating me.

“Dash, relax. If you want... we can all sit down and I'll read it out loud.” Dash spun around, squeezing her cheeks together as she squealed.

“Would you really?!” she asked estatically. Twilight just gave a mildly amused face as she nodded.

“Well sure,” she replied before trotting up to me and planting a kiss on my cheek. “Thanks for the gift. It's amazing,” she commented before planting another kiss on my opposite cheek.

“Anything for you mom,” I replied.

Celestia spoke up. “If you would have me, I would appreciate the hospitality,” she asked, "It would seem my guards are, for the moment, incapable of returning me home.". We all nodded while Tia and I gave each other grins, knowing full well why her guards were incapacitated.

We all sat around while Twilight began to read 'Daring Do and The Horned Mountian'...

Author's Note

So... real life story time. Was reading this article by the RCMP about guns and stuff. Anyway, they write this piece about two SKS rifles seized in a drug bust that included: cocaine, heroin, ecstasy, marijuana... the likes, anyway, they go on to write 'If these assault weapons were to fall into the wrong hands... (It continued on but I stopped reading at that point)

If-they-were-to-fall-into-the-wrong-hands... it seems to me if they were in a crack den that they were already in the wrong hands :ajbemused: or maybe they meant the wrong hands as in the hands of law abiding citizens? :applejackunsure: OR maybe they mean aliens from other worlds? :trollestia: Or-OR MAYBE... Nah, that is ridiculous... cheers eh!

Chapter 45

'Shit, shower, shave... heh, if only it were that easy...'

Burdy's perspective...

I drowsed awake in a distantly familiar setting. Particle board lined the walls. Pinned up to the walls were outdated calendars, some ranging beyond a decade old. I lay sprawled out on a couch that was a foot or two too small for my body length.

An old comforter blanket and bed sheet were tangled around my body along with a very plush pillow I had bought recently. By my improvised bed, stood a small table with an equally small television that I used to play video games.

The smell of sweat made itself known, mostly due to the fact I had worn my shirt and pants to bed then promptly overheated. I lay there, staring at the hideous ceiling and contemplating whether or not to get up.

Suddenly my door was kicked in and... she, stepped in to my room. With a scoff, she started on a rant. “Why the fuck don't you buy a bed?!” she yelled and I just shrugged drowsily. “Oh! Pfft, yeah... cause you're a filthy fucking old man with hygiene issues, I forgot!” she snarled and I just rolled my eyes.

“Oh yeah! Just... fuck you, right?” she asked angrily and I shrugged. “UGH! What the fuck is wrong with you? Just look at this pillow! It's fucking filthy!” She screamed as she yanked the pillow out from under my head.

“Look at all this filth! This pillow used to be blue!” she screamed and I rolled my eyes yet again.

“No... it was always gray. That's the way I bought it a week ago,” I groaned out my reply and she just threw the pillow at the ground before sniffing the air.

“And you have serious body odor problems! The fuck is wrong with you? Don't you shower?!” she screamed and I just sighed.

“Okay... ugh,” I sighed and flicked my forehead in irritation. “I just showered before I went to bed but it was cold so I slipped on a pair of pants and shirt-” she cut me off and began to rant and rave... mostly about useless things that weren't in any way related but somehow made it my fault.

After what turned out to be nearly half an hour, she huffed then slammed my door, nearly hard enough to break the framing. I reached for my pillow which she had thrown on the ground and put it over my head as I let out an exhale which also acted as an annoyed sigh.

I wouldn't be able to fall asleep now, not even if I wanted to. I sniffed the pillow. It didn't smell bad, a little like sweat but a quick wash would change that...

* * *

I awoke soundly and well rested. The memory of my dream quickly fading from thought. I stroked my hands through the rat's nest that was my hair. I also needed a shave... badly too. I was supposed to get one last time I had seen Rarity but... it ended a little differently than what I was expecting.

I sat on the edge of my nice bed. It was comfy... a little cold at night but what could one expect when living in a basement. I wiggled my toes a bit as I stood up and made my way over to my dresser, fetching my pair of matching camouflage pants and jacket.

It had been a while since I wore the jacket and it was a little snug with my larger mass but nothing restrictive. I stretched out then slipped on my eye patch, watch, necklace and a pair of white socks before making my way upstairs.

It was the second of July now, a Wednesday. The last week and a bit I had just wandered around and did nothing worth mentioning. As I walked up the stairs, I noticed I had a bit of a stench to me.

I cursed myself for having put on clean clothes then took note that I needed a shower before starting my day. I quickly made my way to the bathroom and into the shower. I left my clothes in a clumped heap as I dialed the taps in to make the water that perfect soothing temperature.

The moment I stepped in, shivers went down my back as the sudden change in temperature took my senses by surprise, even though I knew full well it was going to be warm. I enjoyed myself briefly, basking in the warmth of the streaming water that beset itself upon me. As the moments passed I stopped standing around and quickly began soaping and scrubbing myself down. In a matter of minutes I was finished.

Satisfied, I turned off the water and went to step out before realizing something. In my morning state, I hadn't thought to grab myself a towel. I bit my lip as I looked across the bathroom to the cupboard that was filled with folded towels.

I was soaked, of course, and would drip water across the floor if I walked. A memory came to mind, the one where Twilight said anything I put my mind to, I could do... which led to a terrible session of myself trying to use a simple levitation spell.

I bit my lip. “Worth a try,” I muttered as I reached my hand out as if to grasp the cupboard door handle. I concentrated but my conscious spoke in and broke my concentration.

'No! Do... or do not, there is no try,' he joked and I gasped and nearly fell forwards, having been so into trying to open the cupboard door.

“Fine...” I trailed off and focused once more, imagining my magic grasp opening the door. At first, nothing happened. I closed my eyes and imagined it opening, as if a gust of wind had blown it open. My arm flexed as I used all my inner strength to open it with my mind.

It took a moment, and a little frustration, but very slowly I pictured the door slowly opening, revealing a pile of folded towels. I opened my eyes with a smile...

My smile quickly turned to a frown as I realized the cupboard was still shut. I groaned but as I did, the door to the washroom swung open. Lassie walked in without realizing I was in here. After a moment passed, she stopped dead in her tracks.

“Whoops! Sorry, didn't think anypony was in here,” she turned casually to leave but I called out to her.

“Wait Lassie! Hold up!” I called back to her and she stopped, her ears perking up as she turned back around. I pointed to the cupboards. “Towel... please?” I asked. She pranced back over, hopped to her hindlegs and retrieved a towel, promptly tossing it over to me.

“You're welcome,” she said with a wink and a smile then proceeded out of the washroom, shutting the door behind her. She stayed just outside the door and called back to me. “Hurry up in there, I gotta tinkle,” she said and I snorted, trying to stifle a laugh.

'Tinkle... who the hay says that?' I unfolded the towel and groaned. “Ugh... Lassie, this is a hoof towel,” I called out but she just laughed back a response.

“So? Just dry off your feet and get yourself another one.” I rolled my eye and mouthed her exact words in an irritated fashion.

I did my best to dry off my feet and ankles then quickly hopped over to the cupboards and retrieved a larger towel. Quickly drying myself off, I slipped on my clothes from before and proceeded out of the washroom, still using the towel to dry out my hair.

Lassie rushed in and locked the door behind her. I walked into the kitchen humming a tune to myself as I pondered what I should have for breakfast. Instead I was answered by the sight of Spike whipping up some fruit salad with a side dish of muffins.

“Mornin',” I greeted and he turned to me. I took a moment to smile, seeing how far his body mass had come from the small plump little dragon I remembered from when I first arrived.

“Hey Evan. Good morning,” he greeted back. I stepped over and looked at the salad. There was an even assortment of everything to which I just snickered. “Uhh... is something wrong?” he asked but I just shook my head.

“Nah...” I trailed off as I reached for a large spoon. “Just made me remember back on my world. We'd get fruit salad in sealed cans... except there'd only ever be... if I was lucky, one cherry in the whole can,” I laughed as I held the spoon. “May I?” I asked and he nodded.

I took a scoopful and downed it. It was pretty fine to say the least. “That's not half bad kid. Hey, you could be a chef or something when you're older,” I gave my compliment to which he nodded happily.

“Oh, cool. Thanks,” he thanked me. I grabbed a bowl and a different serving spoon then scooped myself a plentiful serving. I took a seat and reached for a muffin but Spike called out.

“No wait! Not that one. It's got jewels in it... for me,” he said. I left my hand lingering for just a second as my brain processed what he had said. I withdrew my hand and grabbed another muffin.

As I sat down, Spike sat across from me with a similar bowl of food, except he had a cooler looking muffin. I chuckled. “Man... could you imagine if I had ate that? It would've given me wicked digestion problems,” I laughed and he nodded.

“Oh yeah... that wouldn't be good. I don't know what your stomach is like but dragons have powerful digestive tracks that allow us to eat a lot of things that wouldn't usually be edible,” he said and I laughed as I remembered yet another distant memory.

“You know how you can't really twist off non-twist off bottle caps?” I asked and he nodded. “Well there was this trick right... you put the cap edge against the edge of a desk or something then pop it off... well... I was kinda dumb and gave it too hard of a whack and the neck of the bottle shattered,” I chuckled and Spike just looked at me curiously.

“So anyway, since I had already paid for the darn thing, I figured... might as well drink it anyway-” Spike cut in.

“Glass and all?!” he asked, astonished but I gave a shrug.

“Kinda... I tried using my tongue like a filter to stop the glass... funnier yet, the teacher in the room said I couldn't drink it. So I was trying to coax her into letting me drink it thinking she wouldn't let me drink it just cause I wasn't supposed to drink in class... turns out she was saying I couldn't drink it cause there was glass. But I did anyway,” I replied and Spike's jaw went slack.

“Oh man... that could've ended really badly. I know that ponies can't eat broken glass,” he mentioned and I nodded.

“Yeah... wasn't so bad until a day or two later when I used the washroom... real painful like,” I laughed. Spike was speechless.

“Man... you must be really brave to drink something with broken glass in it,” he mentioned but I shook my head.

“Nah... just really, really, REALLY stupid,” I replied back with a laugh. I took a spoonful of fruit and mouthed it around before downing it. It was really good. And that's saying a lot since most fruit salad just tasted like... fruit salad. Spike and I talked for a little bit while we ate, mostly just gibber-jabber.

Lassie walked into the kitchen and immediately eyed the fruit salad. "Hey, that looks good. Can I have some?" she asked and Spike gave her a nod. I took note that it had been nearly fifteen minutes since she had went into the washroom. “Take long enough to tinkle?” I asked with a risen brow and she just stuck her tongue out.

“Yeah, well it would've went quicker if I had some help,” she commented and I rose a brow in confusion. I had heard the old saying guys say to other guys that it'd be easier if the other holds it but... She just patted me on the shoulder as she passed by to get some fruit salad. “Don't worry about it. It's wayyyyy out of your vocabulary.”

I was dumbstruck but she didn't say anything else as yet another presence entered the room. “Morning everypon-” she cut herself off, realizing rather quickly she was the only pony in the room. “Morning everyone,” she greeted and we all nodded our heads to her.

She trotted over to the counter and looked at the fruit salad. “Did you make this Spike?” she asked and he nodded. She scooped herself a small dish and trotted over to the table before taking a mouthful.

“Mmm... excellent as always, my number one assistant,” she commented. I took a bite out of the muffin and gave him a wink.

“Better than glass,” I chuckled and he smirked. Both Lassie and Twilight looked to me with wondering stares. “Nothing, inside joke,” I replied and Lassie gave a pouty face.

“Awww... I wanna know the joke,” she pouted but I just shook my head.

“It's... it wouldn't be funny if I explained it to you. Besides... it's not all that funny to begin with,” I replied. Lassie took a moment then giggled.

“Oh... ah-ha-ha... oooh... you ate glass before didn't you?” she asked and I just rolled my eyes. Twilight looked to me, brows risen in worry. I just waved it off. I raised a spoon to Spike.

“Grade A stuff man. Five stars,” I told him. Lassie and Twilight both nodded. Spike blushed a little. I took another muffin as I mowed down on the fruit salad. After a short while, Twilight spoke up.

“I was wondering... Evan,” she said, putting emphasis on my name.

“Yes mom?” I asked back and she just sighed.

“Well... I was thinking. I know it's not your style but... maybe you should get a haircut and shave.” I nodded.

“Yeah I know... it's kinda growing into a rat's nest,” I chuckled and she nodded.

“Well... not only that but... I meant a nice haircut and clean shave. You are still going to the gala, right?” she asked and I gave a shrug.

“Yeah... probably. Unless something more urgent comes up,” I replied and she nodded.

“Precisely. The thing is though... The Grand Galloping Gala is very... fancy if you will and... as to not disrespect Celestia in front of the others for having invited you privately, it may be best if you made yourself... a little more respectable. Not that I'm saying you're dirty or anything, just that you'd stick out like a sore tooth,” she told me.

I nodded. “Yeah... I was in need of a haircut and shave anyway,” I replied and she mentioned something else I had been neglecting.

“By chance have you found somepony to go with you yet?” she asked and I bit my tongue.

“Uhm... working on that,” I replied. I quickly finished up and put my dish in the sink. Just before I left, I turned to them with a blank face. “Ah'll be back,” I said in my best Arnie voice.

Lassie called out. “Oh, one more thing,” she said and I turned to her. “I've never been, but I have a feeling it's not some military meet,” she mentioned and I blinked. “Hey, don't get me wrong, it suits you but...” she laughed then rolled her eyes. “You're gonna need something a little more classy than camouflage fatigues or a western duster coat.”

I gave a nod then left. 'What's wrong with my clothes? I like this coat,' I thought silently as I hopped into Cadence. I looked to the instrument panel. “Do you think my coat is out of fashion, Cadence?” I asked as I swiped the naughty key and started the truck. “Yeah, that's what I said.”

With that I drove off to Rarity's boutique. She'd be able to help me... well, with my hair at least. As I drove, I looked to my rear view mirror and scruffled my hair. I would use the sun visor mirror if I had one, but being a four wheel drive truck my visor mirror had been replaced with a warning about how the vehicle operated differently and to refer to the owners manual for further instructions. Useless, would rather have the cool little mirror with lights like the passenger side did.

I pulled the truck up to the side of the boutique and shut her down. I had no idea how long I'd be. I stepped out and gave the truck door a bump with my rump to close it as I walked toward the front door of Rarity's.

I gave a gentle knock but made sure it was audible. Rarity's smooth voice answered. “Come in darling, the door is open,” she called out in her usual luxurious tone. I stepped through the door and made note to take off my boots at the doormat. It looked as if she had just mopped the place.

She turned to see who it was and gasped, pulling a sheet of fabric over herself. “Oh darling it's you! You must really tell me when you're coming over to visit. I'm not even decent,” she said in a flustered tone.

I scratched the side of my nose. “I didn't really... notice. Floor looks nice,” I complimented and she gave a nervous laugh.

“Yes-yes. The floor is clean. Do watch your step darling, it is ever so slippery,” she warned and I nodded. I went to step closer but she waved her hoof at me while still hiding most of her body behind the fabric sheet. “Not a step closer darling. I'm hideous at the moment. I won't allow you to see me in such a way,” she commented. I just stood there, dumbfounded.

“Uhh... well... I mean, if you're busy-” she cut me short.

“Not another word darling. I'll be back before you can shake a leg.” And with that she was off. I shook my leg then looked. She wasn't back yet. I scratched the back of my head, wondering what exactly she had been doing. I stepped over and took a look. It seemed like she had been sewing something together.

As I looked, a little squeaky voice chimed in. “She really likes you, you know.” I turned to see Rarity's younger sister, Sweetiebelle.

“Yeah I uhh... I'm charismatic,” I replied, a little stutter in my voice.

“Charis-what?” she asked and I just shook my head.

“Means ponies tend to like me cause I'm nice,” I informed her and her brow furrowed.

“No, I meant she REALLY likes you,” she said. I paid her no mind for the most part and examined the sewn fabric. It was so well done I could barely tell it had actually been sewn together. “Are you even listening to me?!” she chirped and I nodded.

“Yeah-yeah... likes you, err, me... nice job Rarity,” I muttered to myself and Sweetiebelle gave a 'humph'. I turned to her and ruffled her mane. “Sorry kid, I was caught up in her work. You were saying?” I asked and she rolled her eyes.

“I was saying... never mind, you two were made for each other,” she commented with a somewhat annoyed tone.

I cocked a brow. “Made for each other?” I asked in slight confusion.

She looked back to me with a dumbfounded look. “Are you dumb or something?” she asked but before I could reply with a nod, another pony cut in.

“Sweetiebelle, darling, it is rude to speak to our guest in such a way,” Rarity chimed. She pulled out a bag of bits. “Would you be a dear and fetch me some cider from Applejack?” she asked as she levitated over the bits.

“But we have some downsta-” Rarity cut her short.

“Fresh cider darling, chop-chop,” Rarity instructed. Sweetiebelle gave another flustered and annoyed 'humph' and was about to leave before I cut in.

“Well... if it's any inconvenience I could always just drive over there and pick it up for you. It'd probably be faster that way,” I offered and Sweetiebelle's face brightened up.

“Yeah, he coul-” but Rarity cut her sister short yet again.

“Nonsense darling, I wouldn't make you go out of your way just for me,” she chimed and shooed her sister away, locking the door behind her.

“Well... uhh... I was-” but Rarity cut me off.

“No-no darling, it's nothing, believe me.” She swung her head to one side, swishing her mane as she did so. With that, she fluttered her eyes at me and I realized she had a lot of makeup on. “To what do I owe the honor darling?” she asked and I just blinked, sort of caught up in her stunning look.

“Uhh... I uhm...” I stammered. She was kind of really pretty like this.

“You like it?” she asked and I realized my jaw was slack, mouth gaping a bit.

“Uhm... you look purty,” I bumbled out. I quickly bit my lip and shook my head. “Uhm, ahem... yeah, you like nice Rarity. The eye liner really brings out your eyes and the... uhh... uhm, cheek powder stuff really brings out the complexity of your mane... I think,” I replied and she rose a brow.

“Darling, I had no idea you were one with cosmetics,” she said in an impressed tone but I shook my head.

“Nah... I'm an all natural kind of guy. I don't bother with makeup and accessories,” I told her then snapped. “But... uhm, I was kind of wondering... if you weren't too busy...” I trailed off, looking back to her sewing machine and half finished... maybe it wasn't even half finished... whatever it was.

“I'm not doing anything at the moment actually,” she replied and I looked again to the... dress, I'll call it.

“Well... uhm... I was gonna say, nice dress. I don't really want to take up your-” she cut me off as she moved the sewing machine and fabric aside. With that, she lay across the table in a most peculiar way.

“Nonsense darling, it was just something I was playing around with. A doodle if you will. Now... what do you have on your mind?” she asked, leaning her cheek into one of her supporting fore hooves and crossing her hindlegs.

“Uhm... well... I uhh...” I trailed off as I saw her free hoof move down her side. Without turning my head, I watched her hoof sliding down her hindlegs in the strangest of ways. I scratched the back of my ear. “I was gonna ask for a haircut,” I replied blankly.

With that said, she gasped and lost her balance. I reached my hands out in natural reflex and caught her as she fell. I cradled her in my arms for a moment, a look of pure astonishment spread across her face.

“A-a-a... a hair-aircut?” she stammered. I set her down to all fours. She stumbled around as if about to faint.

“Well... I mean... yeah, if you're not too busy...” I trailed off, waiting for her to pick up.

“Just a haircut... that's all? Nothing else?” she asked, baffled.

I rubbed my beard. “Uhm... and a shave, if it's not too much to ask,” I asked. She took a moment to get herself together from a... a panic attack?

She wiped her mane to one side. “I-I-I su-supose if that's 'all' you wanted... I could lend a helping hoof.” Her horn lit up and she levitated over some shaving utensils. I took a seat in the barber chair and she wrapped the bib across my neck. “How do you want it darling?”

I rubbed my chin. “Uhm... well uhh... I kinda need to look nice. Well, not just nice. I need to look... uhm...” I trailed off as I twitched my lip, trying to find the word I was looking for.

“Stunning?” she asked and I tossed my head from side to side.

“I'm supposed to not stand out when I go to the gala,” I replied and she gasped, stepping around and in front of me.

“The gala? As in, The Grand Galloping Gala?” she asked in astonishment. I nodded. “You were invited?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Yeah. Celestia sent me an invitation,” I said casually, not really caring about it at the moment.

“Celestia herself gave you a private invitation to The Grand Galloping Gala?!” Rarity asked in complete and utter shock. I just stroked my hair as I looked in the mirror, wondering what look I should sport. I really just wanted the traditional flattop look again.

“Yeah... well, really, she didn't give me a private invitation... just an invitation. Two actually. I'm supposed to bring a good friend but... well, Twilight has things and stuff to do, Pinkie... didn't want to? And Lassie probably wouldn't be able to go. I was-” she cut me short and swung her mane to one side with a bash of her eyes.

“What about me darling?” she asked and I blinked.

“Well... yeah, I guess that would work. You seem like the high society party goer. And you are my friend, right? So... huh, I never even thought of that,” I muttered and she gave a slight frown.

“You didn't even consider me when you were looking for friends to go with you?” she asked but I shook my head.

“No-no, what I meant was I never thought of that cause I didn't give it much thought lately... at all actually. I wasn't going to go originally but I was persuaded to go due to the fact it might be disrespectful to Celestia since she had requested me personally. Not like I had anything to do either so... heh, my brother's birthday was on the forth of July actually,” I chuckled, beginning to ramble but Rarity didn't pay much mind to my useless ramblings.

She swung around to my rear side, leaning in close and looking to my reflection in the mirror. “Oh darling, just think of it. You and I at the gala together, dressed in top of the line outfits, hoof in hoo... hoof in hand, we'll be the center of everypony's attention...” she began to ramble on and said something about how it would show that stinking, arrogant, self righteous blue blood... the hell was a blue blood? Wasn't that like... some kind of slang for British people?

With that, she began to cut and snip my hair, slicing it down further than I'd like. Then she began to comb my hair in a 50s gentleman haircut, with my hair slicked to one side. Before I knew it she began a clean shave on my beard and mustache that had grown out over the past month and a bit.

She dabbed my neck with aftershave and sprayed some liquid from a squirt bottle on my hair before spinning me around, twirling my body over to a dressing stand. “What shall it be darling: rose red tuxedo, tailored suit, vest and-” I cut her off.

“Can I have a plaid shirt with red and green suspenders?” I asked bluntly and her face went pale.

“Darling, you can't be serious...” she trailed off but when I didn't answer she gave a shudder. “Eww... that would look disastrous... uhm, not that's there's anything wrong with your choice in clothing darling but we need to look the part...” she trailed off with a high note and I just knew, gut feeling, this was going to end with a musical of some sort.

She started off by singing about style. I rolled my eye. 'Yeah... musical... figures,' I thought silently to myself but before I could think about anything else I was yanked off my feet and held upside down in the air. “WOAH, EH!” I yelped but before I could do anything else, she continued to sing and my belt was unstrapped and flicked off, quickly followed by my jeans. “EH!” I called out as I was quickly stripped, my clothes tossed onto my boots by the front door.

Left in nothing but my boxer briefs I called out to Rarity. “Hey, do you mind?” I asked, feeling exposed. She paid my discomfort no real mind as she gently set me down, still singing about stylish trousers.

I tossed my hands up in defeat. I guess I'd just have to roll with it for now. Before I could say much of anything, she hopped up to her hindlegs and took my hands with her hooves and began dancing around with me in a classy fashion.

I was about to say something before she kicked my legs out from under me but held me airborne with her magic as she slipped a pair of black suit pants on my legs. They were a bit short and ended a little higher than what I'd like but I never got a chance to complain as she set me back down and began to dance with me again.

“You know... Rarity, I'm not much of a-” but she cut me off as she yet again kicked my feet out from under me, this time fitting a pair of snazzy buckle shoes on my feet. There were really tight and felt horrible, scrunching my toes to a nearly painful point... but then again, they probably weren't meant for a human.

I was set down again and we began to dance, a classic music tune playing in the background that matched her voice. 'Goddess dammit, how do these ponies just randomly break down into musicals at the drop of a hoof?' I wondered to myself.

We began dancing around and my feet began to stumble do to the pain in my feet. As I staggered about, she twirled me into a spin and before I knew it, a fine shirt was slipped onto my body and all the buttons were done up just before a fine, slim, black tie was put on.

I tried to squirm to get a better fit but found it was also uncomfortably tight. “Rairty, it's-” but I was cut off as a black suit vest was tightened onto my body, pulling in rather tight around my stomach region and restricting my breathing. “Eh!” I gasped but was swept off my feet by the dancing and singing mare. Rather than hold both my hands, she held just my right while laying her spare hoof against my chest.

With a bash of her eyes, she gazed upon me with what one would consider 'bedroom' eyes. “Darling, has anypony ever told you your eyes are captivating?” My heart skipped a beat as I blushed timidly.

“Uhm... ah-heh-heh... uhm, thanks... you have... uhm-” I got choked up on words as I stammered shyly. I was never really ready to be complimented like this. Before I could bumble out another syllable, a finely made suit jacket was slipped on but again, it was too tight for my liking.

A little flower was hooked into the chest pocket. Rarity pulled me close. “Darling, the suit really does brings out your stunning complexion,” she cooed. I was at a loss of words. Suddenly the seams in the pants gave out along with the sewing in the suit and before either of us could say anything, the tightly fit uniform had reached its stress limit and simply fell into shreds.

Rarity sighed. “Oh darling, must you be so devilishly large?” She bit her lip and thought to herself. “IDEEEEEA!” she chimed and zipped off. I went to say something but she was back in a flash with a line of measuring tape. Goddess, I can't even keep up with her.

She began to measure my every curve, and sometimes taking longer than she should while measuring my more... private region. Before long she was doing the finishing measurements. Strapping the measuring line around my biceps, she looked at me. “Darling, could you flex your muscles for me?” she asked and I cocked an eyebrow. “So I can make your suit to accommodate,” she informed me.

I gave it my best, flexing as hard as I could. My skin stretched as the muscles along my entire arm expanded slightly. Veins made themselves known as they bulged out slightly. Rarity bit her lip with a somewhat dreamy look. “Oh my... you have such a wonderful physique... but I'm sure all the mares say that,” she sighed. I blushed heavily. I was really not used to being complimented.

“Uhm... ahh... heh-heh... uhm, no... actually, nopony ever really sees me like this,” I replied, sweeping off the excess shreds of clothing that still remained on my body. I was left with a torn pair of pants that now looked like shorts. Rarity had been kind enough to remove the overly tight footwear while she was measuring my body. I kinda looked like the hulk in a way, just a pair of ripped shorts.

“Nopony has ever seen you like this?” she chimed and I rubbed the back of my head.

“Well... I mean... my mom does but... I mean, I live there so there's the odd time I walk around with just some boxers,” I partially lied. I don't think it'd be good to say she'd seen me all the way naked plus the reasoning behind that.

Rarity exhaled while using her right hoof like a fan. “Oh sweet Celestia... what I'd give to be there,” she sighed.

“Be where?” I asked, puzzled. “Like... at the library? I think you can come over whenever... I mean, I guess not in the middle of the night but-” she cut me off as she hopped to her hindlegs, placing a hoof against my mouth.

“Hush now darling, not another word,” she whispered to me. She began to caress my sides with her hooves, feeling every curve of my upper body. It made me shiver in slight delight. I never really had people ogle over my body and I didn't really enjoy it but at the same time I didn't not like it... but this, I kind of enjoyed this a little.

After a few minutes of her lying her head against my chest and rocking into me, I spoke. “Uhm... can I get my clothes now?” I asked hesitantly. She was taken out of her... trance? She looked to me with shocked eyes.

I rubbed the back of my head with a slightly hesitant chuckle. “Well... ah-ha-ha... I mean, it's nice and all but... I'd kinda like to have my clothes on again,” I informed her. She shook off whatever state of mind she had been in and nodded quickly, bringing over all my clothes with her magic.

“Here you are darling. I'm sorry, I... I don't know what came over me,” she apologized but I just shrugged and gave her a nudge.

“Don't worry, we all space out sometimes,” I assured her while slipping on my clothes. She levitated over a teapot with cups and brought me over to a small table.

“Here darling, take a load off. I'll just write down the measurements for later and I'll be right back.” With that she was off, leaving me with some tea and biscuits. I poured myself a glass and took a biscuit, which was actually some kind of shortbread cookie.

As I was chomping down on the cookie, I heard the irritated growl of a feline. I turned and looked down, only to see Rarity's angry white cat. It had an ugly purple bow-tie holding up its hair and an equally hideous collar.

'Goddess I hate cats,' I thought silently as I broke off a piece of my cookie. Making a squeaky kissing noise, I offered the cat the morsel of food which at first it turned its nose up. I shrugged and just tossed the piece of food to the floor then continued to mind my business.

Before I knew it, the cat was rubbing against my leg, purring lightly. I looked down and saw tiny crumbs around its mouth. I gave a chuckle then broke off another treat and handed it to the cat. This time it ate right out of my hand.

With that, the cat leapt right up into my lap and began to purr loudly as it nestled in. I smiled darkly. “Next time Gadget, next time!” I said darkly. With a chuckle I fed the cat another morsel of shortbread then began to sip my tea as I stroked the cat like I was some evil mastermind.

My conscious spoke up in a reminisce of Emperor Palpatine. 'Goooood'. I couldn't help but to chuckle a bit as I fed yet another piece to the cat who continued to purr.

After a short while Rarity returned. As she approached, a smile came across her face. “Oh Opal, it seems you've made a new friend,” she said with great enthusiasm. Going to pet her prized cat, the feline instead hissed at her. Swinging its claws, the cat sliced off a lock of Rarity's mane before growling in an annoyed tone.

Rarity gave a forced cough. “Ahem... yes well... I suppose perhaps you don't wish to be disturbed. I'll just... leave you to it,” Rarity said as she sat across from me. The cat swung it's head away from her, eyes closed as it leaned into me, beginning to purr once more. “Well... I never knew you were so good with animals. Did Fluttershy teach you?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Nah. I'm a henchman. It's like... rule of law that henchman have cats... err, actually... I guess it's the head crime boss that always has the cat. Anyway, it's like... law that these sorts of cats are supposed to sit on my lap... ah-haha,” I chuckled whilst stroking Opal.

“I see. I never knew that,” she replied but I shook my head.

“Nah, I'm just kidding. I dunno. Just a natural knack for it. Dairy farmer in my younger days so I had a lot of interaction with animals. Not just cattle either,” I replied as I broke off another piece of food for the cat.

“UGH! You shouldn't feed that to Opal. She'll get fat!” Rarity gasped but the cat instead growled and hissed at her, swinging its sharp claws in her direction. Rarity bit her lip and leaned back in her seat, despite being far out of reach from the cat. “Well... that is to say... I suppose a small piece would be okay,” she said with a slight chuckle.

With that the cat in mention graciously took the food from my hand, the whole cookie at that. I lifted my tea cup to my lips and took a gentle sip then swished it around before downing it. It was still hot so I gave a gentle blow to the surface of the beverage.

“So darling... tell me. What made you want to exercise so... vigorously and achieve the physique you have now?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“Several things really. I used to do small time body building back when I was in high school. I liked being healthy but I didn't really go to the extreme cause... well, I just didn't have the time really. But when I got zapped here, I didn't really have anything to do... or rather, I didn't want to do anything because... I dunno, this world... I just thought it was all so stupid,” I told her and she bit her lip.

“You thought it was stupid?” she asked and I nodded.

“Well, you have to know that I came from a very different world so this one was an extreme in the opposite direction. Everypony for the most part was kind, there's a whole bunch of beautiful scenery, the world is gentle and loving and filled with...” I trailed off and didn't bother continuing with all the differences in this world. “To me it was too much to take in so I just hid in Twilight's basement. Being a recluse at the time, I could think of nothing better than to exercise so... I did just that.” I thought back to it. I was so brash, arrogant and hotheaded back then and I sort of wish I could take it all back.

“What was your inspiration darling? To start I mean?” she asked and the answer was as simple as it got.

“Arnold Schwarzenegger,” I replied and she cocked a brow. “Back on my world he was... a legend...” I trailed off and smiled, putting on my best Arnie face. “Not every legend is a myth. Some are flesh an' blood. Some legends walk among us. But... dey aren't born, dey're built...” I trailed off, realizing I had forgotten the rest of his quote. Rarity was still looking at me with a puzzled look. “It's just a quote of his... I swear though, when I thought I was done... when I couldn't lift another weight cause I was so exhausted... if I just thought about that, that one quote... I could do at least on more set of whatever workout I was on. Arnold was... is my idol. Someone I aspire to be like. To rise from nearly nothing and become something... but... bah, it's a fading dream,” I replied. Opal purred and I looked to the empty dish where the cookies once lay.

I gave her an attentive rub. “Sorry buddy, all out,” I told the cat. She gave an annoyed 'Mow!' and hopped off my lap, walking over and cuddling into a posh little bed in the corner of the room. Rarity put her hooves across the table and held my hands.

“Darling, never give up on your dreams,” she told me. I just shrugged.

“It's not like I've just given up on them and now I'm just sitting on the couch at home. It's just... well, I started getting out in the world and my life gets pretty busy at times so... it's on hold,” I told her with a smile. She rubbed my hand.

“Well darling, I must say, for not having reached you dream just yet, you have a quite impressive build as it is,” she commented and I couldn't help but to blush.

“Thanks Rarity... it means a lot. How about you?” I asked and she looked to me with an estranged look. “What made you pursue a life of... fashion?” I asked and she shrugged.

“Oh nothing really... I always wanted to be a fashionista since I was little but it was when I was building dresses for the school play...” she trailed off into a somewhat detailed short story about how she was building dresses when she was younger. It ended with her horn somehow dragging her out to a rock that subsequently was filled with gems that she later used to put a real finesse on the dresses for the school play.

When she finished the story she turned slightly and showed me her flank. “And that is how I got my cutie mark,” she informed me. I blinked.

“Wow... that's clever. It's like something right out of a fairy tale... man Rarity, that's pretty awesome,” I told her and she smiled.

“Well... I prefer to think of it as classy. Awesome is more Rainbow Dash's thing.” I just sat there and smiled. She rose a brow and turned my hand over, taking a look at my palms. “Darling, have you ever had your version of a hoof pedicure?” she asked but I shook my head. Manicures weren't my thing as long nails tended to bend and break when living a lifestyle like mine.

“Uhh... no, it was never really my thing.” I withdrew my hand and rubbed them together attentively.

“Well perhaps darling, we should bring you to the spa for a proper treatment. It's only right considering you'll be a royal guest at The Grand Galloping Gala,” she mentioned. I was about to say something but she grabbed me off my feet and began pulling me along.

“Hey wait! My tea,” I called out but she disregarded my comment.

“Nonsense darling. There will be refreshments at the spa. Come, we must hurry. This is an emergency!” she chimed as I was pulled out the doorway, barely having time to sling on my boots. I was going to take the truck but she hurried us right past Cadence.

“You know... if you want we can just take- GAH!” I cut myself off as I ducked under a low street sign. “MY TRUCK!” I gasped as she pulled me around a corner, galloping along.

“It's alright darling. It's just around this corner,” she dragged me around another corner and to the front steps of a wacky looking building. It had pointed roofs and steep slopes that angled up again at the bottom. It looked like some crazy carnival tent actually.

Stepping in we both approached what I supposed was the receptionist area. There were two mares of near identical look. The major and obvious difference was their swapped color. One was pink with a light blue mane while the other was light blue with a pink mane.

'They must be twins,' my conscious spoke up and I nodded. Rarity stepped up and began to speak to them and that's when a second realization hit me. These mares were French... 'I wonder if they're Parisian?' my conscious again spoke up.

Rarity's voice cut into my thoughts. “Yes, he needs the works, full service. He's never been looked after by professionals and his skin is terribly worn,” Rarity told them. I frowned and looked to my skin, giving my forearm an attentive rub.

Sure my skin wasn't super smooth but it wasn't coarse like gravel either. I also noticed my forearm hair had grown out quite a fair bit. Not to the point that I couldn't see my skin underneath but it was getting thick. The pink one nodded.

“I'll take this one,” she said in a spookishly stereotypical French accent. She was so fluent I doubt she was putting on an act but... I mean stereotypes are funny but I didn't think I'd ever meet a true honest to goddess pony with a thick French accent like this.

With that she stepped forward. “Please, follow me.” She led me into another room and sat me down in a barber chair.

“I already had a haircut...” I said with uncertainty in my tone. I had no idea what spas did. She didn't directly answer my question and just nodded.

“Sssh... relax, you are in my care now,” she told me and I was still puzzled with her accent.

Leaning my head back, she dipped my hair into a basin full of... water I think. I wasn't quite sure about all this. Before I could say anything, she lay a lukewarm cloth over my eyes and forehead.

“Uhm...” I trailed off but again she hushed me. I heard the click of a button and some quiet musical note played. In the background of the music were birds chirping.

“Relax and be calm with yourself,” she said. With the damp cloth over my face, everything was dark. I fiddled with my hands and just lay there for... a while. Nothing really happened and from time to time a vision of a tropical jungle seemed to flow through my mind.

I didn't really notice but the pink spa pony was playing with my face, rubbing it with silky wet clothes. I thought to myself about spas in general. A sudden and horrendous thought came to mind as I remembered some of the mythology behind Asian nomenclature of spa.

In an instant I sat up with a gasp. “I DON'T DO ACUPUNCTURE!” I gasped wildly. She was taken back in shock as I was breathing heavily. I looked to her, breathing steadily with deep breaths. “Sorry... I uhh... I got caught up in... please, no needles,” I breathed in heavy huffs and she sighed, laying me back down.

“Yes, I understand. Though I was not going to use acupuncture anyway if that's any assurance,” she told me and I was yet again set in peace. Before long, she was lifting my head up and wrapping it in a towel. I went to touch it but she pulled my hand away.

“Please... leave the towel be,” she ordered as she led me to yet another room. We stopped in a more private area with a tub full of... mud? I hope it was mud. It didn't smell bad so I think it was mud.

She looked to me and I looked to her. There was a long silence. “Can you please remove your clothing?” she asked and I did as obliged, removing everything but my underwear and leaving a crumpled pile on top of my boots along with my necklace, watch and eye patch.

I kept my bad eye closed as to save her the horror of seeing it. I waited for a moment for further instructions. She hummed to herself in an amused way. “All of them, please,” she told me and I bit my lip.

“Uhm... uhh... all?” I asked hesitantly. She nodded and I looked around. “Why? Do I have to?” I asked and she sighed.

“We do not clean clothes,” she mentioned and that's when I realized I was probably gonna end up in that soupy brown stuff. I waited hesitantly.

“Uhm...” I began to tiptoe on the spot in an uncomfortable manner. She cocked a brow. “Well... I mean, can I get some privacy?” I asked.

“For what?” she asked. I looked to her with wide eyes then it hit me but at the same time she must have made a similar realization of sorts. “Oh I apologize. You must be one of the ones who like to where clothes at all times,” she said while I began to blurt out something of similar fashion. I paused for a moment then nodded.

“Uhh... yeah, something like that.” She nodded and put a hoof over her eyes.

“It is okay, undress and I will not peak,” she assured me. I slipped off my undies and covered my crotch with both hands.

“Uhm... okay what do I do now?” I asked and she took her hoof away from her eyes then led me to the side of the tub.

“Sit, relax. It will smooth your skin,” she informed me and I sat down in the... it was mud?! Well, not your typical run of the line mud. It was nice, smooth, runny mud but it was still just... mud! Again she put on nice relaxing music and went to leave. I called out to her.

"Uhh... can I have something to drink... please?" I asked and she nodded. Shortly thereafter she returned with a bottle filled with something. I looked at it. There was pulp of some kind. "Uhm... what is it?" I asked.

"Aloe vera water. Good for you," she replied and my face went pale.

"Aloe vera as in... like sunscreen?" I asked and she giggled.

"Mmm, no-no. Not Aloe vera cream, Aloe vera water. Natural and good for you. Tastes good too," she said. I shook the bottle and took a sip. Interestingly enough it did have a very good taste to it too. It was sweet but in a different kind of way. With that she left me to myself

I blinked and was completely dumbfounded. I set the bottle aside and began thinking about the mud bath instead. How the hell does mud smooth your skin? Maybe it cleans it and... oh I dunno. I began to flop my hands around in the mud in simple play. At first I was bored but then I realized if I was careful enough, I could draw pictures on the surface of the mud without it rippling and distorting the image. “Heehee... ah-haha...” I giggled to myself but just as I was starting to have fun, the pink spa pony returned.

I blinked for a moment and she motioned for me to step out. 'Ugh... and just when I found something amusing to do,' I thought to myself as I stepped out. She led me to another room where she washed me off before putting me in a bubbly spa pool.

I felt so uncomfortable when my private areas were exposed. As I sat down, she leaned in to whisper into my ear. “You do not have to be sooo... timid.” I blinked and looked to her. She walked around to the other side of the pool and sat on her rump, dipping the tips of her hooves in the water.

“Timid?” I asked and she nodded.

“It is okay. Ponies walk naked all the time,” she informed me and I sunk my head down so my nose was just barely above the water level. She giggled. “Have you never been naked around others?” she asked and I nodded. “So why so shy around me?” I lifted my head.

“Because you're not a football player and we're not in the football change room,” I mumbled. She laughed.

“Well... perhaps imagine I am a... ball player and we are in the change room together,” she offered.

“It's hard when I'm talking to a pink female pony like yourself and not a jockish human like me... no offense,” I told her. She smiled and swung her mane to one side.

“In that case then... would you mind if I join you?” She asked and before I could answer she took off her necklace and headband before stepping into the tub with me and taking a seat. “There... now we are both completely naked, no?” I had no idea how she thought that would make it any better.

I blinked in confusion. Wasn't she supposed to be... doing spa pony stuff? Not relaxing on the job... “Ahaha...” I chuckled and she rose a brow. “Oh nothing... just remembering back on the farm I used to work at,” I told her and she stayed silent, obviously to let me continue my story.

“I used to get tired at work, fourteen hours a day, no rest except a fifteen to half hour lunch break. So near the end of the day I'd get tired and want to take a nap before the final few hours so I'd sit down in a chair in the office and take a short nap... heh, the cats used to all huddle up in a ball on my chest as I leaned back. Sometimes I'd twitch and kick in my sleep but they wouldn't mind, they were just happy to be somewhere warm,” I informed her.

“Are you saying I remind you of yourself because you think I sleep on the job?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Nothing wrong with a bit of relaxation... huh, though it must be nice being a spa pony. You can just chill with you clients,” I said with a smirk and she sighed.

“If only it was that easy. We must always act professional around our clients,” she mentioned and I rose a brow.

“So how am I different?” I asked and she shrugged.

“You seem to be the type of pony who would be less concerned if I relaxed a bit around you,” she told me and I nodded.

“You read ponies pretty well... I think,” I replied and she smiled.

“Serving enough ponies over the years, one gets to know a pony's mood habit by their actions and choice of words... you seem laid back in life yet for some reason also troubled by many things,” she told me and I rose a brow.

“Wow... you are good. Anything else?” I asked and she nodded.

“I give a good back massage,” she said and we both laughed together. “So how about you? You... do competitions no?” she asked but I shook my head. “Hmm... I figured such a healthy physique, you would do competitions.” I shook my head.

“Maybe one day...” 'Legends are made from iron and sweat, mind and muscle, blood and vision... and victory. Legends are champions. Dey grow... Dey win... Dey conquer,' some more of Arnold's inspirational quote emerged itself in my thoughts. “Yeah... that'd be awesome,” I said, mostly to myself.

I began to screw around with the bubbles and play with them as the pink pony just laid back and relaxed, soaking her hair and rubbing her shoulders attentively. We spoke and chit chatted about useless things as we both sat in the tub. “Say... what's your name anyways?” I asked.

“Aloe,” she replied and I nodded.

“Nice name,” I replied.

“And yours?” she asked.

“Burdick... Evan Burdick. But yah can call me Burdy if yah fancy,” I told her and she rose a brow.

“Burdy?” she asked.

“Nickname back in football,” I replied. She nodded before promptly standing up, water dripping off her fur and mane.

“I do believe if we stay here much longer, your skin will begin to wrinkle,” she commented and I took notice that indeed my skin had pruned. She and I stepped out and I promptly wiped off the excess water and bubbles that still clung to my body.

She shook like a dog and her mane drooped to one side, straightened by the water. She tossed me a towel which I used to quickly dry off before tossing it over my shoulder. “You're not... shy about being naked around me?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Nah... it's a spa, and you're just relaxing at work so... it's like being in the change room,” I replied. She smiled as we went into another room. Inside was a flat looking table with a cover over it.

“When you're ready, lay face down” she offered and I quickly obliged. It wasn't the most comfortable thing ever but I quickly settled in and she began to rub and push her hooves against my back and shoulders.

At first it was weird but I slowly became accustomed to it. “Oooh... your body is so tight... so tense. You must be burdened constantly,” she mentioned but I shook my head.

“No... ahh... I get around... oooh... man that feels good,” I grunted and I heard her laugh.

“Good at back massage, no?” she giggled and I just let out a single chuckle. She rubbed at the sides of my ribs and down along my hips, even the backs of my legs. I quickly realized that my body felt loose and flexible.

She began up at my neck again and continued to massage me in all the right places in just the right way. I let out a comforted sigh. 'Man... I could get used to this,' I thought to myself. Only now did I realize she had that soothing jungle sound music playing.

There were scented candles that left a most peculiar lingering aroma. As she worked on my hips and buttocks region I realized something rather grave. I gulped deeply, hoping it was just the way I was lying. I thought about it for a second and gave it a flex then groaned inwardly.

I had a massive erection. “Oh shit...” I whispered to myself under my breath. Aloe continued her massage then stopped to speak.

“If you would please, turn over to your back,” she told me and I bit my lip.

“Uhm... I uhh... can I not?” I asked and there was a pause. I prayed to god she didn't look between my legs. There was no way she could miss it if she did. She leaned down and exhaled on the back of my neck, making me flinch slightly.

In the most hushed tone, she spoke right into my ear. “Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?” she asked and my eyes went wide as I looked side to side. In my mind I puzzled together everything I could.

'Ugh... okay... hold on...' I thought to myself but she instead giggled and trailed her hoof up the inside of my leg, dangerously close to my erection as she spoke again. “Vous ne parlez pas français. Ooooh, trop mauvais,” she giggled as she stroked the insides of my thigh. My eyes darted, I needed to think fast before she realized it was there.

Before I knew it, my mouth was jabbering out words I didn't even know the meaning to. “Uhh... Je ne suis... pas très fatiguée,” I spat out and my eyes went wider. 'The fuck did I just say?' I thought to myself but my conscious returned with an answer. 'Don't worry about it.'

I looked to Aloe who had an absolutely mortified look on her face. “Y-y-you... speak français?” she asked in a stunned tone. I didn't even tell myself to react but my shoulders shrugged.

Using my right thumb and index finger, I motioned as if I was indicating something small. “Très peu... uhh, malheureusement.” The words came out without me even thinking. She was baffled even more than I was.

“I-I-I... I apologize.” She was shaking a little. I just rolled my eye. “I should not have...” she trailed off.

“I dunno what just happened but uhh... I guess maybe we could both forget it even happened at all?” I offered and she nodded.

“Please-please. I should not be so flirtatious, especially with my clients,” she spoke apologetically and I was still baffled. The hell just happened? Before I could think any further, my erection started to pulse a bit and a most primal instinct started to take over. I started getting a bit horny. I was turned over and my erection came into full view though she didn't seem to give it any notice as she began massaging me once again.

“Uh-oh,” I muttered and she continued. The scent in here... it was invigorating. The way she rubbed me... it was so... debilitating. As she continued the massage I felt tingly little feelings running down my body. I just wanted to... I clenched my eyes shut but her voice broke my concentration.

“But... on a completely different setting... do you find me attractive?” Aloe asked out of the blue. I gulped. Part of me was twitching and wanting to have sex, the other part of me wanted to end this all together and run away.

“Sss... fff... I...” I took a large, very audible, inhale. “Ugh... mpgh... uhm...” I gasped as I exhaled. It was so frustrating to keep my urges in check. 'The hell are you doing?! RUN!' My conscious spoke. Huh... funny, last time I was in this state of mind he was the horny one.

“Are you okay?” Aloe asked worriedly. “I haven't hurt you, have I?” she asked, her cute accent all the cuter now that I was the way I was.

I shook my head. “Ffffine,” I replied then bit my lip hard. The way she touched me was exhilarating but at the same time it made my heart thump and pump adrenaline through my veins as though I were doing something wrong and could get caught.

Eventually, finally, she ceased with her unbelievable massage. She leaned down to whisper to me again. “Rarity told me to give you the 'full' service... if you would like?” she asked and I exhaled deeply. How much more was there to give? Whatever was happening, I was ready to just get down with the closest mare and rut... dammit!

“Uhh... well gee... uhm... I mean,” my hands were shaking, clenched as I tried to control myself. “I feel pretty good as it is, you sure that wasn't the full service?” I asked stammeringly then remembered watching movies with spas. There was that room... “Say... you got a sauna?” I asked and she nodded. With that she stood me up and led me to another room, all the while I walked cross-legged to try and hide my distracting erection. There was a large wooden door with a small window to peak through. She opened the door and let me through. She gave me a nod and with that, left me to my much needed privacy.

It was steamy and muggy in this place. I flopped down on my ass and gulped deeply. I wouldn't usually resort to jerking off but this was just too much. “Oh man... what the hell happened?” I asked myself as I quickly started stroking myself. I jerked myself quickly in hopes to be rid of the cursed erection sooner rather than later.

One thing I didn't think about is that while I started beating off, my body temperature began to rise. Coupled with the already heated sauna, I quickly baked myself out. Sweat poured down my face, down my arms, down my legs and even between the crack of my arse.

My hands felt balmy and slick. After just minutes I realized this was an awful plan and a downright failure. Just as I was about to give up, the door to the room swung open and Rarity trotted in. I let out a shy gasp and tried my best to conceal my problem.

Rarity took little notice and closed the door behind herself, tossing her own towel to one side and standing across the room. “May I join you darling?” she asked and I prayed to goddess she didn't mean masturbating... or did I? FUCK!

“Uhh... uhh I-I-I... guess?” I stammered, heart still pounding in my chest. She stepped across and sat on the bench nearby, laying herself down in a most particular pose.

“Isn't the spa just wonderful darling?” she asked, partially rhetorically.

“Uhh, y-y-yeah it's pretty... something else... uhm, really good,” I blurted out, chest thumping. Dammit... what made me like this... was it the way Aloe was touching me? No... no it couldn't have been. I thought back...

'Uhh... those damn candles!' I thought to myself. Ever since I had come in, I had been enticed and invigorated by the scent they gave off. 'Must be like some kind of aphrodisiac.'

Rarity sighed as she stroked one of her hooves up her thigh. “Oh yes, I do so love the spa. The sisters really are something, are they not?” she asked. I had only met the one and she was a flirt. I wasn't sure I wanted to meet the other.

Rarity flopped to her back and cocked one of her legs in a certain, most inviting pose. With a sigh, she spoke. “Oh yes... I always feel a bit... hmm, loose and flexible, after I've seen them. Don't you agree?” she asked.

Truth be told, Aloe really had taken some kinks and knots out of my back, but at the price of my current state it wasn't worth it. I nodded. “Yeah, I feel pretty good,” I said, pivoting at my waist and swinging my upper body from side to side as though to stretch.

Rarity nodded. “Mmmhmm, I can see you enjoyed yourself,” she said with a smile. She stood up and trotted over. I gulped. The way she was walking... it was mezmorizing. “But... perhaps we could make this a trip you won't soon forget?” she offered as she gently put a hoof to my shoulder and pushed.

I let my body lower to my back and she held me down. “What do you say darling?” she asked as she bashed her eyes at me.

“Ffph... uhh... well...” my erection stiffened. “I think... kckk... it's been pretty memorable!” I gasped. My leg stiffened and tilted my body to one side. Rarity cocked an eyebrow.

“Well now darling... perhaps there's something... or somepony, in particular you would like to do before you leave?” she asked in a sultry tone. I cringed, trying to hold onto the last bits of control I had. In my efforts to control myself I accidentally poked her in the belly with my throbbing erection.

She rose a brow and looked down. “Oh... well what have we here?” she asked.

“Pffph! Accident!” I gasped through clenched teeth. She giggled with a blush.

“Darling, I hardly think that's an accident... but perhaps we could help each other with our similar problems. You see darling...” she trailed off and leaned in close, rubbing her fur against me in a most sensual way.

Putting her head beside mine, she whispered into my ear. “I'm very wet.”

'She's soaked! She just had a bath like you!' My conscious screamed at me to obey my better judgment. It would feel wrong to do this, I had no idea why but I knew it would. My face twisted as I tried to control myself. I probably looked like I had just had a stroke.

My imagination began to play with me, putting dirty thoughts into my head as my hands grasped her sides...

Author's Note

Yes indeed. Sorry for the wait but it's Burdy story time...

So I sometimes live in this house in town I have but this Korean neighbor of mine keeps parking in my laneway cause he thinks it's okay to do that. I've told him dozens of times to stop but I guess he thinks... I dunno, maybe it's funny to park in my laneway so that I can't fit my truck in my own laneway. Anyway about two weeks ago I was going to work at 6 or 7am and had to pick up some tools from my in-town house so I arrived, took a quick glance to make sure there was no pedestrians and began to back up. Now I was backing up slowly in 2wd and it had been snowing plus my lane way has a bit of a slope to it so when my truck came to a stop I thought maybe I needed more throttle so I kept giving more and more until my truck started backing up again. Once I had backed into my laneway I got out and got my tools. Of course... that's when I realized that I had completely totaled the back end of my neighbors Audi... he wouldn't even be able to open his gas cap it was so bad. Course all Cadence had was a clean mark in her rear bumper so I was like "Fuck it, he's not home (He goes to school in the morning), I gotta go to work" so I left and when I came back at around noon for lunch he was waiting for me, just foaming at the mouth he was so mad. So he was freaking out and screaming and whatever and I got a few pictures of it so he can't deny he was parked on my property... again, and just told him "Buddy listen, sorry this happened, it was an accident but I've told you time and time again... stop fucking parking on my property" but now he's really pissed and wants me to pay for his car... well whatever he can shit in one hand and wish in the other than tell me which one fills up first.
Hahaha, I'm such an ass. Anyway, hope you all had a Merry Christmas and jammy New Year

Chapter 46

'Some kinda massage...'

My body was shaking heavily, heart fluttering and barely able to breath. Rarity leaned over and planted a wet sloppy kiss on my lips then pressed her hoof to her mouth. “Sssh darling, let Mistress Rarity take care of you,” she whispered to me.

I could barely process anything that was happening as she began lowering her entrance towards my raging erection. As we made contact I shuddered. She was soaked. She rocked her hips, stroking her slit against the tip of my cock.

Almost instantly the tip was lubricated with her juices. I kept shuddering, unable to think about what I should do. It felt as if it would be really wrong if I did this, yet... I wanted to do it so badly. Rarity gently pushed herself down on me, only taking in the head of my shaft. I gasped and she moaned.

“Darling, don't cum too early. I've wanted this for far too long...” She let out a long, thrilled gasp of pleasure as she dropped down on me, taking my entire length in an instant. I got choked up in pleasure as I tried to breath yet instead let out a gasp.

She felt different then Twilight. The most notable thing was that her insides were a bit looser. My hands gripped her sides as she began to rock against me. The way she moved felt as though she knew what she was doing. Though she wasn't as tight as my mother, she could move in such a way that made up for it.

Her juices seeped out of her, plastering my groin area with lubrication as she bounced up and down on my lap. I tried to speak but as I opened my mouth all that came out was a gasp of pleasure.

Her inner muscles, though not quite as tight as I was accustomed, squeezed against me in a most experienced way. As she bounced up and down against my cock, her pussy gripped and stroked me.

It was all I could do but huff and gasp to breath. It was all so sudden and I was rather unprepared for this. Rarity leaned down and pressed her own lips to mine but this time I felt her tongue invade my mouth. In a form of natural instinct my own tongue began to battle with hers.

Rarity swung her head back, her mane swishing to and fro. The wet slopping sound of our intimate bond echoed off the walls. “Tell me how it feels darling!” she screamed. I tried to speak but all I could manage was a grunt. “Pound me darling, rut me like a dirty filly!” she screamed.

I began to thrust my hips against her, trying to match her pace but doing a horrible job of it. She began to moan wonderful things as she rode me. I still felt dazed, my body temperature still high and the heat of the sauna not helping in the least.

Rarity began to squeal and moan excessively, her rhythm no longer precise as it had been this whole time. She planted her front hooves on my shoulders, holding herself partially upright as she bounced on me. The slopping sounds became louder but were quickly drowned out by her voice.

“Oh darling... sweet Celestia... I'm cumming!” She began to jerk and twitch, still trying to ride me but failing at it. “K-kee-keep thru-thrusting darrrr...” she trailed off in a prolonged moan. I kept thrusting her as requested, only making her moan louder.

Her insides tightened against me and began to squeeze, seemingly tring to pull me deeper inside of me. “Deeper! Harder darling!” Rarity screamed. I couldn't really drive myself any deeper as I had already hit full mast but I followed the latter request and began to thrust harder.

Her forelegs gave out and she collapsed against me. Her tongue lolled out of her mouth, drool coming with it as I continued to pound her. Her insides continued to spasm as I thrusted into her and with it, her moans were everlasting.

I slowed myself to a stop to let her catch a breather. She was huffing, lost in her own bliss of orgasmic high. Her insides still twitched, not wanting my presence inside of her to leave. Ever so slowly, she came to her senses. Planting a kiss on my lips, she spoke. “Mmm, darling that was wonderful but...” she trailed off for a moment and wiggled her hips.

“But?...” I asked hesitantly and she gave me a most stunning look as she pulled herself off me. My shaft twitched as the incredible feeling of being inside her left. As my shaft left her insides, sloppy strings of marecum dripped down.

She turned around and lifted her rump towards me. Her hole was gaping a little but still twitching. Slimey juices coated her genital region and made it all the more inviting. Her clitoris twitched a bit and it looked almost as if it had winked at me.

Using one of her forehooves, she reached back and spread apart her pussy just a little bit more. “How about it darling?” she said in the most inviting way. “Feel like giving Mistress Rarity a good rutting?” she asked.

I didn't need to be asked twice. I crawled up behind her and grabbed her hips. Without even thinking to do it, I lined myself up with her and drove myself inside. The feeling was truly divine and I lost all other thoughts telling me to stop.

My upper half leaned down on top of her back as though I were a dog. My hips moved on their own, driving myself in and out of her wet hole. Rarity bit her lip to hold back a moan which ended up leaving her mouth anyway.

I was panting heavily, breathing onto the back of her neck. She dropped down a bit then used her hooves to rub her clitoris. As she did this, her insides began to twitch even more. She began to moan my name, telling me to rut her harder or how wonderful it felt.

I tried to speak but it came out in grunts. “Rar-Rarity... ugh... you're... you feel so good,” I gasped, barely able to breath. She pressed her rump to me as she continued to moan.

“Mmm... yes, moan for me darling. Tell me you want me! Tell me!” Rarity cried out. I leaned my head beside hers and whispered into her ear as I drove myself deep inside of her.

“Rarity... I want you!” I whispered then continued driving her. She let out whimpered moans of ecstasy as she presumably neared another orgasm.

“Ooooh, darling I'm going to cum again!” she cried out. Hearing her voice like that ramped up the intenisty of the pressure that had been gradually building up in the base of my cock. It felt so bad to think it but I wanted to keep railing her.

“Rarity... uhh... I'm gonna... I'm gonna cum!” I gasped and she pressed her rump agianst my hips.

“Don't pull out darling!” she whined. “Cum inside me. Make me your cum dumpster. Fill me with your foal batter!” she whined. I stopped for a moment from the last thing she had said... 'Foal batter? Really?'

The thought quickly left my mind as I edged myself on the brink of an orgasm. I restrained myself the best I could, holding it back for just a few seconds longer. The pressure became to much to handle and I drove myself deep. I let out a most primal grunt as I finished, plastering her insides with, as she called it, foal batter.

The first spurt shook my body as I came, my own cum mixing with hers as she was tipped over the edge and into her own orgasmic state. Her front legs gave out on her and she collapsed. I held her rump against my hips as I continued to cum inside of her.

Her tongue rolled out of her mouth and drool exited from the sides of her lips as she undoubtedly felt my cum seeping inside of her. I stopped thrusting all together and simply rode out my orgasm as my cock continued to twitch, dumping more seed into her.

As we both finished, mixed liquids began to seep out of her. I slowly pulled out of her with a 'schluck' and collapsed behind her. Her rump was still in the air, her hindlegs shaking yet able to support weight.

Cum oozed out of her still twitching pussy, dripping down into a puddle on the sauna bench. The sight kept me turned on and hard. Before either of us could speak, the door to the sauna swung open and Aloe stepped in.

“GUH!” I gasped, trying to conceal myself. The pink spa pony didn't seem at all bothered and instead spoke in a relaxed tone.

“Ahh, I see you have already started,” she said and I sputtered a response.

“W-w-well, actually... I err... uhm, we're done...” I blurted out and she giggled, trotted forwards and putting a hoof to my chest, holding me down on my back.

“Hmm... don't tell me a big strong ball player like yourself is finished after just one score,” she giggled in her adorable French accent. I went to say something but was cut off as she licked the entire underside of my still hard erection. Soon enough she began licking the side but stopped just as it was starting to feel amazing.

“Guh... hey...” I gasped, panting heavily. Aloe looked to Rarity who was, until now, just watching. Both Aloe and I looked to Rarity who had her hoof down between her legs, rubbing her sloppy slit that still oozed out cum.

“Mistress Rarity... it seems as though this one is too big for just one mare,” she said in an enticing tone. With that, Rarity crawled over to me, a look of lust in her eyes. The two mares held me down and both began to lick the sides of my raging erection. It was all I could do but lay back and bite my lip to hold back the pleasure I was feeling.

It seemed as though Aloe hadn't told me she was good with her tongue as well. “Wow... ahhh...” I gasped and the two mares looked to me with sultry eyes, their tongues running up and down my cock.

Before I could say much else, they both stopped and with it so did the blissful feeling. Aloe looked to me. “Rarity did purchase you the 'full' service. Perhaps it is time to give it to you,” she said, crawling herself atop of me.

She lowered her rump until I could just barely feel the heat emitting from her entrance. Very gently she stroked her slit against me in such a way it was nearly ticklish. I let out gasped moans as her pussy juices now coated me.

It was nearly nerve racking how she moved against me. I wanted... I needed to be inside of her. I moved my hips to drive myself into her but she was swift to counter. Despite moving her nether away from my poking cock, she managed to keep contact with me the entire time, driving my urges through the roof.

“Ah-ah-ahh, not so fast,” she taunted, continuing to tease me. Rarity gave a whine.

“Darling... I believe I'm in need of urgent assistance,” she whined. Aloe giggled and nodded.

“I believe the big strong ball player could easily handle two mares. Don't you?” she asked. Though she was looking directly at me, I wasn't sure who exactly she was asking. Rarity pulled herself over top of me and sat her rump on my face.

I let my tongue trail itself into her folds but immediately pulled back when I tasted my own cum that still resided inside of her. I frowned then realized the position I was in. I didn't really have much choice. My tongue moved on her again, mopping up her cum along with my own.

Before I could react, Aloe lowered herself slightly, taking in the head of my cock. I stiffened but she deprived me of any further pleasure, simply lifting herself and slipping my head back out.

I moaned into Rarity's pussy, her inner walls clasping against my tongue. Aloe once again took the head of my cock but again withdrew. She played with me again and again and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't drive myself any deeper inside of her.

Aloe spoke in a seductive way. “Tsk-tsk-tsk... such a naughty colt. You should be punished.” She lowered herself further, taking half my length. I felt her inner muscles go to work, massaging my shaft in an unimaginable way. But even so, only half my shaft remained inside of her.

As the feeling started to build pressure in my groin, she pulled herself off of me. “Ahhh...” I gasped. I let me tongue flick Rarity's clit, making her moan in return. I leaned my head to the side, only to be greeted with the sight of Rarity and Aloe making out atop of me.

I went back to work on Rarity, despite the taste. My tongue moved up and down her slit, stopping only to give her swollen fun button a little suck. Her moans were muffled by Aloe's mouth as they continued to make out.

The spa pony continued her agonizing teasing that only drove my urges further beyond. Every time she lowered herself, she'd only take half my length as her inner walls massaged me. Then, just as it started to become a bliss, she'd pull away.

I gripped Rarity's flanks, spreading them apart and pressing my face into her rump as my tongue further invaded her nethers. She pressed her rump harder against me, moaning deeply as I did the same.

Aloe once again lowered herself to mid length and held herself there. However this time she ever so slowly began lowering herself further. She took me, inch by inch, with a nearly mind blowing pace.

It was so slow yet I enjoyed every part of her advance. I felt myself finally going deeper and deeper into her massaging depths. Her inner walls rippled against my shaft, pulling me in deeper and deeper until she finally took my full length.

I pulled my head away from Rarity's behind with an audible gasp. With that Aloe began to ride me, no longer teasing me.

Her insides squelched against my shaft, squeezing it ever so slowly and pulling me in deeper with each thrust. I shuddered as I began to lop up the excess juices around Rarity's folds.

Aloe giggled. “Mmm... it seems this one has quite the endurance, no?” she asked. Rarity nodded as she swung her forehoof to her head.

“Oh... mmm, you have no ahhh-dea... ahhh, ooooh. I've waited for this for too long,” she moaned loudly. I kept bucking my hips into Aloe. Her movements and the way her insides moved against my invading member were just mind blowing.

Rarity began to moan loudly and with that her inner walls clasped against my tongue, squeezing me and trying to draw me in deeper. She whipped her head back with an orgasmic scream, her mane flipping back with the motion of her head.

As I pumped myself into Aloe, I felt the ever lingering feel of orgasm start to build itself inside. I began to buck harder, my hands holding her hips down. She seemed to know what was about to happen and devilishly slid off my rod. I gasped as the lonesome feeling of being withdrawn from her silky insides hit my body.

“UGH! Ahh... hey!” I gasped. She gave me a coy smile and shrugged as she laid down to her back and pulled Rarity over top of herself. I rose a brow, not sure what exactly she was up to.

With a hushed moan, she spoke to me. “Now the question at hoof becomes... whom would you rather finished with?” she asked, using her hooves to spread apart Rarity's flank cheeks and reveal the mare's glistening cunt.

I bit my lip. Rarity was so stunning... I crawled my body over the two of them and lined myself up with Rarity's slimming entrance. Her juices leaked out and coated my shaft. I prodded my head inside of her and she bit her lip to stifle a moan.

Aloe put her own lips to Rarity's and embraced the two of them into a blissful kiss. I slid myself into Rarity and she whipped her head back with a loud moan. Aloe giggled. “Ahh... succumbed to her irresistible beauty I see?” she commented through a question.

As I pounded the fashionista, recent memories of the spa pony's most delectable pussy returned. While I pulled back, seemingly for another thrust, I slipped out of Rarity completely. She gave a sharp inhale as my presence left her. Her sharp inhale was followed by a gasp from Aloe as I impaled her.

The warm silky sensation of the spa pony returned to pleasure me in a way I couldn't describe in words. I hunched over, my body nearly resting on Rarity's back. The two mares began to tongue kiss beneath me as I built my way towards a second cumming.

With a long stride backwards I pulled myself out of the spa pony and returned my presence to the boutique owner, of whom gave a satisfied moan. After a few thrusts I returned myself to the spa pony.

As I rotated from one mare to the next, the pressure in my groin became to much. I pulled out and held myself at bay. Aloe giggled. “It seems you have reached you limit... the question is, whom do you wish to finish inside of, hmm?” she asked coyly.

I was huffing, wishing I could go longer. She probably knew this was a difficult decision. I looked down to see both their glistening entrances being presented to me, twitching and waiting for me. I lined myself up somewhere between them, feeling the textures of both their pussies.

I began to stroke the head of my erection up and down both their slits, the two of them moaning into each other's mouths. The decision was so agonizing I couldn't think. Instead I just thrust myself forwards. My cock slid between the two of them, rubbing between the two of them.

I felt both their nubs rubbing against my shaft as I pulled back, the duo now moaning louder than before. With the decision still too patronizing to make I instead began sliding myself between their twats, both their juices now coating me.

Aloe pulled her head away from Rarity with a deep moan. With it, I felt her cunny twitching against me, almost begging for me to be inside of her. I felt myself, all the built up teasing from earlier, start to boil over.

I pulled back just as I felt my first jet of cum ready to leave. I aimed it low, plasting the first spurt of white cream all over Aloe's twitching twat. As the second spurt was just leaving I tried to aim upwards for Rarity's but missed a little bit and splattered my essence all over her rump.

I plowed myself between the duo as I dumped my balls. I lurched forwards, collapsing over top of their bodies as I drained myself. After a few brief moments I could take no more and fell backwards.

A slight ooze of cum still left my shaft but nothing noticeable as I laid on my back. I rubbed my forehead, the intense heat of this 'massage' getting to me. Rarity rolled off Aloe, revealing both their cum covered bellies and rear ends.

Aloe brought her hoof up and rested her cheek on it as she laid on her said. “Rarity, I will have to thank you for bringing him. I will say, this will be one of the more memorable moments of my career. He is certainly a stud,” she mentioned and Rarity nodded with a deep exhale.

As I laid on my back, my mind started to think clearly again... the voice in the back of my head fadding into my mind. 'DON'T DO IT DAMMIT! GET OUTTA THERE! NOW!' It screamed. Just as I thought about what was happening, the door once again opened, and my mother stood in the doorway, her mouth slacked open in shock.

“GUH! MOM!” I gasped. My heart sank. I was in deep trouble. Rarity however didn't seem to notice and spoke in a curious tone.

“Darling... are you okay? Sweetheart, is something wrong?” she asked again...

* * *

Rarity's voice snapped me out of my hallucination, probably caused by the aphrodisiac. My conscious roared at me. 'RUUUUUNNNNNNN!' I pushed myself back, sliding out from underneath Rarity in an instant. My grasp on reality was just barely clinging. Rarity cocked her head to the side.

“Darling, is it-” but I cut her off as I jumped to my feet, stumbling back and tripping.

“Guh... uhh, Rarity I... I uhh...” I rolled backwards and to my feet. “I uhh... I gotta go. I uhm... see yah tomorrow,” I stuttered out. I spun on my heels and made a b-line for the exit but ended up slamming right into the sauna door. Scurrying, I yanked the door open, nearly pulling it off the hinges.

I rushed away, leaving my towel behind as I ran into the mud bath room. Not stopping, I leaned my body slightly and scooped up all my clothes, holding the cluster over my genital region to keep myself somewhat decent.

I plowed my way from room to room and into the receptionist area. Aloe was missing but the blue pony was there. She reached down and pulled out a small wrapped item. “Do you want a-” I cut her off.

“NO!” I gasped, running straight past her and not stopping. In my current state, the item looked like a wrapped condom but I couldn't be sure.

As I burst out of the door, I faintly heard her voice. It was a little timid, though not as much as Fluttershy's, and somewhat confused. “A fortune cookie?” Her voice was lost in the wind as I rushed through town in the nude.

I made note I should stop at Rarity's to pick up my truck but at the moment I was hornier than a ten peckered billy goat. I made my way straight home, not bothering to make eye contact with any pony.

I burst through the library doors, slamming them shut behind me. “MOM I-” I cut myself off as I realized there was another pony in the room. She was a unicorn with light green fur and a two tone mane color. Her mane was partially green, that matched her coat, with a stripe of white. Her golden eyes went wide as she saw me in the doorway. Actually, for the record both mares' eyes were wide.

“Be I basement... ugh! I'm gonna... downstairs!” I blurted out, trying to say I'd be in the basement. I rushed to the basement and paced around in circles frantically. “WhatamIgoingtodowhatamIgoingtodoWHATAMIGOINGTODO?!” I gasped.

Without warning my fist clenched and hammered itself across my jaw. 'Shut up, sit down... relax,' my conscious spoke. My legs trembled and I flopped myself down on the nearby bench that was used for the bench press.

I dropped my head into my shaky hands as I let out a sigh. My conscious spoke up again. 'I'll tell you what you're gonna do... you're gonna wait 'till that other mare leaves, then you're gonna go upstairs and you're gonna fuck Twilight,' he said in the most calm and simple voice. I rose a brow. He said it in such a way that it took me off guard.

I sat there for a few moments before I heard the door to the basement click shut. I looked up as my mom trotted down the stairs. She approached me with a cocked brow and a most curious look on her face. “Evan, is something wrong?” she asked.

I stood up and let my erection swing into view. She bit her lip. “Oh... heh, I see...”

* * *

I awoke with a bit of a drowse. As my vision continued to display blurred images, I swung my arm over and felt around for my nightstand. Finally finding it, I retrieved my eye patch and slipped it on.

Everything finally came to focus and I grabbed my watch. It was now Thursday, July 3rd. I was pretty exhausted and beat to say the least. I had been very... active yesterday afternoon... and evening... and through most of last night... and part of the early morning today.

I let out a yawn as I figured it was late enough in the morning I should get up. I took notice that my mother wasn't in bed with me. She must have either went back up to her own room or woken up earlier than me.

I took note that I smelt rather bad and would be in need of a shower before I put fresh clothes on. I grabbed my watch and holy necklace along with an full set of clean clothes before making my way upstairs.

As I made my way to the washroom, my nostrils picked up the scent of fried potatoes and eggs. 'Mmm... better hurry before Lassie gets to them,' I thought as I shut the bathroom door behind me.

I took off my old briefs and eye patch and slipped into the shower. As I began washing down I took notice that we had new shampoo. This one was supposed to smell like grapes. 'Grapes... grapes, what are grapes supposed to smell like?' I thought to myself as I sniffed the open cap of the bottle.

Indeed it smelt wonderful but I doubt it was what grapes actually smelt like. I quickly soaped up and washed myself down. I squirted out some shampoo but had forgotten that my hair was now a lot shorter. In turn I had an excess amount of shampoo that foamed off my head.

I quickly scrubbed my hair and washed it clean before going to hop out. Just as I turned off the shower I groaned and face palmed. “Uhh... fuck!” I hissed to myself, realizing I had yet again forgotten to get myself a towel to dry off with.

I peaked out of the shower curtain and tried to lean my body towards the cupboards. It was no use in even trying as the cupboards were over six feet away. “Dammit... gurrr.. come on! THIS IS SO DIFFICULT!” I gasped as I reached.

My conscious spoke up. 'NO! Only difficult in your mind. You must unlearn... what you have learned,' it spoke and I lost my balance, falling face first into the floor with a wail of shock.

My conscious groaned. 'Always with you, it cannot be done,' it joked. “Shut up!” I grunted as I stood up, dripping water all over the floor as I grabbed two fresh towels. Using one to dry myself off, I used the other to dry off the floor. I slipped on my apparel and proceeded out of the washroom, hanging up the towels as I left.

I walked into the kitchen, half expecting to find either Spike or Twilight cooking but instead found Lassie working over the stove. “L-Lassie?” I asked in slight shock. She cocked a brow and gave me a look.

“What? Just cause I'm a dog doesn't mean I can't cook... now, do you like sunny side up or scrambled?” she asked. I was baffled and turned to see Spike and Twilight sitting at the table. I turned back to Lassie then back to the others. I blinked but Lassie's voice interrupted my state of mind. “Well... what'll it be, hotshot?” she asked. I sat down.

“Uhh.. whatever's clever I guess,” I replied and Lassie nodded.

“Sunny side up it is. You want toast with that?” she asked and I nodded.

“Please,” I replied. I scratched my head. She had also set out some fruit dishes on the table with sliced oranges and apples along with a large bowl of fruit salad and another bowl of grapes. “She's good,” I said, mostly to myself.

Twilight spoke up. “I know. I thought it was Spike cooking. Heh, you don't see that much... a dog cooking,” she laughed and I nodded, looking back to my canine friend who was also wearing a cooking apron.

The sight just baffled me. Lassie spoke up and again broke my thoughts. “Yeah, I can also burn cookies and keep home invaders away,” she laughed. I just rolled my eye. Lassie came over and set the table like she was a waitress. "You think if I get real good at this they'd give me a job at Franchini's?" she asked. Nopony answered. SHe grumbled to herself, "Figures."

She then quickly began serving out our food. “Twilight: Scrambled and cooked nicely. Spike: Sunny side up, yolk a little runny... and toast, buttered lightly and... Evan: Sunny side up, cooked nicely, yolk not runny, toast not buttered... voila. Lassie: leftovers,” she said as she scrapped out what was left onto a plate for herself.

“Thanks Lassie. That's very kind of you,” I complimented and she laughed.

“Don't thank me till yah taste it. Never know, it might just be horrid!” she laughed and I chuckled, a thought coming up.

“I remember one time, a couple years ago back... well you know. Anyway uhh... 'she', came up into my room, hammered out of her mind and said she had made breakfast. At first I said no but then she demanded I eat so I came down and... well I thought it was fried chicken...” I looked to my mom.

“I know you guys don't eat chicken around here but fried chicken back on my world was really good. So I thought 'Sweet, fried chicken for breakfast, that's not bad!' but then she said 'No, it's not fried chicken it's pancakes'.” I began to laugh. “She had cooked them through and put shake and bake on them,” I chuckled, shaking my head. Lassie rose a brow.

“They must've tasted horrible!” she exclaimed and I shrugged.

“Dunno, didn't try them... ah-haha, that made her real mad,” I said as I used my fork to try one of her eggs. I mouthed it around then nodded, giving her a thumbs up.

I looked to the fruits and grabbed myself some of the orange slices. As I went to take a bite out of my toast though, I again noticed the bowl of grapes. Rubbing my chin, I took a small vine of them and sniffed. Twilight giggled.

“Tried out the new shampoo?” she asked, reading me like a book. I nodded.

“Yeah... either the shampoo doesn't smell like grapes or these grapes aren't grapes...” I looked and took a mouthful of the delicious little fruit. “Pretty good though.”

We all sat and conversed while having breakfast together. Spike was going out with Sweetiebelle to play today, Lassie said she was going out to play in the pastures and that left just Twilight and myself.

My mother looked to me. “So Evan, plans for today?” she asked and I merely shrugged.

“Well... I have to go see Rarity. She's making me a suit for the gala... oh, and she's going with me too. I have to drop by and see her...” I trailed off and thought about yesterday's occurrence, then quickly pushed it from my mind. “Need to make sure it fits,” I said. “Yourself?” I asked.

“Well... actually I was hoping that, if you weren't too busy, I could teach you a little bit more about magic.” I bit my lip. I supposed that technically I was her student so I would have to learn something to prove we weren't both failing at our respective roles.

I nodded. “Sure, okay,” I replied.

The morning continued to go on, Celestia's sun beaming through the windows. As time rolled on, Lassie and Spike left leaving Twilight and I to clean up. We pitched together and had the dishes done in no time, leaving them in the rack to dry as we both left the library.

As we stepped out I took a look to the car shelter. “Oh... actually, we should stop by Rarity's first so I can pick up my truck and I can also get that suit tested. Two birds with one stone, right?” I suggested and Twilight nodded with a smile.

“Sure thing... one condition though?” she asked. I looked to her. “Can you teach me to drive?” she asked and I chuckled.

“Sure, alright yeah. I'll teach you have to drive Cadence,” I offered. We walked through town with a casual pace. Up above I saw a streak fly past. My eye darted up and I spotted Rainbow Dash zipping along, doing all sorts of acrobatic aerial tricks. I smirked and looked back down to the town.

We finally approached Rarity's and I knocked. Nearly immediately the door was swung open and Rarity came out in a frantic way. “Oh darling I'm... one moment Twilight darling, I require a bit of privacy with Evan.” She yanked me into the boutique and knelt me down. “Darling, I'm so-so-SO very sorry about my actions the other day. They were unprofessional, rude and-” I put a hand to her mouth.

“Rarity, I... uhm well... let's just say I think we were both not thinking straight. For old times sake maybe... well, let's both forget it ever happened? Nothing really bad happened to speak of so... no harm, no foul. Right?” I offered and she let out a relieved sigh. I guess we had both been under the effects of those damn flowers... can't imagine why they'd have them, nor why ponies might keep coming back if they were left in a state like me.

“Yes darling, I was thinking much the same thing. Now let's put that in the past and never speak of this again,” she said and gave me a tight hug which I returned. As I stood up, she called out for Twilight to enter.

The two of them began conversation, mostly Rarity telling her about her preparations for the gala tomorrow. I looked around then spotted a classy looking suit that was hung up. “Hey Rarity...” I called out and turned to look at her. “Sorry to interrupt but... is that...” I pointed to the suit and she nodded with a smile.

“Yes-yes darling. Try it on, and do please try to be gentle with it. It's a one of a kind you know,” she said.

I walked over, undressing down to my underwear and socks while still looking at the suit. I slipped on the jet black pants, then the white undershirt shirt, the black bow-tie, then the all black suit jacket and finally the black buckle shoes.

I looked at myself in the mirror. In the left chest pocket was a little white handkerchief. The shirt underneath the jacket was collared at the wrists. Everything fit like a charm and gave me excellent mobility yet at the same time comfort. I looked at myself again and slid my right sleeve up a bit to reveal my custom F&F watch.

'Now I just need a Walther PPK and an Aston Martin... well, actually I do have the battle truck, Juggernaut... and she's got all those gizmos... so I guess I really only need the PPK... hmm...' I thought to myself.

Rarity and Twilight looked over to me, the former speaking first. “Darling, that looks splendid on you,” she chimed and Twilight pitched in as well.

“Yes, it looks really good. Wow Rarity, I'm really surprised how well that suit turned out given the time period,” she complimented and Rarity just smiled, swishing her mane to the side with a swing of her head, displaying her elegance.

“Well of course darling. He needs to look absolutely stunning to truly show the upper class that Princess Celestia chose wisely with her private invitation to him,” she spoke.

“Call me Bond, James Bond...” I tried to hum the bond tune while at the same time snapping to add extra chorus but failed rather poorly. I just chuckled and removed the clothing, hanging it back up as neatly as I could before slipping into my regular clothing.

I gave Rarity a nod. “So... uhm... tomorrow. When do you wanna go?” I asked.

“Well darling, the Canterlot train will leave by noon, but perhaps you should come around a bit earlier so I can do you hair up nicely. Shall we say, eleven thirty?” she offered and I nodded.

“Oky doke. We'll be off then,” I said and with that I left with my mother, making our way over to Cadence. I opened the door for my mother and let her hop into the driver seat. I made my way around to the passenger side and slid into the middle of the bench seat.

“Okay...” I began to give her the rundown of how everything worked, from the naughty key to the accelerator and everything in between that she'd need to know.

“Okay so I just-” she went to swipe the naughty key but I held her hoof.

“Ah-ah-ahh... you need to sweet talk her a bit. First time, yah know.” I smiled. She just rolled her eyes with a silent laugh.

“Okay... Cadence... how are you? Uhm...” she trailed off and looked to me.

I began to stroke the steering column. “Like this... hey baby... oooh, you're such a good girl. Yeah, you've always been faithful for me, right darling... mhmm. Oh you know I love you sweetheart,” I rubbed my face against the steering wheel. “Oh yeah... you're such a darling... so how bout this one time, for me?” I trailed off and nodded to Twilight who just rolled her eyes.

“Is that really necessary?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Nah... but Cadence needs love to yah know,” I said as she swiped the naughty key then started the vehicle. Twilight squirmed in her seat to see over the steering wheel. “Okay... now on the side of the seat...” I trailed off and showed her how to use the captain seat controls to adjust the seat and the tilt column to lower the steering wheel itself.

With that Twilight looked over her shoulder to check behind us as she slipped the truck into reverse.

We slowly backed up and she then put the truck into drive and began puttering through town. “I'm... I'm doing it! Look Evan, I'm doing it!” she squealed and I nodded, hands ready just in case.

“Yeah... yeah you are... hey you ain't half bad at this actually,” I mentioned. As we drove along at a slow pace, she looked to the floor.

“Hey, what's that shaft thing do?” she asked, pointing to the standard four wheel drive stick.

“Uhhh... that's the four wheel stick shift. You don't need to use that, not right now anyway,” I replied. I took notice of how dirty Cadence was and twitched my lip. “But we will need to give Cadence a bath,” I commented and Twilight rose a brow.

“That would have to be a pretty big water source. Perhaps the lake?” she asked and I chuckled, deciding to choose a better set of words.

“Uhm... no that's not what I meant. I mean, we'll have to give her a wash... like with the garden hose or something,” I replied and she nodded with a look of understanding on her face.

She drove us all the way back to the house and even managed to park the truck into the car shelter.

Shutting her down, I went around to the side of the house and retrieved the hose, while Twilight got a bottle of liquid wash soap and a foam brush along with a bucket.

As I watered down the truck, my mom made a soapy water mixture in the bucket and began to soap up Cadence, using the foam brush to gently scrub the soap onto the truck. Soon enough I was trying to wash the truck but found some of the dirt spots difficult to wash off. “Huh... I need more pressure...” I muttered to myself and Twilight took hold of the hose with her magic.

Somehow she manipulated the water into a higher pressure with the use of magic. 'I gotta learn how to do that,' I thought to myself as Twilight washed down the truck. “Evan?” she asked and I nodded. “Why is it exactly that you consider me your mother? Just wondering,” she asked and I shrugged, the answer easier than she probably expected.

“Well... you took me in... you cared for me when you were probably stressed and fed up with my attitude. You gave me shelter despite barely knowing me. You loved me, cared for me, nurtured me... I mean... isn't that what a mother is?” I asked with risen brows and she bit her lip.

Continuing to wash the vehicle she asked another similar question. “Well... it's just that... well you know...” she trailed off and waited for me to speak but when I didn't she spoke again. “Well, I mean isn't it just slightly strange to you that I'm a pony... I'm your age and... and... well, you did take my virginity so...” she trailed off and I was thrown off a little, feeling a bit dizzy.

“A-ar-re you... are you trying to... teh... toooo...” I trailed off.

“I'm not saying anything!” she blurted out quickly. “I was just... well wondering you know?” she asked nervously and I stumbled a bit, loosing my balance and staggered. She was right there to catch me.

“Evan!” she gasped.

“Mom... I love you,” I sputtered and she nodded. Giving me a quick kiss she smiled.

“I love you too. I was just wondering was all. I'm not saying anything. Evan I'll always love you and never, ever, think that I don't... okay?” she asked and I started to regain my balance, relief washing over me.

“Okay,” I whispered back. After several moments we started washing down the truck again. As I went to wash off the front bumper, a warm splash of water hit me. Soapy suds covered my body, followed by Twilight's squeal of laughter. “GAH!” I gasped as I was partially blinded by the soap in my good eye.

“Gotcha!” she laughed. A sly grin came across my lips as I grabbed the water hose that was no longer in her control and sprayed her. “AHHH! HEY THAT'S COLD!” She screamed.

“Now I got you!” I laughed back. Suddenly the water simply shut off. I looked at the hose, it felt as if it had water pressure. I looked down the nozzle to see if perhaps something had blocked it's path.

As I looked down the hose, I saw a purple aura blocking the water. As I realized what was happening, I also realized it was too late. The aura disappeared and the water blasted me right in the face, making me stagger back in shock.

Twilight giggled. I looked at her with a look of playful competition. “Oh... it's on now,” I said as I grabbed the foam brush and rubbed soap into her mane. “Uh, hey!” she laughed, squirting me with the soap bottle then using her magic to make the water gently spray me, bubbles foaming off me like a plague.

I frowned but Twilight couldn't help but laugh. “Oh yeah?” I asked and she nodded.

“Yeah,” she giggled. I rose my brows, which weren't visible under the cascade of foamy soap.

“Oh 'yeah'?” I asked again but she could help but to keep laughing. I rushed forwards and grabbed her, rubbing soap into her fur and mane then splashing us both with the hose, causing even more bubbles to erupt. “Yeah... that's what,” I laughed, both of us now bubble monsters.

We giggled for a little while before walking outside and hosing our bodies off, washing ourselves off in a way. As we finished off with the bubbles Twilight used her magic to shut the water off and wrap up the garden hose.

Soaking wet, I looked to Twilight. “So... don't suppose you have a... like... drying spell?” I asked. From up above, Rainbow Dash zoomed down, landing in perfect stance nearby.

“Hey Twi, I was wondering if I could borrow the latest issue of Daring Do?” she asked and Twilight cocked a brow, water still streaming off her straightened fur.

“Don't you already have it?” she asked but Dash shook her head as she came over.

“No-no, I meant that new one. Daring Do and The Horned Mountain. The one you got for your birthday,” she mentioned and Twilight smiled.

“Ohh, that one. Well sure, of course Dash. Just let me dry off bef-” she wasn't even half done and Rainbow Dash zoomed at us. In an instant we were surrounded by... a tornado? Wind gusted around the both of us, followed by a warm heat and suddenly, just as soon as it had started, it stopped.

Dash stepped down and smirked. “In seconds flat,” she boasted then squealed with laughter. “BWAH-HA-HA-HA, you two look hilarious!” she squealed. I looked to Twilight whose fur was puffy and her mane was frazzled. She looked to me and giggled.

I touched my hair and realized it was in a miniature Afro. Both of us quickly patted down our respective hairstyle and looked to Dash who was cackling with laughter. With a sigh, she wiped a tear from her face. Twilight went inside with Dash to fetch the book while I stayed outside. I looked to Cadence and smiled. She was sparkly clean and had a reflective glow to her, the sun's rays bouncing off her and making her really shine. I took respect to how well Flim and Flam had fixed her. There were no longer speckles of surface rust and everything about her seemed to now work with clock-like precision.

Before I knew it, Dash was taking off like a jet and Twilight was back at my side with a set of books, among other things. “Come on, this way,” she said as she led me out of town and to the pasture fields.

I strolled along with long strides, relaxed and calm. Twilight trotted along with a bright smile. The long grass in the field blew to and fro in the gentle and calm wind. Celestia's sun shone down upon the world with a comfortable temperature. The hair on my air prickled up a little, along with the hair on the back of my neck as a shiver of warm comfort went down my back.

Twilight led me out to an open pasture and set down what looked like a picnic blanket but instead placed her books and other study equipment on it. There was an assortment of gizmos, pens and pencils, notebooks etc.

Twilight sat down and I across from her. “Okay... so whatta I do?” I asked and she rolled a pencil towards me. I picked it up and she smiled.

“Okay, one of the first spells most any unicorn learns is levitation,” she said and I groaned.

“Ugh... I've tried. I don't know how,” I complained but she persisted.

“Well, if you can perform a drastic spell like that energy blast, I believe something as simple as levitation is well within you grasp,” she stated in a tutoring voice and I fell to my back, rolling from side to side.

“How can I even perform magic to begin with, I don't even have a horn,” I mentioned and she shrugged.

“I was a bit skeptical at first too, but I think your body must be some form of... maybe like a conductor. I'd have to do tests on your body but for right now that's not the issue at hand. Set the pencil down and then try to pick it up with magic alone,” she ordered then took out her notebook.

I set the pencil down and stared at it, focusing with my mind to try and pick it up. I sat... and sat... and sat, just staring at the damn thing. “Ugh... it's so... it's so light...” I stressed out, holding my breath and straining my body to try and pick it up. However despite my effort the pencil didn't budge.

“Ugh... this is impossible,” I grunted and Twilight just sighed.

“It's not so much a physical effort as a mental one. Just relax... calm yourself and gently think. Don't think about lifting it so much as just moving it at frist.” She then wrote something in her notebook and looked back to the pencil.

I licked my lips then leaned down so my face was near the pencil. “Alright you little bastard...” I inhaled deeply then blew at the pencil, blowing it away. Twilight just sighed.

“Come on Evan. You have to take this seriously. How else are you gonna learn about this stuff?” she asked and I just rolled around on the ground, groaning to myself.

She rose a brow. “Hey wait... Evan can you balance... oh hold on, give me a second...” she trailed of and pulled out a large hard cover book and set it down then placed a bit on top of it. 'What is she up to? If I can't lift a damn pencil how am I supposed to lift a textbook?' I thought. As my thoughts lingered, she pulled out a single bit and placed it on the book. “Can you balance a bit?” she asked and I sighed.

“No, I don't even know how to levit-” she cut me short.

“No-no, I mean with your hands. Just balance it so it stands upright,” she offered and I smirked.

Taking hold of the bit with my right index and thumb I steadied the coin upright. “Yeah,” I said with a smile. “But I don't think that's magic.” She took hold of the bit with a magic aura and spun it.

“Okay, now when it starts to slow down try to use your magic to keep it upright,” she suggested. That... sounded harder than just moving the pencil. I focused on the bit and waited for it to slow down then tried with my mind to stop it upright. As I tried, the bit continued to slow down, starting to wobble a bit. Seeing it still somewhat upright I closed my eyes and held my palms flat, imagining some mystic energy leaving my hands and grasping the coin, keeping it upright and balancing it.

Instead my concentration was broken by the sound of the coin tumbling. I opened my eyes and sighed in unison with my mother. “Ugh... can we try something else?” I asked, grabbing her book of magic and flipping to a random page. The was a picture with a unicorn whose horn was lit and a nearby tree was bent.

“How bout this one?” I asked, pointing to the picture. Twilight shook her head.

“No, that's a solid material manipulation spell. You wouldn't be able to perform it without first learning a levitation spell. Evan you don't understand. Levitation is the most basic spell and in some cases the base spell needed to perform more advanced magic... like that one,” she mentioned and I groaned. “But...” she trailed off.

I tilted my head up and looked to her. She had pulled out a pitcher of what I presumed was lemonade and poured herself a glass. I sat up. “Lemonade?” I asked, my ears nearly perkingup with my spirit. She nodded as she downed her glass and licked her lips.

“Mhmm, and it's pretty good.” She set a glass dome cover over the pitcher just as I went to grab it.

“Uhh...” I tried to grab the glass dome but it was protected by a purple glowing shield. “Hey!” I gasped and she smiled.

“Think of it like... an incentive to try harder,” she said mischievously. I frowned but she shrugged with a smile. “A levitation spell could easily penetrate this shield spell. Tell you what. If you can just budge the pitcher... no, not even. If you can just ripple the juice, I'll let you have a glass,” she offered.

I struck the shield with the side of my palm, hand clenched in a fist. The dome didn't even budge and neither did anything beneath it, the shield protecting it completely. Twilight sighed. “I meant with a levitation spell, Evan,” she commented. I bit my lip with a frown and tried to shake the shield and when that didn't work, the picnic blanket. “Evan, this shield is nearly impenetrable. My brother taught me it,” she commented.

I tried striking it multiple times to break it but it didn't deter in the slightest. “Evan... ugh, never mind. The longer you take to accept the fact you need to use a levitation spell, the longer it'll be before you get some fresh, delicious lemonade,” she commented, putting emphasis on the last words.

I sat back for a moment, silent and tapping my fingers together in a way that resembled Mr. Burns. I opened my right palm and looked to it, then to the shield, to my palm and finally to the shield again.

Twilight took out her notebook and began writing things down. I clenched my right hand into a fist and thought hard. Suddenly my hand was coated in a dark blue fiery aura, which caught Twilight's attention.

I opened my hand and electricity crackled about. I set my hand against the shield and Twilight's eyebrows rose. My hand slipped right through both the shield and the dome. As I grabbed the pitcher of lemonade, it too was encased in the dark fiery aura that coated my hand.

I pulled back and with it, the pitcher and juice slipped right past the glass dome and her magic shield. Her jaw went slack as I looked to her with a somewhat blank look. “Does this mean I can have some lemonade... I mean... I did move it right?” I asked and she began sputtering something out.

“E-e-ev-evan... tha-that's a... a... in-intangibility sp-spell... how'd you... you do that?” she stammered and I shrugged.

“Ah dunno... you once said if I put my mind to it I could do it... well, minus levitation. I just figured... abracadabra, alakazoo, I got some lemonade just for you... well, ahem... for me too,” I said and cocked a brow. “So how bout it? Can I have some?” I asked with a bright smile and she nodded quickly as she frantically scribbled some things down in her notebook with haste.

“That's amazing. Evan, that spell is very advanced, even for talented unicorns,” she appraised and I just shrugged.

“I just wanted some lemonade. I probably wouldn't be able to do something like that again,” I replied as I got some lemonade. We sat for a bit and sipped on lemonade as she wrote things down. After a short time she pulled out her spell book and began teaching me other things, ditching the levitation spell idea for now.

I had a bit of trouble with some spells that were supposed to be simple like altering the wind direction. Interestingly enough, other more intermediate, and even some advanced, spells I seemed to catch onto in a jiffy such as color distortion spells. Heh, I even managed to change an apple blue and in turn it actually tasted like a blueberry.

Twilight was baffled near the end. “Wow... Evan that's... it's incredible. Some of the spells that give you the most trouble are so basic yet you can accomplish the most intermediate spells with ease,” she complimented and I smiled.

“Does that mean I get a cookie?” I asked and she just snickered.

“Well... I don't have any cookies but how about some more lemonade?” she asked, pouring me some more lemonade.

We sat back and relaxed for a short instant before the crack of thunder shocked us both. Twilight looked around in curiosity. It wasn't raining and there wasn't a dark cloud in sight. A sudden cry of dispair could be heard and we both looked to the sky. A gray pegasus fell from the sky, smoke following her.

“UGH! DERPY!” I gasped, leaping up and rushing to try and reach her. It didn't even take a second to realize she was impossibly out of reach. She plumeted from the sky, unable to catch herself as she fell downwards.

'NO, DERPY!' My mind roared as time itself seemed to slow. I had to save her!

A flash of light blasted through my mind like a bolt of lightning and I stiffened while my mind seemed to go blank. My body tensed up violently. Static electricity coursed through my body. It felt as if my body just... fell apart, not painfully but I still didn't feel a single fabric of my body.

Suddenly I materialized, my arms already reached out and catching Derpy midflight. In moments I realized I was hundreds of feet into the air, with a smoking pegasus mare in my arms. I let out a scream but just as I did my mind seemed to vanish itself into nothing and I felt my body fade from reality again.

Just as soon as I had lost myself, my mind flashed back to reality as my heels skidded against the ground, bringing both myself and Derpy to a stop. I breathed heavily, not sure what had just happened.

I looked down to Derpy who had a look of shock that was probably similar to mine. “E-Evan? You saved me... I didn't even see you,” she said and I turned around, only to see Twilight over two hundred yards away.

“Y-yeah... I uhh... I'm not sure what happened.” I watched Twilight galloping over frantically. “Uhm... think you can walk?” I asked and she nodded. I set her down and she shook like a dog, puffs of soot shaking out of her fur. Before I knew it, she was sparkly clean.

I patted the soot off my previously clean shirt and before I could say a word, Derpy was clung to me in a hug. “Thank you so much! I'm so sorry this always happens... I just don't know what went wrong,” she apologized but I just tuffled her mane.

“It's alright Derpy. I like catching you,” I gave her a wink. Quickly realizing what it would look like I smirked. “Sorry I... tried to wink but uhh... one eye,” I chuckled and she nodded.

“Well thanks again,” she thanked me and I just nodded with a thumbs up. Twilight finally reached our side.

“Evan! Evan you just... you just... teleported!” she exclaimed and I was a bit blank faced. “How did you... you... you...” she trailed off and caught her breath along with her thoughts. “It took me months of training to learn that. How did you...” she trailed off while I just shrugged.

“I dunno really... all I knew was that... well, I needed to save Derpy and I just... well, followed my heart I guess? I dunno, it just sort of happened,” I replied. Twilight was still baffled.

“Are you sure you don't know how to perform a levitation spell?” she asked and I just shook my head then snapped.

“No, but... say Derpy, you busy right now?” I asked and she shook her head silently. “Wanna have some lemonade with us? Were having a picnic... kind of,” I offered and her wings sprang out.

“Sure! And I even brought some muffins if you guys want some!” she exclaimed. Muffins sounded pretty good right now. I nodded while she reached into her torched saddle bag that had probably been fried from her... whatever had just happened. She retrieved the muffins which were thoroughly burnt. She took a bite and smiled with a 'Mmm'.

Twilight spoke up. “Uhm... Derpy... those are a little burnt you know,” she commented and Derpy just nodded.

“Well you know what they say,” she said in her adorable dopey voice. “Burnt makes yah beautiful.”

Author's Note

Well, I hope you're all having a fantastic new year, if not, chin up then you'll drown slower... hee-hee, sorry, that's pretty dark. Anyway, cheers everyone

Chapter 47

'Trains...'

Derreck's perspective...

I crept through the luscious jungle. My white tank top clung to my torso with an elastic feel, allowing my body to breath while still clasping snugly to my body. The pants were simple jeans along with a set of work boots that slushed through the grimy undergrowth of this forest that was more like a jungle.

My ears perked at the sound of a yipping fox. My movements slowed to a crawl, not even the sound of the mush squelching beneath me audible. My arms moved in front of me, gently pushing aside the thick foliage.

Sweat dripped down my face, some rolling past my eye patch. I let out a quiet exhale. The smell of this place was strange. It had a distant aroma that seemed to be everywhere. Even the creeks and rivers inside the jungle seemed to emit the faint smell.

I pushed past the insignificant scent and searched for the more pressing odor. My nostrils twitched as I took a silent sniff of the air. My nose scrunched back as my lips curled into a smile. The yip of the fox returned, seeming ever so calm.

I stepped through the brush and into a clearing, my body tensing slightly. Out near the center of the clearing...

My mouth slightly gaped, I exhaled. 'Destined... never to be caught!' My hands clenched as I grunted slightly. The vulpine's fur was mostly flaming red, from nose to tail. Unlike most foxes, the tip of it's tail was not black nor were its paws white, instead being the same red as the rest of it's body.

It's eyes were a golden shine, having no pupils whatsoever. The only parts of its body, aside from the golden eyes, that weren't red were it's black nose... and the strange black glyph marks spread across it's body. The markings looked ancient, Romanian or Egyptian...

The fox was massive by average vulpine standards but not as large as the legends had it out to be...

I stepped into the clearing, but it didn't even acknowledge my presence here. For something so destined to never be caught... I was surprised to find it so carefree. Instead of fleeing, the beast simply started grooming itself.

I continued to pace forwards, stomping ever louder as I approached to try and gain it's attention. Earlier moments arose in my mind. I had recently snuck up on it, but when I pounced to snare the beast, it simply vaporized into a sparkling dust... well, not this time.

I kept moving forwards. As I got near, the beast looked to me, tilted its head to one side, then again resumed grooming itself. “Ugh! HEY!” I growled but it ignored me. I was left in a state of shock. The fact it didn't even try to run... that it simply treated me as though I wasn't a threat...

I snarled loudly, so that it could hear me. 'Shouldn't it be running?' I thought quietly. I sniffed the air and smirked... well, he'd have quite a surprise coming his... or maybe, her way... its way.

I walked forwards and stopped just a mere few feet away. While it sat on it's rump, the beast stood just a bare inch taller than me. I huffed out my nose but it still ignored me. I scrunched my facial features and swiftly reached out to grab it.

As my right arm darted for the beast's neck. Before my arm even reached it, the fox slipped behind me in a blur of motion and kicked me in the back, sending me tumbling forwards. Pushing against my heel, I launched myself back at the beast, grunting as I went to deliver an elbow strike to the base of its neck.

Whilst still licking its left paw, the beast swiftly, and most calmly, slapped its free paw at my exposed ribs. The blow was brutal. With an angered grunt I pivoted my body and swung with a hard left.

With the same free paw, the creature gave an effortless, yet staggering, blow to my diaphragm. I gasped loudly as spit and blood spewed from my mouth and the wind was knocked from my body. “UGH, HGHNGH!”

I stepped back, regaining my posture. The beast looked to my spat blood that had landed on its fur and licked it off. “NGH!” I grunted in disbelief. It was mocking me... making a fool of me!

Wiping the blood from my lips, I smirked. “Alright... no more playing around!” I warned audibly but still the creature calmly groomed itself. I bolted forwards and threw a volley of quick jabs. To my utter shock, the beast simply dodged its head from side to side and avoided every single blow.

With a final blow, I let out a roar as I threw a mighty punch with my left. In an instant the creature used its free paw and caught my punch, stopping my blow in mid stride. I grunted in disbelief. For a brief moment the vulpine stopped licking its other paw, tongue still extended as though time had stopped.

I huffed but before I could do anything else, the giant fox swung my body over its own, flipping me head over heels and ramming my body into the ground, my back breaking my fall with a loud crash.

The brutal impact left a small crater, dirt and debris flying up with my crash. The creature inhaled, mingled away a few steps, sat back down then started grooming itself again. With staggering discomfort, I once again stood to my feet, blood oozing from my mouth. Rolling my shoulders, I stretched out my already sore body.

I chuckled to myself, closing my eye and sighing as I dipped my head. I spoke out to the creature, eye still closed. “You know... for a creature as legendary as yourself... you really are a fool...” I trailed off, opening my eye as I looked up.

With lightning fast movement, I rushed at the beast, letting out a roar as I cocked back my right arm and threw a heavy punch at the beast. With effortless motions, the beast tilted its head to one side, while still grooming itself and flicked its tail against my abdomen. The blow was crushing, sending me stumbling back, gasping for air, eye wide as a saucer.

Lifting its head up from grooming itself, the vulpine twirled in a graceful manner and swished its tail against the side of my shoulder. Though a seemingly blissful motion, the impact from the hit was so intense it sent me catapulting across the clearing, crashing brutally through trees and into a boulder which broke my motion that would've probably sent me flying another few hundred feet.

I huffed for air, my body now littered with scratches and cuts. Standing up only a moment after I had been stopped by a boulder, I pressed my left hand into my right shoulder and relocated it into the proper position.

Arching my back I readied myself for, what I was sure to be, the fight of my life. Instead I was stunned to see, in the far off clearing I had recently been in, the vulpine grooming itself again. I was panting heavily. “Wow... he... she... its good!” I grunted.

Flexing my entire body, I rushed forwards with gaining speeds. As I built up momentum I began to roar. I felt flashes of electricity sparking off my feet with each step, as though my legs were strikes of lightning that left charred marks were they stepped.

I moved at a blinding speed. At such a fast speed the creature was only able to barely look at me as I jumped through the air and delivered a powerful blow. Kicking hard, my boot tip connected with the side of the fox's head, lighting striking out from my foot and frying some of the creature's fur.

The kick sent the fox tumbling aside but it quickly sat back upright. I curled its lips, now ready to fight... 'Heh! About time!' I thought to myself, now ready to see what the Teumessian Fox was really made of.

I readied myself in a combat stance. With blinding speed the fox rushed at me. I crossed my arms up in front of my body in a form of block. The fox's strike was painful and sent me skidding back, my arms blown to my sides from the sheer force. Before I could even blink the fox was in my face and struck my exposed gut with a fury of paw strikes.

The motions were just blurs and every strike sent me a few steps back but even then the fox was always in my face. Stopping for the briefest moment, the fox twirled in a one-eighty motion then booted me with both hind legs, sending me crashing through several trees.

I kept my footing and skidded to a stop. 'Wow... for something that's destined never to be caught... he's good at fighting!' I thought through a wince. Just as I went to rush back to the fight, the fox materialized in front of me with a sly look on its face. My expression turned to one of shock.

In a flash it simply headbutted me to the ground. Though just a mere headbutt, the force of the strike had enough kinetic energy to crater my body into the ground. With a push, I flipped myself backwards, making sure to kick my boot into the creature's chin while I was at it.

I landed on my feet in a hunched position, quickly launching myself forwards and driving home a punch to the fox's gut. The hit was enough to deter my foe and allow for a second strike. However, after that my enemy was back on the offensive, slapping me with that tail of his and sending me back into the clearing.

I staggered to my feet. I needed to end this, and now. Maybe another time I'd have a chance to prove my abilities but I was obviously outmatched this time. As I tensed my body, some of my torn shirt fell off my body. Flaps of torn fabric hung off my jeans. The only garment of clothing that remained intact were my boots.

The fox zipped into the clearing. I crouched low and as the beast leapt at me, I kicked hard with a roar of anger. The impact force of my kick sent it hurtling into the air. Regaining its posture mid flight, the beast scowled at me.

I smirked. “NOW!” I roared out and with that, a manticore... my manticore, flew out of the forest and dive bombed towards the giant fox. It only had time to turn its head over its shoulders as my hulking friend slapped its scorpion tail across the back of the fox.

The Teumessian Fox was sent hurtling into the ground, crashing with such force I nearly felt the vibrations in my feet. Flying downwards with increasing speeds, my manticore roared out loudly.

However, just before landing the finishing body slam that would've most likely incapacitated the fox, the sly vulpine simply slipped out from the manticore's path. My friend crashed into the ground, an eruption of dirt and rocks shooting up out of the now larger crater.

The manticore stood up but only managed that as the fox lightly tapped my friend on the back of his neck with that damned tail. The seemingly light blow was enough to make my ally's eyes roll back while he fell forwards without a sound.

My jaw dropped. The clouds in the sky moved along, the crescent moon coming into view and shinning down upon the world... upon me. I grunted as my body tensed. “NGH... UGHAHHH!” I roared out.

Wind started to gust around me, at first lightly then before long it was rushing about like a storm. Veins bulged from underneath my skin, muscles flexing and expanding further than before. I reached a slightly larger mass as a dim blue aura started to surround me. As seconds progressed the aura became ever brighter though the hue was a dark flaming color.

Before long a dark midnight blue flaming aura encased my body, burning outwards as electricity started to course around my body.

As the aura intensified, my eye patch was blown off, revealing my damaged eye. A pupil came into view which shifted into a vertical slant. My eye glowed dark blue, fuming off jet dark smoke. “COME NOW... AND FACE ME!” I challenged the fox.

The beast at first simply began grooming itself again, as though to mock my new power. I moved my body in an instant, seemingly teleporting to his side. The creature's eyes went wide but nothing else. I hammered a powerful punch across its jaw, electricity spurting from the impact and sending the creature bouncing away.

In seconds it was back on its paws. I smiled darkly. “Indeed... now, are we going to get serious?” I taunted and the beast didn't need to be asked twice. It rushed forwards at blazing speeds, its fur seeming to release burning red flames as it rushed at me.

Stepping lively, I merely sidestepped its pounce and drove a quick jab to its ribs that knocked the wind out of him.

The beast wheezed but didn't have a chance for anything else as I clasped my hands together and drove a hard blow to its back that crashed it into the ground with a fume of dirt puffing upwards.

In a flash, the beast cocked back its tail and slapped hard, slamming a strike to the side of my head. I tensed and held my ground, taking the full brunt of the blow. My head cocked to the side, the fox snickered at first but then went slack jawed as I cocked my head back towards it.

“That one... was free!” I snarled as I grabbed its tail and began twirling our bodies in circles. Finally gaining enough momentum, I let the beast go, flinging its body high into the air. Stepping my right foot back, I cocked my arms at my sides, palms cupped together. “Let's see how you like this...” I commented under my breath.

I felt warmth in the palms of my hands. My body tensed, the ground beneath me shaking. Breaking the surface of the forest floor, my feet dug into the dirt while the ground around me began to crack and split, small rocky protrusion springing up.

The energy between my hands crackled and sparked, building up pressure and force. My eyes squinted, fuming dark smoke still coming from my damaged eye. My brows furrowed down, sweat beading down my face.

My body shook as I contained the ever increasing power of energy that resided between my palms. Clouds swept across the skies, looming darkness over parts of the lands. In the depths of the darkness was the illumination of my dark blue energy, still growing in power.

The Teumessian Fox regained its posture in the air and looked downwards, struck in shock. Lightning crackled out from my hands, blazing across the planet's surface nearby and even tearing down trees. Deep trenches were cut into the earth as the lightning from my hands crackled about, slicing open the ground around us.

There was nowhere for it to go. This ended here, tonight. I stomped my right foot forwards, swinging my arms in front and aiming straight for the fox that stayed lingering in the skies. I let out one final roar and exerted everything I had, draining all my power into the intensified blast.

The recoil was severe, pushing my rigid body backwards, creating ruts in the ground were my feet skidded past. Even the trees behind me were pushed back as though caught in a storm. The beam broadened out as it left the confines of my palms. The Teumessian Fox's eyes went wide. Having realized it should have ran when it had the chance, it resorted to a last ditch effort. Opening its mouth, a red beam shot out and towards my own blast.

The two beams of energy collided for a brief moment before his was absorbed by mine and continued towards him. I don't even know if it made a sound when the blast struck him. The energy beam erupted into a fiery explosion that shook the very ground beneath me.

Seconds past by, smoke emulating from the explosion. Clouds covered the moon's shine upon the world, leaving me in darkness. My aura, along with the electricity, faded from my body. I felt exhausted, wiped... beat.

The smoking body of the Teumessian Fox plummeted from the sky, still smoldering from the blast. Amazingly its fur was still intact and in some spots, red fur remained. I coughed and reached deep for any remaining strength. Finding it, I grabbed the lasso that resided on the back of my hip, clung to my belt.

I twirled it over my head like some stereotypical cowpoke and whipped it at the descending fox. The lasso looped around the fox's body and snared tightly, the whole rope glowing dark blue. I yanked it in, viciously pulling it towards me.

I grabbed the giant fox in my burly hands, holding it by tuffs of fur. The rope squeezed tightly, the dark blue aura around it brightly shinning. The fox squirmed weakly. In it's state, courtesy of my energy blast, it hadn't the strength to break free of the magical lasso.

My manticore friend stood up shakily from behind me and I let out a whispered gasp. The fox hadn't killed him, just rendered him unconscious... though I bet he could've killed him if he wanted to. “Huh... heh...” I chuckled, looking at the defeated fox... the one who by legend was destined never to be caught...

“I've caught you...” I snarled and the fox writhered in my hands. I exhaled deeply. I realized in my mind that despite not offering a whole lot of support, I couldn't have done this without my manticore's help. “Hmm...” I unwrapped the fox from the bindings of the lasso and gently set him on the ground. “Or have I?” I asked rhetorically.

The fox blinked in confusion, unsure of what was happening. My manticore stepped up beside me and I handed him a fish, though mushed to pulp from the fight. My... thing, ate the food with grace. I looked to the fox as the manticore enjoyed its treat. “I hope to meet you again someday... and to best you in battle, mono e mono,” I told the fox.

Standing up, the fox stretched out. I swear, from the corner of its lips, I saw a smile. It started to walk away but stopped a few yards from me, turned back and held its paw up beneath its mouth. With a gentle blow, red sparkling dust puffed towards me. The dust turned into the shape of a heart and splashed against me.

I felt a tingling in my nose and sneezed hard. I felt... slightly different, I wasn't sure how but knew something about me had changed. As I recovered from my sneeze, I realized the fox had dissapeared.

“I really hope it was a she or I'm gonna feel really...”

* * *

Burdy's perspective...

I awoke rather silently. Not a single grunt, groan or cursed mutter left my mouth. I felt the hair on the back of my neck prickle up as the heat from Celestia's sun, amplified by my basement window, bathed on my skin. I went to stroke back my hair then realized how short it was.

“Mmm...” I yawned. I stretched out wide, beams of light shinning past me and making all the fine particles of dust gleam. I blinked several times before reaching for my eye patch and slipping it on.

I didn't bother with my necklace or watch, knowing full well I'd need a shower. I could feel the dried sweat on my body, the stickiness of it. I grabbed some clean clothes from my dresser and proceeded upstairs.

It only took me a moment to slip into the bathroom, start the shower and slip out of my boxers. Just as I was about to step into the shower I stopped dead in my tracks. I held my finger out as if to make a point across to somepony. “Uhhh... uhm... hold on...” I muttered to myself.

There was something... “Bah, if it was important I'd know,” I said as I jumped into the shower. I let myself relax in the heated water. “Ahhh...” I sighed in comfort. A luxury most take for granted, I always enjoyed a good warm shower, hell just warm water.

I quickly soaped up, using that new grape stuff. I twitched my nose as I sniffed the bottle. “Definitely something wrong with those grapes... or maybe this shampoo has gone bad?” I chuckled to myself.

I washed off and quickly ended my shower. Steam smogged the bathroom, fogging the mirror and window. Just as I went to step out I stopped mid stride. “!” I gasped. I dipped my head as I let out a long groan.

I had forgotten a towel again. I banged my hand against the shower walls in distress. “Ahh fu-” I was cut off by the sound of Lassie rapping on the bathroom door.

“Hey... you in there? Applejack wants to talk to you,” she called out and I fist pumped the air.

“Yeah, the door's open. Lassie, I need a towel,” I said and I heard her snicker, saying something about 'Again? Figures, dunce.'

I used the shower curtain to conceal myself as she walked inside, hopped up to her hind legs and fetched me a towel. As she turned to hand me the towel, she cocked an eye brow and gave me a once over.

“What are you doing?” she asked, motioning towards the shower curtain.

“To conceal myself,” I replied. She rolled her eyes and just tossed me the towel.

“Have fun with that,” she mentioned. I rose a brow in wonder by what she meant by that.

As I took the towel and stepped back from the curtains, I realized they were the see through curtains and not the colored kind. I slapped a hand over my face as I sighed. “Oh my goddess...” I quickly toweled off and stepped out, slipping on my fresh set of apparel. I stepped lively, leaving the towel on the hanger.

I walked out into the library area feeling refreshed. At the door stood the farmer pony... my kinda friend... I guess. We never really hung out, I just helped her out from time to time. Heck, I spent more time with Big Mac than her... ah that's it. She was my friend's sister I guess.

I stepped up to the door and gave her a nod. “What's shakin?” I asked and she rose a brow.

“Shakin?” she asked and I just shook my head.

“Uhm... what's up?” I asked more blatantly.

“Oh... uhh... say, what were yah'll doin the other day?” she asked interrogatively.

“Uhm... uhh... well... had breakfast, went to Rarity's to pick up my truck then went with Ma to go learn some spells... had a picnic with Derpy later on too.” I scratched the back of my head, “Not much really,” I stated and she sighed.

“UGH! Not yesterday, the day before!” she said, almost angry as though I should've known what she was talking about.

“Uhh... pfft... I went to Rarity's and got a haircut?” I asked, wondering why the farmer pony was acting a little agitated.

She rose a brow, giving me a peculiar glare. “And then?” she asked.

“Well... uhh... oh she measured my body so she could make me a suit. Wanted to go to the Grand Galloping Gala and said I had to look nice... suit looks pretty cool actually,” I informed her.

“Anythin... outta the ordinary... somethin' yah wouldn't rightly do on yer own time?” she asked, getting in close to my face with that stare of hers.

“Uhm... well we did go to the spa...” I trailed off as she continued questioning me.

“Yah didn't do anythin' inappropriate... did yah?” she asked. I rose a brow in thought.

“Uhh... well... I did bathe in mud,” I replied and she sighed.

“Ah mean... Rarity didn't talk yah inta doin' somethin'... did she?” she asked.

“Well... I mean... she talked me into going into the spa... well, rather she dragged me in there,” I replied with a chuckle and she rose a brow.

“And... anythin' strange in there happen?” she asked and I furrowed a brow.

“Well... now that you mention it... I'm not sure why I bathed in mud... oh, and the spa pony was relaxing on the job. Something about the changeroom... and they had funny smelling candles,” I replied, leaving out the finer details about the candles and my... fantasy.

“No funny business?” she asked and I laughed.

“Nah. Rarity's pretty serious. I usually do my funny business with Lassie and Derpy. I don't think Rarity would be into sneaking around in a box to escape the hospital.” I chuckled while scratching my chin, remembering all the good times I had doing that.

Applejack sighed and dropped her face into a hoof. “Like talkin' teh a toddler,” she groaned then looked back to me. “Can yah do me a great, big ol' favor... actually, yah'd be doin' Twi a favor too,” she asked and I nodded.

“Can yah stay away from Rarity when yer alone? She's a little weird an... well let's just say we wouldn't want nopony gettin' hurt,” she mentioned and I rose a brow. 'How was Rarity gonna hurt me? Why would she hurt me? Could she even hurt me?' My continuing thoughts were cut off by Applejack's voice. “Just trust me. It'll be better for everypony. Just... if she ever comes around or yah meet her by yerself just... stay in public err somethin', okay?” she asked and I nodded. “Pinkie Pie Promise?” she asked.

I went through the motions as I vaguely remembered them. “Cross my heart, hope to fly, needle in my...” I trailed off as I went to motion a needle in my bad eye. I rearanged my hand over my good eye and made like I stabbed it.

Applejack shuddered. “UGH! Needle in yer eye?” she asked and I nodded.

“Ain't that right?” I asked and she shook her head.

“Nah... Cross muh heart, hope tah fly, stick a cupcake in muh eye,” she said and I chuckled.

“Well... okay, but this one's better cause I have a phobia of needles plus this is my last eye so...” I said as I went to give her props, a sign that we acknowledged my promise to stay outside in public if Rarity and I were ever alone.

We shared a brief chuckle before I thought to myself. “Are you secretly a cop... or detective or something?” I asked and she cocked her head back in shock from the question.

“No... why?” she asked, just as curious as I was.

“Well... why'd you wanna know what I was doing? Alibi?” I asked but she shook her head.

“Just makin' sure Rarity's behavin'...” she trailed off and thought to herself as I thought to myself. 'Behaving... I dunno, she seems high-class and a little uppity, just a little, if somepony were to ask my opinion.'

Just before I could speak, AJ spoke first. “Well, actually... now that yah mention it. Mac's come down with some kinda bug. Real sick like. Might need an extra hoo...err hand when ah go down south tah help muh cousin,” she mentioned.

“Down south eh... hmm... I kinda like the sounds of that,” I said, figuring it perhaps to mean sunny beaches near the equator and stuff like that. “Yeah, definitely. When?” I asked.

“Well... probably leave this weekend. Mornin' train, so be up bright an' early come Sunday. Be down there fer roughly a week err so. Be back Friday, probably in the evening. Right?” she asked and I nodded. That seemed fair enough. I figured I'd be up late tonight with the gala so I'd have tomorrow to sleep than get up early Sunday to go on a vacation.

“Sounds good. Next Saturday's my birthday,” I commented and her ears perked up to the sound of it.

“Saturday... well gee-golly. Ah never knew that,” she commented and I nodded.

“Well I wasn't too knowledgeable about it until my mom mentioned it. Actually she talks about it frequently with me... I think she might be planning something,” I said, remembering how lately she'd remind me every so often that my birthday's coming up and not to be gone that day.

“Alright, we'll make extra sure tah get yah home than,” she mentioned and I nodded.

“I'll be by your house bright and early,” I said and she nodded, telling me to be there before 6am. I thought to myself about time... I needed to remember a schedule or... 'SHIT! THE GALA TRAIN!'

I looked to my watch and my eyes went wide as I realized it was just past 11am, when I said I'd meet Rarity. I was a little hungry but that'd have to wait for now. I rushed around frantically, not exactly sure what I should do. I began slipping on my boots and was about to put on my duster. 'Nope... she's got a suit, remember?' my conscious added in.

I went for my cowboy hat but my conscious again intervened. 'Not fancy. That thing ain't a fedora,' it commented. I began stumbling about, going for the door. I stopped last moment as the smell of fresh, buttered popcorn caught my attention. I turned to see Lassie sitting on her rump, gulping down pawfuls of popcorn, some spilling to the floor, as she watched me.

Twilight trotted out of the kitchen. “Morning-” before she could say another word I rushed forwards, kissed her and Lassie and sputtered out my farewell for the day.

“LOVEYAHGOTTAGOBYE!” I blurted out and with that I zipped out the door, grabbing my wallet from my truck as I left for Rarity's. I zipped down the street, passing several familiar faces as I went by.

Heh... funny really how many ponies I knew now compared to how many I knew a few months back. I scampered up to Rarity's door and simply let myself in, not bothering to knock. Rarity spun to see me, looking slightly distraught.

“Darling! Oh darling, thank goddess. I thought perhaps something awful had happened and tonight's plans were canceled,” she wailed. I looked at my watch. Okay... I was fifteen minutes late... truthfully I was more concerned about the fact I had peacefully slept from 8pm the night before until just recently.

“Sorry, sorry just... showered before I came over,” I mentioned and she let out a sigh.

“Well... at least that's out of the way. Well, I'll just have a quick shower. Do put on the suit and we'll be out of here before you can shake a stick,” she mentioned and with that was off to the upstairs bathroom.

I looked over to the pristine suit. 'Bon-' I cut my thoughts of. 'Burdick, Evan Burdick...' I smirked as I undressed and slipped on the new suit. “Wow... cool!” I mentioned just before I heard something mingle over to my side. I looked down to see Rarity's fluffy white cat.

It rubbed itself against my leg, fluffing its tail up high as it did circles around my ankle. “Ahhh... yes of course,” I said in a sinister tone. I hefted the cat up in my arms and began to stroke it, the said cat purring even louder than before. “One day Whiskers... we will own all our eyes can see,” I said in a low tone. The cat continued to purr and squirmed over onto its back, still in my arms.

I chuckled with a bright smile. “Or just tummy rubs,” I laughed lightly as I began rubbing its tummy. The cat just lay in my arms, enjoying the attention. I walked into the kitchen and searched for biscuits as I continued stroking my new found accomplice... heh.

I finally found Rarity's stash of cookies and cracked a corner off one of the cookies for the cat. Walking back into the living room... or sewing room... whatever the hell it was, I fed the morsel of food to the cat whom ate it with both paws, which was adorably cute... pfft, I was getting too soft.

I set the cat down and waited for a little while... “Huh... Rarity must take long showers...” I muttered, looking to the time. It was nearly quarter to twelve, meaning I had been standing around for nearly half an hour petting her cat. I wondered what in blue blazes she was doing... maybe she's just like one of those ponies that likes long showers.

Finally her presence came into view. My lips parted slightly. Her mane and fur had a most stunning shine that was only bested by the ridiculously fashionable dress. I mean, there was nice and then there's overdoing it... she was going beyond both of those.

She had eyeliner, makeup, even shoes... I scratched on side of my forehead with my index finger. Rarity stepped up in front of me and swished her mane. “How do I look darling?” she asked and I twitched my jaw to one side.

A single sound escaped my mouth before I caught a grip on something nice to say before I bumbled out something like 'Try-hard' or 'Over-done'. “Purty fine,” I replied then bit my lip. That didn't come out as well as it had sounded in my head, nor did I speak the way I wanted to. “Dazzling,” I stated with a smile and she smiled wider.

“Thank you darling, now come. We must hurry if we want to catch the train,” she ushered me out the door and down the street. The train station wasn't far and I could see that the train had already arrived and was loading passengers.

Arriving at the station, Rarity directed me to a ticket booth. The station attendant looked to me and I scratched my head. “Uhm...” I trailed off. I had never ordered tickets before. I was kinda figuring they were just like buses, just drop change in a booth or something. “Two?” I asked and he nodded, going to retrieve the passes... or tickets, whatever they were. Rarity however, stopped him.

“First class darling. We are royal guests after all,” she announced and I shrugged, looking back to the ticket pony.

“What she said,” I stated, rather blatantly. He handed me the bill and my eyes went wide. I tossed him a few Luna bits from my wallet to cover the expenses then retrieved our tickets. Looking at the tickets I thought aloud. “Huh... so these things are worth a few hundred bits...”

Rarity spoke up. “It's not the tickets so much as the luxury we are serviced to in first class darling. You'll see,” she informed me as we boarded the train. I looked down one aisle, then down the other, then to my ticket. Rarity tugged on my hand and led me closer to the back.

Eventually we reached a cabin car that was kinda swanky to say the least. The seats looked a little more comfy than the other seats and there were cooler curtain drapes. “Come darling, this way,” Rarity led me towards the back and sat us on the one side.

She sat in first and I gave a pouty face. “Nawww... I wanted the window seat... oh wait,” I trailed off as I realized there was a seat opposite her. I slid in and started to get comfy. Rarity looked to me with a most peculiar gaze as I squirmed around to get settled in.

“Have you ever been in first class before darling?” she asked and I shrugged.

“I was only on a train once... and I was kinda too young to remember. I only remembered...” I looked around and finally spotted it. I slid out from my seat and proceeded to the back of the cabin where there was a water dispensary and little white cone cups.

“Oh man... these are sooooo cool,” I said, fascinated by the plain cone cups that were so mezmorizing to me. I poured myself a cup and took a sip. “Yech!” I spat my tongue out. The water was kind of warm and heavily chlorinated. It reminded me of school fountains during hot summer days.

I poured the water out but kept the cup. For the duration of the train ride it would be my cup because... well, there wasn't really any reason other than just because.

I took my seat and got settled in. Another few moments past before the ticket master passed by and punched a whole in our tickets. I looked to the ticket that I had paid so much for. “Huh... guess it's worthless now,” I chuckled as I set it to the side. I looked to Rarity and placed the cone cup on my nose, tip pointing outwards as though I was a bird. After a brief laugh, I set the cup aside and relaxed.

Soon after the train whistled and with that we departed. In moments after leaving the train station I found myself bored, Rarity having occupied herself with a small mirror as she further applied some kind of powder to her face.

I watched her for a little while and eventually she caught my stare. “You know darling, tonight... we're going to be the talk of the gala. Everypony is going to know us...” she trailed off and muttered something under her breath about 'showing that good for nothing...' I couldn't understand the rest.

She gave me a once over. “And I do say darling, you look most stunning. It's easy to make someone fashion ready when they're already as handsome as you,” she said with a bash of her eyelashes. I chuckled, blushing slightly.

“Thanks... ah-ha... I uhh... you look pretty good too,” I replied and she smiled with a sigh.

“You think so darling. To tell you the truth I've been fretting about it slightly and...” she began to ramble on. At first she had my utmost attention but after around an hour of her talking about how stressed she had become... she kinda lost me.

Instead of thoroughly listening, I just leaned my face into my supporting hand and kept nodding like I was intrigued by the story. Even with my new position her rambling got tiring and I found myself lingering off.

She wasn't really paying attention to me and instead was acting out something. At one point she started crying a little but then bucked up and continued going on and on and on... and on... and... on. My eyes started to take longer to blink. I'd rest my eyes for a few seconds than open them, taking a nod like I understood what she was saying.

I shut my eyes at one point then suddenly felt my head slipping down and jerked up in attention. I had passed out. My sudden jerk caught Rarity's attention. “Something wrong darling?” she asked worriedly but I shook my head.

“Sorry... just uhh... not used to train rides,” I replied, partly lying.

“Oh... well, like I was saying-” I was about to dip my head when another voice cut in.

“I thought I recognized you!” said a stallion standing in the aisle. I blinked as I looked at him. I gave him a wide eyed look.

“Uhhhh... uhhhm...” I blinked blankly several times.

“May I?” he asked, motioning to the seat beside Rarity. “I'll only be a moment.” I shrugged. He took a seat. “I knew it was you. I just knew it!” he exclaimed and I continued to blink blankly, Rarity having a similar expression.

“So... I know you from?...” I trailed my question off, letting him pick up.

“Well... actually you don't. I was just... well you see, I read about your adventure up Mount Tia. How you helped that terminally ill mare fulfill her final dying wish,” he mentioned. I placed a hand over my face, stroking it down in a slow manner as I groaned quietly.

'Oh goddess...' I thought inwardly. “Yep... that was me,” I replied in a semi-modest way. He smiled as he extended his hoof. I reach out my hand and shook his hoof firmly. “Nice to meet you Mr.,” I offered.

“Sundrop... Mr. Sundrop. I must say though sir, it's an honor to meet you. I never thought I'd be in the presence of somepony as famous as yourself,” he stammered like some kinda fancolt.

“Nah... you're overdoing it. I'm not some kinda famous, world touring, high-society musician or something. I'm just your average Joe that lives in his mom's basement,” I replied and he blinked in shock.

“W-w-well... surely you could... ah-I-I mean...” he trailed off in shock. “But you climbed to the summit of Mount Tia!” he exclaimed and I shrugged.

“Yeah... I dunno. I just... you know? For the mare, right?” I replied and he was stuck in a state of shock. I twittled my fingers as he just stared at me in disbelief. Maybe it was as though I wasn't everything he was hoping I'd be.

“Well... c-c-can I at least get a picture or something?” he asked and I rose a brow.

“A picture?” I asked in curiosity and he nodded, taking out an old school flash camera. I rubbed my chin as a sly grin went across my face. “Okay, just give me a second.” I ruffled my hair and slipped out of my suit jacket and dress shirt, revealing my bare torso.

The stallion was a little taken back at first. “Here...” I trailed off as I flexed. “Get a picture like this,” I replied and he flashed off several photos. In a matter of seconds the photos developed, faster than what I remembered them back on my world.

He looked to me. “I know I'm probably already bugging you but... could you sign one for each of my family? Just My wife, my daughter and I?” he asked. I shrugged.

“Got a pen?” I asked. He nodded quickly, fishing out a pen from his coat pocket with his mouth.

“My wife's name is Moonstone,” he replied and I rose a brow.

“Moonstone and Sundrop eh?” I chuckled and he nodded with a feverish smile.

“Y-yes... and our daughter's name is Sunny,” he replied. I quickly scribbled down my name on the back of each photo before handing them back. He took each photo, nearly trembling as he held them. “T-thank, thank you so much!” he said as he stood up. "I'll never forget this!"

“No problem. Have a good one-” I was cut off as he simply collapsed. I shot up, one of the train attendants rushing over as well. I felt his pulse. He was alive... and seemingly healthy. His breathing was normal too...

The attendant lifted an eyelid and examined his eye. The mare attendant hefted him up into a vacant seat and began further examining him. After a few moments had past, the stallion came to and I sighed. He had just fainted... heh, fancolt.

I took a seat back down across from Rarity who gave me a genuine smile. “Darling, that was so thoughtful of you,” she chimed and I just rolled my eye.

“Meh... I mean, it's not like I had anything else to do,” I said with a chuckle. “Really... I mean, other than the fact I'm a human, I'm not much different than him. Just a living being,” I said while slipping my shirt and suit jacket back on. Rarity just continued to beam at me.

“Regardless darling...” she took my hand with her hoof and held it dearly. “It was very kind of you.” I just smirked.

“Well... if you say so.” We didn't speak much after that and I just looked out the window, watching the open fields fly past as the train continued to chug along. 'How long is this train ride?' my conscious asked.

'Long, it took me a few hours in the truck and I was going faster than the train,' I replied back and it just groaned.

'Awwww...' there was a slight silence. 'Are we there yet?' it asked and I just groaned inwardly.

'No! And don't play this fucking game!' I growled. I looked out to the mountain. 'See that mountain?' I asked. 'That's where we're going,' I informed myself. Afterwards there was a long peaceful silence which I enjoyed.

Suddenly my conscious interrupted my peace. 'GUESS WHAT?!'

The suddenness of it took me by surprise and I yelped. “GAH, WHAT?!” I gasped, Rarity jerking from my outburst.

“What?! What, what, darling?” she asked in shock, I wiped my brow, breathing heavily.

“Sorry... sorry I just... zoned out. Noise of the...” I trailed off as I turned my head over my shoulder, seeing the food cart rolling along. “The... the attendant and her food cart,” I breathed out.

Rarity looked down the aisle then back to me. “You must really have sensitive hearing for that to shock you in such a way,” she said, still a little in shock. I just panted.

“Yeah I... was really zoned out.” I replied. I dropped my head into a supporting hand and sighed as I spoke to my conscious in secret. 'Okay... what?' I asked irritably and he began to hum a tune.

At first I was confused by the tune, as he mostly just mumbled the lyrics he obviously didn't know. 'Life is a highway!' he shouted out in my mind, the words seeming to echo.

I rolled my eye. 'Great... well, at least you have a nice singing voice,' I thought sarcastically but that didn't stop him from singing. 'At least he has nice instrumental.' I turned to Rarity who was just mingling to herself. “Thanks for coming with me.”

She turned to me with a smile. “Well of course darling. I wouldn't miss this for the world,” she chimed with a beautiful smile. I looked out the window again, leaning my head into my hand. The scenery blew by as the locomotive hugged along.

My conscious just continued singing and... as bad as he was, it was somewhat soothing. I began to doze off, my eye closed longer than it was open half the time. Eventually I found my arms lying on the table, supporting my head. I saw figures in the fields, playing together. I think I was just daydreaming.

I squinted my eye to focus the figures a bit better. There was two that stood on two legs, one taller than all the others and one the shortest. Than the other two stood on all four, one being a dog and the other... 'Heh... I'm daydreaming...' I thought quietly, realizing it was some scene with Lassie, Spike, Twilight and myself all out in the field playing together.

I smiled faintly as my eye closed, my world fading into darkness as my conscious continued his horrible singing...

* * *

I didn't even want to open my eyes. The train shuddered as it moved along the tracks. It was so bitterly cold I could feel my breath as it left my mouth. I was bundled in heavy, rather uncomfortable clothing... though it did keep me warm so I shouldn't complain.

The smell of human defecation made my stomach twist. 'I've had enough of this train ride,' I thought silently to myself, though I didn't really think it... it just sort of rang through my head as if a recording.

My hands were wrapped with fabric, the best I could do for gloves. I felt a hand rest on my shoulder and looked up. I saw the battered face of my old friend yet... I couldn't open my mouth to say his name.

He had several deep scars in his face, partially covered by a medium beard. “Stand up... we're almost there,” he told me, heaving me up. A rifle clacked and rattled as I stood up. Unlike many of the others around me, I had magazine pouches littering my waist.

The train continued to shake along the tracks, several of the men peeking out holes in the shoddy walls of the train car. I went to look as well but my big friend held me back. “Don't look... the anticipation may kill you,” he joked.

A shiver went down my spine. He seemed to notice my nervousness and jest gave me a shake. “Don't worry, it will be fine. You'll see,” he stated. Despite not having a clue what he was speaking of, I had a feeling he was trying to be overly optimistic.

Before I could speak, there was hollering, along with the sounds of incoming planes. The sounds of machine guns firing rang out. With natural instinct I dropped to the floor, just as bullets chewed through the wooden walls of the train. Several men were chopped into mincemeat as German attack planes riddled us like sitting ducks.

The sliding door to the cabin opened and several men fired back with their bolt action rifles in an attempt to defend themselves. Time seemed to slow as I watched a German plane fly low, muzzle flashes lighting up as it hummed along.

Bullets rippled the bodies of several men, tossing them back into heaps on the floor. The door leading to the next train car slid open and Derreck dragged me off my back. “This way! Hurry!” he roared, pulling me along. My feet scampered to catch traction as he heaved me through the door and onto the flat deck of the next train car. On the floor lay a few bodies, riddled with gaping bullet wounds. One man's head was missing, his brain matter spilled all over the ground.

Derreck dropped me and rushed over to a heavy machine gun mounted on a tripod. Just as he reached the gun, I spotted a German fighter coming in low. I gulped, my world blurring around me, screams and gunshots echoing out into silence.

Out of my peripheral vision I saw Derreck pulling back on the charging handle of the big gun. The German plane began to fire it's machine guns, tuffs of dirt spewing up not far from the train.

Just as everything seemed like it was going to end, Derreck let loose with the machine gun. Massive muzzle flashes spat out of the gun, partially redirected to the sides by the gun's muzzle compensator.

The German plane was close enough that I could see the heavy slugs chew the pilot apart, spewing his insides all over the cockpit. Within seconds the plane was shredded from the heavy gun and it careened into the ground, erupting into a ball of flame.

“Suck that, German cunt!” Derreck yelled out, swinging the machine gun in another direction and firing it at high flying planes. Despite being mounted to a tripod, the gun looked as though it kicked like a mule.

Time returned to normal and the booming of Derreck's machine gun rang in my ears. Muzzle flashes sprang out all along the train, soldiers firing back with their rifles and submachine guns.

Before I could cover my ears, Derreck pointed out to a large crate. “AMMO! HURRY!” He roared as his gun ceased firing. I rushed over and cracked open the crate, gabbing a belt of the large anti-material ammunition.

I looped several belts of ammo over my body and carried them over to the empty gun. Derreck flung open the top of the gun and rushed the belt of ammo into the weapon. Just as we were about to close the gun up, I caught sight of a fighter plane flying in low. My eyes went wide and I pulled both Derreck and I to the ground, shielding his body with my own as the plane littered the train with bullets.

Splinters of wood jabbed me in the cheeks as bullets narrowly missed our bodies. Before the plane had even passed over our bodies, Derreck pushed me off and was grabbing at the charging handle of the weapon.

In seconds he was back in the game, putting German fighters out of action. In the midst of the chaos, I spotted a German bomber coming in for a pass. “Derreck!” I yelled, motioning to the bomber and shifting his attention.

He swung the business end of the gun towards the bomber but only managed to get off a handful of shots before the gun ran dry. Our eyes went wide. “SHIT!” Derreck yelled rushing my way and tackling my body off the open deck train car. The bomber flew low and dropped its payload. The explosion ripped apart the train but the resulting blast still struck us, sending us catapulting even further away.

For such a short time, I felt as though my world was in an eternity of pain. My vision came in and out of blurred darkness. I stared at the dark gray sky, the flames of war illuminating the world below.

I heard Derreck calling my name, but it seemed so distant with my temporarily impaired hearing. He grabbed me by the collar of my coat. “Hey... hey! Wake up... wake up!” he yelled and I began to faze out. “WAKE UP... WAKE UP!” His hands seemed to smooth out into larger single masses rather than palms and fingers. “Hey... hey, wake up already...”

* * *

I was startled awake, my eyes wide as I gasped for air. Rarity jumped back in her seat, startled from my abrupt awakening that she had most likely caused. In seconds I settled, realizing that the dream was just a dream.

I tried to think back on it but couldn't seem to come up with any recollection of what I had dreampt about. Rarity looked to me with a slight bit of worry. “Darling, are you... okay?” she asked and I nodded with a sigh.

“Fine-fine... just... just startled.” I had a growing urgency in my bladder and groaned. “Ugh... I gotta use the washroom.” I stood up and as I did, realized the train was traveling through some kind of mountain passage. 'Must be getting close,' I thought to myself, remembering the one time I had been before with Twilight. We had taken my truck opposed to the train and I remembered having to ascend a path that wound up the sides of a mountain to get to the big city.

I walked down the illuminated aisle of the train and to the back of the cabin car where there was a washroom on each side of the walkway. I turned to the washroom door on the right side but the little slip near the handle said it was occupied. I turned around but as I looked to the second washroom door I was greeted by a 'Out of service' sign.

'SHIT!' I thought to myself, doing a little dance as I tried to hold back my need to go. Figures all I could think about at this point was waterfalls. I began to dance on my tippy-toes as I fidgeted, wondering what it is I should do.

I looked down the aisle, only to see there was no longer an attendant. 'First class my ass...' I thought to myself, looking back to the sign. 'Well... I only need to take a leak... not like I need to flush or anything...' I thought to myself.

I gripped the door knob and tried to turn it but found it was locked stiff. “Ugh! Mpfft!” I gasped, holding back my need to answer nature's call. In my frustration, I accidentally squeezed the knob too hard and pulled it free. “GAH... GUH!” I gasped, the handle's inner working's being revealed.

I needed to go... bad. I looked over my shoulder, still seeing no sign of the attendant... though I did see her cart.

“Ohh pfft... dammit!” I groaned, taking a quick look at the inner working's of the door. The lock was a simple one, the only trouble would be turning the internals with my big fingers. I'd need something small... like a toothpick but sturdy like steel...

I looked over to the cart and spotted some utensils, specifically the forks. I grabbed one and bent the middle tines down. With the middle ones out of the way, I bent the outer tines closer together so I could use them to turn the internals of the door and work the lug piece.

It took a bit of fidgeting but finally I got it. I swung the door open with a relieved exhale, only to be greeted by the scream of the attendant mare and the gasp of a pegasus stallion. The mare had cream white fur with a blonde mane.

She quickly tried to button up her blouse, covering up her breasts with a free hoof. The stallion nabbed my attention as he tried to conceal his lower region with some kinda blue leotard suit.

His mane was a very dark grayish blue, while his fur on the other hand was a very pale blue. His green eyes darted to me with a gasp as he yelled out in shock. “GAH! GET OUTTA HERE!” He yelped.

I leaned back and looked to the door sign. I cocked an eyebrow as I looked back to them. “So... does this mean this washroom isn't out of service?” I asked blankly. The mare shot me a glare then slammed the door in my face.

“UGH! DICKS!” I grunted, holding my crotch as I started to dance again. I frowned and looked to the busted door knob. “Okay... wanna leave an out of service sign up so you can take a nice relaxing shit without anypony bothering you...” I snarled, picking up my fork.

“Take a nice relaxing shit!” I growled, jamming the fork tines into the door handle's inner workings and breaking them off, jamming the door from working. Just as I stepped back and smirked, the cabin door leading to the next train opened up.

A light brown mare with a dark brown mane and attendant uniform stepped through. “Uhm... excuse me, Miss?” I asked, catching her attention. “This washroom door is broken and... uhm, is there another washroom I can use?” I asked in discomfort. She nodded and pointed down the aisle of the next train car.

“Next train car after that one, back left door,” she informed me. I gave her a nod and rushed along, snickering to myself as I looked over my shoulder and to the jammed door.

Chapter 48

'I didn't sign up for this...'

Rarity tugged me along, my jaw slack from the sheer amazement. I had been to Canterlot before, albeit briefly. Having not paid attention the first time, I was making up for it. Smells of pastries and baked goods caught my nostrils, perking up the hair on the back of my neck. Boy was I glad I brought my wallet.

Rarity gave me a yank. “Come along darling or we'll be late!” Rarity pitched and I just kept nodding with a mumbled 'Uh-huh.'

There were neon lights on several building signs and the street lamps were brighter than the ones back home in Ponyville... and a lot fancier too. The main street was cobblestone and the sidewalk looked like regular pavement but shined to a glossy smooth sheen.

Business windows had dresses, suits, televisions, radios... I stopped dead in my tracks, looking with awe at the pastry shops. Rarity huffed as she tried to yank me but my body didn't even budge a millimeter. “COME ON DARLING! THERE'S FOOD THERE! IT'S FREE!” She yelled, breaking me out of my trance.

“Right! Than what are we waiting for?! Let's hurry!” I said, heaving her up into my arms and racing down the street. In seconds I realized I had no idea where I was going and was gifted by the sound of Rarity directing me which way to go... though her voice was a bit high pitched and annoying at times.

“Left, no right... go right, right, RIGHT! Left, leftleftleftLEFT! Down this alley here, no here... I mean this one. Down here, around there... TO THE CASTLE DARLING!”

I looked around, dazed by the sheer mass of the city that seemed to be engulfing me. I was struck with a sense of... claustrophobia. My world began to spin and I caught view of the castle. Mind slipping, I fell a whirlwind of electricity start to surround both our bodies. Rarity peeped out in worry. “Darling?-” but I didn't hear the rest.

Everything slipped and before I knew it I stumbled forwards, tumbling into a few well dressed ponies. “UGH! Sorry, my bad, apologies, my fault...” I stuttered, gaining my footing as I still held my friend in my arms.

I blinked, having no idea how I'd gotten here. Somepony's aggravated voice caught my attention. “Hey buddy, watch where you're going!” he yelled and I flinched nervously. I shook off the shock and set Rarity down as we were bestowed by the sight of Canterlot Castle.

“Woah... that's big,” I muttered and Rarity nodded.

“Well of course it is. Come along darling, this way,” she said, leading me around to a less crowded entrance. We walked through the entrance and were greeted by guards. Rarity leaned over. “Show them the invitations sweetheart,” she said and I cocked a brow.

'Sweetheart?' I didn't think much else as I handed over the two slips that I had gotten in the mail. The guards looked at them, at first with with an uninterested look but I guess they read something they weren't readily expecting because their eyes went wide with shock.

“Uh! Sir, madam, just this way!” They both gasped, separating to each side of the door and standing rigid and tall like some ancient statue pillar.

“Uhh... thanks,” I replied, taking back my tickets and proceeding inside with Rarity. At first I was just walking along with a casual stride but then I noticed Rarity's trot. She was walking with grace... elegance... like royalty. 'UGH! Guess I should walk with pride!' I thought silently, straightening my back and walking properly.

“The main room's this way darling. I'm sure Princess Celestia would like to speak with you,” she mentioned. We made our way through a large set of fancy doors and were basked in a golden aura of light that nearly blinded me.

My jaw nearly went slack. The floors nearly felt slippery they were so smooth and... it was almost as if it were some kind of fogged mirror. I could see the silhouette of my reflection in the floor. Ponies in fancy dresses and suits littered the place, socializing together and mingling around.

I lost my footing for just a moment and stumbled a little. 'Wow... this place really is something,' I thought to myself. 'Must be why it's called THE Grand Galloping Gala.'

There were several large pillars scattered around the room and cool paintings on the walls. I looked up and saw a massive chandelier suspended in the air. “Woah... it's like a Disney princess movie...” I muttered, stumbling a little more. Rarity stopped me and I looked down to her. “Don't suppose yer wearin glass shoes?” I stuttered out.

She was taken aback by the question. “Glass shoes? Why in Equestria would I wear glass shoes? That's an awful choice of footwear. Why, if the glass were to break than the wearer would undoubtedly have glass shards cut into their hooves...” she informed me and I just shook my head.

“Sorry-sorry... just... caught up in my thoughts,” I apologized as I kept stepping around in circles. Rarity once again took hold of my hand and stopped me.

“Darling... is something wrong?” she asked and at first I nodded then shook my head.

“Ye-no. No, nothing's wrong. Just a lot to take in is all,” I stammered. “Wow... so this is the Grand Galloping Gala.” She giggled.

“No darling. Actually this is a lounging area. There's more to the gala than just this.” I looked down to her and she smiled. “Come this way.” She tugged me along and began showing me the sights. There was a ball room, an art room, some place outside with a garden and there was another lounging place outside with gazebos and little bridges over small rivers...

We entered into another room that was filled with a sensational aroma. My stomach grumbled and thinking back on it... I hadn't eaten all day. I was about to walk over to a table covered with pastries but Rarity kept tugging me along. “Ugh! Uh-hey... can we just-” I was cut off by the seemingly determined mare, though determined for what I wasn't sure.

“Come along darling, this way,” she said and I tried to reach for some food but to no avail. “We can come back here later, but right now we need to find somepony,” she told me.

“We do?” I asked and she nodded. “Who?” I asked but never got a definitive reply.

“Don't worry sweetheart, it's nopony important,” she told me and I cocked a brow.

“Well... if it's nopony important, can I at least get something to eat first?” I asked but she shook her head.

“He's nopony important but seeing him is,” she told me and I twitched my lower jaw to one side and furrowed my brows. In the end I decided to just roll with it since she seemed to know where everything was. I stumbled along behind her, following her through the crowds as we made our way to the mystery guy... stallion, mystery stallion.

I looked to my suit getup. In reminiscent thought, I again imagined myself to be James Bond. In a voice reminding me of Judi Dench, my conscious spoke. '007, The stallion you're looking for is your contact for this mission, 004...' I snickered silently to myself. 'Burdick... Evan Burdick, but yah'll can call me Burdy if yah fancy.'

Rarity muttered small curses to herself, mostly complaining about where this stallion was and why it had to be so hard to find him. Finally she stopped dead in her tracks, leaving me to nearly stumble over her from the abrupt stop. “There he is... okay darling, come this way,” she led me across the lounge room... which may have been bigger than the library back home...

She stopped and turned to me. I looked around, searching for a stallion who fit the personification of a secret agent... 'Oh wait... no, we're not actually spies...' I thought to myself. Rarity hopped up to her hindlegs, wrapping her hooves around my neck.

“Okay, kiss me darling,” she told me and I rose a brow.

At first I let out a single chuckle, figuring it was some kind of joke. “Huh... uhh.. wait, what?” I stammered out a laugh. She rolled her eyes with a sigh, then leaned in. Her eyes shut rather naturally as she pressed her lips to mine.

My eyes went wide as she began pushing against me. In my state of shock, my feet followed her movements as she pushed me back and before I knew it, I had bumped into somepony. I broke from the kiss and gasped as I stumbled about.

I turned around to apologize to the pony I backed into, only to be greeted by the agitated look of a well dressed stallion. He looked kinda... I dunno... cliché. Blonde mane, blue eyes, well groomed, white... maybe light gray fur. He was well dressed with a blue bowtie and a collar shirt... or maybe it was...

I looked him over to see if it was perhaps just some kinda clothing that was just tied to his chest rather than a full shirt. I didn't see a cutoff along his body which led me to believe it wasn't a shirt, but in retrospect how exactly would the collar thing stay on his chest without some kind of lace to hold it there...

“S-s-sorry,” I stammered and he began to brush off his shoulder with a look of distaste. Rarity stepped around to my side and spoke in a rather posh tone.

“Oh, well hello there... Prince Blueblood,” she said his name almost like she had gritted her teeth. He looked over, rose a brow then proceeded to huff on his hoof and rub it against his chest as though to clean it.

“Oh. Hello... you,” he replied, almost in the same tone Rarity had spoken to him with. Rarity's jaw dropped.

“You... you?! YOU?! That's all you have to say is you?” She asked in an irritated tone. I rose a brow. So this was 004... err, whoever he was. The stallion twirled his head to one side, swishing his mane and closing his eyes like he was some kinda fashion model.

“Well... it seems as though I've forgotten your name,” he replied smugly. Man... I barely even knew this guy and he sounded kinda like a douche. Rarity scoffed.

“Forgotten me? Well rest assured I haven't forgotten about you!” Rarity's tone was almost a snarl. The stallion smirked.

“It's pretty hard to forget somepony as handsome and as dashing as me,” he said in a smug-like tone with a smile, one of his teeth gleaming. 'Yup, he's a douche,' I thought silently though left my expression blank.

Rarity's body went rigid. “UGH! Why you sniveling little snot nose brat-” she began but the stallion just laughed heartily.

“Oh yes... I remember you now. Hard to forget somepony who is so quick to resort to such primitive forms of aggression,” he chuckled. Rarity tensed and I could tell things were getting heated between the two of them... though this stallion seemed to keep his composure better than Rarity... I wondered what their history was.

In caution, I stepped back but ended up backing into yet another pony. 'UGH! Why does this place have to be so crowded?!' I thought silently as I spun on my heels to apologize. To my shock, both myself and the pony I presumed I had bumped into said nearly the same thing.

“My apologies,” the stallion said as I blurted out “My bad.” We stood stationary, him looking up to me as I looked down to him. Our height difference was obvious and silence between the two of us was cut off by Rarity and that stallion arguing in the background.

“Uhh... sorry, I was just giving them some space,” I mentioned, pointing over my shoulder. The stallion perked my senses. Something seemed... off about him. He didn't seem all that agitated that I had bumped into him. He was a fair build like most stallions, a blue mane and white fur and was dressed in a finely tailored suit jacket. One particular thing that caught me was his little blue mustache... I guess I just wasn't used to blue mustaches. His gentle light blue eyes gave me a long, interested once over.

I looked to the mare beside him and rose a brow. She on the other hand seemed less than impressed of my presence here. She was taller than the stallion and was quite slender. Her fur was pale white and her mane was girly pink while her purple eyes seemed to... piece me with a glare. I guess she wasn't to impressed by the fact I had bumped into her friend.

However as we stood there in relative silence, I realized there was a spill on the mare's fur, a drink perhaps. In that moment I realized why she was glaring at me. “Ma'am, I'm so sorry. I'm a little... clumsy, you could say,” I apologized sincerely. She twitched her lip in an unimpressed way as she spoke.

“Yes. You could say that,” she replied. The stallion rubbed his chin as he was stuck in a train of silent thought. He took his hoof away from his chin and held it up as though a light bulb had just flicked on.

“Oh! Of course! You're that jammy good chap, aren't you?” he asked, lowering his monocle that I hadn't realized he was wearing. I went pale faced as I rose a brow. His sudden tone of excitement had also caught the attention of Blueblood and Rarity.

Blueblood left his argument with Rarity to speak with this stallion. “Well hello Fancy Pants. So good of you to make it to the gala,” he said in a royal voice. The stallion simply brushed off his greeting to speak with me a little more.

“Yes-yes Blueblood, wonderful," he said then turned to his wife. "Darling this is that good chap... uhm, Burdick I think his name was,” the stallion mentioned and extended his hoof for me to shake. “Fancy Pants,” he greeted. At this point Rartiy came to my side, wrapping one of her hooves around my left hand.

I used my right hand to shake his hoof. “Uhh... Burdick, sir... Evan Burdick. I guess you knew that already... but yah can call me Burdy if yah fancy,” I bumbled out, kind of puzzled as to how this guy knew me.

“Yes-yes. Of course! That was it! Burdick, the legendary stallio... uhm... chap,” he exclaimed and I just blinked. “Yes, anyway. Darling,” he turned to the mare beside him. “This is that jammy chap who climbed Mount Tia with that sick mare to help her fulfill her final dying wish. Was in the newspapers. Remember?” he asked and the mare gasped, holding a hoof to her chest.

“My apologies dear sir. I had no idea we were in the presence of a legendary hero such as yourself,” she told me and I just chuckled, brushing off the appraise.

“Well... ah ain't no hero... hardly the thing teh call heroic,” I chuckled out, not speaking properly due to my timidness about the issue.

Fancy Pants nodded and the mare held out her hoof. In this moment I realized I should act more... high class. “Fleur-de-lis,” she greeted me.

I gently took her hoof, lifting it to my mouth and planting a gentlemanly kiss on her soft fur. “Ma'am,” I replied, giving a nod. She giggled with a blush as Fancy Pants chuckled.

“Modest too! Well you don't find that much nowadays now do we honey?” he asked. The other stallion, 004, spoke up.

“Yes, indeed. So, Fancy Pants, how have you-” but he was abruptly cut off by the stallion in sentence.

“Yes-yes Blueblood, in a little while,” he completely blew off the stallion and turned back to me, then looked to my side. “Ahh, yes. Miss Rarity. It has been quite some time. Glad to finally see you again!” he said with appropriate excitement in his voice. “Well, they say curiosity killed the cat but I must know... how is it you two know each other?” he asked. I was about to answer but Rarity spoke first.

“He's my coltfriend,” she lied. I rose a brow and Fancy Pants' expression turned to a bright smile.

“Well, I do say... it mustn't have been easy to nab this one, but you do certainly have your ways,” he said. I was about to intervene when Rarity pulled my head down, turning me to whisper into my ear.

“Sssh, don't say a thing and just roll with it. I need this!” she whispered and I nodded. I stood back up to my full height and gave them a nod.

“Yeah. She really is a knockout... almost knocked me out,” I said with a definitive wink despite my eye patch. I gave a chuckle, to which Fancy Pants added in and turned to his wife.

“Ahh yes... love at first sight. I remember the day I met my wife,” he chimed though the two of them didn't show any affection towards each other at that moment... maybe because we were in public.

Blueblood pitched up but Rarity immediately silence him. “Sush now Blueblood. Adults are talking,” she said calmly and Blueblood stomped his hoof with a huff. Fancy Pants spoke up and nabbed everypony's attention.

“Well, I do say, Burdy I'd love it if you and Miss Rarity were to accompany my wife and I to the dining room for dinner... and maybe a story over a pint or two?” he asked. I looked to Rarity who nodded and I turned back to Fancy Pants and his wife.

“Uhh.. yeah. Err, I mean... Mr. Fancy Pants, I'd be honored,” I replied and he smiled, leading us away. I heard the grunting disbelief of that other stallion. I turned my head over my shoulder and waved to him. “See yah later 004. It was nice meeting you,” I said with a wave.

Fancy Pants looked up to me. “Double-o-four?” he asked curiously.

“Yeah I... uhh... forgot his name,” I replied to which the three others in the group laughed, Rarity speaking up first.

“Don't let him know. He's not one to be forgotten about,” she chimed. I didn't know what was so funny so I just rolled with it. Fancy Pants led us to the dining room where there was a waiter he spoke to.

“Table for four,” Fancy told the waiter who in turn led us over to a finely set table that was lit with candles. We all took our seat, Rarity and I sitting across from Fancy Pants and his wife. He gave the waiter some money and turned back to me. “So... may I ask, not in rudeness but in curiosity... what exactly are you?” he asked and I shrugged.

“A human... from another world. I was zapped here by accident and now... without a way home I just...” I looked around for a brief moment before turning back to him. “This is my home now, yah know?” I told him and he nodded.

After a few minutes of useless gibber-jabber about what I was and who I was, the waiter returned with four fine dining glasses filled with red whine... or maybe some other form of hard liquor. Fancy Pants held up his glass. “Ahh, a toast then, to our friendship,” he concluded and I twitched my lip.

“I uhh... no offense but I uhh... I don't drink,” I replied, scratching the back of my head. He rose an interested brow.

“Not even just a little?” he asked and I shook my head.

“Sorry I... don't like the taste. Makes me feel a little under the weather. Sorry,” I apologized and he smiled brightly.

“Indeed,” he said, turning to Rarity. “Such a fine young healthy man. Rarity you really do know how to pick them,” he appraised her. Turning to the waiter, he spoke up. “Waiter! A glass of water for the young man,” he called out and the waiter soon came around with a similar glass as my other one but this time filled with water.

He once again rose his glass. “A toast then,” he said and we all clanged our glasses together before having a drink. After a quiet moment of peace, Fancy Pants spoke up again. “Well... I must say, you are truly a magnificent pony, err person, Mr. Burdick,” he said and I just brushed off his appraisal with a wave of my hand.

“Nah, not really,” I said, taking notice that his wife had already downed her glass of wine. Fancy Pants chuckled to my remark.

“Well... truly you are modest but... surely you must know you have a wonderful physique. It must've taken you months... no, years to acquire such a strong and durable build. I mean, I can literally see every curve of your body through that finely woven suit of yours...” he trailed off and looked to Rarity.

“I'm sure you were the one to have crafted it for him? I only know one pony in Equestria who can make such fine suits, Rarity,” he appraised, somehow knowing she had made the suit. Rarity just blushed and as they continued their rather brief dialogue, I felt something rub up the inner thigh of my leg... like a paw or a hoof.

I jerked slightly and lifted up the table cloth. Rarity and Fancy Pants looked to me as I peeked at my legs, realizing nothing was there. As the others looked to me I noted that I'd need an excuse for looking. “Sorry, I just uhh...” I trailed off, leaning down while reaching into my pocket, into my wallet and fishing out a Celestia bit. I made like I picked something up off the ground then sat back up. “Dropped a coin,” I replied and Fancy Pants chuckled, seeing just what type of coin it was.

“Yes indeed, wouldn't want to lose one of those,” he chuckled, his wife raising an impressed brow... maybe due to how much money this coin was worth. I slipped the coin back into my pocket as Fancy Pants spoke again. “So... please, do tell. Mount Tia... how was it?” he asked. I heard his wife sigh, leaning her cheek into a supporting hoof with a roll of her eyes.

Rarity seemed just as interested as Fancy Pants so I began the fabricated tale I was supposed to tell. While I told the lie, I made note to make it sound a little interesting and used actual events in the story, though obviously not using Daring Do's name. Though while telling the story I was a little less than... enthusiastic about it.

I started to feel that... rubbing again. I shrugged it off, figuring it was nothing. While I told the story, I took notice that Fancy's wife was pounding back the wine... man, she could really drink. As the story neared the end, I noticed that his wife was giving me... looks. Not drunk looks but... some kind of look.

I thought nothing of it and began talking to Fancy again, giving him all my attention. As I did, I felt the rubbing go further up my thigh and to my groin, making my body go involuntarily stiff. I didn't want to look, because if it was nothing than I'd look like a fool saying that I had dropped a coin again.

“So... that was it,” I replied, cutting the story to a brief end. Fancy smiled then clapped.

“Wow, truly amazing. Wouldn't you say dear?” he asked, giving a nudge to his wife. She rose a brow and nodded with a... cheeky smile.

The rubbing against my groin area persisted. “Indeed... breathtaking,” she said in a strange voice. The rubbing gave a gentle massage against my now stiff erection. 'Okay, seriously, what the fuck is that?' my conscious spoke up. I still refrained from looking, I knew I'd look like a dork.

I shrugged. “Well... I mean... it's not really all that great,” I told the others. Rarity nudged me.

“Well of course it is darling. You made a departing mare's dying wish possible,” she replied. I just shrugged.

“Yeah but... she still had time left. After the exertion of Mount Tia... that was it. Sure it was her dying wish but it... I mean, it's kinda like I brought her to her death, even if it was inevitable... you know?” I replied, the others going silent. “It doesn't haunt me so much as it makes me think about things. Even an easily made good decision is hard to come to terms with afterwards,” I told them.

Rarity wrapped her forelegs around my arm and hugged me tightly. “Don't worry about it darling. What you did was good, through and through,” she chimed and Fancy nodded.

“Indeed. You truly are one of nobility, even if you won't accept that fact,” he praised. I just shrugged it off. In that moment I realized the rubbing around my crotch had left. A small smile came to my face. I knew it was nothing. However, just as I thought that, something managed to get inside my underwear without actually having to pass through my pants. The... whatever it was, grasped my erect shaft and began to stroke it. “Ugh! Pfft...” I grunted from the sudden sensation. Fancy and Rarity looked to me with estranged looks.

“Sorry... holding back a sneeze,” I lied. I noticed his wife had a sly grin on her face and also the fact her horn was slightly illuminated. 'Was this her doing? No, it couldn't be... probably just coincidence. Why would she do this?' I thought silently.

Fancy chuckled then turned to Rarity and began conversation, mostly useless stuff. I bit my lip and looked down to the table, resting my head in my supporting hand. The feeling started to build up pressure in my groin and I sipped back a deep inhale as an orgasm neared. Just before I could reach my simmering orgasm however, the feeling went away. I let out a gasp of shock, catching the others' immediate attention.

In quick thought I let out a forced yawn. “Sorry... I know it's a little rude. Long train ride,” I lied. 'UGH! Fuck! Goddess dammit! The hell is that thing?!' I scrunched my nose and Fancy chuckled.

“Well, I do say... you truly are something else,” he said with a smile. It was so hard to focus right now all I could do was nod. Several minutes past with Fancy Pants just talking about... upper class stuff.

His wife moved her seat back and stood up. “Sweetheart, could you come with me for a moment?” she asked him and he didn't even turn to her as he nodded.

“Yes, of course darling, in a moment. Just let me finish this one story. So anyway, there I am...” he continued his story to Rarity and I. Fleur sighed in an annoyed way and turned to me. “Will you escort me. I need somepony to accompany me and it will only take a moment,” she asked me.

“Uhh... I guess. Be right back,” I told the other two who just nodded and Fancy continued his story. Fleur led me away and I stumbled behind her, trying my best to make sure my raging erection wasn't noticable. “So, uhm... where are we going?” I asked.

“Don't worry about that. Just follow me, like an escort,” she told me and I just went with it. She led me out of the diner room and down some hallways. Eventually we reached some washrooms. Turning her head over her shoulder, she gave me a wink and fluffed her tail under my chin, walking towards the washroom doors.

“I'll only be a moment but... if I'm not out soon, cum inside and rescue me, stud,” she said in a weird voice. With that she proceeded into the washroom, walking with a strange sway in her hips.

I just rolled my eyes and leaned up against the wall beside the washroom doors. 'Pfft... why did she need an escort to the washrooms?' I asked myself and my conscious spoke up with a hearty laugh.

'She's a hoity-toity first class bimbo. She wants an escort everywhere,' he spoke and I just chuckled. I waited for a little while before one of my brow rose up. As I stood around, my urges faded away along with my thoughts. She certainly was taking her sweet ass time.

Just as I thought that, Fleur's voice sang out. “Oh, Mr. Burdy, won't you help me?” she called out. I rolled my eye. 'How does she have trouble using the washroom?' I asked and my conscious snickered.

'Ran out of toilet paper in her stall,' he laughed and we both chuckled.

'Ain't that always the way,' I replied as I stepped into the washroom. My eye went wide with shock. This bathroom wasn't just any ordinary bathroom, it was like the Cadillac of bathrooms. The floor was immaculately clean and the sink looked like it was chiseled out of marble stone.

The washroom stalls were separated by fine oak, or maybe maple, furnished wood that had been stained and glossed perfectly. “Wow...” I muttered but jumped in shock as the door shut behind me and locked.

“Celestia!... Guh! Fleur-” I was cut off as she pressed a hoof to my lips.

“Sssh... we're all alone now... so why don't you show me why your friends call you Burdy,” she asked in a blissful way, bashing her eyelashes at me.

I smiled as memories drifted into my mind. “Ahhh... yes, the good ol' days. Well, back in the day I played football and-” I was again cut off as Fleur put her lips to mine, shocking me greatly. 'SHE'S MARRIED!' I yelled out in my mind.

“Sssh, I think I can figure it out. Though they should call you Big Burdy,” she giggled and I rose a brow. 'What, like Big Bird? Do they even have Sesame Street here in Equestria?' I thought to myself before I realized something else.

Her magic aura was undoing my belt. “GAH! HEY!” I yelped, giving her a shock. “What are you doing?” I gasped and she shot me a strange look.

“Well... I know what you want, and I want it too so let's just say we'll satisfy each others' needs,” she told me and I didn't even bother putting the puzzle pieces together.

“What?! I didn't want any of this!” I told her, stumbling back and she was taken back in shock.

“Y-y-you mean... no?” she asked as I was trying to catch my breath. I shook my head and her expression went from one of lust to that of... sadness? “I'm sorry. I just thought... it's cause I'm fat isn't it?” she asked and I was thrown into further confusion.

“Wait... WHAT?!” I gasped and she turned her head away.

“I've been trying okay! It's not easy losing weight when you're this stressed out and such a fat little piggy like me! I just thought maybe... never mind!” she began to weep and I tried to reach out to her but she swatted my hand away. “Just leave, please!” she cried.

'Fuck... mares,' my conscious spoke. “Uhm... what the hay are you talking about?” I asked blankly. She shot me a glare and pulled on her side fur a little.

“Don't act like you don't know. It's why you think I'm unattractive,” she yelled and I rose a brow.

“What? No, I don't think you're unattractive. Quite the opposite actually,” I replied. She huffed.

“Really?” she asked and I nodded. “Than why won't you rut me? If I'm so beautiful why haven't you mounted me yet?” she asked and my jaw went slack. 'Is... is she...' I thought to myself and my conscious nodded.

'Dude, she's totally asking you to stick your dick in her,' He told me, in equal shock as me.

I shook my head, speaking my mind. “B-b-but you're married!” I exclaimed and she just whimpered.

“It's not what I thought it would be! In the beginning it was wonderful. He brought me places, bought me things but now... he just parades around with his friends, only keeping me there as eye candy, treating me like some grand accomplishment. He doesn't satisfy me in the way he used to. He doesn't do anything... naughty. It's as if he just... I don't know. I want something more. Something fulfilling!” she informed me. “Is that too much to ask?!” she wept and I rose a brow.

“But... having an affair?” I asked and she turned her head to one side.

“It's not like he'd know, let alone care. He'd probably just find another anyway. Just look, see?” she asked, pointing to the mirror. I looked and all I saw was our reflections, both sitting on the floor.

I shrugged and held my hands up in a 'Ah dunno' kind of way. “I don't get it?” I asked and she sighed.

“In my time of need, in my time of want... it's not him here comforting me, it's you. Somepony I barely even know.” I blinked.

“Well... I mean, it's not like you said you had something you needed to talk with him about. You said you wanted to go somewhere,” I said in Fancy's defense. She sighed.

“Yes, but shouldn't my asking of his presence in private be enough to persuade him away from any conversation. I am his wife, isn't that supposed to be important?” she asked. I just sighed.

“I don't know... I just... I don't know,” I replied and she scooched over closer to me.

“Well, just look at you. You'd probably be right to the aid of your lover,” she replied and I just chuckled and shook my head. She gave me a stunned look.

“I'm not... we're not actually together,” I replied and thought back on it. Rarity had been furious with that stallion whom later we made a mockery out of... I sighed. “She just got me to say that to boast to that stallion, 004.” I closed my eye and shook my head. “She's one of my mom's friends I met. Celestia gave me two private invitations and she tagged along cause nopony else would,” I informed her and Fleur's mouth opened slightly.

“Oh... I'm so sorry. I had no idea,” she whispered out an apology. I just sighed and picked at the woven fabric of the suit Rarity had made me.

“This isn't me. I don't... go to fancy parties, wear nice clothes... hell, I live in my mom's basement for Celestia's sake. The one thing I've done that caught everypony's attention... was all a lie,” I told her and she rose a brow.

“You didn't climb Mount Tia?” she gasped but I nodded.

“No, I did... it just wasn't as heroic as the media has made it sound. That's all I can tell you. The rest is classified,” I told her. She was shocked then postured herself and wiped a tear away.

“I'm sorry about this, all this. It isn't me... well, it is a little. Ever since I've become fed up with Fancy Pants I've been looking for somepony. Somepony he admires. I thought maybe... I don't know, maybe if I did this he'd respect me or something, or maybe that you and I would run off into the sunset together...” she began to cry a little and I cupped her chin, bringing her face up as I gave her a heartwarming smile.

“Okay... calm down. Relax,” I cooed her. “Have you spoken to Fancy Pants about this... need?” I asked and she nodded.

“Well... I did tell him I wanted something more, so he bought me a new dress,” she commented and I shook my head.

“No, I mean have you told him what you told me. That you want him to pay more attention to you. That you want him to show you he truly loves you?” I asked. She stayed silent for a long moment.

“Well... no,” she replied and I groaned, dipping my head into the palms of my hands. “What, is something wrong?” she asked cluelessly.

'Mares...' I thought to myself. I looked back up to her with a heartwarming smile, or the best I could muster. “Listen, Fleur... I'll tell you from my own knowledge... sometimes stallions are near brain dead and you need to tell him exactly what you want,” I told her and she rose a hoof to her mouth.

“Oh my goddess... are you... gay?” she asked and my jaw went slack.

“NO I AM NOT GAY! Why would you think that?!” I gasped and she bit her lower lip.

“Well... you said from your own knowledge... meaning...” she trailed off and I groaned.

“No, I meant I'm an idiot. So I know that sometimes it's hard for guys to understand what a mare is trying to tell them,” I replied and she laughed.

“You know, it's funny... you looked confused when I was jerking you off earlier. Like you had no idea what was happening,” she giggled and it was at that moment that I clued in... IT WAS HER!

I sighed, shaking my head. She gave me a nudge. “Oh, buck up. It's alright. I guess stallions just aren't as smart as mares,” she teased and I just rolled my eye. With that set aside, she was at least smiling now, and not trying to have me rut her. “So... what should I say to my husband?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Well... what is it you want? I mean, aside from attention. What do you want him to do for you?” I asked and she cocked her head to one side.

“I don't know... I'm just... I feel really insecure. I think I'm getting fat,” she replied and I just laughed.

“Yeah, okay. You fat? Not likely,” I said and she rose an interested brow. “Listen, I've seen a lot of ponies and you're probably the lightest I've ever seen. What do you weigh?A hundred and twenty pounds soaking wet?” I asked reasonably. She was about my height on her hindlegs and she was a pony so...

“Actually... I weigh a hundred pounds,” she said softly and I gave her a bit of a nudge.

“For somepony as tall as you, that's probably not healthy. And the twenty extra pounds is from the water, like I said: soaking wet.” I assured her and she smiled back at me.

“Thank you,” she thanked me and I shrugged. “I guess... I don't know... I just want him to hold me, to love me... I'm not sure,” she said and I gave her a hug.

“Just tell him... you want him to spend more time alone with you, away from the world. Go on a vacation somewhere relaxing... like that?” I asked and she nodded with a sigh.

“I guess...” she trailed off and rubbed her belly. “I want a foal,” she told me and my eye went wide. “What should I tell him?” she asked and I was speechless.

“Ah-ha... huh... uhm... well, ask him to give you a foal,” I replied stammeringly.

“But... I mean, how do I approach him about it? How do I ask properly so he doens't think I want to adopt one or something?” she asked and I just continued to chuckle nervously.

“Well I... uhm... uhhh... listen, I'm not exactly the greatest person to be giving advice on that one,” I replied and she rose an interested brow. “For the longest time I thought a stork brought a foal in a basket,” I told her and her jaw went slack.

“Seriously?” she asked in disbelief but I shook my head.

“No, not really but... what I mean is, I don't have much experience with asking stallions to get me pregnant,” I chuckled then put on a straight face. “Ah'm pregnant,” I said in my best Arnie voice. She got a laugh out of my joke, though she most likely didn't understand why I said it like that.

“Well... if a mare were to come to you, how would she have to ask to make you understand?” she asked and I thought for a long while.

“Uhm... well, there's probably a million ways but I suppose the most effective way would be to just tell him you want him to get you pregnant... that's the blunt way. I suppose you could ask in a more kinky way like saying you want him to make a foal inside of you but he might lose track of what you're saying if you try to get too kinky-” she cut me off with a kiss to the lips.

“Thank you Burdy... can I call you Burdy?” she asked and I nodded. “Thank you so much. I'll never forget this,” she said and with that she was off. I sat on the floor of the washroom, leaning my back up against the wall.

'That was... interesting,' I thought to myself. 'I definitely didn't sign up for this.' It took a moment for everything to register in my thoughts and finally, just as I was getting up, a mare walked through the bathroom doors. She stopped at the sight of my presence. Looking back to the exterior of the door, she quickly looked back to me.

“Uhm... this is the... female washroom,” she stated hesitantly. I gave her a depressed look.

“Ah'm an old lady,” I said in my best Arnold voice...

* * *

Third person...

Rarity sat at the table with Fancy Pants who continued to ramble on about his many accomplishments. The mare seemed just memorized by all his stories, even the less impressive ones.

He adjusted the monocle on his face and gave Rarity a look. “Well yes... though I do say, Rarity we've been sitting for ages and you have yet to tell me anyth-” he was cut off as his wife took residence beside him.

Turning to her, he smiled. “Ahh, darling... where's Burdy?” he asked in curiosity, noticing that the tall man was no longer accompanying her. She didn't answer his question and leaned into him, planting a kiss on her husband's lips.

Before he could speak, she leaned over and whispered into his ear with a rather casual tone. “I want a foal, Fancy Pants,” she told him and he was thrown off by the rather unusual statement.

“I... you what?” he asked back and she leaned into him, nibbling on his ear.

With a seductive hiss in her voice, she spoke again. “I want you to put a foal inside of me,” she told him and his body went rigid. His mouth gaped open slightly as she trailed one of her hoofs down his side and rested it firmly on his lap.

Standing up, he stammered out a departure to Rarity. “W-w-w-we-well, Rar-Rarity... I-I-I... I do say it has be-been a pleasure. I do hate having to cut our conversation short ever so much but... I have most important and pressing matters to attend to!” he bumbled out and with that his wife led him off.

Rarity sat for a moment then realized something that Fancy Pants had brought up. “Where the hay is Burdy?” she asked, standing up and going to search for him.

On the other side of the gala, Evan made his way through the dense crowds and to the tables lined out with food. “Man... for a dining room they didn't serve me any food,” the man muttered to himself as he followed his nostrils' enhanced senses to the most elegant smelling foods.

He moseyed around until he found the pastry table. Rubbing his hands together, he clucked his tongue and reached for a pie. Just as he was about to grab it, his hand bumped into a light blue hoof.

The two pulled their respective limbs away and looked to each other. “Ugh! Sorry I just...” Evan trailed off as he looked to the uniformed Wonderbolt. 'Huh... he looks familiar,' he thought to himself as he looked over the leotard wearing stallion.

“Sorry, I wasn't looking,” the stallion gave an apology and Evan just shrugged.

“Nah it's alright. I wasn't really looking. They didn't have much to eat in the dining room,” he told the stallion who chuckled.

“Yeah, you're telling me!” he laughed and they both chuckled. Burdy clucked his tongue then looked to the stallion, squinting his eye slightly as he tried to visualize who it was under the suit. He knew it was on the tip of his tongue.

With a shrug he moved on to something else. “You can have that pie,” he offered and the stallion's eyes went wide.

“Woah... you... you really mean it?!” he asked with excitement and the big man just shrugged.

“Yeah... sure why not? I think I can find something else to tide me over,” he said, grabbing an eclair an downing it, making note not to get any powdered sugar on his suit. The stallion's jaw slacked open in amazment.

“WOW! You're the greatest!” The stallion was tided over and thrilled, instantly plunging his face into the tender pie and devouring it. Lifting his head up for a moment, the stallion extended his hoof. “Soarin,” he said through a mouthful and Burdy reached out his hand and shook the stallion's hoof.

“Burdy... Soarin eh? Sounds... familiar,” the man replied, still trying to put a bead on the stallion's identity and how he knew him.

“Yeah, Wonderbolt first lieutenant,” he replied. Evan snapped with realization.

“Yup, knew it. Rainbow Dash talks about you guys all the time,” he replied. Even now that he knew know this stallion was a Wonderbolt, he still had a feeling of unknowing, like there was still a piece missing from the puzzle.

“NO WAY! You know Rainbow Dash?! Well any friend of hers is a friend of mine!” he exclaimed and the man shrugged.

“Well... she's my mom's friend really. I've only hung out with her... well I've never really hung out with her, just bumped into each other...” he replied, remembering the time in Ghastly Gorge with the Timber Wolves.

“Well, she really is something else, let me tell you. This one time, she totally swooped in and saved my pie!” he announced and Evan just chuckled.

“She does have a way of saving the day at the last moment,” he replied. The stallion stuffed back the remainder of the strudel he was eating then looked to the big man who was stuffing back cookies.

“You should come by and meet the team. I'm sure they'd love to meet you Burdy!” he exclaimed then rubbed his forehead in thought. “Burdy... that name sounds familiar and you do kinda remind me of somepony... err, someone, I've met before...” he trailed off in thought, trying to remember how the duo knew each other. With a shrug, the two of them grabbed some food to go and made off.

Elsewhere, Fleur de Lis pushed her husband through a washroom door, locking it behind them as she kissed him passionately. Both their manes were already ruffled at this point. Fancy moved his head back, adjusting his posture as he looked to his horny wife.

“I do say... darling are you sure about-” he was cut off as his wife pressed her lips to his again, driving her tongue into his mouth. She moved her hooves on him in all the right ways, moving them down his back and firmly grabbing his rump, pulling his hips into hers.

Pulling her mouth away from his, a strand of saliva strung between there mouths. “I've wanted this for a long time,” she whispered to him and he swallowed hard.

“Y-you have?” he stuttered and she nodded. “I'm... I'm so sorry I-” he was cut off as she pressed her lips to his again, though only briefly.

“I know, though it took me long enough to realize you weren't understanding what I wanted,” she began to lather kisses down his neck, making his body go stiff. Twirling their bodies around, she sat him on the washroom sink counter, trailing her kisses down his body.

He huffed, breathing deeply as his body got excited. His heart began to thump in his chest, beating wildly. Ever so gradually, his erection rose to full mast. Fleur looked to her husband, grabbing hold of his erection with one hoof while she gazed upon his with dreamy eyes.

“Is this for me?” she asked, giving a gentle stroke of his shaft. He was speechless, gasping and grunting as his hooves gripped the side of the sink counter.

“Fleurrrrr... ugh!” he gasped as he felt her smooth slick tongue run up along the underside of his equine cock. Losing composure, his body lurched forwards, his front hooves taking residence on her shoulders. Her tongue looped circles around the tip of his cock, teasing him in a mind blowing way.

His wife took her head away and gave a mischievous grin. “Tell me you want me, stud,” she told him and he swallowed hard, gasping and panting already.

“Darling... please! I want you!” He was breathing heavily, mouth agape and tongue slightly out of his mouth. She gave him a taste, or rather, she took a taste. Ever so slowly she plunged his length down her throat, bobbing her head and caressing his shaft with her tongue.

He grunted and moaned, not accustomed to this sort of foreplay as his cock traveled down her tight throat. “Oh... oooh Fleur... I had no idea you were so... ahh, talentahhh... talented,” he moaned to his wife. She looked up to him with a lustful set of eyes.

Popping his cock out of her mouth, she licked her lips. “You have no idea. I haven't even started,” she said with a smile, her horn lighting up.

Rarity trotted along through the crowds, muttering to herself. “For such a... big lug... it's amazing he's... so hard to find,” she said, constantly idling in her speech as she hopped up to try and see over the crowds of ponies.

As she moved along, she ended up crossing paths with Blueblood. “Ahh, Miss Rarity. So good to-” Rarity cut him short.

“Oh, remember my name now?” she asked in irritation and he just chuckled.

“Yes. Well, it took a moment but I rememb-” he was again cut off by the luxurious white mare.

“I don't have time for your foalish games. I have to find somepony,” she said and Blueblood perked a brow.

“Your friends ditch you? Oh, what a pity. Truly their loss. Tell you what...” he trailed off, swinging his head to one side. “I do have a place we could go to watch the beauty of the night together. And it'd be just you and I so you could admire my beauty in private... what do you say?” he asked, eyes still closed.

After a moment had passed and he didn't get a response, he opened his eyes, only to realize the mare in question was gone, leaving him looking like a fool. “UGH!” He gasped, trying to regain his composure.

Soarin led Evan through a private ribbon gate, secured privately for the Wonderbolts and their entourage. “Oh man, yeah so the mare was falling to her doom and we all thought it was over when 'WHOOSH!' Rainbow Dash swoops in and rescues the mare at the last second, saving the day!” Soarin informed his new found friend.

“Yeah, that certainly sounds like Dash,” the man replied as Soarin led him over to a group of similarly dressed ponies. The only difference being the others had their masks back, revealing their faces.

Soarin walked over to the yellow mare as he spoke. “Oh man, Spitfire, you totally have to meet this guy. HE'S SO AWESOME! He totally gave me the last pie even though he was there first!” he said, pointing over to the lone man so she could see who he was.

She rose a slightly unimpressed brow. “Always making friends with food I see,” she commented then sighed, extending her hoof. “Spitfire, captain of the Wonderbolts...” she trailed off. He shook her hoof lightly, at first figuring she'd shake with ladylike fashion but instead was greeted by a tight grip.

He squeezed back, not hard enough to break her hoof but hard enough to give a good hoofshake. “Burdick... but my friends call me Burdy,” the big man replied with a twitched smile. She smiled back.

“Huh, guess you're not quite as feeble as most of the folks around here... wait a minute...” she said, thinking to herself. “Burdy huh?” she asked and the man nodded. “As in... the guy who climbed to the summit of Mount Tia?” she asked and he just sighed.

“Yeah... I uhh... that was me. It was nothing really,” he replied in a depressed way, not really wanting to speak of it.

“Huh... well, I was gonna say it was really something else. But I guess you're the silent modest type huh? I like that. Come on over, I'll introduce you to the group.” She led him over to the others then groaned. “You know Soarin... we're not a group of superheroes or something. Everypony knows who you are and you don't need to keep that mask on everywhere you go,” she commented.

Soarin just chuckled to himself. “Yeah... I know. But I like to pretend sometimes,” he laughed, pulling back his mask and revealing his face. Burdy's eyes went wide with realization.

“That's where I know you from!” he exclaimed, gaining everypony's attention. They all looked to him and for a moment and Soarin didn't quite understand. “You're that stallion, the one from the train ride here,” he said and Soarin gulped, having somehow forgotten about his encounter with one of the only humans in Equestria.

“UGH! I uhh... don't know what you're talking about, sure it was me?” he asked nervously as Spitfire rose a brow.

“I thought you said you were late because of turbulence?” Spitfire asked. The stallion began to sweat a little.

“Yeah-yeah. Turbulence cause... well, instead of flying in the turbulence, I took the train,” he stated and the man muttered to himself.

“And got his own private washroom...” the man grumbled, not really realizing what the stallion had truly been doing. Soarin gulped as Spitfire gave him a stare.

“A private washroom? All to yourself?” she asked and he gulped.

“Well uhh... kinda yeah,” he stammered out and the big man added in.

“Bastard. Here I am about to pee myself, one's occupied and he's got the other all to himself,” the man stated and Spitfire gave the man a stare.

“A washroom all to himself? For what?” she asked and the man thought for a moment.

“Yeah, now that you mention it... it is kinda strange... but then again I bet that train food tasted really bad. It looked stale and old, that's why I didn't have any,” the man replied and Soarin butted in.

“Ohhh yeah. It was aweful. Horrible. Gave me terrible digestive problems,” he groaned, holding his stomach. Burdy turned to him.

“Sorry about locking you in,” he apologized and Soarin gasped.

“That was you?!” he stammered unbelievably and Burdy blushed.

Looking back to the yellow Wonderbolt captain, the big man chuckled nervously. “I was a little ticked off by the fact he got his own private washroom so I busted off the handle and jammed a fork into the door's internals... probably why he was late... sorry,” the man apologized and Spitfire's expression changed.

“Wait... you really... a private washroom?” she asked in disbelief and Soarin nodded.

“Uhh... heh-heh, yeah. Like he said, food was terrible. Gave me all sorts a cramps and... other things you don't wanna hear about,” he replied and Spitfire rose a brow.

“Wow... huh, not what I was thinking,” she said with a nod.

Soarin just shrugged.” It's alright. Not everything is as it seems,” he said, pulling the man to the side as if to mingle. “Whew! Dodged an arrow with that one...” he trailed off and the man looked at him with a dumbfounded expression.

“Huh?” he asked and Soarin looked to him.

“Man... please, never try to give me a heart attack again,” he laughed and the man was puzzled.

“Give you a heart attack?” he asked and Soarin nodded.

“Yeah... you know, telling her about the train?” he replied and Burdy just blinked. “Okay, just... whatever you do, don't tell her about the attendant mare, okay?” he asked and the man rubbed his chin.

“Oh yeah... the attendant mare... ran outta toilet paper eh?” he asked, completely clueless to what Soarin had actually been doing. In that moment, Soarin took note that the man was completely dense.

“Ah-ha... yeah. Real killer thing man. Hate it when I run out of toilet paper.” He let out a deep exhale of relief. After a brief moment of peace, Spitfire called Burdy and Soarin back over.

Walking over, Spitfire pointed the man out to the rest of the group. “Yeah, at first I thought it was just another stranger Soarin had picked up with his... unnatural eating habbits but, no. Turns out this guy's the real deal. He's the one who climbed Mount Tia with that sick mare,” she told the group who all looked to Burdy, who in turn just blushed timidly.

Elsewhere, Rarity continued through the crowds, searching for her big friend. “Oh... of course he makes off and forgets about me. How could he-” she trailed off as she bumped into the chest of a stallion. She was about to apologize then realized who it was.

“Oh, ever so sorry madam,” Blueblood apologized in a very noble voice. Rarity just scowled at him.

“I don't have time for your coltish attitude Blueblood. I have things to do!” she told him as she tried to move around him but he side stepped into her path.

“Please. I realize now that my actions before were... distasteful,” he replied and Rarity growled.

“Distasteful. Distasteful? DISTASTEFUL?! They were downright rude and unchivalrous, impolite and in no manner the way a stallion is to treat a lady. Now if you don't mind, I have somewhere to be!” she yelled at him, gaining others' attention. Blueblood just sheeped away for the time being.

In the secluded and locked washrooms Fleur continued to suck off her husband, a deep and growing lust building in the base of his testicles. “Oh goddess... oh goddess, Fleur... oh goddess yes!” he moaned but without warning she simply stopped, a bit of precum lining her lips along with a strand of saliva that strung between her mouth and the head of his cock.

He gasped loudly, on the verge of an orgasm. “Darling! Why'd you stop?!” he gasped. She looked to him playfully, getting up to all fours and crawling up on the sink counter.

Laying flat on her belly, she spread her hindlegs apart to give her husband a full view of her glistening and twitching cunt. “Hmm... well I can't let you have all the fun now can I?” she asked playfully.

The stallion didn't need to be told twice what she wanted, he knew full well. He crawled over to her and further spread apart her flank cheeks with his hooves. Without further ado, he dove his face into her plot and began licking up her sweet mare juices.

Fleur giggled, looking over her shoulders to her husband who was, for the first time in a while, solely occupied her and her alone. “Darling...” she chimed and he looked up to her. “You mustache tickles... it feels good,” she giggled and he smiled back to her.

“Am I doing a good job? I'm not quite-” he was cut off as she rubbed her plot into his face. “I'll let you figure that out on your own,” she replied, moaning deeply as she felt his tongue intrude her most private depths.

Burdy reached into his suit pocket but found he was out of food. “Snap...” he muttered, catching Soarin and Spitfire's attention. “Sorry but uhh... I'm kinda hungry and... I'm gonna go find something to eat,” Burdy told the group, to which Spitfire chuckled.

“Gee Soarin, this guy's got more of an appetite than you... hate to see what's he's like after a workout,” she commented as the big guy left. Soarin nodded with a chuckle, taking note of the man's larger physique.

“Yeah, no doubt.” He felt his own stomach, stuff and filled to his content and wondered how the big man managed to keep so fit. Spitfire broke his train of thought.

“I wonder if he'd be interested in training Wonderbolt cadets... I'd love to see what he could do in a track suit,” she commented and Soarin rose a brow, Spitfire noticing his stare. “Just saying.”

The big man left the lounging area and tried to find his way back to the food buffets but in the end found himself lost in the massive gala. 'Ohh... of course I have to lose myself,' he thought quietly...

* * *

Burdy's perspective...

I moseyed on through the hallways trying to find my way back to those food tables. Following my nose, I led myself down hallway after hallway. As I moved through the hallways I found it better to close my eye and follow the scents. Without the use of vision, my other senses kicked into high gear. As I moved down another hallway, I closed my eye and sniffed, whilst still on the move.

Without the use of my vision, I accidentally bumped into yet another pony. 'Ugh! Today is really just not my day,' I thought silently as I opened my eye to apologize. “Sorry I... Derreck?!” I gasped, realizing it was my big friend.

He turned to me, his large facial scars ever present. “Eh, Evan. How's it going?” he asked in a hearty tone. I was baffled by his presence here.

“Der-Derreck... you're... you're here?” I asked and he nodded.

“Was in the neighborhood and heard you were around. Figured I'd drop by,” he said, looking back to the portrait on the wall. “Interesting huh?” he asked, pointing to the illustrated picture. I looked up to the picture and saw what looked like some interpretation of some medieval battle.

“Who would've thought the ponies had a violent background?” he asked and I just shrugged my shoulders with a look of cluelessness. “War museum,” he said, pointing to a set of locked doors. “Have to wait till morning to see it but the hallways have a few things on display,” he said, leading me down the hallway.

There were swords on display and suits of armor, battle axes, maces... a bunch of cool things. “All these things and never one created a firearm... cannons though,” he said, pointing to a picture of two ponies operating a cannon in what reminded me of an American Civil War photo.

“Yeah... Equestria's better off without guns. I've been to the darker alleys of Manehatten at night,” I replied and he just chuckled.

“I was there ding-dong, remember? I'm just fascinated by the fact they just... stopped at cannons... heck, research says recently their military is just the royal guard, nothing more...” he trailed off and I rolled my eye.

“Why would a peaceful world need armies?” I asked and he chuckled.

“Ask any World War Two veteran,” he chuckled. I just sighed.

“This place is nothing like Earth. They wouldn't need armies.” I looked to the war time photos. “Not anymore.”

“GODDESS DAMMIT, YOU LITTLE MAGGOTY SHIT EATER!” Screamed a voice that made me jump. I turned my head to see a stallion storming towards me.

He was wearing royal guard armor, but was lacking the helmet. Instead there was a dark green lemon squeezer hat on his head. His fur was a light brown and his mane used to be dark brown but was now heavily grayed. He had many aging wrinkles on his face but his body language said he had the fitness of a stallion in his twenties.

I was a little stunned to hear a pony swear in such a manner but all the same his angered gaze from those icy blue eyes sent shivers down my spine. “Uhh... me?” I asked, pointing to myself. He got right up in my face.

“No, Hearth you dumb sack a shit. YES YOU!” He roared, blowing back my short hair. I went wide eyed as he continued roaring at me. “I don't fuckin know how you did some transformation spell to make yourself look like this, BUT I DON'T RIGHTLY FUCKING CARE!” He roared and I chuckled.

“Uhh... I think you might have it wrong,” I said, figuring he thought I was somepony else.

“DID I SAY YOU COULD FUCKIN TALK MAGGOT! NOW GET YOUR ASS BACK TO THE BARRACKS BEFORE I P.T. YOU TO FUCKING DEATH!” He roared in my face, spit landing on my cheeks. “MOVE IT PRIVATE!” He roared.

“Uhh... listen I uhh... I'm not... I'm from Ponyville,” I replied unsurely.

“I DON'T GIVE TWO SHITS WHERE YOU'RE FROM YOU INSUBORDINATE CUNT! GET THE FUCK BACK TO BARRACKS NOW, BEFORE I BREAK A BROOM HANDLE OFF IN YOUR ASS!” He boomed. His threats caught Derreck's interests.

I was left speechless. This guy would be terrifying if I was a recruit... but, thank goddess I wasn't. “Listen, uhm...” I trailed off, figuring this guy was either a drill sergeant or a lieutenant. Figuring it was the former, I addressed him as so. “Drill sergeant I uhh... I'm not a recruit,” I replied honestly but he continued to scream at me, grabbing my ear and yanking me down, really catching Derreck's attention.

“PRIVATE STRAWBERRY, DON'T TRY TO FUCK WITH ME OR I WILL FUCK YOU SO HARD YOU WON'T WALK STRAIGHT FOR MONTHS! DO YOU THINK I'M FUCKING RETARDED? ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID OR SOMETHING?! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?! DID YOUR MOTHER NOT LOVE YOU ENOUGH AS A CHILD?!” He roared and the last question made me go pale.

Shivers went down my back as my heart sank. At this moment, Derreck intervened, grabbing the drill instructor by the throat with just one of his burly hands, heaving him up high. The stallion gagged and kicked.

“LET ME DOWN YOU LITTLE COCKROACH! I'M GONNA-” Derreck cut him short by squeezing around his neck, bringing his face right up against the sergeant's and snarling deeply like a ferocious animal.

“I didn't say you could talk,” he growled, squeezing tighter than before around the sergeant's neck, making him gasp for air. “You are not my drill instructor... and I am not your recruit,” he said, dropping the stallion to the floor.

As he fell to a heap, he staggered back to all fours, trying to regain his posture. Derreck slammed the side of his fist into a nearby set of armor, knocking it over. “Now beat it!” he growled in a low tone. However, before either of them spoke again, a high pitched whine cried out.

“AHHH! This armor, get it off! GET IT OFF! It's pinching me!” screamed a voice from inside the suit of display armor. Derreck ripped apart the set of armor, revealing a thin, red furred stallion hiding inside.

The sergeant yelled. “Private Strawberry!” he boomed as Derreck helped the thin stallion up and broomed him off with his hands, patting off the dust. Just before the sergeant could scream, Derreck snarled in retort.

“Alright... private, get to your barracks, the sergeant would like a word with you... now both of you... get out of my face,” he growled and the two of them gulped, giving him a petrified look before zooming off.

I stood there, still pale faced and gloomy. Derreck patted me on the back. “Buck up, he didn't mean that. He's just a crabby old fuck who's supposed to say that. It's in his job description. Come on, let's go get some watermelon and cantaloupe.” He gave me a nudge, smiling brightly.

“Besides, can't have an empty stomach if you're going to talk with the princess,” he told me and I rose a brow. “Well, she did give you a private invitation. She obviously wants to talk about something...”

* * *

Third person...

His tongue invaded her pussy, her juices coating his tastebuds and making him want more. He lapped up all her juices, driving his face into her plush flanks as he drove his tongue further inside of his wife.

Fleur moaned, nearing her climatic orgasm that she had been waiting so long for. Just as she was nearing the edge of her long awaited release, her husband stopped, pulling his mouth back and licking his lips.

“GAH... darling, what... why?” she pouted and he nibbled on his lower lip, holding his rock hard erection and rocking it back and forth.

“Well... I mean... I just figured...” he trailed off, a little nervously. Fleur smiled seductively, rolling onto her back and presenting herself to her horny husband. She gave a 'come hither' motion with her hoof which the stallion obliged.

He crawled atop his wife, putting his forehooves on each side of her and guiding himself towards her waiting entrance with just his hips. With a gulp he spoke. “I will say... it has been some time since I-” she cut him off with a kiss to the lips.

“Sssh, it's okay,” she replied.

“Well... I mean, I can't recall the last time I went bare so I may not last as long as you'd expect,” he apologized in advance. She rolled her eyes with a sigh. “And-and... I may not be as big as you'd like,” he continued to apologize but Fleur cut in.

“What do you mean?” she asked and he bit his lip.

“Well... I'm sure those other stallions-” she cut him short.

“What other stallions?” she asked and it was his turn to sigh.

“Well... you know... all those stallions you hang around with. And that chap we just met, Burdy,” he replied and she whimpered to him.

“Fancy, darling. I've never cheated on you... I will admit the thought has crossed my mind but...” she trailed off, giving him a kiss. “I was just trying to make you jealous,” she replied and his heart fluttered.

“Y-you mean... never?” he asked in amazement and she nodded.

“Only you love,” she replied.

“Really?” he bumbled. She sighed. He was killing the mood and she felt her urges fading fast. Without warning, she shoved her hips into his, impaling herself with his meaty cock and taking him to the hilt.

They both gasped in sensual lust as the feeling of being made whole overtook them, nearly driving both of them to an orgasm.

Fancy felt himself residing raw inside his wife for the first time in ages. Her tight insides massaged his cock and seemed to suck him inwards. He huffed and moaned in pleasure as Fleur wrapped her hindlegs tightly around his back.

He began to pull back slightly but the feeling was too overwhelming and he just ended up driving himself back into her. “Ffffhuh!” he gasped loudly and his wife whined out a long moan.

“Mmm... yes, that's it love, ram me as deep as you can!” she cried out.

Rarity looked through the crowds outside but to no avail. “If I didn't know him better I'd say he was avoiding me,” she grumbled as she walked across a lone bridge.

A voice called out. “Than let him. His loss,” Blueblood spoke. Rarity groaned.

“Go away colt, I'm not in the mood for your arrogant and vain attitude,” she stated and the stallion swept himself in front of her.

“Please, Rarity. I know it's late for apologies and I know it's too late to take back my rude behavior but please. I'm sorry I was so ungrateful to be in the presence of a mare like yourself. If you would please just forgive me,” he asked and she just groaned.

“Yes, fine I forgive you,” she said in a rather annoyed way as she moved past him. He was left expressionless as she moved past him and he immediately ran in front of her again.

“Please. Rarity, let me make it up to you,” he said, pulling a rose free and trying to hand it over to her. “My lady,” he said and she abruptly swatted the rose from his hoof.

“I'm not your lady and I'm not going to play your stupid games!” she scoffed and he gave a heart struck look. As she began to leave he called out to her in a faint voice.

“Please I... I just wanted to say I'm sorry...” he nearly whispered the last part, catching Rarity's attention. She turned back to him. “I know... I'm insubordinate and... I'm a real jerk and that's putting it lightly but... I at least want to try. You didn't deserve to be treated that way,” he said.

Rarity sighed, closing her eyes and remembering the fantasies she had about Blueblood before she had met him. He was so dreamy and perfect...

Trotting up to him, she placed a hoof under his chin and lifted his head. “There's a dance in five minutes. I'll be in the ball room,” she offered.

* * *

Burdy's perspective...

I walked along, my attention solely on Derreck as we shoveled back some melons we had picked up from the buffets. “Mmm... really good stuff. Ah ain't had melon this good since-” I bumped into another pony. 'Dammit! I gotta watch where I'm going!' I thought as I began an apology. Instead, a large regal body turned to greet me.

“Ah yes, Burdy. How are you?” Princess Celestia asked, turning to her guards and motioning for them to leave.

“Ugh! Princess Celestia. My apologies, I didn't mean to-” she cut me short.

“Oh please. Don't be so formal. Just call me Tia,” she offered and something clicked... Mount Tia... it must've been named after her.

“Uhh... sure. Uhm... Tia,” I nodded and Derreck seconded that, reaching out with his burly hand.

“Ma'am,” he offered and she rose a brow.

“Ah yes. You must be the one I've heard so much about. Mr. Parker I presume?” she asked and he nodded. “Your reputation proceeds you.” He gave a nod.

“As does yours ma'am. It's a pleasure,” he offered his courtesy which seemed well received. She looked over her shoulder and stepped aside as yet another pony joined our group. She stood taller than most ponies but not nearly as tall as Celestia. In moments I remembered her.

She was one of the alicorns from when I first arrived, Celestia's sister I think... and also the mare on the Luna bit. “LUNA!” I gasped, having remembered her name but not kept my realization in my thoughts. I scratched the back of my head nervously. “Sorry I... uhh... sudden realization. Ah remember you, nice tah see yah again ma'am,” I said but before I could extend my hand, Derreck extended his.

“Ma'am, it's an honor to be in your humble presence,” Derreck said in a tone that wasn't like him. Luna paused for a moment in hesitation but Celestia nodded, motioning her to shake his hand.

She extended her hoof to Derreck who in turn knelt down, took her hoof which was covered in a royal shoe and kissed it. My jaw went slack... he never acted like that! SO WHY NOW?!

Luna blushed heavily, withdrawing her hoof and stumbling back. Celestia chuckled. “Well, indeed. It's so good to see you accepted my invitation. I was beginning to think you wouldn't come,” she told me and I shook my head.

“Wouldn't think of it ma'am... err, Tia,” I said with a nod. Derreck looked to the elder sister.

“So, anything in particular you'd like to speak with us about?” he asked and she twitched her lip to one side in thought.

“Now that you mention it... not really. Though my sister may,” she offered, putting Luna on the spot.

“Well... we uhh... we do not think so,” she replied, a little nervously at that.

“We?” Derreck asked and she bit her lower lip hard.

“We apologize. It's a speech impediment we have,” she stated, staggering back a bit and slipping around the corner. Celestia just sighed.

“I'm sorry. She's a little... sensitive and... she's not the most sociable pony,” Celestia said and Derreck shrugged. I took notice that Luna was peaking around the corner.

“It's alright. We all have our differences. It's what makes us normal,” he said. I saw Luna duck back around the corner sheepishly. Celestia smiled.

“Indeed... well, I must be off. Enjoy yourselves and the sights of the gala,” she gave a nod and with that was off, leaving Luna huddling around the corner. Derreck rubbed his chin in thought.

“Whatta yah say Luna? Wanna tag along?” he asked and I gasped.

“Derreck! She's a princess!” I gasped and he smacked me upside the head. “OW!” I grunted, holding my sore head.

“Manners! Yeah she's a princess but she's also a pony. How do you know whether or not she'd like to go out and see the sights? Maybe she wants to hang out with somebody who isn't constantly grovelling at her hooves treating her like some higher being. Maybe she just wants to feel normal for a change,” he told me then looked back to the corner. “Whatta yah say Luna? We don't mind, right Evan?” he asked, though I knew it was rhetorical and I didn't have a say in this.

Luna sheepishly peeped her head around the corner. For a regal, high ruling, ever powerful princess, I had no idea she could be so shy... like she was she could almost give Fluttershy a run for her money.

“We... we would enjoy that greatly, if our presence is not too much of a burden on you,” she replied and Derreck just laughed.

“Nah, of course not. Hey, if I can deal with this guy all day, I think I can be in the presence of a pretty mare like yourself for a night,” he said in a charming tone and my jaw nearly hit the floor as I went wide eyed.

* * *

Third person...

Fleur moaned deeply into her husband's mouth, tongue's wrestling as his hips pistoned into hers. Sweat dampened both their fur coats, while a pool of juices resided beneath Fleur's flank.

Fancy stopped for a moment, gasping from exhaustion. His wife however would have none of it. Moving her leg low, she wrapped it around one of his hindlegs and flipped their bodies so she was on top.

Fancy grunted as his member slipped free for just a moment from his wife's slick velvety snatch. “Darling... what are you...” he trailed off as he watched her lower herself down onto him.

All of his attention focused to the magic making, he watched his entire cock slide into the folds of his wife. Completely hilted, he let out a low toned moan. His wife leaned down slightly as she placed her hooves on his shoulders and began to ride him.

A whispered moan left her mouth as she felt his medial ring sliding in and out of her juicy slit. Moving one of her front hooves down, she began to play with her swollen nub. With the intensified pleasure she found it difficult not to fall into a moaning wreck, let alone keep herself relatively quiet.

Watching his rod slide in and out of his wife, pounding her raw, was everything Fancy has fantasized about and then some. It reminded him of all those late nights at the office with those filthy magazines he had resorted too. Wishing in those moments he could do those things to his wife. Pound her raw, fill her with his cream, give her anal... the last one he'd have to ask about later.

His front hooves moved to her hips, gripping her perfect curves. With a gentle smack to her cutie mark, he rippled her flank cheek and got a squeal from his wife. “Oooh... Fancy you're sooo naughty,” his wife whined in the best seductive tone she could muster, which was drowned out a little by the sensual moans she was singing.

“A-am I?” he stammered and she nodded, lolling her tongue out and gently biting on the tip.

“Mhmm... and it makes me what to buck you harder,” she told him, resulting in another swat to the arse.

Twirling the knife like a showoff, Derreck swiftly sliced the large chocolate cake into sizable portions then scooped one up for the night princess. “Luna?” he offered and she smiled brightly.

Her horn lighting up, she took the slice of cake in her magical aura. Leaning her face forwards with grace she took a nibble, making certain not to spill much or get any of the chocolate icing on the sides of her cheeks.

Holding his slice of the cake with one hand, Derreck simply stuffed it back in one gulp. Luna went wide eyed as Derreck licked the icing off the sides of his mouth and looked to her. “You know... hate to say it... but if you keep eating like that... I'm gonna have the whole cake finished before you even finish that one piece,” he teased through chews, tilting his head to one side and trying to make certain she knew he was giving a wink opposed to just blinking.

With a blink, she immediately downed the rest of her cake, icing smearing across her lips. The princess and the big man quickly devoured the entire cake, laughing all the while as crumbs and icing spilled across the table and floor.

In minutes the cake was gone, the only evidence remaining being that of the icing smeared on their lips and cheeks. Derreck and Luna licked up around their lips, laughing and chuckling and gaining the attention of nearby ponies who looked with sheer and utter confusion, baffled that one of their regal rulers would act in such a way.

Derreck's tongue reached out to the side of his lips as far as it could reach, trying to get the bits of icing and crumbs that were out of his reach. Luna giggled playfully. “Here let us,” she laughed, licking off the icing and crumbs around his cheeks.

Within moments of doing so, her expression went pale, realizing she was no longer a filly playing with her sister when they were young. “We... we're so sorry,” she bumbled out. Derreck just laughed.

“Well, in that case...” he leaned over and licked the cake remains off her cheeks and some rather close to her lips. “If you get my leftovers than I get yours,” he laughed playfully. She smiled and they both laughed heartily together, others in the crowds looking to them with strange expressions.

Realizing they were the center of undivided attention, the duo grabbed some pastries and made off like bandits, howling in foalish laughter. Burdy, having been put on the back burner, just groaned to himself. 'Now... now he decides to be a playful oaf. Why now of all times?!'

Rarity stood alone with herself, biting her bottom lip as she stood on the ball room floor. “Of course I believed him. And once again he made a bloody fool of-” she was cut off by a most charming voice.

“My lady,” Blueblood spoke nobly as he knelt down. Rarity spun, only to find a bouquet of roses being presented to her by, to the unknown eye, a devilishly charming stallion. Rarity's eyes went wide.

“I... I don't know what to say...” she stuttered, baffled in sheer shock by the stallion's sudden disposition. She took one of the roses, snipping the stem short and placing it in her mane. 'Oh... it does look ever so dreadful like that,' she thought silently as she clipped another to fit in Blueblood's suit chest pocket.

Blueblood stood and took a slight bow. “My lady... would you give me this dance?” he asked politely, further taking Rarity off guard. She held a hoof to her chest in shock.

“Well... I do suppose we could give this another go,” she stammered, offering her hoof to him which he graciously took. Blueblood stood them both to their hindlegs then clapped, pointing to the orchestra.

The composer motioned to several of the ponies in the band and they began a most soothing note. Rarity's ears perked. “I... I love this note,” she commented and Blueblood smiled.

“I was hoping you would. It's also a favorite of mine. I could think of no better symphony while in the presence of an elegant beauty such as yourself,” he said smoothly, making Rarity blush. It was everything she had dreamed of... and then some. It almost made her forget about how brash he had been before.

As the night progressed, the tunes of the orchestra played throughout the gala. Blueblood and Rarity took dance after dance, eventually becoming the eye of the ball, just as she had always hoped to be.

Fleur and her husband Fancy were still busy creating a large mess. With the doors still locked, several mares complained about the locked washroom but instead were directed to another restroom. Having made an absolute mess on the sink counter, Fancy stood up, holding his wife as he pressed her into a wall and began to further give her the rutting of her life. Her juices oozed out and down her thighs, dampening her fur.

Elsewhere, Derreck, Luna and Burdy got into mild shenanigans, mostly pulling innocent pranks on unsuspecting party guests or eating loads of treats.

As they walked down lone hallways, Luna stopped them. “Look... Solar Guards...” she pointed to a pair of pegasus stallions at the end of the hallway, dressed in purely golden armor. “They're Celestia's best guards, hand picked by my sister herself...” she commented.

Derreck and Burdy looked down the hallway. It ended and a pony could go one of three ways. Going straight would bring a pony out to a balcony overlooking Canterlot. Going left or right would bring them further down the respective hallways. “I have a plan...” Luna whispered to Derreck and Burdy nibbled his lower lip.

“Guys... are you sure... I mean... they're on duty,” he mentioned but the others paid him no mind, putting him on the back burner...

The two stallions stood motionless, like obelisks. Blank expressions painted across their faces like it was an artist's work. Suddenly, a coin pinged across the floor in front of them. At first the two guards stood motionless, ignoring the coin.

However, the golden glint caught one of the stallions' eyes. Without moving his head, he looked down to see it was a Celestia bit, worth a thousand regular bits. Forcing a cough, he called out. “Excuse me... somepony there? You just dropped a Celestia bit...” he trailed off and looked down the hallways, seeing nopony.

Looking towards the bit that was rolling away, he swallowed deeply. His foot tapped nervously and he finally broke down, telling himself maybe a pony would come looking for it and he could return it to it's rightful owner... and if not, he'd be a thousand bits richer.

He scampered off after the coin which seemed to roll faster as he got closer, leading him into the darkness of the hallway. His partner groaned to himself, despising the others' lack of duty. Before he could complain to himself about the imbecile, something tapped on his right shoulder.

He turned but was greeted by the sight of nothing. He was about to call out when the same thing tapped on his left shoulder. Turning he was again greeted by the sight of nothing. “UGH! Huh?” Something again tapped on his right shoulder. Turning, he found nothing. He began pivoting on his heels, trying to find out who was playing this stupid game with him.

Twirling around in circles, he finally stopped and looked down the hallways adjacent of the balcony. “Alright! Who's here?! Show yourself!” he boomed. Without further ado, a dark mare dropped from the ceiling, landing before him and rising up to her full height. Her dark eyes flashed as she hissed at him with razor sharp fangs.

Letting out a horrified yelp, his wings pounded hard, feathers puffing out of his wings as he propelled himself out the balcony door and flew away in a flash.

Moments past and the other stallion came trotting back, prancing a little as he held the Celestia coin. “Hey Crank, look what I found,” he said, not really looking down the hallway as he basked in the beauty of the expensive coin.

Trotting up to his post, he looked up, only to find his partner no longer present. “Crank?” he asked, looking around. “Hey Crank... where'd you go?” he called out again. “Crank?!” he called out, rubbing his chin. “CRANK?!” He yelled out, his voice echoing in the silent hallways that now started to look like corridors.

With a shrug, he figured his partner probably went to use the restroom. He stood guard but within seconds heard a faint whistle of wind. He looked down the hallways and noticed that all the lamps were going out, the flames being extinguished one by one in perfect unison down all the hallways.

The darkness started to come closer and closer towards him. “Crank?! Is that you?! Please, stop it, I'M SORRY!” The lone guard screamed in horror, the darkness now rushing towards him. “CRANK!” He screamed flinching and huddling into a fetal position as the darkness swooped over him.

After a few moments of shuddering, the stallion realized nothing had happened to him. He stood up and let out a relieved sigh. “Huh... guess it was nothing,” he muttered, brushing himself off.

Just as he got settled, a dark figure landed on the balcony in front of him. As the tall figure's wings sprang out, a flash of lightning erupted behind the lone figure, illuminating her features. The stallion screamed in absolute horror as his legs kicked and scrambled.

His helmet and boots flung off as he made down the hallway across from the balcony. Dropping everything that could possibly weigh him down, he bolted. Another flash of lightning boomed, illuminating the hallway and passing her shadow across everything. The stallion screamed out. “NIGHTMARE MOON!”

Moments passed by and the lamps flickered back on, the flames returning. Luna spit the fake fangs from her mouth, chuckling lightly. Derreck emerged from the shadows as well, laughing heartily.

Luna spoke first. “It may not be Nightmare Night, but we enjoyed that ever so much,” she said in a casual tone. Derreck walked up, clapping and appraising the mare.

“Oh man, that was awesome,” he said, giving her props. She sighed and leaned back against the balcony rails, content with the pranks they had played tonight.

“Mr. Parker-” she began but he cut her short.

“Derreck... you can call me Derreck if you like, Luna,” he said and she smiled.

“Derreck... our sister has spoken of your powers in great respect... if you wouldn't mind... could we see these powers? Our sister always leaves us behind when she goes to deal with these things,” she commented and Derreck just chuckled.

“Well.. actually, she saw Burdy about his... particular energy blast that one time,” Derreck commented and she rose a brow.

“So... does thou mean mean to say they do not have powers?” she asked and he rose a brow, feeling playfully challenged.

“Alright... you wanna see my strength...”

Fleur felt herself coming close to yet another orgasm. Her insides began to ripple as she clenched down on her husbands shaft. He grunted, his motions losing rhythm. “Darling... I'm... I'm about to...” Fancy grunted. His wife clamped her hindlegs around tightly around him.

“Do it darling, and don't you dare think about pulling out. I want you to fill me up,” she whined. Fancy grunted, feeling himself begin to boil over.

Blueblood held Rarity in a slow dance, the two of them being the only ones now on the dance floor while the others now all on the sidelines as they watched the prince dance with the gorgeous mare.

Holding a rose in his mouth, he twirled her low, supporting her weight in his forelegs as he removed the rose from his mouth. Rarity let out a hushed sigh. As she gazed upon him with dreamy eyes.

Derreck stood outside with Luna and Evan as his witnesses. He spread his stance slightly and swung his arms to each side. His palms shot open as he grunted. A dark blue ball of fiery energy flourished in each palm.

“Alright... NGHAAAAH!” He roared out as he shot his right arm out and straight up. The ball of energy shot into the sky, a lone beacon of light bright enough for all to see. With his left, he fired a follow up shot.

When the two spheres of energy touched, they erupted into a glow of sparkles, lighting the dim night sky. Everypony at the gala, and in Canterlot, turned to see the audible eruption.

Fancy Pants doubled his speed, driving himself deeper into his wife. She let out a moan of ecstasy as she felt her orgasm wash over her, just as powerful, if not more, than the ones she had been experiencing all night.

Her inner muscles clamped down on Fancy's member that was driven deep inside of her welcoming hole. The increased tightness drove Fancy over the edge and he felt himself begin to twitch inside of his wife.

The eruption of what everypony thought was fireworks took their attention away from the dancing duo. Both Blueblood and Rarity closed their eyes as they leaned in for a kiss. As they neared each others' lips, they could literally feel their breath against one another. Blueblood pressed his lips into hers. Their soft silky lips touched for the first time, eruptions going off and not just the fireworks, but those of passion.

Fancy went rigid as he felt himself erupt inside his wife, jetting his hot sticky white cream into his wife's furthest depths. The feeling of his load being dumped in her drove Fleur to a new plateau of pleasure, her screams no longer retained and now echoed off the walls for all to hear.

Fancy jerked and drove himself into her a few times while he came, mixing their cum together in a lustful cocktail.

Derreck roared as he fired several shots into the air, all of them erupting beautifully over the course of the next few minutes. Luna sat back and relaxed, watching the magnificent show she had conned him into performing.

Elsewhere, on the highest balcony, stood Celestia, Equestria's regal ruler. She sighed to herself contently as she leaned her cheek into a hoof. She knew what was happening, she could sense Derreck's massive energy output... 'But, for one night... I'll let it pass... it is quite beautiful,' she thought to herself as she watched the fireworks go off.

Rarity and Blueblood parted their kiss for a moment. Rarity thought to herself... this was more than she had ever expected. It was better than perfect... it was truly fabulous. Her hooves wrapped around the back of his neck and pulled him into another kiss, the fireworks still going off.

Fancy felt himself still jetting into his wife and he drove his cock as deep as he could, pressing the tip of his flared cock against her cervix and blowing loads of cum into her womb. His own cum and that of his wife's seeped past his cock and dripped out of her now gaping cunt.

Fleur sighed as she felt her husbands hot sticky seed inside of her, and dripping down past her tail hole.

Derreck spread his stance wider, roaring out as his body tensed. “TIME TO FINISH THIS!” He boomed, his body mass increasing dramatically. Pulling his arms to the sides, he flexed and let out a roar.

A powerful blue aura blazed around him, though not accompanied by the electricity that usually followed. Veins bulged from his muscles, a true testament to his power. Swinging his right fist down low, he cocked his arm at the elbow.

His index and middle fingers straightened out from the fist he had made. Darker blue electricity crackled around his fingers. The sound of a handgun slide being racked quietly rang out through the air.

Furrowing his brow, Derreck swung both his arms forwards, left hand supporting his right in a shooter's stance. The electricity around his fingers snapped and crackled while Derreck's feet dug into the ground.

Like an ear piercing gunshot, a beam of energy left his fingers with a mighty BOOM! The dark blue beam snaked through the sky like a slithery dragon. Finally, and without much warning, the beam curled together and erupted in a spectacular finale.

Fancy pants lay with his wife, cum still oozing out of her hole. She rubbed her hoof across her exhausted husband's chest. Nestling her muzzle into his neck, she smiled and whispered to him that she loved him. He however didn't answer back as he was passed out. She just rolled her eyes and sighed to herself. “Stallions...”

Blueblood and Rarity just held each other, slowly rocking to and fro to the gentle music Blueblood had the orchestra play. Rarity leaned her head against the stallion's chest, placing a hoof there as well while she listened to his heartbeat that seemed to match her own.

Derreck's arms fell to his side as he let out a content sigh. His fiery aura left him as did his massive body mass. Standing up straight, he looked to Luna who clapped joyfully like a little filly. “Indeed, truly wonderful! Bravo, BRAVO!” she cheered and Derreck gave a bow before offering her a hand up from her seat.

Taking his hand, the two of them took a stroll towards the Canterlot Garden, while Evan trailed along like a third wheel, grumbling to himself about Derreck's new attitude.

As the night pressed on, Rarity and Blueblood took a seat together, ordering some fine wine. “Well... Blueblood, I really must apologize-” Rarity began but Blueblood cut her short.

“No Miss Rarity, it is truly I that am sorry. I should've never treated you in such a horrible way. It is something I regret to this very second,” he replied in a very smooth voice. Rarity used her hoof like a fan.

“You really have become a charmer Blueblood. Though, despite what you say, I must really apologize. I was too quick to judge you rather than give you a second chance and that was quite rude of me. So... I'm sorry,” she apologized.

A waiter brought them both a glass of fine wine. Blueblood raised his to Rarity. “A toast then, to our new found friendship,” he offered, to which Rarity nodded and clinked her glass to his. They both took a sip of their wine before setting their glasses down.

Blueblood sighed to himself. “Well... seeing as how we're friends now...” Blueblood trailed off and looked to Rarity. “I don't suppose you'd mind introducing me to your friends tonight?” he asked and Rarity rose a brow.

“My friends? Well... they're all back in Ponyville... I... well, I did hear Applejack saying something about going to her cousin's down south in Apple-” but Blueblood cut her short.

“No-no, I don't mean those washed up ponies. I mean the others. From Canterlot. Fancy Pants, Hoity Toity, Sapphire Shores... the important friends,” he said, revealing his true colors. Rarity's jaw dropped as she realized this had all just been a rouse.

“I... I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!...” She trailed off, eyes burning with fiery rage. In her blundering anger, she cocked back a hoof and slapped him hard across the cheek, an audible SMACK echoing out through the ball room and catching everypony's attention. Grabbing her wine, she splashed it over his head. “You sir are the most undignified pony I have ever met! Goodnight!” she screamed and with that left the ball room in a flustering rage.

Blueblood held his cheek in shock, everypony looking at him. He grunted in embarrassment and rushed out of the room in a different direction.

The night further dragged on and ponies left the closing gala. Derreck and Luna passed through the dimly lit garden, the moon being the only source of light. Luna broke the ever lingering silence. “You know Derreck, we... I've been wondering... how ever did you get those scars?” she asked and he just shrugged.

“Long story. Maybe another time,” he offered with a smile. She smiled back and they found a resting place against the trunk of a large oak tree. Derreck leaned back, removing his eye patch as he closed both eyes. “Thank you Luna,” he whispered quietly, though loud enough for her to hear.

She leaned up beside him, though not touching. “For what?” she asked and he smirked.

“For letting me have fun... for being yourself... I dunno, just... thank you,” he gave her his thanks, a smile coming across his face. Luna sighed and rested her head against his shoulder.

“It should be I who is thanking you,” she whispered back but not another word was spoken for a long time as the duo laid in the basking moonlight.

After some time had passed by, Luna noticed a slight whistling noise. Perking her ears up, she noticed the noise was coming from the big burly man who was dozing peacefully. “Derreck?” she whispered but got no reply.

His deep facial scars gleamed in the night. She watched his big chest rise and deflate with each passing breath, resulting in a gentle whistling snore. She grazed her hoof across his cheeks, feeling his scars.

She remembered her sister... telling her to tap into his dreams and find out the truth. She didn't want to, not then and definitely not now. It was his privacy... but Celestia had said it was for Twilight's sake.

“I'm so sorry,” she whispered an apology as she planted a kiss on his forehead, not even stirring him. Her horn lit up as a tear trickled down her face. He was one of the only ponies... not even a pony, who she could be herself around and she felt as though she was about to betray him in a way.

She leaned over and touched her horn to his forehead. Just as she did, it was like something invisible blew her head back. A flash of white thundered through her mind, forcing her into blank unconsciousness.

Her eyes went solely bleach white as her head was blown back. She sat like that for a moment, head tilted back, as if time itself had stopped at that very moment. After several seconds past, her body fell back and she landed in a heap on the ground in front of Derreck. She lay flat on her back, wings sprawled out and barely moving. The only part of her body that moved visually was her rising and deflating chest as she lay across from the dozing man.

Hours past and the two lay in the garden undisturbed. Finally, a night guard strolled by with a flashlight. “Uh! Your majesty, your sister requests your presence...” he trailed off but when he got no reply, he spoke a bit louder, figuring perhaps she hadn't heard him. One might presume she was asleep but he saw that her eyes were open and staring to the sky. However from his distance he couldn't see her blank white eyes.

“Ahem... your majesty?” he asked, still louder. This time however when he didn't get a reply, he walked up and nudged her. Looking to her eyes, his face turned pale with horror. “PRINCESS CELESTIA!” He cried out as he rushed off to find the regal sister...

Author's Note

I'm not sure what much to say. I had the other chapter ready but I felt as if it didn't really go anywhere so I wanted to wait to release it until I had this finished and it took longer than I figured it would... I dunno, just my useless ramblings.

It's fricken cold in Canada and the exterior wall and insulation is missing from around my bedroom so it's -30 Celsius in my room. I might just sleep on the dog mat tonight by the fireplace.
Cheers everybody/pony

Chapter 49

'Feeling all too real...'

Third person...

Luna's head pounded, feeling a thump in her head for every heartbeat. She felt itchy, dirty and could smell a most awful stench lingering in the air. Straw clung to her fur along with the smell of this dark place.

She arose from her resting place, stretching slightly. She has a kink in her neck due to sleeping the way she had been in the pile of straw. She attempted to illuminate the area with a spell but found she could not muster any magic with her horn. Trying again, she found her powers drained completely yet at the same time she didn't feel particularly exhausted. Biting her lower lip, she squinted her eyes and found her way out of the stable she was in.

Blundering her way out of the stable, she was greeted by the sight of a shanty town. Humans walked along the streets in raggedy clothing. Luna shook the straw from her body then looked around. Quickly thinking back, she came to the assumption this must be the man's dream.

Looking around, she called out the man's name only gaining several stares from nearby people. She stumbled around, not understanding what was going on. Stumbling back, she tripped through the doors of a building and landed flat on her back.

A familiar chuckle perked her ears and she turned to be greeted by a somewhat familiar face. She found herself staring up at Derreck, who held his hand down for her to take. “Der-Derreck?” she asked then held a hoof over her mouth as she realized her voice was slightly off. It seemed younger, more peppy and a tad bit squeaky.

“Indeed. Have a nice nap, Luna?” he asked but she didn't answer at first as she looked back to him. He had black boots which rode high. Brown uniform pants wrapped his legs and were buckled by a belt with a most peculiar belt buckle that had a symbol of a hammer and sickle inside a star.

He had a long dark trench coat on that covered a uniform jacket underneath. The most stunning thing she noticed was his somewhat younger appearance. Though his face still had some wrinkles, they weren't as defined as she remembered but most of all his deep scars were no longer present nor was his left eye damaged.

Derreck motioned for her to take his hand. Letting the big man help her up, she heard talking and whispered chatter coming from a table behind him. Looking back to him, she made mention of his different, younger, appearance. Derreck chuckled. “Well, as do you comrade,” he commented and her eyes went slightly wider.

Derreck took gentle hold of her mane and brought it into the mare's view. Unlike her flowing, transparent mane, it was now the opaque light blue mane like she had after being freed of Nightmare Moon. She gasped loudly but was interrupted by Derreck. “Come along, sit, converse,” he offered her a seat as he took his own. Removing his heavy trench coat, he revealed his undercoat, a light brown uniform with a red epaulet on each shoulder. Each epaulet had 'CA' written in golden letters along with a single thick golden stripe.

Another man looked over. “Derreck... you bring a horse to the table?” the man asked but Derreck just waved it off. Luna spoke in.

“We request a shower...” she trailed off as she sniffed herself then cringed from the horrid stench. The men all stared at the fact a horse was talking. Derreck just muttered a few things to them which seemed to set their peace of mind and also made them chuckle. He turned back to address Luna.

“It isn't raining just yet,” he laughed and Luna rose a brow.

“Raining? What does precipitation have to do with washing one's self?” she asked, again getting a round of laughs from everyone except Derreck and another human at the table. She looked for a moment then realized it was Evan, the other human from Equestria. Derreck's voice interrupted her thoughts.

“Well... Luna, I don't believe the residents would be appreciative if you bathed in their wash water,” he chuckled and she rose a brow.

“Wash water? But if it is for washing why can we not use it to bathe?” she asked curiously and Derreck shook his head as the others were left with strange looks on their faces.

“Not bathing water. Wash water for utensils, cups, plates... washing clothes and bed sheets...” he trailed off and she rose a brow.

“Then where is the nearest bathtub so that we may clean ourselves?” she asked. Derreck looked around then shrugged.

“You will get used to the smell. We all do,” he said and she shook her head as she rubbed her temples in confusion.

“We do not understand. Where are we? What happened to the castle?” she asked and another man spoke up.

“Derreck... what kind of mind did Stalin put into this experiment? A castle. Was the mind one of royalty?” the man asked, addressing Luna and the mare immediately spoke up.

“Stalin? Experiment? Where are we? Where is Canterlot?” she asked and the other men were thrown into confusion.

Derreck huddled Luna close so he could speak more privately. “Don't ask questions. You'll only arise suspicion,” he commented and rose back up in his seat. “Comrade Luna... welcome to our humble abide,” he said and another man spoke up with a quip.

“Sorry about your luck,” he chuckled...

* * *

There was a knocking at the door to the library to which Spike promptly answered. Two royal guards looked down to the dragon who gulped under their fearsome yet expressionless stare.

One guard spoke up. “We request the presence of Princess Twilight Sparkle,” one guard told the dragon who quickly zipped up to Twilight's room. Lassie lay resting on the couch, reading a most lewd and explicit magazine that was covered by a large novel so that anypony who passed by would mistake her for reading something more foal friendly.

Twilight trotted down with a casual pace and was greeted by the guards bowing down. “Oh... heh-heh, that's not really necessary-” she was promptly cut off by one of the guards.

“Ma'am, Princess Celestia requests your immediate presence at the Canterlot Castle. It involves your student and Princess Luna,” he said, this information perking both Twilight's and Lassie's ears. The latter hopped up and over the couch, rushing up to the door and noticing the air-carriage loaded with Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy while Rainbow Dash flew circles above them.

Dash called out. “Come on Twi, this sounds like an emergency!” Pinkie Pie cut in.

“OOOOOoooooOOOH! It sounds so fun! I brought emergency supplies for everyone!” the frilly pink pony commented, pulling a box full of balloons out of nowhere. The rest of the gang just groaned and that's when Twilight took note that despite it being bright and sunny out, the moon was still in the sky.

Lassie spoke up. “What's going on?! What happened to Evan?!” she asked, having heard this had something to do with Twilight's student. The guard disregarded her question.

“This does not concern you,” he mentioned in a deep voice. Lassie was about to speak up as Twilight heaved a saddle bag over her back.

“Just relax Lassie. It's probably nothing. Just wait here and watch the library with Spike, okay,” she said and got a frown from the canine. “It's nothing personal,” she added in but Lassie pointed out to the rest of the group.

“Ohhhh, noooOOOOOooo. Nothing personal. They get to go and they barely know him, but I'm a dog so nooooOOOOOoooo...” Lassie grumbled as she made her way back over to the couch. Twilight sighed sadly and left with the guards, shutting the door behind her.

Lassie lay flat on the couch for a moment, pretending to read her smut magazine as she waited for the carriage to fly away. After several minutes of waiting she hopped back over the couch and called out. “Minions, assemble!” she called out but nothing really happened. “Ahem... hmm... I said... MINIONS! ASSEMBLE!” She called out but still nothing happened.

She laid a paw over her face. “Ugh! For the love of... SPIKE, OWL!” She yelled out and within seconds Spike and Owlowiscious entered the room. “Alright guys listen... something serious has happened-” and she was cut off by Spike.

“Yeah no kidding. The moon is still in the sky and it's nearly noon!” he commented and Lassie groaned with a nod.

“Yes... thank you Mr. Obvious... as I was saying. Something serious has happened to our friend Burdy... and we need to rescue him!” she cheered and the others looked to her with blank expressions. A moment of silence passed before the owl spoke up.

“Who,” it spoke it's only word and Lassie just groaned.

“Come on! This way!” she ordered irritably and the others willingly followed her outside where she stood before Cadence. “Alright, mount up!” the dog ordered but Spike intervened.

“Uhm... shouldn't we ask if we can borrow th-” he was cut off by Lassie.

“Evan could die if we don't rescue him! He might already be dead! The world might be ending!... We have nothing to lose except our friend, now let's boogie!” she ordered. The others didn't need much more persuasion and obliged to the dog's orders.

Lassie hopped into the driver seat and grabbed the keys. Swiping the naughty key, she looked to the instrument panel. “We gotta save 'em Cadence... whatta yah say?” she asked the truck before starting it.

As the diesel engine rumbled and chugged, Lassie smirked. “I thought you'd say that,” she mentioned as she put the truck into drive and pinned the accelerator...

* * *

Derreck sat back in his seat as Luna blinked with disbelief. “We have to wake up,” she commented and one of the other men at the table spoke up.

“We are awake Luna, see?” he said, motioning to the surroundings. Luna was about to speak before Derreck pulled her into whisper.

“Just act like you would regularly...” he said sitting back up and brushing off the shoulder of his uniform. He looked to the group and began to introduce them to Luna. “This, is our senior lieutenant: Alexei,” he said, the man waving. “The man next to him is the junior officer: Boris,” he commented and Luna took note about how clean Boris's clothes were compared to the others.

Derreck introduced each man in their group, one by one. “He is Viktor,” he said, pointing to a man next to Burdy before finally introducing the only other person she knew from beforehand. “And this is-” Luna cut Derreck short.

“Evan...” she trailed off, perking the others' attention by the fact she already knew his name. Even Derreck was slightly confused, holding his forehead as if in some form of conflict. Luna looked around, still confused by everything. She had been in other ponies' dreams before but never had it felt like this. Her magic was completely drained and she could no longer replenish it, trapping her in the surreal dream until they awoke.

Evan sat quietly to himself, cleaning a finer looking rifle than the others had. Luna looked curiously, noting the gun looked completely different than the others. His uniform was also slightly different at the belt line as he had larger pouches filled with magazines opposed to the stripper clips the others had for their bolt guns.

Alexei chuckled as he noticed Luna's interest in the different rifle. “Lucky bastard. Got the last rifle in the batch. We're all stuck with these...” he commented, unslinging his Mosin rifle and leaning it against the table.

Evan laid several springs and rods from the rifle on the table as he cleaned it thoroughly. Alexei spoke up again. “But then again... I've never seen a rifle so difficult to take apart,” he made mention.

Luna turned back to Derreck, no longer wanting to be in this dream. “Derreck, please, wake up,” she said, getting a bad feeling in her gut. Derreck just shrugged and passed over a liquor bottle, disregarding what she had said.

“Drink... it will take your mind off things,” he said. Luna swallowed, a headache starting to come around. This was more than what she had bargained for and further wished she had never agreed to do this.

Boris spoke up. “Derreck... you feed the horse vodka?” he asked with a laugh but Derreck just shrugged. “What if you damage Stalin's experiment?” he asked rhetorically, having believed what Derreck told them about Luna being a science experiment of Stalin's and hence the reason a horse could talk, the group having not noticed the horn hidden beneath Luna's frazzled mane nor the wings covered under her uniform.

Derreck just shrugged off the idea, knowing what Luna really was and wanting to keep it a secret. Luna however pushed the liquor back. “We don't drink-” she began but one of the others cut in.

“Of course we do! We all drink!” the soldier cheered drunkenly. Derreck just sighed as he dipped his head into a palm. Looking over to Evan Luna rose a brow.

“Evan, do you know what is happening? Why do we not have our powers?” she asked but Evan remained silent yet acknowledged her speaking to him. She tried to concentrate, to focus herself and regain enough magic to break free from this dream but found it impossible to summon any form of magic.

Leaning over, she whispered to Derreck. “We can't summon any magic,” she whispered and Derreck nodded.

“There is no such thing as magic here,” he spoke then looked around. “If you haven't noticed... we are no longer in Equestria. We are on Earth...”

Luna whined to him, not wanting to be in the smokey tavern any more. Derreck waved to Burdy who quickly assembled his rifle and walked with them out of the rickety building, leaving the others behind. As they walked along the streets, Luna spoke. “Why can you not wake up. Do you not know this is a dream?” she asked and Derreck simply bit his lip.

“I'm not so sure this is a dream as much as it is... a memory of sorts,” he said and Luna asked another question, one Derreck didn't quite have an answer to.

“What memory? What happens?” she asked but the big man didn't answer...

* * *

Twilight and the group arrived to the castle and were not only greeted by Celestia but a rather impatient Lassie who was tapping one of her hindlegs as the group arrived. As Twilight and the rest of the group disembarked the carriage, Spike hid behind Lassie a little, fearing he may be scorned by Twilight for having left the library relatively unattended at Lassie's demand.

Celestia greeted the group with a nod, being returned with a bow. Twilight looked to Lassie, who was standing protectively in front of Spike and had Owlowiscious perched on her shoulder like a parrot. “Lassie... Spike... Owlowiscious? But... but who's watching the library?” the young princess asked.

Lassie huffed on a paw then rubbed it against her chest. “Don't worry about that. I got a professional crew on the job as we speak,” she announced proudly. Twilight perked a brow.

“Who?” she asked and Lassie just brushed aside her worry.

“Relax. They're more than capable...”

Meanwhile, at the library...

Sweetie Belle struggled to balance a jug of juice in her hooves as she staggered on her hindlegs in front of the fridge, trying to fit the jug into the middlemost of the tall fridge. Scootaloo looked at the young unicorn with a risen brow. “You know... when Lassie said to organize things... I don't think she meant arrange the fridge in alphabetical order...” she said bemusedly.

Sweetie Belle ignored her for the most part but ended up losing her balance, slipping and sending the jug of juice soaring across the kitchen. Apple Bloom entered the kitchen with a carton of eggs balanced on top of her head, only to be greeted by a splashing jug that doused her mane and knocked the eggs to the floor.

Apple Bloom groaned. “Ugh... Sweetie Belle! Look what yah done!” The younger farmer filly complained but Sweetie Belle just shrugged.

“It wasn't my fault! This fridge is too tall, I can't reach!” she squeaked but Scootaloo interrupted them.

“Don't worry girls, I got this!” she informed them as she tossed a towel over the splattered eggs and spilled juice. The three of them looked at the floor and Apple Bloom groaned.

“Nah, yah gots tah scrub it up with like a mop er somethin',” she told the others and spotted a nearby wash bucket and mop. Grabbing the bucket handle with her teeth, she gave it a tug but ended up tipping it over, splashing dirty mop water onto the floor. “Ughh... heh-heh... ah guess ah tugged it a little too hard,” she chimed in her typical southern accent.

Scootaloo smiled as a light bulb seemed to light up in her mind. “I know where there's some more towels!” she announced and rushed to the washroom, returning soon after with some nice bath towels.

“Uhm, Scoots ah-” Apple Bloom began but the other filly didn't bother listening and tossed the bundle of towels all over the floor. “Think those were bath towels...” Apple Bloom said, somewhat in defeat.

The three fillies looked to the mess on the floor. Scootaloo seemed to have another light bulb go off. “It's alright gals. After we dry up this mess, we'll just wash the towels and nopony will know!” she announced and the three joined in a smile.

“That's brilliant Scootaloo! Ah can't believe ah didn't think a that!” the young farmer pony praised the other. Scootaloo nodded as she rubbed a front hoof against her chest.

“It's alright. There's a reason Lassie put me in charge,” she boasted. Sweetie Belle sighed.

“I'm hungry...” she whined then took notice of the left over apple pie perched high up in the fridge. A smile twitched across her lips as she began to climb the racks in the fridge. Scootaloo was about to pipe up but one of the feeble fridge racks bent and sent the young unicorn crashing down along with most of the fridge's content.

With an even larger mess on their hooves, the three fillies groaned. “Aww man... Lassie's gonna be so mad...” Apple Bloom noted and Sweetie Belle brushed away her statement with an even worse fear.

“Forget Lassie, what about Princess Twilight?!” she squeaked.

Scootaloo clapped as she thought of something else, rushing away and coming back with hoof towels and dousing the mess with them. “There... perfect!” she said. Sweetie Belle groaned.

“Ugh... I'm hungry,” she complained and Apple Bloom nodded.

“Yeah, me too!” she whined but Scootaloo brushed their complaining aside.

“Don't worry about it. Lassie gave me a whole bunch of money so we could order food,” she said, pulling out a pouch of bits that had an assortment of coins. There were a few regular bits, four Luna bits and a Celestia bit. Sweetie Belle chirped.

“Why didn't you tell me earlier. I wouldn't have tried to reach for that pie!” Scootaloo sighed.

“I was going to say something but the fridge fell apart before I could tell you... besides, it's nothing. Nopony outside of us will ever know... we'll just bend that rack back into place later. Come on, let's order pizza!”

Back at the castle...

Lassie thought to herself about how the three fillies were doing but shrugged off the thoughts of doubt as she figured they could handle themselves. Looking back to Twilight, she became cross. “And next time you so much as decide to leave me behind when it concerns Evan...” she trailed off as she gave Twilight a squinty eyed look.

Rarity trotted over to the group, having been summoned by Celestia the night before but having been kept in the dark about the subject of what this was about. “Twilight... girls... Celestia, whatever is this about?” she asked in worry but Celestia didn't immediately answer as she turned to leave.

“Follow me. I'm afraid this may be gravely serious...”

* * *

Derreck, Evan and Luna walked along the dirt road of the shanty town. “Well... where exactly are we?” she asked and Derreck smiled.

“Luna... this is Poland,” he informed her.

“So... if this is a memory more than a dream and you know where we are, do you know what happens?” she asked and Derreck shook his head.

“No... this... this dream, it occupies my mind and I remember where we are... who we are... but I do not remember what happens next. It is as though we are living it out again, like we have been sent back in time. I can only remember up to this point,” he stated, the dark night sky glowing across the lands. All the while, Evan kept quiet and to himself while Derreck strolled along with Luna and explained the events prior, everything from the Soviet Union and the great civil war of Russia to the communist leader, Stalin.

They all sat on the outskirts of the town for the longest while, just watching the night sky. After a long while Derreck looked to a stop watch he had in his trench coat's pocket. “Hmm... it's early, perhaps we should...” he trailed off, his ears picking something up. Luna and Burdy sat in silence, the princess speaking up.

“We should what?” she asked but Derreck waved his hand to silence them. “What?” she asked hastily but Derreck instead held a finger to his lips, as to hush them. He tapped one of his ears then pointed to the sky.

“Listen...” he told them. In the far out distance the other two picked up sounds of explosions. They all stood up as hollering in the small town was emitted. Far out in the horizon, the luminous haze of fire and eruptions lit up the night sky near a larger city, shadowy outlines of bomber planes flying overhead.

In moments, Derreck's hearing focused closer to themselves and he pulled his friends to the ground just as a handful of planes rumbled above the town, firing relentlessly upon the population.

Luna's eyes went wide as she witnessed the sights of buildings being blown to smithereens. The sounds of mortars came whistling down, further turning the town into a mass of wreckage and bloodshed. Men, women and children rushed out onto the street, only to be cut down by the onslaught of German bomber planes.

Derreck covered his body atop his friends as an explosion erupted near their position. He quickly scurried to his feet, dragging up his friends as well. “Quickly. We have to find our unit!” he ordered, rushing towards the inferno.

The small group of soldiers stationed at the town flocked into the streets, firing their rifles ineffectively at the overhead planes that were devastating the town. Derreck leapt over some rubble and slid up to the corner of a building wall, looking out to his uniformed comrades down the streets, some of the group from the tavern missing.

“Alexei!” Derreck called out, gaining the senior officer's attention. Derreck waved him over. The man fired again to the sky with his rifle. Firing the old battered rifle as quickly as he could, the lieutenant soon found his rifle void of ammunition. Looking to the sky, he turned to Derreck's position and made a b-line for his comrade.

Luna and Evan huddled closely behind Derreck, the former flinching every time an explosion went off. Debris and soot covered the grounds of the town, smoke rising up into the air. Alexei rushed through the streets, tossing his rifle aside so he could run faster.

Time seemed to slow for Derreck as he waved Alexei over. A lone bomber plane flew in low, machine guns chattering and ripping up the ground. Derreck felt as though he lost his sense of hearing, his surroundings going silent.

The machine guns' shots seemed as though they lined up perfectly towards Alexei, following his footsteps in perfect precision. Derreck's eyes went wide as bullets chewed through his comrade, the senior officer's body sent tumbling along as blood spewed from gaping wounds.

Derreck pulled his body away from the corner, covering Luna and Evan once again as the bomber planes machine guns tore away a slab from the corner of the building, not fully intended for them and just a stray shot.

Derreck immediately stood up and rushed to his lieutenant's side. The man gurgled as death began to overcome him. “Sergeant... serge...” Alexei gasped as he grasped one of the big man's hands. In seconds the man was dead. In a furious anger, Derreck grabbed at the new Tokarev pistol that was holstered at Alexei's side.

Derreck thought to himself. 'You never even got to shoot this...' his thoughts wandered to past memories of Alexei receiving the pistol. His overjoyed look from the honor of receiving the brand new sidearm as a status of his officer rank and to replace his aging revolver.

Derreck pulled back on the slide and let it slam shut as he turned to face another low flying bomber. “For you... Alexei,” Derreck whispered, ready to face his own certain death. Pulling back on the trigger in rapid succession, the pistol let out a snappy report with each shot.

In blind luck, Derreck scored a shot on the pilot of the plane which careened down in a corkscrew motion and collided with the ground over two dozen meters away. However, as the plane plowed into the ground, the bomber's payload was set off and the concussive blast was enough to send the large man hurtling through a nearby building wall. A numbing sensation came over his body, blood drooling down his forehead. His vision blurred as he looked to the streets. His comrades stood no chance against the onslaught of German planes and the mortar shelling.

He looked and saw his longtime comrade Evan leading Luna across the street and to his position. At first he couldn't understand what Luna was saying due to his temporarily deafened hearing. Finally his senses came to and he could hear her distressed voice begging for him to wake up.

Trying to wipe the blood from his face, he only managed to smear it more, further worsening his look. Jamming the pistol that he'd make note to cherish dearly, he rushed back out onto the street and searched for his remaining allies, only to be greeted by the sight of fiery bloodshed.

Dismissing Luna's pleadings for him to wake up, he rushed over to the last known location of his remaining soldiers. Explosions rippled the ground beneath him as he skidded to a halt and leapt into a bombed out crater, Luna and Evan hopping in with him, the former being pulled along by the latter.

Derreck peeked his head up and spotted a lone survivor from the group at the tavern. “Viktor!” Derreck called out, gaining the said man's attention. He waved him over and Viktor first looked to the skies, then to the man in the crater and tossed away his empty rifle as he rushed for the group.

Hopping in with the others, he wept to the senior sergeant. “Sergeant... they're dead... all of them, dead!” he cried and Derreck nodded.

“I know.” Derreck gritted his teeth.

“All of them, even Alexei-” he was cut off by a reacting backhand from Derreck.

“I KNOW! SHUT UP!... Quickly, we must make it to the tavern!” Derreck ordered, Viktor holding his sore cheek.

“The tavern? But why?” Viktor asked in confusion.

“There is a cellar, it will protect us,” he said, scurrying out of the crater and helping the others out as the bomber planes left but the mortar shelling continued. There was no life in the town aside from the group of four who rushed through the streets that erupted with mortar explosions.

Arriving to the nearly demolished tavern, Derreck led the group through the bombed out interior and to a trap door in the back room. He went to open it but found it bound with a lock and chain. Derreck looked to Evan whom still had his SVT-40 rifle and gave him a nod. “BLOW IT OFF!” He yelled over the sounds of the mortar eruptions. The other man didn't need to be told twice and triggered off a single shot that blew away the lock.

Derreck yanked open the trap door and huddled the others down into the cellar room before hopping down himself.

Darkness overwhelmed them, the sounds of explosions shaking the cellar walls. Luna huddled up in a corner, whimpering to herself from the horrid and nerve rattling dream that felt all too real.

Derreck rummaged around in the darkness, using lit matches to find his way. Finally finding what he needed, he lit an old style lamp and positioned it in the middle of the cellar. Luna whispered things, trying to comfort herself.

Viktor sat in one corner with Evan, the two unable to believe their comrades from the unit were dead. Derreck shuffled over to Luna's side and placed his trench coat over her. Luna closed her eyes and tried to remember better times but despite her efforts could not recall more modern times. She could only recall the old times in Equestria, the ones before her banishment.

Time seemed to drag on for eternity but soon she found herself in the darkness of her own dreams, seeing herself play with her sister whilst the two were in their youth. She thought to herself as she dreamt. 'A dream within a dream... is it possible?'

She awoke sometime later to the feel of Derreck stroking his big hands through her smooth mane. He cradled her gently in his arms, letting her rest against him as she slept, her body covered and kept warm under his trench coat.

The lamp had gone out yet light now protruded into the cellar through cracks in the trap door. As Luna awoke, Derreck sat her up then motioned for everyone to be quiet as he drew Alexei's pistol he had retrieved the night before.

Moving to the cellar steps, he readied himself for a possible fight as he pushed open the trap door. Debris that lay atop the door was tossed aside and Derreck hopped up to ground level, only to be greeted by still floating ashes. The tavern was destroyed for the most part, not even the roof remaining.

He called quietly for the others to join him. The group walked along the lonesome streets, a thick layer of ash covering the ground beneath their feet, or in Luna's case, hooves. Derreck looked to the distance. A large cavalry of soldiers moved through the larger city unopposed.

Derreck walked lonesomely to the intersection where Alexei's riddled corpse remained. He knelt down beside the deceased leader and whispered a prayer for him before rummaging through his belt pouches for extra magazines for the pistol, along with the proper holster for it. “Goodbye... my friend,” he said as he stood up and fastened the holster and pistol, along with the magazine pouches, to his own waist.

Luna stumbled over to Derreck in sheer disbelief of the carnage. “Every... everyone's... they're dead... how...” she looked, seeing even the bodies of children laying on the streets. “How could they...” she was struck with utter disbelief.

Viktor arrived with Evan at his side, the former having retrieved another rifle. “Sergeant... what now?” he asked and Derreck looked to the distant city that was overrun with Germans then to the nearby forest in the opposite direction.

“We have to find the front,” he said and Luna perked her ears.

“The front? The front of what?” she asked.

“The war front. We need to link up with our comrades and repel the German swine,” he told the others but Luna interjected.

“We can't... we're not soldiers,” she said, referencing herself but her speech impediment making her use group context rather than singular text.

Viktor looked to her but Derreck spoke first. “We are now all soldiers. There is no exception. The Germans will not care if you are man, woman or child... they will kill you anyway.” He stepped up to Luna. “I know this will be hard for you... but you have to come with me... and most likely... you will have to take a life,” he told her but she instead stepped back.

“We won't... we can't. We don't kill,” she told him but the man simply sighed.

“Then they will kill you,” he told her coldly and turned to Viktor and Evan. “Quickly. To the forest. We will link up with the others...” He trailed off and looked to the gray sky that was filled with smoke. “Wherever they are...”

* * *

The group entered the room where both Luna and the big man had been laid across from each other. Twilight was shaking slightly, mostly in fear, as she stepped up to whom she presumed was her student.

Her facial expression became one of shock and hesitance. “This... who is he?” she asked, staring at the solid face of a different looking man. He had more defining check bones, a squarish chin and deep scars on his face. Dark brown hair was tainted with gray at the sides and the only similar resemblance to her student was that of his left eye patch. “It isn't Evan,” Twilight mentioned.

Celestia stepped up and nodded. “He... perhaps it is some sort of side effect of this induced coma they are stuck in. They were found early in the morning when I realized my sister had not lowered the moon and I had sent out guards to search for her... they may have been like this for hours before we found them. It is impossible to know...”

The group looked at comatose duo who lay still, breathing so regularly one may presume they were just napping. Twilight shook her head. “How... how could this happen?” she asked worriedly but Celestia just shook her head.

“We have yet to find out Twilight Sparkle. I am very afraid for both of their well being...”

* * *

Derreck lay still. Blood oozed out of multiple gunshot wounds and soaked his bullet riddled trench coat and uniform. Traces of glistening blood trickled down his lips. Other wounded soldiers squirmed in pain, some grasping for their rifles. A handful of German soldiers stepped up over the concrete blockade wall and peppered the group with submachine guns.

Blood spoiled the ground as life itself was ripped from the bodies of the soldiers. The Germans laughed to themselves and continued on. Sounds of gunshots continued in the distance, along with the somewhat common sound of cannon fire from tanks.

A crow fluttered down to pick at the corpses, landing first on Derreck's wounded shoulder. Reaching ever so slowly, the man slowly picked out some crumbs of food from his pocket and fed the bird. Satisfied with its meal, the bird fluttered off in a casual manner, not alerting nearby German soldiers.

Movement among the corpses perked Derreck's attention. “Viktor... Luna,” he said, bringing a finger to his mouth. "Sssh." He rolled over a nearby body and retrieved his rifle, motioning the others to follow him along the blockade wall.

Crawling at a snailish pace, the trio made their way down the street, alongside ruined and burnt out buildings. Screams and crying could be heard in the streets, followed by gunshots. Reaching a corner of an intersection, Derreck leaned his back against the cement blockade wall.

He looked to the others, blood still seeping from his wound though at a slower rate then before. Luna spoke up. “Derreck... you're bleeding!” she gasped but Derreck immediately held his hand over her mouth.

“It will mean nothing if we are found and shot dead,” he whispered. Peeking up and over the cement wall, he spotted a fountain in the middle of the street were more of his deceased comrades lay.

Looking above, he saw massive planes rumbling overhead. “Follow me, quickly, to the fountain in the street.” He crept around to the side of the cement barricade and scurried across the street, followed closely by Luna and Viktor. The trio hopped into the fountain of dead bodies, laying flat and out of view.

Derreck leaned up against the fountain wall and sighed as he set his rifle aside. “I have been shot... many times. My wounded shoulder means I cannot fire a rifle today... Luna, I know you refuse to fight... but today, our lives depend on it... Viktor...” he trailed off and looked to the other Russian man.

Viktor nodded and slipped his remaining four shells of ammunition into his Mosin rifle, having exhausted the rest of his ammunition earlier. Derreck retrieved the Alexei's Tokarev pistol from his holster, having just seven shots left.

“Luna... that rifle has five shots... no more, no less... with each shot, there shall be one kill,” he said but Luna refused not only to kill but to even hold the rifle. “Luna... my comrade... my dearest friend... if you do not help us today than we will never leave this fountain alive,” he told her and she bit her lip, a tear coming to her eye.

Over the past year she had seen enough bloodshed then she had ever saw in Equestria. Now in the streets of Stalingrad, she realized things were much worse when fighting got close as they seemed to do every single day. Each day was not only a physical struggle but a mental one. Each day trying to keep herself sane despite the horrors amassing themselves around her.

Derreck tried shoved the rifle into her hooves but she still refused to take it. “If I could... I would do this for you... but today, I cannot. Today, you will become a soldier. Today... you will take a life in exchange for your own. You must... or we will all di-” he was cut off by mortified screaming.

Derreck, Luna and Viktor dared to peak over the fountain wall to see a woman stagger out onto the streets from a burning building. A child rest in her arms, blood littering his body. Before her sobs of loss could continue, the chatter of submachine guns rattled in the streets and ended her life abruptly.

The trio slumped back into the fountain. Derreck spoke to the other two. “These... are the darkest days of the Nazi occupation of Europe. Everything hangs in the balance of the next few days... perhaps weeks... maybe even months. If we allow the Germans to further advance into our motherland, than all is lost. They will take Russia and all it's natural resources... then move onto the rest of Europe... and then the world...” he trailed off and looked to Luna.

“And today, is no different. Luna, I ask you... I beg you. My friend, help us defend our lands from their treachery.” He held the rifle to her.

“We are... we do not kill. We cannot kill,” she whispered. Derreck thrust the rifle into her hooves, not taking no for an answer. He couldn't, or they'd all be dead. Peaking up over the fountain wall, he pointed to a building that was diagonally across from where they had come from.

In front of the building stood two German soldiers mingled casually despite deadly firefights erupting a mere few hundred yards away in other parts of the city. “Viktor... the one on the right,” he ordered the young soldier who nodded and aligned his sights.

Derreck helped Luna set up her rifle, which she was constantly reluctant hold. “Okay... Luna, the soldier on the left. Place the front blade sight between the notch in the rear sight. Make sure the top of the blade is level to the top of the rear sight...” he trailed off and gave her the basic instruction on how to shoot the rifle. They only needed to dispatch the two soldiers and they could make a b-line for the solid building undetected.

Luna shook her head. “We can't... we cannot kill-” she began but Derreck cut her short.

“It is just a dream! Now do it, or we will die!” Derreck hissed. Viktor looked to him in confusion but quickly pushed the thought aside as he steadied his aim for the kill. Luna choked back a sniffle and wiped a tear from her face. She struggled with the rifle, resting the fore-end on the edge of the fountain wall and putting her right hoof to the trigger guard. Though designed for human fingers, she managed to grip the trigger with her hoof just enough to be able to set the rifle off.

Clenching her eyes shut, she shook her head. “We don't want to...” Luna cried but Derreck put a hand over her mouth.

“You must. It's just a dream, relax!” Derreck hissed, making sure not to arouse the attention of the guards. With Luna's shooting position they were in plain view. “Steady... steady...” Massive planes rumbled overhead. “NOW!” Derreck ordered. Viktor's rifle cracked off, his shot somewhat muffled by the sound of the planes passing overhead and making it sound as though just another shot in the distant fighting.

Viktor's target dropped in a heap while the other flinched and ducked down. Luna sucked back and cringed but didn't fire. “LUNA!” Derreck roared. The guard began to shout and holler, quickly gaining the attention of others.

Viktor racked on the stiff bolt of his rifle and cracked off another shot, clipping the second guard high and in the shoulder. “LUNA!” Derreck roared but she just looked away.

“We cannot kill... Besides, it is just a dream right?” she wept. Gunshots chattered in the streets ahead of them, bullets chipping away at the fountain wall. Pulling Luna down, Derreck hissed a vicious curse.

Viktor quickly fired off two more shots before ducking down. “I'm out!” he shouted and Derreck tossed him Luna's unused rifle. Drawing his own pistol the two men stood up and quickly capped off the remainder of their ammunition in quick succession, dropping seven incoming soldiers.

Dropping back down Derreck cursed to himself as he peeked through a crack in the fountain wall. Over a dozen soldiers poured towards them, weapons chattering. Without even so much as a grenade, they were sitting ducks. Luna wept to herself, crying that she was sorry.

Just as all seemed lost and the Germans we nearly on top of them, a lone figure leapt up to the top of the fountain. A bright muzzle flash erupted from the short barrel along with a sharp chattering. Empty brass spat out the side of the small firearm as the gun cycled through the cylindrical magazine's reserves.

After several short seconds the gun ran dry, the man standing in his place for several seconds, barrel smoking. Derreck coughed, holstering his pistol as he peeked up over the fountain wall. The oppressing soldiers had all but been cut down.

Evan hopped down from his perch, tossing the empty PPsh-41 aside in favor of his loaded SVT-40. Derreck chuckled. “Like an angel's blessing... come, to the building, they will have heard the shots.” Derreck led the group across the body riddled street and into the building.

Evan pulled open Derreck's trench coat, revealing his rather grave injuries. He pushed Evan's hand away with a smirk. “I'll be fine... flesh wounds,” he joked. Luna slumped in a corner, crying to herself in shame. Derreck looked to Evan who was sharing his interchangeable ammunition with Viktor. “You two, secure the hallways...” he ordered. The men left to do as ordered. Derreck turned and walked towards Luna slumping down beside mare.

His breath was raspy, his lungs struggling to keep up with his body's demand for oxygen. Luna began to sputter out an apology but Derreck just waved it off. “Relax... in the end we are all still alive... I should not have asked you to do it,” he sighed. Luna dipped her head into her hooves.

“How much longer will this dream last?” she whispered, already traumatized by the events she had witnessed over the past year. Derreck exhaled deeply.

“I am not sure...”

* * *

The others all sat around the comatose pair, waiting for the moment they woke up. Twilight looked to Applejack who didn't really have an affiliation with either of the two. “Applejack... you know you don't really have to stay here. I know you have family matters to attend to and I would never hold it against you-” Twilight began but Applejack cut her short.

AJ shook her head. “Nuh-uhh. Twilight, he's yer student an' ah'm one a yer closest friends. Ah know Braeburn'll understand,” she replied, giving Twilight some peace of mind. Rainbow Dash nodded.

“YEAH! We're not gonna ditch you just cause we barely know the guy!” Dash told her. Fluttershy smiled timidly as she spoke up.

“He may be a little bit... hard headed and sometimes scary, but he's your student,” she said in her soft little voice. Rarity spoke up as well.

“And as your student, that makes him our friend as well... more or less,” she added in. Applejack nodded.

“An' friends look out fer others friends, always!” Most of the group smiled towards Twilight before being interrupted by Pinkie Pie who was hopping around with a set of party balloons.

“Yeah and besides, coming to Canterlot is always...” she trailed off with a deep inhale. “TOTALLY AWESOME!” She screamed out, confetti bursting out of her cannon. A bright smile splayed across her face until she remembered the reason they were here. “Oh... and we're totally all her for Ivan,” she commented and Applejack just groaned, dipping her head into her hooves as Rarity turned to Celestia.

“And we're here for you too princess.” She gave a nod which Celestia returned along with her thanks. With a sigh, she looked to her sister who was in a deep sleep.

“I just hope she can forgive me after this is all through...”

* * *

Derreck burst through a building's front doors in the streets of Stalingrad, his submachine gun chattering and moving down several German soldiers. He waved to the others. “This way! Hurry!”

The others rushed through the doorway just as a German Panzer IV turned the corner of the street. Derreck's eyes went wide as he rushed the others through the doors. Ever ominously, the turret cranked towards them. “Up the stairs!” Derreck ordered, rushing up behind the group. The tank cannon fired, the round erupting on the bottom floor and shaking the entire building.

The group fell to their knees as the rickety old staircase collapsed, dropping their bodies back to the ground floor. As their combined weight slammed down, the floorboards gave out as well, dropping them into a basement.

Blood oozed down Derreck's face as he stood up, ears ringing. The others all moaned and groaned, slowly trying to regain their footing. German shouting could be heard above, coming closer to the large hole in the floor.

Derreck loaded a fresh drum magazine into the submachine gun and aimed it at the opening in the floor. Three Germans peered down the hole with rifles drawn but weren't expecting the greeting they got.

Derreck held back on the trigger only briefly, swinging the gun across a horizontal arc. The gun's muzzle flashed brightly in the dark basement, illuminating Derreck's rigid aging facial features. After only a second the gun was silenced as Derreck let off on the trigger. The enemy soldiers all fell down the hole and landed around the big man in clumped heaps.

Viktor and Evan stood to their feet, wiping their face of soot and blood. Derreck rushed to Luna's side, pulling the heavy collapsed debris off her back and heaving her over his shoulder. “Follow me,” Derreck ordered as he led the others out of the basement and through the back doors of the building, leading them into back alleyways. Derreck set Luna down to regain her composure and she followed the group, sticking close.

Skidding to a stop near the exit of the alley, Derreck instead plundered through a back alley door and led the group into another building. Slowing down, he let his submachine gun lead the way.

Going floor to floor, the group finally came to a stop as Derreck spotted a dead body of one of their comrades in arms. His body lay in the center of a bombed out room, most of his head missing and his SVT-40 rifle, fitted with a pu scope, laying by his side. “Stay low and try to keep out of sight,” he ordered as he began to creep into the room of the deceased body.

The walls were for the most part destroyed, likely the work of a tank. As the group entered the room, the hairs on the back of Derreck's neck prickled up. The glint of a far off scope optic flashed. “GET DOWN!” Derreck roared as he jumped into Luna.

The distant gunshot echoed through the streets, a bullet blazing through Derreck's left shoulder but just missing Luna. However, a spew of blood still littered her face. Derreck rolled their bodies out of the sniper's line of fire, Viktor and Evan slipping down to the ground and laying flat on their bellies.

Derreck grasped his shoulder and Luna immediately tried to inspect it. Derreck pinned her to the floor. “Down... stay down!” he grunted. Luna was breathing heavily. Had Derreck not jumped in front of her...

“Why us? It could have been aiming for one of them,” she said in a hushed tone but Derreck didn't answer her.

He shimmied across the floor on his back and kicked the rifle towards Evan. “Use the rifle...” He chuckled and closed his eyes. “It seems I am always unable to use one in these times of need,” he laughed.

Evan took the rifle and tried to rack the bolt but found it jammed shut, the rifle itself having been hit from shrapnel. The scope however was still in operable condition. Evan turned to Derreck who looked to the deceased body. To remove the scope they needed specialized tools, namely a tiny little screwdriver.

Derreck shimmied closer to the body, fearing he may be in the sniper's view at any given point. Reaching the body he began to rummage through the man's pouches. Finding nothing at first, he used his weak arm to reach up to the jacket chest pockets of the dead man. As he did, a gunshot tore through his left tricep, ripping open another gash in his arm.

He grunted in pain and instead dragged the body away and into the corner. Blood oozed down his shot up arm as he pilfered through the body's jacket, finally finding the scope tool set and tossing it to Evan.

The other man quickly removed the scope and slid the scope onto his own rifle which luckily had rails to make scope mounting accessible. Tightening up the scope, Evan leaned up against the bottom of the blown out wall. Viktor looked to Derreck. “Where was he?” he asked.

Derreck shut his eyes and envisioned the events again. “Two hundred meters down the street, left side... fourth story window,” he replied. Evan nodded and crept out of the room with Viktor to find another shooting location, this room having been compromised as a sniper location.

Luna turned back to Derreck and brought up the subject from before. “Why did you chose us?” she asked and Derreck shook his head as he spoke.

“It doesn't matter.”

Evan and Viktor continued up another flight of stairs and into another room on the fifth story. Evan scurried up to the window and peeked down the street. Viktor looked to the silent man as he set up the sniper rifle. “Do you see him?” Viktor asked but the man didn't answer. Instead, he set up the rifle and peered through the scope.

Looking through the magnified optic, he searched for the telltale signs of his enemy, quickly finding it as though he knew exactly where he was.

Gently depressing the trigger, Evan held the rifle tight to make sure it didn't move to much while firing. The rifle boomed, emitting a bright muzzle flash and spitting out the bullet at sonic speeds.

The optic however was off and the bullet chipped into the building far below his point of aim. He dropped to the floor and motioned silently for Viktor to do the same. No sooner had Viktor dropped to the floor, a bullet ripped into the wall where he had been standing just a second before. Evan waved for him to follow and crawled into another room. Thinking back on what had just happened, the man readjusted the scope, having no doubt in his mind that the scope was tuned for the other rifle and not his own, though he'd make the necessary adjustments later.

He dialed the scope in for what he believed would make the killing shot then leveled the rifle sights out to the streets, making sure his barrel wasn't protruding out the window. Doing a once over, the man found his target once more in the same spot he had been prior. Placing the sights on the sniper's midsection, Evan began to gently depress the trigger once again, thinking to himself that his adversary must be a rookie for not having changed his position.

The gun jerked and spat out another bullet, this time striking it's target. Though he aimed for the midsection, the shot was slightly off and struck the enemy's throat.

Derreck leaned his back to the wall as he smiled in unison with Evan, the former muttering to himself. “Perfect.”

* * *

Celestia shook her head in shame. “This is all my fault.” The others looked to her in confusion, unsure of what she meant. “My sister has had glimpses of his nightmares. She said they terrified her to the point that she was reluctant to do this,” she said, Rarity picking up in question.

“Do what, your highness?” she asked, asking the question that was no doubt in everypony's thoughts.

“I asked her to tap into his mind, into his dreams and find out the exact reasons for his...” she turned to Twilight. “Particular mental states. She was...” she trailed off, looking to the ceiling as a tear trickled down her cheek. “She wouldn't do it at first. Truth be told, I wasn't sure if she'd do it at all but I told her it was for your sake,” she said as she looked to Twilight. “And now I have yet again failed my sister,” she turned away from them, tears formulating in her eyes and showing her emotions in full.

The others all cuddled up around her, squeezing her into a tight group hug. Twilight spoke the group's mind. “Don't worry princess. We all make mistakes, some worse than others. It's what makes us ponies. Don't worry about this. In the end everything will turn out right, I'm sure of it,” she assured the elder princess.

Celestia looked to her former student. “You... you think so?” she said as she sucked back a sniffle. Twilight nodded. “Promise?” she asked hopefully. Twilight smiled as she began through a set of motions.

“Cross my heart, hope to fly-” at the last moment however, Pinkie Pie interrupted with a scream of joy as she leapt forwards.

“STICK A CUPCAKE IN YOUR EYE!” She squealed with laughter, piling a rather large cupcake, almost a cake, into the elder princess's face. They all stood in horror as Pinkie giggled uncontrollably at the seemingly innocent joke. Quickly realizing that this was not the time for such shenanigans, she went quiet. The regal ruler opened her eyes, most of her face covered in icing.

Celestia blinked and slowly moved her tongue around her lips, licking up what she could before smiling brightly and letting out a playful laugh. At first the others were shocked but soon joined into the laughter.

* * *

Derreck did up the buttons on his trench coat that was stitched in many spots where bullet holes used to reside. Standing to his full height he made himself presentable then looked to his equine companion, the sole reason they had been summoned.

He knelt down and tried to brush her mane. Luna stepped back for a moment. “What are you doing?” she asked in confusion, having already done up her mane.

“He cannot be allowed to see your horn... or your wings,” the big man mentioned, looking over her soviet uniform. He began to brush her mane and took notice that the color had been ever changing since the first days in Poland during the Nazi's invasion into Russia. He made no mention of this and finally straightened her mane in such a way that her horn was not visible yet she looked rather presentable.

“Do you know this man?” she asked and he nodded.

“Everyone in the Soviet Union knows of him... maybe even the world,” he replied and she rolled her eyes with a shiver of fear.

“We meant have you ever met him personally?” she asked again and Derreck let out a long exhale as they began to walk down the hallways of the grand building.

“Yes,” he replied but said nothing more. Luna was too curious to be satisfied with such an answer.

“Well... what was he like?” she asked, wanting to know more before she met the man.

“We went hunting together before.” He stopped for a moment and looked to Luna. “He hated hunting...” he trailed off and remembered something gravely important. “Do not look, or make mention of his left arm,” he ordered her and the princess titled her head in curiosity. “His left arm is... he's temperamental about it. If he feels like you are staring at it... we will never leave this building alive,” he told her and Luna gulped.

They stood before the guarded doors of the man's office. The guards opened the doors and let them through. Stepping through the doors, Luna got her first glimpse of the man who had summoned them. Derreck had called him 'Stalin'.

The man looked to her with a squinted look, getting a good visual of her. He stood up, right arm at his side and left hand tucked into his coat. His voluptuous mustache covered most of his lips as he strolled forwards. His hair was slicked back and graying at the sides.

He turned to Derreck and addressed him first. “Ahh... Derreck,” he spoke in a rather charismatic voice. “How is the front these days?” he asked and the big man didn't deter as he spoke.

“A walk in the park, your greatness,” he replied, a little out of style for how he usually addressed people. The man smiled, his pock marked face wrinkling as he did.

“Indeed. And this... this is the horse... it is blue?” he mentioned, asking a question mostly to himself as he inspected every inch of Luna, touching her mane and fur even scratching behind her ear at one point. “I don't recall asking the scientists to create a talking horse... a blue one no less... and you say I ordered it?” he asked Derreck while still looking to Luna.

“Yes sir.” Derreck licked his lips. “The scientist who delivered it told me it was your strict design. As proof of Mother Russia's scientific advances beyond the rest of the world, along with your genius...” Derreck trailed off.

Stalin leaned in close to Luna's face, taking a sniff before leaning back and thinking to himself. “And how is a horse that talks beneficial to the glorious mother land?” he asked, recalling that he had never once asked for such a creature.

“The way the scientist put it... if our horses fight alongside the soldiers, then we can have a definite advantage over the Germans. With a horse's inept senses, they can detect enemy soldiers further away and tell us exactly what's on their mind. Also, with their speed and agility advantage over men and tanks, they can even strike from behind enemy lines before they even know what hit them... that's what the scientist said,” Derreck lied, trying to come up with the best excuse he had on hand.

Stalin stroked his chin, thinking to himself. “No scientist of mine has made mention of such a creature being created...” he trailed off, giving Derreck a squinty eyed look.

Derreck didn't answer and merely shrugged. “I'm not sure, your lordship. I was told the orders had come directly from you for me to accompany this horse into every battle...” Derreck trailed off and Stalin frowned.

“I made no such order!” he snarled and Derreck gulped.

“Only what I was told sir,” he replied.

“Then it was a lie! And this horse... it too is a lie!” he growled, Luna taking a cautious step back. Derreck quickly interjected.

“Sir! If I may!” he quickly spat out, gaining Stalin's attention. “Even if she is a lie-” he was quickly cut off by the stout man who stepped over to the bulky, looming man and looked him dead in the eyes with a fiery glare.

“She?” he asked and Derreck nodded.

“The horse is a mare sir... even if she is a lie... she creates havoc among the German front. Rumors of a talking horse among the ranks of the Red Army who fights alongside the men and women... it shreds the Nazi's moral to ruins by the fact that even their most elite snipers cannot track and eliminate her.” Derreck stood in silence and the man began rubbing his chin again.

“Yes... indeed...” he said, beginning to go into a state of delusion. “I have heard great stories about this... talking horse... the 'Blue Death' they call her,” he mentioned, no such term having actually been used. “Even Hitler himself shakes in his knickers at the very mention of it. How could a country he considers filthy and poor create such a marvelous beauty? What other great fates have we created that he not yet knows about?” he asked, starting to lose his mind.

He turned back to Derreck and Luna, holding his fist high as he spoke. “SHE.. is the pinnacle of Russian might, the ultimate testament to Mother Russia's power... MY power!” he shouted then stepped forwards and stroked Luna's cheek, the mare going stiff with fear of the man's delusional way.

Stalin then turned to Derreck and nodded. “Senior sergeant Parker... if you would please... escort our hero to Berlin... and crush the Third Reich!” Stalin ordered. Derreck gave his nod and began to escort Luna out but just as they were about to leave, Stalin called out for them to stop. “Senior sergeant Parker... the rumors say the horse can talk... yet this whole time I did not hear a single syllable from her,” he said sternly. Derreck nudged Luna who in turn took a reluctant bow.

“Your lordship,” she said with great courtesy, holding back her defiance. Stalin smiled and gave them a wave as they left. Luna groaned but Derreck just ruffled her mane.

“I know you probably hated that... but know it was one of the most courageous things you will ever do,” he told her and she rose a brow. He just smiled. “Trust me...”

She sighed and nuzzled into his side. "Thank you. Thank you for calling us a she rather than an it. It... well, thank you..." she said affectionately.

* * *

Twilight looked to her student, or whom she believed to be her student. His facial features had changed so dramatically it seemed implausible for him to look this way despite what she remembered from the day before when he left.

A tear trickled down her face as she placed her cheek to his, wondering just what exactly was going through his mind...

* * *

Russian tanks plundered into German territory for the first time, aided by the masses of infantry. Gunshots and explosions ripped through the air. The shouting of soldiers drowned out by their own rifles as they charged towards the enemy encamped in the hills.

Derreck rushed forwards with his submachine gun, the firearm chattering viciously in his hands. Others charged behind him but the only ones he knew personally were that of his original squad.

He moved at a rampant pace, trying vigorously to push his body beyond its limits and reach the German defenses. His facial features we now heavily scarred from battle, wrinkling as he howled in anger. Luna kept her pace behind the others, having never once fired her rifle and having no intention of ever doing so.

In the far out hills, an large flack gun turned towards the advancing tanks and troops. Derreck took notice but it was far too late to react properly. The massive cannon fired, propelling a large explosive shot towards the mass formation.

The shot impacted near Derreck, the explosion not nearly close enough to injure him but the concussive force still enough to send him hurtling to the side, his submachine gun tossed through the air. He landed in a heap while Evan, Viktor and Luna rushed to his side as others rushed by them.

“Derreck!” Luna called, holding his head up in her hooves. The big man groaned, clenching his eyes shut as he wiped soot and dirt from his face. Gunshots and cannons boomed in the background of his impaired hearing. A numb ringing sound echoed in his ears as he stood up with Luna's help. He looked to the flack cannon in the distance that rained down hell on his comrades.

He then turned to the forest not far away to the right side of the cannon. “Quickly, this way. To the forest. Evan, you can use your rifle to pick off the crew of that cannon from the depths of the forest!” he ordered, leading his squad towards the dense mass of trees.

Derreck drew Alexei's pistol, the one he had cherished for so long. They reached the confines of the forest without issue, the mass horde of Soviet soldiers occupying the German's attention for the time being. “Viktor... you lead the way,” he ordered.

Viktor stepped up to the front of the group, leading the way with his rifle that was fitted with a long bayonet. The group found their way towards the side of the forest, now having a clear shot of the artillery crew just a few hundred meters away.

“Viktor, Luna, cover our behind,” Derreck ordered as he pulled out his binoculars. Looking through the magnification lens, he peered over the artillery crew that by now had undoubtedly killed hundreds of men.

Evan knelt down and leaned against a tree trunk, using a low branch to support his rifle as he too peered upon the far off troops through his rifle's scope.

Derreck spoke up. “The radio crew... take out the operator first.” Evan leveled his sights and dialed in the scope for the range. Sighting the tip of the vertical post on the midsection of the radio operator, Evan gently squeezed back on the trigger. The rifle jerked into the man's shoulder, the gun's muzzle flaring violently as a high velocity round was spat down range.

Derreck watched as only a split second later the radio operator slumped over. The commander ducked his head and pointed his pistol in several direction as the cannon crew continued to fire, unaware they were being targeted.

Evan squeezed off a second shot that took the commander off his feet and put him to his final rest. The sounds of his gunshots echoed through the forest but were absorbed into the mass chaos of the battlefield.

Derreck peered through the binoculars and picked out another target. “The coordinator,” he ordered. Seconds later a spurt of blood erupted out the target's backside as Evan put a bullet through his chest.

The men operating the cannon stopped as their fellow crew mate collapsed. Thinking it was the infantry closing in at first, the peeked over the sandbags, only to find the infantry still far off and battling with entrenched front line defense.

Presuming it perhaps to be a stray shot, he called out for another coordinator, only then to realize their radio operator and commander had also been shot. “They're onto us. The one on the far left,” Derreck ordered, his order completed only moments later as Evan's rifle fired and the target dropped like a sack of potatoes.

“Again, the man in the middle,” he ordered. Evan fired again. “The last one!” Derreck shouted, his order again answered by the report of the sniper rifle.

The silent man lifted his head from behind the scope to gaze across the horrendous battlefield. Seconds past when suddenly the scope on his rifle shattered, kinetic force ripping the rifle from his hands as he was kicked back.

Derreck shouted to the others. “SNIPER! THEY'VE SPOTTED US!” He roared. He looked back to the battlefield to search for the threat, only to find a much larger foe posing a threat to their lives. A second artillery cannon was turned their way.

“GET DOW-” Derreck was cut short as the cannon shot struck nearby, knocking down trees and blowing dirt into the air.

German shouting could be heard nearby as gunshots began to sputter in the nearby distance. Men dressed in green camouflage, that was further coated with leaves and brush, charged forwards. Derreck grunted as he stood up and regrouped with his squad. “German elite!” he snarled as he readied his pistol. “This is going to be a vicious fight!”

Evan knocked off what remained of his busted scope from the rifle and began to peck off rapid aimed shots at the incoming soldiers. Derreck turned to Luna. “Get back, behind me!” he ordered, knowing full well she wouldn't want to kill.

Viktor leaned up against a tree and began to pop off shots with his aging bolt rifle. The elite soldiers closed in on the small group, laying down supporting fire with buzzing machine guns and submachine guns as rifle wielding soldiers charged up the sides.

“Watch our flank!” Derreck ordered, snapping off several shots with Alexei's pistol. Viktor yanked the pin on an F1 grenade and hurled it at the flanking soldiers. The eruption was loud while the effects were devastating to the soldiers it killed and maimed.

Evan's rifle continued to fire in rapid succession, each muzzle flash a sign that another soldier was dead. Derreck continued to fire until Alexei's pistol ran dry, the slide locking back. He went to reload but stopped dead in motion as a grenade bounced nearby. He flinched but managed nothing else as he was tossed against a tree trunk from the erupting explosion.

Luna watched in horror as elite soldiers closed in on Viktor whose rifle ran dry. The brave soldier jabbed his bayonet into the gut of a soldier who tumbled forwards and knocked Viktor to his back.

Other soldiers quickly closed the gap and began to ruthlessly kick and beat the downed man. Evan's flank now widely exposed, an elite soldier fired at the man's blindside, clipping him in the lower gut. The bullet tore through him, ripping open a gash in not only his body but his uniform as well.

Evan let out a silent gasp of pain as he fell to his knees then turned and fired three rapid shots that took the flanking soldier off his feet. More soldiers charged him head on. One soldier fired a submachine gun, several shots tearing the man. Rips and tears shredded his uniform as bullets grazed and ripped through his body.

A bullet clipped his left thigh, bringing him to a slouch. Two more shots plowed into his abdomen, one in his lower gut and one up high on the left side of his chest. Another lucky shot clipped his right shoulder, further ripping his uniform.

He clenched his eyes as he gritted his teeth, the rifle firing wildly in one hand and only gaining one random shot on a soldier's gut. More automatic fire shredded the ground near Evan's body, some shots plowing into him and finally knocking him to his back.

Derreck rose up and fired Alexei's pistol once more. Three shots towards Evan's location put two soldiers down. He swung his aim towards Viktor's location and took four of the men off Viktor. He was about to swing his aim back towards Evan's location when a German elite officer plowed into Derreck, taking him by surprise and off his feet.

The elite soldier drove Derreck's back into the ground before beginning to pummel his face with punches. The big man was barely fazed by the blows and rocked his body to one side, flipping their bodies over so he was on top.

The man only needed to throw one punch and the elite officer was dead. But instead of getting back into the fight, Derreck began to crush the officer's head in a fury of punches, turning the dead man's skull into pulp.

The hairs on the back of his neck prickled up and he turned, only to see a group of soldiers charging him with MP40 submachine guns. The gun's chattered and chugged, ripping up the ground around him before going in for the kill and riddling his body with a storm of lead.

He was knocked off the dead officer's body as bullets ripped through him, chewing holes in not only his body but his trench coat as well. Derreck thought to himself. 'Aww... bastards...'

He lay in a collapsed heap as the elite soldiers surrounded him, guns pointed in his still living face. They began shouting things in Germans he could barely understand and he merely spot a glob of blood in one of their faces.

Luna whimpered to herself. She had been in fierce battles before during Equestrian conflicts but nothing in her entire life had been as horrendous, vicious, brutal or terrifying as what she had experienced over the course of the past few years during this human war.

She clenched her eyes shut, knowing full well if she didn't do something, her friends would all die. She knew what she had to do...

Her eyes stayed shut as she gritted her teeth, digging down deep. 'Our friends... MY, friends... will die if I don't do this...' she thought to herself, her fur darkening with color along with her mane which started to straighten out. Her horn began to glow despite the lack of magic in the world.

A German soldier leveled the sights of his pistol to Derreck's head, ready to execute him first for being the ranking soldier among the group. Just as he was about to pull the trigger, the pistol was coated in a nightly dark blue and yanked from his hands.

The pistol, floating in the air and coated in Luna's magical aura, turned on its former owner. The Germans all gasped as their own weapons were yanked from their hands and tossed away. The leading soldier gulped as the pistol pressed to his forehead and fired, blowing out the back side of his skull.

The rapid firing MG42 was yanked from its perch and laid down a stream of death upon the remaining elite soldiers, bullets shredding the men to pieces. The ones who were spared screamed in absolute horror and fear as they ran off into the forest.

Luna opened her eyes with a gasp, the pistol and machine gun falling from the air as her aura dissapeared. Tears flowed from her eyes as she bared witness to her doing, the death she had caused.

Evan staggered over, blood dripping from his uniform. Viktor stumbled over, severe bruises covering his face and puffing out his cheeks. Derreck crawled over to a tree and lay slumped up against it, blood oozing out of several gunshot wounds.

Viktor gasped at the sight of his comrade and friend. “SERGEANT!” He gasped, rushing over but Derreck held up a hand and pointed to Luna.

“She... is the hero today... she saved all of our lives... you owe her more than you will ever know and not just for saving your lives,” he said, giving his nod to Luna.

Sometime later...

Derreck wrapped up the last of his wounds, walking around like the gunshots barely fazed him. Evan did the same, though his wounds were much less severe than the Sergeant's. Viktor downed a pint of Vodka as he sighed to himself.

The group settled themselves in a small encampment. Radio operators and nurses flocked the area as the tended to their business. Derreck looked to Alexei's pistol then to the far off horizon and setting sun. He whispered prayers to himself, praying for the safety of his friends and saying a small prayer he hoped Alexei could hear.

A Studebaker truck pulled into the makeshift base and began offloading new equipment. Derreck stood up and looked to the equipment being offloaded. He looked to his group who were, other than Luna, mending their wounds. “I need a new rifle,” Derreck told them and made towards the truck. Luna stood up and followed him silently.

Derreck made his way over to the equipment boxes that had been unloaded. Looking around, he took note of which ones were rifles and ammunition and which were medical supplies, radio parts and other miscellaneous items.

He took out a knife and pried open a crate, retrieving a random rifle without looking and simply walking away with a casual pace, Luna following closely behind. As Derreck found himself a more secluded spot, he looked to the rifle, eyes going wide.

Luna stopped as she noticed his gaze. Derreck looked over the rifle and actioned the curved bolt. The rifle had a silky smooth touch to the wood's finish and the bolt actioned smoother than he ever thought it would.

Setting the stock of the rifle into his shoulder, he peered through the 3.5x magnification scope. “I meant to take a regular rifle... instead... I was gifted by this...” He mentioned to Luna. Lowering the sights, he turned to her.

Derreck stood for a moment in silence before noticing a live Trillium flower growing nearby that had been unaffected by the conflict. To Derreck it was a sign of beauty among the battlefield. Something so innocent and unaffected by death yet still filling his heart with warmth. “Trillium...” he trailed off silently, figuring that would be a suitable name. Luna paid his mingling no mind and spoke her mind.

“Today... I... I-” she was cut off as Derreck held a finger to her mouth.

“Today... you saved our lives. Today, you became a soldier...” he trailed off and smiled. “Today, it is 'I'... not 'We',” he commented and she realized what he meant.

“I... uhh... I killed.” She couldn't help but feel strange as those words, that single syllable, that single lettered word, left her mouth so naturally. But unfortunately it wasn't a time to rejoice. She felt inwardly guilty for ending many lives. “How do you... do it?” she asked but the big man just shrugged.

“Always remember... for you, this is just a dream. Something that never happened,” he told her and she looked up to him, a tear in her eye.

“And for you?” she asked but he didn't answer. Feeling so ashamed of herself, she drove herself into him, nestling her head against his chest for comfort as she began to weep. Derreck brushed her mane, stroking it gently as he held her in a hug.

He thought to himself as he held her. 'War... ends lives more than just physically.'

* * *

The day became late and the group got ready to retire for the night. The only ones who decided to remain in the private room were Celestia, Twilight and Lassie. Giving their farewells for the night, the others made to their own quarters which Celestia had ordered to be prepared.

Twilight sat watching in silence. Every so often the comatose duo would twitch and squirm, sometimes even doing so much as a kick but then fall back into seemingly peaceful resting. She couldn't help but to wonder worriedly what was happening in their dream realm.

Celestia leaned her head in close to whisper both a prayer and an apology to her sister before laying down on the ground beside her sleeping sister. Twilight looked to the larger princess and spoke. “Celestia... what are you doing?” she asked, wondering why the regal ruler was taking residence on the floor.

“This is all my doing. If it had not been for my persistence, this would have never happened. And now my sister is immobilized, along with your student. If anything, it should be my duty to stay by their side until they wake, no matter what sort of discomfort I am put in,” she told the younger princess boldly.

Lassie curled up by her master's bedside, eyes looking to and fro with a saddened look, a whimpered whine leaving the confines of her mouth. Twilight laid close to Celestia in an attempt to comfort her. “I won't let you do this alone princess. He's my student as well,” said the much younger princess as she hunkered down for the night.

Celestia lay awake for several more hours, even after the others had all fallen asleep. Twilight rolled about in her sleep, even snoring slightly at one point. Celestia smiled as she nuzzled her muzzle affectionately against Twilight's cheek for just a moment before resting her head across her own forelegs. “Thank you Twilight Sparkle... you are a good friend...”

* * *

A heavy Russian IS-2 tank rammed through a blockade in the streets of Berlin. On the side of the tank in big white letters read 'Stalin's Sword' for all to see. On the top of the tank's turret resided a heavy .50 caliber Russian machine gun, operated by a middle aged man.

He swung the big gun towards a group of resistance fighters and lit them up, the heavy slugs not only tearing them away, but blowing away their concrete defense. Derreck looked around and spotted a building on the left side of the street, possibly once a deli, now heavily fortified and armed to the teeth with a handful of machine guns.

Derreck peeked back down the turret hatch to his squad, now his tank crew. “The building on the left, fifty meters!” Derreck ordered over the sound of both the tank's rumbling engine and the chaos in the streets.

Viktor brought the tank to a stop as Evan lined up the shot and fired. The 122mm cannon propelled a high explosive round into the building. The explosion tore away at the fortifications and completely annihilated the group of fighters.

Viktor began to drive the tank onwards once again as Luna reloaded the main tank gun. As they came into a town intersection, a crew operating a howitzer field gun took aim upon the group's tank. The 88mm gun fired in their direction but the round simply splashed off the heavy frontal armor of the IS-2 tank.

Derreck swung his heavy machine gun at them and opened up. Even with the gun mounted to the tank turret, the heavy machine gun still rocked and shook in his arms. Massive muzzle flashes erupted out the front of the gun as it spat out death.

The heavy slugs chewed apart the howitzer crew as the tank pressed onwards without even stopping. As they moved through the streets, they met up with another group of Russian tanks. The T34 tanks came to a stop as did Derreck's tank. The lead commander of the T34s opened his hatch and looked to the big man. “Sergeant, you lead the way and we'll follow! Down the street and smash what is left of the Third Reich!” the captain hollered.

Derreck gave a nod, ducked down through the tank hatch and pointed to Viktor which way to go. The younger man nodded and began treading the tank down the street, the group of T34 tanks flanking the heavier battle horse.

As they moved along, several soldiers scampered through the streets, firing uselessly at the tanks with their rifles and submachine guns. With his heavy machine gun at hand, Derreck made mincemeat of the soldiers.

As the tanks plundered through the streets nearly unopposed, the German soldiers ahead rallied together with an armament of anti-tank launchers. As the tanks geared down the streets, the Germans ambushed the armored group.

Anti-tank shots whooshed through the streets, erupting all around the tanks and some even scoring lucky shots. Though once a powerful army, the Nazis had been reduced to a handful of SS stragglers and conscripted recruits who were untrained with such weaponry.

A stray shot landed square in the side of the lead tank commander's T34, erupting the insides into a fiery crimson. All the tanks swiveled their secondary armament of machine guns to the ambushing Germans and lit them up.

Empty brass littered the streets as the surroundings were covered in dead bodies and blood. The captain screamed and hollered in complete agony as he dragged his flaming body out the top hatch of his tank.

Derreck turned to see the commander fall down the sides of his burning tank, squirming and frolicking on the ground as his body burned. Drawing out Alexei's pistol, Derreck racked the brightly shined slide and put a mercy round through the commander's skull. Over the years Derreck had treasured not only his rifle but Alexei's pistol as well, going so far as to even polish it and replace the regular grips with ivory ones, along with having the Soviet symbol engraved into the grips. It was truly one of a kind now.

Turning to the others tanks, he noticed two more were out of commission, leaving him with only a handful. He waved the other tanks on to follow him as he ordered Viktor to push forwards.

Luna watched the violence unfold, however, unlike years ago she had now aged and fully accepted her role as a soldier in the Red Army, namely taking on her title as 'The Blue Death'. Evan fired the massive cannon into a building, breaking apart the structural integrity and bringing the home collapsing down upon the fighting occupants.

As the tank group entered another street, they met up with a group of infantry. Derreck waved for the others to halt and turned to a soldier who rushed up to them. Derreck looked to the corporal and spoke to him. “Where is you commanding officer?” he asked but the man gave him an answer he wasn't fully expecting, yet at the same time one that didn't really surprise him either.

“They're dead sir. I am the ranking soldier,” the corporal replied. Derreck sighed.

“Well... I'm not a sir, corporal, but have your men flank behind our tanks. Keep us covered from anti-tank crews and we'll spearhead the advance towards the Reichstag!” Derreck ordered, being the ranking soldier for the time at hand.

Chaos all over the city ensued. Battalions of Red Army soldiers and tanks flushed the streets of Berlin.

As Derreck led the massive group of tanks and soldiers through the streets, he found himself mostly unopposed. Derreck held up his fist and yelled out for the formation to halt. The hairs on the back of his neck prickled up. He knew from experience to trust his instincts. He didn't know exactly but he knew something was horribly wrong.

Suddenly, without much warning, a secluded gunshot went off. A sniper's shot plowed into Derreck's right shoulder. The man roared in pain as infantry behind the tanks flinched and ducked low.

“The building on the right! Flush that coward out!” Derreck ordered to the infantry. The foot soldiers all converged to the building but no sooner had they done so, a swarm of German soldiers flushed out onto the street, along with a heavy Tiger tank that had been customly outfitted with heavy plates of armor that were welded onto the sides and front.

“TIGER!” Derreck yelled out, pointing towards the fearsome German heavyweight. He pointed to the left side. “Tanks, flank it from the left. Viktor, combat maneuvers!” Derreck shouted over the sounds of erupting gunfire.

Derreck grasped the grips of the DShK heavy machine gun and chugged heavy slugs down range at the German infantry. The shocking recoil made the big man grimace as his shoulder wound flared in pain.

In moments, the ammunition belt was depleted. “Ammo!” Derreck yelled to Luna, who handed him another belt of cartridges for the gun. The Tiger tank swung it's sights to Stalin's Sword and fired. The 88mm shot splashed against the tank and shook it, but still the IS-2 pressed onwards as the T34 tanks flanked around.

Soviet infantry duked it out with the resisting German forces in the floors of the building, the sniper pecking off shots from above. Realizing the threat of the T34 tanks, the Tiger swung it's turret towards the group and fired madly.

An eruption cratered the side of a T34, killing the crew inside and rendering the tank inoperable. Evan lined up a shot and fired, hammering the Tiger in its side armor. However, despite the successful hit the custom plates that had been welded on held up against the high explosive round and the inside crew were protected and unharmed. The group of T34 tanks fired wildly, slamming shot after shot into the heavyweight custom tank.

The German tank fired back, swatting the T34 like flies as it began to retreat. Luna loaded another high explosive shell and hollered to Evan. “SHOOT THE TRACKS!” she ordered him. Evan did as the former princess ordered and fired a high explosive round directly into the enemy tank's tracks. The eruption blew apart the tracks and the cogwheels, immobilizing the beast.

With the tank barely able to move, the relenting pounding of both the T34s and the IS-2 finally took it's toll. Soviet soldiers took the building, taking the sniper alive and tossing him from the roof. Down below, the Tiger tank fumed out a puff of black smoke and became still.

Knowing full well the crew was very well alive, Derreck gave some hand gestures to the soldiers above who in turn tossed flaming bottles of cocktail onto the tank. In seconds the custom tank was engulfed in flames. Soon after, German soldiers emerged from the tank, encased in flames and screaming in pure agony.

Derreck watch briefly in horror as did Luna. The soldiers above cheered with victory. “Luna...” Derreck called and she nodded, not needing to be told. Derreck racked the slide on Alexei's pistol while Luna emerged from a front hatch with a loaded Russian submachine gun.

The duo sprayed down merciful death upon the burning Germans. In seconds it was over and the other soldiers looked to the commanding senior sergeant who spoke. “We do not have time for these games. We have a war to win!” Derreck ordered.

The foot soldiers made their way down to the ground floor and followed the tanks into battle once again. Hours passed by as the group brutally fought their way through the streets of Berlin, linking up with other tank groups and infantry platoons and making their way to the Reichstag.

Derreck led his group, now looking more like a company, right to the the front of the battle. The tanks geared down to a halt as they were faced with the impossible task of crossing a moat that surrounded the massive building.

An older man in finer officer uniform strode over to meet the formation. The man looked around then to Derreck. “Where is your commanding officer?” he demanded and Derreck looked to him.

“It appears... we do not have one. I am the ranking soldier,” he informed the senior officer who looked to the sizable force Derreck had brought to the front. The older man rubbed his chin and turned to see the Riechstag in the not too far out distance.

“The Germans have collapsed the tunnel system below and the water has overflowed into the moat you see before you... cowards. Your tanks cannot cross, you must disembark and go on by foot. Take your formation around to the west side and flank them from there. I'll have my main battalion strike them from the front and gain their attention,” he ordered.

Derreck blinked. “Sir?” he asked, not having a suitable rank to lead such a large force.

“Sergeant, we do not have time for formalities. It could take me days to find a suitable lieutenant to lead your force. You led them here, certainly you can lead them to victory in the Reichstag?” he asked, though rather rhetorically. Derreck nodded.

“Of course.” He disembarked his tank, along with his crew. Derreck had begun to look considerably aged compared to his appearance years ago. His facial features seemed more defined then ever before, along with the now deep facial scars he received from protecting his friends in battle. His trench coat draped nearly down to his knees and fluttered about as he hopped down from the turret of the IS-2 tank.

Viktor and Evan emerged from the tank, also looking far different then before. Though, aside from stressful aging, they did not have deep war scars like Derreck had. Luna emerged last, stepping down, a trench coat darker than even Derreck's concealing most of her body.

Her fur had darkened to the point it was nearly black, and her mane had taken a dark transparent look. Her eyes burned with memories of brutality and death, some of it her own doing. Derreck rallied up the massive force he had assembled and laid down their attack strategy.

He slung his treasured rifle across his back, dubbed 'Trillium', and grabbed a rapid fire submachine gun from a pile of weaponry nearby, prompting Luna and Viktor to do the same. Evan stayed true with his ever aging SVT-40 that he had kept since the beginning of the war.

The group moved to the western flank of the targeted building. Derreck stopped just before giving word to engage the enemy. He stood up on a pile of rubble to address his company. “Men... women... comrades, my friends... I have seen the worst parts of the war... as many of you have undoubtedly seen. I remember, years ago... when the Germans had the audacity to plunder into our glorious mother land and terrorize our fellow comrades... our friends... and our families. They tried to carve up our nation for their own uses. But now! The tables have turned. We have beaten back the fascist dogs, all the way to their last defensible city that now lies in ruins yet they still persist to fight, persist to try and hold us back... persist even in their dying moments to hold onto the glory they never had. Now, finally, it is time to crush what little hope they have left and rise our glorious flag over their city for all to see. The world will know it was the mother land that brought Berlin to it's knees. Now! ONWARD! HOORAH!” He roared, echoed by the chorus of his company.

His soldiers all charged fearlessly into battle, crossing the moat and charging head on into the last defensible lines the Germans had. The sounds of gunfire filled the air, along with the barbaric roars of Soviet soldiers as they bashed through the Germans.

Derreck motioned to his original squad to follow him. A trench lay ahead, guarded by a group of soldiers manning several MG42s that sprayed down death upon incoming soldiers. Luna's face furrowed in anger as she witnessed her fellow men dying before her. Her horn flared up as her anger boiled over. The machine guns were yanked from their former owners and turned on them, shredding the resistance fighters to bloody pieces.

The squad leapt into the trench, Viktor and Luna clearing out the remaining soldiers with their submachine guns as Derreck and Evan set up their rifles and began to pick off soldiers from afar while Derreck's company continued to push forwards.

Evan leveled the iron sights on soldier after soldier, taking them out with a quick and successful shot. Derreck on the other hand used the dark finished Mosin sniper rifle to slowly pick off soldiers at an even further distance, even taking out riflemen perched atop the Reichstag building.

Having completed clearing the trench, Viktor and Luna returned to the sides of Derreck and Evan who continued to dispatch enemy after enemy. “Eighteen,” Derreck commented in competition with the younger man. Evan smirked and gave him the middle finger.

The battle to the south erupted in mass explosions as the senior officer Derreck had met kept true to his word and launched a massive offensive with his battalion. Even more fighting erupted to the north and east but Derreck made no mind of it. He wanted his group to be the first in the building.

Slinging his rifle across his back, he once again retrieved his submachine gun and led his squad forwards. The battle raged on for hours, many men perishing in the conflict. Derreck hunkered down in a small bombed out building with his three friends, looking to them all and smiling. “It has been some time... since the beginning,” he commented and Viktor nodded, recalling when they all first formally met.

All those years ago back in Poland. Viktor spoke up with a faint smile. “It seems as though it was just yesterday,” he said. Derreck fitted the black ushanka on his head and straightened it out.

They had all been through so much and it really showed. Viktor smiled as he looked to the Reichstag building. “When this is all over... drinks are on me,” he said and Derreck laughed as he nudged into him.

“Don't you mean drinks are on the Germans?” he laughed. Luna peered out to the battlefield which was still erupting in close quarters fighting. Sitting back down, she leaned into Derreck, resting her head on his shoulder.

“I just want this all to be over,” she whispered. The others all nodded as they took a moment to rest. Luna rested against Derreck, the sounds of the gun fighting drowned out by his relaxing heartbeat. Nothing else really mattered at this point, just as long as she was close to him. As long as she was with him, she felt safe. Her eyes drifted off as she caught some shut eye.

Viktor and Derreck watched the outside events play out as Evan cleaned his rifle. German fighters and Soviet soldiers exchanged heavy fire with one another. Time passed by before Derreck made note that they should get to it again. Checking his submachine gun and rifle, Derreck looked to the others.

“Well, the war isn't going to end if we just sit around napping.” He stood up, helping Luna to her hooves. The mare looked into his deep dark eyes and smiled as they paused for a moment while making eye contact.

The group moved out, once again joining their comrades in arms as they fought towards an entrance of the the Reichstag building.

Gunshots chattered and drowned out nearly every other sound except that of cannon fire. Bullets whizzed through the air, some hitting their intended targets while others just being stray shots that hit with blind luck. Derreck's assault force began to wean and thin out, the prolonged battle starting to take it's toll.

Just as thoughts of uncertainty began to arise, a new combat force came up from behind. A captain rushed up to speak with Derreck. “Senior Sergeant Parker!” he yelled and Derreck nodded. “Commissar Fedrov ordered me to assist you with the western flank and abide to your orders,” he informed Derreck who cocked a brow. This was highly unheard of but he wasn't going to argue about formalities at a time like this.

“Captain, take your men to the left side of the entrance, I'll take mine to the right. We'll strike together!” Derreck ordered and the captain nodded and whistled to his men.

Derreck regrouped his remaining soldiers and pushed on with his plan. Both groups suffered major causalities advancing to the heavily fortified building but finally were upon the staircase. Derreck looked over to see the captain give him a nod but just as the big man went to nod back, an anti-tank launcher round struck nearby and blew the captain away. Derreck followed the dissipating trail of smoke left from the launcher round and pointed to the window it had come from.

“BLOW AWAY THAT FACIST PIG!” Derreck roared. Viktor grabbed a fallen soldier's anti-tank launcher and fired it. The explosive head erupted near the window and blew out part of the wall, killing the culprit.

Viktor dropped the foreign launcher and once again wielded his Russian PPsH-41. Leading the charge, Viktor rushed forwards, gun rattling in his hands as he cut down several enemy soldiers.

Derreck led his squad up the stairs, falling slightly behind the courageous soldier. Several soldiers stepped out from behind massive pillars and fired towards Viktor with poor accuracy. The Soviet man, aged with heavy combat experience, held the chattering subgun at hip level and fired with sub-par accuracy that was still enough to chop down the enemy soldiers.

Suddenly Viktor's gun went dry. Just as he went to reload the weapon, a veteran elite SS soldier spun out from behind a barricade with a Sturmgewehr 44. With a short burst, he riddle Viktor's body with bullets, blood spurting out the man's back from exit wounds. Viktor gasped, looking in disbelief to the SS soldier.

Derreck's eyes went wide as he witnessed one of his oldest comrades get mowed down. The SS soldier fired another quick burst, all shots connecting. Empty brass spat out the ejection port as muzzle flashes burst from the end of the gun. Another burst...

Viktor gasped in shock as his weapon fell from his hands. Derreck's mind flashed a memory of Alexei, the former leader of the group taking Viktor's place in his flashback. As the SS fired again, it sounded like the plane's machine gun's in Derreck's mind.

Viktor fell to his knees, blood oozing from his chest from several fatal wounds. Holding his PPsH-41 across his chest in his left hand, Derreck drew Alexei's Tokarev pistol with his right, peppering the elite SS soldier with the treasured pistol. The gleaming pistol racked in his big hands, shot after shot driving into the enemy.

As Soviet soldiers charged past, Derreck and the others rushed to Viktor's side as he coughed up blood. “Ser... Sergeant...” he coughed.

“Viktor... relax... try to breathe,” he ordered. Viktor's breath was raspy and he wheezed as he tried to catch his breath, bullets having perforated his lungs.

“Ser... Sergeant... raise the flag... raise the...” he trailed off in his dying words and coughed, blood splattering into Derreck's face. The man went limp in Derreck's arms, who set him down and closed the man's dead eyes in a form of respect. Reaching into the man's coat, Derreck retrieved a journal, hoping it could perhaps lead him to a family he could give the bad news to once the war was done.

With that taken care of, the trio rushed into the building...

* * *

'It has been so long since Poland, when we all met. The man known as Derreck has led us through battle after battle. I undoubtedly owe the man my life yet... I am so terrified of him. His very presence is unsettling. I know for a fact his allegiance and loyalties lies with his country and with us yet when he is angry... I swear I can see the purest of evils in his eyes, a deep burning hatred that cannot be doused except by the blood of his enemies. The man refuses to die. I have seen him riddled... hosed down by dozens of bullets at a time yet stand right back up and continue to fight. Perhaps it is his loyalty to his country that keeps him going or perhaps... something else.

The one named Evan... I do not know what to say. In all these years I have never once heard him speak so much as a syllable, not even a grunt. His courage and valor on the battlefield is without question, and he is a deadly shot. He is not as savage as Derreck but I have seen him brutally beat a man to death before, on more than one occasion. Yet, at other times I have seen him share what little food he has with others. He is so soft spoken that I have even seen him share his food with the wild animals in the forests... I cannot understand this man, no matter how hard I think about it. How could someone so vicious in combat just turn around and care for things as simple as wild animals?

Luna... she is so strange. When I first saw her I thought it was a horrible joke. That someone had painted a neighbor's horse blue. But I found out quickly that was not the case. Our leader, Stalin, had created something far beyond our time. Somehow he had managed to make a horse talk, and then decided to put it to war. It was strange though... the horse... Luna, refused to fight, even going so far as to not even hold a rifle for the longest time. In the end though, she ended up saving our lives on many occasions. It becomes even stranger as her fur begins to... change colors as she kills more often, now not even hesitating to pull the trigger of her rifle. However, despite this, she is still kind at heart. I have seen her show mercy to even her most brutal foes. Even so... I can see it in her eyes. She was not meant for this. She feels a traumatizing guilt that resides inside of her and eats away at her soul.

Why must there be war? Why must we be forced to kill each other? It seems that war has a more serious effect on the innocent, the kind, the generous... the loving. It hurts me every time I have to see Luna's eyes, deeply saddened with what she has had to do...'

* * *

Derreck and his two remaining friends rushed gallantly into battle alongside their fellow soldiers. Remaining elite guards fought erratically to try and hold back the onslaught but their defenses did not hold long.

Evan rushed forwards, firing rapidly with his SVT-40. As the rifle went dry, he jabbed the bayonet into the chest of an enemy soldier before hunkering down to reload.

Derreck charged up his flank, eliminating enemy soldiers with his rattling subgun. Luna followed in close pursuit, grasping her own chattering instrument of death within her magical aura.

The remaining resistance soldiers had built up makeshift wooden barricades. Derreck waved over to incoming Russian troops. “Blow those barricades to the ground!” He shouted. Several men tossed hand grenades at the makeshift defenses. The explosions chipped away at the structure but at first were not enough to take it down. Another volley of grenades ripped away at the supporting beams and the barricades came crashing down upon the fighting German soldiers.

The trio moved onwards along with another group of soldiers, fighting through corridors, hallways and even a large stage room. Gunfire and screaming echoed in the building, some fighting occurring so close people were fighting hand-to-hand combat. As they moved room to room, the soldiers burned and destroyed whatever Nazi paraphernalia they found.

Derreck, Luna and Evan hunkered down, just a few dozen yards away from their target. The top balcony perch of the Reichstag building. Only a few dozen enemy soldiers remained opposing them.

Derreck waved over some ally soldiers. “We charge them, head on, don't stop!” he ordered. They all nodded. With a roaring cheer, the entire group charged, weapons firing and spitting lead death to their enemies.

Derreck and Luna charged, Evan falling slightly back as he moved at a slower pace to get aimed shots on his enemies. Time seemed to slow for Luna as all the carnage erupted around her. Blood and guts spilled the floors along with spent brass casings. Bright muzzle flashes erupted like shooting stars.

Derreck roared over the sound of his rapid submachine gun that sputtered out death to all those who opposed him. Minutes past and the room went still. Only the sounds of far off fighting inside the building still echoed.

With the major fighting and killing done, Luna dropped her still smoking, empty PPsH-41 to the floor. Exhausted, she took a deep breath. Derreck waved over a man with a flag and handed it to Luna. “To the balcony, for all to see,” he ordered her. She huffed out an exhale.

"Finally..." she whispered, nearly feeling the war coming to a close.

Luna hefted up the Soviet flag and walked it out to the balcony where several enemy soliders lay dead. As she trotted forwards she began to feel tired, the war finally catching up with her. Just as she neared the perch of the Reichstag, an enemy soldier pushed a dead body off himself, having concealed himself under the dead.

He drew a Luger pistol and fired a single shot at Luna that slammed into the broad part of her chest. She gasped and fell to her back, time itself seeming to slow. Derreck roared in absolute anger, reaching a plateau he had never been to before.

His muscles quaked in anger as veins bulged from beneath his skin. The skin along his forearm rippled slightly as he rushed forwards, roaring like a wild beast. The German swung his aim to the charging man but his Luger had jammed. Just as Derreck neared, his wrist bones relocated painfully. A shrew of blood spewed from his hands as jagged bony claws erected from between his knuckles, unsheathing themselves from the confines of his body.

He swung with his right in a wide arc, slicing gashes across the soldier's chest. Starting low, Derreck swung with his left on an upwards diagonal swing, cutting open the man's guts.

With a final thrust, Derreck jabbed both sets of claws into the man's stomach and heaved him up high. Twisting his wrists, he pulled outwards with both hands, slicing the man clean in half, blood dousing his body. The two halves of the soldier's body were tossed off the balcony of the Reichstag building.

Looking back to his gravely injured friend, he rushed over. “Luna...” he whispered and the mare held a hoof to his mouth.

“Sssh... it's alright now... the war is over... this is good, isn't it?” she asked and he nodded slightly.

“One... last thing,” he said as he brought her to her hooves, supporting her weight as he grabbed the flag. Putting it in her hooves, he helped her over the the balcony perch. “The honor... shall be yours,” he told her.

She stumbled a bit but, without using her magic, rammed the Soviet flag home, displaying it for all to see. Luna was about to collapse but Derreck came to her aid, holding her up on her hind legs so she could witness the glory of their victory. A beautiful chorus seemed to play in the background.

Derreck stroked his hands through her ever darkening mane...

* * *

Burdy's perspective...

I awoke with a sudden gasp, the dream I just had fading from memory. For several moments I felt a tingling sensation over my body but it soon left. I had no recollection of where I was or how I got here...

Memories of the night before... I looked to my watch to realize it was actually Sunday. My heart sank. “Ahh shit!” I cursed silently, remembering that I was supposed to help AJ with her family matters.

I hopped off the... hospital bed? I was sleeping on a hospital bed! What happened?! I took no note of it as my feet landed only to be followed by a shocked and pained yelp.

“OW! MY TAIL!” Screamed a rather familiar voice.

I stumbled back in shock, everything being too dark to properly see. I ended up knocking over my hospital bed that crashed down rather loudly. I heard several other yelps and before I knew anything more, blindingly bright lights turned on.

I covered my eyes, my damaged eye having not been covered and fogging my perception. I heard a gasp, more like a crying report. “WHAT?! WHAT'S GOING ON?!” Gasped the sound of Luna's voice.

A second, more rejoiced voice pitched in. “SISTER! YOU'RE AWAKE! THANK THE HEAVENS!” I held my left hand over my bad eye and looked around.

“GUH! Twilight, Lassie!” I gasped, having not remembered them being present at the gala. I looked around and noticed I was in a hospital room of sorts. Luna was standing in mortified shock as her sister held her in a loving embrace.

Luna looked around then to me. “Where's Derreck?! Where are we?! How did we get here?!” she cried out and her elder sister tried to settle her.

“Relax my sister. You fell into coma and we brought you here. Everything is alright,” she mentioned but Luna would have none of it, not believing her sister.

“No... where's Derreck. We were in Germany... Berlin, the Reichstag! How did we get here?!” she yelled. Celestia instead gave a nuzzling touch to the panicking mare.

“Relax Luna, it was all just a nightmare. You're safe now,” Celestia assured her sister who still continued to panic and looked to me.

“Evan... where's Derreck, how'd we get here?!” she gasped and I shrugged, not really knowing what she was babbling on about.

“Uhm... ah dunno. I just woke up too,” I said and looked to Lassie. “Sorry for stepping on your tail,” I apologized and Lassie just huffed.

Celestia turned to Twilight and I. “She may need some time to settle. You are all free to go. As I understand Applejack has some... family matters to attend to,” she made mention and the three of us left.

Twilight turned to me as we walked down the hallways. “What happened? I've never seen Luna in such a panic before,” Twilight asked and I just shrugged.

“Ah dunno. Truth be told I'm a little freaked out too... it's Sunday... I thought yesterday was Friday. I was just at the-” Twilight cut me short.

“The two of you were comatose for over twenty-four hours. Where you dreaming at all?” Twilight asked and I thought back on it. Every time I started to remember, it got all hazy. I just shrugged.

“I think so, but I can't remember it all that well,” I replied. She stopped and hopped to her hindlegs, stroking my cheek affectionately. She had a gentle and heartwarming look about her.

"You look better this way," she commented and I rose a brow.

"Why? Did I look different?" I asked in confusion but she didn't answer...

* * *

Third person,

Sometime later...

Celestia spoke to her sister. “Luna, believe me when I say it was all just a dream.”

Luna shouted back to her sister. “It can't have been a dream! It isn't possible! I fought... I bled... I killed... it happened and I witnessed it all!” she began to weep. Celestia tried to comfort her sister, also taking note her sister was using singular text as opposed to referring to herself as 'us' or 'we'.

“Luna... I'm sorry for having asked you to do this.” She turned her head away in shame. “But... what about Derreck? What did you learn about him?” she asked, prying into the subject.

“He is a hero. He saved me... many times,” she commented.

Celestia shook her head. “Sister... he is not real. It never happened,” she tried to tell her sister.

Luna gave her a fiery gaze. “HE IS REAL! He saved my life. We fought and bled alongside each other from the very beginning. From Poland, to Stalingrad, to Leningrad, Kursk, Minsk... Seelow Heights and even into Berlin!” she howled, slamming the door in her sister's face before crying into her pillow...

Chapter 50

'Memories relived...'

Burdy's perspective...

We all made our way out the front of the castle, save for Celestia who was tending to her sister's breakdown.

As I stepped out into the sunlight, I noticed something I wasn't fully sure how to take. “Cadance?” I asked curiously. Lassie chuckled.

“Somepony... left me behind,” my canine companion mentioned, nudging into Twilight who just blushed nervously. AJ spoke up and broke my thoughts.

“Hate tah mention it, but we all gotta hurry tah the station. Err, at least ah gotta. Gots tah catch the next train tah Appleloosa tah meet up with muh folks... speakin' a which, yah still comin'?” she asked me and I nodded before rubbing my chin.

“Well... I mean, I'd hate to split up the crew but... AJ, me and you could take my truck to Apple-wherever... I mean, it'd probably be faster... if that's okay with everyone else?” I asked, turning to the others. Dash just laughed.

“Break up the group? Sorry but Pinkie already beat you to that one,” she said, pointing down the streets were Pinkie bounced along energetically, picking up various treats from different stores faster than the laws of physics should allow.

“Oh... uhm... okay. Lassie, you coming with?” I asked, whom shot me a stupidified look.

“You mean to say: Hey Lassie, wanna come along, shovel manure, carry around loads of apples and perform other back breaking tasks? Yeaaaaaah... no. I'll pass,” she replied and I just rolled my eye with a laugh, kneeling down to give her a good rub to the head. “Okay. Then keep the library in order, okay?” I asked, trying my best to give a wink to my mom.

Lassie chuckled. “I'll make sure to keep your bed warm for you too,” she joked. I nodded and with that stood up and gave my farewells to the group before heading off with AJ. I keyed the truck and started her up without my 'naughty' play.

As the truck rumbled to life, AJ began a subject Twilight had brought up earlier. “Yah feelin' alright?” she asked and I nodded. “Like... hundred percent?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Close to it,” I replied. She took a closer look at me as we puttered through the streets at a cautious pace.

“Yah had some pretty gruesome scars on yer face when yah was sleeping,” she commented and I shrugged with an 'ah dunno' look.

“All I know is... okay, you're gonna hate it but we gotta stop by Flim and Flam's,” I mentioned and she groaned. “Don't worry. You don't gotta even get out of the truck. Just gotta talk to them and get some extra fuel for the trip,” I informed her...

Sometime later...

The truck came to a stop by Flim and Flam's warehouse, dust fuming up as we came to a stop. They were usually at their garage in the desert but I told Applejack we had to see them just in case they were here. The big Texas Longhorn bull horns protruded off the hood like a testament of terror. The engine kept rumbling as I stepped out, my wook boots setting down onto the ground.

We had stopped by the library briefly so I could pick up some clothes, namely my duster coat and my now black trousers along with some other things for the week ahead. I whistled and called out for the brothers.

“YO! Flim, Flam!” I paused for a moment, not getting a response. “Huh...” I looked to AJ who sat in the truck. “Guess they're not home,” I told her. I needed to not only fill up but get extra fuel for the ride, meaning I'd need some kinda jerrycan.

I went to apporach the warehouse but a shiver went down my spine as I remembered the last time I was here. “Rats...” I grumbled as I went to the toolboxes and fished out Applebloom, my SKS rifle.

'Heh... Applejack's younger sister is named Applebloom,' I thought to myself and looked to the rifle. The two had nothing in common, or nothing to my knowledge. I fed ten rounds into the rifle's magazine before approaching the warehouse. Applejack knocked on the window as I passed by. I opened the door briefly to address her.

“Just stay here. I don't think anything's wrong but... just in case, stay in the truck,” I told her as I shut the door once more. I walked into the building and spotted dried blood from my confrontation here, but no bodies. They had either made off with their tails between their legs or... were dragged off by predators while unconscious... that'd be a helluva way to go.

After a quick scan of the area and finding nothing suspicious, I inspected a few fuel canisters and grabbed four of the best looking twenty liter cans. I carried them out and made quick work to fill them up, setting them in the back and scrunching my nose as I realized I had no way to fasten them down.

With a roll of my eye, I quickly shut off my truck before starting to fill both tanks of the vehicle. I'd hate to run dry out in the desert planes somewhere. I didn't even know how far this place was. Hell, it could be across Equestria for all I knew.

After filling the truck and hanging up the pump, I unloaded my rifle of ammunition and set her back in her case in the toolbox before heading to the little station booth. “Just gotta write the F brothers a note,” I said with a nod to AJ who still sat impatiently in the truck.

I guess I can feel where she comes from. If some guys tried to swindle my family's lot from us I'd be a little T'd off too. I walked into the booth and grabbed a notepad and pencil, scribbling down a note to the brothers that I had been here and was in Appleloosa for a while before I'd return to Ponyville.

Just as I went to leave, my stomach grumbled and my nose caught wind of food, although faint. I looked to the desk and spotted a stale, probably outdated, chocolate doughnut. “Oh hey, yum. I ain't eatin' in... a while,” I said, making note I had been out for over twenty-four hours. I grabbed the doughnut and took a chomp, immediately gagging at the rather nasty taste. “Blah... gross,” I grunted in a gruffy tone. Quickly coming to thought I was rather hungry, I remembered something gravely important. I had Twinkies in the back of my truck.

“OH BABY YEAH!” I shouted as I tossed what was left of the horrid doughnut aside, rushing back to my truck. I hopped into the driver seat but didn't even shut the door as I began fishing through the back seat.

“What are yah doin'?” AJ asked curiously, but was quickly answered as I pulled out a box of my delicious morsels.

“Super food. Will never go bad. Stuffed with so much preservatives it'll probably kill you before giving you any nutritional benefits... my favorite,” I told her as I shut my truck door and started the truck, the box of Twinkies resting on my lap.

“Oh man...” I trailed off, using one hand to steer the truck as we pulled away and using the other to rip open the Twinkies box. “Ah ain't had one a these since... probably since I met your sister all those months back when I gave her a ride to school on that rainy day...” I said, putting one of the yellow bars in my mouth and downing it quickly.

There would be no way these things could tide over my hunger but oh god they tasted so good. I looked to AJ and offered her one. “No thanks. Got muh stuff packed in the back,” she said, reminding me that we had picked up a few things from her place before coming out here. I didn't quite know what they were but thinking on it now, I hopped she was a smarter traveler than me and packed some proper food.

The truck picked up speed on a trail not far from the railroad tracks as we booted along towards where Appleloosa was supposed to be, according to AJ. Not long into the ride, I had the window down, arm on the windowsill, cowboy hat on and sunglasses covering part of my face. We had stopped by my house briefly so I could change out of my suit and into something more... work appropriate. I had my duster coat and a couple extra pairs of pants, underwear and socks... to bad I hadn't thought of food for the trip.

I tipped my cowboy hat just a little, so the brim blocked out the sun's glare. 'Struttin' yer shit?' my conscious asked and I nodded.

'Like always,' I replied back. I looked to AJ, my only companion for the trip. “So... AJ...” I tried to bring up conversation. She looked to me but remained silent for the most part. “Uhm... your family... what are they like?” I asked. She blinked, twitched her lip then spoke.

“All different ah suppose. Were all apple farmers, the most of us anyways. Ah dunno, what dah yah wanna know?” she asked and I shrugged. “Well... iffen yah wanna know it all... that's a loooong story,” she mentioned and I smirked.

“It's one looooong ride,” I replied back with a smile, not looking directly to her but smiling in her direction.

“Well sugarcube, ah'll warn yah... might not be as excitin' and thrillin' as yah hope,” she mentioned with a slight smile. I grinned.

“Aww, come on AJ. Ah'm sucker fer small talk. Lay it on me...”

* * *

Third person,

Ponyville...

Lassie mingled along slightly ahead of Twilight, Spike and Owlowiscious as they arrived home at the library. She swung the door open but her mouth went agape as the group was met by a terrible mess.

Things lay on the floor in disarray, some bookshelves were knocked over, mucky water along with dozens of dirty bath towels resided on the floor...

Lassie groaned. “Uhhh... heh-heh... guess my crew... encountered technical difficulties beyond their control,” she chuckled nervously as the three fillies came into view dressed in cooking aprons.

At this point Lassie took note that there was a bit of smoke coming from the kitchen, along with the stench of something burning. She, along with Twilight, rushed into the kitchen to be greeted by the sight of a large frying pan that had something burning on it, most likely cooking oil.

“GAH CRAP!” Lassie swore as she grabbed a pair of oven mitts, retrieved the burning pan and rushed it outside where she proceeded to toss it into the street, the still flaming pan scaring away several ponies.

Quickly retrieving the chemical fire extinguisher, Lassie made quick work of the still blazing pan. In seconds the fire was out. Lassie looked at the mess on the ground and sighed to herself. “Dammit... I liked that pan.”

She wandered back inside, setting the spent extinguisher aside as she and Twilight began opening windows, Spike and the three fillies blinking in shock. After all was accounted for, Lassie looked to the group of fillies. “Okay minions... as of this time I have no further use for you. Depart,” she told them with a chuckle.

The three fillies left and Lassie dipped her head with a sigh. “I know... I'll clean it up,” she groaned. Twilight spoke up.

“Lassie, what would have happened if we hadn't showed up when we did?” she asked in a somewhat annoyed voice. Lassie shrugged and looked back to her with an equally annoyed look.

“Ah dunno. What woulda happened if you had've taken me along with you instead of leaving me behind?!” she snapped. Twilight blinked.

“Well... I... I uhh... I told you to stay here...” she bit her lip then dropped her head in defeat. “Alright... I know. I shouldn't have left you behind. But you also shouldn't have tasked the library to a group of fillies, Lassie,” Twilight mentioned and Lassie rolled her eyes.

“It was either them, that wannabee dentist, that green mare and her friend Bondo-” Twilight cut her off.

“It's Bon Bon,” she interjected and Lassie rolled her eyes.

“Like I was saying, them or... all your friends' pets... I think I made the smart decision,” she mentioned and Twilight just groaned as they began cleaning the place up. Hours past and the group finally had the place looking like it was before, now even having a glistening tone to it.

Twilight stepped up beside Lassie and spoke an apology. “I'm sorry for leaving you behind. I guess he's your friend as much as he is mine-” but Lassie cut her short.

“Nah... he's not my friend. He's family. I mean, come on, let's face it... we're all a little bit more than just friends here,” she said and Twilight groaned.

“Oh goddess please don't tell me you're going to start thinking I'm your mother too,” she commented and Lassie groaned as she dipped her face into her front paws.

“Oh god... for an intelligent princess you are sooOOOooo dumb,” Lassie mentioned, perking Twilight's attention. Lassie pawed her owned face, rubbing her snout irritably. “You still haven't found out? Haven't you asked him about it?” she asked but Twilight shook her head. Mumbling to herself, Lassie groaned inwardly. “You're as much to blame as he is.”

Twilight didn't hear the last part and spoke up. “I tried... several times. But he... well he starts to break down and I don't want to lose him,” she replied and Lassie sighed as she waved the princess towards the basement.

“Follow me... minion,” Lassie motioned, 'Yah dunce,' she didn't add in. They walked down to Evan's room, formerly Twilight's laboratory. Lassie began to rummage through Evan's things.

“Uhm... Lassie, maybe we shouldn't go through his personal belongings-” Lassie cut her short.

“Sssh, he wouldn't mind. Besides... I guess I kinda forced you into this prematurely,” she mentioned, perking one of Twilight's brows. “Remember Mother's Day?” she asked and Twilight nodded.

“Of course. How could I forget our first time together?” she replied and Lassie groaned.

“Hopeless romantic... ahem, anyway, remember how I kinda... foolishly... forced you into it,” she replied and Twilight didn't answer immediately.

“Well... you were just joking about what you'd do though,” she stated and Lassie groaned.

“Yeah but... ugh, I was so stupid. It kinda drove me insane how you'd bring up the topic then just drop it... so, I dunno, I was young, horny and stupid-” she cut herself short as she pulled out an envelope. “AH-HA! HERE IT IS!” She announced, opening up the envelope. Twilight walked up to Lassie's side and took a look. Lassie fumbled out several photographs and handed them to the princess. “Take a look,” she offered.

Twilight took grasp of the photos in her magical aura and began sorting through them. Photo after photo had pictures of what she presumed to be his family, some including him and some not.

Lassie stopped her at one photo where there was a young child giggling as a dog licked his face. “That one's my favorite. That was him a decade ago with his dog Ally,” she said and Twilight looked to her.

“How do you know that?” she asked and Lassie rolled her eyes.

“Because he's showed me these and told me the history behind each one,” she replied. Twilight was about to ask but Lassie intervened. “He never showed you because... well, he's probably scared. On the flip side, I'm his dog... you know the old saying: 'Man's best friend'?” Lassie asked but Twilight shook her head, having never heard that phrase before. Rarity had once said a gem is a mare's best friend though Twilight begged to differ.

Lassie broke Twilight's train of thought. “Listen... I'm not gonna tell you his entire story cause... it's his life and it's his privacy but... seeing as he's... well anyway, and you're too shy and scared to bring it up... what do you notice about those photos?” she asked.

Twilight sifted through the photos but came up with nothing. “I don't know... what's the secret?” Twilight asked.

“Find one with his mother,” the dog replied. Twilight quickly sorted through the photos and found one with Evan sitting beside an older, larger, looking woman and showed it to Lassie.

“Figured you'd do that. See, that's not his mother. That's his grandmother...” Lassie trailed off. Twilight sorted through the photos trying to find a picture of Evan's mother but came up with nothing, only finding more of his grandmother, male relatives and some more with his dog.

“I... well...” Twilight mumbled as she again went over the photos. After a few minutes past, Lassie put her paw over top of the photos, making sure not to scratch them.

“It's no use. You won't find one,” she commented and Twilight looked to the canine.

“Why not?” she asked and Lassie shrugged.

“Well... see... Evan's mom was hardly around in his childhood, and when she was around she wasn't... well let's just say his real mother undoubtedly loved him... she probably just didn't show it very well,” she commented and Twilight stood in silence. “You see... ever since before he can remember, his grandmother raised him. Even though he had people who loved him, he strived to impress his mother... probably figuring that was the way to have her love him...” Lassie began to sort through his things but after a few moments, swore to herself.

“Shit... they're Cadance's glove box... rats. You know those medals he has. The ones from school?” she asked and Twilight nodded.

“Of course! The ones he received for academic achievements. When he told me I wasn't readily sure but when he showed me it was unbelievable. He had the highest grades of anyone else in two of his courses along with honor role statistics... I'm so proud of him. He really is a gifted student, even if he won't admit it,” she appraised the man and Lassie nodded.

“See that... right there...” Lassie mentioned and Twilight blinked, unsure of what she had meant. “You probably said the same thing when he told you and showed you the medals and awards, right?” Twilight nodded. “Yeah, well that's more appraise than his mother ever showed him his whole life.”

Twilight's expression went a little sour. “Well that's not very nice of-” but Lassie cut her short as she rummaged through his belongings and pulled out a muscle magazine, the cover having an intensely large man on it with a beat red face while he lifted weights.

“That's him,” Lassie said as she handed the princess the magazine.

“That's!... That's not Evan,” she commented and Lassie groaned.

“Sorry, got ahead of myself. You know that dumb accent and those crappy puns Evan's always using?” she asked and Twilight nodded, remembering his somewhat goofy shenanigans and that ridiculous accent and those equally silly puns. “Yeah well that's the guy that originally used them. Arnold Schwarzenegger.”

Twilight flipped through the magazine. Most of it was advertising for muscle protein shakes or workout routines, fitness gyms and the like. “Sometime if you want you can read the article about that guy. It's somewhere in the middle of the magazine. It goes on about that guy and how his parents didn't believe in him. How he wanted to be something more. How he went from nearly nothing to a superstar... guess maybe Evan idolizes him for more than just his big muscles and shitty puns,” Lassie mentioned.

Twilight rolled up the magazine, making note to read it later as she got back on track to the subject at hand. “So about Evan's mother-” Lassie cut her short.

“No more about that. You wanna know more you're gonna have to ask him directly. Thing is... he began to forget about her but... I guess somewhere down the line he began to strive for motherly attention. At one point he even accepted a cow as his mother because she'd groom him and show him affection. A FRICKEN COW, TWILIGHT!” Lassie yelled out the last part.

Twilight blinked. “Like... he actually-” Lassie again cut her short.

“Yes. A cow. A bovine animal-” Twilight cut her short.

“But surely he-” Lassie wouldn't let her speak.

“JUST SUSH, AND LET ME SPEAK!... Haaa...” she let out a sigh. “I'm sure somewhere deep down, harbored away from his thoughts, heavily supressed... he knows that you're truly not his mother but... Twilight, you've shown him love, comfort, affection... you've given him shelter when he no other place to go. You've brought him into this world... in a way... that's what a mother is. Yeah you're a different species... yeah you're the same age, but in his mind that's irrelevant. You've shown him the motherly compassion he's strived for most of his adult life. That's why he calls you mother and considers you so.” Lassie paused for a good long while. “I don't know what to say. I'm sure that's what the princesses were trying to find out by invading his dreams... trying to find out why he considers you his mother...” Lassie trailed off and sighed before smirking.

“What's so funny?” Twilight asked in a serious tone.

“Well... heh-heh... I've never had a father. I mean, yeah, I'd have to cum from something but... I mean... he's raised me since before I can remember...” Lassie trailed off.

“Oh please don't tell me you're going to start calling him dad,” Twilight groaned and Lassie scoffed.

“NO! I'm just saying... it's strange you know... how he'll break down like he does yet... you know, I won't. I dunno what to say Twilight. Evan's as complex as they come... heh, cum,” she chuckled and Twilight gave her a sour expression. “Hey don't look at me like that. I know you like it,” she laughed and Twilight began to trot away.

“If this is where the conversation is going, I'm leaving,” Twilight mentioned and Lassie just rolled her eyes.

“Toodles princess.” Lassie pulled out a smut magazine and took a seat as she began to read the filthy pages in peace.

* * *

Evan's perspective,

Appleloosa...

We arrived at the small town a little late in the day. I let out a chuckle. It looked more or less like something from a stereotypical wild west flick. “So...” I trailed off and looked to Applejack. “Where to now?” I asked curiously.

She rubbed her chin. “Well... ah did say ah'd meet 'em at the station but... ah think we're a bit early.” She looked around and fiddled with the window switch. I had shown her how to use the electric windows but she wasn't exactly good at operating anything in the vehicle thus far.

I used the driver side master controls to roll the window down for her. “Thanks,” she mentioned as she looked out to the town which was still bustling. We got several stares, no doubt because of Cadance.

I took my hat off for a moment and used it like a fan. Before I could speak, Applejack shouted out. “COUSIN BRAEBURN!” She yelled, squirming out the window and rushing out to a stallion in western garb... come to think of it, everypony in town, myself included, was wearing western wear.

The two embraced in a loving hug before conversating about something. Applejack pointed over to the truck and I figured that was my cue. I shut Cadance down as Applejack and her cousin approached.

Setting my aging cowboy hat atop my head, I swung the door open and set just my left foot down, pivoting my heel in the dirt to get that action hero movie-like entrance. I stepped out of the vehicle, the cowboy hat covering most of my facial features. Braeburn hadn't quite seen me just yet, the door covering my figure.

I stepped out into view just as he was a few feet away, still conversing with AJ. My duster coat flapped a little as I gently shut the door and turned to him. “Hey there, welcome tah...” he began as his head turned to my direction, but he became silent and his expression went from a happy joyful look to one that was a bit more... of a fearful look.

Applejack, having already been accustomed to my look, introduced me. “Brae, this is Evan... err as he says, Burdy if yah fancy,” she said. I tipped up my hat with a smile.

“Howdy Brae... like she said, Burdy if yah fancy.” I offered my hand to him. “Applejack's told me a lot about you. Honor teh meet yah,” I told him. He gulped nervously as he timidly shook my hand.

“A-A-AJ told me... told me about yah too... fancy meetin' yah... sir,” he stammered and I rose a brow.

“Uhm... okay I know I tried for the classic movie styled entrance but... was it too much?” I asked, wondering just what exactly had him so frightened of me. I mean, sure I was taller than him and sure I had an imposing frame but... “Is it the hat thing? I mean, you guys have hats too so...” I trailed off and he gulped.

“I-i-it's the... the coat. Ah only see lawpony an' outlaws wearin' them an'... well... ah don't see a badge...” he trembled and I rolled my eyes as I took off the coat and tossed it into the back seat of my truck.

“Come on. You think your cousin AJ would hang around an outlaw and bring him out to your town?” I asked with a heartwarming laugh... or at least what I tried to pass off as a heartwarming laugh.

He stayed silent for a moment and AJ spoke up. “Oh come now Brae. Didn't nopony tell yah not tah judge a book by it's cover?” Applejack mentioned, only making Braeburn gulp again. “Now come on then. Show 'em the town like yah showed muh other friends. He don't bite none,” she assured him.

I brought up a topic I was hoping would ease his stress. “Oh come on. Haven't you read about me in the papers? Burdy, legendary hero who helped a sick mare climb to the top of Mount Tia so she could complete her dying wish?” I asked.

“Musta... musta missed that one,” he stuttered. I sighed with a deep exhale.

“Well... okay. We'll take it slow. Applejack convinced me to come out and give yah all a hand with chores and such. Add an extra pair of hooves... hands, to the mix. Whatta yah say...” I offered. “I won't wear the coat.”

He nodded. “Okay... well uhh...” he looked around town. “If yah follow me this way, ah'll show yah The Salt Block...”

* * *

Third person,

Ponyville...

Lassie mingled through the house, bored as ever. Only a matter of two days had passed since Evan left with Applejack to Appleloosa. The day was now Tuesday, Spike had gone out to play with Sweetie Belle and Twilight was busy with her studies, leaving her all to her lonesome.

Flipping through Evan's trench coat pockets, she retrieved a few coins before stepping out of the house and looking to the town. It was early in the morning and only a handful of ponies were out and about. Taking the handful of change with her, she proceeded to Sugarcube Corner where the ever energetic pink mare greeted her.

“HIYAH LASSIE, HOW'S IT GOING?!” She blurted out, bouncing around and getting things ready for the day.

Lassie just mumbled things to herself, now wishing she had gone along with Evan. “Ah dunno... tea an' a biscuit,” Lassie ordered but before she could turn to look, Pinkie already had the beverage and treat set out in front of her. However, much to her dismay, the biscuit was a dog treat.

Giving her a frown, Lassie spoke up again. “A regular biscuit... you know, like a tea biscuit,” Lassie muttered and Pinkie giggled.

“Whoops, ahah, silly me.” But before she said much else, she zoomed away and was back in a flash with the biscuit. “HERE YAH GO!” she chimed in her usual bubbly voice. Lassie took a sip of the hot beverage and immediately flinched, the tea a little too hot.

Giving it a gentle blow, she instead turned to her biscuit, taking a chomp out of it and sighing to herself. Pinkie spoke up. “So whatcha up to?” she asked, taking a seat across from the dog. Lassie shrugged and as she looked up, noticed everything was clean and ready for the day, a massive difference to what it had looked like just moments ago.

'Wow she's good,' Lassie thought to herself before shrugging. “Ah dunno... probably mingle around uselessly. Evan's outta town with Applejack, Spike's off with Sweetie Belle, Twilight's reading...” she complained grumpily to herself.

“Well, you wanna know what I do when I'm down with a frown?!” Pinkie asked excitedly. Lassie groaned, figuring it to be the beginning of a musical the town's ponies had a tendency of breaking into.

“No, not really,” she sighed.

“Well, when I'm down sometimes I play pranks on my friends,” she mentioned. Lassie sat there for a moment, her chin resting atop her paws currently on the tabletop. Moments past before she realized it wasn't a song, but rather just a statement.

“That's it?” Lassie asked and Pinkie rose a brow.

“What do you mean 'That's it'?” Pinkie asked with a look of confusion.

“No... break down into a musical that entices the whole town. No... pull out random things from thing air and blast confetti in every which direction... just... pranks?” Lassie asked, still not sure if this was some kinda joke.

“Do yah want me to sing you a song?! Cause I have songs for song emergen-” Lassie cut her short.

“NO! No, it's okay. No songs. Just... kinda shocked is all... so... a prank you say?”

Minutes later...

A ring at the door sprang Rarity from her perch at the sewing machine. She rushed downstairs, calling out for them to wait just a moment. As she arrived at the door however, she was only greeted by the sight of a large pink box with a big heart colored on the sides.

Rarity cocked a brow but thought nothing of it, knowing full well she'd need to get back to fulfilling orders. Levitating the box and its contents inside, she set it aside for the time being to get back to her task.

There was a long pause before the top of the box opened up. Pinkie and Lassie hopped out discreetly, stopping dead in their tracks at the sight of Opal. Luckily for them, the cat was napping peacefully.

Lassie whispered to Pinkie. “Okay... Sweetie Belle is out with Spike so there shouldn't be anypony else around... let's go.” Lassie and Pinkie crept through the house silently, cranking up the thermostat to full blast as they made their way upstairs and to the washroom.

Entering the washroom, Pinkie closed the door while Lassie removed the shower head nozzle. Pinkie looked to her, with a risen brow. As carefully as she could muster, the canine placed a few colored hard candies into the shower head and screwed it back on. Turning to the towel cupboards, she pulled out a few lint towels and placed them on the towel rack.

“Okay. Come on, this way,” Lassie ordered as they slipped out the bathroom window undetected. The crouched down and waited.

Inside Rarity continued to work as things started to heat up. She grumbled to herself, complaining that the pegasus should bring by some rain clouds every once and a while. She used one of her hooves like a fan for a brief minute before beginning to sweat.

“Hmm... I have been working all morning. Perhaps a shower is in order,” she commented. Briefly contemplating a trip to the spa, she brushed away the thought in reminder that she'd like to complete these dresses by nightfall.

Slipping into the shower, Lassie and Pinkie peeked through the window. Lassie nudged Pinkie. “This is the best part,” she commented. The duo waited for another few minutes before hearing the grumbled complaints of Rarity, commenting about how sticky she had become from sweat due to the heat.

Lassie snickered then tugged Pinkie along. “What next?” Lassie asked Pinkie, now the mare's choice for a prank.

Minutes later...

Lassie climbed up secretively to the balcony of the library and peeked into Twilight's room, where she still resided reading her study books. Looking down to Pinkie, Lassie gave a nod. The pink mare rapped on the door, gaining Twilight's attention. As soon as the alicorn princess left her domain, Lassie snuck in and taped an air horn to the bottom of Twilight's office chair.

Scampering back out the balcony doors, she made note to leave everything the way it had been, save for the new addition. She gave a nod to Pinkie who gave her goodbyes to Twilight, having just brought up a rather irrelevant topic.

With an unsure shrug Twilight proceeded back towards her room, while Pinkie also snuck up to Lassie's perch in the tree branches, just beneath the balcony but still with ample view of the princess's quarters.

As Twilight returned, she first retrieved her book before taking a seat. As her weight depressed the office chair's seat, it also set off the air horn. Twilight jumped in shock, tossing her books and notes into the air while taking flight. Her flapping wings blustered several other objects away.

Lassie and Pinkie both howled in laughter, gaining the princess's attention. Noticing they had been made, the duo zoomed off. Twilight looked under her chair and just rolled her eyes with a giggle.

The two of them proceeded on the day, playing mostly harmless pranks. As the day came to a close, Lassie got a grin on her face. “I think... I just got a wonderful idea...”

An hour later...

The duo lay in the tall grass outside Fluttershy's home. Pinkie nudged Lassie, having no idea what the canine had done. “We really shouldn't prank Fluttershy. She's too shy and timid and it might scare her,” she commented but Lassie just waved a paw.

“Wayyyy ahead a yah... trust me. It's nothing sinister... ah, perrrrrfect,” Lassie mentioned as Fluttershy returned home down her trail. Pinkie Pie nibbled her lip, contemplating whether or not she should warn her friend. For all she knew, this could be the worst prank yet. Lassie was completely unpredictable.

Pinkie Pie continued biting her lip as Fluttershy trotted ever closer to the door. “We shouldn't do this. We have to stop her. She'll take it too seriously,” Pinkie mentioned but Lassie shook her head.

“No, it's too good!” She giggled. At the last possible moment, just as Fluttershy was turning the handle to her home, Pinkie jumped up.

“FLUTTERSHY WAIT!” She called out. “IT'S A TRAP!” But it was too late. The door opened and several googly eyes looked to Fluttershy. At first she gasped but to her utter surprise, the googly eyes were glued to animal shaped balloons.

The helium inside lifted the balloon animals out the door and into the air. A wide smile came across Fluttershy's face as she watched the balloons float away, being one of the most beautiful things she had seen all day.

Looking back to Pinkie who was rushing forwards with Lassie close behind, she smiled and grabbed Pinkie into a hug as she reached her. “Oh thank you so much Pinkie. That was a wonderful surprise,” she thanked her friend, taking the pink mare completely offguard.

“Wait... what?!” Pinkie gasped and Lassie snickered.

“Gotcha! I said there was one pony in town I had yet to prank. I didn't tell you who. I knew for sure I couldn't do Fluttershy cause she'd be mortified if we did anything worthwhile... but I knew if I said I was going to get her, you'd break down...” Lassie revealed her plan and Pinkie blinked in disbelief while Fluttershy took them both into a warming hug.

“Oh thank you both so much. That was a wonderful surprise,” she said in a genuinely happy tone. Pinkie was left baffled but ended up giggling while Lassie squirmed a bit in Fluttershy's overly loving hug...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

The group of us sat out around a campfire we had set up for the night. It was a fine night out and realistically... pony sized beds were a little small for me. For the past few nights I had just tossed a bunch of blankets and cushions in the back box of my truck and slept there, since the weather was permitting.

This night however, Braeburn, Applejack and a few others decided to camp outside in the pasture fields. The family told stories of past and present, sharing a laugh over some kinda special family brewed cider.

Braeburn had come to be relatively calm around me, no longer fearing me as some outlaw or something rather. The stallion offered me a mug of the bubbly substance. I took a sniff. It kinda smelt like cider. Maybe this was the special brew Mac had talked about.

“Careful, it's got some bite,” Brae warned and I rose a brow.

“Bite?” I asked.

“Yeah... yah know... might make yah a tad bit wobbly iffen yah drink too much,” he chuckled and I looked to the drink. I dipped my pinkie finger in the liquid and took a taste. It was bitterly sweet but had a tangy aftertaste kinda a little like hard liquor.

With great courtesy, I offered the drink back. “Uhh... sorry, I don't drink,” I replied and Brae blinked.

“Really? If yah don't like it, yah can just say. It's alright,” he offered but I shook my head.

“No, it's not that. I just don't drink. But if I was a drinkin' man, I'd love to have some,” I replied, much to his shock. Granny Orchard spoke up. I kinda liked her, she reminded me a little of Granny Smith.

Her voice now however was a little slurred, no doubt due to the hard cider. “Well... ain'th that somethin'. Applejack sweetie, thisssh one's a real keeper. Strappin' young stallion an' don't even drink none,” she commented and Applejack spoke up.

“Uhh... no granny. Ain't what yah think. He's just-” she was cut off by a hiccup. “Just a friend,” she replied. Orchard laughed heartily.

“Oh... Ahhhh seeeeeen it all before. You youngin's are luckier than yah know. Gettin' that warm fuzzy feelin' inside when yer around them. Blushin' and such. The butterflies in yer belly,” the older mare replied. I rose a brow.

'What is she goin' on about?' I thought to myself. Applejack shook her head. “No-no Granny Orchard, really. He's just a-" she was cut of by another hiccup. "Friend,” Applejack said surely. Orchard just laughed.

“Oh what I'd do tah be young again. That's what yah'll say. Just a friend. Fact is though, stallion 'n' a mare spend nuff time around one another they's start tah multiply,” she giggled and I gulped, starting to get what she was hinting at.

“UGH! NO! Applejack's right. We're just friends. Actually, she's my boss!” I stammered. I mean, sure I liked Applejack. In fact the past few days we had gotten to know each other better but neither of us saw each other like that and that was the end of the story.

Orchard just laughed. “OoOOOOOooh, Applejack... goin' fer the employees are yah! Teh-hee-hee...” she giggled. “Yah know... iffen ah was younger... ah'd have a good ruttin' on yah, let me tell yah. Though yah'd break muh hipssh these days,” she mentioned and I shuddered.

Braeburn gulped, realizing this was getting a tad bit wierd. “Uhm, granny... ah think yah done had enough teh drink tahnight,” he commented, nodding to two of his other cousins, who in turn helped Granny Orchard to her hooves and off to bed, however reluctant she was to go.

I shuddered from the image of the elder mare in bed. I needed that image gone, and fast. “Hey Brae... ah'll take that drink now,” I mentioned. He handed me another mug and I pounded it back, ignoring the sudsy, bitter aftertaste.

AJ chuckled. “WOAH! Slow up there Burdy. Gonna hit the ground hard yah don't take it easy, specially iffen yah don't drink often...” she commented and that was really the last thing I remembered for the night...

Hours later...

The warmth of the sun prickled the hair on my arms and chest. A slight shiver went down my bare back. I felt the soft grass brushing up against my body, along with a pair of hooves wrapped around my chest. My vision was blurry at best and I couldn't make much out.

But regardless, the hooves were soft, gentle... with a touch of loving feel to them. I placed one of my hands over them and snuggled tightly. I felt soft breath against my face and cracked open my left eye. It didn't help that my left eye was damaged and I could only make out blurred images.

Whomever it was... they had blonde hair... and I think a somewhat medium built frame... and was just a few inches from my face. “Uhmph... muh... huh?” I asked drowsily. My concsious spoke up in a chuckled tone. 'Got an old coat for a pillow... and the earth was last night's bed...'

“Ugh.. shut up,” I grunted then realized I was missing more than just my eye patch. My shirt, socks and boots were gone too, leaving me in just my pants.

I lifted my head so I could open my right eye, only to see it was Braeburn resting with me. “GAH!” I gasped in horror. I had slept with a dude last night!

I nearly jumped out of my skin as I rolled back, only to remember there was a pony behind me, the one's whose hooves were wrapped around my chest. I nearly rolled onto them as they yelped. “AHHH, HEY!” Yelped a distinctly familiar voice.

Pushing myself up, I turned to the scene where I had slept last night, Applejack waking drowsily from her rest and Braeburn having been woken from the commotion. Their mane's were frazzled and their fur was tuffed in several places. I stroked my face in disbelief.

I had slept with a dude last night. Not in like a tent in separate sleeping bags but like on the ground face to face. “Ughh... please don't tell me anything happened,” I groaned. Applejack spoke up.

“Ahh tolds yah Brae. We shouldn't a been drinkin' so much last night. Ah just knew we'd have headaches in the mornin'.” She looked to me. “Morning Sugarcube. How yah feelin'?” she asked.

“Gay,” I replied and she cocked a brow.

“Why... oh, don't worry none bout that. Nothin' like that happened. Yah passed out early on the ground an we was gonna help yah teh yer sleepin' roll but... well, we had too much tah drink and ended up fallin' over. The ground was cold an'... well, yah'll was warm so we snuggled up teh yah... hope yah don't mind,” she commented and Braeburn nodded.

“Like a darn furnace. Even the ground where yah was laying is still toasty,” he commented. I flumped down to my rump and sighed, feeling a little sick to my stomach. Braebrun placed a hoof on my shoulder. “Dun worry. Ah wouldn't do nothin' like what yer thinkin tah yah, specially the way yah were last night. Ain't right takin' 'vantage a ponies like that,” he commented but still I felt sick to my stomach. The distraught feeling of sleeping with another male had past, thanks to their assurance, but something else was tiding me over.

I leaned away and puked. I had this reminiscent feeling that it burned more coming up than it did going down. “Uhhghhh...” I moaned, puking twice more before wiping my lips and spitting several times to try and get the nasty taste of puke out of my mouth. Applejack groaned as she tried to stand up.

“Told yah. Said yah shouldn't drink so heavily,” she commented matter-of-factly. I kept stroking my face as I dealt with my upset stomach. Braeburn leaned back and basked in the morning sun.

“Ah'm thinkin' we start a bit late tahday...”

* * *

Third person...

Lassie grumbled to herself as she mingled along through the desert planes towards Flim and Flam's garage. “Figures... Pinkie has to work today...” she muttered to herself. She licked her dry lips, cursing herself for having not brought water along with her.

She knew Evan wouldn't be back until Saturday, Friday night at the earliest but she figured he'd be too wiped to do anything when he got home. Taking into account her options, she decided the best route would be to bug Flim and Flam.

“No... they couldn't have a map to this place,” she grumbled as she ascended another sand dune. To her luck, she finally found the garage. “Score!” She rushed along through the soft desert sand that spread apart under her paws as she raced along.

As she neared, she began yelling out for the brothers but got no response even as she came to a stop at the shop doors. “Hey... HEY! FLIM, FLAM!” Lassie screamed but there wasn't even a mouse's squeak to answer.

Lassie put her nose to the ground and began sniffing around the shop, and under the fuel station canopy which was in heavy disrepair. Lassie sniffed around and wondered to herself why there weren't pumps here like there were at the warehouse near Ponyville. “Location...” she muttered to herself, figuring it would be a better place for fuel pumps closer to town. “Even then... Evan's the only one with a fuel driven vehicle. Even that dink Fancy Pants drives a magically driven carriage...” she muttered to herself as she searched for signs of life.

Walking into the station itself, which had undoubtedly become the F brother's living quarters, she spotted a soda machine. Walking over, she put a bit into the machine and chose a beverage, only to be rewarded with nothing. “UGH! HEY! THAT'S MY MONEY!” Lassie yelled and tried to shake the machine for her soda, only then realizing there was a paper note taped to the machine that read the dreaded words 'OUT OF ORDER'.

Lassie twitched her jaw to one side in irritation and searched the place for any sort of refreshment, finding nothing. “I do not wanna walk all the way back without something to wet my whistle. It's like above fifty out there,” she mentioned. Looking to the nearby thermometer, she was indeed correct, as the temperature reached above fifty degrees Celsius which was particularly hard on her due to her thick fur coat.

Taking a deep breath, she wandered into the workshop. As she entered, she was astounded by the sight of the light armored custom vehicle Flim and Flam had built. “Juggernaut...” Lassie commented with a smirk.

'With this baby I could make it back to Ponyville no problem... and have some pimpin' as wheels... oh baby!' She thought to herself as she opened the driver side door and hopped in. Rather quickly however, she realized the lack of keys.

“OH FOR FU...” she trailed off and looked around with an annoyed exhale. “No, it can't be scripted that the keys are in the ignition. Make me look around why don't yah... probably cause yah like lookin' at my ass while I'm knelt down lookin' under tables for the keys, yah perv...”

She got out and began searching around the shop, grumbling to herself about her rotten luck. As she wandered around she found her way back into the station area while she searched for the keys.

After what seemed like hours and only amounted to about twenty minutes, Lassie flumped down on a pull out couch. Nearby she spotted a letter on the station counter. Standing back up she retrieved the letter and took a look. It was a message to anyone who stopped by that the F brothers had gone to Mareami to showcase fashion clothes with Sapphire Shores.

“Yes... because a couple a con artists are now fashionistas...” as she trailed off she looked back to Juggernaut. “Fricken looks like something outta some kinda action flick or something. Guy drivin' it would probably shout some pun or have the keys hidden above the ohhh...” A devious grin came across Lassie's face as she was struck by a sudden realization. With a smile, she walked over and back into the vehicle.

Hopping into the driver seat she muttered to herself. “Give me some sugar baby.” She put on a straight face and reached for the sun visor, pulling it down and snatching a pair of keys from midair. “Excellent,” she commented in a blunt voice.

Fitting the keys into the ignition, she gave them a twist and the truck rumbled to life. “AHHH YEAH!” Lassie cheered. No sooner had she, a male voice interrupted her.

“Voice recognition complete. Welcome... Lassie,” the truck voice said in a tone similar to one of the F brothers.

“Woah... you can talk?” Lassie asked but got no reply. “Dammit. For a second there I thought-” the truck voice cut her short.

“Please input command, or switch to manual operation,” the vehicle stated and Lassie scrunched her nose.

“Yeah, manual... go manual... err, nevermind,” Lassie commented as the garage door rolled up on its own. Slipping the vehicle into drive she pulled away, the heavy duty motor chugging away as she drove out, the garage doors closing behind her. “Huh... guess they have this place all wired up electrically huh?” Lassie asked.

The truck spoke up. “I'm sorry. I could not understand your command. Can you repeat the destination?” the truck asked and Lassie groaned as she began fiddling with buttons.

“You're going to be more trouble than you're worth huh?” she asked, finding a power button to switch off the voice control. As she plundered through the desert planes, she rose a brow. “Okay hot stuff... I've seen what yah can do in icy conditions... let's see what yah can do in desert sand...”

Lassie put the pedal to the floor. The supped up engine, loosely based off Cadance's 7.3L turbo, roared like a wild beast as the straight pipe exhaust fumed. The vehicle easily trudged through the desert sand and soon enough Lassie was taking the truck airborne off several sand dunes. The truck's interior vibrated slightly from the tremendous power the engine was putting out. “Ooooh... I like you... this makes me moist...” Lassie murmered as one of her paws reached down between her legs...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

The heat beamed down on the back of my neck. Sweat poured down my face and back. All I kept on my upper body was a tank top. I had my duster coat folded on my shoulder to help soften the feel of the heavy piece of lumber I was lugging around. In my left hand I held the heavy axe, right arm curled up along the side of the log to help keep it steady.

Before putting on a blatant expression, I smirked. 'I feel like John Matrix here...' I thought to myself. Applejack trotted at my side, pulling along a wagon that was loaded with lumber. Lucky girl.

They didn't have any wagons that would be compatible with my body type, and nothing that could hitch to Cadance. Reaching the Appleloosa Apple farm on the outskirts of town, we set aside the lumber and began sawing it in lengths using a two pony saw. When we cut enough lengths, I'd use the axe to split them into quarters or halves.

We had been at this all day, and needless to say it was finally getting to me. “Whew... hey AJ... ah dunno bout you, but how bout a little break?” I asked, wiping the sweat from my forehead.

“Aww, come on. What's the matter? Worn yah out already, yah big lug?” she teased competitively.

“Eh... yah ain't payin' me fer this... reckon ah deserve a little break every now an then,” I replied, not quite noticing the accent I was starting to receive from spending so much time with her folks.

“Well, reckonin' ah ain't gettin' paid neither sugarcube,” she replied. I rolled my eye and flumped down with an exhausted exhale. Man it was hot today. AJ laughed as she flumped down beside me, tossing me a water bottle which I squeezed the contents out in a matter of a second, downing it completely.

“Well shucks. Yah ain't the one with a fur coat yet yer sweatin' like a sieve,” she commented. I rose a brow.

“Well I'm not the one getting to pull the wagon. I have to carry these damn logs on my shoulder yah know... all the way from the pasture...” We sat for a moment and began to laugh hearitly. I leaned my head back as I shut my eye.

The sun beat relentlessly upon me. Huh... bet I had a tan going now. Sweat beaded down and around my eye patch, trickling down my face and to my chin, were it dropped like water to my chest.

I bet I stank some kinda bad... “Ain't worked this hard since... gee, ah guess since ah was cuttin' wood fer my home back on my world... wood fireplace, eh,” I replied. Applejack turned and look to me.

“What was yer home like anyways? Iffen yah don't mind me asking?” she asked and I shrugged. At first I thought nothing of it. I spoke, though due to my exhaustion, my voice was little more than a whisper.

“Log home... secluded in the countryside forests.” With my eyes closed I envisioned my home. I found myself walking down a trail that passed for a lane way which was just short of a kilometer long, stretching down into the deep forest, having a few turns and bends in the path.

Near the end there was a fork in the road. The path to the left led to the welding shop my uncles had set up and the right to our log home. Several wood sheds and larger buildings resided around the home...

A large area had been cleared out, gravel set down for the parking spaces. There was a turnaround that had a tree in the middle, along with another trail that led further into the property but only consisted of swamps and makeshift bridges.

There was a large building with a smokestack chimney. Behind the home was a large expansive garden. The area seemed to have an... almost golden glow... like an aura, surrounding it.

On the porch of the home sat my grandmother, a larger framed woman though out of great respect for her I'd never call her obese. In the yard was an old Black Labrador Retriever... Buddy?

In my memory, I tried to raise a brow but found myself more of just a perspective, not so much a person. I watched as a spiteful old man walked across the yard and to the front door. I could hear the voice of a young child, no more than five years old.

“Friend or foe?” the child asked. The older man chuckled and tried to open the door, letting the child resist and hold the door shut, though several times the older man would pry the door open slightly just to give the young bleach blonde child a thrill.

“Friend or foe?!” The child giggled excitedly. It was at this moment I realized that was me... over a decade and a half ago... 'Friend or foe... ugh!' I thought to myself, remembering the games I would play with my grandfather when he'd come home from work, not having a father in my life.

After a few moments, the old man ended up leaving the front door and walked around to the back side of the house. The child however, was unaware the elder man had left. “Friend or foe?” he giggled, but got no response.

He child stopped for a moment and peaked out the door, but was shocked to find no one there. His grandmother looked to him with a curious look. “Where's grampa?” the young boy asked his grandmother but she shrugged, pretending like she didn't know what he was talking about.

The older man crept up behind the young boy and grabbed him, heaving him into the air and holding him airborne. “FOE!” He laughed, the young boy squealing in delight and thrilled with shock...

I gasped, lurching forwards... shocked and feeling a bit... I dunno.

I choked back a sob, tears flowing from even my damaged eye. I gripped what little hair I had on my head, trying to hold back my crying. Applejack was left a little shocked, I could tell from her voice. “Uhm... yah'll right?” she asked.

Trying to regain my composure, I nodded. “Yeah ah... guh... ah... haa...” I tried to speak through stifled sobs. 'JESUS... THE HELL IS COMING OVER ME?!' I roared in my thoughts, trying to suppress the emotions.

I was strong. Stronger than my emotions. Crying made me weak... and I couldn't cry, especially in front of others. “Guhy... ah just got some sweat in muh eye...” I grunted, my chest feeling heavy. “Gurr... come on... let's... back to work!” I staggered to my feet, still trying to suppress my thoughts... my crying... my emotions... everything.

Applejack immediately shot up. “Woah! Hold up there hotshot... yah dun look so great,” she mentioned but I turned away, making sure she couldn't see my eye that was swelling with tears.

“It's... gah... nothing...” I inhaled deeply, ready to burst.

“Hey... woah, take it easy. What's wrong?” she asked, trying obviously to comfort me.

“Nothing... AJ it's...” I couldn't say much more. Everytime I tried to speak it was like my sobs were trying to escape my body. Even with my eye clenched shut, I could feel tears running down my face.

My heart fluttered and skipped, my breathing uncoordinated. “AJ... nothing... trust me,” I grunted through a stifled sob, my voice barely a murmur.

“Well... ah dun mean tah pry, but it's obviously somethin',” she commented, not dropping the subject. “Come on, take a seat,” she cradled me back down to the ground. I cracked open an eye to make sure nopony else was around. There was nopony nearby... well, nopony close enough to bother us. 'Dammit... I'm so... weak!' I thought to myself. It had been so long since I had thought of home... I guess one really doesn't move on from home sweet home, it's always there in one's heart, no matter how deep.

I began to break into heavy sobs, tears now flowing freely and unrestricted from my eyes. I had to pull away my eye patch so my tears could run freely down my face and not get bottled up and sticky underneath my eye patch.

“Easy now... easy sugarcube, just let it all out,” AJ spoke in a gentle tone as she brought me into a hug and patted my back while I wept into her shoulder. I cried for what must've been minutes before even speaking, even though I was still letting out bottled up emotions.

“Ah just... goddess ah just... ah...” I cried, not able to really put together a sentence.

“It's alright... ah'm hear now...” AJ said, still rubbing my back. I held her tight, still crying. The fur on her shoulder became soaked with my tears. Thoughts continued to plague my mind, mostly those of my childhood and that of my home which just made me cry even more.

“Ah just... miss them so much!” I whined.

AJ continued to stroke my back as she held me dearly. “Who?” she asked, and I answered through a sob.

“Them... my family... my home,” I cried.

“Like... Twilight an the library err...” she asked, unsure. I shook my head, not really needing to answer verbally. She understood. “OH! Uhh... yeah... guess one would get real homesick like that... oh, it'll be alright sugarcube... yah'll got ponies that love yah dearly.” She nestled her head against mine, holding me close. “Ah know what it's like tah be away from home... maybe not like what yah'll got but... just let it out, it'll help.”

I cried for the better part of an hour and a half before finally my tears ran out. I sat there, reddened eyes and with one helluva headache. Slipping my eye patch back on, I flumped back against the wagon. “Ah'm sorry,” I whispered, only gaining an estranged look from AJ.

“Fer what?” she asked curiously.

“Fer cryin' like a foal...” I apologized and she just sighed.

“Sugarcube, tain't wrong with cryin', specially bein' what yah'll gone through. Yeah, yah've had it pretty nice with Twilight takin' yah in, but ah dunno how ah'd hold up in yer situation. Bein' sent tah another world and bein' told ah'd never be able tah go home an see muh family ever again... would be shatterin'. Sugarcube, yah'll are one a the strongest ponies... whatever, ah've ever seen, both in speech and physically,” she commented, making me smile a bit.

Taking hold of my arm, she looked to my watch. “Well... seein' as how we've been workin' fer most of the day... what's say we take a break an' get yah down tah the waterin' hole. Yer stinkin' somethin' fierce,” she commented with a chuckle and I frowned.

“Yeah, says the one with fur,” I laughed and she joined in.

“Ahh, see, that's the spirit. Now come on. Ah 'ave tah deal with yer stench any longer ah'll pass out,” she teased jokingly...

Friday, July 11th, 2014...

It was getting on to midday and it was getting time for me to pack up and leave. Applejack needed to get home and I figured I might as well be the one to drive her since... well, we were both going that way and had planned it like this.

I readied up Cadance and looked solemnly to the town. It had been only a week, even if it was a week of work... yet I had grown somewhat fond of the place. It was like a home away from home... away from home, in a way. Braeburn and I even became good friends and promised to write each other, seeing as how he finally got comfortable around me and found out I wasn't at all mean... I guess maybe I made a bad first impression.

As we were getting ready to leave, we gave a few last departure farewells. As I started Cadance, Braeburn stopped for a moment and hollered for me to wait just a minute. I stepped back out of the truck and waited as he rushed away and soon enough came rushing back. “Can't believe ah nearly forgot...” he trailed off as he reached into his saddle bag with his mouth and fetched out a western style vest.

He offered it to me and I took it in my hands. The fabric was soft and velvety to the touch yet felt firm and sturdy like leather. “Had it made specially fer you... yah know, so yah don't look like such an outlaw,” he said with a smile.

My heart nearly melted from the gift. I took the stallion into a hug, lifting him up and onto just his hindlegs. “Thanks Brae.” The hug lasted a few more seconds before setting him back down. “Ah'll always cherish it,” I assured him and he smiled brightly.

“Well... 'till the next time,” he gave his final farewell for now, to which I tipped my hat, slipping on the vest before stepping into my truck with AJ. With a somewhat saddened sigh, I pulled away from the town. AJ chuckled.

“Yah know, if I wasn't sure, ah'd think yah was an Apple, through an' through. Ain't never had none a muh friends get so attached tah this place from a trip of just workin',” she mentioned and I just shrugged as we began to put distance between ourselves and the town.

In my mind, a sad violin tune began to play. A single tear left my right eye. “I like them...” I said, gaining AJ's attention as we pulled away. “Yer family... they're really nice,” I commented. As the violin tune continued to play in my mind, I recalled memories from ages ago of my great grandmother. “My great grandmother played... violin... and she started to teach me the harmonica...” I whispered, though loud enough for her to hear. Though I was sad from the memories I would never get to relive... a sense of loving warmth came over me.

Applejack was a little astounded by the rather random upbringing of my topic. “Oh... uhm... she was good ah take it?” she asked. I sighed.

“Ah can't remember her playing. Ah was too young. Ah just... it's kinda of there... in the back of muh head, yah know?” I told her. With a sigh I rolled my head from side to side. “Ah uhh... ah practiced a lot when ah wasn't around her so ah could show her how much ah learnt since the last time we saw each other. She lived a good half a day's drive north of where ah lived so ah rarely saw her. Meant ah got tah practice a lot and when we finally saw each other, we got had a lotta catchin' up tah do..." I told her.

"Ah never knew yah could play harmonica," AJ said, a little impressed. I sighed.

"Ah stopped playing when she passed away when ah was really young... ah dunno ah just...” I trailed off as AJ set a hoof on my shoulder.

“Ah'm sorry tah hear. But it's alright in a way. They'll live on ferever in yer heart. Yah know that right?” she told me and I nodded, resting a hand on her hoof.

“Thanks AJ... it means a lot, yah know?” I told her and she smiled.

“Anytime... now iffen yah don't mind... would yah mind keepin' yer eye on the road ahead?” she asked and I nodded, focusing now entirely on driving...

Hours passed and finally we arrived home. It was late, that I knew. Actually, according to my watch it was Saturday morning now. As we pulled into Ponyville, I nudged my sleeping companion. “Eh... we're in Ponyville now...” I told her. She woke up and rubbed her eyes.

“Oh uhh... uhm, yah mind stoppin by the library with me before yah drop me off. Just need tah pick up a new cultivating book from Twilight,” she informed me and I gave a nod.

Pulling up as quietly as Cadance could muster, I noticed something most peculiar about the library. It wasn't that the lights were all off, that was a given, it was really late... err, actually, it was really early. The thing that caught my attention was that Juggernaut was parked nearby...

I pulled my truck up to a stop and shut her down for the moment, figuring it might take a bit to wake Twilight up and find the book, unless she already had it out...

Applejack and I stepped out of the vehicle and proceeded towards the library. I took lead but just as I went to open the door, the hairs on the back of my neck prickled up. My hand released its grip on the door handle. Something was off, I could just feel it. AJ's voice nearly startled me. “Somethin' wrong sugarcube?” she asked, my body jolting slightly. Shaking it off as nothing, I decided to proceed inside.

Author's Note

Ahhh Lassie, you never cease to amaze me. You know... I think she's probably the one character I like the most. Just someone I can pile random things onto yet it always kind of makes sense cause... she's Lassie.
Cheers everyone... oh and...

Chapter 51

'Surprises!...'

The door swung open and I found myself staring into utter darkness. “Aww crap...” I muttered. I flicked the light switch, only to find it didn't work. “Nugh... bulb's blown,” I grumbled as I walked into the library.

AJ stuck close to my side as we wandered into the darkness that quickly consumed us. The only light that proved true, was that of the moon, shining through the windows and front door. Suddenly the door slammed shut and the curtains closed, shutting out all forms of light.

I spun with a gasp. “GUH! WHO'S THERE-” I was suddenly cut off, blinded by all the lights flashing on. I heard a canon go off...

“SURPRISE!” I jolted, nearly jumping out of my skin as confetti sprinkled down on me. I rubbed my eye and quickly focused it, still startled. My heart was racing but I soon found myself calm as I was surrounded by friends and family.

“Ohh... oh sweet Celestia... whew... for a minute there...” I panted through deep breaths. Pinkie came bouncing over.

“Did we getcha?! WE GOTCHA DIDN'T WE?! WE GOT HIM EVERYPONY!” She screamed in her regular bubbly voice. Fluttershy spoke up in her timid as ever voice.

“Oh, I hope we didn't scare you too much. We're ever so sorry,” she apologized. I was still a little thrown off and spoke in a somewhat dazed voice.

“Uhm... Applejack nee-needs a book,” I stammered but she just chuckled and bumped into me.

“Nah... well ah do, but ah can pick it up tomorrow. Ain't no big deal. Had tah make sure yah came in through the front doors,” she mentioned and I rose a brow.

“What is this?” I asked, still baffled by the random surprise. Twilight came up with a smile, hopped to her hind legs and planted a kiss on my lips.

“Happy birthday, silly,” she giggled in my arms. It took me a moment to clue in but then I realized, after several long thoughts, that she was right.

“Oh snap... oh yeah, it's my birthday,” I commented and AJ just chuckled.

“Yah fergot yer own birthday. Heck silly, that's the whole reason we came back early... oh, an uhh, that vest from Brae was partly an early present as well,” she made mention. I rubbed the velvety smooth fabric of the vest Braeburn had given me. It was fantastically well crafted and beautiful to look at as well.

I smiled brightly. “Thanks you guys... and gals. Everypony... just... wow,” I said, a tear coming to my eye. Pinkie Pie giggled uncontrollably.

“Well of course silly. Who doesn't love birthday surprises on... well their birthday of course!” She sounded overjoyed, like she usually did... so maybe she was just happy...

There were ponies from all over town, even my dentist was here. After several minutes of fanfare, the ponies started playing games, dancing and communing. I sat down for a moment, still shocked by all of this. It was so much to take in. Everypony, or nearly everypony, in town had come to surprise me?

Lassie, Spike, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo and Applebloom came over with some kinda scroll that was wrapped with ribbon. Lassie also came up with an envelope. Spike spoke for the group. “Here, we uhh... we made you this,” he said. I chuckled.

“Oh come on guys... you didn't need to get me anything,” I told them but still they persisted. I smiled as I took hold of envelope and scroll. Opening up the envelope, there was some scribbles that read 'Happy birthday Even, hope your day is totally awesome. Love Lassie, Spike, Sweetie Belle, Applebloom and Scootaloo'. There was also some hearts colored nearby. I smiled, they had misspelled my name and for whatever reason that made it all the better.

There was also a blue lipstick kiss mark near the bottom to which I rose a brow, only to have Lassie speak up. “You better keep that man. You know how hard lipstick is to put on?” she asked jokingly and I gave her a smirking look.

“Somehow I can't picture you with blue lipstick,” I commented with a chuckle. She just laughed back.

“Oh trust me, it works,” she said, then mouthed a few extra words so Spike and the fillies wouldn't hear. 'I'm dead sexy! Look at muh sexy body!' I just face palmed with a chuckle before turning my attention to the scroll.

Undoing the ribbon, I open up the scroll, only to find it was actually a large picture. It was fairly well drawn... err... well, I won't lie, it was kind of crudely drawn and by the looks of it with crayons but...

The picture took my breath away. There was a picture of Spike, Lassie, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, Applebloom, Ms. Cheerilee and myself during that school day Lassie was performing magic tricks.

My jaw dropped as I was left speechless. “I... I uhh... thank you...” I managed to close my mouth and swallow as they group took me into a hug, all telling me to have a happy birthday before departing, Lassie telling them she would sniff out the best food.

I shook my head at the thought of Lassie wearing lipstick. Just as I was thinking to myself, Trixie came over and plopped herself down beside me, nudging into my side. “Hey Trixie. How's it going?” I asked before she could say anything.

“The Great and Powerul Trixie is... well, I've been doing pretty well lately. Happy birthday,” she said and I just rolled my eye and nudged my body into hers.

“Thanks. So how's things with you, yah know... the magic act and stuff?” I asked and she shrugged with a 'so-so' look. I nodded. “Yeah I guess. Any plans?” I asked and she sighed.

“I might get a job,” she commented. “At the Tim Horseton's in town.” She smiled and I nodded. “Just to pick up the bills while I get my act back on the road.”

“Yeah, the cashier there is really nice,” I informed her and she nodded with a giggle.

“And a little dopey,” she mentioned and I rolled my eye.

“Yeah, but she's new. Give her some slack,” I told her and she nodded. We sat for a good while and talked, avoiding the topic of her brother and speaking of better times. After a short while longer she left to mingle with new found friends.

I sighed to myself, a little tired and exhausted now that I had settled down. Before I could really settle with myself however, Rainbow Dash came over with another present. “Hey,” she greeted and I looked to her as she sat beside me. “Twilight said it was okay not to get you a present... heck she told just about everypony not to get you one. Said we should just bring things for the party and just be here, and that'd be more than enough. I don't even know what she was thinking. Presents are totally awesome so... here.” She offered me a wrapped rectangular shaped object.

I opened it up and found myself looking and a flashy hardcover storybook. Dash spoke up over my thoughts. “I'm not an egghead just so you know but... well, seeing as how you somehow got Twilight the latest edition WAYYYY early... I figured you must be a fan to so... it's Daring Do, issue twenty-three collector's edition,” she commented and I rose a brow.

“Thanks Dash, but really... you didn't have to-” she cut me off.

“Oh don't give me that! Everypony needs a totally awesome present. Hey, have a happy birthday okay,” she told me before giving me a hug and departing. I looked at the story with a sigh. I didn't even read Daring Do books... but I guess I'd read this one tomorrow... err, later today, that way I didn't waste the thoughtful gift.

I leaned my head back to rest my eyes... eye, for a moment. In the back of my mind, as I rested, I heard a faint and timid voice. “Oh... well, maybe we shouldn't wake him. We already startled him once,” said a very familiar voice.

I cracked my eye open, only to hear Fluttershy gasp. “Oh my. I didn't wake you did I? I'm so sorry,” she whimpered and I chuckled as I saw Rarity and Applejack at her sides with a box that was wrapped in ribbon.

“Oh no... you gals didn't?” I asked with a faint smile.

Fluttershy peeped. “Oh no. I'm so sorry. I thought-” I cut her off before she panicked.

“No, Fluttershy that's not what I... I should've said something different. What I meant to say was you didn't have to go to the trouble for me,” I said with a faint inwards chuckle. This was all too much for me, it made me want to just break down and cry.

Rarity scoffed. “Well of course we did darling. It's your birthday. We MUST do something for you... so we all pitched together to create you something very special. Applejack designed them while Fluttershy and I crafted them with some of my special fabrics,” she told me, levitating over the box.

With a smile on my face I opened up the box, finding myself again slack jawed. This time due to the sight of some wonderfully crafted cowboy boots with finely polished spurs. I held a hand over my mouth.

“You... I uhh... uhm...” I stammered and Fluttershy spoke up.

“Do you like them. Oh I hope he likes them...” she whispered timidly.

“I love them... wow... you really didn't have to-” Applejack cut me short.

“Enough a that. Course we did. It was nothin' really,” she said as the three of them pulled me into a hug. I snuggled into the loving embrace for all it was worth before Pinkie's shouting cut it short.

“TIME FOR THE BIRTHDAY CAKE!” She screamed out, zipping around in a whirlwind motion. Mr. and Mrs. Cake wheeled out a large birthday cake. It wasn't any regular cake either. It was duped up with decorations and lots of icing.

'Wow...' I mouthed out in shock. The entire party stopped and began singing happy birthday, to which I blushed in slight embarrassment. I wasn't really one to like getting put in the center of attention, not one bit.

AJ nudged me over. “Come on birthday colt... err... whatever. It's only once a year, why not enjoy it a little,” she offered as she sat me down around everypony. The cake was wheeled in front of me, several dozen candles lit up as the lights were dimed.

I shook my head, on the verge of crying. This was... it was so wonderful yet... I don't know why I wanted to cry. There were friends, family... people I held so dearly. Even Derpy was here, whom I spotted mostly because of her crisscrossed eyes.

As everything quieted down, Twilight leaned down near my right side, whispering into my ear. “Make a wish, sweetheart,” she told me, while Lassie hopped up to my left side.

“Hey... psst, while you think of your wish, remember me okay?” she joked, Twilight giving her a glare. “What? I'm just sayin'...” she trailed off and placed a rather wet kiss on my cheek, leaving a blue lipstick kiss mark that I could feel.

I turned my head slightly to get a look at her. She had a dark shade of blue lipstick on, making her lips look a little more juicy and puffy. “Told yah I look sexy with lipstick,” she said with a wink, to which I rolled my eye with an exhale. “Now stop eyeing me up and make a wish already,” she whispered. I turned back to the cake and sighed.

I truly didn't know what to wish for. At this point I was happy, had a loving family, friends who cared... in the end I just wished that everything would always turn out alright, though it usually did anyways.

Before I could blow out the candles, I took notice of the big '56' candle at the top. “Fifty-six?” I asked and Pinkie nodded.

“Yeah, cause that's your age right?” she asked and I stifled a laugh while Twilight groaned. I spoke up to inform her of my real age.

“I'm turning eighteen,” I replied but Twilight cut in.

“Nineteen,” she commented. I did some quick thinking and realized my mother was correct.

Pinkie just giggled. “Oh come on, don't pull my leg. He's wayyyy older than that. Look, he's got gray hair and some wrinkles beneath his eyes,” she commented, reminding me of how fast I was aging lately. Twilight spoke up.

"Ugh... Pinkie, I told you he'd be nineteen," she grumbled.

I shook my head and waved it off. “Nevermind... it's fine... thank you... all of you,” I said, taking a deep breath but before I could attempt to blow out the candles, Lassie interjected.

“Remember if you don't blow out all the candles your wish won't come true.” I gasped and nearly fell forwards.

“Lassie!” I grumbled and she merely shrugged.

“What... I'm just saying... now hurry up and blow out those candles. I don't like melted wax on my cake,” she mentioned. I just grumbled to myself as I took in another deep breath. Thinking back on my wish, I blew out all the candles except for the big 56 candle that stood atop the cake.

I sat back with a smirk plastered across my face. 'Fifty six...' I thought to myself, rubbing my chin and cheek in thought. I guess I was looking pretty old, even though Pinkie probably had no idea what humans looked like when they aged.

The lights came on and I stood up, looking to my mother. “Can you slice the cake. I've always been horrible at that sort of thing...” I turned to look once more at the cake. It was kind of nice looking. Twilight's main group of friends, along with Lassie, Derpy, The Crusader's and a couple other friends came to my side.

“Say cake,” Mrs. Cake called out and I blinked.

“What...” was all I managed as a camera flash went off, burning a blur into my sight. Twilight hopped up to her hindlegs and gave me a peck on the cheek before levitating over a large knife to slice up the cake.

As Twilight handed out pieces of the cake, Lassie pointed to the part that read 'Happy 56th Birthday, Evan Burdick'. “Can I have the slice with the last letters of his name?” she asked, circling the word 'dick'.

I groaned, along with my mother but she cut Lassie her slice anyways. “I'll be thinking of you while I eat this, yah big lug,” Lassie teased as she nudged me while walking by. As I took a seat once again, Derpy mingled by with a small basket of muffins.

Taking a seat beside me, she handed me the basket. “Twilight said not to get you a present but I couldn't do that, especially on your birthday. So here, I baked you some delicious muffins.” I looked at the muffins which looked to be burnt all the way around.

Deciding to at least try one, for my friend's sake, I took one and chomped into it. Though the exterior was burnt, the inside was soft and smooth. Guess it's what's inside that counts. “Mmm, that's good... really good,” I said, finishing the muffin and taking another.

Derpy took me into a tender hug, which I embarrassed lovingly. Seperating after a few moments, I smiled to the friendly mail mare. “I really like you Derpy. You're a good friend... want one?” I offered her one of the muffins she had baked me but she shook her head.

“No thanks. I already ate. Besides, I baked them just for you. See yah later,” she said before getting up and trotting away.

At last finding some peace with myself, I let a few tears dribble down my face. I hadn't had a birthday party in a very long time... and even then, it was on my brother's birthday. Probably more of a way to get both our birthdays in one shot... like killing two birds with one stone...

Lassie came and plopped her rump beside me, licking some icing off her face. “Mmm, your dick cream tastes amazing,” she commented and I just groaned with a chuckle near the end.

“Laugh it up... yah tit,” I giggled slightly, thinking back on all our adventures together before taking her into a hug. “Thanks Lassie...” I gave her a pat on the head, and an affectionate scratch behind the ears, to which she leaned into.

We sat together and watch the party drag on, eventually dwindling apart as the morning continued into near daybreak. With a loud, extensive yawn that was accompanied by a stretch, Lassie snuggled up against me before curling her upper half across my lap. “Happy birthday... you deserve that much,” she whispered.

As she lay across my lap, I began to gently stroke her, starting from her head and ending halfway down her soft fur covered back. Despite being an English Rough Collie, whom are prone to getting matted fur if not properly groomed, Lassie seemed to somehow keep her fur nice and straight.

She didn't have extremely long hair, somewhat short for her breed... yet it was still soft and velvety to the touch. Silky smooth... I kinda just wanted to bury myself into her fur... but maybe that was my exhaustion speaking...

* * *

My mind drifted to and fro, and eventually I found myself stroking a very short furred dog. She was a mixed breed mutt, looking like a little bit of everything from a Tosa to a Pitbull, but with a bit longer and more narrow snout like something from a Labrador.

Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew it was just a dream, that these precious moments with my dog were not, and never would be, real. But I embraced them anyways. I missed her so much, though I tried not to think about her when I could. 'Oh Ally... how I miss you so,' I thought silently to myself, stroking her soft fur, starting at the top of her head and stopping halfway down her back.

A single, slow tempo, guitar note played in the background. It was a relaxing note, despite the deep tone...

My fingers swept through her short fur. I could feel her heartbeat against my lap as she lay there. Ever so often, she'd sluck with her cheeks, slopping up drool...

* * *

A gentle nudging startled me awake and Twilight jerked from my abrupt waking. “S-sorry... heh-heh. Figured you might want somewhere more comfortable to sleep,” she suggested and I realized the sun was just creeping up over the horizon. The orange haze of morning sunrise began to bask over the planet's surface.

The place was kind of a mess but nopony was around anymore, other than Twilight and myself. Even Lassie and Spike were missing from the scene. I felt groggy and still overly exhausted.

“Come on sleepy pants, let's get you to bed,” she whispered, helping me up and down the stairs, most of my attire coming off as she helped me down to my room. First was my socks, then was my my vest but I made note to hang it up nicely before tossing my shirt off.

I felt my body hit the comfy feel of my mattress but nothing else...

* * *

Third person,

Canterlot Castle...

Celestia peeked through her sister's chamber doors. “Sister... may we speak?” she asked, in a very hushed tone compared to her regular regal voice. Her sister, fur now darker than ever before, turned away from her elder sister.

“Leave us!” Luna shouted back, the tone of her voice making Celestia wince.

“Please sister, just let me speak to you. Let me reach out and comfort you,” she pleaded but Luna still kept her back turned to her sister.

“YOU CANNOT POSSIBLY COMFORT US!” She boomed before spinning to face her sister, tears flowing from her eyes. “You try to tell us... tell us it never happened. WE SAW IT! WE FELT IT! It cannot have been just a dream!” Luna boomed, her voice shaking the wall paintings, some falling to the ground.

Celestia took a bold stand. “ENOUGH SISTER! You must come to terms with yourself! It was just a dream! It never happened!” she ordered and Luna choked back a sob.

“If only you could have felt what we have felt. Bled like we have bled... only then would you truly understand the depths of it... NOW LEAVE US IN PEACE!” Luna boomed, slamming the door in her sister's face...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

I awoke somewhat peacefully, the feel of soft fur brushing up against my bare skin waking me. My backside felt a little chilly, as the sun's beams now shone past my bed and more to the center of the room.

I let out a morning yawn and Twilight giggled. “Morning sleepyhead, sleep well?” she asked and I just just mumbled something incoherently. She giggled again and nuzzled up against me. Her purple eyes seemed to sparkle and gleam as she looked into my own eye.

“Morning mum,” I replied and she exhaled.

“You know, it's okay to call me just Twilight,” she offered and I chuckled.

“Okay, Just Twilight,” I smiled as she rolled her eyes.

“Smarty pants,” she giggled. We laid like that for another few minutes before she kissed the side of my neck. “You know... I haven't given you a present yet,” she mentioned but I just shrugged.

“Sure yah did... yah gave me a birthday party,” I mentioned but she just kept giggling.

“Well... I may have made mention to do it... and maybe organized it... but Pinkie really made the party happen. But...” she trailed off and rubbed a hoof between my legs, stopping at my morning erection.

My body shivered as my erection throbbed. “Ugh!” was all I managed as she giggled further.

“Hmm... I think I may have something you'd like to unwrap,” she suggested, pulling the blankets off her body and revealing herself to me. She was dressed quite nicely in a dress that looked like it was probably made by Rarity. Though simple in style, it was very well crafted.

Without my command of thought, my hands began to wander down her sides, her hooves doing the same to me. I found myself undoing the buttons and weaved ribbons that kept the dress clung to her body, quickly tossing it to the side and unveiling her magnificent body. My breath stuttered as my hands stroked down her soft fur sides.

My pants and underwear were yanked off my body by her magic, releasing my morning wood from its confines. “Miss me while you were gone?” she asked, giving my erection a slight stroke with her hoof.

Truth be told, the whole time I was away at the Apple farm, I had only thought of her at night when I got a bit homesick, but during the day my thoughts were pressed to work. I nodded and she smiled. “I can tell, you seem a bit tense... maybe we can both relieve some tension. I've missed you a lot.” She took hold of my hand with her hoof and guided it down to her soaking wet nether region, her slit twitching from my very touch, a moan escaping her mouth.

As I felt the softness of her warm sex, my erection surged and my hips bucked a little in anticipation. At this point I was glad I didn't miss her too much during the last week, because if I did I wouldn't be sure that I could've worked effectively.

My breathing was deep and a little shaky. Her hoof stroked up and down my length, driving me wild in thoughts of what was to come. My index finger ran loops around her lower lips, stopping from time to time so I could rub her fun button, which only made her moan loudly.

Taking both my index and middle finger, I slid myself inside of her, getting a feel of her warm depths that squeezed down around my protrusions that invaded her. “You... you're such a tease,” my mother moaned.

It didn't take long for the feel of her wet pussy squeezing on my fingers to drive me wild with anticipation, so wild that I rolled her to her back in an instant and aligned myself atop of her. She exhaled a deep throaty moan of anticipation, her hindlegs wrapping around my lower back and pulling our bodies together.

I rocked my hips and found my mark. My rock hard tip made contact with her slimy entrance, causing another moan from Twilight. I slowly slid myself into her, savoring every inch of her insides that slowly enveloped my rod.

Her slimy juices quickly covered my groin area as I began to slide myself in and out of her, our motions quickly synchronizing with the other's. She held me tight, nibbling at my ear and neck as I impaled her with my cock.

Her hot breath on my neck drove me wild with natural instinct, letting my more primal side take over as I began to rut her. Every so often, as I'd thrust into her, she'd pull me tight with her hindlegs and give her hips a little wiggle, grinding herself against my hips.

If it was what she wanted, than that's what she'd get. I hilted myself into her and ground my hips into hers, only making her moans get a little more intense. Our lips met and our tongues began to do battle for dominance over the other.

The slopping sound of our hips colliding filled the room, barely ever interrupted by the sounds of our moaning. Her insides squeezed and twitched against my shaft, seeming to pull me deeper inside of her with each thrust.

Before I could really react, her hindlegs dangled down and yanked against my legs, flipping our bodies so that she was on top. Placing her front hooves against my chest for suport, she began to ride me like I was some kind of rocking horse, moaning out sweet notes of love.

My shaky hands found a place at her sides, helping to guide her motions. Her juices began to slime and ooze down my hips and the inside of my thighs, her pussy now leaking like a sieve.

“Mmm... yes, rut me like a wild stallion,” she whined out, thrusting harder and faster against me. “Hold me down and pluder yourself into me!” she squealed wildly. She must've been reading some of Lassie's dirty magazines because I never remembered her having a mouth like this. “Hilt yourself inside me and claim my pussy!” she cried out.

All this dirty talk was getting me going. I felt a hot burning sensation start in my groin and the feeling of a rippling orgasm began to simmer inside of me. I huffed and moaned, grunting deeply as she continued to ride me, moaning out lewd things about what I should do to her.

Feeling my limit start to peak, I rolled our bodies once more, pinning her to the bed and driving myself wildly into her. “Mmm, yes. Finish inside of me. Fill me with your hot sticky seed,” she moaned like a dirty filly.

It was a little strange to hear her talk like this, regardless if we were having sex. It just didn't sound like her. Uusually when we did this she sounded more scientific about it, saying things like 'ejaculate' or 'genitalia'... just things that sounded more like you were in a classroom that in the proverbial bedroom.

Her hindlegs wrapped tightly around my back as I kept driving myself into her. There was loud and rather lewd squelching noises that echoed off the walls as I kept humping her like a wild bull.

She let out a loud climaxing moan as her insides squeezed tightly against me. Her even tighter hole pulled me into my own orgasm. I felt myself erupt inside of her as I hilted myself into her deepest depths, plastering the insides of her pony pussy with my creamy spooge.

She let out notes of love as her rear wiggled and twitched against my hips, keeping me driven inside of her. Her orgasming slit milked my cock for everything it had. Soon enough my cum began to leak out of her along with her own female juices, spliced together in a passionate cocktail.

After a few moments, I pulled out of her with an audible 'schluck' that echoed through the room. Laying down beside her, she turned away from me and nestled her back up to my chest. She took hold of my free hand that wasn't trapped beneath her and held it to her belly.

I wasn't quite sure why, but I found myself rubbing circles around her stomach area... maybe it was because it felt warmer there than the rest of her body. 'Why is her belly warmer?' my conscious asked and I simply replied with 'Ah dunno'.

I was too fixated in the afterglow of our moment together to give a crap about anything. My mother spoke up and whispered to me. “Happy birthday,” she mentioned and I nestled my head against her neck and sighed.

After another hour, give or take, we both realized it was getting late in the day and that we should probably clean up and have something to eat for lunch. Twilight made herself decent and turned to me. “Care to take a shower with me?” she asked but I shook my head as I ruffled a pair of fresh jeans on.

“Nah, I'll wash up after you... might get a little frisky if I shower with you,” I said with a smile. She giggled and gave me a nod before heading off to shower up. I put on some casual attire before heading upstairs myself, only to be greeted at the top of the stairs by my oh so knowing dog, who had a smug look on her face, having no doubt peeped on us.

“Not one word,” I muttered and she just kept smiling that damn smile.

“Can we go for a walk in the fields and play fetch?!” she asked joyfully and I was about to speak up before her question registered in my mind and threw me off guard.

“You know... the only thing predictable about you is that you'll be unpredictable,” I said. She closed her eyes, tilted her head to one side and smiled brilliantly.

“Were you expecting something else?” she asked rhetorically, knowing damn well I expected something else. I chuckled to myself and nodded.

“Yeah, okay. We'll go for a walk. Just let me get something to eat-” I said and Lassie zoomed off before returning with some of last night's... this morning's, birthday cake. “Ha-ha... ahhh, okay.”

I took the cake and downed it. It was pretty good, I will say that. We stood for a few minutes as Twilight washed, then waited a little longer after that while she got something proper to eat for lunch... which annoyed Lassie somewhat.

As we waited, I also slipped on the new vest and boots I had gotten as gifts. Though Braeburn had made mention that dusters make me look intimidating, I slipped on my duster and cowboy hat as well.

Before we left, I picked up that Daring Do book that Dash had given me, figuring I'd at least give it a try for Dash's sake. Stuffing the book into one of the inside hidden pockets of the duster, the three of us walked along the streets of Ponyville and were quickly joined by Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo and Spike.

Lassie spoke up. “Oh yeah, they're coming too... and uhh... uhm...” she began looking around but before we knew it, a fume of sparkling dust erupted in front of us. As the pixie dust settled, we were beheld by Trixie.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie requests to come with you!” She took a very regal stance then smiled. Lassie chuckled.

“I invited Trixie too,” she said and we all smiled and moved on together. Passing through town, Lassie bummed some money off me to buy us some food, which Pinkie loaded into a picnic basket.

Walking out into the pasture, Trixie, Twilight and myself settled down on the picnic blanket while Lassie and the youngsters all went out to play. Soon enough however, they had taken my shirt to use as a kite again.

I leaned over to Trixie. “Hopefully they don't get it stuck in a tree again,” I laughed, which she quickly joined into. It wasn't necassarily windy today and they had a little trouble getting the kite to stay in the air.

Dangling my hand slightly forwards, I concentrated and used what my mother had taught me to perform a wind spell. The wind in their area kicked up and began gusting along, keeping the kite airborne.

I leaned back and sat with myself as Trixie and Twilight began conversing. Taking out the Daring Do book, I began reading through it. To my amazement it was pretty good. Daring was paired with what seemed to be some just out of school nitwit who couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag who in the end turned out to be a double agent and just as Daring was gonna beat Rufus he turned the tables on her, resulting in her being locked in a dungeon that was beginning to flood.

As I neared the end of the story I smirked to myself, wondering how much of this was falsified in Daring Do's favor, just like she had done to me. The day pressed on and I finished the book near late afternoon, the book itself a good read.

As the sun began to set I joined in with the kite flying and even played fetch with Lassie, who was getting exhausted from the long day of playing. As the day drew to a close, we all enjoyed a picnic which I suppose would also be our dinner.

Trixie boasted about her great adventures and accomplishments, while Lassie performed mild magic tricks with cards for the three crusader's and Spike. Twilight would, from time to time, correct Trixie on a few things, like the size of certain creatures and how they wouldn't grow as large as Trixie depicted they were, to which she'd say they must've been super mutant versions.

I leaned back and looked to the sky, the setting sun basking an orange haze over the world. Twilight laid beside me. “Good day?” she asked and I nodded, leaning into her for a kiss.

“The best...”

* * *

Derreck's perspective,

Hours later...

I crept through the dense forest foliage, stalking my prey who probably figured they were actually the hunter. From time to time I'd take to the trees, avoiding the brittle fallen brush that would likely give away my position if I tried to pass through it.

My prey scanned the area with her weapon, letting it lead her way. “Not so clever girl,” I whispered to myself. Creeping down from the trees I swept through the dark forest like a shadow.

She must've knew I was near, because she swung her weapon around, pointing it in all different directions, shouting out for me to come at her. Creeping along at a silent pace that was quieter than the very wind itself, I snuck up behind her, tapping her on the shoulder.

The woman spun, trying to get a bead on me with her M16 rifle. With my left, I grabbed the barrel before she could bring it all the way around. “Surprise!” I hissed. She tried to drive a knee into my gut but her strike was caught by my right hand right before I delivered a headbutt to her.

I released the rifle and let her stagger back but as she regained her posture I was already out of sight, my speed now ascending to limits I never thought possible. My figure was like a ghostly shadow. The woman peppered the area with blind fire, bullets whizzing in all different directions.

Stopping for a brief moment to reload, I chose that moment to strike. Leaping out of a tree, I hit the ground in a roll before rushing forwards like a wild beast. The woman quickly tried to load her rifle but I tackled her into a tree.

In a blur of motion I tapped against one side of the rear locking pin on her rifle, pulling on the other side of the pin to free the upper receiver of the gun. The whole gun nearly fell in half, dangling by the front pivot pin alone.

Reefing out her firing block assembly, I tossed it away into the forest, rendering her firearm nearly unusable, save for the grenade launcher attachment. She gave me a quick kick to the groin, staggering me back before looking to her gun and tossing it aside.

Tapping on my tippy toes, I kept my arms in a defensive position, ready for hand to hand combat. Instead, she reached for her gun, giving herself away too early. Her draw wasn't nearly fast enough and I was on her in a split second.

As she pulled her S&W 629 Performance Center from its holster, I chopped at her exposed wrist with the side of my palm. Her nerves spasmed and her grip on the revolver was lost.

The gun falling away to the ground, I drove a quick jab to her face, staggering her back. “Come on missy... you're getting slow on me!” I teased and she drew out a combat knife. “Oooooh... you really don't like playing fair huh?” I asked as she charged me.

Swinging the knife with great talent, it was all I could do but dodge her slashes by mere millimeters. As he kept swinging at me I kept moving backwards, bringing us even deeper into the forest's jungles.

Finally having enough of her failed slashing, I grabbed her wrist as she tried a stab. Twisting her arm, I brought her to a knee before slamming a fist into her chest and knocking her to the ground, the knife falling at her side.

I kicked her blade away, circling her while she gagged on the ground. “Come on kid... I ain't even drew my blade yet,” I taunted. Either she was getting slow, or I had gotten a lot faster.

“Didn't your mother ever tell you...” she trailed off and spun herself on the ground, kicking me feet out from under me. I fell and slammed to the ground as she hopped into the air and brought her heels slamming down into my chest. “NOT TO HIT A WOMAN?!” She yelled, figuring she had finally trumped me.

I forced myself into a roll, kicking myself up into a flip and landing square on my feet. “Don't think it's over just yet!” I snarled and she smirked.

“This was over before it began,” she replied, quarreling around me. Charging me wildly, I leapt into the air and drove her to the ground with an airborne roundhouse kick. Grabbing the collar of her shirt, I slammed her into a tree trunk and pinned her.

“It's over!” I snarled. Coughing painfully, she laughed at me.

“Yeah... for you.” The hairs on the back of my neck prickled up and I noticed a laser dot on my chest. Looking to the distance, my vision seemed to zoom and I caught glimpse of a stallion wielding a large scoped rifle.

“FU-” I pulled myself to the side as I tried to swear, but a heavy slug slammed into my shoulder and yanked me to the ground with great force. 'Musta been a .338!' I thought to myself as my right arm went limp, a gaping exit hole in the back of my shoulder.

I was lucky to be alive, let alone still have my arm intact. The woman walked towards me, chuckling to herself as she retrieved her revolver and leveled its sights on me, still walking towards me. “It pays to have friends.”

She stopped just in front of me, figuring I was down for the count and that I'd just call it quites and let her finish me. Instead I booted up hard, kicking the revolver clean from her hands then drove my heels into her chest and bucked her back.

A sniper shot blasted up some dirt just beside my head. 'Christ he's a good shot!' I thought to myself as I flipped myself up and to my feet. The gaping wound in my shoulder began to seal shut and I managed to scoop up her revolver as I ran past it.

Without aiming properly, I fired wildly in the direction of her sniper, trying to pin him down for now. I think it worked, if it didn't than he was either reloading or somehow out of ammo after just two shots.

I came once again to confront Kianna. Leveling her own gun against her I smirked. “Game over, for you,” I mentioned but she just laughed.

“You wish, chump.” Just as she said that, a loud racket of automatic fire ripped through the jungle as a pony in heavy clad armor charged forwards, two American WWII era .30 caliber machine guns mounted on his side, a large box on his back that no doubt fed the gun.

Bullets chewed up the dirt around my feet. I quickly fled to cover, cursing madly to myself. 'She really doesn't fight fair!' I thought as I tried to cap off a shot at the heavy hitter, only to find the revolver empty. “A lot good that'll do!” I roared as I tossed the gun away.

At first I figured myself to be relatively safe against the machine gun totting pony, until an explosion rattled my cover and sent me airborne, slamming my body into a tree and ringing my ears.

My vision was blurry but I caught glimpse of yet another heavy trooper now walking alongside his machine gun wielding buddy. This guy however, had two RPG-7s mounted at his side, both of them smoking from having just launched their payload at me.

“Mother of fucks...” I grumbled out painfully, blood leaking out my mouth. The pony with the machine guns laid down a suppressing fire that forced me into cover once again as his buddy undoubtedly loaded his launchers for a second payload.

In seconds my assumptions were proved true, unfortunately that meant the explosions that ripped apart my cover also tossed me airborne yet again. But, somewhat fortunately, I found myself tumbling across the ground rather than slamming into another tree like before.

Blood oozed down my sides and face, staining my once clean apparel. Kianna walked forwards, now accompanied by four ponies. The sniper, the two heavy hitters and some ninja looking pony who was dressed in all black spandex, or a fabric similar, with two ninja looking swords sheathed at his... or her, side.

I kept crawling backwards, now at my limit. I found myself dragging my body into an open clearing, my aggressors following me. I kept huffing for breath. I think one of my lungs were collapsed. The sniper looked to Kianna. “Just finish him already. If you don't he might pull off some fancy stunt and get away again,” he commented but Kianna held up her index finger, motioning him to shush.

“How? We're in an open field, guns all directed in his direction... he's mincemeat... speaking of which... cut his head off,” she ordered and the ninja pulled one of his swords from it's sheath. I'm going to call him a him just because.

I flopped back, spent, exhausted and felling defeated. 'Ha! At least it took a well skilled team to take me down!' I thought to myself in my dying moments.

As the sword wielding pony stepped over me to finish the job, the clouds above dissipated. The full moon shone across the lands, illuminating it as brightly as the day sun... well, maybe not quite.

The full moon reflected off her sword and I tilted my head back to see the full moon in all its glory. The ninja pony spoke. “Exposing your neck for me huh? So nice of you to make my job easier,” the pony spoke in a feminine voice. So he was a she.

I could feel something churning in my insides. I felt sick to my stomach yet more powerful than ever before. The moon reflecting into the pupil of my eye made me feelt it... the surge.

The mare swung her sword for my neck but my hand shot up and stopped her swing, catching the sharp blade between my thumb and palm. The swing was stopped instantly and her body lurched forwards slightly from the abrupt halt. “UGH! IMPOSSIBLE!” she gasped, choked in shock.

With a great surge of strength, my feet came between our bodies and kicked her several dozen feet into the air, launching her flailing body into the forest that surrounded the clearing. I felt my insides twisting and churning, my body taking new form.

I went to let out a wail of pain, but found it was more like a howl. I could feel my teeth, my canines in particular, growing obscenely large. The claws that resided inside my arms sprang out just as I came to all fours.

My shoulders hunched low as they broadened out. My fingers reshaped, growing thicker yet shortening. I realized my hands turned into more of a paw like structure, my claws becoming actual claws to grip the ground. The base of my hands and feet grew thick skin pads. My body lurched and stretched out, my mouth opening and letting out another howl.

Hair grew thick around my forearms and other parts of my body but a lot of my human skin remained. Standing up again... uhh... standing to my hindlegs, I let out a growl, the group standing in shock.

The sniper leaned towards his boss. “Told yah so,” he whispered just before the machine gunner opened up. Bullets tore through me and ripped out gaping holes in my back, enraging me further beyond my limits.

I charged forwards at blinding speeds, a red dust fuming at my feet... paws. The heavy with the launchers fired both shots but my speed was so incredible I found myself able to zigzag through them, as if the rockets were traveling so slow that I passed them like they were standing still.

Reaching the launcher pony, I hammered a powerful fist into his chest, sending him tumbling back several dozen yards, the force of my hit denting his armor. As he tumbled along, parts of his armor and his weapons flung off his body.

The machine gun pony lit me up, trying to shred me apart. I turned to face him and walked straight up to him, his guns blasting into my gut and spewing crimson out my backside. I grabbed hold of the scorching barrels and bent them to a ninety degree angle, rending the weapons useless. His eyes went wide as all my grave wounds sealed shut in seconds.

“Didn't your mother ever tell you not to play with guns?” I asked as I headbutted him into the ground. Though such a short distance, the force of my headbutt caused his body to crater the ground beneath him. He was lucky to be wearing that damn helmet.

Bullets ripped into my thick hide and made me flinch angrily. I turned to see Kianna and her sniper backpedaling to the forest, yelling for the others to retreat.

I charged after them wildly, snarling like the feral beast I had become. Kianna and her sniper split up, and I chose to follow the woman. She was the leader so it's best to take out the commander.

My speed had further increased, red dust and smoke fuming from my hindlegs as I ran. From time to time I'd hope into the trees and leap treetop to treetop. Kianna roared at me, firing into the shadows of the forest. She yelled as thought a fierce and courageous warrior, but I could hear it in her voice. She was truly petrified.

Getting close, I launched myself off a tree and tackled her into the ground, our bodies rolling before I finally pinned myself atop her body. I snarled, my mouth now starting to form out into more of a snout and drooling slightly.

I snarled and growled, barely able to speak anything intelligible. “Game...” I snarled before managing the last part. “Over!” Before I could strike however, a heavy slug tore my body off her's, the force of the shot dragging me across the ground.

I looked and saw her sniper friend. “Gotcha covered!” he said proudly. I growled but before I could get my footing, a bundle of dynamite sticks landed just two feet from my body and I looked to see the launcher pony give me a departing salute.

I realized that in my feral animalistic state, I hadn't caught onto the sense I was being surrounded. The sniper tossed Kianna her revolver which she pointed to the dynamite. “Lights out puppy dog.”

The gun seemed to shoot in slow motion, my eyes watching the bullet slam into the dynamite which in turn erupted viciously.

My body was nearly torn apart as I was launched over the side of a cliff edge I had no idea was there. I let out a roaring howl as I fell to the depths below and slammed into the surface of the river below, being dragged away by the rapids...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

I awoke with a gasp, the fading nightmare blurring off into the depths of my mind. I coughed violently before settling. My breathing slowed as I found myself in the safety of my own room, though it was rather dark.

I came to the conclusion it was still late night or early morning. I clucked my tongue, finding myself parched and just a little thirsty. I stepped out of bed and hopped along, the concrete floor a little chilly on my bare feet.

“I need a pair of slippers.” I ascended the stairs in a mere two strides, finding myself somewhat flexible and agile. I walked into the kitchen and poured myself a fresh glass of water from the taps.

Sighing to myself contently, I found that I wasn't really tired, despite how late it was. I wondered to myself just what time it really was and looked to the clock, my eye going wide with shock. “EIGHT THIRTY!” I gasped, realizing it was pretty late in the morning for it to still be this dark.

I rushed to a window and realized the full moon was still high in the sky. “Huh... maybe the royal sisters are being lazy...” I commented, remembering that in this world the regal sisters controlled the sun and moon cycles.

Settling with that thought I began to stroll back towards my room and saw the television on, the test pattern on the screen, blaring away. I also noticed a figure on the couch. I chuckled. “Enjoying the test pattern Lassie?” I joked but didn't get a reply.

I walked over but gasped as I found my friend cased in stone with a horrified look on her face. “GAH! LASSIE!” I screamed. My heart began to race. 'Wait... wait, I remember a story about this!' I thought to myself, remembering my mother once telling me a story about a funny looking chicken turning ponies to stone.

“Okay... relax... relax... she can fix this!” I told myself as I rushed up to my mother's room. As I entered however, I tripped over something hard and slammed face first into the floor. “OUCH! Dammi-” I cut myself off abruptly as I was jolted in fear by the stone formed Spike, a terrified look on his face also.

“GUH! AHHHH! FUCK!” I roared as I scrambled backwards, trying to find my footing. Twisting and leaping up, I came to my mother's bedside, only to be mortified as I found her too encased in stone.

Her face wasn't as horrified as Lassie's and Spike's... more of a heart broken look. “OH... OH FUCK ME... SHIT!” I yelled, beginning to curse wildly to myself. “Okay... okay calm... be calm... how'd the story go?” I asked myself, trying painfully to remember what Twilight had said about their encounter with the stone chicken thing.

“FLUTTERSHY!” I snapped. “Just... hold tight guys, I'll be back!” I assured them, though they probably couldn't hear me. I rushed downstairs and slipped on some clothes that I grabbed quickly.

Rushing out to Cadance, I didn't even bother playing naughty with her. This was a serious problem. I started the truck and raced at dangerous speeds out to Fluttershy's cottage. As I reached her little bridge I came to a stop in the truck. More shivers went down my back. All her forest friends had been turned to stone in her yard.

My jaw dropped open. This was bad... really bad... really, really, REALLY bad. I reached into the back seat and fished out the black box, quickly retrieving Belladonna and loading her up. Something was off... maybe not off as much as really disturbing.

I stepped out of my truck, leaving it running. I don't know why, but I figured I might need a quick getaway if things went south... further south. I kept my hand cannon drawn, letting the big barrel lead my way.

I came up to Fluttershy's door and knocked but got no answer. Knocking again, I became suspicious. I beat on the door, nearly to the point if I hit it any harder it would fall off the hinges.

I stepped back to boot it down but stopped abruptly. Re-posturing myself, I reached for the handle and opened the door. “Fluttershy? Fluttershy it's me Burdy. I'm not... not here to hurt you...” the last part of my assuring statement was more of a whisper as I looked around her home. It was dark and gloomy and on the floor lay a couple of her animals, turned to stone.

“Oh... oh no... no... NONONONO!” I roared as I raced up the stairs and to her room, only to find her too completely turned to stone. “FUCK!” I boomed and rushed back outside, closing the gap between myself and my truck in just seconds.

I hopped into the driver seat, feeling a sense of semi-safety wash over me. My mind drifted off slightly and began to wander about my options. No sooner had I drifted off in thought, a screeching hiss startled me and I turned to look in my passenger seat.

A dinosaur opened it's mouth, revealing sharp fangs as it continued to screech at me horrifyingly. Flaps on the sides of its head winged out as it lurched for the kill...

* * *

I jumped in my seat. I had drifted off in thought of what to do. I swung my cannon's barrel to the passenger and rear seat just to be sure. “TOO MANY FUCKING MOVIES!” I roared and quickly locked my doors. “Okay... okay... there has to be a book about this back at the library,” I assured myself, pulling away in Cadance and heading back to Ponyville.

Despite the time, nopony was out and about. “Oh goddess... oh goddess... oh sweet Celestia tell me everypony isn't a stone fucking statue!” I yelled. My truck screeched through the streets, the sky now full of rain clouds and pouring down relentlessly. My headlights pierced the darkness as the truck's tires splashed through the streets at mediocre speeds.

The street lamps were out. I prayed to myself they were on a timer or something and not out due to electricity outage. Cadance came to a screeching stop not far from the library's entrance. I shut the truck down and rushed inside the dark library, quickly fumbling through the vast quantity of books. I had no idea where to start.

The moon was still up, ponies had been turned to stone... the chicken thing. “What's that chicken thing called?” I asked myself, quickly fumbling through the books.

“Cockatrice... it's a Cockatrice...” I fumbled and found the book, quickly sifting through the pages. It spoke of things like it's feared stare that turned ponies to stone and it's appearance. It also spoke of how the Cockatrice, and the Cockatrice alone, was the only thing that could reverse the stone imprisonment it put ponies into.

However, it never once spoke about mass genocide... or whatever this could be referred as. It also never spoke of the moon still being in the sky.

An eerie giggling echoed through the library. I snatched Belladonna and swung her sights to the door, only to be greeted by the looming shadow of the doorway. I now accepted the fact that the electricity had gone out, though that didn't mean I liked it.

I stood idle for a moment before calling out. “Hello... hell... hello?” I asked worriedly. The giggle echoed again and I pointed my hand cannon in several directions before aiming back to the doorway. “Pinkie! If that's you this isn't funny!” I roared.

A maniacal voice replied, unfamiliar and it's owner not known to me. “Come out and play, hero,” it said in a feminine voice.

“Pinkie... FUCK OFF!” I boomed, hoping this was just some out of character, sick joke of hers.

“No pink here... just blue,” it giggled in a foalish voice.

“I'M FUCKING WARNING YOU... I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU, I SWEAR TO FUCKING GODDESS!” I roared out my warning but got no reply. I kept my finger just barely touching the hair sensitive trigger. I won't lie... I was scared shitless at this point.

Taking my finger off the trigger for now, I set it just outside the trigger guard and crept towards the doorway, peeking outside but seeing nopony around... at least I hope it was a pony calling me.

The moon still shone brightly down upon the world. It was the only source of light now that the power was out. I snuck out onto the street, trying to be as sneaky as I could be. “Dammit... I need a cardboard box,” I hissed to myself.

Now in the streets, I heard a laughing that seemed to echo from all around me. I began pivoting in circles, and soon the world seemed to be spinning around me. I stopped abruptly and staggered a bit before finding myself confronted by a group of five pegasi dressed in dark uniforms similar to that of The Wonderbolts.

“GUH! AHH... oh goddess... what the hell is going on?” I asked, figuring them to be friendly.

One of them was crackling with lightning, its constant aura around her was fascinating. “I want him! OoooOOOOoooh, I want this one so badly!” she said, jumping around finatically. A gray furred stallion stepped up.

“No, he's mine,” he grumbled. I noticed this one had a goat patch style beard that made him look almost as terrifying as the other stallion in the group. The white stallion, who was by far the most terrifying in the group, had a deep scar on his snout that ran over his lips, though thankfully he stayed silent.

The blue electric one pouted. “AWWWW! No fair Charger, you gots the last one!” she cried and he just grunted. I got a weirded out feeling from these ponies. A feeling that said they weren't necessarily evil but still sent uneasy shivers down my back.

“FINE!” The blue one griped. “Hoof, bite, wing!” she said in a challenging tone. The gray stallion just grunted and they faced off towards each other, shaking their hooves like it was some kinda game.

“Wait... wait, what do you mean 'get me'?” I asked in a stammering voice. I had a sickening feeling in my gut as my hands tightened around the grips of my hand cannon.

The one with pink hair, another mare, spoke up in an assuring tone. "Don't worry. They don't bite... much." She giggled which made me even more hesitant about these ponies.

The blue one smiled brightly as the stallion flapped his wings, the blue electric mare quickly cheering. “YEAHHHHH! Bite beats wing! I get this one!” she cheered and I blinked, feeling even more uneasy with myself.

On of the other ponies spoke up. “Just remember Blitz. Boss wants him alive,” she ordered and the blue mare, whom I presumed was Blitz, just nodded.

“Yeah, yeah Shady, stop trying to be a buzzkill. I gots this. Just you watch!” She giggled and turned to me. “Ready or not, here I-” she cut herself off and before I could blink, slammed into me, sending my body hurtling back. "COME!"

Where she had struck my chest resided a painful wound that crackled with electricity. I lay flat on the ground, groaning painfully but didn't get so much as a breather when she suddenly flew down from the sky and drove all four hooves into my chest, crushing my body into a crater.

It felt as though a bolt of lightning had struck me. She went to jump again but I managed to roll out of the way, just barely. Where she struck down was slammed into another crater, electricity spurting up.

“OoooOOOoooh, you're fun!” she laughed maniacally. I tried to get a bead on her but she was too damn fast and simply flew into me, plowing my body into a home, my body smashing through the wall.

She let my body go and I crashed out the backside of the building, coughing violently. I sat up but was met by the sight of her standing over me, her face right up to mine. “Give up yet?” she asked and I managed a gasp before she spoke again. “Too bad,” she laughed, booting my face so hard it sent me crashing into another building, this time though I stopped when I hit an inside wall stud.

I staggered, barely holding my balance as she charged in after me, just a blurring ball of blue lightning. I felt her hooves driving punches into my chest, each strike like that of lightning, sending waves of pain all over my body.

I gasped and cried out in pain as she twirled around, giving me a wink before bucking me with her hindlegs, catapulting me through the roof and onto the roof of a building across the street.

I caught a glimpse of her coming and rolled to the side. Her body came crashing down but she too fell into a roll. I didn't bother aiming, it took too long. If I was going to win this, it'd be by luck. I fired wildly, Belladonna roaring in testament to her power.

However, Blitz zipped and zoomed around all my shots, somehow traveling faster than the sonic bullets leaving my hand cannon. I gasped but that was all I managed as Blitz zoomed behind me and kicked me forwards, knocking my balance off kilter.

As I stumbled forwards, she rushed to my side and tripped my feet out from under me. I fellt to the ground, bringing my forearms up to catch myself. Blitz stomped on my exposed wrist and my nerves seared in pain, my hand wanting to let go of my only hope.

My lungs burned as though there was a fire inside me. With my free hand, I managed a hard punch to her throat which deterred her just enough to let me gain my footing. Bringing my gun up again, I fired off two more shots before I was once again relentlessly pummeled by the mare.

As I was kicked across the roof, I noticed the other ponies in the group watching, commenting about the royal ass kicking I was receiving...

My brows furrowed as a deep raging fury boiled over. I couldn't lose this fight... I had to win, because if I didn't, who would save the others? Blitz charged at me, swinging furiously and landing several breath taking blows.

Her hits staggered me towards the roof's edge, the buidling itself being at least four stories high. As she went for the final blow, I slammed the hilt of my hand cannon's grip into her snout, staggering her back.

With lightning fast precision, I gave her a roundhouse kick she wouldn't forget. Charging forwards and away from the roof, I plowed a heavy punch with my left that sent her twirling, but she quickly spun herself behind me at speeds I couldn't even see.

She drove several punches into my exposed back, making me howl in pain. I cocked my arm, ready to drive her with an elbow strike, but instead was stopped as she wrapped her forelegs around my biceps and slammed me to the ground.

Flipping herself into the air, she piled herself into me, striking me extra hard and putting a crater in the roof. Just as she went to hammer me again, I grabbed at her electric mane and pulled her down, headbutting her hard and sending her staggering back.

I rolled backwards and too my feet, realizing that the structural integrity of the roof had been compromised when she hammered me into it. I lifted my handgun and fired several times, not once landing a hit.

Belladonna's slide locked back, signaling she was empty. I managed a curse, but that was about it. She charged me again, a fury of lightning fast punches pummeling my chest. I gasped and wheezed as I was put on the defensive... if it could even be called that. I was more like a punching bag that offered mild resistance to her.

She jumped onto my shoulders, wrapping her hindlegs around my neck and squeezing, trying to choke me out. In another second there was a metal wire wrapped around my neck several times and she quickly constricted it.

I gasped as my throat was closed. Falling to my knees I began to fade out, only briefly hearing a voice. “Alive, Blitz,” said one of the mares.

'Oh... I'm gonna be alive alright... and you're all gonna be dead!' I thought to myself, reaching to the deepest depths of my power. As my mind faded out, I used what little strength I had to push myself up and ram our bodies into the roof access door.

Blitz yelped and the tension around my neck was relieved. I took a deep breath before reaching behind myself and grabbing the hide of her neck. Taking her off my back, I slammed her into the roof surface several times like she was a mere ragdoll. She didn't weigh much which only aided me in ruthlessly beating her body mass into the roof.

However, as I slammed her into the roof for a tenth... or eleventh time, the roof gave out and collapsed. We both fell down with a yelp as debris cluttered down with us, some heavier slabs slamming down too.

I was nearly crushed by a concrete slab that was used for the rooftop's surface. Pushing it off my body, I reloaded my handgun and looked around. Nearby under the hole in the roof, Blitz was squirming in pain, a heavy slab of concrete crushing her lower half.

My hand cannon began to glow brightly, the holy pearlized grips shining along with the golden inscriptions on the sides of the barrel. I struggled to my feet, a stone cold look on my face. My clothes were tattered and torn in several spots, blood leaking out of several wounds. Blitz looked to me with a terrified expression, squirming helplessly beneath the concrete slab. I held the gun with one hand, the bulky triangular barrel pointed her way. My eye squinted slightly, bits of skin and flesh missing from my face from our confrontation. A gleaming sparkle ran down the barrel of Belladonna, stopping to shine brightly just by the muzzle. My hand, several of the fingers bleeding, gripped the handgun tightly as my finger began to depress the trigger. “Hasta la vista... baby,” I quipped in my best Arnie voice as my finger firmly squeezed the trigger.

Time seemed to slow as I heard a loud roar coming at me from the side. Blitz's eyes went wide but within another moment they were gone, along with most of her head. Belladonna roared loudly, a brilliant flash erupting from the end of her muzzle in a circular ball of flame.

The slide slammed back, ejecting a spent casing before the slide slammed forwards, the firing block catching a fresh shell and loading it into the chamber. Before I could lower my sights, the gray stallion with a goat patch beard hammered me from the side, tackling me into another room and beating the living hell into me.

As he relentlessly pummeled my face, I finally caught wind of what was going on and hammered a shot into his kidneys. He grunted but kept hammering me. Another shot to the kidneys, followed by another and he stopped just for a fraction of a second to gasp in pain. It was all I needed.

Taking hold of Belladonna by her barrel, I pistol whipped him across the temple, knocking his body off my own. I stood up and found myself face to face with him. “For what you did to Blitz!” he growled before tackling me out a fourth story window. Lucky for him he had wings so he merely let me go and took flight.

Gravity snared my body and yanked me down, slamming me into a wooden bench that shattered under my weight and momentum. In a way... it caught my fall I guess. I spotted my hand cannon, just out of reach.

I began to crawl towards her but was pinned to the ground as that bastardly gray stallion slammed into my back with all four hooves. I let out a howl of pain, blood spewing from my mouth.

“CHARGER!” Boomed a voice as the other three pegasi flew down. “Alive!” ordered a mare with a plain blue mane.

“AFTER WHAT HE DID TO BLITZ?!” The gray stallion challenged back.

“Those are our orders!” the mare yelled back. The gray stallion stomped his hoof into the ground, cracking the pavement near my head. My eye went wide. “I say we should kill him now!” he challenged back but in response the mare tackled him into the building's wall and began to berate him.

“HE'S GOING TO LIVE! THOSE ARE OUR ORDERS!” She screamed before stepping back. “I hate it as much as you... but orders are orders, and we follow through with them, especially for the boss,” she scorned him.

I took this moment to try and reach for my hand cannon but the other white stallion spotted me, charging over and booting me so hard it launched my body a couple of feet. Before I could even groan he was on me, picking me up by the collar of my shirt and hammering my face with several hard as stone punches.

“I might not be able to kill you, but I'll still kick the living buck outta yah!” the stallion roared as he beat me relentlessly and tossed me aside. I found myself crawling weakly towards the water fountain at the center of the street.

I leaned myself up against it and just sat there defenselessly as the group trotted up to me, all of them with furious glares. “Meh... fuck you... do your worst... buncha over confident bitches,” I laughed, blood running down my face.

The one with blue hair, the one Blitz had called Shady, trotted up and began pummeling my face. Goddess... I don't know how long that went on for... probably only a couple dozen seconds but it felt like hours. Every punch was just as mean and brutal as the last, and she didn't let up.

Finally she stopped with a deep exhale. There was a burning in my lungs from the blood that now threatened to drown me. Whipping her mane back, she looked to me with a snarly expression. I chuckled. “Is that all yah got, yah pussy!” I taunted, which was followed by a hard headbutt that sent stars into my vision.

Oh sweet Celestia... this was the beating of a lifetime. She held my head up high for the others to see. “Boss wants him alive... something personal. Probably wants him on display as a trophy, like some grand accomplishment... even if we had to fight and sacrifice for it... but regardless of circumstances, he needs to be alive... sort of,” she looked back to me and dunked my head into the water fountain.

I squirmed and frolicked as she began to drown me but would pull my head up every so often just to let me catch a quick breath before stuffing my head back into the water. It went on for a good hour, I knew that much, before she finally tossed me aside.

“Blitz's death has hit me just as hard as it has hit all of you... but she was foolish. She let her guard down too many times and treated combat like a game, always underestimating her opponent... let that be a lesson to all of you,” she warned the others.

“And you...” she snarled.

“Me... me?” I laughed, weakly pointing at myself. “I'm not the one who's got my panties in a knot,” I laughed but was complimented by a stomp to my chest that probably broke ribs. I gasped and wheezed, finding it hard to breath. Yep... she broke ribs.

“Ahhh... yeah, kee-keep it up. Feels as... as good as c-cumming... like busting a nut inside a mare,” I coughed painfully, though with a wide smile to accompany it. I was treated with a kick to my already busted ribs. I yelped and cried in pain and finally she let up, heaving me up and setting my back against the fountain well. I smirked as she glared at me. "Thought you'd be taller," I chuckled before spitting a glob of blood in her face. My teeth were covered with blood and my lip was split. I expected another beating, but instead she just wiped the blood from her uniform with a casual expression.

“My boss told me... when you were like this to ask you how it feels to let your family down?” she asked and I just spat more blood in her face. She again calmly wiped the blood from her face and sighed.

“How's it feel... to be the last hope of Equestria... and to fail so miserably? Look at you, an absolute disgrace. Something not even a mother could love,” she commented and the last words hit me hard.

“You let her down... she was counting on you... and now she'll spend eternity in stone because you weren't good enough... so, tell me... how's that feel?” she asked.

I felt my body start to stiffen as nightmarish images began to wash through my mind. My legs became rock hard, almost as if I were wearing lead boots.

My mouth gaped open as I whimpered. “You were their last hope... and you utterly failed them,” she told me. I realized that my legs were turning to stone, and that stone was creeping up my body. A horrified expression came across my face but in an instant, my world was encased in darkness...

* * *

Third person...

The group of four stood around the stone statue of the man, a look of true horror on his face. “I hope it was worth it,” Charger growled and Nightshade just looked away.

“Shut up... you know I wanted to kill this guy as much as you... but that's why I'm the commander...” she trailed off and looked back to the stone statue. She twitched her lips before spitting into the statue's face.

Turning to the others, she dipped her head, the death of their comrade on all their minds. “Go get a drink... all of you... in memory of Blitz... I'll go report this to the boss,” she ordered before taking off.

The others all looked to each other and took off, except for Charger who stayed behind. He glared at the statue, a burning desire inside of him to smash the stone statue to pieces. He knew he could do it. He was more than strong enough. But doing so would undoubtedly result in death from the boss. Deciding to take the next best option, he walked up beside the statue, lifted his hindleg like a dog and took a leak on the statue. It wasn't much, but it was something. With his business taken care of, he flew off to get some hard liquor.

With the group gone, the streets of Ponyville, most of Equestria for that matter, was left still. Statues and statuettes left in horrified states. The moon beamed it's light across all the lands, shining eerily to the planet's surface below.

Time past on and with the weather left unchecked, multiple storm clouds coasted over Ponyville. Wild lightning left untamed ripped across the lands, chewing trenches and craters with each and every strike. Rain continued to pour down, as it had the whole time

The statue of the man stood still near the water fountain. Soon enough, the moon shone upon his stone body, the light seeming to reflect of his stone body.

As seconds turned to minutes, and minutes to hours, the lands were left nearly unscathed. Perfectly preserved in a bliss of terror. As the moon shone down upon the man, a slight crack rippled across him. Then another, which quickly spider webbed.

The stone began to crumble and fall to pieces, the ground beneath the statue shaking like an earthquake. Smoke fumed off the body as it started to emerge from it's stone imprisonment. The hands suddenly clenched, bits of debris cluttering to the ground. The biceps flexed, bursting away the stone around his arms.

The whole body tensed in unison, the stone erupting off his body. A loud howl of anger echoed throughout the lands. The man's head swung back and he roared in pain to the sky as his body painfully began reshaping itself. His shoulders dislocated and broadened out before relocating. His muscles vastly expanded, veins rippling down nearly every major muscle.

His brows furrowed as a powerful aura surrounded him. It started off as white and he howled louder, the aura changing to dark hellish red.

Widening his stance, the man boomed out a mighty roar as his power surged beyond his limits. A crater formed beneath him from his massive energy output. His aura began to flash straight outwards and changed into midnight blue.

The eyepatch was torn from his face, now revealing his damaged eye that changed vibrantly. His pupil disappeared and his iris flashed into a dark blue that matched his aura. His canine teeth lengthened noticeably.

The skin on his face began to burn in several spots as a long scar was burned straight down the right side of his face. Another started near the top left of his forehead and came down on an angle, going over his previously damaged left eye, across the bridge of his nose, crossing paths with his other scar, around his neck and finally down his shoulder where it stopped.

A final scar burned itself into his left cheek, a scar that was shorter but deeper than the other two. He took deep raspy breaths, his aura fading away for the time being.

He fell to his knees, gasping for air. Looking around, he took in the sights of the haunted town. Looking to the sky, he basked for a few moments in the gleaming moonlight before looking back to the world.

Looking in no particular direction, his expression went blank and he spoke. “I'm back...”

Author's Note

Dick cream eh Lassie? Heh...
Cheers everyone... oh, and

Chapter 52

'Personalities parted...'

Rain streamed down my face. It soaked my body with it's sensational cold touch. My clothes were tattered. 'Heh... first time Evan left me with tattered clothes,' I thought silently to myself. I took note it should be later in the day, not still nighttime. Even though it was raining it seemed drastically cold for a summer day and far too dark for comfort.

“Evan?” I asked, wondering where in blue blazes that fool was. Usually he called upon me during the day when things went awry. I got no answer. “EVAN?” I called out louder. Still no answer. “EVAN!?” I boomed, nearly as loud as the thunder itself.

I was left in silence. I stood to my full height and noticed myself in a crater. The water fountain nearby was overflowing from the excess water of the storm's downpour. A few houses nearby had been ravaged, possibly by the storm. Looking around, I realized nopony was around.

Was there some sort of storm advisory? Didn't the pegasus control the weather? Why did everything look like it did? Why was nopony around?

“What the hell happened?” I asked in a murmur, still getting my bearings together. As I stood there, hazy, vague memories flooded into my mind, recalling visions of Evan getting brutally beaten by a group of dark pegasi.

“GUH! NUGH! EVAN?!” I roared out just as the visions left my mind. I clenched my fists, my body tensing. My hands tightened so hard that my fingernails began to cut into my palm, blood seeping out between my fingers and washed away into the rain.

Letting out a howl of anguish, I fell to my knees with a roar. I sat like that for a good long while, facing the sky above and letting the cold rain wash down on me. As time progressed a shinning glint caught my eyes. My previously damaged eye seemed to be working fine for now, but I wasn't sure why. Standing up, I squinted my eyes to get a better look at the gleaming object that seemed to shine despite there being a lack of modest light sources to reflect.

I walked over to the glinting object. “Belladonna...” I whispered to myself as I knelt down. It was Evan's pistol... huh... ha, pistol... hand cannon more like it. I picked up the cannon and held it tightly. He always did love his novelty guns... even if he could use them effectively.

As I held it, the slide glowed, the inscriptions shining. I furrowed my brows. As fogged and separated as my mind was, I had enough knowledge of what had happened. Some dickhead pegasi had somehow turned everypony to stone, and Evan only managed to kill one of them.

I'd need new clothes, this was gonna be a long night...

* * *

'When we first arrived to this world we were one, our minds tightly bound to each other. I couldn't let him out on his own. He was too fragile and innocent. Both our personalities were spliced together, though we mostly acted on my impulse. Sometimes I'd let him act on his own but that usually ended oddly... like the time he was jerking off with that red stallion.

I never liked this world to begin with. It was strange... silly. Everypony loved, cherished, smiled... nothing seemed to be wrong. It was like a fairy tale. I strived to find us a way home, to the darkness. To the violence that I lived for. It was where we belonged.

However, in times of need when I'd take full control I was no longer simply a different mindset. No, it was even more. The body, for reasons I have yet to understand, changes. It mutates. It grows to accustom my personality.

Soon after that I started to become attached to this world. I found the darker places, the undergrounds. On top of that, why would I want to go back to a world where I was just an extra mindset? Not even considered physically real. A hindrance. At least in this world I had physical appearance.

As time went on, he yearned for love. As cold hearted as I was... as I still am, it is his body regardless if it changes for me in this world. I can't deprive him of that. I let our minds drift further apart and as they did, he settled into this world. He even has a mother... or something.

He walks through the planes of daylight. He loves. He cherishes. He is like one of them, even accepted and part of their lives.

I walk my own path by night. Just a shadow in the darkness. Even so, as our minds drift apart, he insists that I meet his friends, still believing the two of us are two separate entities... just like he still believes that mare to be his mother...'

* * *

I walked along, the rain still pouring down on me. Now however, I was dressed far better and more suited to the elements.

I was still lacking key pieces for the puzzle but I had a feeling that things were going to get hairy. I walked back to the town's water fountain, where Evan had fallen. Stepping up to the crater where he last stood, I took a knee.

The thigh holster on my leg was a little restrictive but it was constructed for Evan, not for my body. It housed his legendary hand cannon, which I hoped would aid me in my journey. I set my hand down into the burnt surface of the crater.

“This is the place where Evan died... and I was born... farewell my friend.” I gave my condolences before standing. I needed to see the princesses, if they were even still alive. For whatever reason, the moon was locked in the sky.

The climate was starting to change. Pretty soon flora would start dying and the lakes, seas and oceans would freeze over. If I was to do at least one heroic thing in life, it was going to be this...

* * *

'I'm not a hero. I never was. And like hell I never want to become one either. If you think either myself or Evan are perfect, you need a therapist. I'm a brute, with the personality to match.

Evan... he's kind, he's gentle, he's loving, but he's screwed up in the head. His mental balance is so offset by... goddess only knows what. Childhood mental traumas, motherly abandonment issues... everything. His current state rests on a thin thread so delicate that just about anything could threaten to upset it.

What I'm about to do would probably be considered by most to be unjustifiable. Cruel. Evil. Inhumane. But that's what I do. I am evil's greatest fear. An equalizer who doesn't falter on the morality of his choices...'

* * *

I stood in the rain for the better part of an hour, just soaking it in. The idea that Evan... my long term soul mate in a way, was gone forever. We were always together, our spirits twined with one another by an inseparable bond. And now... just like that. He was gone, and I was left to venture the world alone.

Funny... most of the time I found him aggravating... his voice. How he was so childish at heart. He could be a fierce warrior but at the end of the day he always reverted to a loving, caring man. I hated that about him.

And now that he's gone I miss him more than anything else in the world. I repressed the thoughts and got to the task at hand. Crouching low, I let my mind go blank, focusing on only one thing. Canterlot.

Red dust fumed at my feet and began to whirlwind around me as my body tensed. I pounced and my body went airborne at speeds I couldn't even begin to fathom. I sped through the thundering stormy skies and in seconds found myself diving down to the streets of Canterlot.

I managed a graceful landing. I had never flown before but I think for a first time that was pretty good. I didn't think humans were capable of flying but I suppose you learn things everyday.

My black trench coat draped around my crouched figure, camouflaging me into the darkness of the streets. I stood to my full height and observed the royal castle. It was still... motionless... without life. A gust of wind fluttered my trench coat flaps.

I brought Belladonna to my right hand and walked through the ever dark streets. Once bustling with lively ponies... now reduced to empty streets that only flowed with water that rained from the skies. Lightning would flash from time to time, illuminating the empty shadows of the big city.

I made my way to the castle, the guards at the doors frozen in posture. As much as I used to hate seeing these damned technicolor horses... if I ever saw a regular one again...

I went through the front doors and straight to the royal throne room. The hallways and corridors were eerie and dark, the torches and lamps in most of the hallways having gone out. Finally reaching the throne room, I stood before the massive doors. I blinked and let the feeling sink in. Taking a step back I booted the heavy throne doors open and steadied the cannon downrange, figuring anything but something good was waiting for me.

As I scanned the area, I found my assumption to be correct, though it sent me into further confusion. Evan had been physically attacked and turned to stone thereafter... so these pegasi must really get around if they encased everypony in stone... especially if some are stuck in regular everyday poses, like the guards. 'How the hell'd they do it?'

I rushed forwards to the stone statue of Celestia, slowing to a walk when I was within a few strides of her. Holstering Belladonna, I reached out and stroked the side of Celestia's smooth stone cheek. “How did this happen?” I asked, not expecting to get an answer.

As I touched her face however, a burning vision flashed in my mind, one that was so brief I couldn't recall it. My hand jerked back when the image struck me but when I placed my hand on her cheek once more nothing happened.

Something big had went down. So big that it even consumed the princesses... “Luna?” I called out, having not seen the stone imprisonment of the second princess. I did however spot Discord, also turned to stone. 'Why is he here? Usually he's at Flutterhy's...'

I walked over to the dragon goat, running my hand along his stone body. “How did they ever get you, old friend?” I asked, wondering just how exactly a group of pegasi renegades managed to get not only the entire population but also the princesses AND Discord.

A very talented unicorn with powers over the immediate environment once bested Discord and myself... but this... this was a whole new level. “Maybe these pegasi are better than I thought...” I whispered.

I left the stone titans to their imprisonment for the time being, deciding to check Luna's chambers.

I walked through the corridors once more, the odd torch still left burning while the rest had been extinguished. Finally reaching Luna's private chambers I entered without knocking. I was slightly confused, but not much more than I already was, as I gazed upon Luna's body that lay on her bed.

Her frozen expression looked to be one of frightened terror, one that looked as though all her worst nightmares had come true. I stood there for a good long while, just puzzling to myself. I had no idea what to think.

Slowly, I took a seat beside the stone princess, resting a hand on her cold shoulder. I was speechless and couldn't think of anything to say at first.

Time seemed to pass by at a bizarre pace. Before I knew it, hours had passed that I had just sat on Luna's bedside, silent. I stroked the side of her cheek. “I'm gonna find out what happened... and I'm gonna ask them pretty damn hard... and after I find out, I'm gonna get to the very bottom of it... and then I'm gonna bring you back... I'm gonna bring everypony back.”

I sat there for a few minutes more before standing to my full height. My trench coat flaps dangled in the gentle breeze. This mare had seen things in my dreams nopony should see. But she still saw them non the less, and the memories are no doubt the toughest battlefield she has to contend with.

I stepped out her balcony door, taking a leap off the tall castle and heading off. Those bastards were going to pay, but first they were going to give me answers...

* * *

'In times of extreme circumstance, situations arise in which the law cannot be relied upon to enact justice. The police and lawbringers become inadequate and order falls. In these bleak times only a select few types of people can restore peace. These people are called the necessary evil.

If you want peace, prepare to fight to your dying moment for it.

In order to restore peace though, you must act outside the law, think outside the box. Set your sights for justice and don't let a single goddamn thing stand in your way. Select a motivation for that justice.

Revenge is not a motivation, it's an emotional impulse. A natural reaction. This wasn't going to be for revenge. This was going to be for punishment, their punishment...

* * *

Third person...

Starry Skies sat back on her couch, wrapped in a nice plush robe with a glass of fine wine. Having just taken a bath in the nearby river, due to the power being out, she felt rather refreshed. It was a little chilly but at least she felt clean.

Her wine was bitter at first but had a sweet lingering aftertaste. Having been an aristocrat most of her life, she was accustomed to fine wine and fancy foods, along with plush furniture of apparel.

As she sipped her wine, her balcony door blustered open with the wind, rain pouring in with the storm. The doors clacked and shuttered from the violent storm. She cursed to herself, quickly setting her glass of wine aside and rushing to close the door before the rain tarnished her soft carpet.

Closing the door and locking it, she turned around only to be mortified in shock by the presence of a dark looming figure standing by her couch side. “Pretty eyes...” the figure said before looking up, a flash of lightning revealing his heavily scarred features, which made him all the more terrifying to the mare. “Too bad I'm gonna rip 'em out...”

* * *

'She didn't have much say. Was kinda surprised to see me more than anything. Didn't take much to make her talk, just a few steps towards her and she was pleading for her life. Said she was just following orders and didn't know more than that.

The rain cleanses the blood still lingering on my trench coat and hands, washing it away and diluting it into the streams that have formed in the streets. I made her death quick. She wasn't fully involved in the beating of my friend but irregardless she was involved in this... this genocide of sorts, making her guilty to a fault...'

* * *

Charger sat lonesome with himself, a glass of heavy bourbon swishing in his hoof. “Wish she had at least left some mares around...” the stallion muttered to himself. As much as he tried not to think about it, his mind kept reverting back to the death of his comrade.

Leaning back in his seat, he sighed before pounding back the beverage in one go. “Oooh... what I'd give to have a go at him again... then I'd show him,” he commented to himself. He briefly contemplated going to the man's final resting place and smashing his body into pieces but as quickly as he contemplated it, disregarded the thought.

“Dammit! With goddess as my witness... I swear I'm gonna find a way to break him in half... I promise you that much Blitz,” Charger said before retrieving a bottle of vodka and taking a swig straight from the bottle.

Before his lips parted with the neck of the bottle, the lights flickered on along with the television, which only displayed a test pattern. With a smirk, Charger smiled. “Guess lady luck is smiling on me,” he commented as he went to reach for the beer tap.

He stopped just as a cold voice called out. “Or perhaps giving you the finger...”

Charger swung around on his bar stool, presented by the sight of someone who only made him smile deeper. “Tell me what I want to know, or there will be... trouble,” the man said in a deep voice. Charger snickered.

“Oooh... tough choice. But... I think given the circumstances I'll chose the latter,” he laughed before cracking his front hooves. “Shoulda stayed under whatever rock you crawled outta... woulda been less painful,” Charger said as he began to trot boldly towards the man who merely stood expressionless as he spoke.

“For you...”

* * *

'He was a half decent fighter, knew how to throw a good jab. But nothing could have saved him from me, not after what he's done.

The fight only lasted a few seconds after which he gave the names of his buddies, most of whom were dead already. He didn't know much more than the last one did, other than the orders were given directly to his leader. He was telling the truth, I made sure of it.

Even now in the rain, bits of him wash off my trench coat as I walk along in the stormy downpour. I'm still no closer to finding out what I need to know, and the list is running short...'

* * *

Stratus sat with himself over just a glass of water. He sat silently for the most part, watching the ice cubes melt and create condensation on the exterior of his glass. The room was dark, barely illuminating his facial features.

Rather gently, he stroked a hoof down the texture of the scar that resided on his face. Closing his eyes, he let out a sighing exhale before taking a sip of the ice cold water. Having chosen this lifestyle, he would never go back on it, but wondered from time to time what life would be like if things were different.

Not so much his own actions changing things, but those of others. He put a damp cloth against the back of his neck and left it there, exhaling peacefully as he took another sip of cold water.

A crack of thunder jolted him up and he spun to the door which had been busted down. Rain water splashed in and in the doorway stood a menacing figure who was obscured by the darkness.

Stratus stood up, finishing his glass of water and tossing aside the damp cloth on his neck. With an angry twitch of his lip, he tossed the empty glass which smashed in the corner. “Shoulda stayed down for the count,” Stratus commented.

Lightning flashed, a white skull on the man's undershirt flashing bright with the storm's lightning. Heavy scars worse that Stratus's own illuminated across the man's face. The big, dark white stallion gasped, deterring slightly and taking a step back. “You're... y-you-you're not...” the stallion hissed to himself, realizing this wasn't the same man as before.

The man opened his eye, the other covered by an eye patch. His deep brown eye flashed and sent icy shivers down to Stratus's very core. “Tell yah what...” the man said, holding up a fist. “I'll give you three more scars just like that one,” the man said, just as three bony claws emerged from between his knuckles.

Stratus took yet another step back before taking a bold stand. The man twisted his wrist slightly just as more lightning flashed, the blood on the man's claws shining. “Whatta yah say?”

* * *

'He was a good fight. Way better than the other stallion. Maybe it was because he wasn't intoxicated. Cold water. Healthy choice. It didn't do him any good though.

He did however, despite his tough exterior attitude, squeal like a canary... that was off course after I started showing him pieces of himself... pieces ponies usually shouldn't see of themselves.

Told me everything he knew, everything. His boss, named Nightshade, gave everypony the orders. She had gotten those orders from her boss whom he didn't have a name for, saying that only Shade knew her name and the rest just called her 'The Moon'... he also mentioned that this... Moon character was the most frightening pony he's ever met, and that she'd kill the whole crew if any of them disobeyed her orders.

Their orders were to beat Evan to a pulp and make him fear something. After that their task would be complete and they had the world as their playground. Just Evan. Nopony else was around at that point. I'm hoping his leader, Nightshade, can bring me up to speed on everything else...'

* * *

Nightshade sat with herself and nopony else, enjoying the silence that had been brought unto the world. The day, or rather the last few hours, had been long and tiresome, even if she hadn't exerted herself all that much.

Finally getting a moment to herself, she laid back against the plush cushions of her couch and relaxed. Letting out a sigh, she whispered to herself how nice the silence sounded.

Without her knowledge, a large lumbering foe leaned on the back of her couch, looming over her body. “Is that so?” he asked in a deep voice. Shade went to jump up but was tackled to the ground mid-flight.

Derreck pinned her to the floor with ease, his body mass nearly two hundred pounds more than her own. His knees sat just past her shoulders, restricting her forelegs from moving. His left hand held her throat, keeping her head down.

For a brief few seconds, her wings flapped madly as she grunted whilst trying to escape the brutish man. “I'M GONNA KILL YOU! YOU'RE IN FOR IT NOW YOU HEAR ME?!” Nightshade screamed as Derreck reached over with his free hand and retrieved a bottle of liquor.

As Nightshade squirmed and yelled, Derreck's left hand grabbed her snout and pried her mouth wide open while his right dumped a good mouthful of liquor down her throat. “Drink up,” Derreck mused as the mare coughed and gagged.

Derreck took the bottle away, alleviating his grip on her head as well. The mare beneath him continued to choke and gag before beginning a threat. “You stupid colt! You don't realize how...” she trailed off as she glared to the figure, only then to have her eyes widen slightly. “Wait... no, wait... you're supposed to be...”

She was cut short as a crack of thunder and lightning boomed nearby, illuminating his face along with the white skull on his shirt's chest. “Dead?” Derreck amused himself. “A lot of your crew said the same thing... that is... well, until I showed them otherwise,” he mentioned but Shade just spat at him.

“You wish. My crew would mop the floor with a weakling like you,” she challenged and Derreck rose a brow.

“Maybe together... but alone... well, let's just say...” Derreck reached into the duffle bag he had strapped to his back and retrieved Stratus's head. Slamming the mutilated head down beside the mare, she screamed in horror.

“Took a rather nasty trip through a wood jointer, courtesy of yours truly,” he replied with a smile before putting the head away. “So... with your whole squad dead... and none of them having told me what's really going on... mind telling me what's going on?” he asked.

Nightshade began to squirm under his weight but to no avail. In a flash motion, Derreck swung his hand near her face and the mare flinched, gasping painfully as a small wound slit open on her cheek. “AHH! What the hay?!” she gasped painfully before looking up to see the man clenching his fist, three bloody claws protruding from between his knuckles.

“Interesting huh? Dunno why or how I got 'em but they come in handy... tell yah what. Tell me what I want to know and I won't turn you into a...” He looked behind himself and to her lower region. “Shit eh...” he said, turning back to her.

“You know... it's hard to threaten mares since you can't necessarily tell them you'll cut off parts of their body and turn them into the other gender... so tell yah what...” he said, crossing his forearms over her throat and leaning in close.

“Tell me what I wanna know and I won't uhh... do horrible unspeakable things to your body with my claws... deal?” He offered her his hand. Even if she had wanted to shake his hand, she was pinned beneath him and barely able to move. “Hmm... not the formal type huh? That's okay. I can work with that.”

Leaning back, he sat on her chest and rubbed his chin. “SooooOOOOoooo... I guess the most pressing question is how did you get everypony... turn them to stone like you did my friend?” Derreck asked.

At first Nightshade didn't answer. Derreck sighed. “Okay... I guess I'll inscentivize this,” he said as he grabbed a bottle of fine liquor. “Enlighten me to what I want to know, and you'll get a drink... don't, and I'll...” he trailed off and swiped his hand near her face again, giving her another tiny slit on her cheek, making her wince.

“Deal?” Derreck asked.

“We didn't...” Shade replied regretfully, to which Derreck rose a brow. “We didn't turn everypony to stone. That was our boss. I'm not sure how she did it but she turned ponies to stone using their fears or something... she didn't really fill me in on the whole thing. She hired us because your friend couldn't be turned to stone through nightmares or daydreams. He needed to be beaten down physically... that's where we came in,” she mentioned.

Derreck rubbed his chin. “So... you didn't... oh where are my manners, here,” he offered her a small glass of liquor.

“I wouldn't mind being able to hold it myself,” she suggested. Derreck lifted one of his knees to let her take hold of the beverage. She took her reward and downed it, not once trying to use her free hoof to escape.

“Not gonna try to beat me off? Punch me in the groin? Anything?” Derreck asked. Nightshade scoffed at the remark.

“How exactly would I get you off? You weigh a ton,” she commented and he giggled.

“Yeah... I put on weight recently,” he laughed as he sat back, making diligent not to press all his weight on her belly. “So... if you didn't turn them all to stone, who did?” he asked.

“My boss, our employer,” she replied, leaving the name in the dark for now.

“Well... I guess that counts but I was looking more for a name,” Derreck mentioned.

“Fine... her name is-” but Derreck cut her short.

“Woah, woah, woah, WOAH! SHE?!” He asked and Nightshade rose an unimpressed brow.

“What's wrong with that?” she asked.

“The criminal mastermind who's frozen the entire world to stone, imprisoned everypony and... is a she?!” he asked.

“And... your point is? The crew who took down your almighty friend, who couldn't be bested by my boss's world ending spell, was lead by a mare...” Nightshade informed him to which Derreck just rubbed his chin.

“Yeah... I guess I can give yah that one,” Derreck replied.

“Well in that case, you mind getting off me?” she suggested. Derreck sat for a moment then shrugged, getting off the mare and standing up, offering her help which she refused. With a stretch of her back she scoffed to herself.

“Sweet Celestia, you gotta lose some weight tubby,” she mentioned.

“Muscle weighs more than fat kid... now, about your boss's name?” he asked.

“You really want that information?” she asked and he dangled the bottle of liquor, the incentive reward for her cooperation. “My boss... is none other than... Nightmare Moon,” she commented and Derreck stifled a snicker.

“Come on... trying to give me crap like that.” He scoffed but she shook her head.

“None else. You can either believe me, or go to that ancient, abandoned castle in the Everfree and see for yourself... your choice,” she offered. Offering her the bottle, she took it and poured herself a drink. “Want some?” she offered and he rose a brow.

“You're free... completely. Yet, rather than try to get away or beat me down or kill me to avenge your friends's deaths... you offer me a drink?” he asked and she shrugged.

“You're obviously faster and stronger than your friend if you managed to kill off my entire squad in less then a few hours... as much as I hate you for it, I can only respect you for it as well. If you could take Stratus head to head and kill him than you'd probably wipe the floor with me too in a stand up fight.” She took a second glass and offered it to the man.

“Clever girl...” Derreck mused then smirked. “It takes a great warrior to respect their enemy... so... Nightmare Moon? But how?” he asked curiously to which the mare only shrugged, taking back the drink Derreck hadn't taken and downing it herself.

“That... is a question you'd have to ask her yourself,” she said before taking a sip of her beverage. Derreck nodded and walked towards the door. “So that's it?” she asked and the man nodded solemnly. “You're not gonna kill me after what we did to your friend?” she asked out of curiosity.

Derreck closed his eye and felt the rain water splashing against his face. “That'd be vengeful,” he replied and she nodded.

“One day I'm going to take my revenge upon you... don't you have an inner feeling of vengeance for what we did to your comrade?” she asked and he nodded.

“But revenge is not a valid motivation... it's an emotional response. My motivation is punishment. Punishment to those who truly deserve it... I've killed your entire squad for their sins, and you yourself realize your power pales in comparison to my own. You can't do a damn thing to avenge your friends's deaths... You're going to have to live with that fact for the rest of your life... and that... will be your punishment,” Derreck said, red smoke fuming at his feet before quickly taking off at hyper sonic speeds.

Nightshade sat down, cursing to herself whilst pouring herself another drink.

* * *

'The more I think about it, the more I start to like the idea of it all. Nightmare Moon, resurrected from the dead, subsequently turns everypony... everyone, to stone. Somehow, someway, I of all ponies... whatever, am left alive for one last ultimate showdown with her.

With nopony around for collateral, there will be nothing holding either of us back. I can go at her with everything I got. For the first time ever I'll be able to unleash my full potential... it's even a full moon out tonight, what luck.

As I walk through a random deserted town, I come across a statue of Luna, prior to her banishment. In the pouring rain, her features are only ever illuminated when a flash of lightning strikes in the distance.

I come before her great statue and fall to my knees. What if I'm not enough? What if I can't beat her? Then what?

The world's population will be left to her and Nightshade...

But I won't let it come to that. No, I can't let it come to that. Not after everything that's happened.

My hand pulls on the handle of Belladonna and I draw the sights upon Luna's statue and put one right between her eyes, just like I'm gonna do to Nightmare...'

* * *

Derreck's perspective...

Juggernaut, I picked her up on my way through Ponyville, ripped through the ridiculous forest jungle at a mediocre pace. The instrument panel readout said everything was running at optimal performance, for now.

As the truck trudged along, I drove towards an old acquaintance's place. I had a hinting suspicion she too was turned to stone but in the back of my head, I had this hunch... this feeling, she must still be alive. She had to be. There was noway she could be taken.

The truck pulled into a fairly large clearing, and at one end rested a large cargo plane. “Hmm... wonder if she's in a peaceful mood...” I spoke aloud. The truck pulled towards the plane at a peaceful pace. If I went bombing towards her she'd no doubt unload on me.

As the truck got closer and closer, I kept getting a worsening feeling in my gut. I pulled the truck up to the small encampment near the plane and stepped out of the still running Juggernaut, just in case I needed a quick getaway.

I stood near the driver door of the truck for several minutes, figuring at the least somepony would hear me. However after a good five minutes I decided to investigate. I went tent to tent, each one giving me a chill as I spotted a stone imprisoned pony. Finally reaching the last tent, I took a deep breath then yanked on the curtains and entered, gasping as I lay my sight upon the interior.

There was nothing, save a work bench and a little science lab do-hickey. “UGH! Where is she?!” I gasped, having not yet found Kianna. I stormed out of the tent and looked around, not once sensing her presence.

I made my way to the cargo plane's open rear cargo door. As I let myself inside, I covered my eye with a hand while I sighed. Kianna lay inside, sprawled out on the floor and turned completely to stone. 'How the hell'd they get her?' I wondered to myself as I crept past her.

This just didn't add up. 'Maybe I didn't ask Nightshade hard enough...' I thought to myself. 'HA! Nightmare Moon my ass. Bet she isn't even alive. Bet it was all just a lie. She played me like a damn fiddle!' I thought to myself.

Just as I was about to come to terms with that thought, I felt a trembling in the ground, like an earthquake rippling the planet's surface. Rushing back outside, I looked to the distance where an ominous dark blue light was shining up from the surface. It was almost like a fissure had been cracked open and was letting out some hellish creature from the underworld.

The ground continued to shake and tremble and I watched in fascination as a spindly tower was quickly erected, reaching over two hundred feet into the air, almost as tall as the Canterlot royal castle.

I looked in awe as my thoughts continued to wander. 'Maybe she wasn't lying...' I rushed back inside the cargo plane. 'Too bad this wasn't the gunship model... bah, wouldn't matter. I don't even have a gunner...' I kept thinking random thoughts as I began to take out a couple rifles from her stash.

The majority of her stash was cold war Soviet and American weapons, with only a few select weapons being WWII era or FN weaponry. I grabbed a dozen AKMs and stripped them all down, sorting through the selection for the best parts. Most of them were in pretty rough shape, a lot of the barrels being pitted or rusty from careless lack of maintenance.

Going through the firearms, I ended up grabbing another batch of AKMs just so I could find the finest quality parts. After the better part of an hour, I finally cobbled together a fine AKM that operated like butter. The action was smooth, the trigger pull was crisp and gun didn't look beat up.

I put the other guns back together in courtesy of the fact I was taking a freebie. I had a hunching suspicion it wouldn't matter in the end anyways, but just in case. As I was putting the other battered rifles away, I came across the sight of a rather rare firearm. I picked up the completely black rifle.

It's fairly unique and rather hideous muzzle break made me snicker as I closely observed the firearm. It's magazine was angled slightly to the side to allocate the needed space for the odd recoil system. Though of Russian design, it was rather futuristic in its own little world.

I removed the magazine and checked the load. Rocking the magazine back into the gun, I racked back on the bolt and charged the weapon. My thumb naturally pivoted the fire selector and flipped the gun into its infamous burst mode.

Aiming out the cargo door, I quickly tapped on the trigger several times, ripping off the entire magazine's capacity in breathtaking time. It felt as though the gun only fired a dozen or so times, but in reality it did double that.

Though an ugly gun... and a little more complicated than the Kalashnikov series, I decided to take the gun along with me. I grabbed several extra magazine's for each gun, along with extra ammunition for the AN-94. I already had the ammo for the AKM due to Evan's SKS habit.

I turned to Kianna and drew Belladonna's sights on her. “For the unspeakable things you've done...” I trailed off as my finger deterred on the trigger. As much as I should kill her... as much as I wanted to kill her... I also wanted her alive so I could finish her in proper combat. “One day... one day we'll have our battle, and when we do, the world will stop to watch...”

As I slung the rifles over my shoulders and went to leave, I caught sight of a somewhat... very novelty gun. A smile came across my face...

* * *

I parked Juggernaut to the side of the path and turned her off. This was as far as she could go. I grabbed the extremely heavy bag and slapped the bandolier across my chest before putting a big pack on my back. I stepped out of the truck, the bag and pack nearly yanked my entire body down to the ground. Sweet Celestia it was heavy.

I shut the door behind myself and looked to the bridge that led to the massive, newly erected, castle. “Nice digs...” I muttered to myself as I crossed the bridge in a calm fashion. The rickety board and rope bridge swayed to and fro as I made my way across.

As I neared the castle gates, I noticed the beautiful stained glass portraits that probably told some kind of story or was in honor of somepony. Crouching low, I pounced into the air, flying higher than I ever though possible and landing on a balcony perch of the castle.

Walking along, I neared the exterior of the glass portrait that double acted as a window. The portrait portrayed The Shadowbolts defeating my friend. A plain expression came across my face as I dropped the big bag to the floor and unzipped it.

Pulling out the extensively heavy M134 machine gun that had been crafted and customized for handheld use, I jammed a power cable into the gun, linking it to the power source on my back. The gun, the battery pack on my back and the bag of ammunition that ran to the gun through a feed belt, was probably bordering three hundred pounds. Goddess I could barely move. 'How did I make that jump?' I thought to myself, looking down to the impossible gap that I somehow was able to make, especially considering the massive bulwark of novelty crap I was carrying.

I gripped the front handle with my left and the joystick looking handle with my right. 'Ooooh, I feel like Arnold now... Or maybe Ventura...' I thought as I walked up to the window panel. Swinging the heavy gun barrels, I smashed apart the window and peered down to the throne room.

Below were wonderfully crafted statues that were painted. Each one stood across from another down a long carpeted path, each statue evenly spaced. I thumbed on the joystick, activating the spin sequence of the gun.

As the gun reached optimal speed, my index finger deterred on the trigger. I had about one thousand rounds of ammunition. At four thousand rounds per minute, that was about fifteen seconds of ammunition.

I leveled the gun and fired a quick burst at some stained glass across from me. The gun shook and vibrated in my hands, taking me by surprise. For an electronically operated gun that wasn't gas operated, it had some kick.

Setting myself into a better stance, I gripped the gun tightly and sprayed a wide arc across the throne room, smashing apart the wonderfully crafted glass panels. The constant muzzle flash unleashed a backlash of force that fluttered my trench coat flaps. The bright illumination produced by the buzzing gun lit up my features, the white skull on my shirt reflecting the light of the muzzle flash.

I held back on the trigger and mowed down several statues that burst into crumbling debris as they were struck with dozens of jacketed bullets. Bullets chewed bits of the floor up along with the carpet. Pieces of glass lay across the ground and chunks of stone debris from the statues cluttered across the ground.

I'd stop for brief seconds to move my point of aim, just to conserve the ammunition that extra bit longer. The gun continued to shake, recoil and vibrate in my hands. Each stream of of bullets chewed apart its target, spewing more and more debris across the once pristine castle floor. Within seconds, the gun ran dry and simply whirled loudly. I was nearly deaf.

'Huh... so much for that,' I thought as I tossed the gun aside along with the heavy battery pack.

Reaching into the bag, I retrieved the single shot M79 grenade launcher and pushed a live shell into the chamber. With a flick of my wrist, I latched shut the breach loaded gun before aiming it downrange with just one hand. 'Oh goddess, Evan would've loved to see this,' I thought to myself as I triggered the gun.

The recoil hurt my wrist, but I kept my stance. The grenade round was propelled down range and burst apart a stone statue. Thumbing the latch, I loaded another shell but this time fired between two statues, taking out two with one shot.

The statues burst apart and the lighter pieces were propelled over a dozen yards away. I kept the stone cold expressionless look on my face as I pumped another round into the chest of a statue. The grenade round burst apart the depiction of whom I presumed to be Nightmare Moon, blasting the pieces of her across the throne room. The explosions started to leave heated pieces of shrapnel in several places, some of which ignited the carpet and set it ablaze.

Looking to the throne, I loaded another shell and leveled the gun's sights on the throne chair. Firing the gun, I watched in satisfaction as the throne was blown to smithereens. However, despite my satisfaction, I kept my joy to myself, still keeping the expressionless look.

I dropped the grenade launcher beside the Gatling gun and hopped down through the busted window. Landing in a crouched position, I slowly stood up to my full height. A drop like that would've killed a regular person... but then again, this was a mystical world of magic and ponies so I wasn't about to ask why I could do what I'm now able to do.

“Hmm... quite an entrance,” spoke a voice. I causally turned to face the owner of the voice. I could make out a figure in the darkness. She, judging by the voice, was tall and rather slender. Wings were folded at her side and a pointy horn protruded from her head. Her eyes glowed white and her mane and tail were but a fuming mist in the darkness.

My thoughts escaped me as I was left slightly slack jawed. “Nightmare Moon.” My words were but a whisper yet somehow she heard them.

“Yes indeed. And here I was on the premonition that all of Celestia's subjects had been turned to stone. I even had to send my henchmare and her group after... you. But... you're not you, are you?” she asked.

I let a few mumbles leave my mouth. I was never really sure what to expect from Nightmare Moon, but she had a terrifying presence about her. Just being near her was... ominous. “How? How'd you do it?!” I ordered and she laughed.

“You're not really in the position to be making demands but... I'll offer a trade off. You answer my question and I'll answer yours.” Her offer was difficult, mostly because I didn't know how to answer it.

“I don't know. I'm not my friend, the one you sent your goons after... yet, I am in a way,” I replied.

She gave me a glare. “How is that so?” she asked.

“You first. I answered your question as best I could. Now, how did you do it?” I demanded and she laughed before speaking.

“I'm not satisfied with your answer. Tell me how it is that you're still alive. I felt it. Nopony else was left living. You were turned to stone but now... here you are standing before me,” she stated.

“I'm no more my friend than you are Luna,” I stated and she scowled angrily.

“I AM NOT LUNA! I AM NIGHTMARE MOON, GODDESS OF THE NIGHT! THE MARE IN THE MOON!” She shouted so loud it nearly shook the ground beneath me.

“I answered your question, now answer mine!” I demanded. She looked to me with a risen brow. Stepping forwards and out of the darkness, her features were illuminated under the moon's gaze.

Her eyes were no longer glowing and her pupils showed. Her fur was jet black and her frame was just as slender as it had been in the darkness. She was breath taking. I readied myself for the fight but she just laughed. “I am not interested in fighting you... at least, not yet.” She circled around me as I just stood there, stationary. “Hmm... indeed you are not your former self. You are... different. You are... stronger... faster... better,” she whispered the last part into my ear and I took a sharp inhale.

She walked around to my front side and smiled. “Very well... what shall I call you than?” she asked.

“Parker... Derreck Parker...” I replied valiantly.

She smiled. “Indeed... Well than Derreck... I suppose you answered more than one question, so I guess I owe you. As you may know I was destroyed by the elements of harmony, at least my entity was destroyed... Luna remained,” she snarled the last part before continuing.

“I found myself in the darkness of what mortals would consider death, banished for what would be eternity. However, as luck would have it, Celestia ordered her sister Luna to invade your dreams. A decision she lived to regret. During those years she spent with you in that war, her fear... the terror of what she saw began to consume her. I was recreated. A manifestation of that fear, slowly building up inside of her. A fear that followed her back to the real world. When she was told it was false, but a dream, it started to turn to anger and hatred and I was completed once again. Though I made diligent to separate myself from Luna so that I would not be hindered by a second mind once again. Finally I will forever and fully be Nightmare Moon. No longer will I conflict with a second entity. Luna was the first...” she told me.

“I've heard of weirder circumstances...” I arched my brow. “So... how'd you do it? The ponies to stone?” I asked.

“I once... felt, the energy of another who nearly brought Equestria to its knees. He had a dark power that could ensnare you into your worst fears, make it feel like reality itself. I learned and harnessed that great power for myself, and turned it into something much darker. I could bring myself to a pony's thoughts, almost like a daydream, and put you through your worst fears. If that fear proved true, your body would turn to stone, much like the powerful stare of a cockatrice. However, your... friend, was the only one in all Equestria not to give into his fears mentally. His willpower was immense. He needed to be physically coaxed into his fears, which is where my henchmare and her group came in handy. So you see? It was the dreams, the nightmares, that turned everypony to stone.” I stood there for a moment and took it all in.

“The legends said you were angry because everypony loved the day... and not the night. So why enslave everypony into stone statues? Now there's nopony around...” I mentioned.

“It was Luna's dream! Her derailed vision to have ponies love the night. I wished to conquer and rule all of Equestria!” She boomed.

“But why rule something if there's nothing to rule?” I asked and she shot me a glare.

“I will not be bested by anypony. The last time I underestimated these puny foals, I was defeated. This time will be perfect. Nothing will stop me if there's nothing to be stopped by!” She proclaimed. I stepped towards her.

“Hmph... well, you disregarded the most dangerous factor of all,” I stated and she looked to me with a curious stare.

“And what would that be?” she asked.

“Me!” I stated in a deep voice. She laughed and cackled, almost as if it were a joke.

“Oh please! What humor. I think I shall keep you around as my jester. I never knew humor could be so exhilarating!” she howled in laughter. I widened my stance and grunted, my muscles flexing and bulging to new sizes. I let out a prolonged grunt as my body was covered in a dark blue glow, a powerful aura of equal color flashing around me.

“Indeed... an interesting trick. However, you've just sealed your fate. I could've thought of a million uses for you, some of which you may have even enjoyed. But, if this is the path you choose, I will grant you the death you obviously wish for!” She shouted as she zipped forwards at blinding speeds.

Jumping into the air, she performed a flip and drove a kick into the side of my neck. I kept my stance rigid and held my ground. The force transmitted itself through my nearly stationary body and into the ground, creating a gaping pit beneath me. She gasped as her eyes went wide.

“Th-that... that should have killed you!” she snarled. Her body was motionless, still in the posture of kicking the side of my neck. I slowly reached up and grabbed her leg.

“The key word there is 'should'.” I pivoted, still holding her leg as I swung her body and slammed her into the ground, creating another crater in the floor. I released her leg and stepped back. “You underestimate your opponents,” I told her as she stood back up to her full height.

“You are still no match for me!” Lowering her stance, her horn glowed and emitted a powerful blast that sent me hurtling through the air. Mid flight, I rearranged my body and cupped my hands together, palms facing her.

A bright radiance shone in my palms, the illuminating glow shining through the cracks between my fingers. With fierce recoil, the energy blasted towards Nightmare and collided perfectly square with her chest.

The resulting eruption shook the throne room. I flipped in the air and landed on my feet, still sliding backwards on the tips of my feet. Coming to a stop, I looked to the smoldering cloud where my blast had struck Nightmare.

Out of the corner of my vision, even with one eye bundled up beneath an eye patch, I caught glimpse of a figure blurring towards me. I brought my forearm up in a defensive position and blocked the mare's strike.

She let out a stifled gasp as I blocked her attack perfectly. “You... you...”

“Me?” I asked innocently as I used my free hand to plow a punch into her chest and send her crashing through a wall. I felt a sensation wash over me as the moon shone upon my body. I felt as though my body's strength, speed and overall power was boosted dramatically.

I grunted as my body flexed further. My muscles didn't really enlarge any further but grew incredibly tense, veins bulging from beneath my skin. My powerful aura began to flush outwards rather than stream parallel with my figure.

The increased power output from my aura blew off my eye patch and I could physically feel my eye change. My pupil came into view and my vision was enhanced. I could see everything as though it was daytime yet again. As though the very sun itself was shining upon me.

I looked to the moon. It was as though it was shining brighter than the sun itself. Looking to the moon, I tried to let out a powerful roar that ended up becoming a howl. The claws that resided inside my arm extended out from between my knuckles like they always did.

Blood dripped down my hands as I turned to face Nightmare Moon whom was emerging from the rubble. “You'll pay for that!” she shouted, charging forwards and plowing into me with great force. She slammed my body through several walls before releasing me and letting me come to a crashing stop against a stone pillar.

I groaned as I came to my feet. “These will be your last moments... enjoy them!” she laughed as she flew forwards for another strike. I dodged to the side and drove a punch right up into her gut, my opposing force stopping her dead in flight. Her breath was taken away as she wheezed, the wind knocked out of lungs from the abrupt and rather violent stop.

I jumped into a flip and drove a kick into her back, slamming her into the ground before further crushing her into the crater as I drove my feet into her back rather brutishly. Stepping off her, I knelt down. “I'm still here...” I taunted.

“NOT FOR LONG!” She boomed, spinning on the ground and kicking my feet out from under me. Leaping into the air, she spun and flew down into my chest with all fours, crushing me into the unforgiving floor. I clenched my eyes shut as I grimaced painfully.

I felt her breath on my cheeks as she breathed calmly. I managed to crack my eyes open enough to see her. She had a devilish smile splayed across her face. “Hurt?” she asked before head butting me with extreme force. The power behind her strike had enough strength to crash me through the floor and slam my body into the depths below.

I crashed with enough momentum leftover to leave yet another cavity in the ground. I went to stand but she piled into me, crashing me through floor after floor after floor until I was finally driven into the planet's surface.

She went to strike me while I was down but I placed my palm to her gut and fired an energy blast that sent her catapulting into the air, a fuming trail of smoke following her path. I rolled backwards and to my feet, standing in a defensive position. We had a stand off briefly and I decided it was time to get serious. I took a moment to remove the trench coat and skull shirt, revealing my raw physique.

Deciding to take to the offensive, I darted forwards but came to a sudden stop as Nightmare Moon flew into me, lodging her horn through my gut. I gasped with a spurt of blood and she withdrew her horn.

Glowing brightly, and spurting globs of pure energy, her horn flashed and an eruption of magic blistered into me. The blast nearly tore my body apart. I could feel the heat burning my skin as it drove me back.

As the blast stopped I found myself barely able to stand. I had my eyes clenched shut but I could still feel my skin... feel myself bleeding. Not badly but still enough to trickle down my sides.

I spotted her charging for another strike and followed her lead. We both charged into each other and delivered a powerful strike to the other's cheek. Her punch was enough to cock my head to the side, but I could feel that my strike did the same to her.

Pushing against her strength, I cocked my head back towards her and smiled before booting her hard in the gut and sending her airborne. Extending my opened hand, a fury of energy blasts left my palm, zooming towards Nightmare Moon. With utmost precision and speed she managed to dodge every single blast.

“Your aim could use great improvement,” she mentioned and I smiled.

“So could your perception,” I countered back. She blinked, unsure of what I had meant, before looking around herself. Every single blast floated nearby, glowing ominously. I clenched my fist shut and as I did so, every orb of energy connected with Nightmare, resulting in a massive explosion.

Flying out from the explosion in a furious blur, the mare zipped towards me, horn glowing brightly. As she neared, she lowered her horn. I extended my hand once again, palm facing her. As she flew within a few feet of my position we both fired our respective attack that collided with with the other's.

The explosive force knocked us both back and spread us further apart. Clenching my fists, I charged forwards, as I knew she was undoubtedly doing as well. We met in the smoldering smoke and connected strikes with one another, knocking ourselves away yet again.

As I readied myself for another attack, a fury of energy shots flew at me. I returned fire with my own magical blasts. I had no idea where I was firing and some of our shots collided, resulting in an explosion that further masked our positions. Other shots missed our target completely and went off to cause further destruction to the structural integrity of the castle.

After a few brief moments both of us ceased fire. Her voice echoed through the building smoke. “You are definitely stronger than I first thought,” she commented. I crept through the smoke with a cautious pace. I couldn't sense her presence... she was probably sneaking around as well.

“You are a lot prettier than I thought,” I commented and I could hear her laugh.

“Trying to flirt with me in an attempt to have me spare your life?” she laughed.

“No... just speaking my mind freely. I was always fascinated by your chess piece appearance when Evan would play with his friend, Derpy.” The smoke didn't let up, and I wondered if perhaps we had started a fire. “I always thought you were kind of pretty... just never expected anypony to be this pretty.”

“I could swear you are trying to flirt with me,” she replied and I just chuckled, still making my way through the darkness.

“Maybe I am... or maybe I'm just wondering why it is a pony with your beauty chose such a dark path,” I replied, leaning up against a vertical surface that felt like stone. I heard her voice reply back.

“Perhaps you don't understand that very few ponies appreciate the beauty of night. They feel frightened and threatened by the darkness of eternal night,” she replied.

“Hmm... or maybe you don't understand the damage caused by such actions... without the sun's natural vitamins, plants start to die. Global climate change further kills off several other species. With temperatures declining further, the water starts to freeze and life further starts to decrease. The ecosystem would start to end on a planet that is so dependent upon the sun,” I told her.

“So you'd rather the day than night?” she asked and I smirked.

“No. As much as the planet depends upon the sun, it also requires the love of the moon. The moon controls the tides of the ocean. The darkness it brings allows nocturnal creatures to roam freely. The natural cycle of day and night is vital to the continuation of the living ecosystem. Without one, there cannot be the other...” I replied.

There was a long silence, and I had hinting suspicion we both knew the other was on the opposite side of the stone wall we were both leaning up against as we spoke. Breaking the silence, Nightmare Moon spoke. “So which are you? Day or night?” she asked.

“The moon gives me strength. It fills my body with a power I have yet to understand. With the night comes a darkness others cannot rightly see past, yet I can see as though it were brighter than the day sky.” I stood in silence and it was as though I could feel her smile.

“So in a way... I give you strength,” she commented and I chuckled lightly.

“I suppose if that's the way you like to look at it... yes. You give me strength,” I replied. There was a long silence that was quite peaceful. I looked to the moon and it was as though I could feel her looking back to me, like the moon was a mirror, reflecting her gaze back at me and vice-versa.

In that time of peace the smoke cleared. Nightmare spoke up. “Well... I suppose it's time to get back to it,” she suggested and I nodded.

“It's the way it has to be,” I replied back, propelling myself off the stone wall and firing an energy blast at it. Nightmare did the same and the resulting fiery explosions shook the castle. We both flew into the air, blasting several shots at one another in a fury of motion.

A lone shot came right at me. I stopped and cocked back my right hand before swatting it away like a fly. Several dozen more orbs of energy blasted towards me. In a blur, my hands moved with grace, swatting away each shot, the attacks redirected to the ground and blasting more craters into the surface.

“Hmm... impressive,” she praised and I nodded.

“I'm full of surprises,” I replied and she smiled.

“Is that so?” she asked as her horn glowed brilliantly, her body tensing. “In that case... SURPRISE ME!” She boomed, firing a large powerful beam of energy at me. I widened my stance and held my ground. As the beam neared me I held out both hands and caught the strike with my palms. The blast had enough force to plummet me to the ground but I still held strong, never once letting the blast leave my hands.

The energy had enough force to skid my rigid frame backwards but I never let up, my feet even digging a trench into the ground. Cocking my arms at the elbows, I exerted all the power I had and forced the blast back towards Nightmare.

Cocking my right arm all the way back, I swung as though to punch, tossing a powerful energy shot into the back of her own blast, sending it hurtling even fast towards her and not giving her a chance to react.

The explosion was immense and made me cover my face with my arms. As the explosion settled I looked upwards, arms falling to my sides. Nightmare fell from the air, smoking profusely. Launching myself into the air at great speeds, I caught her and brought her soundly back to the ground. Grunting to herself, she looked up at me with a confused expression.

“Surprise,” I replied before setting her back to all fours and readying myself in a combat stance. Our brows both furrowed with anger and we launched ourselves at each other, hammering a fury of blazing fast punches into the other. The resulting kinetic energy sent shock waves throughout the castle, even blowing away debris near our fight.

Each strike from her was like hell and the few minutes that our furious punching battle lasted felt like eternity. We both stopped and staggered back from one another, brutalized by our foolish attempt to simply over power the other in a show of pure strength and endurance.

Although my healing factor kicked in, the lingering sting of pain from our battle rested in my body. I could still feel every place she'd struck. “If it's the moon that gives you power...” she trailed off as the moon slowly left the skies, leaving the planet in near complete darkness. I felt my body weaken and I nearly fell to my knees. Her eyes lit up in an ominous glow, the only real source of light for the time being. Even in my weakened state however, I could sense that the removal of the moon's presence had also taken a toll on her as well.

“Let's see how you fare now!” she boomed, charging at me and plowing my body through the walls of the castle, launching my body outside. I rolled and tumbled along the ground but soon caught my footing and propelled myself into the air.

I let my inner hatred begin to simmer. A dark fiery red glow began to encase my body. My pupil yet again shifted and was now left in a vertical slant as the iris of my damaged eye turned hellish red. I flexed, my body gaining muscle mass. The flushing power aura returned but this time with a red color scheme similar to that of my damaged eye. Red electrical currents began to stream around my body. Everything else seemed to fade away and my attention was drawn purely to Nightmare Moon, my every sense focused to her.

I was hardly half as strong as I was before, but I would make up for that loss of power with the burning fury inside of me. Besides, she had lost a majority of her power as well. “The moon isn't the only place I draw power from!” I shouted out as I let the fury inside of me boil over.

I thrust my hands straight up, unleashing all my hatred and rage. A nova of red energy began to form above the palms of my hands, almost like a small sun. The omitted heat from it nearly burned my hands, but I refrained from cringing and simply kept feeding my anger into the ball of fury.

Thunder crackled in the background, along with the constant flash of lightning. Taking my left hand away, I lurched my body forwards and thrust my right hand downwards, as though to throw a ball. My swing directed the mighty ball of fury and it slammed down into Nightmare, crushing her into the planet and erupting violently.

The blinding flash of the eruption made me cringe and the concussive force struck me as well. I was hit by the blast of my own strike, several burns and wounds scattering across my body.

In the aftermath of the explosion, I found myself laying on the ground flat on my back. I felt my healing factor start to kick in.

I stood up and looked at my left arm which was snapped the wrong way. Biting down on my lower lip, I grabbed my left forearm with my good hand and yanked it back into place with a loud groan of pain.

I felt the smooth embrace of the moon's gaze once more. My dark hellish aura left and was replaced by my cool moon blue aura, along with my pupil and iris. Nightmare Moon casually strode out from the ravaged and smoldering castle. “Perhaps I once again underestimated you,” she commented in an appraising tone.

“Like I said... lots of surprises.” I took a combat ready stance and she just laughed.

“HA! Do you really think you stand a chance against me? You silly foal!” she laughed and began to charge at me. In an instant my mind focused and I was teleported directly in front of the still charging mare. She gasped in shock as my fist drove itself into her gut. As she doubled over mid flight, I swiftly brought my right arm up high and drove my elbow into her back, slamming her into the ground.

Leaping back I let out a howl of rage, the ground beneath us vibrating as my inner self began to change. My muscles flexed and toned themselves accordingly. Veins along my arms and legs bulged as the powerful aura around me widened out even further, quickly accompanied by an electrical blue static that surrounded my body.

I could feel my body shaking, barely able to contain the new found strength I had attained. Nightmare Moon smirked with a chuckle. “I should keep you around. Who knows what other things you can do to amuse me,” she laughed before charging full speed towards me.

In an instant I closed the gap between us and drove a knee into her chest, knocking the wind out of her. With a wildly hard punch, I sent her hurtling backwards through the air. I zipped along faster than the eye could see and came up behind her, clenching both hands together and slamming them into her body, abruptly changing her flight path and sending her crashing straight down into the ground below.

Floating down, I postured myself accordingly nearby. She staggered to her hooves and looked over to me with a scowl. “Why you! I'm gonna kill you for sure now!” She charged at me, unleashing a fury of punches, kicks, elbows and energy blasts.

I followed suit and we both unloaded into each other with everything we had, each getting glorious shots upon the other. Leaping back from the proverbial ring, she lowered her horn and fired a mighty blast into my gut that sent me hurtling back.

Flipping several times in the air, I gained my posture and fired back but she dodged the blast with ease and slammed into me with immense force. She crashed our bodies back into the castle and down several more floors.

Squirming out from her grip I pounded several punches into her sides before leaping back and clenching my right fist obscenely hard. A bright blue glow encased my right forearm and I began to growl and snarl like a wild beast.

Charging forwards, I leapt into the air and thrust my right fist towards Nightmare Moon. The embodiment of the upper half of a wolf charged out, a stream of energy connecting it to my arm.

The wolf pierced straight through Nightmare's chest then looped around and engulfed her within it's jaws, erupting slightly afterwards in a bright flash. The strike had taken a lot out of me and I fell to my knees with a gasp.

Without much warning, Nightmare Moon rushed forwards and tackled me yet again through the floors of the castle, crashing me down to ground level. Reaching deep for strength, I booted her off my body.

I looked away, seeing the moon shine down through another hole we had put in the floors. The moon's illumination sparkled upon a beautiful sword that was jammed into the broadside of a boulder. I crawled over, groaning painfully as I did so. Even with my healing factor kicking in, I was still feeling a bit tender.

The blade, what little I could see of it, was wonderfully crafted though it was strange. It was a dual edged blade but in the middle it was separated into two color schemes.

One side was bright and had the glossy look of stainless steel, while the other side was dark blue like Nightmare's mane. The handle was a good two feet long but at the base it had four claws holding a yin yang orb. But this yin yang wasn't quite like the one from where I came from.

Rather than black and white it was blue and white, the dot inside the white half being that of Luna's cutie mark, the other dot inside the blue half being Celestia's. I rested my body against the firmly jammed sword, my body's weight all resting on the handle yet never moving it an inch. I made diligent not to touch the blade edges as they looked dangerously sharp.

“Don't even try it,” Nightmare laughed. I opened my eyes weakly to see her slowly trotting towards me. “That is the legendary Shadow Blade, forged from Shadow Steel. The strongest and most durable material known to ponies. That blade is made from the same material my armor is made from, but that sword was specially enchanted by Celestia and Luna together. Only a pony who is pure of heart and loyal to the moon may carry that blade. Only Luna was ever able to wield that sword,” she mentioned.

With great strength I heaved on the handle but it didn't even budge or wiggle. I grunted and groaned, even trying to pull it side to side to loosen it. But alas, it didn't give even a millimeter. The mare laughed at my futile attempts.

I collapsed, gasping for air as my whole body ached in pain, begging for me to stop. My eyes fluttered open and in the reflection of the blade, I saw the innocent smiling face of my friend. That smile... the one I'd never see again. My eyes squinted as my brows furrowed. His reflection beamed off the shiny part of the blade, while my own image reflected off the darker side. As I gripped the sword, I swear I could see the ghostly image of my friend standing on the opposite side of the sword, also gripping the handle.

The yin yang orb glowed brightly as did the blade. My hands clenched and without much effort I yanked on the handle, as did the ghostly image of Evan, and together we freed the blade that had sat here for over millennium. A rippling shaking in the ground rocked the remainder of the castle ruins as I brought the blade to bear.

Clenching even harder against the handle, the sword stormed with energy, the blade glowing blue with a mist similar to Luna's mane. Nightmare gasped in disbelief as she staggered back. “Im... impossible!” she gasped. I gripped harder on the sword, a powerful aura blistering outwards from the sword. A crater grew beneath my feet as I stood there wielding the mighty blade. I stood to my full height, the Shadow Blade gleaming in my grip. The blade itself nearly stood an additional six feet from the hilt, making the sword eight feet in total and taller than me.

I looked to her with a glare, then propelled myself towards her at blazing speeds, a flaming trail of electricity following me. I cocked back hard with the sword and swung it with all my might. The momentum alone from my strike could kill a pony.

As the blade struck her armor vicious sparks of lightning shot out from the collision while her shadow armor erupted into thousands of shards. The resulting force of the blow knocked us both back, hurtling us through the air. I lay on my back, barely able to cock my head up to see Nightmare Moon staggering painfully to her hooves. I looked to see the blade laying on the ground a few dozen feet away. At first I contemplated rushing to retrieve it but a warmth at the side of my thigh convinced me otherwise. I reached to the side of my leg and gripped the pearl handle of Belladonna.

Out of the corner of my vision I could see her glowing brightly. Drawing the pistol out, I gained a bead on Nightmare Moon. The golden inscriptions along Belladonna's side began to shine. 'Belladonna' and 'Thy lord shall set thee free'. The first shot recoiled hard in my grip and the shot slammed into Nightmare's shoulder, staggering her back as blood seeped from the wound.

I fired again, striking the broadside of her chest. Again into her chest followed by another. The forth shot struck her other shoulder. Time seemed to slow and focus for me. My aim went high on her chest and I pumped two nearly consecutive shots, both hammering their mark with immense force.

The kick was enough to pull her up to her hindlegs. My aim went low and to her exposed belly. Firing once more, I was awarded with the sight of a penetrating shot that kicked her onto her back with a painful scream.

Belladonna's slide cocked back and locked. She was empty. With a groan of pain I managed to load another magazine into Belladonna then crawl over to Nightmare Moon whom lay in a widening pool of her own blood. She gasped and gagged, blood coming up through her mouth as she withered there, gaping wounds all over her body. I was surprised she was still alive.

I crawled my upper half onto her chest and pressed the barrel of Belladonna between her eyes. “I... win!” I grunted and Nightmare Moon looked directly into my eyes. My finger began to squeeze back on the dangerously crisp trigger. As I looked into her eyes, I stopped.

I lay there for a moment before letting the handgun slip from my grip. My right hand traveled down her body, feeling the curvature of her body, every texture to her fur. My hand stopped at the wound on her belly and I gently pressed down.

She gasped in further pain and bit her lip. “What are you doing?! GET IT OVER WITH ALREADY!” she yelled, begging for death. I felt my own energy begin to drain, and could feel the gaping wounds on her body seal shut. I looked into her eyes with a fiery gaze.

“I... beat... you...” I whispered before collapsing into darkness...

* * *

I felt the blissful cool feeling of the moon shining upon my body. My wounds began to seal though the soreness still remained. I felt enough life return to my body that I was able to open my eyes, finding myself staring into the stars and at the full moon, though my left eye was now shrouded in a foggy blur. Closing my left eye, I sighed.

On my chest lay Belladonna, not shining anymore but still having her regular glistening look. With what little strength I had, I grabbed the hand cannon and put her back into her holster. A voice startled me, but I didn't have enough power to act startled.

“Why did you do it?” she asked and I sighed.

“Even if I killed you, I doubt it would bring my friends back. Even if I killed you, I doubt the sun would come back. Even if I killed you... who's to say you won't just come back again. What's the point of killing you if it doesn't change anything? If I defeat you but leave you alive... you have to live eternity alone knowing you were bested, and there's nothing you can do to redeem yourself. Eternity knowing you'll always be second best. And that is the greatest punishment of all,” I said groggily. A crumpled pile of clothes was dropped beside me. It was my trench coat, skull shirt and eye patch.

“I found them in the rubble...” she trailed off. I sensed her presence get close to me, along with the rustling sound of her laying down.

She was resting right beside me, looking healthy and refreshed which was a whole lot better than what I undoubtedly looked like. Very slowly, I felt life start to return to all parts of my body. “How did you beat me? You were finished then... you just... the Shadow Blade does not give you strength nor power yet you managed to...” she trailed off and I managed a weak shrug.

“Determination... the love I have for my friends drives me to unthinkable abilities.” I continued to just lay there, staring at the moon. After a long silent while, I tilted my head so I was looking at her. Her helmet and armor were gone, destroyed by Shadow Blade, letting her mane flow freely and showing off her natural beauty. “You're very beautiful...” I mentioned.

She looked to me with a blush. Before she could say much, I spoke my mind. “I just... thought I'd say that. It's true,” I mentioned before flopping my head back and facing the stars once more.

“I can change things back... release everypony from their stone imprisonment,” she mentioned.

“And why would you do something like that?” I asked, still as weak as ever.

“Maybe I just feel like it,” she said mockingly.

“Smart ass...” I snickered. I could hear her sigh.

“When you... did what you did, I realized no matter how powerful I become, friendship... love... somehow, someway, it will always triumph over my power of hatred and anger. When you gave up what little life you had left to save me it... I lost the will to fight. How could it be that somepony... someone, whose power trumps over my own, would be so caring that he'd give what little he had left to a dying mare that threatened to destroy everything he held dear. It... destroyed me... how can... I just... you've beaten the fight out of me. I've lost.”

I lay there, her words not only sinking into me but into herself. “That's kinda what I was hoping would happen. I mean... I wasn't expecting to be alive at this point to hear it...” I trailed off.

“If I do this, than you won't be. You'll be back to the way you were before. A mere second. A slave to a master. Are you truly that selfless that you'd give up your freedom for another?” she asked. I didn't answer and that was all she needed.

“Derreck?” she asked and I looked towards her. She moved over and leaned her upper body over mine. “I guess I just wanted to...” she trailed off and placed her lips to mine. Our eyes closed as we embraced in the moment. Her lips were soft, wet... sensual.

Though most of my mind was focused on the kiss, in the back of my mind I could sense the others coming back, their stone imprisonment vanquished. The kiss ended too soon and she leaned back, still over top of me and looking down with those dreamy eyes of hers. 'Ha! Dreamy. The mare who just about killed me I'm calling dreamy... what next?'

“Wanted to do that,” she said, finishing the sentence she started before the kiss. “I'll give you a parting gift so I can always be with you in spirit... if you'd like,” she offered but didn't quite tell me what it was. I nodded and she placed her horn to my head. I felt a tingly sensation course through my body but it was rather brief and I wasn't sure what it did. Taking her horn away, she blinked away a tear before speaking.

“By daybreak you'll change back. After that everything will return to normal. When everypony returns, Luna will have no recognition of the dream she endured with you. I have kept those memories for myself... as a souvenir I suppose. But before that happens I guess there's one last thing you have to do...” she trailed off and I blinked. Her horn glowed and Belladonna was placed in my hand. Before I could speak it was levitated upwards and she placed the barrel near the center of her chest, pointed to wear her heart would be.

“What?!” I gasped.

“Face it. No matter what happens ponies will never except me into their community. It took them long enough to except Luna. Discord never really tried anything drastic and world shattering yet some still question his alliegence... no, this world isn't for me. Ponies wouldn't understand like you have.” She had a very saddened expression across her face. With teary eyes, she looked to me. “Besides, in the short time we've spent together, I've lived a lifetime's worth. And for that I thank you, Derreck Parker. But it's time...”

* * *

Evan's perspective...

I awoke with a yawn then gasped, jumping out of bed and feeling myself. Last I remembered I had... I was fighting... dark pegasi... the fountain...

Without much thought I rushed upstairs and nearly collided with my mother. We both started sputtering out random gibberish before stopping. I spoke first. “Uhh... you first,” I replied and Twilight grabbed me.

“Oh Evan, I had a horrible, terrible, awful dream that you disowned me and left, along with all my friends. Even Celestia said I was a disgrace and stripped my title away, saying all my achievements were for nothing,” she said shakily.

'Was my... was it a dream?' I asked myself. As I thought about it, I felt really heavy. Not in just a mental way but physically. I literally felt like I weighed a good three hundred and fifty, maybe four hundred pounds.

“What about you?” she asked, breaking my thoughts. I shook my head, brushing away the wonder about my weight.

“I... I... uhh...” I had no idea how to explain it. I mean... stone imprisonment, Shadowbolts... something about a sword... instead I just hugged her tightly. “I just wanted to say I love you,” I told her heartily. She was a little taken aback by the rather strange approach, considering I was rushing frantically just moments ago, but soon embraced the hug.

Leaning back from the hug, I smiled. “I just never want to disappoint you-” I began before being abruptly cut off by Lassie who crashed into us in a rushed scurry, knocking us all over.

“You guys wouldn't believe the crazy ass dream I just had!”

Author's Note

Yeah, sorry about the weight guys. My internet went down and I was going to post this Saturday night but then I got caught up in this problem with a friend who came over to my place in his parent's Sante Fe and crashed it (At which point is when I found out it belonged to his parents and he wasn't supposed to be driving it), which is somehow now backlashing on me? Dunno, idiotic people I guess.
Check it out...

Chapter 53

'This is the life worth living...'

I lay in my bed, restless as ever. I wasn't sure what it was but something was keeping me up. Perhaps the heat?

It was getting very hot out as of late but nothing that should bother me, especially living in the basement. I rolled over to my left side, laid for a few minutes before turning over to my other side. I continued back and forth for another hour before resting flat on my back with a disgruntled sigh.

With a roll of my eyes I looked to my watch, the one Flim and Flam had made me. I clicked the illumination button and the clock readout to me that it was nearly midnight.

I groaned and rolled onto my stomach, pushing my face into the warm pillow. Getting up to my knees with a sigh, I fluffed my pillow and tried again, alas to no avail. Another irritable groan left my mouth. My body was exhausted yet I couldn't get to sleep.

I rubbed my eyes, my damaged eye not covered at the moment. It was too dark to see much anyways. With a yawn, I sat up and got out of bed. 'Maybe a drink of water will help...'

I stumbled my way towards where I figured the staircase was but ended up bumping into a wall. “Noooh... oh... uhm...” I mumbled groggily as I began feeling my way along the wall. “Stairs... somewhere... gotta be...” I continued to mumble to myself as my hands felt along the texture of the wall. It felt... different.

After a minute of walking along the wall I thought to myself. “I don't remember the wall being this long...”

There was a thumping in my head, as though everything was going hazy on me. I staggered back, holding my head with both hands. My vision blurred into focus and a dimming light began to flicker on in the middle of the room, hanging down from the roof and supported solely by the electrical wires.

Nothing was right. The room was empty and there was no staircase. The room, for the most part, was just square. There were scribbles on the walls, deeply engraved, that bled black liquid. My jaw dropped as my heart began to thump. There was one door... it was chained and dead bolted shut. The chains looked heavy, like something from a port anchor. Written on the door was 'No way out'.

I swallowed hard and a shiver went down my back as a ghostly groaning echoed in the room. Something started to grow along the walls, almost like veins. They were dark red, almost black. The walls began to ooze more of that black liquid as the cracks spider webbed across the wall, ceiling and floor. I tried to hop out of the way but soon found that impossible. A gasp left my mouth as one of the veiny cracks went under my foot but soon found it had no affect on me. “Whew...” I wheezed, wiping a film of sweat from my forehead.

Just as I thought I was okay I noticed something on the wall. It was like a... a face. Being stupidly curious, I stepped forwards to inspect it closer. As I got close a ghastly groan echoed through the room and the face pushed out of the wall, black liquid drooling out where the disfigured... pony thing, emerged. Its cheek was rotten and eyes were missing. Deep red splits around the eye sockets gave it a horrifying look. It continued to howl out it's groan as the front hooves emerged, strings of slim connecting it to the wall.

With a gasp I tried to backpedal but tripped and fell on my arse. The beast emerging from the wall squirmed and thrashed, suddenly breaking free from an apparent restraint and crashing down the the ground. Its lower half had been severed off, along with part of its right foreleg, though it obviously didn't hinder the creature as it somehow levitated into the air.

My breath was taken away as its face turned to me, the demon creature slowly hovering towards me as it groaned out its creepy vocal notes.

I kept crawling back but one of my hands slipped a little too much and I fell flat to my back, the creature now nearly upon me. Just as all seemed lost, a deafening roar boomed inside the room and a large mass piled the vile creature to the ground.

“HE'S MINE!” Derreck boomed, letting out a second roar directly into the face of the creature, viscous canine teeth gleaming like gems. Cocking back his right fist, three boney claws emerged from between his knuckles and he slashed low, butchering the head clean off the ghostly pony thing.

Black liquid, looking almost like oil and having the sticky viscosity to match, splattered across the floor, even smudging my friend's face. I let out a relieved sigh and went to stand but no sooner had I, the floor beneath me seemed to swallow me up. The floor seemed to stretch downwards, dragging me down as though it was an opening portal. I tried to grab at something but to no avail.

Beasts, like the one that had emerged from the wall, grabbed at my legs and dragged me down further into a hellish red glow. I let out a petrified scream and scratched at the floor, trying to grip anything. Just as all seemed lost and I was yanked down into the hellish abyss, a thick palm grabbed my wrist, and I grabbed his.

An electrifying current zapped through my body and burst the zombie pony things off my body with a burst of dark blue lightning. I looked into Derreck's eyes, as he did mine. With a deep voice he spoke. “I'll always catch you when you fall, brother...”

With that he swung my body upwards and into the darkness above...

* * *

I gasped, thrashing up but something soft and furry pressed to my chest. “Sssh, easy...” cooed a gentle voice. “You're alright. It was just a nightmare,” whispered a soft and easing voice. Though it was dark, the night moon shone through my window and dimly illuminated the area.

“Mum?” I gasped though rather than a verbal answer, I felt her nuzzle into my neck.

“Sssh, quiet now. I'm here. Everything'll be alright. Just lay back...” Her voice was settling and put me to rest. Before I knew it, I was fast asleep...

* * *

My eyes gently fluttered opened as the sun poured it's rays upon me through my window. The hair along my arm prickled up, almost like flowers turning to catch the sun.

I looked to my watch. It was late morning, almost ten. A Friday. It was now the 25th of July. Almost two weeks since my birthday had passed and since then nothing had really come up. Working for Applejack and fooling around with Lassie and the Cutie Mark Crusaders, not much else to speak of. Twilight had tried teaching me basic levitation a few times but to no success. I just didn't understand how... but who needs levitation when one can do cooler stuff like control the nearby wind, launch magical energy blasts and teleport?

I heard a voice murmer from behind me while a pair of hooves wrapped around my waist. “Morning sleepyhead, sleep well?” she asked and I rose a brow.

“Ah dunno... had a bad dream early in the night,” I replied, vaguely remembering the horror as I slipped on my eye patch.

“How bout the rest of the night?” she asked and I shrugged. “Think of anything... particular?” she asked. I was about to answer but instead gasped as her hoof brushed against my morning erection. I wasn't even wearing my boxer briefs. I... I always wore boxers to bed, what happened?

“Mmm... someone slept well,” she whispered into my ear, breathing on the back of my neck before licking up the side. My back lurched forwards. “Huh, interesting. So that does work... I'll have to write this down...” she commented, probably to herself.

“Huh?” I asked back but was answered as she stroked her hoof down my length. “Uhh, mom!” I moaned but she just giggled.

“Relax. Spike said he was going out today, remember?” she reminded me but that still didn't exactly settle me. For somepony who's generally timid, brainy and docile, she can grow quite the appetite sometimes.

She rolled me to my back and hefted herself atop of me. My hands naturally glided themselves along her curves. Finding her flanks, I gave a squeeze right where her cutie marks were, eliciting a moan from her.

She lowered herself down, pressing my erection down and onto my stomach, then began to rub her slick moist folds along the underside of my length. She was soaked!

Her juices quickly coated my rod and she raised herself back up, allowing my cock to spring back to its full height. In one fluid motion she impaled herself on me, getting a shocked gasp from us both.

It always filled me with a sense of guilt, more so when we first started doing this. I mean... having sexual intercourse with my mother probably wasn't acceptable by Equestrian standards... but the intimate bond and pleasure it brought started to outweigh the guilt. We spoke of it sometimes but usually it resorted in us rutting and never went further than just bringing it up.

It would be a complete an utter lie to say it felt good having sex with my mother... it felt amazing.

She ground her hips into mine, completely engorging my cock into her depths. Slimy fluids seeped out the corners of her snatch, oozing down onto my lap as she rocked back and forth, moaning loudly. “Mmm... ooOOoooh, yesss, right there!” she whined out.

I felt myself deep inside of her, twitching. The thought of release was already burning into my mind. I imagined myself plunging deep into her canal and letting a torrent of spunk jet into her, like I had so many times before. But not right now. I wanted to make this last.

A thought quickly zipped through my mind, wondering what others would think... heh, they'd probably think we were crazy. They wouldn't understand. How could they? I don't even understand it.

Twilight began to bounce up and down on my shaft, slopping sounds echoing into the room. I felt her insides start to clasp against me, increasing the unbelievable feeling that was driving me into a bliss.

As she reached her first of what was undoubtedly going to be many orgasms, she leaned down and planted her wet, soft lips to mine, embracing me into a kiss. Her hips kept moving, driving me further down the path to my own orgasm. My hands moved towards her belly and began to play her her perky nipples, making her moan deep into my throat.

Before I knew exactly what was happening, a soft tongue licked up the underside of my shaft and around Twilight's folds. The two of us screamed in shock and jumped back, my cock slurping out of my mother.

We both looked down to the bottom of the bed where Lassie sat with an innocent look on her face, eyes shut with a bright smile on her face while she waved. “Hello... mmm, that tastes good,” she said with a lick of her chops.

Lassie... the only one who, by my knowledge, knew about Twilight and myself... and accepted it... accepted it a little too much. “Lassie... what are you doing?!” I gasped in absolute shock, my mother clinging to me, still in shock from the startle. Lassie shrugged.

“It smelled good,” she replied. My head dropped. “Besides, if I had've asked for a taste you two lovebirds would've probably stopped... and the show must go on!” she announced and I groaned, along with my mother.

“I thought you said you didn't like him,” Twilight interjected and Lassie just shrugged with a 'meh'.

“I don't. He's not really my style... but beggers can't be choosers. Last couple of ponies that caught me peeping threw stuff at me and called the pound...” she replied. “Now then, without further ado...” Lassie pawed at Twilight's nethers, making her gasp. “Don't feel like you should stop just cause I'm here,” she said, moving her paw that was slicked with my mother's juices to my cock and giving it a brief stroke.

“Gahhh... this... this is... so wrong,” I whispered as Lassie gently stroked my cock, lubricated in my mother's pussy juice and cum.

“Yeah but what are yah gonna do? Tattle on me?... oh that's right,” she announced, just before shoving my thick shaft into Twilight's cooch. We both let out a gasp and her inner walls clenched down around me in response.

“Mmm... have her turn around and ride you backwards,” Lassie suggested. At first we were both skeptical about having Lassie around, but in the end both came to the quick conclusion that she was a nympho and would watch us anyways.

Twilight turned around and began to bounce that wonderful plot of hers against my lap. I gave her rump a gentle swat, making her flanks jiggle just a little. She let out a squeak but the smack only made her move her hips more. My cock slid inside her velvety cunt with every motion and in minutes drove me to my limit. “Ahh... ohh... mom...” I gasped and Lassie let out a squeal.

“Oooh, the best part, cumshot!” I just rolled my eyes but Twilight seemed to be lost in yet another orgasm which was clenching against my cock. My hands tightened around her hips holding her tight as I continued to thrust my hips.

“Quick, use your fingers and play with her clitoris! It'll drive her nuts!” Lassie ordered. I was about to interject but Lassie instead did it for me. I would've tried to stop her, had her actions not caused Twilight's insides to tighten even more. My back arched, driving my hips deeper into my mother, the sudden jerk causing a tingly numbing sensation in my cock, the sign I was ready to blow.

I felt a hot gush of slimy fluids seep past the sides of my cock which was gripped tightly by Twilight's cunt. My mother screamed in absolute ecstasy as my mutt pawed her sensitive fun button.

I let out a few jerky thrusts but just before I could reach my mark Lassie stopped me. “Wait, woah, hold on!” She said, just as I felt my balls tighten up, my cock already swelling and ready to cum.

My dog pulled me half way out of my mother's alluring nethers just as my first blast of cum shot out. It felt a little strange, only being halfway inside of her while I came... or maybe it was strange because my dog was holding the exposed length of my cock, stroking it ever so gingerly. A second torrent left my rod, no doubt plastering her love hole white.

My last few spurts were less potent but left us both gassed. It didn't take much for my cock to slip out but unlike ever before, my cum suddenly poured out of her in globs, her cunt opened wide from my cock. Not gaping but still giving me an enticing view that nearly made me want to go for round two.

The two of us lay flopped back while Lassie giggled. “You two get so carried away you forget there's more than just the two of you living here,” she laughed. I really hoped this didn't become a regular thing...

Sometime later...

My mother giggled as I kissed her tenderly. “Okay enough. I have to catch the train. Celestia needs me to accompany her to Saddle Arabia,” she said before planting a firm, yet brief kiss on my lips. “Okay, I gotta go. Be good... Lassie, watch over him and make sure nothing bad happens,” she teased and I gave a pouty face.

“Heyyyy...” I pouted playfully. Lassie laughed and gave a salute.

“Aye-aye captain. She'll be exactly the same when you come back, promise,” she said, giving the Pinkie swear. Twilight laughed and gave a wave as she departed.

After just a minute she was gone, off to the train station to Canterlot where she'd later accompany Celestia to Saddle Arabia for... princess duties I guess. I shut the door behind me and fluffed my white V-neck which clung tight to my body.

I had my cargo pants which I hardly wore anymore. My holy necklace rested around my neck, my wedding ring on my finger and my Bond watch around my wrist... just casual attire I guess. “So what now?” Lassie asked and I just shrugged.

“Dunno... sit on the balcony in a lawn chair and drink some apple juice... maybe berry punch,” I replied and Lassie rose a brow.

“Really? No... adventure into Ghastly Gorge, epic shootout with Timberwolves, save Angel Bunny from a horrible fate, rescue the world from a crazy mare with powers over the environment, adventure to the unclimbable mountain peak... just... sit and drink juice?” she asked and I blinked. Come to think of it, I had become really laid back lately.

“Uhh... yeah...” I replied, a little unsure with my own words though she spoke my mind.

“You've changed. Twilight tells me lots about when you first got here. All: shoot first, ask questions NEVER! Blow away anything that threatens Equestria. Hard headed take no shit kinda guy... just drink juice?”

“And lay on a lawn chair,” I finished, going to the fridge and retrieving a pitcher of mixed fruit juice along with a glass. Lassie just sighed, grabbing a cup for herself and following me up to the balcony.

I set out a small table and flipped out the long lawn chair as Lassie flipped hers out. Pouring myself a drink, I let out a relaxed exhale. “Ah yes... this is the life...” I whispered and Lassie just stifled a laugh.

“Seriously? Twilight said you used to spend every single moment of your beginning life in Equestria bodybuilding and trying to find a way home and now... this?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“Rolling with the wind Lassie... gotta keep up with the times. It's pretty nice here... wayyyy better than back home,” I admitted openly, not feeling one sense of guilt about it. “Though I would like to have a slab of steak every now and then...” I thought to myself out loud and I heard Lassie lick her lips.

We sat for a little while, conversing about things that'd taste good. At first it was mostly meats; bacon, porkchop, ribs, steak, ham, turkey. But after a short time of meat product we moved on to other things. Sundaes, waffles with whip cream, milkshakes...

Not soon after Lassie sat up. “Actually... cum to think of it,” she giggled and moseyed back inside. I peeked back then shrugged as I leaned back into my seat. As I sat I let my eye flutter shut, just relaxing and basking in the warmth of Celestia's gift to the world.

A scream echoed in the sky but all I managed was a crack of my eye before a blur of grey slammed me right to the floor of the balcony. “Nughhh...” I groaned in discomfort. I felt the shivering of a pegasus that laid across my chest. I gave her fur a gentle pat and rub. “Afternoon... Derpy...” I grunted.

Her head perked up and she looked to me with an expression of distraut. “EVAN! I'm so sorry...” she looked to the sky and blinked with those cute crisscrossed eyes of hers. “I was flying along then 'WHOOSH!' The wind caught me and...” she trailed off and looked past me, towards the balcony door before squealing.

I heard Lassie's voice speak up. “Oh, hey Derpy,” Lassie greated. Derpy clapped her hooves erratically.

“Oooh, I love cream pies!” she chimed and I rose a brow, looking back to see that Lassie had two cream pies on a plate. Lassie stifled a laugh.

“Uhh... oh, is that so. Tell me, do you like eating them out?” she laughed, and Derpy nodded quickly.

“Mhmm, they're really good but they're kinda messy and it gets all over the place,” she replied and Lassie nearly burst into laughter, quickly setting the pies down on the table.

“Bwa-hahahahahaha... oh goddess, that's priceless,” she cackled. Both Derpy and I gave her a glance. “What?... oh goddess you two are so... you know, you guys should have a cream pie,” Lassie commented and I sighed.

“Uhh... I dunno. I just want some juice. Derpy can have mine,” I replied and Lassie smirked.

“You're gonna give her a cream pie?” she said, stifling a laugh. I nodded with a shrug as I stood up and stretched, but I felt a piece of wood from the busted lawn chair jabbed into my lower back.

“Yeah... sure I'll give her my cream pie,” I replied with a grunt, Lassie nearly tearing up with laughter.

“Oh... oh goddess, it's too much! You're... oh...” she trailed off with a look of horror that matched Derpy's as I pulled the small four inch long piece of wood out of my back. “Bleeding!” Lassie gasped but I just waved it off.

“Splinter, it's nothing,” I replied, the injury quickly sealing shut. Lassie was quicker to accept it but I gave Derpy an assuring nod and turned so she could see where the injury used to reside. “See? Nothing wrong,” I replied modestly.

Derpy smiled with a wipe of her brow before turning her attention to the cream pie. “Sure you don't want some? We can share,” she suggested but I just shook my head.

“Nah... but if you want I'll get you a chair,” I offered and she looked to me. “For... you know, if you wanna relax with us,” I offered and she nodded quickly. Lassie snickered to herself silently.

"Yeah... so he can give you a creampie..."

“I'd love to hang out with you two. If you don't mind,” she replied in her usual dopey voice. I nodded in reply and went back inside to retrieve two more chairs, a glass for Depry and my aviators.

I probably looked silly, sunglasses with an eye patch, but regardless. I made my way back up to the balcony and set the chairs out, the three of us quickly relaxing. “Ahhh... yep,” I said to myself.

Derpy let out a relaxed sigh. “Yep,” she added in.

Down in the street below, Big Mac must've been talking because I heard his trademark 'Eeyup'.

Lassie added in her relaxed sigh. “Mhmm.”

I gingerly sipped at my glass of juice, still cold from the ice cubes. Condensation resided on the sides of my glass, wetting the palms of my hand as I drank my beverage. Lassie and Derpy devoured their pies, making a mess on the balcony that I'd undoubtedly have to clean up later. We all sat for what must've been hours. I looked to my watch to see it was getting on in the day but by no counts late, only being four-thirty, though the watch displayed it as 1630.

Before I really realized, a western theme tune was playing. I looked over to see Lassie had retrieved that radio Spike had given me for Christmas and was playing one of my custom CDs. The tune was from the Dollar Trilogy, specifically the main theme from 'A fistful of dollars'.

Lassie hummed to the tune. “Sounds western... like something Applejack would listen too...” she commented. I chuckled.

“It was from a movie... it was a spaghetti western,” I informed her.

“Spaghetti?” Derpy and Lassie both asked.

“I don't understand why they called it that either... just the genre of movie... westerns were what made me want to buy a Winchester 30-30 levergun,” I mentioned but they both just blinked, having no idea what that was.

“A what?” Lassie asked, Derpy interested too in the topic, the theme still humming along.

“Mmm... an oldie but a goldie... they didn't serve much purpose in the modern world back home, what with the invention of more powerful and faster cycling rifles, but with famous actors doing movies with old leverguns and revolvers they sort of came back into popular culture... and I wanted one more than anything at one point,” I informed them.

Derpy spoke up. “So what is it?!” she asked, her curiosity for the matter nearly bursting. I had technically just told them, but I'd give them the benefit of the doubt since firearms weren't a thing in this world.

“Uhm... you know my... my guns, right?” I asked and they both nodded, having both seen what they were. “Well... the ones I'm talking about were like the big long ones, except they had this... this thing that you'd like...” I made the motion as though to action the lever, "And though would chamber a round into the gun..." I let out a sigh, knowing they'd have no idea what I was going on about. “Anyway, I got one,” I replied with a sigh of regret.

“Was it good?” Derpy asked, hearing the regret in my voice.

I turned to her. “Have you ever... wanted something so badly you can almost taste it... almost feel it?” I asked and she nodded. “Well... I was so hyped up to buy one... I think it would've been...” I trailed off and thought in my head. “SKS, Boito 590, SVT-40, Mosin, Eagle...

“Sixth gun... anyway, I had this wild hankering to have one. It was getting to me so bad I brainlessly went into the local gunshop without any thought whatsoever. They had a couple guns but they weren't the one I wanted. I wanted... it had to be what I imagined it. Anyway the gunshop owner knew me better than I knew myself and said he had just what I wanted and pulls out this box. Says the original owner bought it new in the box, never been fired and probably just sat in the closet. So I got the rifle and it came out to just short of $1100... which is ridiculously overpriced for a regular levergun,” I replied and Lassie rose a brow while Derpy spoke both their thoughts.

“So if it was overprice why'd you buy it?” she asked, curious as ever.

“Cause I wanted the gun that badly. It was called a Canadian Centennial... being from Canada I thought it was cool that there were maple leafs engraved in the side with Canadian Centennial written with gold colored lettering... figured maybe I'd use silicon paint and color the maple leafs red and the branches brown or something...” I informed them. Lassie was quick with her question.

“But?...” she asked, already partially knowing where this was going.

“But... well I got home and pitched the box into the burning barrel since that's what I do with all the boxes of new guns... then went to research the rifle a little to figure out how to clean it and lube it up properly before being shot for the first time... turns out the rifle was a commemorative gun and was worth more unfired and still in the box... which I had torched...” I replied and Derpy gasped.

“That's awful,” she whined while Lassie just cackled.

“That's priceless... just like the gun would've been!”

I just shrugged. “Well... yes and no. The value of those rifles is stated to be around $600 new in the box, but most shops sold them for upwards of $900 to $1200, sometimes more... they also came in a set of two and if you had the twin set still in the box they could easily fetch you around $2000... well, anyway, unfired the rifle was still worth a bit more than if I shot it...” I trailed off.

Derpy spoke up. “So what happened?” she asked, curious to the fate of my rifle.

“Well... I called her Daisy, left her in her original state and stored her away. Never shot... guess I was kinda scared to do it... I dunno... I bought another two shotguns then I was gonna go out and buy a regular Marlin levergun but I never got the chance. I ended up here...” I replied.

Lassie spoke up with a sense of wonder. “So... never shot her? Like... not even a little?” she asked and I shook my head.

“Nope... actually she's in the toolbox of my truck,” I stated and Lassie fell over with a gasp.

“UGH! GAH, why didn't you just show us?!” she asked, pointing out my stupidity. I rubbed my chin.

“Oh... oh yeah,” I commented as I rubbed my chin. “Yeah, why didn't I do that?” I asked nopony in particular. Lassie shot up.

“Well come on then Mr. Intelligent, show us the money... gun,” she ordered. I stood up, along with Derpy and we all proceeded outside. I opened the one toolbox where six cases lay present. Applebloom, No-Name, Trillium, Nightshade, Violet and Daisy.

“Well... you know, this toolbox could only fit six gun cases if I put them a certain way. When I bought Heather, my Norinco, I put her in the back window rack because... well, no room here,” I replied.

“Special treatment?” Lassie asked and I just shrugged with a shake of my head.

“No... just... whatever. Anyway,” I replied as I pulled out the case labeled 'Daisy'. Opening it up, we were beheld by the beauty of the rifle. Many people will comment that post 1964 Winchester rifles weren't as good as the pre-64... but that didn't stop this rifle from looking as elegant as ever.

The barrel was octagonal, at a length of twenty-six inches. The scrolling and engraved receiver looked awesome, one of the main reasons I purchased the rifle. The blueing was just as fine as the day it had been made. The trigger and hammer were blued like most of the rifle and the inscription along the side of the barrel read 'Canadian Centennial 1867-1967' in gold letters.

The stock was walnut if I wasn't mistaken, and had a glossy lamination that made the rifle feel smooth to the touch and look even more beautiful. The iron sights were a little strange, but really reinforced the idea that the gun was just meant to be on display rather than a shooter. Instead of buckhorn sights or leaf sights, or even a peephole sight, the front post was a blade type sight with a little metal ball at the top while the rear sight was like nothing I was used to or even seen before. It just looked like a U.

Lassie rose a brow. “Wow... that thing looks pretty sleek,” she mentioned. Derpy blinked curiously, not sure what to think. “Well come on then, let's shoot it!” Lassie commented and it felt like I had taken a hit to the gut.

“I... well... we shouldn't...” I stammered, choking on my words a bit.

“Oh come on, what's the big deal?!” Lassie asked. I didn't exactly have a good answer but Derpy interjected.

“Lassie, you shouldn't pressure friends into doing something they're not comfortable with. It's his... Daisy,” she said, looking down to the case and reading the name I gave her. My gut twisted as I swallowed hard.

“I guess... well... it's never gonna be worth anything in this world...” I stated and Lassie paw-pumped the air but again Derpy interjected.

“Don't feel like you have to Evan. It's entirely up to you what you do with your things,” she said. Wow... for a mare who didn't come off as super intelligent she spoke words of great wisdom.

I took a deep breath. “Nah... I think it's time... why buy a gun for so much and never use it at least once? What's the point in that? It'd be like making a super duper muffin and never eating it, just leaving it on display...”

I put Daisy back in her case for now and grabbed some ammunition from the second toolbox. “Just uhh... let me do something first,” I told them as I went back inside. Shedding most of my clothes I changed into a more... western look.

Those black trousers Derreck had spray painted, a nice white t-shirt covered by the vest Braeburn had given me which was then covered by my duster made by Rarity along with the spur boots. Slowly, and most gingerly, I reached for my cowboy hat and placed it atop my head before looking at myself in a mirror.

I looked kinda silly and ridiculous, especially with the eye patch. Walking back outside, I saw that Lassie had retrieved the radio and was playing more of my western music. As she saw me walking out she stifled a laugh. “Please tell me the movie actors that did westerns didn't look as corny as that,” she cackled and I frowned.

“Oh goddess... ohhh that's priceless!” she squealed. I sighed and retrieved the rifle from her case, putting the case in the toolbox. My heart started to thump. I couldn't believe I was doing this.

Grabbing a pair of earplugs for each of us, I held the rifle with one hand while stuffing the ammo into my coat with the other. Lassie spoke up. “Hey... wherever we're goin... can't we drive?” she asked.

I licked my lips. “Well...” I trailed off, closing my eyes and visioning it. The western tunes from the Dollar Trilogy played in the background while a small gust of wind blustered past my feet, nabbing at the flaps of my duster coat. I gripped on the rifle with both hands. “We could just walk... it's not far...” I replied. Lassie sighed as she followed along with the radio, Derpy close behind.

Derpy trotted up beside me. “Evan, are you really okay with this?” she asked and I sucked it down.

“It... well... I dunno. It's like... I don't know how to explain it. But it's time,” I informed her and she hovered up and rested a hoof on my shoulder.

“It's okay if you don't want to. Some things aren't meant to happen,” she said. I looked forwards and spotted a street sign in her path.

“Sign,” I stated bluntly, nodding my head towards the sign. She nodded.

“Yes, some things happen and it guides you-” she started but I cut her short.

“No, like, sign ahead,” I replied but she didn't quite get the blunt statement and continued on with her words of wisdom.

“Sometimes it's better to wait and think about it before acting-” I cut her off, grabbing her and gently redirecting her flight away from the sign. “Woah! I didn't even see that... thanks,” she thanked me and I gave her a tip of my hat.

“No... thank you Derpy. I know what you mean but it's been long enough. I should shoot it at least a few times,” I said to which Lassie spoke up.

“Me too! I get to try it, dibs seconds,” she reserved her place in shooting the rifle. I looked to Derpy.

“You wanna try too?” I asked and she twitched her lip.

“Well... uhm... I don't... never did the thing with the bang thingy,” she informed me, which I already knew. “What's it like?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Fulfilling... I don't know, it's kinda... fun I guess, depending on how you take it,” I replied. After another few minutes we reached the open pastures. I went over to an apple tree and plucked an apple, placing it on a stump nearby.

I don't know why but this was so... heart pumping. Like I was about to do something I wasn't readily prepared for. Maybe I wasn't. Walking back a few dozen yards, I handed out the earplugs to Lassie and Derpy, informing them of why they should put them in.

With a shallow breath, I reached into my coat pocket and fished out a single cartridge. On the rim of the cartridge read '30-30 WIN'. The bullet itself was a lead core that was jacketed with metal. Remington branded it as 'Core-Lokt' ammo but really it was just jacketed soft point.

Timidly holding the single brass cartridge, I thumbed the shell into the loading door on the side of the rifle. With a controlled deep breath I racked on the buttery smooth action of the rifle. With a round in the chamber, I butted up the stock to my shoulder and lined up my sights with the apple.

My heart was thumping, each beat like a gong in my ear. Sweat beaded down my face but that might be because it was hot out and I was wearing a duster coat. My finger rested feverishly on the trigger, Lassie leaning in close to me, watching with great interest.

Sweat dripped down onto my lips and just as I began to squeeze back on the trigger I sprung my finger out of the trigger guard, gasping as I pointed the rifle to the ground. “I can't! I can't...” I wheezed, Lassie's entire figure seeming to deflate as she sighed. Derpy trotted up to my side, removing her earplugs but giving me a warming smile as she rest a hoof on my side.

“It's okay. When you're ready, do it at your own pace,” she told me. I racked on the lever and caught the live casing mid-flight, putting it back into my pocket. Lassie sighed but then spoke up.

“Can we at least paint it like you wanted? I think there's some of the silicon paint back home,” Lassie asked. I thought about it for a moment before nodding.

“Yeah... sure. That'd be pretty cool,” I said and we all made our way back to the library. I wasn't sure why I was okay with painting the rifle but not shooting it... quirks I guess. As we entered the library Derpy and I proceeded downstairs while Lassie went to retrieve the paint. Soon accompanying us, she carried down some dark red paint and some wood brown paint.

Setting Daisy down on the bench, Lassie pulled out a fine tipped paintbrush. “You're rifle. You should be the first,” she commented. I took a tiny dab of red paint and started with one of the leaves. I leaned back and looked at it. It wasn't quite what I was expecting but we weren't done either. Lassie started on another leaf while Derpy looked to me.

“Are you okay with this?” she asked and I nodded.

“Oh yeah, knock yourself out... just uhh, try to stay inside the lines, you know?” I replied, offering her a brush. With an unsure nod she started painting one of the branches wood brown. Lassie spoke up, still painting away.

“This is cool, all of us doing something together,” my canine companion mentioned. We all nodded and within a few minutes were done that side. “I'll get a stand,” Lassie said, zooming off and quickly returning with a small bench rest for the rifle so we could paint the other side whilst the first side dried.

There wasn't much room so Lassie and Derpy did most of the painting. After all was said and done the three of us stepped back to admire the rifle. She was quite pretty. Lassie leaned over to me. “Won't shoot it but painting it up is fine, huh?” she teased but I didn't answer.

While the rifle dried the three of us went back up to the balcony and I began to relax again. “Yep,” Derpy whispered.

“Yup,” I added in.

“Mhmm,” Lassie finished. After a while longer I heard Derpy shuffling some things around on the table, setting out a chess board.

“Wanna play?” she asked hopefully and I nodded with a smile.

“One condition,” I replied and she rose a brow, a look of mild shock on her face.

“Go easy on me.” Lassie chuckled before sitting up.

“Well... while you two dingalings play chess, I'm gonna go for a drive,” she told me. She walked back inside then out the ground floor entrance and I watched her hop into Juggernaut and drive off.

I looked back to Derpy whom was playing as white again. I looked to my black pieces, namely to my king piece. I wasn't sure what possessed me to do so but I picked it up and gave the chess piece a kiss to the snout before setting it back down.

Derpy made first move and my stomach sank. I knew, just gut feeling, she was gonna mop the floor with me...

* * *

Third person...

Lassie bombed along towards the loading yard and looked down the the CB radio that resided just beneath the air conditioning controls. Grabbing it she began fooling around with the device.

“Uhh, breaker one-niner this is eagle six do you read? I'm Oscar Mike, ETA five minutes,” she giggled playfully but to her surprise the radio chirped back.

“What? Evan's dog, is that you?” Chirped Flam's voice.

“Woah! It's the clown brothers,” Lassie taunted back.

“CLOWNS?! We're not clowns!” Flim burst over the radio to which Lassie squeaked with joy.

“Yeah, well I'm not Evan's dog, I'm Lassie,” she shot back. There was a moment of silence before Flam spoke.

“Yes indeed, well... Lassie, what was it you were talking about?” he asked.

“Oh nothing, I was just fooling around, you know?” she chuckled, to which Flam scoffed.

“Well, please refrain from doing so. The radio should only be used for emergencies.” Lassie began to mock his words, mouthing his exact sentence word for word in a foalish manner.

“Yup, kay, I'm just gonna fill up, over and out,” she replied before hanging up. “Goofy clown striped brothers,” she laughed to herself. Pulling up to the fuel pumps in the loading yard. She shut Juggernaut down before giving the steering wheel a pat. “Sorry honey, I ain't gonna fondle you like Evan does Cadance,” she said, hopping out, lazily leaving the driver door open while opening up the fuel door and cap.

Grabbing the diesel nozzle, she flicked on the pump, but no sooner had she turned around the pump was turned off. Spinning around, she was greeted to the sight of three large rats.

“Hello again... Canidae oh-six-seven,” said the first rat.

“We've been waiting for you,” said the second just as two more rats came out on the flanks of the first three.

“You!” Lassie snarled, remembering her first encounter with these rodents. Knowing where this was undoubtedly going to lead to, she decided to make the first move and charged. In a flash the first rat drew a small paw held crossbow and fired a tranquilizer dart into Lassie stomach.

With a gasp, the dog staggered back, looking to the dart which was leaking it's potency into her body. Yanking it out and tossing it away, she knew for certain she only had a short amount of time before she collapsed.

Rushing back to the truck, she hopped in and grabbed the radio. “FLIM, FAM-” Her words were already beginning to distort. “Port! Ratssf, HURRRYYYYY!” She screamed just as the rats grabbed her hindlegs and yanked her back out.

The radio dangled about freely on the cord as Flim and Flam answered back. “What? Lassie? Lassie, talk to us! LASSIE!” Flam's voice screamed...

Author's Note

So I actually do have a Winchester Canadian Centennial, but I never got the box with it, the gunshop owner said the box was pretty toast when they got it, but the rifle is unfired. You can tell because there's no primer marks on the head of the firing block. I just figured to add that bit in to play true to the character's stupidity. Anywho, sorry bout the wait again, I was up north (Higher up north since I'm already in Canada) doing some contracting work for the last two weeks. I'm gonna try to have the next chapter out this weekend, or at least the Monday after. If not, than shame on me.
Cheers everyone:raritywink:

Chapter 54

'Canidae oh-six-seven...'

Burdy's perspective...

I groaned, dipping my face into both palms as Derpy clapped her hooves excitedly. I smile came across my face, a warmth inside of me. As bad as it felt losing this horribly, the warm feeling of hearing her joyful squeals every time she absolutely wrecked me was more than worth it... I just wish she'd let me take at least one piece of her roster. I hadn't even taken one of her pawns...

I leaned back, taking a sip of juice from my glass as Derpy knocked over my queen piece with a rook. “Wanna play again?” she asked playfully. I swear she was a joyful as Pinkie, yet as competitive as Dash at board games.

“Okay Derpy. We'll play again... but how bout checkers this time?” I asked, hoping that my chances at checkers wouldn't be as disastrous as my obvious chances with chess. I couldn't really ask her to let me win, that'd take the sport and joy out of it... but it would be nice if I could at least get a chance.

Just as she flipped the board over to start setting out the checker pieces, something caught my attention. I wasn't sure what it was but my senses picked up. My perception became acute. I noticed Derpy's lips were slightly dry from slight lack of proper hydration. Her fur was soft and silky looking, reflecting the sun.

The sweat that dripped down onto my lip was bitterly salty. Derpy smelled like a fresh batch of muffins... blueberry muffins.

Then it hit me. My ear twitched just ever so slightly as I picked up a distressed voice that was slightly muffled coming from the street below. Derpy looked to me and spoke. “Is something-” I cut her off, waving for her to hush up for just a moment.

“You hear that?” I asked, her ears perking up. I held my finger up, determining the direction of the voice, and quickly came to the realization it was coming from just down below, directly in front of the library.

I stood up and looked over the edge of the balcony. I heard the muffled voices of... somepony, coming from below us, near Cadance. I wasn't sure what possessed me to do so, but I simply leapt off the balcony, dropping like a stone due to some apart weight increase yet landing gracefully in a crouched position.

I winced at first, figuring the fall to hurt a lot more than what it actually did. Looking back up, I noticed the drop was quite considerable and probably should've at least left a lingering pain.

Derpy fluttered down next to me. I looked around and found the voices were actually coming from Cadance. “Ca... Cadance?” I asked, baffled by my discovery. I rushed up and took a closer look, quickly realizing the voices were coming from inside of her.

I opened the driver side door, the voices coming from that CB radio Flim and Flam put in. “Oh yeah... that thing-” I was cut off by their frantic shouts.

“Evan! EVAN PICK UP! PICK UP! It's an emergency!” they shouted. I picked up the CB radio and called back to them.

“Uh... hey guys, how was Mareami?” I asked, remembering that they had gone their with Sapphire Shores.

There was a short pause. “Splendidly, thank you for asking... but this is serious. Get down to the loading yard right away!” they shouted at me, not saying a syllable more. I blinked unsurely before looking to Derpy who stood beside me.

“Can you uhh... get my rifle from up on the balcony?” I asked. She gracefully flew up, retrieved the rifle and hovered back down. Taking the rifle, I nodded to her. “Uhm... I guess our game of checkers will have to wait.” I thought to myself. 'What kind of emergency could possibly arise?'

Looking to Derpy, I figured there was no harm in her coming. “Wanna come with me for a ride?” I asked, offering her the passenger seat. She smiled brightly and hopped up into the offered seat. I took the driver side and pulled down the visor.

The keys fell and I snatched them mid-flight. I gave the steering wheel a gentle kiss. “Hey honey, how are you?” I asked, rubbing my hand down the column. “Mhmm? You don't say,” I replied as I swiped the naughty key, getting a positive 'beep-beep' from the vehicle. “Oooh, that's my girl,” I said, keying the ignition.

The truck rumbled to life, the iconic chug of the 7.3L turbo filled my ears as I put her into drive and rolled out. As we quickly left Ponyville and picked up speed towards the loading yard, or whatever it used to be, Derpy spoke up.

“What do you think went wrong?” She asked and I shrugged.

“Knowing them... probably nothing serious,” I replied reassuringly. I truly didn't know what could possibly have them in a panic. As I neared the yard, I spotted their train contraption but also something that made my heart sink a little.

'Something serious,' my conscious spoke up. I gulped as I looked at Juggernaut sitting idly, the driver side door open. I pulled up, leaving Cadance running as I stepped out, Derpy hopping out of the driver side as well rather than fidget with the door lever on the passenger side.

Flim and Flam rushed out, both sputtering frantically. “LASSIECALLEDUS!SOMETHINGABOUTRAFTSANDTHEYARD!” They both yelled out in panic.

Before I could speak, my words got choked up and another voice spoke. “Shut up... sit down... relax,” Derreck said, stepping up beside me.

“Woah... where'd you come from?” I asked and he just shrugged, pointing off into the distance. I rolled my eye. Of course he'd answer like that.

“From over there,” he answered literally. I just sighed and looked back to the brothers. “What happened?” Derreck asked. Both brothers took a deep inhale, as though to hyperventilate. “Relax... just... one of you recap everything that happened.”

Flim spoke first. “Well... first she was toying around with the radio and said she was going to fill up the truck here...” he trailed off and Flam finished.

“Then she called back about rafts, and the loading yard. Then it just... she stopped talking,” Flam finished. Derreck took a deep breath, looking to Derpy.

“Hey... uhh... can you just...” he trailed off, waving his hand for her to move aside. Derpy just blinked and stepped aside, Derreck looking at the opened door of Juggernaut with a tilted gaze. Several visions flashed through my mind but I couldn't depict what they were.

He walked over and inspected Juggernaut, quickly pointing to the driver seat which had cuts in it. “Claw marks... she was pulled out of the vehicle while making that call... rafts?” he asked himself before looking to the ground. More visions flashed in my head, that of Lassie being dragged out of the driver seat. “No blood... so it didn't escalate violently... but there was a fight,” he said, picking up a few strands of hair that I wasn't quite sure how he spotted. I saw Lassie, slashing wildly with her paws at dark figures.

He took a sniff. “Rats... not rafts,” he replied, taking another sniff just to be sure. A shiver went down my back.

“Rats?” Flim asked.

“What do rats have to do with this?” Flam interjected. Another shiver went down my back as I remembered the time I had been kidnapped here by a pack of abnormally sized rodents. Quickly racing to Cadance, I grabbed Daisy, as she was the most easily accessible firearm at the time.

“In there!” I gasped, the rifle pointed towards the loading yard building. I quickly grabbed a few stray shells from my duster coat pocket and thumbed them into the rifle. I didn't really want to shoot this rifle for whatever reason, but I didn't really have time to grab another rifle from its case, then retrieve the ammo as well. I had no idea what they could be doing to Lassie and I didn't have time to waste.

With a swift motion, I actioned the lever on the gun and rushed blindly into the old building. Dashing through the front doors, I yelled out. “LASSIE! LASSIE WHERE ARE YOU?!” I cried out, my voice echoing slightly but found myself answered by silence and nothingness. The place was empty for the most part.

My heart was pounding as I remembered the horrid experience I had with the rats. If they were doing that to my dog... my grip on Daisy intensified but Derreck rested a soothing hand on my shoulder.

“There's something else you should see,” he told me. I turned to see that Derpy and the F brothers had followed me.

“They... I was...” I stammered on my breath. Finally posturing myself I spoke as best I could, still stammering slightly. “I was filling up here once and they... they uhm... they kidnapped me. I uhh... well I broke out,” I said, tears coming to my eyes. 'Fuck! How could this happen?!' my thoughts began to run amuck with everything.

Derreck led us back outside and near the pumps where he knelt down and picked up a small cylindrical dart. “Tranquilizer... I think,” he replied as he rolled the dart around in his palm. He looked at the side of the cylinder and read the inscription. “M&M...” he muttered but Flam grumbled angrily.

“Milf and Malf!” he spat with a sour tone. I rose a brow as did Derreck whom chuckled slightly.

“Milf?” he asked and Flam spoke.

“And his brother Malf... they're our cousins...” he growled, though neither of them were overly terrifying in this angered state of theirs.

“Yeah but... Milf?” he asked and I sighed, coming to realize what it was.

“Oh... I get it... like Flim and Flam but backwards... yeah okay...” I muttered in a bemused tone. “So what's the deal?” I asked and Flim scowled.

“They're scum! They're inventors like us but much, much, MUCH, worse!” he stated and Derreck rose a brow.

“How so?” he asked.

“They completely disregard the safety of others with their inventions and only care about their own profits!” they both replied, to which Derreck chuckled.

“Coming from you two, that's kinda funny,” he replied and Flim gasped, holding his hoof to his chest innocently.

“What?! To even imply we don't care about the safety of others-” Derreck cut him short.

“No, not that, the other part... never mind. Okay... so where are these goons?” he asked but the brothers just shrugged. “What do you mean you don't know? Aren't they your cousins?” he asked and they nodded, Flim speaking.

“Well of course they are. Our family is the most talented bloodline when it comes to inventions. If it's advanced and ahead of its time, you can guarantee the founder is in someway related to us...” he trailed off as he realized he was getting off topic. Flam picked up and got the topic back on track.

“Yes, well, what my brother is getting at is... well, although their inventions were... advanced... and quite remarkable... they were usually pretty dark and sinister. They were actually the ones that invented the automatic crossbows, and some of the first fossil fuel driven automobiles. Of course, the automatic bows were quickly outlawed for obvious reasons. Soon after, the effects natural gasses had on the environment were made clear and though they weren't made illegal... most ponies who could afford one switched to the more nature friendly magically driven carriages. That didn't however, stop them from making money with their inventions. They quickly found buyers in the... underground market. They began selling to mobsters and gangsters alike in Manehatten, and with the continued production of their illegal weaponry, were quickly labeled as outlaws... however, they just sort of... disappeared after that. Nopony really knows where they went... or if they're even still alive,” he informed my big friend.

Derreck tossed the tranquilizer dart away and rubbed his chin. “So these guys get around huh?” he replied and I remembered the time I was in Manehatten. The auto-bow I had used was quite fantastic and made me wonder if it was an M&M product.

Standing up, Derreck walked to the edge of the loading yard where the concrete ended and the dirt and grass began. Walking along the edge of the concrete, he stopped again, the entire group following him.

“Look here,” he said, pointing to some paw prints still fresh in the ground. “This guy here, was heavier than the others,” he said, making note of how the one set of paw prints sank deeper into the dirt than the others. “That means they must've tranqed Lassie... she passed out and they carried her from the truck over here...” he trailed off and looked to where the paw prints stopped. My vision flashed with the sight of a rat carrying Lassie over his shoulder.

“And they got into a carriage...” he said, pointing to the wheel tracks that led away. “It wasn't one that needed to be pulled either. Look, there's no prints to show that somepony... something, was pulling it along... and I'm willing to bet it was another Milf and Malf product...” he muttered before standing up. I watched the vision play out as Lassie was tossed into the back of a motorized carriage and the rats all climbed in, quickly puttering away.

I spoke up in wonder. “So... so where does that leave us?” I asked as he rose to his full height.

“It leads us right to them,” he replied and our entire group spoke up at the same time.

“It does?” we all asked in shock, even Derpy whom had been silent the entire time. We were baffled he had somehow already figured out the mystery of where they were.

“Well... almost. Evan, where's the only place we've encountered motorized carriages?” he asked.

“Well... Filthy Rich has a magically-” he cut me short.

“The fossil fuel kind,” he stated bluntly.

“Uhhh...” I thought back on it. I had been to a few places, even Canterlot. But in all those places I had only ever seen them in... “Manehatten?” I asked and he nodded.

“If I were a bettin' man... that's where I'd go,” he told us. My heart sank. Manehatten wasn't exactly a good place. Goddess only knows why they'd bring Lassie there. What the hell'd they even want with her anyway?

Derreck whistled. “Juggernaut, to me,” he called out. The truck rumbled to life and puttered over. I rose a brow and he just shrugged. “Voice activated. I found that trick out a while ago.” He looked to the group. “Flim, Flam. We gotta go to your garage and get some things.” he told them before patting Juggernaut's hood. “To the garage girl,” he told the truck. It throttled up before leaving. I looked to the two brothers.

“It has voice activation and... an auto-pilot?” I asked and they smiled with a nod.

“Like we said. Ages before its time. We'll meet you at the garage,” they said before mounting up to their train thing and departing. I felt a hoof rest on my shoulder and I turned to see Derpy looking to me with heartfelt eyes.

“I'm here for you, okay,” she assured me, trying to offer some peace of mind. I nodded. Derreck, Derpy and I hopped into Cadance. I decocked the hammer on Daisy before setting her in the back seat and heading off. My thoughts kept racing, mostly coming to the worst possible outcome.

“What if we can't find her?” I asked, mostly to myself in a form of panic.

Derpy rest an assuring hoof on my shoulder. “We will. Lassie's a good dog. Nothing bad's gonna happen to her,” she tried to assure me but it wasn't really helping.

“But what if something does?” I asked back but this time Derreck answered.

“Those rats won't do anything bad... if they know what's good for them. We're still on good terms with the Liotta family... well, Leone likes us anyway, and that's all that matters. We should stop in and say hi,” Derreck suggested and I remembered the events of the last time we had been in Manehatten. Everything from killing that thug that held Derpy hostage to the absolute slaughter of the Gravelli family.

I started thinking about Derpy, and her place in all this. She didn't need to see any of this again. Maybe she should just stay-

“There they are,” Derreck said, pointing to Flim and Flam whom were just pulling up alongside their garage. Juggernaut was already parked and waiting. I pulled up alongside Juggernaut and shut Cadance down, the three of us hopping out.

Derreck spoke out to Flim and Flam. “I'm gonna need Juggernaut and the Eagle Eye,” he stated. As my heart finally started to simmer down, I took notice it was getting late in the day. Spike would be home soon. I'd need to do something about that too.

Just before I could think of much else, I heard something cocking behind my head, along with a gasp from Derpy. “Don't make any sudden movements, or I'll kill you for sure this time,” spoke a voice I had trouble pinning. I... couldn't recall where that voice was from. It was feminine but that's all I knew.

“Iniside, both of you,” she said. I looked to Derreck and Derpy. Who was she missing? The three of us slowly walked towards the door, where Flim and Flam were just walking out. The two brothers gasped. “Drop it!” the voice behind me ordered and Flam dropped the Eagle Eye.

“Inside, NOW!” the voice ordered sternly. Our group walked inside and stopped in the middle of the room. “Okay stop! Just... just... crap, what am I gonna do?!” the voice scowled. I slowly turned around, finally getting a glimpse of our aggressor. It was a cat... sort of. It was anthromorphic, standing on it's hind legs like a human, holding a hoof-held crossbow...

“You're that... that bandit!” I gasped, remembering all those months back when Flim, Flam, Derpy and I had our first confrontation with her. That was ages ago.

“Shut up!” she growled, her growl sounding just like an angered cat's. She bit her lip, pondering her every thought about whatever it was she was thinking about. I thought up a plan, as old and risky as it was, it was the only thing I could think off. Looking distinctly past her and making it obvious I was looking outside, I yelled out. “Suntrap, now!” I yelled.

Felix, the bandit, swung around, thinking somepony was actually there. I charged forwards in an instant, tackling her to the ground before she could even flinch. Tossing away her bow thing I turned to Flim. “Get me some zip ties or something.”

Flim rushed off and quickly returned, Felix growling and hissing like a primal animal as she tried to thrash out of my hold. I quickly zip tied her wrists behind her back but still held her to the ground as I sat on her.

I let out a sigh as most of us relaxed. I was glad no blood had been shed, for Derpy's sake. “LET ME GO! THEY'RE GONNA FIND ME! AND WHEN THEY DO-” Derreck quieted the talking cat by stuffing a dirty rag in her mouth.

Flam picked up the Eagle Eye and tossed it to Derreck whom promptly fitted it to his head. “Okay... so... where were we?” he asked. I sighed as a million thoughts started racing through my head.

Most of them being of Lassie and all the times we had together. I remembered the first time she talked, how weird it was to hear a dog talk. Now here I was sitting on a cat...

My thoughts stopped. This cat... thing, could talk to. It was a long shot but...

I took the rag out of Felix's mouth and she promptly tried to bite me. “HEY! KNOCK IT OFF OR I'LL BREAK YOUR JAW!” I boomed, startling the F brothers and Derpy. Felix's ears flopped back in fear from my raging outburst.

As I composed myself I asked her what was on my mind. “These... the ones who are after you... who are they?” I asked. She took a moment to answer.

“I don't know... my... my creators.” She sounded... distraught to say that.

“What... like your parents?” I asked but she shook her head as best she could.

“I didn't have parents-” she began but Flim cut in.

“You're... you're one of... those,” Flim said, putting emphasis on the last part like it was some kinda great disgrace.

Felix tried to spit at him but her glob of saliva fell short. I spoke up. “What do you mean?” I asked and Flam spoke.

“Our cousins... before they were branded outlaws, were splicing genetics to try and create a super army. An army they could sell to the highest bidder... or bidders, if they could build enough of them. They were called NYMPHO. It's supposed to stand for something but we're not sure what-” he was cut off by Felix who spat at him.

“We didn't ask to be made!” She scowled but Flam continued anyway.

“They were trying to create things that were tactically advantageous over regular armies. Of course it was quickly shut down by Celestia and the royal guard... I suppose the idea of private armies weren't all that appealing... Kind of strange in hindsight. Our cousins' creation coming and robbing us-” Felix cut in, screaming at him.

“SHUT UP! I only robbed you because you took my family's land! I wasn't even a creation, I was born!” she yelled and we all sat quiet as she spoke. “My family... my mother and father, we part of their army they were building but... well, once they had me they began thinking... they didn't want to live that life. There's severe consequences for trying to escape... I guess whoever created us didn't want to be found. My father died getting us out. My mother, my younger brother and myself, along with a few others escaped... of course these two idiots stole our land from us and my mother perished without the dairy milk from our farm and my brother was killed by bandits... I had nothing and I was on the run. So I took from those who took from me,” she said.

Derreck sat on her too and she gasped for air. “Heyyahhhh!” she wheezed breathlessly.

Turning to me, my big friend spoke. “I bet if we ask nicely, she'll lead us right to them,” he said, Felix still wheezing. We both sat up. “Oky doky kitty catty... where's this... factory or whatever?” he asked.

“I don't know, I was too young-” she was cut off by her own squeal of pain as Derreck put a foot on a pressure point and began resting weight on it.

“Oh come on... you just said your dad died helping you all escape. Plus you had a younger brother. Don't tell me you were too young to remember all that,” he quipped, easing the pressure off her body.

“Okay, OKAY! It's in Manehatten...” she whimpered. “On the outskirts... an old factory. Everypony just thinks it's abandoned but... anypony that goes in, doesn't come out,” she whispered fearfully.

“And you're positive?” he asked, Felix nodded. “Then I guess you won't mind showing us where this factory is,” he said and she gasped but before she could speak he stuffed her mouth with the rag again, heaving her body up over his shoulder.

Looking to me he nodded. “We'll need some supplies. We'll take Juggernaut. Flim, Flam, we'll need some fuel canisters for the trip,” he ordered. Walking back out, he opened the back hatch door on Juggernaut and simply tossed Felix in the back with a THUD.

Flim and Flam went to work on getting some fuel canisters while Derreck and I went to the back of Cadance. Derreck pulled out Trillium, newly refurbished with a glistening black stock. Derreck took a quick peak of the scope before putting her back in the case.

I looked at the selection. I should technically grab a rifle or shotgun that gives me an advantage. Maybe my Boito for the shear magazine capacity and devastation of a shotgun. We were going to a factory so it would be close quarters... I hoped.

Before I made the decision I thought back to a less... combat effective weapon. The last time I had used her she failed me... or well, the shot shell failed me. I retrieved Heather, my old Norinco 870 clone.

Finally coming to my senses, I realized Derpy was still with us. Slinging the shotgun around my back, I stopped in front of her. “Derpy... I want you to stay here,” I said and her mouth dropped as a sad expression came across her face.

“But I want to-” I cut her short.

“I know we're friends, and friends look out for each other, and Lassie was kidnapped and she's your friend... but I don't want you getting tangled into something like the last time we were in Manehatten.” I told her my exact thoughts and I could tell she wasn't happy about it. “I'm sorry Derpy. This is just something I don't want you experiencing,” I said solemnly.

She was taken away by my words but just nodded reluctantly, obviously wanting to help her friend regardless of the cost... I respected her for that, but this wasn't her fight. “Thank you Derpy,” I said before giving her a brief hug.

I turned to Flim and Flam whom had loaded some extra fuel into the back of Juggernaut. “You guys take care of her, okay... if we mess this up...” I bit my lip and hopped into the passenger seat, Derreck in the driver side.

“She not coming?” Derreck asked and I shook my head. “Why not?” he asked and I gave him a blunt 'You know why' look.

“She's too innocent... I don't want her going through that again.” I looked into the back where Felix lay struggling, gagged and tied. “Think she'll really show us where this place is?” I asked and Derreck shrugged as we pulled away in a hurry.

“Should. I don't see why she wouldn't. It's her only way out of this,” he replied. In just mere minutes were were bombing towards Ponyville at nearly 100mph. The suspension in this vehicle was a lot smoother and gave a more accommodating ride when off road compared to Cadance whom felt more like a horse drawn carriage in comparison.

“We gotta leave a note for Spike,” I informed Derreck whom just nodded. Pulling up with haste to the front of the library, I rushed inside, only to find it still vacant. “Spike must still be out...” I muttered before looking to my watch, only then to realize it was nearly seven-thirty. “Or sleeping over somewhere...”

“I'm gonna get some clothes and food. You leave the note,” Derreck said. I nodded whilst quickly scribbling down a note for Spike. It just told him I was going to be away but if I didn't come back soon, tell Luna or somepony important that something very bad has happened and to have them go talk with Flim and Flam about it.

Setting it down I realized he might need some money while I was gone. I quickly went and retrieved my wallet, leaving him a few Celestia bits. If he ran out of money by that time he should get the hint that something bad was amiss and call for help.

Derreck returned up the stairs dressed in a black trench coat, black trousers and a black shirt with a white skull on it. I blinked. “What happened to the Christian Cross?” I asked, remembering that before it used to have a cross, opposed to a skull.

His eye squinted as his scarred face wrinkled slightly. “God's gonna sit this one out.”

* * *

Third person...

Lassie came to her senses, albeit groggily, and licked her dry lips. “Uhh... this must be what a hangover feels like...” she groaned. Going to get up, she nearly flopped. Her legs were all tied together in rope.

“Hey?! What gives?!” she yelled then scrunched her nose as she realized there was a most foul odor amiss. Wherever, whatever she was in, jolted as it hit a bump, her body bouncing slightly in the back. “Ouch! HEY! LET ME GO!” Lassie shouted. She tried to look around but it was dark.

In moments however she realized that there was a bag over her head along with a lack of fresh oxygen. “HEY! GET THIS THING OFF MY HEAD!” Lassie screamed. The thing she was riding in came to a stop, her body skidding forwards.

“Goddess, shut her up,” said a voice. The bag came off her head and Lassie's eyes didn't take long to focus as it was already dark out, still nighttime. A rat stood above her on the small flat bed of the motorized carriage.

“Sush you, or else!” the rat snapped but Lassie bit back in response. With an angered grunt he jabbed her in the gut with three tranquilizer darts.

“Hey! Careful! They want her alive!” one of the rats shouted but the one above her just shrugged. Lassie quickly felt the world around her start to spin, as if motion sickness was setting in. As her world began to fade, she heard their voices speak.

“By the time she wakes up from that dose we'll be there...”

* * *

Evan's perspective...

Heather lay across my lap, my fingers gently tapping along the stock. When I found the bastards that did this...

“Mmmphmmmphm!” Came the muffled shouts of Felix. She hadn't shut up since we left Ponyville and that was ages ago.

She only quieted down for a few hours when she passed out, probably due to all her yelling with her mouth gagged. It had been nearly twelve hours. I wasn't sure how he did it but Derreck stayed awake, driving, the entire time. His drive, his anger over this, was greater than mine in a way.

I thought I would've been the most enraged over this, but there he was, his anger habored and growing by the minute. I could almost feel it. Like a tension in the air. His face was wrinkled from his constant angered squinting.

I will admit, his suit was pretty badass. I had no idea where he got an all black trench coat, but the skull was a cool addition over the holy cross. It gave him a... Punisher, kind of vibe.

“Mphmoophm,” came Felix's muffled yells once again.

Derreck spoke up for the first time since we left. “She probably needs water. It has been quite a while,” he commented. I nodded and groggily made my way into the back. I myself hadn't slept at all but unlike Derreck, I wasn't fit to do much.

I grabbed a nearby water canteen and took the gag out of her mouth. “LET ME GO!” Felix yelled, hissing like a cat.

I rubbed my eyes drearily before speaking in a monotone voice. “Listen... I'm gonna get my dog back. And you're gonna show us where she is... here, want some water?” I asked. I unscrewed the cap and offered to help her drink it.

She was reluctant and first but quickly began slurping back the water, chugging it even. Wow, she must've been parched. Emptying the canteen, I gently withdrew it from her mouth. “You know... I had you all wrong. I figured if you were just a goon for those stallions than you mustn't be any better than them... unless you're just keeping me alive to find your dog.”

I shook my head. “Nah. We're really nice guys. I know Derreck might come off a hardass but he means well,” I said and she rose a brow, going to ask a question before Derreck cut in.

“Don't ask. It'll only confuse you,” he said. She seemed awfully confused at first but seemed to settle herself.

“By the way... you've got a stowaway,” she mentioned. I cocked a brow before turning back to look to Derreck. In an instant I spotted whom she meant. Derpy sat peacefully napping behind Derreck's seat.

“Nggh! Derpy!” I gasped. Derreck kept driving but leaned around the seat so he could get a look.

“Oh, cool. Look, she did come along,” Derreck mused.

“UGH! STOP THE TRUCK!” I gasped, the vehicle immediately coming to a stop. Derpy awoke with a jolt from the abrupt halt. Immediately spotting me she gave a gingerly wave, along with a yawn.

“Morning,” she replied and my mouth went slack.

“Der... Derpy what are you... I told you not to come with us!” I gasped, shaking my head.

“Yeah but... well... you left this out of her case,” she said, displaying Daisy. I wanted to just collapse from her statement.

“I... you... Derpy you can't come with us...” I stated and she blinked.

“Why not?” she asked.

“Because.”

“Aren't we friends?” she asked and I nodded. “Isn't Lassie my friend?” I nodded again, trying to get a word out but she wouldn't allow me even a single syllable. “Wasn't Lassie kidnapped?” she asked but I didn't even have time. “Don't friends help other friends no matter what?” she asked.

I sighed. In theory she was right. But this wasn't theory, this was reality. I couldn't let the innocent pegasi take part in what we were about to do. Derreck however, spoke up. “Alright, it's settled then. She comes with. Evan, I don't care what you say, my vote trumps yours.” My jaw hung slack but Derpy spoke up.

“Did you really not want me to come with you to save Lassie?” she asked, almost hurt.

“It's not that I didn't want you to come with us just because I didn't want you to. I didn't want you to see what we're going to do,” I replied, dipping my head into my hands. She pulled me into a hug.

“You're going to do the same thing you did when those bad stallion kidnapped me. I know what you're going to do isn't very nice...” she trailed off and put a hoof to my chin, rising it so we were looking eye to eye, even if one of my eyes were covered with an eye patch. “I know you don't want me to see it, but when a friend truly needs your help, you'll do anything for them. That's what friends are for. I know you were just trying protect me, but know that I'm here to protect you,” she told me and we embraced into a hug.

Felix spoke up. “Dawww... ain't that cute,” she remarked sarcastically. While still hugging Derpy, I gave Felix the finger, whether or not she knew what it meant...

* * *

Third person...

Lassie awoke, groggily like before but this time with added nausea that made her puke up what little contents were in her stomach. “Uhh...” Lassie groaned as her head thumped. She tried to move but found herself bound to a chair, her front paws tied behind her, each hindleg tied to a leg of the chair.

“Good morning sweetheart,” spoke a loving voice from withing the darkness. Lassie quickly realized there was no bag on her head but rather she was somewhere completely dark. Lassie didn't answer, still feeling nauseous. “How do you feel?” the feminine voice asked.

“Like I was hit by a friggin' freight train... ooohhhugh... I think I'm gonna puke again,” Lassie moaned weakly. A gut wrenching fear struck her as she felt her body start to tighten, the feeling of her stomach twisting and getting ready to chuck up whatever might still be left in her stomach.

“Honey, you may want to shut your eyes, this is going to be bright,” the voice said. Lassie didn't have much time to react as bright ceiling lights flickered on, nearly blinding her. Her eyes came into focus and she saw two dogs standing before her on their hindlegs.

One had more feminine features, namely a more slender build, whilst the other was a heavier, huskier looking male. Both were English Rough Collies. The female held out a glass of water and two pills. “Here honey, their pain relievers, for the headache.”

Lassie's head instinctively swung away but she immediately regretted that motion as it nearly made her puke again, her head spinning with disorientation. Her head dropped down in front of her as she groaned.

The male dog just grunted. “Just shove them down her throat if you have to,” he grumbled, the female immediately lashing back.

“Sush!” she snapped, almost a bark. Her paw moved gently to Lassie's chin and rose her head. Lassie winced and clenched her mouth shut, not wanting anything to do with this.

“Let me go! Or else!” she snarled, the male dog just chuckling to himself at the idle threat.

The female however was much more relaxed and accommodating. “Oh sweetie, why do you have to act like this. Don't you remember us?” she asked and Lassie's face wrinkled as her nose scrunched slightly.

“No, why should I?” she snarked. The female brushed her paw gently across Lassie's face, the latter trying hard to pull her face away but to no avail.

“Oh... I've waited so long to do that again... I missed you so much darling,” she spoke lightly and with a loving tone but Lassie was still not having any part of it.

“Enough! Woah... ohhh...” Lassie said, her world spinning as she lashed out. Shaking it off, she got back on topic. “What gives?! Who the hell are you?!” She demanded and a tear came to the other's eye.

“Y-you... you don't remember me?” she asked, almost heartbroken.

Lassie response was quick and snappy. “No! Why should I?!” The female nearly trembled with saddened emotions, tears building in her eyes.

“Darling... sweetheart... we're your parents,” she nearly burst into a teary wreck as she said that. Lassie however, called a bluff.

“Pfft, yeah okay. If you're my parents why haven't you been around?” she asked. Her mother's, or whom she claimed to be, response was a lot quicker than Lassie expected.

“We weren't allowed natural birth. We didn't have room nor the accommodation for infants here. It was forbidden and came with severe consequences. However I couldn't let them take away the life I had given to the world. We kept it our secret, you father and I, and after only a brief time together we gave you to an animal orphanage,” she informed Lassie whom was still overly skeptical.

“Okay. So why bring me back?” she asked with deep uncertainty in her voice. Her mother, at this point, was in full blown tears, her father, or whom they claimed to be, was very unemotional on his part.

“Look at yourself. You're no longer an infant pup. You can take care of yourself. You can do more than take care of yourself. You can take care of others. Or sweetheart, we just couldn't wait to see you again!” she chimed as she pulled the restrained Lassie into a hug.

“So why didn't you come to get me yourselves?” she asked skeptically.

“Because we're not scouts honey. We can't leave home,” she replied and Lassie rose a brow.

“So why bring me here and tie me down?” she asked aggressively.

“Because we're not going to stay. We weren't positive we could have escaped with you when you were just a pup and let's face it, had we escaped ourselves and approached you claiming to be your parents, would you have believed us?” she asked and Lassie blinked, unsure what to believe if they had approached her on the outside world. “Exactly. We didn't want you to run from us. We wanted you to believe first,” she said, reaching around and using her claws to cut the ropes that restrained Lassie.

The father gasped. “What are you doing?!” he snarled and the mother shot him a glare.

“Releasing her, you buffoon. She's our pup. She won't run from us...” she looked back to her daughter. “Sorry about your father. He may come off as a rugged arse, but he's really sweet and gentle on the inside,” she told Lassie who just blinked, having trouble taking it all in.

“You... no... no this can't be,” she said, trying to deny it but also partially trying to accept it.

“Don't worry honey. I know it's a lot to take in, but just take it slow. Maybe start with these. It'll help with the headache. I know the scouts can be real hard on folks they catch,” she said, offering Lassie the pain killers and water.

At first Lassie went to refuse, then decided to take a gamble. It was a brutal headache after all.

Tossing the two pills in her mouth, she downed the water, taking the pills with it. The mother spoke again. “Honey, when you're feeling better, we're going to get out of here, leave this place behind.”

Lassie couldn't believe what she was hearing. Were these two really her parents? “I... I don't know...” she replied unsurely.

The father stepped up and offered her a set of clothes that almost looked like a gi of some kind. “Here. You may want some clothing,” he offered. Lassie took the clothing and just blinked, still unsure about all this.

The two stood and made towards the only door in the room. The mother turned back. “Oh and Lassie, when you're ready, we're having steak and ribs for dinner,” she mentioned, the information perking Lassie's interest.

“S-s-steak and... and ribs?” she stammered and her mother nodded, the father speaking up.

“It's probably better than anything you've had to eat so far,” he commented as they both left the room. It only took moments for Lassie to spring up out of her seat. The sudden movement disoriented her but she didn't much care. She hadn't ever had meat produce but like hay she wasn't going to let some motion sickness stop her from trying it.

In an instant she rushed out of the room and after her parents. From behind a secret one way window sat two pony brothers. Both had red fur and light yellow manes and tails. They had black shirts on and each had a blue and white stripped bow tie.

The first, whom had facial hair, spoke to his brother. “Do you think this will work brother?” he asked, the second nodding in response.

“Of course Milf. Our plans always work, do they not?...”

* * *

Evan's perspective...

“Raining... it just has to be raining...” I muttered as Derreck slowed Juggernaut to a stop. Rain was swept away from the windshield by the wipers but within a second was clouded with more rain droplets. We weren't exactly close to Manehatten, but we could still easily see the sprawling metropolis city lights in the distance.

It was a heavy downfall of rain, mixed in with constant thunder. I just grumbled to myself but Felix seemed worse off about the weather than I did. Every crack of thunder would make her jolt, a fine line of fur along her back springing up as she growled to herself.

Derreck shut Juggernaut down, her lights dimming out and the darkness of the night swallowing us up. “This is perfect. The storm will cover our entrance. We'll be in and out before they know what hit 'em,” he commented and I turned to Felix.

“Alright...” I said to myself, pulling out a knife.

“Hey! Woah!” she gasped as I neared her. “You said you'd let me go!” she cried out, hissing at me like a cat would.

“Relax... we still need your help,” I told her, slicing the restraints. She looked at her wrists that had previously been bound then to me. “Help us do this, and it'll be like revenge to those who caused your family so much pain and grief,” I told her but she merely scoffed.

“You mean Flim and Flam? Those two scam artists you work for,” she interjected and I rolled my eye.

“You know what I mean. Come on, won't it feel good getting back at these bastards?” I asked, removing the shotgun that was slung to my back. Derreck looked back to me, wondering what I was doing. “Listen close...” I began to instruct her on how to use Heather, also informing her of how buckshot had limited range but devastating power at said distance.

“You trust me with this thing?” she asked, taking the gun I offered her and racking the pump. I nodded.

“You have your reasons, and I have mine,” I replied. Derreck put the thick leather fabric scope covers on Trillium before stepping out of Juggernaut. I looked to Derpy. “Derpy... I know you want to help... just stay here with the truck,” I began and I could tell she was about to argue but I cut her off. “We're going to need a quick getaway, and I need you to make sure the truck doesn't get captured by some kind of patrol... can you do that for me?” I asked. She sighed and nodded reluctantly. I could tell she really wanted to help us out but things were about to get gruesome...

* * *

Third person...

Lassie chomped on the T-bone steak. To her it was the greatest thing she'd had in ages. “Mmm-mmm, that's good!” she chimed, her mother smiling brightly.

“Haven't you ever had meat before?” she asked but Lassie shook her head.

“Nah. Where I live it's mostly vegetarian. It's kinda like... taboo or something to eat meat. The best we get is probably eggs... but Evan always gets me lots of good food like popcorn and cereal and even shares his milk with me at breakfast. You guys are gonna love him.” She said through mouthfuls of chewed steak.

The father nodded. “Indeed. I can't wait to meet him,” he said with great interest.

Lassie nodded. “Oh yeah, you two would get along great. He used to be a bodybuilder or something but now he mostly just relaxes and drinks on the balcony, like he's retired or something. You guys are also gonna love Twilight. She used to be a star pupil but now she's a princess and she's totally quirky,” Lassie laughed.

“You live with a princess?” the mother asked and Lassie nodded, the father quickly speaking up.

“Do you think she'll be coming to?” he asked, the mother quickly jabbing him in the gut. Lassie rose a brow.

“Huh?” she asked, still holding a piece of half chewed rib in her paw just inches from her mouth.

The mother quickly spoke up to correct the father. “What he means is, do you think she'll be looking for you too?” she asked and Lassie shrugged.

“I don't know just yet. She went to Saddle Arabia with Celestia on princess business. But if Evan goes postal... which he just might, then that guy Derreck will show up too... he's kinda weird cause they're like... I don't know how it works but anyway, he'll probably either go looking with his friend Derreck or panic and call the guard... or maybe team up with Discord again,” she commented and the mother rose a brow.

“You also know Discord, Lord of Chaos?” she asked with great interest and Lassie nodded as though it was nothing.

“Oh yeah. Back a few months ago this crazy mare named Freeze totally messed up Baltimare so Discord, me and Evan... and Derreck, all went in and stopped her. It was totally awesome cause at first Discord betrayed us, then it turned out he was just trying to save Fluttershy, then he teamed up with us again and double crossed Freeze and he was totally like 'I'm not your kind of evil' and was like 'KA-BOOM' and blew her head of!” Lassie squealed, remembering the adventure.

The mother and father rose their brows. “Wow,” the mother spoke. “I never knew our little girl was such a hero,” she appraised her daughter to which Lassie nodded.

“Meh... yeah I guess... but most of the time we all just go and see movies or hang around, or break Evan out of the hospital,” she said, continuing to down her meal...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

We lay in a mucky bush just over one hundred yards away from a towering factory building. It was ominous to say the least. It stretched a couple dozen stories into the air, with several large window panels that glowed from the inside every so often.

“Man... I already hate this place...” I whispered. Felix lay beside me and Derreck beside her. Felix had my shotgun and Derreck had the deathly black Mosin PU sniper rifle, Trillium.

“Okay...” Derreck began and looked to the building. “How do we get in there without creating too much of a ruckus?” he asked.

Felix looked to the building. “Three or so stories up there's an exterior ventilation grill that leads into the building's interior ventilation shaft work,” she informed us. Derreck spoke up.

“Okay... but we're not cats... how do we get in?” he asked. Felix had a simple answer.

“I'll sneak in, then I'll come back down and open a door for you guys,” she offered. I nodded but then looked down below where there were over two dozen patrol units on duty. Most looked like rats.

“What about the patrols?” I asked, a flash of lightning streaking in the distance and illuminating the factory yard.

“Easy,” Derreck said as he peered through the rifle's scope.

'What is he doing?!' I thought to myself. Surely one of the patrols-

My thoughts were cut off as a boom of thunder crackled, along with the thunderous report of Derreck's rifle as he triggered a shot. One of the lone patrols fell but no one seemed to notice. Felix and I both smirked, Felix speaking our minds.

“Brilliant. Using the thunder to mask your shots, no one will hear us coming. We just gotta make sure none of them see the dead bodies,” she appraised but Derreck didn't answer. A few moments later another flash of lightning, soon followed by a crack of thunder that was timely simultaneous with a gunshot. Another patrol fell almost instantly, still unbeknownst the the others.

Derreck racked on the buttery smooth action of Trillium, still peering through the scope and holding the rifle in an unwavering grip. There were several lights down in the factory yard, but none were quite bright enough to illuminate the fallen. The only thing bright enough was the flash of lightning but I had a hinting suspicion these goons weren't really suspecting us just yet.

Another crack of thunder and a rat patrol fell silently. The thunder had been so close I barely even heard the rifle and here I was right next to it. These rats wouldn't be able to even know where we were hitting them from. The bush, for the most part, concealed the muzzle flash of the rifle while the thunder concealed the gunshot.

Another rat fell in conjunction with a crack of thunder but a nearby patrol spotted an earlier kill. At first he didn't seem overly worried, possibly believing his deceased friend to be just napping. “Derreck, over there,” I said, pointing out the suspicious patrol that was going to investigate his deceased comrade. Derreck didn't even wait for a crack of thunder and fired. The rifle let out a thunderous discharge that startled many of the patrol, and ripped the already suspicious patrol to the ground with a fine hole in his chest.

Derreck licked his lips as he racked the bolt. After a few more moments a flash of lightning glimmered in the nearby distance and the patrols down below took the gunshot as just another crack of lightning.

Moments later another patrol rat fell silently. One by one, and only rarely in pairs, all the patrols were dispatched. Felix smirked with a razor sharp grin. “Slick... watching those bastards go down almost makes me forget I'm soaking wet,” she commented as she stood up but Derreck yanked her back down.

“Hold up...” he said. I could see the hair on the back of his neck prickling up, along with the feeling of my own hair prickling up. A minute past and Felix looked to me.

“What is it?” she asked and I shrugged unknowingly. All I knew was that something was off about this. Just before we could speak, we heard rustling in the brush a few feet beside us.

“I'm telling yah, I saw something flashing up here,” one voice spoke.

“It was probably nothing,” said a second. I felt a shiver run down my spine as two large rats came into view. Celestia! They were almost the size of a large dog.

“Wait!” said the first as he stopped, holding back the second. “Smell that?” he asked, both of them sniffing the air audibly. Derreck began to slowly shuffle sideways, at a pace that would make a turtle look about as fast as a hare.

“Yeah... what do you think it is?” asked the second.

“I don't know... smells pretty bad though,” said the first. They began to walk cautiously forwards once again, directly towards our positions, wielding what looked like classic crossbows. A flash of lightning blazed in the background, illuminating everything as though it was day.

In a brief motion Felix was on her hindlegs, the shotgun I lent her wielded in her forelegs. The rats gasped just as Felix triggered the first blast. The muzzle flash was blinding, leaving a singed vision of her in my view. The crack of thunder seconded the shotgun blast not even a second later, followed quickly by another fatal blast from the shotgun.

The blasts of magnum buckshot yanked the rats clean off their paws and launched them back a few feet, a gaping blast cavity in each of their chests. Derreck settled, the hair on our necks resting down. “Nice shootin' Tex,” Derreck praised and Felix looked to him strangely.

“Tex?” she asked but he just shook his head as he lead us down the embankment and to the factory. We crept through the shadows, occasionally pulling a dead body behind a dumpster or container and out of immediate sight.

Reaching a wall with a single set of doors, we looked to Felix who spoke. “Okay, just wait here. I'll be back in a jiffy!” she said but just before she could begin ascending the wall, Derreck grabbed her.

“You're not down here in ten minutes, we're going in guns blazing,” he told her and she just laughed.

“I don't think you brought enough ammo. We'll have to go down to the furnace core and disrupt the cooling system. That'll make the core unstable and it'll start to overheat. We'll have roughly four or five minutes to get out before the place blows sky high,” she told us and we both rose a brow. “Hey... you said yourself, it'll feel good getting my revenge on these bastards. Now sit tight, I'll be back before you can shake a leg.”

Derreck and I watched her leap into the air like some kinda ninja. She ascended the wall as if she were a spider or something. In seconds she reached her mark. Pulling off the ventilation grill she crawled into the shaft works. I was so impressed with her skills that I almost didn't notice the metal grill falling down at us. I jumped to the side as it smashed into the ground, clanging about loudly. “Sweet Celestia!” I hissed.

“Ain't that somethin,” Derreck mused to himself. We waited a few minutes, checking my watch every so often. “You know... she said...” he looked down and went to shake his leg. No sooner had he went to do so, then the door swung open. Felix stood in the doorway with a smirk, looking to Derreck whose leg was slighty risen as though to give a shake.

“Told yah so,” she quipped and Derreck nodded with an impressed expression.

“Not bad, not bad. Come on let's go. And remember, we're also here to save Lassie, so don't go killing every single thing you see,” he ordered...

* * *

Third person...

The two devilishly corrupt brothers sat around the security monitors as one of the guards pointed to a monitor. “There sir, see? Looks like we got visitors. I can have a full security detachment on them-” but Malf cut him short.

“No-no... no this is fine. Milf, my dearest brother, would you mind getting it... ahem, him, online? I think it's finally time for a test trial,” Malf told his brother who was quick to oblige the orders. Malf stepped back from the monitor screen with a smile, he too making his way out of the room. “Oh, do try and lure them to the main atrium. I want to give him a grand entrance,” he said to the technical officer who began electronically locking doors...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

We stopped at yet another locked door as Derreck jiggled the handle. “Shit... locked again...” Derreck muttered as he played with the Eagle Eye gadget. “Dammit, we can't stay in this hallway forever. We're bound to run into a patrol,” he muttered and Felix spoke up.

“They're locking the doors electronically... herding us where they want us to go,” she mentioned and I smirked.

“Like rats,” I punned and she chuckled.

“Ironic isn't it?” she asked but we all stopped as we heard steps coming along the metallic hallway floor. Derreck huddled us down and pulled a large cardboard box over the three of us, of which I had no idea where he got.

A lone rat strolled down the hallway, passing our box as though it was nothing. Emerging from the box, Derreck took the sling from Felix's shotgun and crept after the rat. In a flash of motion, he yanked the sling around the rat's neck and yanked, the force enough to break the rat's neck and render it lifeless.

“More than one way to kill a rat...” he commented, dragging the rat's body aside and hiding it under our box. He pilfered through the rat's utility vest which housed a few miscellaneous items, but one such piece was vital to our escape.

It was a keycard. “Eureka!” Derreck said, leaving behind the box with the dead rat inside as we moved on. These rats were huge and were undoubtedly going to give me a phobia for the rest of my life.

“I swear to goddess, if I don't see another rat in my life...” I commented as Derreck stopped by another locked door. Swiping the keycard, the door lock beeped at him negatively.

Shuffling across the hallway he tried another door, it to denying us entrance. We couldn't just go making a ruckus, kicking down doors and such. We needed to be stealthy, though I wondered if any of the security cameras had spotted us yet. They had to have, that's why the doors were locked and we were being herded... unless the security operators were out on break and it was just coincidence the doors were locked... unless this keycard didn't grant us access to those rooms.

After the fourth or fifth door, one finally opened and we slipped inside. The door closed behind us and the lights inside quickly flickered on. Inside was some kind of... sick science laboratory. There were... creatures inside big liquid vat holding tanks.

A gut wrenching feeling came over me as a shiver went down my spine. At first there were things like dogs mixed with cats, cows with octopus tentacles but soon there became horrific failures of things that I supposed were supposed to look like gargoyles...

After a very brief scan of the area I spotted something that perked my interest. It was kind of out of place. Most of the creatures here looked like biological failures but this...

I walked up to the tank, which didn't have any liquid inside but rather a few electrical wires. The... embodiment inside... it looked like me! The containment cell was labeled '101'.

“Impressive, is it not?” asked a voice. Derreck, Felix and myself spun around, Felix and Derreck pointing their weapons to the voice. In the doorway stood a rat... the same rat that had kidnapped me and taunted me at the loading yard warehouse by Ponyville.

He was holding a small crossbow that was aimed in our direction. “Come now, be sensible. I hear those boomsticks of yours are quite loud. Wouldn't want the entire security detachment coming down on your heads... anyway, where was I?” he asked out loud.

With a snap, he smiled, beginning to walk around us but still keeping his distance. “It all started with bovines, specifically the bulls. My creators wanted to build a powerful army they could sell to private investors... and what better than to have an army of brutes. Soldiers more powerful than any pony... of course, there arose problems with their... instability once it came to a mature age. Temperament issues you see. So they began playing around with all sorts of animals, genetically producing them. After a short while they began splicing the DNA of animals to get their best traits, trying to make soldiers with the best quality skills like speed, strength and stealth abilities. Of course, being the geniuses they are, my creators finally found the perfect specimen for an army,” the rat said boastfully.

Derreck's finger rested on the dangerously crisp trigger of Trillium.

“You see... rats... rats can be taught. Rats can do things for you. They are the greatest species to roam the planet. Able to adept to nearly any condition, an plentiful enough to overcome nearly any army. You ever hear the old saying about rats?” he asked and I spoke out in a disgusted tone.

“When there's one, there's a dozen,” I stated and he nodded.

“Exactly. Our reproductive capabilities were greater than any other. A litter could reach anywhere from eight to fourteen. Gestation periods are usually less than three weeks and the female can breed immediately after birth... no need to purchase more troops when your army simply keeps duplicating itself. Of course, our genetics had to be spliced and recoded. What good is an army of soldiers that can be simply squashed under a hoof. With our new genetic coding we can grow as tall as a pony. We were also far more loyal and less temperamental than other species,” he said and I snarled my lips slightly.

He looked to me then snickered. “Dogs though. They could be far more vicious than any rat and fiercely loyal... however, whom their loyalty lied with was another story... which brings me to your... pet, Lassie. Or as we know her, Canidae oh-six-seven. There's probably something you should know about her... and her parents...”

* * *

Third person...

Lassie skipped along through the hallways. Although technically still a prisoner, she couldn't be happier. Soon enough she was going to escape with her long lost parents and go back to living with Evan and Twilight.

Hopping along in a gleeful manner that may be mistaken with Pinkie's, she bounced up towards her parent's room door. Just before opening it however, she heard voices coming from inside, that of her mother and father.

“Just play the part a little longer, we need her convinced,” said the mother, to the scoffed reply of her father.

“I don't see why. What does it matter whether or not she believes us. That man is going to come looking for her regardless,” the father snapped back. Lassie pressed her ear up against the door, getting a better audio of what they were saying.

“It does matter. It'll be easier to keep her here if she doesn't know what's going on!” the mother snapped back.

“Who the hell says we even need her alive. It'd be a whole lot easier if they had just left a ransom note but just killed her off and left her in a dumpster. Who's to say that guy even knows where to start looking?!” he snarled and Lassie held back a gasp.

“Don't even say such things!” the mother snapped back and the father again just scoffed at her remark.

“Don't tell me you're getting soft on her. She's not even-” he was cut short as Lassie's weight against the door cause it to swing open and her body crashed to the floor. Blinking and looking up to them, who both looked down her her, she giggled nervously.

“Uhh... hey... just came to tell you how much I love you... heh-heh,” she stammered nervously, but she could see it in her father's eyes. With a gulp she spun on the floor and delivered a brutal kick to his gonads. “Toodles!” she chimed before zipping for the door, only to crash into a guard rat.

“Going somewhere?” the rat asked in a deep voice. Lassie swallowed hard as the bulky rat grabbed her in his massive arms and began to squeeze. She gasped as the air was squeezed from her lungs, but as fate would have it something helped her spring free.

Like a crack of thunder, a monstrous gunshot went off and echoed down the hallways, making the rat jump and lose his grip on the canine. Lassie skittered away feverishly, racing down the halls and past other rat guards that rushed along after hearing the gunshot.

Lassie's father rushed into the hallways as well. “GET THAT BITCH!” He boomed....

* * *

Just moments earlier,

Evan's perspective...

Derreck stood idle, Trillium's barrel wisping out a puff of smoke. The rat lay on the ground, a gaping hole in his head. “CELESTIA! Derreck!” I yelled and he just shrugged, even Felix in slight shock.

Derreck mused to himself. “I couldn't stand his voice.” He pressed a button on the side of Eagle Eye before turning to us.

Felix spoke up. “The whole factory is gonna come down on our heads. You guys go get your dog, I'm gonna set off the furnace core,” she informed us before scurrying off and down the hallways.

Derreck and I rushed off. “So where do you think she is?” I yelled and Derreck shrugged.

“Dunno. Let's follow our noses,” he replied and my jaw nearly dropped at the stupid idea but he seemed to have a mind of his own, pulling me along through hallways and through several rooms, including one which I presumed was the mess hall. Though mostly rats living here, it smells quite nice.

We came up to a large set of metal doors that blocked our path but Derreck merely barged through them. Coming to a stop, we found ourselves in a large room, more like a staging area or something.

Derreck looked around, scanning the place with that eyepiece of his. Before we could do anything however, a very suave voice spoke out. “Good evening gentlestallions... or perhaps I should say goodnight.” We spun, Derreck going for his rifle.

At the doorway that he had barged through stood a lone stallion whom was red furred with a creamy yellowish mane and tail, yet he lacked any facial hair. His shirt was black with a blue and white striped bow tie. “Ah-ha... I get it. Cause Flim and Flam are yellow with red... bah, never mind,” I muttered and the stallion scrunched his nose at the mention of the F brothers' names.

“Yes... quite. I will say you two have made a very daring rescue attempt but I'm afraid it ends here.” His words seemed so smooth, so confident yet it made Derreck chuckle.

“Hmm... ha. And I suppose you're going to try and stop us?” he remarked but the stallion chuckled and just shook his head.

“No. Hardly. But I do believe my friend here will stop you...” he trailed off as a bipedal figure entered the room. He walked with slow strides, each step casual yet terrifying to watch. His skin looked smooth as a baby's. He wore a black leather jacket with matching pants and dark boots over his feet. The theme to the original Terminator movie thunked in my head.

A slick dark brown flattop hairstyle covered the top of his head, along with a pair of black sunglasses that covered his eyes despite being inside and not that bright. His hands clenched and I gulped. He looked like... like me! “We first started off with the one hundred and one series, or the one-zero-one if you will. However, it's advanced learning computer led to... complications related to pony-like emotions...” he stepped back and pointed to the man in front of us, as though to present him.

“Allow me to introduce you to the 1000 series,” the stallion stated. I swallowed hard. “I suppose you already know about our biological research,” he commented, having must've watched us over the security cameras. “Though I'm sure your new found rat friend didn't tell you about our bio-mechanical research,” he said, the hulking man standing idle beside him.

“You see, throughout our exploration of animal creations we always ran into the problems of skilled attributes. One animal would have speed or strength but lack something else. We tried several times with splicing DNA gene codes but that often ended horrendously. Then something most... wonderful happened. An entire mob family was wiped out in just a few hours time by a single assailant-” I cut him short, already knowing what he was referencing.

“There was actually two of us,” I butted in and he rose a brow.

“Oh yes... that's right... anyway. Several more stories arose shortly there after. One of a mare freezing Baltimare that was subsequently defeated, then again of a creature from another world ascending to the top of Mount Tia... we, my brother and I, thought to ourselves... only a machine could work with such precision. Operate on a level far above that of any pony... and then it dawned upon us. Machines. Why create an army of flesh and blood when you could have an army of one... one soldier that could complete any task giving to it. One soldier that could fight an entire war by itself... just imagine it...” he trailed off in his own sense of brilliance. I'd have to admit, it was kind of clever.

“A universal soldier... and what better identity to give him than that of the creature whom performed so many perfect accomplishments?” the stallion mentioned.

Derreck fired his rifle at the big hulking man, his head getting cocked to the side from the impact, his sunglasses shattering. A moment later he turned back, a gash in the skin on his forehead but beneath the skin lay metal.

“Hmm... now you see. On the outside he is the perfect form. Strong, powerful and terrifying. Living organic flesh. But on the inside he's a-” but the machine cut him short.

“Hyperalloy combat chassis.” The machine's voice spoke with a near perfect Schwarzenegger voice that made me groan. We were screwed. The stallion sighed.

“Yes... thank you for that... anyway, like I was saying. Hyperalloy combat chassis, comprised of dense metals and composites that make him immune to most forms of magical attacks or physical ones... including that of your firearms... you may as well say he's indestructible,”

I leaned over to Derreck. “We need to find a metal press and crush it with that, then quote 'You're terminated fucker',” I mentioned.

“Hardly the time for jokes,” Derreck mused and I shrugged.

“These guys are the ones that ripped the idea of the terminator,” I replied and Derreck rolled his eye.

“Well, I'll let you three talk it out. One thousand, go to it,” the stallion said as he wisped out of the atrium, or whatever this place was.

The cyborg, or whatever, charged at us with high speeds that could only be matched by a cheetah. Derreck fired a shot that pinged off the machine's head, then another that struck its chest. Both impacts didn't even faze the machine and it plowed into the two of us, skidding us across the ground.

Trillium slipped from Derreck's grip and skidded across the floor. I groaned, the impact force having hit me pretty hard and spun my clock. I watched in horror as the machine took a single leap, closing the large gap between itself and Derreck and plowing it's weight down on my big friend, a crater forming beneath them.

It hammered several powerful punches into my friend's face before heaving him up with a single hand and throwing him against a wall several feet away. Despite the distance, his throw gave Derreck enough momentum to dent the thick metal wall.

Looking to me, it picked me up by the hide of my duster and threw me as well. My body slammed with unforgiving force against the metal wall. I wasn't sure how I wasn't dead from the force but I almost wished I was. Derreck and I both tried to get to our feet, but only managed to get to our hands and knees, blood dripping out of my mouth.

Pain ensnared my body as the machine idly walked over and heaved us both up by the neck then promptly tossed us out the window. The glass pane shattered apart and I saw the glistening shards of glass flutter around us as we fell several stories down.

I slammed with unrelenting force into the hard concrete ground below, groaning and again unsure just how exactly I was still alive. I heard Derreck muttering to himself. I looked over and saw him pressing two fingers to the ear piece of Eagle Eye. “Juggernaut... to me,” he grunted.

In the distance I heard the rumbling echo of a diesel motor, along with the bright beams of light that pierced the storm's darkness. A heavy armored truck crashed down the hill and busted through the perimeter gate of the factory. Pulling up beside us I blinked in disbelief.

He staggered to his feet and looked to me. “Grab that old levergun of yours!” he ordered just as Derpy hopped out of the truck.

“Evan! Are you okay?!” she asked worriedly as I staggered up and over to the vehicle.

“Yeah... yeah I'm doing alright Derpy,” I replied honestly. I wasn't feeling the greatest but I was okay... somehow. I grabbed Daisy and emptied all the cartridges from the rifle. Counting them out, I cursed to myself. I only had five shots.

I didn't bring ammunition for the gun, as Derpy had brought it along when she stowed herself away in the truck. I thumbed the shells back into the rifle's magazine but left the chamber empty. Even now I had no intent of firing the rifle but for different reasons. With only five shots we would be seriously outdone. Felix was right, we didn't bring enough ammo.

“Derpy, get outta here. There gonna be looking for us,” I told her but she protested valiantly.

“But I haven't done anything yet!” she whined. I took her into a brief hug, kissing her forehead.

“You've done good by me Derpy, you've done good by me.” With that Derreck and I rushed back into the building, my grip on my rifle unrelenting. I had high hopes we didn't run into that machine again.

Bustling down the corridors and hallways, we did our best to avoid any trouble. Before long however, the whole factory shook like an earthquake had struck it. “Ohhh... that's gotta be the furnace reactor or whatever,” Derreck mentioned and we both knew our time was short to find my companion.

We traversed quickly, moving at high speeds that got my heart racing. A gunshot went off nearby that nearly deafened us. “That way!” Derreck ordered as he led us towards the direction of the gunshot.

There was yelling and screaming nearby, more than usual anyways, considering that the whole factory was about to explode and that we had created quite a ruckus. We heard more yelling during some sort of confrontation along with another gunshot.

Derreck and I rushed around a corner and into a large room with several windows looking to the outside. The room looked empty for the most part but scared the shit outta me mainly due to the fact the floor was mesh grate flooring and I could see several floors down. Near the far end of the room was a railing that looked down below, possibly all the way to the basement. Near said railing was four figures.

Regardless to my fear of the flooring I rushed in with Derreck just as a large dog was tossing Felix across the floor. I gasped as I spotted Lassie and another dog nearby. “Stop it!” screamed the dog near Lassie, whom sheltered my friend like a valiant mother would her babies.

The large male dog racked the pump on Heather, whom he'd undoubtedly taken from Felix in their confrontation of which I never saw. “HEY!” I boomed. The dog, already standing on his hind legs, turned to me with the shotgun drawn.

'Oh shit...' I thought to myself as I realized I didn't have a shell chambered in my rifle. Just as he leveled the gun on me, a scream echoed in the room just as a glass pane was shattered. “NOOOOO!” the voice screamed out. I watched as Derpy plowed downwards and into the male dog whom flinched upon the impact.

As Derpy collided into him the shotgun went off. I felt my feet get pulled off the ground as I was tossed back. A great pain seared throughout my gut as I felt something painful strike the far right side of my lower abdomen.

I slammed into the ground, Daisy clattering just beside me. My ears were ringing as I stared blankly at the ceiling lights that beamed into my eyes. I mouthed out a prayer for my friend. 'Derreck...' my words never left my mouth but my conscious spoke up.

“I can't help you this time... this is something you'll have to do yourself,” it said to me. Tears flittered in my eyes, even my damaged one beneath that of my eye patch. The ceiling lights nearly blinded me like some kind of final holy light. Was this it? I didn't know. They say when you die your whole life flashes before your eyes. Nothing was flashing before my eyes. All I thought about were my friends that I was going to let down.

I heard screaming and yelling echoing faintly into my ringing ears. I tried to get up but the pain in my gut was so severe it nearly immobilized me completely. I didn't even want to lift a finger. I heard something that made the hair on my neck prickle. 'KA-CHUKE'. I tried to grab the rifle but my fingers slipped on the lever handle, making me cringe in pain.

I barely managed to lift my head as I looked forwards. The male dog drew his sights on Lassie. My heart sank as he began to squeeze the trigger. Lassie's eyes went wide, but just as the shotgun went off, a scream of despair echoed out and the female dog leapt in front of Lassie.

I watched in horror as the shotgun went off, striking the other female dog whom took the fatal blast of the shotgun in full and was tossed in front of my friend's paws. “Ugh... ahhh... Lassie!” I groaned to myself.

Anger, fury and rage coursed through my veins, having a greater effect than even adrenaline. My right hand grabbed on the forergrip of Daisy as I hoisted her up vertically, using the rifle as a helper to stand myself up. “You should have killed me first!” I whispered, staggering to a hunched position, which was all I needed.

Grabbing the underside of the lever, I ferociously yanked up on the lever. The gun actioned as I spun it upwards, the butt plate coming to rest perfectly against my shoulder while the fore-grip rested on my left elbow crevice. The bolt mechanism locked into place, a loaded round in the chamber. The exterior hammer was cocked back, almost as though the rifle had a devilish grin.

The blade sight lined up perfectly with the aggressive male dog. For the first time ever, I squeezed the trigger of the rifle, letting the hammer slam down freely on its own. Time seemed to slow as the rifle jerked in my arms.

The .30 caliber slug spat out of the rifle, a brilliant muzzle flash erupting behind it as it left the barrel. The bullet slammed into the side of the vicious dog, enough force transmitting itself through him that he was pulled over the railing and fell several stories down, taking my shotgun with him.

'Goodbye Heather...' I thought solemnly to myself. It was a small sacrifice and although I loved all my firearms, the value of loving sentient life would always come first. I stood idle for just a moment before the pain in my gut became nearly to much to bear and I staggered about.

Lassie sat in complete shock, tears coming to her eyes as she, like me, had trouble piecing together what just happened. “L-Lassie...” I gasped. Before I said much else, I noticed Derpy laying motionless nearby. “NGGH! DERPY!” I roared, nearly falling to my knees as I rushed over to her.

Reaching her side, I fell to my knees and cradled her body. “No... no please... no, don't... Derpy,” I began to weep as I held her limp body. After just a moment, I heard a slight moan.

“Your tears... tickle,” she whispered weakly. I leaned back, to be greeted by the wonderful sight of her smiling, although faintly. She wasn't gone. She wasn't even hurt... well, not badly anyways. There was no blood, not even a deep cut.

“Oh Derpy, I thought you were-” I was cut off by a slow clapping. I turned around, the stallion from before standing in the doorway to the room.

“Oh, how very touching. I'm so glad everything turned out alright for you all... well, it almost did,” he laughed. I waved Lassie over to me and sheltered both her and Derpy behind myself as the ominous presence of that goddess forsaken cyborg returned. The tune to the orginal terminator movie thumped in my head again.

'Shit...' I thought to myself. If Trillium couldn't penetrate that beast, than there was no way in hell Daisy could, especially with soft point ammunition. Felix groaned as she came too, gasping as she looked to our aggressors.

The stallion stepped into the room. “1000, kill them all,” he ordered. The machine stepped forwards and directly behind his master. Picking him up by the head with both hands, the machine hoisted the stallion up. The stallion's screams were subdued quickly as the cyborg twisted his neck violently, killing him instantly. I wasn't sure whether it was a glitch, or a misunderstanding of his order. 'Killed by your own invention, ironic.'

I gulped but Derreck stepped forwards. “I'll handle him,” Derreck said boldly as he clenched his fists. The cyborg began walking towards us and Derreck charged with a deafening roar.

The two collided and Derreck exchanged a quick set of blows with the machine before being backhanded and sent tumbling back. Bringing himself to a stop and widening his stance, his fists tightened as he snarled his lips, revealing razor sharp canines.

Charging forwards once more, the machine cocked back it's arm and swung at Derreck. My friend caught the punch with his left palm, his entire arm coated in a blue aura. The machine's face displayed an expression of shock as it's devastating punch was stopped dead with an almost effortless grip.

Derreck's right fist swung low and I felt a shiver of pain course through my body as I watched his wrist and knuckles shift. Three shiny blades emerged from between his knuckles. Unlike ever before they were no longer bony, but rather coated in a dark blue metal that fumed a blue misty smoke, almost like Luna's mane.

With a roar he swung upwards, the metal blades that protruded from his knuckles sliced clean through the cyborg's skull. It stepped back, staggering slightly. With a second roar, three more shiny blue metallic blades emerged from Derreck's left fist and he impaled the machine with both sets of claws, hoisting it up above his head.

With one final war cry, Derreck tossed the machine over the metal railing, letting it fall down to the pits below. I looked to him, veins bulging from his every muscle. The dark blue fuming metallic blades glistening. His fists unclenched gently, the sharp blades slowly retracting back into his arms and the wounds between his knuckles sealing shut.

His entire body seemed to slightly deflate as he relaxed. Felix groaned as she stood to her hindlegs, Lassie whimpering over the second dog whom lay lifeless. My friend began to whine louder as she licked the deceased dog's massive wound.

The whole factory shook as an eruption took place below. I looked downwards through the mesh floor to see a massive fireball erupting in the subterranean levels of the building. “Aww crap...” I muttered. Derpy groaned, Derreck rushing over and heaving her up onto his shoulder.

Felix staggered as a second eruption shook the factory. We rushed over to Lassie whom just sat on her haunches. “Leave me...” she whined, sounded defeated.

“Not-a-chance,” I replied heaving her up into my arms as she seemed otherwise reluctant to move. Derreck picked up the deceased dog, heaving her onto his other shoulder. Rushing out of the room, I scooped Daisy up on my way out as Felix, Derreck and myself made our way out into the hallways.

“We gotta get outta here,” Felix yelled and I nodded.

“Yeah, no shit!” Derreck replied as we began to rush down hallways, rats and other enlarged abominations scurrying around also, paying us no mind as we rushed along.

As we descended Derreck suddenly stopped and went the wrong direction. “Derreck, where are you going?” I yelled, the stairs in the opposite direction.

“We gotta get Trillium!” he yelled back and I nearly wanted to burst with anger. Had it been just him and me, I would've taken the risk, but now we were about to risk the lives of Derpy and Lassie as well.

“SHIT!” I yelled as I chased after him, Felix not following. Probably following the Eagle Eye map of this place, Derreck and I arrived at the atrium room, or whatever it was.

Setting Derpy and the deceased dog down, Derreck rushed into the room that had been set ablaze. Lassie squirmed in my arms. “You should have left me behind,” she said in a low self-esteemed way. 'Jeeze. What's gotten into her?' I wondered, about to ask but my thoughts were interrupted as a loud crash echoed, parts of the blazing ceiling crashing down in the atrium room. I thought again about asking Lassie what her deal was.

I didn't bother as I instead watched Derreck rush through the falling ceiling pieces and to the other end of the room where Trillium lay. Running back, he leapt over several fiery pieces of fallen walls and other such debris.

Slinging Trillium across his back as he hefted the nearly unconscious Derpy and the deceased dog on his shoulders, he looked to me. “Come on, what are we waiting for?!” he asked and I nearly boomed with anger over this stupid detour, regardless if it was for a priceless sentimental rifle or not.

“WE'RE WAITING FOR YOU!” I yelled as we quickly rushed to the emergency staircase. Even with the added weight of the others and our rifles, we leapt down entire flights of stairs in single leaps, quickly reaching the ground floor as the structural integrity of the building began to wean, ready to give way.

Rushing out the emergency exit, I howled in freight as the building began to shake, fiery eruptions bursting through window panes. “WHERE THE FUCK'S THE TRUCK?!” I screamed but no sooner had I said that, Juggernaut came screaming around the corner and skidded to a halt just in front of us.

Seconds later, the back hatch door opened and Felix waved to us. “You wanna live or what? Come on!” she screamed. It was all the motivation We needed as we hopped into the back of the vehicle and sped off, slamming the hatch door shut just as we slammed through a perimeter wall.

I looked through the back window, the horrendous eruptions continuing as we put distance between ourselves and the erupting nightmare factory. Derreck lay Derpy and the dog down as I did Lassie, whom rushed over to the other and began to whine to herself.

I leaned back with a groan. “Is everyone okay?” I asked, already knowing the fate of one. Derreck and Felix nodded, the feline driving the battle truck. Derpy groaned groggily. Derreck took a quick once over of her and nodded to me.

“She'll live,” he informed me and I looked to Lassie.

“Lassie, how are you doing?” I asked but she didn't answer. “Lass?” I asked but still got no response as my canine friend continued to weep over the dead one. I remembered he valiant actions today, for reasons I would never know. I hadn't even gotten her name. “We'll bury her... somewhere nice... it's what she deserves...”

* * *

Neighagra Falls...

We all stood around the final resting place of the unnamed dog whom had valiantly gave her life for Lassie. Even my canine friend hadn't gotten her name. She was always just told that this dog was her mother.

“She... said she was my mother... but she wasn't. They told me everything...” she cried. “Told me how I was a creation like the rest of them. Built for an army... built to kill... he tried to kill me but she... why?” she wept profusely and I rested my hand on her shoulder.

“Sometimes one's emotions are hard to understand,” I replied.

“She wasn't my mother but... but she loved me, protected me even,” Lassie cried. “You should've left me behind, I'm just a monster. A... a thing, created to kill,” she cried but Derreck shook his head.

“No, you're not,” he replied as he removed Eagle Eye from his head. Lassie nodded, her eyes clenched shut and still leaking tears.

“Yes I am. He told me!” she cried but Derreck knelt down beside her.

“Then he lied to you...” he said, placing the Eagle Eye on her head and setting the eye piece to a playback of when we met that rat in that... science room, where he told us everything...

* * *

“There's probably something you should know about her... and her parents,” the rat said as he kept his small crossbow leveled.

“You see, she was born naturally. Her parents were the ones who were biologically engineered. The pup, unlike any other, didn't show any signs of aggression whatsoever. In fact she had a very playful and loving demeanor. Seeing it more as a liability, our bosses ordered the pup to be exterminated. However her parents... they had grown an emotional bond to their child. The father died to ensure the mother and... whom you call Lassie, escaped. However we quickly picked up her trail and followed her all the way out to the Everfree. When we found her the pup was missing but we figured without its parents it would quickly perish, especially in an inhospitable place like that... but I suppose we were wrong. Finding out she was alive, we had to quickly act on it. If the public were to find out about our factory and operation NYMPHO, our entire plan would be jeopardized. And how nice of you to bring along another of our escaped creations,” he stated, looking to Felix.

“So what? What's any of that got to do with me?! Why are you telling me that?!” Derreck asked with a growing anger in his voice.

“You? Our bosses wanted you for more genetic coding. Useless really. You're not all they think you are, I can tell just from looking at your. Why am I telling you about Canidae oh-six-seven... I just thought you might want to know your friend was a spawn of death and destruction,” he laughed but no sooner had he said that, a gunshot went off, Trillium's muzzle flashing brightly as she spat a round right through the filthy rat's skull.

The rat lay flat on the ground, a fine hole in his head. Trillium wisped smoke out the end of her barrel as Evan's voice spoke up. “CELESTIA! Derreck!” his voice piped up. Derreck's voice spoke up shortly after.

“I couldn't stand his voice.” Derreck quipped before the video feed cut out...

* * *

Lassie blinked as the recording stopped, having played out in front of her as though it was her own memory. Finally coming to as Derreck removed the eye piece she just sighed depressingly. “So what if I was born or not. The rat was right. I'm just a killer like the rest of them,” she said in a low voice, ashamed with herself.

Derpy sat next to Lassie and held her tight. “No you're not!” she said sternly, taking Lassie by surprise. “Don't even think that about yourself. You're one of my bestest ever friends and I know you better than that. You're not a killer, not even close. You're a loving, caring friend who would look out for others,” she told her. Lassie went to interject but I stopped her.

“She's right you know. I know you better than anypony around. Heck, I pretty much adopted you. I've raised you since you were a pup Lassie. I've fed you... loved you... taught you important things in life, and never once would I even consider you a killer. Yeah, you're a little quirky, but who isn't?” I asked, referring of course to her sexual endeavors, and she looked to us.

First to me, then to Derreck, then to Felix and finally to our grey pegasus friend. “I... I...” she began and I looked to the grave.

“Just think of her. Your... who claimed to be your mother. Undoubtedly bio-engineered yet she grew a close bond to you even though she wasn't truly you mother. A bond so close that she gave her very life for you. She knew you were worth the sacrifice,” I told her and Lassie just blinked, things finally coming around for her.

“And just look at me,” Derpy said. “I may look funny and strange, and a lot of ponies think I'm dumb because of it but I'm really not,” she said and I nodded, taking her attention back to Derreck and I as I spoke again.

“Just look at me and Derreck. We're humans. Back on my world we destroy precious wetlands, drive other species to near extinction, genocide each other, destroy the environment. We are the literal carnation of evil... but that doesn't mean every single one of us is bad just because we're human. What you are doesn't determine who you chose to be. Lassie, I don't care what anypony, anyone, anything says. To me... you're the best dog in the whole world and I don't want that to change just because you think you're any different now than you were before,” I told her, taking her into a hug and starting to cry. Derpy joined into the hug and for the first time since this whole ordeal started, I got to see Lassie smile back.

“Thanks you guys... this means the world to me,” she cried. A musical beat began to play from Juggernaut's radio and Derreck began to sing, snapping with both hands as he gave a bit of waver to his pace, dancing slightly to the classic beat.

“Listen baby... ain't no mountain high, ain't no valley low, ain't no river wide enough baby...” he began to dance to the old classic and Lassie hiccuped on a sob.

“You know... you're a horrible singer,” she giggled with joyful tears as Derreck danced like a dork. Not even moments later, Derreck, Derpy, Lassie and myself were all dancing together to the beat. Felix leaned up against Juggernaut and sighed to herself, shaking her head and closing her eyes with a grunt.

“Dorks...” she muttered but quickly realized she was snapping to the beat, one of her legs thumping along to. With a deep sigh, she too quickly joined us in the group dance as we all sang along.

“Just call my name, I'll be there in a hurry, you don't have to worry, cause baby there ain't no mountain high enough...”

* * *

Desert garage,

Sometime later...

We pulled Juggernaut into the garage, Flim and Flam splendid to see us. “YOU'RE BACK! YOU ACTUALLY DID IT!” Flam cheered and I nodded as we all stepped out of the vehicle.

Flim rushed up. “Are they gone? Is it really done?!” he asked excitedly and I nodded.

“You know... your cousins looked almost like you guys except their colors were swapped...” Derreck mentioned. Lassie came to my side and Flim looked to us.

“Lassie, are you okay?” he asked and Lassie nodded, leaning into my leg.

“Better now that I'm with friends,” she commented with a smile. Without even a single syllable or even a smile, Felix waved to us, giving us the peace sign as she walked away.

“Hey Felix, wait!” Derreck called out. She turned as he quickly rushed to Cadance, rooting through the backseat before quickly running over to her.

“You know... it's over now,” he said and she nodded. “Not many of us get the chance to start again... I'm giving you that chance,” he said as he held her paw out and placed a gold bullion in her palm. The last gold bullion we had from Peg Leg's treasure.

Her eyes went wide, along with Flim and Flam's. “Let it go... and find a new lease on life,” he told her. They embraced in a brief hug and I could read her lips giving him her thanks. After that she was off, hopping into her little beetle car that I had no idea was nearby.

I watched her putter away into the distant setting sun that cast an orange haze over the desert. Flim, Flam, Derpy, Lassie and myself all sighed. “Ohh, I have just the thing for this occasion!” Flim commented, clapping foalishly as he rushed inside, quickly coming out with a few bottles of soda pop.

They were ice cold, and even had condensation on the exterior of the bottle that dripped a little. Our group all took a seat near the side wall of Flim and Flam's garage, watching the desert sunset together.

This moment... was perfect. Things could have gone better sure but I wasn't about to complain about the outcome. We all popped the tops on our sodas with a soft POP. “Cheers,” Lassie said and we all leaned in to clink our bottles together.

“Yup,” I said.

“Yupp,” Derreck added in.

“Yep,” Flim and Flam both added in.

“Yup,” Derpy said as well. There was a short pause before Lassie spoke.

“Mhmm,” she finished.

After a short while we all finished our sodas and Derreck stood up. “Well, ladies and gents... I hate to split and run, but I have somepony I need to formally introduce myself to,” he said, giving us all a nod before beginning to walk away. I watched him as he slowly began to fade away into the setting sun.

Lassie leaned over to me. “You ever get the feeling he's not who you think he is?” she asked me but I just shook my head...

* * *

Elsewhere...

It was late in the night and Milf sat with two drop dead gorgeous, slender, blonde mares in the nightclub. His one foreleg was in a cast and he had a bruise on his cheek. “Well, you know gals, it's been a rough couple of days and it's really drained me, both physically and mentally. But you know what they say, no rest for the wicked,” he commented with a laugh, the mares rubbing into him affectionately.

“But that's not gonna stop me from having the night of my life with you gals. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to use the colt's room,” he said, standing up and making his way through the crowd and to the restroom.

Making his way to the wall urinals with a hum, he unzipped his pants and raised his leg, relieving himself with a sigh. Just as he finished up and was zipping up his pants, the lights flickered out.

One of the stall doors opened silently as Milf blinked. “Ugh... what the hell?” he muttered to himself. 'This is supposed to be the best nightclub around, yet the power goes out...' he thought to himself as he turned around, only to have the triangular barrel of a hand cannon pointed to his face. The gun glowed faintly as it hovered just inches from his face in the grips of a burly man.

His mouth went slack as he gasped, looking to the man who stood in the darkness of the shadows that now enclosed the entire washroom. A faint smile came across the man's face. One of his eyes Milf couldn't see but the other was fuming darkly, blue mist emitting from it and a terrifying slanted pupil looking at him.

He stepped back with another gasp, the hand cannon still leveled on his head. He spotted a white skull on the chest of the man's shirt and that was the last thing he ever saw...

Author's Note

I did have this done Sunday but it took me the last two nights after work to edit it. Added to that, this chapter was kinda tricky for me because originally I was never going to have Lassie in the story, she just came along when I wanted the character to feel nostalgia for his old world with a dog. The when I put her in and made her talk along with the sexual prowess I was going to make her related to that one female diamond dog Evan helped in the earlier chapters (I think it was 17-18), and it was also going to involve Discord but then it just became far too complicated the more I thought about it, but then I remembered early on I kinda wanted to have Flim and Flam have a bitter rivalry with their own family (And that's why they were put out of business, have the abandoned loading yard that no longer gets used, live in a run down garage out in the desert, etc.) but I eventually scrapped that idea too, yet I had already started into it when Flim and Flam spoke about the 'NYMPHO' experiments so I just kinda pieced this chapter all together with scraps... I dunno, it seems pretty good to me, whatta you guys think? (I have a feeling I'm gonna regret asking that...)
Anywho, cheers everyone.:trollestia: (Pretend that's Lassie looking at you guys)

Chapter 55

'A mixed blessing...'

Everything around me was dark, crammed, humid and rough. My hands were clammy, sweat also pouring down my face. I tried to stand but found myself to be nearly completely restricted save for the crawl space in front of me, as though I was in some kind of tunnel.

My breathing was heavy, raspy and loud. My heart was pounding in my chest, each thump feeling like a heart attack. I winced in pain, wondering where the hell I was. Trying to scream, I found myself mute, not a single sound leaving my mouth, not even a groan.

I caught a glimpse, something far off in the distance. A tiny microscopic light. Grabbing in front of myself, I began dragging my body along. My heart continued to thump in my chest at a painful pace, making my body sweat even more.

It felt like hours... maybe days, that I was crawling through that goddess forsaken tunnel. Even so, as I kept crawling, the light kept getting brighter and brighter. Finally reaching the end of the tunnel, I simply flopped my body out, quickly regretting that action.

My body began to rag-doll down a steep incline. Every so often my body would bounce, taking flight for several moments before crashing into what felt like sharp, jagged rocks and merely continue rolling along. My skin was torn and sliced open. Several bones felt as though they were broken, and all too soon I thumped into the ground with enough force to finally relieve a cry of pain, the first vocal sound to be released from my body since the start of this whole ordeal.

“ACK! GAHH! NGHH!” I winced as I gripped my left forearm, skin torn and just dangling about in flaps, blood pouring from my wounds.

Just as I thought all was lost, my skin began to sew itself shut, the flaps of skin reforming into their proper spots. My bones began to relocate themselves into the proper manner. It was a slightly painful process but within seconds it was done and I was left gasping in a pool of my own blood.

A deathly voice spoke out. “Impressive, isn't it?” I spun on my heels to face the voice's owner. A dark pony figure stood on all fours, a jet black cloak concealed his body. I took a combat stance, ready for a fight.

He chuckled briefly, not following suit and instead pulling back on the hood of his cloak, revealing his face... err, her face. She was a stylish looking mare, reflective light gray mane with a jet black fur scheme. “Relax...” she giggled. “I'm not here to fight you. I'm an angel,” she informed me. I took a step back and she giggled further. “Don't believe me? Just watch,” she mentioned, lightly stomping her hoof.

The scenery around us suddenly changed to that of Canterlot, namely the castle. “See? This isn't really happening by most standards, it's just a dream of sorts,” she informed me and I finally relaxed, my arms falling to my sides as I let out a relieved exhale.

“So... you're an angel?” I asked. She closed her eyes and smiled brightly with her glistening white teeth, while waving with one of her front hooves.

“Mhmm,” she replied and I blinked. I held the holy necklace that was dangling around my neck. “You know, it's been some time since you've sat down and had a chat with the lord,” she informed me and I just rose a brow.

“Is that why you came here? To tell me I should pray more often?” I asked but she shook her head.

“No, I was just making mention of it. No, my business with you is far different,” she told me and I cut in.

“Okay... shoot,” I offered and she stomped her hoof, bringing us to the Ponyville library. Inside I saw Spike, Lassie and my mother dozing peacefully. After a moment of just looking, I turned to the mare. “Okay, so what's the deal?” I asked, puzzled by what her business with me could possibly be if she was showing me my family.

“Well... your life is about to change,” she told me and I rose a brow.

“Well... considering I'm from another planet, and the fact I'm one of the only humans in Equestria... I'd say my life already changed,” I replied with a chuckle and she gave me an unimpressed stare.

“Drastically,” she stated and stomped her hoof yet again. We were teleported to a field where Twilight lay on a blanket, smiling contently to herself as she looked to the tall grass of the pasture field.

Out in the field, a sprightly young colt hopped through the field, taking a moment every now and then to look around, as though searching for something. I scratched my head in thought. I hadn't saw that colt before, not even at the school... he looked to be the age group of Scootaloo and the others.

He continued to trot through the field. He stopped again after another few steps to look around, but as he did, a dark burly bipedal figure stood up behind him from the grass. Without so much as a warning, the figure grabbed the colt by the midsection and held him into the air with a roar, the colt squealing.

My face went pale for just a fraction of a second before I realized that the colt was squealing in delight. A further inspection of the figure revealed him to be human, about 6'2” and with a heavy build, though he looked quite old, in his 60s for sure. Though despite his age he looked extremely healthy and didn't seem hindered by his age. “Gotcha!” he laughed and in that moment, that single moment his voice reached my ears, I realized it. That man was me!

The colt giggled wildly. “I'm supposed to find you!” he squealed and the man, me, just nuzzled his nose against the colt's.

A voice chimed out from the grass nearby. “HA-HA, you kissed a colt!” laughed a remarkably familiar voice.

“SCOOTALOO, I SEE YOU!” The colt cheered out and there was a short pause before the voice called back.

“N-no you don't,” it replied and the colt pointed to the grass.

“Yeah, you're right there. I can see your wings!” the colt giggled. My eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets as I watched an older version of Scootaloo stand up from the grass. She was so different than I remember her being.

Her wings were developing and nicely tucked in at her sides. Her mane was groomed slightly more like Rianbow Dash's but just a bit longer than the cyan pegasus's. Overall she looked to be in her teen years. Whipping her mane out of her sight she huffed. The older version of myself sat the colt on his shoulders.

“Aww come on, that's not even fair!” she pouted, only for another distinctly familiar voice to speak up.

“It totally counts, Chicken,” laughed a voice, the young colt calling out.

“Sweetie Belle, I see you too!” he called out and the young mare sat upright in a flash.

“No you didn't, you just heard me...” she trailed off as she realized she had revealed her position, only making the colt snicker in delight. Sweetie Belle pointed to the grass right next to her. “SPIKE'S RIGHT HERE!” she called out, followed by a laugh. I heard a voice grumble irritably.

“AWW, Sweetie Belle, why'd you do that?! He would've never found me,” Spike groaned as he sat up. My jaw nearly hit the floor as I watched the adolescent dragon stand up. He had changed so remarkably, and admirably as well.

His body was toned nicely, like it had been chiseled from stone. His biceps were nicely shaped yet not over sized. His pectoral muscles bulged beneath his chest crest and gave him a very masculine stature. Though, even so, I could still see that cute baby dragon face of his.

They were... older!

“Woah...” I whispered and the mare beside me nodded.

“You may not know it, but you make a good father,” she replied and I blinked blankly. Curiously pointing to myself the mare nodded. “Yes you. That colt on your shoulders is you son... or well, rather your son to be,” she commented and I ruffled my own hair.

“I... I ha-have a... a kid?” I asked and she nodded.

“A son to be precise, reckoning you make the appropriate choices,” she commented.

“The... what?” I asked, still baffled by what she was telling me. She sighed.

“Nothing is set in stone. The future is not written and nor does fate fully exist. Every choice you make, every decision, every action... leads to one of many possible outcomes,” she said to me. I looked back to the field where the group walked back to the picnic table where Twilight lay.

I wondered to myself what she'd think of me. “Heh... she's a grandma,” I chuckled and the mare beside me just sighed.

“Jeez... you really are messed up,” she commented and I rose a brow, but she said nothing back. I watched as all the group sat around the blanket. Twilight and my older self sat next to each other on the picnic blanket as she levitated out a basket of food.

“Here everypony, I had Pinkie make this,” she informed everyone, the young colt clapping excitedly.

“Oh boy! Aunt Pinkie makes the best food in all Equestria!” he chimed. I rose a brow. 'Aunt... Pinkie?' I wondered to myself, figuring if she was his aunt, then that must mean his mother was a sister of some sort to Pinkie.

Twilight set out paper plates for everyone along with plastic utensils. As everypony started taking portions of food, the young colt turned his nose up at something as he pretended to gag. “YECH! I hate spinach!” he commented, only to the amusement of the others.

Scootaloo laughed. “Why? It's sooOOoooo good!” she teased, taking a big mouthful and chomping it down right in front of him. The colt stuck his tongue out with disgust. His father, me, rose his brow.

“You hate spinach?” he asked and the colt nodded. “You don't even like it one bit?” he asked in a foalish tone. The colt shook his head. “Not even one little tiny bit?” he asked in a whiny voice and still the colt shook his head.

“It's gross looking!” he mentioned, to which Twilight just laughed.

“But you haven't even tried it. How do you know you don't like it?” she asked and the colt just rolled his eyes.

“Just look at it. It's so... gross looking... and green,” the colt commented, only to the faint laughter of my older self.

“He sounds like Rarity now,” the old man chuckled, to which my mother just nudged him. Looking back to my apparent son, my mother spoke.

“If you don't eat your greens, how will you ever grow up to be big and strong like you dad or Unlce Spike?” she asked and the colt just sighed. 'Wait... Uncle Spike? How the hay are Pinkie and Spike related?' I thought silently.

“Fine... I guess I'll try it,” he grumbled. Twilight giggled slightly as she looked to me, the older me. Something in her eyes sparkled as she smiled warmly, my older self smiling back.

The two of them leaned in for a kiss and the colt groaned. “Ewww! MOM, DAD!” He complained and my heart skipped a beat, my stomach having a twisted feeling to it as I heard those words while a shiver went up my back, a cold tingly feeling going throughout my body. 'M-m-mom?' I thought to myself. “Twilight's his... m-mom? But she's... I'm her...” I gasped out loud.

The mare beside me just rolled her eyes with a sigh. “In due time, things will become clearer to you, and you'll have a different outlook on life.”

I continued to stammer. “But if she's his mom... and my mom... that means... we, but he... I...” I started to sweat a little. My hands began to shake. The vision, or whatever it was, faded away.

“That's just one outcome. Like I said, nothing is for certain. There is no fate but what you make,” she told me and I swallowed hard.

“S-so... I could... could maybe not have a foal with my mother?” I said shakily and she didn't answer directly.

“I can't answer that for you. Your life is your own and nobody can dictate what you do,” she mentioned. “But...” she trailed off and another vision started to come into view. The temperature dropped significantly, giving me a slight chill.

Rain started pouring down and it was hard for me to see. It was dark out, probably night. “If you do not change you ways, than your final destination will come earlier than expected...” she trailed off and lightning struck in the distance, lighting up a small stone plaque in front of me.

The lightning, along with the stone, startled me. I nearly had a heart attack as my heart started to race. The thunder roared and prickled up the hair on the back of my neck. Another flash allowed me to read what was inscribed into the headstone.

'In loving memory of: Evan Burdick. 1995-2015. Dearly beloved and forever to be missed'.

I staggered back and fell on my ass, scrambling back but backing into the mare who gave me an even colder chill as I touched her. I rolled around so that I could see her. “What... what is this?!” I gasped loudly and she shrugged.

The relentless downpour continued to soak me and the mare, her mane and fur drooping down, water dripping off the both of us. “Your final resting place. The destination of all mortals,” she informed me and I scrambled to my feet. Rain straightened out my hair, along with hers as we stared at each other in silence. Water trickled off my face, dripping down my eyebrows and soaking me to the bone.

“B-but! But I die?!” I gasped in freight and she again just shrugged.

“All mortals die,” she informed me and I gritted my teeth.

“But... but I die next year?!” I couldn't believe what I was seeing. This had to be a bad dream. She didn't answer and just continued to look at me with that damn stare. “Answer me! Why do I die next year?! How do I die?!” I demanded but she didn't fully answer my question.

“I can't tell you that. All you need to know is that the future isn't certain. There are things that are never meant to be answered or understood. Your path in life is your own and nobody else's. I do not have the power, hence I cannot dictate your path.” I staggered a bit but finally found my balance.

“Why... why are you showing me this?! You're not an angel!” I boomed, my anger starting to boil.

“Anger is a common symptom when one is told they may die. Just relax and know that I am indeed an angel,” she informed me but I'd have none of it.

“What kind of angel are you?!” I roared, getting up in her face but she didn't deter in the slightest as she answered without hesitation.

“I'm the angel of death,” she replied. A flash of lightning struck nearby and as it did, the entire setting was illuminated in a blue flash of light. Her features were revealed to me once more, but unlike before, she no longer had flesh. She was just bone, though deep within her eyes sockets burned a hellish blaze of fury. She headbutted me, hard. Her strike had enough force to send my world into complete darkness.

I could hear my scream, echoing in what sounded like a tunnel. My body plummeted downwards as my painful screams continued to leave my mouth...

I heard a crack of thunder and my body jolted upright, I found myself sitting in my own bed but that didn't help the feeling that lurched in my chest. I gagged loudly as I tried to gasp for air. My entire chest felt like it was crushing inwards.

I saw my right hand try to clasp shut but my arm seemed to have a muscle spasm of some sort as my arm stiffened up. My neck twitched and flexed and it was all I could do but clench my eyes shut.

My left hand gripped my chest tightly, squeezing hard. I tried to breath but found it overly difficult.

I flopped out of bed and began to sprawl out on the ground. I heard someone's voice call out in panic. I forced my eyes open to see an English Rough Collie rush to my side. I pushed on the floor with my left hand though I felt extremely weak, only managing to bring myself to my hands and knees.

A red haze seemed to blur into the corners of my vision as my chest further tightened up. “Evan!” Lassie's voice was distorted for some reason, maybe due to my current state. I reached up and barely managed to stroke her cheek before I felt myself fade away. Glimpses of fogged, hazy flashing lights shimmered in the background.

I heard several voices in the back of my mind as I simply stared into the darkness, every now and then another flitter of foggy flashing lights. They weren't like an ambulance's, far from it. They were all different colours. Some lights even being neon pink and green... this must be what an acid trip is like...

* * *

I awoke to the feel of something in my nose. Coming to, I realized it was a breather tube. “ACK!” I snorted as I pulled the tubes out. Looking around I quickly came to figure I was in a hospital, or something there of.

There was a constant and calm beeping going off beside me, no doubt what had woken me. I went to sit up but then noticed I had a bunch of monitor needles stuck in me. “GAH!” I screamed, quickly yanking them out due to phobia.

Not even a second had passed and the monitor flat-lined, seconds later several nurses rushed in along with a doctor... it was that stallion, that grey stallion whose leg I broke. Behind them came my mother, Spike, Lassie along with all of Twilight's friends.

They all stopped and looked in shock as I sat up and went to stand. Twilight was the first to speak, and judging by how her eyes were bloodshot and teary, I'd say she was in a terrible mood. “Y-y-you... you're alright?” she stammered. I blinked rather blankly, not sure exactly why I wouldn't be.

“Uhm... yeah, why?” I asked. Lassie rolled her eyes.

“Told you so. Dude's like an unkillable machine. He's just like 'I'm back',” she assured the rest of the group but Applejack shushed her with a nudge. It was only then that I remembered that horrible... dream, and then the... thing with my chest.

“Wha... what happened?” I asked, feeling a little under the weather as I went to stand up. Nurse Redheart placed a hoof against my shoulder.

“It may be best if you sit back down, Mr. Burdick,” she told me. I was going to protest but quickly figured maybe it was for the best. Laying back down, I looked to the group. By far Twilight looked the worst. The rest just looked worried.

Lassie spoke up in a playful demeanor. “Man, it was unreal, you were like 'RAAHHHHH!' the you were like 'GNARRRGHHH!' then you were like...” she began to act out something that looked like a foal having a temper tantrum. “But then you were like 'NGGHHHHH!' then you were like...” she grabbed her chest, as though having just been shot and fell to her knees. “And you were like!...” she fell to the floor but it was at this time Applejack gave her a hard shove, almost a kick, as her fooling around was causing Twilight to get further upset.

My mother rushed to my side but seemed hesitant to get close to me. “E-Evan?” she whimpered and I smiled faintly with a nod. Very gently, and slowly, she leaned down and hugged me.

I grabbed her back and brought her in tight. She obviously needed some love because whatever she was experiencing was pretty brutal. It's like she just had a family member die...

My thoughts trailed off as every expression left my face. I looked to Redheart. “What happened to me?” I asked, now curious to the events of... however long it had been.

She spoke with a very professional tone. “Early this morning you suffered what we presumed to be a severe heart attack. When you arrived you were in a state of comatose. We suspect your heart attack may have also induced a stroke of some extent...” she trailed off and I blinked. I could hear Twilight crying faintly against my shoulder.

“So...” I trailed off, queuing her to continue but she didn't. “I take it... it's bad?” I asked, a sinking feeling in my gut already making it's appearance. With a gulp, Nurse Redheart shrugged unknowingly.

“I... we don't... exactly know. We thought... due to your condition and state... the damage was extensive,” she commented and I shrugged.

“I feel fit as a fiddle,” I said sprightly but she rushed to my side, placing a firm hoof on my shoulder as though to stop me from any sudden movement.

“Sorry but... for your own safety and health, it's best if you stay in bed. Patients usually feel energetic after a heart attack and doing anything strenuous can be fatal...” she trailed off and held a hoof to her chin in thought.

I felt my mother's wet tears soaking through my hospital gown. “I'm gonna be fine,” I assured her but she just kept crying. I lifted her chin up so I could plant a soft kiss to her lips. “Mom, trust me... I've been through worse.”

The grey stallion spoke up in an irritated voice. “Just get it from him already!” he ordered and I rose a brow, Redheart scowling irritably.

“Get what from me?!” I asked in an overly aggressive voice, the doctor taking a step back. Nurse Redheart dipped her head in a sigh before speaking.

“I... have this... this hunch... of why this happened. Why you seem to be aging. Why... everything,” she informed me and I rose a brow. I did have a curious wonder to why I was starting to wrinkle and grey at such a rapid pace.

“Okay, shoot,” I offered.

“You may be succumbing to... you have a... can I get a blood sample from you?” she asked very politely, making me feel sure that I could say no.

The stallion doctor scoffed. “Just get the sample already!” he demanded and I shot him a squinty eyed stare, making him go silent for the time at hand. Turning back to Redheart I spoke.

“Why didn't you just get it while I was out?” I asked, figuring that would be the ideal thing to do.

“We... we tried but your body...” she began to explain it to me and it was as though a memory was playing in my mind...

* * *

Third person...

Redheart stepped in to protest. “You know for a fact he hates needles!” she told the doctor sternly whom just scoffed in reply, his scoff almost a laugh.

“You suggested it,” he snapped back and Redheart's face twisted into a frown.

“I suggested what might be happening to him, not that we should take a blood sample without his consent,” she shot back and the stallion just chuckled.

“Oh, come to your senses Redheart. We have the right to test him while he's comatose. Besides, what could possibly happen?” he asked with a laugh that was almost sinister. He had been wanting to get back at this man for sometime after their last encounter.

Very slowly, he lowered the tip of the needle towards the man's wrist. A smile came across the stallion's face, a dark smile. Savoring every moment of it, nearly salivating at the mouth, the stallion began to press the needle's tip against the man's skin.

At just that moment, the man's opposite hand shot out and grabbed the stallion's wrist, twisting it violently with an audible 'CRACK!'

The stallion yelped as his hoof went limp, the needle falling to the ground as he staggered back with another mortified scream. “THAT'S IT! I'VE HAD ENOUGH! TOSS HIM OUT!” He screamed and Nurse Redheart stood between him and the man whom was in her care.

“I told you to wait until he wakes up!” she snapped and the stallion just spat at the ground between her front hooves as he began to limp away. Stopping for a moment, he turned back to her with a glowing fury in his eyes.

“If... he ever wakes up!” he shot back before leaving the room in a fuming rage, slamming the door behind himself...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

The stallion scoffed as he held a hoof to his chest innocently. “I hardly believe I acted that sinister,” he implied, though the hoof held to his chest was the one I had undoubtedly damaged. It was currently in a cast.

“How's the wrist?” I asked snidely and he just shot me a glare before storming out of the room. “So...” I trailed off and looked to Redheart. “Natural muscle response?” I asked and she shrugged.

“I'm not sure what it was. It was almost like your body had a natural defense mechanism to protect you while you're unconscious,” she replied. I looked to the others, whom all stood in silence and in wonder.

“I feel pretty good... really good.” I looked to my mother and gave a smile. “I'll be fine,” I assured her but Redheart spoke up.

“Yes... and no.” We all looked to her. “I... if you would be so kind, I need a blood sample for further testing.” I blinked with a gulp.

“So... ah-heh-heh...” I chuckled nervously. “Ne-nee-need-needles huh?” I asked with a shudder and she nodded. “Well... what if... like, you got some blood in a dish or something?” I asked and she rose a brow.

“How exactly do you intend to retrieve blood for me to sample?” she asked. I looked around then pointed to a medical cart.

“Get me a scalpel and a dish,” I told her and she gave me a stunned look but did so anyway. Coming back with the items, I set the dish on my chest and my right hand held directly above it. Taking the scalpel, I gave my palm a light jab with the scalpel blade, but stabbed a little too hard and cut a nice one inch gash in my palm.

Fluttershy and Twilight booth peeped and covered their eyes with their wings. In shock, Dash's wings shot out and smacked Rarity in the face whom gave a disgruntled 'HUMPH!' Pinkie's mane shot up at the sight of blood, almost as though her mane had went electric and Lassie gave a 'YECH!' Spike also covered his eyes.

Applejack just groaned. “How did ah know he was gonna do somethun like that?” she mumbled to herself. I grunted slightly as I clenched my hand, blood dripping down in generous amounts for Redheart to study.

“That should be enough. Here,” Redheart offered me a gauze pad. Rather than apply it to my apparent wound, I instead used it to clean away all the excess blood, the slit in my palm quickly sealing shut.

Everypony just stood in silence and aww, Dash being the first to speak up. “WOAH! HOLY COW! DID EVERYPONY ELSE SEE THAT OR AM I GOING CRAZY?!” She shouted wildly as she rushed up. “He was just like... what?! How did you do that?! That's soooOOooo cool!” she chimed excitedly.

Redheart gulped. “I knew it...” she whispered and I looked to her.

“Knew what?” I asked but she didn't answer my question.

“I'm going to do some blood tests so I can be certain, then I'll get back to you.” With that she was off with her blood sample. I blinked and looked to the others.

“So... what's good?” I asked casually...

* * *

Third person...

The group sat outside Evan's room, the man sleeping for the time being. Twilight sat quietly, still feeling shaken up after the recent events. She kept her breathing steady and calm. Her hoof subconsciously gently rubbed circles around her belly. Pinkie Pie bounced up.

“Heyah Twilight. Are you hungry?” she asked, the question taking Twilight completely off guard as her body jolted in shock.

“Uhm... I uhh... well, come to think of it... no, not really,” she stammered in a somewhat shocked way.

“Oh, well I was just wondering. Do you have a tummy ache? Cause I saw you rubbing your tummy. If you have a tummy ache, I have some tummy ache candies. I keep them stored here for tummy ache emergencies,” she said in her usual bubbly, and accelerated voice, pulling a bag of little candies out from behind the seat.

Twilight shook her head. “N-no... no it's not that Pinkie,” she stammered, a little timid about the topic.

Pinkie gasped loudly. “Oooooh, I know what it is!” she chimed excitedly, and rather loudly, much to Twilight's further timidness. Pinkie's outburst caught the other's attention whom looked her way briefly. “You've got an itch! I have anti-itching powder for-” Twilight cut her short.

“No, Pinkie, I don't have an itch...” she said, further nervous due to everypony's attention being drawn to her. “I... I uhh... heh-heh... nervous twitch,” she chuckled but Applejack spoke up.

“Ah thought yer nervous twitch was that ear flippin' thang,” she commented and Pinkie nodded.

“Yeah!” the pink mare said inquisitively, squinting one eye and taking a good look at Twilight whom squirmed a little. “Is something wrong Twilight? You can tell us, we're your friends,” Pinkie replied. Twilight's teeth chattered a little and she quickly bit her lip.

'I-I'm pregnant,' her mouth moved but not a single syllable left vocally. The group all just looked at her. “I'm... I'm pregnant,” she whispered, so silent even Pinkie couldn't hear her.

Applejack spoke up. “Uhm, sugarcube, yer gonna have teh speak up. Yer quieter than Fluttershy,” she mentioned. Twilight swallowed hard. She wasn't so much uncomfortable saying it, as she was just nervous about the topic.

“I'm...” she took a deep breath before speaking. “I'm pregnant,” she told them. They all just stood in silence for a few moments. Lassie was the first to speak.

“Aww cool, I get to train my own little minion,” she joked and Twilight looked to her.

“You're not turning my foal into your minion,” Twilight commented but Lassie just snickered. As the information sunk in, the others were quick to give their praise to Twilight. Twilight felt comforted by her friends, enough so that she forgot for the time being about Evan's condition.

“Thanks gals. It mean the world to me,” Twilight gave her thanks before taking a deep swallow. “Just... please, don't mention it around Evan. I... I haven't told him yet,” she told them and they all gave the Pinkie Swear, putting her in further ease. Lassie was the most overjoyed of the group, believing she'd have a new friend to do her bidding.

After the brief fanfare, the group all settled back into their seats, going back to their conversations from before. Applejack however, sat Rarity aside to give her a talking to.

“Hear that Rarity?” she asked and the mare gave her friend a confused look.

“Well of course I did darling, we all did,” she mentioned and Applejack nodded.

“That's right. He's gonna be a father. So stop tryin teh mess with his head,” she commented and Rarity went to reply but Applejack cut in. “Yah darn well know what ah mean too!” she hissed quietly, as to not draw the attention of the others. “Ah know what kinda looks yah been given him! The kind that makes stallions not think with their heads!” she snapped at her friend. “Now, yer one a muh bestest friends, but so is Twilight. And we both know what yer tryin tah do is wrong,” Applejack scorned her friend but Rarity just tossed her mane to one side.

“Oh pish-posh Applejack, I see the looks you give him to. You're no different,” Rarity replied in a calm demeanor.

Applejack nearly gasped. “Ah don't give him those kinds a looks. Ah'm just amazed by how hard he's workin'. Almost figurin ah should give him a hard earned raise. He's more than deserves it,” she stated and Rarity nodded.

“Oh yes, a 'hard' earned 'raise' indeed,” she giggled but Applejack would have none of it. Just before she could snap though, a voice cut in.

“OoooOOooh, are we talking smut? Me too, me too!” chimed a bubbly voice. The two mares looked down to see Lassie laying on her belly, head supported by her two front paws. Rarity leaned over to whisper to Applejack.

“You ever find it strange that the dog can talk?” she asked and Lassie grumbled to herself.

“The dog can hear you, yah know,” she replied irritably...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

Despite having been out for hours after my apparent heart attack, I still ended up falling back to sleep again. I woke up pretty soundly, only to find out that now there were more ponies coming to see me, most of whom only stayed around for a short while before departing. Trixie stopped by, along with Derpy and Cheerilee and even Discord, the last of whom was the only one to stay, due to Fluttershy's presence here. All of them came by to make sure I was doing alright. It was nice, knowing I had friends who cared.

Redheart came around shortly after I awoke, along with a bunch of report papers. “I knew it... I just...” she muttered to herself and we all looked to her. She set the papers down and looked to me. “After that barn fire, the one at the Apple Farm... when your body was healed so rapidly I... I just didn't know what to think. To tell you the truth, I believed you had snuck into the resource room and taken a healing potion...” she replied and I chuckled, remembering that day.

“Yeah... I always tried to avoid you after that. I figured you were pretty mad so I just kinda stuck to the shadows...” I smirked. “Sorry,” I apologized but she waved a hoof.

“There's nothing to be sorry for. It was only after we did an inventory check that I wondered how else you could have possibly healed that rapidly... then it dawned upon me,” she said and we all sat in silence, like it was some big reveal plot twist near the end of a movie.

“Well... what happened?” I asked. She took a deep breath before speaking.

“You're succumbing to the side effects of accelerated regenesis,” she informed me and Discord let out a deflating sigh.

“Oh dear,” he whispered, some of us looking to him. Twilight was the first to speak up.

“What... why, what is that? Why 'oh dear'? Is it bad? It's bad isn't it?” she asked in a panic and Discord gave a 'so-so' motion with his paw.

“Well... I figured you of all ponies would know about this Twilight, being Celestia's student and all... but I suppose that was a secret best kept hidden,” he mentioned. Twilight nearly burst out in frieght.

“So what is it?! What is it doing to him?!” she panicked. She looked back to Redheart. “How come you knew about this and I didn't?! Why didn't you come tell us earlier?!” she asked, starting to break down, despite having no idea what was going on.

Discord placed a calming paw on her shoulder. “It's not... terribly bad... more of a... mixed blessing if you will,” he informed her and Redheart spoke up.

“I was going to come to ask for a blood sample so I could do tests, but I'd either get swamped with work or have my own personal agenda to attend to so I'd usually forget... and truth be told, I haven't seen him for some time and whenever I did he was usually running away and looking on the sprite of things so I started to believe perhaps he did take a healing potion without our knowledge.” Redheart sighed. “I wouldn't say I know about it, I've only read a few things. Mostly old passages of medical books from millenniums ago about old medical techniques...” she trailed off and grabbed a few scraps of paper, handing them to Twilight so she could read them.

Discord spoke up. “Yes... indeed. You see, back ages ago, unicorn soldiers would enchant themselves with a rapid regenesis spell. It could make the most fatal of wounds heal in a matter of seconds... it gave them an edge in battle,” he informed her and Twilight dropped the papers.

“He's going to die?!” she whimpered but Discord and Redheart both were quick to assure her otherwise.

“Nononono, far from it! Well... maybe not far from it,” Discord said, the last bit not exactly the best for comfort. Redheart spoke up to better put us all at ease.

“The enchantment causes a massive spike in metabolism rate. Where a normal pony's regenerative trait allows damaged skin and broken bones to be repaired at a nominal rate, wounds to an enchanted pony can heal at a bizarre speed. So fast that it's clearly visible to the naked eye... as we saw earlier with the scalpel.” She rolled the papers back up and stuffed them away.

Discord spoke up with the bad news. “Unfortunately... due to the... spiked metabolism rate, a pony enchanted with that spell underwent severe side effects. Most notably extremely rapid aging. It's also very stressful to one's heart...” he trailed off and Twilight spoke up.

“So it is killing him. He just keeps getting older!” she wept but Discord quickly cut in.

“No, no not quite. The enchantment doesn't cause a constant effect. It only occurs when the enchantment is stimulated to do so, say when you receive a wound. It is also factored by the severity of case as well. Something that would regularly be fatal taxes your body harder than say a paper cut. Otherwise it mostly lies dormant inside the pony. It also allowed the body to reduce lactic acids significantly, so the user generally never feels fatigued. They can run a mile. Their muscles build mass quicker, their blood becomes more adept at retaining fresh oxygen... essentially creating a super soldier...” he said before going silent.

There was a pause before Twilight spoke up. “So... so what does this all mean?” she asked and Discord once again spoke up.

“What it means, is if he lives a more laid back lifestyle, his body will continue to age at a normal pace. Due to his lifestyle... and numerous escapades, his body has been severely stressed by the enchantment, which may also be one of the only reasons he is still alive. Like I said... a mixed blessing,” he informed my mother whom was awestruck by all this sudden information.

This time it was Lassie whom spoke up. “So how come you two know about it, but not Twilight who's like... the smartest know-it-all of all time, didn't?” she asked with a smirk remark. Discord was the first to speak.

“Well... as you all recall, I was originally from a different era... an era in which this enchantment spell was still written into the history and science books, along with some spell books. Over the years it was phased out... I suppose the drawbacks outweighed the pros... it was more of a combat enchantment anyway. I suppose Celestia doesn't want us remembering Equestria's... darker times.”

Redheart spoke afterwards. “Like I said, I didn't think much about it until afterwards. I only vaguely remembered reading brief passages about when I was doing medical research.”

I spoke what was undoubtedly on most of our minds. “So... how much time do I have left?” I asked and Redheart shrugged.

“If you lived a casual lifestyle, probably another... say two decades,” she replied.

“Is that including working labor at the Apple Farm?” I asked and Applejack was quick to cut in.

“Yah know yah don't have tah. In fact, ah won't let yah!” she mentioned and I sighed depressingly. I could handle the laid back lifestyle, but I'm not sure what I'd do if I wasn't able to do some form of work.

“Actually...” Redheart cut in. “As long as he isn't putting his body through extreme stresses, he should be able to work for you. I hear it's not easy work, but I can't imagine it would cause further acceleration to his body's aging process,” she informed us.

“And if not?” I asked and everything went silent. Redheart didn't rightly know the answer to that, I could tell due to her facial expression. Discord was the one to answer, and his answer wasn't all that comforting.

“Well... judging by how rapidly the aging has progressed this far... and the recent heart attack... well, it's hard to say but...” I could tell he didn't want to further upset Twilight. I'd have to buy him a drink for that later.

“A year at best...” I said, raising my hand so I could look at the wrinkled backside. Discord nodded.

“Yeah...” he said, rather quietly. Twilight quickly opted for a solution.

“Well, Discord, since you know so much about it, and being the Lord of Chaos, can't you reverse the enchantment?” she suggested but he shook his head.

“No... the spell that enchanted the pony was permanent, made so thorough that nothing could reverse it. I'm sorry but-” I cut him short.

“It won't make a difference... I'm aged now. Reversing the spell wouldn't turn me young again. And it's not like taking it away is going to make me live any longer...” I said, much to the dismay of Twilight. I took her hoof in my hand and smiled. “The only thing this changes... is that we're going to be spending a bit more time on the balcony sipping juice and relaxing in the meadows on sunny days,” I said, Twilight's face brightening up.

“R-really? You mean...” she trailed off, not really needing me to word everything out.

“Yeah, that's right,” I said back and we embraced in a brief and passionate kiss. Applejack herded the others out of the room.

“Come on, we should give them some room,” she said, closing the door behind them as they all left. I remembered the vision I had with Death. How I could die in the year 2015. What Discord said about my life expectancy if I continued my lifestyle... well, I wasn't going to let it come to that. My life path would be my own. My future... was going to be different...

* * *

Elsewhere,

Third person...

The stallion unbuckled his war harness, dropping his sniper rifle to the ground. He was sweating a little, mostly out of nervousness, but also due to the physical training he had underwent. He looked back over his shoulder to where three of his other comrades continued to train. Two were hulking masses of muscle whom operated the heavy ordinance, while the third was a slim, slender looking figure who was dressed in a full body black suit that had been custom crafted by the user for optimal performance.

“Friggin ninja...” he muttered to himself as he looked to the black suited figure who hopped around the other two with ease, almost as though she was dancing around them. Turning his attention back to his task at hand he trotted aboard the cargo ship that had sat dormant for most of his time as a soldier for Kianna.

Walking up to the cockpit door, he knocked, getting a quick and sharp reply. “I'm busy,” the female voice inside snapped. Instead of obeying, the stallion stepped inside. Kianna looked over her shoulder as she sat in the pilot seat. “You don't fucking listen do you?” she snapped, making the stallion flinch.

The stallion closed the door behind himself, locking it as quietly as he could. Despite his discrete attempt the clicking lock still caught Kianna's ears. He hand rested on the grip of her Smith and Wesson revolver as she rose a brow.

The stallion spoke up. “So... uhm... anything uhh...” he tried to make conversation but was too nervous and shaky to do so. He scorned himself inwardly, having practiced for days what he was going to tell her.

“We got a new contract,” she said picking up some papers from a stack beside her. The stallion looked to the stack. Most were completed military contracts from places like Zebrafrica, Griffonstone and The Badlands down south.

“Uhm... any good?” he asked timidly and the woman shrugged as she tossed the papers aside.

“Dunno yet. I only looked it over. Security detail for a queen or something.” She looked up over her shoulder. “So do you need something or are you just in here to waste my time?” she asked aggressively and he gulped.

“I uhh... well, that is to say... I kinda want-wanted to... uhm... how have you been?” he asked stammeringly and the woman groaned.

“Get the fuck outta here. I have work to do,” she ordered him but he stood his ground. With a deep inhale he blundered out what he had to say.

“ILOVEYOU!” he gasped and the woman froze for a moment, trying to understand what he just said, since it was just a bluster of words. Leaning out the side of her seat she looked to him with a risen brow.

“You what?” she asked and he bit his lip so hard he nearly drew blood.

“Well... heh-heh... I guess what I meant to say was... uhm... uhh, what was the question?” he asked nervously, wishing at this point he could just shrivel up into a microscopic creature so that she couldn't stare at him with that petrifying glare.

She stood up with a terrifying glare and he gulped, his knees beginning to buckle and threatening to give out. “What-did-you-just-say?” she asked in a tone that made it sound as though if he answered wrong, she was going to end his life.

“WellIjustwantedtosaythatIthink-” she smacked him hard. He gasped and she continued to glare at him.

“Say it so I can understand what you're saying,” she ordered and he nodded feverishly.

“I-I-I... y-y-y-you're the most beautiful... uhm, wonderful... I love you so much I want to spend the rest of my days with you...” he cringed and she cocked back her fist and slammed it forwards, though it hit the wall just beside his head.

“Grrr... what was that?!” she asked violently and he cringed but she grabbed him, heaving his body up to his hindlegs so they were eye level with each other. “Wanna run that by me again?!” she yelled in his face. Though unknowing to him, her left hand began to stroke up and down his side.

“I just... I love you. I've loved you since the day I met you. That rainy night when I saw you blow away that pony for no reason... I just... I wanted to be with you for the rest of my days. I think... I think you're beautiful-” she punched again, though slightly further from his head.

“What else?!” she boomed, her left hand stroking down the outside of his hindleg.

“You're the best commander I've ever known, better than even Shinning Armor!” he stammered out. Her hand didn't punch but rather she just placed it beside his head.

“Anything else you'd like to add to that?” she asked.

“You care for your squad. You raise us like your own. Love us like family... give us weapons and gear. Teach us techniques... like a true military commander,” he said. She rested her right hand down onto his shoulder, left hand trailing up his leg without his knowledge as he was still petrified beyond belief.

“Go on,” she said in a calm demeanor.

“Every time I'm around you, my heart flutters... I just can't... I love you. You drive me crazy,” he whispered.

“Mmm... I can tell,” she said, stroking her left hand up his rock hard length which before that time he never knew was erect.

“UGHNGHH!” he gasped and she smiled.

“So... do you really love me?” she asked and he nodded feverishly. “You better, cause you just stole my heart... and if you break it, I'll rip yours right outta your chest,” she threatened.

“Then I have nothing to worry about,” he replied back, leaning in for a gentle kiss but she stopped him.

“Ah-ah-ahh. We're gonna do things my way,” she told him and he nodded.

“I wouldn't have it any other way,” he said back but before he could do much else, his head was knocked back into the cockpit wall as she thrust her mouth upon his in a fiery kiss. The fire burning inside of the duo was nearly enough to consume them both.

Kianna moaned into the stallion's mouth, as he did the same to her. His hooves began to trail down her body, slowly reaching the bottom of her overly tight, overly revealing, tank top and pulling it up over her head in one single motion.

Her large breasts were still concealed behind a bra but that quickly came off as well. The most wonderful set of breasts the stallion had ever gazed his eyes upon bounced in front of him. Kianna thrust back against him, quickly unbuckling his combat gear and throwing it to the side. In less than a minute they were nude, slowly sliding down the wall of the cockpit and laying across the floor in a fiery heap of lust.

Turing her body around, she positioned herself in a 69 position with him and finally got a good look at his package, as he did with her. 'Sweet deal' they both thought.

The stallion looked in awe at the tight little pussy presented before him. It was so different than any mare's he had seen before.

Meanwhile Kianna was quick to work on the largest cock she had ever sucked on. The texture was unlike that of a human's and the head was shaped differently as well, but the most notable thing was the medial ring. She shivered at the though of it sliding in and out of her tight little hole.

Quickly noticing that her lover was stuck in awe, she shoved her ass into his face. He quickly got the message and went to work, not bothering to tease her and simply went in for the kill. His tongue drove deep into her cunt, making Kianna squeal wildly. His tongue was thicker than she had imagined. His tongue texture was also slightly different that a human's. It was a bit coarser, enough so that it created a pleasurable friction against her inner walls as he ate her out. His tongue constantly rubbed back and forth against her most sensitive spot.

She couldn't help herself but continue screaming wildly as his tongue explored every part of her depths. 'If fucking him is anywhere close to this, I won't be able to stop cumming,' Kianna thought to herself.

Her hips began to rock back and forth against his face as she quickly went about sucking him off. His cock was a little longer than her mouth alone could deal with, so rather she began bobbing her head up and down the top of his shaft, while stroking beneath his medial ring with her hand.

The stallion moaned into her love hole, driving Kianna into an orgasm. Her love juices leaked out and into his mouth, some seeping past his lips and staining the fur on his muzzle. Kianna moaned wildly, her tongue doing circles around his cock that was buried deep into her throat.

With a satisfied moan she pulled her mouth off his cock, giving the tip a gentle little kiss that made precum spurt out in a generous amount. The stallion beneath her began to twitch and fidget, obviously on the verge of an orgasm. “Hmm, well-well-well, what have we here?” she asked, turning her body around so that she was lined up with his length. She pressed her lips to his, tasting her juices as he tasted his own cock.

Lowering herself, she felt the heated sensation of his thick tip start to spread apart her pussy lips. She whipped her head back, a thick strand of saliva and pussy juice mix connecting their lips.

Letting gravity do the work, she let her body imaple itself upon the stallion's generous length. She let out a howling moan as yet another powerful orgasm washed over her. The stallion went to thrust and she could feel his length thickening, ready to cum. But she wanted more than just penetration. She wanted a wild, messy, cum filled fucking.

With great force she held his body still, yet even so her inner muscles began massaging his length to great effect. A tingly sensation began to plague his entire length and his head flared out. The increased girth of his rod further ramped up the mind boggling orgasm Kianna was enduring.

With a powerful throb, a nearly boiling hot jet of cum burst from the stallion's cock, filling her womb to the brim and within a second it began seeping out her already stuffed cunt. A second equally powerful throb further filled her, almost enough to start stretching her.

She pulled herself off his length with an audible plop. Cum poured out of her stretched cunt like a waterfall, dripping down into his lap as he jetted out another blast of his essence, this one plastering itself across her breasts. A fourth and fifth blast smeared cum across her face and belly respectively.

As her stretched cunt drained out, Kianna took no time in impaling herself again, sustaining yet another mind numbing orgasm that made stars flash across her vision from just the penetration alone.

She felt his cock bottoming out inside of her, the medial ring rubbing against her clit and further stimulating the tidal pleasure of her orgasm. She began to wonder if she'd even be able to dominate her squad mate like she originally planned.

With whatever willpower she had left, she began to rock her hips against his, barely able to lift herself a few inches to ride him cowgirl style. The stallion's hooves reached her side, guiding her motions while thrusting his hips into hers.

The size of his cock, along with his medial ring constantly rubbing against her fun button and G-spot kept her in a world of bliss.

Her tongue lolled out of her mouth, drooling just ever so slightly as her eyes rolled into the back of her head. Within minutes she was lost into a world beyond anything she had ever experienced, the only thing she felt was the sensational feeling of having herself absolutely stuffed with his gargantuan dick.

The stallion himself grunted and huffed, her tight little cooch having been the tightest hole he'd ever fucked. Generally he prized himself for having a lasting endurance in the proverbial bedroom but she had already made him cum once in record time and he was bridging onto a second cumming already despite having just came only minutes before.

Biting his lip, he let out a snort as his cock began to swell and thicken once more. The head of his shaft flared out as he continued thrusting into the woman, his swollen member causing a bulge in her belly and he could literally see how deeply he was penetrating her, driving him even wilder. The woman felt his flared head spread her insides even wider as he continued thrusting into her.

The tingly sensation from before returned yet again but with a more mind fazing sensation that left him completely helpless to do anything but hilt himself inside of her. He drove himself in hard, but bottomed out against her cervix. He jutted slightly then thrusted again, his cock head stretching apart her cervix and fitting the flared head of his cock into her womb.

Kianna gasped in a split of pain and pleasure as just a split second later she felt herself get filled for a second time but unlike before his erection wasn't removed as he began to fill her.

Luckily his second cumming was no where near as potent as the first, but even so she found that he began to slightly stretch and bulge her stomach as he overfilled her womb. Finally spent, he withdrew himself, the duo gasping in one final pleasure of sex before both collapsing, Kianna falling off the stallion as the latter simply went limp.

After several minutes, Kianna huffed, satisfied with her lover's performance. “We'll have... to do... that again... sometime...” she panted but didn't get a reply and noticed he was passed out cold. Snuggling up tight to him she quickly joined in the well deserved nap.

Outside the other squad members continued their hoof to hoof combat, being trained by the ninja clad figure. One of the stallions threw a powerful strike but his opponent swiftly evaded it before grabbing his arm then pivoting on her heels in a complete circle. Her motion twisted his arm and caused his much larger mass to flip and slam into the ground.

“Ugh... why do I let you talk us into this?” he grumbled. The ninja stepped back and readied herself as she felt the presence of the other charging her from behind. Ducking her head, she dodged the second attacker's blow, grabbing his assaulting foreleg and pulling it over her shoulder.

Shifting her body and twirling, she offset the second stallion's weight and threw off his balance before hurling his body over her own and sending it airborne for a brief moment. He slammed into the second and both wheezed in pain.

“Ugh... this is ridiculous,” grumbled the second and the faint giggling of the ninja caught their ears.

“You guys had enough?” she teased and the first stallion scoffed.

“We had enough before we even started. How do you even talk us into this?” he asked and she again giggled before pulling back the mask on her suit, revealing her stripped fur pattern.

She was black and white, like all zebras. Unlike most however, he eyes were pure white, which were quickly covered by a pair of circular, pure black glasses. “Because you guys love me,” she said with a gleeful smile before looking to the cargo plane. “How long you figure he's been in there?” she asked and the second answered through a grunt.

“About twenty minutes,” he replied, the zebra ninja just laughing as she grabbed her walking stick.

“He's dead,” she said as she began walking away, letting the stick lead her way. The first stallion groaned as he fell back, only then realizing his squad mate had landed on him in a most particular pose, leaving them in a 69.

“Why does she always do that?!...”

* * *

Evan's perspective...

The warm summer air felt nice. I was nicely relaxed on the balcony, resting in a reclining lawn chair and sipping juice. August is a nice month. It not too hot but still warm enough to fully relax and bathe in the sun's warmth.

Twilight lay beside me, equally relaxed and savoring the sun's warmth. Lassie lay by my side, the sound of her schlucking tongue making itself known every so often. It had been a few days since my heart attack, and not to mention my vow to Twilight to 'retire' in a matter of speaking.

There was a knock at the door. “Your turn...” I said to Twilight who just hummed to herself.

“Mmm... nope, I got the last one.”

Lassie spoke up. “Don't even think about asking me man, I don't have thumbs,” she snickered and I just sighed as a second knocking at the door occured.

“I'll be down in a minute...” I sighed, not wanting to leave my recliner chair... oh how the times have changed and the great have fallen.

“You sure... cause I vaguely remember answering the last time,” I chuckled and Twilight just shook her head.

“Nope,” she giggled, looking over to me with a wink. I just laughed playfully as I stood up and stretched.

“Alright, I'll answer the door,” I chuckled. Walking down the stairs, yet another set of knocks answered. “Ah'm comin', ah'm comin... don't worry,” I said, in no particular hurry. Currently, I wasn't wearing any footwear whatsoever and had a mere tank top and shorts on.

The knocking echoed again as I neared the door. “Almost there, don't panic,” I said cheerfully. With a bright smile I opened the door to greet whomever it was, only to gasp as I found myself on the business end of an M16A2 with an M203 grenade launcher...

Author's Note

Bu-dum-tssh. Anyway, there you have it. The reason behind Evan's healing factor.
Cheers :raritywink:

Chapter 56

'Chrysalis?...'

The barrel was nearly point blank in my face. My mouth gaped slightly and a voice spoke, taking my attention to the operator of the firearm. “Jesus... you look old!” said a female voice. I looked to the woman wielding the firearm. She was...

'Uhm... where have I...' I trailed off but it quickly clicked. That lady from the jungle, the one who had ambushed me when I found that AKM.

The hairs on the back of my neck prickled and my body seemed to move without command. My right and left hand grabbed at the gun, my right landing near the end of the muzzle while my left grabbed the underside of the grenade launcher, both hands pushing upwards while I dropped my center mass a few inches lower, the barrel now pointing a few inches above my head.

Simultaneously, my left hand slapped down hard on the stock of the rifle while my right hand thrusted the barrel back towards the woman, the front sight of the M16 rifle hitting her hard in the forehead. She staggered back while I myself took a more defensive posture with her rifle.

Everything happened so fast I could barely believe my eyes when I saw that the rifle was now in my possession, barrel pointed at its former owner. With a brief motion I tilted my upper frame while driving the heel of my foot into her chest, knocking her onto her back.

The rifle stock butted up against my shoulder once more as I kept my aim trained on her. My senses flared up into full alert just as a voice spoke from beside me. “Don't even think about it!” he shouted. From the corner of my vision I could see the end of an M14 muzzle. “Drop the weapon!” he ordered. My hands gripped tightly on the M16 just before I felt him jam the barrel of the gun against the side of my head. “DROP THE WEAPON!” he boomed.

I let out a quiet groan as I tossed the gun forwards. “Good, now step back.” I did as he ordered and saw him look to the woman on the ground, though just briefly. “Commander, I got you covered.” He turned back to me but was somewhat silent. “Uhh... uhm...” he stammered.

I let out a rather irritated exhale as I examined his stature. He was sweating just a bit, damp fur and beads of sweat around his face. His one leg vibrated just ever so slightly. His pupils were shrunken and were quickly going over me. He was nervous.

“Ugh, rookie... you left your safety on,” I commented. He blinked but didn't deter.

“Yeah right! I'm an elite mercenary! I don't make rookie mistakes!” He tried to growl at me but I had a feeling ponies weren't meant to growl. I just rolled my eye in an unimpressed way. He blinked in rapid succession before bluntly looking to the safety on his M14.

In a flash I was moving. My left hand gripped the barrel of his rifle while my right gripped hard on the receiver and pushed, knocking the rifle's aim away from me. In a heartbeat my right arm cocked and drove an elbow strike into his face, knocking his head back. Moving my right hand down to the stock, I used his own rifle to twirl him through the air and slam him to the ground right next to the woman. I quickly stepped back, now in the possession of an M14.

I kept my aim on the two of them but quickly stopped dead in my tracks as I noticed a laser dot on my chest. Looking up, I spotted two hulking stallions, one with a twin set of M60s, the other with two M202 Flash rocket launchers. Both had their weapons strapped to their sides in a ridiculous harness system.

'What the hell is this?' I asked myself. “Drop the weapon,” spoke a soft voice. I turned to notice their was a black cloaked pony beside me, whom had somehow managed to get there without my knowledge.

Deciding to listen, I tossed that rifle forwards as well. The woman and the stallion stood up in a hurry. The woman hissed at the stallion, berating him for his insubordination. “The safety?! Really?” she scorned, the stallion flinching.

Before any of us knew what to think, there was a barking, followed by a vicious growling. We all looked, finding that the growling was coming from Lassie, whom had also entered the scene without my knowledge. Her lips were curled back and gave her a very savage appearance.

Just as I realized whom it was, the group of ponies, the woman and myself were all caught in a purple aura and lifted into the air, the others being shaken wildly. “ENOUGH!” my mother screamed.

I looked at Lassie whom walked over to Twilight and gave her props. I yelled out in confusion. “Okay... what the hay is going on here? Seriously, I'm confused.”

My mother set me down and stepped up, looking to the ragtag mercenary group... or whatever they were. “I'd like to know quite the same thing,” she mentioned and the woman sighed.

“Relax. We're old chums,” she mentioned in a friendly voice and I furrowed my brow.

“No we're not...” I trailed off and she gasped, as though insulted.

“What?! Oh come on Derreck, so we had a disagreement, big deal. No need to be sour about it,” she said and I squinted my good eye.

“I'm not Derreck,” I said back and she took a moment to think.

“Holy shit... you're that special forces guy that NATO sent after me... Christ you've gotten old,” she commented but I just sighed.

“I'm not special forces,” I told her, remembering that, for whatever reason, she thought I was a Green Beret or something ridiculous like that. Twilight spoke up.

“So you all know each other than?” she asked but I shook my head, then nodded, then shook my head again.

“She,” I said, motioning to the woman, “tried to kill me once... but I've never seen the ponies before,” I said, getting a scoff from the black clad pony.

“Hey, I'm a zebra just so you know,” she, judging by her voice, mentioned. Twilight stepped closer but kept them in limbo.

“So why are they here then?” Twilight asked and I shrugged but before I could say a word, the woman spoke.

“Just here to see an old friend,” she mentioned but I snapped a reply back.

“With loaded guns... mhmm?” I commented and she just rolled her eyes.

“You're the one hunting me... so seeing how things are, why don't you just fess up already. You sound... Canadian... eh,” she laughed then gave me a squinty eyed look. “Joint Task Force 2,” she commented and I just groaned.

“Okay, I'm hardly even military material here. What in Celestia's name makes you think I'm a military combatant? A special forces one at that?” I asked and she chuckled.

“Oh... I dunno. Maybe the camouflage, battle tactics and the fact you were able to disarm me not once, but twice, along with one of my squad members who had the drop on you from a blind spot... CANSOFCOM?” she asked and I gave a disgruntled groan.

“I'm a civilian,” I replied back and she gave me another once over.

“CSOR?” she continued to pry and I just sighed as I stepped next to my mother and sat Lassie down beside me. I had a pair of shorts on along with a tropical leaf shirt one might see in Mareami.

“Do I look even remotely military to you?” I asked and one of her squad members, the one with the machine guns, spoke up.

“He's got a point boss... I don't think I'd want this guy covering my six during an op,” he added but the woman just scoffed.

“You haven't seen the way he moves. He's.. he's just gotta be. I can't directly describe what makes this guy special forces, but I know NATO sent him after me,” she replied and I rose a brow.

“Why exactly would NATO send someone after you?” I asked and she shot me a quizzical look, like I should already know the answer.

“Because I'm Kianna Magnum... you know, infamous mercenary from the Middle East? Illicit firearms dealer and gun runner... come on, don't play stupid, they would have briefed you on this,” she snapped but I just shrugged before placing one hand on Lassie's head and giving it a rub while wrapping my other arm around Twilight.

“Well... actually, I'm just a... regular everyday person. Okay maybe I own a gun, wear camouflage and know my way around a heated argument but...” I trailed off and it seemed to settle in on her just a little.

“God that's a disappointment...”

Twilight spoke up, bringing to thought something I hadn't quite thought about. “So what exactly are you here for? To make a serious problem?” she interrogated but the woman, Kianna, just laughed.

“Hardly. We were looking for a friend to help run security at a wedding...” she trailed off and gave me a look. “Don't suppose you'd know where Derreck is?” she asked but I shrugged, shaking my head. Lassie spoke up, and through the corner of my eye I saw her pointing my way.

“Here's right here,” she laughed and I turned to look past myself, Derreck nowhere to be seen. We all looked around but Lassie just chuckled before heading towards the house. “You guys are all screwy. I'm getting a drink. If anyone wants me I'll be in the basement doing you-know-what.” With that she was gone, leaving the rest of us in total loss.

The woman spoke up. “Uhm... the dog can... can talk?” she asked and I just shrugged. “God... what next?” she asked and I rolled my eye.

“Okay... so what gives?” I asked and she just repeated the same as before.

“We got hired by some pampered royal asses to run security at a wedding. I know this... guy, Derreck-” I cut her short.

“How do you know Derreck?!” I inquired sternly and she just laughed.

“Oooh... tough guy huh? We've met on several occasions. He knows his way around a gun so I figured he might be perfect for the operation...” she again trailed off, looking to me with thought. “Say... you seem to know a fair bit. Wanna make a quick bit?” she asked but I merely scoffed at her offer before she had even explained.

“Not a chance!” I snarled. She sighed but then smirked.

“What's wrong, old man, feeling a little on the feeble side?” she tried to poke at my pride but I didn't budge, instead Twilight spoke up.

“What kind of job?” she asked. I gave her a look but she just perked a brow. “I want to know what she's up to. She's obviously a trouble maker,” Twilight inferred.

Kianna just laughed. “If you'd uhh... let me, I could grab the contract papers and show you. It's a royal wedding, totally legit... say, if you're the princess, shouldn't you have gotten an invite already?” she asked. I grabbed the woman's M16 and held it at the ready.

“Drop em, and let's see what this is all about,” I suggested, my mother doing so. Kianna reached for her pockets but I stiffened my grip on the rifle, drawing the sights on her. “Slowly,” I ordered and she just laughed.

“Definitely SOF...” she didn't say much else and grabbed a scroll, tossing it over to us. Using her magic, my mother quietly read the contract to herself before gasping.

“I... no way! That's... how... I can't...” she seemed... at a loss of words. Holding the rifle with one hand, I grabbed the papers and looked. Most of it was date, time, payment but one of the papers caught me way off guard.

“For the royal wedding of Prince Blueblood and...” I trailed off in complete and utter disbelief. “Chrysalis?...” I stammered, quickly recalling the queen... the first one I met when I entered this world...

The papers fell from my hands as I went wide eyed. I wasn't quite sure why I was so shocked... Twilight spoke up and cracked my thoughts. “Why wasn't I informed earlier?” she asked and Kianna just shrugged.

“How should I know? So whatta yah say cowboy?” she asked. I still wasn't sure about this. Could it be a trick? Why wasn't Twilight informed? How did whoever contracted Kianna even know about her presence and how to contact her?

“SPIKE!” Twilight again interrupted my thoughts. The little... not so little anymore, dragon came rushing out. “Write a note to Celestia at once!” she ordered. The dragon himmed and hawed as he searched for an ink quill in his nonexistent pockets. I reached into the chest pocket of my casual shirt and pulled out a pen ad parchment.

“Here buddy,” I offered, the dragon quickly giving his thanks as he went to write down the letter.

“Dear Princess Celestia. I request an urgent response due to strange circumstances that are beyond my capabilities. Is there truly a wedding to be held for your Nephew Blueblood and Queen of the changelings, Chrysalis?” Twilight asked, Spike quickly writing down her note word for word.

“Do you... really have to address her like that? I mean... she can't really be THAT bad,” I said and Twilight shot me a look.

“She tried to ruin my brother's wedding!” she snapped back. Spike spat a gentle fume of flame that disintegrated the parchment into dust that blew away into the wind.

“Well... that was-” Spike cut me off with a burp, a scroll coming up out of his throat. “Woah... wild...” I trailed off then vaguely remembered that Spike somehow had a talent to send stuff to Celestia meanwhile she could somehow send stuff back through him...

Twilight grabbed the scroll and read it outloud. “My dear friend Twilight Sparkle. Yes, it is very true that my great, great, great, great, great, great... something rather, nephew is to be wedded to Chrysalis. I would've suspected that yourself and your friends would have received an invitation by now...” Twilight trailed off then looked up. Spike burped again, a large envelope coming out with a small letter attached.

“Dear Twilight Sparkle, enclosed is eight wedding invitations. One for yourself, Spike, your closest friends and your dearest student,” Twilight spoke up. She scratched her head in thought. “But... wait, how could this... it has to be some kind of joke...” she stammered. Kianna spoke up, our attention having been dragged away from her.

“So... in that case, whatta yah say old man?” she commented, her hand extended. I suppose if I was invited to Chrysalis's wedding I shouldn't really refuse. I shook her hand but she just laughed. “I kinda meant give me my gun back...”

* * *

I checked my custom watch as the train chugged along. Twilight had rounded up her friends and we had all caught a ride on the train, much to our dismay as the apparent 'mercenaries' tagged along. Lassie had come along to, though we hadn't received enough invitations I could always just plus one her.

I looked to Kianna and her mercenaries. I didn't trust them, and I wasn't quite sure how Derreck and this lady knew each other. I had agreed to run security with her team, though I was highly skeptical about this. 'Why didn't Celestia just have the royal guard run security?' I thought to myself.

Twilight and the others sat in a different train car than myself and these ragtag mercenaries. From what I could gather, two were heavy ordinance. One had twin machine guns while the other had rocket launchers. The black clad pony, or zebra as she called herself, seemed to be... a ninja of some sort. There was a stallion whom operated an M14 and finally...

There was Kianna. The one who had nearly killed me on my trip to Manehatten. She, from what I understood, was the team leader. And now I suppose there was me, the FNG. Didn't matter how they put it. I didn't trust them and by my account they should be thrown in jail the moment we stepped foot in Canterlot.

I was currently wearing my old M81 camouflage jacket and pant., Belladonna was strapped to my right leg in her holster. I had the Eagle Eye set up on my head but didn't have it activated at the moment.

Kianna smirked as she looked to me. “What happened to your eye?” she asked. I didn't answer at first but then figured there was no harm in answering.

“Damaged in a fight...” I trailed off, taking a look out the window as we came upon the massive capital city that was Canterlot. “So... which side of the law are you on anyways?” I asked and she just sighed with a smile.

“Well, neither technically. I play all sides. The law is almost identical to war. Play both sides and neither force truly wants you dead. It's how I keep my head from getting blown off. Supply both sides of a conflict, neither wants to kill you as it will result in an arms shortage. Supply just one side, the other will hunt you down. The same applies with the law. Throw the police some of their most wanted criminals, they turn a blind eye... but in Equestria... well, the laws are a little more strict so I have to play ball a little more than I'd like to... get what I'm saying?” she asked.

My brow furrowed. Oh, I got what she was saying...

“So how bout you. How do you know so much about fighting and guns, camouflage... yet claim to be just a family man?” She asked and I replied rather plainly.

“Tough upbringing.” My hand rested on the hilt of my hand cannon.

“That's a nice pistol. You know GROM uses them? Those guys are tough cookies... though their pistols aren't as fancy as yours. More of a paperweight but seeing you wield one, I almost wish I had one of my own. After you pulled apart my Beretta I decided to go with your advice and get something a little more... sturdy...” she said, pulling out a Smith and Wesson 629 Performance Center revolver.

It was shined up pretty nice, I'd give her that. She began to spin it on her index finger, stopping for a fraction of a second before spinning it in the reverse direction. Giving it a toss she caught it in her left hand and began spinning it again. She quickly tilted her hand horizontally but still managed to keep spinning it. She cocked her hand behind her back and tossed the gun up over her shoulder, catching the firearm in her right hand before continuing to spin it.

Finally stopping, she set the handgun down on the table that sat between us. “.44 Magnum. Not nearly as powerful as that fifty of yours, but it'll do the trick. Besides, mine isn't a paperweight,” she mentioned but I kept my expression blunt.

The train came to a stop and the conductor made his usual announcements as ponies began offloading from the train. I picked up my duffle bag, which was mostly filled with clean clothes, and headed out.

I quickly met up with the others, Lassie looking around with great fascination. “Man, this place is awesome. You totally have to bring me here more often...” She took a deep inhale, sniffing the air. “Ohhhhh-hoo, man. Smell that? Fresh pancakes in the afternoon... I could die a happy dog,” she chimed.

From the corner of my eye I spotted Chrysalis, conversing with the lead mercenary. “I'll be right back,” I said to the others as I dropped my duffle bag. I quickly hurried over to Chrysalis, whom I hadn't seen in... nearly a year.

“CHRYSIE!” I chimed happily as I went to hug her but instead she quickly backpedaled. “Uhh... oh, okay... uhm...” I trailed off then remembered she did have a tenacious fear of me when we first met. “Sorry I uhh... yeah. Heh... hey, it's great to see you again!” I said and she shot me an estranged look.

“Yes... uhm... indeed I...” she trailed off as she looked me over.

“It's me Burdy. Remember? I know it's been like a year but... Zecora, the dog, Cadance...” I trailed off but she looked at me as though I was a complete stranger. I began to hum then quickly started to sing.

“No one knows what it's like,

to be the bad man...

to be the sad man-”

Kianna quickly cut me off by telling me my singing sucked.

004, err... Blue, whom was standing next to Chrysalis, spoke up. “Ahh yes... I remember you. Mr. Burdick, the twit who can't remember a pony's name,” he stated and I smiled. Chrysalis spoke up, almost in a forced tone of embaressment.

“Oh yes! Of course, how could I ever forget you. How are you Burdick?” she asked. Her voice just sounded... off. And nopony really refers to me as just 'Burdick'.

“Uhm... yah can call me Burdy if yah like. Anywho... man, it's so good to see you again Chrysalis. How have you been?” I asked but her answer was short and to the point.

“Good. Very good...” she turned her attention back to Kianna. “As I was saying. I'd like you to set up your security forces as soon as possible...” Chrysalis, 004 and the mercenaries all departed whilst talking about security detail. I suppose I should've went with them but I instead chose to stay behind. I stood there, dumbfounded and feeling... forgotten.

Twilight stepped up behind me, now accompanied by her sister and brother. I was left at a loss of words and only mustered a few words. “She's... not the same...” I muttered but Twilight spoke up much to my dismay.

“She was never really a nice creature. She probably just acted nice around you before to get what she needed.” I stood for a moment in silence before speaking.

“Changeling... not a creature... she's not a... thing...” I tried to defend her but found it difficult, especially with the way she just blew me off. I felt a more masculine hoof rest on my shoulder.

I turned to see the face of her elder brother whom I hadn't really seen much before. “My name's Shinning Armor. I don't think we ever had a proper introduction before.” He offered me his hoof which I quickly shook.

Before I had much time to do anything there was a tugging at my leg. I looked down to see Lassie giving me puppy-dog eyes. “Funnel cakes pwwwwease?” she asked with one of the most adorable puppy dog faces I had ever seen. Shining and Cadance gasped as they sputtered the same phrase everypony says around Lassie.

“THE DOG TALKS?!” Lassie shot them a stare.

“Seriously? In a world of talking ponies and magic that's the most bizarre thing you've seen?”

* * *

We all took seats outside of an icecream shop that also just so happened to have funnel cakes, which Lassie ordered two of just for herself. I was going to pay but the owner insisted on giving us all a freebie... I think it was something to do with Twilight and Cadance being royal princesses...

I took a seat, licking away at my soft serve ice-cream cone that had been dipped in chocolate syrup. Many of Twilight's friends had just gotten plain-jane ice-cream in cones. As we sat, Twilight and her sister... or sister-in-law, began conversing about old times. Shining turned to me.

“So... that lady friend of yours... the mercenary who's been-” I cut him short.

“She's not my friend. We uhh... she tried to kill me once and now figures that times have changed and... she believes I was some sort of elite trained operative sent to take her down...” I responded and he rose a brow.

“The royal guard doesn't have any information on her. Can she be trusted?” he asked but I just shrugged.

“She tried to kill me once. I don't trust her, but...” I trailed off and looked to the others whom were all enjoying themselves merrily. I remembered what I was like when I arrived. “Who's to say she hasn't changed...”

“Well I don't trust her, or Chrysalis for that-” Shining began but Cadance groaned.

“Shiny, honey nopony really trusts her after what she did but... I mean Aunt Celestia has the guard working around the clock. Don't you think you could relax just a little bit and enjoy yourself. It's been forever since we've seen Twilight and all you've done so far is fret about Chrysalis,” Cadance pitched. I quickly came to my old friend's, if that's what one would consider her, defense.

“Well, I know she almost ruined your wedding... but she really isn't all that bad. She's actually quite nice when you get to know her...” I said, quickly realizing more than a few faces were turned my way. “Well... I wasn't the greatest either when I arrived. Can't you just give her a chance like you gave me a chance? I mean... Fluttershy, not to really bring it up, but I threatened your life when I thought you were a home intruder. Mom... I can't imagine it was easy the first few months considering how ignorant and stubborn I was... Chrysalis may have done some questionable things but... I mean can't we give her another chance?” I offered.

Cadance was about to speak up but a scream from the sky caught all our attention. All looking up, we quickly spotted a falling gray pegasus. “DERPY!” I called out, jumping over the small patio railing in an attempt to catch her.

“I GOT 'ER!” Dash called out, zooming into the sky and quickly catching her in a spectacular show of aerobatics. Dropping swiftly yet rather gently to the ground, Dash set down the ditzy gray mare.

“Wow! Thanks Dash! You're a hero!” Derpy appraised but the cyan mare just brushed it off as nothing.

“It's cool Derpy, just like me!” she said, striking a heroic pose as though to have her picture taken. “Ah-ha... hey, what are you doing all the way up here in Canterlot?” she asked and Derpy gave a confused look for just a moment before a light bulb appeared to come on in her mind.

“Oh that's right! You all got mail but weren't in Ponyville. The train conductor said you had come this way so I decided to bring it to you. Consider it like express mail,” she said, grabbing out a wad of envelopes for all of us.

Handing them over we all took a look, Dash quickly piping up. “These are like a week and a half old!” she stated but I held a hand to her mouth.

“It's fine. Thanks Derpy. That's really thoughtful of you,” I said with a smile, getting a smile back along with a nuzzle to my side from the gray pegasus.

“I'd stick around but I gotta fly. There's some of last month's mail for the Ponyville Spa,” she said, quickly taking off. I just stifled a laugh as I shook my head with a smile. Oh Derpy, you adorable, lovable pony you...

Twilight's voice broke my thoughts. “Oh... well... here's our invitations...” she trailed off. I turned around to see that indeed everypony of Twilight's main group of friends had gotten an invitation.

“I... no, there's something off about this...” she mentioned.

“Ooooh yeppy! A party!” Pinkie squealed excitably, bouncing around in a blaze of motion. Rarity added in afterwards.

“I get to design the royal wedding dress! Why I'm honored.” Something began to click inside my mind.

“Gals, don't you see what's wrong with this?” Twilight asked, everypony looking to her. “It's the exact same as last time!” she mentioned but Cadance spoke up.

“Well... actually... she offered me to be the best mare... apparently to make up for trying to ruin our wedding,” she mentioned but Twilight just groaned.

“Don't you think it's just a little suspicious though? I mean, she even blew Evan off just like what happened with me!” she commented but I just shrugged.

“Well... I mean I guess we weren't the super of best friends. We only did know each other for like... two days... hey, I wonder how her dog's doing...” I wondered aloud, thinking back on it.

“I just think it's all very strange and-” but before she could finish, her brother spoke up and commented on something very true.

“Yes, but Twilight, Chrysalis disgused herself as Cadance to trick everypony. How is she supposed to trick everypony by disguising herself as... herself? Besides, perhaps she was impressed with how the last wedding was set up and wanted it to be the same. I think it's suspicious but not in the way you do.” We all stood there, the conversation in a stalemate.

I spoke up to try and end this conversation. “Well, it doesn't matter anyway. Like Cadance said, Tia's got the guard running 24/7 and they even have a private security team now...” I trailed off at the thought of Kianna running security. I didn't like the thought of it, regardless of how little I knew about her.

Twilight pitched up yet again. “Yes, but Chrysalis hired them to run security. Technically they're on her side,” she mentioned but I again stepped in to Chrysalis's defense.

“Wait, hold on... since when did we decide there would be sides and that anything was going to happen?” I asked. We all stood in silence but Lassie finally ended the conversation.

“Mmm, oh this ice-cream is soooOOOOOoooo good!” she mentioned aloud. Dash turned and gasped like a vile crime had just been committed.

“HEY! That's MY ice-cream!” she nearly screamed but Lassie just shrugged.

“So. It was melting while you were all bickering about Queen Swiss-Cheese...”

* * *

Kianna sat me down along with most of her group in front of a projector screen in one of the old unused rooms in the castle. This was to be our briefing and mission control room. She went through tactics and assigned roles, along with positions for everyone.

She began going over rules of engagement and I chose to intervene. “Kianna-” she cut me short with a snappy response.

“It's commander!” Her voice was like a whip. I flinched but just ever so slightly.

I raised my hands in a defensive way as to show I was sorry. “Commander... this isn't Iraq, or Bosnia, or Rwanda... this is Equestria, a world of talking ponies. There isn't... insurgent threats, there isn't terrorist bombings, there isn't... we don't really need to go full out, Rambo First Blood here. These ponies are calm and-” she quickly snapped at me.

“We're security detachment 01. We're using state of the art weaponry to ensure nothing goes wrong during the Queen's royal wedding. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!” She shouted but I just shrugged.

“Ki... Commander, with all due respect... it's a bunch of ponies. We don't need...” I looked to one of the brutes. “M60 machine guns. We're not trying to intervene in a civil war here. All we need to do is make sure ponies behave themselves. Heck, just sidearms would do. No need for a show of force,” I stated and she shot me a glare.

“You're not team leader here, so SHUT THE FUCK UP!” she nearly howled and I just sighed then decided to role with it.

“Yes ma'am,” I finished. She began going over logistics and recon then finally ended our briefing.

“And, I suppose you should all get acquainted with this mouth-piece here. As some of you may know, he was the NATO agent tasked with tracking me down and eliminating me. Alas, he has seen the light of day and aborted his mission. DISMISSED!” She just had to finish by yelling.

We all started to leave to begin our assigned roles but Kianna put a hand on my shoulder to keep me behind. “So... just between you and me, you know... top-secret kinda stuff... who are you really with?” she asked and I sighed then decided on an answer that was kinda true.

“I'm the Princess's star pupil,” I informed her and she grunted.

“Seriously. What was your unit? Is it really gonna kill you to tell me?” she asked but I shook my head.

“I really wasn't with any SOF. I'm just... a person. Your every day Joe...” I trailed off and thought about it. “So what about you? I mean, you're pretty good and you figure NATO sent me after you so I take it you're not just the average gun runner,” I stated and she shot me a glare.

“It's a world run by fucking men, sexist pigs no less!” she snapped and I stepped back. “Oh yeah, act all shocked like you wouldn't know. I could run with the best of you and the brass bloody well fuckin' knew it! I could've been in a combat unit, but NOOOOO! I'm a woman so that makes me inferior!” she shouted in my face, again making me take a step back. “Sticking me to logistics and desk jobs cause I have tits!” she continued to shout. “I could've been a Ranger, a SEAL... a fucking DELTA member, but nooOOOoooo, I don't have a dick!” she continued to shout. “So I said FUCK THE ARMY! Stole a cargo plane of weapons and began dealings with the rebel forces out in the Middle East. THEY, of all people, saw my potential. They let me fight. Let me perform special operations! AND THAT!... Is why your commanders hate me! It's because I'm proof that women can fight just as well as men!” She sounded pretty bitter and resentful towards men.

“Well... maybe they hate you because you're fighting for the rebels... or maybe because you're an arms dealer... or maybe because you stole a cargo plane full of military grade weapons... I dunno. If you were a little less... nutty, you'd probably be a hell of an operative. Why not CIA?” I asked and she just scoffed.

“Pencil pushing pricks,” she shot before giving me a glare. “You've got a job to do. We're not getting paid by the hour. Move like you got a purpose!” she ordered and I gave her a sloppy salute before heading off.

I had the sleeves on my M81 woodland jacket rolled up. A green undershirt didn't help me any as it was on the warm side of things and I had already started to sweat. Our group had been tasked with patrolling the castle and surrounding area to make sure everything was calm and in order for the wedding.

My heavy hitting hand cannon was holstered to my thigh, the holy pearl grips gleaming. With a grumble, my stomach told me it was hungry. Taking a look to my watch, I took note it was late in the day. Remembering that Applejack had been asked to be the cook for the wedding, I got a thought in my head... a genius thought no less.

Taking a detour, I decided to stop by the mess hall to see if perhaps AJ had something cooked up I could... requisition.

As I walked along, I stroked a hand through my short hair. It was growing back at a fairly decent pace and was now about two and a half inches long. I had it nicely combed but regardless of how I did my hair, I still looked like an old man in his late fifties, early sixties.

My eye patch shifted a little and I had to readjust it. Finally reaching the kitchen of the mess hall, I spotted AJ, not wearing her cowpony hat but instead wearing a chef hat. “Heh... hey good looking, whatcha got cooking, how bout cooking, something up fer me...” I began singing quietly to myself but AJ's ear twitched a bit and heard my rather horrible singing then turned to me.

“Oh... howdy there Sugarcube. Uhh, just some apple strudels. Iffen yer hungry ah can cook yah up something tah tide yah over,” she offered and I nodded.

“Hey gal, whatever's clever,” I replied.

“Well, ah reckon ah could cook yah up some apple fritters. Might tide yah over till dinner.” I gave her a nod.

“You know Applejack, you're the best,” I said with a smile and she just rolled her eyes with a faint laugh.

“If yah say so.” She began working away at making, what I could only presume to be, the best apple fritters ever made. Within a few minutes she had the batch mixed up and put in the oven to bake.

“Be a few minutes. Yah can take a load off if yah want.” I took a seat across from her and we both sighed. “So... security detail?” she asked and I just rolled my eye.

“Silly if you ask me. Celestia's royal guard could handle it.” I said and Applejack nodded.

“But ah will say... those ponies are pretty scary lookin,” she made note and I nodded. Just as long as they didn't try anything aggressive, nopony should have a problem with them totting firearms.

“So... Chrysalis?” I asked, bringing up the topic of the changeling queen. Applejack didn't answer at first and just thought about the topic.

“Well... we did reform Discord... though ah suppose he was never truly bad, more like a spoiled brat... but then again, Chrysalis wasn't all that bad neither. Not like she tried to hurt nopony, was just looking for love to feed off of... ah dunno. Everypony can change ah suppose. And ah reckon she ain't gonna do much seein as how there's those macho ponies running around with them... shooty things like yers.” I nodded. I guess she was right in a way. Everyone can change.

'Shooty things... heh...' I thought to myself. I drew out my hulking pistol that, by most human standards, was considered too bulky and heavy for comfortable shooting... whinny little limp wristed girls.

Setting the handgun down on the table, I took out a cloth and wiped off the finger prints on the gun, giving it a real shine. “I don't think having these around is really necessary...” I muttered and Applejack just shrugged.

“Don't reckon most of the stuff she has set up fer the weddin' is necessary. But you know how brides can get,” she mentioned but I shook my head.

“I've only ever gone to funerals. One wedding but I can't really remember it,” I stated and her expression went pale.

“Oh... uhh... sorry teh hear that.” I kinda killed the mood with that statement and decided to start on a different topic. Stuffing the hand cannon back in my holster I asked about her.

“So, you like this?” I asked, motioning to the kitchen area and she shrugged.

“Ah can manage. Kinda... strange when yah think about it.” I rose a brow and she took out the figurines that were to go atop the cake. “Prince Blueblood is by most standards... pretty shallow. How in Equestria did he end up falling in love with Chrysalis?” she asked. The question brought up a billion different possibilities, none of which made any sense except the last one.

“Ah dunno,” I replied and she nodded.

“It's kinda been in the back a muh mind since ah started the cake.” We both sat there and thought about it before coming to the conclusion that it didn't really make sense. Applejack spoke again. “Twilight asked Celestia 'bout it, but even Celestia couldn't detect a brainwashin' spell on Blueblood like Chrysalis had used on Shining Armor... and tah add teh that point, she isn't disguised this time 'round so...” she trailed off and I quickly finished her sentence.

“She isn't up to something, and if she is she's being very discreet about it,” I finished and she nodded.

The lingering smell of fresh apple fritters quickly started filling my nostrils. “Mmm... oh man that smells good,” I said. I felt a prickling feeling on the back of my neck but it wasn't a serious twitch. Turning I spotted a head peaking through the doorway with a sheepish look.

“That does smell ever so wonderful...” Queen Chrysalis stepped into the kitchen. I gave a slight curtsy bow, Applejack following suit. It wasn't a full blown bow, just enough to show our respect.

“Howdy,” both Applejack and myself greeted the queen. She gave us a nod, not exactly what one would call appreciative but... well, whatever.

“I was just strolling along and was... enthralled by this most vigorous smell. May I?” she asked politely. Both Applejack and myself shrugged, my southern friend speaking up.

“Well... there is only enough fer one pon-” I cut her short, already knowing what she was going to say.

“She can have mine. It's not like I'm in much of a rush,” I stated and she shot me a stare, one I felt uneasy about.

“Are you not supposed to be patrolling the castle? Running security?” she asked, almost as if she were aggravated with the fact I was getting something to eat.

“Well... actually Kianna is running security but... I mean, let's face it... running around with heavy ordinance is hardly justifiable. Yes it's a royal wedding but it's not like there's an imminent threat over the horizon... I think it's gonna scare ponies more than make them feel at ease,” I replied and at that comment her eyes went slightly wider.

“You think... it would make them suspicious?” she asked, making me cock a brow.

“Well... maybe not suspicious. The ponies might get terrified if they realized what those guns could actually do... and those mercenaries aren't exactly the friendly type. Might be... just a tad bit overboard, in my opinion but hey... it's your wedding Chrysie, do as you like,” I said with a smiling nod.

“Why do you call me that? Chrysie?” she asked and I was taken aback by the comment.

“What?... I... You know...Chrysie, cute as a puppy... Cadance... Behind Blue Eyes... Chrysie, it's me, Burdy. Don't you even reme-” she cut me short with a huge gasp... that almost sounded fake.

“OH, OF COURSE! BURDY! How could I ever have forgotten you?!” she ran into me, quickly squeezing and giving me a tight hug. “I'm so-so very sorry. It's just with the wedding I've had so many things on my mind that it just slipped my thoughts. How could I ever forget you. Why, you look exactly the same as when we last saw each other!” she chimed in an enthusiastic voice.

The last comment made me stifle a laugh that ended up leaving through my nose. “Well... I mean, let's be honest... I'm a little hard on looks these days-” but she cut me off.

“Don't short yourself. You look as good as you ever have!” she continued to appraise me. I mean... anypony with eyesight could see I've aged exceedingly fast but... she was probably just saying that.

“Well... heh-heh... thanks,” I chuckled with a blush. She hugged me harder.

“As a token of my gratitude and apology, I wish to make you head of security for the wedding,” she told me and I stammered for a moment.

“Well... I mean... I uhh... uhm... it's Kianna's crew so-” again she cut me short.

“I think you're more than a capable leader, probably better than she is. I would take it insultingly if you didn't take this offer,” she said with a smile. In that case I couldn't refuse.

“Okay, okay... I'll uhh... I'll just have to round up the crew then,” I stammered timidly. 'Woah... head of security for a royal wedding...'

Applejack removed the hot apple fritters from the oven and set them down. “Careful, they're hot,” she stated and Chrysie looked to me.

“Why not take one for yourself commander. You need the nourishment. I will contact your crew and tell them to meet you in the briefing room for their new orders.” She offered me a fritter for the road.

“Th-thanks!” I gave her a nod, took the fritter and continued on my way, hearing Chrysalis comment on how she had to check on her dress next...

* * *

“THAT'S BULLSHIT!” Kianna roared in my face, the briefing room door shut so her voice wouldn't echo throughout the castle. “YOU LITTLE WEASLY FUCK! I knew you couldn't be trusted! Trying to steal my crew out from under me, well fuck you!” she shouted. I just raised my hands defensively.

“I'm not trying to steal your crew... hell I didn't try to do anything, she just gave the position to me. It's not like I'm gonna take your crew from you... picture me as more... a second in command to the queen,” I stated and she spat at me.

“I don't take orders from men!” she snarled and I just let out a deep exhale.

“Listen, not much has changed from your original plan-” one of the big brutes cut me short.

“Except that you want to make us defenseless,” he commented in a deep tone. I shook my head.

“No, not defenseless... Kianna?” I asked and she grunted to herself.

“What if I say... go fuck yourself. I'm out, and I'm taking my team with me.” She motioned to her team to saddle up and I just shrugged.

“That's a lot of money to toss away... and all you have to do is stand around while two ponies get married. Too bad... guess I'll have to take it all for myself,” I said in a faked depressed voice. I could tell the money was getting to her and she quickly broke down, scowling to herself as she swore.

“Fuck... fuck it, fine!” she swore then flopped out a case. Flipping open the latches she presented to the crew its contents. Inside was a set of five pistols. All were H&K MK23s with the SOCOM style laser and suppressor. Kianna took one, along with both of the heavy troopers and the sniper.

She looked to me. “Well... this is your plan, don't tell me you're making double standards,” she said but I shook my head.

“Well... I mean I already have a sidearm. And besides, isn't that one for her?” I asked, pointing to the ninja. Kianna shook her head and withdrew a twin set of knives and handed them to the ninja. I looked, watching as the ninja took nothing but the knives.

“And you say I have double standards?” I asked but Kianna shook her head.

“She can't use firearms... not effectively anyway. Messes up her rhythm.” I looked to the ninja who stashed one of the knives in an ankle sheath and the other to a chest sheath. “The last one is for you. Why don't you put away that clunky cannon and use something a little bit more effective,” she commented.

I looked to the others, whom, under my order, had changed out of their combat gear and now wore casual attire. The pistols were a little bulky under their wear, but since ponies already had a lack of knowledge about firearms, they wouldn't understand the bulge of a firearm underneath clothing.

Kianna handed me a hip holster which I promptly adjusted to my waist, along with a magazine pouch for two extra mags. Taking the pistol, I racked the slide to ensure the chamber was clear for the time being. I grunted quietly then smirked. “Just like old times.”

Kianna gave me an estranged look but I just shrugged with a smile. Pointing the gun, I flicked on the bulky flashlight, then promptly flicked it off. With it's current configuration, it was heavier than Belladonna, whom was by most human standards just a paperweight.

“Alright... but are you sure you don't wanna give this to her?” I asked, motioning to the ninja. She shook her head.

“Trust me... those knives might be a little more deadly than even your pistol,” she commented. I wasn't sure how serious she was about that, but I doubted it. Kianna strapped her handgun to a waist holster as well, though she still kept her S&W .44 handy on the right side of her hip.

I gave them a nod and Kianna smirked. “Alrighty then... we'll get to it, Boss,” she mentioned and I just rolled my eye as we departed. As good as that apple fritter was, I was starving. I quickly made my way through the castle and back to the kitchen.

I heard chuckling from inside and took a peak. Twilight, along with her main group of friends, had most likely retired for the night and stopped by to get something to eat. To my surprise, Discord was also present.

I made my entry, rather silently as I didn't intend on making myself the center of attention. Regardless however, Applejack spoke up and drew everypony's attention to me. “Well shucks, howdy Mr. Chief of security.” Everypony turned and gave me a nod. Even Twilight's brother and sister were here.

Discord was second to speak. “Well, if you've been promoted, perhaps you should have a new uniform!” he chimed, my clothes quickly transforming into a more stylish dress uniform.

“GAH... it's uhh... it's really not necessary Discord,” I replied. He clapped his paws together but again my clothes were changed to something stylish. I gave a grunt, followed by my clothes again changing into something I didn't really want.

“Ugh... Discord,” I grumbled. “This is silly.”

“Oh, you want silly?” he laughed, turning my clothes into a duck uniform. He and Fluttershy both laughed, whispering something about how cute I was.

“Discord... please, I don't want anything,” I said. He clapped his paws and I was left with nothing but a pair of tighty-whitties. Everypony began to chuckle and I'd have to hand it to him... clever pun on words. Finally he changed me back to the way I was before. I gave an appreciative nod and took a seat, Lassie leaning up against my leg with an all too happy smile.

Looking to the others, I spoke. “So... how's things with... Chrysalis?” I asked. Rarity spoke first about how Chrysalis commented that her dresses were the finest in the land and were beyond all her expectations. Fluttershy said Chrysalis was so enthralled by the musical choir that she actually stayed for over an hour to listen. Pinkie Pie also had nothing but good things to say, stating that Chrysalis stayed around and played games with her.

Rainbow Dash however, was a little grumpy with her tale. “Well... she wouldn't let me show off my Sonic Rainboom... she says she wants to keep it a surprise. She wouldn't even let me show her a little,” she complained and I just chuckled.

Applejack added in that Chrysalis enjoyed the fritters she had made and even apologized for her rudeness in throwing out the bit sized apple fritters the time she had been disguised as Cadance.

Shining Armor however, wasn't all that impressed. “I still say there's something fishy about this,” he commented and I took a smell of the air.

“Nah dude... there's not even a river near by,” I joked and he just sighed.

“I meant it's strange.” His look was bland and unimpressed.

“I know what you meant... I'm just saying that there really isn't... I mean, can you at least give her a second chance? Look at Discord there,” I said and we all turned to Discord, whom was actually sabotaging the cake with spring loaded confetti.

Noticing that we were all looking at him, and Applejack was giving him a most particular glare, he just chuckled and used his magic to change it back. “Okay... he's still a little... even so, he's not bad. He's changed. Look at me, I'm not the brutish shoot first as questions never kind of guy I used to be. I've changed. At least get to know her a little better before you judge her... you know, don't judge a book by it's cover,” I told him and he sighed.

Cadance instead spoke up. “I can understand my husband's mistrust with the changeling queen. She did try to ruin our wedding...” looking to all of us, she turned to her husband. “But perhaps he is right. Would it hurt to at least give her a chance. Besides, Aunt Celestia has the guard on high alert. What could possibly happen dear?” she had a very persuasive voice... more like she was cooing him then really giving him a choice in the matter.

Lassie shifted over and ground her rump into my foot. “Hey... psst,” she said with a sly tone. I looked to her and she wiggled one of her paw digits as though to tell me to lean in close for a secret. “I just thought you'd like to know... I'm in heat,” she snickered, sticking out her tongue and biting it slightly before promptly standing up off my foot and sitting back down in her old spot, though she left a slimy spot on my boot.

'UGH! BUCKIN' REALLY?!' I roared inside my mind. After just a few seconds of fuming disbelief I just sighed and patted her head. She was Lassie and nothing would change the fact I loved her, despite her lewd shenanigans.

Fluttershy looked to Lassie and myself thenthought for a moment. “Oh, Evan... remember that time Chrysalis got a puppy... I mean, it's okay if you don't...” she said in her usual timid voice. I nodded, the memory clear as day in my mind.

Before I could reply however, Lassie jumped up. “WOAH! She's got a dog! Hey wait a minute... dude... is it a dude?” she asked. Fluttershy blinked.

“Well... I uhm... I guess... yes, it was a male golden retriever puppy...” she replied, still as timid as ever. Lassie turned to me with a determined face.

“You have to introduce me to the royal dog!” she ordered and I just laughed. “What?! Seriously dude, I wanna have a dog friend. I feel weirded out always hanging around ponies that think I'm strange cause I talk... no offense guys and gals,” she said to the others.

I chuckled, having for the most part forgotten about the dog. I guess Chrysie was right. Things slip your mind when there's a wedding in the making. “A'right... I'll go talk to Chrysie about you meeting her dog,” I said, standing up as Lassie clapped excitedly.

Just before I went to leave, I patted Shining on the shoulder. “Seriously... she's not that bad. Get to know her before you judge,” I mentioned before leaving. Briskly walking down the halls, my stomach started to grumble. “Ugh... figures... I didn't even get something to eat.”

I decided to rush and find Chrysie. She should be... somewhere in the castle. 'Somewhere in the castle... good one,' my conscious spoke up. I just rolled my eye. “You got a better idea of where to look?!” I snapped.

'Yeah. Royal chambers. Durrrr!' he snapped back. “BRILLIANT!” I chimed and rushed towards where I presumed would be the royal chambers. Rushing down the halls I skidded to a stop and listened. My senses flickered into high gear and my hearing became nearly super-human.

There was... a voice... it wasn't quite Chrysie's but it was close. I slowly crept my way towards the doorway that was partially ajar, a beam of light coming outwards from inside the room. “Ooooh! You stupid buffoon!” the voice shouted and I heard the thump of a body.

I leaned up against the wall and peaked inwards. Inside was... she was a changeling, but not anything like Chrysalis. She didn't feature the insectile wings of my queen friend, instead she had hardened chitin back plates more like that of a beetle. Her legs were also stronger looking and had far less holes in them than the original Chrysalis.

“Did she... change?” I whispered to myself. 004 squirmed beneath her, grunting something about how hideous she was. I'd second to that. She wasn't quite as cute as Chrysalis and didn't have very many redeeming factors.

“GET OFF ME YOU HIDEOUS BEAST!” 004... err... Blue yelled. The yelling echoed down the halls and it was at this moment I realized there was a lack of guards in this area.

“Hideous am I?” She asked, her beetle-like wings springing open, a green gas fuming into the air.

The aroma quickly took me by surprise and made me stagger back. I was taken by complete surprise by the alluring fragrance. “Woah...” I muttered, finding myself instantly hard and wanting to do nothing more than bone that... changeling.

I quickly came to my senses and kicked out the thoughts. My body tensed. 'What the hell is going on?!' I thought to myself, pressing my body up against the wall once more. The fragrance was so strong it nearly debilitated me.

'A fuckin' stink beetle!' my conscious thought and I nodded. A stink beetle indeed... but with a nice smell... I peeked inside and saw that her fragrance had an instant effect on 004, whom was hard as a rock and leaking precum all over himself.

“Hideous am I?” she asked in a delightful tone. Bluey nearly began to weep.

“I'm so sorry for my outburst. My love, please forgive me!” he nearly cried.

“Hmm... perhaps... but I want the castle... I want Equestria. I want it all,” she told him and he nodded.

“Of course. Anything for you!” he whimpered. I didn't have time for this. I burst through the door, nearly taking the doors off their hinges.

“FREEZE! DON'T MOVE!” I boomed, the changeling jumping back, her wings springing out. The H&K MK23 SOCOM was pointed in her direction, my aim unwavering. “ON THE GROUND, FACE DOWN!” I roared. She took a step back and I couldn't help but find her more and more sexually attractive... by the second.

“ON THE GROUND, NOW!” I ordered in a violent tone. I had to shake my head to get the sexual thoughts off my mind... I just wanted to bend her over and pork her. She must've saw it in my eyes because she turned around and gave me a full view of her rump.

Wings splayed wide, I felt a misty feeling coming over me, like a gentle sprinkle during a summer day. “Are you sure there isn't something I can do to make it up to you?” she cooed. I quickly shook my head, taking my view off her glistening pussy and popping off two rounds beside her hooves... or whatever one might call them.

She jumped back with a startled yelp. “Get... down...” my voice staggered as I felt woozy.

“Is that how you wish to take me?” she asked, laying on her stomach with her rump high in the air, at perfect crotch level so that I wouldn't have to do any elevation adjustments...

'UGGHHH! WHAT AM I THINKING! PLUG HER... NO, NOT LIKE THAT!' My conscious roared. My senses flared and unnaturally picked up the presence of somepony right next to me.

Without even looking I could see the barrel of a pistol being pointed at my head. I already somehow knew it was Kianna. In a flash I sidestepped, moving my body to the outside of her arm as my left hand slapped her hand to the right, whilst my other hand dropped the H&K MK23 and chopped at her wrist. I would've preferred using the pistol to end this, but with the suppressor attached, landing a fatal shot would be difficult at such close range. Striking her nerves, her grip on the pistol was broken and she unwillingly let her handgun fall to the ground.

Cursing, she drew out her S&W revolver and tried to get a crack shot off at me. The first and second shots were strays and missed horribly. Bringing her gun up to aim, my right palm hit her wrist hard, redirecting her aim to the left as she fired off yet another shot. Trying painfully to swing the gun back to it's target as fast as possible, her movements were faster than I'd normally be able to counter.

I ducked my head slightly and used my left hand to slap her aim to the right, again the shot missing horribly. She tried to get another bead on me but again I struck her wrist and knocked her aim far off target.

The gunshot was deafening, the bullet blowing a hole in the floor just by my feet. I hammered my left hand into the crevice of her elbow, making her arm go limp. Right hand gripping the bottom of her revolver, I cocked her arm back, trying to use her own revolver to blast her away, only to have the gun go off prematurely and put a hole in the roof.

I felt one of her knees hit me in the groin, making me gag and stagger back. Lining her piece with my head she laughed. “Nice technique, but I guess you were right. You're not special forces material. Not even close,” she commented as I tried painfully to regain my posture but found myself staggering unnaturally, even taking into consideration I had taken a blow to the jems.

“Yeah... but neither are you. That revolver is nice for silhouette shooting. The ability to add and reduce the weight of the barrel end is a nice touch, giving the user the ability to customize the gun to their preference. The addition of a rail system for laser sights or a flashlight is nice too but the gun is a little bulky and takes longer to reload than that of a magazine fed gun... and besides,” I said as I stood up casually.

“You don't have what it takes to kill me,” I stated and she squeezed the trigger, the hammer slamming down and making an audible CLICK! Again she squeezed the trigger. CLICK! She squeezed the trigger several times only resulting in more clicking and the cylinder being rotated.

“Six shots... revolvers only have six shots. You have to become accustomed to your gun to use it effectively... even so, a revolver will generally always have a low capacity,” I mentioned but then she just laughed and holstered the gun.

I tried to move to draw my own handgun but found I could barely budge. I began to lean to one side and stagger back. The changeling giggled wildly. “I'm impressed.” I turned to her and noticed that Blue was unconscious.

“This whole time I've been releasing a constant, mass amount of pheromone aphrodisiac yet you were able to resist it. Most ponies are debilitated in a matter of seconds. Even so, extensive exposure to such a large volume in a poorly ventilated room such as this leads to unconsciousness in a matter of seconds. I'm impressed that you were able to stand your ground and even fight for well over a few minutes... even so, in a few seconds you're going to pass out and there's nothing you can do about it at this point." I turned to look to Kianna and only then did I realize she had a small mouthpiece, probably a breathing apparatus of some sort, tucked into her mouth.

I fell onto my back and heard Kianna saying something about how we'd have to clean up fast since the guards would be here any second due to the noise. Spotting my H&K MK23, I reached over and grabbed it, sloppily swinging my aim towards them. Even so, my aim was horrible and I could hardly manage to move my fingers properly. Kianna laughed and reached down, grabbing the pistol from my grip. “Is this for me? Why thank you,” she cackled before whipping the hilt across my temple and knocking me into unconsciousness...

* * *

Third person...

The stallion's forelegs fell to the changeling queen's sides as his hips met hers. “Oh baby, I've been waiting so long for this. Take me,” said a feminine voice.

“The pleasure will be all mine, my queen,” said an almost equally feminine voice as the stallion started his slow thrusts.

“Ohhh yes, it's so big. I can feel you deep inside of me. Pound me harder,” whined the first voice. The stallion started to sloppily thrust his hips harder into the changeling queen's rump, the sounds of their lovemaking echoing for all to hear.

The second voice spoke up not long after. “Oh... oh baby... oh I'm gonna cum!” the voice cried out. Their motions became quicker and quicker. The first voice squealed out in excitement.

“Oh yes... oh please cum inside of me. Fill me with your hot seed!”

The stallion's pace became erratic and jerky. “Ahhh! Ahhh, ughhh! UGH!” the second voice grunted out primal vocals of climaxing pleasure as the stallion made one final jerking thrust into the changeling queen.

Lassie moved the two figurines apart and took some icing off the cake, quickly applying it to the changeling figurine's crotch then putting the stallion atop as though they were having sex then started to make lewd sound effects again.

“Ugh... ohh baby, I'm cumming inside of you,” Lassie said in a slightly less feminine tone.

“Ooooh, yes I can feel your hot seed filling my tight pussy,” she said in a more girly tone. Lassie made the stallion figurine make small twitchy jerks, as though he was dumping his load into the queen. The icing she had applied dripped down the queen's thighs and onto the floor.

“LASSIE!” Applejack shouted and snatched the figurines from the horny mutt. “That's... disturbin',” AJ said with a shudder and Lassie just sighed.

“Pfft... you liked it,” she said before mingling to go cause some other hectic, and rather lewd, chaos...

Author's Note

So this other author, Plunes, and I were talking a long time ago about the return of Chrysalis into the story since it seemed rather fitting. Yeah, I know, it's kinda a rip off of the episode, but it's also got it's own twist and it leads into the ending of the story so... what can I do.
So sorry for the update time too. I was really busy and didn't want to just force out a chapter (We all went to Canterlot and met Chrysalis. She didn't seem the same as I remembered. Nopony had any idea what to think... yeah, that was my original draft believe it or not)
Anywho, I've just been tired after work... but hey, I got three new guns this weekend. A Winchester combat shotgun, a Bakers Ceremonial muzzle loader rifle and a TT33 handgun so... I dunno, I'm pretty happy, and maybe you guys will be to with the release of this new chapter? (Sorry if it's a dissapointment:fluttercry:)

Chapter 57

'Behind Blue Eyes...'

My mind was hazy... everything was a blur. My stomach churned, head spinning... this was worse than any flu I'd ever had. I heard voices. They sounded... distant and faded yet my almost superhuman senses told me they were close, within a few feet of my body.

“Such an amazing specimen.” Said one voice, followed by a scoff.

“Hardly, he's quite old,” said a second.

“If he could resist my pheromones for that long, whilst still going hoof-to-hoof with you in combat, even when you had the drop on him...” the first trailed off.

“So what should we do with him?” asked the second.

“Hmm... it would be such a waste to just kill him off. Blueblood is hardly a remarkable being. I think after everything is done, I'll do away with him...” she trailed off again. “Afterwards, I'll breed with this one. I do believe he would make for a profound mate.” Again the second scoffed at the first's statement.

“Have fun trying to fuck him. He'd probably rip you in half,” the second laughed snidely.

“How I mate with him will be non of your concern. I believe we'll reach an agreement... but in the mean time. Zypher!” the first snapped. I could sense the arrival of another presence. “Mimic his appearance. I wouldn't want any suspicion arising over his sudden disappearance.”

The new arrival spoke. “What was his usual routine?” the masculine voice asked.

“You're head of security. That shouldn't be too hard to copy, should it?” the first stated.

“Anything else? Personal matters?” he asked and there was a pause.

“Drat, I really wish I had researched this fellow more. Apparently he climbed Mount Tia and is an elite combat operative... and I think he has an intimate relationship with the orange one, Applejack they call her. He was sweet talking her earlier when he went to get something to eat. Play the part, and don't arouse suspicion. Shining Armor is already poking his head where it doesn't belong.”

The second voice from before spoke up again. “So where do you want him in the meantime. I hardly think stuffing him in a closet will do. Bastard survived a waterfall, getting sprayed with bullets, Mount Tia-” she was cut off by the first.

"He may be remarkable but he is by no means superficial." The first spoke up for a final time. “Put him with the other. She hasn't escaped yet so I don't reckon he will be able to do so either.” I felt an impact hit my skull before everything went black again...

* * *

Third person...

Kianna tried to heave the unconscious body onto her shoulder but could barely get his torso off the ground. “Holy shit... this... grrr... fuck!” she swore before letting go of his body. “Christ he weighs a ton...” she commented then looked to one of her heavy troops. “Help me out,” she ordered, the bulky stallion hefting him up onto his back.

“Jeeze... what's this guy eat? Cement?” he commented, immediately feeling the big man's weight weighing him down. The group looked to the other changeling who flashed green just before his entire stature changed. He became bipedal and rather large, clothes appearing on his body to match that of the unconscious man's.

“How do I look?” he asked but Kianna shook her head.

“A bit bulkier and with a deeper tone,” she said. His body stretched out slightly more and he deepened his voice.

“How's this?” he asked and the woman nodded before tossing him Burdy's MK23.

“Don't use it unless you have to.” Zypher, the changeling male, nodded in return.

“What about that big one? The shiny one?” he asked, commenting about Burdy's hand cannon.

“We all switched to these pistols to be matching. I'll stow this away somewhere. If you start carrying it instead of that one I gave you, it might arise suspicion...” the woman turned to the other changeling in the room. “And we wouldn't want that, right boss?” she asked rhetorically.

“Indeed. Now all of you get back to your duties!” she snapped. The group all left, Kianna and her group going one way, the doppelganger Burdy going another direction.

Kianna's crew split off in different directions, only the heavy trooper carrying Burdy followed her to the sub levels of the castle below. Going deeper into the, for the most part, untraveled parts of the castle and eventually reaching a medium sized set of doors.

Kianna spoke first. “It used to be an old mine or something. Apparently this is where Chrysalis hid Cadance the first time...” she mentioned. The heavy trooper spoke up.

“So... wouldn't this be the first place to look?” he asked but she shook her head.

“Not if he isn't missing,” she chuckled as the stallion loaded the body into a mining cart. Kianna drew out Burdy's handgun and admired it for the time being. “You know... I wouldn't mind getting myself one of these,” she commented.

“So just take his,” the stallion stated bluntly as he opened the set of miner doors.

Kianna shook her head. “It's his. Ponies would notice,” she replied before taking hold of the mining cart. “Get back to your patrols... I can take it from here,” she informed him. He nodded and made his way out.

Kianna looked to the big man in the cart, then to his handgun and thought back on what her squad mate said about just taking the gun. “I haven't earned it yet,” she mentioned before racking the slide and chambering a round. She held her thumb on the spur of the hammer and depressed it slowly before flicking on the safety and ejecting the magazine. Loading one more shell into the mag, she quickly slapped the full magazine back into the well and stuffed the hand cannon back in the man's custom holster.

The idea of the man becoming a breeding tool was a disgrace in her mind, and hardly the fate that should be rendered upon him. She poked him in the chest as she latched the strap on his holster to keep his handgun properly holstered. “Don't go dying on me just yet,” she commented before beginning to push him down into the mines...

* * *

Zypher walked about on his patrols, feeling slightly uneasy about it. One wrong move and he could blow his cover and everything would be ruined. As he continued along, his stomach grumbled slightly. 'The orange one, Applejack they call her,' his memory surfaced what his queen had told him. She was, by recorded accounts, a good cook as well.

The smell of apple-cinnamon filled his nostrils. It was the most alluring smell he had ever taken in... but that may have been his stomach speaking. He nearly fluttered along as he followed the most enticing smell, quickly finding himself at the kitchen which was, by first glance, empty.

Sniffing the air, he made his way into the kitchen and quickly found the source of the smell. Looking at the baked apple pie, his stomach grumbled louder than it ever had before. It was so tantalizing. He quickly wondered to himself if perhaps this pie was for the wedding or...

“Hey there Burdy,” spoke a southern accent that took Zypher by surprise and made him jump, nearly losing his disguise. He turned to see the orange mare, whom he presumed the queen had spoken of, approaching him.

“H-hey,” he stammered, a little unsure about how to speak with her. 'Think... couples,' he thought to himself.

“Ah left out some food fer yah... seein' as 'ow yah never got much tah eat,” she said. She was really cute, and he smiled brightly inside. How lucky he had gotten to be assigned as the disguise for this man along with being intimately involved with this mare through his disguise. Things couldn't be better.

“Thanks baby,” he said before leaning over to give her a kiss. Applejack quickly backpedaled.

“What are yah doin'?” she gasped and Zypher again was shocked.

“Uhh... I uhm... you know?” he replied, figuring perhaps their way of intimacy was different than how he learned.

“No... ah don't know. But yah better start explainin' yerself mister!” she shouted. Zypher bit his lip, quickly thinking about what to say.

“Honey, please don't be-” Applejack quickly cut him short.

“Huney?! What in tarnation's gotten inta yah?!” she yelled and his stomach grumbled, almost louder than Applejack. “Yah better knock off whatever's gotten inta yer head and go speak with Twilight, cause ah don't like tah think where yah'll headed!” she yelled but again his stomach grumbled.

“I uhm... I can't really think,” Zypher stammered out, his hunger needing to be tided over so he could think up an excuse. His stomach again groaned out, in dire need of that mind numbing apple pie.

Applejack blinked. “Are yah... feelin' all right?” she asked but Zypher shook his head. Generally changelings fed on love, but he was willing to be, one million percent, that apple pie would suffice his needs.

“I'm starving...” he mumbled, still feverish about her outburst and wondering whether or not it had blown his cover. Applejack pulled a chair up to the table.

“Well... best be havin' a bite tah eat... then yah can explain yerself,” she told him. He quickly obliged and took his seat, his stomach having a sinking feeling but also a starving one. Applejack sat across from him as he quickly devoured the pie, savoring every little bit and even licking the tray clean.

Tided over, he sighed contently, almost forgetting about the problem on hoof. “So... mind explainin' what in blue blazes has gotten inta yah?” she asked and Zypher thought up a lie so quick he nearly surprised himself.

“I'm so sorry Applejack. It's just with the wedding, and everything else, I got so hungry I couldn't think properly. It just... everything sorta slipped outta my mouth without me even thinking about it. Words just sorta fell outta my mouth, yah know?” he replied and Applejack sighed.

“Well then... yah best be keepin' yerself fed. Yah don't wanna upset Twilight, 'specially with everything in consideration,” she commented and he nodded.

“Yes, I know. I'm so sorry AJ... and if, you know... best forget this ever happened?” he suggested and she nodded, pulling out a tray of apple fritters.

“Well, in any case, best take these fer the road. Keep yerself fed 'n' what not,” she said, Zypher quickly taking the tray with him, giving the mare a nod and proceeding out the kitchen doors. He walked along on his new bipedal legs, holding the tray of freshly baked fritters in his hands. He let out a relieved exhale as he left. That... was too close. 'Our intelligence committee sucks.'

The changeling wiggled his fingers as he downed some apple fritters, licking the glazing off his fingers when he was done. “Damn these things come in handy... this guy's got it made,” he mentioned. Though love was the most nutritious thing for a changeling, he couldn't help but to feel overly satisfied with the fritters, chomping them away one by one and within minutes finding himself out of the tasty little morsels and wanting more.

“Maybe tomorrow,” he told himself, taking a look at the time and realizing it was very late in the night. It was a surprise she had even been up and he didn't want to pester her to bake him some more, regardless of how good they were.

As he continued along his hand fell to the firearm placed on his hip. Drawing it out, he looked at it most curiously. Apparently they were more dangerous than any weapon Equestria, or any other nation for that matter, had to offer.

He hadn't been instructed on how to use it, but from the looks of it all he had to do was use one of his fingers to pull back on that lever that was semi-protected by the metal guard around it.

Extending his arms and holding the gun in both hands, he noticed the sights. There was one up front, and a notch in the back. There were three green illuminative dots, two on the rear notch and one on the front post. He quickly came to the assumption that by placing the front post perfectly between the notch of the rear sight, that would indicate where his shot would be placed.

“Hmm...” he smiled to himself. After this was all over, he wouldn't mind getting one from Kianna for himself, maybe a bigger one like what those two troopers of hers carried. He quickly slid the handgun back into its holster and continued on, figuring it best not to play with the gun in case he did something that would make it go off.

He continued mingling through the hallways but stopped as he came across two guards standing duty. Zypher waited for a moment and tilted his head to the side. Minutes past and soon enough a cute petite mare walked in front of the two stallion guards, giving a giggle and mentioning something about how big tough guards get her so wet then fluffed her tail in their direction.

The two stallions lost concentration and mindlessly followed the mare away. A few more minutes past and the stallions returned and stood guard once more. The doppelganger casually strode past them, both stallions giving him a wink as he did so.

He continued along with a smile, knowing full well as long as everyone completed their task, the queen's plan would perform perfectly. Walking along, he soon found his hand drifting down to that handgun again.

Whatever it was about the pistol made him feel... empowered. As though he had utmost authority over everyone else, even as much as the queen. “Evan, Darling,” came a breathtaking voice from behind him. He turned around, only to be taken off guard by the most beautiful mare... most beautiful anything, he had ever seen.

Rarity stood before him, her hair finely combed. She wore a rather plain white dress that draped down but stopped short of her hooves. “Darling, I require some... assistance,” she said, and that was all she needed to say.

His jaw sat slightly slacked, struck in awe from the mare's stunning beauty. “Uh-huh...” he mumbled before shaking his head and simply nodding. “Of course, ma'am,” he replied. Rarity just giggled.

“Please darling. You can just call me Rarity, you know that,” she said, turning and leading the way. He realized this is what the two guards must've felt like. Captivated. Had the queen ordered him right this moment to return to patrol, he'd probably go AWOL.

He couldn't keep his eyes from her flank, watching it sway with each step she took. In moments he found that his body was swaying in much the same way she was, his body following her every movement.

A sudden growth in his pants stretched a tent formation but he didn't care. There was a lingering smell in the air, one he couldn't help but shake from his mind. They reached Rarity's room and she led him inside. “Do you think you could be a dear and help me with my dresses. I'm having this problem that's rather... unavoidable,” she asked, though she didn't really need to.

“Yupp...” he stated. Rarity closed the door behind him and locked it. That 'click' of the lock made his cock throb in his pants.

“I just need some help measuring lengths and girths,” she stated, trotting over to a mannequin that was fitted with a dress.

'Wait! What?! Dresses... really? DAMMIT!' Zypher's head drooped in defeat. She hadn't specifically said they were going to the proverbial bedroom but that's what he was immediately hoping for.

A soothing tune reached Zypher's ears as Rarity put on a gramophone. He looked to see Rarity slowly slipping out of her dress in a very erotic way. Despite the fact most ponies didn't wear clothes, watching the act had him rock hard and ever hopeful that he may still get lucky.

The smell from before hit Zypher and he quickly realized it was the pheromones of a mare in heat. He shuddered feverishly, his erection throbbing in his pants. 'Please goddess... oh please...' he prayed as he stood there idly.

Rarity pulled out a measure tape then turned back to the doppelganger. Zypher quickly made note to himself that he couldn't just stand around like an idiot. He'd have to make some initiative that he wasn't just standing around waiting for some piece of ass.

Rarity waited patiently as the bulky man stood next to her. “Just some basic measurements darling. You know, length and girth... those sorts of thing,” she said, somewhat coyly. She was planning, by most parts, to play fairly.

Applejack had scorned her about her approaches to Evan in the past, so her plan was to let him make the first move, then simply throw herself on him. It wasn't like it would be her fault, just as long as he made the first move.

She quickly shook her head, conflicted about the idea of it. 'She's going to have a foal. Rarity, you shouldn't do this!' she scorned herself angrily, but was quickly engulfed by the overwhelming sensation of her estrus that had struck just hours ago. 'What she doesn't know... can't hurt, right?' she thought mischievously.

As Evan, or whom she figured to be, approached, her tail naturally rose just ever so slightly, inviting him forwards but not in an all too obvious way. He stood idly next to her and she handed him the tape measure. “I'll take the tip...” she slowly leaned her head forwards and extended her tongue, giving the end a small and most gentle lick with her tongue before taking it into her mouth.

She could tell, just by the man's body language... and by the tent in his pants, she was having an effect on him. But alas, she would let him make the first move. Taking the end of the tape, she pulled it along to the front of the dress, making sure her rump was directed his way.

“The flank darling?” she asked, making note for him to measure to the rear of the dress.

“Duh... what?” he asked, obviously lost in his lustful imagination.

“Measure to the flank darling?” she asked again, being a little more prompt this time. He nodded then quickly rolled the tape out to the flank, but didn't measure it and simply kept staring at her flank. “What is it?” she asked, putting double meaning into her question.

“Perfect...” he said in a hushed tone as he looked to her flank. Her tail, to his utter dismay, had censored her most intimate parts this whole time.

“I don't recall having perfect as being a measurement darling, but thank you for the compliment,” she remarked, shaking the man out of his daze. She had tried several times before to crack his naive nature but had little success. She thought perhaps finally she had chiseled away enough to crack him.

“What do you think of the dress darling?” she asked, taking hold of the measure tape and making it look as though she was performing more measurements, though in reality she was just positioning herself in erotic poses. Though even so, she kept her nethers hidden from view with her tail.

“It's beautiful,” the man replied.

“Would I look good in it?” she asked, swaying her rump to and fro, further tantalizing him.

“Amazing, but...” he trailed off and she perked a brow, looking up over her shoulder to see the effects she was undoubtedly having on him.

“But?” she asked and he shook his head.

“Uhh, but nothing. There's no butts in perfect... err... well... uhm...” he stammered. She raised her tail just ever so slightly, letting him get a glimpse of just the outer lips of her slit, but not the whole picture. He bit his lip as Rarity licked hers in an erotic way.

“So, darling... there's been something on my mind for ever so long and it's been... keeping me up at night. All those nights, I spend alone in my bed with nopony there to comfort me in my time of unrest...” she trailed off, her hindlegs spreading apart slightly. She turned her attention subtly back to the dress.

“Please, answer honestly when I ask you. What do you think of me?” she asked, leaning over and putting an arch in her back, keeping her rump held high as her tail fluffed to the side, revealing her glistening pussy for him to marvel at.

She felt his hand stroke along her flank, a purr of pleasure emitting from her mouth. Her back arched more and her pussy winked at him. “Mmm...” Rarity moaned out just as a second hand went to work on her opposite flank cheek, both hands rubbing on the respective cheek's cutie mark.

Rarity whined out a moan and simply pressed her rump into his crotch, feeling his thick cock through his pants and rubbing against it attentively, feeling it pulse with every movement. “I'll take that as a...” she trailed off with a sharp inhale. Zypher didn't speak another word, simply gripping her plot tightly and pulling her into him.

A thought quickly zipped through the changeling's mind. Had this man ever been intimate with this mare, then she'd know what his private parts looked like... and he currently didn't. Matter of factually, his cock was still in it's native form. The waves of euphoria rushing through his body simply made him disguise it as an equine style length, with the complexity of the man's tanned skin.

The mare began to grind into him as he thrust himself into her. “Ohh... mmm, darling you have no idea how long I've waited for this,” she moaned out, taking a load off the changeling's mind as that no doubt meant the two hadn't had intercourse before.

Rarity was stuck in a tidal wave of mind numbing pleasure, despite having not yet even been penatrated. “Oooh... darling, take me. My body is ready,” she whined out, her horn flaring with magic and slipping his belt off. The man was quick to pull off his shirt but Rarity stopped him.

“Perhaps... on second though...” she trailed off, turning around and moving up to the man. Her hoof ran down his torso, feeling his every curve and muscle in a slow and sensual way. She moved to her hindlegs and pressed up against him, embracing in a passionate kiss.

Their tongues danced together and for a moment Rarity thought about how peculiar his tongue texture was, but quickly brushed it off as nothing. Her magic went to work on his pants, quickly stripping them off as she laid him down on the bed. He was quickly submitted by the mare, in no state whatsoever to deny her of any passion she had craved for an unbearable amount of time.

Stopping for a moment, she gave him a lustful look, the best bedroom eyes she could muster and it was all she needed to do. She felt him struggling beneath her, rushing to get his briefs off. She put her fore-hooves down on his arms, stopping him for the time being.

“I'll get those,” she told him as she slowly rearranged her self in a 69 position. She hadn't even gotten hold of his underwear when she felt the mind numbing sensation of his tongue going to work on her slit. She quivered, nearly going into a state of spasm as she quickly drove her rump into the mans face, his tongue piercing her tight little pussy and forcing a squeal of pleasure from her mouth.

Yanking off his boxers, she was bestowed with his towering erection that, by quick judgment, must have been at least 18inches. Her mouth gaped open, like her quivering pussy would undoubtedly do when he penetrated her.

“It's huge...” she whispered to herself, wondering how Twilight ever took such a lengthy piece of meat. Nonetheless she went to work on him in a lustful endeavor. At first she just brushed her cheek up against it, taking in a lungful of his husky scent. Her tongue started at the base of his cock and traveled upwards, which she quickly realized had a remarkable resemblance to that of an equine shaft.

Her tongue ran laps up and down his length, both of them in a state of complete bliss as they felated each other. Rarity felt as though every fantasy she had about the man was finally coming true.

His tongue lapped up every drop of her juices that was dripping out of her like a leaky faucet. Her legs kept quivering uncontrollably and she found herself biting her lip every so often to stifle a very feminine moan.

Licking around the tip of is cock, she quickly took it in, forcing it down as far as she could but finding herself to luck out at around half his length. But she wouldn't stop there, not wanting to disappoint the man she had lusted over for the longest of time. If she couldn't take the whole length she'd just have to improvise.

Her horn lit up and a magical aura covered the lower half of his length, stroking it in unison with the bobbing of her head. She felt the man grunt and moan into her pussy, a smile coming across her face as she knew she was having the exact same effect on him as he was on her.

Within moments she felt his cock begin to swell inside her throat. Looking to please him, she shoved his cock as far down her throat as she could, holding back her gag reflex as she felt the head flare inside her.

A load of sticky hot cum blasted down to her gullet. She felt him grunt into her pussy, a sure sign of satisfaction as she clenched her eyes shut, another load getting dumped into her throat. She moaned, her vocals getting stopped by the thick cock lodged down her throat. Moments passed as the man unloaded into her. Finally done, yet still rock hard, Rarity withdrew his cock from her mouth, strands of green cum dripping down from her lip. She leaned down and placed an attentive kiss to the head of the cock.

The man nearly froze as he saw his native colored semen but was put at ease as the mare didn't take any suspicious notice of his oddly colored cum. She rearranged herself atop him, pressing her lips lustfully to his, tasting her own juices as he did his.

The man was quick to spread her flank cheeks apart, rising his massive obelisk to her soaking entrance. The duo both let out a gasp as their most intimate parts met. Savoring the moment, the doppelganger popped just the head of his shaft into the mare, getting a slight whine from her.

Having been patient enough in waiting for this moment for the last few months, Rarity let herself drop and take the man's entire length with one short stroke. She let out a howling scream of pleasure as she immediately reached her peak. Her inner walls squeezed around the intruding member that was buried inside of her. With a deep exhale, the man grabbed her flanks and pulled her hips into his just a slight bit further, feeling his tip grinding against her cervix.

She straddled herself atop him, her hooves resting against his finely toned chest. Her rump rose and fell, a squelching sound echoing in the room with every movement. Despite being in heat, her tight little pussy fit like the perfect glove around the man, stretching wide to accommodate him yet not too tight as to cause discomfort.

Looking down to where all the action was happening, Zypher could see a small bulge in her stomach that moved along with their movements. He could see how deep he was inside the mare. Moving his hips at a more earnest pace, he kept the mare above him in a constant state of orgasmic high.

Her increased tightness added to the pleasure both partners felt as she continued to straddle him, albeit rather sloppily. Taking notice she was in no real state to be the dominant one, Zypher rolled the mare to her back, pinning her beneath him. Having slipped out of the mare he rearranged himself atop her.

Remembering that the mare's pussy was slightly too small to accommodate his entire length, he secretly shortened the length of his cock by just two inches, hoping she wouldn't notice. Pressing his cock to her entrance, he easily slid into the well lubricated hole and found himself hilted inside the mare, balls deep and on the verge of orgasm.

“Mmm, yes, buck me Burdy. Make me your mare. Fulfill your every desires and sate yourself with my body.” Zypher blinked. Sure the mare was in heat, but she was going absolutely wild over him.

'This guy... is sooo lucky,' he thought to himself, wondering just how many other mares were this crazy over him. Her hindlegs wrapped around his back, pulling him in tighter as her began to thrust into the lusty mare.

He could literally feel every single muscle inside of her gently milking him, trying desperatly to coax him into cumming into her. He thought to himself. After the queen's plans succeeded, he'd have every mare at his disposal... but he may only want this one.

He continued to pound away at her, every thrust rubbing his head up against her cervix and keeping her in a blissful ongoing orgasm. Her wet juices dampened the fur all down her thighs, and slicked up against his as well.

Zypher generally proved himself to have a longer endurance in the bedroom, even though his genes inhibited from successful mating that didn't stop him from the occasional roll in the hay with females. But this mare... Rarity they called her... her name said it all. Rare. Beautiful, exquisite and far better in bed than anyone he'd ever been with.

A gush of warm marecum splashed out against his thighs, the warmth, along with the thought of it, made him grunt, a sudden and intense tidal wave of pleasure rocking his entire body as he drove himself into her deepest depths and let loose a torrent of cum.

Her inner muscles milked him for every drop. Having been his second cumming in less than ten minutes, much to his regret, her pussy was able to milk him for his entire load, not a single drip of it escaping.

He let out a massive exhale, flopping back as soon as his balls were emptied into the mare. His cock pulled out of her now gaping pussy with an audible 'plop', followed by the erotic sight of the mare's twitching, gaping love hole.

The sight was definitely one Zypher would keep in his memory banks but was shocked to find the mare dragging herself over him. “If you wouldn't mind darling, Burdy... seeing as how you're still hard... I want you where no stallion has ever been,” she told him, lowering her flank down towards his still erect, and well lubricated member.

'Never been? But she wasn't a-' “AHHH!” His thoughts turned vocal as he felt the mare begin to slowly impale her puckered tail hole onto his cock. At first the mare peeped in discomfort and pain, her little sphincter immediately trying to repel the invading member.

Zypher gasped in shock as he realized what she was about to do. “Rarity!” he gasped but she held a hoof to his mouth.

“I want this darling. It's special,” she informed him, taking inch by agonizing inch of the changeling man's dick. Had he the chance, he would've quickly shrunk his size in a heartbeat to alleviate the pain the poor mare was experiencing. He had heartlessly taken several mares virginity's before but she... she was different somehow, even if it was her anal virginity.

Stopping halfway, Rarity began ascending. Zypher wondered if she had enough but just before she reached the tip, she began a descent, making it a few inches further towards his sheath.

He bit his lips as she continued this pattern. His hands trembled to her sides. He didn't want to force her like he had a few others. Something felt... different. She started downwards for the twelfth or thirteenth time but found herself struggling on his medial ring. She huffed in a mix of pain and overwhelming pleasure.

Her hooves landed on his chest, yelping as she forced herself down on him. His ring slid into her convulsing anus and with the extra force put into her thrust, she found herself impaled with his entire length, her flanks resting just atop his balls.

She sat like that for several moments, the duo gasping. Rarity looked to him and quickly leaned down to force her muzzle upon his mouth. Their tongues began to dance once more, Zypher letting the mare dominate him for the most part.

He could feel her anus working on him, but unlike her pussy, her anus seemed to try and drive him out, yet all the same it felt fantastic. It was a lot tighter, to the point it was nearly uncomfortable but alas it was just bearable.

Rarity pulled away from the kiss, a string of saliva connecting the their mouths. With an almost painful ascension, she quickly slid herself back down with a low toned moan. He could tell this was painful for her but he also knew the pain was starting to subside. Rarity spoke through a gasp that was mostly filled with pleasure. “This is so... so different. It feels strange,” she whispered.

Zypher gasped, shocked that he was already nearing another orgasm. Every time she descended the friction of her inner muscles trying to push him back out drove him to a new milestone of pleasure.

She was definitely something else. Realizing perhaps he could help the mare with his new found appendages, his fingers found themselves put to work. His thumb rubbed the little nub at the tip of her slit, making Rarity wail out in a blissful and purely pleasured moan.

While his thumb went to work on her clit, his index and middle fingers slid into her well lubed slit. Despite having just been gaped open just minutes ago, she was already clasping down with a tight grip on his fingers, so much so that he doubted he could fit a third unless he forced it, which may cause further pain to the mare.

Even though he lacked experience with the fingers, he found himself quickly bringing the mare onto the brink of an orgasm. He couldn't really tell by her body language, but by the feeling of her pussy around his fingers. She was contrasting around him, and her sphincter was clenching against his shaft, each thrust of hers made her anal opening feel like a ring sliding up and down his length.

He grabbed her flank in an uncontrollable lust and began guiding her movements, making diligent not to be overly rough with her. He continued fingering her sloppy pussy which was just now starting to leak out his green tinted cum. His stomach nearly lurched but again he was settled when the mare didn't seem to notice, or much less care.

He found his intruding fingers going knuckle deep with each of his strokes, exploring her creamed depths as his member plundered her tail hole. The friction of her convulsing anus started to drive him to his peak and he found himself yet again flaring earlier than he'd like to. His increased girth inside the mare made her squeal, marecum drenching down upon the man's fingers along with some more of his essence.

He grunted as his balls tensed up and blew a third, almost minuscule, load into the mare's bowels. She continued to jerk and shiver with each of his pulses. After several minutes of holding that pose she collapsed upon the man, his member finally shrinking and plopping out of her used hole which oozed cum onto the both of them.

“Darling...” Rarity whispered in a hushed tone that was so gentle it fluttered Zypher's heart. He nodded. “Can you... stay the night with me. I know it's-” he cut her off, holding a finger to her mouth.

“Anything for you,” he said, almost surprised by his own words. He was generally pretty heartless to say the least and on any other mare would have just left as soon as she passed out. That was one of the main reasons for being appointed the right hoof of the queen, by her herself. It was an honor he held greatly...

He pushed away the thoughts of his heartless nature and nestled contently with the mare. Hopefully tonight would be peaceful...

* * *

Burdy's perspective...

I awoke face down on cold stone. My head was thumping heavily, which aided in awaking me quickly and reminding me of the dire situation. I quickly rose to a knelt position but then realized it was pitch dark where I was.

“Ahhh... ugh!” I groaned, a hand rising to cradle my forehead and as I did so, my hand brushed against the Eagle Eye which I remarkably still had. I flicked it on, turning on it's night-vision mode. Everything around me lit up for my only good eye to see.

It was cold down here, wherever I was, but luckily I had my combat jacket which I quickly rolled the sleeves down to try and keep myself semi-warm. I let out a sigh and my cradling hand fell to my side where it brushed up against my filled holster.

“!” My hands tightened around the pearl grips which glowed slightly, the holy cross in the middle, despite being black, also glowing. I drew out the pistol. The words inscribed onto the sides glowing brightly as well. 'Thy lord shall set thee free' and 'Belladonna' glowing brightly in golden inscription.

It was so bright that I wouldn't even need my Eagle Eye to see the glow. I noticed the safety was on and quickly flipped it off before ejecting the magazine and finding it full of ammo. Slapping the mag back into the well I racked the slide but again gasped as a loaded cartridge was ejected. I quickly depressed the hammer and loaded the live shell back into the mag.

Why had they bothered to kidnap me yet leave me with means of escape? Did they want their plans to fail. Did they plan on me escaping as part of their plan? Goddess this was so confusing... maybe they left me with my equipment to confuse me...

“Fuck...” I swore quietly before taking a scan of the area. I was in... some sort of cavern... a... I wasn't sure yet. I stood up and let my body balance itself out, slowly walking along as to not upset my fragile equilibrium.

I kept my hand cannon up in front of me, held in both hands and ready for a fight. Though thoughts quickly ran through my head and I checked my waist belt. Although my handgun was here, the extra magazines were not. Meaning, since I had a full magazine plus one in the chamber, that gave me eight shots...

“Oh shit...” I muttered, realizing it wouldn't do me much good in a true conflict, especially with Kianna siding with... Chrysalis? I just didn't understand it. What the hell was she. Why disguise herself yet again. It just didn't make any sense.

As I continued along I found myself at a set of rail tracks. “A mine?!” I grunted. Looking one way, I saw it came to an abrupt stop at a dead end of the rail tracks... which meant if I followed the other way it should be my way out.

I wasn't sure what was going on, but by goddess I was gonna stop this plan... whatever it was.

I rushed along, staggering and losing my footing from time to time as I pushed my body to it's current limit. I was dazed from that... perfume or whatever that Chrysalis had been wearing or using or... whatever. Everything didn't make sense.

I staggered quickly up an ascending slope but stopped suddenly as the path just... dropped off. The wooden rail bridge across had crumbled long ago and now I was faced with an endless abyss... well, I'm sure the cavern below ended at some point but it was a long drop, seeing as how I couldn't see the bottom even with my Eagle Eye.

“Dammit.” I flopped down onto my back, facing the ceiling of the cavern. I flicked off the Eagle Eye, finding myself consumed into the darkness. My mind began to slip into unconsciousness as I lay upon the cold floor...

That small colt running along in the meadow. Giggling playfully. The older man behind him. Them laughing together. The colt riding on the man's shoulders... suddenly it got cold. My body shivered and I was brought before my grave stone. 'In loving memory of: Evan Burdick. 1995-2015. Dearly beloved and forever to be missed.' There was... barking... wait, barking? That was never...

“NGH!” I shot straight up, hearing a loud barking nearby. I flicked on the night-vision setting for the Eagle Eye and gasped as just a few feet away stood a Golden Retriever, barking my way. “UHH!” I gasped again, standing up in disbelief. What the hell was a dog doing down here?!

The dog ran a few feet away then turned back and barked again. Maybe... it was leading me out. Dammit, now I wish all dogs could talk like Lassie, then it would be so much easier to understand them... I had been spoiled the last few months.

My Desert Eagle drawn, I quickly followed the dog as it ran along, leading me deeper into the caverns of the old abandoned mine... or maybe it was leading me out? I continued his lead but came to a sudden halt as I nearly bumped into a changeling mass on the ground. It was a large one... “CHRYSALIS!” I snarled, drawing my handgun.

The dog growled ferociously. 'IT WAS A TRAP!' My conscious thought and I spun, figuring perhaps Kianna would sneak up again. There was no one there. I spun on my heels, my gun directed back at Chrysalis. The dog growled then whined at me, walking weakly over to the changeling and licking her gently.

The changeling let out a weak moan of despair. I... I didn't get it. What the hell was happening. First she was getting married to Blueblood, then she was brainwashing him with perfume or something, then she trapped me down in the caverns with my equipment but also trapped herself down here in a weak state and got a dog to lead me to her... was it all some absolutely absurd ploy?

“Who...” she whispered.

“Chr... Chrysie?” I asked in slight disbelief.

There was a pause before she rose her head weakly to look in my direction. “I... I can't see,” she whimpered. I quickly realized that without visual aid it was nearly pitch black down here. Surprisingly enough the dog didn't have trouble finding it's way around.

I holstered my handgun daringly then knelt down beside her, holding her hoof with my hand and bringing it to my face. She stroked it gingerly. I spoke out in wonder but also slight aggravation. “Why did you trap me down here?!”

“I didn't,” she said meekly, obviously barely able to even sit upright.

“You did! You sprayed Blueblood and me with that... that perfume that made us all woozy!” I reminded her but she just shook her head.

“That... was not my doing. Krystal... my... sister,” she said before laying down in a weakened state.

“Krystal?” I asked. My answer however didn't come. “Prove it,” I ordered, though not very harshly.

“No one knows what it's like... to be the bad... man...” she whispered softly. My heart dropped. It was her... the first song we had listened to... the first day I arrived to this world... everything flooded back into my mind.

“CHRYSIE! Are you okay?!” I gasped, cradling the changeling.

She lay in my arms weakly. “So... hungry. He catches mice and rats... so that he has energy... and I feed on whatever extra energy he can spare... days... weeks...” she whispered. I looked to the dog, realizing that he, remembering what Fluttershy had said about the gender of Chrysalis's dog, looked a little malnourished.

“Max... his name is Max...” she whispered to me. “Oh Maxy...” she whimpered. I held her close.

“Don't worry Chrysie. I'm gonna get you outta here!” I assured her but she shook her head against my chest.

“No... leave me. Take Max,” she said, the most selfless thing I had heard in a while.

“I'm not leaving you here!” I told her and she looked weakly up to me, her eyes seeming to sparkle.

“You would... for me?” she asked and I nodded, remembering about how changelings fed off love. I wasn't exactly on the idea of falling in love with her or anything that outlandish, but maybe a little affection could get her on her hooves.

She began to lean upwards, a hoof stroking my cheek. Her eyes fluttered shut and I decided to roll with it. I leaned down as well and pressed my lips to hers, my eye closing shut for a moment of passion with the queen.

I held the kiss, meaning for it only to be a peck but ended up holding it for much longer. I started to feel weak, tired and wobbly. The kiss continued and her hooves wrapped around my neck, pulling me in tighter.

I tried to gasp for air but couldn't manage as my energy seemed to be zapped out of me. In moments my world turned to darkness and again I was thrown into my dreams...

* * *

Third person perspective...

Zypher moved along at a brisk pace, patrolling his usual routes. He had reported to the queen her plans were well under way and she had made arrangements for the wedding to commence tomorrow. No pre-wedding rehearsals, no last minute changes, nothing.

The queen was right when she spoke of Shining's distrust in her, despite all her efforts to put him at ease. Continuing along, a voice called out to him. “Excuse me, sir?” asked the voice. Zypher turned, his body still disguised as the big lugging human male.

He found himself in the presence of a rather stunning mare. She had smooth dark gray hair and a light gray coat. Her eyes were a sparkling darker purple and the way she batted her eyes to him. “Yes ma'am, can I service you in anyway?” the doppelganger replied earnestly, playing the part of security chief.

“I would appreciate an escort to my room... well, more specifically I wouldn't mind someone with a bit of muscle to carry my cello. If you would please?” she asked. He gave a nod.

“Of course ma'am. It would be my pleasure,” he offered her his assistance to which the mare smiled.

“Well for that I thank you. The guards around here are so rude, not even replying to your request. Please, call me Tavi, my friends all do,” she introduced herself formally, holding out her hoof for the man to kiss.

He gave a gentle and most gentlemanly kiss to the mare's hoof before escorting her to her room, carrying along the rather light instrument. 'Hmm... maybe it's just because this guy's a little bigger and stronger...' Zypher thought to himself, figuring his mass may aid in the reason the cello was so light.

Arriving to her room she unlocked the door. “Where would you like it?” Zypher asked.

“Inside if you wouldn't mind,” Tavi said, putting more of a sexual tone to the innuendo. Zypher rolled his eye, having the other patched up to keep in accordance with the man's appearance. Walking inside he looked around and realized there wasn't much to the place. A washroom, a small kitchen area then there was the living room that had a bed and a small dining table.

“Small place...” he mentioned as he set the cello down in the corner of the living quarters.

“It's not much but it's all I need.” He heard her voice reply. Looking back over his shoulder he saw her hanging up her bow tie by the door. Needing to get back to his routes he turned to leave then when slack jawed as he nearly bumped into the mare in front of him.

She had her rump pointed in his direction, tail raised high to give him a clear view of what she had to offer. “Nghughh!” he gasped and Tavi merely giggled.

“Look up,” she said slyly. Zypher could barely break his stare away from her magnificent plot, only to be thrilled by the sight of a mistletoe above her. An equally sly smile splayed across his face. 'This guy... must be in heaven 24/7...' Zypher thought to himself as he went to go down on the mare.

He stopped suddenly as thoughts about Rarity streaked through his mind. He wasn't quite sure why but he couldn't bring himself to please the gorgeous mare in front of him. He just wanted...

“UGH! Dammit... I'm so sorry but I have to report asap to command...” Zypher appologized quickly before rushing off, leaving Octavia in a state of utter and complete shock. As the man shut the door behind himself she gave a very audible 'HUMPH!'

* * *

Evan's perspective...

I was being cradled gently in somepony's hooves. Rocked slowly to and fro. At first I though it was my mother, caring for me while I could not. “I'm so sorry,” whispered an apologetic voice. “I was so hungry... and you seemed so full of energy.”

I fluttered my eye open, to be basked in the sight of Chrysalis's face above me. Caring for me as I lay in a weakened state. My eye blinked in slow rhythm as we just stared at each other. “Why?” Chrysalis asked. My left hand rose to her cheek and stroked it.

Words needn't be said. Friendship went beyond most any boundary. “I'll... be alright. Don't worry about me... can you walk?” I asked, she nodded.

“I was going to ask the same,” she replied. I stood up with a groan, stretching out and taking a good look of the area with my Eagle Eye. “I can barely see,” she said, and a third voice spoke up.

“You don't need to,” said the overwhelmingly masculine voice. We turned and I was awestruck by the sight of my oldest friend I could remember. A dark black trench coat draped down to his knees, jet black pants and boots, black leather gloves and once again donned the holy cross shirt. His eye patch rod over his left eye much like mine. “Getting out is the easy part. Stopping everything is where the real danger lies,” he informed us.

An unlit Cuban cigar hung out of his mouth... MY ARNIE CIGAR! Dammit...

He waved me over and took hold of my custom F&F watch then scrolled through all the options before bringing up the maps. “If we escape through the sub levels of the castle we're going to get spotted easy. And I don't think we have much in terms of weaponry huh?” he asked, my head shaking.

“We'll get out through the bottom of the moutain... here,” he said, pressing a button, a route highlighting itself on the mini map of my Eagle Eye. “Now... take her hoof and lead the way,” Derreck ordered.

I grabbed Chrysalis's hoof. “What's going on?” she asked curiously.

“We're getting the hell outta Dodge,” I replied, leading her along and following my Eagle Eye's path that it marked out for us. I called back to Derreck as we rushed along. “What if the path is caved in?”

“We blow through it. Don't worry though, we'll get out without a hitch,” he assured us. Continuing along, Max followed briskly behind Chrysalis, ensuring his master would be safe. Hmm... and here I though dog was man's best friend.

This place was cold, freezing even... friggin mines. If I never had to see a mine again...

Derreck suddenly grabbed me from behind by my shoulder, his sudden tight grip nearly flipping me to the ground. “WAIT! HOLD UP!” He ordered us. I looked to him and he pointed up high. I looked and quickly folded back my Eagle Eye.

Up high in the caverns of the mine came a beam of light. “An opening...” I stated, trailing off. Derreck nodded. “Think we could get out?” I asked but he shook his head.

“Way too small for us. Besides, we don't have the equipment to sneak back into Canterlot...” trailing off, he looked to Max. “But he's just an everyday dog,” he stated, Max and Chrysalis looking to us curiously. “How clever is that dog?” he asked and Chrysalis immediately cut in to protest.

“Why?! What are you planning to do?! Don't take my Maxy from me!” she whined but I sat next to her.

“Chrysie... the moment anyone secretly working for... your sister,” I began, already forgetting Chrysalis's sister's name. “Sees us, they're gonna raise the alarm. They see an everyday dog... nothing suspicious.” I informed her.

She bit her lip. I could tell she didn't like this. Grabbing her dog and hugging him tightly, she shed a few tears before whispering to the dog to be careful. Derreck knelt next to the dog and began whispering, Max... somehow, from what I could see, understood Derreck.

The man lifted the dog into his arms then quickly ascended the cavern wall, helping the dog through the hole that lead outside. Sliding back down the wall, he skidded over to me. “Now hurry up and lead us out of here. We won't have much time!” Derreck ordered.

Rushing along, we descended down the miner tunnels for what felt like hours. I quickly noticed that Chrysie was starting to get gassed. Even despite my age I must've had great endurance... either that or she was still malnourished from the time she had spent down here without a proper food source.

“Come on, hop on my back. I'll carry you,” I offered. She looked to me with a shocked look, almost surprised I would help her in such a way. “Leave nopony behind, changelings included.” She hopped up onto my back and I found she was actually incredibly light... though again it might be due to her undernourishment.

We continued racing along and I got a strange feeling. “Derreck... how'd you find us?” I asked and he just shrugged.

“Instinct,” he replied and I rose a brow.

“So... you found me but need my Eagle Eye to find our way out?” I asked and he nodded.

“You stink. It was easy to smell you out even in the mazes that are these tunnels. Finding our way out is a different story.” I decided to take that as an answer and not bother asking anymore questions. It'd have to do for now.

Coming to a stop, we spotted a rail cart still mounted to the tracks. “Whatta yah think?” Derreck asked.

“Looks like three would be a tight fit,” I replied and he nodded.

“Anything to cut time. This the right path?” he asked. I scrolled through the map and shook my head.

“No, but it takes a Y and if we take the left path than it'll hook back up to our way out... the other way is unmapped,” I replied and Derreck nodded.

“Then... without further ado, all aboard the crazy train,” he chuckled. I helped Chrysie into the old rusty cart. Even so, after decades of neglect, it felt pretty sturdy and unlikely to just fall apart. Derreck began to push us along and pretty soon we picked up rapid speed and began a descent that felt more like a roller-coaster. Derreck leapt into the back and wrapped his hands around us. “Hold tight!” Derreck ordered, not like we had any other choice. We ended up picking up such speed that the Eagle Eye was starting to blur and distort its vision. I flicked off the night mode but kept monitoring the mini-map.

The cart shuttered and squealed under the speed, Chrysie squeaking in fear. I held her tight, whispering for her to do the same and assuring she'd be okay and that everything would turn out alright. Our corner started coming up fast. “We need to go left!” I yelled to Derreck.

“Hate to break it to you... no brakes...” he commented and I just groaned as we flew past the fork in the road at rapid speeds that made me wonder if the cart would simply flip over if we hit a corner.

“Shit!” I cried out. We continued speeding along, the mini-map mapping out the unknown as we traveled along. Up ahead in the distance of the tunnel I could see the dim illumination of light.

“THERE!” I yelled. “I SEE LIGH...” I trailed off as the Eagle Eye finished mapping out the tunnel. “DERRECK! IT'S A DEAD END!” I cried out, quickly realizing that this part of the mine must've never been completed, hence why it was never mapped out.

My eyes went wide as we reached the end of the rails, which simply dropped off the side of the mountain through an exit. The mining cart launched our bodies off the mountain several hundred feet about the ground. Time seemed to slow for me as our bodies separated from the mining cart. “Ohhh... shhhhhhiiiiiit...” Though I knew the words left my mouth, everything seemed to be silent.

I felt gravity grab me by the ankles and start dragging me towards the ground. My eyes went wide as I fell freely towards the ground. Just as all seemed lost a pair of forelegs swooped down underneath my armpits and hefted me back into the air. I gasped as everything exploded back into regular time.

I looked above myself, Chrysalis's wings extended out in a magnificent display. I hadn't noticed but I must've been out for quite a while earlier because it was early morning, the horizon just lighting up with a beautiful orange haze that was the dawn of morning.

The small amounts of light that did pierce over the horizon shone through Chrysie's wings. I looked down below and yelled out as I spotted Derreck plummeting towards the ground with the mining cart. “DERRECK!” My voice seemed to echo in a long distant scream.

The mining cart struck the ground and mysteriously erupted into a small mushroom cloud explosion. “DERRRRRRREECCCCCK!” I cried out, Chrysalis quickly flying down near the crash sight.

Fires continued to burn for whatever goddess forsaken reason. Why a mining cart would explode was beyond me but that wasn't the first thought on my mind. As Chrysie set me down I fell to my knees, looking to the burning wreck. “Ahhh... n-no... no it...” I trailed off in disbelief. He couldn't be dead. He just...

The flames whispered and waned slightly. A dark clad figure moved through the fires that raged on and slowly came into view. I watched in disbelief as Derreck walked forwards. “Oh... you're still alive... after a fall from way up there... and a mining cart that somehow exploded... without so much as even a scratch... or burn...” I brushed some soot off his leathery trench coat. “Just some soot on your shoulders.”

He flicked my hand away. “Are you gonna wonder about everything in this world that doesn't make sense? Like talking ponies with magic, alicorns that control the sun and moon cycle and talking dogs?” he asked. I didn't answer and he nodded. “Exactly. Now shut up and listen. Give me that Eagle Eye and F watch.” He grabbed the two items and began fidgeting with them. “If I can redial the power output, I can probably get the antenna of the Eagle Eye to relay a message to Flim and Flam and... oh, I uhh,” he looked to us. “This may take an hour or so, sooo...” he began fidgeting with the Eagle Eye.

“Why do we need Flim and Flam?” I asked, not exactly sure about how they could help us with everything that was happening. He looked to me.

“We need the Juggernaut...”

* * *

Third person perspective...

Lassie continued through the crowds in the streets, looking for Evan. She had seen him once or twice in the hallways of the castle but hardly ever since then. Her estrus was driving her nuts and she found herself rubbing up against street posts and business doorknobs to relieve herself, usually getting scolded by the owners or nearby pedestrians.

Lassie had a bottle thrown at her which smashed near her paws. “CALL THE POUND! THAT DOG IS RABBID!” A pony screamed out. Lassie cursed to herself. That was the bakery owner of whom she had pleasured herself with his door handle and thought to have left behind in the crowds.

Scurrying away and through some back alleys, she made her escape. Looking back over her shoulder she smiled, having once again lost a pursuer. She did however, with her lack of attention to what was in front of her, bump into someone else.

“GAH DRAT! Sorry I... woah!” she gasped, talking in the sight of a masculine dog. He barked in native dog language but Lassie put a paw on his mouth to silence him. “Nah, nah, dude. I got a problem that's way worse... and I think you'll want to help me with my problem first,” she said, not letting Max even begin to tell her the details of the dire situation.

Max tried to begin again but Lassie simply spun around and whisped her fluffy tail under his chin. The male dog seemed to flutter after her as she led him down the alley and away from the observation of other's.

The male dog's earlier intentions were lost as he was coaxed by the intoxicating smell of her needy pussy. Finding a more secluded spot. Lassie giggled as she looked to her enticed mate. The dog, much to her disappointment, immediately tried to mount her, but Lassie was quick to wrestle him to the ground. “Ah-ah-ahhh, not yet there. They say before any grand meal, an appetizer is suggested,” she informed him, placing her swollen pussy right in front of his face.

“Snack time, do a trick,” she told him and Max didn't need to be told twice. He immediately went to work on the female mate, his muzzle pressing right up against her sex, his tongue diving in for the main course. It only took Lassie seconds to scream out in orgasmic ecstasy.

“Woah... hooo... holy cow that was amazing... okay there buddy, time for the main course,” Lassie informed him, standing up and presenting her unclaimed pussy for him to take. “Make me your bitch, stud,” she told him. Max's canine penis was already erected from his sheath as he mounted Lassie and jerked several times in excitement, not bothering to properly line himself up.

“You mind-YEAAHHHHHH!” Lassie screamed as for the first time ever, she felt a full flesh and blood cock penetrate her, finally robbing her of her virginity that she had so long desperately tried to rid herself of. So excited and thrilled, she began to push her hips against Max's thrusts, quickly bringing herself into yet another orgasmic state. Max began to twitch and thrust wildly above her, driving his cock into Lassie with all the force he could muster, his knot stretching her wide and locking them together. Lassie's contracting pussy, along with the feel of his knot inside her, brought him into a joint orgasm between the two, his load dumping a generous amount of seed into her fertile depths.

“OHHHH GODDESS, YES! YESSSSSSS!” Lassie cried out. Several minutes past and Max finally came to his senses and barked hysterically, telling Lassie about everything he had meant to tell her earlier, whilst still mounted on her back.

“Woah-woah-woah-woah-WOAH! WHAT?!” Lassie gasped and Max repeated himself. “Chrysalis isn't the real Chrysalis, and the real Chrysalis is stuck in the mine.” Max barked. “And she's stuck down in the abandoned mine shafts along with a guy she used to know?!” Max barked again. “AND SOMETHING HORRIBLE IS GONNA HAPPEN UNLESS WE WARN SOMEONE WHO CAN STOP IT?!” Max nodded. “Well why didn't you tell me earlier, yah dope?!” Lassie gasped.

Max grumbled to himself and Lassie held a paw to her chest innocently. “What?! It was hardly on me. You're the one that let his urges get the better of him... bah, forget it! We must make haste!” Lassie chimed, standing upright and going to make a dash for the castle but tripping and crashing to the ground as she was held in place by Max's knot.

“HEY!” Lassie gasped then grunted. “GURRR... OF ALL TIMES!” She yelled out. “Come on, we gotta hurry!” she ordered. Max and Lassie tried to work together but were so uncoordinated they ended up just crashing into trash cans and dumpsters, never leaving the back alley...

* * *

Krystal overlooked the city from the balcony of her room, smiling contently. “Soon... it will be mine, all mine,” she chuckled to herself. Kianna and her squad mates stood idle in the room, awaiting her new orders. The wedding was to commence within the hour.

Turning back and entering the room, she was accompanied by the doppelganger of the big man. “Well Kianna... it would seem that...” she trailed off and the woman rose a brow. “My usefulness for you has come to an end,” she stated and Kianna gasped.

“YOU SAID-” Krystal was quick to cut her short.

“I offered you freedom in the new world, yes. And I plan on keeping good on my promise. But it would seem that your further presence upsets that imbecile Shining Armor. So, as the soon to be ruler of Equestria, I am requesting that you see yourself out of Canterlot before the wedding commences.” She turned to attend to other things but Kianna stood in her way.

“The payment... seeing as how we're officially done,” Kianna ordered but Krystal just laughed.

“Oh silly girl... in the new Equestria there will be no currency. Only love and copulation,” she noted and Kianna's lips curled as she quickly drew her .44 magnum revolver.

“WE HAD A DEAL!” She roared and Zypher was quick to draw his pistol as well. Krystal laughed and let out a whistle, guards storming into the room. “She's not the real Chrysalis! She's an impostor!” Kianna warned the guards, only making Krystal laugh even more. The guards all flickered briefly, revealing their true, changeling, forms.

Spears and swords were pointed in their direction as Krystal spoke. “I suggest that you take me up on my offer... before you lose your freedom that I have granted you, moreover your life,” she cackled.

Kianna's sniper leaned over. “We're seriously outnumbered here Ki... there'll be another time,” he suggested. Kianna regretfully holstered her revolver and snarled at the soon to be defacto ruler.

“I won't forget this... and you haven't seen the last of me.” She scowled before storming off with the rest of her crew. Krystal laughed and looked to herself in the mirror, mimicking her sister's appearance before snugging a rose above her ear. “This day is going to be perfect...”

* * *

Evan's perspective...

Juggernaut arrived at our position, where Derreck yanked open the rear hatch door. “Get in!” he ordered. We didn't need to be asked twice, quickly hopping in. “Juggernaut. Canterlot, on the double!” he orderd vocally, the truck's auto-pilot kicking in and speeding us top speed up the mountainside and towards the massive capital city.

Derreck reached under one of the bench seats of the back and retrieved a black rifle that made my jaw drop. “W-w-where'd you get dat?!” I gasped, my words slurring slightly. He held the AN-94 assault rifle and racked on the bolt, chambering a round before stuffing a few extra mags into the pockets of his trench coat.

“From a friend... but even still. We should try to get in undetected for the most part.” He slung the rifle across his back and pulled out an object that just made me groan from the idea of it...

* * *

Third person perspective...

The doors to the ceremonial room swung open, Chrysalis trotting down the aisle, with the doppelganger Burdy being the escort of the bride. Blueblood stood idly by with Cadance as his best mare, having accepted the offer of the part.

Shining and his guards stood lively, now the sole security of the royal wedding. Chrysalis arrived at the wedding altar and took her place by her fiance's side. Celestia asked the crowd to be seated as she began the ceremony...

Lassie struggled and squirmed. “Celestia... that's like the third time you've cum in me. Can't you just go soft already?” she chirped, Max just grumbling a doggy grumble. “Ugh! Figures I get stuck with the one dog who... who...” she trailed off as she watched an overly large cardboard box shuffle past. “Uhhh... !” she gasped, jerking and popping Max's knot out of her dripping cunt. Lassie nearly doubled over in shock from the feel of the emptiness inside of her, but had no time to dwell on it now.

Rushing out to the street where she saw it pass, she noticed it heading into a small time pub. There were three guards standing nearby that quickly transformed into changelings and chased in after the box. Lassie swore to herself, quickly trying to think up a plan to save the box occupants...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

We arrived into the mostly deserted pub, only finding a bartender on duty. Despite Derreck's constant talk about being on a tight schedule, he demanded that we stop to get a drink first. Walking over to the bartender, he asked where everypony was, getting the reply that most of the city was attending the royal wedding.

Suddenly the bartender gasped then rushed away. Derreck peered over the counter then just shrugged, pouring himself a mug of booze from the taps along with three ice cubes. I turned, along with Chrysie and gasped as three changelings held swords in our direction.

I was about to go for Belladonna but realized she was no longer in her holster. “!”

Derreck casually mingled over to a free table nearby and whistled for us to join him, apparently in no concern over the armed changelings. Chrysie and I slowly walked over to the table, sitting beside Derreck as the changeling warriors stood across from us.

“HA! We got you now! The queen will be so proud of us,” the middle one said. Derreck took a look at his mug of alcohol and swished it around, the ice-cubes tinking inside the glass mug. “Now... we don't want a fuss... come quietly, and there won't be trouble. But try anything, and we will kill you,” the middle one spoke, frightening Chrysie even more. I just swallowed as Derreck took a sip of the beverage and looked to them with a risen brow, leaning to one side.

'Was he already drunk?'

The changelings followed him with their weapons but he just chuckled lively and took another sip. “What's so funny?!” the middle one spoke again. Derreck just chuckled again, this time a little more insultingly. "What's yer name?" Derreck asked.

A second changeling spoke. "Kill him!" He ordered, Derreck rising a brow.

"Oooo," Derreck replied in a semi-shocked way. The middle stallion swung his sword to deliver a blow with the hilt but Derreck casually caught his wrist, stopping the strike early.

Another cocked his sword back. “LET-GO-OF-THE-SWORD!” the other ordered sternly. Derreck looked to them before shoving the middle one back, nearly toppling over all three of the changelings. I didn't get it. Why was he so casual about all this. Was there something he knew that we didn't?

Derreck looked with an inquisitive look to the middle stallion. “So...” he trailed off, giving him a once over. “You're obviously the dick...” he commented, making the three changelings look towards one another before back to Derreck.

“And the ones on each side of you are your balls.” Derreck rose his eyebrows with a smile. “You see... there are two types of balls... big brave balls... and mincey little faggoty balls. You see, dicks have drive and clarity of vision, but without their balls their not much use and aren't too intimidating. Whereas balls need a dick to lead them. Without the other, dicks and balls are useless,” he commented and the third changeling spoke up.

“These could be your last words! So choose them wisely!”

Derreck smiled as he continued his speech. “But you see... even when dicks and balls are together... they're still not very clever... they smell pussy, they come running for a piece of the action... and here you all though you smelt some good o' pussy... stuck it right in without even thinking,” he said, the changelings, along with Chrysie and myself, terribly confused.

“But you've got it all wrong... there ain't no pussy here... just a toaster that's been turned on... making you wish you were born a female,” he said, the changelings now looking to him with a slight sense of fear from his tone of voice.

“Now... like any prick with a set of balls... you have this sinking feeling inside your gut... you almost wish it was all just a dream, nearly crying out as you try to feverishly go soft and get yourself out of this predicament...” Derreck trailed off to take another sip of his booze. “Now that you finally realized the dangers of this predicament you're starting to shrink... and your little mincey faggoty balls are shrinking with you...” he stated.

The changelings all gulped. I would've been petrified of his tone of voice too, but I couldn't understand what had him so cocky and sure of himself. “The fact that your queen can't supplement her entire army with weapons on the day of invasion makes me laugh... but what makes me laugh harder is the fact you've got replica written down the sides of your toy swords...” We all looked.

REPLICA

Derreck reached into his coat and slowly set Belladonna down on the table. “And I got Desert Eagle... point five-oh... written on the side of mine...” we all looked to Belladonna.

DESERT EAGLE .50AE

“Should precipitate you... into going flaccid, along with you little faggoty balls,” Derreck commented as he took another sip of his booze. “Now... fuck off!” he hissed at them. They quickly zoomed off at a speed that could challenge even Dash.

“HIYAHHHH!” Yelled a voice just seconds after the changelings had left. Lassie smashed through a window in a spectacular show of acrobatics, landing in a defensive pose with a makeshift club. “Wait... what? You got rid of them yourselves?...” she mentioned looking to Chrysalis. “So is she... the real Chrysalis?” she asked, Max rushing in with a happy bark and jumping up to Chrysalis.

“I'll take that as a yes... aww, as if you guys got rid of them yourselves...”

* * *

Third person perspective...

“And do you, Chrysalis, take Blueblood to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?” Celestia recited.

Chrysalis opened her mouth. “I...” she trailed off, holding the entire audience in suspense. “Well, actually... I have a grave confession to make to all of you... Evan?” she asked, the man quickly drawing his pistol on the regal princess, much to everypony's sudden shock.

“Don't even try it princess!” the man shouted, seeing her horn starting to glow. “Any sligth movement and this puppy goes off... and bye-bye princess of the sun!” His voice was deep and demanding.

Shining yelled out. “GUARDS! ARREST HIM!” Shining yelled but not a single one moved. “GUARDS!” he yelled but Chrysalis just laughed, reverting to her true form of Krystal.

“Bwahahahaha! Surprised Shining?” she cackled as the entire royal guard turned into changelings, turning their weapons to the public and element bearers. Even some of the ponies in the crowd turned to changelings.

Throughout the city ponies changed into changeling form. Back at the castle, Celestia scowled, afraid for her subject's well being. “YOU CAN'T GET AWAY WITH THIS!” Celestia boomed in her regal voice but Krystal just laughed.

“Ohh but I already have. You see Celestia... my sister was such a fool, rising suspicion by taking the form of a royal princess before he wedding. Instead, I locked my sister away beforehand, then seduced Blueblood with the promise of power and authority... and a little pheromones. Who would really think somepony would disguise themselves as a changeling?” she laughed then turned to her most elite guard. “Restrain her, along with the element bearers... and find the other one. The night one!” she ordered.

The mass amounts of changelings swarmed over the ponies, capturing them and quickly seizing control over the city. Twilight wept out to the doppelganger, still believing it was her beloved, seeing as how every changeling had transformed so far. “Evan... what are you doing?” she cried out and the man just shrugged.

“I serve Equestria, and it's ruler, regardless of who it is,” he stated then turned to Krystal. “Ma'am... Kianna's group has been spotted in the city...” he trailed off and awaited her orders. Being the second in command, he had mental telepathy with other changeling warriors.

“She's of no use to us now... and may prove problematic in the future. Dispose of them,” Krystal ordered, Zypher nodding and giving the order through telepathically...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

There was a sudden eruption that made Chrysie, Lassie, Max and myself jump in shock. It was followed by two more explosions and an eruption of gunfire. Another explosion rocked the ground beneath us. “Oh shit...” Derreck muttered.

“What? What's going on?” I asked and he turned to the others. "Stay here. Burdy, with me,” he said, taking grasp of my hand cannon. There was yelling and screaming, followed by more gunshots and an explosion. Derreck rushed up to the corner of a building then spun out, Desert Eagle ready.

We both gasped as we saw the sight before us. There, under a pile of rubble, lay Kianna's sniper, struggling painfully to free himself. Derreck and I rushed over, the stallion fretting as he saw us rush over.

The stallion grabbed for his grenade but Derreck yanked it free from his grip, accidentally pulling the pin in the process. Tossing it far away, Derreck turned his attention back to the stallion. “Relax!” he ordered then pulled my Eagle Eye off and spoke into the headset piece. “Juggernaut, to me!” he ordered. Moments later the battle truck came screeching around the corner.

Derreck gripped on some of the larger rubble and began tossing it off. I heard a set off hooves landing on the ground, along with the wisping of a long blade. “SENKA! Wait!” the stallion coughed. The ninja stopped and hesitated, letting Derreck finish freeing the stallion.

“GAH! My legs... I can't feel my legs!” the stallion yelped. Derreck hefted him up and cracked open the hatch on Juggernaut. The ninja moved briskly and hopped in as well. “Gah... wait! We can't go. We gotta get Kianna... she headed back... the castle... Krystal!” he gasped in pain.

Derreck looked to the ninja. “Keep him safe... find the others and get them to safety as well,” he ordered but the sniper held his hoof on Derreck's shoulder to stop him from going.

“Get Kianna... don't... let anything... happen to her...” he grunted. The two looked to each other for a long while and gave each other a nod.

“I see you, sniper,” Derreck said.

“Dwayne... it's Dwayne...” the stallion replied. Derreck rose a brow.

“Dwayne? Odd name for a pony,” he stated but the stallion just smiled.

“It means dark one... I kinda liked the sound of it,” he replied.

“Parker... Derreck Parker,” my big friend stated before slamming the door and banging on it twice. “Juggernaut, search and rescue!” he ordered, the truck squealing off.

“Shit Derreck! We shoulda sent Chrysie with them!” I told him but he shook his head.

“We need her to retake the changelings! It may be the only way!” He told me before whistling for Lassie, the other regrouping with us. We all rushed to the castle, constantly having to take back alleys to avoid conflict. Derreck holstered my handgun and drew out his AN-94, having it at the ready in case things went further south than they already had...

* * *

Third person...

The queen inspected the prisoners, proud with her achievement. “Indeed... I would say a perfect success, wouldn't you Evan?” Krystal asked and the doppelganger nodded, continuing his inspections of the prisoners.

As he neared the element bearers, Rarity called out. “How could you? After everything... you just... went cold. I would've never thought you to be this kind of pony!” Rarity wept. Her words tugged at his heartstrings and made him swallow hard.

“Something wrong?” Krystal asked, shocking Zypher for just a moment.

“No ma'am. Just giving them a false sense of hope... it crushes them even harder in the end,” he laughed darkly, the queen adding into the laughter...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

We charged through the hallways, Derreck rushing unsuspecting changeling drones and knocking them clean out in a silent manner. Rushing around another corner, we spotted four changelings sneaking into a bedroom. Derreck slung his rifle across his chest, drawing out Belladonna and charging forwards.

Taking the corner hard, he slid into the bed chambers, doing a professional roll. Four shots went off within a second and a half, all four changelings falling and Princess Luna springing up from her deep slumber.

Still dreary, she looked around in pure horror, four dead bodies by her bedside. Derreck grabbed her hoof. “Come on princess, no time to explain!” he ordered, rushing us all down towards the ceremony room.

Reaching the ceremony door, he kicked them open, firing three shots into the ceiling while yelling out. “I OBJECT!” Everyone looked to him as he drew the Desert Eagle then stopped. “Dammit... as if I'm late...” he swore, realizing that everyone already realized what was going on, and was even captured. “Alright... in that case... FREEZE! THAT'S AN ORDER!” He boomed. The entire room buzzed with angry changelings. “Chrysalis, do your...” he trailed off and looked over his shoulder, only seeing Lassie, Luna and myself. “Chrysalis?... Chrysalis?... shit!” he swore, turning back to the baddies and motioning them to wait just a moment.

Rushing back out to the halls, he spotted Max just outside the doors barking at the floor, and Chrysalis hanging from a chandelier. “CHRYSALIS!” He yelled but she just whimpered.

“There's a spider! I'm terrified of spiders!” she nearly wept. Derreck let out a grunt then rushed forwards and stomped on the little creature several times. “Now... if you don't mind there's a task at hand more serious than a phobia of spiders!” he told her. Chrysalis fluttered down and followed Derreck back into the ceremonial chamber.

“This is the real Chrysalis!” he informed everyone, though they probably already knew that. The sister, whom had taken her stink beetle-esque form once more, simply laughed.

“Oh please. Why would they follow her lead? I've brought them to a power that she could never hope to bring them to. Why in Equestria would they follow her lead again?” she cackled. Drawing Belladonna, Derreck fired the final shot.

The sonic boom was deafening as the bullet traveled to super-sonic speeds. There was suddenly a green sparking electrical storm around the queen that fizzled out the bullet, the slug dropping just inches from her hooves.

The slide on Belladonna was locked back, signaling she was empty. Derreck went ot draw his AN-94 but a strike of green energy blasted us both back. Luna charged forwards but met a similar fate. The blast didn't hurt so much as knock the wind right out of me. I tried gasping for breath but could barely manage.

Lassie rushed to our sides just as Chrysalis flew over head. “ENOUGH OF THIS, SISTER!” She boomed, dodging blast after blast as she flew towards her sister. Chrysalis fired back but the other changeling ruler simply turned her back to Chrysie, her blast being deflected by those damn shield like wings on her back. Chrysie was taken off guard by her own deflected blast that knocked her to the ground.

Krystal looked to the second me. “Finish her off!” she ordered just as Max was charging forwards. I watched in horror as Max snarled valiantly and leapt at the queen, only to have himself impaled on her jagged horn and tossed to the side.

I gasped as I tried painfully to get up, Derreck crawling to Luna's side. I watched as the other me leveled a handgun on Chrysie. 'No... no... NO!' My thoughts boomed in my head. I heard Rarity say something to him that made him deter.

“You wouldn't... you're not truly that heartless... I guess... I guess I had you all wrong,” she wept. It seemed to have a drastic effect on the man as he turned his aim to Krystal.

“FREEZE YOUR HIGHNESS!” he yelled and she looked to him with a semi-surprised face.

“You know Zypher... it shocks me so... not that you would betray me... but that you would still address me as your ruler.” She took a step forwards.

“Not one move. You know as well as I do that...” He staggered back, flinching, grunting and wincing in pain, quickly dropping his gun to the floor as he had a complete body spasm.

“You forget Zypher, that you're not the only one with telekinesis over other changelings. You have forgotten your place... by siding with these... pitiful beings... you have... betrayed me. And for that, I must destroy you!” she said, levitating the handgun on it's previous owner. I clenched my eyes shut as the gunshot went off, followed by several screams.

Opening my eyes, I saw her make her way towards Chrysie. I needed to make a move. Belladonna was empty. Derreck's AN-94 was slid across the floor. “YOU FIGHT LIKE A COWARD KRYSTAL!” Yelled a voice from above. Looking up to the balcony level, I saw Kianna walking along in a plain tank top with just regular cargo pants. No battle fatigues. No armor. No tactical vest... just tank top with cargo pants and boots on her feet.

“Ahhhh! Kianna!” Krystal called back. “I seem to be in need of a second in command. What do you say?” Krystal offered but the woman just growled.

“I say I'd rather die than serve a treacherous scum like you!” she yelled. Krystal's smile turned to a frown.

“Then so be it!” she yelled, firing a blast of green energy at the woman. Kianna's right hand moved like lightning, drawing out her revolver and firing it in rapid succession. The green energy blast was miraculously dispersed by the six .44 magnum slugs, said projectiles falling harmlessly to the ground.

Krystal looked in awe as the woman spun the revolver in a classic western fashion. “BURDY!” she yelled down, holstering her revolver. I staggered to my feet, Belladonna now in my possession but empty at the moment.

Closing her pinkie and ring finger, then holding her middle and index fingers to her temples with both hands, she quickly pointed to me. “You're pretty good... but everyone needs help at some point!” She pulled out what looked like a small brick of metal that would fit in one's hand. “CATCH!” she called out, tossing it down.

It only took me a second to realize what it was. My left hand reached out, my right hand tilting the Belladonna. Grabbing the filled magazine mid-flight, I slammed it into the well of the pistol, thumbing the slide release and locking my aim on Krystal.

I felt... as though there was a hand resting on my shoulder. 'Time to prove yourself to your friends... show your patriotism!' my conscious spoke. I let out a horrifying roar that was on the more animalistic side of nature. I felt my whole body trembled from the roar.

Belladonna was squeezed tightly in my hands, her frame, custom pearl grips and inscriptions all shining brightly. 'Thy lord... shall set thee free!'

My trigger finger squeezed back. The gun rocked in my hands, a massive ball of fiery energy erupting out the muzzle of the gun as the bullet immediately reached sonic speeds. Unlike ever before, the sonic flash seemed to have a... rainbow color to it.

Krystal's electric shield was up once more but this time it did her no good. The bullet seemed to be... mystical... as though enchanted by my very state of anger. The bullet passed through her defenses unaffected and blew a hole straight through her.

There was a long pause as everything sat still and silent. Krystal suddenly staggered, a stream of blood running down her body and forming a puddle on the floor. “What... but... how?” she wheezed before collapsing on the floor in a lifeless heap.

The changelings all looked in shock, which soon turned to anger. Derreck's voice yelled out. “LUNA, THE SPIDERS!” He boomed. Luna's horn lit up, spiders swarming into the room from almost nowhere. The changelings all shrieked in fear and huddled together, being herded by Luna's swarm.

Chrysie and I rushed over to Max who was stuttering for breath. “No... no... please, Maxy... my little Maxy... no!” she wailed out, holding her dying companion in her forelegs. With his last bits of strength, the dog reached up with his muzzle and licked her a few last times before resting into her body and passing away.

Derreck let off a burst into the ceiling with his AN-94 to catch everyone's attention. “ALRIGHT LISTEN UP!...”

* * *

Hours had passed and we were herding the remnants of the changeling army away. Kianna and Derreck had simply disappeared from the scene, almost as if they vanished. I walked over to Rarity who wept profusely as a body bag with that one changeling was zipped up. The one who had defied Krystal. “Who was he?” I asked but she just shook her head and pulled me into a hug.

“I'm not sure... but he... he...” she continued to cry. I just patted her back. I looked to all the shocked and traumatized ponies... so this... this was the darker side of Equestria. Rarity let go of the hug and moved towards the other element bearers. I moved over to Chrysalis, whom hadn't moved the whole time since we started ushering the changelings away.

“He... he was all I had... and he just...” Chrysalis wept over her deceased canine companion whom had defended her with his life. Lassie reached my side.

“I know a place we can bury him... a place he'd probably like...” she commented. Chrysalis didn't really answer.

“I'll lead them away... somewhere where they'll never cause trouble again...” she whispered. I left my hand resting on her shoulder.

“It's not your fault... you don't have to exile yourself because of this. I... have a place you can stay,” I offered. Her head still hung low. There was a frantic voice that caught my attention.

“Aunt Celestia! Aunt Celestia what in Equestria happened?” asked 004. I turned to look, seeing Celestia and Luna close by, along with the groom to be.

“It's... a long story,” Celestia replied, all of us understanding that he had most likely underwent memory loss when under the effects of Krystal's pheromones.

“Well I demand to know! My room is a mess!” he commented, quite disrespectfully considering some ponies had went through serious trauma and he was complaining about the state of his room. Celestia groaned, already sick of his ignorance. I could see that his outburst had caught the attention of a few others as well.

“Well...” Celestia began then looked to Chrysalis and I. “If you must know, you were to be married to the queen over there.” 004 looked our way, quickly growing a disgusted look on his face from the sight of Chrysalis.

“UGH! I would never marry such a hideous creature. To think that-” I cut him off, his hurtful words taking further impact on the already distraught Chrysalis.

“Hey Blueblood!” I snapped, grabbing his attention. I swung the hardest punch I could muster straight across his jaw, knocking him flat and hopefully dislocating his jaw. “She's beautiful... and a lot more pretty than you'll ever dream of being...” I snarled then looked to Celestia whom had a rather shocked look on her face.

“Sorry... I uhh... he's an asshole...” I stated but Luna pitched in.

“Don't worry. He's our great, great, great, great, great, great, several times removed grand nephew.” She gave me a smile which I returned before returning to Chrysie's side.

“Chrysie...” I trailed off, a tear coming to my eye. “No one knows what it's like... to be the bad man... to be the sad man...”

“Behind blue eyes...” she finished. I reached my hand down for her to take before speaking out to her, letting her know I'd be there for her.

“Everyone deserves a second chance...”

Author's Note

When I first was editing this it was my birthday. I was planning on getting it out on my birthday (Which was the 12th), or the day before, that way I could spend the day dicking around with my new pea-shooter but... well, I spent the day figuring out this chapter. Still gotta think ahead, you know with Kianna's crew and what's gonna happen to Burdy and... I won't spoil it.
Cheers,
Ps: I still did get to have a little bit of fun on my birthday, see?

Chapter 58

'Foal sitting...'

Friday, August 22nd, 2014...

Cadance's door rest ajar. My seat was rolled and tilted all the way back. My feet were kicked up and resting on the crevice where the door met the cab of the truck. The spurs on my cowboy boots gleamed in the afternoon sun.

It wasn't necessarily a scorcher today, but it was on the hot side of things. I had on and old shirt that I had cut the sleeves off of, effectively turning it into a tank top. My cowboy hat was tilted low to shield my face from the basking sun.

Chrysalis had left shortly after the never-to-be wedding. She said she would return after she ensured her hive would never return to threaten the well being of Equestria. Lassie on the other hand... turned out to be pregnant. It had stifled her sexual prowess slightly but she was still the horny pooch she always was.

A quiet spaghetti western theme played from my radio which I had turned low so that I could soothe myself into something of a catnap. I heard the clopping of hooves approaching and used my index finger to flip my hat upwards to see whom my visitor was.

“Howdy pardner,” Applejack greeted and I took off my hat and nodded.

“Howdy.” I stroked my left hand across my short brown hair that was a few inches in length.

“Ah uhh... don't suppose yer up teh much are yah?” she asked and I merely shook my head.

“Just relaxing. Dash says these next few weeks are gonna be the last warm ones before it gets cold. Gotta enjoy it well it lasts, right?” I replied with a rhetorical question.

“Well... uhm... what's say you about foal-sittin' fer Dash, Rarity and muhself?” she asked and I rose a brow.

“Foal what?” I asked.

“Yah know... watchin' over our sisters. Celestia has requested our company out of country. Somethin' bout needin' the Elements a Harmony. Big Mac an Granny Smith are outta town. Reckon Applebloom could watch herself but when her and the others get together... they get a little adventurous. Wouldn't mind a more mature eye watchin' over them,” she informed me and I just chuckled.

“Oh gee, thanks,” I scoffed and she looked startled. I pointed to my only good eye. “Want a mature eye... cause I only have one. Way tah discriminate against my handicap,” I joked.

“Ah didn't-” she began apologetically but I cut her off with a laugh.

“I'm just kidding AJ, I'm kidding. Relax. Sure, I wouldn't mind watching over your sisters,” I stated and she let out a relieved sigh.

“Phew. We all found somepony teh watch our pets but couldn't find a foal-sitter in town. Yer a life-saver!” she thanked me and I shook her hoof.

“No problem man... er, mare.” I replied, putting my hat back over my head but not getting the chance to lay back down, as Twilight came rushing out with some loaded saddle bags on her sides, stuffed with what appeared to be scrolls.

“Evan! Can you watch Spike while I'm gone?! I know it's sudden but-” I cut her off by putting a finger to my mouth, indicating to be silent.

“Sssh, it's the good part,” I said, motioning to the song as it hit it's climax and choir. The Ecstasy of Gold had something... that thing... that magic, that made you feel so many feelings all at once. There was no true way of explaining it other than a true masterpiece. I paused the CD and looked to my mother. “Okay, what were you sayin?” I asked.

“Oh uh, Celestia has requested the Elements of Harmony right away. Can you watch Spike while I'm gone?” she asked and I nodded. “Thanks.” She hopped up and gave me a peck on the cheek before turning to Applejack. “We better go, it sounds important.”

Applejack turned to me. “Oh, the fillies are all at the farm. Iffen yah want teh head over there now, that'd be great. Help yerself tah whatever yah need there,” AJ told me and I gave them both a nod. “You uhh... think yah can handle it?” she asked and I brushed it off like it was nothing.

“Bah, they're great kids. How hard can it be?” I asked and both her and Twilight looked to each other then back to me. “Uhm...” I trailed off and Applejack just rested a hoof on my lap.

“Yah'll do great. Ah can just tell... but uhh, we gotta split.” With that her and Twilight rushed off, probably to meet up with the others at the train station. I licked my teeth and clucked my tongue.

'Indeed...' I thought to myself silently. Sitting up and stepping out of the truck, I figured I should probably take Spike with me to the farm, rather than try to jump back and forth between watching him and the fillies.

Walking into the home, I saw Lassie and Spike horsing around, immediately stopping as I walked in. I stood in the doorway, Lassie and Spike tangled together and obviously having been wrestling over something.

“Uhm... ahem... I uhh... I'm supposed to uhh... watch you guys for a few days...” I trailed off with a blink, unsure exactly how I was supposed to act. Lassie pulled a fast one and slipped the object away from Spike's claws.

“HA! AND THE CROWD GOES WILD, AHHHHHHH!” Lassie cheered. I rose a brow and she coughed, tossing the... remote I guess, aside. “Uhh... yeah, you were saying?” she politely replied.

“Uhm... well, I'm gonna watch Apple Bloom too... so uhh... if you guys pack up some stuff, then I can watch you all over there,” I offered. Spike and Lassie looked to each other then squealed like a couple of kids.

“SLUMBER PARTY!” they both cheered before rushing off, presumably to get their things together. I walked down to my room and tossed aside my tank top, dawning a dark brown shirt and the gifted vest from Braeburn instead. I tossed my duster coat on top and rolled up the sleeves.

I grabbed my wallet, jammed full of bits. I hadn't really splurged on much in a long time so I still had quite a bit of cash left over from my endeavor with Daring Do. Just as I was thinking to myself, I spotted the large picture. I smiled as I gently picked it up to admire. It was the picture Applebloom, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle drew me. The one they gave me for my birthday. I'd always cherish it. Setting it back down, I closed my dresser once again and decided I wouldn't need much.

Stuffing the wallet into the pocket of my duster, I headed upstairs, where Lassie and Spike were still scurrying about, packing things into duffle bags. I stepped outside, immediately feeling the increase in temperature, along with the heated confinement of my heavy set of clothes.

I closed my eye and took a deep inhale, letting everything soak in. Sometimes I felt like I was young again, sprite and adventurous like nothing could ever stop me. Then other days I really felt my age, so to speak. Sore backs, stiff joints and trouble sleeping at times. Age, despite my actual age in years, had really gotten to me.

I let out a sigh, wondering to myself. What if the world ever depended upon me again? Like in Baltimare, or Canterlot... and I couldn't perform due to my age hindrance? I felt my esteem lower, and with it I felt pretty crummy. “Ugh...” I let out a grunt, shaking my head in distress. Even so despite our equal amount of injuries and endeavors, or perhaps more so on his part, Derreck looked in his prime years, like it hadn't hit him at all.

“WOAH, LOOK OUT!” Screamed a voice from above. I looked up and spotted a grey blur shooting down towards me. Time was put to a stand still as my jaw dropped. I moved fast and braced myself as I did my best to catch the speeding blur.

The impact was brutal and rattled my entire body, also shaking my world out of slow motion. I found myself still standing, a fume of sandy dust shrouding our bodies as I stood there with Derpy in my arms.

The dust settled and I managed to open an eye, seeing the still shuddering pegasus in my arms. “Well... hello to you too, Derpy,” I greeted and her head perked up, realizing she hadn't impacted with the hard unforgiving ground below.

“EVAN! Thank you SOOO much! You're a hero!” she cheered, quickly giving me a peck on the check before fluttering out of my arms and onto the ground. I felt my psyche recovering, a smile coming across my face. At least some ponies could still rely on me.

“No problem Derpy,” I said with a bright smile. Spike and Lassie came zooming out of the library, closing the door behind them with Lassie putting up the closed sign. She looked to us then rose a brow.

“Is Derpy coming too?” she asked and I shook my head, then realized that was terribly rude of me.

“I uhh... oh, uhm... hey Derpy, wanna hang out for a while. I'm watching over a few fillies,” I offered and Derpy's wings sprang out.

“ABSOLUTELY!” she said excitedly, quickly calming down and stroking her front left hoof around the dirt in circles. “I mean... if you'd like,” she said, a little bit more timid than her outburst of excitement.

I gave her a pat on the head. “Of course. You're one of my best friends. How could I say no?” I asked rhetorically. I motioned for Lassie and Spike to hop in the vehicle as I stepped into the driver side. Spike hopped up into the back bench seat along with Lassie, whom pulled the passenger seat back for Derpy.

Derpy fluttered in and quickly found a comfortable way to sit as I reached across and shut the door for her. Lassie piped up from the backseat. “Awww... I wanted shotgun,” she complained before raising the center console and hopping into the middle seat. She quickly lathered my face with sloppy dog kisses to which I just laughed.

“Ahh, ack, okay Lassie... hee-hee...” I playfully pushed her away and keyed the ignition. “And how are you Cadance?” I asked the truck as it rumbled its iconic chug. “Yes indeed,” I responded as I pulled away and headed towards the Apple Farm.

Lassie leaned over the middle seat and looked back to Spike. “So whatta yah think we'll do first? Hide and seek?” she asked, already super excited. I used the master controls on the driver door to roll down the windows, leaning my left arm on the window as we cruised along.

Derpy leaned her head out the window, mouth open and tongue slobbering out the side of her mouth just like a dog. I just smirked and looked out to the scenery as Cadance chugged along.

Despite the rather smooth gravel path to the Apple Farm, Cadance still rode like an old hay wagon, every bump bouncing the entire truck due to the stiff suspension designed specifically for towing and hauling heavy loads, less so for cruising.

Pulling up to the farm, I parked Cadance by the barn, shutting her down for the time being. We all stepped out and I did a quick look around, figuring the fillies would be inside. I walked over to the home and gave a brief knock before entering, Lassie, Spike, and Derpy following me inside. “Hello... girls? Apple Bloom?” I asked as I peered inside. Walking into the living room, I told Lassie and Spike they could drop their stuff off here.

Spike and Lassie called out too but we got no immediate response. I rose a brow and I instructed everyone to search a different part of the house. I went upstairs and went room to room, but alas found nothing. Coming back downstairs, I found the others already waiting for me. “Nothin'. You guys find anything?” I asked but they all shook their heads. “Huh...” I trailed off and Lassie spoke up.

“Maybe they're in the barn?” she suggested. I shrugged, figuring that was a good a guess as any. We all strode outside and to the barn where we continued our search for the fillies. I looked up to the hayloft and decided to look there.

“Fillies... you up there? It's me, Burdy!” I called out but still got no response. I climbed up and took a quick look. Finding nothing, I began rooting through the upper loft of the barn, searching for signs of the young fillies.

Looking around, I figured they probably weren't here. I crouched low and ducked beneath a beam and peered over the edge of the loft floor and down below. 'Damn... I'd hate to fall,' I thought to myself before spinning on my heels and going for the ladder back down.

However, in my haste, I forgot to duck again and smucked my forehead off the low beam. I was slightly dazed and stepped back, quickly regretting my movements as my heels tipped over the edge of the loft. “OH SHOOT!” I screamed as my arms flailed to try and regain my balance.

Just as I began to fall, I felt a presence dart up behind me, pushing against my back and hurling me forwards and into a pile of straw. I rolled over and lay on my back, Derpy atop of me, her mane frazzled and filled with straw. We both looked at each other before first giggling then bursting into laughter.

Spike ascended the ladder and looked to us. His stare was curious, wondering what exactly was funny. Truth be told, I didn't rightly know. “They're... not here either. But I think I know where they could be,” he offered.

Derpy fluttered back down to the ground level while I descended the ladder much like Spike. The young dragon led us outside and pointed to the nearby forest. “They have a tree house they use as their clubhouse.” We all looked to each other and shrugged, figuring it was the best guess we had thus far.

“Lead the way dude,” I told him and he nodded, leading us out to the small patch of apple trees that I would count as a forest. As we drew nearer, I heard giggling voices, along with the noise of hammers and saws in action. Walking up with the others, we spotted the crusaders doing some work to their clubhouse, obviously trying to make an addition but said building not going so well.

Lassie raced up, calling out to them. “Heyah gals, how's it hangin'?” she asked, the three fillies looking to us from their side mounted addition. They gave us all a wave before Applebloom began to complain.

“Ugh... not good. We're tryin' teh make another room in our clubhouse but we just can't get it tuh stay up! The floor keeps falling down!” she whined. I walked up and looked to them.

“So uhh... I guess your sisters all told you I was gonna watch over you?” I asked and Scootaloo's wings sprang out.

“AWWWWLRIGHT! Phew, for a while there we thought we were going to have another crabby foal-sitter, but this is sooo awesome!” she cheered and I scratched the side of my head.

“Uhh... yeah... I uhm...” I trailed off as I looked to their attempt at building an attachment to their clubhouse. It was a pretty bad attempt, as they had no braces or posts to keep the floor up, just some boards that acted as a floor nailed together and screwed to the original building.

“Uhm... well, I can figure out why your floor isn't standing up. You either need some posts running up from the ground, or you need to put like a...” I stepped below the unsturdy floor. “Like an angle brace of sorts, running from the edge over there-” I said, pointing to the far end of the floor, “Back to the original structure,” I told them.

They all looked to each other, then to me. “Can yah help us with that?” Apple Bloom asked and I shrugged.

“Well... ah reckon so. Iffin' yah got an extra hammer er two,” I said, Scootaloo's wings buzzing with excitement.

“Awww yeah, this is gonna look sooOOOOooo sweet when we're done!” she cheered, the three fillies hopping down and getting extra tools for us. I looked to Derpy whom looked to the structure with a curious look... or perhaps she was looking at it regularly and her crisscrossed eyes gave the illusion she was curious...

* * *

Hours later...

It was getting on into the evening and the sun was starting to set over the horizon. We had to take down the fillies original attempt to start anew, but it was coming along well.

I decided the best approach, considering my lack of professional knowledge in proper building, was to build joists off the structure of their original playhouse, then use angle braces to keep it afloat. Additional struts in between the joists would keep it sturdy and then we'd slap a floor over the joists and go from there. It was the best plan I could come up with and the fillies seemed to like the idea.

Lassie and Derpy had disappeared and I couldn't figure out where they went, but alas Spike, the fillies and myself had nearly finished the floor and supported them with angle braces so it wouldn't fall over.

All we really had left was a few more joists, then we'd build the floor and erect the walls after that. From behind the building came Lassie's accomplished voice. “AWWWWW SICK! GUYS, COME CHECK THIS OUT!” She cheered. Our group walked around and quickly realized what Derpy and her had done all day, our jaws dropping.

Attached to the backside of clubhouse was a deck and pool, properly supported and with a slide running down from the second floor of the clubhouse straight into the pool. I blinked in disbelief as Derpy spoke. “We thought it would be fun to have a pool for hot days like today... do you like it?” she asked the fillies, whom looked in utter shock at the deck and pool.

Sweetie Belle shook her head. “No, we don't like it,” she said, much to Derpy's immediate dismay. The three fillies quickly cheered out with bright smiles. “WE LOVE IT!” they cried out as they rushed up and hugged the older mare and my canine companion.

I looked to Lassie, then to the pool filled with water, then to Lassie, to the pool, to Lassies, to the pool and finally back to Lassie. “How'd you... but I... you... what?” I asked in confusion. Lassie just snickered as she quickly leapt her way up the side of the clubhouse like a ninja and picked herself an apple before hopping back down and landing gracefully, looking to me.

“The answer is...” she said, standing to her hindlegs, holding the apple in her right paw whilst placing a little white cloth over the apple. “MAGIC!” she giggled, fluttering away the cloth and revealing a freshly baked apple pie that oozed out an aroma that was so tantalizing I almost dropped to my knees from the smell...

* * *

Third person, elsewhere...

Applejack made her way towards the kitchen as she called out to her friends. “Ah made the best darn apple pie yah'll ever tasted fer desert. Yah'll gonna love it!” she assured them as she walked towards the windowsill then gasped in complete and utter dismay, like a heinous crime had been committed. Her freshly baked apple pie was gone, and in its place was just a single red apple...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

“Hungry anypony?” she asked, our stomachs all rumbling. “Mmm... me too,” she said, pulling out a knife and cutting the pie into several proportionate pieces, one for each of us. Despite having seven in our group, Lassie managed to cut it up evenly.

We all downed our piece of pie but even so, I could tell it wasn't enough to tide us over. Applebloom picked up. “Ah'm still kinda hungry,” she said.

Sweetie Belle nodded. “Me too!” she whined.

Scootaloo's stomach rumbled much like my own. “Me three!” she groaned, rubbing her tummy. I scratched the side of my head, finding it hard to think on an empty stomach, added to the fact we had been working today, I was feeling quite peckish.

“Well... uhm... I didn't really cook anything but uhm-” Lassie quickly cut me short.

“TAKE OUT! Let's go to that romantic little food stand. You know, back when I was a puppy and you'd bring me with you on dates with-” I put a hand over her muzzle, not wanting anypony to think I went on dates with my mother.

“To dinner with mum. Yeah. That's a great idea actually. Hey, do you gals wanna go out for dinner tonight? My treat, I'll pay,” I offered and they all nodded. I let go of Lassie's mouth and she spat at the ground between my feet.

“BLECK! Gross...” she coughed, rubbing her nose as though I stank. The seven of us made our way back to the truck. Having been exhausted from the heat, I tossed my duster coat and vest in the back seat. Piling into Cadance, I started her up and looked into the rear view mirror.

Spike, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo and Apple Bloom all managed to fit into the back seat nicely, thanks to their size. Lassie sat between Derpy and I, constantly leaning over and licking my face, much to the amusement of the fillies in the back.

Puttering away, I drove us back into Ponyville and to that small little catering trailer Twilight and I used to always go to. Pulling up, I put Cadance in park and we all piled out. All walking over, the Cutie Mark Crusaders, Spike, Lassie and Derpy looked at the menus, the owner raising a brow, realizing it was going to be a big order.

Scootaloo looked to me. “What can I have?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Whatever you want... I mean, as long as it's on the menu,” I told her and her wings sprang out.

“Anything I want?” she asked excitedly and I nodded blankly. “WOW! Cool, you're the best!” She gave me a tight hug then looked back to the menu. “Can I have some pancakes? Lots of them?” she asked and the owner looked to her with a risen brow.

“Pancakes? In the evening?” he asked then looked to me, to which I just shrugged with a stupid look. “I suppose so,” he said. The others all ordered and I just got a funnel cake with a milkshake, figuring I'd make myself up something when we got back home. Hayburgers didn't sound all that appealing.

All in all it was just shy of two hundred bits, around twenty bits for each of us, plus Lassie ordered a bunch of extra stuff to go... for later, so she says.

The owner said it would take a while to cook up, and it would be roughly an hour. “So what are we supposed to do for an hour?!” Sweetie Belle squeaked and Lassie clapped her front paws.

“Hide and seek! Dibs not being it,” she said, rushing off into the thick grass of the fields nearby.

“Hey wait up!” Scootaloo cried out, rushing after her, quickly followed by the others young ones. I took a relaxing seat on a picnic table, Derpy sitting beside me.

“Thank you,” Derpy said and I looked to her with a risen brow. “For taking me out with you and paying for dinner. It's very nice of you,” she told me and I just brushed it off.

“Nah. I should thank you Derpy. They think that pool is the coolest thing ever.” I looked out to the field. Despite calling to not be the one looking for the others, Lassie was sniffing around in the tall grass, the only way I could see her was her long fluffy tail raised above the grass, waving to and fro.

Derpy and I watched the setting sun in the horizon, the kids joyfully playing in the field together. I looked to Derpy, her eyes seeming to gleam in the setting sunlight, along with the rest of her face. “You know Derpy... I don't think I ever got to thank you,” I said and she looked to me with a curious look.

“For what? You're always saving me. I should be the one thanking you,” she told me but I shook my head.

“Nah... when I first got here, I was really out of place. I was brash, arrogant, hot headed... maybe even mean... but you were my first, and for a long time, my only friend,” I said. She rested a hoof over my hand and just giggled.

“Well, you weren't really 'that' bad. Maybe gruff. But everypony is different. And besides, you were really nice to me, even when I got the mail wrong,” she assured me.

“Well... regardless, thank you,” I gave her my thanks to which she just giggled and blushed slightly, the red hue across her cheeks making her look pretty cute. As we sat there and watched the setting sun, I thought of something.

“Hey Derpy... I uhh... don't suppose you'd like to stay over. I don't know that much about kids,” I suggested and she looked to me.

“Well, I don't either,” she replied.

“Oh... well uhm... you know, I could use the extra help anyways. As good as Lassie is... she's still kind of foalish.” I chuckled and looked back out to the field where Lassie had found everypony but Scootaloo.

“Well... okay, if you want. But only if you cook breakfast, I'm not very good at it,” she stated and I just chuckled.

“Okay, deal,” I replied, both of us turning around and bumping flanks. “Tail Twist Swear,” I said, to which she seconded. Time passed by and eventually the world was basked into the beauty of night. The street lamps came on and the wonderful moon dimly illuminated the fields where the fillies played with Spike and Lassie.

The silence that had descended upon Derpy and myself while we enjoyed the night was soon interrupted by the vendor as he came around. “Here you are,” he said, placing down all our food.

I tossed him a Luna bit for a tip and his eyes went wide. “Keep it,” I said with my best attempt at a wink. I whistled out and Lassie's head poked up out of the grass.

“I smell food!” she chimed, ducking her head back into the grass and rushing along. I could see the grass moving about as they all rushed back towards the picnic bench. Popping out of the grass, Lassie was the first to reach the table, followed closely by Scootaloo, then Apple Bloom and finally Spike and Sweetie Belle.

Not much was said as the kids dug into their food. I sat with a smile and caught eyes with Derpy. I gave a half assed smile and just shrugged. Lassie was downing all her food like a pig, not bothering to use utensils and simply plowing her face into her plates of food and slopping it up.

I couldn't help but laugh as she lifted her head just enough to lick her nose to get some of the excess that had splashed on her face. Derpy and the kids giggled too. Lassie, being somewhat of an attention seeker, looked to us with a risen brow. “Oh... you think that's cool, watch this,” she said, taking a string of spaghetti and stuffing one end up her nose then snorting. Half the string hung out of her nose, while the other half came out her mouth. Derpy looked fascinated, while the others just laughed joyfully, thinking it was hysterical.

I rose a brow and she sucked back, the string of spaghetti disappearing. The fillies and Spike giggled while Derpy gave a shocked expression. “Wait... did that just go up to your brain?” she asked, making me laugh as well as Lassie.

Time passed on, and as it did so did the food. Sweeite Belle yawned, followed by Apple Bloom and Spike. I looked to my watch and realized it was quite late, 10:33pm to be exact. “Well, I guess I should be getting you all to bed,” I mentioned but Scootaloo pouted slightly.

“Aww, but I'm not even tiraaaarhed,” she yawned the last part, making me chuckle just slightly.

“Come on... you guys all look pretty beat. It was a long day. I'm pretty beat myself. If we all get a good night's rest then we can probably finish that extension to your clubhouse tomorrow,” I made mention. Standing up, I let out another yawn that was coupled with a stretch.

Walking towards Cadance I went to wave to the vendor as I passed, but realized his cart was closed and he was long gone now. Hmm, last customers of the night I guess. Opening the passenger door, I let the young ones into the back, then slid the seat back to let Derpy take shotgun.

Walking around, I hopped into the driver seat and patted Cadance's steering wheel. “Well... what's say it ol' girl?” I asked then keyed the ignition before driving back towards the Apple farmhouse. On the way back I nearly dozed off but kept myself awake for everypony's sake.

I was wiped, and I hadn't even done that much today. Pulling up to the front of the house I shut Cadance down then looked to the back where the others were nearly passed out. “Come on, we're almost there,” I told them. I got out and made my way back over to the passenger side, nearly tripping in my state of exhaustion.

Opening the door, the group all piled out and drowsily made their way to the house. Shutting the door behind them, I followed suit. Lassie was the first to crash, curling up on the welcome rug and Spike snuggling up next to her. I smirked. As cute as it was, I couldn't really let Spike sleep on the floor. Gently picking him up, I laid him down in the living room chair, his body nicely curled up on the seat.

I escorted the fillies upstairs. Apple Bloom must have planned this out because she had her room set up for her guests, having two extra beds set up. I wasn't sure if they fell asleep the moment they hit the mattresses or if they had simply passed out and flopped down onto their respective beds.

I let out a content sigh as I shut their door. I began to roam the house, shutting off the lights that didn't need to be on. Derpy sighed to herself. “Well... I guess I'll be going now,” she said. I put a hand on her shoulder.

“You don't need to go if you don't want to. I mean, I'm not going to hold you here against your will, but if you're going to come by tomorrow... why not just stay here? Besides, you don't wanna miss breakfast, remember?” I offered and she smiled.

“Sure. I'd like that,” she replied, her face almost glowing. I escorted her to what I presumed to be Applejack's room. It was a little too modern to strike me as Granny Smith's, and although tomboyish, it was a little more feminine than what I'd expect from Big Mac.

“Where are you going to sleep though?” Derpy asked and I just yawned again.

“Probably the couch. I'd take Mac's bed but I think I'm taller than him. The couch seems a bit more my size,” I informed her. “Well... night Derpy, sleep tight,” I gave a nod which she returned.

“You too,” she nearly whispered before gently shutting the door. I made my way back downstairs but as I was about to head into the living room, I noticed the driver side door of Cadance was ajar, leaving the cab and dome light on.

I let out an exhausted huff, remembering that I had left it open when I made my way to the passenger seat to let everypony out. Making my way outside, I smiled contently to myself, thinking about all the fun times I had with this old girl. I moved slowly, trailing my hand across her hood, the smooth metal was almost silky to the touch. I kept trailing my hand along the truck, shutting the door and making my way to the backside of her.

I popped open the tailgate and hopped in the bed of the truck. I scooched myself up to the very front of the box and leaned my head against the headache light rack. I had no energy to make my way back inside. Leaning over, I grabbed a rifle from one of the toolboxes.

The old Soviet sniper rifle rested heavy in my hands. Painted glossy black, it almost looked nightmarish, but also had a sense of beauty about it. As I rested there, a peaceful theme started to play through my mind. Despite being made of metal with not much in the way of padding, I found comfort in lying down in my truck's box and falling soundly to sleep...

* * *

I couldn't exactly tell what was happening. All I knew was that my vision was blurred and fizzy at best. I heard the rumble of thousands upon thousands of boots marching. As my vision came into slightly better focus, I saw the origin of said noise.

There were perfectly square formations, consisting of over a hundred men for each. Every single one of them marched together with perfect precision, every step a single, unified, thunderous stride.

I wasn't sure why... or how exactly I noticed, but somehow I spotted one man that stood out from the rest. He was tall and had a thickset body. His shoulders were broad and he seemed to fit snugly into his trench coat, where others fit rather loosely. He wore a jet black ushanka that protected his head and ears from the brisk climate. Snow covered the ground but none the least the soldiers marched on like it was nothing.

His head was turned to one side, as was most of the troops in the square formation. His facial features looked... defined, chiseled almost. He had the look of someone who had been through eternity of battle yet didn't let it faze him. In his arms rested a Mosin Nagant, fitted with a scope-

* * *

-I gasped while my body sat straight up in a hurry, my heart racing. My head turned side to side in blurry motions as I scanned the area for... I wasn't sure what had spooked me awake. Or maybe it was my dream. I didn't know. I couldn't even recall what I had been dreaming about.

I stroked a hand through my hair, which had grown considerable length despite having been cut recently. “Whew... haaa...” I let out a few long exhales as I let my body relax. Looking to my watch, I realized it was nearing 5am. Not nearly enough sleep in my books but not enough would easily suffice for me. I set Trillium back into the toolbox and decided to get a foot ahead on things and start breakfast.

I walked into the Apple Family residence, leaving my coat at the door along with my hat and boots. Once in the kitchen, I started rooting through the fridge and cupboards, quickly deciding that this morning would be light fluffy pancakes, along with toast and eggs.

Not long after I had started cooking, Lassie was up. At first she just went to use the washroom but must have smelt the pancakes because afterwards she was walking towards the kitchen, audibly sniffing the air.

“Mmm-mmm! Damn that smells mighty tasty!” she chimed. I smirked, rolling my eye as I flipped the pancakes.

“Think the kids'll be up soon?” I asked but only got an 'Ah dunno' as a response. Figures. I didn't want to nescassarily wake them up if they were enjoying a good sleep but I also didn't want the food going cold.

Finishing one batch of pancakes, I set them aside in a stack then started another batch. The sun started it's ascent over the horizon, basking a wonderful morning glow over the world. Lassie stood up beside me and started cooking the eggs.

Before long, I heard hoofsteps coming down the stairs. I took a quick peek over my shoulder and spotted Derpy. Her hair was frazzled and gave her a definite bedhead look. I chuckled to myself as she mingled over and took a seat at the dinning table.

“Mornin',” I greeted, which was followed by a yawn from the grey pegasus. Not even a moment later, I heard the clutter of hooves as the three fillies rushed down the stairs and zoomed into the kitchen.

“IT'S TODAY, IT'S TODAY, IT'S TODAY!” the three of them cheered. I blinked unsurely, the pancakes nearly burning as I looked to the overly enthusiastic fillies.

“Today?” I asked and the three nodded in a joyful blur.

“The fair! It's here! It's today! Can you take us, can you take us, can you take us?!” they all chimed then simmered down slightly and all looked to me with big, wide, puppy dog eyes. “Pwetty pwease?” they all asked and I just chuckled. They didn't have to put on such a show...

“Uhh, yeah-yeah... uhm, sure but first...” I said, grabbing the first batch of pancakes. “Maybe have something to eat?” I offered them the plate.

“Then can we go right away?” Sweetie Belle asked. I chuckled and gave a nod.

“Sure, sure. Well, you guys might wanna take a shower or bath first,” I stated and they all gave a pouty face. “I'm just sayin... it won't take long,” I told them. “Then right after, we'll go to the fair. Promise,” I assured them.

They were quick to get their respective plates and start wolfing down their breakfasts. I just laughed inwardly. “Careful. Don't wanna get a tummy ache,” I warned. Not moments later, Spike was the last to arrive to the kitchen.

“Oh boy, something smells good!” he made mention and I pulled out a plate, fork and knife for him.

“Uh-huh. Pancakes with eggs and toast on the side. There's also milk or apple juice if yah get thirsty,” I told him, serving him up a plate of the last pancakes. He looked, seeing that there was no more from the first batch.

“What about you?” he asked and I merely lifted the frying pan lid, revealing more pancakes on the go. “Ahh. Okay, I don't feel so bad taking the last ones now,” he said, taking a seat. A short time went by and I served up the second batch of pancakes to the kids and started on the last batch for Derpy, myself and Lassie.

As the final batch was nearly finished, the fillies ate the last of their food and Scootaloo stood up. “Okay! Time for a bath!” she nearly squealed and I nodded.

“Oky doke. When you're done we'll go,” I said, flipping the pancakes out onto a plate. The three of them stood there idle. I turned and saw them staring at me. “Uhm... I'm just gonna have some pancakes and uhh... I'll probably use the outside shower...” I trailed off.

“We need help. We can't wash our backs by ourselves...”

* * *

Derpy and Lassie were downstairs finishing their breakfast while I tended to the bathing needs of the three fillies I was foalsitting, whom all sat in the tub filled with warm, bubbly water. Scootaloo pushed around a little rubber ducky while Apple Bloom scrubbed her mane with apple smelling shampoo.

I gently scrubbed Sweetie Belle's back with a foam brush filled with body wash. Scootaloo stood up suddenly and looked to me, wiping off the foam bubbles that covered her body. “Why do we have to wear bathing suits in the tub?” she asked curiously and I cocked my jaw to one side.

“Because you're... fillies and I'm... I don't know, just sit back down, we're almost done,” I told her.

“But we don't wear clothes anywhere. Why should we wear clothes in the tub?” she asked and I didn't rightly answer.

“Because... when you're older I'll tell you,” I stated, taking a pitcher of water and washing Sweetie Belle off. I will say, it didn't feel overly weird washing fillies, but were they not wearing bathing clothes I definitely may have made someone else do it... and probably not Lassie just because.

Taking another pitcher of water, I helped wash Apple Bloom's mane. Finishing up, I pulled the plug and let the water drain. Taking the several pitchers of water, I washed off the excess bubbles and the fillies all piled out of the tub. I took some towels and helped them dry off, since it was obviously difficult for fillies to dry themselves.

Shaking wildly, Scootaloo turned into a poofy ball of fuzz. I patted her down and her wings sprang out. “OKAY! TIME TO GO!” She chimed and I sighed.

“Yeah, just let me take a shower first-” they all gave a long disgruntled 'AWWWWW'. “Yeah, I know I said right after you bathed but I figured I'd shower while you all washed up. It'll only take a few minutes. Besides, it's only like...” I looked to my watch. “8:30. We'll be there by nine and play all day, promise,” I told them and Apple Bloom spoke up.

“As long as we want?” she asked and I nodded.

“As long as you want.” They all gave me a hug then scurried downstairs, cheering that they were going to the fair. I grabbed two towels for myself and went outside to the small walled-in shower that was on the other side of the barn. I had used said shower a few times in the past when it was scorching hot and I was working for Applejack.

Tossing my clothes aside, I hung the towels over the door of the shower and turned on the nozzles. My body shuddered as I was cascaded by icy cold water which soon turned warm. I quickly started scrubbing myself down with body wash, also making note to shampoo my hair, which I noticed gave me an apple aroma much like Apple Bloom.

'Now I know why Applejack always smells like apples,' I thought to myself, remembering all the times I had smelt her before seeing her while working in the fields.

I heard a musical beat drop followed by an iconic voice.

'Foxy...
Foxy...'

I looked and saw Lassie with a beat box, dancing erotically... erm... while, I suppose that was what she was trying to pawn off as erotic with the way she had her rump in the air, tail cocked to the side and swinging her hips to and fro... not that I'd consider it erotic.

“Foxy lady... ngh!” Lassie moaned as she danced to the beat then looked to me and winked. I just shook my head but she kept dancing to the beat. Dammit, as if she found that CD of all things to play while I was showering.

“Show me what yah got stud,” she said with a moan, forcing me to groan with discomfort. Peeking over my shoulder I noticed her watching me, tail wagging. With a shake of my head I quickly finished my shower and grabbed my towels, drying off and looking to her.

“You're pregnant... and you're still as horny as ever,” I mentioned and she nodded.

“Yah dude, what did you think? That if I got knocked up I'd start acting normal? Do you know how many hormones are going through my body now?” she asked and there was a moments pause before she laid on her back. “Belly wub?” she asked, giving me puppy dog eyes and a pouty lip.

“What? How do you go from-” but she cut me short.

“Pwwwwwwwwease?” she whined and I sighed, kneeling down and rubbing her belly. She panted happily, her tongue lolling out and drooling heavily before looking to me with a smirk.

“My nipples are very sensitive,” she giggled, making me jump back with disgust.

“ECH! UGHHHH! Lassie... okay, now I know why you were horny then suddenly wanted a belly rub...” I grunted.

I got up and made my way over to my clothes, dropping the towels around my body and once again dawning my western wear. As I neared the house, I realized Derpy and Spike had also taken a quick wash and that everypony was waiting on me.

“Alrighty then... I suppose I've made you wait long enough,” I told them, the three fillies squealing. I quickly stepped into the doorway and grabbed my duster and hat then made my way to Cadance with the others.

I patted Cadance's steering wheel and keyed the ignition. “A'right ol' girl... let's roll,” I said, the others already sitting in their respective seats and waiting. “So where is this fair?” I asked and Scootaloo was quick to answer.

“On the other side of town!” she squealed with excitement. I cranked the truck into reverse, backing up before shifting into drive and puttering off. The fillies in the back chatted with excitement, talking about the first things they'd be doing. Lassie joined in and I simply looked to Derpy.

“So?” I asked. She looking to me with a curious look.

“So what?” she asked back and I shrugged.

“Whatta yah think? The fair?” I asked and she gave an 'Ah dunno' kind of look.

“I don't usually go. There's not many ponies who would go with me to the annual fair.”

“Their loss. Think today will be fun?” I asked and Scootaloo pipped up in the back.

“Well duh. Fairs are totally awesome!” she remarked and I laughed. After a few minutes of driving I found the fair. It wasn't anything particularly jaw droppingly spectacular, but it was definitely something to behold.

There were probably over two dozen rides from what I could see, vendors at every corner, some farm animals on display, among many other attractions. I pulled my truck up and parked her near the fence, but before I could step out, a motorized carriage puttered up beside me. I recognized it in an instant.

It was the one I had smoked on my way to the hospital with Fluttershy, all those months ago. Out stepped Diamond Tiara and that other one, Silver Spoon, along with Filthy Rich whom I had met only seldom but never formally.

I opened my door and stepped out along with the others, much to Tiara's amusement. “Oh look, it's the blank flanks!” Her and the silver one giggled cruelly but before I could make a witty comeback, her father scorned her.

“Tiara! That's not very polite.” He turned to me. “I'm sorry, she can be a little... misleading at times. She means well,” he said, extending his hoof. “Mr. Rich,” he said and I shook his hoof with my hand.

“Burdick,” I replied and he nodded. Only my friends called my Burdy.

“Ah yes. My daughter speaks of you on occasion. The hairless monkey?” he asked and I exhaled with a huff.

“Yeah... let's go with that,” I replied, looking to see that Tiara was once again trying to get under the skill of the other fillies.

“Daddy ordered us ride all day passes, so we don't have to pay for every single ride. We can just ride again and again,” she stated in a snooty tone, displaying a wrist band that went over one of her front hooves.

Rich called for his daughter and her friend and the trio trotted off towards the fair, the two fillies trotting with snide looks on their faces. 'What a bitch,' I thought silently to myself before looking to the others and motioning with my head for them to follow me.

Sweetie Belle spoke up. “Can we get ride all day passes too?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Uhh... sure,” I replied as we neared the entrance. Walking up to the admission booth I leaned over to the younger teen who was working admissions. “Uhh... hey, can I get some of those ride passes?” I asked and he looked to me before speaking in a squeaky voice.

“Sorry mister,” he began, his voice obviously cracked from puberty. “You have to pre-order them,” he informed me. I looked back to the fillies, whom look slightly distraught from the information, having obviously had their hearts set on those silly bands.

I reached into my wallet and fished out a Celestia bit. “I uhh... did order them.” I said setting the bit down in front of the teen who's eyes went wide. I leaned over and whispered to him. “I'm sure you've got dozens of extra ones in boxes. They're just stupid little bands. I only need some for the three fillies and the dragon,” I told him and he swallowed hard.

I fished out another Celestia bit and slid the two coins towards the colt. In reality, it'd probably be cheaper just to buy ride tickets but I wanted to see the fillies smile. He quickly scooped up the coins, pocketing them and rushing to the back of the booth and rummaging through some boxes before coming back with four bands.

“Here you go sir! Have a wonderful day!” he squeaked. I walked over to the fillies and Spike, giving them the bands which they hastily strapped on.

“AWW COOL! YOU'RE THE MOST AWESOME PERSON EVER!” Scootaloo squealed with delight, the four of them hugging me tightly. I just smiled as we all proceeded into the fairgrounds.

I took a brief glance towards the teen colt, seeing him admiring his two Celestia bits. Lassie stood up to her hindlegs and whispered into my ear. “You bribed him, didn't you?” she asked and I nodded. “I figured as much. Either that or he gave them to you for being famous,” she mentioned before falling to all fours.

Apple Bloom piped up, pointing over to a giant swinging pendulum ride. “Woah, look at that one!” she squealed, the three fillies and Spike rushING towards it.

'CRAP!' I thought as Derpy and I rushed after them, not wanting to lose them. They stood near the entrance gate of the ride and we all looked in awe as the giant swinging arm swung back and forth at nauseating angles, nearly going upside down at some points.

“WOW! Can we go on?” Scootaloo asked, the four young ones looking to me.

“Uhh... yeah sure, I guess,” I stated. There weren't many ponies in line for this particular ride, maybe due to the intensity. As the ride stopped, the pony running the ride started admitting ponies to enter. As the young ones entered, Spike looked back.

“Uhh... aren't you coming?” he asked, a little nervously. I shook my head.

“Nah, you guys go on without me. I'm probably a little too big-” but the admission pony cut me short.

“Uhh... I don't think so,” he said in a squeaky voice, he too being a puberty struck teen. “We can fit minotaurs on this ride. So you should be able to fit,” he stated and I sighed.

“Come on!” Scootaloo cheered and I let out a deep exhale.

“Oh... alright,” I went to step forwards but the admission pony stopped me.

“Sorry sir, but you either need some tickets or a wrist band,” he told me and I groaned. I looked around and spotted a ticket booth. “I'll wait for you, just don't be too long,” he told me and I rushed over to the booth. The mare behind the booth window looked at me in surprise from my rush. I tossed her two Luna bits and her eyes went wide.

“Oh... uhm, one moment,” she said, grabbing out an entire roll of tickets and handing them over. I scooped them up and rushed back, dust kicking up behind my heels. I skidded to a stop and looked to the admission pony.

“How much?” I asked and he pointed to the sign that read two tickets per pony.

“Me too, me too!” Lassie chimed. I looked to Derpy.

“Wanna tag along?” I asked and she gulped. Looking up to the pivot point and the pendulum arm.

“It looks scary...” she trailed off but Apple Bloom piped up from the ride, having already taken a seat.

“Come on! Hurry up. We're all waitin'!” she called out. Derpy bit her lip. I rested an assuring hand on her shoulder.

“I'll sit beside you,” I offered and she nodded timidly. How could a pegasus, aside from Fluttershy, be afraid of heights? I gave the pony six tickets along with the roll. “Can you hold onto these?” I asked and he nodded.

Derpy Lassie and I walked up to the ride and took our seats, Derpy sitting beside me. The pony walked along and strapped us into our seats with padded safety bars. Walking back to the operating booth, he spoke up through the speaker system, telling us to hold on tight and enjoy the ride.

The ride pulled one way, quickly gaining speed. I felt Derpy's hoof grab my hand tightly, and I held tight, not letting go. The pendulum arm started to swing with greater and greater force, and pretty soon we were nearly being put upside down with each thrusting swing.

Derpy let out a yelp for the first time as the arm swung downwards while I let out a thrilled howl. Soon after the ride started slowing down and finally came to a stop. The safety bars rose and the fillies, Spike and Lassie all rushed towards the exit, giggling about how awesome that was and how they should definitely go again.

Derpy was stiff in her seat and I looked to her. “Too much?” I asked and she let out a deep exhale, her stiff form nearly deflating. “Come on, I won't make you ride it again. I'll find you a seat,” I said, the pegasus having obviously been terrified from the ride.

“That was scary,” Derpy whispered and I nodded, escorting her off the ride. Collecting the roll of tickets from the operator, I was suddenly grabbed by my pant leg and dragged along by Sweetie Belle.

“Come on, this way, Lassie found a UFO!” She stated ecstatically, dragging myself and Derpy along to another ride. There was a slightly longer lineup to this one which was some sort of spacecraft that spun around on the spot. I supposed the riders sat inside.

“Come on, Lassie and the others are already in line!” Sweetie Belle informed me. I looked to Derpy, whom was obviously still dazed from the last ride.

“If you want, you can sit this one out. I have a feeling it's not very subtle,” I offered and she nodded thankfully. “Here, if you wouldn't mind holding these.” I gave her the roll of tickets, breaking off a few for Lassie and myself.

I made my way to the lineup just as the ride came to a stop, several ponies staggering out dizzily. 'Oh geeze...'

* * *

The day progressed with the fillies dragging me around to several of the thrill rides, Derpy sitting out most of them and only going on the less intense rides. I didn't blame her. If I didn't really feel obliged to go on the rides with the fillies, I probably wouldn't have went on many either.

We went on rides ranging from the pendulum arm to spinning apples to bumper carts. We even went into a mirror maze of which I smucked my head twice by running into a barrier while trying to keep up with the fillies.

The day was progressing and it was getting late into the afternoon. As Scootaloo was pulling me along to another ride we suddenly crossed paths with Tiara, Silver Spoon and Filthy Rich. Tiara and Spoon both had small stuffed animals.

“Hey blank flanks,” Tiara teased but Scootaloo just scoffed.

“Blank flanks nothing. Look what we have,” she replied, showing off her ride all day pass. Tiara just laughed snidely.

“Pfft so? Look what we have. We won them at the soaker game,” she said, brandishing her stuffy. “Oh... I guess you're not good enough to win one though,” she laughed, her father lightly scolding her before the group departed towards another attraction.

“URGGGH! Why that... she always thinks she's sooo smart!” Sweetie Belle grumbled, Tiara having obviously gotten under her, and the other crusaders' for that matter, skin. Scootaloo tugged at my pantleg.

“Can we win some too?” she asked, pointing over to a midway game. There were these little water gun sprayer turrets and a little target in front of each player's turret.

The carny spotted us and called our group over. “Hey yah'll! Feel like playin' a round? All yah gotta do is spray the target till the clown's balloon nose pops. Everyone's a winner, but the one who wins first gets a bigger prize!” he chimed.

I looked to the racks of prizes. There were really small prizes, then there were small prizes, then medium sized prizes, then larger prizes and finally there were huge stuffed animals. The ones Tiara and Silver had were a step above the smallest prize, so they had obviously both won at least one round.

“Alright, how much?” I asked.

“Just two bits per player. Whatta yah say daddy-o?” he asked, nudging me. I suppose he got the wrong impression I was these fillies' father.

“Sure, sure.” I pulled out fourteen bits, enough for us all to play.

“Alright, we have a game started. Players take aim, we'll start in just a moment's time,” he called out on a microphone that projected his voice through a speaker. We all took our seats, taking hold of our water sprayers. “All right... starting in three... two... one, GO!” he called, our water sprayers going live and hosing out a stream of water. I quickly redirected my stream at the clown's mouth and the water started filling the clown's balloon nose.

However quick I was, I heard the splashing pop of a balloon and looked over to see that Apple Bloom had taken first place. “Alright, we have a winner ladies and gentle colts. Here yah are little lady,” he said, handing her over a small prize before giving us each one of the smallest stuffed animals.

Sweetie Belle spoke up. “Can we play again? I wanna win that one,” she mentioned, pointing to the big tiger. I looked to the carny.

“How do you win the biggest ones?” I asked and he quickly began explaining it like it was easy.

“Well it's simple really. All yah gotta do is combine two prizes of the smaller prizes to get the next stage. So you take two of the smallest prizes to get a small prize. Then you need two small prizes to win a medium, and two mediums to win a large and finally two larges to win a grand prize!” he cheered like it was a deal.

I did a quick mental calculation. “So we need to play like... thirty-six times to win a grand prize?” I asked and he nodded. I blinked then shook my head. “Uhh... yeah, we'll come back later,” I said, the carny giving a frown. I rubbed my belly. “We're hungry, and that'll take a little while,” I told him before turning to the others. “Come on guys.” I led them away before thinking to myself. 'Pfft... what a rip.'

“You guys hungry?” I asked, looking to my watch and realizing it was getting on in the day, being seven in the afternoon. My stomach grumbled along with Scootaloo's and Lassie's.

Spike nodded. “Yeah... I haven't eaten since breakfast,” he mentioned, much to Sweetie Belle's amusement.

“None of us have, silly,” she laughed. We made our way over to a vendor booth that served french fries and hayburgers, along with drinks and a few other side dishes like onion rings or nachos. Each one of us, minus Lassie and myself, got a hayburger and fries while I ordered an extra dish of fries and Lassie got a large order of poutine.

Getting our order, we took a seat at the picnic tables set up. I let out a deep, relieved exhale, finally getting to stop and rest after having been going on ride after ride. For a carnival in a small town, this was a pretty decent fair.

“Mmm, these hayburgers are great!” Scootaloo mentioned. Apple Bloom nodded in agreement.

“Yeah. Thanks for bringing us Evan!” she gave me her thanks, along with the others. I just gave a nod with an 'A-ok' hand gesture.

We sat for a little while, enjoying our food before Scootaloo stood up. “Come on. I wanna play that squirt game again!” she mentioned and I quickly tried to dissuade her.

“Why not try a different game? There might be something a little more fun than that,” I suggested. “Come on, let's look around,” I said, our group standing up and walking off to the midway.

Lassie stood up to her hindlegs and whispered to me. “Is it just me or was that water sprayer game a complete rip?” she asked and I nodded.

“Yeah, we would've spent over six hundred bits to win that lion, or tiger, or whatever.” Lassie nodded.

“Yeah, I figured as much. Carny games are kinda a ripoff and are definitely rigged.” Lassie fell back to all fours as we walked along. Sweetie Belle pointed out a game.

“Cool, look at that one!” she said before rushing over. We all followed her to a game with dozens upon dozens of balloons.

“Howdy there folks, wanna play a round of darts?” he asked. “It's easy, just hit a balloon and yah win a prize. Hit one of the smaller, glittery balloons and you win a medium, but...” he said, taking out a pointing stick and pointing to the top of the board. “Hit one of these small stars up here and you get a large prize,” he stated. The game was a better deal than the water guns. The small prizes were about the size of the small prizes from the water guns, and the same went for the medium prizes which were won by hitting one of the few glittery balloons. The large prize was one of the tigers that Sweetie Belle wanted, but the star that needed to be hit was only about 2cm in diameter, which was a helluva gander to hit.

“How much?” I asked.

“Three bits for five darts or five for ten,” he stated, obviously trying to persuade players into buying ten since it seemed like you would get a deal.

“Sure uhh... give me twenty darts,” I said, figuring we could each have a throw or two. I passed him over ten bits and in return he gave twenty darts. I gave three darts to each of the others while only taking two for myself. I didn't really want to play, nor did I need any stuff animals.

Lassie threw first, missing her first dart. “Heh... watch this,” she said, taking aim at a glittery balloon and tossing. Her dart however, simply bounced off. I suppose by underfilling the balloon to make it smaller, it gave the balloon a better resistance to being popped. “WHAT!” she gasped before whipping her final dart at the board, striking a regular balloon and popping it.

“Hey, a winner!” the carny announced, giving her a small prize. Lassie however, was not impressed, grumbling to herself as the others tossed their darts. Each of the fillies won a small prize, Derpy won two and Spike got ready to toss his darts.

Sweetie Belle pointed to the small star. “Spike, can you try to win the big tiger for me?” she asked and Spike blushed.

“Uhh... heh-heh, sure thing,” he chuckled nervously before tossing his first dart and missing by a considerable margin. He bit his lip and threw another, again missing terribly. I will give him credit, the blue star was small and throwing darts was a pain.

He took aim and tossed his last dart, only being off by just two inches. Spike gasped, having been so close yet so far. I leaned over to whisper to the carny. “Hey buddy...” I fished out a Luna bit. “Why dontcha... yah know,” I whispered with a wink and he nodded.

“That'd give yah'll a lotta darts to play,” he said and I groaned.

“No man...” I trailed off and looked to the fillies who weren't exactly paying attention to me. “That was pretty close... they're just kids, make 'em happy, yah know?” I said but he shook his head.

“Sorry mister. Those are the rules and yah gotta play by 'em.” I sighed and irritably stuffed the Luna bit back into my pocket. I looked at my two darts then to the small star. My middle finger danced along the green dart, rolling it back and forth before picking it up and giving it a toss, the dart falling short and landing a few inches below the target.

I gave the star a squinty eyed look, much like a Clint Eastwood glare, then fished Cadance's keys from my pocket and gave them a graceful kiss, my good luck charm. “Alright baby... let's do this,” I said, determined to all hell to win this prize. I thumbed the final blue dart around in my hand before leaning my arm forwards, gauging the dart's trajectory when I tossed it.

Cocking my arm back, I gave the dart a whizzing toss, the tip jabbing into the right arm of the star. The carny nodded with an impressed look on his face but I could see it. Deep down, he was regretting not taking the bribe. Sucking down his pride he simply called out. “HEY! LOOK AT THAT FOLKS. A GRAND PRIZE WINNER!” He called out, gaining several passing ponies' attention.

I looked to Sweetie Belle. “Okay, so which one did you want?” I asked her and she joyfully pointed to the striped tiger, nearly jumping with joy. “That's the one she wants,” I told the carny whom took down the tiger and handed it over.

Sweetie Belle squealed in delight, hopping around in joy as she squeezed her newest toy. I felt a little bad inside, wishing it was Spike whom had won it for Sweetie Belle, but in the end she was happy nonetheless.

“Come on guys, let's go try something else,” I suggested. We walked along, looking at all the games. Lassie quickly pointed one out and we followed her over. There were several bottles with vertical rings attached to the tops of them. On the counter were several fishing rods, though the hooks weren't sharp.

The carny came over and looked to me. “Wanna play. It's really easy. Just hook a bottle with the fishing rod and claim your prize. Each bottle has a note of what kind of prize you can win, ranging anywhere from a small prize to a ride all day pass or even a roll of ride tickets,” she stated. I looked up. There were several prizes to be won, large stuffed animals, cowpony hats, fishing gear and some smaller prizes. The carny leaned over. “But, if you're really lucky, you'll get the golden ticket,” she said and I rose my brow.

“Golden ticket?” I asked and she nodded.

“See that fishing boat over there?" she asked, pointing over to a nearby boat on stands. "Get the golden ticket and you win it. One of these bottles has the golden ticket. Just three bits per play,” she said. I handed over twenty-one bits, enough for us each to try.

We all grabbed our fishing rods and hung the hooks over the bottles, trying effortlessly to get a bottle which was the easy part. Each of us retrieved a bottle and emptied them out to see our prizes. Most of us just got a small prize but Lassie won a medium sized dog prize.

“Aww yeah, look at this!” she said, hugging her newfound toy before standing up to whisper to me. "I know exactly what I'll do to him." I just rolled my eye before Apple Bloom gasped, having found the golden ticket.

“WOAH! Look what I got!” she said aloud. We all looked over and the carny looked with shock.

“Well look at that, someone got the golden ticket!” she said but Apple Bloom just sighed.

“I know I win the boat... but can I trade it for a hat...” she trailed off and looked to me. “One just like his,” she stated and I was nearly staggered by her words.

“A-Apple Bloom... you could just sell the boat... err, I'll buy you one-” but she quickly cut me off.

“I know... but this way I'll have won it myself, and I can be just like you and my sister,” she said. I blinked, completely baffled by her words. The carny blinked.

“Are you sure little filly? I don't want anypony thinking I ripped you off,” she asked and Apple Bloom nodded, her mind made up. “Alright, if that's your decision. Which one do you want?” she asked and Apple Bloom pointed to a hat that was somewhere in the mix between my own and Applejack's.

The carny tossed it over and Apple Bloom proudly placed it on her head. Looking to me, she smiled brightly. “Now ah'm just like you and muh sister!” she said, something about her voice sounded... confident, proud... truly spirited.

Lassie called out, pointing over to a claw crane machine. “Cool, let's try that one!” she said, running over. We all followed her over and looked at the machine, a big title reading 'Winner every time!'. It was the basic claw crane game, were one operated the claw with a joystick then pressed the button to drop the claw and grab a prize. However, there were two cranes in separate areas, one with large prizes and one with small prizes.

It was only a single bit to play. I shrugged and gave each of the fillies, Spike and Lassie a bit. I offered a bit to Derpy but she politely declined. Each of them took a play and I quickly realized you only got one try at the big prizes before the game switched you over to the smaller prizes, which had unlimited attempts to get a prize. 'Ahhh... cheeky,' I thought to myself, now understanding what it meant by winner every time. However, despite the circumstances, Spike still managed to win himself a large dragon prize.

Walking along with a large assortment of stuffies, Derpy suddenly gasped and rushed over to another carny game. This one had milk cans set up on a table and several large baseballs laying around.

“Look!” Derpy said, pointing to a large stuffed muffin that had dopey eyes and a smiley face with it's tongue sticking out. “It's so cute!” she peeped. The carny walked over.

“Hey there mister, feel like winnin' a prize fer the little lady? All yah gotta do is get one of these here balls in the milk can. Simple. Five bits for five balls,” he told me. Derpy looked to me with big round puppy dog eyes.

“Please?” she asked. Who could say no to that? I dropped five bits on the table and in return recieved five baseballs and quickly came to realization with something. These weren't regular baseballs... they were bouncy balls in disguise... and the opening at the top of the milk can, while it was funneled, was about the size of the baseballs... heavily weighing the odds against me.

'Okay Burdy... simple, just lob it, higher arc, less range,' my conscious told me. 'Easier said than done,' I thought back. Stroking a hand through my hair, I took one of the balls and lobbed it, the ball missing completely. Getting my bearings in place I tossed another ball, this time it bounced off the rim of the can.

'Easy... slow breath... still hands,' my conscious said, a hand resting on my shoulder, another cupping my own hand. 'Like this,' he said and my body seemed to move on its own. The ball was lobbed a little higher than before but the arc was stubbier.

It bounced on the rim then went straight into the can. “HEY-HO! Look at that, we have a winner!” the carny called out for all to hear. Ponies looked over as Derpy grabbed me tight and hugged me affectionately, the carny taking down one of the muffin stuffies.

“Oh thank you so much, I love it!” Derpy said, nearly in tears from all her happiness. I smiled as our group started on again.

We stopped by another carny game and this time it was Spike whom wanted to stop. "Hey folks, take a throw and win a prize. It's that simple," he spoke out to us. We walked up and looked, the carny smiling. "Seeing as how yah'll seem tah be so good at winning, this one should be a sinch. All yah gotta do is knock all three of those stacked cans over, and off the plate. Five bits get yah three balls." Spike looked to me and I shrugged, giving the carny five bits.

Spike took a ball and hurled it, easily knocking over the cans. "Oooh tough break. Yah see kid, yah gotta also knock the cans off this plate," he commented and I looked to see the plate the cans rested on was rather large and made it seem largely unfair. None the less Spike seemed determined and tossed another ball, this time completely missing.

On his third throw however he cocked back his arm and threw hard, again missing the cans horribly. However the ball bounced off the back wall and came zooming back, striking the cans forwards and off the plate. The carny chuckled. "Well look at that. Alrighty kid, which prize do you want?" he asked. There were only two to choose from, a Celestia stuffy and a Luna stuffy.

"That one," he said, pointing to the Celestia one. The carny gave him his prize and we once again continued on our way. As we walked along I took notice of something. Aside from myself, everyone but Scootaloo had a large prize.

“Hey Scoots... choose a game, I'll win you something big,” I suggested and she looked back to me then rubbed her hoof in the dirt.

“I-it's o-okay. I really... really don't need anything,” she said, slightly timid about it. I just brushed it off.

“Anything you want, I'll win it,” I assured her and she perked up.

“Well... there... kinda is something-” I cut her short.

“Lead the way,” I told her and her face brightened up before she briskly led the way over to a big lit up tower. At the top of said tower was a bell. I knew exactly what this was.

An announcer spoke out through a set of speakers. “Hey, step right up 'n' test your strength. Show me, who among colts are true stallions?” the announcer said. It was getting pretty late. The sun had set and the moon was up, so the lighting on the tower really glowed and grabbed ponies' attention.

“It's really easy folks, just strike the lever with this here mallet, and get the puck to hit the bell. Do so and you win any of the prizes here. It's so easy, my assistant here can do it,” he told nearby ponies, directing their attention to a smaller framed pony who grasped the mallet in both front hooves and slammed the lever with it in an effortless way. The puck shot straight up and dinged the bell at the top of the tower.

“And for anypony who wins, we have a super duper prize. A limited edition Wonderbolt Rainbow Dash for the taking! Just five bits get you three tries!” Ponies quickly lined up, teen colts and a few young stallions wanting to show off for their mares. Scootaloo tugged on my pantleg.

“Can you win the Rainbow Dash for me? PleasepleasepleasepleasePLEASE?!” She asked, almost hyperventilating. I nodded and gave her an 'A-ok' hand gesture.

"This is right up my alley," I mentioned, stepping into line and watching the first few colts and stallions try, but even so, they usually fell just short, and in some cases didn't even get halfway. The crowd quickly grew dissatisfied with the game, some even complaining.

A grey stallion stepped up. I wasn't sure what exactly caught my eye about him but he just seemed... out of place. But even so, he paid his entry and grasped the hammer. Rather effortlessly, he swung and smacked the lever, the puck pinging the bell.

“Would you look at that folks, a winner!” the carny announced. Scootaloo dipped her head, but much to her relief, the grey stallion chose a different prize, grabbing a big lion instead. Once again ponies lined up to play the game and I rubbed my chin.

Whatever it was about that pony... just a hunch I suppose. I didn't like him. He gave off weird vibes.

Again ponies began to fail and after just four contestants I was up. “Woah hey, look at this guy folks. Real bodybuilder huh? Whatta yah say pops? Feel like winnin a prize fer the kids?” he asked. I handed him the five bits and from the corner of my good eye spotted him discretely pumping a pedal with his hind hoof.

Disregarding it, I remembered how easy it seemed for the two other ponies that won to strike the bell. Taking the mallet in one hand, I struck the lever but it only drove the puck a quarter of the way up the tower.

“See, you're supposed to hold it in both hooves mister,” he informed me. I grabbed the mallet in a tight grip and drove it down hard. The puck shot up but still only went half way. “Ooooh, tough break. But you still got one more try!” he informed me.

I began to get frustrated. How was it... that those two smaller ponies struck the bell so smoothly and with such ease? From the corner of my eye, I spotted the grey stallion near a storage tent. He looked both ways before tossing the big lion into the tent then fitted a blonde wig on his head and put on a shirt.

Bastards... my inner rage started to boil up. I flexed, my shoulders broadening out as my biceps tensed, veins bulging out. My grip around the mallet handle grew so fierce I thought my hands might start bleeding.

I took a wider stance, grunting deeply as my brows furrowed. “NGHHHH, GAHHHH!” I grunted, feeling my body start to shake a little. The carny rose a brow, wondering just exactly what was going on. My body tensed out to it's maximum capacity, I slowly began to raise the mallet.

“HGGGAHHHHH!” I groaned out excessively, my fuming anger starting to boil over. I felt as though there was another presence just behind. His hand again rested on my shoulder.

'That's it... let it flow through you, just like the blood flows through your veins. Let it enrich your body... and take complete control of you body and mind,' he told me. With the hammer cocked high above my head I let out a deafening roar, swinging down hard with unbelievable force.

It was mostly a hazy blur for me but I felt a stiff vibration jolt my arms from the violent strike of the mallet against the lever. In less than a second the puck shot up with such intensity that it blew the bell clean off, sparks of electricity flashing from the top of the busted tower and ponies gasped in shock and awe as the bell disappeared into the darkness of the night.

I gasped heavily as I gained my bearings, quickly noticing that the head of the mallet was shattered, along with the lever system. Small currents of blue electricity fizzled out along the ground. My hands felt tingly and I released the mallet handle, briefly catching a glimpse of dark blue electrical currents coursing around my palms.

I blinked and wiped my face, figuring it was just a visual impairment due to my outburst. I shook it off and looked to the carny, who was wide eyed and slack jawed, his eye twitching just ever so slightly.

“The... Rainbow Dash...” I said through a huff for air. He blinked a few more times before shaking himself out of disbelief.

“Would you look at that folks! A winner!... Another winner!” he said, grabbing the limited edition Rainbow Dash stuffy. Scootaloo came rushing up and jumped into my arms, giving me a thrilled hug.

“WOW! You're so cool Evan! You're the best, greatest guy ever!” she praised me. I gave her a nod and hugged her back, ponies clapping in the background.

I eventually set Scootaloo down and pointed to our group while giving her a few dozen bits. “Why don't you go with the others and order us all some ice cream... I'll just be a second... need to catch a breather,” I said. She nodded hastily, struggling to carry along the Dash stuffy that was bigger than she was... hell, it was almost bigger than I was.

I stood up and kicked aside the broken pieces of the lever, quickly finding what I was looking for. There was an air pump hook up to a small hydraulic of sorts... that thing he was pumping made the lever give off more resistance, making it harder to strike the bell. I knelt down and looked over my shoulder to the carny, who was talking to the crowd of ponies who had gathered from the spectacle. I grabbed the hydraulic and pump then stood up. The carny turned to me and began an appraisal, trying to con folks into playing, even though the game was obviously broken now.

“Hey buddy, that was awesome, good job!” the carny appraised as I walked towards the exit of the game, ponies still looking to me with impressed faces. I first looked to the ponies, then to the carny.

“Yeah... it was awesome, considering it was rigged.” I dropped the hydraulic between the group and the carny then made my way towards the ice cream stand where the others were, not once looking back. As I walked away, I could hear the voices of severely displeased and irritated ponies, mostly the former contestants.

Meeting up with my group, I saw that they had all gotten ice-cream cones with chocolate dip. We all began to walk along, tired for the most part. It was now pretty late, being nearly ten o'clock.

We all took a seat and ate our ice-creams, the kids starting to yawn every so often. With the night basking down dim illumination, a lot of the rides had their lights glowing and flashing. Derpy looked out to fair with a content sigh. “Wow... look at that one...” she said in a quiet tone. I followed her gaze to the Ferris Wheel.

“Well... come on then. Last ride of the night, whatta yah say?” I suggested and she nodded. We all walked towards the giant wheel ride and paid admission. The cabins we rode in were like little cups with seats and a canopy, but ever the less, it would hold all of us.

We left our stuffies at the gate of the ride and the attendant chuckled. “Last riders of the night. No one else is on the ride. Enjoy yourselves,” he mentioned. We got into the cabin and took our seats, the attendant closing the door and locking it before starting the ride. We began a slow and peaceful ascent, a soft tune playing on the speakers. Lassie laid down on the floor of the cabin between Derpy and myself.

Spike sat beside Derpy, whom was across from me. Leaning his head back, the dragon's eyes fluttered shut even before we had gotten half way to the top. The three fillies leaned against me, Sweetie Belle leaning against my left shoulder, Apple Bloom against my right and Scootaloo slipping under my right arm and nestling her head on my leg.

All three quickly passed out. I lifted my arms slightly and took them all into a loving embrace as I sat there, leaning my head back. Resting my eye for a moment, I opened it to see Derpy looking at me.

I blinked, then looked down, going from side to side with my view as I looked to the three fillies under my arms that were passed out and nestled against me. I looked back to her with a faint smile tugging at the side of my lip.

She smiled back, almost giggling. We sat in silence as the ride kept going at a snailish pace, but it was really nice. We could see off into the far distance. The lights of Ponyville glittered and simmered.

The faint smile grew slightly larger as I closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment. I had been through so much, and my body had the scars to prove it. I used to love the action... the violence. The death defying adventures. Maybe it was to keep all my bottled up emotions suppressed. Maybe it was to take my mind off my inner turmoil... whatever it was...

The soft music continued to play, Scootaloo shifting slightly and stirring in her sleep. Derpy's eyes seemed to beam as she smiled at me. I smiled back with a content sigh. The action... the adventures... as much as I used to long for them...

My arms rested against the fillies that lay against me as I leaned my head back and let out a deep sigh. Almost too soon the ride came to an end. Regretfully I had to wake the fillies. Even so, they were in no way to walk.

In turn, Lassie put Spike on her back and began to carry him along. Derpy took Apple Bloom. Scootaloo hopped up onto my back and I carried Sweetie Belle in my arms. I asked the attendant to wait a moment and watch the stuffies, and that I'd return shortly there after to retrieve them.

Walking out, I helped Derpy and Lassie load the young ones into the truck before racing back and retrieving the toys. Running back, I loaded the toys into the box before hopping into the driver seat.

For just a moment, I rested my face against the steering wheel. “Thank you Cadance... for how little you've done... it's gone a very long way,” I told her before keying the ignition and driving us all to the Apple Family Farm.

I parked the truck out front and once again we carried the young ones, this time to their resting place. Lassie tucked Spike in on the couch before crashing on the spot, curling up just beside the couch.

Derpy and I carried the fillies up to their room. We set them down, individually tucking in each one and stroking their mane before wishing them a good night's sleep. Leaving the room I let out a deep yawn. “Oh man... what-a-day...” I said through another yawn. Derpy nodded as we reached Applejack's room, Derpy's temporary residence.

She turned to me and smiled with a blush. “Thank you. For taking me to the fair... for winning me that muffin. For everything,” she mentioned and I just brushed it off.

“Bah... it's nothing Derpy. I should thank you. Today wouldn't have been as much fun without you,” I replied. She slowly rose to her hindlegs and embraced me in a gingerly hug. I felt her soft lips press against my cheek, followed by a whispered thank you, before she dropped back to all fours and entered her room.

“Night Derpy,” I whispered to her before heading downstairs. Walking out to the porch, I removed my hat and took a seat with a deep exhale. In the distance I could hear the howls of wolves, calling to each other... a family.

I set my hat aside and listened to the melody as my eyes closed. Even so, I drew out Belladonna, just in case. As beautiful as wolves were, they were still dangerous...

* * *

I felt my heart thumping... my world hazy... every heart beat thumped in my head like a gong. In my hands was a thick chunk of metal that glowed brightly... my light in the darkness. The holy engravings illuminating the area around me...

Suddenly however, my nightmare was stopped by a flashing white light. In frantic panic I drew my handgun. “We mean you no harm, Mr. Burdick.” The voice seemed... regal... empowered... yet, soft and gentle all at the same time.

The light simmered slightly and Luna came into view. I lowered my stance with a sense of curiosity. I wasn't sure what I was dreaming about... but it had me on edge. Derreck's presence suddenly appeared beside me.

“Your highness.” He took a slight curtsy bow which she returned. Walking forwards, she stopped a few feet away from us.

“Greetings,” she offered me comfort in her words and I holstered my Desert Eagle. “We... have a request,” she began and Derreck nodded. “Our sister... she used to try to persuade us to invade your dreams, and find what had made thou so... disturbed in life, so distant. However, in our recollection of your dreams we found... sunshine, and rainbows... happiness. Things that would never torment a soul to such isolation. We feel as though we have... lost something, when looking into your dreams. As though... it was erased, pasted over. We request, if thou would be so humble, as to enlighten us to the true reality,” she asked, in a rather formal way that didn't seem demanding.

“Well...” Derreck began. “I made a promise to somepony. A promise that I wouldn't let you remember... our dreams... they're beyond what most ponies can fathom. However, Luna... if you so wish, I can grant you just a glimpse,” he offered.

“If thou would be so kind. We have had restless days and nights in which we wondered...”

She trailed off as the setting around us changed. The ground seemed to tremble beneath us as explosive eruptions went off in the distance along with the thunder of thousands, upon thousands of gunshots. Tanks rumbled past us as the three of us stood idle.

Planes buzzed overhead, mounted machine guns rattling wildly. Thousands of Soviet troops charged forwards, rifles and submachine guns chattering, their noise seconded only to their battle roar. Luna's jaw nearly dropped as she looked to the hellish scene around us. Dead men lay scattered all over the place, some wearing different uniforms than other. Several tanks, both of Russian and German origin, lay burning in the fields that was once a fertile land.

A nearby forest burned ablaze, dark smoke rising into the air. She nearly got choked up on a gasp and the dream quickly came to an end.

“W-why?” she asked and Derreck shrugged.

“Politicians I suppose. Together... we all went through years of that during my dreams. It left a traumatizing mark mentally on you. A... friend, removed those painful memories so that you would no longer remain so traumatized. Now... perhaps you understand why,” Derreck said and she nodded, embracing him in a gentle hug.

“One more thing... before we go,” she turned to me. “She is much like you...”

I didn't quite catch on but I started to fade from my dream world...

* * *

I awoke suddenly, something triggering a sharp awakening. I looked around and spotted Scootaloo, nearly in tears. “S-S-S-Scoots?” I stammered and she sucked back a sob.

“I... I... I... I'm sorry, I ruined it. The day was so perfect, and it was going so well... and I ruined it,” she nearly wept. I walked over and knelt down, a strange odor making my nose twitch.

“Woah, woah, woah. Calm down. What's wrong?” I asked and she looked away.

“I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to. I just couldn't... I just couldn't wake up,” she nearly cried.

“What... I don't... what happened?” I asked.

She bit her lip then sniffled. “I... I wet the bed...” she wept. I blinked then scratched my ear.

“Uhm... what?” I asked, a little confused about what had her so distraught, but she seemed to become more upset and distressed.

“I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to. I swear. It just... I just couldn't wake up!” she cried.

“Wait... hold on... what's wrong. What exactly is so bad that you're crying?” I asked and she stifled a sob.

“I wet the bed!” she cried and I just shrugged.

“Okay... so? I'll just wash the sheets and mattress. No big deal,” I replied and she gave me a somewhat shocked face.

“Y-you're not... mad? You don't think I'm dumb or a little bed-wetter?” she asked and I shook my head.

“Nah. It's cool... I mean... well, it's not particularly awesome... or something to be proud about... but so what? It happens. We're all different. Whether it be heavy sleeper or weak bladder. I used to wet the bed until I was like... I dunno, thirteen, maybe fourteen,” I informd her and her eyes went wide.

“Really?” she asked in a shocked way and again I just shrugged.

“Well... yeah," I replied, a little uncomfortable about it. "Like I said, we're all different and it's nothing to be ashamed of,” I told her then stood up. “Come on, I'll wash you up then put the sheets in to wash,” I offered walking her upstairs and to the tub.

I quickly washed her down and helped dry her off before putting her sheets into the washing machine and tossing her mattress outside, figuring I'd just wash it in the morning. “Come on... I think you could sleep in Big Mac's bed,” I suggested.

I led her to the red stallion's room and helped her into bed. “Alright... good night Scootaloo,” I said as I tucked her in. She grabbed my arm.

“Can you sleep with me?... It'll make me feel safer,” she asked and I nodded with an exhale.

“Alright... alright sure,” I said as I laid down next to her. She curled up against my chest and snuggled into me. I sighed to myself and tucked my left arm under my head for support as my right arm curled around her. “Alright...” I trailed off and fell back to sleep...

My sleep felt short however and I was awoken to a shaken voice that seemed almost... terrified. “E-Evan?”...

Author's Note

Yeah, sorry 'bout the wait. I almost had it done last weekend but I ended up going to Wonderland with my Niece and Nephew (Figured I'd make sure you guys and gals knew that so you didn't think I had kids in real life, then writing about boning a pony with mommy issues) anyway, it gave me ideas to rewrite the chapter so... it took a little longer. It is my niece and nephew and their mom, not my kids and my wife, serious.

Chapter 59

'Not your everyday pony...'

I slowly cracked my good eye open with a groggy groan. “Th-th-the... there's something outside...” whimpered a voice that I could only distinguish as being Sweetie Belle's. I leaned my body up, stirring Scootaloo's body whom was nestled up against me.

“Huh... what I-” my voice was cut off by a shriek down the hall. The shriek was enough to not only make Scootaloo jump out of her dreams, but make me jump out of bed and rush down the hallway, past the two youngsters at my doorway.

Plowing into Mac's room, where the scream had come from, I first spotted a figure hidden under a blanket, no doubt Derpy seeing as how she was no longer on the bed. The second realization however made me shiver. There was a face, one hidden in the darkness, peering through the window with slanted yellow eyes that glowed... like something straight out of a horror book.

My initial shock of fear passed in less than a heartbeat and I charged forwards, the creature moving away. I yanked open the window and looked to the roof where it had been perched. “HEY! HEY GET BACK HERE!” I yelled down to the creature as it landed on the ground.

I rushed back out and into the hallway, leaping over the stairway railing and slamming down into the floor, losing my footing and crashing onto my side. Just as I rose to my full height, I spotted Lassie. “Come with me, NOW!” I ordered, the two of us rushing out the back door.

“OVER THERE!” Lassie barked, pointing to the bipedal, and rather lanky, creature that still had its features hidden by the darkness.

“Chase him around front, I'll go the other way and cut him off!” I yelled, quickly rushing around the other way. I could hear Lassie barking and snarling savagely as she rushed wildly after the intruder.

In seconds I had rushed around to the front of the house, Lassie beating me by just a moment's time but we both ended up meeting face to face without even so much as a good glimpse of our... whatever I should call it.

“Wha... b-b-but... I was-” Lassie began to sputter but was cut off as we heard hoofsteps, or perhaps footsteps, on top of the roof, knocking loose a few shingles. We both looked up to see the shadowy figure rushing for the top edge of the building. We ran after him but were completely mind blown as he managed to leap an almost impossible distance, landing in some tall grass far out in the field.

I grunted as he slithered off, but by goddess and thunder I wasn't gonna let this guy get away without answers. I rushed back to Cadance, Lassie at my side, quickly grabbing two random firearms. Taking Violet for myself, I tossed Lassie the lever action rifle that her, Derpy and myself had painted over.

“Protect the kids!” I yelled, grabbing a handful of shells and blindly rushing off into the tall grass and after the beast. My senses kicked into high gear. The... “Ugh!” I gagged. The stench that creature let off was aweful. I thumbed the few shells I had into the Boito 590 clone and racked the slide.

“COME ON YOU BITCH! COME OUT!” I yelled, starting to breath heavier as panic began to set in. I had only grabbed a mere four shells... what if that wasn't enough?

Another shiver went down my back as I heard a hiss nearby, almost a gurgle in a way. I spun, only now realizing this grass was up to my chest. For all I knew it could be slithering along through the grass, about to suck me under.

My grip tightened on my shotgun, almost to the point I thought I may break the pistol grip. My breath was shaky and stuttery. However, in my panic my senses kicked into an even higher gear and I almost seemed to pick out his spot in the tall grass, as if he were outlined by his own stench.

I began to wildly charge forwards and he... or she, seemed to know I was coming with deadly intent. The creature stood taller than me, a good two feet taller, as it ran through the grass and into the tall stalks of corn.

I chased after him without so much as a second thought. I was gonna get this bastard. He was gonna be six feet under. I thrashed my way into the corn, barely able to see in the darkness of the night.

I didn't follow my senses, I didn't even acknowledge even my vision. I suppose I was half on the thought I was just gonna bump into him in an open area on the opposite side of the corn field and plug him.

Charging out, I skidded to a stop in a pathway that traveled between the cornfield. My world began to spin as I starting doing 360 motions, looking around in anger, fright, confusion, hatred... everything was starting to overwhelm me so suddenly that I nearly passed out.

Stopping, I wobbled a bit and held a sturdy grip on my shotgun. I looked down the long path between the cornfield. Another shiver going down my back. It was though I could see a mirror in front of me... Like I was looking at myself in reverse... behind me...

My brows furrowed and I let out a roar as I spun on my heels. My trigger discipline was sloppy however and it really showed when the shotgun went off prematurely, blowing up dirt and rubble a few yards in front of the creature, which screeched and rushed off into the corn stalks once again. In my haste and panic, I racked the shotgun and fired again, then a third time, each shell of magnum buckshot shredding down more than a dozen stalks of corn.

However just as I went to trigger the gun a forth time, my hand twitched subconsciously, as though a natural instinct. I quickly got my bearings and realized that would not only be my last shot, but would more than likely hit nothing but corn.

I was shaking, nearly hyperventilating. I heard rustling and pivoted just a little too late as a lumbering mass bouldered into me, knocking us both to the ground. “GAH! I'M GONNA...” I trailed off as the other groaned. “D-Derreck?!” I gasped and he quickly rose to his feet, yanking me up with him.

“Better give that to me. It ain't no Minigun there Mac Eliot,” he mentioned, the pun calming me slightly and his presence here putting me at ease. With him around, regardless of ammo count... I felt the safest I could given the situation.

He took the gun and shouldered it, his trigger finger resting outside the trigger guard in a professional show of trigger discipline. “Follow me, and stay close,” he whispered, slowly stalking through the cornfield with me close behind.

After only minutes he stopped. “What the...” he brushed aside some corn and we looked out to a small expanse of openness in the cornfield. “Fuck...” he swore under his breath. Smack dab in front of us lay a perfect circular depression of the corn.

“Wha... crop circles?” I asked, my voice stuttering slightly.

“Can't be... those were debunked as just a bunch of loony farmers dicking around to get famous...” Derreck stepped forwards then froze. He turned back to me. “The kids! COME ON!” He yelled, tossing the shotgun to me.

I charged after him, not exactly sure what had him so startled all of a sudden. Lassie had a gun. And we hadn't heard a thing... Oh shit. After all those gunshots they should have at least called out to see if I was okay.

“FUCK!” I roared out, fearing for the immediate safety of the others. I charged as fast as my legs could take me and quickly burst out from the cornfield, through the tall grass and towards the farmhouse. “LASSIE! DERPY! KIDS!” I cried out, charging through the front doors.

Lassie was standing there, Daisy drawn and leveled at me. “SHIT!” I gasped as I dropped to the floor, Lassie gasping in shock from my sudden entrance. I looked up to see all their frightened faces.

I dropped the shotgun and rushed over, pulling the three fillies and Spike into a hug. “Oh goddess... oh please tell me you're okay,” I panted. I could feel them shivering in fright. I held them tighter, brushing each one of their manes and planting a kiss on their foreheads.

I looked to Lassie. “Drag down some blankets and pillows... we're all sleeping in the living room until morning. Then I'll sort this all out in the daylight,” I told her. She nodded and quickly rushed upstairs.

It was then I noticed I had left Derreck behind, without a gun. I rushed out the door and yelled out for my comrade, my voice echoing but I got no answer. A shiver went down my back... he couldn't... no... no he'd be fine... he'd have to be...

“I should...” I trailed off, looking to the others. Would it do me any good to even go looking for him in the darkness. I hadn't heard him roar in distress, or yell out for me to stop... hell, he had given me the shotgun.

I looked to the others and gave them a calming hand gesture. “I'm just going to my truck...” I trialed off and crept out to grab a few more shells to top up the gun, then rushed back to the safety of the home.

Lassie had dragged down a large quantity of blankets, pillows and cushions. I locked the front door and proceeded to the living room where everyone was hunkering down. “What now?” Lassie asked as I moved to the front window.

“You all try to get some sleep. I'll keep watch,” I replied in a very monotone voice. I kept the shotgun held in one hand, barrel pointed upwards to the roof as I stood rigid like a solid statue. In a brief moment, I felt as though the moon's gleam reflected off my bad eye, despite it being covered, and gave it a glimmering shine.

I shook it off as nothing and put on a deathly serious face. Whomever had played this sick... prank, or whatever it was, had really messed with the wrong family...

* * *

Third person...

Derpy jerked awake from her dream, vivid memories of the recent occurrence still fresh in her mind. Her heart kept pounding at a rapid pace as she shivered fearfully, looking around to the dark surrounding of the living room.

She, along with the others had passed out soon after Burdy took watch. She looked to the one source of illumination in the room, the window. Moonlight shone through the large window and basked its gleaming beams across the room, creating some rather spooky shadows. However, even with the events that had recently occurred along with the shadows, there was one thing that set her at ease. By the window stood a lone figure, still as could be. Their guardian of sorts. Never in her life had she felt so afraid yet so safe.

Next to her Scootaloo stirred in her sleep, obviously suffering a nightmare. The older grey pegasus nestled up with the filly whom quickly settled and began to doze peacefully. Derpy smiled faintly and rested her head back on her front hooves before dozing off...

* * *

Burdy's perspective...

I wasn't tired... I couldn't be. But... I felt as though I was dreaming. One moment I was looking out to the empty darkness of the Apple Family Farm, then I'd blink and everything would be in flames. One moment, fine and beautiful. The next, everything was turned to ash, the building ready to collapse.

I shook my head and took another look. I let out a sigh. Just as I thought. Nothing was wrong, aside from our midnight creeper. I let out another sigh as I closed my eyes for just a moment.

I felt wet, muddy... cold...

My body was laying flat. Without much warning my body was pulled up and out of the cold, wet ground. Long muzzle flashed erupted in the distance, along with several that were closer towards us. Gunshots cracked in the air like thunder in the night, each muzzle flash like a strike of lightning.

Snow covered the freezing ground but beneath it was still mucky, due to the tens of thousands of men that stormed across it. A younger looking man dressed with a black shirt and white pants yanked me along, muzzle loader in hand. We past men firing muzzle loaders into the oncoming mass of soldiers dressed in blue.

Many of the soldiers in blue looked frozen to the bone, malnourished and rather low on esteem. The man whom had pulled me along let out a ferocious roar, one I could not hear but simply felt.

The man I followed charged forwards valiantly, lead balls zooming past us as we charged the French soldiers of Napoleon's Grand Armée. 'How do I know who these guys are?' I asked myself as my body seemed to simply follow the man in front of me.

A French officer riding a horse fired his rifle, the lead ball slamming the man in front of me square in the chest. He winced, clenching his eyes shut as he still charged forwards, snarling like a wild beast.

He man in black clad leapt forwards, the bayonet of his rifle leading the way as he soared across a seemingly impossible gap with a single leap, tackling the French officer off his horse and impaling him with the bayonet. With the officer pinned beneath him, the Russian man fired his rifle, the gun killing the other almost instantly.

My friend yanked the rifle from the deceased corpse, now using it as a club and battering nearby enemy soldiers. Charging forwards with his club, myself following close behind, he suddenly hesitated for just a moment as a cannon went off, the ball striking him square in the chest and hurling him back, slamming his body into mine.

We were slammed into the crumbling wall of a building I had no idea was there. Our rifles, one now seeming to form in my hands, changed drastically, now bolt action repeating rifles. Men, our comrades, now charged forwards through the mucky streets of a nearly desecrated village.

There was a rapid flashing down the street coming from a dug in position. My close comrade and I charged out into the street, bullets whizzing by our bodies, volleys spitting out of the gun at a speed I would've never thought possible.

Bullets shredded through my friend, quickly tattering his uniform but ever still he charged forwards valiantly. The men in the dug out hole screamed as their water cooled machinegun fired.

My bullet riddled comrade leapt into the pit with the two enemies, impaling one with his bayonet rifle and backhanding the second with enough force that it broke the man's neck. I leapt into the trench just as my comrade was heaving the machinegun in the opposite direction, towards our enemies. The gun had a large cylindrical component around the barrel, giving it some obvious weight. Taking aim from the hip my friend let loose with his new firearm, chopping down our aggressors.

I looked in a state of near horror as the man's body shuttered from the recoil of the gun, empty shell casing littering the ground around his feet. His brows furrowed, his face slowly gaining more definition than before.

The atmosphere slowly changed and I looked back out to the battlefield where my friend and now fellow revolutionary fired his machinegun at our former brothers in arms that scattered the city streets.

Men, once our most trusted allies, now enemies, fell into pools of their own blood. It almost made me sick to my stomach. The machinegun in my friend's burly hands ceased to fire. He merely dropped the gun and began to charge forwards, roaring wildly. I followed behind, my own brows furrowing as I snarled.

Gunshots tore through both myself and my friend but didn't seem to deter us in the slightest. Charging right into the thick of it, we beat down two men and retrieved their rifles, using them against our enemies. Bullets shredded our clothing, along with our bodies but it didn't seem to bother us as we seemed to... almost regenerate, new skin healing over wounds in a matter of seconds, possibly less.

Wounds that would be considered fatal, mere bug bites to us. We charged on, slaughtering down enemy troops as we came across them. Impaling one certain soldier, my friend stopped as we both looked to the rifle the man had dropped. It wasn't Russian issue... it was British.

We heard a most unfamiliar noise and we both looked in awe as a tracked beast came to a halt just a few dozen yards away and directed it's main armament on us. The cannon shot blasted us to the side, hurling our bodies through a decrepit building wall.

I barely managed to lift my head, blood dripping down my face. My body was yanked to my feet by a now defined man. His facial features were no longer young. They were hardened, by ages of war and killing. Heavy scars littered his face. His eyes were polluted with death and hatred as he jammed a long rifle into my hands, one fitted with a scope.

We crawled over to a window and peered below to where a monstrous looking tank rained death down on our fellow Soviet comrades who charged uselessly towards the enemy line behind it. With an angry twitch of my face I shouldered the rifle. Looking through the scope I placed the aim piece on a German whom operated the turret mounted machinegun atop the tank.

With a fluid squeeze of the trigger my rifle boomed, the man's body getting jerked back before his body lifelessly slumped forwards. Without so much as a word my big friend leapt from the window, crashing down many floors below yet landing gracefully in a crouched stance.

His eyes looked upon the ruthless enemy soldiers that had devastated our country. With a vicous snarl he pulled a grenade from his dark trench coat, one that had several M24 grenade heads wired together to one single stick grenade. He surged forwards at increasing speeds, enemy soldiers taking aim on him. With his free hand he drew his Russian handgun, firing off wild shots at the enemy as he closed in on the Tiger tank.

Leaping the final distance, he yanked open the tank's hatch, several gunshots tearing into him yet barely fazing him. Yanking on the detonation pull cord, my friend dropped the bundle grenade down the hatch and slammed it shut, putting his foot over the hatch.

I could see from the constant motion in his legs that men were trying to escape the tank's interior but a sudden jolt in my friend's entire body told me the grenade had went off, undoubtedly killing all the occupants.

However even so he was still being targeted by entrenched enemies behind the tank. My friend leapt up onto the hatch, taking hold of the MG34 and turning it against its former owners. The gun chattered in his hands, each rapid gunshot now slowed in my mind. Every shot, every muzzle flash illuminating his facial features, scared by centuries of war and death.

His eyes, full of fueled hatred and pure rage, seemed to gleam with every shot from the German machinegun. A most sinister smile began to creep across his face as he chewed down dozens upon dozens of men in mere seconds.

The machinegun slowly changed to that of Russian origin, as did the tank that lay burning beneath him. Dozens of robed rebel soldiers ambushed our position. Derreck seemed to relish in the moment, the big gun shaking his entire body as it went off.

The heavy DShK machinegun nearly tore men in half as it chewed apart the ambushing force, forcing them into a retreat.

Derreck hopped down from the tank, lighting up a thick cigar and taking a puff. He took notice of an officer shooting out the knees of a man trying to escape with a child. A T55 battle tank rolled forwards towards the crippled man and his child at the order of the officer, the driver peeking up through the hatch to get a look at the ensuing carnage.

Derreck and I rushed forwards, Derreck yanking on the officer's shoulder but the officer just shoved him away, yelling something I couldn't make out. The tank continued to roll forwards and without so much as even slight hesitation Derreck drew his aging WWII handgun and shot the officer straight through the side of the head, then directed a shot through the skull of the tank driver.

Men rushed over, weapons drawn and ready, aimed in his direction. I rushed into the scene, giving a harsh backhand to a soldier that sent him off his feet as I put my back to Derreck's. My bulky comrade let out a deafening roar that made the nearby soldiers deter in fear.

I dropped my rifle, cocking back my right hand as I joined in on the roar. I felt a nearly unbearable pain shoot through my arm as my wrist bones felt as though they were dislocating. Something sharp, something pointy... began emerging through the skin between my knuckles...

I jerked, heart thumping. I looked around in shock, fearing the worst. In moments I realized, it was just another horrid nightmare. Yet even so, I must have slept standing upright because I was still in my posture I had been in when I was standing guard.

I let out a sigh as I dipped my head. Looking back out to the empty expanse of the night, I slowly removed my eye patch. Everything was a blur, as usual. I found myself looking to the moon and for a short instant something flashed through my vision. I couldn't tell what it was, but it startled me.

I quickly put my patch back on and resumed my duty. I looked to the darkness of the fields. Technically whomever it was hadn't done anything that would generally warrant death, but by goddess if I got my hands on him. I grumbled to myself as I thought about my promise I made to the others. “All night...”

* * *

Time dragged on and I even watched the entire sun rise. I felt the warmth of the morning sun raise the hair on my arm, a slight shiver going down my spine. One by one the others woke up. Derpy came to my side, my gaze still fixed on the open fields however. “Did you really stay up all night?” she asked but I didn't answer.

I ejected the shell from the chamber of Violet and loaded it back into the tube before slinging the gun across my back and looking to her. “Come on, we'll all go into town, and I'll get this mess sorted out.”

Scootaloo was still yawning and a bit groggy but nonetheless I got everyone to load into Cadance. In a serious demeanor I didn't bother playing around with my truck and drove us straight out to Ponyville, specifically to Tim Horseton's.

I looked to the others and handed Derpy a few Luna bits. “Get the kids some breakfast. Lassie, go with them,” I said and Derpy spoke up.

“You're not coming with us?” she asked.

“Get something for me too. I like my eggs over-easy. I'll meet you back at the farm, but I have to talk with Mayor Mare about this, find out who's the freak who pulled this prank.” Derpy and Lassie both nodded, my canine friend speaking up.

“If anything happens, I'll keep them safe,” she assured me and I nodded, giving her a pat on the shoulder. Not just man's best friend. As the others departed I headed to town square and to the mayor's office.

I parked Cadance out front and headed inside, looking to a secretary and asking for the mayor. She directed me to a door which I promptly went over to and knocked. “Come in,” came a reply. I entered with a look of grace, shutting the door behind me and giving a nod to the mare whom I had only met on brief occasions.

Taking my hat off I greeted her. “Howdy ma'am,” I offered her my hand which she promptly shook.

“Ahhh yes, you must be Mr. Burdick. I remember reading lots about you in the news a few months back. What can I do for you?” she asked as I took a seat. She poured a yellowish liquid into two cups. “Drink?” she asked but I shook my head.

“I try not to indulge,” I replied and she just laughed.

“Oh heaven's sakes no. This isn't liquor, merely apple cider. I wouldn't be caught dead drinking on the job,” she laughed pleasantly, to which I shrugged.

“Well, in that case, don't mind if I do. Thanks.” I took the glass of cider and downed it fairly quick. “Ahhh, that's damn fine cider,” I stated to which she chuckled.

“Indeed. So what exactly can I help you with Mr. Burdick?” she asked.

“Just Burdy, or Evan if you prefer formalities.” I licked my lips and savored the taste of the cider. “I'd like the authorities to apprehend a... it's hard to explain,” I stated and she gave me a wide eyed look.

“You... want the authorities to intervene with something?” she asked, almost in disbelief.

“Well yeah... see last night somepon... thing, scared the crap outta the fillies I was watching... and not just a simple, no harm kinda prank. It was pretty serious stuff. It even scared Derpy and myself. I'd just like them detained and questioned is all,” I stated and Mayor Mare just exhaled deeply.

“Well shoot... uhm... I uhh...” she seemed stumped. I rose a brow. “Well, truth be told Mr. Burdick... erm, Evan,” she stammered, quickly correcting herself. “You're quite possibly the closest thing Ponyville has to law enforcement, however forceful you are about it,” she said and I gave a shocked look.

“Me?!” I gasped and she nodded.

“Well... yes. Really, Ponyville has never needed any sort of law enforcement. The worst we have is a vagrant or rowdy delinquent. Whenever the Elements of Harmony are needed, it's generally a problem that threatens most of Equestria, not just Ponyville. Hay, you were the one to step in and stop Tristan-” I cut her short.

“And a rather terrible job I did at that,” I muttered, remembering how I failed to really stop him. He, to my knowledge, was still out there and at large.

“Well, not really. You freed the town of his tyranny,” she stated, as though it was a heroic act. I just sighed and got back on topic.

“Listen... I don't know where to go with this. Isn't there something, somepony you could call. A detective?” I asked.

“Well... I could call a private investigator but that may take a while...” she trailed off and I just sighed. “I'm sorry we can't do much more than that. Ponyville, aside from the odd rowdy traveler that passes through, is a rather peaceful little town. We've never had need for police or investigators,” she apologized but I just waved off her apology.

“It's alright. I'll look into it myself,” I replied. I stood up and shook her hoof once more before going to leave.

“If you ever need anything that I can assist you with, feel free to swing by,” she offered and I gave a nod before leaving. Heading back out to Cadance I took out Violet and unloaded the shotgun, putting her back into the toolbox.

Taking a seat inside the truck, I tried piecing things together from last night. That... that thing, whatever it was... it was fast. It could really move. I mean, I was a human and was generally slower than ponies but...

'Two legs,' my conscious spoke up and I rose a brow. 'It walked on two legs,' the voice in my head reminded me, my thoughts bringing up how it walked. “Yeah... yeah, how would a pony walk on two legs and go that fast?” I asked.

'Ponies don't run on two legs, they go fast on all fours' he replied and I bit my lip. I thought about how Mayor Mare said I should look into it, and how I was the closest thing to law this town had. Which made me remember how she brought up Tristan, which made me think about Trixie... which made me think about magic.

“What if... somepony cast a magic spell... say, either gave themselves a disguise... or create an illusion of a creature to make a bad prank?” I asked but my conscious didn't reply. I drove Cadance towards Trixie's stage. If anypony knew anything about that kind of magic, it'd be her. Well, or Twilight but she was away with the princesses.

I pulled Cadance up to the home of the stage magician. I went to leave but stopped for just a moment. I knew Trixie was a good pony, maybe a little arrogant and self centered, but a good pony. But irregardless, something made me grab Belladonna and holster her to my thigh.

'Detectives always carry a firearm,' my conscious spoke up. I walked up and gave a knock.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie will be with you in a moment!” came a voice from inside, making me chuckle slightly from her third person referral. Opening the door, her face turned to one of a smile. “Oh, Burdy! It's so nice to see you, come in, come in,” she offered. I took her offer and entered her dwelling, which was a little small for me.

“Here, let Trixie get you a seat,” she said, her horn glowing and pulling out a small chair for me. I gave a tip of my hat and took a seat.

“So Trixie, how are you?” I asked and Trixie smirked.

“Great and Powerful, as always!” she informed me in a powerful tone then giggled slightly. “Average,” she laughed and I chuckled. “How about you Burdy. Trixie wishes to know how you have been after your heart problems?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“I'll be fine. I'm tough as nails. But aside from that... I need to ask you something, or rather, I need your help,” I replied and she rose a brow.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie would be honored to help you in your... uhm, with what?” she asked.

“Last night I was foal sitting at the Apple Family residence and... something, scared the hay outta them... tell you the truth, it scared me a little too. It was... fast, really fast, like nothing I've ever seen before. It stood on two legs and... had nasty fangs,” I told her.

“It sounds like something from a horror story,” she stated and I nodded.

“Exactly. I have this... hunch, that maybe somepony was playing a sick joke. I know it wasn't you, but I need to know about the kind of magic required to do a stunt like that... and I figured, since you're the greatest and most powerful unicorn in all Equestria-” Trixie cut me short with a giggle and a laugh, blushing a deep hue of red across her cheeks.

“Oh, you do Trixie too much honor,” she told me, covering her blush. I merely smirked.

“Anywho, I was wondering... what would it take for... say a unicorn to cast a spell to create the illusion of a scary creature, or a transformation spell to turn themselves into that creature?” I asked, Trixie biting her lip for a second.

“Transformation magic requires the highest level of power, only a few unicorns Trixie knows, that being only Trixie and Twilight Sparkle, know how to perform transformation spells,” she told me and I exhaled in thought, rubbing my chin.

“So probably not a transformation spell then, huh?” I asked.

“It would not be anypony in Ponyville, Trixie is sure of that,” she told me. I furrowed my brow in thought. “An illusion spell is quite easy, but to create something like what you descirbed may be slightly more difficult but still easily cast by more powerful unicorns,” she informed me. “However, why anypony in Ponyville would do such a thing is beyond me.”

I began rubbing my chin as I muttered to myself. “Damn thing was like a monster.” I continued rambling but Trixie spoke up to my remark.

“Perhaps, it was truly a creature. The Apple Family Farm is rather close to the Everfree Forest. Perhaps something wandered towards the farm?” she suggested. I rose a brow.

“Y-yeah... yeah that could be it,” I commented, thinking on how exactly I'd find out what it was. Then it snapped as my conscious spoke up.

'Zecora!' I stood up but wobbled a little, my head feeling faint and my whole body rather tired. “Burdy!” Trixie gasped, jumping up and supporting part of my weight. “Are you alright?” she asked and I nodded, still a little staggered.

“Just tired. Stayed up all night keeping watch,” I murmured through a yawn. She began to gently lead me further into her small home. I could feel her magic supporting most of my weight now as my legs started to give out from under me.

“Here, let Trixie help you,” she laid me down on a small bed. I felt drowsy, my eye barely able to stay open. Trixie brushed aside some of my hair.

“This time, I'll watch over you,” she said and it was really the last thing I remembered before passing out...

* * *

I awoke to the feeling of a cold damp cloth being being padded against my forehead. My vision blurred into view and I was bestowed by Trixie, whom was gingerly tending to my forehead with the damp cloth.

“Huh?” I murmured, getting a faint smile from Trixie.

“You were out for a few hours and started to squirm in your sleep. I thought this might help. Sleep well?” she asked and I nodded, feeling refreshed and better than ever.

“Y-yeah... great actually,” I replied and she smiled back. She wiped my forehead a few more times before putting it into a basin of water.

“In your sleep, you were saying things, talking about Zecora, Chrysalis, and someone named Derreck?” she asked and I merely nodded, though had no recollection of my sleep.

“Just reliving old memories,” I replied before standing up and getting my bearings together. Trixie stood up as well and I gave her a gingerly nod. Without much warning she embraced me in a tight hug.

“Be safe,” she said. I patted her on the back and nodded, though mostly to myself. I'd have to be. I made so many promises, and now it was time to make sure I kept them. With a departing farewell, I hopped back into Cadance and made my way to the Everfree Forest.

Pulling up to the edge of the forest, I quickly came to realization I had no idea how to get to her cottage. I could've asked Fluttershy, had she been here. “Dammit!” I grumbled, shutting Cadance down and hiding the keys in the sun visor like always.

Stepping out, I decided I'd have to find her myself. 'Should be easy to find. She's always cooking up concoctions. They have a... most distinguishable smell,' my conscious spoke up.

“And how would you know this?” I asked as I made my way to the toolbox, retrieving Nightshade, the Mossberg 590A1. I didn't get an answer and simply began walking into the Everfree, shotgun leading the way.

As I walked along I felt hopeless. Sure, her cottage was somewhere in here, but it could take me ages to actually find the damn...

I sniffed audibly, a rather strange aroma catching my attention. “Oh...” I trailed off, realizing that my conscious was indeed correct. 'Told you so,' he commented, making me grunt as I moved along through the thick foliage, following my senses that were going to no doubt lead me to the alchemist zebra that I hadn't seen in ages.

In minutes I found myself stumbling across her dwelling. “Well shit... that was easy,” I mentioned. A presence beside me startled the living hell outta me.

“Hopefully finding this creature will be just as easy,” Derreck mentioned.

“GAH! DERRECK! Why do you have to keep sneaking up on me like this?!” I gasped and he blinked.

“I saw your truck parked out by the Everfree Forest... figured you might need some help. Come on, let's go see if Zecora can tell us what that beast was,” he mentioned, having somehow come to the same conclusion as I that Zecora could help us with our mystery monster.

I knocked but got no answer. “Maybe she's not home...” I trailed off but Derreck simply opened the door anyway. “EH! Derreck you can't just...” I trailed off as I saw inside, Zecora standing behind a large cauldron, stirring the contents that were glowing green, the rest of the home filled with a dark eerie smog.

“The one from another world, whose mind was so twirled. Feel free to rest in my home, you needn't have to roam,” she spoke in her rhymes.

Derreck and I took a seat as she took a large spoon and filled some wooden cups. “Some tea for you, or perhaps two?” she asked. Derreck held up two fingers. She poured two cups for us and handed it over.

I looked and took a sniff. It smelt just like chamomile tea. “Uhh... what is it?” I asked, a little skeptical that it was actually tea. If it was in fact tea, was the spooky cauldron really necessary?

“From a herb in the ground, one that is easily found,” she said, her damn rhymes confusing the hell outta me. I was going to ask but saw that Derreck had already swailed his back and was licking his lips.

“Good stuff Z, best tea I've had in ages,” he praised and she returned his praise with a smile. I decided to take a gander and tipped back the beverage. Despite the spooky way Zecora was making it, the stuff was actually really good and I almost wanted more, but needed to get to the task at hand.

“Zecora, I uhh... I know it's been a while, but I need your help with something,” I said but before I could say much else she spoke again in rhyme.

“The beast from from last night, the one that gave you such fright,” she commented and I blinked.

“H-how did you...” I trailed off and still she spoke in complicated rhyme.

“I saw it too, it's presence simply won't do.” I scratched my head, struggling to figure out what she was getting at.

“Listen... Zecora, I know it's the way you talk and all... but for a few minutes, can you just... no rhymes? This is really important and I need to know everything,” I said. Derreck nudged me.

“Idiot. I can understand what she's rambling on about,” he chuckled, getting a sharp jab from me.

“I will do my best, to fulfill your request.” I sat back and sighed, knowing she couldn't help herself.

“This... this thing, what is it?” I asked.

“It's origin I do not know, but it's darkness continues to grow,” she rhymed and again I was lost. She saw my lost expression and did her best to explain. “I can feel it, sense its intentions, ones that are not pure. When heroes are faced, evil is erased,” she told me and I sighed once again, her expression going dire.

“I apologize. It is not easy for me to-” I cut her short.

“I know... it's who you are. I'm not trying to change you but... if this is serious, I don't really wanna be trying to piece together a riddle.”

She nodded and pointed to the forest. “Back to where it last was seen, to the pastures that are green,” she informed me. I gave her a nod, along with my thanks.

“You ever need help with something, just holler my name,” I said, to which she nodded.

Just before I left, she called out to me again. “Another tea? To help the mind be free?” she offered. I gave a nod, Derreck and I both taking a tea for the road.

We found our way out of the Everfree, quickly hopping in Cadance and heading back towards the cornfields and to where we last saw that damn creature. I parked near the tall grass and we approached the corn.

Keeping Nightshade handy, I walked through the tall grass and towards the corn. “Where'd this thing go?” I asked out loud, trying to figure out where it had entered the corn so we could try and find that crop circle.

Derreck began closely looking around then called me over. “Hey Evan, come check this out...” he trailed off in a monotone voice. I walked over and knelt down beside him. There were... paw prints in the ground. Paw prints didn't even fully define it, it was like nothing I had ever seen before. There were pad marks from the base of the creatures foot, or whatever it walked on, but rather than four claw marks like that of a wolf or nearly any other creature, there were two deep claw marks in front of the paw and one behind it.

Derreck spoke up. “This thing... it's got padded feet like a dog... but claws like that of an eagle or something... this is just fucked. Keep that shotgun loaded and ready,” he commented and I nodded, following him into the corn that stood higher than either of us.

Derreck followed the trail of prints, knocking over stalks as he continued along for a few minutes until we stumbled into the large crop circle, both of us gasping loudly at the sight of a large body laying near the middle.

The two of us charged over to the bovine that lay motionless but as we approached I gagged and nearly puked. It didn't smell, in fact it had no scent at all, not even smelling like a cow. It's face... half of the skin and meat was gone, leaving just bone. Part of the neck looked like it had been chewed off.

It's lower belly had been split open by a tool that was obviously very precise. There were no jagged marks in its wounds and was a clean cut. “Oh goddess...” I groaned and Derreck knelt down.

“It didn't rot...” he commented as he gave the front leg a little wiggle. “Body isn't rigid... flies aren't buzzing around it... no blood spilled... crows haven't started picking at it... Jesus Christ...” he whispered through a sharp breath as he stood up and put a cigar in his mouth, though not lighting it.

“Derreck... what the fuck is going on?” I asked and he swallowed hard.

“I dunno... let's get the truck. Drive it down one of the middle paths. We'll load it into the box and get rid of it. The fillies don't need to see this,” he told me as we headed back to my truck. He took my wrist and looked to my watch. “Mac is supposed to be home either late tonight or early tomorrow. We'll stay here tonight with the kids, then tomorrow we'll leave them with Mac and go get the royal guard,” he stated. “Shit... if only Luna was here,” he snarled.

I drove Cadance down the middle path that went through the cornfield and stopped near where we had found our way to the crop circle. “Just drive through. No way in hell I wanna drag that thing more than a few feet,” he commented. I puttered through the corn, knocking over dozens of stalks of corn before entering the large crop circle.

Both of our expressions went dire as we entered the field, puttering over to where the cow carcass was... used to be. “What the FUCK!” Derreck yelled as he hopped out of the truck and rushed over. I parked Cadance and stepped out. “It was right here... right fucking here...” he trailed off and looked around.

There were no drag marks. No signs of something dragging it away. “That thing still weighed at least 600lbs. Nothing could've come in here without us seeing it, tossed it over its shoulder then left before we arrived... what the fuck is going on?!” he snapped, chewing on his... MY Arnie cigar.

He walked over to my truck and shut the door then spoke to me through the window. “Just... get back to the farm. Leave. Go to Canterlot. Find somepony, anypony... get the royal guard.” He looked back to the field. “I'm gonna investigate some more, figure out what the hell is going on,” he told me and I quickly drove off, only now remembering I had told the kids and Derpy to head back to the farm after they were done with breakfast. How stupid I was. I should've told them to head back to the library.

I gunned it full throttle all the way back to the farmhouse, truck nearly hitting the yellow line as the engine reached high RPM. The turbo spooled and whirred louder than the engine, the truck bouncing along through the rough terrain as I raced back to the home. Hopping out, I left the truck running. Until now I hadn't realized how late it was, mostly because I had crashed at Trixie's. My day had been dragging quite a bit and it was now late afternoon, the sun getting ready to set.

I rushed through the front door, duster coat flapping about as I skidding into the home. “EVERYPONY?! DERPY?! LASSIE?!” I cried out but got no reply. “KIDS?!” Tears started to flow from my eyes, wetness dampening my eye patch.

I rushed around, yelling their names but finding nothing. Not a single sign of their presence. Luckily I didn't find signs of struggle either, nothing scattered about. I rushed outside and no sooner had I, heard a scream come from the direction of their clubhouse. My heart began to race as I charged in the general direction, shotgun in hand.

Racing along, I came to a grinding halt by their tree house, hearing more screaming. “KIDS!” I cried out. There was a long pause before I saw them casually look down at me from over the edge of the pool Derpy and Lassie had built.

“Hey Evan... we uhhh... we did get you a sandwich but Lassie ate it,” Sweetie Belle said.

“You snitch!” Lassie giggled playfully as she splashed some water at the young filly who screamed delightfully. Those were the screams... they were just playing in the pool... oh thank heavens...

“Come on! We gotta go, everypony!” I ordered and they all looked at me. “Can... just... now please!” I said, trying not to lose my composure.

“Where are we going?” Scootaloo asked curiously.

“Just, come on, hurry!” I said. They all sighed and hopped out, walking down. I tried to hurry them back to the house without having to explain what was happening. I didn't need to scare them, seeing as how they seemed pretty calm right now.

The truck was still running and I went to hustle them into it, But Sweetie Belle spoke up in protest. “Hey wait, shouldn't we dry off first? I'm soaked,” she stated. I didn't want to lose my cool but now wasn't really the time for dilly-dawdling.

“Uhh, yeah-yeah. Just uhh hurry, we're late,” I said, the group giving me a funny look. “Just uhh, don't worry about it, we'll make it in time no problem.” The others were obviously curious about my anxiety but said nothing.

As they went into the house I pulled Lassie aside. “There's... something,” I said and she rose a brow. “I... last night, I found a crop circle when I was chasing that thing. It's huge, it's in the cornfield. Then today... I uhh... found the corpse of a cow... it was... I don't know how to explain it but I left for just a few minutes to get my truck so I could go burry the carcass and... by the time I got back the cow was gone,” I said and Lassie gulped.

“So where are we going?” she asked.

“Canterlot. Royal guard. Lunar Guard... somepony in authority. Ponyville apparently doesn't have police or investigators,” I told her. We walked over to my truck, which was still running.

“What do you think it is?” Lassie asked and I could do nothing but shake my head in worry.

“I don't know, but Derreck is out looking for it.” I looked to the home and figured they might take a few minutes and that perhaps, despite the circumstances, I should act a little more calm. I turned off the truck and leaned Nightshade against the front fender.

Lassie spoke up. “So you think you can ki-” she was cut short by a scream from inside. I didn't even hesitate, nor did Lassie as we both rushed inside. There was another scream, coming from upstairs and the two of us were up the flight of stairs in a second flat. Charging down the hall we skidded to a halt near Mac's room. Everypony was on one side of the room, Derpy valiantly standing in front of the young ones in a protective pose, her wings spread wide.

On the other side of the room loomed a hideous creature that stood nearly eight feet tall. It's limbs were pretty thin but nonetheless it gave the bipedal beast a haunting appearance. It's face was pretty rounded, with a set of eight eyes, four on each side of it's face. The largest were the front two, each set of eyes afterwards being smaller than the last. It had dozens of razor sharp teeth, which were covered in drool. The beast dripped saliva from it's hissing mouth as it looked to my family like they were food.

I will admit, I was scared shitless, but I wouldn't freeze. I wouldn't let them down. I let out a horrifying roar that caught the beast's attention. It only managed a glimpse of me as I plowed it through the window, glass shattering around us as I plunged its body into the unforgiving ground, slamming my body down onto it.

However, despite my surprise attack on the creature, it quickly gained an advantage as it's arms cocked and booted into my chest, each fist fitted with three razor sharp talons that sent me hurtling into the exterior wall of the building.

Blood oozed down my chest and I tried to breath but found myself gagging on blood, both lungs having been punctured. I staggered to my feet as my healing factor kicked in, my wounds sealing shut. I spit out the globs of blood that resided in my lungs and looked to the creature with a deathly stare.

Something inside of me clicked, a burning, hellish fuming rage. My shoulders hunkered down a little and my body widened out before I let out a second deafening roar. The creature took a cautious step back before it's limbs reconstructed themselves into a quadruple arrangement, much like that of a dogs, before rushing off.

“YOU'RE NOT GETTING AWAY THIS TIME!” I boomed, rushing after the creature but screeching to a halt near my truck. I grabbed Nightshade and gripped her tightly as I rushed after the creature that seemed to be moving impossibly fast.

Everytime... every time I had failed in life, every memory of those moments resurfaced in my mind. All the times I hadn't been good enough. All the times she had disowned me for not measuring up to her standards.

I couldn't help myself but to go animalistic, beyond return. I had an insatiable urge, a need... a burning desire almost. I was going to pull this thing apart, limb from limb. I couldn't stop snarling as I chased after it, my legs feeling as though they were burning. A red misting fog seemed to emulate from each footstep I took as I gained incredible speed, speeds which could only be matched by elite pegasus fliers like Rainbow Dash, or The Wonderbolts.

In moments I was hot on the creature's tail, rushing wildly into the cornfield...

* * *

Third person...

Lassie rounded the others up. “Come on, let's... wait... wait where's Scootaloo?” she asked, doing a quick head count and realizing the young filly was missing. “SHIT! SCOOTALOO WHERE ARE YOU?” She screamed out, getting no response.

“She was just here a moment ago,” Derpy replied as Lassie began to frantically sniff the ground to find where Scootaloo had gone off to. The group began to frantically look for the missing pegasus.

Downstairs, in the pantry, Scootaloo tucked herself fearfully into a cupboard, closing the door and shivering uncontrollably...

The large man charged through the heavy stalks of corn, snarling and roaring as he pursued the creature. The beast raced out into the crop circle and tuned to face the hulking man, whom was nearly foaming at the mouth.

The creature's limbs once again reformed, turning back to that of a bipedal figure. The man leveled the shotgun on the creature but his finger deterred. Flicking the safety on, the man tossed the gun aside then took a defensive pose. “I'm gonna tear you apart... and beat you to death with the wet parts of you arms!” The man said, his body nearly shaking as he tensed. A powerful hellish red aura flashed around him briefly, his eye patch lifting off and revealing his eye.

His eye, once damaged, now sported a vertically slanted pupil and iris, colored the same demonic red as his aura that soon faded, but his eye kept the red tint. “Well how about it... feel like a little one on one?” he chuckled. The beast charged, as did the man. The two plummeted into each other, the creature taking vicious swings with it's razor talons while the man threw heavy punches.

Cocking back hard, the man hit the beast in the side of the head, a metal on flesh clink echoing out while the creature itself was hurtled across the ground from the sheer, raw kinetic force transmitted from the impact.

The beast was fast to its clawed feet and once again quarreling around the man who took a most casual stance, almost as though he no longer feared the beast. Rushing once more the beast began thrashing at him uncontrollably, but the man simply tilted his body side to side, leaning back at the odd time, all the while dodging the vicious onslaught.

Having had enough, the man shot both hands forwards, catching both the beast's palms with his own before twisting its wrists in a 180 degree motion then snapping them back, shattering the creature's wrist bones.

The beast howled in anguish as the man chuckled, pulling the howling creature forwards and slamming a hard knee into its gut, making it gag and spew out a mouthful of yellowish blood. In retaliation the beast chomped down on the man's neck, chewing off a large portion of flesh and shredding his jugular.

The man staggered back, blood squirting all over himself and his fine black duster coat. The beast snarled at him, fangs gleaming with his blood. The man rushed forwards, neck wound healing shut. Just as he went and leapt at the beast, it too leapt into the air, though straight up as to let the man pass harmlessly beneath it.

As he passed beneath it, the creature drove it's talon claws into his back, stomping him straight down into the ground. As the big man was crushed into the dirt the beast began stepping on him mercilessly, blood spilling everywhere from the fatal wounds it was inflicting on him.

Landing on the ground beside him the creature kicked him brutally, sending his body crashing a few dozen yards away. Leaping through the air the beast closed the distance and slammed down on his chest, once again lancing his body with it's razor sharp talon claws, piercing vital organ after vital organ several times.

With a bout of raging fury, the man swung his right hand to the side.

SNIKT!

Three razor sharp, dark blue, metallic bladeS emerged from between his knuckles, fuming with a dark blue mystic aura. “NGAHHHHHHH!” The man roared ferociously as he swung his fist, slicing off both the beast's legs in a blinding instant.

The creature began to screech and frolic, yellow blood pouring out of it's severed limbs. The big man stood up and retrieved his shotgun that lay nearby, all his fatal wounds sealing up. Slinging the shotgun across his back, the man walked over and drew out his fifty caliber hand cannon and lined up the sights with the beast's head, right between the eyes. Pulling out a thick wad of a cigar, he put it in his mouth as he prepared to execute the creature. He gave it a deathly finishing glare, his eyes both squinting, red eye flashing.

Just as he was squeezing back the trigger his body went rigid, stiffening up beyond belief. “NGHHHH!” He grunted, now at a loss of breath. A faint, sky blue aura coated his entire body and he was yet again stifled as he tried to yell and break free of whatever had ensnared his body. He was slowly levitated into the air against his will, mind quickly cutting out and going blank...

“Scootaloo!” Lassie screamed desperately, her ear flickering as she picked up a soft whimpering. Lassie rushed over to the cupboard and yanked it open, Scootaloo screaming in fright. “Scootaloo,” Lassie gasped and the filly looked to her, tears welting in her eyes.

“I'm... I'm scared,” she whined and Lassie nodded understandingly.

“Me too, me too. Come on, I'm getting you all out of here.” She picked up the young filly and put her over her shoulder, quickly leading the others out to the front door. Just as she swung the front door open, Apple Bloom screamed. The creature stood out front of the house, quickly noticing their presence and hissing.

Lassie slammed the door shut and latched the locks just as the beast came crashing towards it. “Back, back, BACK!” Lassie yelled, rushing the others back through the main hallway. She heard the smashing of glass, no doubt the front window as the beast entered the home.

Rushing back, she caught sight of the basement door and yanked it open, rushing the others down the staircase and closing the door behind her. Scurrying down the stairs they entered the dark basement and Lassie slammed the door behind herself but then began to fret as she found there was no lock to it.

Panicking, she pulled down several shelves and slammed them up against the door, wedging several things up against it in a hope to keep the creature out. The fillies and Spike whimpered fearfully and in her clumsiness, Derpy accidentally clipped the only lightbulb with her wing, smashing it and pitching the entire room black.

Scootaloo screamed, and just moments later the first door to the basement could be audibly heard getting shaken open, torn apart by the creature. “Everyone, sssh! Sssh! Just... quiet... quiet,” Lassie whispered as she felt her way through the dark, feeling around for the shelves and thankfully finding herself a twin set of flashlights.

Clicking them on, she turned the beams to the group, whom shivered fearfully. She gave them a gesture to try and be calm as she briskly hurried over and gave Derpy the other light. Leaning over, the canine whispered to the equine pegasus. “When that thing comes through the door... I'm going to distract it. Take the kids and run... don't look back, just run. Run as far as you can, then keep running,” she told her.

Derpy looked to the canine. “B-but... but what about-” she was cut off by a thud at the door, resulting in the screaming of the young ones. “What about you?” Derpy asked and Lassie just shook her head, a tear rolling down her cheek.

There was another thump, followed by a third before the scratching sound of claw on wood echoed in the basement room. Derpy and Lassie knelt down and huddled the young ones close, hugging them lovingly and trying to keep them from what was about to come through those doors.

All their hearts raced wildly but soon it stopped. Everything just went deathly quiet. Derpy and Lassie slowly let down their guard, their postures becoming slightly more casual despite still being deathly frightened.

Lassie and Derpy slowly hunkered down with the young ones huddled between them. Lassie looked around and spotted an old style radio, slowly creeping over and picking it up, bringing it back over to the group and dialing it in. “Figured... some music might help...” She turned it on, the radio playing an Equestrian tune that sounded as though it belonged in the fifties. Even so, it was soft and gentle, and helped put the group at ease despite the events that had unfolded...

Derpy awoke suddenly to a light beaming down on her. She awoke, her crisscrossed eyes looking around frantically. Lassie stood before her and it was then Derpy noticed the three fillies and the young dragon nestled up against her, passed out. She looked back up to Lassie. “I... found a box of spare lightbulbs...” Lassie mentioned quietly.

“How... how long was I asleep?” she asked, almost fretfully. Lassie swallowed hard.

“Uhm... a few hours I guess. I think... I think it's morning outside,” she informed her and it was then Derpy noticed the radio was no longer playing. “Batteries died an hour and a half ago. Batteries in the flashlights are a different size...” she trailed off. Derpy blinked.

“What... what do you think happened to Evan?” she asked but Lassie kept silent for a long while.

“I... I don't...” Lassie went quiet again as the two of them heard steps walking along on the floor above them, along with some grumbling. “Ssssh, sssh...” Lassie hushed the mare. The steps began to stomp around and pretty soon came barreling down the basement stairs.

“Wake the kids, get ready to run!” Lassie snarled towards the direction of the door, ready to give her life when the time came. Derpy stirred the kids from their sleep, all of them drowsy but were shocked awake when the door began to thump and rattle.

Derpy held the young ones back as Lassie stepped forwards and lowered her stance, lips curling back as she snarled wildly...

Author's Note

Yes I know, I'm a horrible procrastinator and I prolong these chapters longer than I should... I'm sorry. But hey, now you guys can see what I do on my spare time when not writing stories

Chapter 60

'When heroes are faced...'

Lassie's lips curled back, her teeth gleaming brightly as she got ready to charge. Her stomach sank, a knowing deep down inside that these would be the last few moments of her life, but by goddess she wasn't going to pansy out and leave the others to an untimely fate.

With tremendous brute force the door, and the barricade behind it, were booted down. Lassie charged but with only a split second to spare she ground herself to a stop, tripping over her front paws and tumbling into a bulky set of red hooves.

Looking up, she was met by two displeased sap green eyes staring down on her. Looking to the others he spoke in a gruff voice. “What in tarnation is going on?! Why in Equestria is the living room window smashed and why are there shingles knocked off the roof and...” McIntosh trailed off as he realized everypony's expression was one of absolute fear. “Wh-what... happened?” he asked in his usual gentle voice.

Looking back down to Lassie, their eyes met and the pooch smirked. “Uhm... by chance did you see the monster yet?...”

A short time passed and Mac led the others upstairs while Lassie did her best to explain the events over the past twenty-four hours. Mac looked to her with a dumbfounded expression. “A... monster?” he asked and she rolled her eyes.

“Of all the shi-” she cut herself off as she looked and realized there were young ones around. “Stuff, in Equestria, that, of all things, is what blows your mind? Seriously?” she asked and he swallowed, still unsure if he was going to believe that a monster was watching them and chasing them around.

“So... Applejack said she'd have Evan watch-” he was suddenly cut off by a deep gasp as Lassie heard her friend's name, having completely forgotten about how he hadn't returned the night before.

Racing outside and barking wildly, she howled his name but quickly squinted her eyes from the rising sun. “EVAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!” She cried out before howling again, not sensing his presence nearby. Her heart began to race and almost skipped beats as she began to fret. Big McIntosh paced up behind her and she spun, hopping to her hindlegs and shaking him by the shoulders.

“Quick! We gotta... we gotta get a search and rescue party and find him before.... before it...” she began to jitter and nearly hyperventilate. Mac put a hoof on her, stopping her vibrant movements.

“Relax-” he was quickly cut off as Lassie began to rush around in circles.

“Relax... RELAX?! How can I relax when he's missing and that... that thing is... IS!” She broke down and collapsed into a shaking heap. Mac blinked unsurely.

“Well... I mean he is... THE most terrifying thing ah have ever met-” he was again cut off by the panicking dog.

“Not anymore! He used to be yeah! He was strong, athletic, powerful, hot headed... but now's he's an iced tea sipping old man!” she cried out before biting her lip so hard she tasted blood.

Mac looked back to the house, more specifically to the busted window. Taking a fine look at it, he then peered to the roof, where there were shingles missing. Squinting his eyes he noticed claw marks, almost as though a gryphon had its way with the family home's roof.

Looking around he also noticed claw marks in the ground but nothing else out of the ordinary. “So... where did they go?” he asked but Lassie merely whimpered and pointed out to the fields.

Mac took a curious few steps towards the fields, a suspicious feeling arising inside of him about the cornfields themselves. Lassie was quick to bark at him. “Don't go out there! Just... just don't... go...” she whispered, the others now coming out of the house and standing on the porch, watching fearfully as Lassie broke down.

Mac gulped down and filled himself with a deep courage he rarely had to use. “Ah... ah gotta see fer muhself,” he stated and Lassie chewed on her lip.

“WAIT... Just... if you're gonna... just wait,” she was panting heavily, trying to force courage into herself before rushing to the truck and grabbing Daisy, thumbing a few round nosed shells into the levergun. She waved to the group and herded them over.

The canine began to fretfully think to herself, not wanting to leave the group behind, but not wanting the red stallion to meet the same fate as her friend. “Just... Derpy, take the kids in the truck and...” she trailed off, realizing the mare didn't know how to operate Cadance, nor did she want her trying to get back to town without escort. “Just hide in the barn, we'll be right back, five minutes, if not... run as fast as you can back to town,” she said, the words of Evan to her playing back in her mind. Now she sounded like him when he was in her position. 'Ohhh DAMMIT!' she swore internally as the grey pegasus rushed the little ones into the barn.

“Okay Mac... you wanna play curiosity kills the stupid stallion... five minutes, that's all I'm giving you... after that, we're coming back... even if I have to make you,” she told him, levering a shell into the chamber. “I've got the nose... I can lead you to where they last were... but five minutes, then we head back, no matter how close you think we are,” she told him and he nodded. The dog brisky began to lead the stallion into the thick grass and towards the cornfields.

Lassie's nose twitched as she followed the scent of the two, one her friend, the other...

Walking on her hindlegs was a chore to say the least, but carrying the gun while pacing along was a whole other story. Her breathing was heavy, deep and raspy. Tears trickled from her eyes, dampening her fur as vivid memories of the creature returned.

She thought to herself about what she'd give to have Evan be here and as brutal and ruthless as he used to be, or as brutal and ruthless as the stories told about him were. 'Able to take on dozens of Timberwolves and walk away clean. Hell, I'd even take Celestia or Luna, but goddess forbid they have to be out of country on some diplomatic mission or something.' Lassie's thoughts were kept to herself as she led McIntosh through the deep jungle of corn, a lot of it knocked down already, making the trail easier to track. 'Able to fight anything that confronted him and come out on top... just disappeared into the cornfields, never to be seen again...'

“Goddess... it stinks,” Mac mentioned and Lassie just huffed.

“You're telling me,” she responded, her sense of smell over double his own.

“How close?” he asked and her nose twitched again.

“It's old scent, last night's. I can't be for certain how-” she cut herself off as they pushed aside some corn stalks and were greeted to the sight of a wide expanse of flattened land. “Far...” Lassie finished.

Mac looked with wide eyes, his mouth slightly ajar. “Sweet Celestia...” he whispered and Lassie nodded. She began to sweat more vastly, beads of perspiration rolling off her damp fur. Her grip on the rifle tightened slightly.

She stayed silent for a moment, her expression going to one of silent fear. Mac went to step forwards but Lassie put Daisy's barrel flat across his chest, blocking his way. “What? It hasn't been-” Lassie cut him short.

“No...” Lassie trailed off, raising the barrel of the gun to the distance. “We can't continue...” she trailed off, her eyes looking blankly to the continuation of the corn across the large crop circle.

“Why not?” Mac asked, followed by a gulp.

“Because we're being hunted...” she trailed off before looking back to Mac. “Back to the house... Run! NOW!” Lassie barked, the two of them scurrying as fast as their legs would take them, Lassie struggling slightly as she hauled along the levergun. From behind them Lassie, with her inept canine senses, could hear something thrashing through the corn stalks, chasing after them. “Faster Mac, FASTER!” Lassie howled.

As they exited the cornfields and scampered through the tall grass, neither dared a glance back as they pushed themselves beyond their own limitations to try and reach the presumed safety of the Apple Family residence.

As they approached the yard, the Lassie screamed out to the others hiding in the barn. “GET IN THE HOSUE!” She yelped. It only took a few brief seconds for the others to emerge from their hiding spots and scatter towards the home. Lassie dared a glance over her shoulder, spotting the bipedal creature zooming through the tall grass.

Her facial expression became one of true fear as she scampered along just behind Mac, not wanting to leave him behind to an untimely fate. The group charged in through the front door and Lassie skidded to a halt, pivoting on her hindlegs and slamming the front door before locking the deadbolt shut.

There was a spine shivering screech from outside that made Lassie stumble back just as an impact hit the door, followed by the sound of sharp talons clawing against the thick wood.

“Out the back door! We gotta get to the truck!” Lassie commented, knowing it was their best bet for an escape. The group rushed down the main hallway of the home and to the back kitchen door but halted to a grinding stop as Sweetie Belle screamed out in fear, the beast now at the backside of the home but seemingly startled by their presence as it turned to them, intrigued to see them but still shocked to see them.

Lassie dropped the rifle and charged for the door just as the beast did. With her advantage in starting first she got a foothold on the door but the beast pushed back with great force, almost knocking Lassie to her back.

Big Mac joined in Lassie's efforts in pushing on the door, both of them grunting and wincing in force to try and keep the monster out. The beast made headway in its advance as its arm snuck into the opening, reaching around and thrashing about. The tip of one of its claws nipped Lassie across the cheek, gashing open a small wound that began to spill blood.

Lassie cried out in effort, knowing that, despite Mac's strength, the beast was winning this battle. From the corner of her eye she spotted a butcher knife laying on the counter just beside the door.

In a test of luck she quickly reached out, doing her best to dodge the creature's flailing claws. Gripping the sickly knife she slashed at its wrists, the beast screeching and immediately withdrawing its arm.

With the sudden drawback of force from the creature, Mac and Lassie gained the advantage they needed and shut the door, locking it shut and backpedaling. Lassie scooped up her rifle and leveled it, waiting for the creature to come through the door. Instead it kept scratching and clawing at the wood, never again beating on the door.

Derpy spoke up in a petrified voice. “Wh-what is it doing?” she asked fearfully. Lassie swallowed hard before answering.

“They seem to have trouble with doors,” she replied. Not a moment after she said that the creature moved to the kitchen window, the fillies and Spike screaming loudly. Daisy's sights were up in a flash and Lassie began to trigger rounds down range. However, in her extreme haste, and after just four rounds, she short stroked the lever and jammed the gun.

The window was shot out and smashed. Lassie swore she had hit the beast but didn't take any chances to look, dropping the jammed gun and rushing the others back into the hallway. Daisy lay flat across the floor, the firing block slightly open with a round jammed in the receiver, the rim of the shell facing the open world, the primer struck.

“Out the front!” she hollered, a screech echoing down the hallway. Looking over her shoulder she spotted the creature climbing through the busted window, a bloody wound in its shoulder, courtesy of the 30-30 levergun.

In frantic action Lassie purposefully knocked several pots and pans onto the floor, along with several cooking utensils as she hurried the others away.

Rushing to the front door Lassie yanked on it, having forgotten she locked it in her state of rushed thinking. However she did remember the large front window was smashed out. “Out the living room window!” she ordered, figuring it would be faster.

The group ran into the living room but came to an abrupt halt as they stood face to face with the creature which was already present, but seeming as though they had startled it, almost as if it hadn't been expecting them there. The wound on its shoulder was also no longer present.

However, even with the sudden startle, the creature took no time in leaping at them. Even despite its blinding speed, McIntosh was not going to let harm come to his sister. Wheeling around, he pounded the beast in the chest with a brutal bucking kick that sent it crashing back into the wall opposite of them.

Just as he was settling his hindlegs back to ground level, the creature leapt once again, landing on his back as he steadied himself from the kick. In a valiant show of friendship Lassie tackled the creature off of the big red stallion, nipping at its neck.

With a swat it knocked Lassie back, though it only managed to get to its knees before Mac brutally booted it across the room. Its body ricocheted off the wall and tumbled into the living space of the other room.

“OUT THE WINDOW!” Lassie yelled, the group not needing to be told twice. They all rushed out, leaping through the opening and scurrying towards the truck.

However, just before they could even get within ten feet of their escape, it returned, leaping from behind them and landing a few yards in front of the group, coming to a skidding stop and hissing viciously at them.

Without looking back, Lassie began to push the group back from whence they came, only to have the fillies scream and push back at her. Stopping, the canine looked over her shoulder to see there was a second, slowly pacing towards them.

'Shit... they hunt in packs!' she thought to herself as she bit her lip, the two things slowly making their way towards them, like predators about to pounce, lowering their stances in preparation to leap.

Just as the group began to think all was lost a lone gunshot went off, dirt kicking up in front of the thing by Cadance. Another two shots spewed dirt in front of the second. Three more shots went off but didn't strike a target, instead being volleyed into the air.

There was a moment of silence, where everything stood still. Lassie blinked, slowly turning her head left and right, taking in the area's surroundings but not finding the origin of the gunshots.

With her inept hearing however, she picked up the sound of spurs spinning, making an audible jingling. Looking up to the roof, she spotted a western clad figure, a smoking gun in hand.

Tilting the barrel upwards, the figure blew the smoke away from the barrel before opening the cylinder and dumping the six spent gold casings onto the roof, the shells tumbling down off the slope and to the ground below as the figure used a speed loader to quickly reload the shining revolver in a flash.

Snapping the cylinder closed the figure holstered the piece before leaping down, the duster coat flaps flailing freely as the clad figure dropped gracefully, landing in a crouched position and keeping their face from sight with the brim of their hat.

Slowly standing up the figure approached ever so calmly, with a steely cold presence about them. One of the creatures went to move but the figure opened the duster, revealing the glinting revolver, an action which was enough to halt the beast's movement for the time being. “Mmm... quick learner huh?” asked a very feminine voice. A gust of wind blew past, fluttering the duster coat and revealing a very feminine buxom build.

Underneath the duster was a set of black cargo pants and a rather plain tank top that left nothing to the imagination. Their attention drawn to the woman, she tipped the brim of her hat upwards, revealing her facial features.

“So... how's bout it?” she asked in a challenging tone, the creatures not even getting a chance to flinch as she drew faster than a heart could beat. With the 629's double action mechanism, all she had to do was squeeze the trigger over and over, rotating every shot between the two targets and pumping each one with three heavy .44 magnum rounds, kicking them off their clawed feet and just a few feet back.

Using her right hand to shoot, her left hand was crossed above her wrist, giving off the illusion that she was fanning the hammer, when in fact she was merely triggering off the gun in blinding succession.

In less than two seconds it was over, the two creatures laying lifeless on the ground and the group standing in utter silence, not sure how to take the situation. The woman paused for just a moment before standing and twirling the revolver around her index finger before promptly trying to holster it. However she accidentally holstered it the wrong way, the grip reversed. She used her middle finger to twist it into the proper position and finally achieved holstering the firearm before giving her full attention to the group.

“So...” she began but the group gasped in fear and took a step back. “Really? I save your life and that's how you react? Treating me like I'm-” she was cut off by a screech, making her pivot on her cowboy boot heels.

There before her stood a third, though this one was far different. It had several scars littered across it's pale skin, but what was most different was its legs. No longer biological, its legs had been replaced with cybernetics, which it used to slowly approach.

Kianna drew out her revolver and yanked on the trigger, an audible CLICK echoing through the now silent air. With a gasp she pulled twice more, each accompanied by another CLICK. The beast grinned a toothy smile, its slimy razor sharp teeth dripping.

With the tables turned, Kianna took a cautious step back as the creature stepped towards her but no sooner had it done so a thunderous gunshot went off, a large spew of dirt getting kicked up just in front of the creature's cybernetic feet. Stepping back, the expression across everyone's face, even that of the creature, was one of complete shock. Only a moment past before their was an eruption of chugging automatic fire and the creature was ripped to pieces and blown apart by heavy projectiles.

Blinking, Lassie looked around and spotted yet another figure taking residence on the roof, this one also dressed in western fatigue, though he wielded a massive single barrel machinegun, a short belt of large shells attached to the gun.

Slinging the belt of ammo over his shoulder, the man heaved the big gun up to hip level then slid down the roof's slope, taking a leap and attempting a graceful landing much like Kianna performed earlier.

However, much to his regret, as the man landed he threw out his back, yelping in pain as he crashed brutally into the ground, his gun bouncing to the side as the others, minus the woman, rushed to his aid.

Derpy was the first to arrive, rolling him to his back and pleading for him to be okay. “Ah-ha-ha...” Evan chuckled painfully. “Me? I should be... ugh... asking if you're alright...” he grunted, painfully standing to his full height and trying to stretch out his back. “Guess ah ain't so young anymore... ugh... gonna feel that for a week,” he grunted, his voice raspy and old. The three fillies rushed into an embrace, making him grunt yet again as his pain flared up from the sudden impact of their embrace.

Kneeling down rather painfully, he held the fillies, along with Spike, in a hug that lasted a few seconds before it was interrupted by a slow clapping. “Bravo... bravo...” Kianna chuckled sarcastically and Evan simply looked back to the roof.

“It looked and seemed like a pretty cool idea... guess ah can't keep up with you youngsters no more,” he chuckled, turning his attention to the others and asking if they were all okay. Standing up, he again stretched out his back before Kianna spoke up.

“Hey, I uhh... just wanted to say thanks,” she commented and the man rose a brow.

“I should be thanking you. If you hadn't showed up when you did... I was just a minute or two away when I heard the shots,” he mentioned and she chuckled.

“Well... truth be told I wasn't coming her to save them. I just came her to give you this-” she cut herself off as she drew out a MK. 23 SOCOM and leveled the sights on the man, everyone going still.

She then spun the gun and gripped it so the handle was facing Evan. “Take it. As a thank you for saving my squad back in Canterlot. This was the gun you had... seems fitting...” The man took the piece and ejected the magazine, which was empty. He then racked the slide to see it didn't even have a single shell of ammuntion.

“No bullets... was gonna ask why you didn't just use this when you revolver stopped,” he commented and Kianna nodded, looking down to her holstered magnum.

“Yeah it-” Evan cut her short before she could continue.

“Six shots... that gun only holds six shots. It may be a powerhouse, but you have to get used to only having six shots. With high capacity handguns out there, especially magazine fed ones, revolvers are a hard firearm to become effective with...” he trailed off and she nodded before looking to his big gun.

“What is that thing? It looks like an old M2 but with an M1919A4s pistol grip back plate,” she commented, the man just shrugging.

“You wouldn't believe me if I told you,” he mentioned and she rose a brow.

“Try me.”

“I was abducted by aliens, broke out, and when a group and I beat said aliens, one of the guys offered to trade me his gun for the captain's sidearm... something about how he had a friend that would want it... dunno,” he state and she scoffed.

“Sure, sure. I'm so sure that's happened.” Evan just shrugged.

“Told you,” he chuckled and she merely tipped her hat before departing but as she left, she turned back to speak once more.

“This doesn't mean I like you.” After that she didn't turn back once. Evan looked down to the new firearm he received and simply smirked. Thumbing the slide release, the gun made a CHINK! sound as the slide snapped shut and the man pointed it forwards with a smile.

“Just like old times!” Stuffing it away, he turned to the others and walked up to Mac. “I'm sorry I wasn't here. There were... complications,” the man apologized and Mac let out a deep exhale from the breath he didn't know he had been holding.

“Eeyup,” he said, rather quietly...

* * *

Evan's perspective,

Monday, September 8th, 2014...

So, aside from the whole alien ordeal, things went very well while the others were away. In the end we all decided to forget about it and not make a large deal out of the situation, since it had been dealt with in a way. I'm sure the fillies and Spike, even maybe Mac and myself, would be forever slightly traumatized by the events, but at least no one got hurt... no one that deserved to get hurt.

Twilight and the others had returned home and life was getting back to normal... or as normal as could be for me. I still tend to struggle from time to time, trying to settle into a normal lifestyle. It's so different from the way I used to live...

I felt a tugging on my leg. “Come on, come on! Get up, it's almost time for school!” chimed a cute young little voice.

I simply rolled over in the bed that was much to small for me. “Hey! Aren't you listening?! Don't fall back to sleep!” chirped the voice.

“Ughhhhhhhh...” I groaned out. The shaking on my leg continued. “Just five more minutes...” I pleaded and there was a set of giggles. I rolled over and onto my back, having previously been laying face down to avoid the shine of light bulbs that now blinded me.

Looking to my watch, I saw that it was 8:03am. “It's too early to be getting up,” I mentioned with a playful whine, Rainbow Dash chuckling.

“And you work for Applejack how?” she teased, Scootaloo pulling on my leg again.

“Come on, I don't wanna be late for the first day of school. You promised!” she mentioned and I nodded.

“I know... I know... it's just sooooo comfy in bed though!” I fooled around, pretending I was going to fall back asleep. Scootaloo had requested that I, along with Rainbow Dash, walk her to school the first day... just because.

“Hey! I'm supposed to say that!” she giggled, trying to shake me awake. In a blitz of movement I spun around and heaved her up in my arms.

“GAHHHH, GOTCHA!” I played, making her squeal in frightful delight as she was lifted into the air. I set her back down and stretched out with a yawn, Scootaloo speaking up once more.

“What's wrong with your underwear?” she asked, pointing out to my raging morning wood that made a large tent in my boxers.

“UGH! It's uhh... my underwear is just...” I trailed off and rearranged my boxers so that it was less protrusive. “Just all shuffled up from rolling in my sleep,” I chuckled nervously. “Hey uhh... why don't you go get your stuff together and uhh... we'll head out,” I offered but she spoke up.

“But I haven't eaten breakfast yet,” Scootaloo replied back and I shrugged.

“Tell yah what, after I get changed we'll head out and I'll buy you breakfast at say... Tim Horseton's?” I offered and her wings sprang out.

“Wow really?! You're the greatest!” she chimed, jumping into me and hugging me tightly, making me feel uncomfortable due to my boner which she was partially brushing up against. As lovingly and gently as I could, I pushed her away.

“Come on, or we'll be late for school,” I told her and she nodded quickly, zooming off to get her things. Beside me, Dash began to snicker.

“Shuffled up?” she laughed and I just groaned.

“Shut up...” I whispered uncomfortably. “You don't know what it's like. Why did I even agree to stay with you guys last night? I should've came here this morning.” I hurried to the washroom, scooping up my clothes as I went along.

Dash apparently lived in the clouds but this was a small place she got so that Scootaloo always had a place to stay with her... or something, I didn't quite get the full story. Slipping on my daily attire, I washed myself just a little before heading out to tackle the day's tasks... whatever the later ones might be.

I walked out of the bathroom to see that Scootaloo and Dash were already waiting at the door for me. I offered to carry Scootaloo's things but she declined, stating that she could handle it and that she was a big filly now.

Walking along with the others, we made our way through Ponyville, the smell of fresh morning air still lingering. We made our way to the fast food breakfast joint where the every friendly cashier was still working.

“Mornin' Mary,” I greeted, the mare waving.

“Morning Evan, what can I getcha?” she asked brightly. I pointed to Scootaloo.

“Whatever she wants,” I replied and Scootaloo looked to me.

“Whatever I want?” she asked and I nodded. She looked to the trays behind the glass and oogled the pastries. “Ooooh... can I have that one?” she asked, pointing to one of the doughnuts... "oh and one of those too... and that one over there?” she asked, Mary hurrying to keep up with the sweet toothed young filly.

With her assortment of doughnuts chosen she also ordered a chocolate milk. Dash rose a brow to the amount of doughnuts Scootaloo had ordered but I just shrugged it off. “Dash... what do you want?” I asked and she began to shake her head.

“Oh no, I'm goo-” I cut her short.

“Apple cider for the mare,” I offered and Dash just sighed.

“I gotta fly laps with the Wonderbolts today... I really shouldn't-” she cut herself short as Mary presented a cup of hot cider on the counter. “Buuuuuuut, one surely couldn't hurt."

Mary looked to me. “Just a hot chocolate,” I ordered and she nodded, prepping one up then typing the order into the cash register.

“Okay, that'll be eighty-three bits...” she trailed off, seeming unsure but Dash spoke up before she did.

“What?! No way, that's so-” I cut her short as I tossed a Luna bit on the counter, to which Mary promptly took. “I... bu... what?” Dash asked in disbelief, knowing as well as I did our order would never have come to that absurd price... but I didn't much care.

“Keep the change Mary, and have a good day,” I replied, giving a wave to the mare as we left. Dash nudged me as we walked along.

“You're terrible with money,” she commented and I nodded.

“So?” I asked and she just sighed deeply. Looking to Scootaloo, I chuckled as her cheeks puffed like a chipmunk's while she scoffed down some doughnuts.

“Enough treats?” I joked and she swallowed hard, downing the doughnut completely.

“Well, actually I got an apple fritter for Apple Bloom, she likes those ones. And I got one of these ones for Sweetie Belle cause she thinks they're pretty,” she said, pointing to a glittery looking sprinkle doughnut. “And I got a doughnut for Rumble too cause he likes the chocolate-” Dash cut in.

“You know Scootaloo... I think Evan mean just get one for-” I cut her short.

“However many you wanted... I think that's what I said.” I smiled and Dash again just sighed, dipping her head and shaking it. Even so I could see a smile creeping across her lips. We made our way to the schoolhouse where we stood and waited for only a few minutes before Ms. Cheerilee opened the doors.

Dash and I hugged Scootaloo before I rubbed her mane, frazzling it slightly. Dash spoke up as she gave the filly a nod. “Have a good first day in school.” Scootaloo nodded before heading off, calling back to us.

“I will,” she called back, waving as she entered the school. Cheerilee looked to me and smiled with a timid blush, giving me a wave. I gave a gentle wave back before the mare shut the door, beginning the first school day of the year.

Dash patted me on the shoulder. “You know... you're a good guy Evan. Scootaloo really likes you... and uhh... I think you'll be a good dad,” she said, making me raise an eyebrow.

“I will?” I asked, since it seemed she was so certain I was one hundred percent going to become a father at some point.

“Uhh... well... I mean... yeah cause... uhm, I gotta fly. See yah around yah big lug.” With that she took off without so much as another word. I shrugged and just stood there for a few more minutes, sipping my still scorching hot chocolate.

As I stood there, I got this feeling that... well, I wasn't sure how to explain it. It just felt as though something was off. Not in the way that there was a world ending event amiss or that somepony was just killed... but something was definitely out of place. From behind me came a voice.

“Mr. Burdick, we need to have a little talk...”

Author's Note

"I remember when you first arrived... you were always wondering if you could trust this world. But now the tables are turned and I'm not sure if the world can trust you," Celestia told me.///

Yeah, so there's a little snippet from the next chapter, just to keep you all hooked... ahem, anywho... OH GODDESS YES! I have waited literally forever, literally since I started writing, to drop that line, and you all know the one I'm talking about... my Fimfiction Avatar says it all. Anywho, I didn't ever know how I was gonna drop the catchphrase but I wanted it to be... you know, that magic. And who better to do it than Lassie?
Cheers!

Chapter 62

'What is love?...'

Desert garage...

Flim scurried about, scowering some papers together while Flam jammed a suitcase with some basic tropical clothing.

“I can't believe it! I can't believe it! I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY LET HIM GO!” Flim wailed in panic, rumors having spread like wild fire about Burdy's pardon due to Celestia's intervening. Flam forced the suitcase shut, the case itself bulging and parts of shirts still sticking out the seams of the case.

Flam grabbed a set of schematics and blueprints, ones for those of various firearms and ammunition types. “We should have never let that woman talk us into this! Why... why... darn it! Darn it all Flim! We messed up. We messed up big this time!” Flam cried out, a deep sense of fear twisting his guts and making his stomach sink.

Flim rolled up some more plans then turned to his brother. “This is all your fault. If you hadn't-” but Flam cut him short.

“MY FAULT! Why... why you were the one that agreed to the meeting with her. If you hadn't even begun to speak to her and-” but this time Flim cut in.

“HA! Hardly. If you had've just contacted Burdy, then he could've taken care of that crazy lady during the meeting and she wouldn't have suspected a thing!” Flim spat and his brother gasped.

“ME, CONTACT HIM! You should have contacted him, it was your idea to begin with!” Flam snapped back.

“MY IDEA! It was yours!” Flim screamed.

“Was not!” Flam countered back.

“Was too!” Flim retorted. The two butted heads briefly before taking wild swings at each other, alas, their hits were feeble and looked more like two children flailing their arms at one another.

“Ahem...” I coughed, gaining their attention. They both went deathly silent, going pale in the face and turning to me, myself still standing in the doorway.

The sun was setting in the horizon now, the last beacons of hazy orange light pouring in through the doorway, casting my shadow across the old, sacked garage's interior. My features were shadowed, and somewhat concealed by a pair of sunglasses that went atop my eye patch.

I had once again dawned the skull shirt and black pants. I took a step forwards and the two gasped, pitifully cowering backwards and dropping all their belongings.

I took another step and they backed themselves into the wall. “Burdy...” Flam gasped and I held up my index finger, twitching it from side to side.

“Ah-ah-ahh... no.” I closed my finger and clenched a fist. “My friends are the only ones who get to call me Burdy,” I stated before pointing to him. “You call me...” I trailed off and pulled the mirror tint aviators from my face. “Derreck.”

The two gasped in fright as they stared upon my scarred face. The cascading orange haze continued to cast my shadow upon them as I took another step forwards, making them cringe in further fear.

Flam dared to speak up. “Ahhh... heh-heh... Derreck, we were just coming to rescue you-” I cut him short in a bout of anger.

“No you weren't Flam! No-you-weren't. You two conniving pricks tried to throw me to the wolves!” I yelled and Flim cried out in response.

“No-no! It's not like that, we swear! Kianna forced us to do what we did!” he tried to plea.

“Horseshit! FUCKING HORSESHIT! That's all horseshit and we all know it. You were never forced to do anything. You deliberately sold me out in favor of someone else and now that I'm on top you're grovelling before me!” I shouted, making them wince. Flam began to say something.

“No-no, Burdy it's-” but I quickly cut him short.

“IT'S DERRECK!” I boomed.

“Der-Derreck! Derreck! It's not like that, we swear!” Flam cried.

“What do I look like to you?” I asked the mustached pony. He had stuttered breath before managing to speak.

“Wh-what?” he asked, terrified beyond belief.

“What... do I look like... to you?” I asked, taking a few more steps forwards.

“W-w-wha-wh-what?” he stammered and I began to lose my patience.

“What country are you from?!”

“What?” he asked back.

“What ain't no country I ever heard of. They speak English in What?” I asked.

“What?” he asked back in total fear.

“ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER. LIKE THE WORDS THAT ARE COMING FROM MY MOUTH... DO-YOU-SPEAK-IT!” I boomed.

“Yes!” Flam wailed in tears.

“Then you know what I'm saying?” He nodded. “Then describe what I look like!” I shouted.

“What?” he gasped again and I drew out the HK MK23, leveling the sights on his head.

“Say what again! SAY-WHAT-AGAIN! I dare you, I DOUBLE DARE YOU MOTHER FUCKER! SAY WHAT ONE MORE GODDESS DAMNED TIME!”

“I-I-I...” Flam looked to me, his eyes tearing up. “You're huge!... Muscular!...”

“Go on...” I encouraged him.

“Prolific... terrifying...” Flam wailed.

“Do I look like a bitch?” I asked and his eyes went wide with confusion from the question.

“What?” he gasped and I shot out a window with the .45ACP pistol, making the two scream in horrified fright.

“DO-I-LOOK... LIKE-A-BITCH?!” I roared.

“NO!” The two screamed in unison.

“Then why'd you try to fuck me like a bitch?” I asked in a more calm tone.

“We never did!” Flam cried.

“Yes you did Flam! YES-YOU-DID! You walced into the court room, bent me over in front of all those ponies, all my friends, and all my family, and tried to fuck me like-a-bitch!” I stepped right into his face and he tried to cower back but was up against the wall, so he and his brother merely cowered down to the floor, curling into a fetal position as they whimpered in fright. Flim actually ended up letting go and pissing himself, a puddle of urine now beneath him.

“No, no we didn't,” Flim whimpered, nearly a whisper.

“Yes you did Flim... yes, you did,” I whispered back. “And I don't like getting fucked by nothing but mares... cause I ain't no ass stabbing faggot... got it?” I asked with a risen brow. They nodded, both whimpering.

“Now, stand up,” I ordered and they both looked to me. “I SAID STAND UP MOTHER FUCKER!” I boomed into their faces and they both scurried to their hooves. “Now... I used to like you... both of you... to the point I might have been a fudge packer for you two. But not anymore... BUT... I'm willing to let you make it up to me,” I told them, their lips quivering with fear.

I led them over to a table and laid out a picture for them. “Back on my world... they called this a Gran Torino, specifically it was a 1974 model, though 1973 to 76 were nearly identical. Not as prolific as the Chevelle SS or Charger, but just as fast... and that's saying something for a car that was so heavy, especially with a 460 big block,” I told them and Flim cut in.

“B-b-but wha... why are you telling us this?” he asked, fearful to say what.

“Because... for you to regain my trust. I want you to build me one. I know that petrol isn't really a resource in this world but I'm sure you two can figure out how to configure a diesel motor for speed... right?” I asked and Flam spoke before his brother could intervene.

“Y-y-yes! Yes of course we can! We can do it. We'll prove to you this was all just a big misunderstanding. We never meant for this to happen,” he stammered and I smiled, patting him on the shoulder as he stood on his hindlegs, front hooves on the table as he observed the photo.

“Well... I gotta fly. Don't try to run... or I will find you... and I will kill you,” I told him and he shook his head.

“We'd never think of it!” Flam stated and I rubbed his shoulder affectionately.

“Of course you wouldn't... you guys love me too much...” I said, my hand slowly stroking down his back, still affectionately rubbing him. As I got lower I noticed his tail start to rise and smirked.

“And I love you just as much,” I stated, giving his flank a loving pat, making his buttocks tighten. My smile quickly turned into a frown of hatred as my fist clenched and with only an inch of space, drove a hard fist into the base of his spine.

Time seemed to slow as Flam's eyes went wide with shock, a spew of saliva coming from his mouth as he gasped in both pain and shock, a CRUNCH emitting from the strike. Flam's hindlegs crumpled beneath him and he crashed to the floor, time returning to normal as he wailed out in pain, his upper body flailing but his lower stationary for the most part.

“My legs! MY LEGS! WHAT IN EQUESTRIA DID YOU DO TO MY LEGS?!” Flam wailed and I merely shrugged as Flim rushed to the aid of his brother.

“Just in case you did think of running...” I said as I went to make my exit, Flim scowling though still very fearful of my presence.

“You're a monster,” he spat, still quivering in fear. I stopped in the doorway, looking to the setting sun in the distance.

“No... I'm a demon... one that roams a world where it doesn't belong.” And with that I made my leave, getting back into Juggernaut and looking to Lassie as I started the truck.

“Well?” she asked and I nodded.

“We reached an agreement. So... feel like seeing my new house?” I asked and she cocked a brow. “Oh... you'll like it...”

* * *

The house... or should I call it a manor?... was massive. I didn't bother counting how many bedrooms it had, nor washrooms. It scaled across a wide expanse of cleared land, land that had been mowed down and flattened atop a hilly region in the Everfree. Fresh grass had been laid out to make the yard look especially beautiful, along with a pony-made pond out front with several pony mermaid waterspouts.

The property was fenced off with large brick walls, the only entrance being a huge front gate, with a large custom entrance sign above the gate that read 'Burdick Estate'. Ha, I should've had them name it Parker Estate.

A long driveway, paved of asphalt, connected from the dirt path in the Everfree, all the way to the front of the house. Out back there was a tennis court... a basketball court... a large swimming pool with slide...

Inside was just gorgeous. The front entrance led into more of an atrium, where there was a big upside down U shaped set of stairs that led up to the second floor, in between the two sets of stairs was another one of those Mermare water fountains.

When we had asked the Liotta family for a nice house as our one favor... I hadn't really meant a grand mansion... just a nice little cozy house somewhere... instead they slap a massive estate in the middle of the Everfree on a big hill overlooking the horizon and state they owed us this much, seeing as how we completely erased their rival family.

I wasn't gonna start complaining. In fact, I had something else I needed to do...

* * *

A song played on the radio as I rubbed my hands together and smiled. I was in the need of a montage...

I fell forwards, catching myself on the palms of my hands before taking one away and beginning push ups with just one hand.

'The hour's approaching to give it your best,
And you've got to reach your prime!'

My body lurched up as I completed my thousandth sit up, my lower abdomen burning in absolute pain yet I pushed past it...

I struggled like never before with the 100lb dumbells. These used to be sport for me, but with Evan slacking and getting old, the body was decrepit and weak... pathetic. My body strained as I forced it to the limit...

The benchpress bar held stationary above my chest as I struggled with the 250lb set of weights, grunting and hissing as I tried for only my tenth rep, gasping as I felt my arms burn in report, lungs wheezing...

Thrusting my fists forwards, I slammed the punching bag relentlessly. However, even so my punches were nothing to what they could be... to what they used to be. The heavy gauntlets around my forearms dripped, soaked with sweat from my body. I went to punch again but slipped and slammed onto my back...

I glided across the room, spinning in a twirl of stroking jump kicks and cartwheeling kicks in graceful motion before slamming the tip of my boot into a plywood cutout of a pony, then yelping as the plywood didn't even budge. I hopped around on one foot, grasping my injured foot painfully...

I struggled just slightly with the 200lb dumbells but nothing serious as I continued to pump iron, starting to become well toned yet again...

The 500lb bench press lay above me but that was no longer good enough. I laid flat and began to do sit ups while holding the bar to my chest...

The 300lb dumbells felt like nothing in my hands as I continued to push beyond the limits of what a human could do, feeling beyond good as I pushed myself even further beyond, onto my five hundredth rep of this single set, the smile across my face dark and sinister...

Pushing my body up with just one hand, I became a blur of motion, smiling as my brows furrowed...

My fists were like a fury of motion, the speed ball nearly held upright as my fists bombarded it with a blinding fury of punches. Suddenly it just erupted, the leather rapping shredded apart and the innards flying about...

I leapt through the air, delivering a powerful flying jump kick into a slab of Ironwood with just my barefoot. The wood splintered apart and felt like but mere matchsticks to me. I let out a loud roar as I spun on my feet and delivered a single, powerful strike to my punching bag, the bag splitting in half and the sand filling all pouring out...

1200lbs stayed stationary above me on the bench press bar as I struggled with it. “Teh... teh...” I grunted as the music continued in the background. “TEHHHH!” I yelled as I tried to force it upwards.

“EVAN!” Lassie gasped, rushing over.

“BACK! STAY BACK!” I yelled and she reluctantly obeyed. “NGAHHHHHH!” I roared out as I began to force it upwards but felt my arms start to give out. “TEH... TEH... TEHAAAAAHHHHHH!” I roared, my arms tensing beyond what I could ever believe as I felt a surge in power.

A red aura coated my arms and a powerful whirlwind surrounded me. The whirlwind blew off my eye patch, revealing my damaged eye which was tinted hellish red with a vertically slanted yellow pupil.

“TEN!” I boomed, thrusting the 1200lb weighted bar straight up. Bringing it back down, I let out another deafening roar before tossing it, the impossibly heavy bar flying at least fifteen feet into the air and sailing another thirty feet across the weight room, smashing down onto the floor with a loud clanging.

'Always fade out in a montage,
If you fade out it feels like more time has passed,
In a montage!...'

I stood up from the bench, wobbling and shaking. Lassie stared at me with widened eyes, fearful for my well being. I staggered forwards and tried to raise my right arm to punch but could barely manage.

I fell to my knees, looking to myself in a mirror, beaten... defeated... hair greying.

“NO!” I roared, standing and throwing a blinding fury of punches that where but a mere blur to the untrained eye. Though yet again I collapsed to the floor, gasping and wheezing as my whole body burned, lungs wheezing.

My hair started to turn light grey. “No... no... NO!” I yelled, clenching my eyes shut and tensing my whole body as I was coated in the same hellish red aura as before. It soon faded and I looked to the mirror once more, my body once again appearing as though I was but forty, with still dark brown hair.

“EVAN!” Lassie wailed as she rushed to my side.

“Don't!” I gasped but she still none the less persisted, shoving a box of tissues my way.

“You're bleeding,” she told me and it was only then I realized I had a gushing nose bleed that had created a small pool of blood beneath me... perhaps why I was feeling light headed.

I smiled and took a tissue, stuffing it in my bleeding nostril. “Evan-” but I cut her short.

“Derreck! Evan was weak... just a pitiful old man. I... am Derreck Parker... the very best... at least I used to be... but soon, I will once again reclaim my throne!” I stated.

“Eva... Derreck, whoever you are! Relax. You've pushed your body passed it's limits and it's breaking down. Give yourself a rest, you need it... please!” she pleaded with me and I sighed, my stomach grumbling.

“I guess... I could use some fruits... a salad... maybe a sandwich... but then I'll need to get back to training.” I stood up to my full height then winced. “Guess I'll need to take these off,” I stated, pulling off the weighted head wrap and tossing it aside, dropping my weight by twenty pounds.

Taking off the gauntlets I dropped another hundred, each gauntlet being fifty pounds. The ankle weights were next, each one another fifty pounds. Then came my weighted belt, which was in excess of a hundred pounds.

Last but not least was my black gi, which weighed in another excessive hundred pounds, having been woven of a specially dense fabric that made it unbearably difficult to anypony that may try to wear it for training purposes. Just wearing it would be a workout.

I was left in my underwear but soon dawned my Punisher getup and proceeded to the kitchen. As we walked along the several hallways of the manor, we bumped into three playing puppies that rolled around.

“I thought they were in their pen,” I said, addressing her puppies that she had given birth a few weeks pior.

“Ahhh... sorry I-” but she was cut off by a voice that left my mouth without my command.

“Nah, it's alright. Let them play,” Evan's voice spoke. “Time with family is priceless... and besides, they look happy.”

I grunted. “Fine, but I'm not cleaning the hallways of dog piss,” I grumbled and Lassie just chuckled.

“Doesn't Alfred usually clean it?” she asked, addressing our butler, only making me chuckle more.

We made our way down to the kitchen and I started to make myself something to eat. “Lassie... my friend... what would you like to eat?” I asked as I made a healthy salad and some sliced melon.

“I'll hafph wha yer halphing,” she said, my brow perking as I turned to look at her, only to chuckle as I saw her stuffing her mouth with cookies.

“So be it,” I said, making two of everything. Everything seemed to go quiet and I heard Lassie's jar of cookies hit the floor. Turning to her, I saw her pale face. Before I knew what was happening, a pair of dark hooves had wrapped themselves around my waist and a pair of soft wet lips had pressed against my cheek.

I turned slightly and our lips met. Leaning back, I looked into her beautiful crystal blue eyes. “My princess,” I said with a deep loving smile to which she returned before Lassie butted in.

“Woah, woah, woah, woah, WOAH!” She gasped. “Hold on... time out... Is she... she's... Nightmare Moon?!” She gasped and I nodded. “B-b-but I thought you defeated her... I thought you said-” I cut her short.

“I did defeat her... but the ending I left quite vague...”

* * *

Months ago...

With teary eyes, she looked to me. “Besides, in the short time we've spent together, I've lived a lifetime's worth. And for that I thank you. But it's time...”

She held the gun in her magical grip and pressed the barrel to her forehead, my hand on the pearl grips of the massive firearm. Her magical grip let go and I stood there, pistol locked on her head as time moved on, wind blowing in the background, wisping up dry leaves.

My finger moved into the trigger guard and finger pressed gently against the trigger itself. Her eyes clenched shut, tears dripping from them. My face twitched and I squeezed the trigger, the gunshot like a crack of thunder, followed by a gasp.

The gasp however was not from me, but from her as her eyes shot wide open. She blinked, then patted her body in confusion before noticing the crater of dirt beside her. “Wha...what?” she asked in confusion as I holstered Belladonna and grabbed her by the shoulders, pulling her up to my level.

“This night... this beautiful night, is the night you are reborn. Here, now, tonight... beneath your beautiful full moon. This is the night it is all rewritten. We are both outcasts of society. Meant not to be... If you take my hand, I'll take your hoof and we'll guide each other through this world... through the shadows of society and culture... do you take my hand?” I asked, holding it out for her.

She placed her bare hoof in my hand and I closed my fingers around it. “I do,” she replied before we pressed our bodies together and embraced in a passionate kiss...

* * *

Present day...

Lassie blinked in complete shock. “WHAT?! REALLY?!” She gasped and I nodded. “No way... so like... THE Nightmare Moon... is living with us?!” she gasped but Moon shook her head.

“Not quite. For the past few months I have been roaming the world. Trying to find out who I am. Without Luna, I am no longer just a second... I am... well, that's what I have been trying to figure out. What am I if Luna and I are now two completely separate entities?” she asked and Lassie shook her head.

“Woah dude... that's intense,” she stated. I nodded but before I could speak, Alfred, our butler, arrived.

“Master Parker... there appears to be several... oh, how should I put it... things, outside. They said you invited them,” he stated and I blinked.

“Oh snap! It's Saturday isn't it?!” I gasped and he looked to me with that everlasting look disapproval. I looked to my F&F watch and realized it was indeed Saturday... the first day of November in fact.

“Yeah, Alfred. Those are my friends. Mind letting them in?” I asked and he again looked to me with that unimpressed look.

“The dragon one let himself in...” he stated before trotting away, leaving me kinda confused but quickly forgot about it as Discord walced in.

“Derreck, ol' chum ol' buddy!” he greeted and the two of us clapped hands/claws together and performed a wild secret handshake before embracing in a hug.

“Discord! Man, how yah been?!” I asked and he shrugged.

“Quite well actually. And I met your other friend on the way. You were really going to have her tread the Everfree by herself?” he asked and another voice piped up.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie can manage by herself. The Everfree forest is not a difficult obstacle for Trixie to overcome.” I looked to the side to see the magician mare in her usual getup and just chuckled.

“Nice house though, huh?” I asked and her jaw nearly dropped.

“House? HOUSE? Trixie's home is a house. This is an entire estate! WHY... How did you ever afford such a property?!” she gasped and I just shrugged.

“Yah know... but uhh... if yah want you can totally just chill here if you want. I wouldn't mind. Place has got like thirty some-” but I was cut off by Discord as he squealed in delight.

“A pool!” he squealed like a little filly as he rushed towards the kitchen doorway that led out to the back deck. In his hurry however, he didn't realize there was a sliding glass door, and thumped into it head first, knocking him back and onto his ass.

“Wha... well that wasn't there a minute ago...” Discord commented before sliding open the door and rushing out, leaping into the pool.

“It's cold!” I called out, just a second later Discord resurfaced, screaming bloody murder.

“IT'S FREEZING!” He gasped, flying out of the water. “WHY IS IT SO COLD?!” He gasped as the rest of us walked out.

“Murrr... Ah dunno... maybe cause it's November?” I replied and he scoffed.

“Well this simply won't do!” he said just before he levitated himself up into the air, the water glowing in a magical tint. “Right... should be the perfect temperature now!” he stated. “Hey Trixie, watch this!” He said, letting himself drop as he tried to perform a dive but ended up just belly flopping into the water with a loud SLAP!

I cringed from the belly flop but he seemed to resurface without much notice. “It's perfect!” he stated.

“So this is the glorious estate you've written to me so much about,” came yet another voice, taking all our attention to the changeling queen.

“CHRYSIE!” I called out joyfully as I took the changeling queen into a hug, twirling her around before setting her back down. “How yah doin?” I asked.

“Quite well in fact. My hive may be separated but they have all found a new social order among themselves in a new land they will hopefully soon call home,” she stated and smirked. “But alas... not even my old hive was this glorious... you have done well for yourself,” she said but Lassie finally interjected.

“OKAY, TIME OUT... Hold the phone... what in Celestia's name is going on here?!” she gasped. “You've got Nightmare Moon... you're... I dunno. You've got the reformed god of chaos playing in your pool... you've got the queen of the changelings... and on top of that they're all chillin' in your new clubhouse? What is this, the house of villains?” she asked and Trixie spoke up.

“BAH! The Great and Powerful Trixie is not a villain!” she chimed and I just shrugged.

“Lassie, no one here is really bad. Yeah we've all had sketchy pasts but hey, we're putting all that behind us and relaxing because... the water is warm,” I said , picking her up in my arms and rushing for the pool.

“HEY, NONONONONO!” Lassie screamed as we reached the pool and I leapt in, clothes and all. Resurfacing, Lassie screamed at the top of her lungs in shock of the water. “YOU BOZO, IT'S... Oh hey, Discord you're right... the water's a perfect temperature now... good job on that,” she stated, splashing around a bit in the massive pool.

I waved to the others. “Come on guys, water's nice. Promise,” I stated. Nightmare was the first to leap in, launching herself gracefully into the water. Trixie walked over to the edge of the pool, dipping the tip of her hoof in the water to test the temperature. But little did she know, Discord was lurking below, pouncing up through the surface of the water and pulling her down, soaking her clothing along with the rest of her.

“BWAHHHH! HEY!” She gasped, the former god of chaos just laughing to himself. “Why you, I'll get you for that!” she squealed, thrashing through the water in an attempt to tackle him.

“YIPPEE!” Chrysie cried out, leaping into the pool in a cannonball form, creating a medicore splash. Soon enough we were all splashing water at each other. My mind, split with Evan's, envisioned his presence here, though in more of a spiritual form, having a merry time with the others.

I smiled but suddenly gasped as a group of seven puppies leapt into the pool as well, all yipping and barking as they swam about. Chrysie's eyes went wide. “Are those... are they...” she asked in a hushed tone and Lassie nodded.

“Yeah. Max was the father,” she stated and Chrysie very gingerly picked one up. The puppy looked like a perfect 50/50 mix of golden retriever and English Rough Collie. The puppy yipped then began to lick Chrysalis's face. She giggled and nearly broke into tears from the sign of affection... memories resurfaced in my mind, of the first time we had met... and how she got her first puppy, rest his soul.

The others, even myself, began to play with the pups. Soon after it became darker out and the pups grew tired, leaving the scene and wandering back into the manor. “Heh-heh... pups, huh?” I said to the others whom also began to settle.

“Master Parker...” came a voice and I turned to see Alfred. “Miss Lassie's pups have escaped their pen again... and treaded water all through your home...” he trailed off with a risen brow. “I do believe we should sell them soon,” he said, getting a gasp from Lassie.

“Ahhh, come on Alfred... it's not 'that' bad,” I stated and he huffed. He went to turn but in shock found that Lassie had left the pool and was now standing between him and the sliding door.

“I'll show you why they like the water so much!” she giggled before charging the old stallion and gently tackling him into the warm water.

He rose up with a gasp, paddling about. “WHY I... I CAN'T BELIEVE... UGH... when the Liotta family assigned me to this duty, I had no idea how difficult it would be,” he grumbled.

“Oh come on Alfy... it's not that bad. Relax every now and then,” I said before splashing him with some water but he stayed true with that unimpressed look as he left the pool, his tailored suit dripping and soaked right through.

“Man... what a buzzkill...” Lassie muttered as she paddled over to the shallow end. We all settled and began to relax. “What's his deal anyway? Does he really always act like that?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Yeah... but I guess the butler life doesn't allow for fun and play,” I remarked but only just before a gallon of icy cold water splashed down on me. I yelped out and my yelp was followed by Lassie's as she was hosed with a soaker water gun, filled with icy water as well.

“I'll show you who's the buzzkill!” giggled the old stallion, now in swimtrunks as he rushed forwards and leapt into the pool. “COWABUNGA!” He called out as he splashed into the water, paddling around delightfully.

He soon resided with the rest of us, sighing contently as we all relaxed and began telling stories of our earlier days. We all had some pretty good ones... some of Alfred's were pretty dark, talking about how he'd have to clean Mr. Leone's 'yard trimmings' and dispose of them.

“Well... I'm pruning,” I stated, getting up and leaving the pool.

Alfred also got out. “Indeed. I will need to clean up the mess the puppies made,” he stated. The others also got out.

“So what next?” Chrysie asked and Lassie spoke up.

“Poker!” she chimed and I rose a brow.

“Poker?” I asked and she nodded.

“Yeah... 'cept... uhh, strip poker,” she commented and I just scoffed out a laugh. “No seriously! You've got money to blow out your ass these days so poker to you is just a game... the real gambling comes from the loss of clothes in front of others... come on, it'd be fun!” she pleaded and Alfred just groaned.

“Ahem... the ideals of playing poker while stripping is an immature one. I'll be cleaning your residence,” he stated.

Discord spoke up. “I'm in,” he stated, transforming into a maid dress and Lassie then spoke up.

“Ooh-ooh-oooh, do me, do me! I wanna be dressed like a cheap hooker!” Discord clapped his claws and Lassie was dressed in high heels, fish net stockings, a mini skirt and a sleezy top with dark markup and eye liner. “Oh yeah!” she said.

“Fine... The Great and Powerful Trixie will play as well. She looks forward to seeing you all naked before her,” Trixie boasted. I rolled my eyes. For someone whom had been sexually abused by her brother she seemed pretty enthusiastic to do this.

“If I get a librarian outfit, I'll play,” Chrysalis stated. Discord was quick to transform her into a slutty looking librarian, with the pants squeezing tight to her curves. They looked to me and I shrugged.

“I guess,” I said, our group proceeding inside to the dining room and clearing a space on the table.

“Alright,” Lassie said, shuffling the cards. “One deck, fifty two cards... house rules,” she explained the rules and it was pretty simple. Essentially it was Texas Hold 'Em but without the constant betting. The only real form of betting was which article of clothing was to be removed, with more revealing clothing being worth more as one could up the ante by betting their undies or a similar garment.

Compared to actual poker, it went by relatively quickly. I soon found myself without boots, socks and my undershirt, still keeping my duster since Chrysie had won against me when she put ante with her bra and I had lost to her.

Pouring myself some hard apple cider, which Lassie had cracked open at the beginning of the game, I sipped on the heavy beverage. The others had all been variously affected by the liquor, both dependent on quantity they had indulged and their own resistance to intoxication, myself being greatly higher due to my healing factor's high resistance to alcohol's effect on my body.

Discord and Nightmare were just behind me, their godly forms allowing their body to take in more alcohol without too much effect. Chrysalis was somewhere in the middle, whereas Lassie and Trixie were just slammed.

I had folded early in the match, not having a very powerful hand to begin with. Lassie tossed her cards to the table. “Fold...” she muttered, making Discord snicker. It was just him and Trixie now.

He put down the final community card and the showdown began. Trixie set down her two hole cards, being a four and a seven, which matched the four and seven community cards. “HA! THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE-” But she cut herself short when Discord played out a set of kings, a third king being in the community cards.

“Three of a kind,” Discord slurred. “Now... let's see that pretty little flank...” he murmered and she blushed heavily, regretfully removing her cape. Discord, in his drunken stupor, groped her bottom, making Trixie squeal in shock.

“Whash you think yer doin'?” she gasped, drunk as ever.

“Yer sexy,” Discord replied back and the two stared each other down, Trixie at first glaring at him but they suddenly just pressed their lips together and began to make out in a hot fiery passion.

The two fell to the floor, struggling in the drunken state to get their hindering clothes off. “HEY-HEY-HEY!” I called to them. “There's like thirty other rooms. Go do that somewhere else,” I told them. The duo staggered off and Lassie began to reshuffle the deck then tossed us each two hole cards.

“Alright, ante up,” she stated and before I could react, Chrysie realigned herself in her chair in a way that was most presenting and flung her panties at me like a slingshot. The panties, slick with her pussy juices, slid down my face as I kept a somewhat unimpressed face but alas rose my brow.

“I'm in,” Lassie said, tossing her own set of panties into the pot as well. Nightmare however, having no undergarments on her usual attire, simply put all four of her boots on the table instead.

Lassie rubbed her paws together and licked her chops. “Alrighty then, Mr. Ultimate badass... let's see 'em!” she said enthusiastically.

“What if I decide to fold?” I asked, not bothering to look at my cards as of yet.

“AWWWW, don't be a buzzkill. Take it off!” she cheered.

I rolled my eyes, slowly standing up and deciding to let her indulge as I slowly slid down my pants to access my underwear. Her and Chrysalis, both intoxicated as ever, watched in great fascination.

Turning around, I slowly slid down my undies, giving them a fine view of my toned ass as I slowly slid off my underwear. “Oh man...” Lassie's speech was slurred. “I'd totally let myself get fucked by that.” She hiccuped and I just laughed.

“You wish,” I replied in an Arnie tone and went to sling shot it at Lassie but it ended up slapping Nightmare in the face, who nearly jumped back in shock, blushing deeply even through her dark fur. I had a raging hard on at this point, which I did nothing to conceal as I sat back down.

“Alright... divy up,” I said and Lassie went to deal but then swore to herself as she looked to the clock.

“Crap... I gotta feed the pups and put 'em to bed... drat, and just when things were getting inter-” she was cut off by shrewd moans coming from right above us.

“Oh goddess YES! My great and powerful pussy has been penetrated by chaotic cock!” Trixie screamed in ecstasy and I merely groaned. Of the thirty some rooms in the mansion... they of course chose the room directly above our poker game to buck.

Lassie looked up. “You know... for a sexually abused rape victim... she sounds pretty kinky in bed... alas, I gotta go tend to my pups,” she said, standing up with a rather loud belch.

“Oh, can I come too? I really do love those adorable little fuzzballs,” Chrysie chimed and Lassie nodded, the two of them staggering off. I slipped my undies back on and turned to Nightmare.

“Just the two of us, hmm?” I asked as she shuffled the deck. Getting dressed I took note of how she had removed/lost a lot of her clothing during the game but had always refrained from removing her helmet. She dealt us out both two hole cards and spoke.

“Alright, I dealt, you make ante,” she stated and I placed my cowboy hat in the pot.

“Headwear,” I stated and she gulped. “Ante up. Or do you fold?”

“I... I'll remove it when I lose,” she said and I perked a brow. “I... it's just... I feel naked without it,” she mentioned and I nodded.

“I know... but that's when you're the cutest,” I stated, making her blush even more.

“Mr. Parker... I think you've had too much to drink,” she said but I shook my head.

“Nah... nah I've had just enough... you know, Evan used to play chess with Derpy and I'd always make him play as your side just so I could admire your statuette piece. Even when he lost I wouldn't let him knock you over... I'd get him to read about you because... I thought you were interesting... yet I never got to see you without a helmet in all the time of researching you... I was so intrigued though I thought I may never get my chance... and then Luna tried to invade my dreams and I knew... if I induced her into the war torn memories of WWII... she'd be bewildered... scared... angry... and you'd return once more and I'd finally get my chance,” I told her and she gasped.

“Are you saying that... that when Luna roamed your dreams that you induced the two of you into coma and put her through that war just to... to see if she might once again transform into me?” she gasped and I nodded.

“I wanted to see your pretty face without a helmet,” I commented and she blinked.

“That's a horrible, terrible thing to-” I cut her short.

“She invaded my dreams, my mind... without my consent. I don't believe I need her consent in return,” I stated and she bit her lip.

“You've already seen me once without my helmet,” she stated and again I nodded.

“And you were the most beautiful pony I have ever laid my eyes upon... so I want to see it again... naturally,” I stated, making her cheeks nearly pure red.

“A-al-alright... but just once, since it's just you and me,” she said, slowly removing her helmet and setting it on the table, letting her wonderful mane run freely. She was so beautiful without the helmet, her facial features an untouched beauty.

“Okay... deal,” I said and she began to lay out card after card of the community cards. First was a two of diamonds. Next was a ten of spades. Third came an ace of hearts. Next was the queen of spades and finally the ace of spades.

“I'll tell you what Mr. Parker... since you had me remove my helmet and make me feel naked and bare... I'm willing to go all in... only if you are,” she said in a cocky and all too confident voice. She looked to me and I nodded. The two of us quickly undressed and tossed all our clothes into a clumped heap.

“Alright I-” I began but she was quick to claim her victory as she slammed down her two hole cards, one being the ace of diamonds, the other being the ace of clubs.

“Four of a kind! ACES!” she said triumphantly, leaning in to grab her helmet but I put a hand over it, pushing aside three of the aces and the two of diamonds then placing down my jack of spades and king of spades. Her eyes went wide as she looked down.

“Royal flush... sweet cheeks,” I said, leaning in and pressing my mouth to her muzzle. She nearly leapt back.

“I've... we've had too much to drink,” she stated nervously. I stepped forwards, completely nude and a raging hard on.

“Nightmare... from the day I first read about you... first heard about you... I've loved you. I-” she cut me off.

“I can not Derreck. My... I can only love those who can defeat me-” she cut herself off by running away. I cocked a brow. Well... that's stupid. Why would she only love someone who could defeat her, and besides, I already defeated her once. I slipped all my clothes back on and wandered down the hallways, sniffing out her scent and finally finding her in the large gymnasium, also where I had my workout equipment.

“Moon,” I began, seeing her crying.

“You used to be powerful. One of such greatness. But now your powers are faded and but a shell of your former self. I'm sorry Derreck, but I cannot allow you to couple with me,” she wept and I was taken aback by the sudden implementation of sex.

“What?!” I gasped and she stood tall.

“I have kept my virginity, for over millennium. I have waited for the perfect mate. Somepony whose power can rival or exceed my own. One whom I'd mother his children. One whose foals would genomically inherit his prowess, as well as my own. When we did battle, all those months ago, your power was absolute. A power which has never been explored. But now Derreck... I just don't-” but I cut her short, stepping forwards in a powerful way.

“If you think age has slowed me any... than you'll be just as surprised as you were when we first did battle... and if you can only love a conqueror... then prepare to be conquered,” I stated boldly, drawing out the Shadow Blade, itself seeming to somehow just materialize from nothing.

Nightmare drew out a blade of her own and stood in a fighting stance. I clenched the unwieldly sword in both hands and tensed, my body growing slightly as my muscles expanded even further than before, veins starting to bulge.

“HAHHHHHHHHH!” I roared out, my body coated with a red flaming aura and a powerful flashing whirlwind surrounding me.

Nightmare smirked as I simmered my power. “Are you ready... to witness a power not seen for generations?” I asked. At blinding speeds, I zoomed forwards, my eye patch fluttering off from the wind resistance. Our swords, a mere flash of motion, clashed together, the impact forcing us to cock back and swing at each other again, Nightmare swinging first and trying to strike low. I blocked her strike and we both clashed our blades, again up high, but held the connection.

I pushed her blade aside and moved in, just inches away from each other. Our eyes met and she looked deep into my damaged eye that glowed red. “I can see... age has not deterred you one bit...” she trailed off and both our eyes clothes as we leaned in and embraced in a passionate kiss, releasing the grip we had on our weapons and letting them clash down to the ground.

We moved against each other as she stripped the clothes from my body. My body's aura started to fade but just before I let my magic slip away, I teleported us to my master's bedroom, laying her down upon my bed.

“Derreck,” she whispered and I silenced her, bringing my lips to hers. As I pulled back she finished her statement. “You are a worthy mate. Now take what is rightfully yours. Claim my innocence and deflower me upon this bed. Fertilize my soil with your seed and-” I cut her off, pressing my lips to hers yet again.

As much as I loved her, that old medieval style sex talk was gonna kill my vibe. My burly arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her tight. I aligned myself without the use of hands, hooves or magic, finding her wet puffy entrance and brushing my erect shaft up against it.

She gasped and moaned into my mouth as our tongues began to wrestle. I felt a surge throughout my body, an instinctual drive. One that suddenly made me want to just rut her... to drive myself deep into her and just... breed her?

I brushed it off and started to tease her, prodding my erect shaft against her blessedly tight entrance. Her puffy lips spread apart against the head of my cock, coating it with her slick juices. She bucked her hips towards me, so needy... so horny. She had been depraved of this sacred act for over millennia... and I wasn't going to deprave her of it much longer.

My hips began to push further, each time nudging just a millimeter further than before, pushing myself into her unclaimed depths, making her gasp in pure blissful ecstasy as she almost agonizingly anticipated the penetration.

She pulled back from the kiss. “Penetrate me Derreck Parker. Don't be gentle. You have earned my virg-” I cut her off, thrusting my thick cock deep into her virgin snatch. She yelped out in a mix of shock, pain and pleasure, all mixed into one as for the first time she was penetrated, having waited all these years for somepony... someone, who was worthy.

The red fluid of her innocence bled out onto my silky white bed sheets, staining it with proof. I started slow, letting her become accustomed to the intrusive member that caused her slight discomfort but a growing pleasure of which she had never known.

“Oh my... Derreck I... I think... I feel-” I cut her off, my mouth to hers once again, our hips pushing together as I embraced her with the most sacred, most beautiful act one could embrace upon another.

Her moans became more powerful and within just moments I felt her snatch tightening immensely against my shaft. I stopped, pressing it in as deep as I could and letting her soft cooch squeeze me for everything it was worth, Nightmare moaning all the while.

Her love hole finally stopped it's relentless milking, yet still twitched every so often as our lips parted. “Derreck... I just... I just-” I put a finger to her lips.

“I know. And it was beautiful,” I said, her eyes gleaming as she looked into mine. I began to thrust my hips again, he moans skyrocketing as I plundered her depths, finding all her sweet spots which I'd tease on a constant basis.

The whole while she came multiple times, each time seemingly sexier than the last, and each one making me hornier and hornier, my lust to breed her growing. I felt myself stiffening, my climax growing ever closer. Her slick depths slurped against my rod, seeming to pull me in every time I tried to pull back. I felt a tingling in the base of my testicles, erupting all the way up through my shaft and my eyes went wide.

“Nightmare I-” she pulled me into a kiss, her hindlegs wrapping tightly around my back as she pulled me in tight, not letting me pull out even an inch as her twat clenched down, the thrust forwards against the resistance of her tightened hole sending me over the edge.

My whole body lurched into hers, my rod surging as I poured my essence inside of her, cum plastering her pink inner walls white and flooding her womb, soon flooding back out and drooling down the crevice between her perfectly molded flank cheeks.

We stayed immobile for several minutes, just staring into each other's eyes as I lay atop of her, still twitching as dribbles of cum continued to leave my cock while her twitching twat milked me. “Derreck. I will mother your children. I will groom them to be great warriors, just like their father,” she told me. I wasn't sure what was so sexy about hearing her say that but I ended up twirling her around, holding her rump up high and taking a brief look to her hole which twitched and leaked out my seed.

“But until then...” I trailed off as I slid my still erect cock back inside of her, making her squeal.

“Sloppy seconds?” she asked.

“No, just extra lubrication,” I told her as I began to thrust into her hole, herself pushing back against my lap with each thrust, meeting me in perfect unison. “Mmm... such a perfect little pussy,” I stated, thumping her as hard as I could, making her squeal louder and louder with her thrust. I gave her a gentle swat right to the flank, right on her cutie mark and making her squeal even louder.

With the new position I could feel her clitoris twitch every now and then, rubbing itself again the base of my cock as I rammed her. "Ahh... the wink..." I held her tight and continued to hump her like a horny mutt fucking his bitch in heat.

“Who's your daddy?” I asked, swatting her on the flank again.

“You are... oh, yes! Buck me harder,” she squealed. I gave her another swat, making her inner walls clasp down around my shaft, causing even more pleasurable resistance. I could feel every muscle, every ripple inside of her magnificent, warm, velvety cooch.

“Oh goddess yes, Nightmare,” I hissed and she could feel me getting close yet again. She flexed her rear end, causing her already tight hole to become even tighter, crashing me over the edge as she pushed her hips into me.

“Yes, cum inside of me. Dump your load into my vagina and seed me,” she wailed, still hell bent on getting knocked up. Whichever, it was sexy as hell. I had my second cumming, dumping another fertile load into her depths, driving myself in deep as I blew my load.

Exhausted, I fell back, my cock plopping out of her and letting even more seed pour out of her hole which twitched, trying to clasp shut and keep all the seed inside but failed to do so. I lay on my back but saw that Nightmare was crawling towards me, a burning desire still deep in her eyes.

Cum continued to pour out of her, leaking all over my bed and eventually onto my lap as she perched herself atop of me. “Nightmare...” I said in a whispered voice, my mind lost in ecstasy as I imagined that tight cunt of hers once again wrapped around my cock which was still hard like a diamond.

She didn't bother on formalities and simply plunged herself down on my cock, impaling herself on my rod. I felt her walls already clasping down on me as she gyrated her hips against my lap, riding herself to a quick orgasm. I went to speak.

“That was fast-” she cut me off, putting her lips to mine and forcing her tongue deep down my throat and nearly choking me... but even so, it was highly erotic. Having her shove her tongue down my throat like this... dominating me... I wouldn't mind from time to time.

Even through her orgasmic high, she managed to keep a smooth rhythm and drive herself to several more orgasms as we rutted in the same position for over an hour and a half, going well into early morning.

Just as the sun began to rise over the horizon I felt myself start to tense. “Oh wow... Nightmare...” I gasped and she began to thrust harder this time around.

“I want us to... do it together this time,” she cried out through a moan of pleasure. I couldn't help but agree. That would be wonderful. We found our rhythm and stuck to it, both our pleasures rising at a similar speed.

“Derreck!” she cried out, the sun peaking up over the distance and shining it's cascading gaze over us.

“NIGHTMARE!” I pulled her hips down on mine just as I blew my load inside of her, while at the same time her orgasmic high shattered all her thoughts, blasting her into a blissful plateau of which she didn't quite recover from and collapsed atop of me.

I waited for a moment but soon heard the cute sounds of her gently dozing away.

I sighed and figured perhaps I should get some rest as well. Pulling both our bodies up onto the bed, and away from the wet spot, I snuggled into her and dozed off...

* * *

I awoke to the feeling of Nightmare's muzzle pressing up against my neck as she licked me and gave me ginger kisses. “Morning... beautiful,” I whispered and she merely leaned up over me and gave me a kiss.

“You used to be a legend... feared by your enemies and revered by those you fought alongside. Your powers were unrivaled by anything. You were the greatest sole power to ever exist... and your friend Evan washed it all away. You've become but a myth now. Others believing it was just Equestrian propaganda that they had a warrior of unmatched talent. One of sheer greatness that was so immense not even an army could deter him... I wish for you to go once more, become that greatness you once were. I can see it in your eyes, the power still resides inside of you,” she stated.

“Are you coming with?” I asked and she shook her head.

“I have found my place, here, with you. I will wait for you to return and watch over the manor, and surrounding areas. To have the legend come back to life, you'll need to do this on your own.” She gave me a nod.

“So what... just go... do stuff?” I asked and she again nodded.

“Spread your influence once more. Become the legend, and reveal the myths to be true... and if you are to meet another mare, just remember there is a difference between love and sex. Spread you influence not only through violence,” she told me.

“Are you saying to bang the shit outta random mares?” I asked. “Like, polygamous lifestyle?” I asked.

“I said to spread your influence. But always remember to have your heart lay with me,” she stated. I perked a brow.

“Now go... let the legend of Derreck Parker be reborn!”

* * *

It was late November now. As I looked out the window of the train car I smirked. “Looks like winter's late... again,” I muttered to myself as I watched the empty fields pass by.

A waiter came by with a little trolly cart. “Can I get you anything?” the zebra mare asked. I perked a brow.

“Depends... define anything... I have a wide variety of tastes,” I stated and she twitched her lip.

“Well, we do have some exotic fruits, straight from Zebrafrica,” she informed me and I nodded.

“Zebrafrica huh? I've been there before. Nice place. I really like the expanse of nature...”

* * *

Rebel fighters charged at me with primitive weapons and I slew them down with my AKM, heavy 7.62mm slugs chewing the rebels down in a horrible massacre, one which they originally started against the tribes of the areas.

More surrounded me from all directions, spears pointed my way. With a fresh magazine in hand, I slapped the old one out and fed my automatic rifle a fresh mag, the spun on the tip of one foot, triggering the rifle as I spun and chewed down all the combatants.

A rhino charged forwards, being rode by a pony whom wielded a wooden shield and spear.

The spiritual embodiment of Evan appeared beside me, gripping his Desert Eagle. I held his massive cannon in my right, my HK MK23 in my left and pumped the baddie. Evan's heavy hitter smoked the rhino a few times in the head and took it down, while my .45ACP took down the rider.

A time later I met with the great tribal leader, who thanked me graciously. For, according to him, I had rid the area of bad omen and restored peace to the villagers...

* * *

“Or...” the zebra attendant said, bringing my attention to a sea food dish. “We do have a small selection from the Griffon Kingdom. Not much but if you're into sushi you might like it,” she told me.

“The Griffon Kingdom huh? I've been there once before... nice attractions...”

* * *

Blood dripped down my face, bloodying my look as I slashed apart another enemy combatant with a double edged sword. Another came from behind me and he too I cut into mincemeat.

Several opposing gladiators surrounded me in the ring and I just chuckled, launching myself forwards and slashing the closest one before twirling in a set of cartwheels and cutting apart enemy after enemy, blood soaking my body.

A pair of Gryphons rode a cart being pulled by two slave ponies. I chuckled and grabbed a long dangerous spear and hurtled it at the group. Being so long, the spear pierced through both ponies and sent the Gryphons hurtling through the air.

Being bound in heavy battle armor, they lacked the use of their wings, which was usually accommodated by light armor.

One of the Gryphons broke his neck as he landed, being killed instantly. The other crashed brutally to the ground and I picked up a massive war hammer from a dead zebra nearby, the hammer easily weighing an excess of thirty five pounds.

The one live Gryphon tried to cower away and I looked to the ruler who held his claw out, his thumb perfectly horizontal. The crowd began to chant and the wounded Gryphon before me cried for mercy. The leader flipped his thumb... down.

And with it, down went my hammer, with crashing force that splattered his grey matter, along with blood and skull fragments, all over my body...

* * *

“And there's also an assortment of western styled foods. There's home baked apple pies, apple cider, both sweet and hard...”

I licked my lips. “I like the western towns... nice, kind ponies out there...”

* * *

I leaned back in my seat as I sat in the corner of the saloon. Blood dripped down my war torn facial features, the blood from a recent occurance. I tipped back my beverage then set it down, my drinking glass again empty. I rose my hand and called out for the bill. The waitress came back over to give the bill. “Will that be everythin' suga?” she asked in a stereotypical southern accent and I rose a brow.

“Depends... any other... services you can offer... wanna make a tip?” I asked...

Only seconds had passed and I had the western mare bent over the bar table, flank in the air as I used saliva for lube and plundered her puckered little tail hole, making her scream and gained the attention of all the stallions in the room, some of which leaned back and began to stroke themselves to the sight of the cute western mare getting rammed publicly.

I pumped myself harder and harder. It felt strange really. Her sphincter tried pushing my cock out of her with every thrust, much the opposite to the feeling of a pussy's milking feeling. Any way somepony would put it, it still felt good enough.

I grabbed her gropeable flanks and gave them a good squeeze while I used them more like handles to pull her into my cock. Her whole body jiggled with each thrust, her moans of pleasure mixed into the lewd conversations of others that jerked themselves to the sight of the show. I began to spank her flank cheeks, making her squeeze harder around my cock with each swat.

I lurched myself into her, blowing my load deep into the mare's bowels, having her scream in wild ecstasy as she felt my hot load squirt into her twitching ass. I pulled out with a smirk, looking to her gaping tail hole.

She tried to stand, my white cum dripping out of her hole as she staggered to keep her footing. “Well hun,” I said, tossing the mare a Celestia bit. “That was well worth this kinda tip,” I told her and she gave me a fazed, blushing smile as she took the tip and wobbled towards the mare's room, walking a little funny as she continued to drip my cum from her ass...

* * *

“So what'll it be?” the zebra mare asked.

“Well... I've never had a zebra before...”

I had the mare up against the wall of the caboose, away from prying eyes as I slammed my cock deep into her loving snatch, he zebra mare moaning in deep pleasure as I pounded her, holding her backside up against the wall as I used her more like something to merely sheath my cock in.

There was no kissing. No exchange of loving expressions. Just primal rutting at it's very basic. Just a way for two ponies, or other, to sate their desires... either way, it didn't stop me from groping her ass and squeezing her cheeks together to make her pussy feel tighter.

The zebra mare came long and hard without much warning, her snatch clenching, trying to coax me into seeding her as it milked my cock. “Hmm,” I hummed to myself, letting her ride out her orgasm on my cock before withdrawing from her.

“Alright sweet cake... think you can deep throat this?” I asked, taking a seat. The mare didn't say a word as she got down to her knees and began to suck me off, myself already on the verge of my orgasm.

Her wet mouth gulped down my cock and I could visually see the bulge in her throat as she began to take it deep. I grabbed the back of her head and began to thrust into her muzzle, her nose scrunched up against my lap several times.

As I reached my peak I leaned back, releasing her head from my grasp as I clenched the seat and gripped it tightly, feeling my load shoot down her throat. I grunted several times but through my grunts, heard her gag and felt her hot wet mouth pull itself away from my cock just as I was still erupting, now plastering her face with my white cream.

The two of us huffed and recovered from our sexual endeavor. The zebra spoke up first. “That was fun. I have not rutted like that in a long time. That you, he who walks on two legs,” she thanked me and I came to realization the train had stopped.

“Damn. Well toots, looks like this is my stop. Maybe I'll see you around someday and we can do this again...” I didn't even bother saying goodbye, as we had already established it would be just a simple bucking with no kind of relationship whatsoever.

I stepped off the train, walking along the rickety station platform that was in the literal middle of nowhere. No other pony or zebra departed and the train left off into the distance. The desert plains of The Badlands surrounded me as I heaved my luggage over my back, most of which consisted of ammo and my handgun, along with Evan's.

There were no attendants at this station, and it looked ransacked to shit. Why the train even stopped here was beyond me, but it was my stop. Juggernaut sat nearby, partially covered in a light coat of sand. A tumbleweed blew past, along with a dust cloud of sand. I looked to the station, just as the front doorway collapsed along with part of the roof. I turned back to Juggernaut.

I hopped in, tossing my luggage into the back as I started the vehicle and drove off into the distance of the setting sun, back towards Equestria. Back towards home...

Not long had past before the sun began to disappear over the horizon, it's last beacons of lights glimmering over the desolate Badlands.

Evan seemed to materialize in the passenger seat. “Beautiful isn't it?” he asked solemnly. “It's like... life's end... one final bastion of light, a final blaze... before it is extinguished,” he stated in a very depressing way.

“Except... the sun is going to rise again tomorrow morning,” I replied and he just smiled.

“I suppose your right Derreck. You've always been right...” he said before again disappearing. God, what was his deal-

My thoughts were cut off as a magical explosion erupted against the front of Juggernaut, making me lose control and spin out. As I was spinning and trying to regain control of the vehicle, a second blast erupted against the side and flipped the vehicle completely. The windows smashed under the force the vehicle rolling several times and coming to a crashing stop, upside down. I hung upside down, still wearing my seat belt.

"Shit..." I groaned, finding that it was seized and wouldn't unbuckle. The three shiny blades erected from between my knuckles and I slashed the belt of, crashing down onto the interior roof of the vehicle.

I shook my bleeding head, dazed and coming to just as a group of at least two dozen raider clad ponies and zebras along with two adolescent dragons came rushing my way.

“Oh... for fuck sakes!” I growled. A pony went to open the door and I booted it open, flinging him back before scurrying out and catching the closest pony by surprise. I drove a hard fist into his chin and knocked him off his hooves.

One of the unicorns blasted several energy volleys at me. I jumped back and twirled over the overturned battle truck, prying open a back door and retrieving my AN-94. Coming back around the front, I chewed down six of the raiders, their blood tainting the planet's surface as their deceased bodies collapsed upon the already dead ground.

I let off another rapid succession of shots, each pull of the trigger actually hammering out two consecutive shots thanks to its unique design. One dragon however sucked back then blew a shrew of fire at me, some of which caught my old black duster coat ablaze.

I rolled across the ground, back behind Juggernaut, as the group relentlessly, and most foolishly, blasted the place I had been standing moments ago and kicking up the area into a massive eruption of smoke which hindered their vision and allowed me to escape their field of view. Having been rolled and battered, most of the windows had been knocked out of Juggernaut. I reached and grabbed Belladonna, flicking off the safety and punching a round at the ankle of one of the dragons.

The hand cannon kicked in my hand, the muzzle bursting with untamable force. The heavy .50AE slug tore off his clawed foot and flipped him to his back. His eyes went wide as he saw me laying across from him, just before I pumped a second round through his skull.

I stood up and raced around the vehicle, pumping several of the other raiders and catching them by complete surprise. The slide on Belladonna locked back and the AN-94 ran dry

Dropping the assault rifle, I felt the hands of Evan guide my free hand to my belt, drawing another magazine and slapping it into the gun at blinding speeds. Just as I thumbed the slid release, the point of a hoof bow pressed against the side of my head.

“Nice try Slick... but you're not as good as you think,” the stallion said but I just burst into laughter, not moving all that much as I laughed at him.

“Oh... oh how priceless. A bunch of amateurs say I'm not as good as I think. How's this sound. The rest of you...” I looked to the two ponies, the last zebra and the remaining dragon. “Are about to be slaughtered by a female warrior,” I laughed. The stallion went to retort but was cut apart by a blaze of small jacketed projectiles. The other pony and zebra met with the same fate then there was a THUM sound that echoed out

A grenade round slammed against a hard boulder behind the dragon and erupted, blasting the dragon away but the concussive force also slammed me back against Juggernaut.

“GAHHHHH... AHHH... NGAHHHH!” I yelped in pain as I felt a sharp piece of slag shrapnel stabbed into my forehead. Blood oozed down my face, my clothes tattered. “Ahhhh Celestia... dammit Kianna! Did you really have to do that?!” I yelled out, the woman walking around to the side of my vehicle.

“Oh please. I knew it wouldn't kill you. Hell, you're lucky I agreed to drop off your truck and perform recon escort for you while you drove through The Badlands. No pony ever goes through here, and for good reason,” she said and I nodded as I stood up, the slag still lodged into my forehead.

“I know. And that's why I came through here... to show it could be done... NGAHHH!” I yelled out as I pulled the slag from my head.

“Damn, I was just starting to like that look on you. Looked like a horn... making you like some kinda demon or something,” she chuckled and I just sighed. “So what now? Your truck is toast...” she trailed off.

“End of The Badlands isn't that far ahead. Rest of the night walk. I'll have Flim and Flam retrieve it... somehow. Roasted the raider groups in this area so there shouldn't be anymore trouble... least not for a while. Got a bar I'll stop by in Appleloosa. Ol' friends there I'll catch up with... then I'll be heading home,” I told her before tossing her a Celestia bit. “Thanks for the help,” I told her before grabbing all my important luggage from the truck. Looking to the setting sun, and the blazing hot desert ahead, I began to walk into the distance, disappearing into the dusty heat mirages of the desert expanses...

Author's Note

So now we get this... I dunno, understanding, of why Burdy was such an arrogant ass in the beginning. On his old world, filled with hate and anger, and a lack of love, Derreck had dominated control, with just partial input from Evan. The, because love is stronger than hate, when he was with Twilight he just... I dunno, sort of separated from Derreck, became his own free man. But when Twilight couldn't bare what he did and told him to leave, Burdy was once again left heart broken and Derreck came back to control. He's the brash asshole, the arrogance. The... "Fuck this, fuck that. That's gay, you're gay, this world is gay, this is fucked. Fuck you" etc. He's truly a complex character but I think he fleshed out really well... truth be told, I just kinda make shit up off the top off my hat, put it in the story then later if I'm like "Damn... how will I make this work?" I'm like "Oh yeah! This guy!" or thing, or whatever... and I regret to announce I had to destroy my ol' Terra work boots... I rant a lot about hating on liberals in the video...

Chapter 63

'An Echo in the night...'

Nigthmare rest beside me, her hoof rubbing circles on my burly chest. My left arm rest beneath her neck as we laid beneath the glorious full moon, the soft grass of the meadow brushing gently against our sides.

Her helmet lay off to the side, her wonderful mane flowing freely like a fog of mist. I rolled to my side so that we were face to face, her blue eyes looking deep into my own. My right hand slowly traveled down her side several times, stroking her soft velvety fur.

It was warm out, amazingly. For late November I was surprised it was still as humid as it was. Nightmare insisted that the weather pegasi weren't as proficient at weather control as they used to be. No doubt.

She breathed gently, mostly through her nose, her warm exhale brushing gently across my scarred cheeks. “How is it that you are here, with me?” she asked and I merely shrugged.

“A lot of planning, a lot of coincidence... all that kind of romantic stuff.” She pressed her muzzle to me cheek and gave me a wet kiss.

“I meant, how is it that you are here, in Equestria. You have said before that you used to live in a different realm, in a different world. How is it then, that you arrived here?” she asked and I was thrown deep into my memories, or rather, into Evan's memories...

* * *

September 16th, 2013,

Evan's perspective...

The most god awful noise went off, continuously... and in perfect, rather dreadful, harmony. My digital alarm clock blared it's tune, non-stop. I tried to sit up but ended up wobbling and falling off my bed, slamming into the tiled floor of my room.

“ARGGGH!” I gasped as I scrambled along the floor and to the blaring alarm clock, quickly slamming my fist down upon it and silencing the little cretin. I lay there on the floor, breathing heavily to myself. I looked to the clock. It was 3:30am. If I didn't skedaddle I'd be late for work.

I scurried around my room, slipping on some clean clothes. I skidded to a stop and slowly slipped on my holy necklace, whispering a prayer to the lord to have my Monday go smoothly. With that I slipped on my engagement ring then strapped my watch to my wrist and hit the illumination button. 3:34am, Monday, September 16th.

“Right on,” I muttered as I scattered down the stairs and onto the main floor of the old house. Scampering through the living room and kitchen, I nearly leapt down the entire flight of stairs and to the basement.

Skittering to a stop, I knocked on my... her, door. No answer. I knocked again but still didn't get a reply. “Hey,” I called out to the room. “You want a ride to work or not?” I asked outloud. There was a lumbering groan followed by a slurred swear.

“Aww... fuckch off!” she swore. I rolled my eyes. I could tell, just by her voice and the mood behind it, she wasn't hung over, she was still loaded.

“Well I'm leaving for work. If you want a ride then you have to get up now.” There was another few curses before she answered.

“Fucksshhhh... ffffine. Ffffuck I'msh... I'm up for fuckssh shakes...” Without waiting, I rushed to the basement door, slipping on my clean Terra work boots and making a sprint for my truck. Skidding to a stop, I took a moment to admire my beautiful beast.

“Morning, Cadance.” I greeted the truck by trailing my hand down the side of her box as I made my way to the driver side door. The door was buttery smooth to open, as if it were brand new.

I hopped into the driver seat and pulled down the sun visor before promptly catching the falling set of keys mid-flight. “And how are you this grand morning?” I asked before swiping the naughty key in her sensitive spot, the truck emitting a beep-beep.

“Indeed... guess I really know how to turn you on, huh?” I asked as I keyed the ignition. The truck rumbled to life, it's headlights illuminating the front yard which was surrounded by the forest.

I sat in the truck, waiting. Waiting... waiting. Not soon after, I saw my dog run up to the side of my truck. I opened the door and stepped out for a moment. "Hey-yah Ally. How are yah pup?” I asked the dog, who was not even close to being puppy aged yet I still addressed her as such.

She leaned against my legs, panting happily as her tail wagged. I patted her sides, scruffing up the hair on her back and scratching her behind the ears. She continued to pant, tongue hanging out the side of her mouth.

“Oh... you're such a good girl, aren't yah? Aren't yah?” I asked in a bubbly voice. She stopped leaning on me and walked forwards, then looked back to me. I knew that look. She wanted to go for a walk.

“Aww... sorry Ally. I gotta go to work,” I told her and she gave me a sad look, knowing what that one word meant, just like she knew 'Treat', 'Walk', 'Home' and several others. “But I'll tell you what. Right after I get home, we'll go for a walk. I'll be back tonight, I promise,” I told her and she raced up, giving me several dog kisses. “Yes-yes, I promise,” I told her before standing up and wondering what was taking so long.

I looked to my watch. Quarter to. “What's taking her?” I thought to myself, knowing I had to be to the farm for at least 5am. I liked to be there for 4:30am just for the extra time but...

“Be right back Cadance,” I told my truck as I zipped down to the basement once again.

I knocked on the still closed door. “Hey uhh... uhm...” I got choked up on my words. I wanted to say mum, but just couldn't muster the will to do so. “You up?” I called out.

“Huh?! WHAT?!” She yelled out angrily. I sighed to myself. She had fallen asleep.

“Come on. I gotta go to work. If you wanna ride to your work you need to get up,” I called out. I heard her bed squeak before her feet stomped over to the door and it was swung open, her snarly face right into mine.

“Whatta yah want?!” she growled and me, nearly making me flinch.

“I just... I just... do you want a ride to work?” I squeaked timidly.

“NOW?! RIGHT FUCKING NOW?!” She nearly boomed, making me want to shrivel up into a microscopic ball, so small that she couldn't glare at me like she was doing right this moment.

“I just... well it's... I have to be to work too...” I whispered and she grumbled to herself, cursing me several times before stomping back into her room and slipping on some socks and shoes. She had passed out in most of her clothes, which reeked of booze. She had gone to work smelling like this before and I wasn't sure how she kept her job, but I didn't dare ask.

I walked quietly out to my truck, and she followed. Getting to my truck, she attempted to get in but with her equilibrium so thrown off by her intoxication, she slipped a little and fell over. I rushed to help her but she slapped my hand away.

“I dunn need yer fuckin' help!” she slurred at me before standing up and successfully getting into the truck.

I hurried to the driver side and we departed, rather hastily. It was usually a half hour to drive her to work, then a half hour to drive myself back to my work. If I didn't have to drive her it would take me barely ten minutes to get to work.

Not even five minutes into the drive she began to ream me out. At first I had no idea what for, she was just cursing at me.

Soon enough she pieced her thoughts together. “So I guess yer juss gonna fuckin' parade around all day again while I fuckin' work huh?!” she swore, making me sigh in a depressed way but she continued her verbal assault.

“All day I'll be fuckin' slavin' away and you'll juss be... 'Ohhh look a' me, I a fuckin' farmer... blahh...” Her speech was heavily slurred and she was brutally intoxicated... and taking her life's frustrations out on me. “You think yer so fuckin' special huh?!” she swore and I didn't answer. “Don't you?! DON'T YOU?! Fuckin' say something!” she yelled at me, making me flinch.

“I just... I just milk cows,” I whispered shyly, not getting into detail of the long run of things I truly do.

“And you just... I don't started work till seven a clocks... and fuck you cause... you're not driving me to work at the right time. You're driving me now! It's only four!” she screamed. I looked to the clock. 4:21am.

We continued down the large strip of road in the city, passing industrial buildings, gas stations, vehicle dealers, billboards and fast food restaurants.

“Well... I have to get to work too-” but she cut me short.

“Well fuck you, Mr. I'm higher than you. You juss think... you can drive me to work whenever you feel like it. You should... driving me at the proper time. I want to be to work at seven, not at four!” she yelled.

“But... like, what do you want me to do, just stop working, drive home then drive you to work, then drive back to work?” I replied in a most timid way but she was quick to the offensive.

“Well fuck you... I shouldn't even let you drive my truck!” she swore and I tossed my hands up.

“What truck? You don't even have a vehicle,” I replied and she scoffed.

“Oh no?! What the fuck are we driving?” she asked.

“My truck,” I replied and she laughed, cackled even.

“Ha! You fuckin' wishhh. You don't have anything! It's all fuckin' mine. I'm just letting you use my stuff. This is MY truck. I shouldn't even let you drive it!” she yelled at me and I decided to get onto an aggressive defense.

“What?! You didn't even throw in a penny for this truck. I paid for it! Me! ALL ME! I fucking paid every single cent for this truck and not a single person helped me. In fact, you all laughed in my face and said it was a piece of shit. Not a single one of you drunks helped me fix it up! But now, OHHHHHH, I'm the only one with a working vehicle cause your shit cars have broken down so OHHHHHH, it's your truck now cause...” I clenched my hands in frustration and she just scoffed.

“You wouldn't have anything if it wasn't for me! I'm you mother, so everything you own all belongs to me!” I wheeled into the cake making factory and pulled the truck to a stop, my body shuddering with emotion.

“Here... we're here...” I got a little choked up. “I... I love you,” I whispered and again she just scoffed.

“Pfft... whatever,” she got out of the truck without another word, slamming the door as she left and making me again flinch.

'Fuck her, don't let it get to you,' my conscious told me but I couldn't help it. I pulled away and started back tracking towards my own work. Puttering at the posted speed limit, I turned on the radio, hearing the most depressing song come on which made things even harder to bare. My whole life had been like this and... and nothing I could do could make her happy.

Before I could say much, a little ricer sped up behind me, starting to tailgate me and rev its engine before honking and flashing its lights. “Really... at 4:30 there's some dickhead in a ricer on my ass?” I asked myself as he tried several times to pass but found it implausible as there would be oncoming traffic or a lane meridian.

As we headed down the road, he continued to ride up my ass and I was tempted to brake check him but as we neared a set of red intersection lights where the road turned to four lanes, two each way, I smirked, coming up with a better strategy.

I pulled up into the left lane and he ripped up to the right, the windows of the white Mitsubishi Lancer all going down as a fume of narcotic smoke left the vehicle. Several white skid guys flipped me the finger as we sat idle at the red light.

“You think yer fast?” I asked one of them in a deep voice and he laughed.

“Faster than your rusty piece of shit, you hillbilly fuck,” the crackhead looking guy swore. I rose a brow and pointed to the next set of lights that lay further down the road.

“Those lights are about... half a mile down... whatta yah say punk ass? Think your plastic piece of shit can compete with my V8?” I asked and he laughed, revving his engine. Still in neutral, he pinned the accelerator, making the car backfire several times.

I just let my truck idle, rumbling it's diesel tune. “All you're going to see is taillights, you hillbilly piece of shit!” the driver called out. I smirked. Oh... I'd see more than taillights.

The light turned green and he screeched his tires, taking off like a bat outta hell. Not even a hundred yards down the street, hidden behind a billboard, a set of blue and red lights flickered on and a police Charger jumped out and into pursuit.

I was surprised to say the least, that the kid actually pulled over his car. I puttered by, waving to them as I passed. No doubt they'd have drug related charges, reckless driving and probably have their vehicle impounded and license revoked for doing far above the posted speed limit.

“Tah-tah kittens,” I chuckled to myself as I puttered away and past the set of lights. Eventually, and without further incident, I arrived to the farm, pulling my truck up beside the barn. I patted Cadance on the steering wheel. “We showed them, didn't we girl?” I asked before turning off the truck and hiding the keys back in the sun visor.

I slipped into the barn's office and got out of my clothes, quickly putting on some dirty barn clothes and dirty work boots which were falling apart due to the manure eating away at the fabric. Not five minutes into rushing along, the morning's conflict with... her, came to my thoughts, distracting me and putting me off focus.

I scraped all the wet straw and manure from the stables, and ran the chain link stable cleaner which dragged out all the manure from behind the cattle. Once it was finished, I scurried along and put down an abundance of fresh straw, most of the cattle laying down and chewing their cud while I did so.

Moving along with my morning to-do list, I began to clean out the feed alley in front of the cattle stalls. My morning conflict with her still bothering me to no end and even making tears dribble out of my eyes.

As I reached the end of the feed alley, I felt a mouth grab my belt and pull me back. “GUH!” I gasped in shock. The mouth nibbled at my side and I turned, the cow then lightly butting me with the broadside of her forehead.

“Uhh... h-hey mum,” I nearly whispered in a depressed tone, the cow, her real name being Autumn, butting me again. “Uhh... i-it's nothing,” I replied but the cow would have none of it and grabbed my belt with her mouth, pulling me to her stall.

I let out a deep, emotional exhale as tears started to flow from my eyes. “Teh... I just... I...” I huffed several time, almost in a whimper. The cow put her chin on my shoulder and forced me to sit, then began to brush her long, thick nose up and down my side in a loving way.

Moving her muzzle up to my face she began to lick my cheeks, licking away the tears. I couldn't help but start to sob, my breathing becoming heavy as I cried my sorrows, Autumn continuing to lick me in a loving way.

Soon enough she laid down and pulled me to her side, cocking her head around and resting it against my chest, letting me cry into the top of her forehead fur. I cried for what felt like hours, but only succumbed to a few minutes.

Feeling a headache coming on, I curled up against her side in the fresh straw and she held her head against me, like a... like a loving mother. Every so often she'd lick my hair and cheeks, letting out a soft moo. I petted my hand along her cheek, sobbing no longer but rather having the hiccups.

I laid like that until I realized it was getting late... err, well, later, into the morning. I rubbed her cheek several times before planting a kiss on her cheek. “Thank you,” I whispered to her before standing up and finished cleaning the feed alley.

With that done, I hurried to the mixer room, which was more of a long hallway filled with conveyors running from silos, and all leading into a big turbine mixer. I slipped into the mixer with a broom and began to clean off all the turbine blades, each one razor sharp. How I cleaned the mixer could be... frowned upon, by workers comp, but since farmers weren't unionized... I doubt a health and safety board rep would really come in at this time of the morning to bug me.

Cleaning out the excess feed, I hopped back out and hit the conveyor switch, the extra feed running into the feed cart. Most of the food could be emptied into the cart when the mixer was running with the feed door open, but the last forty or so kilograms had to be manually emptied or it could start to go bad.

I shut the feed door then ran the corn silage conveyor, dumping in a fair bit but stopping as my watched beeped at me. I'd have to finish this later, as it was time to start milking the cattle. Flicking off the conveyor, I moved to the milkhouse, where Scotty, my boss, was already prepping the place for milking.

“Mornin,” I greeted him and he looked to me with a tilted stare.

“Are you... okay? You look like you've been... crying?” he asked unsurely, having rarely seen me cry, but I just brushed it off.

“Cold I think... late nights. Really got to me,” I lied and he nodded.

“Ahh. Makes senses,” he replied as we grabbed the milkers and flicked on the milk pump. As we went along and milked the cows, Scotty told me several stories from the night before, mostly stuff about the Toronto Maple Leafs... hah. He kept saying about how this year it was going to be different. This year they were going to rock the house because they had a good roster.

Whichever, I didn't watch hockey... or sports even. He turned the subject to me. “So what's been new with you?” he asked and I shrugged.

“GTA V comes out tonight. Might go at midnight with Chad and pick it up... might uhh... have to take tomorrow off to play it, know what I'm saying?” I asked him and he just chuckled.

“Okay, well tell you what. I'll let you take tomorrow off, but when my wife and kids go on vacation, you let me borrow it, okay?” he asked and I nodded.

“Sure,” I chuckled, laughing all the while. Eventually we finished milking and he headed back to his house. He only ever came out to help with milking, I handled the rest. I cleaned up the milk house and started on my days to-do list, which included finishing the mix, feeding the cattle, etc.

As the day wandered into noon, Scotty returned. “Hey bud, I uhh... I'm going out with my wife for lunch so you'll be on your own today, okay sport?” he told me and I nodded with a bit of disappointment. His wife generally made me lunch which was always beyond good. She made the best lasagna, spaghetti, burgers... heck, you name it, she could probably make it better than expected.

“Yeah. I just gotta put a bale of hay to the pasture girls and I'll take lunch,” I told him and he nodded, then took off. I rolled my eyes then proceeded outside, grumbling to myself that Scotty's wife wouldn't be making me lunch. I got the loader tractor, using it to put a fresh bale of hay out to the pasture for the 'dry' cows.

Heading back inside, I switched out my dirty work clothes for my fresh M81 camouflage jacket and pants, along with my Terra work boots. My dress boots I called them, since they were the cleanest footwear I had. I used to have a pair of fancy dress shoes but the day of graduation, just before I left work to go to grad, I had to help a cow calve... and got afterbirth all over them, along with my dress clothes. Long story short, on my graduation day I wore these Terra boots and my camouflage pants.

I walked back outside and rolled up my sleeves as it was getting rather humid. However, just before I could do anything else, I took notice of movement off in the distance.

Squinting my eyes to get a better look I gasped. “FUCKER!” I snarled as I ran to Cadance. Opening one of the toolboxes, I grabbed out a stripper clip of shells. Moving to the opposite toolbox, I pulled Applebloom out of her case and jammed the stripped clip into the receiver and thumbed the shells into the magazine.

However, the gun only accepted five rounds, due to Canada's laws restricting semi-automatic firearms to five shots only. I removed the half empty stripper clip and racked on the bolt, loading a round into the chamber and racing up to the hay mow of the barn.

Scampering up high, I slid open one of the windows. In front of the window was a small loft with a soft bed of straw I had made for myself a few days prior, along with a set of binoculars. It was my sniper's nest. The bedding was perfectly level with the window so I could lay flat and aim my rifle straight outside.

I laid flat, resting the rifle down and grabbing the binoculars to take a better look. “There you are... you little bastard,” I whispered to myself as the coyote came trotting down the hay and barely fields and towards the cow pasture.

Scotty and I had both seen him on several occasions, always far too close to the pasture for comfort but when we'd go for the rifle in the barn, he'd be gone before we came back. I usually ended up seeing him when I was operating the loader while in the pasture... but today, was his unlucky day.

I scaled out the distance between us and he was a good five hundred yards, easily. “Shit...” I swore but my conscious spoke up.

'Shoulda taken Trillium... it's alright, just wait. He'll get closer,' he told me. I waited... and waited... and waited. Ever so calmly, he eventually made his way towards the pasture, finally getting within two hundred yards. I could've popped at him at three hundred, but I wanted to be sure. I wanted him in my comfort zone to make positive I got him good.

I slide the sight adjuster to the two hundred yard mark and rested the buttstock into my shoulder, cheek welded to the broad stock. My index finger slipped into the trigger guard and gently rested on the trigger itself.

I leveled the rifle, iron sights in perfect unison as I dialed in on the coyote's vital area. My eyes seemed to zoom in on him as I began to gently squeeze back on the trigger. 'No surprise for you,' my conscious said in an Arnie accent.

Just as I was about to hit the sweet spot of the trigger, two more coyotes, smaller ones, came mingling over, seemingly joyful and playful. They rushed up beside their... “UGH!”

My finger moved off the trigger as I watched the mother coyote and the two younger ones forage through the grass for mice. They weren't interested in the cattle... not even getting within fifty yards of the pasture fence... they were just rummaging through the cut hay for... food.

'You should shoot them anyway... just in case,' my conscious told me. I was about to oblige but then saw the two pups start to fool around and play, rather than hunt. The mother coyote called to them, obviously displeased with the shenanigans. I watched the... family... as cold blooded as I was I... I couldn't kill their mother.

My finger moved to the trigger once again.

But instead of squeezing the trigger, I flipped the old, robust, trigger safety, which was just a simple lever behind the trigger to restrict it from being pulled backwards.

I laid there and watched the family of coyotes mingle through the cut hay, the older pups... more like adolescents, fooling around for the most part. I continued to watch them play in the sun.

The warm rays heated my body, my jacket keeping my body heat condensed. I felt... kinda fuzzy... a warm tingly feeling washing over my body. I crossed my arms in front of my head and rested my cheek into them. The coyotes started to get farther and farther away from the pasture, looking for more mice or food.

As they reached the far out distance, my eyes started to get heavy, finding it harder and harder to keep them open. I lay there, watching the empty expanse of open field as the sun beat down upon it, myself resting in my sniper perch.

The warmth, along with the soft straw and cozy camouflage clothing, slowly cooed me to sleep...

* * *

The crack of thunder awoke me suddenly, making me jump. I shook my head as my vision focused into view. “Ahh... GWAHHH!” I gasped in panic as I finally took in the view.

Everything was dimly lit, gloomy... I stood up, heart beginning to race as I looked out to the empty expanse of fields, a dark fog covering the ground. Lightning crackled and sizzled, slashing long streaks across the ground.

The sky was filled with dark clouds that glowed a fluorescent green with each flash of lightning. I scrambled to my feet just as a flash of lightning boomed, not three hundred yards away.

The sky started to swirl, darkening as it did. I couldn't see very far into the distance, no more than probably five hundred yards. Everything was coated in some damn darkness... like a horrid nightmare.

I scooped up my rifle and scattered, figuring it to be safer in my truck than in the sniper nest. I could drive off... to town... screw that, past town... hell, anywhere but here. I scurried down the concrete ramp that lead me down into the tractor yard, a strike of lightning hammering the ground just a few feet beside me, the blast seemingly mystic and causing a kinetic force that tossed me sideways and through the air. I hit the ground, tumbling about and rifle flinging from my hands.

I groaned but my feet were already kicking as I scrambled to find my footing. A brief look to the sky made me wonder if this was some kinda F5 tornado or an ungodly act of nature. I was barely in a crouch as I launched myself forwards and into a full tilted sprint, scooping up my fallen rifle that had been tossed from my grip when I was thrown.

“CADANCE!” I screamed as I locked my view onto the red diesel truck. I moved faster than I ever believed I could, pushing my body beyond it's limits. Electricity seemed to be pulled up from the ground beneath my feet, crawling up my legs in static bolts. It felt as though my legs were going numb.

“Shit, shit, SHIT, SHIT, SHIT!” I swore loudly. Just a few more yards... a few more feet. I planted my right foot forwards, bringing myself to a skidding stop just as I reached for the door handle of my truck. My hand gripped the chrome handle but just as I did, something brutally painful struck my body. As I opened my mouth to scream, I felt a burning flood of heat rush throughout my entire body.

My whole world seemed to flash a brilliant scheme of colors, yet I could still feel my body... feel it being stretched apart, warped...

* * *

The air was muggy and humid, the dark forest seemed calm and still as I lay there on the ground, face down. The sleeves on my M81 camouflage jacket were rolled up, allowing wet moisture to dampen my arms and give my skin an uncomfortable feeling.

As the cool dampness seeped into my matching cargo pants, I groaned and tried to roll over. Dirt and muddy grit was smeared onto my face as I continued to slowly roll onto my back. I groaned painfully as I finally flopped over. ‘Whatever that was… I don’t want to do it again,’ I thought to myself. I moved my right hand over my face and tried to wipe away the grit and sticky wetness, only managing to smear it more. The slimy ground residue clung to my hands like some sort of viscous snot booger...

* * *

Derreck's perspective...

I roared as I sat up, waking abruptly from my dream... his dream. The razor sharp, metallic, claws had erupted from between my knuckles when I woke, sticking out to their full length and dripping blood. I sat their for a moment before retracting them and looking to my side, where Nightmare had been earlier...

Only to realize it was just a dream. She hadn't really been here, and I hadn't been in a warm cuddly field with her. I was in a shitty room in Manehatten, one that was above a sleazy strip joint...

“Ugh...” I groaned as I flicked a cockroach off my arm. “Fucking place...” I groaned. I was originally going straight home, to Nightmare, but ended up taking a detour through Manehatten to stop and chat with Mr. Leone... then ended up being a bouncer for one of his, as he put it, nightclubs. Just for a few days. Said he had problems with the riff-raff lately and was hoping I could put an end to drunks harassing his 'Mares'... prostitutes, who doubled as dancers.

I stood up, the musk of sex and alcohol filling the air. I remembered back when Evan and I first arrived. I thought this world was all rainbows and sunshine... now I see the darker side... the bruise on the face of Equestria, hidden beneath all that makeup...

* * *

Third person...

Thick fumes of smoke filled the air of the main floor. A mare danced around on a stage, twirling around on a pole and had several rubby-dub stallions tossing bits at her, both regular bits and Luna bits.

The bartender served several drinks to already intoxicated ponies, some of which were polluted beyond comprehension. Some ponies mingled by themselves, having waitresses bring them drinks to their own tables, while some received private dances.

The backdoor to the club opened and a mare walked through. She had a cloak covering her figure. A small glint of light escaped from the confines of her clothing and she quickly pulled the cloak further over her body, concealing the blade as she walked into the club.

She took a quick scan of the area before heading to the bartender. Stepping up to the counter, she waited for a moment as he served a drunken stallion, who shortly after being served, puked beside himself.

She pulled back the hood of her cloak, revealing her facial features. She was a unicorn with a longer horn than most and a long blue mane with black streaks in it. Her eyes were a lighter shade of blue and her fur was soft and blood red.

“Excuse me,” she called out to the bartender. “Can you help me?” she asked and he nodded, pointing over to a door.

“Dressing room is that way,” he told her and she perked a brow.

“Excuse me?” she replied back in slight confusion.

“The dressing room... you're a dancer right?” he asked and the mare took immediate offense to the question.

“I am not some sleazy strip dancer!” she snapped and the stallion just exhaled with a roll of his eyes.

“Well... whatever you wanna call yourself, the dressing room is that way,” he commented and she scowled to herself.

“No! It's not like that. I'm looking for somepony,” she told him and he perked a brow.

“Ohh... well... huh-huh... okay, I can call a mare over. She's a really good one, and does the whole... female on female kinda stuff,” he replied back with a wink and again she was disgusted by his comments.

“No you idiot! I'm looking for a... a male, just let me explai-” but he cut her short.

“Hun... this is a stripclub... and I don't have any male dancers. But... for you... I could service you,” he said with a toothy smile.

“GUH! You perverted scumbag! I'm looking for this... they call him Burdy... err, Evan,” she informed him and he sighed.

“Well... I don't have any Evans... but I do have a Burdy,” he smirked and she gave him a simple, most unimpressed look. “Okay fine... but seriously lady, why did you come to a stripclub looking for a stallion to... ohhhhh...” he thought to himself, realizing that most stallions would come to his place in look of some action. The mare spoke up.

“So... do you know where this guy is? Word on the street is he came this way. He's a bigger kinda guy, and they say his friends call him Burdy... or 'The White Skull'. Apparently he can really knock some heads if need be,” she told him and he rubbed his chin.

“Nah... don't got no folks like that,” he told her and she dipped her head, cursing to herself. A shrew of cheers erupted near the dance stage as a mare came trotting out, dressed in western wear.

The cloaked mare took a look as the mare on stage started her act, dancing around erotically and really getting the crowd going. She twerked her bottom, flicking her tail to the sides and letting the crowd get a look at her rump, her nethers barely covered by her skimpy skirt and panties The bartender chuckled. “Ha... and I thought it was going to be a slow night,” he mentioned as the mare took to the pole, making some of the stallions pant and drool while tossing mainly Luna bits onto the dance stage.

The red mare just scoffed, turning her attention back to the bartender. “Do you know anything about him... where he could be?” she asked but the bartender just shrugged.

“I dunno... but yah wanna watch somethin' funny?” he asked but the mare shook her head.

“No.” She turned to leave but the bartender tapped her on the shoulder, gaining her attention. He rose a brow and pointed back to the stage. The mare on stage moaned lewdly as she lay on her back, sliding her moist panties off and flinging them into the crowd, two drunken stallions briefly fighting over them before one finally rose victorious.

The mare spread her legs wide as she continued her dance and the victorious stallion went to interrupt it, going to claim what he assumed was his for the taking. A whistled echoed out over the howls of the crowd, taking the drunk stallion's attention to a lone, dark figure nearby.

The dark figure shook his head then nodded to one side. The stallion shuddered then tossed the mare back her panties. She giggled gingerly then lassoed the stallion around the neck with her rope before slowly crawling forwards. The stallion stood still, completely hypnotized by the mare as she planted a wet, sloppy kiss against his lips.

She spun around and fluffed her tail beneath his chin, making him go light headed and lean forwards as she crawled away, giving him the briefest glance of what he could never have. As her tail trailed along under his chin, she slipped it away and the stallion flopped down, slamming his chin off the rail of the dance stage.

The bartender chuckled and he directed the red mare's attention to the terrifying presence whom was sitting by himself with more than a few dozen empty glasses. “You want somepony... err, a guy, who can knock heads? You talk to him. His name... is Derreck,” the bartender mentioned and she gave him a nod.

Just because he could frighten a drunk stallion by just looking, didn't mean he was a good fighter, but she was willing to check. She walked up to the figure's lone table. He was leaned back, hands resting behind his head and cowboy boots kicked up on the table.

“You here to try and kill me?” he asked and she was taken back by the question.

“W-what? N-no. Why would you ask?” she replied and he chuckled, taking his feet off the table and sitting upright.

“Because you don't belong here... you stick out like a sore thumb,” he mentioned and she blinked in confusion.

“I-I-I do?” she stammered and he nodded, leaning forwards and taking a sniff of her neck.

“Yeah. You do. I could smell your perfume the moment you walked in. Everyone else uses the cheap brand shit... And besides...” he trailed off and tilted his head, the mare following his look. In a flash his right hand grabbed at her. She barely had time to gasp but before she knew what was happening, he had unsheathed her knife and lodged it into the tabletop.

“Not many ponies around these parts have a fine, tempered steel, cutting blade... with pearlized grips... seems more like something an assassin would have but...” he stroked his finger down the engraved grips and blade which had writing written down it, writing which he couldn't read.

“Engravings give you no tactical advantage whatsoever. So who are you?” he asked, prompting the mare to take a seat. She took her seat and spoke.

“Evan?” she asked but he shook his head.

“Wrong answer bub. I know who Evan is, and you ain't him,” he said, breaking her out of thought.

“Oh, snap, sorry. I uhh, I meant, are you... Evan?” she asked and he grumbled, leaning forwards and snorting.

“Who-are-you?” he asked slowly, and most clearly. She shivered in fear from the tone of his voice.

“O-oh... uhh... heh-heh, sorry I uhh... lost in...” she met his terrifying gaze, yet, due to the lighting, couldn't make out his facial features... all she knee is that his one eye was glaring at her. “Echo! Echo Jewel!” she sputtered out. “My name is Echo Jewel and... I uhh... I'm looking for Evan,” she stated and the big man leaned back.

“Go on, Echo Jewel,” he told her.

“Well... you said you knew where he was and... I need his help with something,” she told him and he perked a brow.

“What kind of something?” he asked.

“Well... the kind of something I need a legendary warrior's help for. The rumors... err, the tales told about him... about 'The White Skull'-” she was cut short.

“Dammit... I wanted to be called The Punisher but nooooOOOOoooo... guy wears a white skull on his shirt, they call him The White Skull,” Derreck mentioned, putting Echo into slight confusion.

“Wha-what... I thought... hold on, are you Evan?” she asked but Derreck shook his head and pulled the duster coat to one side, revealing his black undershirt beneath with a white skull on it.

“No... I'm the... infamous, White Skull,” he told her.

“But I thought... wait, who are you?” she asked and he grunted.

“I just told you. The White Skull. Evan is... gone away for a little while. So I'm taking his spot,” he told her. “So... you need a legendary warrior's help... for what?” he asked.

“A stallion took something from me. I need to get it back,” she told him and he rose a brow.

“That sounds... rather lax. Call the police,” he told her but she sighed.

“I can't just call the police. He's hiding out in Sunset Hollows. If you think Manehatten is bad then-” Derreck cut her short.

“I know the place. The run down town, classified as a ghost town, forgotten by all, but is bustling with a gang of mismatched rejects from society... the very best don't yah know?” he told her. “And near the west coast of Equestria no less... aka, a long fucking walk from Manehatten,” he told her.

“Well... see, that's where your... uhm... the big motorized carriage thingy of yours comes in handy,” she mentioned but Derreck just scoffed.

“She's out of service for the time being. Even if Juggernaut did work... I don't hunt down ponies over theft,” he told her.

“You have to! If he gets away with this, he's going to destroy Equestria!” Echo told him frantically but Derreck just shrugged.

“So what is it, this thing, he stole... and if it's so bad it could destroy Equestria, why'd you have it in the first place?” Derreck responded.

“I'm a scientist... or rather, I was. Liquid, the stallion I'm after, we worked together in the science labs, creating magnificent things. But he soon lost track of what was good, and tricked me into building a weapon... a weapon which he stole and is going to use to destroy all of Equestria,” she told him and he just leaned back.

“So this... weapon. It's... what is it? A bomb?” he asked but she shook her head.

“No, no it's... uhh... it's a uhm...” she trailed off and Derreck just shrugged it off.

“Forget it lady. Tell the royal guards. They'll handle this,” Derreck told her.

“There's no time! If we don't hurry, he'll set it off and everything will end!” she yelled and Derreck just shook his head.

“Then what is it?” he asked and she fumbled with her words.

“Well, you see it's... well it's kinda hard to explain cause... well it kinda works like... it'll kill ponies of a certain gene code of his choosing... yah, yah that's it. Not like unicorns or pegasi in general, more like... ponies with... ugh, it's hard to explain to ponies without scientific knowledge. I'm trying to put it in words you'd understand,” she said, Derreck grunting.

“A biological weapon,” he mentioned and she nodded.

“Y-yeah... uhh, yeah, that's it. It's a genetic virus that specifically targets-” but Derreck cut her short.

“I don't give a shit. You wouldn't have enough money to pay me to do this,” he told her and she gasped.

“What?! But you're The White Skull. The long arm of justice! The one who punishes evil! Why won't you help save Equestria in it's darkest hour?!” she cried out and he shrugged.

In the back of his mind, a voice picked up. 'She could be telling the truth Derreck. Equestria could really be in trouble. We should at least see,' Evan told the big man who just shook his head.

“Call the guards. Tell them what you just told me. They'll get to it faster than I ever could,” he told her. "Or the Elements of Harmony. Whoever you tell, I don't care. Just stop telling me your problems."

“50,000... in cash. Plus, you'll be doing the world a favor,” she told him but he just snickered.

“No,” he told her and she bit her lip.

“Listen... I might not even be able to get to Canterlot to tell the royal guards. Liquid has sent assassins after me,” she told him frantically and Derreck just laughed.

“First you need my help cause a stallion stole something from you... then it turns out that something is a biological weapon that could destroy Equestria... then you offer me a huge sum of cash... now it's... you can't tell the guards or police because he's sent assassins after you. So what's next? The science lab you were working at never reported it because-” she cut him short.

“Because we developed it in secret. He burned his office and all the records of our experiment after he took the samples,” she told him and Derreck nearly burst into laughter.

“Ohh... oh goddess that's good. THAT'S RICH! Bwahahahahaha! Oh goddess yes! Kid... you shoulda been a comedian,” he laughed before promptly getting serious. “Kid... let's get one thing straight. Equestria is not in danger. And I'm not the kind of person to track down a lowly thief across continent. I-will-not-help-you!” he said right in her face.

She sat for a moment in silence, completely baffled by what she was hearing. “Tch... I can't believe it. This whole time... all the legends... no, not even legends, just rumors... they were all false. You're no hero. You're just a measly bouncer at a sleazy strip club in Manehatten. You're a coward. You're not even scary,” she commented as she retrieved her blade and went for the door. Derreck called out to the bartender for another shot as Echo neared the door.

Just as she reached the door, she accidentally bumped into a stallion. “Sorry ma'am. Here, let me get that for you,” he apologized politely before holding the door open for her.

“Thanks,” she gave him a nod of courtesy as she left, the stallion also leaving out the door. Derreck peered to the door just as it shut, thinking to himself, Evan's voice calling out to him.

“Derreck... we're not doing anything. Hell, we're just drinking. Would it hurt to take a look?” he asked and Derreck nodded.

“Yes... it would hurt... a lot,” he commented as he downed his shot glass of vodka.

Outside, Echo trotted down the back alley leading out of the club, cursing to herself. From behind her called a voice, the one of the stallion whom had held open the door for her. “You know... it's dangerous for a pretty mare like yourself to walk out at night, all alone.”

Echo turned to him, still trotting away. “Sorry bud, you'll have to think of a better pickup line than that,” she commented, figuring him to be another vagrant drunk from the club.

He let out a sigh. “Well... damn... too bad. That was the best one I had. Guess we'll just have to take you out now then,” he commented.

“Who's we-” Echo was cut off as a thick, burly stallion slammed into her side, bashing her against the brick wall of the alleyway.

She went for her knife but a second stallion jumped at her, punching her hard in the gut. With the wind knocked out of her, she wheezed and doubled over, falling completely into the burly stallion's grip. A third attacker joined in and grabbed her knife, disarming her completely.

The bigger stallion threw her to the ground, her body slamming off the hard pavement with a THUMP! The stallion with Echo's knife went for the kill but the original stallion called out.

“HEY! Don't kill her just yet! I like my mares warm and living,” he told them, the big stallion calling out in a dopey voice.

“But boss... Liquid said we gotta kill her right away.” His voice betrayed his rather low intelligence.

“I don't care what Liquid said! I want a piece of that ass before we kill 'er, a'right?!” he cursed at them. “Now hold her still, it'll only take a minute before she stops fighting back,” he ordered them.

Echo squirmed in their grip as the stallion walked up, pulling the flaps of his own cloak to the side and revealing his already erect phallus. The stallion went in for what he so desired but she kicked at him, one of the stallions quickly grabbing her hindlegs which she then tried painfully to hold together but the bigger stallion pried them apart for their leader.

The lead stallion ripped off her cloak, shredding apart it's silky fabric as he did so. “Damn... looks tight... won't be when I'm done though!” he laughed as he aligned himself over her.

There was a cough from down the alley. “Ahem... colts,” called out a burly voice, gaining all the stallions' attention. “Didn't your mamas ever tell you not to hit a mare?” his deep voice echoed in the alley.

He tipped up his cowboy hat, revealing his facial features for the first time that night. “Maybe I'll have to refresh your memories...” he trailed off as he cracked his knuckles. The big stallion stood up and rushed at him.

“I'm gonna hurt you bad!” he said and Derreck chuckled, stepping into a defensive stance.

“Oh, I'm sure you will,” he stated as the stallion went to ground tackle him. In a flash of movement however, Derreck sidestepped the stallion and tripped him. As the big hulk of muscle fell however, Derreck hammered a punch into the stallion's chest and sent the stallion hurtling back towards the group of would-be assassins.

The muscly stallion stood back up and charged the big man once again. This time however the big man let the stallion plow into him but held his body rigid, not even moving an inch from the hit.

The stallion gasped just as the big man grabbed the back of his head then shoved his face into the brick wall, crushing his skull.

The man looked back to the group who seemed rather stunned. “I love hitponies... whatever I do to you scumbags, I won't feel bad,” Derreck told them. The one with Echo's knife let out a yell as he charged forwards, swinging the blade wildly.

Derreck dodged each swing with a tilt of his body, never once having to use his hands or arms to block a swing. The stallion tried for a stab and Derreck grabbed the pony's wrist, twisting it before hammering it back into the stallion's throat.

The stallion tried to gasp but only managed a gurgle as blood filled his lungs and he collapsed to the ground in a growing pool of his own blood. The leader stallion stepped forwards, his cloak once again shrouding his body.

The last stallion looked to the battle, his attention drawn away from Echo. Taking advantage of the opportunity, she jammed her horn into the stallion's neck, trying to aim for the same place she had seen Derreck stab with her knife.

Her horn impaled the stallion's throat and caused him to gasp, gaining the lead stallion's attention. With his attention drawn away, Derreck moved like lightning, drawing out Evan's favored Desert Eagle and snapping a quick shot at the leader's right front leg.

In a crimson of blood, the stallion's leg was blown clean off, severed at the elbow. He let out a howling scream that was silenced by a second gunshot, one which tore off his hind left leg, making him scream all the more.

Derreck walked up and stepped on one of his stumps, making him scream in utter agony. Drawing the sights of his handgun to the stallion's head, he spoke. “Take it off,” he said, motioning to his cloak which was beginning to soak in blood. Derreck took his foot off the stallion's stump to allow him to remove the attire.

The stallion, through grunts of pain, managed to speak. “What?” he whimpered.

“Fine coat like that... and you're bleeding all over it. Besides, you ripped up her's... so yah gotta pay her back. Take it off,” he told him once more. The stallion, rather painfully, removed the cloak.

Derreck knelt down. “So... where's your boss?” he asked and the stallion just winced and refused to speak. Cracking the hilt of the handcannon's grip across the stallion's jaw, Derreck made his question all the more clear. “I can blow off your boys... or you can tell me,” he said and the stallion was quick to speak as he felt the cold chrome barrel of Belladonna press against his testicles.

“Sunset Hollows... he's... Sunset Hollows,” the stallion gasped in pain. Derreck nodded.

“Thanks,” he thanked the pony before putting the barrel to the hitpony's head and blowing it clean off, spewing crimson across the alley behind the pony's body. Echo was left in complete shock, having never in her life seen something so grotesque and sudden.

Derreck grabbed the four bodies, dispensing them all into a nearby dumpster before tossing her the spare cloak. “Rule number one... ponies are gonna die,” he told her in a deep voice.

“Huh?” she asked in confusion.

“Well... you wanted my help... now I'm willing. But I got rules, and the first one is... ponies are going to die,” he told her.

“But wait... why all of a sudden are you willing to help me?” she asked in further confusion.

“When a random mare approaches me and says someone stole something from her, and that something is a weapon that can end Equestria but she can't go to the authorities, yet she'll offer me a slew of money to help get it back... I'm left a little suspicious about who she truly is... but these guys stood out like a sore thumb in the bar. They were watching you the entire time and left the moment you left... and his story matches up with yours... so now I'm willing to help finish this puzzle, but are you?” he asked, wiping the blood off her horn and face. She blinked for a moment before her brain registered everything. She nodded to him.

“Yes... but we'll have to hurry. When Liquid doesn't hear back from these guys, he'll start to get paranoid,” she told him but Derreck just smirked as they started out of the alleyway.

“Don't worry bout that, I got it covered,” he told her and she perked a brow.

“I thought you said your motor carriage was out of service?” she asked and he nodded as they left the alleyway.

“It is... but it's not the only one,” he said as they walked out onto the dim streets of Manehatten. He pulled a set of keys from his pocket and thumbed a button. Down the street, parked by the curb, a big, sleek car beeped in response, it's headlights flashing briefly as the vehicle was unlocked.

The car was of steel construction, gleaming brightly in the night moon. Much to Derreck's disappointment, Flim and Flam hadn't made a perfect copy of the Gran Torino. It still held heavy inspiration from the Gran Torino, but the back was angled more like that of a Chevelle SS as opposed to the longer mid 70s Gran Torino trunk. It also had small bits that looked more like that of a Dodge Charger, namely the taillights, among a few other things. The rest of the car however, doors, fenders, grill and hood, all took inspiration from the Torino.

It was bright red, with a white streak down each side. “This thing... will get us there... fast,” Derreck told Echo who walked over and ran her hoof down the front fender of the muscle car. It was so smooth that her hoof just glided along without much friction.

“Wow...” Echo mentioned and Derreck smiled.

“Real piece of Equestrian machinery. Flim and Flam made it for me. I call her-”

Author's Note

So, a long time ago me and another author did a roleplay, nothing serious at the time, but then it actually did get serious and he asked me if I could/would include it in the story. At first I had no idea how I'd ever make it tie into the story seeing as how I'm in the late stages of the story, but then I figured out a way. So mind me while we take a slight detour. Oh, and I got a new toy, sorry about the video resolution, but it's f*%king awesome!

Chapter 64

'The master and the apprentice...'

Echo trotted along, her companion close by her side. The warm and gentle summer breeze graced itself through her fur, ruffling it slightly. Her longer hair breezed to the side with the gentle gusts of wind.

She looked to her companion. Strong, determined, powerful. She felt safe with him at her side, as though he'd protect her through anything and everything. That he, and he alone, could make the world stop, time itself slowed to nothing... just for her.

She stopped for a moment. Her friend took a few steps forward before stopping as well, his ear twitching and flapping slightly before he turned back to her, his eyes glinting slightly as he looked to her with a friendly smile, his toothy grin a nearly goddessly white.

“Something wrong?” he asked but she shook her head.

“No, nothing. Just wondering is all,” she responded and he perked a brow, taking a step closer.

“Wondering what?” he replied.

“What it is you do?” she asked, only making him chuckle.

“Well... ah-ha-ha, you know what I do,” he replied, his charismatic smile seemingly everlasting.

“Well, I know but... why?” she asked, making him close his eyes, his smile fading but still there in the faintest of forms as he exhaled.

“To make the world a better place. To help others... I suppose that's reason enough,” he replied. This time it was her that took a step towards him, closing the gap as she looked up into his deep, heart filled eyes. The stallion before her tilted his head slightly so that their faces were perfectly parallel.

“But, for what reason? What, or who, drives you, inspires you to follow this path?” she asked. He looked to her, a soft expression on his face as his eyes started to flutter shut and he began to lean forwards.

“I think I already found her,” he whispered. She felt her heart skip a beat but her body moved on its own, leaning towards him as her own eyes closed. She could feel his breath against her mouth. Just before their lips touched, her body was doused with a shuddering chill...

* * *

“GWAHHH!” Echo gasped, her hind hooves kicking slightly from the icy feel of cold air as she tucked her hindlegs back under the blanket.

She shuddered, shivering just ever so slightly before exhaling rather deeply. A large fume of vapor left her mouth, indicating it was quite cold outside. “Uhh... huh?” she asked out loud, still a little disoriented from the sudden awakening.

She didn't quite remember falling asleep, nor with a blanket. A rather strong musk, like body odor of some sort, reached her nostrils. She sniffed again and realized the source. Her blanket wasn't a blanket but rather a brown duster coat.

She quickly discarded the duster but nearly regretted it as her body was hit with a tidal wave of cold air, to which her teeth began to chatter slightly. Looking around, she took note that she was laying across the back bench seat of Derreck's car, of which the windows were all frosted over.

She shivered feverishly, almost wishing she hadn't tossed aside the warm duster coat. Irregardless, she knew she needed to get up at some point and that cold December days weren't going to get much warmer than it currently was. She looked to the front seat and took note that Derreck wasn't present.

“Where did you go?” she asked herself vocally before hopping up to the passenger side and attempting to exit the vehicle. With light piercing its way through the frost, she figured it was at least morning time.

She tried to open the door but found it would barely budge. “Ugh... hey!” she gasped as she gave the door another shove, but to no avail. Quickly rolling down the window, she took a look outside and gasped. The car had sank into the ground where they had parked the night before, the muddy soil beneath them starting to slowly swallow the vehicle, itself now sunk past the axles and just partly way up the door, which was the cause of difficulty for opening it.

“Darn... ugh... what am I going to do?!” she asked herself as she crawled out the window space. Hopping down to the ground, she realized it was now quite hard, unlike when they parked it and the soil was mucky and wet. In fact, there was even frost on the ground now, yet despite being December there was still a lack of snow.

It only took a few seconds for her to spot Derreck, but gasped when she finally saw him. He was knelt down, sitting on the back of his legs, facing the sun... butt naked. “Derreck!” she called out, rushing over to him. As she got close, she realized his body has shrunk in size, rather noticeably too.

“Derreck?” she called from behind him, not daring to step in front of the naked man. “Derreck, are you insane?! It's freezing out!” she told him but he answered with a calm voice that stunned her beyond belief.

“No... you just can't feel nature's warmth,” he answered, his voice and response throwing her into a world of confusion.

“Wha... hey... are you feeling alright?” she asked, leaning forwards just slightly to take a look at his face, only to be shocked when she saw he looked completely different. His scars were gone, his face was wrinkled just slightly, hair grayed on the sides and a more gentle look of compassion than what she remembered.

“I'm feeling just fine...” he replied in the softest of voices, one which she almost didn't hear but one that almost sounded saddened to his very heart and soul.

“Ugh... yeah well, you wanna get some clothes on, it's colder than the arctic right now,” she replied but the man just shook his head.

“No child... it's rather warm, you just don't understand,” he replied. She was about to object to his apparent insanity but he patted the ground beside himself. “Take off your clothes and have a seat beside me,” he told her but it sounded as though she had the option to decline.

“You're crazy!” she replied but he didn't answer. She bit her lip then figured there would be no real harm in trying. Removing her cloak she took a seat beside him, shivering even more and her breath producing great clouds of visible vapor.

“Relax... calm your body and mind... feel the sun and embrace it,” he told her. She closed her eyes and tried to focus on clearing her mind but in the end couldn't bear the freezing cold.

“GUH... You're crazy! It's freeze... what in Tartarus” she trailed off and as she looked at him, realized that despite breathing at a regular pace, he produced no fumes of vapor. Any other normal pony, or whatever he was for that matter, would at least produce some form of smoke from the cold, but he didn't. 'Maybe he is serious...' Echo thought to herself.

She blinked then decided perhaps it was worth another try, and if not then she'd just have to get her clothes back on. She resumed her previous posture, facing the sun much like he was. She closed her eyes and began to focus but the man's voice shot through her head, though not vocally... he wasn't actually speaking with his mouth. He was speaking to her through her mind.

'No... no focusing, no thinking. Just nothing. Clear your mind. Become one with nature. Feel the grass without touching it. Be the trees that sway in the wind. The wolf that howls to the moon. The hummingbird that sucks nectar from the plants... the sun that gives life to the world... feel it all and embrace it.'

She tried again but he scolded her, not aggressively or harshly but none the less scolded her. 'No, try not. Do. In trying there is effort and thought. Just release your body, let the world take you, and become one with it.'

She held her eyes closed, letting her mind become numb, senseless...

Suddenly a bead of sweat was rolling off her brow, bringing her back to consciousness. She gasped, jumping up to all fours in complete shock of how hot she felt. “Woah! It's boiling out,” she gasped, just before a cold bluster of wind made her realize differently. Even so, her body had reached a temperature at which the cold air outside wasn't much bother for the time being, so long as she put her clothes back on.

Before she went to speak with Derreck, she noticed the sun was much higher than it was before. “Yes... we have been sitting together for more than a few hours,” he told her as he rose.

She put a hoof over her eyes. “Put some clothes on would yah?” she told him then remembered the coat she had slept with. “Your coat's in the back seat,” she informed him and he nodded.

“I know. You were shivering last night, so I covered you with it. Sorry about the smell,” he replied. She lifted her hoof slightly to take a brief look at him.

“Thanks, I-” she cut herself off as she realized he looked nothing like Derreck other than he stood on two legs and shared the same skin complexity. “Y-you're... you're not Derreck,” she replied and he nodded.

She took note of the black diamond ring he wore around one of his fingers, the holy necklace around his neck and his-

“YOU'RE EYE!” she gasped, looking to his uncovered eye which was fogged a deep white, damaged beyond repair. He nodded.

“My name is Evan. He is Derreck,” he replied, pointing to his side where there stood nothing. She cocked her head and rose a brow. Just before she could speak however, his body began to shift, several burning flashes slicing down his face and returning his body to the way she remembered him before.

His hulking mass stood before her, also naked but looking much younger, much stronger, and much more intimidating and terrifying. “Evan and I are one in the same. The Ying and the Yang. The light and the darkness. Without one there cannot be the other... I can show you,” he told her, confusing her slightly.

“Show me what?” she asked.

“See what I see. Feel what I feel. Everything,” he told her. She sighed and just nodded her head, figuring she might as well, considering the weird sun trick she had just learned.

“Okay, yeah sure, lay it on me. Show me,” she replied. Without much warning however, he grabbed her by the shoulders, heaving her up and pressing his lips to hers. She gasped in fright, pulling back and yanking herself away, shaking her head before looking to him.

Her eyes flashed a bright aura of colors before simmering and returning to her regular tint. “WHAT THE HAY DO YOU THINK YOU'RE... woah! There's two of you,” she stated, the man nodding as she stared upon both of them. Both men looked so different yet so the same. She was taken into complete shock as she looked at them before finally realizing something.

“Ugh... put some clothes on already!” She gasped, realizing she was staring at two nude males. Evan dressed himself in a white set of robes, finely woven together. Not too tight but not loose fitting.

Derreck on the other hand slipped into a jet black set of fatigues. They looked tight, but not uncomfortably so. The suit hugged his curves but it was obvious that the fabric was rather thick, perhaps an inch all the way around, and stretchy as well. The thick weave gave the suit a muscly appearance and covered every inch of his body below his neck.

It gave him an even more terrifying appearance. Echo stepped forwards, interested in his new suit but didn't get a very good look as he slipped on a black duster coat over top. Both men took out an eye patch and slipped it over their damaged eye in almost identical fashion. She looked to them both. One was dressed in a dark shade while the other was a brighter hue. The light... and the darkness.

“OH NO!” Echo gasped as she realized the original reason she had began to look for him this morning. “The car is sunk!” she told them and Evan gasped as he rushed over, kneeling down and looking at the car in distress. He at first tried pushing it and heaving it but his attempts were futile.

Derreck walked over rather calmly as Echo rushed to Evan's side to try and help. “No worries, she's a unicorn,” Derreck mentioned and Echo looked to him, as though he was stupid.

“Yeah, so? What's that supposed to mean?” she asked, as though he was implying something, which he truly was.

“Use your magic. Levitate it out of the ground,” he replied as though it was a rather simple, almost subconscious, task.

“I can't. Are you crazy, it's huge and heavy,” she told him but he merely chuckled.

“Size should mean nothing to you. Whether it be a leaf, or the tree it fell from. A rock or a mountain. A drop of water or the lake. Only in your mind, does size matter. Dig deeply. Find your greatest emotion, your anger, your hatred... your vengeance. Let it drive you, let it guide you... and with that vengeance let it empower you,” he told her, making her rather confused.

He set his hand on her shoulder, covered in the leathery fiber weave that the rest of his suit was constructed of. “I can feel it... sense it deep within you. Unleash it... and let it rise the vehicle up,” he told her.

He waved his hand towards the car. “Hate is considered a powerful word, because it has powerful meaning. And with great power...” Echo faced the car and lowered her horn, glowing with a powerful aura.

She clenched her eyes shut and focused all her power around the vehicle then dug deep. In the back of her mind she heard shouting... screaming... crying... then nothing. She flinched, her lower section twitching in pain just moments before a deep burning anger started to arise within herself.

Her teeth gritted together as her eyes clenched harder, a lone tear trickling down her cheek. Grunting she began to force herself, force the magic, to try and lift the vehicle. Derreck crossed his arms as Evan exhaled and the duo watched the mare struggle.

The car budged and shifted slightly but only just before Echo gasped and collapsed. “I can't... it's too heavy... I'm just a unicorn.”

“Then that is why you fail.” Derreck's hand shot out, palm facing downwards and hand open, fingers all pointing towards the car. His arm was loose, relaxed, as was the rest of his body. He gently closed his eyes as a plain expression went across his face.

Turning his hand, his palm faced upwards and with it the car started to creak and groan, then slowly and most effortlessly it rose up from the ground, clearing the surface by a good few feet and was levitated over to more solid soil.

Echo watched in absolute shock as she witnessed the event. As the big man set down the vehicle, the trio walked over, Echo baffled. “H-how... you don't even have a... a horn,” she stated and Derreck just shook his head.

“You needn't a horn, to perform miracles,” he told her and she looked to Evan.

“Can he do these kinds of things too?” she asked but Derreck shook his head.

“Evan has chosen his own path. He loves... her cherishes... he cares. His love does however, conflict him in many ways. But even so, he has learned all he possibly can but...” he trailed off and looked to the distance. “Love is not, and never will be, as strong as anger... hatred... and vengeance. For hate is a truly powerful semblance,” he told her.

She was taken away in confusion but then asked her mind. “Can you show me?” she asked and a smile crept across his face.

“You are still young. You haven't learned to harness your power and fuel it with emotion. I can teach you, but you must give me your word you will do as I do, learn what I teach, see what I see, feel what I feel... and with it, you can become more powerful than you could ever imagine,” he told her and she nodded.

“Yes. Teach me,” she told him and he nodded, opening the passenger door.

“It's a long way to Sunset Hollows.” She stepped into the vehicle as did Derreck who attempted to start the vehicle but it refused to spark to life.

“Dammit!” he cursed and she turned to him. “Engine's too cold. Doesn't wanna turn over,” he told her.

“Well... can't you just do something? Hate it or whatever?” she asked, figuring he could use this great power of hatred he kept talking about to make it start. He was about to answer but Evan leaned forwards from the back seat.

“Wait...” he trailed off, making Echo wonder how the man got in the backseat without her knowledge. There was only two doors to the vehicle, and she and Derreck were the first ones inside.

Evan leaned forwards, kissing the tips of his right index and middle finger before pressing them to the steering wheel. Around his fingers started to warm up, and the heat merely spread from there, the loving warmth soon defrosting the windows and making the car drip with condensation as though the vehicle had been sitting in a sauna.

“That's... that's impossible...” Echo gasped, Evan murmuring to her as he leaned back into his seat.

“Hatred may not be as powerful as you think...”

* * *

Twilight walked along, rather solemnly and feeling lonely, as she had the past few months. Gloomy beyond belief. Despite he friend's support, she felt a great emptiness inside herself that she refused to address.

Rarity walked alongside her, speaking of how she was in the process of creating a wonderful coat that would keep the wearer warm yet wasn't cumbersome and also, most importantly, it had style.

Twilight sighed, Rarity's speech stopped mid stride. “Darling, what ever is the matter?” she asked, Spike, whom stood on her other side, also speaking up.

“Yeah Twilight, you seem really down. What's up?” he asked, trying to comfort her.

“Nothing. It's just... nothing,” she sighed, Rarity exhaling deeply.

“Darling, you must forget about that lumbering oaf. Either that or reconcile with him. Being gloomy all the time is not going to solve anything.” A tear ran down Twilight's cheek, dripping off and turning to an icy droplet before shattering against the hard ground.

“I just... I can't... but I can't forgive him for what he did either,” she replied, this time it was Spike who interjected.

“Yeah but Twilight, he wasn't that bad. Yeah he did bad things but it was always for the better. He didn't just kill those ponies because he felt like it. He did it to-” Twilight rushed off, not wanting to hear another word about the man. Spike sighed, knowing that talking about him never helped and always resulted in Twilight rushing off in tears. “Great... guess I sound like Dash now...” he muttered to himself, remembering all the times Dash had tried to remedy the situation.

Rarity stepped up beside the dragon, flicking the plush scarf around her neck to the side. “Yes darling, but she needs to understand. She can't live her entire life conflicted about it. She has to chose... and I just hope when she does, it isn't too late-” she was cut off as a stallion pushed his way between the two, making the mare stumble a bit, in which her hoof got tangled and she tripped on it. Spike rushed to her aid and helped her back up. Rarity spat out in irritation.

“Hey! Watch where you're going!” she shouted and the stallion turned, snickering to himself.

“You got in my way. Why don't you watch where you're standing? Or better yet, dress in something other than those hideous rags,” he shot back, rather rudely and quite snidely. Spike stood between the two, facing the stallion.

“Apologize for that!” he snapped and the stallion just scoffed.

“Or what? Are you gonna tell mommy? OooOOOoooh, I'm so scared. Word of the wise kid, bug off before I hurt you,” he snapped, going to poke Spike in the chest with his hoof but the young dragon quickly swatted it aside.

The stallion was at first shocked by the dragon's quick and almost instinctive reflexes. He chuckled and went to jab harder but Spike merely sidestepped him, grabbing his hoof and yanking him past his own body while also sticking his foot out and tripping the rude stallion to the ground.

The stallion grunted furiously as he stood back up. “Why you little... okay kid, I'm gonna beat the snot outta yah!” he yelled as he wildly charged forwards. This time Spike grabbed at the stallion as he got close, using a combination of foot movement along with his tail, to flip the stallion onto his back, crashing him down rather hard to the unforgiving ground.

The stallion wheezed as he was winded, Spike stepping back as Rarity spoke up. “That's what you get for trying to pick on poor Spikey Wikey. Maybe you should learn some manners you little brat,” Rarity snapped at him. Spike breathed heavily but gasped as the stallion arose yet again.

“Alright you little shit... I'm gonna kill yah fer that!” he growled vulgarly, wiping his chin before letting out a roar of anger and charging forwards with brutal intent. Spike moved like lightning, delivering a quick, non-lethal, chop to the side of stallion's neck.

The brute gasped, a spew of saliva leaving his mouth as his eyes rolled into the back of his head and he collapsed to the ground, twitching wildly yet still unconscious.

Rarity blinked in utter shock. “Spikey! Darling, are you alright?” she gasped, rushing up to him and grabbing him affectionately.

“Uhh... uhm... yeah, are you?” he asked back, a little blush coming across his cheeks from the embrace.

“But of course darling. Thank you for standing up for me like that. It was the most gentle-coltly thing anypony has ever done for me,” she said before planting a kiss on his cheek, making him blush even deeper. “Why... where did you ever learn to do that?” she asked and Spike rubbed the back of his head.

“Uhm... well... heh-heh... Evan taught me that...”

Author's Note

I don't have much to say, yeah it takes me forever these days to write a chapter, this one was small and seems... I dunno. It just doesn't seem very good. I dunno... I'm sorry I guess (Must be the mood setting?). Oh, but I got a new gun...

PS: Yes I know, me and my guns... terrible habbit

Chapter 65

'Selflessness is a virtue...'

Evan's perspective...

The sun beat down upon us, the soft beach sand spreading through my fingers as I sifted my hands through it. Leaning back, I sighed, relaxed and content.

Moving my hands from my side, I tucked them behind my head and crossed one leg over the other, humming to myself as the wonderful summer sun basked its warmth upon my body. I tapped my one foot to the tune of the beat I was humming.

My humming was interrupted however, as my back arched upwards a little and I let out a rather prolonged yawn. Clucking my tongue several times I stretched out a little more and resumed my lax state.

Just as I began humming again, a splash of water washed down upon me, making me yelp and scurry back.

Taking a look to the lake, I saw the culprit. The lavender alicorn, a smirk plastered across her face as she giggled wildly. A playful smile came across my face as I jumped to my feet, feeling sprightly and young as ever.

“Oh... it's on, you're in for it now!” I laughed, chasing after her. A squeak of joy left her mouth as she galloped down the beach, myself chasing after her. She looked back to me and I took notice her horn was glowing. My brow rose but it was only then I noticed a darkening shadow casting over me. I stopped and looked to my side, only to realize a large tidal wave splashing towards me, coated in a magical aura.

A faint smile tugged at the corner of my lips. 'That's not even fair...' I thought to myself as I was hammered by the wave that dragged me further up shore. I laid there with a risen brow. 'Okay... I see how it is,' I thought to myself as I closed my eyes and laid still, body completely limp.

I heard her giggling coming closer and closer until it stopped. “Evan?” she called out, then again, with a slightly more alarmed tone.

“EVAN?!” she cried out, and with it I felt her presence reach my side. “Nonononono, please don't be... it was just-” I cut her off, opening my eyes and hosing her with a mouth full of water.

“Gotcha,” I chuckled and she lightly hit me on the shoulder. I pulled her into a kiss, both of us struggling to maintain the kiss as we continued to giggle in a playful demeanor.

“You know, we came to the beach and all you've done is sit around,” she mentioned and I nodded.

“I know, it's quite relaxing,” I commented. She gave me a dumbfounded look before grabbing me in a magical hold. “EH! Hey wait, woah-woah-woah-WOAH, HOLD ON!” I yelped before she playfully tossed me in the water, jumping in after me with a gleeful 'YIPPEE!'.

I floated around beneath the surface, a rather unimpressed look on my face. She swarm around in front of me, the sun's rays sparkling through the lake's surface and gleaming upon her body.

Looking to me, she giggled. Several bubbles of air left her mouth as she did so. I exhaled and went to speak, my mouth and lungs suddenly filling with water. 'STILL UNDERWATER!' I thought frantically as I quickly surfaced, gagging and hacking up water.

She laughed at me, quickly paddling closer before taking me into an embrace. I held her close, enjoying the close bond we held. Her soft wet fur against my bare skin... it was more than anypony could ask for.

We let the soft and most gentle tide bring us to shore, laying in the shallow water and sharing the most precious moment.

She bopped her nose into mine, blushing intensely. Eyes fluttering shut, I leaned my face towards hers, connecting our lips. For the longest of times we held the pose, soft lips connected, holding each other while laying in the warm water.

Breaking from the kiss I looked to her, a loving expression on her face. “I love you,” I whispered to her but, as though by a radical force of nature, everything grew dark, and with it the water went icy cold.

“GWAHH... Yikes!” I gasped, shivering intensely. I stood up but noticed my mother did not follow. “M-mom?” I asked hesitantly as she lay in the cold water, face tilted down and looking away from me.

“Why?...” she murmured.

“What?” I asked back in utter confusion. I went to kneel down but she pushed me back, myself falling to my arse in the water. “Guh! Mom?!” I gasped and she turned her head away from me, heavy tears of sorrow dripping down her face as she stood up.

“How... how could you? Just...” she trailed off and rushed away, leaving me alone...

I went to stand but gasped, a sharp pain whizzing through my body. Letting out a yelp of agony, I fell to my knees, gripping at my chest that felt... constricted. I clenched my eyes shut and gasped yet again, a slew of brass tasting liquid leaving my mouth.

“Ahhh... ughhh!” I sniffed and coughed, more of the brassy liquid dripping from my mouth in profuse quantity. I forced open my eyes, but found my left eye severely damaged, a dark red blur hampering my vision. I forced it close but felt blood dripping out from it.

I began to crawl towards shore, but felt a mass of weight holding me down yet... nothing was physically atop of me. I collapsed into the water...

With another gasp I looked to the water... no, it was blood. Dark, red, deathly blood. “Ugh... what?!” I gasped in fright as I tried painfully to drag myself to shore, only to fall short a few feet. I collapsed in the lake of death yet even so the blood never began to drown me... I just sort of... laid there, partially submerged, floating...

A cough left my mouth, more of a gag really, and I finally found the strength to drag myself up to the shoreline. I flopped down in the mud which slimmed across most of my body, my lower half still submerged in the liquid death. “Ironic... isn't it?” asked a steely cold voice.

I let out a grunt of effort as I sat up, a dark figure before me. He was dressed in... a dark, long, tattered trench coat and an equally dark desperado like cowpony hat covered his facial features.

I forced myself to my feet, my full height, which stood nearly a third higher than him, and it was only then I realized he was quadrupedal, though I couldn't actually see his legs as they were covered by his tattered clothing.

“Who... who are you?” I asked, a little softly as I staggered about to try and keep myself up.

“That is not important... but what is important, Mr. Burdick, is you,” he stated and I perked a brow, still panting heavily as blood dripped down my face, leaking out from my eye that bled profusely. Suddenly I felt over a dozen painful wounds open up on my body, making me yelp and cry out in pain and I began to bleed out from the wounds.

I felt blood oozing out from all over my body, leaking into the sand and tainting it. I struggled to keep my footing but only then realized my head was gashed open as well. Looking to the pony... thing, whatever he... it, was, I watched as he walked towards the lake of blood and with that, the blood disappeared and was replaced with clear water.

I staggered over but collapsed a few feet before, having to drag myself the last little bit. “You may walk the world... disguised as an angelic presence... but those among the living cannot see into your soul as I do,” he told me, motioning to the water. “Perhaps, through all the lies you've buried yourself under, not even you can see your true self anymore,” he mentioned.

I dragged myself above the water and looked down upon my reflection, only to gasp in horror. The... image before me... my reflection...

A man looked back at me, his left eye damaged beyond belief, bleeding horribly. Several wounds were slashed across his body, coupled with gunshot wounds. A nasty piece of shrapnel was lodged in his forehead, just above his bleeding eye... but then I realized it...

That was no piece of shrapnel, it was a horn. His damaged eye flashed at me, the pupil vertical and the iris glowing dark red. “And your heart,” the creature beside me spoke. “Is as dark as death itself.”

I looked to the reflection and saw his chest, a large hole blown straight through him but his heart still remained, supported by several dripping arteries. His heart oozed a black oily substance, the organ itself... jet black yet still beating healthily.

“And your time, has finally come,” the voice spoke. I closed my eyes. That couldn't be me... it just couldn't be...

I opened my eyes once more, now finding that both worked in pristine fashion. Beside my deathly reflection was another... a skeleton pony with burning red eyes, a sickly looking scythe raised above his head just as he began to swing it downwards.

“NGH!” I grunted, rolling quickly to the side and dodging the decapitating swing. I crawled to my feet, wiping my lips clean as I panted heavily.

“Hmm, defiant bastard, I'll give you that. But death among mortals is inevitable, so why don't you just accept it?” he asked, beginning to slowly trot towards me. Fear invoked me, penetrating me right to my core. I began to slowly crawl backwards, trying to put distance between us but to no avail.

The bony hooves of the pony gripped around his scythe as he went to swing it again. “NGHUHH!” I gasped, clenching my eyes shut and frozen in fear. 'Was this really it? Was this the end?'

A powerful gust of wind nearly took my body airborne as the ground began to shake violently. I managed to crack open my eyes. Not far off stood Derreck, fists clenched and body tense as ever.

“HOW MANY OF YOU IDIOTS WILL THOSE TWO FOOLS SEND?!” Derreck boomed, his voice crispy and like a boom of thunder. He sighed, exhaling deeply as his body relaxed. “I guess they'll never learn... too bad,” he commented as he walked forwards.

The cloaked pony snarled in his direction. “Stay out of this, it does not concern you!” he growled but Derreck merely chuckled as though this pony was not a threat in the slightest.

“Tell me Death... do you feel pain?” he asked as he stepped between us. The pony, Death, simply walked forwards and tried to push his way past my big friend who grabbed him by the chest.

“Ah-ah-ahh...” Derreck commented before giving Death a shove backwards. “Me first,” he told the bony stallion of death, in a most cocky manner. The stallion reached up with one of his bony front hooves and grabbed his hat, quickly tossing it to the side and revealing his deathly face. Death's eyes glowed red, his teeth razor sharp and a dark smog surrounding his immediate presence.

“So be it...” Death darted forwards, swinging his scythe with deadly proficiency. Derreck just stood there, completely calm about the matter. I clenched my eyes as I heard the wisp of Death's scythe swinging downwards.

For a few moments I kept my eyes shut, but when I didn't hear the thump of a body, it made me curious. I peeked open an eye then gasped and went wide eyed as I looked to the spectacle before me.

In a very casual manner, Derreck had caught the blade of Death's scythe between his index and middle finger and was holding the posture ever so effortlessly. Death grunted, trying to force down the weapon. “WH-WHAT IS THIS?!” Death growled his body shaking in futile effort.

“Your final damnation!” Derreck hissed, pulling the scythe and with it Death as well, in close before hammering him in the chest with a brutal strike from his free hand.

The skeletal incarnation of, whom Derreck called, Death was sent tumbling back while my big friend retained the sickly weapon. Looking upon the scythe, he muttered to himself. “Such a useless form of aggression,” he mentioned before gripping it with immense strength.

I gasped as the entire weapon, handle and all, shattered apart into tiny fragments, no larger than that of granular bits of sand, before being taken away into the breeze that fluttered past. Death now cowered backwards as Derreck slowly walked forwards. “Come now... is that the best you have? Surely those two imbeciles would have sent someone better than the last piece of trash I disposed off,” Derreck commented.

Death scrambled to his hooves and launched himself forwards, hammering a brutal punch against Derreck's face that didn't even make him wince. The strike, as powerful as it seemed to be, didn't even move my friend's face an inch.

“Im... impossible!” Death gasped, his facial expression going dire. Grabbing the stallion by his bony wrist, he began to thrash his body against the ground, slamming him around like a mere rag doll before crushing his body into the mud.

Taking a few steps back, Derreck laughed as Death painfully rose to his hooves. “What's the old saying? Oh yes, a mere touch from Death is supposed to kill me? And yet you can't even manage to do that with a full powered haymaker? You're pathetic,” Derreck taunted, before turning his back to the staggered stallion.

Death took a running charge. “DERRECK!” I yelled out but he didn't seem to mind. Just as Death sprung violently towards my friend he reacted in perfect precision. As though he had eyes in the back of his head, he delivered a perfect elbow strike straight into Death's chest, without even looking back.

The stallion wheezed, still being held airborne by some ungodly force of nature. He hacked and gagged in agonizing pain while my big friend laughed. “So... the legendary Death does feel pain... ironic isn't it?” Derreck mused before pivoting his entire body and delivering a brutally powerful backhand that slammed Death into the ground with enough force to create a small crater around his body.

Hocking back a loogie, Derreck spat right into Death's face. “Next time... if they really want us dead, tell them to send someone worth my time,” Derreck commented before making his way over to me.

I coughed in pain as I tried to stand but found myself unable to do so. Derreck reached down and helped me to my feet, putting one of my arms over his shoulders to keep me up. “Come on, time to wake up. We got things to do, ponies to kill,” he mentioned.

“Wake up?” I asked but didn't get his answer, as there was a deathly hiss racing towards us.

Derreck dropped me, tilting his stance slightly and cursing our aggressor. “YOU'LL FIND THAT EVEN DEATH CAN DIE!” He boomed, tangling his arm around Death's foreleg then tripping him to the ground. With a mighty roar, my big friend cocked back his fist which was quickly enveloped in a red electrical current. With a powerful, ground shaking roar, he hammered down his fist.

The impact shattered Death apart and the resulting shock wave sent me hurtling through the air, my world going dark...

* * *

I awoke with a gasp, followed by a shiver. I grasped at my face, relieved to find myself back as I should be... even if it was alone, at least I didn't have that demonic look I did during my... whatever it was... a dream I guess.

I heard a wheezing cough come from across the room. It took me a moment to focus in but I quickly remembered everything. Derreck and I, accompanied by this mysterious mare, Echo... we stopped at this motel for the night. It was a small town without much to see and Derreck said it'd be safe to sleep here for the night.

Another wheezing cough came from the bed. I stood up, a little staggered but quickly got my footing. “Hey... you okay?” I asked as I made my way over to the bedside.

“Fine, just fine-” Echo was cut off by another hacking cough, followed by sharp, wheezy breathing. “Just a cold,” she grumbled stubbornly. She coughed again, this time it sounded as though her body was trying to get rid of built up mucus.

I put my hand to her chest, which she quickly tried to shoo away. “What are... you doing?” she asked through several coughs.

“Breath normally,” I told her and again she tried to push away my hand. “Stop!” I grabbed her hoof and held it down. Her breathing picked up and aggravated her symptoms. She began to hack and wheeze violently and with it I could feel slight tremors coming from her chest.

“You've got bronchitis,” I told her as I withdrew my hand to which she shook her head.

“No... ack, you've...” she inhaled sharply, followed by more coughing. “It's just a cold,” she insisted. “I won't... slow you... down! Come on, we gotta hurry,” she demanded and I looked to my watch, taking note it was only 2am.

“You've been up all night, haven't you?” I asked, figuring that the sickness had disturbed her sleep. She shook her head and I held her down.

“HEY! LET GO OF ME!” She demanded, kicking and squirming aggressively, only making her symptoms get worse as she began to hack violently.

“Just hold still, I'm not going to hurt you,” I informed her, my left hand pressed just below her neck while my right palm pressed against the broad of her chest. She continued to squirm slightly and gasped as my hand was coated in a blue aura.

“GWUH, hey that's cold!” she squeaked. I felt her... the sickness in her lungs. My arm seemed to bond into her body, making us one for the time being. Then I felt it. The tickling in my lungs... the filling fluids... the raspy breath. I took my hands away from her and she scurried back, away from me.

“What the hay was that?!” she shouted then blinked in confusion as I arose. “Hey... hey I'm all better!” she spoke mostly to herself as she realized her lungs were no longer inflamed and her breathing was once again normal.

“Mmph... gwuh... ack...” I tried to hold my breath to keep back the coughing but couldn't manage and broke down into a fit of wheezing, coughing and gasping for air.

“Uhh... h-hey, what's... what did you do?” Echo asked in confusion.

“I... I... bwa... I...” I tried through sharp, choppy, gasps for air. “Nothing... just... try to get some... sleep...” I rushed off out of the room. Hopefully I could find some kind Eucalyptus oil or something there of...

* * *

Later that morning...

I stood out front, leaning on the front fender of the F&F Gran Torino. I huffed, trying to keep my coughing to a minimal. Finally it became too much. A vast quantity of fluid had built in my lungs, giving me a drowning type feeling of which I couldn't stand and broke down into a fit of coughs and wheezes.

Coughing up a large quantity of excess mucus and fluid, I grunted as the puddle on the ground beneath me grew even larger. All morning I had been coughing and it surprised me to see that the puddle had grown this large. 'Where does this shit come from?' I asked myself quietly.

There was a pat on my shoulder. “Always taking another pony's problems and making them your own huh? Goddess your stubborn... you never learn do you?” Derreck asked and I shook my head.

“I try to be... ack... kack... haaa... ughhahh...” I wheezed up some more of the viscous fluid.

“Mmm... I'll take that as a 'No'.” Derreck mused to himself and I just rolled my eyes. This crap was giving me a headache as well, along with chest pains and raspy breathing that just got worst if I tried to hold it in. When I did breath, there was a tickling sensation that would aggravate me into coughing.

Derreck cocked a brow. “Surprising your healing factor hasn't kicked in and got rid of it yet,” he made note and I nodded. “Like the time that king cobra bit you,” he laughed and I nodded.

“Yeah... and after three agonizing days...” I coughed violently and Derreck finished the story.

“The snake died,” he laughed and I nodded.

“Or that time you slammed a revolving door... ahahahaha... more like smashed it,” I chuckled, wheezing slightly but a bright smile on my face.

“Yeah... they won't let me back in that place eh,” he mentioned, both of us chuckling. “Well... you have fun with Bronchitis, I've got a few things I wanna do,” he said before beginning to walk away.

“Wait... what about Echo? And that stallion?” I asked in a raspy voice. He just smirked.

“In good time, in good time,” and with that he was gone. I grasped at my chest, coughing up what was left in my lungs for the time being. It just sort of... comes out of nowhere... like there's a mystic portal opened in my lungs and someone is pouring this shit in there.

“Ah Derreck... why don't you go start a fire with some ice cubes so I can get warm,” I chuckled with a sigh. That man defied reality... he defies death, and to this day walks the world like a casual person without a single fear. What I'd give to be him.

“Morning,” came a sprite voice. I turned and gave Echo a nod. She came around the side of the vehicle then made a disgusted face as she looked to my puddle of vile fluid. “Gross... did that come from...” she didn't even need to ask. “How did you do it? Take my illness? And why would you put it upon yourself?” she asked, making me chuckle.

“One question... ach... ahem... at a time,” I coughed, my lungs already beginning to fill again. “I just... I dunno. Sometimes it's better to just...” I didn't have the words to explain. “It's good to just be nice,” I replied and she gave me a stupidified look.

“Well... taking another pony's sickness, especially what I had last night, isn't on my to-do list,” she commented and I just shrugged.

“Well... I never said it-” I was cut off as I hacked up more slimy mucus. “Hmm... ahem, well... we're all different,” I replied.

“So where's Derreck?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“Said he needed to do something. I guess he'll just... catch up with us later I suppose,” I replied. I began to walk down the main strip of the small little town, Echo trotting close behind me.

“Where are you going? Shouldn't we be taking that motorized thingy majig?” she asked but I just waved my hand.

“Soon, soon. Just... a little walk,” I coughed again but felt the sickness already starting to subside. About damn time. It kept me up for most of the morning. My cowboy boots treaded lightly across the loose dirt road. My duster coat encased most of my body, the flaps hanging low, far below my knees.

Beneath my coat I dawned a white monk-like robe. It was strange really, I wasn't sure what possessed me to wear such a thing but it kept me warm so I didn't complain... heck, it kinda reminded me of something Obi-Wan Kenobi would wear. 'Jedi robes beneath a cowboy duster, ha!' I thought silently to myself.

“So what are we doing exactly? Is there a reason to this or are we just wasting time?” Echo said hastily and I wavered my hand for her to relax.

“Just enjoying life. If you rush through it in haste... then did you really live?” I asked and she blinked in slight curiosity. “When you're young, you don't really see everything as it is... feel the world... embrace it, let it flow through you,” I told her and she huffed.

“This is ridiculous. Why can't Derreck be here? There's a stallion who could very well destroy the world if we don't hurry and you're here...” she looked to me and sighed. “Sniffing the air?” she asked and I nodded.

“Fresh air, nature's gift. Without it we'd suffocate. You don't really take notice of these things until they're gone. The precious things in life you take for granted...” I trailed off as painful memories of my mother, Twilight, surfaced in my mind. How arrogant I had been in the beginning, how selfish and how much I took her for granted... and now she was gone.

“Yeah well... all of that will be gone if we don't hurry up!” she commented, still hasty as ever. I let out a simple sigh, coughing just ever so mildly.

“Alright then, let's go,” I told her, figuring it was no use arguing. She huffed at my slow pace.

“About time... fresh air,” she scoffed irritably as we headed towards the car. Just as we neared the car, a small colt came skipping around the corner, a nice soft serve ice cream cone in his hoof as he hopped merrily along.

Echo nearly froze, her mouth slightly open. I looked to her and she quickly shook off whatever she had been thinking about. “Something the matter?” I asked and she shook her head.

“No, n-nothing just... who the hay eats ice cream in November?” she asked, but I could tell it wasn't what was bothering her.

“That little colt-” I was cut off as he tripped and time seemed to slow. The poor little colt slowly fell forwards, his ice cream hurtling through the air as he cried out. The ice cream splatted a few feet in front of him and time quickly returned to normal.

“UGH!” I rushed over, Echo grunting and rolling her eyes as she followed. The little colt whimpered as he looked to his ruined ice cream, his mouth quivering in deep sorrow.

“Hey, hey easy kiddo. Don't fret. Where'd you get that?” I asked and he just continued to whimper. “Hey buddy, it's alright, we'll get you another one, how's that sound?” I asked and his ears perked up as his face went from gloomy to bright.

“R-really?” he asked and I nodded.

“Come on, just show us where you got it,” I replied and he stood up, quickly trying to lead us to where he got the treat.

Echo leaned towards me. “You're not serious, are you? His mom would probably just get him another one,” she mentioned but I just shrugged and followed the colt, Echo exhaling rather irritably as she too followed.

The little colt brought us up to an ice cream stand, which was surprising considering it was near freezing temperatures outside. “Right here, right here!” the colt said cheerfully.

I looked to the vendor. “Alright bud, get 'em an ice cream, a big one,” I said and the vendor quickly whipped up quite a large cone.

“Oh come on,” Echo commented. “That thing is like twice the size of the one he dropped,” she mentioned and I nodded, the vendor speaking up.

“That'll be seven bits,” he told us to which I looked at Echo and motioned towards the vendor.

“ME?! Why don't you pay for it? This was your idea,” she countered, much to the young colt's dismay.

“I left my wallet in the car. Besides, I know you're carrying around that sack of bits. What's seven to you?” I stated plainly and she huffed, fishing out a few bits and paying for the treat.

The vendor went to hand it to her but she shook her head. “For the kid-” she was cut off as the young colt grabbed her into a hug.

“THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!” He cried out in joy, holding her tight. Echo's face went wide eyed as her mouth gaped slightly.

The colt hugged just a little tighter before retrieving the ice cream and taking off, trotting along with an unbelievably joyful skip. “I... I... he...” Echo murmured, still shocked as she went to embrace the colt but found he was no longer there.

I patted her on the shoulder with a smile. “Sometimes, the smallest things go the furthest,” I told her...

* * *

Third person...

Echo sat across the campfire from her companion as he played a harmonica. She leaned with her cheek in her hoof, listening to him play. “Is there anything you can't do?” she asked, almost as if entranced by her friend.

“Well...” he said, slowly taking the harmonica away from his mouth. “There are a lot of things that... 'I' cannot do, such as eat my own head,” he mentioned comically, much to the giggling amusement of Echo.

He looked up to the night sky, the moon shining down upon them and the stars sparkling in the sky above. “There is much in life I can teach you,” he told her and she nestled in closer to him.

“I don't need to learn anything though, all I want is for you to love me. You can protect me right?” she asked and her friend just chuckled.

“Well, yes I suppose... but it's always good to learn as well. If you had never pursued a life of science, we'd have never met, so perhaps learning is a vital thing in life, no?” he asked in a very wise manner and she smiled, blushing deeply as she recalled how the duo met.

“As you know, I am an avid martial artist,” he told her and she nodded, completely intrigued and letting herself get lost into his speech. “And there is one such move that almost any artist who practices hoof to hoof combat aspires to learn.” He began to play his harmonica yet again.

“What is it?” she asked and he finished his note before speaking.

“The five step... heart exploding strike technique,” he informed her and she rose a brow.

“And what is this... illusive technique that martial artists aspire to learn?” she asked, curious to his story.

“Well, to put it simply... the user strikes his, or maybe her, opponent in several key spots on their body... mostly pressure points. In doing so, it severely restricts and pinches the main arteries around the victim's heart... and, as the legend goes, when the victim takes five steps, the pressure from the needed blood circulation causes the arteries to erupt and the victim... quietly drops dead. Hence, the five step, heart exploding strike technique.”

Echo was silent as the green stallion began to yet again play his harmonica to a catchy tune. “Do you know it?” she asked and he sighed, slowly bringing the harmonica away from his lips.

“No. No I do not. Only warriors of legendary ability could ever hope to achieve such a move...” the stallion trailed off and began to play his harmonica yet again, memorizing Echo with his soft tunes...

* * *

Echo jolted awake, the harmonica tune still playing as she frantically looked from side to side. Evan stopped and looked back to her, brow risen as his harmonica rested in his hands. “Sorry, I uhh... heh-heh...” the man chuckled nervously.

“What... what are you doing?” Echo panted, her breathing a little shakey.

“Oh uhh... nothing, it's nothing. I uhm... my great grandmother used to play one for me... she taught me a little too... but uhh... when she passed away I sorta... kinda stopped playing,” he mentioned timidly, a touch of sadness in his voice.

Echo exhaled deeply, her dream of a memory soon fading as she once again relaxed. She looked to the man as he slowly slide the harmonica into a case. “Keep playing it,” she whispered softly, making the man look to her with a somewhat surprised look. “I like it. Please, keep playing it,” she whispered. The man shrugged, chuckling a little.

“Well... okay, but I'll warn you. I'm not very good, and most of it is pretty sad,” he warned lightly before bringing the harmonica back to his lips and beginning to play again. Echo laid her head into her forelegs as she rest across the backseat, letting the harmonica's tunes sooth her nerves, making it seem as if everything else was non-existent.

Echo felt her eyes grow heavy. Keeping them open became a chore more than anything. In the end she just let her eyes flutter shut however she never truly fell asleep, more just a state of motionless conscious.

Before she could tell what was happening, the music stopped and the door to the car opened. Her head perked up immediately and she watched as the man got out. “Wh-where are you going?” she stammered and he briefly peeked back into the car.

“To start a fire and cook some food. I'm hungry and it's cold out,” he mentioned and she blinked in curiosity before he stomach grumbled, making her wonder how long it had been since she had properly eaten.

Just as she sat up, a chill went down her body. Looking outside, she realized the only true source of illumination was the cab light in the car, only on due to the door being open. “Gah jeeze! It's freezing!” she mentioned, taking note that it was colder now due to the sun having set, yet even still there was no snow on the ground.

A voice chuckled from behind the car as the man rummaged through the trunk. “Yeah, that's why I'm gonna light a fire,” he commented with a chuckle as he pulled out some packets of noodles and a bag of fruits.

Echo shuddered and shivered as she left the vehicle and followed the man over to a clearing nearby. The man gathered together some kindling and pulled out a shiny Zippo flint lighter. On the face of the lighter were engravings, those of a wolf with the moon in the background.

His lighter sparked and a flame came to life. Lighting the kindling aflame, the man carefully brought the fire to life. Echo took a closer look at the interesting lighter. It was far different than anything she had ever seen, like much of the man's technology he possessed. “That's a cool looking lighter,” she mentioned and the man nodded.

“Yeah I... my step dad gave it to me,” he commented as Echo sat across from him, the fire between the duo slowly building.

“Step dad?” she asked and Evan nodded.

“Yeah he... he always thought I was the greatest. Said he knew I was going to go far in life, knew I was gonna become something...” he trailed off, a tear trickling down his face.

“But?” she asked, the question lingering before the man answered.

“Well... I ended up here, in Equestria... so much for being great,” he commented, putting himself down.

“Well there's nothing wrong with that. You've done great things. Heck, you're 'The Punisher!' The one who punishes evil!” she mentioned and the man just shrugged.

“But sometimes...” he looked to the moon, thinking about the mother he so yearned for. “I wish I could've been everything she wanted me to be.” Echo looked to the man, the fire crackling between them, half his body illuminate and the other half dark as night. He just sighed, wiping the tears from his face as he set up a pot of water over the fire and let it boil before adding the instant noodles.

“Well... I think you're pretty awesome,” Echo commented and he just shrugged it off, handing her a bowl with some chopsticks. “Chopsticks?” she asked, struggling to get a hold of them in her hoof before quickly resorting to magic.

“Yeah. Old Chinese, errm... I think here it's Gryphon, or Zebra tradition... not sure.” The man stirred the pot of noodles for just a few moments before adding some dried vegetables to the mix. He motioned for her bowl to which she levitated over to him. He poured her a generous amount before pouring the other half into his own bowl.

Setting the pot aside, the duo began to chow down on the instant noodles. Echo struggled profusely with the chopsticks, grumbling as she brought her lips down to the ridge of the bowl, tilting it so she could just pour the noodles into her mouth.

Stopping for a moment, she looked to the man and nearly gasped. He was in a calm state, legs crossed with the bowl sitting on the ground just in front of him. He would ever so gently, carefully and fluidly, reach down with the chopsticks and take a small amount of the noodles and feed them to himself, never once failing to do so.

Echo watched in absolute fascination before a wet nose pressed against her neck, making her yelp and jump back, nearly spilling her noodles. “Gah! What the hay!” she screamed, though even so it never even fazed the man's concentration.

The deer looked to her then stepped forwards, nosing at her bowl of noodles. Her own stomach grumbled and she pulled the bowl away, swatting her hoof at the wild deer and trying to shoo it away.

“Go on, shoo, get outta here, go!” she ordered the animal.

“She's hungry,” the man across from her mentioned.

“Yeah, well so am I. This thing can find it's own damn food!” she snapped. Looking to the man, she gasped as she saw him feeding some noodles to a much younger looking deer.

“Don't give them too much. Deer aren't supposed to have large supplements of grain in their diets. Noodles will sit heavy in their stomachs. But...” he casually reached into a bag and pulled out some sliced apples. The doe deer that was recently pestering Echo trotted over to Evan as he fed the adolescent fawn some sliced apple. “They like apples.”

The doe reached over his shoulder, nibbling at him just before he fed her some of the apple slices.

“Wha... I've... I've never seen deer like this!” Echo gasped and Evan just chuckled lightly.

“Of course not. Why would they come to you if you just shoo them away heartlessly?” he asked.

“Wh-what do you mean heartlessly?” she asked curiously.

“You wouldn't even share your food with them, despite having an abundance. In late fall months the trees start shedding their leaves. The grass on the ground dies off and much of the deer's natural food is diminished, meaning they have to look for new food sources. In winter months, the temperatures drop and they need food to sustain minimal dietary needs...” the man chuckled as the fawn nibbled at him.

“I... I had no idea,” Echo whispered in complete shock to the man's unusual caring nature. She had never before in her life met somepony so selfless, so loving and so in touch with not only nature but the world around him. Only once or twice had she ever heard rumors and talk of a mare such as him, but he was no mare.

The man smirked. “Go into the sack there. Fetch out the bag of nuts,” he told her. She blinked before doing as instructed. Holding the bag in front of herself, she arched a brow as she read the label.

“Trail mix?” she asked and he nodded.

“Shake the bag a little, get their attention.” Echo was unsure at first but did as he said, shaking the bag. The doe and fawn's ears perked up and they both looked to her. “Now open it, and take out a hoof-full for each them,” he instructed, Echo doing so.

The fawn mingled over, it's nose twitching cutely as it approached Echo ever so cautiously. In utter fascination, the mare watched as the fawn deer graciously ate the small assortment of nuts and dried berries right out of her hoof, it's textured tongue licking her once it had finished the food.

“You can give him a little more if you want. But...” he trailed off just as the mother doe began to lick at Echo's neck. “Ah-ha-ha... you might wanna give her some too,” the man said as he peeled a banana for himself.

Echo was taken into a world of shock as the two wild deer ate right from her hoof like some kind of domestic pet. After several minutes of feeding the duo, the man spoke up. “Alright, you shouldn't give them too much. It isn't good to feed them an abundance this time of the year,” he told her. Echo sighed, slowly closing the bag of nuts, almost regretfully so.

The man picked up the pot of noodle water, whistling gently. The fawn deer's ears perked up and it mingled back over to the man. The water, no longer hot, was the perfect temperature for the hungry fawn, which quickly began to drink from the pot of noodle water.

“With all the dried vegetables I added to the mix, there is some stray essence of vital nutrients this little guy needs...” the man trailed off as he began to slowly stroke his hand down the fawn's back.

Echo sighed contently as she watched the fawn deer lick the pot clean. After several minutes, the fawn mingled back over towards Echo but went past her just slightly before nestling into its mother, whom was laying down just a few feet past Echo.

“What... I didn't think deer slept in open areas,” she mentioned and Evan nodded.

“They don't... usually. They mostly rest in forests or thick brush, where they feel safest,” he commented. Echo looked back to the deer, watching as they nestled in for the night. “It might just be that it's warm here, or maybe...” Echo's ears flickered as the tune of the man's harmonica began to play again. Even though the tune was sad, it was relaxing in a way. Enough so that Echo laid down, resting her head into her front legs as she let out a yawn.

She was slowly soothed to sleep be the sound of the man's harmonica, leaving him the only conscious one of the group. The man played for a while longer, his tunes traveling out into the emptiness around him...

* * *

Lassie stood on her hindlegs, leaning against the door frame of the sliding glass door that led onto the back deck of the Burdick Manor. She wrapped her front legs around herself, sighing in a depressed way as she looked to the moon, a said violin chorus playing on the radio she had set on the table nearby.

“Does Miss request anything?” asked a blank voice from nearby. Without even looking back, Lassie shook her head.

“Nah Alfred... it's cool. Just...” she trailed off and there was a long pause of silence. “You know, listening to some good ol' music and looking to the moon... I should almost be howling huh?” she joked, but her voice was riddled with depression.

“Well Miss... I do believe only wolves howl to the moon, but if she is to request anything, I am only just down the hallway,” the butler made mention before trotting away. Lassie felt a tear trickle down her cheek, dampening her fur ever so slightly.

Looking back to the moon, she thought back on all her adventures with her master... her owner... “No, he's my... my friend,” she mentioned to no pony in particular. Letting out a sigh, she shook her head. “Where are you now... you old buffoon?”...

* * *

Twilight lay restless in bed, tossing and turning as she tried to force herself to sleep, much like she had done on so many occasions over the past few months. Her pillow was damp... cold from the tears she had shed early that night.

Standing up, she rubbed her eyes and dipped her head down with a depressed and most heartbroken sigh. Looking back up, the first thing she spotted was the little statuette of a crystal pegasus, an angelic halo ring above its head.

The present Evan had given her so long ago. Though she had thought all her tears had been shed, more began to dribble out from the corners of her eyes. She clenched her eyes shut, standing and trotting over to the window, looking to the moon. “Why... why did you...” she trailed off, figuring it pointless to ask...

* * *

Evan stopped playing his harmonica and looked to the fire. A gust of wind blew past, huffing up a fume of smoke that blustered into the clearing, bright embers gliding through air as the smoke seemed to take form.

Evan watched in heart wrenching depression as the smoke played out memories of him and Twilight together, along with Spike and Lassie... back in the good times. Even when Lassie was a puppy... when he was a good man.

He flopped back, looking to the moon as a lone tear trickled out of his only good eye. “What have I become?...”

Author's Note

The man stood before the sink, washing the blood from his face. Resting his hands on both sides of the sink, he breathed heavily, water dripping from his exhausted facial features. He looked up and gasped from his reflection in the mirror.

A blood soaked man looked back to him, a demonic horn growing out from one side of his head, his damaged eye glowing hellish red and blood dripping down his face. His clothes were torn and shredded apart, filled with dozens of bullet holes and the wounds to match. "How can you say you vanquish evil, when you yourself walk this world... a demon?" the reflection asked.

The man's grip around the sink tightened before he lost control and punched the mirror, shattering the reflection. Blood dripped down from his knuckles and splattered in the porcelain sink. He slowly withdrew his hand before speaking. "I am evil, and once I'm done... I'll end it."

Another presence entered the room. "Burdy, come on, we gotta go," the other man said. Burdy looked down to the sink, to all the blood soaked shards of glass, briefly seeing his hellish reflection. Ever so slowly, a smirk tugged at the corner of his lips...

Chapter 66

'The fallen hero...'

Echo shivered, her leg kicking slightly as she quickly awoke. She could see her breath, fumes of vapor leaving her mouth in plumes. She shuddered and tried to warm herself, crossing her forelegs and rubbing herself to try and keep warm.

She took notice that the fire was a mere smoldering pile of ash now, and that the deer from the night before were nowhere to be seen. She craned her neck, a little stiff due to the awkward way she had slept the night before.

She heard the ruffling of a bag just before audible crunching. Looking to the origin, she spotted Derreck, dressed in his black duster that draped over his tight fiber weave uniform. She took a closer look and saw he was eating some potato chips of sorts.

She stood up and staggered slightly, still very stiff from sleeping on the cold ground, and the frigid temperatures didn't help in the slightest. “Celestia... it's cold,” Echo shuddered out her complaint but Derreck just shrugged.

She walked up beside him, looking to his heavily scarred face that made her wonder how exactly he got such grievous injuries. His bad eye was also covered for the time being. Aside from eating the occasional chip, he hardly moved. “What are you doing?” Echo asked, the man's answer being blunt and to the point.

“Watching,” he stated. She blinked and followed his stare, but only saw the emptiness of the barren meadows. She leaned forwards and squinted her eyes, figuring perhaps he was watching something in the far out distance.

“Watching what?” she asked.

“For enemies, assassins, hitponies. You said yourself, and I saw for myself, that pony we're after sent ponies after you, and if they're smart, they'll hit while we're sleeping. So I stayed up to keep watch,” Derreck replied. Echo looked around, a shiver going down her back at how easily she had let her guard down. Before long, she thought about something else.

“Where's Evan?” she asked, noticing the second man was no longer present.

“He's around, somewhere. Doesn't matter, we gotta move. He'll catch up with us later,” Derreck replied just as a gust of harsh wind blustered past, Echo's body shivering involuntarily.

“Sweet Celestia... aren't you cold?” Echo gasped, seeing the man stand so calmly. He shook his head.

“Nah. This suit is made of a fantastic weave of fabrics and fiber than fit tightly to my body, though not in a restricting way. It insulates body heat and regulates my temperature to the perfect levels, keeping me comfortable on the battlefield and letting me focus on more pressing issues rather than be bothered by climate temperatures. The fabric weave is also woven together in a way that it can keep pressure on wounds, reducing blood loss from injuries and also keeping pressure on injuries such as broken bones.” Derreck turned to her and pulled aside the flaps of his duster coat, revealing the torso of the suit.

“There's also a special blend of quality fabric that is resistant to kinetic force, such as being stabbed by a knife or shot with an arrow. It doesn't however, protect me from slashing wounds or magical attacks... tough luck,” he informed her. She blinked, baffled in amazement by the suit he wore, having never seen or even heard of such a fantastic creation.

“Where... how... who gave this to you? It must have cost a pretty bit,” she mentioned but Derreck just chuckled.

“Nah... it didn't cost me much, just an afternoon...”

* * *

Several weeks earlier...

There was a knock at the door, casual and not very hasty. “Just one moment darling,” came the mare's eccentric voice. The white mare finished sewing together the seam of her dress before fluffing her mane to the side and making for the door.

“Coming darling, coming,” Rarity called out. Swinging open the door, her wonderful smile turned to a shocked expression as she was astounded by the sight of the scarred man before her. “Ev... Evan,” she gasped, quickly taking a look out the door. “Y-you shouldn't be here,” she whispered, as though it was a great secret.

“Why not?” Derreck asked as he slipped through the doorway. “It says 'Come in, we're open',” he mentioned. Rarity bit her lip as she hesitantly closed the door behind herself, flipping the sign so that it read 'Sorry, We're closed'.

“What... what are you doing here?” Rarity asked in a hushed tone. “If Twilight or the others were to... I should throw you out after what you did to Twi,” she mentioned but Derreck just shrugged.

“But you won't, and besides... nopony knows I'm in town. I snuck here without anypony the wiser,” he mentioned.

“H-how?” she asked back and Derreck pointed out the window, to which Rarity took a brief look, only see a cardboard box. “I don't understand. How'd you get here without anypony seeing you?” she asked but Derreck just shrugged off the question, getting to the task at hand.

He tossed a rather hefty bag of bits onto the table. “I need you to make me something... a uniform. Celestia... needs me to help her with a certain criminal situation and to do that I need a uniform... and she said you were the best dress maker in Equestria... ever. Her words,” he stated, a blush coming across her cheeks.

“Well... that might be exaggerating it slightly-” she began, forgetting about the situation between the man and her best friend.

“Well I agree with her. So what do you say?” he asked, tossing a note on top of the bits regarding all the special needs the suit required.

“Well I... I suppose I should-” she cut herself off as, from the corner of her eye, she spotted Pinkie Pie trotting along outside. In great haste, the white mare quickly and most frantically pulled down the drapes over all the windows with her magic.

“Shoo, go on, you can't be here. After what you did to Twilight I should be ashamed of myself for even considering to help you,” she snapped, feeling a sense of self guilt.

“Hey, relax. Nopony is gonna figure out unless you tell them. All I need is a yes or no answer. Will you build me this suit or not? After that, I'll leave... if you want me too,” he stated in a most perverse voice.

“Of course I would... I mean... no!...” she trailed off and looked to the bag of bits. Opening it up, she took note that every single bit was a Celestia bit, worth one thousand regular ones...

“Over twenty large... and I'll throw in whatever extra cash you might need, or whatever else you want. Anything... you could ever desire,” he mentioned.

“I... yes. I'll make your suit. Just go on,” she said in haste, starting to get a little flustered.

“Well then... in that case...” Derreck stood up, removing his shirt.

“Wh-what are you doing. Go on, get out of here,” she told him, getting a little flustered as she dared a peak at his masculine form. His body was so rigid and stern. His body looked smooth but firm with definition. His muscles looked to be expertly chiseled from stone.

She staggered back, her legs shaking and threatening to give out from underneath her as the man spoke. “Don't you need to measure me? Figure out how big I am?” he asked, hinting to a lewd innuendo.

“I... no! No, I already measured you once. I don't... I have you size written down already...” she said, heat traveling to her loins as the man stepped forwards, a thick musk hitting her like a fright train.

“I'm... a little different than you remember, both in body and mind...” he trailed off, stopping as he was just a few feet away from her. “Oh yes... I remember how you'd throw all those advances at Evan, so obvious yet so futile,” the man stated, Rarity blushing a deep hue of red as she recalled all those fantasies she'd had of the man, how she used to lust over him in the past.

“You know... I held Evan's leash, kept him in line. I only let him see what I wanted him to see. Hear what I wanted him to hear. I kept him naive, dense and innocent as I saw fit... it was humorous to me you know, watching you and Twilight nearly fall over your front hooves trying to get his attention, only to fall over in front of him from his dumbfoundedness,” Derreck mused to himself, reminiscing in all the memories he'd had of keeping Evan straight as an arrow, completely unaffected by the most basic desires and completely unresponsive towards sexual advances.

Derreck let out a grunt as he stretched out, posing his massive muscular form before her. “So... speaking of which... do you have anything else you want besides money? Maybe a bonus? Anything at all?” he asked, Rarity biting her lip as she tried to back up, but found herself against the wall.

“W-well... I-I-I su-suppose there's one or... something...” she trailed off, her eyes wandering across the man's body but quickly snapping out of her desires. The man stepped forwards, closing the distance between them. Just before she lost herself, Rarity hopped to her hindlegs, leaning up against the wall and pushing the man back with feeble strength.

“No. I shouldn't, for Twilight's sake. You should go. I'll build the damn suit!” she yelled out, battling with her inner urges. The man leaned close, his masculine musk hitting her hard.

“Then 'tell' me to leave,” he whispered in her ear, her body shuddering. It was the last straw, she could take it no longer. She looked up into his good eye, the second covered by the patch. Her lips parted slightly, feeling his heavy breath upon her cheeks.

She went to resist, to tell him to leave, but it got lost in the back of her mind that was now clouded with arousal. “Tell me what you want,” Derreck whispered. “Tell me what to do,” his voice was cool and steely.

Slowly, their lips connected. It was like a fiery eruption to Rarity, all that built up tension, finally released. It was mind blowing. She pulled back from the kiss with a gasp, a string of saliva still connecting their lips. It felt so wrong but... so right. Every inhibition she had, every sense of guilt over it, was completely thrown out the window.

The man held her by the hips, holding her close to his much larger body. She could feel the bulge in his pants. It was like everything from her wildest fantasies. With her magic, she dimmed out the lights and the man slowly led them over to the couch, laying her flat on her back while her magic went to work on his belt.

Their lips pressed together once more, tongues dancing together in fiery passion as his pants were unzipped. He didn't bother taking them off and simply pulled out his cock, bringing it to bear. Rarity forced her tongue down his throat, moans of lust dampened by their connected lips. Pulling away from the kiss, Rarity let out a gasp as she looked south.

The white mare bit her lip as she looked down at his package, her lower lips quivering in anticipation. The big man held her down, hiking her rear end closer to his groin. Pressing his tip to her entrance, he began to rub her slit, lubricating his thick shaft with her juices.

Moans began to leave Rarity's mouth as she was deprived her desires for the time being, the teasing alone nearly enough to topple her over the edge. “Please...” Rarity whispered, the man perking a brow.

“What?” he asked, prodding her a little with the tip and making her squeal, her inner most muscles clenching tightly.

“Please, rut me. Make me you mare. Claim me,” she whined like a slutty mare in heat. The man smiled, she was his, completely and utterly dominated.

With a powerful thrust he hammered himself into her waiting snatch, spreading her wide and hilting himself with one precise thrust, emitting a yelp from the mare as her legs instinctively wrapped around his hips and held him tight.

The man jerked his hips, sliding back and forth inside of her tight little cunny, holding her tight at the hips and not letting her move much. A huff of hot breath left his mouth as he relished in the feel of his thick member encased by her nethers, fit snuggly inside. 'It fits like a glove,' he thought to himself.

Rarity whined out in ecstasy, moaning lewdly but her moans being drowned out by the sloppy noise of their sex. Feeling the all too familiar build up of orgasm rising in her lower region, she cried out to the man.

“Oh sweet Celestia... Burdy I'm... I can feel it...” she let out a wail as her one front hoof rose to her forehead as though in panic. Her inner muscles clenched tightly, grasping his intruding member and trying to milk him.

The man ground himself into her hips while she bit down on his shoulder, riding out the orgasm she had longed for over the past few months-

* * *

“Okay, enough... I... ugh, I don't need to know about you having sex,” Echo said, shuddering slightly as she envisioned it happening.

“Well you asked,” Derreck responded rather bluntly.

“I asked how you got the suit,” she replied back.

“And I answered that question,” Derreck told her honestly.

Echo just held up a hoof. “You could've just said you... nevermind, can we just go. We're wasting time here,” she ordered and Derreck merely laughed.

“Okay, if you insist,” Derreck laughed, chuckling to himself. Echo shivered, wondering what it'd feel like to be held down by the man like that... claimed by-

She quickly forced the thoughts from her head, wondering why in all Equestria she'd even envision herself like that... beneath his massive body, held down and completely under his control. His big hands holding her front hooves against the bed as he lay atop of her, claiming her-

She forced the perverse thoughts from her head, making sure they stayed dead. The duo hopped into the classic muscle car, Derreck quickly keying the ignition.

Not even a moment after Echo had shut her door, the big man hammered the accelerator to the floor, moving fast on the manual transmission.

The engine roared as black smut fumed out the side exhaust pipes. The tires spun, spitting up dirt before quickly grabbing traction. The front end was hiked up, the front tires a few feet off the ground.

Echo was held back in her seat from the raw power of the vehicle, hastily grabbing the dash and trying to hold herself against the seat as the man sped off like a madman. “Sweet Celestia! ARE YOU INSANE?!” Echo gasped just as the front end came crashing back to the ground, the man fast on the transmission shift.

“Of course... it's why you hired me, right?” he asked back rhetorically.

“Yeah, well I didn't think you'd try to get use killed in the process,” she snapped, her heart thumping wildly. He just laughed, shifting one final time as they reached a high cruising speed. “Geeze... can you just let up every now and then? Live life at a slower pace?” she asked but the man shook his head.

“See, now you sound like Evan. If you always live life high octane, pedal to the floor, nopony will ever be able to catch you, hold you down. You'll only stop once you hit a wall and go out in a blaze of glory,” he stated, the mare huffing.

“Just don't take me with you, okay?” she responded, leaning her chin on the window space of the door as she began to relax.

“So?” Derreck asked. Echo turned and looked to the man whom wasn't directly looking back.

“So what?” she asked back.

“Were you close?” he asked and she cocked her head back, thrown off by the question.

“What kind of question is that? Close to what?” she snapped at him and he just shrugged.

"Close to him? The stallion you've hired me to kill," Derreck made mention.

"Why do you want to know?" she inquired and the big man shrugged calmly, not really seeming to be bothered if she answered or not.

“Just a question. I hardly feel that some random pony scientist would become this fixated over stopping another random pony in her field of knowledge just because... figured there's more to it than that," the man replied.

“No! We were not close. I already told you, I was helping him with the project so I feel obligated to stop him before it's too late,” she scoffed and Derreck just sighed.

“Whatever you say.” The man continued to drive in silence but before long slipped a disk into the radio, humming along to the tune and tapping his hands against the steering wheel to the beat.

“What are you doing?” Echo asked, in slight annoyment that the man wasn't staying serious like she figured he would.

“Bad Company... till the day I die... mmm, till the day I die..,” he hummed to her and she just rolled her eyes, tossing her hooves in the air.

“I chose a gun, and threw away the sun!” Derreck sung to her. As he continued to sing, she huffed.

“Did anypony ever tell you to give up your dreams as a singer?” she said in a snippy tone. He shook his head then shrugged.

“Nope, guess you're my first,” he chuckled, continuing to sing along to the song. “Hey-hey-hey... BAD company, and I can't deny...”

She rolled her eyes but even so, eventually found her hoof tapping to beat. “I can't believe this... here we are, on the verge of the apocalypse and you're... jamming out to some music I've never even heard before,” she muttered and Derreck chuckled.

“Eeyup. Sounds about right. This is the classics man, gotta love 'em,” he told her. She rolled her eyes again and laid down, the heat from the vents finally making the temperature comfortable. Exhaustion from sleeping in the cold started to come over her and soon enough she was letting out more than a few yawns.

Looking up and through the window, she watched as the tops of the trees passed by, one after the other. As they passed, so did the time, and with it her eyes slowly fluttered shut...

* * *

Echo stumbled along, a pony behind her guiding her way. “Come on, it's just this way,” said the voice behind her that she loved so much. The blindfold over her eyes made traversing a nightmare but she trusted the stallion to guide her.

“Wait, hold on,” Echo giggled as she tried to feel ahead of herself before continuing.

“I got you. Don't you trust me?” asked the stallion's voice. She giggled again, a blush coming across her cheeks.

“Of course, always,” she smiled just before his lips planted a kiss against her cheek.

“Okay, then don't worry about anything... I've got a surprise for you, just remember... I always think everything through,” he stated. She heard a mechanical door whoosh open and could tell they just walked into a dark room.

The door shut again and with it, she could almost feel the lights come on. The stallion pulled the blindfold from her face...

* * *

Echo jolted awake with a gasp as she felt the car come to a hault. “Where, what?!” she gasped in panic, sitting straight up.

“Don't worry, nothing to be alarmed about. Just stopping for a beer,” Derreck commented, Echo looking to the light pannels across the face of the building before them. It was a tavern of sorts with the sign reading 'Bethy's Bar' in illuminated letters.

“Derreck! We have-” she was cut off as he turned off the car and exited. With a huff, she followed him, having nothing else to do. Walking through the bar doors, a whistle echoed the moment the two stepped through the front doors.

A hand waved at them and Derreck nodded, casually making his way over to the table. Echo looked and was shocked to see a similar being to Derreck sitting with two other ponies, one in a wheelchair, and the other a rather large brutish stallion. Lastly there was a ninja clad figure.

She followed Derreck over to the table where he was already shaking hooves with the others. Echo spoke up in an annoyed voice. “Derreck, what are we doing? We don't have time to be socializing,” Echo told him in the sternest voice she could muster, much to the woman's amusement.

“You were right. She is a little prissy thing isn't she?” Kianna laughed. Echo shot the woman an annoyed look. “Oh relax powder puff, it's not what you think. He-Man over here isn't coming for the occasional drink and chat.”

Echo blinked. “Powder puff? He-Man?” she asked and Kianna just sighed with a groan.

“I'm not explaining it. Just take a seat,” she offered before calling out. “Waiter, a round of whiskey!” she shouted.

Echo stood idle, both hesitant and impatient. Derreck just shrugged her off and spoke to the others. “Mind her, she's a little... hasty,” Derreck chuckled, the big one of the woman's group laughing as well. Echo looked to the group, of whom she presumed to be Derreck's friends, with a rather annoyed look on her face. Before she could see what was coming, a hoof tugged on her shoulder, taking her attention to the ninja.

“The name's Senka... nice to meet you Miss...” she trailed off, her hoof extended to greet Echo. She was hesitant at first but figured in the end it couldn't hurt.

“Jewel, Echo Jewel,” she gave a nod as she shook the ninja's hoof.

“Well Ms. Jewel... since you seem so very irritated, let me relieve you. Your... accomplice, shall we say, isn't here just for fun. We're here to provide you with information for your... party, we'll call it,” she stated and Echo blinked.

The big one of the group grunted. “Aww come on Senka, you're supposed to get her all worked up until she's about to blow a blood vessel,” the brute commented with a laugh.

The waitress came by with all the glasses of whiskey, handing them out to the group. Kianna looked to Echo with a smirk. “Well I guess seeing as how Senka of all pon... zebras, greeted you, my name's Kianna,” the woman greeted herself.

“The dumb lug there is Brick. About as smart as a stuttering bull, but as strong as one too,” she mused, the stallion putting on a stupid facial expression as he clapped like an imbecile.

“Durhahaha, strong as bull,” he said in a stupidified voice.

“Yeah... okay, anyway, the cripple here is Dwayne, but don't let his handicap throw you off, he'd still kick your ass,” she commented and the wheelchair bound stallion gave her a wave. “Hey, no funny ideas you,” Kianna snapped, the stallion gasping as he turned to face her.

“But I didn't-” he was cut off as she pressed her lips to his in a fiery display of passion.

Pulling away from the kiss, she gave him a wink. “I didn't say you did, I'm just warning you. Anywho, and the ninja here is Senka. You'd never know but she's blind, yet she can duel the fiercest swordsponies in all Equestria and win... with one hoof tied behind her back,” she mused. “Oh and there used to be one more, Lug Nut... but uhh, as of a few months ago, he's no longer with us, so let's raise a glass to the guy,” Kianna proposed, the entire group along with Derreck rising their whiskey glasses before downing them in one go.

“BLECH, that stuff tastes worse every time. Where's the Vodka?” Derreck coughed. Echo looked to the group.

“Well... if you don't mind me asking,” she began as she took a seat. “What happened to him?” she asked, a little curious.

Kianna pointed to Derreck. “Your buddy there blew him away... and all they ever found were pieces,” she mentioned and Echo felt her stomach sink.

“W-w-wait... so if he was your squad mate and Derreck killed him...” Echo mentioned in rising panic.

“Relax kid, we're not here to fight. We're here to help you,” Kianna assured her.

“But why? Didn't you just say Derreck killed one of your team members?” she asked in confusion.

“That he did, but you know the old saying... today's enemies are tomorrow's allies and vice-versa. War changes with the winds of times. You never know, tomorrow morning I could be hunting you down for this Liquid fellow,” she told the mare who gulped from hearing the last part.

Derreck nudged Echo. “We're assets kid, expendable assets,” he joked in a thick accent.

“It comes with the job," Kianna joked back. "Anyway...” Kianna tossed across a folder. “Sunset Hollows... wonderful place to take the step-family for a vacation when you want them to just... disappear,” she joked as Derreck took the folder and started sifting through the files. “That Liquid guy... once a top mind in the scientist community, later expelled from Hoofington Science Academy for a certain experiment that left three dead and several more injured... exiled himself to this shit-hole... lotta bad asses there,” she mentioned as Derreck sifted through the files.

Kianna shouted out for another round of whiskey while Derreck looked at the files, Echo looking over his shoulder. She thought a moment before looking back to Kianna. “So you don't care at all that Derreck killed your friend?” she asked, much to Kianna's chargin.

“He wasn't my friend and believe me when I say it was complicated. Now, Derreck didn't just kill Lug for the fun of it... he was doing his job. Now Lug on the other hand became shortsighted. We had this deal set up with a crooked cop to frame Evan for a string of murders but the whole deal didn't go through as we planned and Lug worked solo on the op but... it went sour and he was shot dead... now, had Evan begun hunting us down, I would be resentful towards him, but he was just doing his job as much as we were doing ours. Like I said, war changes and with it, our allies. If he was however...” she trailed off and kissed Dwayne on the cheek. “To kill Dwayney here, I'd have to hunt down and slaughter his entire family. Like I said kid, life of a mercenary isn't for the light of heart.”

Echo could barely believe what she was hearing. Derreck interrupted her thoughts with a photo file. “Who's this?” he asked, Dwayne speaking up.

“That is Belle, Liquid's former right-hoof mare,” the stallion informed him. “She was very refined in swordplay but excelled in torture... so I hear,” he stated. Derreck rose a brow.

“Whatever happened to her?” he asked but Dwayne shrugged.

“Dunno. She left Liquid's side and is living on the outskirts these days. Word is they had a dispute over something and it's left their relationship rather rocky... her name apparently means beauty,” he commented, Derreck laughing at the last part as he handed the photo to Echo.

“Who would've guessed?” he asked aloud, Echo cringing at the photo of the hideous mare. She had deep, twisted scars across her face, looking as if somepony had Frankensteined her together. She was also missing her right eye.

Derreck pulled out another file. “And this dweeb? He wears a one piece, spandex leotard? ” he asked, pointing to a picture of a pony dressed in a rainbow colored outfit.

“He calls himself 'The Face of Death'. Nopony knows his real name, where he came from, or even what he looks like under that mask. Started taking hits for Liquid and is extremely good at what he does,” Dwayne stated just as the next round of whiskey hit the table.

“Thanks toots,” Derreck mused while making it seem like he was looking to the file, but secretly examined her every curve as she trotted away. “So... how's this guy any good? Crossbow?” Derreck asked.

“He uhh... he can kinda heal up like you. Heard he was once completely disintegrated but came back from some saliva he left on a chimichanga. Some kinda dark magic keeping his soul alive no matter what... or something like that. Can't be stopped. Word is... he's after you, and not gonna stop until you're both dead,” Dwayne mentioned, Derreck chuckling as he swirled around his glass of whiskey.

“Well... I guess we'll just have to see when we finally meet. Until then, here's to Echo, for bringing us all together like this,” Derreck offered, much to Echo's shock.

“Wha-what, I never... I mean...” she trailed off with a gulp as they all looked to her, glasses risen. “I mean... I guess but-” Senka cut her short.

“Just raise the glass,” she said, her thick Zebrafrican accent made ever noticeable. Echo decided not to say anything and just raised the glass to the toast. Clanging their glasses together, the group pounded back the whiskey and Echo followed suit, gagging afterwards from the burn.

“Blech... what is this? It tastes horrible,” she gasped, much to everypony else's amusement.

“Alcohol, it's not supposed to be overly delicious... not unless your an alcoholic,” Derreck laughed.

The group began to chitchat about old times, catching up on recent events as well. Kianna turned to Echo. “You know, you really picked the right guy for this. One time, as the legend goes, the punks from the Gravelli family decided to... foalnap this mail-pony right. Now she's not Derreck's squeeze or anything like that, she's just a good friend. Doesn't the bastard go and wipe out the entire Gravelli mob family... in one night.”

Echo blinked, looking to Derreck, then to Kianna, wondering if she was serious about that. She didn't know much about mob families or the underground criminal organizations but she figured that a mob family must be a decent size.

Derreck just laughed. “Yeah... then they hold me to trial about it, but after I prove my innocence Celestia turns around and hires me to take out the other families,” Derreck mused, much to Kianna's join in.

“Yeah. That was a wild two weeks. It's to bad we couldn't go all Rambo on them. Who was that Italian bastard and his group we left alive?” she asked, the conversation starting to puzzle Echo as she got lost in the story.

“Antonio Leone, and the Liotta family. Celestia doesn't know we left him alive but someone has to run things behind the scenes or Manehatten would fall apart,” he finished.

Echo cut in. “Wait, what are you talking about?” Echo asked, wondering what they were going on about.

Derreck turned to her. “Let's just say it's safe to walk Manehatten at night now kid,” he told her, much to her further confusion.

“Why wouldn't it be?” she asked, having never really gotten out to see the sights much. The others in the group all laughed as though it was the funniest thing they had ever heard. “What?” she asked but never got an answer as Derreck looked to Kianna.

“So... Kianna, you our backup?” he asked but the woman just laughed.

“Not a chance in hell. After we leave this bar, you're on you own ol' buddy,” she commented, Derreck rolling his eyes with a smirk.

“Dis gets better by dah minute,” he quipped in a thick Austrian accent before looking out to the crowd. “Now if you'll excuse me, I need to use the powder room,” he told the group before taking off.

“Powder room? Who says that?” Echo mentioned.

Senka spoke up. “He is not going to the washroom for what you think. He is going to relieve himself, but in a much different way. That waitress mare is heavily aroused,” the blind zebra stated.

Echo looked to the waitress as Derreck went up to speak with her. Nothing in her actions betrayed the proposed arousal Senka spoke of.

“What makes you think tha-” she was cut off as Derreck walked to the washroom, the mare following suit soon after in a rather inconspicuous way.

Kianna spoke up to break Echo's thoughts. “Senka's blind but she doesn't let that handicap her. Anything she can pick up with her other senses she does. A bead of sweat from fear, change in tone of your voice from anger, the smell of... well, you know... I guess Derreck picked up on it too. That man is probably the single most dangerous thing in all Equestria. You really hired the right guy,” Kianna mentioned.

“Yeah... if only he'd stop getting sidetracked,” she scoffed, much to Kianna's amusement.

“Well I'll tell you something kid. I'm not nearly on the same level as Derreck... at least in terms of smell, but you seriously need to have a shower if you're thinking about heading into Sunny Hollows. You stink,” she mentioned, Echo quickly sniffing herself.

“No I don't, I just put on perfum-” Kianna butted in before she could finish.

“Exactly. You smell like fancy, high-class, hoity-toity-ness. You go into a place like Sunset Hollows, the locals will sniff you out like hounds... then they'll rape you... or rape you then kill you... or kill you then rape you,” she mentioned, Echo shuddering. “So do Derreck a favor and make his job easier. Take a shower and don't put anymore perfume on... in fact, after you take a shower, don't bathe again until it's over. Maybe roll around in the trash a bit.”

Echo blinked as the group took another round of drinks before going to leave. “And uhh... whatever you do, don't ever stab him in the back or give him reason to mistrust you or he'll...” she trailed off and never finished.

“How do I know we can trust you? What if this is a setup?” Echo asked back. Kianna smirked.

“Because I don't do jobs for rapists like Liquid. Stallions like that make my stomach twist,” she replied before making her leave, leaving Echo by herself. She looked around, a shiver going down her back as she realized that any pony in this bar could be a possible assassin sent by Liquid.

Taking Kianna's advice, she decided on a shower then wondered where one could be found. Flagging down a waitress she asked her mind. “Out the front door and head left down the street some. It's a little dirty there but there's public showers hun,” the waitress informed her to which she nodded and made her leave.

Heading out the front doors, Echo shivered from the cool wind before looking both ways and once more into the bar to make sure nopony was following before heading to the public showers. It was a small brick building with two doors, one for stallions and one for mares.

Echo headed into the mare's section and quickly discarded the cloak and her belt containing her knife and bit pouch. Heading into one of the stalls, she flipped on the shower nozzle but jolted in shock, leaping back as the shower spat out icy water. Soon enough it quickly turned to a more favorable temperature once the water ran for a few moments.

She stepped into the stream, exhaling in relief. It had been a few days since she had taken a good shower, let alone washed herself. Feeling the water stream down her fur, washing away all the dirt and grime...

She began to scrub herself down, washing her mane and using the soap bar as much she could-

“Mind saucing over that soap when you're done?” asked a thick voice, much to her shock.

“GWAHH! DERRECK!” She screamed in fright. She covered herself with her hooves as the man peeked around the corner with his hand held out.

“What?” he asked blankly.

“What do you mean 'What'? You know full well what! This is the mare's room!” she shouted and Derreck just shrugged.

“Yeah, so? The stallion's room is dirty. There's condoms all over the floor, scribbling all over the walls, gloryholes... kinda gross. It's way nicer in here but you got the only good bar of soap...” he trailed off. She scoffed, rolling her eyes and going to hand over the soap but at the last moment it slipped from her hoof, skidding across the shower floor.

“Got it,” Derreck called out, chasing after the soap bar. Echo quickly slapped her hoof over her face, shielding her eyes from the sight of the nude man chasing the bar of soap across the floor. The big man went to pick it up but the bar slipped from his grasp, shooting back towards Echo whom was unaware of the event.

He went to chase after it again but slipped on the slick tile floor and came crashing down with an audible 'THUMP!' and a groan.

Echo jolted from the sound and dared a look. “Guh! Why are you... put some clothes on already!” she shouted, the man's naked body laying before her.

“Why? It's a shower,” he commented back before reaching towards her.

“Hey whatta you think you're...” she trailed off as he grabbed the soap that rested between her front hooves.

“Gotcha! Little bastard... I'm not dropping you this time,” he mused to himself before heading off to the other stall. Echo grunted to herself, flustered by the man's actions. He was such a bumbling oaf.

“He's such a wank...” she muttered to herself as she began to wash herself once more. Most of the time Derreck was straight to the point, but other times he was so childish, outlandish... then there was Evan.

He was gentle, caring, loving... how he could walk side by side with Derreck was beyond her but at least she wouldn't have to do it for long. She nodded to herself with contentment. After the mission she'd just pay him and leave, and that would be that. She had no interest in being his friend. To her, he was just a mercenary, a hired gun...

'But he is lovable...' she thought to herself, her mind wandering. He was knowledgeable, both in darker ways of life and the better, more loving ways. He could be tough as nails, unbreakable... or he could be as gentle as a butterfly. A rock solid fighter, or a caring nature going peace walker... his absurd personality changes tangled her mind up in a mess.

He seemed to be everything a pony needed him to be at that exact moment... most of the time anyway. She blushed to herself. 'The perfect guy,' she thought, a little bashful about her thoughts of him.

Truth be told, over the past few days she had grown a little fond of the man, Evan anyways. Derreck... only a little. He wasn't so much a hired gun as he was a tutor, a mentor of sorts. He didn't just take it as another hit, he stayed by her side, ensured her safety...

She recalled when Evan had used his duster coat to keep her warm on that frigid night, such a selfless act and asked nothing in return. A faint smile crested on her lips as she recalled the deer from the night before.

Her thoughts were broken as the man in the stall next to her began to whistle and hum to a tune, making Echo groan aloud, enough so that she knew Derreck could hear her. “Do you really have to do that now? It was so peaceful and perfect,” she commented and Derreck just laughed.

“I can hear them say... BAD COMPANY... and I won't deny...” Echo just buried her face into her hoof.

A short time passed before Derreck stepped out of the shower, drying himself with a towel. “I have a second one if you want.” He offered a dry towel to the mare, Echo looking to him, before quickly looking away again as the man was still essentially nude.

“Ugh... yeah, just get some clothes on already,” she told him. Derreck stifled a chuckle as he dried himself off before starting to slip into his black suit. Interest perked the mare as she looked to the suit and watched him slip it on. It seemed to fit him in a comfortably snug way, which also sported his perfect curves for all to see.

His body was immaculate, the definition of perfection. Not overly bulky but large enough to invoke fear into his enemies. The only thing off from his body's seeming perfection was his battered face. It was scarred. The ones that ran up and down his face weren't too deep but where fairly noticeable, even from a distance. The one on his cheek however was brutal. It ran deep and the scar tissue was tucked in, unlike the others.

“See something you like?” Derreck asked, breaking Echo's train of thought and making her jump.

“GWAH! What?! No the... uhh... thing,” she stated and Derreck rose a brow, having caught her stare. She quickly cobbled together some words and put together a sentence. “Liquid. We have to stop Liquid now!”

Derreck just laughed and motioned to the door. “Well in that case... shall we proceed?” he laughed, the duo exiting the public shower and heading for the car, Echo rather flustered. Echo stepped into the passenger seat and watched as Derreck slowly walked around the front of the vehicle, stroking his hand along the fenders and the hood.

There was a smile on his face as he walked along, admiring the car. Sitting into the passenger seat, he smiled. “You know... I always wanted one of these cars when I was younger, but with a 460 Interceptor in it. But...” he trailed off and keyed the ignition, the diesel engine rumbling to life. “A diesel engine sounds pretty cool too.”

He pinned the accelerator and raced out of the small town, a rooster tail of dust kicked up behind them as they reached speeds exceeding 100mp/h. Echo began to examine the cars features, watching how the man drove it.

Everything began to slowly piece itself together as she watched him. She then took notice of the little belts beside each seat. “What are these things? Some kinda secret weapon?” she asked, only to Derreck's cackling amusement.

“Hahahaha... no, no not really... they're seatbelts... you put it across your chest and buckle yourself in...” he trailed off and pointed to the buckle piece. “There... it keeps you restrained in case of a crash. It's a safety thing,” he mentioned.

Echo gasped. “Geeze, why didn't you tell me earlier, what with how you drive,” she commented, strapping the belt across her chest. Derreck just laughed.

“Yah, whatever you say,” he joked. Echo watched as trees sped by, or rather, as they sped by the trees.

“You know... you should probably wear yours,” she mentioned and he pointed to her.

“Now listen kid, I don't need advice on life-” he was cut off as the wheels all burst and the car began to spin out of control before promptly flipping, rolling over several times and finally ejecting the big man.

The car eventually lost momentum and came to a grinding stop, Derreck's body sliding a few feet past it. Echo groaned as she sat there, thankful the car landed upright. As she got her bearings together, she watched in shock and horror as Derreck stood up, his forehead gashed open but slowly sealing shut.

“Hey kid... you okay?” he asked, worry in his voice.

“What the hell are you trying to do?! Kill us?!” Echo shouted before trying to frantically get her seat belt undone. As much as she tried, she found that the latch holding her buckle in was warped and mangled. She swore silently as she jerked the buckle, trying to get it undone.

Derreck slowly walked forwards, examining the tires and spotting several spiked caltrops jutting out of the rubber...

Disregarding it for the time being, he walked over to Echo's aid. “Heh... looks like you were the smart one for buckling up,” he joked.

She smacked him hard in the shoulder. “Just what did you think you're doing? We could've been killed!” she snapped and he sighed.

“I don't... it wasn't... somepony set up a trap on the road. They knew we were coming this wa-” he trailed off, stepping back from her with a sniff of the air, a strange look on his face.

“What? What's wrong?!” she asked frantically as she struggled with the seatbelt.

“Nothing... just... sssh...” Derreck hushed her, his nostrils twitching. In a blaze of motion he spun around and clapped his hands together. Just a fraction of a second later, a sizzling electric buzz echoed out and the transparent camouflage covering the sword and it's wielder slowly fizzled away.

“You wear to much cologne bud!” Derreck snarled as he held the blade of the assassin's sword between his palms. The pony struggled to regain control of the sword but Derreck merely took a step forwards, forcing the pony back.

The big man inhaled deeply, his whole body tensing up before he exhaled, putting mass force onto the blade. The entire sword, handle, blade and all, shattered into tiny shards with the cloaked pony staggering back in shock.

“Woah... this aughta be fun!” he retorted in a childish manner.

“Yeah, once I've snapped your neck!” Derreck snarled. The pony just laughed, his facial features hidden behind a barbaric helmet.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever you say old timer. Got lots more where that came from,” the stallion rushed forwards, pulling a second sword from it's sheath and leaping wildly at the big man and swinging with precision.

However, despite his accurate blade work, Derreck moved like lightning, his body tilting side to side and leaning back, dodging every single strike the stallion could swing. Swinging high, the stallion put all his might behind a gruesome strike.

Derreck stood motionless and at the very last possible moment stuck his index finger out. His finger stopped the blade, the blade itself getting lodged into his fingernail but not cutting to deep. A droplet of blood dripped down and Derreck looked as it fell.

“Damn... yah drew my blood... guess I'm gonna 'ave tah kill yah now,” he said just before sticking out his left index finger. “Bang!” he shouted, his finger lighting up with a dark blue aura that blasted a magical shot right through the pony's chest.

The stallion gasped, a spew of blood leaving his mouth but only just before Derreck snapped the assassin's neck with quick and utter performance. The body fell before the big man, crumpled in a lifeless heap. “The Face of Death huh?” Derreck laughed, spitting on the corpse's helmet before making his way over to Echo who still fidgeted with the seat belt.

“Maybe now you see why I hate these things,” Derreck mused as he reached down to cut her loose.

“DERRECK!” Echo screamed just as a knife stabbed into the side of the big man's neck.

“GWAUGH!” Derreck boomed, slamming back an elbow into his attacker's head and knocking him several feet back with brutal force. Whirling around and yanking the knife from his neck, he snarled as he watched The Face of Death stand up, shaking off the disorientation of being struck so hard.

“Oh hey, this'll be fun. Just so you know, some witch encased my soul with some kinda crazy dark magic stuff... said it was my curse or something. To be forever immortal... I mean, seriously, how's that a curse?” he laughed manically. “You know, just thought you should know, in case... you know, you're all down in the dumps in disappointment when you, you know, can't kill me,” he laughed.

Derreck clenched his fists, his Shadow Steel blades sliding out from between his knuckles. “Oooh, shiney. I'll definitely enjoy this!” the stallion amused himself before charging forwards with a twin set of knives.

With a wild set of swings he began his assault but couldn't match the blinding speed of the big man, who quickly twisted the stallion's forelegs and stabbed both knives through his throat before hammering his bladed fist into his opponent's face.

The stallion staggered back, pulling the knives in his throat free and the wounds slowly sealing up. “Awe man, that really hurt. Do you have to be so mean?” the stallion asked in a whimpering tone. “Bwahahahaha, who am I kidding?! This is soooo awesome!” he squealed in joy before charging forwards for another assault.

Derreck grumbled angrily. “Goddess! DO YOU EVER SHUT UP?!” The man boomed, charging forwards as well.

The stallion, though still charging forwards, thought to himself before answering. “Nah... not really. I even talk in my sleep,” he giggled.

“SHUT!” Derreck yelled just before beheaded the stallion with his shiny metallic claws. The head rolled away while the body kept moving.

“Wait! Just wait, hold on, time out,” the head spoke while the body made a T with its front hooves. “Hold on... over here... come on, right here... yeah this way. No, no, to the left a little... oh come on, do you know how hard it is to do this?” he asked aloud but only just before Derreck crushed the head under his cowboy boots, driving the crimson into the ground.

“UP!” Derreck finished his statement from before before letting out a relieved sigh.

“GAHHH!” Derreck yelped as a knife was jabbed into his neck. He quickly twirled around, only to be astonished as he saw a little head slowly growing atop the stump of the stallion's neck.

He pulled the blade free and the stallion giggled. “Oh come on dude, can-not-die... remember. Dark magic, witch craft stuff... curse or whatever,” he laughed. Derreck grumbled, clenching his fists so tightly it drew blood.

“I'm gonna shut you up... one way or another,” Derreck snarled as the two clashed together, stabbing at one another but it was only moments before the stallion began rambling again.

“Oh hey, that's some cool fabric weave, it totally stops my knives from stabbing you...” Derreck paid no mind and kept hacking the stallion's body, taking out chunks upon chunks of the stallion.

It was only a few seconds more before The Face of Death began slashing, quickly cutting apart the smooth fabric weave of the battle dress. “Ooooh, found your weakness. Guess this fight is coming to an end sooner than I would've hoped!”

Derreck cocked back his fist and hammered hard, a metallic 'CLINK' echoing as his steely knuckles bashed against the stallion's deathly helmet, knocking him back a few paces.

“No chance,” Derreck mused in an thick Austrian accent before stripping out of the suit.

“Oh, strip dance huh? Make it rain,” the stallion laughed, tossing out bits from literally nowhere. With a furious roar, Derreck charged forwards, topless and wearing nothing more than his boxer briefs.

Leaping like an enraged beast, he slammed down hard on the stallion, tackling him to the ground before impaling him dozens upon dozens of times with his shiny blades.

“Oh, you're not very nice!” the stallion quipped, yanking out a hoof bow and shooting Derreck in the face.

The big man stood up in sudden pain, giving the stallion the opportunity to land a low strike right between Derreck's legs. Then man nearly collapsed, gasping for air as his testicles were brutalized.

“Tell me, do those heal as well?” the stallion giggled in pure laughter. Derreck took a wide stance, quickly pulling the crossbow bolt from his cheek and snarling wildly. “Oh don't give me that look, you love me,” the stallion continued to annoy the big man to no end.

The man's whole body tensed, veins bulging from beneath his skin. His muscles expanded to their maximum size, his claws retracting for the time being. A fiery whirlwind of reddish sparkling dust covered the area around the duo, gusting like a tornado.

The stallion looked around and scratched the back of his head. “Geeze, no need to overreact dude. You weren't the first pony who couldn't kill me. I've been doing this for centuries you know. That's why I am THE Face of Death. You don't get that name just by being a... hey are you even listening?!” the stallion snapped as the man kept roaring, getting louder and louder as the whirlwind picked up power.

The stallion sighed. “It's not a dick dude, don't be so butthurt about it.” Even so the man kept snarling, the red whirlwind of dust now completely surrounding them with no view to the outside world. “Fine, if that's how you really feel I'll kill you quickly,” the stallion sighed, figuring the big man had stopped listening to his annoying rants some time ago. Just before he went to offensive the stallion stopped. Looking to the barrier of the whirlwind, he brushed his hands through the sparkling red dust. Other than the unnatural color, there wasn't much too it.

The stallion charged forwards with blinding speed, figuring he knew he had the man matched. Just before he could leap however, the man appeared directly in front of him. The stallion was taken aback by the shockingly fast speed the man could move at, so fast that even he didn't see the man move.

Grabbing the stallion by the shoulders of his uniform, Derreck jacked him up into the air, the whirlwinds closing in on the duo. “I'm going to burn you to ash... and throw you into the wind!” Derreck growled.

The stallion at first just laughed and cackled but soon felt the hellish whirlwinds start to slowly disintegrate his body, his very fabric of being slowly parting, blowing away into the whirlwind like grains of sand. “WOAH DUDE! Hey, relax! No need to be so serious right?!” the stallion gasped as his body was slowly dissolved into but mere bits of the whirlwind. “Come on man, I didn't mean nothing by it right-” he was cut short as the big man's eye patch was torn off in the winds and that's when he realized it. The big man wasn't falling apart like he was.

He looked into the man's damaged eye, now tainted a deep demonic red and seeming to penetrate deep into his soul. “Oh come on dude, I was just joking!” but it was his last words as his entire body erupted into a fume of dust, being caught into the whirlwind and blown away.

Slowly, the man's body relaxed and with it the whirlwind storm ceased. He stood there, short of breath and chest feeling rather constricted. “Ugh... fuck... you...” he whispered to the finally deceased stallion. Trying to take a deep breath made his condition worsen quicker.

The man staggered over to the car where Echo watched in baffled shock. “Wh-what just... just happened?” she asked and Derreck stumbled over to her side, prying open the door.

“He's... guh... he's fucking... dead...” he gasped, his chest tightening quickly.

“Celestia, Derreck are you alright?!” Echo gasped and the big man nodded.

“Yeah... just need a smoke... or a drink... it's taxes my body pretty hard to do that... but it always wor-” he was cut off as a pair of blades stabbed into his back in rapid succession. The man yelped out in agonizing pain as the stallion, having rematerialized, began to brutally stab the man in the back.

“I-CAN'T-DIE!” The stallion laughed insanely.

A fourth, and final, voice entered the mix. “DERRECK!” Boomed a voice that was usually rather reserved. The other man yanked his friend aside and hit the stallion hard in the chest with the base of his boot, kicking him back a few feet and staggering him.

The man reached to his thigh holster and grabbed hold of the pearlized grips, the holy cross glowing brightly. He drew the gun up high, the shine of the night moon sending a streak of light down the barrel of the gun that ended at the tip of the barrel just as Evan lined up the sights with his target.

The golden letters down the side flashed brilliantly.

'Belladonna'

'And thy lord will set thee free'

In quick and rapid succession Evan tapped on the trigger twice. The massive handcannon erupted a brilliant flash of light out the end of the barrel, the slide rocking back and forth, ejecting smoking brass casings and loading fresh ones. Massive 300g shells hammered the stallion in both sides of his chest with immense force, enough so that he was taken off his hooves and knocked onto his back.

Evan stumbled forwards, clutching at his chest which stung with immerse pain yet he pulled through and staggered up to the stallion that lay in a growing pool of his own blood, coughing up more.

“What a... a waste of... of ammo,” the stallion sneered just as Burdy knelt down beside him.

“Only if you consider yer life a waste,” he quipped in his favorite Arnie accent.

The stallion spat a glob of blood into the man's face. “In a few moments... my wounds will seal shut... and I'm gonna... gonna... ack, kack... what?” he gasped as he began to feel his life slipping away, his lungs completely destroyed, his body losing both blood and fresh oxygen at an alarming rate.

“You said...” Evan huffed. “It was a dark magic curse... attached to your very soul... that forbade you from dying...” he huffed, his chest pains growing. He brought the broadside of the handle to bear. “Does this... mean anything... to you?” he asked, motioning to the symbolic holy cross engraved into the pearl grips.

With sudden realization, the stallion swore at the man. “Fuck you... and fuck your... stupid reli... religion... guhh...” he let out a final huff, unable to properly speak anymore.

Evan held the handcannon tight. “It's my job to send you to him, but it's my lord that will set you free,” Burdy spoke as he pressed the cannon's barrel to the stallion's head and squeezed the trigger one final time, ending the fight.

The man stood up solemnly, staggering a bit before gasping and falling to the ground. Echo watched in horror as the man lay motionless. “Derreck! Evan... whoever the hell you are!” she screamed out, jerking on the belt and swearing to herself as it wouldn't come undone. Looking around, she spotted her utility belt in the backseat, her knife still sheathed.

She reached back and struggled as it was just out of reach. “Oh goddess... come one!” she yelled then nearly smacked herself in stupidity. “What the hay am I doing?!” she asked, the panic having nearly nullified any sensible thoughts.

Calming herself slightly, her horn glowed to life and with it her belt levitated over. She pulled out her knife and cut herself loose, quickly rushing over to Burdy's body. “Come on... come on say something quippy. Say that it's only a flesh wound, do that stupid voice imitation you love so much... COME ON!” she said, slapping his face to try and get the man to wake up.

She leaned her head down and listened to his breathing. He was alive, if barely. “Oh... goddess dammit!” She turned and looked to the town they had come from, now in the far out distance. She tried to heft him up but nearly gasped from the unexpected weight. “Sweet Celestia... whatta you eat? Cement?” she gasped, trying again to lift the man but to no avail.

Her horn lit up and hefted the man into the air but at a serious strain to her magical ability. “MAN... YOU WEIGH A TON!” She yelled out in straining effort just before dropping his body just a few feet away from where she had first lifted him. “There's no way... no way I can lift you all the way there... COME ON! Get up!” she yelled, collapsing over top his nearly motionless body.

Tears began to dribble out of her eyes. “Please... just...” she wept, biting her lip so hard it drew blood. She looked to the far out town, so far away. 'No way... it's too far...' her thoughts trailed off in defeat. Lightly hitting the man with rather feeble strikes, she begged for him to just... stand up, brush himself off... do what he usually did. She rested the side of her head against his chest and continued to weep.

“This is all my fault. I shouldn't have dragged you into this. I should've told the guards... I should've told the police... I should've told somepony... I just wanted to see justice done right... I just wanted to see him dead after he...” she trailed off, her eyes now looking past the man and to the car.

As damaged as it seemed...

She nearly jumped up as she scrambled over to the driver side and sat in the driver seat. “Okay... how'd you do this old man?” she thought back on all the times he started the car. Her one hindleg pressed down on the clutch while her front hoof reached for the keys and tried to turn over the car.

It clicked and chugged a few times but to no avail. “No, no, no, come on start!” she shouted, trying again. The car puttered and spat but still failed to rumble to life. “Come on, just start!” she yelled at the machine.

Keying the ignition again it refused to even crank. “JUST FUCKING START YOU BITCH!” She roared in fading hope. Keying the ignition again the car just clicked. Her heart nearly sank. “No... no! Nononononono! GODDESS DAMMIT NO!” She hit her head against the steering wheel, tears dripping off her face as she screamed out in defeat. 'This can't be it... it just can't be...' she thought in deep sorrow.

“No... please... please just...” she wept. The car pinged a beep several times and she looked up to the instrument panel. On the dash read a little message 'Wait to start' that blinked several times in red. “Wh-what?” she asked, the pinging continuing as the message blinked in deep red. After a few moments the message went away along with the pinging.

She cranked the ignition and the car clunked and chugged but alas rumbled to life, albeit with a racketing ticking emitted from the engine bay. “Oh thank goddess... thankyouthankyouthankyou...” Echo quickly jumped out of the car and used her magic to drag the man over and into the passenger seat.

Blinking, she quickly tied together the cut seat belt across the man's chest, strapping him in. “I'm gonna get you to a hospital... I promise!” she cried, the man not even responding...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

I lay on the cold floor, face down. My chest thumped painfully, feeling tight and constricted. I grunted and groaned, restlessly struggling on the ground. “Are you ready yet?” asked a cold voice that sent shivers down my back.

I managed to roll over to my back and look to the voice's owner. A cloaked pony, surrounded by a dark smog of smoke. “For... what?!” I gasped painfully.

“To face you destiny... what every mortal is destined to face at some point or another,” he stated. I gasped as the pony stepped forwards and as his smog touched my body I began to feel numb.

The pony stepped over top of me, reaching down with his bony hoof. His cloaked hoof came back a little and I saw into his deathly eyes as he reached for me. “Time for it all to end,” Death spoke in a haunting voice.

My eyes were fixed on his as his hoof neared my skin. I felt... nothing... my body began to feel empty and I felt as though my soul itself was being pulled down, out of my body. Like a pair of bony hands were grasping at my soul and dragging me down to the pits of hell. Just as I felt it slipping away, I felt it all come back in a burning, fiery desire.

I let out a deafening roar of power, my eyes glowing with the fury and hatred that burned inside my soul, filling me once more. My hands grabbed his front hooves as I pushed myself upwards, reversing our roles, myself now atop of Death.

I crushed his bony hooves in my immense grip, his bones shattering apart. He gasped in shock looking to me with a petrified look. I grabbed him by the back of his neck, at his spine, and began to shake him violently.

“LEAVE ME BE!” I boomed, shaking him violently and trying to strangle his skeletal body. “JUST LET ME LIVE IN PEACE YOU FUCKER!” I screamed wildly, tears dripping from my eyes.

The smog dissipated and with it I felt a lack of resistance from Death. I stopped and realized I had killed him off... I had killed... Death... but just like so many times before with Derreck, there will be another sent after me until the day I finally and truly succumb to him... and when I do, I hope he chokes on it.

I stood up but felt blood dripping from my face. A set of dim lights nearby flickered to life, just barely enough to illuminate the sink they hung above. I slowly walked over, turning on the sink. Murky water spat out and nearly made me gag from the stench but soon enough it turned clear and I used it to wash myself clean.

Feeling a bit cleaner I looked to the mirror and perked a brow, noticing how it was covered in blood. Using the palm of my hand, I wiped away the blood to get a better look at myself. A light seemed to flash from the mirror and I was petrified from my reflection.

Deep scars were dug into my face and chest. My body was riddled with gaping bullet holes and stab wounds that bled profusely. My left eye was uncovered, glowing a hellish red with a slanted demonic pupil. A piece of slag jutted out from my forehead like a horn, twisted and mangled.

“Must be hard to look at your reflection...” he said to me.

“You're not... I'm not you,” I said back to myself and he just laughed.

“Sure your not... I'm just your reflection, a mirrored image of yourself. And here you are talking to your reflection like the maniac you truly are. Try as you might, those you love have finally saw you for what you truly are. But when, might I ask, will you stop believing the lies you've buried yourself under and come to realize yourself what you truly are?” he asked. My fists clenched.

“I'm not... what you are...” I growled.

“No? Oh... I'm sorry, I thought I was your mirrored reflection... you know, your exact reproduction? I guess it's just hard for you to accept it, being a ruthless murderer and all, killing for the sheer joy of it. Tell me... how good did it feel to slaughter those Gravelli thugs? Shoot them down with those railguns? Splatter them with Belladonna? A lot of them had families... foals... children who-” my fists clenched and I hammered a punch into the mirror, shattering it apart. My fist stayed connected with the broken mirror as my head dipped low, tears dripping from my eye, the second one covered by my eye patch.

Blood dripped from my knuckles that were sliced open from the broken shards of glass. “Hey,” came a voice from behind me. I looked up through a broken shard of mirror. I spotted Derreck behind me, standing in a doorway. “Come on, we got things to do, ponies to kill,” he told me with a faint and rather friendly smile.

I looked to my own reflection, bloodied and demonic as it was. A faint smile started to creep across my lips...

* * *

I awoke to the feel of warm sunshine basking in through a window and across my bare arms and chest. There was a light sheet placed over my lower body. My eye slowly opened and started to blur into focus. The first thing that started to come into focus was... grey... and blonde...

My eye finally came into focus and I looked in baffled expression to the sight before me. Derpy was passed out in a chair, her head tucked atop her hooves that rested on the nightstand beside my bed.

“Der... Derpy...” I whispered. I must've spoken a little loudly because her ears flickered and she jolted awake.

“Evan? EVAN!” She cheered, jumping onto the bed and hugging me tightly.

“Ugh... Derpy... uhh...” I groaned, a little bit sore but happy for the embrace regardless.

“They said you were really hurt bad. That your heart wasn't working but... is it really broken? You're not going to die are you?!” she gasped but I laughed and shook my head.

“No... no, I'm quite alive and planning on staying like that,” I assured the mare.

“Tail Twist Swear?” she asked.

I chuckled. “Well... I'm feeling a little bedridden for the time being but... maybe for now we'll just shake on it, whatta yah say?” I offered, and she quickly shook my hand.

“You better keep this promise, and keep living for a very, very, very, very-” she was cut off by another voice.

“Hey, you're up,” said the other voice. I looked over to see the red unicorn mare standing in the doorway, leaning a little on the door frame.

“Who's she?” Derpy asked. I went to speak but Echo cut in.

“I've told you a dozen times. My name is Echo. I'm not here to hurt him,” she insisted and I was a little confused at this point. Last I checked... Echo was with me last and...

“Hey Derpy... how'd you get here?” I asked, wondering how exactly she ended up tied into this.

“I saw your thingy-majig racing towards this town but when it stopped she pulled you out of the car and began to drag you across the ground!” Derpy said in a somewhat panicked voice.

“I told you, and I'll tell you again for the like... six hundrenth... thousandth... millionth, frickin' time. He's too heavy for me to levitate and it was all I could do but drag him here!” Echo snapped back.

“Wait! Okay... hold on... what's happening?!” I gasped in confusion.

Another voice entered the mix. “You almost died,” said a pony in white dress.

“And who the hell is this guy?” I asked, thrown into a world of confusion as we all looked to the stallion.

“I'm Doctor Hoofberry... but you can just call me Doc Hoof... most ponies around here do. You're very lucky Mr. uhh... Parker or Burdick?...” he said, looking to his clipboard of notes with a bit of confusion.

“Parker or Burdick?” I asked and he nodded scratching his head.

“It's uhh... what the notes say. It also said you had a heart attack and... could have very well died out there had Ms. Jewel here not rushed you to the hospital,” the doctor said and began checking off notes. “Well... in any case, you seem rather healthy and fit. Just take it easy for the next few days or you'll probably end up dropping dead. There's not much more we can do for you here and Ms. Jewel says your not much one to be kept down.” And with that the doctor left.

“Well... now that that's settled-” Echo went to enter the room but Derpy flew in front of her, wings splayed wide and not letting her past. “Hey! Would you knock it off?! I'm not here to hurt him!” Echo snapped impatiently.

“Derpy?... H-hey, what gives?” I asked, a little confused as to why Derpy was not only being so protective, but being protective against Echo of all ponies. Sure I may not know her very well but she didn't seem like a bad guy.

“I don't trust her. Who is she?” Derpy asked. I nearly laughed. To say she didn't trust her without even knowing her seemed a little... well, out of character really, but I rolled with it just as Echo began to speak.

“My name is-” I cut Echo short.

“She's my friend,” I said plainly, much to both of their shock. “It's okay Derpy. If she wanted me dead, she could've just left me to die out there. She's okay, you can let her in,” I told her.

Echo pushed past Derpy who seemed a little less than impressed but listened to me none the less. “Alright,” Echo began as she tossed me some clothes. “Ready to head out?” she asked and I rose a brow.

“Geeze man I just got up... I just had a heart attack... can't I least have a glass of orange juice or something?” I chuckled. Echo looked to me with an unimpressed look but Derpy cut in.

“She's been trying to wake you up for the past few days, but I told her you needed your rest!” Derpy said sternly and I blinked.

“Wait... Last few days? Jeeze, how long have I been out?” I asked, Echo speaking first.

“Too long-” Derpy cut her short.

“Three days. You needed your rest. Your heart was attacked!” Derpy stated, a little dopeishly but still adorably.

“Ahahahaha... okay, well... alright. Derpy I... thank you, for letting me sleep, but Echo is kind of right. We have urgent business to do and we can't be late but...” I stroked her cheek. “Thank you, for protecting me.”

She nuzzled her cheek into my hand as I rubbed her. “But Echo... it'll have to wait for now,” I stated, much to her sudden distress. “Derpy and I gotta play a board game... it's kinda like... tradition, that we do that when one of us is in the hospital,” I told her and she scoffed with a 'Humph'.

“They don't have Chest here but... they have this game,” Derpy said, bringing up a game labelled 'Scrabble'. I smiled. For a seemingly dopey mare, she always picked the more challenging games and would no doubt burn me in this one too.

“Oh come on!” Echo scowled. “That game could take hours,” she interjected but irregardless I cleared a spot on the nightstand for Derpy and I to play.

“Echo... relax... say we had the most important job in the world to do... what's the point of always rushing around to stay alive if... you never truly live? If you keep rushing through life it'll just... sssssip!” I flashed my index finger passed my face. “Flash right before your eyes, and if that happens... did you really live?” I asked and she blinked. “It's the little things like... playing Scrabble with you best friend that makes life worth living... the taste of... hey could you get us some orange juice?”

Echo just rolled her eyes and moseyed out of the hospital room. I looked to Derpy who looked back to me with those big, cute, dopey eyes of hers. I chuckled for no apparent reason. “You go first Derpy...”

* * *

Hours later...

Echo watched as we played our twentieth something game. Derpy twitched her lip, looking to the board. She looked to the dictionary, then to the board... to the dictionary... to the board... to the dictionary...

Rubbing her chin, she began to build a word off of the 'O' on my 'Hello'.

She slowly spelled out the sword before pronouncing it. “F-E-L-L-A-T-I-O... Fell-lay-shio,” Derpy said in her innocent derpy voice, making me stifle a laugh, Echo's face going pale.

Derpy looked to the two of us. “What?” she asked, dumbfounded about what was so funny.

“Derpy... do you... what?” I asked and she pointed out the word in the dictionary.

“It's right there. Fellatio...” she trailed off and began to read the inscription. “To perform-” I cut her off, yanking the dictionary from her. Thank goddess she didn't know what the term meant.

“Ahahahaha... okay Derpy... okay, you win,” I said, her over-joyous face brightening up like it had the last two dozen times she'd won. I finished off the last bits of my salad I had gotten along with the apple juice before sighing. “Well Derpy... hate to say it but Echo and I have a job to do,” I informed the grey mare before giving her mane a tuffle.

She gave me a frowny face, shaking her head and reverting her hair back to the way it was before. Standing up, I slipped on the clothes Echo had brought me and with one final hug to Derpy, Echo and I made our leave.

As we made our way to the exit, Echo looked to me. “What's with that mare anyway?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“She's innocent,” I stated but she rolled her eyes.

“No, I meant with me. She saw me bring you to the hospital but... she acted all freakish, saying I couldn't be trusted... what's with that?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“She's my best friend... and also my first ever friend... perhaps one of the last real friends I have... she's just a little protective and if she doesn't like somepony, who can really tell her not to. She just doesn't want to see me hurt... and vice-versa. Truth be told... hay, I just had a heart attack, I could use some rest,” I laughed but groaned as we got outside and I saw the condition of the car. It was pretty trashed. The tires were shredded and deflated, the fenders and roof were pretty smashed, exhaust was hanging low and it looked like it was leaking fluid.

“Oh boy...” I trailed off.

“What?” Echo asked back.

“It's going to be a long walk...”

Author's Note

Yeah, I meant to get this out last week, like always I ended up procrastinating cause... I'm a terrible person. But anyway, cheers to you all, EH! //

Derreck leveled the gun towards Echo. "Give me one reason I shouldn't cap this snaky bitch right here and now, ESPECIALLY after what she just did to you?!" Derreck boomed.

My hand rested atop the barrel of his H&K MK.23. "Because..." I trailed off, not having very good ground. Tears trickled down my face as I stifled back the sorrows of bitter betrayal. "Just..." Slowly, Derreck began to lower the handgun. His eye squinted, a bitter look, one of resenting hatred, fiercely shot towards Echo.

"When we're done here... I'm gonna cut you up into little pieces and feed you to the wolves you stupid bitch!"

Chapter 67

'Trust...'

Screaming and yelling... men roaring as they charged forwards. It echoed all around, even surpassing the noise generated by the thundering tanks. Gunfire, explosions, canons... all going off... artillery in the far off distance bombing the hell out of the battlefield.

My body was pulled off the ground, mud covering my face, along with my new service rifle. A hand wiped my face for me, the big man before me quickly doing his best to clean my face of any debris.

The dark storm clouds above us smothered out all traces of the sun, but were illuminated by the orange haze of burning buildings, flashes in the sky illuminated constantly like that of lightning, but in reality each flash came from a canon or something there of.

“Come on, the war won't win itself!” my big friend ordered as he began to pull me along, his scoped rifle carried along in his free hand. Rushing along, my head thumped and pounded, heart racing as bullets whizzed by us, explosions from mortar fire erupting just a few dozen feet away from us.

Some of our comrades charged alongside us, most being cut down in a matter of seconds or falling behind our incredible pace as we mindlessly rushed onward. Coming to a street corner, Derreck suddenly heaved me through a ramshackle window just as a stray bullet sprang off the wall where I had been standing in front of.

Himself hopping through the window, he pinned me to the ground. “Stay low... and follow me. There is a sniper in our midst,” he informed me and we slowly began to crawl along the floor, the battle outside continuing without us.

Coming to a stop, my big friend took a knee, leaning up against a semi-intact wall and peeping out through a crack. Looking back to me, he spoke. “Put your helmet on your knife, then slowly raise your helmet to the windowsill,” my friend ordered.

I did as he asked, carefully shimmying under the windowsill and raising my helmet with my knife. As the helmet neared visual height, my big friend began to speak. “And the so-called German elite sniper sees a Russian soldier peeking down to the street below... unaware he is being watched... the German sniper takes aim on the unknowing Russian and-” he is cut off as my helmet is suddenly blown away, a sniper shot blasting it.

My big friend took aim with his Mosin sniper rifle, taking steady aim as he spoke. “Little did the German know... he was being watched all along...” my friend trailed off as he slowly squeezed the trigger, the gun going off like a canon inside the bombed out room.

“And then, there was no more German sniper...” he trailed off and looked to me, reaching down to help me up off the floor. “Come, there will be more-”

* * *

My body jolted as I was poked in the side. I was kneeling, elbows on a table and my hands clasped together in front of my face.

“So what are we actually doing?” Echo began. “You've been 'praying' for over two hours...” she trailed off, wanting me to pick up.

“I uhm... well... I have a lot to repent for...” I replied and she perked a brow.

“Repent?” she asked curiously.

“To feel sorrow and guilt for sin,” I replied, looking up to the holy cross. It was a little different than the ones back on my world, this one instead being that of a pony version of Jesus. I wondered to myself that if this world was ruled by mystical princesses and the weather was controlled by pegasi... how exactly god and religion played into everything, but in the end just shrugged it off.

“This is silly. Can't you do this after?” she asked me but I stayed quiet. She huffed as I began to whisper my prayers, asking for forgiveness and to forgive me as I was about to sin yet again, though for the greater of ponykind.

“What are you saying?” Echo asked, leaning in to listen but I held my hand out, having her keep distance.

“My prayers are my own, and nopony else's. They are between myself and thy lord... but if you wish...” I trailed off and motioned to a spot beside me. “Perhaps you have something to repent for as well?” I offered but she shook her head.

“Listen Evan, it's okay and all that you believe in this but... it all seems pretty stupid and made up to me. Religion was never my thing, I'm a mare of science,” she replied and I just shrugged, then continued my prayers.

Echo sighed as I continued but I paid her no mind, finally finishing my prayers. “Amen.” I took one final look up to the cross... to the pony Jesus, crucified, whom was looking down to me.

A lone tear trickled out of my good eye, my damaged eye rather unresponsive. “Are you done yet?” Echo asked, a little impatient. I gently motioned for her to hush.

“Echo, you may not believe or have faith but please... do have a little respect,” I ushered and she exhaled.

“I don't mean disrespect, but we've been taking so many detours-” she was cut off as I opened the door to the lonesome church, a gust of wind blustering past. The church was in the middle of a barren field, a little run down and completely devoid of life, aside from the two of us.

I removed my heavy duster coat and offered it to her, Echo giving me a strange look. “It's mighty cold out there... figured you might want this. I'll be fine without it,” I replied, zipping up the combat suit that Rarity made me. Looking out to the sunset, I sighed. We were close, but still a day's walk away...

* * *

Third person,

Elsewhere...

A slime green stallion with two tone mane and hair stood before a lonesome trailer home. He featured the build of a gentlestallion. Combed mane and tail, brushed fur, refined suit coat. A mare sat on the steps of the trailer before him, being a little bit more lax in appearance.

Aside from her mane being rather well combed, the rest of her was disorganized. Her shirt was dirty with stains, her fur was rustled and patchy, and she didn't have much in the way of makeup for her facial features, being battered and scarred worse than most ponies would ever see.

She might strike one as a Frankenpony. She twirled a glass of whiskey around before pounding it back, then tossing aside the glass and simply drinking straight from the source.

Liquid huffed in slight dissatisfaction. Belle stifled a laugh, a bit of whiskey spewing out from her nostrils. “Agh! Damn! That... feels pretty good actually,” she commented before looking to Liquid. “So... the bitch woke up huh?” Belle asked rhetorically.

Liquid let out an unsettled exhale. “I'd prefer it if... you don't address her as such,” he told her in a calm yet very monotone voice. Belle looked to him, her facial features twisting into a frown as she glared at him with her one hellish red eye, the other missing and patched over.

“You know how I feel about her...” Belle trailed off in a disgruntled way and Liquid just sighed again.

“I know that... there's a stake driven between the two of you and that... the last time you and I saw each other wasn't... pleasant for either of us... but she is coming for us, and she's coming for blood,” Liquid said, his monotone voice rising in volume but just ever so slightly.

Belle combed the side of her mane over her damaged ear, the tip having been chewed off in a fight and as a result giving her an even more gruesome look.

“And you say she...” Belle trailed off, looking down to her bottle of nearly depleted whiskey. Looking back up to Liquid, she chuckled. “Killed... Death itself?” she laughed and Liquid joined in with her chuckle.

“No...” Liquid said in a more pleasant demeanor. "No, he wasn't actually... Death incarnate... he just called himself 'The Face of Death',” Liquid replied with a faint smile. Belle chuckling before her face turned to a more serious expression.

“So... why'd he call himself that?” she asked, no longer laughing about the matter.

Liquid just shrugged and laughed. “I dunno... I suppose he thought it... sounded cool. Should have called himself 'The mouthpiece',” Liquid smiled and Belle stifled a laugh before downing some more whiskey.

“Well ain't that the truth... but irregardless, I heard that bastard could heal any wound. Never die. Something about his soul being immortal, enchanted by dark magic. Cursed to forever walk Equestria while those he holds dear die all around him... heard he once regenerated after being completely disintegrated... and now 'she'... just somehow... found... a way to kill him?” Belle asked but Liquid shook his head.

“No... well, yes. The Face of Death was supposed to be immortal... as the legend goes... his very soul itself was cursed by dark magic... but it was not Echo he fell to, but rather a new companion of hers. It would seem that she has hired... a mercenary of sorts, one who is known as 'The White Skull'.” Liquid stood before her as Belle finished off her drink, taking a close look at the bottle before pitching it.

“The White Skull?” she asked curiously and Liquid nodded. “Who in Tartarus would call themselves that?” the mare asked and Liquid just shrugged.

“I'm sure he goes by something different but... that's just what ponies have started calling him. Apparently he wears a shirt with a white skull on it... or a white cross. Apparently he walks Equestria as a... punisher to the evil, a light in the darkness... or so they say,” Liquid informed. Belle leaned back, sighing to herself.

“And this... this punisher of evil, he... killed The Face of Death?” Liquid nodded. “And she has hired him to come after us?” Belle asked, to which Liquid merely nodded before speaking.

“It would appear so...” Liquid trailed off in silence before Belle quickly picked up with a laugh.

“Well damn... that bitch sure knows how to hold a grudge,” the mare laughed and Liquid looked to her with a silent glare, to which Belle quickly returned. “Or maybe... 'you'... just bring that out in ponies,” she quipped and Liquid sighed.

“I know that... my choice, didn't exactly please you but... I can't very well please everypony, now can I? Even if I could reverse time, I would make the same choice without a second thought... it's just the way it is, Belle,” Liquid told her sternly but the mare just scoffed.

“So then why are you here?” she asked in a cold way.

“Because I need your help. We need to stand together to stop her because... unless you stop hating me for who I chose, and start being afraid of her... then there is no doubt in my mind, she... or rather, her friend, will kill us all, and he'll be none the wiser,” Liquid stated. Belle sat there for a moment, considering for a moment to make another quippy comment but then deciding upon a more serious answer. She looked to him with a thousand yard expression, one that wasn't too gloomy but showed she had lost most hope in life.

“I... won't try to dodge guilt or... snake my way out of what I have comin'...” she mentioned and Liquid exhaled in an emotional way.

“Can't we just... let it all go? Forget the past?” Liquid mused and Belle returned his stare with a faint emotional one.

“After what we did...” Belle bit her lip for a moment as she pondered her thoughts. “That mare... deserves her revenge, and we deserve to die...” she trailed off and the duo simply stared at each other for a long period of silence.

A gust of sandy wind blew past the trailer home, emptiness all around. Belle broke the silence with a laugh. “Ah-ha-ha... but then again... so does she, so... we'll just have to wait and see... won't we?” Belle asked as she took out another bottle of whiskey...

* * *

Echo walked along the trail, illuminated by nothing more than the moon's gaze. The long, thick material duster coat kept her warm and cozy, the flaps dangling and dragging across the ground due to the coat's owner dawning a much larger frame.

A gentle breeze blew by, one that was enough to reveal her utility belt. The pearlized hilt of her knife glinting just slightly before the flaps of the coat settled against her sides once more.

Her companion walked tall, upright and with a powerful stance. The black fabric suit clung tight to his body. Though his aged facial features would depict him as one in his sixties, the man possessed physical prowess like that of a man in his prime years.

As they walked along the big man looked towards her, his gentle facial expression one of comfort for the mare. The handle of his massive handcannon gleamed in the night, the pearl grips sporting the legendary holy cross.

"Evan?" Echo asked gently, the man nodding. "Back at the hospital... you told that ditzy mare that... I was your friend..." she trailed off, hoping for him to pick up.

"Yeah... so?" he replied back casually.

"Did you... mean that?" she asked and he just nodded.

"Well sure... I mean... yeah. I trust you," he informed her, his words sinking deep.

"R-really? Y-you... trust me?" she asked and he nodded. "W-why?" she asked, hating herself inside just ever so slightly.

"Well I mean... you saved my life kid. If I didn't trust you after that... then... ha-ha," he chuckled. The mare smiled gingerly as they shared a brief moment of laughter.

“So...” Evan asked casually, gaining Echo's attention.

“So?” she asked back, not really getting a defined question.

“Well... what's your cutie mark supposed to mean?” he asked, her face flushing a deep hue of red as she tried to cover her flank with the duster coat, only to notice it was fully covered already.

“H-ha-have you been... ch-checking me out?” she stammered in a flustered way but the man shook his head.

“No... I took notice of it when we first met but never bothered to ask. I was... just wondering,” he replied calmly and without a hint of any intentions. Echo tried feverishly to conceal her growing blush but did a horrible job of doing so.

“W-w-well... I mean... ah-ha-ha... it's kind of silly really,” she chimed timidly and pulled aside the duster coat flaps around her flank, revealing her cutie mark. It was a long staff with a bladed hook at the top, with a sapphire stone near the base of the blade.

Evan looked to her flank, Echo's blush intensifying further. “D-don't look at me l-like that!” she squeaked, quickly covering herself. Evan just shrugged innocently as they continued on.

“So what does it mean? I hardly think that has much to do with science...” Evan inquired, Echo's facial expression going pale for a moment before picking up.

“W-well... it doesn't. You see... I always had a knack with bladed weaponry but... not for fighting, mostly for cutting up vegetables and fruits... and the sapphire stone means I'm an expert with identifying all manners of gems...” she trailed off and the man perked a brow.

Echo giggled and bumped into him playfully. “What? I was a kid once, you know. I liked... shiny things. Then as I got older I learned pretty quick how to cook and bake... that's why I keep this...” she trailed off and removed her concealed knife, the custom pearl grip nearly glowing under the moon's illumination. “As a reminder,” she informed him before sheathing it once more. "The handle broke when I was cutting up some apples, so I made it a handle out of some pearls I had... the two things I loved most in life..."

“So how'd you end up as a doctor?” Evan replied and she gave him a stunned look.

“A what?!” she commented back and Evan shook his head.

“Err... I mean, science... pony?” he asked, his lack of intelligence showing a little, making Echo giggle even more.

“Ah-ha... okay, I'll give you that one. I dunno, I just sort of... I dunno... eventually lost interest in gems when I got older. Started researching science and magic then... one day, BAM! I'm a scientist working at an academy in Hoofington... who woulda thunk it, huh?” she replied and the big man just shrugged, not knowing how to reply.

The duo continued on their path, gentle and frigid winds blowing past but still no signs of snow. Echo looked up to the moon glowing down upon them. A content feeling came across her as she looked to her big friend. The one who protected her... cared for her...

She leaned against him and he nearly gasped. “Ugh! S-sor-sorry...” he stammered nervously, nearly shaking as he stepped to the side. Echo gave him a confused look, her brow cocked high.

“What?” she asked, baffled and confused.

“I shouldn't take up so much of the path. Here you are nearly walking on the grass and...” he trailed off and took a step further away to give Echo more room on the trail. She rolled her eyes and trotted closer to the man yet again, trying to lean against him once more but again he sidestepped away. “Okay, now that's not even fair. You'd pretty much have the entire path to yourself,” Evan mentioned and Echo again rose her brows before sighing.

“No, you...” Echo trailed off before she could comment about his inability to notice affection. “I just want to lean against you,” she informed him.

“Well, if you're tired we could stop and make camp,” the man made note, his stupidity nearly making Echo fall over.

“I... I'm not... no, I-” she was cut off by Evan's grumbling stomach. She blinked in disbelief at the man's naive nature, not knowing how one could possibly be so dense.

However, despite this, the man was not naive towards his obvious hunger. “Well...” he trailed off and pointed to a small clearing near the path. “I think we'll make camp there,” he stated, unslinging the heavy pack on his back and setting it down.

Echo watched as the man quickly scrounged together a few sticks of kindling and paper then lit it up. Taking out some equipment, he set up a small stand over the fire, pouring water from his canteen into the pot and bringing it to a boil over the fire.

Evan broke Echo's train of thought with a rather simple question, but one that threw her off none the less. “Macaroni or instant noodles?” he asked, Echo being thrown back into reality.

“Huh... w-what?” she stammered and the man chuckled a brief laugh.

“I know it's not exactly five star but... macaroni or oriental noodles for supper?” he asked, still leaving Echo a stammering mess.

“Uhh... huh, I uhh... oriental macaroni?” she asked blankly and the man laughed.

“Well... uhm, I guess I'll just surprise you then,” he chuckled before adding a pack of dried oriental noodles to the water. Echo shook off the confusion and trotted out to the barren meadow that surrounded them. Most of the grass had withered and died off for the season. The ground was pretty stiff and hard, a result of the more frosty temperatures.

As she wandered along, she began to think back on the adventure they had embarked on. All the moments up until now. All the things the man... or rather, the two men, had taught her. All the compassion and care Evan had showed towards her. His selfless nature. His...

Looking back to the small campsite, Echo took note the man had shed the black combat suit and was in nothing more than a pair of underwear. A blush came across her cheeks as she bashfully turned away, leaving the man to his privacy.

She wandered out a little further, getting lost in thought. She began to drift into memories of her foalhood. Back when she used to collect gemstones just for the fun of it, collecting mass hoards and hiding them away, pretending she was a pirate or sometimes having treasure hunts with her friends.

She sighed as she remembered getting a little older and learning how to better use cutlery, both in passive and offensive ways, the latter mostly to make pretending to be a pirate a little more realistic.

Her thoughts drifted to that of when she met Liquid, how he had taught her so many things and how he had eventually-

A whistle broke her thoughts and she looked over to see the man waving to her. “They're done!” he called out. Echo came trotting back, noticing how the man was, oddly enough, still only dressed in his underwear.

Echo came over and rose a brow as she looked to the food the man had created. “Voila! Oriental noodles coated in macaroni cheese sauce... surprised?” he asked and the mare just blinked. “I know, I know, but hey... you were the one who suggested oriental macaroni,” he laughed, serving her a bowl of the strangely made food.

She shook off the baffled thoughts she had and decided to at least try it. Even if she was struck in confusion at the time, she had, non-knowingly, suggested the dish. Taking the chopsticks ever so carefully, she fed herself a small amount, mouthing it around to get a taste before swallowing.

It was hard for her to decipher but she ended on the thought that it wasn't too bad. The man looked to her, cheese sauce splattered across his lips. “Not bad, eh?” he replied as he licked his lips then slurped some more noodles, a long stringy one slapping at his face and giving him a cheesy whiplash.

The duo giggled as the man wiped his face off then licked the sauce from the palm of his hands and off his fingers, sucking them clean. The flames of the camp fire flickered beside them, illuminating them both in a mix of shadows and light. Echo watched in curiosity as the man suckled his fingers clean, a small hint of arousal striking her as she watched.

As soon as it hit her however, she forced it away, thinking nothing of it. The two of them chowed down on the strange dish, mostly in silence. Echo looked to the man's body, noticing how he wasn't shivering in the slightest despite the cold.

She also took note that despite his body having been aged, he still sported a strong, powerful appearance, one that would shadow most full grown stallions. Unlike Derreck, his body didn't appear as though it could have been chiseled from stone, but still had a smooth and soft looking appearance.

“Aren't you cold?” she asked and the man nodded. “So why don't you put something on?” she asked and he looked beneath him.

“Well... I was planning on snuggling into my sleeping bag after this but... well, that combat suit insulates body heat and what not... including body odors, so it'll start to stink pretty bad if I don't take off every now and then.

Echo took note of how warm it was under clothing while sitting this close to the fire, and how the duster coat was starting to get a little too toasty. She quickly shed the outer layer of clothing and relaxed with a sigh. “Huh... never noticed how hot it was getting,” she mentioned.

“Well... enjoy it while it lasts. Don't have anymore kindling. Had just enough for a small campfire to cook some noodles... oriental macaroni,” he laughed as he snuggled into his sleeping bag.

Echo sat outside her bag for a little longer, just watching the crackling fire as it started to die down. She turned to him with a more pressing issue. “So, tomorrow-” she was cut off by the man.

“Sssh, let's not talk about that,” he whispered and she rose a brow, figuring the topic to be pretty important. “Just... let it go for one night. Don't think about it. Replace all the hatred and vengeance with... happy thoughts,” he replied and she cocked a brow.

“Like what? This is the whole reason we're-” she was again cut off by the man whom sat up to speak.

“Wouldn't it be great to have some marshmallows right now? Roasting them over embers is perfect,” he stated and she was thrown into slight confusion. How did he get marshmallows from talking about what they had to do?

“Marshmallows?” she asked and he nodded.

“Yeah. Like... white, fluffy treats? Made mostly of sugar... you cook them over campfires... or make cookie biscuits with them...” he trailed off with a sigh. “Yeah... I remember as a kid, going out with my buddies, pitching a tent and having nothing but marshmallows and hotdogs for the weekend,” he informed her.

“Hotdogs?” she asked, having no idea what those were, and the man brushed it off.

“Uhh, never mind. Back on my world they were these deliciously... terrible food, made mostly of fatty chemicals and... anyway, haven't you ever roasted marshmallows before?” he asked and she nodded.

“I was a filly once, you know,” she commented and the man nodded.

“So talk about it...” he trailed off and she tilted her head to one side.

“About what?” she asked.

“Your foalhood... being a filly. Fun times, great memories... happy things?” he replied, laying back down and tucking his hands behind his head in a relaxed way. She looked to the man, most of his bulky torso still exposed, the fire casting shadows over his body.

“Well... I never got around to doing much...” she trailed off, figuring the man would drop it but instead he cocked his head up and looked to her with a 'Really?' kind of look. “I mean... well I wasn't too... I didn't... I guess a few times I hid some gems, made a treasure map and me and some friends tracked down the gems I hid...” she trailed off, most of her sentence a mutter.

“You guys probably laughed... squealed in excitement...” the man noted softly and Echo rolled her eyes but a faint smile still none-the-less crossed her lips as she stifled a chuckle.

“Well... I made a map, labeling it 'Peg Leg's treasure!'... a skull and crossbones was the mark of where the treasure was burried... I rolled up the map and stuck it in a bottle then tossed it in my friend's back yard. It wasn't long before she got us all to come over to her house... we were so young and silly... she actually thought it was Peg Leg's secret map to his treasure...” Echo trailed off, a tear of happiness trickling down her cheek.

“We spent nearly a week trying to find that... heh-heh, I think at one point I actually forgot I had buried the treasure and actually believed we were searching for Peg Leg's loot...” she trailed off, reminiscing in the memory.

“So what happened?” the man asked and Echo giggled.

“Well... eventually we found it... heh-heh... we felt like we had accomplished the greatest thing in the world... so, being young fillies and all, we traded in the gems at the local general store for some candy. I had spoke with the general store owner before that, and had him play like he really believed we had found Peg Leg's treasure... gosh, we got so much candy... I got a cavity from that actually,” she laughed, the man adding in a faint chuckle but had a smile just as bright as her own.

“See?” the man asked and at first she was confused by what he meant. “Happy thoughts,” he told her and she finally realized what he had meant. In that short time, she had completely forgotten about her vengeance and instead focused on the things that made life wonderful.

He leaned back and sighed, looking to the stars, and to the moon. Echo watched the man, slowly examining his body. How his chest lifted and settled with every breath. How his skin flickered with shadows from the now dim illumination of the dying campfire.

He seemed so dreamy-

She cut her thoughts short before her arousal spiked. Even so, she couldn't help but admire his body and physique. The man shivered briefly before snuggling into his bag. “Man... I'm really cold now...” he commented and Echo couldn't help herself but tease.

“Well... what if I helped you keep warm tonight?” she offered in a rather suggestive tone. The man blinked before nodding.

“Oh, hey, yeah that's a great idea! You're a unicorn,” he stated and she was nearly thrown back from his statement.

“W-wha... what does that have to do with it?” she asked, a little dumbfounded.

“Well, you could just cast a spell to keep the fire going and hot, right?” he asked and she dipped her head with a sigh that was followed by a soft giggling laugh.

“No... I may be a unicorn but I'm not that skilled with magic... no, I had something a little different in mind,” she informed him and he rose a brow.

“Well... but if you don't-” he cut himself off as Echo slowly took off her cloak and utility belt, using her hindleg to kick the belt aside before crawling towards him, swaying her flank side to side in a most suggestive way. The man swallowed hard as she crawled over his covered body.

“Wha-what are y-you d-doing?” he nearly gasped as her horn lit up, the zipper to his sleeping bag coming undone. The man's body began to shiver and shake in nervousness as Echo crawled atop his body, their bare bodies rubbing together as she sealed the bag once more.

“Keeping you warm,” Echo said to him in a hushed tone before she felt a rising presence growing between his legs. She smiled faintly, and rather coyly, as her own arousal began to strike her. The man's soft body against hers felt wonderful, sensual... erotic.

She took notice that the man was still shaking nervously. She leaned down and kissed him on the cheek. “Just relax, I'll keep you warm,” she told him, but it only made the situation worsen as he began to jabber out random stuttered sentences.

“B-b-bah-but y-you're... I mean, I-I-I'M a... y-y-you...” he kept stammering as his member rose to full height, a sign of his body's natural arousal, though not a mental one. She ground her hips into his, her nethers getting moist and spreading her nectar against his briefs, dampening them slightly.

She leaned against his body with a quiet moan. “Just keep your hands away from my flanks...” she trailed off and leaned close to his ear. “Unless I tell you to...” she hushed into his ear, grinding her moist lips against his covered shaft. The smell of her arousal, and his musk, quickly spread through the enclosed sleeping bag.

Her horn lit up and began to tug on the waist of his undies. “You know... we can get warmer if you're not wearing anything,” she teased in a somewhat lustful voice, lost in her built up arousal.

Before another word could be spoke, before she could even blink, then man's body tensed and he slid himself out of the blanket in a blitz of motion, so fast Echo barely even saw him move.

He stood before her, naked due to his underwear being caught in her magical grasp. She was taken away in confusion as the man snatched up his battledress and holstered handgun. “Forget it!” he growled. “Not happening!” He stormed off, completely nude but seemingly unaffected by the cold exterior temperatures.

Echo was left in total, and rather baffled, shock by the fact the man hadn't made love with her...

Evan stormed into a small encirclement of trees, a pond of water in the middle but frozen over from the cold. The man hung up his uniform and handgun off a nearby tree branch before kneeling down to the ice covered pond and pressing his hand to it.

There was a bright, shimmering glow and within a matter of seconds, the ice melted away and the pond came back to life. Steaming with a comfortable, perhaps mildly hot, temperature, the man stepped into the oasis.

He let his body relax in the hot water, soaking away his problems and revitalizing his body and mind. He let his body float around in the water, calm as calm could be. The steam from the heat of the water made the area look like a sauna...

His hands stroked along his rather smooth and rippling body. They slowed every time he neared a scar, slowly trickling water over the old marks and caressing the area with his palms. He removed his eye patch for the time, stroking his left hand over the eye. The entire eye, iris, pupil and all, looked incredibly fogged, tainted white from the frostbite and inner damage he had received that he refused to have fixed.

It was only after his body began to prune did he slowly, and most regretfully, step out of the hot sauna-like pond. Wiping himself down with just his hands, he shook off before slipping into the battle suit and strapping the holy hand cannon to his thigh.

A look of plain expression came across his face as he walked back to the campfire, where a frantic Echo rushed over. “Evan, please, I'm so sorry I-” she was cut off as Evan held up his hand, covered by the textured fabric of the suit.

“Forget about it,” he told her before walking back to the campsite.

“Evan I just... I just kinda lost myself and-” again she was cut off as the man held up his hand.

“I said it before... forget it happened,” he said sternly, in a rather concerning deepening tone. Echo bit her lip as she sat down, guilt flowing through her for being so pushy and rushing things. She knew she shouldn't have but she almost thought for a moment he would have wanted that.

As she tried to come to terms with herself, she took notice the man was standing on the other side of the dying fire, back to her and looking out to the emptiness around them. “E-Evan... what are you doing?” she asked cautiously, not wanting to put further strain on their friendship, if that's what one would call it anymore.

“Standing guard,” he replied in a monotone voice. Echo nearly gasped.

“But you haven't slept in over a day! You must be exhausted. You just got out of the hospital for a heart attack the other day and haven't slept since!” she exclaimed and he nodded knowingly.

“I know. But after tomorrow's done... I can sleep all I want... so get some rest, tomorrow's gonna be a big day,” he told her but she rushed around to his front side.

“No way. We both gotta be on our ball game for this! I'll take first watch. You need some rest!” Echo tried to plead with him but he'd have none of it. “Evan, please. You can't push yourself that hard. Please just...” she trailed off and looked to him, trying to force tears to her eyes to get her point across.

He looked back to the sleeping bags. “You should get some rest kid. Don't worry, I won't let my guard down. You can trust me,” he assured her. Knowing she wouldn't be able change his mind, she instead began to walk back towards the sleeping bags.

Her ears perked as the man let out a long yawn of exhaustion, shaking his head and wiping his eye. Obvious to anypony who saw him, he was brutally exhausted, and pushing his body beyond every limit.

In her mind, she prayed for forgiveness as her horn began to glow. “I'm sorry,” she whispered just as she released a blasting spell that struck the big man in the back of the head. A lone gasp left his mouth as his eyes rolled into the back of his head, his body falling to the ground in a motionless heap.

His breathing resumed at a normal pace, but was interrupted every so often by a snore. “You need it more than I do,” Echo said in a caring way as she levitated over the man's sleeping bag and covered him with it.

Echo stood lonesome, letting the cool air calm her nerves. She thought for a moment what had come over her just prior. She knew she had begun to grow fond and affectionate for the man but never thought she'd fall for him. She let out a sigh, not looking back to him.

“I'm so sorry... for everything...” she hushed out an apology. A somewhat powerful gust of wind blustered past, one of unnatural origin. With it, the campfire was suddenly put out, even the ground where it had burned ceased to give off heat. Echo gasped as the fire was put out, the area now pitched in darkness, lit by nothing but the night sky above.

“Aww... drat...” she cursed, going over to inspect it, hoping there was still some way she could start the fire once again. As she inspected the fire, a towering presence rose up behind her, one of its eyes glowing a hellish red.

At first it had a very proper bipedal stance, but soon its shoulders began to spread out, its back hunched ever so slightly. His face protruded just ever so slightly, turning into a bit of a muzzle as his canines grew to unnatural size, the rest of his teeth becoming razor sharp. Long facial hair grew out around his cheeks and muzzle, giving him a wild appearance as he let out a most feral snarl.

The snarl caught Echo's attention but she barely even got to turn as the beast pounced upon her, tackling her to the ground with ferocious force. She let out a scream but as she felt the texture of its clothing, she knew whom it was.

“EVAN! IT'S ME!” She cried out but the beast lashed out wildly at her, nipping its teeth at her face. “EVAN, IT'S ME! ECHO!” she screamed out in fright, a little shocked that the man was somehow awake. Her spell had enough power to put anypony soundly to sleep for more than six hours... but perhaps he was far from similar to a pony.

The beast leaned its face close, its deep scars clearly visible and its bad eye glowing hellish red. “But it's not me!” the beast growled and Echo realized the dire situation she was in. Her horn lit up and blasted him in the face with a powerful energy surge but it barely even fizzled his facial fur.

“I should've known!” the feral Derreck grumbled as grabbed Echo by the throat with one hand and stood up, suspending her in the air. Her hindlegs kicked and flailed as both her forehooves tried to pry his hand from her throat, but to no avail. The beast's grip around her throat tightened immensely, threatening to snap her neck if he applied any more force. His entire physique bulked up, his now immense size stretching the fabric of his suit.

“Der- plea...” she gasped for air, barely able to even breath, let alone speak. Derreck threw her to the ground, with rather brutal force. Her body skipped along a few feet before she skidded to a stop, grunting in pain as several scratches stung with pain, dribbles of blood leaking from the scratches.

“Ahh... Derreck... please...” she cried out as she tried to crawl away from the lumbering beast.

SNIKT

From between his knuckles sprang the perfectly sharpened metallic blades, coated in a dark blue aura. He began to slowly and most ominously walk towards her while she tried feverishly to crawl away. “Please... please I didn't-” she was cut off by a loud snarl from the man.

“Everypony is sorry once it's too late... only once the damage has been done!” Derreck launched himself forward, cocking his bladed claws back for a fatal strike. Echo's eyes went wide as she faced what was sure to be her death.

A lone cry echoed throughout the empty fields as Derreck swung hard. Echo clenched her eyes and kept them shut, shuddering and shivering in fear as she waited for the inevitable...

But it never came. Instead she heard a crackling of energy. Opening her eyes, she gasped at the sight before her. Evan stood, a bit of a crouch in his stance as he held his left hand towards the other man.

Derreck's blades were just inches from the palm of Evan's hand, being stopped mid-strike by a powerful kinetic shield. Derreck grunted as his blades caused the shield to fizzle and crackle, but it held none the less. The shield sputtered and crackled, spurts of glossy blue energy fizzling to the ground from the strike point of where Derreck's blades were trying to penetrate. “Wha... what are you... doing?!” Derreck grumbled to the smaller man.

Evan placed his second hand behind the first, the intensity of the shield growing as he did so. “The... right thing...” he growled back just moments before there was a shock wave emitted from his palms, the force and momentum of Derreck's strike blown outwards.

The shock wave knocked Derreck back, propelling him through the air. He flipped mid-flight and landed on his feet. His eyes went wide as he realized he had nearly struck down his closest friend while trying to cut down Echo.

Rushing forwards at a blinding speed, Derreck caught the man just as he was about to collapse. Catching the man in his burly arms, he knelt down. Echo gasped and went to rush over but Derreck drew out Belladonna, lining up the sights with her head.

“Stay the fuck back, or I'll plug yah!” Derreck snarled, Echo nearly dropping to the ground in fright. He looked back down to Evan who was now in tears. There was a long silence before Derreck spoke. “Why did you spare her life?” he grumbled and Evan spoke through sniffled tears.

“I... I just... she-” Derreck cut him short.

“She shot you in the back!” he responded, to which Echo cut in.

“I put him to sleep!” she lashed out and the man looked to her with a petrifying glare.

“BY SHOOTING HIM IN THE FUCKING BACK!” he roared, making Echo back off for the time being. Evan continued to whimper in sadness and Derreck looked up to the mare. “Why don't you tell him?!” he roared at her, making her flinch.

“Tell him what?!” she yelled back, but in a voice not nearly as terrifying as the big man's.

“The truth!” he boomed and she scoffed at him.

“Yes... I know I shot you in the back, but I was just trying-” she was cut short by the man swearing.

“FUCK OFF WITH THAT HORSESHIT! Tell him why we're here! Tell him why we're after Liquid! Tell him everything!” Derreck boomed like thunder. Echo's words got caught up in her throat and she swallowed hard.

“W-what... what are you talking-” Derreck quickly cut her off, snarling like the wild beast he was whilst still cradling his dearest friend.

“Don't play games you stupid bitch! The truth! Or I'll tell him myself!” Derreck shouted. Echo swallowed hard and the smaller man looked to her.

“Tell me... tell me what? Echo, what is he talking about?” Evan asked innocently, still crying a bit. Echo bit her lip and gulped. At first she went to stay silent, hoping that Derreck was just bluffing. Derreck grumbled and went to speak.

“Fine! Fuck you. I'll tell him myself. She-” Echo cut him short.

“It was all a lie!” she cried out, catching Evan's immediate attention as tears started to build up in the mare's eyes. There was a silence before Echo too started to cry a little. “Evan I... I'm sorry. There was never a world ending device-” Derreck cut her short.

“Genetic virus,” he quipped and she tried to glare at him but he shot her down with a more fearsome glare, one that was gleaming with lust for death.

“It... it was a lie. He didn't have anything that threatened the world. I just... I...” she trailed off and began to cry.

“Don't try to pity yourself!” Derreck growled and Evan blinked in disbelief.

“Wha... what are you saying?” he asked but before Echo could answer with a heartfelt reply, Derreck cut in.

“She's trying to say she hired us to kill somepony clearly out of revenge. No satanic evil worshipers. No... kidnapped our best friend and is going to kill her lessen we give up a vial of... whatever. No... no nothing. Purely an assassination for personal issues.” Evan blinked in shock before looking to Echo.

“Evan, please it's not like that... I mean... well it is but...” she tried to speak through sorrowful sobs.

The man turned away from Echo, not wanting to hear another word. He instead hugged Derreck, crying into his chest as the big man began to rock him. “It's alright... sssh, it's alright, I'm here now. She can't hurt you anymore,” Derreck wooed him.

“I never meant to hurt him!” she screamed, standing upright in a defensive way as tears flowed down her cheeks. Derreck again drew Belladonna but this time Evan's hand resided atop the barrel and began to bring it down.

“Dont...” Evan whispered in such a soft tone that even Derreck was barely able to hear him.

“Give me one good reason I shouldn't tear this bitch limb from limb, ESPECIALLY after what she just did to you!” Derreck nearly roared, but kept his voice to a simmer in lieu of his close friend.

Evan swallowed and continued to pull the gun down. “Because... just because...” Evan whispered, tears still flowing from his eyes, dampening his eye patch. The big man cradled his friend, wooing him to sleep with the assurance that he'd watch over him.

Echo went to trot forwards but the big man held the handcannon towards her. “Not-one-more-step... you snaky... little cunt...” Derreck hissed and Echo's heart nearly sunk upon hearing those words.

“S-snake?” she whimpered and Derreck nose scrunched. “Y-you think I'm a... a snake?” Her voice trembled with emotion but Derreck could care less.

“Yeah... why? You have a better way of describing yourself? How else do you describe a slithery little cunt like yourself who shoots someone in the back?!” Derreck growled. Echo couldn't scream anymore. The will to fight back had been battered out of her for good. Instead she was filled with a guilty, sorrowful depression.

“I thought-” he cut her off quick.

“Well you thought wrong! Actually... you know what... from now on, stop thinking, because you're obviously not fucking good at it if you think shooting your friends in the back is helping!” Derreck roared while gently tucking Evan into a sleeping blanket and going to face Echo.

“I just... I-” she was again cut off by the fuming man.

“You what?! You lied to him! Pretended to be his friend so he'd open up to you mor-” she cut him short.

“NO! I... at first, yeah, I just pretended to like him. Truthfully I didn't want anything to do with you... either of you. I just wanted Liquid dead for what he did to me... but I... I fell in love-” Derreck cut her short.

“Oh how touching. 'You fell in love'... daww... SO YOU SHOT HIM IN THE BACK!” he roared right into her face, making her stagger back and stumble onto her haunches.

“I just...” she trailed off and Derreck growled, turning his back to her.

“You feel like shooting me in the back, Snake?” he snarled.

“I'M NOT A SNAKE!” she cried out and Derreck turned back to her.

“THEN WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU?! What kind of pony shoots their friend, someone they love, in the back?! He trusted you! And you fucking betrayed him, like the slithering little snake you are!” he roared, his words sinking in deep on Echo and putting her emotions to a maximum strain. Tears flowed out her eyes, her body stiff and tense.

Though it wasn't raining, dark clouds flooded the air above them, flashes of dark blue lightning flickering inside the clouds as thunder rumbled. Derreck scoffed. “You were more than just a friend to him...” Derreck mentioned in a somewhat calm tone, perking Echo's ears.

“I... I was?” she asked.

“Of course you were... he trusted you. Heart and soul he trusted you above all else, enough so that he disregarded Derpy's warnings about you... she's ever faithful to him you know. She'd never shoot him in the back like a snake,” Derreck taunted.

“Stop calling me a snake!” Echo lashed out.

“Well than maybe you shouldn't have shot Evan in the back like some traitorous cunt, SNAKE,” Derreck quipped. “Derpy was right... you couldn't be trusted... but even so, Evan disregarded her warning and entrusted you... letting you get close... that's the ultimate bond you know?” Derreck replied, perking Echo's ears once again.

“What is?” she asked.

“Trust. The ultimate bond of friendship. Without it there cannot be... you can't truly have honesty... caring... loyalty... you can't have anything if you don't truly trust someone. You can believe you do, but if you only believe than it's not really true, is it? And that man... the one you shot while he had his back to you... the one who trusted you to have his back... the one you lied to this entire time... he trusted you...” Derreck's feral appearance began to fade and a smile came across his face. “Snake.”

“I'm sorry, alright!” she cried out, tears flowing down her cheeks but Derreck just sneered.

“Trust... it's something so delicate yet so, so very powerful. The very basic foundation of friendship... of love... something you took for granted and now you think it can just be...” Derreck threw his hands in the air.

“Once trust is shattered... in much the same way you have severed yours with him... it is broken into a billion tiny shards and thrown into the winds... scattered across the lands... you broke his trust and now you'll just have to deal with that fact... Snake,” he growled, every time he called her Snake it hurt worse than the time before.

Swallowing hard, Echo tried to speak, but her voice was constantly interrupted by sobs of sorrow. “I... Liquid... he-” Derreck cut her short.

“I don't care what he did to you. I've read the reports. Scum of Equestria... but even so not really worth my time. I could be at home with my feet kicked up, not having to keep my friend safe from a backstabbing snake,” Derreck cursed her. It was the final straw as Echo collapsed to the ground in a sobbing mess, wishing she could take it all back.

She wished she had've told Evan the truth from the beginning. Wished she hadn't played him like a fiddle. Pretended to be his friend... and wished she had have never shot him in the back, even if it seemed like the right thing to do.

“I'm... I'm so sorry,” she whimpered, wishing she could crawl over and tell the man that, but the lumbering hulk between them was an impassible obstacle.

“Save it Snake... and know this. If you dare try and touch Evan, or shoot me in the back... I'll rip you in half with my bare fucking hands...”

Echo curled up on the cold, hard ground. She shivered to herself. Her face was damp from tears, her head hurt from all the crying... she felt a deep coldness within herself. Not one of temperature, but rather, one of guilt.

She held herself, trying to keep warm on the ground as she continued to whimper out tears. She had never felt so alone in her entire life...

* * *

The blindfold was taken off her face and she cringed for a moment, the light inside the laboratory a little bright compared to the darkness of the blindfold. Finally the disorientation passed and she was able to see properly.

“Voila!” Liquid presented her with a most cynical scene. In the middle of the room was a changeling, trapped inside a cage with its horn lopped off and wings cut short. Echo gasped.

“What... wha... I...” she stammered, the changeling huddled frightfully in the back of the cage.

“I know... wonderful isn't it?” Liquid replied but Echo quickly shook her head.

“No! That's terrible!” she nearly cried out and Liquid shot her a look.

“What?! No, Echo, think for a moment. Just... imagine the possibilities! If we could harness their power to feed off love... genetic coding for both magic and wings!” Liquid said, in an almost insane tone.

“H-how long have you... kept it like this?” Echo gasped and Liquid gave her an estranged look.

“Just a few months. My research is almost complete-” she cut him short.

“Liquid! That's terrible! You can't do this! Even to a changeling it's wrong-” Liquid cut her short.

“Slow down my love. Think about this. It could be a miraculous break through in medical science-” Liquid began.

“And take a massive leap back in civil rights?!” Echo gasped but Liquid seemed all to calm about the ordeal.

“Echo... I think you're overreacting-” she cut him short as she took a step back.

“Liquid... let it go,” she whispered to him and he again gave her a shocked look.

“You... you can't be serious!” he gasped and she nodded.

“As serious as I ever have been... Liquid... this is wrong on so many levels... you're keeping a living being captive against its will... not to mention having cut off its wings and horn... this is wrong on so many levels-” She was cut off as Liquid grabbed her, a little aggressively.

“Echo... you trust me, right?” He didn't get an immediate reply.

“Liquid... I love you... but this... this is too far. You... we, can not... do this,” she told him. “Let it go... or I will,” she warned and Liquid's lip twitched. Echo moved to break free of his grasp but Liquid's grip on her grew, his entire body tensing as he looked down to her.

“Echo... don't do this!” he warned. Time seemed to slow for her as she looked into her lover's eyes... then slowly to the tortured changeling that resided gloomily inside its cage. Finally her gaze returned to Liquid as time resumed. She felt her heart thumping in her chest and, for just an instant, she felt her heart skip as everything changed.

Her horn lit up in a bright glow, encasing Liquid's body in her magical aura and tossing him back against a far wall, slamming him into it with brutal force. He let out a howl of pain as Echo rushed to the cage in frantic panic.

“ECHO! DON'T YOU DARE!” Liquid screamed as he tried to find his balance, still disoriented from the blast. Echo fumbled with the cage's latch but resorted to instead using her magic to pry the cage's door open.

The changeling, looked to her with a most terrified look, petrified beyond belief about what horrible experiment might be next. “Run... go!” Echo cried to it. The changeling blinked, still terrified.

Echo grabbed the tortured creature with her magic and pulled it from the cage, setting it down on all fours before smacking it on the rump. “RUUUUUUUN!” she screamed, the creature not needing anymore incentive.

Liquid staggered to his hooves and looked with a most distraught glare, watching the love of his life release his greatest research project. “ECHO!” He roared as the changeling rushed for the door.

Just then, the door whizzed open and a rather unsuspecting mare entered, jotting notes down on a clipboard. The changeling came to a screeching halt as it was faced with the dilemma. The mare, her facial features twisted and scared, looked down to the changeling and attempted to grab it.

In a last ditch effort to free the changeling, Echo leapt into Belle, tackling her to the ground and clearing the way for the captive. The changeling took no time in rushing through the doorway, taking one last look back to its savior before rushing away to freedom.

Echo's breathing intensified, knowing full well what she had done. “You bitch!” Belle screamed, headbutting Echo and knocking her to her back. Liquid stormed over as Belle held her down, Echo squirming beneath her.

“You... you... how could you do that?!” Liquid yelled in frustration, months of research now thrown out the window.

Echo lashed back in retort. “How could YOU do that?!” she screamed, Liquid's face twisting into a snarly expression.

“I... you... you snake! You little snaky bitch!” Liquid snapped, his outburst hitting Echo hard as she winced.

Belle scoffed. “I told you we couldn't trust her!” she hissed at Liquid whom spat to the side, wiping a bit of blood from his lip.

“Irregardless...” his brow perked as he wandered over. “Hold her down... I'm going to claim what is rightfully mine!” he spoke in a deepening tone. Echo looked to him fearfully.

“Liquid! Wait... no, just think-” she was cut off as Belle slapped her across the cheek before promptly holding her face down into the floor, presented before Liquid whom licked his chops. Echo whimpered beneath the grasp Belle had on her, her back legs tight together with her tail wisped between them.

A look of great interest came across Liquid's face as her looked to her hidden nethers. Liquid stepped forwards in a show of dominance, using his magic to pry apart her legs. Echo let out a yelping cry as she tried to utilize her magic, but another headbutt from Belle cut her concentration short.

With her legs spread apart, Liquid pulled aside her tail. Echo whimpered out a plea that was cut off by a gasp as Liquid's tongue traced itself around her lower lips. Her back end attempted to clasp shut but Liquid's magic kept her rear end spread.

Another gasp came from her mouth as his tongue began to tease and taunt her, licking closer and closer to her slit with every passing moment. Her mind screamed out for her body to resist but even so her lower region began to resist the thoughts and give into the taunting pleasure.

Liquid pulled his face back from her flank and used his front hooves to spread her lips apart, getting a squeak from Echo. His expression turned to one of great accomplishment. “Oh please my love, don't try to deny it. You enjoy this. Your body tells the story in full truth,” he chuckled as he gazed to her now glistening pussy.

A presence bobbed between his legs, rock stiff and dribbling precum. A heavy musk flowed throughout the room, one that made Echo quiver. “Please... don't,” she whimpered, knowing full well what was coming.

Liquid climbed over top of his dominated mare, grasping her around the hip with his front hooves. Leaning down, he whispered a hiss into her ear. “Relax, my love...” he told her before biting the hide of her neck and gripping her hips tight as he pressed himself against her.

Echo whined beneath him, tears drizzling down her cheeks as she was held down against her will. Liquid shifted his hips a little and found his mark. He could feel her drooling wet pussy as he rubbed the length of his shaft against it, coating it in her juices.

Belle huffed in aggravation. “Why do you want her so badly?! She's just a stupid twat!” she scoffed in jealousy. Liquid ignored the other mare, focusing all his attention to the mare beneath him.

He pressed the tip of his cock to her entrance, a shudder of pleasure shaking his entire body and making his heart skip a beat. Echo's eyes clenched shut as she felt her lower lips begin to spread apart, his member beginning to invade her depths.

Biting her lips hard, she began to groan in mild pain as she was stretched, Liquid's thick cock slowly sliding into her velvety hole. A soft barrier obstructed Liquid's path for just a moment but was quickly broken as he shoved past it, emitting a scream of pain from Echo.

Liquid's brow perked as he drove himself balls deep, bottoming himself out against her cervix. Looking down, he saw a slight tinge of red dripping from her love hole and a look of lust came across his face.

He leaned into her a little, scrunching her body against the floor as he pinned her. He leaned down and gave Echo a kiss to her damp cheeks, whispering into her ear. “I'll make your first time one to remember,” he told her calmly, Echo whimpering out a whine of distress.

Liquid slowly pulled back, Echo's insides grasping at his cock as she was stretched to further accommodate his size. She groaned in pain but her lower region soon started to grow warm in pleasure, furthering her distress as her body began to enjoy her torture.

Liquid pulled all the way out, leaving the head of his cock pressed to her newly claimed pussy, dripping with slimy juice and just a slight tint of blood.

He pressed himself back inside of her, Echo gasping out a moan of pleasure against her will as she was violated. Liquid began to slowly thrust, Echo trying painfully to keep her mouth shut, biting her lips hard to try and keep her muffled moans to a minimum.

The feeling of pain had left her body and a warmth was starting to wash over her. She tried to force the pleasure away but it persisted past every mental barrier she could throw against it. Her insides began to constrict, tightening against the intrusive member.

She could feel the texture of his cock, sliding back and forth inside of her, slamming home with every thrust, forcing out involuntary moans of pleasure. Before she could even react, her body was flipped over, her back now to the ground. Liquid pressed himself against her, their bodies rubbing together in a way that would be intimate, had she not been forced against her will.

Liquid's hips pressed against hers as he continued his assault on her. Echo clenched her eyes shut as she felt her pending orgasm grow ever closer. She didn't want to indulge Liquid in such a triumph, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of pleasing her body in such a vile way.

Even so, Liquid could feel her body tensing up. He leaned down and began to slowly trail his tongue up her neck. Her body went rigid and she sucked in a deep inhale. Just as Liquid reached her face, he ground himself against her deepest depth, grinding the head of his cock against her cervix. His balls pressed against her puffy pussy lips, her pussy dripping with slimy juices.

Echo let out a shocked gasp of pleasure and Liquid sealed her lips with his own, pressing himself hard into her love tunnel as her body was shaken by a body numbing orgasm. The feeling of her inner muscles contracting against his shaft drove him over the edge and the duo fell into a simultaneous orgasm.

Liquid grunted fiercely as he himself endured the most powerful orgasm he had ever experienced. The head of his cock flared inside of the mare, a jet of cum erupting from the tip and blasting into her womb. Echo's body jolted from the feeling, tensing every time she felt another load of seed being dumped into her needy pussy.

Finally the duo came down from their orgasmic high. Finally finding her bearings, Echo went to lash out but was struck down by Belle whom remained vigilant the entire time. The mare was knocked into quick unconsciousness and left on the floor, a cum filled mess.

“So... what do we do with her now?” Belle asked and Liquid's lip twitched.

“I can still find some use for her body...”

* * *

Echo awoke with a gasp, springing herself free of the nightmare. Her body however, felt rather warm and cozy, despite the frigid air outside. Her heart rate began to slow as she realized she was safe, for the time being.

The rising sun in the distant horizon cast its gaze upon the cold world, making the hair along the back of Echo's neck prickle up as she laid on the cold ground. The gentle breeze outside blustered along the ground, its nippy and rather frosty temperature brushing past Echo's cheeks.

Taking note that her body was warm however, she looked to the covering that kept her warm. 'Evan's duster?' she thought to herself, wondering just how exactly she came into possession of the clothing if he and Derreck hated her...

She looked around but only for a moment as a shocking discovery hit her. There were bloodied bodies of ponies lying all around, several dozen feet away. She scrambled to her hooves in fright, some of the deceased corpses even being dismembered.

“Don't worry... they're dead,” spoke a dark voice. She looked over to the voice's owner and nearly gasped, her mouth gaping just ever so slightly. Standing dominant and strong, Derreck stood before several more bodies, a long draping black duster coat covering his body as he looked out to the distance, away from Echo and with his back turned to her.

His fists were still clenched, shiny blue metallic blades emerged from between his knuckles and still dripping with blood. Echo looked in a mix of fear and shock. All throughout the night she had never been disturbed in the slightest by the conflict that had went on in utter silence, and all the while he had stayed ever vigilant, despite being run down and exhausted.

The sun shone upon the big brutish man whom turned back to look at Echo. For a moment, she could swear his eyes were glowing hellish red, but discarded it as a probable distortion from the sun's gaze. His voice was crispy, dark, sinister but all the while true of cause. “Come on... we got a stallion to kill...”

Author's Note

The stallion sat on Derreck's lap, hushing out a sigh. "Mmm... look at you..." Liquid whispered as he trailed his hoof down Derreck's bare chest, gingerly caressing the man's scarred, yet muscular, exterior. "Such a... perfect physique... so beautiful..."

Derreck rose a brow as the stallion's hoof traveled lower and to his abdominal region. "Why... oh... how could she do this to you... drag you all across Equestria..." Liquid whispered, grinding his flank into Derreck's lap and holding the man close. The big man smirked faintly.

"Well... she's never tied me to a chair..." he quipped and Liquid sighed as he leaned back.

"Her loss..."

Chapter 68

'Best served cold...'

The shining slide of the handcannon was locked back, receiver open as the big man knelt atop the hill before the town, his black duster draping low and the flaps pulled slightly to the side as he fished out a magazine for the cannon.

Stuffing a mag into the gun, he then thumbed the slide release, the gun emitting a satisfying 'K-CHING!' as it snapped shut, loading a fresh magnum cartridge into the chamber. Depressing the hammer, he ejected the magazine and topped it up before giving it a shove back into the well of the pistol.

He turned to the mare, shooting her a rather cold glare as he holstered his cannon, concealing it with his duster afterwards. His glare nearly made Echo squirm in remorse, thanking goddess when his glare turned back towards the town.

“So...” he trailed off questioningly. She didn't dare look to him as she replied rather meekly.

“What?” she asked softly.

“Think you can blend in? These bastards will snuff you out like hounds otherwise. They're all murderers... killers... rapists... scum of Equestria. Think you can pull off the attitude and fit in? Cause if not, they'll kill you... or rape you... or kill you and then rape you,” The big man asked his question.

Echo took a deep breath and swallowed hard but the big man spoke before she could reply. “What exactly did he... do... to have you want him dead so badly?” the man asked, Echo clenching her eyes shut as she regretfully remembered the horrific memories.

“He... he forced himself on me... took my innocence-” she was cut off by a cynical chuckle from the big man.

“Innocence? Bwah-ha-ha-ha! What innocence? I saw the way you just... threw yourself on Evan,” he mocked her, much to her distress.

“I WAS!” She snapped back, quickly turning her head away. “He... we loved each other once... he taught me so much... and then...” she recalled the pained look on the changeling's face. “He had been... experimenting, I guess you'd call it... I released the changeling he had captured, tried to show mercy... he had me held down and claimed me but then...”

Echo turned to her side and lifted the cloak to reveal her belly, where a nasty jagged scar ran up her belly. “He took my... he left me barren... left me to die... I was in a coma for several years and the doctors said I should have never survived, let alone wake up-” Derreck cut her short as he spoke.

“But your lust for vengeance kept you alive,” he stated as he stuck a fat wad of a cigar in his mouth. Echo nodded in confirmation, concealing her rough, scarred underbelly once more. “Now... use that vengeance, let it surface... and fit in,” Derreck told her as he rose to his full height. “And nopony there will know the difference.”

Derreck tussled his duster slightly, buttoning it up at the front. Echo pulled the hood of her cloak over her head, concealing her facial features and letting her vengeful emotions surface to give her a steely cold vibe.

The two descended down towards the ramshackle town which was, by most sources, listed as a ghost town and without any doubt looked the part. However as the duo entered the town's limits, it was clear that the place was far from deserted.

The odd pony walked down the dusty trail that ran throughthe center of town. Ponies looked down from rattly old balconies at the two newcomers, some drawing out illegal crossbows in anticipation while others sat idly on porches.

A lone vagrant stumbled past them, burping grotesquely before looking to Echo. “Welsh... hullur durr purty littl-” the stallion was cut off by a burp, the stench of his breath traveling over to Echo, making her nose scrunch back.

“Beat it,” Echo warned but the stallion, too drunk to care, stumbled forwards.

“Aww... yer juss... hurtin' fer a squirtin'...” he trailed off and tried to wrap his foreleg around her. In a blitz Echo grabbed his leg and twisted it before promptly flipping him to his back and pinning him in a submissive hold, threatening to break his leg if she gave any more force.

The stallion screamed out in horrifying pain as he withered beneath her grip. Echo's face leaned lower, her facial features still concealed beneath the hood of her cloak, as she whispered into the stallion's ear. “I'll cut them off if you ever try to touch me again,” she hissed before releasing him.

In an instant the stallion was scrambling away, several of the town folk's attention drawn to them. Derreck looked around and took a sniff of the air. “Mmm... I could...” Echo's ears perked as she heard his words while he began to walk.

“Where are you going?!” she snapped at him, making sure to keep quiet enough so that nopony could overhear their conversation. Derreck however, gave no mind to keeping the conversation a secret.

“To get a drink. I'm thirsty,” he stated, walking over towards one of the nicer kept buildings. Echo was going to berate him for getting sidetracked but her lust for vengeance subsided slightly as she recalled her already bad standings with the man.

She kept her remarks to herself and followed the man to the tavern. Walking up to the door, she almost immediately felt a cold sensation run down her body. Not one from the temperature but more of a spiritual vibe.

Keeping her emotions hell bent on revenge, she at least looked the part of a petty criminal. The big man pushed his way into the tavern, knocking aside a pony that was too close to the door.

Inside there was heavy plumes of tobacco smoke, the smell of booze and sex. Derreck's nostrils twitched as he glared darkly across the tavern's interior. Most of the building's guests paid him no mind, instead being too busy getting loaded or trying to hire a prostitute.

He kept a plain expression as he slowly made his way over to the counter, Echo following not too far behind. Coming up to the bar counter, Derreck looked from side to side, seeing that most all of the spots were taken, save for one spare stool.

However, instead of taking the free stool, he walked up behind a lumbering stallion. Echo gulped to herself and shook her head. 'Oh goddess no... no, he isn't really... he is...' she thought in panic. The stallion looked like a steroid pumping slab of muscle that would crush other pony's heads in his biceps.

Derreck huffed at the stallion. “Out of my seat, dirt bag,” Derreck grumbled, the stallion's head perking up from hearing the insult. The lumbering beast slowly turned around and perked a brow, curious as to why the man would try to insult him while being somewhat smaller than he.

Derreck leaned in a bit closer. “I said move! Scumbag,” Derreck hissed. The stallion pumped his hoof into Derreck's gut with brutal force, Echo flinching. Opening her eyes however, she was stunned to see the blow hadn't even fazed the man, looking as though the stallion hadn't even hit him.

The stallion stood to his hindlegs, lumbering a good foot and a half above Derreck. The tavern went silent as the big brute roared out and bashed Derreck several times in the gut. Echo winced from the sight of the brutal beating that would no doubt kill a lesser pony. But even so, the blows barely even budged the man.

Huffing in aggravation, the stallion reared back for a wicked punch and threw a mighty haymaker. In a flash, Derreck grabbed hold of the stallion's forearm mid-strike, gripping tight on the inner side of his foreleg.

With immense impact, Derreck drove his forehead into the stallion's snout, knocking him to the floor. The man suddenly, and most instinctively, leaned back, in turn dodging a downwards strike from a baseball bat that had been swung from the bartender.

Derreck's left arm rose high then hammered down on the bartender's foreleg, crushing the bones beneath and making the pony scream out in agony before being silenced with a straight punch to the snout that knocked him out cold.

Echo watched in shock as the lumbering stallion stood back up, fuming as terrifyingly as ever. “Y-you... you broke my nose!” he boomed. Derreck looked to him, his fists tightening.

“I'm gonna break more than that!” he snarled back, hammering hard across the stallion's jaw with a brutal haymaker, the stallion's lower jaw busting out of place in a rather gruesome display.

Echo gasped as two stallions rushed the man from behind, pushing past her as they charged at the man with spears. Derreck turned to his left, grabbing the stallion's spear with his right hand and yanking on it, pulling the aggressor forwards and off balance while using his left to drive home a punch to the side of the pony's head. In the same instance, he yanked the unconscious body past himself and pivoted in a clockwise 180 degree motion, swinging a hard kick that caught the second attacker in the chest with the base of his boot and sent the stallion hurtling through a nearby table, the ponies sitting there getting up and scrambling or being knocked down with the tossed stallion.

Derreck took a seat where the brute had once resided, looking to the bar maid and tossing her a Celestia bit. “Vodka... straight... the premium stuff, not watered down...” he trailed off and looked around, ponies silently staring. “Keep the rest, for the ruckus... or maybe for yourself,” he said with a charming smile.

She nodded and quickly retrieved a single shot glass. “Two glasses, please...” he trailed off and looked to Echo, motioning with his head for her to come over. Echo slowly trotted over and Derreck looked to the stallion that still, boldly enough, sat silently beside him. “You're sitting in my friend's spot,” he growled.

Not even a heartbeat later the stallion was scrambling to get away, even to the point that he knocked over his whiskey whilst his hooves scurried against the wooden table of the bar counter.

Echo cautiously sat beside the seemingly unstable man as the maid gave the second glass. Echo leaned over. “What the hay do you think you're doing?!” she hissed, knowing full well he was gaining undue attention which would no doubt lead to their discovery.

He looked back to her. “Getting drunk... what are you going to do?” The bartender offered over a three liter bottle of vodka to which Derreck licked his lips and rubbed his hands together in anticipation.

Just before he could indulge himself however, a stallion poked him from behind. “Hey, dickbag... you can't just waltz in here like you own the place!” the stallion growled, being backed by two others. Derreck sighed and went as though he was going to calmly turn around, but instead lashed out, grabbing the stallion by the collar of his coat and yanking his body up onto the counter before shoving his right fist near his throat, two metallic blue blades erupting from between his knuckles, one on each side of the stallion's throat.

The stallion gasped beneath the man's grip, looking into the man's one good eye and into his steely cold glare. “I go wherever the fuck I want...” he said in a lumbering, deep tone. Very slowly, a third blade began to emerge from the middle, sliding down until it just touched the stallion's throat. “And I fuck wherever I go...” he trailed off and his blades promptly retracted before he heaved the stallion backwards and into the two others that recently had his back.

The blades emerged yet again and he dragged them against the counter. “YOU SEE THIS!” he roared to the entire tavern. “THIS... THIS IS MY MARK... MY SPOT! ANY MOTHERFUCKER WANTS IT ON THEIR FLANK AS A REPLACEMENT FOR THEIR CUTIE MARK, COME SEE ME NOW! OTHERWISE, FUCK RIGHT OFF AND LET ME DRINK!” The man's face was nearly shaking in intensity as he roared out his threat, one that, to Echo, seemed all too real and not in any way acted out.

“Well then... in that case, be warned... you get enough guts to disturb me while I'm drunk... and I'll fucking pull 'em out!” he warned before sighing and turning back to his glorious bottle of vodka and pouring both himself and Echo a drink.

The mare leaned over. “You keep this up... Liquid's gonna know we're here,” she whispered and the man chuckled.

“That's the plan,” he replied, much to her distress but he instead just patted her on the back. “Relax comrade. In due time... in due time. For now, just drink and be merry,” he stated, proposing a raise of the glass. Echo, rather reluctantly, clanged her glass against his, figuring it to be a stupid plan to say the least.

Pounding back the small shot, Echo gagged. “Blech! Gross... what is thi-” she was cut off as she turned to see Derreck chugging back the vodka straight from the bottle, sucking back gulps at a time.

After a few moments, he let out a rather distasteful belch that reeked of alcohol, the tavern going quiet as he did. Echo looked to the three liter bottle. In less than a minute he had nearly pounded back more than two and a half liters, which was, by most standards, essentially impossible and rather dangerous to do.

Derreck swirled the bottle then looked to her with a somewhat, but not entirely, intoxicated stare. “Want some?” he asked, offering her another shot. Deciding to try and copy his way of fitting in, she instead grabbed the entire bottle with her magic and took a rather hefty gulp. Setting the bottle aside, she nearly gagged from the backlash of aftertaste and burning feel of alcohol.

Derreck leaned back and perked a brow. “Damn... that stuff's pretty strong. Usually a few shots is enough to put a pony on their ass... not bad Snake,” he mused, Echo letting out a depressed sigh as she heard how he addressed her.

“Ahl...” Echo trailed off as wooziness started to hit her, along with slightly slurred speech. She instead decided not to speak.

“Ahem,” came a voice from behind Derreck, Echo turning to look but quickly whipping her head in the other direction, pretending as though she was sickly drunk. Derreck's face twisted into a snarly expression as the blades from between his knuckles erupted once more.

“I SAID I'LL KIL-” He cut himself short as he turned to be met by a rather battered mare. “Woah-ho-ho... hey-llo,” Derreck started again, in the best charming voice he had. The mare perked a brow, he scarred facial features twisting as she did so.

“Do you have any idea who I am?” she spoke to him in what could be considered a threatening tone.

Derreck shook his head before licking his lips. “Nooo... but I wanna get teh know yah... personally,” he said in a rather sexual tone of voice. The mare shot him a bland glare.

“I find that hard to believe,” she commented, Derreck in turn making a lewd gesture with his tongue.

“Than why don't you and me get a room... and I'll make you believe,” Derreck suggested, Echo perking a brow.

'Is he really trying to get with her?!' she thought to herself, just before the mare spoke.

“I... well that is to...” the mare blushed timidly before getting serious. “Well, I'm not sure how she would take it. Word is, you two came in together.” The mare pointed to Echo but Derreck just shook his head.

“Nah, she's just my partner... err, uhh... not, sexually. We're hitponies. Kinda. Just got back from down south. Killed some dragons that were trying to off the royal heir or some shit.” Derreck took another swig from his nearly depleted bottle of vodka.

The mare took a seat beside the big man. “Killing dragons?” she asked, almost impressed. Derreck nodded.

“Yeah... not easy, but the reward is well worth it...” Derreck commented, brandishing the bottle in an almost triumphant way. The mare smirked.

“Well... in any case... oh, how rude of me. My name is Belle.” She offered her hoof to shake which Derreck promptly took and planted a kiss on, making the mare blush further.

“Pleasure's mine Belle... mmm, such a fitting name,” he stated, Belle's cheeks flushing an even deeper red.

“Well... I... I'm flattered, Mr.-” she let Derreck finish.

“Black,” he informed her, to which she perked a brow. “Black is usually associated with death. I wanted 'Ace of Spades' but that was already taken... she's Mute,” Derreck pointed to Echo, and Belle took a look to the mare, whose facial features were still covered under her cloak's hood.

“Mute?” she asked to which Derreck nodded.

“She doesn't talk much, if at all... so I just call her Mute. We don't use our real names. Policy thing,” he informed her, to which she chuckled.

“So... dragon killers huh?” she asked but Derreck shook his head.

“Nah, just killers in general. As long as the pay is good. Dragons usually pay the most, seconded only by younglings,” Derreck commented, to which Belle nearly gasped, along with Echo.

“Y-you... you've k-killed foals?” she gasped to which Derreck shrugged.

“Well... no. No foals. Equestria doesn't usually... hire. Our profession is rather... shunned. Usually in places like the Griffon Kingdom, were say... a brother to the king is jilted because the king's son is going to be the next ruler, but the brother wants to be king next so he pays me to off the kid... and damn... it pays fuckin' good... mind my language.” Derreck offered Belle some of his vodka, to which she turned down politely. Smiling to himself, he pounded back the remainder of the bottle before letting out a mighty burp.

“Well... so I suppose that means you two have no... inhibitions when it comes to killing?” she asked but Derreck nodded.

“Well, yes actually, we do,” he stated to which Belle inquired.

“And that would be?...” she left the question open.

Derreck leaned forward with a toothy grin. “How deep the employer's pockets are.” Derreck leaned back and chuckled to himself. Belle perked a brow.

“How much to kill a mare hellbent on revenge?” she asked, Echo immediately gulping.

'Does she know?' Echo thought feverishly to herself, wondering if her presence had been made, and wondering to herself if Derreck would seriously consider killing her off. He had been acting strange this whole time.

Echo had thought, no word of a lie, that Derreck would never kill young ones, never kill just for money. She had believed him to be a punisher of evil, not a gun for hire. But this drunken talk had made the truth all too clear for her.

“Well... not much... depending. Why, whatsh... dammn,” Derreck purposefully slurred his speech. “Sorry I... Ish thought... didn't know I'd be hired again so shsshoon,” he laughed. Belle smiled back and waved the bar maid over.

“Another bottle please...” she looked to Derreck and gave him a wink. “This one's on the house.” Derreck perked a brow as the maid brought over another bottle of premium vodka.

“Dayum... an' ahm supposed tuh buy yoush a beer,” he slurred, to which Belle planted a kiss on his faked drunken lips. A rather lustful one at that.

“My boss may want to employ you for your... talents. He'll pay well and... if you satisfy, I'll even throw in a bonus,” she offered, to which Derreck nodded.

“Shshh-sure, yeah... I'll... I'm just gonna nap firsht,” Derreck informed her to which she waved over the maid again.

“A room please, a nice one,” she ordered the maid, but Derreck cut in.

“Two,” he ordered, to which Belle looked to him. “My friend needshsh a beds too. We don't... we're not that close,” he stated, to which Belle recalled him saying they weren't in that kind of partnership.

“Two rooms. The nicest ones we have,” Belle ordered, to which the maid grabbed a set of keys and slid them across the counter. “Here you go, Mr. Black. Enjoy your stay. And when you feel fit, come down to my boss's place. It's just down the street... you can't miss it,” she informed Derreck, who mused back.

“Will you be there?” he asked to which she smiled bashfully. “Then I definitely can't mish it.” Belle stifled a filly-ish giggle before standing.

“Well, I do look forward to seeing you again, Mr. Black.” With that she was off and Derreck slid a key over to Echo.

“Go on kid, we'll need our rest... ugh, and I need a bath,” Derreck said with a shudder, and in a now sober voice, as he stood up and casually wandered up the stairs of the tavern and to the second floor. Echo stood up, her legs wobbling a bit as she felt the alcohol really take effect on her body.

Doing her best not to stagger, she wandered up the stairs and to her room, indicated by the matching number that was on her key. Closing the door behind her and locking it, she let herself stagger, unbuckling the utility belt around her waist and shedding her cloak.

“Ugh... blugh...” Echo groaned, feeling horribly drunk. With a satisfying exhale, she flopped down on the bed, which smelled rather terrible but she could care less. The churning feeling inside her was set at ease as she found a soft spot on the bed.

Curling up contently with herself, she let go of all her problems, just letting herself relax. Just as she felt the overwhelming pleasure of sleep start to douse her however, the door swung open, making her jump up in fright.

The big man walked in, closing it behind himself. “GWAH! I locked it!” Echo yelped and Derreck shrugged, tossing aside a bent mane clip.

“And I unlocked it,” he stated as he began to shed his clothes.

“W-what... what are y-you doing?” Echo gasped, covering her body with the musty old blanket. Derreck didn't even look to her as he continued undressing.

“Taking a bath. My tub was filled with...” he trailed off, not daring to speak of the indecencies that resided in his bathroom as he entered her's, shutting the door behind himself. Echo held a hoof to her face as she sighed, groaning slightly as she rubbed the hoof down her face in a slow stroke.

She thought back on everything, all the moments of joy and happiness she had with the man... Evan. And how she let it all slip away. She let out a depressed sigh as she laid back down, a tear trickling from her eye. Time seemed to pass by at a rather quick pace, one she didn't take note of.

The door to the washroom opened back up, and with it, Evan stumbled out, brushing his still damp hair back and tightening the towel around his body that he had made into a toga. Echo sat up. “E-Evan?” she asked, a little baffled as to how the man was coming out of the washroom without having ever entered it.

The man didn't answer as he walked over to the couch, flipping over the dirty cushions then groaning as he realized the underside was nastier than the side that had previously been facing upwards. Flipping the cushions back over, he promptly flopped down with a relieved sigh. “Evan I'm... I'm sorry,” Echo apologized, seeing as how the overpowered brute of a man wasn't there to interject.

The man, in sorrowful depression, turned over and left his back to her. Echo stood up and stumbled over to his side, still drunk as ever. “Evan I just wanted to... I know it started off selfish, but I really did care for you,” she whimpered as she stroked a hoof down his shoulder, but he was unresponsive to her apology.

Rather cautiously, she rolled him over, to which he obliged, though reluctantly. Taking his hand, she began to run it down her chest. “What are you doing?” Evan replied in a low tone. She stopped his hand by her belly and rubbed it against a rather gruesome scar.

“Do you feel it?” she asked, Evan sitting up immediately and taking a better look. “This... is what 'he' did to me... it is proof that I was once going to be a mother. But when I...” she trailed off and held back a tear. “He took that away from me and left me barren. I can never again bear a foal. Never again will I have a chance to give birth... he stripped me of that gift and I just wanted him...” she trailed off again, not needing to continue. “I just wanted you to know.”

She stood up to all fours then reached one of her front hooves back to her belly, rubbing her hoof up and down the scar. “Sometimes I can still feel the pain... slithering up inside me... like a snake...” Echo put her hoof back down and wandered back over to the bed. "I've never told anybody that much about myself. Thank you, for at least listening."

Evan rolled over to his back, looking to the roof with his one eye. He thought back on how she had struck him down while he had his back to her... but then thought back on everything else they had done together.

How he and Derreck had first met her in the bar back in Manehatten... how he and Derreck had taught her so much about love and hate... how she had saved his life when he had a heart attack, and how he in return saved her life when Derreck attempted to strike her down, even if it was for shooting him in the back...

A sad tune seemed to play in the man's mind and he slowly stood up, a tear in his eye as he walked over to the now dozing mare. The room had a slight draft to it and was a little cold. Echo shivered slightly as she huddled up in more of a fetal position. Evan pulled up his old, worn out duster coat and tucked her in with it, Echo immediately relaxing into a warming look.

The man walked over to the nearby window and looked out to the streets below, placing the fat wad of a cigar between his lips as he let out a sigh. In his imagination, a flash of blue light, much like that of lightning, seemed to glimmer outside, reflecting his face in the window.

He looked to the reflection, all bloodied and battered, with a piece of slag sticking out of his forehead. Evan sighed to himself as he closed his eye, stroking his hand across his still smooth skin...

* * *

Hours passed and Echo slowly came to, her intoxication having passed in her sleep and her body feeling cozy warm. She slowly rose from her slumber and took note it was Evan's duster that had once again kept her warm.

She hopped out of bed and looked around the dimly lit room. Looking to the window, she realized she must have slept most of the day away as it was now getting into the night. Looking to the couch, she spotted the smaller man dozing away, though curled up...

She trotted over and gently covered him with his duster coat, much in the same caring way he had done to her. Leaning down, she kissed him on the cheek, whispering to him even if he wouldn't hear her. “Thank you.”

Echo stepped back and watched the man take a more relaxed pose as he slept. She smiled to herself before exhaling. The air in the tavern, even inside their rooms, smelt rather rancid and horrible. The stench of tobacco had settled into everything, along with the musk of sex and wafting scent of spilled booze.

Echo shook her head and decided to go out for some fresh air, figuring that her identity hadn't been blown, and that nopony would second guess her if they saw her like this. Even Belle believed her to be a ruthless killer for now...

Echo slowly trotted down the stairs of the tavern and out the front doors, walking out onto the dirt road that traveled through the would be ghost town. Pulling back the hood on her cloak, she took in a refreshing inhale, letting the cold air calm her body...

Across the street, in the second story of a nicer building, a slime green pony sat tapping his hooves together as Belle stood before him. “Are you sure about these two?” Liquid asked curiously, Belle nodding.

The duo had been discussing the matter all day. Liquid leaned back in his chair with a deep exhale. “Echo and her friend killed The Face of Death... just because they can kill dragons-” Belle cut him short.

“Trust me... this... hairless ape... I know he's good. His partner doesn't talk much but I can't imagine she's a slouch if she's riding with him. They can take care of Echo and her... White Skull,” Belle assured her friend.

Liquid tapped his hooves together again as he thought to himself. “Indeed...” he swung around to the window in his swivel chair and looked out to the town below. As he looked to the streets, he spotted a most particular mare. His eyes went wide as he stood up to his hindlegs, fore hooves against the window. “SON OF A BITCH!” He yelled, making Belle nearly jump.

“What?!” she gasped, running to his side. Liquid pointed down to the mare whom soon after pulled the cloak hood back over her head and wandered back into the bar.

“Looks like you've been had... hahahaha... dragon killers,” Liquid mused before rubbing his chin. “Surround them, but I want them alive. Bring Echo to my quarters but the... White Skull... I want to speak with him personally. I may just find use for him,” Liquid ordered, Belle nodding, infuriated that she had been tricked by a smooth talking assassin...

Echo made her way back up to her room, wandering through the door. However, no sooner had she, was pulled into the room, door slamming shut behind her and being pinned to the ground. She gasped and went to scream but a hand went over her mouth just as a suppressor was pressed against her forehead. Derreck gasped. “Snake?! Where the hell did you go?!” he hissed, taking his hand away from her mouth.

Gasping for air, she spoke frantically. “For some fresh air! What the hay do you think you're doing!” Echo snapped at him. He stood up from atop of her, flicking the safety on his H&K MK 23 SOCOM pistol.

“Watching guard... were you followed?” he asked and she immediately shook her head. Derreck quickly peeked out the door to make certain before once again closing it but this time locking it as well.

“What's got you so jumpy all of a sudden, Mr. Foal Killer,” Echo scoffed and Derreck shrugged.

“Bad vibes I guess... and I've never, in my entire life, killed younglings,” Derreck retorted, Echo raising a brow.

“That's not what you told Belle,” she countered and Derreck just laughed, patting her on the head.

“Remember what I said about fitting in. About playing the part?” Derreck reminded her.

“You play the part a little too well. It didn't seem like you were acting,” she told him to which he smiled.

“That's the whole point isn't it? Acting is making a lie so believable, others see it as the truth,” he stated and Echo perked a brow.

“So how do I know you're not just acting right now? How do I know you're not really a foal killer?” she inquired, Derreck in turn pulling aside the flaps on his duster and revealing the white skull T-shirt.

“Because all those rumors you hear... the ones about me punishing evil doers... they're true,” Derreck replied before standing up. “And because of my acting, we now have a rather private audience with the stallion himself... we go in there clean and straight... and then...” Derreck twirled the H&K pistol on his index finger before snapping it into a tight grip.

“Pop-pop-pop... nopony hears the shots and we leave like we're off to kill you... and we get out clean and serene...” Derreck looked to Echo who was baffled by his plan which seemed rather thought out.

“H-hey... that's pretty... pretty good-” Derreck held his finger to his mouth, signaling her to be quiet. “What?” she asked, Derreck making a motion for her to be silent and listen. Echo's ear flapped slightly as she listened close, but didn't hear anything. “I... I don't hear anything,” she stated and Derreck nodded.

“Exactly... it was bustling downstairs just a second ago... and now it's quiet as a mouse.” Derreck ushered Echo behind himself. “Evan... get up... we got trouble,” Derreck called to his friend.

The second man rose up from the couch in a hurry, as though he hadn't actually been sleeping. Evan slipped on his brown duster coat before drawing out his mighty handcannon, meanwhile Derreck held his inline with the doorway.

Time seemed to stand still. Not a single noise could be heard, not a single thing in the room moving. Derreck's nostril twitched and his grip on the .45 handgun tightened.

From outside the door there was a creak in the floorboards and Derreck fired off a trio of shots, a scream on the opposite side echoing out. The door then burst open, a group of thugs trying to all force their way into the room at the same time in a non-communicative way.

Due to their lack of strategy the group ended up getting tangled together, allowing Derreck several fatal pot shots. Gunshots boomed inside the room, illuminating the area and letting flashes of light out the window for all to see and hear.

Evan pitched in, his cannon knocking a stallion back into two others and tumbling the group out the door and over the railing, crashing down to the bar below. Several more shots erupted before the two windows of the room were smashed, Derreck taking no mind and keeping his focus to the ponies invading through the doors.

Suddenly the slide to his handgun locked back, signaling it was dry. With no time to reload, he countered a bladed swing from a thug and reversed the strike into another before snapping the first's neck.

Just before he could really get onto the offensive, Evan called out. “DERRECK!” he yelled, getting the man's attention. He turned back to see Echo being held in a grapple, her own knife to her throat and Evan just barely holding two pegasi at bay with his empty handcannon, holding it steady but knowing it's ammunition had been depleted.

Derreck swallowed, thinking hard before raising his hands in surrender. “Derreck... what... are you doing?!” Echo grunted, the man slowly setting down his piece.

“There'll be another time...”

The trio's weaponry were confiscated and they were escorted out of the tavern and towards Liquid's residence. As they were walked across the street, Derreck looked to Belle. “You never mentioned this... oh, how I do love surprises,” he joked, Belle's lips turning into a snarly expression.

As they were pushed through the doorway, the group was separated, Derreck being led down the hallway and to a separate, rather plain, room with two chairs inside. Being rather forcefully sat down, he was quickly tied to the chair to which he perked a brow.

“You guys... seriously think this can hold me down?” he asked but went silent as a green stallion in fine attire entered the room.

“Ahhh, Mr. Black... or is it White Skull?” he asked, Derreck groaning.

“I was going for 'The Punisher'... but they started calling me that from the skull on my shirt... my real name is Parker,” Derreck stated, to which the stallion nodded.

“Oh... so shall I call you Punisher, or Parker?” he asked calmly, Derreck wiggling his hands, bound at the wrists.

“Well... judging by this situation's circumstances... you can call me Suzanne if makes yah happy,” he joked, the stallion walking over and taking Derreck's bound hand, shaking it.

“Liquid. Liquid Emerald. Pleasure's mine Mr. Parker,” Liquid stated with a hearty smile before spinning the second chair around and sitting in an inverted way, face to face with Derreck. “So... she's dragged you all the way across Equestria just to kill me... I'm flattered,” he mused, the man silent for the time being.

Liquid clucked his tongue before sighing. “So how is it... that she... conspired, to persuade you... to kill me? Was it the promise of sex?” he asked to which Derreck sneered.

“I don't fuck snakes,” he commented back, perking Liquid's ears.

“Snakes?” he asked curiously, Derreck nodding.

“She shot my friend in the back... he trusted her and she just... bang,” Derreck informed the stallion who perked a brow.

“Well... you'd never believe me, but I'll tell you anyway. I once trusted her, loved her even... and she did much the same thing to me. Ruined my life and my research... coincidence the same snake brings us together, hmm?” he asked and Derreck shrugged. “So... if not the promise of eventual sex, what did she offer you?” Liquid inquired, the big man speaking in a monotone voice.

“Money,” he stated blankly, Liquid raising a brow.

“You're... a hired killer than? Perhaps you didn't fully lie to Belle,” he replied and Derreck just rolled his eyes.

“Not quite... I don't kill innocent. Only evil doers. I hunt down the guilty that walk freely among the innocent,” Derreck informed.

“But only for money?” Liquid asked, Derreck shaking his head.

“No... but I don't usually busy myself with traversing across Equestria just to kill a petty rapist,” Derreck stated, Liquid's expression changing.

“Oh... is that what she said?” he asked, Derreck nodding in reply. “Oh... tsk, tsk, tsk...” Liquid stood up and trotted right in front of Derreck. “Do you truly believe I raped her? Or perhaps she just wants me dead for something more? A bigger picture?” he asked, Derreck shrugging carelessly.

Liquid sat on Derreck's lap, straddling him and placing his fore hooves on his shoulders. “Look into my eyes... see my soul... and ask yourself if I'm just a petty rapist,” Liquid suggested, Derreck looking to him with a bland expression.

Liquid exhaled and stroked Derreck's cheek. “And look at you... poor soul... I can see it all... dragged through endless battle... tormented by something much greater than anypony can see... and look what this mare does to you... drags your body across Equestria like some kind of mule... she has been very bad, no?” Liquid said, not really a question.

Derreck still stayed silent and Liquid's hooves moved to Derreck's battle suit zipper. Slowly, and rather sensually, Liquid unzipped the battle suit halfway down, revealing the man's scarred chest.

Liquid let out an almost aroused exhale as he stroked his hoof across Derreck's chest, the big man perking a brow and Evan's conscious voice speaking up. 'Woah-woah-woah-HEY! No-no-no-no-NO! WAIT! Hold on, this is gay, like actually GAY! DERRECK STOP!' Evan's voice lashed out, the big man not paying attention.

“Mmm... see what she's done to you?” Liquid asked as he stroked a hoof down Derreck cheek, wrapping his other hoof around Derreck's neck.

Derreck rose a brow as Evan's voice continued to scream out for Derreck to stop. 'Derreck... what's gotten into you?!'

Derreck met Liquid's eyes with his own as he smirked. “Well... she's never tied me to a chair and sat on my lap...” he joked, much to Liquid's cut in.

“Her loss,” he said as he further unzipped Derreck's suit. A smile drew across the man's lips.

“Are you sure this is still about Echo?” he asked, Liquid's gaze traversing across the man's battered body.

“Well... less so... it's about you... and me...” he looked to the guards and nodded for them to leave. Derreck's brow rose, as did his smile and the internal voice of Evan as he screamed out for it to stop.

Liquid's hoof slowly, and most sensually, began to slid down Derreck's cheek, down his neck and to his chest. “Oh... how your mind must be scrambling... heart racing...” Liquid leaned in closer, whispering into Derreck's ear.

Liquid's flanks rode against Derreck's lap as he began to grind against the man's groin. “But there's always a first time for everything, yes?”

Derreck's expression changed just ever so slightly. “What makes you think this is my first time?” he suggested to which Liquid leaned in and began to suckle on the man's neck, Derreck emitting a groan.

Taking it as a message to continue, Liquid began to lick and kiss up the man's neck until he reached his chin, Derreck leaning his head back with a gasp. Liquid tilted his own head back with a grin of growing satisfaction but was taken by complete surprise when Derreck butted his head forward and smoked his forehead against Liquid's muzzle, the force enough to knock Liquid off Derreck's lap and be sent tumbling into his chair.

Liquid screamed in agony as he cradled his busted nose, Derreck musing to Evan through thought. 'I planned this out. Don't worry, I wouldn't seriously indulge in a stallion rapist...' much to Evan's relief.

Derreck looked to Liquid as he screamed out for help. “I don't like stallions,” he quipped just as a bulky thug rushed in and backhanded Derreck's body to the floor. The big man crashed and tumbled painfully, still strapped to the chair.

Liquid looked to him with a fiery glare, holding his bloody muzzle. “Ta... take him to Belle... le-let her... do what she wants with him!” Liquid yelped out, still in pain before rushing off. The big stallion booted Derreck in the ribs, sending him crashing into a wall but laughing all the while, even while blood came spewing from his mouth in a wheeze for breath...

Liquid pulled out a bag of frozen peas, gently placing them over his tender muzzle. Using his magic, the stallion slowly walked over to his private chambers, opening the door and looking triumphantly to his prize that lay tied down to the bed.

Liquid came and sat beside the mare, who gave a muffled yelp, her mouth bound with a cloth. Very tenderly, Liquid removed the mouth gag, immediately getting an earful from the still bound mare. “Hush now, or I'll stuff it with a dirty sock,” Liquid threatened calmly, Echo begrudgingly going silent.

Liquid took a deep inhale before readjusting the bag of frozen peas, Echo snickering. “How do you like my friend?” she quipped, Liquid sighing with a roll of the eyes.

“He's a... an interesting fellow...” he trailed off and looked to her with a risen brow. “Why haven't you tied him to a chair yet?” he asked in a suggestive tone, Echo spitting to the side.

“Because I'm not some sick perverted rapist like you,” she shot, Liquid sighing, almost in a defeated way.

“Is that how you view me? Don't you remember all those times we shared? All the things I taught you? Those nights beneath the stars in the meadows?...” Liquid asked, making Echo painfully remember all the good times...

In the basement of the building, Derreck was strung up with chains, the snapping echo of a whip clearing audible for all nearby to hear. Derreck held back his grunts of pain as the gruesome mare lashed the whip several more times across his bare back.

Blood dripped down his brutalized skin, dampening his underwear, his battle suit having been stripped before the torture began. Belle huffed in slight exhaustion as she let loose with everything she had, lashing him several times with excruciatingly painful strikes of the whip.

She began panting, gasping just slightly as she caught her breath, Derreck groaning just slightly, and under his breath. Belle trotted around to his front side and looked to the man as he dipped his head, spitting some cherry red blood to the floor. “Interesting...” Belle commented, not perking the man's attention.

She lifted his chin up with her hoof and smirked. “You know... most stallions are begging me at this point...” she informed him. “Not many go this long without at least screaming... I'm not that charming, you know,” she incurred, Derreck snickering.

“Really? I would've never guessed,” he joked getting a stab to the gut from a small pointy object that made him wheeze and gasp for air in a painful way. The man looked down to see a pin jabbed just beneath his rib cage, right into his Solar Plexus.

“It's true, I'm not much of a visual charmer... but...” she took out another fine pin and began to drive it into his bicep. Derreck's lips parted as he gasped quietly, quietly groaned as Belle slowly drove it all the way through his bicep, the bloodied tip finally poking out the opposite side.

“... GWAHHH! Ughaahhh!” Derreck held his breath for as long as possible before wheezing for air, the pin in his Solar Plexus making it extremely difficult to even breath.

“I am very proficient at missing vital areas... and making stallions scream my name...” she said in a cynical way. “Nopony has ever made it past four...” she told him as she pulled out a little pouch and unraveled it, revealing a large selection of pins and needles. “I have forty... and I can do this all night,” she told him as she began to drive one through the right side of his neck...

Upstairs in Liquid's room, the stallion rubbed his hoof up and down Echo's inner thigh, much to her discomfort. “You know... I've always wondered...” the stallion spoke in a gentle tone, Echo snapping back in an irritated one.

“Wondered what?!” she scoffed just before yelping as a syringe was jabbed into her thigh. She let out a scream as Liquid injected her with a light green fluid. “WHAT THE HAY IS THAT?!” she screamed, the stallion not answering immediately as he finished with the injection and tossed the needle away.

“Don't worry, I'll explain after... but while I wait for it to take effect, I want to tell you a little story,” he told her as he stood up and walked over to the nearby counter and grabbed himself a shot glass.

He used his magic to levitate over a bottle of wine, pouring himself a generous amount before turning to his unwilling guest. “Would you care for a glass?” he asked, Echo shooting him a glare. “Fine, so be it,” he replied as he took a small sip and promptly returned to her side.

“You know of course... the tale of The Mare in The Moon?” he asked, Echo not answering. “Yes well... as the story goes...” Liquid stopped for just a moment to take another sip. “Well, Celestia brought upon light and the sun's warmth to the world, bringing about life and love... her elegance... her beauty... grew so great, that it cast a shadow upon her beloved little sister, said shadow only growing darker as the days and nights past by...”

Liquid twirled his glass in circles and took another sip. Echo took a deep, heavy breath, beginning to pant slightly with a little bit of sweat forming above her brow as Liquid told the story. “And you see, when Celestia finally took notice that others had not been cherishing Luna's gift to the world, she realized... in that moment, she herself... had not been loving Luna to all that she deserved... and it was all she could do but watch as Luna's unhappiness grew.” Liquid finished his glass of wine and set it aside.

“And so it was... that Luna's transformation was partly in due on Celestia... whom in the end banished her once beloved sister to the moon...” Liquid leaned back and rested his front hooves on his lap.

Echo felt a flush of arousal strike her, though she hadn't the least bit of knowledge why. Liquid looked to her and perked a brow as he spoke. “Ahh yes... I suppose you're wondering about that serum I gave you. Truth drug, but of my own concoction. It's far more powerful than anything the authorities would give you but it... uhh... has a slight... side effect. You see... it gives you a rush of euphoria, much like an aphrodisiac... do you feel it?” he asked knowing.

Echo grunted and whined. “Aphro... aphrodisiac?” she asked and Liquid nodded. “Nnn...nghahh...” was all Echo could manage, not wanting to indulge the stallion. Liquid stood up and looked out the window to the moon above.

“Oh yes! Of course, you're right. Back to the story... you see, only after Celestia banished her sister to the moon did she realize how painfully taken for granted she had treated her sister and... for over millennium she walked Equestria alone and sorrowful,” Liquid told her, Echo glaring at him.

“What are you getting at?” she snarled through her teeth and the stallion sighed.

“Much like Celestia... only after I... did what I did, did I realize how much I missed you and how wrong I had been,” he stated honestly.

“So now the point comes it,” she snapped and he huffed.

“Listen kiddo... we were both in the wrong-” she cut him short.

“I RELEASED A CHANGELING YOU WERE TORTURING! I WAS BEING MERCIFUL!” She screamed, Liquid stifling a laugh.

“It never pays to be merciful... do you love the man downstairs?” he asked, Echo going silent but the truth serum quickly kicking in.

“Nnnn... not at first but... I fell in love with him... but now... I was just trying to help,” she whined, Liquid nodding.

“And it seems that whenever you think you're helping... it always goes the wrong way, no?” he stated, much to Echo's dismay. Liquid took a deep breath before letting it out in one go. “I'll be straight with you kid... back then at the lab, I... I overreacted,” he said, Echo's expression turning to great anger.

“Y-you... overreacted?!” she screamed. “That's your excuse?” Liquid held up a hoof.

“I said I'd be straight with you, not that I'd explain myself... much like Celestia neglecting her sister and then banishing her... my actions were not justifiable, and I have had to live with the consequences since-” Echo cut him short.

“WHAT CONSQUENCES?! I'M THE ONE LEFT UNABLE TO BEAR FOALS!” She screamed, Liquid patting her on the thigh, her nethers damp with arousal due solely to the potent drug.

“Trust me love... I've been as tormented as you...”

Back in the basement Derreck groaned loudly as a pin was forced beneath his collarbone and out the other side. His jaw lay slack as he tried to wheeze for oxygen. His body had been forced to the absolute limit, pins jabbed into nearly every pressure point or sensitive area save for his genital region.

Belle rubbed her chin as she looked to the man, whom reminded her of a porcupine with all the pins sticking out of his body. Belle patted the man's side, making him stifle a grunt. “I do say... quite impressive indeed. Never in my life have I met somepony as resilient as yourself but I know that every stallion has his limits...”

She grabbed a grisly looking, old rusty knife off the counter before standing to her hindlegs and leaning towards the man. “I always make stallions scream my name...” she told him in an aroused tone as she began to bring the tip of the knife towards Derreck's good eye.

The man began to lean back but was held from going any further by the chains shackled around his wrists. The mare continued to bring the knife ever closer to his eye. However, just as she drew dangerously close, Derreck drove his right elbow across her chin, spinning her around.

With a hefty kick between the legs, he lifted her body off the ground, supporting her by the crotch with his foot as he tied the binding chains around her neck then yanked. There was a small audible 'CRCCK!' that echoed in the room just as her body went limp.

Dropping her body, Derreck pulled tight on the chains and gave them a heave. The plate connecting the chain to the wall wiggled slightly, the concrete around the bolted plate cracking slightly. Derreck gave another powerful heave and the plate burst free from the wall.

As quickly as he could manage, Derreck pulled free all the torture pins before patting down the dead mare and retrieving the keys for his shackles. “Sorry to break yer record,” he quipped before making for the room's door...

Liquid rubbed his face with a sigh. “You know kiddo... it took me a long time to accept it but... in the end I wasn't mad at you for what happened... I was mad at myself,” he said, Echo looking away.

Liquid leaned down, using his hoof to pull her face to face with him. “Echo... do you still... somewhere deep down... have any semblance of love for me?” he asked. Echo bit her lip hard, not knowing the answer. Leaning his face down, he went to kiss her, but a massive explosion outside shook him back to all fours.

He raced to the window just as an eruption of gunshots went off, screaming echoing from the street soon after. “That'll be my friend... he's coming for you,” Echo stated surely, Liquid gulping deep as he watched the big man rush out onto the street with his H&K pistol drawn, black duster coat fluttering as the man performed daring acrobatics.

The man would spin, jump and roll out of the way of crossbow shots, all the while returning fire with his .45 caliber handgun. As Liquid watched for less than a minute it became all too clear. The legends were true...

That thing... that man, was The Punisher... he who punished the guilty and freed the innocent from their oppression. Liquid's spine shivered as he spotted the white skull, fully brandished, on the chest of the man's otherwise black shirt.

Liquid didn't even look back to Echo as he rushed out of the room. The mare, finally able to partially think straight, went to work on freeing herself from the ties around her wrists and ankles, jolting every time there was an explosion.

At one point she thought the world was ending as she heard somepony saying something along the lines of kam-ah-has, followed by a ground shaking tremor force. Finally freeing herself, she wiped her horn clean of the magic subduing goo and grabbed her utility belt.

Making for the door, she whipped it open even before she had her utility belt properly buckled on. A big brutish thug stood guard, whom immediately spun around as the door was yanked open. Echo gasped as the thug looked down upon her, quickly going to grab her.

Echo's horn lit up and blasted him with a powerful surge of energy that sent him tumbling over the rail and to the floor below. Looking over the railing, she spotted the stallion's body. Echo figured to herself he must have landed head first, as he wasn't moving and looked to have a broken neck from the fall...

Evan leapt behind a crate as Derreck slid behind a nearby pile of filled burlap sacs. Arrows and crossbow bolts stabbed into their cover and the duo quickly returned fire on the enclosing hoard of thugs and gang members.

Belladonna's slide locked back and Evan swore. “Almost out of ammo!” he yelled to Derreck just as the bigger man was feeding a fresh magazine to his own gun.

“I know the feeling!” Derreck yelled back over all the commotion before pulling out a magazine for Belladonna and passing it to Evan. “Last one. Make em-” he was cut off as Evan quickly slapped the loaded mag into his gun, thumbed the release and fired several times towards Derreck.

The big man flinched but then realized Evan had blown away a stallion that had gotten behind him. “Nice shootin' Tex!” Derreck quipped before thumbing the release on his own gun and spitting out death towards those foolish enough to charge them head on.

Even with their superior weaponry, the two were helplessly out manned, outgunned and quickly running out of ammo. “FUCK ALL OF YOU! FUUUUUUCK YOU!” Derreck roared just as a red stick of dynamite landed by their feet. Evan and Derreck both mad a dash for it, ponies across the street trying to get off pot shots with their crossbows while the two were in the open.

“FUUUU-” Derreck yelled just as the dynamite stick went off, hurtling the two through the side door of the neighboring building. Blood dripped down Evan's forehead, his pure white monk-ish uniform now tattered and stained with blood.

There was yelling outside as the gangs of the town surrounded the building, yelling out and forming a plan. Before Evan could even get to his knees, several flaming bottles were tossed into the building. As they shattered, the fire spread at an alarming rate. Derreck yelled out in frustration as the building caught ablaze. He fired off several rounds before his gun ran dry. “SON OF A BITCH!” he swore.

A lone stallion rushed to the building and hucked a flaming bottle at Derreck, which shattered against his body and lit him aflame. Evan took aim on the culprit and fired a perfect double tap on the stallion's chest. The perp was tossed back from the immense force as Evan turned to his smoldering friend who was rolling on the now smoking wood floor.

“Derreck!” Evan yelled as he looked to Belladonna, realizing she was empty. “I'm out! Whatta we do?!” he yelled, the other man staggering to his feet. The street was crawling with scum, armed to the teeth and looking for blood.

He closed his eye as he spoke. “The only thing we can do...” he spoke before tapping the device plugged into his right ear. A holoscreen popped up in front of his good eye as a little mouthpiece sprang out as well. “JUGGERNAUT!”...

Off in the distance, atop a lone hill overlooking the town, a set of headlights lit up in the night, piercing the darkness. The tuned diesel engine roared, a fume of black soot spewing out the large bore exhaust as the truck rumbled to life. Gearing into autopilot, the truck raced towards the town, towards its master...

Echo snuck through the darkness of the alleys between the buildings, doing her best not to be seen and using the night's darkness as her ally. There was now an impossible abundance of thugs crawling all over the town, all herding towards a burning building.

As Echo crouched down, she squinted her eyes to take a better look before gasping. “Evan!” She quickly covered her muzzle, realizing she had spoken aloud, though luckily all the gang members were out of ear distance and focused mainly on burning the men alive or waiting until they tried to escape to shoot them down in the street.

Before she even had time to begin thinking of a plan, a blundering heap of armored metal came crashing through the building beside her, going in through back and coming smashing out the front. Juggernaut took debris and interior with it as the vehicle cranked itself into a fishtail, side swiping the burning building...

The building's front wall was torn down by the lumbering battle truck, the back end now facing the two men as the back door swung open. Evan heaved Derreck's arm over his shoulder and the two staggered into the truck, Evan pushing Derreck in first before himself hopping in.

Derreck banged on the interior hull. “Juggernaut! Floor it!” he roared, the truck going into maximum overdrive as it sped away. A sense of urgency came over Evan as he spoke up.

“No, wait! Echo!” he yelled, somehow sensing her presence nearby and knowing they couldn't leave her behind. Just as they past the building Juggernaut had driven right through, Evan pointed out. “Right there! Hold up! BACKUP, BACKUP, BACKUP!” He yelled out, the battle truck acknowledging him and cranking into reverse.

Echo nearly gasped as she fell to her haunches while the lumbering armored truck came to a screeching halt before her, back door still open as Evan reached his hand out. “Come wit me if you want to live,” he said in an almost instinctive way, his mind not having told himself to speak in the accent.

'YES! Perfected performance!' Evan thought silently as he held out his hand. Derreck leaned over Evan's shoulder and yelled out to the mare. “You wanna live or what?! COME ON!” He yelled, jolting Echo and having her mindlessly grab Evan's hand who in turn pulled her into the vehicle's rear cabin.

Evan turned to Derreck just as Juggernaut began to squeal away yet again, arrows pinging harmlessly off the armored shell of the truck. “SO WHAT NOW?!” Evan yelled over all the commotion.

Derreck only took a moment to think before his answer came out. “The alien ship gun!” he stated, Echo perking a brow. Derreck hauled out a rather large machinegun, quickly mounting it with the barrel facing out the back door.

Evan fumbled with the large cartridge shells, all being bound together in a linked belt. Derreck flipped open the top on the receiver and looked to Evan who got ready to feed the big fifty.

Just as the smaller man went to feed the cartridge belt to the mounted machinegun, a lucky arrow caught him in the shoulder, dropping him to his back as he yelped out in pain. Derreck threw his body over him as more arrows pinged off the backside of the truck.

“Shit... stay down!... Snake!” Derreck called to Echo, whom felt deflated from hearing him call her such. “Grab the ammo belt!” he ordered, Echo quickly doing as she was told. “Don't hold it with your magic though, it can't have too much resistance,” he yelled to her over the sound of the roaring engine.

Echo took hold of the hefty belt of ammunition, Derreck feeding the first round into the gun and shutting the receiver top before promptly racking the charging handle. “Evan, can you drive?” he asked the smaller man, whom yanked free the arrow in his shoulder and nodded, taking the driver seat.

Time seemed to slow for Echo as her mind began to play tricks on her. The smaller man's body seemed to fade out, much like that of a ghostly image, the truck's 'Auto pilot' indication flickering on and off as the man began to drive.

Looking back to the bigger man, he seemed to change vividly. The scarred, battered man she knew as Derreck, and then shading into a form much like the other man, Evan. But his second form was brutalized. Gruesome holes throughout his body that bleed profusely, his clothes damp with blood, and a piece of slag lodged in his forehead.

Her mind was suddenly snapped out of her trance as a thundering chatter erupted. A mighty burst of muzzle flashes erupted, further illuminating the night, shadows cast across the ghost town as the mighty machinegun opened up.

Echo watched in slight horror as pony thugs were quite literally chewed in half, losing limbs and other such body parts as Derreck cut lose with his mounted gun. Originally configured with a stock and pistol grip handle, Derreck had redesigned it with two hand grips and a trigger plate, much like the original M2 Browning the gun was designed off.

The belt of shells glided along Echo's hooves as she guided the belt of ammo towards the gun. Large empty brass spat out of the gun, along with the linkage, the man slowly swinging the barrel to and fro, chopping down dozens of thugs in the process.

Echo's stomach seemed to twist as she watched the horror. She wondered to herself, even if most of the ponies did deserve to be put down, did they deserve this style of execution? She looked to Derreck, now realizing that he was roaring and that she was deaf from the chattering heavy machinegun. He kept shifting in her mind, between that of himself and the bloodied version of Evan.

The gun shook on the tripod, muzzle flashing and the barrel starting to heat up. Echo looked back out to the town as the truck's emergency brake was engaged, the front tires turning instinctively as Juggernaut promptly pulled off a 180 degree slide.

As the truck skidded around, Derreck continued to hose down ponies with heavy metal jacketed slugs that completely chewed apart anything they struck. A group of ponies tried feverishly to shoot down The Punisher but instead were themselves cut down as a hail of .50 caliber shells completely eviscerated the porch they were hiding on.

Ponies began to scatter as a group of pegasi mobilized into formation, skyrocketing after the truck. Derreck elevated the machinegun's aim and began to mow down the airborne unit whom quickly broke off pursuit.

Derreck's entire body tensed, muscles rippling as he held the gun tight while it went off, chewing apart anything he aimed upon. The man let out one continuous war scream as the town's population was quickly cut down.

A lone thug burst out of a building's front entrance, his body covered in belts of dynamite sticks and other various explosives. Lighting a bundle of TNT, the stallion hucked the explosives at the truck which landed by it's intended target and soon erupted.

The entire truck rocked, coming off the ground slightly and running on two wheels as Echo was knocked to the side. Her head and mind spun as she was dazed, beginning to see visions again. Looking to the big man, he again seemed to shift to the blood riddled version of himself, whom unholstered Belladonna and took aim on the perpetrator.

Firing a trio of shots, the gun recoiled in his hand with every shot but he seemed to instinctively reacquire his target within a heartbeat and fire again. The stallion's explosive belt was struck with an aimed shot, one of the dynamite sticks going off and subsequently setting off all his other explosives.

The building he had been standing out front of blew apart in a fiery eruption of high explosive, again shaking the truck but not as badly as the first explosion. Echo shook off her daze and Derreck returned to his normal self. He looked to her with a plain expression and seemed to again change to his bloodied form. “Stay here... ah'll be back,” he told her in a deep tone.

Echo watched as the big man stood up, flipping open a large case and slinging an all black sniper's rifle across his back, along with a deathly looking six barreled machinegun to his side. The blood riddled man stepped out of the now stationary, but still operational, Juggernaut.

Ponies scurried into formation near the blown apart building, taking aim on the man with illegal auto-bows and some unicorns with their own horns. They all watched in horror as the hellish man continued to slowly walk towards them, some of the thugs taking a step or two back.

As he neared ever closer, one of the stallions yelled out. “ALRIGHT, DROP 'IM!” The entire formation opened fire, magical blasts from unicorns and crossbow bolts shooting into the man. His clothing was quickly tattered and his skin was chewed up, some of the shots just grazing his body or missing completely.

As the man drew dangerously close, he drew out Belladonna, her chrome finish dulling slightly and the handle's engravings changing to that of a Yin-Yang. However, her worded engravings never changed, still brightly illuminated and reading out her name and prayer.

Burdy casually took aim at a stallion and popped him in the chest, the stallion's body knocked back from the immense force of the handgun. The others still continued to fire but ever so slowly, were shot down one by one. Each shot shook the gun in Burdy's hand, a massive muzzle flash spitting out of the gun along with a jacketed 300g slug.

As things continued to grow dire for the thugs, they split off and began to run. Burdy took aim with Belladonna and squeezed back on the trigger, but nothing happened. With a plain look, he examined the gun, the slide locked back.

Rather casually, he holstered the handgun and unslung the hefty six barreled machinegun from his side, hand-cranking the barrel just slightly before taking hold of the mighty cannon.

The barrels spun to life and the man looked to the town with an expressionless face. Turning to one side, he let loose on a building, the muzzle end of the gun a mere constant flash of light as a hail of bullets chewed apart the face of the building.

Ponies nearby began to scream in terror and scatter, now realizing the fight was truly lost. In a slow, sweeping arc, Burdy hosed down a line of houses with the Minigun, more and more ponies abandoning the fight and deserting the town as the hellish man brought his namesake legend back to life. He truly was, in every description of his name, The Punisher...

The barrels of the gun began to glow red hot and steam as the man slowly walked down the main street of the town, the buzzing of the machinegun louder than anything else. The man's face stayed expressionless... cold... empty...

Echo watched in terror and triumph. It was beyond anything she had ever seen in her life. Never before had she thought such a thing possible... not in Equestria anyhow. A lone crossbow shot drove into her flank, dropping her to the floor of the truck with a scream. The shot had been a stray, and a lucky one at that. She yelped out in agony as she tried to pull it free but could not muster the strength to push through the pain.

Outside, the buzzing eruption of gunfire came to an end as the weapon's ammunition supply was drained. There was still a whirring as the barrels continued to spin. Looking around to all the damage, the bloodied man dropped the hefty gun, continuing to ominously look from side to side.

The fires of the town could be seen for miles but was located so distantly from any other town that it fell upon blind eyes. The brighter illumination of the fires stretched out a few hundred feet, dimming as one got further away.

Thugs from the town continued to scurry in all different directions, giving up on the town and abandoning it for good. Looking to the distance, he spotted a certain green pony making a run for it.

Bringing Trillium, his jet black sniper rifle, to bear, he took close aim through the scope's magnification lens. Judging the distance between them, Burdy quickly compensated and squeezed the trigger.

The long rifle jolted in his tight grip, spitting out a long .30 caliber slug at supersonic speeds. In almost the same instant he heard the distant yelp of the stallion as the bullet tore clean through his lower hindleg.

Slinging the gun, the man began to walk back to the truck as his wounds slowly healed shut. Echo winced in pain but went completely silent as she looked to the man walking towards her. The fire in the background shadowed him in such a way she would've cried in fear had he been after her.

At first he looked like Evan. Older, but with smooth skin and a gentle appearance. As he continued to walk forwards his body seemed to change in her mind. His form took a far more powerful, masculine look. He also appeared younger but his facial features were heavily scarred.

His body changed one final time, turning into a mix between the duo. He looked much younger, like a man in his prime, but with a facial recognition closer to Evan's. However, his entire body was riddled with wounds that dampened his clothing.

A large piece of slag jutted out from his forehead, blood dripping down his face. The white skull on his tattered shirt seemed to be burning with a dark blue flame. “Guh! ECHO!” came Evan's voice, herself being shaken from her trance like state and the man's body returning to proper form.

He rushed to her side, examining her wound. “A-are... are you alright?” he gasped, Echo rolling her eyes.

“I've just been shot, dingus... how do you think I am?” she grunted, the pain in her flank nearly unbearable.

“Uhh... right...” his hands lowered to the crossbow bolt. “I-I... I know you said n-not to touch your... your flank b-but...” he slowly pressed his hands to her flank, around the base of the wound.

Echo rolled her eyes and winced in pain. “It... it's gonna hurt a little bit,” he told her.

“J-just... just do it already!” she cried out just before a yelp left her mouth as Evan yanked out the arrow. The wound spurted a bit of blood but Evan applied immediate pressure before leaning his head down.

Very gingerly, he pressed his lips to the wound, Echo gasping in slight pleasure, the aphrodisiac Liquid had given her earlier spiking her arousal. “GWAH! D-D-DID YOU JUST...” Echo trailed off, Evan looking to her as he wiped his lips of blood. It was then she realized there was a slight numbing feeling in her flank before all the pain resided.

Echo looked back to the man and spoke in a flustered way, her cheeks going cherry red. “Did you just kiss my flank?” she nearly gushed, Evan's own cheeks going faint red.

“W-w-wull... well I mean... when you put it like that-” he was cut off as she kissed his cheek, knowing full well what he had actually done.

“Thank you,” she whispered to him but was suddenly interrupted by the other man, who coughed to gain their attention.

“Well... I hate to break up your little blush-fest but... do you still wanna kill that stallion or what?” he asked...

Liquid staggered to all fours but then flumped down again as the pain in his leg became to much to bear. He began to drag himself along, cursing all the while.

K-CHING!

Liquid gasped as he looked up, looking down the business end of Belladonna's triangular muzzle. “Ah-ah-ahh,” Derreck stated, Liquid gulping.

“Y-you!” He snarled, Derreck shrugging.

“Yeah, you're right... me...” he murmured before looking to Echo. Offering her the gun as he spoke to her. “Here... you might as well do it. Sate your vengeance and fulfill your greatest desire.” Echo grasped the hefty handgun with her magic and levitated it at Liquid, who grunted in dismay.

“No... no wait! Echo! DON'T DO IT!” He pleaded.

“Just be thankful I'm making this painless,” she snapped back before pulling on the trigger.

'CLICK!'

She nearly gasped as the handgun's hammer snapped down but the gun didn't go off. Derreck merely chuckled as Echo looked at the gun with a blankly confused stare. “Oh yeah... I forgot that gun's particular about stuff,” he laughed as he drew out his H&K MK 23 pistol. “Here, use this one. It'll get the job done,” he told her, while Liquid tried to crawl away.

Derreck stomped on his injured leg, making the rapist scream out in agony. “Not one more yard, you little shit!” he snapped.

“WAIT!” Evan gasped as he grabbed Belladonna from Echo's grasp. Echo and Derreck looked to the man. “M-maybe... maybe we shouldn't. If we do... how much better are we than them?” he asked honesty, Derreck in turn rolling his eyes.

“Evan... do you remember Tristan?” he asked, bringing back painful memories to the stallion. “This stallion... is just like him. Raped her and got away with it. Don't tell me if you came face to face with Tristan again you'd seriously consider bringing him in instead?!” Derreck snapped back.

“I'm just saying think about it!” Evan yelled back, the two getting into each other's faces.

“THINK ABOUT WHAT?!” Derreck yelled aggressively. “HE RAPED HER! RIPPED OUT HER... whatever it was, and left her barren! What's there to think about?!” he yelled.

Evan was fast on the counter however. “Once you kill him, there's no going back on it. If you decide afterwards that you didn't truly want a vengeful death, it'll be too late!” Evan snapped, Derreck rolling his eyes.

“She dragged us halfway across the fucking country! I think she has her mind made up! Goddammit Echo, shoot the prick already!” Derreck ordered, Echo now conflicted and Liquid speaking up.

“Echo... look deep, and think about what you really want. Think back on all the times we had,” Liquid cooed her like a snake charmer.

She became completely divided. One moment looking to the two arguing men who began bickering amongst themselves, the next to the stallion whom until now, she had wanted dead beyond anything else.

“Echo...” Liquid purred. “Do you truly want to kill me in cold blood?” he asked in a suave voice, the truth serum kicking in and making her pause. Time seemed to slow until she finally made up her mind. “You and I, have unfinished business!” she snarled coldly, Liquid sighing as Echo readied the gun.

"Doll... you ain't kiddin'," he replied in a defeated voice. In a quick instant however, Liquid lunged at her, knocking the gun aside and swinging out a small blade, slashing at her. In quick response, Echo slapped the outside of his wrist, knocking the swipe harmlessly to the side before trying to grab her own blade. Liquid, despite his injuries, spotted her move and swung his blade low, slicing off her utility belt and flinging it away.

Driving home for a stab, Liquid thrust with his blade. Lightning fast, like a lunging snake, Echo used her left hoof to slap away his thrust whilst driving her right hoof into the center of his chest and twisting it. Liquid winced in minor discomfort as Echo cocked back her foreleg, like that of a King Cobra coiling for a strike.

In a blur of motion, she drove five perfectly placed strikes into various locations on his torso. Liquid gasped painfully, a spew of blood leaving his mouth and splattering against Echo's face. With a wheeze, he hacked again, more blood...

There was a sudden, and most bitter silence that surrounded them as the two big men stopped fighting, sensing something had changed. Echo's eyes went wide as she realized what she had done, now unable to go back on it. Liquid was left blinking with a most pale expression, soon coming to the realization that his fate was now sealed in the chambers of time.

Echo's hoof slowly retracted, shaking feverishly as her lip quivered. She looked to her former lover, remembering all the cherished times they had together, and not the bad ones. Liquid very calmly, and smoothly, wiped his chin clean with a hoof. “You learned the... Five Step... Heart Exploding, Strike Technique...” he whispered.

Echo nodded before speaking. “There's actually six strikes, when you include the twist in the beginning...” Her voice was shaky and betrayed her rising emotions, partly in due to the serum she had been given.

“I... I'm so... so proud of you Echo,” he told her honestly. “Who taught you?” he asked curiously. Echo looked to Derreck and Evan, whom themselves had turned to the duo and waited while the events unfolded.

“He did,” she responded, motioning to Derreck, knowing there was truly only one man, and that it was Derreck's mind games playing tricks on her to make her believe there was truly two. Liquid looked to the big brute and gave him a knowing nod.

“Than... he truly is a warrior of unimaginable legend and... soon enough, so be it, you will be too,” he said proudly, rubbing his hoof gently down her cheek. “Why didn't you tell me?” he asked softly, tears now coming to Echo's eyes as she shook her head.

“I... I don't know... I guess... it's because I'm a snaky little bitch,” she whimpered, holding back her sobs. Half of her was overjoyed with triumph, the other half bitterly sorrowful for reasons she couldn't explain. Liquid gasped in retort, shaking his head.

“No! No, you were never a snaky bitch. I... I was just an arrogant, blind asshole...” he trailed off and looked into her eyes. “You are a wonderful, beautiful pony... my favorite, little pony... but every now and then... you can be a real cunt,” he told her, the two sharing a brief laugh together.

Liquid tucked in his shirt, making his suit coat cover the blood stains now on his white shirt. “So...” he began. “How do I look?” he asked calmly. Echo held the stallion's hoof tenderly, her heart thumping as she nearly burst into sobs, her emotions spiked beyond control by the serum but even so, she knew what she had done and knew she couldn't go back on it now, just like Evan had warned.

“You look ready,” she told him assuringly and the stallion took a deep breath. Standing up, he turned around and began to slowly walk away, limping slightly from the rifle wound in his leg. And, true to the legend's tale, after he had taken but a mere five steps, he collapsed to the ground, dead as dead could be.

Derreck sighed as he walked over to Juggernaut, setting his gear away as Evan walked over to Echo's side. “It's why I said to wait...” he told her, knowing how she felt. He took off his holy necklace and handed it to her. “Go with god now... and maybe he'll show you the way...” Echo looked down to the necklace he had given her, thinking deep.

When she looked back up however, the man was gone. She looked around and saw she had been left alone with Derreck, whom was fitting his gear to leave. Trotting over, she spoke to the man.

“So what now?” she asked, still shaken by the events that had unfolded. Derreck wiped his hands off on his pants before turning to her, perking a brow.

“Damn... hope yah don't mind me saying Echo... you look hot,” he expressed himself bluntly, making Echo blush as the aphrodisiac coursing through her veins took further effect on her mind.

“E-Echo?” she asked, hearing her name from him in the first time since he had disowned her.

“Well yeah... unless you've come to liking me call you Snake? I dunno... what you did was wrong but I can't hate you forever for it... goddess, you're giving me a semi,” he said before taking off his shirt.

“W-w-wa-what are you doing?!” she stammered just before he tossed his shirt at her.

“It's the whole... soaked in your enemy's blood look... I like it a lot,” he stated and the mare shivered, wondering if she should instead just leave the blood on her fur for him to stare at. Quickly realizing it was the serum doing the thinking for her, she wiped the blood away, but not before taking a deep inhale of the man's shirt, breathing in the scent of his powerful musk that made her entire body quiver.

Taking the shirt away, a blush came across her cheeks as she handed him back the shirt, the man setting it aside and standing with his chest bare. “So you don't hate me anymore?” she asked and the man sighed as he motioned with his finger for her to come closer.

Leaning in she was shocked as the man grabbed her, pulling her body close to his own, pressing his lips to hers. Her eyes went wide but wider still as she felt his hand pressed to her stomach, a numbing sensation coming across her abdomen.

Suddenly the man pulled away with a grunt of pain, falling to his knees and swearing vulgarly. “JESUS H. FUCKING CHRIST!” He groaned, falling to his side and grasping his gut. Echo looked to the man and gasped as she realized he now had a deep scar on his abdomen, one like her own...

A hoof touched where her scar once was, now vacant and soft as it naturally used to be. “HOLY SHIT! WHAT DID HE DO TO YOU! FUUUUUUCK!” Derreck roared as he rolled around on the ground in agonizing pain. Echo blinked blankly as she rubbed her belly once more before taking her hoof away.

Finally coming to a stop, the man groaned and just withered there for a moment before the scar on his gut slowly faded and he rose back up. “Why did you do that?” Echo asked, knowing full well what he had done.

“Now... in the future, when you bear a foal... when it grows up... whenever you look to it, into his or her eyes, and say you love them... you'll be haunted by the memory, the knowing... that it was me... and me alone, that gave you a second chance... and your children, will be because of me,” he told her.

She planted a kiss on his cheeks, her lower region growing warm in arousal from the aphrodisiac that was still running her mind a mess. “Thank you,” she whispered and Derreck blinked blankly.

“Oh goddess dammit...” he leaned against the truck and put his cheek into the palm of his hand as he grumbled. “I try to forever punish the mare, and she turns around and thinks of it as a gift.” Echo stood to her hindlegs and pressed her lips to the man's in a feverish display of lust but also as thanks.

“The ability to give life is the greatest gift...” she whispered before their lips met again in fiery passion.

The man just shrugged as he thought to himself, his shaft going from a semi to a full rock hard erection in an instant. 'Well... that escalated quickly...'

Echo pressed the man's body between herself and the truck's hull, her front hooves wrapped around his neck as one of her lower legs wrapped around his waist and dampened his crotch with her sopping box, partially in due to the serum but also her own natural arousal.

Echo's tongue penetrated the man's mouth, the duo beginning to moan into one another. She explored his depth, most fascinated with his predator-like canines, making her body shiver.

Twirling their bodies, Derreck swung her through the back door of Juggernaut, laying her flat on her back against the floor of the battle truck. Echo gasped in pleasure as the man began to slowly kiss and suckle her neck, his hips slowly grinding against her own.

Her horn lit up and grasped his belt, slipping it off and yanking down his pants as well. The man grunted in effort as he dragged her body slightly back and crawled fully atop of her, kicking aside his pants and underwear, now fully bare.

Their lips again connected, their bodies moving against one another. The red mare beneath the man moaned pleasurably as she felt his bare skin rub against her soft fur body, his hard erection dripping precum onto her belly.

Her front hooves explored his back, running up and down it. The man's kisses and suckles moved down her neck, making her shiver as he got to her collar bone, his deadly canines brushing against her skin just briefly, making her quiver beneath him.

Her front hooves ran down his muscular arms as she moaned to him. “Bite me,” she whispered in a hushed voice. Derreck perked a brow.

“What?” he asked, strangely confused.

“Bite me, and make me your mare,” she whined and he kept his brow risen.

“I... ah-ha-ha... I'm not some kinda vampony, you know,” he laughed and she huffed.

“Just bite, you stud!” she whined out. The man rolled his eyes and bit down on her neck, hard enough to hurt, but not hard enough to pierce skin. Echo screamed out in pleasurable pain whilst her hindlegs wrapped around the man's hips.

Holding her in a tight grip, the man's hips leaned back, finding his mark. It wasn't hard, as her box was sopping wet and drooling like some kind of dog. 'Goddess she's wet... what's gotten into her?' he thought to himself before smirking. 'Me, pretty soon.'

The man pressed the tip of his erection into the mare's wet flower, the two moaning in unison from the shock wave of pleasure that ravaged their bodies. He pushed inwards, her outer lips folding around his length as he began to slowly penetrate her, inch after meaty inch of his cock sliding into her velvety hole.

Echo moaned out wildly in pleasure. The serum amplifying her pleasure a good ten times over, her tongue lolling out the side of her mouth as she let out another throaty moan. With a final shove, the man drove himself into the mare, Echo letting out a squeal as she hit her peak rather early, juices spurting out from her love tunnel, slipping past the man's cock and drooling out onto the floor of the truck.

Echo shuddered and shivered as her orgasm raged on while the man began to pull back for another thrust, her senses blurring out of control. She couldn't even piece together words of pleasure, just vocal moans and whines.

Derreck slid back into her with a relatively soft thrust, making Echo squeal in further delight as her orgasm dragged on, her pussy leaking femcum like a dripping faucet. Her entire body shook and shivered as she felt the man's girth stretching her wide. In her euphoric state, she could feel every texture of the man's cock, every vein, the ridge of where the cock's head started, everything...

The man's mouth left her neck, leaving his mark clearly visible as he pressed his lips to hers again. Echo was lost in bliss, not even bothering to wrestle his tongue as he dominated her, his tongue driving into the back of her throat. Her mind was lost in bliss, a rainbow of colors tainting her vision as she succumbed even further to her ongoing orgasm that didn't seem to end.

She managed a thought, through all the lust. 'What if... I'm not having an orgasm... what if there's still something more?' she asked herself, before promptly getting lost in all the fiery lust...

The man continued sliding in and out of the mare, her pussy's inner walls suckling against his shaft with a schlucking noise. The back of the truck quickly reeked of their sex, the puddle on the floor only growing larger as time went on.

The man grabbed her hips, gripping them tightly as he continued to thrust her, her tight hole squeezing down on him so pleasurably he knew he'd go off at any moment, though when he hadn't a clue.

Derreck was lost in a world of rather plain, rather vanilla pleasure. It felt so good, almost the best, but he yearned for more which was slowly being fed to him. He leaned into her, his tongue slowly going up her neck and making her shudder. Stopping at the base of her ear, he leaned up a little further and nibbled on the tip.

Echo, through all the moans, managed a giggle as she rubbed her front hooves down his cheek, his neck and finally down his muscular, burly chest. Looking down, she watched as his shaft went in and out of her, coated in her juices and cum. Every time he slid into her, he went deep, but not as deep as he could go. It was almost like he was teasing her yet still fulfilling her desires.

She timed herself and as she felt him sliding into her, thrusted her hips into his groin, driving him that extra depth she so craved. Echo let out a scream as she felt his cock press against her cervix. Her moans continued to echo in the cabin of the truck as the man grunted, her inner muscles convulsing around his cock.

She just imagined in, through the hazy cloud of lust. The man driving himself deep, squirting his load deep into her new womb... seeding her. She wished to herself she could moan out for him to cream her, but couldn't manage the words through all the lusty whines.

Derreck huffed and snorted like a wild rutting bull, holding her body tight to his as he started to feel a tingly numbing sensation in his cock, knowing it would be only moments away. “Oh goddess... mhmm...” Derreck huffed, signaling his impending climax.

Echo felt him nearing, how his cock started to tense, his body stiffening. As he went to pull out, her hindlegs wrapped tightly around his back, pulling him in close and driving him one last time into her, his cock pressed firmly against her womb's entrance.

The duo both shuddered as he went off like a broken fire hydrant. The first jetted load set Echo off beyond the height of orgasmic high, her eyes rolling into the back of her head as she felt her womb being filled with the man's spunk. Her last thoughts being kinky aroused notations of how her fresh soil was being seeded...

The man grunted and huffed as his climax raged like a wild beast. Finally, after several moments, he sighed and flopped down beside her, pulling out of her well used slit with a 'SCHLUUUUCK!'

His seed leaked out of her in globs, along with her own juices as the man fitted a cigar into his lips. “A well deserved bonus...”

* * *

Evan's perspective...

I awoke with a bit of a chill. Despite the fact the back door to Juggernaut was closed, it was still rather frigid, more so than usual. I sat up and noticed it reeked rather badly in the truck... like vivid sex. I also took notice that Echo was gone, and in her place a small note tabbed to my pants.

'Dear Evan and Derreck,

Words alone cannot explain my thanks to you both, and know you will always hold a spot in my heart. I would've said goodbye, but you looked too cute when you were dozing, so I left you asleep. I guess this is goodbye, and I hope our paths cross again one day.

Truly yours,

Echo Jewel, xoxo'

The bottom of the note had a red lipstick kiss mark on it.

I sat up and rolled my shoulders, quickly spotting my Arnie cigar and fitting it into my mouth. Mouthing it from side to side, I slipped on my underwear and pants, not knowing why in Tartarus I would've fallen asleep with them off, especially with it being this cold out. Leaving my shirt off for the time being, I opened the back cabin door of Juggernaut and felt a guster of cold wind bluster past.

Shivering, I stepped out as flakes of ash from the burnt out ghost town fluttered down upon the world, coating the ground all around. 'Damn... Celestia is going to shit a chicken...' I thought to myself as I stepped out, still chewing on my cigar.

As I stood lonesome, I took notice of something about the ashes... namely when one landed on my nose and melted. It wasn't ash falling from the sky and coating the ground. It was snowing...

Author's Note

OH MAN! That was so awesome! I was imagining this all happening as I wrote it, Burdy being all like *Hums Terminator 2 theme* and he's like "VZZZZZZZ!" with the minigun and everything's blowing up in such a cliche 80s action movie way and then he's spouting one liners and then... yeah, they were having sex and I just face palmed like "Yeah... yeah they're having sex now" It's just... I dunno, seeing a dude humping a colorful unicorn is weird. Cheers yah'll, and if I don't get the next chapter out in time, Merry Christmas.//

I left the fridge open as I looked back to Scootaloo with a plain look. "Well, I'm gonna have some coffee. You want something to drink?" I asked the young filly. "You want some milk?" I asked her, who looked to me with those innocent little eyes of her. I tried to think about something else I could responsibly give to a filly but then just rubbed the back of my neck.

"I dunno, you want milk? I got... milk?" I asked unsurely. She smiled casually as she spoke.

"Coffee's fine," she told me and I rose a rather interested brow, challenging her decision. "What? I drink it! I'm cool like you and Dash!" she stated. I sighed with a roll of my eyes.

"I dunno kid. I drink espresso, you know... it's like coffee-zilla," I warned, Scootaloo shrugging and brushing off my warning like I had said it was just de-caf.

"I said I'm... cool..."

Hearth's Warming Pt. II

'Spirit of the holiday...'

Derreck's perspective...

I took a seat across from the two stallions with a relieved sigh, my entire body relaxing. The same, however, could not be said for the stallions, of whom I was their guest. They both looked unnervingly cautious, but also rather agitated by my presence here.

“So... the day before, eh...” I tried to start a conversation about the upcoming holiday which was tomorrow. Flam gave me a steely glare, shifting slightly in his wheelchair. “Any plans?” I asked, to which Flam shook his head rather coldly. I could tell, just by the vibes they were giving off. They wanted me gone more than anything in the world.

“No, as a matter of fact, we don't. Why might you ask?” Flim almost snarled, his tone nearly threatening. I leaned back, resting the back of my head into my hands.

“Well... I dunno, it's Lassie's first ever Hearth's Warming and she wants to have some ponies over... and I have this hinting suspicion that Twilight and her friends still hate Evan and myself-” Flam butted in with a rather rude retort.

“Hmph, I wonder why?” he stated sarcastically.

“Cause you two tried to frame me for killing those royal guards, and now they think I did,” I stated, ever so casually. Flam's grip on his wheelchair tightened as he shouted back at me.

“WE NEVER!... It wasn't supposed to... I'M PARALYZED!” He screamed at me and I shrugged vicariously, not having a care about it.

“Would you have really cared in the least if I had've been sentenced?” I asked in a calm demeanor, Flim speaking up.

“Of course we would have! We were forced into it. It's not like we had a choice,” Flim stated, myself rolling my eyes.

“Everypony gets a choice... for example...” I trailed off as I reached into my duster's side pocket and pulled out a cartoon of eggnog. “Want some?” I offered the brothers, whom looked at me cautiously. "See, at this point... you can either accept a drink from me or... not. That's your choice." The two continued to stare at me, not budging in the slightest.

“I won't bite. At least... not hard,” I teased, taking out two glasses for the stallions and pouring them each a generous amount. The two stallions looked at the drinks, reluctant to accept my most simple gift offering.

Feeling a draft come in through the door, I looked outside, where there was still sand visible on the desert ground. “You know, you guys are kinda lucky out here. Desert's pretty warm compared to back home. Fricken' snowing out like a freak storm... guess all the snow decided to come at once, huh?” I asked.

The duo didn't answer. Instead of speaking, I nudged the drinks closer to them, Flim turning his nose up at it. I huffed before speaking. “Listen... I know you don't like me-” Flam snapped in and cut my sentence short.

“You paralyzed me!” he shouted and I shrugged.

“You tried to frame me-” and then it was Flim's turn to cut in.

“Which we were forced to do without much choice!” he yelled at me.

“There's always a choice. You just chose the simpler route-” Flam cut me off.

“I WILL NEVER WALK AGAIN!” he yelled. I tapped my fingers together before speaking.

“I will admit... our friendship is a rather... unhealthy and most strained one... without a single bit of trust between us... but it's a necessary friendship. You fix and repair my vehicles, and in return I bring you a most generous income and use those vehicles to bring in said income. It's how the world goes round. Without one, there cannot be the other two...” I trailed off and slid their drinks even closer.

“So...” I lifted the carton of remaining eggnog. “Here's to being... flawed, awful, totally uncomfortable, poorly matched friends... and uhh... to the holiday and a happy new year,” I proposed.

They must have figured there was no harm in toasting, as the two rose their glasses to my cartoon. Flim nodded hesitantly. “To a hopeful new year I suppose...” he said, almost regretfully.

Flam chipped in, rather cynically. “I hope you choke on it.”

I shrugged as I brought the carton's opening to my lips. “Well... here's hoping...”

* * *

Juggernaut made no attempts to conceal our return as we pulled up to the mansion of a home. Her engine rumbled and chugged until the very moment I shut her down.

Snow continued to fall in a rather blissful way, continuing to pile up on the ground, and almost immediately on Juggernaut as well. I opened the driver side door and made my exit, immediately feeling the cold draft of true winter temperatures.

“Ahh-brrrrr!” I shivered to myself, quickly shutting the door and making for the front entrance of the home. I didn't, however, make it even five feet as a most ecstatic voice echoed out.

“You're home, YOU'RE HOME, YOU'RE HOME!” Cried out the voice as I spotted a plume of snow rushing towards me. My eyes went wide just before I was tackled to the snowy ground, a wet slimy tongue dancing across my face.

“Ahh... guhh... ah-ha-ha,” I laughed as I began to pat and rub the canine's face. She contiued to cover my face wit dog kisses and evidently the wet saliva quickly became frigid cold on my exposed cheeks.

“Okay... ahh... Lassie... come on... eh... ah-ha-ha,” I couldn't stop laughing as she embraced me in a loving way. “Okay, come on, you can molest me when we're inside,” I told her and she quickly stopped her assault.

“Really?!” she replied in an almost too hopeful voice. With that she got off me and I made for the entrance. As I stepped inside, Alfred was at the door waiting.

“Shall I take Sir's coat to dry?” he offered and I shrugged off my coat.

“Sure, thanks Alfred.” I handed him my black duster just as I kicked shut the door behind me. “I'm home!” I called out to my family but Lassie just nudged me.

“Discord went home to be with Fluttershy for the holidays. Chrysalis went back to her homelands, something about being homesick. Trixie is here... somewhere, doing... magical stuff, or something,” she stated and I perked a brow.

“So who is home?” I asked wonderingly. Lassie rubbed her chin before pointing to Alfred whom was making his way down the hallway with my coat.

“Well... Alfred stayed because... oh, actually, Ni-” she was cut off as a presence tackled me to the floor, pressing her lips to mine. “Her,” Lassie stated but I didn't need to be told who it was.

Her lips separated from mine and I nuzzled my nose into hers. “It seems thou missed us quite immensely,” Nightmare teased and I just rolled my eye, giving her a kiss to the cheek.

“And you didn't?” I teased back. We lay like that for some time, just staring into each other's eyes. “You know... I think I'm the luckier one in this relationship,” I stated, Lassie commenting on it.

“Because you go around laying random mares like a stud?” she teased, Nightmare giggling about the comment. I sighed with a slight chuckle.

“No... because I get two beautiful eyes to look at,” I told her sincerely, but her comeback was pretty witty and cute.

“Well your one is just as good as my two, so I think we're pretty even,” she replied back before planting a kiss on my lips, which I wholesomely embraced. We continued to lay there, just staring into each other's eyes like heart-struck fillies.

Lassie scoffed and broke us both out of our trance like state. “This fondling crap is too sappy for me. I'm going to get something to eat,” Lassie informed us, the mention of food making my stomach rumble.

“Oh yeah, hey, I'm starving,” I pitched in, quickly getting up and making Lassie laugh.

“Well tough tits. I'm not cooking for you,” she giggled, Nightmare planting a kiss on my cheek.

“Don't worry, lover, I'll cook something for you,” she offered. I followed Lassie into the kitchen, whom merely poured herself some cereal. “So, Derreck, what would you like to have?” Nightmare asked and I pondered the question briefly before looking to the box of Fruity Hoops.

“You know... I think I'll have what she's having,” I said as I pulled up a chair for myself. Nightmare looked to me with a baffled expression.

“WAHHH... of anything you could possibly desire, thou chooses... cereal?” she nearly gasped and Lassie shot her a look.

“The hay is wrong with cereal?” she asked interrogatively.

Nightmare blinked in complete shock before answering. “It's cliché,” she noted, Lassie remarking about her comment.

“Well... cliché tastes good.” Lassie, instead of using utensils, lowered her face to the dish and began to slurp the cereal, making a bit of a mess on the table. Pouring myself a dish of cereal and milk, I went to chow down, but a voice interrupted me.

“Evan! You're back!” Trixie exclaimed, and I nodded, deciding against trying to explain I wasn't Evan. “Did you bring Trixie the eggnog she requested. I rose my finger to say 'Yes I did,' then realized that I had in fact shared said eggnog with Flim and Flam earlier.

“You wouldn't believe it but... it went sour on my way through the desert,” I lied fluently. She gave me a frown and I sighed. “I'll get another one, I promise,” I told her but her look persisted.

“How can we celebrate Hearth's Warming without eggnog?” she asked, Lassie speaking up in a quippy tone.

“With cereal,” she mocked the magician mare, whom wouldn't have any of it.

“Well, Trixie is surprised at you Lassie. You were so excited about your first ever Hearth's Warming yet now you seem less than enthusiastic about it,” Trixie made note, Lassie's ears perking up.

“Ohhhhh yeeeahhhh! Hey Derreck, you gotta go get some eggnog so we can properly celebrate Hearth's Warming!” she said in a rushed voice. I blinked and nodded, trying to get a spoonful of my cereal. “Come on, hurry! Before it's sold out!” she chimed and I sighed regretfully.

“Okay... okay. I'm going, I'm going,” I mused to myself. I'd have to get some cereal when I got back. As I took my coat and jingled the keys to Juggernaut I felt a pair of wet lips press against my cheek, nearly making me jump. I turned to meet Nightmare, whom gave me a warming look.

“They probably forgot to say thank you. It really does mean a lot to them. Ever since the beginning of the month it's all either one of them talked about,” Nightmare stated. I gave her cheek a rub with the palm of my hand. For such a feared pony and myth, she really was loving once one got to know her.

Slipping on my jet black coat, I stepped outside and shuddered from the cold. “Damn... it's chilly out,” I mumbled before whistling to Juggernaut. Snow rained from the skies, and despite being midday it was rather dim out, the sun clouded out by dark overcast.

Stepping into the lumbering beast of a truck, I keyed the ignition and blasted the heat. Patting the steering wheel, I decided on quick conversation with the automobile, much like Evan did with Cadance. “Hey, Juggernaut... uhh... yeah...” was all I really got out before pulling away...

* * *

I leaned on the shopping cart as I slowly puttered down the isles of Ponyville's small grocery mart. Isle after isle I'd slowly toss things into my cart, mostly stuff I didn't need but what would be considered 'festive'.

As the time passed, my shopping cart started to stockpile with festive crap but I still hadn't got what I truly came in for. 'Damn eggnog,' I thought to myself, Evan's voice returning as my conscious.

'Yeah, but you did promise Trixie,' he told me, making me roll my eye. Alright, I'd give him that. As I continued on, I began tossing more junk into the cart; sugar cookies, crap to make a gingerbread house... all that good... crap.

As I made my way around a corner I nearly bumped into another pony's cart, immediately pulling mine to a stop. “Ah-ha, so...” I trailed off as I met eyes with Twilight, Evan's... whatever he considered her.

She looked to me with a silent stare. It wasn't one of hatred, or resent or anything like that. It was a most pale look... an almost hurt expression, before a tear came to her eye and she rushed off, Spike calling out for her to slow down as he chased after her.

I let out a sigh as I continued to wander through the grocery mart. Looking out a window, I watched as the conditions outside got worse and worse with every passing minute. “Ha-ha-ha... this is gonna be a shitty Christmas... err, whatever the hell these ponies call it,” I muttered with a chuckle.

As the conditions outside continued to worsen, I finally made my way to the dairy section, were the products were kept under cooler temperatures. Looking over all the selection, I had a hard time finding what I was looking for, but my eye finally fell upon the prize. “AH-HA!” I announced aloud as I reached in and grabbed the last carton of eggnog.

'And not a second too soon!' Evan's voice chimed, myself nodding as I placed the eggnog in my cart. Just as I went to leave, I heard an elderly voice pick up behind me.

“Darn it all... darn it all to hay!” snapped the voice. The voice was... familiar. I had a suspicious idea but not one set in stone. Turning around, I nearly gasped as I saw the mare.

“G-Granny Smith?” I stammered, the mare looking to me and squinting her eyes to get a better look.

“Hey... hey it's you... you, that... that thing,” she mentioned, poking me with her cane and making me step back as she stepped closer. “Yeah... yeah it is you. Were around in the summer season helpin' us with crop an' such... ain't seen yah 'round much lately,” she said in her... nearly senile old voice.

'Hey, Derreck, that's not nice!' Evan's voice quipped and me, myself just rolling my eye. She did sound senile.

“Well, howdy... Granny Smith,” I said with a tip of my hat to which she began to mutter things.

“Darn tootin'... youngest granddaughter wanted some eggnog on Hearth's Warmin'... an' I done warned Big MacIntosh an' Applejack 'bout leavin' it tah the last minute... noooOOOOoooo, they tells me. They gots things tah do tahday, an' send me tah get it... told them it'd be all sold out... sure 'nough... done sold out!” she scowled as she pointed her cane at the spot where the eggnog had been.

My face turned to a frown as I groaned, taking a brief look to my cart and spotting the last, most eloquent, delicious... carton of eggnog. I closed my eye and let out a soft sigh as I reached back, grabbed the carton and offered it to her.

“Her, Granny Smith, you can have mine,” I told her to which she looked at me, then to the carton, and then back to me.

“Well... well ah'll be... are yah serious there sonny?” she almost stammered in disbelief. I just shrugged carelessly and she graciously took the carton and put it in her small shopping bag. “Well ain't yah just the sweetest thang! Applejack been talkin' foul a yah lately, sayin' yah done killed a whole bunch a good folk... bwah, rumors ah tell yah! RUMORS!” she announced as she began to walk away, still talking to herself as though I was beside her.

“Ah tell yah somethin', next time Applejack starts talkin' foul a yah, ah'm gonna tan her backside red ah am! Nicest pony 'round these parts yah are! Givin' me yer last carton a eggnog for nuttin'!...” she continued to ramble and I just watched her trot away while I shook my head in disbelief.

'Definitely senile,' I thought quietly to myself. I pondered around the mart for another hour or two before looking to my watch and seeing it was getting pretty late and that I should be getting home. I strolled towards the checkout where I stood another half hour in line before finally going to leave.

Just as I was reaching the exit, there was a charity food drive, giving food to the less fortunate during the holidays. I nearly tensed up in frustration as one of the cute little colts running the food drive looked to me.

“Care to donate to the food drive, sir?” he asked in an adorable little voice. He wasn't exactly dressed nicely, but he wasn't in rags either.

I nearly wanted to shit, thinking to myself in frustration. 'FUCK I HATE THESE PRICKS! They always stand at the fucking exit with these fucking food drives to make you feel like a dick for not donating meanwhile you're leaving with with all this food while they're going hungry during the holdiay... FUCKING MONEY GRAB!'

I put on a faked smile and nodded. “Of course, little buddy,” I said through a painstakingly obvious faked voice of genuine intent. “Here, have some...” I grabbed a box of sugar cookies. “Cookies, and maybe some...” I looked at the next item which was cereal. “Yeah, have some cereal too and...” I began handing them items as I listed them off, each item getting myself more and more frustrated before I nearly snapped.

“Ah, to hay with it!” I nearly swore, refraining from doing so simply because it was a colt I was speaking to. “I got lots of food at home,” I stated truthfully. “Here, just take it all,” I told them, pushing the cart towards them. Their eyes went wide with shock of the reality. “It would probably just go bad in my fridge anyway.”

“R-really?” the colt asked in a voice of disbelief which drove me further over the edge in anger and frustration.

“Y-yee-yeah... YEAH!” I nearly broke out in a furious rampage. “You know what?... Here, you might as well take my money too,” I continued to edge on my breaking point as I yanked off his little hat and emptied my wallet into it, a whole twelve thousand bits and change, to which he and the adult pony running the food drive went wide eyed in shock.

“S-sir-” the adult tried to object to which I cut him off.

“No-no, really... take it! I insist!” I nearly began to yell. “Tis the season, right?” I asked and he nearly broke down and cried, starting to try and hug me. “Nononono, NO! Just don't touch me, okay?!” I warned him to which he pulled out an old style flash camera. I began to wave my hands for him to stop as I tried to yell out. “Hey, what do you think you're-”

The flash of the camera went off and nearly blinded me, disorienting me slightly and, against my will, the little colt was hugging my leg. “Thank you so much sir, you're the kindest pony ever!” he said in a cute little accent that reminded me bitterly of Oliver Twist. Celestia, I just wanted to strangle the cunts of a bitch.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever kid. I gotta get home,” I told them as I stormed my way out and back to Juggernaut. I went in with a slew of cash, came out with nothing and totally out of money. 'Ha, feels like I just left a casino...'

The blizzard storm raged beyond belief, the gusty, frigid wind blustering so hard it nearly hurt my face. “Damn... lucky I brought my truck,” I thought silently as I stepped into the truck, keying the ignition and bringing the truck to life.

Blasting the heat, I wiped the melted snow from my face. Slipping the truck into gear, I quickly took off and started heading home. “Oh man... Trixie's gonna be pissed. Why'd you talk me into that?” I asked Evan, whom took spiritual form in the passenger seat.

“I didn't. You did that, along with the charity, on your own will. I had no input.” I gave him a stupid look, to which he returned. “I didn't say a word, of even give you a nudge.”

I scoffed as I pressed down on the accelerator. “Yeah, but I damn well knew you would've said something!” I scowled, Evan just chuckling.

“Maybe... but than again, maybe not. How would you know?” he asked, making me groan out but then smile.

“Because I know you all too well, old friend,” I smirked, to which he returned. We continued conversing on old times as we left the town's limits, the blizzard getting worse, to the point I could barely see the end of Juggernaut's hood.

“Holy shit...” Evan muttered and I nodded. “Whatta we do now?” he asked but I was already on it, playing with the truck's on-board navigation system and bringing up the small thermal imaging system that ran off little cameras near the grill.

“Ha-ha, look at that. Betcha Cadance doesn't have those,” I teased him as we began to roll out at a slower pace. As we continued to talk and chat, he began to mutter to me a warning.

“Hey, watch out... the road... STOP THE FUCKING TRUCK!” he yelled, myself slamming the brakes in response. As we came to an abrupt stop, I lurched forwards from the momentum before coming crashing back into my seat from the stop.

The thermal image display picked up a small pony just a few yards away. “The hell is somepony doing...” I trailed off as I realized Evan was no longer with me. “Fucking dick... leaves me to do everything...” I cursed as I quickly stepped out of the truck. “HELLO! ANYPONY OUT THERE?!” I screamed, already knowing the answer but wanting a feel for who it was.

A weak cry for help had me rushing towards them but I had to call a second time to actually find them in the storm. 'FUCK... I should've driven closer...' I cursed myself but finally arrived to the filly's aid.

Sliding down beside her, I scooped her up. She was dressed for incriminate weather, I'd give her that, but this was far worse than just a crumby snow storm. It was the storm of all storms. “What are you doing out here?!” I asked aloud, over the sound of the blistering storm. The harsh blizzardy winds nearly froze my face solid.

She had barely enough strength to answer me but I couldn't quite make out what she was saying over the storm. I shrugged it off and figured I'd ask once we got home. I turned to go but my stomach sank. I couldn't see my truck, couldn't see the headlights... hell, my footprints had even been covered by the snow.

With the blistering winds I couldn't even hear my truck running, and that was saying a lot because the 7.3 turbo makes no effort to be silent, even when at an idle. I cursed myself mentally. The one time I decide to be heroic and save a pony from the blizzard and I find myself lost.

I even started to smell a burning sooty smell. 'Probably death coming for... wait... burning soot?' I thought to myself and took a more vivid sniff of the air. The sound of the wind overcame my sense of hearing, the sheer amount of snow in the blizzard had overcome my sight. But smell... snow didn't smell like anything... but an idling diesel truck reeked of burning fuel.

I continued the smell until I found myself back to my truck. “Yes! Oh yeah, plus one for me!” I stated as I walked around to the driver door and opened her up. In the few moments I had been gone, the truck had become slightly coated in snow, with the exception of the windshield.

Setting the filly in the passenger seat, I shut the door and put the truck into the autopilot setting. “Home,” I ordered the truck, Juggernaut immediately shifting into drive and heading off towards the estate.

I quickly blasted the heat in the truck to it's maximum setting as I started pulling off the shivering filly's wet and frozen clothing. “What were you doing out there kid?” I asked curiously, tossing aside her scarf and boots as I began to undress her.

“Tr-trying t-to... to sur-surpr-” she stuttered through shivers and her voice hit me like a freight train

“Scootaloo?” I asked as I pulled off her balaclava. Her nose was runny and her cheeks were frilly pink but true to my guess, it was the small pegasus filly. “Sweet Celestia... are you crazy?!” I gasped as I quickly stripped off the rest of her winter clothing.

“I-I'm so-sorry... I was-” I cut her short, putting a finger to her mouth.

“Sssh, don't worry about it. We'll talk later...” I trailed off as I realized her body was still damp and cold. 'Son of a bitch!' I thought as I pulled off my shirt and used it like a towel as best I could.

The heat in the truck started to rise and get pretty steamy but she still continued to shiver. Taking my duster coat, I put it over her body like a blanket and tucked her in for the time being. “Keep that on. Don't take it off until we get home, okay?” I told her, to which she nodded then sneezed, snot going all over the oilskin fabric of my coat.

I closed my eye and did my best not to get frustrated as Evan's voice spoke up. 'That's very kind of you, Derreck,' he told me, which was like rubbing salt into some kind of wound I had no idea I had.

Finally we arrived home and I had Juggernaut pull up right to the door. Cradling Scootaloo in my arms, I rushed through the front door where Alfred went to greet me but I pushed right past him and made my way down to the furnace room.

I heard Alfred call out to me but I didn't bother answering. Racing into the furnace room, I settled Scootaloo on the floor where she sneezed again and looked to me, her cheeks finally starting to gain back their color.

I let out a relieved exhale as Lassie came racing in after me. “Yo, what's going on?! Alfred just got all frumpy that there's snow tracked all through the... woah...” she trailed off in silence as she saw Scootaloo wrapped up in my duster.

“You mind getting some blankets or something?” I asked her to which she nodded and quickly departed. I rubbed up and down the filly's back as we sat by the furnace, her cold symptoms slowly leaving as Lassie returned with some comforters.

I wrapped Scootaloo up and Lassie nestled up against her to further warm her body like a truly loving dog does. Scootaloo finally managed the strength to say something proper. “Thank you,” she whispered to which I patted her head.

“Hey, no problem kiddo. Any time, any time,” I assured her and she sniffled a bit.

“I was just trying to-” before she could finish, Alfred's voice cut in.

“Sir... was it really necessary to trudge all that snow through the... oh my...” his tone of voice changed as he saw the filly bundled up in all the blankets. “Shall I put on a pot of hot tea and perhaps some warm noodle soup?” he asked to which I nodded and gave him a thumbs up.

As a short time passed, another voice entered the room, but was accompanied by two ponies, not just one. “Derreck?” I heard Moon's voice ask. I turned to see both her and Trixie enter the room.

“Alfred said something about sickness. I do hope you're not... oh...” she hushed herself as she spotted Scootaloo and came to take a seat with us. Upon seeing her, Scootaloo nearly screamed, but I put my hand over her mouth.

“Relax Scoots, RELAX! She's not bad,” I assured her, the filly shaking feverishly in my arms.

“B-but she... she's Nightmare Moon!” she gasped and I nodded.

“Yeah, but she's not bad... trust me, okay?” I told her. It took a moment but Scootaloo eventually calmed, even if she was still a little cautious of the mare. Trixie took a seat beside me and nudged me.

Looking over, she asked a rather poorly timed question. “Did you pick Trixie up her eggnog?” she asked, nearly making me groan. Of all the times she could ask.

“Uhh... it uhh... was sold out,” I stated and her face nearly went into a pout.

“B-b-but y-you said you would... pick Trixie up eggnog,” she whined and I sighed.

“Shit happens...” I trailed off as I realized I was in the presence of a filly and would have to watch my language. “Sorry. But I can always make some,” I offered but she just pouted about it.

“It's not the same,” she whined, making me roll my eye. I figured it would've went worse had I said I gave it away... or told her that I gave the original carton to Flim and Flam...

Lassie nudged Scootaloo and asked the question I had been wondering since the beginning. “So kid... what made yah try and brave that wild snow storm?” my canine friend asked and Scootaloo sighed.

“It wasn't supposed to snow this bad... and I told Rainbow Dash I wouldn't be able to spend Hearth's Warming with her because I had other things to do, and I wanted to surprise her but... I got lost when the storm hit and... well that's when you found me...” Scootaloo said shyly, looking to me.

Trixie spoke up in a lecturing tone. “Well, you're very lucky he did find you. You could've-” I cut Trixie short.

“Ah screw it kid. You live and learn right. Today's lesson learned gives you more experience for tomorrow... or whatever the saying is. All that matters is that we're all here on the holiday right?” I asked and she half-nodded just as Alfred came in.

“Sir, I prepared you... oh... well, I prepared yourself and the filly a dish of warm noodle soup but... shall I prepare more for everypony?” he asked, Trixie's stomach grumbling being his answer.

“Than I shall get to it at once sir,” he stated as he trotted off. Seeing as how Scootaloo was feeling better now, and no longer in threat of hypothermia, I shed the comforter off her and led her upstairs.

“Wow...” she commented as we walked through the mansion. “This place is so cool...” She was absolutely mesmerized by the place as we made our way to the dinning room. True to his word, Alfred had prepared some tea and noodle soup, which was set out properly for us.

“How did you ever afford this place? It's so awesome. It's even better than the Canterlot Castle!” she chimed, probably a bit of an exaggeration. We took our seats at the rather massive table that stretched quite a ways.

Lassie sat and tapped her paws as she waited, Nightmare sitting next to me and Trixie sitting closer to Lassie. Looking to me, my dog asked a rather basic question. “You gonna eat that?” she asked, motioning to my soup. I slid it over to her and she quickly licked her chops and plowed her face into the bowl, slurping it up and making a mess.

Scootaloo laughed and giggled as Lassie made a rather foalish display. Turning her head up, and with a noodle strangling from the side of her mouth, she spoke. “Wha?” she asked with a mouthful of noodles, making Scootaloo giggle further.

“You're making a mess,” she laughed and Lassie wiggled her paws.

“No thumbs,” came her excuse. I pointed to Scootaloo whom was using her hooves that, evidently enough, had no thumbs. In the moments following, Alfred brought over several more bowls of noodles and cups of tea.

As he set them out for us, he was particularly disdainful towards the mess Lassie had made. “Hey Moony,” Lassie called over to Nightmare whom was just about to take her first spoonful. “Last one to finish takes the blame for the mess?” she challenged, a grin coming across both their faces as the duo spoke out in unison.

“THREETWOONEGO!” their mouths raced before their faces dunked into the bowls and made a considerable mess. Lifting their heads, they both looked at each other and began a foalish argument over who won.

Stopping for a moment, they looked to Scootaloo and Lassie spoke first. “Hey kid, you seen it with your own eyes. Tell Moony over there that I totally dusted her,” she laughed, Nightmare cutting in.

“Oh please, even a blind pony could've seen I won by at least a second, if not two,” she remarked. Scootaloo blinked before swallowing her spoonful.

“Uhm... I think it was a tie,” she mentioned the two challengers looking to each other and speaking.

“Told you so!...” they paused for a moment and looked back. “A tie?!” they both asked and Scootaloo nodded. Lassie looked to Nightmare and Nightmare to her.

Lassie was the first to speak. “I demand a rematch!” she challenged and Nightmare Moon licked her pretty lips.

“And I declare it... you're going down, dog,” she accepted the challenge playfully. Alfred leaned down to me.

“Sir, ever since you've been gone, Lassie has taught the others terrible manners...” he informed me and I perked a brow.

“I can see that...” I looked to the others whom looked back to me. A smirk came across my face and I myself plunged my face into my bowl of soup noodles and made a mess across the table.

Lifting my head, I slurped back the few noodles I actually managed to eat during the mess. Lassie and Nightmare both cackled in laughter, Trixie and Scootaloo soon joining in as well at the expense of Alfred's displeasure. Lassie spoke up in a cackling manner. “Forget the rematch, Derreck takes first place!” she laughed, seeing the most unimpressed facial expression of Alfred.

“Indeed...” he commented before slowly trotting away. We all shared a chuckle before I patted Scootaloo on the back.

“So?” I asked her, Scootaloo looking to me. “Feel better?” I asked and she nodded silently. “That's good,” I replied subtly. I looked over to Trixie and sighed. “Sorry for not picking up your eggnog. It just... slipped my mind earlier and then was sold out,” I stated and Trixie merely nodded.

“Trixie doesn't really mind. She just wishes she had eggnog. Besides, we can make it like you suggested.” She gave me a nod and I rubbed my chin.

“You know Trix... that ain't a bad idea, not a bad idea at all,” I replied with a further rub of my chin. “We'll need... milk... and some eggs... cinnamon... and-” Lassie cut me short.

“So what the hay are we waiting for?! Let's make this stuff!” she said aloud. Getting up from our seats, we all made our way to the kitchen and began to rummage around, finding what we figured we'd need to make eggnog.

As we began to throw stuff together in a blender, Scootaloo sighed rather... depressingly. I nudged her as I reached up high for the cinnamon. “Hey kid, why the long face?” I asked and she shrugged.

“I dunno... I mean, don't get me wrong, this is great but...” she trailed off.

“But?...” I asked.

“Well... I was super excited to surprise Rainbow Dash. She didn't have anything planed tonight either. Tomorrow she's going to see friends but I was gonna surprise her and spend Hearth's Warming Eve with her and wake up in the morning and we were gonna make pancakes and...” she trailed off, her hopes and dreams seemingly defeated.

Upon hearing it, my rather upbeat mood seemed to deflate as well, myself rubbing some eye snot from my eyelid. “Hmm... well that's pretty crumby...” I stated and she nodded with a sigh.

“I just wish she could be here...” she mentioned, and with that, Evan's voice nudged me.

'Come on, for the kid?' he asked and I thought back at him.

'And what am I supposed to do? Just go foalnap Rainbow Dash?' I snapped back and he snickered in my head.

'Possibly,' he giggled and my brow rose upon thinking those words...

“Hey kid...” I trailed off and a wide smile came across my face before I went expressionless. “Ah'll be back,” I told her in the perfect delivery. Pressing my right index and middle finger to my forehead, I focused hard, searching across all Equestria... sensing... feeling. I felt everything. Every tree, every dog, cat, cow, stallion and...

'Found her-' My mind went blank for just a moment...

* * *

I found myself standing on clouds, along with a scream that echoed in the cloud home just as I began to fall through the would-be floor. I found the power to keep myself afloat, a powerful aura coating my body and letting me stay airborne as I looked to Dash, who wrapped a towel around her body.

“YOU EVER HEAR OF KNOCKING?!” she nearly screamed and I rolled my eyes as I flew over and grabbed the still wet mare, damp from her shower... heh, with her hair like that, she was pretty cute.

“Don't let go,” I told her but she didn't even manage a squeak before both our minds went white with emptiness...

* * *

We fell to the nice hardwood floor of the kitchen, the others gasping as I heard Scootaloo's last few words get cut off by our sudden arrival. “And then he just dissa-” They all were looking down on Dash and I as we lay on the floor, Dash partially covered in her bath towel.

“DASH!” Scootaloo squeaked as she rushed over and nearly jumped on the mare who let out an 'OOMPH' as the filly landed on her. As Scootaloo snuggled into her, Dash rose a brow.

“Wha... what's going... going on?” Dash asked as the others all looked to her. She unfortuantely spotted Nightmare Moon and quickly rose into a defensive stance, the towel falling from her body as she tucked Scootaloo behind her.

“NIGHTMARE MOON!” she nearly snarled, to which my lover to a step back, and I stepped between them.

“Woah-ho, wait! Hold on! Brakes!” I tried to stop any further aggression.

“WHAT?! Are you crazy?! Do you know who she-” she was cut off by Scootaloo whom was tugging on her side.

“No, really Dash. Nightmare Moon is really, really, REALLY, nice. She's teaching me how to make eggnog and even promised to help me make... what was it called?” she asked curiously.

Nightmare Moon's answer was something that had even me perking a brow. “Croquembouche,” she told Scootaloo.

“Yeah, that. It looks really good,” the young filly answered, having Dash lower her guard slightly and ask the same thing I was wondering.

“What's that?” Dash asked curiously.

“It's a secret!” Scootaloo replied, her and Nightmare giggling together like little fillies. Well... that was a first that I'd seen Nightmare act like this. Dash grabbed her towel and wrapped it over herself yet again.

“Ahem... yeah well... hey, how'd you even get here?” Dash asked Scootaloo who quickly told the tale of how she was trying to surprise Dash but got stuck in the snowstorm and how I... as she told it, rescued her. Dash, upon hearing this, grabbed the filly and hugged her tight.

“Scootaloo... oh thank Goddess you're alright... kid, you don't have to surprise me,” she said truthfully but that didn't deter the young filly's attitude one bit. Setting her down, Dash looked to me. “Thank you... but uhh, next time you decide to foalnap me out of my house, can you wait until I'm done drying off?” she asked, making me laugh quietly to myself.

“Sure thing Dash... washroom's down the hallway and to the right... when you get back... we could use some help making eggnog,” I offered, Dash smirking to herself.

“Why didn't you just buy some?” she replied, Trixie butting in before I could even speak.

“That's what Trixie said, but he waited until the last minute and it was sold out!” she complained, making Dash laugh as she trotted away. Our group went back to trying to make the eggnog, every batch seeming to get closer, or further, away from tasting like proper eggnog.

As Dash came back we started to make a bit of a mess... a little bit more than a mess, but we were all giggling and having fun none the less. After yet another batch of taste testing, Trixie spat in disgust. “Blech... this is the worst batch yet... don't you have a cookbook?” she asked and I shook my head. “I should've gotten you that for Hearth's Warming instead... who in Equestria doesn't have a cookbook?” she asked, so disgruntled she didn't refer to herself in third person.

“Y-you... got me something for Hearth's Warming?” I asked, feeling a little tender about it.

“Well of course. You're so very special to me, I had to get you something,” she stated, making me squirm a bit due to the fact I hadn't actually gotten anything for her, or anypony else for that matter.

Lassie cut in. “Yeah, me too. But Alfred wouldn't let us bring in a tree to put everything under because... ohhhh, it would make such a mess!” she quipped in a mocking tone, to which I heard Alfred's voice cut in.

“Actually, that's not how I put it... I do believe my exact words were that it would shed pine needles everywhere... and that it could just as easily be put in the garage instead,” he quoted his words and Lassie grunted.

“Dude... it's cold there, and it's supposed to be in the living room,” she quipped and he nodded.

“Yes, well... it would make too much of a mess... unless sir approves,” he looked to me and I just shrugged and looked out the window, only to see it was still storming outside.

“Uhh... maybe we'll get a tree later,” I mused the idea, not wanting to go outside and get cold again. Scootaloo stepped forwards and spoke to Alfred.

“Excuse me, Alfred, do you know how to make eggnog?” she asked in an innocent tone and he perked a brow. “You know, like the festive kind?” she asked. We all looked to her as she stood before the butler whose lips twitched just slightly before he spoke.

“Well... it just so happens that I do. Why might you ask?” he asked her and she handed him a glass of our latest batch.

“What's wrong with ours? We keep getting it wrong,” she asked him. Alfred took the glass and sipped it gingerly, shuddering slightly as he spat to the side.

“Blech,” he nearly choked before wiping his lip, handing the glass back and speaking. “It requires less cinnamon... add a little vanilla, probably no more than a tablespoons worth, and a bit of nutmeg... and that should make a sufficient blend of eggnog,” he informed us.

We went to it, following his instructions as we blended a hefty batch of eggnog, enough so that we would all have at least one full glass of it. Lassie dipped a paw digit into the blender of eggnog then licked her digit and nodded. “Oh yeah... he's bang on!” she chimed and we poured ourselves all a glass, myself offering Alfred a glass.

“Oh no, please sir I'm flattered but... I prefer mine with a bit of extra... spice, if you will,” he mentioned and I perked a brow, motioning to the others whom all had their glasses. “Oh I suppose just a single glass wouldn't hurt.” He took his glass and we all rose to a toast.

Lassie made it for us. “Here's to Alfred, best damn butler slash cook slash maid in Equestria,” she proposed, adding the maid part in just to poke at him but still making Alfred blush slightly regardless.

“Hay... I'll drink to that,” I said, the others nodding and with it, all tipped back our drinks. “Damn... not bad... hey, Lassie's onto something. If you ain't the best, it's a damn close call,” I commented, Alfred chuckling.

“Well sir... I do take pride in my work... if you would please though, try not to make too much of a mess please.” And with that he was trotting off, probably to go iron a suit or something butler-ish.

I shrugged and made my way to the living room, figuring I'd kick my feet up for a while. Lassie followed me but Nightmare Moon, Scootaloo and Dash stayed in the kitchen to make... whatever she called it.

I flopped on the lazycolt recliner and tilted it back, pulling off my socks and letting out a sigh. Lassie curled up by my feet and Trixie meanwhile turned on the radio, which was playing some holiday music. I was usually pretty grumpy about listening to that crap, but I'd tolerate it for this evening... it was the time of season after all.

As I laid there, I started to doze off, the warm fuzzly feeling starting to come over me before I was suddenly woken by something warm, wet and soft pressing to my cheek, waking me from my near slumber.

“Uhh! Huh, what?” I asked, partially in a daze. Scootaloo was holding a tray of... something, and Nightmare Moon was the one whom kissed me.

“Surprise. Croquembouche,” Nightmare Moon announced as Scootaloo presented the treat to everypony. I shook my head in slight confusion but Dash's words snapped me back into reality.

“They're actually pretty good, you should try one,” she suggested to me. I decided to take one. It was... good, I'd give it that. It was coated in caramel or something there of and the balls were a pastry of some kind. As good as it was, it wasn't what I was in the mood for.

“That's actually really good,” I told her, to which Scootaloo offered another. “Oh no... no more for me... I kinda want a coffee,” I said with a tired exhale as I stood up and drowsily walked towards the kitchen.

“Me too!” Lassie chimed out. I looked back and sighed. That was the last thing I needed right now. A hyper-active Lassie.

“Yeah, I'll take one too, if you don't mind,” Dash added in. I walked over to the cupboards and opened them up then looked back to Scootaloo.

“We're gonna have some coffee kid, you want something to drink? Milk?... I dunno, I got... you want... milk?” I offered.

“Coffee's fine,” she said in a smooth voice.

“I dunno kid. This is espresso, you know?” I said as I pulled out the can of premium espresso coffee. “This is like coffee-zilla,” I stated, knowing it would get her wired beyond belief and have her bouncing off the walls.

“Coffee's fine,” she told me and I rose a challenging brow, to which she whined back. “What?! I drink it! I'm cool like you and Dash,” she commented and I sighed with a shrug.

“Allll-right,” I stated as I grabbed some sugar and a tin of hot-chocolate mix.

Walking over to the stove top, I brought a kettle of water to boil and pulled out some cream. Pouring several cups of espresso, I added cream to them, then made one cup of hot-chocolate and added a slight bit of sugar before putting everything away and walking back out with the beverages.

I handed out all the coffee and gave Scootaloo her hot-chocolate which she believed to be coffee. Dash looked to me with a risen brow and slightly worried look, knowing what a young filly on espresso would be like. I cupped my hand beside my mouth as though to blow on my coffee but secretly did it to hide my mouthed words from Scoots as I informed Dash of the reality.

'Hot-chocolate,' I mouthed silently and she smiled with a knowing nod. Our group sat there and sipped our beverages for a while, just enjoying the company. Trixie was the first to yawn, quickly finishing her drink.

“Well... I'm off to bed,” she said through another yawn, and with that was off. Lassie was next to yawn and didn't really say anything as she curled up at my feet.

Scootaloo yawned next and looked to Dash and I. “Can you tuck me in?” she asked us both and I swallowed. For a moment I was hesitant but figured there was no harm in doing so, seeing as how I'd have to show them a spare room anyway.

“Sure, come on... you can have one of the guest rooms,” I said as I sat up with a tired groan. I showed them to a room with two beds, one for Scootaloo and one for Dash, figuring they could share a room as opposed to separating them.

Scootaloo hopped into bed and Dash tucked her in, rubbing her cheek and wishing her a good night's sleep before kissing her forehead. The filly looked to me next and I just blinked blankly. “Will you kiss me goodnight too?” she asked and I nearly went pale faced.

“Uhh... me?” I asked and she nodded. “L-l-like... I mean... really? You want me to kiss you goodnight?” I asked and she nodded again. "W-well I... I guess if you really want me too...” I trailed off, leaned down and kissed her forehead. “Night kid... sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite... well, I mean... we don't have bed bugs cause Alfred... yeah...” I coughed timidly, not having much experience in this field, to which Scootaloo nodded with a giggle and snuggled into her blanket.

I stood up and made for the door, to which Dash followed. “Hey,” she called to me and I turned. “Listen... thank for... foalnapping me... it means a lot to her for us be together on the holidays... and she really likes you, I can see it in her eyes.” I nodded and scratched my head.

“Uhh... yeah, I... I try,” I told her and Dash nodded again.

“I just thought you should know, I think... I think you would've made a pretty good dad,” she told me and I smiled softly. I stepped back and gave her a nod after which she shut the door to their room and I wandered back into the living room, relaxing onto my chair. I felt all... crumby and miserable... it was because of this warm fuzzy feeling I was getting on the inside.

The others were all passed out, Trixie had left to her own room, Nightmare on the other hand had passed out on a nearby couch and Lassie was at the base of the lazycolt where I soon resided and retrieved my cup of coffee. 'Ugh... what a holiday...' I groaned inwardly...

* * *

I awoke with a chill at my feet, making me shiver softly and wake up. Looking around, I saw that all the lights were out, no longer coating everything in that warm, fuzzy, cherishable feeling.

Instead everything was coated in darkness, with small bits of dust fluttering through the hallways, almost glowing. The darkness wasn't black like usual. The winter snow had given the darkness a blue tint. I stood up and looked around, shivering again as I noticed it was fairly cold considering we had a furnace. 'Damn... I wonder if Alfred accidentally turned off the furnace?' I wondered.

As I began to walk towards the staircase, I glanced past the window and took note it wasn't snowing as bad anymore, barely at all actually. Just a few stray flakes fluttered down to the ground.

I perked a brow. Maybe I didn't get anypony anything for Christmas, err... Hearth's Warming, but maybe I could at least get them a tree. 'A stupid fuckin' tree,' I thought begrudgingly as I slipped on my boots and duster coat.

Slipping into the garage I grabbed an ax and some gloves before sneaking out to Juggernaut. 'They'll probably wake up from the engine but... maybe not,' I thought as I keyed the ignition, the truck turning over before promptly rumbling to life.

“Okay Juggernaut... nice and quiet,” I whispered, as though it would make a difference. I slipped the battle truck into gear and we puttered away and off the estate property, into the depths of the Everfree Forest.

As I cruised along through the snow, I kept cursing silently to myself. “This is such a stupid idea... who the fuck wants a tree... a cock suckin' stupid tree...”

As I began cursing the holiday however, the storm returned, only making me curse louder. “OH FOR FUCK SAKES! HURRAY! AS IF THIS DAY COULDN'T GET ANY MORE FUCKED!” I roared out, the power of the wind nearly rocking the truck. “FUCK YOU TOO, YOU STUPID FUCKING STORM! GO FUCK YOURSELF!” I roared.

As I drove along I looked from side to side of the trail, trying to find an appropriately sized tree. Pretty soon the storm got blisteringly miserable and I decided to just get out and chose a random tree. “Fuck pretty, fuck perfect, fuck everything! They just get a Charlie Brown tree!” I roared as I stepped out, grabbing an energy bar of the dash for the way. I left the truck running with the door open, figuring I wouldn't be long.

Walking over to the side of the trail, I kept one arm across my face, shielding me from the blustering wind. I kept silently cursing the weather in general but the odd time I dropped an F-bomb about the holiday.

As I neared what I believed to be the edge of the trail, I slipped and suddenly began to tumble down a step slope, rolling and bouncing as I fell, swearing vividly the whole way down. As I finally hit the bottom, I let out one loud, prolonged swear that echoed into the distance.

At this point I was cold, wet, freezing and just cursing myself for ever conceiving this idea. Standing up, I retrieved my ax with my fumblingly cold hands. Any longer and I was guaranteed frostbite and hypothermia.

I began to stagger through the knee-high snow, searching painfully for a stupid tree. The wind started to pick up even more and I heard a whistling howl. Looking up to the sky, through all the snowfall and gusting winds, I saw the moon covered by dark storm clouds that looked more like thunderclouds than that of winter clouds. Blue streaks of lightning flashed across the sky, making me curse even more... next it'd start fucking raining, my luck.

“I didn't think thunder could even exist in winter time,” I commented as I trudged on in the utter darkness, cursing even louder now.

My legs started to go numb and frost started to grow on my duster. “Holy fuck... cock-suckin' ASSHOLES!” I yelled out to nopony in particular, and swearing about nopony... just swearing for the sake of swearing.

The whistling howl returned and I looked to the sky where massive ghostly horses flew above me like vultures. I gave them the finger and cursed them. “Awww fuck you! And fuck me! AND FUCK THIS HOLIDAY!” I roared, the flying beasts' eyes flashing at me as they all began to twirl around, creating a whirlwind.

'Oh shit...' I thought as my stomach sank. I decided it was time to high-tail it, but as I went to run I realized that my trail was gone. 'Son of a bitch!' I thought quietly as I took off in a random direction, the creatures, Windigos I think they were called, chasing after me.

Regardless of how fast I ran, the fuckers could fly and I was stuck trudging through knee high snow. They chased after me like crazed beasts, screeching and howling into the wind. As I scurried down a path, one flew low and struck me hard in the back, knocking me face first into the frigid snow.

Forcing myself back up, I wiped the snow from my face but nearly gasped as I found myself face to face... face to grill, with Juggernaut, my stomach sinking further. She wasn't running anymore, and was frozen over with ice. Icicles ran off her grill and frost coated all the metal parts.

I scurried and took a look to the inside of the truck, only to be mortified as the frost had even gotten to the inside. 'HOW THE FUCK DID THAT HAPPEN?! I wasn't even gone five fuckin' minutes!' I thought furiously.

Before I could even take another step, another Windigo tackled me, launching me back down the steep slope. Even through all the tumbling and crashing into tree trunks on the way down, I kept my grip tight on the ax, knowing it was my one weapon I had.

Coming to a fluffy stop, I immediately stood up and gave them the finger. “Ahhh fuck you, you pansy shits! COME AT ME FAGGOTS!” I nagged them on, one Windigo taking the bait and swooshing down. I stepped back and timed it just perfectly.

Just as it got close I swung the ax into its head, planning to use the tree next to it as the chopping block. However, much to my successful timing, the ax seemed to just glide right through the damn thing, like the Windigo was really just a ghost.

It tackled itself into me, dragging me into the ground and breathing on me. Its breath was like liquid nitrogen, freezing the side of my face upon contact. I tried to bring my arm up in defense but it to was frozen, even through the thick oilskin.

My mind raced but I finally came upon an idea, an idea that had slipped my mind due to my frustration and anger. My right fist clenched, three shiny metallic blades emerging from between my knuckles. I drove my fist hard into the side of its head and this time, it didn't go right through like it was just a ghost. The blades drove deep into its skull and the beast squealed and howled before erupting into a fume of soft fluffy snow.

I stood up, the other two looking to me with patronizing glares. I returned the glare as my fists tightened and I felt something growing between them... a handle... one that was expertly crafted... and soon it started to gain in weight.

The blade of blades... the ultimate mythic sword... starting from the hilt, The Shadow Blade began to materialize in my grasp, emerging to be longer than I was tall. The blade itself glowed dark blue, and a flaming aura was lit off the blade, with a heat so intense it warmed my body. the blade almost hummed in my hands as I gripped it tight.

I took a daring step back and the beasts darted down towards me. A determined expression came about my face as I brought the mighty blade to bear in front of me, letting the glowing blade illuminate my face through all the darkness.

Taking a slight crouch, I sprang up at them. The clash was brief, precise and took instance faster than one could blink. I landed in a crouched position, the sword vanishing from my grip as I landed. The Windigos landed behind me and we were all still for a brief moment that seemed to drag out for hours before they both collapsed into a plume of snow.

I dragged myself to my feet and began to stumble along, cursing silently as my face remained numb, along with my left arm. Surprisingly enough, my healing factor wasn't doing anything at the moment to heal the injuries, or if it was, it didn't feel like it.

Tall trees surrounded me, ones that reached way high and had no branches until the very top. They seemed to surround me like some kinda damn nightmare, slowly closing in on me.

Little bits of snow drizzled down through the darkness. Everything was pitched an almost dark blue tint, and the trees cast long ominous shadows across the flat, snow covered ground. As I continued along, I heard a plea for help. My ears perked and again I heard it. I rushed along until I found a figure, cloaked in some kinda raggedy burlap clothing.

“Please... my leg,” she, judging by her voice, whimpered.

“Celestia... who the hay is out on a night like this... I thought I was the only stupid one,” I mumbled and she whispered again for my help. “Okay, okay, relax. I'm gonna help yah.” I examined her body briefly and discerned she wasn't going to bleed to death or be put in critical condition if I lifted her.

Picking her up over my shoulders, I opted to teleport out of this shithole. I put my fingers to my forehead like always and focused... but couldn't come up with anything. It was like everything else was just... gone...

'Shit...' I quietly swore as I began to walk away with the injured mare on my shoulders. “So... what's your name?” I asked, trying to spike conversation.

“Uhh... most ponies just call me Snow,” she told me and I looked back to her. Her fur was white and her mane a matching color.

“Suits you,” I mentioned honestly as I neared a patch of brush that led into a clearing. Stepping out into the clearing, I looked around. We were both undoubtedly cold, hungry, and tired.

“Okay... okay hold on,” I said as I leaned her up against a tree. My claws popped out, making her jump and I quickly went to work on some of the drier branches of brush, stacking up a small pile in a suitable place for a fire. Not too close to the tree to risk wildfire, but not far enough away that we didn't have cover from the elements.

I stripped off some birch bark and placed it near the base. With all claws extended, I clanged them together, a skew of sparks coming off them and lighting the small pit of branches ablaze.

“Oh yeah! What up?! That's right...” I trailed off as I tossed a few more branches on to keep it going.

Snow, as she called herself, scooched closer to the warmth of the fire, pulling her hood back and revealing her facial features in full. She was a unicorn. I rubbed my chin as vague memories of her surfaced. “I... recall seeing you... once... before, somewhere,” I made note and she shrugged.

“I don't know. Perhaps. I'm a rather forgettable pony,” she told me and I rose a brow. “But you... I hear you are a legend... The Punisher,” she said, myself fist pumping the air.

“YES! Finally,” I exclaimed, Snow giving me a strange look. “You don't know how long I've wanted somepony to call me that... pretty awesome,” I said as I leaned back, the fire crackling with warmth.

We sat there for a while, myself throwing the odd branch on to keep the fire hot and continuous. Sitting in silence soon proved a bore and I tried to spike up conversation. “So... family?” I asked but she shook her head.

“You?” she asked back.

I tapped the side of my head. “He keeps me in the boundaries of sanity... got a few folks back home too... came out to get them a tree for Hearth's Warming,” I mentioned and she perked a brow.

“I heard somepony in the forest... cursing the holiday... rather vividly. Was that by chance... you?” she asked curiously and I sighed.

“Yeah but... I don't really hate the holidays. I was just kinda frustrated that I was trying to do something nice and everything kept kinda... you know?” I asked and she merely licked her lips.

“Well... I'm not so sure. You should watch what you say, even when alone. Somepony could hear it and mistake it for something else.” She had a point, I'd give her that, but not much else.

We continued to sit there and I heard her stomach grumble while she licked her lips. “Hungry?” I asked and she nodded. “Yeah... me too... me too,” I told her, rubbing my hands together near the fire. "Wish I hadn't have wasted all that noodle soup earlier," I said aloud as I rubbed my stomach.

“Do you have anything to eat?” she asked and I shook my head. “Nothing at all?” she asked and I rose a brow.

“Well... if you want I could cut a piece of my arm off and cook it... it'll grow back so...” I offered honestly, and rather cynically. She nearly cringed at the offer. “Well... offer stands. Truth be told, if I have to stay out here much longer, I might just do it,” I joked with a laugh, Snow cringing further. "I'm joking, of course."

I groaned as my stomach rumbled and I thought back on those damn... whatevers, that Nightmare Moon and Scootaloo had made... what I'd give for one of those... and all that soup we splashed... hell, I might even consider one of those nasty energy bars in my truc-

“The energy bar!” I gasped as I stood up and fished through my coat. Snow looked to me with a risen brow as I found it in one of my duster coat pockets. “AHHH-HAAAA!” I announced and rose a brow as I looked to her. “Still hungry?” I asked and she nodded quickly.

I tossed her over the bar to which she caught graciously and began to peel open as I took my seat. “Aren't you going to have one as well?” she asked but I shook my head.

“Nah. That was the only one. Took it for when I went out to cut down a tree for Hearth's Warming... all yours,” I told her and she looked to the bar then back to me.

“I'll split it with you,” she offered but I shook my head.

“Nah kid, you have it. You look like you need it more than me... besides, I'd rather eat part of my arm than one of those, yech!” I joked with a wink. She persisted with the offer but I instead reached over and gently pushed the energy bar towards her. “Seriously, I can live without it. Those things are disgusting... but you look like you need it.”

She looked to me with genuine eyes and gave me thanks before indulging in the bar. “If only everything could be that easy... but noooo, go to get a Hearth's Warming tree? Get lost out in the Everfree, crazy ass bird horses attack me, my truck gets frozen, I get stranded and now... well, this part isn't so bad, me and you, eh?” I asked and she nodded.

“You went out in the middle of the night just to get a tree for your loved ones?” she asked and I nodded. “That's kind of you,” she mentioned and I rolled my eye. Everypony kept saying I was kind. I really wasn't...

We sat for a while longer and the feeling to my arm and face started to return. Snow looked to me with a curious look. “I hear you... uhh... lay, a lot of mares,” she mentioned and I perked a brow.

“I might, why?” I asked and her answer was one that threw me way off. I was kinda half hoping she'd ask for a proverbial roll in the hay...

“Well, I also heard you were in a relationship... don't you think that's a little... less than faithful?” she asked and I shrugged.

“Yeah well... that's the kind of relationship she wants to lead, and I'm not one for arguing that,” I responded and she gave me a smart-assed look.

“Well what if she wanted something more... something a bit more faithful?” she asked and I shrugged.

“She'd ask,” I replied but she continued with the 'What ifs'.

“But what if perhaps she's waiting for you to say she's the only one you want?” she asked and I just dipped my head into my hands.

“Dude... dudette... I don't go to a therapist for a reason... please,” I pleaded with her and she stopped with a simple nod.

“I was just asking. I'm sorry for prodding but I'd just like to know... if she did ask you... out of the blue say, for you to be ever faithful to her... could you?” she asked and I nodded.

“Oh, yeah, of course. No doubt. I love Ni... her, more than anything,” I replied, figuring if I told her I was spooning with the legendary 'Mare in the moon' she might think I'm either nutty or terrifying.

I leaned back and laid down beside the fire, keeping toasty warm. “Okay Ms... Snow, how about you?” I asked but she shrugged as she too laid down.

“I live my life a free mare, traveling the world every year and bringing joy to others...” she trailed off and I rose a brow. That could mean a number of things. I pushed the thoughts aside as she spoke again. “Thank you for the energy bar. I know it wasn't much but it was your only piece of food, and in knowing that, I know you are true of heart,” she thanked me and I just groaned loudly.

“Ohhhh please, don't patronize me... just... just nod and say 'Thanks for the bar'... actually, not even that, those things are terrible,” I laughed and she just smiled.

“As you wish Mr. Parker. Sweet dreams,” she replied as we both curled up around the fire. As I began to drift into sleep, I wondered to myself.

'I never told her my actual name...'

* * *

I awoke with a gasp, jumping up and looking in all different directions. I was warm... dry...

I looked around and blinked. I was back in my mansion... I rushed over to the window and looked below. There, sitting out front where I had originally left her the day before, sat Juggernaut.

I scratched my head as memories from last night started to fade. 'Had it all been... just a dream?' I wondered to myself. Before I could even speak, a small filly ran into me from the side.

“Oh, you're the bestest ever!” Scootaloo chimed as Lassie plowed into me as well, followed by Trixie which finally knocked me over.

“GWAH! What?! What did I do?” I gasped as they all snuggled me.

Scootaloo pointed to the tree that sat in the living room with an assortment of presents beneath it. The tree itself was beautifully decorated. I blinked in disbelief but Lassie spoke before I could say anything. “Oh man, for a little while I thought we weren't gonna have one, but this is... PERFECT! Man, Alfred is gonna be like 'Bwahch, why did you have to make a mess, blech!'” she mocked the butler, whose voice soon picked up.

“I don't believe I sound like that at all, but... sir, did you really have to drag a tree inside?” he asked and I waved my hands like I had nothing to do with it. Lassie hit me playfully.

“Oh, give us a break. Who else would've brought it in? Hearth?” she asked and still I was left clueless as to how it ended up there. Scootaloo looked to Dash whom looked to me.

Speaking up, the filly asked the question most kids do on Hearth's Warming. “Can we open presents now?” she asked and Dash looked to her.

“W-well... I mean, the presents I got for you are back-” but Scootaloo cut her off.

“That's okay, Evan got presents for all of us, even you,” she said, calling me Evan instead of Derreck, which was fine, but only for her. Dash looked to me and I shook my head like I had no idea what she was talking about.

We all walked over but before I could really get a look at anything, Trixie levitated over a gift for me. “Here, Trixie figures you should open the first gift since you really brought home the spirit of the holiday,” she said, the others all nodding. I hated being the center of attention...

Taking a brief look, I saw it was from Trixie, or as she put it 'From: The Great and Powerful Trixie'. I opened up the gift, and pried open the box to find...

“It's a cape, just like Trixie's. Now we can have the matching pair!” she exclaimed. “The most great and powerful in all Equestria will have matching capes to show off their great and powerfulness,” she stated, only making me blink.

Scootaloo pulled on my leg and I looked down to her. She leaned up as though to whisper and I leaned down so she could tell me her secret. “I'm sorry but I didn't get you anything. I didn't know I'd see you,” she apologized but I just shrugged it off.

“Don't worry about it kid,” I assured her as Lassie began to shred one apart.

“Woah... aww, you're so thoughtful D. I love bones,” she said, holding up the bone and licking it in an almost sexual way. I just closed my eye, not wanting to think what she'd be doing with it later. Lassie opened another one then looked to Trixie. “Ohh... double trouble,” she said, holding up a second bone before cracking an innuendo. “If you guys all got me bones, I won't have enough places to put them.” I shuddered from the comment.

I sat back as they all started opening presents from one another, Scootaloo unwrapping hers that was from me... somehow. It was some heavy winter clothing and a... box?

“Oh cool,” she chimed as she showed off the box, which turned out to be a ready to build gingerbread house. “Can we all make it together later?” she asked, the others nodding in response.

Dash opened up the present I had supposedly gotten her and gasped. “Holy... no... way...” she looked to me wide eyed, then to the gift again. I had no idea what it was. “Are you serious? Is this for... it is... it can't be... but it is!” she exclaimed, standing up in unparalleled joy.

“A first generation Wonderbolts officer uniform... oh no way! IT'S EVEN MY SIZE!” she squealed like a filly on Hearth's Warming...

She looked to me in disbelief. “How did you... why did you... oh this is sooooo awesome!” she squeaked, flying into me at nearly mach speed and hugging me. I just scratched the back of my head as she bumbled out a thank you.

“Uhh... yeah, it was nothing,” I stated modestly, having no clue as to how it got there or where it even came from.

“You didn't? Oh you did? You liar!” Trixie squealed and tackled me over my chair, pinning Dash between us. “You said they were out of eggnog! I should've known!” she squealed before planting a wet kiss on my lips. I was a little shocked to say the least and when I finally managed to stand, I saw there was a small crate with six dairy bottles labeled 'Eggnog'.

I blinked in true disbelief but before I could really say anything, Nightmare handed me a present, one from her. I opened it up and looked at it. It was a checkered shirt, with a button-up front, chest pocket and collared neck.

“I thought you might need something more relaxitive for when you're hanging around home... I think it'd look good on you,” she said and I quickly pulled my old shirt off and slipped the new one one. Sure enough, it did look pretty decent... and kinda made me look like some kind of retired old stallion about to go golfing.

“Oh, oh, oh! Put the cape on too!” Trixie chimed. I did as suggested and slipped the cape on. Lassie rushed over with a small present and offered it to me, it was from her to me. Judging by the small shape and shaft-like appearance I didn't want to really know what it was, knowing her... personality.

Irregardless I opened it up to find a fine cylinder tube with a wonderful smelling cigar inside. “I always see you chewing that same old nasty cigar of yours and figured you might want a new one,” she laughed and I managed a chuckle as I slipped the fresh cigar into my mouth.

The taste alone was mind blowing. So exquisite and immaculate... my smile widdened. Lassie looked back to the tree and spotted another. “Hey... this one's for... Alfred?... gimme a sec... ahem...” she moved over to one side of the living room and knocked over a vase of flowers.

"Alfred! I knocked over a table and it's made a big mess! You should come and clean it!” she called out and I could hear the 'Clip-clop' of Alfred's casual trot as he slowly, and probably in a disgruntled way, came up to clean the mess.

“Ms. Lassie could you-” she presented him with the gift.

“Nah, forget the mess. Here, this is for you,” she said and he went wide eyed.

“A... a gift... for me? On Hearth's Warming... why I... I never... nopony ever gets me a... thank you,” he said as he slowly opened it and gasped as he revealed a fine suit coat to everypony. “Mr. Parker... you shouldn't have,” he nearly cried... and genuinely cried too. “It's... oh you really shouldn't have, this is so wonderful,” he said and I blinked. It just looked like a plain jane... suit coat.

“Uhh... what is it?” I asked and he gave me a dumb look.

“Oh please Mr. Parker... you know full well what it is... you really shouldn't have... oh this is...” he continued to ramble as he trotted away with the new suit, crying in happiness all the while. I looked to the others in confusion, a look which they returned. What was the big deal?

“Ideas?” I asked them but they all shook their heads. With that we were mostly out of presents, only stocking remained which were filled with goodies.

“Can we start making this?” Scootaloo asked, holding up her gingerbread house. The others all followed her to the kitchen, everypony except Nightmare and myself. I myself walked over towards the tree to finally inspect it and nearly tripped over a gift that was hidden under all the shredded wrapping paper.

Nightmare picked it up and looked to me. "You didn't have to get me anything. You being home for Hearth's Warming was enough,” she chimed and began to open it. I saw her legs threaten to give out as she looked to me. “Are you... are you serious?” she asked as she levitated out two nearly identical necklaces.

“What are they?” I asked. She gave me a smirk.

“You bought them and you act like you don't even know what these are,” she giggled to me and still I was puzzled. “They're promise necklaces... two lovers wear them when they want to be forever loyal to one another...” she placed one in my hands while the other around her own neck.

“The hooves on the amulet piece signify friendship, the crown represents loyalty and the heart...” she trailed off as she placed a kiss to my lips. “When the user wears it, the heart piece is to face towards the wearer's own heart, to signify the other is always in their heart and that they will forever remain loyal and faithful to them... are you saying... I'm the only mare you'd ever want?” she asked, turning her head to one side and bashing her eyes at me with a blush.

It was that one comment, the last phrase, that made me remember, and finally realize who was probably behind this... if she even truly existed. I nodded and slipped my necklace on. I stood before her and took her into an embrace. “You're the only mare I could ever want,” I told her honestly. We were about to kiss when a set of snowballs hit me and Nightmare.

“Ewww!” Lassie giggled with Scootaloo. “You two were about to kiss!” they giggled together, snickering as I frowned but the game was on for Nightmare. She quickly, and most joyfully, chased them out the door. I sighed... oh how the great and powerful had fallen...

I raced out the door, slipping my boots on as I went and chased them out to the front yard where a snowball fight had erupted. Dash and Scootaloo were hiding behind a fort. Lassie and Trixie had amassed some kind of contraption that was like an automatic snowball catapult while Nightmare and myself had just arrived.

The war was on and raging like wildfire. Just as I was getting ready to assault Scoots and Dash's base while Trixie and Lassie provided Moon and myself cover, I was hit in the head by something... different.

“Hey, snowballs only! No... newspapers?” I asked curiously as I looked at the wrapped up newspaper.

“SORRY!” cried out a voice from above. I looked up to see a grey pegasus slowly and most gracefully flutter down. “It slipped. I didn't mean to hit you with it,” she apologized before I took her into a hug.

“Hey Derpy, how are yah?” I asked. She shrugged. It was the first time ever that she hadn't crashed into me before meeting like this... but I suppose she had hit me with a newspaper so that was close enough.

“Okay, I'm not actually on duty, we have the day off but this is tomorrow's issue and I knew you'd just have to see it!” she exclaimed and we all gathered in as I looked at the headline. There was a goofy picture of me trying to wave my arms while at the grocery mart, with the captioned title 'Local charity hero!'

Dash plucked the paper out of my hands and began to read it aloud. “During Ponyville's local charity food drive to feed the less fortunate for the holiday, there came a most unexpected, but very welcome, donation from a passerby. The anonymous donor gave nearly four hundred bits worth of food to the charity before filling small Timothy's hat with over Twe... Twelve...” Dash dropped the paper and looked to me.

“You gave the local charity over twelve thousand bits?!” she nearly gasped and I just shrugged but Derpy grabbed me tight, hugging me lovingly.

“Isn't he so great? He's a real hero now!” she chimed to the others but I quickly shrugged it off.

“Oh come on, it was nothing. I'm not really a hero,” I said but Derpy would have none of it.

“Of course you are. Because of you, lots of less fortunate ponies can have a happy holiday this year. Lots of less fortunate colts and fillies can have presents, just look!” She grabbed the newspaper off the ground and reopened it, showing a picture of several ponies at the orphanage, overjoyed with presents in front of them. “That's because of you!” she said, making me feel all crumby inside... or maybe I wasn't feeling crumby but I didn't like the feeling I felt.

“Well... it's not like I-” but Derpy cut me short.

“You don't actually have to save a life to be a hero Evan. You don't have to defeat bad guys or save the entire world,” she said, addressing me by the wrong name but I'd let it slide, for her. “You just have to make a difference in somepony's life.” I felt the feeling inside me worsen further.

“Okay... well, I'm wet and cold...” I stated before looking to the others. “Coffee anypony?” I asked, the others' ears all perking from the suggestion. “Derpy? Wanna come in where it's warm?” I offered and she followed us all in.

Walking in through the front door, I began brushing myself off and kicked off my boots. Scootaloo giggled as she looked to me. I looked to one side and saw the door which was closed. On my other side was Derpy. I looked at myself but saw nothing worth giggling about.

“What?” I asked and she nudged her head upwards, myself and Derpy looking up to see a mistletoe directly above us. A blush came about both our cheeks as we looked to one another.

I heard Dash's laughter echo from above.“You know what that means, don't yah?” Dash teased us both and I swallowed hard as Derpy looked to me with an adorably cute, timid blush.

Before a word could be spoke between us, I heard Lassie speak up. “Outta my way!” She playfully shoved Derpy aside and tackled me to the ground, assaulting my face with lipstick covered kisses.

“ACK... GAHHH... LASSIE!” I gasped but as I opened my mouth to speak she shoved her tongue down my throat and began to forcefully make out with me. The others, even Alfred, all laughing at my poor luck as my dog essentially molested me.

She pulled away for just one second to speak. “Come on dude, you promised yesterday you'd let me molest you when we got inside...”

Author's Note

Well, sorry I missed Christmas guys and gals. I got sick and misreable before I could get the chapter done and have been sitting drinking bottle after bloody bottle of Buckly's for the last few days until now. So, Happy, delayed, Hearth's Warming, or Christmas or whatever you like, and happy new year. :raritywink:

Chapter 69

'Just an average day...'

I lay there, breath taken, as the mare before me pleasured herself eloquently with the purple phallus, letting out soft moans of pleasure as pussy juice began to leak from that beautiful puffy pink slit of hers.

I began to stroke myself, precum leaking down my length. My friend moaned out as she looked to me, no doubt imagining the exact same thing I was... that dildo being my thick cock, sliding in and out of her with glorious ease. Driving it into her, she could feel my texture, feel the near electric stimulation of my length hilting inside of her...

The cerise mare withered on the ground as her moans only grew in intensity, my own grunts added to the mix as I stroked my meaty length to the rhythm of her vibrator. I could just imagine myself, plunging into her velvety depths. My powerful body above her as I pistoned my hips into hers, our bodies connected in a sacred unification...

Her tongue lolled out of her mouth as her rear end began to tense up, a squeaky whine leaving her mouth as she held her breath. Tensing up, her foreleg spasmed and she accidentally tossed her dildo, said toy slapping my face.

I got a full view of her petite little twat, slightly gaped from the dildo. Her inner muscles contracted as she oozed out a drizzle of marecum that leaked down between her perfectly toned flank cheeks. I watched as her hole would try to close shut, then open back up when she'd gasp and twitch in orgasmic high.

I took her toy, coated in her juices, and began to suck on it, tasting her essence as I stroked myself closer to my own impending orgasm. Her one hoof darted to her clit, rubbing it furiously as she drove herself further over the edge. How easy it would be for me to just...

I tossed the toy aside. Jerking myself off just wouldn't due. Standing to all fours, I slinked towards her, tongue licking the sides of my lips as I eyed my prize. She moaned out for me to stop, barely able to speak with her orgasm still shaking her body.

We weren't supposed to have sex, just masturbate together. But I couldn't take it anymore, I just had to have her-

* * *

I went to turn the page but found that the page after was vacant of words, just a sexy picture of a show mare in a very dazzling pose. I flipped to the next page but it too just had more pictures. I flipped back to the story and found where I left off then turned to the next page. With a slight groan I shook my head. The pages were stuck together...

“So what happens next?” asked a dopey voice, making me jump up in fright.

“YEAAAAA! WHAT?!” I gasped, scrambling and falling off the side of my lawn chair. I hadn't been paying attention to my surroundings and had gotten very drawn into the story, so much so I apparently hadn't been able to notice the pony sitting right in front of my lap. Looking to the voice's owner, I spotted Derpy, sitting carelessly right by my lap, chin on her front hooves while each elbow was on the outside of one of my legs. 'Goddess, somepony could get the wrong idea from seeing us like this...'

“What happens next?” she asked, shaking me out of my shock.

“I... next?” I asked, still confused and a little weary about what she meant by that. Derpy stood up and retrieved the Playcolt magazine, myself having flung it when she startled me. Handing me the magazine, she asked the same question over again.

“The story you were reading. What happens after he couldn't take it anymore? Can you read me the ending?” she asked. Her voice was so simple and calm that I wondered if she had any idea what was happening in the story. She had to have at least a semblance of idea, I mean... even Evan would understand what was going on.

“I... I uhh... I can't,” I replied and she looked to me with a bit of a frown.

“Well, why not? I wanna know what happens,” she told me, still making me hesitant about whether or not she had any clue about the happenings of the story. She had to have... it was just so obvious.

“The...” I looked to Lassie, whom was snoozing peacefully on the deck by the pool. I rolled up the magazine and threw it at her, smucking her in the side of the head. Jolting up in shock, she flailed her paws as she slipped and fell into the pool, quickly scrambling in the water and pulling herself out.

“HEY! What gives?! It might be warm out but that water is still freezing!” she screamed as shivered.

“The pages are stuck together,” I said, giving Derpy her explanation as to why I couldn't continue the story, and to make a point to Lassie. My dog huffed as she picked up her porn mag and began to flip through the pages, finally finding the pages that were stuck together.

“Man... I thought I was the only one to jerk off to words... figured everypony else rubbed it off to pictures... you might get your keyboard sticky reading this stuff...” she mused as she began to walk away from the pool. Derpy spoke up and gained both our attention.

“But what happens? I wanna know,” Derpy pleaded and Lassie fished through the smut magazine and found the story again.

“I think in this one, he comes to his senses... kinda. Him and her are like... mutual masturbator partners or something stupid, where they get off by watching each other rub one off... I'm not sure how it works, or why they don't just rut, but uhh... he comes to his senses and nuts all over her face instead,” she informed us, myself not really needing to know.

Derpy's expression was... well, her usual expression. Hard to tell if it was casual or confused. “Nuts on her face? Like... pea-nuts?” she asked in confusion which had Lassie cackling humorously as she nudged me while walking away.

“Her and Evan would make a FANTASTIC couple. They're both ditsier than...” she trailed off before shaking wildly, splashing both Derpy and I with cold water. With that she walked off with her smut magazine, myself and Derpy dripping wet.

It was spring time now. The birds were out and chirping, flowers blooming, animals awakening from hibernation... all that good crap. With it came warmer weather, but not warm enough to tolerate getting splashed with cold water.

I walked back into my home, through the sliding glass patio door, Derpy following me in. “Wait, so what happened in the end? What did Lassie mean by 'Nuts all over her face'?” she pestered, wanting to know the details. I began to pull out all the necessities for making a sandwich and just as I pulled out the bread, leaned on the counter to speak with her.

The cute pegasus mare hovered a few feet off the floor on the opposite side of the counter, looking to me with those big round eyes of hers. “Derpy... I got a question for you,” I began and she nodded before speaking.

“Will you tell me what happened in the end of the story?” she asked and I nodded as I reached for the nearby peanut butter.

“Do you know what sex is? Like... intercourse?” I asked, the mare blushing slightly as she nodded with a slight giggle.

“Uh-huh, of course. Everypony my age knows what that is... at least, I think they do. It's when a stallion and a mare really like each other and the stallion puts his-” I cut her short, not needing an explanation of what it was.

"Yeah-yeah-yeah! Derpy, I know what sex is," I told her, the mare tilting her head to one side with a curious look. "I just... need to make sure you know what it is before I explain this..." I told her as I twisted off the lid to the peanut butter and scooped some up on the utensil. With a casual look, I began to spread some of the substance on a few slices of bread. She watched as I made myself the sandwich then came to a snap discovery... kind of.

“OHHHHH, like pea-nut butter!” she exclaimed and I blinked, looking to her, then to my sandwich and finally back to her. I think at this point I was more curious than she was about the story.

“What?” I asked, a little confused by her sudden outburst.

“Lassie said he nutted on her face... like 'pea-nutted-butter? Did he put peanut butter on her face?” she asked, making me want to groan. She'd definitely make a cute couple with Evan.

“Derpy... would you like a sandwich before I explain what happened?” I asked and she looked to the sandwiches as I began to put jelly on them.

“Do you have any muffins instead?” she asked and I perked a brow with wonder, not sure if we did or not. I told her I'd check as I began to rummage through our cupboards. Derpy meanwhile, inspected the sandwiches and poked the layer of peanut butter, smearing some on her hoof before rubbing it on her cheek.

“Why would he put peanut butter on her face? It just gets all sticky,” she asked, making me chuckle faintly as I continued to search. She licked her hoof and hummed pleasantly before trying to get the rest off her face with just her tongue. I heard her start chewing and imagined she was probably trying out one of the sandwiches.

“Derpy?...” I asked as I crawled up onto a counter top to reach up on top of the cupboards and inspect the contents of a few jars.

“Mhmm?” she asked through a mouthful.

“Do you know what masturbation is?” I asked, getting the same mouth-filled response. “So you know what those two were... shit...” I commented as all I found in the jar were a few crumbs. 'Lassie... putting the jars back even thought they're empty so nopony will know she got into them...'

I shuffled over to check the other jars. “Who decided to put these damn things up here?” I asked quietly, quickly recalling Trixie hiding them up here with her magic so that Lassie couldn't make off with them. 'Like that helped any...'

Getting back on topic, I finished my question. “Do you know what those two were doing? In the story?” I asked and she nodded before I heard her swallow audibly.

“Mhmm, yeah. They were masturbating together,” she replied, making me perk a brow as I looked over my shoulder to her, seeing the mare with her hoof stuck in the jar of peanut butter, some of the brown creamy substance splattered on the sides off her muzzle. She looked as though she was struggling with the jar a little.

I thought to myself about how close she had been to my lap. About how she was leaning with her foreleg elbows resting on each side of my legs and how she knew exactly what I was reading yet... decided to sit the way she was...

“So... if you knew what the story was about... why were you listening to me read it?” I asked, a pike of curiosity in my voice as I started to search for the muffins again.

“Because you were reading out loud. I love listening to you read,” she replied and I again turned back to her, catching her as she struggled to get the jar off her hoof. I stifled a laugh as I went back to the task at hand. I heard the jar of peanut butter being thunked off the counter top as she continued to struggle.

“And you... never thought it particular that you were listening to me read an... erotic story... something friends don't generally read together?” I asked, and her voice came back a little muffled.

“Amph-buh-camph-aamph!” My head leaned back slightly, away from the cupboards as I rose a brow. The hell does that mean? I shook it off and inspected another jar, finally finding some muffins.

“AH-HA! Found them!” I announced as I retrieved the jar and instinctively took a step back. My legs and arms began immediately flailing as I stepped onto thin air, no longer on the counter top I had crawled onto. Falling back, I hit the tile floor rather hard, smucking the back of my head in the process while muffins flew everywhere.

My vision was dazed along with my hearing. Derpy's muffled voice came to my aid, screaming out in a strange tongue. “EVAAA- ARPGH-PPFTAH!” As she came to my side, I looked to her. The end of her muzzle looked a little... longer than usual, and slightly out of shape. I reached up to her and patted the side of her cheek which... was smeared with peanut butter.

After just a brief moment, the colors of disorientation past and I realized it was the peanut butter jar stuck to her face, her mouth wedged into the opening. I chuckled briefly as I patted her head. “A little bit of a problem?” I teased and I could tell Derpy was trying to frown before trying in vain to get it off. “Here, let me help...” I trailed off as I pulled her into me, holding her tight as I plopped off the jar, peanut butter smeared all over her muzzle.

Almost like a dog, she began to lap it up before stopping and giggling. I returned her smile with one of my own, chuckling slightly. Derpy however, said something completely off topic that nearly gave me a heart attack. “I guess you nutted on my face,” she commented, my stomach twisting as my heart skipped a beat.

“Nonononono! No, that's... ah-ha-ha... that's not... no,” I laughed heartily, Derpy again raising a brow as she looked at me curiously.

“But isn't that what it means?!” she asked, desperately wanting to know. Lassie, almost as if by call, rushed into the room.

“Who nutted on whose face?!” she gasped, looking to the two of us. She blinked then scratched behind her ear with one of her hind paws. “Well?” she asked and Derpy pointed to her face.

“Evan nutted on my face? See?” she asked, pointing to the peanut butter, again making me squirm slightly. That... wasn't what it... ugh...

Lassie burst into cackling laughter, rolling around on the floor as she howled. Derpy looked to me with a puzzled look. I buried my face into my palm as I spoke. “It means... uhh... went a guy... ejaculates...” I noted to her and she blinked in confusion.

“So... why is ejaculating called nutting?” she asked and I shrugged, not having a clue in the matter. However, despite my own lack of knowledge towards the question, Derpy suddenly came to a bright realization. “OHHH! So that means in the end of the story he ejaculated on her face!” she commented, making Lassie howl even harder, nearly to the point of crying.

The two of us stood up and I grabbed a wet cloth for Derpy's peanut butter covered face, but Lassie quickly reasserted herself. “Here, let me clean it up.” She rushed over and hopped to her hindlegs, wrapping her forelegs around Derpy's neck as she began to lick off the peanut butter. The way she was doing it was almost... sexually inclined...

Derpy giggled and laughed like a filly as my dog began licking her clean, albeit erotically. She stopped before turning back to me with a smug little grin. “Mmm... your essence is delicious,” she quipped, making me groan and lean into the counter, hiding my face behind my palms. She'd never let me live this one down...

* * *

Third person...

Twilight looked to the bookshelf, perfectly sorted in alphabetical order. Spike stood next to her, exhaling in both exhaustion and satisfaction. Finally it was done...

“Actually Spike... you know, it might look better if they were arranged generically,” she told him, Spike groaning deeply. “Oh come on, who's my number one assistant?” she asked, poking him in the side. He huffed as he nodded, figuring there to be no time like the present.

'At least she's acting like her old self again,' Spike noted, thankful in a way that she wasn't still moping over Evan. She was a princess, an Element of Harmony bearer... and the Ponyville librarian. She didn't have time to mope forever.

Owlowiscious landed on her her shoulder and hooted before picking under his wing, a light bulb seeming to go off in Twilight's head. “Oh that's right...” Twilight mentioned aloud as she pulled out a long scroll labeled 'To-do list'. Reading down it, she found the spot she was thinking off. “Spike, I have to go out to Fluttershy's for a little while to get Owlowiscious preened. After that I'm having a picnic with my brother and Cadance. You don't mind staying here, do you?” she asked and the not so little dragon shook his head in reply, not that he had much choice in the matter anyway. “Okay, thanks. If you get done before I get back I guess you could go hang out with your friends,” she told him before heading out, Owlowiscious maintaining his perch on the alicorn's back.

Twilight trotted through the streets, huffing slightly at the bit of extra weight she had gained as of recently due to her pregnancy. She wouldn't lie, the thought of abortion had passed her mind once or twice, but it had been thrown aside nearly as quickly as one could bat an eye.

Sure she had bad feelings towards the man, but it was what she had wanted all those months ago, and she wouldn't take away something's life before it even had a chance. Though what would become of the foal afterwards was still a question at hoof for her. Whether she was going to keep it or put it for adoption was beyond her at this point.

Thinking about it brought a tear to her eye. All those fond memories they had together. The stupidity of his actions, but honest stupidity at that. His honest modesty and loyalty to others. How he cared for those closest to him to the point he'd do anything in his willpower to save them.

She sighed depressingly as she passed several things that bitterly reminded her of the times they had together. The theater, where they went to see so many corny movies together. The several restaurants where they had been kicked out of due to some shenanigan he or Lassie pulled, even once being Rainbow Dash...

She thought about all her friends, and how they helped her through the hard time. Unfortunately, Dash of all ponies hadn't been all that supportive in her mind. She was always pestering Twilight to give the man a second chance, to really think it over... her pestering, along with her constant arguments with Applejack over the matter hadn't made things easy, but at least they were still all close friends.

As she neared the edge of Ponyville on her way to Fluttershy's, she passed the thing that made her heart wrench the most. That small little food vendor stand, with the few picnic tables around it... she thought sorrowfully about all the romantic evenings they shared together under the moonlight, just the two of them... sometimes Lassie too...

Pushing away the feelings, a tear came to her eye as she continued on and towards the edge of the Everfree, where her timid yellow pegasus friend resided. Owlowiscious rode on her back, nibbling at the underside of his wing every once and a while as they traveled along, Twilight trying to forget the man that used to mean so much to her.

She believed it to be hard enough with her own thoughts bugging her, but when her own friends would bring it up, things got even worse. Even Celestia, on occasion, would comment that he was still essentially her faithful student and that she should further pursue a path of teaching him the importance of friendship, and that even teachers had their own tests as it was a learning experience for them as well.

Being so caught up in her thoughts, she barely even noticed Fluttershy's cottage door in front of her, and simply bumped right into it. “Bwah! Huh? Oh...” Twilight mumbled to herself but before she could even knock, Fluttershy's ever friendly voice called out.

“Oh just a moment, I'll be right there,” the shy pegasus called out, having heard Twilight bump into the door. Moments past and the door swung open, Twilight leaning her head back in shock as she saw Fluttershy's frazzled mane.

“Flu... Fluttershy?” Twilight asked in slight curiosity, wondering if perhaps it was one of Rarity's new mane styles she had been dying to try on somepony.

“Yes Twilight?” Fluttershy responded, before following the alicorn's stare to her mane. “Oh... heh-heh, sorry. Yes, I guess I do look a little different. I tried grooming Angel Bunny this morning but he's just so darn stubborn. I've had to chase him all over the house and barely got him clean,” she stated, Twilight perking a brow. The mare was determined, if anything, to get that bunny clean, even if he was impish.

“Oh... well, I brought Owlowiscious in for his preening. That is... if you're not to busy with Angel?” Twilight asked, Fluttershy feverishly shaking her head.

“Oh, no-no-no. I'll still have time. I just might not get to Owlowiscious right away though. You see...” she trailed off and looked back into her house, Twilight following her look and seeing everything a mess. Several other animals inside were all covered in muck and tapping their paws or claws impatiently. Fluttershy giggled nervously before turning back to Twilight. “I have to clean a few others, and a little bit of my house, but I can have Owlowiscious cleaned and preened by the end of the day!” she said with a joyous smile and an upbeat tone, Twilight perking a brow.

In her mind, it'd be somewhat of a rush and she didn't really want to push her friend. “Well, I mean, if it's too much to-” she was cut short as Fluttershy whistled lightly, Owlowiscious fluttering over to her back.

“Don't worry Twilight, it's nothing I can't handle,” Fluttershy assured as she smiled widely. Twilight went to interject but decided against it. If Fluttershy felt comfortable, then she'd let her do her thing.

“Well... okay, if you're up to it. I'll come by later to pick him up. I'm having a picnic with my brother and sister soon anyway. We've been planning it for a while so I don't wanna miss it,” she informed her pegasi friend who nearly gasped.

“Well if you have somewhere important to be, you better not be late!” Fluttershy said in a rushed tone. Twilight went to insist she had a little bit of time to spare but Fluttershy would have none of it. “Hurry. I wouldn't want you to be late on my behalf,” Fluttershy persisted, Twilight just chuckling as she readied to leave, the pale yellow pegasi nearly pushing her along...

* * *

Burdick Estate...

Derreck huffed stressfully as he pushed himself up, before slowly lowering himself back down with a gasp. A voice spoke up that nearly taunted him. “Come on now, is that all you've got?” Nightmare asked, giving him a set of gorgeous bedroom eyes before herself gasping.

Derreck's face twisted into an expression of near pain, sweat beading down his face. They had been at it for hours now, starting just after Derpy had left. His lips separated and a bit of drool came down his lips as he groaned outwardly.

Nightmare nearly chuckled as she watched the man struggle. “Maybe you should just give up and let me be on top,” she teased, the man huffing painfully, gasping as he lowered himself back down.

“In... yer... wildest... dreams...” he grunted, pushing himself beyond limits.

“I thought my mate was powerful. The top of his class... perhaps I was wrong,” she nagged at him, pushing him even further as his body began to shake. He began to push himself upwards once more, arms shaking, burning, his very core wanting to shut down.

As he gasped, spews of saliva came out, his eyes clenched shut. His arms began to buckle on his, refusing to push anymore, elbows kinked at the halfway mark. Nightmare gave him a dissatisfied look. Creaking open his good eye, he saw her stare, the one of disapproval, disappointment...

“Twelve-hundred!” Derreck roared at the top of his lungs, his arms giving him one last forceful motion and locking his elbows straight, finishing his final push-up. It felt like eternity as the man began to see stars and finally collapsed, his entire body burning in report. Nightmare Moon went to best the man's record, but decided she wanted to be on the bottom next time they had sex, feeling the desire to be dominated by her lover. Instead of besting the man, she instead laid down, the man's record of push-ups higher than her own. Nightmare Moon settled on the fact she had secretly used her magic to cheat halfway through the exercise, so it was only fair the man won in the end.

Every fiber of him shook and tingled, traumatized by the exertion he had put it through. Nightmare trotted over from her exercise mat and laid beside her lover, nestling him affectionately. “Very good. You're still more powerful than anypony in Equestria could ever dream to be,” she cooed, gingerly kissing his neck, which tasted rather foul due to all the body sweat. “But you definitely don't taste very good,” she remarked, Derreck shooting her a smirk.

As they lay there on the floor of the basement exercise room, Derreck continued to shake uncontrollably, still exhausted beyond anything. “Can you...” he swallowed dryly, his body suffering slight dehydration. “The weights...” he whispered.

Moon slowly began removing the heavy weight bands around his wrists, biceps, legs and waist, each one weighing a hefty amount. Caressing his face with a hoof, she gave him a toothy smile, revealing all her shiny, razor sharp teeth.

“Damn... wish my teeth... were as pretty... as yours,” he quipped, Nightmare rolling her eyes.

“Baking soda... now come, you need a shower,” she told him, sliding underneath him and hefting his body onto her back. “You need to lose some weight,” she commented, Derreck smirking faintly as he clenched his fists, thinking back on the night she had given the gift to him.

“I'm not to blame for that,” he chuckled with a slight groan. Truth be told, he himself had to adjust to the extra weight of having his entire skeleton coated in Shadow Steel, which worked both for and against him.

As Nightmare had explained to him, the extra coating would put a severe hindrance on his agility and would give him an excessive body weight. However, the metal was solid and dense down to a molecular base, the reason behind the hefty weight, but also made his skeletal frame virtually indestructible by any means, save for things like The Elements of Harmony...

As they walked down the hallways, they passed The Great and Powerful Trixie, whom gasped from the sight. “Derreck! Are you alright?!” she asked in panic, Derreck giving a weak thumbs up.

“W-what happened?!” she asked in pure shock of his condition.

Barely able to speak, Nightmare spoke for him. “He's going to need a bath but he will be fine,” she assured the younger mare, Trixie looking to the man, and then to the frightening alicorn goddess.

“Shall Trixie make him some soup? Or perhaps a milkshake of some sort?” she offered, the man raising his head.

“Strawberry... with kiwi... and some coconut milk... that would be pretty... wizard...” he whispered softly, Trixie in turn giving him a strange look.

“Wizard?” she asked, Nightmare rolling her eyes as she proceeded to the washroom, Derreck thinking to himself triumphantly, 'I'm bringin' it back!'. Entering the restroom, Moon placed the man aside before she drew a bath for the him, a steamy hot one with extra sudsy bubbles.

“You were exceptional today,” Moon told him, the man snickering.

“I don't feel so exceptional right now...” he chuckled, Moon giving him a sly smile.

“And neither would your opponent had you been in the heat of battle,” she commented as she hung a set of towels near the luxurious bathtub that steamed with heat. “I am truly grateful to be your mate,” she told him, striking the man with a douse of nostalgia in how she addressed their relationship.

Grasping him in a magical hold, she lowered him into the steamy bath before slipping off her own attire and stepping in with him. The man's head slumped forwards, his body to wiped for him to move much. The hot bath water felt good on his tender body though, allowing him to unwind from the brutal exercise. Moon started by washing herself gracefully, putting on quite the show.

Washing herself down, her fur smoothed out but her mane continued to flow with the iconic translucent appearance. “Your mane... does it get wet?” Derrecl asked, the mare looking to him with a slight smile. Slowly standing up, her fur further drooped, water draining off her like a sieve. Walking over with a bedroom eyed look, she crawled up against him, pressing her back into his chest and her head under his chin. “Find out for yourself, lover,” she offered, nuzzling into him contently.

She took hold of his hand and guided it to her mane before letting it go, the man slowly gliding his hand through her gorgeous set of mystic hair. There was almost no feeling of existence, just a watery, silky ambiance that slipped through his fingers. He couldn't grasp it for a better feel as the mane would just slip away.

Nightmare began to wash the man down, caressing his muscular arms and snuggling into an embrace with him. As the mare washed him down, the man followed suit and returned the favor. Her wings slowly spread out and the man did his best to clean them out thoroughly, while at the same time enjoying their feeling and texture.

As the two finished cleaning off, they settled there, Nightmare guiding the man's hand to her abdomen, stroking it over her now slightly bulged stomach. “What do you think she'll be like?” Nightmare asked, Derreck raising a brow.

“She?” he asked curiously, Nightmare giving him a playful look.

“You think our foal will be a colt instead?” she inquired Derreck shrugging.

“I dunno. The way it sounded, you made it seem like you had yourself checked and you knew for certain,” he replied, Nightmare Moon giving him a peck on the cheek.

“Okay, in that case... what do you think our child will be like?” she asked, humming to herself as the man stroked her stomach.

“I think 'she' will be... strong and powerful, like her father but...” he put his palm to Moon's chin and turned it his way. “She'll have your beautiful eyes and breath-taking figure,” he told her knowingly.

“You think I'm beautiful?” she asked, Derreck laughing.

“No, I don't think you're beautiful..." he told her, Moon giving him a look. "I 'know' you're beautiful. Nopony in Equestria even comes close,” he told her knowingly, the mare leaning up to connect her lips with his. They held each other in the tight embrace for some time before Nightmare noticed a growing presence pressing against her flank.

“I see you still have some strength left,” she teased, taking his hand and slowly guiding it down to her nethers. The man nuzzled his face into her neck, the mare humming a most wondrous tune of love as he kissed her ever so gingerly.

Her front hooves moved up to his cheeks and pulled his lips into hers, the two embracing in a loving kiss as the man's fingers began to slowly slid into her slit, Moon moaning into the man's mouth.

They both lay there in the tub, caressing one another before Nightmare shifted slightly, rising her rump up over his lap and slowly sliding down onto his erection, impaling herself with it and letting out a soft, hushed moan of pleasure.

Wrapping his arms around her waist, the man moaned softly, his head nestling into her neck as she whined out, almost a cry, in peer bliss. He could feel her inner muscles squeezing him, trying to coax him into cumming early.

Savoring every moment with her, he gave gentle thrusts rather than the powerful ones he usually resorted to. Nightmare hummed to herself, moaning lewdly as her rear end continued to tense from the sheer ecstasy she was experiencing.

Moving his hand down to her slit, he began to play with her little nub, a lone scream leaving her mouth before Moon bit down on her lower lip, stifling the moans. Her entire lower section tensed up and her pussy began to constrict around the man's intruding shaft, Derreck huffing as the increased tightness furthered his own pleasure as he continued to slowly slide in and out of the mare's glorious love tunnel. He mouth gaped open as she let out a high pitched scream, one that was soon mixed with a throaty moan.

Coming to a stop as Moon twitched, Derreck lowered his lips to hers, the two embracing in a loving connection as she rode out the rest of her orgasmic high. As she came down, she looked to him with fluttering eyes. The two just sat there for a few moments, her pussy continuing to softly squeeze against the man's cock which was still lodged in her pussy.

Standing up, she knelt over just in front of him, water draining out of her fur as she wiggled her flank. “I can tell you're close. Finish inside of me, my mate,” she cooed him, Derreck barely even struggling as he stood up and took her in a most primal position.

Grabbing her by the hips, he pulled her in closed but just before he could penetrate, there was an approving whistle from outside the door. “Oh yeah baby, do it like a pair of dogs! Breed her like a bitch!” Lassie's voice called, both Derreck and Luna's vibe completely killed as they realized they were being watched. “Hey? What gives? Keep going, I wanna see that glorious cumshot! Cream that pussy, make it leak!” she called.

“L-Lassie! Wa-what are you doing?!” Derreck called out in shocked stutter, Lassie huffing in response.

“Well what do you expect? All my Playcolt magazines are in there. I would listen to Trixie rub one off but she always role-plays with herself,” Lassie muttered, just before a second voice cut in.

“Trixie does no such thing!” Trixie nearly screamed with a 'Humph!'.

“You do too!” Lassie commented back, before a third voice cut in.

“And you would be the one to talk, Lassie? Or should I call you: Rodeo Jane?” Chrysalis asked. Derreck could hear Lassie as she nearly gasped.

“Hush you... you... feeds off the 'essence' of love during sex,” Lassie snapped back. Within seconds there was bickering outside the door and Derreck quickly stood up and walked over, splashing water all over the floor before swinging open the door.

He nearly gasped in shock as he stood naked before Lassie, The Great and Powerful Trixie, Queen Chrysalis, Discord and even...

“Alfred?!” he asked in disbelief, the butler looking to him with a plain expression.

“Believe me sir, I wasn't intruding on you privacy. I only recently came around to check what the commotion was about... and to clean their mess when they were done.” He motioned to the floor where there lay puddles of ejaculate, both male and female, all beneath the group that had surrounded the door and peeped on Nightmare and Derreck.

“I'm done... I'm just...” Derreck walked away and towards his room as Nightmare timidly wrapped herself with a towel...

* * *

Pastures outside Ponyville...

Twilight nearly lunged at Cadance as the two embraced into a hug before breaking from one another and chanting. “Sunshine, sunshine ladybugs awake, clap your hooves and do a little shake!” The two giggled playfully like when they were just fillies.

Shining Armor took his sister into a playful headlock and tussled her mane. “How's my best little sister?” he asked joyously, the two laughing it up.

“Just wonderful. Today is gonna be the best day ever, I just know it.” Twilight had an all too confident smile, one that wasn't forced but rather natural and assuring to both her brother and sister-in-law...

* * *

Burdick Estate...

Derreck mused with himself, sitting lonesome as he pondered thoughts to himself, Evan's voice picking up as his conscious as the duo spoke. Had anypony random saw him, they might think him to be insane...

“Nah I'm telling you... this is the life. Sitting back, feet kicked up... cereal,” Derreck mentioned to himself, Evan's thoughts countering.

“But I just feel... like there should be something more, you know?” he asked, the big man shaking his head.

“Nah... this is it man, the top. Peak physical health, near indestructible body, lots of cash, big mansion... cereal. What more could you ask for?” Derreck asked in a serious way. "I mean... I guess... more cereal, right?"

“I dunno... sometimes I just... feel like we should make amends-” he was cut off as Lassie hopped joyously into the kitchen.

“I heard somepony say cereal!...” she trailed off as she looked to the table and to the man that spoke as though he was two separate entities. “Derreck... Evan... I'm just gonna mooch some of that cereal off yah,” the English Rough Collie said as she sat across from the duo and poured herself a bowl.

Derreck chuckled to himself as he watched the pooch mow down her bowl of Fruity Hoops. “So...” Lassie said through a mouthful. “Whatcha talkin' bout?” she asked, her table manners nothing to boast about.

Evan's voice spoke outwardly. “Making amends,” he answered, Derreck rolling his eye with a sigh as Lassie spoke Derreck's exact thoughts.

“With who?” she asked, slurping down some more cereal and making a slight mess. Derreck nodded with a chuckle, giving her a thumbs up.

“My point exactly-” he was cut off by a shrieking scream that had both Derreck and Lassie standing to attention. Next came the smashing echo of glass and the duo were rushing down the stairs and to the origin of the sound.

Sounds of struggle echoed down the hallway. “IT'S COMING FROM TRIXIE'S ROOM!” Lassie called out as the two rushed further down the hallway and finally to the door, which had already been kicked down by the perpetrator.

Two thugs struggled to retain the kicking magician mare while another painfully started to stand up in the back corner of the room, a burn mark from an energy blast sizzling on his chest. “Hey tough-guy!” Derreck called out and spotted a magic wand resting on the floor by his feet, or rather what Trixie passed off as a magic wand.

Scooping it up in a hurry, he hurled the pointy little stick at one of the baddies just as he was turning his head. The wand jabbed right into his ear canal and had the stallion flopping on the ground, screaming in agony just a second later.

The other stallion looked to him and Derreck motioned for him to fight. “Yeah that's right bub, me and you, mono-e-mono!” Derreck moved like lightning, all his training with Nightmare Moon showing off in full force.

The stallion didn't even get a chance to flinch as Derreck plowed him into a wall and thumped his skull a few times with his steely hard knuckles.

Lassie moved on the guy in the corner, tackling him to the floor and biting at his neck but the stallion got a lucky blow and knocked the canine away. However, no sooner had he stood back up, was he blasted into the wall again by Trixie, albeit non-lethally.

Derreck continued to thump his stallion's head until the body went limp, blood drooling from his nose and ears. Not a moment later the hair on the back of his neck spiked, his unnatural senses going wild. Twirling on his heels, he drove an arced elbow strike into the attacker coming from behind.

His blow caught the wand stuck in his ear and the force was enough to drive it further down his ear canal and directly into his brain, killing him instantly. Turning to check on the others, he spotted Trixie shuffling back to one wall, a blasted but still living stallion staggering to his hooves on the opposite side of the room and Lassie getting her bearings from the opposite side of him.

Derreck looked to the third culprit and lowered his fists. “So... who the hell are you?” Derreck asked, the lone stallion wiping his lip clean.

“I'm from the Gravelli family... or rather, I was. This is for all our brothers and sisters you've killed!” he snarled, Derreck rolling his eye.

“Sweet Celestia dude, I wiped you guys out ages-” he was cut off by a calm and most gentle voice.

“Sir, might I ask...” Alfred trailed off as he looked at the situation in detail, having only just entered the room without former knowledge of the happenings. His brow perked as the lone aggressor turned to see the butler standing idly by in the doorway. “Indeed.” Alfred flicked his wrist and the stallion gasped, a movement so fast and sudden even Derreck barely noticed.

Everything stood still for a moment before the stallion staggered and fell over to his back, a kitchen knife jabbed through one of his eyes. “LUNA! Goddess, Alfred, did you really have to do that?” Derreck asked in mild shock, surprised his butler would take a life.

“Sir... I am paid to take all manners of trash in your household and dispose of them... I don't seriously believe he was going to listen to reason.” Things continued to stand still. Alfred sighed as he rolled his eyes. “I'm a butler working for the mafia.” Derreck nodded his head as Lassie spoke.

“That makes sense. So-” she was cut off by the sound of breaking glass upstairs.

“Son of a bitch! There's more of them. Lassie, grab a shotgun!” Derreck ordered before turning to Alfred and Trixie. He knew Trixie wasn't much of a fighter, hence why she hadn't killed the stallion either time she blasted him.

“I'll watch Trixie sir, you have my word she'll be fine,” Alfred assured the man who gave him an approving nod in return. Rushing out of the room, Lassie scurried one way while Derreck charged off in the opposite direction.

Just as the big man turned the corner for the stairs he instinctively leaned back, dodging a swing from an ax. The culprit swung again and the big man caught the blade between his palms, pulling the weapon aside and driving his forehead into the aggressor's muzzle, breaking the stallion's nose.

As the stallion staggered back, Derreck turned the weapon on its former owner, driving the blade deep into the corner of his neck and shoulder before continuing on. Rushing up the stairs, he heard more voices, but in his rush didn't listen in.

Charging up the stairs with a revealing roar he rounded a corner and into a hallway but took a full frontal blow to the chest from a sledgehammer. The force slammed Derreck hard, knocking him into the adjacent wall with brutal force.

With a grunt, the man looked to face his attacker and nearly gasped as the sledge was already being swung again, this time by an overhead blow directed for his skull. Ducking into a roll, he dodged the blow, hearing the crunch of the heavy weapon crashing through the wall.

Spinning on his feet, he drove a hard blow into the stallion's temple, the body going limp as it fell to the ground in a lifeless heap. Before he could even react, a scream echoed from behind him and a blunt instrument was bashed against the side of his head.

The oak baseball bat snapped in half from being battered against his Shadow Steel lined skull. Derreck, still dazed from the blow, staggered about. The attacker looked in shock at the broken in half bat, baffled that it actually snapped, before coming to the realization he could just stab the man with the jagged end.

Rushing for the killing strike, he lunged but was shocked as the man hammered a blow into his gut, one so fierce it penetrated skin and the man's fist went right into his stomach. The stallion gasped in excruciating pain as the man heaved him up and off the floor, his legs dangling in the air as the man's fist drove further into his body. Blood spurted out of the stallion's mouth as he was heaved up, eyes wide in shock.

Derreck pulled his arm back, entire forearm soaked in the stallion's blood and the culprit himself dropping into a heap on the ground, crimson oozing out of not only the wound but his mouth as well. Screams of pure horror caught his attention as several bodies were tossed down a set of nearby stairs leading into the upper floor. Flashes of brilliant light illuminated shadows even in broad daylight as more screaming came from upstairs before utter silence enveloped the home.

Moving cautiously, he nearly stumbled on his footing as Nightmare came rushing down the same flight of stairs the bodies had tumbled down. “UGH! Moon!” he stammered, the mare looking to him, seeing his expression before smirking.

“I nearly took over the world once, you know? What is so surprising about me dispatching a few nameless thugs?” she asked in a way that made Derreck feel slightly dumber for having not thought of that first.

“Yeah, good poin-” he was cut off by an infuriated voice.

“DON'T FUCKIN' MOVE!” the voice screamed, the duo both turning to the voice's owner whom stood a few feet away with an automatic crossbow in hoof. “You fuckin... cock-a-roaches!” the stallion said in a most peculiar voice that had Derreck thinking about Tony Montana for just a slight second, chuckling to himself quietly.

Derreck held his hands up defensively as Moon just looked at the stallion with a most particular glare. “Alright, motha fucka! This is fo' all the Gravelli you killed! SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND!” He yelled out before a thunderous echoing KA-BOOM deafened everyone.

The stallion's body was knocked into the railing of the in-house balcony, staggering slightly as he gasped for life. 'KA-CHUKE!' The stallion turned to see his maker but barely got a glimpse. KA-BOOM! The stallion's body was knocked over the railing and fell down into the atrium fountain below. Derreck tapped the side of his ears, now ringing in a disorienting way.

Moon shook off her own disorientation and turned to Derreck whom twitched his eye. “Mind giving us warning next time?” he asked to Lassie, whom stood a few feet to the side of where the stallion had been previously, the smoking barrel of Nightshade still hovering at hip level.

“Say whaaa?! No, 'Hey thanks Lassie for totally saving our asses back there.' No, instead I get this! You know, one day I'm gonna save your ass... and you're probably gonna wanna kiss me,” she laughed, Derreck shaking his head before looking over the railing and to the fountain below which had been tainted red from the stallion's blood.

“Say hello to that,” he muttered as he looked down to the final thug. He chuckled to himself, speaking to Evan about what his conscious had mentioned before. “How's that for making amends?” he joked before turning around and watching Lassie blow the smoke from the Mossberg 590A1's barrel. The pooch then began to dance around on her hindlegs while singing, pretending the shotgun was her dance partner.

“Can't touch this, dun-dun-dun-dun... dun-dun-DUNNA! Can't touch this,” Lassie began to sing and dance absurdly, not knowing the proper lyrics or beat, with both Derreck and Moon watching her in awkward silence...

* * *

Ponyville...

Twilight laid lazily on her side with a satisfied sigh, soaking in the warm sunny day in peace as her brother and Cadance did the same. The trio enjoyed a peaceful afternoon of tranquility, just conversing on old times and fond memories.

Twilight giggled. “And remember that time Shiny, when you tried to catch that bullfrog for me and it slipped from your hooves and splashed you... ha-ha-ha, you screamed louder than I did,” the lavender mare giggled, her brother chuckling with a nod.

“Yupp, sure do. Mom actually still has the photo of us together when we finally caught it. Those were the days,” The two sighed with content just as a flock of birds flew over head, their chirping calls making Twilight smile warmly.

The entire trio watched as the family of birds flew over head, Cadance perking a rather serious question. “So, about Evan?...” she trailed off in question, Twilight swallowing hard but not answering. “Have you... talked to him at all? You know, about... anything?” she asked, pressing the question of Twilight's pregnancy.

The mare in question shook her head. “There's nothing to talk about,” she answered, Shinning being the next to cut in.

“Well... sure there is Twily. What's gonna happen when you foal?” he asked, Twilight shooting him a stupid look. She had left the man out of her thoughts for a long while now, and it hurt inwardly to have to think of him now.

“I'll have my foal, what more is there to say?” Twilight questioned him, her tone a little sharp. Her big brother just sighed before Twilight spoke up again. “Can we just drop this? It's bad enough that one of my best friends is sided with him, along with Celestia of all ponies. Don't tell me you're siding with him too,” she shot, Cadance shaking her head.

“Twilight, we're not taking his side or anything like that. We're just concerned about you. We just want to make sure you're okay,” she assured her younger sister-in-law.

“I am okay. I'm fine. Peachy. Joyous! One hundred and ten percent!” Twilight said, her voice somewhat unnerving to the others. Cadance sighed with a slight frown.

“I remember when you first met him, how love-struck you were. Head over heels for that man. I had no idea why, even to this day. Heck, you even had me try various spells to make him fall in love with you, remember? If you truly didn't love him anymore, you wouldn't have any feelings towards the subject-” Cadance was cut short by a rather irritated Twilight.

“Can we just drop it please?” she nearly snapped, her relatives slowly swallowing before nodding solemnly, not wanting to see their beloved sister hurt on their day off together. Having barely enough time to see each other as it was, they decided not to ruin the otherwise glorious day by speaking of the mare's heartbreak...

* * *

Burdick Estate...

Derreck patted down the hump of sand so it was flat, doing his best to pack it well. With a sigh, he wiped his sweaty brow, smearing gritty dirt across his face. Just as he went for his water bottle, a friendly presence landed gracefully beside him.

Picking up the water bottle for him, the cyan blue pegasus tossed over the bottle of water to the big man. “Whatcha doin' big guy?” she asked, the man wiping his lip before taking a gulp of the water.

“Yard work. Lawn trimming... flattening the place out. It dips in a few spots... also gotta go get some sod for the places I had to fill in. Hopefully the grass grows in the same color,” he partially lied as he stood over the mysterious hump of sand.

Dash perked her brow, wondering what to think. “I thought you had a butler?” she asked, Derreck nodding in response.

“I do... but the dude is old. He tends to the mansion mostly... maybe I should've hired some handymares eh?” he chuckled before taking another swig of the water. “Meh... gotta stay active. Can't just sit around lazily, yah know?” he asked rhetorically, Dash rolling her eyes.

“Well... whatever the case, I have a big favor to ask of you. Huge,” she stated, Derreck raising a brow.

“Okay, shoot,” he replied.

“I'm off to train with the Wonderbolts for the next week... and I was hoping you could watch Scootaloo. You know, bring her to school, pack her lunch, all that good stuff?” Dash asked, Derreck raising a brow before pointing to himself.

Dash huffed a sigh as she rolled her eyes. “Listen, I've been talking to the others... AJ, Pinkie, even Twilight... but it's not easy for me to convince them you're not really that bad when there's so many rumors surfacing about you clapping bad guys. I'm no stranger to violence, believe me. I mean, come on. I helped kill Nightmare Moon once and... well, Spike and Princess Cadance technically killed King Sombra but... we don't go around just wasting all our foes. Yet it seems with you, every week there's some rumor floating around that you killed some more criminals...” Dash trailed off, the man looking side to side vicariously.

“Okay?...” he asked, Dash grunting.

“Listen to me!” she snapped. “If you want me to help you get on good terms again with the others you have to at least try to be civilized. It doesn't matter if you're doing the right thing or not. They won't see it the same way!” Dash scoffed at him and the man just sighed as he leaned on his shovel handle.

Dash sighed and looked to him with a serious expression. “I usually drop her off with Applejack or Rarity. Scootaloo is good friends with both their sisters. BUT!...” she told him sternly. “Scootaloo seems to really like you. I'm giving you a chance here. Don't buck it up and make me look bad too. You show up to school to drop her off everyday, pick her up, make her lunches... all that good, cuddly stuff... you'll show them that you have what it takes, and they won't be able to deny it. It'll be a fact that you're NOT a bad pony... err, person. Please, for the love of Celestia, help me help you,” she nearly pleaded with the man

“Okay... alright. I'll watch her,” Derreck replied, Dash sighing inwardly.

“DON'T... make me regret this,” she told him, the man nodding before Dash's ears sprang to full attention. “Oh yeah, and I picked you up something at the library. I remember a long time ago that Twilight said you and her would read stories together. Mackenzie Bolack or something like that,” she mentioned, Parker raising a brow.

'Technically that was Evan, not me,' he thought to himself as Dash reached under her wing and pulled out a relatively small book then handed it over.

“Here. I figured you of all ponies should read this. It might just do you some good,” she mentioned. Derreck took the book without giving it a look and gave her a nod. “Alright. I'll drop Scootaloo off later. Just please... please, please, PLEASE! Don't mess this up,” she nearly begged, the man wavering his hand.

“It's cool. I got this. Trust me,” he assured her, the mare nodding and readying to leave. “Oh and Dash...” the man trailed off, the pegasus turning back to him. “Thank you... for everything. It means the world to me. Really, it does,” he thanked her, the mare giving him a nod before shooting off at mach speed. Derreck stood there by his lonesome before looking to the story and reading out the title. “The art of peace...”

Author's Note

Well, there's another chapter out. I don't really have much to say other than I hope everyone's New Year is going well so far. So from Burdy to you, happy new year and cheers...

Chapter 70

'Not really foal-sitter material...'

The metallic wheels of the train rode along the rails, the machine moving at a modest pace for its size. Plumes of smoke left from the front stack of the train engine, the engine chugging as the train moved along, pulling with it a few cabin cars.

The steam train whistled it's almost unique horn as it continued along the rail, still shuddering away. A body the size of the train engine knelt down beside it, her tail flickering as she inspected the locomotive.

“That's sooooo cool!” Scootaloo chimed as she watched the miniature train putt through the room. I scratched an itch above my eyebrow and nodded.

“Yeah... it really is something else, huh?” I asked as the train proceeded into a tunnel located on the far wall of the room.

Scootaloo's eyes were wide with fascination, like she had never before seen something so interesting. Surely she had rode on a steam train once or twice before... but perhaps it was the fact this one was miniature. She turned to me with an excited look. “Where does it go?!” she asked, vividly curious.

I rubbed the side of my head, tussling my mat of hair. “Uhh... I dunno. It came back covered in snow once,” I replied, Scootaloo gasping.

“Maybe it goes all the way to The Crystal Empire!” she exclaimed in an adventurous tone, her truly colorful imagination showing. I chuckled as I patted her on the shoulder.

“Maybe... I dunno. The time it came back with snow was during winter so it probably just goes outside,” I replied more practically, Scootaloo's expression of imaginative joy dying off.

Words seemed to flow out of my mouth without me thinking them, as though I was possessed by another. “But you never know. Maybe it does go to The Crystal Empire, maybe even further!” I exclaimed, almost cocking a brow at my own ridiculous explanation. 'Did I really just say that?'

Scootaloo's joyous expression returned as she nearly jumped with excitement. “WOAH... I didn't think there's anything past The Crystal Empire! Can we figure out where it goes? You know, like ride on it?! The seats look big enough for us to sit on, and the tunnel isn't too small!” she pointed out. I looked at the tunnel entrance, taking note that I probably could fit, even when sitting on the train seat but... it wouldn't be very comfortable.

“I dunno...” I replied, Scootaloo giving me a pouty face. “Actually...” I said, looking to my watch and seeing that it was nearing 8pm. “It's time for bed,” I informed, Scootaloo's shoulders dropping low.

“Awwwww... no way!” she retorted, myself pointing to my watch. “Aww come on, just one more hour?” she pleaded, myself shaking my head.

“Sorry kid, no can do. Bedtime is bedtime,” I told her in a mildly stern voice, Scootaloo sighing in defeat.

“Oh, alright,” Scootaloo muttered dejectedly as I led her to one of the multiple guest rooms.

“Well... I guess you can have this one. Bed's kinda big but uhh... well, you know,” I replied as Scootaloo trotted over and hopped up onto the bed before turning back and looking to me. “So uhh... uhm, yeah I guess I'll drive you to school tomorrow?” I asked and Scootaloo just looked to me with a rather blank expression.

Time seemed to stand still and for a moment I thought it really had stopped, until she spoke. “Can you read me a bedtime story?” she asked and I cocked a brow.

“Wull... uhh... like?...” I trailed off. I didn't really have a story on hand at the moment. “I don't really have one with me right now, you know?” I replied but she just smiled and came back with something else.

“Well can you make one up instead?” she asked hopefully. I rolled my eye with a deep sigh.

“Uhh... sure, okay,” I said as I leaned on the frame of the doorway. “So there was this... princess-” she immediately cut me short.

“What was her name?” Scootaloo asked, already intrigued by the story.

“I... it doesn't matter,” I told her, Scootaloo giving me a look. “Anyway, the princess met a prince and uhh... they fell in love... I guess,” I told her, figuring that to be the end.

“And then what happened?” Scootaloo asked, hoping for the story to continue.

“Uhh, no... no, that was the end. They lived happily ever after, you know?” I asked but her expression almost looked like she had been robbed of something. “Listen kid... it's time for bed okay?” I told her and she nodded solemnly, laying down and tucking herself in as I flicked off the lights.

“Wait!” Scootaloo called out and I turned back to her. “Can you leave the light on?” she asked.

“Well... but if the lights are on then how will you sleep?” I asked and she went quiet, my conscious speaking up.

'She's afraid of the dark. Don't we have a nightlight somewhere?' Evan's voice asked and I shook my head in response.

“Uhh... how about I leave the door open with the hallway light on?” I offered and I heard her respond with a humming 'Mhmm' and could see her shadowed figure nod. Leaving the bedroom door open and the hallway light on, I gave her one final wave goodnight before heading off down the hall.

'Goddess this foal-sitting thing is hard. I've hung out with her before sure, but she was with her friends then. Actually watching over just her is nearly impossible,' I thought to myself. It didn't help that Trixie was out doing... magician things, Chrysalis was out and about doing changeling things. Discord wouldn't be much help and I was thankful he was at home with Fluttershy. Nightmare Moon, who would most definitely be the greatest help of all was out doing... whatever it was she did when she absconded to do her thing.

As I walked down the hallways, I bumped into Lassie, whom was carrying a rather large package, presumably one she had just received via mail. “What's in the box?”

“Something for my box. This one is supposed to feel just like a real dragon coc-” I cut her short, putting my hand to her mouth.

“I DON'T NEED TO KNOW!” I told her as I tried to shake the image from my head, Lassie just laughing with a slight chuckle near the end.

“Well you asked... nah, I'm just kidding. It's a new set of magic trinkets Trixie ordered a while back from some catalog. Something to really make her show spectacular and dazzling and... there's a few things in here I could probably use,” she smirked and I rolled my eye as I continued walking.

“Just make sure to disinfect it after,” I mentioned, Lassie snickering before asking a more down to earth question.

“Hey, where's the kid?” she asked and I pointed down the hall.

“Bedtime,” I replied, Lassie in turn giving me a stupid look.

“Whaaaa? This early? You're no fun,” Lassie commented before continuing on her way, no doubt to molest Trixie's belongings.

I flopped down on the living room couch, flicking on the television and watching the evening news. Evan's mind chuckled to me as we watched the broadcast, mostly covering tomorrow's forecast, which was usually a fore sure certainty since pegasus controlled the weather in Equestria.

It also covered other things, like upcoming events and such. I paid it no mind really as Evan brought up old memories. “Remember back when we were young, we used to call the news 'Old people cartoons'?" Evan asked allowed, myself chuckling as I too recalled ever wondering why people would ever watch something seemingly so... boring.

Then again, back when we were young, on our home world, we only ever bothered listening to the beginning of each broadcast, which usually began on stating what they would cover that evening...

Only later in life did we start listening and watching. Most of the time all the evening news would talk about was some vicious robbery that turned into a bloodbath, killers on the loose, drunk driving accidents... it was all so comedic to me then.

I didn't find the stories themselves entertaining solely on the subject material, but on the fact that the news broadcasts only ever seemed to primarily focus on the dark matters as opposed to joyous ones. However, here in Equestria the news seemed to be the opposite, always fun and lovey, talking about wonderful things like upcoming local picnics and rainbows and...

I stifled a laugh. “Gayyyyyy,” I mocked the news cast, Evan furrowing a brow.

“Come on Derreck, that's not nice,” he said in a lecturing tone, myself just rolling my eye as I flipped through a few channels. As the night went on, I eventually found myself watching late night TV with Evan's spiritual embodiment sitting beside me.

There were a couple talk shows and a few stand up comedians which were a hoot to watch, especially the ventriloquist. As the night turned into early morning, my head started to bob up and down as I struggled to stay awake. I struggled to keep my eyes open, my body drained and nearly screaming out in exhaustion. I wondered to myself at that moment why I was even fighting to stay awake. I kinda needed a nap to begin with...

* * *

Brief visions blurred through my mind, blinding me painfully. Ones of failure... of defeat... rejection, quickly flashing before my eyes but leaving as quickly as they came.

In Baltimare, when we were briefly betrayed by Discord in our first battle against Freeze... and the loss of my eye as a result... both Evan and myself lost our eye that day...

Tristan... how he cruelly enslaved Ponyville and even raped his own sister. How Evan actually hesitated to shoot him, even if the fact was he had no previous knowledge of Tristan's sinister acts towards his sister... how I even tried to force Evan to squeeze the trigger but he fought against the urges I put on him... how when he finally did squeeze, the shell had a hang-fire and nearly killed us both...

How his mother... his real one... no matter how hard either of us pushed, how we were never good enough for her. Always rejected. Strength, endurance, masculine prowess, fates against all odds, marksmanship... even miraculous academics... nothing satisfied her, not even earning acknowledgment of his existance. Never the less, nothing drove him... us, harder than the prospect of winning her love and acceptance... all for nothing in the end...

I grunted in pain... blood dripping down my face. My feet ached in pain, walking along the burning coals of damnation. Fires burned all around me, molten lava spewing up in geysers, the admittance of heat, though so far away, was excruciating.

Time seemed to slow as a hellish figure stood before me. My stomach twisted as my heart sank. I couldn't understand why I felt this way but for some unknown reason I felt so betrayed...

Everything faded out as a gentle and soothing voice spoke to me. “What troubles your dreams?” Moon asked, the goddess of eternal darkness fluttering down beside me. I tried to retrace my memories but couldn't muster the ability to do so.

“I... I'm not sure really...” I replied as I tried to search my thoughts. Nightmare held me tight and took me into a loving embrace.

“Perhaps think of better things. The filly. How are you finding foal-sitting?” she asked, myself sighing.

It had only been an afternoon so far, and already it was turning out disastrous. I had hung out with her and her group of friends before, but never solely watched over her alone. “Not well... I never thought it would be so hard to... she has problems with the dark, wants me to read bedtime stories... hell, I'm wondering if she can wipe her own ass,” I remarked, Moon giving me a look... 'that' look.

“Perhaps you should embrace it. Learn to do things the way she likes while also teaching her different avenues but not forcing them upon her,” she offered me intellectual insight, something I... wouldn't have expected to come from her.

“That sounds... I dunno, I never expected to hear you say something like that,” I replied, Nightmare giggling.

“I'm going to be a mother soon, yourself a father. There is much for both of us to learn if we want to become successful parents.”

Parents... a mother... I just hope we could give this kid a better childhood than what I got... what Evan and I had... I hoped Nightmare nurtured the foal well.

Parents... a father... hopefully one that would actually be in her or his life... not like Evan and my father...

Parents...

Parents... that one word seemed to be echoing throughout my mind...

* * *

I awoke to a slight poking at my stomach, one that startled me slightly. I nearly jolted as I shook my head in daze, Alfred standing before me, his nice little mustache neatly trimmed above his lips and his suit finely tailored. A look of... something between slight disappointment and wonder, expressed across his face.

“Sir, I don't mean to pester but it is Monday... should Ms. Scootaloo not be at school?” he asked, very inquisitively in that English accent of his. Funny, for a mob butler, I'd figure him to have an Italian accent but I guess not...

In my daze, I didn't even notice the little filly curled up against me on the couch, snoozing peacefully. 'The hell is she doing out here?' I thought for a moment before looking to my watch. “Shit!” I hissed to myself, realizing it was rather late in the morning.

I stood up, which stirred Scootaloo and led to her waking up as well, with a long yawn and a stretch. Rubbing her eyes, she looked to me with a sleepy bedhead expression. “Uhm... come on, we gotta go. Crap, we're gonna be late,” I swore quietly to myself.

Scootaloo was a little confused at first but quickly clued in that we had both slept in. Not giving anything a thought, I hurried out the door and to Juggernaut, whom I quickly fired up. I looked to Scootaloo who I gave a wink. “Don't worry, we'll get there lickety-split,” I assured her. Truthfully I would've liked to have taken the Torino but it was still in repair.

Dropping the battle truck into gear, we took off at a rather speedy pace. Scootaloo's stomach grumbled first, followed by mine and I realized something rather disastrous. I hadn't made her neither breakfast nor a lunch.

Oh goddess, not even a day and I was failing dismally at this. Then it dawned on me. “Wanna stop at Tim's?” I asked and Scootaloo looked at me with a curious stare.

“Who's Tim?” she asked and I chuckled briefly.

“I meant the doughnut shop. Tim Horseton's,” I replied and her wings sprang out.

“Can we please? I'm really hungry!” she chimed and I nodded. Maybe I wasn't so bad at this foal-sitter thing after all...

* * *

Juggernaut pulled up in front of the establishment and I hurried Scootaloo inside. We were already running late as it was. Stepping up to the cashier, I smiled to Mary, whom waved back to me with a similar smile.

“Mornin',” we both greeted each other, Mary already typing away at the register machine.

“What'll you have today?” she asked and I bit my lip, looking to Scootaloo and motioning for her to order.

“Welllll... I dunno, what are you gonna have?” she asked, putting me on the spot. I just rubbed my eye with a groan. Running late and the kid was dilly-daddling. Just what I needed.

“Mmm... can I have an espresso with a jelly doughnut...” I trailed off and let the kid order next.

“Me too!” she exclaimed, both Mary and myself raising a brow to her order. “Whaaaat? I've drank espresso before! Remember? On Hearth's Warming Eve!” she exclaimed, reminding me that I pretended to make her an espresso but gave her hot chocolate instead.

About to interject, I remembered that I wouldn't have to deal with her today... her teacher would. A sly grin coming across my lips, I nodded to Mary. “Well, she's right... order up,” I informed her. Mary, still as ditsy as ever, ended up mucking the order which came out wrong and over priced but I paid anyway out of... my own stupidity I guess.

As Mary grabbed our things, Scootaloo gasped in realization. As Mary handed us our order, which included hash browns, three extra breakfast sandwiches and a tea, Scootaloo expressed her excitement.

“YOU'RE A BLANK FLANK!” she exclaimed, Mary gulping as her tail wisped to her flank, covering it shyly as she was obviously self-conscious about it.

“Scoots,” I nearly hissed but she looked to me in utter excitement.

“This is so great. You can come crusading with me and my friends! We're trying to find ours too, see?!” she exclaimed, showing off her blank flank to the cashier mare whom seemed to settle a little. “We're always looking for new members and it would be so great to have an olde-” I cut her off by picking her up into my arms, along with our order.

“Okayyyyy... come on kiddo, we're running late.” I looked to Mary with a forced smile. “Sorry about the... you know,” I said, rolling my eye as I proceeded out the door.

“Awwww come on! She doesn't even know where the clubhouse is! How can she be a Cutie Mark Crusader if she doesn't know where the clubhouse is?...” Scootaloo continued to complain until we got to the truck and was placed in the passenger seat.

Scootaloo looked at our order with a perked brow. “We didn't order all this stuff...” she said as she looked at the hash browns, her jelly doughnut in hoof and already having a bite in it.

“Mhmm, I know. Mary is a good shi... gal. Cut her some slack. Besides, mow down on one of those sandwiches since you didn't get breakfast this morning. The other two can be for your friends and uhh... I'll give the tea to Ms. Cheerilee for... you being late,” I said, drawing out the plan.

Puttering around at a slow speed, we eventually pulled up to the schoolhouse, a good twenty minutes late. Opening my door, I grabbed my espresso and the tea while Scootaloo hopped out with the rest.

Stepping up to the schoolhouse doors, I opened without even knocking, Cheerilee going quiet and having obviously been right in the middle of something, the entire classroom going silent.

Looking to Cheerilee, whom gave me a rather dissatisfied look, I took a few steps over and handed her the cup of tea. “For you, ma'am. Sorry we're late,” I said with a half assed smile.

Cheerilee's expression changed a little as she got caught up in her words. “I... well that is to say... oh my is this?...” she trailed off with a sniff. “Mmm... I do so love tea,” she whispered to herself.

I looked back to Scootaloo whom was already sharing out her food. I raised my coffee cup to her. “I'll pick you up after school, okay kid?” to which she nodded happily. Giving one final tip of my hat before I left, I took off, contemplating what I'd do for the next few hours.

As I thought, all the surroundings came to my mind... I could feel... everything. From the grass to the trees... hills to the mountains... even ponies... I could feel all the happiness, irritation, joy, sadness...

I nearly jumped in my seat as I felt a sharp pain on a part of me that didn't exist. Like my wing had been broken. I groaned a long note of discomfort as it felt like I was trapped... stuck in a bed with nowhere to go and no one to keep me company... bad food...

Something in my mind snapped, like a light bulb had just been turned on and I headed back to Tim Horseton's. Pulling the truck up and leaving it running, I rushed back inside. Running up to Mary, whom was shocked to see me back, I placed a very specific order, telling her how important it was for this order to be correct.

Luckily enough she got it mostly right, save for an extra carton of chocolate milk. Giving her the payment, and an extra generous tip, I headed off to the hospital. I pondered to myself how I knew, how I could possibly be able to feel it. Rather than continue to struggle with figuring out an answer, I pawned it off as another mysterious power I had uncovered in this world.

Pulling up to the hospital, I slipped the truck into park and shut her down, figuring I'd be here for most of the day. Grabbing my takeout bag, I headed into the hospital but nearly gulped as I was presented with a seemingly impassible obstacle. I slipped back around the corner, pressing my back to the wall before slowly peeking back around for a better look...

That damned gray doctor whose wrist I broke. He also looked to still have a bit of a limp. 'Son of a bi...' my thoughts trailed off, a smile coming to my face as I thought of a brilliant plan of action.

Evan's voice came to my head. 'Oh Derreck... please tell me it isn't what I think it is...'

* * *

The doctor scribbled down a few more notes before handing the clipboard back to the nurse at the check-in counter. “So like I was saying. The stallion-” he was cut off as another nurse came to a stop with her trolly cart of condiments.

“Doctor. Care for some jello?” she asked, the gray doctor turning around.

“Why yes actually. Oooh, lemon lime, my favorite. You must have read my mind,” he said with faked smile, graciously taking one of the bowls and a spoon. With a nod the nurse continued on her way with the trolly while the doctor turned back to the receptionist nurse.

Just before he could start his story, she stood up. “Just one moment. I have to file this and then I'll be right back,” she informed him, zooming over to her filing cabinet. Looking down to his bowl of jello with a disgusted look, he scooped it out into a trash bin, thinking to himself how distasteful the hospital food was.

Leaning back on the counter just as the mare came back, he licked his spoon, making it seem like he had just finished. “Wow... that was fast. I don't know anypony who likes that stuff as much as you,” she commented, the stallion nodding with a sly smile.

“Mhmm, my hat is off to the...” His eyes had been wandering and caught sight of something that made his heart stop, nearly making him choke.

A cardboard box!

“Doctor? Is something... wrong?” the nurse asked, the doctor's face nearly pale white. He began to slowly trot over, only knowing of one pony... one man...

“Doctor, are you feeling alright?” the nurse asked as she watched the pale-faced doctor slowly walk over to the cardboard box which was labeled 'Fragile'. He slowly looked to his wrist, remembering how the man had broken it.

With an angered quiver of his lip, he slammed his front hoof down with all his might. There was a glass shattering sound that echoed in the receptionist area as the stallion crushed the box...

Glass cups smashed under the stallion's slamming power, several ponies turning to see what the commotion was about. The nurse nearly yelped in shock. “DOCTOR! What in Equestria do you think you're doing?!” she nearly cried, the stallion turning to her with a bleak expression.

“I... I... it...” he turned to the box and then back to her. “It's a cardboard box!” he announced, the nurse nodding.

“Yes indeed. One that was labeled 'Fragile'. What did you think was going to happen if you smashed it?” she asked, nearly frantically. The doctor simply sputtered as he tried to piece together his explanation...

Upstairs, the nurse pushed along the trolly cart of food and entered one of the many patient rooms. Pulling the cart up, the pegasus nearby sniffed her nose, smelling something most delightful and sitting up to see what it was.

“Care for some jello?” the nurse asked, the pegasus in turn shaking her head, thinking it to have been something else from the most intriguing smell which still lingered in the air. The nurse merely nodded, taking a tray of jello and offering it to some of the other patients.

“Psst... Derpy,” came a voice, shocking the gray pegasus whom in turn looked around. The cloth that shrouded the trolly shifted aside as Derreck crawled out from the underneath part of the cart and slipped under her bed. “Don't say anything...” he whispered, Derpy's facial expression one of complete and utter shock...

* * *

I watched from underneath my friend's bed as the nurse finished her route and proceeded to leave with the trolly, after which I slipped up beside Derpy's bed, pulling myself up a chair.

“Evan?” she asked in disbelief, myself wanting to tell her the truth but figuring it to not be worth the time.

“Yeah... here, I brought you something,” I told her, handing over the bag of freshly baked muffins, which were still warm. Her face brightened up as she let out a joyful squeal, tossing a whole muffin into her mouth. “Mphm... mmm... thanks,” she said, mouth full. I gave her a nod just as Evan's voice perked in my mind.

'That's very nice of you Derreck...' he said, myself nodding, both to him and Derpy. 'How did you know she was here?' he asked, not even a moment later Derpy asking a similar question.

“How did you know I broke my wing?” she asked, making myself wonder how I knew it was her. Weird enough that I was able to feel her pain and know her surroundings, it was stranger yet that I could identify her.

“Uhh... I just sorta... had a feeling,” I told her, just before she brought me into a hug.

“Thanks so much... the food here tastes horrible,” she thanked me, myself chuckling from her remark about hospital food.

“I know.” I leaned back in my seat as we chatted about a few things before she pulled out a game board.

“Wanna play some chess?” she asked, myself chuckling meekly as I sighed.

“Maybe something else? I'd like to at least have a chance,” I laughed and Derpy pulled out Scrabble box instead, her expression asking me if I would play. “Alright sure...”

Time passed as we played a few games of Scrabble, Depry winning an undisclosed amount of times... goddess, she was so good she made me look like a preschooler.

As I finished another word, Derpy spiked a specific conversation. “So, what have you been up to?” she asked curiously. I let out a sigh.

“Foal-sitting...” I nearly groaned, Derpy perking a brow.

“What's wrong with that?” she asked, hearing the tone in my voice.

“Ugh... I don't know...” I replied as she finished another word. “It's just so hard. I remember last summer, you, the kids... me... we all went out to the fair and it was so easy... but actually watching over a kid... it's been barely twenty-four hours and I'm having trouble keeping her entertained. Last summer I made them a kite with my T-shirt and it kept them going for the afternoon but now I only have one kid so...” I dipped my head into my palms.

“Taking care of a filly isn't just about having fun with them. You have to teach them stuff to,” she responded and I groaned. Maybe this elaborate plan of Dash's wasn't so elaborate after all. Spelling out a word, I sighed before speaking.

“Yeah, well I never thought it would be this difficult,” I replied, Derpy giggling in return.

“Well, you have to learn about kids sometime, right?” she asked, making me nod. She was right in a number of ways. I would have to learn, and not just because it's good to know, but because I was going to be an actual father soon...

“Yeah... I know. How about you. You know about kids?” I asked and she nodded quickly as she examined the board.

“Of course! I love foals,” she exclaimed, rubbing her chin as she thought about something. Before anything else could be said, she began laying down letters and I watched her spell the winning word of the match. 'Intercourse'. I dipped my head. She was so innocent about it, not implying anything by writing it, but irregardless...

I lifted my head to smile to her but saw something else that made me jump up. “Shit! Dammit I'm gonna be late!” I swore, Derpy's ear perking as I looked to the clock. “Sorry to go so soon, but I gotta split,” I informed her, giving her a quick hug and going for the door.

Just as I exited into the hallway, I caught wind of the gray doctor's voice, myself slipping back into the overnight patient room. Quietly closing the door behind me I moved over to the window, Derpy looking to me curiously. “Just thought you could use some fresh air,” I quipped, sliding open the window. “Adios.”

With that I dropped out of the window, coming down hard on the ground below but landing gracefully and running over to my truck. Hopping in, I looked to my watch. Class ended ten minutes ago. I huffed as I put the truck into gear and stomped on it like a madman.

In minutes I was at the school, only a few students left whom were just leaving, Scootaloo sitting by her lonesome on the schoolhouse steps. Pulling up in the truck, Scootaloo's head perked up as I wheeled around near the front of the school.

I stepped out and walked over to her. “Sorry I'm late kid. I-” I was cut off as Cheerilee stepped out of the doorway.

“Mr. Burdick. A moment please?” she asked, disappointment running deep in her voice. I nodded and gave Scootaloo a pat on the shoulder, telling her to just give me a minute. Cheerilee and myself stepped into the classroom, the mare closing the door behind us.

“I understand you're looking after Scootaloo for the next few days?” she asked and I nodded. “I know that... do you have any idea how difficult it is to teach a filly who's wired on espresso?” she asked, a chuckle escaping my lips. “You think it's funny?” she asked, not in the joking mood.

“No, I just...” another snicker escaped, partially through my nose.

“And her lunch?” she asked, making me realize I hadn't packed her one. Cheerilee must have seen my expression. “You're lucky Apple Bloom always has extra.” I scratched the side of my head with a sigh.

“I just... we were up late last night and slept in,” I lied partially. I was up, but she wasn't. Cheerilee let out a disapproving sigh.

“Evan I-” I cut her short.

“Derreck... please,” I replied, Cheerilee giving me a strange look.

“But I thought your name was Evan?”

“Burdy,” I replied, trying to find even ground.

“Okay...” she started, a little curious towards why I didn't want to be called Evan. “Burdy... I know that sometimes it can be a hassle and it can creep up and surprise you sometimes... but if it's too much for you to handle, please just tell me. I can watch her until Dash gets back. I just don't want anything bad to come of this,” she told me.

I nearly let out a sigh of relief. As much as I loved Scootaloo, it was already seemingly too much for me. Just before I could say yes however, my tongue seemed to get all twisted. I tried to speak, spit out the words... but I couldn't. Something was holding me back...

As I thought about it more and more, I slowly changed my mind. “Actually... I... we're good. It was just a fluke, I promise,” I told her. She gave me a serious once over then nodded.

“Well... if you change your mind,” Cheerilee offered, but I just shook my head.

“Nah. We're good... but thanks though... and I'm sorry. For the... espresso,” I apologized, Cheerilee just nodding as I headed for the door. Stepping out, I gave Scootaloo another pat. “Come on kid... we'll head home and I'll have Alfred cook you up something for dinner...”

* * *

I worked under the lights inside the garage, outside being pitched in darkness. Feeling an itch on my forehead, I wiped my palm across it, streaking smut and grit all over my face. As I continued working on my project, I heard the door open.

Looking over my shoulder, I saw Scootaloo. “Hey kiddo, how was dinner?” I asked, going back to work.

“It was good... Alfred was kinda upset because Lassie made a mess again,” she giggled, myself chuckling as I only imagined the scene. “I had Alfred put some aside for you,” she told me, a warm smile coming over my face as she said that.

“Alright, thanks...” I trailed off, trying to fit a bolt into place.

“And uhh... I uhhh...” she stammered nervously, her hoof doing circles on the floor. “Can you help me with my homework?” she asked. I lifted my head up, but didn't turn to look at her.

'Homework? Really?' I asked myself but before I could answer myself, words slipped out of my lips. “Yeah sure,” the words came out. 'What?! I wasn't going to say that!' I thought. I stayed knelt by my machine for a moment before deciding there was no going back on it now. Besides, how hard could it be?

I stood up and followed her back into the mansion, back to a table where she had some papers laid out. Sitting down, she began writing away but then stopped. I waited for a minute and she looked to me. “I forget how to do these ones,” she told me, sliding over the paper. “These are the ones I'm having trouble with.”

I looked at the homework papers, which had side notes written all over it. The question was mathematical, and read out '3+5x6'.

“That's easy. It's 48,” I answered, Scootaloo staring at me curiously and with a quizzical look on her face.

“It is?” she asked, almost baffled and shocked beyond belief but before I could answer, Evan took over.

“No, no... it's 33,” he answered, myself having a strange look on my face, Scootaloo more puzzled than before. “You see, it's called BEDMAS,” he began, Scootaloo picking up.

“Yeah-yeah! That's what Ms. Cheerilee was saying earlier, but I forget how to do it,” she stated, myself lost. 'What the hell is bed mass? What did the weight of a mattress have to do with addition?'

Evan slowly began to explain things in detail and I was further lost but at the same time glad that somepony here knew what they were doing...

That night Scootaloo crawled into her bed and snuggled up with herself. “Alright kid... I'll make sure not to sleep in tomorrow and uhh... yeah...” I trailed off, not knowing what to say. Remembering to leave the door open, I went to leave.

“Evan!... or, Derreck, or... whatever you like to be called... can you read me a story tonight?” she asked, myself biting my lip. I stood with my back to her for a long moment before walking to her bedside and kneeling down.

“Listen kid... I uhh... I'm not very good at this whole... foal-sitter thing okay.” I let out a big sigh before looking right into her eyes. “But I tell you what... I'm gonna start trying harder and uhh... it'll be like a learning experience for both of us. You can teach me what it's like to watch over a kid and... wait a minute...” I trailed off in thought as I remembered something, Scootaloo looking to me with a cocked brow.

“Actually... hold on, I think I can get a nightlight for you!” I said, coming to realization of something. Rushing out of the room, I hurried downstairs and to Lassie's room, entering without knocking.

Lassie nearly jumped up as she tossed away her magazine and threw her vibrating dildo across the room with a startled scream. The rubber toy bounced off the wall and continued to vibrate on the floor while the magazine landed in front of my feet, opened to a page with...

“WHAT?!” I gasped in disbelief, picking up the magazine as I looked at a picture with myself on it. I was standing in a stunning pose, shirtless and flexing... it was a photo from when I was younger and... when Evan was in control...

Lassie snatched the magazine from my hands. “Ahem... it may be your place, but I'd like a bit of privacy...” she trailed off and looked to the photo. “Mr. Likes to cuddle softly and please his mares to no end,” she snickered, starting to read a story about me.

“I... I don't wanna know...” I trailed off, not wanting to know why there was a picture of myself in an erotic magazine without my consent. It was, however, the first time I had seen a Playfilly magazine in the house, which was a change as I had only seen Lassie previously reading porn magazines geared towards males.

Lassie, as if reading my mind, nodded before trying to tease me. “Yeah, I picked this one up when I saw you were in it... goddess, it has me so wet... just thinking about you're huge, dominating body pinning mine to the bed... your muscular body over mine, big fat cock inside of my-” she cut herself short as I grabbed her big neon sign without paying her any mind.

“HEY! That's mine! I had to steal that thing from the Playcolt Mansion!” she wailed and I nodded.

“I'll give it back later,” I retorted, Lassie just scoffing.

“Whatever Mr. ...” She trailed off and looked back to the magazine. “Likes to pound his mares raw.” I just rolled my eye with another shudder as I left her room and headed back up to Scootaloo's.

Stepping into the room, I plugged in the sign, which glowed a neon blue. The writing read 'PLAYCOLT' with a mare lying on her back across the top of the words, wearing bunny ears and one of her hindlegs lifting and lowering in perfect intervals.

“There, how's that?” I asked, Scootaloo nodding. I hoped she was too young to know what Playcolt was, but irregardless. I once again knelt beside her and sighed. “Like I said kid... I don't know much but I'm gonna try my hardest, promise... and I'll teach you some cool stuff along the way, alright?” I promised...

* * *

The next morning went smoothly. I had gotten up early and started making breakfast; grilled cheese with ketchup, while Scootaloo made her lunch for the day.

Pulling up to the schoolhouse in Juggernaut, I left the truck running. Stepping out with Scootaloo's bag in hand, I escorted her to the entrance doorway, handing over her bag and looking to Cheerilee who rose a brow.

Scootaloo walked up to the teacher's desk and placed a big red shiny apple on it before looking back to me with a smile. I gave her a thumbs up and with that she proceeded back to her desk.

Cheerilee looked to me with a risen brow and I gave her an 'A-OK' hand gesture, Cheerilee just rolling her eyes but smiling genuinely nonetheless. I stepped outside, quietly closing the door behind me. As I headed back to Juggernaut, I spotted Applejack looking to me with a distasteful squinty eyed look...

* * *

We stood out in the field, Scootaloo holding the bat in her mouth. “Okay, now I'm gonna pitch it nice and slow, okay?” I told her, Scootaloo nodding quickly. “Alright, here it comes,” I said, pitching it slow.

Even with the speed, she still missed. I rubbed my chin with a bit of a sigh. Walking over, I guided her bat with the proper motion. “Just like this okay... and right...” I stopped the bat mid-stride. “Right here. I'm gonna pitch it right here, okay?” I asked, Scootaloo nodding.

Walking back over to my pitcher's spot I gave her a nod. “Okay... here it comes... try to time it. It'll be coming right where I said it would, okay?” Scootaloo nodding with the baseball bat still in her mouth.

Pitching it slow, she absolutely drilled it with all her might. My eye went wide as the ball zipped towards me. Zooming over my head, it clipped my baseball hat and took it clean off. Lassie called out from further back. “I GOT IT! I GOT IT!” She cheered, chasing after the ball. Scootaloo jumped up and down in excitement.

“Yeah, that's it kid! Now go on, run the bases!” I cheered her on, Scootaloo galloping at full speed...

* * *

I started to feel a little weird... almost all over my body. A weird fuzzy feeling churning in my stomach. I shrugged it off as I helped Scootaloo with her reading homework, Evan piping up every so often to properly pronounce a word I 'apparently' messed up.

As we finished the chapters she was supposed to read, she began to write up her followup of said chapters. Mostly stuff like things she liked and didn't like about the parts she just read, along with what she predicted to happen next.

I pulled out my own sheet of paper and began scribbling things down. Scootaloo looked to me with wonder. “What are you doing?” she asked, looking curiously to what I was doing.

“The same... I'll do my own little thing so that when we're done, we can both look back on it,” I said, Scootaloo smiling.

“That's a cool idea. Then we can both see what we thought, rather than just my answers!” she stated, Lassie snickering as she walked by us.

“You should read The Fifty Shades book,” Lassie joked, Scootaloo looking to her and then back to me.

“What's that?” she asked, myself just waving my hand.

“I... uhh, I'll read it to you when you're older... err... actually, not even then,” I stated, hearing Lassie laugh and while mentioning something about how chains and whips excite her...

* * *

Pulling up to the schoolhouse in Juggernaut, I went to get Scootaloo's bag but she herself grabbed it, looking to me with a smile to which I returned. “Ah-ha... alright,” I said with a smirk, escorting her to the steps.

Walking up the steps with her, I wished her a good day, giving a tip of my hat to Ms. Cheerilee whom looked back to me with an impressed smile. I watched as Scootaloo placed a big red apple on her desk before heading to her own. Turning to leave, I spotted Twilight across the street, looking to me with a slight expression of disbelief. I gave her a wave and she looked away, taking off in a hurry. Applejack had been standing beside her and she gave me a hussy look, like what I was doing was just to get under their skin and mask whom I really was.

Maybe it was... or maybe...

* * *

Scootaloo, Lassie and I sat on our stools in the pizzeria, all enjoying our slices of pizza for supper. Scootaloo struggled a little with her slices, which were still clung together. “Nah, nah, nah... here, let me show you,” I offered, folding them in the middle for her and showing her how to hold it.

Taking it like I showed her, she began to devour the pizza, myself smiling as I felt... different...

* * *

Scootaloo sat between Lassie and myself, the three of us near the back of the theater as we watched a cheesy late night horror movie. Lassie had picked it out and I made sure it wasn't anything pornographic, sensitive or otherwise something that one shouldn't show a filly.

Scootaloo watched in fascination, reaching over to me and scooping out some of the popcorn from my bag, having eaten all of hers already. As she crunched it down, Lassie looked to her. “Hey... psst, can I have some?” she asked, Scootaloo pointing to me. Lassie nearly crawled over top of Scootaloo and grabbed a generous amount for herself, a fair portion of her pile dropping to the floor as she sat back down.

The movie dragged on... and on... and on. At some points it got really interesting but being kid-friendly, there wasn't an overly great scare to the movie. Starting to doze off and not pay attention to the movie, I reached into my bag of popcorn which was almost empty thanks to Lassie's constant pilfering...

“BWALCH!” A scream echoed in the theater, making me jump and toss my popcorn into the air.

“GAH... Jesus...” I gasped, Lassie and Scootaloo both howling in laughter.

“Did that scare you?” Scootaloo giggled. I huffed and calmed my breathing. It really snuck up on me, mostly due to the fact I hadn't been paying attention.

“Y-yeah... yeah kinda,” I mentioned, then joined in their laughter about the foalishness of it...

* * *

As I tightened a lug nut on the machine, I heard Scootaloo's voice pick up from the door. “Is there anything I can do to help?” she asked. I had been sitting alone for most of the night working on it and truth be told... it was kind of a 'Me time' thing that I wanted to do alone.

I went to tell her 'No' but my voice acted on its own. “Yeah sure... k'mere kid. I'll teach you something you'll never learn in school,” I said, shocked by my own words but never the less not going back on them.

Scootaloo came over and watched me as I began to work on my project again...

* * *

The truck pulled up in front of the school and Scootaloo jumped off my lap in excitement. “I did it! I did it! Did you see that?! Did you see it?! Did you, did you?!” she exclaimed, myself nodding as I opened the door. Due to her size, she couldn't reach the pedals but I had let her handle the steering wheel and she drove all the way to the school from the estate.

As I stepped out of the truck, she zoomed up to the front door, even before I could close the truck door. I watched from the truck as she walked inside with a proud trot, setting the apple on Cheerilee's desk before turning and giving me a wave.

I just chuckled to myself as I waved back, going to sit back in my truck but not before I caught site of Applejack whom was staring at me with a rather irritated look. I gave her a friendly wave, one that was borderline cocky and arrogant. With that, she stormed off...

* * *

Lassie stood on her hindlegs at the backside of the couch as I guided Scootaloo. “Okay... now just wrap your front legs around her neck and under her arm kinda like... like uhh...” Her fore legs could barely reach each other and wouldn't really be able to perform the technique.

“Here, I'll show you... like this,” I said as I took Lassie into a choke hold. “Under one arm and around her neck and then... squeeze,” I said, applying pressure and Lassie gagging in result. “Then slowly... slowly start to bring them down,” I told her, lowering Lassie's body to the floor as she struggled in my arms. “And they usually won't be able to do anything... I mean, unless they're a unicorn,” I told her, Lassie's body going limp as I laid her on the floor and stood back up.

“See?...” I trailed off, Scootaloo giggling as she poked Lassie whom didn't respond. “Lassie?” I asked, the dog not responding but obviously alive due to her chest rising and falling. “Lass?” I asked, a little curious to if she was faking it or not.

Patting her face I came to realize I had knocked her out cold. “Yeah...”

* * *

I tried tightening up a certain bolt but my hand slipped and clipped off a sharp piece of metal. “Gahh... fffff.... shhhhh...” I held back my curses, Scootaloo sitting right beside me. She gasped quietly and quickly scurried off as my hand began to bleed rather profusely.

Holding my hand tight, I brought the gash to my lips, sucking on the wound and awaiting my healing factor to kick in. Just before I could start cursing, I felt a hoof tapping on my shoulder. Looking back, I saw Scootaloo holding a first-aid kit in her mouth.

I chuckled heartily then nodded. “Alright kid... alright,” I said with a smile, letting the filly patch up my wound with some medical wrap, regardless of the fact it was going to heal in a few seconds anyway...

* * *

Laying in bed with Scootaloo, we read through a bedtime story book I had Trixie pick me up while she was in town. I myself however, didn't read the entire thing, as I had Scootaloo read parts of it too, Evan helping us with the more difficult words.

As we finished up the story, I closed the book and stepped out of bed. “There we go kid. Have a good sleep, alright?” I said but before I left, I snapped. “Oh wait... actually... here, I picked this up in town today,” I said, pulling a little box out of my pocket.

Scootaloo looked at it curiously as I unboxed it. “Figured it might help you sleep better than... that thing,” I said, looking to Lassie's stolen Playcolt sign. Taking out the traditional plug-in nightlight, I showed it to her, Scootaloo smiling from cheek to cheek. I handed it over and she plugged it into the wall by her bed.

I stood up to leave but she called me back. “Wait... Eva... Derreck?” she asked, my brow perking as I turned back to her. “Can... can you... kiss me goodnight?” she asked, myself taken aback by the request.

“L-like... kiss you?” I asked, slightly hesitant, and she bit her lip.

“I... actually, never mind. Forget I asked,” she replied hastily, quickly trying to cover it up. My heart seemed to flicker, a little hurt by the fact that I even hesitated.

“Well, I guess... I mean, if you want, sure,” I said, Scootaloo looking back to me as I knelt down beside her. “Okay kiddo...” Planting a kiss on her forehead, I followed by taking her into a hug and stroking her mane. “Sleep tight... and don't let the bed bugs bite..." I trailed off and broke away from the hug, giving her a hearty smile. "And if they do, I'll beat the hay outta them,” I said foalishly with an equally goofy smile, Scootaloo smiling brightly as she giggled.

I kissed her forehead once more. “Goodnight kiddo. I looooo see you in the morning,” I stuttered on my words, starting to feel all mushy and weird. Tucking her in tight, I proceeded to the door, closing it gently behind me and heading down the hallway, contemplating what all these weird feelings were that were coming over me.

They just felt so... ughhhh...

* * *

Scootaloo, Lassie and I walked along the streets of Ponyville. Friday at last... goddess I remember the feeling when I was in school. Last day before the weekend... damn it felt good.

We continued along the sidewalk. Instead of driving, the three of us woke up extra early just to walk all the way to school. It was funny in a way... somehow, despite everything, the Everfree Forest didn't seem all that... scary, today. Instead it was quite nice, like an early nature walk before school.

Going to cross the street, Scootaloo stopped in her tracks and I looked back to her. She looked to me and rose her hoof. I blinked for a moment and Lassie nudged me. “Hold her hoof and walk her across the street, nitwit,” she commented.

“Alright, alright,” I said, taking her hoof and escorting her across the street, Lassie following like the faithful companion she was. Walking her up to the front doors of school I gave her a pat on the head and a hug. We were early today, but not by much.

“Okay kiddo... have a good day at school,” I said, Scootaloo hugging back before heading off, handing Cheerliee an apple as she walked through the door. Cheerilee herself nodded as she stood in the doorway, looking to me with an impressed expression.

“I have to say Burdy... I'm really... very impressed. I truly thought you weren't going to be able to handle it alone,” she expressed her previous thoughts and I nodded as I stood up.

“Well... you know what they say... never assume... and you were kinda right... I did need help,” I informed her, Cheerilee raising a brow but instead of telling her, I simply gave Lassie a pat on the head.

Cheerilee giggled before giving me a smile. “You're right... and believe me when I say, you've done a fantastic job,” she complimented before heading inside. I stood there and watched as Cheerilee closed the door.

Lassie spoke up from behind me, catching my attention. “Good goddess... Celestia have mercy on my soul! That look is gonna give me nightmares... oh wait, never mind, she's looking at you,” Lassie mentioned, myself turning my full attention to her. “Look,” Lassie mentioned, nodding off to something in particular. It didn't take me long to spot Applejack glaring at us... me in particular, with a most nasty, snarly, twisted expression... one that just oozed with loathing...

* * *

Scootaloo sat in the tub as I washed her down, the filly helping out. “Alright... we'll just get behind your ears and do your mane once more and then we'll try 'er out, okay?” I asked, Scootaloo nodding excitedly.

Washing behind her ears and soaping up her mane with sudsy shampoo, I finished washing her off. Unplugging the drain of the tub, I let all the water drain out, however just as I did, Scootaloo stood up and shook like a dog.

I clenched my eye shut as she splashed me. Finishing her shake, she looked to me with a timid giggle. “Ooops, sorry,” she apologized but I just waved it off.

“Nah-nah, it's alright,” I assured her as I stood up and handed her a towel. She began to dry herself off as I walked over to the vanity and grabbed a hoof towel, drying off my face. As I did so, I caught glance of myself in the mirror and took a closer, more shocked, look at myself.

My jaw hung slack as I blinked rather slowly, partially in disbelief. I patted my face to make sure but... but couldn't believe what I was seeing. I pulled off my eye patch and was put in further disbelief.

My deep scars had faded away... my damaged eye no longer had its hellish red tint and...

I looked different... not just the missing scars and damaged eye but... my facial features had changed. I looked like-

“Evan,” Scootaloo began, breaking my thoughts and catching my attention. “Is something wrong?” she asked as I further dried myself off. I was wearing a fine set of leather pants and a black T-shirt. My hair was styled nicely, flat topped just how I liked it. Turning to her I shook my head in response to her question.

“Nah, nothing's wrong. Come on, let's go try her out,” I offered, Scootaloo nearly squealing in excitement, nearly more enthusiastic about it than I was... and I had been working on it for months, not a mere few days like her. We walked into the garage and looked upon the project we had finally finished, having put on the finishing touches earlier before getting cleaned up to try it out.

Grabbing my leather jacket of the nearby work table, I slipped into it with ease and adjusted the collar to give myself a styling look. Scootaloo cocked her head and looked to me with a funny expression as she fitted her helmet atop her head. “You look weird,” she said, myself nearly gasping.

“Whaaaaat?!” I asked, baffled but quickly shrugged it off. She wouldn't understand. Hitting a switch on the wall, the garage door slowly rose open. Scootaloo and I rolled our project out onto the paved lane way turnabout in front of the mansion.

“Alright... pray to Celestia this thing works...” I said, Scootaloo jumping up and down excitedly. Holding the machine upright it dawned on me why Scootaloo took such interest in the thing. In some ways it kinda looked like a scooter... and she did like her scooter... or maybe the reason was something else entirely...

I took a seat then patted the area just in front of me. “Here, sit in front of me,” I motioned her, Scootaloo quickly slipping between my arms, sitting just behind the gas tank but still on the cushiony leather seat.

Sunlight gleamed off the glossy black paint of the machine, shining on the chrome parts of the engine and twin exhaust. Scootaloo's front hooves gripped the handlebars, my hands taking their respectful places close to hers.

Having ticked off Flim and Flam, they wouldn't build the machine for me, stating they were too busy... but they did at least form the metal for me and make the parts...

I thumbed the ignition and the machine rumbled to life, chugging a most iconic rumble that couldn't be duplicated by anything except a true genuine make and model...

I revved the engine, my heart fluttering from the sound. The look... the feel... the rumble... everything. I had make it to be just like Arnie's from the second Terminator film. “Does it work?” Scootaloo asked curiously, wondering why we weren't moving.

“Oh yeah... she works,” I said as I looked to the setting sun. The maiden cruise, on a fine Friday afternoon... something Scootaloo and I had worked on together... it just... everything felt so...

I reached into my chest pocket and pulled out a pair of shades, slowly placing them over my eyes before kicking the motorcycle into gear and riding off into the sunset. Perfect...

Author's Note

Well, there she is... finally getting to live out my dreams of being like Arnie. Ahem, anyway, cheers to everyone, hope all your guys and gals new year is going well.

I had this done on the weekend, edited and all, figures I forget to hit the submit button...

Chapter 72

'One last request...'

I stood up, wondering to myself who it could be at this hour, then came to the presumption it was probably Discord or Chrysalis. Scratching my back of an itch as I wandered down the stairs and to the front door, another report of knocks echoed.

“Yeah-yeah, I hear yah, I hear yah...” I called out, a small smile on my face from the thought of my friends. As I swung open the door however, my smile immediately died.

“Guh... Princess... Celestia... Luna... uhh!” I quickly took a bow, my stomach twisting as a shiver went down my back. Nopony outside my small circle of friends knew about Nightmare... and goddess forbid if either Celestia or Luna found out...

'DID THEY ALREADY?! Is that why they're here?!' I thought quietly, my mind racing.

“Please, Mister Parker, there is no need to be so humble,” Celestia announced in a friendly tone of voice, settling my anxiety. “I do hope we're not interrupting anything?” she asked with a friendly smile.

“N-no! No, nothing at all... uhh... please, please come in,” I offered, trying to make it as though I wasn't hiding anything.

Luna looked to me with a perked brow, one of curiosity but not suspicion. “You seem... unsettled, Mister Parker,” she mentioned and I swallowed deep, quickly changing my tone and demeanor.

“No, ma'am, I'm not,” I said with a rather blank expression, to which she cocked her brow even further, like I had seen her sister do so many times before.

“You're finger, you call them? They're twitching nervously,” she commented, to which I took notice.

“What? Nooo...” I said, my voice utterly devoid of expression, making me feel like an idiot. However, no sooner had I thought of my idiocy, did I laugh at a memory. Luna leaned her head back, shocked at my sudden change in demeanor.

“Something... you find humorous?” she asked, myself nodding.

“Sorry... there was a bad movie back on my home world with an actor who had a dopey moment and I... I just reminded myself of him when saying it like that... ahem, so...” I trailed off, hoping they would pick up on their reason for this unexpected visit.

Celestia and Luna both stepped forwards and began to take off their royal shoes. “Meh, don't worry about taking those off. I wear my boots around the house,” I offered, Celestia commenting jokingly in return.

“A house? It's more like a mansion. Why, the interior furnishing compares to that of the castle, wouldn't you agree sister?” she asked, Luna nodding in return.

I scratched my chin as I spoke. “Yeah but... don't ponies wear their shoes and boots and stuff in the castle all the time?” I asked inquisitively.

Celestia smirked with a slight chuckle. “I suppose...” she remarked and I gave her a nudge.

“Then come in, relax. My home is your home, you know?” I responded, Luna leaning over to whisper to her sister.

“He is much more relaxed in our presence than most,” she stated, Celestia nodding in return before speaking to me in a more serious tone.

“I'm afraid we must make our visit short, but however short it is, it is still very important,” she told me. “Come, let us walk, for our conversation should be private and away from open ears.” She began to trot down to the lower levels of the mansion, to which I followed casually, trying to hide my inner fears.

Luna trailed behind us but quickly got a look of immense... something, expressed across her face. I dunno what it was, but I passed it off quite quickly as Celestia got right to the point. “I have a favor to ask of you, Mister Parker,” she began.

“Derreck, please,” I directed her, to which a smile tugged on the side of her lips.

“Indeed. Well, Derreck, I have a favor to ask of you... a rather pressing matter has come to the attention of my sister and I,” she said, getting serious in tone which made my stomach sink.

'Does she know?...' I thought in a slightly panicked way. “Oh?...” I asked, trailing off to let her continue.

“Yes... and I'm afraid it involves someone quite close to you,” she mentioned, myself swallowing discretely to try and hide my still rising fears.

'Shit... fuck, what am I gonna do?!' I thought stressfully.

“Yes... that woman, the uhm...” she waved her hoof as though trying to think of the proper word to say. “The one from you world with the aircraft full of weapons... the uhm...” she trailed off again.

“Mercenary?” I asked, to which she chuckled with a faint laugh.

“W-well... well I was going to try and use a more polite word but if your comfortable with me addressing it as such, then yes. The mercenary woman,” Celestia mentioned and I brushed it off.

“Meh, we're not really 'close'. Just associates I suppose...” I mentioned. Luna spoke up, with curiosity in her voice.

“After all the fighting the two of you have been through together, we would have thought the two of you to have a bond of sorts,” she mentioned, still inspecting every little thing about the mansion.

“Well... we haven't been through 'that' much,” I commented, to which she perked a brow and countered.

“Curbing the coup d'état in the Griffon Kingdom?” she mentioned, myself shrugging. “Also, bolstering the revolution in Dragon's Lair?” she brought up another conflict we had fought side by side in.

“Well... I mean-” Luna cut me off with another.

“The evacuation of the villages in Zebrafrica from the tyrant warlord which you subsequently brought down in the following weeks?” she stated, myself dipping my head.

“Okay yeah... we've been through quite a bit together... but it doesn't make us close. It's a... well, she pays pretty good... err, the clients do and... I'm good at it but, I'm retired as of recent so...” I commented, to which Celestia inquired.

“So then, if you're retired, I... my sister and myself, are wondering if you have any play in her latest endeavor?” she asked, myself shaking my head.

“Which would be?” I asked curiously, her answer taking me off-guard.

“She's planning on offloading her entire arsenal to a criminal organization,” she mentioned, my jaw dropping. How did she know already? It was only yesterday Kianna asked me to come along.

“We will take that as a 'no',” Luna mentioned, seeing my bleak expression. “We shouldn't need to tell you this but this... deal of hers, poses a serious national security threat to the well-being of Equestria as a whole...” I dipped my head with a deep sigh.

As I looked back up, I saw Luna looking around with that estranged look on her face again. It was one of great wonder and curiosity along with some suspicion. “Something wrong?” I asked.

“I sense... something I have not felt in...” she trailed off and that's when it hit me like a freight train. She, of all ponies, would know... not just know, would feel, Nightmare Moon's presence as the duo used to be one in the same.

My stomach sank as I tried to think something up quick... and I did. “Oh... actually yeah... yeah there is something I should probably...” I trialed off as I waved them to follow me. “I probably should've told you both a long time ago after it happened but... well I just didn't know how to break it to you,” I mentioned, Celestia perking an interrogative brow.

“Well, what exactly is it?” she asked, myself shrugging.

“Well... let's just say it'd be easier to show you rather than tell you... plus I think you might want to see it for yourself,” I replied, the two princess sisters following me until we reached a room. “Just... uhm... try too... you know what? I'll just show you.”

I swung open the door, to which they both looked in blank expression, Luna's jaw dropping a bit as her mouth gaped slightly. I scratched the back of my head with a chuckle. “I uhh... heh-heh... had a bit of a weird encounter a while ago and came into possession of this baby and... well, believe me, I've been meaning to give it back to you but...” I trailed off as Luna slowly walked over and inspected her long lost weapon.

Celestia chuckled as she nudged me teasingly. “For a moment I thought the news would have been bad... something like... ohh I don't know... crazy, like Nightmare Moon was back,” she laughed, a shiver going down my spine.

Luna unsheathed the dangerous sword and admired it's grace as she slowly swung it about with bliss and elegance. Celestia gave me a nudge and motioned for the door. “Let my sister have a moment,” she told me and we both exited to the hallway, closing the door behind us before Celestia began to speak.

“So about this problem with Kianna-” I quickly cut her short.

“Princess... Tia... I'm sorry but I'm retired now,” I apologized. Normally I'd be inclined to help her in these situations but... funny to have it come from me but I just wasn't feeling the over the top action packed violence anymore.

“I'm sorry too Derreck, but there just isn't any other way. Believe me, if there was I wouldn't be here. But you can get closer to her than anypony. You're the only one who can do this,” she told me and I sighed.

“I'm retired,” I told her, to which she gave me a steely cold glare.

“Yes you are... with a known villain residing in a mansion you obtained through rather illicit means,” she told me, my stomach again sinking as my heart skipped a beat. “You may be able to pull wool over my sister's eyes, but the same cannot be done with me. I know about your romance with Moon... and to be perfectly honest I'm okay with that. I've seen that evil doers can change and it seems she has put aside her evil ways in exchange for new, better, ones. However, the matter at hoof cannot be ignored, for it threatens all of Equestria.” She... she was...

“You're... so that's it huh? Black-mailing me...” I muttered but she shook her head.

“That's all black-mailing is... a deal with no negotiations. Under normal circumstances you'd be arrested and thrown in the dungeons for harboring a villain such as her, along with all your other crimes... but I like you... I like you a lot... and I'm willing to give you a chance, a deal you can't turn down... because we're friends, and that's what friendship is all about, right?” she asked in a tone that was so truly genuine it made me wonder if she was clinically insane or just really good at making herself believable.

“Yeah... friends black-mail each other into getting the other to do what they want until they're no longer needed... err, I mean, make deals with no negotiations...” I remarked.

“Derreck, please, don't be like this... like I said, if there was any other way...” she trailed off just as the door to the room opened, Luna stepping out with The Shadow Blade slung across her back. Celestia extended her hoof to me.

“After this, we'll never bug you again. You can retire a national hero-” I cut her short as I shook her hoof in front of Luna, not wanting the subject of Nightmare Moon to arise in front of the younger sister.

“Fine... but no publicity... this is off the record...” I told her with a steely cold glare, to which she embraced me in a loving hug and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

“Thank you Derreck. I just knew we, and all of Equestria, could depend on you,” she said, putting on a show in front of her sister. Her attitude made my skin crawl... so much for the rainbows and sunshine that was my first impression of this world...

As we separated from our hug, I too put on the faked disguise in front of Luna. “You two wanna stay for some pizza or something?” I offered begrudgingly, though kept it internal, putting on a friendly exterior. Really though... Luna wasn't so bad, it was just her sister but... I suppose you don't remain Equestria's ruler for over millenia by being a goody-two-shoes...

Celestia smiled but shook her head. “We'd love to, but we have business back at the castle. Perhaps we'll take you up on that offer another time.” I just... oooh I wanted to... her attitude was almost smug...

However, much to my annoyance, I was put completely off guard as Luna leaned over and smooched my cheek, leaving a mark of blue lipstick. My cheeks turned a faint cherry red, making the lipstick ever more noticeable, as she spoke. “Thank you for returning my sword. It means worlds to me,” she replied before the duo took their leave, leaving me in the doorway alone, contemplating everything...

* * *

“We can't!” Evan argued back, and I pivoted on my heels, leaving my back to him as I swore. “We swore we were going to leave that life behind!”

I tongued around inside my mouth before turning back to him, pointing at him as I started to lose my cool. “NO! YOU... you promised to Twilight you were going to leave that life behind! I made no such promise!” I yelled at him, Evan's expression suddenly shocked.

“FUCK!” I cursed at myself as I stomped and put my back to him again. I could tell he was hurt that I took that tone of voice with him. “Goddammit how the fuck did this happen?” I asked aloud, Evan still silent for the time being as I rubbed my forehead.

“Are you sure Celestia said it like that?” he asked meekly.

“Sure as shit that the sun will rise in the morning... for fuck sakes...” I cursed, angry with myself... angry with Celestia... angry with everything. “Why the fuck couldn't it have been like this in the beginning? Back when we were both striving for action... shit we could've been the world's hero ten times over...” I muttered to myself.

“I dunno... it just seems... out of character for Celestia to act like that... don't you think?” he asked, speaking what I had been originally thinking.

“Yeah but she's desperate,” I replied, Evan staying silent as I explained my train of thought. “Never before has there been this kind of problem. Yeah there's been... super villains... twisted magicians... lords of chaos... but all that can be handled with friendship and Elements of Harmony and all that gay crap...” I trailed off as I looked to the empty expanse of nothingness.

"It's not really 'gay'," Evan mentioned. I turned back to him to say something but then decided to stay silent for a moment. Whatever it was, their ways of dealing with things was stupid and ridiculous.

As I turned to him I finished what I had originally been saying. “But never before has there been a threat of uprising with firearms. They never existed on this world until we arrived... until we brought them here... fuck as if guns are the problem here...” I swore, hating myself for having to admit that.

“There has to be another way. May-maybe we can pay Kianna?” he suggested but I shook my head.

“She'd never go for that... she wants what we have... and we don't have nearly enough money to get her that... and I don't think Celestia is going to go for negotiations with a gun runner... ohhhh FUCK!” I cursed, stroking my forehead before chuckling.

“What's so funny?” he asked and I just continued to chuckle softly.

“First it was you... then it was me... now it's Kianna...” I laughed softly, Evan raising an unsure brow. “Well... think about it... metaphorically speaking, you were the first to lay down your guns... give up on the action, the... give up on the 'life'... then it was me. Kind of... I met Nightmare... relived my old legacy but then decided it wasn't for me and tried to retire on a high note... you know, go golfing, sit on the porch, watch the sun set in the distance...” I trailed off, Evan picking up.

“And now it's Kianna... seeing what we had, and wanting to give up the violent life for something more soothing...” he came to realization with what I was saying. I nodded.

“But someone's always there to drag us back into the action... everypony forgets... nothing is forgotten...” I sighed deeply as Evan asked what was already decided.

“So what do we do?” he asked, myself just closing my eyes as I shook my head in shame.

“We do what Celestia asks... and maybe she'll keep true to her word and let us live the rest of our pitiful lives in peace... pfft, exiled to a mansion in the Everfree Forest...” I joked.

“But what about my mother... Twilight?” he asked.

“Why do you think I asked Celestia to keep this whole ordeal hush-hush?” I asked rhetorically.

“No I mean... I'm supposed to talk with her,” he stated but I just brushed it off.

“Yeah, but that's the day after tomorrow. We'll do this tomorrow... it won't take long... maybe an hour or two... they're based out of that old fuel station, remember?” I reminded him, going back on what Kianna told us.

“There has to be some other way... tell them what's going on... maybe she'll understand and take off... disappear?” Evan tried to reason. “She was our friend!” he yelled. “She trusted us!”

His words hit me pretty hard. Those were the same inspiration words I told to Echo Jewel. He was right. She, along with Dwayne... they were technically, in some way or another, our friends... and they did trust us. It's why it would be so easy for us to pull off... Celestia on the other hand... well. 'Damn... why can't things be like they used to... easy decisions?'...

* * *

I awoke soundly to the wet feeling Nightmare's soft lips kissing my cheeks. I cracked my good eye and gave her a faint smile. With her one fore-hoof, she brushed aside my hair and gave me a dreamy look.

“Morning...” I mumbled groggily. She brushed her nose against mine.

“Pleasant dreams?” she asked, to which I rolled my eye and shook my head.

“Unfortunately not... ugh... for fuck sakes... if only it were all just a dream,” I grumbled. Nightmare nuzzled against me.

“What are you going to do?” she asked quietly, whispering her words into my ear.

“I dunno...” I leaned back and looked into her eyes. “My... Kianna, Dwayne... they trust me...” I dipped my head with a sigh. Nightmare lifted my chin with a hoof, looking deep into my eye with her own.

“Whatever you do, I'll stand by you,” she said before planting a kiss on my lips. “And whatever it is you choose to do, follow your heart and it shall guide you.” I laid there for a moment with her, before stroking her soft, furry cheek.

“I'm... I'm going to do what's right. Then, I'm going to retire. Fuck the legend... fuck my legacy... and fuck this country. We'll leave it all behind. Me and you... and together, we'll ride off into the sunset, raise our foal somewhere nice,” I said, Nightmare smiling.

“On a nice countryside... waterfall nearby... overlooking the horizon... with a picket fence, and a nice dog named Chip to-”

“What's wrong with Lassie?” I asked to which she laughed softly.

“Right... sorry I got lost in imagination... yes, a nice dog named Lassie to play with our child on the front lawn,” she cooed before we embraced in a loving kiss. Goddess damn me to hell for what I was about to do...

* * *

Third person...

Dwayne sat before his tactical monitor, tapping away at the keyboard. Several monitors lay before him, displaying security footage of the surrounding area. Reaching over with his right hoof, he tapped a few buttons on his laptop. All the technology that had been brought along with Kianna absolutely stunned Dwayne to no end. Never before had he seen such devices in all of Equestria. It was truly something to behold.

Tapping away, his left hoof moved over to a soda bottle with a straw, bringing it over and taking a generous sip. Looking back to the screen, his reflection mirrored off the glowing screen as he sucked on the straw, drawing more of the beverage into his mouth.

His calm form was abruptly interrupted as a blaring noise was set off, making him fling his soda in fright. The liquid splashed on his computer chassis and the electronics fizzled out, some of his computer screens blacking out as crackles of electricity fizzled out.

“Fsshh shit!” Dwayne cursed wildly as the noise continued. Looking around frantically, he spotting a rapidly blinking light, which was hooked up to the source of the noise. Grabbing the land-line phone off the receiver, he brought it to his ear.

“YES! H-hello?! Hello! Hell...” Dwayne panted, having not expected the call and been caught off guard by it. “Hello?” he asked as he finally settled.

“Dwayne...” came a steely cool voice from the other end. Dwayne's eyes went wide with realization.

“Derreck?” he asked in confusion before he finally snapped back into reality. “Oh shit... that's right, Kianna said you might drop by for that uhh... hey, come see me by the fue-” he was cut off abruptly as Derreck spoke over him.

“Is Kianna there?” he asked and Dwayne sighed.

“No, unfortunately. She was waiting for you but then decided to go on her own. Hey, why don't you come over, I know where she went-” he was cut off again by Derreck.

“Dwayne listen to me, you're both in grave danger,” Derreck told him, Dwayne pausing for a second. He thought for a moment as a shiver went down his back.

“Who?” he asked.

“Celestia. There's no time to explain... is this call being recorded?” he asked, Dwayne looking over to all his surveillance and security equipment, namely to the recorder that was taping every word of their conversation.

“Yeah. Kianna has me-” he was cut off again.

“Grab all your equipment. Recording devices, security footage, everything. You and Kianna need to disappear and you can't leave them a trail,” Derreck told him. Dwayne's heart began to thump.

“How?” he asked over the phone.

“I'm gonna come pick you up. I've got some money for you guys... I've got a plan,” Derreck replied. Dwayne cursed to himself before quickly yanking plugs from outlets, jamming a duffle bag full of equipment, and grabbing all his necessities. Reaching over for his one surveillance laptop in a hurry, he accidentally knocked it off the back off the table which was nearly butted up to the wall. Swearing to himself, he leaned down in his wheelchair and attempted to grab the fallen laptop.

Looking at the device as he attempted to reach it, he watched as the monitor displayed Derreck's battle truck pulling up outside. Dwayne wondered for a moment where he had called from but quickly brushed it off. “Son of a bitch!” he swore, looking to the power cord which was still plugged into the laptop.

Reaching for it, he yanked on the cord and tried to hoist the entire laptop to himself. The plugin on the laptop however, failed to support the weight and came undone, the laptop falling off the plug and still out of his reach. Looking to the screen, Dwayne watched as Derreck got out of his truck, waiting for him.

“FUCK!” He yelled, throwing the power cord across the room and knocking out a light. That's when an idea came to mind. Quickly looking around, he grabbed his soda bottle which still had a few sips worth left in it. Wheeling himself over to a large power outlet, he dribbled the rest of his beverage onto the electrical outlet, shorting out the power and causing the breakers to trip, cutting out most of the power, namely to those of the surveillance equipment.

“There... even if somepony was able to get the laptop running again... they'd think Derreck came and clapped me...” he assured himself, knowing that would be a viable story for Derreck to tell the princess so he and Kianna could disappear in peace.

Just before he left, he rolled back to his desk and retrieved his H&K pistol before wheeling away in a hurry, duffle bag loaded to the back of his chair. Racing outside, he spotted Derreck by the refueling tanks, door to his truck open.

“I sure hope that thing has a handicap ramp!” Dwayne called out with a laugh, a smile wide on his face.

He kept wheeling his way towards Derreck, however, ever so evidently, he started moving slower and slower. Things started to become apparent to him. If they were in a hurry, why didn't Derreck park closer... with the passenger or back hatch door facing him...

Dwayne came to an even slower pace as he saw Derreck's expression... and finally saw his gun, drawn from its holster with the hammer cocked back. Dwayne came to a stop with his wheelchair, sighing as he leaned forwards, sitting on his haunches.

“Huh... clever... hahaha... ha... ain't this grand...” he laughed heartily. “Kianna wasn't here so... you got me to cut out all the surveillance feeds so that when she does arrive... you can catch her off guard too because she won't suspect you... hahaha... yeah, jeez, can't believe I fell for that one...” Dwayne muttered with a chuckle.

“It's how it has to be... I'm sorry,” Derreck apologized, his handcannon never wavering in the slightest as it remained at his side.

“I know... we just... kinda wanted what you have... living off the grid in some... swanky mansion... free of the world's vices... it's just kinda hard to accept this, you know?” he asked and Derreck nodded.

Dwayne slowly drew his own pistol out and looked at the engraved slide. “Haha... she always thought I was a bit of a pussy, you know?” he asked, Derreck giving him a solemn look. “Guess I'm even going out like one too... but I suppose...” he pointed the gun towards the empty expanse and popped off three rounds before aiming it back to the warehouse and popping off three more rounds.

Looking back to Derreck he quickly snapped a round off at him that grazed his arm and drew a bit of blood, some splattering to the ground. “Say there was... a gunfight and shots were exchanged... hell I even clipped one of the bastards but... uh-oh...” he racked on the slide of his pistol and forced the gun to malfunction with a failure to feed. “My gun jams and the group of bad guys get the upper hoof on me...” he wheeled closer to Derreck as the big man looked to his bleeding arm which quickly sealed up as his healing factor kicked in.

“Why didn't you just kill me?” Derreck asked, Dwayne shrugging in return.

“Even if I did manage to somehow kill you, which nopony prior has been able to achieve... they'd just send somepony else. Besides... this way at least... we're still parting as friends, you know?” he said. “And... at least this way... Kianna won't think I was a pussy in my dying moments...” he spoke with a soft-hearted voice as he leaned back in his chair for his last moments.

“I'm sorry,” Derreck apologized one final time, Dwayne nodding in response.

“I know...” Dwayne replied as he looked death in the face. Derreck rose his cannon and put a round straight through Dwayne's chest, blowing out his heart and killing him instantly. The force of the gunshot was enough to cause Dwayne's wheelchair to roll backwards, blood gushing from the hole in his chest.

Taking a step behind the wheelchair, Derreck grabbed the duffle bag of equipment, slung it over his back and headed towards his truck. Stopping for a moment, he looked to Dwayne's pistol which lay on the ground, sun shining on the frame which reflected the engravings...

'Amicitia est magicae'

* * *

Derreck's perspective...

I knelt down beside the Gran Torino, polishing the rims and thinking to myself. 'Goddess... what have I become? A simple hitpony for the princess... and assassin with no morals?'

Every time the thoughts came to mind, I pushed them away with the assurance that I was doing this for my wife-to-be... for my foal-to-be... for my future... but it always brought on the thoughts that everything I had done had been for selfish reasons... it was all for me... and everything in my mind kept running in the loop.

I looked out to the afternoon sun, still thinking about what I had done earlier this morning. Looking back to the car, I began to polish the rims again. If only somepony would tell me what I did was right...

I heard a gasping and hack come from the roll-up garage door. Nearly jumping to my feet I watched as a bloody, battered Kianna stumbled into the garage, M16 with grenade launcher in hand as she coughed and swore. “Fuckers...”

I stepped back cautiously. I didn't have my handgun, or any gun for that matter, with me at the time. I was dressed in my greaser coveralls and tank-top. Kianna stumbled forwards, cursing wildly but never once drawing her gun on me.

“Fuckers killed him! THEY FUCKING MURDERED HIM!” She screamed, a shiver going down my back. What was she going on about...

She stumbled forwards and I lurched ahead to catch her as she fell. She was bleeding from a few gunshot wounds. None were fatal, or at least not to my knowledge. “They fucked... ack!” she began to cough and hack, spitting more blood out of her mouth. “Shitheads... fuckers... fucking mobsters!” she yelled, to which I was put in further confusion.

“Kianna... shit hold on!” I stammered, laying her down on some cardboard that I would lay on when working under my vehicles. Rushing over to the far garage wall, I grabbed the first aid-kit before hurrying back over to her.

I could easily just finish her off here and now but... something was way out of place. Why was she cursing mobsters, claiming they killed him... assuming 'him' was Dwayne.

Pulling off her tattered tank-top, I quickly began dressing her wounds, Kianna cursing the whole time. “Kianna... what the hell happened?” I asked seriously.

“They killed him... they fucking killed him... fuck!” she coughed.

“Who?! What?!” I asked in utter confusion.

“Dwayne... those fucking Liotta thugs... they fucking clipped him!” she screamed.

'What... what, no... how did the Liotta's...' I thought silently. “What do they have to do with this?” I asked in a serious tone of voice.

“Everything! The guns... Dwayne! THIS!” she screamed motioning to her own injuries. I was still lost in confusion.

“What do you mean? I don't understand... how the fuck are they part of this?” I asked. She finally calmed herself for a second as I finished dressing her wounds and let her slip her tattered tank top back on.

“I lied to you...” she told me, making me raise a brow.

'Lied about what?' I thought as I sat down on the concrete floor and leaned my back against the door panel of my Gran Torino.

She leaned her back against the wall across from me, coughing lightly but finally over her initial shock trauma. “It's a nice car,” she told me, myself looking back at the beast and nodding as I gave the metal panels of the body a slight rub. “When you gonna let me drive it?” she asked, a little disoriented but myself shaking my head as I tried to bring her back.

“Not anytime soon... back on subject... what do the mobsters have to do with all this?” I asked seriously.

“You know those... third-worlders I was planning on selling guns to?” she asked and I nodded. “Well... they weren't from the third world... nor were they in anyway living in serious oppression... or... or anything that I told you. It was all just a lie,” she informed me, my brow raising.

“So... who the fuck was it?!” I snapped, Kianna chuckling.

“The same ponies who got you what you have today...” she stated. My first thought was Flim and Flam... but that wouldn't make much sense. Second thought that came to mind was Old Applenathy of the museum, whom essentially made me rich but that didn't make sense either. Finally I came to realization...

“The fucking Liottas?” I yelled, Kianna chuckling.

“Bingo... I kinda figured you'd react like this so... that's why I told you they were third-worlders. Figured you wouldn't be the wiser,” she commented.

“You can't give the fucking mob guns!” I roared to which she just rolled her eyes.

“Oh you're one to talk... Mr. All High and Mighty. They made you who you are... gave you a mansion... made you rich... a made-stallion... nopony can touch you... I wanted that... hell, half of that... fuck, even just a quarter... and I was willing to do whatever it took so me and Dwayne could just...” she waved her hand carelessly. “Not give a shit about anything anymore.”

“By giving the fucking mob guns! They're criminals!” I yelled as I stood up, Kianna just nodding.

“What would you have done in my situation? Oh right, you don't have to think about that cause you already did it...” she snapped at me as I turned my back to her, stressing as I gripped my head of hair.

I took a deep breath and exhaled before turning to her. Obviously something had went south or she wouldn't be here... all shot up like this. “So what happened?” I asked wonderingly.

“Broke rule number one of gunrunning,” she grunted as she stood up. I blinked and thought to myself before turning back to face her.

“Which is what?” I asked, motioning with my right hand for her to tell me.

“Don't get shot with your own merchandise... bastards got greedy I guess... decided they didn't want to pay... and tried to shoot me down. I escaped same way you did... down the river,” she mentioned.

“Down the river?” I asked and she nodded, bringing up an old memory of Evan's.

“When we first met... had our first confrontation... you took the leap of faith off that waterfall... I kinda had the same idea... fall down into the rapids and off the waterfall... better chances than trying to stand my ground against all those guns... which is why, originally, I wanted you to back me up on this,” she told me, my frustration going through the roof.

“So now... what you're saying is that... these fucking mobsters have enough guns to essentially overthrow... oh for fuck sakes...” I muttered to myself as things got a whole lot more complicated.

Even if I did just whack Kianna here and now, I know for fact Celestia would recruit me to deal with this oncoming epidemic. The problem of my life is the thing I cherish oh so dearly. “And they fucking killed Dwayne... just came back and... I found his body at the fuel station. There was a gunfight and... I think he got one of them but his gun jammed and... who the fuck kills a pony in a wheelchair?!" she asked aloud before grimacing from the pain of her injuries. "I'm sorry alright! I just wanted what you have... and seeing as how you got what you have from the Liottas I figured they'd be the ones to go to!”

I placed my left hand over my face as I groaned. 'Nooo... things can't be simple anymore... they have to be complicated and difficult... fuck, why couldn't things just be the way they used to be... all cuddly and shiny and gay...' I thought to myself.

“Okay so... you tried dealing some guns to the mobsters out in Manehatten?” I asked and she nodded. “But they double-crossed you, killed Dwayne and took your guns?” I asked, Kianna nodding.

“So how the hell did you get back so fast? From Manehatten I mean?” I asked, to which she shrugged.

“Took a leap into the rapids... woke up just outside The Everfree in shallow water and made my way to the fuel station and... well here I am,” she commented. 'No... she couldn't still have her plane because that would make it too easy,' I thought to myself. I rubbed my eyebrows, trying to sooth my eyes as I took it all in.

Kianna grunted as she loaded her rifle. “So what are you gonna do?” she asked...

Author's Note

BOOM! Stuff just got complicated. I'm really sorry about the long wait but I got really busy and ended up twisted my wrist trying to screw around with a 6ft katana sword. My buddy said I can't wield it with one hand but... well, I'm a monster that can wield shotguns with one hand so I figured... anyway I twisted my wrist, cock-suckin' sword weighs more than most of my guns. Ahem, point is, I'm sorry, I'm an idiot and yes... if you're reading this (You know who you are) you were right. You can't wield it with one hand...
Anywho, hopefully (I'm almost positive I can get the next chapter out quicker, cause it's a cliffhanger and we all hate those) I can get the next chapter out quicker... sorry again for the wait

Chapter 73

Author's Note

I apologize for taking forever with this chapter too, but I had the chapter written within the first week, I just hadn't edited yet and then... well, I got a .45ACP 1911 and... well... anywho, I lost track of time and when I finally snapped back into reality I realized "Oh shit... yeah." So I'm very sorry for the delay, but hey... I like guns... and big guns are really, really, really fun. Cheers...

Chapter 73

'One last ride...'

Twilight's perspective...

I sat with myself, patiently waiting... the anticipation killing me. 'Maybe I shouldn't be too hopeful about this...' I thought, my heart ticking a few beats quicker than normal. My tongue gently rubbed against my lips as I swallowed deep.

Maybe he wasn't really that bad. Maybe I had judged him a little harshly...

I looked to my clock and saw yet another hour had passed but I merely brushed it off as nothing. It was still pretty early in the day, only being eleven o'clock...

I kept thinking back to all our romantic times together. All those nights out, dinners under the stars, late night movies with Lassie. Even the not so romantic times like when him and Dash got us kicked out, or when we'd be removed for bringing Lassie into a restaurant.

I leaned a cheek into my hoof as I sighed contently. All those good times...

Another hour passed by without much thought...

And another...

And another...

I looked to the clock in a curious way. Surely he would be here before dark. I was a little surprised to say the least, he was in many ways an early riser and liked to get around. So why-

My thoughts were cut short by a knocking at the door, which I quickly shot up to answer. Rushing over with a smile, I swung open the door. “Eva!-” I cut myself short as I was met by Sweetie Belle.

“Hi Twilight! Is Spike home?” she asked in a rather joyful tune.

“Yea-yeah... yes. Spike!” I called out, the young dragon hurrying down the stairs.

“Coming Twilight!” he called back as he scampered down the stairs in a rush. Running up, he came to an abrupt halt as he saw Sweetie Belle at the door. “Oh... heh-heh... h-hey Sweetie Belle,” he fumbled stammeringly with a bright blush.

Sweetie Belle looked to me with a bright smile. “Twilight, can Spike come play with me? I'm meeting up with the other crusaders and we're going crusading!” she chimed. I smiled faintly as I looked to Spike and motioned with my head for him to go play.

“Thanks Twilight. I'll be back to finish the chores later!” he said in an excited tone as both he and Sweetie Belle quickly took off, giggling together all the while. I leaned in the doorway with a sigh, watching the duo run off into town. The afternoon sun glimmered with an orange haze, basking the world with the day's last bit of warmth.

Trotting back over to my seat, I began to daydream again, thinking back on the good times we all had together. Spike, Lassie, Evan and myself... a family...

A thought began to surface in my mind. A thought not just about Evan but about his... motherly issues, along with that other half of himself. When he physically changes and refers to himself as 'Derreck'. I had never seen such a transformation.

While similar to that of Luna and Nightmare Moon, it differed in the fact the two changed on a constant basis. It was a true mystery...

Another hour passed and I sighed to myself, getting up to pour myself some tea. Trotting into the kitchen, I put a pot of water to boil before mingling over to the cupboards and taking out some tea bags...

Another hour slowly passed as I waited patiently in the library living room, my hoof tapping in periodic rhythm against the floor...

Another hour and I bit my lower lip. 'What if he doesn't come?' I asked myself in worry. 'No... no he'll show up... he will... I know he will...'

I took a deep breath and tried to relax yet no sooner had I, then the door opened. I sprang up, almost joyfully, as I scampered over. “Evan!” I announced but was abruptly bewildered when I was greeted by Spike and Sweetie Belle, whom looked at me with a strange expression.

“Wha...” Spike began in confusion.

“Oh... heh-heh... Spike. Sorry, I thought you were Evan,” I mentioned stammeringly, which only made Spike raise a brow.

“Why would you think I was Evan? Didn't you tell him to leave and not come back because you didn't want to see him anymore?” he asked then quickly sucked in, covering his mouth as he realized what he said.

His words... so simple and calm, struck me like a fright train, really hammering me where it hurt. I nearly stumbled forwards as tears began to water in my eyes. I had told him that, or something along those lines, after his court trial when I found out he was a cold blooded killer.

“UGH! Twi! I didn't mean to say it like that!” Spike rapidly apologized, alas it was too late. The damage was done but he was right, and I was foolish to think Evan would show up. I whimpered a sorrowful sob as I scurried away to my room...

* * *

Derreck's perspective...

I remained hidden in the thickets, looking out to the rather open field where the Hercules cargo plane sat stationary. Squinting my eye a bit, I scanned the area, spotting several Liotta goons...

'Ha! Me, calling them goons. These stallions, they used to be my brethren...' I thought silently.

'We don't have to do it this way. We can talk to them. Derreck! Please, just try to reason with them. We're in incredibly good standings with Mr. Leone and he'd listen to us and what we have to say,' Evan pleaded from the back of my mind.

'Doubt it... and even if he did listen, what's he gonna do? Just hand over all the guns for nothing? HA! He'll want something just as valuable and I don't know that Celestia would appreciate us conspiring with Kianna...' I remarked back.

'And why did we have to kill Dwayne? Why didn't we reason with him?! There has to be a more-' I cut him out, forcing him away and into subconsciousness. There would be no negotiations... no peace talk... that much I was sure of.

“Are you sure about this?” Kianna asked through our two way ear piece communications set.

“Not you too,” I grunted.

“What?” she asked back.

“You're not seriously having second thoughts,” I grumbled, Kianna nearly laughing.

“No, not at all... well, maybe just one, but... seriously? This isn't an eighties action flick or some convoluted action story. You really wanna just go in guns blazing?” she asked and I laughed.

“Fast and hard. Take them off guard and hit 'em where it hurts... just stick to the plan,” I replied, Kianna chuckling to herself.

“It's your funeral,” she mentioned.

“Just don't be late...” I joked, fitting Evan's 'Arnie' cigar into my mouth and chewing on it slightly. This was gonna be one helluva battle. These guys outnumbered both Kianna and myself... outgunned us... and had home field advantage.

All we had was the element of surprise and hopefully better training. After all, there were no serious types of firearms in this world before us. I took a heavy inhale. Was this stupid? Yes, very much so. Was this necessary... that could be questioned. Was I about to pussy out... fuck no.

Fitting the Eagle Eye over my good eye, I racked back on my AN-94's bolt. 'What an ugly gun...' I thought to myself as I tightened up my combat boots just that little bit extra too make them a little too-tight.

Standing up, I slipped on a battle vest, courtesy of Kianna and fitted with hardened plating. I made diligent to fasten the vest as I had my boots. Fitting magazines into the pouches for my rifle, I also slipped some extra magazines for Evan's handcannon into the vest as well. Reaching down to my left leg, I strapped my hulking Bowie knife to my outer thigh, sheathing it for a possible close quarters fight.

Pulling out a tube of face paint, I applied black stripes to my face and exposed arms. Gripping the AN-94 rather tight in my hands, I took one final deep breath before stepping out into the open, still undetected.

I closed my eye for just a split second and let it all set in. How far I had come since the beginning... how things had changed since then... and how they were about to change...

At first I was a little slow, my gear all jingling as I ran ahead at full mast. With a huff my body began to ascend it's limits, a red fume dusting off my heels. I remembered so vividly my battle with the Teumessian fox, and the gift he... err, she gave me. It better have been a she...

My body began to move at a tremendous speed, so much so that I started to become a blur of motion. Ahead, one of the posted sentries spotted me, which was a given since I was the only moving thing in the vast openness.

He tried to scream something out but was silenced by the sudden and very brief chatter of my rifle which spat out a two round burst faster than one could blink their eye.

The others all froze, sentry patrols halting in their tracks. I ripped off a barrage of sudden bursts that cut down several sentries before anypony could mobilize a defense.

In mere heartbeats my gun was empty and I was reloading on the move as yelling and hollering became the norm. Unicorns grasped their weapons with magical auras while several pegasi took flight.

In moments gunfire erupted, bullets flying all through the air as everything was silenced out in one massive barrage of lead death. Tracers whizzed by me at incredible speeds, bullets kicking up dirt around my feet as I charged foolishly forwards.

Flashbacks of Soviet wartime flashed in my mind. The second world war, at its peak... the thunderous boom... but not gunfire. Men... soldiers, charging forwards, their boots storming across the ground...

A lone bullet drilled a hole into my shoulder, bringing me out of my flashback. Blood spilled from the wound as I looked to the plausible suspect. A unicorn armed with a sniper rifle taking residence on a shoddily made lookout tower.

Firing from the hip, I chewed apart the sniper's nest and the culprit, getting a rather iconic scream for a reward as the unicorn fell from his perch...

The Mosin sniper rifle, Trillium, rested in my hands as I peered through the rather basic and rudimentary scope. A glinting in the distance brought a smile to my face as I quickly dialed in the shot and squeezed the trigger.

A brilliant flash erupted from the end of the barrel as a bullet spat out at sonic speeds. In mere moments, far off in the distance the same bullet collided with an elite German sniper-

A bullet collided with the chest plate of my combat vest, painfully dragging me out of my memory. Not too far ahead nested two ponies operating an original style M60 machinegun, one firing the weapon while the other fed the belt of ammunition to the gun.

Bullets zoomed past me, tracers missing my face and body on both sides by mere inches. My body moved with grace, running while at the same time reloading my odd rifle. Twisting the rifle ninety degrees, I used my left hand to charge the bolt before taking it into both hands and ripping off rapid bursts of jacketed ammunition.

One lucky burst caught the operator, making the loader hesitate just long enough for me to take an aimed shot for his head...

The MG42 spat out death incarnate, green streaks of tracer rounds blazing past and cutting down my fellow comrades. Charging forwards like a mad man straight out of hell, I rushed the machinegun nest.

AVT-40 in hand, I began to chug out my own variation of death. The gun bucked wildly in my hands, shaking in a near uncontrollable state as the gun began to smoke from the stressful overheating of the barrel.

A stray shot clipped the operator in the shoulder, making him fall back with a scream. Lunging forwards, I emptied the rest of the magazine into the loader, whom nearly frozen in shock and fear-

A vicious explosion hammered the ground just a mere few feet in front of me, the shock-wave blasting me back while a piece of lone shrapnel lodged into my forehead. It remained stuck between my unpenetrable skull and soft skin while my healing factor kicked in and sealed the skin around the base of the slag. Vision dazed, I looked to the side of me where my AN-94 lay smoldering, busted apart. I grunted painfully, smoke pluming off my chest.

Getting up, I looked to an RPG totting earth pony whom seemed shocked to see me getting back up, dirt and grit falling from my body. I rushed forward like a rabid animal as he tried feverishly to load another rocket...

The Tiger tank propelled a canon round that slammed against the tank just a few feet behind me. The explosion was enough to take me off my feet and hurtle me forwards. I lay face down in the ground, fighting still going on all around me.

Looking up from the ground, blood oozed down my face, between my eyes, as I looked to the Tiger tank, an exposed gunner operating the turret machinegun. With a fierce growl, I pounced forwards, starting my run almost like a ferocious wolf, foaming at the mouth and on all fours.

The gunner targeted me as I rushed forwards, bullets spitting up debris all around me. Taking a final lunge, time seemed to slow. The gunner able to do nothing but watch in horror as I leapt with supernatural prowess, leaving his gun's field of fire and landing withing inches of him. Lunging like a predator on his prey, I bite down on his neck-

Blood spewed into my face as I cut apart the rocket launcher totting pony. My claws, now unsheathed from between my knuckles and encased with Shadow Steel, were coated in the dead stallion's blood, along with the rest of my body.

I snarled viciously, the gunfire stopping for a moment as the others all looked in terror to the horror scene before them before quickly unloading their rifles into me. In a blaze of eruption my battle jacket was shredded apart in mere moments, my body turned into bloody Swiss-cheese.

They all stopped for a moment as smoke from their rifles obscured their vision. Slowly, and most terrifyingly, I stepped forth from the blustering smoke, their mouths all gaping in shock. My nose scrunched back as I bared my teeth in a vicious display before lurching forwards...

My sickly knife jammed into the Nazi officer's neck several times, blood splattering into my face as I finished him off. Standing up from the carnage, I looked around to the scene... the display, I had made... I nearly staggered as I tried to grasp all that was happening.

A hand grenade landed at my feet-

The explosion lifted me off my feet and hurtled me several yards away. Slowly trying to grasp my bearings, I looked up as a dozen stallions slowly trotted over with weapons drawn on me. This was gonna hurt.

I clenched my eyes shut and jolted as automatic fire erupted. Even so, I barely felt a thing. A low cycle chugging began as the group was quickly chopped into mincemeat. Tracers zoomed across the battlefield from a heavy machinegun...

Juggernaut roared into the scene, driving in reverse with the back hatch door open. From its confines emerged a gun so iconic it was still in military service back on my world despite it's age.

My vision zeroed in on the barrel where the engraved inscription read 'Ma Deuce'. The gun jerked and rattled despite its tripod mount, yet never the less rained down hell on its opponents...

Myself, along with thousands of others, ran forth towards the Reichstag building, firing wildly at any foolish enough to still oppose us. Squads of dug in Nazi stragglers tried to fight back but were nearly swamped by the onslaught of Soviet troops...

Juggernaut came to a screeching halt as Kianna emptied the rest of the gun's ammunition into the skies, chopping down the pegasi that were still circling and trying to take pot shots on me. They quickly diverted and headed back towards the nearby city of Manehatten.

The barrel of Ma Deuce smoked as Kianna disembarked from the titan truck. “I still would've liked to have taken the car instead,” she remarked as we looked to the crimson all around us. “Think they're all dead?” she asked and I shrugged.

“There's still more,” I reminded her, to which she laughed.

“So what now? We hit them where they live?” she asked and I nodded.

“Chop the head off the snake,” I replied. Truthfully, I didn't like the idea of whacking my old friend, Mr. Leone... but if whacking him meant stopping a possible uprising that would lead to the downfall of Equestria as I knew it...

“What about my plane?” she asked curiously. We both looked to her aircraft, still filled nearly to the brim with crates of various firearms.

“Get what we need. Burn the rest. They'll be of no use to us after this,” I told her.

“Nobody is gonna wreck my plane...” she said sternly but trailed off as I looked to her, the woman closing her eyes with a small tear droplet falling to the ground. “That was always my thing... you don't fuck with me... or my plane... or I kill you. But I guess all of that doesn't mean much now, huh?” she asked. I put my hand on her shoulder.

“The past... needs to be put to rest,” I told her and she nodded.

“Y-yeah... come on, let's do this,” she said regretfully. Stepping up into the cargo bay, we began to stockpile explosives in certain areas of the plane to ensure complete and utter destruction.

Before either of us could react, Kianna was struck hard by a pony whom tackled her to the ground. I grasped the moment at hand and ran into him full tilt, battering him to the ground but the stallion moved with grace and flipped my body off his with a few simple movements.

Both of us stood up and I went for my handcannon that was holstered on my thigh but quickly realized the strap had come loose and the gun had fallen from its place when the stallion had kicked me off from atop of him.

The stallion unsheathed a seven inch combat knife and weaved it about with what appeared to be a professional fighting style. “Alright... two can play this game...” I said as I pulled out the Bowie knife from my sheath.

The stallion edged around me, quarreling me and prodding my defensive stature. Taking a few quick and somewhat lazy swings, he tried to get a feel for my combat style. Moving with a brisk pace, he tried to penetrate my defenses with a quick stabbing attack that I quickly sidestepped and countered with three blistering fast slashes to his side.

The stallion gasped in shock and pain as he looked to his superficial wounds. Taking his knife in an inverted grip he tried again, lunging with striking precision that I countered with my own form of defense.

We exchanged a brief fury of cuts and stabs before stepping back, both of us having received numerous wounds. I leaked profusely, my healing factor having still not kicked in from my previous battle and the gunshot wounds still oozing blood like a leaking faucet. The shrapnel lodged between my skin and skull oozed a constant stream of blood that nearly blinded my vision.

Deciding to take to the offensive and brush off, I rushed him full on but was surprised when he ducked my slash and jabbed me full on in the gut. I gasped as the wind was taken out of me. It was like he had full on punched me in the solar plexus.

I grunted as he flipped me onto my back and began lashing out with a barrage of stabs to my chest. Goddess I was rusty at fighting. Shows what time will do to you...

I tried to fight back but ended up with more stab wounds. Going to finish me, he went to stab down on my neck. Lunging my hands up, his blade drove through both my hands and locked between my Shadow Steel encased bones.

Despite my usual strength, I was offset by my winded state, still having troubles breathing along with the fact he had perforated my lungs with his knife.

I grunted in effort but couldn't muster the power to best him...

Suddenly there was a tremendous roar and my mind just faded out. I could see everything happening but couldn't so much as blink.

My oldest friend and ally battered the stallion from the side, plowing him into a crate of weapons. Bashing him several times in the rib cage, my friend got off some very impressive hits before the stallion struck back, slamming my friend back into a crate of weapons opposite them.

Charging forwards, the stallion was suddenly kicked back as my friend performed a roundhouse kick that connected with the stallion's lower jaw. The fighter staggered, giving my friend just enough time to let out one final roar of... it sounded like agony...

Claws, identical to my own, emerged from between his knuckles. Evan soon became coated in a purely white, mystic aura that surrounded his entire body with a fiery glow. The stallion staggered back and looked in terrified awe at the sight just as my friend leapt forwards, impaling the stallion with his claws and driving them into his foe dozens of times.

Heaving him up into the air, Evan let the stallion become impaled one final time before the man shredded his claws outwards from each other, slicing the stallion in half.

I blinked in awe as I stood up. Staggering over to him there was a sudden thunderous boom that made us both jolt. A blue hue flashed the entire interior of the plane, entering from the opened cargo hatch at the rear along with some of the windows.

It was pouring rain outside... a thunderstorm had brewed... possibly the work of the pegasi that deserted. “Is this what we've become?” Evan asked quietly. “Demons?”

“What?” I asked back in curiosity. Evan slowly walked over to a window, leaking blood all across the floor.

Kianna grunted as she hoisted herself up, leaning painfully against a large ammo crate. “What's he going on about?” she asked, myself shrugging.

Pressing his hand up against the interior hull of the plane, he looked out the window. “Hey... whatcha lookin' at?” I asked, curious as to his thoughts which, for some reason, I couldn't sense beforehand like I usually did.

He looked out the window as blood, both his and the stallion's, dripped from his body. A flash of lightning struck again in the distance, coating the entire interior of the plane blue and that's when I noticed his reflection in the window.

The slag stuck in his head like a demonic horn... the gunshots riddled throughout his body... the blood, both his and others', coated over his entire body. His answer sent shivers down my spine. “Us...”

* * *

“Are we really going to do this?” Evan asked aloud, somehow no longer held back by the mental restraints I had tried to put on him.

There was another flash of nearby lightning that boomed and crackled immensely. I swallowed hard as Kianna looked to me, both of us soaked to the bone. “You think about pulling that piece of slag out of your skull yet?” she asked.

“He won't let me...” I remarked, much to her amusement.

“Oh, you mean your significant other?” she laughed. I nodded as I went to pull out the metal but was instead greeted by flashing lights and a sharp pain that made my arm stiffen and move away. At least my other wounds had healed properly, along with the excess blood being washed away by the torrential downpour.

I now dawned my black duster coat, since most of my clothing had been destroyed in the fighting as well. Underneath the coat was my holy cross Punisher shirt, just like old times...

“Leave it in... we deserve it...” Evan muttered as my body moved without my input, hand charging the bolt on my AKM, the AN-94 having been completely destroyed in the fight for the plane.

“So what's the plan?” Kianna asked in a somewhat calm voice. “Go in guns blazing?” she asked in a bemused voice.

“I was thinking more... nonchalantly,” I replied as I stood up. “Stay here... I'll be back,” I told her in a perfect one liner voice.

“Wait... so what's the plan?” she asked, myself shrugging.

“I dunno yet,” I answered honestly, leaving Kianna hiding in the alleyway as I strode towards the lane way that was blocked by a gate and two guards armed with assault rifles.

“Gosh they got those out fast...” I muttered as I walked towards the gate.

“The pegasus were probably moving them from the plane to here. The others were just standing guard,” Evan noted, myself nodding in agreement. “Think they know yet?” he asked but I shook my head as I approached them.

'No... or they would've shot me already,' I stated quietly.

“Mr. B?” One of the guards asked in confusion.

“Colts. Fine night for it,” I greeted them.

“Hey... whatchu doin' here? I thought you lived a day's drive away,” one of the guards noted.

“I do...” I trailed off as time seemed to slow. 'What am I going to say?' I asked myself then thought up a lie right quick. “I need to talk to Mr. Leone, it's real important.”

One of the guards moved to the intercom system while the other nodded and spoke directly to me. “I'd say so, some pegasus came flying back with their tails between their legs and were saying you attacked them. Of course Mr. Leone couldn't believe it so he sent some guys to go see if you were home... but I suppose if you're here already then that means-” he was cut short by the second stallion.

“Mr. Leone said to come see him right away. Sounded important. Real important,” the other stallion mentioned as the metal gate slid to the side and allowed me passage. I quickly headed up the paved lane way, passing several luxurious mobster homes on my way to the Don's.

A lot of stallion's were looking at me with death stares and I could imagine why. Had those pegasus blabbed their mouths like they undoubtedly did, then a lot of these goons probably believed me to have done it.

Stepping up onto the porch of Antonio Leone's mansion, the guard at the door stepped forwards. “Sorry Mr. B. You'll have to turn over your guns. The Don's really stressed with everything that's been happening,” he said, myself raising a brow.

“Why? What happened?” I asked, the guard giving me a strange look as I unslung my AK and handed it over, keeping my Desert Eagle hidden beneath my long black duster coat.

“You don't know? Isn't that why you're here?” he asked.

“I came because some crazy lady-” the guard cut me short.

“I don't want to hear it. I don't think you'd ever betray us, Mr. B. But you best go talk to Mr. Leone before explaining yourself to me,” he told me and with that I entered the home. It was just as snazzy as the last time I had been here.

Walking around, I led myself into the living room where Mr. Leone was waiting with some armed guards.

“Fuck... shit I didn't want to believe it but there's no way in all fucking Tartarus you could've made it here in just two hours,” he swore, the hard ponies raising their weapons on me.

“WOAH! Jesus sweet fucking goddess, what the fuck?!” I yelled.

“What the fuck yourself! Why are you here?” he asked violently.

“I'm here because some crazy bitch came to my house ranting that you guys killed her stallion or some shit and that she wanted to wipe you all out,” I partially lied, Mr. Leone leaning back in his office chair, deep in thought.

“So why didn't you just call me?” he asked interrogatively.

“Phone line's down. This is the same storm that swept through Ponyville just the other day. Must've knocked a tree down on the telephone line,” I lied. Mr Leone waved his hoof and one of the stallion's brought him over a phone.

“I swear to fuck if you're lying to me...” he dialed the old style phone and waited as the phone began to ring... and ring... and ring... and ring. He slammed the phone down. “No fuckin' shit... so why didn't you whack this bitch then and there?” he asked.

“I was with my family at the time. She burst into my home and had the drop on me and my folks. Didn't want to risk their lives so I convinced her I had nothing to do with... whatever the fuck she was going on about. She swore death upon all of you so I decided to get here as fast as I could to warn you but... I guess you got things under control. I mean... this is some pretty serious hardware,” I commented, Mr. Leone laughing.

“Yeah well this 'hardware' doesn't make these stallions any more competent. I'm assuming it was that crazy bitch that took out my guys at the plane,” he said and I butted in.

“Wait, what plane?” I asked but he merely waved his hoof as he stood up, the stallions still training their weapons on me. Suddenly, and without much warning, he slapped one of his body guards straight across the face.

“You goof! The fuck you still pointing that thing at him for?" he hollered in the stallion's face, the others quickly lowering their rifles as Leone turned back to me. "Sorry Burdick... err, Parker. I should've never doubted you. It's just that... well it's a long story but... ahhh, shit's just been real fucked up, you know?” He poured two glasses of liquor before walking over to me.

“I've got a really serious problem. You see, we just picked up a shipment of merchandise and somepony... something, took out my guys and the ones left said it was you. I know... everything is so crazy and fucked up right now that my own guys think you of all ponies are coming after us. Now, we still have about a quarter of the stash hidden away at my warehouse that I want to move out of town tonight. Problem is, if that bitch, or whoever it is that's taking out my guys, hits again, I want us to be prepared. Whadda yah say?” he asked, myself perking a brow.

“Are you asking me to track this mystery figure down and kill 'em or protect your warehouse?” I asked and Mr. Leone laughed heartily before turning back to his bodyguards.

“Why do I even pay you idiots when I have a guy like him around?” he asked aloud before turning back to me. “Seriously. Everypony else around here is pissing their pants, you show up and in five minutes you're offering to whack the fucker who took out a couple dozen of my guys. Goddess, I should kiss you!” he announced.

I took a sip of the liquor and swallowed it down rather harshly. He shook his head before taking a sip of his own beverage. “My boy, I really like you, truly I do. You show initiative, which is more that these foals can say,” he insulted his hench-ponies further.

“What I need you to do is head over to my warehouse. Take Sunshine and Buttercup, they'll show you the way. Get down there and make sure this thing goes through. When that's done come back here and uhh... we'll discuss this... this bitch that needs to be iced.” I nodded and two of the body guards stepped forwards. I took one last sip of my drink before setting the glass back on his table, giving him a nod which he returned.

Stepping back outside, my rifle was returned and the three of us headed out. “Mr. B, wanna take our motorized carriage?” they asked, motioning to the contraption that looked like a Ford Model T or something along those lines.

“Uhhh... you know... thanks and all, but I'd rather drive my battle truck. It's faster and I parked it just around the corner,” I informed them, having a different plan in mind. As we walked across the street on our way to Juggernaut, one of the hard ponies informed me of the location; a warehouse in close proximity to the city docks. The three of us headed towards the alleyway from whence I came, slipping out of view from the others at the estate.

No sooner were we out of view, did Kianna jump out and tackle one of the goons to the ground, myself swinging around, claws emerging from my knuckles, and stabbing the second stallion right through the throat.

He gasped in shock and horror, baffled mostly in disbelief as his life slipped away and he collapsed beside his lifeless friend. Kianna stood up, patting herself off as she looked to me. “So what next?” she asked.

I went to rub my forehead but flinched as I accidentally brushed my hand against that piece of metal slag. 'When this is done... I'm pulling that thing out...'

* * *

Third person...

“I don't care what Mr. Leone said! I want these crates loaded right away!” Yelled a demanding stallion as he overlooked the warehouse operations.

With a huff, he pulled out a cigarette before trotting over to a nearby alleyway corner to take a leak. Lifting his rear leg like a dog, he was suddenly taken off guard as a hand wrapped around his mouth, cigarette falling to the ground, a knife driving fatally into his neck as he was dragged into the darkness without so much as a peep...

Two sentries trotted casually along, weapons tucked at their sides. “This is retarded. Old stallion Leone is loosing his marbles. First he thinks it's Mr. B, now he's got him coming to defend us against some crazy twat we jacked these guns off of... I tell you, I ain't afraid of nothing. That bitch so much as-” he was cut short as an arrow silently lodged right through his skull, part of the arrow protruding from his eye socket yet his body kept staggering about lifelessly.

The other stallion kept trotting forwards but stopped somewhat abruptly as he waited for his friend to finish his statement. “What's wrong, bitch got your-” the stallion began as he spoke while turning but gasped as he saw the horror before him.

Even so, sooner than he could even blink, a figure emerged from the shadows and grabbed him from behind, hand around the mouth, a knife driving into his neck and pulling him back into the darkness along with the already dead arrow victim...

One of the laborers heaved up a crate and loaded it into the wagon before going for another. Stopping as he noticed a different kind of box, he pointed it out to one of his fellow associates. “What's up with that one?” he asked, the other looking over and shrugging.

“What do you mean? It's another fuckin' box. We gotta load 'em all,” he mentioned, the first stallion rolling his eyes.

“I know that, idiot. What I mean is, why the hell does it look different?” he asked, the second just shrugging.

“They all look different, feel different, hell half of these fucking crates don't even have the same stuff in 'em. Just load it already for fuck sakes,” he scolded the first. With a silent curse towards the other, the first stallion trotted mindlessly over to the cardboard box.

Going to heave it up, the box suddenly jumped up and encased him, bumping and bouncing several times before going completely still. After several moments, the box slowly slid off into the shadows...

One by one, stallions started disappearing from the workforce. One final stallion remained whom walked along, looking directly at his clipboard, not a care in the world about his surrounding. “You colts better hurry up. Mr. Leone wants this shipment out yester-” he was cut off as a big burly man grabbed him from behind and put him in a headlock. The stallion's clipboard fell to the ground as he attempted to break free.

The stallion squirmed and struggled as he tried to pull the man's arms from his neck. “Where the hell were these going?” Derreck demanded.

“The... safe houses... all around... the city...” the stallion gasped, Derreck giving him a bit of extra breathing room.

“Why?” he interrogated.

“Aw come on... I told you all I know... I'm just the driver,” he pleaded, Derreck instead pulling out his knife and bringing it to the stallion's throat.

“I think you know a bit more than that,” he replied, the stallion's eyes going wide with fear.

“Alright! ALRIGHT!” He kicked a bit as he wheezed for air. “We were planning a coup... raise a militia to overthrow Equestria... no longer will we... just operate from the shadows... we'll be the-” Derreck cut him off by snapping his neck.

“That's all I needed to know,” he answered back before looking to Kianna. “Guess these are all the guns, eh?” he asked, Kianna nodding.

“Looks like it... I mean, aside from the ones they armed their thugs with. What now?” she asked, the man perking a brow as he looked to the docks that the Liotta family now owned, or rather, used as a front...

* * *

Stallions mingled along the docks, some standing guard while others patrolled the surrounding area. Off near the entrance to the docks, shone a pair of headlights, followed by the rev of a magical engine.

“What the hell is that?” asked one of the stallions posted on guard duty as he squinted his eyes. The headlights suddenly started racing towards them, a flaming wagon in tow just behind the vehicle.

“Holy shit!” the stallion yelled as he raised his rifle and began popping off rounds towards the oncoming threat. Others quickly joined in, pelting the driver and riddling his corpse, yet the vehicle still continued forwards.

One of the mob ponies rushed out with a light machinegun, quickly setting up the bi-pod and blazing off a hail of lead towards the incoming vehicle and wagon. “Holy shit! Nothing will stop this guy!” yelled one of the stallions as he leapt out of the way.

In his last few moments of life, he looked to the driver, whom he recognized as the usual delivery stallion. 'But he's supposed to be at the warehouse...' his final thoughts went through his mind just as the vehicle and wagon collided with the dock crane, the blazing wagon erupting and going up in a tremendous fireball with a shock wave so powerful it shook the ground.

The fireball rose up into the sky, illuminating the city sky for a short time and gaining the attention of many residents in distant homes, some of which were over a mile away...

* * *

Derreck's perspective...

Rain continued to piss down, soaking my hair and neck but thankfully I still had my trusty old duster coat which, thanks to the oilskin exterior, kept me dry for the most part. “So this is where it ends...” Kianna muttered beside me.

“Yeah,” I replied, but she just chuckled.

“No... uhh, sorry. I was talking to Dwayne,” she commented, myself perking a brow.

“Didn't take you for a religious woman,” I remarked. She shook her head as she wiped her hair back.

“I'm not... it's just... kinda a nice thought to think maybe... maybe he's listening,” she informed me before cocking her rifle.

“Ready?” I asked and she nodded.

“I was born ready,” she quipped. Damn... she took my line. I flipped off the safety on my rifle and we both charged forwards recklessly, chewing apart the guards at the gate without much warning.

The gunshots quickly gained the attention of the others inside the estate and within seconds, all hell had broken loose. Bullets whizzed through the air in all directions, most of the mobsters not having an idea of where we were at the moment.

Kianna triggered her M203 launcher and blew apart the metal sliding gate, allowing us entrance as we blew into the luxurious estate, chewing down several ponies before we even stepped foot on the lane way.

The AKM bucked and kicked in my arms, hammering away at my shoulder as I took aimed bursts at our enemies... once my comrades and friends. Kianna moved with utter grace, running and gunning with utmost precision.

She launched another grenade round that struck the side of a building, exposing the interior as she rattled off another trio of shots. A group of heavily armed goons rushed down the lane way at us, guns blazing and illuminating the dark night with bright muzzle flashes.

I knelt down and held back on the trigger of my AKM, the bolt clattering back and forth as the gun ran in full-auto, empty casings being spat out just as fast as bullets left the barrel. The group was quickly cut down as I ran my sights in a straight horizontal motion, chewing them apart with jacketed bullets.

Slapping away the empty magazine, I fitted the gun with a fresh one and continued my assault alongside my only ally. Making a slow and bloody ascent to Mr. Leone's home, Kianna again thumped off a grenade round that blew apart his front door.

“I'll lead!” I told her.

“I want to kill that prick myself!” she yelled over the booming thunder of the storm and erupting gunshots. I let her lead the way into the mansion, chewing apart several goons as we entered. Up high on the second floor interior balcony of the home stood three stallions whom tried to quickly cut us down.

Firing from the hip, I let the gun guide itself, watching as wood splintered apart and bullets chewed up the hard-ponies.

From around a corner sprang a pegasus with a shotgun, thumping Kianna in the chest. “FUCK!” I yelled as I quickly swung my sights to him and blew him away, dumping my entire magazine into the punk.

Kianna coughed and gagged as I rushed to her aid. Patting her down, I sighed in relief as I remembered she had worn a ballistic vest as I had previously. “I think... I broke a few ribs...” she grunted painfully just as I heard the screeching of tires outside.

Hoisting her up we both watched through the blown out entrance as three old style vehicles took off, the middle carriage carrying Mr. Leone. Kianna and I both rose our rifles with one hand, our other wrapped around each other to keep her sturdy, and unloaded our magazines at the motor carriages.

“FUCK! He's getting away!” Kianna yelled as we rushed outside. Slinging the AKM across my back and sticking my thumb and middle into my mouth, I let out a loud whistle.

The Eagle Eye on my face indicated Juggernaut was on her way. Blowing right through the brick wall surrounding the estate, the battle truck skidded to a stop just in front of us. I helped Kianna into the passenger side before taking my own spot in the driver's seat.

“They went... gah! They went that way!” Kianna groaned over her pained ribs. I pinned the accelerator to the floor and took off after them, the truck's turbo quickly spooling as we hit a high RPM zone.

Quickly catching up with the group, the tailing car's occupants opened fire with their weapons, bullets pinging off the vehicle's heavy plated armor. Rolling down her window, Kianna called out a swear and lit into the vehicle with her M16 rifle.

The group of vehicles took a turn down another street which we quickly followed, only to be greeted by more bullets from the tailing car. Kianna was out her window again, cursing at them as she unloaded her weapon wildly.

One of her stray rounds clipped the driver in the head, the vehicle quickly careening off course and smashing violently into a brick wall, erupting into a plume of flame as it did so. “YEAH! FUCK YOU CUNTS! GAHHH FUCK!” she swore wildly, her busted ribs obviously giving her more grievance than she expected.

No sooner had she swore, did a wild bullet clip her in the shoulder. She let out a scream of pain as blood gushed out. Loosing her balance and nearly falling out the window, her grip on the M16 deteriorated and the weapon slipped from her hand, clattering in the street as we chased after the remaining two cars, the lead car falling back and coming in behind Leone's car to give him cover.

Grabbing Kianna by the belt, I dragged her back into the truck. “Take the wheel,” I ordered, Kianna hesitating for a moment. “You still got one good arm, steer!” I ordered as I popped open the driver door and leaned out, supporting myself on the door as I unholstered Evan's legendary handcannon and took aim.

Bullets from the defending vehicle whizzed by my in all different directions, never really getting close to their mark.

These goons were foolish, untrained... spraying and praying while also in a car chase... emptying their guns in wild fashion, not taking the time to aim. It wouldn't make much of a difference in reality, with Juggernaut being armored and all, but irregardless almost three quarters of their shots completely missed the truck.

Holding the door with my left and the cannon with my right, I took my time, ignoring the bullets that were spraying all over the street... ignoring the small distractions on the side... the pouring rain... the thunder of the storm...

My eyes squinted as I looked to my prize and led it... gently squeezing back on the trigger and finding her sweet spot... Belladonna tight in my hand...

She went off like a crack of thunder, so much so it nearly deafened me. The heavy slug chewed into the center bore of the tire's rim, blowing apart the locking lugs and wheel hub. The tire quickly wobbled before simply shattering apart, the vehicle careening off the road wildly and striking a building wall which jacked it up off the ground and rolled the vehicle.

Before I could take another shot, Leone's car erratically swerved off to the side and drifted around a corner. “FUCK!” I yelled as I got back in to slam the brakes. Kianna stopped me as she held the wheel to keep the truck straight.

“No-no! It's alright, that street only goes one way, take the next left and we might be able to T-bone him,” she informed me. With that I slammed the door while still driving, cranking the next left just like Kianna said.

Stomping on the accelerator, I gritted my teeth, hoping we didn't miss him. My hands gripped tight on the steering wheel as we headed full speed ahead. The engine roared out a mighty tune as the vehicle shook under the power of the motor.

My brows furrowed as blood dripped down my face. From the side street came Leone's car, like a bat out of hell. Time seemed to slow for just a fraction of a second as I saw his face, baffled beyond belief that we had caught up to him.

Time returned to normal as I plowed into his motor carriage, the impact jolting my truck slightly but sending his flipping over and skidding on it's side down the street. Bringing the vehicle to a stop, I slammed the truck into park while both Kianna and I stepped out, myself dawning the massive handcannon known as Belladonna while Kianna dawned her own S&W 629 Performance Center.

Walking up to the vehicle, I heard cursing and swearing from the other side. “Pricks! PRICKS! Look what you've done... FUCK YOU!” Leone swore as we circled around the vehicle, only to see the bloodied stallion slowly crawling out from his toppled carriage.

“Derreck! I trusted you! And... and you fuckin' betrayed me you snake!” he yelled, his words hitting me pretty hard. Before either of us could speak, Kianna cut in.

“You betrayed us first you cunt. Double crossing me on that deal!” Kianna yelled back. I took a moment to think how surprising it was that no police had shown up yet. First time I arrived in Manehatten I shot that thug and the police swarmed me like bugs...

Walking over, Kianna put her heel to his shoulder and rolled him onto his back. “This is for what you did to Dwayne you piece of shit!” she scowled scornfully.

“Derreck! Derreck... I made you...” he groaned, both Kianna and myself looking to one another before leveling our guns on the downed, and the city's final, mob boss.

“Say goodnight, Mr. Leone!” Kianna hissed before we both unloaded our respective handguns into the stallion...

* * *

'Police are still trying to piece together the events of last night's vicious attack that struck several locations of the city...'

The afternoon sun was still rather high yet gave off a late afternoon haze. The warmth of the sun beating through the window had my eyes half lidded as I looked out to the empty expanse of desert...

'Eruptions that some can only describe as thunder echoed across the city as groups of ponies fought against one another with futuristic weaponry. How the ponies came into possession of these exotic weapons is still being investigated...'

Juggernaut putted along at a gentle pace through the desert plains. The warm sun, made even warmer and cozier by the amplification of heat through the windshield, put me in a lax state. My lips were slightly parted as I let out a soft exhale, watching the odd cactus as we drove past it, the odd vulture in the sky...

'Police are still finding the bodies of ponies, with the death count now well over fifty, it has been recorded as one of this year's most bizarre, and deadly, cases yet...'

Leaning my elbow on the windowsill and my cheek in the palm of my hand, I steered with my right while looking to Kianna. Spotting a second handgun holstered in a shoulder rig. Taking a closer look, I noticed it was the same one Dwayne had when I...

“You kept his gun?” I asked in a soft tone, Kianna looking to me...

'Residents in the area are still coming to terms with the emotional aftermath of what some consider a full blown street war that ended as quickly as it had came...'

“Why not?” she asked me, myself shrugging.

“I dunno. I was just... asking, you know?” I replied, Kianna sighing. Silence, save for the lone tune of Juggernaut's engine, encased us as we drove through the empty expanse. Finally, after some length of time, Kianna spoke.

“So what now?”

'The sound of explosions shook nearby homes by the docks and in the inner city in a way that some believed it were an earthquake...'

“Well... I guess... I'll give you some money and you can disappear. And I'm gonna... fall off the grid... go golfing... spend time with my family...”

'One resident had this to say to police: Yeah, it was pretty wild, but I'll tell you something. It was just like last year. Wild explosions, thundering banging and that crane at the dock exploding and getting knocked over again. I hope it happens every year, wayyyyy better than the fourth of July...'

My truck slowly pulled up at the fueling warehouse. Slipping the truck into park, I looked to Kianna. “I'm sorry,” I apologized, the woman looking to me in a confused way.

“For what?” she asked and I sighed.

“For everything... for this... for Dwayne,” I answered, Kianna sighing as she rubbed her forehead.

“It wasn't your fault,” she replied back.

“I know... I'm just... I guess... my condolences,” I told her, a small tear trickling down her cheek. I twitched suddenly as the slag, which was still lodged in my forehead, caused me slight pain.

“You aughta see about getting that pulled out,” she joked as she got out. Walking around to my side, she popped open the fuel cap and shoved the diesel nozzle into the hole. “Fill it?” she asked and I nodded.

Jamming the cap in the nozzle handle to keep it on, she came back over to the door. “I'm just gonna go get a few things from inside. With all the commotion when I got back I didn't get to... ahem... yeah...”

I nodded to her as she walked towards the warehouse. As she walked away, I looked up to a dead security camera, taking note this is the exact spot I had parked when I clapped Dwayne... I hadn't parked her on purpose, nor did I notice until now...

* * *

Third person...

Kianna slowly walked inside, her body exhausted, sore, aching...

Slowly walking aimlessly around the warehouse, she reminisced on old times with her squad... Senka... Brick... Lug...

“Dwayne...” she whispered, another tear dripping from her eyes. As she walked around, recurring visions of them continued to play in her mind. Walking over to a filing cabinet, she began rummaging through it. Sorting through files, she tossed them aside. Most of it was Dwayne's things.

Finding what she was after, she held the small box in her palm. For a long moment she just looked at it, almost unable to find the strength to open it. Finally, and rather slowly, she flipped open the top to the little box and was nearly knocked to the ground by her overflowing emotions. The engagement ring Dwayne had given her. Tears dripped down Kianna's face as she wept, cursing herself for ever agreeing to the deal with the Liottas.

Slowly sliding down the wall, she took a seat and dipped her forehead into her palms, softly sobbing to herself on the marriage that could've been... what a wonderful life they could have had...

Tilting her head back against the wall, she looked to the ceiling, tears dribbling down her cheeks. She could hear all their voices. All her comrades, but most especially, she could hear Dwayne. His coltish laugh...

Figuring she should come to terms with herself sooner rather than later, she went to stand up then noticed something rather particular.

Under a desk at the far end of the room lay a laptop. Struggling to her feet, she slowly walked over and retrieved the device, hitting the power button but finding the battery dead. “Son of a...” she trailed off with a sigh before looking around and spotting a charging cable nearby.

Retrieving the cable she plugging in the laptop and tried to turn it on but to no avail. “Power's out...” she muttered, looking to the breaker box and walking over. A few, but not all, of the breakers had been tripped. "Guess that's why the pumps still work..." she mused to herself.

Flipping the breakers and reactivating the power, she headed back over to the laptop. Quickly booting up the device and bypassing all the passwords, she found herself on the main page. 'Just... even if it is his last moments... just to see him one last time...' she thought to herself.

Flicking through the gallery, there was a little notation that indicated the security cameras had booted up along with the laptop. Going through the gallery, she shed more tears as she looked over several images stored on the device's memory of her and Dwayne. Finding the security recordings, she hit the replay button and watched the events unfold before her, as though she was looking back in time.

For a long while nothing happened. Hitting the fast forward button several times, she sighed in wonder if the camera had even caught it. Then, to her shock, she watched as a truck pulled in.

Her stomach twisted as her heart skipped a beat. Derreck got out and began to speak on the outside phone, to whom she wasn't sure. After a brief few moments he hung up then drew his handgun. Shortly there after, the video feed cut out...

Kianna staggered back, unable to believe what she had just saw. But she had seen it nonetheless. Her engagement ring dropped out of her hand as they shook. She blinked and just stood their in disbelief. Her heart wrenched in her chest but she knew what needed to be done. It had all been a rouse. Slowly walking back out the door, she looked to the man sitting in his truck, so calm and peaceful.

Slowly walking over, she kept a straight face as she walked up to the driver door. “There's a vending machine in the back... want anything?” she asked, the man shaking his head.

“Anything at all, you can tell me... I'm not one to judge on your choice,” she spoke, her words having double meaning. Again the man shook his head.

“No... but I think the tank is full,” he replied, the woman chuckling as she fished through her pockets for some bits but purposefully dropped them, letting them roll under the truck.

“Fuck...” she swore as she crawled under the vehicle. Pretending to bonk her head, she took her combat knife and drove a hole in the tank. “SHIT! Maybe think about lifting this truck, you redneck,” she laughed in a seemingly playful demeanor.

Grabbing her coins as diesel poured out of the tank, she stood back up and looked to Derreck. “Last chance to tell me,” she said, her words again having two possible meanings, of which he didn't catch on.

“No. Really, I'm good,” he said, Kianna smiling as she turned around.

“Suit yourself...” she said, beginning to walk away but stopping to speak to him one final time. "You were right..." she mentioned, the man looking to her. "The past... needs to be put to rest." With that she walked away as her faked smile turned into a hateful, twisted, frown. Walking over to the side of the warehouse, Kianna looked back to the truck...

Derreck sat in Juggernaut, enjoying the warmth of the sun. With a sigh, he slowly opened his eyes. Catching a glance of a little blinking light, he took notice that the security cameras were now active again.

He thought for a brief moment before his heart stopped, stomach twisted, and the hair on the back of his neck rose up. Knowing full well what it meant, but not having much time for anything, the man leaned back in his seat, closing his eyes once more...

Kianna drew out Dwayne's pistol, it's engravings shining brightly. The woman looked to the truck, it's diesel splashing to the ground as it leaked profusely while she took aim and quickly squeezed the trigger. The bullet sparked off the ground, quickly igniting the leaking diesel. At first, the flames merely spread across the ground but within a heartbeat the flames traveled up to the underbelly of the truck and it erupted into a mass fireball that shot sky high, though the vehicle itself barely moved.

Kianna swallowed hard as she watched the truck burn, just like the burning hatred she had inside for the man whom had killed her fiancé...

* * *

Kianna looked hatefully upon the estate that once belonged to Derreck. Walking up to the front door, she rang the bell but got no answer. Ringing again but still getting no answer, she opted to simply boot down the door, entering with her gun drawn.

She would take the lives of his family, as he had done her, even if he wasn't alive to mourn like she would be. Quickly scanning the area, she found the immediate area empty. “Hello?!” she yelled out but got no answer. Sneakily creeping through the mansion, she eventually found her way to the kitchen where a large note was left on the fridge.

Kianna snatched it up and took a look.

'Dearly beloved whom has a sexy bod (Tee-hee, it's Lassie writing this by the way),

You were taking too long and I was getting super horny so we decided to go golfing. (Yeah I know right. How does horny and golfing mix? But I can think of more than one use for those poles)...'

Kianna stopped for a moment as she contemplated whether or not to keep reading. “Goddess... what a messed up dog...” Kianna looked to the letter and kept reading.

'...So we all opted to go to the golf course and go golfing for the afternoon while we wait. Hee-hee, we even convinced Dash and Scootaloo to come with us so I guess that means you'll 'cum' too, ha-ha...'

Kianna stopped again as she wondered to herself. “Goddess... this pooch is seriously fucked in the head...” she muttered before, almost reluctantly, continuing to read.

'So we'll all be at the golf course waiting for you when you get back,

Your super horny, drop dead sexy dog,

Lassie...'

Underneath was a set of lipstick marks, all different colors. One set was dark blue, another a lighter blue, the third a green color, and the last a cherry red with an arrow indicating to look to the back.

Flipping it over, there was another small message that Kianna read aloud. “P.S. The red lipstick was mine and Alfred wouldn't kiss the letter because he thought it would be inappropriate. I told him to relax since, you know, I kissed the letter with my other lips...”

Kianna trailed off for a second, wondering to herself. “Other lips?” she asked, before rolling the letter back over and taking a better look. That's when she finally clued in. “GAH, JESUS FUCK!” she nearly gagged as she threw the letter.

“What the fuck is wrong with this family?” she swore as her heart continued to beat rapidly. “Fuck that's gross...” she swore before finally getting her bearings together. “Okay... so the golf course huh?” she asked, slowly walking towards the exit.

Leaving the building, she walked over to the garage and looked to the covered vehicle inside. Walking over, she unsheathed the beast, tossing the cover to the side as she admired the Gran Torino, in all its glory. Walking along, she gently caressed all it's magnificent curves, the velvety smooth metal, the glossy red reflective paint...

Savoring the moment as she sat into the driver seat, she took Dwayne's pistol in her grip for a moment to look at the engravings. 'Amicitia est magicae'. With a scoff, she tossed the pistol onto the passenger seat, the opposite side of the slide facing her and revealing the second engraving...

'Friendship is magic'...

Chapter 74

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Chapter 75

'Like it was meant to be...'

Third person...

Lassie took another look out the window of the library before looking back to Twilight with a shrug. “Same thing he's been doing all day. Sitting on the tailgate of his truck looking at his handgun... heh, 'hand' gun...” she chuckled lewdly before posturing herself properly. “Say... when are you due anyway?” Lassie asked curiously, looking to Twilight's belly.

Twilight let out an exhale as she placed a few more books on the shelf. “Any day now,” she answered honestly, Lassie quickly zipping to her side.

“So what the hay are you doing working. You should be relaxing, numb-nuts. Sit down, let me get you some lemonade-” Twilight cut her short.

“Relax Lassie. I'll be fine. I just want to make sure Evan doesn't do anything foolish,” she told the dog whom just rolled her eyes.

“What, like go crazy? Equestria to Twilight, the dude is in some serious mental turmoil right now. If you're not going to go out there and talk with him, at least sit down,” Lassie ordered in a relatively passive way...

Evan sat on Cadance's tailgate, cradling the handcannon and going over its every detail. As he sat, a lone pony trotted up to the library before noticing the man. “Darling... are you... feeling alright?” the radiant mare asked worriedly. The aged man leaned his head back to look to the clear, sunny sky.

“Yeah, I'm feeling it...” he whispered under his breath, Rarity slowly walking up beside him.

“May I?” she asked, motioning to the spot beside him, the man shrugging just slightly. Hopping up beside him, she sat casually as she looked to his seemingly blank expression. “How have you been since you... well, woke up?” she asked, Evan tilting Belladonna to one side.

“He...” Evan paused for a long moment. “I, chose that name. Belladonna. Atropa Belladonna. One of the most poisonous plants on the Eastern Hemisphere... back on my world anyway,” he mentioned before turning the pistol over.

“Thy lord shall set thee free... huh...” he mused over the gun before looking to the grips. “At least I had a sense of fashion, right? Pearl white grips, flashy eh?” he asked, showing off the gun.

“Darling, are you positive you're feeling alright? You seem very... off,” Rarity asked in a concerned way. Evan nodded.

“It's just hard. Finding out your best friend was... all the things he... I, did,” Evan said softly. “I'd kinda like to be by myself... if you don't mind,” he asked politely. Rarity nodded slowly before giving him a hug which he didn't return, instead just sitting there.

“If there's anything you ever need darling, don't be afraid to ask,” she offered before hopping off the tailgate and trotting into the library.

Entering without knocking, Rarity stumbled upon Lassie and Twilight arguing rather mildly. “And I'm telling you, he's in a fragile state right now and you need to tell him exactly... oh, hey Rarity,” Lassie smiled towards the mare as the dog noticed her presence.

“Good day, Lassie. Twilight, darling, I must speak with you. It's an emergency,” she cried out in her usual, exaggerated voice. Twilight stopped for a moment to look to her friend with a smile.

“Which would be?” she asked casually.

“Well... it was going to be a complete surprise but I suppose now I'll have to ruin it since it may be ruined by bad circumstance anyway if I don't ask,” she replied.

Twilight perked a brow. “Ask what?” the lavender alicorn inquired.

“Well, I just need to know if your foal is going to be a filly or a colt is all,” she answered, Twilight chuckling with a smile.

“Actually, I don't know myself. I figured that would be the best surprise of all,” Twilight revealed, Rarity immediately starting to wail.

“NO! No this is awful! Disastrous even! I won't have nearly enough time to make another!” she cried out before stopping for a brief second to think, then began her whiny rant again. “At least not to the same magnificent standard as the original. Ohhhh no, this is just the worst possible thing ev-” Lassie cut her off with a plain voice.

“What is it?” Rarity went silent for a moment before huffing.

“Well! If you must know, I have been constructing a foal cradle for Twilight. However, I soon came to the utter realization that I had no idea whether I was going to be making a filly's cradle or a colt's. One really can't have a colt's cradle be pink, or a filly's cradle be-” she was suddenly cut off by another voice.

“I told you to make it rainbow colored, with a lightning bolt above it. That would be SO cool!” The group all looked up to the window where Dash was perched. Quickly zipping down, she grabbed a book from under her wing before handing it over to Twilight. “Here, I just stopped by to return this. But seriously, consider the rainbow color and lightning bolt,” she nodded with excitement, Rarity rolling her eyes.

“I wonder where you got that idea,” she remarked before smirking, Dash returning the smile.

“I know. I'm just full of awesome ideas right?” she replied back, totally clueless to Rarity's rhetorical comment. Lassie grinned wickedly.

“That'd be pretty pretty awesome. And there could be a storm cloud that actually rained and everything!” Lassie chimed, the others all looking to her with confused expressions.

“That's a horrible idea,” Twilight told the dog who nodded.

“I know. And you know what else is a horrible idea. Not going outside and talking with Evan,” she replied, Dash laughing off the suggestion.

“Why? He's totally fine...” she trailed off as she looked out the window and saw his seemingly depressed state. “Oh jeez, yeah, he looks terrible.” Dash ran her hoof in circles on the floor...

Evan sat lonesome by himself on the tailgate. He kept pondering his thoughts. 'She wasn't my mother?' he asked but to his utter depression, got no response in return. He dreaded the silence, the emptiness... how much he longed to hear the voice return, even to tell him something filthy and sexualized like when he was hopped up on the hospital meds.

“H-hey,” came a somewhat shy stallion's voice, Evan looking from the corner of his eye to see Twilight's siblings standing beside him. “Uhm... you know, I never really... really got to meet you. I guess I was kinda stubborn, like big brothers are, to accept my sister's... well, you know?” he stammered as he smiled brightly, offering his hoof for the man to shake.

“My name's Shining Armor, but everypony seems to just call me Shiny,” he offered kindly. When the man didn't even give him a glance, Shining spoke up. “You know... you can't really just push the world away. You should-” the man cut him short.

“What if I told you... that the Changeling invasion during your wedding never really happened. That the Changelings were all in your mind... that you were actually the cause of all the damage and in the ensuing chaos you... performed infidelity. Laid with another mare. And yet, despite all your insecurities in knowing you were unfaithful to your wife, I, somepony you barely know, came to you and said 'Don't worry dude. It's all good'. How would you react?” Evan asked calmly.

Shining blinked silently for a moment before Evan cut into his thoughts. “How would you feel if somepony told you that you were actually King Sombra. That it was all some figment of your imagination and you had been terrorizing the Crystal Empire that whole time? Would you seriously just become upbeat and happy because somepony you barely know tells you it'll be alright? Or do you just want a hoof shake?” Evan asked coldly, Shining looking down as he thought about what he had just been told.

Cadance rested her hoof on her husband's shoulder. “I'll be a minute. Why don't you go see Twilight?” she suggested, Shining looking to her. “I've got this,” she assured him with a wink before giving him a kiss. Shining trotted off as Cadance stood alone with the man.

“May I sit beside you?” she asked, the man knowing there was no point in telling her no.

“Be my guest,” he grunted, Cadance sitting down beside the man but making sure to space herself away from him, as to not make him feel further discomfort.

“I like your-” she was cut short by Evan whom didn't want anything to do with her cheery mood.

“Listen. I know what you're trying to do. And I don't want anything to do with it,” he muttered, Cadance leaning back in a seemingly shocked way.

“Well... I was just going to say your truck looks very nice. I like it. And I do vaguely remember you saying it shared the same name as me,” she tried to spark conversation.

“She... not it. And she... well, I don't even know anymore,” he stated.

“She, is very beautiful.” Cadance tried, the man sighing. “So how is it that you came to that name choice?” she asked curiously. The man didn't answer for a moment before looking to the mare. 'I don't see why not,' the man thought silently.

“Well... funny story actually. I used to race around in field cars with my friends and this guy I knew sold me a Ford Escort for sixty bits... dollars. Sixty dollars.” Evan smirked to himself as he remembered those days. “Man... most cars barely lasted a few months, that thing went for like... five years, and we beat the shi... hay, outta that car, taking it off jumps and putting it through small rivers... heh-heh...” the man smiled faintly as he recalled all the escapades he had with the car.

Cadance smiled inwardly as she noted the man's better attitude. “So... that was your first, uhm... car?” she asked, unsure of what the terminology meant but trying to further the conversation.

“Nah... It all depends on your definition of 'First car'. I had lots of beater cars before that. It's just that... well, when you have a beater car for five years, it really imprints on you. So I eventually decided to name it, since it was obviously gonna be around for a while. I don't know why, or how... but I came up with the name Candice,” he informed her as he smiled. “Her keys are in Cadance's glove box actually,” he remembered, scratching the back of his head. “Funny actually. When I bought that car, the guy that sold it to me said he'd give me a ride home. Ended up, he wanted to have a beer on the way so he let me drive his truck. On the way home he joked with me and said 'You never know. One day you might just buy this truck off me'. Of course, it was a really nice truck and he was drinking and just fooling around. Anyway, when we got home, the tow truck had brought the field car back and we started bombing around in it.”

“What happened to... err, her, Candice?” Cadance dared to guess the vehicles imaginary gender Evan had come up with.

“Same thing as every field car. Eventually broke down to the point she wasn't worth fixing. Of course, at that point I was grown up and working so I didn't really have time to go out beating around in cars so... anyway, needing to find a way back and forth to work I kinda needed a vehicle I'd be allowed to drive on the road. Something that wasn't beaten down. See back on my world we weren't allowed to drive just anything on the roads. It had to pass certifications and stuff, you know?” Evan asked, Cadance nodding a little unknowingly but deciding to go along with it.

“Anyway, so this guy I knew had this '79 Ford 150 Custom shortbox with a 351 motor in it. Standard transmission, four wheel drive, widened wheelbase... and he was decking it right out. Had a Baja suspension kit on it, off-road tires, everything! It was a slick truck. But it was missing a box and he was having trouble locating one in good shape, and then he kinda lost interest in his project and offered to sell it to me for like fifteen hundred bits, right?” he asked, Cadance lost somewhat in his explanation but gave the expression she understood everything he had said.

“So my idea was to buy it and put a flat deck on it or something. Then, like, literally just before I went to give him the money, the same guy that had sold me Candice all those years before called and... well, long story short he had bought a new truck and wanted to sell his old red truck for forty five hundred,” Evan explained as he turned to Princess Cadance with a rather plain look.

“So I figured, rather than buy a truck and put further work into it, I'd just buy a completed truck and drive it instead. So that night I was talking with my grandmother about it, and my mom... uhh, my real mom, overheard and called me a... well, an idiot, to put it lightly. Then she told my uncle and he told me I didn't need a truck and that it was a lemon and that it would be a waste of money and I should just forget about it cause it was a stupid idea... to put it lightly. They were a bit more berating then that but uhh, to keep the story short,” he told her, Cadance raising a brow.

“They berated you because you wanted to buy something?” she asked, Evan chuckling.

“Question isn't 'When did they berate me', it's 'When didn't they berate me for something?' Anyway get this,” Evan laughed. “So like three or four hours later after they talk me down from buying the truck I get a call from my friend, the one selling the truck for forty five. He asks if I seriously wanted the truck or not because my uncle and his friend just came by and tried to buy the truck off him, waving the money in his face and what not. Needless to say when Derreck found out... or I guess, I kinda got mad and was a little steamed about it so I stormed over to his house and bought the truck, then went back to my place and Der... well, me, I confronted my uncle and his friend and told them exactly what I had on my mind, and told them I bought the truck.”

Evan looked to the side of the box and rubbed the smooth red metal. “They yelled at me for that... well, they yelled at me for a few weeks, telling me that I wasted my money and that the truck was a piece of shi... piece of junk, and that it was going to break down at any moment and... well, they never stopped talking down to me about it, and even when I did my truck up all nice, they said I wasted my money and just put lipstick on a pig...” Evan trailed off as he looked over his shoulder to the cab of the truck, which now looked somewhat plain due to the headache light rack being removed along with the front grill bars.

“Anyway, it was only a month of owning the truck before I figured I should name the truck, since it was my first street legal vehicle. And since I had bought it from the same guy I bought my car from... well, it just seemed right to name it after Candice, or something close. So... you know, Candice-Cadance...” Evan smiled as he leaned back with a smile.

“It's beautiful. She, is beautiful,” Cadance commented, Evan sighing.

“You know... sometimes, when I think about it... I just... what if he hadn't called me that night? What if I had've bought the the custom truck earlier? What if I had've spent the money I had and couldn't afford Cadance? What if I had've missed the call? What if my friend sold the truck to my uncle instead? What if Der... what if I didn't get the courage to stand up to my uncle and his friend and just let them buy her instead? What if I had let them convince me she was a useless endeavor? Huh... you know, when he said I might just end up buying Cadance from him one day... I would've never thought it to be, you know? It just feels like, sometimes, I feel like... like it was meant to be. You know?” Evan asked her and she nodded, looking back towards the library and pointing.

“It's the same way with Shining and I, you know,” she commented, the man perking a brow. “He fell head over hooves for me the first time he met me and... well, he was kind of a clutz around me,” she giggled, looking towards the library and through the window to her sister-in-law and husband. “However, I couldn't think of any other stallion who was more adorable than him.” Evan, despite the already mushy content of the story, started to listen with interest.

“And his attempts to get my attention were... different to say the least,” she giggled as she recalled Shining singing rather horribly on the float during The Fall Formal Parade. “I liked it. It may have been a tad different but... well, needless to say many of the others in the school didn't see it the same way,” she mentioned, explaining in simple detail the events leading up to their relationship, the man listening with some form of interest. “I was kind of hoping he'd ask me to the dance but well...” she trailed off and the man perked a brow. When she didn't speak, Evan spoke up.

“Well... what happened? Come on, don't leave me hanging.” Evan complained, Cadance smiling to his interest in the story.

“Despite his seemingly obvious attraction to me, he didn't ask me to the dance. I was a little... shocked, and a bit down to say the least. I ended up accepting an invitation from another stallion, Buck Withers,” she informed him, Evan stopping the story.

“Woah... hold on. You're saying that Shining didn't ask you and you went to this dance with some other guy?” he blurted out, Cadance smirking with a faint giggle.

“Well, hold on and let me finish the story first,” she told him, Evan nodding and shuffling around and sitting against the side of the truck box as he listened to the story. “His original plan was to first speak with me. Then, during his parade float incident, get the attention of the school to become Fall Formal King, and finally express his love to me as we danced,” she told him, to which he snickered.

“Which wasn't going as planed,” Evan laughed.

“Indeed not. As... strange, as he might have seemed, he was just so adorable. I demanded Twilight help me win her brother over and... well, she was a bit foalish and teased me a bit at first.” Evan rubbed his chin.

“So a geek fell for a princess and a princess fell for a geek-” she cut him short before he could continue.

“Sssh, let me finish,” she interrupted him as he had her. Holding his hands up defensively with a smirk, he let her continue. “Anyway, the prudish brute Withers was... well, prudish. So full of himself and what not. During the parade, when Shining's float crashed, he encouraged everypony to laugh at them, calling them names and such. Then, during the polo game, I overheard some mares talking about a mare Shining liked and how he was going to ask her to the dance. I assumed he was going to ask me but when I overheard those mares I came to conclusions that, since he hadn't asked me yet, I wasn't the mare he had in mind,” she informed him.

The man scrunched his nose. “Didn't he sing a song about you though?” Evan asked.

“A song about pink mares with tri-colored hair. Not specifically about me,” she informed him, the man grunting as he put his face into his palms. “Hey bozo, I could say the same about you. Now sush and just listen,” she ordered him with a teasing laugh.

“The whole night before the formal, I kept telling myself I didn't belong with Buck and that I knew, gut instinct, that Shining Armor was going to be my very special somepony. I even... convinced, my friends to see it the same way,” she mentioned, Evan leaning on his arm as he listened.

“I was a little weary going into the nightl, since I had heard he was going to ask somepony else. My friends and I concocted a plan that I'd arrive with Buck and then tell him I wasn't interested and then one of them could have him.”

Despite the constant lead up to the obvious ending, since Evan knew full well Cadance and Shining would have to get together since they were currently married, the man continued to listen with interest. “My aunt, Celestia, was... less than impressed with his attitude when she met him and he was all too full of himself, even in her presence.” Evan perked a brow and cut into the story, imagining the happening as he spoke.

“Did she...”

* * *

Celestia's body became coated in her magical aura as she hovered into the air and struck Buck Withers with a powerful surge of magical energy that had him vanish on the spot, never to be seen again as he was banished to the moon...

* * *

“Or maybe...” Evan's smile grew devious...

* * *

Guards tackled into the polo team captain and restrained him, the stallion wailing like a little filly as they cuffed him in a most painfully uncomfortable way. Looking to him with fiery eyes, Celestia motioned with her head and the guards dragged him out of her presence.

Dragging him over to a large cabinet, one of the guards pulled on a book, the cabinet sliding aside and revealing a secret entrance to the catacomb caves below. With a heave, they tossed the stallion down the steep incline, his screams soon silenced as the cabinet was returned to it's place and he was never heard from again...

* * *

“Or... OR MAYBE!” Evan began with laughter, before Cadance quickly interrupted him with a hysterical laugh.

“W-what hah-hah- what?!” she nearly fell over in laughter.

“Dude... dudette...” Evan said to Cadance. “That stallion totally disrespected Celestia, right to her face, so she obviously...” Evan trailed off and looked around to make sure the regal princess wasn't there to overhear him, though he was sure she'd figure out anyway. “Supreme tyrant ruler of all Equestria...” he looked around again before leaning in. “Banisher of loved siblings...” he looked around before leaning in to whisper into her ear. “Princess Sun-butt,” he said, Cadance immediately leaning back to giggle uncontrollably at her aunt's nicknames.

Evan perked a brow with a tilt of his head. “And she didn't at least... scorch his tail or something?” he asked, Cadance shaking her head as she calmed down from her fit of laughter.

“Oh goodness no. My aunt may have her moments but she's genuinely a good hearted mare,” she told him, the man rolling his eye before Cadance gave him a nudge. “Now sush and listen to my story,” she ordered, Evan leaning back. “So at the dance, I noticed Shining with a mare,” she stopped to giggle. “Or rather, one of his friends dressed as a mare,” she laughed, Evan gasping.

“WOAH! Shining was gay?” Evan blurted out, Cadance giving him a light smack to the back of his head. “Ow... hey?!” he grunted.

“He wasn't gay,” she replied back, Evan perking a brow.

“But... didn't you just say he went to the dance with his friend who was cross-dressed as a mare?” he asked, Cadance huffing with a slightly annoyed look.

“If you'd let me continue...” she trailed off, Evan nodding. “It was all part of his plan...” she noted. “But anyway, Buck tried to be romantic with me and get a kiss as soon as we had arrived, but I told him I didn't deserve a stallion like him and that we should just be friends,” she continued the story, the man raising a brow with a smirk.

'Friend-zoned?' he asked himself, then felt inner loneliness return as the voice of Derreck didn't answer. 'Nah...' Evan thought to himself. 'He sounds like a dick...'

“When I ditched him to go see Shining, I suppose things puzzled themselves together in Buck's mind because he became rather infuriated... which may have also been due to Shining's friends and their antics...” she told him about their supposed plan to have Buck lose his temper, poking him with a stick and powdering him with itching dust.

“I was just starting to speak with Shining when Buck came over, rather infuriated over the night's events. Before he could really say much however, I was announced as the formal's queen. However, much to many ponies' surprise, when Buck Withers was announced king, he began boasting about it rather rudely. There is something known as a sour-winner you know?” she told him, Evan perking a brow.

'He didn't lose his temper... he just became a boastful dick instead? Huh, never saw that coming,' Evan thought quietly, again distraught by the silence in his mind that followed.

“When Buck decided it was time for us to dance, Shining and his friends stood up to him, along with most of the crowd,” she told him. “With that, I plucked the king crown of Buck's head and placed it on Shining's, and finally expressed my love for him and he, in a way, did to me.”

Evan continued to lean on his arm but when she didn't continue, he rose a brow. “That's it?” he asked, Cadance giggling.

“Well, if you were to ask my husband he'd say 'And we're living happily into forever, because we shouldn't use past tense' or something mushy like that,” she smiled, Evan raising a brow.

“And apparently repelled a full on invasion of the capital city with your love... and became the leaders of an empire made of crystals and... yeah... you know..." Evan trailed off with a hearty smile. "That was actually a pretty good story, no word of a lie,” the man replied honestly.

“Really. You don't think it's stupid, or ridiculous or... homo-sexual?” she asked, Evan stifling a laugh.

“Well. It may be a bit mushy but I liked it. Less... absurdness, then the whole 'Our love repelled an entire army'-ness. It's a good story,” Evan told her, to which she smiled.

“Sometimes I do wonder though, what would have happened had circumstances been different. If things hadn't played out in our favor,” she mentioned. “Like you and your truck. And perhaps, something else?” she asked, the man listening before realizing she wasn't going to say much more.

“What?” he asked, Cadance sighing as she dipped her face into her front hooves.

“You and Twilight. Gosh! After everything she put up with for you and you're still together. You don't think that wasn't meant to be. She saw through you better than any of us, even if she couldn't tell the root of your problems... she loved you, tolerated you, and held you close. And I'm sure, in some way, you've done the same for her. So... don't you think it's time to talk about it?” she asked, motioning to the library.

For a moment, Evan was just still, just looking into the library and to his, or what he still in a way considered to be, his mother and now lover. “Y-yeah... yeah, I guess... I guess I should, huh?” he asked, Cadance nodding with a smile.

“See? It's nice to let the world in sometimes. We'll be inside. Don't take too long,” she said, leaning over and planting a kiss on his cheek before trotting into the library, leaving Evan with his thoughts. As he thought to himself, a coin hit him in the side of the head.

"AH! What?" Being torn back into reality, he shook his head in a blur of motion before looking to the coin, a Luna bit. Scratching his head, he was hit by another, grabbing his attention to the direction it was thrown from.

Looking over to a building near the library, he spotted a pony in a cloak, waving him over before disappearing into the shadows between the buildings. He paused for a moment before looking back to the coins. As he pondered his thoughts, he was again hit, this time by a larger Celestia bit. “Ow! Hey...” he muttered, looking back to the culprit who impatiently ushered him to come over before again disappearing into the alleyway.

“Oh for Celestia's...” he got up and walked over to the alley. “Hello... mysterious cloaked figure?” he asked, getting no response. “Hey... coin thrower... you... 'dropped' twelve hundred bits...” he called out, a little quieter as everything seemed a bit darker, a bit more ominous... and really eerie. A slow gust of wind blustered through the alley, picking up some scrap garbage and blowing it along.

“Over here, over here, over here,” called a whispering voice, prickling the hairs on the back of Evan's neck as he slowly walked into the alley.

“Hello... he-hello?” he asked before the same whispering voice echoed from behind him.

“Turn around, turn around,” it echoed, almost as if behind him. Evan swiveled on his heels, going to face his mystery pony but finding himself befronted by the empty alleyway. As he stood in uncertainty, his senses began to heighten. He began picking up on things that would otherwise be undetectable.

The smell of the garbage, or rather, each individual thing in said garbage. The sound of the gentle wind blowing past. The temperature holding steady at a comfortable temperature. The single bead of sweat rolling down his forehead... the hoofsteps behind him-

Twirling around and grabbing the suspect by the collar of his cloak, he continued to spin and heaved him up over his head, slamming the culprit into the ground and getting a feminine yelp as a report. “AHHH! OKAY, okay old buddy!” laughed a vaguely familiar voice as golden furred hooves pulled back on the cloak's hood. “Darn good to see you... and it seems you haven't lost your touch,” Daring chuckled as Evan helped her up.

“Daring?!... What the hay are you doing out here?” Evan asked curiously as he helped brush off her cloak.

“Oh you know. Just out and about, thought I'd come see my old buddy,” she answered, Evan perking an inquiring brow. “Yeah okay, so I need a favor, but don't worry, you'll be paid good,” she began Evan shaking his head. “Oh come on! You haven't even heard the details! It's not going to be some impossible trek up an unscathed mountain this time, I promise,” she whined teasingly.

“I'm retired Daring. I've got a foal on the way. I'm gonna be a dad,” he told her, Daring smiling.

“Wow, really?! Hey that's great. Awesome. It really is. I'm happy for you,” she congratulated him with a hug. However, just as Evan went to talk about things, Daring cut in. “Wait, hold on. You'll love this. It'll only take a few days and nopony will even know you were gone. I need a partner for this one. Somepony I can trust. Somepony who can cover my flank... and some darn fool accused you of being the best there is,” she tried to boast about him, which didn't help as he merely pushed past her, annoyed at her sudden switch from understanding to plain ignorant and self-centered about the task.

“Retired. Nice seeing you again, friend,” he quipped, Daring calling out.

“Oh come on man. We go into a cave near Appleloosa, grab The book of unlimited fantasies, and come back. It'll be easy,” she told him.

“Then do it yourself.” Daring briskly trotted up beside him.

“Ahuizotl and his goons might be there. Remember? 'Who's Ass-hat'?" she laughed about his one quip to some of Ahuizotl's goons. "Come on man, please?!” she called out. “This is the opportunity of a lifetime!” she told him but to no avail.

“I'll pass. Good luck Daring, goddess's speed,” Evan told her as he continued to walk back to the library.

“Fine. Whatever, I can do it myself anyway. I don't need your help. I just figured maybe we could have a best-buddy adventure together or something." She watched him as he didn't even pause. "Have fun with your boring life of being a dad!...” she called out, watching him walk away before realizing he was really walking out on her. “Oh...” she whispered to herself, feeling a slight tang of guilt reside in her stomach as she walked away, not daring to run after him and reveal herself to the townsfolk...

Evan walked up to the library doors and stopped for a moment, wondering what in Equestria he was going to say to Twilight. They loved each other, that much was obvious to each of them now, even if their relationship had hit a few bumps and... mountains, he was sure something could be worked out.

Entering the library, he saw the others all laughing and carrying on, talking about old times and new. Lassie was currently molesting Shining's face with her tongue, having somehow pinned him to the floor and was currently on top of him while Cadance giggled about it, Shining pleading for help.

Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Twilight were all speaking together, with Spike at Twilight's side gushing over Rarity. Walking over before anypony really noticed he had entered, he approached Twilight, the alicorn looking to him as they both tried to sputter out their words.

“You first,” they both said in unison before giggling inwardly.

“Okay,” they both nervously replied, again in unison fashion.

The duo stood there as things went silent. They both went to speak, both saying the other's name. Evan sighed as he looked to the mare in front of him. “Twilight I just wanted to say that... well, I...” he trailed off and Lassie huffed.

“We get it already, now kiss!” she called out. “Like this,” she gained everypony's attention as she looked down to the defenseless Shining Armor. “Oooh, I like you,” she said before pressing her lips to his and assaulting his throat with her tongue, Shining squirming uncomfortably beneath her and flailing his hooves like a helpless foal. “MWAH!” Lassie laughed before getting off him and walking up beside Cadance. “I can see why you like him,” she teased, Cadance giggling with a blush.

Twilight stepped closer to Evan, bringing his attention back to her. “Evan. I just... I just want to say that... ugh... oooh,” she huffed, getting a strange look from Evan.

“What?” he asked in an unsure way.

“N-nothing... it's nothing I just... oh goddess, I think I'm foaling,” she huffed, nearly collapsing against the man as her hindlegs wobbled and threatened to give out.

“W-what?” Evan stammered, the others all gasping in shock.

“E-Evan... oh goddess, I need to go to the hospital,” she told him, the man nearly frozen in place from the information. Lassie ran up and slapped the man in the back of the head, rather hard, nearly making him fall over.

“The hospital you idiot. Come on, we gotta get her there!” she ordered, Evan nodding.

“Y-yeah... yeah, right, right! We'll uhh... we can fly there-” Lassie slapped him again, harder this time.

“She can barely speak, let alone fly you nincompoop!” she nearly yelled, Evan blinking in shock.

“B-but... then how can we-” she stood up to her hindlegs and slapped some sense into him, the smacks audible throughout the library.

“Your truck, you overgrown child! CAAAAAAADAAAAAANCE!” she called out, the alicorn of love quickly standing to attention. “Not you Cadance, that Cadance!” Lassie pointed out to the truck, Dash quickly cutting in.

“You know, Cadance and I could probably just fly Twilight to the-” Lassie cut her short.

“NO! This is something Evan needs to do with her. Bonding and stuff. Goddess am I the only intelligent one here?! Evan, get this mare to a hospital already!” Lassie said as she tucked herself under one of Twilight's forelegs with Evan on the other side as they helped Twilight along to the red pickup truck.

Laying her down in the back seat, Lassie hopped in beside her then looked to Evan who was in a shocked daze. “Drive, the others can meet us there,” she ordered, Evan shaking off his daze as he scurried over to the driver seat and keyed the ignition, the truck rumbling to life as Twilight let out a yelp, Lassie coaching her through it.

“Hey, hey don't worry. Giving birth isn't as bad as ponies make it out to be,” Lassie told the mare who shot her a look.

“I'm having a foal! You have no idea what this feels like,” she remarked as Evan drove them towards the hospital, Lassie shooting her a stupid look.

“Pfft, BWAHAHAHA! I give birth to like... six to nine pups at a time, Miss I don't know what it feels like. Now just try to relax a bit... OH GODDESS!” Lassie gasped, Evan looking back in fright over his shoulder.

“What?! What's wrong?” he gasped in a frightened tone.

“No... no, nothing's wrong it's just... ohhh goddess it's everywhere,” Lassie groaned as she held up her soaked paws. “Oh man, you're never gonna get this clean. The fluids from birth just never comes out fabric,” she remarked.

“LASSIE!” Evan and Twilight both yelled in unison.

“What?! I'm just saying. If you had've gotten a Lariat edition with leather seats it would've been easier to clean."

“LASSIE!” They both yelled again.

“Okay jeez... sorry,” she muttered with a roll of her eyes. “Telling me I don't know what it's like and thinking I have no idea what I'm talking about. They have no idea what I'm talking about. Let's see them push out eight friggin babies in one sitting. I'll tell him when he's trying to clean this truck out of the smell...” she whispered under her breath just as Twilight groaned and winced. Lassie held Twilight's hoof and kept telling her it was alright, before looking down below and going wide eyed.

“Oh... my... SWEET CELESTIA!” Lassie screamed.

“WHAT?!” Twilight and Evan gasped out.

“Nothing... I just said that for dramatic effect," Lassie giggled, much to the annoyance of the others. “Hey, you're lucky you have a veteran with you. Could you guys imagine what anything would be like without me?” she laughed, Twilight flunking her head back down before smiling briefly.

“Definitely not the same... heh-heh... ugh...” she groaned before trying to sit up, Lassie quickly laying her back down.

“Trust me, it hurts more, just stay down... ewww... gross, it got in my mouth!” Lassie complained.

“E-Evan... Dgh... Evan I just wanted to say... that I'm sorry I cast you out... that I'm sorry I didn't tell you I... ahhh, goddess alive...” Twilight yelped out, Lassie quickly butting in.

“Evan, you should do more of the talking, and apologizing. Trust me, you don't have a frickin foal coming out of your... gaww, that's disgusting,” Lassie groaned, the two looking to her. “I just pictured a foal coming out of your dickhole,” she pretended like she was going to hurl.

“LASSIE!” they both grumbled in annoyance.

“What?! I'm just saying. Imagine that for a second and tell me it isn't the most disturbing thing you've ever seen,” the dog quipped. Twilight rolled her eyes before covering her face with her front hooves.

“T-Twilight I just...” Evan began, stammeringly and as nervous as he'd ever been. “I just wanted to say I'm sorry for not... not being truthful with you. I was just so... so scared. Afraid you'd throw me out. I didn't want you to-” Lassie cut him short.

“You past the hospital, numb nuts,” she remarked, Evan pulling a quick U-turn and driving back to the front of the hospital. Slamming the truck into park and rushing to his lover's side. He and Lassie helped the foaling alicorn out of the truck, Lassie yelling out to the hospital for pretty much all to hear.

“Hey you over paid twits! GET OUT HERE! THE PRINCESS IS FOALING FOR CELESTIA'S SAKE!” she screamed. Just as they were getting to the doors, a pair of nurses rushed out with a stretcher, helping Twilight onto it and wheeling her into the building with Evan at her side.

“Evan... I'm gonna be a mom. And you're... you're gonna be a dad,” she told him, the man swallowing hard as his knees began to buckle, a shiver going down his spine. He paused for a moment and everypony stopped.

Lassie looked to the man as he went a bit pale faced, finally getting up to speed with everything that was happening, having been stuck on the events back at the library until now. A faint smile came across his face as he staggered about, feeling a little light headed before collapsing in a heap...

Author's Note

Yes I know. I take forever with these updates. I R SOARY (Canadian accent)
Here, have a Derp Muffin as my apology...

Cheers eh

Chapter 76

'A family man, again...'

Evan's perspective...

The calm summer breeze brushed past us as we sat in the field together, Twilight and I. Sitting giggling together, we looked out to the pasture's open expanse, a warm smile on both our faces as we watched the kids play together.

Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle, Apple Bloom, Spike and our own son out playing in the field, flying a kite that they had made out of my T-shirt, just like in the old days. Leaning against me, Twilight rested her head into my shoulder with a content sigh.

“I love you,” she whispered comfortingly. I gently nuzzled against her and planted a kiss on her forehead.

“Me too,” I replied back, the love of my life giggling as she looked up to me.

“Oh really? You love yourself huh, what about me?” she teased, myself chuckling.

“You know what I mean,” I told her as I moved in for a kiss.

“Awwww, MOOOM! DAAAAD! GROSS!” Squeaked our son. I looked over to him and smiled before purposefully giving my wife a noisy smooch, much to his discomfort. He'd understand someday.

“Hey Evan,” Spike called out, gaining my attention. “Wanna come fly the kite?” he asked. I smirked to myself. I was a little old for that... ahh, who am I kidding? Nopony gets too old to fly kites.

I stood up but was stuck by sudden dizziness and lack of knowledge. It felt like the whole world was spinning a million miles a minute. I couldn't put my thoughts together as things became a mess of blurs and neon glows.

“Evan!” I heard Twilight call out as a wetness began to run down my nose. I stumbled around a little before thumping to the ground, more liquid oozing from my nose as the taste of blood became ever apparent...

I woke up, cold, back on the smooth, steely floor. Scrambling to my feet, I rubbed my hands up and down my arms, the darkness being so cold that I could see my breath. “You never get fully acclimatized to the cold,” came a frightening voice. I spun on my heels, turning to face the owner whom was now emerging from the darkness.

It only took me a second to realize who he... it, was, and what the hell was going on. “You here to try and finish me off again, prick?!” I snarled, Death just laughing.

“Well... I suppose I could, seeing as how your friend is missing. He was the only one who was always here to save you,” he mentioned, his comment striking hard. Derreck was always the one to come to my aid in times like this.

I decided to play a bluff and try to ward him off. “I don't need his help! I can take you on and crush you like a bug,” I challenged, a slight bit of fear escaping in the tone of my voice. Death only laughed.

“I needn't waste my time. You have ensured that your fate is sealed in the stone wall of time itself...” he trailed off and I felt my body being pulled forwards with him, both our bodies moving at a rapid pace.

Before I knew it, were were standing out on a lonely pasture hill overlooking the fields and Ponyville. My body tensed. “Yeah... so what?!” I snarled, wondering why he brought me here. Thunder boomed in the background as rain continued to pour down on us. Turning around he motioned with his head to a lone tombstone, unmarked and resting all by itself.

I didn't need him to tell me what he was implying. A shiver went down my back and my right hand clenched. I moved my body with ease and grace, with speed that could match nearly any but ended up stumbling as I hit nothing but air.

I staggered forwards, my entire momentum having been put into the hit with the expectation of my fist striking bone. Looking around, I heard a sinister voice. “If you are so confident, then so be it.”

I readied myself but was not expecting what came. A magical blast struck me dead center of my chest, hammering me back and skidding me along the ground. Looking up, I quickly rolled to the side, dodging a second blast of magic.

A dark cloud slowly approached, it's hellish red eyes staring me down as a purple fume dragged alongside those eyes. 'How do I fight a cloud?' I asked myself but as it drew near, it formed into the shape of a stallion.

“You...” I muttered. It was that stallion from one of my dreams. The king of shadows or something...

A dragged out exhale, almost a hiss, left his mouth. 'Nevermind then... how do I fight a stallion? Easily,' I smirked confidently as I rushed him. Half expecting to move at sonic speeds, I was baffled when my body could only move at a sluggish run, which left me wide open when the stallion's horn lit up and hammered me back with a black energy blast.

The impact sent me hurtling back and crashing into a tree which snapped at the trunk as my body slammed through it. I thought for sure my spine would've broke but I hardly had even a bruise, but the pain still resided deep down.

Crawling to my hands and knees to get up, I barely even managed a yelp as my body was hit again, launching me through several more trees, two of which collapsed on top of me when I finally came to a painful stop.

My hands grabbed the trunk as I attempted to push them off my body but found myself incredibly weak. I could barely even budge it! How was this possible?! I used to have powers unmeasurable. I could strike down any stallion with just a swat of my hand.

An explosion rocked the ground nearby and blasted the trees, along with my body, away. I came to a skidding stop and groaned, blood dripping from my mouth as I found myself too weak to stand, instead residing on my hands and knees as Sombra approached.

“How does it feel? To be powerless? To be pathetic and weak? Unable to stop even a stallion?” he sneered. My body tensed as I drew down deep. This was my only chance. I let out a roar of anguish as I leapt up and plowed my fist into his cheek, only to have my blow come to a painful stop as it barely even budged him.

He looked to me with a smirk as he stood to his hindlegs, and used his front hooves to give me a quick one-two to the face which had such tremendous force it sent me crashing to the ground, leaving a crater around me.

I lay painfully on the ground as Sombra laughed maniacally, slowly approaching. “He was right. You are weak. Just a useless old man,” he cackled. It didn't make any sense. Sure I was old, but I had aged respectably and should still be able to hold my own against even him.

It hit me hard. What if I was lying to myself? What if I was just a useless old man now? I felt a great depression come over me. What if I wasn't of any use anymore... my body felt feeble and weak, barely able to even lift itself.

“Yes... that's it. Let it flow through you... accept it,” Sombra howled. His horn became imbued in a dark sinister aura, lowering his head to point it at me. I tried to brace myself but couldn't even manage that. I had been beaten... defeated by a mere stallion...

I felt a powerful explosion rock the ground beneath me and the blast forced my eyes to squint shut...

Yet even so, I didn't feel it actually strike me. Looking up to where Sombra once stood, I was left in awe as all that remained was a cloud of smoke. A soft melody began to play and gained my attention to a cold presence that struck the very nerves of my senses.

Nightmare Moon slowly approached, a heavy sway in her pace as she walked with utmost intimidation. Looking in the opposite direction, I spotted Sombra recovering from the blast, part of his robe destroyed and armor slightly battered. “You FOAL! I will destroy you!” he roared, charging forwards at full tilt.

Nightmare continued her slow, swayed pace, seemingly unconcerned with his charge. My eyes widened. Surely she couldn't just take the brunt of his charge like that?... Could she?

Just as impact seemed imminent, Nightmare simply vanished. Sombra stumbled forwards, looking around in shock. “WHAT?!” He boomed in fury, head turning from side to side in a blur of motion.

Before either of us could rightfully react, Nightmare seemed to sketch back into view just above him. One of her hind legs drove down hard against the back of his neck and plowed him into the dirt.

Slowly fluttering down, she laughed at him in a nearly frightening tone. “You are the foal here! You may be the darkness, but I am the ruler, the eternal goddess, of the night that brings about your darkness!” she boomed in her regal voice.

Sombra growled inwardly as he charged forwards with utmost fury, raging blasts emitting from his horn and slamming into Nightmare. I gasped as I watched in horror, explosions erupting from where she had once been. Sombra came to a screeching halt and looked onward with a dark smile that barred his teeth.

“I believe you are mistaken,” he chuckled knowingly. His smile was suddenly erased as Nightmare materialized right in front of him, time seeming to stand still as he looked in shock and awe to the mare just inches in front of him whom he was certain he had destroyed.

“W-wha-” he was cut off as Nightmare twirled her body in a split second, cocked her hindlegs and bucked him flat in the chest with enough force that even I could feel the shock wave from it.

Sombra slammed painfully into a tree which snapped under the force but had enough stopping power to halt his flight path. I looked to him in awe. Where he had been totally annihilating me during our entire fight, Nightmare was making mockery of him. His body was batter, blood dripping from his lip, armor cracked...

He painfully struggled to his hooves and fired a powerful blast towards Nightmare.

Firing a blast right back, the two connected and the flight path was redirected into the air where they promptly erupted. “YOU WILL FEAR ME!” Sombra roared, his body tensing, horn glowing as his entire body was coated in a black and purple aura.

“I will show you true fear,” Moon replied as a powerful dark blue aura amassed around her body. Unlike Sombra's however, her's did not stay close to her body and follow her figure. Instead the aura was violent, pushing straight outward and created a whirlwind around her. Static electricity coursed around her body, crackling in the air and creating a feel of great tension. Sombra let out a roar as he fired a volley of violent energy blasts that collided with Nightmare, shaking the very planet itself. It was all I could do but hug the ground for dear life.

After a few moments, I looked back up as my jaw hung slightly agape while I panted. That couldn't have been the end. Had Nightmare actually underestimated Sombra? She seemed so relaxed and calm that surely she...

My jaw, along with Sombra's, dropped low as Nightmare slowly walk through the smoke that had formed from the explosions. Her aura became so powerful that the coloration around us, and of the world itself, began to change on a regular basis, each one of her steps causing the color to shift again.

She was truly an incarnation of fear... no, she was THE very pinnacle of fear itself... I watched in awe as she continued forwards. Sombra snarled and dragged one of his front hooves through the dirt like a bull.

Letting out a roar, Sombra rushed forwards and leapt through the air, attempting to deliver a powerful bucking kick to Nightmare. The impact force was massive, so much so it shook the ground but even so it didn't even budge Nightmare a millimeter, not even staggering her slow pace. The offset force of momentum had Sombra crashing to the ground while Nightmare took flight with utter grace. It was like she was merely mocking him, not even tapping into her true potential.

“Nopony alive can surmount to my power! NOPONY!” Sombra roared at the top of his lungs as an orb of magic energy formed atop of his head. “NOW FACE YOUR DEMISE!” He hollered as the magical orb was launched.

Nightmare stopped mid-flight and looked down upon him with disgust. “Is that the best you can muster?!” she yelled in her royal voice. Just as the massive blast neared her, it slowly came to a stop.

Sombra gasped and tried to force it forwards, struggling on the spot as he fought with an invisible force. Moon's horn began to glow bright and just seconds later the blast began to hurtle back towards Sombra at a faster speed than he had launched it.

His eyes went wide as he let out a shriek of fear. “IMPOSSIBLE-” He roared out just as his own blast came back down and erupted in a massive explosion of fury that caused a mushroom cloud, the shock wave hammering me back into the ground, torrents of energy and wind blustering past...

I lay there in my crater with my eyes half lidded. 'Holy shit... perspective changes when you're not the one doing the ass kicking...' I thought meekly just as a worried voice came over.

“Derreck? Derreck are you there?” she asked. I groaned and Nightmare looked down at me from the edge of the crater. “Der... you're not Derreck,” she mentioned and I nodded in acknowledgment.

“Yeah... I'm... ugh, the other one...” I groaned in pain, Nightmare frowning just slightly.

“I should have known. Derreck's power shadows your own and he would never have needed help against an insignificant threat like that... no offense,” she mentioned, to which I rolled my eyes. She was right though. I doubt with great certainty that Sombra would've barely even touched Derreck...

Nightmare lent a hoof to me, which I graciously took, grunting as she helped me up. “Ugh man... what a beating...” I complained, the alicorn goddess smirking at me.

“Perhaps you should have kept up with your training like Derreck,” she commented. I stretched myself out but the pain didn't deter in the slightest.

“Yeah maybe... but I guess that's where we're different...” I replied, a sudden surge of fear hitting me deep. Nightmare was... oh sweet Celestia, she was pregnant... that meant Derreck, or I suppose me... , no, just Derreck, was the father... and I had killed him... and since she wasn't trying to rip my throat out at the moment, that meant she-

“Speaking of, where is Derreck?" she asked, as though finishing my thought. "He said he'd meet us later but never came around, then Lassie got word the two of you had suffered a heart attack, or well... your body, suffered a heart attack,” she noted, knowing that we used to share a body, or rather that he and I were the same person. “Yet I haven't heard from Lassie since. I do hope everything is all right,” she voiced her worry. My heart skipped a beat as I swallowed hard.

'The buck am I going to tell her?' I thought quietly. She'd split me in half and beat me to a pulp in a second if she found out what I did. “I-”

There was a thundering eruption that shook the ground beneath us. The planet, our world, began to separate, bright glowing beams of light shooting up through the cracks in the surface. “BE GONE, VILE BEAST!” Boomed a regal voice.

“BUCK!” I swore, knowing the voice off by heart. It was Luna. Nightmare stanced herself to fight the alicorn but I felt a pit in my stomach arise. I may have betrayed Derreck in some way... perhaps I was selfish for doing it... who knows. But I knew Nightmare was good now, and I wouldn't let her be vanquished for past decisions.

If there was one good thing Derreck did in his time and left behind, it was be her. I nudged Nightmare and lipped my words to her. 'Run, they can't know you exist.'

She gave me a nod and with that simply vanished into thin air. Luna let out a cry of terror. “NO! WHERE HAS SHE GONE?!” She called out, flying down towards me and landing a few feet away.

I blinked dully as Luna looked to me in panic, rushing up to me. “Do you know where she went?!” she asked in panic and I just blinked as I shrugged.

“Rah unno,” I mumbled, acting confused. She stood up to her hindlegs and placed her front ones on my shoulders.

“Evan, this is very important. You can not allow her to invade your thoughts. She will, as she did me, possess your mind. Twist your thoughts into anger and hate then corrupt and control your very soul itself. You can't-” I cut her short.

“What?” I asked in a baffled way.

“Just believe me. Don't listen to her poisoned words as they will destroy even the ones you love. It happened to me... please, tell me. What happened?” she asked. I scratched the back of my head.

“Uhh... well, at first I was in a meadow with Twilight having a picnic with our kid... and the Cutie Mark Crusaders... and then uhh... I collapsed and blood was running from my nose... and then Death tried to kill me... and then King Sombra tried to kill me and then uhh... Nightmare Moon came and saved me... and then uhh... you showed up and uhh... now we're here,” I replied with a hesitant chuckle. “It makes no sense. Believe me, it's about as goofy as it gets,” I assured her.

She blinked and inspected me, trying to decipher what I had said. “Are you positive? Believe me, Nightmare Moon is evil and if she possesses you, it could create disaster for all of Equestria,” she informed me.

“Uhh... okay?” I stammered, still acting confused. As thought a lightbulb flicked on, Luna's demeanor did a complete 180.

“Oh that's right, you need to wake up!” she chimed in an upbeat voice.

“Wake up?” I asked and she nodded.

“Well of course, this is all just a dream. You fainted in the hospital while Twilight was in labor. But you should really wake up soon and be there with her and your newborn daughter,” she noted and I perked a brow.

“A daughter?” I asked, a little confused. I thought in my... epiphany, I had a son...

“Yes, why? Were you expecting a colt?” she asked but I shook my head.

“No, I wasn't expecting a... It's just a little... I'm soaking it all in... being a dad, you know?” I asked and Luna smiled warmly.

“Truly a glorious moment in your life, here, let me-” as her horn touched my forehead everything went bright white...

* * *

I nearly lunged up with a gasp, Luna stumbling back. “GAH... I... WHA...” I panted before everything started coming to. “What?” I asked as Luna repostured herself. “OH SNAP... Yeah, come on, let's go,” I said as I hopped out of the medical bed, following Luna down the halls of the hospital. She led the way as I followed... huh, sure beat sneaking around in a cardboard box...

“It's just up ahead-” Luna was cut off by a blood curdling scream that had the fur, and my hair, on the back of our necks spiked up as we ran towards the scream of agony. Rushing into the room, we spotted... well, everypony really.

Celestia was there, along with Twilight's family; her father, her mother, Shining Armor, Cadance... all of her friends, Lassie... and the gray doctor I didn't really get along with... whom was staggering around with a limp hoof held close to his chest.

My blank stare was met with furious eyes as I looked to him and he to me. “Well at least I know where she gets it from. She obviously shares her father's... tenacity!” He scowled as he limped past me and stormed off.

“I uhh... did I miss something?” I asked, Pinkie piping up.

“Well, besides your daughter being born, no not really,” she sped through her sentence quite quickly which left me a little curious. Was there something about it that I missed and that's why the doctor gave me that look?

“So... how come Grumpy Pants gave me the...” I trailed off and Lassie snickered before bursting into a fit of laughter.

“Oh it was great. He was all like 'Here, let me take her now. We'll just give her a quick check up and she'll be right back with you in no time'.” Lassie was acting out what it looked like. “Then he went to pick up Twilight's... your guys' kid and the filly was all like 'WAHHHHH' and when he began to pick her up she was like-” Lassie made a motion like she grabbed something and snapped it with her front paws. “And then the doctor was like 'WAHHHHHHH!' and we were all like 'AHHHH' cause he dropped the baby and Celestia was all like-” Lassie trailed off and pulled a pair of sunglasses and cigar out of her fur, promptly putting the glasses on then sticking the cigar in her mouth before striking a pose. “Thugnificent, and totally caught the baby with her magic like a real OG.”

We all looked to her with blank expressions, most of us raising a brow. “Whaaaat?” she asked as she put the cigar and glasses away. “It's a true story,” she exclaimed. Celestia let out a gentle laugh.

“Perhaps based on one but I do remember things being a little less... elaborate,” she said with a giggle, the others joining in. Lassie let out a huff and crossed her front legs and went to say something but stopped as I placed my hand on her head and gave her a gentle pet.

Smiling up to me she gave me a wink which I tried to return but ended up just smiling instead. “Evan,” called out a soft voice, gaining all of our attention to the mare in the hospital bed. “Come here.” She nodded me over.

I nearly stumbled over me own feet as I nervously walked over to my mo... to Twilight. As I neared her side, she lifted up our filly daughter to me. “Here, cradle her,” she offered and my legs nearly gave out as I swallowed hard.

“B-b-b-bu... but I... I uhh...” I could barely grasp what was going on. Twilight giggled.

“Here, don't worry, you'll do fine, it's not hard,” she assured me.

“B-but w-wha... what if I drop her?” I blurted out to which Celestia simply laughed.

“Fear not. I'll just... Lassie, may I?” she asked as she picked up the cigar and glasses before striking the pose, making Lassie cackle in laughter.

“See! At least SHE of all ponies has a sense of humor,” she told the others.

Cautiously, and rather hesitantly, I slowly cradled the small newborn earth filly into my arm. “W-woah... she's so... so small...” I said, noting how she was barely the length of my forearm.

“Don't let her size deceive you... she'll snap your arm, just like the doctor's,” Lassie quipped. I was nearly struck in awe as I looked into the eyes of... of my daughter... I began to feel a little light headed again as I slowly handed her back to Twilight.

“H-here... I uhh... I need to sit down again I think...” I stammered with a deep exhale...

* * *

Days past and Twilight and I returned to the library. Things were... different, but we were slowly working out my flaws, one at a time. For the time being I was sleeping on the couch, which I kind of deserved. I could have easily just returned to the estate but... I guess the library just seemed like home...

“Yupp, just like that,” Twilight told me as she coached me through how to cradle our filly as we sat on the couch together.

The filly made several baby goos and gahs while she waved her front hooves up at me. “I... ha... huh, I uhh...” I stammered, still getting used to it.

“You're doing great, honey,” Twilight told me as she kissed me on the cheek. I still... I was getting... I was trying to strain myself into understanding that she wasn't my mother. It was so hard. Derreck's mind 'game' he had played on me was still rooted deep in my mind.

I could understand that... well, sort of understood that she wasn't my mother but it still felt weird not to address her as so. It would take time but without Derreck's mental restraints holding me back, there were a lot of things I could understand more clearly now, and her not being my mother was one of them.

“You sure I can't come with you to your parents?” I asked and Twilight giggled as she kissed me on the nose.

“I'd love to bring you along, really I would. But there's a lot of books that are going to be returned in the next two days, and some of them have been put on a waiting list for others so the library really needs a pony here running things,” she told me, Lassie pouting.

“I told you, Spike and I can handle it,” she whined with Twilight rolling her eyes in response.

“After the last time... I... heh-heh, sorry Lassie, but I'll have to pass on that offer,” she chuckled, Lassie giving a frown which I joined in on.

“Yeah... how come you couldn't just get somepony else to do it,” I complained. Twilight gave me a loving smile before giving me another kiss.

“I told you already, silly. Everypony is busy. Rainbow Dash is heading to the academy for a little while, Pinkie is-” I cut her off.

“I know, I know... I just... I mean after all that time, I kinda wanna make it up to-” I was cut off by a series of knocks at the door. I perked a brow. That was... weird. The sign said the library was open...

Author's Note

"I was wondering when you'd arrive," spoke a regal voice, perking both our attention as Lassie and I spun on our heels to face the voice.

"Celestia?! What the hay are you doing here?!" I gasped alongside Lassie. The regal princess continued to slowly walk forward before stopping just a few feet away from us.

"You still haven't figured it out? I guess it's true that you can't teach an old dog new tricks..."

* * *

SEE! I already have part of the next chapter done I just... I get totally swamped in life problems and stuff like that, then procrastinate and... I'm really sorry, but SEE, SEE, I do have parts of the next chapter done!
Ahem, cheers... (Don't hate on Princess Tia, pwease, just look at her all cute and cuddly)

Chapter 77

'The good and bad things of life...'

Earlier,

Third person...

The train to Ponyville station arrived promptly and on time, a rather normal occurrence for the small town. Ponies exited the cabin cars left, right and center as some of the railway employees unloaded crates and boxes from the freight cars.

As the crowd of ponies began to fizzle out, a final pony from one of the cabin cars emerged, body cloaked and facial features hidden behind her hood. A unicorn horn emerged from the confines of the hood as the unicorn spoke. “Okay... where are you?”

Trotting along in the most inconspicuous manner, the lone unicorn traversed through the town. Originally having went to The Burdick Estate to find the man, the pony had only been met by the butler whom had informed that Evan had returned to Ponyville for the time being.

Trotting casually through town, the figure took in the sights, smiling inwardly as smiling ponies traversed and attended to their everyday tasks all around town. Looking around and trying to decipher where he would be, the pony decided against asking a pony at random for directions, not wanting to arise suspicions.

Walking along, the enticing aroma of fast food hit the unicorn's nostrils and caused a fairly mild craving to win her over. Walking into the Tim Horseton's, the unicorn mare made diligent to keep her facial feature's covered as to avoid discovery.

Heading up to the cashier, the ever friendly mare running the counter gave her a smile. “Good morning Miss, what can I get you today?” Mary asked in a usual bubbly voice.

The unicorn's stomach grumbled as her mouth salivated from the smell of freshly cooked pastries. As she pondered the thought, she licked her tongue before speaking. “Yes, get me a... I'll have a few chocolate glazed doughnuts,” she replied, the cashier mare typing it in.

“Okay, that'll be twenty three bits,” she answered, the unicorn giving an estranged look that was hidden from view by her hood.

“Uhm... really? For... just a few doughnuts?” she asked, the mare blinking as she looked it over.

“Oh, shoot, darn... uhm... hold on...” Mary stammered as she began typing away at the register yet continued to make errors. “Uhm... I uhh...” she began to fumble her words as she nervously began nibbling her lower lip. “This thing must be broken again... here! Take these!” she nearly cried out as she handed over a small pastry box.

The unicorn blinked in uncertainty as the mare looked nervously at her. “Uhm... thanks?” the unicorn replied before slowly stepping out of the establishment.

As she walked down the street, she thought back on the ditzy cashier mare. “What a loon,” she thought quietly as she opened up the box of pastries, only to find muffins, not doughnuts. “Ditz...” the mare muttered as she stowed away the box of muffins, having lost her craving.

On the search again, she heard a cry from above. Looking up to the sky, she spotted a blur of gray spiraling down towards her. Leaping out of the way, she lost her balance as the gray blur slammed into the ground where she had just been, the shock wave of force from the impact knocking the unicorn off her hooves.

The mare lay there on the ground for a moment, eyes closed as she thought to herself. 'What a cooky town...' With a groan, she went to get up, only to find a hoof reached down to her.

“I'm so sorry. I just don't know what went wrong,” the pegasi mare apologized. Looking up to the pegasus pony, the unicorn accepted her help and stood up with a slight grunt. Now back to all fours, the unicorn managed a better look at what once was a mere blur of color.

'A MAILPONY!' the unicorn thought triumphantly. 'Certainly she'll know where he lives,' she smiled. “Hey, uhm...” the unicorn began, pausing so the pegasus could introduce herself, which never ended up happening.

“I'm so sorry. I was delivering mail and I must have hit turbulence...” Derpy informed, the unicorn rolling her eyes.

“It's alright. I think everypony is fine... say, you wouldn't by chance know somepony, would you? Actually, he's a somebody,” the mare stated, Derpy tilting her head with a rather silly look, which was her regular expression however.

“Oooh! Are you a detective pony?” Derpy asked in an enticed voice, the unicorn shaking her head with a hearty chuckle as to not arouse suspicion.

“No-no. I'm just an old friend of his,” she replied, Derpy thinking to herself.

“Hmm... well I don't know who your friend is but I know lots of ponies around here who are friendly,” she answered, the mare sighing.

“His name is Evan,” the unicorn informed Derpy, whose head perked right up at the mention of him.

“EVAN?! I know him! He's my bestest best friend ever! He's so great, he comes to visit me in the hospital when I get hurt and sneaks me in muffins and we play boardgames and we hangoutAndWeAdventureTogetherAndHeSavedMyLif-” she began to blurb her sentence in excitement, the unicorn mare quickly cutting in.

“Yeah, he's reallyswell. Can you by chance tell me where he lives?” she asked, Derpy nodding.

“Well of course. He lives at the Golden Oak Library. He used to live in a really cool mansion in the woods that he-” The unicorn left as the dopey mailpony continued to ramble on, somehow unaware the unicorn had left.

Lingering through the town, the cloaked unicorn slowly made her way to the library that Derpy spoke of. Taking a quick look over her shoulder, she faced the door and gave a few brisk knocks, not noticing the 'Open' sign...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

“It's open,” I called out but there was another set of knocks. I handed our child back to Twilight. “Here, I'll get it. I'm not exactly sure I can take care of her by myself, even if it's only for a few seconds,” I joked with a smile before heading for the door.

Just before reaching for the door knob, there was another few knocks. “Yeah-yeah, I'm right here... keep your panties on...” I muttered before opening the door to greet the...

A shiver went down my spine as I looked to the cloaked figure who quickly pulled me into a hug. “Hey killer! How yah been?!” chimed a vividly familiar voice, her way of addressing me crushing my esteem.

“Uhm... ahem... mmm,” I tried to clear my throat as I stepped outside with her, leaving the door slightly open. “H-hey, Echo...” I stammered as she pulled back her hood.

“Damn... you really are old. Derreck wasn't kidding about aging better than you,”she teased, myself swallowing hard.

“Y-yeah... the years haven't been nice to me,” I replied, Echo giving me a playful push.

“Aww, come on, can't be that bad,” she smiled, myself sighing. “Say... by chance is Derreck around? Gosh I stopped by your mansion, swanky place by the way, but your butler said to come here and find you. That you'd know where he is,” she told me and my heart skipped a beat as my stomach twisted.

“Y-yeah... about that, I-” she cut me off while looking past me and into the library.

“I mean, how hard is it to find a one of a kind guy like that? He shouldn't be that hard to find but I guess I was wrong, right?” she asked, myself closing my eye.

“He uhh... he's... it's hard to explain,” I answered as I rubbed my forehead, Echo looking to me.

“Well, it can't be that hard, I mean... come on, he's either here or somewhere else, right?” she asked. I bit my lip.

“It's a fair bit more complicated than that,” I answered, Echo brushing it off.

“Well... I mean, how much more complicated can it be. He's gotta be somewhere, right?” she asked and I shook my head.

“Depends on how you look at it. I suppose you could say... he would be right here... but he never really was anywhere,” I answered and she looked to me with a quizzical expression.

“What do you mean he wasn't anywhere? Are you feeling alright?” she asked, a little confused by what I had meant. Rubbing my forehead harder, I let out a sigh.

“I'm doing just fine. Listen... uhh... Derreck... he was never real,” I told her, to which she gave me a funny look.

“You sure you're feeling alright?” she poked, myself nodding. “Oh come on, cut it out. Where is he?” she insisted and I sighed.

“Listen, Derreck was never real. He didn't exist,” I told her and Echo let out a huff.

“Okay seriously. Knock it off. I know he was real. I saw him. I heard him. I felt him. There's no way he wasn't real,” she quickly replied back.

“Listen I'm telling you. He was never real, not on a physical plane of existence,” I said in a firm voice, one that had her stop for a long pause, motionless.

She swallowed hard. “No... no!” she began to panic slightly. “No, no way. He has to be real. There's no way he can't be!” she cried out. Out of my peripheral vision I noticed Twilight standing up to take a look, my attention drawn away from Echo as her panic worsened. “He... he has to be real. I wouldn't have a foal if it weren't for him!” she cried just as I turned around to calm her.

“Echo, relax! He... it's complicated, just listen, I'll explain it!” I told her in a stern voice.

“Evan, is everything alright?” Twilight called out, myself quickly peeking back in and giving her a thumbs up.

“Peachy. Just talking with an old friend. Nothing to worry about,” I assured her, herself smiling back as I quickly stepped back outside and gently shut the door behind me, pulling Echo off to the side of the library and away from the view of pedestrians.

“Listen... whatever Derreck did to me... he did to you too,” I told her and she gave me a weird look.

“Really... he... to you?” she asked in a slightly curious voice.

“Yeah... well, a little differently, but kinda the same,” I told her and she nodded with a snicker.

“Well, duh. I mean, you're not a mare,” she chuckled, my brow risen.

“Huh? I don't... nevermind. Listen, when I was young, I was traumatized as a child. With that traumatization came mental illusions that manifested itself into Derreck. I literally, heart and soul, believed he was there, a separate entity. Back on my world, there wasn't any magic... so it was just him inside my mind. But here... somehow, he... I, we... yeah I don't know how but him and I, we obtained magical abilities. He must have messed with you mind in a way similar to the way he did mine,” I told her, Echo blinking unsurely.

“Seriously? I mean... come on, you guys look nothing alike,” she mentioned.

I let out a sigh, deciding against trying to explain how his nearly unrivaled connection with magical abilities allowed him to take on a separate look. “I told you it was complicated... hey, enough with that, it's really good to see you,” I said, giving her a hug. “How have you been?” I asked in an upbeat tone.

“Well...” she said, trailing her hoof in circles on the ground. “I-I-I'm p-pregnant,” she stammered and my eye went wide.

“N-no shit? Wait, I thought you said you couldn't... because of Liquid?” I asked bashfully, having been unaware beforehand but now that she mentioned it... she was kind of showing.

“Derreck... I guess you, whoever... you don't know? I thought you said you were one in the same?” she asked and I shook my head.

“I uhh...” I trailed off, not wanting to tell her what happened between us. “He's separate, even in memory and thoughts so I can't really remember things that went on with him. Only some, and even then it's mostly a just a garbled, blury mess,” I replied with a sigh, rubbing the back of my neck. “But jeez. Pregnant huh? Gosh, I hope he's a good guy. Are you ever going to introduce us? Man... we should get together and chat sometime, it's been a while,” I chuckled with a smile.

“W-well... f-f-funny you should say that... heh... it's Derreck, err, well... you,” she whispered softly, so quietly and shyly I could barely make out what she had said.

“What do you mean Derreck and me?” I asked, a little lost.

“If you are Derreck and he is you than...” she looked to me with a smile. “You're a father,” she said and I cocked a brow. How did she know that?

I took a quick look through the window of the library to see my mother cradling our child... err, NO... Twilight! Twilight was cradling our child... gosh, it was gonna be hard to get that out of my head.

“Huh... been reading the newspapers eh?” I asked, figuring the tabloids probably made it clear Twilight had a foal.

“What?” she asked with a confused look.

“Me, being a father... I mean, that's how you found out I was a dad right?” I asked and she gave me a slightly confused look before shaking her head.

“N-no... no, silly. I mean... you have another foal?” she asked and I rose a brow.

“Another?” I asked, the words slipping from my mouth. 'Shit... I guess there's Nightmare Moon but hardly anypony knows about her,' I thought silently, Echo's voice breaking my concentration.

“I... jeez, can I just talk with Derreck? He'd know about all this already,” she asked and I swallowed hard.

“He's uhh... uhm, ahem. He's just resting right now.” I scratched the back of my head before something came to mind and it snapped together like a puzzle... she hadn't shown up with another stallion... and she had shown up to see me... and said...

“Oh shit...” I muttered out bluntly, Echo giving me a shocked look.

“W-what?!” she asked, a little worried.

“N-no... no, you're not saying that...” I swallowed pretty hard. I felt my stomach twist into a knot.

“What's wrong?” Echo asked. “Aren't you happy about this?” she asked. “I know Derreck has had many lovers, but we had something special, right?” she asked just as I butted in.

“Listen Echo... Echo it's not that easy... I don't... I can't-” I began to backpedal, feeling my world crumble around me. Twilight had only just forgiven me for Derreck's convoluted aggression but how would she react to this?

Her magic grabbed me and pulled me closer to her. “Hey!” she yelled in a firm voice. “You're not abandoning me, are you?! You're not just some dead beat that knocks up a mare and ditches, leaving her to raise the foal on her own, ARE YOU?!” she yelled, starting to gain the attention of passers-by.

I pulled her aside and put a finger to her lips. “Sssh... shit... Echo listen I... I never wanted any of that to happen. All I wanted to do was set things straight, help you see past the anger and hatred of revenge, have you see the light. I don't control what happens when Derreck... listen, I-” she cut me off as she calmed down just ever so slightly.

“R-right... sorry, I... I kinda forgot that you and Derreck are sorta different yet the same... it's all very... with the foal and the... can I just speak with him, since this is important? It'd be easier to speak with him,” she asked. I felt my heart skip again.

“N-no... no, you can't,” I answered, Echo giving me a stare.

“And why the hay not?! Are you trying to hide him from me?! He's not like you is he? Humping and dumping mares?! Look, he gave me his make, made me his mare!” she yelled at me, showing me the faint scar of a bite on her neck that made me flinch.

“I-it's not like that. I've been ever faithful to Twilight my entire life. I don't go around putting it in random mares. I wouldn't do that. Fuck... Derreck!” I growled, Echo's glare still hounding me.

“Fine, whatever. I get it that you're monogamous. Just let me talk to my mate,” she said, the last words striking a painful nerve. 'How many mares did Derreck bone anyway? For fuck sakes!'

“Y-you... you can't,” I told her, Echo stepping closer.

“For Celestia's sake Evan, don't make me smack him out of you. I'll knock you out again even if it means Derreck will get mad at me, so long as I can see him. He needs to know!” she yelled.

“He can't!” I told her sternly.

“And why not?! Is he going to try and weasel his way out of fatherhood like you?” she insulted angrily.

“I never cheated my way out of fatherhood, none that I set into action anyway,” I countered, Echo just scoffing.

“Whatever. Just let me see him already. He'll be a man about this,” she insisted, making my stomach further twist.

“I already told you... he can not see you...” I trailed off but spoke up just as she was about to say something. “He's dead, alright!” I shouted out, Echo pausing for a moment.

“H-he... he can't be! You said yourself you two are the same person. So you'd have to be dead too,” she implied.

“No... no, he wasn't... the body, my body. It wasn't killed... he was always a figment of my imagination, one that eventually manifested itself into a physical identity through the magic of this world but was irregardlessly still just an imaginary figure.”

“So... what the hay happened?! Where's my mate?” she asked, starting to break down. Goddess... I hated it when she called him that, it made me feel even worse about this...

“He... he started to get out of control... out of hand. I was... Luna and I confronted him and he left us no choice,” I told her, Echo stepping back.

“Y-you what?! How could you?! He loved you like a brother!” she shouted.

“No, Echo. He didn't. He was just using me, probably no different than how he was using you,” I told her honestly, but she'd have none of it as she slapped me across the face, hard enough to make it sting pretty bad.

“He didn't use me. I was the one who had played you until I saw the error of my ways... and to say he didn't love you... when I knocked you unconscious that night so you could get some sleep, and he arose and went to strike me down for merely putting you to sleep against your will... what do you call that?! He watched over you, he loved you more than anypony could've loved you... and you just stabbed him in the back, like a filthy rat! Some friend you are!” she scolded me, her words piercing me like daggers.

“Echo I-” she cut me off as tears began to flood her eyes.

“No! NO! Just save whatever speech or bullshit you're about to give me. Derreck was a better man than you can ever hope to be. Now my foal will grow up without a father... with me to raise it alone, all because of you!” she shouted, making me bite my lip. Dipping her head quickly, I watched as my old holy necklace I had given her slipped off her neck.

Throwing it at me, she yelled once more before taking off. “Enjoy your perfect life!”

I went to chase after her but when I rounded the side of the library and reached the streets, she was nowhere to be seen. I focused hard to try and sense her, but came up with nothing...

A sudden bump to my side knocked me back into reality, and off balance. I tumbled to the ground with a thump as I let out a surprised and rather shocked yelp. “Ooops!” Came an ever friendly, and bubbly, voice. “Evan! There you are!” Derpy said as she reached down and helped me back to my feet.

“H-hey... hey Derpy...” I muttered, sore about what had just happened between Echo and myself.

“Oh, hey, I almost forgot. I was just chatting with a mare about you and remembered I have something to give you...” she rummaged through her mail pony saddle bags and retrieved a small letter. “Ifs fo oou,” she managed while holding onto the letter with her mouth.

“Uhm... thanks...” I gave her a rather poor excuse of a thank you while I stuffed the mail into my shirt pocket, figuring I'd read it later. Derpy's nose twitched before looking past me and gasping.

“Did... did somepony... throw away those muffins?!” she nearly cried as she rushed over beside the library where a box from Tim Horseton's lay on the ground, a few muffins scattered about on the ground. 'Echo must've gotten them earlier and dropped them...' I thought silently.

“Oh... yeah, I uhh... my friend gave them to me. I must've dropped them when I tripped just now,” I lied, figuring Echo wouldn't come back for them. “If you want, you can have them. I'm not very hungry and I'd hate for them to go cold,” I told her and her face lit up, eyes gleaming with happiness.

“Really?!” she asked and I nodded, the mare pulling me into a tight hug. “Oh thankyouthankyouthankyouTHANKYOU! You're the bestest best pony ever!” she chimed before giving me a wave. “Sorry to have to go but I still have some deliveries to make.” And with that she was gone, leaving me to feel miserable with myself.

A few moments passed as I just stood there, looking into the sky despite Derpy no longer being in sight. The door to the library opened and Twilight stepped out, our daughter cradled at her side while she levitated a few travel bags alongside her.

Trotting up to me, she gave me a worried look. “Something wrong?” she asked but I shook my head as I came back to reality.

“Wuh-huh? Oh... no, uhh, no-no, nothing. Just lost in my thoughts... leaving so soon?” I asked and she just giggled as she pressed a kiss to my cheek.

“Come on, we've been over this already. I have to catch the train to Canterlot to see me parents. It'll be leaving shortly and I don't want to miss it. I'll be back in a few days and you won't even know I was gone.” We embraced in one last kiss before she took off towards the station, leaving me with myself...

“Hey Buck, what's eatin yah?” Lassie asked, jumping me out of my thoughts, yet again, in a startle. “Jeez... sounds serious,” she replied, myself not having to say a word as she read me like a book.

“Ugh... Lassie, it's... I've done a lot of bad things, you know,” I said, Lassie nodding as we both looked out to the expanse of Ponyville, still bustling as the day was nearing noon hour.

“Well... I mean, you didn't exactly freeze an entire city with the threat that Equestria was next or... try to encase the entire planet in eternal darkness or... terrorize a crystal empire or... take over Ponyville and rape your sister or anything like that,” the last mention really hit home hard. 'Tristan...'

“Yeah... but do I really deserve this cozy life after what I've done... I mean, I've even hurt my own friends,” I told her and she rolled her eyes.

“Well... I mean, you can always reconcile with them, right?” she offered, myself licking my lips in thought. Echo would never listen to me again, not after that... Applejack I'd just have to give time to. Rarity was... well, she was quick and easy to forgive me. Rainbow Dash never really resented me. Pinkie actually wanted to throw a party when I came back. Fluttershy was so timid I don't even know if she really got involved in the matter...

I didn't have that many friends come to think of it. Only acquaintances. There was however...

“Hey Lassie, wanna come with me?” I asked and she looked to me with a charming expression.

“I would love to cum with you,” she answered lewdly, making me chuckle. “Where we headed?” she asked, tossing aside her lewdness for a moment as I took her paw with one hand. I felt a soft tingling throughout my entire body, as she no doubt felt as well, and our bodies quickly faded in the blink of an eye...

Just as quickly as we disappeared, we reappeared in a new location, Lassie gasping for air. “Glorious Luna... when you asked me if I'd like to cum with you, that was not what I had in mind...” she laughed, coughing slightly before taking in the barren expanse of desert. “Jeez... uhm... romantic choice of scenery,” she quipped as she looked in the opposite direction I was walking. Giving a whistle and catching her attention, she looked my way. “Oh hey, the garage...” she trailed off as she scurried up beside me.

I felt a little tired after that. When I was younger I could cast magic, how I don't know, far easier and with much less fatigue. But now, just teleporting once seemed to have me drained...

Entering the garage, we both looked around. “Hello?” I called out and was met by a gruff response.

“What do you want?” Flam asked as he wheeled forwards in his wheelchair.

“I just came tah... to see you guys,” I said, seeing Flim sitting in the corner whom was giving me a rather scornful look.

“Oh... really? Just come to... maybe, admire your handy work?” he asked, slowly coming to a stop in front of me. “Maybe poke fun at how I can't run away?!” he began to yell. “Or... or maybe you want to paralyze my brother too, and make a joke about building a garden of vegetables!” he screamed so hard his face was nearly shaking, veins bulging from his head.

Flam huffed at me. “And you can forget about us fixing Juggernaut or the Gran Torino. They're toast! We don't have the materials to put them back together again! And don't even get me started on the warehouse!” he yelled at me. I shook my head.

“It's not why I'm here,” I told him and he just laughed in my face.

“Spare us, we're not afraid of death anymore. You've pretty much ruined our lives, ruined everything... we-have-nothing anymore. NOTHING! Look! Look at this place! After that court trial, our contracts pretty much bailed. Nopony wanted anything to do with us. We barely have enough to get by anymore!” he yelled at me, Lassie taking a cautious step back.

“I'm sorry,” I answered and the two just laughed.

“Oh really?! You're sorry... I didn't think you had to be sorry. I thought we were at fault. That's why you crippled me, right?!” Flam snapped.

“Flam... Flim... from the bottom of my heart, however dark and fucked up it may be, I'm sorry,” I told them as I went to rest a hand on Flam's shoulder, whom quickly swatted away my outreach to him.

“I don't want your apologies! I don't want your pity... I don't want anything to do with you!” he screamed. I looked down and nodded.

“Okay... but will you at least accept an old man's apology?” I asked. “Not so that I can feel better about myself, but just so that...” I slowly rested my hand on his shoulder and Flam scoffed.

“Fine! I accept your apology and I forgive you! Now get out and never come back!” he screamed at me. My hand became coated in a dark blue aura and Flam's eyes went wide. “W-what do you think y-you're doing!” he screamed just as most of his body was coated in the same magical blue aura.

My eyes closed and time seemed to stop for just a moment before I felt a spine shattering pain in my back that dropped me to the floor, Flam quickly wheeling himself back but in his haste, tipped his wheelchair.

“I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT WAS SOME KIND OF TRAP!” Flam screamed as he scampered to all fours. “Get out! GET OUT NOW!” He yelled at the top of his lungs, Flim jumping forwards.

“BROTHER!” he called out in joy, his happy tone catching Flam off guard. “Look! You can walk!” Flim clapped in joy, Flam quickly taking notice he had stood right up, no longer paralyzed from the grueling spinal injury Derreck had dealt him.

“I CAN WALK!” Flam rejoiced as the two began to dance around and sing joyfully. “Eva... Evan?” Flam called out, but I was no longer in the garage. He rushed out and took a look around but noticed I was nowhere to be seen. “He... he's gone...” Flam muttered to himself before slowly walking back inside, thinking to himself.

Lassie and I began to sneak away, both of us inside a very large pink box. “Was this really necessary?” Lassie asked and I nodded.

“They'll either come around or continue to resent me. Either way... ugh...” I groaned in slight back pain. My healing factor had allowed my to recover from the injury but at a much slower rate than when I had been younger.

After just a few moments of shuffling along in the box, we tossed it aside and began to traverse through the heated desert. “Can't you just teleport us back home? I mean... I know it feels like a punt in the cunt, but it sure as shit beets the heat,” she asked but I shook my head.

“I'm a little exhausted... don't worry, we'll be home before you know it. Maybe we'll have a barbecue out back. Cook up some corn on the cob, maybe some potatoes and mushrooms?” I asked patting her on the head as we walked through the empty desert...

* * *

I leaned back in the lawn chair, the sweet aroma of friend potatoes filling my nose. Pulling out a pen, I scribbled some things down into a booklet, Lassie looking over. "You write?" she asked but I shook my head.

"Twilight asked me to write everything down in a journal, so I didn't forget. That way, someday, we'll read it and go over all the hell we... mostly she, put up with," I told her, letting out a soft exhale as I listened to the conversations happening around me, minding that I should be watching my language. The Cutie Mark Crusaders were here, Spike... and Lassie, whom was working the barbecue. I set the small booklet aside and changed it for a whiskey bottle with an apple stamp on it

I tipped back a glass of potent whiskey that Big Mac had given me some time ago, Applebloom giving me a look. “Hey... ain't that the same stuff muh big brother makes?” she asked, noting the bottle I was drinking it out of.

“Yeah... reckon it is,” I mused with a faint smile. “He makes some pretty good cider,” I said, a bubbly burp leaving my mouth directly after I said it.

“Can ah have some? Big brother never lets me have any, says ah'm too young still,” she asked in a very polite way, the others all looking to me and asking for some too.

“Mmm... best not,” I said, figuring it best not to give younglings alcohol, which would only give Applejack even more reasons to resent me would she ever find out.

“Awww, why not?” Applebloom pouted, myself shrugging as I sighed.

“Uhh... tell yah what, when you get older, I'll let you have some, alright?” I offered, the young filly, along with the other two, giving me a frown.

“That's what Rainbow Dash always says as well,” Scootaloo muttered, a chuckle escaping my mouth just as Lassie looked over her shoulder.

“Thought you didn't drink, there Straight Edge,” she commented, making me shake my head.

“I don't,” I replied back, Lassie snickering while the others looked to me and Spike speaking all their minds.

“So... then why drink?” he asked, myself swallowing as I thought about Echo. I had tried so hard my whole life to prove myself to my mother and never had a father... my whole life all I wanted was a parent who loved me... and how I now resented who my real mother was yet... here I was, in a way, pushing away a mare I had gotten pregnant because...

“Figure I better try a few bad habits before my kid grows up. Make sure they don't end up bad,” I answered bitterly, hating myself. As I sat there, I swished my drink around a little before taking another generous sip and setting it aside. “Jeez Lassie, how long does it take to fry up some potatoes and chard?” I asked in a teasingly grumpy voice.

“About as long as it took you to realize Twilight wasn't your mother, dingus,” she commented back, getting a chuckle from everyone, including myself. As I sat there, I heard a vivid giggle which got my attention. I looked over to see Sweetie Belle blushing heavily as she laughed in a very feminine way about something Spike had said.

“You know Spike...” I grunted, catching his attention. “You've got a beautiful, wonderful, cute little filly just your age... pretty much gushing over you. Now... if you don't hurry up and ask her out on a date, I'm going to,” I told him, the two of them giggling as Spike took Sweetie Belle's hoof in his claw.

“Too late,” he said with a smile, myself perking a brow as Sweetie Belle told me the rest.

“Yeah. He asked me to go with him to a festival out in Manehatten. Well, we're all going, but he asked me specifically to go with him. We're also going to meet up with Babs Seed there,” she informed me, myself perking a brow.

“Jeez... Manehatten'ssh a far wayss a way,” I told them, feeling the alcohol slurring my speech a little.

Spike nodded as he spoke. “Yeah, I know. We're catching the train tomorrow,” he told me, myself frowning.

“Well damn. A train isn't a very romantic way to go on your first date. All those other ponies and such,” I told him, Spike shrugging.

“Well... I didn't really have enough money for anything else and I didn't want to ask anypony else for the money to go, you know?” he asked and I just laughed as I cursed under my breath.

“Shit... you shoulda just told me. You could go in Cadance,” I told him, Spike shrugging it off.

“Nah, it's all right. I wouldn't ask you to drive us all the way there and back,” he told me but I quickly waved it off.

“No you twit. I meant you drive. Take your fillyfriend there on a nice countryside drive to Manehatten. Go see a show together,” I told him, Spike looking to me with a shocked expression.

“In Cadance?” he asked in disbelief.

“Yeah. I mean gosh, I know it's not a Cadillac or royal carriage or anything like that but it's a lot nicer than-” he cut me short.

“You'd let me drive Cadance, all the way to Manehatten, without you?” he asked and I just shrugged like it was no big deal. “Cadance, the truck you hardly ever let anypony else drive?!” he stammered out and I just swished around my booze a little bit more before speaking.

“Yeah...” I paused as I turned my head slightly to look at my beautiful red truck, the one I did hardly let anypony else ever drive. “I'd let you drive Cadance...”

* * *

A pair of soft, rather wet, lips woke me up, pressed against my own. I jittered awake, shaking my head in wonder of what was happening.

The kids had all left an hour or two ago, myself making sure I went over a few things with Spike, getting extra fuel for the road from Flim and Flam, giving them extra money and... Flim and Flam may still hate me, but I'm not sure they'd hate the kids.

“BWAH! WHAT?!” I gasped, Lassie cackling as she sat back down.

“Well, I would've woken you up with a blowjob. I hear stallions like that, but I'm not sure you'd respond well to that. Even though you do have a raging erection,” she laughed as I squirmed in my chair to hide the boner that had arisen during my drunken nap.

“Muh... yeah...” I let out a sigh. “Goddess alive, I hope I become a good father,” I mumbled to myself, Lassie smiling.

“Hey, if it's any consonance, I'd be honored if you were the father of my children,” she quipped, making me groan.

“Ugh... that's a disturbing thought... no offense,” I told her, making her laugh.

“It's all good. Twenty percent of the readers chose parental incest over me,” she informed, myself perking a brow.

“What?” I asked, wondering what the hell she was talking about.

“N-nothing, don't worry about it,” she laughed. “I won't take it to heart.”

I leaned back in my seat and looked to Lassie. “Can I tell you something... really serious?” I asked, Lassie nodding as she mowed down some fries.

“Yeah... oh hey, I woke you up cause the fries are getting cold,” she told me, myself nodding as I looked to her.

“Derreck... I mean, I guess me but under a-” she cut me short.

“Just call him Derreck. I understand what went on with you,” she told me casually.

“He got a mare knocked up during one of our adventures. I'm not sure whether or not it was intentional but... she came to see me today,” I told her, Lassie looking to me with huge eyes.

“WOAH! REA... I mean, go on,” she urged me to continue.

“I... she thought that there was some really special connection between her and me... err, Derreck, and I dunno whether or not she thought we'd be together and raise a happy family or-” Lassie cut me short.

“So what happened?” she interrupted.

“I... I kinda froze. I told her it was Derreck and that I... well, that he's dead and I just... I have my own family, you know?” I asked, Lassie's face going pale as she heard my words.

“Woah dude... that's harsh,” she told me and I nodded.

“Was I wrong? I mean... after what I've been through, to do that to a-” she cut me short.

“Dude, listen. I'm not real good with this shit. I mean, I forced you and Twilight into a super unhealthy relationship that just barely squeezed by. What happened was because of Derreck. That won't make you like your mother. You're not gonna be berating this child but, I guess you won't be there to do it so... I mean, you didn't want it and didn't have any input on it happening so you shouldn't be held accountable and... like I said, I'm not an expert so I don't know what to tell you... is that why you're drinking tonight?” she asked and I nodded in return. There was a long pause before she spoke.

“Man... that's really heavy... so anything else aside from Flim and Flam happen today?” she asked and I just shook my head.

“No... oh wait... yeah, I got some mail from Derpy...” I said as I pulled the envelope from my shirt pocket. Opening it up, my eyes quickly went wide as I looked upon a photo. “Oh shit..."

“What? WHAT?!” Lassie asked as she rushed over, hunching over my shoulder as we both looked over the photo. A mare was tied up, duct tape over her mouth. Her blue eyes were wide and terrified. The mare was Daring...

Author's Note

Buddum-tssh. I know I wrote that Celestia would be in this chapter but it's just turning out to be wayyyyy longer than I expected so I'm gonna crack it into like two chapters. Promise to have it out by this weekend, unless some act of god makes it not happen.
Oh yeah, and statistics show that %20 more people chose Parental Incest over sex with Lassie in that one story for Mother's day, so there's that. Be easy everyone... err, no...
Cheers eh!
(That's better)

Chapter 78

'Out to the country...'

“Are you sure about this?!” Lassie whispered to me as we each picked up a small handful of pebbles.

“Positive, she's the only one who'll give it to me straight,” I replied as I stood up, Lassie scoffing.

“More like the only one who'll tell you not to go. Come on, be honest, you know what she's gonna say,” Lassie told me, making me shrug in return. “Come on, are you really going to let Daring Do's life hinge on HER opinion!” Lassie scolded me.

“I've tried to leave this life behind. I've tried to convince Daring to leave it behind. I at least tried to retire, she just insulted me about the thought of it. We'll see what she says about it because, unlike anypony else, she'll at least give me a straight answer,” I told her, Lassie rolling her eyes.

“How about somepony you don't know?” she offered, myself shaking my head.

“Daring needs to stay a fictional character in the public eye,” I told Lassie whom just scoffed at my excuse.

“So then why ask her of all ponies?” she asked, pointing to the bedroom window. I just shrugged as I cocked my arm back, ready to throw.

“Because she is the only one who will seriously consider both options,” I answered as I tossed the pebble at Applejack's bedroom window, which missed and bounced off the roof. For a few moments, Lassie and I tossed pebbles, most of which missed horribly.

Finally, Lassie pecked one off the window. “Ha! And the crowd goes wild,” Lassie whispered, not wanting to wake everypony in the house with her wild cheer. After a few more pebbles knocked against her window, it slid open, the farmer pony taking a look out as she rubbed her eyes.

“Huh, who...” she trailed off as she spotted us, illuminated in the bright moonlight down below. “What in tarnation are you doing here?!” she growled at us, Lassie quickly pitching up.

“Hey, pssssh! Sssh, come down here! Don't wake the whole bloody neighborhood!” she hissed back, Applejack giving us a look before huffing.

“Ah'll be down in a second,” she grumbled, shutting the window. Only a minute or so passed before the orange farmer pony stormed out the front door of the farm house and across the yard, a rather annoyed expression about her.

“This better be good!” she snapped at me. Despite everything, she still resented me for what I, or Derreck, had done... but I guess I couldn't blame her. I bit my lip and stayed silent, pondering how I should approach her about it. Lassie however, was quick to pipe up.

“Of course it is, you nimwit. We wouldn't have come to see you at this hour if it wasn't,” she answered, Applejack raising a brow to Lassie's tone.

“Well. Then what's this big emergency?” she asked, a little agitated we had woken her at this hour. Lassie nudged me, motioning with her head.

“Go on, show her. I'm not solving all of your problems for you,” she quipped, making me sigh as I reached into my shirt pocket but before I revealed the photo, I looked to Applejack.

“Applejack, just know that I haven't considered anything just yet. I'm looking for advice,” I told her, the farmer's brow raising even more. “And you have to Pinkie Promise not to tell a single living soul,” I told her, Applejack shaking her head.

“Not until ah figure out what yer up tah,” she told me with a squinty eyed look.

“We're not up to anything! We're getting thrown into something,” Lassie shot back, the farmer pony looking to her.

“Oh ah get it. Yer goin on another crazy adventure tah kill ponies and yah just need a good excuse tah do it, right?” she snapped at us, Lassie getting steamed at the farmer's tone.

“Just show her the damn photo already for Celestia's sake!” Lassie growled as she scrunched her nose. “Then maybe she'll understand.” I fished out the photo and handed it over to Applejack who rose a confused brow.

“Oh... okay, so what the hay is this an' what's it supposed tah mean?” she asked and I sighed.

“Applejack, you have to listen to what I'm about to say and believe me for this to make sense, okay?” I asked, the mare giving me a stern look but letting me speak. “Okay, a long-long time ago I went on an errand for Flim and Flam to get some kinda... thingy. But their directions sucked and their map wasn't very helpful. I ended up in Ghastly Gorge where I met a mare... her name is Daring Do-” Applejack cut me short.

“WHAT?! Yah mean the mare from Dash's adventure books? She ain't a real mare-” I cut her short.

“Applejack, like I said, you just have to listen to me before you can understand,” I ordered, the mare sighing and reluctantly began listening again.

“Okay... so like I said... I met Daring Do and we found Peg Leg's gold... there's a longer story to that, one involving her locking me up and us fighting and blowing up the cave but that's besides the point. After that, we both got paid from the museum then went our separate ways. She came back to me a while later and convinced me to climb Mount Tia with her... you remember that. It wasn't actually a terminally ill mare. I lied about that to cover up Daring's existance. And now, just recently, she came back wanting me to go find some book of fantasy or something... and I told her no, that I was retired,” I replied, Applejack giving me a serious look. “I tried convincing her to retire as well, to get out while she was ahead... but she just mocked me as I walked away, saying she'd do it herself... and just today I got this in the mail,” I told her, Applejack stifling a laugh.

“Alright... supposin' ah do believe all this... what's goin' on?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“I don't rightly know. The picture never came with a letter, or a ransom note or anything. I suppose those Daring Do stories are based on more real life events than anypony realizes. I'm guessing... whoever the villains are in the story, probably captured her,” I offered my reasoning behind it, which only made Applejack laugh.

“Oh... oh, ah understand alright. So yah don't know what's going on but yah want muh consent tah go on some crazy adventure an' kill more ponies so that when Twilight gets back from her parents' house and finds out yah broke yet another promise, yah can tell her that AH gave yah permission tah do it. Ah see what yer tryin'-” Lassie cut her short.

“We're not trying to do anything! We figured you off all ponies would give it to us straight.” She stomped her paw down. “And you're doing a pretty good job of it so far,” she snarled out, Applejack looking to us with a slightly stunned expression.

“Give it tah yah straight, how?” she asked in curious wonder. I picked up to answer her question.

“Should I try to rescue her?” I asked in the most blunt of ways. “I'm not going to hurt ponies, I'm not going for the sake of an exhilarating thrill. I'd be going to save a... friend. But I'd be breaking my promise. So, we came to you to ask... what's the right thing to do?” I asked, Applejack scoffing.

“Well, if yah really need tah ask, then yah'll ready making a mistake. Yah made a promise tah Twilight!” she snapped and I nodded.

“That's all I wanted to hear,” I said as I turned around to head back to the library, Lassie following close behind. Before we even got a few steps away, Applejack was calling over to us.

“Hey, take yer photo,” she called out, holding the photo for us to take but I merely shook my head.

“I won't need it,” I replied as I continued to walk away. Not even ten seconds had passed by and Applejack scurried in front of us.

“W-wait... hold on... what'll happen tah this mare if somepony don't save her?” she asked and I just shrugged.

“I don't know. Like I said, we didn't get a ransom note or anything, just the photo. I don't know what they wanted with me or even who sent the photo. They might hold her a bit longer and try to get something from me, or maybe try to ransom somepony else... or they might just kill her, I don't know... but it's not my problem anymore,” I said as I moved past her.

“She could be in serious trouble though,” Applejack shouted at me and I just shrugged as I twirled around, walking backwards as I looked to her.

“You said it yourself AJ. I shouldn't have even had to think about it. I have a promise for Twilight I need to keep,” I repeated her own words, Applejack biting her lower lip. The mare ran up and stopped me in place, a conflicted look on her face.

“Don't yah even try tah put this on me! Ah... ah... UGH! Yah really are a snake in the grass! This ain't even fair!” she yelled at me, now just as conflicted with the problem as I was.

“Nothing in life is fair AJ... we are just forced to make the decisions,” I told her, her face twisting a bit into a frown.

“Don't call me AJ. Muh friend's are the only ones that get to call me that,” she snapped, making me sigh.

“Fine... Applejack... I'm going home, because I have a promise to keep to-” she cut me short.

“Oh no yah don't. Yer not leaving this on me!” she ordered and I rose a brow.

“I'm not leaving this on you. I just asked your opinion on what I should do. You don't have to get involved,” I answered, Applejack grumbling to herself.

“Oh yes, yah did leave it on me... yer... yer playin' games an' ah don't like it... GUR! Ah can't believe ah let myself get roped inta this...” she growled before going silent for a moment's time. “Like yah said...” she bit her lip before whispering under her breath. “Ah can't believe ah'm about tah... we ain't goin' tah kill ponies, right? So, where was she headed?” Applejack asked.

There was a long pause in which I seriously considered it. Applejack was the most likely of all ponies to tell me to keep my promise... and here she was, in a way, volunteering to go. “I don't kno-” I cut myself off before I could finish. I did know where she had went. She had told me part of her plan...

* * *

A soft, gentle warmth trickled against the side of my head... slowly trailing my cheek and then to my neck. I stirred in my seat before finally cracking my eye. Morning time had finally come around, and our train was somewhere in a vast emptiness of farmer fields.

Shaking off my morning disorientation, along with drowse from slight lack of sleep, I let out a yawn and sat up, letting out a slight, muffled groan. With a cluck of my tongue, I looked around the cabin car. There were a few other ponies, here and there, but not many.

“Mmm... okay...” I muttered as I stood up and moseyed my way through train car after train car, eventually reaching the caboose. Leaning again the back railing of the final car, I went over my thoughts.

This was crazy. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I should've stayed home... 'should've'. But here I was, breaking my promise to Twilight yet again because I had considered the alternative... but hey, at least this time Applejack of all ponies was on my side... kind of. She still firmly believed that I had pressured her into this, but irregardless, lucky for Lassie and I she decided on coming with.

Having let Spike and the others take my truck, we were only left with one option to get to Appleloosa... the train. On top of that, Applejack had noted that her good cousin Braeburn would probably know what cave Daring had mentioned and that finding her would be easier than first thought...

And now here I was... early morning, on my way to Appleloosa to rescue some damn pegasus that I hardly even liked... for fuc...

I shook my head as I stood up, looking to my F&F watch only to realize I had spent over an hour leaning against the back railing just pondering my thoughts. Turning around, I headed back to our train car, and took a seat beside Applejack, whom was sitting across from Lassie.

My dog friend sat happily reading a book... a documentation book about wildlife... while she sucked earnestly on a lollipop. “Nature books?” I asked curiously, breaking Lassie's trans like state.

“Wha... huh? Oh... uhh, ha-ha no. The new Playcolt limited magazine,” she replied, turning the book my way and revealing a smut magazine tucked into the actual book. I groaned with a slight chuckle whilst Applejack let out a displeasured 'Tch' which caught Lassie's attention.

“You know... I think I might just know why you've been so stuck up lately Applejack,” she quipped, catching a narrow glare from the farmer pony. “I mean, jeez, ain't no shame in it. We all like to rub one off every now and then,” she chuckled heartily, the apple farmer just rolling her eyes in slight disgust.

“Ah can't believe ah got roped inta this,” she complained, Lassie laughing.

“You didn't. Seriously. I suggested going to see literally any another pony besides you. Somepony who wouldn't even have considered it and just said yes cause it's the right thing to do. I seriously don't know why you two even had to think about it. Yeah, she might be a... real wanker but hey, she's a living pony and nopony deserves to be tied up like that... under normal circumstances, you know?” she asked us rhetorically. “I thought for sure when Evan suggested we ask you, he was just trying to take the easy way out because you'd definitely say no, then he could feel better about himself leaving her to... at the mercy of her captors I suppose,” she mentioned before going to rummage through a rather large duffle bag she had resting on the other half of her seat.

Applejack took a finer look at the bag. “Say... what's in the bag? Aint no weapons ah hope. Thought yah said yah wasn't plannin' on hurtin no pony,” she interrogated, Lassie laughing.

“Oh goddess no...” she trailed off as she pulled out an oddly shaped dildo. “Mostly dildos and vibrators. Oh, and some butt plugs... a set of anal beads,” she mentioned, making Applejack and myself groan as we got out of our seats to leave, myself going to get some breakfast. “Hey... what did I say?” she asked as we both walked away. “Well, you asked,” she called out. “A girl always cums prepared, right? Just ask Rarity!”

* * *

The train came to a slow stop at the Appleloosa train station, the conductor calling out various things, letting us know we had reached our stop and such. Hefting up our travel bags, of which Lassie's was the largest, we made our way off the train and into the small town. Looking around, vivid memories came back to me of my time spent here with Applejack, back when we were friends and when I'd help her and her family out on various occasions.

It was hot out, making me regret having worn my old duster coat. The town was slow moving, as usual, with a tumbleweed bouncing gently across the town's main road.

“Okay... what now?” I asked, taking a look around but then following a silent Applejack, whom began to trot through town, with Lassie and myself in tow. The town was nice and made me wish I had visited it more often in my youth. It had a nostalgic feel to it... real old style western vibe which really made me feel at peace. The ponies around town seemed simple and rather easy going, not so fast paced and uppity like in Manehatten or Canterlot.

Stumbling around as I followed Applejack, I enjoyed the sights, taking it all in. We may be on a rescue mission, but that didn't mean I couldn't enjoy what there was to see. “Well HOWDY cousin Applejack!” shouted an ecstatically happy and all too familiar voice. Looking over, Lassie and I watched as a light gold colored stallion rushed over and took Applejack into a big hug. “Well heck cousin, why didn't yah tell me yah was headin' around these parts? I woulda taken a day er two off tah-” Applejack quickly cut him short.

“Ain't here on leisure, Brae. Serious problem, but yah was just the pony we was lookin' fer,” she told him, Braeburn going silent for a moment before looking over to us.

“Oh hey, Mr. Burdick! And... oh, you must be Lassie. Applejack says you're the dog that can talk!” he gave us a friendly wave as Lassie sighed with a smile.

“The talking dog...” she shook her head before Braeburn picked up again.

“Well shoot, yah said there was a serious problem and yah'll was looking fer me?... ah mean, ah'd love tah offer muh help but what kinda problem yah'll need me fer? Ah ain't real good at-” Brae asked, Applejack quickly cutting him off to explain things as I took a look around us.

Jeez, usually caves were part of mountains and stuff but the surrounding area mostly just looked like flat plains and of couple of hills... but I suppose this cave could be part of a gorge or something too so-

“Well holy hay Applejack! We better go tell the sheriff right away!” Braeburn broke my thoughts as he turned to gallop away. “C'mon, this way!” he told us as he began galloping away, Applejack and Lassie in quick pursuit and leaving me dragging behind. Gosh... I was so old... and, well, I wasn't actually fat but I couldn't run all that far without really feeling it in my lungs. The others made it to the Sheriff's office a full minute ahead of me, already in conversation about the kidnapping.

I burst through the door, panting heavily as though I was on my last few breaths. “Jeez, you feeling alright?” Lassie asked in a slight bit of worry.

“I am too old for this,” I punned.

Sheriff Silver Star leaned back in his chair. “Well... ah don't reckon ah know of any caves around these parts,” he mentioned as he rubbed his chin. “Ah'd love tah help but we need more tah run on than just saying some mare was foalnapped. Ah can throw together a posse to go look but without even a picture of the mare or a place to start looking...” he trailed off as I caught my breath.

“She... said... a cave... some kinda book... a relic or... an artifact,” I panted, the sheriff perking a brow.

“An artifact you say? Hmm... ah reckon none of the townsfolk know much about that, but ah'd be willin' tah bet a days wages that the buffalo might. They been around these parts longer than any of us an' they'd probably know about that cave to... reckonin' yah'll figure out where this place is... ah'll throw together a posse tah come looking, and we'll apprehend these would-be foalnappers,” he said in a just tone. “Until then, ah'll have a real hard time getting law bringers together with what little information we have. Sorry ah can't be of any more service,” he apologized, but we all just nodded.

“Thank yah Sheriff,” Braeburn gave him our thanks. “It's more than enough,” he assured the older sheriff before turning to us. “C'mon yah'll, ah know a shortcut tah the buffalo village!” he told us in haste, rushing out the door and leaving me to groan.

“Ughhhh... more running...” I dipped my head...

* * *

Hours had passed and nightfall was upon us as we entered the small native village, myself wheezing heavily. I really was old... and probably out of shape. Derreck... he kept himself better fit than I did... jeez, maybe he really was better than me at-

“Hello, brother Braeburn,” came a very deep and husky voice as a buffalo came up and embraced the young stallion in a very formal hug. “It is so good to see you-” he was cut off by the rather frantic stallion.

“It's so good to see you too Rainy Storm, but ah'm afraid we're not here fer friendly reunions. A friend of ours had been foalnapped!” he exclaimed, the buffalo's eyes going wide.

“Foalnapped?! Then why come here?” he asked curiously.

“Well... yah see, we don't know where she is but we know she's somewhere in the area an' that it's got somethin' tah do with a cave and an artifact but... well, none of us back in town know about any cav-” he was cut off as the buffalo stuck his hoof into Braeburn's mouth.

“Sssh! Come, we must speak to the great elder, and the chief should know as well...” he let out a whistle and a younger buffalo quickly came over. “Little Strongheart, quickly. Get the chief, and tell him to meet us at the great elder's,” he ordered, the young buffalo quickly running off into the village. Rainy Storm began to lead us through the tribe's village, speaking in whisper.

“The cave... there is only one. And it is forbidden,” he told us, my eyes going wide. That certainly sounded like something Daring was into... forbidden caves. “The artifact you speak of... I will not say more, you must speak with the elder and the chief.” He kept quiet after that, leading us to a somewhat larger tent than the others, holding the entrance flap open for us.

Lassie went first, followed by Braeburn, Applejack and finally myself. As we entered, the tent flap was closed behind us and we were greeted by the sight of a very elderly buffalo sitting on his haunches, perfectly still and surrounded by lit candles that illuminated the tent.

“Come... sit...” his lips didn't move but we heard him clear as day. Though Applejack, Braeburn and myself were slightly hesitant about taking our seat, Lassie plopped herself down quickly and happily, panting slightly with a slight smile on her face, tongue hanging out.

The old buffalo rose a smoke pipe to his lips and took a generous inhale, speaking to us despite having a pipe in his mouth and seemingly talking without any hindrance. “So... it has come to be,” he said, myself picking up.

“What has?” I asked, a gust of wind blowing throughout the tent and nearly putting out the candles, sending a shiver down all of our backs.

“Sssh!” the elder hissed. “Be silent in this time of revelations... for it has been foretold in my visions... the two apple farmers, the outcast... and the talking dog,” he told us, lowering the pipe from his mouth and exhaling several smoke rings. Suddenly, all the candles went out and we were encased in darkness.

In the very far out distance, a single, glimmering light began to shimmer... and then another... and another... soon, we were surrounded by... stars?!

“You live your own life, a chooser of your own destiny... but there are events of your life that have been foretold in the catacombs of time... events that cannot be avoided, but one's that you will always fight with the fullest of your heart...” the elder's voice spoke as some of the stars began to move, replicating ponies fighting, ponies loving each other and all sorts of events that weren't very specific but were depictive enough to know what was happening.

I noticed Applejack standing next to me, but Braeburn and Lassie were absent. “Your honesty defines who you are, strengthening the bond you share with your friends. With it, nopony can break who you are,” he said.

Wait... so was he talking to me or to-

“Your lewdness and sexual drive makes those around you uncomfortable. However, your unwavering loyalty and compassion keeps you close to the hearts of those you love and cherish...” It was that moment I noticed Lassie was here too but... why hadn't I noticed her earl-

“You have a soft heart, caring for those closest to you. You'd give everything for those you care about, to keep them safe from danger and harm...” I noticed that now even Braeburn was here. I went to scratch my head but noticed I didn't have a hand... or even a body! I was just... I couldn't even speak!

“You all have so much to learn... and so much to live. Embrace all of life's little things, for they are the biggest gifts of all,” he told us...

My foot kicked and I awoke on the floor of the tent... my head felt a little fuzzy and-

“Woah... that was a wild trip,” Lassie groaned groggily as the four of us slowly sat up, the tent flap opening and a large buffalo entering. We all sat in silence as, whom I presumed to be, the chief walked across the tent and sat beside the elder.

“Rainy Storm... says your friend has been foalnapped,” he said in a monotone voice. I went to speak but he continued to speak before the words could leave my mouth. “He also says... she has plundered into the holy burial grounds of our great ancestors, looking for an artifact. No doubt grave robbing and disrespecting the final resting places of those no longer with us. I fear she may have angered the spirits there and they are the ones that have taken your friend,” he said, Lassie speaking up.

“Okay, but then why would they have taken a photo and sent it to us?” she asked, Braeburn quickly piping up.

“Wait, there was a photo? Why didn't yah'll show that tah Sheriff Silverstar?! That woulda-” he was cut off by Lassie as she huffed out a reply.

“We didn't keep the photo, alright? We just kinda panicked and left it behind and we've been winging it since,” she answered, the elder shushing us as he blew another few smoke rings.

“We do not know who has taken your friend, or why... but if it is the spirits, you must appease their anger to save your friend. Otherwise, her spirit will be damned to eternal torment,” he said.

“Then what are we waiting for?” I went to stand up but collapsed to the floor, my whole body feeling numb. The elder shook his head.

“If you were to go there now, like you are, you would suffer the same fate as your friend. Your body must be cleansed of all evils and purged before you may enter the sacred grounds... even then, you may still enrage the spirits as your friend has already tainted their sacred resting places...”

The chief looked to us. “When you awake, you'll be near the holy grounds and will be accompanied by our greatest tracker. He will guide you and help find your friend. My best wishes,” he told us just as everything started to fade away into a messy blur of vibrant colors...

I felt myself gagging on water, being dragged down stream with several bullet wounds in my body. Suddenly, a pair of hands grabbed me, dragging me from the current. I coughed and continued to spit up water as the figure rescued me from the river. I groaned as I tried to focus my vision but could hardly manage. The man began to wrap my wounds with medical bandage, along with extracting several bullets that were still lodged in my body...

I hung up the phone, feeling stunned, shocked... lost. They had Derpy. The man patted my shoulder with a smile, assuring me everything was going to turn out alright and that I had nothing to worry about as he picked the phone back up...

The thugs surrounded us on the cliff side of the mountain. This was it... we were done. A mighty roar was unleashed as a figure lunged straight into the middle of the group, slashing at them with razor sharp claws. The thugs all screamed as Daring and I were left stunned by the occurrence. The man turned to me, his grizzled face forming a smile as he gave me a thumbs up...

Something blasted the back of my head and I felt my body drop. Even though I was unconscious, I could see myself... like a spirit from above. The mare that had blasted me whispered something to my body, then turned to keep guard. Within seconds however, my body rose back up, now sporting a different appearance as it snarled wildly like a maddened beast. Lunging into the mare, I... no, he grabbed her, claws extended as he went to impale the mare for crossing me like that...

I felt a painful strike hammer me down, my body bouncing across the ground a few times before coming to a painful stop. A dark cloaked figure slowly approached, a ghastly fume emitting from beneath his robes. I let out a pained groan as I tried to get up, to fight this figure but couldn't find the strength to do so.

The figure lifted a sickly scythe above its head, readying itself to finish me off. I winced as I clenched my eyes shut. There was a deafening roar, followed by a petrified scream of terror. Opening my eyes, I watched as a burly man tackled Death to the ground, punching it several times before drawing out a wicked handcannon that shone in the darkness.

The gun thundered several times, each shot illuminating Death's bony face. The figure of Death went limp in the big man's hands before he dropped the body to the ground. Standing up, the man looked to me as he walked over and offered me his hand. “Do not worry, my brother. I will always protect you, and together, nothing can stop us,” Derreck told me...

I awoke with a scream, thrashing about on the ground as I regained consciousness. The others all looked to me and I noticed their tribal garb, along with the face paint they had on. “Woah... you guys look...” I trailed off and saw myself done up in a similar fashion and nearly gasped.

“Sssh,” whispered a fairly slender, compared to the others, male buffalo. “We are walking on the sacred grounds of our ancestors. Even now, we are disturbing their peace. We must be quick to save your friend. Quickly, this way,” he ordered us.

The others had all woken up before me, how long I didn't know, but they had all regained their composure better than me and I was dragging a little as we walked along through the spooky grave yard.

We all could hear spooky voices. They were distorted, and garbled but they sounded freaky. A thick fog ran across the ground, so dense I could feel the resistance against my legs as we walked along. The fog was also so thick we couldn't actually see the ground, and I ended up stumbling once or twice.

“Jeez... this place gives me the creeps,” I muttered, Lassie snickering.

“You're telling us? We've been up for the last fifteen minutes waiting for your lazy ass to wake up.” She stifled a laugh. Just before she could say anything else however, she let out a scream and was pulled to the ground with a yelp. We all stopped as her body disappeared under the smoky fog.

“Lassie!” I yelled out in panic, hearing her scream just a few feet away. Rushing over, I reached into the fog. “GRAB MY HAND!” I yelled, just as the others ran over as well. I felt her paws grab my hands and I began to pull her away from whatever had her.

“GET ME OUTTA HERE!” Lassie screamed to us just as I managed to pull her upper half out from the fog. Braeburn and Applejack came to each side of me and began to help pull Lassie from the depths.

Just as we almost had her out, something grabbed my ankles from behind and dragged me away. Giving a sharp kick, I managed a hit to the face of our aggressor. I barely even managed to roll onto my back before a creature jumped onto me. It's face was mostly comprised of rows upon rows of razor sharp teeth. It's body was slender and thin and it had a long bony muzzle. It didn't say anything but rather just chomped down on the side of my neck, shaking it's head and chewing me up something fierce.

Letting out an agonizing scream that was mixed with blood, I landed several punches into the side of the creature's head which only spurred it to ravage my neck more. Reaching across the ground for anything I could use, my hand found the handle of some kind of club.

My hand gripped the handle tight and swung the blunt club into the skull of the beast, knocking it off my body. Rolling over and on top of it, I let out a fierce battle cry and began to bash it's skull in with the old style native club. I continued to beat it for several seconds before stopping to take a good look at it. The skull had been crushed and the creature was no more...

Standing up and out of the fog, the others all looked to me in shock. “JEEZ! Evan!” Lassie cried out as she rushed over. “Oh goddess, we gotta get him outta... eww...” she groaned as she watched my neck slowly heal back together.

“I'll be fine... hey, you,” I said to the buffalo. “What the hell was that?!” I asked, the club still in my grip.

“A spirit that has not passed on. It's presence lingers here to guard this holy ground. We must hurry, for when there is one, there are always more. The cave is just this way,” the buffalo told us, leading us with the utmost of haste.

As we hurried along, Lassie pulled me closer to her. “Hey... listen, when we were all knocked out, I had this crazy dream about a blue stallion... I-I-I don't remember what his name was but... for some reason, you were... you didn't stop him and just stood there while he... and h-he... he stabbed me through the belly with his horn,” she told me and my spine shivered. “Y-you'd never... never let somepony do that to me, right? Never stand back and just let it happen?” she asked. “I know you're a pacifist now, but if it came down to it, you'd stop somepony who was going to kill me, right?” she asked, pretty shaken up about this dream of hers.

“Hey, relax. Of course I would. You just saw what happened back there, right?” I asked, Lassie nodding in response.

“Y-yeah... well, I mean, I saw you guys pulling me out but the dream... sorry, I... it just felt so real, l-like... like an epiphany or something, you know?” she asked and I nodded. The buffalo suddenly came to a stop and motioned for us to do the same.

“This is the most sacred place of all... where our ancestors left their mark before passing on to the other world...” he trailed off and pulled out a set of flint stones, striking them over a torch and bringing it to life. “Quickly, this way, we must hurry” the buffalo said as he led us along, torch illuminating the entire inside of the cave.

There were markings all over the walls, hoof prints, ancient writing... my lips mouthed out a single word. 'Wow...' I was left in utter shock. This place... was amazing. In just a few dozen yards however, we were at the end of the cave, itself only being a few dozen feet deep.

“This is the end of the cave,” he told us, my brow rising and Lassie speaking our minds for us.

“But we haven't found our friend? If she's not here, then where is she?!” Lassie whispered.

“I do not know,” the buffalo told us. “But this is the only cave in the region-” he was cut off by Braeburn.

“No!... No, it ain't... well, perhaps the only natural cave but...” he trailed off as a ghostly moan echoed throughout the cave. We all stood still for a moment before slowly turning around to be confronted by a floating entity that hovered between us and the exit.

It was the upper half of an elderly buffalo but one that was in spirit form, groaning and emitting a screeching whiny noise that sent cold shivers down my back. Our buffalo guide leapt in front of our group and began to speak in ancient tongue, a language I doubt any of us could understand. The ghost let out a loud screech that shook the tunnel but the buffalo stomped his hoof and spoke in a more determined voice.

There was a long pause before the ghost moved aside, the buffalo turning to us. “Quickly, this way. RUN!” he told us before galloping out of the cave, the rest of us following him.

Rushing out of the cave, the buffalo didn't stop and just kept running, all of us following him closely until we were finally out of the grave site. “Goddess dammit... fuck! That was creepy...” I swore, Lassie nodding as she kicked off her tribal garb.

Looking to the buffalo, Braeburn asked a question that had been on my mind earlier. “What did yah say back there? Ah didn't rightly understand none of it,” he asked, the buffalo turning to us and speaking.

“I spoke to him in our ancient tongue, the language of our ancestors. I told him that your friend had been kidnapped, and taken there. The spirit screamed back that no one had been to the holy grounds in a very long time and accused me of lying. I told him that we meant no disrespect, and that we had brought nothing with us, nor were taking anything and that we were only searching for your friend, for her safety and well being. He allowed us exit only because you are all pure of heart,” he told us. I half expected Applejack to speak up and quip something about me but she stayed silent.

“That wasn't the right cave,” Braeburn noted, Lassie laughing as she slipped on a brown leather jacket that covered the front half of her body before she heaved her travel bag over her back.

“A-durr, yah think?” she joked. I looked to Applejack and Braeburn who were slipping on their hats.

“H-hey wait... why were we dressed in this tribal garb if all our clothes were right here?!” I asked, the buffalo speaking up.

“We had to dress in the ceremonial ways before laying hoof on the holy grounds. It is the way of the spirits and defying it would only further anger them,” he told us. “It may also be one of the reasons the spirit let us leave,” he told us just as I spotted my clothes.

Kicking off the tribal uniform, which was just a rope around my waist and a piece of cloth over my groin, I slipped on my briefs and camouflage cargo pants. “Say... I don't think I got your name,” I asked just as I slipped on my under shirt, followed by the vest Braeburn had given me for my birthday last year.

"My name is Bill," he said in a very monotone voice.

“Bill eh? Huh... that's quite the peculiar name,” I mentioned, Lassie laughing.

“Pfft, what?! Come on, you of all people?” she asked, making me raise a brow. “Dude... he's a buffalo and his name is... oh screw it,” she muttered, leaving me a bit lost. I looked back to him then noticed something I hadn't before. His eyes... they were...

“Y-you're... you're blind?” I stammered, the buffalo nodding in return. “But... but you didn't even stumble,” I mentioned and he nodded again.

“I was born this way. It seems that perhaps vision is a great handicap that none of you realize. Without sight, my other senses have reached heights that some consider unnatural. I can... see, everything even in the darkest of places just by the sounds that are given off by hoofsteps. The sounds of your breathing. I may not be able to see the exact definition of your facial features, but I know you are in your older years,” he told me, making me go wide eyed.

“Glorious Luna... man, I had no idea. That's crazy...” I trailed off, Bill nodding in return before turning to Braeburn.

“You were saying about this being the wrong cave,” he mentioned, Braeburn nodding.

“Y-yeah... yeah, ah was. See, ah nearly fergot 'bout it but... well, when I was younger, muh grampa used tah tell me stories 'bout a mine 'round here, even before Appleloosa was started. When we was all sleepin', ah had a dream 'bout it... it's cold... dark an'... over just yonder, by them hills,” he said, pointing over to some hills in the distance.

“Wait,” Applejack spoke up. “How do yah know fer sure?” she asked, Braeburn just shrugging in return.

“Ah... ah just know... like... like somehow, deep down, yah know?” he asked, Lassie letting out a deep exhale.

“Well... in that case,” she mentioned as she pulled out a-

“Oh ah just knew it! Ah shoulda known yah was plannin' on killin',” Applejack shouted, myself groaning as I watched Lassie load a few cartridges into Daisy, my old lever action that her, Derpy and I had painted together.

“Ughh... Lassie,” I groaned, my dog looking to me.

“What, I brought your handgun as well,” she told me, Applejack storming away a few paces.

“Of course, OF COURSE! Ah knew yah'll hadn't changed and was just lookin' fer an excuse tah kill-” Lassie cut the angered farmer off.

“Hakuna your tatas Applejack. I brought them with me just in case. Evan had no idea I brought them with me. Besides... Evan, you should be on my side. When haven't we gone on an adventure and needed a gun?” she asked, myself shaking my head.

“L-Lassie... I... ugh... we're not supposed to even be out here... shit, Applejack I-” the mare cut me off.

“Applejack me nuthin! Don't yah even dare try an' pull a quick one on me. Ah guarantee yah knew about them killin' things she had and just pretended not tah. Yah'll never change,” she scolded us, myself giving a disapproving look to Lassie who just shrugged.

“WHAT?! Fine, you know what, when shit gets hairy, I won't use the gun and when you're all getting your asses kicked I'll say 'Told yah so',” she mentioned before slinging the lever action rifle over her shoulder, just beside the travel bag... something was telling me it wasn't just anal beads and dildos in there...

Hours past and we arrived to an old mining camp. It was small... and terribly run down. The only thing left were some dilapidated tent frames and some areas where one could tell there used to be fire pits.

I looked to Bill. “You didn't have to come with us,” I told him but he simply nodded.

“I gave my word I would help find your friend. I am one of the tribe's best trackers and scout.” His reply was monotone and I could tell no sort of reasoning would have him change his mind. Braeburn spoke up and led us further into the camp.

“C'mon, the entrance tah the mine is just over here,” Braeburn said as he led us over.

“Say... cousin, how long has it been since anypony was around these parts minin'?” Applejack asked, Braeburn shrugging.

“Don't rightly know. Grampa used tah talk about how his father worked in the mine just before it closed... so uhh, it's definitely been some time,” he answered honestly. Lassie walked up a bit closer to him.

“So... if nopony has been around these parts in ages, save for maybe a few scavengers or treasure hunters... how do you know where the entrance is?” she asked, Braeburn stopping for a moment.

“Ah... well, like ah said... had a dream 'bout it when the elder put us to sleep with that smoke. It was quite vivid and... it was almost like I was trapped in some kinda... roller coaster or something, zooming all through the country side straight tah this place. Entered the mining cave right...” he trailed off and swallowed, pointing towards a cavernous hole that used to be boarded up, the boards having been smashed down. “There... ah was pulled inta the cave but... it was dark, an' cold an'... well, then ah woke up,” he told us.

I looked to Bill and shot him a question. “What's with the dreams we had?” I asked just as we reached the mine entrance.

“It is the great elder's inner peace herbs. They say the smoke doesn't put you to sleep, it takes your spirit from your body and lets you transcend to the plains of the other world. There, you may witness future events or perhaps epiphanies... but that is just what some say,” he told us and my body shuddered. Considering what just happened with Braeburn, I'd consider those to be pretty accurate rumors.

“Okay... how far down do you think this goes?” I asked, nopony else answering. “Yeah... figured as much.” I stepped forwards and felt a cold, howling wind exit the cave. “Don't suppose any of you have a-” I was cut off as Lassie pulled out a couple of flashlights from her travel bag.

“SEEEEE?!” she quipped at Applejack as she walked past her, lightly slapping the farmer across the face with her tail as she walked past. “Not just guns...” she said as she offered us all a flashlight though Bill declined, stating he could see just fine in the dark.

“Huh... smart thinking,” I told her and she nodded.

“Like Rarity says, a gal should always cum prepared,” she laughed as she led the way into the mine. Even the insides were run down in here. It looked like the tunnels could collapse at any given moment.

Braeburn came up beside me to speak. “So... uhh... yer wearing that vest ah gave yah?” he asked and I nodded.

“Surprised? I wasn't kidding when I said I liked it. It's pretty nice,” I replied with a smile, Braeburn nodding.

“A-ah dunno. Just... well, Applejack's been sayin' things 'bout yah an'... well, ah don't know what tah think. It's just... well, ah kinda didn't expect tah see yah wearing the vest is all. Most of the time when yah give somepony a gift, yah hardly ever see 'em wear it. Not that it's a bad thing, it's just... well, she also said that yah used tah run around in some skull shirt killin' ponies,” he said and I nodded.

“Yeah... I did,” I answered, Braeburn stopping for a moment and falling a few steps behind with a quiet 'Oh' escaping his mouth. I stopped and nodded for him to keep up. “Come on, it's a complicated story and it wasn't really me doing it. I'll tell you over a glass of cider once this is all over,” I assured him.

Coming around a corner, we all gasped and shuffled back into the shadows. “Shit...” Lassie swore as she peaked back around the corner, seeing the two guards that stood posted down the tunnel, right in our way. “I'll handle them-” she began while actioning the rifle.

“No, wait!” I hissed, grabbing the barrel of the rifle. She gave me a look, along with Applejack. “I got a better idea... you still got that porn magazine?”...

* * *

The two guards stood idly by, bored and barely paying attention. “Man... why are we always stuck on guard duty?” one of the guards asked, the other shrugging.

“Because we're-” he was cut off by the sound of some rocks bouncing across the ground. Lifting their spears, the second one called out. “Alright! Who's out there?! Show yourself!” he yelled. “Bumble Berry, that better not be you again!” he warned.

A few moments passed and the first guard huffed. “C'mon... better go check it out,” he said, the second nodding in agreement as he traded his spear for the lantern.

The duo walked down the dark tunnel, the second holding up the dim lantern while the other held a spear at the ready. Coming around the corner, they both halted in their tracks, looking around. "Huh..." the second guard muttered as he squinted his eyes. "I swear I coulda..." he trailed off with a deep gasp as he pointed to the ground. “LOOK!”

The first looked down and dropped his spear. “UGH! The new issue of Playcolt limited... uhhhh!” he shuddered as he hunched down by the magazine, the second following suit.

“Oooh... oh-ho... oooh...” the second whispered as as he flipped open the magazine. As the two huddled by the magazine, a group shuffled along the wall of the tunnel, very discretely and quietly, slipping past the guards without a hitch...

* * *

“Oh man... what?” Lassie asked as we put distance between us and the two guards. “That was crazy... I thought for sure we'd have to put them down,” she mentioned.

“Of course that would be yer first decision,” Applejack commented, making Lassie sigh.

“Listen, if you're going to be sour this whole time...” she trailed off as we all stopped. It just got a little colder... and somehow darker. “Maybe we should keep it down?” Lassie whispered as we neared a fork in the path. “Great... which way now?” she asked. We stood there for just a few seconds before Braeburn and Applejack took a few steps down the right path, turning back to us with a shrug.

“Flip a coin?” Lassie asked.

“Well, I mean, there's five of us so we could always just vote,” I suggested, taking a look down the left path while Lassie took a few steps down the right one. “Looks like the left path might get a bit more narro-” I was cut off by a regal voice.

“Ahh, I was wondering when you'd show up,” spoke the voice, Lassie and I pivoting on our heels.

“Princess Celestia?!” we both gasped as the regal princess stopped just a few feet away from us. “W-what... what are you doing here?” I stammered out. Surely she wouldn't bother herself with this.

“Hmm... so you still haven't figured it out? I guess it's true what they say. You really can't teach an old dog new tricks, now can you?” she asked, a glint in her eyes.

“Princess!” Applejack called out as she went to approach.

“Ahh... I was hoping you'd bring the purple one, but I guess any element of harmony will do,” Celestia stated, making me perk a brow.

“What... what the hay are you talking about?!” I asked, not taking a liking to her voice.

Her horn lit up in a brilliant mass of color but nothing happened. “WHAT?!” she boomed in disbelief and I blinked unsurely, taking a step back as did Lassie and Bill. “What is this magic you...” she turned to Applejack and hammered her with a magical blast.

“APPLEJACK!” I yelled out, turning to see my friend... err, whatever she was now, get tossed against the mining tunnel wall, Braeburn gasping and rushing to his cousin's side.

“FUCK THIS!” Lassie yelled, flipping the levergun off her back in a dazzling display and leveling her sights on the princess. Celestia however, was already one step ahead, the upper ceiling to the tunnel collapsing in front of Lassie and cutting her off from us.

I turned to face Celestia as the ground continued to shake from the collapsed tunnel. “What the buck Celestia?!” I yelled, fists clenched.

The princess took a relaxed pose as a laughing echoed from behind her. “Tsk-tsk-tsk...” taunted a voice. Bill however wasn't one to wait around to see what was going to happen and charged the princess while the figure from the shadows was emerging. A brilliant beam of energy shot out from near the figure and hammered Bill in the gut, knocking him back and to the ground, leaving me to gasp and face the figure alone as Bill grunted and groaned on the ground behind me, the smoking wound in his gut smoldering.

“What the hay is going on?!” I roared, a calm voice answering me... one that had my body tensing stiffly.

“You know... for such a successful pony... err, person... you really are incompetent, you know that? Or perhaps... Derreck was the key to your success...” the figure, a stallion, trailed off as he came to a stop beside Celestia, cloaked in a robe. “And you were just the failure that was holding him back since the beginning, but I guess we'll never really know, will we?” he laughed as he pulled back his robe's hood, revealing a blue face and horn. My fists clenched even harder, brows narrowing.

Bill groaned from behind me as he struggled to try and get up. “You like?” Tristan asked as he levitated out the two mystic railguns... the only two prototypes from Manehatten. “I think they were supposed to be called HE-ARC... Hyper Electromagnetic-Automatic Rail Cannon... but I suppose we'll never know about that either, huh?” he asked tauntingly.

“I don't get it! Celestia! Why are you siding with him?!” I snarled, Tristan laughing so hard tears nearly came to his eyes.

“You still don't know?! Even right this second you can't figure it out?!" he laughed maniacally before sighing. "You never thought for one moment that Celestia was acting a little out of character, not like her old self?! Did you really think she would normally be that mean, sadistic and cruel. That she'd stab Derreck in the back by having her sister and you destroy him after having him complete her various tasks?!” Tristan laughed at me. “Maybe this will convince you... Celestia, darling, give me a kiss,” he said and I watched in shock and horror as Celestia's eyes glinted and she leaned over to kiss Tristan on the lips, a grunt leaving my mouth as it started to piece together.

“You see... when I first faced you in Ponyville, I realized that your brutal, unethical tactics would be impossible for me to defeat, and hence... I'd never be able to take over Equestria... well, originally I just wanted my sister to love me, but everypony kept getting in the way, so I realized the only way to achieve my goal was to completely take over Equestria-” I cut him short.

“You're a sick, twisted fuck! I aughta rip your-” He cut me short by pointing one of the railguns at me.

“Hush-hush now, I'm not finished. I realized, in that moment... the only way I could overtake Equestria is if I were to whittle it down, so to speak. I knew that Celestia would send guards after me after the whole Ponyville incident and that she'd be able to sense my magical powers so... I needed a new plan. I quickly began going over various spells and such, trying to think of something, anything... that would let me become more powerful, powerful enough to best you and any other alicorn. See, Twilight was easy to defeat. She may have been a prodigy unicorn and now an alicorn but she hasn't reached her full potential as of yet. However... alas... there was no such spell that could grant me the power I needed but even so...” He walked around to the other side of Celestia.

“Something... came to mind... something, even I don't know why I didn't think of before. Trickery. I realized, the best way to beat my enemies is to pin them against each other. And who better to secretly terrorize my enemies than the most beloved and powerful alicorn of all time?” he asked.

“But how?! She would've dusted you in a second!” I snarled and he nodded.

“Exactly, smart cookie. Face to face, yes... yes she would've. But alas, that's where I am truly smarter than all of you. You see, I read up on all forms of magic, dark included. And... King Sombra had a most interesting spell that would weaken one's will and then-” he clapped, letting out a loud smacking echo that traveled down the tunnel. “Mind control, just like Queen Chrysalis. And just like that, I thought I had the world at my hoof tips but then... an even greater power emerged. That... Derreck Parker fellow... his powers were completely uncontrollable, like a blazing wildfire. His energy was so dark and corrupted I doubted even Celestia and I could stand against him... and then I realized it... he trusted, or a least listened, to Celestia. All I had to do was have her order Derreck, you, to destroy all of my enemies for me. In doing so the rest of the world would view you as evil, or at least a destructive force that was not needed and everypony would eventually band together to destroy the entity known as Derreck. After that, I was half expecting Nightmare Moon to destroy you for having killed her love interest but alas, this incident with Daring Do has put a slight hitch in my plan but even so. I do believe Celestia can handle Nightmare Moon, after all, she has defeated her once before and now even has the help of her sister. I was originally going to let her vanquish you then have the Elements of Harmony finish her off once and for all but even so. Having an Element bearer here will shorten my list of enemies,” he told me.

“So that's it... you mother fucker... shit... fuck! Why didn't I figure it out sooner?!” I roared, namely to myself.

“Because... you're a failure, a reject, a disgrace... does that sound familiar... and fairly close to the reality of it?” he taunted. I let out a roar as I charged at him, but both his cannons were up in a flash, firing out hyper accelerated projectiles that almost looked like beams of energy.

The rounds punched through me, leaving sizzling hot wounds gaping in my body as beam after beam lanced through me, quickly cutting me into Swiss cheese as I gasped, feeling the shots travel through organs and cutting apart vital arteries while some of the rounds struck bones but deflected off. One round struck my skull and it was all over. I felt my body falling into a pit of darkness, a shrieking cloaked figure flying after me, his bony face all too familiar...

* * *

Third person...

Evan's body dropped to the ground in a heap, blood puddling around him as his wounds let off smoke. Bill groaned as he tried to stand up but was kicked onto his back by Celestia. “You... you think you'll get some kind of satisfaction from me... that because I'm old and blind that I'll beg?! I'll never bow down to you! Not like this!” he snapped. “You may have once been the goddess of this world, it's protector... but you are now nothing more than a puppet!” Bill coughed, Tristan laughing as he stepped forwards.

“Such valiant and courageous words,” he mocked, Bill spitting blood at him

“Do your WORST!” Bill said firmly, Tristan snickering as he leveled one of the HE-ARCs at him.

“So be it,” he said casually, triggering the weapon and blowing a hole clean through Bill's head, the buffalo's eyes going wide as his body lay lifelessly limp against the ground...

Author's Note

Bud-dum-tssh! I did have the chapter done this weekend, but as usual something happened. Actually, it was just before Father's Day. As most of you may know from reading this story, I never actually had a father in my life but I did have a father figure. And on Saturday him and I went down to the Chevrolet dealership to get him a new truck and I just kinda wanted to have the picture of after he got the truck to show you guys and gals

Chapter 79

'Face to face...'

Tristan looked down to the man whom was once a legendary fighter, revered by others for his prowess and near indestructibility. Looking next to Celestia, he let out a soft laugh. “Strange really... thinking back on it. I almost wish I could have fought him at his full potential, to see what he was really capable of... but I suppose the capable one was his other half.”

Horn lighting up, Tristan focused his levitation spell on the man's body but struggled when it wouldn't budge. “What?!” he grunted, focusing harder but to no avail. “What is this?!” Tristan snapped, unable to grasp the concept of why he couldn't even budge the man.

The hypnotized Celestia slowly stepped up to the man and gave him a slight nudge with one of her front hooves, frowning slightly as she inspected one of his gaping wounds. “As I expected,” she noted, pointing to one of his chest wounds that revealed his rib cage. “My sister's... other, has gifted him with Shadow Steel, encasing his entire skeletal structure with it. Being fused with his body, it has allowed him, even after death, to resist most forms of magic,” the alicorn informed, to which the younger stallion cocked a brow.

“I don't understand. He has been hit with magical blasts in the past, why is this metal so effective against levitation but not other forms of magic?” he asked in slight irritation. Celestia shrugged.

“It's the way Nightmare Moon designed it. Trying to muster enough magic to levitate him will be about as successful as trying to make two positive ends of a magnet connect,” she told him, Tristan grunting irritably.

“I never intended for him to arrive for Daring. I was truly hoping he'd stick to his retirement plan. Even so, I can improvise perfectly. Though I truly would like to keep his corpse for decoration in my throne room... when I make it of course. His head will symbolize one of my grandest achievements... such a pity really,” he muttered, Celestia ducking her head under the man's body and sliding him onto her back with a slight grunt of effort.

As Tristan's eyes went wide, Celestia looked to him with a rather blank expression. “He may be near impossible to grasp hold of with magic, but that doesn't make him impervious to physical handling,” Celestia told him, letting out a heavy exhale as she felt his heavy weight atop of her, nearly four times the weight she expected from the man.

“Excellent. You truly are a magnificent help,” Tristan mentioned as he turned to leave, Celestia speaking up and nabbing his attention.

“What of his company?” the alicorn goddess asked, Tristan looking back to the deceased body of Bill.

“I will say, I never gave him so much as a second thought when I saw him but... now that you mention it, I suppose his abilities are on par with even that of Senka. Being able to ascend past a handicap of visual loss yet still able to be more perceptive than the average pony is truly remarkable... though he was never a threat to my overtaking of Equestria, I suppose his exceptional skill deserves him at least some form of farewell bidding rather than being left to rot in an abandoned mine...” Tristan's horn lighting up and encasing Bill's body with a magical aura.

Seconds past and the buffalo's body slowly started to change to a dark shade of gray before rapidly crumbling into a pile of ash and being blown away down the tunnel system. “Yes... well, now then. Onto the task at hoof,” Tristan mentioned as he began to walk down the tunnel system of the mine, Celestia nodding in response.

“Yes, master,” she replied, Tristan stopping for a moment.

“Can you... say that again?” he asked in a pleased tone.

“Yes, master,” Celestia repeated, her eyes glinting from the mind control.

“Ahhh,” Tristan sighed in relief. “I love hearing that...”

* * *

Applejack groaned in pain as Braeburn and Lassie helped her to all fours. “Ah... ah don't get it! Why did Celestia do that?!” she grumbled painfully. Lassie opened up her bag and began rummaging through it. Seeing this, Applejack scoffed. “Let me guess, more guns?” Applejack coughed painfully, Lassie rolling her eyes.

“Yes, you nimrod. Hmm... where did I...” she began tossing various items out of the bag, including camping supplies, sex toys and currency. “Found it!... okay, just hold still,” Lassie said as she pulled out a small container.

“What... what is that?” Applejack asked, groaning in pain as she tried to slide back while Lassie took some of the gel into her paw. Reaching forwards to spread it on the mare's injuries, Applejack swatted away Lassie's paw. “What is that?!” she demanded, Lassie rolling her eyes as she took another pawful of the gel.

“Just let me put it on you, alright?” she demanded, going to apply the mystery gel to Applejack's injuries, which was again thwarted when the mare swatted Lassie's paw.

“Not till ah know what yer tryin' tah do!” she snapped, Braeburn stepping into the argument.

“Come on cousin. She's obviously tryin' tah help,” he tried to assure her but the farmer mare would have none of it. Lassie scoffed as she took another pawful of the gel and gave Applejack an annoyed look.

“Oh jeez. Frig, it's some hocus pokus recipe that Zecora made up and gave me a while ago. Now hold still, you've already wasted more than half of it,” she grumbled as she applied the pawful of gel and gently rubbed it on Applejack's injured chest.

Slowly, the bruises and small cuts began to heal. Taking another pawful, Lassie rubbed it on Applejack's hindleg, depleting the reserve of the restorative jelly. “There... good as new. And as a bonus, unlike the hospital's healing potion, you're not left a gushing wet horny mess,” Lassie said with a smile. “But I'm still ticked you wasted half of it.”

The group stood up and Lassie tossed a few more things out of her bag, muttering to herself how she wished she could keep some of the things but needed to lighten the load. Applejack brushed herself off then looked to the dog. “Yah coulda just told me what it was instead a just tryin' rub it all over me,” she snapped Lassie rolling her eyes. “But... thank yah, all the same,” the mare gave a nod which Lassie returned.

Lassie actioned the levergun and looked down the only way they could travel. “Okay Braeburn... how do we get back there to rescue Evan and Bill?” she asked, the stallion blinking in complete shock.

“H-how should ah know?!” he stammered, Lassie rolling her eyes.

“Because you had that dream. Come on, there had to be more to it,” she noted, Braeburn merely shaking his head. “Great... so now we're traveling blind,” she grumbled, Braeburn speaking up again.

“B-bu-but... ain't yah a... a dog?” he asked, Lassie perking a brow.

“Yeah, why?” she asked back, Braeburn pausing for a moment before speaking.

“W-well... you got that nose, right?” he asked, Lassie giving him a mortified look.

“Oh, you are not saying what I think you're saying!” she stomped, Braeburn flinching slightly.

“Glorious Luna, ah'm sorry. Ah'm from Appleloosa. Crazy stuff just comes outta muh mouth sometimes, yah know?” he replied back, Applejack lost in slight confusion.

“Ah don't get it. What does bein' a dog have tah do with-” she began, Lassie cutting her short before she could finish her question.

“He's saying that because I'm a dog, I can...” she trailed off, her nose wiggling subconsciously and head turning to the direction it led. “Oh wait... hold on... I think I got something...” she told them as her head lowered to the ground and she began to follow the scent of the trail...

* * *

Celestia followed Tristan into the small camp they had set up in the mine, dumping Evan's body on the ground in a heap. Letting out an exhausted exhale, Celestia wiped the sweat from her brow. Tristan looked to the body of the elderly man whom once posed the greatest threat to him. “There must be an easier way to transport his corpse,” Tristan muttered. “Just leave him here. We'll have Rufus's stallions pick him up on the way out. For now, let's see if those incompetent idiots have managed to lure out Lassie and the others,” he told Celesta whom nodded in return.

Grabbing a nearby lantern, Tristan covered his facial features once more with his cloak's hood and began his journey down into the catacombs of the mine, Celestia in tow...

* * *

Lassie's tail wagged from side to side as she sniffed her way along the trail, leading the others through near darkness, the only source of light being that of a glowing vibrator she had kept which she made Applejack carry.

Stopping at a crossroad in the path, Lassie looked both ways, sniffing the ground profusely. Applejack leaned down beside the dog. “Well... which way?” the farmer asked, Lassie raising a brow as if conflicted about her thoughts.

“But... wait, that can't be...” the dog muttered to herself, walking down the path to the right with the other two following in close pursuit. “She's alone... but she should be-” Lassie was cut off as she bumped into a mare's rear end, having been previously fixated on the ground and following the scent.

Both parties let out a combined gasp of fright as they looked to face each other. “DARING?!” Lassie gasped as the mare looked to the group.

“Back off! I'm warning you! That book belongs in a museum!” the adventurer mare warned, Lassie waving her paws in defense.

“Hold on, wait! We came to... hold the phone. What's going on here? You're supposed to be tied up and gagged.” Lassie rose a brow, Daring taking a defensive stance.

“Ha, more of Ahuizotl's goons? Or maybe your with Rufus?” she challenged, Lassie looking at her with a truly stunned look.

“What?! No! I'm with Evan. Somepony...” she trailed off in total loss. “You were tied up and gagged and needed to be rescued,” Lassie commented, Daring laughing heartily.

“Me?! Needing to be rescued?! Bwahahaha, I never need to be rescued,” she laughed. Lassie paused for a moment before taking a step closer. “Hey, woah, step back. I don't know who you are. Besides, you could be working for Ahuizotl and just making up a fib,” she commented, Lassie shaking her head.

Taking a close look at the mare, Lassie motioned with her paw. “Applejack... you still have that photo of Daring, right?” she asked, Braeburn totally bewildered by the events unfolding in front of him.

“W-wait... ai-ain't yah t-that mare from the... them adventurin' books?” Braeburn stammered, vaguely remembering seeing the mare before them on several posters and book covers. Applejack took out the photo of Daring Do tied up and gave it to Lassie, Braeburn gasping in response. “Yah'll had a picture of her that yah didn't give tah the sheriff?! It coulda-” he was cut off by Lassie as she took hold of the photo.

“We can't let everypony know she's real. She has to be kept a...” Lassie trailed off as she looked at the photo then to Daring. “I don't get it... in this photo, you're tied up but...” Lassie looked at Daring, into her eyes, then gasped with a horrible realization. “Oh no!” she cried out, Applejack running to her side.

“What is it?!” AJ gasped, Lassie slowly handing over the photo.

“You tell me..." she told the mare before shaking her head and muttering to herself. "No. No, I can't believe this!” Lassie groaned as Applejack took hold of the photo and inspected it under the light of the glowing vibrator. “We were duped.”

Applejack looked at the photo while rubbing her chin in thought, then looked up to Daring whom rose a brow. Looking back down to the photo, the realization hit her as well. “Ah shoot! Darn it! Ain't her!” she snapped, Daring taking a step back in slight hesitancy as she and Braeburn spoke in unison.

“W-what do you mean it's not?” they both asked, Applejack handing the photo to her cousin.

“You tell me Brae. Yah always was a smart cookie,” she noted, her cousin looking at the photo with a perked brow.

“W-well... well, it's her...” he said, pointing to Daring whom slowly and most cautiously walked over to look at the photo. “B-but... but she's tied up,” he mentioned, Daring peaking over his shoulder.

Applejack shook her head. “Is it really her Brae, take a good long look at it,” AJ made mention, the stallion looking hard at the photo before turning his head to look at Daring, whom was just inches away from him as she had been looking over his shoulder at the photo.

They went silent for just a moment as they locked eyes in utter silence. Their faces were so close they could feel one another's breath. “Uhm... sorry for being so close, I was just-” Daring began to step back before Braeburn grabbed her by the shoulder, holding her in place and leaning closer. "W-wha... what are you doing?" the mare asked hesitantly as she tried to pull away.

“No, wait,” he said in haste, Daring raising a worried brow.

“You're not gonna try to-” she was cut off by Braeburn's realization.

“She's not Daring Do,” he announced, the mare taking a quick step back and breaking his hold.

“Woah! Hey now, listen... nopony is even supposed to know-” she was cut off as Braeburn interrupted her by handing over the photo while speaking.

“No... ah meant... 'she' ain't the real Daring Do. The one in the picture ah mean,” he told her, Daring taking one good, unobstructed, look at the photo before smirking.

“Well duh... I don't have blue eyes. Mine are purple,” she answered before blinking hesitantly. “Why... you didn't seriously believe that I got tied up and... and believed this was me... and came to rescue...” her words began to slow as she realized they had come to rescue her on the false pretext she needed to be saved.

Lassie cursed to herself as she looked down the tunnel system of the mine. “We were duped... somepony wanted us to come here for some reason. Or maybe they just needed us to come somewhere secluded so they could... Celestia, you bitch,” Lassie cursed under her breath, Daring raising a brow.

“Wait... what's Celestia got to-” she was cut off by a somewhat frantic Lassie.

“What are you after? This adventure, what are you trying to find?!” she snapped, Daring blinking unsurely.

“W-well... there's an old legend about-” she received a brisk slap across the cheek from Lassie whom immediately spoke up.

“I don't want to know about it, just what it is!” she ordered, Daring rubbing her cheek.

“The book of Unlimited Fantasy,” she answered, Lassie raising a brow.

“Huh... sounds like a porno... what does it do?” Lassie asked curiously, Daring raising a brow as she protested.

“I was about to tell you then you slapped me saying you didn't want to know about it!” Daring nearly yelled, Lassie huffing before slapping herself.

“Look, there, now we're even. Now get on with it. There's a reason we're all involved with this and to find out what that reason is, we need to know everything we possibly can...”

* * *

Evan's perspective...

I found myself gasping for air, withering on the ground... feeling completely naked... cold...

There was a dark presence nearby. I could feel it. I winced and whined out a painful cry as I rolled over, my good eye going wide as I found myself before Death. I let out a stifled grunt as I tried to shuffle back, to escape him but it was no use. I was already caught.

“Fear not, for I have not come for you yet.” His voice was like sharp daggers, slashing into me. His mere presence here struck fear into the deepest parts of me. His hellish red eyes glowed from within the black confines of his hood. I couldn't even muster the strength to let out a roar or even a yell...

“For your time, is yet to come, but...” he trailed off and the scenery quickly changed to something more comforting. A beautiful meadow, with grass taller than knee height. Just Death's upper body, though cloaked, was visible.

A gentle, pleasantly warm, wind gushed by, the grass wavering in the gentle breeze. I heard giggling, laughter, pleasant conversation... I attempted to look up but found the grass blocking my view.

Death walked over and helped me to my feet, placing my right arm across his shoulders and supporting my weight. “Wait... but don't I die if you touch me?” I asked but he never answered. “Death?” I asked but he merely shushed me, pointing out with his bony hoof to the scene before us. I watched as... it was me. I used to think I looked so old in this vision of what was to be the future but now... I seemed to be the same age.

A few tears dribbled down my face, realizing how much time I had wasted, how much time I should have spent with...

I looked to see Twilight resting on her haunches, sitting on a picnic blanket as I... played with my daughter in the fields, with Spike and the Cutie Mark Crusaders. “She... my daughter... the first time you showed me... she was a son,” I mentioned, Death nodding but not speaking as we continued to watch the scene unfold. “Why are you showing me this?!” I growled, making Death chuckle to himself.

“Have you still not realized?” he asked, making me lose myself in wonder.

'Realized what? I don't get it... that I'm not going to die? That despite everything I've done, I'll live to have a happy ending?' I thought to myself, watching silently. Everything seemed so... perfect, I didn't understand.

“Even now, watching this before your own eyes, you can't see it?” Death asked. I was still lost. He seemed so cynical, like what we were watching had some dark meaning to it. “Or rather, who you can't see?” he laughed. I rose a brow.

“Can't see?” I asked aloud. “Who can't I see?” I asked, puzzled.

“Exactly... who has been missing since the beginning? A few minor things may have changed in these visions of yours, but one thing has remained constant,” he remarked in a darkening tone.

I blinked as I looked out. I still didn't quite understand what he meant. There were lots of ponies not here. It wasn't like I was looking at a big portrait of everypony I knew. I was just watching a relaxing afternoon with my fami...

“UGH!” I gasped out as the realization struck me like a punch in the gut. “NO! Not her!” I yelled. Sure, The Cutie Mark Crusaders have their sisters and perhaps they should be here too, and maybe the rest of Twilight's friends... but no matter what, thick and thin... Lassie has been with me since the very beginning, hardly ever leaving my side. She was most possibly my closest friend, on par with Derpy. She was like that perverted older sister or the horny aunt that still gives intellectual words of wisdom... To think she wouldn't come along for an afternoon in the sun...

I turned to Death. “What happens to her?!” I yelled, panic starting to invoke me.

“The same thing that happens to all of you,” he replied cynically. My body tensed. I couldn't let anything happen to her...

* * *

Third person...

Daring looked with peculiar interest towards Applejack, whom lit there way. “So... why exactly are you carrying around a glowing dildo?” she asked, Applejack's face quickly turning to a frown as she audibly cleared her throat.

“Because somepony fergot tah bring a flashlight,” she remarked, Lassie stopping for a moment.

“Well sorry, Missy. It's not like I can predict the future and think of every possible thing we need. What? My glowing vibrator not up to your standards or something?” she shot back, Daring snickering to herself.

“And here I thought you all were playing it smart by traveling with a dim light source so you wouldn't be detected,” she laughed, Lassie looking to Daring then to Applejack.

“See? She understands. I'm intelligent even when I'm making mistakes,” the dog laughed, Braburn merely shaking his head and wondering to himself just what exactly he got himself into.

Daring snickered to herself as she rummaged through her saddle bags and pulled out a torch, promptly igniting it and lighting the way. “If you don't mind...” she smiled with a roll of her eyes, Applejack's jaw hanging slightly agape.

“So... yah had that torch but yah was just walkin' along this whole time makin' me carry this... this?!” she said in a disgusted tone, tossing the glowing sex toy away, Lassie gasping out in protest.

“Hey! That was one of my favorite toys! It was modeled after Sylvester Stallion! FUCK!” she cried out, Daring just stifling a laugh as she continued on, Braeburn quickly catching up and walking alongside the adventure mare.

Deciding to finally speak, he turned to the new addition of their group. “So this... fairy tale book... it can bring anything tah life?” he asked in wonder, Daring shrugging.

“Well... in a sense. As the old legend goes, it was a great mystical spell caster book that could make any dream a reality. You know, bring about happiness to foals and all that. Anything you could imagine, you could make happen with this book, and this book alone. And, go figure, it didn't take long for some pony to abuse the book's power and try to overthrow Equestria with it's seemingly unlimited potential, so the book was cast away and hidden forever... so the legend goes,” she told the young stallion who blinked in fascination.

“Wow... so then, if it was cast away tah never be found again, how'd yah figure out it was here?” he asked in pure amazement as the group continued down the tunnel of the old mines.

“Same way I uncover all of the artifacts I find. A few rumors here, a few legends there, an old map from a traveling merchant and then bump into Ahuizotl or Rufus, get in a big confrontation, totally beat them then bring whichever artifact to the Museum in Canterlot... usually,” she informed, Braeburn lost in a world of amazement.

“Wow, that's incred-” he was cut off as Lassie gasped in utter shock.

“WOAH! You're in my head?!” she burst out randomly, the others all stopping with expressions of confusion. “So you're telepathic now too?! L-like, a psychic?” she asked aloud, the others still all lost in wonder. “What do you mean just listen to you?! This is a serious-” she was cut off by something that was silent to the rest of the group.

“Uh-huh... yeah?... o-okay... wait, no way! Celestia just tried to kill us!” she screamed out. “Uhh, yeah! She did. She blasted Applejack into a wall and nearly collapsed the tunnel on top of us!” she yelled back. “What do you mean where are we?! Where are you?... Are you okay?!” she asked herself, the others all lost in confusion.

“Uhh, yes it matters! We thought you were-” she was cut off again but only momentarily. “What?! Mind control! Who in the hay of it could mind control an Alicorn?! Celestia no less!” she exclaimed but didn't say anything after that, going silent for a moment. “Hello? Hey, you there?” she asked then sighed. “Hey listen, I know you said listen because you didn't have a lot of time, but seriously... come on, I gotta know... hello?” she asked then gave a confused look.

“H-hello?” she asked, mimicking movements as though she was talking on a telephone. “Huh... he hung up on me...” she said as she hung up the imaginary phone. Turning around, she looked to the others with wide eyes.

“You guys... you won't believe it,” she said, Braeburn speaking up.

“Who was yah talkin' tah just there?” he asked curiously, wondering just what exactly had went on.

“Evan was just inside of me...” she snickered. “I mean... not like inside of me, but like Inside of me, you know?” she told them, Applejack scoffing at her lewd remarks.

“Just what the hay is going on? Yah'll was talking about Celestia, so what exactly did he say. And how the hay did he talk tah yah if he wasn't here?!” she interrogated, Lassie huffing.

“Well, if you'd let me speak, I could tell you... jeez,” Lassie remarked, clearing her throat. “So... there we were, just the four of us. Embarking on a great adventure to retrieve The-” Daring cut Lassie short.

“Yeah, we already know all that. Get to the talking part,” she said in a blatant voice, the canine companion of the group huffing.

“Jeez, and ponies call me needy and particular... fine, we'll just cut to the good part,” she muttered. “So as we were doing our thing, without warning, Evan suddenly came inside of me, hahahaha," she laughed, the others not feeling her sense of lewd humor. "Okay, sorry, sheesh... I'll be serious about it. Seemed like the perfect opportunity to drop that line..." Lassie huffed. "So anyway, Evan just blurted into my head, all like 'LASSIEEEEEEEE'!” She screamed out in a dramatic way. “And I was all like 'Woah! You're in my head?!' and that's when I realized it. He must be telepathic now too... you know, it's totally unfair. He doesn't even have a unicorn horn... I mean, he does have a unihorn but... hee-hee...” she trailed off as the group gave her a look. “Okay, being serious...” She brushed off her shoulder.

“So anyway, he was all like 'Lassie, this is super important, you need to listen to me' but I was totally like 'Just listen to you?! This is super important. You're telepathic now!' And then he cut me off and said something like 'Just listen alright!' and he screamed that it was super duper important so I was just like 'Uh-huh.' And he said to take it seriously because if I didn't, I would die so I was like 'Yeah?' and he screamed and was all frantic and started begging me to take him seriously because he didn't want me to die so I was like 'Ooookay...' and he was like 'Whatever you do, don't confront Celestia. She's not actually bad,' and I was like 'Wait! No way! Celestia just tried to kill us!' and I was gonna yell at him for telling me to take him seriously because he didn't want me to die, then turning around and telling me not to fight Celestia meanwhile she just tried to kill all of us,” Lassie took in a huge breath before continuing.

“AND THEN, he was like 'Celestia didn't really try to kill you!' and I was like 'Uhh, yeah, she did!' and I reminded him about how she blew Applejack into a wall and nearly crushed us all to death by collapsing the tunnel on top of us. After that he asked me where we were and I thought to myself, 'Hold on, Celestia separated us. So that meant Evan and Bill were left alone with her,' so I asked him where he was but he said he didn't know. So I asked if he was okay. He said it didn't matter and I told him it totally did matter because we all thought he might be dead but he cut me off again and told me Celestia was under mind control. I was all like 'What?! Mind control?!' because seriously... who the hay would be able to mind control Celestia of all ponies but when I asked him who was mind controlling her, he hung up on me... or, whatever it is when you don't answer someone back with your new telepathic powers... and... and then you guys asked what happened,” she finished her story with a huge exhale. “Man... that was a mouthful... heh-heh. Mouthful.”

Daring scratched the back of her head. “I... I wonder if it's Rufus,” she mentioned, the others all looking to her. “If he's got his dirty hooves on that book, there's no telling what he's capable of,” she informed them, Applejack speaking up and addressing Lassie.

“So, yer saying Celestia wasn't acting on her own will? That somepony else was makin' her do what she did?” she asked, Lassie giving her a stupidified look.

“Yes Applejack. That's what mind control means. I know, it's big words for you, just try to keep up, alright?” she insulted the farmer pony, their relationship deteriorating even further, as it had been doing so since the beginning of the adventure. Just before the farmer could reply however, a new voice yelled out.

“Hey! They're over here!” the stallion thug screamed out, charging at the group. They all turned to him with a shocked look but Braeburn was the first to act, tackling himself into the stallion and struggling around on the ground with the aggressor.

“Hold him down!” Lassie called out, jumping in and slapping a pair of fluffy pink hoof-cuffs on the stallion, effectively cuffing the stallion's forelegs behind his back.

“HELP! THEY'RE OVER HERE-” the stallion was cut off as Daring shoved a hoof in his mouth.

“Do you have something to keep this guy quiet? He's one of Rufus's thugs,” she asked, Lassie nodding with a wide grin.

“Oh yeah... I have something that can keep him quiet...”

* * *

Evan's perspective...

My world was shrouded in darkness. I could feel my body... devastated and riddled. I could hardly even process thoughts... and I couldn't breathe. My lungs... my heart as well...

I heard hoofsteps walking along and entering the area where I was. “This is getting out of hoof. I should have never agreed to this stupid alliance,” grumbled one voice. He sounded... older, more defined... experienced.

“I know boss. This is ridiculous. One of our guys were just found blindfolded with a red ball gag in his mouth. He says Daring is here with a talking dog and two farmers... I mean, she usually works alone but... a talking dog?!” the second voice stated.

“I know... this has all gone to everypony's head. First that blue unicorn shows up with Celestia off all ponies, then has us join forces with Ahuizotl... now this?!” he snapped. I couldn't see what was going on, my eyes were closed and there was some kind of blanket or tarp over my body.

There was a brief period of silence before the second voice spoke. “So... is that really him?” the second asked. I wondered if he was referring to me but I quickly got my answer.

“Yes... that's him! He wasn't even supposed to be involved with this. That blue idiot said somepony else was supposed to show up. Sent a picture of somepony he had mocked up like Daring, all tied up, to get her to come rescue Daring, or whom she thought was Daring... and 'he' showed up instead... I swear, I doubt this stallion's plan is going to go accordingly.” The first was probably speaking about Tristan but... how come they didn't want me showing up, and who was this mystery mare they wanted to come instead of me?

“Can I take a look?” the first asked, the second huffing.

“Fine, just make it quick... I don't even know if I want to stick around anymore... all for a stupid foal's fantasy book or something...” the first grumbled. I felt the cover being pulled off my body, followed by an awing gasp from the second stallion.

“Woah... look at this guy...” the second mentioned, the first huffing out audibly.

“I know. It's disgusting to think that blue unicorn wants to keep his body as a trophy,” the first noted. I thought to myself... 'Tristan considers me a trophy?'

“Woah... just look at his bones... they're not even damaged... and they're fuming some kinda blue smoke,” the second mentioned, the first quickly cutting in.

“Just!... stop already. Stop poking around that guy's body for Celestia's sake. For all you know that blue smoke could be poisonous,” the first shouted. I could feel the stallion's hoof poke at my body, feeling into one of many holes that riddled me.

“His bones feel like... like they're made of metal or something,” the second noted just as I felt my body start to kick back into gear. Very slowly, I could feel my heart start to flicker back to life, my lungs beginning to take in small amounts of oxygen... very slowly, the machine that was my body, began to start all over again.

“I said stop touching it!” the first yelled out furiously. “It's bad enough that blue flank-hat wants us to carry him out of this retched tunnel, but now you've taken interest in his-” the first was cut off by the second.

“Uhh... boss..." the first said in a wavering voice of worry. "There's something wrong here...” the first stammered out, growing increasingly worried by the second.

“Yes! I know! You won't stop poking around every single part of him!” he shouted, the second gulping loudly as he spoke.

“N-no... no, it's not that... his heart... i-it's beating... and his wounds, they're closing shut... Rufus, I don't think this guy is-” I cut him short with a powerful boot between his hind legs, a screaming yelp leaving the thug's mouth as he collapsed to the ground in withering pain.

I slowly came to my feet as I stood tall, wincing a bit as I licked my lips, tasting the ever present brassy flavor of blood in my mouth. Rufus, going on what the second stallion addressed him as, stumbled back in fear.

“B-but y-you-you're... you're supposed t-to be dead!” he blabbered out and I nodded with a furious expression coming across my face.

“I'm only gonna ask this once, bud,” I told him as my fists clenched, blood oozing out of my wounds and dripping off my knuckles. “Where are they?”

* * *

Third person...

Lassie scratched the back of her head as the group continued on through the tunnels. Her and Applejack kept their space away from one another, an ever rising tension growing between the two.

Braeburn however, kept talking with Daring, completely enthralled by the the mare's various adventures and endeavors. “You mean to tell me, not only did you fend off a pack of ravage Timberwolves, but you did so while poisoned?” Braeburn gasped out, Daring chuckling slightly.

“Yeah... kind of amazing when you think about it I guess,” she chuckled with a rub against the back of her mane, blushing slightly at the thought of other ponies completely awed by her stories. Lassie got a few paces closer as she spoke up.

“Hey... I thought you were supposed to be all secretive and work alone and all that gab... so what gives?” she asked curiously, Daring shrugging.

“Well... this has started to get out of my scope, if you know what I mean. Originally I wanted Evan to help me out for this exact reason. Plus... this guy already figured out who I am, so why not tell him a little bit? Get him to trust me and realize I really am on his side. I guess a few of Evan's lessons to me have started to sink in... besides, even if he was to go out and start telling ponies that he met Daring Do in real life... who would really believe him?” she asked, the group going silent for a moment as Braeburn wondered to himself, Daring giving him a wink.

“But you're not going to tell anypony, right?” she asked and Braeburn quickly shook his head in haste.

“N-no, ah would never think about it. Yah have my word ah'll keep yer secret,” he said as they continued along. Lassie fell behind slightly as she unslung Daisy, the levergun she had taken a liking too. It certainly was pretty. Derpy and her had made sure of that when they painted it with Evan. She smiled as she reminisced on all the adventures they had together, her and Evan.

As the group rounded the corner, Braeburn continued to speak but was cut off by Daring as she gasped, wrapping a hoof around his mouth as she pulled him back around the corner, the group going silent.

“Shhhoot!” Daring whispered to herself as she cautiously peeked her head around the corner again. Ahead of them lay an open pit inside the mine, the area having been widened out with multiple spotlights set up and several guard posts. Several old crates of dynamite were scattered about as well, some of them starting to 'sweat'.

“Jeez... this is crazy...” Daring muttered to herself as she looked out to the open pit, several guard ponies stationed keeping watch, while others dug. Her right ear flickered as she caught wind of a certain voice, her head tilting just a few millimeters more as she tried to spot the voice's owner.

“And I said I want it found now! We've already been here for two weeks and I don't want to spend another minute down here!” screamed the hulking mass of muscle that Daring knew all too well.

“Ahuizotl... I should've know you were behind this. Rufus doesn't have the brains to orchestrate something of this magnitude...” she whispered to herself, before promptly noticing Braeburn's head leaning out past hers with a look of curiosity on his face. Daring rolled her eyes as she shoved him back behind the corner.

Leaning back behind cover, she let out a sigh. “Okay... this is the crazy part. We could, if we had the time, wait for them to uncover this relic. Or... we have to somehow scare off all his thugs, and probably him too, and then go get the book for oursel-" Daring cut herself short as she gave a puzzled look. "Wait, hold on... we're missing somepony...” she mentioned, looking to Applejack and Braeburn whom also looked to each other.

Applejack turned around to where Lassie had previously been, quickly scowling at the fact the dog had taken off. “Figures. Loyal muh flank,” she muttered. Daring let out a quiet exhale before looking back to the dig site.

“Doesn't matter. Looks like Ahuizotl has found where it's burried. No matter what happens, he can't leave with the-” she was cut off as a limp body hit the ground a few feet ahead of her, making her stumble back in shock. “What the?-” she cut herself off as she watched a large pink box slither along undetected. “Deh... wha...” Daring watched in utter disbelief as the box went along completely undetected, even slipping by right in front of some guards. “That's... impossible...” Daring muttered, Braeburn leaning out past Daring to take a better look.

“That's amazing...” the stallion complimented, Daring rolling her eyes as she again pushed him back. As Daring watched, she gritted her teeth just as the box slipped right by the open dig pit.

“Ugh... she's going the wrong way!” Daring cursed to herself, watching as the dog slipped right by their prize.

“Or is she?” Braeburn asked quizzically, again leaning out. Daring looked to him with a narrow eyed look.

“You're not very discrete, are you?” she asked, Braeburn shaking his head then pointing back to the pit.

“No, not entirely... but she certainly is,” he mentioned, pointing to Lassie whom was ascending up some scaffolding that no doubt was a makeshift lookout tower. Applejack watched as well before briefly wondering how exactly Lassie managed to sneak past their own group without detection. The tunnel only went one way, meaning she would have had to slip right past all of them to get out there.

The farmer mare turned back to where Lassie had once resided, noticing a note taped to the glowing sex toy she had tossed away earlier. Walking over, she picked it up and read it aloud. “Trust me...” she said, the other two looking to her, Braeburn speaking up.

“What's that cousin?” he asked, Applejack's eyes going wide with realization.

“That... that dog! Ah can't believe she's really gonna...” she growled, taking a look around the corner, causing Daring to groan.

“Seriously... this is why I work alone,” she muttered, Applejack shushing her.

“This is serious... oh no... all them ponies,” Applejack whispered in despair, Daring perking a brow.

“What about them?” Daring asked back, also taking a look as Lassie ascended the scaffolding tower like a ninja, doing several flips and leaps in perfect stealth.

“Lassie... she's gonna shoot 'em all... ah just know it!” Applejack said in distraught, Braeburn's eyes going wide. Daring blinked as she looked out, biting her lip slightly as she thought to herself.

'Sure they're bad, but they certainly don't deserve that kind of punishment...'

Lassie flipped up onto the scaffolding platform at the top, sneaking up behind the guard and chopping at the corner of his neck with her paw, the stallion's body going limp and falling to the floor.

Lassie grabbed his body before it tumbled off the platform, setting the body aside as she dumped her duffle bag beside her. Reaching into her leather jacket's pocket, she fished out a gizmo that used to belong to Evan. “Huh... now, I think...” she fitted the gadget to the side of her head, the ear piece fitting in nicely while the eye piece came to life in front of her right eye.

“Oooh... this thing is so cool,” she whispered to herself with a gentle laugh as she tapped a few buttons on the side of the gadget, a few diagnostics and readouts appearing before her eye on the display screen.

Reaching into the duffle bag, she pulled out her instrument of greatness...

Ahuizotl looked to his underlings with fury. He had been there long enough in his opinion, all for a stupid cause that wasn't really his own. Sure he had been promised Daring Do in return but this seemingly simple endeavor had turned into a long dragged out labor effort in the end.

“I want double work shifts starting now! Don't stop until-” he was cut off by a glass shattering crash, turning all the attention over to one of the scaffolding towers where the flood lights had gone dark. The lights that had been kicked off were smashed against the ground, sparking and sizzling with small currents of electricity.

Several other lights flashed over to the guard tower, the lights searching up and down the tower until they lit up the top, where a lone dog stood idly on her hind legs. “What is the meaning of this?!” Ahuizotl screamed out. “Guards, get that dog down from there!” he hollered, several ponies rushing towards the tower.

Suddenly, and without much warning, an ear piercing buzzing echoed throughout the entire mine. Dirt and debris kicked up just a few feet in front of the charging ponies, bullets taking chunks at a time out of the ground.

Scrambling on their hooves, the ponies ran for cover as Lassie chased them off with the minigun. It's barrels spun at a cyclic rate so extreme the barrels themselves were a mere blur, illuminated by the constant fury of the muzzle flash. The barrels of the mighty gun burst with energy, the muzzle flash a seemingly constant, endless blinding light.

Several screams were drowned out by the sound of the gun as ponies scrambled for cover, and for their lives. Lassie tilted her body slightly and chewed apart some of the ground flood lights with the massive machinegun, the lights sparking as they were shredded apart, several more screams being doused by the awe inspiring noise of the whirring minigun.

“RUN!” screamed one of the thugs, dashing off for an exit, with several others chasing after him. An arrow plinked off the scaffolding below Lassie, taking her attention to a pony armed with a crossbow across the pit on another scaffolding tower.

Raising her minigun, she opened fire and chewed apart the supporting structure of the tower, the support braces quickly shredded like Swiss cheese and promptly crumpling down to the ground. The stallion posted there let out an iconic scream as he fell to the ground with a 'THUMP', soon after getting up and limping away.

“Where are you going, COWARDS!” Ahuizotl screamed out in rage, watching as his henchponies all scrambled away for their lives. Several of the laborers scrambled out of the pit, ditching their work equipment and taking off. Ahuizotl grabbed one of the thugs trying to leave. “Stand tall and fight!” He yelled just before a few bullets chipped away at the ground nearby, making him flinch and release his grip on the stallion, whom promptly took off with the others.

The gun's terror shifted over to a nearby generator, spewing several jacketed rounds into the machine. Sparks and crackles of electricity fizzled before it died, along with several of the spotlights. With most of the pit now dimly lit, the true terror of the machinegun was unleashed, its blazing barrels illuminating the mine with a constant bright flash, still dumping out a mass of ammunition.

Swinging the gun to another side of the pit, she chewed apart more of the scaffolding used as defense posts, with even more of Ahuizotl's thugs abandoning ship as they ran off. “IT'S NOT SHOOTING AT YOU!” He screamed, taking notice on how not even one pony had died, not even the stallion that fell from the scaffolding.

“GET BACK HERE!” Ahuizotl roared, his voice almost on par with the blazing Gatling gun. A few more bullets chipped away at the ground nearby before the gun ceased, coming to a whirring stop in Lassie's paws.

Dropping the gun into the pile of brass beside her, she pulled out a single shot grenade launcher from the duffle bag, taking aim and plundering out a round that struck an unoccupied defense post. The shock wave caused by the explosion ripped through the underground mine, enough to make even Ahuizotl's most trusted stallions turn tail.

Flipping open the break action breach, Lassie gave the weapon a slight shake, emptying out the empty shell before replacing it with a fresh one.

'SHOOOMP'

With a flick of her wrist, the weapon locked closed and she took aim upon a small bundle of unused scaffolding where some of Ahuizotl's last stallions hid. Seeing her aim down at them, the stallions screamed and took off running.

When they were finally a safe distance away, Lassie fired, the grenade round rupturing upon impact and sending several of the pieces of scaffolding flying through the air, accompanied by the mass fireball from the explosion...

* * *

Moments earlier...

“What is that?! What in the hay is going on?!” Tristan yelled as he hurried down the tunnel ways in slight haste, Celestia following him with a blank expression on her face, still under his mind control.

Several ponies scurried by them, frantic and panicked beyond belief. “Where... where are you going... hey!” Tristan shouted out, the buzzing still echoing down the tunnels of the mine. “It must be her... so, she's finally made her move,” he muttered just as the buzzing stopped. He perked a brow before the ground beneath his hooves shook, small bits of debris falling from the roof of the tunnel system as the explosion threatened the structural integrity of the entire mine, some of the lights flickering.

“Is she mad?!” the blue unicorn stammered with his eyes wide, more ponies flocking past him. “So be it... Celestia!” he ordered, the elegant alicorn mare stepping up beside him. “You go fetch Evan's body! I'll take care of her myself,” Tristan announced.

“Yes, master,” Celestia said in a monotone voice, slowly trotting away to go retrieve the body of the man while Tristan made his way to the mine pit...

The Eagle Eye on Lassie's face scanned the area, only picking up one remaining life form. “Go on. Run away you overgrown pussy cat,” Lassie called out as a bunch of readings came up on her display screen, indicating the ammo count of her minigun to be at 0, along with stating Ahuizotl's estimated mass and distance from her.

“I can see through your petty attempts, dog!” the beast yelled back, Lassie sighing as she leveled the cannon at him. Ahuizotl however, didn't even flinch as he stared her down. With a huff, Lassie moved her sights slightly and fired, the blast coming dangerously close to blowing the beast to pieces, but Lassie's calculations were relatively spot on, the concussive blast knocking Ahuizotl back and his body falling down to the bottom of the pit.

Lassie smirked to herself as she dropped the grenade cannon, having depleted her ammo reserves for both weapons. The Eagle Eye scanned the area before giving her an after action report, ammo expenditure came up on the screen followed by causalities which read 0.2.

“Ohh pfft... for buck sakes. Yeah, so I hurt that one stallion that fell off the scaffolding and maybe gave puss puss over there a broken rib from the fall...” she muttered before climbing down. “Okay! Daring?! The bad guys are gone!” she called out, Daring and the others slowly walking out to the pitt.

Braeburn rushed over. “That was incredible! Just unbelievable! We thought yah was gonna kill them, but instead yah just scared them off!” Braeburn complimented, Lassie shrugging.

“Meh, it was nothing,” she yelled back modestly from her scaffolding tower before looking to Applejack. “See? What I tell yah? Have a bit of faith in the ol' dog,” she poked with a wink, Applejack rolling her eyes.

“Fine... ah'll give yah that one. Ah really did think yah was gonna kill all them ponies and ah'm quite relieved yah proved me wrong... maybe... maybe yah ain't so bad after all,” she admitted, though rather reluctantly.

Lassie turned to Daring Do. “So... Ms. Adventurer Mare... ready to find your-” she stopped herself as a slow clapping echoed out, gaining everypony's attention.

“Bravo... bravo... what a wonderful, happy ending, hmm?” he asked, slowly walking forwards from the dark shadows that once confined him, rolling back his hood as he approached. “Ahh, it's so good to finally meet you Lassie. I've put in a lot of effort to make this all happen. Though there have been a few hiccups along the way, I must admit.”

Lassie let out a deep gasp. “That's... you... you're... that stallion... the one from my dreams... UGH! he must be the one who brainwashed Celestia!” Lassie announced to the others, Tristan clapping with a hearty chuckle.

“Ahhh, two points to the mutt. What else?” he asked, Lassie spitting to the side.

“I'm a purebred!” she snapped, Tristan sighing with a roll of his eyes.

“You!” Applejack snarled, Tristan looking to her.

“Ah yes... the orange one... I remember you like it was yesterday. So stubborn and ignorant,” he mentioned, Lassie raising a brow.

“W-wait... who is this guy?” Lassie asked, not knowing him from looks alone.

“Tristan,” Applejack snarled as her lips curled back, Lassie's doing the same. Braeburn and Daring were left a little in the dark, having no previous understanding of who he really was or what he had done.

Lassie's fur along her spine rose up as she lowered her front half. “So... you're the puke that raped his own sister, huh?” she growled, anger rising. Tristan sighed as he brushed off his shoulder.

“Well... that's a little harsh, don't you think? I don't believe rape is an appropriate word for the love I share with my sister,” he spoke in a relatively calm voice, Applejack shooting back at him with a voice as sharp as daggers.

“It's only one way, and it's wrong what yah did!” she snapped, Tristan huffing to himself.

“Well... and here I was ready to invite you all to tea and biscuits... oh well,” he sighed as he let his cloak fall to the ground...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

I rushed along through the tunnel ways. I knew, deep down, that had to be Lassie. I damned myself for not knowing how to properly use telepathy. Only that short, brief moment and I didn't even get my message across. All I had to say was that Celestia was under mind control and that a stallion named Tristan was the one behind it... and that he might kill her.

Why didn't I see it before? Lassie had said a blue unicorn killed her in her dream... but those weren't dreams we all had, they were epiphanies. If only I had've been blunt about it...

I turned a corner and had to stop for a moment, wheezing as I nearly doubled over from the exhaustion of sprinting. Good goddess I was terrible. Not only hadn't I properly warned Lassie, but I doubt in this shape I'd even be able to help her.

I winced as I took in a deep breath, a tear forming in my eye. This was what it meant... my dream. Derreck was always there for me... and since he was me, he'd always be there for my friends... and I had killed him because Tristan had tricked me by using Celestia to convince Luna to convince me... “Fuck...” I swore coldly, coughing violently as I tried to recompose myself. He would've been able to stop Tristan... and probably Celestia too... and this was all my fault.

My fists clenched as I punched the stone wall, letting out a yelp as it ripped up the flesh around my knuckles. 'Note to self... punching wall hurts...' I thought as I held my bleeding hand. Gosh... I was so-

My mind was cut off in a blinding white light as an agonizing pain burned throughout my entire body. I could see brief images of my skeleton beneath my skin while lightning sizzled me, launching me down the hallway some distance.

As the lightning ceased, I found myself withering on the ground in agonizing pain. “Ugh... mmphff... gah!” I screamed out, twitching involuntarily just as another burst of lightning hit me, skidding me down the path a few more feet as my skeleton was illuminated by the lightning.

“Conductive... isn't it?” came a regal voice. My whole body was shaking in pain as I slowly looked to where the voice had come from. Celestia slowly trotted forwards, a slow clip clop echoing from her strides.

I let out an audibly pained groan as I tried to stand but was rewarded by torrents of lightning that hurtled my body down the tunnel even further. My body sizzled and crackled, my skeletal frame visible as my body glowed with a bluish translucency.

“Ahhh... Celestia... wait,” I begged, my body being grabbed by the lightning she emitted from her horn tossing me into a wall this time while she laughed.

“I was baffled at first. Thoroughly shocked,” she told me, her hoofsteps drawing ever closer. “When I couldn't grasp you in a levitation spell, my thoughts were puzzled, until I thought of Derreck and Nightmare... interesting she would gift him with such a prize but I suppose love does silly things to ponies' minds.” Her voice was sharp yet with a monotone feel to it. She wasn't acting on her own free will, I knew that. But even if I wanted to, I couldn't surmount to her level, not anymore... if only Derreck was here-

Torrents of lightning hurtled me once again, my screams echoing down the tunnels, accompanied by the static crackling of her blasts. My muscles felt tensed, cramped... I could barely breath.

“I realized she had gifted him by encased his skeleton with that blasted Shadow Steel. Nearly indestructible. Solid down to a molecular level. Impervious to most forms of magic... however, a metal is still metal and all metal is conductive, isn't it?” she asked.

There was nothing I could do...

* * *

Third person...

Applejack took a raging charge at Tristan, Lassie calling out in protest just before Tristan grabbed hold of her with a telekinetic grasp. “Tsk, tsk, tsk... you earth ponies never learn do you? So thick headed!” He snapped as he tossed her across the open pit, into a wall on the other side of the open area.

Braeburn let out a cry as he rushed to his cousin's side, leaving Lassie and Daring to face Tristan by themselves. Lassie took a brief look over her shoulders, heart beginning to pump at an accelerated rate. “Don't worry about her,” Tristan chuckled, bringing her attention back to him. “She won't have died from a mere hit like that,” he chuckled. Daring stepped a little closer to Lassie.

“I have a plan,” she whispered through the side of her mouth. “You gotta buy me some time though,” she whispered, Tristan slowly trotting towards them with a prideful stride. Lassie quickly spoke up.

“If Daring wasn't actually captured, what gives with the photo? If you wanted us to come so bad, why not just send a letter telling us where you were?” Lassie began, trying to play along with Daring's plan.

“Simple isn't it? If everypony found out, my plan would be foiled. Nopony can know Celestia is sided with me. Not yet anyway. I was half expecting Evan to stick to his promise he gave to Twilight and retire, and his powers would further recess. However, you... well, you Lassie, you'd still pose an incredible threat,” he stated, Lassie perking a brow.

“I... I do?” she asked, Tristan laughing.

“Oh course! You're one of Evan's closest friends, and one of the most talented combatants I've ever seen. Don't tell me they don't appreciate you as much as you deserve,” he said in a suave voice, Lassie stepping back with Daring stepping behind her.

“Can it bud. Your flattery won't work on me,” she quipped, Tristan rolling his eyes.

“Flattery isn't the objective. What I was getting at was that you are talented beyond belief in armed combat... even going as far as being lethal. You could easily throw a wrench into my plans. I knew if I sent a photo of a mare in distress it would conflict Evan, even more so if it was somepony he knew but had little contact with. It would foil my plan if I had sent a photo of Derpy but he ended up running into her before anything was done. On top of that, I needed somepony whom he didn't fully care for, somepony who he would ultimately leave to their fate. However, I knew he'd most likely discuss it with you and you... well, you believe in justice and rightfulness. You would come in a heartbeat. I knew you'd find me. After I took care of you, it would leave Evan thoroughly defeated and I could reveal to Nightmare Moon, through Celestia, that it was Evan and Luna whom destroyed Derreck. In retaliation she would destroy them both he and Luna but the Elements of Harmony would destroy her in a destructively enticing battle. After that, Twilight would be left ultimately crushed by the loss of her lover however. I would have Celestia opt to comfort her, bringing her away from her friends long enough to erase her from the picture. And without a pivotal player, the one who orchestrates nearly all of their plans... The Element Bearers would fall to Celestia's wrath and with it, I would overthrow Equestria and finally... the love I give to my sister would no longer be shunned,” he informed her.

Lassie took a deep breath, firmly planting herself on the spot. Dropping her duffle bag, she went for her 30-30 levergun but Tristan's horn quickly lit up, knocking it out of her grasp and tossing it away. “You won't be needing that... but I give you one last option. Join me... and together, we can overthrow Equestria,” he offered.

Lassie stood to her hindlegs, taking a defensive stance as she readied herself for the fight that was sure to come with her response. “No deal,” she quipped, Tristan sighing as his horn lit up.

“So be it,” he answered back, grabbing Lassie. However, just before he could toss her, much less even lift her, she reached into her jacket pocket and pitched a small baggy at the blue stallion, taking him by complete surprise.

A black plume of smoke engulfed him, Lassie released from his grasp and quickly looking to Daring. “Go! I'll buy you some time!” she screamed, playing along with Daring's plan. The mare nodded and took off, running towards the exit. “HEY!” Lassie screamed out as she watched Daring take off. She turned back to the fume of smoke that was starting to settle. 'Maybe Evan was right about her... double crossing coont...' Lassie thought to herself as she watched the smoke clear.

“Nice trick, but it will do you no good!” Tristan snapped as his horn began to glow but suddenly sent shocks down his body, making him flinch with a small yelp. Touching his horn, he let out a deep breath of disbelief as he felt the pitch black shards that we embedded into his horn. “WHAT?!” he screamed in anger, Lassie smirking.

“Like you said bub, a real threat... now, let's bumble-”

Daring slid down to the bottom of the pit without notice, everypony else thinking she had taken off like a coward. “This shouldn't be too hard,” she muttered to herself, looking around at the excavating machinery.

A low rumbling from behind had her turning her head rather slowly, followed by her whole body turning around as she came face to face with Ahuizotl. “Always speaking too soon, little pony,” he cackled, Daring huffing in return.

“Let's settle things between you and me, you big oaf,” she challenged back, the big lumbering hulk charging at her wildly...

Lassie circled Tristan, keeping her distance as she recalled her dream of Tristan impaling her with his horn. “So be it,” the stallion said confidently as he shed his robe, letting it drop to the ground beside him.

Lassie pondered her thoughts, wondering exactly how physically strong the stallion was. “Jeez... if only Derreck was here...” she whispered under her breath, knowing the other half of Evan could've smoked him in a second.

She dared her luck, making the first move as she slowly edged forward towards the stallion whom still stood on all fours. Taking a few more cautious steps forwards, she faked a punch to Tristan, drawing out a reaction from the stallion.

Tristan lurched forwards, attempting to stab her with his horn. Lassie however was already in the motion of her jump, leaping into the air with a flip and landing on Tristan's back before he could even react to the new circumstances.

She dropped a heavy heel kick into the back of his head before leaping off him, letting the stallion stumble forwards. Twirling on his heels, he turned to face her, fury in his eyes. Still not having a knowing to his physical extent, she kept her distance for the time being, playing it safe...

Ahuizotl charged Daring like a freight train, attempting to crush her in one blow. Leaping into the air, she took flight, the hulking mass slamming into some metal scaffolding and ringing his bells. “UGHAAAAH! GET DOWN HERE, LITTLE PONY!” He boomed, catching Lassie's attention for a split second as she looked behind herself, noticing Daring mid-flight.

'Huh... maybe she's not so bad after all,' she thought to herself as she returned to her own fight.

Daring zipped down head on towards Ahuizotl, giving the big creature a small window to defend himself. Going into a defensive stance, he readied himself for the blow that never came as he expected. Zig zagging last second, Daring cruised around his defense like a pro, hammering him in the side and having him emit a yelp.

The beast staggered from the blow before regaining his footing to face the nimble pegasus. “When I get my hands on you!” Ahuizotl roared, lunging forwards but missing horribly as Daring darted out of the way, the mass of muscle crashing into the ground and skidding along from his momentum.

Clenching his eyes shut in frustration, he staggered back to his feet and turned to face her. “What's wrong Ahuizotl? Cat got your tongue?” she poked, the beast's face going beat red in anger as he charged her again, even more wild than before which made it all the more easy for Daring to leap around him.

Crashing into the ground yet again, his body unearthed a corner of a hardcover book, making Daring's eyes go wide. “The book!” she whispered, hoping Ahuizotl hadn't noticed it...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

Withering on the ground, Celestia trotted up to my side, shaking her head. “So, very, very disappointing. You should have stayed at home and died under whatever rock you crawled out of. Then at least you could have died by your loving family, not in some hole where nopony will ever know what happened to you...” she told me as she stopped a few paces away from my still smoldering body. “How much punishment do you think you can take before you regenesis finally caves to my unequaled powers? I am the goddess of Equestria. There is no other pony so lovely and beloved as I,” she announced and I exhaled painfully with a soft grunt.

“Please... Celestia... don't do this...” I begged, the regal ruler laughing.

“Has it really come to this? Pitiful begging?” she asked insultingly, pushing her hoof against my shoulder and rolling me over onto my back. “You used to be legendary warrior with unmatched potential and now here you lay, begging me,” she laughed. My head flumped against the ground as I winced.

Of all the things... here I was... 'Looming death cloud...' my thoughts came to me of my first impression when I me her, all that time ago, probably a thought spurred on by Derreck... 'Oh Derreck... how sorry I am,' I thought to myself. Sure he wasn't the good guy, more like a brutal anti-hero... The Punisher... heh... he was better than me... he was the best. He fought all walks of life and evil... even mystic beings... the Hydra... Ursa Majors... but even then, he showed compassion to his rivals, like the Teumessian Fox...

My eyes opened to the thought of that. When it had kissed me and Derreck begrudgingly wondered if it was a male or not... and it's gift to us... to me...

“One last chance...” I said to myself, Celestia laughing.

“Or what? What are you going to-” she cut herself off as my body disappeared into a puff of red dust, my body immediately teleporting directly above her as I let out one last final roar of power, mustering a great deal of power behind my swing. She barely managed to look as the side of my palm connected with the corner of her neck.

Celestia let out a gasp as time seemed to stand still, my hand chopped against her neck. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head as she collapsed onto the ground, myself falling on top of her.

Regardless of her actions, she wasn't acting on her own will and I couldn't kill her for that, not even being able to bring myself to hurt her beyond reason. A non-lethal knockout strike would be enough for now.

I let out a pained groan. On top of her brutal assault to me, that teleportation had drained me completely. I could barely move. But I needed too...

My eyes closed for a second and I was plagued by the vision of the future. It seemed marry and grand at first glance, but in knowing that Lassie was dead and hence her exclusion... the vision skipped to a new scene.

It was Lassie and Tristan! They were fighting, somewhere in the mine!

My eyes shot open as I staggered to my feet, knowing I had to save her. Looking down, I winced. I couldn't just leave Celestia here. She needed to be saved but that was out of my league. But I couldn't just leave her here.

I grunted as I heaved her up onto my shoulder. Nopony left behind... not my friends... not my family... sure, she hadn't been either of those really but that didn't change what I was going to do.

I searched deep down... how would I even find them? This place could be huge...

As my eyes closed, everything began to materialize before me. I could see and hear everything as my senses kicked into an unnaturally high state of alertness. It was like sonar or something...

My nostrils twitched and I could smell apples. My eyes shot open, my vision blurry since Celestia's lightning had knocked off my eye patch. I knew where I needed to be...

* * *

Third person...

Lassie twirled in an acrobatic way, booting Tristan across the jaw and staggering him. “Give up, it's over,” she offered, Tristan's horn trying to ignite with magic but the dark shards again causing him pain as it stifled his magic.

“I've got it!” screamed a voice, causing both Lassie and Tristan to look to the pit. Daring flew up with a rather large hardcover book that spanned nearly her whole chest.

Noticing her lack of attention, Tristan jumped at the dog. Barely having any time, Lassie leaned to the side and managed to dodge his impaling stab but was still tackled to the ground, Tristan holding her down in an aggressive hold.

Daring went to fly to the aid of her friend but was suddenly tackled from behind by Ahuizotl whom also pinned her to the ground, though she was held face down. “Boss, I've got it!” the beast called out to his boss. Tristan went to say something but an ear piercing 'KCK-BOOM' went off, one that would challenge the crack of thunder.

Tristan was nailed in the shoulder, blood spurting out as he was knocked off Lassie. Letting out a scream, he withered on the ground from the pain of the gunshot, giving Lassie her opportunity to get back on her paws.

Ahuizotl looked up in shock as the farmer mare stepped forwards, levergun in her grasp and barrel smoking. Before he could even do so much as blink, Daring took advantage of his shock and kicked him off her despite the weight difference.

Ahuizotl fell back into the pit while Lassie stood up, Applejack slowly trotting over while keeping the rifle trained on Tristan. “ENOUGH! Ain't nopony need tah get hurt bad!” she yelled out as Daring briskly trotted over, with Braeburn accompanying Applejack.

Tristan slid himself away from the group, his back against the ground as blood oozed from his shoulder. “Go ahead... shoot me,” he challenged. Applejack stood tall against his challenge.

“We're not like you,” she shot back as Lassie brushed herself off.

“Thanks AJ... nice shot,” she remarked, Applejack nodding slowly as she kept the rifle trained on him.

“Ah may not 'ave ever used one of these, but ah sure as shoot saw Evan wield one and it don't take long tah figure it out,” she said back, Tristan scowling.

“Just shoot me already!” he yelled, trying to stand up but having a swift kick to the nose from Lassie put him back down.

“So what now?” Daring asked curiously, beginning to stuff the book she had come for under her wing. Lassie began to say something before another voice entered the mix.

“GUYS!” Evan called out as he staggered into the open area, Celestia still unconscious in his arms. They all looked to him with shock, especially Tristan whom was baffled beyond belief from the fact the man, despite his age, had bested the most powerful alicorn in existence.

“Evan,” Lassie called out with the beginning of a smile. Just before anything else could be said, Tristan let out an exerted yell as his horn glowed brighter than ever before, sparks of dark magic from the shards thwarting his attempts at using magic.

In a fraction of a second the entire group looked to the stallion just as he let out the finale of his yell, the shards bursting from his horn with a brilliant flash which had everyone covering there eyes. There was a scream followed by a pained yelp.

As Evan lowered his arm from across his face, his expression going pale. Lassie hung from atop Tristan's held, held in place and impaled through the gut by his horn. “LASSIE!” He boomed as Applejack went to fire the rifle in her hooves.

Tristan gave his head a slight swing, tossing Lassie's body aside before his horn ignited and sent out a shock wave that knocked everyone back and to the ground. Braeburn and Applejack were tossed, the rifle rifle slipping from the mare's grip.

Daring was flung aside as the book fell from under her wing as she took flight to stop herself from crashing into the ground.

Evan hit the wall behind himself hard, Celestia falling from his hold. Tristan looked around to the scene then to the book that had been the bait for everything. “Humph...” he scoffed to himself as he slowly walked over, Ahuizotl crawling out of the pit and walking forwards as well.

“Boss, we did it! We got the book,” he told Tristan who just rolled his eyes.

“No you numskull. I got the book, and it was never the objective in the first place!” he shouted, unknowing that Evan was slowly crawling across the ground to his fallen friend, pulling himself along painfully with what little strength he had left.

Ahuizotl looked in shock to the stallion. “Boss, I don't understand,” he spoke out, Tristan rolling his eyes yet again.

“Yes, well let's just say your usefulness has come to an end,” he replied, his horn lighting up and blasting a beam of energy straight through Ahuizotl's gut. The big beast let out a bloody gasp, blood spurting from his mouth as he fell to the ground with smoke coming from the hole in his body.

* * *

Evan's perspective...

I crawled up to Lassie's side, wincing as I finally made it. “No... nononono, no this can't be happening...” I panicked, Lassie bringing a soft and gentle paw to my cheek.

“Relax...” she coughed with pain in her voice. No, this couldn't be happening, she was going to be okay... she had to be. She was Lassie.

“Lassie, I can fix this,” I said, coming back to all the teachings Derreck had taught me, and some I had learned on my own. My hand began to glow as I went to heal her wounds, much like I had Echo's cold, by taking it upon myself.

“No,” she groaned through a whisper, grabbing my wrist. I went to protest but she stopped me, putting a paw digit to my mouth. “It'll kill you... you-you've b-been through t-to much. I've seen what it does... does to your body...” she managed through gasps of pain. I went to say something but she again cut me off.

“Sssh... you have to... for Twilight...” she told me before closing her eyes and leaning her face towards mine, pressing her lips against my own as she wrapped her free paw around the back of my neck. The kiss only lasted but a moment before her head fell back, her body weakening by the second as I watched helplessly. “I've always wanted to do that... without you thinking I was being perverted...” she whispered as she reached into her coat pocket. “Now...” she whispered to me weakly.

Drawing out a shiny piece of metal, she put it in my palm and closed my fingers over the handle. “Never forget... who you are...” as her words hit my ears a memory burned into my head... it was from earlier in my life in Eqeuestria... the dream I had of the Fruity Hoops mascot killing Ally, my dog from Earth... but that wasn't a dream, it was an epiphany...

Her paw rested against my hand that was closed around the handle of Belladonna, but slowly slipped away as she went limp in my arms. “No... L-Lassie... Lassie...” I wept, tears dripping from my eyes. It couldn't be this way... it had to be a nightmare... or something horrid... it couldn't be...

I closed my eyes hard, an enchanting voice coming to me. “Evan? Are you there?” she asked. My eyes opened, and I could feel the fury burning deep down within. What I hadn't done all that time ago had finally caught up with me now...

“Where are you? I can feel your pain...” she asked.

'Nightmare?' I thought back, remembering her voice.

“I can feel your anguish building. A deep sense of sorrow. Are you alright? What's happening?” she asked. The lie was in my mind before I even thought of it. I was exhausted, my body nearly destroyed. I could barely even move.

'Tristan... he killed Lassie... and Derreck too!' I shouted telepathically. There was a short pause before I felt an even greater anger surge through me, a power beyond imagination. I felt my eyes shut before shooting open wide, my left eye no longer damaged and blurred.

A dark blue aura surrounded my body as I subconsciously stood tall, feeling a second presence stand with me, though in actuality there was nopony there. “TRISTAN!” My voice was like thunder.

The stallion turned to me and sighed casually. “What? Your puppy dog die on you? Oooh, too bad, so sad,” he laughed mockingly. My natural instinct would have been too just shoot him dead on the spot but instead I charged forwards like a mad beast, a burning fury deep within my eyes that was accompanied by fuming blue smoke that came from my left eye.

Tristan held the book open, horn glowing as he shouted something out. Nearly a dozen Timberwolves appeared before me, snarling and snapping, jaws drooling. I felt myself move like lightning, red fumes coming from my legs as I moved with the incredible speed of the Teumessian Fox.

I could feel Nightmare Moon's presence beside me as our motions were synced together, cutting through the Timberwolves in a matter of a heartbeat. Tristan screamed something again, this time a Chimera appearing before me.

Moving at an increasingly rapid pace, the side of my palm... and Nightmare's hoof, slashed the beast right in half, as though it were butter and our slash had been performed by a red hot katana.

The creature burst into sparkling dust, as had the Timberwolves before it. Tristan staggered back and began to stammer his words but finally roared out something fierce. The ground shook and Nightmare and I paused for just a moment.

Before us stood a massive being that had to slouch to avoid hitting the ceiling of the mine room we currently resided in. A gigantic blue mystic bear stood before us, it's body created by stars and its fur glowing brightly.

I felt oppressed but my body had other plans. “FEEL THE WRATH OF MY NIGHT!” I roared out, fist embedded with a blue glow as my body launched itself into the creature which attempted to swat me.

My body went too fast for the creature however and I found myself plowing right through it's chest, tunneling through it and coming out on the back side, a fury of sparkling dust bursting out with me. The beast let out a screech before bursting into magical dust, as all other previous creatures Tristan had conjured did before.

Tristan looked in utter disbelief before trying to take off. My body teleported before him, stronger than ever. The stallion, once so confident in himself, staggered back in fear. “Wha... what are?” he gasped in complete fear.

I winced slightly as I felt a great amount of stress flowing through my body, a pain I hadn't known before. “Your worst nightmare,” the words flowed through my mouth flawlessly. Suddenly, and to both Nightmare's and my own shock, Tristan repostered himself with a smile.

“Look at you, old man. You're ancient. Battered. Out of shape. Defeated and you don't even know it. Look how you're standing. You're about to keel over. You can't even lift that cannon!” he cackled.

I had no idea what he was talking about but I didn't care. My grip on the Desert Eagle tightened and I went to raise it but nearly collapsed as my heart clenched tightly in my chest, making me gasp.

My muscles began to convulse severely, Belladonna dropping from my grip as I fell to my knees, aura fading in an instant before I nearly doubled over, catching myself with my left hand as I gasped for air, heart beating at an irregular pace as my right hand gripped my chest.

“An alicorn's magic like Nightmare Moon's conveyed through your body?! Ha, what a foalish last ditch attempt! I should've known from the start what was going on!” he laughed. So that was it! Nightmare Moon... because she was part of me through the Shadow Steel that encased my skeleton, should could tap into me and use my body... much like Derreck had... but I couldn't handle the stress of it.

“Yes... realizing it all aren't you. Let it set in... not even an alicorn can stop me now-” he was cut off by his own scream as a thunderous gunshot went off, a hole tearing through his side. I heard the clacking lever action of Daisy and turned to see Applejack take better aim with the rifle.

Tristan's horn lit up and in an instant he was gone. In a brief moment, from the corner of my eye, I spotted old dilapitated crates of TNT sitting nearby, a couple dozen feet behind where he had been. “APPLEJACK!” I screamed out but it was too late, the shot was already off. The bullet whizzed through the air and blew into the unstable dynamite.

The explosion was massive and shook the entirety of the mine, the walls of the mine cracking and splintering as debris began to fall from above. My body was tossed through the air, closer to the group. Applejack and the others looked up as a large slab fell down towards us. I closed my eyes, not wanting to watch.

I half expected a scream or at least the crushing feel of the slab on my body, but neither happened and had me creaking my eyes open for a peak. There before us, Ahuizotl stood, having previously been absent before I closed my eyes.

Arms above his head, he had done the impossible and stopped the slab from crushing us to death. Tossing the slab of stone aside, he turned to our group. “Quickly, this way. Before the tunnel collapses on us all,” he ordered. I... I didn't understand...

He scooped up Celestia and went for the exit, the others all pausing. “What? Are you going to just wait there or-” he was cut off as his exit tunnel collapsed and he staggered back in shock.

Looking around he pointed to another exit. “There, into the tunnel!” He ordered, the others still hesitant. As more and more debris began to fall, the entire mine started to shake worse with every passing second. “You want to live?! Come on!” he roared, running for the exit.

Applejack looked to the exit then to Lassie's body. Dipping her head, she slipped the deceased dog's body onto her back before running for the exit, Braeburn and Daring in tow. “Don't forget Evan!” Applejack shouted, Braeburn making a slight detour in his path as he tried to scoop me up on the go but tripped over my extensively heavy body.

The others all looked to us in shock as Braeburn struggled to heave up my body, Ahuizotl quickly scoffing and running over. Heaving me up, the beast huffed. “Sweet Celestia, what do you eat?!” he complained before he took off down the tunnel, with us all in tow.

The clearing we had been in promptly collapsed, which spurred on the collapse of the rest of the mine. The tunnel we were in began to cave in behind us, the collapsing debris following us like some sort of action sequence from an old adventure movie.

We came into another huge opening in the mine that was also starting to collapse. Pieces from the roof of the cavern began to fall, the quaking beneath us making it feel like an earthquake. We stood on the edge of a cliff that overlooked a deep chasm. “Down there, jump,” Ahuizotl ordered, the others looking to him as Daring spoke up.

“No way. It's a trick!” she shouted. The beast pushed Braeburn and Applejack off first, the farmers letting out echoing screams as they fell. Daring went to attack but Ahuizotl grabbed her in his massive fist and jumped as well, pulling her down with us.

I felt the darkness envelope us before we hit water, hard. My world went dark as I lost consciousness from the impact, feeling the water wash over my body as I drifted away into an underwater current...

* * *

I awoke coughing and gagging, water coming up from my lungs. I nearly puked once or twice as I felt burly hands pulling me up and out of the stream. My eyes fluttered as I tried to make sense of it all. My world was spinning all around me as I felt my back dragged through soft beachy sand.

Finally my body was let go and the dragging came to a stop. I looked up to the hulking mass of muscle that had dragged me ashore. I wondered if perhaps it was another recurring memory of when Derreck had saved me. I could hear voices, distorted and blurred in my head. In my daze, I could see something above myself, in the clouds. The being was dark... shrouded in a cloud of shadows...

“Nightmare...” The words slipped out of my mouth in a mere whisper but even so, the other voices around me went silent. The goddess alicorn swept down gracefully, landing nearby and looking to Celestia. “Nightmare... wait...” I grunted, hearing her respond with a calming voice.

“No, dearest child. I am not whom you think I am. The one known as Nightmare Moon was banished long ago. Fret not, for I am not here to harm you.” Her words were so soft... so caring and loving... a voice that could sooth even the most damaged of souls...

“Princess Luna... what are yah doing here, yer majesty?” Applejack's voice came into focus and I shut my eyes, partially clenching them shut as I tried to move. I could hear Luna's hoofsteps trot away from me, towards Applejack as she spoke.

“I could feel my sister's inner conflict. Controlled yet trying to resist, as I had with Nightmare Moon so many years ago. I knew something was amidst and I came to... I'm sorry I had not arrived sooner to lend my support.” He voice sounded very sympathetic and saddened.

I heard another voice speak up, one more gruff and despised. “Well... if all is said and done, I'll be taking my leave,” came the masculine voice. I rolled onto my side with a groan of pain, looking to the creature known only as Ahuizotl.

“Why?” I coughed, the creature looking to me.

“There's nothing left here for me,” he answered as I rolled onto my stomach and groaned.

“No... why did you...” I trailed off, unable to finish my question of wonder. He was supposed to be the bad guy, so why did he save us? Sure, Tristan had betrayed him, but he could have just left us to die.

I didn't get an answer as he slowly walked away without another word. Braeburn came to my side and helped me to my feet, supporting part of my body weight as I struggled to stay standing.

Luna tipped her horn down to her sister's forehead, looking to me for a moment. “Excuse me for a moment. I must ensure my sister's well being, both mentally and physically,” she told us before her horn began to glow and her eyes shone brightly.

I turned to Daring, my chest heaving heavily as I struggled to breathe. “I thought... Ahuizotl was evil,” I wheezed, Daring shrugging with a somewhat saddened look to her.

“Evil? No... no, he was never really evil. Just disillusioned,” she responded.

I blinked and held my eyes shut as I asked a pressing question. “So... why did he save us then?” I asked curiously, hoping perhaps she had an answer.

“I suppose it's the old adage, the enemy of my enemy is my friend...” she trailed off with a sad tone to her voice. I didn't understand. Why was she so sad about all this? As I opened my eyes, my heart flickered and nearly stopped.

“Lassie,” I gasped, going to rush forwards but falling short as I tumbled off of Braeburn's support and fell face first into the sand. Crawling forwards while I groaned in pain, I looked to my friend... her fur soaked... body motionless...

“Lassie!” I cried out again, getting closer and having Applejack look away in sadness. I crawled up to Lassie and rolled her body over, tears dribbling from my eyes as I looked to her lifeless face...

“LAS-SAH-SIE!” I sobbed, my voice stammered and staggering on my sobs of sorrow. I scooped my arms under her and held her limp body to my chest. I just wanted her to do something. Anything. To have her open those eyes... just to say something perverted.

I just wanted to be able to tell her how much I love her and...

“No... no, Lassie, please...” I whimpered, my voice trembling. This couldn't be... it just couldn't. I heard a gasp and turned my heard to see Luna stumbling back and Celestia gasping for air followed by a scream of panic from the regal princess as she nearly jumped to all fours but her legs quickly wobbled and gave out.

“It's him!” she cried. “Quickly, we need to... to... to...” she trailed off with a deep swallow as she looked to the group, everything setting in for her. I didn't know what mind control was like, but I had a hinting suspicion she didn't quite have complete knowledge of what had happened.

I looked back to Lassie and dipped my head in shame. She had told me of her dream, of her future vision. She had asked if I would be there to save her if that time came and I promised her I would... and I failed... the more I thought about it, the more it sunk it. It seemed that everything I promised to do, I failed to see that promise through...

* * *

Days later...

We all stood at the top of the hill, several graves in front of us. Some were from ages ago, from different events that had unfolded, while three newer ones stood before us. Twilight stood beside me, hoof holding my hand as I stood, completely traumatized.

It just... everything had slipped away... and so quickly. I looked to Lassie's grave, situated beside the grave of her mother, or the one whom claimed to be her mother during our rescue of Lassie. The one whom had given her life for Lassie and in my books... well, nopony knew who Lassie's real parents were but she was close enough for me.

Celestia dipped her head in regret, feeling as though she had utterly betrayed us all and was left as devastated as I. Her sister stood beside her, trying to assure her what she had done had not been on her own will and that she was not to blame.

Daring, disguised as an older mare, stepped next to me as she went to make her leave. “I'm sorry for dragging you into this,” she apologized, both honestly and to try and keep true with the story.

In keeping with her life of secrecy, Applejack, myself and the others had to play like a young filly had been kidnapped, and Daring's character she disguised herself as was her pleading old mother whom came to me for help.

In playing true with the real events, I admitted to Twilight everything that had transpired, save for a few details that would have revealed her existence to Twilight's friends whom were there at the time of my confession.

Strangely though, Applejack came to my aid and said that I didn't want to go, but my conscious wouldn't just let me leave a pony to there fate and that she of all ponies convinced me to go and even accompanied me to make sure I saw it through... for the Element of Honesty, she had a way of twisting the truth.

I gave Daring a nod as she walked away, leaving me to turn back to Lassie's grave. I had buried her with Daisy, the lever action Winchester, seeing it somewhat fitting that she be buried with it.

My chest heaved with a heavy heart. This couldn't be... I kept telling myself that, in a convoluted hope that everything would change... that it would be just a bad dream... that I'd wake up in my bed beside my moth... Twilight, with Lassie snoozing peacefully at the base of our bed...

Celestia gave us all one final apology before her and Luna departed. Gosh... I never thought defeat could feel so bitter and... heartbreaking. Spike and The Cutie Mark Crusaders were the next to leave, as Lassie had a lasting impact on their lives that brought even more tears to their eyes than my own.

Seconds later, Chrysalis took flight. After the death of Max, Chrysalis's own dog, Lassie had given her a puppy that had been her and Max's pup. The gift had fluttered Chrysalis's heart in a way I doubted anything before had done. No pony, not even myself, had ever shown her such care and affection...

Twilight and her friends were the next to go, along with Trixie, whom were all effected by what had transpired for various reasons.

The only one of Twilight's friends not to leave was Applejack, whom slowly walked to my side as I looked to the next grave. 'Derreck...' I thought quietly, now even more crushed by the fact I couldn't, and would never again, hear his voice in my head.

“Ah'm so sorry,” Applejack whispered to me, her head hung low like my own. My eyes were kept close, trying to keep back the tears.

“For what?” I asked, just as a gentle breeze blustered by, weaving the soft grass against our legs. The sun was blocked out by gloomy grey clouds, making this all even harder to take.

“Fer... actin' like ah've been actin' lately. See... yah'll had dreams when we went tah rescue Darin'... an ah had one too. It was the memory a when yah ran inta that barn fire tah save muh sister, while we all watched. It... it made me realize how harsh ah been on yah'll... you an' Lassie. Yah didn't deserve one bit a what ah've been treatin' yah both like. Yah'll both helped the family farm in ways ah could never repay yah... an never judged me on nuthin. And yet when time came, ah judged yah both unreasonably... like ah was higher than yah er somethin'... ah just... ah'm so sorry. An' ah wish Lassie could be here tah hear it...” she told me, striking me deep.

I looked on to Derreck's grave. Trillium, the Mosin Nagant PU sniper rifle, leaning up against his grave stone. That was his rifle, no way around it. At first I wanted to bury it, but with no body to bury, I decided to leave it to perish away in the elements. It seemed disrespectful to do so but would be a constant reminder to myself of how badly I had betrayed him.

“Applejack... what happened was none of our fault... we all just contributed in some small way but none of us can be fully blamed,” I told her, my voice deep and betraying how I truly felt.

“Tristan can,” she said sharply, her tone hateful and resentful of the stallion. I didn't say a word as I walked up to the final headstone. Applejack stepped back with a deep sigh of regret. “Ah'm so sorry about all this... ah truly am... ah... if yah ever want, yer welcome tah the farm, always... yer family tah me, yah know?” she asked but I didn't answer as I fell to my knees in front of the final grave, nopony else but myself knowing who it belonged to.

“Ah'll just... leave yah tah yerself...” she whispered before trotting away. I could feel the cool wind brushing by. My body... my soul... everything seemed so empty. Some of Lassie's final words came to me.

My fist clenched and a single metallic blade emerged. I began to etch a few simple words into the headstone as I made one final promise, one I intended on keeping for her sake. 'Lassie... I won't forget...'

Author's Note

Bud-dum-tssh! Good goddess man. That hurt to write. And no, I won't change my mind about it and rewrite it. Jeez, Lassie was... ugh, I feel so hurt about it. Anywho, sorry about the delay. I had... issues that I'll write about in a blog tomorrow. I honestly didn't know if I'd be able to finish this story after everything that was happening but... well,
I'm back... hahahaha, sorry. Anywho, the next chapter will be the finale, but I may opt to break it into two separate chapters, not sure yet so don't keep me to my word about it.
Cheers everyone

Finale

Author's Note

I dunno who all will be left to read this but I'm sorry for the... 3 some year hiatus. I was... away, and it's a long story I don't really like to delve into unless someone really badly wants to know. But anyways, I'm back

Finale

'It's over, time to let go...'

Evan's Perspective:

I felt her muzzle nestle into my neck, making me giggle gingerly as she tickled me. My eyes were closed but I could still sense all of my surroundings perfectly as if they were open. The brisk fresh morning air, the ponies all bustling by...

“Get a room!” I heard Dash laugh out from on board the train, “Come on, you're gonna miss the train.” My right eye opened slowly, taking in the scenery as I turned to Twilight with a soft smile, her returning it.

“Alright remember, feed her from the bottle every-” I cut her short.

“I know, I know. Every couple of hours, make sure it's warm but not too warm or she'll get a tummy cramp. Baby food only three times a day, no matter how much she wants more,” I replied with a smile. “We'll be fine, I promise.” I gave Twilight a kiss on the cheek.

“Okay... it's just that you've never been alone without me this-” she was cut off by the conductor's voice.

“Last call! LAST CALL EVERYPONY!” He yelled out.

I looked to her with a smile. “We got this, right Spike?” I asked the young dragon beside me. He looked to me with a stunned look.

“Whoa, don't drag me down with you man. I'm strong, but not 'that' strong,” he mentioned, making me chuckle. I wasn't exactly sure how, but our child had an immense amount of strength, going so far as to lift the side of the couch when she loses something under it.

“Okay, I have to go. Be good you two,” she gave me one final kiss before looking to Spike. “Watch over them,” she told him, making me frown. “I'll be back in a few days.”

Spike and I watched as Twilight boarded the train, waving one final goodbye. I cradled our child in my arms as we watched the train depart. After a few minutes passed, Spike and I made our way back home.

“So...” Spike trailed off.

“So?” I asked back.

“What's for lunch?” he asked curiously, making me chuckle.

“Awwww, you're going to make me watch the kid 'AND' cook?” I laughed jokingly. “Well I can already see how this week is going to end up.” I brushed against him teasingly and he pushed back with a laugh.

Holding my child with one arm, I rubbed my grey stubble with my free hand. “Well, I mean... we could have-” I cut myself short as my nose twitched. We stopped in front of Sugarcube Corner, my stomach grumbling from the smell of fresh pastries.

It was at this point that my daughter awoke, rubbing her eyes with a yawn. Her eyes fluttered awake and she looked up to me with eyes that could melt a cold heart. Her nose twitched however and she too looked to Sugarcube Corner. Her front hooves reached out, trying to grab at it adorably.

“No,” Spike spoke up, shaking one of his claws in a disapproving way. My stomach grumbled.

“Maybe just one?” I asked, giving a pouty face. Spike shook his head.

“Gosh, you know what happens when she has sugar,” he replied and I widened my eyes further, my lip pouting. “Lassie could do that...” he trailed off, cutting himself short, my expression of pout fading quickly at the mention of her name. “I'm sorry, I-” I cut him off with a wave.

“No, it's alright. I... it's not your fault,” I told him before perking a smile. “Come on. Let's go make like fifty grilled cheese and eat till were fat,” I laughed off my emotional turmoil like it was nothing, making Spike chuckle.

“You have the appearance of an elderly pony but the attitude of somepony in their twenties,” he laughed, the two of us making our way back home...

* * *

I let out a partially held back burp as I patted my stomach with a sigh. Letting out a sigh, I wiped my mouth with a napkin. My child sat in her booster seat, making a mess with her baby food.

Twilight and I used to try and feed her ourselves with a spoon so she wouldn't make such a mess, but sometimes she'd grip our arm so tight she'd nearly break bone while trying to get ahold of the food.

We just decided it would be better, and safer, to just let her her make a mess. It was ungoddessly strange how powerful she was at such a young age. Spike leaned back, wiping the ketchup from the side of his lip.

There was a loud burp that came from my child, one so fierce her lips jiggled a little like Homer Simpson. It made both Spike and I laugh, a little uncontrollably if I might add. This of course made my daughter laugh and clap, burping again so that we'd keep laughing. The laughter died down shortly after as Spike and I sighed contently.

“That was good,” Spike mentioned under his breath. My daughter looked over to the counter and spotted my box of Twinkies that I had from back on my world. They were ancient, well, old anyway. But Twinkies never went bad. She reached out as though her forelegs would just extend to grab them. She made some baby noises to get our attention drawn to the pastries.

“Uhhh... no sweetheart. That's not the best idea,” I told her. She seemed to understand because she gave me a very pouty face. “Awww, don't be like that.” Her eyes widened and started to swell with moisture. The look was just too adorable. “Oh... maybe just-” Spike cut me off.

“Remember when she got into Pinkie Pie's cookie jar?” the young dragon inquired, bringing back memories from just a month ago...

When I had tried to pick her up she literally just tossed me aside like a twig or piece of debris.

Even Big Mac and Spike were thrown around, and that's when it kicked in. The sugar rush. She was nearly moving faster than Pinkie Pie could. Just as all hope seemed lost and our get-together seemed ruined, Twilight shook a baby rattle, stopping all the chaos.

Our child made a few baby noises before crawling over to her. Twilight picked her up and carried her up for a nap while the rest of us tended to our injuries...

The flashback faded and I chuckled. “Oh... oh yeah... maybe it's not a good idea. Sorry sweetie, no sweets for you. You're already sweet enough,” I told her, to which she began to bawl. “Aww, no, don't cry...” I trailed off, standing and picking her up out of her foal-seat as I tried rock her back and forth. It was no use, she went into full tantrum mode, beating her hooves off my chest and nearly knocking me to the ground.

“Jeez, nap time for you huh?” I asked. She had already had a nap today but...

I walked up the stairs, cradling her in my arms as I rocked her, whispering a soothing melody to her. Ever so softly she came down from her fit of foalish rage while I gave her a pacifier. She suckled on it quite intensely but quickly succumbed to her exhaustion and passed out. Setting her down in her crib, I smiled with a sense of genuine love and care.

I let out a deep exhale before leaning down to plant a kiss on her forehead. “I love you sweetie,” I whispered before standing straight up with a slight grunt. “Sheesh, you could be more gentle though,” I muttered, rubbing my chest where she had pounded me.

Twinkies, mass strength... she definitely took a few things after her father, that was for sure. I went back downstairs and to the kitchen to help clean up, rubbing my now sore chest ever so gingerly.

“Do you think you can actually handle this for a week?” Spike asked and I went wide eyed as I let out another deep exhale.

“Oh yeah... I mean, probably... how hard can it be?” I replied, Spike perking a brow.

“It's only been an hour an a half,” he responded, making my whole body deflate a little. “And Twilight's not here. Somehow, she never gets hurt by her,” he mentioned and I nodded.

“I know, it's like she has a way with the beast,” I joked with a short laugh which Spike joined in on. For the next few minutes we finished cleaning up the kitchen until it was spotless once again.

I turned to Spike before stretching out my back. “So... wanna stretch out and do some exercises?” I asked. With how my body had aged so rapidly, it didn't take long for Spike to outpace me in strength. It made me proud to see how far the young dragon had come. That didn't mean however, that I stopped altogether, just not as hardcore as I used to be.

He shook his head. “Sorry, I actually have plans with Sweetie Belle. Speaking of which... do you mind if I take Cadance?” he asked, making me chuckle.

“Well hold on there mister... hold on. You can't go nowhere until you put new oil in her,” I told him, Spike perking a brow.

“But the stick thingy says there's enough oil in it,” he replied, to which I smirked.

“Nah, that's not what I meant. Come on, Hotshot, I'll show you.” We walked outside and to the side of the library where my old '97 F250 resided. “Now,” I grunted as I pulled over some cardboard to lay on along with a drain pan. “Every... oh jeez, about seven thousand kilometers, you need to change the oil,” I told him, starting to go through the routine.

“I picked up the oil earlier, knowing I'd need to do it. But if there's none around here, just go ask Flim and Flam. They've worked on this truck almost more than I have so they'll have anything you need, or know whatever it is you need to know, fix whatever you need to fix... you get the idea,” I told him, Spike nodding as I slid underneath my old girl.

“Now, I'll do it just this once for you, that way you don't get all mucky before you're big fancy date,” I laughed, making Spike blush. “But if you're gonna be driving her around on a regular basis, you're gonna need to learn how to do the regular maintenance on her as well. I won't be around forever to show you...” I mentioned, going silent after the last part. Spike just looked to me with a gloomy look. “I didn't mean... I'm sorry, I know you and Twilight-” he cut me short with a nod.

“I know. You're body it's... it's old,” he replied. Him saying that felt like a kick in the gut. I nodded then shrugged.

“Hey, don't worry. I've still got a lot of kick left in me and I can still teach you some pretty cool stuff. Promise,” I said in a perky voice, smirking. He nodded as I started to drain the oil, showing him step by step the process of a proper oil change on my old girl.

As I removed the oil filter, a spurt of oil spilled down on me. “Ahhh... for buck sakes...” I cursed, dropping the filter into the drain pan, which resulted in a splash of oil landing on me. “For fu... ughh,” I grumbled, Spike chuckling.

“You sure that's the proper way of doing it? Looks a little messy,” he remarked, to which I shot him a stupid look.

“This is why I offered to do it for you. Be thankful...” I laughed to myself as I laid my head back down, warm oil tainting my hands and once clean shirt. 'Oh well,' I thought to myself, 'At least the back side is still clean.'

I finished my tutorial with Spike, cleaning up the mess on the ground before handing him the keys. “Thanks Evan, it means a lot,” he told me before going to give me a hug. I put a hand out to stop him.

“Woah kiddo. I did it so you wouldn't get dirty...” I told him. The young dragon gave me a once over, realizing that a hug from me would result in him getting covered in oil as well. “Now go on. Go have fun with your fillyfriend,” I gave him a wink. He gave me a happy nod and shortly there after was gone in my truck. Not so long ago I would have never let anypony, anyone drive that truck. 'Oh, how times have changed,' I thought with a gruff exhale.

Just before heading back inside, I head a chipper voice call out. “Evan, wait up!” the voice shouted. I turned and saw Derpy bolting towards me. My eyes went wide.

“Derpy! NO WAIT!” I yelled out but it was far to late. She crashed into me joyfully, letting out a thrilled laugh as she nuzzled her head into my chest, having knocked me flat to the ground. Used to be I could catch her and remain standing, barely moving an inch.

She stopped for a minute to inspect herself, realizing there was a warm, icky dampness stuck to her now. “Yuck... what is this stuff... oh Evan, it's all over you to... I didn't do that to you, did I?” she asked and I chuckled as we both stood up.

“No, no. I was trying to warn you. I'm covered in motor oil.” The back side of my shirt was dirty now too.

“Oh, it's so great to see you. It's been so long!” She chimed. I rose a brow as the mailpony started rummaging through her sack.

“It's only been three days since we last saw each other,” I commented as she pulled out a mouthful of mail, most of it now covered in slobber. That was fine by me though. I took the mail from her and went through it.

“I know,” she replied to my comment. “But for me, that's wayyy too long to see my bestest friend,” she responded back, making my heart flutter a bit as she gave me another hug. “We should hang out sometime and do something fun soon!” I looked into her crisscrossed eyes and nodded.

“Sure thing Derpy. I'd like that, when you're not busy with work though, okay?” I told her and she nodded before scooting off in a random direction. As I walked back into the tree house, I sorted through the mail before tossing it on the table and heading for a shower.

The shower was nice, relaxing, refreshing... just what I needed. Hoping out, I quickly slipped on some new pants and a shirt. The shower was relieving, making it seem like the weight of everything had been lifted off my shoulders, at least for now... or maybe that was due to the fact my daughter was having a nap.

I quickly checked on her crib, noting that she was fast asleep, before heading up to the balcony. Sitting down with my legs crossed, I placed one hand into the palm of the other, resting both into my lap as I let the warm noon air breeze into me. Celestia's sun beamed down it's wonderful aura and I basked in it, letting my eyes close.

I let my mind slip, focusing on nothing yet even so, everything in the world came into focus. My body remained almost entirely still, only my chest heaving up and down with each breath. In through the nose, out through the mouth.

Despite my near perfect style of relaxation and peace, despite all the meditation, the months of training with Twilight... I still couldn't wrap my head around the concept of levitation spells. It was one of the only spells that I couldn't handle. Other more advanced, even seemingly impossible spells, I managed with ease. Some even shocked Celestia and Luna, like the time I accidentally teleported myself into the bathhouse while they were washing. Goddess alive that was embarrassing. Twilight had only started to instruct me on how to perform the spell, not how to direct it, which ended with me teleporting to a random place.

This time though, all I was doing was finding my inner peace. I continued to just let my mind slip further and further into the abyss. All my angers, my hatreds, every negative thought, just started to disappear.

This was one of the original therapeutic meditations I learned while I proved to myself that Twilight was not my mother. It was a semi-lengthy process and I was thankful that over all this time, that Twilight had put up with my attitude and ridiculous ways. In the end, what had happened was that my mind had coaxed me in to believing she was my mother in a way to cope with my childhood trauma involving my real mother. But now all that was gone. No anger, no hatred... just a deep sense of longing.

Some time must have passed because I was suddenly awoken when there was a nuzzling at my side. “Oh... hey there sweetheart. I didn't even hear you wake up,” I told her as I stood up, picking her up into my arms and carrying her downstairs with me.

As I walked passed her crib however, I noticed it was completely demolished. “Ugh...” I groaned in disdain, making my daughter laugh uncontrollably. “No, not funny,” I scolded her lightly. She looked at me with a puzzled look as I rolled my eye, the other being covered by the eye patch.

Walking into the kitchen to grab a banana, she started to reach over my shoulders to try and grab the box of Twinkies, making noises to try and draw my attention to them. “No,” I told her as I grabbed a banana. “Do you want a nana instead?” I offered but she gave a grossed out look, sticking out her tongue. “Figures... what else do we...” I trailed off as I looked into the fridge, finding a big mason jar labeled 'Baby can eat'.

“Oh hey, look at this. Auntie Jackie made you some applesauce,” I informed her, a bright smile spreading across her face as she started clapping in excitement. Sometimes, more often than not, when she ate, I would swear she was from the Apple family. She loved apples, and I mean 'loved' them.

I set her down in her booster seat, the mason jar in the middle of the table before going to grab her a bowl and spoon. Grabbing a fair sized bowl and spoon, I turned around to head back to the table. I paused in disbelief as the spoon and bowl fell from my hands, hitting the floor with a 'CLACK'. In the short time, maybe thirty seconds that I had turned my back, she had crawled up onto the table, opened the mason jar of applesauce and ate it all. Actually, judging by how it was splashed all over her cheeks, she probably chugged it. Now I wondered if she was related to Pinkie.

“Oh...” I trailed off, my daughter giggling and laughing before licking it off her cheeks in a cartoonish way. “Well then...” I trailed off before cleaning the mess and bringing her into the living room. “Okay yah little gremlin,” I joked while pulling out some lettered building blocks, pouring them on the ground for her to play with.

As she went about building, I pulled out an Equestrian bible. I wasn't exactly sure, but somehow I had lost my bible from Earth. It just disappeared one day. The Equestrian style bible was far different from the earth one too. There was far less dark themes in it. No brimstone and fire, everlasting torment in hell, or any of that. There was mention of a place called Tartarus which was the pony equivalent of hell I reckoned.

I went through a couple of verses before saying my prayer to their lord. Setting the bible aside, I grabbed the newspaper Derpy had brought with the mail and went about the crossword. Putting on some reading glasses, I sat there for maybe an hour, stumped on a couple of harder words. Before long, I heard my daughter make some adorable baby sounds. Lowering the paper, I looked to the blocks she had placed together. She had spelled the word 'ASTROLOGICAL'. I blinked before setting the paper down, looking to her with a nod.

“You're your mother's daughter, you know that?” I asked with a laugh, the foal laughing in return before covering her eyes with her front hooves. I let out a gasp. “Oh no, where's the baby, she disappeared!” I said in freight. She let out a laugh before 'reappearing'. “There she is!” I said in relief, picking her up. She put her one hoof over my good eye. “Uh-oh! Somepony turned off the lights! I can't see!” I proclaimed. She giggled wildly before taking her hoof away.

“Oh, whew! I was so afraid,” I told her. She giggled while grabbing my hands and raising them to my face. “Oh, it's time for Daddy to disappear?” I asked, my daughter nodding. I placed my hands over my face before activating an invisibility spell. She let out a gasp, having never seen that before. “Where's daddy?” I asked aloud before actually reappearing in front of her, hands off my face. “There he is!” I laughed, making her cackle wildly in fascination. Clapping her hooves, she quickly reached over to pull my hands back up to my face.

“Again?” I asked, her nodding. “Okay...” I trailed off, putting my hands over my face. “Where's daddy?” I asked, turning invisible once again. This time I waited just a bit longer before reappearing. “There he-” I cut myself off as I realized she was no longer in front of me on the couch.

“Sweetie?” I asked, quickly standing up and checking under the cushions. “Sweetheart?!” I asked aloud, checking around the living room before heaving the couch up entirely off the ground. “Honey?!” I called out, worried that maybe I had misused the spell and turned her invisible instead...

* * *

Third person...

“Where's daddy?” the man asked. The foal giggled before promptly hopping off the couch and hiding in a small foal sized cardboard box. “There he-” the man cut himself off. As he started to frantically look around the living room for her, she ever so sneakily made her way to the kitchen, hidden from sight in the cardboard box.

As she reached the kitchen, she shed the box and looked up to the counter top where her prize lay. Looking around, she crawled over to the side of the counter and pulled out the bottom draw to it's maximum draw length, the drawer above it only halfway and the top drawer only partially out.

With this done, she simply used the opened drawers like a set of stairs, albeit unstable stairs. Reaching the top, she crawled over to the box of Twinkies with an ever widening smile. They were hers, finally. Grabbing the box, she went to dump them out but found the box unopened. Fidgeting with it for a moment, she quickly got irritated and bit onto the box then began shaking it like a wild animal.

The box's structure gave way and she quickly got it open. Stripping open the plastic wraps, she quickly indulged into all the pastries at once just as Evan entered the kitchen. “Ba-” he cut himself off in utter horror as he saw her eating the last Twinkie. “Uh-oh...” was all he managed...

* * *

One and a half hours later...

“Sweetheart... please...” Evan gasped, bruised slightly from the ordeal and with a split lip that bled slightly. The library was now a complete mess and an utter right off. The foal's entire body seemed to vibrate with energy, her pupils shrunk to a near pinhole size. Just before she went to terrorize the house more, she suddenly let out a deep exhale, her body seeming to deflate.

She slumped over with a yawn as Evan let out a relieved exhale. “Sugar crash, phew...” he muttered. Gently picking the baby up, he shook his head in utter dismay as he looked to the mess while walking up the stairs.

He stopped at her crib with a groan. “Ugh...” he grunted, remembering at this very moment she had decimated it during her escape earlier. “Well... guess you get the bed, huh?” he mentioned as he went to the main bedroom and tucked her into bed for the time being. “Seesh, how many times do you sleep in a day?” he asked aloud before heading back downstairs to clean the torrential mess...

* * *

Evan's perspective:

I let out a deep exhale as I flumped down on the couch. This... this was a huge mess. Spike was right, and I didn't even give her sugar, she had just taken it all on her own. I leaned back, flipping off my eye patch as I relaxed. Flicking on the radio that Spike had gotten me for Hearth's warming all that time ago, I let myself drift away in the music...

As I dozed, I dreampt of days passed. In the early days of my life in Equestria I had been a nearly unequaled titan of raw strength, usually slamming my power around to accomplish whatever it was that needed to be done, but about as thick headed as they came.

In the years since, I had evolved, changing my ways. I had learned to love, be loved, make friends, show emotions, listen... and with the help and support of my friends I even pushed passed my mother issues.

Now however, with my body aged, I was fairly feeble compared to my once hulking size. No longer were the days of throwing around my weight to accomplish things. Oh well, I suppose you can't have everything...

My dreams continued as I thought back to my dog on Earth, Ally. I wondered how she was. A tear dripped from my eye. The day I had left I had told her I'd be back that night to take her on a walk. I wondered if she still waited for me, never to return. The tears fell into a darkness that started to surround my feet.

I thought to my brother, wondering what ever became of him, and how he was doing in life. My grandmother and grandfather, even wondering if my real mother would even bother wondering what happened to me.

My thoughts drifted on to the farm where I had worked, wondering if my boss would wonder where I had disappeared to. The farm would've been the last place I had ever been seen, my boss being the last human on Earth to have ever saw me.

In my dream I closed my eyes, thinking back to all the adventures I had with Derpy, escaping from the hospital on several occasions, or when I had brought her muffins while she was hospitalized. The destruction I had caused in Manehatten searching for Derpy when the mob foalnapped her.

My adventures with Daring Do. Where I had first met her in those caverns while she looked for Peg Leg's gold and I had gotten lost with misdirection. When we had climbed Mount Tia and both nearly perished.

Echo Jewel, how we had traveled with her on a mission of revenge... and Derreck had impregnated her with a child...

The spell induced coma I had been in with Derreck and Luna where we had fought through the Eastern front of the second world war, albeit all just a dream.

Twilight and her friends, all the days we had spent in the sun, or even in the rain. Hearth's Warming, where I had staved off the cold to try and find her a present, only to stumble upon Hearth... or maybe that was a dream too.

The time spent with Nightmare Moon on Burdick Estate, along with Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo who constantly came to visit. Our butler Alfred.

The first time I worked for Applejack and subsequently met Flim and Flam who refueled my truck for me. Our relationship, and how it transpired. Their desert garage.

My heart skipped a beat as I thought to Lassie. The first time I had met her at Fluttershy's cabin. How we had taken her in. How we used to smuggle her into fancy restaurants. How Twilight and I would take her out on our romantic outings. How, even before she could speak, she was trying to court us both together... the first time she did speak and how I had fainted. When her, Discord and I traveled to Baltimare to stop Coldmare, or Freeze as she liked to be called.

How we had to go save Lassie later on when she was kidnapped by her so called parents, the fake mother actually turning out to be quite loving and sacrificing herself for Lassie...

'Lassie...' I could hear my own thoughts, like an echo in a tunnel. Recurring flashbacks of her death began to continuously to play over and over in my head. I tried harder and harder every time to save her but every time I felt like I was failing worse and worse.

The world around me turned darker, quieter. Tears dripped from my eyes but continued to fall endlessly into the never ending abyss of darkness beneath me.

Through all the silence I could hear a soft clip-clopping coming closer and closer to me. I looked up, still on my hands and knees, crying in my failure. A figure dressed in all black robes approached me, scythe in tow.

I looked on to him with a pale expression. Usually one would be terrified of death. “So that's it then?” I asked. “The 'Life flashes before your eyes before you die'? That was it?” I asked him. I could see two faint red glowing pupils deep within the confines of his cloak's hood.

“You should be thankful. Not many ponies get the privilege of dying peacefully in their sleep,” he told me. His front bony hooves slid out from the confines of his cloak, grabbing me by the neck as he stood to his hind legs, hoisting me off the ground.

Instinctively, my hands grabbed at his hooves but I didn't resist. There was nothing I could do. This was Death after all. I felt my world start to fade, everything going vague. My skin began to go pale.

However, ever so faintly, I heard a nearly feral, most animalistic, roar of anger. Death was plowed into by a massive force that sent him hurtling away, Death's body skipping across the ground. “I don't think so!” came an ever familiar voice. “Nopony kills Evan but me. Destiny has reserved that pleasure for yours truly,” he remarked, pointing his thumb at himself.

I felt my vision return just before he grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and hoisted me to my feet. “Look at you! What a pathetic slob of a mess!” he boomed in my face. “Fight back for Celestia's sake!” he roared at me as Death was staggering to his hooves.

“Derreck, there's no point, it's Death-” he cut me off with a slap across the face.

“No point? NO POINT?!” he roared out, slapping me again. “Perhaps it should have been me to survive and you to perish!” he boomed. “You have a child, a lover, friends, family!” he roared in my face.

“It's Death, Derreck, you can't-” he again cut me off, this time with a punch to the gut while at the same time letting me fall to the ground, gasping for air.

“IT'S A NAME!” He roared out in terrifying echo. “THE NAMESAKE IS MEANINGLESS IF THE OWNER DOESN'T LIVE UP TO IT!” He boomed, arms cocked at his side. The ground beneath us began to shake as he let out an even more ground shattering roar. I felt gusts of wind pushing against me with incredible force. The darkness beneath Derreck began to crack, splitting open and revealing a hellish red glow.

The hood on Death's cloak had been blown back, his bony foreleg placed in front of his skull to protect himself from debris. Derreck continued to roar wildly, muscles beginning to swell and grow significantly larger.

A blood red aura quickly surrounded him, gusting outwards with even more torrential force then the powerful winds. His iris turned a deep hue of red while veins bulged from his forehead. His pure, unrelenting rage continued, static electricity began to crackle all around him.

“Know this!” He stared at me with great fury that struck a deep fear into me. “When the time arises, I am going to kill you. And believe me, that time is coming soon!” he told me, making me gulp. He let out one final roar of power before finally settling, if you could call it that. His muscles were swelled, bulged... I could feel his intense power from here. Red currents of electricity still crackled and sizzled through the air around him.

“My name... Derreck... It means 'gifted ruler of all'. And I intend to live up to that namesake. Him?!” he shouted, pointing his index finger to Death. A tiny red glint sparkled off the tip of his finger before a thin beam shot out, piercing through the chest of Death. “He could never live up to his namesake against someone like me!” he shouted. Death began to gasp and wheeze as his skeletal body began to crumble apart, turning to dust.

“Ashes to ashes... dust to dust... and I'll throw your dust into the wind!” he shouted at Death who quickly fell into a heaping pile. “You see?! A meaningful namesake given to a weakling! Just like you! Learn the meaning of your name and live up to it!” he roared at me, stepping forwards. I stood up, spitting blood from my mouth. “And then... and then we can have our epic battle!”

* * *

Third person...

The foal woke up with a yawn, clucking her tongue several times as she looked around. The upstairs quarters were dimly lit but the light coming from the main floor was slightly brighter, though still fairly dim itself.

Hearing her father's distressed grunts, she hopped off the bed from which she lay and crawled over to the stairway's edge. Looking down, she saw her father, huffing and exhaling, mumbling things in great distress as he twitched and twisted in his sleep, suffering from a horrific night terror.

Not having the equilibrium or proper height, the foal turned her rear to the stairs and descended backwards to the main floor before making her way to the couch. She looked to her father in a most curious way as he struggled, muttering something under his breath she couldn't understand.

His breathing was heavy, raspy, sounding much like he was struggling to breathe. Crawling up onto the couch, the young filly foal slipped her body up underneath one of the man's arms, nestling herself into his chest. Almost instantly the man stopped, his breathing slowing, his heart rate returning to a much more docile pace. He wiggled a little before finally relaxing with a deep exhale.

The little filly closed her eyes and started to rest as well but only managed a few minutes of sleep before she was awoken by a most dreadful noise. Her father snorted a bit and began to snore loudly.

Letting out a huff, the filly squirmed out from beneath his arm and made her way to the kitchen. Opening the fridge, she pulled out a bottle of breast milk left by her mother. Ascending up the counter much like she had to get the Twinkies earlier, she grabbed a coffee cup and poured herself a glass before setting the cup in the microwave and warming it to just the right temperature.

Her father continued to snore loudly as the microwave beeped, indicating the designated time had concluded. Taking out her coffee cup of breast milk, she sat at the edge of the counter, hindlegs dangling down off the edge as she sipped on her beverage, the sound of her father's snoring ever present.

Finishing off the rest of the milk, she set the cup aside before grabbing a clothespin. Hopping off the counter with the bottle of breast milk in tow, she set the milk back into the fridge before heading into the living room, looking to her father who just kept snoring and snoring... and snoring...

She shook her head, hopping up onto his chest and clipping the clothespin to his nose, shutting it down as an airway. He snorted and jerked a bit before rolling over. The filly took the clothespin back off her father's nose and he began to snooze peacefully again.

Tucking herself back under his arm, the filly quickly dozed off...

* * *

Spike scurried into the tree house, inhaling one deep breath as he struggled to get the door shut, intensely powerful and cold winds pushing back against him. Finally fighting the door shut with a slam, he exhaled deeply.

The slam woke Evan nearly immediately. “What the?!” He shot up, a little drowsy and unsure about everything.

“Crazy weather we're having, huh?” Spike asked. “Good thing Cadance has four wheel drive,” he mentioned, Evan perking a brow just as Spike looked around and saw the mess. “Goddess... I thought outside was bad. What the hay happened?” he asked. Evan let out a groan as he rubbed his eyes, waving off his question. “You gave her something with sugar, didn't you?” he inquired and the man chuckled.

“I didn't give her nuthin',” he told him. “She got into the Twinkies by her own volition... filly after her father's own heart,” Evan commented, making Spike laugh.

“I warned you,” he said back, the old man nodding as he peaked out the frosted windows and let out a groan.

“Ughhh...” Looking to the sky, he let out a huff. “You know... much as I love her, I knew leaving Derpy in charge of the weather in Ponyville while Dash was away would be a bad idea,” he mentioned. Turning back to the living room, he let out a groan. “I guess while we're still up, we should try and clean this place, huh?” he asked, Spike stifling a laugh...

* * *

Evan's perspective...

Setting away some more books, my attention was drawn to Spike, who piped up with a question. “Hey, how'd a breadbox get in the living room?” he asked, holding up the green box.

“You don't wanna know,” I chuckled, making him laugh.

“Anything else I don't wanna know?” he snickered as he made his way to the kitchen to put it away. I continued to put away books and toys. A moment had passed when suddenly the door was whipped open, followed by a wicked gust of icy cold wind and snow. I turned to the doorway but had to cover my face with my arms to block the snow blustering into my eye.

A moment passed and I lowered my arms, my heart stopping for just a moment as one single name left my mouth in such a whispered and frightened tone, even I couldn't hear it.

“Freeze...”

“Ah-ha, so you do remember me. I thought after all this time you might have forgotten,” she replied cynically. I began to circle my way around the room so that I had positioned myself between her and the couch, where my baby daughter still rested.

A voice came from the kitchen, getting closer with each word. “Jeez... Evan close the...” Spike trailed off as he stepped into the archway between the living room and kitchen. “Uhhh?” he asked in slight confusion.

I quickly held out my hand without looking to him. “Spike, get back in the kitchen,” I ordered in a sharp voice. Freeze laughed.

“No Spike, come join in the festivities. We were just about to have a real 'blast',” she quipped, slowly slinging down her freeze cannon from her back. I waved my hand for Spike to move back.

“Spike, seriously... get... back,” I told him slowly. Freeze slowly took her cannon into a more combative pose.

Freeze spoke up in a sinister tone. “Now... how about we all just... FREEZE!” she punned just before letting loose with her canon. Hurtling backwards, I flipped the couch with one hand whilst grabbing my child with the other, only praying that Spike heeded my warning. Ice spewed across the room, turning the other side of the couch to pure ice.

The sudden drama had woken my child up and had her in complete tears, her screaming more audible than the gusting winds coming through the door. “Aww, isn't that cute,” Freeze cynically began. “Father and child, fro-” she was cut short as a deafening gunshot went off inside the home, ringing my ears and making my daughter scream even louder.

“ENOUGH!” Spike roared, in a stunningly terrifying way. I would've never thought him to be capable of that. I looked to him, standing in the kitchen archway, Belladonna drew in an Isosceles stance.

I quickly set my child down and hopped between them. “NO!” I roared. “Please... no... don't, either of you.” I turned to Freeze. “Whatever this is, however you came back... we can settle things between us, just please, leave them out of it,” I pleaded with her before turning to Spike.

“Spike... I've taught you a great many things, but killing a pony... nopony can teach you that... and believe me Spike... please goddess believe me, it's not something you want to know,” I begged him. Spike kept his aim true at Freeze which had her frozen in spot. She knew what Belladonna was, what she could do.

“Spike... please... lower the gun. You don't want to do this,” I spoke in an easing tone. Ever so slowly, he began to lower the gun. A squeaking foalish noise came from behind the couch as my daughter began to crawl out.

Freeze let out a shrilled cackle as she leveled the cannon at her. “But I do!” She laughed. I let out a roar as I charged into Freeze, just as Spike rose Belladonna back up and let off a wild shot. The brilliant muzzle flash lit up the entire room, light cascading out the windows for just a brief moment.

KA-BOOM

I tackled into Freeze and took her to the ground, hitting the floor with an audible 'THUMP' that knocked the wind out of both of us.

I groaned in agonizing pain, gripping the side of my ribs. Frig that hurt. I was really feeling my age. Freeze quickly got up, bringing her cannon up as well but noticing the shot had damaged her weapon. Letting out a huff, she said a few last words. “Well, looks like we'll just have to do this the old fashion way.”

Her horn began to flash, swirls of snow blustering around in the room. Spike was quickly blinded and had to cover his face as Freeze cackled. Just then everything seemed to stop and a thin yellow beam of energy shot through her chest from behind her. Freeze coughed and wheezed before falling to the ground, lifeless.

“I killed you once before,” came a voice as everything started to thaw out. I groaned and rolled over, quickly getting to my feet and scurrying over to retrieve my daughter, who was at this point just bawling.

“Discord!” Spike gasped, lowering the handcannon. The draconequus nodding in response as he rose his still smoking finger and blew away the vapors. He looked to me as I rocked my child back and forth.

“This is madness!” Discord mentioned and I nodded. “First Sombra, now her,” he mentioned and I rose a brow.

“Wait... what?!” Spike questioned. Discord rose his brow.

“Haven't you heard. Chaos is spreading all across Equestria. And it isn't even my chaos!” he informed and I went to ask but a tremor in the floor shook us violently, like a massive seismic earthquake.

We all rushed to the door where, in the far off distance, we saw a massive beam of red light shoot up towards the night sky. “What... the... buck...” I muttered under my breath, Spike beginning to panic.

“Oh sweet Celestia... not good... this is not good,” he stammered. I felt my heart skip a beat before swallowing deeply. Without even turning to him, I spoke.

“Discord,” I said, giving my child one last kiss to the forehead. “Take her and Spike somewhere safe,” I said, still looking to the massive red beam that skyrocketed towards the sky. I handed her over and Discord took her gently, the filly laughing uncontrollably from his funny appearance.

“But Evan, you're-” I quickly cut him short.

“I be fine,” I told him sternly.

“But-” I shot him a glare.

“DISCORD! Right now the most important thing is that my daughter and Spike are somewhere safe... please, bring them... Fluttershy's cabin, or my old estate. I don't care. Somewhere where nothing can hurt them,” I told him. He paused for a great long time before finally nodding.

“A-alright. If that's what you want, I'll make sure of it,” he told me and I nodded before turning to Spike and leaning down for a hug.

“Spike, be good, alright?” I asked and he nodded as I stood back up and looked to Discord. “Thank you for everything, my old friend,” I smiled to him and he nodded before placing his claw hand on my shoulder.

“Of course... this time, I've got your back,” he told me and I nodded. Just before he could step back, I stopped him.

“Wait,” I told him. Quickly, I slipped off my ring and looped it with some lace before placing it around my daughters neck. “I'll always be with you,” I told her before nodding to Discord. He took hold of Spike and in a poof of dust and glittery sparkles they were gone. I knew with Discord they'd be safe as houses.

I groaned in pain as I went down to the basement, quickly changing. Slipping on my old camouflage cargo pants, I put on a fresh shirt that was quickly soiled. I took a deep breath, slipping on my old camouflage jacket to match my pants. The clothes I wore when I first arrived. Slipping on the holy necklace around my neck, I slipped on my leg holster for Belladonna and put her where she belonged. It would end just like it began.

A shiver went down my spine as I went back up the stairs and out the front door, closing it behind me. I made my way over to Cadance. She'd be the only way I'd make in tim-

My body was plowed into the ground by a speedy blue blitz, followed by cackling laughter. I grunted as I tried to bring myself to my hands and knees but felt a brutal kick hit me in the gut that sent me airborne. I hit the ground a few yards away with a pained yelp.

I could hear voices slowly approaching. “Nice kick Stratus,” said a more masculine tone.

“Yeah, I've been working on that one for a while,” replied another, equally as masculine, tone. “Gonna make this enjoyable, Charger.”

“Well, would you two lugs hurry it up. I'm freezing out here. Nopony said anything about snow!” Came a very feminine, very posh, voice.

“Aww come on Starry, don't you remember what this thing did to us?” Came the first male voice again. I managed to role over and saw four figures dressed in dark blue colored leotards. They kinda looked like Wonderbolt outfits but... darker.

The one with frazzled hair that had electric currents running through it spoke up in a jittery tone. “Yeah-yeah! He totally blew my head of, like, PCK-KOW!” She made the motion like her head was exploding. I quickly drew out Belladonna, drawing a sight on the fritzy one.

Like a lightning bolt, she slammed into me, knocking Belladonna clean out of my grip. Grabbing the gun with her mouth, she spoke in a garbled voice. “Ahph. Wih dis ting!” She mentioned just before the gun went off, the recoil knocking the gun clean out of her mouth. “WOAH THAT WAS CLOSE!” She exclaimed before casually picking the gun up in her mouth again.

I went to stand but the gray one with the scar on his lip charged forwards and booted me another few yards back, hitting my ribs extra hard and making me cough up blood that spoiled the fresh virgin snow. “Oh... oh yeah, I'm going to enjoy this!” he laughed whilst making his way towards me in a menacing way.

Just as he was within a few feet of me, a streaking blur blustered down, knocking the big stallion to the ground with enough force to send him skidding through the snow. Every pony stopped in utter shock, gasping and going slack jawed.

A hoof kick mark was embedded deep into the stallion's face, splitting his lip and leaving it bleeding fairly profusely. He tilted his head to get a look at the figure who had booted him away, whom now stood before me in a defensive way. “B-boss!” the stallion gasped. “W-what are you doing?!” He stood to his hooves, spitting a glob of blood into the snow.

“This is going to sound insane... but I can't let you do this,” came a seemingly, rather vaguely, familiar voice. I wiped my eye clear to see a blue pony in similar outfit as the other ones, still poised in a defensive stance, her blue mane even darker than her fur.

“Boss, that's nuts!” said the other stallion, whom had kept his goggles on. “You can't be serious!” he demanded. The mare stepped forwards in an aggressive way.

“I am. This... this thing... it spared my life, like I was some helpless foal!” she screamed out. “And his debts... must be... repaid!” she yelled out, seemingly just as angry at me as she was towards them, though I didn't quite understand what was going on.

The gray stallion with the split lip stood tall, spitting a glob of blood between the two of them. “You're bucking delusional Shade. What? Are you two buck buddies now or something?” he insulted, blood running down his face and staining his fur. The feisty blue one, who hadn't stopped jittering this entire time, spoke up.

“Yeah Nightshade! He totally blew off my head, like-” she was cut off as Belladonna once again went off, nearly taking off her head and the gun landing just inches from my body. “Yeah, like that. It was mind blowing... literally,” she punned. That's when it clicked. These were those ponies from that one nightmare I had where I was ambushed... at least, I thought it was a dream. I had been turned to stone but woke up suddenly in my bed...

Nightshade took another step forwards. “As commander of the Shadowbolts, I'm ordering you to stand down, NOW!” she snapped. The grey one with the scarred lip stepped forwards, the others in tow. The other, much darker, stallion spoke up.

“I vote in Stratus as the new commander,” the other stallion said in a deep tone. The pink haired mare was the next to speak.

“I second that vote,” she said with a swish of her mane. The blitzy blue one continued to bounce up and down before stopping to clap her front hooves together.

“Oh-oh-ohhh, I vote me as the new boss. Me! Memememememe!” she squealed, the others looking to her with slightly annoyed looks. “Oh, I mean, I vote for Stratus too!” She looked to Nightsade and held her hoof beside her cheek, blocking the others from seeing her lips. “I still think I'd make the best boss, Boss” she said aloud so that Nightshade could hear, but thinking as though by holding her hoof like that, the others couldn't hear her.

Stratus rolled his eyes from her comment with a deep, annoyed exhale before taking another step forwards. “You heard 'em Shade. Now, as the newly appointed leader of the Shadowbolts, I'm giving you a direct order to stand down and step aside.”

Nightshade turned back to me. “Go on, get outta here. But this squares things up between us. We're even now, got it?!” she snapped and I nodded as I stood to my feet. She turned back to face the others while she spoke to me. “I've got your back. Now go on, and don't try to help me out, you'll only get in my way.”

I gave her a thankful nod before holstering my handgun and making my way towards Cadance. The stallion known as Stratus yelled out in fury. “Don't you dare turn your back to us!” he boomed, shooting towards me at great speed but was rewarded with a sharp bucking kick to his chin that flipped him back, landing on his belly whilst still skidding back. He let out a pained gasp as the other, Charger I think his name was, took his place on the offensive.

I didn't bother sticking around, Nightshade had mentioned I would only get in her way, and by the looks of it, she could handle them... I hoped. I hopped into Cadance, leaning back against the seat.

“Shit...” I muttered as I started the truck. “I'm making a bucking mess in here,” I muttered while the truck warmed up for just a moment. She'd need to be cleaned once this was all over.

Slipping her into drive, I pinned the accelerator. Normally cold starting a diesel truck then gunning it was a horrible thing to do, but right now there was a more pressing matter at hand. The truck thundered along loudly, turbocharger howling. I looked to the rear view mirror as I sped off, wishing Nightshade well. The mirrors were vibrating from the shaking power of the 7.3 Powerstroke motor but even so I could make out who was who in the battle.

I quickly sped out of town, making my way towards the Everfree Forest, where that hellish red light was coming from. As I reached the outskirts of the town's limit, the snow seemed to just disappear a few hundred yards ahead, as if it were some imaginary border. Freeze must have only spread her wrath to Ponyville as to not arise too much suspicion.

I wasn't sure how or why all this was happening but I had an assumption it was a plot against me. Both Freeze and those weird leotard dressed ponies had come after me specifically. “Why can't they all just let me retire, for buck sak-” I was cut off as a pegasus pony slammed down into the snow a few dozen yards in front of me, a ghostly white being slamming into them right after.

My foot hit the brake pedal, tires locking up as I slid towards the scene. With a wincing grimace knotted into my face, I spun the wheel, the truck spinning sideways and coming to an abrupt, skidding stop just a few feet away from the battle.

Hopping out of the truck, the ghostly white beast looked to me and my heart skipped a beat. “A Windigo?!” I gasped in a crispy tone. The beast went to let out a howl but Belladonna was up in a snap, gun bucking in my hand as I let of a quick trio of shots.

The massive 300g slugs would've torn apart it's head, had the beast been living flesh. Instead it simply vanished into a puff of snow. Rushing over, cannon in hand, I skidded to a stop as a familiar pegasi stood up. “Daring?!” I gasped, her chuckling as she brushed off her shoulder.

“Damn old man, I see age hasn't slowed you any,” she laughed. “Perfect timing too.” I blinked in complete confusion. She seemed to answer my thoughts. “I heard there was some freak storm this way and was just coming to see what all the hullabaloo was about, but-” she was cut off by a screeching from about.

Both of us looked up and saw two Windigos circling us from above, creating a vortex around us of blistering snow. “Looks like they're mad you shot their buddy,” Daring quipped and I nodded before going to line up a shot.

Wind hammered us to the ground and the shot went wild, missing completely. My body was slammed belly first into the snow. “Damn!” Was all I managed before I felt a force hammer me in the back, dragging me face first in the snow a few dozen yards before launching me.

I hit the ground, hard! My body rolled a few times before coming to a stop, myself lying on my back. I flumped my head back, Daring suddenly landing on top of me with an equally hard impact as I had hit the ground with, knocking the wind out of me. She let out a gasp as the wind was knocked out of her too. The Windigos began to circle us like vultures. Daring was wheezing for breath and I was feeling it too.

Suddenly, there was a thunderous crack in the air, like that of a whip but millions of times louder. Like something threatening to split the reality of time and space. An amazing light gray eruption of light spewed across the skies and something shot through the skies at blinding speeds. The object, or being, was a mere smear of gray light. “Shit...” I muttered as I tossed Daring off me, knowing what was too come.

No sooner had I thrown Daring off, than the object plowed into me. The ground around me cratered, blowing up a mass of dirt and snow from the impact. I coughed violently, hacking up a bit of blood and spitting it to the side. I couldn't take much more of this. Wiping my lower lip clean of blood, I looked down to see a huddling gray pony.

'Twice in one day... must be my lucky day,' I chuckled from my thoughts. “Hey Derpy... great to see you again,” I whispered, the pegasus' ears twitching from my voice and looking up.

“Evan!” she cheered, giving me a tight hug which made me wince from the pain in my ribs. Looking up though, I was relieved to see that her hyper-sonic eruption had annihilated those Windigos.

As we stood up I waved to Daring then noticed something. I couldn't hear my tru...

I turned and gasped. “CADANCE!” I yelled. The truck had been overturned from the seismic shock Derpy had caused, which also resulted in the motor shutting off. “No, no, no, no, DAMN!” I yelled, Derpy whining in repsonse.

“I'm really, really, REALLY, sorry Evan. I just don't know what went wrong,” she apologized, nearly in tears. I shook my hands.

“No, no Derpy. It's not your fault at all. In fact... heh, you kinda saved us,” I laughed, looking to Daring who rolled her eyes. “Just... ahhh...” I grunted, looking to my overturned truck. She was going to need more that just a cleaning when this was all done. Okay, well, guess I was walking.

“Damn... this sucks,” I muttered, Daring nodding as she made her way over.

“Yeah. Talk about bad weat-” She cut herself off with an all too feminine pitched gasp that sounded more like it belonged to Rarity than a super adventurer like Daring. “Evan, you're-” I cut her short.

“Yeah, I know. Don't worry about it,” I told her sternly, covering myself up.

“What do you mean don't worry about it. We need to get you to a hosp-” I cut her short.

“No. Right now, I need to go there,” I said, pointing to the big red beam thingy. “And you're not stopping me. If somepony doesn't stop this, who knows what'll happen,” I told her. Derpy was a little puzzled.

“What's wrong? Why do you need to go to the hospital?” she asked but I just shook my head.

“Don't worry about it Derpy. It's just Daring overreacting... right Daring?” I asked sternly. Derpy's ears perked.

“Daring? Like Daring Do? Like the book character?” she asked and Daring groaned, myself realizing Derpy wasn't in the loop with Daring.

“No,” Daring replied in an upset tone. “My name is Daring Ood,” she replied. Derpy cocking her head to the side as though inspecting her. “Anyway... if you won't go to the hospital, than I'm coming with you. Someone has to watch your flank, you old stubborn geezer,” Daring teased, making me roll my eyes. Derpy pipped up as well.

“Me too! I'll watch your back!” she said, bringing back memories of when her and I rescued Dash from a bunch of Timberwolves. Back then Derpy had been so panicked that I had to snap her out of it, asking if she had my back.

“A-alright... if you two insist,” I replied begrudgingly. I didn't want anypony else getting hurt in all this but they seemed pretty adamant about coming with me. We continued on and too the Everfree. The other two stayed up front just a little, by a few feet. They were a bit faster than me in my old age. I gripped my side for just a moment, applying an easing pressure to it to alleviate my pain. It still hurt, but not as much. We reached The Everfree Forest, the temperature difference here and in Ponyville were drastically different.

As we entered the Everfree, Derpy looked back to me. “Hey Evan, what do you think it is? That's causing all this?” She asked and I shook my head, taking my hand away from my side and wiping it off on my pants.

“Dunno, but whatever it is, it isn't-” I was cut off from my sentence as a Timberwolf plowed into her. “Derpy!” I roared, ramming myself into the beast. I grabbed it and threw it into the air, Daring delivering a flying buck to it that sent it flying into the woods.

I helped my gray friend to all fours. “You alright?” I asked her and she nodded before there were several howls echoing all around us. We all went back to back, Derpy pressing up against me hard then leaning away slightly.

“Evan, you're all wet on your side!?” she asked and I nodded.

“It's nothing, don't worry about it,” I told her as several Timberwolves circled us, snapping at the jaws and emitting a rather foul odor. I whispered to the others. “Okay... so you guys fly straight up... and I'm gunna plow through their line... then either climb a tree and swing like Tarzan or you two come pick me up from said tree and rescue me... okay?” I asked and they nodded.

“On three,” Daring said. Derpy spoke up, in her usual ditsy voice.

“Three!” And with that she was airborne, Daring scoffing and muttering something about how it doesn't work like that. I turned to the Timberwolves and clenched my fists. I didn't have enough ammo for all these wolves, but I did have something else up my sleeves... up my arms rather.

“Alright guys... listen, you don't wanna do this,” I told them but they kept inching closer and closer. “Maybe you do!” I snarled deeply. My body flexed and I let out a roar. The left side sprang out first, blood spurting out as the Shadow Steel encased claws erupted from between my knuckles. The right side came next but with excruciating pain that brought me to my knees.

“Gah, fuck!” I yelped out, looking to my right hand. The blade between my index and middle finger had failed to come out all the way, only coming out half. The arthritis was getting severe in my body. It's bad enough to a normal pony when your bones start to grind and weld themselves together. It's another thing when your bones are infused with indestructible Shadow Steel and you develop arthritis.

The Timberwolves took the opportunity and leapt at me, one of the bigger ones taking me to the ground. I could hear Daring's voice from up above. “Well, so much for that plan...”

The wolves took that opening and all darted towards me. The first one piled into my back, planting me face first into the dirt as it bit into my shoulder, wooden teeth gouging through my jacket and into my flesh.

I saw another one coming at me and I took a swing at it. My swing was pitiful at best and didn't even deter the beast as we began to roll around on the ground, wolves biting at me in every direction. With my age weakened strength, the razor sharp Shadow Steel claws barely had enough force to even cut the bark skin they had.

The impact of the second one flipped me to the side before more and more wolves piled onto me. One of the wolves biting at my belly got a powerful boot that sent it hurtling away but it was no use. There were at least six on me, with at least a dozen more lined up to get a piece of me.

I struggled and swung wildly but my strength didn't have enough force to drive my claws through their thick wood bodies. Suddenly there was a powerful force that hammered into the group atop of me, followed by another, just as swift, strike that knocked off all but one of the Timberwolves, the last of which kept snapping its jaws at me.

Taking a wild swing, I managed to cut it deep enough to have it jump back, yipping in pain. I staggered to my feet, Derpy and Daring covering my back. “Well... needless to say your plan went almost accordingly,” Daring quipped, making me roll my eye.

Blood dripped down the deep gash across my left cheek, and the one that went straight down the right side of my face. I think I also had a cut that went diagonally down my face, crossing paths with the one going down the right side of my face.

Blood stained my previously white shirt, my camouflage jacket a little tattered, also spoiled with blood. Several cuts bled but nothing too profuse or worrisome. “For fu... fuc...” I gasped, my lungs on fire. I spit to the side, the taste of blood slightly cleared from my mouth.

The Timberwolves had corralled us. “Alright... you guys take off. I'll... I'll handle them,” I told them through a wheeze, knowing all too well they wouldn't be able to lift me away fast enough, if at all.

“No way,” Derpy shouted over her shoulder, Daring quickly chiming in.

“Yeah, we saw how well you handled them last time,” she commented. Before I could even say anything in response, the wolves charged from all around. I charged right back, cocking my right arm for a mighty swing. Before I could swing however, one of the wolves leapt low, taking me out at the feet.

I tripped and hit the ground hard, skidding as the wolf held tight around my ankle. I tried to kick at it but quickly found myself engulfed once again with Timberwolves. I struggled, swinging and kicking about wildly.

One bit down on my arm and started dragging me a bit. I looked out and saw Daring holding her own pretty well. Her form and figure kind of reminded me of Rainbow Dash now that I looked at her. Strange I had never noticed that before.

I heard a wailing cry of pain and my attention was drawn to Derpy whom was pinned down by a Timberwolf, another about to pounce on her. The wolf grabbed her by one of her wings and started to shake its head, drawing blood.

A deep boiling rage engulfed me, my eye blazing in anger. Brows furrowed down and lips curled back, I let out a fearsome roar of anger, swinging my free arm at the wolf holding my arm. The Shadow Steel cut right through its neck, decapitating it, head rolling away lifelessly. I pivoted my weight and swung my injured arm over the opposite shoulder.

The tips of the blades found home inside the skull of another wolf which went limp almost instantly atop of me. I took a deep plunge into my very core, searching for everything I could muster before letting out another shout and throwing myself up, the wolves all flinging off my body.

In a few short strides I had reached Derpy, plowing into the wolf that stood atop of her. I took it by complete surprise, driving my claws deep into its sides. The wolf let out a shrieking howl of pain that caught the attention of all the other wolves as I lifted it high above my head then twisted my wrists outwards before pulling downwards, my claws bisecting the wolf, its two halves landing on each side of Derpy.

I spun on my heals, turning to the wolves that dared face me at this point. Daring was still occupied with three wolves, one of which she booted away before shooting straight up into the air then dive bombing towards the two others.

My brows furrowed even more as I let out a horrifying roar of hatred. Blood dripped down my arms, down my face... down just about every part of my body, but it didn't deter me in the slightest as I charged them head on.

The beasts ran towards me as well, a fatal mistake on their part. The Shadow Steel claws began to fume with some sort of mystical dark blue mist as I swung viciously, and precisely. The first wolf that leapt at me ended up sliced perfectly down the middle. The next fell to my side, headless.

One by one I chopped my way through them, bits and pieces of Timberwolf scattering the ground behind me as I kept charging. The final Timberwolf was impaled upon my claws by its underbelly before I drove it into a tree. I let out a final roar of pure rage as I began pulling my claws from its body and ramming them back into it, rotating hands used with each strike.

After what felt like eternity, but only surmounted to about ten or twelve seconds, I swung back and sliced hard with my right, decapitating it but also cutting the tree down that I had pinned it against. As the tree fell, I turned to the other wolves that still remained, the lifeless corpse I had just assaulted still stuck to my left hand claws.

Yipping in terror, the other wolves scurried off as I kicked the body off my left claws. As they ran, I hurled the lifeless corpse at one of the fleeing wolves, tripping it slightly. I was breathing heavily as I staggered over to Derpy. My left claws attempted to all retract but the middle one failed to. Finding a rock, I pushed the tip against it and ever so slowly the blade painfully retracted back to its normal spot.

I reached Derpy's side and she was grimacing while standing to her hooves. “D-Derpy...” I coughed violently, spitting blood to the side. “A-are you... you a-alright?” I wheezed and she looked to me with a petrified look.

“Evan! You're... you're...” she could barely say it but I just waved it off.

“Nah, they're just bite marks. Nothing deep. They look worse than they are,” I gave her a smile before wiping the blood clean of my face.

“B-but y-you're-” I cut her short by bringing my left hand to her mouth, which was unfortunately also covered in blood which smeared onto her fur.

“Derpy, these bites aren't gonna kill me. Don't worry,” I told her reassuringly, before looking to her wing. It look pretty chewed but not horrific or anything. Using my right hand claws, which where still extended, I cut pieces of my shirt off to make bandages for her wing. “Heh, you're in worse shape than I am Derpy,” I joked teasingly. “I'm surprised you can even stand... definitely tougher than me.” She looked back to me with a deep blush

“I-it's nothing, really,” she said modestly. I took a deep breath before grabbing my half extended claw with my left hand and pulling it out the rest of the way, the blade cutting into my palm. I let out several grunts of pain as blood began to ooze from my left hand, blood also spurting from between my knuckle where the claw was coming from.

With the claw finally extended to its fullest length, I let all three retract back into my forearm. I let out a sigh of pained relief before ripping some more of my shirt to tie around my left hand which continued to bleed.

“Jeez,” Daring muttered as she fluttered down to our side, her face pale from the mere look of my bloodied state. “I remember when you used to take on hoards of giant pony eating scorpions like they were nothing. Now a couple Timberwolves have you bloodied and gasping for air...” she remarked, making me roll my eye.

“Derpy... your wing is in pretty bad shape. Daring, can you get her to the-” we were all put in silence as a massive howl echoed throughout the forest. It wasn't one combined howl of many wolves. It was just one.

I stood to my full height as we all turned to face this new threat. My stomach sunk as one massive Timberwolf emerged from the forest shadows. Daring groaned. “Oh yeah...” she muttered. “I forgot they could do that.” I let out a deflated exhale. I forgot too. They could all merge their bodies into one massive-

My thoughts were cut short as its body suddenly erupted, a green blast hitting it in the side. Splinters and smoldering pieces of sticks landing all around. Daring, Derpy and I all had puzzled expressions on our faces as Daring spoke up. “Uhm... I don't recall them ever doing that...”

A black figure emerged from the shadows which had me relieved. “Oh phew... Chrysie... perfect timing,” I said through deep breaths. The Changeling queen approached us, a worried look on her face. From behind her, a dog followed close behind. The dog was Lassie and Max's pup, but now no longer a puppy in size.

“You look horrible,” she said to me but I brushed it off.

“Nah. Derpy's the one who really got the worst of it-” the gray pegasus mare quickly cutting me off.

“I'm not that hurt, see-” she was cut off by her own yelp of pain as she tried to hover above the ground. I helped her up with a shake of my head.

“Derpy... you're my bestest friend. I can't let you go on like this. I don't wanna see you get hurt.” I looked to Daring. “Can you get her to a hospital?” I asked, the other mare nodding before Derpy interjected.

“And you're my bestest ever friend. I can't leave you now. Who's gonna have you're back?!” she cried out. I pulled her into a hug, spreading more of my crimson red blood all over her fur.

“I love you Derpy, more than you may ever know. You were my first true friend. You always had my back, through thick and thin... and I'll never forget that. You were the most normal thing to me when I first came to this world. The first pony who didn't treat me like I was something different. And I can't bare to see you get hurt anymore than you already are,” I told her, still holding her tight, her hugging back even tighter. I could feel tears coming down her cheeks and onto my open shoulder, the jacket all torn to hell.

“We're going to see each other again, right?!” she nearly cried through a sob.

“Of course Derpy. Chrysalis is going to watch over me now,” I told her and she pulled back to look me right in the eye.

“Promise?” she asked and I nodded, turning my rear to her.

“Tail-Twist swear Derpy,” I promised and we bumped flanks before turning back to one another. “Alright... now you gotta go,” I told her, Daring helping Derpy take flight.

“I'll see you soon okay,” Derpy cried out as they took off, Chrysalis stepping up next to me, shadows covering our facial expressions as she spoke.

“Why did you lie to her?” she asked, almost all too knowing. I shook my head as I turned to her.

“I didn't,” I replied in a very stoic tone. I wanted to cry but I couldn't right now. It hurt more than anything to do that to Derpy but the truth of the matter was, that by the end of it, we would be seeing each other again, just not until it was her time. I was almost positive of that.

Nopony would have been able to tell my feelings from just a visual but Chrysalis somehow did. “You can cry, if you'd like. I won't judge you,” she told me. There was a moment's pause. “I feed off love and emotion. I can tell what you're feeling,” she informed me and I swallowed deeply.

“Chrysie...” I trailed off, deep sorrow in my voice which choked my words slightly. I took a deep breath. “You were the first ever pony I met in this world,” I told her and she chuckled.

“Changeling, actually,” she joked and I laughed.

“You... you know what I mean. I didn't care that others thought you were some kind of... some kind of monster. Hell, I even thought it was strange that after Zecora told me what kind of monster you were, that you didn't want to loot some houses with me when Ponyville looked like a ghost town... I... I guess I just wanted to say... thank you. For showing me that a pony isn't always what they're cracked up to be. That not everything is what it's said to be...” I told her, a little out of breath.

I looked to the forest ahead. It wasn't far now... wasn't long now. Chrysalis looked to me, sadness in her eyes. “You don't have to do this,” she told me. I closed my eyes, letting my conscious clear itself of all my woes. With my eye still closed, I looked up to the night sky, feeling the cool breeze brush against my wounded skin. I just wanted to... to lay down...

I could feel the wounds healing, but very, very slowly. “I know,” I told her. Lassie and Max's pup brushed up against my leg, looking to me with equally sorrowful eyes, just like Chrysie. I gave the dog a few pats on the head, looking to Chrysalis and contemplating it all. I couldn't just go back... a hospital couldn't fix this... and I couldn't just leave it up to somepony else at this point. What if it got too out of hoof before they arrived?

“The worst thing a pony can do... is not to do evil...” I told Chrysalis, while I looked back up to the sky. “But to do nothing, when they could have done something.” There was a long pause before I started walking towards the ominous glow, Chrysalis and her dog in tow.

“Evan?” Chrysalis asked, myself giving her a silent nod to continue. “I always wanted to thank you. F-for... for giving me a chance when nopony else would. For helping me find love. For helping me find Max. For taking me in. Introducing me to ponies... for everything,” she told me, a lone tear trickling down my face.

“I... I enjoyed our times together Chrysie,” I told her before taking a deep breath. “Nobody knows what it's like...” I trailed off and she giggled lightly with a smile.

“To be the bad mare,” she said, slightly changing the lyrics. We continued to sing the first song we had heard together as we traversed towards the beaming red light that still shot sky high.

We finally reached a clearing. The red light was coming out of some kind of geyser in the ground, the ground itself cracked and getting wider and more unstable with every passing minute. Dark spirits seemed to be escaping through the geyser and before it stood a lone, cloaked figure.

“Tartarus!” Chrysalis whispered.

'No...' I thought silently. 'Something much worse...'

Chrysalis went to step forwards, her horn glowing but my left arm crossed her chest. “No... Chrysalis, go get help,” I told her but she shot me a defiant look.

“You told me the worst thing a pony could do was nothing,” she responded but I shook my head.

“Somepony has to get help and know where all this chaos is coming from... while somepony else has to try and slow it down,” I told her. She seemed defiant but I turned to her with a pleading look. “Please, Chrysie. I have a daughter. I won't be able to run back as fast as you could fly. I haven't the energy to muster a teleportation spell and somepony needs to do something.” She shook her head.

“I can teleport you!” she snapped back, almost furiously. “You said it yourself, you have a daughter to go back to!” The words hit me hard but I shook my head before pulling her into a kiss, her eyes going wide. It wasn't exactly passionate, or sexual... it was just...

“Chrysie,” I told her, pulling back from the kiss. “I may have a daughter... but I don't have much time left as it is. You still have your youth and... no amount of magic or medicine can save me now,” I replied. Tears poured down Chrysalis' face as she pulled me into a hug, holding me tight. “Hey Chrysie?” I asked and she looked up to me. “I always did think you were really cute.” I gave her a smile which she tearily returned as she took a few steps back. I could see it in her face. She didn't want to. I could feel it, her anguish and sorrow. She had lost Max... and now me.

There was a bright green flash and just like that she was gone, along with her dog. I turned to the clearing around the geyser, to the figure who stood lonesome and with that, I began my approach. My fists clenched. I could feel it. Somehow, I didn't know how, I knew who he was.

I stopped within a few feet of him, his rear still turned to me. My lip twitched, brow furrowed. “Yes...” he hissed. “I can feel your anger...” he nearly laughed. A deep burning inside of me began to boil over. I could feel my wrist bones start to separate, the skin between my knuckles split as the Shadow Steel claws began to emerge. “Do it... sate your hatred upon my body...”

But just as quickly as my hatred had came, it was gone. A tidal wave of calm splashed over my body as I inhaled deeply. My fists went limp, fists unclenching, bones buckling back together and my expression shifting to a more gentle expression. Blood still ran down just about every inch of my body.

“It's over,” I told him, the figure just laughing as he pulled back his cloak's hood, revealing his unicorn horn, blue fur and mane. He tossed a book up over his shoulder which landed by my feet. It was my bible, the one from earth. My one eye went wide.

“Quite an interesting read you know. Our bible doesn't read about brimstone, and death, and mass famine or rapture where the lord comes back and purges the planet... his greatest battle taking place here among our mortal realm,” he laughed as he rose another book in his front hoof for me to see. The book of Unlimited Fantasy. My heart skipped a beat as I realized what he had done.

“You didn't!” I growled and he merely laughed.

“What? You're religious aren't you? You'll be spared the rapture of your dearest lord and savior, won't you?” he laughed cynically. “A world infested with vermin, finally purged of all its evils. Only those that are pure in the lord's eyes will be spared... isn't that right?” he cackled. I slowly walked up beside him, the glow of the red light illuminating our features but never once making eye contact with one another.

“Tristan... it's not too late to stop this,” I told him, the unicorn stallion merely laughing at me.

“Stop what? This is the end time. But worry not. You'll be spared, right?” he laughed.

“It doesn't need to be like this. Tristan...” I trailed off, looking to him without turning my body, and him to me in a similar fashion, the crimson lights casting our great shadows upon the forest behind us.

“Then tell me, how should it be?” he challenged.

“I... I understand why you did what you did... to your sister,” I told him, the stallion shooting me a hateful glare. “Because... in a sense, I'm much the same,” I told him, the stallion's hateful gaze softening slightly, curious to my explanation.

I looked back to the deathly light. “Yes... I hurt somepony I held very dear on a conquest to receive love,” I told him, Tristan's look had slight confusion in it. “You see... I wanted nothing more than the affection of motherly embrace and love... and it would seem I stopped at nothing to get it, even the feelings of that same somepony I wanted the love from...” I trailed off.

Tristan was silent as I continued. “So... despite the fact that the love we sought after so badly was different, it was the same in the fact that we hurt others to get it...” I trailed off and looked to him, dead in the eye. “Tristan... despite all that you've done... all those that you've hurt, even killed...” I said, thinking remorsefully of Lassie and Trixie.

“I forgive you,” I told him, the world seeming to sit still all around us. His look was one of pure awe. It took everything inside of me to do that, to mean that... to stand by that and not simply rip his throat out for everything he had done. But time had changed me. No longer were the days of killing or violence or vicious revenge. I put a hand to his shoulder. “It's over now...” I trailed off as I drew out Belladonna but kept her pointed to the ground. “I came here to kill you...” I said as I rose the gun's barrel to his forehead, his eyes going wide. With one flick of the wrist however, I tossed the gun aside.

“But it's time for us to forget about past. For the last embers of this fruitless folly to finally go out,” I told him, hands now on his shoulders in a surrendering way. He paused for a good long while, looking to my handgun that I had tossed away so casually. He finally looked back to me, an expression of awe still in his face.

Before I could even react however, a blast of energy hit me in the chest, launching me several feet back and myself skidding against the ground before finally coming to a stop. I groaned, my chest smoking from his blast. “You're a fool!” he snapped. “It seems that you've forgotten... nothing is forgotten. Ponies won't welcome me with open hugs and warm kisses,” he snapped. I tried to crawl back as he hit me again with another blast, sending me further back.

“Look at you. Bleeding like a stuck pig. You didn't come here to try and reconcile me... you came to try and get me to stop because nopony could stand against me. Not Celestia... Not Luna... not the Element of Harmony Bearers... and especially not you,” he snapped, launching me again.

“When this is all over... my sister will accept my love... and maybe, in time...” he trailed off, smiling cynically to me. “Even your daughter.” My eyes went wide and he laughed. “Oh yes... I know of her. She's going to become quite the looker. I can tell. She'll make a fine addition to my herd,” he cackled, laughing towards the sky.

My eyes burned with anger, my restraints of calm and peace shattered into a billion pieces. My right hand shot out, reaching towards the direction of my faithful handcannon, Belladonna. The handgun glinted in the distance. There was a slight wiggle...

“Oh yes... when I'm finished with you I'll-” his words got cut short. The gun zipped through the air and straight into my palm, grip fitting perfectly. The polished chrome gleamed brightly. 'Belladonna' glowed along the right side of the barrel while the left side shone brightly, the inscription glowing ever brighter. 'And thy lord shall set thee free'.

The gunshot almost seemed silent... The flash from the muzzle brilliantly overwhelming the hellish red glow for just a moment's time... the slide kicking back and spitting out a still smoking shell casing... the gun tilting up in my grip from the recoil... then back down for what could have been a follow up shot that was never needed, or used...

The world was still, neither Tristan nor I moved an inch. We just stayed like that, looking at each other, a look of shock on his face.

Fur on the side of Tristan's neck was fluffed and he flinched, the world returning to motion as he staggered back and stood still for a second before a gush of blood began to stream down his neck. I had clipped him, but the shear mass and force of the 300g .50AE round had severed his jugular.

He coughed and blinked in utter shock before collapsing to the ground, gagging wildly as he tried to hold the wound closed. I stood up and slowly made my way over to him. “It didn't have to be like this...” I trailed off as Tristan spat up a glob of blood, his horn glowing as he tried to heal his wounds. “Nothing can heal a wound from her,” I said, brandishing Belladonna in the crimson light for him to see.

He coughed again before laughing, his teeth all bloodied. “You would know... wouldn't you?” he chuckled before coughing up more blood, a pool now forming beneath him. I closed my eyes as I pulled aside my jacket, a memory from not all that long ago flashing through my head...

'Freeze let out a shrilled laugh as she pointed the cannon at my daughter. I charged towards Freeze with a roar, Spike also bringing up the handcannon. I tackled into her as the handcannon went off with a deafening report. I felt the jacketed hollowpoint round hammer into my side, clipping me and puncturing my lung...'

I had been going this whole night with a punctured lung and a fatal gunshot wound that, regardless of magic or medicine, could never be healed. I would bleed to death and that would be the end of it. It's why I couldn't go back. Spike would never forgive himself. Even though I had warned him he wasn't ready for it, he didn't deserve the knowledge of knowing what he had done...

Tristan laughed, coughing violently as his end neared. “Look at you... even in death... I've won...” he mocked. “You can't stop what is to come... and you're too blame... you're bible... was what brought about this world ending event... and despite everything... you couldn't stop me,” he said, pulling out The book of Unlimited Fantasy. I looked to it. The one thing that could save this world. I went to take it but before I could even touch it, Tristan tossed it into the geyser.

I watched as my last hope was tossed hopelessly away. My eye went wide, first in disbelief, then in anger. “TRISTAN!” I roared but he simply laughed, coughing up one final spew of blood.

“I... I'll, ack... kack... see y-you... in hell,” he died with a twisted smile on his face, his eye color fading to gray as he passed away. My hands fell to my sides before I fell to my knees. He... he had beaten me... again... but this time, it wasn't just one pony... one being I had let down... I should've let Chrysalis help me... or somepony... once again I had done things arrogantly, on my own... I thought I could fix this on my own...

I scooched up against a tree... I didn't know how to fix this... I watched as the geyser continued to let chaos enter the world, growing larger with every passing minute... all those evils... and then a rapture would come... and not one deserving of this world... no... that rapture... it was meant for mine...

“Twilight...” I reached out towards the sky, blood dripping down my hands and arm. “Everypony...” I whispered as my eye closed. My lung had collapsed long ago and it was only a matter of time. “I'm sorry... I failed you... a-agai... again...” I dipped my head down in shame, arm falling to my side as my eye closed. I felt it... the darkness... shrouding around me...

“D-Derreck... y-you... you wouldn't... wouldn't have failed...” I whispered...

The world around me faded, along with my life. This was it...

Suddenly I was jolted awake by a presence. “Evan,” she spoke, waking me up abruptly. I coughed, blood coming up from my lungs. “Evan, wake up,” she spoke. I looked to the tall slender being, my eye coming into focus one last time as I looked upon her. She was no longer with foal, which meant that Derreck would've been a father... and that Nightmare was a widow because of me. I groaned before I closed my eye again for the last time.

“Nightmare...” I whispered. A thought... an idea, came to mind... probably a delirious one... but none the less, one last chance to stop it. Tristan had given me a hint as to how to stop it... where he had thrown the book...

“Evan, get up,” Nightmare pleaded.

“Night... mare... I'm sorry, for what I did,” I told her. I could tell she was confused. “Derreck... wasn't killed by Tristan... he died... by my hand. I killed him mercilessly so that I could survive...” I trailed off and there was a long silence. I could tell she couldn't believe it. “As you learned with Luna... there can only be one... and I vanquished Derreck so that I would remain...” I told her.

I suppose it wasn't far from the truth. Sure... Tristan had brainwashed Celestia into having Luna and I confront Derreck in some convoluted excuse that he was a danger, that if we didn't defeat him that Celestia would go after Nightmare... all to set the stage for Tristan's takeover... but I had chosen myself over Derreck. Maybe that's why Derreck just let me kill him, to see the repercussions of my own action. In knowing that he was the best, he knew that I wouldn't be able to protect my friends like he could have... and he was right.

Those were my last thoughts...

* * *

Nightmare hit me with something so fierce... so brutal... it felt like my flesh had been scorched off my bones. I lay huddled on the cold ground... it felt like... like asphalt...

I gasped, still smoldering... 'Why... how am I alive?' I thought to myself before I heard an echoing laugh.

“You're not,” he chuckled. I looked up, taking note that both my eyes worked. “Yeah, yeah, I know, crazy right?” the figure asked from nearby on a park bench. The rest of this place was pitch black. There was a small asphalt path leading up to the bench, then going past it but leading into eternal darkness. A lamp post sat just behind the bench, only illuminating this small area with a dim haze.

“I'm dead?” I asked, and the figure laughed again.

“No... not quite. This is where the in-betweens go.” I stood up, noticing that I had my clothes on but no longer bled profusely, on top of that my clothes were in pristine condition. I slowly walked over, noticing this... this stallion, this pony... looked familiar. It was like I had seen him somewhere before... perhaps in a dream?

“Sit down... I don't bite... anymore,” he laughed, pulling up his mask to smile, but had no teeth to do so, giving me a look of slight disgust on my face. “See?” he laughed. I cautiously sat beside him and there was a moment's pause. “You don't remember me?” he asked in curious wonder. I bit my tongue. I should... but...

“The Face of Death?” he asked and it hit me like a wrecking ball. “Yeah... well, looks like we're stuck here together... probably forever,” he mentioned and I cocked a brow. “Like I said, this is where the in-betweens go,” he said.

“In between what?” I asked curiously.

“In between death and life. See, not everypony or everything that dies comes through here. Only the ones who aren't supposed to be able to die come here, or who aren't ready for death yet... you know, like a near death experience?” he asked. I blinked. “Anywho... well, I had some witch cast some soul in a jar spell or something on me so I wasn't supposed to be able to die... like, ever... like, never-ever no matter what. I've been completely obliterated and came back from spit left over on a chimic-” he informed me before I cut him off mid-sentence.

“But then I killed you?” I asked curiously. Technically Derreck had killed him.

“Exactly, you and that... that,” he pointed and I noticed Belladonna was with me too, holstered to my thigh. “It somehow made me dead enough that I can't return to life. But since I can't die either, I ended up here, and since my soul had been sealed away, I can't really die, so that two legged cat thing won't take me away,” he said and I rose a brow.

“Two legged cat?” I asked, picturing some kind of amputee feline as I shifted in my seat to look him more dead on.

“He's like... a conveyor of the dead to help them on their way to the afterlife. Like... guides lost souls to where they need to be. That kinda thing... I think,” The Face of Death informed me. “He's got no fur, but he kinda looks like a cat and walks on his hind two legs. Oh, and he's got these wicked cool hieroglyphics fused into his body, like, really cool ones. And he carries around this weird cane and cross thing too.”

I thought to myself before the pony interrupted my thoughts. “So how did you end up here?” he asked and I shrugged, turning to face the endless abyss of darkness.

“I died,” I replied and he just laughed it off.

“No you didn't,” he stated, perking my interest. “Ponies and things that die don't get to keep their clothing and belongings, except folks like us who are 'beyond' life but cannot reach death... at least not yet,” he informed me, piking my interest more. “See with me, my soul can literally not die, because of that witch. But my body can, so now I'm stuck here. You... well... I dunno... there was this other guy that came through here too a long while ago. Looked like one of your kind, but real scarred up. Like he had been through a war,” he mentioned.

“Derreck,” I muttered, The Face of Death's ear twitching at the mention of his name.

“Mhmm... that kinda rings a bell. But anyway, that cat thing... he'll be coming soon to check you out...” he trailed off and I let out a deep exhale. If he let Derreck pass on, then he should let me pass on too, and then I could stop all the madness and chaos from engulfing Equestria.

“So this... cat... what happens?” I asked and he just shrugged.

“He comes along, checks you out, then puts you in his floaty boat and off you go to the other world... unless you're me... which brings me to my next point,” he started, myself perking a brow. “Last time I tried to hitch a ride in his boat to the other world, he threw me out with some magic. Bastard won't let me die. Leaves me to my insanity in this endless nightmare. Do you know how lonely it gets?” he asked as I cleared my throat.

“So... you're asking me to stay with you?” I asked and he shook his head.

“No no, see, way I look at it... and the way you're going to look at it... is that you owe me for killing my body,” he mentioned, myself cutting in.

“You wanna switch places with me when this... cat thing shows up?” I asked and he paused for a moment.

“You know... I've tried to con my way through a few other ponies but I doubt it'll work. No... you distract him, and we steal his boat and get the hay outta here,” he said and I rose a brow.

“We just... take his boat and leave? He won't realize we're stealing his boat? Or once we're on it without him he's just powerless to stop us?” I asked. His plan seemed pretty flawed.

“Naw... we'll just figure out something to deal with him when the time comes,” he stated. I went to say something when an ice cold chill went down my back, shivering my entire body. A light, black, mist coated the ground. I closed my eyes as I could feel a presence approaching. Tingling chills coated my skin and made me shiver.

I opened my eyes as I stood up, another bone shaking shiver going through my body. “Anubis...” I whispered fearfully as the ancient jackal god approached. Back on earth in my younger grade school days we had researched ancient Egypt and all the gods, and this one stood out amonsgt all the rest. He stood tall, a good couple of feet taller than me. His skin was jet black, with golden hieroglyphics merged into his body that glowed brightly.

He rose one of his hands, his long clawed finger pointing directly to me. “You there... human... come forth,” he ordered but in a fairly gentle tone. I was struck in absolute fear. Far worse than when I first met Celestia... far worse than any encounter with Death...

I stood and walked forwards, Anubis tilting his head ever so slightly as he eyed me up with his glowing red eyes. There were no pupils, no iris, nothing. Just glowing red orbs. His muzzle was long and snarly, razor sharp teeth protruding out of his closed lips like an alligator. “So young... sooo much wasted potential,” he hissed.

He started to circle around me, eyeing up my every inch of being. “So... the infamous Evan Burdick... hmm?” he asked, making me swallow hard.

“Y-you... y-y-you've... h-heard of me?” I asked shakily and he nodded with a laugh, stopping to stand behind me, putting me between his boat and himself. I slowly turned to face his terrifying presence.

“Fear not. For I have not come to harm you... I am merely a conveyor for the lost spirits. To help you find your way,” he said, making me feel slightly less intimidated. “I have... heard of you... the one who defies Death... who kills Death...” he hissed. “No... No it was not you who killed Death. No, that was your other half-” he was suddenly cut off by his own gasp of pain. “W-why?!” he hissed in shrieking agony, making me stumble back in shock.

Suddenly, on a diagonal slant, he slid in half, a perfect line sliced through him. His body fell lifeless to the ground, his glowing eyes now dull and extinguished of life. “JESUS CHRIST!” I screamed, being answered by a laugh.

“Nah, it's just me. The Face of Death,” laughed that cynical pony freak that had been sitting on the bench. I looked to him, then to Anubis, my heart rate going up extraordinarily.

“Oh no... oh no... shit shit shitshitshitSHIT FUCK!” I screamed as The Face of Death cleaned off his katana blade.

“What?” he asked, oh so nonchalantly.

“W-what do you mean, 'what'?!” I yelled, pointing to the dead body of Anubis. “You just fucking killed him!” I yelled, the pony just shrugging.

“Yeah, so?” he asked, still casual and careless. My heart was thumping in my chest, which was weird because technically I was kinda sorta dead and a spirit.

“Yeah so... yeah so!... YEAH SO?! He's Anubis, god of fucking the dead!” I yelled in complete panic. I just knew this was going to get a whole lot worse, really soon. The Face of Death just laughed.

“Actually I think they call that necrophilia,” he joked, making me glare at him. “Fucking the dead? You know, sticking it in dead bodies... you know?” he asked, putting a twist to my cursing but still not breaking my panic. "Sheesh, tough crowd." He clucked his tongue while the pause lingered. “Besides, how else would we have gotten on his boat?” he asked and I looked to him with a slacked jaw.

“When I asked what we were going to do, you said we'd figure someway to deal with him,” I yelled and he just laughed, pointing to him with his katana.

“Yeah... and I dealt with him,” he laughed, making me fall to my knees before the dead god. This was bad, really, really, REALLY, fucking bad.

“Oh my god... oh my god... oh my god, OH MY GOD!” I began to panic.

The Face of Death laughed again. “Well, I just killed that god, so hopefully you aren't praying to him.”

“What the hell are we gonna do now?” I asked. This was just getting worse and worse. The god killer just pointed to the boat Anubis rode in on.

“Well... I suppose we do what we originally planned. Hop on his boat and get back to the world of the living. Once in a lifetime opportunity my dude,” he offered with a laugh, sniping up Anubis' cane and cross before hoping in the boat. “You coming?” he laughed. I realized at this point I'd have to deal with one problem at a time. I stood up, straightening my posture in a prideful way.

“I need to go to hell,” I told him, his face turning to a frown.

“Jeez, usually you send other ponies there, not yourself,” he commented.

“I have a score to settle,” I told him and he chuckled.

“Can't it wait till you die? I mean, I doubt the other guy would be going anywhere, if he's in hell that is,” he mentioned and I pointed back to Anubis' body.

“It can't wait now,” I told him and he rubbed his chin.

“Oh yeah... forgot about that little detail... huh... okay, well it'll only be a one way trip. I'm not staying in hell, err, Tartarus, wherever... Satan has it out for me, something about when I porked his kid,” he commented, making me groan.

“Jesus Christ,” I muttered out a groan, making the stallion laugh.

“Uhh, no. I said Satan's kid, not God's kid. Now are you coming or what?” he asked, making me inhale deeply before hopping on the weird boat craft. It was now or never I guess. “All aboard, next stop... Tartarus, choo-choo” he said like some kind of goofy conductor. The boat began to shift and move on its on.

Within seconds we were traveling through the darkness. The Face of Death spoke to me as we became engulfed in the darkness. “Usually when you run into the darkness, you end up coming out on the opposite side of that boardwalk with the lamp...” he trailed off. In a blink the boat jerked and shuddered before the scenery changed to a most hellish one. It was hot, boiling even. Lava scorched the ground, the place looking like some kind of satanic cavern... well, I guess that's why they called it hell and Satan and all that.

The boat pulled up to a shoreline. There were hundreds of souls, trapped in cages, floating aimlessly, screaming in horror and anguish. “This is as far as I go,” The Face of Death told me. “From here on, you're on your own.” I hopped out of the boat and turned to look at him one last time.

“You sure you don't wanna come with? I could probably really use your help. I'd definitely owe you one,” I told him, making him shake his head as he pushed his boat off the shoreline.

“Nah... we're square now. You killed me, and then helped me come back to life. I don't feel like holding a debt to a dead man,” he called out before traveling downstream of the lava. That was fair... I guess. Now the question was how to find that damn book and reverse all this.

Having read the bible, both the Equestrian version and the one from my world, I would've half expected myself to be able to handle this, all I had to do was find a book, and with my youthful body restored it should be no problem. But this place truly lived up to its namesake.

I began walking, sweat quickly pouring down my face and body.Traversing across the desolate plains of scorching ground... it felt like asphalt but looked more like hard compacted dirt. Even through my boots, the ground felt like it was scorching the bottoms of my feet with every step I took, every movement being a struggling battle.

The streams of lava that seemed to run everywhere produced a heat so extreme, that even walking as far away from them as I was, I still felt like I was burning, like the hair on my head was going to sizzle away, the skin on my body burning to a crisp. A headache from the blistering heat quickly ensued and I could barely keep my train of thought. It felt like my head was going to explode. My eyes burned. My feet were sore and felt as though they had been scorched through my boots. Every breath was a battle to be won, but even so my lungs felt torched from the heat of the air. I began to shake and quiver from all the extreme stress my body was undergoing.

Everywhere looked the same. Giant stalactites hanging from the uppermost parts of this place. Immense hills, some of which had rivers of lava streaming down them. I staggered a bit, wiping a smear of sweat from my face that burned my eyes. I closed them, screaming out in agony as I fell to my knees. I didn't know why I even tried this. I was too weak... too pitiful. I...

I slammed my fist into the ground, eyes still clenched shut, burning painfully. My hands felt like they were burning against the ground. “Fuck...” I cried out, knowing this was impossible. If only... “Derreck...” I gasped. I knew... somehow I knew, if he were here everything would have been fine. But we had all been played, from Tristan brainwashing Celestia and having her have me kill Derreck with Luna's assistance, to luring us to that blasted mine and killing Lassie to...

My fist slammed into the ground again as I let out another wailing curse. I cursed again, and again, and again... I stopped as I managed to force open my eyes. I could barely see through all my tears and even so, the tears felt like they were boiling hot, burning my eyes further. My knuckles had been peeled open from the rough terrain. The bones... they were still coated in Shadow Steel, an intense mist of dark blue fog poured off of them before my skin sealed shut. At least I still had that going for me...

My eyes clenched shut as I tried to calm my breathing but found it nearly impossible. I stopped thinking all together and just let my mind clear itself. 'What would Derreck do?' I asked myself hopelessly. Celestia alive, it was like asking what would Shining Armor do. I had no idea what he'd do and he used to be a part of me.

I slammed my fist into the ground again. “FOR FUCK SAKES!” I boomed, again slamming a fist into the ground as I began to lose my mind. I kept pounding my fists into the ground until once again the knuckles were peeled open and bleeding, the blue magical mist pouring out from the steel cased bones. My whole body tensed as I began to lose myself in a fit of anger.

Tristan... that little no good shit... he had raped his sister, played me like a fool, had me kill Derreck, killed Lassie... and then... and then, of all things, when I finally came face to face with him again I had the audacity to offer him mercy. “MERCY!” I roared. “I'LL KILL YOU TRISTAN!” I screamed, yelling out that his killing would be his mercy.

I grunted, tears welting up in my eyes. I could feel it, my grasp on things slipping as I edged closer to insanity. A lone whimper escaped my mouth before a scream of anguish. He was in hell, I had sent him here, or rather, we were in Tartarus... and if he was here, than I could settle the score right. I could feel my vision change. My pupils slanted like that of a cat's, matching Nightmare Moon's. I'd bleed him...

The steel cased claws erupted blood from between my knuckles as they sprang out. I'd gut him, show him parts of himself... for all that he'd done. The things I'd do to him would make this place seem like heaven once I'm done...

I let out another horrifying roar as I felt myself slip even further into darkness, the shadow of hate consuming my mind and soul. Veins bulged from my muscles as they swelled and flexed, giving me an ungodly amount of strength.

My eyes closed once more and with a deep breath through my nose, I could see everything, even things past my regular line of sight. Rivers of lava, smoldering banks of ground...

And that's when I found him. He was standing near the geyser he had opened from this place, to the land of the living. I could even smell that damned book. I leapt forwards, body rearranging mid-flight so that I landed on all fours like a wild beast, claws digging into the ground. Normally it wouldn't be feasible for me to move quickly in the posture I was in. I looked more quadrupedal, like a wolf, than bipedal like that of a human. I looked more beast-like, more feral.

Regardless, I moved like a lightning bolt, red fumes smoldered off my figure as the powers of the Teumessian Fox granted me unparalleled speed. In the blink of an eye I had arrived, anger and hatred pouring off my body in the form of the blue smog.

“Tristan!” I snarled like a wild animal. He had his back turned to me, looking up to the geyser he had created. Even now more souls of villains and evil doers floated up, back to the world of the living.

Without looking to me, he spook in a soft tone. “Can you hear them? It's... beautiful...” he said, as though this was a great work of art. “They're calling out their thanks... singing... they're... overjoyed...” he said.

I growled, snarling as drool started to slip from my mouth. The more hatred that poured from me, the deeper I fell into becoming a mindless beast. My canines had grown, so much so they were more like the fangs of a wolf, curling over my bottom lip.

“Turn to me...” I hissed. “Turn to me so I can see your eyes... the expression you make... as I pull out your insides,” I growled, clenching my teeth as my fists tightened, blood running down the blade claws and dripping from the tips.

He slowly turned to me, flipping back the hood to his cloak. “Is that so?” he asked toyingly. “Well then, I shouldn't keep you from your temptation, now should I?” he asked, shrugging off his cloak and holding up the book. “Won't be needing this I guess,” he laughed, tossing it into a river of lava. The book quickly sizzled and burned into nothingness.

My gut twisted. That was my only hope to sealing that geyser. Tristan must have felt my anger building up further, like he knew what was coming. He stood to his hindlegs, widening out his front legs in an inviting way. “Do what you will. I won't stop you,” he offered, almost too easily. I took the bait and charged wildly but in a mere fraction of a second, a much larger, much heavier being struck into my side and plowed me into the ground. “But he will.”

The beast was ferocious, wild, unrelenting. Its fists pounded my head into the ground, crushing me. If it weren't for the Shadow Steel, I'd have been crushed. The beast grabbed me by my ankle and whipped me away.

I bounced and skidded off the ground for a few feet before flipping myself mid-flight, claws grabbing into the ground and grinding me to a sudden halt. I wiped the blood from my lip and looked on to my attacker and with that, everything seemed to pause as he spook. “How pathetic. I expected more from the Grace of God,” he snapped. “Yet in a mere few minutes of being down here, you've succumbed to nothing more than a murderous beast,” he spat. A few minutes? That's all I had been down here for? It had felt like hours on end. Days even...

All my hatred and anger seemed to simply vanish in that moment and I almost immediately reverted to my old self, the claws retracting back into my hands. “Der... Derreck?” I asked as he stepped forwards, spitting to the side. He was well kept, in his massive hulking form. He looked to be on par with Schwarzenegger during his performance in the original Terminator movie. Every accent of his body looks perfectly chiseled and well kept. The way he moved was confident, prideful... determined. I swallowed deeply as he stopped just a few feet away from me.

Without looking to him, Derreck spoke to Tristan. “I thought you said he wouldn't retain the steel skeletal casing from Nightmare Moon when he died,” he inquired, Tristan stepping forth, a few feet behind Derreck and slightly to his right side.

“Things didn't exactly go accordingly,” he replied. My heart skipped a beat.

“Der... Derreck, you... have you been working with him? This whole time?” I asked, things seeming even more dire than before.

“No, not this whole time. Just the last hour or so,” he explained. Tristan interjected.

“I found him when I arrived in Tartarus. Derreck here had already claimed the throne as leader of this place an-” Derreck cut him off quickly, and most abruptly.

“SHUT UP BLUE HORSE!” He roared. Turning to him, Derreck gave him a glare that instilled a look of terror across Tristan's face. “You make my sacrifices and efforts sound simple and meager!” Tristan took a few more steps back before Derreck turned his attention to me.

“I made a deal with the devil of this world so that our finest hour could commence...” he trailed off. “My name?” he asked and I felt as though I should answer.

“Derreck?” I asked curiously, making veins bulge from his forehead in what I perceived as silent fury.

“I am the ruler of all men... of all ponies! It was my destiny, my namesake foretold it!” he roared. Tristan interrupted again.

“You said you would kill him once he arrived. I've held up my end of the bargain, now it's time for you to-” he was swiftly cut off as Derreck swung his right arm towards Tristan, a gust of powerful wind blustered towards him, kicking up debris and skidding the unicorn back several feet. I could see the look of pure rage upon Derreck's face.

“I'LL KILL HIM WHEN IT SUITS ME, BLUE HORSE!” He roared. “The deal was that you would lure him here and I would kill him. There was nothing in that deal that said you had to remain alive. Don't make your usefulness towards me run short!” he boomed not even once glancing towards the unicorn. Tristan swallowed hard and stepped back several more feet. I dared to speak.

“I disappointed you? I'm pathetic?” I asked Derreck, turning his attention back to me. “That pony you've allied yourself with... he raped his sister... he killed Lassie... he's released literal hell upon Equestria!” I yelled, making Derreck's whole body tense.

“And he has done no wrong against myself, or Nightmare Moon!” he boomed back.

“He killed you!” I screamed.

“YOU! You killed me! You and that miserable alicorn.” Derreck roared back.

“He brainwashed Celestia and had her threaten Nightmare Moon to blackmail me into killing you!” I countered back.

“And it was a mercy killing! He put me out of my misery!” he roared and his statement took me aback. “I... my soul... is several millennium old,” he began.

“I was a banished spirit... rejected from the heavens and exiled to spend all eternity in hell. With my exile came great strife, anguish and hatred. Hatred against those who had wronged me. In myself I found my namesake... Derreck. In ancient text in means 'The ruler of all people... ponies'. Several millennium ago I began to live up to that namesake. My soul, my mind... I could possess those on the battlefields. It was a simple meager task, to possess those broken by war, violence and death... over the millenniums past I have partaken in many great wars... overthrown tribes... governments even. In every great war there was someone so riddled with anguish and despair that their mind and soul were easily overthrown, and I would become the physical embodiment. I may have technically been dead, but my spirit lived on through them, all the hatred and anger.” His words struck deep into me but I could tell his fury was only starting to heat up.

“But... in the start of the twenty first century, there were no great wars that plagued the earth as so many had done before. Governments that came to power began to coexist with one another, even if out of fear of mutual nuclear annihilation,” he said. “There were no great wars... no great anguish that would rip across nations abroad... and with it, people of great potential and strength who suffered immeasurable anguish began to diminish greatly.” There was a long pause before he glared deep into my eyes.

“But then I found you. You... suffering from parental issues to an extent that it nearly drove you to insanity... I took advantage of that anguish, but unlike before, this time I allowed your mind and soul to remain. I needed a balance if I were to ever truly start to rule over man, not just on the battlefield. I'd need a ying to my yang.” His fists seemed to unclench as his body deflated just slightly.

“But in doing so, parts of your emotions began to mix into me, corrupt me... just as I had been corrupting you. You were, as your name suggests, The Grace... you show love and compassion to all, even those who are completely undeserving of it.” He looked up, eyes closed as what looked like tears, trickled down his face.

“And then it happened. We ended up in this world... full of love and compassion, which only furthered your own emotions corrupting me even further. The only saving grace was that I could unbind myself from the mental constraints and become a true physical embodiment of myself. I could transform your body into my own... but even then, your impact on my soul had been driven too deep. I too began to feel love and compassion. Even during my rampancy when you laid dormant, ever so slowly I began to deteriorate... settle down... I learned to truly love another, see them as an equal. Would you believe me if I said that at one point I believed that living that kind of life was worth it all, throwing away my namesake? My pride?” he asked.

I stood there, a little lost in his monologue. He said he was supposed to be some kind of great ruler of all but the way he explained it, his soul just got lost in the mindless carnage and vicious appetite for killing. He didn't seem to want to rule, just keep killing.

“And when you came to kill me, that's when I realized it... that no matter what, no matter how hard I tried, I would always be living in the shadow of my former self. There would be no turning back for me at that point... there was only one way for me to return to the way I was before... AND I WANTED THAT LIFE BACK!” He roared.

“Derreck, I didn't have a choice!” I yelled in return.

“There was a choice! There's always a choice! With my powers, we could have overthrown Celestia! Luna! Cadance and Shining Armor... anypony who would have dared stood in our way... but I knew you wouldn't play along... and I knew my grasp on you was slipping... and that I was no longer the powerhouse I once was... I was corrupted, and above all else, I WANTED TO BE LIKE I WAS BEFORE! Ruthless and cold, uninhibited by foolish emotions!” he roared. I dared to speak

“So that's just it?” I asked. “What about Nightmare Moon? Are you just going to stop caring for her? What about your child she's given birth to?” I asked.

His whole body tensed before he let out a roar so powerful it pushed me back several feet. The ground beneath us began to shake and crack. “WHAT OF THEM?! When this is finished I will return to my wife and we shall rule the world together!” he boomed.

“So that means you still love, Derreck,” I challenged him and his anger began to boil over, along with the sheer amount of power he was putting out.

“There is no desire of love within me. No compassion. Nothing. Only hatred, anger... and a burning desire to rule over everypony else,” he roared.

“Derreck... let it go. There's still time for us to change this. I know you still love Nightmare. I can feel it. Love will always triumph over hatred,” I told him to which he laughed.

“Than show me, oh graceful one. Show me the power of your love and compassion for those foolish ponies. And I... I WILL SHOW YOU THE TRUE POWER OF HATE AND FURY!”

At this point Tristan intervened, stepping up beside Derreck, horn glowing. “If you won't hurry up and finish this, I will. I've had just about enough of this monologuing, sentimental-” he was met with a blow so furious that it sent him hurtling to the side, bouncing several times off the harsh, unforgiving ground.

“This does not concern you, blue horse!” he yelled without even looking at him, all his focus and attention on me. “This is between me and this love stricken fool!” he boomed. “Interrupt again and I'll erase you from all existence.”

I hunched just slightly, taking a very defensive stance. “So how's bout it... shall we commence?” he asked, the aura of power surrounding him still pushing out powerful gusts of wind that threatened to throw me off my feet.

“This isn't the time Derreck... we... I need to shut that geyser,” I told him, realizing that he would probably never help me in doing so. His right hand lifted to the side, arm out straight as his palm opened, pointed towards Tristan.

My mouth parted slightly in disbelief as he fired some sort of energy blast at the pony. The blast however missed him entirely and blew open another geyser. “So be it... if you want more ponies lives piling up on your conscience that is!” he retorted. Tristan gasped in utter disbelief.

“That's right...” Derreck said aloud. “Thanks to my unrelenting anger and fury, my powers have superseded even godlike abilities. I can split and bend even the fabrics of time and reality to my will.” I was in pure disbelief, and horror. “Just think... with two of those portal things opened, twice as many evil spirits will be pouring into Equestria and the world you loved... and what about all the ponies you loved? Twilight, Spike... even your new daughter... what will happen to them? So what will happen if I open three or four? Maybe a dozen?” he asked cynically as my focus slowly turned all to him. My teeth clenched. Regardless of strength difference... ability difference... all around difference... I'd have to stop him, otherwise...

The claws extended from the confines of my arms, out to their fullest length. “Fine...” I trailed off, a devilish smile crossing his face as he got precisely what he wanted. “I'LL SHOW YOU THE POWER OF LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP!” I roared, charging full speed towards him.

I reached him in a fraction of a second but his reaction was blindingly quick. A painful blow from his knee formulated itself into my gut, making me wheeze and instantly lose momentum to a standstill. That strike was followed by a devastating elbow strike to the back of my skull that slammed me into the ground with enough force to make a crater around my body.

“And that is but a mere fraction of my fury,” he stated, staring down to my body as I rolled over to try and get up. A stomping kick to my chest buried me deeper, the crater widening from the force of the impact. He looked over to Tristan who was battered with shock and awe. “It's time for you to leave blue horse-” I coughed and interrupted Derreck.

“No, Derreck! Don't! He'll-” he cut me short with another brutalizing stomp.

“He'll do nothing but abide me, his absolute ruler. He can have his sister, I don't care about that!” There was a slight pause. “And I'll have my queen, my child, and my empire!” he boomed. My whole body seemed to explode with power as I let out a scream of anguish. I couldn't let that happen to Trixie, or to anypony for that mater. Not again.

The whirlwind of power blew Derreck off my body. I flipped backwards and to my feet, turning to charge Tristan, claws extended. Before I could even make it a few steps however, a sharp elbow strike was driven into the side of my head. I staggered back but hardly had even a moment's time before dozens of punches were driven into my body in a mere second of time.

I heard Derreck yell to Tristan. “Or stay to watch the spectacle, but I warn you. You may be killed in the ensuing chaos,” he laughed, still driving punch after punch into my body. I let out yet another horrifying roar as I clenched my fists, claws still extended. I drove them straight into Derreck's chest before he could even react.

I coughed slightly, breathing heavily and painfully as Derreck gasped. “These... are a gift... from Nightmare...” I panted but my expression changed to one of horror as his hands grabbed around my wrists with a vice-like grip.

“And I'm going to give her one back,” he responded as he pulled my hands sideways, slicing the claws out of his body. I watched as the wounds healed shut. “Your head on a platter,” he laughed before twisting my wrists. The pain dropped me to my knees and Derreck took this moment to drive his forehead into mine, the force slamming me into the ground. His hands went down to grab me but the claws of my left hand drove through his forearm and I yanked down, hard. Pulling him off balance, my right hand claws drove into his side and I twisted his body, pulling it to the ground as I used the resulting momentum to flip my body up on top of his.

My claws drove into his chest several times, spurts of blood coming from the wounds that quickly closed shut. His legs hooked around mine and in an instant he rolled our bodies so that he was once again on top. With one brutal blow, he slammed my head into the ground with enough force to create another crater.

Shit... this must have been what Wolverine felt like trying to fight the Hulk. Grabbing me by the throat, he hoisted me into the air, my feet dangling several inches off the ground. My hands wrapped around his wrists, his arm extended out straight yet he never wavered in the slightest. Despite my heavy weight, he managed to hold me like this as though I was a feather.

“Y-you... don't need... to do this...” I wheezed. He had his fill of blood now, as far as I was concerned. We had our fight. His grip tightened. “I know... I know I killed you... for selfish reasons... and I'm sorry... you were... you were always better... you were the best... but not when you were like this,” I gasped. His grip tightened further and I began to gag, legs twitching violently.

His brows furrowed. “You're only saying that because you know I've won. You cannot defeat me. You wouldn't even know how to begin to kill me,” he growled. I drove a hard kick with all my remaining strength into his gut.

His grip loosened and I struggled free, dropping down and grabbing for my right thigh. In a moments time I had Belladonna drawn, pointed towards his still beating heart. “With this,” I explained, the inscription along the barrel glowing ever brightly.

Derreck was frozen in shock. He knew as well as I, that Belladonna would end not just his life but his existence entirely. Being already dead, he would simply cease to exist, his soul dying off. “But I won't... not again...” I said as I slowly stepped back, holstering the magnum handcannon. “What I did to you was wrong. I deprived you the love of being a father... of a wife having her husband... and of your child having a father,” I told him.

He stared at me with dead silence as I continued. “I won't further that mistake. I'd sooner let myself die than lose hope in you, but only if I was sure that in my death you'd make the right decision.” Derreck was so hesitant, I could tell. “I was wrong Derreck... and I'm sorry that I crossed you and misplaced your trust in me, and I don't expect you to forgive me... but please, don't take it out on everypony else,” I pleaded with him. I hadn't taken notice before, but Tristan was still here, watching this unfold.

Derreck clenched his fists once again. “So what? We just make up and everything is hunky dory?” he growled.

“No... but I imagine with all your powers, that there's a reason you never just blew open a portal for yourself to return to Equestria and have your revenge. You wanted me here, to suffer as you have suffered,” I told him. I walked up to him and drew the pistol once more, but this time I placed it in his hands. “If it will bury the hatchet, then do it. But please, don't bring harm to my loved ones... protect them, as I am no longer able. Without you Derreck, I was useless.”

Derreck was left speechless and it was at this point that Tristan chose to voice his opinion. “Blech, this sentimental downpour is brutal. Just shoot him already,” he snapped. Derreck held the gun and looked to me in awe, and in that moment I saw it. All his anger, hate and fury had left. There was nothing left but a deep sense of remorse.

He lifted the gun so it was leveled on my head. With that I closed my eyes and whispered to him. “Please... protect the world I loved.” I opened my eyes to meet his. I could see another tear trickling down his scarred cheek.

In an instant his brows furrowed, lips twisting into a face of fury and my heart skipped a beat. I thought for sure he had reverted once again back to his old ways and I had failed yet again but alas it was not so. He swung the gun towards Tristan but in that very moment let out a horrifying scream of pain.

Red hot marks burned into his arms, sizzling his flesh. The marks looked like those of chains. His finger squeezed the trigger and Belladonna went off like a crack of thunder, deafening me momentarily and partially blinding me with her brilliant muzzle flash.

Tristan hadn't even the time to flinch as the 300 grain slug barreled towards him at super sonic speeds. The shot missed however, the burning chains having knocked Derreck's shot off target.

The bullet grazed the fur on Tristan's cheek, making him blink and stumble backwards before falling on his rump. More red hot chains laced Derreck's body, making him scream out in anguish as everything became dimly lit in a dark haze of red. “A DEAL WITH ME CANNOT BE BROKEN!” Roared a terrifying voice. With it, the geyser portals between Tartarus and Equestria began to flicker and close. Tristan scrambled to his hooves and rushed towards one of them.

I went to charge after him but stopped as I heard Derreck's scream of anguish behind me. Time seemed to come to a stand still. I could easily catch up to Tristan, and punish him for everything. Or, I could go back and try to save Derreck. On one hand, I was certain I could stop Tristan, on the other I was less than positive that I could help Derreck. However, without the book, Tristan wouldn't fare much against the likes of Celestia... I hoped. Whereas I had betrayed Derreck and felt somewhat obligated to at least try to help him.

It was probably a bad choice, but I ran for Derreck. I looked back only once, briefly catching a glimpse of Tristan leaping into the portal geyser just moments before it closed. I grabbed at the burning red hot chains that ensnared Derreck and yelped as they scorched my hands.

The chains had dragged him to his knees. “A deal with me cannot be broken!” boomed the same voice from before. My fists clenched, the Shadow Steel blades erupting from my knuckles as I slashed into the blistering hot chains and cut Derreck free with one feral swipe. The blades cut through the chains like a hot knife through butter.

My hulking friend grunted in pain as he rose to his feet, the burns slowly healing. “Why didn't you go after him?” he huffed. I shrugged.

“I guess I kinda figured I owed you one,” I replied. “So what gives?” I asked, the world darkening around us.

“I uhhh... I uhm... I might have kinda...” he swallowed hard.

“Come on man, out with it,” I ushered.

“I made a deal with the devil of Tartarus. I'd get to go back to Equestria and rule unchallenged,” he said through gritted teeth.

“And in return?” I asked. He didn't get to answer as I let out a scream of agonizing pain. The same style of chains that had encased him earlier now wrapped themselves around my body and pulled me down to my knees.

The chains burned deep into my skin, stopping at the Shadow Steel that encased my bones. A voice returned my question with an answer. “I get you,” spoke a hellish voice. A figure emerged from the shadows, pointing a rather bony finger at me, a long nail protruding off the end of his finger.

He turned to Derreck with a scoff. “Don't think I've forgotten about your little stunt, oh great ruler,” he laughed the last part. “Now be gone!” he hissed. Derreck stepped backwards and disappeared into the shadows, leaving me on my own.

“G-g-god... damn...” I screamed, making the demonic ruler laugh and cackle.

“There is no god here for you...” he laughed, the chains tightening further and making it impossible to breath. I let out one final scream that expelled all the oxygen left in my lungs. The shadows began to blow away suddenly, a cool breeze washed over me that felt like a tidal wave of ecstasy compared to the scorching heat I had endured the last hour or so. Gusts of cool wind began to bluster in almost every direction, whipping up a whirlwind of force.

I heard a roar echoing from up high, gaining both my attention, and that of the demon ruler. A dark red aura flashed brightly, so powerful that it cast it's own dark light upon the shadows and drove them away. “A deal is a deal. I brought him to you, and I shall rule over all, INCLUDING YOU!” Derreck roared horrifyingly.

His hands cupped together tightly as he took an iconic stance. “An old friend taught me this one, I think you'll 'love' it,” he challenged. “Ka...”

The demon focused his attention to Derreck. “You've become quite the thorn in my side, oh great ruler!” he barked.

“Meh...” Derreck continued, making me laugh. How childish...

“A thorn which I am going to pluck out and burn!” The demon ruler yelled.

“Hameh...” Derreck continued. The demon rose his bony finger and pointed it at Derreck. I let out a scream as I clenched my fists, claws extending, driving through my own chest. The blades cut through the chains on my backside and loosened them altogether. I knew I wouldn't have much time.

I leapt forwards with a roar, the demon king only getting a glance towards me as I drove the claws into the corner of his neck and shoulder, making him shriek in pain while swatting me, flinging me aside.

He turned back to finish Derreck but as he rose his finger to the air once again, Derreck was engulfed in a fume of red dust and vanished from sight. The ruler of Tartarus just blinked in confusion but his confusion was soon answered as Derreck appeared directly in front of him with his hands still cupped, a sphere of blue energy shining brightly throughout the darkness.

“Surprise motherfucker,” Derreck laughed, hammering his cupped hands into the demon's chest and letting out a billowing roar that shook the ground as the blast fired, engulfing our enemy in a stream of light blue light.

There was a long moment's pause before Derreck lowered his hands and stumbled over to me, heaving me up and flopping one of my arms over his shoulders, making himself into an impromptu crutch for me to use. “The Kamehameha wave... seriously, that's what you think to use?” I chuckled. It was nerve-wrackingly childish but I guess it had worked.

We looked on to the wide expanse of Tartarus. “So?” I asked, Derreck looking to me with a wrinkled smile.

“So?” he asked back before I coughed in pain.

“I guess that's it then?” I asked and he shrugged.

“Yeah... I suppose... for now anyway. I guess all that's left is for us to make it back topside... as friends,” he mentioned and I laughed painfully.

“Do I have a choice?” I asked and he laughed back.

“Nah, not really.” We both looked at each other for a moment, basking in all the glory of it. I stood on my own, Derreck standing next to me as we looked out to the amass underworld of Tartarus. Maybe things hadn't turned out so bad. Maybe things would turn out alright in the end. “You know...” Derreck began. “It's nice... in a kind of satanic cult chic way.” His words made me laugh. I guess things turned out alright in the end.

“Hey D...” I looked to him, both of us taking in the victory. I reached into my jacket pocket and retrieved the old stogey cigar I had been carrying around since my arrival in Equestria. “I suppose this is a good a reason as any to smoke this?” He cocked a brow.

“Yech... that thing is probably stale as a German loaf of bread...” he trailed off whilst pulling out a metal flint lighter. Holding the cigar to my mouth while Derreck lit the end, I took the first drag of the old cigar, fumes filling my mouth. It tasted... pretty gross. I took a moment to enjoy the serenity of everything as Derreck took the cigar and had his puff. We stood there, smoking the cigar together... as friends. After some time, the cigar burned away and Derreck flicked the butt end down between his feet and stomped out the final embers.

“Welp...” he trailed ,off, leaning his elbow on my shoulder. “I guess in the end everything kinda turned out... okayish, I guess.”

We stayed standing like that for a good while before things suddenly got dark and gloomy again, a dark presence enveloping us both. “Goddess alive, what now?” I asked. We had just taken on the devil, so my first thoughts were that nopony, nothing, would be crazy enough to take us on.

“Our version of the devil. Tristan brought him here with that book... kinda like a fail safe if I wasn't able to beat you...” Derreck muttered, my heart skipped a beat. “He's come to collect,” he mentioned. We both stood in silence. I thought to myself about our possible options. We had just killed the devil of this world, but in doing so had tuckered ourselves out. Maybe if we could get our power back... or maybe if Derreck distracted him I could shoot him with Belladonna... or we could try and... I muttered to myself about how fucked we were.

“Quite royally,” the demon overlord hissed. “First you kill Anubis, and now him...” he said, holding up the Tartarus version of Satan, lifeless. I scratched the backside of my one hand, looking like a child being scolded by a parent.

“Don't suppose saying sorry will make it all better?” Derreck joked. The Devil gave him a glare. This wasn't going to end well. “To my defense, I didn't kill Anubis,” he joked, the satanic being giving a glare as he pushed forwards The Face of Death whom gave us a wave.

“Suh Duu?” he said in a fairly upbeat tone. I was at a loss of words but he quickly filled me in. “So... yeah, turns out traversing the afterlife? Not as easy as it sounds...” He looked back over his shoulder with a giggle before turning back to us. “Oh yeah, and this guy's a lot harder to try and kill than that cat guy.” Both Derreck and I covered our faces in disdain from his comment.

“Indeed,” the satanic voice boomed. “And you shall all pay the price for your-” Derreck quickly cut him off.

“WAIT! Hold on! Just... just, hear me out,” Derreck yelled. There was a moment's pause before he spoke. “I don't suppose you'd be interested in a deal?” he asked, the devil's interest piked. Of course... the devil always likes making deals.

“We fucked this up... so let's unfuck it, together,” Derreck said as he stepped forwards. The Devil looked to him with a very unimpressed stare. “A lot of bad shit has happened... so, we want you to change things back to the way they were before all this crap happened,” Derreck told him.

The Devil just laughed. “That sounds like I would be fixing it. And for what? The goodness of my heart?” he cackled. Derreck shook his head.

“No, you can have us,” he said, motioning to himself and I. My heart sank, but in that moment I realized that The Devil would only accept a deal if he got something he wanted in return. The Devil twitched his lip and pointed to The Face of Death.

“And he has to become the new Death... as punishment for killing Anubis,” The Devil stated. The Face of Death quickly piped up.

“Hey, no way. I have a thing with Death...” There was a long pause as we all looked to him. “You know... like... a sex thing,” he commented and we all gave him a glare. “Okay shit... shit, I'll do it...” he grumbled. I didn't particularly like this but I didn't think we had much of a choice. We just killed this world's Satan, there was goddess only knows how many undead villains running rampant topside and technically we were already dead, plus Anubis was killed and... the list went on.

“Alright then,” Derreck said. “Do we have a deal?” he asked, holding out his hand to be shaken, The Devil quickly piping up.

“Are you sure? You'd give yourself up, and for what? For all of them up there?” he asked, Derreck looking to me.

“Sometimes a ruler has to make the hard decisions,” he commented.

The Devil looked upwards and began to roll his eyes in disdain. “Oh for the love of...” he trailed off. “Fine, there, it's done,” he quipped. It didn't seem like anything had happened but suddenly the Satan of this world was back to life. But with a flick of his wrist, our Devil tossed aside the one of this world.

“Now then-” he began but I cut him short.

“Wait! Wait, hold on!” I piped up. “There's one more person I want to bring back,” I commented and he merely laughed.

“Asking to bring yourself back won't work,” he laughed but I shook my head.

“No... no, it's not like that... her name is Lassie. She died before all this happened... I just... can you bring her back too, but let me see her once before you do... do that, and we'll go willingly,” I said, The Devil looking to me with even greater disdain than he did Derreck.

“You'd give your soul up so that she... a dog, could live again?” he hissed and I nodded slowly and surely. With a huff, he clapped twice and Lassie appeared before us. She blinked in shock and looked around.

“Yeah, and I said... I uhh... I'm lost here, what's happening?” she asked, having obviously been in previous conversation. I stepped forwards and pulled her into a hug.

“Lassie,” I whispered to her. She pulled back from the hug and looked to me curiously, not recognizing me at first due to my younger appearance.

“Do I know y-” she cut herself off as she went wide eyed. “Whoa, hey Evan! You look great! What's your secre-” I cut her off by bringing a finger to her lips.

“Lassie... this isn't exactly a reunion,” I told her and she paused for a moment while taking in the surroundings, no doubt seeing Derreck and The Devil behind me. “When you get back, I want you to give this to Twilight,” I said as I handed her my journal that recounted up to the most current of events. I could tell Lassie's heart sputtered for a moment.

“No... no way, you're giving it to her yourself,” she challenged but I merely shook my head as I also unbuckled my leg holster and strapped it to her. “Evan, stop! You're not-” I cut her off as I pulled her into a hug.

“T-take care of them,” I held back my sobs of sorrow as she squeezed me tight. “Tell Twilight I... I'm sorry, for everything.” I felt tears welting up in my eyes, but I knew that Lassie's tears were already pouring out, on account of my shoulder starting to feel rather wet. I swallowed hard, holding the hug for as long as I possibly could.

“Don't go...” Lassie whined, squeezing me harder. “Don't...” she trailed off through a sob as I finally parted our hug.

“I'm sorry Lassie,” I told her, taking a step back. She looked on in despair. “Watch over my daughter,” I barely managed as I choked back a sob, tears flowing down my face. Lassie rose a paw out to me as she spoke.

“I lov-” she was cut off as she simply vanished, back to Equestria, back to the world of the living. I nearly fell to my knees in utter despair and anguish.

“That's enough of that... it's time to go...” mentioned the dark entity. With one clap, The Face of Death was dressed in black robes, a scythe in tow. He went to make a comment about how black wasn't his color but was quickly teleported away. A second clap and chains wrapped around both Derreck and myself. My body went limp as I let him drag us off. That was it. It was over... after everything we had been through it was-

I felt the ground beneath us start to get rougher, the friction scrapping against us became fairly intense. I heard The Devil grunting in effort as he continued to pull us along. Suddenly I felt the ground beneath us crack and crumble, crushing beneath our ever increasing weight.

I looked up to see The Devil turn to face us and heave with all his might yet now he couldn't even budge us an inch. “GAH! WHAT?!” He boomed in fury, his eyes blazing. There was a luminous light that burst upon us all, blinding The Devil, his arms covering his eyes as he screeched.

Like an angel's touch, I felt something invisible pick me up, and noticed Derreck being picked up as well, and our bodies slowly began to float into the bright light. “NO!” The Devil roared in utter shock. “HOW?!” He continued to roar. My eyes cracked open and I saw the heavenly skies above.

“The... the sacrifice!” The Devil roared in realization. “NO! We had a deal! They belong to me!” he screamed. I saw Derreck raise his right hand and gave The Devil the finger.

“Go fuck yourself,” Derreck barely whispered, but loud enough that The Devil could hear. Suddenly we were grabbed by spiny, bony hands. The fingers pierced our bodies, making Derreck and myself yell out in pain.

“YOU CAN'T DO THIS! THEY BELONG TO ME!” He roared, fighting the heavenly pull. His clawed fingers dug deep, piercing my flesh and making me scream out in horrifying pain. “THEY... BELONG... TO... ME!” He continued to roar, finally managing to overcome the heavenly pull, starting to drag us back to the hellish depths below.

“NO!”

A powerful voice boomed above everything else, a far more regal voice than anything I had ever heard before. The skies above fell upon a dark blue storm, the fiercest storm I had ever seen. Black clouds formed up above, canceling out the heavenly light. Lightning stormed and crackled as a lone figure emerged from the clouds, eyes gleaming a pure white shine. Her dark blue wings spread wide as she roared out.

“Nightmare...” I heard Derreck mutter out before the deafening voice of Nightmare Moon continued.

“As per our wedding vows... he belongs... to ME!” Her voice boomed, the tip of her horn flashing out a whirlwind of magic that shot out in all directions. It was all I could do but cover my eyes as the blinding light overtook us and my world went blank...

Epilogue

Epilogue

A blustering cloud of sand followed the red pickup truck as it traversed through the desert wasteland, heading towards an old run down garage in the desert. Lassie sat in the driver seat, window down as she hung her head out to catch the breeze, slobber drooling out from her lips.

Twilight sat in the passenger seat, holding a voice recorder as she sighed to herself from the goofy nature of the dog. Between the two sat her still young foal. Getting back to her previous task, Twilight began speaking again. “Gosh,” she said into the speaker. “It'll be... years before you can even understand these... and even then, up until this point it's mostly just been a way for me to come to terms that he's really gone this time... and isn't coming back,” Twilight said into the microphone piece as Lassie slowed down and wheeled the truck in front of one of the pumps.

A bipedal cat morph walked over and Lassie spoke to her. “Llénelo, por favor?”

“I speak English. We go over this every time you're here,” the cat woman said irritably.

“I know... but I like to practice,” Lassie laughed, making the cat roll her eyes as she got to pumping diesel into the duel tanks of the old diesel pickup truck. Lassie got out to greet Flim and Flam who had come out to chat with her.

Twilight brushed her mane to one side as she watched them, then looked to her daughter before speaking into the microphone, watching again as Lassie spoke to Flim and Flam. “If only you could've seen the world before your father came. You'd understand the difference he's made in so many pony's lives... gosh it was so different back then...”

Lassie leaned against one of the unused pumps as she laughed. “Yeah I know. Who woulda thought you'd give the bandit a job after all the times she robbed you though, am I right?” She chuckled. Flim chuckled as he nodded.

“Yes, but then we figured... why not just give her a job. She'd get paid and nopony would rob us!” both the brothers chimed in unison as they began to sing and dance. Twilight looked over the distant horizon...

Chrysalis giggled lovingly as she knelt her front end down, nose to nose with her dog as the two wagged their tails in unison. “Who's a good puppy?!” she asked joyfully to the full grown dog. “Yes! Yes you are a good puppy, and momma Chrysie loves you!” she chimed, the dog going wild from hearing those words, running in circles, panting wildly. Chrysie stood up with a smile on her face...

Luna side stepped before flipping backwards, landing perfectly on the mat in her personal dojo. The sword swung accurately and precisely as she swung the sword at nothingness, merely perfecting her combat form. The blade sliced through the air gracefully as the princess wielded it with perfected finesse, the sword that had been returned to her by close friend some time ago...

Alfred stood quietly and silently in the doorway, hoof motionless, resting just inches away from the door. He swallowed hard. Lassie had suggested that, since the estate was hardly ever used, he should retire from being their butler. After all, he was acquisitioned to the estate by the mobsters of Manehatten who had been annihilated later on by Derreck. With nopony to call boss, she had offered him freedom and proposed he go find his family whom were in Prance.

Taking in a deep inhale, he knocked four times before his whole body froze. There was no going back now. 'Do they even still care about m-' Alfred's thoughts were cut short as the door swung open and a middle-aged stallion answered.

“H-hello?” the stallion asked in a thick Prance accent. Alfred just stood there. It had been over a decade since he last spoke to his son, let alone seen him. The pause ended as the realization hit the son. “D... DAD?!” he asked, tears welting up in both their eyes as they embraced in a hug...

Echo sat in her chair, inside her tiny little home. The home itself was situated in a woodland area, far away from civilization. As she sat by her lonesome, she ran her hoof through her infant's mane, rocking it in her forelegs as she cooed a quiet melody to the baby. “One day, my sweet child... when you are older, I will teach you the things your fathers taught me. You will know both the light... and the dark”...

Nightshade set her now empty glass on the counter of the clubhouse. Her second in command slammed his drink down. “I still can't believe you'd just let him go, after everything he did to us,” he grumbled.

“Shut up Stratus. I owed him... Charger...” she looked to the other stallion of the group “Anything you wanna say about the issue?” she asked, the stallion gulping and shaking his head.

“Uh-no boss! Not a word,” he stammered, the mare smiling. “Well, actually...” he trailed off, Nightshade giving him a glare. “Well you see... there's this job I found, might payoff pretty well. There's this... this thing...” he trailed off.

“What kinda thing?” Nightshade asked, the others in the group listening in as Charger spoke.

“Well, see here's the thing. This thing... it's a, well it's a thing like the guy you were defending, except it's a she... and 'she' has quite the offer...

The stallion kept the cloak's hood over his brow, hiding his features from sight as he turned yet another corner of the city streets, continuing along at a modest, unsuspecting pace. Stopping at an intersection before looking both ways, he continued across the street and around another corner.

Just as he reached midway of the city block, a payphone began to ring nearby. Not paying it any mind, he continued on for another city block, but the payphone on that section of sidewalk began to ring as well, this time catching his attention. Picking up his pace, he took a right turn and continued on his way, another phone ringing.

Something didn't feel right to the stallion and he slipped down a back alley, behind some buildings and onto another street. As he walked along he stopped dead in his tracks, another phone ringing just ahead. A pitted feeling came about in his stomach as he swallowed deeply. No matter how long he stood there looking at the phone, it just kept ringing... and ringing... and ringing... and-

He broke the tension and yanked the phone off the receiver, just to make it stop ringing. His heart was pounding. Raising the phone to his ear, he stood in silence. “H-hello?” he asked in panic.

“Mr. T?” A voice came from the other end of the line.

“Y-yes?” he replied cautiously, heart pounding in his chest.

“We've met before, though not formally. I can assure you though, that this time will be far different...” the voice seemed to just trail off. There was a long pause as the stallion's heart continued to pound in his chest. Just then, he noticed something off. There was nopony around. Not a single pony, gryphon, donkey... nobody. A chill ran down his spine.

“Who... who is thi-” he began to speak into the phone but was cut off by an agonizing pain that went through his hindleg. “GAH! NYAGH!” He screamed as he fell to the concrete sidewalk, a gunshot echoing in the distance as blood began to pour out of the wound now present in his hindleg.

Screaming for help, he then noticed the dire, near impossible, circumstance he was in. How was it that nopony was on the street this time of the day, that nopony was around to hear the gunshot or his cries for help. A large, winged shadow flew across the sidewalk, making him swallow in panic as he painfully began dragging himself up a set of stairs.

Not far off, he heard the hoof steps of a pony drawing closer... and closer...

CLIP-CLOP

CLIP-CLOP

CLIP-CLOP

CLIP-CLOP

CLIP-CLOP

They stopped just beside him, and the long barrel of an old Russian scoped rifle rolled him over onto his back. “Hello Tristan. My name is Celestia... Princess Celestia.” The look on Tristan's face was one of pure terror and fear. “I think we need to have a little talk”...

Twilight paused for a moment before chuckling to herself, still looking out to the distance. “But... I guess... even with all that's changed... the more things change, the more they stay the same”...

Applejack gave one mighty buck to the trunk of the tree, shaking loose all the apples into perfectly placed baskets below. Wiping the sweat from her brow, she looked to her elder brother whom was now collecting the baskets of apples he had bucked off his tree.

“Well big bruther. Ah think this'll be the best season yet,” Applejack chimed, the big red stallion nodding in return.

“Eeyup,” he replied back, managing to perfectly balance all his baskets atop his back. In the distance of the pasture field, Scootaloo, Applebloom, Sweetiebelle and Spike all ran along together joyfully, laughing all the while...

Fluttershy placed a wonderfully made salad on the table in front of her most beloved animal friend. Looking at it curiously, the rabbit quickly opened wide to take a bite. “Oh but Angel... I might have... uhm, well... I didn't have the spices to make the ranch sauce the way you like it so it might taste a bit different...” the shy little pegasus meekly squeaked out.

The rabbit's mouth closed as he sat back, with the most plain of expressions. “I... I hope that's okay... with you...” the pegasus said meekly. Raising his left paw up over his shoulder, he smacked the food to the floor and crossed his front legs. “Oh... okay, you're right. I'll go get those ingredients right away for you,” she squeaked before rushing off...

In Sugarcube Corner, Pinkie blazed away, order after order quickly rushed out in what seemed like a blur of pink. Zipping back to the counter, she left out a relieved sigh as she took a seat. “Wow Pinkie... that was quick,” Mr. Cake mentioned as he stepped towards her. “Ready for the next order?” he asked and the pink bubbly mare simply giggled.

“I'm already done them all!” she cheered in an accomplished tone. Mr. Cake blinked in a disbelieving way before shaking it off.

“Oh... okay, well I have some deliveries for-” he was cut off by the ecstatic mare.

“This afternoon? I already did them,” she informed, the stallion taken aback by her response.

“Y-you did?” he asked and she nodded hurriedly.

“Yeah. I found them pinned to your cork board under 'TO-DO'-” she cut herself short as her hindleg began to twitch and front leg began to tap against the floor, mane vibrating. “Huh...” Pinkine mentioned, Mr. Cake giving her a curious look.

“What is it?” Mr. Cake asked curiously.

“I feel like someone is reading something about me... no, not about me... about somepony... a story... an ending... and they feel... a lot of feelings,” she told him. “Nevermind, feeling's gone”...

Rainbow Dash zoomed through the canyon, nearly picking up mach speed as she made incredible maneuvers. Nearing the end of the canyon, she pulled up and shot into the sky, a brilliant flash of light erupting across the sky as she pulled off her signature move.

Hovering back down to the ground, she trotted over to Tank, whom had a stopwatch laced over his neck. “How... was that?” Dash panted, taking a look at the watch and hitting the pause button, the tortoise too slow to manage pressing the button on and off. “AWWWW YEAH TANK! Look at that, beat my record!” Dash chimed, showing him the stop watch that read 9.89 seconds...

Rarity took a step back from her latest fashion dress, pouting her lip. “Nonono, this simply will not do. It just doesn't have... it, do you know what I mean Opal?” she asked her cat, whom looked to her with a purely bland expression. “Oh you're right darling, I know just what it needs!” she exclaimed, running over to a trunk and rummaging through some things. Finally finding what she was looking for, she affixed the purple box to the back hind of the dress with a smile.

“There... marvelous darling, simply marvelous”...

Derpy rushed through the streets, shoving assortments of mail into pony's mailboxes as she zoomed along. Zipping up to one mailbox, she was met with the grizzled old face of a donkey. “Oh hey Mr. Doodle, here's your mail from this week!” she chimed cheerfully, taking his hoof and placing a wad of mail on it then quickly zooming off.

“HEY WAIT!” He screamed out to her. “THIS ISN'T EVEN MY MAIL!”...

Daring zoomed under the large hurtling object, sticking her tongue out at her rival. “NAH-NAH-NUH-NAH-NAH, YOU CAN'T GET ME!” She teased the brute as he pulled a small tree from the ground, about twenty feet in height,a foot thick at the trunk, and hurtled it at Daring. Yet again however, the mare zipped around the thrown object but this time zoomed down and snatched the artifact from the beast's satchel.

“Missed me, missed me, now yah gotta kiss me!” she laughed wildly, before sticking her tongue out at him and promptly taking off into the sky.

“This isn't over Daring Do!” Ahuizotl screamed. “NEXT TIME DARING, NEXT TIME!”...

Nurse Redheart trotted along the hallways of the hospital, stopping for a moment to speak with one of the doctors. “Oh, doctor. I was wondering if you might be able to go over some things with me? Requisitions and such for patients in the hospital,” she asked, the doctor nodding and taking a moment to look over the clipboard list.

As he went over it, he spotted a cardboard box shuffle a bit across the floor. “!” he gasped, making Nurse Redheart jolt back. “Doctor, are you-” she was cut off as he brushed past her and stormed over to the box.

“I knew I'd find you, you-” he cut himself off as he kicked the box, the empty box itself tumbling away. “GUH!” he gasped in disbelief, having been almost certain there was a certain somebody in the box. "Huh... must've been nothing."

“Doctor... is everything... okay?” Nurse Redheart asked worriedly, wondering about the doctor's outburst.

“Nuh... nothing, everything's fine”...

A lone dark furred pony crouched before a certain headstone in the small burial ground. Rain dribbled down, the dark clouds loomed overhead. The rain washed down off the brim of his cowpony hat, and off the black oilskin duster he wore.

A sad, longing expression went across his face as he set down the bouquet of roses. For a moment, he looked over to his own burial spot. The rifle that had once marked the location was now gone, having been given to Princess Celestia herself for what she called, a formal meet and greet.

Looking back to the headstone of his friend, he wiped the water clean from the markings his friend had left. “I hope so... and when you do... I'll be waiting for you. But until we meet again, goodbye... old friend...” he said as he stood up, tipping the brow of his cowpony hat in respect with his front hoof.

His wife stepped up beside him, being the same height as her husband, as she cradled their son in one of her front legs. With the rain still coming down, the duo slowly walked away from the lonely cemetery. On the headstone read...

'Evan Burdick,

loved friend and father,

I'll be back'

“AQUI!” came a voice just as the flash of a camera went of, startling Twilight and having Lassie turn to look over her shoulder. Lassie had been leaning on the passenger side mirror, watching Twilight daydream.

A young bipedal cat morph ran over and began speaking. “Eres muy hermosa y odio pedirte cinco bits Ecuestres para el nuevo juego de mesa que quiero comprar. Si no compra la foto, tendré que gastar mi ahorros para comprarle a mi madre una nueva película para cámara,” the cat boy said. Twilight looked to him with a puzzled expression. Knowing it was Spanish but having missed a few words with how startled she was and how quickly he spoke.

His mother, the gas attendant, came over and Twilight looked to her. “What did he just say?” the Alicorn asked in a curious way.

“He said 'you are very beautiful and I hate to ask you for five Equestrian Bits for the new board game I want to buy. If you don't buy the photo, I'll have to spend my savings to buy my mother new camera film',” the cat woman informed her. Before Twilight could speak however, Lassie merely chuckled.

“Good hustle kid... cuatro,” she replied, offering the cat boy a few bits. The child nodded, taking the money and handing Lassie the photo. “Damn... I look sexy as buck in this photo,” Lassie said, smirking before looking to Twilight. “Here, you should hang onto this... then one day when we're both old wrinkle bags, you can prove to your daughter that we were both MILFs at one point,” she teased, Twilight giving her a sour look.

Lassie merely laughed it off. “Oh relax, I bought it for sentimental purposes,” Lassie laughed, handing over the photo before walking around to the other side of the truck and getting in. Starting the truck and putting it into gear, the trio departed towards the distant horizon, Celestia's setting sun now casting an orange haze over the world.

“Where was I?” Twilight spoke into the microphone as she looked to Lassie, then to her daughter, and finally to the setting sun. “Your father... should I tell you everything about him or not... gosh a pony could go crazy just thinking about it... and in the short time we had together, we loved a lifetime's worth... so I guess I will tell you... he deserves that much,” she said into the microphone.

Lassie lowered a set of aviator sunglasses onto her face as she leaned back, left front leg on the windowcill of the truck door, the other steering. Twilight looked back out to the sunset before opening Evan's journal and began reading.

“How do you start a story? Something I probably should've thought about before I tried this but I'll just wing it, how's that sound?...”

Author's Note

You know, looking back on this, there were so many things I wanted to put in, things that changed over the course of writing it. Wow, so glad I finally came back, I've been wanting to finish this for so long. Anywho,

One final cheers from the character of Evan/Burdy before I move on to my next story

Introduction

How do you start a story? Something I probably should've thought about before I tried this but I'll just wing it, how's that sound? Actually there is one thing we should do first. Before I start this story there is something you should know. My name is Evan Burdick. Yeah, yeah I know, my name has the word 'Dick' in it. That's friggin hilarious, I know, but laugh it up now because it gets old quick.

I'm a white Caucasian male that stands at 6'2" tall. I'm rather large and most people describe me as "Built like a brick shithouse." I don't know why but some people just plain out won't talk to me because they think I'm some mean guy that just breaks stuff all the time because I'm mad. I'm not mad, just clumsy and I tend to swear because I just broke something that's probably important.

You know... just because I have academic grades doesn't make me smart, quite the opposite. Maybe I'm just lucky... maybe the opposite, I dunno. I'm quite dumb actually. Maybe not stupid, but dumb... yeah there's a difference. Sometimes I just can't understand what people are trying to tell me. They hide what they're trying to say under a bunch of fancy words. Just... keep that in mind while I tell this story.

I'm not gonna sugarcoat my life either, try to make myself look like a hero to you. I ain't a good person. Maybe not a terrible person, but definitely not a good person. Stuff just... tends not to go my way. I do things without thinking and it just doesn't go my way, that's all.

I was only 18... 17? Maybe 19... I dunno, I was young and my life was just coming together before all this happened. I had a beautiful truck that I called Cadance. A wonderful collection of guns I had funded myself. I was physically healthy, fit, built... ahhh, those were the days. Anyway back to starting a story... well let's just start off when I ended up in Equestria and all this began...

Author's Note

So for those of you who are in it for the sex scenes or the 'clop' I'll put a warning (Or a notice) at the beginning of chapters with 'explicit' scenes.

Chapter 61

'The law...'

Hearing the voice, I went to turn around but instead was put to the ground as a blunt object of some sort was struck against the back of my knee. I yelped in agony as I fell to the ground but didn't even get a word as my unknown assailant pulled a length of wood across the front of my throat, beginning to choke me out with brutal force.

Time itself seemed to slow to a standstill as I gagged and struggled beneath a forceful presence. My eyes clenched shut, a tear leaving my good eye as what seemed like the last remnants of oxygen left my lungs.

As time continued dragging to a standstill I felt a deepening lust inside of me... something I hadn't felt for a very long time. A red darkness filled my inner being, my very soul itself swelling with my increasing hunger.

My eye shot open, brows furrowed, the world coming to. The corners of my vision were cracked with a blood red tint, blurring out most of my view. I cocked my body to the left and drove a hard elbow to the figure behind me, getting a winded gasp as a response.

Reaching behind my shoulder with both hands I grabbed the assailant by the hide of his neck and yanked him over my body, hammering him down hard into the ground. He let out another winded wheeze as his body squirmed for air.

Then it struck me. As I gazed upon the withering stallion, I realized he was a royal guard. Time seemed to slow again as, out of the corner of my eye, I spotted another stallion jabbing a spear my way.

Leaning back I dodged the strike and firmly established a grip on the staff of the spear, using like a lever to flip the stallion onto his back with unrelenting force. The stallion went to move but I drove the butt of the spear into his gut, not yet wanting to kill him.

'Why in Equestria is the Roya-' my thoughts were cut off as a club, perhaps a baton, struck across my jaw, cocking my head to one side but in my ferocious state, barely even fazing me. My head slowly turned to see the white stallion standing there, awestruck that I was still standing, let alone barely dazed.

I drove my forehead into his helmet, the sheer raw force slamming him to the ground. “ENOUGH!” Boomed a grisly, older voice. I pivoted on my heels to see a rather older stallion, yet even still he was dressed in royal guard uniform.

“What's the meaning of this?!” I snarled, fists clenched and ready to go. The hunger for battle was ever growing inside of me, threatening to overcome all my senses and send me into a frenzy.

“You're under arrest Mr. Burdick. Stand down, put your hooves... err, whatever, behind your head and get on the ground, face down,” he barked. I remembered him now. That sergeant, the one from the gala... the one of whom mistook me for a new recruit who went AWOL... what was he doing here?!

“Piss off. You guys attacked me!” I got ready to fight again but flinched as something stabbed into my neck... something small and...

In natural instinct I grabbed at the thing and froze as I realized it was a needle, or rather, a dart. My phobia of needles set in deep and I pulled the dart from my neck, flinging it as quickly as I could as my body shuddered.

'Fuckin' needles!' I thought, a glimpse from my peripheral vision catching sight of a dressed up mare in a suit wielding some ungodly contraption. I spun, cocking my arms to my side as I got ready for a fight. I felt a little... strange, to say the least.

The sergeant called out. “Detective! Run!” he yelled. I could sense him charging and spun to meet him with a high kick to the side of the head, the force of which knocked him unconscious and to the ground. I felt another needling pain as a second dart jabbed into my neck. I flinched but had the needle out in moments.

My senses started to fail me as a hoof struck across my jaw without my foreknowledge of somepony swinging at me. I twisted my upper body to meet my new attacker, driving a fist into his armored chest and not getting a favored reaction as the stallion returned my strike with one of his own.

I felt another dart ping into my bicep this time but didn't have time to worry about it now. The stallion took a third swing which I brushed aside, then grabbed him by the hide of the neck and pulled him into a grappling hold.

A fourth dart stung my side just before I swung the stallion's body in a large arc, bringing his body crashing down into the ground with enough force to make him go silent... then it hit me, I couldn't hear much, aside from my slowing heartbeat.

I managed to see a hoof flying my way and dodged to the side, my whole world spinning into a fazed blur, almost as though I was intoxicated. I tried for a nice swing but my whole body felt impaired. I swung a wild haymaker that still hit home with enough force to knock the punk stallion to the ground but also sent me staggering about.

I saw a stallion charging at my, spear in hoof. I crouched slightly, then leapt straight up with a bit of twirl in my motion. My first strike was with the tip of my right boot as my body spun in the air. The second strike was with the base of my left as I tried to perform a fancy kick. It worked... though not as nicely as I'd hoped.

The kick was enough, from what I could tell, to knock the stallion out cold, however with my impaired state I also couldn't land afterwards and crashed to the ground. A heavyweight stallion came crashing down on me, trying to brutally hold me down. He was a good hitter, I'd give him that, though it may be the fact he was holding down an impaired man and beating him while he was down.

My feet snugged between our bodies and I kicked him off from atop of me then rolled backwards and to my feet, staggering horribly as I did so. Another dart jabbed into me, this time in the bicep of my right arm. I tensed aggressively, quickly brushing off all the needles which were no doubt pumping something into my system.

In my fueled anger I rushed forwards, taking another dart to the chest but not bothering. I could tell I didn't have much time left, but by god I wasn't gonna go down without a fight. I cocked back for a wild swing, but my aim was sloppy and my speed was below par.

The mare in suit ducked my powerful blow and drove a strike of her own into my gut, making me lurch forwards and nearly double over. She supported my weight but only to jab a larger needle into my ass and push the plunger all the way down.

The effects weren't as near instantaneous as movies but by the time I had staggered back a few steps the world was spinning beneath me. I felt as though there was an earthquake, or that somepony had sped up the rotation of the world... if this world even rotated.

I staggered and held myself in a defensive stance, but was barely able to comprehend anything beyond two feet in front of me, everything was just a blur of motions all blended together.

I felt the tip of a baton strike across my jaw, nearly twisting my entire body in a twirl, but I managed to stand my ground, leaning back for one last swing. “Fuck you-” I spat out. If I even managed to speak I wasn't sure, maybe it was just a thought that didn't make it to words. My whole body moved with my strike, my knuckles striking home across something fleshy and soft, with a little bit of bone behind it. “Asshole,” was the last word to leave my mouth as my body plummeted to the ground, but I didn't even feel myself finish my decent as my world went dark...

* * *

My world was dark. I could... feel, that I was awake, though bitterly groggy and a pounding headache that made me wish I was still unconscious. At first I thought as though I was in a room that was eternally dark, however I soon noticed the presence of a bag over my head.

Not far away, perhaps a few feet, spoke a set of voices. However, due to my intoxicated state, I couldn't tell for certain if they were right there in front of me or much further away.

The first voice was grisly, with a masculine tune about it... heck, it kinda reminded me of the crispy voice of Danny Glover. “That's not... whatever it is.” A second voice pitched up in response.

“Like hell it is! We have all the evidence! The holy cross shirt was even found at the princesses house in his room. Shit, the only thing we don't have is a witness cause the prick kills everypony nearby!” The second voice was feminine.

The first voice, Danny... I'm gonna call him Danny until I figure out what his real name is. Danny spoke up in retort. “No buckin' way... no. The one I saw... the one 'I' witnessed... it... it had... uhm... breasts,” he said, a little unsure about the last part.

“TCH! You're such a pig!” The second sounded displeased with Danny but he spoke up in immediate defense.

“No, no. I'm serious. Right here, there were big... uhm... mammary glands,” I could feel a hoof hovering near my chest and chose that moment to groan out in response.

“Oh, splendid. He's awake. Saves me the effort of trying to wake him up.” I tried to move but found my hands bound at the wrists behind the back rest of the chair and my legs wrapped to the chair legs. A pair of hooves, presumably hindlegs, bucked me over. I hit my head off the ground and flinched, my head throbbing.

“Kid! This isn't right! We don't know it was him!” Danny shouted but the second just scoffed.

“Damn straight we do! Shit, Heartigan this bastard is the only one capable of killing of this many guards and we have the evidence to prove it!” I tried to speak but suddenly found myself choking as water was poured on the bag which was covering my head.

I gagged and choked as the water began to suffocate me. I withered and squirmed but being tied to the chair, along with my condition, kept my actions limited. "That's for all those guards, you prick!" the mare shouted as I was drowned beneath the tide of water.

“HEY!” yelled Danny as the water stopped. “You could kill it. Shit, you dosed it with enough tranquilizer to kill a dozen elephants. I'm surprised it's even awake. Just one of those darts has enough juice to knock out a dozen ponies! I even told you not to take them!” Danny shouted but the second was again quick to snap back.

“And it's a good thing I didn't listen. He may very well have just killed us off if I hadn't knocked him out. Now you see how dangerous he truly is.” The water torture started again, causing me to panic, my heart starting to race out of control and being unable to hold my breath.

Water traveled not only into my lungs but also up my nose, giving me the oh-so terrible feel of being drowned. The water stopped before Danny howled in anger. “I SAID STOP IT! We should have taken a peaceful approach to it, but instead you just attacked it. That!... is why it attacked back!” The water was held at bay as my seat was lifted back upright.

“Well then... Heartigan, if you're so positive perhaps you can talk to him about it,” the second snarled as the bag was pulled off my head. My vision was blinded by bright lights... or perhaps they were quite dim but due to my head being in a bag for... however long, my eyes couldn't adjust just yet.

I clenched my eyes shut and swung my head to and fro, also now realizing I was missing my eye patch which would make things slightly more tricky.

“Definitely not it. The thing that attacked me had long hair and wasn't so... old,” Danny spoke and the second just laughed.

“Old? Coming from you that's hilarious,” she laughed and he just sighed irratably.

“Seriously Keyes. This is serious. This thing isn't what attacked me and-” the second cut off Danny.

“Heartigan... it's him. And the jury will agree with me. No lawyer in the land will defend his case,” the feminine one spoke before her presence departed. I groaned and turned my head side to side before slowly cracking open my eyes, my left eye blurred beyond comprehension.

“Who...” I whispered, being greeted by a chuckle.

“Heartigan. Detective Heartigan. Most folks call me Hearty.” His voice was gentle and caring. “I'm surprised you can even speak. Hell, I was pretty pissed when Keyes brought you back all dosed up to Tartarus. I told her not to bring those things. We use 'em to tranq Ursas, not... well, regardless. It only takes one dart to tranquilize an Ursa Minor. I didn't think you'd ever wake up, and here you are... impressive,” he mentioned and I puked on the floor in front of my feet.

“Snap. Sorry, I uhh... you'll probably feel like you have the hangover from hell. Here, drink this,” he said, bringing the lip of a bottle to my mouth. Very gingerly I took small sips of whatever the liquid was. It was... naturally sweet, with pulp. “It's Aloe Vera water. It'll help with the headache. Listen, I know it wasn't you. I'll defend you in this case, you have my word on that,” Heartigan, at least that's what he addressed himself as, informed me before he too left.

I sat in silence with myself, trying to piece together everything. I wasn't sure how much time passed before a white mare came into the room, her hair a nearly matching shade but with streaks of gold in it. Her eyes were also an amber gold as well.

“Dominic Gravelli,” she told me and I swallowed hard, not really understanding what in blue blazes she was talking about. “Who was he?” she asked and I shook my head, panting heavily and perspiration pouring down my face... or perhaps it was water from my water torture.

“Wha... I dunno... who is he?” I asked and she just scoffed, turning to leave. That's when I noticed a second, hulking presence in the room. I... I remembered that stallion... his face was mostly covered behind a royal guard helmet but... 'Where have I seen him before?' I asked myself.

The mare's voice caught my attention. “TCH! As if he was just another face... just a name, along the long list of ponies you've slaughtered,” she scoffed, scowling to herself as she left. “Lug.” He voice was the last thing I heard as the brutish stallion back-hoofed me to the ground, but with such force I was out before I hit the ground...

* * *

My handcannon was leveled at my hip, each gunshot was like a crack of thunder echoing down my ear canal. The stallion was tossed over his desk with several gunshot wounds in his chest.

Time quickly rewound and the scene played over again, my Desert Eagle pounding away at him. His body was once again flung over his desk.

Yet again time rewound and this time the scene played out in frantic pace the gunshots sounding like that of a fully automatic weapon. His body tossed at rapid speed.

One final time the scene was rewound, every shot slowed to hundreds of a second. I could literally see the massive .50 caliber slug exit the barrel at super sonic speeds, the fire ring from the sonic boom following it.

The slide slammed back, spitting out a smoking casing before rocking forwards and loading a fresh shell into the sizable handcannon. Each bullet drilled a gaping hole in his chest, blowing out his backside with a spew of blood. I could see each shot ripple a tremendous and most deadly shock wave through his body as he was tossed over his desk.

There was a clanging... like metal on metal. A voice yelling... the clanging...

* * *

“Hey! Hey inmate! Yeah you! Get up, yah got visitors scumbag,” spoke a voice, the metal clanging being that of his baton being pounded against the bars of the cell door.

'UGH! I'M IN A PRISON CELL!' I thought to myself before the comforting sight of my friends put me to slight ease. “UGH! Mom! Lassie... guys! Get me outta here!” I gasped in panic, about to jump up but crashing to the floor as I found my legs shackled together along with my wrists.

I struggled to my feet, hobbling along to the cell door. “Guys... guys...” I gasped, swallowing hard, already sweating. Twilight had been crying, I could see it in her bloodshot eyes, and I could tell she was holding back more tears.

Before I could say a word, she ran off, Rarity, Pinkie, Dash and Fluttershy chasing after her. Applejack stayed and gave me a glare. “Did yah do it?” she asked and I was shocked from her tone.

“Do what? What did I do?! What's happening?!” I asked in a panicked tone.

“They say yah gone and done killed dozens a royal guards!” Applejack snapped and I was nearly thrown back from the information.

“What?!” I gasped in complete shock.

“Don't try an' play stupid... answer me seriously, er not at all... did yah do it?!” she asked in the most defining tone I had ever heard from her before as she leaned forwards and stared deep into my eyes.

“Did-you-do-it?!” she asked in such a serious tone she actually forced aside her usual accent and spoke with a normal one.

“No! Applejack I swear to goddess I never killed any guards. Please, yah gotta believe me! Why would I kill them?” I asked and she seemed to be thrown off by my response.

“Ah... oh wow, yah really don't have anything tah do with it do yah?” she asked and I shook my head.

“Please... AJ, I... why? What's going on?! Why is this happening?!” I began to further panic.

“Well... ah reckon ah can fill yah in. Guess over the last few months somepony's been makin' a habit a killin' Celestia's royal guard ponies. 'Parently they been killed with something like yer uhh... gun thingy... so, yah know... bein' the only one in Equestria with that kinda technology and such... hooves are pointed at you,” she spoke and I felt my heart sink.

“No... no-no, it wasn't me! I-” Applejack put a hoof to my mouth.

“Relax. Ah can see it yer eyes. Yah didn't do it. Don't worry. Ah'll comfort Twi an' the others an' make sure they know yer innocent. Just a big serious misunderstandin'... but yah best not be lyin' tah me, er else,” she warned.

“Applejack. You have my word. I never killed any guards,” I swore and she nodded. Lassie stood there with a cake, blinking in disbelief.

“Oh... well then... I uhh... I guess this thing is useless,” she commented and both Applejack and myself looked to her and her cake.

Applejack rose a brow and I spoke both our minds. “Why... what's with the cake? Why is it useless? Does it do anything special?” I asked but my canine just shook her head.

“Nah. I just pick-pocketed the keys for your cell and shackles off a guard and put them in the cake but... well, if you're innocent then I guess you won't need them to escape,” she mentioned, AJ gasping in response.

“LASSIE!” She scorned but the dog just shrugged.

“Chilax dude. I thought he was guilty. Hell, everypony does. I figured if things got real bad, like if they sentenced him to death or something he could at least escape... you know, worst case scenario,” she said, AJ just shaking her head.

The guard showed back up and spoke up. “Okay, visit's over. I gotta get this punk to the court room,” he commented. Lassie just smucked the cake in his face.

“Whatever bozo.” She smirked as they left. The guard blinked and I couldn't help but chuckle. Lassie had attitude, that was for sure. The guard looked to me, grunting while wiping his face clean and tossing the clumps of cake at me. I ducked quickly and dodged the mess which landed on my pillow, which was a burlap sack filled with something fluffy.

Several guards formed up with spears and swords, surrounding my cell as one certain guard opened my cell... it was Shining, Twilight's elder brother.

He stepped forwards and I stood up, everypony quickly taking a step or two back in fear. I was dressed in classic black and white stripped jail uniform as I waddled towards Shining who stepped back another few feet.

I stopped a few feet short and swallowed deep. “Let's go,” I told him and he blinked before letting out a deep exhale and grabbing my chains and leading me away. As he led me down several hallways I noticed one particular stallion... the big one. Where did I know him from?

His armor was particularly bulky. Sure he was bigger than every other pony here but his armor seemed bigger than what it should be. As we got to the main hallways of the castle we were shrouded with camera ponies who constantly flashed pictures of me as we made our way to the courtroom.

Entering the large room, more cameras flashed as they led me down a walkway and to a desk near the front. I was seated and the guards left though they didn't go far. Heartigan sat beside me and it was at this time I noticed the one side of his face was severely burned. Burned to the point that his cheekbone and jaw were exposed and his eye was impacted.

He noticed me staring and made mention of it. “Whoever actually killed the guards... did this to me,” he mentioned just as whom I presumed to be the judge entered the room. The judge addressed everypony and announced the case would start.

The judge looked to me with a most sickening glare. “Mr. Burdick... before we actually do start... I wish you to know the only reason we don't just throw you away to never see Celestia's glorious sun is due to your status as Princess Twilight Sparkle's most faithful student.” I nodded and she began with the formalities of informing everypony that it was the state versus myself on the trial of me killing all those guards and ponies which I never did.

Right off the bat my opposition started off stronger than I could ever believe showing the jury all sorts of pictures of the dead guards along with evidence they recovered and how a forensics team pieced it back to me. I leaned over to Heartigan. “You guys have bullet forensics team?” I asked and he grunted.

Whispering to me he spoke. “It's strange kid... beyond strange. Just after it started happening they created a team they called 'forensic research'. Right off they bat they seemed to know exactly what they were doing, right to the point you'd think they had been doing it for decades... it's like somepony taught them,” he mentioned.

Only an hour into the case I seemed swamped by evidence, dozens upon dozens of guards killed with evidence against me, but irregardless this evidence didn't seem to match me at all. Keyes, the investigator against me pulled up some files. “Your honor... jury, I would like you to examine case number seventy-eight against Mr. Burdick. Guard Solar Wing was shot three times in the back and once point blank in the face... execution style. If this is how he acts on his spare time we cannot, under any circumstance whatsoever, allow this abomination to walk free.” The image was projected onto a screen and for the first time in the case I objected.

“Objection your honor! Those wounds are not from a fifty caliber handgun!” I shouted, knowing full well my handgun would've blown the stallion's head to mist, not just leave a gaping hole in his forehead.

“Overruled Mr. Burdick, sit down!” she banged her little mallet. Keyes turned to me as a stallion wheeled out a little cart.

Keyes spoke up in an all too cocky way, almost smug. “You are right about one thing Mr. Burdick. Those wounds are not from your fifty caliber. They're from your fourty-five Auto-Colt-Pistol. The H-K M-K-23,” she said, lifting a bag containing said firearm.

I was baffled she knew such terms, considering firearms didn't exist in this world at all before I arrived. “His fingerprints... are all over this firearm, and the wound cavities of every single victim match this firearm's projectiles your honor,” she commented and I curled my fists.

“Objection your honor! I only just received that firearm a few days ago. I never killed any of-” the judge silence me again with the mallet.

“Silence! Be seated Mr. Burdick. If you wish to object do so in a civilized manner,” she ordered. I breathed heavy and from the corner of my eye spotted my mother, wiping tears from her face.

“Your honor... jury, I only just received that handgun a few days ago. There is no possible way I could've used it to kill all these guards,” I replied and Keyes spoke up.

“Do you have proof of this?” she asked and I went to speak then bit my lip. The only ponies that were there when Kianna gave me the gun were Big Mac... the fillies and...

“LASSIE!” I shouted as I stood up. I gulped then sat back down. “I have a witness your honor. My dog, Lassie,” I said and Keyes just scoffed.

“A dog isn't a witness-” she was cut off by Lassie's voice.

“They're not? Then what do you call someone who was there when that wacky lady gave him the gun?” Lassie asked, everypony gasping at the fact my dog was talking. “Okay... seriously...” she sighed and the judged tapped her little mallet.

Keyes went to speak but the judge spoke first. “Seeing as how things are... strange enough, I will allow this dog to testify. Dog-” Lassie cut her short.

“It's Lassie,” she interrupted, much to the displeasure of the judge.

“Fine, so be it. Lassie, you may take the stand.” With that Lassie took a seat up on the trial stand and took oath. “Ms. Lassie, if you would please recall the day that... Mr. Burdick received the weapon that was used in these murders?” she asked and Lassie nodded.

“Oh yeah, it was crazy. First we were attacked by this alien or something, then I hid the kids and Derpy in the basement then Mac came and we totally thought he was the alien, but then we found it again... or rather, it found us, but there wasn't just one, there was three, and they were hunting us. Next thing we know we're like surrounded by the three of them thinking they're going to kill us then that crazy gun lady was like 'BAM-BAM-BAM',” Lassie acted out like she was fanning the hammer on a revolver. “And then another one snuck up behind her but Evan showed up with this big ass gun and was like 'DUD-DUD-DUD-DUD-DUD-DUD!'” She acted out like she was shooting a machinegun.

“Then the lady was all like 'Thanks for saving me!' and then she gave him the pistol, something about how he's used it before..." she calmed down from her elaborate story telling then cleared her throat and spoke more calmly. "And that's it.” She gave her... outlandish testimony, and Keyes spoke up.

“If that... ridiculous story, was even true... you said this... lady, said Mr. Burdick has used the firearm before?” she asked and Lassie nodded.

“Yeah... I kinda remember her saying something like tha...” she trailed off as she realized she had walked right into a trap.

“So it's very well a possibility that this... gun woman, was keeping his weapon for him as to hide the evidence from his residence, so that if the guards or police were to ever conduct a search, he'd appear innocent... we were just lucky and caught him with his pants down... your honor, that will be all,” Keyes stated, Lassie sighing in defeat.

The judge looked to me. “Is there anypony else?” she asked and I bit my lip but Hearty stood up.

“I'll testify your honor,” he said in his ever crispy voice that made me think of nothing but Danny Glover. The judge rose a brow but said nothing to detest. Heartigan took to the stand and made oath before taking a seat.

“Alright inspector-” the judge began but Hearty cut her short.

“Just detective,” he told her and she sighed, rather irritably. I suppose it was bad, even for him, to interrupt the judge.

“Proceed. What have you to say that could possibly show Mr. Burdick is innocent?” she inquired.

“Well... it all started a few months back. My partner and I were investigating a suspicious figure...”

* * *

Third person,

Months prior...

“Heartigan, look... there's our guy,” the white stallion said to the darker grey one. Heartigan took out his binoculars and peered down the street to the cloaked figure.

“Damn straight it is! Let's move on 'em and figure out what he's been up to,” the older inspector replied, both grabbing their nightsticks and moving towards the target. As they got closer and closer the target swiftly went down an alleyway, the two inspectors following in close pursuit.

Seeing the figure not too far off, the younger white stallion hollered out. “FREEZE!” He yelled, only making the suspect run.

“Shit kid, why'd you spoke 'em? Quick!” Heartigan and the younger stallion chased after the bipedal figure who fled into a building via a backdoor to which Heartigan and the white stallion followed.

Rushing down the tight corridor and taking a sharp turn, Heartigan skittered and crashed to the floor, slipping on the glistening floor and dampening his fur in a liquid that coated the floor. The other stallion skidded to a stop but Heartigan waved at him. “Keep going, don't lose 'em. I'll be right behind you!” he shouted, sniffing his damp fur and taking note it smelled particularly strange, but didn't have time to think about what exactly it smelled like.

Getting up and rushing down the halls, he could hear voices down the way. Skidding around the corner he spotted his partner just as the stallion clubbed at the back of the perp's knee, bringing the foe to a tumbling halt.

“Alright, FREEZE MOTHER-BUCKER!” The white stallion yelled, getting close to take a second swing. However, just as he did, a knife slid down a guide hooked up to a wrist gauntlet and the foe slashed the white stallion's throat wide open.

Heartigan's eyes went wide as he watched his partner collapse, grasping his gushing throat. Letting out a roar of anger, the grey stallion charged after the foe and barged through the doorway where he'd last seen the killer go through.

He nearly skidded to a stop as he met with her, just a few feet away. “ON THE GROUND! NOW!” Heartigan ordered but the figure just tossed aside the cloak, revealing feminine features.

“I'd... prefer not to,” she said, lifting a cigarette into her mouth. “You... have a light?” she asked and the stallion readied himself into a combat stance. “Me... oh I have a light,” she said, pulling out a lighter from her pocket at blinding speed, making Heartigan jump back in a defensive way, only making the woman laugh as she lit her smoke.

“Drop it!” Heartigan ordered and the woman rose a brow.

“Oh... you mean my knife. Pfft, whatever, I don't need it anymore,” she replied, the Zippo still burning as she dismantled the knife wrist gauntlet and tossed it aside. Heartigan still stood his ground and the woman chuckled.

“Or did you perhaps mean my lighter... tell me inspector... do you enjoy the smell of kerosene?” she asked and it was that moment he realized not only what the smell was, but what his fur was soaked with. Looking to the floor he noticed it was sopping wet with kerosene.

“UGHAHHH!” Heartigan gasped just before the woman spoke.

“What's the old saying inspector?" she asked before smirking. "Oh yes... I remember,” the woman said as she went to toss the still burning Zippo. “You have the right to remain silent.” The inspector watched in horror as the naked flame touched the liquid, lighting the floor ablaze and quickly catching him as well.

The woman leapt out a nearby window as the fur of the stallion burned, and the skin on his faze sizzled. His screams of agony echoed out the window as he thrashed about...

* * *

“I ended up tumbling off the second story balcony... lucky some kids had busted open a fire hydrant and were playing in the water... but I still lost part of my face... now I gotta ask you... reckoning... just say, we'll pretend, and I mean this is a far shot... that this bulky old man looks like the female that attacked me... why in all Equestria, if he killed my partner in cold blood then torched me... would I, in a million years, defend his flank?” Heartigan asked.

Keyes sighed. “Well... Heartigan, as interesting as your story may be, I'd like the jury to know shortly after those events Heartigan became disgruntled and obsessed with this case... to the point he was reassigned to office work only,” she mentioned, Heartigan looking away in shame.

She walked up and looked him square in the face. “If that will be all... you washed up... old... senile bastard,” she whispered the last part but both I and the judge heard it, the judge banging her mallet.

“Enough Keyes. Your point has been made, there's no reason to harass the opposition!” With that Heartigan came and sat back down beside me, myself leaning over.

“Is that why you're helping me?” I asked but didn't get an answer as Keyes spoke up.

“I would like to bring the attention of another matter that is partially related. Do you all remember the Manehatten incident?” she asked then looked to one of the guards. “How many died... were killed, in that single night?” she asked the guard who rubbed the back of his neck.

“Uhh... if I remember correctly... three hundred and... eighty-ish?” he replied.

“Three hundred and sixty seven... in a single night, your honor. Just over the sum of three hundred ponies massacred at the docks and surrounding area. Another twenty found dead on the streets. And forty at that warehouse... three hundred and sixty seven lives ended in less than six hours... I want you all to think about that,” she stated and I gulped. I hadn't killed those guards... but the mobsters... that entire mob family... I had killed. That... I was guilty of.

“And the single assailant wore a most particular black shirt with a white cross... a shirt, which I will mention, was found and recovered from the room of none other than... Evan Burdick,” she stated, holding up the shirt, everypony gasping in the room.

Dammit... I should've gotten rid of that ridiculous shirt when I had the chance. Crap, why couldn't I have changed it to a white skull like Derreck's?

Heartigan stood up in protest. “Objection your honor. This has nothing to do with-” he was cut short by Keyes.

“This has everything to do with Mr. Burdick's case. It isn't about a single murder. It's about all his combined killings. He's a sociopath that needs to be put down!” she yelled, Heartigan grimacing.

I had my head in my hands and arguing amongst the detectives started to break out. The judge was quick to start slamming her mallet thing, demanding there be order in the court. As things settled down the judge looked to me. “Mr. Burdick... how to you plea against these allegations?” she asked and I swallowed hard, a deafening silence in the room.

“I... I did it,” I whispered, though to myself it sounded like thunder in my ears.

“Excuse me? Can you speak up Mr. Burdick? So that the jury can hear?” she asked. I pressed my face into my palms.

“I... I'm guilty... I did it,” I said aloud. I heard Twilight burst into a sobbing wreck and rush out of the room just as everypony gasped, including Heartigan.

Keyes seemed dumbfounded. “You... you did?” she asked as though she didn't believe what I was saying.

“Not the guards... but the mobsters... yes,” I replied, brutally honest. There was no way around it. That shirt, along with everything else for the crime scene, pinned me in a way I couldn't possibly lie about. I didn't even have an alibi.

“BUT!...” I trailed off. “It was because they kidnapped a friend of mine. I was-” Keyes cut me short.

“You acted outside the law with lethal and illegal means. Mr. Burdick you are a criminal!” she challenged me.

“I was trying to rescue my friend!” I shouted back.

“YOU WERE BLOODTHIRSTY!” She hollered and the judge again began slamming her mallet, demanding order in the court.

The judge just began shaking her head but Keyes spoke up. “You're honor... I would like to call to the stand, Flim and Flam,” she stated, the names perking my ears. The two brothers slowly started walking up the aisles.

“Wha-what are they...” I was stunned. Why were they here? They took to the stand, and took oath. Even so, I felt a little more comforting. At least now I had somepony on my team.

“Mr. Flim, Mr. Flam,” Keyes began. “Would you please explain your relationship with Mr. Burdick?” she asked. At first I thought maybe I had an ally but in seconds I realized it was far worse than that.

“He's abusive!” Flim wailed right off the line.

“He threatens us over everything. Why, when he was first arrived he purchased fuel off us and then shorted us, threatening us if we didn't sell it for less!” Flam cried, making me groan. I put my elbow to the table, my arm straight up and dipped my head into my palm.

“Why, it's so awful he forces us to build things for him for free, never giving us so much as a bit!” Flim sobbed, though I could tell it was faked. My body tensed... these guys were... throwing me to the wolves.

“And the Manehatten incident... he had us build him the equipment to terrorize those poor ponies and threatened us that if we ever talked... ohhhhhh it's horrible!” Flam added in, pretending to faint. I stood up in protest.

“That's bullshit! YOU FUCKERS PRESSURED ME INTO TRANSPORTING THAT SHIT YOU STOLE!” I roared, taking everyone in the courtroom by utter surprise. “YOU SONS A BITCHES ALREADY HAD THAT STUFF PRE-MADE, AND I ONLY DID IT CAUSE!... FUCK!” I swore, slamming my fists into the metal table.

Everypony just looked to me, some in fear, some in complete shock, the guards ready to jump on me.

Flim and Flam both squealed in horror. “Just like that! Just like that!” they both cried in unison. “He acts like that and forces us to do his dirty work. And what are we to do?!” They cried.

The judge began to slam her mallet. “I think I've heard enough. Mr. Burdick... under regular circumstances I would have you sent to the dungeons for the rest of eternity, never again to see the light of Celestia's beautiful sun... but this case has been... strange to say the least. I, and most likely the jury as well, will need some time to think this over. You shall remain detained in the castle dungeon until further notice. Guards... remove him at once!” the guards swarmed me, getting into a defensive formation but I just groaned.

“Don't bother... I'll go quietly,” I muttered, having lost my will to fight. I stood up and offered Shining my chains. He looked to me with disgust.

“You were right,” he spat and I rose a brow. “When you told me at Chrysalis's wedding... not to judge before I got to know somepony. I thought you were an alright pony, far better than any stallion my sister has ever associated with... but now I see you're just scum.” With that he began to lead me away. We stopped just briefly at the courtroom doors where my mother and the others were waiting. I could see her eyes, see the hurt behind all those swelled up tears.

Most of all though... of all the pain, all the death-defying things I had ever been through in life. The slap she laid across my cheek hurt more than anything I had ever endured. The others all glared at me, a deep sense of guilt building inside of me.

I will never wish to myself that I would change killing those stallions to save Derpy... but I did wish, now more than ever... that I had never met Flim and Flam. Just before we could leave, Heartigan came racing over.

“Wait, Shining! Just... I just need a few seconds. I know the case is over but it'll only be brief, I swear!” he pleaded and Shining grunted.

“Fine! But get on with it!” he snarled and the inspector, or detective, or whatever he was, nodded in appreciation.

“Kid... what does nine mm mean?” he asked and I rose a brow. “Like... the number nine, then two Ms behind it?” he asked and my eye went wide.

“Nine millimeter!” I gasped and he nodded.

“And uhh... there was one more word bene-” I cut him short.

“Luger! UGH! 9mm Luger!” I gasped and he nodded.

“Yeah, that's it! Wait... what does that mean?” he asked.

“It's a type of handgun cartridge, much smaller than a .45ACP. How do you-” he cut me short and pulled me close.

“Listen... back when this started happening and I was still a detective... on just about every single scene with a dead guard there'd be these little golden things, and on the bottom it was labeled 9mm Luger... not .45ACP,” he mentioned and my eyes went wide.

The evidence... was falsified. “I can't get into forensics... I taught Keyes everything she knows. I was her... mentor in a way. I thought she'd clue this together as well but it seems that she's blind to everything and just jumping to conclusions,” he told me.

“So... so what do you want me to do?” I asked and he just sighed.

“Just... do what you do best,” he said and before I could say anything Shining began dragging me along again.

Bringing me down to my cell, he pushed me in. I nearly stumbled over my shackled together feet and turned to him. “Shining-” he cut me short.

“Don't... just don't. You've already caused too much pain,” he said as he looked to me with great disgust. “They shoulda locked you up a long time ago.” Heslammed the cell door shut and locked it before leaving.

I flopped down and put my head into the palms of my hands as I began to cry. Not soon had I started then a gruff voice picked up and I looked to the cell door. “Crying? Really? What are you five?” he asked, my large, and perhaps my only... hopefully, friend.

“Derreck... Derreck what am I gonna do?” I sobbed tearfully and he rubbed his chin before patting his belly. “Feed me. That cake Lassie made looks pretty good,” he stated and I blinked before he pointed to my pillow where chunks still remained.

I grabbed him a bit but he just scoffed. “Don't be a fucking Jew. Give me all of it or I won't help you,” he ordered and I scrapped it all up and handed him the globs of cake. Most of which however he just flicked to the side and found a set of keys in the cake.

“UGHAHHHH! How'd you know those were there?” I asked in disbelief as he opened my cell door and popped off my shackles.

“Don't you remember what Lassie told you?” he asked, her words coming back to me.

'Nah. I just pick-pocketed the keys for your cell and shackles off a guard and put them in the cake...' and the memory of how she splatted it in the guard's face and how he wiped it off and tossed the plastered cake into my cell.

“Amazing... what now?” I asked.

“Well... what now?” he asked. I remembered what Hearty had said about forensics and how the team was just developed at the drop of a hat yet performed almost too well at their jobs. I also recalled him mentioning the 9mm Luger casings.

“To the forensics lab!” I noted and he nodded before we both snuck away. We didn't get far, not even out of the cell area, before we were tasked with the problem of a guard stationed near the exit. “Shit...” I muttered but Derreck shook his head.

“We need somepony to take your spot,” he commented before sneaking up behind the stallion and grabbing him. In mere seconds Derreck choked out the stallion and dragged him back to my cell where he tossed him on the bed and covered him up, shackling his hooves together behind his back and wrapping cloth around his mouth and tying it in a knot so he couldn't scream for help if he came to.

We began towards our objective again, sneaking out of the dungeon and into the castle, having to take many detours to avoid guard patrols. Coming around a corner Derreck pulled me back, holding a hand over my mouth.

We both peeked around the corner were two guards stood idle and present. “Look... damn bozos... this is the only other hallway we can go down... or we have to go back and try another,” Derreck mentioned.

“So what do we do?” I asked...

* * *

Third person...

The two stallions stood guard, silent yet ever vigilant. A faint tinging noise caught the younger stallion's attention, his ear flapping. “You hear that?” he asked the older, more experienced, stallion whom just shrugged.

“You do this job enough, you realize that this castle makes all kinda noises at night... probably just a rodent,” he commented. The younger stallion blinked then spoke in protest.

“We should investigate it!” he tried to order the older stallion who again just shrugged but this time with a sigh.

“You want to investigate it? Go ahead. I'm just going to keep guard here. Say the princess comes by and sees we're not on guard? We'll be doing latrine duty for a month,” he informed the younger stallion who just scoffed.

“Fine, but I'm going to see what it is!” he said valiantly and the other just chuckled.

“Don't be disappointed when it's just wind whistling through a slightly opened window. I doubt the princess will give you a medal for closing it,” he laughed, the gold stallion trotting down the hall and around the corner.

His light blue eyes scanned the area but all the torches had been put out. He went to call out for the other stallion but a hard swing cracked him across the jaw with so much force it knocked his helmet off.

A grisly, venerated old man swung him around and curled his massive arms around the gold stallion's throat, choking him out in seconds flat. The scarred man just exhaled deeply. Before jamming the gold stallion with a blue mane into a suit of display armor.

'What about the other?' asked a voice in his head but the brutish man just smirked.

“I got it covered...” he replied.

The older stallion just sighed to himself, wondering what in blue blazes was taking the younger recruit so long to inspect the 'suspicious' noise. Before he could call out, he saw a large cardboard box scurry past.

“!” He gasped to himself as he watched it sneak into the washroom. He immediately chased after it and found himself looking at the large box as it sat idle in the middle of the room. “Okay Flash seriously... I'll have you reprimanded for this!” he snarled but got no response.

With great curiosity he walked forwards and gave the box a small kick but wasn't expecting for a massive figure to emerge and pull him into the box. The washroom was filled with the echo of flesh on flesh. THUMP, THUMP, THUMP, THUMP, THUMP!

Everything went silent before the stallion's body was ejected from the box and into a vacant stall. The man reached up out of the box and slammed the door shut before waddling away in the box once more...

Elsewhere in the castle two stallions trotted along on patrol before coming to a stop as they spotted a box. Getting closer for an inspection the one guard noticed a note attached to the box. 'To be transported to forensics lab for examination.' The one stallion looked to the other.

“Isn't the forensics lab just down the way?” he asked, the other nodded. “Come on, let's get this thing down there.” The first went to lift it but nearly wheezed as he realized it was extremely heavy.

“Celestia... it weighs a ton!” he gasped, the two stallions trying together but barely able to budge it. “Huh... no wonder those lab geeks ditched it... probably too heavy to lift,” he commented before peeking around a corner and calling out to another patrol.

“Hey guys, come give us a hoof with this box!” The two other stallions came over and the four struggled to get the box off the ground and all waddled down the hallway.

“Geeze... this thing... weighs... a ton...” one spoke out as they neared the door. Setting the box down, one stallion pulled out a set of keys for the locked door and opened it up. Rather than pick it up again, the four stallions struggled to push the box into the room then slammed the door shut and locked it once again.

“Whatta yah think was in it? Concrete?” one stallion asked but another answered more professionally.

“Probably more evidence against that murderer Burdick. Good thing we built the forensic lab when we did. Perfect timing,” he stated, a third chiming in.

“Yeah. I can't believe he actually did that... I mean... the guy was a hero not to long ago-” but the first cut him off.

“Don't let first appearances throw you off. Some ponies... things, are evil and sinister and you'd never know otherwise...”

* * *

Evan's perspective...

“Oh man... I can't believe that worked,” I said as I got out of the box with Derreck and quickly began looking around. In minutes Derreck spoke both our minds.

“This is... way too convenient to be coincidental... they have stuff here that is on par with modern tech back home... it took us nearly a century to come up with this sorta stuff and they... just outta the blue decided they wanted to make a specialized team just for this?” he mentioned, shifting through papers.

“We gotta look for those nines... the old original casings,” I stated but Derreck just shook his head.

“They won't be here,” he told me.

“Why not?” I asked and he tossed a bag with a bullet casing in it at me.

“The evidence was falsified,” he informed me and I looked at the casing, which was a .45ACP.

“How... how do you know?” I asked and he laughed.

“Look at the case? See how clean it is?” he asked and I looked close. HE WAS RIGHT! Not only was the case sparkly clean but there wasn't even a primer in it.

“Just fresh empty casings... meaning we were set up. These were never fired. They were created so they could put your fingerprints on it and frame you for the murders of all those guards... just look at these,” he said, throwing over a fine sheet of some kinda science looking transparent paper. It had fingerprints all over them.

“Your fingerprints... they've made copies... where would they get your fingerprints?” he asked and I looked to the fresh, brand new shells.

“From where they got the shells... I'm always handing around Flim and Flam's... hell, my fingerprints are all over Juggernaut! But... if Kianna gave me the gun... presumably to set me up, why didn't they fire off a few rounds with it and print my fingerprints on those fired cartridges instead?” I asked and Derreck just shrugged.

“Maybe they thought it would be enough to just have Flim and Flam testify against you and set you up for the fall... just lazy and a bunch of amateurs,” he told me.

“FREEZE!” Boomed a regal voice and both Derreck and I spun, our entire focus of view fielding itself to the voice's owner, ready for a fight. A figure stepped out from the darkness, her translucent mane and tail flowing beautifully in the darkness, her slender frame moving in a casual way.

“Ahhh... Mr. Parker... I would expect as much... why are you two not in your cell?” the regal form asked.

“Nothing pieced together... it was a scrambled puzzle that was hastily forced together and looked like shit... and the jury and judge was forced to accept it,” he stated. The figure stepped forwards and into the light and I gasped as I was bestowed by the presence of Princess Celestia.

“Ugh... Your highness...” I whispered and she smiled faintly.

“Even in these dire times... you still address me as your leader,” she stated proudly then looked to Derreck. “Indeed the trial evidence was flopped with inconsistencies... Mr. Parker, you have done your part well. Now if you would be so kind as to leave Mr. Burdick and myself in private... I have some things to go over with him.”

Derreck gave her a nod and left without so much as a word. She looked to me with a patronizing glare. “You have caused much pain Mr. Burdick,” she noted and I nodded.

“I know... I know. But I couldn't lie. I did kill those mobsters and I wouldn't lie about it... but those guards I-” she cut me short.

“You know it's strange... I've always had a hunch... a... voice in the back of my head... telling me there's morbid crime happening in Manehatten but every time I dispatch an investigation they come up with nothing. I've been there myself but as always everypony I meet is on the tips of their hooves around me...” she trailed off and looked to me. My heart was pounding. This was either going badly... or very badly... I couldn't tell just yet.

“And now I see why. Corruption within the ranks of my most prestigious force, the royal guards... rather, the investigating unit. This... forensic team... ha... I always was a little suspicious about it. They did nothing but examine and research evidence in those guard cases...” she again trailed off

“Celestia I-” she cut me short.

“And here you are... causing so much pain among everypony, yet not even the one whom killed my guards,” she commented.

“Celestia I'm-” she cut me off again.

“It wasn't just the killings. You've been causing Twilight Sparkle much grief and sorrow since before all this happened!” she scorned me. “And now of all times, when she bears your child!” she boomed at me and I flinched then registered what she had just said.

“Wait... wait what?!” I gasped. “Sh-she... she's what?” I stuttered and Celestia just scoffed.

“She's pregnant! With your child and here you are still screwing around, believing she's your mother! Can't you for once take something seriously!” she boomed and I stumbled back. I was... my mother was pregnant and I... I...

“Don't look like that!” she said in a quiet tone yet one with such power behind it that I was left dumbfounded.

“I... I don't know... the guards I can prove I didn't do but Manehatten... Flim, Flam they-” she cut me short.

“Their butt-bucking traitors to you. They sold you out and framed you for somepony paying them more!” she told me and I nearly slumped to the ground.

“You need to show the world you did the right thing, even if it was dirty... or maybe, you didn't do the right thing, and you truly do belong behind bars for the rest of your pitiful days!” she snapped at me and I stood tall.

“I did do the right thing! I... was just in the wrong place at the wrong time... those bastards Flim and Flam had me delivering that miracle food to the Liotta's, and then the Gravelli's kidnapped Derpy and... and... AND!” I began to break down.

Christ... no, this couldn't be happening. I already had one mother disown me for not being good enough... I couldn't... not again.

Tears trickled down my cheeks as my fists clenched. I couldn't... I had to...

Celestia stepped forwards, speaking in a calm and most heart touching way. “I remember when you first arrived to Equestria. You were hot headed... arrogant... foolish... but above all else you were scared. Scared of the unknown. You didn't know if you could trust this world because you were scared of it... do you remember that?” she asked and I nodded.

She closed her eyes and sighed. “And now it seems... that the tables are turned... I'm not sure if the world can trust you, because of the great unknown that lies before us,” she stated.

“Celestia... you have to trust me. I did what I had to do. I didn't have anypony to turn to! Derpy... they were going to kill her if I didn't hand over that stupid... all over some stupid vial of goo... all that over some stupid marketing thing... you have to believe me,” I said and she closed her eyes shut.

“I want to believe you Evan-” I cut her short.

“Burdy... my friends... what little I have left... they call me Burdy...” I stated.

“I want to believe you... Burdy, I really do... but death, isn't such a simple matter... and by hurting Twilight, you have hurt me...”

“Please... Celestia, you have to believe me. I didn't want this... any of this, to happen. I don't... I used to gallivant around like some kinda show off, trying to prove myself because all I wanted was to be loved... I thought I needed to prove myself... but then I realized I didn't... but it was too late, the damage had already been done yet... I had hid it with a bandage. If I could... I'd do anything to take it all back.” There was a long pause before I spoke again. “Celestia... please, how can I show you?” I asked and she sighed again, a tear coming to her eyes.

“I remember the first time we met Burdy... all those months ago... heck, it's almost been a year now... do you remember that day?” she asked and I nodded. “You thought I was like a deathly cloud looming over you, going to strike when you least expected it... and now, our roles our reversed. I'm not sure what to think of you.”

“You've just gotta trust me,” I stated and she looked up to me with those heart filled eyes of hers.

“Alright... I realize you're denser than diamonds so I'll be completely blunt with you. I'll trust you, but...” she trailed off and there was a seemingly endless and most silent pause. “Only if you... will eat out my vagina,” she stated and I stood there with a stupid look on my face.

“What?” I asked in a blank voice.

“Go down on my pussy, and pleasure me with your tongue...” she began in the most plain and casual tone. “Right here... right now and perform oral sex on me, and I will return the favor... err uhh... I mean, like... I'll return the favor, not like that but... you know?” she stated and I blinked in disbelief and confusion. She couldn't be serious.

“You can't be serious...” I stated and she walked forwards so that she was just inches from my face and I could feel her breath on my lips.

“Oh I am serious Burdy... see this?” she asked, squinting her eye slightly and raising a brow while pointing one of her forehooves at her face. “This is my serious face.”

“That's ridiculous! How will that make you trust me?!” I gasped and she whispered back in a most alluring tone yet still one of powerful demeanor.

“It will prove that you are willing push past your inhibitions and lay everything on the line. To go back to that first instance of trust and give your one hundred and ten percent, to prove who you really are. To lay everything on the table and not leave out a single detail. To show the world you're not just some bloodthirsty beast with a lust for death!” she told me.

“This is ridiculous! I can't! You said yourself Twilight-” Celestia cut me short.

“This isn't about sex or relationships! It's about trust!” she scolded me then laid on the floor with her rump faced towards me. “Okay, proceed,” she said and I just blinked.

“Pfft... this is absurd! This can't... no way,” I stated.

“HUMPH!” Celestia grunted as she stood back up. “Well, I guess you won't really do 'anything' to take it all back, will you Burdy!” she grumbled in an annoyed tone.

“Wait no! Hold on...” I trailed off and she rose a brow.

“If I... on you... you'll help me out in this whole ordeal?” I asked and she nodded.

“Of course. If you pleasure me with your tongue, I'll make sure everypony understands that you're one of the good guys... the only one you'll have to reconcile with afterwards will be Twilight, though after my speech it will be much easier to do so,” she stated.

“Ah-al-alright... ah-I'll... I'll do it,” I stated and she perked a brow again.

“You'll do what?” she asked.

“I'll perform oral sex on you,” I stated. She nodded with a faint, almost sly, smile.

“Alright then... I'll just...” she looked over her shoulders both ways. “Make sure nopony is watching... and uhh... alright it looks clear...” she trailed off and once again laid on her back, though her hindlegs were squeezed together this time.

“Alright, here we are... and...” she said before spreading her legs wide. “Go.”

This was ridiculous! I had all the evidence I needed to prove I didn't kill those guards... but Manehatten... and I had just been caught after breaking out of my cell. I guess things wouldn't be in my favor unless I...

I bit my lip and Celestia looked to me, again with that risen brow look. It looked as though she was disappointed, annoyed, and growing impatient, all at once. One of her front hooves moved to her flank, right over top her cutie mark, and gave a tug, spreading open her lower lips just enough to give me a view of her already glistening hole.

'1-2-3... do it,' my conscious said in a mocking tone.

'Shut... up,' I replied back. As if now... NOW, of all times, my mind decides to grow a filthy perception on things. I fell to my knees and Celestia put a hoof to her other flank, spreading herself even wider and in a more presenting way.

Her hole was now fully spread open, her tunnel easily visible and coated with pussy juice, some of which oozed down. I slowly, and most reluctantly, leaned forwards and towards her love hole. She wasn't necessarily what one would consider gaping, but she was much looser than Twilight, that I knew for certain just from sight.

As my thoughts shifted to my mother I stopped in hesitation. I... I shouldn't do this. It's absurd. Celestia should know this is cheating, fuck trust it's-

I was cut off as she shimmied a little closer to me and the heat from her genitalia struck me like a sledgehammer. I shouldn't... I couldn't...

I leaned in, my soft wet lips gingerly making contact with her lower, puffy white lips. Celestia however, didn't make so much as a sound. I looked up to see her looking downing to me with that damn look of hers.

My arms reached around her hindlegs and rested on her belly as I slowly extended my tongue, my eye focused on keeping in contact with her own. Very gently, and almost as though to tickle her, the tip of my tongue began to dance around her puffy lips which, as of now, were once again sealed shut, no longer giving a full view of her pink inner walls.

As my tongue began to gently touch her lips I could feel her body stiffen slightly. Not a full tense, just a slight rise in stiffness. Her facial expression however, didn't change one bit.

My tongue changed positions and began to move up and down her slit, spreading her open just slightly. I thought, almost certain, I heard a whispered moan leave her mouth, but I couldn't be certain since she barely moved but again, just got slightly tenser. But that damn look was still peering down on me.

My mouth moved up to her little nub and I gave it a gentle suckle, this time really getting a reaction. At first her face twitched severely and she let out a deep groan, one that sounded as though she was desperately trying to stifle her cries of pleasure.

“FFFssssSHHHHHGAHHHH!” Celestia hissed to herself and her hind right leg began to twitch. Her mouth sprang open as she cried out in pleasure, blushing faintly before biting her lip. I continued with my assault on her pussy, which was now oozing juices like a leaky faucet.

I kept my left arm wrapped around her waist and began to play with her teats, only making her jittering leg twitch all the more often. My mouth covered her pussy completely and I forced my tongue into her canal, finally getting a real sign of arousal out of the princess mare.

Her mouth shot open as a true moan of pleasure left her mouth, no longer content on trying to keep it bottled up inside. She squealed and whined as my tongue invaded her cunt.

She began to grind herself into my face, rubbing furiously against my tongue. I moved my tongue up to her clitoris and began to suck as my right hand moved down to her nethers. I began to rub the length of my finger up and down her slit, stopping every now and then to spread her wide open or to prod her slightly.

Her body began to stiffen, to the point at which I thought she had stopped breathing. However even so, lewd moans and squeals of sexual pleasure still continued to pour out from her mouth. I decided it was time to finish it, as she would obviously now trust me... if this was really how ponies regained trust with one another.

I sucked a little harder on her clit and shoved both my index and middle finger into her soppy wet box. I had kept eye contact with her for this whole time, but as my fingers hilted themselves to the knuckles inside of her, she let out a shrieking cry of pleasure, her thighs slamming together around my head as she wrapped her hindlegs around me, squeezing so hard I saw stars.

Her inner walls clamped down on my fingers, squeezing them tightly and feeling as though they were suckling on them, pulling them inwards. After what felt like minutes, Celestia's grip on my head eased off and she released me. I looked back to her to see if she was still giving me that damn look, only to be shocked by the expression splewed across her face.

Her mouth was gaping open, drool dripping from the side of her lip, tongue lolled out the other side. Her eyes seemed to sparkle with afterglow and a deep red hue of blush was flushed across her cheeks.

“Ohhh great Tartarus... I have not felt that pleasure in ages. I... I, ahem... uhm!” She pulled back from me, my fingers leaving her now rather tight hole, which was still twitching, with a SCHLUCK!

My hand and fingers were covered in a viscous fluid that had a thick string still attached from the tips of my fingers to her entrance. 'Did she just?...' I thought to myself.

She stood up and I went to follow but gasped at the sudden realization of heavy arousal. I had a wildly hard stiffy and was leaking precum to the point it had put a small stain in the jail outfit I was wearing.

“GUH... UGH!” I gasped as I went to step back.

“I can see you wish to have your needs satisfied as well. And all those whom bow before the goddess of the sun shall be rewarded,” she told me but I shook my head nervously. My heart rate nearly shot through the roof as I found myself backed up against a wall.

She stood to her hindlegs, placing each fore hoof on opposite sides of my head as she leaned in close. “I know what you want. Your body has made that completely obvious.” Her horn lit up and I felt a sensational feeling coat my erected phallus.

With immense willpower I ducked beneath her forelegs and slipped out from between her and the wall, waving my arms. “Nononononono!” I stammered frantically. “I'm really good. Seriously. Trust right?” I said without a single breath between words. In my haste however I tripped over my own footing and slammed into the ground, back to the floor.

Celestia was quick to find her place atop of me, magic sliding off the jail pants that were only held to my waist by a small rope. I let out a gasp as my willy sprang free and just briefly brushed her slick, gaping nethers.

I rolled our bodies over in an attempt to break free but got caught up on the jailer pants that were still wrapped around my ankles and fell atop of her body, my cock pressed up against her once again. The underside of my thick length rubbed against her slit, coating it in her love juices.

I most regretfully let out a throaty moan, wishing to goddess I could take back how good it felt. Just as my feet found grip and I went to stand, Celestia rolled our bodies once more, again taking her place atop of me.

Before I could even flinch she plunged herself down on me, impaling her tunnel with my shaft. We both let out a unisoned moan of pleasure, the action enough to bring me to the brink.

I lurched, my body moving on its own as I went to start thrusting her but her magic held me down at the hips. She slowly leaned down on me, taking my right and and sucking on my fingers in an erotic way, licking off the juices before forcing her lips upon mine, her tongue invading my mouth.

I tasted her marecum as her tongue wrestled mine into submission... not like I was fighting back for dominance. Her cum... it... it tasted like... like fruity bubblegum. With that, she slowly rose off my prick, keeping just the head inside of her warm inviting pussy.

“Now... tell me what you want,” she offered.

My response was raspy and stuttered. “I... I w-want... I gotta... get out!” I forced myself to overcome the immense pleasure she was bringing me. This wasn't about trust anymore. Maybe before one could pawn that off as earning back trust. But this? This was purely just fucking like animals. This WAS cheating, or rather it would be if I enjoyed it. Otherwise it was... molestation. Rape even.

“Hmm,” Celestia hummed to herself as she slowly began to take me again, inch by inch. I found myself looking down, seeing my thick cock disappear into her depths as the girth of my shaft spread her wide. “You seem to be having a hard time making up your mind. Let me help you cum... to the right one,” she teased, slowly starting to rock her hips against mine to a rhythm.

I was brought to the brink of orgasm several times but each time she'd slow and let my body simmer back down. It was agonizing to think I was actually enjoying this. It wasn't right.

The magic around my wrists and hips let go and against my will my body began to thrust into her, pounding her pussy with enough force that it shook her entire body. My hands, against my demand to shove her off, grabbed her hips and began to pull her down with each thrust, pushing her up every time I was pulling back.

Celestia began to moan out once more, closer to her own orgasm than even myself. 'PULLOUT DAMMIT! RUUUUUUUUUUN! GOOOOOO! GET OUTTA HERE!' I yelled at myself then realized something awful.

I was no longer in control of my body... I was the conscious. I was the voice in the back of the head. I was sitting on the sidelines while my body, as though it was someone else entirely... was rutting Princess Celestia... yet worse of all I could feel everything. Feel how tight and warm she was. Feel the building suspense of imminent orgasm... and feel how I didn't want to stop.

Her inner walls clasped down on my shaft, squeezing it snugly and pulling me in deeper. The immense increase in tightness drove me over the edge and I drove home a final thrust, blowing a powerful load of hot sticky cum into her depths, plastering her walls white with my seed.

As the glow of orgasm washed over me, everything became bright white and I found my mind lost into that bright nothingness...

* * *

I felt a beam of light gaze upon me. I twitched and clenched my eye shut in an attempt to block out the light that was seeming to pierce through even my eyelid.

I tried to roll over but found myself shackled. I gasped as I awoke, now remembering everything that was going on. I lurched up into a sitting position and looked at the shackles around my wrists and ankles.

“UGH!” I grunted out vocally as I shook my arms and rattled the chains of the shackles. But I had... last night... Derreck and I... I had... with Celestia!

My eye was wide open as I tried to puzzle things together. I had... I had performed oral sex on her and... even had intercourse with her... as a form of rebuilding trust... and then...

“Heard you and Princess Sunbutt had a good time last night,” grumbled a powerful voice. I swung my head to the side and saw Derreck sitting across from me, in similar jail garb.

“DERRECK?!” I gasped and he grunted.

“Had to bring your sorry ass back here. Figures you pleaded guilty to that Manehatten incident... now I'm getting sticked for it too-” he was cut off as a baton was clacked against our jail cell bars.

“Alright scumbag, time for your sentencing. Hope you get what's coming to you,” the jailguard grunted as he unlocked the door. He was backed by a few other guards... one of which was that bulky one, the one I was having trouble putting my finer on.

I stood up acceptingly. If Celestia was serious about helping me out, then I should have no problem with this trial. Derreck was hauled along as well, this time though Shining was not present during my transportation to the court room.

Bringing me in, all eyes fell on me. I was surprised to say the least to my mother and her friends present, though her look of deep sorrow was not one of comfort to myself. I was seated next to Derreck and Hearty as the judge trotted in and took her spot, immediately going through all the crap about yesterday and again going over how lucky I was to be gifted with trial due to all the evidence against me.

I took a brief scan of the area but couldn't spot Celestia. Where in blue blazes was she?!

“Mr. Burdick... have you anything else to say for yourself before we continue?” the judge asked and, without my mental input, I stood to my full height, body moving on its own along with my mouth.

“Your honor, jury... I was framed for these crimes!” I shouted out, much to the surprise of everypony in the room. Hearty pulled on my arm.

“Kid! Sit down, we don't have much to run on since you pleaded guilty!” he hissed.

“No,” I told him them turned to the judge. Dammit! Celestia should be here by now, but if she was a no show, then I had to do this on my own and I had all the evidence to prove that.

“You're honor, I wish for the shell casings to be brought back out from the evidence locker. I have vivid proof that the evidence has been falsified!” I said in a demanding tone. The judge rose a brow but then nodded. A handful of stallions left the room and Heartigan leaned over to me and whispered.

“I sure hope you know what you're doing kid,” he said in a quiet tone and I nodded. I knew everything and how it was going to play out. I felt... almost cocky... almost too good about all of this. As though nothing could stop me.

“Your honor... or rather, jury. As you all know, there was a forensics team put together to help with the investigation into these heinous crimes, correct?” I asked and there was a silence, queue for me to continue.

“And as you know, they've made terrific advances in technology regarding such instances as firearms data... firearms which, aside from myself and a prostitue human named Keanu, do not exist in this world,” I said aloud then thought to myself. 'Why did I call her Keanu?! Her name is Kianna...' I thought silently but words kept flowing from my mouth, no longer my own thoughts... as though another was speaking for me.

“You've got to ask yourself... how is it, this team of scientists and investigators know so much about technology that, before myself and Keanu arrived, didn't even exist in this world?” I asked and Keyes pitched up in an irritated voice.

“What's your point?” she snapped and I held up my hand for her silence.

“I'll get to that once the evidence arrives, until then...” I looked back to the jury.

“You've got to wonder to yourself... most new teams put together for investigatory purposes take a few years at best to start getting as good as this forensics team started off as. How is it they know so much about firearms that they can just... speak as though they've done this their whole lives?” I asked and Keyes pitched in.

“It isn't hard to trace it back to the only human with firearms!” she hissed and I chuckled.

“And what about the prostitute woman, Keanu?” I asked, thinking to myself once again. 'But her name isn't... besides she's a gun runner and mercenary, not a prostitute!'

Keyes was silent. Not soon after, the stallions returned, wheeling in a cart with several items of evidence on it, all sealed in bags. “Your honor, if I may,” I said, picking up one of the bags with a half dozen empty shells in it. Walking up to the jury I displayed it before them. “Jury, if you would to take a look at these shells...” I trailed off holding the bag in front off them. “You'll see there is a little hole in the bottom... a vacant space where it seems something should be fitted,” I told them. “That thing, is to be what is called a primer. You see, in firearms, more specifically the cartridges they fire, the primer that is missing in this cartridge is one of the base components. When a cartridge is fired the firing pin from the firearm strikes this primer which creates a spark. Said spark ignites the propellant powder inside the casing which creates a significant force to launch a small projectile down the barrel of the firearm, generally at super sonic speeds. The burnt propellant usually leaves a black colored soot inside the casing... these casings are not dirty, nor have primers... meaning they were never used in a firearm before being collected for evidence,” I stated and Keyes boomed in uproar.

“Objection your honor. He is speaking information on which the jury has no valid information about!” she shouted and I spoke up in retort.

“Oh really. Well... seeing as how your forensics team is so good... perhaps we can have their input on it?” I suggested then went on to continue. “On top of that your honor... my firearm of choice is a fifty caliber handgun... one which produces a powerful magnitude of kinetic energy nearly four times that of a .45ACP. The wounds in those guards would have been much more severe,” I replied confidently.

“The perfect cover!” Keyes shouted back. “Using a caliber different from your usual one to plead innocence,” she stated, started to lose her own momentum.

“And what about Keanu, the prostitute?” I asked and she quickly tried to switch to a different topic.

“It doesn't matter what you say. We had a verbal confession by you yourself, that you killed the ponies in Manehatten!” I gritted my teeth.

“That was to save a friend!” I yelled back and she scoffed.

“So you justify killing hundreds of ponies in one night by saying it was to save one friend! Hah, lies!” she scoffed before there was a scream.

“WAIT!” Called out a somewhat muffled voice. Everypony seemed to look around but couldn't find the origin of the voice. Suddenly one of the large windows were smashed open, a grey streak flying in and right at me.

I could barely brace myself, and my legs being securely shackled together didn't allow me to take a wide stance.

Derpy careened into me, smashing both our bodies into the cart of evidence and spewing the contents all over the floor as we crashed into the ground.

“Nice of you... to drop in Derpy...” I chuckled. She however, didn't have time for small talk.

I could hear Derreck mutter to himself. "Speak of the devil... and he will appear."

“He's innocent!” Derpy cried out and the judge rose a brow. Derpy first looked back to me. "I heard that you were in trouble for this. How could they do this to you? You're a hero!” she stated but was cut short as the judge interrupted.

“And whom might you be, Mrs.?” the judge asked.

“Hooves, Derpy Hooves, and it's Ms.,” she said, trotting up to shake her hoof.

The judge however, pointed to the stand and had her take oath. “Okay, Ms. Hooves... would you mind explaining your... reasoning for believing Mr. Burdick is innocent?” she asked and Derpy nodded. The evidence was still scattered all over the floor but everypony seemed more interested in Derpy's testimony.

“Well... I was in Manehatten delivering mail and met Burdy, and we're the bestest of friends. We do all kinda fun things together like play chess when he's in the hospital, and go to the beach, and-” Keyes cut her short.

“Onto the point please!”

Derpy gave a blank expression and then nodded. “Oh, right! So I was in Manehatten, and I was helping Burdy around, cause he got lost-” again, Keyes cut her short.

“Did it ever occur to you as strange that Mr. Burdick lives in Ponyville... yet he was wandering the streets of Manehatten, Ms. Hooves?” she asked but Derpy shook her head.

“Nah. I see ponies from all over exploring new places. They call it vacationing. Anyway, I was helping him along and then a really mean stallion grabbed me and threatened to kill me, and then Burdy killed him instead,” she said. I dipped my head into my hands, wishing she had left that little detail out.

“So...” Keyes began. “Rather than peacefully resolve the situation... Mr. Burdick simply killed him?” she asked and Derpy gulped then nodded.

“At first I didn't like it either, but then I realized the stallion could have killed me, for no reason! And Burdy did try to get him to let me go but he put a knife to my throat... right here!” she said, pointing to her neck. “So then, I was crying because it was scary to see a dead pony, and I went to leave, then some really mean stallions dragged me into a carriage and put a bag over my head then beat me up. They were really mean. They were talking about doing all sorts of really mean things to me, and said after they got what they wanted from Burdy, that they were just going to kill me anyways. I thought I was done for, and then Burdy came in and saved me!” she stated. The judge rose a brow then just sighed deeply with a large exhale.

“Objection your honor!” Keyes yelled out. “The only witnesses and alibis Mr. Burdick has thus far brought to the stand have been a disgruntled investigator, a talking dog and a mentally retarded pegasus!” she yelled, Derpy gasping and whining, deeply hurt by the other mare's hurtful words.

Seeing my friend hurt like that, publicly no less, drove me into a deep frenzy rage. I clenched my fists and tensed before slamming the bases of my fists into the metal table, putting a large dent in it.

“YOU TAKE THAT BACK YOU BITCH!” I boomed, standing to my full height but only being rewarded with a strike to the back of my knee from a security baton, swung by that big brutish stallion.

A second swipe slapped me across the temple, putting stars into my vision as I fell onto all fours, gasping as my world spun. I could see from my peripheral... a third strike coming down from above. I let out a deafening roar as I swung both fists into the chest of the stallion with brutal force, sending him crashing back and into the opposition's table.

I went to stand but was tackled from all sides by half a dozen royal guards. Keyes yelled out. “You see?! That man is vicious, unstable. DANGEROUS! He should be executed for all the guards he has killed!”

“THAT WAS THE PROSTITUTE, KEANU!” I yelled back and she lost her mind with irritation, finally pushed to the brink.

“HER NAME IS KIANNA! AND SHE'S A GUNRUNNER, NOT A PROSTITUTE!” She screamed back and I laughed, her expression grim and a hoof covering her mouth.

“SAY IT AGAIN! SAY IT AGAIN FOR ALL TO HEAR!” I yelled, the guards atop of me now also listening as the whole courtroom fell into silence. I chuckled audibly, eventually laughing loudly. “Say it one more time! Tell the whole room what her real name is... what she really does!” I laughed, now understanding why I was calling her Keanu, and stating she was a prostitute... somehow, I knew Keyes knew whom Kianna was... and knew all along that by addressing her as Keanu, and stating she was a prostitute, it would get Keyes to eventually slip.

The judge banged her hammer. “Investigator Keyes... if you would be so kind... as to repeat what you said just seconds ago... word for word.” The judge seemed pretty serious.

Keyes gritted her teeth and Heartigan spoke up. “You're under oath kid...” he smirked and Keyes scoffed.

“Okay fine! FINE! Her name is Kianna... and she's a firearms dealer, a gunrunner as they call them back on Mr. Burdick's world. So what?!” she snapped and I laughed again.

“So... why is it that if you knew who she was... and that she dealt firearms... the firearms which were undoubtedly used in these killings... why didn't you stop her?” I asked, the tables now turned.

“That doesn't change the fact that you killed all those ponies in Manehatten!” she screamed but a most authoritative voice overruled her.

“Yes it does! Because it was I that ordered him to Manehatten!” The whole room turned to the courtroom doors just as Celestia entered. Everypony, including myself but excluding Keyes, took a bow.

Celestia stepped forwards, and gave me a hoof, helping me to my feet. “Mr. Burdick was under my direct orders to travel to Manehatten and investigate the crime that has seemed to spread across Manehatten as of recently, like a bruise across Equestria's face. It would seem that whenever I myself go, that everypony is on the tips of their hooves, acting very uppity to impress me. I have, on numerous occasions, sent an investigation unit... generally led by yourself, isn't that right Keyes?” she asked, the investigator/detective nodded. “And it always comes up clean, as though it is on the same prestigious level as Canterlot... when I truly know deep down inside, that is not the case. I needed somepony with little to no ties to me. Somepony whom nopony would recognize... the only connection Mr. Burdick has to me... is being that he is my former student's student... the perfect candidate. When he was faced with the situation of Ms. Derpy Hooves, he acted accordingly and justly and I would expect no less. The mob families in Manehatten have, as I have recently received information of, always had a very cruel nature and Ms. Hooves's life was in great danger. But... I suppose we would know all about that, if my investigation unit wasn't let by a mobster cell agent, isn't that right... Ms. Keyes... Gravelli?” Celestia asked, turning to Keyes who only went pale in the face.

“After Mr. Burdick took down your father, Dominic Gravelli, you made it a personal vendetta to take him out... it took me some time to figure it out, but now it is as clear as my day's sky,” she stated and Keyes took a few steps back, backing into that big bulky stallion whom stood behind her. "I always wondered what your full name was, Ms. Gravelli."

Heartigan stood up and chuckled, addressing Keyes. “Hey kid... looks like you lose... and I win... again,” he stated, his voice crispy just like that of Danny Glover. Why was he so smug about this all of a sudden?

Celestia stepped to my right, Danny on my left and Derreck sitting silent, a confident smirk on his face. “Guard,” Celestia spoke in her royal voice. “Arrest Ms. Keyes Gravelli,” she ordered but Keyes snapped out in anger.

“FUCK THIS!” she screamed, standing to her hindlegs and flicking her right wrist. A small compact submachine gun slid out on a wrist gauntlet, the gauntlet having been hidden beneath her suit this whole time. It was customized to be operated by a hoof. Her left hoof slapped a stick magazine into the gun then racked back on the open bolt. Turning her aim to us, she first sprayed Heartigan with a blast from the Mac-10.

The stallion's fine garments were torn to shreds as blood splattered from his wounds and he was kicked back. She then turned her aim to Celestia. “NO, TIA!” I yelled out valiantly, jumping in front of the princess in an act of heroism as the mare blasted at the princess with her subgun.

I felt at least a half dozen heavy .45ACP slugs tear into my chest, perforating my lungs and at least one striking my heart. I gasped, a splew of blood coming from my mouth as I crashed to the ground and lay motionless yet was still able to see and hear everything around me.

Ponies screamed and scurried about as the mare went for a third burst but found the gun had stovepiped a round and was jammed. “Oh fuck it! LUG!” She yelled, the big stallion discarding his heavy guard armor, and that was the moment.

I remembered him. One of Kianna's mercenary goons. One of the heavy troopers. The one whom operated the machineguns. Two M60E1s rolled out of a battle harness strapped to his entire body. I heard Derreck boom out a mighty roar just as the M60s lit up the room. I could do nothing but clench my eyes shut and pray I didn't have to witness this horror.

There was a silence and I managed to crack open my eye, only to see a true spectacle. Derreck's arms were held out, coated in a dark blue aura, and in front of him were at least a hundred bullets suspended in the air, stationary. The jaw of the machinegun stallion slacked open in shock as Derreck's arms fell back to his sides, the aura dissipating and the shells all clinking to the ground.

“LUG, LET'S GET OUTTA HERE!” Keyes screamed, the two darting for the exit. Several ponies scrambled over to the princess, to check if she was okay.

“AWAY FROM ME YOU FOOLS. BURDY IS THE ONE WHOM WAS HURT, TRYING TO SAVE ME NO LESS!” She boomed out but they didn't get much a chance to check my fatal injuries as Derreck rushed over, grabbing my right forearm and yanking me to my feet.

I coughed up another slew of blood but my wounds were sealing shut already. He clenched his fist and with it, three razor sharp blades erected from between his knuckles, all coated in a flaming dark blue aura similar to the one that was around his arms. His metallic blades slashed at the chains holding my shackles together, cutting them as though they were mere butter.

“THIS WAY!” He ordered me, pulling me along and only stopping briefly to pick up a loaded magazine and the HK MK23 from the evidence spewed across the ground. We ran outside to where Keyes and that bulky stallion Lug were already flying away in a carriage being pulled by two pegasus.

Derreck grunted, the pistol falling from his grip. “What now?!” I gasped and he took a wide stance, arms shooting out in front of him and cupping his palms together.

“KA...” He grunted, body flexing. “MEH!” he yelled and my eyes went wide. Oh no... no-no. Celestia had said this wasn't allowed. “HA-MEH!” His arms swung to the side as his muscles expanded to the point were most of his clothes shredded apart... not that these jail clothes were a good fit to begin with.

I felt the ground shake as a sphere of blue energy formed in his hands, bright beams of light shooting of from it. I could see little blue particles drawing in from all over, even some coming from myself. “HAAAAAAAA!” Derreck roared out, stepping forwards with his right foot and swinging his arms out in front, blasting a devastating beam from his palms that shot towards the carriage with ferocious might.

The blast struck part of the carriage and the pegasus pulling it, blowing it apart and the remaining bits falling to the ground in a smoldering wreck. Derreck gasped and panted slightly. “Man... that really takes it outta a guy... come on!” He scooped up the HK pistol and hurried along to the burning wreckage.

“You think they survived?” I asked as he began kicking over parts of the wreckage, first finding the big stallion, impaled by some wood and dead as dead could be.

“Not him,” he quipped in an Arnie voice. No sooner had he said that, we heard some movement, the wreckage moving slightly. We looked over to where Keyes was lying, bloodied but not fatally injured, unless it was internal which could very well be a possibilty.

She shakily rose her subgun, trying to bring us into her sights but Derreck just laughed and kicked the gun from the grip of her gauntlet, making the mare gasp painfully before she began to laugh.

“You know... when Kianna first arrived... she killed wildly... like she thought she was dead... no reasoning behind it... just random and sporadic... eventually I caught her... but we agreed to start a revolution... start planning her killings... at first... all we needed to do was kill the princesses... but after you killed my father... I coaxed her into believing... you needed to be removed as well... she had... met you previously... lucky coincidence... she already thought you were special forces... didn't take much to... to make her think... we hired you to... to take her out... I thought for sure my plan... would succeed... and my vengeance would be... would be... complete... but here you are...” Her breathing was painful, probably more than just a few broken ribs.

Derreck cocked the handgun and leveled it on her head but she just laughed in retort. “You can't kill me!” she laughed and Derreck rose a curious brow. “You'll have to take me in... then they'll say I'm insane... that I need clinical help... then, with the help of my allies... I'll break free... and pursue my revenge against you... and your family!” She spat blood at my feet then continued her rant. “We're demons... you... Kianna... myself... we don't belong in this world. But being as you're trying to settle down into this one... you have to abide by the law... because unlike your world, this one is civilized!” she laughed.

Derreck's facial expression twisted into a deep hatred look as he spoke in a deep tone. “But I'm not. And now I'm gonna take you out... sucka!” Keyes's eyes went wide as Derreck squeezed the trigger, blowing a gaping hole straight through the mare's head.

“Derreck! Why'd you?!...” I trailed off and my big friend just shrugged.

“Like I told her... we'll leave this mess for Celestia's guards to clean up. We've done our part. Come on, let's get our pardon,” he said, both of us turning to return to the courtroom but finding that a stallion dressed in a light khaki colored trench coat and fedora had been watching us.

"Nice job Mr. B. Nice job." I blinked in confusion.

"Who... who are you?!" I gasped and he just shrugged.

"The name's Guiseppe... but that's not important... I just thought... since Heartigan is dead and his cover is no longer relevant, that you should know the Liotta family was here for you during this whole ordeal," he stated and I blinked my eye. "You see, Heartigan is... was, our mole in Celestia's detective unit, much like how Keyes was the Gravelli family's mole. Those two were always at each other's neck, but couldn't kill one another cause it would blow their cover. I swear, I lost count how many times Heartigan humiliated Keyes, but I guess a mare can only take so much. Well... I best be splittin' like a banana." With that the mystery stallion took off into the alleyways and was gone.

I just shrugged and Derreck and I returned to the courtroom where a large crown had gathered, several photos being flashed of me as I returned with my big friend. Celestia stepped forwards and I went to bow to her but she stopped me, instead taking a bow before me.

“Mr. Burdick... or shall I call you, Burdy... I shall see to it you are pardoned off all these crimes that have been wrongfully pitted against you,” she stated and Derreck laughed.

“Because you trust him?” he joked and she blushed terribly. I looked around and spotted my mom with her friends, Twilight still crying. I rushed over but instead of getting a loving embrace I was treated to a sharp slap across the cheek by my own mother.

“UGHAH!” I gasped and Twilight tried to speak between sobs of deep sorrow.

“Evan... Why?! Just... I can't... you're murderer... I just...” she ran off, crying all the while. I gulped deeply and Applejack was the next to scorn me, looking me deep in the eye.

“Yah said yah swore yah never killed nopony!” she snapped and I flinched.

“I said I never killed any guards! Those were the allegations against me. I had no idea they'd bring up Mane-” Applejack cut me short with a scoff.

“Yer unbelievable!” With that she too left, Pinkie, Rarity and Fluttershy having already rushed off after Twilight. I looked to Rainbow Dash.

“Dash I-” but she too cut me short.

“Just... Evan this is really messed up. Yeah... I mean... you were saving Derpy but... just stay away from Ponyville, and stay away from Scootaloo,” she told me and I gasped but she was quick to pick up again. “I'm not saying you'll never be allowed back but... in this world we can't really easily justify killing... that many ponies... Evan, we just-don't-kill in this world. And I don't want your influence on Scootaloo-” I cut her short.

“But Dash!” I gasped, this time she cut me off.

“I'm not saying what you did was bad. Evan, I'm just saying... everypony has to settle and come to terms with everything that has happened. The hardest will be Twilight, but I think I can show the others what you did wasn't bad,” she told me and my eye went wide. “Hey... I'm the element of loyalty. You've saved my flank before... maybe now I can save yours... just, don't come back to Ponyville for a while,” she told me.

“Dash...” I gasped and she put a hoof to my mouth.

“I can't say what you did was bad. Heck, it was me who told you to kill Tristan after what he did... for me to shun you would be hypocritical. Just trust me when I say we'll need time to fix this, okay?” she said before also leaving.

I gasped. In this short time... my world... everything... had been shattered... maybe Keyes truly had gotten her revenge. I fell to my knees, tears flowing from my eyes, even my damaged one. “UGH... GAH...” I began to gasp, trying to hold back my sobs of despair.

Derreck rested a hand on my shoulder. “It'll be alright,” he assured me but I shook my head.

“No... she... mom... mommy!” I cried out, trying to hold onto the love she gave me as a mother, but felt it slipping from me. “Please... no...” I cried. I had nothing... not a damn thing. 'Not even a place to call home,' I whined in my thoughts, but as though he had heard my thoughts, Derreck spoke up.

“We do have one place to call home. Remember our one favor we asked of Mr. Leone of the Liotta family?” he asked and I turned to him, my world seeming to spin out of control as I felt faint in the heart. He reached down to me. "Evan... you are my brother. And brother's always have each other's back. Are always there for one another to help them when they fall. I will always be there for you when you fall. I will always pick you back up!" I took his hand...

* * *

Third person...

The old man wept to himself while still on his knees, crying about his lost mother. Suddenly something snapped, as though a switch had been flicked. He stood up to his full height, letting out a pained and most anguished yell.

His whole body tensed, his muscles bulking and flexing while his shoulders widened out. He let out another painful roar, his sharp canines lengthening significantly. His chest broadened out while his muscles once again reached maximum potential like they had when he used to work out.

A deep hellish red flash blazed straight down the right side of his face, leaving the mark of a scar down his face that started at the top right of his forehead and traveled down, over his right eyebrow then started again at his the top of his cheek and continued down, stopping at his chin. Another blaze slashed down his face, starting at the top left of his forehead and going down his face on a diagonal slant, slicing across the bridge of his nose, along with his right cheek, crossing over the other scar and creating an X mark with the other scar then travelling around the side of his neck and ending on the back of his shoulder. A final most painful flash burned across his left cheek, putting a deep cavity of a scar perfectly horizontal across his cheek.

The big man's hair shaded from grey back to his original light brown, his signs of aging now leaving as he began to look more like a man in his forties again. Standing to his hindlegs, a lot of the ponies in the nearby crowds looked to the man as he whistled, Juggernaut swerving through the crowds and coming to a stop near him. He whistled again then called out a name. “Lassie! Come along, we're going home!” he ordered, the dog first biting her lip then deciding to go along with him for now...

Author's Note

Yes I know, I take forever with these updates, and I know it's unfair to you as the readers. I bought MGS V PP, played it for a bit, then had the struggle of trying to finance a new pickup... well a newer pickup. 2010 Dodge 1500 HEMI SLT. Don't worry, I didn't get rid of Cadance, I'm just finally getting around to restoring her like I should have done years ago... besides, who would want to get rid of a truck that can make you look this badass... or maybe it's the cigar... or the duster coat and hat... or the lighting... or the shotgun... or a combination of those...

Chapter 71

'Coming to terms...'

Third person...

“Hey! Nothing went bad that whole week, alright!” Dash shot back at Applejack, whom just scoffed.

“Yah shoulda let me er one a the other gals watch over her and yah know that!” AJ snapped.

“What's the difference? He isn't a bad guy and the only reason you hate me saying that is cause you KNOW I'm right and you'd have to admit that you were wrong!” Dash nearly snarled back, Applejack growling under her breath.

“Ah can't believe you Dash! Element a loyalty an' yer siding with that... that murderer!” the southern farmpony grumbled, Dash rolling her eyes.

“There is no sides here AJ, just truth and your stubbornness at admitting he's not really bad!” Dash stomped her hoof, a timid and most soft voice picking up.

“I saw him feeding a hungry deer yesterday,” Fluttershy said with a faint smile, Applejack looking to her with a rather displeased stare, Fluttershy nearly shriveling up on the floor. “Oh... sorry for interrupting...”

“AJ, just face it and admit you were wrong! Evan... or Derreck, WHOEVER he is... isn't a bad guy. Not even close.” Dash stood tall before he friend, neither one willing to back down.

“You set all that up on purpose! Him watchin' Scootaloo!” Applejack got closer to Dash, enough so that the two could nearly feel the other's hot breath.

“Of course I did! That way you couldn't deny he isn't some murdering sociopath that you've made him out to be until now!” Dash snapped back before another voice finally cut in to stop their argument.

“EEEEEENOUGH!” Twilight screamed out, everypony turning to her. “I've let it go! Why can't you?!” Twilight yelled out, her stress obvious in the tone of her voice. “Dash... I used to love him, yes... but he's not the pony... the person, I thought he was. Please just... stop trying to make me fall in love with him again. It was always a rocky relationship and I see that now,” Twilight said, Dash going silent as AJ nudged her.

“See,” the farmer pony began, but only just before Twilight intervened.

“And AJ... he... he isn't a truly bad person at heart. He does love, he does cherish... he just...” she trailed off and thought back to the court trial. “He just isn't a good person either. Now can we all PLEASE, just drop this subject?! I've let this go a long time ago but you all seem to just keep bringing it up!”

She looked to her friends and addressed Dash first. “Dash, you were here just to get the new issue of Daring Do. Applejack, you just came for the latest book of Equestria's greatest apple recipes... and yet the first thing you two do is start arguing about Evan. We're the best of friends yet this has driven us so far apart and I can't bear to see it get any worse,” she stated, the two in statement looking to each other.

“Ah... ah guess Twi's right... ah was kinda out a line,” she admitted, Dash biting her lip.

“Y-yeah... me too. I-I... I guess I'm just being strong headed...” AJ rose her hoof to Dash's and the duo shook hooves, Twilight sighing.

“Ahem... now then. Fluttershy, I think I was about to get you that new recipe book you ordered?” she asked, Fluttershy nodding quickly.

“Oh, yes please. Angel Bunny has waited most patiently for this new style of carrot cake and I shouldn't keep him waiting any longer,” she mentioned, Twilight nodding and going through a few things before levitating over the new hard cover recipe book.

“Okay... I think that's everything,” Twilight noted before some giggling laughter entered the library. Looking over the shoulders of the others, Twilight's eyes went slightly wider as she saw the owners of the laughter.

“Pinkie?... Lassie!?” she gasped, shocked at the former's presence at the library. The canine looked at her with a rather bemused look.

“Uhh... yeah? Who else would it be?” she asked back.

“B-but... but... you and Pinkie hang out together?” the alicorn asked in disbelief, both the pink mare and the dog shooting her a rather curious look. Pinkie spoke first.

“Of course silly! We always hang out together! Lassie plays some of the best pranks. Ponies are always freaked out by a talking dog!” Pinkie giggled, Lassie chuckling to herself.

“Yeah, well I wasn't the one who changed the time of every single clock in Sugarcube Corner,” Lassie laughed, Pinkie nearly squealing as she remembered Mr. and Mrs. Cake scrambling around in confusion.

Pinkie laughed as she thought of another. “Or how you drained the water in the public pool, then dressed as a giant fish and began flopping around?” The last part had Twilight snicker as she imagined the scene.

The alicorn stepped up to the duo with a bright smile, the talk of pranks brightening her day. “Well, I never knew you two were such good friends,” she mentioned, Lassie looking to her with a cock eyed look.

“Why not?” she asked seriously, Twilight shrugging.

“Well... just with everything-” Lassie cut her short.

“Hey... you and Evan don't get along. That doesn't mean I'm going to exile myself away from your friends. The tension is between you and him, not your friends and his. Just remember that... oh yeah, here we borrowed this earlier when you were at the spa with Rarity,” Lassie said as she handed over a book labeled 'Best 100 pranks'.

Twilight levitated the book away and turned back to the pranksters. “It's not that I think you shouldn't be friends, far from it. I'm just... surprised is all.” Lassie rolled her eyes.

“Listen... like I said. I'm not gonna separate myself from my friends just because you and Evan can't get over your differences and make up,” Lassie said in a serious tone. Twilight was quick with her response.

“We're not going to make up. He isn't the man I thought he was and there's nothing for us to talk about,” she stated, stomping down her hoof. Her tone and latter action simply made Lassie laugh it off like a joke.

“Nothing to talk about, huh?” she asked, Twilight nodded. “Not a certain... pregnancy?” she inquired.

“I won't let him father a foal. Not with the kind of man he is,” she said, Lassie scoffing.

“The kind of man he is?" she asked, Twilight nodding firmly. "Okay then... Ms. Know-it-all. Tell me. What kind of man is he?” she asked, Twilight going silent for a good long moment as her stomach seemed to sink, heart skipping a beat. “Well?” Lassie asked seriously, the others all staying quiet as the canine nearly interrogated the alicorn princess.

Before Twilight could speak, Lassie spoke her own mind. “No... no, you know what? I'll tell you. Your whole relationship was a big lie." Twilight's ears perked at the last statement. "He was so tormented in his youth that he truly believed you were his mother, and why? Because you showed him decency and compassion... because you gave him something he strived for... parental nurturing. You were supposed to teach him, that was your task from Celestia. But to him, it was more like mothering... I see that now... what was so vague and blurred to you is all too clear to me and... I'm so, so very sorry for what I did,” she apologized.

Twilight was struck in near distraught from hearing those words. “What do you mean? Sorry for what?” she asked, Lassie dipping her head.

“For everything.” She looked up to the mare. “I forced you into a relationship neither one of you were ready for. And because of that it was bound to fail from the beginning. Built on a cracked foundation formed from a lie... a lie... which I told you. That if you didn't take him, I would, yet I had no intention of doing that...” she looked to the others, namely to Rainbow Dash and Applejack.

Lassie sighed as her head dipped while she spoke. “And I'm sorry for trying to intervene in this mess that I've so unintentionally created. This problem... this stake that's been driven between the two of you... it's not supposed to be fixed by your friends... friends don't fix the problem. They're just supposed to stand by your side and hold you high spirits, like friends are supposed to do. No... no..." Lassie trailed off with a faint smile. "This problem is supposed to be fixed by the two of you,” she stated. Twilight was struck in an emotional state as the others all thought back on their own actions towards the matter.

Lassie just sighed to herself as she spoke. “The fact that a talking dog had to point this out, and that nobody else realized this first... it should really make you reconsider...” Lassie noted before slowly walking out the door. Stopping just before she left, she turned and looked back through the doorway. “There's a reason he has a split personality. A reason he called you his mother... there's a reason for everything he has done or is going to do. All it takes is a simple, thorough, straight forward question... not some indirect hint. If you want to make amends with him... just know he doesn't hate you, or anypony here... and he's easy to find too. He mostly stays at his home in the Everfree. You can't miss it.” And with that Lassie left the premises of the library, leaving everypony in utter silence. The silence however, didn't last long as Pinkie bounced away in a joyful hop.

“OH WAIT! LASSIE!” she screamed out joyously. “Are we still going to put all of Mayor Mare's office supplies into helium balloons then let them float around inside Town Hall?” she asked, the duo snickering as they thought out their devious plot.

Twilight walked over to the doorway in thought. She wondered to herself, her mind wandering more than it had in months. She wasn't sure her feelings for the man. Had it actually been love, or just lust she had felt?... Could she love the man, knowing he had killed so many? Were his actions justifiable or just another one of his moments where he lost his temper?

So many things she wanted to ask, but with nopony to ask... 'Should I talk to him?' she asked herself quietly...

* * *

Derreck's perspective...

I leaned back, relaxed as ever, as I fished out Evan's 'Arnie' cigar from my duster coat pocket. “Ahh yeah... this is the life...” I mouthed the cigar around on my lips, savoring the stingy feel it brought to my lips.

Stroking my left hand down my rugged facial features, I slipped off the eye patch, blinking a few times as I struggled with the blurred focus it brought about. Snickering to myself, I recalled the events of that most faithful day.

Discord betraying us and the subsequent loss of my left eye, along with Evan's. “Ha... man, those were the days...” I muttered to myself as I recalled our glory days together. All the action, over the top fights, absurd violence... the life we so strived for...

I let out a long sigh as I reached for my glass of cider, the special brew that Big Mac himself made and let age for some time. I picked up the glass, swishing it around in the glass before taking a hefty sip.

Immediately the taste hit my tongue but...

“PWEUGH!” I spat the liquid out and tossed the glass across the room. It tasted horrid... metallic... “Ugh...” I wiped my lip before coming to the realization that it wasn't cider in my glass...

Looking to the glossy blood on my hand, I looked forwards the drink I tossed... which wasn't a drink at all. “Blood?” I asked in confusion. Last I checked, I had poured myself some cider, not...

There was a rather loud taping sound, as though somepony was walking with a cane. TICK-TICK-TICK... Turning to the sound, I spotted a cloaked pony slowly hobbling forwards, large scythe in tow which was the result of the taping noise.

“Son of a bitch...” I cursed, a low ghostly groan coming from the pony as it raised its head slightly, a bony muzzle protruding from the dark depths of the cloaked hood.

“Mr. Burdick... your time has come at last,” it hissed through a toothy smile.

“Fuck off bone bag, he ain't here. And like shit I ain't dying from some wretched, over-sized dog treat,” I replied sternly. An eerie fog surrounded Death as he stepped forwards, the clacking of his bone hooves slightly drowned out by the now softer taping 'Tick-tick-tick' of his scythe, Death using it like a cane.

Death stood a good few yards away, his presence enough to get my heart thumping a few beats faster than normal but nothing overly terrifying. “You cannot escape death,” he whispered so softly I barely caught it.

“Pfft... if I had a penny for every goddess damned time you shit birds told me that...” I trailed off and Death rose to his hindlegs, pulling back on his hood and revealing his mortifying face. “Goddess alive... I take it you don't get many follow-up dates huh?” I joked, Death charging forwards wildly with its scythe.

As Death swung, my left hand shot out and caught the blade between in index finger and thumb, stopping the otherwise fatal blow rather harmlessly. Death let out a struggling grunt of disbelief. “Hmm... I'll take that as a... no,” I taunted casually before giving Death a boot to the chest, staggering him back but keeping a firm grip on his iconic weapon.

Taking a brief once over of his weapon, I laughed to myself before snapping it in half over my knee. “So uncivilized...” I mentioned before the hilt my own weapon materialized into my palm, the rest forming together afterwards in a magical display. “Let me show you the real definition of fear,” I said in a cold tone that was nearly a hiss.

The dark blue blade gleamed with a fume of glowing and most magical mist coming off it. The weapon seemed to hum in my grip as I took a defensive stance. Death stood on all fours and took a few cautious steps back. “What's wrong Bones? You seemed so sure of yourself a few seconds ago... ohhh yeah, that's right. You came to pick on my friend Evan. What's the matter? Affraid of someone who'll fight back?” I snarked.

Just before I went to attack my senses went berserk and I ducked, quickly rolling to the side. I heard the swishing sound of blades cutting through the air but didn't get a good look until after I finished my roll and returned to my defensive stance.

Before me stood that clown of an idiot I killed on my adventure with Echo Jewel. “Woah... did you just see that guy?!” The Face of Death asked to the real Death. “I totally had the drop on him and he was just like 'Whoosh!' right out of the way. Dude, that's some pretty badass Jedi foresight shit you got,” he complimented... I think...

“Yeah I got you thinking now, don't I?” he asked as he lurched forwards, swinging about a twin set of katana swords with precise accuracy. My own blade moved with lightning speed, keeping up to his continuous assault. My defensive strategy quickly fell back and relied on quick and subtle defensive blocks. As the old saying went 'The shortest distance between two points is a straight line'. My defensive fencing technique was quick, elegant, focused and precise.

Sparks ignited off our swords as we clashed weapons furiously, The Face of Death taking to a heavy offensive stance while I myself took a solely defensive one. My style partook in minimal effort opposed to his heavy blows as I attempted to outwit him in a battle of stamina. “You must be thinking to yourself 'Wow, this is so crazy!' right? I mean, yeah I know dude, you totally blew my head off with that awesome handcannon of yours which negated my dark magic immortality but hot damn, I'm back and now were sword fighting!...” he began to blabber on carelessly as he continued a near impeccable offensive assault with his twin katanas. As we continued to fight, he continued to jabber on and it dawned upon me that this guy wouldn't get tired...

Following through with my thorough defense, I watched his move set, trying to find his weak spot. “Nuh-uh man. No generic enemy fighting style for you!” he laughed and cackled, leaping into the air in a performance of several dazzling flips before landing behind me. I swung my sword blade behind my back, blocking a crosscut from behind before myself twirling around.

“See, I'm not your average generic enemy that you can find a weak spot to exploit. Nope! I'm the final boss that kills you and ends this story with a 'BAD-END',” he laughed, changing up his attack style.

My defense stood strong but I started to become irritated with his constant jabbering. Sparks continued to clash off our blades as they connected. “Get this... drop a beat!” The Face of Death said as he jumped back suddenly and began to dance as though he was in a nightclub. “You're going bananas, while I'm wielding katanas... ooh,” he began to twirl around and slice his swords around in the air.

My patience began to thin out as he mocked me by not only foolishly dancing around like I wasn't a serious threat, but singing about it too! “I'm gonna cut you up and vanish! Your soul? It's gonna be banished! Just like Luna Moon in her bed-time pajamas!-” I cut him off with a mighty roar, The Shadow Blade fuming a large plume of dark blue mist. My damaged eye no longer distorted my vision as everything became ever clear like a sunny day.

The Face of Death looked at me with a frown. “Hey dude, don't interrupt my- WOAH!” He jumped back as I began a furious and most savage assault with my single blade. The Shadow Blade was a mere blur of motion, leaving streaks of blue in the air where I swung. My attacks were heavy handed, consisting of large swooping arcs that were nonetheless quick and devastating.

My irritating opponent began to jabber again, trying to start up a rhyme. I gave an overhead swing with immense force, to which he tried to block. My blade struck his and there was a bright dazzling flash of sparks as his blade shattered apart under the force of my blow.

The Face of Death leapt back and looked to the remainder of his sword. “Holy shi-” he was cut off as he was unreadily thrust back into the heat of battle as I continued my relentless offensive drive. “Hey wait dude, not cool you just... HEY!” he screamed as we clashed our swords together.

He staggered to keep up but things quickly tipped in my favor. My strikes were ferocious and unpredictable and brutally powerful. So much so that he only had fractions of a second to react. With the short response time I left him, his blade was constantly knocked around as he tried to block my blows, while he himself was put into great unbalance, constantly on the back of his hooves. Our blades locked together and we both pressed forward, himself attempting to overpower me, myself attempting a different maneuver...

As I felt the mustered strength of his push start to outweigh his center of balance I took a quick step back and let him lurch forwards. My blade slid down his and in an instant of a moment I slashed past his cross guard and clipped his foreleg, cutting him rather deep.

He let out a gasp of pain as I sidestepped him and let his body stagger past, his body thrown off balance from all the forward power of his push. With a twirl of my wrist, I slashed low and clipped the Achilles tendon of his hindleg.

The Face of Death tumbled to the ground as I stood tall while sheathing my sword at my side. My opponent looked to me with a grimace. “Son of a... hot damn you're good but... ahh...” he grumbled as he staggered to his hooves, limping a bit. “In a second I'm gonna heal and-”

I shot my left palm forwards, fingers extended, and hurtled him back with an invisible force. His body was slammed into a hard surface with such relentless force that he yelped in agonizing pain.

My right foot stepped back as I took a slightly crouched stance. My hands cupped to my sides as I dug deep for power. “Ka-meh...” The Face of Death stood up.

“I have to say... that was pretty impressive,” he laughed as he wiped off his lip.

“Ha-meh!” He looked to me with a cock-eyed look, a glowing fume of energy forming in the palms of my hands.

“Hey... what's that you're doi-” he was cut off as I finished the technique, stomping my right foot forwards while swinging my arms to full extension in front of me, palms facing him.

“HAAAA!” the ground shook beneath me as the energy blast hurtled towards him, my enemy squeaking in fear as he ducked down.

The large beam of energy arched upwards and struck the hard surfaced wall behind him him, the powerful eruption shaking the ground beneath us even more. I stood in my pose, smoke emulating from my hands and shoulders, a small crater formed around me.

The Face of Death looked around and then solely to me. “Nah-nah-nah-nah-NAH! Missed me, missed me, now you gotta kiss...” he trailed off as a few pebbles of debris cluttered down around him. Looking up he watched as the solid wall behind him crumbled apart and came crashing downwards on him. “Me?!” he squeaked as he was crushed by several tons of rubble.

I let out a deep inhale as I stood to my full height. A light clapping caught my attention. A dark cloaked figure began trotting forwards, a red glowing amulet around his neck. “Good... most impressive... I must say Burdy, you've become more powerful than I could have ever imagined you to be... however, it still pales in comparison,” the figure stated as he stepped forwards.

I once again brandished The Shadow Blade, taking my defensive posture. The figure laughed maniacally before brushing back his hood. “That... 'relic' will do you no good,” he laughed, taunting my weapon of choice. I gritted my teeth as I faced the scum of a stallion whom got away.

“Tristan...” I snarled through clenched teeth.

The amulet around his neck began to glow ominously before his horn matched the color of the amulet and blasted out a torrent of lightning. I arched my sword sideways, horizontally in front of my body and blocked the attack.

The red lightning struck my blade and began to absorb into it. However, even so, the force of his lightning was immense, so much so that it took nearly every drop of strength to hold my defense.

I began to roar out in effort as he continued his relentless assault but finally came to a stop, a few last trickles of electricity spurting out of his horn. As the attack finished, I twirled my sword eloquently. “Indeed... perhaps I underestimated, if only slightly, the effectiveness of that outdated weapon... irregardless, it will do you no good.” Tristan slid out of his cloak, the amulet around his neck still glowing.

I held the tip of my sword towards him, presenting myself as a dangerous threat. Tristan looked to me with an arched brow. “It would seem that... in your time here, you have made many enemies,” he commented. Death, the real one, came to his side.

“A dirty sack of bones isn't going to help you!” I quipped, Tristan laughing.

“Perhaps not, but...” he trailed off as a pair of fuming purple eyes emerged from the darkness, stepping forwards as the rest of his body came into view. “He isn't the only enemy you've made...”

Sombra stood silently at Tristan's side, along with Death. “You can't keep running from your fate forever...” Tristan laughed as yet another figure took to his side. This one was a mare, crystal blue and surrounded by an icy mist... Freeze? But she was dead...

“Hey! Hey guys... GUYS! Somepony want to lend me a hoof?” cried out a voice, a lone hoof waving from beneath the buried rubble. The Face of Death's dismembered foreleg slithered over and grabbed his exposed hoof.

The still intact hoof swatted away the dismembered hoof as he swore. “Not you! Idiot! GUYS, SERIOUSLY! THIS HURTS!” he screamed out. I looked to my opposition. The odds were stacked heavily against me...

“Son of a bitch...” I muttered as I wavered my sword to and fro, waiting for one of them to make a move.

“You see Burdy... you're heavily outmatched. You've made so many enemies that you've sealed your own fate!” Tristan laughed. Sombra took a daring charge with a gruesome looking sword, to which I immediately blocked and went to counter strike but was blasted by Tristan with an immense cluster of lightning.

The bolts of electricity sent me hurtling through the air, my metallic skeleton clearly visible as he hosed me with his new found power. Coming to a skidding stop on the ground, I cross blocked Tristan's lightning attack but was in turn rewarded by a cold icy blast to the side that numbed my arm and I was again fried by the assault of lightning Tristan kept pouring out.

My body tumbled across the floor and I came to a skidding stop, body smoking and smoldering profusely. “When we're done with you...” Tristan began, Death finishing the statement.

“You'll be begging for me to take you,” he laughed as Sombra rose his sword to deliver a fatal blow. No sooner had he, than a mystic blast struck him dead center in the chest, splintering his armor and sending him hurtling back.

Tristan and his group watched as Sombra was tossed aside before quickly looking back to the one whom had struck him. Nightmare took a stance before me, placing herself between me and my aggressor's group.

“Fool!” Freeze scowled as her horn began to glow. An erupting gunshot went off and blew apart Freeze's head, killing her off and putting me into shock. Discord stepped forwards with a smoking shotgun, racking the slide.

"Just not your kind of evil," Discord quipped as he too stood before me in a defensive way. I looked to the dead body of Freeze.

“Celestia... you killed her!” I gasped, Discord looking to me as though I was loony.

“I've done it before...” he muttered calmly. That was true I suppose. It just seemed a little...

I stood up as Death started to back pedal and Tristan took a cautious step back. “GUESS WHO?!” cackled a voice, all of us turning as a thunderous twin eruption of gunshots went off.

Tristan was taken off his hooves and tossed back, Lassie standing with a sawed-off double barrel shotgun... the same one I had used in my duel with the blue stallion. An enlightening tune began to softly echo around us as I stood with my friends. Tristan lay groaning on the ground, his chest pelted with rock salt.

I looked to Death with a stern glare. “Beat it,” I snarled, the bone bag taking another step back.

“This isn't over,” he warned before vanishing into a poof of smoke. It was then I came to a probable realization. This was just a nightmare... or it had been, until my friends arrived.

I walked over to Tristan who lay on the ground, squirming in pain. As I stood at his side, he looked to me and spat a spew of blood at my feet. “Fff...ffff....fuck you!” he swore in agony.

“I may have a lot of enemies but... I've also made a lot of friends, and they will always stand by my side,” I told him. However, just before I could finish him off his horn flashed a brilliant zeal of colors and my world began to fade out as a banging thumped the ground beneath us. Bastard had duped me... again! I felt as though I was sucked away into an abyss, my world turning into a blur...

* * *

I awoke with a tangy taste in my mouth, the kind I got from having an afternoon nap... it kinda tasted like I just drank out of a toilet. “YELCH!” I groaned as the banging continued in the real world.

Shaking off my daze I realized that it was somepony knocking on my door. “Yeah... yeah I know... I know,” I muttered quietly, still a little groggy. The knocking continuing. “Alfred...”

More knocking.

“Alfred?!” I called out a little louder but the knocking continued as my butler failed to answer the door. “I'm coming... I'm coming... don't get your panties in a wad...” I grumbled as I stood up, the book on my lap falling to the floor.

I looked down to it. The book was the one Dash had given me. 'The Art of Peace'. It was a good read, really, it was. I retrieved the book and set it atop the living room coffee table before heading towards the front door as the knocking still persisted.

“Relax... you're gonna knock the damn door down...” I commented before finally reaching the entrance and opening the door. I blinked blankly as I met eyes with Kianna, whom was carrying a rather large briefcase. “Uhm... hey,” I sputtered, a little confused. Usually she had her goons with her, at least one anyway.

“Hey hotshot,” she spoke back. “How's things... damn, did I ever tell you you've got a nice place?” she commented, myself scratching the back of my head.

“Uhm... no. I don't uhh... recall you ever coming by,” I mentioned and she casually shrugged it off.

“Well... in that case, nice crib,” she complimented and I just rolled my eye.

“I take it this isn't a social call?” I remarked, the merc woman just sighing.

“God... straight to the point huh? Can I come in?” she asked and I figured there was no danger in doing so. Giving her free passage, the woman and I proceeded into the kitchen where she quickly began rummaging through my fridge.

“Where's your drinks?” she asked and I blinked.

“Uhm... well, they should be right there... There's orange juice. And uhh... some fruit punch... and uhh-” she cut me off with a stupid look.

“Beer, you piss ant,” she shot and I just scratched the top of my head. I did have some hard cider, courtesy of Mac, but I wasn't keen on sharing it with a mercenary acquaintance.

“Well, I uhh... I don't drink anymore,” I informed her and she perked an inquiring brow. “Serious. Went clean. Hell, I hardly get to enjoy chewing on my cigar,” I informed her and she sighed before taking out a milk jar and pouring herself a glass.

As she started to take a drink I gasped. “Wai-wai-wait!” I yelped and she stopped mid-drink. “You... uhh... that's Lassie's... she uhm...” Kianna looked to me, cup still to her lips. I placed my hand over my face. “She wants to start a sperm bank...” I groaned, Kianna immediately spewing out her mouthful and beginning to gag.

“BWALCH! WHAT THE FUCK!” she boomed and I began to cackle with laughter. She looked to me. “THIS ISN'T FUNNY!” she screamed and I nodded wholeheartedly.

“Actually... yeah... y-yeah, it kinda is,” I chuckled, Kianna giving me a stern glare. “I-it's... it's just milk... ha-ha-ha-ha...” I continued to laugh while the merc tongued around inside her mouth.

“That's not cool...” she grumbled and I stifled a snicker while she poured herself another glass.

“You think I'd let her start her business from my fridge?” I asked, Kianna shuddering at the thought.

“I'm seriously concerned about her attitude problem. Dogs don't generally act like her...” she muttered.

“Well, actually she's not really a regular dog,” I replied and Kianna shot me a look.

“Ah-durr? Really?” she asked rhetorically and I just laughed.

“Yeah. Really. She was some... whatever, created in the Milf and Malf factory. They called them NYMPHOs...” I trailed off as Kianna rose a brow. “I don't know what it stands for. Irregardless, whatever she really is... to me, she's still my dog and I'll never treat her differently.”

“Anyyyyyway,” Kianna sighed as she poured herself yet another glass then offered me the milk bottle.

“Nah, I'm good. I'll probably have some orange juice.” I leaned on the counter as she pounded back her glass of milk. I looked to her with a risen brow. “So... like I asked earlier... I take it your not here for a friendly hello...” I trailed off and Kianna licked her lips.

“'Fraid not, Stud. Got me a buyer for them guns I got locked up in the cargo plane-” I cut her short.

“Woah-woah-woah-WOAH! No gun runnin-” she cut me short.

“Relax, Stud. It's on the other side of the world. Place you never heard about where war is the norm and such a shithole it never even makes the sideline for newspapers here. It's not like it'll ever come back to Equestria,” she mentioned.

“It's not right,” I told her and she scoffed.

“And who are you to say what's right and wrong? I bet it didn't even faze you back on Earth... gun runners slipping machine guns to towel heads. Assault rifles to Mexican Cartel... listen, there's this... shitty would-be country and it's run by two warring factions that have been spilling blood for decades. One of the leaders just came to me and requested all my weapons for a huge sum. It's enough that Dwayne and I could live as comfortably as you... Now here's the kicker for you. This warring nation? They're like any nation in this weird ass world. Completely primitive, except these guys are third-worlders, so they're even more primitive than Equestria's army... I'm talking sticks and stones here...”

I leaned on the counter with a dissatisfied look. I didn't like the concept of firearms running amuck in this world. Back home on Earth just about every nation had some kind of armed military as a deterrent against the other. Here, whomever had the guns would reign supreme. I didn't like it at all.

“So whomever I give the guns to will become the technologically superior faction and quickly end the conflict. Yeah, there will be bloodshed, but less than if we don't arm our buyers. You think that if they don't get the guns that they'll stop killing each other? They've been doing this for years,” she stated. I perked a brow.

“'Our' buyers?” I asked and she grunted.

“Listen... this is good money we're talking about. Even if we split this fifty-fifty, Dwayne and I can get out clean and... ride off into the sunset. Does that put it into perspective for you, Hayseed?” she asked, making me snicker.

“You and Dwayne?” I asked and she nodded. “What about Senka and Brick?” I asked and she let out a sigh.

“Senka's MIA, presumed dead. Sent her on a solo-op and she just... anyway. Wires on the detonator went bad on one of our other covert ops and Brick stayed behind to manually detonate the bomb to collapse the tunnel so the... well, it's safe to say he's officially KIA...” she mentioned.

“So that just leaves Dwayne and you, eh?” I asked and she nodded.

“And I want... no, I need! A way out... and this is my ticket man! OUR ticket!” she stated and I let out a rather long sigh.

“Listen... the... my glory days... the... being a renowned action hero and... saving the day at the last minute... it's over. I'm gonna be a dad soon... I got a nice place... I just... I dunno, I'm done, you know?” I asked. She looked to me seriously but it soon became apparent to her I no longer wanted to live a fighter and just settle down.

Kianna tossed her briefcase up on the table and opened it, revealing the two railgun prototypes from the Manehatten incident. “Sweet Celestia... the fuck?” I asked and she nodded.

“Picked them up in Manehatten. One I got off a junk dealer, the other in an evidence locker at the police station. Dwayne found the intel on them... these are what made you a hero...” she tried to persuade me.

I looked at the weapons, flashes of that eventful night replaying in my mind as I remembered the absurd ultra-violent assault on the dock along with the attack on the Gravelli warehouse. It was fun... I loved every minute of it... the heart pumping adrenaline... the explosions... My hand wavered forwards and touched one of the over powered weapons.

The cold steel sent shivers up my back. I licked my lips but just before I could pick up the weapon, I instead closed the case. Kianna looked at me strangely. “This isn't the kind of work that makes you a hero... let it go,” I told her and she went to object but I instead pushed the weapon briefcase closer to her. “Let-it-go,” I nearly whispered.

Kianna retrieved the case and sighed. “Fine... but if you do change your mind, come see Dwayne and me down at that little refueling station of yours,” she told me, my brow rising. “That's right numb-skull... been operating right under your noses...” she laughed before walking away, leaving me in thought.

Making sure she had finally left with a peek down the hallway stairs, I stepped over to the cupboards and fished out the mason jar of alcoholic apple cider, pouring myself a hefty glass before hiding it away and making my way back to the living room where I had previously resided.

Taking a seat, I retrieved the book 'The Art of Peace' and began where I had last left off, reading about learning to respect and love nature...

Hours past without me taking much notice and I got a bit of a sudden jump when there was another knock at the door. “Come in! It's open!” I called out as I continued to read. Again knocking.

“For fu...” I trailed off, setting my book aside as I hurried to the door. 'Goddammit Kianna... the fucking door is open. You were just here five secon-' I cut my thoughts short as I opened the door, my heart immediately skipping a beat as my stomach seemed to twist, my face going pale and my entire demeanor changing.

“Guh... ugh... I... teh...” I gasped, taking a staggering step back. In my doorway stood...

My thoughts conflicted with one another, making me wince and twitch my eye. “Evan... is that you?” she asked. I took another weary step back as I struggled to breathe. It couldn't be... she hated me... she didn't want me... no, no this was some kind of trick.

The lavender alicorn went to step forwards but her gloomy look spread across her face as her hoof retracted. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come here..." she whispered softly.

“Tw... Muh... mo... Twil...” I struggled with my words, unable to think. My chest heaved while I struggled to think properly. As I staggered back another step, my foot landed on thin air, as I was stepping onto the staircase leading downstairs.

Losing my balance, I ended up tumbling down the flight of stairs, banging my head several times in the process. I groaned and rubbed the back of my head as I heard my mo... my... her, cry out in panic.

“Evan... good goddess, are you alright?” she asked as she cradled me in her hooves. I looked into her eyes with my own... those beautiful violet eyes of hers... I hadn't seen them this close in so long...

“Are you... really here?” I asked in a daze, the alicorn nodding. I was so caught up in my words, not knowing what to say... I thought she hated me...

I opened my mouth to say something. “I... ah... ahh... ahhh...” I felt a little dizzy and tingly. Twilight looked to me with a concerned look. “AH-CHOO!” I brought my forearm over my face just in time to catch the sneeze, feeling a little light headed afterwards.

“Oh goddess, EVAN!” she gasped, and I caught sight of what she was so panicked about. My sneeze had drawn a nosebleed, and also splattered blood all over my arm.

“No, no... it's alright... just hit my head a little hard... you know?” I asked with a dazed, and rather faint, smile. She continued to cradle me with her forelegs, before huffing.

“Jeez... you've put on a lot of weight...” she said, struggling a little to keep me up. I sat up and crawled over to a hallway wall, leaning myself up against it, Twilight sitting against the opposite wall.

“Evan?” she asked, a long quiet pause existing between us. There wasn't... tension or... hatred... or sadness... or anything really...

“Yeah?” I asked back, rather weakly.

“Goddess, I've forgotten what you look like...” she nearly giggled, a few tears coming to her eyes.

“Twi... muh... I don't know...” I tried to struggle over my feelings. Half of them were telling me she was my mother, the other half telling me she didn't love me anymore.

“You don't know what?” she asked and I bit my lip.

“Are you... here?” I asked and she nearly gasped, holding back her tears.

“Yes!” she gasped out, myself getting choked on my words. This was so difficult.

“Wh... why?” I asked, struggling with my words, and she wept a little.

“D-do you... not want me to be?” she asked fretfully.

“No... I mean yes! I mean... I don't... I like you being here... I don't mind...” I began to hold back my own tears. We sat there for a good while, both holding our emotions in check. “I didn't mean to... I didn't want to hurt you mom... I'm so sorry,” I began to break down, sobbing to myself. My chest felt so heavy... the tears blurring my vision. “I just wanted to impress you... THAT'S ALL!” I wept, beginning to sob uncontrollably.

She scooched over to my side and held me close. “You never needed to... you didn't...” she pressed her head to mine. “I always loved you...” she whispered. I was shuddering a little with wretched emotions... it made me feel weak and helpless.

Twilight pressed her cheek to mine and I could feel the dampness from her own tears. “I just... why did you do it? All those ponies...” she asked, making my heart twist and skip a beat.

“I just... it was Derpy...” I whispered and she looked to me.

“What do you mean it was Derpy?” she asked.

“It was all just a big mistake... everything, all of it... I was just supposed to deliver some... some kinda magic recipe that could end world hunger... or something like that... It was just supposed to be a delivery to Manehatten.” I huffed and caught my breath as I remembered that fateful day. “I met Derpy and she was going to show me the way... we met a mugger who threatened to kill her and... and I killed him... I just... I shot him and then Derpy left but some... some mobsters caught her and held her ransom. Said they'd kill her if I didn't give them the recipe so I... Derreck and me... we killed them... all of them... and then I destroyed the recipe so it could never be fought over again... it was all for nothing...” I wept.

“And what about all the others... over the last few months?” she asked softly.

“It wasn't me... it was Derreck... his idea of bringing the legend back to life...” I whimpered softly.

“Who is Derreck?” she asked and I bit my lip.

“My oldest friend... he's here... in Equestria... he protects me... he protects a lot of ponies... when I can't,” I answered honestly. We sat quietly for a good long while before Twilight went to speak.

“What if-” she was cut short by a small beeping noise, looking to the wrist of her foreleg, where a watch resided. “Oh shoot... I gotta get back to Ponyville...” she looked to me and gave me a kiss to the cheek.

“The day after tomorrow... can you come meet me in Ponyville?... I'd like to talk with you again,” she asked and I was a little caught up in my words.

“Me?” I asked and she nodded. “I... you want to... talk to me?” I asked and she nodded.

“Please?” she asked and I nodded. “Pinkie Pie Promise?” I went through the motions.

“You have my word,” I replied and she gave me a genuine smile... one I hadn't seen her give me in months. And with that she was leaving and before I could even think, she was gone. I was so... mind blown. What just happened?

I walked back upstairs with a bit of sway. “Sir?” Alfred asked as he trotted up to me. “Is everything alright?” he asked and I was still a little more than confused.

“I don't know...” I replied, my butler raising a brow. “I think I just need to... lay down...” I replied. My world had been split in two... I didn't know what to think about anything...

I laid across the couch in the living room and snuggled up with myself...

* * *

I awoke to the slamming of the front door. “I'm home, yeah big lug!” Lassie called out as I shook off my post-nap daze. Everything... was so weird... was that all just a big dream? A dream inside a dream?

Last thing I remember was Evan talking to Twilight and...

“Hey D, where you at? I brought pizza!” Lassie called out, myself looking at my watch. It was late... but if it wasn't all a dream, than it was still the same day...

I stood up and greeted my pooch, whom had an armfull of pizza boxes that smelled rather good. “Whatcha get?” I asked.

“One of everything, duhhh,” she laughed, myself joining in. Trixie entered right behind Lassie with a few of her own boxes of treats levitated high above her head. As I leaned against the railing of the staircase, Lassie looked to me. “Wanna clear off a spot on the table. I want some of the bread sticks before they go cold,” she told me.

I chuckled to myself as I walked over to the living room table, clearing it off as my friends made their way up. Setting down the boxes, I looked to the bill and rose a brow. “How'd you pay for all this?” I asked, Lassie snickering.

“I blew the cashier,” she remarked, making me chuckle. Figures she'd say something like that. “Nah, I just put it on your tab,” she replied, a little more honestly.

“Figures.” I stifled a laugh and Lassie was quick to joke back.

“Yeah, well I can imagine you'll probably eat a fair share of it-” she cut herself short as she looked past me. “Yo, Alfred, come on over and have some pizza with us,” she called out to the butler whom gave her a rather plain look.

I waved him over. “Come on dude, take a load off. I won't hold it against you,” I assured him, the butler sighing.

“If you insist, sir,” he replied, coming over and taking a seat. We all sat around, telling jokes and reminiscing on old times. Each one of us had our own set of bad circumstances in which would make others question our morals...

Trixie with her... problems in Ponyville. Lassie with her obnoxious sexual tendencies. Alfred with his... mobster ties. And myself with my... endeavors. In the end though, none of us were really bad... in fact, we were all good in our own ways.

As I went to take another slice of pizza, it was suddenly taken from my grasp in a dark blue magical aura, just as a pair of soft wet lips pressed to my cheek. I looked over to my wonderful lover and smiled.

Even she wasn't really all bad either...

As we sat together, conversing on old times, Lassie brought up a topic that was rather... strange and weird for her. “I want to go golfing,” she stated, making us all look to her. “What?! I saw it on TV the other day. A bunch of old retired geezers like us. Swinging a metal club at a ball and trying to get it in a hole. I think it'd be fun!” she said.

Alfred tipped his glass of tea, taking a small sip. “I do say... it is a rather enjoyable game and I could teach you all a thing or two... your estate's back yard is large enough to get some practice,” he stated, Lassie squeaking with joy.

“Alright! I've always wanted to see Derreck in a polo shirt!” she commented, making me groan which in turn had her cackling in laughter. Moon kissed my cheek with a slight giggle.

“I think she's right. You would look cute in a polo shirt,” she teased before going silent with a rather pale face.

“What?” I asked and her ear flapped.

“I sense a presence that I've not felt in...” she trailed off just as there was a knock at the door...

Author's Note

Alright, so there's another chapter out.

Now I just wanna get something off my chest so I don't attempt it. I was originally gonna have it that Nightmare Moon had possessed Derreck and wasn't actually there, it was just her spiritual embodiment, just like how Derreck isn't really there. It would explain his damaged eye slanting like Nightmare's, how he could constantly wield The Shadow Blade. Her soul would've possessed him through the Shadow Steel she had embedded on his skeleton which... Anyway, I was gonna have it that Nightmare would possess Derreck and have him slowly tear the Mane 6's friendship apart as she knew she couldn't beat them altogether. Just like how he/she had Dash side with him and have her bicker with AJ, Derreck/Nightmare would slowly pull every one of the Mane 6 apart and have them squabble amongst each other and finally strike when they could no longer retaliate against her. In the end it would be Derreck whom would have to, emotionally, kill his former lover... I know, it would've probably been a way greater plot-twist and totally unexpected and awesome, and now that I've said it you probably wish I had've done that instead but... no more side plots. The story is almost over and everything has seemingly fallen into place. Everything in this story has kinda clicked together like a puzzle for this story's finality...

Anywho, on a lighter note, cheers eh.