6 Past Lives

Beta woke when Mac clomped loudly on his door, smiling, knowing what the blue ear’s head must feel like. He wasn't going to make it easy on him, however. He had to learn, Mac chuckled to himself."Wake up boy" he boomed through the door. "It’s nearly an hour past dawn!" he fought to hold in his laughter. He wondered if Apple Berry had tried to move on him. He imagined not, especially if he was too drunk to consent. She was a good mare after all.

Clomping again, hard, on Beta’s door, Mac was taking a little too much glee in Beta’s pain. He remembered when he had first gotten drunk on “Midnight Cider”... the hangovers were murder. He was going to have some fun with him. “Come on, if you can’t work hungover, I can’t let you come to any more parties” he boomed much, MUCH louder than he had to. Between the hangover and Beta’s long rabbit ears, he knew that HAD to hurt... Mac decided he would tone it back before he pissed Beta off and got a bite taken out of his hide.

“Do you HAVE to boom so much?” Beta asked, rubbing his pounding head “and where the hell is the water tap?” he asked, forgetting where he was for a moment “Oh, right... never mind”

“Oh, we got plumbing, just not out here” Mac replied a little sourly, seeing the look of ‘I'm from a technologically superior plane of existence’ on Beta’s face through the window.

“Sorry” Beta said to the unspoken response to the unspoken insult, his ears against his back, down in a sign of contrition.

"Don’t worry about it. You didn’t mean to be a satyr about it" Mac said off hoofedly. Beta realized this was probably the first racial slur he’d heard here in Equestria. He had known there were other two legged races here... somewhere, but until now, didn’t know how they were regarded. 'Apparently not well.' Beta reflected

Mac opened Beta's front door and let himself in. It wasn't as though it was, or could be, locked or anything. He decided to have pity on Beta, and shook his rump until Beta noticed the saddle bags. “There’s some water in there for you. I’m not completely evil you know” Mac said with a smile. It didn’t help that when Beta got the water flask from the bag, he noticed something under the bags that made him blush very red. Mac had relieved himself earlier in the bushes and decided not to ‘zip up’, knowing it would tease Beta terribly. Mac might not be evil, but he certainly understood the concept.

“You’re really enjoying yourself aren’t you boss?” Beta asked dryly, holding onto the water flask, slowly drinking as they began walking back to the farm.

“Maybe a little more than I should” Mac said, still smiling and blushing just a tiny bit, embarrassed at how flattered he was by Beta’s long glance and blushing. "You've earned a good look" Mac said, winking and smiling at Beta “Applejack is right, you are cute when you blush.” Beta wasn’t sure if Mac was teasing or flirting with him... knowing Big Mac a bit of both.

"So... I noticed a few of your cousins were looking pretty hard at you last night” Beta said in a teasing manner to Mac.

"One or two of them got my hardness too" Mac replied smiling. "It's a bit if a blur because of the cider. Maybe three." he added unsure. Beta’s jaw dropped.

"I was kidding!"

"I wasn't" Mac replied, smiling very broadly. "They were great! The twins for sure, I think"

"You really shagged your cousins?” Beta asked a mixture of incredulousness and admiration in his voice.

“3rd cousins 5 times removed.” Mac replied very nonchalantly “We share a great uncle somewhere I think. Look, Beta “Cousin” is a VERY loose term for someone you’re kinda sorta related to. They’re not complaining and neither am I.”

"It was great fun. Besides who knows when and if I’ll see any of them again. These family get together are always kind of random who and when." Mac finished with a dismissive air. He really appreciated Beta’s point of view, but he didn’t understand... 'maybe it was time I bothered to explain to him.' Big Mac thought. “Hell, Beta, I’m closer to the ponies of Ponyville than I am to most of my family."

"Half of which I’m sure you’ve also bagged.” Beta said with a sly smile. “That’s another thing Mac...” Beta began, smiling more, and blushing as he began to seriously notice Mac’s  “unzipped” status had ‘gotten worse’ discussing his previous night’s conquests. “How many ponies HAVE you jumped?" This caused both a pleasant reaction and for Mac to begin to blush mightily.

“Not as many as you think, you dirty, horny, long-eared blue rabbit!” he retorted, his cheeks becoming redder than his fur, but he still smiled.

“I certainly made my rounds in Canterlot... and Fillydelphia... and New Yolk... and... um...” he paused realizing how it sounded... of course, it couldn’t sound any other way because it WAS true after all. “Strictly percentage wise” Mac began and Beta HAD to hear this excuse ”I’ve had fewer fillies than cousins...” and immediately regretting saying that, as Beta just let out a loud, barking laugh.

“Dear god, it’s amazing that there aren’t’ little red colts running around everywhere!” Beta said, as he began to laugh.

"I try to keep a low profile now that I’m no longer a royal guard. The fillies I’ve been with understood it was never going to be serious. And IF there are little red ponies out there, their mothers knew it was never going to last. I’m usually... careful. Like last night"

Beta’s ears went up at that. "You mean you have things like condoms?” he asked. He seriously hadn’t considered that because of their hooves being possible.

“Con-what? I swear boy, you use the strangest words sometimes. No, there are berries that grow naturally that control… issues. I had some last night and so did the girls. They are a natural contraceptive. They were in the big bowl that everyone wasn't looking at and nearly everyone had some from. Didn't you try the berries?" he asked with a little concern in his voice? 'Did Apple Berry?' he wondered...

Now that he thought about it, he could smell her on him. A lot on him. He was beginning to wonder if she had resisted him. Or what happened last night. would that be a sore subject? They WERE talking about conquests after all

"Oh yeah. In that big bowl. I think I licked one, bloody nasty tasting. Well not like I needed it anyway” Beta said with a self-deprecating laugh. Mac laughed long, nervously with him... he really had no idea. Did he? Mac thought. He vaguely recalled that Apple Berry had not had any of the berries also. That did not bode well.

"Um Beta... Do you remember what happened after you left the party last night?" Mac asked seriously

"Um... I... it's kind of hazy" he replied, wishing he still had his main nannite farm. They prevented alcohol from fuzzing up his mind. This was, in fact, his first time being drunk... and he wasn't sure how much he liked it.

"Apple Berry carried me home, I vaguely remember her saying something as she was leaving" in truth he remembered very well what she said. It was after that which was hazy.  "Then I woke up with you pounding on the door like a mad pony, and that's all. Apple Berry was long gone" he finished, almost sad. Actually part of him wouldn't have minded waking up next to her. She had a wonderful scent, and his feelings for her were growing, but in what direction he did not yet know.

Mac decided to steer the conversation in a different if somewhat darker direction. He needed to.

"Look boy... it’s not like I go around banging ponies in Ponyville. Hell I’ve probably had more cousins than locals." Then he blushed realizing how bad THAT sounded. Beta laughed harder, stopping, leaning on Mac for breath.

"Oh gods Mac, that doesn’t help your case any." Beta said between breaths, laughing harder

"Look!" Mac said rounding on Beta with a very serious, mildly upset look on his long face. "Do you know how THEY see me?" he asked, his hoof pointing outwards. "They see me as the lovable, DUMB labor."  Beta stopped laughing, his ears falling again, whiskers drooping slightly.

Mac then said in a high-pitched, taunting voice “Oh Big Mac, you’re so strong” He was on his hind legs now, fore hooves clopped together by his head, feigning the look a filly might give him to entice him to do some menial task.

“Can you possibly move this large rock, or trunk, or pull this or that or” he then dropped his tone as he dropped to all 4’s again. "...Or some other damned thing around"

Rolling his eyes Mac continued his rant. It was clear to Beta he desperately needed to get this off his chest. Mac had been holding this in for years. And he hadn’t had a male friend like Beta to confide in before.

“Oh yes, they just LOVE me in town.” He then looked at Beta with a sad look of almost isolation on his red, freckled face. “I’m their dumb labor, ‘ah-yup’.” he said in his usual 'around town tone' Beta noticed he donned when he was around fillies. “Beta... my sex life has dropped to almost NOTHING since I moved back to take care of the farm. If I get a chance to get laid here and there, I’m certainly NOT going to pass it by." he said in an almost pleading tone.

"Besides..." and his tone got even sadder “they don’t see me as anything more than a dumb hick they can use for sex and toss aside. I’m... nothing to them.” he finished, hanging his head low, giving a long, sad nose-flapping sigh. Beta sensed Mac was ready to cry. Then he looked up to Beta, tears on the verge of forming.

“And you know what? I’d give up what I have of a sex life if I had a love life of any kind. You have no idea how jealous of you I am..." he said miserably. "You may not realize this, but two very beautiful mares care dearly for you." This caught Beta quite off guard. He assumed Mac meant Apple Berry and Rainbow Dash... he knew how Apple Berry felt... He wasn't so sure about Rainbow Dash. She had plans for her life. He somehow didn't see her settling down for him... nor should she.

Beta tried to steer the conversation into hopefully happier thoughts. “But surely you’ve had a proper girlfriend before? Someone you did things with on Valentine’s Day” he said. Mac MUST have had relationships. Hell, even a memory of a bad one had to get him out of this funk. He wasn’t prepared for what he heard next.

Big Mac smiled and took in a deep breath and raised his head. Then he looked confused... “Val en what? I swear boy, if you don’t start using real words I’m gonna clop you upside the head until you do” Beta laughed nervously as Mac laughed hard as Beta’s discomfort.

Beta was genuinely curious, especially considering the looks Mac always got around fillies. Sighing heavily and neighing just a little Mac pondered a moment

“Yes. Once. Apple Bloom’s teacher and I... we were very close once” Mac said. His eyes then looked far away into the past, and he smiled more. "She’s an amazing filly. Smart, strong, great with kids, and damned good looking. That flank of her's is the best I’ve ever seen Beta, and I’ve seen a LOT of flanks” he chuckled, Beta let out a genuine laugh, glad the tone had improved, and knowing that if Mac said she had a great ass, she had a great ass! Beta’s eyes wandered and popped open. It would seem Mac REALLY missed her great flanks...

Big Mac saw Beta’s expression, dangling tongue and where he was staring and blushed. He had been thinking about all those amazing nights with Cheerilee. ‘Oh, if only, boy’ Mac thought, flattered at Beta’s ‘approval’.  ‘If things were a little different, I wouldn’t mind going a few rounds in the hay with you.’ Mac decided.

“She was the most amazing love I’d ever had... I proposed to her. I offered to quit the guard for her even, and settle down here in Ponyville... which I called a third-rate dust bin.” Beta laughed, he wasn’t about to disagree with that assessment, really.  “I had been living in the palace, in utter comfort. Mind you. Between missions, which were terribly dangerous at times, I lived a near royal life.

“What happened?” Beta pressed

“Well... let’s just say we had a difference in our given professions. She didn’t want to be the mare of a…” and Mac’s voice broke and he halted looking miserable. “A... murderer.” he said finally, heavily. Beta didn’t really understand. He was an assassin. His life was killing bad people. 'Mac was protecting the land. How was any of that bad?' Beta wondered.

“It’s different here than your world, Beta. What I did... is not looked kindly upon. That’s why very few ponies even know WHAT the Royal Guard does, let alone the advanced elites. Remember this is a little filly’s paradise... and blood cannot be spilled in paradise. Hell, you’re mere existence, let alone presence here is “harmful”, according to the Advanced Royal Guard’s charter.” he finished. Beta swallowed hard. Mac was right, he was a random element. And possibly one that could endanger his life.

"What about YOU, blue boy. Have you ever loved someone? Heck, are you a virgin?" he asked... wondering if last night was possibly his first time. Mac had already put two and two together and gotten... trouble. Beta… Well depending on his answer, Beta didn’t need to know Mac's thoughts

"No... n-not really" he said matter of factly. "I mean there was a vixen in my team who I kind of liked... but…" he trailed off. "It’s not like I haven’t had sex before it’s just..." he trailed off again, as though to grab a strand of thought that was evasive to him.  "They... I... it wasn’t unpleasant. But it was always as their beck and call. I'd arrive in their chambers and..." Beta shrugged. "They would say something and it all gets kind of fuzzy after that." He then paused, tears beginning to fill his eyes. He now realized what happened those nights. "They even robbed me of what little pleasure I could have had!"

"I sometimes wondered if that was one of the reasons they kept me awake." he said unsure of himself again.

"How do you mean awake?" Mac asked, confused.

"Well most of the furries, that's what I am by the way... a Furry, stayed in maturation chambers. They'd be growing older, more mature, faster. They could be programmed with information... I can’t be, you see. Since I was the first successful furry they made... I'm... I’m a Beta test. The test before you perfect a process. I'm..." Beta's resolve and self worth he'd been building up since that first outbreak, was beginning to crack.

"I’m imperfect... I can’t be programmed, I can’t have information uploaded to my brain nor downloaded. I am not compatible... but they did learn a lot from me" he said quickly as though he wanted to prove his worth to Mac. That he really wasn’t a waste of material, like some of the meaner scientists would say to him.

Mac put his long neck and head on Beta's shoulder, 'hugging' him, as horses do, cooing soothingly. "You have worth simply by being alive, Beta... value and worth" he said, wondering what exactly he meant... and to who...

"But I learn very fast, super-fast, I have a near perfect memory for details and information." he added quickly, wanting to sound worthy, also a bit of pride sneaking in. "I read all kinds of books on engineering, cooking, chemistry, and such. But I was never as good as Alpha at medical stuff." Mac interrupted

"Alpha? Who is that?” But a thought was already forming in Mac's head.

"She was the doctor on the team. She put us all back together when we'd get shot or... what have you." Beta added nonchalantly.

Beta's mind jumped back to the scientists... "They... they would take me away for … ‘tests’ they... well... you know. It wasn’t unpleasant but.. I never got to choose when or where. I..." then tears began to fall from his blue eyes. “I was their sex toy... it felt nice enough, but I was always at their whim, I couldn’t stop them and I could not say no. They would say something to me...“ then the gravity of what he was saying hit him like a ton of bricks... he couldn’t say out loud what was screaming in his mind now... ‘they raped me!’

Mac already picked up on this and decided that Apple Berry’s transgression... would remain a secret. The knowledge of it would only hurt him further. He liked Beta... he REALLY liked Beta. He was a good ... stallion. He didn’t deserve to know that Apple Berry may have used him last night. He wondered if she'd even realized it. It was a pity, Mac thought. if she had been more patient, Mac would have even helped her and Beta get together. He felt they were probably good for each other. She needed a loving male, and he needed a strong, loving, but stable person in his life. Now... now that might never happen and they would both be the poorer for it. But Mac suspected Apple Berry would be the worse off.... unless... then he shook off the idea. A rabbit - fox impregnating a horse... impossible; but if friendship was magic...

“Don’t you ever worry about being the only one of your kind Beta?” Mac asked, praying the answer was 'Yes Mac. I can’t have kids'.

“Not really.” Beta said “Part of my genetic enhancement, at least in theory, is that I can impregnate any fertile female.” ‘Fuck’ Mac stopped cold. ‘Apple Berry...’ he thought...

“What’s wrong Mac?” Mac shook his head

“Nothing, just remembered something. Nothing important.”

"Tell me more about this vixen of your’s” Mac pressed. She was starting to sound distressingly familiar. He knew he’d have to tell Beta the whole story of the girl he refused to kill. That she was a purple vixen. That she was a very gifted doctor. That she had a strange way of speaking just like... Beta.... ‘Bucking Hell!’ Mac thought.

"Well" Beta started, not noticing Mac’s sudden thoughtfulness and look of distress. "To tell you that, I need to tell you about my team. The Freak Force Four!" he said spreading his paws wide as though unrolling a scroll before him. "Team... Beta"