There was not a sound in the room as Pinkie Pie sat down on her bed, looking forlornly at the wall in her vision. She was holding her alligator, Gummy, and she tightened her grip as she thought about how much had gone wrong since the Changelings invaded Canterlot.
It had first been a simple cough, something everypony had dismissed as a cold, but it quickly grew into hacking fits and bouts of wheezing. She had been scared for the first time since... forever, and she had no idea what was going on. It had gotten so bad that her friends had taken her to the doctor to get her examined.
The results had sent her into a pit from which she knew she would never return from. She had learned that a form of exoskeleton was crystallizing over her lungs, turning them into... something. The hard shell was constricting her air supply, and the doctors said they had no idea how to fix it. At that point, Pinkie had run from the building, crying openly. It was then that she locked herself into her room, refusing to come out for anypony.
Pinkie knew that what she was doing was stupid and thoughtless, but if she was going to die, she did not want her friends to see her when she did. She was not sure on what they would do about the locked door when she did die, but she was positive that somepony would break it down or something.
There was a knock at said door.
"Pinkie?!" Mrs. Cake called from outside.
Pinkie sighed and rolled back onto her bed, clutching Gummy to her abdomen. She closed her eyes and waited until the sound of retreating hoofsteps met her ears. When it was over, Pinkie walked over to the window, opening it up and looking outside.
Cold air splashed onto her face, and she shivered slightly as the chill passed through her. As she stared, an envelope fell from the sky, floating gracefully down to the window and blowing inside. It flew past Pinkie and landed on her bed.
Pinkie looked up and saw, as expected, Ditzy Doo coming down, chasing after the lost letter. Pinkie went and grabbed the paper, bringing it back to the window. As Ditzy reached her, she held it out to her.
"Oh, thanks, Pinkie!" the clumsy mare said, taking the envelope and putting it back in her mailbag.
"No problem," Pinkie whispered, turning away from the pegasus as she flew away.
Pinkie went back to her bed, leaving the window open, and set Gummy down on it. She was about to go over to the most shadowy corner of the room when she heard the sound of wings flapping.
"Go away," she said, turning to face whoever it was.
"Something seemed wrong," Ditzy said, peering at Pinkie. "Oh, I know! What's wrong?"
Pinkie only scowled and sat down on the floor, refusing to move her jaw.
"It's not going to get better unless you tell somepony about it," the mailmare said, still hovering haphazardly outside of the window.
Pinkie just shook her head, letting her mane fall down in front of her eyes, whereas usually it fell down the sides of her face. Ditzy flew in and landed beside Pinkie, who turned away.
"I have experience with this, Pinkie," she said. "When I babysit Dinky, she won't want to tell me something because it scares her. What are you scared about?"
"I- I'm scared of what my friends will do when I'm gone," she said, feeling a hoof touch her shoulder. "I'm afraid of what will happen without me here to make ponies happy or make them smile. I'm afraid that without parties, everypony will be sad and lonely."
A lone tear ran down Pinkie's cheek as she started to cry, thinking of what she did not want to happen.
"I don't want my friends to feel lost or hopeless," she said, beginning to cry full out now. "I- I don't want them to be sad or angry or in pain! I just want my friends to feel happy and grateful and joyful!"
"I understand," Ditzy said, wrapping her hooves around Pinkie. "You want the best for them, but you know that you can't provide it."
Pinkie hung her head as she continued.
"I want to make ponies happy!" she cried. "But I can't do that if I'm dead! I can't give ponies what they need if I'm buried in a casket under the ground! I can't make anypony happy by being dead! I'll only make them bitter and sad and angry! I'll only make them wish for me back! I don't want them to be like that. I want them to rejoice in the fact that they still live another day and keep breathing."
Ditzy hugged Pinkie.
"It's okay," Ditzy said. "I want to help other ponies too. But I can't. I'm just a klutz who has no chance at ever being a help or guidance to another pony. I'm just a burden upon my workers and upon all of my friends. But I know that I still make them happy, whether it be they are grateful that they are not like me or because they are happy about the fact that I still live like a normal pony and my personality makes up for my difference. I know that ponies whisper things about me behind their backs, that they laugh when I'm not looking, but I know that I'm a great mare, and a least one pony will have been happy to have known me."
Pinkie hugged her back, stopping her crying and embracing her fate.
"Thank you," Pinkie said. "Thank you for letting me see that."
"You're welcome," the mailmare replied, letting go of Pinkie.
"'Bye," she told Ditzy, who was walking towards the window. "Thank you again for being so helpful. I wish I could do something to pay you back."
"It's fine," the pegasus said as she flew off.
Pinkie went to the window and watched her go, eyes starting to develop a joyous overtone. Her mane and tail began to expand, slowly returning to normal.
"At least one pony will have been happy to know me," she said, smiling. "And I know that I'm a great mare."
Pinkie walked over to the door outside and opened it up. She began to walk down the stairs and went into the main floor of Sugarcube Corner. Mrs. Cake was standing with Mr. Cake behind the counter, engaged in conversation.
"Hi!" Pinkie said happily, coming beside them.
They jumped.
"Pinkie?!" Mrs. Cake said incredulously.
"That's me!" the party pony replied. "I just had a talk and, well, I want to make you all happy before I die so that when I do, you have a better something to remember me by."
Mrs. Cake and Mr. Cake hugged her, tears on their cheeks.
"Thank you for not staying locked up," Mrs. Cake said. "I couldn't stand the thought of you being alone for the rest of your days."
"It's okay," Pinkie said, hugging the two back.
As she looked out of the windows of the building, she saw Ditzy past by. The mailmare looked in and saw them. She smiled.
And Pinkie smiled back.
~
Pinkie placed the last balloon on the table and admired her work proudly, albeit a bit pained, for her breathing had become difficult for the past few days.
"Take a good look, Pinkie," she told herself. "This could be the last party you ever throw for anypony. You have to make it something ponies will remember you by."
She closed her eyes and only listened to herself wheeze for a minute.
"I am a great mare," she said, opening them. "And at least one pony will be affected positively by my existence."
She turned and went to the kitchen of Sugarcube Corner, where Mr. Cake was busy baking some treats for the party.
"Thank you," she said to him smiling.
"You've already said that at least a dozen times, Pinkie," he replied, not taking his attention from the pastry he was working on."
"I know. But I can't thank you enough!"
"I think you already have by coming out of your proverbial shell and talking again."
"But I talked before I came out!" Pinkie said, confused.
"Not to anypony but yourself."
"No, I spoke to-"
Pinkie stopped, realizing that she wanted to congratulate Ditzy at the party tonight and let everypony know what the mailmare had done for her.
"Nevermind," she said. "Is there anyway I can help you?"
"Yes," Mr. Cake said. "You can preheat the oven for me. I like to have it ready when I finish preparing some treats."
Pinkie trotted over to the oven and flicked a few switches. A light flashed on inside, and Pinkie walked off, a hacking cough interrupting the normality. As she passed by the door, she was assaulted by five ponies.
"PINKIE!"
The party pony was knocked over as her friends smothered her in their embrace.
"Mrs. Cake came over and told us the news!" Twilight said. "We ran as fast as we could!"
Pinkie laughed, but was rewarded by a painful stab in her chest, causing her to double up and wince.
"Oh, no," Fluttershy said. "We hurt her."
"No," Pinkie said. "It was just my... sickness."
Pinkie almost said "terminal illness," but she did not want to sound so pessimistic about her fate.
"It's all fine, sugarcube," Applejack said with a grin. "We're here to talk to ya about, well, anything. Doesn't really matter that much."
"Then I want to talk about what ponies think of Ditzy," Pinkie said.
"Ditzy?" Rarity asked, unsure of who was being mentioned. "Isn't that the pegasus with the eye problems?"
"Don't be so rude about it, Rarity," Rainbow Dash said. "I worked with her when she was still on the weather team. She's a cool mare when you get to know her."
"Sorry," Rarity said, averting her eyes. "It's just, I don't really know her that well. In fact, I barely know her at all!"
Pinkie smiled.
"C'mon, let's talk!" she said, hopping in place.
~
"You can go!" Pinkie told her friends. "I need to finish preparing for the party!"
"Okay, Pinkie," Twilight said, waving at her friend as she left. "We'll see you tonight!"
There was a grumble general consensus, and the five friends walked away, chatting amongst themselves.
Pinkie had learned in their conversation about Ditzy that she was held in high approval by most of her friends; Rarity was the exception. All of them were very proud of Ditzy for fighting through her disability and being the best pony that she could be. That had warmed Pinkie's heart to hear, and made her all the more eager to tell everypony about Ditzy at the party.
Pinkie tied a streamer around her hoof and laughed, only to be cut off by a strangled feeling in her chest. She stopped and took the streamer off, frowning.
"Stupid party pooper disease," she muttered.
She pushed a chair over and sat on it, hooves on her chin.
"I wonder why only I got this disease," she mused aloud. "What is it?"
There was no answer to her question as Mr. Cake came out from the kitchen, holding a tray of cupcakes in his mouth.
"Pinkie," he said, his voice muffled by the tray. "We've still got to finish the rest of the preparations."
Pinkie stood, wrapping the streamer back around her hoof as she did so.
"Okay!" she said.
From that point on, Pinkie was all party business.
~
"Hey, Pinkie Pie!" Rainbow Dash said as she, Twilight, Fluttershy, Applejack, and Rarity came into Sugarcube Corner, shaking hooves with Pinkie as they went.
"Hey, girls!" Pinkie replied, a large grin on her face. "Are you ready to party?"
"I'm always ready!" Rainbow Dash said.
Twilight rolled her eyes and joined her friends as they went into the already packed party.
"Wow, Pinkie," Fluttershy said. "You must've invited everypony in town!"
"I did!" the party pony replied, eating a cupcake she had grabbed from one of the treat displays sitting on the tables. "I wanted to make sure everypony was here to hear what I have to say!"
"What do you have to say?" Twilight asked.
"It's a secret!" Pinkie whispered. "So I can't tell you!"
She giggled but immediately doubled over as she coughed heavily.
"Side note," she reminded herself. "Try not to laugh or giggle or guffaw or whoop it up or anything to do with that science thing with the upper respiratory system."
"Are you okay, darling?" Rarity asked her, concerned.
"It's just my sickness," Pinkie said with a smile. "It's fine!"
The six all smiled nervously until the awkward silence was broken by Applejack.
"So, y'all," she said. "Why don't we get partyin'?"
They all nodded and went into the crowd, where they began to dance and sing to the songs played over the record player. Pinkie did not dance however, for her lungs would not allow it. As soon as the final song stopped, Pinkie went in front of the crowd and raised her hoof. Everypony stopped chatting and laughing as she did this, allowing her to speak.
"Firstly," she said, putting her hoof down. "Thank you all for coming to my party. Secondly, I have something to tell you all.
"I'm sure most of you have heard that I am dying, and for those who have not, I am dying. Now, when I learned about this, I locked myself up in my room here at Sugarcube Corner and refused to come out. However, thanks to a certain pegasus, I decided to come out and throw this party for you! Now, it may be my last party, it may be the first of my last. It may even be the last of my first of my last! But, this would not be happening without Ditzy Doo, who talked to me when I needed it most and told me that I am a great mare, and that at least one pony will be happy that I was alive! Ditzy, come to the front!"
There were a few gasps and annoyed grunts as the clumsy pegasus stuttered up to Pinkie. She burst forward and ran straight into Pinkie.
"Whoops," she said. "My bad."
"Ditzy made me feel happy again!" Pinkie yelled. "She made me understand who I really was, and she also told me a bit about herself! She knows that some of you talk about her in bad ways, and she knows that some of you don't like her, but she also knows that in the end, there will still be ponies who love her for who she is, and that is what matters."
Pinkie's voice became hoarse at the end, and her breath came in short gasps.
"She is- she is-"
Black spots began to dance across her vision as she stumbled around, trying to stay awake long enough to finish her sentence.
"She is a gr- great mare wh- who deserves to be loved!"
Pinkie fell down unconscious, unable to draw enough breath to function. Ponies everywhere screamed and cried as they ran forward to help her. There was something special about Pinkie's body, however.
She was smiling, eternal happiness covering her face.
Epilogue: No Other Like Her
Maybe there would be another like her. Maybe not.
All the five could think was that they had lost a part of themselves, but not as individuals: as a collective whole. They had all cried. Even Rainbow Dash had cried, looking at the casket as it went in, promptly covered in dirt.
All it did was prove that there was no other like her. Nopony in the wide, wide world could match the pink pony in any way. She was her own, and no one could stand against her.
As they sat on the library balcony, looking into the sun, that was all they could think. How irreplaceable that one friend is.
"Do you think they'll find a new bearer of the Element?" Rainbow Dash asked, her mane fluttering in the breeze. "Another laughter?"
"They might," Twilight replied, her eyes glued on the horizon.
"Nopony could ever do it like Pinkie Pie," Rarity commented.
They all shook their heads in silence. The temperature was dropping slowly, but it was only going to get mildly chilly.
"What do you think it's like?" Fluttershy asked timidly, and flinched when all eyes turned on her. "With Pinkie."
"Maybe she's with the alicorns in the Sky," Applejack said, pointing up, holding her hat in one hoof. "It's supposed to be ah nice place, I heard."
"I hope she is," Twilight said.
"One day we'll be with her, and we'll be happy too," Dash said, exhaling softly.
"Rather sage of you, Rainbow," Twilight teased, and the pegasus blushed and chuckled awkwardly.
"I don't like to think about death," the mare said. "I'm always right next to it when I do my stunts, always staring it down in a race I can never win. I want to think that when we do die, we end up happy, but I just don't know. There's so much pain here, so why should the Sky be any different?"
"Because the dead shouldn't want to cause pain for the other dead," Rarity replied, standing. "The Sky is a place for the dead, and the dead wouldn't want pain after life here."
"The animals talk about it too," Fluttershy muttered. "They think about death and where it goes. They think about the Forest, under the law of the Great Bear. They want happiness after death."
"I can understand why someone would want that," Dash said, her voice shaking softly. "But I just don't know."
Her breaths became deep and shuddering, and tears formed in her eyes.
"Why did she have to die?" she said, one rolling down her face. Her voice cracked. "She didn't deserve that, her of all ponies! She never did anything to deserve this!"
She stamped her hoof down, and the others jumped in surprise as the thud echoed in the evening quiet. The tears were pouring full out, harder and faster than they did at the funeral.
"I should have been me!" the pegasus yelled, sniffling. "I'm the worst of us, I'm the one with the ego and the hero complex and the selfishness and the worst–"
"Dash!" Twilight said, hugging her. The unicorn's example was quickly followed by the others. "I wish nopony died, but yet somepony did. We knew that it was going to happen eventually, and there's nothing we can do about it. You are no more deserving to die than Pinkie was."
Rainbow thrashed out of their circle, crouching down on the ground. She couldn't control her shaking, and she quaked as her friends watched. The tears were dripping down onto the floor, forming a puddle.
"I want Pinkie back," she said, falling onto her side. "I want my best friend back."
Maybe there would be another one like her. But in the minds of the five, there would not.
Author's Note
I sort of want to make a sequel that has the new Element of Laughter and the problems and stuff. I think it'd be pretty cool to write. Sorry for taking so long. I wrote this because I was looking through my stuff and realized I still hadn't gotten anywhere on the epilogue.
Hope you enjoy it!
