PMC: Pony May Cry

Dante awoke without opening his eyes.  He could tell the sun was shining right on his face.  His head was already throbbing, and the last thing he needed was the blinding sunlight shooting through his window.  “I thought I kept those blinds closed damnit!” Dante tried reaching for them, but his arm wouldn’t connect.  That was weird, given that, hangover or no, he knew where his window was.  He also realized that what he was laying on didn’t feel like his bed.  He begrudgingly felt that the additional pain opening his eyes would cause was worth finding out where the fuck he was.

Dante was in a field, apparently.  He was under a tree, but the sun was too low for the leaves to shade him.  “There aren’t any places like this around...the hell am I?”  Dante stood up, and tried to take in a good view of his surroundings: they were colorful.  They were extremely colorful; too colorful.  Now he understood; he clearly wasn’t in the real world anymore.  “Shit!  Back in Limbo.”

Dante never thought in his life that he could ever think this, but wherever he was looked extremely weird, even for limbo.  It was normally such a chaotic, bloodthirsty place; the world itself would normally be angry with him, and actively seek his death.  This place was just the opposite.  It was friendly and inviting.  This worried him to a degree, but he was no detective, and wasn’t going to stop to try to figure it out.  He still knew the way to escape: find whatever brought you in here, and destroy it.  His sword phased in on his back, as it does when he needs it, and he started walking toward a village he saw in the distance; it was as good of a place to start his search as any.

“Ah-ah-ah-ahh-aaahhhhh!”

A choir of birds echoed the pony’s soft singing.  Other critters of various sizes sat around them, enjoying the performance, it seemed.  Dante was fully caught off guard by this scene.  He could only stop and watch the least violent thing he had ever seen in Limbo.

“Ah-ah-ah-ahh-“ The pony stopped its singing short when it noticed Dante watching, “…oh…um…I’m sorry…I didn’t know anypony else was here…I’ll stop if it’s disturbing you.”

“What the fuck is this?”

“What?  I don’t understand what you-“

The pony was interrupted as Dante dashed toward her, bowling over some of the critters, and grabbed her by the hoof, lifting her in the air.  His other hand grabbed the sword off his back an held it to her throat.  The critters made a variety of noises in protest.

“WHY AM I HERE DEMON?  WHY IS NOTHING EVEN TRYING TO KILL ME?  WHERE IS THE THING THAT BROUGHT ME HERE?  WHY IS THE GROUND NOT OPENING UP UNDER ME?  WHERE IS THE TEXT ON THE FLOOR TELLING ME TO GO FUCK MYSELF?  ANSWER ME DEMON!”

The pony gave no response, other than a shriek, and fell unconscious in Dante’s hand.  Rabbits and foxes began nibbling futilely at his ankles.  Dante finally tossed the limp pony to his side.  “The hell, man…”  The critters attended to their friend, ignoring Dante as he walked away.  He replaced his sword on his back, and headed toward the village again, angry at what he perceived as his wasted time.