Dr. Sauce's Equestrian adventures

"Nien, nien, NIEN!"

It was absolute chaos, wrenches, construction PDAs and scrap metal were all flung in what seemed to be a massive tantrum, the speaker had a strange mix of both British and German to his accent. An Engineer watched, lightly lifting up his helmet and scratching his head in confusion as a festive Übersaw flew past and embedded itself in the solid concrete wall.

"Vhere is it, VHERE IS IT?!" said the man again, this time pulling himself out from underneath a workbench. Of the curious items he wore, his golden nine-pipe problem had plumes of smoke rising from it, his golden Ushanka lopsided as he frowned. Again, all the Engineer could do was sit there and look confused as he said "Where's what, doc?"

To this question, the man quickly turned around and glared at the Texan with a deathly look, "Mien Red-Prints, Mr. Conagher, My RED-PRINTS!" Without so much as a single seconds pause, the Engineer laughed and said "Your Red-Prints are in storage, doc, I'd be more than willing to get 'em for ya!" smiling lightly as he finished the sentence.

At that moment, the man smiled, then said "Oh und please, call me Doctor Sauce, heavens to Betsey, zere are so many men who forget my name." Mr. Conagher nodded, ripping the Übersaw from the nearby wall and giving it back to the doctor, making his way down to storage.

Whilst the Medic was made to wait, his vast impatience and general hyperactivity told him otherwise. "I must build something, ANYTHING!" he said, defaulting to a British accent as he lightly twirled back toward the workbench. By using his 'Scientific skill' he had managed to duct tape all four medi-guns together and get them working off of one lever, the unfortunate part was that it looked more like a Frankenstein experiment than a helpful one.

Pulling back on the lever, the four red beams combined into one rather large and bulky beam, the Quick-fix, the Kritzkrieg, the Vaccinator and the stock medi-guns effects were all combining into one giant swirling cloud of red mist. Dr. Sauce leased a small giggle, which slowly turned into a laugh and then finally a mad laugh, he was quite simply a madman.

Looking to his left, he saw a large tattered tarp which looked to be covering something. Curiously, he reached out a latex gloved hand, grasping the tarp firmly and almost snatching it away from the covered object. What was sitting underneath was an old invention of his, a 'U' shaped golden gate, with Tesla coils at the top almost forming the German letter 'Ü'.

He smiled slightly, then walked toward the gate and placed a hand against it. "Der Über tor" he whispered, awestruck by his device. At that point, the Engi had made his way back up from storage, hauling a box filled with rolls of red paper. "Here's your order, doc," he said with a humble smile, Sauce looked to him and said "Danke, mien hard hatted friend."
Casually, the Engi looked at the device, then said "Wut?"

Sauce followed the Engineer's eyes, looking at the device himself, "It's a gateway to other dimensions, times and places, it works off of your teleporter technology, but requires no exit, either co-ordinates, a time or a code." At this statement, the Engi raised an eyebrow, he then asked "So you're sayin' this thing right here could take you anywhere, any-when, doc?"

"Yes, that is exactly what it can do, my friend," he said "However, I'm not sure if it will work correctly, we need a diamond for some kind of refractive capabilities." Again, the Engi scratched his head and said "I major in Physics doc, yet even I don't get that."

"Well, it's like this, I will be taken apart at an atomic level, or much rather, a microscopic level. Then, the pieces of me will be energised into light, where I will be shot through a diamond, refracted into mirrors and then refocused by a magnifying glass. This will double my speed, meaning that I am travelling at twice the speed of light, therefore I can reach other universes in less than a blink of the eye. I will then de-energise, be reassembled at the desired location or as close to it as possible, bob's your uncle, fanny's your aunt, very simple stuff."

As he finished his sentence, Sauce looked to the Engi, the Engi looked back to Sauce, the Engi then said "Wut?" again, to which Sauce face-palmed and sighed. "Never mind, dummkopf," he said exasperatedly, holding back a much worse curse to give to Dell Conagher.

Despite it all, Sauce got on with looking through the Red-Prints, Dell casually looked at his Diamond Bot-killer wrench, lightly jiggling the robo-heavy's head around. Sauce turned around when he heard the sound of jingling metal to see the diamond robot head. "Zats IT!" he cried to the Engi, "You've got a diamond!" he exclaimed excitedly looking to Dell. "I can't do that for ya' doc, this is my only one," he said, looking like he was determined not to relinquish the decoration to his tool.

"Your diamond or your life, your decision, ten seconds to make it," said Sauce to Dell, this panicked him as he quickly said "Uh... Mah diamond!" throwing his wrench at Sauce. Dell knew Sauce never bluffed, he had to replace his Engineer at least once every year.

Doctor Sauce strolled over to the machine, ripping the diamond from its iron clasp with excitement. Dell winced at the sound of metal scraping against itself as it gave in to the force of the pull, knowing full well that if the link had been any stronger, the doctor would have probably hurt himself.

Opening a hatch, the doctor looked at the innards of the machine, lightly inserting the diamond into the slot, he turned it on by pulling a rather large lever. "You could'a' done that much easier, doc," said Dell, he smiled and replied "Sure, but I like the big lever, it makes EVERYTHING dramatic, just like the big Red button!"

Without so much as a sputter, the machine roared valiantly to life, Sauce stood infront of it, smiled slightly and waved as he typed something random into the keyboard.

"Hopefully, we will see each other again, Dell," he said with a smile, turning around to look at the portal. "What if we don't see each other again?" he asked, "Well, then you might have to find a replacement Medic!"

Without further ado, Sauce jumped willingly through the portal, curious to see what laid upon the other side. When he did, the entire machine exploded, just as it had finished its task of sending him off into the cosmos.

I wonder, what adventures await Sauce?...