Exie meats Neck Beard

by Fiddlesworth the bear

Rating: mature
Tags: Romance, Comedy, Tragedy, Dark, Human
Length: 1098

oh god the bloody nastalgia!

Exie the wonderful beautiful mare is out to meat her perfect match, and all she finds is the great and powerful Neck Beard

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-07-15 06:57:03 UTC

prepare 4 da luv making

It was a hawt summer's day and luv was in the air. Exie fresh out of highschool was extremely moist and sweaty and needed a way to cool off. so what other way to cool off then to go on an adventure. she was going down dark stairwell when out of an alley way she found a fat neck beard who was barely able to fit in it. Neck Beard's original intent was to get an unknowing horse by suprise since  he hates horses. but instead he immidiatly fell in luv with this particular horse! Instead of attacking with his immense body fat and pubes he just introduced himself awkwardly. "hi mine names Neck Beard, wanna have a cuddle struggle!?" Neck beard asked. Exie, immediately caught on by Neck Beard's cold looking flab sweat. SO Exie did the logical thing and jumped in, the sweat was at such a perfect temperature it fealt like a dream. Neck Beard jsut sat there happ[ily watching her with a large perverted intent as she swam around. Soon they both realised something was terribly wrong. The large sound of clippity clops came roaring through the alley way and suddenly the mane 5 and 1/2 horses came stomping throught. Neck Beard survived due to his large ammounts of fat hes gained over time but unfortunately Exie did not make it. She drowned and suffocated in Neck Beard's fat and sweat. But her soul lived on in Neck Beard's flab forever and ever. and this gave Neck Beard hope taht one day he shall defeat the horses and get his vengence for Exie.

credits

many thanks to "imjustanotherbrony" for making such an amazing OC and providing me with great material for a new and exciting story. i also thank the academy and my great mind for cumming up with such a detailed plot and a great charecter as Neck Beard i hope to rite moar stories about Neck BEard and maybe Exie if i relly give enough fucks to write more about her and amybe if i win some phat loot ill write more about her idk yet im lazy and its late and shit. I ALSO THANK THE GREAT AND POWERFUL BANE BLADE FOR MAKING THIS ALL HAPPEN. i lso thank shrek for being my true inspiration for everything and anything and i thank him for being there all these years. which reminds me, i really hat ehow dreamworks ahsnt made a shrek 5! i mean sure shrek 3 sure as hell wasnt taht good but taht doesnt mean that they couldnt just go and make a 5th one for profit and fillers. It would absolutely make my dreams come true if they jsut went and made more shrek material. you know what! i think ill just go and make my own shrek movie, yeah that'll show em. and it will be ten times better than all the other shreks. ill even make so many that it will turn into a TV series, except it wont end up like shitty kung fu panda's mini series ittl actually be good, and then maybe ill get some kind of reward or something and then ill make more charecters and movies about side charecters from the shrek series and ill become a millionare in no time. oh shit i jsut realized the majority of this amazing sotory isnt even about trixie and im probobly gonna lose this damn competition. all i want is some freaken steam credits or some free art. oh damn it i even forgot to spell exie i accidently spelled "trixie" well whatever im too lazy to go back and fix my mistakes so that'll have to do, damn i speant a whole 25 minutes on this shitty story, thats more time than my other 2 stories which couldnt be published because they were too good for this website! anyway its like 3 am and i have no idea when i should go to sleep first i was palying dark souls then suddenly i find myself here jsut trying to write fillers because i dont care how many words it is as long as it is at least one thousand woprds i wouldnt even usually spell out one thousand just this time i want it to be more words. god what should i talk about now? OH I KNOW. i think im gonna have an egg omelet with ham and cheese for breakfast, i kinda wanna make it now but people are alseep and im naturally loud so that would mean waking up the house. and if i wake up the house that means my house is alive which isnt a good thing. i wonder what my cat is doing right now...probobly dreaming about cat stuff like fish or maybe how much he loves or hates me or something. oh god i just realised in an hour and 30 minutes my father is gonna wake up to go to work and wonder why the fuck im awake and i wont have a valid excuse then im gonna oversleep into tommorow and waste another day of my life as always

null

i actually feel like that last pic took a LOT of time and dedication because all i really see is shrek but anyway im not even tired right now but ill probobly jsut go lay down and stare at a wall for awhile till my brain gets stumped. ha i jsut realized im actually getting kinda drowsy writing this so ill prob go to sleep after submitting this crap and all that jazz god is this over yet?

all all all all all all all all all all all i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i  i i i i i i i i ii i i i i i i i i i  need need need need need need need neeed need need need need is is is is is is  i sisisisi isi is is is is is is is is is is is is  like like like like like likel ikel ikel like like ike 60 60 60 60 60 60 more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more words words words thne thne thne then then im im im im im im im im im im im im im im im im im im im im  donme wiht this crap!

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