Prologue
Pinkie shot off the party cannon in her room, causing all sorts of streamers, confetti, and sparkles to cover her floor and furniture. She looked around and smiled thinking to herself; the best way to cheer yourself up is to make the place you spend the most time look happy. Pinkie had been forced to stay in bed for a few months due to her past…accident. Luckily today was going to be the first day in weeks that she was able to go out and enjoy the world again.
Pinkie thought of how wonderful it was, but there was still the nagging feeling of the past in the back of her head. The bandage on her hoof left a reminder of it every time she looked at it.
Pinkie had become depressed because she thought all of her friends were avoiding her and the party for Pinkie’s pet alligator: Gummy. Pinkie had never felt real depression before. She was always smiling and laughing, heck her element of harmony was laughter, but there were always friends to laugh with her.
Yet today she never so felt alone in the world, sure she knew everypony in Ponyville, but how many ponies actually understood her? The way best friends understand each other. Like the way RainbowDash, or AppleJack or even Rarity knew her; there wasn’t. This thought drove Pinkie Pie over the edge. Her purpose in life was to make people laugh and throw parties, but if she didn’t have any friends to invite, real friends. Then…there was no purpose in her life. Pinkies chest throbbed with pain, her heart had been broken.
Spike’s words rang in her ears, “They don’t like your parties and don’t wanna be your friend anymore!” The pain was too much and only one solution came to her mind. The idea seemed relieving in a way, but if she was going to end it all then she had to do it where her former friends could see, and know it was their fault. Pinkie knew that all of her ex-friends were in AppleJack’s barn; avoiding her.
She played the moment over in her mind, Pinkie would swing open the barn door, exposing all of her liar friends, taking a split second to look each one in the eye as they’d all be surprised, and then without a word, she’d take the knife from the Cake’s kitchen and slice open her hooves.
She hoped her blood would stain the ground where she’d fall. She hoped that if she sliced hard enough that her blood would reach far enough and splatter all over their faces and serve as a reminder of how they treated her. In a twisted sense, Pinkie started to feel a little excited and almost happy, but it wasn’t her usual kind of happy.
This kind of happiness was bitter and it wasn’t long before Pinkie was crying on her way over to the barn. The thought finally processes that she was going to die, and there was nothing she could do to prevent it. This is what it’s like when people ran out of purpose; death was all that was left. There was no hope, there was no happiness, and there was no laughter. Pinkie could see the shed now, and a sense of fear swelled up in her throat. She cried even harder, but when she wiped away her tears she was standing in front of the barn door.
Pinkie sniffed hard so the mucus that threaten to drip onto her snout stayed in her nose. This was it she thought. She was going to open the barn door and do it. Pinkie gripped the knife handle preparing herself, but before she could reach over and open the barn door she heard RainbowDash on the other side of the door.
“Yeah hang on I’ll go get her!” Pinkie panicked and closed her eyes. The door she opened and Pinkie drove the blade across her hoof, immediately feeling the warm rush of blood start pouring out from the cut. It took a moment for RainbowDash to register what she had just seen, but quickly Dash rushed over and caught Pinkie Pie as she was falling to the ground. “Pinkie Pie, my Celestia what have you done! Help! Twilight, AppleJack guys get over here!” Pinkie opened her eyes and saw RainbowDash’s mortified look.
Pinkie felt proud, she had gotten the reaction she was looking for, but when her eyes focused behind RainbowDash the feeling of pride washed away like the blood leaving her veins.
Pinkie saw a banner in the barn that said “Happy Birthday Pinkie Pie.” Pinkie had forgotten today was her birthday, she had been so focused on the fact that no one would attend her party that she didn’t think the others were making a party for her. Pinkie heard Twilight coming from the barn.
“Oh my Celestia! RainbowDash what happened?”
“I don’t know I came out and Pinkie slit her hooves, Twilight she’s loosing a lot of blood you have to do something!”
“I don’t have any spells for this! We need to get her to the hospital quick!”
“I’ll go!” RainbowDash exclaimed as she picked up Pinkie in her arms and blasted off as fast as she could.
Over the rushing wind Pinkie heard RainbowDash sobbing. Then RainbowDash muttered, “Pinkie why?” Pinkie was loosing energy to stay awake, but she managed to mutter back, “I thought you didn’t like my parties anymore… I thought you didn’t… want to be my friends.” RainbowDash cried even harder. “Oh Pinkie, we would never do that to you. We love you.” Tears began to stream down Pinkies face even harder. “I…love you…too.” Pinkie could hold on any longer she passed out of consciousness, but before she did, she could have sworn she had heard a sonic rainboom.
Pinkie shook her head as she was starring at her bandaged hoof. Pinkie began putting her cannon away in her closet smiling at the thought of her friends throwing her a make-up birthday party today. She truly had the best friends in the world to go through all the trouble again to throw her a birthday party. Pinkie heard hooves behind her and turned around expecting Rainbow Dash to be standing there to take her to the party, but when she spun around there was no pony there.
Pinkie must have heard it from down stairs. She walked over to the door and opened it and listen to the house for a moment, but the only thing she heard was the drowned out noise of the bakery.
Then from inside her room Pinkie heard light laughter. It sounded like a young filly, so Pinkie Pie assumed maybe it was one of the Cutie Mark Crusaders playing games with her. Pinkie laughed also, “Okay who’s playing tricks on me? Is this gong to be a birthday surprise?” Pinkie waited a moment to hear a response or other noise, but something felt weird.
There was no pony else in the room beside herself, and the only place to hide was in her closet, but still…Pinkie felt like she was being watched. It was that unmistakable sixth sense going off in her head. Pinkie decided she’d have to check the closet to be sure. She slowly and quietly tip toed over to grab the door handle. Pinkie took a deep breath tensed up and flung the door open. However the only thing in the closet was the cannon she put back earlier.
Again she heard the little fillies laughter behind her and now Pinkie was beginning to get scared. “Okay if there is someone playing a joke on me, the jokes over come on out.” Pinkie waited in silence for an answer, but what she received was another echoing laughter, that seemed to be all around her now. “Ha ha ha!”
“ Hel- Hello?” Pinkie Pie again waited for an answer.
“Poor Pinkie Pie, doesn’t even know who I am.” The voice sounded as if it was coming from the ceiling and laughter followed this response, but now it sounded like it was mocking her. “Who- who are you?” Pinkie was now completely frightened her hooves were shaking and she felt surrounded. “No I think the more appropriate question would be, who am I? Pinkie” said the voice.
“That’s what I asked!” Pinkie exclaimed now frustrated with the voice. However the voice only laughed and teased, “No you asked ME who I am, the question should be directed toward yourself Ms. Pinkie PIE!” Pinkie Pie had spun around so that she now caught herself facing her mirror next to her bed. The mirror entranced Pinkie, because something seemed different. From far away Pinkie couldn’t tell exactly, but something was different about the mirror.
She walked over to the mirror as she got closer she started to notice the differences between herself and the reflection. The Pinkie in the reflection had straight long hair, but Pinkie’s mane was naturally curly and poofy. The other pony had eyes that pierced right through Pinkie; they were cold and mean.
Finally as Pinkie was right in front of the mirror she noticed her reflection was a darker shade of Pink, as if her coat had been tainted with black. Pinkie could not take her eyes off herself in the reflection; it was like some kind of trick.
Just then she saw her reflection say “Hello!” Pinkie freaked out, falling backwards sliding all the way to the other side of the room till the wall would not permit her too move away any further. Pinkie’s eyes could not believe what she was seeing, almost something out a movie; her reflection came out of the mirror stepping over the threshold and into her room.
“Wha-! How-!” Pinkie could not form words, her head could not process anything that was happening before her. The reflection never took her eyes off of Pinkie as she walked across the room and put her face right in front of Pinkie’s. “Who- Who are you!” Pinkie managed to mutter. The reflection rolled her eyes and scoffed. “You never listen do you! Just keep asking the same question and maybe you’ll get the right answer.
Fine if you don’t want to listen I’ll humor you. My name is Pinkamena Diane Pie.” Pinkie Pie’s thoughts fluttered even more widely than before. “No- no tha- that’s my name” Pinkie said studdering. “Oh, Is it? Well that’s sure is strange. I guess we’re both Pinkamena Pie.” The oher pony walked away from Pinkie kicking the floor covered in glitter and confetti. “My- my friends call me Pinkie Pie.”
“Oh yes, your friends,” this caused the reflection pony to stop and face Pinkie again. “Tell me something Pinkie Pie how can you still call those liars your friends?”
“I- I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Pinkie now managed to stand up on all fours, but she still had her back against the wall and watched as the other Pinkie Pie paced back and fort. “It’s a very simple question, why do you still call those ponies like Rainbow Dash or Twilight your friends?”
“Well- I mean, because they are. How else do you explain that?” The reflection paused for a second and pierced Pinkie again with her eyes. “Oh really? Can you prove that they are your friends?”
“Of course I can, they’ve done all sorts of stuff for me.”
“Like what?”
“Well the girls always like to hang out with me, and whenever I need some pony they’re there for me.” The reflection laughed at Pinkie’s response. “Like when I cut myself Rainbow Dash did everything she could to save me.” The other Pinkie chuckled again as she turned away from her. Her laughter hurt, it was one of the few times when some pony was laughing at her not with her.
“Oh that proves your friendship alright! Rushing you to the hospital just so they wouldn’t be blamed with your death. Yeah that’s real friendship right there.”
“Wait, what?”
“Please, do you think Rainbow Dash would stick her neck out for any pony?”
“Well, yeah I mean she didn’t want to lose me”
“She didn’t want to be blamed for a dead pony!”
“You’re wrong! Rainbow Dash is a loyal friend, her element of harmony proves that!” However Pinkie’s convincing did no good to the other pony. She simply giggled at Pinkie Pie more, which struck needles in her heart.
“Loyal to herself maybe. She was the first pony to see you dying, so naturally she’d be blamed for it, and she’d do anything to not get in trouble.” Pinkie had a hard time processing what that other pony was saying. There would be no way Rainbow Dash would be that self-centered. “No, she did it because she is my friend, and she loves me!”
“I’ll give you a little credit, there may have been a time where she might have been loyal friend, but it was never to you. Why else would she go through such trouble to avoid you on your birthday!”
“Because she was helping set up my surprise birthday party!” Again the pony burst out in her bittersweet almost hysterical laughter.
“You actually believe they were throwing you a surprise party! You can actually be kind of cute”
“I saw it with my own eyes!” Pinkie Pie was becoming annoyed now at this imposter.
“You know there’s something called going into shock! It happens when you lose a lot of blood, and trust me that day you were loosing a tremendous amount of blood. Hallucinations are quite common.”
“No…be quite.”
“You wanted to believe so bad that your friends hadn’t abandoned you.”
“Please stop talking.” Pinkie Pie covered her ears, but it was no use, the reflection was as clear as day.
“Poor little Pinkie Pie just wanted some friends,” the other pony mocked her. “Face it you’re just a little annoyance to them. You don’t have any REAL friends, they keep you around so if they need to use the elements of harmony they can, that’s all you mean to them!”
By this point Pinkie was curled up into the feeble position trying to escape her counterpart’s words, but for some reason she could not stop hearing her.
“Pinkie please stop!” However as soon as she said this, the reflection pony appeared right in her face with the most malicious look she could imagine. “Don’t you dare call me Pinkie!
I would sooner die then be associated with a friendless loser like you. My name is Pinkamena, that’s something you’ve seemed to abandon.” Pinkamena pulled her face back from Pinkie’s, but not letting her gaze down. “It’s so sad, even after all this, I know there’s nothing else you’d like more than to be convinced that those ponies are still your friends.”
Pinkie was sobbing quietly now, trying hard to make sure Pinkamena didn’t hear, but she knew it was no use. That other Pinkie Pie knew everything about her. She knew what she feared the most, and even when Pinkie had pushed all her fears to the back of her mind, that other pony pulled them right back out. Pinkie tried to think of how this other her was here in the first place. That mirror must lead into a parallel world, or dark world or something! Pinkie Pie sniffled a bit, then asked.
“We’ll if I want friends, then you must want friends too!” Pinkamena laughed cynically at Pinkie Pie, “Aw you think you’re being clever. That’s cute, honestly that’s adorable, but no Pinkie Pie I do not want friends, I don’t need friends like you do.” Pinkamena walked over to Pinkie Pie and touched her face.
“My existence isn’t sustained by the presents of others.” Her hoof then began to trace around Pinkie’s face and rub through her hair. “Most fillies are lucky, they are born into a family where they never have to feel alone, where they are constantly reminded that they are apart of a whole, but we are not like most fillies.
In our family we were reminded we were alone. Sure we were around our mother and father and sisters, but being in each other presence and being together are two different things. They were never really there, as we were never really there. We were in our graves, because that’s where we were born. Our mother, father and sisters had no delusions about that, but you… you refused to believe that our destinies were already sealed.
You chose to believe that we could be different from what the great forces of Equestria had decided.” Finally Pinkie Pie had to interrupt. “I didn’t decide anything! Destiny decided my cutie mark and I followed!”
Pinkamena stopped and looked at Pinkie with a pleased look. It disturbed Pinkie sending shivers down her spine. “Did you really follow it? I’d look again.” Pinkie quickly looked at her cutie mark, but instead of seeing the little balloons she was so use to, she instead saw pictures rocks in their place.
“Wait what!” Pinkie stumbled back and fell as she continued to look at her thigh in shock. ‘That couldn’t be she thought, her cutie mark were always little balloons, because she loved parties, this didn’t make any sense! “That’s impossible.”
“Is it? Or could it be that you just tricked yourself into thinking this whole time that you’d defy your real destiny for some fake made up destiny?”
“No, no this can’t be true this just can’t be.”
“See what I mean! You constantly try to challenge your fate and the facts that stare you right in the face! Well I won’t let you go on doing it, I won’t!” Pinkamena now pulled Pinkie’s face close to hers staring into her eyes. Pinkie closed her eyes, but Pinkamena shook her. “You will not close your eyes to the truth again!” Pinkie Pie started to cry again, but she opened her eyes and suffered through the pain of having her soul looked into by her evil double. “There is only one way to get back to your real destiny, and you know exactly what that is.”
“Why are you doing this?”
“Because I’m reality coming back to smack you in the face! Reality always kicks in to the delusional. Now tell me if we go back to our original destinies where do we go?”
“You have to be some sort of fake!”
“Tell me if we go back to our original destinies where do we go! What did I tell you before”!
“I have to make this stop some how.”
“Where do we go”!
“To the grave!” Pinkie Pie finally yelled out.
There was a long pause after Pinkie said this. She had shut her eyes again, and Pinkamena let go of her head. Pinkie sat there in silence now feeling the throbbing pain in her chest. This was the same pain she felt on the day that she wanted tried to kill herself. Pinkie thought maybe her other half was right.
She couldn’t live with the pain of being a lie. Pinkie had always validated herself by the presence of other people; they helped keep her lie alive, and kept her from the ultimate truth. Pinkamena picked up Pinkies hoof and put a hard piece of plastic in it. Pinkie Pie opened her eyes and saw that it was the handle of a knife.
Pinkie looked shocked and looked up at Pinkamena in disbelieve. “Please no there-there must be something else I can do.”
“There isn’t.” She said coldly.
“Please I can’t do it, not again.”
“You can.” Pinkie Pie stared at the sharp medal that reflected the little bit of sunlight into her room. She remembers feeling this way, the emptiness and the inevitability of her demise. She also remembered the second of joy she had gotten when she had seen Rainbow Dash’s face, but this time. There was no one to spite, there was no lesson to teach her friends: nothing. She’d die alone, just like she had been born.
As Pinkie tilted the blade to put over her non-scared hoof, something at caught her eye and made her pause. From the hall there was the sound of a single pair of hooves and Rainbow Dash calling out “Pinkie Pie time to go!” Pinkie Pie forgot about the knife and looked at Pinkamena, who also looked at her shocked. “Well I might as well buy my self a little insurance.”
Pinkamena grabbed the knife out of her hoof and rushed over behind the door. As soon as it opened Pinkamena grabbed Rainbow Dash with one hoof and held the blade to her neck in the other. “NO Rainbow Dash!”
“Pinkie Pie what is going on-!“ was all Rainbow Dash could manage to get out before Pinkamena covered her mouth with her hoof holding her down. “Let her go she didn’t do anything to you!”
“Oh, but she did! If it wasn’t for her last time, our destiny would have been fulfilled, but because of her it was delayed! Let’s see you fly your way out of this one!”
“Please no I’ll do whatever you ask, just don’t hurt Rainbow Dash she has nothing to do with this!”
“I would disagree, she’s got everything to do with this! If it weren’t for these ponies being a distraction then everything would be fine! You still hold onto their friendship as if it meant something.
Well I’ll make sure there are no distractions and get rid of the problem just in case. What do you say Dashie? I’ll do you first, then I’ll get to all our other FRIENDS.” Rainbow Dash continued to struggle and glare at Pinkamena. “Rainbow Dash it’s going to be okay! Please don’t!” Pinkie Pie said weakly closing her eyes, fearing deep down that it would be pointless to plea. Pinkamena adjusted Rainbow Dash’s head so that she was looking in Pinkies direction. “Look at how she glare’s at you with cruel eyes. She never liked you and right now she hates you because of you’re weakness!”
Pinkamena pulled the blade back to slide it across Rainbow Dash’s throat, Rainbow Dash let out a muffled cry. Pinkie froze as she saw the blade glide back to end her friend’s life. Then a sudden realization came across Pinkie’s mind. Pinkamena drove the knife across Dash’s throat, but when she expected to hear her scream out in pain, it was instead Pinkie Pie who yelled and fell back releasing Rainbow Dash.
The knife was planted in Pinkie Pie’s shoulder, which she quickly pulled out and threw across the room. Pinkie sat up looking at Dash and holding her shoulder, which was now throbbing. “I’m sorry Dash, I’m so so so sorry,” Pinkie Pie breathed out.
“Pinkie Pie what the hell was that all about? Are you crazy?” Rainbow Dash said picking herself off the floor, “I know, I know, I know you’re right, it’s probably best that you don’t come near me anymore. You need to stay away because I am seriously crazy.”
“Hold on, I didn’t mean-.”
“I’m seriously messed up Rainbow Dash, the thought of being alone drives me insane, but maybe it’s because I’m not meant to have friends if you even call me that anymore.”
“Pinkie Pie!” Rainbow Dash embraced Pinkie on the floor and held her head in her chest. “It’s not your fault Pinkie.”
“But it is! It was my fault all of it!”
“I don’t care Pinkie! I’m your friend no matter what, I told you that I love you and nothing will ever change that. I’m sorry I said what I said. You can go as insane as you like, but you will never lose me as a friend even if you try to push me away, that’s what friends are for and I’ll fight for our friendship.” Both of the ponies were sobbing hard now neither allowing their grip on each other to loosen.
