Discord's Villain Reform Program

by shinigamisparda

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Twilight Sparkle, Discord, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Main 6, Princess Luna
Length: 15966

Discord's back in Ponyville after a long vacation. Caught between his desire for chaos and wanting to keep his few friends, can Discord sate his desire for mischief in a way that doesn't warrant punishment? Duh, look at the title.

After an Equestria-wide vacation Discord returns to Ponyville, with mixed reactions. During his stay he finds himself caught between his boredom and desire for chaos and not wanting to lose the few friends he has. Will Discord find a way to sate his desire for mayhem and still find a way to do good? What do you think? Just look at the title.
Inspired by HowXu on deviantart
Image provided by Tori-34 on deviantart

Published 2013-07-17 22:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-10-12 06:26:23 UTC

Back in Town

It was autumn in Ponyville, the time when the winds blew colder and the nights grew longer, and for nearly all of Equestria this used to put a bit of damper on everypony’s mood, and not only because the cold weather made it harder to be outside and daylight burned quickly. With Canterlot not too far away Ponyville had always had a special connection with the mighty and beloved Celestia, the alicorn Princess of the Sun and essentially Goddess of all ponydom. Because of her alignment with the bright ball of light in the sky, the ponies naturally favored the daytime due to its relation with their wise and benevolent Princess. However, in recent years the night had begun to become popular in Ponyville as well, especially with the foals, due to the rise in popularity of a certain “Princess of the Night.” This was the time of year that was the most active for Princess Luna, ironic considering its association with her formerly terrifying form, the holiday of Nightmare Night, a time for fear and fun. However, a different being that inspired true fear in the hearts of ponies everywhere was making a return this night…

--

“Yeah! This is the best Nightmare Night ever!”

“Little one, you said that last year as well.”

“’Cause it’s true! Thanks, Luna!”

Princess Luna blushed for a moment. She walked back towards Ponyville with the foals around her, young Pipsqueak the closest to her as they talked. They had just finished the candy offering of the night, where the children (and some of the adults) had offered their sweets to the statue of Nightmare Moon, with Luna’s scare closely following.

“I greatly appreciate your enthusiasm, Pipsqueak, and the support of all the other citizens of Ponyville.”

“So, what’re you going to do now?”

“Hm… Perhaps I will participate in the pumpkin-throwing contest this year. It is one of the few events I have yet to try,” she mused.

“Can I go with you?” the young colt asked with a sparkle in his eye.

“But of course!”

“Yes! I’m warning you, Princess, I won’t go easy on you!”

“I had hoped you wouldn’t, young-“

The princess was cut off by a loud crash from behind them causing all the ponies to hide behind Luna, who was obviously startled herself.

“Hahaha! I got you!”

Everypony looked up to see a rainbow haired mare in an evil racing outfit rolling in laughter upon her cloud.

“Rainbow Dash!” Luna scolded.

“No complaining, Princess! This is Nightmare Night after all, and you got me with the same trick before!”

“Actually, I was going to criticize your repetition.”

“Huh?”

“I hear you do the same trick every year. Perhaps you should try something new?” the Night Princess suggested smugly.

Oh, I agree completely.

“H-Huh?”

Everypony scanned the surrounding area, looking for the source of the echoing voice.

And more than that, it’s so cliché. A lighting bolt, that’s it? Let me show you a real jump-scare!

The sky suddenly darkened as clouds began to gather, blocking out the stars and moon. Thunder rumbled and lighting crackled, and without warning the clouds formed a massive demonic face that bore down upon them. Everypony screamed as the face laughed maniacally. Everypony, that is, except the alicorn princess.

“STAND BACK, MY SUBJECTS!” she bellowed in her traditional royal Canterlot voice as her eyes shined with power. Magical energy began to gather in her horn.

Wait, what’re you-? No, nonononono-!

“TASTE MY POWER, FIEND!”

A bolt of energy shot from the Princess’ horn which almost instantly struck the cloudy face. With a deafening boom and blinding flash the ominous clouds were scattered, and a singed body plummeted from the sky and collided with the ground with a graceless thud behind the trees of the Everfree Forest.

“COME OUT NOW, EVILDOER, AND YOU MAY YET BE SPARED THE FULL EXTENT OF MY WRATH!”

There was a moment of silence that was soon broken by a groan. The shuffling of brush indicated the being’s approach and within seconds the mismatched creature floated before them.

“Now was that really necessary?”

“Discord?!” Luna exclaimed, her shock causing her to drop her more intimidating display.

“Discord!” Rainbow Dash seethed.

“DISCORD!” The ponies screamed before running off in terror.

The draconequus simply watched as they scampered off for a few moments before chuckling.

“Heh, is that all it took? If I knew it’d be that easy to scare them I would’ve just snuck up behind them and said ‘hi’!”

“Just what’re you doing here, Discord?!” Rainbow Dash yelled at the master of disharmony.

“Why, I came to join in the festivities,” he said matter-of-factly with a smug look on his face. “There wasn’t a Nightmare Night before I was turned to stone the first time, and how could I pass up a holiday based around scaring the bejeesus out of everypony?”

“Don’t give me that! You’re up to something! I just know it!”

“I too find it difficult to believe that you are here for no other reason than harmless pranks,” Luna added. “Do not think your previous… ‘antics’ are so easily forgotten.”

“Oh, isn’t this rich,” Discord pouted. “You all force me to play by your rules and then you won’t even let me come to your parties because you can’t let go of a grudge!” He folded his arms indignantly. “Well, who needs you? I’ll just go and be with somepony who’ll appreciate my company. I don’t suppose you sticks-in-the-mud will tell me where Fluttershy is?”

The pegasus and the Princess stopped for a moment, surprised to see that despite the unease around him the “Mad God” really did seem to see the timid pony who defeated him with naught but kindness as friend.

“Well,” Rainbow Dash began, “if it’s anything like all the other Nightmare Nights…”

--

Discord gently knocked on the door.

“GO AWAY! NO CANDY HERE! VISITORS NOT WELCOME ON NIGHTMARE NIGHT!”

Discord stared at the door in shock for a moment before chuckling.

“Wow, and I thought she was loud when she scolded me before!”

“So, yeah, you’re not gonna be talking to Fluttershy anytime-“

“Shh!”

Discord pulled Raindow Dash and Luna into the bushes to hide.

“What exactly are you-?” Luna started.

“Shush!” Discord snapped back before snapping his fingers.

Before they could utter a word both of their mouths clamped shut. The two pulled at their jaws, Luna even attempting to use magic, but they couldn’t move their lips in the slightest. They failed to notice that Discord had floated back over to the door until it was too late.

Discord quietly cleared his throat. “Come on, Fluttershy, you can open the door for a friend, right?” He asked. The alicorn and the pegasus looked on in shock from what they heard. Not because of what he said, but rather how he said it. Or, rather, in whose voice he said it.

“Twilight? Is that you?” the timid pegasus asked. “When did you get back from Canterlot?”

As Fluttershy creaked open the door Discord floated just above her, out of plain sight. Confused, Fluttershy peeked her head out further to try and see where her friend was. The draconequus craned his neck down and leveled his mouth with her ear.

“Boo.”

The result was nearly instantaneous, as the pegasus let out a shriek before darting back inside and slamming the door. Luckily for his own neck, Discord had pulled away as she shrieked in terror and was now tumbling through the air in laughter.

“PRICELESS!” he managed to shout through his laughs.

Rainbow Dash had had enough. She darted over to Discord and gave him a piece of her mind, or at least she tried considering her mouth was clamped shut. After a moment of realizing just how difficult it was to speak she glared at Discord and pointed at her mouth. The draconequus simply smirked but, after a harsher death-glare, finally rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers, undoing the spell to both Rainbow and Luna.

“Discord, you jerk, what the hay do you think you’re doing!? I don’t care how much you two get along, there’s no way you’re gonna scare Fluttershy like that and-!”

“Discord?” a tiny yet noticeably surprised voice uttered, immediately cutting her off.

The meek pony cracked the door open to peek through, only to immediately throw it open and dash outside.

“Discord, you’re back!” she shouted as she flew forward and wrapped her forelegs around him. Both Rainbow and Luna were a bit taken aback by this.

“Well hello there,” Discord responded, wrapping one arm around her and giving her a friendly noogie with the other. “And just how’s my favorite pegasus doing?”

“Oh, well, um,” she stuttered as she let go, “Well, actually, I’ve been a bit scared all night, so, um, just ok, I guess?”

“’A bit!?’ You were practically a blur when you flew back inside after Discord scared the hay out of you!” Rainbow Dash butted in.

“Oh, hello Rainbow Dash! I didn’t see you th-“ Fluttershy began before seeing the dark blue alicorn behind her. “Oh no! I-I-I mean, ‘Oh! F-Forgive me, your majesty!’” she stammered as she bowed. “I d-didn’t see you there, Nightmare- I mean, Princess Luna!”

Luna sighed. “And greetings to you as well, Fluttershy, and once again I must insist that you have nothing to fear from me.”

“Seriously? You’re afraid of her and not him?” Rainbow Dash complained.

“I chalk it up to my natural charm and good looks,” Discord said with a positively smug look on his face.

“Oh yeah, scaring the one real friend you have the second you get back, real charming,” she retorted, laying the sarcasm on especially thick.

“Oh! That was you, Discord?” Fluttershy asked. “But I thought I heard Twilight.”

“Fluttershy, you’re forgetting who I am. I can warp the entire world any way I want, do you really think that changing my voice would be difficult?” he explained with a prideful smirk.

“Oh, well, I guess that does sound easy by comparison. So, how was your vacation?”

“Oh, it was wonderful! Let’s go inside, I’ll tell you all about it!” he answered wrapping one arm around her as he lead her back into her house.

The door closed itself behind them, leaving a rather startled Rainbow and Luna outside.

“I can’t believe this!” the pegasus shouted. “He just comes back after disappearing without telling anypony and she completely forgets he just scared the wings off her!”

“Gather the other members of the Elements of Harmony, Rainbow Dash,” the Princess ordered.

“Huh? What for? It’s not like we can turn him back stone since Fluttershy won’t use it against him.”

“I know, and I also do not wish to go against the wishes of my sister. However, I still believe you all should be ready to oversee him and stop him should he step out of line. After what we’ve experienced tonight I think we can say that even with his ‘reformation’ old habits die hard.”

“Gotcha. But, what’re you gonna do?”

“I will first head to Ponyville and inform the citizens of Discord’s return, as well as attempt to ease their fears. Then I will head back to Canterlot to do the same, as well as inform my sister and Twilight Sparkle. I’m sure our newest Princess will wish to return to Ponyville immediately upon hearing of Discord’s return.” Luna gathered magic in her horn before firing it skyward. After traveling some distance it exploded like a firework in the shape of a crescent moon. Within moments Luna’s chariot, pulled by her bat-winged stallions, came into view. “I am sorry to ask this of you on a holiday night such as this, but-“

“Don’t sweat it, Princess, I would’ve done this myself if you hadn’t told me.”

Luna smiled and nodded before flying up to her chariot. “You may go ahead, Rainbow Dash. I place my faith in your great speed.”

Rainbow smirked and perked up at that. “Don’t you worry, Princess, I’ll get everyone here in a snap!”

And with that the cyan pegasus streaked off across the night sky as the lunar princess and her escorts flew at their own pace.

--

“Wow! So it sounds like you really had a great time!” Fluttershy commented, handing her guest some hot chocolate. “I was worried when you ran off and only left a note.”

“Worried? About me? Oh Fluttershy, I think you worry far too much for your own good,” Discord replied while taking the mug offered to him.

“Well, it’s just that it wasn’t long after you promised to be good that you left, and I was afraid you might go back to your old ways without me around.”

“Fluttershy, I thought you had more faith in me than that,” Discord complained with a sad puppy-dog look on his face.

“Oh no, that’s not what meant! I mean, well, yes I was afraid you might make some chaos, but I was also worried about what Celestia might tell us to do if you went back on your word.”

Discord looked surprised for a moment before a warm smile stretched across his face. “Fluttershy, you continue to surprise me,” he said while gently rubbing her head. “You really are the best friend a draconequus could have,” he said before taking a quick sip of his hot chocolate. “Unlike those other ponies,” he muttered.

“Discord!”

“I’m sorry, but I’m still a bit cross. I pull one little prank and everypony and their grandmare jumps on me! It’s Nightmare Night, I’m supposed to scare everypony!”

“Discord,” Fluttershy started in a tone that belied her usually shy demeanor. “Was it really just a little prank?”

Discord shifted his eyes for a moment before confessing. “Ok, so maybe it was a big prank, but it wasn’t like I was putting anypony in danger! I mean seriously, how do I get flak when all I did was move around some clouds and that pegasus doesn’t get anything more than a slap on the hooves when she uses lighting?!”

“Oh, don’t you dare try and shift this to me!” a familiar voice complained before bursting through the door.

“Rainbow Dash?” Fluttershy asked, surprised.

“Couldn’t you knock?” Discord complained without missing a beat.

“Unfortunately he’s right Rainbow dear, you should really be a bit more focused on your manners,” a familiarly elegant sounding voice stated.

“Is now really tha’ time for that?” said another voice.

A unicorn and an earth pony followed in soon after the cyan pegasus, the former dressed as an elegant vampire and the latter as a zombie farmer, complete with Stetson hat.

“Seriously, do you ever take that hat off?” Discord asked.

“What’s it to ya, anyway?” Applejack retorted.

“Nothing really, I just wanted to see how easy it would be to get you upset,” the draconequus stated smugly before taking another sip of his hot chocolate.

“Why you little varmit!”

“Discord!” Fluttershy scolded.

“Oh come on, its too easy! She’s practically begging for it!”

“Fluttershy, how can you stand him?!” Rainbow Dash shouted.

“But you aren’t even giving him a chance!” Fluttershy complained. “He’s improved so much! See, he’s not even taking Angel Bunny’s spot on the couch!” she said while pointing to the fact he was sitting in mid-air, and also how Angel Bunny himself was clinging to his seat cushion.

“Oh don’t even bother, Fluttershy. The three of them are just jealous that they don’t have someone as awesome and handsome as me going out of their way to hang out with them.”

“As if, you-! Wait, ‘three?’” Rainbow began, only to cut herself off. She looked back to Applejack and Rarity confused.

“What’s wrong, sugarcube?” Applejack asked.

“Where’s Pinkie Pie?”

“She’s probably on her way,” Rarity suggested.

“But, I found her before I got to any of you and I told her to-“

Rainbow Dash was interrupted by a speeding pink blur that pushed Rarity and Applejack aside. After everypony took a moment to gain their bearings they saw the pink mare dressed as a rubber ducky with her hooves planted on Discord’s chest, glaring intensely into the chaotic god’s surprised eyes.

“Givemeonereasontobehappyyou’reback. Now,” she demanded.

After taking a moment to process what she was saying Discord stroked his beard with he free claw while thinking. After a moment he snapped his fingers and from outside came a flash of light followed quickly by an earth-shaking thud. Everypony turned to see that right outside Flutteryshy’s home was a large and elaborate fountain made of peppermint spraying chocolate into the air.

Everypony could almost feel Pinkie Pie gasp in joy before dashing outside, only to dash back in a moment later with her Party Cannon in tow.

“WELCOME BACK DISCORD PARTY!”

The cannon fired and within an instant the inside of Fluttershy’s cottage was adorned with balloons, streamers, and even a banner that read “Welcome Back Discord!”

“Pinkie Pie!” Rainbow Dash shouted after spitting out some confetti.

“Well isn’t this a surprise! Looks like there’s more than one pony who’s welcoming me with open hooves!” Discord exclaimed with glee.

“Yup!” the pink mare nodded.

“Sugarcube, I never thought ah’d hafta ask ya this considerin’, but ‘Are you right in tha’ head!?’ How can ya be happy ta see Discord again!?” Applejack screamed.

“Well, because he’s fun!”

“I’m sorry darling, but ‘fun’? We are talking about the same Discord aren’t we?” Rarirty asked with a completely stunned look on her face.

“Yeah, fun! Thinking back on it now, a lot of the stuff he did was fun! You know, aside from the destroying Ponyville part. And the taking away horns and wings part. And the tricking us into being the opposite of ourselves part. And the flooding Apple Acres part. And the not having any whipped cream to- oh!” Pinke Pie cut herself off before jumping back onto Discord and glaring at him in the same matter she did when she first arrived. “Cotton candy cloud. Chocolate milk rain. With whipped cream this time,” she demanded.

“Seriously?” Rainbow Dash asked while facehoofing.

“Well, aren’t we pushy?” Discord mused smugly. “Still, I do appreciate the party favors, so I guess I can accommodate you this once.”

With another snap and flash a ten foot tall glass with a red and white striped silly straw long enough to stretch down to the ground appeared outside. With another snap the long awaited cotton candy cloud appeared above it and rained the brown sweet liquid into the glass, which filled from left to right. The cloud disappeared after its job was done.

Pinkie Pie clapped her hooves in glee and dashed outside to sample the drink before pausing.

“Hey, what about the whipped cream?” she asked in a frustrated tone.

With an ever widening grin Discord snapped again, a bright flash following immediately after, but it came from above the pink pony this time. As she looked up the door suddenly slammed shut. Not a moment later the sound of a mass of something hitting the ground came from outside and the windows were covered with white.

“What’d you do!?” Rainbow Dash shouted, raising a hoof threateningly.

“Oh relax would you?”

The front door swung back open and right outside was Pinkie, covered in whipped cream and thoroughly enjoying her sweet treat via the massive straw provided for her.

“See?” Fluttershy said. “Discord’s on his best behavior. I mean, well, maybe not best, but he’s at least-“

“Ooh!”

Before anypony realized what happened Pinkie Pie was now hiding under the couch.

“Pinkie Pie?” Rainbow asked confused.

“What’s wrong, darling?” Rarity joined in.

“My tail’s twitching!” the pink mare answered nervously.

“But that means-“

Before she could finish a scream came from outside, growing in volume signifying the approach of its source. Moments later something fell into the large glass, sending the chocolate milk splashing up into the air and raining down upon the ground outside as well as Fluttershy’s home.

“MY CHOCLATE MILK WITH WHIPPED CREAM! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

“Just what was that?” Applejack asked. Everyone gathered towards the glass only for their eyes to widen in realization after recognizing the purple pony inside.

“T-Twilight?!” the five mares called in confusion.

“Ugh… Guess I’m still not used to flying,” the violet alicorn moaned. Magic gathered in her horn for a moment before she disappeared in a flash of light, only to reappear a few feet away. With another quick spell the chocolate milk and whipped cream disappeared off her body. After a sigh of relief she turned towards her friends.

“Hey girls, sorry to give you a scare,” she apologized with an embarrassed smile.

The other five ponies sprinted forward and hugged her, showering her with affection.

“Good ta see ya back, sugarcube!” said Applejack.

“So good to see you back, darling!” Rarity chimed.

“I’m so happy to see you that I totally forgive you ruining my chocolate milk with whipped cream!” Pinke exclaimed, giving Twilight and extra tight hug.

“Thanks Pin-Wait, what?” Twilight asked.

“Uh, anyway,” Rainbow continued getting back on topic, “What’re you doing back? I thought you couldn’t leave Canterlot for a few months with those whole ‘princess lessons’ or whatever.”

“Well, technically I am still taking my lessons,” Twilight explained, her tone turning somewhat more serious. “Princess Celestia thought that now might be a good time to get in some ‘field work.’”

“’Field work?’”

Twilight gently broke away from her friends’ hugs and looked to Fluttershy. “You understand what I’m talking about, don’t you Fluttershy?” It was more a statement than a question. The yellow pegasus seemed to shrink a bit in response. She opened her mouth the respond but soon closed it and simply nodded. The violet alicorn nodded back with a sympathetic yet still stern look on her face and stepped passed her.

“Oh, now why did you have to ruin that?” the draconequus complained with a pouty look. “I was enjoying myself! It was cute and, more importantly, unexpected!”

“Hello, Discord. Good to see you doing well,” Twilight responded with a practiced tone of respectful antagonism.

“Now now, you shouldn’t lie Sparkle,” Discord teased with a smug look.

Twilight Sparkle groaned and rolled her eyes but quickly regained her composure. “Ok then,” she started again, her voice failing to conceal her irritation, “It’s not completely terrible to see you here, Discord.”

“There we go! By the way,” he began before two flashes of light came from nowhere. “I see the rumors were true! These prove it, huh?” he commented, holding her wings in his hands.

Shocked, everypony looked to see Twilight was indeed missing her wings.

“Discord!” Fluttershy scolded. “Put those-!”

“That’s it!” Rainbow Dash shouted. “Now we’re gonna-!”

“Rainbow!”

The group was surprised to hear Twilight telling her friend to back down.

“B-But!”

“Just hold on for a second,” she said before turning back to the draconequus. “Yes, Discord, I’m a Princess now. You’ve had your fun, now give those back,” she sternly demanded.

“Please, Discord,” Fluttershy added pleadingly.

Discord groaned. “Fine,” he answered and with another set of flashes Twilight’s wings were back where they belonged. “You’ve been spending far too much time with Celestia for my tastes, trying to be all calm and composed. I was hoping for a better reaction than that.”

“Sorry to disappoint you,” she responded, laying on the sarcasm extra thick.

“Oh, I’m sure you are. So, ‘Princess Lessons’, huh? Is Celestia teaching you how to down a million cakes without gaining any weight?” he asked smugly.

“Hey! Watch your-!”

Twilight was cut off when Discord pinched both her cheeks. “Aww! You so cwute when you’re all pouty!” he teased in a babyish tone.

“Discord, that’s enough!” Fluttershy scolded with some surprising volume to her voice.

“Oh fine, I’m done anyway,” Discord let go of the alicorn’s face before yawing. “Well, unless somepony’s got something actually important to tell me, I’m going to go-“

“You wait here, I’m not done talking to you yet,” Twilight ordered in a stern yet calm voice. “Fluttershy, could we talk outside for a moment?”

“Um, o-ok,” the shy pegasus answered before following her friend outside.

“Huh, this should be interesting,” Discord muttered as he laid back in mid-air.

--

“U-Um, so, what did you want to talk about, Twilight?” Fluttershy asked. The violet alicorn had simply led her to the side of Fluttershy’s cottage before stopping.

“Well, I’m sure it’s not hard to guess,” she answered.

“Twilight,” Fluttershy complained.

“Look, Fluttershy, I really do think Discord’s reformed himself. And I really do think he’s kept it up even while on his little trip around Equestria.”

“Y-You do?”

“Of course. If he’d caused trouble, we’d definitely have heard about it by now.”

Fluttershy looked a bit disappointed, but responded with a nod all the same. “So, what’s wrong then?”

“The problem that I, and Celestia and Luna, are worried about is if he’ll stay reformed.”

“But Twilight-!”

“Fluttershy, he’s the embodiment of disharmony itself. He’s going to want to shake things up in some way or another, it’s in his nature. Now that doesn’t have to be bad, after all Pinkie Pie’s pretty crazy herself and nothing bad really happens when she does anything crazy, but it’s just… well-“

“I understand, Twilight,” the pegasus answered with surprising conviction in her voice.

“F-Fluttershy?”

“Everypony is still afraid of Discord. I understand. But I know he won’t do anything really, truly bad. I’ll make sure of it. And I really think that Discord doesn’t want to be bad anymore, either.”

Twilight Sparkle just stared for moment before closing her eyes and sighing. She opened her eyes and a warm smile stretched across her face. “I keep forgetting how strong you really are, Fluttershy. After all, you got Discord to give up even after he’d won. I guess I really am worrying over nothing.”

Fluttershy smiled back. “Thank you, Twilight.”

“C’mon, let’s get back.”

--

The two mares returned to find everything pretty much the same as when they had left. Rarity was pretending to mind her physical appearance while watching Discord through the mirror. Pinkie Pie was enjoying the chocolate fountain Discord had made earlier, while Applejack was watching Discord calmly, doing her best to relax. Rainbow Dash glared at Discord, ready to pounce if he tried anything, and Angel Bunny still clung to his spot on the couch. But there was still something odd about the fragile peace and it took Twilight a minute to realize why: Discord was just relaxing in mid-air. Discord wasn’t doing anything.

The draconequus opened his eyes and smirked at the new Princess. “Well, done with your little chat girls?” he asked.

“Ok Discord, here’s what’s going to happen,” the alicorn began, ignoring his question completely. “I don’t know if you know this, but Princess Celestia had planned to gradually introduce you into the lives of everypony once you’d been reformed, but then you had to go and fly off on your little vacation.”

“Of course. You can’t really expect me to just sit around with nothing to do.”

“Well, you’re going to have to get used to it, at least for a couple of days.”

“Oh?”

“Everypony in Ponyville and Canterlot are on the verge of panicking now that they know you’re on the loose, so I want you to stay put for a while so they can calm down.”

“Fine,” Discord mumbled in an annoyed tone.

“In the meantime,” she continued turning to her friends. “We’re all going to be wearing the Elements of Harmony for a while.”

“B-But Twilight!” Fluttershy complained.

“We’re not going to use them, Fluttershy, it’s just to give everypony else some peace of mind. They’ll feel safer if they see we’re ready to stop him for good at any time.”

“But we’re not going to use them, right?” the pegasus asked sternly.

“I promise. Besides, they won’t work if you won’t use yours with the rest of us.”

“I can’t believe we’re doing this,” Rainbow Dash grumbled.

“Rainbow,” Twilight chided.

“Why should we have to put up with this? Why should we have to give him any room to do anything? He’s Discord!” she shouted.

“Now hold on there, sugarcube,” Applejack butted in. “Ah ain’t happy ta see him here neither, but I’m not gonna bring my hoof down if he ain’t done nothin’.”

“Aw, you’re sticking up for me! How sweet,” Discord said smugly.

“Jus’ don’t give me a reason not ta, get me?” she responded, giving him a harsh look.

“I can’t believe this!” Rainbow Dash shouted.

“Rainbow, darling, just what is wrong with you? I’ve never seen you so upset,” Rarity asked, concerned.

“’What’s wrong?’ ‘What’s wrong!?’ Did you forget what he did to you? To us? He ruined Ponyville and broke us up just because he thought it was funny!” She turned to the draconequus before continuing, her eyes shooting daggers. “You took away my wings because you thought it was funny! You made me turn my back on my friends because you thought it was funny!”

The room went quiet, nopony made a sound. After a few moments of tension Discord sighed and said two words nopony was expecting him to say.

“I’m sorry.”

Everypony froze again. More than just uttering those words was the fact that they sounded genuine. Rainbow Dash completely lost her steam, and a small yet warm smile spread across Fluttershy’s face.

“Y-You… You don’t really mean that,” Rainbow huffed, turning away from him.

“Well, if that’s how you’re going to act, then I guess I don’t,” he responded indignantly.

Rainbow’s temper flared again and she turned back to face the draconequus, seething. “Why you-!”

“Rainbow, that’s enough!” Twilight called.

“B-But-!”

“Spike should be back at the library with the Elements of Harmony by now, let’s all go to get them and cool off,” she ordered. “And Discord, stop being so… so you for a minute.”

Rainbow Dash snorted before flying out the door, not waiting for anyone else to catch up. The draconequus simply shrugged and went back to his hot chocolate.

As the other four remaining mares left, Fluttershy stayed behind a moment, gazing at Discord with a kind of maternal happiness.

“Discord, I’m very proud of you,” she said simply.

The draconequus looked back to her and gave a similarly warm smile.

“Hey, it’s the least I can do after you stood up for me,” he said simply.

“Huh?”

“When you were talking with Twilight,” he explained. “I appreciate it.”

“But, um, how did you-?” she began.

Discord floated down towards her and reached behind her ear. He pulled out a small object and put it in his mouth. It took her a moment to realize it, but his tooth had been missing the whole time.

“I heard every word,” he explained. “Thank you.”

She smiled back. “You’re welcome,” she said before quickly following her friends out the door, closing it behind her.

Discord simply lied backwards in the air and was about to take another sip of his drink when he saw Angel Bunny out of the corner of his eye. The small rabbit still gripped his spot on the sofa, looking to the unwanted guest with a suspicious gaze.

“Oh go eat a carrot, I’m getting enough of that from Rainbow-brain already,” he complained before taking another sip.

Author's Note

Ok, so my first MLP fic ever. Unlike many of you I've yet to watch the entire series (haven't even finished season 1, aside from a few jumps ahead) so I apologize if not everyone is completely in character.

After a few comics by a phenomenal artist on deviantart about Discord doing his best to reform, or at least render harmless, Chrysalis and King Sombra using methods that would provide him the most personal amusement I just had to make a fnafic of my idea of how it came to be. After all, Discord was the reason I started watching MLP in the first place, so of course the story will mostly focus on him. Hopefully you'll all enjoy and stick with me to the end, which really shouldn't be that long.

Rate and review everypony!

The Challenge

Months had passed since Discord’s presence had been made known to Ponyville, Canterlot, and eventually all of Equestria. Panic had arisen all over in numerous cities and towns, with Ponyville suffering the worst. Riots had nearly broken out on Nightmare Night once the ponies realized that Princess Luna was in fact not just trying to scare them. If it were not for the volume of her traditional royal Canterlot voice she would never have been able to rein them in over their screams. It was only a few hours later that Princess Twilight Sparkle and the other Elements of Harmony made Discord’s reformation known. Just like she’d expected, nopony really believed her but they had enough faith to believe the members of the Elements had everything under control, seeing as how they were all wearing their respective element jewelry. Still, Ponyville was a powder keg ready to go, just waiting for a chaotic spark to set it off.

Except that didn’t happen. Despite the fears of the ponies there was no massive catastrophe, no floating houses, no checkered skies, no ponies acting like the opposite of themselves, not even a flood again. Many thought the God of Chaos was simply waiting for a bigger event to unleash his particular brand of terror upon, like a holiday or some other special event. But Hearth’s Warming Eve and Day passed by without incident, as did Hearts and Hooves Day. Even Winter Wrap Up, the day a Discord-related scheme could certainly have caused the most damage, went without incident. By the time April rolled around the idea of chaos suddenly raining upon the heads of everypony had mostly fallen to the back of ponies’ minds, something they knew could happen but didn't expect to happen.

That is not to say, however, the time between October and the present was completely without incident. Every so often Ponyville was plagued with certain problems that could only have been caused by a certain draconequus. The incidents ranged from everpony’s pictures having the ponies depicted within wearing ridiculous outfits to the entire town’s water system being replaced with lemonade for a few hours. These incidents ranged from the irritating to the downright infuriating, and all of them were followed by an unmistakable laugh or giggle. Still nopony was ever hurt beyond a few cuts or bruises, and everything would right itself soon afterward. Despite the terror that the name “Discord” held throughout most of Equestria, for most of the populace in Ponyville the name had become synonymous with “annoying”.

However, there were a few who regarded the draconequus as an enemy, in their own way. Three fillies in particular were enacting their most recent plan to defeat him…

--

The pegasus adjusted her cape as a signal to the others she was ready. The earth pony and the unicorn did the same.

“NOW!” she shouted.

The unicorn threw a net with magic, successfully landing it on her target. The earth pony threw a lasso that wrapped over the net, restraining the target even more. The pegasus jumped and landed on their target, toppling it over and soon the other two fillies did the same.

“We got ‘im!” the earth pony shouted.

“WE GOT HIM, WE GOT HIM, WE GOT HIM!” they all exclaimed in unison while hopping up and down on their quarry, only to stop once they heard him squeaking. They looked down and to their horror they saw that they were standing on a life-sized squeaky toy.

“You got whom now?” asked a familiar smug voice, sending a shiver up their spines.

Before they could react the lasso undid itself and wrapped around the three fillies, and then the net closed around them before levitating and tying itself to a nearby tree branch.

The three fillies struggled a moment before they noticed the long figure gazing at them with a sinister smirk.

“Should’ve picked your fights more carefully girls,” he said. He then snapped his claws and in a flash of light three devices appeared that filled the little fillies with horror. “Now it’s payback time.”

The three girls' screams were drowned out by the dense trees of the Everfree Forest…

--

Minutes later the three fillies panted, their coats and manes drenched with sweat and tears as they were splayed across the ground, mercifully freed from their prison while their tormentor sat next to them, sitting in midair while a newspaper, a teapot and a cup of tea floated in front of him.

The orange-coated pegasus slammed her front hooves in front of her in frustration.

“Darn you, Discord!” she shouted.

“It’s your fault for picking a fight you couldn’t win, Chickenloo,” the draconequus taunted back, taking a sip of his tea and not even looking at the filly.

“Stop calling me that!”

“Aw shucks, outdid again,” Applebloom lamented.

“We’ll never get our ‘beating Discord’ cutie marks at this rate,” Sweetie Belle lamented.

“Honestly, how many times do I have to put you fillies through tickle torture before you realize you’re not going to beat me?” Discord commented. “Maybe you should try something easier. Like shark wrestling.”

“We’re not afraid of you Discord!” Scootaloo retorted.

“Oh really?” Discord turned to the filly with a devious look before snapping his fingers. The three feathers from before appeared in flashes of light. “You sure about that?”

The three fillies winced in response.

“Thought so,” he stated smugly before dismissing the three feathers with another snap and turning back to his paper.

Scootaloo growled. “C’mon girls, let’s go and find Rainbow Dash,” she said while turning to walk away.

“Don’t bother, she’ll be here soon,” Discord stated blandly while turning the page in his newspaper.

“Huh?”

“GIT DOWN HERE, YA DERN HAT!”

The three fillies turned to look down the road and saw Applejack wrestling with her own hat. The hat was floating in mid-air and despite pulling on it as hard as she could it showed no signs of coming back to the earth pony, possessing enough power to actually pull the farm mare along.

“Applejack? What’r ya doin’?” Applebloom asked.

“Huh?”

The earth pony had yet to notice her sister until now and the distraction was enough to cause her to trip and fall flat on her face. The hat continued its journey forwards, stopping only once it rose above Discord’s head.

“Discord!” Applejack shouted, her hoof instinctively going to the Element of Honesty around her neck. “I knew this was yer work, dagnabit! Gimme back mah hat!”

“Not just yet,” the draconequus replied nonchalantly, not even turning to face her. “We still need to wait for everyone else to arrive,” he explained as he sipped his tea.

“Huh? Whatdya mean by-?”

“DISCORD!” came a panicked voice.

The four ponies turned back to look down the road and their mouths hung open in shock and disgust as they saw the white-coated unicorn galloping towards them at full speed. She only stopped once she was in front of the God of Chaos.

“Fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it FIX IT FIX IT FIX IT FIX IT!” she repeated over and over again, her voice getting progressively louder and angrier as she continued.

Discord poured himself some tea from the teapot, which looped several times in mid-air before landing inside his teacup. “Nope,” Discord replied simply before taking another sip, causing Rarity to unleash an ear-piercing shriek of horror and frustration.

“Rarity, what is that?” Applejack asked, her eyes still wide in shock.

“Is that an… afro?” Sweetie Belle asked looking at the poofy and round state her older sister’s mane was currently in.

“I’ve tried everything! Baths, hair gels, hair sprays, shampoos, conditioners, curling irons, even a trip to the spa! Nothing works! Of all the worst things that could happen, this is the! Worst! POSSIBLE! THING!” she lamented, tears streaming down her face as she collapsed onto the ground in a fit.

“And here comes the third one,” Discord said to no one in particular. “In three, two, one.”

As he finished counting, a battle cry could be heard, increasing in volume as it approached. The five girls turned to look to the sky. Scootaloo smiled as they saw a rainbow streak heading right towards them, the cyan pegasus coming into view. When she was seconds from crashing into Discord he nonchalantly snapped his fingers and a giant slingshot appeared in her path. Rainbow Dash was too late to stop herself and got caught on the device and flung back the way she came. With another snap of his fingers a net on the end of a pole appeared, tall enough to catch the cyan pegasus as she flew back. The force of the mare hitting the net caused it to bend backwards for a moment and Discord snapped is fingers one more time, creating a large pile of clothes on the ground. Finally the pole snapped forward and flung Rainbow Dash at the ground, landing directly into the pile of clothing, sending garments of all kinds in every direction. Rainbow Dash pulled herself out of the pile and sprinted over to Scootaloo.

“Are you ok Scoots!?” she shouted, clearly worried about her. The young pegasus filly looked at her idol in horror, slack jawed and not making a sound. “Scoots? Scootaloo, what’s wrong with you!”

“I see you got my message,” Discord interrupted, a smug smirk spreading across his face despite not looking at the pony he was antagonizing.

“You!” Rainbow shouted, pointing her hoof at Discord. “What did you do to-!?” Rainbow stopped when she noticed the feather duster in her hoof. “What the hay?” She looked down at herself and her cheeks flushed crimson in embarrassment. She was dressed as a maid, complete with headband, apron, and plenty of poofy lace. “Wh-What the hay is this!?” she shouted pulling at her outfit, which refused to come off. She wasn’t even able to let go of her feather duster. “G-Get this off me!”

“Ooh! You look pretty, Dashie! Is that one of Rarity’s dresses? I never thought you’d volunteer for her!”

Everyone turned to see Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy approaching from up the road.

“Wow! Looks like almost everyone’s trying new styles, huh?” the pink mare continued. “AJ, you don’t look bad without your hat, and Rarity you look, um… nice?” she finished weakly.

“See!? Even Pinkie Pie thinks it’s atrocious!” Rarity complained. “Please Fluttershy, make him fix it! I don’t think I can go on much longer with this fashion disaster, no, fashion apocalypse on my head!” she pleaded, groveling at the yellow pegasus’ hooves.

Fluttershy glared at Discord, then simply sighed and shook her head, a combination of actions that she had been employing quite a bit in recent days. She set down the picnic basket she was carrying before speaking. “Discord, again?” she asked in a tone reminiscent of a disappointed parent.

“I was bored,” he answered, his tone seeming to imply that this was a perfectly acceptable answer. “By the way, how did that carrot cake come along?” he asked, actually turning his head to look at whom he was addressing.

“’Carrot-carrot cake’,” the pink mare corrected, “And yup, it turned out great, see?” She reached into the picnic basket and pulled out a carrot cake with six carrots sticking out of the top.

“What kinda cake is that?” Applejack asked, clearly confused with the combination vegetable pastry.

“It’s for Angel Bunny,” Discord explained. “Pinkie Pie thought they could get him to eat his carrots if they were put into a pastry. A nice thought, but I doubt it’ll work.”

“What do you mean? What’s wrong with it?” Pinkie Pie asked.

“Nothing, as far as I’m concerned, but then again I’m not a picky eater. Angel’s just going to eat around the carrots.”

“That’s what you think,“ Pinkie retorted, a smug smile stretching across her face. “The big carrots sticking out of the top are really candies, the real carrots are sliced up and all inside the cake!”

“My, aren’t we devious?” Discord commented, genuinely surprised by the pink mare’s cleverness. “Still, I can’t believe you need to go through all these hoops for a rabbit. Honestly, I just never understood picky eaters.”

“Maybe because ya’d even drink glass,” Applejack commented.

“Can we put off the talk of pastries and get back the matter at hoof?” Rarity interrupted, pointing at her mane.

“Seriously, get me out of this, it’s embarrassing!” Rainbow Dash commented.

“Ah guess ah don’ have much t’ complain ‘bout compared ta you two, but ah’d like mah hat back, if’n ya don’ mind,” Applejack said.

“Right. Um, Discord, could you please put everything back the way it’s supposed to be? Um, pretty please?” Fluttershy asked, trying to be as calm and lenient as possible.

“Sure,” the draconequus answered simply.

“R-Really?” Fluttershy asked in disbelief, both shock and delight clearly evident upon her face.

“Yup. In juuuust minute.”

Fluttershy’s face drooped and she sighed. “Discord,” she complained.

“Figures,” Scootaloo grumbled, finally speaking up. “I bet you didn’t even have a good reason to do this.”

“Well that’s bit harsh, considering that you three were the reason I did all this,” Discord retorted.

“Huh?”

“Whaddya mean by that?” Applebloom asked.

“Isn’t it obvious?”

“With you, never,” Sweetie Belle retorted.

“Your sisters, or sister figure in your case Chickenloo,-“

“STOP CALLING ME THAT!”

“-were probably wondering where you were. So I just figured I’d let them know.”

“You mean ta tell me,” Applejack began, “that ya made mah hat fly off, turned Rarity’s mane into that ball, and-“

“-sent me a message that Scootaloo was in danger, from you, and dressing me up in this embarrassing outfit, just so we could come pick up the girls!?” Rainbow Dash finished with a shout.

“Yup.”

“And you couldn’t just call us over because…?”

“This way was more fun.”

The annoyed mares each let out a groan of frustration.

Fluttershy simply shook her head. “Ok Discord, could you put everything back now? Please?”

“Not quite yet. Waiting for Twilight to show up.”

Everyone perked up at that.

“Twilight? What’s she got ta do with this?” Applejack asked.

“Oh nothing much, just that while I was pranking the rest of you I figured I’d do the same to her too. Didn’t want to leave her out,” he answered smugly.

“Discord!” Fluttershy scolded.

“Oh come on, it’s all in good fun. Besides, I think all of you will get a kick out of it, too. Not some of my best work, but I think it’ll work well enough. It’ll certainly make all of you feel like you got let off easy.”

“’Let off easy’?! Nothing could possibly be worse than this!” Rarity retorted, pointing to her mane once again.

Just then a violet flash of light appeared nearby, fading to reveal an alicorn. Everypony turned to look at the new arrival, and for a moment everything was completely silent.

“I stand corrected,” Rarity said, her eyes wide in horror in disgust.

“What. The. Hay,” Sweetie Belle uttered, her expression seeming to show she was straining to comprehend what was in front of her.

“Land sakes!” the two Apple sisters exclaimed.

“Yowza!” Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo remarked.

“Oh… Oh my,” Fluttershy muttered.

Discord and Pinkie Pie just stared at the new arrival, Pinkie’s jaw open in shock while Discord’s expression was surprisingly blank.

Staring back at them all was Twilight Sparkle, her coat now white with red polka-dots and her mane a gaudily bright orange. Her face perfectly conveyed the message “I am not amused.”

From the draconequus came a snort. Everypony turned to him as he struggled to suppress a smile, failing spectacularly. Discord began to shake with mirth before finally bursting out laughing, falling out of the air onto his back and tumbling around. Before long Pinkie Pie was also joining him in his merriment.

“Pinkie Pie, c-cut that out!” Applejack stuttered, trying to stifle her own laughter and erase the smile trying to force its way on her face. “That’s inf-fectious!”

Before long everypony else was snickering or giggling along with the trickster god and the pink mare. As the draconequus finally settled down the rest of them slowly composed themselves, everpony but Pinkie Pie attempting to convince themselves they weren’t laughing just a moment ago, but still feeling more lighthearted than before. Even Twilight looked less annoyed, but was still noticeably upset.

Discord brought himself from the ground, wiping the last tears from his eyes as the last few giggles escaped his lips.

“Priceless, Sparkle. Your expression is what really sells it,” he explained.

“Thanks,” she said flatly. “Now change everything back, please.”

“Ok, ok, fair’s fair.”

Discord snapped his fingers and several flashes of light came and went. Applejack’s hat appeared back upon her head, Rarity’s mane was back to its normal elegant style, and Twilight Sparkle’s coat and mane were back to their usual colors.

“What about me!?” Raibow Dash screamed.

“You can take it off now, can’t you?”

Rainbow stopped for a moment before successfully dropping the feather duster. Once she realized she in fact could remove the embarrassing outfit she set to work taking it off immediately, furiously pulling and wiggling her way out of it until she finally got it off.

“I can’t believe we ever turned you back from stone. I don’t know what Celestia was thinking!”

“Rainbow Dash!” Twilight shouted, both shocked and a bit upset at that comment.

“I’m sorry, but I have to say this! She had us free him because she wanted to see if he could do some good, and look where that’s got us! Pranks of all kinds! All he’s proven so far is that he can be a jerk instead of completely evil!”

“Rainbow!” Fluttershy scolded.

“I take offense to that,” Discord quipped.

“Oh yeah?! Well how about you do something that helps everypony for once instead of just pulling pranks all the time?!”

“I have my reasons.”

“Like what?”

“Several, but the main one being I don’t feel like it.”

Rainbow Dash shouted in frustration while everypony else rolled their eyes and groaned.

“I bet the reason you aren’t doing anything good is because you can’t!” the pegasus shouted.

Surprisingly, that made Discord stop in his tracks. He quickly slurped the rest of his tea before releasing the cup which suddenly rocketed into the air and exploded like a firework. He then ate the entire teapot in one bite before folding up the newspaper and floating over to the cyan mare.

“Is that a challenge?” he asked, both his expression and his tone surprisingly serious.

Rainbow took a moment to process the whole situation, but then a confident smirk spread across her face.

“You know what? Yeah, it is! I bet you can’t do anything really good or nice even if you tried!”

Discord stood up straight and snapped his fingers, summoning his red-rimmed sunglasses before placing them on his head and crossing his arms.

“Challenge accepted,” he uttered in a tone so serious it was almost comical.

“Oh! Oh!” Pinkie Pie shouted before zipping in front of Discord. She turned to face the same way he was, stood on her hind legs, pulled out a pair of identical sunglasses from Celestia knew where, put them on and crossed her forelegs in the same manner.

“Like a boss,” she proclaimed in a similar tone.

“Nice one.”

“Thanks.”

Rainbow Dash took a moment to recover from the odd sight. “Pinkie Pie, where did you get those?”

“Discord made me a pair! Aren’t they nifty?”

Rainbow shook her head for a moment before turning back to Discord. “Anyways, I better be there or it won’t count!”

“Oh, you’ll be there alright,” the draconequus replied confidently.

Rainbow merely grunted, before turning away. “C’mon Scoots, I think it’s about time we had another flying lesson.”

The pegasus filly seemed to glow with joy after hearing that.

“Alright! Sure thing Rainbow!”

“And I’m going to need a trip to the spa to relax after this whole ordeal,” Rarity commented. “Would anypony care to join me?”

“Sorry, but I gotta tend the farm. Need ta make up for lost time after this little fiasco,” Applejack replied.

“I’ll come with you, sis!” Sweetie Belle quipped.

Rarity’s smile faltered for a moment. “Um, that’s sounds great dear, but, um, maybe you and Appble Bloom could help out Rainbow Dash give Scootaloo flight lessons. Just because you’re not pegasi doesn’t mean you can’t be flight instructors.”

All three of the fillies gasped, and everypony knew what was coming next. Discord quickly snapped his fingers and a pair of earmuffs appeared on both Fluttershy's and Pinkie Pie’s heads. A set of corks appeared in his claw and paw, which he quickly inserted into his own ears.

“CUTIE MARK CRUSEDER FLIGHT INSTRUCTORS, YAY!”

The three fillies ran off excitedly, too caught up in their recent ploy to even realize that their teacher had not even left yet. Rainbow Dash gave Rarity an annoyed look but merely shrugged and flew after them.

“Oh! That’s right!” Pinkie Pie shouted, removing her earmuffs and sunglasses. “I’ve got to babysit Pumpkin and Pound in a little bit! See you later everypony!” she called before quickly bouncing off.

Applejack and Rarity trotted off down the way they came, giving Fluttershy a quick goodbye as they went.

Discord snapped and the corks and earmuffs disappeared in a flash. “Arrivederci, everypony!” he called as he waved. After a moment he looked down to see that Twilight Sparkle was staring right back at him. “Oh, you’re still here?”

“Discord, are you really going to follow through on that challenge?” the alicorn princess asked, her expression neutral but her eyes scrutinizing the trickster god.

Discord removed his sunglasses and stroked his beard in a thoughtful manner for a moment. “I suppose I am bored enough to do that, yes,” he answered with smug grin, dismissing his glasses in another flash.

Twilight sighed and rolled her eyes before gathering power in her horn. “If nothing else this should be interesting, I guess.” And with a pink flash of a teleportation spell she was gone.

“Um, Dis-“

“Flutter-“

The pegasus and the draconequus stopped when they realized they were trying to talk at the same time.

“Um, you can go first,” Fluttershy said.

“Uh, thanks,” Discord replied, clearing his throat in an embarrassed manner. “Uh, can we talk and walk?” he asked, motioning his head back down the path to her cottage.

“Um, sure, if that’s what you’d like,” she said while picking up the picnic basket with the carrot carrot cake and placing it upon her back.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” she asked as they started down the path.

“Uh, well, you see…” Discord began, looking uncharacteristically unsure of himself. “I… I wanted to thank you.”

“Um, ok. For what?”

“Well, for… for…” Discord then muttered something under his breath.

“Um, I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that.”

Discord sighed before clearing his throat again. “I said ‘I wanted to thank you for putting up with me.’”

Fluttershy almost tripped upon hearing that but quickly righted herself.

“Discord?” she asked incredulously, unable to think of anything else to say.

“It’s just that, well, I’m sure there’s a lot of pressure on you to get me go on the straight and narrow instead of giving me some room, and I’m sure my pranks aren’t helping. I wanted to apologize for that.”

“You’re sorry about all those pranks you pulled?”

“Oh no, not one of them,” he explained with a smirk. “I just wanted to apologize for any grief you’ve been given because of it."

Fluttershy rolled her eyes but couldn’t help but smile all the same. “Well, I guess it’s a start. Now, do you have any ideas on how to do something good for somepony else?”

“Plenty,” the draconequus replied simply. “They’re all just boring as hay.”

“Discord, you don’t do good things because you want to do them,” she scolded.

“Hey, I’ve got plenty of other good reasons why I don’t do them.”

“Like?”

“Ok, imagine somepony’s house get’s destroyed for some reason. I snap my claw and ‘poof’, back to normal. That pony’s happy, and then word gets around. Then somepony else wants me to do a favor, and then someopony else. Eventually, everypony gets used to me helping out, to the point they stop doing anything altogether. ‘Parasprite infestation? No problem, Discord will fix it.’ ‘Crops not as bountiful this year? No worries, Discord’ll fix it.’ ‘Leaky pipe? Don’t worry, Discord will fix it.’ Soon enough, I’ll be using my magic to wash dishes and everypony else will get lazy.”

Fluttershy stared slack jawed for a moment before responding. “I… I never thought of that. I’m also a bit surprised that you did.”

“Of course,” he said with a prideful smirk. “I’m a creature of Chaos. If I didn’t understand Harmony how could I upset it effectively? No, if I’m going to win this bet I’ll need to do something more than just a simple good deed here or there. Something bigger, more elaborate. Though I can’t really decide what.”

“Well, I’m sure it will come to you.”

“Hm. Hey, how about another story while I’m thinking. Regale me with another tale of you and your little friends’ misadventures.”

“Um, you mean ‘adventures’, right?” she asked.

“Either or.”

“Um… Well there was the time Ponyville was chosen to get water to Cloudsdale.”

“Nah, doesn’t sound like my thing.”

“Um…How about the time Rainbow Dash held a competition to choose her pet?”

“Already told me that one.”

“Oh, I did? I’m sorry. Um… well, there was that time Trixie came back.”

“’Trixie?’ The showmare? I’m surprised she had the guts to come back after being shown up by Sparkle last time.”

“Well, she was back for revenge.”

“’Revenge?’ How was she supposed to get revenge?”

“Well, first of all…

--

“… and then she left, calling herself the ‘Great and Apologetic Trixie,’” Fluttershy finished.

Discord sipped some tea with a rather surprised look on his face. “I have to say, I’m rather impressed. I don’t think I’ve been giving all of you enough credit, you’re much more devious than I would’ve ever thought, especially Twilight.”

“Um, ‘devious?’” the pink maned pegasus asked.

“Of course, all of you pulling off those tricks to fool that megalomaniacal unicorn. Quite impressive.”

“But, we just did it to get Trixie to take off that scary amulet.”

“Yes, I know you did it for a good reason, but that doesn’t change the fact that little Sparkle used such underhoofed tactics to… to…”

Discord suddenly stopped mid-sentence, appearing to be lost in thought, like some previously unthought of notion was bubbling its way to the surface of his conscious mind.

“Discord? Um, are you-“

Before she could finish the draconequus sprang forward and grabbed her before planting a long kiss on her forehead. “Fluttershy, you magnificent mare you! I knew there was a reason I came back here to live with you!” he proclaimed with a twinkle in his eyes while pinching her cheeks. “What a wonderful little muse you are! ‘Scuse me!”

And with that he disappeared in flash of light, leaving a very confused pegasus behind.

“Um… you’re welcome?”

Author's Note

Chapter two finally done. This took longer than I thought, mostly because some of the parts here I didn't fully enjoy writing so I had to push through to get to the good parts. With any luck the third chapter should come out faster seeing as how I know I'm going to love writing that one.

Anyway, I was also hoping you could do me a favor. I'm writing another MLP fanfic on my deviantart account called "Myth of the Blues Traveler." I can't post it here due to the rule about copywrited song lyrics. Give at read if you'd like but what I really need is some blues songs and some scenarios they could go to. If you read the fic you should get an idea of what I'm going for.

Anyway, thanks for reading everypony and I hope to see you for chapter 3! Rate and review please!

The Pitch

One Week Later…

--

Celestia yawned, ignoring the drowsiness insisting she go back to bed. It would soon be time to raise the Sun, and as much as she enjoyed a normal sleep pattern after a thousand years of covering for her sister she knew what she had to do. It was her own sense of duty that pushed her to stay awake, as well as the warmth of Luna’s foreleg around her midsection…

Until she realized that she hadn’t slept alongside her sister since she had grown back to her normal size and power, retaking her duties as co-ruler of Equestria. Celestia quickly turned her head to the being lying with her and her eyes widened in shock.

The figure smirked. “Did you sleep well darling?”

That morning it seemed that all of Canterlot, and it maybe even all of Equestria, awoke early to the sound of its Princess shrieking in terror…

--

Luna groaned, her eyes squinting due to annoyance and tiredness. The Princess of the Night had just finished her duties, lowering the moon before her sister awoke to raise the sun. She would’ve been ready to get to bed if not for the piercing scream that rang throughout the land, with her beloved sister as its source. As for the cause of her sister’s outburst, well…

“Discord, could you please stop?” the dark blue alicorn pleaded for what felt like the hundredth time.

The draconequus was giggling giddily, snapping and warping the reality of the Canterlot grand hall back and forth rapidly as he went seemingly oblivious to Luna’s requests. Lucky for any-would be victims, it was only the two of them in the hall. Luna would likely have been shouting in her traditional royal Canterlot voice if it were not for her aforementioned tiredness.

“Discord,” Luna started again, her voice louder this time. “Could you ple-“

Luna was cut off by the massive double doors to the hall bursting open with a forceful kinesis spell, revealing an absolutely livid Princess of the Sun.

“DISCORD, SIT!” she bellowed, surprising Luna with the use of the traditional royal Canterlot voice that she had not heard her use since a millennium ago.

Discord himself also stopped, surprised for a moment, before rolling his eyes. With a snap he undid everything he had done and then proceeded to sit upside down, his head just barely above the floor as he sat with his legs crossed. He smirked as Celestia slammed the imposing and heavy doors shut with another kinesis spell.

“Now then,” she began, her voice restrained but no less intimidating. “I’ve sent Twilight Sparkle and her friends a message, so you had better have a good explanation as to why I don’t tell them to turn you back to stone the moment-“

“Nope.”

Celestia stopped for a moment before speaking again. “What was that?” she asked, the anger inside her having obviously spiked with that simple answer.

“I don’t feel like explaining myself twice,” he explained, snapping his fingers to summon a small scrub brush that he used to begin polishing his claws. “Besides, I’m sure they’ll be here soon.”

Celestia snorted as her face contorted into a scowl. By habit she trotted over to the spot by her throne that she usually stood at when addressing an audience. Doing so put her next to Luna, who had also done the same by habit. Celestia took a deep breath, held it for almost half a minute, then finally released it. Though she had calmed by quite a bit she was still noticeably angry. Luna shifted a few steps to the side away from her sister, not used to seeing her so frustrated.

Within minutes, but what felt like eons, a violet flash came and went in the middle of the grand hall, with six mares taking it’s place.

“Twilight Sparkle!” Celestia called with relief. “Thank goodn-!”

“Hey, the gang's all here!” Discord shouted with joy, dismissing the scrub brush in a flash and floating upright. With a snap several more flashes came and went and before anypony was able to stop it Discord had his paw around Celestia’s neck, his claw around Luna’s, and his tail wrapped around the six Elements of Harmony's midsections.

“Group hug!” he shouted, giving them all a squeeze. “How is everypony!?”

“Group hug!” Pinky Pie shouted in response, her forelegs raised in excitement.

“Discord,” Celestia scolded, her restrained voice dripping with menace as she glared at him.

Discord’s smile fell and he rolled his eyes as he sighed. “Party pooper,” he muttered. With another snap more flashes came and went, teleporting everypony back to where they started.

“Explain yourself, Discord,” Celestia commanded. “Just what are you doing here unannounced?”

“’Unannounced?’ I sent a message a week ago, which as I understand it is the minimum amount of time required for a meeting with royalty,” Discord replied indignantly.

“I didn’t get any message.”

“Really? Luna, are you doing this just to spite me?”

“M-Me?” Luna stuttered, obviously confused. “What role do I have in this?”

“You didn’t give your sister the letter like I told you to!”

“I received no missive from you! I have not even seen you since last year’s Nightmare Night!”

“Are you sure?” Discord asked with a sly grin, floating over to her. “Think back, one week ago today.”

“I would remember having met you.”

“Apparently not,” Discord replied, stopping just in front of the Night Princess. “Maybe I should give you a hint.”

With a snap and a he created a rolled up parchment.

“What are you doi-mph?” Luna asked before Discord quickly forced the letter into her mouth. She quickly spat it back out. “What is the meaning of this!?”

“Discord!” Celestia shouted, not taking kindly to the treatment of her sister.

“Wait for it,” he said in response, his sly grin not faltering.

“Wait for wh-?” Luna began, before stopping herself mid-sentence.

“Luna?” her sister asked.

Luna’s expression changed to one of confusion before her eyes widened with realization. A moment later her eyes widened further with shock just before her mouth opened in horror, her body beginning to shake.

“B-But how?” Luna asked, barely above a whisper. “How could you possibly…?”

“L-Luna?” Celestia asked, her worry obvious. “What’s wro-?”

“How could you possibly be there!?” Luna shouted at Discord. “That is my realm! Not even my sister has reign over it!”

“Why Lulu, me not being able to go there…” Discord began before his grin widened even further and he paused for dramatic effect. “Would make sense.”

“He was there…”

“L-Luna, what’s wrong? What did he do?” Celestia asked, nearly frantic.

The Princess of the Night slowly turned to face her sister, her body still shaking and her face still stuck in horror. “H-He… He…”

--

One week ago…

Luna surfed the dream plane as she did every night, watching over the ponies of Equestria and helping where she could. Thankfully, the many nightmares about Discord suddenly destroying everything had faded from most everypony, finally after nearly a year. More surprisingly was that Ponyville itself was the first to have those particular nightmares fade. Luna mused that it must have had to do with Discord’s frequent, but ultimately harmless, pranks. Ironically, the draconequus’ antics had made him seem like less of a threat in their eyes and more an annoyance.

She roamed the many dreams of the residents, quickly but carefully scanning each one to make sure nothing was wrong. This was actually the second time she had visited the dreams of Ponyville in one night, a routine she had begun to make since the trickster god’s arrival. One particular dream caught her eye, and she couldn’t help but smile. Pipsqueak, by far one of her favorite foals, was already dreaming about Nightmare Night again, sharing candy while also having fun with other ponies, herself being the focus.

“Aw, how cute. Looks like you’ve done well for yourself Lulu.”

“Yes, I suppose I-“

Luna stopped mid-sentence, realizing that she had not made herself known to Pipsqueak and that nopony should be talking to her. She turned her head to look to her side and saw Discord nonchalantly floating next to her, his trademark smirk on his face.

“W-Wha-mph!?” Luna tried to ask before having a rolled up parchment forced into her mouth.

“Give that to your sister, k thanks bye,” he quickly said before snapping and disappearing in a flash of light.

Luna spat out the letter. “What in-?”

“Wow!”

Luna turned back to the dream to see Pipsqueak hopping in joy as he gazed at her.

“Two Luna’s! This is the best Nightmare Night ever!” he shouted with glee.

“U-Um, indeed,” Luna stuttered. “W-What a surprise for me as well.”

“Let’s go Princess Lunas, the apple bobbing is starting!” Pipsqueak said before running off, the rest of his dream machinations following suit.

Luna hesitated a moment before following as well. What harm could come from indulging the young colt’s dream a bit?

“Still,” she muttered, “why did he dream about Discord doing that?”

--

Present…

Everypony just stared as Luna managed to recount her tale through her shaking and stuttering. Everypony, even Celestia, had their mouths hanging open in shock.

Discord simply smiled. “Your faces are priceless,” he stated, his tone full of glee.

“I feel… unclean,” Luna shuddered.

There was a moment wait before Celestia’s horn glowed with a magical aura and her eyes turned their cold and piercing gaze towards Discord. “You better have a phenomenal reason for doing all of this,” she threatened.

“Of course. You see Tia,” he began before placing the back of his claw against his forehead, striking a dramatic pose that would make Rarity proud. “I’m dying.”

The entire room went silent for a moment.

“What?” Twilight Sparkle finally asked.

“DISCORD! WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME!?” Fluttershy shouted, surprising everypony with the volume of her worried voice.

“I’m sorry Fluttershy, but there just wasn’t anything you could’ve done,” he stated in a still overly dramatic voice.

“B-But-!”

“You’re dying?” Celestia asked, no longer threatening the draconequus with magic, her expression now of sarcastic disbelief. “Of what, might I ask?”

“Oh, an absolutely terrible affliction! One I wouldn’t wish on anypony. Not even when I was trapped in that stone prison would I have even wished it upon you Tia! It’s that horrible!” he answered.

Celestia was a bit taken aback by that. Sure, she still didn’t completely believe him, but to say he wouldn’t even have wished it on her back when he was outright evil? That statement carried some weight to it.

“And just what would that be?” Celestia asked, a slight amount of worry in her voice.

Discord practically sprung forward, stopping only when his face was just inches from Celestia’s. “BOREDOM!” he shouted in a panicked voice.

There was a moment wait before the Princess of the Sun sighed, her face showing an utter lack of amusement. “Dying of boredom,” she stated. “Why did I think it would be anything else?”

“Oh, I completely understand,” Pinkie Pie interjected. “I couldn’t imagine how horrible it would be to bored all the time! I mean, what if I wasn’t able to have a good laugh!? Or worse, what if I wasn’t able to throw a party for somepony!? That would be awful!”

“Uh, sugarcube, nopony’s gonna stop ya from throwin’ them a party, so can we focus on what’s going on here if ya don’t mind?” Applejack politely asked after rolling her eyes.

“Okey dokey, lokey!”

“So you’re bored,” Celestia began. “Congratulations, Discord, you’ve found out how the rest of us live. What exactly do any of us have to do with this?”

“Plenty, but first I think I’d better explain how my boredom is different from your boredom,” Discord began, giving Celestia a condescending pat on the head.

Celestia rolled her eyes. “Enlighten us, please.”

“Of course. You see there’s quite a large difference between me being bored and you being bored in that you’re bored because you don’t have anything to do, while I’m bored because I can’t do the thing I want to do.”

“What do you mean ‘can’t’?” Celestia asked, her voice filled with worry.

“Well you see, as much as I’m enjoying myself now, I miss some of the things I did in the old days. The chaos, the manipulation, the twists and turns of trickery, the battle of wits. Maybe it’s just the nostalgia in me talking, but I happen to miss the days when I had someone to really compete against.”

Despite the nonthreatening tone of his voice almost everypony in the room responded as if the mad god was calling for a fight. Celestia, Luna, Twilight Sparkle and Rarity gathered magic in their horns, Applejack pawed at the ground and snorted, and Rainbow Dash took to the air, preparing to barrel down at the draconequus. The only two who didn’t react aggressively were Pinkie Pie, who was completely caught off guard at this turn of events, and Fluttershy, who gasped in terror at the scene before her.

“P-Please,” she stuttered. “Pl-lease, everyp-pony stop.”

“Discord, if you came here to tell us you are returning to your life of chaos and villany-“ Celestia began, her voice surprisingly angry.

“Oh come now Tia,” Discord interrupted, his smug smirk an island of calm in this sudden storm of aggression. “Do you really think I ‘d go through the trouble of getting myself an audience, waiting for the only ponies who could stop me to show up, and then announce some deviously evil plan right when I could be stopped?”

“It wouldn’t make sense, and that is your thing,” Celestia retorted.

“Now Tia, I thought you knew better,” he said, looking offended. “There’s a very big difference between not making sense and just being stupid.”

The tension held for a few moments more before, after exchanging glances between each other, Celestia and Luna backed off, dropping the spells they were preparing and assuming less threatening stances. The other ponies did the same soon afterwards.

“And what, may I ask, is keeping you from simply going back to your old self?” Celestia asked.

“Why, the same thing that got me to give it up in the first place!” he stated. Six flashes came and went, teleporting the six smaller mares in front of him and allowing him to hug them all at once. “Friends! We’re all friends, right girls?”

“Put me down before ah buck ya,” Applejack stated flatly.

“The best!” Discord said, his cheeriness not affected in the least by that threat. With another set of flashes the six ponies were put right back where they were before.

“So what? You want me to give you a Chaos pass? Allocate a time and a place for you to work off your desire for troublemaking?” the Sun Princess asked angrily.

Discord disappeared in a flash and reappeared next to her, draping one arm over her in a friendly manner. “Oh Tia, I’m disappointed in you. To think that I would ever suggest a solution that was so… orthodox.”

“So, what did you have in mind?”

“Sure, sure, I’ll explain,” he began, releasing his grip before floating some distance from her. “But first I’d like to ask you a question, Tia,” he continued, his expression calm but still unexpectedly serious. “You released me and wanted me reformed because you thought my magic could be used for good, yet even after I’ve taken up residence in Ponyville for about a year you’ve yet to ask anything of me. What exactly did you have in mind for me?”

Celestia looked a bit surprised by that question, something not helped by the fact that now everypony was staring at her. The Sun Princess closed her eyes and took a deep breath to relax before answering. “I intended you to be a failsafe for Equestria, an ultimate last resort. You have the power to alter reality itself and you’re one of the most intelligent and cunning beings in Equestria. Old threats, like King Sombra, have been returning. And who knows how many other new threats, like Queen Chrysalis and the Changelings, might be lying in wait.” Celestia opened her eyes before continuing, a look of regret clearly evident on her face. “Moreover, the invasion of Canterlot showed me how vulnerable we really are. Chrysalis’ schemes left her with enough power to defeat even me head on, and even the members of the Elements of Harmony failed. We escaped that disaster by the skin of our teeth thanks to Cadence and Shining Armor, and now they’re both off ruling the Crystal Empire.”

“So basically, you wanted me as giant reset button in case everything that could go wrong did go wrong,” Discord responded, summing up everything he’d heard.

“Well, I wouldn’t use such words, but yes.”

“Ugh,” Discord grunted, looking like he was about to gag. “That’s terrible! Honestly, Tia, I expected more from you! Did you really expect me to just wait around for everything to be ruined before acting? Really now, even I could think of a better plan than that!”

“Discord!” Fluttershy scolded, a surprising amount of anger in her voice. “You stop that right-!”

“And, as it just so happens,” he continued, his expression changing to one of smug satisfaction. “I have.”

For what felt like the hundredth time that day, everypony else fell silent and stared in disbelief.

“Pardon?” Luna asked.

Discord chuckled before teleporting over to Rainbow Dash. “Prepare to pay up, Rainbow.”

“’Pay up?’” the cyan pegasus asked, clearly confused.

“Don’t you remember our bet?”

“’Our bet?’ What be-“ Rainbow asked again before realization cut off her sentence. “Wait, that bet? But I didn’t bet anything!”

“Au contraire, my little pegasus, you bet your pride, and that’s worth plenty to me.”

“Rainbow Dash, just what is this bet he is referring to?” Princess Luna asked.

The rainbow maned pony hesitated for a moment before scratching the back of her head in embarrassment. “Uh, well, ya see it was about a week ago. I didn’t really think much of it at the time, but I bet that Discord couldn’t do anything outright good for anypony even if he tried.”

“And you intend to prove her… wrong?” Celestia asked the master of disharmony in disbelief.

Discord chuckled before floating up into the air. “Can I get a drum roll please!?” he shouted dramatically.

Pinkie Pie responded by pulling out a drum and a pair of drumsticks from who knows where.

“Pinkie Pie!” Twilight, Rainbow, and Applejack shouted.

“He said ‘please’,” the pink mare responded.

The other three mares simply groaned and rolled their eyes as Pinkie began.

“And here! We! GO!” Discord shouted, before spinning in mid-air, his body making the shape of a circle as he went. As he continued his own body began to shine brighter and brighter until finally there was a bright burst of light that everypony had to shield their eyes from. Despite this Pinkie Pie perfectly timed the end of her drum roll to this. Once the light settled down everypony looked to see a floating neon sign, the words “Discord’s Villain Reform Program” flashing in rainbow lights, with Discord’s own body as a picture made from neon tubes at the end.

“Tada!” he proclaimed, an unsettling notion as he was now a simply a collection of glowing lines.

“’Villain Reform Program’?” Celestia asked, completely confused.

Discord returned to his old form in a flash, the neon sign disappearing as he did.

“Oh Tia! You can read!” he exclaimed with condescending joy. “I’m so proud of you!”

“Discord,” Celestia began, her expression harsh and annoyed.

Discord snapped his claw and made a dog treat. “You want a snack girl? You want a snack?” he asked as if he was talking to a pet.

“Discord, could you at least be serious long enough to get your own point-?“

“Get the snack!” he shouted throwing it up into the air.

To everypony’s utter surprise Celestia’s mouth opened, seemingly against her will, and her tongue shot out extending a good few yards into the air to wrap around the treat, pulling it in and swallowing it in one swift movement. All of this happened over the course of a second.

Everypony simply stared, all of them wearing expressions of surprise and horror, none more than Celestia herself.

“P-Princess?” Twilight asked hesitantly.

“Sister?” Luna asked equally worried.

It was another minute or so before Celestia responded. “Well,” she began, trying to sound as normal as possible. “That was thoroughly horrifying.”

“Priceless,” Discord said with a satisfied smile.

“Discord!” Fluttershy scolded, being the first to fully recover.

“Ok, ok, I’m done,” he sighed. “Now, down to business.”

“Y-Yes, indeed,” Luna stuttered with her reply, trying to return to a more professional tone. “Explain this idea you have.”

“With pleasure. Fluttershy!” Discord shouted, pointing to the pink maned pegasus before teleporting over to her. “What exactly did we talk about last week?”

“L-Last week?” the shy mare stuttered.

“Yes, one week, exactly, seven days, what were we talking about?”

“Um… Well, there was Pinkie Pie talking about how to feed Angel Bunny more carrots.”

“Later than that.”

“Well, then there were those pranks you played on the others.”

“Which I’m still having nightmares about, thank you very much!” Rarity cut in.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Discord rolled his eyes and waved his paw dismissively. “Keep going.”

“Then there was when you apolo-“

“Yes, yes, after that!” Discord said quickly.

A smirk crept onto Flutterhsy’s face when she noticed the slight blush on Discord’s. She found it cute that he was embarrassed about having apologized to her. She decided to simply let it go and continue. “Well, then we were talking about when Twilight…”

Fluttershy stopped and her eyes began to widen in realization as Discord’s smile grew. “Yes?”

“…When Twilight defeated Trixie when she came back.”

“That’s it! That’s the one!” Discord shouted enthusiastically.

“Wait, what does Trixie have to do with this?” Twilight Sparkle asked.

“Oh it has less to with her, and more to do with you,” the draconequus asked, teleporting over to the violet alicorn and wrapping his clawed arm around her neck in a similar manner to what he did with Celestia.

“W-What do you mean?” she asked, obviously uncomfortable with the physical contact.

“I’m talking about how you beat her, Sparkle. Ingenious, really. Using some paint and family resemblance for “age changing” and “gender changing” spells. Simple, yet very effective. You may have the makings of a real trickster yet.”

“…Your approval fills me with shame.”

“Oh, don’t be like that. Besides you don’t anything to be ashamed about do you? You helped liberate Ponyville from a magic-crazed tyrant, and you did it by beating her at her own game. And you even got her to apologize after it was all said and done.”

“Heh, I guess it was pretty cool,” Twilight said, an embarrassed blush forming on her cheeks for a moment before she slipped back into a more antagonistic front. “B-But that’s beside the point! What does this have to this idea of yours?”

“Hm. Looks like for all your reading you aren’t very quick on the uptake, Sparkle,” Discord began, releasing the violet alicorn before floating a bit away. “You, Sparkle, have given me a wonderful idea on how to do some good in this world, and still get plenty of fun while I’m at it! After all, if you were able to trick a corrupted showmare into removing her own source of power, imagine what a pro trickster like me can do!”

“Wait a moment Discord,” Luna began. “You intend to use your skill in manipulation in order to reform others? That was your plan?”

“Is there a problem?”

“’A problem’?! Do you really expect us to simply allow you to go off on your own anywhere in the world and interact with any number of beings that you could recruit to cause chaos and mayhem, and expect us to believe your intent is to reform them!?” Celestia asked, shouting in exasperation.

“Of course not,” Discord said simply.

Celestia’s mouth hung open for a moment. “THEN WHAT WAS THE POINT OF-!?”

“Fluttershy’s coming with me!”

“I-I am?” the shy pegasus asked.

Before she had a chance to react Fluttershy was teleported into Discord’s arms. “Of course! Who better?” said giving her a friendly noogie. “Tia and Lulu would never let me go off on my own, but I don’t think they’d mind sending me off with the very mare who reformed me as my ‘parole officer’. That and I could use some company and somepony to bounce ideas off of.”

“U-Um, well-“

“Besides,” Discord continued, holding the peagasus out towards the two alicorn sisters. “How could they resist these faces?” he finished, adding his own sad-puppy face to compliment Fluttershy’s nervous cuteness.

Celesita and Luna exchanged glances for a moment, unsure of what to say. Discord had clearly thought this out, even picking out somepony to watch over him and make sure he stayed in line.

“Ignoring the question of whether or not you’ll stick to your word, there is also the question of what methods you would use in this scheme of yours,” Celestia argued. “Even for the sake of the safety of Equestria there are certain things we will not permit.”

“Like?”

“Brainwashing, for one,” Luna said.

“Pfft. Please, there’s no way I’d do that. It’d ruin the challenge.”

“Um, you did use it on me before though,” Fluttershy muttered.

Discord goaned. “Ok, ok, so I did have a bit of rage quit moment there, but it won’t be happening again. Like I said, I’m looking forward to a battle of wits like in the old days.”

“Moreover,” Celestia continued, “there is the question of coercion.”

“Well, I can’t promise there won’t be any of that, but certainly nothing long term. And before you complain, don’t forget that when you had me released you gave the six of the Elements back their jewelry in case anything got out of hoof.”

Celestia and Luna were quiet, as was everypony else. Obviously Discord had not spent his week simply waiting around.

“He’s surely thought of a way to refute every argument we could make,” Luna whispered to her older sister.

Celestia groaned for a moment and closed her eyes in thought. After a moment she opened her eyes and smirked. “It would seem so, but this might not be as distressing as we’re making it out to be,” she answered back.

“What do you mean, sister?”

Celestia’s smirk widened as she trotted towards Discord, stopping about a yard from him. “Alright Discord. Assuming you truly intend to use your powers and skills for the purpose you propose, and with the restrictions you have so graciously given, you have a deal.”

“WHAT!?” Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Twilight Sparkle shouted.

“Sister!?” Luna yelled.

“YAHOO!” Discord shouted in glee, tossing Fluttershy into the air and doing a backflip, thankfully remembering to catch the startled mare on the way down.

“With one amendment,” Celestia said.

“Ugh, WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?” Discord whined.

Celestia chuckled at the foalish complaint before continuing. “I want you to prove this little project of yours would be worth my time.”

Discord stopped for a moment before gently putting Fluttershy back on the floor. “Come again?” he asked, surprisingly serious.

Celestia’s smirk widened. She knew she had him now, and even if he knew it as well he certainly couldn’t help himself. “You heard me. You’re undoubtedly one of the world’s more cunning and crafty beings, but perhaps your time has passed. You were outdone by a simple mare who had nothing to her name but boundless kindness, and as you’ve already stated my student and her friends have already pulled off some impressive tricks. Despite your generous proposal, it seems like it’s hardly necessary.”

Discord snapped and summoned a candy cane. He placed it between his teeth and inhaled, the red lines on the confectionary treat receding as he did. He snorted and red smoke came out of his nostrils.

“They’re amateurs,” he said plainly. “They can’t do what I can.”

Celestia’s eyes narrowed. “Prove it.”

Discord inhaled again before eating the now completely white candy cane in one bite. He leaned in towards the Princess of the Sun, inches from her face, before snorting and exhaling a red puff right at her. To her credit, Celestia didn’t flinch.

“What’ve you got in mind?” he asked, his own trademark smirk appearing to match Celestia’s.

The alicorn princess backed off, turning away and taking a few steps from him. Her smirk still held.

“I want you to reform somepony that you think only you could. I want you to complete a task that you feel that not I, nor my sister, nor the Elements of Harmony could complete. That is my condition. If you can meet it, then I will sign off on your little ‘reform program.’” She turned to face the draconequus, her expression practically dripping with confidence. “I want you to impress me.”

Discord merely stood there for a moment before stroking his beard in a thoughtful manner. After a few moments of this he snapped and summoned a straw, a bag of popcorn, and a carton of milk. He pulled open the milk carton and reached in, snacking on solidified pieces of milk while using the straw to drink the popcorn. Discord strolled around the grand hall in thought, alternating between eating his drink and drinking his food for a few moments before he suddenly stopped in his tracks. He appeared to be in deep thought for a good minute and just stood there pondering. Soon enough his mouth widened into a truly terrifying smirk as he turned to the white alicorn.

“I think I’ve got just the one in mind,” he said in a dark tone before letting loose a maniacally evil laugh and disappearing in a flash.

“Sister, what have you unleashed?” Luna asked with a worried expression.

Celestia simply turned to her younger sibling with a comforting smile. “With any luck, the greatest asset Equestria and the world has ever had.”

Author's Note

Man, I really expected this to be done sooner. Took less time than the previous one, but still.

Anyway, this was by far my favorite chapter to write, having both Discord annoy the hell out of Celestia but also to have the two of them battle each other with words. I’ll be honest I haven’t watched enough of Celestia to get a good grip on her, but there have been plenty of comics that served as my inspiration as to how she acts around Discord, which the show itself has already stated that her history with him makes her act pretty out of character. But more than that I love it when elegant characters get flustered.

Enjoy the chapter everypony? Well hold onto your saddlebags, because I’ve still got one more chapter to add. It should be much shorter so with any luck I’ll have it done tonight (or rather, this morning). At least, that’s my plan, but don’t hold your breath.

Time for the home stretch! See you then everypony!

Epilogue: The First Contestant

“FOOL! DO YOU HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO REPORT!?”

“I-I’m afraid not, my Queen.”

“ARHG!”

The Changeling Queen slammed both her front hooves into the black stone of her throne room, cracking it.

It had been the same story for more than a year now, failed attempt after failed attempt to garner successful amounts of love for the hive. Due to the invasion of Canterlot the ponies had learned many methods to tell when one of her subjects had replaced a pony. They usually escaped, although there had been several reports of changelings failing to report back, likely being captured after being found out.

“Leave me and return to your duties,” Chrysalis commanded.

“Y-Yes, my Queen,” the drone stuttered. He bowed before exiting her chambers, leaving only the Queen and her personal guard.

The Changeling Queen rested on her throne, lost in her thoughts and her anger.

Even more than a whole year later the events of the failed invasion were swimming in her thoughts. To have been so close, to have bested Princess Celestia herself, to have Princess Mi Amore Cadenza at her mercy and Shining Armor under her control. And yet it had all come crashing down. She tried to think back to that day, to understand what went wrong, but all she could think of was the force of the new barrier that sent her and her subjects scattering to the winds. It had taken months to get them back to the hive, and it seemed that some had already been captured by the ponies by then.

She growled involuntarily. “Curse you, Cadence,” she muttered.

She had to distract herself, she was getting too angry for her own good. She instead turned her thoughts to revenge, more specifically what it would be like when it was complete.

An evil smirk crept onto her face as she imagined Celestia kept inside another cocoon, helpless to do anything but watch her kingdom fall around her. Of course she wouldn’t be alone, her sister Luna would be right next to her. Where the “Princess of the Night” had been during the invasion she didn’t know, but she would make sure not to overlook her and give her a chance to foil her plans. And then there was their latest princess, Twilight Sparkle who had exposed her and had put her disguise in jeopardy numerous times beforehoof. She would not escape her wrath either. And finally Cadence and Shining Armor, she would take exceptional pleasure in humiliating those two. Her grin widened further when she realized that having them at her mercy would mean she would’ve had to successfully conquer the mythical Crystal Empire. To have that land under her control would surely make her legendary.

“Heh. In time,” she muttered to herself. “In time.”

As she chuckled to herself she was suddenly blinded by a flash that appeared from nowhere in front of her. As her eyes adjusted she was stunned to find some sort of incomprehensible creature in front of her. The creature smiled before grabbing her horn with its paw.

“Queenwho’sgoingtolearnaboutloveandfriendshipsayswhat?” it said.

“W-What?” Chrysalis stuttered.

“Good answer!”

And with a flash the Changeling Queen and the mysterious creature disappeared. The two royal guards who had watched the whole thing simply stared at each other.

“What just happened?”

Within half an hour the entire Changeling Hive had been thrown into a panic.

Author's Note

Done within a few hours of the last chapter, woot! I actually managed to follow through on a promise for once!

To all those who read and reviewed this fic, I thank you. I’d also like to apologize for thins not being longer, as I had always intended this fic to be rather short, just to prove I could get something done. However, your fun as the viewer is not done yet! As I mentioned before, this fic was inspired by a series of comics, serving as a prequel to them. Just look up HowXu on deviantart to find them! And check out the rest of his stuff too, he’s really good.

Thanks everypony, and I hope you enjoyed the ride!