At Her Side
Preface:
"My Princess Luna!" I scream, but its too late, her sister… her sister has banished her. Though I fought hard and I fought for her, it seems I have failed my Princess Luna. Celestia turns to me. She must have heard me. There is nothing I can do. Even though I knew of the corruption of anger within my Princess, I sided with her. Even though I knew, one way or another, we would lose, I sided with my Princess. The victor is indeed Celestia, although I am sure it does not feel quite like victory to her. She does not hate her sister. Celestia's heart is too big for that. I look up at her.
"Can.. can you bring her back?" I know the ridiculousness of my question, but I cannot help myself.
"I'm afraid not. This is.. the way it has to be." Celestia speaks sadly. Her large eyes are full of tears. She turns and walks away.
"Wait! I am no true alicorn; I cannot merely wait for her to return! How can I protect her when…I'll be dead when she comes back. How can I protect her when I am six feet under solid ground, dead and gone?" I am a stallion, tough and strong and yet… I feel tears welling up. My heart is thrumming and it hurts. I am not sure what I am asking for..
"I understand, but I cannot grant you immortality. When Lunis- When Luna-” She stumbles on her words. She swallows before continuing. “When she comes back she will find a new guardian." Celestia says heartlessly, turning away.
"Who will want to protect her after a thousand years of hate and prejudice? No, I must be there for her!" I stomp the ground angrily.
"What would you have me do? I cannot change death itself; nopony can."
"I-I do not care. But please, Celestia, somehow I must be there for my Princess!" My words echo through the once glorious castle. It's in ruins now. Completely trashed from the battle. A battle… that I was not able to witness. I came too late. Far too late.
"Perhaps… perhaps I cannot change death, but I can change life. Unfortunately, the way I have in mind may completely destroy your memories as they stand now. If this works, you will only have the desire to protect Luna, once she returns, but you may not know why. In addition, you as an individual pony may change. It is not desirable, but could you accept this?"
"If it is for my Princess Luna, I will do it. Nothing can stand in the way of my duty… my feelings…” Tears stain my face painfully. They are full of magic; they sting unnaturally.
"It means leaving this world behind. All the ponies you know will be dead long before you and Luna return."
"I am adamant. For my Princess Luna, I will do anything." I am willing to sacrifice everything to be there for her. My friends, family, the Lunar Guard and all my companions… they will live long happy lives without me, but Luna… I am the only one who will brace her return, the only one who can.
"As you wish." I don't know what she's planning but she's going to send me to Luna. That's all that matters…right? Too late to second guess. Celestia raises her horn and works her magic. I close my eyes as I feel my body disintegrate...What is happening…I can not…..Luna….
Chapter 1
I open my eyes. It's really bright this morning. I really hate it when it's bright out. It just irritates my eyes. Which puts me in a worse mood than I'm normally in. Why the hell does Celestia make that sun of hers so bright? And it interrupted the most amazing dream… it was about a dark blue mare… something about her was so compelling.. so enlightening. I felt… quite attached to her. Until the morning's light woke me up and the greatest dream ever ended.
I roll out of bed, out of the light. Not that there's any point. I have no plans for the day. I have no friends. No job. I just don't know what I want to do in life. What's worse is I'm so ashamed of myself that I can barely let myself be seen in public. My cutie mark…I never got one. I never found my 'special talent'. Besides that, my unicorn parents disowned me as soon as I could take care of myself. They would have sooner if they'd had a better reason than the initial 'he's only an earth pony' problem. They never hated me, they just never loved me either. Being prestigious unicorns, the fact that their first born colt was only an earth pony was like putting beetles in their food; disgusting. I never minded, I mean, they told me their plan from when I was little. I never needed their love because I never learned what it felt like, never missed it.
So when the day came that they sent me on my merry way, I moved here to Ponyville. There's nothing special about the town, it’s just that none of the others seemed really special either. I kept coming back to this one. So they paid for the expenses of moving me here, gave me enough money for a few months' worth of living and left. I don't miss them. I just need something to do with my life. I’m ashamed of the fact that I haven’t found myself yet. That I’m pretty much useless. It’s not for the lack of trying, either. I've tried my hoof at all sorts of trades, working for the nearby Apple family with their extensive apple farm, being an artist, a construction pony…I even tried to help some mare with her boutique. I wasn't exceptional at any of them, and none of them made me 'happy'. None of them brought out my cutie mark either. They were interesting experiences, but not quite what I was looking for. After twelve different jobs, I stopped and started staying inside more. Whenever I do go out I wear a silk cloak to cover my blank flank. I'm not quite young enough for it to be normal anymore. I'm only a teenager, but still. I'm blank. That's unacceptable.
I hardly go out at all anymore. I like it much more inside, where it's dark and quiet and warm. I suppose… tomorrow I have to go out. There's the yearly celebration of the Summer's Sun event, where we celebrate the sun or something. Celestia is having it here, though I don't know why she'd host something so 'special' in such an unspecial town. I'm fairly certain there's a social protocol stating I really should go. I don't want to be viewed as that creepy pony that hides in his house all the time.
I grab my cloak. I might as well go out and see if I can help with any of the preparations. I do need some exercise and I'm not sure I want to get fat. One of the few things my parents instilled in me was respect for my body and its health. Of all the things they could have taught me, that seems to be the most prevalent. I'm not chunky yet, I should stay this way. I look in the mirror before heading out. I look like I think it's still Nightmare Night, what with my cloak, but it is necessary. My spiky dark grey hair will do its own thing. My black coat is fine. I'm presentable, at least.
The sun is even brighter directly than it was through the window. It's fine. My eyes quickly adjust. My goodness. Ponies are everywhere. Sprucing up their houses, cleaning the streets, decorating everything. I can't believe this is such a big deal to them. I'm a little surprised. Oh well, all the more reason to help. I'm sure I can find something I can help with…
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Well. That was a full day. I am tired. Completely wiped. And a bit upset. The world loves to mock me, doesn’t it? I know it was an accident on the filly’s part but still, it was so embarrassing for me. I was running errands, literally playing the messenger boy for some ponies, when an orange young pegasus filly came racing down the street on a scooter. I didn't have time to get out of the way, and she didn't react soon enough to dodge me. Long story short, my cloak ended up being…ripped. And while I was face down in the road, everypony saw my completely blank flank. To my great astonishment nopony laughed. They were all concerned with if I was injured. The local school teacher, Cherilee, I think her name was, scolded the orange pegasus and sent her on her way. Nopony mentioned my lack of cutie mark. Still, I was blushing red the whole time. Being a black stallion has its downsides, and the fact that nopony will ever mistake the fact that I'm blushing is one of them. As soon as I could, I trotted away as fast as I could without running.
Maybe being a blank flank adult isn't so bad. It's still embarrassing as all hell, but maybe I can live with it? Sitting here in my house by myself, I'm still feeling flushed about it, even though the event was hours ago. I've been sitting in my bed staring out the window, trying to live it down, and to no avail. The sun has set and it’s nighttime, and I naturally feel more at ease seeing the moon out. Staring at it, sometimes I feel like there's a pony up there, and she's my secret. Nopony else stays up this late to watch the moon, so it feels like I have her all to myself… Of course, that's entirely imaginary. There's no pony up there in the moon, and even if there was… I doubt she'd be up there for very long. How lonely it would be.
I need to go to sleep. The sunrise is special tomorrow, so I should be awake enough at dawn to actually enjoy it. Regretfully, I turn away from the beautiful full moon and bury myself under the covers of my large bed. In my sleep, I dream… And in this dream… I hear.
I'm coming back…
I'm coming back…
Tonight…
I'm coming back: TONIGHT…..
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I jump awake. That dream… that mare from yesterday's dream.. I saw her again but this time she spoke. She looked like…well, she looked like the moon personified. Just like what I was thinking before I'd gone to bed. Strange… I don't normally dream and when I do it's definitely not two nights in a row. And never with such unclear clarity…
Oh never mind that, I never ate dinner last night; that must be what gave me the wacky dream. No mare with such a mesmerizing voice would ever talk to me, so my brain must really be fried. Today is that 'special' Summer's Sun celebration. I should get ready. No cloak to wear, so I'll have to don only my bandana. Light brown and plain, besides my cloak, it is my favorite thing to wear. Now, it's the only thing I have to wear. If I can stay in the background of the celebration, maybe nopony will notice me. I can only try and hope. Its still dark out, so I have no fear of anypony seeing me now. I walk confidently through the town to the main hall, where all the town’s important matters are dealt with.
I notice that some ponies struggle in the darkness to navigate their life-long home. I find it funny that I am having an easier time after little more than a week's exposure to the town. I know it's just the darkness that hinders them, but I find it easier to walk in the dark than in the light. The light of the sun is so bright that it hurts more than helps. The light of the stars and the moon are adequate light sources, at least to me. In this darkness, I know the other ponies can’t see very far at all, so I have no fear. I walk up to a family.
"Would you like some help navigating in the dark? I can see perfectly fine, so if you would follow me, we'll be at the town square in no time." The mare nods thankfully and tells her children to stay close. One of the little ones bites onto my tail and follows the whole way attached to me. Its funny, I feel like I'm leading a parade.
Once we're inside I listen to them say their thanks and walk away. Soon the sun will be up, and my flank will be visible.
Everypony here is jolly. All friendly and excited and bubbly. From the back I can see almost everything. The balcony where the princess will appear and raise the sun for the longest day. The bird choir to the right. Every pony between me and the stage. All of it perfectly visible from my standpoint. Scanning the crowd, I see only one pony looks nervous in a bad way. She's a unicorn and she's purple. Automatically, I think of my mother, who is a pink shade away from lavender. But this mare is far too young, and much more appealing. If she weren't making such frowning faces, I'd say she's attractive. Or would be if I had any sense of romance or desire. Mares have come to me, but I've never gone to them. I don't feel the pull they do. Not so far into my experience with them.
The only reason this mare has attracted my attention for the moment is that she's not quite going along with the crowd. She looks tense, like something's about to explode. Wait, she just took a peek at the moon. I look up. The white orb is sparkling something fierce. I've never seen it do that. I look back at the mare. She's gritting her teeth while the Mayor speaks. The bird choir goes off. The curtains are pulled back. And Celestia isn't there. Her mouth moves, but I cant hear her. I'm way too far away and there's other ponies making a racket.
I look back at the moon. It's perfectly normal now. But back at the balcony… a dark pony stands.
My eyes widen. My heart stops. This pony…this mare… reminds me of the mare from my dream, only different. I can barely hear her words for the beauty of her voice. She… she calls to me, in a strange way. My heart… it hurts… as she mocks the crowd, she approaches a few ponies, gracing them with the touch of her mane.. how lucky they are. The purple unicorn interrupts. The hall is silent.
"I know who you are! You're the Mare in the Moon: Nightmare Moon!"
Mare… in the Moon? I was right in my fanciful imaginings, and there really was a pony in the moon? This… is impossible. I'm so fazed by this that I completely miss the next few sentences. I regain my thoughts when I hear Nightmare Moon declare:
"The Night will last FOREVER!"
Everypony scrambles. It's complete chaos. The purple mare runs out, followed by five others. I alone stand still. I'm thinking about what she just said. What's so bad about that? The sun and daytime are glorified, why not let the moon and the nighttime have a chance? I feel the need to get close to Nightmare Moon, feeling kinship with her. She dissipates into blue purple smoke and escapes the room. NO! I must see her! I must be near her! I must protect her!
I Must Be At Her Side!
