With Extra Frosting on Top

by Grey Faerie

Rating: teen
Tags: Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Romance, Discord, Pinkie Pie, Slice of Life, Main 6
Length: 31445

Pinkie goes on a diet to lose weight. She struggles with her new self over her old self.

Pinkie is tired of feeling like the fat one among her group of friends. So, she decides to go on a diet. Sounds simple enough, except when she has to battle sugar cravings, the origin of her food addiction, and her friends.

Rated teen for references to things of a sexual nature but no actual sexytime. Also alcohol and food disorders.
Cover picture by JayelleCartoons

Published 2013-07-22 04:00:05 UTC
Last updated 2016-01-20 07:58:27 UTC

Diet Water

The red and gold leaves were falling from the trees. A leaf fell from its tree and stuck into Pinkie's mane as she passed. Then it continued it's way to the street below. She happily noted that even though fall was coming, the nights were still warm.

Pinkie was bouncing down the street with her old friend Grey Faerie. Pinkie had known the grey unicorn since before she got her cutie mark. Grey Faerie now lives in the town next door to Ponyville, Whiterston.

They were scoping out the local scene for eligible colts. It was something they did every now and again.

"Ooo! How about that one! That looks good." Pinkie happily exclaimed. It would be their forth club of the night but that didn't curb Pinkie's enthusiasm. The flashing neon signs seemed to glow in time with the din coming from inside. Pinkie smiled at Grey and nodded her head towards the doors.

"Okay."

The bouncer was quick to let them in. Inside, they marveled at the display. The packed room looked to be painted a deep purple. Beams of light sprayed dots of white onto the air. It was like walking into a geode stone. The ceiling looked as if space had descended with patterns of constellations strewn about. Pinkie could see now the silver confetti falling onto the dance floor. Even Grey look around appreciatively. Her eyes shined as she looked at Pinkie and smirked. They decided to make their way past the crowd of dancers to the bar.

"What can I get you lovely ladies tonight?" the bartender asked.

"Ooo, I want the sweetest thing you've got!" Pinkie squealed.

"I would think you were sweet enough, sugar." The bartender smiled causing Pinkie to giggle.

"I'll have what she's having only cut the alcohol to a minimum. I'm the designated driver tonight."

"But you aren't driving," Pinkie said looking confused.

"It's a figure of speech."

"I thought Socrates was a figure of speech or was it Hermes?" Pinkie looked up and away thinking on it.

"No, love. They're figures known for speeches or in Hermes's case, god of speaking. I'm not talking about literal 'figures' of speech."

"Ohhh, silly me."

"Bartender, you might want to cut her off sooner than expected. She's already a little wasted."

"Hey! That's just my lack of educational nutrient. You can't really expect to learn much on a rock farm."

"Alright, alright. Hey, let's go check them out." Grey pointed to a pair of stallions sitting a few chairs down. Pinkie smiled and both strutted, with glasses in hoof, over to the boys.

"Why hello there," Grey started. The stallions looked up and noticed the two girls. They smiled back.

"Hello there cutie. I'm sorry I never noticed you. Did you and your fine friend just get here?" he grinned.

"Yeah! First time here. You come here often? How's the dance floor?" Pinkie replied. She and Grey took a seat at the bar. They casually leaned against it.

"Yeah, you can say that and the dance floor is hot. Much like yourself." he smirked back. Pinkie and Grey looked at each other and chuckled a little. They couldn't help the smiles and blushes from his corny pick up lines.

"Thanks. I love to dance. Do you?"

"If it's with a girl like you, I'm the number one fan of dancing."

The girls finished their drinks and all of them sauntered to the dance floor.

Pinkie jammed to the music. The DJ was great! He remixed songs and kept the energy going. The boys seemed to be more interested in simply watching them as they mostly just swayed to the beat.

"Hey! You want to get more drinks?" one of the boys called out, "I bet you'll be dancing on the bar before your third drink."

"You're on!" Pinkie called back. She made her way back to the bar and turned to them. "What do you have in mind?"

"Do you know what Absinthe is?"

"Wow, you're really starting hard aren't you? That won't make much of a bet now will it? Let's try something softer like vodka." Grey stared them down.

"What are you worrying about, Grey? It's not like you're going to be the one drinking it."

"I'm the one that will have to deal with you afterwards. I'd rather not have to figure out how to carry you home."

"Don't you worry about that. I could carry her back to my place. It's not too far," the stallion answered.

"Thanks, that makes me feel so much better," she cut back. "Try the vodka."

The stallion's face had fallen but he regained himself and agreed.

"You've picked the wrong girl. I'm a farmer's daughter. I can hold my stuff." Pinkie puffed out her chest.

It in fact, took five drinks before she felt brave enough to jump on top of the bar to dance. It took Grey a little bit to coax her down. The stallions didn't fare as well and were passing out on a couch. The bartender had to cut them off early so they wouldn't be too drunk to get home. It was a safety issue. The girls sat at a table with waters to sober up.

Pinkie put her head in her hooves. "We've been to four different clubs and still no luck! How hard is it to find one decent guy?"

"For you? Very," Grey Faerie explain with her own head leaning on her hoof. "Guys only see you as a fling. A crazy party girl to get drunk and bring home for the night."

"I hate that! Just because I like to have fun they think I'm easy. It's just so... I hate it. I'm tired of not having a boyfriend," Pinkie said. It had been a year since she had had any type of boyfriend. And while this shouldn't have been such a big deal, she had started to feel pangs of loneliness. Love was something she always held highly. Not having anyone special to share it with was depressing.

"Maybe we should call it a night," Grey Faerie said. "I'll walk you home."

"Okay." Pinkie giggle. "Ahh, you're walking me home. How responsible of you."

"Yes, like any true gentlecolt. I shall walk the inebriated lady to her bed safely," Grey Faerie stated with a strut in her step. She always spoke in a slight drawl. Sort of like a Canterlot pony but without the snobbishness. She spoke slowly, stretching out the words and sometimes even leaving pauses in between her words with an intact of breath.

"Hey! I'm not that drunk. I can hold my liquor quite well," Pinkie smiled back at her.

"Quite," Grey resounded. "Quite evident on that part. You did out drink most of the guys we met. Though I would of have enjoyed it more if you didn't drink so much of some of those drinks. Alcohol does have a lot of calories. And fat in some cases. I wouldn't want you to become too unhealthy. Especially with how you eat most of the time," She said.

"I know, I know. Thank you for your concern," Pinkie said lovingly.

They arrived in Ponyville well after midnight. Pinkie hugged her friend goodbye and safe journey home. She continued up to bed. While she didn't have work the next day, that would have killed her getting up so early, she did have some errands to do.

Pinkie opened her eyes the next day and sat up in bed. She stretched her arms above her head and yawned. Pinkie looked over to her nightstand to find her sunglasses. She planted them on her face and moved over to the dresser mirror. The long stokes of the brush put her hair back into a manageable poof. She walked to the bathroom and gulped down some aspirin along with a few glasses of water. She looked longingly back at the bed but duty led her to walk down the stairs.

"Good morning, Pinkie!" Mr. Cake called out cheerfully.

"Oww, can we put the happy on hold for a while. I'm still recuperating from the mounts of fun last night."

"Ohh! Sorry," he said quieter. "Haha, so you enjoyed yourself last night? Maybe a little too much with that friend of yours?" he asked.

Pinkie smiled. "We were responsible. No need to worry. And no, we didn't have too much last night. I just got in really late."

She smiled at the fatherly look she got from him. It always made her happy to know the Cakes cared about her like a daughter.

She went into the kitchen and got two blueberry muffins for breakfast. She finished them off with a glass of orange juice.

"Good morning, Pinkie," Mrs. Cakes said. She had noticed the glasses and was mindful of her headache. "What are you up to today?"

Pinkie was blowing raspberries with the kids. She looked up and replied, "Ohh, I promised Fluttershy I'd help her with shopping. Then I need to go to Rarity's and act as her model. She wants to see how the clothes move."

"Ok, well have fun." Mrs. Cake said.

"I will." Pinkie giggled.

"BUT NOT TOO MUCH FUN! YOU HAD ENOUGH LAST NIGHT." Mr. Cake called from the other room.

Pinkie and Mrs. Caked laughed. "Of course not! Most bars don't open until after noon!" she replied.

He just rolled his eyes and shook his head. Pinkie waved goodbye as she walked out the door. The cool wind was blowing through the changing leaves. It would still be a few weeks until Pinkie could enjoy jumping on the crunchy leaves. She walked towards the market square to wait for Fluttershy.

She settled down in the shade of the bookstore to wait for her friend. It was a few minutes later that Fluttershy appeared.

"Heya, Flutters! How's it going?" Pinkie asked.

"Hello, Pinkie, I'm good. If you don't mind me asking, why are you wearing sunglasses?"

"Ohh, it looked sunny today. So! Where do we go first?"

"Well," Fluttershy said pulling out her list, "I need vegetables, some medicine, a few books, and blankets. If that sounds like too much for you to carry, I can put it off and asks someone else. If that's what you want?"

"Haha! I'm not as weak as I look Flutters! I'm tougher than a hard tack biscuit," She said flexing her arm.

Fluttershy giggled softly, "Ok."

They had gotten through a good half of their shopping when Pinkie had begun to really notice the looks her friend was getting. It might have been because of her own desire for those types of looks that made her aware of it. Almost all the colts they had come across had looked to admire Fluttershy. Either by stealing glances or by showing her more kindness. They would murmur about the dainty way she walked. About the way her long hair flowed. It was all understandable Pinkie reasoned. Fluttershy was beautiful. She had modeled professionally even! Doesn't matter that she had hated it; she had done it.

It was those double takes and the way Fluttershy was treated that made Pinkie aware of the lack of attention she got. It was strangely antagonizing. She was used to getting a lot of attention. She was the number one party pony in all of Ponyville and maybe even most of Equestria! And she wasn't much of one to be jealous of her friends. She enjoyed their happiness. She was glad when they had something she didn't because it meant they had something special to brighten their day.

Her budding feelings of jealously bothered her. She tried to shrug it off and continued with the shopping.

"Thank you Pinkie, you were a lot of help today," Fluttershy told her. They had gotten all the shopping done. Pinkie had ended up carrying a good majority of it but she had expected it. Fluttershy wasn't as strong as her and she was a Pegasus. That made her naturally lighter and less sturdy than Pinkie's Earth Pony body.

"Your welcome! It was fun hanging out with you. Call me anytime you need a shopping cart hehe." She laughed.

"Ok," Fluttershy said smiling, "I'll see you later."

Pinkie skipped down the dirt road away from Fluttershy's cottage and towards Rarity's house. Her face was stamped with a wide smile. She was looking forward to trying on all of Rarity's wonderful clothes. It was a real treat to get dressed up in something so fancy.

When she got to the house she burst right in with an exuberant "HELLO RARITY!" and as expected Rarity jumped a mile in the air.

"Ahhhh! Ohh, hello, Pinkie. That was quite a scare. I do hope your not going to be doing that too often," Rarity hinted.

Pinkie laughed. "No, not often, but enough to keep you on your toes! Oooo, are those the dresses I'm going to wear. Squee They're so pretty! and sparkly!"

"Why thank you darling. I spent almost all of this morning working on them. Now, up you go on the pedestal. I need to see how they look on you."

Pinkie bounced up onto the stand and stood still as Rarity put the first dress on her. It was a little uncomfortable in some places.

"Well... I didn't grunt think it ah would fit so... snugly," Rarity said. "Hold still while I, let it out a little." She then went to 'let it out a little'.

"Hmmm, I think we might have to pass on this one. Here try this one on," Rarity said as she helped Pinkie out of the first dress. "I would have to take that one apart to... fit someone so..."—she paused to find the right words—"I know what it is. I made these with Nobles in mind. Not a hard working girl like you."

Pinkie just nodded. She didn't need Rarity to say it to know what she meant. Pinkie tried on the other dress with as little luck as the first. The others didn't fit well either.

"You know what. I don't even need these done for quite a while. I shouldn't have rushed it. Here, let's try out these hats and scarfs. The fall fashion season is going to be in full swing soon and it would be wise to be ready with the right accessories," Rarity said with a flourish.

Pinkie slouched as she shuffled home. Rarity tried to make her feel better about the incident with her fall clothing but it wasn't the same. She had looked forward to dressing up in those wonderful clothes. Now she felt like dirt. This incident also brought forth what had happened this morning with Fluttershy.

When she got home, she found a note from the Cakes saying they had been invited to a play date and would be back tonight. Pinkie smiled at this; thinking of the fun the twins were having and the Cakes getting a rest from work. She walked over to the fridge and pulled out a plate of cake, a cup of left over frosting, and a tub of ice cream. She went up to her room and set her sun glasses back on the night stand. She then proceeded to eat her dinner.

I don't get it. Why is it Fluttershy gets so many looks and I, her friend, doesn't? She doesn't even want the attention. Maybe that's it! It's because she doesn't want it... she... gets it? No, no, no, that doesn't make any sense. Aren't I just the same as her? Shouldn't I get attention from just being around her?

Pinkie's short train of thought was stopped by her spoon hitting the bottom of the ice cream tub. Her eyes widened. She looked around and realized she had already finished everything.

What? But that was a whole cake and a new bucket of ice cream. I... She looked at herself and it struck her. I'm... fat. That's why. She threw her spoon down and jumped up. Of course! Gaa! I should have realized it. Especially after today at Rarity's shop. I'm just... why would anyone look at me when I'm just a comparison to to... highlight how unlike Fluttershy I am. I show off how thin and pretty and ladylike she is! I'm just loud obnoxious and... Fat.

Pinkie sniffled hard and scrunch her eyes closed. She began pacing back and forth. This is it. I'm tired of it! I want to be the pretty one. I want to be the one guys want to talk to and not because they think I'm easy or... stupid.

She stood in front of her mirror but quickly looked away.

She let out a breath. I'm going on a diet. And not just that. I'm going to change. By the end of it I'll be thinner and with a proper boyfriend. She smiled to herself.

First off, she thought looking around, is the hardest part. Changing how I eat.

She felt sick thinking about all the unhealthy things she just ate. All the calories and sugars. She wanted it out of her. But instead, she cleaned up the remains of her meal and prepared a list. If she was going to change, she need to write down what she needed to do.

It was still a little early for it but she went to bed. She was tired from her day and the hangover she had nursed. Sleep eventually came.

Cold Turkey

Pinkie woke up the next day and groaned. She was not looking forward to the changes she was about to make. She started her daily routine stumbling over to brush her mane and using the bathroom. She then went back to her room and grabbed the list off her nightstand. She threw her bags on making sure her wallet was inside. She stopped at the top of the stairs and took a breathe. Breakfast was going to be her first challenge.

The Cakes greeted her as she walked down the stairs onto the main floor.

Pinkie grinned and replied with her greeting as she made her way into the kitchen to get something to eat. She strained to look away from all the sweets around her. She went to the pantry and grabbed a box of cereal. Pinkie filled her bowl half way and put the box back. She then got an orange and a glass of milk. It wasn't anything really 'diet crazy' but it was better than muffins.

"Is that all you'll going to be having?" Mrs. Cake asked surprised.

"Yea, I don't feel that hungry this morning. I guess I'm not awake yet," she replied with a smile.

Strange, Mrs. Cake thought, but she shook her head and smiled anyway. "Now Pinkie, do you remember what needs to be done today?" she asked.

"Yes, around one you guys are leaving, and I'll be watching the shop until six. During that time, I have to get the Miller's order done."

"Yes, please remember that. It's very important."

"Of course! I'll get started on it when my shift starts."

Pinkie finished her breakfast. She cleaned up, then went over to where the twins sat eating their Oat O's. She tickled them under their chins.

"I'm going out. I need to get a few things," Pinkie said.

"Okay, where are you going?" Mr. Cake asked.

"Not entirely sure. I have a list of a few things I want. I'll have to look around to see who has what I need. Well, I'm off. See you later!" she called as she left. The Cakes waved her goodbye.

Pinkie walked down to the market place to go back to the bookstore she waited outside of the day before. Once there, she looked at her list:

Things to Get

books on proper eating habits

cookbooks on healthy eating

healthy food listed in books

exercise books

exercise stuff from inside of books

Wow, do I really have so little knowledge on this? She thought as she flipped through a book.

Pinkie prided herself on knowing about certain things, especially with her amazing memory. But it was only now that she realized she didn't know how to even begin to eat healthy except to eat less and no sweets. I wonder if I can have any sweets. Or is it once in awhile, or was it certain ones? I really don't know, she sighed.

She continues to wander around for the books she needs. It ended up taking longer than she thought. There were so many different books; some even contradicting each other! In the end, she felt she got three good books, Healthy Food and You, Burn your Body (And Calories!), and The San Fratello Diet. It was now time to scout out the items listed in the books.

Pinkie went to the fitness store, Plots and Flanks. She decided it would be best to get the weights later when she had the cart. Pinkie got some of those stretchy bands and an exercise mat. She had a wooden box at home she could use for aerobic exercises. She also had a jump rope and a hula hoop. She smiled at the thought of having some fun when working out.

After checking out, she made her way to the market. She knew she would be needing to stock up on her own supply of food. Plenty of fruit to help curb her sweets cravings. But also vegetables, as that's what she will be eating most of the time. It was unfortunate, but most of the books had her cut out bread. She cringed at the thought of it.

It was around noon that Pinkie made it back home. She used the side door to get to the stairs and went up to her room. Pinkie looked around her room and pursed her lips. She had to rid the room of all her junk food. There were candy wrappers everywhere. Emergency cupcakes and the smell of baked goods permeating the air. She grimaced.

For the next half hour, she rushed around pulling out all her junk food. Her hooves shook as she threw out a box of new candy bars. Pinkie looked over her shoulder to the spot she just knew had another cupcake. A perfectly good strawberry swirl cupcake for those times when she was reading a book and needed a snack. It make a disheartening plunk on top of the box of candy bars. Every secret spot was exposed one by one. Her lip trembled as she felt suddenly very shy. These weren't special sweets just for her. They were a dirty little secret tucked in where no one else would look.

Pinkie threw the bucket under her arm and went down stairs to the dumpster. She stopped for a moment next to it. The smell of the treats was so tempting. Pinkie clinched her teeth, held back a few tears, and tossed it in. She went back up and shoved her stuff around to make room for an exercise area. She put her new food in every spot her old used to hide. There was no sneaking treats anymore.

Pinkie sat back against the wall. The shelves that once held chocolate bars and sweet breads now held diet books. The healths bars she had now could only pretend they were candy bars. She closed her eyes to sigh. Even the smell had changed. Pinkie knew she had to get everything in order while she had the will power to do so. 'Change is always easier to do things the first few days.' or so the books say. The sound of the clock ticking away reminded her of the other pressing issue in the room. It was almost time for work.

At one, Pinkie waved the Cakes goodbye and started her shift. She felt a bit of luck on her side as she had taught herself long ago not to snack on the product during her shift. It added more to her work load than already had.

Pinkie tied on her apron and set about working on the Miller's order. It was a set of five cakes for a dinner party they were having that night. She smiled at the thought of a party. The chocolate batter always got her salivating. And chocolate frosting too! Pinkie snapped into attention right before she took a swipe of the leftover frosting. She bit her tongue and threw the bowl under the running water of the faucet.

She was saved with distraction on a few occasions when a customer would come in. Pinkie popped some gum in her mouth in hope that it would help. By the time four o'clock came around, she had a pit in her stomach from hunger. The stupid gum just seemed to make her even hungrier! Pinkie locked the front door and flipped the sign. She breathed in the fresh air of the market. It was nice a break from the constant smell of the bakery. Granny Smith smiled at her from the apple stall.

"Hiya, Granny Smith! No Applejack today?" Pinkie beamed. She bent down to inspect some of the yellow apples.

"Hello, Pinkie. No, she's out, busy helping our neighbor with milking their cows. Ya might she her later if she passes by with the delivery to the grocer." Granny Smith was sitting on a stool besides the baskets of fresh produce. Pinkie picked three apples and paid.

"That sounds fun. Tell her I said hi. See ya later!"

"See ya later."

Pinkie chomped down on the apples. It might have been luck that Applejack wasn't here today. She didn't feel ready to see anyone yet in case they could some how know just by looking at her that she was on a diet. She had a nagging feeling they would laugh at her if they found out. Pinkie shook her head to clear the thought. There were a lot of things she didn't need to think about right now. Her friends were great but there were just somethings she didn't share with them.

Pinkie finished up the rest of the day with a sense of ease now that she wasn't so hungry. She untied her apron and hung it on the coat rack nailed to the wall. She felt the tinges of hunger again so she went up to her room to get an orange. Going to the fridge would run the risk of seeing all of the numerous sweets in there.

Pinkie laid on her bed. The cakes had smelled so good, the frosting was gourmet, and all of the fruits for the pies had to be made with their own syrup. Then to waste all that gourmet frosting. Pinkie looked over at her orange peels. I can do this. It's only the first day! She pressed her hooves to her face.

Pinkie was relieved when the Cakes came back home at six. They closed up the store so they could have dinner which Pinkie volunteered to make. Normally, she only had to do it if the Cakes were out or too busy, but she told them she wanted to try her new cookbook so Mrs. Cake relented.

Look at it this way, so far, I've been doing pretty good. Pinkie smiled to herself from across the dinner table. I got through the first day without any major problems.

Pinkie grabbed a portion of pasta then put some back but then that was too little so she put some more on but then that was too much. Wasn't she not supposed to have too many carbs? So she put some back. She pouted at it until the bowl with the string beans came around. She would have happily dumped it on her plate but then that would be too much. In the end, she had a scoop of the beans, some noodles, and no dessert. The empty plate looked so much more barren afterwards then it normally did.

This whole thing didn't go unnoticed by the Cakes who gave her worried looks all through out the meal. Pinkie smiled and bid them goodnight. Mrs. Cake sighed and patted her husband's hoof. If there was something wrong, they were sure Pinkie would say something.

That night, Pinkie went to bed with a calm smile on her face. She even started to giggle at herself for getting all worked up over nothing. Tomorrow, she will be starting her workout sessions. Soon, she thought as she drifted to sleep, I'll be thin, happy and, hopefully, in love.

Author's Note

*For those that didn't get the Spongebob reference, Plots and Flanks is a parody of Buns and Thighs.

The Cravings

Pinkie had read in one of her books about keeping a food journal to track what she eats. She decided it'll be fun to try it and had gotten a bright pink glittery journal just for the task. She even had a pink glitter pen to go along with it! Pinkie had been surprised Plots and Flanks had something like that in stock.

Day Two of My Diet

Note to Self: Come up with super awesome secret name for diet. Something like The Canterlot Project or Pantry Area 51. Ohhh, those are good. Or maybe how to become the prettiest mare around and get all the stallions! It was a lot harder today to resist than yesterday. I had two pears with my cereal just so I wouldn't have any muffins. They are soo good. The Cakes sure do make the best muffins around.

And then today at work, I was baking some pies, and I kept thinking, I want it I want it i want it. But I didn't, I was good. Ok journal time!

Breakfast:
Two pears, a cup of milk, (we don't have anything but whole), and half a bowl of cereal. the whole ~~gran~~~~i~~y grainy one
Lunch:
Fresh green salad, with salsa instead of dressing even though dressing is soo good :)
Ok I snacked:
One cookie, just one! I swear. And it was oatmeal. So I think I did good.
Dinner was good:
Mashed Potatoes and ~~vegatable~~ soup. Vegetable. Not gravy, ohh but I love gravy. So does Grey Faerie. Probably more than me even.

Goodnight journal!
Pinkie Pie

Day Three

It was harder today only because I was helping Fluttershy again. I'm still a little jealous of her. Don't tell her. We were walking around the market for more supplies, and we saw Applejack. She was selling these really good looking apple fritters. She was surprised and maybe a little worried when I declined but I had to be good. It's only the ~~three~~ third day! I remember Grey had told me she would drink coffee when she was hungry but mostly tea. I don't really want tea. It's the same as filling up your stomach with water and I've done that plenty enough times. I like the idea of coffee though. The milk or cream is what will fill me and the coffee will help with suppressing my hunger. Only thing is, I've got to drink plenty of water. And brush my teeth a lot. Don't want smelly coffee breath. And I could chew gum. No, that just makes my stomach hurt.

Breakfast: Cereal (I'm getting tired of it already, I'm going to need to get something different real soon) a grapefruit, but I didn't eat it, I forgot how bad it tastes without sugar, and a cup of juice, I forget what kind
Lunch:Veg~~a~~etable wrap from Field Fresh, it was really good and healthy especially since the books say not to eat out too much
Snack: A banana, haha that's fun to write when does the nana's stop anananana
Dinner: I realized I shouldn't have had the potatoes yesterday, butter is not my friend, Ohh just realized Buttershy-Fluttershy and she's yellow! Haha but probably doesn't taste as good. I don't think I should really be saying that. Eating ponies, ewww.
Leftover stew from last night and biscuits but I didn't eat them. Mrs. Cakes asked why and I had to lie to her that I ate a lot with Fluttershy or simply that we had ordered food, and I ate most of it. I feel really bad about it but I don't want them to know. I don't know why. Maybe I'm embarrassed.

I hate to admit it but I couldn't help but think bad things about my friends again. Things like 'Why does she get all the attention? Hey! I'm right here!' I don't want to think that way. But it's so hard not to. I'm used to being the center of attention but not in that way. I hate it.

Goodnight Glitter Journal, Pinkie Pie :)
P.S. My diet's code name is Pink Balloon Away.

Day Four

I hate you, I loath you, there is no way to express my unlike of you. I'm so sorry Glitter for starting off so badly. I'm just SOO TIRED right now. And sore. I haven't been writing it down but I've been exercising, which makes me hungry. And I can't eat as much anymore. I had some apples but it wasn't the same! I need sugar! Refined, processed sugar! Or sweets of some kind. Like candy or a doughnut. And as if trying to break my eating habits wasn't hard enough, I go to work where I have to deal with looking at cakes and pastries all day!

There was a birthday party today. I was able to distract myself by making sure the guests had the best party ever! It was sooo much fun! Thinking about it makes me feel better. I think it helps when there's a really good reason (like it's not mine) not to eat cake, candy or drink soda.

But then the party ended and I had to clean up. Luckily they took the leftovers but, the cake left on the plates made me feel bad. How could they so easily leave so much food untouched?

Breakfast: Just fruit today, forgot to get new cereal
Lunch: A daisy sandwich I made myself
Snack: Coffee, I was tired
Dinner: Pasta, I had to have some. I couldn't just say no. I tried not to have too much though. I feel sick.

Your very cranky author, Pinkie Pie

Pinkie looked up from her journal and sighed. She frowned at the thought of what a couple of stallions had said about her. She turned back to her journal and put pen to paper.

I came across a new word today. Not a fun one either. Apparently, there's an word called DUFF. During the party, one of guests had said it about me. They said 'Hey, isn't that Rarity's friend?' 'Yea. Not really the kind of pony you would think she would hang around.' 'Well you know what the say, there's always one DUFF in a group of friends.' then they laughed. I didn't know what that could mean. I didn't even know if I had heard it right. So I called up Grey Faerie. She said it means the Designated Ugly Fat Friend. It's used to describe that one ugly or overweight girl in a group of friends. It's also used to mean that one ugly friend a pretty girl hangs around to make herself look even better in comparison. She had asked me how I came across it, I lied, saying it was on a book cover.

I'm used to ponies making comments about my weight but that stung. It made me worry too. Was that the reason some of my friends hung around me? They obviously don't need me, and they all had something to compare to me. Looks or work ethic. There was at least one thing to make themselves look better in comparison.

Grey asked if I was free this coming Saturday to go to The Cantering Stallion. I said yes. I think I need to get away from everything and just have fun. This diet thing is starting to stress me out. And when I get stressed or upset, I eat. I had found myself reaching for some leftover cake after the phone conversation. I had to force myself not to eat any. Instead, I gorged myself on carrots. It was horrible.

Day Five, Friday

There's just so much! It's like it's closing in on me. Trying to tempt me. I had to get out of the shop. Away from the market. It's too much! Food everywhere and I just want to eat it. Every time I look around, I think back to those nights when I would lay awake from hunger. The thin turnip soup wouldn't be enough to drive away the pangs. Now, there's too much. ~~Just soo much~~

How would they feel if they ~~new~~ knew that I was refusing food when it's there? Not clearing my plate when before I would lick the bowl hoping for more. I couldn't sleep last night. The wind feels nice on my skin but inside I feel all torn up. I just want to be blown away.

I had the day off and normally I would spend it with my friends but I couldn't. It just makes me feel depressed. I don't feel like I can look at them right now.

I don't want to look at food. It makes me feel like working out, a lot. To make up for all the bad things that I've eaten up until now. But I know how stupid that is. And I'm sore from just what exercises I've been doing. I could feel muscles I've never knew before getting sore. It was all very different from my normal work out or when I entertained the twins.

Oh, forgot to mention earlier, I got the weights today. Just a set of five and ten pounders. I hate them already. But muscle burns more calories and strength training helps with keeping the weight off. I'm starting to feel proud of myself. Just as long as I can resist these stupid sugar cravings.

Pinkie Pie
PS I didn't feel like writing down my food though I know I should.

Day Six Saturday

I hadn't realize how bad alcohol was! Well, I knew it was bad but not that it had so many calories in it. Grey was right about it. I looked it up and beer is like fat in a can. Some of our other drinks were just as bad. I can't believe I would chug that down like no tomorrow. I'm going to be good anyway because I don't want to get too drunk. I don't want to feel sleepy when Chester gets on stage. Grey likes him best because he lets her watch him make-out with his boyfriend. Gosh, she's so rotten.

I had some really good cereal today. I had remembered to ask Mrs. Cake to pick some up. That makes it a lot easier on me. I didn't have to go to the store, and I don't have to eat some icky diet food. For lunch, I filled up on a veggie burger. They're really good. I've got to be going. I'm leaving soon to hang out with Grey until show time. It's always fun to dress up in the sexy clothes she has. Makes me feel good. ;) Talk to you later GJ. :D

Pinkie was breathing hard. She had to calm down but it tore her up. How could she be so weak? How can she have done what she did after the first horrible deed? She swayed and put a hoof to her head to steady herself. She had drunk too much and wasn't feeling good.

Pinkie had been hungry after getting home. She didn't realize until it was too late that she was eating her second cake. The sudden thoughts about her diet stressed out her already strained stomach and had her racing to the bathroom. She had eaten those cakes like second nature. It was too much.

Her mind started to wonder as she stared out from against the cold bathroom wall. Isn't this easier? You could have everything you want. You can literally make you cake and eat it! Pinkie recoiled from her own thoughts. No, that's wrong. What I doing?

That's it, I need ~~help~~ support. I need the support of my friends and family. If Grey Faerie knew, she would be soo mad. No beyond, she would be pissed. She ~~was~~ is always so right about things. She likes doing things the right way. The healthy way. She would ~~have~~ support~~ed~~ me in the way I've been doing the diet so far but this? I should tell her as well about my diet but I know how she will be. I don't want her to worry about the worst possible out come but mostly I don't want her to check up on me. I just know she will see right through me.

Pinkie Pie

Pinkie closed the book. She looked at it unsteadily. She hated the words she puts down. No one should know these things. She turned and stared at her bed. The morning was going to be rough. Pinkie rubbed her face before crawling over and into bed.

Why? Why did she have too much? Why does she always have too much or too much? She knew the answer to the why but she wouldn't tell. Pinkie shivered, in the end, she couldn't help but feel that some part of her was unraveling.

Author's Note

*I actually did get DUFF from a book cover. I never got the chance to read it but it looks good. It's called The DUFF.
*This refers to how girls that like yaoi or boy/boy shipping are called Fujoshi or "rotten girl". Fujoshi (腐女子?, lit. "rotten girl") is a self-mockingly pejorative Japanese term for female fans of manga and novels that feature romantic relationships between men.

Gooey Stuff

I was so sure I wasn't going to be feeling well today but I feel kinda good. Especially since I never feel anything akin to good after a night out with Grey Faerie.

Pinkie got up and instinctively slipped on her sun glasses. Her feet stumbled a little from under her as she made her way to the dresser and brushed her mane out. Pinkie rubbed her eyes for the third time as she walked to the bathroom. She brushed the taste of last night out of her mouth before going back to her room.

Hmm, I probably don't really need my sunglasses today. Pinkie pushed them up on her head and went to the window.
Then she opened the curtains.

"Ahhhhh!" she yelled pulling the curtains closed. "Celestia, turn off the sun!"

"Pinkie! Everything okay?" Mrs. Cake called out.

"Yeah! Fine!" Pinkie moved the glasses back in place. She might have been feeling good but even a small hangover was still a hangover.

She then left the room to go downstairs. Pinkie was walking down the stairs when she was stopped frozen. The memories of last night came back full force. The horrible things she had thought, the writing it down, the going to bed feeling unraveled. Pinkie sat down on the stair step. Her face was a blank facade to what was going on inside.

How can I even think about feeling good when I'm so bad? How could I even deceive myself into thinking I can do this? I've lived so long having such horrible habits that it's obvious that I would be weak and try to take the easy way out. But no, not stupid, dumb Pinkie Pie. She can't seem to understand anything. I'm just fooling myself. It's going to take more than a little change of eating habits to get me desirable. I'm a slob with a big mouth. How am I ever suppose to lose weight without taking drastic actions like starving myself or doing the old binge and purge?

Pinkie stood up from the step. Today, she was going to tell everyone about her diet. She needed the support.

"Hello Mrs. Cake. How are you today?" Pinkie asked as she bounced into the kitchen.

"Good, what was the screaming about?" she asked. Mrs. Cake was currently feeding the twins. Pumpkin and Pound waved happily as she passed them.

"Ohh, that." Pinkie blushed at the memory. "I opened the curtains without my sunglasses on. Haha, headaches galore," Pinkie said with a roll of her eyes. Which probably didn't come across that well seeing as her eyes were covered.

Pinkie did her normal routine: Bowl of cereal, glass of milk, fruit. She sat down at the table and ate. Mr. Cake was busy making new batches of muffins for the lunchtime crowd. Mrs. Cake was feeding the children.

I wonder... Pinkie thought to herself. She needed to tell the Cakes about her diet. She mused on it as she finished her cereal.

"So..." Pinkie announced as she peeled her orange, "What are your guy's opinions on healthier eating?"

"Hmm, well. I think it's a good idea. Definitely something everyone should do though I can't really promote it too much." Mrs. Cake laughed. "Seeing as I run a bakery and all."

"Yeah, but what about the lower calorie stuff or non-fat things?"

Mr. Cake came round to the table. "I have been experimenting on a few healthier muffin recipes. Ponies these days are getting much more health conscience. Why, the other day a girl asked me if we had any non-fat cupcakes!"

"Really?" Pinkie giggled. Non-fat cupcakes! What a thought.

"I, of course, said no but it did give me some ideas. A new way to reach out to customers. We can be the first to have a healthy cupcake!"

"Such lofty ideas, sweetiebun." Mrs. Cake smiled.

"It could happen." He winked back.

Pinkie rubbed the tablecloth. "So, if I decided to go on a diet..how would you feel about it?"

"Pinkie, is there something you want to tell us?" Mrs. Cake raised a brow.

Pinkie swallowed. She might as well just come out with it.

"I had decided a week ago to start on a… diet. I wanted to uh get healthy. Lose weight," Pinkie said. She could feel her face burn with a blush.

"Really, you are? Why?" Mrs. Cake asked. Mr. Cake looked at her, stunned.

"To get thinner. I'm tired of being seen as the fat one of my friends. And I want a boyfriend. It's awful being lonely," Pinkie said. She sighed and put down the unfinished orange.

"Oh Pinkie, you're not fat, and all of your friends love you! But, can I understand what you mean," Mrs. Cake started. She moved over to Pinkie and put her arm around her. She also took off Pinkie's sunglasses.

Mrs. Cake sighed and rubbed Pinkie’s hair. "Today's concept of beauty can be really hard to deal with. Especially for bigger girls like us. And I understand about how you feel about wanting a special somepony of your own but losing weight should be for yourself and not others.”

"You say that but I know that's not true. It's all about what others think! That's why we don't see everypony running around wearing crazy outfits or not showering for weeks," Pinkie retorted. She pulled herself away and put her head in her hooves.

"I don't remember a time when 'what others think' stopped you from wearing crazy outfits." She paused and restarted. "What I mean, Pinkie. Is that if you want to go on a diet, you have to go about it for all the right reasons. Or it's all going to fall apart. There's a difference between getting thin and getting healthy."

"There is?" Pinkie asked confused. She put her arms back on the table.

Mrs. Cake laughed. "Yes, there is Pinkie. You can't go about interchanging them like they're the same thing. My hubby and I will support you in this, but you have to start by being truthful. Talk to us. Tell us about what you're up to and not lie about not being hungry. Ok?"

"Yeah," Pinkie said with a guilty laugh.

"She's right, Pinkie," Mr. Cake added, "We'll support you. Though I'm not too keen on the whole 'getting a colt thing'. Go on your diet, get healthy, and others will see how happy you are and how well you're doing. They'll notice you for all the right reasons and love you for it! But just remember," he said as he leaned in close to her, "There are some out there that do enjoy a fuller gal." He smiled and winked at Mrs. Cake.

"Oh, Honeybun." Mrs. Cake blushed.

Pinkie smiled and felt a wash of relief come over her. "Oh you guys. You're the best second parents a mare can ask for," she said pulling them into a group hug.

She had been so stressed out about the whole thing, and now she felt like the world had her back.

"Hehe, I'll try my hardest to do this thing right. And I'll remember the ‘thin is not the same as healthy’ thing. Sometimes I surprise myself at how dumb I am," she said.

"Hush now Pinkie. You're not dumb and don't you start calling yourself that. Nopony knows everything," Mrs. Cake said, reassuring Pinkie.

"Thanks. I'll remember that too."

Pinkie thought on it for a moment. How much has she missed? She had already learned a long time ago that growing up on a rock farm in the middle of nowhere certainly left a lot to be desired. Especially when it came to knowing certain 'common knowledge' everypony but herself seemed to know. Pinkie had resolved when she first came to Ponyville to work extra hard on learning what most would consider the basics.

Pinkie put back on her sunglasses and smiled.

"I'll be going out once I finish my orange. I still need to tell the girls."

"Okay, Pinkie. I'm positive they will feel the same way we do," Mrs. Cake said.

She gave Pinkie one last squeeze and went back to feeding the children. Mr. Cake winked at her and went back to pulling out the cooled muffins from the baking sheet.

Pinkie finished her orange and cleaned up her mess. She waved goodbye as she left the store. I feel on top of the world right now! Hehe, I wonder what the girls are going to say when I tell them. Pinkie bounced down the street. She didn't even let her mild headache bother her.

Pinkie was grinning wide when she went to round up her friends. She had gotten lucky with finding Rainbow Dash first.

"Hey, Dashie!" she called out. Rainbow Dash was maneuvering around a couple of clouds. Doing back-flips and weaving in and out between them. She came zooming down to land next to Pinkie.

"Hey, Pinkie Pie. I see you're wearing you Sunday glasses." She noted. Pinkie laughed nervously. Her friends didn't know about the nature of her Saturday night outings. She had told them these were her 'Sunday Sunglasses' and they didn't ask further. Sometimes, she was glad her friends didn't question her actions. Though, she didn't feel right about being able to lie to them so easily. Or that they didn't investigate her actions further. It was a real double edged sword.

"Yeah! Hey, I have an announcement to make to you and the other girls. Do you think you can gather them all up at Twilight's house?" she asked.

"Sure can do!" Dashie saluted and sped off to get the others. Pinkie smiled and bounced off to Twilight's.

When she got there, Rarity and Applejack were already waiting outside talking to Twilight.

"Hey gals!" Pinkie called out.

"Hello, Pinkie." "Good mornin' to ya." "Hi, Pinkie," they replied.

"So what is this big announcement you want to make? Oh I do hope it's another of your picnics. The last one was simply divine. Just what I needed after being cooped up for so long," Rarity commented.

"Hehe, no, sorry to disappoint. But I'll keep that in mind next time you finish another large order!" Pinkie replied.

"Fabulous," Rarity said.

Soon enough, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash flew in. They all moved into Twilight's house. Twilight made tea and got some snacks while the other girls speculated on what Pinkie could be announcing.

"Okay, if I can have your attention?" Pinkie started, "I have something important to tell you all! You all are my best friends. You've been with me through so much and I with you. That's why I'm happy to tell you, I'm on a diet!" Pinkie said with glee. She couldn't wait to hear what they had to say.

"Bwwaaaahhhahaha!" Rainbow Dash was on the floor laughing her head off. "You hah on a diet? Hahaha!"

"Yes, a diet. And I'm looking for a boyfriend," Pinkie retorted. That only made her laugh harder.

"A boyfriend? What do ya want one for, sugarcube?" Applejack asked confused. "You don't need a colt."

"Yeah, and I can only imagine what type of guy Pinkie would go out with." Twilight said with a roll of her eyes.

"Oh! I'm so glad. I was afraid I would have to keep using so much fabric to make your dresses and you can help out more with modeling," Rarity said with exuberance. "And I think it would do you some good to mature a little and get a good colt."

"Yes, maybe someone who can help you keep calm. If that's what you are looking for. I do hope so," Fluttershy added.

"Do you even know what to do in a successful diet? It takes hard work and a lot of willpower. Are you sure you can do it?" Twilight said.

"I don't know Rarity, I don't think she is mature enough or will mature from just having a boyfriend. A diet might change how she looks but what about what's on the inside?" Applejack asked.

"Hahaha! I don't think it's going to last more than a week. Who wants to take bets?" Rainbow Dashed asked, having recovered.

"I HAVE BEEN ON A DIET FOR A WEEK YOU BITCH!"

Dead silence.

They all looked at Pinkie. She had jumped up from her seat.

"What kind of friends are you? Talking about me like that? I'm a hell more grown up and mature than any of you could even grasp! FINE, be that way. I'm soo glad to finally know what you really think of me!" Pinkie yelled.

"Ahh, Pinkie..." Rarity started.

"Shut it! I don't want to hear another word for you, you gossiping wanna-be!" Pinkie screamed. This had turned out not at all like she thought. How dare they talk to her like she's some dumb child!

Pinkie turned her back on them and stormed out.

"Pinkie! Wait, let me explain," Twilight called.

"Hell no you pig headed know-it-all! I think you've already 'explained' enough!" Pinkie called back.

She had had enough. She ran. She didn't care how she looked running away. There was no excuse or 'explaining' for what they had said. The words stung as she ran to who knows where.

Popping the Balloon

It was a while before Pinkie slowed down. She gasped to catch her breath.

Pinkie staggered down the road, going from a full blown fun to a weak legged walk. Her eyes watered over and straight hair fell limp over her face. Pinkie eventually looked up to herself in the park. It was bright and sunny. There was the sound of children playing in the distance.

She looked up at the clear sky. It was such a nice day. Why didn't it rain!? Why couldn't the sky cloud over like in the movies and make everything as grey as she felt? Pinkie sat down under a tree. She quietly held back tears and stabbed at the ground with her hoof.

"Why the sour face Pinkie? Hmm? Miss me that much?" he said with a coy smile. It was Discord peeking over from the top of a pink cloud.

"No. Well ,I did miss you, but that's not why I'm upset," Pinkie replied.

Discord raised an eyebrow. He reached down to pick her up and laid her on his upturned stomach.

"If you're not sad from a distinct lack of chaos, then what could ever be getting you down?" he asked, smiling.

Pinkie sighed deeply.“I'm on a diet and my friends all reacted in such a... such a mean way! It's like they were all thinking how, I don't know, they just were so unsupportive! They didn't react in the way I thought they would, at all!" Pinkie cried out.

Discord felt shocked. His favorite element feeling so down? He felt an anger toward her 'friends'. But,he was just as shocked about the first part.

A...diet? What does she need to diet for? That's one of the stupidest things I've heard! He looked her up and down. Tsk, a diet would ruin her.

"I think they didn't know what they were thinking either. Maybe it was surprise that got them to say those mean things. What reason could ever prompt you to want to diet?" he asked. Pinkie was rubbing at her eyes.

"I think it was more than surprise that got them. Sometimes I don't know why they say somethings. I was just tired of being the fat one of my friends. I am tired. It's hard being compared to everyone else like that. I want a boyfriend and be able to fit Rarity's pretty dresses and just not be like this anymore," Pinkie admitted. She relaxed on top of him.

"What? Fun and full of life? You're not fat, you just have... a little extra frosting on top. It makes you more enjoyable."

"Enjoyable? How is this enjoyable?"

"You're a whole ton of fun to hug!" Discord said as he squeezed her to him.

Pinkie laughed, feeling better. Her hair had started to poof up again.

"I think you're great this way! And where would I be without my favorite playmate? No one else can out eat you. Ohh, I remember the time we made a house sized cake and drank soda till we floated! And, who else is there that enjoys my chocolate rain as much as you? Hmmm?"

"Is that all I'm good for?" Pinkie started, "Eating? Having fun? I don't want that anymore! I don't want this," she yelled as she jumped off him.

Discord looked over confused. Everything changed so suddenly.

"Pinkie! Come back!"

Pinkie's Journal Day Nine

Tuesday

Things haven't been that great GJ. The whole fallout with my friends has been hard. I've made a point of avoiding them. Even though it is a little hard. We live in a small town, it can't be helped that we run into each other. I'll cross the street or avoid looking at them. It's really hard when some of them, like Fluttershy, try to talk to me. I have to blow her off.

But while that's been hard to deal with, my main problem is Discord! He keeps coming around to tempt me with treats! Cakes and cookies. Eating it right in front of me. I can't really ignore him as he helps out at the bakery.

I don't get it. He just keeps pestering me. And getting upset when I deny him. Oh Celestia, that sounded wrong. But it's true! It's soo annoying. But what I think is the worst part, is that I miss being able to play with him. It's so constricting being on a diet. He wants to make chocolate rain with whipped cream (he remembered!) and I've got to say no.

I feel like I can't even be friends with him right now. But I don't want to lose anymore friends.

Sincerely, Pinkie

Day Ten

Dear Journal,

I've been working on a cool new project. I've been trying to come up with healthy cupcakes. Like, low fat or non fat or ones with vegetables in them! It'll be like a carrot cake cupcake. It's hard though, I've got to make sure I don't fill it with too much sugar to overcome the dull taste of the veges. So far, my best yet was one made with cabbage and beets. It tasted good but the color was soo of putting. I've been looking in some weird vegan cooking where they mix and grate and stir up dried flour stuff version of things to taste like anything! Even meat! I wonder if I could make that for Discord?

They make all sorts of things but mainly pasta type stuff. I'm looking into using it for cakes and pastries of all kinds.

Love ya, Pinkie

Day Sixteen Tuesday

Dear Glitter Journal,

Life is so hard right now. I'm sorry I haven't been telling you anything but my food record. It's been over a week since the incident with my friends. They've tried to talk to me but I've pushed them away. I know I shouldn't, that they are trying to make up for what happened, but I just can't. I can't deal with this right now. I just...don't feel like I can be friends with anyone right now.

I hate to admit it, but I had a big blow up with Discord. He couldn't understand why I would want to change myself. And I'm not just talking about the weight loss. I'm changing my personality too. I've been trying really hard to calm down. I've been visiting with Zecora. She would tell me about her country and how mediating works. She's also been working with me with my Pinkie Power. You know, the weird abilities I have. It was something I was doing with Discord a lot. Especially since he makes it so fun! and it goes right with how I am, or was.

It kind of hurts to mediate. It's really weird. I think it's because having to be still and quiet for so long reminds me too much of how life is like back on the farm. Oh, I hope I'm not turning into that. I just want to be more ladylike and pretty. Not boring. You should meet my two younger sisters. Sometimes it seems like they act like little robots or something. The only thing they ever to do is blink and nod. I'm so happy I didn't end up like that. It's a fate worse than death. I really hope they never read this. I love them to death but they just act like they're dead.

I'll tell you later what happened with Discord. I'm still... processing it.

Love ya~Pinkie Pie

Journal Day Eighteen, Wedesn Wedenes Wednesday

I guess sooner is better than later. I need to get through talk about what happened with Discord. It's not something I should keep to myself. Saturday, I'm going out with Grey Faerie. I really need to be with a friend right now.

It was this past Friday. He had been bugging me about coming to play with him. It was my day off and the usual thing we did was go to the lake.

It was around one o'clock when we reached the lake. A perfect time to go. Dizzy thought it would be funny to dump a bucket of sunscreen on me. It was, until it got into my mouth, then he quickly snapped it away. Sometimes it's better to do things the ordinary way.

Afterwards, we jumped in the lake and swam around. I pulled out my water gun, he make a water cannon. I threw some water balloons and he made a water spout. It was a ton of fun and just what I needed. After a while, we slowed down. Cordie (one of my many nicknames for him, I've got a ton!) was lounging on a inflatable raft and I was doing some water exercises. I guess this might have bugged him as he lowered his sunglasses to look at me.

"Do you have to do that?" he asked.

"No, but I want to," I responded. Discord huffed at that. He slid back up his over-sized glasses. They really looked good on him. It's not something anyone can, or were meant to, pull off, but he did it.

I decided to do some laps and was swimming around Cordie. He thought this was funny and started to smiled. I'm was happy he was feeling better.

"Hey, Pinkie."

"Yeah?"

"Do you know what would make this a whole ton more fun?" he asked as he got off his raft. He swam next to me.

"Hmm. More floating things?" I guessed.

"Well...yeah that, but I got a better idea." He smiled wickedly and snapped his fingers.

The whole lake was now made of chocolate with licorice plants and marshmallow floaty things. It was awesome! There were colorful gumdrop rocks, gummy worms pool noodles, and whipped cream floating by. I looked around with excitement. So many good things! I was just about to decide which to eat first when I was struck by the remembrance of my diet.

I froze. It was horrible! 'How can he do this to me!?' I had to get out of there. I swam toward the shore and grabbed my towel.

"Hey! Where are you going? I wanted to have another wate...chocolate fight. A water fight with chocolate milk. Isn't that fun?" He called out to me. He was so excited. And happy. It hurt to have to turn away.

"I... I have to go."

"Go? Go where?"

"Go... to the bathroom."

"Oh go go." he murmured. Discord sunk down to where only half his face was showing.

I felt bad for running away, but I had to. I went back to town. I was at the park so I found a place to sit down. I still smelt like chocolate. I was there only a few minutes when Discord showed up. He was not happy as he walked toward me.

"What do you think you're doing!? You said you were going to the bathroom and never came back!"

"It hasn't been that long."

"It's been long enough for me to figure out that you ditched me! What is wrong with you? Why are you acting this way!? You've been like this ever since you started this stupid diet."

"It's not stupid!"

"Of course it is! Look at you."

"Why are you so against it? Don't you want me to be happy?"

"Happy? Happy! You can this happy!? You're becoming nothing but a cranky conceited diet freak who'll probably develop an eating disorder!" he exaggerated. He was really yelling at me now.

"I will not!"

"You want to know why I hate you like this? I thought it would be obvious but I guess not! It's because I liked you better when you were fat, Ok!? You were fun, you were exuberant. Every moment was as random and sweet as the next. We had fun and laughed and ate! Yes, we ate, but it was fun and happy. Now look at you! What's left of you? Nothing, you're becoming just as thin minded as your body."

"You liked me fat?"

"Ohh for the love..! You are not fat! You are fluffy. You have a little extra frosting on top but that is what makes you great. You are fun to hug and embody everything I thought a happy, joy filled mare should be. You are laughter right down to your fluff."

"But..."

"But what? Are you so happy now? Hmmmm," Discord asked, leaning down to her "Well, I hope so, cause I certainly am not." He leaned back up. "I just... can't like you the way you are now. You're not my Pinkie Pie anymore," he said sadly as he flew away. Pinkie was left in the dust of what happened.

'He likes me? Or did anyway.'

I'm still reeling from the exchange. I'm not Pinkie Pie anymore? I'm not his Pinkie Pie? I'm trying to change but... I'm still me. I'm still The Element of Laughter and The Number One Party Pony! Sigh, I guess not. Even writing that down feels... empty.

Twelve Days. That's how long I had been on my diet when the fight happened. And he was only there for four of those days. Have I already changed so much, and for the worst? I'm glad I'm going to be seeing Grey soon. Ohh, frickity! Why is it that all my entries seem to end on such a negative note. I'm going out Saturday to celebrate. I'm going to do what I do best!

The party's getting started, looking good, and getting mildly drunk. Yeah, I'm pumped.
With Love and Laughter, ~Pinkie Pie~

Discord was 'home' at Canterlot Castle. It was the same day as Pinkie's current journal entry though he wouldn't know. He was in the dining hall as he had to have dinner with the two princesses. It was as fun as sitting in a waiting room. Discord was leaning against his hand and mindlessly stirring his soup.

The princesses exchanged looks. Luna tilted her head. Celestia looked uncertain. Luna stared and frowned at her. Celestia let out a silent breath.

Celestia cleared her throat. "Discord. How was your visit to Ponyville? It was surprising when you came back early. Luna and I didn't expect you back until late tonight."

"Yeah," he said blankly.

"Tomorrow even."

"Yeah."

Celestia sighed, “I regret not being able to ask you earlier."

"Yeah?"

"So what happened?" Luna yelled impatiently.

"Luna!" Celestia scolded.

"What? This is taking too long." She turned to Discord, "You've been acting weird ever since you came back. What happened? Did you lose a fight? Did the Cakes fire you? Maybe Twilight told you off! no, Rarity or was it Applejack. Did Pinkie..."

"Ugh! It's Pinkie! Okay? She's on a diet and it's infuriating me!" he said.

"She's on a diet? Why would this upset you?"

"She's no fun! She doesn't want to hang out with me. I-I don't know why it upsets me! It just does. She just wants to stick to her salads and exercise routines. And...and when she does have time for me, she rejects half the stuff we normally do! It's frustrating! She doesn't even want chocolate rain any more. Pinkie's just... not herself. She's not fun and I really really don't like this new figure of her's. It's too hard," he said, ending his rant of pent up feelings.

"Hard?" Celestia asked. Her curiosity peaked.

"Yes! Hard like, like, nothing. She's just nothing. It's like trying to hug a pole. There's nothing soft to enjoy. And to think she's not even done yet."

"So you like her soft?"

"Well duh, I just said that," he said, waving around his spoon.

"So, it's like, you would rather lay on a couch than a park bench?"

"Yeah of course… huh. Wha..what are you getting at with that!? Here I am upset and your making dirty jokes," he said, blushing.

"Nothing! I'm not! I'm just trying to get a better view on the situation," Celestia said, smiling. Luna snickered.

"It's not like that. Now, if you would get your mind out of the gutter. I could use your to help to sabotage Pinkie's diet! She was on to me from the start. And after the fight we had, I don't think I could go back for a while."

"Don't you think it would be easier to just tell her how you feel. That you liked her the way she was?"

"No," he said, scoffing. "Besides, I kinda ended up telling her that anyway. She's 'happier' this way, apparently." He rolled his eyes. "And the only way to get her back to her normal self is not with 'talking about feelings'. It's ruining her diet!"

She sighed heavily and gave him a look, "You're a clever person Discord. If this was the only way then I wouldn't be so against it, but it isn't. You know it would be better to 'talk about feelings'. Ok?"

He looks away. "I don't want to go there. It'll complicate things. I'm going to stick to my plan. And if you don't want to help, fine."

"Fine."

"And I'm going to remember that 'Clever person' bit," he smirked.

“Huh.”

Stepping Out

I am so pumped to be going out tonight! I really need it after the week I've been having. Pinkie shook her head as she walked down the road to Whitherston.

It was Saturday night and she was going out partying with her friend, Grey Faerie. Grey Faerie was a strange mare. For a pony only a few years older than Pinkie, she seemed to be so old at times. She also had many scars on her body that she usually covers with bandages and a strange way of talking. It was almost like an upscale Canterlot accent but with words all switched around. Pinkie had been fortunate enough to met her back when she was still a filly living on the rock farm. Grey was known around for her special talent of giving good advice in the chocolate shop she owns.

It was about a 45-minute walk to the town. Pinkie had her saddle bag of clothes, wallet and makeup. Saturday night was a night of freedom. She wasn't Pinkie Pie. She didn't do things ‘cause she was just Pinkie being Pinkie. She could unleash and be whoever she wanted to be. Tonight, she was going live it up as a new mare. She had slimmed down a bit and had set to calming herself down.

Pinkie reached the outskirts of the town and headed down main street to the square. From there, she turned left toward the shop district which lead into the danker parts of town. Grey's shop was a few shops down from the square. That made it a little out of the way but also left it as a sort of hidden gem.

She reached the shop and knocked on the side door. The sound of hoofs on wood flooring soon came toward the door. Grey Faerie opened the door and greeted Pinkie.

"Hello, Pinkie," she said.

"Hi, Grey! You ready to party?" Pinkie said with a big grin.

"Sure, who you want to be tonight?"

"The improved Pinkie Pie," she said with seduction.

"Hmm, I can do that," Grey replied.

Pinkie was lead in and up the stairs to the living quarters. She took off her bags and set them down on the table.

"I can get you all dressed very nicely. Do you want glitter? Shine? Maybe something black?" Grey asked.

"I want fun!" Pinkie replied.

"Cool."

They made their way down the road to their destination, The Cantering Stallion. This was no ordinary dance hall or club. It was an all out male strip club. Wearing no clothes didn't matter much to ponies. It was an everyday thing. The club knew this but also knew it was the allure of wearing clothes that tantalized the populace. The slow removal of the cloth was a reminder of how exposed they were. To see everything was an ordinary occurrence, so to not be able to see and wanting the reminder of how it all looks thrilled the girls.

Pinkie loved going here. It was one of the few places her reputation didn't follow her. She wasn't the number one party pony, or the Element of Laughter, or the silly little girl everyone thought her to be when she was here.

As the dancer came out, the music pumped through the speakers with the bass reverberated thoughout their bodies. The drinks that came round put a fire in her throat that quelled the flame inside for a moment before adding to it.

The dancer span around the pole with a slow grace. He moved with the beat. His wings giving his movements a flair. The collar around his neck had a tag of his cutie mark. A heart with holes in it.

For a moment, memories of talks with Grey Faerie came back to haunt her.

“It's hard, everyone sees me as some naive, innocent little girl while there's this part of me that wants to be an adult. It's like two worlds trying to collide. But it can never be. I need my image to be... a certain way. One that will help to keep up my persona of the lovable party pony. The happy-go-lucky girl everyone knows and cherishes. Unfortunately, this leads me to having a sort of double life. The only time I can really 'break out of my shell' and 'be myself' is when I'm with you, Grey Faerie.I think it's also because I'm afraid of how my friends would think of me if they knew."

She swayed with the music. One drink turned to two then three.

The dancers started to shed their clothing. They were becoming nothing more than birds displaying their feathers. Their lean bodies curved over as they played around the pole.

The movements spun, the ponies blurred then they came back into focus. So did the conversations with Grey.

"You know how I feel about the crazy diet stuff. It's horrible and unhealthy. What's wrong with your fluff? I loved your fluff. It was soo squishie. I love squishie."

"I know, but I promise. I'm being good and healthy!

"Promise"

"Yes."

"Good, but I'm still going to miss your squishy. You make me sad."

"I know but I really want a boyfriend. I'm tired of being alone."

"Ahh but what about me? hmm?"

"Haha Yes I still have you. But it's not the same."

"I hope you find someone good. Someone that will like you even after you become squishy again."

"How would you know if I'm going to become fat again?"

"You weren't fat. You were only a little fat and it's in your nature. For you, food is happiness, it's emotional well being. Like how those cultures express love through cooking. You'll find a guy who will see that. And find out how much more fun you are when you're full of cake."

"One can only hope."

She was getting annoyed. Everypony seemed so fixated on keeping her just the way she was. Was change so bad? Or was it that they just want her to stay the silly little girl with the extra fluff? Was her fluff that much apart of her? It was a sour thought.

Pinkie was well indulging in the bar's supply of alcohol. She was set on losing all her worries as she watched the dancers. The only thought to come into her mind was when was she going to see Chester get it on with his boyfriend? She hoped soon. The sour thought were trying to invade and conquer. She was all about having fun tonight and a private show was just what she needed.

She felt a twitch. Then another. Pinkie sense. She looked over to the right and coming in the door were the others of the mane six. All looking surprised and uncomfortable. They had come for her. Her only regret was never getting the private show.

Twilight was nervous when Celestia and Luna appeared in her living room that night. Not because they had appeared in her living room, or even because of the mission assigned to her. No, it was because the mission included all the Elements of Harmony...including Pinkie...who wasn't talking to them at the moment.

"But...Pinkie and me, and I...I mean the rest of us. We're...having a problem and...not really talking at the moment," Twilight confessed, lowering her head.

"Then wouldn't this be an opportunity to learn a lesson in friendship?" Celestia asked.

"Not, really. It's more of a 'we might not be friends anymore' problem."

"Not friends!? How could The Elements of Harmony not be friends? Your power only works through the Magic of Friendship. This is a travesty," Luna declared with a stomp of the hoof.

"Do not worry so, Luna. I'm sure this can be worked out. Twilight, I don't know what the circumstances are around this but I believe this rift between you two can be mended. Sometimes when we fight with friends it can seem like the end of a friendship," Celestia said. "But for now, we must get the rest of your friends and inform them of the mission."

"Yes, Princess." Twilight had a glum look about her.

Rounding up the others of the mane six was easy, even with them being interrupted or woken up. Equestria needed them. The two princesses did note how reluctant they were about going to get Pinkie. When they did get to her home, they were met with a surprise.

"She's not home. She almost always goes out on Saturday nights. Usually to Whiterston to see Grey Faerie." Mrs. Cake explained.

"Grey Faerie? Who's Grey Faerie?" Rainbow Dash asked rudely.

"No need for that tone with me,” She said with a hard look but soon softened. “She's an old friend of Pinkie's. She used to live in the town closest to Pinkie's farm. She gave Pinkie her first job off the farm and brought her with her to Ponyville. Grey even introduced Pinkie to us. She currently lives in Whiterston but Pinkie always finds time to call or hang out." Mrs.Cake explained.

"Oh, okay. Do you know what they are up to tonight? We need to find Pinkie." Twilight asked.

"She's either at The Cantering Stallion or The Salty Spittoon."

"The...Salty Spittoon?" Rarity asked.

"It's a bar that's connected to a dance hall. Don't be frightened by the name. Pinkie says it's leftover from when it was a biker bar. Well, goodnight. I hope everything works out fine. I do worry about you girls, running off and fighting evil. It's just not safe," she shook her head, motherly.

"Don't you worry 'bout us. We're made of tougher stuff," Applejack told her.

"Yeah! It's our job to do the dangerous stuff," Rainbow Dash added in.

"Thanks, Mrs. Cake. We'll try to be careful," Twilight reassured.

"Okay, goodnight." She said as she closed the door. The others called out a goodnight as well. They hoped this would be a good night. With everything involved, they had their doubts.

The group walked in the direction of Whiterston. When they got to the edge of Ponyville, they were unexpectedly met by Discord.

"What are you lovely bunch of ladies doing out this evening? Not taking a stroll I assume," he smiled.

"This has nothing to do with you Discord. We're going to Whiterston to find Pinkie," Twilight tried to walk past him.

"Pinkie? I'll come. I have been needing to talk to her too."

"This doesn..."

"Now now," he said as he waved his hand, "I know, but I would like to see her. Even for a moment. I haven't been able to even catch a glimpse of her in a while."

Twilight sighed, "Fine. Just don't get in the way."

"So don't walk in front of you and purposely slow down to a near stand still. Gotcha."

It took them a little while to figure out where Pinkie was. They had located The Salty Spittoon and were told she hadn't come that evening. Fluttershy had been intimated when the bouncer had insisted in asking 'How tough are you?' before letting them in. Rarity had been thoroughly put off. She didn't find it at all humorous like Rainbow Dash had.

The group really didn't know what to expect when they got to The Cantering Stallion. They had some idea of what the establishment might have been but they weren't ready to confirm exactly what type of place it was.

"This is...The, ah, Cantering Stallion?" Applejack asked. She had heard of these kinds of places but never thought she would end up going to one. Or that one of her friends frequented it.

"It appears so," Rarity replied.

"Spike!" Luna suddenly called out.

"Ahh...yes, Princess Luna?"

"Would you accompany me to find a doughnut shop? It would be a pleasant venture to find coffee for the Elements."

"Oh, ok. But what about Pinkie? I want to go in with everyon..."

"No! I mean, don't you want to come with me? Leave Pinkie to her friends. This will be a long night and they will be needing substance. You will be rewarded greatly for escorting me," she said with a wink and grin.

"Like, extra sprinkles rewarded greatly?"

"Extra chocolate as well if you prove most gentlemanly."

"I'm in!"

"I will go with you," Celestia added.

"But princess..." Twilight started.

"I think it would be most unfavorable if I would to be...seen entering this place of business," she whispered to Twilight.

"Oh, yeah. That makes sense," Twilight replied.

"How so?" Spike asked.

"I can't be seen entering because...it would make it look like I favor this place over others. The press are always looking for what shops and restaurants I go to and I don't want to bring unnecessary attention to a business that might not want it."

"But why would a shop not want the princess..."

"Are we not going to a doughnut shop? I can just hear the glazed rings of goodness calling to me," Luna announced.

"Yeah! Let's go. I'll see you later, Twilight!" Spike called out. The three of them walked away, back toward the center of town.

"Aren't you going with them?" Fluttershy asked Discord.

"Me? No, I'm more interested in seeing what Pinkie's wearing out at this type of establishment," he rubbed his hands together, "I wonder if they have a special for 'Girls Night Out'."

"Oh, ok."

"Are you totally sure? I highly doubt a male strip club is to your tastes," Rainbow said with a raised brow.

"I think I'll be too busy looking at the beautiful women to even notice where I am. And besides, just look at me. I could easily pass as one of the dancers." Discord struck a ridiculous pose. Twilight rolled her eyes.

"Let's just go in and get this done. I don't want to be be here any longer than necessary. I loath just being seen anywhere near a place like this. It would smear my good reputation," Rarity said.

"Don't you read all those girly romance novel?" RD asked.

"That's different," Rarity defended.

"Ah don't think any of us really want to be here," Applejack replied. "So, let's go in."

And so, they entered The Cantering Stallion. A place where any girl can feel good about herself. Where for a few bits, a beautiful colt will give you all the time and attention you crave. And of course, a steamy lap dance.

Author's Note

Woo, another chapter finished. I hope you enjoyed it. I really wanted to give a floaty/out of body perspective from Pinkie. She has a good buzz going from all the alcohol.

And truthfully, I really can't see any of the other mane six wanting to go to a strip club. Rarity's too ladylike, AJ too honest(can't think of a good way to put it), Flutters too shy, Dashie too embarrassed, and Twilight too awkward. Pinkie though, she'll be whole-hearted in the party atmosphere; drinking and screaming at them to take it off.

If you disagree, I would love to hear your reasoning.

A Dragonesque Figure

"Pinkie?"

She was sitting at a table with a half empty drink. She downed the last of it before responding. "Yes, what are you doing here? This isn't your kind of place."

"It isn't, and I didn't think it would be yours either, but the Princesses need us. Can you stand, er... or walk?"

"Of course I can. I'm tough." Pinkie staggered to her feet and walked over to Twilight.

"I'll go with you. Out to the door," Grey said, following them.

She pressed up to Pinkie to keep her steady. Discord was eying the place. It wasn't that shabby. Nor were the girls. Pinkie looked the best in his opinion. Her hair was curled extra tight and laid over one eye. Her clothes hugged her new frame, though he still wasn't too keen on it. They were a dark blue shorts and jacket with sequins. Her sparkling pink lipstick was matched by her glittering pink eyeshadow. She looked nice but also different. Like a stranger. He couldn't put his finger on it exactly.

They walked back out the front door into the cool night air.

"Whoa," Pinkie said as the air hit her. She stumbled. Discord caught her and held on as she steadied herself. Then she brushed him off. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure? You look a little off to me. You also look very nice, might I add. I've never seen you so dressed up before. I like it," he said with a wink.

She blushed, "Oh you. Always the flatterer. I'm supposed to be having fun tonight."

"I know. But it seems you're going to have to put it on hold," he said.

"Might I ask, what is so, important?" Grey asked "You come to get her and we need to know why."

Twilight spoke up to explain, "It seems that a dragon is causing trouble near the base of Canterlot Mountain. The princesses need us to see why that is and fix it."

"Another one! What are... we aren't the Dragon police. We're the goddamn Elements of Harmony. Why can't she go take care of it herself or get someone else to do it? I want to get drunk," Pinkie declared.
Grey gave a wicked smile, "I agree."

"Yes, I know this is, rather inconvenient. But, as the protectors of Equestria, it is our job to help out in such situations. We don't know if outside forces are involved in this matter. From what we have been told, it seems this attack is very unusual. The dragon involved has never done this before," Rarity explained.

"Maybe he needs a drink. Cause I do. Or! He's having a bad day. Either way, it's not any of my business. Just send Fluttershy to deal with it. She'll look at him the wrong way and I don't know. Make it feel bad."

"Oh, I don't know. It might be something more than that. What if he's upset because he needs our help. You need to come with us Pinkie. It's really important," Fluttershy said, worried.

"Fine, fine. But you owe me... a lap dance. I was going to get one you know. To celebrate! So when we get back, you...going to pay for one," Pinkie said. She then started to walk off.

"It's this way my dear," Discord said as he lead her the other way.

Pinkie had started to sober up on the way to where to the princesses were. But, sobering up seemed to worsen her mood as she became more aware of the situation and thus, more annoyed. The other girls didn't talk much as they walked. Even Discord was quiet though he did peek at her every now and again. The doughnut shop was a cute place between a convenience store and a clothes shop. It was called Hay There.

The princesses and Spike were at a table with a box of doughnuts and cups of coffee. They looked to be having a pleasant conversation. Twilight hoped they had made sure Spike got decaf. The little bell above the door rang out.

"Pinkie Pie. It is good to see you. Your outfit is, rather creative," Luna said as they entered the shop.

"Yeah yeah, I get it. Now where is this dragon so we can kick its ass and I can leave?"

"This matter might need more than an 'ass kicking'. It is at a town called Peacham at the base of our mountain. You and the other Elements will journey by train to the station nearest the outskirts. Then, you all will have to walk to the home of the dragon. It will take an hour or two to get there and figure out the problem."

"Why can't you just teleport us or something? Or take us there yourself or I don't know, Do it yourself? This whole 'Saving Equestria' thing is getting really old."

"This whole 'Saving Equestria' thing is your job Pinkie Pie." Celestia declared, "It is your job as one of The Elements of Harmony to help keep this country safe. My sister and I need to be in Canterlot so the political and economic structure of this country doesn't collapse into chaos! I would love to take care of this petty matter but I'm busy figuring out such things as foreign affairs and taxes!"

"I'm… sorry. It's just..."

"Enough. The rest of your friends know where you'll be heading. I suggest you go now or risk staying up all night, Spike."

"Uh… yes Princess?"

"Come along with us. You won't be needed on this mission. And besides, I think it's past your bedtime."

"Ahhh, okay," Spike pouted.

With that, Celestia, Luna, and Spike walked out of the shop.

"Coffee? It's just how you like it," Discord chimed in. Pinkie took it and gulped it down. The cream didn't completely cover up the taste of espresso. "Besides, I partially agree with you. It would be good for them to get out once in awhile. Political chaos is a horrid stain on the good name of Chaos! And it's all they surround themselves with. No wonder they think letting things be for a bit would be so bad," Discord lamented. Pinkie smiled.

"I will keep your clothes," Grey said.

"Huh?"

"You aren't going out to a mission in those, are you?"

Pinkie looked at herself and realized what Grey meant. "Oh, yeah,"

"I could help you take them off," Discord happily offered.

"Aren't you supposed to be going off with the princesses?" Applejack interjected.

"I don't need to."

"Ya also don't need to help Pinkie take her clothes off. So get."

Discord chuckled like a little kid. "Fine. I'll go," he said disappointed. "But this doesn't mean I won't be doing it in the future. She did never say no to my offer."

He then winked at Pinkie and walked out the door.

"He wants to take your clothes off," Grey loudly whispered.

"Oh… shut up," Pinkie replied, blushing.

Grey had left them shortly after helping Pinkie dress down. The Mane Six then went to the train station and boarded the train. They had tried to talk to Pinkie, to no avail. She didn't say much more than a few words. She was determined to hold onto her grudge. To show them how serious she was about how they had acted.

They got to Peacham's station and walked toward the town. A guide was supposed to meet them and show them where the dragon lived. He was also to tell them more about the attacks.

They got there and saw a brown and tan pinto Pegasus. He was wearing a beanie over his black mane and had a bird as his cutie mark. He introduced himself as Overo.

"Oh! Overo, what are you doing here?" Pinkie asked, "I thought you were in Whiterston with Chester."

"Hi Pinkie. No, I'm here help out with the local swallows. They're having issues with formations."

"You know him?" Fluttershy asked.

"Yep, he's Chester's boyfriend."

"Who's Chester?"

"He's a dancer at The Cantering Stallion. He's pretty popular," Overo answered proudly, "But, what happened to you? You look so.. different."

"I'm on a diet," Pinkie said happily.

"A diet? But why? You don't seem like the type to go on a diet., he chuckled.

"What would make you say that?" Pinkie replied, offended.

"You just...don't seem the type. I can't really imagine you eating salads or celery. Like some valley girl," he said with a laugh, "I've always seen you with some sort of cupcake or candy."

"Well, I'm changing that."

"Are you sure that's such a good idea? I wouldn't want you to completely change everything. And you looked just fine before."

"You only say that cause you're my friend."

"No I don't. I'm not that kind of person and you should know that," he said, angered. "Let's just get you guys to the dragon. That's why you're here."

Pinkie's face burned as she looked away.

"The dragon started to attack earlier today. It wrecked part of the forest to the west of here. We managed to keep it away from the town but it could start up again at any time. We also have kept the fires back and only earlier tonight got them all out," Overo explained.

"So where is this dragon now? I'm ready to kick some ass," Rainbow Dash declared.

"It's three miles to the west of here. Follow the yellow tape to the burnt part of the forest and continue toward the mountain. You'll see a lot of toppled trees leading to a cave. Be careful when you get there. We haven't been able to evaluate the damage so a tree might come down at any moment. We also don't know how the dragon will react to you guys."

"We'll be careful. Don't worry about anything. The Elements of Harmony has got this," Twilight announced.

"Okay, I'll see you later. Just come to City Hall and ask for me. They'll give you directions to my house."

"Why would we want to go ta your house?" Applejack asked.

"So you have a place to stay. I've got plenty of room and it's easier to crash at my place than deal with a hotel."

"Oh, that makes sense. Ah guess we will see you later then."

"Goodbye, and good luck!" Overo called out as he walked away.

They called out a goodbye as well.

"Come on girls. We should get this done before it gets too late," Twilight said.

The group followed the yellow tape to the burnt forest Overo had mentioned. It was a horrible sight. The trees were torn from the ground with dirt still clinging to their roots. The brush had been trampled and ripped apart. Damaged limbs hung over them as they carefully maneuvering around the debris.

A stinging filled their noses from the pungent smell. It wasn't like that of a nice roaring fire but of burnt mulch and seared dirt. The distinct smell of wet wood also added itself to the unpleasant aroma. Fluttershy couldn't keep herself from wondering if any little animals had been trapped and forced to suffer the same fate as the surrounding area.

They got through the clearing and were lead towards the mountain. The path there was quite obvious with the grey ashes helping to distinguish the trail from the brown soil. They walked a ways until they finally got to the mountain side then another 15 minutes till they got to an opening in the rock. The destruction around the cave was more than what they had previously seen.

The area looked barren as if the land had been cleared and then snowed upon. The air still had lingering dry ash floating around but most everything looked to have been wet down at one point. The open land gave the entrance a more ominous feeling. They looked at each other, uncertain, before entering.

The inside of the cave was remarkable large. Twilight lit up her horn to light up the area. They neared the center of the cave and saw how the moonlight came in from skylights. The ponies tasted the fresh air the holes let in. There, in the center of the cave, was the dragon.

It was a very large purple dragon, with a yellow underbelly and yellow horns. Its eyes were a deep blue. The mound of gold and gems it sat upon was vast. It was clear this was a permanent home and not a rest stop.

"Ponies. What are a couple of ponies doing in my lair? I could eat you. Or simply cook you. Maybe I'll do both," he said.

"We're here on behalf of the Princesses and the townspeople. We're here to find out why you went on a rampage and tried to destroy the forest along with the town," Twilight asserted.

"A rampage?" He said. It made Twilight back up a little. "I have my reasons for doing so. Very good reasons. You see," he said getting up. "A few days ago, I noticed a couple of ponies. Much like yourself and those townspeople, sneaking out of my cave. I gave chase but lost them. When I came back to my cave–" He bent down to Twilight's level, staring at her face to eye "–I discovered a large portion of my treasure, missing."

He got back up and stared them down. They all leaned away from him.

"That is my reason for going on a rampage. And I intend to do so until I find the thieves who stole my treasure."

"Wha...What was so special about this treasure? If I might ask?" Rarity inquired.

"IT'S MINE!"

They all reeled back with a few collapsing on the ground. Fluttershy decided she should intervene before anyone got hurt. Dragons still scared her, but she knew she could be brave if meant keeping others from getting hurt.

"That all fine and good but this is the wrong way to go about it mister," she said having flown up to him and crossed her arms. "If you need help, we can do it. We'll help you find your missing treasure just a long as you don't continue burning everything down!"

He swiped her up in his claw and brought her up close. Everyone including Flutters gasped.

"Help me? Fine little one, you can help me. Even though I had lost the thieves, I had managed to surround the area with my fire. I believe my treasure is somewhere in that town. Find the thieves and bring them and my treasure back to me by tomorrow evening. The sooner, the better." he growled.

He put her down and turned around. They could feel the dismissal from his cave. They left the cave and headed back to town.

"This is just great! How are we ever going to find them? We don't know what they look like or even how many there were!" Rainbow Dash yelled.

"I understand ya. But we can't be letting ourselves get too riled up. We've got some varmints to root out," A.J. responded.

"I agree, dear. This is just dreadful. Thieves robbing a poor dragon while he's away! I would feel just the same if it had happened to me," Rarity said.

Twilight chuckled, “Yes, but your kind of rampage would be less fire and more screaming."

"Oh, I wouldn't put it past Rarity to add a little fire to her rampage. It'll be in the form of hot irons and glue guns," Fluttershy added. Everyone had to laugh at the image of Rarity rampaging through town with irons, hot hair curlers, and a gun glue.

"Yeah! I could just imagine her transforming into some horror story character like the old lady asking Who's got my rusty horse shoe?" Pinkie joked. Everyone was practically rolling on the ground at that point. A.J. was holding her sides.

"That is just too funny. Ha! Who's got my precious jewels?" A.J. said.

"Haha, my precious." Rainbow Dash managed to get out before falling into a pile of giggles.

"Oh, that is just going way too far," Rarity said in a huff. "Don't we have a time limit on finding these thieves?"

"Yeah, we do. Thanks for reminding us, Smeagol," Pinkie said. That really set them off. Everyone was on the ground laughing.

"Aah!"

It took them a few minutes to calm down and continue on. Eventually, they got back to town. It was around 3 am by then. They had decided that the best choice was to go to Overo's place and sleep until morning. Then, they would go out into the town and look for any leads.

The Mane Six walked to the City Hall. Amazingly, it was still open.

"I didn't think to wonder if the City Hall might be closed. It is late. But, I guess he wouldn't have said to go here if it would have been closed." Twilight stated.

The city hall was still busy with volunteers and city workers watching for any sign of the dragon. Others were discussing plans to rebuild the forest.

"Um, Excuse me, sir?" Twilight asked one of the workers, "Can you tell us how to get to Overo's home? We're staying with him."

"Oh! You must be Twilight. And the other Elements of Harmony. Welcome! He's staying at Mog's Inn. It's down the road, turn left at Seventh's Heaven. It should be right next to Wall Market. If you pass Sephiroth's Salon, you've gone too far."

"Okay, thank you!"

They got to Overo's house in a relativity short time. Pinkie wondered about the names of those shops they passed. It sounded like something from a video game. Twilight knocked on the door and Overo answered. He showed them to the guest rooms. By the time they got situated on beds and sleeping bags, they were all too tired to do much else. Overo assured them he'll set the alarm and they all fell asleep.

Author's Note

*I did the Final Fantasy references for my friend.

The Barren Land

The alarm on the clock went off all too soon. The girls groaned. They were all tired and sore so they didn't much look forward to the day's events.

Pinkie had a headache. She pulled herself up to sitting on the bed. It wasn't as bad as a normal hangover but it still hurt. Her hair hung on her face in an assorted manner. She ran her hoof through her mane and looked around the room at the other girls. They were in all staging of rolling out of bed. Some more easily than others.

It had really been hard these last few days. I loved my friends! They're my only best friends. I really do want to make up with them.

Pinkie pulled the blanket off her and got up. She trotted down the stairs to living room and went to the kitchen. Surprisingly, Overo was there.

"Hi," Pinkie said quietly.

"Hi," Overo answered "You've got a rough day ahead of you." He was standing my the island with his coffee.

"Yeah, but I just don't feel like doing anything," Pinkie said. She looked for a mug.

"Why?"

Pinkie found one and filled the mug. She pulled out milk for the coffee.

"I'm tired. I'm sad. I never wanted to even come here. I'm fighting with my friends and I feel so alone."

"You're not alone."

"I am! I started this whole thing because I'm alone!"

"Pinkie, calm down. What are you talking about?"

"I'm sorry. I'm just stressed." Pinkie ran her hoof through her mane again, "I started the diet because...I don't have anyone who really loves me. It seems so silly but I just want to be selfish and have a boyfriend. I want there to be someone I can entrap. I want a pony who will love me and never leave me or make me sad. It's just not enough anymore to have friends. I want a more-than-friends."

"I think everyone wants that. And feels that way. Even when it comes to me and Chester. I want to know he'll love me and never leave. But is that all this is about?"

"I don't know."

Overo opened his mouth when a pound was heard upstairs.

"That's probably Dashie falling out of the bed." Pinkie put the milk back and got her coffee. She left for the living room before he could continue.

The other girls were getting up and ready for the day. They were all anxious energy. They still didn't know how they were supposed to do such an impossible seeming task. They walked downstairs to go to the kitchen. They passed Pinkie who was sitting in one of the arm chairs with a cup of coffee.

They all said hi to Overo. They all got something to eat and brought it back to the living room.

The living room was a basic rectangle with the windows and front door on the long wall. Pinkie was sitting in a chair near the far right corner. There was a couch by the other long wall and a simple coffee table.

They all settled down around the coffee table. It was a strained moment for many reasons.

Overo walked into the room and looked around. He could feel the tension. He looked over at Pinkie and had to comment.

"Pinkie, is that all you're having for breakfast? Drinking coffee on an empty stomach isn't good for you, you know."

"It's fine Overo," she said sternly.

"I agree dear. It can upset your stomach and actually make you more tired. You need plenty of water after a long night's sleep. And what about your hair! I'll go get my brush," Rarity said.

"Don't bother Rarity and besides, I don't need any water. I'm bloated as it is."

"That's ridiculous. You're not bloated. Don't talk like that."

"Why not? It's true."

"It's not good for your self esteem."

"Self esteem? I'm fat."

Overo just shook his head. "No one can argue with Pinkie when she's this way."

Pinkie glared at him.

"Pinkie, I'm just worried about you," he said as he left the room to go back to the kitchen.

"I think we're all a little worried about you, Pinkie." Fluttershy said.

She rolled her eyes. Overo came back with a muffin and held it out to Pinkie which she took with a frown.

"Come on, we've got some thieves to catch," Applejack said.

"Yeah! So, how are we going to even do that? They could be anyone in this town," Rainbow Dash pointed out.

"We could split up," A.J. said.

"No, that could take all day and we only have a day. We need a plan to draw them out," Twilight responded.

"We could leave some gold for them to steal." Rarity said.

"No, they already have gold," Pinkie stated, but...no way out."Yes, it's perfect." She leaned forward, munching the muffin.

"What? What's perfect?"

"Okay, hear me out. We could get into the town because of official business and we can leave anytime we need to. Right? But no one else from area can because of the police keeping everyone here for safety. It's only a guess but most likely the thieves aren't from this town. And, they're probably just itching to go to their hideout or a place to sell the loot."

"Ooo, I follow ya, Sugarcube. We could offer to escort some ponies out of the town. Like, announce that anyone that lives somewhere else and wants to go home, we'll walk them there. That would include all of their luggage."

"I think we should tell the dragon," Fluttershy said.

"Why?" Rarity asked.

"So he doesn't think we're running away."

"Yeah! And we could even have him help!" Twilight exclaimed. "We could have him far down the path. That way he could see if he recognizes anyone."

"I like that idea. Fluttershy dear, do you think you could convince him to go along with it?" Rarity asked.

"Yeah, I think I can."

"Ok girls, this sounds like a good plan. Thanks Pinkie. Now let's sort out exactly what's going to happen," Twilight said.

"Yes, but first I need to take care of Pinkie's hair." Rarity grinned.

An hour later, all the girls were in position. Fluttershy and Rarity had gone ahead to speak with the dragon. Rarity had come back with the message that he had agreed to it. He and Fluttershy were making their way to the designated spot. It would be down a path going towards the next town.

Pinkie talked to Overo to tell the local authorities that a town meeting would be held. But, he wasn't to tell why. Only that the girls had something to say.

Twilight was on the Town Hall's porch that served as a stage. A podium had been moved onto the stage.

"Thank you all for coming out today. My friends and I have been sent here by our Princess, Celestia, to sort out the situation with the neighboring dragon. Since coming here, we have managed to appease him to the extent that he will allow passage out of town, for any out-of-towners." Twilight gave a pause so the crowd can take in what she's said, "Unfortunately, the train is out of commission. But, the path to the next town isn't very far. We'll be waiting at the town's limits for anyone looking to leave. Bring along any luggage you have. You won't be able to come back for quite a while until the situation is fully sorted out." Twilight finished her speech and stepped down. The Mayor then stepped up to say a few words about what a great thing this is for the town's guests.

"Nice, princess. I think that was just perfect," Overo complimented.

"Ohh, thanks. I'm still getting used to the whole 'giving speeches' thing." Twilight blushed.

"Coulda fooled me," Rainbow commented.

"Come on. Applejack and Rarity are waiting with our stuff," Pinkie said.

All the girls, expect Fluttershy, were waiting at the limits with Overo when three stallions with suspiciously heavy looking suitcases arrived.

"Welcome! Or should I say So long! We are leaving town. But we all are leaving. So I guess, Welcome! We're leaving," Pinkie spouted to the newcomers. "Is that all? No one else? Okay! Hey! Let's sing a song. On the road again, we're on the road again.."

"Pinkie! Um, thanks but no thanks. Anyway, welcome to the group. Do you need any help with your luggage?" Twilight asked.

"No, we've got it," the lead stallion said.

"Okay then. Onwards," Twilight said as she lead the way.

They were walking a few minutes when one of the other stallions spoke up.

"It's too bad the train's out. You wouldn't know why would you?"

"No coal, buck. It all got burnt up by that dragon. The trains people didn't know I guess," Applejack said.

They walked along for a while more before one of the stallions spoke up again.

"I thought there were more of you?" he said, looking around the group.

"There was. Our friend Fluttershy had to see if the path was clear. We'll catch up with her in no time." Rainbow explained this time. The stallions still weren't sure but the girls sounded honest enough.

The girls looked at each other as they neared the designated spot. Soon, it'll be time to spring the trap. They reached a clearing in the forest and stopped.

"We're here!" Twilight called out. All the girls ran around the edges of the clearing and behind the stallions but leaving a spot open. The stallions sensed the trap and ran towards the opening in the ring when the trees came crashing down. The dragon stepped out. Fluttershy hovered along side his head.

"I think you have something that doesn't belong to you." Fluttershy stated as she crossed her forelegs. The dragon puffed smoke through his nose and eyed them.

"Shoot, it's a trap. We wouldn't go down easily. You little girls might have a dragon on your side but you're no match for us," the leader said cockily.

"Wow, you really don't know who you're dealing with," Rainbow Dash said.

He nervously shifted his eyes around to find any weak spots in the ring of mares. He bolted towards Rarity. The other two colts had been fearfully standing behind him but now scrambled around to go anywhere but here.

Rainbow Dash circled them as Rarity tossed out a long rope. She caught one end and wrapped them up. Twilight teleported their luggage away. One of the stallions was a unicorn. He teleported out of the ropes only to be hit by a kick from AJ. The other two tried their best to wiggle out of the bindings. The unicorn flared up his horn. Then the heat came. The dragon blew fire just above them.

"You should probably give up unless you want to get all toasty," Pinkie suggested. They stopped struggling. They knew they were trapped.

"Don't feel too bad sugar. Ya varmints didn't have a chance against us 'little gals' to begin with. We've fried bigger fish then ya."

To say it ended quickly was an understatement. It only took a few minutes to see if all the missing treasure was there. Then it was a relatively short walk to the train tracks with the three tied up stallions. The train came soon after RD went to the tell the workers where they were.

"Are you coming with us?" Pinkie asked Overo.

"Oh, no. I've still got work to do. Also, someone needs to go tell the town everything's been fixed."

"Okay! I'll tell see you later, oh and I'll tell Chester you said hi."

"Thanks. But, Pinkie." Overo smiled.

"Yes?"

"I don't know what's happening with you but, the only advice I can give is that you have to love yourself. Before and after. Or nothing good will come from this."

Pinkie's face was serious as she nodded. He smiled, turned and left for the town.

"Now you remember what we talked about. Ponies aren't all bad. Next time you need help, ask for it. There might be somepony willing to help," Fluttershy said to the dragon.

"I will think on that. It would be a.. better option than burning my own forest. Goodbye, little one," he said before leaving.

"Ahh, onwards to home," Pinkie said as she stuck her head out the window. The train's officers had the thieves in a cell car.

"Hey Pinkie?" Twilight asked. Pinkie stuck her head back in. "Why did you never tell us you where you went off to on Saturday?"

She was still a little unsure if their relationship had been mended enough for such questioning. Pinkie answered right away.

"I didn't want you guys to know about that side of me."

"But why?"

"Because, I didn't want you guys to think of me as that type of party girl."

"But you are that kind of party girl."

"No! I'm not. I mean, yeah I go out and drink. But I'm not irresponsible nor am I easy. I didn't want everypony to think I was a crazy party girl that got drunk and did stupid things. I know what kinds of ideas ponies get when they see me out dancing and–" Pinkie waved her hooves around. "–waving bills at strippers or getting up on the bar to dance. I like to have fun but I don't want my friends to think poorly of me. It's a different kind of fun."

"I think I could understand. It's hard to be yourself, even around friends," Fluttershy said. "But your problem makes me feel silly for not wanting you girls to know about my knitting. I just didn't want you girls to think I was dorky or something."

"I didn't want anyone to know I like to read for the same reason," RD agreed.

"I like to read romance novels. It's a bit of a guilty pleasure," Rarity ventured to say.

"Me too!" Twilight yelled, before blushing.

"Umm, me too," AJ said as well.

"Really!?"

"Ye-yes, you see, it's one of those few ways I feel um, girly. I would like to be romanced by some strapping gentleman." AJ shrugged.

"Hahaha. Wow you guys. I didn't expect all that!" Pinkie covered her reddened face. "Maybe I should invite you guys with me! To the Cantering Stallion. It's fun to go with Grey but it'll be even more fun with the rest of my best friends! It'll also take a lot of stress off trying to hide that part of me. It's so fun! Now, I don't read romance novels but I think you guys might enjoy yourselves there."

"Well, umm, I guess. But only if you want, I mean, if we're not invading your quality time with that grey mare. What was her name? I'm so sorry I forgot," Fluttershy asked.

"It's Grey Faerie, and I think she'll just love to dress you guys up in sexy wear! Phhhahaha, I just imagined you guys getting drunk and waving bills," Pinkie said before collapsing in a fit of giggles.

They blushed and laughed with her.

"I think we need to get to know each other better," Twilight stated. "Not only would it be a good letter but this makes me realize that for all we've been though, we don't know that much about each other. Personally."

"Yeah, that is strangely true," RD said rubbing the back of her neck.

"We should have a slumber party!" Twilight suddenly called out.

"Huh?" Everyone looked at her like she was crazy.

"Umm, you know. At slumber parties they play games like Truth or Dare or Two Truths and a Lie. We can play games to find out more about each other," Twilight explained.

"I think that's a great idea," Pinkie said.

"Us too," Everyone agreed.

"Well, it's going to still be a while till we get back to Ponyville. What should be do now?" Rarity asked.

"I want to hear what everyponies' been up to,” Pinkie said.

I was right. A fun day out with friends is exactly what I need. It just didn't happen in the way I thought it would. Pinkie thought to herself. Pinkie felt lighter. She felt freer. She looked forward to hanging out with her friends again and they all agreed to plan a time to get together for a slumber party soon.

By the time she got to her house, she was happy but was still weighted down. She had remember that she had to properly make up with Discord. She was also hungry. She opened the fridge and stared in. She wasn't so sure of everything now. Should she just stop the diet? Should she have continued to talk to Overo? Why was she feeling this way? In the end, she sighed and closed the fridge. She was just too filled with doubt now.

Pinkie walked upstairs to her room and laid down on her bed. A small smile came to her face as she thought of her friends at The Cantering Stallion.

Author's Note

Yay, Pinkie made up with her friends. But, depression and low self esteem aren't something that goes away so easily.

How Now Brown Cow

Dear GJ,

It's been a week since I've made up with my friends. Yay, it's sort of like an anniversary. We're still planning to have that slumber party I told you about. And about them to coming with me to The Cantering Stallion!

It's been hard, letting them see me like that. They haven't said anything but I'll sure they're having a hard time getting their heads around the 'Real Pinkie'. I don't feel like there is a 'real' or 'fake' Pinkie! But I think it's because they still think me too naive and innocent. It was a lot for them to take in and I'm afraid they might be starting to deny all of it.

I've also been trying really hard to change other parts of me. I just wish they were more supportive. I decided the other day to that since me and Rarity made up I should ask her how to be more ladylike. And she laughed! Again! I had to laugh as well and say it was so I could plan fancy parties and soirees better. She seemed pretty open to help me after that. I didn't want to get mad at her. We just got over a fight! I don't know what bothered me more. Her laughing or her saying, 'She just couldn't see me be anything but me.' Whatever that means. She seems to have already forgot that she doesn't yet know 'me'.

On another note, I haven't seen Discord for a while. Fluttershy says she's seen him but he hasn't said anything about me. I kinda wish he would though. I think I really like him.

Dear GJ,

I just haven't been feeling too good lately. I think I might be depressed. I've lost quite a bit of weight but the restrictions on eating is really hurting my business. I can't get myself to taste the cakes and pastries around the shop. I'm also irritated at parties. There's just too much unhealthy food. I hate seeing them gorge themselves on pizza and cake. Did I look like that? Ugh. I feel snappish. I wish everyone would stop trying to tell me what to do. Just let me be! I want to just be free to do what ever I want.

Dear Glitter Journal,

I think I hate Fluttershy. And probably Rarity too. They think they're so pretty and Fluttershy gets to hang out with Dissy like she owns him. Maybe she does thinks she does what with writing to him and him hanging around her house all the time. I wonder if she knows he likes me? Rarity thinks she's just sooo much better than everyone else. She's all high class and proper. It's too hard not to tell her off during our sessions. 'I'm not a child. I know what a fork is for.' So pompous. She grew up in Ponyville, but she'll act like this is just a rest stop on the road to Canterlot. At least it's easy not to eat around her. She expects me to take dainty bites on a tiny serving. I had asked her not to tell anyone about these lessons. I don't want another round of 'let's laugh at Pinkie trying to be someone else'.

Good news! I can fit into my gala dress. In fact, it's little loose. Yay, for Pinkie.

It's too hard now to not act like myself. I'm too short tempered. I don't know what's happening to me sometimes. I'm changing yes, but it's scaring me. I've got to stay happy. Happy happy happy Pinkie. Smile!

Ugh, I'm tired. That's all. I'm tired but it's too easy to fake it. I've been having bad dreams lately. All of my old house. The too cold nights. The hunger. I had to help my sisters. I'm the oldest after my older sister left. I could feel a part of me shattering. It's like there's something inside trying to get out. I don't know what it is. I don't like any of this.

Everypony has got to stop telling me to cheer up. I don't feel like it. I'm tired. I just want to sleep.

I remember how I came to Ponyville. I had met Grey Faerie one day in town. It was a rare day as we didn't often go to Petra. I remember how strange she looked but the chocolate! She was giving out free samples and they were soo good. She asked if I wanted to go back with her to the shop and I said yes. It smelled so good. It was warm and comfy. I had hot chocolate and talked to her about everything. I forgot to tell my parents were I was going. So, they were really mad when they found me.

My father went on about 'running off'. Grey defended me. Saying she didn't know I was with anyone. Then she offered me a job! Can you believe it? It was so strange and quick but she said I had just the attitude she was looking for. I remember walking from home to to town that first day. It was the first time in a long time that I've had something to look forward to.

I used to live in a place called The Grey land. It's official name is Dray Shire. I lived in a subsection called Rock Trot and the town's name was Petra. Pie Rock Farm, Petra, RT, DS is the mailing address I use to write to my family. It goes to the post office in town and they pick it up once a week.

She asked me to write about it. How I felt there. No buddy talked, no buddy smiled. It was like we were all dead. The walking dead in a land of grey. Not even my fleeting smile could bring comfort to my sisters for very long. There was nothing to do and nothing to look forward to.

I remember telling Grey all my secrets. How it was too easy to steal. It was too cold and strange at night for anyone to want to go out. I used to wander around town and look at the doors. I remember thinking, 'What did the dead need locks for?' After that, it was one long walk to Petra and back. It was just too easy. A loaf of bread here, a bottle of milk there. Dad didn't know. Mom pretended not to know. Things weren't very good on the farm. We were having some really bad money problems. It took all we had to even keep the farm. This was all before I could do something really good like throw that concert. I'm so glad things never got as bad as it had been in those days.

I remember one time just leaving during the day. Just left one day during lunch. There wasn't anything to have anyway. I remember thinking, 'The dead aren't very attention to the living'. I snuck into town and took a loaf of bread. I came back and shared it with my sisters. I took them I used my pay from the shop. They didn't know yet that I was saving up to leave.

It wasn't a very sad day when I left. One less mouth to feed and a chance for some extra income. A part of my paycheck still goes to them. The Cakes know why but don't pry. My sister were scared. Would they have to leave the farm like I did? How would they live out there? What would they do? I was always the strongest one. I kept them going in the the greyest of times. It's kinda ironic my savoir was a grey pony.

Grey took me away to Ponyville. She had brought me there a few times before. It was so great! I remember throwing parties and having fun. She went here on business. I remember wondering why I was to live with The Cakes. It turned out, they owed her a favor. She had given them a few of her chocolate recipes. They had no children then. But they were so kind! They loved me and we became such good friends.

I remember how scared I was at first. I was to live there. In a place were I felt stupid and dull. I had to catch up with everypony else in schooling but I still feel like I've missed too much. I remember the guilt. I mean, I was living in a freaking bakery! Surrounded by food. Surrounded my everything I could ever need. For the first few weeks, I sent every cent I made to that house in Rock Trot. I tapered off after a while. I held parties and had fun. I didn't feel like I was a freak with a useless talent. I knew I was welcome and they didn't care how weird or odd I was. I could cheer up the hopeless. Instead of hopelessly trying to cheer up ponies who never want to be happy.

Dear Journal,

I'm feeling better now. I had been feeling really down lately. I guess it was because of all the stress of changing myself. But, there was more to it. I was so tired of being sad. I hated feeling unhappy or depressed. I had made up with my friends. That alone put a bit of spunk back into me. But there were a lot of other things I'm dealing with. The one thing that's made me really happy is the party I'm organizing for a local arcade. Though, I think it's the working part that's making me feel better; more than the party part. Work helps to get my mind off of everything.

I can't help but put a little skip in my step. I've really gone all out. The party is going to be Pirate themed and I even managed to budget in a few actors to play as the scoundrels! I have a plank build over the ball pit for them to walk! The food is all themed as well. I even gets to dress up! This is going to be so much fun.

It's just so stressful! I love party planning. It's what I do, but ugh, sometimes I wish it were easier. I've got so much to do and the decorations were late. Luckily, they came only a half an hour later than they were supposed to. Gosh, I got to take a break. Thanks for letting me vent.

The afternoon sun was warm. A breeze swept over the lake bringing the smell of water. It was a little humid by the lake but the shade was nice. Pinkie's sitting by the lake again, taking a break from reality. It felt good to get away from the town and work. She breathed in the humid air and closed her eyes.

When it started raining. Pinkie snapped open her eyes and her mouth opened to gasp when it dripped in. It smelled and tasted like chocolate. Pinkie's smile broke across her face and she tilted her mouth up.

"Ahhh." Pinkie's tongue flopped out. There was a chuckle and Pinkie opened her eyes to see Discord peeking over the top.

"You looked like you needed some cheering up. On a normal day, this would be the best option." he said morosely.

"Luckily, this happens to a normal day." she grinned, "In fact, so normal that the very grass should be candy and the flowers, licorice!"

He smiled widely. "Now that's the Pinkie I know and love." He snapped his fingers.

"Love? I thought you only liked me. I didn't know you meant you like-liked me." she said playfully. A blush spread across his face. Pinkie smiled at him.

"NO TIME TO LOSE! I want that lake filled with soda and a sea worthy vessel on there ASAP!"

"Aye aye captain." Discord replied saluting.

Dear Glitter J,

It's been so long since I've last had this much fun! I really liked hanging out with Dizzy again. I really do like him and he likes me too! Me, just me. We had fun and laughed and it was all so great. We hugged goodbye and promised to meet up again. It was so great but then I start doubting everything. I get happy and distracted for the moment but once the moments gone, all these unwanted, unhappy thoughts start coming in. Should I continue with this whole thing? Should I go back to the way I was? How different is everything now? It's not even about a diet anymore! I don't know. I really want to talk to Grey but she's visiting her sister. I should talk to the rest of the girls. But I'm nervous.

The party was great, the ponies less so. I don't want to talk about it. I'm just really confused. Ponies don't like you went you're fat, you lose weight, then they tell you to eat a hayburger and make fun of eating salads. I'm not totally thin yet. I still get comments on my weight. I just didn't realize it was the other way around too. What do ponies like? How can I be that pony everyone loves? Thick or thin, maybe I'm just not cut out to be pretty.

Pinkie sits by the window looking bored. She sits unsmiling even as Mrs. Cake puts down a plate of treats and tea. The shop is closed today. Mr. Cake plays with the twins in the dinning room play area. Pinkie sits, lost in thought about nothing.

"Maybe we should do something." Mrs. Cake whispers to her husband.

"Sugar bun, I don't think there is much we can do."

"But just look at her!" she said in a harsh whisper, "She's not herself anymore. She's getting thin and..and..I'm just so worried. I don't know what to do."

"Calm down. I'll go talk to her."

"Okay."

Mr. Cake walked over to Pinkie. He smiled at her tried to think up something to talk about.

"Hey Pinkie! Oh, I see you got some of the new cookie flavors. Which one is your favorite so far?"

"Huh, oh, I haven't tried them just yet."

"Okay, well tell me when you do." He smiles. He looked back at his wife. She frowned and urged him on. "But why the long face? It sure is a nice day outside."

"Yeah. But I guess I'm just tired."

"Tired? Maybe you've just been inside for too long. You should go out and have some fun with your friends. Get some sunshine and fresh air."

"I got some yesterday. I hung out with Discord." Pinkie perked up noticeably.

"Oh really? What'd you do?"

"Went swimming. Had a ship battle. He wanted to turn the lake into a flooded coliseum but I thought that would be too disruptive."

"That's good. I'm so happy to hear you two are friends again! It seems like everything is getting better. You've already made up with your other friends and now with Discord! Maybe you need a cookie or two to celebrate." He nudged her.

"Okay, maybe. But I'm still on a diet." she giggled.

"A few cookies isn't going to suddenly make you gain everything back. And besides, what about when the diet ends? You'll going to have cookies then."

"When the diet...ends?"

Pinkie hadn't thought about that. It ends? What will she do after it ends? There's an end to it? But if she ends it, won't that mean she's going back to how things were before? To the same Pinkie who started this whole thing.

"Yeah, diets are only for so long. Anyway, celebrate small victories and get back to me about flavors, okay?" he smiled and walked back to Mrs. Cake. She looked relieved. Pinkie felt like her world had just crumbled.

An End to the Beginning

An end? Yes, diets ended but why? How? But to do so...

Pinkie stared at the cookies on the plate. Celebrate. Yes, she can do that. She picked one up and put it in her mouth. She chewed it. It won't ruin everything. She picked up the next one and ate it too. But what about when it ends? Another cookie. When she's happy. She threw back the lukewarm tea. She'll want to celebrate a lot then. She finished the plate. I have friends again. I look better. I should celebrate.

But what about when it ends? Will it ever end?

She walked past the smiling Cakes into the kitchen. She grabbed a box of cookies and ate it. She grabbed more and brought it up to her room. I just need to feel better. That's all. Don't think too much, just do.

She dumped her hoard onto the bed. She tore open a box and shook its contents into her mouth. Another box. More, more, more. Don't think about it all.

...Wouldn't that mean everything will go back to the way it was? To the old Pinkie?

Mrs. Cake knocked on the bathroom door.

"Pinkie? Are you okay in there?"

The sound of throwing up stopped.

"Ye-yeah! I just don't feel that well."

"Okay. There's some stomach medicine in the cabinet if you need it."

There's some medicine. There's no medicine that can help me. Pinkie thought, maliciously. She came out after a few minutes. It had been a few days now and she hadn't come out of her room.

She turned on the record player and turned up the volume. The sounds of a mare wailing about getting revenge came through the speakers. Pinkie frowned. Her stomach and throat hurt. She tossed and turned on her bed. Her straight hair tangled from not being brushed.

"It's all going to be for nothing!" Pinkie yelled. She grabbed a box and threw it. " Nothing! It's all nothing! Nothing's changed and it'll never change." She had thrown everything off the bed.

Pinkie laid on the bare mattress. She huffed and panted from the outburst.

"I need to get out of here."

She rolled out of bed. Pinkie only took a moment to rake a brush through her mane and tail. She put on a hat then left the room.

It was warm outside. The sun shone. But everything had a shade of grey to it. The colors weren't as bright. It felt colder too. Pinkie frowned. The world looked dull. She stalked down the road. The ponies on the street smiled too much and it irritated her. A dull pain came from her stomach. There was the smell of food but it only sickened her.

How can I think of eating now? Look at that. It's so gross.

Pinkie felt at a loss. No pony really noticed her. Did they not see how hurt she was? She felt weak and tired. Maybe if I laid down in the middle of the road, somepony would notice. But she didn't want anypony bothering her. She felt like a bother.

Pinkie stopped at a shop window. When had she become so thin? She remembered stepping on the scale at home. She had lost a good chunk of her weight but it wasn't enough though. There was still so much to do. Pinkie decided to pull back to home. It was safer there. All her mirrors are covered and her thoughts won't be aggravated.

"We haven't seen Pinkie in a while." Twilight remarked.

"Yeah! Aren't we suppose to be having a slumber party?" Rainbow Dash asked.

Everyone was gathered in Twilight's main room. They were having tea and talking about the latest events.

"Not to forget, she invited us to that 'Cantering Stallion' place. I'm actually a little excited to go." Applejack said.

"R-Really?" Futtershy sputtered.

"Well, it would be fun to get away from it all for a little while. Be a girl. I might even let that Grey mare pretty me up like Pinkie said." AJ blushed.

"Oh, it does sound fun." Rarity said, "Fluttershy, weren't you the last to see Pinkie?"

"Um, no. I just heard from Discord. They made up and had some fun together." she smiled.

"Hm, why don't we go and see if anything's wrong. I'm anxious myself to get going on this slumber party. I still haven't done everything in the book! I wonder what addendums she's made to the list." Twilight rubbed her hooves in excitement.

Thus the girls all when to the bakery with great expectations. A party from Pinkie always put a smile on your face. Mrs. Cake looked up from the counter to see them. She smiled and walked to them after finishing with a customer.

"Hello girls. How are you?"

"We're good. How's Pinkie? We haven't seen her in a while."

"Oh, she hasn't been feeling well. She's up in her room."

"Okay, thank you."

They didn't expect to find the top hallway so dark. It was strangely quiet even with the music coming through the door. Twilight knocked on the door. No response. She looked at the others who only shrugged. Twilight held up her hoof again and pushed open the door. They had expected to see a flu ridden Pinkie, only to find her sitting in her room crying and eating cake.

"Don't look at me. I'm gross." Pinkie sniffled through the cake. She had tear stains running down her cheeks.

"No, you're not Pinkie."

"All I wanted was someone to love me. Friends just aren't the same as a boyfriend. I wanted someone who is mine, just mine. I didn't know it would be so hard. I just can't win."

They weren't sure what had caused this turn of events. It was so confusing to see Pinkie in this state. Fluttershy ran right up and hugged her, scooting the plate away.

"Oh Pinkie, it's okay." Fluttershy comforted.

"Is this really what it all comes down to? Why you worked so hard to lose weight? Because you think it will bring you love."

"Well duh, pretty girls always get the guy. It's in every story, movie..The fat girl's just for comedy."

"Pinkie ya need someone who loves you for who you are."

"I've already gone through this with Overo. I tried that! I was myself for how long!? And look what it's got me, nothing! I don't know if I even like myself sometimes. I try so hard to get ponies to like me because I'm so afraid of being alone."

Pinkie couldn't speak after that. She didn't want to think of the memories of the lonely days on the farm. No friends, no toys. Even after getting her cutie mark, nothing changed. That first party might have actually made the nothingness worse as she had gotten a taste of real happiness. She knew what she never had and never will have. At least there, in that place of grey.

Pinkie sobbed into her hooves. Fluttershy rubbed circles on her back and cooed reassuring words. Rarity grabbed a box of tissues and the hair brush. The rest of them gathered around her.

"It'll be okay dear. Why, even weight comes and goes in fashion!" Rarity tried to reassure. She only got some blaring looks. She swallowed and smiled apologetically. She started to brush Pinkie's hair.

"Pinkie, I just don't get why you'd be doing something so silly then. It's one thing to want to change a little but it's too much to be wanting to change everything. This whole diet thing just isn't very you." AJ bravely commented.

"'It's not very pinkie?' I'm Pinkie! I get to choose what I'm like. Sorry if I decide to change the definition from time to time!"

"Begging your pardon, I didn't mean to be rude."

"Well you were! Just, I know it's just.. don't say things like that, okay? It's frustrating to hear others say 'what you're like' and 'what's Pinkie'. I can't stand others trying to dictate what I'm like. If you'll let me be who I choose to be, I'll do the same for you. I mean, I wouldn't bother you if it turns out you like to do something that seems..unlike you. Okay?" Pinkie huffed, "If you're my friends, you'll stick with me even if I change. I'll still be me, just a different me."

"It's not going to be the same though. You can't change everything about you. Then you wouldn't be you." Rainbow rubbed the back of her head, "What if..I decided I didn't like racing anymore and I don't know, took up knitting like Fluttershy. I wouldn't be the same awesome daredevil that you got to know. I'll be somepony completely different. Now, if I decided that I liked knitting as well as racing, then if would just be a new part of me. Not, um, replacing it." She waved her hoof around.

"Wow, Rainbow actually said something smart for once." Pinkie looked a little taken a back. Rainbow looked crossed between blushing in embarrassment and anger.

"Yes, and she's right. For once. You can add parts to you but you can't go around changing the fundamental parts that make up who you are. Then you really wouldn't be you. And that's not something we'll trying to force on you. We just want you to still be Pinkie at the end of the day."

"Then who is Pinkie? Who am I then?"

Rarity had finished with her mane and had started on her tail. "I think Pinkie is somepony who can think outside the box. You can come up with such ideas that I'm inspired. While some of your fashion choices are, well, 'particular' some of the basic qualities are quite unique. Sequined tulle? Glittered tulle with sequin? Who would have thought? And it's all thanks to you and your dreadful, um, dreadfully creative outfit for the Gala."

"Really? And the candy?"

"Edible clothes does sound distasteful to me but I can see a market for it."

"I think you're a really nice pony who always puts others first." Fluttershy commented next, "It's always so inspiring for me to see you work so hard to make others smile. You'll give them an extract cupcake or tell a joke. I remember the time you suddenly broke a cup and made a joke about it so no one saw I spilled grape juice all over myself." She blushed.

"I remember that! I never did like that cup." She mused.

"You always seem to know exactly what to say to make other glad. Well, most of the time. But I do enjoy seeing you so earnest about your work. And I admire your party skills as well. Ohwee, you seem to know things about a pony even they don't know. I remember you giving me that silky scarf for my birthday. I didn't realize how much I had been admiring it in the shop window." AJ said.

"Oh yeah, you always let your eyes linger on it for moment too long. It was really pretty with its picture of fall leaves. Do you still have it?"

"Sure do! It's my fancy going out scarf."

Rarity couldn't help rolling her eyes at what Applejack considered 'fancy'.

"I'm not as sentimental as all these other girls but I do love how you find time to go pranking with me." Rainbow laughed, "And you're always excited to see my new trick like it's the next triple back loop. You can't ask for a better cheering section then old Pinkie Pie."

"I do love your tricks."

"You're always there for everypony. In one way or another." Twilight started, "And as much as I hate it at times, your silliness during a serious situation does help take some of the tension off. It does put more annoyance into it, but nothing seems as bad when you're cracking jokes. You make sure everypony remembers to live. You'll drag me out of my studying binges and other from their own work. But it's done in such a way that we realize needed the break. You don't always me to get in the way."

"Wow Twilight, I didn't think it was possible for somepony to cram that many insults into one paragraph." Pinkie deadpanned.

Twilight, who mid lecture had sat up straight and tall, deflated. She slouched over, stunned.

Applejack laughed, "What I'm sure Twilight meant is that for all the negative about you, or anypony for that matter. You come out on top as having other ponies best interest at heart. It might not always work out but you try harder than anypony we know. And that's the best we could ask for."

"I feel selfish at times. Like I'm only trying to make others happy so I'm happy. That my joy comes from seeing other's joy."

"That's silly. I love seeing the crowd cheer in amazement at how awesome I am! But I don't need them feel awesome. I practice my tricks alone plenty of times." Rainbow Dash said.

"Ha, I guess this is what happens I focus so much on making others happy that I don't make myself happy. You girls are right, other ponies' happiness isn't my own. I had thought for so long that I could be happy by making other ponies happy. That they were happy cause I was happy but I was only happy cause they were. I didn't realize I had started to rely on other ponies' happiness to feel my own. I also didn't realize I would be having a sort of identity crisis." Pinkie chuckled, "Though, the main part of it is that I really wanted a special somepony I could exclusively have. Somepony I could make happy by simply doing nothing. By my being there and by being me." Pinkie shrugged, then continued on.

"I've realized how silly this all is. No one forced me into being this way. It was me. I was so sad for so long that once got the chance to be happy I went for it. I let it control everything. I let myself believe I couldn't change or I'll stop feeling good. Or that others could force me not to change. I wanted to change. But, it didn't work out the way I thought." Pinkie shook her head then started to nod, "Everypony is secondary. My parties and good nature have made my business. And they're a part of my me that I would never want to give up. I've just got to make a bigger show of what my 'public' life is and what my 'private' life is."

Pinkie felt great. She's wanted to talk about this for a while but, for obvious reasons, never felt she could.

"So, you're still going to be you right? I mean, the happy, crazy Pinkie Pie being Pinkie Pie we've all come to know, right?" Twilight was the first to ask.

"Of course silly! That's who I am. It's just not all of who I am. I'm a generally optimistic, outgoing, party loving pony! I just also like to do other things like go out and drink on Saturdays or mess with people without them knowing. It'll take time but I hope everypony will get used to all of me."

"I'm sure they will cause if they don't," R.D. swung her arms, mock fighting, "They've got us to deal with!"

Author's Note

A happy ending? Wow that's new.

I've always hated the stories that completely reject Pinkie's nature and turn her into some pony of perpetual sadness or anger. It's just not who she is. She'll be sad for a time but her want for happiness wins out in the end. Now it's just the last chapter of a sleep over, night out at the Cantering Stallion, a talk with Discord! Then the epilogue.

Do tell me if you find any mistakes or bad grammar. Leave me a comment about what you think!

Fluffy Pillows of Doom

Pinkie Pie skipped down the road. She greeted hi to the shop owner like any other day. But no, today was a special day. Cause you see, today she was going to the Cantering Stallion with her friends. That was sure to bring a smile to her face, though she wasn't sure if it was because of the thought of them at a place like that. Or because they were being apart of her expanded world. She voted for the first one.

"Twilight! Are you there?" Pinkie called out. She knocked repeatedly on the bedroom door. "Hey! We leave in half an hour!" She whined. Hmm.

"And a one, and a two and three!" She burst down the door.

"Hey!" Twilight jumped in the air from on top her bed. "Oh, um Pinkie. I'm so sorry but I'm not feeling well and ahh...!"

Pinkie bit onto her tail and dragged her down the stairs. Twilight yelled and grabbed onto the banister. With a sharp glare, Pinkie got her to let go. Pinkie skipped down the road.

"Okay! Okay! Let me up now."

Pinkie let go and continued on. Twilight brushed herself off. They reached Sugarcube Corner in relative silence. The other girls were waiting there for them on the steps of the bakery. Pinkie smiled and skipped over faster to them.

"Hi girls! You ready to go out and have the time of your life?"

"Well, I'm still not so sure about this." Fluttershy said meekly. Pinkie pulled her arm around Flutters's shoulders.

"Don't you worry for a moment. I've got you covered." She smiled widely. "Now let's go. We've got a half hour walk to Whiterston and some makeovers to do."

"Makeovers? I think I'm perfectly dressed for the occasion." Rarity said. Of course she would say that, Pinkie thought.

"It'll be fun! We'll, or at you girls, will get to dress up in sexy clothes and breakout of your shell for once. You don't have to be yourselves tonight. You can be anyone you want to be. Sometimes," Pinkie spoke in a tone meant like a whisper, "I call my self Cherry Pie. I even where a fake cutie mark."

"A fake cutie mark? Where did you ever get one of those?" AJ bristled.

"Ha, Cherry Pie?" RD snorted in laughter. "Hmm, maybe I'll be Commander Booty tonight."

"What!?" Twilight exclaimed before falling into giggles. The rest of the girls followed in some degree of laughter.

"Come on then, Miss Booty. We need to get going." Pinkie managed to control herself. They walked toward the edge of town and onto the path to the neighboring town. They were a third of the way out when Twilight started to get nervous.

"Are you suuure we should be doing this? What if something happens? We can't all be caught in deposed."

"So your precious princess will have to get her hooves dirty for once. Will you stop worrying? We get 'in deposed' in many different ways all the time. Don't jinx yourself into worrying the whole night and jump as any noise. Nobody will be able to enjoy themselves. We'll probably kick you out to wonder the streets at night if you do."

Twilight's face blanched as she looked at her in fear. The conversation turned to laughing about the dance floor and what drinks they might try at the bar.

"Wow, you actually got them out here, eh?" Grey remarked. She smirked at the gathered crowd of mares. "Come in, come in. You might find you like what you'll about to experience."

The girl walked in warily. The bandaged mare still made them fell uncertain around her. But Pinkie skipped right up and gave her a one armed hug.

"Let's pretty them up Grey!"

Applejack finally knew what a blue ribbon pie might feel like on the table before hungry judges. She tugged at her collar as she walked through down town. Stallions and mares a like looked their way as they passed. Yep, definitely a blue ribbon pie.

The rest of the girls faired in different degrees of embarrassment. Fluttershy felt like she did during the modeling fiasco only worst. Her hair had been pulled back so she couldn't even hide behind it. Rainbow Dash walked along the road with them instead of hovering by. Twilight felt stupid. Her scowl took over what place her embarrassment would have been in. They had laughed and giggled as they dressed her in their version of 'sexy librarian'. Rarity seemed the most comfortable strangely enough. It was suspected that the 'lady' of the group would put up the most fuss yet she walked with her head held high.

Applejack rolled her eyes but was still just as confused by the mare. Pinkie and Grey lead the group down the street. Pinkie jumped and hopped around as the grey mare limped slightly. She held a sort of half smile at Pinkie's excitement. It reminded AJ of Maud. She shrugged, Well that explains it a little.

The light of the Club's sign shone brightly in the early evening. Pinkie and Grey happily greeted the bouncer out front while the rest of the group hesitated back for a moment. They looked at each other in their new outfits and make up then back at the front. Pinkie smiled so widely when she looked to them. Twilight smiled back and followed her in, as did the rest of the girls.

The place looked about how they had remembered it from before. The center stage was long and protruded out into the main floor. Round tables lined the rest of the space around the stage. An open area further from the front of the stage allowed for dancing or more tables. The bar was opposite the front door and across the open dance floor. Pinkie and Grey laughed as they dashed over to their customary table. Pinkie looked back and waved over the girls.

"I wonder who's on staff tonight? Do you think Red would give one of them a lap dance?" Grey asked Pinkie. She looked around the stage's curtained off portion. It was still too early for the show to start.

"Are you sure about Red? Why not Ten Count? I think he'll do a good job."

"Ten Count doesn't move like Red does. Yeah, he's better looking. But that doesn't make up for lack of moves. You'll see." Grey smirked. "So, who does what to get the first lap dance of the night?" She asked the girls.

"Wha..What? Oh um.." Fluttershy reacted first and quickly tried to back out of it.

"Fluttershy it is!" Grey announced.

"What! Me? I..I couldn't."

"No need to get all humble. The first dance isn't all that special. It's just the kick off point. Let's get drinks."

"That I can agree on." Applejack said, "Cider all around might be a good starter." She got up from her seat to walk to the bar. Rainbow Dash followed after her. Pinkie hoped they'll get a pitcher or two.

"I do just love those shoes. Where did you get them?" Rarity remarked to a female dancer.

"These? I got them at a swap meet then took them home for a little make over."

"You decorated them yourself?" She was mildly impressed.

"Yeah, shoes are kinda my thing. Your is nice too."

"Thank you, I'm only borrowing them from a friend but at my shop in Ponyville, I have my own custom pairs." Rarity continued to chat away with the dancer about shoes and other pieces of clothing.

Grey smirked and flagged down a male waiter. She whispered into his ear. He nodded. Fluttershy whipped her head back and forth when he started to pull her aside.

"Um, ah. Excuse me?"

"Don't worry. Ol' Grey's going to pay." He said. He then gave her a couple of paper versions of bits. Fluttershy hadn't seen anyone exchanging money so she had to guess the grey mare already had it.

Pinkie laughed as Fluttershy was being lead away. "And she thinks her face is red now!"

Twilight laughed a little as well. Pinkie turned to look at her.

"Are you ready for fun?"

"I guess. Oh hey! They're back." she said. Applejack and Rainbow carried three pitchers of cider. A waiter carried the many cups on a tray behind them.

"Hey, where's Flutters?" Rainbow asked. She set down one of the pitchers in her hooves. The other one was used to start filling the cups.

"She's in a very private meeting with Red." Pinkie said.

"Very private." Grey added.

Rainbow raised an eyebrow.

A while later, Fluttershy came back with a very red face. She settled in around the table as the stage's curtain started to rise.

It was late but they had left earlier than patrons normally would. The girls had decided to stop by Grey's place to give back all the clothes. They didn't want to be walking all the way back home dressed up like they had been.

"My hooves are killing me." Twilight complained as she entered her house. The rest of the girls grumbled in agreement.

"So, what are going to do now? This is a 'bonding' day." Rarity inquired.

"I don't know. But it should be something fun." Applejack replied.

"Let's play Truth or Dare then! That'll help us to open up more." Rainbow Dash declared.

"Yeah, that sounds like fun." Pinkie agreed.

"Okay, okay, but first let's get settled in." Twilight said.

"Okay, now. Truth or Dare?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"Hmm, Truth!" Rarity replied with a grin.

"Alright then. Umm, oh! Tell us a deep dark secret."

"About what? It's kinda hard to just think up something you want to forget."

"Oh, ahh. Nevermind then. How about a dare?"

"Sure, dare!"

"Rarity, I dare you to waltz with Pinkie Pie."

"Ahh, okay then. Do you know how to waltz Pinkie?"

"Yeah! A little."

"Come here. Now hoof right here, hoof right.. here Pinkie. Good, now right foot forward. No! Right foot, not back."

They giggled as Rarity awkwardly moved around the floor with Pinkie. Rarity's smile was strained yet Pinkie didn't noticed. She was a little more interested in keeping her feet from stepping on Rarity's.

"Okay, I think we can leave that be. We can..practice later at my house if you want."

"Oh boy, really?" Pinkie grinned. Rarity's expression softened and she nodded.

"Alright then, who's next?" Rarity asked.

They were laying around in a circle in Twilight's room. The makeshift nest of pillows and blankets provided comfort from the wooden floor. Fluttershy blew on her cup of hot chocolate. A fresh pitcher of it stood on the table nearby.

"How about...Pinkie! I dare you to see how many marshmallows you can stuff in your mouth." Rainbow Dash said.

"Now just wait a moment there Dashie, I don't want to be wasting all the marshmallows. Leave some for the rest of us!" AJ said. Pinkie frowned.

"No, I don't want to eat all the extra calories anyway. Let's leave it for cubby bunny later. I'll be the ref."

"Pinkie." Twilight groaned, "Don't be like that. We're supposed to be having fun."

"We are having fun! Just no excessive sugar, alright? I don't want to gain everything back." she defended.

"Huh, fine. How about we see how many things you can fit into your mane? That'll be interesting to see!" Rainbow Dash said.

"How about no? I don't want to do that." Pinkie's mood soured.

"But Pinkie! It'll be fun. How about see what can make your Pinkie Sense go off?"

"No, no, no! I don't want that! How about a normal dare?"

"Normal? Why do you want something normal?" AJ asked.

"Maybe cause normal is nice once in a while. I want to be normal."

"You can't be normal Pinkie. You've got to love who you are. And you're far from normal."

"Have some confidence in yourself. We love how abnormal you are." Rarity said.

Pinkie screamed in annoyance at their sudden lecture, "Confidence? Love? How am I suppose to love myself when I'm always the weird one!? When I'm so different from everyone else." Pinkie jumped up from the floor and was yelling at them, "Even my own family thinks I'm a freak. They never approved of my actions or were happy about my cutie mark. And everyone in town likes to think of me as a joke! I want to be serious for a change."

"Being different is a part of life Pinkie. We don't think you're a joke, we think what you do is funny. Rest assured, being different from your family can be hard Sugarcube, but they're family. And family will want to see their own happy."

"That's your family Applejack, not mine. Everyone loves your family so much cause they're so perfect. Not all families can be so supportive and caring and stick together like they do."

"And sometimes you will never be able to understand them or they you but it doesn't mean they don't love you." Rarity started, "I know what you mean. My family is nothing like me when it come to fashion and manners. Even though they don't get me and why I'm so into high society, they still let me do it."

"It's just so hard. I just want to be able to talk to them without them constantly looking down on me or thinking I'm some stupid little girl. They don't see how serious my party planning business is. They're always trying to talk me out of it."

"My parents sometimes try to get me to come back home. They don't see the point of living on the ground with a bunch of animals. I don't mention work when I see them." Fluttershy said from behind her hair.

"I didn't know that." Rainbow Dash turned to her with surprise.

Fluttershy blushed from the attention. For a moment, she regretted speaking up. "Oh, I don't like talking about it. It's not really something to bring up. I think they worry about me. They don't want me to waste my life in a dead end job. They always ask if I have enough to eat as if I'm a pauper giving what little food I have to a mouse." she replied with a laugh at the end.

"I can only hope they are worried about me like that. That they want more for me. But I can never be sure with them. Our religion...eh their religion doesn't allow much expression of emotion. There's a lot of different restrictions on things."

"Well maybe that's it Pinkie! They care but can't show it like they want to or that maybe they don't know how to express themselves so you know they care."

"I can only hope Twilight." Pinkie said. She sat down and huffed. Twilight came over and put an arm around her, bringing her close.

"I hope too Pinkie. It not a good sigh when we've got to cheer up the Element of Laughter. You're not suppose to feel sad."

Pinkie's smile wavered. There it was again. She wasn't allowed to feel sad. How could she feel sad or down? What right did the happiest pony in town have to not be happy. It was her job. She shouldn't feel sad when there are so many other people who have it worse off. It's her duty to cheer them up and in turn, keep herself happy by seeing them happy.

"You're right Twilight, I shouldn't be feeling all gloomy like this. It's not me." Pinkie let the bitterness into her words. It's not me. It's not me. It's not me. Then who is me? That's not for me to decide.

"Pinkie." Twilight started. Pinkie shrugged off her arm.

"Nevermind. Let's just go on with the game. Truth or dare?"

"No, I want to ask you that. I want a truth from you." Twilight said determinedly.

"What! But that's not how the game goes."

"I don't care. Truth, Pinkie Pie."

"Ugh, fine. I do stuff on purpose." Pinkie said.

"What?" Rarity asked.

"Sometimes I do stuff on purpose. Like act dumb or I don't know what's going on or mess with ponies by saying weird stuff."

"You do!?"

"Well yeah, it's really funny."

"Wow, you're little evil under there." Rainbow said, poking Pinkie's head.

"What! No, I just think it's funny to see everyone over react or get confused. Especially the confused part, hehe."

"A little sadistic is more like it." RD joked.

"It's not that." Pinkie blushed.

"Hold up there Mr. J. I think we really don't give you enough credit for your wit. It seems to have gone right over our heads all this time." Rarity said with a shake of her head.

Pinkie rolled her eyes, "Right over and into 'are you stupid or crazy land'. It can really bite me in the butt when I joke around too much. But it's just so funny! No one gets it. All this time I might have been joking and they don't understand the punchline." She giggled.

Everyone was asleep by four am. It was so quiet and the air was cool. Pinkie sat on the balcony outside Twilight's room. The sky was dark with only a hint of dawn. A light breeze brushed her coat but she stayed still.

"So, had fun today? Or, yesterday I should say. Hmm, it is hard to tell. Do you consider it another day once the sun rises or after midnight?" Discord sat down next to Pinkie.

"I feel so empty inside sometimes." Pinkie stared ahead at the horizon.

"That does happen." He nodded his head.

"I always feel like I need to be filled up with... something. So often, I use the goodness of food, the happiness of laughter. Am I selfish for that? I make others laugh so I feel good. I make friends with everyone so I don't feel alone. Every corner I turn, there's somepony else I know. We smile and laugh, but then it all goes away and I'm left by myself again."

"But you're not alone now."

"Then why do I still feel this way? I grew up starving, for both food and acceptance. I still feel that need to fill the hole in anyway I can." Pinkie shook her head. "And now, I want to give up one of them but risk losing the other just so I'm not alone anymore."

He drew up her face. "You're allowed to feel sad and lonely; that's how you know the feeling of being happy. Too much of a good thing can spoil it. Why do you think I alternate which sweets I eat?" he chuckled. "Always being happy will lose its appeal. Everyday will get duller and grayer even though you're smiling. Pinkie, you want acceptance but you're unwilling to show others how you really feel."

She pulled her head away. "But how can I do both? I want to be happy and play with my friends and eat lots of good things. Do everything I couldn't do growing up! But I can't do that if I'm also sad and depressed. Sometimes, I'm able to convince myself it's just easier being a silly little girl who only knows how to party and eat cake." The tears drew lines down her face, crossing her cheeks and falling off her jaw.

"What do you want then?"

"Everything, everything and more."

"I think you can have that." She turned to look at him. Discord gave her strangely ominous look. "But all good things come with a cost. You still have to pay the register for your chocolate," He smirked. "It'll be painful, but you can have everything if you work for it. Though, I do have to warn you. Not everyone is going to accept the real you. They might never fully acknowledge that side as the real you and will be expecting you to go back to the other way. Do you think you can handle that?"

Pinkie nodded her head, "Yay, I can."

Discord smiled at her. "Now that all this serious talk is over," he said, waving his hand. "Let's go back to your place and get some rest."

Pinkie giggled. She was getting light headed from exhaustion. "My place? Why are we going to my place." she said with a raised eyebrow. Discord picked her up and flew them to Sugarcube Corner.

"Well, it just wouldn't be right of me to leave a poor, crying girl all by herself. Now would it?"

"No," she rolled her eyes, "It just wouldn't but I did have, and still have, some good friends waiting for me inside Twilight's house."

"Yes, but they are all asleep. Hmm, it's just too bad my favorite pillow it gone." he said morosely.

"Your pillow? What pillow?"

"You."

"Tsh, get used to it. Or better yet, use an actual pillow. Yay! I just realized I won't have to deal with your big head anymore." Pinkie smiled.

"Big head? Oh, you wound me."

"Good, that might help deflate it a bit."

"Ooo, a little sharp are we? I hope you're not going to be like this in bed."

"Ha! You are comical. Let's hope you're not like that in bed. I might have to kick you to the couch."

"Feisty."

They made it to the window of Pinkie's room and entered. Pinkie walked over to her dresser and used a tissue to scrub her face and blow her nose. Discord got comfortable on the bed. He made a loop with his body and settled down. Pinkie came over and climbed into the loop. He draped the blanket he had pulled off the bed over them. Pinkie used the end of his tail as a pillow. Not much else was spoken other than a quiet goodnight.

Author's Note

It's touch and go at certain points I'll admit. I'm mostly just happy to get it all done finally. Tell me if I've missed any mistakes or what you think.

Epilogue: Frosted Dreams

Cream fell from her lips even as she tried to lick it up quickly. Discord and Grey smirked at Pinkie's efforts.

"Hey, don't laugh."

They were sitting in Sugarcube Corner on a cold December afternoon. Pinkie was trying to eat her cinnamon bun successfully but the cream kept fall off.

"Are you going to finish that?" Discord reached out for her other bun. She slapped his hand away and jokingly frowned at him.

"No need to be so mean. I'll just have to get it from you later."

"And how are you going to do that?" She asked.

He swooped in and planted a kiss on her creamy lips. They were stuck for a moment as he licked at them. He pulled away with a smirk. Pinkie smiled at him.

"A kiss isn't going to get me to hand it over. You're going to hav...Hey!" She looked down at her plate to find it empty. Pinkie looked up to see Discord pop her cinnanom bun in his mouth.

"Mmmm, ghhood."

She swatted at him. "Meany! Double meany!"

"How's you new business doing, Pinkie?" Grey asked. "It's going to be strange coming here and not seeing you behind the counter anymore."

"It's great! Everyone really seems to be taking it seriously now that it's out of my garage."

"You don't have a garage." Discord mumbled through crumbs.

"It's a metaphor, oh great and wise old spirit. It's now an official Party and Event Consulting business with its own office and my own secretary!" Pinkie beamed. "I am going to miss being more involved with the events but I think it's a good trade off. I get to teach people how to have fun, in a sense." Pinkie twisted her mouth. "It is weird having to do so much paperwork though. It's a lot of contracts and invoices and dealings with outside parties which sounds like it would be more fun with parties making parties but it's not."

"Paperwork." Discord said with a nauseated tone.

"Well that does sound thrilling in its own way. I'm sorry to have missed your house warming party." Grey said. "The stupid Manehatten location just couldn't understand why you don't use the same pot to mix all the different recipes. Let's just say, there were a few nut related incidents and puffy ponies to deal with."

"It's okay. You helped me find the place." She giggled. Pinkie lingered in thought about her new home. It was a simple two story cottage style house with a porch and backyard. There was not much of a front yard as it was on a main street but the porch made up for it. Pinkie loved being able to wave to everypony as they went about their day. Her new office was on prime real estate in town square. She had painted it pink, yellow, and blue. Rarity had been insistent on helping her to decorate the inside with an 'elegant' and 'tasteful' fun theme. It had turned out great.

She sighed. She had only been living in her new house for a month now but she had yet to truly finish decorating it. Her office had been so simple. Why did her home have to be so unsatisfying? Discord eyed her.

"I'm not done furbishing my house. It's so hard."

Discord grinned, "Well of course it'll be hard. It's your own place. It has to do with all your own personal feelings and likes and dislikes and your just getting over little 'personal growth' thing."

"Personal growth thing." Grey mocked. "Wow, so wonderfully stated." She sighed, rolled her eyes, and looked at Pinkie. "But I do have to agree, this is all you. A new place is a milestone in your life. A statement of individuality and personal expression. it'll be even harder for you right now as you had just gone through a major change inside. You won't know exactly what kind of statement you want to make as you're still a little unsure of who you are. It'll get easier as you go and you might surprise yourself with what you put into your new home."

Pinkie nodded her head. "I'm so glad I'm friends with smart people. I would have just butchered that." She laughed wholeheartedly.

Twilight was in her kitchen again. She was gabbing on about the newest healthy living book that came in at the Page Master Bookstore. It laid open on the counter so she could skim over the words in case she forgot them.

Pinkie smiled through the word filled air. She knew this was just the way Twilight showed she cared. Even if it was a little annoying at times.

"Whole grain! That's always the best. I'm starting to wonder what happened to our outlook on food lately. What's wrong with the basics? Everything's processed and massed produced. Whole grain toast and bit of honey. Maybe even some butter but, not too much." Twilight sighed in victory. The pantry and refrigerator were stocked and sorted to her satisfaction.

She turned to her friend. "There you go, Pinkie! I've also put color coded tags on the pages in case you needed to look anything up." Twilight smiled gently. She wrapped Pinkie in an almost maternal hug. Patting her on the back, Twilight pulled away. "Just come by if you have any questions. Or if you just want to hang out."

"Well duh." Pinkie drawled good naturedly. "I have to swing by you house on a regular basis just to make sure you're not becoming some weird shut in. I have it in my day planner, Twi! 'Visit Twilight so she remembers there's an real world outside her house.'"

"Alright, I get it. I'll see you later." Twilight waved as she walked out the door and down the steps. Pinkie waved back. She felt good watching her friend walk away. Now, just to make sure she didn't find my emergency cupcakes.

Sunday morning came with its complimentary sunglasses. Pinkie waited by the beginning of the market place. Her scarf helped to keep some of the cold away but she would be needing a sweater soon. The stiff winds of late fall were coming in.

Fluttershy could be heard before she was seen. Pinkie chuckled at her 'oh my' as a particularly strong wind whipped by her. "Hello, Pinkie." Fluttershy said as she landed. "I hope you didn't wait long."

"Don't worry about it! I was having fun thinking out what we could do today." she spoke as they made their way down the street.

Applejack and Rainbow Dash huffed a little as they carried out the broken couch out of Pinkie's new office. Hmm, maybe it was a bad idea to bounce on it. Pinkie thought as she watched. Squeaking emitted every time she slid up and down the length of the new couch wrapped up in plastic. Rainbow Dash looked on in slight annoyance from the constant sound.

"Working hard today as well." Mr. Cake noted out loud. He and the Misses trotted up to the office with the Twins in tow.

"Hey, guys! Here already?" Pinkie jiggled on the couch letting loose more noises from the plastic cover.

"Yep, can't miss our Wednesday Picnic. They kids just love seeing you."

Pinkie hugged and snuggled with the little ones. "Aww, you guys make it sound like you never see me anymore. Isn't that right?" she booped noses with Pumpkin.

"Your business is doing so well lately. We are just so proud of you and well... we don't want to get in the way of your new freedom." Misses Cake smiled through welling up eyes.

"Prrph, you're so silly Misses Cake. You guys are my family. I'm never free of you."

The couple laughed and nodded. "Well, let's get going. Good bye Applejack, Rainbow Dash. Don't strain yourself." Misses Cake called out. The pair smiled back, calling out their own goodbyes.

Pinkie sucked in her gut as much as she could. "What's the point of 'breathable' fabric if you can't breath in it." She gasped out.

"One more second, Pinkie." Rarity reprimanded. She pinned on the last of the tulle to the corset. "Voilà la!"

Pinkie fought the overwhelming urge to groan. She let out a breath like she's never breathed before as Rarity magically loosened the ribbons.

"Thank you so much, Pinkie. You were such a great help. I just... I do hope I'm not, you know, making you feel bad what with a corset being about slimness." Rarity edged out as she floated the dress to the sewing machine. It was a very pretty outfit.

"It's okay now." Pinkie shook her head. "I'm getting better with myself."

"If you say so."

"I am! If I give up and get depressed over something as little as a garment, nothing will change. Now, can we move on to something less, hmm, life threatening?" she joked.

"The castle has just been awful lately." Discord ranted as he entered the house. He threw his scarf on the hat stand. "Some 'genius' decided to cut down on the amount of desserts in the kitchen. Apparently, sugar is bad for you." He said with sarcasm. "Pinkie, save me." He pleaded on bent knee.

Pinkie rolled her eyes and sighed through a grin. "Discord, did you want to stay in the guest room for a while?"

"Me? Move in? Oh, I thought you'd never ask!" Discord held his hands to his chest and 'swooned' with happiness onto the couch. "The princesses are so boring. And really, castles are not what they're cracked up to be."

Pinkie laughed loudly. "I only asked if wanted to stay for a while." She slapped his knee and moved into the space he made when drawing up his legs.

"Yes, but what's a while? You just never know. I might stay for a few days which turns into weeks then I'm freeloading and you're planting help wanted ads everywhere for me to find." He sprawled out on the couch a little more as if he already half owned it. "Then you find that you just can't live without me." He said in a wistful tone.

Pinkie raised an eyebrow. "I feel like you've done this couch crashing before, just without the last part."

"You wound me, Pinkie. I'm quite welcomed in some realms of reality." Discord crossed his arms and pouted.

"I'm sure." Pinkie crawled up onto his stomach and laid out as if she owned him.

"See? You're already used to me." He grinned. Discord wrapped her up into a cuddle. "Mmm, your hair smells divine as usual."

"Thanks. And you know what?"

"What?"

"I think I would miss you too much. You can stay."

Pinkie laughed as Discord cheered and threw her up into the air.

Author's Note

Finally done with the story, still might do small edits here and there. I'm very thankful to everyone who've read it. I know it's taken much too long to get done. Go ahead and point out any errors you find or even things you want me to expand upon.