Harmony Rangers

by Jetto

Rating: everyone
Tags: Princess Luna, Original Character, Comedy, Random, Adventure, Princess Celestia, Crossover, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 7140

Not quite serious parody of Power Rangers, starring Mane 6 (minus Fluttershy).

**WARNING: PARODY!**

After 994 years of imprisonment on the moon, evil witch Bendera wants to conquer Equestria with her army of Claycolts and Kaiju. The only ones who can stop her, are: HARMONY RANGERS! A group of five ponies with attitudes bearers of elements of harmony (minus Flutteshy), equiped with state of art morphers that turn them into Masked Heroes of GREAT JUSTICE!

Will they defeat evil Bendera and her army of evil kaiju? (probably yes, its not a dark fic)
Will Luna overthrow Celestia? (not really)
Will Fluttershy appear in this story? (...)
Will Cutie Mark Crusaders... ? (no)
Am I supposed to treat this seriously? (its a parody, geez)
What about Derpy? (its her fault she's not in the story)
I hate Power Rangers, dislike! (where's the question?)
Will you burn in hell for this fic? (no, I'll burn in hell for other crimes)

***
Title card provided by LoneArt8100

Published 2013-07-27 15:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-07-27 15:10:02 UTC

Episode 1: GO PONY RANGERS, FOR GRRREAT JUSTICE!

Episode 1: „GO PONY RANGERS, FOR GRRRREAT JUSTICE!”

Moon. It was empty. There were only rocks there, nothing else. Even gravity had nothing to do with it. It was extremely boring. Princess Luna tried to bring some more life there, but turns out lack of oxygen was still an issue for most creatures, so she scrapped the plan for later, when her cosmic dome schematics were completed. Only about 236 years to go, she thought with a smile. 233 if she could lay of the daily “cake time”, but it was not worth it.

So yeah, moon. Nothing interesting to see there. Except one particular big, round shaped box which has just opened, revealing somepony inside.

“Ah, after nine hundred ninety four years I'm finally free!” announced happily the mare inside it, as she jumped out of the box. She was a fairly tall gray alicorn (but not princess), with everything about her obscured by large, brown robes with many gems attached to it. Her gray mane was styled in a very outdated large buns. She turned to several other figures that were imprisoned with her.

“It's time to conquer EQUESTRIA!” she laughed evilly.

Meanwhile, in Canterlot, Equestria!

Princess Celestia gasped. She realized something was wrong, very, very wrong.

“Checkmate!” announced happily Princess Luna, as she placed her tower right next to white Princess on the board “Huzzah, the winning streak has been pentabled! Or as they say these days, IN YOUR FACE, TIA!”

Princess Celestia grumbled “Best out of eleven, then?”

“Let it be so!” agreed happily Luna

They were however interrupted, as an unnamed and totally not important to the plot, orange coated pegasus guard pony rushed into the private study of Princesses. He took a long breather and then announced.

“Princess... Princess... huff huff...” he struggled to catch a breath ”...Celestia, Princess Luna! They're back!”

This alarmed Celestia. She stood up and wore her serious face.

“The day has finally come. I dreaded it, but the Empire of Myrmydia is ...”

“No.... huff, no, not them...” said exhausted guard

“Who?” asked Luna, but nopony answered her.

“Oh, then...” continued Celestia, her face now showing anger “... Chrysalis, I knew we haven't heard the last of he-...”

“No, not her either.”

“Oh. Discord gone rogue?”

“No.”

“Sombra?”

“Hell no!”

“Tirek?”

“Negative.”

“Dragon Empire?”

“Nope.”

“Gryphon Kingdom found out I faked the peace tract?”

“No, w-wait, what?”

“Then I give up.”

“It's HER, your highness!” he announced, pointing in the direction of...

“Luna?” gasped shocked Celestia “You're Nightmare Moon again?”

“Don't be ridiculous, sister!” answered clearly insulted princess of the night “If I became Nightmare Moon again, I would've disposed of any clues, learned from previous mistakes and instead of announcing it openly, I'd hide the elements of harmony somewhere you'd never find, like a bottom of the ocean, then one by one strike the bearers in their dreams, control their thoughts and emotions so they'll hate each other, then kill one of them and shift the blame to somepony else, meanwhile do similar things to Cadance and Shining Armor, seducing him in disguise thus ruining their their love and powers, while converting the weak minded part of royal guards into my personal vanguards and when you're weakened by stress and seeking comfort in your only sister, I'd stab you in back with magical dagger that would seal your powers and send them to me, while I leave you to rot in your own dungeons with only a single screen showing how I corrupt the lands, so I'd collect the power of your misery and become invincible. Then I'd have a cake to celebrate my victory!”

Silence. Luna shifted her eyes, then smiled nervously.

“Which is a good thing I'm not evil again, right?” she smiled even wider.

The guard coughed again.

“Actually, I meant the one outside the window behind you, Princess.”

“Oh... I knew that!” she blushed and looked away.

Celestia decided to ignore this completely, and instead walked toward the window and looked outside to see...

“Oh crap, not you again!” she facehooved at the sight of a magic carpet, which had a single gaudy dressed gray mare on it “What do you want, Bondera?”

“It's Bendera!” whined the sorceress

“Whatever. I thought I sealed you on the Moon forever?”

“Yeah, because that always works.” mentioned sarcastically Luna from behind

“Shut up, Lulu!” Celestia muttered back and rolled her eyes. It really seemed like a good idea to store her prisoners on the moon back then. Then space yakuza showed up.

“Hey! Hey hey hey, don't ignore me, Celestia!” shouted Bendera with a very squeaky voice ”I have come here to exact my revenge against you and your silly kingdom!”

“Oh really?” asked Celestia, as she flew towards her, landed on her carpet and shoved Bendera with a hoof “You and what army, if I might ask?”

“What...” said Bendera, as she looked baffled at the Princess of the Sun “...what are you talking about?”

“Oh, you have the nerve to escape your prison, attack Canterlot, and you didn't bring an army? Oh come on, even queen cheese-legs wasn't that stupid!”

Somewhere out there, far away, a big, evil bug-pony queen sneezed.

“No, I have an army. It's right below us.” she pointed at the ground level of Canterlot.

Celestia looked to see where she was pointing, half expecting Bendera to sucker punch her while she wasn't paying attention, but she instantly forgot that when she noticed a giant commotion, with plenty of gray, faceless ponylike creatues assaulting the citizens of Canterlot, with most royal guards busy fighting a losing battle against a horde of incompetent, easily dispatchable minions. Out of all the fighters, only Shining Armor seemed to hold his own and smackeck them left and right.

“What the... how did I miss that!?” asked shocked Celestia. Bendera shrugged.

“I know, how DID you miss that? The noise can be heard for miles!”

Celestia looked into her deepest memory... well, one hour ago, when she decided to cast a Noise Shield spell on her room, so she could concentrate on chess game with Luna. Not a good idea. Luna had plenty of time to practice on the Moon, while Celestia was busy with creating a utopian society. And yet they still love little Lulu more. Bastards.

“You won't get away with this, Bundera!”

“IT'S BENDERA!” shouted the sorceress and shoved Celestia of her carpet. Thankfully, Princess didn't forget she has wings and used them to stay afloat.

“Whatever, your days are numbered, witch! I'll get you for this!”

“I wanna see you try!” replied Bendera, and then she disappeared in a blink. And along with her, all the armies from the streets of Canterlot, sparing the lives of countless ponies.

In the aftermath of the battle, the damage was estimated in millions of bits just for the damaged buildings. Thankfully, nopony died, and those that were injured were in no dangers of any permanent scars or being crippled. The tension was still in the air. Celestia knew Bendera- she would be back eventually, this time however it would end up in much then just property damage.

This was serious and so Celestia had to treat it as such. She needed a trump card, something that would give her an upper hoof and save her from the untimely demise. She needed a five.

“Do you have any fives?”

“Nay. Go buck.”

“Dang.” muttered Celestia, as she picked a card from the deck and added it to her hand. It was a Cadance, a princess of hearts. She had no use for her right now.

“Tia,” started Luna, as she put her cards away and looked at her sister “You know I enjoy our little game time every other day, but I get the feeling that this might be a... bad time for it.”

“I know, Lulu,” she sighed and dropped her cards completely, admitting her loss by revealing a Discord picture on her joker “but nothing I can think of could work on Bindera and her armies.”

“Wasn't it Bendera?”

“Whatever. Point is, I'm stuck. And when I'm stuck, I need to relax, and nothing relaxes me more then playing games with my little sister.” she smiled brightly. Luna smiled as well.

“What about the elements of harmony? They always seem to work just fine.”

“No, she cast a protective spell on herself and her armies. Rainbows of Harmony can't defeat her. Neither can Crystal Heart or Power of Love.”

“I see...”

They sat there for a few moments, completely in silence. Luna picked all the cards and put them back into the box. Just as she put the box away, Celestias eyes wondered around the room and noticed that two missing cards were lying on the floor. She picked them up with telekinesis. Ace of Spades and five of hearts. She looked at them for a moment. Then, her eyes widened. The cards fell on the ground, making no noise whatsoever, as Celestia gasped and smiled.

“I GOT IT!”

Several minutes later, attic above Celestia's private quarters. Ever since her return to Equestia (and senses), Luna had yet to visit this one room, convinced that all this dust, trash, dusty trash and old relics covered with dust was full of junk that couldn't be used. Unless Celestia's plan was to put life into dust bunnies and conquer Eque-, defeat Bendera with them. While the Dust Bunnies seemed like a force strong enough to defeat Benderas foot soldiers (dubbed later as “Claycolts”), they had one big weakness. They were made out of dust. You can blow them away with big enough fan. Celestia didn't have many fans, but still enough to stop her invasion with ease.

Not like Luna was going to invade her sister anyway, right?

“Aha, there it is!” announced happily Celestia, as she finally discovered a wooden box in the midst of all the garbage she kept.

“A box?” asked Luna “What's in it?”

Celestia smiled “What's inside of the box, is...” she paused dramatically. Luna looked at her with expectations. Celestia raised her hoof into the air and made a line with it “...is Great Justice!”

Luna blinked. Then sneezed, because dust “G-great Justice?”

“Indeed, my little Lulu.”

“So... what do we do with it?”

“Not we, Lulu. We can't use it by ourselves. We need somepony to use it for us!”

“Why?”

“Because...” she stopped for a moment, then blushed “...because we won't fit in the costumes.”

“Curse you, cake time,” replied Luna, her sister nodding in approval “you betrayed us yet again!”

Celestia coughed and looked at Luna.

“Luna, I need you to find me five ponies with attitu- bwahaha...” she suddenly laughed “... there is no way I can say it with a straight face. Just get me Bearers of the Elements of Harmony.”

“But you said Elements won't work?”

“Elements. But bearers are needed for something a little bit different.”

“If you say so.”

Luna turned away and walked a few steps.

“Luna, one more thing!”

“Yes, sister?”

“Not Fluttershy. Get everypony, except Fluttershy.”

Later, time not important, Canterlot Castle, Equestria, Earth. You'd think the last bit of information is irrelevant, but there was moon in this story already, so I thought I should make it clear. You never know if there was Canterlot on the moon, or a dark version of Equestria on the dark side of the moon.

“Sheesh, and they say I talk too much.” muttered Pinkie Pie, to nopony in particular “Can you please stay on topic? Everypony will think I'm crazy and talk to myself again.”

“Pinkie Pie, can you stop talking to your imaginary friends, please?” asked Twilight Sparkle, a totally normal unicorn. As in, no wings, only horn. She was purple. Thought you might wanna remember that. It might be important later “There is another threat to Equestria, we can't keep on getting distracted.”

“Okay, sorry...”

“What Ah would like ta know...” said a heavily accented pony that I don't need to name (it's Applejack) “...is why of all ponies Fluttershy wasn't invited.”

“Yeah,” agreed Rainbow Dash “I mean sure, she's weak, timid, shy, afraid of her own shadow, would only slow us down and...”

“Ah think that's enough, Dash.”

“Maybe it's about Fluttershy's birthday party?” asked Rarity. Her four friends stopped and looked at her surprised, most of all Pinkie Pie, whose jaw almost touched the floor “What? Is Pinkie Pie the only one allowed to make that sort of assumptions?”

And so they ditched the silly topic and entered the throne room, where Princess Celestia and Luna were already waiting. A fairly small wooden box stood before them.
“My dear student, I'm so happy to see you again.”

“We came as you asked, Princess, “replied Twilight Sparkle, as they all bowed

Celestia nodded and started “My little ponies, the evil sorceress Bondera...”

“Bendera.” mentioned Luna

“Whatever. That evil witch has returned from her banishment on the moon, and yes, I sent more ponies on the moon back in the days so don't ever mention it again, and she's threatening Equestria with her army kaiju.”

“What's a kaiju?” asked Applejack

“A creepy looking monster with awesome powers that has to be beaten by a morphing superhero in flashy, if sometimes gaudy, latex costume.” answered Rarity. They looked at her again, mouths agape once again. She looked at them and groaned “Is this all I'm going to do today? Say thing's you wouldn't expect me, so you'd stand there silently?”

They stood there, silently. She rolled her eyes and explained.

“Ok, so I watched a lot of weird, neighponese shows when I was a filly. Sue me.”

“R-right...” continued Princess Celestia “...it's as Rarity said, we are being attacked by monsters. And the only ones that can stop it, is you!”

And then there was a cheer. Then somepony asked about Elements and Fluttershy. Princesses explained why it's not an option. Seriously, you already know that, I don't need to repeat myself.

“So instead, I want you to use...” she opened the box and levitated its content toward them “THIS!”

They looked over their new gadgets, not exactly sure what to make of them.

“Umm, Princess, what is that?” asked Twilight, as she ogled the device from every side.

It was a, for the lack of better explanation, a giant hoofwatch, with a small keyboard and screen on it. It did not tell you about the time. But it did come with different colors, which matched their coats almost perfectly. Almost, Applejack had a yellow, even though she was orange. And Twilight had red, for some reason.

“These are called morphers. First, strap them on your right forehoof.”

They did so.

“...then, when you want to transform and get it's powers, just type 555 on the keyboard, enter and that's pretty much it.”

“Wait, just that?” asked Rarity “No keywords, no roll call, no redundant but incredibly stylish moves?”

“What moves?” asked Rainbow Dash

“Why of course, it was the best part! It was like a dance, a short one, but full of sudden movements, emotions, grace...”

And so she went on. She even presented one such choreography herself, which included standing on her hind legs, moving her front hooves in a half circle, spinning around once, putting one hoof forward and the other, one with morpher on, to her face, then shouting “Let's morph it!”, then enter the password. She then added that once transformed, they had to each introduce themselves, complete with unique catchphrase and pose for each of them. Hers brushing her mane away (even though it was hidden in helmet), saying “Style is justice, Harmony White!”, and then there was going to be explosion behind her.

“I'm assuming my costume will be white, right?” she asked, looking at the morpher “That's how it usually works in the show.”

They stood there silently once again. Rarity was slowly getting used to it. Rainbow Dash turned to Twilight.

“I'm sorry for calling you egghead.”

Rarity pouted and turned away, insulted.

Suddenly, they were interrupted by doors to throne room opening with a bang! The aforementioned, completely not important, orange pegasus guard rushed through, towards the princesses, but stumbled along the way and rolled his way forward, until he accidentally hit the surprised purple unicorn and rolled a few more feet with her. Once they stopped, he found himself atop the very much blushing Twilight Sparkle, her head between his hooves, too shocked to react. They looked themselves into each others eyes and the entire world around them stopped for a moment. The guard lost his helmet on his way, revealing a short, blue hair standing up.

Yes, it's Flash Sentry, get over it.

“Umm, I-I...” started the guard

“N-no, i-it's f-fine, I-I do-...”

And they kept on stuttering for few seconds. Some found it adorable, others annoying. They were finally separated by Princess Luna coughing.

“Did you bring a message?”

The guard suddenly took a hold of himself and flew away from Twilight and saluted to Princesses.

“Y-yes ma'm, the witch Boomdera...”

“Bendera.” corrected him Pinkie Pie

“Whatever, she's in Canterlot again! And she has some kind of monster with her! We're trying to fight it, but we're no match for them!”

“What about Captain Shining Armor?” asked Celestia

“He's busy keeping the nearby dam from cracking, while his Monster Eliminators Team of Awesome (META, in short) evacuates the nearby settlements.”

“Drat, of all times!” muttered Celestia. She then looked over her little ponies “This is it, Harmony Rangers. Your first mission.”

Applejack and Twilight gulped. Dash and Pinkie Pie high hoofed. Rarity kept her excited squeek to herself, because Fluttershy wasn't there.

“Buahahaha, fear me, little ponies! Fear your doom!” shouted the evil witch, as she walked through city of Canterlot, with bunch of ponies running away from her and her incredibly ugly kaiju.

“TAR YOU! TAR YOU TOO!” shouted the monster, as he shot his hot tar around the entire city.

You see, kaiju take many forms and shapes, some looking more equine, some... not so much. This one was pony shaped, but made almost entirely out of tar. Yes, tar. Black, hot substance used mostly to fix roofs. He did wear yellow galoshes, so he didn't leave any hoofprints on the street. Every pony he encountered ended up lying on the floor, covered in the black sticky substance, completely ruining everyponies clothes and manes. And this being Canterlot, made for a pretty big crime.

“Not so fast, Bond-Air-Ah!”

“Pinkie, her name's Bendera.”

“I know, Twilight. I'm taunting her!”

“Who dares to interrupt me?” asked the evil witch. She looked up the two house nearby and noticed a group of ponies. Five mares stood there, the light of the sun shone directly behind them, blinding anypony who dared to look directly at them, or rather their silhouettes. In a word, it looked awesome.

“Tia, you didn't have to move the sun just for that.” mentioned Luna, who stood on the other roof right next to her sister.

“It's over, witch. We won't let you terrorize the innocent ponies...” started Twilight

“...and the other ones!” added Rarity, pointing at the ground, where Prince Blueblood was lying, covered in hot tar, whining mostly out of misery of having his clothes ruined. She couldn't help but giggle.

“... yeah, sure,” Twilight rolled her eyes “because we will stop you!”

“We will stop you?” said Rainbow Dash, looking at Twilight “Why not just say 'stop evildoer' while we're at it, huh?”

“Oh give me a break, this is my first time doing this hero gig.”

“Oh really, miss Mare-Do-Well?”

“Well, I didn't need to talk back then, you know.”

“Whoa there, sugarcubes!” Applejack went between the two “Save it for the bad guy, okay?”

Bendera on her part looked at the five ponies and laughed.

“Oh no, how am I ever going to deal with five ponies?” asked sarcastically evil witch “How about... how I always do it!” her horn glowed and a bunch of faceless, gray mooks appeared from the thin air. About a few dozen of them looked at the building where Harmony Rangers were standing. Some of them had guns though, so it seemed like some danger was there.

Twilight looked at her friends. She reached for her morpher and was almost ready to type the extremely easy passcode, when Rarity stopped her.

“Wait!” she shouted quickly “Not now.”

“What? Why not?”

“Darling, look at those poor excuses for an army,” she pointed her hoof at Claycolts preparing to shoot them with dozens of bullets per second “hardly worth the effort of morphing, don't you think?”

“I don't know, they have hoofguns and all...” Twilight scratched her head, but couldn't quiet argue

“Well, they don't look mighty strong to me.” nodded Applejack. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie agreed.

“So then, what do we do?” asked Twilight. Rarity smiled and walked toward the edge of the roof.

“What every proud sentai does in this situation,” her eyes glowed as she turned to her friends with a smile “we fight!” and then she jumped down, fearing no height or the fact that just as she left the roof, bunch of bullets passed through her, not a single one even so much as scratching her body. Rainbow Dash shouted a battle cry and flew right after Rarity, with Pinkie Pie happily joining the two. Still not a single bullet touched any of them.
Twilight hesitated and took a step back, but was stopped by a hoof reaching her shoulder.

“Afraid, pardner?” asked Applejack, looking her deep in eyes, smiling slyly. Twilight opened her mouth, but instead of saying anything, she smiled back at her.

Meanwhile, on the ground, Rarity managed to land without a scratch, because she weakened the fall by falling on one Claycolt, crushing him completely. She then rolled out of the reach, jumping and kicking two other Claycolts, making them fall and drop their weapons. Right next to her, five more mooks were taking aim at Rarity, using her moments of recovery, but failed to shoot a single time as a shockwave, caused by diving pegasus, pushed them forward, making them collide with each other or anything on the streets. At the center of the shockwave stood proud Rainbow Dash, preparing to fight of the ones that still had any fight in them. Pinkie Pie on the other hoof, was already in the middle of it, swaying and jumping around, under and above the claycolts, making their attacks harm each other, instead of her or her friends.

“If I was alone...” answered Twilight Sparkle, looking amazed at her friends down the street “I would probably run away, looking for Princess or Shining.”

“Yer not, sugarcube.” interrupted Applejack, as she made a few steps toward the edge “And yer never'll be, so long as we live. Ya got mah word for it. And ya know I don't like ta lie.”

Twilight snorted and joined Applejack at the edge of the roof. “Together?”

“With you, Twily?” she fixed her hat “Always!”

And so they jumped in a complete unison, Twilight shooting several bolts from mid air, striking Claycolts at random and putting them down, while Applejack dropkicked one claycolt so hard, he flew past the area, taking several others along with him, until they all crashed through nearby windows of a cafe. Safe to say, it was...

“...so awesome!” admitted Celestia, as she looked from above at the fight scene. Luna nodded.

“Yes, you picked the right ponies for this job, sister. But...” she stopped and looked at Bendera and her Tar Monster “... the big ones didn't make their moves yet.”

“You fear too much, Lulu. It'll all be fine.”

“I hope so, sister.”

Back to the battle ground, after an intense, if not exactly challenging fight, all the claycolts were down for the count, dissolving into nothingness.

“Easy peasy, not that sleazy!” announced Pinkie Pie, clapping her hooves.

“Well then, four dozen down,” said Rainbow Dash, then looked at the witch and monster ”two more to go.”

“Careful Rainbow, this one seems stronger!” warned her Rarity. They all faced the tar monster, not quite wanting to get closer or touching it with their bare hooves “Well, this might be the first time I'm glad I'm naked in the middle of Canterlot.”

Bendera laughed maniacally.

“Hahaha, you think I care about your little act here? You'll pay for defeating my Claycolts! Tarniculous, GET THEM!”

“Wait, she named him Tarniculous?” Pinkie Pie snorted

Tarniculous rushed toward mane 6 (minus Fluttershy) and struck a few times, ponies avoiding getting hit and covered in slimy substance by mere inches. They all tumbled away and formed a line.

“All right, I think this might be a good time to change.” announced Rarity. Everypony nodded, with Twilight (who conveniently was placed in center) taking charge as she stepped forward.

“All right everypony,” announced Twilight, as she raised her right hoof to her face “it's time to transform!” and she was about to punch the password, but...

“WAAAAAIT!” screamed Rarity “Did you forget what I said earlier? The poses! The drama! Twilight, we can't just avoid it!”

“Why not?” asked Rainbow Dash

“Because its TRADITION!” answered Rarity “Like no magic on Winter Wrap Up, like candy on Nightmare Night, some things are just sacred! Even if they make no sense!”

“Rarity, I'm not sure this is a good idea.” said Twilight

“Twilight, are you a fan of Denjimare?” asked Rarity. Twilight looked puzzled around her other friends, but they shrugged. “As I thought. This is a part of our powers, we must respect it!”

“So, basically...” said Applejack “we have ta follow the cliches?”

“YES!” screamed Rarity “How are we going to win, if we avoid cliches?”

Twilight wanted to say anything, but there was no arguing Rarity, so she shrugged with defeat.

“Cool, we're gonna dance the power dance!” announced happily Pinkie Pie

“Well, fine, but only this once. Totally not awesome.” added Rainbow, following the two.

“Well, might as well try, nothin' to lose anyway.” Applejack shrugged and pushed Twilight, who groaned silently.

“Okay girls, ready?” asked Rarity, and got a loud “YEAH/EYUP/SURE WHATEVER/YIPPIE” as a response. And then it happened.

(this part requires a soundtrack, so go

and only then read further. Alternatively, choose your favourite morphing theme)

They all stood on their hind hooves, made a half circle with their front hooves, then spun around once, clockwise, then put left hoof forward, with left next to their heads. They held that position for a second, before they all yelled.

“LET'S MORPH IT!” followed by punching three digits into their morphers. Five. Five. Five. Then enter. And then, magic of technology happened! Their morphers all flashed in their colors, the glow became a liquid white light, which slowly spread over their entire bodies, and once not a single part of them was exposed, it solidified and changed into a latex-like substance of a color of their respective morphers, now resembling a full body suit. On their heads appeared a helmet, with black visors over their eye levels. Each ponies visor took shape of their cutie marks, which looked a bit awkward, but from their perspective, it fit them perfectly.

“Woah...” was the initial reaction of all the ponies, as they observed their bodies in full suits, admiring how comfortable they were, how they felt so much stronger and faster and how they couldn't be stopped right now.

“Okay, now let's kick his a-” started Twilight again, but once again, was interrupted by Rarity

“No way darling, you're forgetting about something else.”

“Oh, do we have to?”

“TRADITIONS!” said Rarity. Despite the fact that they couldn't see her eyes with the visor on, they still felt intimidated by her gaze. Twilight rolled her eyes and they once again formed a line.

“Oh, oh, me first, me first!” bounced Pinkie, as she coughed and announced to her enemies.

“Laughing in the face of danger!” she somersaulted “Harmony Pink!”

Next in line was Rainbow Dash, who thought for a moment, then raised her head and said her line.

“Fast as a Rainboom!” she flew up, then landed with a large shockwave following “Harmony Blue!”

Rarity knew exactly what she wanted and couldn't help but squee, before doing her part.

“Style is justice!” she brushed her nonexistent hair “Harmony White!”

Applejack scratched her head, noticing that her stetson was gone, but couldn't be bothered with it right now, as time was running out.

“Um, Pain is Power!” she punched the air a few times “Harmony Or- I mean, Yellow!”

Finally it was Twilight's turn, as she looked at other four and made her own catchphrase.

“Friendship is MAGIC!” her horn glowed with few fireworks “Harmony Red!”

Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash groaned and looked at Twilight with annoyance. Somewhere in the distance two Princesses facehooved. Twilight looked at everypony surprised.

“What? What did I do?”

“You did not just say that...”

“Twiley wiley, that was super weak!”

“Seriously, even Ah was more original!”

“Lame-oh.”

Twilight pouted and crossed her hooves. “Hmpf, who asked you?”

“Well, whatever, there is still one more thing we need.” announced Rarity. Everypony groaned again.

“What? What THIS time?” asked seriously annoyed Rainbow Dash, eager to dash into action already.

“Group shot!” said happily Rarity.

They all sighed and once again stood on their front hooves.

“HARMONY...” they all shouted, spun around, and finally made a finishing sentai group pose. Let your imagination work for once.
“RANGERS!” And then, giant explosions appeared behind them, five different colored ones. They all looked behind startled, Rarity gladly admiring her childhood dream, while Rainbow Dash...

“Oh... my... lord...” she said slowly “THIS IS AWESOME!”

“I knew you'd like it, Rainbow. That's why I insisted on it.” said proudly Rarity

“Well, it's pretty neat, sure...” started Twilight, but Rainbow flew to her and grabbed her by shoulders and looked deep into eyes. Well, visor.

“No, not awesome as in 'two steps above cool'. This IS awesome!”

“I don't follow...”

“This is pure and undiluted awesome! It's like, you make tea, you add sugar to make it awesome... except no tea, just sugar!”

“Oh, my favorite!” added Pinkie Pie.

“This is...” continued Rainbow Dash “...so awesome, it leaked out and exploded behind our back! I LOVE IT!”

“Ekhem, not forgetting something?” they heard Bendera behind them. They instantly remembered and each assumed battle positions.

“Okay, let's kick their plots!” announced Twilight. She turned to Rarity “I'm not forgetting anything else, am I?”

“No, go on, we're okay.”

“Good. NOW LET'S GO!”

And so they did. They all jumped at Tarniculous with cries of warfare and a battle begun. Applejack quickly found out, for her own good, that her new boots were keeping her hooves from getting stuck in sticky tar, which in turn meant she could pummel the monster all she wanted, and she did. She threw a bunch of punches at Tarniculous, and while one hit was barely a scratch, a bunch consecutive blows hurt a lot more, until he managed to swat her away with a backhoof strike. However, then he had to deal with Pinkie Ranger Pie jumping on his back and riding him like a horse on a rodeo. He would've struck her down this instant, if Rarity didn't find several scattered gems around, picked them up with telekinesis and shot them in his direction like bullets. Normally, it wouldn't do much, but suit augmented her magical powers significantly and made it hurt like heck. Didn't help that when he tried to shoot tar at her to get her our of her hide, he was suddenly bound by purple glowing chains, courtesy of Twilight Sparkle, who held him in place just long enough for Rainbow Dash to get high enough, that eventual drop kick from that height hurt a lot (Pinkie jumped away just in time, in case you wonder), throwing him back and making him roll into a streetlamp. Tarniculous sat there, his head dizzy, and a bunch of little, colorful costumed ponies running around his head, which he swatted away like flies.

Rarity helped Applejack stand up and soon after all five were once again together, cheering on their victory. The opposite was true when it came to Bendera.

“Aaargghhh, I'm getting a headache just looking at it! Tarniculous, stop fooling around and SMASH THEM! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!”

Tar monster shook his head and growled at the Harmony Rangers. But instead of rushing to attack them, he started inhaling the air around him, becoming slightly bigger and bigger, inch by inch.

“Uh-oh, what's goin' on, Twi?” asked Applejack. Twilight, and subsequently all others, turned to Rarity for answers, but she just shrugged. The monster finally grew to four times his size, now easily reaching about eight feet tall, which looked pretty scary, all things considered.

The monster once again screamed at the five and raised his hoof up, which now stretched in both directions, now more resembling a giant swatter. For ponies. Made out of tar. Rarity was starting to feel sick from imagination alone. And then he slammed the giant hoof-thingy into the Harmony Rangers, crushing the ponies under it along with streets and everything under it.

And they all died.

Not really, as when the tar finally dissolved from the ground, one thing stood out from it. A small, purple dome made out of raw magical energy. One created by a certain purple wearing red costume, unicorn.

“Nice, Twilight!” Rainbow Dash patted her friends back and everypony cheered once again, as Twilight was exhausted, but glad it worked as planned.

“Grrrrr, pesky Rangers!” shouted Bendera once again “No matter, my cute monster can do it all day. Can you?” and as on cue, Tarniculous started inhaling air once again.

“Drat, I can't keep this up, even with this suit,” admitted Twilight “we need a plan, fast!”

“Sonic Rainboom boosted with super suit, anypony?” asked proudly Rainbow Dash

“No, there are still ponies trapped here,” said Rarity, as she pointed at still panicking Prince Blueblood, fully wishing she had a sponge or something so she could shut him up already “we can't risk their lives!”

“Oh, maybe we could ask the narrator for help?” asked Pinkie Pie, not realizing that I was as helpless as they were at this moment. I can talk and even drop hints, but I don't write this story, so I can't drop a deus ex machina whenever I wish. “On second thought, maybe not.” admitted Pinkie with defeat.

“If we had some kinda weapon, more firepower...” said Applejack, as she looked around for anything that could be used as a weapon, but finding only tar and ruins.

Suddenly, a figure appeared from the distance. She spread her wings, so her body was entirely in shadows of the sun. The shadow soon appeared to be...

“Lulu?” asked Celestia, as she just now noticed that Luna disappeared from her side a while ago.

“Princess Luna? What in TARnation?” asked Applejack. Pinkie Pie giggled at the unintentional pun.

“Harmony Rangers, hear me out,” and so they did and she continued “back when I was trapped on the moon, I designed a weapon. It's a very powerful one, that's can't be fully utilized unless its used by five ponies, whose hearts are connected.”

“Oh, okay then, bring it here.” said happily Twiligh

“But I must warn you, if you are not working as one, it'll cause a greater disaster then one you try to avert...”

“Yeah yeah, yap yap, just give it to us already!” interrupted Rainbow Dash, as she noticed Tarniculous getting bigger every second

“Then so be it, just be warned, if you don't synchronize perfectly...”

“We're past that part, okay?”

“...you must work as a single being, connected by the most pure feeli-...”

“JUST GIVE US THE DAMN WEAPON, ALREADY!” they all shouted in perfect harmony, hearts perfectly connected, emotions synchronized and matching perfectly each other.

“Okay, fine, here you go.”

Luna's horn glowed with dark energy and soon after, a dark thing materialized in front of the rangers. From the lack of the better term, it was a giant metallic arbalest, but without a string, instead with five handles- two sticking out from both sides, and one on the back of it. Each handle was colored with their respective colors, red being in the back, white and yellow on the right, blue and pink on the left side of it. It screamed “awesome”.

“Woah, where did you get that thing?” asked Rainbow Dash, as she dashed toward the weapon and examined a handle of her color, with other Rangers doing the same.

“Well...” started Luna, instantly getting nervous and sweaty “...I built it myself.”

They all stopped and looked at her, mouths hanging. Not that she could tell, with helmets on.

“You know, when you have one thousand years, alone on the moon, angry at your sister, you kinda start building weapons of mass destruction. One of them is about twenty years of 'not being bored out of my skull', and I can't play imaginary chess all the time.” admitted Princess of the Night. The Rangers decided to not comment on that and just be glad they had something for themselves against a powerful monster. However...

“Umm, how do you turn it on?” wondered Twilight, as she looked around for something resembling a switch.

“Oh, you need a password to boot it... up...” Luna fell silent and started blushing. Meanwhile, a giant tar hand was growing and forming into a giant swat.

“Princess, we don't have time, just tell us the password already!”

“...umm, the password... is...” she whispered something else, but nopony could hear her. Especially not when a giant tar monster was growling and almost ready to strike.

“Come on, just tell us already!”

“It's... the password is...” Luna hesitated for a moment, but then looked at the desperate five mares, waiting for her signal to fire a weapon of salvation. All she had to do was say it. But how could she? Not after all this time, not after what happened between her and her...

“LUNA!”

“OKAY, FINE!” she cried and finally said it “The password is CELESTIA HAS A BIG BUTT!”

A jaw-drop of massive proportions was heard from a great distance. The entire equestria gasped or sneezed, though nopony in the world had idea why. Celestia herself just teleported near Luna and looked at her, really pissed off.

“Lulu, take that back!”

“I'm sorry Tia!” she nuzzled her sister and started crying a proverbial river “I-I didn't mean to, I-I was m-mad, and crazy and... and... I'M SO, SO SORRY!” she cried a little more. Celestia put her wing over her and nuzzled her back.

“Don't worry Lulu, it's not your fault,” she smiled to her sister “it was all Nightmare Moon and she's gone now. Besides, it's all cake time fault.”

“Curse you, cake time!” said Luna, between her stream of tears. Rainbow Dash would probably roll her eyes and say something snappy, but she was a bit too busy with a giant, voice activated arbalest. More precisely, with red costumed mare at the main trigger.

“Twilight, any time now!”

“I-I can't...” Twilight's hooves were shaking “...I-I won't...”

“TWILIGHT, FOR THE LOVE OF SUN, JUST SAY IT!”

A giant tar hand was already at its peak height, now ready to slowly descend, accelerating on its way and smashing five puny ponies under it, maybe even lucky enough to hit Princesses along with them.

“OKAY, FINE!” announced Twilight. All eyes were now on her- Princesses, her comrades, the entire population of Canterlot trapped under (now dried and solid) tar, Bendera, Tarniculous striking them with his giant hand like thing.

“CELESTIA HAS A BIG BUTT!” shouted Twilight through her tears and against any blockades she had in her mind. The control lights on the arbalest lit up, all monitors were showing the “READY” signals. Five mares shouted in perfect unison. And as if in perfect unison, they searched their own feelings, grabbed a part from Twilight's heart and screamed it along with her.

“BUT WE LOVE IT ANYWAY!”

And then there was a giant blast, big explosion and everything went silent.

Few hours later, Prince Blueblood was finally free from his tar prison but crying once he noticed that his favorite spa was destroyed by the fire of 'Big Butt'.
At least that's how they named their new giant arbalest.
Celestia admitted that cake can't be evil and if her plot was too big, she still had teleportation for any doors that couldn't fit her.
Rarity was against that name, but finally shrugged it of when she realized that they were going to get more and she took dibs on their names.
Pinkie Pie joined Princesses for the cake time, yet she gained no plot at all.
Rainbow Dash went to the secluded mountain area to train her Sonic Rainboom in new upgraded form.
Applejack went back to farm, because she was Applejack.
Fluttershy still didn't appear in this story.
Princess Luna admitted she still had more weapons of mass destruction and was willing to part with it and give it to Harmony Rangers... as soon as she removes the voice commands.
Unnamed guard was Flash Sentry, he did nothing.
Shining Armor saved the entire area from flood, fixed the dam and became the most awesome hero, outside of Harmony Rangers.
Cadence cheered for him.
Bendera went back to her secret hideout and plotted her next attack with new monster.
Tarniculous died and won't be coming back, until the inevitable “resurrecting old monsters for the movie” plot.
Claycolts also died, but Bendera had reserves.

Also, this was episode 1 out of 49. Plus two inevitable movies, not including crossovers. Have fun.

...but wait, what happened to Twilight Sparkle?

Later, in Princess Celestia private quarters

“Y-you're kidding me, right, Princess?” asked Twilight, not quite believing what she was just told by her mentor. Her mother figure. He ideal. He boss. Her everything!

“I'm afraid not, my student. It's the only way.”

“B-but... but...”

“Please, I hate to do it as much as you do, but for the sake of protecting Equestria and defeating Byndera...”

“Bendera.”

“Whatever. Twilight, will you do it? For Equestria? For your friends? For... me?”

Twilight Sparkle looked at the mysterious bottle she was given by Princess. She sighed deeply at the bottle of a natural, toxic-free red dye. That would make her a real leader. A real Red Ranger.

TO BE CONTINUED!

Author's Note

How many references to PR, Sentai and Tokusatsu did you count? Brag in the comment section!

Those who think that I will write all these 48 episodes... haha, no :P Not an option.