The feelings of others

by SoggySalamander

Rating: everyone
Tags: Sad, Main 6, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Princess Celestia
Length: 5312

Celestia is in need of rest, yet somepony has a few things to share before she does.

A thousand years of raising both sun and moon can take its toll on a pony. There comes a point when you just need to rest.
Celestia, after over a thousand years of rule, is in need of just that. As she closes her eyes, she is presented with visions of ponies she has met, which if life had been different, she would have liked to call friends. Visions which all seemingly have something in common. Then there's the constant nagging from an all too familiar voice.
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I guess this straddles the line between sad and comedy, but as I'm not allowed to pick both, I just went with sad. Meh.

Published 2013-07-27 17:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-07-27 17:10:02 UTC

Chapter 1

All around was black. It didn't frighten her though. No, it felt more sad. Lonely.

A form appeared in the darkness. Even to her, she could plainly see the beauty before here eyes. It was a white pony, tall and slender, with wings and horn both and an ethereal mane that flowed on a non-existent breeze. On it's face, it wore the all too familiar look of somepony who knew more than she was saying.

Looking down as if to inspect a hoof, she gave a little start. Of course she saw nothing. She was just a consciousness after all. She looked back up at the pony in front of her, noticing it raise it's head as she did so.

This was not exactly what she had expected when the time to rest came. The darkness all around could have been worrying to another, but not to her. She welcomed it. She was sister to the night after all.

What she wasn't too fond of was the prospect of spending any great length of time looking at herself. It was just plain weird.

"What do you see?"

The voice came out of nowhere, yet she did not start at it's sudden appearance. She knew instantly that such a voice would never mean her any harm. Not anymore.

"I see a ruler, a princess. I see a pony who has lived a long life and one who has made many mistakes along the way. I see all of the possibilities that could have been if only she had done things differently, made different choices. I see a pony. Alone."

There was a sense of.....something in the air, dissatisfaction perhaps, but the voice said nothing.

The image of the white pony faded and darkness returned.

She sat there for a while in thought -or what she thought to herself as sitting, as without a physical form, sitting didn't mean a great deal. Why had she been shown that image? Why ask what she saw? She didn't suppose it mattered in the long run.

As her thoughts began to fade, leaving her as empty as the space around her, the scenery changed. Not just a small portion taking the form of a pony, but the entirety of what she saw. In every direction she moved her would be head, there was something to see. Most notably downwards, as she found herself in the air above the majority of it all.

The first thing that struck her was the colour green. Every direction there was green. Green grass lands, and a large forest a short way off. Even the small cottage she could see was mostly covered in green moss or other such flora. Asides from a small dirt patch, the only other colour that stuck out from her place up high, was a small blue stream that ran in front of the building.

It was then she saw a yellow pony with pink mane and tail surrounded by animals. Of course she knew who this was straight away.

"What do you see?"

"What is this? Is it real? A dream perhaps?"

"Yes."

She attempted to roll her eyes without much success.

"It is a memory of sorts. A past event at least. Just some things I want to show you."

"Is there something important that happens here at this time?"

"Not really, no."

"Then why?"

"What do you see?"

She sighed mentally.

"I see a peaceful home on the edge of the forest. I see the Element of Kindness, Fluttershy. I see her feeding all of the animals that she cares for so much. I see a pony who gives so much love to others that she holds little back in reserve for herself. She's a very interesting character. She hides a part of herself from the world though, showing it who she is but hiding what it does to herself. What I see is a lonely mare.

"You disappoint me."

She could tell that there was no such disappointment in the voice.

"I really thought I had started with an easy one."

"What do you mean?"

"Quite simply, you are wrong. That is not what you see."

"Oh? And what is it that I do see then?"

"You see a gentle soul. Kind to a fault you might say. She gives of herself in any way she can to help improve the lives of those around her, even at the cost of herself. You see that to her, every other creature, pony or not, deserves whatever she can give, more than she does herself. You see that driving her very being....is love. A love for not only ponies but also the creatures others would look right past."

She nodded mentally to herself. It was true. There were very few ponies out there, be it from the past, present or likely even in the future, that would have the caring nature of Fluttershy. She was thankful that this timid little pony was a defender of the land she loved and even more so that she had gotten to know her the little she had. She would very much have liked to be on the receiving end of that love.

As the yellow pony made her way into her cottage to do whatever it is she does, the darkness returned.

"You said first. Do you intend to show me other such....events? What is the purpose?"

*Silence*

Again she mentally sighed and the darkness once again began to change.

At first she thought that she was to be shown the previous scene again, perhaps to catch something she missed. Perhaps something important did happen at that point in time and she was just unaware? That thought vanished though as the images around her fully came in to focus.

Yes there were similarities. The major one being that all around her was once again green. She was also once again floating above it all in the air. However, the trees below were not the closely clumped trees of a dense forest and the open expanses were not mostly grass lands. Also there was no stream. No, what she saw instead was a very expansive apple orchard.

There wasn't just green of course. There were also browns, reds and yellows where roads, buildings and crops were scattered around the place. None of these were the cause of the smile that she could feel growing on her invisible face though. No, the cause of that was the group of ponies she saw down below.

"What do you see?"

"I see," she paused. What was the point of all this? "I see the Element of Honesty, Applejack. I see her sister and brother, Applebloom and Big Macintosh. I see her Granny Smith. I see a family...." she trailed off.

"Yes?"

"I see a broken family, a group of ponies who day by day put on a strong face. A mask if you will, which will allow them to face the world. I see loss and sadness."

"You really have gotten quite depressing, you know that? Look again. Perhaps not so deeply, yes? What do you see happening right now?"

A bit of an odd question she mused. She looked more closely. "I see ponies working themselves to the bone to feed themselves and make a living. They do seem to be making the most of it though, it does look like they are enjoying themselves on the surface. I see Big Macintosh has been injured somehow, not for the first time. He should really be more careful. I see now that this will be a very long and difficult day without him, the small Applebloom and elderly Granny Smith doing their best to fill in. I see hard times ahead."

Again there was that feeling of something as she finished her words.

"What?"

"You're wrong."

"No doubt you are going to correct me?"

"You do indeed see a family.Not a family broken, but a family whose bonds have only become stronger with the experiences they have shared together. I see a family who will do anything for one another, no matter how difficult things get. In it all....I see love. The love of a family member really is something special, isn't it?

The trees, fields and family in front of her faded. She did indeed see love. Oh, how she would like to be a part of it. Of course she had her sister, and of course they loved one another. They both knew that, but there was just so much more out there she would have liked to be a part of.

"Why show me this?"

There was no response.

Thinking back on what she had just seen, she couldn't help desire fill her. Desire to casually stroll through those beautiful trees and fields. Desire to have a relaxed conversation with the group of ponies which resided at Sweet Apple Acres, to help them and bask in the afternoon sun as they talked about nothing in particular.

Time passed by, or at least she assumed it did, and as a fresh wave of sadness washed over her, the darkness again began to fade. Again a full scene started playing around her and again there was life in the centre of it.

Three little fillies laughed and played on the outskirts of Ponyville.

"What do you see?"

"Children. I see three young fillies up to no good." She said this with a smile in her voice. "Three very special fillies at that, though they don't quite realise how special just yet."

"Indeed. What else?"

"I see childish fun. I see innocence. I see a past from far too long ago. Time really does wear everything down doesn't it?"

"It doesn't have to."

"How can you say that now of all times?"

No answer.

She sighed. "I see that they have finished their adventure of the day and are heading back into town, a lot dirtier than they no doubt started."

Indeed, as she said this, the three young fillies were heading off into the distance as the vision began to fade.

"You're wrong."

"It's been known to happen. Quite a lot recently it would seem."

"Trust me, it's not just recently," the voice said. There was clearly a smirk forming on the face it belonged to, of that she was sure. "Not wrong in what you say mind you, but in the way you missed out what was important.What you saw was indeed three very important and very silly ponies. What you also saw was the looks in their eyes. The faces which said 'nothing can separate us, we are friends to the end'. In those faces....you saw love."

She found that her throat felt a little chocked up. A strange sensation to have when one doesn't have a throat.

"I did."

She closed her imaginary eyes for a long period of time, just letting the faces of the three ponies sink into her memory where they would forever be stored. She missed having good friends who would do anything for her. It really had been such a long time ago. It must be nice.

"Oh, you also saw the reason for a very interesting birthday party for one of those three just last week. Apparently somepony wasn't too pleased by the state in which they showed up."

She smiled. She had made an appearance at that party and it had indeed been an interesting affair. It also had some rather nice cake on offer too.

"Hmm."

"What is it?"

"Nothing. It just seemed like you were actually happy there for a moment."

"I was. Is that so wrong?"

"No, I just thought that you were set on making yourself as miserable as possible."

To this, she remained silent for a time. "If I were to ask a question, would you answer it truthfully?"

"Now that depends on the question."

Of course it did...

"Have I wronged you in some way recently that I am unaware of?"

"Most likely. Though if you have, I too am unaware. Why?"

This was not quite the answer she had hoped for but knowing who she was talking to, was pretty much what she had expected.

"You seem to be showing me ponies. Ponies I have met."

"Congratulations, your eyes are in prefect shape."

Ignoring this she continued, "You seem to be showing me the good in each and the feelings they share. Is this not true?"

"Perhaps. Is that what you see?"

"I see things that I never had, nor cannot now!" She couldn't help a slight of anger escape into her voice.

"I think it's time we had a little rest. That's not an excuse to go anywhere mind you, not yet. Just stay here and relax."

"Yes, because I have so many choices...."

The voice had gone.

She was sure that her tormentor was probably enjoying this. At any rate, she had taken a little time to...meditate of sorts. Calm her mind at the very least. She was getting used to the chain of events now and sat patiently as she awaited her next vision. Surely it wouldn't be long before bordom struck and the voice returned with a vengeance.

Indeed, as she thought this, another vision began to form.

She found herself in a shop. More accurately, a boutique. This was home to another one of the Element bearers, and indeed that pony was there working her trade whilst having a conversation with somepony who wasn't part of the vision.

One thing that did surprise her however, was the fact that the floor of the boutique was an absolute disaster area. Clothes, hangers and assorted other things were scattered everywhere.

"What do you see?"

"If it wasn't so bright in here, I could nearly think this was your room."

"Oh, so she does still hold a sense of humour I see. Well?"

"I see the bearer of the Element of Generosity, Rarity and the boutique in which she lives and works. A curious pony indeed. At first glance, not your first choice to bear the element she represents. Nor a pony to ask for help when it is needed."

"But..?"

"But she too wears a mask. A different kind of mask than the others perhaps. She puts forward the image of a pony who is above all others and should be treated as such. She deserves all the good things in life for she is important. A diamond in the rough I suppose. The funny thing is, she is all of those things and she does deserve every ounce of good that comes her way. The problem is that she doesn't believe it herself, and as such projects that onto others. What I see, is a pony with a heart that shines as bright as the sun itself. I see a pony who works too hard in a constant struggle to be the pony that she already is."

"You always did see the best in ponies. You have become so dour as of late though."

"Can you blame me? I'm to leave everything I know and care for."

"You don't have a choice in the matter. You know you need this, it has been long overdue as it is. I wouldn't allow you to stay even if you didn't agree to this."

"I know, I know. It's for the best but that's not going to change how I feel. Anyway, you asked what I see and I told you. I'm sure you're dying to tell me what I've missed."

"Of course. Everything you said is true, but there is more. You see a pony who only wants the best. Not for herself mind you, but those around her. As you say, she has her 'mask' too. Her acting is second to none it would seem. Everything has to be perfect for her friends. No cut corners, no spot of dirt. This applies to herself as well. Those she cares about deserve the best, and as such, she tries to fit that role. Just as you say, in her heart, she is already the pony she tries so hard to be.Even now, unseen to us, she is discussing with three little fillies about how they would like their party, the following day, to look. Which decorations to use and which dresses they would like to wear. What you see is a pony who has put her work and her proper decorum aside to help some ponies she cares about. What you see here is a pony putting her love for another before everything else that she supposedly finds important."

"She truly does shine doesn't she?"

"She does indeed.But...it is hard to see one's own light, is it not?"

She let this last remark slide past her as her mind focused on the pony in front of her. To have somepony drop everything and stop caring about other things just to share a bit of love and attention, even if just for a little while. She would very much like that right now.

As before, the darkness returned.

"You aren't having dark thoughts again are you?"

"Of course not!"

"You know I'm here for you. This isn't just a dream, some random images concocted by your mind."

Obviously she knew this to be true, and that thought alone brought her dipping mood back up.

If she was surprised by the mess as Rarity's, there was no hint of such in this new vision. She had come to expect a somewhat less than clean work area when it came to this pony.

"What do you see?"

"Not something I've had too much experience with, it must be said. Though having this one enter our lives has indeed increased that experience somewhat."

"Never a truer word."

"I see the kitchen at Ponyville's local bakery. I see a ridiculous amount of food ingredients all over the place, and very few of them where I would expect they need to be in order to make the cakes and sweets this place specialises in. In the middle of all this, I see a pink on pink pony with more of said ingredients on her than the rest of the room combined. I see Pinkie Pie, the Element of Laughter. It really does boggle the mind how she can make such fantastic tasting treats in all of this."

There was an odd sort of silence, a faint sensation of amusement.

"Not that I would know."

"Of course not."

"I see how this pony is never in one place for more than a second and is constantly talking, just as she is now, though I cannot see who she is talking too. In her eyes though.... I can see what lies beneath."

"Another mask? You seem to like finding them and pulling them aside."

"It's hard not to notice these things when you get to be so old. I see that she puts on a happy smile as to be as friendly a pony as can be. I see that she has her fears as all do. I see that her greatest is being alone."

"True but there is nothing to say that wearing a mask is necessarily a bad thing. It is just another part of you after all. Wear a mask long enough and it can give you the confidence you need to become that part of you. But I digress.No, you're wrong. And I think you're doing this on purpose now."

"Perhaps a little. Tell me what I see. It sounds much more meaningful when spoken by you."

"Well, yes. Everything usually does. She definitely deserves the Element she is connected to.You see a pony who does indeed project the happy, smiling, carefree outer and you do indeed see the fear of being alone. But what you also see is that the mask she wears is not for herself. She keeps it on so that nopony else will be without a friend, Nopony else will feel the loneliness she fears. She may fear it but she doesn't need to. She may not have started out that way, but the happy, friendly pony you see before you is who she really is. When you look at her, what you are seeing.....is love. A love so powerful it needs to be shared. Or perhaps in your case, it's cake? I do believe this was the preparations for a certain fillies birthday party you seemed to have enjoyed."

"..."

Again these words were true. The pony she saw before her did indeed wish to spread love and friendship to everypony she met. She only wished that she could have let this pony share it with her.

"We seeing a pattern yet?"

"Yes, but I think I'm missing the point."

"Obviously."

Blackness.

These ponies she had been shown thus far. All of them had their problems in their own way and yet, each of them perfect. Not one would she trade as a guardian of Equestria.

"Heh."

"What's so funny?"

"Oh, just this next one. Simple in a way, yet I bet you miss it. I'm perhaps being a but unfair with this one though."

Again Celestia found herself above the ground similarly to her first visions, and again she found herself surrounded by a view dominated by one colour. The sky was beautiful. It appeared to be a bright cloudless day, or mostly so at any rate. There were a few wisps of white dotted around the vision, but they seemed to emphasise it's beauty. Below, she could just see a town. Ponyville.

Of course, what the surroundings lacked in colour, the pony her consciousness was apparently following, made up for.

"What do you see?"

Expecting this question before the scene had appeared, she had every intention of having an answer ready. An answer that would appease the voice. She failed. She knew very well what she was looking for, but right now with the way she felt, she couldn't help looking for other things.

"I...I see Ponyville far below, the town going about it's day to day business presumably. I see clear skies and a pony who is most likely supposed to be working. I see the Element of Loyalty, Rainbow Dash. I see her racing through the skies as if she doesn't have a care in the world. I see the strain in her features and the mask she too wears."

"We all wear masks."

"Indeed we do but I've had the misfortune of seeing how they can affect people, first hand."

"You do not wear yours as well as you think you do."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Typically, there was no answer. "You can be quite infuriating at times, have I ever told you that?"

"Why, yes. On many occasions in fact, yet somehow that doesn't upset me."

'Why do I even bother,' she thought to herself before returning her attention to the pony in front of her.

"I see the mask of confidence which covers her self-consciousness. Her fear that she isn't quite good enough. The fear that she will fall just short when she is needed the most. The fear of failure. A fear I know all too well."

"You never failed. Not when it mattered. And you're wrong again."

"Am I not failing right now?"

"That's not how we see it."

"We?"

"You do Indeed see Rainbow Dash, flying recklessly as she is prone to do. Yes, she is headstrong and quite good at shirking her duties. I'm in no place to fault her for that though."

Another silence with a hint of humour. How this was so, was beyond her.

"You see a town that is a better place than it could quite easily have been. You see a pony flying overhead who has played no small part in making it so. You see a pony, determination on her face, as she races to a farm in the distance to lend a hoof after an accident left a pony unable to work. You see a pony who will always be there when she is needed the most. You see a pony who has no need to fear the thing she does. At the very heart of it....you see love."

Celestia couldn't say anything. She did see it now. That look in the blue pony's face could only come from somepony who cared about another greatly. And in the distance, in the direction the pony was flying, she saw Sweet Apple Acres.

If only she had a friends like that. She regretted how she kept herself apart from it all.

Again, the vision faded to black.

This time the silence and blackness went on for a much longer period and she began to think to herself that this may in fact be the end of her little slide show. The end to it all perhaps. But just as this thought began to form, there was a ripple in the darkness before her.

"Now, this might be a bit unfair. It's not something I had planned on showing you, but I'm curious all the same. I apologise in advance."

At this she couldn't help but be intrigued, and also a little afraid. That apology had almost sounded sincere.

A single form appeared before her eyes, much like the image of herself at the beginning of all this. The image did indeed resemble that first in many ways, right down the wings, horn and ethereal mane. That's where the similarities stopped however.

In front of her stood the dark, tall form of the creature she feared the most.

"What do you see?"

"You! You ask this of me now?!"

"I do."

Calming herself and steadying her non-existent heartbeat, she spoke, although somewhat bitterly, "I see Nightmare Moon. I see the mare who took my sister away from me for over a thousand years. I see my greatest fear and also my greatest failure. I see the hatred in her eyes. I see the possibilities of what could have been if I had taken notice sooner."

"You do seem to be in the habit of missing things don't you? But here too, you are wrong. However this time I do not blame you."

"How can you say that?"

"Because Nightmare Moon is no more and shall never be again. You see a sister transformed out of hatred and anger. Anger and hate of this magnitude can only be warped from an equally powerful emotion. Not only that, but what is it that defeated her?

"The Elements of Harmony."

"Yes, and without the feelings of the bearers behind them, the Elements are useless. What you see is nothing more than a memory. When you think of Nightmare Moon, there is only one thing that should be in your mind."

"Let me guess, Love?"

"Of course. With that in heart, her likes will never be seen again. Of course this is a two way street.Fear not though."

"I'm confused. Why show me this though? It doesn't really follow your pattern."

"I know. I was just giving you time."

"Time for what?"

"For what you know is coming next."

The slight anger she had felt, faded. In it's place, sadness. "Oh..."

And with that, the laughable threat of Nightmare Moon vanished, and in it's place, another pony appeared. Again, it was a pony with wings and horn both but unlike the previous two, this pony's mane and tale did not blow in a non-existent breeze.

"What do you see?"

She could barely get the words out, "Twilight Sparkle."

"Twilight Sparkle," the voice said in agreement.

In the silence, there was an understanding in which the voice said nothing and waited patiently.

"I see a beautiful mare, asleep, resting against something unseen. Most likely her desk in the library. I see a pony who has obviously overworked herself and as such has had little rest. I see a pony who is far too clever for her own good and prides herself on it. I see a very silly pony who dared to care for somepony such as myself. I see the ever loyal Spike by her side, also asleep. He really does go out of his way for her."

"Interesting..." The voice was much softer now, comforting in its way. "Look closer."

"I see....I see tears.... I see the redness around her eyes." There was a moment of silence as her mind quickly pieced together what this meant. "No...."

"Yes. This one is not a vision of the past. Do you now see? Do you now know why I have shown you these?"

"I do," she said, raspy voice barely a whisper.

"In these visions, you have seen many ponies and the love they have to offer."

"Yes."

"So now, I have one final thing to show you."

Rivers of invisible tears rolled down Celestia's invisible face as the image of Twilight Sparkle began to expand. The purple pony remained in the centre as the rest of the surroundings began taking form. She was not slumped over her desk as was first assumed. No, she was half lying over a bed, each and every pony she had seen that night, save for Nightmare Moon, sitting beside or behind her, each with their eyes closed, tears of their own also visible.

"But why?" she barely managed.

"Isn't it obvious? What you see...is love. This time however, it's all for you. These ponies are who they are because of you. Your rule has made the world what it is today, and the world has made what these ponies are today. You might not have gotten to know some of them as much as you would have liked, but you have touched each and every one of them, and they all love you for it."

She didn't know what to say. She said something anyway. "Thank you."

A form appeared before her. The dark blue coat and beautiful flowing night sky of a mane of her sister, Luna. A moment later and she realised that she too had a form of her own.

"A parting gift for you as you rest." Luna's voice still sounded so distant, and yet it had never sounded more beautiful and caring.

"I will treasure it always." She truly would. With this, she thought she could face anything. Even this. "You'll make sure they stay safe, won't you?"

"Of course."

At these words, she felt the weight of her incredibly long life hit her all at once, yet at the same time, a great burden lift from her.

"And you'll be waiting for when I return?"

At this she got a nod from the image of her sister.

"Could you say goodbye to them for me? Tell them that I too, love them?

"They know. They have been here the whole time, though I believe they knew before this. You have never been, nor shall ever be, alone."

This was the biggest surprise of the night and fresh tears began to flow. "Thank you, truly." Celestia turned and looked to the side of her sister's form at the empty space that occupied it. "I am so proud to have known each and every one of you, even if I wish it could have been more. Please, as she looks after you, keep an eye out for Luna. You know what she's like."

Obviously there was no answer.

She looked back at her sister. An acknowledging nod and wry smile indicating that they had heard and agreed.

"So, I guess it's time? Just one thing before I rest though."

"Yes?"

"All of those visions. You told me what I saw, or at least what I should have seen. What is it that you saw?"

A smile formed on the smaller pony's lips, "I saw you, sister. I saw you."

"Huh?"

"Goodnight sister. I love you."