Nailbiters

by Tibbles

Rating: teen
Tags: Adventure, Dark, Alternate Universe, Human
Length: 8263

Discord brings millions of humans to Equestria. We learn to cast magic with our fingernails. Discord forgets to patch up the tunnel between the dimensions. We will pay dearly for it.

Discord has been feeling down since the reformation. He hasn't been getting the chaotic energy he needs solely by his prank business in Canterlot, especially since he's getting a lot of flak and losing sales for nearly annihilating Equestria. He decides that it's time for a change in tone.

He decided to bring a fair amount of the human population to his world by expanding the planet Hexa and dropping our sorry butts onto the stretch of randomized land he gave us. We only got a few cities, some museums, and our single nuclear fusion reactor as power. Discord hoped we'll struggle, but shortly after we arrived on New Earth we found a way to cheat him out of his own plan.

We adapted.

————–

By the way this is NOT a TCB fic, but honestly I don't really know what they are, so yeah.

More character and story tags will be added if needed.

Collab with Vocal Brony and BackgroundNoise.

The world of Hexa is based off of this map by hlissner. It may be old, but it was the most completed map there was, so I'm using it on his permission.

I'm also in need of much better cover art.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-09-10 00:44:04 UTC

Prologue: Quantum Divinity

Prologue: Quantum Divinity

The following is one of the only interviews conducted on the citizens of New Earth who had witnessed the beginning of the Countdown.  The interviewee has formally requested that their name and face be censored.

Hello everybody! Welcome to Sundays with Mic!  I'm, well as you all know, Glitzy Mic, and I'm your host tonight.  But of course you all knew that, why else would you be listening to me?  I mean it's not as if I have a ridiculously rich, deep voice that makes all the mares swoon.

(Laughter)

Okay well, we've got a bit more of a serious topic today.  You all know how three years ago, the creature known as Discord brought humanity to our quaint little planet.  Well, here I have one of the only humans to have gone through the entirety of the Countdown AND the Migration, up close and personal, [REDACTED]!  Let's give him a round of applause everyone!

(Thunderous applause)

Thanks Mic, it's really an honor to be here.

Oh I know.

(Laughter)

Ha ha, yeah.  So what exactly did you want me to be here for, anyway?  You didn't really give me much info to go by.

Oh really?  Oh I thought Lone Spark filled you in as he was forcefully carrying you here.

(Slight laughter)

Yeeaah.  No, h-he didn't.

Well, bottom line is, Hexa and New Earth both want to know how it was to be at the start of the Countdown as well as being one of the first to Migrate.

I g-guess s-s-so.  Ugh I cannot talk today.

(Laughter)

Yeah yeah, speech impediment, real comedy there.

(Hard laughter)

Keep it going, you could do stand up!

I wish.

But we should really get back on topic, shouldn't we?

Thank you.

Okay, can you describe what you experienced at the beginning of the Countdown?

Gladly, but this'll be kinda long, so don't interrupt me.

Absolutely.

It was January 20th, 2021, President Maark's inauguration day when the Countdown officially started.  I was only nineteen when he appeared over the U.S. Capital.

It was shocking for everyone--the people watching the inauguration, the people sitting at home, the media (well of course), President Maark and especially his secret service agents.  When the black tunnel started forming over the U.S. Capital everyone went still, even the President stopped his speech to get a look at what was going on.  I was standing very close to the front of the crowd so I remember the event vividly.

The day was not the most significant of days (at least in terms of the climate).  The sky was a dreary overcast and it was kind of that icky temperature in which it was too warm for a jacket but too cold for long sleeves.  There was absolutely no moisture in the air and I saw about six people with nosebleeds, but no one cared about the temperature, as we were all listening to President Maark deliver his speech.  There were thousands of us packed into the crowd, all waiting to watch the new to-be President become the President.  As soon as he begun his speech with what would have been iconic words, "We are some greedy bastards, we all know it," the unthinkable began.

First there was a shimmer in the air like heat distortion on a sweltering August day, except the air temperature was about 45 degrees Fahrenheit.  No one really gave it much thought until the ripples in the air started to thicken, expand.  The distortion started becoming darker and darker, as if a storm cloud was forming directly over the U.S Capital.  I'm pretty sure most people thought that was what it was for a few minutes, a freak storm cloud, until it started rotating and turning into more of a triangular pattern.

The wind started picking up at this point, biting, bitter gusts that would've made everyone wish they brought with them some mittens, a scarf, and possibly more winter apparel if everyone wasn't so busy starting to panic.  Most of the people around me were screaming now, some of them rambling on about Armageddon and other religious doomsdays or some freak-show conspiracies.  Most of them were too busy starting to riot to notice that the hole in the sky was starting to gain depth, looking more like a tunnel than just a symbol in the sky.  At this point half of the city was running for their lives as the triangular tunnel just kept spinning faster and faster.

The mass self-evacuation gave way for the numerous news crews now rolling up in vans or helicopters, the president long gone.  All the while I'm still just standing there underneath the stormy tunnel as it now was producing a humming noise and growing considerably larger.  As I was standing there transfixed I hadn't even noticed the several varieties of police force vehicles, such as armored cars, black attack helicopters, and about a gazillion police cruisers.  They were all here.  Two officers with what i think was Kevlar came up to me and started escorting me away when we heard a great sound.

It was a cross between a roar, an electrical surge and someone vomiting . . .  No wait someone actually just vomited next to me, I wondered why?  My bad.

It was just the roar and an electrical surge that we heard, except it was incredibly loud, enough to rattle my vision (I now remember from a while ago, I don't remember where, that for a noise to vibrate your eyes needs to be 145 decibels), but not quite to rupture my eardrums. The few people still on the field at the time were now covering their ears in pain, myself included, even some of the soldiers were doubled over.  Now things were being blown around by the wind, I heard some of the cars starting to groan in protest and and signs and pickets being tossed up into the air and rocketing in all directions except towards the building.  I even had to dodge a posterboard with the words "Make YOUR Maark!" flying at tornadic speeds.  That's harder to do than you'd think, especially considering the brain-damaging sounds coming from the triangular hurricane.

That's when I saw it coming down the now mile-wide tunnel.  I couldn't see very well however, the wind was tearing at us at about 70 mph, there was debris shrouding our vision, and he wasn't very far down the length of the tunnel.  The noise ended and some people continued running, but most of us stopped.  We could see a figure floating down through the tunnel in the sky.  From what we could see it was still very far above us, perhaps about three-thousand feet.

We couldn't make out the figure well, but we could tell that it was very asymmetrical, as in it's arms and legs were different sizes.  It also seemed to have a very lithe frame.  It then seemed to exit the tunnel, as there was an aquamarine flash of some sort of grid on the underside of the swirling tunnel.  Then the figure raised his lopsided arms and waved them to either sides of it's head (or what we assumed was it's head) and back forcefully, propelling some sort of white beam towards the grid.

The tunnel abruptly closed in on itself like doors closing, and the winds slowly died down--debris skidding to a stop on the smooth pavement--along with the distortion in the overcast sky.  The figure just floated in the air at about where it exited the tunnel for about a minute, possibly taking in it's first good look at where he ended up.  There was only about two-hundred people still on the field at this point, excluding the police and the news crews.  It was probably sensible to run away right then, but no one else was running and I couldn't really bring myself to run either.  Some people got on their knees and started praying, but I along with most of the rest of the crowd, including the SWAT team and other forces just watched.

The figure started floating downward towards the podium where the President Maark was delivering his speech less than five minutes ago.  Everyone gasped in shock and took a step back.  My eyes followed the figure downward through the air until it landed on it's strangely small-for-it's-size legs quite elegantly.  The creature seemed to take a large breath of contentment, or possibly success, I couldn't tell.  Then the creature began his own speech with what now is considered one of the most recognizable phrases in history, toppling not only President Maark's "We are some greedy bastards," but also Martin Luther King Jr.'s "I have a dream,"  Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address, and even "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!"

"Hello, my little humans!"

Anyone running stopped in their tracks.  Anyone watching this on the news became a lot more interested, which is saying a lot especially since they were basically watching what looked to be an alien dropping out of a hole in the sky.  Everyone else just stood there in a kind of stupor.

"This is really an honor to be here,  truly it is.  I know how you creatures react to stuff like what you're experiencing right now, and I'm loving every second of it!  You people right in front of me don't even realize how much mayhem I'm causing right now in your country alone, do you?"

We didn't know what we were looking at, much less how much "mayhem" we were causing.  Judging by the voice, the creature was obviously male, and in my mind he seemed a bit . . . snarky.  His body was a mismatch of what looked like different animal parts grafted to an already patchwork body.  His face was the most awkward, looking like it couldn't even vocalize English speech.  He had yellowish eyes with red pupils, indicating that he was some sort of predator.  He had two varieties of horns growing on his head, one that looked like an antler and another that seemed to be a malformed ram's horn.  He had very white eyebrows with a similar beard to match growing off of his knobby chin.  He even had a single fang growing out of his mouth.

His body was an entirely different story however.  Like I thought earlier, his body was quite streamlined and thin, with brownish-gray fur growing down about a quarter of his body, stopping at what i believed was a neck.  He had tufts of straight hair that seemed like a giraffe jutting out from the back of his neck . . . actually I don't think I can call it a neck since his whole body is about the same width.  The brown fur makes way for fuzz like a bear, only mahogany in color, like a reddish grizzly.  He then seems to have two arms of different kinds, one seemed to be a variety of bird talon, the other more akin to a lion's paw.  I have no idea if those are used and even how that would be useful, but it doesn't stop there.

About halfway down his body he had two wings, one which appeared to be a bat and the other some variety of large blue bird.  And even farther down he sported two different legs, one that I can only describe as a dinosaur or dragon's foot, and then I think it was a horse's hind leg?  I don't know, but the mahogany fuzz gives out to what I believe is a snake's tail, with dull spines running down the length of it, and a long white strand of fur that seems to match his facial hair, but it could be a horse tail.

"Freeze!"  Suddenly I'm jolted out of my analyzing state and I see soldiers running up from behind me towards the Capital building.  The officers that were escorting me earlier now were pushing me to the edge of the field--behind dozens of police cars, four armored cars and about what I guessed was 500 units of police.  They were everywhere.

"Remain where you are!"  I hear shouted in front of me.  A man with a megaphone steps beyond the line of troops and onto the now trampled field.

"Who, me?"  The creature asks in a sarcastic tone.  "Oh, I'm sorry, did I interrupt some-"

"You have the right to remain silent!" I hear the man with the megaphone shout as I see long tactical ropes being flung out from some of the helicopters hovering over the Capital building and people (probably more of the SWAT team) starting to slide down the ropes down onto the terrace in which the creature was standing.  There must have been ten people up there, with guns.  The creature then raised his strange arms to the sky with a mock look of terror on his face.

"Oh, I'm so scared!  Please don't hurt me with your weaponry!  I'll do anyt-hhhgggkk hah HAH HAH hah!"  The creature then starts laughing with obvious mirth and lowers his body to the ground.  "Oh, oh heh.  I can't even keep a *hah* calm demeanor in front of you guys!  What with all your big bad weapons and your 'you have the right to remain silent' stuff, a hah HAH HAAH HAAAAH!"  The creature then goes into a fit of hysterics, pausing from his great bellows to take a look at us, then he just kept laughing harder.  I'm still standing behind the police line wondering what on Earth is going on. After a half minute he seems to compose himself, wiping a tear away with his paw, with a few giggles popping up every so often.

"Hah, oh I'm sorry about that.  It's just that I find your species IMMENSELY entertaining, especially thinking that you can solve everything by waving your little toys around--"  The creature raises his talon in a casual fashion, and suddenly the police officers beside me are fiddling with their guns.  I didn't understand what was happening at first, but suddenly the police officers are appearing to be tossing their weapons onto the field.  Then the creature made a fist with his claw.

The guns started floating.  They all rose up into the air, cocked themselves, and took aim at the officers they originated from.  I didn't know what was happening, I saw a bunch of officers raising their arms above their heads, the ones to my sides with looks of terror on their faces.

"Now I'm going to count to three.  If your "president" or whatever isn't back here by then, well . . .  Let's just say that this lawn is going to get very messy.  One."

I couldn't believe this thing was doing this!  Was he seriously going to shoot all of these people just to talk to Maark?  Who the hell was this guy?

"Two."  I started hearing crying from about four locations.  Heart-wrenching, pleading sobs.

"Don't make me say three!  Oh wait, I just said it.  Oops!"  He raised his claw and made a motion that seemed as if he was going to snap his fingers.

"I guess we'll just go with that!"  And he snapped his claws.  I couldn't watch, I shut my eyes.

There was a series of blasts.

And then silence.

Followed by the creature laughing maniacally.  I was about to run away but when I opened my eyes I did NOT expect what I saw.

There were piles of confetti on the ground where the guns were floating before.  I looked around me, most of the cops had looks of confusion that probably matched up with mine.  He didn't hurt anyone. . .  That thing must have rigged the guns somehow - My thoughts were interrupted when the creature stopped laughing and started talking.

"Wow, you guys really ARE gullible!  I know you guys took this seriously, but come on, I'm not THAT mean, I'm just a creature of chaos, not death!"  He stopped talking and paused himself.  "However you DID interrupt me earlier, so I guess you guys ARE worthy of this."  He raised his lion's paw and then forcefully plunged it downward.  I suddenly heard a sickening crash, glass shattering, metal crunching, the whole shebang.  I also felt an intense blast of force that disrupted my balance, but I righted myself.  I looked around and saw that all the police cruisers had been flattened.  Later I found out on the news that the creature apparently stamped the cars with a indention of his face with the words "Discord approved!" into the cars and leveled them.

(Laughter)

I'm sorry for interrupting, but that's actually kind of funny.  Can you imagine seeing that?

I can, but it's not as funny when you were standing next to them and they all were decimated right beside them so you could feel the force of the blow.  Now where was I?  Oh yeah, Discord had started talking again.

"Sorry that I had to do that, but you guys interrupted my monologue, so I had to take action.  I guess I've never really introduced myself though.  My name is Discord."  Fitting, I thought.  "I am what's known as a draconequus, a pony mixed with a dragon as well as a myriad of other creatures, as you can see by my arms here,"  he started flailing his arms in a creepy way, as if they had no bones;  It reminded me of an old Earth cartoon called "Adventure Time."  I know some of the humans remember it, especially since the fandom got HUGE after the third to last season ended.

(General human consensus, approval and head nodding)

Never mind, I kinda went off on a tangent there.  "I am an incarnation of disharmony, or chaos if you want to get technical."

Draconequus?  Monologue?  Incarnation of disharmony?  Just what kind of alien monster were we dealing with?  I watched as one of the members of the SWAT team on the balcony--he was covered in confetti--start talking, but I couldn't hear him at all.  Thankfully Discord fixed this for me.

"What was that sonny?  You'll have to speak up," he then proceeded to levitate the officer towards the podium and put him down behind it.  "The world wants to know what you'd like to say!"  The unit looked frightened, but the draconequus motioned for him to go on with his lion's paw.  When the unit started speaking into the many microphones his voice was nervous and broken.

"H-how d-d-did you do tha-at?"  I have to give him credit, I would've been too scared to even speak, especially considering Discord was standing in at about nine feet tall not counting his horns.

"Do what?  You mean the little trick I pulled with your useless firearms?  Oh that was easy!  I simply turned them into confetti!  What's so odd about that?"  He seemed to be wearing a very condescending face when he said this . . . "Oh that's right!  You guys can't do ANYTHING the ponies can do, can you?"  The unit looked like he was going to soil himself, but what was that the creature said?  Ponies?

"Well, CAN YOU?"  He got up into the unit's face and stared at him.  Now I don't know how the unit would be feeling right now, but considering Discord's awkward face, I'd think that he was NOT having a good day.

"I-I don't kn-now,"  the guard shakily replied.

"Well you can't!  Because you're only lowly humans!"  He said this with a patronizing laugh, but he seemed to deflate a bit after it.  "Well, you're not really that lowly.  Especially with how you beat the odds against yourselves countless times, built all this, and . . ."  He started mumbling to himself and I couldn't make out what he said.  Strange.

"Even still, you don't understand who I am or what I can do.  But I'm going to change that in about three of your Earth days."  I didn't like the sound of that.  "However, being a creature of disharmony does not necessarily mean death and destruction.  You may not know it, but where I come from I was quote-unquote reformed so anything I do to you will have some sort of effect to myself."

Wait, what's he talking about reformed?  What the hell is he going to do to us?

"But I'm not ALL bad.  All I ask is that you start gathering your supplies."  The SWAT unit spoke up again.

"Um, w-why should we?  What are you going to do to us?  Should we be worried?"

"Well, if I told you, that would take all the fun out of this," he squatted down and put his bird claw around the guy's neck, like someone would do for a distressed child.  "Wouldn't it?"

I didn't know what to make of Discord's words.  At first it seemed as if he was going to make our lives miserable, somehow, but now he seemed . . . unreadable.  I honestly couldn't tell if his intentions were malevolent or not, and I'm pretty sure most of whoever was still watching the news couldn't either.  His warning about "gathering supplies" didn't sit well with myself.  Discord then raised back up to his towering stature and looked out at the large police force at the edge of the lawn.  He started to talk with a very loud voice into the microphones.

"You hear that, humans?  You'd best start gathering your supplies!  If I were your leaders, I'd start transporting your history to some bunkers, and your humans to your big cities!  Remember, you don't know what I can do, so you'd best heed my words on this."  He 'snapped' his claws together again, and some sort of large white square appeared in the air, I saw some units fumble around for their guns, and then they remembered that their guns were in piles of multicolored glitter and streamers dotted around the lawn.

The white square was enormous, probably twice the length of the capital building and the same length high.  Then text started appearing, large, black, blocky letters and numbers.

RETURN: 2.12.00.00

MIGRATION: 3.00.00.00

"This is your countdown timer.  I will return in two and a half days to see how you're doing.  In three days, well, I'll let you try and figure out what I'll be doing then!  Now, here's what you'll probably need to survive after what I'm calling the Migration."  He waved his lion paw outward, and the white square rippled, suddenly new text had appeared on the transparent surface.

LOTS OF FOOD

WATER

ANYTHING ELSE YOU NEED TO SURVIVE, FOOD AND WATER IS ALL I KNOW

MINING EQUIPMENT

Mining equipment?  Why would we need that?  Was he going to put us all underground?

"Now that that's all fine and dandy, I really must be going,"  Discord once again snapped his "fingers".  Up above we started hearing a familiar sound.  Some of the SWAT units started looking skyward and I did the same.  The same triangular, stormy gateway was starting to reform and spin.  The wind started picking up again, so some of the gun-confetti started blowing away.  Discord started talking again, but it was gradually getting harder to hear him over the hum of the portal and the roar of the wind.

"You'd best start bringing in your supplies to your big cities!  Because, spoiler alert, I'm taking them with you!  Better hurry my little humans, clock's ticking!"  It's a good thing he didn't say anything after that, because the portal was finally humming and groaning loud enough to be the only thing you could hear.  When my vision started to quiver, I ducked behind one of the dilapidated police cruisers, trying to get out of the wind.  The wind raged with howling noises for about two minutes and then died down.  I got up to look around, and saw the "Countdown Clock."

RETURN:  2.11.57.49

MIGRATION:  2.23.57.49

LOTS OF FOOD

WATER

ANYTHING ELSE YOU NEED TO SURVIVE, FOOD AND WATER IS ACTUALLY ALL I KNOW

MINING EQUIPMENT

Well the clock really WAS ticking, and we now knew how much time we had left.

I turned around and gazed at the rest of the people near me.  Many of them were running, some were trying to talk to the police, others were on their mobile phones with looks on their faces that ranged from terror to . . .  Giddiness I guess?  I don't know why they'd be feeling like that, but I knew how I felt.

I was scared.  I didn't know what that creature had in store for us, but he seemed sure of himself enough for us to believe that he can do whatever he said he's going to do.

Wow, that sounds terrible.

It was.

What did you do afterwards?

When I got to my dorm on the American University campus I immediately called up my mother (she was in the hospital at the time) and told her I was alright.  She asked me to visit her with a seemingly sad voice at the time-

Are you okay there, [REDACTED]?

I-I just realized that I haven't seen my mother since the Migration.

Oh.  That's, that's not good.

N-no, no i-it's *sniff* not.  I'm not even s-sure if she Migrated.

I'm sure she did, buddy.

*Sniffle*  Yeah, she must have, somewhere.

Do you mind continuing?

No, I-I'm fine.

I rushed to find my car o-on the now empty streets of D.C. and tried to buy a plane ticket to San Francisco, where my m-mother li-lived.  But e-everyone had apparently *sniff* already evacuated themselves.  I saw a bunch of people in the airport, a few stewardesses and one or two pilots, but there weren't enough people to actively schedule a flight back to Atlanta, much less San Francisco.

Is San Francisco far away from New York?

Oh yeah, it was on the other side of the continent, like two thousand miles away.

I dejectedly drove back to campus.  When I arrived my roommate was there at the door talking to someone on his phone too.  He had been watching the news and when Discord disappeared into what scientists were classifying as a "Quantum Tunnel" he drove over to try and find me.

He sounds like a good person.

He was.  I can't find him anymore though.  I haven't been able to find him ever since the Migration, but for all I know he wasn't even Migrated with the rest of us.

That's a shame.  So can you describe what the next three days were like?

Oh man, here we go.  At first people were RIDICULOUSLY skeptical.  The Internet was affected the worst.  Thousands of posts on FireWall, Reddit, and Twitter were all crackpot conspiracies about just what the hell was going on.  Some believed that it was a successful test of the new hologram technology Sanctum made, but then there were people disbelieving that, and over and over and over.  It really was a flame war all over for the first day.  Then 4chan got in on the act, this is when it REALLY started getting out of hand.  Most of the users on there believed Discord entirely, and started building a new religion.

What?

Most people thought 4chan was just trolling again and were doing it for kicks, but then the "Discordians" started preaching about it in public places.  The most successful preaching went viral on YouTube in less than six hours after 4chan posted the first thread asking for the idea of a religion based on him.

By this time the Countdown for RETURN was basically a doomsday that the Discordians were waiting for.  It was insane.  With everyone panicking and the government too busy sorting out what to do next the Discordians, or "discos" as the internet was now referring to them as, started finding abandoned buildings and claiming them "in the name of Mayhem".  Even still, there were still a fair amount of conspirators and skeptics on the Internet, with discos and scared users making up the rest of the population.  All of this occurred in a single day.

Wow, that's pretty intense, for lack of a better word.

You believe it.  One of the most famous acts as of that time  was when someone posted a picture from the video game The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask showing the words "Dawn of the Second Day - 48 Hours Remain" on Reddit.

(Laughter from some humans)

Yeah yeah, it was clever.  Anyways, this spurred everyone to start heeding Discord's words hoarding their supplies.  Highways were backed up for hours because of people trying to enter the bigger cities like D.C. or New York.

It was bad, I remember trying to drive to New York myself and I had to leave my car to walk into Manhattan.  There werethousands of people there.  I saw a few Discos in Central Park preaching then name of Disharmony with a megaphone, now they were not just talking about a joke from 4chan, they were doing things up there, disturbing things.  One girl took off her shirt and pants and walked up there with a knife and the "Maniac" or whatever they called the preacher took it from her and started carving runes or something into her back while speaking in tongues or something until the SWAT team arrived and started to break it up.

Okay, I almost can't believe this, so you're saying that they were willing to sacrifice themselves or something?

Oh absolutely.  I mean, people couldn't understand what was wrong with them, but at least the Discordia "religion" didn't really try anything else for a while.  Everyone else taking refuge in the city

How do you think the Discordia thing really spread so fast?

Honestly, I have no idea.  But a few hours after that the last day was upon us.  The Discos started upping their acts, even going as far as rioting to preach.  One guy even threw a bottle bomb at the riot squad.

Wow.

I know, but I'm not done quite yet.  Some people had access to the news on their smartphones, so people were crowding around them to see what was happening with the government.  We didn't even realize that the RETURN Countdown on the Countdown clock was less than two minutes away from ending.  However the Discordians of course did.  They were all bowing and waiting for whatever they were waiting for.  When the countdown for the RETURN ended the discos all started chanting for in some weird language probably made up on 4chan.  Again, I have no idea how this spread in a matter of less than three days.

Maybe Discord left some sort of, I don't know, parting curse or something before he left.

Actually, that sounds pretty plausible.  But anyway, I alongside like, twelve others were crowding around this one girl with her outdated iPhone 7 watching the news.  The anchors were acting as you'd think they would, with a smile and a charismatic voice.  They were joking around until suddenly the screen flickered to static for a moment.   The girl shook the device and smacked it a few times and it returned to normal, with only the sounds ending up slightly tinny and distorted, like a radio.  She said that it'd never done this, so she asked someone to go and see if anyone else was having trouble.  One of the others volunteered and I saw him jump over a few cars to ask one of the other groups if they were having trouble too.

He got back in less than a minute with the other group and said they actually completely lost the station and only had static.  So our small little crowd doubled in size.  While this was going on, the RETURN countdown reached its final ten seconds, our phone started acting up again, but we didn't realize what was actually happening.  Once the Countdown on the Countdown clock reached zero, all the phones turned off.

The girl was frantically telling us how she charged it a few hours ago and didn't even touch the off button.  We believed her, but when we looked at the Discos, they were all on their knees with their arms up to the sky.  One of the women in the group suggested that this was how Discord was returning.

Was it?

Oh yeah.  After about three minutes the iPhone suddenly turned back on, and what do you know!  Discord was on the screen, dancing for some reason.  He acknowledged the audience only after a minute of some sort of weird break-dance on the screen.  He finally started talking in that sarcastic voice of his.

"Why, hello my little humans!   I have returned, and you don't know what that means!"  We really didn't.  "I'm just here to check up on how you guys are doing, and it seems that a fair amount of you are heeding my advice, which is good for both of us!  Right now it seems that-"  He looked at his wrist for a second.  "Twenty-three million, ninety-two thousand and five-hundred twenty-six  humans have moved into the cities that I have decided will be coming with me."  Wait, he's only choosing a few?

"Oh, and while I was away I found out that this planet is bigger than I first thought, so, instead of taking most of you, I will be taking only a few million people from America!  Won't that be fun?"  It was shocking, to say the least.

Huh, your planet really must have been big.

Not really.  The United States of America isn't very much larger in terms of area than Equestria if you count Alaska and Hawaii.  The continental United States is actually smaller than Equestria.  Although, the USA isn't very large compared to a lot of countries, and boy did we have a LOT.  The land Discord added was about the size of the North American continent.

Then . . .  It is big.

Actually no, Hexa is actually much larger than Earth, it's just that Hexa has less land by comparison.  You guys have some BIG ASS OCEANS.

(Hey, I resent that!)

Sorry!  I'm still not used to NOT using Earth terms!

That makes sense.  When Discord expanded Hexa, he put a lot more water into the oceans than you think.  So how many humans were on Earth at the time of Migration?

Well in America it was around 350 million, but for the entire Earth I'm pretty sure it was somewhere between seven and eight billion.

(Large gasp)

Oh, wow, that's a lot of bodies.

Yeah, if you can believe it.  Anyway, this, of course, was a shocking revelation.  We expected Discord to be taking people from all over the world, but now that we were the only ones, people started panicking again.  People started to run towards their cars (myself included) to reach the nearest airport, but Discord had that covered.  We felt the ground shake violently for a few moments, and then suddenly Discord had materialized in the middle of the air, about twelve feet away from where I was standing.  People stopped running long enough for Discord to facepalm himself.

"Oh shut up everyone.  I like chaos a lot, but you're giving the wrong variety of chaos already.  You should just be quaking in your boots, not screaming in terror, I can only take so much of that.  Panic is like ice cream, it's delicious, but too much at one time will give me a head ache.  But anyway, I know that you are now all running away to try and fly away to a different country, so that shaking you all just felt?  That was me destroying every airport within a fifty mile radius of this city.  Anyone else in the cities that I am planning on Migrating will have felt those same tremors."

He trapped you?

Of course.  We couldn't get away farther than fifty miles in twelve hours with all the roads gridlocked, we were too close for people with motorcycles to get out!

What's a motorcycle?

It's basically a bulky, powerful, motorized bicycle.

Oh.

Back to the story.  One of the Discos walked up to Discord and started talking.

"Oh great Master of Mania, which of our lowly cities do you plan on Migrating?"

Really?  He ACTUALLY said that?

Why would I lie?  Anyway, Discord seemed surprised for a second, but he shrugged it off.

"Well, I guess I can tell you now, since you have only eleven hours left until Migration . . .  Eh why not?  Of course, as you've probably guessed, I'm taking New York, I'm taking . . .  Wait.  I know what you're doing!  Aha ha!  You're a clever one!"  He reached down and patted the Discordian's head.  When I tell you the cities there'll just be rescue attempts!"

Honestly, I didn't even think about that, but once he said it, I realized he was right, there WOULD be rescue attempts, I was just surprised that there weren't any already.

"Well, now that you know that I'm taking New York, I'm going to put a stop to your attempts of salvation."  He snapped his claws again, and suddenly there was a flash of purplish light.  It was like a line of some sort rising over the city from the outskirts.  It started getting higher and higher until it turns out it was a circle.  When the circle above us started getting smaller and smaller, some people around me started muttering the word "dome".  I didn't understand for a moment, but then it clicked.

Discord had sealed us all in a force-field dome to prevent rescues from being attempted.

Really?  That seems a lot like the Changeling attack on Canterlot six years ago.

That's a pretty good representation.  We couldn't get out to tell anyone, and no one could get in to help us even if we could've contacted someone.  It was pretty scary.  We didn't even get cell phone reception or Internet capability.

"Well, now that I've trapped you here, I guess I can read off my list."  He then conjured up a long wad of paper, like you'd see in a cartoon, and began to read off the city names . . .  In a bad British accent.

What's a British accent?  Is it someone from, I don't know, Brittania or something?

(Human laughter)

Heh, not quite, it's from an a country with, like, four different correct names.  Britain, England, The United Kingdom to name a few-

Hold up, I thought English came from America, but now you say that there's an England?  I'm not following.

(Sigh)  Look, I'll explain later, maybe I'll even imitate the accent, but for now I have to continue the story.  Could you please stop interrupting me?

Of course, I'm sorry.

Thank you.

"NEW YORK CITY.  CHICAGO.  LOS ANGELES.  AUSTIN.  INDIANAPOLIS.  Huh, I thought I had put more on there, oh well.  British Discord is the lesser Discord, at least in America."  Then he crumpled up his surprisingly short list and tossed it in the air.  For some reason a pixelated trash can like on an old computer appeared in the air, caught the paper, and disappeared in a cloud of red smoke.

"Well then," he had said, reverting back to his original snarky tone, "Now that you're all here, I might as well help you get situated."  He yet again snapped his claws together and another white "Countdown Clock" appeared in the sky.  This one, instead of a RETURN clock, now only had the MIGRATION Countdown on it, but with some added info.

MIGRATION:  0.11.57.32

HUMANS IN MIGRATING CITIES:  23,092,534

FOOD STOCKPILED [x]

WATER CONTAINED [x]

ANYTHING ELSE [I ASSUME SO]

MINING EQUIPMENT READY [x]

"Well, it looks like six more humans got into the cities before the shields went down! Good!"  Suddenly the number flashed red and dropped one.  "Oh, well then, looks like someone died off."  He waved his lion paw at the screen, "No matter, as long as there's enough of you for this."  Even some of the Discos looked troubled when he said this.  I could even hear someone somewhere starting to cry.  "Ahh, now THERE'S the chaos I remember!  All that turmoil stirring inside your heads, mm-mm-MMM!  Can't get enough!"

Hang on a sec.

Yes?

That doesn't really sound like Discord.

Well, that's exactly what he said, I was like, twelve feet away from him.

I don't know, the Discord we knew was more . . .  Well, I don't know, really.  The way you're describing him just seems off to me.

Well, I don't know he matches up with what I know, and besides, YOU'RE the one who asked me to be here and tell you this in the first place.

Okay, okay, I'll stop talking.

Again, thank you.  Discord ended up just leaving with a little merry wave and poofing into a rainbow cloud.  I'm not sure why he did that, but he did.  He didn't even say anything else

So for the next twelve hours, nothing really happened of consequence.  The only real significant thing that was occurring was how the Countdown Clock kept flashing red and lowering by one on it's HUMAN count, I assume because of a lot of suicides.  In fact, I'm pretty surprised there weren't a lot more, given that the people inside the domes were trapped until what some would believe as utter demise. . .

Now that I think about it, what would've happened if he really did just kill us off?  I mean, how would've Earth reacted?  Seriously, Discord could have just caused like a knife storm or something to appear inside the domes and slaughter us all. . .  I should probably stop talking about that, I'm gonna get depressed.

So will my ratings.

(Laughter)

*snicker*  Hilarious.  So where was I before I got off on that tangent?

You were saying something about nothing of consequence, I think.

Right.  I was surprised not very many people were panicking.  I mean, sure, there were those who were scared because of Discord's warning about us panicking and the Discordians, but still, there were millions of us stuck in that city.  Anyway-

You say anyways a lot.

. . .  I do don't I?  But what did I tell you about interrupting, Glitzy?

(fake zipping motion is portrayed)

Thank you, again.  ANYWAYS-

(Laughter)

After the numbers started going down, we lost about a thousand people in total before Discord Migrated us.  It was weird, but the next twelve hours didn't feel like a doomsday or anything, if anything it was kinda solemn.  At least I did, everyone else was kinda shrunken back.  I don't really know how else to explain it.  They just... sat there.  I was the only one walking around, it was pretty trippy too.  I was walking around at this point because I couldn't bear to sit on a car hood anymore, my legs were sore.  Oh, hey, did I ever say that it was night by this time?  I don't think I did.

So as I said, it was night time, but I could still see though the darkness with the light of the moon and the glowing of the Countdown Clock.  Sometimes the cars' bumpers distorted the the light and faces and turned them into wretched but happy souls.  Some were smiling, and some were crying.  Some people were doing both, and it was all the worse in the rusted chrome of an old 2008 Mazda.  But I kept walking, my legs needed to move.  I walked long and far, and eventually I reached the Empire State Building, an old extremely historic building that used to hold the record for tallest in the world.  It was quite a sight, bathed in the glow of only the moon and the bright light of the Countdown reflecting all the way from Central Park.

The doors looked frozen open, as if the electricity shut off exactly when they opened, which is probably what happened.  The elevator of course wouldn't work, so I walked through the lobby, trying not to trip over any furniture or whatever they had there.  Some people were sitting there, asleep.  One looked homeless, but I just kept trudging on.  At least one of the emergency lights were still on, so I could see my destination.  The stairwell.

If any of you don't realize, the Empire State is like, I don't know, a hundred or so stories up.

(Slight gasp)

Oh yeah, but I wasn't really here for the exercise any more.  I had always wanted to visit New York, and i figured now was the time for a tour, at least a small one.  So I started up the stairs.  The first few steps were easy, since the emergency light was showing through the window, so I had a little illumination.  But the next thousand or so..  You guys ever climb a skyscraper in pitch blackness?  It's an experience that you can't really get on a normal occasion.  I had to hold the railing up the whole thing.  I tripped I think four times too.  But hey, I? was here for a reason, and I wasn't going to be impeded by technology invented by people millennia ago.

So I kept walking.

And walking.

It was just myself, my legs, and the rail.  It was unworldy, I guess, if that's even a word.

Up and up I climbed.  Until I finally started seeing another light.

I finally reached the top!  I got a little too excited again and tripped on another step, but i didn't care, I made it up!  I fumbled for the handle, and when I found it I thrust the door open and walked onto the terrace.  The first thing I noticed was that it was no longer night time, and it hurt my eyes to even LOOK at the sky after getting used to nothing.  Actually, I couldn't see for like, three minutes.  But when I could see again, oh boy.  The skyline was amazing.  It was an amazing sunrise, the last one I'd see before I would see another one.

Thankfully I could still see the Countdown Clock, but from here the text were basically blurry scribbles, so I walked over to one of those periscope thingies you use to see really cool things from historic places and I took a look.

MIGRATION: 0.00.00.03

Oh.  Well.

Really?  Wow, that's some really lucky timing.

You bet your flank it was.  I didn't even have time to think before that clock hit zero.  And once it did, the Migration began.  First the rumbling started, not like an earthquake, but like a humming, not unlike what I heard when Discord first appeared over the Capitol building.  I looked up and sure enough, another stormy gate had formed, except this one seemed to be shaped like a hexagon, but it was hard to tell since it was already spinning so fast, but I swore that's what it was.  But besides that, it was also different in the fact that it wasn't causing wind like three days before.  I wondered why for a few seconds until I realized that we were still in a dome of energy.  That's when the "next phase" began.

There was a blinding aquamarine flash, and the tremors started, except this time it DID feel like an earthquake.  I stumbled and fell after the first wave of whatever was happening struck the Empire State Building.  These tremors were HUGE.  I tried stumbling to my feet, but kept falling since the tower was swaying back and forth in the quake.  Eventually after about two minutes the tremors died down to slight vibrations, and I got up.  I looked around and back toward the Countdown Clock.  I coundn't see what it said, but it was flashing like a strobe light.  I then looked further to see something odd.

The land at the edge of the dome was gone.  It was all gone.  I looked up again and saw the whirling portal becoming enormous, starting to block out the sky.  I realized that the land wasn't gone, it was just below us.  Discord was flying the Island of Manhattan towards a giant portal the size of Rhode Island.

What's Rhode Island?

It's an entire USA state, but I'm kinda exaggerating, at least I think.  I knew Discord's Migration would be taking us somewhere, but I just didn't know where.

No one did.  We were being forced to take a leap of faith into a gap we didn't even could exist.  I just kept looking into the depths of the portal, hoping that wherever we ended up was somewhere habitable, and Discord wasn't really insane.  There was finally a flash of cyan, and then everything started going nuts.  The buildings, the grounds, the walls of the portal, everything started blurring and warping.  My senses started going nuts too, I could see how the vibrations smelled.

(Laughter)

That sounds pretty far fetched but this IS Discord we're talking about.

You have no idea what it's like though.