Dr. Bob Saves Equestriaby SupahsnailChaptersThat One PortalOff The Table (again)!I Accidentally Another DimensionIntroThat One PortalDr. Bob lowered his chainsaw and wiped a bit of blood off of his featureless face. The former patient was now in three different sections on the ground; another unsuccessful operation. "Well, that guy whined a lot, huh, Pick?" Dr. Bob commented. "...Pick?" Pick was sitting down next to the fragmented body trying to pull two sections back together. "Pick!" Dr. Bob called. His assistant replied by glancing back at him. "Pick, get away from there. It's too late for him. You might get sick or something." Another blue, featureless klay man waddled behind the doctor and tapped him on the shoulder. "Um... Dr. B-" "Oh, Jesus!" Dr. Bob exclaimed as he jumped and turned to face the klay man. "Dr. Bob, I need to..." "You scared me!" Dr. Bob interrupted again. "Okay, sorry, but..." "I was scarred." The doctor interrupted a third time. "What do you want!?" "Well, I just had to tell you that..." "Spit it out!" "I, um..." The klay man kept attempting to talk, but each time he started to speak, he was interrupted again. "What do you want? Come on... Spit it out... I don't have all day... Come on." "PORTAL!" The klay man finally screamed. ________________________________________________________________________________ "Do you really think it's gonna work?" Spike asked. He was standing as tall as he could, using his claws to pull the top of his body above the table Twilight was working on. The wooden table was almost completely covered with papers, notes, and books, with only a few places where the brown oak wood could be seen. It was illuminated by a purple glow. In the center of the table, a purple, disk shaped light hovered up right. It was only about a foot in diameter. The purple light wasn't magical in nature, at least not completely. It was framed in a hollow, metal circle that was plugged into a metal cube through two power cords. "It looks awfully small, Twilight." Spike warned. "I don't even think I can fit through it!" "Well, you aren't supposed to." Twilight replied. "This is just a test run. Any unicorn can learn a teleportation spell, but creating a temporary warp could have hundreds of uses! Maybe they'll let me lead a lecture!" "How long should the power source last?" Spike asked curiously. "Only about two hours. But I can easily recharge it with my magic." Spike leaned over the table and gazed into the purple light. "What's on the other side of the portal?" He asked. Twilight lifted an orange ball. "That's what we're gonna find out!" "What does that ball do?" Spike asked. "It's sort of like that crystal ball queen Chrysalis used to monitor us when she fillynapped Applebloom and her friends. It should give us a perfect view of what's on the other side." ________________________________________________________________________________ Another purple warp had appeared in the middle of klay world. It was almost big enough to divide the table in half. A conglomeration of over twenty klay men stood on one side of the portal. Among them was Dr. Bob, Pick, and Sheriff Marv. Sheriff Marv always wears a yellow hard hat and has a burly brown mustache centered on his face. The crowd was murmuring and flailing their arms about. Most of them didn't seem too concerned. Marv projected with his nasally voice, "Okay everybody, calm down!" He said. His request was ignored. He pulled a hand gun from behind his back and fired into the air, then the others paid attention to him. "Okay, much better." He began, putting away his gun. "Now, as you have all noticed, there is a big purple thing that appeared on the table this morning." "I think it looks more like blueish red!" One Klay man shouted. "Well, no one cares about your opinion!" Marv snapped. "Anyway, we don't know what the hell it is. We don't know if it's dangerous or if it does something cool..." "I like cool things!" "NO ONE ASKED YOU!" Marv snapped again. "So, what we're planning to do is assemble a team of highly trained, super smart badasses; and they're gonna investigate this thing using the magic of science! And... Dr. Bob here is going to lead them." Marv gestured to Dr. Bob, who was standing behind him at the time. "WHAHOO!" Pick screamed while vibrating his head. "Hey, hey, hold on a second!" Dr. Bob exclaimed. He stepped forward a few inches. "I didn't volunteer for this!" "We love you, Dr. Bob!" someone screamed. Dr. Bob cupped his invisible mouth and yelled in the direction of the voice. "Shut up! You have no friends and your parents hate you!" He turned back to Marv. "Damn it, Marv, I'm a doctor not a scientist! What do you expect me to do?" Marv was about to reply, but before he could say anything, an orange ball that was larger than a klay man shot out from the portal and landed in the crowd of klay men. One klay person was crushed and the rest of the crown started to panic. "OH MY GOT!" "Has anyone seen my hotdog?" "WHAT IS THAT?" "Is it aliens again?" "I found the hotdog." "SOMEBODY CALL 991!" As the crowd began to disperse away from the mysterious object, Marv and Dr. Bob went in closer. "Should we touch it?" Marv asked. Off The Table (again)!"Oh no!" Twilight said in shock. She and Spike were looking through an identical crystal ball. Inside it was a clear image of Marv, Dr. Bob, and all the klay people that surrounded the original ball on the other side of the portal. "I think it hurt one of them! How was I supposed to know there would be such small creatures on the other side?" Spike was fixated on the blue figures he saw on the inside of the ball. "What are they, Twilight?" He asked, "I've never seen anything like that in Equestria." "That's just it, Spike!" Twilight exclaimed, "I don't think this portal leads to Equestria!" Spike scratched the top of his head, puzzled. "Um... Are they from the moon?" "I don't think so." "... Sattle Arabia?" "Even less likely!" Twilight said, "I doubt they're even from this solar system! They may even be from another galaxy!" "Don't you think that's just a little dangerous, Twilight?!" Spike jumped. "I admit this is a little risky," Twilight said as she wrote down some quick notes on the Klay people. "but it's equally fascinating!" "But what if this is a mistake?" Spike said worried, "What if these things are dangerous? What if they're some kind of super intelligent beings with a thirst to conquer?" _______________________________________________________________________________ A few hours after the crystal ball came through the portal, Marv had finally gotten the crowd to disperse completely. Dr. Bob had agreed to do the job he was assigned with the promise of one thousand moneys, and had assembled a team to work with him. Pick, his faithful assistant; Henry, Peter, and Franky the lanky, the average klay men with no important backstories; and Chip, a klay man with a large dent in the top of his head, were all chosen to work for him in exchange for twenty moneys and one very big hug. They were all gathered between the portal and the orange ball. Dr. Bob was standing in front of them with a tiny, paper poster mounted on a stand made of toothpicks. The paper board had nothing but a bunch of illegible scribbles written on it. "Okay everybody," The doctor began, "Thank you all for coming... except for you, Chip." "Why did you even ask me to come if you don't want me here?" Chip asked. "The only reason I wanted you to come is because I thought it would be funny if you hurt yourself." Dr. Bob said harshly. "And the only reason I agreed was because I wanted to be with you... When you fail." Chip snapped back. Dr. Bob tried to think of a quick response. "Oh yeah well... You're a three year old!" "Ooh, good comeback," Chip said smugly. "Shut up with that attitude!" Dr. Bob swung his stumpy arms wildly and knocked down the paper board and toothpick stand. He looked at the mess he had made and sighed. "You see what you made me do?" "Was there even anything important written on that?" Chip asked. As the attention was diverted from the mess, Pick crawled over to the wreckage, grabbed the paper, and began chewing on it. "Of course there was important stuff on it!" Dr. Bob said defensively. "Those were... top secret, important plans... and, like, intel and stuff from our satellites!" "We don't have any satellites." Chip stated. "Your mom has satellites!" Franky the lanky interrupted. "Hah! Good one, Franky!" Said Peter. "ALL RIGHT, LISTEN UP!" Dr. Bob commanded, immediately silencing all the other klay men. "We're running out of time. Anyway, we already know that objects can travel through this... purple disk thing; and that means that things from here can also get to... whatever is on the other side of it." "Wow, that was actually a good observation, Dr. Bob." Chip said surprised. "Yeah, that's because I'm a friggin' genius." Dr. Bob bragged, "So all we need is an army of specially trained hamsters armed with plastic explosives." "And I will now take back my last compliment." Said Chip. A seventh klay man waddled next to Dr. Bob. He looked regular aside from the fact that he had no arms. "Hey guys!" He said excitedly, "Do you guys need help!?" "You don't have any arms..." Said Chip. "That doesn't matter!" The armless klay man insisted, "I can still lend a helping hand!" Dr. Bob pointed to the other side of the table. "Hey, you see that guy over there carrying that really heavy thing and walking near the edge of the table? Yeah, why don't you help him out with that." The armless klay man walked off in the direction that the doctor had pointed saying, "Hey! Let me help you out with that!" "HEY! NO, NOT YOU AGAIN! WHOA, WHOA! WHO-" **CRASH!** Dr. Bob turned back to his team and continued, "Okay, so about those hamsters…" "Would you forget about the hamsters!" Chip interrupted, clearly irritated. "Well Chip, do you have any ideas?" Asked Dr. Bob. "Why don't we just walk through it and see what's on the other side?" Chip asked, "I thought that was what you were going to suggest." "Well, I was going to have the hamsters do that." "And what did you want the plastic explosives for?" "…Sometimes it's better if you don't know." Chip began to walk away. "You know what, If you're not going to take this seriously, I'm just gonna leave." "Okay, fine!" Dr. Bob said grudgingly, "We'll go with your plan. I don't know where to get that many hamsters anyway." Chip turned around and walked back proudly. “Hey, hey, hey! Hold the phone. Hold the phone!” Henry exclaimed, “Hold the phone for me, Pick.” “WHEEEEEEW!!!” Pick responded inaudibly. “You want us to go in that big purple portal!” Henry continued. “...Yeah!” Dr. Bob said after a very long pause. "But what if there's no oxygen on the other side and I can't hear?" Peter worried. "Oxygen is for eating, not hearing," said Franky. "Oh yeah, duh!" Peter agreed. Dr. Bob turned to face the enormous warp in the middle of the table. “Everyone line up beside me!” He commanded, “But don’t hold my hand, that’s weird.” The other klay men lined up beside him. “Okay, one the count of three... Chip’s gonna go first.” “What? Why do I have to go first?” Chip complained. “Because it was your idea,” said Dr. Bob “But don’t worry. No matter what happens in there, I’ll be perfectly safe.” Chip ignored Dr. Bob’s comment and stepped forward to the strange gateway. The closer he got to the portal the more he was overcome with the sense that he didn’t belong. He extended one stubby hand and touched the warp. It didn’t feel like anything. his stump passed through it as easily as if it were only empty air. Let’s hope there is oxygen on the other side, he thought. Then he stepped into the portal. For a long time, he couldn’t see anything, he couldn’t hear anything, and he couldn’t move. It was as if he, and everything else had disappeared, and nothing else in the universe existed anymore; but soon, vision and sound returned to him. The first thing he was able to see were the book shelves in Twilight’s library, and the first thing he heard was a loud thud as he landed face down on her desk. Chip had expected that no one else would follow him, that Dr. Bob and the others would leave and wait for him to return on his own, if at all; but, only a few moments later, Peter fell down on the desk too, then Henry, then Franky, then Pick, and finally Dr. Bob. They all lay down on the table for a few seconds, dazed from their journey. Chip was the first to move. He looked up and stared at the cluttered table. “Well, this isn’t too different.” He mumbled, “It’s a table just like klay world.” “Klay world, is that what you call where you’re from?” Twilight asked. She was standing in front of the table just as she had been, this time with a quill and notepad. The other klay men started to stir as well, but all of them stopped moving when they saw Twilight, the pastel colored unicorn that was roughly a hundred times their mass. Most of them stared, but Pick stood up, raised his arms and screamed as loud as he could. As an interesting side note, Pick has the potential to scream very, very loudly. “WWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-” “Oh, no! Please don’t be scared!” Twilight insisted. “-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-” Pick relentlessly continued. “Um...” Twilight looked around the room and saw a chocolate cupcake she had gotten from Sugarcube Corner earlier that day. She lifted it with her magic and placed it on the table in front of Pick. “Cupcake?” She asked hopefully. “-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-” “With extra frosting?” She added. “-AAAAAAA- Okay!” Pick finally stopped and swiped a chunk of frosting from the cupcake. When he lifted it to his head, a slit opened on his face that formed a mouth, something that klay men only show when they’re eating. He stuffed the frosting into his mouth, but got more on his face than anything else. Twilight gave out a sigh of relief, then turned to the other klay men that were still staring at her. “Um... hi...” she said awkwardly. I Accidentally Another DimensionBack in Klay World, that very same day (Which is the day before the day after the day before the next day! Or the day after the day before the next day if today was yesterday!) "Okay," One klay man said to another. He had a match and the other klay man was hiding a large stick. "I'm gonna light that little stick on fire, and if you let go of it, you're not a man!" "I AM A MAN!" The other klay man announced. The match holder lit the stick on fire. "Then prove it!" Sheriff Marv was paying no attention to this. After all, it isn't a police man's job to keep people from setting themselves on fire... He assumed. Instead, he was focusing all of his attention on a large walkie-talkie in his left hand. He put the object to his head and tried to talk into it. "Hello?" He said. No response. "Hello? ...Hello!?!" There was still no response. He got frustrated and threw the device on the ground. "Well, I tried three whole times and there was still no response... **sigh** ...they're probably dead already. This whole thing was just a big waste of time..." "Eeeeeexcuse me sir!" An enthusiastic voice called to Marv. The voice came from an average looking klay man with a small microphone in his right hand who was slowly waddling over to Marv. When the man was within arm's length, he spoke again into the mic he was holding. "Excuse me, Sheriff Marv, I was hoping I could have a few quick questions with you." Marv looked around, then turned his head to the reporter. "There aren't any cameras," he said. "Don't worry about that!" The reporter insisted, "I'm Mike Mc'Nanner from KW News and everybody in klay world wants to know: What is that big purple thing floating behind you?" Marv looked down and tried to think of something to say. He took off his yellow hat, wiped his forehead, and put the hat back. He finally began to talk. "Well, the truth is that this big thing behind me is some kind of portal. It seems to be connected to somewhere really far away. We sent a couple of klay men into it to investigate, but we can't keep in contact with them, they're probably dead by now." He leaned into the mic much closer, making his voice louder. "The most important thing you can do right now is panic! It is a perfectly natural response to danger." "Okay, you should probably drop the stick now, Fred." Said the klay man with the match. The klay man with the stick was now on fire, with flames enveloping the stick and his entire arm, and they were quickly spreading. "I AM A MAN!!!" The now flaming klay man exclaimed. ________________________________________________________________________________ The five klay men, excluding Pick, were standing on Twilight's desk and looking up at the monumental unicorn. None of them spoke, and their blank, blue faces offered little explanation as to what they were thinking, if they were thinking at all, that is. Twilight was trying to hide her look of concern. Those klay people were not meant to be in Equestria and she knew that. She thought making the portal so small would decrease the chances of other life forms slipping through, but now she was facing a potential disaster! Who knows what could happen something from a totally different world comes to Equestria? She needed to send them back as quickly as possible. Peter was standing directly behind Dr. Bob. He leaned forward and turned his head so that his mouth was directly next to Dr. Bob's ears and yelled, "What the Heck is that?" Dr. Bob jolted and said, "Jesus! I'm right next to you! You don't have to yell!" "I'm sorry I wasn't prepared. I just didn't expect you to go through the portal," Said Twilight, grabbing the klay men's attention. "Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Twilight Sparkle, and you are currently in a place called Equestria. I understand that the place you are from is called 'Klay World'. Is that correct?" "WHAT ARE YOU!?" Franky demanded. "I am a pony," Twilight quickly answered, "Unicorn, to be exact. Most of the residents of this world are ponies as well." "Hey, hey, hold on a second!" Henry shouted as he shook his arms, "Are you saying that everyone here is as big as you?" "Well, mostly," Twilight answered, "At least, most of the adults are." "Twilight? What's going on down there?" Spike's voice called from the top floor. "Okay, what was that?" Chip demanded. Spike began to walk down the library stairs into the view of Twilight and the klay men. "Twilight what was all that- WHOA!" he saw the klay men when he reached the foot of the stairs and cautiously approached the desk. "Twilight! Why are those things in the library?!" Twilight tried to explain herself. "I didn't-" "LOOK OUT TWILIGHT! IT'S A DINOSAUR!" Henry interrupted. Twilight and Spike both panned around the room and saw nothing. "Where?" Twilight asked. Henry ripped off a small piece of paper from one of the notes on the desk and crumpled it into a ball. "Look out!" He said, "It's coming from behind you!" He pointed at Spike. "I'm gonna get you!" Spike shook his head in annoyance. "I'm not a dinosaur, I'm- AWWW!" Henry threw the paper wad and it hit Spike directly in the eye. Spike then shut his eye tightly and covered it with his claw. "Take that, you stupid dinosaur!" Henry exclaimed. Then he began to kick his legs out to both sides and sway his body in a celebratory dance. "Du-du-da! du-du-da! Du-da-du-da-du-du-da!" He sang. Twilight looked down at the dancing klay man angrily. "I appreciate what you're trying to do, but Spike is not a dinosaur!" Henry stopped dancing. "He's not?" "No. He's a dragon," Twilight replied casually. "Okay, I'm getting out of here!" Chip said. He began to walk over to the portal, stepping around Pick who was sitting down and chewing on paper. However, when he was close enough to the portal to walk through it, it disappeared leaving nothing but a circular metal frame. "What the... WHAT HAPPENED TO THE PORTAL!" Chip began to panic. "...Oops," Said Peter. He was standing next to the metal box that made up the second part of the machine. Twilight twitched nervously. "What... did you do?" She managed to ask. Peter was holding two plugs in his hands, each connected to the portal frame. "Um... I'll put them back!" He ran behind the machine before Twilight could even instruct him. Spike was rubbing Twilight's shoulder to keep her calm. Peter walked out from behind the machine with his hands on his hips. "Good as new!" he said. Twilight looked at the portal frame. It was still off. Then she looked at the metal box which seemed to be plugged in properly. 'PING!' 'SCRATCH!' 'BOOM!!!' A large flash of light followed by a puff of smoke came out of the back of the machine. "Did you... Plug them in the right holes?" Twilight asked nervously. "Probably not." Peter stated without a hint of worry. 'BOOM!!!' Another flash of light and smoke came out from the machine, this time causing some of the metal plating to fall off. "He... He just connect the computer to the power source and the power source to the computer..." Twilight said in a daze. "It's okay Twilight! You can fix it!" Spike said frantically. Twilight tried to say something, but all that came out were a few scattered words and noises. She took in a deep breath, then plummeted to the floor, unconscious. After a long, awkward silence, Dr. Bob looked to the other klay people and said, "Well, what the hell was that all about? Right everybody?" IntroTo be brutally honest, the Klay People of Klay World may be the dumbest creatures who have ever lived. They are little more than blue blobs with stubby blue legs and arms. Their faces are almost as blank and featureless as their brains. The place these tiny things call home is little more than just a coffee table. They can find a way to make a disaster out of almost any situation: a spilled glass of water, a hot-dog stand, you name it, they can hurt themselves with it. They are truly the perfect examples of stupid. Klay people may not be smart enough to become doctors or scientists, but that doesn't stop them from pretending to be in much the same way a child would. Dr. Bob, is one example of this. This klay man can always be seen wearing a bloodied, white coat with a grey name tag pasted on it. His assistant, Pick, wears a name tag too, but no coat. Instead, Pick wears a very silly looking white hat. They look very unprofessional, which is appropriate considering that they are. Dr. Bob and his assistant were standing around a klay man who was lying on the table floor. "Just stand still and everything will be fine. You can trust me, I'm a doctor," Dr. Bob said. He held out one of his stumpy arms and his assistant, Pick, handed him a chainsaw. "Don't worry, sir, I'm gonna make that tummy ache all better." He said before starting up the gas powered saw. "I've done this before!" "Shouldn't I be asleep or something?" The klay man asked. "...Yes." Dr. Bob said, then continued with his procedure.
That One PortalDr. Bob lowered his chainsaw and wiped a bit of blood off of his featureless face. The former patient was now in three different sections on the ground; another unsuccessful operation. "Well, that guy whined a lot, huh, Pick?" Dr. Bob commented. "...Pick?" Pick was sitting down next to the fragmented body trying to pull two sections back together. "Pick!" Dr. Bob called. His assistant replied by glancing back at him. "Pick, get away from there. It's too late for him. You might get sick or something." Another blue, featureless klay man waddled behind the doctor and tapped him on the shoulder. "Um... Dr. B-" "Oh, Jesus!" Dr. Bob exclaimed as he jumped and turned to face the klay man. "Dr. Bob, I need to..." "You scared me!" Dr. Bob interrupted again. "Okay, sorry, but..." "I was scarred." The doctor interrupted a third time. "What do you want!?" "Well, I just had to tell you that..." "Spit it out!" "I, um..." The klay man kept attempting to talk, but each time he started to speak, he was interrupted again. "What do you want? Come on... Spit it out... I don't have all day... Come on." "PORTAL!" The klay man finally screamed. ________________________________________________________________________________ "Do you really think it's gonna work?" Spike asked. He was standing as tall as he could, using his claws to pull the top of his body above the table Twilight was working on. The wooden table was almost completely covered with papers, notes, and books, with only a few places where the brown oak wood could be seen. It was illuminated by a purple glow. In the center of the table, a purple, disk shaped light hovered up right. It was only about a foot in diameter. The purple light wasn't magical in nature, at least not completely. It was framed in a hollow, metal circle that was plugged into a metal cube through two power cords. "It looks awfully small, Twilight." Spike warned. "I don't even think I can fit through it!" "Well, you aren't supposed to." Twilight replied. "This is just a test run. Any unicorn can learn a teleportation spell, but creating a temporary warp could have hundreds of uses! Maybe they'll let me lead a lecture!" "How long should the power source last?" Spike asked curiously. "Only about two hours. But I can easily recharge it with my magic." Spike leaned over the table and gazed into the purple light. "What's on the other side of the portal?" He asked. Twilight lifted an orange ball. "That's what we're gonna find out!" "What does that ball do?" Spike asked. "It's sort of like that crystal ball queen Chrysalis used to monitor us when she fillynapped Applebloom and her friends. It should give us a perfect view of what's on the other side." ________________________________________________________________________________ Another purple warp had appeared in the middle of klay world. It was almost big enough to divide the table in half. A conglomeration of over twenty klay men stood on one side of the portal. Among them was Dr. Bob, Pick, and Sheriff Marv. Sheriff Marv always wears a yellow hard hat and has a burly brown mustache centered on his face. The crowd was murmuring and flailing their arms about. Most of them didn't seem too concerned. Marv projected with his nasally voice, "Okay everybody, calm down!" He said. His request was ignored. He pulled a hand gun from behind his back and fired into the air, then the others paid attention to him. "Okay, much better." He began, putting away his gun. "Now, as you have all noticed, there is a big purple thing that appeared on the table this morning." "I think it looks more like blueish red!" One Klay man shouted. "Well, no one cares about your opinion!" Marv snapped. "Anyway, we don't know what the hell it is. We don't know if it's dangerous or if it does something cool..." "I like cool things!" "NO ONE ASKED YOU!" Marv snapped again. "So, what we're planning to do is assemble a team of highly trained, super smart badasses; and they're gonna investigate this thing using the magic of science! And... Dr. Bob here is going to lead them." Marv gestured to Dr. Bob, who was standing behind him at the time. "WHAHOO!" Pick screamed while vibrating his head. "Hey, hey, hold on a second!" Dr. Bob exclaimed. He stepped forward a few inches. "I didn't volunteer for this!" "We love you, Dr. Bob!" someone screamed. Dr. Bob cupped his invisible mouth and yelled in the direction of the voice. "Shut up! You have no friends and your parents hate you!" He turned back to Marv. "Damn it, Marv, I'm a doctor not a scientist! What do you expect me to do?" Marv was about to reply, but before he could say anything, an orange ball that was larger than a klay man shot out from the portal and landed in the crowd of klay men. One klay person was crushed and the rest of the crown started to panic. "OH MY GOT!" "Has anyone seen my hotdog?" "WHAT IS THAT?" "Is it aliens again?" "I found the hotdog." "SOMEBODY CALL 991!" As the crowd began to disperse away from the mysterious object, Marv and Dr. Bob went in closer. "Should we touch it?" Marv asked.
Off The Table (again)!"Oh no!" Twilight said in shock. She and Spike were looking through an identical crystal ball. Inside it was a clear image of Marv, Dr. Bob, and all the klay people that surrounded the original ball on the other side of the portal. "I think it hurt one of them! How was I supposed to know there would be such small creatures on the other side?" Spike was fixated on the blue figures he saw on the inside of the ball. "What are they, Twilight?" He asked, "I've never seen anything like that in Equestria." "That's just it, Spike!" Twilight exclaimed, "I don't think this portal leads to Equestria!" Spike scratched the top of his head, puzzled. "Um... Are they from the moon?" "I don't think so." "... Sattle Arabia?" "Even less likely!" Twilight said, "I doubt they're even from this solar system! They may even be from another galaxy!" "Don't you think that's just a little dangerous, Twilight?!" Spike jumped. "I admit this is a little risky," Twilight said as she wrote down some quick notes on the Klay people. "but it's equally fascinating!" "But what if this is a mistake?" Spike said worried, "What if these things are dangerous? What if they're some kind of super intelligent beings with a thirst to conquer?" _______________________________________________________________________________ A few hours after the crystal ball came through the portal, Marv had finally gotten the crowd to disperse completely. Dr. Bob had agreed to do the job he was assigned with the promise of one thousand moneys, and had assembled a team to work with him. Pick, his faithful assistant; Henry, Peter, and Franky the lanky, the average klay men with no important backstories; and Chip, a klay man with a large dent in the top of his head, were all chosen to work for him in exchange for twenty moneys and one very big hug. They were all gathered between the portal and the orange ball. Dr. Bob was standing in front of them with a tiny, paper poster mounted on a stand made of toothpicks. The paper board had nothing but a bunch of illegible scribbles written on it. "Okay everybody," The doctor began, "Thank you all for coming... except for you, Chip." "Why did you even ask me to come if you don't want me here?" Chip asked. "The only reason I wanted you to come is because I thought it would be funny if you hurt yourself." Dr. Bob said harshly. "And the only reason I agreed was because I wanted to be with you... When you fail." Chip snapped back. Dr. Bob tried to think of a quick response. "Oh yeah well... You're a three year old!" "Ooh, good comeback," Chip said smugly. "Shut up with that attitude!" Dr. Bob swung his stumpy arms wildly and knocked down the paper board and toothpick stand. He looked at the mess he had made and sighed. "You see what you made me do?" "Was there even anything important written on that?" Chip asked. As the attention was diverted from the mess, Pick crawled over to the wreckage, grabbed the paper, and began chewing on it. "Of course there was important stuff on it!" Dr. Bob said defensively. "Those were... top secret, important plans... and, like, intel and stuff from our satellites!" "We don't have any satellites." Chip stated. "Your mom has satellites!" Franky the lanky interrupted. "Hah! Good one, Franky!" Said Peter. "ALL RIGHT, LISTEN UP!" Dr. Bob commanded, immediately silencing all the other klay men. "We're running out of time. Anyway, we already know that objects can travel through this... purple disk thing; and that means that things from here can also get to... whatever is on the other side of it." "Wow, that was actually a good observation, Dr. Bob." Chip said surprised. "Yeah, that's because I'm a friggin' genius." Dr. Bob bragged, "So all we need is an army of specially trained hamsters armed with plastic explosives." "And I will now take back my last compliment." Said Chip. A seventh klay man waddled next to Dr. Bob. He looked regular aside from the fact that he had no arms. "Hey guys!" He said excitedly, "Do you guys need help!?" "You don't have any arms..." Said Chip. "That doesn't matter!" The armless klay man insisted, "I can still lend a helping hand!" Dr. Bob pointed to the other side of the table. "Hey, you see that guy over there carrying that really heavy thing and walking near the edge of the table? Yeah, why don't you help him out with that." The armless klay man walked off in the direction that the doctor had pointed saying, "Hey! Let me help you out with that!" "HEY! NO, NOT YOU AGAIN! WHOA, WHOA! WHO-" **CRASH!** Dr. Bob turned back to his team and continued, "Okay, so about those hamsters…" "Would you forget about the hamsters!" Chip interrupted, clearly irritated. "Well Chip, do you have any ideas?" Asked Dr. Bob. "Why don't we just walk through it and see what's on the other side?" Chip asked, "I thought that was what you were going to suggest." "Well, I was going to have the hamsters do that." "And what did you want the plastic explosives for?" "…Sometimes it's better if you don't know." Chip began to walk away. "You know what, If you're not going to take this seriously, I'm just gonna leave." "Okay, fine!" Dr. Bob said grudgingly, "We'll go with your plan. I don't know where to get that many hamsters anyway." Chip turned around and walked back proudly. “Hey, hey, hey! Hold the phone. Hold the phone!” Henry exclaimed, “Hold the phone for me, Pick.” “WHEEEEEEW!!!” Pick responded inaudibly. “You want us to go in that big purple portal!” Henry continued. “...Yeah!” Dr. Bob said after a very long pause. "But what if there's no oxygen on the other side and I can't hear?" Peter worried. "Oxygen is for eating, not hearing," said Franky. "Oh yeah, duh!" Peter agreed. Dr. Bob turned to face the enormous warp in the middle of the table. “Everyone line up beside me!” He commanded, “But don’t hold my hand, that’s weird.” The other klay men lined up beside him. “Okay, one the count of three... Chip’s gonna go first.” “What? Why do I have to go first?” Chip complained. “Because it was your idea,” said Dr. Bob “But don’t worry. No matter what happens in there, I’ll be perfectly safe.” Chip ignored Dr. Bob’s comment and stepped forward to the strange gateway. The closer he got to the portal the more he was overcome with the sense that he didn’t belong. He extended one stubby hand and touched the warp. It didn’t feel like anything. his stump passed through it as easily as if it were only empty air. Let’s hope there is oxygen on the other side, he thought. Then he stepped into the portal. For a long time, he couldn’t see anything, he couldn’t hear anything, and he couldn’t move. It was as if he, and everything else had disappeared, and nothing else in the universe existed anymore; but soon, vision and sound returned to him. The first thing he was able to see were the book shelves in Twilight’s library, and the first thing he heard was a loud thud as he landed face down on her desk. Chip had expected that no one else would follow him, that Dr. Bob and the others would leave and wait for him to return on his own, if at all; but, only a few moments later, Peter fell down on the desk too, then Henry, then Franky, then Pick, and finally Dr. Bob. They all lay down on the table for a few seconds, dazed from their journey. Chip was the first to move. He looked up and stared at the cluttered table. “Well, this isn’t too different.” He mumbled, “It’s a table just like klay world.” “Klay world, is that what you call where you’re from?” Twilight asked. She was standing in front of the table just as she had been, this time with a quill and notepad. The other klay men started to stir as well, but all of them stopped moving when they saw Twilight, the pastel colored unicorn that was roughly a hundred times their mass. Most of them stared, but Pick stood up, raised his arms and screamed as loud as he could. As an interesting side note, Pick has the potential to scream very, very loudly. “WWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-” “Oh, no! Please don’t be scared!” Twilight insisted. “-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-” Pick relentlessly continued. “Um...” Twilight looked around the room and saw a chocolate cupcake she had gotten from Sugarcube Corner earlier that day. She lifted it with her magic and placed it on the table in front of Pick. “Cupcake?” She asked hopefully. “-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-” “With extra frosting?” She added. “-AAAAAAA- Okay!” Pick finally stopped and swiped a chunk of frosting from the cupcake. When he lifted it to his head, a slit opened on his face that formed a mouth, something that klay men only show when they’re eating. He stuffed the frosting into his mouth, but got more on his face than anything else. Twilight gave out a sigh of relief, then turned to the other klay men that were still staring at her. “Um... hi...” she said awkwardly.
I Accidentally Another DimensionBack in Klay World, that very same day (Which is the day before the day after the day before the next day! Or the day after the day before the next day if today was yesterday!) "Okay," One klay man said to another. He had a match and the other klay man was hiding a large stick. "I'm gonna light that little stick on fire, and if you let go of it, you're not a man!" "I AM A MAN!" The other klay man announced. The match holder lit the stick on fire. "Then prove it!" Sheriff Marv was paying no attention to this. After all, it isn't a police man's job to keep people from setting themselves on fire... He assumed. Instead, he was focusing all of his attention on a large walkie-talkie in his left hand. He put the object to his head and tried to talk into it. "Hello?" He said. No response. "Hello? ...Hello!?!" There was still no response. He got frustrated and threw the device on the ground. "Well, I tried three whole times and there was still no response... **sigh** ...they're probably dead already. This whole thing was just a big waste of time..." "Eeeeeexcuse me sir!" An enthusiastic voice called to Marv. The voice came from an average looking klay man with a small microphone in his right hand who was slowly waddling over to Marv. When the man was within arm's length, he spoke again into the mic he was holding. "Excuse me, Sheriff Marv, I was hoping I could have a few quick questions with you." Marv looked around, then turned his head to the reporter. "There aren't any cameras," he said. "Don't worry about that!" The reporter insisted, "I'm Mike Mc'Nanner from KW News and everybody in klay world wants to know: What is that big purple thing floating behind you?" Marv looked down and tried to think of something to say. He took off his yellow hat, wiped his forehead, and put the hat back. He finally began to talk. "Well, the truth is that this big thing behind me is some kind of portal. It seems to be connected to somewhere really far away. We sent a couple of klay men into it to investigate, but we can't keep in contact with them, they're probably dead by now." He leaned into the mic much closer, making his voice louder. "The most important thing you can do right now is panic! It is a perfectly natural response to danger." "Okay, you should probably drop the stick now, Fred." Said the klay man with the match. The klay man with the stick was now on fire, with flames enveloping the stick and his entire arm, and they were quickly spreading. "I AM A MAN!!!" The now flaming klay man exclaimed. ________________________________________________________________________________ The five klay men, excluding Pick, were standing on Twilight's desk and looking up at the monumental unicorn. None of them spoke, and their blank, blue faces offered little explanation as to what they were thinking, if they were thinking at all, that is. Twilight was trying to hide her look of concern. Those klay people were not meant to be in Equestria and she knew that. She thought making the portal so small would decrease the chances of other life forms slipping through, but now she was facing a potential disaster! Who knows what could happen something from a totally different world comes to Equestria? She needed to send them back as quickly as possible. Peter was standing directly behind Dr. Bob. He leaned forward and turned his head so that his mouth was directly next to Dr. Bob's ears and yelled, "What the Heck is that?" Dr. Bob jolted and said, "Jesus! I'm right next to you! You don't have to yell!" "I'm sorry I wasn't prepared. I just didn't expect you to go through the portal," Said Twilight, grabbing the klay men's attention. "Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Twilight Sparkle, and you are currently in a place called Equestria. I understand that the place you are from is called 'Klay World'. Is that correct?" "WHAT ARE YOU!?" Franky demanded. "I am a pony," Twilight quickly answered, "Unicorn, to be exact. Most of the residents of this world are ponies as well." "Hey, hey, hold on a second!" Henry shouted as he shook his arms, "Are you saying that everyone here is as big as you?" "Well, mostly," Twilight answered, "At least, most of the adults are." "Twilight? What's going on down there?" Spike's voice called from the top floor. "Okay, what was that?" Chip demanded. Spike began to walk down the library stairs into the view of Twilight and the klay men. "Twilight what was all that- WHOA!" he saw the klay men when he reached the foot of the stairs and cautiously approached the desk. "Twilight! Why are those things in the library?!" Twilight tried to explain herself. "I didn't-" "LOOK OUT TWILIGHT! IT'S A DINOSAUR!" Henry interrupted. Twilight and Spike both panned around the room and saw nothing. "Where?" Twilight asked. Henry ripped off a small piece of paper from one of the notes on the desk and crumpled it into a ball. "Look out!" He said, "It's coming from behind you!" He pointed at Spike. "I'm gonna get you!" Spike shook his head in annoyance. "I'm not a dinosaur, I'm- AWWW!" Henry threw the paper wad and it hit Spike directly in the eye. Spike then shut his eye tightly and covered it with his claw. "Take that, you stupid dinosaur!" Henry exclaimed. Then he began to kick his legs out to both sides and sway his body in a celebratory dance. "Du-du-da! du-du-da! Du-da-du-da-du-du-da!" He sang. Twilight looked down at the dancing klay man angrily. "I appreciate what you're trying to do, but Spike is not a dinosaur!" Henry stopped dancing. "He's not?" "No. He's a dragon," Twilight replied casually. "Okay, I'm getting out of here!" Chip said. He began to walk over to the portal, stepping around Pick who was sitting down and chewing on paper. However, when he was close enough to the portal to walk through it, it disappeared leaving nothing but a circular metal frame. "What the... WHAT HAPPENED TO THE PORTAL!" Chip began to panic. "...Oops," Said Peter. He was standing next to the metal box that made up the second part of the machine. Twilight twitched nervously. "What... did you do?" She managed to ask. Peter was holding two plugs in his hands, each connected to the portal frame. "Um... I'll put them back!" He ran behind the machine before Twilight could even instruct him. Spike was rubbing Twilight's shoulder to keep her calm. Peter walked out from behind the machine with his hands on his hips. "Good as new!" he said. Twilight looked at the portal frame. It was still off. Then she looked at the metal box which seemed to be plugged in properly. 'PING!' 'SCRATCH!' 'BOOM!!!' A large flash of light followed by a puff of smoke came out of the back of the machine. "Did you... Plug them in the right holes?" Twilight asked nervously. "Probably not." Peter stated without a hint of worry. 'BOOM!!!' Another flash of light and smoke came out from the machine, this time causing some of the metal plating to fall off. "He... He just connect the computer to the power source and the power source to the computer..." Twilight said in a daze. "It's okay Twilight! You can fix it!" Spike said frantically. Twilight tried to say something, but all that came out were a few scattered words and noises. She took in a deep breath, then plummeted to the floor, unconscious. After a long, awkward silence, Dr. Bob looked to the other klay people and said, "Well, what the hell was that all about? Right everybody?"
IntroTo be brutally honest, the Klay People of Klay World may be the dumbest creatures who have ever lived. They are little more than blue blobs with stubby blue legs and arms. Their faces are almost as blank and featureless as their brains. The place these tiny things call home is little more than just a coffee table. They can find a way to make a disaster out of almost any situation: a spilled glass of water, a hot-dog stand, you name it, they can hurt themselves with it. They are truly the perfect examples of stupid. Klay people may not be smart enough to become doctors or scientists, but that doesn't stop them from pretending to be in much the same way a child would. Dr. Bob, is one example of this. This klay man can always be seen wearing a bloodied, white coat with a grey name tag pasted on it. His assistant, Pick, wears a name tag too, but no coat. Instead, Pick wears a very silly looking white hat. They look very unprofessional, which is appropriate considering that they are. Dr. Bob and his assistant were standing around a klay man who was lying on the table floor. "Just stand still and everything will be fine. You can trust me, I'm a doctor," Dr. Bob said. He held out one of his stumpy arms and his assistant, Pick, handed him a chainsaw. "Don't worry, sir, I'm gonna make that tummy ache all better." He said before starting up the gas powered saw. "I've done this before!" "Shouldn't I be asleep or something?" The klay man asked. "...Yes." Dr. Bob said, then continued with his procedure.
