Rehab with Bright Colors

Hex was infinitely glad that he had the mind to grab some standard issue gear and store it in his back compartment before shit hit the fan. Popping the seal on the plastic package the only actually cloths to his name was a pair of fatigue pants, underwear, a stretchy under shirt and a pair of socks and boots. Maybe this Rarity pony could make him something more with just these, he could always get back into his suit if need be but if they were going out to get shitty drunk he'd have to be careful not to ruin his only set of cloths.

Scooping up the bulky bag of coins Shiny had dropped he opened it to find it filled with gold coins with a stylized one on them. He had no idea how much stuff costs so he simply filled his cargo pockets with them until they bulged. With a smirk he left his room to find Vinyl studiously looking at a vase he knew she didn't give a damn about. She had acquired headphones from somewhere but how they functioned or even played music was a mystery but since she wasn't paying attention he took the time to sneak up on her.

It was still easy to pick her up in a bear hug but without his suit he lost about a foot of height and 800 pounds of weight, still she was even more soft and fluffy than he imagined as he nuzzled her mane.

"HEY WOAH PERSONAL SPACE MUCH?!"

She stopped struggling when she realized it was him and cocked an eyebrow at him. "I didn't know you were into ponies Hex..."

"Says the first ever human cock examiner..."

"Dude you were flopping the thing about, I was in shock."

"My dick has that effect on most woman."

"PPFFFFT"

Putting her down she gave him a look over before poking his arm with a hoof and rubbing his skin. "Woah.... Not even a little bit of fur... Crazy smooth."

It was kinda cool being examined... then again he was basically an alien. It stopped being so cool when she buried her face into his stomach and inhaled deeply. "You smell really good...."

"Oook that's enough of that miss. Its officially become uncomfortably awkward."

"Says the guy who has no problem waving his dick in the air at a Mare and a Stallion...."

"I was just doing the after bath time ritual that is sacred and passed down from generation to generation."

Snorting a laugh Vinyl led the way down the halls and after a few turnarounds they finally made it back outside into the grand city. He hadn't noticed how long they had been in the castle, and already the sun was dipping down in the sky as day faded into night. There were still ponies milling about but all stopped to stare and gawk at the creature walking amongst them.

Over by what looked like a bulletin board many of them were gathered around reading a news letter when one of them gasped and pointed in their direction. There were a few brave enough to walk (or trot) up to them but as soon as Hex turned to look at them the poor things scurried away.

A few pokes and prods from Vinyl kept him moving until they came to a shady looking establishment that had no advertising anywhere in sight but did have bouncers outside of the front doors. A wink from Vinyl was all they needed to open the doors but Hex could only smile when they eyed him, more so when they turned a bit green after noticing the canines.

So when a lady takes you out for drinks, especially if its an alien that no pony had ever seen, the establishment would be at least a little on the mellow side. But oh no, while the outside looked regular enough the inside was nothing but plush crimson couches, polished tables, a wide dance floor, and a cat walk complete with pole as well as a mare twirled about in lingerie.

While there was something ridiculously provocative seeing a pony in lingerie when most of them were naked anyways once more everything quieted down when they walked in. Hex walked up to the bar running along the wall and asked the bar keep for three mugs of the house's finest on tap. Things were still quite with the exception of murmuring, even the pole dancer stopped to stare, but when they got their drinks he slid one to Vinyl before turning back to the ponies staring.

Lifting his left leg up he slammed his booted foot down on the short stool hard enough to cause the legs to crack, the sound echoing throughout the club. Placing his fists on his hips he announced to the masses loudly and without hesitation.

"MY NAME IS HEX! I AM HERE TO GET DRUNK AND EAT PUSSY! IF YOU ARE NOT HERE FOR THE SAME..... THEN YOU ARE NOT DRUNK ENOUGH!"

Total silence with the exception of Vinyl face hoofing so hard the thunk could be heard by everyone. On the other side of the bar, the biggest, muscle bound stallion with the tiniest wings he had ever seen got up and yelled.

"BUCK YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH"

Pointing at the third drink beside him then pointing back at the stallion he roared in response.

"DRINK WITH ME!"

Stomping his way down the bar the stallion actually snorted steam as he smiled insanely, seizing the mug and slamming it into Hex's to create an explosion of foam. Both knocked the drinks back, and all Hex could taste was apple flavored fire as he forced himself to chug it down. He had found his illegitimate brother born on another planet, because the moment they both finished they raised their mugs and slammed them into the bar hard enough to cause the wooden tankards to explode into little more than fragments before roaring in each others face.

"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH"

Turning back to the shocked ponies Hex pointed at everyone and roared one last time.

"SHOTS! SHOTS FOR EVERYONE!"

The uproar of approval from the ponies could be heard for blocks as they crowded around the bar with the others gathering close behind them. Hex and his unnamed brother drummed fists and hooves on the bar top and were quickly mimicked by those who could crowd around. Shots of amber fire floated while the bar tenders flocked about pouring the shots, and as the tempo rose with a drink in front of ever soul Hex and the guy to his right stop to snatch the shots before knocking them back.

Shots were taken, heads leaned back, and the roar of approval came from that came from every pony shook the entire building. Looking around even the bartenders had taken shots, and through the doors burst two royal guards ready for a fight.

"WHAT THE BUCK IS GOING ON IN HERE!"

They both looked young to Hex, so with a crazed smile he pointed at the two of them and yelled to the frenzied crowd. "BRING THEM UP"

The clubbers surrounded the poor guards, and while they struggled there were just too many innocent ponies around to do anything about it. Hex leaned down and brought the pole dancer and Vinyl closer, whispering pure wickedness and corruption into their ears until both smiled deviously and leaned up on the on the bar and perked their asses into the air.

Bringing a bar tender in close he whispered his plan which brought a crazy smile to his face before he poured four shots. Hex signaled for his brother to hop on onto the bar he handed him two shots before balancing the other two on each of Vinyl's cheeks. Following suit both stood on the bar and smiled with madness as the guards were deposited in front of the pair of asses.

Hex pointed with his fingers jabbing the at the shots while his bro pointed with his hooves.

"DRINK DRINK DRINK DRINK DRINK DRINK"

The chant was taken up by all the clubbers, the bar tenders, and even the bouncers as both blushed solid red looking at the inviting drinks. Both took the first shot in their teeth as silence reigned over their defeat, and as they knocked back the second shot both spat the glasses out and gave the respective girl who presented them the drinks a kiss on the ass.

Holy fuck Hex thought the windows would shatter with the cheer that went up, and reaching into his bulging cargo pockets he crouched down and littered the bar with the gold coins. Immediately everyone started pushing coins onto the bar and calling for more rounds, three others bought a round for the entire house and as Hex looked around at the chaos, cheering, and two royal guards being escorted out with two pole dancers a piece kissing them on the cheeks. It was the most fun he's had in years.

Whatever the fuck the ponies drank to get liquored up was already flooding his brain with warmth, the two fists full of money he put on the bar top was nothing compared to the ankle deep heaps of money now crowding the bar top and still ponies were drinking and calling for more.

The number of bartenders had doubled, and two of them were scooping heaps of coins into bags and with a quick pat down he knew his own funds were far from diminished. A tug from his leg brought his eyes down to Vinyl who was smiling with a shine of red on her cheeks.

She gave him a sultry smile before beckoning him to the dance floor, and the moment she cleared the crowd she stood on her hind legs and pivoted around in a very captivating manner drawing the eyes of the patrons. Three shots were handed to him, and three shots were killed as Hex headed out onto the floor to dance with Vinyl, followed by every dancer the club had and all the mares besides. A cheer came up when the music started to throb through the crowd.

He was going to be so fucking wrecked before the night was over. Ponies it seemed could party hard and it appeared he had created a new drinking game aptly dubbed "Flank Shots" that was repeated in earnest by the pole dancers.