The Kings of the Everfree

Rarity lay on Fluttershy's couch, bawling. She was in absolute hysterics. “Oh, it'll be alright, Rarity, I'm sure she just wandered off. She'll be back soon, and I'll have all my little friends keep an eye out for her, OK?” Fluttershy's voice was strained over the sobs of the unicorn.

“BUT SHE RAN INTO THE EVERFREE FOREST!!! If anything happened to my dear, precious Opal, I...I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'D DO!!!!” Rarity replied, a blubbering mess. She grabbed Angel, who had been sitting on the arm of the couch, appraising her with his standard glare. She clung to the bunny as if squeezing him would cause emotional comfort to shoot out like toothpaste from a tube.

Angel kicked her in the face and hopped down to the floor. “Oh, Angel!” Fluttershy was taken aback by this behavior. “Rarity's in distress! She needs us to be supportive!”

“I can do better than supportive,” the bunny told himself, “I can get her out of my damn cottage.” Fluttershy frowned at the coarse choice of non-words, though she could only really understand the intent behind them. She watched with worry as he began hopping over to the open front door.

“Oh dear, um...” Fluttershy frantically looked between him and Rarity. “Don't wander too far!” She told Angel, praying that he would be obedient, but knowing it was in vain. Still, Angel knew how to take care of himself. Fluttershy knew that he was the strength and confidence she lacked made flesh. She nuzzled Rarity.

“See, Rarity? Angel's already going to go look.” She nervously told the unicorn, patting her with her wing.

“Every time. Every freaking time somepony has a problem with their pet, they have to barge into my house, disturb my pony, and make us fix the damn problem.” Angel thought, glowering at the world around him, built to a scale he did not fit. “Lucky me, I know someone who knows how to solve problems.” He hopped his way down to Sugar Cube Corner, walked through the open door, and hopped up the stairs. He looked up at the door and sighed.

“I just hope he's home alone.” He thumped his foot rapidly against the door. It swung open, a pink, grinning pony looming over the bunny. “Ah, crap.”

For the second time today, Angel was plucked by one of his pony's friends, being cuddled degradingly. Unfortunately, the earth pony had a stronger grip than Rarity, and wasn't distracted by her own face full of tears. “I should only be so lucky.” Angel mused. Finally, she set him down, ran off, and came back, setting down her own pet toothless alligator.

The two pets gave eachother some greetings. “We got a kitty missing in the Everfree, and a unicorn bawling on my couch. You in?”

“You even have to ask?” Gummy smiled a bit.

Pinkie gave off a huge grin as she offered up two pairs of tiny sunglasses and two tiny rust colored jackets. “I love it when you guys go on adventures! Gummy always comes back with such amazing stories!”

“...Can she even understand you?” Angel asked the alligator, thinking it a better question than exactly where the tiny sunglasses and jackets came from.

“Beats me. I didn't even tell her. She just...knows." They shared an uncomfortable moment of silence. "Anyway! Let's do this.”

They slid their arms into their jackets in unison. They each pulled downward on the front of the jackets together, adjusting them on their shoulders. They simultaneously flicked open their shades, and slid them onto their faces. Their palms echoed with the force of impact against each other for their high five. Pinkie hopped up and down, clapping her hooves giddily.

Angel smiled and hopped onto Gummy's back. He rode the alligator out of the room, down the stairs, and out of the bakery. The partners wandered through town, attracting a few looks from ponies, but without Fluttershy there to scold him, Angel simply answered their questioning gazes with an expressive mid-digit. Soon, they neared the edge of the Everfree forest. Glowing eyes, much like their first foray into the dark and foreboding wood, lined the trees.

Both Angel and Gummy felt the corners of their mouths turn up a bit as they continued forward, the Timber Wolves moving backward to make room. One or two even seemed to bow their heads in respect, though it seemed more likely that they were afraid of drawing the attention of the two animals, both so much smaller and neither with any magic to their names.

“It's good to be the king,” both said in unison. It had over a month since their first trip into the forest, and there had been several since, and the respect every creature they met showed to them continued to grow, and all without ever actually killing anything. Their mercy earned them at least as much respect as their brutality and competence. Still, they weren't here to lord over their subjects. Angel picked out one of the wolves.

“You! There's a little white cat somewhere in this forest. We are looking for her. We want her found, we want her unharmed. Put the word out.” The wolf felt the will of the rabbit burning into him. He just stared, terrified of the bunny. “Well? I'm waiting.” It dashed off through the trees, howling to every other Timber Wolf in the forest.

“She should be fine.” Gummy told his partner. “If she's smart, I mean. She mentions either of our names, everybody's going to wait for us to show up.”

“When have you known Opalescence to be smart? No, she's either lost or captured or turned to stone. That's if she's not been eaten. So, I say we check with the Cockatrices first.”

“Seems like a safe bet. Manticores would be keeping her safe, they see cats as family. And Timber Wolves would do nothing to anyone if they know what's good for them.” Gummy added, remembering his partner's decree that no killing was to be done for any reason but food or self defense, and the magical biology of the Timber Wolf necessitated neither unless fire was involved. “So, Cockatrice sounds like the worst case scenario. And, if a Cockatrice did get her, we'd need another one to break her out.” Angel nodded at this.

“So all we gotta--...is that Jimmy?” He asked, pointing at a snake tail being dragged by a chicken through the forest.

“Son of a bitch, it is. HEY, JIMMY.” Gummy shouted. The Cockatrice froze in his tracks and slowly turned around. “How much of what we were saying did you hear? Did you know we were looking for a Cockatrice and just decide to ignore us?”

“Look, guys...” He stammered, quickly correcting himself. “Your majesties...I wasn't gonna run off or nothin', I was gonna go ask around. See if anybody I knew, knew the cat you were talkin' about.” He stammered nervously. “Figured I'd be more useful gathering information than just following you around, in case I had to crack open a stone prison someone put him in.”

“It's a her.” Angel corrected. “I don't want you missing any leads because you're looking for a tom.”

“So, you DO want me to go look for leads?” Angel nodded at him. Jimmy relaxed. The Kings apparently found his idea viable. “Alright, I'll come running the moment I find anything.” He charged off, and Gummy glanced up at Angel.

“He's better connected to the other Cockatrice than we are. And he knows better than to cross us. We go asking around, they might get defensive and think they're better off hiding her rock body than owning up to it.” The bunny explained his reasoning. “Besides, having him following us around isn't really on my to-do list. I don't really like Jimmy.”

“You don't really like anybody.” Gummy commented as they continued on. “Guess we're checking with the Manticores now.”

“Yeah. Next most likely possibility.” Angel sat for a moment in silence. “You're wrong, you know.”

“Hm?”

“There's three people I like. And three people I respect. On both lists, there's you, Fluttershy, and me.” He adjusted his shades, and examined his jacket. “Your pony might make it onto the first list though. We look amazing.” Gummy smiled at this, chuckling.

“I like you too, Angel.” He told the bunny, grinning.

“Aw, now don't get sappy on me. I might have to drop you from the respect list.” Gummy bust out laughing in response as Angel smiled. They soon resumed walking in silence. There was something in their friendship, their partnership, that didn't need communication. There was an odd sense of understanding between them that had been there since the first time they met. They felt perfectly comfortable, stoically journeying through the dark and twisted forest with no sense of apprehension.

Finally, they came along a clearing wherein several manticores watched as two of their biggest males lashed at each other with claw and tail. Things died down very quickly as the overwhelming presence of the Kings dominated the perception of those around them.

“Hope we're not interrupting?” Angel asked, lowering his shades and glaring over the rim as he climbed off of Gummy. One of the fighting manticores held up his paws.

“Hey, hey, we weren't fighting to kill or for territory or nothin'. It's a dominance thing, I swear. You guys lead the forest, and the manticores in it. We're just deciding which manticore answers straight to you.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Any manticore we want to talk to answers straight to us,” Gummy told him flatly. “And right now we're talking to you. What's your name?”

“Mikhail.” The manticore replied nervously.

“We're looking for someone. A friend of a friend of a friend. Went missing in the woods. She's a little white cat. Very fluffy, and kind of a bitch.” Angel told him. He eyed one of the manticores who'd been watching the fight, and was now shifting around suspiciously. “You know something?” he asked, glaring at the manticore.

“Th-that's Edward. He's still nervous since that mistake he made, when you first came here. Still having a little trouble talking.” Angel thought for a moment about what Mikhail told him.

“Ah, Edward. I'm sorry you made me put you in your place,” Angel told him, “But nobody in this forest has any reason to be afraid of us, long as they give us the proper respect. You read me?”

“Lowdan cleer.” He slurred, at least one puncture in his tongue still in the process of healing over.

Gummy looked around. “None of you know anything? Little white cat. Collar with some jewels on it.” Some eyes lit up at this last bit. “I miss something?” Mikhail spoke again.

“W-well, your highness..es...A dragon came here. It's not uncommon, they do that a lot, move in and out of the caves...But...Well, a jewel is going to catch a dragon's eye.”

Before they could even register this, they received their confirmation. “Dragon got her,” came a shout from behind. Angel and Gummy turned to see Jimmy, with a young Cockatrice beside him. “Cerise saw it! She saw him coming home to his cave with a cat!”

“Alright, kid, you're leading us to the dragon.” Angel told her. She shook her downy head in fear, eyes wide.

“I...I can't let her do that.” Jimmy stepped forward, shaking in fear. “She's my sister's kid, and...a dragon...I mean, I know what you guys can do, but we burn, just like anything else. Please, don't take her.” Angel and Gummy exchanged a meaningful glance.

“Alright, Jimmy. Fair enough. Family does come first.” Gummy told him. Angel stepped forward, the child trembling before him.

“She's cute. Must not take after her uncle.” He patted her head. “Can you tell us where the dragon lives?”  She nodded and pointed. “Thanks kid. You did good. You too, Jimmy. But I still don't like you.” Angel climbed back onto Gummy.

“...I think you're alright, Jimmy. I'm not sure if I like you or not.” Gummy told him in a tone that could almost be considered reassuring.

It was almost an hour before they saw the mouth of the cave, but they knew that the kid was raised here. Any creature born in the Everfree Forest would know its way around. Even if it had taken all day, if they kept the course, they were sure they'd find the cave.

“Want to make a plan?” Gummy asked, a little serious, a little sarcastic.

“Since when do we need plans?” Angel responded, smiling, as he climbed down. Together they stepped into the cave to find a massive horde of treasure, an even more massive sleeping dragon, and in the corner, a cage with a trembling white cat, stripped of her jeweled collar. “Sup, bitch.” Angel called to her. The dragon awoke at this and reared up. “Sup, bitch.” Angel repeated to the dragon. He began hopping over to the cage.

“What's this? Little morsels have come into my home of their own accord?” The dragon asked, laughing. Gummy was watching Angel, who was staring at Opal, who was busy trying to figure out why Fluttershy and Pinkie's pets were in a dragon's cave. “...YOU DARE IGNORE ME?”

“Your pony's in my cottage, crying her eyes out. I get you back, she leaves. So come on.” The dragon let out a roar of frustration at this indignity. He began sucking in air, preparing to loose a torrent of fire on the bunny and cat both. The moment he began to inhale, Angel kicked up a piece of treasure at the edge of the pile, and kicked it again in mid air, right into the dragon's windpipe. It began choking, unable to breathe, unable to speak, unable to even cough.

“Gummy, that moron went and got himself choked. Don't worry too much about saving him, but if you can, go ahead and do it.” Angel said, looking at the cage.

“W...What's going on?! Why would you come to the Everfree forest? Even if Rarity was at your home...”

“...We run this joint.” Gummy told her, walking up to the dragon's neck. He faced away just below the bulge of the obstruction and slammed his tail down powerfully, sending the gem stone rocketing out. “And if our guest the dragon wants to stay here, he'd best remember it.” The dragon coughed blood, the gem having cut small channels into its throat as it shot out to his mouth.

Angel removed the lock from the cage with a well placed kick, and went toward the entrance, willing to leave the dragon coughing and crumpled in his cave. They stopped, however, as something dawned on Angel.

“The lady's jewelry. Where is it?” He demanded, not even bothering to turn back to face the dragon.

The dragon's eyes went wide, filled with anger. These insolent creatures came into his home, choked him with his own treasure, caused his throat to carved on the interior, and stole his snack, and now they demanded jewels of him. He was fairly certain that the kick sending the stone down his throat had been nothing but luck. On the other hand, he was already weakened. He couldn't breathe fire with his throat torn like it was, and there was no way he'd be as fast as these small creatures. Besides, what if it wasn't a lucky shot? The dragon, after a moment of silent contemplation, gave in. He couldn't risk it. He tossed her collar forward, and Gummy caught it in his mouth. The three of them journeyed back out of the Everfree Forest to Ponyville, stopping on the way to call off the search, their quarry found.

Angel wasn't sure if Opal's uncharacteristic silence was because of the shock of seeing them in action, or because she was traumatized by the ordeal, but he didn't care. He was just glad she wasn't talking. Angel handed Gummy his shades and draped his jacket over the alligator's back. No reason not to let Pinkie take care of them.

Opal jumped, shocked, as Angel took her collar from Gummy, and put it on her, proceeding to slap some twigs and brush out of her fur.

“Why...Why did you save me? You hate me.” She asked, incredulous.

“Yes.” He answered at first, then frowned. Hatred not withstanding, she'd asked a genuine question and seemed genuinely confused. “Because,” Angel picked some burrs out of her fur. “I can't allow that kind of misbehavior in my forest. But more importantly, your pony won't get the hell off my couch.” He began walking toward his cottage, but she didn't move. “...Well?”

“And why did you stop to get me back my collar?”

“Because it belongs to you. He was stealing from, and planning to eat, someone who should have our protection, even if she doesn't have our blessing to enter the forest. We enforce that place's rules. Rules we enacted. Now can we PLEASE get your crazy pony out of my house?”

Opal moved up beside him, staring at him a bit, and kissed him on the cheek. The perpetual scowl melted from Angel Bunny's face as he slowly turned to meet her eyes. “Opal?”

“Yes?” She purred.

“You do realize,” His scowl began to slowly fall back into place, “The only reason you got away with that, the reason I am not HURTING YOU right now is that you'd be at my house that much longer, as a patient of Fluttershy's?”

“I do. But I still felt I owed you my thanks. I just wish I had thought to give it to Gummy before he left.” She began toward the cottage, smirking.

This was why Angel hated that cat. Absolutely no respect. They soon reached Angel's home, and he smiled as karma took the form of Rarity nearly squeezing the life out of the cat. Fluttershy gave Opalescence a quick check over, and she was given a clean bill of health. Rarity took the insufferable feline home, and Angel took back his couch, stretching out on the cushions. He heard the soft clink of a dish against the floor, and looked over to see Fluttershy standing over a salad and smiling at him.

“That was very nice of you, Angel Bunny.” She told him sweetly.

“I didn't do it to be nice.” He muttered, glancing over the edge of the couch at the food.

“You still helped. And I'm proud of you.” She kissed the top of his head, and he smiled at her, hopping down and gorging himself on the meal he'd been provided. Mid way through the meal, he paused and hugged her leg.

Deeper inside Ponyville, Gummy was climbing the stairs in Sugar Cube Corner, but didn't make it all the way up the stairs before a pink blur swept him up and into his home. Pinkie paused to take the jackets and sunglasses from him, then picked him up in her hooves, flopped onto her back, and held him aloft, staring into his big purple eyes.

“Tell me about Jimmy's niece! OH! No, tell me about the dragon!!!” she squealed excitedly.

“...The scary part is, I know you haven't been following us.” Gummy told her, still not sure if Pinkie could understand him.