The Host of Insanity

The sensation. The feeling. It was...indescribable. I had an idea of what was happening, but even with my ability, I was unable to suppress my surprise, and my pain. I felt as though I was a bullet, shot at supersonic speeds, into a solid steel wall, shattering on impact. I could feel myself, slowly coming apart at the seams, my atoms breaking apart, only to reform, and break apart again. The pain was unlike anything I had ever experienced before, I could feel every atom of m being being ripped apart, each one was a dagger in my side. After having been broken and reformed more time than I could possibly count, I felt myself falling. I panicked, not knowing how far down I was falling, or how fast. I turned my head, only to be met with a branch from an oncoming tree. I felt my head snap back, and I heard the branch break, along with a couple shouts and screams. Then all was black.

I woke up to see a familiar sight, if a bit unexpected. I saw what appeared to be the Apple Family Barn. The hay I was lying on was fresh, the wooden support beams sported a new coat of bright red paint, nearly causing me a headache. I scanned around the barn, looking for any sign of my rescuers. I was met with a high pitched Moo and a buck to the face, and for the first time in ages, I felt my own blood. Copious amounts of it, pouring from my nostrils in large crimson falls, cascading across my body. My...shirtless...body...

“AHH!” I yelled, both at the fact of me being half naked, and from the fact that I was providing enough blood for a second coat on the beams.

Clutching my nose, I scrambled away from my attacker, ready to fight back with everything that I had, only to realize that my attacker was a particularly startled cow, who was backed into the corner opposite me.

“Oh, it's just a cow.” I said, remembering something about the show.

“So, what's your name?” I asked it, expecting it to talk back like in the show.

I got up, or I would have if the throbbing in my head hadn’t forced me back to my knees. I hung my head, my hands moving from my nose to my temples, as I clutched my head in my hands, squeezing as hard as I could without crushing my skull.

“ARG!” I grunted as the pain welled up in my head, my stomach threatening to empty itself all over the hay covered floor.

My vision became blurry. I could hear a constant buzz in my ears, I prepared for myself to fall over, passed out. But I didn’t. Suddenly the pain subsided and was replaced with a feeling of dread as I watched a creature appear in front of me. It looked like me, if I was an anthro. It had the same blonde hair, the same tan skin, the same smile. It's eyes...were pure evil. Black pits, with no irises. It's smile turned from a normal smile to an unnatural grin, making the light suddenly seep from the world. I felt encased in a tomb of solid darkness, hatred filling every pore of my body, nearly making me froth at the mouth with the thirst for blood.

“I-its...y-you...” Was all I could muster before a different feeling flooded over me.

This was a feeling I was stranger to. It was a warm feeling, one that made me want to take comfort in...anything. Even the creature in front of me that used to be my reflection. I looked up, and noticed a change in the face of my old reflection. The evil that was once present in his eyes, was replaced with a look of sadness and despair. The blackness that filled them replaced by a depressed look. His bright blue eyes, matching my own, his outlandish grin replaced with a frown. The look was easy to read, it was one I recognized all too well, it was one I wore every time I added to the maze of white tissue upon my wrists, one of defeat.

The sudden change in emotion made my head spin. I watched my reflection sit next to me and sigh.

“I’m done. I can’t do it anymore. I give up.” He said, each word he said made the jackhammer in my head become more merciful.

“Good, cause I was getting annoyed.” I said with more confidence than I felt.

“Hehe, just because I’m not in your head anymore, doesn’t mean that I don’t know what you're really feeling.” He replied.

“Why are you an anthro?” I asked out of nowhere.

“Because you are.” He replied flatly.

Looking at my body, I realized something I hadn’t before, I was in fact an anthro. Tail the same dirty blonde color as my mane. My legs inverse like in the show, my body was a little more built than it was on Earth, my abs were clearly visible with my pecks being pronounced. I looked at my wrists, seeing the familiar white streaks, I sighed, knowing that I would be questioned about them. That drew my attention to my surroundings. I stood and hopped out of the pen I was currently in.

“Why would they put me in a pen? I would have thought that they would have put me in their house, like in a guest bed or something.” I asked myself.

“Well I have no idea. I was KOed when you hit that branch.” My reflection replied.

“Oh right, that sucked. It was definitely...surprising.” I said, for some reason I felt more at peace when I was talking to myself, or my reflection as the case may be.

“Yeah...for some reason I feel more relaxed and more willing to open up when we talk.” He said, as if he read my mind.

“Hmm...maybe it's because we are technically talking to ourselves.” I offered.

“Yeah thats probably it.” He replied.

We were interrupted by a small squeal from across the barn. We looked to see none other than Applebloom, in her trademark pink bow, short jean shorts and tied plaid shirt that showed her toned stomach, standing wide eyed at the sight before her. She dropped the bucket she was holding and ran off screaming about naked intruders in the barn.

“Oh-”

“-shit” We said.

“Quick where are my clothes!” I asked frantically.

“Where are your clothes? Where are my clothes!” He yelled as we both searched every inch of the barn.

“No they are my clothes! I was in control of our body! You didn’t even have to wear clothes until five minutes ago!”

“Oh shut up and find them!” He retorted.

Eventually we found two pairs of jeans and two white wife-beaters. We threw them on, the jeans were dusty and the wife-beaters were torn but beggars can’t be choosers, and sprinted out the double doors to the barn. After easily outrunning a old green mare, no doubt Granny Smith, and a big red stallion with a two-by-four in hand, Big Macintosh, we made it to a tree house out in the middle of nowhere.

“Well...I guess we should go in...” Said my twin.

“Uh yeah thats a good idea.” I said, sarcasm dripping from my words.

“Right, right...we did just kinda scar her for life didn’t we...”

“No duh! But that raises the question, if they had no idea that we were there, who put us there?” I asked.

“Hey yeah. Who could have done that? Wait, I didn’t see Applejack chasing us, maybe she put us there.” He replied.

“Yeah I guess that could have happened...yeah actually, that's probably what happened.” I agreed.

“By the way, I never told you my name, probably due to the fact that I was too busy tormenting you all the time.” Said my double.

“Uh I just assumed that we had the same name.” I said flatly.

“Oh well then I guess you do know my name. Hey we should come up with new names! Seeing as how we are now in Equestria, we should make up pony names!” He said excitedly.

“Um yeah I guess we could, then we will have to find a job, a house, and make friends with the main characters in the show...”

The two of us continued to discuss how to begin our life in this new land, we entered the shelter and, unsurprised to find that it was the Cutie Mark Crusaders’ secret hideout, we made it our home for the night. Before I fell asleep, I watched as my alter ego slept, waiting for him to wake up and kill me. After watching him sleep for a couple hours, I tried to sleep myself, only to find that I couldn’t. I decided to take a short walk, scout out where we actually were.

I walked to a pond and lay down. Looking to the sky, I thought. I thought intensely about anything that came to mind. Anything from my cutie mark, which was the white yang half of the yin and yang duo and I assumed that my twin had the yin half, to why my twin was all of a sudden so friendly. I decided to blame it on the copious amounts of friendship in Equestria.

It must have affected me when I came here, I thought, I mean the magic here is powered by friendship right? And it must have taken a ton of magic to bring me over, but that still doesn’t explain why we separated and it doesn’t explain how he got his body...so many questions...

I ignored the bombardment of questions to allow sleep to slowly grasp me in it's unrelenting claws as I got back to our outpost. I lay down and fell gracefully into a daze, until I realized something, why was I going to bed in the middle of the afternoon? I shot awake and ran to the nearest window, hitting the rafters of the creaky wooden house, and looked out to an unpleasing sight. It wasn’t even the afternoon yet, the sun was at a higher position than it was earlier that day.

“Oh god. It's morning!?! Why did I have to come to Equestria in the morning!?!” I asked no one in particular.

I had a sudden realization, if it was morning, then the CMC haven’t had their meeting yet. I realized the problem too late, for as I turned around to wake my twin up I heard three distinct voices from outside. I ran to his side and kicked him in the side, perhaps a little too hard.

“OW! What the fuck was that for man!” He yelled at me.

He just as soon realized his mistake as I had. Suddenly the trio of voices from outside stopped, I heard quiet hoofsteps to the door, and I heard the wood of the walls creak. I looked over to my twin and we made eye contact. I signed for the both of us to go out the window, he nodded and we approached as quietly as we could. He clambered over the windowsill and hit the ground with a muffled grunt. I was about to copy his movements when the door was thrown open and three teenaged anthros rushed through the door, and in a blur were holding onto my arms and legs.

“Haha! I knew it! You’re a rapist aren’t you, trying to rape us poor little fillies! Well we got you and now we are going to turn you into the police!” Said a orange pegasus with purple a purple mane and tail.

Scootaloo...

“Yeah thats right!” Said a white unicorn with a double toned purple mane and tail.

...Sweetie Bell...

“No wait girls, lets give this guy a chance to explain himself, I ah saw him back at the barn with a friend o’ his, they were both in their underwear so ah thought they was rapists or something, but this seems ta prove that they were jus’ tryin’ ta find a place ta stay.” Said a familiar filly

...and Applebloom, oh my.

I chuckled at my joke, when the three of them looked at me suspiciously, “What's so funny huh?” Asked Scootaloo.

“Oh nothing, just a joke I made earlier,” I replied, “and yes Applebloom, good deductive skills, heck you could probably get your cutie mark for being a detective.”

Applebloom instantly beamed, “Really? Am I that good?” She asked, until she realized what I had said, “Hey, how did you know all that stuff about me?” She asked, eyeing me suspiciously.

“Uhhhhhhhh...”

Shit! I thought, what do I do? I can’t just tell them the truth or they will send me to whatever the anthro version of a mental institution is, and I AM NOT going to one of those!

As I was thinking of a way out of this, my twin came rushing in the front door, “Oh hello brother! Ah was wonderin’ what took ya so long! But ah guess that you jus’ got caught up in ya attempt at a surprise party for the youngun’.” He said with a fake southern accent.

Ugh. This is gonna bite us in the butt later isn’t it... I thought.

“Uh yeah brother, ah was just tryin’ to find out what she liked an ah heard Applejack saying how much mah lil’ cuz liked this here clubhouse.” I said, rustling the filly’s hair.

“Wait what?” Asked Scootaloo.

“We are Applebloom’s cousins. We came here in secret ta try and make a surprise party for the little one, but she found us when we were sleepin’ in the barn, so we had ta find another place ta stay, and we ended up here. And the rest is history.” My twin replied.

Yeah just keep digging us deeper in this shit-hole we are in why don’t ya. I thought angerily.

As if I said it out loud he said, “Aw come off it brother, it's not like we were goin’ ta keep this a surprise anymore.”

“YOUR MAH COUSINS!?!” Yelled a giddy Applebloom, before she rushed up to us and brought us into a big, bone crushing embrace.

“Gak! Uh yeah...now uh...can ya let go?” I asked her, feeling my ribs nearly give way under the pressure.

“Oh yeah sorry...but ah have so many questions!” She said, releasing us while we gasped for breath.

“Well shoot kiddo! We got all day, seein’ as how the party got cancelled.” He said, with way more confidence than I felt.

Jeez! I must have lost my edge, he is besting me at acting! I mean I know he is me, but that means that we are supposed to be the same at it right?

“Alright well first off, where are you from? Ah haven’t seen you round these parts before.” Asked the filly.

“Well, we don’t really have a home, we became bankrupt and had to sell our farm, we have been travelling ever since.” He said.

Wait, how did she accept our explanation so fast? We didn’t even have to explain why Granny Smith and Big Mac were chasing us out of the farm...eh gullible kids I guess.

“Really thats awful!” Said Sweetie Bell, as the three of them circled around my unfortunate ‘brother’.

“Yeah, where have you been living? I mean recently?” Scootaloo joined in.

“Well...” I saw him scratch his chin in thought, “I don’t know if I should tell you...seeing as how you're so young and all...”

“Awww come on. PLEASE?” The three fillies said in unison.

Wow...they must have practiced those puppy dog eyes...they are very persuasive.

“Well...ok fine,” He finally answered, “we have been living in...pause for dramatic effect...THE EVERFREE FOREST!!”

And cue the piano... BUM BUM BUUUM.

The three fillies gasped at the stallion’s response, “W-what are you two doing living in a place like that!?!” Asked Sweetie Bell.

“Yeah it's really dangerous!” Exclaimed Scootaloo.

“Not ta mention scary!” Applebloom chimed in.

“Well let me tell ya!” He said as he told them a story of action and adventure and hunting, this probably frightened them the most until I came up with a good excuse as to why we would commit such a heinous crime.

All the while I’m sitting there thinking, We are gonna get our asses handed to us on a silver platter. Unless I get to Celestia...hmmm...

I sat there, coming up with a plan to get to the princess, all the while, my twin was constantly telling our totally fake life story, fake exaggerations included, to three very intrigued fillies.