HOLY FUCK!

Today was the day! Today was the day of Pinkie Pie's ultra super amazing high definition party!!! The waiting list was ten feet long as people called weeks in advance to try Pinkie's new party amplifier. 5 ponies, however, did not have to call in advance for a place in the party. They were, of course, the other elements of harmony. Our protagonist, Twilight Sparkle, was getting ready at this moment, dressing in her trashiest outfit possible. She was ready for some secks.

Twilight looked at herself in the mirror adorning her wall, "Dayum, girl! I'm looking fine tonite. Big Mac not gon be able to resist this bitch."

Her assistant Spike rolled his eyes before saying, "Why don't you be yourself instead of acting like a whore for him Twilight?"

Twily turned her head slowly towards Spike and picked him up saying, "Men don't want you to be yourself Spike, they want you to be trashy as hell so they can get laid. Then they impregnate you and they HAVE to marry you. At least that's what the princess said."

Then she opened her mouth and ate Spike, then used her magic to make herself skinny again. This was Spike's punishment, you see, whenever he pissed her off, she ate him. It was better not to ask about it.

Twilight was now ready to go to the party. She opened the door and strutted out, closing the door with her magicks. She strutted down the dirt road, getting fox whistles from all the boys. Then she finally arrived at sugar cube corner. She walked right past the bouncer and into the cake shop, looking for pinkie. She finally found her, literally bouncing off of walls, her face covered in a white powder. Twilight grabbed Pinkie with her magic and brought her forth.

"Pinkie! How you doin' hooker?"

"Just dandy twily wily hily smiley!!!!!!!!!!!" She exulted in a loud and annoying manner. This was not her usual manner of annoying, which you and I find absotively adorable. No. This was hopped up on so much drugs that you can talk as fast as superman can fly annoying.

"So where's your special party enhancer Pinkie? I've been dying to try it," Twilight said in her best hooker voice.

"Oh pshawd Twi, I've got something better for you. Follow MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! The others are already waiting for you."

Twilight followed Pinkie upstairs and into Pinkie's room. Rarity, Rainbow, Flutters, and Applejack were already there. They all had red eyes and seemed really jumpy to Twilight. Rarity's eye was twitching and Rainbow was flying circles around the room and her drool was everywhere. Fluttershy was humping her Angel Bunny and Applejack was drinking her famous apple cider.

Rarity was the first to notice Twi and Pinkie, "Oh hello darling. How are you? You simply must try it," suddenly Rarity started to spasm on the floor.

"Is she okay?" Twi asked.

"She's okay, that happens to her every 20 minutes or so. Now lets get you party ready!"

Pinkie poured out a bag of white powder in front of Twilight and started to separate it with a razor. Then she jumped up and grabbed two full needles and a rolled up piece of paper, it's diameter was about the size of your thumb. She tied leather straps onto both of Twilight's arms and then kept pulling things out of her ass. They included an collection of mushrooms, bottles, and a shit load of pills.

"OK! First snort the powder then inject both shots into your arms, then smoke the joint. Those ones are necessary. Then you can try the booze, or the mushrooms, and maybe pop a few pills.

Twilight, the ever dutiful and diligent pony, did all Pinkie commanded. This was Pinkie we're talking about here. What could possibly go wrong?

"Okay Twi, now just sit back and relaaaaaaaaxxxxxxxxxxxxx........" Pinkie said, her voice getting deeper, then... BLACKNESS WAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Twilight woke up suddenly, she had been asleep for an hour, but of course she didn't know that. You and I know that. She's not a fucking clock, she's barely contained magic in a pony body. Shit's bout to go down.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH," Twilight screamed up and ran out of the room, tears running from her face and her eyes as red as the explosions erupting from the surface of a dying sun.

While running down the stairs, bleeding tears and crying blood, she ran into Big Mac. Obviously (Cause i fucking said so) This was the handsome stallion she had wanted to fuck. So she did. Right there on the stairs in front of everybody, she raped him, but he liked it so it's not really rape. All the ponies were cheering her on as she went so she O-FACED and shot Mac into a wall. He broke three ribs, but got up and kept partying.

In Twilight's drug induced haze she saw the world as it really was. If she looked right she saw rainbows and kittens and poptarts. If she looked left she the same exact thing, EXCEPT MORE OF IT! Then a bowl of candy popped into her field of vision. She karate chopped that motherfucker in half a second and it flew into the air. Then she jumped up and ate all of them in slow motion. These were not the butterscotches she thought they were though. No, theses were high power pain killers.

Twilight had about 15 minutes before the pain killers hit her and she secksed every single stallion in that joint. Then she collapsed.

[SPACE FOR TIME LAPSE OF 2 DAYS AND 17 HOURS]

Twilight woke up, her eyelids were heavy and she felt like she got hit in the head with a sledgehammer repeatedly till her brains fell out and then somebody shoved skittles into it and put it back in. She slowly sat up. Nobody was in the hospital room except for her and the pony in the adjacent bed, guarded by the awesome might of the curtain of cheap fabric. She ripped the curtain back and saw.........

Princess Celestia!

"Princess? What are you doing here?" Twilight practically screamed.

"That was a hell of a rager huh Twilight," her teacher said with a turn of her head and a creepy smile.

"Uh, yeah, i guess so. I don't really remember it though."

"Well let me inform you. You went upstairs with Pinkie to do drugs and came back down an hour later, sexxed Big Mac, swallowed a bowl of Painkillers, Sexxed every stallion in the building and then collapsed. All in under 15 minutes," Celestia reached a hoof over and patted Twilight on the back, "I'm very proud of you Twilight. And there's more good news! The doctors tested the shit out of you and your STD FREE!!!!!"

Then Twilight and Celestia jumped out of their beds and brohoofed before having violent secks on the hospital floor.

THE END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Once again done without preread, spell-check, thought, or a premise. This seriously just popped into my head and i started writing, It took me less than 20 minutes.