Catch You On The Moonside

by Dunsparce

Rating: teen
Tags: Dark, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Adventure, Twilight Sparkle, Random, Crossover
Length: 3996

Where yes is no and no is yes.

Luna has gone missing and a dark power is rising, or at least according to Celestia. Desperate to put the evil to rest, but unable to remove herself from her work, she sends Twilight to where she believes the source is: a restaurant in the middle of Canterlot. Twilight thinks that it will be no problem... until she lands in a crazy place where yes is no and no is yes and is trapped.
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Earthbound crossover - that means it's trippy as all hell, kids. Also, do not read if you have a fear of the Boogey Tent.

Published 2013-08-04 02:30:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-08-04 02:30:02 UTC

Red, Green, Yellow, Yellow, Red, Blue, Apple Sauce

Nothing really seemed out of the ordinary about the restaurant; it was lively with ponies and everypony was doing their job as the waiters and waitresses. Twilight really didn't expect things to be so normal, for Celestia's instructions seemed very ominous. Twilight reviewed her orders as she stood just inside the entrance.

"Let's see... show them this signature and check out the basement. Easy enough." Twilight reviewed aloud. She looked left and right, and eventually caught one of the waitress's attention.

"Excuse me, ma'am?"

"Oh, hello, how may I help you?" the waitress asked with a friendly grin.

"There's no trouble, but may I see the manager of this establishment? There is a concern from Celestia about this restaurant."

The waitress's face suddenly began to show worry and fear as she stuttered on her next sentence and nearly dropped her plate. Twilight simply assumed that she was stunned to hear about the Princess's concern and let her talk.

"Oh, umm... sorry, I just... erm.... are... are you sure you need to see our manager? Sorry, it's just that this has happened before and... things didn't turn out well... umm..."

Twilight shook her head. "Sorry, under the orders of the Princess, I have been sent to make sure nothing is amiss here."

"Well... okay... but I warned you. This could end up bad. REAL bad! Follow me, if you please." The waitress said as she put her dishes and tray on a nearby table. Twilight took note that when she was guiding her to the manager's office, her legs were shaking, as if she was afraid of something dangerous. She stopped in front of a door and knocked on it, but hesitated a few seconds before she did so.

"Come in." A low voice answered from the other side. As the waitress opened the door, Twilight firstly noticed one thing: one heck of a mustache. It was large and black, and fit the stallion that sat at the desk reading a paper.

"M-M-Mister Monotoli?" the waitress asked.

"Yes, Vinyl, what today?" Mr. Monotoli asked with a drawn out and annoyed voice.

"We have another pony that w-w-would like to see you. Says she has orders from Princess Celestia." Vinyl said.

Monotoli slammed the paper on his desk and glared into Vinyl's eyes.

"Well, what are you just standing there for, ya twit? Let her in for God's sake!"

Vinyl opened the door, allowing Twilight to walk in casually. Monotoli squinted at her.

"Hey, you're that one pony that Celestia drools over a picture of at night... Twilight Sparkle, ain't it?" He spit rudely.

What a charmer. Twilight thought. "Um, yes. Under orders of Equestria's Princess..." She said as she laid the paper with the signature on the desk, "I would like to--"

"Check out our basement, yeah, yeah. Can't do that, sweetheart." Monotoli said as Vinyl slipped out of the room unnoticed.

"Excuse me?" Twilight said, dumbfounded he refused orders from the princess. "I have orders from CELESTIA, sir! She said to go to any extreme to get any information. Luna has gone missing, and she was last seen HERE! I demand you let me see your basement."

"Mmmm... nope. Sawwy. Go home please." Monotoli said sarcastically. At this point, Twilight had had enough.

"Monotoli, if you don't let me see what you are obviously hiding, I'm going to have to get a guard to place you under arrest for defying orders from your Princess." She threatened the stubborn stallion. His eyes suddenly widened largely.

"Woah! Chill out, lady! Don't get your tail stuck up your butt! Jeez, I hide it for a reason, you know? It's dangerous!" Monotoli said loudly.

"Listen, our Princess of the Night might be in trouble because of it and I need to prevent it spreading to other places! Let me see it, please!" Twilight demanded.

"Fine. Come over here." Monotoli said as he moved his chair to the wall. As Twilight cautiously walked over to him, she noticed that, on the wall, there was a small peekhole. "Look in there, and all will be revealed to you."

As Twilight peeked through the hole, she noticed one thing in particular: nothing. She looked around the peekhole, but in all directions, she now absolutely nothing of interest.

"Mr. Monotoli, I'm afraid I don't see--"

WHACK!

Suddenly, from behind, a harsh blow hit Twilight's head. Monotoli stood in front of an unconscious Twilight Sparkle with a dark frown and a small, golden humanoid statue tucked between his hooves.

"Let's see how you like THIS, you nosy little agent." He said as he covered Twilight with a sheet and called for the assistant manager.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Twilight finally began to wake up after a few hours, confused and with a monstrous headache. She had no recollection of what happened, only that she was in some sort of restaurant when it happened, whatever it was. The poor mare groaned as bright, colorful lights shined in her newborn ocululi. Everything that wasn't lit up was dark grey or black, and that included some of the ponies in the... restaurant. As Twilight lifted herself up above a desk, she gasped at what she saw: an odd alteration of the restaurant she so vividly remembers.

"Wh... wha?" She barely spit out. "Where...? Where am I?"

She looked around to see if anything was familiar, but nothing seemed as it was before. Twilight began to think that she was dreaming. She lightly hit her head on the counter she woke up behind, and it hurt enough for her to say that what she was witnessing was indeed reality. Suddenly, a certain familiar waitress passed by: the name she remembered as "Vinyl".

"Excuse me... erm... miss... Vinyl?" Twilight asked. The question made Vinyl stop in her tracks. "Oh! Umm... do you mind telling me where I--"

"HELLO, TWILIGHT SPARKLE! HOW ARE YOU!? NO? GOOD!" Vinyl screamed as she flung around with a gigantic smile, stunning Twilight. She was... different than normal, in both action and looks. In fact, everypony looked off. It was as if they were outlined with one of those electric "open" signs that restaurants hang near the door.

"Excuse me? I didn't ask that..." Twilight responded nervously.

"OH DON'T WORRY, I LIKE THAT BAND, TOO!" Vinyl shrieked as she flung herself around once again and walked away.

"Wh-what's going on!?" Twilight asked herself as she put her hooves to her head. But she noticed something as she did, and when she put her hooves down so she could see them, she had that "outline" that the others had. She began to shake, fearful that she would be stuck here.

I've got to get out of here. Twilight thought as she looked left to see a waiter serving a cake with foot long worm surrounding it. I've... I've got to get out of here! She looked right to see a dog and a cat at a table, sitting and eating a deer's leg together. "I've got to get out of here!" She shouted.

She bolted for the door of the restaurant, but she ran right into a hard surface. Looking up, she saw that the door was right next to her and that she had run into a wall painted like the door. Every pony in the restaurant shouted "HAHA!" once in unison and then continued with their conversation as though nothing happened. Twilight was now shaking in terror. She was a lost soul in the twisting nether, eagerly trying to find her way out, though it felt hopeless. She hadn't even seen what has happened to the outside, but she sure didn't want to.

When she exited the actual door, she nearly fainted at what the outside greeted her with. Everything was black and outlined; from the bouncing fire hydrant with eyes to the individual blades of grass. The sky was pitch black and there was no sun and no stars, only a broken full moon.

"Well, hello, Twilight Sparkle! How might you be this fine day?" A voice asked. Twilight looked around, but nopony was there.

"Who... Who's there!? Show yourself!" Twilight shouted, breathing heavily.

"What do you mean 'who's there'? Don't you see me? I'm right... here!" the voice said as Twilight felt something swing around her neck, making her flinch in terror.

"I don't see anypony!" She shouted.

"Oh, I see, you've never been here before, have you? My name's Trixie Lulamoon." Trixie said.

"T-Trixie!? Like, the great and powerful Trixie?"

"What? I don't know what you mean, Twilight. Must be something in that wretched land known as Equestria." Trixie muttered.

"I'm... not in Equestria? What is this this place then?"

"You're in Moonside!" Trixie exclaimed.

"I'm... where? Moonside?"

"Home sweet home, baby! It's the opposite of Canterlot. Here, 'yes' means 'no' and 'no' means 'yes'! Everything makes sense here!"

"What about 'maybe'?" Twilight asked.

"Well, maybe can go dump its head in a trash heap!"

Twilight looked around, squinting her eyes. "What... what are those sounds I keep hearing?"

"You mean the music? Lovely, is it not?" Trixie asked as she sighed heavenly.

"What? That's music? It's just... random electronic noises!" Twilight adamantly responded.

"IT'S MUSIC, SWINE!" Trixie roared as a gust of wind nearly knocked Twilight on the ground.

"Sorry! It's just all new to me! Hey, I'm looking for Princess Luna, has she been here lately?" Twilight asked.

There was no response from Trixie, wherever she was.

"Hello? Trixie?"

Still no response. Twilight began to shake again. A gas pump on the other side of the street was... dancing and making noise. It also appeared to have eyes. Twilight, being her normal self, felt the need to look both ways, cross the street, and check it out. As she approached it, it stopped moving and it closed its eyes.

"Ummm... are you... alive?" Twilight nervously asked. No response came from the gas pump. She edged closer to it.

"Hello?" She asked.

"...Tick.....tock....tick.... tock..." The gas pump quietly muttered.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" Twilight asked.

"....3...."

"...I'm so sorry, but I cannot hear you."

"....2...."

"Ummm... please, PLEASE speak up? I would only like to chat with you!"

"....1...."

Twilight couldn't take it anymore. "Speak up already!" She shouted. A clunking sound suddenly came from below Twilight, and when she looked down, she saw that the number where the gallons display on the pump read "666". She gasped and looked up at the gas pump, who's eyes were wide open and angry.

"Have fun in Hell, slimehead!" It shouted. Twilight screamed as she ran a few feet backwards and dove, covering her eyes in terror. A few seconds later, a explosion ravaged Twilight's ears and her backside felt immense heat. She was sure that she was burned to some degree. When she gained the courage to look backward, the gas pump laid where it had before, eyes closed and and still. Twilight saw her chance and bolted from the scene, her rear back hurting from the burn. She found a nearby building and hit in the alley.

"What is this insane place!?" Twilight said loudly, trying to catch her breath.

"Why, this is Moonside!" A voice behind her said. She span around only to see a floating pair of eyes with no body staring directly at her.

"GAH!" She screamed as she exploded out of the alley. She kept running and running throughout the city until she could run no more. She stopped to rest before she fainted out of exhaustion.

"I wonder if anypony knows how to get out of here..." Twilight muttered to herself.

"Get out of here? Why do that?" A voice said from beside her. It was a voice too familiar for her to not recognize: Princess Cadance. She looked left, and there was no mistake, Princess Cadance was approaching her.

"Cadance!? What are you doing here!?"

"I live here! It's wonderful! Everything makes sense, isn't that right, Lauren?" Cadance said as she looked down to her right side.

"...Lauren?"

"Oh yes, my pet puppy! Say hi, Lauren!" Cadance encouraged Lauren. There was nothing by her side. "Aww, she says she likes you, Twilight!"

Twilight did her best to avoid another Trixie situation. "Right. Hi, Lauren. Anyways, Cadance, is there any way to get out of... Moonside? I need to get back to Equestria, there's an evil that needs to be stopped there and I'm the one the Princess is counting on!"

"Evil? What is 'evil'? Is that a type of drink?" Cadance asked.

"What!? No! Are you okay, Cadance? You seem... off." Twilight said as she tilted her head and squinted.

"Really? I was about to say the same to you. We follow The Moonshaper's words and her words only. You aren't really on the same road as we are."

"The... Moonshaper?"

"The creator of this place? She's magical. She uses her golden statue to ensure us of full happiness!" Cadance cheerily said with a bright smile.

"Where can I find her? I need to get out of here." Twilight hastily asked.

"Well, the Carnival of Moonside is in town for the next millennium, and she LOVES the carnival! Why not check there? It's just down the street half a mile."

"Thanks Cadance. See you." Twilight said as she turned to leave.

"Alright, then. Come on, Lauren, let's go tie Twilight's parents down in their house and then burn it down when they're inside." Cadance said.

Twilight's heart jumped a beat and she flinched her head backward. Cadance was gone.

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The carnival wasn't any more strange than the rest of the bloody town, with ponies dancing with lit bombs and chewing on dog bones. As Twilight walked further and further into the creepy carnival, a voice jumped her from behind.

"Hiya, Twilight! What are you doing here?"

"...Pinkie?" Twilight asked as a pink mare bounced up and down toward her. "Well, at least you seem normal."

"Want some broccoli?" Pinkie asked.

"...Neeeeeever mind." Twilight sighed. "Anyways, have you seen 'The Moonshaper' around here?" Twilight asked. Pinkie suddenly got on her knees and began to bow.

"WORSHIP THE MOOOOOOONSHAPER." She began to repeat. Soon, other ponies around her began to bow and repeat the same. Twilight lifted an eyebrow and began to become worried again.

"Umm... Pinkie, do you know where she is?" Twilight asked again.

"She's everywhere. She's everyone. She is the MOOOOOOOOOONSHAPER! She's you, she's me! She's... she's...!" Pinkie started to shake violently and with wide eyes.

"Pinkie!? Are you--"

Pinkie then exploded, knocking Twilight on her back, precisely where her burn was. When she opened her eyes Pinkie was gone and everypony was walking toward a strange, purple tent.

"Augh... I just want to get out of here..." Twilight murmured yet again as she made her way toward the tent. Every festivity had stopped completely and now Moonside was completely silent other than the Moonside Swing that played over and over in the distance, wherever the distance was.

The exhausted, tired, and filthy with dirt mare made her way to the purple tent, only guessing what could possibly be inside. However, as she approached the tent, it shut its curtains on her. Try as she did, Twilight found it impossible to even budge the curtains. It was as though they were made of metal.

"C'mon you son of a gun, OPEN!" a frustrated Twilight said as she slammed her hoof against the curtain. As she did that, she heard a fearsome growl and her body paralyzed in fear. Her eyes glanced left and right, but she saw nothing. The growling continued. Soon, a drop of liquid landed on her forehead, making her flinch. Afraid of what she might see, she slowly looked up, shaking like there was an earthquake. She was stunned to see that the tent... had a face.

She gulped.

"Groaaawr! I'm the BOOGEY TENT!" The Boogey Tent roared as it began to shuffle toward Twilight.

"AAAAH!" Twilight wailed as she dashed toward the entrance of the carnival, her eyes shut out of fear. "I don't wanna die! Not here! Not now! Not by that THING!"

Twilight plummeted head-first into something extraordinarily dense. Looking up, she saw that the Boogey Tent had somehow blocked the entrance of the carnival before Twilight reached it. There was no escaping this monstrosity.

"What do you want!? Don't kill me!" Twilight shouted.

"You seem... lossssssst." The Boogey Tent said sinisterly.

"I just want to get out of here. I don't belong here, not with the likes of you! Everypony here is crazy! Cadance told me to come here and find 'The Moonshaper'."

"GWAHAHAAAAAA! You think you can get out of here!? YOU, unfortunately, are correct, madam! Doesn't it feel HORRIBLE to know there's actually a way out!?"

"Wha--!? No! That's exactly what I want!" Twilight responded, confused out of her mind.

"I knew you'd feel terrible! Wanna know how to do it!?" The Boogey Tent asked with a maniacal laugh.

"Well, du--" Before Twilight spoke, she thought back to what Trixie told her about no and yes in Moonside. "No. I don't want to know."

"Oh really? Not the answer I was expecting from you, insider. The Moonshaper uses her Mani Mani Statue as a base for her power. All ya gotta do is use that statue to get back! The Moonshaper guards it and carries it with her, though."

"How do I get around The Moonshaper, though?" Twilight asked the Boogey Tent, who proceeded to giggle at her comment.

"Sweetie, news flash, you DON'T! Hah! You won't even be able to touch her! The scheme is way too far along for you to get back! The Mani Mani statue has given her so much power that she and her Equestrian followers shall spread the joys of Moonside across to that blasted realm! It'll be just like back in the day." The Boogie Tent began chuckling so hard he sounded like he was choking himself.

"So this is the evil that Celestia warned me abo--"

"YOU SAID IT!!" The Boogie Tent roared as it showed fangs at Twilight.

"Eep! Wh-what did I say!?"

"You said the naaaaaaame! The accursed name! The one that is forbidden here! That crackhead alicorn stopped our wonderful spread long ago and damned our leader! Do not say that name!"

"I'm sorry! Don't kill me!" Twilight wimpered softly. The Boogey Tent began to scooch out from in front of the entrance, allowing Twilight to leave.

"Kill you? Me? Naw. Do you see that tower in the middle of the city? WELL, DO YA?" He adamantly asked.

"Yes... errr.... no!" Twilight responded.

"At the base is the Moonshaper with her Mani Mani Statue. Go there and be sent to Hell!" The Boogey Tent ordered. Twilight stood still for a few seconds to process the situation. "... DIDN'T YOU HEAR ME? I SAID GET, YA COCKROACH!"

Twilight shrieked as she bolted out of the entrance and raced away from the wretched tent. When she stopped to catch her breath, she looked back. The Boogey Tent was gone and ponies were enjoying the festivities as they were when Twilight showed up. The filthy mare sighed and continued to head toward the tower that she was directed to by the Boogey Tent.

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Twilight had finally reached the gigantic tower and was edging around the side of it toward the front. With every step, she could feel more and more of the incredible power of the Mani Mani statue beneath her hooves. It was absolutely terrifying. She pressed on, though, and when she hit a corner of the building, she began to hear a familiar voice and an unidentifiable sound coming from around the side. She knew who it was: The Moonshaper, but who was The Moonshaper? She sounded so familiar to her. Twilight took the risk and peeked around the corner, and as soon as she did, her eyes widened and she felt as though her heart stopped. Standing in front of the Mani Mani Statue was none other than Princess Luna.

"Oh, Mani Mani, how doth I love thy power," Luna said as she walked back and forth, giggling, "this time there shall be no mistakes! We will RULE! Moonside shall infest Equestria and make my dreams become reality, just as it was suppose to be one-thousand years ago!"

Twilight backed her head against the wall in fear, for she had just learned so much information. One-thousand years ago was when Luna was banished for evil, and one-thousand years ago she attempted exactly what she was doing again. Twilight peeked around the corner once again, only to be inches away from Luna's face.

"Why, hello there." Luna said casually.

"YAH!" Twilight shouted as she flung backwards.

"I had word an agent entered Moonside, I had not an idea that it would be Celestia's greatest student. Here to disrupt the spreading of Moonside, aret thou? I'm afraid that isn't possible, Twilight." Luna said with an evil smile.

"L-Luna! You're behind all of this? I thought you were in trouble, so I came investigating! Nothing harmful!" Twilight said, panting heavily.

"Have you now?" Luna said as she began to walk back to the Mani Mani Statue. "Come over here, I trust you mean no harm to me, so I shall do no harm to you."

"U-umm... okay..." Twilight nervously said as she walked slowly toward the Mani Mani statue, legs shaking like jelly in the midst of an earthquake.

"This, Twilight, is Mani Mani, the source of Moonside. I used it to make Moonside, and now everypony and everything is happy here. It is truly a wonderful thing. There are no arguments nor are there any disagreements, because everything makes sense here. My followers in Equestria await their prophesy that I taught them to come true. Dost thou really want to stop it? The coming of eternal happiness of all who live in the vast land of Equestria?" Luna asked the shaking mare.

"I...well, I-I--"

"There is no need to be afraid, Twilight. Mani Mani brings happiness to all. Feel calm and answer truly. Lies are frowned upon in Moonside." Luna warned.

"I... I mean, I love being happy, but being sad and angry are things everypony should experience. So, if you w-want me to be brutally honest, I do want to stop it." Twilight responded. She prepared for the worst, but Luna merely nodded.

"I see. No wonder my subjects are upset as of late. You've brought those emotions in with you; terror, anger, sadness. I need to fix this." Luna said calmly.

"Is that... by sending me back home?" Twilight asked.

"...In a way." Luna said. "Thou wants to go home? I shall send thee home."

"...By using this Mani Mani Statue?" Twilight asked as she looked at the looming, golden statue.

"Yes. Are you ready to go home?" Luna asked.

"I have been for a while now."

"Then stare into Mani Mani's eyes and he will take you home. Do not look away." Luna said. Twilight peered into the empty eyes of Mani Mani, and he stared back. His eyes were soul capturing, and Twilight could really feel herself being transported home. Mani Mani suddenly shot red rays out of his eyes and into Twilight's. The mare barely budged an inch. After a few seconds, Twilight blinked a few times and looked over to Luna.

"M-Moonshaper?" She asked.

"Welcome home, Twilight Sparkle."