The Titans' Orb

by Mister Horncastle

Rating: teen
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Profanity, Gore, Violence, Crossover, Dark, Death, Human, Main 6, Drama, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Warcraft, Suicide / Self Harm, Other, Self Insert, Adventure
Length: 162760

Callum's life on Earth is a lowly one, devoid of colour and hope, but his life is soon to change forever, at the arrival of six very unexpected visitors.

Book 1 in the Titans' Orb saga.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

The Titans' Orb is an artefact created by the Holy Titans of Harmony, to protect the world of Equus from interdimensional threats. When a vengeful demigod breaks loose from Tartarus, the Orb is shattered into six pieces and sent to Planet Earth, scattering across the globe. With all of Equus now in terrible danger, Twilight Sparkle and her friends are sent to retrieve the missing pieces at once.

Meanwhile, there lives a boy named Callum, recently fatherless and enduring the torment of an abusive family. He is soon to discover that the fictional characters from his beloved T.V show, are not so fictional.

Alongside his newfound companions, he is to embark upon a great adventure.

To find the Titans' Orb...

TTO Discord Server ⨀ TTO Goodreads ⨀ Chinese Translation (wip) ⨀ The Masochist Edition

Published 2013-08-05 00:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2024-05-30 10:30:25 UTC

Chapter One: My Life

Putting on my jacket, I looked in the mirror; I didn't look half bad, my past four years of boxing had certainly helped me stay in shape. I wasn't quite there yet though, weighing in at twelve and a half stone for a sixteen-year-old was hardly healthy, but I'd always put some of the blame onto my height, broad shoulders, and being big-boned. I zipped up my jacket, which wasn't exactly trendy, but it didn't look awful. I grabbed a tenner from my room, headed downstairs and walked to the front door, not bothering for lunch as I had eaten a large breakfast.

"Where are you going?" A voice barked.

This voice, was that of my mother's; most people would be pleased to hear the voice of their mother, it should make them feel safe and secure.
Well, things were rather different in this household.

"I'm just heading out to the K-Two, I'm going for a swim." I answered, turning to face her.

She stared at me, then snorted.

"Fine, but I'm not taking you."

I shrugged, this was nothing out of the ordinary; heck, I didn't even ask her. When it came to getting from A to B, I usually had to walk, or take the train, and in a year I'd be able to drive, so that was a plus; thinking about it, I should probably have sent off an application form for my provisional licence, it was never too early to get prepared.

"Good thing I didn't ask you then, I'm getting the bus." I replied.

Opening the front door, I stepped out into the driveway; being June in the middle of summer, I was quite relieved to feel the mildly cool English breeze as it greeted me.

"Send me a text to let me know where you are! Be back before six!"

Not turning to face her, I rolled my eyes.

“Yes mum!”

She nagged so much about me going outside, always checking what I do, the old bat didn't even care about my safety, there was just this obsessive interest in what I was actually doing with my time; it seemed like she was paranoid about something, like she was hiding some big secret. I was sixteen for goodness sake, what did she think I got up to? It's not like I was a bloody rent boy or something...

My mother, where do I start? She was a narcissistic, self-centred old woman with a huge drinking problem.
It mostly started when my father left a few years ago, she would still drink and bully me when he was around, but it properly kicked off when he left; he was the only guy in my family whom I respected.
He used to disappear frequently for short periods of time to go gambling, but he would only ever gamble with what he won, he wouldn't do anything to jeopardise our family's finances; at least, that's how it had always been until one occasion...
We never knew why he'd gone and done it, he didn't even have the balls to admit it to us; mum just kicked him out and then told us how he'd lost all the family savings in a game of poker. It was a stupid decision, and it seemed so out of character for him to risk so much, whether he'd learned his lesson or not, we didn't know; we hadn’t heard from him since; my mother took to shouting at me whenever I mentioned him, she'd even hit me on the odd occasion when I had attempted to pry deeper into where he had gone, so I'd learned to stay quiet about the subject.
I also had an older brother, he used to be alright, but now he's almost as bad as mum. Since dad left, he’d been trying to become the 'man of the house', and seemingly downloaded every negative male stereotype there is, and turned them into his personality. Despite his obnoxious persona, he was incredibly intelligent, and learned how to avoid my mum's brutish and controlling behaviour by mimicking her, from drinking alcohol with her, to simply bullying me for her entertainment. He forced himself to drink hard spirits like vodka and rum, in attempt to be what he called a 'hard man', if there was ever a title, or an award for 'Earth's Biggest Dick', he'd be the one to earn it.
I think that if it weren’t for My Little Pony, and my very few friends, I might have followed the same path.
I'd dealt with some shit, the odd suicide attempt, overwhelming depression, constant suicidal thoughts, all while trying to piece together exactly why I was actually bothering to do anything at all. I wasn't a religious person, I didn't think I was 'put' here for a reason; you find your reasons to live life, while living it.
I just hadn't found mine yet, and to be quite frank, my patience was wearing thin.

I needed a purpose.

Honestly, being a brony had helped keep me maintain the motivation to carry on in this pressing life, yeah, that sounds pretty stupid and immature, but it truly had an effect on people, at least, it had an effect on me; it made me appreciate the trivial joys of life, it had helped teach me to put people's differences aside and learn to love people for who they are, (my family made that guideline rather hard to follow).
The show gave me a very small piece of hope, that one day, I'd forge an unbreakable friendship with some people just like in the show, I already had a group of friends, but they weren't exactly true friends that would support me through thick and thin, they were positive acquaintances from school; alas, they were fair-weather friends.
That said, Harry and Annabel weren't such friends, they were genuine people that I wanted to keep in my life, but both of them lived miles away, I wouldn't see them again until I moved out and found somewhere of my own to live. I wasn't living though, I hadn't been living for years, I've been surviving; I clung onto my hope though, maybe I would get there, one day.
It was an ambitious thought for my current situation, I know, but a guy can dream, right?

Crossing the road and walking over to the bus stop, I sat down on the bench and waited; the bus took forever to show up on a Saturday. I looked around with distaste to my surroundings, I lived in a scuzzy little suburban town called Ifield, every house was a cheap built council house, full of slobs who thrived on benefit fraud, half the town was on a job seeker's allowance, well aware they weren't seeking anything but a cheap way to sponge off the country.
My house was one of the only decent houses in a five mile radius, an comfortably medium to large building with Victorian accents in the woodwork, with a generous four acres of land at the back.
Doing my best to accept this was my situation, I began to daydream while I waited.

I thought about how great it would be to live in Equestria, a place where there is no hate or war, only love and harmony, somewhere where no one judged you for who you were; I was more of a closet brony now since everyone in my school had mocked me relentlessly for it, thank god I'd finished my exams and had gotten out of there.
I thought I could tell my best friend Harry about it because I trusted him; it was back when I first 'joined the herd', Season One had just finished airing, and I'd stumbled upon it via YouTube videos, and found myself hooked after just two episodes.
What did Harry do, the moment I told him? He went and told all the other guys and even the bloody teachers! The rumour didn't take long to get into circulation. Callum Horncastle, the freak, the faggot, the little girl trapped inside a boy's body. Every harsh name bronies could receive, I received; how in the world could a fourteen-year-old boy be a paedophile? Seriously, I wasn't even over the age of consent for crying out loud! I was fine with a handful of people knowing that I was a brony, but my whole school? Awkward!
It took a year for it to die down, but even when it stopped being a big deal, I got the looks here and there; those stupid expressions on their faces, looking at me as if I had a turd stuck to my forehead or something.

I sighed, even when attempting to daydream, I was constantly drawn to the dump my life was. Sure, I was sixteen now, with a whole future ahead of me, but what future? How could it possibly have got better from here?
Eventually the bus turned up; I got on and paid the fare with my tenner, receiving a fiver and a few pound coins in change. Sitting down at the far back, I watched the world go by while going back to dreaming about the nice life that I wish I had.

My self-pity was soon forced away as I saw the leisure centre coming towards me, we had arrived.

I got off the bus, thanked the driver as I always did, (can't get much more British than that), and then headed inside; I handed the cashier my fiver and requested to go swimming in the Olympic pool, and then I went off to get changed. I loved swimming, being underwater was one of the only places I felt free, floating around and sinking down, physically instead of mentally for a change. It was one of my favourite activities, alongside boxing.
Whenever I dived to the bottom, it felt like all my struggles stayed at the surface, as though my mental sickness couldn't swim; perhaps that's why it felt like I was always drowning inside?

After an hour or two of swimming lengths in the Olympic pool I decided to get out, get changed and leave; as I was just towelling myself off and getting dressed, I overheard a couple of teenage girls in the cubicle next to me ranting on about an ex-boyfriend or something similar.

“He’s such a dick; seriously, I’d like, so kick his head in.” One said to the other.

“Yeah, I would genuinely stab him, right between the ribs.” The other replied, in an equally hostile tone.

"Why don't you?"

"I wouldn't get away with it, but if I could, I would."

{Oh, what a wonderful world to live in.} I thought to myself.

I mean, sure, I didn't know who the person they were talking about was, or whether he deserved the things I'd just heard or not, but that wasn't the point, it was bigger than that! Everywhere I went, people were fighting, everyone was so willing to pull one another apart over such pathetic reasons that really didn't matter in the grand scheme of things; I could happily bet my remaining fiver on the fact these girls were gossiping being about some petty broken teenage relationship. So much for Planet Earth's master race; I got changed and left as fast as I could, not wanting to hear any more of it.

The bus that took me home didn't turn up for ages, so I just leaned against the bus stop sign and stared up at the clouds as I waited patiently; I loved doing that, just staring up at the beautiful white clumps in the sky. I used to do it with my dad in the summer; we'd just lay there in the garden, finding shapes in the clouds and seeing what we could make out of them; I would always look for animals, cloud dragons, cloud wolves, cloud cats, you name it. Dad however, would look for people and faces; he always looked for the good in humanity.
I wished my mum had never kicked him out, I missed him a lot; why was it fair that he should disappear from my life after one big mistake, when that monster of a woman would drink, swear, and abuse me constantly? What gave her the right?
There wasn't even a bloody court case for custody over us, the gambling mistake was too abundantly clear for him to be deemed irresponsible, and yet a violent drunkard was?

My frustration withdrew as I was brought back into present day, when I noticed an object moving behind one of the clouds; it was about the size of a large dog, and it was light blue with a flicker of other colours. It was only there for a moment, and then it was gone in the blink of an eye.

"What was that?" I whispered to myself.

After staring at the cloud for some time, I shrugged my shoulders and guessed it was just my imagination. The bus arrived and I payed the fare, using up the last of my money to take me home.
I don't know why I bothered calling it home, sure as hell didn't feel like it.
It was more like prison.

When I finally got back, I found myself alone, my mother must have gone to play late night bingo again, meaning I’d be on my own until about eight o’clock tonight. I boiled the kettle and made myself a Pot-Noodle, along with a cup of tea; I took both items into the lounge, sat on the sofa, and began to eat it in front of the TV.
The Jeremy Kyle show was on, I loved a bit of Jezza, there were few ways to improve your self confidence than to watch other lower class hooligans screaming at one another about who's the father of some baby.

The programme finished and I went to change the channel, as my hand made contact with the remote, there was a loud thud in my garden. One of my dogs, Chilli, started to bark and had zoomed through the cat-flap before I could even stand up; the other dog, called Archer, raised his head, then went back to sleep, that was the best thing about Deerhounds, they do absolutely nothing if they didn't have to. As I headed to the back door I heard a loud cracking noise, and a loud yelp; this was where I began to panic; I opened the door, and sprinted into the garden calling my dog’s name.

“Chilli, where are you? Chilli!”

No response. I was really worried now, I loved Chilli more than anything, she was my baby.

"Chilli!" I whistled, "here Chilli!"

At first there was still no response, but then I heard a whimpering sound in the bushes; I sprinted over to find Chilli shaking with fear, covering her eyes with her paws, her whiskers were singed at the tips, as if set alight by a match or something, I had no idea how it was possible though.
The chickens seemed to be pretty spooked as well, we had ten hens and a cockerel named Bruce; having four acres of land, it seemed stupid not to have any livestock, so they made a nice addition to the garden, it was lovely to have an endless supply of eggs. All eleven of them were clucking loudly and were evidently disturbed by something.
I took Chilli inside and checked her over once more, and gave her the two leftover sausages from last night’s dinner, (mum was going to kill me), and then gave her some attention until she calmed down; I then decided to go back outside to investigate.

After a good ten minutes of snooping around, I found nothing that suggested that there was anyone in the garden; I had searched all four acres. I looked up at the sky to find that it was getting dark; I looked at my watch, nine o'clock already.
That's when I got the strange feeling that I was being watched; I looked around, I didn't see anything in the low light, but it still felt like someone, or something, was watching me. It was the weirdest sensation, I hated uncertainty.
I quickly went back inside and played on my Xbox, trying to forget about the whole thing, I let Chilli come into my room as well for some company.

Later on, I heard the front door slam; my mum was home. Withing seconds I could hear her storming upstairs, the door opened aggressively as she came into my room.

“Why the fuck is the dog on the bed?” She demanded.

She grabbed Chilli by the collar and pulled her off the bed, and then kicked her out of my room, literally; Chilli yelped and ran downstairs, frightened and confused.

“Mum don’t kick Chilli! She hasn't done anything wro-”

I was interrupted by her hand, as it slapped me across the face.

“Don’t answer back, cocky little boy.” She snapped, and then left the room.

I didn’t cry as one might expect, for I was use to this kind of abuse, it had become the norm; frustration is what I felt, the anger inside had been building for years but I could never bring myself to retaliate, it was the main reason I'd started boxing, I needed some way of venting it all.

“Who took the sausage from last night?”

I physically felt the vibration through my bed frame as her voice rippled throughout the damn house. I swallowed, and one word ran through my head.

{Help.}

I miserably walked downstairs to confess; I wished Applejack’s honesty didn’t have such an influence on me for once.

“It was me, mum. Something really scared Chilli outside earlier, so I gave her the sausages to calm her down; she was really scared, honest.”

She looked at me with disgust, and she slammed the fridge door shut.

“Well that’s a load of bullshit, isn't it? I was going to eat that! What, you just thought you could sneak into the fridge while nobody's home and eat them for yourself? You greedy little runt!"

I shook my head in denial and she approached me, smacked me once again, harder than before.

"You're a liar, Callum, now go and make yourself useful and put the chickens to bed!”

I walked out the back door, it slammed behind me and then I hear the lock click.

“Perfect, locked me out...” I mumbled to myself as I headed down the garden.

I went over to the large coop in the corner of the garden, about an acre away from the house. I closed the door of the hutch to make sure the foxes didn't get them; I've had to do this every night for the past two years. I didn't even want the damn chickens, yet they had become mostly my responsibility, if they had no food, it was my fault, if they hadn't been cleaned out, it was my fault, and if they were killed by foxes, new flash, it was my fault.

I was about to head back when I heard a faint voice from behind the shed further, just a little further up the land; instantly on high alert, I clenched my fists and crept towards the shed to investigate. Upon reaching the shed, I crouched down near the large door and listened carefully.

“The poor guy, how can you treat another of your kind like that?”

The voice was female, and I recognised from somewhere; I carried on listening, and I heard another voice speak, to which I also recognised.

“I know, no one should treat one another like that.”

A third voice spoke.

“Twilight, was it really necessary to zap that cute little dog, I feel so bad for the poor thing.”

Twilight... Twilight... That voice, saying that particular name...
It couldn't be, surely? Surely not...

“Unfortunately it was Fluttershy, if it kept barking at us the human might have found us.”

{Oh, my, god}, I thought to myself.

I realised who I was listening to, I couldn’t believe my ears, I must have been dreaming surely, I keep listening to confirm what I was thinking, shaking my head in disbelief.

{How is this possible? How is this possible?} I thought over and over again.

“Twilight, how long are we going to be out here monitoring this dude? We’ve been sat here here for two weeks already! I’m bored and want to get this show on the road!”

“Keep it down Dashie, we’re on another world in a different dimension, we can’t take any chances. I want to learn about these humans as much as I can before I interact with them.”

{They’ve been here for two whole weeks?} I thought to myself in shock.

I was listening to the ‘mane six’, the actual six ponies from the show; it was Twilight Sparkle that singed Chilli’s whiskers, that’s what spooked the chickens, and that’s why I got that feeling of being watched earlier.
I almost dropped dead from pure amazement; how could six cartoon ponies be talking behind my garden shed? It didn’t make any sense, I started to feel nauseous alongside the mixture of confusion and joy.
But then came the fear; what if I had lost my mind? Was any of this even real?
I definitely hadn’t taken any drugs, other than my antidepressants, which certainly had no hallucinogenic side effects. Perhaps I really had gone mad, possibly driven insane by the desire to go to Equestria maybe? I was in a rather rough spot in terms of my mental health as it was, suffering from depression from age nine, I wasn’t exactly the happiest person in the world, to say the least.
Maybe this was some sort of elaborate daydream to take my mind of my emotions? I pinched myself over and over to make sure I wasn’t just dreaming, I wasn’t waking up, I wasn’t having a dream; this was real...

“Dimensions, worlds, aliens, this is all whizzing over my head Twi. I know you’re worried and all. But Princess Celestia sent us to this area specifically, she said there is a human here who knows us, he can help us.”

{Celestia sent them here because of ME?} I thought to myself, almost screaming it out loud.

How could she have known me? Had she been spying on me?
This was too much to handle, I couldn’t stay still for much longer, the urge to actually see them in front of me was so strong that I was actually shaking.

“I know Applejack, that’s exactly why we’re monitoring him from a distance with magic. I want to learn about him in great detail first, I haven’t forgotten what Celestia told me when she gave us the mission, I want to be cautious.”

“Then why, are we not talking to him now? We could learn a whole lot more about him by talking to him in person, definitely faster than how we're learning right now.” Rainbow Dash's voice interrupted.

I was shaking all over; I couldn’t believe that this was actually happening to me, I was desperate to jump out and say something, but I had to keep myself from doing so, I needed more information.

“Because Dashie-”

“Because nothing Twilight, you’re so scared of new things! Come on, we’ve saved Equestria countless times from danger, Nightmare Moon, Queen Chrysalis, Discord, and remember when you lifted that Ursa Minor out of Ponyville? We're badasses, there is nothing we can’t overcome.”

I shuddered, if only they knew what this world held...
Guns, war, murder, thugs, terrorists, rapists, oh, the list was endless; it would take me days to list everything our race was capable of, thankfully they wouldn't find anything like that here in my garden.
Twilight sighed, and gave in to the pressure of her friends.

“I guess you’re right, it’s just that... Oh, fine. We’ll find a way of getting him out here alone and talk to him.”

I couldn’t take it anymore; I came out from around the shed to face them, to face a dream in reality.

“There’s no need Twilight, I’m already out here.”

They... They were real...
I didn't know how to describe this moment, I was looking at something impossible.
The sun hadn't set yet, but it was getting quite low, most of the garden was blanketed in a dark orange light, and I could only just see them all clearly as dusk settled in.
They looked like... Well... Well, I couldn't quite describe it, they were just so real, and yet they were just like from the show; Rainbow's mane and tail were the same vivid bright pastel colours, Pinkie Pie was indeed, bright pink, and Rarity's mane was curled in its usual fashion.
Come to think of it, they looked similar to the animated ponies in Source Filmmaker, just more, well, real.
That was the only way I could describe it, they looked REAL.

All the ponies gasped and stared at me with shock, all of them had their mouths open as wide as physically possible; they said nothing, and I noticed that they were all slowly backing away, I had to speak quickly before they ran away.

“Please don’t be afraid, I’m not going to hurt you.”

Twilight was the first to speak.

“Um... How... how much of that did... Did you hear?”

Her pupils had shrunk in size, just as they did in the show whenever ponies were afraid. I glanced at the others, whom all had the same expression, except for Rainbow Dash, she seemed quite calm after getting over the initial fright.

“I didn’t hear much, only something to do with learning more about me.” I said quickly but calmly.

Internally, I was on the verge of screaming with joy and running towards them, but I had to stay put; I had to find a way of showing them that I was harmless to them.

“I'm not sure how well you know me, but I promise that I am no threat to you, I Pinkie promise.”

The corners of Pinkie’s lips began to turn up into a little grin. I slowly knelt down to make myself look less threatening, to which the ponies seemed to relax a little bit; Rainbow Dash even took a step forward, calm and confident.

“You see Twilight, what did I tell you? Nothing to be afraid of.”

I couldn’t help ask the question that any brony in my shoes would have asked.

“I probably sound ridiculous asking this, but... Are you real?”

Dashie walked right up to me and held out her hoof, grinning.

“Really real.”

I lifted my arm and prepared to make my first physical contact; I hesitated at first, not wanting this dream to end, but then I reached out and touched her hoof.
It was real, and I couldn’t help bursting out with a huge grin.

{Holy shit, she’s real. This is all real!}

The others relaxed and came forward, convinced I was safe; all except Twilight, who still kept her distance. Rarity was the next to say something, she flicked her mane sideways and smiled at me warmly.

“We've been monitoring you for quite some time, but Twilight’s magic can only gather so much information, please tell us more about yourself, we've all been dying to meet you properly.”

I didn’t really know what to say, it’s not like every day you get prompted to talk about yourself to Rarity! I had to say something though before it became awkward, so I used Spike's handy line from the very first episode of the show.

“Well, what do you want to know?”

As I looked from pony to pony, waiting for a response, I noticed a strange look in Rainbow Dash’s eyes; I didn’t know what she was thinking, but I could clearly tell that she was thinking hard, her whole demeanour had changed, like she was curiously studying me for some reason.
My attention was drawn back to Rarity, as she gave her answer.

“Well, thanks to Twilight’s magic, we know your name is Callum, and that your family name is Horncastle, we've learned that you live with your mother and brother, and that you were educated at a school like in Equestria. We've also come to know you're very athletic, having seen your swimming abilities, and that you participate in a combat sport called boxing; but that's pretty much all we know."

She must have referred to my swimming session earlier today; it must have been Rainbow Dash that I had seen in the clouds, it all made sense now, this was incredible!
Before I could reply, a pink, hyperactive pony popped up right in front of me.

"Ooh, ooh, what kind of food do you eat here? Huh? Huh?"

I shuddered, how could I say meat? I'd rather die than see Fluttershy's reaction to that, I needed a miracle, and to my luck, that miracle came; I heard the back door open, and the dreaded voice boom across the garden.

"Oi Callum! Where are you? I told you to put the chickens away, not go fucking camping!"

I looked at all the ponies, and they all looked at me; they knew that I would have to go, but I had an idea.

"Tomorrow I've got the house to myself, you can come in if you like?"

Twilight opened her mouth, clearly about to refuse, but Pinkie Pie broke out with one of her hyper fits.

"Ooh, yes! YES! I would love to! We would love to! I've always wanted to see an alien's house, what's it like in there? Is it all snugly wuggly with big alien furniture and a massive alien kitchen full of tasty alien food and-"

"Alright Pinkie, simmer down."

Applejack gave her hyperactive friend a playful nudge, then she turned to me.

"We'd love to come in, but is it safe with... Her?"

She pointed towards the house, where my mother had just slammed the door and walked off indoors.

"She's off to play bingo all day, and my brother is at a friend's house, so it's just me; trust me, it's safe. Plus I've got loads of books about humans and stuff for you Twilight, you can learn loads about this planet."

That's what got Twilight's attention, books; lots and lots of book for lots and lots of learning, she couldn't refuse now.

"Oh fine, come out and call us when it's safe. Oh and while you're here, can I cast another monitoring spell on you? The last one was dispelled when your mother smacked you earlier."

The ponies all grimaced as Twilight mentioned my mum hitting me, Dashie came up to me with a sorrowful expression on her face.

"How can she do that to you? How do you take it?"

I looked at her and gave her a reassuring smile to show her that I wasn't in any pain.

"Don't feel bad about it Dashie, it's fine. I've gotten used to it."

"That doesn't make it right though!" Applejack exclaimed.

Twilight closed her eyes, her horn began to glow, and I then felt a warm sensation run over my body, like a weightless blanket, it then sank through my skin and filled me with tiny buzzing sensations, before it eventually faded away.

{Holy shit, real magic!} I thought to myself.

I still found it hard to believe that this was all real, this was insane. Magic, real, sparkly, frazzle dazzle unicorn magic!

"I'd better be getting home before my mother gets even angrier." I said to Twilight.

I started to head back towards the house, when Twilight called to me.

"Are you sure it's safe for us to come to your house tomorrow?"

I rolled my eyes at how worried she was, she was worse than Fluttershy; I turned around and called back, and I even performed the little gesture that came with the saying...

"I cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!"

I turned round again and walked to the house, I didn't need to see their faces to know they were all smiling...

Chapter Two: Unexpected Visitors

The others headed back behind the shed, I heard a slight fizzle and looked back, only to find they were completely gone without a trace, almost as though were never there at all.

{Was that all real? Or was I just talking to myself that whole time?} I thought to myself.

There was no sign that they were there, or had ever been there, but, I had felt Rainbow Dash's hoof, and I had felt Twilight's magic, perhaps it was a cloaking spell?

{I'll find out tomorrow.} I thought as I pulled on the back door handle and went into the house.

"And where have you been?" My mother ordered in a stern voice as I closed the door behind me.

By the looks of things, she had been waiting for me the whole time.

"I was putting the chickens to bed, just like you told me to do." I answered sheepishly.

"Then why did you take so long? Took at least twenty minutes."

"I, uh... saw, a fox! A really big fox going for the chickens! Horrid old thing, mangy fur with a thin matted tail, I was just chasing it off." I blatantly lied.

She glared at me, it was like she knew I was lying, but she didn't know how to prove it; she opened her mouth to speak, but clearly had nothing to say, her breath stunk of whisky, Jack Daniels, her favourite.

"Go to bed." She eventually ordered.

"It's only half-past eight."

And once again, I found myself being slapped across the face; it wasn't a hard slap, quite pathetic actually, I swear it was more of an impulsive reaction at this point, like she just subconsciously wanted to lash at out anything that didn't suit her narrative.

"Don't answer back, cocky little boy." She mumbled as she walked off.

She had a really weird obsession with calling me 'boy'; as though it took something away from me, she seemed to enjoy denying me of hearing my own name. I was used to this now, but I still found it hard to think that she can treat her own son like this, the good nature of the ponies had given me a slight reality check; which in retrospect, was rather absurd.
Ponies, literal talking ponies, were giving me a better grasp on reality. Blimey...

{Oh crap,} I thought to myself. {I hope that didn't dispel Twilight's magic.}

I ran to the large glass sliding door which faced the garden, and spoke quietly towards the shed in the distance.

"So, uh, I hope you didn't have to see that. But Twilight, if you can hear me, can you please shine a light or something, to let me know if your spell is still okay?"

After a brief moment of nothing, I was relieved to see a faint amethyst glow at the back of the garden, before disappearing again. I was pretty amazed that the spell had actually worked in the first place.

{Magic...}

The mere thought of the word made me wonder once again if this was real life; how could it not be? I'd physically felt Rainbow Dash's hoof, it felt real enough to me, but how? That was the question that was bouncing around my head, how were they here in my world, and why was I chosen, of all people? There were literally thousands of bronies out there, tens of thousands! What made little old me so special?

{I'm sure Twilight will have all the answers, I'll just ask her tomorrow.} I thought to myself.

I went upstairs and turned on my computer.

{Better watch what I do on this now, I have no idea of what they know about the show, or what Celestia has told them.}

It felt rather strange knowing that the six were currently seeing everything that I was seeing, thank goodness I'd not been watching any porn lately, I'd been feeling so depressed lately that I simply wasn't in the mood for such things.
Thanks mental health, I guess?

After half an hour of playing an old video game called Spore (I saw no harm in playing that if the ponies were watching), I got into bed, switched off the light, and closed my eyes, wondering about what tomorrow would bring, and if it could change my life more than I expected...

I woke up early the next day, to a loud banging noise coming from the room next to me, which was my brother's room, probably one of his insane workout routines. I got out of bed, stretched, and got changed into some clean clothes for once, I didn't want Rarity to have an fit. As I went for the door handle, I noticed the banging in the room next to me had stopped, I opened my door and started to walk out when a hand came out of nowhere without warning and slapped me across the face.

"Rise and shine, dick wad."

My older brother's goofy face came around the corner, plastered with a cheesy grin as though he had won an Olympic medal; I didn't understand why he loved inflicting pain upon me, he found it fun, like a game. Growing up, I'd never have taken him for a sociopath, but alas, he became just that.

"You're up early, quite unlike you with your usually depressed state. Are you going over to a friend's house or something? Oh wait, you don't have any friends!" He teased, clearly amused with himself.

"Actually, you woke me up with all the banging and thumping in your room, what the hell were you doing?" I asked.

"Training, duh. You know I'll be joining the Royal Marines next year, I was practising my moves of course, want to partake?"

He clenched his fists and started to box the air, and then threw a punch that missed my nose by mere millimetres, my obvious reaction was to move my head backwards to avoid it.

"Ha, you flinched!"

He threw an incredibly powerful punch into my gut, causing me to bend over in pain and wheeze, now winded. He did this a lot, in what he called 'testing my measure', an activity where he'd attempt to make me flinch, and punish me if I did; I had somewhat grown accustomed to it, but it still hurt a lot.

"What did I ever do to you?" I said whilst trying to hold back tears.

"You were born, princess." he said in a harsh tone.

He then noticed my eyes watering, and let out an irritated groan.

"Really? You're honestly going to cry now? You're such a pussy, it was just a gut-punch, I thought you were a boxer! Seriously bro, I've seen stalks of corn with better durability, I reckon you'd lose a fight against a fucking summer breeze."

I was going to reply, when he pulled his phone out of his pocket and pretended to talk to someone else over a walkie talkie, and threw on a stupid gravelly American accent as though he were some sort of drill Sargent.

"Hello, Corporal? Yeah I've got Private Pussy right here, I thought I'd advise you to keep him far away from strong winds."

I managed to fight back the tears, I sniffed and then looked him in the eye.

"So, when are you pissing off to your friend's house?" I asked him as calmly as I could.

He rolled his eyes and took a stretch, yawning.

"I'm getting the train in a few minutes, why?"

"Just curious." I replied.

Shrugging, he went back into his room and started playing music from his phone, Lose Yourself by Eminem if I wasn't mistaken; despite my dislike for him, he had a decent taste in music.

I headed downstairs and greeted a very happy-to-see-me Chilli, she stood onto her hind legs and pawed at my shins until I squatted down to give her a cuddle. Archer then decided to follow suit, standing up and lumbering over to me in order to give me a friendly dog-kiss, engulfing the right side of my face with his enormous tongue.

"Hello to you too, big boy." I grumbled playfully.

Scratching the deerhound's neck and giving him a few pats, I got up and went to eat breakfast, I went and poured myself some cereal, I sat down in the dining room and began to eat, when I was sure that my brother was still upstairs, I mumbled out loud.

"You still there Twilight?"

Looking up from the table and out of the glass door, I spotted Pinkie Pie's head quickly pop out from behind the shed, and then vanish behind it again. Needless to say, I was now absolutely beaming, I had never felt this kind of joy in all my life, not even on Christmas morning, yesterday it was like a dream, but now I knew for certain that I was awake.
The mane six were real, and they were in my garden.

"I'll take that as a yes." I said aloud, smirking.

Eating as quickly as I could, I finished my cereal and put my bowl in the dishwasher, I then heard footsteps from above me, and then my brother shouting from the top of the stairs.

"Tally ho!"

An earth shattering thud rippled through the house, my brother had been jumping down the stairs since he was about seven, even though it had been strictly forbidden. Alas, Oliver being Oliver, he quite simply didn't give a shit.
To put it in his own words...
'If you can afford hard-wood floors, you can afford to have someone jump on hard-wood floors.'

"How many times have I told you about jumping down those fucking stairs?" Boomed the voice of my now livid mother.

I then heard her footsteps thud on the floor above, I walked into the hallway and threw my arms up.

"Well done Oliver, now you've gone and pissed her off."

An evil, sly, sickly smile crept up onto his face, as though he had just thought of a really good method on how to creatively kill somebody; he looked at me and opened the front door.

"I know, it was my intent, and now she's all yours. Good luck! Later, fucker!"

He jumped out the doorway, took a little bow, and slammed the door shut. I turned around to see my mother standing a matter of centimetres away from me; I could smell her morning breath, a mixture of whiskey, last night's dinner, and most likely the corpse of her previous victim; I couldn't help but wrinkle my nose.

"What have I told you about jumping down the stairs?"

I nervously took a step back, the noise evidently woke her up, as she was far more pissed off than usual, it didn't take a genius to figure out what was going to happen next.

"It was Oliver, I promise."

"Don't lie to me!" She yelled.

She strode towards me with her arm raised; as her hand came down I instinctively put my arm out to block the impact, she grabbed my wrist and with her other hand she whacked me on the side of the head.

"Get off me you crazy old woman!" I yelled back with my hand against my head.

As I backed away she shoved me with both hands, I fell over and my head smacked against the wall, I cried out in pain and dropped to my knees and covered my face to avoid any further abuse.

"Oh grow up, you're not hurt! You wimpy little boy!" My mother shouted.

She sounded like she couldn't care less, but as I looked up at her from the floor and into in the eyes, I could see a very rare occurrence, remorse, it seemed that she actually felt bad for what she'd done for once; without saying a word she stormed upstairs. I got up, and headed into the kitchen to get an ice pack from the fridge to soothe the throbbing pain on my head.

About five or ten minutes later, my mother came back downstairs dressed in some casual clothes (if you can call a poncho casual), instead of her dressing gown.

"I'm going to work, touch any of my drinks and you're out of the house for good."

She wasn't bluffing either, for she had done it before when I was twelve; I had poured all the wine down the sink because I couldn't cope with her drinking anymore. She beat me senseless until I was black and blue, and then kicked me out into the garden, I had to sleep in the shed for several days, Oliver admittedly felt bad and brought me leftovers from dinner after the first night on an empty stomach; it was only when dad came home from a business trip did he realise I had been locked outside, and let me back in; the argument that followed was insane. She'd never apologised for doing it, and I honestly don't think she ever would.

Elisabeth opened the front door, stepped out, and then slammed it shut behind her without saying goodbye, allowing me to let out a loud sigh of relief. Home alone at last, finally I could let the ponies into the house, even though it was only last night when I saw them it seemed like I had been waiting forever; I still wondered if I'd gone crazy or not, this was utterly insane.
While I had confirmation that this was all real, this still didn't feel like true reality, if that made sense. But then again, how could it? There were talking ponies in my garden, it was hardly a conventional Sunday morning.

There was no doubt that Twilight's spell had broke when my head hit the wall, it was a hard knock. I rubbed the side of my still throbbing head, to find a lump had formed there. Although it was hurting like hell, the excitement of formally meeting the ponies helped me to block out the pain, that along with my two year's worth of being a boxer, I had learned how to take a decent beating.
I wanted to make my welcome as warm as possible, especially for Twilight, and headed upstairs to gather some books that could be useful to her, I also tidied my room so Rarity wouldn't make a fuss. When I was finished, I went downstairs and into the garden; I was quivering with excitement, I was absolutely ecstatic. To think, in a only matter of seconds I was going to see, and talk to, the 'mane six', I stood in the middle of the garden and waved both my arms and called out.

"It's all safe, you can come out now!"

I took a safe bet and guessed who would be the first pony to reveal herself, and was right; Pinkie bounced out from behind the shed, squeaking with joy.

"Oh oh, I can't wait to see the inside of an alien's house! I'm so excited, aren't you all excited? Oh my gosh I've never been so excited, well except for that one time when I ate a whole bag of sugar then jumped around the rooftops of Ponyville for an hour, but how can you top that!?"

The next to emerge was Rainbow Dash, followed by Applejack, then Rarity. Fluttershy and Twilight nervously came out together, I could understand why Fluttershy would be nervous, that was her very personality, but something was up with Twilight; I could tell that she didn't trust me, which I could understand, but she seemed afraid, really afraid, I could see it in her eyes from the moment I could look into them. She honestly looked like she had just seen her worst nightmare, something sinister was clearly plaguing her mind, I was desperate to find out, and decided that I'd ask her later.

"Please make yourself at home," I smiled, "just be sure to wipe your hooves on the mat when you come in."

I said it in a jokey way, but I feared what would happen if my mum found hoof prints in the house of all things, I knew what would happen. First she'd go nuts, then she'd ask me how they got there, then I'd be forced to lie, and then she'd gut me alive for the sake of it. By the looks of things the ponies were thinking the same thing.
I headed to the back door and held it open for everyone, wanting to be a hospitable as I could; thankfully none of them noticed my hands shaking. As soon as Pinkie had entered the house she was whizzing back and forward from the lounge to the kitchen squeaking with delight, the others entered in the same order as before.

"Oh such a gentlecolt." Rarity said as she walked past.

I chuckled sympathetically, but I didn't correct her, I'd teach them all the difference in human dialect later when we were more acquainted. Fluttershy looked at me cautiously as she went by, she didn't say anything but she nodded her head to say thanks, I was sure that with time she'd become more relaxed.

"Thank you." Twilight began, taking a single step forward.

At first I thought she had calmed down, until she continued.

"Listen here, you said that you're no threat to us, but I don't trust you, okay? If anything bad happens, you're to blame."

{Blimey, alright then...} I thought to myself.

Well something was certainly up with Twilight, from what I seen in the show, even in the most extreme situations, she had never been that rude. I wanted to ask her upfront what the matter was, but it was clear that I was already on thin ice with her. I guess it will be the same situation with Fluttershy, it would take time to get her to realise she is safe; I just had to keep it cool with Twilight and be a yes-man for her, I don't want any hostility between us.

"Of course, fully understood." I said calmly.

I gave her one of those 'Look, I get it.' kind of faces, so she could be sure that her message had got across; she seemed to find my response adequate and entered the house, and so I shut the door behind us. I headed into the kitchen where the other ponies were patiently waiting.

"You've been out there a long time, you must be hungry. What can I get for you all?"

Pinkie started jumping up and down and asked with an ear piercing volume.

"Oh, food! Food! Do you have any cupcakes?"

Funny enough, I had some chocolate cake in the fridge, I had bought it with my own money as well, so my mother wouldn't go ballistic.

"I don't have any cupcakes, but will chocolate cake do?"

She squealed and jumped up and down with the biggest smile on her face.

"Oh my gosh oh my gosh you have cake! Yes yes yes!"

Applejack rested her hoof on Pinkie's shoulder and calmed her down, then she turned to me.

"Do you have vegetables at all sugar cube?"

Zipping over to the fridge and opening it, I was thankful to find that it was stocked with all sorts of vegetables, (Oliver was fond of salads); sticking to the basics, I took out some carrots and some lettuce.

"Will these do?"

"Why, they'll do just fine, Sugarcube!"

A large smile unintentionally crept onto my face at being called Applejack's favourite pet name of Sugarcube. I chopped up enough carrots and lettuce to make a salad that would feed the five of them, while Pinkie was happy with cake.
After that, I invited them upstairs and into my room so I could ask why they were here, and why Celestia had sent them to me specifically; Rainbow Dash and Applejack were happy sitting on the floor, while the others sat on my bed, I picked up all the books that I had gathered in the corner and handed them to Twilight. I went to my chair by the computer desk and sat down, I decided to be the one to ask the first question.

"So, let's address the elephant in the room, what are you all doing here?"

I wasn't surprised that Twilight didn't answer, for she had planted her head into my 'AQA Science' textbook, studying it with full attention. Interestingly, it was Fluttershy whom responded, although I could barely hear her.

"Well, um... Not too long ago, um... Something from our world, something very, um, important... Well, it came here by mistake, and we're, um, just here to get it back."

The ponies honestly seemed just as confused about the matter as I was; Rarity finally spoke to help clear things up.

"You see, darling, a rather drastic occurrence has befallen our world. Not all that long ago, a precious item came here via a rift in space. Thankfully, Princess Celestia knew it had come here, seeing as we've been here before. Apparently there's a connection between our worlds due to the event prior. So, the item we're looking for is extremely important, it was made by the Titans themselves!"

"Hang on a second," I interrupted, "did you just say you've been here before?"

The white unicorn looked at the floor, thinking hard on the matter.

"Well, yes... It supposedly happened a few months ago... According to Princess Celestia, we came here once, only for an hour or so, and then we returned. The only reason I say 'supposedly' is because we actually can't remember a thing from the event, the Princess removed the memory from our minds. She told us that it was very important that we didn't remember what happened, as it could potentially cause some irreversible damages."

{Ho...ly... Crap...} I thought to myself, almost muttering it aloud.

I cast my mind back to yesterday, when Rainbow Dash alone had expressed such a great look of perplexity and curiosity towards me; a faint shiver rippled through my body as their previous reason for being here dawned upon me.
Dashie spoke next, whom only confirmed my theory.

"It's weird, since we started watching you, I've definitely been getting that feeling like I've been here before. There's something about all this human stuff that I feel used to. Honestly, it kind of feels like I could have been living in a human house for years or something."

There was no 'or something' about it, I knew exactly where her Déjà vu came from.
Still bearing the same intense expression from yesterday, the cyan pegasus looked at me, and I could see the whole story behind her puzzled eyes. All of it, gone from her mind; my eyes grew misty, as they always did when I read 'My Little Dashie' by Rob Cakeran...

{This can't be... How could a fan-fiction be real?}

Such a thought was utterly absurd, and yet it seemed to be the most logical answer. I began to feel somewhat dizzy, I was completely unprepared for yet another layer to this already crazy and complex turn of events, I was losing touch with reality.

"You okay there, Sugarcube? You're going a bit pale." Applejack said.

Breathing in deeply and coming back to my senses, I blinked rapidly and sighed.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just processing all this. Please Rarity, go on, you said something about Titans?"

Nodding, the unicorn continued.

"Yes, there were once six grand beings, called the Holy Titans of Harmony. It was these Titans who created our world, Equus. To keep their creation safe from all things dark, the Titans created an orb from a rare and unbreakable crystalline material known as titanstone, the orb's purpose was to generate a field around the planet which prevent all foreign entities from coming into contact with us, therefore protecting it from evil."

As I processed this new information, I silently studied the ponies and the expressions they wore; I still didn't understand why Celestia had sent them to me in the first place, I wished that I could ask her directly.
Gosh, just to personally lay eyes upon the Princess of the Sun herself, I'd do anything to have such an honour; that's finally when the thought hit me.

{What if I could go back to Equestria with the six?}

The thought was instantly shot down however, as I remembered what Celestia had said to the writer in My Little Dashie...

'He cannot join you in our world much like how you cannot stay in his.'

It would never have been allowed, it was not my place; the girls had simply come here to retrieve something important, and then return back home. Still, even if I couldn't go to Equestria with them, I would still help them, there was nothing for me here, I'd been miserably wasting away for years now with no aspirations other than to do something decent with my life before dying at a young age.
This was my chance, this was my 'something decent'.

"So, I'm guessing you want my help finding it?" I asked.

"Pretty much." Twilight replied, who had her head into yet another book.

As I looked from pony to pony, I noticed that Rarity was currently staring at my shoes with interest; after staring at them for a good few seconds, she looked up to face me.

"I do hope you don't mind me asking, but what's the purpose of those things attached to your paws?"

I couldn't help but laugh in a friendly manner, I still needed to teach them about the subtle difference in language between Earth and Equus; but before I could answer, Twilight spoke on my behalf.

"They are called shoes, and he doesn't have paws, humans have feet."

It began to bug me that Twilight was so on edge, but the real issue was the question of why? I had to get to the bottom of it soon, as I didn't want to start things off on bad terms, but for now I just had to be polite as possible to gain her trust.

"You're absolutely right, Twilight." I said warmly.

I went on to explain that human feet were rather sensitive in comparison to hooves, and often required footwear to protect them during excursions outside one's own home.

"My, how interesting!" Rarity exclaimed, prodding my shoe.

Chuckling, I decided to broaden subject, in hopes to generate some familiarity between us.

"So, is there anything else you'd like to know about humans? Those books leave out quite a lot."

Yet again, Rarity was the first to ask, she seemed far more inquisitive about this world than the others.

"What kind of education system do you have here?"

And so, I explained to them how schools work in England, I touched on all areas, from the social elements to the actual subjects such as maths, science and so on. We eventually got to exchanging troves of culture as the girls drew comparisons to their own education, and I ended up learning just as much about Equestrian schools and they did about English ones.
I noticed that Twilight wasn't reading anymore, she had been listening to me instead.

"Anything you'd like to know Twilight?" I asked.

"No, these books will do."

All the others stared in awe at Twilight's brusqueness, everyone had clocked on to her attitude at this point and knew it was uncalled for; Twilight looked around and quickly noticed the judgement from her friends, and faced me once more with an evidently fake smile.

"But thank you for the offer." She quietly spoke, going back to reading.

Everyone looked back to me, waiting to see my reaction to Twilight's behaviour; alas, I didn't want any conflict between us and so I simply ignored her attitude.

"Alright then, anyone else?"

Looking to one another and shrugging, they couldn't think of any further questions off the bat. Feeling like I'd perhaps put them on the spot a bit too much, I thought I'd ask one myself.

"How are we going to find this orb?"

Unsurprisingly, Twilight looked back up from her book to answer me. I quickly sussed out that when it came to the task at hand, about this orb, her behaviour was much more relaxed and civil, she very clearly wanted the job done.

"It's not so simple, when it entered your dimension, it broke into six pieces and scattered around the planet; that's why Princess Celestia sent us to you, she believes that you can help us navigate, and to keep us from danger."

"Across the whole planet?" I said in disbelief.

Twilight simply nodded and then went back to reading; I had to speak with her alone and find out why she was so tense, perhaps after we set off to find the orb.

"So, when do we move out?" I asked.

"Whenever you're ready I s'pose." Applejack replied.

That made me think...

{I could just leave, I could get away from this place right now, and see the whole world.}

I shivered with excitement, while I wasn't a religious person, it was hard not to consider this my true calling. But I couldn't just leave, not without anyone knowing. No matter how horrible my family were, I didn't want them to worry about where I had gone; I didn't care so much about my mother, but Oliver deserved better than that.
And what if my father miraculously came home after all these years? What if I never saw him again?

"What about my family?" I asked.

Rainbow Dash's jaw nearly hit the floor, she stared at me with disbelief.

"Seriously? Look at how they treat you! We've all seen how that dude bullies you, and how your mother abuses you, it was only this morning when she shoved your head into a damn wall, seriously just ditch them dude!"

Now that Rainbow Dash had brought it into mind, my head started throbbing again; Rarity noticed as I went to lightly rub the bump which was emitting a searing pain.

"Darling, let me take a look at that." She said with a sympathetic tone.

"It's fine, really."

"Nonsense, I can clearly see that you're in pain, now come here."

I didn't want anyone to make a fuss about it, but from the moment she got up off my bed and came towards me, I knew I had no choice in the matter. She gently combed over my head with a hoof, and I couldn't help but flinch as it touched the pulsating lump, Rarity gasped as she saw it.

"Still think it's fine? Darling, it looks like an egg has embedded itself into your head."

"How do you still care about them?" Rainbow Dash asked.

It was Applejack to speak up next, whom actually defended my concern.

"Rainbow, this is his family you're talking about here. He loves them, no matter how nasty they can be."

Turning to me, she continued.

"I can understand why you'd not want 'em worrying about you, not knowing what's become of you, right Sugarcube?"

Nodding, it was nice to know at least one of them got it. I couldn't stand my family, but I didn't want them forever wondering where I'd gone; my dad had already disappeared, and it was unfair for Oliver to deal with that again.

"So what? You're going to tell them you're going on an adventure or something?" Dashie said.

That's when a crazy idea popped up in my head.

"I'm not sure... I guess we could... Fake my death or something?" I suggested.

Needless to say, everyone was caught off guard; Fluttershy whimpered at the word death and buried her head into her hooves, Pinkie's mane somewhat deflated slightly, and Twilight's book hit the ground. The ponies were clearly touched by the word, but if they are going to travel around this planet with me, they would have to get used to it.
After a small awkward silence and the ponies looking at one another with uncertainty, Applejack spoke up.

"Sugarcube, are you sure you want to do that?"

After some hesitation, I nodded, and she blinked rapidly to disperse the tears in her eyes, hoping that I hadn't seen them, which I had. Something had hit her hard when I said 'death', more so than the others.

"But, just think of how they'll feel... When they find out you're dea-"

I put my hand on the orange mare's shoulder, cutting her off.

"Applejack, I honestly think it's for the best. I would rather they believe I'm dead and move on, rather than worry constantly about where I am and if I'm okay or not. Trust me, I believe this is the right thing to do."

She sniffed.

"Okay... If that's what you have to do. Then do it..."

She was hurting, I could see it in her eyes. Examining her expression, I raised my eyebrows with concern.

"Are you okay, Applejack?"

"Yeah, it's fine."

Looking up at all the others, I could tell the subject had created an awkward ripple through the group; I needed to change the subject, and fast.

"Look, we're not in any rush, my mum's gone all day so we've got a good twelve hours at least to make a decision, so let's just focus on something else for now, ey?"

That's when Twilight finally spoke without such a moody attitude.

"I agree, it would be nice to learn more about you and your culture before we move out."

With a wide smile, I dipped my head and relaxed.

"Absolutely, if we're going to be spending a lot of time together, it'd be good if we actually knew one another on a more personal basis. Is there anything you specifically had in mind?"

"Actually, yes, could we watch a 'Three-D' movie? I've just read up on them, and how humans can create movies with nothing but digitally generated content, and human voice actors to portray the characters."

"That sounds amazing!" Pinkie yelled.

Rainbow Dash joined in, "Yeah, that seems pretty cool."

The other ponies nodded in agreement, so I searched through my collection of films for a decent one to watch, keeping in mind that I would have to make a boundary for the content, I didn't want to expose Fluttershy and Pinkie to anything too violent or scary.
I scanned through my abundantly stocked library of films, and after a good five minutes, I still couldn't find anything that I considered suitable for them; that's when Pinkie Pie jumped up and down holding a film case in her hooves.

"Hey, what about this one?"

I rolled my eyes, as I'd now be watching the same film for the seventh time...

Chapter Three: Never Play Leapfrog

Chapter Three: Lil' Miss Stressy Pants

So, that was the seventh time I've had to sit through Kung Fu Panda, which turned out to be the perfect choice for everyone (good job, Pinkie), there was enough fighting and humour to entertain Dashie and Applejack, with enough well-written dialogue to stimulate Twilight and Rarity. Even Fluttershy was immersed by all the fight scenes, I was expecting her to hide under the pillow at all the violent parts; perhaps I underestimated the ponies' maturity.

"I think that was AWESOME!" Pinkie yelled.

"It was alright, but there should have been more action." Dashie said.

"Well I think it was perfect!" Pinkie screamed.

The two were left playfully arguing over how the film was, while I took the disk out of the TV and put it back into its box and onto the shelves. That was when Twilight approached me, ironically bearing a very unapproachable expression.

"Can we talk, alone?"

"Of course, let's go somewhere more private." I replied merrily.

I quickly informed the others that I'd only be gone for a few minutes, and then we walked out of the room together; escorting her to Oliver's room and shutting the door behind us so we had some privacy. This would definitely be my best chance to connect with Twilight, I gave the unicorn a warm smile as I sat down on Oliver's bed and got comfortable.

"So, what's up?"

Just as I had anticipated, she deflected my friendliness and chose to remain standing, looking me in the eye and frowning.

"It's obvious that my behaviour has taken you by surprise. What, were you just expecting me to be as ridiculous as the childish cartoon portrays me? Did you expect this whole ordeal to be some sort of gleeful childlike fantasy?"

Trying my best to level with her, I shook my head quickly and shrugged.

"I don't know what to expect, Twilight. I didn't even think you were real until yesterday."

Sighing in response, it was clear that she was trying her best to empathise with me, but was unable to do so very well.

"Do you want to know why I'm so on edge?"

She answered before I could even open my mouth, looking at her own hooves.

"Princess Celestia warned me of this world, I know what it holds. The others haven't got a clue what's going on, they think this is going to be some merry gallivant around a friendly alien world. I'm the only one who knows how much danger we are heading into, and worst of all, I know what's going to happen if we fail this mission."

"What do you mean? What's going to happen?"

She looked back up to me and stared into my eyes, on the verge of divulging to me, but eventually receded back into her shell and refused to answer. Not wanting to push it, I held back on asking further questions, I'd find out what she meant at a later date. For now, I knew she was right about the potential dangers ahead, but I wasn't going to just sit there and tell her that it's hopeless, I had to comfort her.

"It's going to be okay, Twilight-"

"No it's not!" She yelled, "Our lives are at stake here!"

Another outburst like that and the others would surely panic, if they hadn't already; I had to shut her up, so I tried a different approach. Furrowing my brow and scowling at the unicorn, I snapped back at her sternly, without giving her a chance to speak.

"Twilight, don't be such an imbecile, are you trying to demoralise the others? You're absolutely right, and I'm not going to lie to you, it is dangerous, it is risky, and I've barely a clue what lies ahead. But let me tell you this, if any danger comes to you, it's got to get through me first. I will die for your safety if that's what it takes, do you understand?
Now get your shit together, okay? I understand how you feel, but whether you like it or not, the only way you're going to get through this is to trust me."

In spite of Twilight's belligerence, she was completely taken aback from my sudden change in attitude, my approach somewhat appeared to be working.

"Now that you're here," I continued, "your safety is all that matters to me, and I'll give everything I have to give to ensure that you are all safe. Now then, no doubt your shouting has put the others on edge, so you need to pull yourself together and show them that everything is fine, and that there is nothing wrong; okay?"

She was well and truly speechless, my outburst caught her off guard.

"I'm just so afraid..." She sighed after a short silence.

Not wanting to pass on her lowered defences, I placed a hand on her shoulder.

"I know Twilight, I know... But you've got to trust me, I will protect you."

Whether it was the physical contact, or what I had said, it didn't matter, I'd overstepped my bounds; something snapped and she glared at me, brushing my hand off her with a hoof.

"No, I don't trust you, Princess Celestia has told me enough about your kind, she's shown me exactly how twisted your species can be. I am not trusting you, and I never will, no matter how nice you pretend to be. We aren't friends, and it will stay that way for as long as we're on this planet together. You are nothing but our guide."

Hoofsteps sounded on the wood floorboards outside, and we both went quiet; the bedroom door opened, and Applejack's head popped around the corner.

"Everythin' alright in here, you both?"

I gave Twilight a very quick glare, too fast for Applejack to notice. she looked at Applejack with a smile.

"Yes Applejack, everything's fine." She said.

Applejack looked at me with a doubtful expression, clearly not believing Twilight; I gave the farm pony a warm smile and nodded with certainty.

"Everything's absolutely fine, we're just discussing the mission, I hope the five of you aren't too bored in there."

"Nah, we're all reading those books of yours, they're really interesting, they're so in-depth and tell so much about your kind, you humans sure are something..." She replied.

"Yeah, they sure are something." Twilight remarked coldly.

I had no idea what Princess Celestia has told Twilight, but my best guess was that she'd taught her about the world wars, terrorism, murder, and most, if not all of the other atrocities that exist in this world. That's when a jolt of fear ran through me and brought on one of those cold sweats, I had a book about food somewhere in my collection, what if the others found it? If they found out that humans were omnivores and not herbivores, who knows how they'd react...
Jumping to my feet, I knew there was no more gain with Twilight for now, and hoped I could get the group away from the books before they stumbled upon something I'd rather they didn't find.

"Alrighty then, books can be fun, but they don't entertain forever; let's find something more active to do!"

Hurrying out of the room and into mine, I was instantly greeted by the smiles of the other ponies; I couldn't help but simply grin along with them, just walking into a room to see these characters from my favourite TV show made me feel so warm, and happy inside; it truly was a dream come true.
By the looks of things, they hadn't found the book I had in mind; I sighed a breath of relief, only to inhale in a huge lungful of surprise as Pinkie jumped in front of me, her nose no more than a centimetre away from mine.

"Are there any games we can play? I'm bored of books now, let's do something else, what games do humans play? Do you have any more cake? Anyway what games can we play? I bet you have loads and loads of fun games. Can we play a game huh? Huh? Can we? Can we?"

I didn't really know how to respond, there was no reason we couldn't play a game of some sort, but I had no idea of what to play, the only games I played these days involved holding a controller and looking at a screen. Sport wise I only played basketball and rugby, and I don't think either of those would suit their fancy. Eventually I decided to take the easy route and knock the ball back into her court.

"Sure! Do you have any idea on what you would like to play?"

The hyperactive pony stopped and froze like a block of ice, she didn't even appear to be breathing, she was completely motionless; I nervously chuckled and turned to Applejack with a look of bewilderment, to which she laughed.

"She's thinkin' hard, Sugarcube, that's all."

After about ten seconds of being utterly motionless, the pink pony started vibrating before jumping up and down in a fashion identical to her cartoon self, during a particularly big jump, her head bumped the ceiling and the bouncing ceased, her mane now wobbling like jelly.

"I have a great idea!" She screamed, "Let's all play hide and seek!"

Raising an eyebrow and pursing my lips, I looked to Rainbow Dash and Applejack and assumed that they would be a bit too old for such a game; Dashie groaned under her breath and Applejack rolled her eyes and gave me a look as if to say 'fine, but let's just get it over with.'

"Is that what everybody wants to play?" I asked.

"Everybody?" Rarity asked, "Surely you mean everypony?"

I smiled and leaned against the wall, deciding that it would be good to quickly deal with this little subject before playing.

"Well, here on Earth, we say things a little differently. It's rather obvious that we don't have talking civilised ponies here, so saying everypony would be rather pointless, so we say everybody." I explained.

Emitting a simple 'ah', to begin with, Rarity's eyes darted around sheepishly, clearly feeling a bit like an idiot; wishing not to make similar mistakes in the future, she inquired if I could teach her more humanisms.

"By all means." I confirmed.

A few minutes went by as I taught the girls various differences in vocabulary between humans and ponies, such as hooves to hands or feet, stallions to men, colts to boys, mares to women, and so on. The ponies were amazed by the small but significant changes in the dialect, despite us speaking the same language.
I was about to ask if they had any questions when Pinkie randomly started to jump up and down.

"Hey, we haven't played hide and seek yet!"

"Oh come on then, let's go." I laughed, playfully rolling my eyes.

While we were originally doing this just to keep Pinkie entertained, it turned out to be like most games and became quite fun once we all got into it, besides Twilight of course, who sat by the shed reading books.
We had played for almost two hours, and I'd actually really come to enjoy myself; I was certainly the hardest to spot, thanks to the girls all having the disadvantage of being so brightly coloured.

"Let's set Callum a challenge!" Pinkie yelled, "All five of us are the seekers, while Callum hides!"

"Make it fair though," I said, "no using magic to find me, and no flying too high!"

The ponies all agreed, covering their eyes and starting to count. Now, if they were going to challenge me, then I'd challenge them back, I ran over to the ironwood tree in the garden, and climbed to the very top; they'd never suspect me to be so high up.

"Twenty one! Twenty two!" Rainbow Dash called.

I absolutely loved being up in this tree, the ironwood's branches were almost impossible to break, so I always had confidence in scaling to the top. I could get a whole view of the garden, not to mention the park beyond it.

"Twenty three! Twenty four!" Applejack shouted.

Looking down towards the house, I suddenly started feeling a bit homesick, the childish feelings subsided as the realisation that I'd never come back here again crept up on me, I'd be leaving my whole life behind, my computer, my games, my best friends, my online pen-pals, and my beloved dog, Chilli.

"Twenty five! Twenty six!" Rarity yelled.

My attention drifted back to the ponies as they counted, the previous feeling washed away and my enthusiasm was restored over time; to travel with the 'mane six' in order to help save Equestria, no, all of Equus!
It was worth it, it was worth it all.

"Twenty seven! Twenty eight!" Fluttershy squeaked.

Everything I had in life now, it could never be half as good as this opportunity, to go somewhere else, to do something else, and to be someone else! And to think, if I actually succeeded in helping the ponies repair this orb, I would be revered as a hero, just like in all the fictional tales, the hero who saved the world.
Who wouldn't take the chance to achieve such a title?

"Twenty nine! THIRTY!!!" Pinkie Pie screamed at the top of her lungs.

All five ponies scattered across the garden searching for me, while I sat there in the tree watching them search for me.

A gentle mid-summer breeze of blew against my face, lightly caressing it without being strong enough to irritate my senses; taking in a large breath of air, I closed my eyes, and for the first time, I felt happy.
Like, truly happy.
Never before had I experienced such a deep feeling of mirth. Sure, I've had the standard sense of happiness and joy over my life, like when I opened my first Xbox, or when I received a laptop for Christmas, but this was a whole new type of happy, I felt it deep within me, I felt genuinely happy as a person, like I had found a purpose in life, it was wonderful.

I'd zoned out for some time, simply relishing in such a brilliant and peaceful mood; that was when I suddenly felt a hard, smooth object gently nudge my arm.

"Umm, excuse me, I found you."

I whipped around to find Fluttershy sitting calmly on the same branch as I, lightly prodding me with her hoof; I jumped slightly and almost fell out of the tree altogether, how had she crept up on me so efficiently?
She really was the quiet one...

"How did you find me?" I asked.

"With my eyes..." She replied with her tongue sticking out.

I couldn't help but burst out laughing, I had never expected in a million years for Fluttershy to give such a sharp and witty reply, especially seeing as I was still somewhat of a stranger to her.

"It's nice up here isn't it?" I asked, still chuckling.

"It's wonderful," she replied, "trees are beautiful, and you can always get such a wonderful view from the top. To be perfectly honest, sometimes I'd quite like to be a tree..."

I giggled as I drew a likeness to a very similar quote she had once said in the cartoon. It seemed that Fluttershy had warmed to me already, she had totally relaxed and was all happy, next step, Twilight.

"Well," I said, "let's go and tell the others you found me."

Fluttershy slowly climbed down using her wings for support, while I simply jumped after sliding down a couple of metres. As I hit the ground, I performed a roll so I didn't hurt anything, and used the momentum to spring back up to my feet; I stood up to see Rainbow Dash staring at me with raised eyebrows, clearly impressed.

"Did you just jump from up there?" She asked.

Giving a casual shrug and a nod, I didn't overly want to show off about it, I had been climbing trees from a young age and had fallen from enough of them to know when a landing was safe or not. My passion for climbing had led me to always take me to take the fastest route, and if there was an obstacle in the way, overcome it.

"Ooh, my, I would never dream of jumping from up there." Fluttershy murmured.

"Uh, Fluttershy, you have wings!" Teased Dashie, nudging her playfully.

I chose to interrupt before Fluttershy could respond, after seeing the episodes Cutie Mark Chronicles and Hurricane Fluttershy, I knew well enough that she was sensitive about her wings.

"So, where are the others? I imagine they're still looking for me?" I asked.

"Yeah, Fluttershy went off on her own and I decided to follow her." Rainbow Dash replied.

"I'll go look for them." Fluttershy squeaked.

Once again, I couldn't help but find myself smiling, this time at Fluttershy's voice, it was just so adorable; whenever I had heard it in the show, I received a feeling of comfort and security, something I'd always longed for. But now, hearing it in real life, I felt like I had to return the favour, as though she were a child of mine.
I had to keep her safe, I had to keep them all safe.

Fluttershy trotted away as silent as a mouse, leaving me and Rainbow Dash alone. Believing I could get some further information about Twilight from her companions, I decided to branch out.

"Hey Rainbow Dash, do you have any idea what's going on with Twilight? I understand she's nervous of being here, the whole lot of you must be, but I don't think she's telling me the whole story. Do you know why she's being so cold and standoffish with me?"

Rainbow Dash responded with a disgruntled sigh.

"Dude, I wish I knew. She started acting like this a few days before we came here, it was just after Princess Celestia gave us this mission. She took Twilight away to have a private talk with her, and she's been really touchy ever since. It's like she's become a completely different pony, she's always on edge now. Sometimes she gets up in the middle of the night and walks around, only me and Applejack know about it."

The plot thickens, so whatever was getting to Twilight had something to do with Celestia, and it was making her restless on a daily and nightly basis. At least some of the girls were aware of it, I'd need their help in getting her to spill the beans.

"Huh, odd. What do you think the Princess said to her?" I asked.

She only shrugged, and was about to share her thoughts when the others came along.

"Where in tarnation were you? We've been searching everywhere!" Applejack exclaimed.

Before I could answer, Fluttershy pointed to the top of the ironwood tree with a ginormous grin on her face, ruffling her wings in prideful delight; I presumed that she'd rarely won these sort of games, which hardly surprised me.

"I found him up there."

"Wow, I would never have guessed. Nice one, Sugarcube!"

Merrily trotting up to the buttery pegasus, Applejack put her into a gentle headlock and ruffled her mane; we were all praising her and merrily conversing until Twilight came along, instantly generating an uncomfortable atmosphere.

"Playtime's over, can we get a move on now? Or do you all need a few more minutes of acting like foals?"

Needless to say, the others were speechless, as was I. Twilight was really pushing it now, her blunt behaviour was expected at this point, but blatant rudeness was bang out of order, and it seemed Rainbow Dash thought the same.

"Alright, that's it, if nopony else is going to call you out, then I will! I've had enough of this Twilight! What the heck has gotten into you? I don't give a flying feather what Princess Celestia's told you, I am sick of you being so rude all the time!"

Twilight glared back at Rainbow, holding her ground.

"Rude? Rude!? You have no idea what's at stake here! Nor do you have a clue about the danger we're in! Do you understand that you might never see home again? You could die here! All of our lives are at stake, and all you care about is fun and games!"

It seemed the gloves had come off, there was no sugarcoating the situation now; I looked to Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy with caution, and as expected they both seemed somewhat terrified, Flutters was hiding behind her mane and Pinks was attempting to hide under her hooves.

"Jeez, overreaction much? Just shut up Twilight! There hasn't been a single day where you haven't been uptight, preaching your doom and gloom. I could deal with you being a grouch, but now you're just a bitch!''

Even with the high tension, I was not expecting swearing. Rainbow Dash and Twilight had edged closer and closer to one another, their noses no more than a few centimetres apart, teeth bared. Twilight looked as if she were about to strike her friend, a fight would surely break out if I didn't intervene; I rushed forward and stood between the two of them, using my deeper voice and larger size to establish dominance over the both of them.

"That's enough! I will not have you fighting amongst yourselves! Come on, we haven't even left my house yet! Twilight's absolutely right, you are here on a dangerous mission, and I am to be your guide. Tomorrow we will try to pinpoint the first part of the orb, then we decide exactly how we're going to fake my death, and then we shall set off, okay? Now will the both of you calm down? I don't want any further hostility!"

All the ponies were speechless, my first impression had given them a 'gentle giant' image, so my sudden change of mood and booming voice had shocked them all, even Twilight was taken aback; poor Fluttershy was cowering in fear.
Without uttering a word, Twilight stormed off to the shed to remove herself from the situation.
I took a frustrated sigh, had I overdone it? Applejack walked next to me and thankfully dispelled my worries.

"You've done nothin' wrong Callum, I'm not sure what the Princess has told her, but it's gone straight to that mare's head. I'll try to go calm her down, take the others inside, I'll be along in a bit."

She walked past me and trotted after Twilight to the shed in attempt to reason with her. The others all looked around awkwardly, clearly embarrassed and unsure of what to do. Approaching Fluttershy, whom was still trembling, I knelt down beside her and spoke in a calm, gentle tone.

"Hey, it's okay now Fluttershy, it's okay."

Slowly looking up at me, she blinked away the tears which were blurring her vision.

"Tw-Twi... Twilight said we're all going to die!"

"No..." I sighed, shaking my head slowly.

Tilting my head and smiling with compassion, I placed a hand on the pony's mane and combed my fingers through it, gently stroking past the back of her ear.

"Twilight is scared, just like you, and fear very often causes one to exaggerate on a situation, and Twilight is coming up with the absolute worst possible outcome. Look, I know we've only just met and that you've got no reason to trust me yet, but I am going to protect you, Fluttershy, all of you. Against all and any threat we may face, I vow to keep you safe, no harm will come to you, do you understand me?"

I'd never really thought that I was good with words, but whatever I had said had done the trick; the pegasus lifted her head and her shaking came to a halt.

"Okay... I believe you..." She stuttered quietly.

I had expected it to take days for Fluttershy to so much as talk to me, let alone put her faith in me; I certainly wouldn't betray such a fragile trust, this was a commitment for life, and I intended to stick to it. Looking to the others, it seemed Pinkie had also calmed down. In fact, it appeared as thought everyone had returned to normal; Rarity smiled warmly at me, while Rainbow Dash was absolutely beaming and making no attempts to hide it, I couldn't help but smile back at such an adorable face.

"What?" I asked innocently.

"Well, it's just that Fluttershy's never warmed up to anyone that fast before, not since meeting some colt ages ago. You might not be a pony, but still, I just didn't expect her to get so close, so quickly."

At Dashie's mention of "some colt", I noticed that Fluttershy very sheepishly combed her mane over her face to hide her blushing cheeks. Fluttershy, having a boyfriend? Surely not. While it wasn't impossible, I highly doubted that Fluttershy had the confidence to engage in such a relationship, but then again, what did I actually know about these ponies?
It would have to remain yet another mystery, alongside the Twilight Sparkle conundrum.

"Can we go back inside now?" Pinkie piped up unexpectedly.

"Yeah," I replied, "I suppose we need to discuss plans for our journey."

I headed towards the house, and the others followed suit.

{What the bloody hell did Celestia say to Twilight?} I kept thinking to myself as I walked.

Twilight was obviously the leader of this expedition, and I needed her trust. Being able to work alongside her positively would surely help us stay out of trouble. But how, just how, could I earn her trust with this current behaviour? I'd have to do something pretty damn spectacular.

Opening the back door, I held it open for everypony just like before. I was about to follow them inside when I noticed Applejack appearing from behind the shed, hopefully she'd managed to calm Twilight down.

"You four head upstairs, I'm going to wait for AJ."

Applejack noticed that I was waiting for her and went into a trot as not to keep me waiting. Observing her as she approached, I found it interesting how the girls were all bigger than ponies on Earth, they stood at around chest height for me, with a rough estimate, I'd say they were all about four and a half feet tall. Rarity was definitely the tallest, it would be interesting to measure them all and know for sure.

"Y'all right sugar cube?" Applejack asked, bringing me back from my thoughts.

"Yeah, fine thanks. How's Twilight?"

Sighing heavily, the farm pony itched her brow with a foreleg.

"She's blowin' steam over there. Hay, I don't know what's gotten into that mare, but it's somethin' sour."

Humming, I shrugged.

"Well, we really need to plan out this whole expedition, and there's no good doing it without her. So she needs to calm down and get her arse back indoors."

Nodding with acknowledgement, Applejack turned around and began to head back to the shed.

"Wait."

Turning back to face me, she raised an eyebrow with confusion.

"Head on in, I'll talk to her."

"Uh, you're kiddin' right?"

I shook my head, and started heading over. After some brief thought, I had a rough idea of what I was going to say and it would sound best coming from me directly.

"Well, it's your funeral..." Applejack tutted, going into the house and disappearing out of sight.

Trudging over to the shed, it at first appeared as though there wasn't a camp at all, that was until I spotted a little silver ball attached to the shed's outer wall, glimmering faintly, it was no bigger than a peanut. Out of curiosity, I went over I prodded the gem-like object, and was amazed to witness three tents and a fire-pit materialise out of thin air, it was like something one would see in a sci-fi movie.
The camp itself had been really well set up, the tents were all perfectly stitched, (I presumed it was Rarity's work), the fire-pit was gorgeous, with curved stones all around it which were all white as marble. The fire was still burning, even though there was no wood in the pit, I guessed that it was magic. The whole setup looked excellent, these ponies knew what they were doing when it came to camping, I was impressed.

Although I was fascinated by the camp, my attention was drawn to a single tent in particular as I detected an odd sniffing noise, it took me a couple of seconds to realise what it was, it was the sound of crying.

"I should probably write up a last will and testament, but hey-ho..." I quietly muttered to myself.

Approaching the tent, I parted the entrance and peered inside to find Twilight sitting there with her back to the entrance, loudly sniffing to herself.

"Twilight, are you okay?" I asked.

"Go away..." She breathed, almost out of earshot.

"C'mon, Twilight, tell me what's going on so I can help."

"I said, go away... You are the last individual I would want to speak with right now..."

Kneeling down, I reached forward and gently placed my hand on her outer shoulder in attempt to comfort her; needless to say, this was a bad move. Before I could react, she whipped around and punched me right in the mouth; I fell back and sat there in disbelief. Holy shit, she could actually punch pretty hard, my lips felt like they were on fire.

"I said go away!" She yelled, glaring at me.

Wiping my lip to find a generous amount of blood, I remained expressionless and stared at her in shock, whom blinked at me rapidly and opened her mouth to speak, she looked genuinely sorry for a moment.

"I... I didn't mean to..."

Shaking her head slightly, her sorrow faded, and she simply studied my face in silence.

"I don't think I deserved that." I uttered blankly.

Taken aback and somewhat unnerved by my state of calmness, Twilight froze, to which I continued.

"Now then, I can see that a lot of stress has been bestowed on to you, an unfair amount, is that safe to say? I can help you manage that, y'know? But you've got to tell me what the Princess shared with you in private. Nothing is going to be resolved until I know exactly what the matter is."

"How do you know that the Princess talked to me alone?" She sniffed, recovering from her tearful state.

"Come on, it's no big secret, she spoke with you privately after the mission briefing."

"The others told you didn't they?" She asked.

I simply nodded, to which she started scowling at me.

"It's none of your business, all six of you! What I saw is for me to know, and me alone!"

Although it somewhat was my business, there was clearly no breakthrough in sight for now and I didn't want to push it, for now I just needed her to come inside the house to help make a plan.
Sighing, I gave up.

"Suit yourself Twilight, if you want to keep it to yourself and continue on whatever dark path you're on, then do. But whenever you're ready to be a team player, feel free to open up. I'll leave the decision to, but for now we need you in the house as we're making plans on how we're going to find this orb of yours."

I stood up and walked out of the camp before she could respond, if there was one thing I'd gathered about Twilight already, it was that she loved getting the last word in. As I headed back towards the house, I heard the tent unzip and the sound of hoofsteps in the grass behind me.
Strange, even after the foul behaviour she had displayed since meeting her, and despite the arguments that had transpired today alone, heck, even after she had hit me in the face! (Regardless of whether that was intentional or not...)
There was something about her, something I could relate to.
Although I couldn't put my finger on it, I felt a connection of some sort.

I don't know why but, I couldn't help but smile, just a little...

Chapter Four: Early Complications

Stepping into my room, I was instantly greeted by Rainbow Dash, donning a warm grin.

"Hey dude! So, Rarity's come up with some sort of plan."

"Brilliant," I replied, "let's hear it."

Before Rarity could elaborate, Applejack walked up to me and squinted at my face.

"Sugarcube, what in tarnation has happened to your chin there?"

At that, Rarity looked at me with more attentiveness and spotted the bruise that had formed, along with the small bloodied tear in my lip; she gasped and promptly dashed up to me, knocking Applejack out of the way in order to tend to me.

"Darling, that looks really painful! How ever did this happen to you?"

Rainbow Dash frowned and opened her mouth to speak, it was pretty clear that she was going to accuse Twilight, and even though she'd have been correct, I didn't want to cause any further hostility between the two of them.

"I tripped over, on the way back from talking to Twilight." I blurted out.

Rainbow Dash gritted her teeth and gave me a look that clearly said, 'I know that you're lying'. She was just about to question my excuse when Twilight walked in behind me; as she did so, Rarity turned to face her and pointed at my mouth.

"Look at his face, just look at it..."

Twilight peered at the blemish and then gave me a subtle glare, clearly assuming that the first thing I'd done was grass her up by reporting her attack; luckily Rarity finished her sentence before she could speak.

"You must have hit something pretty hard when you fell over, did you land on a rock or something?"

"Somewhat, it was one of the flowerpots just on the patio. I tripped over my own feet, rarely happens, but I'm guilty of it from time to time. I swear I'm not usually this clumsy."

Twilight looked at me and raised an eyebrow, obviously she not expecting me to cover for her. Perhaps this could be the start of earning her trust? I winked at her, and for the first time in a while, I saw the corners of her lips raise, just a little, it wasn't much, but it was definitely a start.

“Yeah,” She said, “it does look pretty bad. I hope it's not too painful.”

I then noticed the expression on her face change, it was the same look I had seen on my mother's face this morning, that faintly shimmering sense of regret; she had felt bad for hitting me. But alas, just like with my mother, the expression only lasted for a short time.

“Well, I suppose you should have watched where you were going. The Princess sent us to you because you're supposed to be able to guide us, so if you're not capable of guiding yourself past your own limbs correctly, then you're hardly the right guide for us.”

{Um, ouch...} I thought to myself.

That was more than a mere jab, she was pushing it, no, she was pushing me! The realisation then crossed my mind that she might have been trying to provoke me into flipping out or something. It was as though she wanted to ensure the others were also mistrustful of me, but it wasn't going to work.
The others were once again shocked, but kept quiet, even Rainbow Dash, who looked like she was about to explode, remained silent.

“Quite right, it shan't happen again.” I said, chuckling sheepishly.

Playfully batting away Rarity's hooves from my chin, I asked the pearly white unicorn what the supposed plan she'd come up with was; she respectively backed away and sat on the floor, flicking her perfectly curled mane aside with glamour, I couldn’t help but smile, even on another planet, she managed to retain her style.

“Well, you see, when the Titan's Orb was separated from our world, some of its essence was left behind. Princess Celestia had Twilight absorb this essence into her body with magic, meaning she can use a tracking spell that will point towards the direction of the orb.”

I hummed with interest and looked at Twilight, then back to Rarity.

{Could have mentioned that earlier.} I murmured in thought.

“Well that makes things a lot less complicated.” I stated enthusiastically.

“That it does,” Rarity continued, "so all we need to do is have Twilight use the spell and we can embark right away.”

The others hummed and nodded in agreement, clearly wanting to get a move on.

“Well, that's going to make this mission easier by a long shot. But now we need to take care of the dark matter of faking my death. How best should we go about that?”

Now I thought this would take forever to plan out, until Pinkie Pie came out of nowhere and blew my mind.

“That’s easy-peasy, one-two-threesy! All you need is Twilight to use her cloning spell, and make it look all dead-like and make it out as if it was your body!”

I was gobsmacked, Pinkie Pie, out of all ponies...
It seemed as though she had the ability to generate a perfect idea at random intervals, a perk that would surely come in handy over our mission.

“Pinkie, you’re a genius!” I praised.

“No I’m not, I’m a pony!” She giggled.

Every pony in the room laughed, even Twilight smirked. The unicorn then approached me and explained that the spell was not only difficult to cast, but that it would never create a completely functional copy of me, due to the complexity of such a feat, the clone would be more like a mirror image of myself, unable to conjure his own opinions and thoughts.

"Would you like a demonstration of the spell?" She asked.

"By all means, fire away!" I replied.

Twilight's horn began to glow brightly, followed by a thin stream of purple light coming out of my chest, it wasn't painful in the slightest, it just felt really warm, it was the strangest sensation. The stream of light gathered into a shimmering ball in front of me, which only grew bigger and bigger, it was one of the most amazing things I'd ever seen in my life!
The ball of light began to stretch out, it twisted and turned and I then noticed that it was shaping into the form of a human, shaping into me. The light was so pure, I almost felt like I was in a trance, and in a split second, the light faded.
And right before me, stood a replica of myself.

"Whoa..." I breathed, utterly mesmerised.

The others giggled quietly as they watched me process this event, gazing at my clone with wide eyes.

"Whoa." The clone spoke.

I jumped back a good few feet and nearly shat a brick.

"You can talk?" I asked with awe.

"I can talk?" He asked in reply.

I circled the clone in absolute awe, observing myself from another's perspective, it was beyond surreal.
And damn, was my arse really that good?
Giving my clone's bubble-butt a firm poke, he turned to look at me.

"Jeez, take me out on a date first at least." He spoke.

Everypony (myself included) laughed aloud at that, it seemed that the clone could even form his own sentences, the hilarity went on for a few minutes before Twilight brought it to a close.

"Alright, that's enough now, it was only a demonstration." She huffed with amusement.

Her horn once again shone brightly, and the clone started to glow in turn; small pieces of his body then began to break away into wisps of light, which faded away into nothingness. In his very last moments of existence, he began to sing depressingly, accepting his end.

"Hello darkness, my old friend... I've come to talk with you again..."

His singing came to a halt as his entire being eventually fell apart and vanished altogether.

"Well... That was an experience..." I murmured.

Settling down from the event, we all got back to business.

"Right, so in all seriousness, how are we going to do this?" Asked Applejack.

With nobody offering to make a suggestion, I put forward an idea.

"Well, we could possibly simulate a break in, and play out that I was killed by the intruders, then there's a plausible excuse for my death which wouldn't be looked into."

"And how are we be able to do that? I can't just conjure up some people to break into your house." Twilight grumbled.

"It's simple, we break in ourselves! I could kick the front door down, and we just smash a few things here and there, and it'll look like someone's broken into the house." I explained with a toothy grin.

The girls all looked around at one another, shrugging, and then looked back to me.

"Sugarcube, is that really necessary?" Applejack asked.

"Why of course, it needs to look authentic! Besides, we could all blow off some steam before heading out, nothing relieves stress better than breaking a few things." I replied.

"Hm, I suppose you're right..."

I headed over to my wardrobe, and pulled out a huge rucksack, the biggest I could find.

"What's that for darling?" Rarity asked.

"Supplies, for the journey! You've all got bags, why shouldn't I have one?" I answered.

"Hmm, touché." She replied.

"So, when do you plan on trashing this place then?" Rainbow Dash asked.

That made me think, what did I need to take? And what about the dogs? I couldn't leave them here or they'd run away, I wanted the best for them; but who would look after them for me? Perhaps I could tie them to something for when Oliver or my mum got back, but that might look suspicious. Was I overthinking this?

That's when a thought hit me, I had a really close friend, Bruce Harding. He was one of my best friends, and would definitely look after the dogs, he was a brony like myself, and was a huge lover of animals. Bruce was a top bloke and would be more than happy to take care of the dogs for me, even if the police ended up searching for them.
He only lived a couple miles away too, it would be about a forty minute walk at most.

"Today if we can, but first I have to do something..." I replied to the pegasus.

"And what is this something that you have to do?" Twilight asked.

"I need to find somewhere for the dogs to stay, so that they're safe, I have a friend who might look after them." I explained.

"No," the unicorn commanded, "we are not delaying the mission for the sake of your mutts, we can just-"

"I'm sorry, I don't think I heard that correctly," I interrupted, scowling at her.

Taking a step forward towards her, Twilight gulped, realising that she'd genuinely offended me.

"It's funny, it almost sounded like you just called my beloved dogs, mutts."

I scowled deep into her large eyes, causing her to shiver; my genuine glare was on par with Fluttershy's stare.

"N-No, you heard wrong... You can inform your friend, but you better know what you're doing..." She stuttered.

"Oh, excellent! No problems then." I cheered, bursting back into my usual smile.

I picked up my rucksack, and headed to the door.

"Alright, I'm going to fill this thing with supplies, are you girls okay with being in here on your own for a bit?"

They all nodded, besides Twilight, who sat there grinding her teeth, clearly embarrassed and angry, and Dashie's quiet giggling wasn't helping.

I headed downstairs and into the kitchen. The first place I searched was the cupboard, a perfect place to find snacks and non-perishables; Oliver was prone to snacking throughout the day, and so the stock was frequently diminished in as much time as it took to restock it.
Thankfully, my mother had been shopping only two days prior, so I had a lot to choose from; I decided to think long-term and grabbed things that would last a long time without going bad, (fruit and such would need to be found along the journey, rotten food in my bag was the last thing I needed).
I ended up grabbing a good twenty bags of salty crisps, very many sweets and chocolate, (mostly for Pinkie), a massive box of Weetos, a bag of pasta, a truck load of Pot Noodle, and every tin of baked beans I could find; although I hated beans with a passion, I knew that I'd need them for protein, it was a no-brainer that I wouldn't be eating meat for a while.

With meat on the mind, I thought hard on the issue, even if I became a vegetarian, the ponies would find out one way or another, and when that happened, any kind of friendship that I'd currently formed with the six would go straight out the window. I fought hard to let the thoughts blow away, and decided that I'd cross that bridge when I came to it.
For now, I needed to get my other supplies besides food.
I dashed around the house grabbing things I might need, sheets of paper, some pencils, my toothbrush and accompanying toothpaste, my Swiss Army knife, phone and solar phone charger.
I also grabbed a few rolls of toilet roll from the bathroom, going vegetarian was bad enough, I wasn't going to use leaves to wipe my arse if I could help it.

I headed back upstairs, now with enough supplies in my rucksack to last a good few months, I opened my door to find the six ponies chatting to one another, they all smiled as I walked in.

"So, Callum, who's this friend of yours that we're going to meet?" Rarity piped up.

Before I could answer, Twilight jumped up.

"Meet? I said nothing about meeting him!" She barked.

For once, I decided to hold my ground and see where it got me.

"That's quite funny Twilight, because I don't remember asking for your permission."

She opened her mouth to speak, but I continued before she could utter another word.

"Look Twilight, I'm throwing away my entire life to do this, and I'm well aware there's no going back. The last thing I want to do before leaving is ensure my pets are safe, and I'm not going to let you take that from me.
Now I'm only going to say this once, I'm taking my dogs to my friend, and you are not going to deny me that right, okay?"

Clenching her jaw, Twilight was clearly about to object, which was when she spotted her friends eyeing her, waiting for her reaction. Swallowing her anger, she remained silent and nodded reluctantly.

"Following your question Rarity, his name is Bruce Harding. He's an animal lover, just like you Fluttershy."

At that, the butter coloured pegasus jumped up with delight, instantly growing more talkative.

"He loves animals? Oh wow, that's wonderful! What animals does he have?" She asked excitedly.

"You can ask him in a moment, I'm about to call him on Skype." I replied.

"Uh, sugarcube, what in tarnation is a Skype?" Applejack asked.

I knew that they'd know nothing about Skype, or any PC programs for that matter, but it felt nice to explain something that Miss Egghead Sparkle didn't know anything about.

"Well, Skype is a really useful application on this device of mine, that allows me to communicate with anyone across the the world instantly."

Everypony was amazed, they had never been shown such technology.

"Across the whole planet!" Rainbow Dash asked.

"Eeyup!" I replied with a huge grin.

I looked at Twilight, who was now back to her old original self, eager to learn; about goddamn time...

Opening my laptop screen and hitting the 'on' button, it instantly sprung to life, the screen lit up with the 'Acer, Empowering People' logo, before going to the login screen; I entered my password and went to my desktop, and instantly regretted it, as my desktop background was that of the Windows logo, with Derpy Hooves sticking her head through it.

"Hey!" Rainbow Dash shouted, "That's Derpy!"

I looked from pony to pony, only to find them smiling and giggling at the image, I had expected them to be horrified at seeing a cartoon image of one of their kind on my computer screen.

"Uh, yeah! That's Derpy alright! Although to be perfectly honest, I was expecting you all to be a little unsettled at seeing her on here, I'm not sure how much you know about the cartoon."

Thankfully Rarity cleared the mist and clarified what they all knew.

"Well dear, during our mission briefing, Princess Celestia explained to us about how we co-exist in your world in the form of an animated story for children. Broadcasted via your, um, what is it called? A talvision?"

"Close, it's called a television, or just T.V for short." I corrected.

Rarity gave an interested 'hmm' in acknowledgement, and I decided to carry on with my query.

"But I don't get it, I would've thought that you'd be freaked out by knowing that you're a T.V show here, what gives?"

"Oh trust me darling, we were to start with, incredibly so in fact. But the Princess explained everything in thorough, and even used a spell to show us some of the cartoon directly, it might have been rather weird at first, but we soon adjusted to the facts. I must say at least, it was quite entertaining to see myself as an animated character, you humans are very talented with your work."

Humming with understanding, their reactions made a lot more sense. Still, I didn't expect Celestia to do such a thing, and besides, how did she acquire a memory spell that included a vision of the show in the first place?

"Might I ask, how did Princess Celestia get a hold of the footage to show you?" I asked.

"She didn't say, only that it was something she'd acquired from a previous visit, why?"

"I was just curious." I replied.

A previous visit? That must have been the 'My Little Dashie' crisis, just thinking about it again made me shudder.

Now I knew that the six were aware of the show, it made it a lot easier to use my computer without having to hide all the ponified stuff lying around, it would also make talking to Bruce less awkward for them. With that in mind, I double clicked on Skype and waited for it to open.

"So what else did Celestia tell you about this place?" I asked.

"It's Princess, Celestia. She has a title, use it." Twilight snapped.

Well, Twilight's good mood didn't last long. Although, it was understandable that Twilight wanted the Princess's name to be spoken properly, as she was the ruler's prize student.
It was Rainbow Dash to answer my question, although it was barely an answer at all.

"She didn't say much in detail, she just told us is that we'll need you to guide us as it might be dangerous."

{Well, she got that right.}

"But I don't get it, why me?"

The cyan mare shrugged, for she did not know the answer; by the looks of the others, nopony knew.
Yet another mystery to be solved.

Skype made its usual popping noise to indicate it had booted up. I clicked on Bruce's profile, and then clicked on the message bar and began to type.

Callum: Hey broski! How are ya?

The ponies stared at the screen in confusion.

"I'm not seeing anything..." Twilight moaned.

"Wait for it..." I replied.

Bruce: CALLUM! *glomps*

The other ponies were amazed.

"So, those words, just came from some dude in another part of the world?" Dashie asked in awe.

"That would be correct." I smiled back.

"What is a glomps?" Rarity asked.

"It's sort of like a dive hug, I think..." Fluttershy quietly answered before I could speak.

I wasn't quite sure how she knew about glomping, perhaps the word existed in Equestria? I'd figure it out another time, but for the time being I got back down to business with Bruce.

Callum: Bro, can I ask a huge favour of you?

Bruce: Ugh, your favours are always costly. What is it now?

Callum: I need your help, kinda urgently actual.

Bruce: What do you mean? Callum, what have you done?

Callum: Can I just call you?

Bruce: Yeah, sure, I'm worried though...

"Okay girls, I'm about to hit this button here, and then he will be able to see me from here" I pointed to my webcam.

In the blink of an eye, Twilight darted away from the behind the computer, and while the others bunched up together, ready to greet my friend, however I felt it would help make things less complicated if he didn't know about the ponies.
The less people involved, the better, I just needed to get the dogs to safety and move on.

"To be fair, I think you lot should stay out of sight." I instructed.

Moaning in protest to my killjoy, the girls stepped to the side and watched from the side, still eager to see how Skype's video calling worked. Hitting the call button, Skype started ringing and in a few seconds, Bruce's face appeared on the screen.

"Right, talk to me, what the bloody hell have you done?"

Giving a heavy sigh, I didn't really know where to begin other than that I needed his help.

"I need to ask you a favour, a big one, and it needs to be kept between us."

"Callum, I'm not going on a date with you."

The girls lightly giggled and I quickly muted my microphone before he heard them.

"Dude, I'm joking, and you're really freaking me out, what is going on?"

Unmuting my mic, I told him that I needed him to look after my dogs as I'd be going away.

"That's it? Fuck sake Callum, you had me really worried!"

I winced slightly at the language, worried the girls would take offence, although they seemed relatively fine with it, despite a few concerning looks between one another.

"I don't think you understand, I'm going away, and I'm not coming back."

His cheesy grin was gone instantly and he froze, processing my words.

"What... What do you mean?" He eventually spoke.

"Look, can you take care of my dogs for a few days? Yes or no?"

"Well yeah, easily, I love Chilli and Archer to bits, but what do you mean you aren't coming back?"

"Can you come and pick me up? I'll explain in person." I told him.

"Well, my car's in the shop at the moment so I can't come to you, so you'll have to come to me, is that okay?"

Rolling my eyes, I was hoping he'd be able to just swing by and pick up the pooches and be done with it, but at least it wasn't too long of a walk.

"Roger that, I'll get walking then."

"Okay, alright, I... Um... Better clean up this place! Where to begin, uh, ah! Dog food, baskets..." He trailed off.

Knowing his mind was now on the dogs and wouldn't start questioning me until we were physically together, I said goodbye, to which he dipped his head and joked that he'd put the kettle on; I thanked him and said I'd be over as quickly as possible, and then hung up.

Emitting a heavy sigh, I turned to face the girls with a weak smile; it had been SO difficult not to tell Bruce about the girls, but the last thing I needed was him going apeshit over Skype when I just needed him to say yes about the dogs.

"Well that was awesome." Rainbow Dash stated with a grin.

"Heh, yeah that was Skype." I replied.

"That must have been very difficult for you, but I can definitely see how things would have become a whole lot more complex with us being on the camera." Rarity added, giving my shoulder a friendly pat.

"Indeed, now I just have to walk the dogs to his, it shouldn't be too long a walk. Out of interest though, is there a way of magically travelling back and forth between two spots?" I asked.

Rarity looked up from admiring her shiny, polished hooves.

"Well, now that you mention it, Twilight could generate a Pullie-Portal for you..."

Twilight instantly started shaking her head and started mouthing the word 'no'.

"A what?" I asked, completely ignoring Twilight.

Rarity went on to explain that a Pullie-Portal is a two-part spell that essentially worked like a boomerang; the first part of the spell would be cast onto me, making me the boomerang. At a later point in time, Twilight would then cast the second spell in front of her, teleporting me back to that point via a portal.

"That's... That's EPIC!" I exclaimed.

"Yeah it's certainly one of the more complex spells, I wouldn't be able to cast it to save my life..." Rarity agreed.

"So how are we going to get there?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"You're not going, Callum goes alone with the dogs and we will wait for him." Twilight ordered.

"What?!"

Before Rainbow Dash could start a further argument, I backed up Twilight in suggesting that it would be safer and faster if I made my way alone while the girls packed up their camp and prepared to leave.

"Then how's Twilight gonna know when to pull you back?" Dashie retorted.

Rarity cleared her throat as if to silence the lot of us.

"I do believe that you are all forgetting that there are two unicorns here. How about I accompany Callum, so that I can ping Twilight a quick signal when we're ready to return."

"Nice thinking Rarity!" I praised.

Rolling her eyes in annoyance, Twilight gave a small huff to herself.

"Ugh, if it gets us out of here any sooner, then fine."

I looked at the others, and to be honest, I was perfectly ready to go now if I could, now that I knew the dogs would be safe, I was ready to leave this hell hole without a second thought.

"When we finish trashing this place, we could head off right away; what do you girls think?" I asked.

"No objection here." Rainbow Dash muttered.

The others all nodded in agreement.

"Awesome, in that case, I believe it's time to get a move on."

"So, what happens now?" Applejack asked.

"Now?" I replied with the biggest grin ever, going over to the corner of my room to grab my cricket bat...

"LET'S ROCK THIS JOINT!"

Chapter Five: Dying to Live

Chapter Five: Dying to be Free

Crash!
"Oh yeah!"

Smash!
"Yee haw!"

Crunch!
"Woo! Hoo!"

*tap...*
"Yay."

All throughout the house, room to room; bash, smash, smack, crack and wallop. Glass was shattered, wood was splintered, and metal was bent, we trashed the house to hell.

"Oh my gosh, now this is what I needed!" I yelled while punching through the dining room window.

Applejack came through the hall and galloped past me, before bucking the kitchen door, breaking the bottom hinge.

"Yee haw! Buck yeah!" She yelled.

I laughed wildly as I whacked the lounge T.V with my brother's cricket bat, I jumped back in mild shock as the damn thing made a loud bang and sprayed me with sparks. Rarity, whom was next to me, chuckled at the scene, before looking to the ground solemnly.

"I must admit that I feel terribly guilty about breaking things that I don't own..." She started.

I was about to give a response, when she unexpectedly levitated a glass jug with her telekinesis, and then proceeded to forcefully launch it across the room and into the wall, smashing it to hundreds of tiny pieces.

"But oh, by Celestia, I love it!"

We both burst into child-like laughter and exchanged a short hug, still giggling loudly. We then continued to trash the house with the others; oh, it felt so good to break all this stuff, it was so wrong, yet it felt so right.
Since my dad left, and the abuse had begun, my young brain had been contorted and tormented by the abrupt and unfair treatment. Mixed with my natural teenage hormones, a vicious fire had formed within me, burning with an emotional rage, and it had been slowly growing for years, and it was time to set the house ablaze with it.

"Take this you mysterious evil voodoo box!" Pinkie Pie screamed as she head butted the kitchen microwave at full strength, making it quite literally explode; sparked were showered in all directions and Pinkie yelped loudly, jumping back about ten feet with a slightly singed mane.

"The voodoo box is spicy! The voodoo box is spicy!" She squealed, running away into another room.

At this, Rainbow Dash fell to the floor laughing like a nutcase, snorting a few times as she did so.

"Pinkie! You absolute nutcase, you're insane!"

Gasping for air, Rainbow was belly laughing so hard that she could barely breathe.

"Why was it a voodoo box exactly?" I chuckled to Pinkie.

"Well duh, it cooks food with glowing voodoo waves!"

"That's called radiation, Pinks, micro waves to be specific."

"That's what it wanted you to think, Callum!"

Although I found her to be utterly hilarious, I was rather worried that Pinkie had given herself an electric shock, but she seemed somewhat okay by her standard. After that little stunt of hers, I had to compete with her in order to create the biggest ruckus possible.
I slowly approached the French windows in the dining room, an absolutely enormous pane of double-glazed glass that stood over six feet high and eight feet wide; the others watched me with great anticipation, eager to witness what I was going to do next.

Tilting my head low and pointing at the window with a hostile glare, and in that very instant, Pinkie Pie knew exactly what to do.

"This is blasphemy, this is madness!" She shouted defensively, impersonating the Persian almost too accurately.

"Madness...?" I muttered to myself.

I looked round to face the others, I then glanced at Pinkie, who gave me the little nod of approval, somehow she knew the reference, it must have been Pinkie logic, there was no other explanation.

I turned back to the window, and glared at it with the fierce intent to destroy it.

"This! Is! Sparta!"

Raising my knee up to my chest, I kicked out at the giant pane of glass with all my might, shattering it into at least a million pieces; the entire pane screeched with dying agony, it was nearly comparable to a cannon going off in terms of volume. Each tiny little fragment twinkled faintly in the light and made a crystalline 'ching' noise at it hit the floor; and due to the never-ending number of uncountable pieces, there was a lot of 'chinging'. It easily took half a minute for the slaughter to fall silent.
After that, everything went silent, nopony spoke, it seemed that they weren't even breathing, one could have heard the scratching of a wasp crawling on a window pane...

It turned out to be Rainbow Dash who spoke first.

"Yo, dude... That... Was... ... Awesome!" She yelled, giving a fan-girl squeal.

All the other ponies burst into cheering, Pinkie reared up and kicked her forelegs around in excitement.

"OhmygoshCallumyou'resocoolthatwaslike, soooooooooo amazing!!!!"

Even Fluttershy gave her famous little, 'woo-hoo'.

All good things come to an end eventually, and as expected, it just so happened to be Twilight to cut the lights on the party.

"Is your kind always this intent on destruction?" She asked, giving me a dull look.

Everypony looked round at her with dull expressions of their own, Twilight then continued.

"Are your kind also usually that foolish? Sending broken glass all over the place like that could have seriously injured somepony, I wouldn't be surprised if you were hoping to cut someone with such a reckless act!"

Hanging my head, I accepted that it was a rather stupid thing to have done; meanwhile Fluttershy had something to say for once in regard to her cruel accusations.

"Now Twilight, I know you're feeling stressed, and are most probably very tired, which can make anypony a bit grouchy, but come on now... No one was harmed, and Callum was only playing."

Then Rarity joined in.

"Fluttershy's right Twilight, you are taking this whole ordeal further than it needs to go. Listen-"

"No!" Twilight barked, interrupting Rarity. "You listen! You don't understand what is truly going on here, you don't know what these things are really like!" She snarled, pointing a hoof at me.

Rarity gasped, horrified at Twilight objectifying me as a 'thing'.
I remained in quiet observation, while somewhat offended, I wanted to see if Twilight would give me a clue to what Celestia had divulged to her, because whatever it was, it wasn't all that nice, to put it lightly.

"How dare you address Callum in such a manner!" Rarity shouted, "We may not have known him for long but-"

"But nothing!" Twilight growled back, "Humans are wicked on the inside, they're full of hate and lust for war! This whole nicey nicey business is just a facade!"

{Some progress...} I thought to myself, I supposed Celestia must have told her about the world wars.

"Hey! He's not evil!" Pinkie piped up, "If he was, my Pinkie senses would be going all twitchy twitch, twitcha twitch!"

"I don't care about your Pinkie Sense, I know he's bad on the inside! Princess Celestia said so!"

Twilight was getting herself into a state now, she clearly didn't realise how delusional she appeared before everyone. Obviously Celestia's word was gospel to her, but now she was clearly obsessing on it.
Choosing to insert myself into the situation, I calmly asked what it was that Celestia had specifically said about me, and why it had drawn Twilight to the conclusion that I was undeniably evil.
Despite my politeness, I received only a glare from the unicorn.

"It's none of your business!"

"Actually, I think it is my business, seeing as it's about me and my species."

Having raised my volume a tad, Twilight looked up to me and the dominance amongst us began to shift.
Before she could speak, I continued.

"Look, if we're going to get along, you're going to have to tell me what Celestia's said to you. Because from how you're behaving, she's most likely given you false information, or at least heavily exaggerated."

Her intense glare became even more furious, she even bared her teeth. Something was clearly wrong with her, this wasn't just excessive tiredness, there was a much deeper mental issue going on here.

"You dare say that Princess Celestia is wrong?" She barked.

"If she's outright told you that we're evil, then yes, yes I do."

Uh oh... Bad move...

Somewhere in Twilight's mind, something very brittle just snapped.
In her eyes, I'd just committed the worst crime of all, treasonous blasphemy. She looked up to Princess Celestia like both a parent, and as a literal god, her mentor couldn't possibly be wrong in her eyes, if Celestia said so, it had to be true. Merely suggesting the ruler could be wrong ignited a raging inferno within her in no time at all. Pinkie Pie's head rotated from facing Twilight, to me slowly, in an almost robotic manner.

"Oooooooohhh golly..." She said quietly, wincing while she spoke.

Her left eye twitching, Twilight's anger came to a threshold and finally erupted.

"You, you... You vile! Twisted! Monster!" She bellowed at me, before storming out of the doorway that I had just shattered.

Gobsmacked, the other ponies stood there in silence, until eventually a shocked Rarity began to stride after her in an attempt to scold her.

"What did you just call h-"

"Rarity, please drop it." I interrupted.

Rainbow Dash darted forward and stood beside Rarity in protest.

"But-"

"But, nothing, I don't want any more arguments." I stopped her.

I had tried to get information out of Twilight, and it had failed; now I just wanted things to settle down so we could embark on the mission. I'd try to probe her for intel at a later date.
I turned to Applejack and gave a weak smile.

"AJ, it seems that you're quite good when it comes to getting through to her. Would you mind talking to her please?"

"I can try, Sugarcube, but don't be expecting any miracles here, I ain't no therapist." She said with a nod.

Tipping her hat and hopping out of the shattered doorway, Applejack headed off to find Twilight.
Groaning loudly with anger, Rainbow Dash stomped her hoof onto the wooden floor.

"Well this is just perfect! Twilight's once again started a civil war!"

"This isn't some toddler tantrum going on Rainbow Dash, this is something serious." I replied.

Beckoning everyone closer, I gathered the remaining four ponies into a little huddle around me.

"Look girls, Twilight is really struggling, obviously. She's well out of her comfort zone, and the Princess has very evidently told her some very sinister things about this world. Now, I am not going to lie to any of you, this is world isn't perfect, not by a long-shot, and some of what Celestia has told Twilight, could very well be true.
The problem here is that Twilight has associated such things with me personally, she thinks I'm the one that's bad; and there's no use trying to persuade her that I'm good, not yet anyway. We just need to accept the fact that she doesn't like me, all we can do is progress through this mission and do our best to avoid these sorts of conflicts."

Frowning, Rainbow Dash looked like she was going to object, but I continued speaking before she could do so.

"This mission, is indeed dangerous, as Twilight rightfully mentioned, but danger is different from harm.
Danger means that harm is possible, while harm implies that you are actually being hurt.
This quest may lead us to danger, which I cannot prevent, but I can, and will keep you from harm."

Judging from the positive facial expressions now around me, explaining the situation had made everyone feel somewhat calmer and safer. What's more, is that I had managed to discreetly change the subject from Twilight, whom in all honesty, I was trying to back up. I didn't quite know why I was on Twilight's side, I guess I felt sorry for her?
Either way, I had to make peace with her, somehow...

Our group huddle had just dispersed when Applejack finally returned.

"Well, I've calmed her down to the best of my ability, but I can tell you sure as eggs, she don't like you one bit..."

"Tell us something we don't know, AJ." Rainbow Dash groaned.

Ignoring Rainbow's remark, I dipped my head in kindness.

"Thank you Applejack, as long as she's calm and focused on the mission, that's all the matters. If she chooses to hate me, then so be it, all I care about is helping you six. All I want is your safety, and I will go to all lengths to make sure of that, I will ensure you succeed in this mission no matter the cost, even if it means your hatred in the end, for whatever reason. Because knowing that I've helped you all get back home, and protect Equus, is more important."

At that, Rarity sniffed and looked away.

"Oh Callum, that is just, beautiful... Selfless too! Even if Twilight never does, I can see now why the Princess sent us to you. You have a pure heart, a real gentleman."

{Pfft, drama queen, I was only speaking the truth.} I thought to myself.

"Ooooooooohh, sounds like someone's got a crush." Rainbow Dash sneered.

Scoffing loudly, Rarity was taken off-guard and a tad insulted, (although mostly just embarrassed), I personally found it amusing as it was perfectly clear that Dashie was teasing, but Rarity took it the wrong way.

"Rainbow Dash, shame on you!"

"Alright, alright, settle down, let's not have anypony else falling out now, Twilight is enough." I interjected, chuckling.

They did as I asked and sat down, to which I continued.

"Right then, as we've now trashed the house, our time is limited. We need Twilight to generate the clone, and for him to be killed, then we need to get the dogs to Bruce, then we are ready to hit the road."

Fluttershy took a step away from me, taken aback.

"K-Kill the clone?"

Confirming that I did intend to kill the clone, I explained that faking my death had to look real, as though someone had broken into the house and killed me. Fluttershy looked at her hooves, unsure of what to say; the others were all somewhat similar, they didn't really know how to conduct themselves with such a subject.

"Callum dear, are you absolutely sure about this?" Rarity asked, rather nervously.

Honestly, no, I wasn't sure about this; as I thought over the matter, I thought perhaps it was too much, what if I just wrote a suicide note and vanished without a trace? But then people would search for my body, it would end up as a permanently unsolved investigation as to where I'd gone.
No, generating and then killing a clone was necessary, if there was just a body with no evident cause of death, there would be large investigations, with an alarming autopsy that would lead to further speculations and who knows what else to follow. I just wanted this escape from my life to be smooth with no risks, and I even Twilight would agree with that.
Besides, we'd already trashed the house, so there was no turning back now. On top of that, this was a non-sentient clone we were talking about, it would have no thoughts, pain, or emotion.

"Well, I hope you're not expecting me to stick around when it happens."

{Holy crap, did they all think that they had to watch my do it?} I thought to myself, before speaking my mind.

"Oh goodness no Rarity, I never intended for you to see it happen, none of you!"

"Well, um, I don't mind," Rainbow Dash stated anxiously, "I mean, we may have to kill one day in the future..."

I whipped around to look at her, scowling with a face like thunder.

"You are not watching, none of you are, okay? And don't say things like that either, don't even think about killing, ever! The whole purpose of my job is to keep you away from such things, understand?"

My sudden change in attitude frightened her some; I was genuinely angry with her, how on Earth could she have even suggested having to kill, it was nothing like the Dash I knew.
But then again, how well did I truly know these ponies? I've known who they are since the first season aired, all the way up until present day while Season Three was airing, and yet there was far more to them that met the eye.

"S-Sorry..." She stuttered, "I just-"

"You just, nothing." I cut in, "There is nothing good, nor heroic about killing, it's taking away life. That is all."

Shame befell the pony as she understood the severity of her words, bowing her head, she sighed heavily; within the blink of an eye, I had forgiven her, how could I not? I had only met the six just yesterday, this was all still fresh, I was still buzzed just for knowing of their existence, staying angry at any of them was simply impossible at this point.
I exhaled slowly through pursed lips, it was time to get this done, facing Applejack, I decided that it would be best for her to retrieve Twilight, and not me.

"Applejack, I think that it's time, can you fetch Twilight?"

She nodded, and left without saying anything; I turned to the others to find them all suddenly look very saddened.

"You girls okay?"

"I suppose so," Rarity answered, "it's just that with all this talk of death and whatnot, I can't help but fear for what's going on back home in Equestria, I'm just feeling a bit homesick."

The others were evidently dwelling on the same subject, for they all wore similar expressions.

"I'm worried about my little Angel Bunny..." Fluttershy sniffed.

The poor things, they were a very long way from home, and they were going to be for a long time, it made perfect sense for them to have home on their minds.
That's when a realisation dawned upon me, when I had read the fanfiction 'My Little Dashie', the time between our worlds were distorted, an entire year in our world was merely a day in theirs, we had months, possibly even a couple of years to look for the orb shards. Right now in Equestria, no more than a few seconds had passed since the girls stepped through the portal. I smiled at this thought, I looked to the others, beaming.

"I know it feels like you've been away for a long time, and you will be here for quite a while, but I know a little something about the connection between our worlds."

Rainbow Dash tilted her head, the others did the same.

"As it happens," I continued, "a single day in Equestria is a whole year in this world. Back in Equestria, the lot of you have barely been gone a minute."

"And how, do you know that?" A shrill, disgruntled voice spoke from behind me.

I turned to face Twilight, whom quickly used her magic to open her saddlebag and levitate a scroll from it. Before I could speak, she unravelled the paper and read it aloud for us all to hear.

"My dear Twilight,

Due to a previous occurrence that I cannot divulge to you at this given time, I have come to understand that the working of time is different between Earth's dimension and that of our own.
For an unknown reason that even I cannot explain, a full year in their world is but a single day in ours; fortunately, this fractured time very much plays into our advantage, as your company will have far more time to search for the Titan's Orb.

I have every faith in you.

Good luck, my faithful student.
Princess Celestia."

The others looked at Twilight, then to me, then to Twilight again.

"How did you get hold of my notes?" She asked through gritted teeth.

I looked back at her calmly.

"I didn't, I know about it from elsewhere."

"Where then?"

I broke eye contact to glance at the others, whom were now looking at me as intently as Twilight, also curious as to how I'd obtained such knowledge, especially considering that I didn't know of their existence until yesterday.
But if Celestia had wiped their memories, I was confident that she had done so for a good reason, and so I reluctantly had to lose some of the trust I'd been able to develop over the past twenty-four hours.

"I can't tell you." I answered.

"And why is that?"

That's when something clicked in my mind, I could use this to my advantage...
Twilight very much wanted to know what I knew, and I in turn needed to know what she knew; funny that both pieces of information related back to the Princess.
With a sly biting of my lower lip, I smirked at the unicorn.

"Well Twilight, it seems that we're at a bit of a compromise. I would very much like to know what Princess Celestia told you about me and my planet. And you want to know what I know. Would you like to trade information?"

"Don't you dare blackmail me," She snarled, "I am her student, it's completely within my right to withhold the information that she's given me in relevance to this mission!"

I merely shrugged.

"And I'm well within my right to withhold my own information, as it does not impede our objective."

She growled in frustration, desperate to know of my source.

"I'm telling you nothing." She spat.

"So be it, if you don't tell me, I won't tell you. Simple as that, Twilight."

Before she could argue further, I broke the argument by telling her that I was ready to relocate the dogs and embark, and her piercing gaze instantly became less intense. She finally entered the room, opposed to standing in the broken doorway, and put her note from Celestia back into her saddle bag.

"How far away is this friend of yours?" She asked.

"About a half-hour walk, but I'll try to get there a little faster." I answered.

"You do that."

Ignoring her dull remark, I told her that I wanted to be absolutely sure of the address and quickly dashed through the kitchen, into the hall, up the stairs, and into my bedroom. Luckily my laptop was still on, (it was one of the few things I hadn't destroyed), I quickly opened up Google Earth and typed in the address that I believed to be correct, the globe rotated as it zoomed in on the house, I chuckled as I saw Bruce in his garden, semi-nude, lying in a deck chair, luckily Google Earth had taken the satellite photograph at just the perfect time, (needless to say, it was definitely the right place).
I rushed back downstairs and into the dining room.

"Right, I'm a hundred percent sure where the place is."

"Would it be too much to ask if I could come along as well? I'd very much like to meet Bruce." Fluttershy requested.

"Oh sure, sure. Hey, how about everypony goes and we call get caught?" Twilight spat sarcastically.

"Oh Twilight, do shut up." Rarity deadpanned, rolling her eyes.

"Ugh, fine then, three Pullie-Portals and two cloaking spells. What are we going to do first? Deal with the clone business here, or get your dogs to your friend?" Twilight asked.

I looked around, not quite sure of what I should do. Rainbow Dash was the first to speak up.

"I think you should take care of the clone, it'd be better to get it out of the way."

Seems like Dashie had learned her lesson. The others nodded, and we all agreed that it would be for the best, if we took care of the clone first, we could all leave and never have to come back here.

"Very well," Twilight said, "let's do this in the kitchen, as there are knives there. It would appear like you reached for one to defend yourself against your attacker, but weren't fast enough, it will look more realistic."

As rude and arrogant as Twilight had been, she was very observant, if only she were to use her head like that and be nice at the same time, that'd be a treat.
Rarity anxiously stepped forward and made her thoughts known.

"Twilight, Callum, how exactly are you going to deal with this clone? Obviously it's agreed that Callum is to kill it, but do you mean to... To actually... Kill it?"

"Well, duh, how else are we going to make it look realistically dead? Casually nail a sign to him that says 'dead guy'?"

Twilight levitated an orange out of the kitchen fruit bowl, along with a kitchen knife from the rack. Looking at me with a dull expression, she drove the knife into the orange and twisted it, splitting the fruit open.

"You know what to do." She muttered.

I shrugged and snatched the knife from her telekinetic hold. When she put it that way, stabbing the clone didn't seem so bad, it was just like a piece of fruit, like the orange, right?

"Let's get this done..." I said.

Twilight nodded and walked towards me, her horn glowing; the same purple stream of light began to escape from my body, the same purple ball of light formed in front of me, and just like last time the ball began to stretch out into the shape of a human. With a white flash, there stood a clone of me, but there was something different about this one, he had no facial expressions whatsoever, his eyes were glassy and unblinking, it was as though he were already dead.

"Get it done, and get it done quickly, I don't want to be in this house anymore. For all we know, your mother could be back at any moment." Twilight ordered.

While I knew that my mother wouldn't get back for at least another four hours, (as it was only midday), I decided not to argue the toss with her, for I wanted to get out of here as well. The others left the room, but I quickly stopped Twilight upon her exit.

"This clone won't feel anything, right?"

"No, this clone is a much simpler version in order to conserve my mana, he has no emotion, or functioning nervous system, he's basically a vegetable, or an orange for that matter."

Assured by her answer, I allowed her to leave and picked up the knife, before facing the clone as Twilight closed the door behind me.
It was time to do the deed.

"Okay, it's just like an orange, it's just like an orange..." I mumbled to myself.

I walked right up to the clone and waved my had in front of his eyes, to which he didn't react; after poking him with my finger a few times, I forced myself to accept that he wasn't real.

{Okay, he's just like an orange.} I thought to myself, my hands already sweating.

My fingers trembled like leaves in the wind, clinging onto their branch for dear life, and the knife's blade gleamed in the kitchen light as though a small star were dancing upon it.

{Come on Callum, it's just a piece of fruit, a human shaped fruit...}

A thought most useful then entered my mind, as a child I once went to a theme park called Thorpe Park, and there was a rollercoaster named Stealth, I remember being absolutely terrified of it at first, and I found that the only way to get over it, was to simply throw myself onto it without thinking. Now, I knew that getting onto a rollercoaster was slightly different to stabbing oneself, but it was the same principle, I had to do it without thinking.
Closing my eyes, and holding the knife tightly, I took a deep breath and then lunged at the clone as hard as I could without a moment to consider the action.

There was a small thud as the knife went into the clone's gut, I gave it a twist and then pulled the blade out, and he fell to the floor with a loud smack as his head collided with the oven handle behind him as blood poured out of him. The knife too was dripping with the stuff, along with a small amount on my fingers and on my palms, I momentarily felt like I was going to be sick, I dropped the knife and ran to the sink to wash off the thick, sickening liquid.

Although I wasn't sick, my mouth began to salivate heavily as though I were going to be, it took me a good minute to regain my senses properly and get a hold of myself.

{It's done... It's done... Let's get the hell out of here.} I thought, almost saying it aloud.

Leaving the kitchen and closing the door behind me, I found the others patiently waiting on the other side, their expressions became lightly sunken with sorrow upon seeing me.

"Callum?" Rarity asked, her eyes full of worry. "Are you okay?"

I tried to talk, but couldn't, it appeared that I was in more shock than expected, so much in fact that it seemed as though I had gone mute, but I managed a nod.

"Good, now let's go," Twilight ordered, "We're done here and won't stay a moment longer."

"Twilight, show some respect for Pete's sake! You can see clear as apples that he's in shock!"

Biting her bottom lip in an attempt to stifle an argument, Twilight exhaled through her nose heavily in irritation..

"T-Twilight's right, we sh-should go." I stuttered, finally able to find some words in my throat.

I grabbed my rucksack and slung it over my shoulder before anypony could say otherwise. Chilli's little stump tail was wagging frantically as she loved going on walks; t'was a shame that this would be the last walk I'd ever have with her...

Opening the back door and walking outside, I took in a breath of cool air before stepping out into the sunlight; the weather was lush today, there was no wind and barely a cloud in the sky. Applejack came over to give Archer a last goodbye, stroking the deerhound's neck and giving him a gentle hug.

"This here's a fine pooch, I wish Equestria had these deerhounds, I could see myself having two of them guarding the farm." She chuckled.

Despite my breath still being rather shaky, I was able to maintain enough focus to respond.

"Well depending on how things turn out over our journey, perhaps you could head home with a couple of deerhound pups of your own?" I suggested.

"Heh, I'd very much consider that, Sugarcube!"

Tipping her hat, she went to help the others in packing up their camp.

"You know the ping spell, yes?" Twilight asked to Rarity.

"For the millionth time, yes Twilight. You've planted your own memory of the inscription into my head at least six times now, I've got it okay, darling?" The white mare replied, rolling her eyes playfully.

Twilight nodded, and her horn began to glow, flickering like a road flare. An immense heat started to surround my body, it was so hot that it was almost painful, I gritted my teeth and prepared for whatever sensation came next.

It was then when then my vision was replaced with the purest white I'd ever seen.

Chapter Seven: The Adventure Begins

Chapter Seven - An Unexpected Journey

"So what's it going to be everyone? Chimicherry? Or Cherrychanga? Chimicherry? Cherrychanga? Chimicherry? Cherrychanga? Chimicherry? Cherrychanga?" Pinkie asked over and over again to the group as we walked through a patch of woodland.

"Will somepony please make her stop?" Rarity moaned.

We'd been walking for about forty minutes and Pinkie's boredom had sent her into a spree of annoying questions, with her current one being the infamous 'Chimicherry or Cherrychanga?' puzzle.
Thankfully the answer wasn't actually that difficult, I snapped my fingers next to catch Pinkie's attention, to which she froze like a statue for a few seconds; bouncing into the air and turning a perfect hundred-and-eighty degrees, the pink pony stared at me with big bulging eyes, eager for an answer.

"Well, did you make up your mind?" She asked, beaming.

"I did indeed, the answer is Chimicherrychanga." I answered with a grin.

Emitting a squeal of delight, she bounced into the air once more and confirmed that I was correct. After bouncing a few more times, she joyfully pranced alongside the group and contently hummed to herself, relenting in her nonsensical riddles.
Rarity approached me on my left and quizzed me as to how in Equestria I'd been able to figure it out.

"It's actually quite simple if you think about it." I replied.

I went on to unravel the puzzle, explaining that cherry was at the end of Chimi, but also the start of Changa; the whole ordeal was a simple matter of putting the two words together, resulting in Chimicherrychanga.
The others hummed and mumbled to themselves as they finally understood Pinkie's incredibly weird and incredibly pointless little riddle.

From the back of the group Twilight's dull voice called out to me, without the mare even bothering to face me.

"Callum, we are heading north, I thought we were supposed to be going north east."

"Don't worry, I know where we're going." I responded, "If we were to go directly northeast, we'd end up in an urban area, plenty of houses with plenty of watchful eyes. By heading north and sticking to the Ifield Brook until we reach a the River Mole, and then head east, we can stay well hidden in the woods."

"Fine." Twilight huffed, "But if we get lost, it's your fault."

Choosing not to respond, I walked along in silence until Fluttershy chose to speak up.

"What's the River Mole?"

"Oh, it's just a really big river." I answered.

"Are there moles there?"

"Not a clue." I laughed.

We continued to make our way through the woods, we were making good progress.

"So, where is this place we're headed again?" Applejack asked.

Now at the front of the group, I had successfully kept us concealed within the woodland and were close to the river.

"It's called Gatwick Airport, a hub for aeroplanes that allow us to travel by air. The energy spike that Twilight picked up is most probably due to all the electronic equipment." I answered.

"Aero-what now?" Applejack quizzed.

"Aeroplanes, they're gigantic flying contraptions that take people to other parts of the world. Imagine a massive metal bird, but ten times bigger, hollow on the inside, and made of metal." I clarified for her.

"Preposterous! If they were made of metal, they'd never be able to fly; they would be far too heavy." Twilight scoffed.

Turning around to face Twilight, I continued to walk backwards without looking where I was headed.

"What if such a contraption was streamlined, and had two fixed wings on either side to aid the lift-to-drag ratio?"

Biting her bottom lip and thinking for a split second, she protested that an aeroplane would need to be consistently propelled forward for it to work, which she deemed 'impossible without magic'.
After pretending to be stumped for a second, I gave the unicorn a patronising gasp and placed a hand over my mouth.

"Oh, I must have forgot to mention that aeroplanes have massive, high propulsion jet engines either side of them, propelling them forward at extreme speeds for the entire duration of the flight."

"You could have just told me that to start with, instead of being a dick about it." She muttered under her breath.

I turned back to look where I was going, and continued to walk with a proud strut, admittedly very chuffed that I'd been able to educate Twilight during a disagreement.

"Where did someone like you even learn about the lift-to-drag ratio?"

"Well believe it or not Twilight, you aren't the only living thing in the universe that knows science; the subject is mandatory in our education system, and quite extensively too." I explained.

Much to my surprise, Twilight slowly emerged from her defensive shell and actually started to converse with me about science, quizzing me on certain subjects I'd learned in secondary school. While I was certain it wouldn't last forever, I was thankful to just chat with her normally for once.
After a decent few moments of talking, the sound of a car horn in the distance switched her back into defensive mode, and we found ourselves walking in silence yet again, besides Pinkie, who quietly hummed the Parasprite Polka to herself.

"So Callum, this has been on my mind for a while now; what's it like being a human?" Rainbow Dash asked out of the blue.

"What do you mean?" I replied, unsure of what she was actually asking.

The pegasus grew surprisingly shy, as though she felt stupid for asking, regardless she continued with her query.

"Well, what's it like always standing on two legs and needing to keep your balance? What's it like with no fur to keep you warm at night? Oh, and how in Equestria do you work those hand thingies of yours?"

I smiled, and coughed, trying to think of something to say.

"Well, with standing on two legs, it just comes naturally to you, it's like how chickens walk on two legs, or a better example, Twilight's assistant, Spike; they walk on two legs with ease; it's the same thing really.

As for my hands, it's pretty much the same way your wings work." I said as I slowed down to walk beside Dash.

"Now, if I raise one of my fingers like so," I demonstrated by pointing out my index finger, "that's the same and you raising this set of feathers here." I lightly pushed the area on her wing that I was referring to.

She made that part of her wing flex up just like my finger had, I continued this explanation by curling my hand into a fist, and in turn, Dashie's entire wing bawled up.

"I get it, that's awesome!" She giggled as she constantly closed and opened her wings, along with wiggling them about.

I looked behind me to see Applejack, Pinkie, Fluttershy and Rarity all bunched up together, listening to me intently, even Twilight had her ears perked up to pick up what I was saying. They were more curious about humans than I thought; I knew Twilight would be interested, as she's into science and all that, but I didn't think the other five would be as well.

About half an hour passed in the blink of an eye, I walked in silence as I listened to Rarity talking with Fluttershy about fashion, Pinkie Pie making a spot on prediction to the story line for the second Kung Fu Panda movie to Rainbow Dash, while Applejack tried, and failed, to make Twilight lighten up. Ahead of us, I finally found what I was looking for.

"Here we are folks, the River Mole." I announced to the others.

It was quite a wide river, definitely not jump-able, and it was quite deep. It had quite a current to it, I was a good swimmer and could just about manage it, but I highly doubted the others would make it without a struggle.

"Right, this'll be easy, Fluttershy and I can just lift you lot over one by one." Rainbow Dash suggested.

"Or one of you two could teleport us over?" Applejack said, pointing to Rarity and Twilight.

"I can't, I'm still re-charging after teleporting from Bruce's house." Rarity said and she rubbed her horn.

"Twi?" Applejack asked.

She turned her head from Applejack and strutted over to Rainbow Dash.

"I'm saving all my magic for this Airport so I can use the spell to find the shards, Rainbow Dash will have to carry us over, as she suggested in the first place." She said in a military-like tone.

"Cool." Dashie said casually, stretching her wings. "I can do it on my own Fluttershy, just cross. I've got it"

I smiled at that; I knew Fluttershy was a weak flyer, but in the show there had been a number of times where that wasn't taken into account. It was nice that Rainbow Dash had considered her weakness.
The butter coloured pegasus slowly flapped across the river as she was told, and patiently waited on the other side.

"Me first! ME first!" Pinkie bounced up and down.

Rainbow Dash put her hooves under Pinkie's forelegs and lifted her across.

One by one, all the ponies were across safely.

"Callum, you're up." Dashie said when I was the only one left.

I shrugged and put out my arms, but I had a very good feeling that I would be too heavy for her. My prediction turned out to be correct.

"Mother of Celestia, how much do you weigh?" She said after just being able to lift me a few centimetres of the ground.

"Eighty five kilograms." I replied.

"Fatty." She smirked back.

"I'll have you know that most of it is muscle, plus I'm big boned." I snorted.

"I'll believe it when I see it." The blue mare sneered.

I stuck my tongue out at her, as I didn't have a good comeback, which was rather annoying as her comment actually stung quite a bit, but I'd let it go as I knew she was joking.

"How are we going to get you across then?" Dashie asked.

I looked a little further upstream to see an oak tree with a nice big branch that quite conveniently stretched all the way across the river.

"I'll show you," I grinned, "hold my bag."

I took off my rucksack and gave it to Rainbow Dash, then jogged over to the tree. Upon getting there it turned out that the branch was higher up than I thought, but that wasn't a problem to me. I took a few steps back, and then ran at the tree, I leapt at the trunk and launched myself further up with a wall jump, I grabbed one of the branches and pulled myself up; I then manoeuvred through the tree until I was standing on the right branch.
I looked at Rainbow Dash to find her staring at me with her mouth wide open; I looked across the river to find they were all staring at me just as intently as Dash.

Without warning, I dropped myself beneath the branch so I was hanging from it; as I did so all the ponies gasped, which made me chuckle. With a few swings to get my momentum going, I transitioned across the branch with a simple 'one hand in front of the other' method. When I got to the other side I detached from the branch with a big swing, and did a roll when I landed, just to ensure that I looked awesome.

"Aaaalrighty then, where were we?" I smiled.

All the ponies were in awe; even Twilight had her eyebrows raised.

"So... So... Awesome..." Rainbow Dash breathed quietly from behind me.

"Callum, are you a professional athlete by any chance?" Rarity said, finally finding words.

"Pfft, I'm far from being an athlete; I'm just used to climbing things." I replied, chuckling.

"There's climbing things, and then there's that!" Applejack exclaimed.

"Oh come on, it wasn't as amazing as you're making it out to be, all I did was swing across a tree branch." I said, grinning.

"Stop being so modest, that was quite an impressive feat you just pulled off; how did you not fall in the river? You were holding your entire weight with only your hands." Rarity asked.

"Uhh, strong hands, I guess." I shrugged.

"I want hands! I want hands!" Pinkie yelled in my ear.

I chuckled and ignored the fact I was now potentially deaf; I was going to say something silly about hands when my stomach grumbled, and that's when I realised that I hadn't eaten a thing all day since the salad I made, and I barely got a mouthful of that as I made it for the ponies and not myself, and I'm not even going to think about the cake that I cooked by myself, for myself, I didn’t even get a slice of it...

I headed over to Rainbow Dash and took my rucksack from her hooves; she said nothing, as she was still star struck from my tree climbing ability. I rolled my eyes as I opened my rucksack and took out a packet of Quavers.

"What's that you got there?" Pinkie asked, twisting her head so it was almost upside down, which in all honesty freaked me out a bit, even on Pinkie’s standards.

"Quavers." I replied, opening the plastic bag.

The second Pinkie caught a whiff of the cheesy goodness I knew she’d want one; she slowly edged her head towards mine, until her nose was almost touching mine.

"Callum?" She whispered.

"Yes?" I replied.

"Can I have one?"

I took out a single quaver and handed it to her; at first she politely took it with her hoof, but within a few seconds she had engulfed the crisp. She began to buzz and she let out a long mmmmmnn, and before you could say 'cheese' I was handing them out to each pony. They all loved the snack, besides Twilight who threw hers on the ground; it didn't go to waste though, as Pinkie slithered along the ground in inhaled it; I hadn't even eaten any and the packet was almost empty, looks like I was going to have to get my food out in secret from now on.

I ate the rest of the crisps before Pinkie could give me her puppy dog eyes in her attempt of getting more. I found it best that I didn't mention I had another nine packets in my rucksack. I opened one of the rucksack's many pockets and pulled out my compass. I made a mental bearing of which way East was, then put the compass away and put my bag onto my back and gave myself a little shake.

"Right, ready to go?" I asked.

The others all nodded, and so we headed off once more.

We were walking for about five minutes when I heard Applejack cry out.

"What in tarnation is that?"

I turned around to find Applejack looking into the air, I looked up to see and aeroplane flying up in the air, descending to a point ahead of us, a good sign.

"That's the creepiest looking bird I've ever seen. Like, ever." Rainbow Dash said with an eyebrow upraised.

"And it's the most normal looking aeroplane I've ever seen." I replied.

The ponies all gave an 'ahh' as they realised that this was one of the aeroplanes I was talking about before.
I turned around to find Twilight, gazing at the plane with great interest, studying it as much as she could; being as quick and quiet as possible, I slowed down and crept up behind her without her noticing.

“Not so preposterous now is it?” I said in a deep, stereotypical posh English accent.

Twilight jumped about three feet into the air and yelped; everypony else burst into laughter, leaving a very disgruntled Twilight.

“Shut up.” She growled as she turned her back and kept walking.

“Is it preposterous Twilight? Is it?” I asked in a patronising voice.

“Yes! It is!” She turned back at me, snarling, “Because that aeroplane, is not flying on its own, there is magic involved, so it isn’t flying!” She shouted.

“Now now Twiley, didn’t Princess Celestia tell you that there is no magic in this world?” I replied.

The other ponies were literally rolling on the floor in stitches at this point.

“Well there has to be! Otherwise that thing up there is not possible! And don’t you ever call me that again.” She growled.

Twilight was adamant that she was right, so I thought I’d better leave it for when we get to the airport to prove her wrong, as there was no convincing her through words. It also seemed that the nickname her brother gives her is going to be my new trigger word for annoying her, her teeth were gritted so hard you could hear them grinding!

“I really can’t be bothered with this, I’ll just show you when we get there,” I sighed, “I should have learned by now that arguing with you is… Preposterous.” I said, mimicking Twilight’s voice.

That set the others off again, and we all continued walking to the airport giggling.

So, it turns out that the airport was closer that I thought, and it wasn’t long before we came to the edge of the woodland, I could make out the flight tower in the distance across a large field, the runways were no less than a kilometre away.

“Is that it over there?” Rainbow Dash asked, who could see it better as she was hovering a few metres above the ground.

“Yup, that’s Gatwick Airport.” I replied.

Just as I say this, a jumbo jet glides over our heads and comes in to land, making us all jump; the sound was deafening, but I could just about hear Fluttershy screaming in fright. It took about ten seconds for the noise to die down, and when it did all the ponies were frozen solid. Fluttershy was lying down with her head in her hooves, cowering.

After a few seconds of pure silence, everypony stood up and gave themselves a little shake.

“What was that!?” Rainbow Dash shouted, rubbing her ears.

“Are you trying to get us killed?” Twilight yelled at me.

“Ok everypony, calm down… It was just an aeroplane coming in to land.” I said.

They simmered down as soon as I had explained; besides Twilight, who was having none of it.

“Oh sure it was! That was not landing, that was a blatant attempt to kill us!” She continued to yell.

At that, I couldn’t help but burst out laughing.

“An attempt…" I chuckled, "An attempt to-”

I burst into uncontrollable laughter once more

I took a huge gasp and wiped away a tear.

“Oh that slaps me on the knee!” I said in a Scottish accent.

Applejack and Rarity were chuckling, while Rainbow Dash was properly belly laughing.

“Twilight, you’ve made my day…” I said, still chuckling.

“I’m being serious!” She screamed at me.

“I know! That’s the best bit!” I cried out.

“Twilight dear,” Rarity put a hoof on Twilight’s shoulder, “even I’ve learned by now that not everything on this planet is hostile; some things may seem scary, but that does not necessarily mean that it’s bad.”

Twilight shook off Rarity and carried on walking, picking up her bitchy attitude once more.

“Well, I see his poisoned words have already gotten into your head.” She said through gritted teeth.

Rarity gasped, but I signalled for her to ignore the comment by shaking my head.

“Well then Twilight, we’d better get a move on before I slither into your head too.” I taunted.

I heard Rainbow Dash giggle from behind us at that comment. Twilight snorted in disgust then headed further towards the Airport.

“So, how close do you have to be to the airport to locate the first shard?” I asked.

“I’ve got nothing to say to you.” Twilight spat, not even looking at me.

I turned to Rarity.

“Rarity, be a lamb and ask Twilight how close she has to be to the airport to locate the first shard.” I said as I rolled my eyes.

Rarity sighed and asked Twilight.

“She says she needs to be at least five hundred metres from that tower.” Rarity said as she pointed to the flight tower.

“That’s rather risky; they have a lot of security here.” I replied.

“Why? Is there someone important there?” Rainbow Dash asked as she came up beside me.

I shook my head, and then went on to explain about how airports have to be under high security so people don’t sneak into other countries or get onto planes to cause chaos.

“You mean like Nine Eleven?” Pinkie called from the back.

I stopped dead. How in holy hell did she know about that? I shivered as I thought about the incident; so many deaths…
As these thoughts went through my head I felt some empathy towards Twilight’s mistrust.

“Yes, just like that. But how did you know about that?” I asked, still thinking about the terrible incident.

“I read it in one of your books, the one called ‘Earth’s worst moments’.” She replied.

{Crap… Why didn’t I hide that book?} I thought to myself.

“How much of that book did you read exactly?” I quizzed nervously.

“Oh, only the first two pages, it got boring as it didn’t have any colourful pictures in it so I threw it away and got another one.” She smiled.

I sighed a breath of relief at that, that book had the worst of the worst. It had the holocaust, the world wars, and the crusades. Pinkie was saved by her own innocence.

“Anyway, why do you need to be so close?” I asked Twilight, changing the subject.

After ten seconds of silence, I remembered Twilight’s current attitude and turned to Rarity and cleared my throat, I didn’t have to say anything.

“Apparently it will help her locate the shards better.” Rarity said.

“Well, we can’t get any further than that fence.” I said, pointing out an eight foot fence that was coated in barbed wire.

“Not close enough…” Twilight moaned.

“Well, if you want to cross the fence and risk being captured, go for it.” I replied.

She angrily growled something at me under her breath, what she said I couldn’t quite make out.

“Hey, I’m only protecting you here; you can still get a reading of the shards from the fence, but you can’t go any further than that, so use what you’ve got, and get us some results.” I ordered, trying to show some dominance without pissing her off any further.

We headed over to the fence, and Twilight closed her eyes.

“Give me space!” She barked.

The six of us backed away from Twilight and watched as her horn began to glow. The level of concentration in her face was intense; the spell Twilight was casting appeared to be a very powerful one.
A humming sound began to emit from all around us, and small sparks of blue energy began to appear here and there, it was like snow, but it floated up instead of down.

“Shiny lights!” Pinkie yelled.

Twilight’s horn got even brighter, it was almost blinding; the humming sound was getting louder as well, the bass was pretty powerful, I could feel the vibrations all around my body.
Suddenly, a purple lightning bolt fired from Twilight’s horn, and then the sound stopped along with the lights; Twilight sat there waiting.

“Now what?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Give me a second,” She said, “I need to wait a few seconds for the-”

There was a sudden crack as a blue lightning bolt shot down and hit Twilight, there was a flash of light and I was temporarily blinded; when I could see again, I rushed to Twilight’s side, who was on the ground, moaning.

“Twilight, are you ok?” I asked in a panic.

“I’m fine you dimwit, get your filthy hands off me.” She snapped as she stood up and steadied herself.

The others all crowded around her; Applejack was the one to speak.

“So, where are we headed?” She asked.

“I don’t know its name, I need a map.” Twilight replied.

I reached into my rucksack and took out my map of the world and opened it. I then took out a red marker pen and gave it to Twilight, who drew a small ‘X’ on the map.

“Where is that?” Twilight asked.

“Brazil.” I said.

“Well then, looks like we’re going to Brazil…”

Chapter Eight: Summer Plans

Chapter Eight - Planning a Summer Holiday

“Brazil?” I exclaimed, “How in the world are we going to get to Brazil?”

“There are two options,” Rarity started, “one, Twilight teleports us there, which is very inaccurate and will use up all her energy, meaning we’d be sent off course during the teleportation, we’d most likely be split up and we could end up in different countries entirely, or even in the ocean!”

“And the other option?” I asked.

“We use one of those.” Rarity replied, pointing behind me.

I turned around to see an aeroplane take off and ascend into the clouds.

“An aeroplane! Rarity, you’re a genius!” I cheered.

“No! She is not!” Twilight barked from behind me, making all six of us jump. “If anything, she’s an idiot for coming up with the idea!”

“How is that idiotic? It preserves your magic and it’s much safer than teleporting.” Rarity questioned, clearly offended by Twilight’s comment.
“Allow me to repeat what you said in a more realistic way,” Twilight said, strutting forward like an officer.

“How about we cross this fence, waltz into a populated area and get captured! That’s a great idea!” She shouted, acting as if she had a mental problem.

I tapped my chin; she had a point about crossing the fence, and it’d make me a bit of a hypocrite if I agreed with Rarity, as I literally just told them all not to cross the fence; but given these new circumstances that we had to get all the way to Brazil, I found it best that we take the risk, if Twilight were to cast an invisibility spell on us we should be able to sneak onto a plane with no problems.

“What if you used an invisibility spell?” I asked.

“It is still too dangerous, you said there were other humans on those aeroplanes.” Twilight replied.

She was right; there would be well over fifty people on each plane, possibly hundreds! But there had to be some way of getting them onto the plane without being detected… Then it hit me.

“How about the cargo hold?” I suggested.

“The what?” Rainbow Dash quizzed, pulling a slurred face as if she was drunk.

“The cargo hold is an area at the bottom of the aeroplane where people store all their luggage, but no one can get in there.” I answered.
“Why not?” Rarity asked.

“Because when the plane takes off, the change in pressure in the cargo hold is stronger, along with the temperature dropping massively.” I explained.

“Oh great, nice idea Callum, freeze us to death.” Twilight deadpanned.

“Hang on Egg Head,” Rainbow Dash said, “you’re a unicorn, don’t you have a spell that can bypass all that stuff?” She asked.

“That’s a good point, do you have a spell that reduces pressure?” I asked.

“And what about that really good heat spell you have?” Rarity asked, “What’s it called again…? Ah yes, Thermic Hide, that one would be very efficient.”

I pulled my head back and made a duck face with confusion; did Rarity just give a spell a name? Did spells have names? I just thought they were just, well, spells! How the hell did Twilight remember all of them if they all had names? It seemed that there was a lot about Equestria that I still had to learn…

“That spell is only in the case of us ending up in an arctic area; we are not getting on one of those aeroplanes!” Twilight growled.

“Since when did you become in charge?” Rainbow Dash challenged.

“Since Princess Celestia said I was in charge of this group before we came here!” Twilight snapped in response.

I almost laughed out loud at that, as much as Twilight was being unreasonable, she had a point there. But that’s when I found a flaw in her statement.

“As much as you are in charge of your group, the Princess also said that I was your guide, and that you are to listen to me, and I say that if the majority of us vote to get on the aeroplane, then that is what we’ll do.” I said.

She was stunned for a few seconds, unable to come back at me. Because Celestia has ordered her to listen to me, she was at a dilemma, she didn’t want to listen to me, but she couldn’t disobey Celestia.
Her nose scrunched up and she bared her teeth, her cheeks growing pink. She got angrier and angrier as she searched for a point to come back at me with; at this point she was so red that her face looked like a great big strawberry. She desperately tried to find a justifiable way to go against Celestia’s orders, but she found none.

“Fine!” She snapped as she growled like an agitated panther.

She turned around and began heading back to the woodland, I turned to the others and gave a toothy smile, at which they giggled. The fact that I could win in an argument with Twilight impressed them, I knew how Twilight could be, so it impressed me as well.

“So, when do we head over there and get on a plane then?” Rainbow Dash asked, eager for some action.

“I think it’s best that we make camp here, get a good night’s sleep. We’ll head out tomorrow.” I said.

As much as Dash was rather disappointed with my decision as she was eager for adventure, and to be honest, so was I, but I thought a night’s rest was in order. She accepted my choice with no complaint. It was getting into the late afternoon and I’d rather set off in the morning when we were all fresh.

“So, Rarity how does your portable camp work exactly?” I asked.

“Well, you see,” she started, “The tents and sleeping bags are all flattened and then shrunk down with magic, then it is easy to carry around and take where you like, when you take it out the bag, it deploys itself and expands to its normal size, you can then move the tents and the campfire to wherever you like. I can get it out and show you if you like?” She offered, reaching for one of the bags on her back.

“Sure!” I said, delighted to see more magic.

“To start with I’ll only deploy one tent so I don’t have to pack them all up again.” she said as she pulled out a miniature tent, no bigger than a DVD box.

She placed it on the ground and pulled on a little piece of string, as she did so the tent began to expand, it grew bigger and bigger, until it was around the same size as an average van. I was amazed by the sight, even though it was a simple tent, the way the magic worked just blew me away.

“Whoa, that’s cool…” I murmured.

“Pretty neat huh?” Rarity giggled.

“So, how do you shrink it again?” I asked.

“That’s the most difficult part, as it requires somepony to fold the tent in again, along with a unicorn to shrink it again, so if there isn’t a unicorn around, you’ll find yourself in quite a jam.” She explained.

“Wow, that’s really cool, here on Earth…” I stopped mid-sentence.

“Here on Earth what?” Rarity asked.

I quickly turned to her and put my finger to my lips.

“Sshh.” I went.

“I beg you pa-”

“Shush!” I interrupted her.

I tilted my head to one side, listening, and there it was, a sound that in most cases I would simply ignore, but as I heard it now it sent a shiver down my spine… A police siren.

“Crap…” I mumbled.

“What did you just s-”

“We’ve got to move, now!” I ordered, interrupting Rarity for a second time.

Twilight, who was a good fifty metres away, turned around.

“What is it?” She called over to me.

“We’ve got company!” I yelled back.

“What? You told us it was safe!” She screamed at me.

“Someone must have seen your lightning bolt!” I shouted, jogging towards her.

The others followed me quickly, nervously waiting for my next command.

“Twilight, I need you to cast a cloaking spell on us.” I instructed.

“Fine, but I won’t be able to sustain it with all seven of us, for some reason it takes a lot of magic to manipulate you, teleporting you used a lot more of my mana than usual.” She said.

“Don’t you think you could have told us that a little sooner?” I asked, frustrated.

“I didn’t think it would be necessary to tell-”

“We don’t have time for this!” Applejack cried out.

“I can’t sustain the spell if it is being cast on him! What do you propose?” Twilight snapped back.

“Hide?” Fluttershy whimpered.

Come to think of it, that wasn’t a bad idea. I’ve always been good at hiding, well, unless Fluttershy was involved in searching for me, as our game of hide and seek proved.

“Hold my bag.” I said, and then headed to one of the vast number of oak trees around me.

I heard the slam of a car door, making me panic; without a second to think I shot up the tree like a squirrel on Red Bull, I climbed all the way up to the top, at the point where the trunk stopped and split into other branches. I didn’t even bother to think about how high up I was, I just hugged the branch I was lying on and listened.

“It was around here somewhere.” A man said.

“The witness said that the bolt was right here.” Another man stated.

I peeked out to see two police officers standing near the fence, one of them pointing to the point where Twilight used her spell. One of them was tall and slender, about six feet high, while the other was short and stocky...

“Well I’m not seeing any signs of scorched earth, are you sure it’s here?” The taller man said down to the other.

“Yes, she said it was by the fence at the edge of the woodland, right here.” The short one replied, stomping the ground.

“Well it’s not here, is it?” The tall one replied.

He squatted down to match the height of the short one, obviously humiliating him for his size.

“Maybe it was aliens.” The short one said.

The tall one burst into laughter.

“Sure, if you say so.” He chuckled.

“It could have been, think about it, a massive lightning bolt, and then no signs of impact. It might be like that War of the Worlds movie.” He mumbled.

“Well, if you see any huge tripods walking about, let me know.” The tall one laughed.

“Hey, what if it’s like a Star Wars Jedi mind thing? What if we’re being tricked into believing there are no aliens here, but in fact we’re surrounded by them?” The short one asked, getting excited.

“Pfft, you’re such a nerd.” The tall one teased.

“I’m not; you’ve just got no imagination.” The little one retorted.

“Quit the sci-fi nonsense and look for this so called impact.” The taller man sighed.

“This sucks, there’s probably no impact, for all we know it was a trick of the light.” The stocky one huffed.

“True…” The slender one replied. “But we still have to look around otherwise we’ll get a bollocking from the fat man upstairs.”

The short one chuckled and walked down the fence, while the taller man lit up a fag and walked in the opposite direction.

After a few minutes of walking up and down the fence, the two gave in.

“Well shorty, I guess these are not the droids we’re looking for; let’s go.”

The two of them burst into laughter, before getting back into their car and informing their superiors that is was a false alarm on the radio. The tall man threw his cigarette onto the ground before they shut the car doors and drove off.

I looked down and found that the six were still under the invisibility spell.

“Alright, it’s safe to come out now!” I called down to them.

With a zap and a fizz, the six reappeared; they were all looking up at me.

“Are you sure?” Twilight shouted up to me.

“Positive!” I replied.

I began to climb back down; when I suddenly heard the branch I was lying on begin to creak. I gulped.

“Ok, no sudden movements now…” I said to myself, as I tried to slide myself across the branch with little force.

But try as I might, the entire branch cracked all the way down the middle, before snapping entirely.

“Shiiiiiiiiiiiit!!!!” I yelled as I fell to the ground below.

“OOF!” I cried as I hit a large branch on the way down.

“ARGH!” I shouted as yet another branch.
“GOD!” Branch number three.
“DAMMIT!” Branch number four.
“YEEAHAHAHOOOW!!!!” I screamed in agony as a branch shot up between my legs and smacked me in the balls.
“Whooaa, daagh!” I yelled as I hit another seven branches, before smacking into the ground, face first.

Everything was surrounded in darkness, and all the sounds around me were fuzzy.

“Callum!” A voice called to me.

I couldn’t tell who it was, as the sound was muffled and my face was buried a good few centimetres into the dirt. Without warning a pair of hooves grabbed onto my arm and rolled me over onto my back, at first everything was all fuzzy, I could only see swirls of colour.

“Callum! Are you ok? Come on, talk to me buddy!” A distressed pony shouted whilst pushing at my chest.

The pony was Rainbow Dash, I could only tell by the light blue blur that was standing only inches away from me.

“Uuuuh…” I moaned.

Rainbow Dash was suddenly pushed aside and a terrified Pinkie Pie planted her nose into mine.

“CALLUM! TALK TO ME!” She screamed.

I summoned enough energy to push Pinkie back and roll onto my side. I rubbed my eyes and coughed.

“Nyah,” I groaned as I pushed myself into a sitting position, “I really need to work on my landings…”

Applejack came up to me and gave me a hoof in standing up properly.

“That was some fall, you ok sugar cube?” She asked.

“I’ve been better…” I grumbled.

Rarity rushed forward in a panic and began to check me all over.

“You’re not ok darling, just look at you; you look like you’ve been hit by a train!” She whimpered.

“How’s my face? Am I still beautiful?” I joked.

“Still beautiful? You never were to start with!” Rainbow Dash sneered.

Dash, Applejack and I chuckled, while Rarity was still fussing over me in a panic.

“This is no laughing matter, you could be seriously hurt!” She whined as she lifted my right arm, making me wince in pain.

“You see? You’re hurting.” She said, prodding my wrist.

“Ow! That doesn’t mean you can make it worse by poking it.” I complained.

“Do you think it might be broken?” Applejack asked.

I wiggled all my fingers, and to my relief they all responded the way they should. I’ve never broken a bone in all my life, and I wasn’t planning on having any broken any time soon. I’ve fallen from plenty of trees in my time, some were even higher than this one, Rarity was just overreacting a bit.

“Nope, it’s just a strained wrist.” I said.

“You sure?” Applejack questioned.

“Yes, its fine, I’m ok.” I protested, trying to push Rarity away from jabbing at me.

“Try saying that while looking in a mirror.” Dash giggled.

I tilted my head on one side, not sure of what she meant, until Rarity used her magic to create a mirror for me. Now I knew what she meant; my whole face was covered in dirt, I was entirely coated in filth from head to toe; I had hit the ground with so much force that I had pretty much merged with the earth itself.

“Yeah yeah, whatever.” I stuck my tongue out, and instantly regretted it as I got a mouthful of mud.

I started spluttering in an attempt to spit out the mud, causing Rainbow Dash and Applejack to burst into laughter, even Rarity was unable to stifle a giggle. It was at this point where Pinkie bounded back up to me and pointed behind me.

“There’s a small stream about thirty metres over there.” She said.

“How do you know that?” I asked.

“Just a hunch.” The pink mare grinned, before going over to one of the tent packs and setting it up.

“Oooh, springy!” She squeaked, before bouncing off humming her little tunes.

I ignored Pinkie’s randomness and turned around, I then proceeded to head over to this so called ‘stream’.

It turns out there was a stream; never again would I doubt a Pinkie hunch. I bent down and started to wash all the dirt off my face and arms, I was almost finished when I heard a scream from behind me. I turned around to see Rarity sprinting towards me.

“Callum! Your leg!” She yelled, skidding to a halt in front of me.

I looked down to see nothing abnormal on my leg, just a lot of mud.

“What about it? Why are you screaming?” I asked.

“It’s bleeding!” Rarity bleated in a panic, prodding my calf muscle.

As soon as her hoof made contact, a stinging pain shot into my leg, making me jump.

“OW! Rarity, can you please stop poking me!?” I shouted.

“But, but your leg is blee-”

“That doesn’t mean you can keep poking it.” I butted in.

I sat down and looked at my calf to find it was indeed, bleeding. It was quite a nasty gash as well. I heard hoofsteps and looked around to see Rainbow Dash, Applejack and Fluttershy coming towards us.

“What’s wrong? I heard a scream.” Rainbow Dash said, looking around for danger.

“It’s nothing,” I started, “Rarity’s just concerned about a little cut on my leg.”

“Sweet! Let’s see it!” Dash grinned and came forward.

I stood up and showed her the cut, causing the pegasus to give a long whistle.

“Now that’s a cut! But I’ve had worse.” She smirked, raising her eyebrows and closing her eyes.

“Please, you ain’t ever had a cut that big.” Applejack said, rolling her eyes.

“Have so! It was when I broke my wing that one time.” Rainbow Dash argued.

I sat there chuckling as the two mares began to argue about who’s had the worst injury, there was another jolt of pain in my leg as a hoof began to dab at the cut.

“Rarity, for the last time…” I growled as I turned around.

But it was not Rarity, it was Fluttershy. She was cleaning the area around the cut with a damp tissue.

“Sorry if it hurts, but it’s best if the cut was kept clean.” Fluttershy said quietly.

“Thanks Fluttershy, but I’ll wash it myself if you don’t mind.” I smiled as I stood up.

She nodded and headed off with the others, who were going back to help Twilight and Pinkie set up the tents, leaving me to finish washing.

When I finished cleaning up my leg I inspected the wound, it was pretty deep, and blood was still oozing out of it, more so now that I had washed, but besides that it wasn’t that serious. As long as I bandaged it I’m sure it’d heal up in a good two to three days, it should be fine by the time I got to Brazil.

I looked into the sky and noticed it was getting darker, dusk was here and the night would follow quickly. I stood up and headed back over to the tents, or where the tents should have been for that matter, as they were gone.

“Uh, guys?” I asked out loud.

I listened and looked around, nothing; then there was a small fizz as Applejack appeared a small distance away from me, it was as if she had come out of thin air.

“Over here sugar cube.” She called as she gestured for me to come over to her.

I walked over to her and started to feel a great warmth radiating from the area around us, it grew hotter and hotter. Suddenly there was a flash of white light and a beautiful sight came into vision.
Three large tents stood before me, and a metre or so in front of that was a large campfire with five of the ponies sitting around it. A sweet smell wafted over to me and into my nose, it was a delightful smell, but what was it?
That’s when Rainbow Dash answered my thoughts.

“Take a seat,” She smiled, “we’ve got marshmallows.”

Chapter Nine: Sweet Stuff

Chapter Nine - Sweet Stuff

Marshmallows… It had been too long since I’d eaten a marshmallow, I was around six years old when I went camping with my dad. As I sat down next to Rainbow Dash and Pinkie, Rarity levitated the bag over to me along with a small wooden skewer. I took a white marshmallow out and put the skewer through it, and then shuffled closer to the fire and began to roast it.

Attempt number one was a grand success; I managed to roast the marshmallow to the point where it was crispy and brown all the way around; it was perfection.

“Whoa, nice one!” Rainbow Dash cheered.

“Thanks.” I said as I engulfed the marshmallow in one bite.

My mouth was flooded with warmth and the sweet creamy goodness, it was the tastiest thing I’d ever eaten in my life. The flavour was amazing; I let out a delighted moan as I slowly chewed the delicious treat. The most special part for me was that these marshmallows had come from Equestria; I was eating Equestrian food, hoofmade by Equestrian cooks, most probably Mr or Mrs Cake from Sugarcube Corner.

“Oh mu gud, this thastes so umuzing!” I said with a mouthful of marshmallow.

The ponies giggled, and then Pinkie jammed seven marshmallows into her mouth all at once.

“I get they taste good and all, but are they really that good?” Applejack asked, taking a bite out of her own marshmallow.

I swallowed my marshmallow before I answered.

“Well, I haven’t had one in a good ten years, so they taste pretty damn awesome for me right now.” I replied.

At that, Pinkie Pie screamed in surprise, firing all her half eaten marshmallows at me like a cannon.

“What!? Ten years!?” She yelled.

“Yup, ten years.” I laughed, brushing off the marshmallows.

“That’s an awfully long time.” Fluttershy said.

“Yeah, it was when I went camping with my dad one time, not far from here actually.” I explained.

Rarity reached over to the marshmallow bag and skewered another one for herself.

“Funny you should mention that, that’s something we’ve been wondering about; we never heard anything of your father while we were monitoring you, what was he like?” She asked.

I scratched the back of my neck as all the awesome memories of my dad came to the surface.

“He was a great guy, and was the one person I truly respected out of my family.” I replied.

“We never saw him on the monitor, where was he?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“I don’t know, he didn't live the rest of my family.” I answered.

“Why not?” Rarity quizzed.

I sighed as I remembered how my mother had kicked him out, I understood that my father had done wrong by gambling our money away, but it was with good intention, all he wanted was to gain some extra money to help the family, it’s not his fault it backfired.

“To be honest, I’d rather not talk about it.” I said.

“Aw come on,” Rainbow Dash pressed, “what happened?”

“Maybe another time, but I don’t want to talk about it right now.” I replied.

Dashie accepted that I wasn’t going to say, so she sat back down and skewered another marshmallow.

“Hey, let’s play a game!” Pinkie suggested.

“Good idea, it’s about time we did something besides trudging around for miles and hiding from the police.” Rainbow Dash said.

“And fallin’ from trees.” Applejack chuckled.

As Applejack said that, Rarity stood up and headed over to one of the tents.

“Oh, I’m glad you mentioned that Applejack, I forgot that we need to put some healing gel onto that cut of yours Callum.” She said, levitating a bag out from the tent.

She levitated out a bottle full of some strange gel, it was light blue in colour and as Rarity took the lid off I could smell a strong mix of bleach and lemons.

“Did you have to open it out here, why not in your tent?” Rainbow Dash coughed.

Rarity ignored Dash and walked over to Fluttershy and passed the bottle to her.

“Aren’t you doing it?” I asked.

At that, Rarity giggled.

“Darling, I’m a fashion designer; I don’t know the first thing about wounds and applying things to them. Fluttershy on the other hoof took a two year course in nursing, and used to have a part-time job at the Ponyville hospital.” She explained.

“Wow!” I exclaimed, “The more you know…”

Fluttershy walked next to me and gestured for me to sit down, I obeyed and sat on one of rugs that were placed around the fire.

“Hey Callum, I dare you to take a great big wiff from the bottle.” Rainbow Dash smirked.

“Oh don’t be so silly Dashie. You know what happened when you got Twilight to do it.” Fluttershy said, frowning at Rainbow Dash.

“Yeah, it was hilarious! She didn’t talk to me for a week afterwards!” Dash laughed.

Now that Dash had mentioned Twilight, I realised that she wasn’t outside; that misery guts must have been sulking in one of the tents.

“Do it, or forever be deemed scaredy cat!” She taunted.

I took the bait; I’ve never backed down from a dare, and I never will; I’ve had to do some crazy dares at my Scouts group; for instance, one time I had to climb onto the scout hut and do a cartwheel off the side whilst yodelling. I also had to suck on someone’s big toe, which was probably the worst dare I’ve done. If Rainbow Dash was into dares, this adventure was going to become a whole lot more interesting.

“Challenge accepted!” I shouted in an American accent.

I grabbed the bottle and jammed my nose into it before inhaling deeply, and instantly went through one of the most painful experiences of my life to date. I felt like someone had poured petrol into my nostrils and stuck a lit match into them, my throat went dry and my eyes began to water; I fell onto my side and began to cough and splutter everywhere.
For me, this was complete agony, while for Dash, Rarity and Applejack it was the best thing they’d ever seen, through my writhing in agony and coughing I could hear all three of them roaring with laughter.

“IT BURNS! IT BURNS US!” I wailed.

The pain only got worse as it spread to my mouth; it felt like I was chewing on a full pack of Birdseye’s hottest chillies, I continued to splutter with my tongue lolling out of my mouth.

“This is better than when Twilight did it! You put your nose right into it!” Rainbow Dash howled, tears streaming down her face.

She fell onto the floor and continued to laugh; Applejack was also in tears with laughter, while Rarity was beginning to calm down.

“How are you feeling Callum?” Rarity giggled.

“Paaaain…” I groaned loudly.

“Get the poor bastard some water!” Rainbow Dash squealed, still rolling around with laughter.

“Rainbow Dash! Language!” Rarity scolded.

“Oh come now Rarity, it’s all in good fun.” Applejack chuckled.

“Are you not forgetting the ponies present?” Rarity said, glancing at Fluttershy and Pinkie.

Pinkie was completely oblivious to the word, and Fluttershy was just looking at the ground, doing her best to ignore the whole situation. Applejack got up and headed into one of the tents, still chuckling.

“What do you want?” I heard Twilight moan from inside.

“I’m just gettin’ some water.” Applejack replied.

“What for?” Twilight asked with her voice full of hostility.

“For drinking of course! You don’t need to be so confrontational all the time Twilight.” Applejack said.

“Whatever, just get that idiot outside to shut up.” Twilight snapped.

Applejack ignored Twilight’s attitude and walked back out the tent with a bottle of water.

“Here.” Applejack said, offering the water to me.

I sat up and grabbed the water without saying a word, I unscrewed the cap and chugged the entire bottle, when I was finished I flopped back onto the ground and gasped in relief, about ten seconds later an incredibly amused Rainbow Dash walked up to me.

“Dude, you’ve made my day.” She giggled.

“I hate you Dash…” I groaned.

She began to laugh again as she gave me a hoof with sitting up; Fluttershy then walked over to me with the bottle of foul gel.

“Can we put this on your leg now?” She asked quietly.

I leaned back and put my leg out so Fluttershy could get to the cut; she turned the bottle upside down and let some of the thick blue goo ooze out onto her hoof.

“Now, this might sting a bit, but it’s really good for the cut, it stops any bacteria getting in and it heals the wound faster.” She explained.

“Yeah, I’ve used antiseptics before, just get it over with, the smell is killing me.” I moaned.

Fluttershy nodded before turning my leg slightly so she could get to the cut better, and then smeared the goo over it. She wasn’t kidding about it stinging, it felt like someone rubbed salt into the wound, followed by a swarm of wasps stinging it, followed by setting it on fire; I gritted my teeth and let out a small growl.

“Oh shush you.” Fluttershy giggled.

That giggle… I almost died there and then from a heart attack. Let it be said, Fluttershy had the cutest giggle, it melted my heart in an instant. The pain in my leg disappeared as she removed her hoof from my leg and let the goo settle; I looked down to see it was rapidly turning thicker and thicker and formed a dry skin over the top, within seconds it had solidified like ice.

“What is that stuff?” I asked.

“Healing gel, Zecora made it; she called it ‘Kuphila Amanzi’. It goes solid when it comes into contact with warm blood, so the wound is not disturbed and can heal.” Fluttershy explained.

“That’s awesome; I need to get some of that.” I said with my eyebrows raised.

“When are we playing our game?” Pinkie called from the other side of the campfire.

“Aww guys, we forgot about Pinkie!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed.

Pinkie bounced over to us with a big frown on her face.

“Sorry Pinkie, we got a little caught up in sorting out Callum’s leg.” Rarity apologised.

Pinkie’s reply was a snort and a huff.

“Hey Pinkie, would it cheer you up if you were allowed to choose the game?” I asked with a smile.

“Yippie!” She squeaked, bouncing up and down with a big grin.

Pinkie’s personality made me laugh; the way she could just forgive and forget was quite outstanding.

“We’ve still got hundreds of marshmallows, can we play Fluffy Bunnies?” Pinkie suggested.

“I love that game!” Rainbow Dash cried out.

“I only like it for its name.” Fluttershy whispered.

I tilted my head on one side, I had never heard of the game.

“What’s Fluffy Bunnies?” I asked.

“It’s a vulgar, uncouth game that involves stuffing your face.” Rarity sighed.

Pinkie bounced right up to me, no awareness of personal space, and gave her view on the game.

“Fluffy Bunnies is a game where you put a marshmallow in your mouth and say ‘fluffy bunnies’, then you keep putting in more marshmallows until you can’t say it anymore, and you’re not allowed to chew them.” She explained.

As much as Rarity was one of my favourite ponies, I’d have to stick with Pinkie on this one, Fluffy Bunnies sounded like an awesome game. I had a very sweet tooth, so Pinkie would have a decent challenge.

“Sweet, so who’s in?” I asked, looking around at the others.

“Me!” Pinkie yelled in my face.

“And me!” Rainbow Dash shouted.

“Me too!” Applejack cheered.

“Uh, fine… But only because you’re doing it.” Rarity huffed.

“What about you Fluttershy?” I asked, turning around to look at the yellow pegasus.

As I came to face Fluttershy, I noticed that she had disappeared, I then saw her tail disappear into one of the tents.

“What’s up with her?” I asked.

“She threw up last time she played the game, she’s never played it since.” Rainbow Dash explained.

“Fair enough.” I said, shrugging.

I then went over to Pinkie who was holding the marshmallow bag and grinning like a maniac. The others followed me and we sat in a circle.

“As the Ponyville Champion, record holder of seventeen marshmallows, I shall start us off!” Pinkie declared.

She stuck her head into the bag, scooped out a marshmallow and stuffed it into her cheek.

“Fluffy bunnies, easy peasy!” She squeaked.

Rarity was next, she removed a marshmallow and did the same as Pinkie.

“Fluffy bunnies.”

Next was Rainbow Dash, who stuffed her head into the bag, much like how Pinkie did. Come to think of it, Dash and Pinkie were incredibly alike, yet they also act so different. Dash was a hot-headed, athletic, tom-boy, while Pinkie was a hyperactive, crazy, sugar-head.
Yet differences aside, they both loved dares, they both loved pranking ponies, and they would do anything for a bag of marshmallows by the looks of things, the more I thought about it, the more they had in common.

“Fluffy bunnies!” Dash cheered.

She gave me that bag, and I took out a white one, my favourite.

“Stop picking the white ones, it’s not fair to keep eating Rarity’s kind!” Rainbow Dash giggled, still with her marshmallow in her cheek.

Applejack joined in the laughter, while Rarity frowned.

“For the last time, I am not a marshmallow!” She shouted.

This caused her marshmallow to shoot out of her mouth like a handgun, it landed into the fire and melted away into a gooey sludge.

“Mini Rarity! No!” Dash cried out, lying on her stomach in fits of laughter.

All of us burst into laughter at that, even Rarity was forced to let out a small giggle.

“Looks like you’re out Rare.” Applejack said.

“That’s not fair; I was provoked into spitting it out. It was by accident as well.” Rarity complained.

“Okie dokie lokie, give her another go.” Pinkie piped.

I handed Rarity the bag, and just as I expected, she took out a pink one, not white.

“I told you she’s a marshmallow, she never takes the white ones.” Dash whispered to me, still giggling.

“I heard that.” Rarity growled as she popped her marshmallow into her mouth and said ‘fluffy bunnies’.

I did the same, as the marshmallow made contact with my tongue the wonderful taste flooded my mouth once more, I almost ended up chewing it.

“Fluffy bunnies.” I said with ease.

Rarity levitated the bag over to Applejack, who did it with just as much ease as the rest of us.

“Alright, now time for round two!” Pinkie yelled.

And so the bag went back to Pinkie, this game was going to be intense…

Five minutes went by in the blink of an eye and we had all managed to make it to round five, and it looked like Rarity was going to lose first, she was having to hold her marshmallows in with her hoof just to prevent them from firing out of her mouth.

“Fluffy boonis!” Pinkie squealed.

She then passed the bag over to Rarity, by now we simply passed the bag along without saying anything due to our mouths being stuffed. Rarity let out a deep groan as she attempted to force the marshmallow into her mouth.

“Fruf-” Was all she could manage, before half of her marshmallows were ejected out onto the ground.

Pinkie began to laugh, and somehow managed to hold in all her marshmallows, I could tell that she was most likely going to win, but I was going to give her a good run for her money.
Rarity accepted her defeat, then chewed and swallowed her other marshmallows.

“Well, I beat my last record of only four, so it’s not a total loss.” She smiled as she passed the bag to Rainbow Dash.

The next to go out was Applejack, who met her fate on a valiant round eight.

“Darn it…” She said as she ate the marshmallows that she hadn’t fired all over the camp.

“Turm frr roond noon!” Pinkie muffled as she drew a tally line in the dirt to signal the start of round nine.

She took out a marshmallow and stuffed into her mouth, it looked like she was beginning to struggle, but she still managed to shout a muffled ‘fluffy bunnies’.

The bag then went to Rainbow Dash, who was on the verge of breaking, it required her hoof just to cram her ninth marshmallow in.

“Floob… Flub… Fluoo… Flubbu bummies!” She said with great difficulty.

She passed by the skin of her teeth, but there was no way she’d get past round ten.

The bag then came to me, I took out my ninth marshmallow and found a nice pocket for it in my cheek.

“Fruffy bunnies!” I shouted.

Pinkie passed round ten with just as much ease as the round before, but just as I had expected, Rainbow Dash met her defeat. Unlike the others, she managed to keep all the marshmallows in her mouth, but she just couldn’t get the words out.

“Fff. Fub… Frrububur! Murrb!” She muffled loudly, before bowing her head to admit an honourable defeat.

She chewed up and swallowed her marshmallows before sitting next to the others who didn’t win.
I took my marshmallow and popped it into my mouth.

“Fruffy bunnies.” I said, not taking my eyes off Pinkie’s.

“Round eleven!” Dash shouted.

Pinkie removed a pink marshmallow from the bag, and found a place to squeeze it in.

“Fruffy bummies!” She squeaked.

I took a white marshmallow from the bag, but still not taking my eyes off Pinkie who was squinting at me intensely, I squinted back as I put the marshmallow into my cheek.

“Fuffy boonies.”

I passed round eleven with no more difficulty than Pinkie, if anything I found it easier than she did; I had a possibility of winning here…

“This is going to be close!” Dash called, before the bag went back to Pinkie…

Six rounds passed, this was it… This was Pinkie’s record.
Pinkie took out her seventeenth marshmallow, there was no way she could do this, both her cheeks were bulging. For a pony who ate sweets all the time, I was quite surprised that she was being bested by a mere marshmallow. As she opened her mouth to insert the marshmallow a small amount of drool dripped from her lips, causing Rarity to cringe and cover her eyes, while it made Rainbow Dash burst into yet another fit of laughter.

“The two of you look ridiculous!” She cried out, “Your cheeks look like a pair of apples!”

I ran my finger down my cheek to find it really was about the size of an apple, I didn’t believe they could even get to that size!
Fluttershy came out of her tent to see how the game was going, took one look at me, and squeaked.

"How is he doing that with his face!?" She shrieked, before diving back into her tent.

Pinkie put her marshmallow against the sticky wall of others, and used her hoof to force it in.

“Frr, Frrb, fff…” She muffled.

A smile began to creep out onto my face, she couldn’t say it; she physically could not do it!

“Faf, fuff bub!” She muffled again, more desperately this time.

She then tried to move the marshmallows out of the way with her tongue, when she suddenly gagged and shot her marshmallows at me like a machine gun, one by one they hit me in the face, which almost made me gag as well; I wiped the marshmallows off as Pinkie looked at the floor.

“I… I couldn’t do it… I just couldn’t do it…” She sighed, her ears falling to the side of her head.

Her ears then perked up again as she picked up the bag and threw me a white marshmallow.

“Well, your turn, let’s see if you can do it.” She said.

The others all crowded around me as I lifted the marshmallow to my face.

“If you do this, you beat the Ponyville champion.” Rainbow Dash said.

“Yeah, but at such a high score, I’d be honoured if Callum beat me!” Pinkie squeaked.

That made me feel a little bit better about winning, I’m glad Pinkie wasn’t a sore loser. I felt pretty bad for taking Pinkie’s title, I could fail the round on purpose and pass it as a draw…
But unfortunately for Pinkie, I was a lot like Rainbow Dash when it came to games, although I play for the fun of it, I won’t pass the chance to win while I’m at it. I stuffed the marshmallow into my mouth, forced it into my cheek, which was now in agony, and stated my victory.

“Ff, fruf… Frubbu… Fabbu… Fuffy bummies!”

Rainbow Dash’s jaw dropped, Rarity’s eyes widened, and Pinkie fell back onto her bottom.

“Dude… No way…” Dashie breathed, taking a step back.

“Yea haw! Fillies and gentlecolts… We have a new champion!” Applejack cried out.

They all cheered and swarmed around me, Applejack gave me a heavy pat on the back, which turned me into Planet Earth’s first human shotgun, my marshmallows fired out all at once, hitting both Dashie and Rarity, this caused Rarity to scream and frantically attempt to brush them off herself.

“Get them off! Get them off!” She yelled.

“Hey look! The mini-Rarities have gone back to their queen!” Rainbow Dash giggled as she assisted Rarity.

“Shut up and get them off! Eww they’re all sticky! Ew! Ew! Ew!” Rarity whined.

All of us had a good five minutes of laughter at Rarity’s distress and Dashie’s brilliantly timed comment. When we had settled down Pinkie came over to me and took a bow, she then stuck out her hoof.

“Great game! We should play it again sometime!” She beamed.

“I look forward to it.” I replied as I shook her hoof.

I rubbed my cheeks as they were aching, and I found that they had become really stretchy, almost like elastic. As much as I loved marshmallows, I don’t think I’d be eating them again for quite a while, regardless of how fun the game was.

After a few jokes and a bit of friendly banter, Applejack came over to me and nudged my shoulder.

“Callum, don’t you think we should get some shut-eye, it’s gettin’ pretty late.” She suggested.

I looked up to realise the sky was pretty dark, I took my phone out of my pocket and checked the time, it was nine o’clock.

“You’ve got a clock on that thing? That’s awesome!” Rainbow Dash said with her eyebrows upraised.

“Eeyup.” I said with my Big McIntosh impression, which was spot on.

“You sound just like my brother.” Applejack giggled.

“Well you see sis’, that’s exactly who I’m tryin’ to impersonate.” I said, continuing the impression.

“Alright stop that, that’s too good, so good that it’s kinda creepy...” Applejack said as gave me a light push.

“So, what’s the time?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“It’s nine o’clock.” I answered.

“It’s not that late.” Dash responded, rolling her eyes.

“Not for you maybe, but some of us actually enjoy a good night’s sleep.” Rarity said, copying Dash by rolling her eyes back at her.

As my normal bed time was around ten, I was on Rainbow Dash’s side.

“Well, you lot can head off to bed if you like; I can stay up with Dash for a little longer.” I suggested.

Rarity nodded and headed off into one of the tents with Pinkie, while Applejack got into the tent with Twilight.

“And then there were two.” I said.

“So, what do you want to talk about?” Rainbow Dash asked.

Come to think about it, I had a shed load of things I wanted to talk about; I wanted to know more about this orb that I was helping the six find, I was also very curious about the colt that Rainbow Dash was talking about earlier today, the second Dash mentioned him it caused Fluttershy to blush and hide under her hooves, so he was definitely her crush or something. I thought it would be best to ask about the more serious topic first though.

“Well, I’m rather curious about this orb that I’ve given my entire life to help you look for, so perhaps you could give me a little more info on that?” I asked.

“When you put it that way, I feel pretty bad for getting you to help us.” Dash said, looking down.

“Don’t feel too bad, let’s be honest, it wasn’t that amazing to start with.” I chuckled.

That caused her to crack a smile.

“So, what do you want to know about the orb?” She quizzed.

“Well, Twilight said something about titans, I’d like to know a little more about that.” I said.

“I’m not much of a historian I’m afraid, so I don’t know all about that, all I know is that there were six titans called the Holy Titans of Harmony. They created Equus, and one of them was Celestia and Luna’s mother, one went nuts and ate the others, then some hero sent him to the other side of the universe.” She explained.

I raised my eyebrows as I took in all that information, so Equestria was made by titans, and one of them created Celestia and Luna; well there went my Fausticorn theory…

“Do you know why one of the titans ate the others?” I asked.

“I don’t know, like I said, I’m no historian, my guess is that he got a serious case of the munchies.” She replied.

The two of us burst into laughter, Rainbow Dash and I seemed to share the same sense of humour; although she acted a lot like Pinkie, I found that she was a bit like me as well.
For the history of these Holy Titans of Harmony, I knew that I wouldn’t get any more information from Dash.
As for my second concern on the other hand, I had a feeling that she’d know a thing or two about that.

“Hey, I was wondering, earlier today you mentioned some colt that Fluttershy knew, as soon as you said it she got really flustered, what gives?” I asked.

Rainbow Dash giggled a little before she answered.

“Oh, him.” She said, still lightly chuckling. “Yeah, he’s some colt that Fluttershy’s known since she was a filly, and she’s got a major crush on him, they were practically made for each other!”

“What’s his name?” I queried, leaning forward.

“I think it was Midnight or something, Fluttershy just calls him Middy though.” Dash replied.

“So, what’s he like? What does Fluttershy like about him so much?” I continued to inquire.

“His coat is a deep blue, and his mane is a lighter pale blue; as for his personality, I’ve only met him a few times, so I don’t know him too well, but from what I’ve seen he’s pretty sweet. He was pretty shy when I met him, but apparently he can be really hyper. Oh, and the dude’s obsessed with birds, he’s got his own aviary; he’s got owls, eagles, hawks, you name it; if it has feathers, Midnight has one as a pet.” Dash explained.

I scratched my chin, I was quite concerned at how much this ‘Midnight’ character sounded a lot like Bruce, he was a total bird lover, and he had a very ‘Shy one minute, hyper the next’ attitude; after a few moments thinking about it, I shrugged it off as a coincidence.

“Don’t tell anyone I told you this, but Fluttershy has a picture of him in her saddle bag, she looks at it before going to sleep.” Dashie whispered.

She then lightly chuckled to herself, while I didn’t find it so funny, I’d say that it was more cute than it was amusing. It must be a pretty serious crush; I was surprised that she’d shared her feelings with Rainbow Dash of all ponies.

“So, how come Fluttershy told you about it and nopony else?” I quizzed.

“Because we’ve known each other since we were little fillies! We played together, we went to flight school together, we practically lived together; Flutters and I have a special bond, we’re not like sisters, and we’re not like friends, we’re something much closer; she’d trust me with her life, let alone a crush.” She said with pride.

As much as I tried, I couldn’t stop myself from letting out an “Aww…”

“That’s really sweet; it’s nice to know that you two have such a special bond.” I said warmly.

“Yeah, but I’m sure you’ll bond with her as well; like I said earlier today, she’s warmed to you really quickly.” She replied.

“Any reason why?” I asked.

Rainbow shrugged.

“Probably because you’re not a pony, she loves interacting with other species; she’s such an animal lover.” She suggested.

I raised an eyebrow and loudly cleared my throat, Dash suddenly realised what she’d just said.

“Not that you’re an animal or anything, that came out wrong, I mean that she just-”

“I knew what you meant, I'm teasing.” I interrupted, smiling.

She took a small sigh of relief; I then sat forward and stretched, causing my upper back to give a small crunch.

“So who’s sleeping in which tent tonight?” I asked.

“Applejack’s with Twilight in that tent.” Dash pointed to one of the tents. “Me, Pinkie and Rarity are in the big one, and you’re in there with Fluttershy.” She said, pointing to the other two tents.

“I would have thought you’d want to be in with Fluttershy, seeing as you have this special bond.” I quoted.

Dash gave a huff as she rolled her eyes.

“Oh please, we have a great bond and all, but I’d rather be in with the moody Egghead than stay with Flutters.” She replied.

“Oh?” I said with my head tilted on one side.

“It’s a nightmare camping with Fluttershy, she always needs the toilet in the middle of the night, and she is too scared to go out alone, somepony has to go with her.” Dash explained.

“So you decided to stick me in a tent with her?” I asked dully.

“Yup!” Dash grinned.

“Thanks, I appreciate it.” I said sarcastically.

“Anytime.” She replied.

I took a gentle sigh as I flopped onto my back and looked into the night sky, it was lovely, not a cloud in sight. Dash and I stopped talking for a short while and just looked at the stars.

“They’re beautiful, aren’t they?” I asked after a few minutes of silence.

“What, the stars?”

“Yeah.”

“Not really…”

“Oh come on, just look at them, all the details and the patterns are stunning.”

“You sound like Rarity.” Dash giggled.

“How so?” I asked.

“Being obsessed with patterns and colours and stuff.” She said.

“I’m not obsessed with patterns and colours, I just like to admire them.” I replied.

“Pff, gay.” She snorted.

“Says the one with a rainbow coloured mane.” I retorted.

“Whatever…” Dash said as she stuck her tongue out at me.

We chuckled, before I reached into my pocket and took out my phone to check the time.

“Right, the time’s ten o’clock, we should get to bed.” I said with a yawn.

Dash simply nodded and stood up and stretched like a cat.

“Well, see you tomorrow dude.” She said.

“Yeah, see you.” I replied.

“Nice chat by the way, we should do this again sometime.” She said with a smile.

“Definitely.” I said, before I turned towards my tent, Dash did the same.

I walked over to the tent and unzipped the entrance; I took off my shoes and left them outside so the bedding didn’t get dirty.

As I entered the tent I saw Fluttershy quickly hide something under the covers.

“Hi Callum.” She smiled, acting as if I hadn’t seen whatever it was she was hiding.

To spare her the embarrassment, I went along with it.

{Probably that picture of her ‘Middy’…} I thought to myself.

“Hey, I hope I didn’t wake you up.” I said as I crawled over to my sleeping bag.

“No, I was awake.” She replied.

I got into my sleeping bag, and took a long sigh; today had been a long day, a very long day. I had trashed my house, killed a clone of myself, just thinking about it made my stomach turn; I had given my puppy Chilli away to Bruce, I had learned teleportation, I had hidden from the police, and I took away Pinkie’s well-earned title of Fluffy Bunnie Champion. All I wanted now, was a good long rest; I snuggled down and closed my eyes and began to drift off to sleep.

About ten minutes later I was disturbed by a hoof prodding my arm, I rolled over to see Fluttershy sitting up with her legs crossed. She didn’t need to say anything for me to know what she needed.

“Um… Callum…”

I hate you Rainbow Dash…

Author's Note

Hah! GAAAAAAAAAY!!!

Chapter Ten: Midnight Musings

Chapter Ten - Booking a Flight, Egghead Style

“Callum, thank you so much for coming out with me, I’m terrified of being outside in the dark alone…” Fluttershy said as we left the tent and walked towards a clump of trees.

“Yeah, let’s just get this over with, I just want to sleep…” I grumbled.

We got to the clump of trees and Fluttershy went behind a small bush.

“Please don’t look.” She quietly squeaked.

“I wasn’t planning to.” I replied, already looking in the opposite direction.

I walked a few paces away so I wouldn’t have to hear anything either.

“Don’t go too far, it’s scary out here…” Fluttershy whimpered.

“I’m not, just get on with it.” I said grumpily.

She said nothing more as she did her business; I quietly whistled a little tune to myself while I waited.

When she was finally done, she came out behind the tree and walked over to me.

“Okay, all done.” She said quietly.

{About damn time} I thought to myself.

Just as we turned towards the tent, my own bladder decided it needed to go.

“Alright Flutters, you head back to the tent, I could do with a wizz myself.” I said.

“Okay then, thanks for coming with me.” She replied with a small nod.

“Don’t mention it.” I sighed.

“I mean it, thank y-”

“Ever.” I said dully, interrupting her.

She nodded and headed back towards the tent, somewhere in the trees an owl hooted, causing Fluttershy to give a small squeak and jump into the tent and zip it up; this caused me to lightly chuckle to myself as I found a nice bush to pee on.
I unzipped my trousers and began to do my business, when I heard a twig snap, a very loud twig snap; it sounded like something big, I turned my head to find nothing; I quickly finished my job and zipped up again. When I came to face the bush again all I could see was a large pair of eyes.

“Boo!” It shouted.

“Jesus fuck nuggets!” I yelped and jumped back, almost falling over.

This caused whoever was in front of me to burst into laughter; I instantly recognised the scratchy tone in her voice.

“Rainbow Dash!” I growled, glaring at the laughing pegasus.

“Oh my gosh! You should have seen the look on your face!” She squealed in delight.

“Couldn’t you see I was in the middle of taking a piss?” I asked, still glaring at her.

“Yeah, which was the best time to strike, when you were all defenceless.” She giggled.

“There are still boundaries.” I said.

“Nah, just guys who can’t take a joke.” She continued to giggle.

“It’s almost eleven o’clock, I’m tired, all I want is to get some sleep, so you know what, at this point in time, it’s not a joke, it’s just plain annoying, and the fact you were watching me piss is just plain creepy!” I replied, still angry at her for making me jump.

“Geez, no need to be a dick about it, and I wasn’t watching you, I waited until you were finished.” She retorted.

“It’s still a little too much when it’s near eleven o’clock at night Dash.” I moaned.

“Fine.” She huffed, rolling her eyes.

“Right, I’m going to see if I can actually get any sleep before sunrise, so goodnight.” I said with a yawn.

“Cool, see you tomorrow dude.” She replied, giving a little yawn of her own.

The both of us went back to our tents; when I unzipped and got into mine, I noticed that Fluttershy was fast asleep. As quietly as possible, I zipped the tent entrance back up, and wriggled into my sleeping bag; no more than five minutes later, I finally drifted away into sleep.

I was naturally an early bird, so when I awoke the sun had only just risen, outside the tent I could hear birdsong, and the somepony snoring, after watching the episode ‘Sleepless in Ponyville’, I had a good feeling that it was Rainbow Dash.

I looked over to see Fluttershy, still fast asleep. I had expected her to be adorable when she was asleep, all tucked up with a little smile on her face, but much to my surprise, she didn’t sleep as eloquently as I thought; she was on her side, one leg tucked in, the other stretched out, her mouth wide open, and a small trickle of drool ran down her bottom lip. I quietly chuckled to myself as I unzipped the tent.
I was greeted with the warm sun and a little sparrow standing in front of my shoe, which I had left outside the night before; the bird was beautiful, its brown feathers in perfect condition; it took one look at me, tweeted, and then flew off. I put my shoes on and took a big stretch.

“So it seems that I’m not the only early bird in the group.” A voice said.

I turned around to see Rarity, who was levitating a cup by her side.

“Morning Rarity.” I smiled, giving her a little wave.

“Tea?” She offered, pulling a second cup out of her saddlebag, trust Rarity to bring teacups with her on an adventure to another planet.

“I’m British, of course I want tea!” I laughed.

She tilted her head on one side. I had already told her about the different countries in the world, and that we were in England, but I guess she didn’t know about our stereotypes yet.

“What does your country of origin have to do with wanting tea?” She asked.

“It’s a stereotype, they say that all British people like tea.” I explained.

“I see… But why?” Rarity quizzed.

“I don’t know, probably because we’re also known to be very posh and proper.” I said, quoting with my fingers to put emphasis on the ‘proper’.

Rarity shrugged as she began to pour the tea.

“Do you have any milk at all?” She asked.

“Yeah, but not too much.” I confirmed.

“Do you take sugar?” She queried.

“No thank you Rarity, I’m sweet enough…” I replied with a grin.

She giggled as she put the milk in, which forced me to grin like a gibbon, Rarity had an amazing giggle, almost as cute as Fluttershy’s. Rarity, being usually very formal and ladylike, it was very rare that you heard her giggle, which made it all that much cuter.
Rarity levitated me the cup over to me along with a cookie of some sort.

“Here you go.” She said with a smile, before taking a sip from her own tea.

I took my first sip, and bloody hell was it good! Rarity sure knew how to make good tea. I then took a nibble out of the biscuit, it was amazing, I’d never tasted something like it before. The flavour was lovely, the first bite it was like an ordinary British biscuit, but then the flavour changed so that it tasted like cinnamon, as I swallowed it I was left with a vanilla aftertaste.

“Rarity, this is divine! What is it exactly?” I asked, still amazed by the taste.

“They are called Threezies, they’re cookies infused with tiny edible crystals that release a different flavour when they make contact with your saliva, and they also leave a different aftertaste as well, so you end up getting three different flavours.” She explained.

“That’s awesome!” I said with my eyebrows raised.

“What’s awesome?” Another voice asked.

I knew who it was the second they had spoken, the thick Texan accent that belonged to Applejack couldn't really be mistaken.

“Good morning Applejack, I was just showing Callum the Threezie biscuits. Do you want one?” Rarity replied, levitating the packet to Applejack.

“No thanks sugar cube, I don’t need no fancy snack for breakfast, I’m good with apples.” Applejack said as she pulled a red apple out of her saddlebag, she then put the bag onto her back before starting to munch away at the apple.

I chuckled, I don’t know how I didn’t expect Applejack to have an apple or two on her somewhere.

“So, when are we setting off?” Applejack asked with her mouth full of apple.

“When the others get up.” I replied.

“How exactly do we sneak onto this plane? And, how do we even know it’s going to Brazil?” Rarity asked.

{Crap.} I thought to myself.

“I’m still working on that.” I replied.

How did I not think about that? How the heck did I know what plane to catch? I knew that there was a terminal with all the information about the flights, planes, and departure times, but that was off bounds to the public, even if I found the terminal, I’d never be able to find the plane in time before getting caught; unless…

“Rarity, do unicorns have a spell to find certain things in large documents?” I asked.

“Actually, I think we do, Twilight has it, she can find a single keyword in any book in her library within seconds.” She answered.

“Excellent…” I said deviously, putting my fingertips together.

“How does that help exactly?” Rarity asked.

“I need Twilight to use that spell on a computer to find what plane we’re getting on.” I explained.

“Will the spell work with your technology? It only works with physical documents on paper.” Rarity quizzed.

“I have no idea, but it’s worth a shot,” I replied.

In the small space of time, I had formulated the idea that perhaps Twilight could scan through the terminal under the keyword ‘Brazil’, I didn’t know if it would work, but if we wanted to get somewhere, we’d at least have to try; then an idea popped into my head.

“We could try testing it with my phone.” I suggested.

“That could work…” Rarity shrugged.

“Then let’s try it.” Applejack said, “I’ll go and wake the egghead.”

“Is that such a good idea?” Rarity asked worriedly.

“Of course, she’ll be fine with it.” Applejack smiled before heading off into the tent.

Rarity and I went silent as we listened out with anticipation.

“Hey, Twi, Twilight, wake up.” We heard Applejack whisper from inside the tent.

Nothing…

“Twilight, get up.” Applejack said a little louder.

Still nothing.

“Twi, get up, oh for goodness s- JYAAH!!!” Applejack shouted as we heard a thump inside the tent.

“Applejack, don’t scare me like that!” I heard Twilight shout.

“Scare you? I was tryin’ to wake you!” Applejack shouted back.

“Well don’t wake me by prodding me! For all I know you could have been a filthy human trying to kill me!” Twilight growled.

Rarity gasped next to me, she then shook her head, she had been left entirely speechless.

“That gives you no right to hit me in the face Twilight!” Applejack shouted.

“Does so, what if it were the human we travelling with?” Twilight scoffed back.

“Callum! His name is Callum, and regardless of who it is, you can’t hit them!” Applejack scolded.

“I don’t care what its name is, just so long as it gets us to the orb shards.” The unicorn spat, as if the words were poison.

“How about we bring Callum in here and see if you’re still up for calling him an ‘it’ to his face?” Applejack asked in a threatening manner.

Rarity could take no more of it, she gave a little cough before trotting into the tent.

“QUIET!” She screamed.

There was utter silence, except for a coughing and a snort from the other tents that signalled the waking of the other ponies, and probably every living creature within the vicinity.

“Huh, what’s going on?” Rainbow Dash snorted as she poked her head out her tent, still half asleep.

“I don’t care about your dislike for Callum, I for one think you are just afraid and lashing out at the unknown, if you want him to help us, you need to stop all these accusations about a race you know nothing about! He’s just come up with an idea on how we get the first shard of the orb! Within a mere week we could already be a sixth of the way! But only if you can be civil and talk to him!” Rarity ranted.

Once again there was silence, Rarity’s sudden outburst was so unexpected that no one knew what to say or do, even I was lost for words.
A hoof jabbed my arm and I turned to see Rainbow Dash standing next to me.

“What’s going on in there?” She asked.

“We came up with a plan and tried to wake Twilight, resulting in Applejack getting a hoof to the face, Twilight tried to justify it by saying she thought it was me, and Rarity’s now telling her off.” I explained.

“Sounds legit.” Dash said, rolling her eyes.

“Well, let’s enter the fray.” I mumbled before entering the tent.

“It’s not my fault that his kind is untrustworthy and violent, and… Oh what’s he doing in here?” Twilight growled as she noticed me.

“Nice to see you too.” I said with a smile.

“What do you want?” She continued to growl.

I got onto my knees, put my hands together, and looked her in the eyes, before pouting.

“I jus wanna be your bes fwiend.” I said in a high pitched, nasally voice so that I sounded like a toddler.

The others laughed, while Twilight simply glared at me.

“What do you want?” She repeated.

I rolled my eyes and gave a big huff.

“Alright little Miss Stressy Pants; I have an idea on how we can find the right plane to Brazil.” I said.

“I told you, we’re not getting on a plane!” She snarled.

“I am your guide, am I not? By Princess Celestia’s order, this group is to follow me by the path I see fit; getting on a plane is the only way there, unless you want to walk, and I don’t think you want to spend an entire year just to find one out of six shards.” I taunted.

As soon as I mentioned Celestia, Twilight was honour bound to listen to me. She glared at me for a good few seconds, thinking of what to say.

“So, this ‘path that you see fit’ is to ascend miles into the air and die?” She asked, purposely trying to make the others afraid.

Luckily, the others saw past this and realised that Twilight was the only one afraid of getting on a plane.

“No, because your spells are going to bypass that. Do you want to hear my idea? Or are you just going to shoot down every suggestion before you’ve even heard them?” I asked calmly, trying my best not to lose my temper with her.

To be perfectly honest, I wasn’t too bothered with Twilight’s behaviour, I’d woken up from a nice sleep, had some amazing tea, experienced my first Threezie biscuit, and I was with the mane six. Even though I had spent a whole day travelling and talking to them, I was still buzzed that this was all real; a tiny part of my brain still believes I’m in a coma and this is all just a dream. If so, then it’s a bloody good one.

“Fine, what’s this so called idea then?” She huffed.

“Well Twilight my dear, I’m glad you asked.” I grinned as I sat down.

“Should we wait for the others?” Applejack asked.

“Good point, Rainbow Dash, be a lamb and get the others.” I commanded.

Rainbow Dash said nothing and shot out of the tent like a bullet, a few seconds later I heard her laughing.

“Fluttershy, has anyone told you that you're like a drunken wreck when you sleep?” She giggled.
Fluttershy replied, but it was too quiet for me to make out, I sat there and twiddled my thumbs and waited.

Eventually Rainbow returned with a yawning Fluttershy, and a hyperactive Pinkie Pie, who crawled into the tent crouching low to the ground like a spider for no apparent reason; they sat down like the rest of us.

“So what’s the plan? Are we going to be like spies? Do we get to sneak into places we’re not allowed to extract super-secret data? Do we use a magic spell to stay under cover and get the intel really fast and get out of there? Then do we have to jump on a plane to make a quick getaway?” Pinkie fired the questions at me like bullets.

I sat there and simply stared at Pinkie, her logic genuinely concerned me, I swear she could read minds, I’d love to learn her secret.

“Basically, yes.” I replied, still staring at Pinkie with fascination.

“And you think we’re actually going to carry out this plan?” Twilight asked.

“Indeed.” I answered with a smile.

“That was rhetorical.” Twilight said dully.

“Well that is the plan.” I said.

“How do you plan on getting this intelligence, and what is it for anyway?” Twilight queried.

“We’re going to extract the time for the plane going to Brazil so we can get to the first orb shard in good time, if we do it this way, we could have the shard within a week.” I told her.

“A week? Surely it would take longer than that.” Applejack said, surprised by the predicted time.

“Maybe two, perhaps three, yet we could also find it on the first day of getting there. It all depends on what part of Brazil the shard has landed in.” I hypothesised.

The ponies all hummed and talked amongst themselves for a few seconds.

“How do we extract this intelligence for the plane time?” Twilight asked.

“In the airport there are a few computers where you could possibly get into the root of the system to find the data we need.” I explained.

“What makes you think I know how to operate your technology?” She questioned.

“We’re going to find out now, with this.” I answered, pulling my phone out of my pocket.

Twilight raised an eyebrow, her attitude switched from being jumpy and hostile, to being very curious about learning to use our tech, I swear she was bipolar or something, a bitch one minute, inquisitive the next…

“How does it work?” She asked.

“I’ll teach you all the mechanics later, but for now let’s just learn what we need to know.” I said.

“Fine, what am I supposed to do?” She huffed.

“Rarity informed me that you have a spell which can allow you to find certain keywords and specific sections in documents.” I started.
She merely nodded, waiting for me to continue.

“Well I had a funny feeling that you might be able to do it with our technology. I don’t know if it will work, but it’s worth a try.” I said as I wiggled my phone around with my fingers.

“What makes you think that?” She asked, with a little less hostility and a little more curiosity.

“I first had the theory when you used the electrical frequencies at the airport to locate the first shard, you seemed to be able to hook onto it with ease, so my thoughts are that you might be able to use the technology directly as well.” I explained.

“You know, I think you might be onto something there Callum.” Rarity said full of enthusiasm.

The others all hummed again to show their agreement, even Twilight tilted her head in positive curiosity.

“How do we test it?” Twilight quizzed.

“I’m going to give you a keyword, and you are going to use your spell under that word on my phone, and we’ll see what happens.” I said.

“Shall we begin?” She asked.

I wanted to get going as soon as possible, but the very convenient rumble of my stomach said otherwise.

“Not yet, I think we should all have breakfast first.” I said.

Pinkie jumped up and down at the sound of food, we were all silenced by a sudden growling, it sounded quite like a lion’s growl, but ten times louder; when the sound faded, everyone looked to where the sound came from, Fluttershy.

“Um, excuse me… I guess I’m a little hungry as well…” She whispered, blushing like a beetroot.

The lot of us burst into laughter, even Twilight cracked a smile, finally… The others left the tent to get breakfast.

“You guys stay there if you like, I’ll get it for you.” Rainbow Dash said with a smile.

“Thanks Dashie.” I replied, bowing my head a little to show my gratitude.

She left the tent, leaving me and Twilight alone. I knew it was only a matter of time before she reverted back to her hostile self, so I thought I’d take advantage of this moment.

“So Twilight, I was wondering if you could teach me a little more about Equestria.” I said.

She raised an eyebrow, but her eyes remained dull.

“Is it okay if I ask you a few things? I’m just pretty curious about your world.” I asked politely.

She still said nothing, and simply waited for the others.

“Oh come on Twi, I’m trying to get on with you here.” I said, giving her a playful nudge on the shoulder.

She instantly slapped my hand away and glared at me.

“Don’t touch me.” She growled.

“Alright, okay, I’m not looking for a fight here; I’d just like some general information, that’s all.” I said defensively, gesturing with my hands to show that I was backing down.

“Like what?” She asked, still hostile, but she understood that I was backing down.

“I don’t know, just general things, like, what was the last major event to happen in Equestria?” I shrugged.

Twilight tilted her head.

“Why do you want to know that?”

Why did she have to be so difficult? All I wanted was to get an idea of where the mane six were in their timeline, it had recently come to my attention that Twilight was still a unicorn, even though she became an alicorn at the end of season three. I had seen Equestria Girls and Season Four was halfway through airing now, so whatever timeline they were at it had to be between season one and three.

Come to think of it, I was pretty annoyed that I’d miss the end of the fourth season, I had a feeling the season finale was going to be a big one, it would probably Discord going corrupt again after being influenced by a new villain or something, probably involving Celestia and Luna becoming weak and helpless and only Twilight can save the day or something, maybe it’d be based on an episode from Generation One. Whatever it will have, no doubt it’ll contain a shed load of things for Hasbro to make toys out of…

“I’m just curious, that’s all.” I said with another shrug, coming back from my Season Four predictions.

She rolled her eyes, wrinkled her nose, and then huffed, as if talking to me was a burden.

“If you must know, we recently managed to reform the spirit of chaos, named Discord.” She explained.

Bloody hell, that was only two episodes before the end of season three, this whole Titan’s Orb situation must have happened only a day or two before the last episode!

“Impressive, that sounds like it took a lot of work.” I said, even though I’d seen the episode so I knew what happened, but praising her would help to reduce the tension between us for now.

“It did, but we succeeded, as we always do.” She said, lifting her chin in pride.

That comment was a little big headed and arrogant, but I’d let it go. Besides she had a point, in the show the six had overcome every problem that had appeared. Although this quest would be a little more difficult than what they were used to, while Earth didn’t have manticores, hydras and other mythological beasts, nor did it have magic and laser beams, it had challenges just as bad, perhaps even worse.

“So, Twilight, what do you think- GAH! What the heck!” I shouted as something hard hit the back of my head.

“Breakfast!” Rainbow Dash shouted at she emptied a small bucket of apples onto my head.

“Thank you Rainbow Dash.” I deadpanned, turning to face her.

“Anytime.” She giggled as she splattered two slices of bread against my cheeks.

The others then came in and took an apple each, Rarity then levitated some peanut butter over to me.

“If you like Equestrian marshmallows, wait until you try that.” She said with a smile.

“Where did you get all this from?” I asked as I undid the jar.

“We packed supplies that would last for months darling, our bags are enchanted like the tents, they’re bigger on the inside, my one even has a fridge.” She explained.

{Show off…} I thought, wanting an enchanted bag of my own.

“Magic one, humans zero!” Rainbow Dash giggled.

“Actually, our technology allowed me to contact Bruce, so that’s one point, plus I managed to master the teleportation spell on the second try, so that’s magic one, humanity two, I’m in the lead here.” I retorted with a smirk, before finishing off my sandwich.

“You want to bring in the details? We had the teleport spell in the first place, that’s one point. Twilight’s invisibility spell saved us from being caught by your police dudes, that’s another point. Magic three, humans two, so ha! In your face!” Rainbow sneered.

“Let it be three all, as you wouldn’t have been able to locate the first shard without the electrical spike from our airport.” I replied, taking a bite out of my apple.

“Nope, it’s four three, as that electric spike would be useless without Twilight’s spell to find it in the first place!” Dashie bit back.

“Is that so? Because I believe it was due to my online map that I knew which way to go, so it’s four all.” I countered.

“Are you two seriously having a competition on this?” Rarity asked, rolling her eyes.

“Yeah, it’s fun comparing our magic to human stuff and seeing which one is better.” Dash replied.

Now that she mentioned it, she was right, it really was fun comparing pony magic to human initiative.

“Well can it wait? We still need to try out this spell on Callum’s phone thingy.” Applejack mumbled with a mouthful of apple.

At that, Twilight tried to pick up my phone with her magic and take it, I quickly put my hand around it as it just started to lift into the air.

“Uh uh uuh, no snatching now Twilight.” I said, wiggling a finger at her.

“You only guide me, you do not command me.” Twilight growled, trying to pull my phone out of my hand with her magic.

To no avail, my strength was more powerful than her magic, and she could not take my phone.

“Whoa, did you just keep a hold on that thing? Twi’s magic is like, super strong.” Rainbow Dash asked, surprised by my strength.

“Well, believe it or not, mind over matter isn’t always the way forward, humanity five, magic four.” I grinned and I yanked the phone back, causing Twilight’s magic to be dispelled entirely.

“Hurry up already!” Twilight snapped, her patience finally meeting its end.

I finished off my apple and sat in front of Grumpy.

“Right, for this spell to work we need a certain method of accessing applications and scanning, so for now we’ll try scrolling.” I said.

I found my contacts section on my phone, and slid the screen so it was out of sight.

“Ok, I want you to search for ‘contacts’.” I ordered.

Twilight’s horn lit up, and my phone glowed purple, but the screen did nothing; I waited patiently, the others looked from the phone to Twilight to me. After a good ten seconds, Rainbow Dash gave a sigh.

“Great… It doesn’t work.” She huffed.

“Wait.” I said.

I looked at Twilight, and then at my phone screen; suddenly the screen slid across over to my contacts and highlighted as if it had been selected.

“Yes!” I yelled.

The others all gasped and all congratulated Twilight at once, they sat up straight and looked at me intently waiting for the next test.

“What now?” Twilight asked.

“Now that I know you can scan my phone and get the file you need, I’d like to see if you can open the application itself.” I said.

I scrolled through my phone until I found my Flappy Bird game.

“Ok Twilight, I want you to scan for ‘Flappy Bird’ and then to select it.” I commanded.

“Flappy bird, why?” Twilight questioned.

“It’s a digital game, just try to find it and select it.” I repeated.

Once again, her horn lit up, and so did my phone, after waiting a good ten seconds, my phone screen slid over to Flappy Bird, the application icon flashed as though it had been tapped, and the screen went black; a second later the Flappy Bird logo opened and the main menu appeared.

“Five all…” Rainbow Dash whispered into my ear.

“Ok, it works. Can we get to the airport and get going already?” Twilight asked.

“Let’s not travel at a hundred miles an hour Twilight, I’m telling you now, your impatience will be your downfall.” I replied.

“I’m going to be your downfall in a minute if we don’t get a move on.” She snapped back, glaring at me.

The others gasped and stared at Twilight in disbelief, they knew that wasn’t a joke. I on the other hand couldn’t take that threat seriously and burst into laughter.

“Oh Twilight, for such an old grump, you really know how to make a guy laugh!” I chuckled.

Twilight’s horn lit up, and the others gulped. I merely smiled.

“Now now Twilight, don’t you need to conserve your magic for the flight? Wouldn’t want to freeze to death now would we?” I asked, tilting my head on one side.

Within an instant her magic dispelled, and she growled.

“Nice doggy. Nice doggy.” I said, putting my hands out in case she decided to launch herself at me.

The others giggled; which was when Twilight stood up and walked past me and out of the tent, levitating her saddle bag next to her.

“Alright fillies, breakfast over, let’s get this show on the road, or in the air to be more specific.” I said.

The others all finished off their breakfast, which included Pinkie jamming an entire slice of cake into her mouth. We all picked up our bags and left the tent.
Once outside, Rarity used a spell to fold all of the bedding and remove all the apple cores. Then we all got to work on packing up the tents, Pinkie hopped around pulling all the strings loose and I pulled the pegs out.

Within a good five minutes they were ready for shrinking.

“Speed and efficiency, now if only we worked like this all the time…” Rarity sighed.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Oh, it’s just since we came here the group haven’t really pulled their weight. I’ve had to cook alongside Applejack, I have to clean everything, Applejack also helped put up the tents, but the others did nothing. Fluttershy just wanted to study the animal life, Rainbow Dash sat on the clouds and just watched all your cars and other things, claiming to be ‘scouting’, Pinkie just ate things, and Twilight was busy monitoring you.” She explained.

I had a lot of time for Rarity, and I understood where she was coming from. As much as the objective was to monitor me, the work behind the scenes of providing food and shelter deserved some credit.

“Well, I think things will be a lot easier now that we’re on the move.” I replied with a sympathetic smile.

“I hope so.” She said.

“I know so.” I replied, giving her a quick pat on the shoulder before putting my bag onto my back.

I was still nervous about touching the ponies, half the time I expected my hand to go right through them and for me to wake up. This was the Mane Six, they were almost sacred in my eyes.

“Alright team, let’s move!” Rainbow Dash called out.

At that, we all gave ourselves a little shake, and headed towards the fence. Twilight had a head start, but her fear of this world caused her to slow right down so we could catch up, despite her hostile mood, she felt a lot safer with her friends.

After a good ten minute walk we reached the fence, an Easyjet plane came in for landing just as we got there.

“I hadn’t realised how big they were…” Rarity mumbled as she watched the plane land.

“That’s what she said!” Rainbow Dash called out.

Applejack and I burst into laughter, while Rarity was furious.

“Rainbow Dash! How dare you be so vulgar!” She yelled.

“Oh come on, that was perfect timing!” Dashie giggled back.

“It’s vulgar Rainbow Dash, and highly inappropriate! Pinkie and Fluttershy are standing right next to you!” Rarity continued to shout.

“Yeah Dashie! I’m standing right next to you!” Pinkie shouted. “What are we talking about?”

“Never mind Pinkie.” Dash said, pulling a nervous grin.

“Okie dokie lokie!” Pinkie replied and bounced away to bother Applejack.

Fluttershy followed Pinkie, saying nothing. Rarity then punched Rainbow Dash in the leg.

“What is wrong with you?” Rarity hissed into Rainbow’s ear.

“What? It was just a joke.” Dash replied defensively.

“Time and place Rainbow Dash, you know just as well as I do that Pinkie is still innocent to all that stuff.” Rarity scolded.

“Alright, alright, fine, I won’t do it again.” Rainbow said, backing down.

“See to it that you don’t.” Rarity growled, her nose pushed against Rainbow’s.

As well timed as Rainbow Dash’s comment was, Rarity was right, if Pinkie was still innocent then Dash shouldn’t have said it, or she could have at least whispered it to Applejack and I.

“How do we get in? And how do we find this computer?” Twilight asked.

“We’ve got two options, we cross this fence and head directly for the back door, it’s a little risky but it means we could have the information we need within the hour. Our other option is to walk in the front door and find the door to a restricted area, but that will take much longer and there will be thousands of humans there, airports are busy places.” I explained.

“How is using the back door risky?” Twilight asked.

“That’s what she sai- OW!” Rainbow Dash shouted as I gave her a cuff on the back of the head.

“Hey! That hurt!” She yelped.

“That’s the point, now keep your trap shut if you’re going to make those sort of jokes.” I said.

“You laughed before…” She moaned.

“That was before, this is now.” I replied.

I looked back to Twilight, who was waiting for me to answer with a dull look.

“To answer your question Twilight, it’s risky because if I get caught in a restricted area the guards are inclined to kill me on sight, terrorism is taken very seriously on Earth.” I explained.

Rarity gasped and took a step back.

“What happens to us if we’re caught?” Twilight asked, gulping.

“You don’t need to worry about that, because you won’t. Just focus on getting that data quickly.” I reassured her.

“So why mention that you might get caught?” She asked.

“Because once inside the building you’re taking the invisibility spell off me to conserve your magic, otherwise you won’t have enough mana for the flight.” I said.

“I see…” Twilight mumbled, more to herself than to me.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea sugarcube? It sounds like too big a risk…” Applejack asked nervously.

“It’s the fastest way.” I said.

“That’s not what I asked.” Applejack replied quietly.

“If he gets caught, it’s his fault and we leave him behind, let's get a move on.” Twilight ordered.

“Hey, that’s mean!” Pinkie squeaked.

“It’s necessary.” Twilight replied.

“I’m with Heartless, let’s move.” I said.

Even though Twilight, or, 'Heartless', was being spiteful and didn’t care about my wellbeing, she was right in some sense; the other ponies didn’t quite see the importance of this mission, to be honest, neither did I, but Twilight sure did, hence why she was acting so nastily. If the orb was stolen and sent to Earth, something was clearly planning to harm Equestria, I don’t know what it was, but if it could go as far as sending the orb to another universe, it was powerful, very powerful.

Twilight used her magic to make a portal in the fence line, and stepped through, I followed her.

“Is it a good idea to all go? Why not Callum and Twilight?” Rarity suggested.

“If you leave those two alone, only one will come back alive.” Rainbow Dash joked.

“Seriously, why? There’s less chance of being caught.” Rarity pointed out.

“That’s a good point…” I mumbled. “You guys stay here, Twilight, let’s just get what we need and get out quickly.” I said.

“Don’t tell me what to do.” She growled.

“It was a plan, not an order.” I replied.

She merely huffed and cast the cloaking spell on us; I felt, and saw no difference, but I was clearly invisible as the others were looking around, then shrugged, and headed back into the woodland.

“Where’s the back door?” She asked.

“My guess is near that flight tower.” I said.

“Let’s go then.” She ordered.

“Don’t tell me what to do.” I said, mimicking Twilight’s voice.

Twilight said nothing, she only growled, I could see a purple haze around her so I could see where she was.

“Twilight, I can see some purple fuzz around you, is that normal?” I asked.

“Yes, it’s because you’re also under the spell.” She replied, talking to me as if I was an idiot.

I simply nodded, even though it was pointless, and headed across the runway with her. Truth be told, I was bloody terrified at this moment in time, I knew I was invisible, but to run across a runway and to break into secured areas made my spine tingle a little.

It took a good few minutes to get to the flight tower, and just as predicted, there was a key coded door on the building opposite it.

“Now what?” She asked.

“Use the spell on that device there, with all the numbers, under the key word, ‘code’.” I said.

The number plate glowed purple, and suddenly buzzed; for a second I thought Twilight screwed it up and we were going to be compromised. Then, much to my surprise, the door lock clicked.

“One, nine, two, seven, four, nine, nine four, thank you very much…” Twilight mumbled to herself.

I took a deep breath, and looked at Twilight.

“Well,” I sighed, “Let’s get ourselves a ride to Brazil…”

With no further ado, I opened the door…

Author's Note

Who wants a Threezie!?

Chapter Eleven: The Gatwick Heist

Chatper Eleven - Magical Airport Ninjas

Upon opening the door and walking inside, I found the first room to be empty, there were just a load of wires and pipes, along with some stairs to the second level, I looked up the stairs and noticed a CCTV camera on the first floor.

“We can’t turn off the spell here, there’s a camera up there.” I whispered to Twilight.

I knew the original plan was to deactivate the spell to conserve mana, but I guess we’d have to take the risk of keeping the spell on to prevent getting caught here.

“Where to now?” She asked.

“Let’s see where these stairs take us.” I said.

We quickly and quietly crept up the stairs, on the first floor we found more stairs, and a door with a sign saying ‘maintenance room’.

“No use in there, we need to find some sort of control room.” I said.

Twilight said nothing, and simply followed me up the stairs, my heart was racing, I was expecting a guard to come and catch me any second now; my hands were shaking and I felt a big tingle up my spine.
We got to the second floor, where there was another door labelled ‘Server room’.

“Let’s try in here.” I whispered.

I slowly opened the door, luckily there were no people inside, but there were no computers either, just a load of routers, a shed load of wires, and other technical equipment.

“Nothing in here, next floor.” I said.

As I turned and headed up the stairs, I heard a groan of frustration from someone, and it wasn’t Twilight.

“Get back, quickly, against the wall.” I quietly hissed to Twilight.

We swiftly slinked against the wall at the stairs just as a pair of feet came into sight.

“For goodness sake… Graham do this, Graham do that… Do it yourself you lazy bastard, maintenance isn’t even my job…” The man mumbled to himself.

He was a rather fat man with a large nose, and had a big bald patch on the back of his head and a noticeable wart on his chin.
He waddled down the stairs and then down the stairs beyond that, so no doubt he was going to the maintenance room.

“Right, let’s move.” I whispered.

We continued up the stairs to the third floor and found what we were looking for, the control room. I put my ear to the door to hear two voices inside.

“There are people in there, what do we do?” I asked.

“I don’t know!” She growled back, rather loudly.

“Sshh, do you want us to get caught?” I growled.

I looked around frantically, then had an idea.

“Twilight, I’m going to knock on the door, when it opens, find your chance and get in there.” I ordered.

“I’m not going in there alone, do you think I’m stupid enough to trust you?” She growled.

“I never said you’re going alone, just find your chance and get in, I’ll knock twice if need to be.” I replied.

“Fine.” She mumbled.

“Ready?” I asked.

She said nothing, so I could only assume that she was. I put my hand to the door, and knocked three times.
Five seconds later, the door opened. A man stood in the doorway, he was tall, thin, and had a huge chin, his fringe was swept across to one side, making it look like an ocean wave.

“Why hello! Oh, hello? Who’s there?” He asked openly, looking around.

“Who is it Harry?” A woman called from inside.

“I don’t know poppet, there’s no one out here.” The man replied.

“It’s probably just Graham messing around, not wanting to sort those fuses out.” The woman suggested.

“What a sausage…” The man said before shutting the door.

“What now?” Twilight hissed with frustration.

I ignored her and knocked on the door a second time. A few seconds later the man named Harry opened the door quickly.

“What is it now?” He called out.

He looked around and huffed.

“That’s it Graham…” He said before stepping out the door.

As quick as a flea Twilight and I crept behind him and into the room, Harry then closed the door behind us. Inside the room there were a few desks, some office chairs, and about seven computers, in the middle of the room the woman was sitting at a computer, typing in some things.

“Those guys…” She mumbled to herself.

The telephone next to her on the desk started to ring; she picked it up and answered.

“Hello? Yeah. It’s Kinder, the others are busy, uh huh, right…” She said before engaging a full conversation with whoever was contacting her.

“The computer in the far corner.” I whispered to Twilight.

We both scuttled over to the corner of the room, the computer was on and was on the main desktop.

“Use the keyword ‘database’.” I whispered.

Twilight crouched beneath the desk so her magic wouldn’t be seen and began to do her work. The computer screen started to fuzz and the cursor darted around, a second later a selection of applications and documents came up, one of which was titled ‘Gatwick_Flight_Database.apdtb’ I took the mouse and double clicked on it, the database opened up and the whole screen changed to an application. I started seeing a shed load of numbers, country names, aeroplane company names, a clock, a radar, some sort of map, and a large number of connection bars at the bottom left corner of the screen.

“What do I do?” Twilight whispered.

I clicked on a bar at the top of the screen that had a magnifying glass, making it clear that it was a search bar, and typed in Brazil.
Nothing came up.

“Search for Brazil.” I ordered.

Twilight did as I asked, but her results were no better than mine.

“Nothing… There’s nothing.” She said, her breathing rate increasing, it was at this point where I realised she was just as scared as I was, maybe even more.

{Think Callum, think!} I thought to myself.

“Do the airports in Brazil have names?” She asked.

“Yes, but I don’t know them.” I replied.

Then an idea hit me… Names, locations, places in Brazil that might show up.

“Come on, hurry up, I can’t hold this spell forever.” Twilight hissed, getting even more worked up, she was going to hyperventilate at this point.
“I’m thinking, I’m thinking…” I whispered back.

{What’s the name of the place with the giant Jesus dude? Favela? No! That’s a Modern Warfare Two map!} I angrily thought to myself, trying desperately to think of a name.

The door to the control room opened and Harry walked back in, causing Twilight and I to jump.

“Apparently it wasn’t him.” He said, sitting down and opening a packet of crackers.

“How can you eat those? They’re so dry and tasteless…” The woman asked, pretending to gag.

“I like my crackers!” He squawked.

“Pfft, I need to call you Polly from now on, you’re like a bloody parrot…” The woman said, rolled her eyes.

{Parrots live in Brazil… Harry’s hair is like a wave, waves are blue, there’s a parrot called Blu in the film Rio!} I screamed in thought, almost aloud.

“Search for Rio.” I said to Twilight.

She did so, and there were no results.

“Nothing…” She whimpered, now getting herself really worked up.

“There must be… How are you spelling it?” I asked.

“R, E, E, O, H.” She answered.

“Spell it with R, I, O.” I ordered.

The screen once again flashed, and there it was, result we had been looking for. Flight TC, BRZL, Seven, Nine, Two. Rio de Janeiro.

“Got you...” I sighed in relief.

“It’s in one hour.” Twilight said, which upon looking at the screen showed that she was correct, fifty eight minutes to be precise; it was a Thomas Cook plane.

I took my phone out of my pocket to find it wasn’t invisible, not to my eyes anyway; I went to my stopwatch app and started it, causing it to beep.

“What was that?” The woman asked.

{Fuck!} I thought to myself, putting my phone back in my pocket.

Harry stood up and headed over to us, I quickly closed the application. I ducked down and stood absolutely still, next to me I could hear Twilight breathing quickly and faintly, full of fear.

“Shh…” I whispered as quietly as I could.

Harry looked around, saw nothing and shrugged.

“You must have been hearing things.” He said and walked back to his chair to eat more crackers.

Suddenly Twilight’s horn fizzled and the invisibility spell wore off; I looked her, and she looked at me, both of us petrified.

“What have you done?” I whispered angrily.

“The time on the spell wore off.” She replied, gulping.

“Cast another, quickly.” I hissed.

“I can’t, my magic would be too loud, and I can’t spare any more mana, or I won’t be able to provide enough when we’re airborne, we’ll die.” She whispered back.

I quickly went back to the computer and typed ‘camera’ into the search bar.

“What are you doing?” She asked, looking side to side in fear.

“I’m going to try disabling the cameras so we won’t get caught.” I answered.

In the results I found a single application called ‘CCTVCameraControl.exe’, I double clicked on it and was greeted with the same layout as the database, but the records was replaced with a single drop box, I clicked on it and it had a load of different options. Flight Tower, Office, Passenger Seating, blah blah blah… I scrolled down until I found ‘Rear Stairwell’. I clicked on that and was greeted with five screens, one camera for each floor, I found the floor I was on and selected the camera, and then noticed a button next to the camera name that said ‘deactivate’. I selected all the cameras on the stairwell and shut them all down, I then turned off the camera outside the airport as well so we wouldn't be spotted when running away.

Within a few seconds the telephone next to the woman rang, she picked it up and listened to what was said.

“Well there’s only me and Harry in here, and we haven’t touched them.” She said.

“What is it?” Harry asked, tilting his head on one side.

“We’ll sort it out.” The woman said, putting down the phone and looked to Harry. “Roger’s saying the cameras outside and on the stairs have been turned off from this room.”

I gulped.

“I’ll go outside and check.” Harry said, opening the door and leaving the room.

Thankfully he left the door wide open, we had one shot at this, or it would be all over. I picked up a pencil from the desk and looked around the corner at the woman, I waited until she looked at her own computer, and then I threw the pencil so that it went over her head and clattered against the wall behind her.

The trick worked like a charm, the woman turned around and looked at the wall to find the source of the sound; the second she turned around Twilight and I dashed forward and out the door, we made it.

“Now what?” She whispered.

“Downstairs and out.” I replied.

“But what about the other human?” She asked.

Just as she mentioned him, Harry came back up the stairs. I hurried up to the fourth floor and sat there, Twilight followed. Harry went back into the control room and shut the door. Without saying a word I headed down the stairs, I stopped on the first floor to check if Twilight was ok; she was right behind me, still scared without her invisibility spell.

“Who the heck are you?” A guy asked behind me.

I turned to see the fat man, Graham, looking directly at me, he then looked at Twilight.

“And what the heck is that?” He asked.

I stood there and calmly looked back at him, trying to look like I was allowed here.

“Just a delivery boy, Harry and Kinder want this thing in the office.” I said.

Upon mentioning his colleagues, he loosened up and assumed I had permission to be on the premises.

“What is that thing?” He asked once more.

“If you closely, you’ll see it’s clearly a unicorn.” I replied.

“It looks alive.” He said.

“Totally.” I deadpanned, trying to pass her off as a large plushie.

I looked at Twilight and kicked her in the leg, she froze solid and didn’t even flinch, she didn’t even blink. I smirked at finally being able to get back at her and her not being able to do anything about it.

“So it’s like a big plush or something?” He asked.

“Pretty much.” I replied.

I can’t believe this guy was taking the bait, he was denser than I thought; it was at that time when Twilight sneezed. She jumped up and shook her head, then realised what she had done and here pupils shrunk in terror, she looked at Graham and gulped.

“It… It… It is alive!” Graham shouted.

I had no time for words now, we had been spotted, and we would surely be compromised if I didn’t take action; it was about time I put my boxing experience to good use. I darted forward, punched Graham in the gut, causing him to bend over in pain, I then twisted my body and gave him an uppercut to the jaw, sending him down the stairs and into an unconscious heap.

Twilight stood there, her mouth agape, unable to take in what she had just seen; I nudged her shoulder, causing her to look at me.

“Move, now.” I ordered.

We rushed down the stairs and past Graham.

“Nothing personal mate…” I mumbled as I opened the back door.

I held the door open for Twilight, who ran out and didn’t stop running, she ran for the fence, I shut the door behind me and bolted as well; I was a good runner, due to having long legs, and had to sprint for only a couple of seconds to zoom past Twilight.

We got to the fence to find the others waiting on the other side, Twilight used another portal spell and we passed through, she fell to her knees and began to pant, trying to recover her breath; I on the other hand was not out of breath, I was running on the spot throwing punches into the air.

“Hell yeah! This is awesome! I’ve never felt so alive!” I shouted.

The adrenaline coursing through my veins had never been so strong, the excitement never being so intense; I had just crept inside an airport, taken intelligence, disabled security cameras and knocked someone out. It was like a bloody action movie!

“What happened?” Rainbow Dash asked, her eyes wide with curiosity.

“Well, I was a ninja, and then I did some ninja stuff.” I said with a big grin.

“Come on, what happened?” Dash persisted, desperate to know.

I ignored her and pulled some sunglasses out of my bag, which we had left by the fence before we set out.

“The name’s Bond… James Bond…” I said seductively, lowering my sunglasses slightly with a finger.

Dash responded by hitting me in the arm, pretty hard actually.

“Tell me!” She whined.

“I’ll tell you when we’re on the plane.” I replied, rubbing my arm.

Dash sat down and huffed.

“Fine.”

“Alrighty then, our ride is in about forty five minutes.” I said, continuing to bounce around in excitement.

“What do we do in the meantime?” Rarity asked.

“We wait.” Twilight huffed, still catching her breath.

“Boring! I want to race Callum to see who’s faster out of our kind!” Rainbow Dash shouted.

To be perfectly honest, that was a pretty good idea, a bloody brilliant idea.

“I’m up for that. No flying though.” I said, poking Dash’s wing.

“Fine…” She moaned, rolling her eyes.

“Mind if I join y’all?” Applejack asked.

“By all means!” I happily replied.

Pinkie then jumped forward and was automatically appointed as the referee.

“Follow me to the start point! First one back here wins!” She squeaked and bounced away, we all shrugged and followed her.

She ended leading us to where our old camp was, which was about half a mile from our current location at the fence. She pulled some chalk out of her mane and drew a line in the ground. I looked at her, dumbfounded. I shook my head and remember that this was Pinkie Pie, there was all sorts of stuff hidden in her mane. I wouldn’t be surprised if she kept her Element of Harmony in there…

“Okie dokie lokie, first one back wins!” She yelled.

I got down like an Olympic runner, I noticed Dash and Applejack do the same.

“Three!”

I stretched my calf muscles.

“Two!”

I took a deep breath.

“One!”

I stared at the path ahead and tightened every muscle in my body, ready for a sprint.

“GO!” Pinkie screamed.

The three of us bolted, I sprinted as fast as I could, my arms swung back and forth as I gained momentum and glided across the ground. To my right I caught a glimpse of a rainbow coloured mane and knew Dash was right next to me, I could hear her hooves gallop on the dirt beneath us, this was intense.
To my left I could hear a heavier pair of hooves behind me and knew Applejack was right on my tail, being a farm worker had led to her legs becoming awfully strong, along with naturally being strong from her species as an earth pony, on the other hand Dash was thinner and lighter on her hooves as a pegasus. These two pony types were equally matched, despite their differences, I was not a pony, but I had my traits as well. I was a lot like Applejack, I was quite broad and was good at heavy lifting, making my legs very strong, but at the same time I was a good sprinter and light on my toes like Rainbow dash, this race was going to be very close.

A few yards ahead lay a fallen tree that was about waist height, Pinkie had purposely made this part of the track, as we approached it I noticed Rainbow Dash jump up then flap her wings once, giving her a large boost, she cleared the log and took the lead. I saw this as cheating, but it only made me more eager to win. I vaulted the log and kept running, we were very close to the finish line.
No more than twenty seconds later I could see the others waiting for us, upon seeing Dash a metre or two in front of me made me give one final push of desperation to win, I burst into a much stronger sprint, and I zoomed forward, in seconds I came alongside the pegasus, she noticed me and went into a sprint of her own, she managed to get a little further ahead but no more than half a metre. I gave one final burst of energy and sprinted at my absolute maximum and managed to pass Dash, but by then it was too late, we had both crossed the finish line; I skidded to a halt and almost collided with Rarity, who had jumped out of the way just in time.

I put my hands on my knees to support myself and began to breathe deeply to pay off the oxygen debt, even I had my limits when it came to stamina.

“Oh yeah! I did it! Woohoohoo!” Rainbow Dash cheered.

I tried to speak up, but I needed a minute to get my breath back.

“Stick to marshmallows two legs, I’m the fastest around here!” Dash continued to cheer.

“Only ‘cus you cheated!” Applejack puffed from behind us.

“Did not!” Dash shouted defensively.

“Well, you did use your wings at the jump.” Rarity pointed out.

“You weren’t even there!” Dash growled.

Rarity’s horn lit up and a magical projection appeared next to her, like a hologram, and it replayed the race, showing Dash flap her wings at the jump and proving that she cheated. Before anyone could say anything, Twilight walked through the projection, causing it to fizzle and disappear.

“The human is a selfish creature that can’t take losing, end of story; now if you actually care about Equestria and our extremely important mission, you would have noticed the aeroplane with Thomas Cook written on the side of it. That’s the one we need to take, and it leaves in fifteen minutes; so get your things and make a move.” She ordered.

Although Twilight was a massive party pooper, she had a point, regardless of her barbed comment.

“I wouldn’t say Callum can’t take losing, he hasn’t even complained.” Applejack mentioned.

“I said get your things, not question me about your pathetic little competitions!” Twilight barked, causing Fluttershy to jump out of her skin.

Applejack was about to argue, but I quickly shook my head at her. Twilight turned around and levitated her saddle bag onto her back, she fastened the belt, and then used a spell to literally burn a hole through the metal fence; so much for saving mana.

“Don’t worry, we’ll have a rematch at another time.” I quietly said to Applejack.

She looked at me dully without saying a word, she was still clearly annoyed by Twilight’s outburst; I walked over to Fluttershy and knelt down to her height.

“You ok?”

She gave a tiny nod, which was reasonably good for Fluttershy’s standards; I stood up and gave her a small pat on the shoulder, like I had to Rarity before.

“Alright everypony, it’s time to fly!” I announced. I loved the fact I could now say ‘everypony’ without it being weird.

The others were all ready, their bags on their backs. I slung my rucksack onto my back and stepped through the hole in the fence that Twilight had so nicely created. I looked over to the Thomas Cook plane to see a long vehicle alongside it, a man was hauling people’s luggage onto a conveyor belt into the cargo hold, which was our destination.

“Twilight, put the invisibility spell on us, there are humans over at the plane.” I ordered.

Twilight was too afraid of being caught to challenge me and obeyed, our bodies fizzled and phased out, I could only tell where the others were by the purple glows around their bodies.

“Get us there quickly, human; I can’t sustain this spell for long if we want to survive in the air.” Twilight snarled.

“Very well, pony.” I replied and jogged towards the plane, once again ignoring her foul attitude.

As everyone caught up and kept pace with me, I decided to speed up into a run, we got to the conveyor belt and the others crowded around me.

“We need to get on that belt, and fast, they’re almost done loading the plane.” I explained to the six, not loud enough for the men to hear.

Rainbow Dash did not need to be told twice, she crept past the man loading luggage onto the belt and sat on the belt and slid up and into the plane. I honestly didn’t expect her to go ahead and jump on that quickly, I guess she really was the ‘who dares wins’ character of the group.
After seeing Dash get on, Applejack and Pinkie followed, then Fluttershy and Rarity.

“Is that the lot?” The man shouted to another man behind the vehicle.

“Three more!” He called back.

“Twilight, get on.” I hissed.

She was motionless, it was as if the size of the plane and all the noise had petrified her. I was left with no other option.

“Sorry about this.” I whispered and I swung my hand forward and slapped Twilight on the side of the head.

She yelped and turned to me, I didn’t need to see her face to know she was absolutely livid.

“You just fu-”

I cut her off by grabbing her muzzle tightly.

“Get on that belt, right now. Or you get left behind.” I growled.

I let go of her muzzle and she quickly hopped onto the belt, now terrified out of her wits; I jumped on behind her and slid upwards to the cargo door.
The cargo hold was bigger than I had expected it to be, Twilight slid off the belt and fell down onto a suitcase, landing on her chest and giving a loud “Oof!” I misjudged my timing and fell in the same fashion as Twilight and landed on my shoulder right next to her.
Her spell turned off and I looked around to see Pinkie bouncing on some large elastic tubing, Rainbow Dash and Applejack were quizzing one another on sports, and Fluttershy was crouched down between two suitcases next to Rarity.

I turned back to find Twilight glaring at me, her lips curved up into a snarl.

“Yeah… About that slap…” I said sheepishly.

She only glared harder at me, her breathing sounding like small grunts.

“Twilight, I only did that because it was necessary, you froze and I needed you to move there and then.” I tried to explain.

She stood up and I thought she was just going to blank me, she walked past me and I thought it was over, when suddenly she lifted her hind legs and bucked me in the face, causing me to jolt back and cry out. It hurt more than anything before, probably more than when I sniffed the Kuphila Amanzi; the whole front of my face felt like it was burning and my lips puffed up.
She dived into me and attempted to hit me repeatedly; I put my hands over my head to shield myself from the beating.

“Necessary! I’ll show you necessary you runt! You demented pig!” She screamed.

Before she could hit me any further, Rainbow Dash whizzed over and pulled her back.

“Twilight stop! What the heck is wrong with you?” She yelled.

Applejack rushed over and also helped to restrain her.

“Alright Twi, simmer down.” Applejack said.

Twilight tried to shake her off.

“Get off me!” She shrieked.

Applejack then lost her temper and grabbed Twilight and forced her to the ground and put her lips to her ear.

“You’re acting like you have a mental problem Twi; Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie don’t need to see this, they don’t need their best friend being violent in front of them, so when I tell you to simmer down, I mean simmer the fuck down; ok?” She hissed.

She took a step back to let Twilight stand, upon standing she glared at me, her lips and nose twitched with rage. After a few seconds she gave a loud grunt in frustration and spat at me, she then trotted off to the other side of the cargo hold; Rainbow Dash then flew over to my side and helped me sit up.

“Dude, are you ok?” She asked.

I wiped my face with my wrist to find my nose was bleeding, quite badly too, but at least it wasn’t broken.

“I’m fine.” I mumbled.

“Care to tell me what that was all about?” Applejack asked as she approached me.

I gave a small groan and wiped my nose again before I answered.

“She refused to get on the belt and we only had a few seconds left or we wouldn’t have made it on, she froze like a block of ice, I slapped her to get her to come to her senses and get on.” I explained.

“It’s about time she got a slap.” Rainbow Dash giggled.

Applejack on the other hand wasn’t impressed.

“Callum, she hates you as it is, hitting her ain’t going to get her to like you any faster, and I don’t approve you hurting my friends, even if they are being difficult.” She said, looking rather angry.

“Yeah, I know, but I had to-”

“But, nothing.” Applejack interrupted, “You could have got her attention without hurting her; you two have had tension from the moment you met. You’ve wanted to get back at her, and you saw the opportunity to hurt her and you took it.” She scolded.

“It wasn’t like that Applejack.” I said defensively.

“It was exactly like that, it would have only taken a nudge of the shoulder to get her to listen, not a slap.” She continued.

“Alright, maybe I got frustrated and acted a little too hasty.” I admitted, taking on what she was saying.

“There’s no maybe Callum, you’re in the wrong, now own up to it.” Applejack demanded.

“Ok, ok, I’m sorry.” I apologised.

“It’s not me you need to be sorry to.” Applejack said, turning around and walking over to talk with Rarity.

I wrinkled my nose and got up. I instantly felt Rainbow Dash pull my arm in attempt to help me.

“Hey, don’t listen to her, Applejack just likes to play the mother in this group.” She said.

“What do you mean?” I asked, licking some blood off my lower lip.

“Well, she enjoys the mother role, and likes to look after everypony and treat them like her kids or something; she’s been doing it for years with her little sister Applebloom.” Dash explained.

“Why does she do that?” I questioned with great curiosity.

“I don’t really know, I guess she’s been like it since… Since…” Rainbow Dash stopped and looked at the ground, she quickly licked her lips as they had gone dry.

“Since what?” I pressed.

“Look, dude, it’s not really my place to tell you, and AJ is really sensitive about it; she’ll tell when she’s ready to.” She said, giving a small sigh.

I nodded and didn’t press any further. I didn’t need to, it didn’t take a genius to work out what Dash had meant. I remembered yesterday when I planned to fake my own death and Applejack started to get emotional. Death was definitely the reason behind Applejack’s mothering behaviour. I assumed the worst and figured that Applejack’s parents had died, which was actually rather plausible as nothing is ever heard from her parents in the TV show. It was quite heart breaking to think about.

Without warning the plane’s engines started up and the whole cargo hold began to gently rumble, Fluttershy squeaked loudly and bolted towards the nearest pony possible, which was Rarity.

“What’s going on?” She yelped.

The others started to look around frantically, full of fear.

“Alright everypony, calm down, the plane’s starting up, that’s all.” I called out.

That calmed them all down, besides Twilight.

“He’s lying! We’re all going to die! This is a murder chamber!” She yelled.

Fluttershy screamed and sprinted to the cargo door, which was now closed.

“For fuck sake Twilight…” I muttered under my breath.

I jogged over to Fluttershy and put a hand on her shoulder.

“Fluttershy, look at me.”

She did as I asked, tears were in the corners of her eyes.

“Twilight doesn’t know this world, she makes all the comments and assumptions because she’s scared, just as scared as you are. But you are safe. I promise you.” I told her soothingly.

“Oh now look at the human! Filling Fluttershy’s head with lies, so she doesn’t call for help!” Twilight continued to yell.

I gently patted Fluttershy’s shoulder before walking towards Twilight; Applejack frowned at looked from me to Twilight constantly, checking to see if she should intervene.

“Th-That’s close enough…” Twilight stuttered.

It was there and then that I realised she wasn’t simply afraid of me, she was one hundred percent terrified of me; as much as this fact saddened me, I felt like I could use it to my advantage in the many days to come.
I walked right up to Twilight, who in turn backed up to the edge of the cargo hold and gulped; I squatted down and looked her in the eye, my nose had stopped bleeding but my entire lip area was still covered in drying blood, I basically had a blood goatee.

“Listen here… You don’t like me, and from here onward, I don’t like you either, but for the sake of Fluttershy and Pinkie, I’m not going to start a fight. Like Applejack said, no violence for them. But you are causing Fluttershy to freak out, if you really care about your friends, you’d shut up and stop filling their heads with fear.” I hissed to her.

She didn’t speak, she didn’t even blink, her quivering lips were the only sign of movement.

“What makes you think I want you dead so badly? If this were a ‘murder chamber’ as you called it, why would I have jumped in with you?
I don’t know what Celestia has told you, but if you truly believe that I want to kill you, then what she’s told you is wrong.
Now, if you want to be reason for our deaths, sit here and be the paranoid little bitch you’ve been since we met.
Alternatively, if you want us to get to Brazil alive, and progress in protecting your world, then get to the centre of this cargo hold, and cast your pressure stability spell. I want to hear nothing from you if it isn’t positive, are we clear?” I finished.

Once again, she was frozen solid.

“Are… We… Clear…?” I asked again, tilting my head on one side.

She nervously nodded and gulped again.

“Good…” I whispered, in such a calm, quiet tone that it sounded rather psychotic.

I stood up and clapped my hands, causing Twilight to flinch.

“Alright everypony, I’ve got some good news and some bad news!
Good news is, we’re not going to die! Bad news is, none! It’s all good!” I called.

Pinkie cheered and pulled a party horn out of her mane and blew it, causing the others to laugh. I headed over to the group and sat down next to Rarity; the others all in turn sat around me.

“When do we take off?” Dash asked.

As if her words had triggered it, the aeroplane started moving, a slight jolt at first, and then a smaller continuous shake.

“Right now it would seem.” I said, almost having to shout due to the volume.

The plane’s engines started to screech as the vehicle began to zoom across the runway.

“Hey Twilight, do you want to get your spell up and running before we drift off to an eternal slumber?” I called over to the purple unicorn, who hadn’t moved from her last position.

She got up and slowly waddled over to the rest of the group. She sat down without uttering a word.

“What’s up Sparkler? Why the long face?” Pinkie chirped, tilting her head on one side.

Before anything else could be said, the aeroplane left the runway and we were all temporally lifted into the air, Pinkie decided to jump at the same time and was sent flying to the other side of the cargo bay, Rainbow Dash simply flapped her wings so she was unaffected, Twilight slid a good two metres across the floor, Fluttershy and Rarity held on to the suitcases so not much happened for them, while Applejack hurtled forward into me, we tumbled around a bit until the plane finally levelled out.

I ended up on my back with Applejack on top of me; she didn’t seem to notice I was there.

“Whooee! Now that was a take off!” She cheered.

“Applejack.” I said with a dull tone.

She looked down and saw my head being half flattened by her chest.

“Oh, hehe, howdy there partner.” She chuckled.

She stood up and hopped to one side so I could stand up, I looked around to see the majority of the group back where they were before, except for Pinkie, who was nowhere to be seen.

“Is everyone alright?” I called.

Everyone gave nods and there was a ‘yes’ or two, and then I heard a mumble from behind me; I turned around to see a pile of suitcases moving, I hurried over there and moved the cases aside to find Pinkie Pie giggling out of her wits.

“Oh my gosh that was so fun! Can we do it again? I flew! It was super fun! Please can we do it again!?” She squealed in delight.

I laughed at her enthusiasm and pulled her out of the pile, I checked her over to ensure she wasn’t hurt, and then we walked back to the others.

“Can we get the spell up yet? It’s cold as my mother’s heart in here!” I joked.

Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Applejack and even Fluttershy laughed at the comment and all agreed that the temperature was dropping, and that the air was getting quite thin.
Twilight’s horn began to glow and a large spark of energy landed on the ground in the middle of us, it expanded into a large bubble and it became easy to breathe again. Twilight then used another spell, which caused a reddish pink light to shoot from her horn into everyone, and I suddenly felt a great sense of warmth, it was like I had been wrapped in a large woollen blanket. I looked at the others to find they all had a slight orange glow around them, it almost made them look cartoon again. I looked at my own hands to find they had the same glow, it was like the thick black outlines in Borderlands Two, but in orange instead.

“This is some freaky shit right here…” I mumbled to myself.

Rainbow Dash heard me and giggled, she gave me a nudge to get my attention.

“So how long until we get to Brazil?” She asked.

“About five to seven hours, maybe more.” I replied.

Being a very impatient pony, my estimated time brought a frustrated sigh to Dash; but I saw the time given as an opportunity to learn more about real life Equestria compared to the show.

“Hey guys, how about we take time to tell some of our best life stories and cool stuff that’s happened in our lives?” I asked.

“What do you mean?” Rarity asked.

Before I could answer, Pinkie came over to me and hugged me.

“I have loads of life stories, I’ll start with my first one! I was born on a Tuesday…” She said.

“You know she won’t stop right?” Rainbow Dash said, rolling her eyes.

“I have an idea!” Rarity piped from out of the blue.

“And that is?” I queried.

“Let’s see how long you can cope with Pinkie telling you her entire life story!” She sang, banging her hooves together.

“That’s a great idea!” Pinkie squeaked, “I’ll start right now!”

“Now now, let’s not decide on that too-”

“Now then, as I said, I was born on a Tuesday.” Pinkie interrupted, “From day one I liked sugar! Ponies tell me I have no way of knowing I liked sugar because I didn’t actually eat any, but I know deep down in my Pinkie heart that I loved it! But I wasn’t allowed to eat any as a foal and I was forced to stay on my mother’s milk for months, which was a real bummer as I love sugar! Anyway…”

This was going to be a long plane journey…

Chapter Twelve: Ponies on a Plane

Chapter Twelve - Ponies on a Plane!

“And then we were showered in chocolate milk and everypony else was angry at Discord but I loved it! Then Princess Celestia said we needed to stop him, which I didn’t really want to do because I wanted more chocolate milk, but as the Princess said so I had to agree. So then we went through this huge maze and Discord appeared and stole everyone’s wings and horns, which was mean, but he was so funny! He’s a comical genius I tell you! So then we entered the maze and got separated, then I found a load of laughing balloons and Discord came along, and he said some mean things to me which made turn into a big moody meany pants, like Twilight!” Pinkie droned on, giggling as she gave her little jeer at Twilight.

It had been two long hours, Pinkie had told me her life story from birth to the return of Discord, and no doubt she would continue to present day. The others were bored out of their wits, Applejack and Rainbow Dash had even drifted off to sleep.

“I wish I hadn’t come up with this stupid idea…” Rarity sighed.

“So after walking around with the others and getting mad at Fluttershy for laughing at me non-stop, I got super moody and went home to throw cupcakes at a wall. Then an hour or two later, Twilight came along and made me happy again! Then we went to get Rainbow Dash, who was really difficult to catch because she was flying, we tried to catch her with a rope but I accidentally tied the other end to my leg and Rarity’s leg and we were pulled out of the balloon!” Pinkie continued.

A good half hour later Pinkie finally came to the part I was interested in.

“So, just a week after reforming Mr D, Princess Celestia sends us a letter saying there’s some great big emergency and that we need to come to Canterlot for a super important mission briefing; then she told us about your world and that we exist there as a cartoon, which was so cool! I couldn’t believe I was famous! She told us she had been to this place before when a different event happened, so she went there to deal with it, she said that she stayed there for a while and used her magic to find humans who were 'worthy' or something like that. Apparently you were one of them, so when the orb thingy came here, you got picked for the job!” She explained.

As I listened to her explanation I was able to make more sense of why the six had come to me, it was pure luck of the draw. I could finally put that mystery to bed. Although I was now curious about how Celestia found me, and found how I was 'worthy' for that matter. But there was no point thinking about questions that couldn’t be answered.

“How are you still listening to this…?” Rainbow Dash said sleepily as she woke up.

“It’s interesting.” I replied with a big cheesy grin.

“You’re weird dude…” Dash yawned.

“So, after a few hours of being taught about this place, she took Twilight into her chambers and gave her a personal pep talk, then she used a big shiny spell and bam! We came here; then we watched you for two weeks until we were sure you were the right guy!” Pinkie continued once more.

“What exactly did you see me do while you were watching me?” I asked.

“Nothing much, just you playing on your laptop thingy; oh and we saw you boxing on both of the Wednesdays. Now that was cool to watch! Blam! Slam! Kablamo! Ding ding!” Pinkie squeaked.

I raised my eyebrows in surprise at Pinkie’s enthusiasm towards my boxing, but then again she was enthusiastic about everything and anything.

“Why’d you ask that anyway?” Rainbow Dash questioned.

“No reason, just wondering.” I answered.

“Ooh, has someone been a naughty boy and doesn’t want us seeing what he’s been up to?” Dashie teased, putting emphasis on the 'naughty'.

"I don't really know what you mean by that, but the answer is 'no'" I said with a frown.

"Oh come on, you know what I mean..." Dash pressed on.

“Ok, I’ll admit it, I’m guilty..." I paused.

Rainbow Dash tilted her head on one side and raised her eyebrows.

"I ripped a tag off a mattress.” I finished.

My random response left Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie in fits of laughter I also heard a tiny giggle from Fluttershy who was behind me.

“A mattress! The heck’s with that?” Rainbow Dash spluttered.

I shrugged and asked Pinkie to proceed with her story.

“Well, then your doggy found us and started barking at us and Twilight zapped her! Which was mean, the poor thing ran away yelping. Anyway, that night we were talking about it, and then we met you! That’s it, the end! Sixteen years of my life been and gone!” She concluded.

I was suddenly slapped in the face with the element of surprise and confusion; the was only sixteen? That couldn’t be right, surely, I must have heard wrong.

“Um, how many years did you say?” I asked.

“Sixteeny weeny! I’m seventeen in August!” She chirped.

I sat there and processed this information for a moment, Pinkie was only sixteen. That was when a new question arose to my mind, how old were these ponies? If they were all in their teens like Pinkie, the Equestria Girls movie would make a lot more sense as they were all at high school, but I was still very surprised. Pinkie and I were the same age! Although my birthday was in January and her's was much further ahead. A month from now would be Pinkie's birthday; if we weren't being chased by some angry malitia in Brazil at the time, I'd bake her a cake to celebrate.

"Dude, you alright?" Rainbow Dash asked.

I suddenly realised that I'd been staring at Pinkie for a good ten seconds and blinked a few times before looking at Dash.

"Yeah I'm fine, I just didn't expect Pinkie to be so young." I replied.

"Well how old did you think she was? Like, twenty?" She quizzed.

"Well, yeah actually..." I mumbled in response.

"What made you think that?" Rarity asked, joining in on the new conversation.

"I dont really know, I guess it's because you're all so independent and that you all live in your own houses. Applejack and her brother run a farm that supplies the whole of Ponyville, and Rarity, you even run your own business with the Carousel Boutique; I don't know about Equestria very much, but in this world, running your own business is quite grown up. So I expected you all to be inbetween your twenties and thirties." I told them.

"Ah, I understand now..." Rarity hummed.

"When do you humans get jobs and stuff then?" Dash asked.

"It depends on the job." I replied, "From the age of thirteen you can deliver newspapers. When you're sixteen you can work in retail and a few other jobs but only at minimum wage. Other jobs with full pay become available at the age of eighteen, but they require qualifications. Most people stay in education until that age though, before starting off with simple jobs." I told them.

Dash and Rarity hummed in understanding. There was also a little yawn from behind me and I looked around to see Fluttershy shuffling over to me, wiggling side to side and dragging herself along to my side, I had to restrain myself from clutching my chest and giving a 'hnng...'

"It's a lot like that in Equestria, but our education system works differently." Rarity said, bringing me back on topic.

"Oh?" I replied, gesturing for her to continue.

"Well, foals learn things very quickly, usually learning to talk inbetween ten months and one year of age. They start school from around three to five years old, and finish at around the age of fourteen to sixteen. This means a lot of ponies get the opportunity to start work early and get lots of experience. Which is opposed to just learning it all in textbooks like you humans do." Rarity explained.

In all honesty, I preferred England's education system, but if Equestria's system worked as well, then I couldn't really complain with it.

"Interesting..." I mumbled, thinking about a million different things at once.

"So, I assume you want to know how old we are?" Rarity guessed.

I smiled and nodded frantically, it was as if Rarity had been able to read my exact thoughts.
Rarity cleared her throat before she began.

"Well for starters, you are quite correct when you say running a business is grown up, as Applejack and I are the oldest in this little company, Applejack is twenty four, I am twenty seven, Rainbow Dash is twenty on the dot." Rarity began to tell me.

Before she could continue, Fluttershy sneezed next to me, and being Fluttershy, it was cute as heck.

"Aww..." I said fondly.

Fluttershy then sneezed a second time, even cuter than the last, I could resist it no longer.

"Hnng..." I quietly groaned as I clutched my chest.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Rarity asked worriedly.

"Flu... Fluttershy..." I gasped.

"What about me?" Fluttershy squeaked, now extremely worried.

"Too... Cute..." I moaned before flopping onto my side and pretended to die.

Fluttershy blushed and looked away, Rarity and Rainbow Dash burst into laughter, while Pinkie genuinely thought I was dead. She pounced on me and started punching me in the chest.

"Callum! Don't go into the light! Don't go into the light!" She wailed.

This caused me to have a coughing fit as I wasn't prepared for the sudden attack. Which only made Rarity and Dash laugh even harder. Even Fluttershy began to giggle.

"I'm ok Pinkie! I'm ok!" I wheezed.

"I saved you!" She squealed, "Guys did you see that? I saved him!"

"You sure did." Rainbow Dash cheered sarcastically.

"May I continue now?" Rarity asked, still chuckling at the scene.

"By all means." I replied while Pinkie hugged me around the belly, still believing that she had actually saved my life.

"Where was I? Ah yes, Rainbow Dash is twenty, Twilight turned eighteen two and a half weeks ago, Fluttershy is seventeen, and Pinkie is the youngest at sixteen." Rarity finished.

They were all a bit younger than I had expected, but now that Rarity had told me of their ages, I wasn't all that surprised, one thing now on my mind was Princess Celestia's decision to send them here. Who in their right mind would send a sixteen year old on a highly important mission, to one of the most hostile places known to ponykind? Perhaps Celestia had valid reasons, but until I heard them, she was as mad as a marsh hare.

"You seem to be in very deep thought, do our ages surprise you?" Rarity asked.

“A little, but I also have other things on my mind.” I admitted.

“Like what?” Rarity asked.

“It’s nothing important.” I lied, not wanting to bring attention to the matter.

“Very well.” Rarity smiled.

“I don’t know about you, but I’m going to get some sleep.” I said.

“But it’s the middle of the day.” Dash replied.

“Coming from the one who’s already had a nap.” Rarity teased.

“That was different, Pinkie’s boring life story sent me to sleep.” Rainbow moaned.

At this, Pinkie gasped, and then her lower lip began to tremble.

“You… You find my life, boring…?” She asked, her pupils expanding.

“No, I didn’t mean it like that Pinkie.” Rainbow Dash tried to say.

“You think I’m boring!” Pinkie wailed and buried her head into the nearest suitcase.

Rainbow Dash face hoofed and went over to apologise and comfort Pinkie. Rarity then came over to sit next to me to avoid being soaked in Pinkie’s tears.

“She’s pretty quick to react isn’t she?” I asked.

“And easy to please, watch.” Rarity giggled and she used her magic to create the sound of a squeaky toy.

Pinkie jumped into the air and started searching all around the aircraft in search of a toy; she stuck her head out of the large pressure bubble and instantly yelped and jumped back, the bubble responded by creating a watery noise and wobbling a little.

“My ears! My ears!” Pinkie screamed, falling onto her side.

At that, Rainbow Dash whizzed to her side and knelt down beside her.

“Pinkie are you alright?” She asked, full of worry, looking all over Pinkie for sign of injury.

Pinkie then burst into laughter and started rolling around.

“Tingly!” She squeaked, before crawling around the cargo hold like a cat.

I simply raised my eyebrows. I wasn’t quite sure about what to focus on in that small event.

“Quite the excitable one, eh?” Rarity chuckled.

“Yes, quite.” I mumbled.

With that, I stretched, and tried to find a comfy spot to sleep in, which I could not do, thanks to a large pipe underneath me. I ended up moving over to a pile of suitcases and curled up; it was then when an unfriendly voice spoke.

“Get away from me.” Twilight grumbled.

“I’m comfy here thanks.” I replied, yawning.

“Don’t make me say it again.” Twilight repeated, her tone increasing.

“I’m tired, can we make a five hour truce and you can kill me later?” I moaned.

“I said, get away fr-”

“Shut up Sparkle.” I interrupted, then shut my eyes and smiled to myself.

“What did you just call me?” Twilight asked, now standing up and towering over me.

I kept my eyes shut and yawned.

“Sparkle Sparkle Sparkle…” I mumbled, pretending to be asleep and mumbling.

Twilight growled in frustration and stormed off to the other side of the bubble; I shrugged and lay there, trying to get to sleep.

It had been half an hour and I still hadn’t been able to sleep with all the noise, I wasn’t sure what was louder, the plane’s engines, or Pinkie’s mile-a-minute talk.

“And then I said, ‘Newsflash, it’s the wrong soup!’” Pinkie giggled as she finished another one of her jokes.

Rainbow Dash laughed, as she enjoyed Pinkie’s humour, but everyone else just sighed and looked for something else to do.

“Hey Rare, I got an idea…” I heard Applejack whisper to Rarity.

“Oh?” She replied.

“How about you sneak up to Callum over there, and use that dye spell of yours to change the colour of his hair…” She chuckled.

My eyes shot wide open, but I didn’t move, I wanted to hear Rarity’s reaction before I confronted them. Luckily my back was facing them, so they wouldn’t see if I were awake or not.

“Goodness no, I wouldn’t ever do such a thing!” She gasped.

I sighed a breath of relief.

“Why not? It’d be funny as heck.” Applejack asked, still chuckling at the idea.

“For starters, it is cruel, and secondly, we barely know him.” Rarity told her.

I raised an eyebrow, this was starting to get interesting.

“He seems friendly enough.” Applejack said.

“He seems the friendly type, but we should still tread lightly here Applejack, this isn’t Equestria; this place is dangerous, Callum said it himself.” Rarity reminded.

“If he warned us himself, doesn’t it show that he doesn’t want to hurt us?” Applejack asked rhetorically.

“I never said he had bad intentions, but we shouldn’t be so quick to warm up to him, we haven’t known him for more than three days yet, you should never judge a book by its cover.” Rarity said.

“Actually, I know where you’re coming from Rare, I mean, he did hit Twilight and all…” Applejack mentioned.

“That was a necessary move though, I’m not saying he’s a bad guy, I am just saying we shouldn’t play pranks on him as if he’s a friend that we’ve known for years.” Rarity advised.

It was about time one of these ponies showed some common sense. Twilight was overdoing it, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy and Pinkie weren’t thinking about it at all, but Rarity had it just right. In this world, you simply could not trust people you didn’t know. I had a lot of respect for Rarity now; she was definitely the most mature out of the group, without a doubt.

“And as for hitting Twilight, I’m sure it wasn’t at his full strength, he just needed her to listen to him there and then, or she wouldn’t have made it onto this aeroplane.” Rarity said.

“Still, he shouldn’t have used violence as his resort.” Applejack replied.

“Well look at his background, the boy had a violent life; his mother beat him, his brother beat him, he beats people as well for a sport, that boxing, or whatever it was called.” Rarity pointed out.

“I guess you have a point there.” AJ mumbled.

“What are you talking about?” Rainbow Dash asked, butting into the conversation.

“Just sports.” Rarity lied.

Rainbow Dash knew her friends too well and simply turned to Applejack.

“Applejack what are you two talking about?” Rainbow Dash asked a second time.

“Oh, well, we were just talking about Callum’s background, and how we shouldn’t get too friendly with him just yet.” Applejack explained.
Rarity sighed, and then I heard Rainbow giggle.

“Rare, if you want to hide a conversation, don’t have it with AJ.” She said, still giggling.

With that, Applejack took a stretch and went to talk to Fluttershy, who was quietly watching life go by.

“So why were you on about Callum as if we shouldn’t trust him?” Dash asked.

“I’m not saying that, I’m just saying we’ve only known him for two days and shouldn’t play pranks on him.” Rarity repeated.

“Suit yourself, but I think he’s cool.” Rainbow said blankly.

“Thinking is not the same as knowing, we should get to know him before we get too friendly with him.” Rarity said, who was now pretty much repeating every word she had said to Applejack.

“I don’t think, I know; did you not see him boxing? When he brought that guy to the floor? It was so awesome! One punch to the face, then he squatted and slammed him in the gut! I haven’t seen a fight like that since Soarin beat up that new guy in the Wonderbolt Academy!” Dash chuckled.

“There was a fight in the Wonderbolt Academy?” Rarity asked in shock.

“Oh yeah, and it was nasty, and very one sided. This ass of a pony tried to hit on Soarin’s sister, and she rejected him, so the guy tried to force her to get with him; she went and told Soarin, and he beat him up in the lunch hall in front of everyone!” Dash told her.

“Didn’t he get in trouble?” Rarity questioned.

“He did at first, Spitfire came in and asked what the heck was going on, then Soarin told her the whole story, and do you want to know how Spitfire reacted?” Dash asked.

Rarity simply nodded.

“She went up to the other guy and bucked him right in the jaw! She knocked the guy out!” Dashie said, practically shouting at this point.

“Isn’t that rather unprofessional?” Rarity asked.

“Not at all, in the Wonderbolts everypony takes care of one another, it's a band of brothers and sisters. If someone messes with one of the members, the whole crew come along to beat the crap out of them!” Dash roared with laughter.

“Besides your foul language, that is a very interesting insight to the Wonderbolts.” Rarity said.

“Foul language? I only said ‘crap’, it’s not like I said ‘fu-”

“I don’t need an example Rainbow Dash!” Rarity quickly interrupted Dashie before she could finish.

“Alright, alright, no need to lose your rag now.” Dash teased.

“Whatever.” Rarity moaned and went over to sit on a more comfortable suitcase near me.

I pretended to wake up, although I already was, and sat up.

“What to do…” I mumbled.

“Oh, you’re awake.” Rarity said. “Sorry if I woke you.”

“Don’t worry about it, I’m quite a light sleeper.” I replied.

Although I was awake the whole time, I wasn’t lying at that point; I was indeed a light sleeper. As long as I was well rested, it would take no more than a small twig snapping to wake me up.

“Are all humans like that, or just some of you?” Rarity asked.

“Just some,” I confirmed, “some of us can be awfully lazy.”

“I see…” Rarity hummed to herself.

Without warning, Pinkie Pie jumped onto a suitcase and screamed.

“We hit turbulence!”

Suddenly the whole aircraft started shaking, suitcase piles fell down, Pinkie jumped and ended up reaching the top of the cargo hold and grabbed onto a metal bar. A suitcase fell down and hit Rainbow Dash in the face causing her to yelp and jump back into me, who in turn jumped back as well, I tripped over a case and fell out of the pressure bubble, my ears instantly started ringing and my lungs felt as if they were about to burst; I breathed out quickly to reduce the pressure and jumped back into the bubble. My ears continued to ring, but at least my lungs went back to normal; Rarity hurried over to check on me.

“Good heavens! Are you ok?” She asked.

“Never better…” I mumbled as I shook my head to stop my ears ringing.

I looked over to Rainbow Dash to find she was having a nosebleed, thanks to the suitcase hitting her right in the nose. By the looks of things the bleeding was quite severe, but before I could suggest anything Fluttershy had darted to her side and was telling her to tilt her head forward and breathe through her mouth.

“Don’t put your head back now, and use your hoof to cover your nostrils, only gently though.” Fluttershy soothed.

I raised my eyebrows and sat there in astonishment, I had expected Fluttershy to hide at the sight of blood, yet she was the calmest pony here with it. So it seemed that her time working as a nurse in the Ponyville hospital had really paid off.

“I swear you should put your head back, not forward Fluttershy.” Applejack said.

“No, as nosebleeds start at the top of the inner nose, closer to the nostrils. If you tilt your head back, it bleeds for longer, and you can risk choking on it as it goes down your throat.” Fluttershy explained.

At that, Rarity gagged and ran to the other side of the pressure bubble, causing Rainbow Dash to giggle, making her splutter, which resulted in some blood spraying on my legs; Fluttershy gasped and ran to her bag to grab tissues.
While all this was going on, Pinkie was still dangling from the top of the cargo bay, somehow managing to hold on with just her two front hooves.

“Little help?” She squeaked.

Applejack stood beneath her and sighed.

“Drop.” She ordered as she rolled her eyes.

Pinkie dropped and let out a long “Weeeeeee” as she fell. Applejack reared up and caught Pinkie with her forelegs. After putting her down, Pinkie whizzed around like an excited puppy. I shrugged and looked back to Fluttershy, who was coming over to me; she took the tissue from her mouth and placed it around her hoof, before wiping the small droplets of blood from my leg.

“I’m so sorry about this.” Fluttershy exclaimed, looking as if she were about to cry.

“It’s fine, really.” I said soothingly.

“I should have got these tissues before, and now blood’s on your legs, I’m so sorry.” Fluttershy continued to apologise, as if she hadn’t heard me at all.

“It’s not like it’s the first time I’ve had blood on me, I’ve had a lot of cuts in my time.” I reassured her.

“But it’s not your blood, it’s somepony else’s.” Flutters squeaked.

“So? It’s only blood, at least it’s not sick or something.” I replied.

Upon realising that I honestly didn’t give a shit, Fluttershy relaxed a little, finished wiping off the blood, and went back to tending to Rainbow Dash, whose nose bleed had begun to die down.
I looked across the cargo hold to find Twilight glaring at me; I responded by sticking my tongue out at her, she snorted in disgust and muttered something under her breath at me that was too quiet for me to hear.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite hear you, you’ll have to repeat that!” I called over to her.

Everypony stopped and looked at me, and then to Twilight, who looked away.

“What?” Rainbow Dash said with her head on one side.

“Well, it seemed Twilight wanted to say something, but it was a bit too quiet for me to hear.” I replied.

I stood up and headed over to Twilight, I stopped when I was about two metres away from her.

“Could you repeat it please?” I asked.

Her lips trembled slightly, clearly not wanting to.

“Never mind…” She said quietly.

“No no, please do, it sounded really important.” I pressed, beckoning the others to come closer.

Twilight looked at the faces of all her friends, and then back to me.

“I was talking to myself.” She lied.

“Really? Then why were you looking at me when you said it?” I continued.

I had a very good idea of what she said, I may not be the world’s best lip reader, but I can always spot when people mouth the words ‘fuck you’ at me.

“I was just saying random things to myself, and I happened to look at you when I said it.” Twilight mumbled, I was clearly getting under her skin now.

“Well what were you saying?” I asked slowly.

I gave her a small, devious smile that the others didn’t see, showing her that I clearly knew what she said, and was simply trying to get her to say it aloud to her friends.

“I… I was wondering what Daring Do would do if she were on this plane with us.” Twilight replied.

Rainbow Dash giggled and walked off, losing interest, the others did the same; Twilight had played her cards well, I’d give her that. I took a step closer and squatted down to be on her level.

“I know what you said.” I growled quietly.

She said nothing and glared at me like a rabid dog, not taking her eyes off mine.

“I don’t know what’s happened to you, but you aren’t the Twilight Sparkle I knew about, nor are you the Twilight Sparkle your friends knew. So until I see the nice, curious, friendly Twilight that I knew from the TV show, you are no friend of mine.” I hissed.

“Even if your kind were only half as foul as they are, even if I were safe back at home, I’d still never be friends with filth like you…” She retorted.

My expression didn’t change, I simply stared at her.

“So be it…” I replied before standing up and joining the happy side of the cargo hold.

“What was that all about?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Oh nothing, I just thought Twilight was trying to tell me something important.” I replied.

Applejack gave me a dull look, and then raised an eyebrow; I ignored the gesture and sat down, and then began talking to Pinkie Pie.

“So Pinkie, how did you know we were about to go through some turbulence just now?” I asked.

“Just a hunch.” She giggled.

I rolled my eyes and decided not to question Pinkie Logic. I looked around to notice Rainbow Dash staring at my fingers intently. Her nosebleed had stopped now, upon noticing I was looking at her, she looked up and giggled.

“What?” I said curiously.

“Nothing, I just think your fingers are really cool.” She chuckled.

This caused me to chuckle as well, even though I had no idea why.

“Why?” I asked as I tilted my head slightly.

“I don’t know, there’s just something about them that I find funny and cool at the same time.” Dash replied.

I looked at my hands and wiggled my fingers about, and found nothing amusing about them.

“I guess it’s because you don’t have any, so you find them more intriguing.” I suggested with a shrug.

“More intri-what?” Dash questioned with her head on one side.

“It’s another word for interesting.” I explained.

“Why not just say ‘interesting’ then?” She pointed out.

“Because intriguing sounds fancier.” I replied.

“Egghead.” Rainbow giggled.

“So?” I replied, not bothered by being slightly nerdy.

“You’re an egghead.” She repeated.

“I don’t see the problem.” I said calmly.

“You’re an egghead, that’s the problem.” Dashie giggled.

“Excuse me, do I look bovvered?” I said in my Catherine Tate impression.

“What?”

“Bovvered? Do I look… Bovvered?” I repeated.

“A bit.” Dash giggled.

“Am I bovvered? Bovvered?” I continued to say, making my hand go up and in an arc as I said ‘bothered’.

“Yes, you do look bo-”

“Am I bovvered?” I said slowly, interrupting her.

At this, Dashie began to laugh, my sudden Catherine Tate impression took her completely off guard, and she had no idea how to react to it.

“Callum stop that’s so weir-”

“Hand! Face! Bovvered!?” I interrupted her, wiggling my head side to side like a dancing owl.

“What the heck Cal-”

“Bovvered?”

“Dude s-”

“Bovvered Dash? Am I bovvered?”

“Callum s-”

“Am I bovvered love?”

“What did you just-”

“I aint bovvered, do I look bovvered? Am I bovvered?”

“Callum seriously!” Dash tried to call out.

“LOOK AT ME!” I yelled, then pointed to myself, “Does this face! Look bovvered? To you?”

“Shut up!” Rainbow Dash howled with laughter.

“Why? I ain’t bovvered love; do I look bovvered to you?” I asked for the millionth time.

“You sound so weird!” She wailed.

By now, every pony was listening and laughing to my wondrous impression that was Catherine Tate. I decided to play Catherine’s trump card, talking a mile a minute that would give Pinkie a run for her money…

“Well love I was only arksing if I looked bovvered to you 'coz you were calling me egghead like I was bovvered but I ain't bovvered then I arksed you if I looked bovvered but you didn't answer me, it was a simple question love, do I look bovvered? I was arksing you a question, can't I arks you a question? Do I look bovvered? Hand! Face! Plane! Pony! Magic! Titan! Orb! Big Ball! Cuppa tea! Cuppa tea! Hand! Fingers! I ain't… BOVVERED!” I said, executing my impression flawlessly.

As I finished Rainbow Dash collapsed onto the ground in tears of laughter, Rarity and Applejack also howled with laughter, Pinkie didn’t get it, and Fluttershy thought I was genuinely angry, but then began to giggle as she understood I was only playing.

About a minute later when the laughter died down, a wheezing Rainbow Dash was finally able to sit up.

“Dude… What… What the heck was that about!?” She exclaimed, still gasping for air.

“’T’was an impression of a famous comedian.” I explained, making a duck face.

“What’s he called?” Rarity chuckled.

“She, is called Catherine Tate, I’ll show you a video of her if we ever get the chance.” I told her.

“If that’s what she’s like, then I can’t wait!” Dash giggled, finally able to calm herself.

Things got boring after that, I was out of jokes and impressions for now, and the others all went to chat with one another about home, so I wasn’t to be involved. I opened my rucksack, took out my phone and earphones, plugged in, and selected a song to play. I had a large amount of songs, due to my big vary in music, I had heavy metal, dubstep, pop, and classical, there was no genre I didn’t like.

After a minute or so of making a little playlist, I hit play, and zoned out to the song that suited the recent events of the past three days.

“Dream catch me, yeah… Dream catch me when I fall… Or else I won’t come back at all…”

Author's Note

For those of you who don't know Catherine Tate, here are 2 clips of her.
(Yes, she was Donna in Doctor Who, which is why David Tennant is in the first video)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WxB1gB6K-2A
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zV1zK8zRCPo

Chapter Thirteen: For Flying Out Loud

Chapter Thirteen - Are We There Yet?

After a few relaxing hours of music and daydreaming, I turned off my phone and sat up to find Applejack and Rainbow Dash asleep again, Twilight had also drifted off to sleep as well. Rarity was calmly watching the spinning light at one side of the cargo hold; looking across from that I noticed Pinkie was also staring at the light, just not as calmly, her head was rotating around and around to follow where the light went. I looked around to see Fluttershy writing into a little book, I shuffled over to her with curiosity.

“What’s that you got there?” I asked.

She yelped and threw the book in the air. Twilight heard the scream and woke up, jumped to her hooves and aimed her now glowing horn at me, growling like a rabid wolf.

“Caught you! Murderer!” She yelled.

Applejack and Dash woke up at this point and looked around frantically in a state of confusion. Twilight ran up to me and glared, her teeth bared into a violent snarl.

“You sick twisted creature! Trying to kill Fluttershy!” She screeched.

“He tried WHAT!?” Applejack and Rainbow Dash yelped at once.

Applejack glared at me, and gave me a look as if she were about to kill me.

“I did not try anything like that! What the hell is wrong with you Twilight? Why would you even think to accuse me of such a thing!?” I shouted at Twilight.

“Liar! You attacked her and she screamed! You crept up on her in attempt to shut her mouth before you kill her!” Twilight yelled.

Applejack and Dash looked from me to Twilight unsure of who to trust. I glared back to Twilight, I was now livid with her. I was curious about Fluttershy’s book, and here she was accusing me of trying to kill her!
From the base of a pile of suitcases came somepony clearing her throat. We all looked around to find Rarity standing up.

“I’ll have you all know that I witnessed the entire situation.” She said calmly.

Everyone looked to face her, and I sighed a breath of relief that Rarity had seen.

“Twilight dear, I know you do not trust Callum, but there is really no need to overreact, he was merely curious about Fluttershy’s diary, and came over to have a look, there was no ill intent. He simply caught Fluttershy unaware and made her jump.” She explained with a warm smile.
Twilight whipped around to face her, with a face of bewilderment.

“How blind are you!? He was clearly trying to attack her!” She yelled.

My face, too, became contorted with bewilderment, I then decided to speak my mind.

“You know what Twilight…? You sound, insane… You need to be medicated.” I spoke.

“Fuck you Callum!” She spat back.

The cargo hold went quiet, I looked around to see the others’ faces to find each and every one of them were horrified, besides Pinkie, who tilted her head on one side. The ponies looked from me to her repeatedly, Rarity and Applejack also looked to Pinkie with a look of fear, hoping their innocent friend wouldn’t become tainted with Twilight’s sudden swearing. Everypony then looked to me, to see how I was going to react to Twilight, waiting for me to lash back at her.

“Well… At least you had the common courtesy to say my name.” I replied, dipping my head in respect.

Twilight let out a loud growl and stormed off to the other side of the bubble again, and out of the corner of my eye I noticed Rainbow Dash grinning at my comment.

“I’ll go try to calm her down, I think there’s been a very big misunderstanding here…” Applejack sighed.

“You think? AJ, Rarity saw the whole thing, whatever the problem is, it’s with Twilight, so while you’re calming her down, do your best to find out what’s making her be like this.” Rainbow responded.

The ponies dispersed, Applejack went to Twilight, Rainbow Dash went to find a comfy seat, Fluttershy went to pick up her diary, and thankfully Pinkie had shrugged off the swear word and wandered around aimlessly.

Without warning I felt a hoof prodding my arm. I turned around to find Rarity looking up at me.

“Thank you…” She said quietly, nodding slightly as she said it.

“What for?” I asked.

“For not rising to Twilight’s antics and helping to diffuse the situation, I wish to spare Pinkie and Fluttershy from this sort of conflict, we’re all stressed and those two are very fragile. I want to keep them as happy and as calm as possible.” She answered, dipping her head with respect.

“Anytime.” I replied with a shrug.

I didn’t really think what I said was in need of thanks, I naturally liked to calm situations like that, but I guess Rarity did have a very valid point.

“And I must say, you really do know how to put a smile on one’s face when needed, you could have diffused that in so many different ways, and you went and made a joke to do so, and your Catherine Tate thing you did earlier… You really are quite the comedian.” She giggled.

I chuckled in return, rather flattered at her statement.

“What are you two lovebirds talking about?” Rainbow Dash said as she squeezed in between us, causing us both to jump a little.

“I beg your-”

“I’m kidding Rare, stop getting so blushy over it.” Rainbow teased, cutting Rarity off.

“I think the word you’re looking for is ‘flustered’.” I informed Dash.

“Egghead.” She jibed.

“Bovvered?” I said back dryly in Catherine Tate's voice.

“Don’t you dare…” Dashie growled playfully.

“Don’t tempt me then.” I retorted, flexing my eyebrows at her.

Rarity chuckled slightly at the scene, before giving off a yawn.

“Tired?” I asked.

“A little, I didn’t sleep very well with Rainbow Dash snoring back in the tents last night.” She explained.

“Hey! I don’t snore!” Rainbow said defensively.

“Please, if you don’t snore, then pigs have wings.” Rarity giggled.

“They did when Discord broke free and took over the place.” Dash retorted.

“Touché…” Rarity hummed, “Either way, you snore, very loudly.”

“Shut up!” Rainbow Dash whined.

I joined in on the banter by lying on my back and making a really loud snoring noise, which caused Pinkie Pie to jump into the air and shout “No! It can’t end like this!” and then she went back to reading all the labels on each suitcase.

After a good ten seconds of staring at Pinkie with the utmost confusion, we looked back to one another.

“Is she…?” I said slowly.

“She’s fine.” Dash replied, rolling her eyes, and walked over to her.

Rarity yawned a second time, which caused the effect that I like to call the Mexican Yawn. Where someone yawns and if someone notices, for some unknown reason, they yawn as well; I opened my mouth wide and yawned, which created a high pitched whine sound, Rarity looked at me in confusion.

“What?” I asked.

“Your yawn, it’s very… Well… Dog like.” She chuckled.

“Oh get lost… If I had a pound for every time I’ve been told I sound like a dog when I yawn…” I sighed.

“A pound?” Rarity repeated with curiosity.

“It’s England’s form of currency, it’s like a bit, basically.” I explained.

“Aaahh…” She replied with understanding.

“Right, I’m going to have a brief chat with Fluttershy, and then I’m going to try to get some sleep.” I said, standing up.

“Very well.” Rarity said with a smile.

I turned around and headed to Fluttershy, who was trying to stuff her diary into a small pocket in her bag, and was struggling.

“Hey.” I said quietly.

She flinched and turned around.

“Oh, um, hi.” She said.

“Look, I just want to say sorry for making you jump earlier, I didn’t mean it.” I apologised.

“No, I’m sorry, it wasn’t your fault, I was just unaware.” Fluttershy replied.

“You don’t have to be, I know that you dislike being crept up on. I’m the one who’s sorry.” I said.

“No, really, I’m really timid and I don’t mean to be, I’m sorry.” Fluttershy murmured.

“Honestly Fluttershy, you don’t need to be sorry, it was my bad.” I told her.

“Sorry.” She squeaked.

“Don’t be.” I repeated.

“Ok…” She whispered, then paused for a few seconds, before looking at me.

“Sorry.”

I facepalmed; as I did so, I saw the corners of Fluttershy’s lips raise up into a tiny little grin, and it was by far the cutest thing I had seen out of these six so far; I decided to hold in another ‘hnng’ in case Pinkie tried to break my ribs again. I smirked back and we had a little giggle together.

“Would you like me to help you with that?” I asked, pointing to her diary, which she still couldn’t quite fit in the tight pocket of her saddlebag.

“Um, um…”

“I won’t look, I promise, you just look like you’re having some trouble with it.” I said with a warm smile.

My smile got to her, and she smiled back and happily nodded.

“Um, ok. Thank you.”

She took the diary in one hoof and tried to give it to me, as she did so it fell out of her hoof and the pages flipped open. She squeaked in fear and dived over the diary to hide its contents; as she did this, a small slip of paper flew up and flew around.

“No!” Fluttershy squealed and dived at the slip, and missed.

It spun around and around before it hit the ground, revealing itself as a photo, of a blue pony.
Fluttershy pounced on it before I could take a good look, and stuffed it back in her diary, tears welling up in her eyes.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” I asked.

“Nothing, that picture just means a lot to me.” She whispered.

{So, Rainbow Dash was telling the truth about this, ‘Midnight’ pony…} I thought to myself.

“I understand.” I replied, before taking the diary and inserting it into the pocket of her saddlebag for her.

“Thank you.” She smiled, dipping her head gracefully.

“Don’t mention it.” I chuckled.

“Like when I thanked you last night?” She giggled back.

“No.” I said dully, shuddering at the memory of helping someone a year older than me go to the toilet in the middle of the night.

The both of us giggled again, before I sat next to her and sighed.

“Is something wrong?” Flutters asked nervously.

“No. Well, I don’t think so anyway.” I replied.

“What do you mean?” She quizzed with a head on one side.

I sat there and thought about it, I wasn’t so sure myself. I was happy that the six were real, and that I was travelling with them, and I was doing something extremely important which gave my life a severe purpose. But like all positives, they came with a few servings of negatives on the side.
I was giving up a normal life, I had given up all forms of electronic leisure, no TV, no video games, all of it, gone. All my friends on Skype, gone.
A lot of my life would be on the move, getting from location to location in search of these orb shards. I’ve given up Chilli, who meant a lot to me. I’ve also given up something I really wanted, which was a girlfriend. This way of life with the six would mean that I’d meet nobody else, let alone stay with them even if I did meet them. I wasn't thinking about getting with any of the ponies either, clopping wasn’t really my thing, I’d sooner be seen dead than have a real life pony waifu.

“Callum?” Fluttershy said, poking my wrist gently.

I shook my head to clear the thought clouds a little.

“Sorry, I was just thinking.” I replied.

“Are you sure you’re ok?” She asked quietly.

“Yeah, I’m just thinking about the stuff I’ve left behind, that’s all.” I answered.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up anything personal…” She whispered, looking at the floor.

“Honestly Fluttershy, it’s fine, I was only thinking about a few things.” I said, rubbing my wrist where she had poked me.

“Okay.” She replied quietly.

I turned my head, to find I was being glared at by the purple menace. I rolled my eyes and looked back to Fluttershy.

“So what’s the deal with the purple one? Why’s she acting up like this? Surely there is some reason behind it which you guys know about.” I questioned.

“Um, well, I don’t really know…” She whispered. “She’s been like it since we came here; she scares me a little bit…”

“You’re telling me that none of you know what’s gotten into her?” I asked.

“Well, Applejack was the last one to be teleported here, along with Twilight, so you would have a better chance asking her, but I don’t think she likes you as well as me, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie, or Rarity. I think you should wait a while and bond with her more before you try that.” She suggested.

I simply nodded in understanding, as I made a mental note that I needed to do a lot of ass kissing when it came to Applejack, she seemed to be very close to Twilight, so the slap I gave her earlier probably went down a lot worse than I thought.

“Thank you.” I said fondly, looking her in the eyes.

“What for?” She asked.

“For trusting me, I expected you all to be as mistrustful as Twilight when I first met you guys.” I replied.

“Why would you think that?” She quizzed.

“Well this is a new world, and it isn't a perfect one at that. Twilight is right in some sense, my race is not the best. I thought it would take a while for you all to get used to hanging out with me.” I explained.

“Oh, I understand, but remember where we come from. We try to make friends as quickly as possible, as long as you give us no reason to be afraid of you, why should we doubt you? You just threw away your whole life to help us, if that’s not a reason to trust you, I don’t know what is.” Fluttershy said in return.

This caused me to take a moment of thought, she was right, and it really made me feel quite good about myself, to know that Fluttershy had warmed up to me so quickly.

“That’s really nice Fluttershy, thank you.” I smiled.

“You’re welcome…” She giggled, blushing, and rather confused at my sudden gratitude.

I turned around to find Twilight was still glaring at me. In response I pulled a duck face, causing her snort and look away.

“So Callum, I was wondering… Could I ask you some questions?” Fluttershy asked.

I turned to face her again, she was looking at the ground and prodding the floor with a hoof.

“Um, sure; what sort of questions?” I quizzed.

“Well, just more general ones, your world, your race, that sort of thing.” She answered.

“By all means.” I replied happily.

I had it figured that if I bonded really well with somepony as timid as Fluttershy, perhaps Applejack and Twilight would trust me more. Along with the fact that I really liked Fluttershy in general, she appeared to be really smart and thoughtful under all the shyness.

“So what did you want to ask me?” I said.

“Well… I was just a bit curious about a few things…” She replied.

“Such as?”

“Um, well, I was wondering about things like your wildlife and a few other things, like, why are all the animals here wild, like they are back home in the Everfree forest?” She asked.

I scratched my chin, it was a good question, and it sort of reminded me back in the day when I wondered about if animals could talk and act like humans, like the old story my dad used to tell me, of how all the pets in the home could talk on Christmas eve when everyone had gone to bed.

“Well, I’m no scientist, so I can’t quite explain that with evidence. Your world’s quite different to this one, you have dragons and magical beings and all that, so my guess is that the majority of creatures in your world are more sentient, a little more intelligence, to say it in more basic terms.” I suggested.

“That does make a lot more sense…” She hummed. “Do you have any other sentient races besides humans?”

“Nope, we are the only ones.” I answered.

“Oh…” She said.

“Although, that being said, elephants and dolphins are extremely social. Dolphins even have names for one another and work together; but I wouldn’t go as far as saying they’re sentient.” I explained.

“That’s interesting, I’d love to see dolphins and elephants. I’ve heard about them, but I’ve never travelled to places where I could meet them, it would be amazing to see them in your world.” She said with a smile.

“Me too, I’ve never been on holiday, never had the money.” I replied.

“Oh you poor thing…” Fluttershy said as she shuffled closer to me to touch my arm with her hoof.

“It’s fine, really, it doesn’t bother me.” I said reassuringly.

“If you say so, but I think everyone deserves a holiday in their childhood, to experience new places and lifestyles is a very important part of growing up.” She sighed.

“You seem to be quite the parent.” I teased.

“Well, I used to foalsit a lot.” She replied.

“Fair enough.”

After a few seconds of silence, I raised my shoulders and gave my back a little stretch.

“So, Flutters, is there anything else you want to ask me?” I questioned.

She blushed and giggled upon me calling her ‘Flutters’, and then took a little stretch of her own.

“Well, um… I was also wondering a little bit about you personally.” She said quietly.

“What do you mean by that?”

“Um, well, I mean, we watched you for two weeks and know who you are a little, and what you do in general, but is it okay if I could get to know you a little more personally?” She asked.

“Sure.” I replied with a smile, “What did you want to know?"

“Just, well, um… Everything really.” She squeaked.

“Well, what’s ‘everything’?”

“Just highlights of your life, a bit like Pinkie with her life story, just, well, not so you talk about each passing day, just the interesting ones.” She said, giggling slightly.

I chuckled at that, spending three hours of Pinkie’s life was pretty intense.

“Where to begin…” I mumbled.

“Take all the time you need.” Fluttershy beamed.

After a minute or two of thinking, I began to tell Fluttershy about my life…

I told her how I was raised in a town called Redhill, how I didn’t have any primary school, this because I was severely bullied during my first year of school, so I ended up running away, a lot; the staff and my mother had no idea of the bullying and thought I was just mentally unbalanced, so I was taken into a children’s mental home.

I told her about my dog, Inca.
Inca was a Cocker Spaniel, like Chilli, but was black, and had longer ears and fur. When I was sad, Inca would come to me and lick the tips of my fingers; it was like she knew I was unhappy, and would come to comfort me.

One day, Inca changed, for the worse, she became violent and twitchy, as if she had rabies.
It turned out that she had developed a brain tumour and it was causing the behaviour. So she was put down.
This caused me to go into a small depression, Inca was my companion; due to being at the children’s mental place I had no friends, so Inca was all I had.
Losing her seriously broke me down, and I sank into a minor depression as I began to stop eating food entirely.
Later on, I went the other way and began comfort eating constantly, until I'd put on a LOT of weight.
Upon telling her this, Fluttershy gasped in emotion and hugged me, before letting me continue with my story.

Just when life seemed to be at rock bottom, my father lost the family treasury in poker, he ended up having to pay a lot of debt when he lost the game, and he was forced to use all our holiday money and funds for things such as TV.
He was kicked out, and my brother, Oliver took over as “man of the house”.
Due to the lack of money, we had to stop paying for TV, Internet, and other luxuries. We had nothing to watch besides BBC One, BBC Two, BBC Three, and Channel Four, so at least we had The Simpsons to watch at six o’clock, which were our dinner times.
By the time it was my last year of primary school in the youth loony bin, I had shown everyone that I was clearly not mad, and was put back into a normal school for my secondary education.
Upon being moved back into a proper school, I decided that I needed to get my life back on track, so I started eating properly, and finally moved on from Inca’s untimely end.

Even though I had been given no proper education, I caught on very quickly at school, a lot of teachers said I was ‘gifted’, as I was answering maths questions faster than the teacher could write them out.
I soon went on to become one of the top pupils, but that was only academically speaking; I was no teacher’s pet, that’s for sure...
I told Fluttershy how much of a cheeky sod I was at times, causing her to giggle.
For my first two years at my secondary school, I still had no friends, as my ability to socialise had been hindered by the Youngling Asylum, as I liked to call it…

At the end of Year Eight, however, I made two friends. Harry, and Jacob; through being friends with them, I became more sociable, and made friends with everyone.

I then explained to Fluttershy how my mother decided that she didn’t like the urban life, there were too many people, she wasn’t a neighbourly person, and wanted a quiet, private place, so we moved south to the outskirts of a large town called Crawley, where we found a house with a lovely, four acre garden, just within our price range.
With the new land, we soon decided to have livestock, and took in some chickens, luckily we got them for free; I had to get up at five thirty in the mornings to tend to them, which was difficult at first, but I soon got used to it.
As for my school, still up near where I used to live, I had to get a taxi every morning, and vice versa to get home; luckily these taxis were funded by the local council.

I told Fluttershy how things started to brighten up for me from there, and then it only got so much better, when I discovered one of the most important things to me, My Little Pony, Friendship is Magic.
The show brought me to a whole new world, it taught me that not everything in the world has to be doom and gloom. Upon watching Fluttershy and the others in their world, it brought me small life morals that I could live by. I wasn’t dependant on them, but they were nice to follow nonetheless.
Upon telling Harry about being a brony, he went around telling everyone, for the sake of getting a laugh out of it; I soon became the school’s laughing stock, and lost my reputation for being a "cool kid".

For the next year of secondary school, I kept myself to myself, and cracked down on working for my GCSE exams.
I finished my long, stressful exams, with reasonable results. Seven C’s, and a D. It was nothing special, but it was enough to get me into college; personally I think I had done very well, in regards to my lack of education beforehand in the nuthouse.

The first month of the summer holiday went by in the blink of an eye, July came along, where I was confronted by none other than the six ponies I was sitting in an aeroplane cargo hold with as I spoke.

“Well, that’s it, the end; sixteen years of my life, been and gone.” I said, copying Pinkie word for word.

Fluttershy said nothing, she was clearly in deep thought.

“Fluttershy, are you o-kay!?” I yelped in surprise as she suddenly latched onto me.

“Oh Callum… I can’t believe you’ve been through so much, I’m so sorry… You poor, poor thing… Yet, you’ve stayed so strong through it all, I don’t know how you’ve done it, but you have.” She whimpered.

“Hey… It’s ok…” I said, before gently hushing her.

"B-But it's not..." She muffled into my chest.

She pulled back and I could see that she was crying. Tears were slowly slithering across her cheeks as she looked up at me, her lower lip trembling slightly, it almost caused me to cry as well. I may have still been a bit sceptical about touching the ponies still, but this moment was an exception, I leaned forward and hugged her properly.

“It’s ok Fluttershy… It’s ok…” I said gently.

“How? How did you cope?” She choked.

“Ssshh…” I hushed.

I began to pat her on the back to the rhythm of a heartbeat, gently, lovingly. Pat, pat… Pat, pat… Pat, pat…

She took a deep breath and sat back, and wiped her eyes.

“You ok?”

She simply nodded, breathing in shakily.

“I just… I just feel so bad for you… Sure some ponies have rough lives back in Equestria, but it’s always from outside things. You’ve suffered so much, and you're almost my age; someone shouldn't deserve a life like that, it's so... Chaotic…” She sighed.

“I understand…” I murmured, “But how come you feel so emotional about what I’ve been through? We’ve only known each other for a few days. What gives?” I quizzed.

“I just care, there’s nothing secret about it… I just feel really sympathetic towards these things, you’ve thrown away everything for us, you’ve suffered so much and are still willing to give up your future to help us. I respect you for that, I know we haven’t known each other long, but I see you as my friend already; so why should I not care?” She told me.

As though her words were coated in honey, I was warmed from the inside by them. I had a small flashback of the other day when I was on the bus on my way to the leisure centre, how I daydreamed about how kind and happy Equestria was. It was then when I realised, this was it. This was what I was daydreaming about. This sort of kindness, and care.
Right in front of me was the thing I’d be wanting for so long.
Friendship…

I leant forward and gave her another hug.

“Are you ok?” She asked.

“Never better.” I replied quietly, before letting out a small sigh of joy and emotion.

I was friends with Fluttershy; we were actually friends!

“WE HIT TURBULENCE!” Pinkie screamed from the middle of the cargo hold.

The plane shook once again and I detached from Fluttershy as I was catapulted into Pinkie. A suitcase fell down and hit Pinkie in the head, much to my relief, her bouncy mane took most of the impact.

“Thanks for the warning Pinkie.” I said when things died down.

“No problem!” She squealed as she pounced on the suitcase like a cat.

I looked around to see the others and found they were all fine, and went back to chatting amongst themselves, I looked back to Fluttershy to see her giggling to herself. I got up and headed back to her, on my way there Pinkie yelled ‘We hit turbulence!’ again, and I was launched back, then hurled to the sideways and landed next to Twilight.

“Hey Purple.” I chuckled, brushing myself off.

She looked at me with a dull expression.

“Our altitude is decreasing, pressure outside is increasing.” She said before looking beyond me.

I turned to see the pressure bubble wobbling a bit, Twilight was right, there was a big change in pressure; the other’s noticed it as well.

“Are we landing?” Rainbow Dash called to me.

“I think so!” I called back.

There was suddenly a loud noise at the front and the back of the cargo hold, the sound of heavy machinery moving, it was the sound of landing gear.

“Hold on to something!” I yelled.

Applejack, Fluttershy, and Rarity ran to the side and held on to the metal bars there, Pinkie dived headfirst into a pile of suitcases, and Twilight ducked down low to reduce her momentum. Upon checking the others were in position, I ran towards the side of the hold, I was about halfway when the plane touched down and the whole cargo hold shook violently; I was launched into the air and flew forward.

“Oh god!” I shouted in mid-air, before smacking into a suitcase pile.

Upon crashing a blunt pain ran across my right arm, which I had put in front of me to break my fall, the wind was knocked right out of me, and I flopped onto my back, only to have a suitcase slide off the pile and fall onto my belly, winding me a second time, and causing me to let out a large ‘Argh!’
When the plane stopped shaking, the others all ran to me.

“Dude are you alright?” Rainbow Dash asked, full of alarm.

“Darling! Say something!” Rarity gasped.

“Is he ok?” Fluttershy squealed.

“Give the guy space!” Dashie commanded.

They all took a step back, before Rainbow Dash knelt down next to me.

“Dude? You ok?” She asked.

“Muuurrrrrr…….” I groaned.

I gently sat up and leaned against the cases behind me; Twilight then closed the pressure bubble, and the glow around us all faded away, and I felt slightly cooler.

“We’re here.” Twilight said.

We had reached Brazil.

Chapter Fourteen: Welcome to the Jungle

Chapter Fourteen - Welcome to the Jungle

Twilight was right, we had arrived and the plane had come to a complete stop, we needed to get out of here, and fast.

“What now?” Rainbow Dash asked.

I listened out for all the sounds, I heard the footsteps of people above us, the passengers were getting up. Along with that, was the sound a vehicle from outside, most definitely the luggage transportation thing which takes the contents of the cargo hold to the airport.

“We need a plan.” I said.

“Well think of one!” Twilight snapped.

“Oh, so you’re promoting me to group leader now? Alrighty then!” I retorted and turned around.

“Hey! Shut your trap human! You are not leading this gr-”

“Then think of a plan, smartass!” I butted in.

“Well we need to hide somewhere!” She yelled.

“No… Really?” I shouted sarcastically.

“Keep it down.” Rarity said cautiously.

“Let’s just get our flanks off this plane and find a better place to hide, where we can make a real plan.” Applejack commanded.

I looked around to Applejack and nodded, the others gathered around me, I then turned back to Twilight.

“Cast an invisibility spell on us so we can get out here undetected.” I ordered.

“I have low mana thanks to you, casting that on all of us would use it all up.” She said.

“No mana, is better than no chance of getting off this plane without being taken away, to be tested on and abused by scientists, and we wouldn’t like that, would we Twilight?” I retorted.

The look of fear in her eyes told me she had made up her mind without a second thought; her horn lit up and we all vanished from sight, luckily we could still see one another due to the purple glow radiating out of us.
Seconds later, the large door to the cargo hold opened, I headed over there and the others followed me. A man leaned in and yelled something, a conveyor belt then came down into the cargo hold, and the man jumped down into the hold.

“Now what?” Rainbow Dash whispered.

“Shh.” I hissed back.

The man started putting the suitcases on the conveyor belt, as a second man jumped in and also started putting on cases.

“Get on that conveyor, one at a time, regroup outside.” I ordered.

They all went ahead and crept behind the men, one by one, they hopped on and managed to slip out of the plane unnoticed.
By the time they were all out, half the cargo hold had been emptied, I needed to make a move.

“Trabalhar mais rápido!” One of the men shouted.

Whatever the heck that meant, told me that I needed to get a move on, I didn’t know much of Portuguese, but I knew that ‘rápido’ meant ‘fast’. The man in front of the belt moved to get a case, and that’s when I slipped past him and hopped onto the belt, I slid up and out the door.

I was temporally blinded by the bright sun, upon blinking a few times I saw the airport, looking down from that were the glowing purple outlines of the others, I crept down the stairs and then jumped off the vehicle’s extendable ladder onto the hard ground. Beyond the plane was a small grass area, a little way after that was a large body of water.

“Where to now?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“We need to find somewhere to hide before this spell wears off.” Rarity said.

I looked to the end of the runway to see green, lots and lots of green; a jungle.

“We can hide in there.” I suggested, pointing toward the huge greenery in the distance.

“Then let’s make a move.” Applejack ordered.

Without a moment’s hesitation, we all started trotting to our new destination, well, I jogged. Trotting wasn’t really a thing I did...

After a minute or so of jogging, we came to a fence, a rather tall fence, and in good time as well, as the spell wore off and we all fizzled back into vision.

“Now what?” Rarity asked.

“Simple.” Rainbow Dash giggled and she jumped into the air and then flew over the top.

“Yeah, now come up with a solution that suits all of us.” Applejack moaned.

“Buck the fence down?” Dash shrugged.

“You know, that don’t seem like a bad idea…” Applejack hummed.

She turned around and tensed her muscles, which was when I noticed something on the fence; barbed wire…

“No! Wait!” I shouted, but not fast enough.

Her hooves made contact with the chain-link fence; the loud metallic clashing sound emitted from the fence caused me to cringe, to know how hard Applejack had struck it.

“AAAARRRGH FUCK! MY HOOF!” She yelled, hopping backwards.

“Oh shit!” Rainbow Dash gasped, noticing the barbed wire.

Applejack fell onto her side and clutched her hind leg and gasped loudly, before letting out a long growling moan of pain.

“What happened?” Rarity asked, full of panic.

“The… Fence!” Applejack gasped before squinting her eyes shut.

“What about it? I don’t see any…” Rarity stopped mid-sentence, as she saw the cause of Applejack’s pain.

The whole fence was coated in the long barbs, and right in the middle of the panel, a long barb was slightly bent, and coated in dark, thick blood.

“Oh gosh!” Rarity whinnied as she dropped to her knees to inspect the wound.

I too, squatted to see the damage; right in the centre of her back left hoof, was a deep hole, blood was oozing out of the wound. All around the hard ground were droplets of blood; the wound was bleeding quite a lot. I was about to get a closer look when Fluttershy got in the way and gave the wound a proper inspection.

“Gah! Don’t touch it!” Applejack shouted as Fluttershy gently applied pressure to her hoof.

“I can help this, but not here, we need to move.” Fluttershy explained.

“Need me to carry you?” I offered.

“I don’t need your charity.” Applejack growled in pain as she managed to stand up on three legs.

I looked along the fence line, and saw a small gate in the distance.

“Over there.” I pointed out.

“Let’s move, quickly! We’re still at risk of being seen here.” Twilight commanded.

Applejack growled once more as she began to uneasily trot on three legs, Twilight stayed by her side and the others kept the same pace, I jogged ahead to make sure the gate was safe.
I reached the gate, luckily there was no barbed wire, but there was yet another problem. Just below the handle was a large padlock, about the size of my palm. It was pretty rusty, it should break with enough force.

“Well? Can we get through?” Applejack groaned.

“There’s a lock on it.” I replied.

“Fuck sake…” Rainbow Dash muttered under her breath from the other side of the fence.

“Language Rainbow Dash!” Rarity shouted.

I ran my fingers over the lock, and then tapped it with my knuckle, a hollow metallic ring came from it, the lock was absolutely busted.

“Stand back Dash.” I ordered.

“Why?” She asked.

“Applejack’s not the only one with some strength around here.” I replied as I took a few steps back.

The others all moved away as I tensed all my muscles and took a deep breath; due to my boxing experience I had become a very top-heavy person, kicking wasn’t overly my thing, so I decided to settle in with a full body slam onto the gate.

“Don’t go hurting yourself as well now…” Rarity mumbled.

I ignored her comment and prepared to charge. On a mental count of three I rushed toward the gate and crashed into it with all my might, perhaps even a little too much; the lock broke easily and the gate flew open, causing me to hurtle forward right into Rainbow Dash. She let out a yelp as my head smacked into her chest, causing her to fall to the ground, and me to fall on top of her in the process.

“Gah! Get off of me dude!” She wheezed, trying to push me off.

I rolled to the side and stood up, I then turned around to see the others walking through the demolished gateway, the top hinge had been broken. I guess I was stronger than I thought.

“My, you are stronger than you look.” Rarity said.

“Yeah yeah, I could have done that if it weren’t for my damn hoof.” Applejack snorted, before wincing in pain again.

“It’s no competition.” I replied.

“Whatever…” Applejack sniffed.

“Can you two bicker later? We need to find a place to camp.” Rarity said, rolling her eyes.

I sighed, Rarity was right, we had to get into a more secluded area, anyone looking out the airport windows would be able to see us if they looked hard enough; we may have been a way off from the airport, but we were still visible.

“We’re still in the open.” Fluttershy whimpered.

“Then let’s go!” Rainbow Dash pressed.

We all began to walk into the jungle, when Applejack fell down. I knelt to her side.

“You ok?” I asked.

“Gah, it’s this damn saddlebag, I can’t walk on three legs and carry this.” She gasped.

“Want me to take it?” I offered.

“Don’t let him have it, you won’t get it back again.” Twilight growled.

“Do you honestly think I’d steal from you when I’m going to be travelling with you for months on end?” I asked rhetorically.

Twilight bit her lip, then stormed ahead of the group; I helped take off Applejack’s saddlebag and slung it over my shoulder.

“Hey.” She groaned.

“Yeah?”

“Thanks.” She said, dipping her head.

“It’s the least I can do.” I replied with a smile.

“What’s the most?”

“I could carry you.” I answered.

“Get lost, it’s just my hoof, not a broken leg.” She scoffed.

We both laughed as she got up and I walked beside her into the jungle with the others.

The sights, sounds and smells of the jungle were like nothing I’d ever experienced, everywhere I looked was a sea of green, the sound of birdsong and the buzzing of insects was almost deafening; the smells were so fresh and natural, no smell of smoke, petrol, and the city. I looked up to see more green as the trees towered above us, small rays of sunlight peaked through the canopy and flickered as the leaves swayed about. A bright blue bird flew above and shot out of sight in seconds, it was amazing. It was like I had stepped into another world…

“Some scenery huh?” Applejack said, noticing my amazement.

“Yeah, I’ve seen nothing like it; it’s like a new planet to me.” I answered, still star struck.

“How do you think we feel? We’re actually on a new planet!” She chuckled.

“That is a fair point.” I agreed, chuckling with her.

We were walking for some time, when I decided to ask Applejack what was on my mind.

“So, why are you chilled with me now? I thought you disliked me back in the cargo hold.” I asked.

Applejack giggled.

“Oh Sugarcube, I don’t dislike ya; I just don’t appreciate you hitting my friends and all. I think you could have handled that situation better; I’ve only known you a short while, so as much as you’ve thrown away your life to help us, I can’t put all my trust into you. It’s nothing personal, honest.” She explained.

“I understand, thanks.” I said, now very much relieved.

“No problem, and thanks again for holding the bag and all.” She replied, gritting her teeth at the pain in her hoof.

We continued walking into the jungle, taking in all the sights and sounds as we went.
A little while later, we came to a halt.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“You tell me.” Applejack shrugged.

I walked ahead to see Twilight crouched down with a hoof to her forehead.

“What’s up egghead?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Nothing, I’m fine.” Twilight growled back.

She was certainly not fine, she was stumbling around as if she were drunk; just as I reached her, she fell over.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“Nothing of your concern, human.” She said.

“Well you’re preventing the whole group from continuing, so it is my concern. So I’ll ask again, what’s wrong?” I told her.

Twilight shook her head and tried to get up, and managed to get to her knees.

“Do you need my help?” I asked.

“No.” She growled.

“You look like you need assistance.” I said, putting my hand on her elbow to help her up.

She pushed me back and fell down again.

“Don’t touch me!” She snapped.

“Calm it, I’m trying to help.” I replied.

“I don’t need your help.” She spat.

“Then get up.” I spoke coldly.

I walked away and went to Rarity.

“What’s up with her? She’s all dizzy and uncoordinated.” I asked.

“Looks like she overused her mana from all the spells lately.” Rarity suggested.

“That’s a thing?” I queried with a head on one side.

“Indeed; when a unicorn uses all their mana, they can still cast spells, but it breaks down fluids and blood instead. Basically, Twilight is just extremely dehydrated.” She explained.

“You’re saying she can’t cast any more spells now right?” I asked.

“Not for a good few days now, no.” Rarity answered.

“Even if she re-hydrates?”

“I’m afraid so, even if she drinks plenty of water, her body will prevent her from casting spells unless it’s a dire life or death situation, it’s like a natural defence mechanism.” She told me.

“I see…” I mumbled.

I walked back to Twilight who was getting up properly now, and was trying to open her saddlebag.

“Need a hand with that?” I asked.

“No, go away.” She answered sourly.

“A please would be nice.” I retorted.

“Fuck off.” She muttered.

“What was that?”

“Nothing.”

“Good, for a second there I thought you were being a rude little bitch.” I said.

She glared at me, and I chuckled; I found my new relationship with Twilight rather amusing, it was quite comical for such a tense and hateful attitude. I opened my backpack and offered her my bottle of water.

“I don’t need your poison.” She said, snorting.

“You’re dehydrated, drink.” I ordered.

“You can’t tell me what to do.” She mumbled, looking at the water.

She clearly wanted the water, but was reluctant to take it from ‘the human’.

“Fine, don’t have the water, stay dehydrated and dizzy, and risk a seizure or two.” I replied and began to walk away again.

“Wait.” She said.

I turned around to see her looking longingly at the water.

“I’ll have some.”

I rolled my eyes and handed the bottle to her, her horn lit up to pick up the bottle, and her magic instantly deactivated, and she rubbed her temple with her hoof.

“Looks like someone’s going to need a hand after all.” I said with a grin.

“Don’t even think about it.” She spat back, stumbling over to Rarity.

I stood there and watched Twilight tell Rarity to help her, and levitate her drink for her; as I was watching, Rainbow Dash came and sat next to me.

“What’s up with Purple Smart?” She asked.

“Out of mana, so she’s basically useless at all basic life tasks.” I replied.

“Seriously? How does she think pegasai and earth ponies deal with it?” She said, rolling her eyes.

“Give the mare a break, she’s out of mana, she barely has the strength to stand up.” Applejack said from behind me.

“Sneakily listening in are we AJ?” Dash accused.

“The word’s ‘eavesdropping’.” I corrected.

“Egghead.”

“Bovvered?”

“No!” Dash playfully growled.

The three of us chuckled, before Twilight came forward with the others, still a little unbalanced.

“We need to find a bearing so we know where we’re headed.” She announced.

“How can we do that when you have no mana?” I asked.

“I don’t know, I’m thinking…” She replied.

“Can’t Rarity cast the spell?” Rainbow Dash quizzed.

“I don’t know it.” Rarity sighed.

“What about your search spell? Like you use to find gems?” I suggested.

“That would work if the shard was in a visible range, but that spell doesn’t work with things out of sight.” She explained.

“What about your cutie mark story? Where your horn pulled you towards your life goal, surely you could manipulate that effect with something.” I said.

Rarity hummed, and then huffed.

“I wouldn’t be able to rely on that, my horn wouldn’t be that accurate for the whole journey.” She said.

“You could always enchant something with that spell so it points to the orb shards.” I shrugged.

“That’s a great idea!” Rarity cheered.

“What… Did you just say?” Twilight asked, glaring at me.

“I, said, we could enchant something with Rarity’s-”

“How do you know about enchanting!? You have no magic!” Twilight shouted, pointing a hoof at me.

“Yeah, there’s no way you should know that, what gives?” Applejack asked.

“I’ve played some video games in my life, and a lot of them have enchanting in them.” I explained.

“That’s a lie! How did you know?” Twilight accused.

“I just told you.” I replied.

“What are these stupid, games then?”

“Skyrim, Runescape, RPGs like that. Oh, and I used to play World of Warcraft once upon a time…” I answered, chuckling.

“This isn’t funny you lying scum!” Twilight shouted.

“Hey, there’s no need to talk to him like-”

“Shut your trap Rarity! I’m sick of you sticking up for this creature when you don’t even know him!” Twilight yelled.

“Calm down y’all…” Applejack said, but to no avail.

“I want the truth out of you! You knew about the days at home being years here, and now you know this! Tell me how you know!” Twilight yelled, now breathing heavily in anger.

“Calm your tits Sparkle, I’m not some secret evil spy.” I joked.

“Well I don’t know that now do I? For all I know, you have the single intent to just learn more about our weaknesses so you can kill us later on!” She shouted.

I had no words left to say, she was just being ridiculous now; after a few seconds of silence, Rainbow Dash spluttered and started chuckling.

“This is not funny!” Twilight screeched.

“Oh wait, you were serious?” Dash asked, stifling her laugh.

“Yes!”

“Oh, ok. Let me laugh even harder!” Rainbow Dash squealed and fell to the ground, rolling around in tears of laughter.

“Shut up Rainbow Dash!”

“How about you shut up? Before you attract every living thing in Brazil; seriously, you’re sounding off like a bloody rape alarm!” I butted in.

Twilight glared at me and growled loudly.

“Can it.” I said bluntly.

“You can’t tell me what to do human!” She spat.

That was it, she was bringing me to the level of pissed-offity! I walked up to her and towered above her.

“You’re going to shut that bitchy little muzzle of yours, or I’m going to break it off and crush it to a bloody paste…” I threatened, lowering my tone to a deep growl.

The look of fear in her eyes was almost painful to watch, her pupil and iris shrunk to around the size of my damn fingernail; her lip started quivering, I had genuinely horrified her. She nodded nervously and took a few shaky steps back.

“Good girl.” I smirked.

I turned around and looked at the others, who were all looking at me as if I were a whole new person.

“That was uncalled for.” Applejack said quietly, and walked past me to comfort and how petrified Twilight.

Fluttershy followed Applejack to help her out with her wounded hoof, and I noticed her trying to take off her saddle bag, no doubt to take out that Kuphilla Amanzi stuff.

I walked to the others calmly and squatted down with Rarity and Dash.

“Sorry it got to that level.” I sighed.

“Please tell me you wouldn’t actually…?” Rarity stuttered.

“What? Do what I said to Twi? Jesus, no. Not at all. Rarity I wouldn’t even think of contemplating such a thing. It was just to put her in her place and shut her up. She needs to realise that I have more experience about this place than her, and she needs my help to get this group through the mission, and she can’t stand the fact she needs to rely on someone else’s help.” I explained.

“I understand, just, please watch what you say when Pinkie’s in earshot.” Rarity pleaded.

“You got it.” I smiled.

I looked around to find Pinkie was nowhere to be seen.

“Well, firstly, she’s not in earshot, and secondly, where is she?” I asked.

“Probably exploring.” Dash said.

“Oh yeah, great, exploring, in a hostile jungle, good idea.” I deadpanned sarcastically.

“It’s fine.” Rarity hummed, using her magic to make the squeaky toy sound again.

There was a rustling in the bushes a few metres away, and suddenly Pinkie burst out of them like a crazy cat.

“Where’s the squeaky!?” She squealed and ran around.

I raised my eyebrows in surprise, but remained silent.

“As for what you said to Twi,” Rainbow Dash said, bringing me back to her attention.” “That was some intense shit, I don’t think she’s going to argue with you for like, ages! I mean seriously dude, you’re one scary motherfucker when you want to be…” She said, chuckling a little.

“Rainbow, for the tenth time, watch, your, language!” Rarity scolded, frowning hard at Dash.

“I’m twenty, not a little filly.” Dash answered back.

“It doesn’t make it right Dash, I’m with Rarity on this one. There’s a time and a place for bad language, you just keep swearing impulsively, and I tell you now, it’s not attractive.” I said, backing up Rarity.

“Okay, I’ll cut it out.” Dash moaned, dipping her head.

“Right, with Sparky and your lip out the way, can we please get on with enchanting something? It’s late into the afternoon and we need a bearing before it gets dark.” I pointed out.

“As much as Twi went nuts, how do you know about enchanting?” Rainbow Dash quizzed.

“I already told you, video games. Like the TV stuff, but you control a virtual character and do stuff, and in some of those games there is magic and enchanting and stuff.” I repeated with some extra detail to clear their doubts.

“Like that thing you playing on that box thing in your room the same day you met us? The X Box wasn’t it?” Rarity asked.

“That’s the one, the Xbox, but that was a game called Mirrors Edge, not so much magic in that one.” I answered, chuckling slightly.

“I liked it, it was so cool with all the running up walls and stuff.” Dash said, smiling at the thought of free running.

Rarity cleared her throat.

“Yeah, um, on with the enchanting then?” I said sheepishly.

“While you and Twilight had your little verbal war, I was able to single out the right spell to enchant with; I just need an object to enchant.” She explained.

“What sort of object?” I asked.

“Just any solid object really, I would enchant one end, and it will point towards the closest shard as long as one of us is holding it.” She told me.

“So, like a stick or something?” I suggested.

“Too basic, it could break or get lost, we need something that’s going to be on us at all times.” Rarity replied.

“How about your hooves or something? Then you’ll constantly be pulled in the right direction.” I hummed.

“How about ‘no thank you’? I’ve been dragged across half of Equestria once, and I shan’t let it happen again. We need an object.” Rarity dismissed.

“Beep boop beep!” Pinkie squealed.

“Shush Pinkie, we’re trying to think.” Rarity hushed.

“Beep boop beep!” Pinkie squealed again, louder.

“Pinkie please, just can it for a sec.” Dash moaned.

“No, beep! Boop! Beep!” Pinkie said insistently.

“I don’t get it.” Rainbow Dash sighed.

Pinkie randomly walked to me and head-butted my thigh.

“What is it Pinkie?” I asked, finding her behaviour both cute and strange.

“Beep boop beep! Beepity beep! Boop bubba beep!” She squeaked and head-butted my thigh a second time.

“Cut it out Pinkie.” I chuckled, gently pushing her head back.

“Vvvvrrrr! Vvvvrrrr!” She buzzed.

“Called it; Pinkie’s loose screw fell out.” Dash said dully.

I rubbed my leg where she’s been hitting her head into, and ran my fingers over the shape of my phone in my pocket; I pulled it out to make sure she hadn’t damaged it.
I hit the on button, it made a small ‘beep’ sound, and then it vibrated.

“Vvvvrrrr! Vvvvrrrr!” Pinkie continued to buzz.

That’s when it hit me…

{Pinkamena Diane Pie, you are a fucking genius…} I thought to myself, grinning.

“What’s so funny?” Rainbow Dash questioned.

“I just figured it out…” I mumbled.

“Care to share?” Rarity asked.

I hit the vibrate test button on my phone, and it went ‘Vvvvrrrr. Vvvvrrrr’.

“Get out…” Rainbow Dash breathed quietly.

“Unbelievable…” Rarity mumbled, putting a hoof to her mouth.

“Pinkie you absolute genius!” I shouted merrily, pointing at her with a huge grin.

“Woop! Woop! Woohoo!” Pinkie squealed.

Rainbow Dash flew up to her and lifted Pinkie into the air in a celebratory hug.

“I’m not sure what’s more outstanding, Pinkie’s idea, or the fact you sussed it out…” Rarity said, still bewildered by the whole riddle.

“I’m voting on Pinkie’s idea, how does she just, know these things?” I asked.

“Celestia knows how, but heck, she does...” Dash giggled, coming back to the conversation.

“I doubt even the princess can figure out Pinkie.” Rarity chuckled.

The three of us laughed, and I then turned my phone back on, which had gone on standby again.

“Hey, do you think you could merge the spell with this thing’s tech to make the enchantment better?” I suggested.

“How so?” Rarity asked.

“Well, back when Twilight and I were infiltrating the airport, Twilight’s magic was able to hijack the security lock like it was a piece of cake. Maybe your spell could work with an application on my phone, making the search for the orb easier.” I explained.

“Cake!?” Pinkie shouted.

“Raisins.” Rainbow shouted back.

“Ok! Never mind!” Pinkie squealed in response before jumping on a log and prowled on it like a big cat.

I had no words, I just looked at Dash with confusion.

“Raisin cakes or current cakes, the only two cakes in the universe she doesn’t like.” Dash explained.

I chuckled, yet another thing I had in common with Pinkie, I also couldn’t stand such atrocities for cakes.

“Back on track,” Rarity smiled, “can I enchant this device of yours so we can get our bearing, I don’t want to trek in the jungle for the next bunch of days.”

I nodded, and held out my phone, before taking it back again.

“Hang on a sec, I’ll find an app for us to use, so the whole phone system doesn’t get converted.” I said.

I browsed through my apps, and went to my Maps app.

“Go for it.” I said, handing out my phone again.

Rarity’s horn lit up, and she pointed it at my mobile. As the horn made contact, the phone’s screen went pure white, and then began to flash quickly. It then began to vibrate violently, it became incredibly warm, almost too hot to handle; the hairs on my arm began to stand on end as static electricity radiated from the device.

“Bloody hell…” I mumbled.

I’d seen magic in video games, and now before my own eyes, but when you actually felt the sheer warmth and power of magic, it was so much more intense; seeing it was one thing, feeling it was another.

The glow of Rarity’s horn died out, and the phone screen went black, I touched the screen and nothing happened.

“I think you fried its circuits.” I said with a frown.

“Well that sucks.” Rainbow Dash groaned.

I hit the power button, and still nothing happened.

“Perhaps it needs to cool down?” Rarity suggested.

“Possibly.” I shrugged.

“Have you had any luck with the enchanting?” Fluttershy quizzed, coming to join us.

“Well, we’ve enchanted my phone, but it’s now not working; we’re going to leave it for a while and try later.” I answered.

“Oh, um, ok…” She replied.

“You alright?” I asked.

“Um, yes, I’m just a little tired.” She said, blinking a few times.

“As am I, I haven’t slept very well since we came to this place.” Rarity admitted.

“I’m not surprised, being in a new world must be quite a shocker.” I said.

“It’s not just that, it’s the gravity, your planet is a bit bigger than ours, the gravity’s just a tad stronger here, I’ve felt a little bit heavier.” She explained.

“Huh, interesting.” I hummed, processing the newly given information.

“It’s not a huge change, but it’s still noticeable.” She said.

“Fair doos.” I hummed again, nodding.

“Makes flying a bitc- uh, I mean, it makes flying a little bit harder.” Rainbow Dash said, giggling as she censored herself.

“Can we set up camp? I’d really like to rest my legs a little.” Fluttershy asked.

“Hm, the sun is starting to set, so I guess it’s a good idea.” Rarity hummed.

Dash trotted over to Applejack and Twilight to tell them the new plan.

“Callum?” Fluttershy asked.

I looked to her and gave a small confused hum.

“Can we talk?” She asked.

“Sure.” I answered merrily.

“We’ll go ahead and set up camp, don’t fall too far behind.” Rarity sang.

I smiled to Rarity, and then turned to sit with Flutters.

“What’s up?” I asked, planting my rump onto the soft ground.

“Well, um, I was wondering about something, about you humans…” She asked nervously.

“Go on…?” I quizzed.

“Well, I’ve noticed your teeth. You have canines…” She mumbled, looking at the ground.

“Oh…” I said.

{Well, fuck…} I thought to myself, swallowing slightly.

“Do you… Um… Do… You…?” She started, but stopped.

She looked at me with a troubled look, not sure how to ask the question without offending me, but she looked at me as if to say ‘you know exactly what I’m trying to ask you’.
And she was right, I completely knew what her question was, and it was a question I had been dreading since I met the six.
I sighed before I gave my answer.

“Yes Fluttershy… I do.” I answered.

“I eat meat…”

Chapter Fifteen: On The Shy

Chapter Fifteen - I don't bite... Much...

“Ok.” Fluttershy hummed.

“I’m sorry…” I mumbled guiltily.

I felt terrible, the poor mare must be horrified, and must hate my guts; out of all the ponies, it had to be Fluttershy who found out first…

“What for?” Fluttershy quizzed.

“What do you mean, ‘what for’? You know exactly what I’m sorry for.” I answered.

“It’s ok, I’m not angry at you.” Fluttershy said calmly.

“What?” I said, astonished.

“I’m not angry at you. You have canine teeth, I figured you were an omnivore from the first day we met, when you let me into the house and smiled at me.” She explained.

“So… So, wait, you don’t hate me? You’re n-not going to yell at me? N-Not even berate me a little bit?” I stuttered nervously.

“Of course not, all different kinds of animals have different diets. I need to help the ferrets catch fish, and I even know a bear that eats other animals. It’s the natural way of life.” She said.

“B-But, they have feeling and emotions back in Equestria, don’t they feel guilt and sadness?” I asked.

“Well, the bear does a little bit, but he only hunts on the Everfree Forest animals, where they have no consciences; the fish don’t remember things, and are just as simple as the animals in the Everfree. It’s over very quickly; I find it sad to watch, but it’s just their way of life. There’s nothing I can do to change it without changing the animals’ diet, which is unfair.” She said, sighing.

“So let me get this straight… You don’t mind, that I eat meat?” I asked, trying to keep calm as I talked about the subject.

“As long as the animal feels no pain, and you are not cruel to them, and that you respect the natural balance of life, I don't mind, no.” She said, smiling at me reassuringly.

Like a cool breeze in a hot room, I felt a huge wave of relief and relaxation; the fear of Fluttershy knowing about my diet and taking it the wrong way was very prominent, so this new turn of events was really beneficial.

“You have no idea how much that means to me Fluttershy, I’ve been worried about the subject from day one.” I said, taking another sigh of relief.

“I noticed; when Pinkie asked what food you ate, I saw the look of fear in your eyes.” She told me.

“You’re quite the observer aren’t you?” I said, chuckling very lightly to try and relax.

“I did a lot of social work at one point.” She admitted.

“So, you’ve been a nurse, a country heroine, an animal expert, a babysitter, and a therapist?” I asked, laughing.

She blushed and started giggling.

“Don’t, really, I’m not that special.” She squeaked.

“Not that special? Fluttershy, you’re one of the kindest ponies I know.” I said.

“How many ponies do you know?” She retorted.

“Seven actually.”

“Who’s the seventh?” She asked.

“A pony I used to look after once, Gitano.” I answered.

“Oh?” She tilted her head on one side.

“A farm pony, I used to go to the stables once every other week to tend to the animals, and I always gave Gitano a lot of attention, so we kinda bonded.” I explained.

“So, you have ponies on Earth?” She asked, now very interested.

“Yeah, horses too. But they’re not exactly like you Equestrians.” I answered.

“How so?”

“Well, they’re not sentient, they’re no more intelligent than a dog.” I explained.

“I see…” She hummed, thinking about the new information about fellow equines.

“We should get moving before we get lost.” I said.

“Good idea.” Fluttershy agreed.
I stood up and put my rucksack back on, and then turned back to Fluttershy.

“Hey, thanks for talking to me, I’ve felt a little stressed about the matter.” I said, dipping my head respectfully and giving her a little smile.

“It’s ok.” She replied happily.
She then got up and put on her saddlebag, and we both headed after the others.

It was quite a long trek before we caught up, not too far ahead we saw them all sitting in a circle talking amongst themselves.
Before we reached them, I tapped Fluttershy lightly on the shoulder.

“Can you not tell them yet? I don’t feel comfortable with them knowing for a while, not until I’ve gained their trust a little more, I have a hunch they won’t take it as well as you have.” I asked.

She gave a little hum and nodded her head in response, showing she completely understood and empathised with me on the situation.

“Thanks…” I said quietly, before we both walked to the others.

“G’day g’day ladies!” I said in an Australian accent as I merged with the circle.

“There you are! We assumed the jungle had eaten you up by now!” Rarity chuckled.

“Nah, I don’t taste that good.” I replied.

The ponies all laughed and I entered the circle and sat down, Fluttershy joined me and sat right next to me.

“So, what were you two talking about?” Rarity asked.

“Oh, um, nothing important…” Fluttershy whispered.

“I reckon they were making out.” Rainbow Dash said, chuckling.

As if she had been punched directly in the clitoris, Fluttershy screamed in shock and jumped about five feet in the air, and then hid under her tail.

“Well, that was a reaction and a half…” I mumbled.

“Rainbow, you know full well that’s not funny.” Rarity frowned.

“Oh come on, it was just a joke.” Dash answered back.

“It’s not a funny one, you know, and have been told many a time about how fearful Fluttershy is about relationships.” Rarity hissed.

“Oh really, then what about ‘Middy’?” Rainbow teased.

“Stop it! Stop it!” Fluttershy wailed and ran behind a nearby tree as she started to cry.

I simply raised an eyebrow in confusion, then looked to Rarity, who was now glaring at Rainbow Dash.

“You spiteful, inconsiderate-”

“Stop.” I ordered before Rarity can finish.

She turned to me, as did Dash.

“But she-”

“I’m not having you two fall out; Twilight and I is conflict enough for this group.” I said.

Rarity grumbled under her breath, and Rainbow Dash smirked, thinking she’d gotten away with it.

“And you.” I pointed at her.

She gulped.

“You know you’re in the wrong; sort it out.”

She nodded, for some reason, she really didn’t like getting in trouble with me, it seemed she really liked me, so getting in my bad books was distressing for her. Perhaps that’s to do with the My Little Dashie incident?
I stood up and began to walk to the tree Fluttershy ran to.

“Where are you going?” Rarity asked.

“To see if Fluttershy’s alright.” I answered.

She nodded, and the group went back to chatting about random stuff.

I reached the tree to hear very faint sniffles, I walked around it to find Fluttershy rubbing her eyes.

“Hey…” I whispered.

She looked up and me and then looked back down.

“H-Hi…” She stuttered, sniffing.

I walked next to her, sat down, and gently put my hand on her shoulder, feeling her soft fur and warmness beneath it, I was once again reminded how real these ponies are. I mean, I know they are real now, but I still hadn’t quite gotten over the whole ‘I’m on an adventure with the Mane frickin’ Six!’ feeling yet.

“Care to tell me what that was all about?” I asked.

“It- It’s fine, really…” She answered.

“You ran away crying, you’re crying now; therefore, it’s not fine, come on Flutters, you can tell me.” I replied, rubbing her shoulder slightly.

“Well, it’s just… It’s just that I get really shy about relationships, I have a really vivid imagination, when somepony says something, I can picture it in my mind, and when Dash said that, well, yeah…
But I don’t think of you like that, I promise, I really don’t, please don’t think I do…” She explained.

Without control, my face lit up into a great big grin, not because Fluttershy pictured us kissing, as I really wasn't into that.
I was smiling because of two reasons…
Firstly, I found her extremely cute, being so shy about relationship and all that, the way she constantly tried to tell me she didn’t think of me in a romantic way, desperate to make sure it didn’t get awkward, was simply adorable.

The second reason, was because I had discovered yet another thing I had in common with the six; much like Fluttershy, I have a vivid imagination. If someone says any sort of action or scenario, I can instantly visualise it. Heck, once upon a time, my friend Jacob told me about a talking toilet, and I was able to picture myself having a full conversation with the bloody thing!

I brought myself back to Earth, looked at Fluttershy and smiled at her warmly.

“Fluttershy, I wouldn’t ever think of such a thing.” (Although I sort of did, damn my vivid imagination…)

I then remembered what Dash had said in regards to Midnight, so I brought that subject into the conversation.

“Besides, I know that you like this Midnight character, honestly Fluttershy it’s fine.”

“O…Okay…” She whispered.

“Speaking of, what’s Midnight like? He must be pretty special to get the one and only Fluttershy to fall for him.” I said, nudging her shoulder in an attempt to brighten the mood, which it did.

Fluttershy looked up dreamily, and then closed her eyes to think about her crush.

“He’s just, so sweet… He’s shy like me, he loves animals and he has his own aviary. He is so kind and caring, once, I ran home crying because I cut myself by accident, and he followed me the whole way just to make sure I was ok.”

She blushed, and then cleared her throat.

“Um, anyway… I’ve known him from a young age, then we parted as he went to a private school, and I went to flight camp. When I moved to Ponyville with Rainbow Dash, I found out he lived nearby in a cottage just over a mile from my place, not far outside the town.
So I sent him a letter and we met up again, and it was really nice; he’s just like me, he loves animals, he can communicate with them, he’s amazing. He’s really cute too, he is quite ditzy, but not in a crazy way; when he talks about something, he never stops talking, but it’s nice. Sometimes I don’t take in what he says, I just listen to the sound of his voice…
Every time I see him I get butterflies in my tummy and I get all flustered.” She said, blushing even deeper.

{By Celestia’s beard, this is the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen in my whole life… Fluttershy has a crush... This is cuter than any fan-fiction, shipping, or fan art I’ve ever seen!} I thought to myself.

I had to use all of my will and might to prevent another ‘hnng’ heart attack, which was quite a challenge with the given circumstances.

“That’s really sweet Fluttershy. He seems like the perfect guy for you.” I told her with a smile.

“Perfect doesn’t even explain him…” She sighed.

“N’awww……”

“Eep…” Flutters squeaked.

“Look, Flutters, I know you’re all nervous about all those sort of feelings, but I honestly don’t think you need to react like you did just now, because Rainbow Dash loves to tease; if you have a big reaction like that, she’ll do it more to see that reaction.
You have a crush on somepony, so what? I’ve had crushes before; heck, I’ve even felt a touch of real love for someone once, but you’ve got to keep it to yourself, or you’ll get poked at for it.” I explained.

She sniffed once more, before raising her head.

“You’re right; it’s hard for me though, I get so nervous, my heart just-”

“I never said it was easy…” I quietly said, interrupting her.

“You’re right… I’ll try not to let Dash get to me.” She said.

“Atta’ girl.” I said gruffly, grinning and nudging her shoulder again.

This made her giggle, a lot. Call it a hunch, but I think I’d really been able to hit it off with Fluttershy, it’s only been a couple of days, yet we were already good friends.
The both of us got up, and we headed back to the group; upon nearing them, I heard their conversation.

“They’re nice and all, but I doubt I’d ever want to date one.” Applejack said.

“I’ve never really been fond of interspecies relationships, so I’d have to pass.” Rarity joined in.

“What about you Dashie? Would you ever try ‘em?” Applejack asked.

“I think they’re pretty awesome, I wouldn’t mind trying it out with human at some point, experimenting is cool.” Dash admitted.

“What about our new two legged friend?” Applejack chuckled.

“Seriously? We just met the guy, I want to get to know him before I decide on that.” Dash giggled back.

“Why would you even think of that thing’s lips on you?” Twilight spat, gagging slightly.

“Well unlike you egghead, I think he’s cool.” Rainbow retorted.

I got down low and crept behind Rainbow Dash, and then crawled into sight.

“Mind if I… Slither in…?” I said in a deep voice.

Rainbow Dash yelped and jumped back, saw me, and punched me in the arm. The others all started laughing, besides Twilight of course, who simply scowled and looked at the ground.

“Dude, don’t creep up on my like that!” She growled.

“Why not?” I chuckled back.

“Because it’s pervy.” She answered, sticking her tongue out.

“Says the one talking about ‘experimenting’ with me.” I retorted.

Her face went dark and her eyes widened with sheer terror, and then she gulped.

“Yeeeaaah… I heard that.” I said.

“I… I… Um… Was… Kidding?” She said nervously.

“If you say so.” I smirked back.

Dash took a few steps back, and sat down, and went very quiet; Fluttershy then came and sat next to me, giggling slightly at the scene.

“What goes around, comes around.” I whispered to her, giving her a little wink.

“I am so bored…” Pinkie moaned.

Come to think of it, we hadn’t actually done anything fun since the game of hide and seek.

“How about we play a game?” Fluttershy suggested.

“I like your thinking!” Pinkie squeaked, “What game shall we play?”

“No wide games, before you get any ideas, this place is dangerous, we need to stay put here.” I reminded the group.

“What can we play then?” Pinkie asked.

“I don’t know.” I huffed.

“Let’s just sit back and see what idea comes up first.” Rarity said.

“Yes! Great idea!” Pinkie cheered.

Rarity hummed in confusion and tilted her head on one side.

“See! See!” Pinkie giggled.

The whole group, Twilight included, hummed in confusion and tilted our heads on one side.

“I Spy! We can play I Spy!” Pinkie piped.

And of course my vivid imagination would cause me to visualise the Spy from Team Fortress Two running through the jungle, snorting as he went.

“Well, congratulations Rarity, you’re a victim of Pinkie logic.” I told her, chuckling.

“I… Figured…” Rarity replied, flabbergasted.

“I spy, with my little eye… Something… Green!” Pinkie said.

“Fucking everything around us…” Rainbow Dash mumbled from behind us.

Nopony heard her besides me and Fluttershy, who cringed at the language.
I turned around, looked her in the eyes, glared at her, and then looked back to the group.

“Leaves?” Applejack asked.

“Nope.” Pinkie squeaked.

“The trees?” Fluttershy quizzed.

“Nope.”

“Grass?” I asked.

“Nope.”

“Birds?” Rarity questioned.

“Nope.”

“Frogs?”

“Nope.”

“Nope.”
“Nope.”
“Nope."

About five minutes later, we all gave up.

“Are you sure you give up?” Pinkie asked.

“Yes!” We all shouted for the fourth time.

“It’s Callum’s eyes!” Pinkie squealed, before rolling onto her back with a fit of giggles.

“You’ve got to be kidding…” I mumbled.

Everypony didn’t want to play after that, the joy of the game had been entirely spoilt, upon first try we’d all been beaten, there wasn’t much point in playing.

“Who’s next?” Pinkie asked.

“No one, we ain’t playing.” Applejack huffed.

“Aw… Well, it was fun while it lasted.” Pinkie squeaked.

“If you say so.” Applejack mumbled.

“Why so down Applejack?” Rarity asked, prodding her friend in the arm.

“Well, if you hadn't noticed, my hoof’s in a lot of pain right now, I don’t want to play some stupid game at the moment, if that’s alright with you, your ladyship!” She grunted angrily in reply.

“Come on now, don’t fight.” Pinkie pleaded.

Applejack took a long sigh.

“Sorry Pinkie. I’m just stressed.”

“No need for a sorry. Just don’t fight ok, everything’s ok, so why make a problem out of nothing?” She said, smiling.

“The problem is not the problem. The problem is just your attitude about the problem.” I said in a deep, gruff, yet friendly tone.

Everypony looked at me with a look of confusion, besides Pinkie, who understood it perfectly.

“What?” Dash asked from behind me, who had moved a lot closer to the group.

I moved to the side and let her back into the circle, before explaining.

“Basically, you can have a problem; but if you have a good attitude towards it, it doesn’t actually need to be a problem, it’s something you can sort out easily. If you have a bad attitude about it, it becomes an actual problem.
So if you have no bad attitude about the problem, it’s not a problem.” I told the group.

They all hummed and understood, besides Dash.

“I still don’t get it…”

“Sounds fine to me!” Pinkie squeaked.

“Right, let me use an example.” I said.

“Me and Twilight. She doesn’t like me. To her, I’m a problem, because she has a really bad attitude about me.
Therefore I am a significant problem to her; if she were to be positive and nice to me, then suddenly I’m not a problem anymore.
So her attitude, about me, is the problem.” I explained.

“Hehe, I get it now.” Dash chuckled.

“Once again, he poisons your minds with his words…” Twilight sighed.

“Twilight, please don’t start…” Rarity pleaded.

“Start? I never stopped; but you won’t listen, his forked tongue has already wormed into your brain.”

My left eye twitched a little.

“His filthy little lies have corrupted you…”

I bit my lip.

“His kind is the darkest-”

“Stop!” Fluttershy shouted, cutting Twilight off.

All of us, Twilight included were all taken aback.

“If you can’t say anything kind to him, don’t say anything at all! Every time you open your mouth I hear bad things! Horrible things! I’m stressed enough as it is being in this world so far away from home! And I can’t cope with it anymore Twilight! I just can’t! You’re breaking this entire group with your opinion of Callum! Just keep it to yourself!” She screamed.

She suddenly burst into tears again and ran off into the jungle and disappeared behind a large arrangement of tall grass and plants; we were all left speechless.

“Whoa…” Dash breathed.

{Bloody hell…} I thought.

Twilight looked to where Fluttershy had gone with a look of regret, she then huffed and lay down, looking at the ground.

“I’ll talk to her.” Rainbow Dash said and stood up, stretching.

“Is that wise?” I asked.

“Dude, I’ve known her longer than you have, I know that girl inside and out; and right now, she’s alone and needs somepony to keep an eye on her.” She answered.

“Alrighty then.” I replied, taking a respectful nod.

Dash trotted after Fluttershy and we were all left in silence, nopony really knew what to say.

“Well, I gotta take a wizz! Don’t you go anywhere!” Pinkie squeaked as she stood up and bounced away out of sight.

Thankfully Pinkie had broken the ice a little bit, Applejack shuffled closer to Twilight, and I moved over to Rarity.

“Well… That escalated quickly…” I said quietly to her.

“That poor mare is struggling to cope; this whole experience is just too much all at once, and Twilight keeps pushing her over the edge.” Rarity mumbled, more to herself than to me.

I imagined what it must be like for them right now. To have a happy home, being well known across the country, to be popular and respected. Just living a good life in general, only to be chosen for a mission that takes you away to an unknown place where the chance of death was unbelievably high.
These poor mares must be up to their necks in stress and anxiety, it was no wonder Fluttershy just broke down.

“I understand. This must be pretty hard for all of you.” I sighed.

“Very.” Rarity replied, “My entire business is on halt now, and poor Sweetiebelle-”

“Sorry to butt in Rare, but if you remember correctly, a day at home is a year here. Heck, we’ve only been gone a few seconds! The Princesses probably haven’t even left the room we last saw them, to them, the portal we came through is probably still closing.” Applejack interrupted.

At this, Rarity hummed.

“Now that Pinkie’s brought it up, I could really use the toilet…” I mumbled, more to myself than anyone.

“Yeah, me too.” Applejack responded.

I stood up and headed off away from the group to ‘do what I gotta do’…

One first use of my toilet paper later, I re-joined the group to find Fluttershy had come back, her eyes were slightly bloodshot from the crying.

“He returns!” Rainbow Dash cheered.

“Indeed he does.” I replied with a grin.

I sat down to find the group had opened a small bag of marshmallows, Rarity kindly levitated one over to me.

“Aww, how generous of you Rarity.” I said thankfully.

“I see what you did there!” Dash chuckled.

“Well, to be honest, I saw it as well.” Applejack joined in.

“Really though…?” Rarity sighed.

At this, Pinkie started to laugh.

“Do me! Do me!” She squeaked, still laughing.

“You’re doing it already!” I shouted back and began to laugh with her.

All of us laughed together after that, the tension beforehand had now completely evaporated.

“Has there been any luck with your device?” Rarity asked when we had all calmed down.

“I completely forgot, I’ll check now.” I replied.

I put my hand into my pocket and withdrew my phone and held down the on button, and much to my relief it vibrated. A few seconds later the screen lit up with the Sony Ericson Xpeira logo and made the little start-up jingle

“Are we in?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“We’re about to find out, but the phone itself works, which is a good sign.” I answered.

The others all crowded around me, besides Twilight.

“Twilight, come here and participate, this is important to the mission.” I commanded.

At this, the paranoid, pessimistic, pedantic pissy purple pony huffed, before standing up slowly, she eventually came over to watch; the others kindly made room for her right by my side. She reluctantly stood by me and looked at the phone, I unlocked the device and went to the home screen, before swiping to my Maps app, I tapped the app and the screen went black.

“Is it broken?” Dash asked.

“Your technology is pathetic…” Twilight mumbled.

I had to sustain a laugh at that, but I was not able to retain a small splutter and a chuckle, causing Twilight to growl.
Luckily the situation was dismissed as the app turned on, and showed my house back in England.

“Now what?” Rainbow Dash quizzed.

I put my finger on the screen and the whole map started glitching out before being replaced with static.
When the screen went back to normal, it showed treetops, in Brazil.
The phone was focusing directly on us.

“Whoa…” Applejack breathed.

I tapped the screen and it started to flash blue, and then a white arrow appeared from our location, the map then slowly zoomed out to show more of Brazil, it kept zooming out until the arrow’s tip formed a red circle around a certain location to the west.
The app then switched off and went back to the home screen.

“Why’d it do that?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Not sure.” I replied.

I scrolled back to the app and tapped it, and the phone went black, and then reopened at the home screen again.

“Ah… I know what that is…” Rarity said.

“How could you know?” Twilight scoffed.

“Because I cast the enchantment.” Rarity snapped back suddenly.

Twilight was taken aback by Rarity’s sudden attitude, she wasn’t angry or anything, but the way she responded was powerful and dominant.

“Care to tell us then?” Twilight asked, not so aggressively this time.

“Well, the enchantment is based from my old experience with my cutie mark story, along with my gem finding spell, I basically strung the two together; the thing about my gem finding spell, is that it always needed a recharge, regardless of my mana. No doubt the spell’s effect, now in the phone, needs to recharge, and your map application won’t work until then.” She hypothesised.

“Great, so we now need to wait longer before we can move out.” Dash moaned.

“Nope! We go that way.” Pinkie squeaked, pointing back the way we came.

“What? Why?” Twilight questioned.

“West.” Pinkie simply replied, before diving onto the ground and rolling around like a puppy.

“How do you know that way is west?” I asked.

“On the map, the big flying thingy port was in the west, and the shardy thing was further after that, meaning we need to go that way to get to it, in the westy west west!” She explained, pointing a second time to the direction we needed to go.

“Pinkie, the pony compass…” I said quietly, smirking.

I looked up to see the sky was becoming a dark navy blue, the sun was out of sight thanks to the trees, meaning it was going to be nightfall soon.

“Right, the sun’s setting, we’ll head that way at dawn. Let’s all find a place to camp.” I ordered.

“Who are you to give out the orders?” Twilight questioned.

“Well, unless you want to get ripped to shreds by savage animals whilst travelling through a dark jungle, and never see the light of day again, I suggest you take my advice, as your guide, proclaimed by Princess Celestia herself.” I said, putting a lot of emphasis on the word ‘princess’ just to annoy her.

“Fine…” She hissed, glaring at me.

With that, we all left the clearing and found a more secluded part of the jungle, where we stopped to make camp.

“To minimise the chance of being seen, shall we set up just one tent?” Rarity suggested.

“I don’t think we’d all fit.” Applejack giggled.

“Fatty.” Dash giggled.

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that…” Applejack said aggressively.

We all chuckled for a bit, Applejack clearly knew that Rainbow was only bantering.

“I’ll sleep in a tree, I love tree naps.” Dash stated after the laughter settled down.

“I’ve done a little bit of tree sleeping in my time, I’ll join you.” I said enthusiastically.

“Awesome!” She replied merrily.

That was two bodies out of the single tent, so the other five could quite easily sleep in a single tent if they used the biggest one. They’d just need to squeeze together a little…

After a few minutes of setting up Rarity’s tent, (the largest one, being bigger the other two tents put together), we all sat down and relaxed, Twilight, Pinkie and Applejack went inside the tent, and the rest of us stayed out the front.

“So, what can we do to pass the time?” Rarity pondered.

“Provoke the egghead? That’s always fun!” Rainbow Dash giggled.

I suddenly gasped, causing everyone to look at me with confusion.

“Rainbow Dash… You used a big word!” I cheered, and started clapping.

The pegasus frowned, while Rarity, Fluttershy and I burst into laughter, which caused Dash to smirk at the joke and not take it to heart.

“Don’t get used to it dude…” Dash said, chuckling.

“Shame, you’re cute when you act smart.” I teased.

Dashie blushed and looked away.

“Oh Callum, you are such a tease.” Rarity giggled.

I looked to her and raised my eyebrows.

“Am I now…?” I asked in a deep seductive tone.

Rarity, too, blushed and nervously giggled as she bit her lip, I looked to Fluttershy to find she was desperately trying to hold in a fit of giggles.

“Moving on!” Rarity laughed.

I chuckled and pulled out my phone again to look for an app to pass the time.

“So, what sort of stuff can you do on this little thing?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Quite a few things.” I said, scrolling through my apps. “You can play games, write notes, call people, send people messages, listen to music. Oh, it can work as a light as well.” I explained, tapping the LED light.

“That reminds me of something I wanted to ask you!” Fluttershy chirped.

I tilted my head on one side.

“What sort of music do you listen to? What music do humans make?” She asked.

“A very fine question to ask!” I replied with a grin. “The wonder about the human race, is that we make all sorts of things, including a wide range of musical genres.” I answered.

“Can we hear some?” Rainbow Dash asked enthusiastically.

“Sure!” I agreed merrily.

This to me would be a really good moment for some more bonding with the ponies, and I already had a rough idea of what genres they’d all like, so I took out my headphones and plugged them in and then scrolled to my ‘Walkman’ app.

“I’ve got some certain music types that I think you’ll individually like, who wants to hear first?” I asked.

“Me! Me! Pick me!” Rainbow Dash asked excitedly.

“I can’t wait, please may I have first listen?” Rarity pleaded.

“And this year’s prom queen is… Fluttershy!” I announced, handing the headphones to her.

“She didn’t even say anything!” Rainbow huffed.

“Exactly, she was patient.” I replied, sticking my tongue out at her.

Fluttershy giggled and shuffled closer to me, clearly excited to listen to her first piece of human music. Knowing Fluttershy’s kind nature, I had a feeling that I had a song just for her.

“Just take these and pop them in your ears.” I instructed, offering her the earphones.

“Dude, we know how earphones work, we have them at home.” Dash told me.

I shrugged and then looked back to Fluttershy, who now had the earphones in; I went to my artists and selected Newton Faulkner, who was one of my favourite artists for mellow and heartfelt songs. I scrolled through his songs and found ‘People Should Smile More’, and tapped it.
I could tell the song had started playing, as Fluttershy’s face lit up, her little smile grew and grew into a massive ear to ear grin.

“Well, you seem to have Fluttershy’s taste spot on.” Rarity said with a warm smile.

A couple of minutes later the song ended, and Fluttershy took the earphones out, and beamed even more.

“Oh Callum, that song was just simply wonderful…” She said dreamily.

“My turn!” Rainbow Dash shouted, full of excitement as she shifted over next to me.

“Rarity! How wonderful of you to volunteer next!” I cheered.

“Wha… Oh come on!” Rainbow growled.

Rarity giggled at Rainbow’s annoyance, and used her magic to plug in the earphones. I then scrolled through my music to find something for her. I had a feeling that she’d enjoy the classical pieces, but I settled on something more modern and selected another one of my favourites, Jason Mraz.

“I have a feeling you’ll enjoy this.” I said happily as I selected ‘I’m Yours’.

Rarity’s face first showed confusion as the song started, as it included the sound of an aeroplane, but as the music started, she began to smile, much like Fluttershy.
When Jason Mraz started to sing, Rarity closed her eyes and phased out.

“Is it the same song as my one?” Fluttershy asked.

I shook my head and waited for Rarity’s song to finish.

When the song ended Rarity smiled like never before.

“That was simply divine… His voice is so melodic…” She sighed.

“Yeah, Mr Mraz is pretty good.” I agreed.

“Who?” She quizzed.

“Jason Mraz, he’s the singer in the song.” I explained.

“Oh I see.” Rarity chirped.

I looked over to Rainbow Dash, who was looking at me, prodding the ground with her hoof.

“Would you like your turn Rainbow Dash?” I asked.

Her face brightened up and she looked at me with glee, before nodding frantically. I passed her the earphones and scrolled around while she put them in.
It didn’t take me long to find a song just of her taste.

“This, you are going to just love.” I said as I selected the artist ‘P!nk’.

Initially I was going to introduce her to the song ‘Bad Influence’, but after a few seconds of thought I decided to settle with ‘So What’.
I tapped the song, and it didn’t take long for Rainbow Dash to stick her tongue out with a big grin.

“Yeah heh heh… Now this is awesome music!” She said gruffly.

As the song got to the chorus, she shut her eyes and started to nod her head to the tune.

“This is awesome!” She squealed.

After the song ended, she took the earphones out and grinned.

“You have some awesome music dude.” She chuckled.

“I agree, well, I wouldn’t call it ‘awesome’. But your music is indeed very spectacular.” Said Rarity with a smile.

“I would love to listen to some more…” Fluttershy sighed.

“You can all listen to one more, then we go to bed.” I said with a warm smile.

“Yay…” Fluttershy squeaked.

{Oh no, she did not just do the Flutteryay!} I thought, holding back a ‘hnng’.

I passed Fluttershy the earphones and selected some David Bowie, and played her ‘Golden Years’.

Upon a song and a giggle later, it was Rarity’s turn, who was given ‘Do You Want to Know a Secret’ by ‘The Beatles’. Which was really funny to watch, as Rarity began to nod her head much like Dashie had.

When the song finished, she looked around, rather embarrassed.

“It was very catchy ok?” She said defensively.

For Rainbow Dash, I decided to give her a little more of her spicy tastes, and put on 'The Fear', by Lily Allen.

“I can’t choose which is better!” Dash moaned when the song I had chosen had finished.

“That’s the wonder of music Dashie, you don’t need a favourite, love it all!” I cheered.

The ponies now loved the wonder of human music, and couldn’t wait to hear more, but for now, it was time for bed.

“Come on y’all, we have a long way to go tomorrow, get yourselves sorted for sleeping.” Applejack said, sticking her head out of the tent.

“Party pooper…” Dash groaned.

I stood up and took a stretch, before looking around for a nice tree to join Dash in.
Near the tent was a big tree with a lovely big branch sticking out near the top, big enough to fit me and Rainbow Dash together.

“Night Callum.” Rarity said kindly.

“Goodnight.” Fluttershy beamed.

“Nighty night.” I replied to the both of them, smiling back.

I picked up my bag and jogged over to the tree, Rainbow Dash followed.

“How are you going to get up there?” She asked.

“Well, if you’d be so kind as to hold my bag, I can climb this.” I answered.

“You sure? There’s no branches.”

I pretended to clear my throat as I pointed to a huge web of ivy on the tree, Dash merely hummed, not convinced that I could climb it.
I took off my bag and grabbed onto the largest ivy stalk and began to scale the tree. The ivy had a very nice grip, and I was able to climb it with ease.
With all my upper body strength, I hauled myself up the tree slowly.

“Goodness! Look at him go!” I heard Rarity shout from the tent.

This put me off, and I lost my grip with my left hand and almost fell, I was left dangling by my right hand.

“Dude look out!” Rainbow Dash yelped.

I regained my grip and continued to climb until I reached the big branch.

I hoisted myself up and lay on my stomach, the branch was coated in soft dry moss, which was a very lovely coincidence.
Seconds later Rainbow Dash raised to my level and hovered next to me.

“Heavy bag. Take it. Now.” She ordered, tossing it to me and flexing her tired forelegs.

I just caught the bag by one of the arm straps and was almost pulled off the branch by its weight, causing me to freeze in temporal fear.

“Jesus fucking Christ Rainbow Dash! Be fucking careful!” I yelled angrily.

“Now who’s a potty mouth?” She teased.

“This is not funny! Remember that I don’t have wings, if I fall from here, you’ll be scooping me up of the ground with bloody garden tools!” I growled.

“Alright, chill dude.” Dash said calmly, helping me lift the bag onto the branch.

I opened the bag and pulled out the rock climbing rope I had packed.

“Where’d you get that from?” Dash asked.

“I always come prepared.” I replied, tying the rope to my waist.

I then passed the rope to Rainbow.

“Would you be a lamb and wrap this around the branch?” I asked.

She simply nodded as the rope was in her teeth, and she whizzed around the branch a few times before giving me back the rope end.

“Cheers.”

“No problem.” She said, smiling.

She landed next to me and curled up, and was asleep in minutes; I closed my eyes and tried to sleep on the soft moss.

A minute or so later, I felt something hard and rough poke my face. I opened my eyes to see a glowing blue biscuit.

“The fuck…?” I mumbled.

I looked off the side of the branch to see Rarity looking up at me, her horn glowing. I took the biscuit and took a nibble, it was vanilla flavoured. As I began to chew it, it tasted like marshmallows; I swallowed and instantly got a taste of rich chocolate.

It was a Threezie…

I looked over the branch to thank Rarity, to find she had already gone…

Chapter Sixteen: The Pursuit

Author's Note

I published this on the 9th of January, which just so happens to be my birthday!

Oh yeeaah! It's mah birth'day!
Gonna drink bacardi like it's mah birth'day!
(You need to imagine me singing that like a black rapper for it to be mildly amusing...)

Chapter Sixteen - Rio Grande

“Good morning!” Rarity sang up to us from the ground below.

I opened my eyes and looked about, Rainbow Dash was curled up further away on the large branch, the rope had kept me nicely in place, which I was thankful for.

“Come on sleepy heads! Time to get up!” Rarity called again.

“Just getting up now!” I called back.

“Spi… Spitfire…” Dash moaned in her sleep.

I thought I’d get some payback for the scare she gave me last night, and put my mouth to her ear.

“HAH! TIME FOR A TEA PARTY!” I yelled in a high pitched, fabulous tone.

She screamed in shock and had a small fit, before falling off the branch, she caught herself in mid-air and flew back up.

“Surprise mutha fucka!” I said in a deep voice, laughing loudly to myself.

“You dickhead!” She yelled and flew at me, ramming into me.

I rolled sideways off the branch, and was left hanging upside down by the rope.

“I heard that Rainbow Dash!” Rarity shouted, and then looked up to see me.

“Hi Rarity!” I called in a playful voice.

“What are you doing!? You could fall!” She yelped.

“I was kinda pushed!” I replied.

“Stop messing around up there!” She shouted angrily.

“Yes dear!” I laughed.

I climbed back up the rope and onto the top side of the branch, to see Rainbow Dash sitting there, glaring at me.

“Hey.” I said with a grin.

“Dick.”

“Love you too.” I chuckled.

“Shut up, you ruined a good dream.” She moaned.

“What? A make-out session with the leader of the Wonderbolts?” I teased.

Rainbow Dash went bright red, and dived off the branch and glided to the ground without saying a word.

{Nice guess work…} I thought to myself.

I untied the rope and coiled it up, before putting it back into my bag, I then put the bag onto my back and grabbed hold of the large ivy stem that I had climbed up the night before. I then proceeded to lower myself down the tree; the extra weight of the bag on my back made it a little harder to keep a good grip, the pulling sensation on my shoulders made each new handhold just that little bit harder to hold on to. Nonetheless, I was able to climb down the tree without any unfortunate falls to an untimely death.

“Sleep well?” Rarity asked, who was waiting for me at the bottom.

“Like a log, no pun intended.” I chortled.

Rarity burst into the strangest laugh I’d ever heard, it sounded like she had been tasered, she then looked at me, embarrassed by the laugh. We said nothing, as we both roared with laughter together.

“You really are quite the joker Callum…” Rarity sighed, wiping a tear away.

“Rarity, I think your laugh was a lot funnier than the joke.” I replied, still chuckling.

We both calmed down and headed to the tent to see the others.

As we approached the group it was clear that everypony was good to go, the tent had been packed up and everyone had their saddlebags on.

“Here.” Applejack called to me as she tossed me an apple.

I caught it and took a bite.

“Mmn Granny Smith apples, my favourite!” I munched.

“Yeah, you love the taste of Granny Smi-”

“Stop there, before you get hurt.” Applejack interrupted before Dash could finish.

{Vivid imagination! Stooooop!} I thought to myself, cringing.

“Moving on swiftly!” Rarity exclaimed.

“Indeed.” I replied.

“I noticed a large body of water on the other side of the airport, indicating that we’re on an island of some sort, we need to find a crossing point.” Twilight told us.

Rainbow Dash smirked and flexed her wings, then looked around at all of us, groaned, and folded them in again, knowing she couldn’t fly and had to walk with the rest of us.

“Let’s get moving now, and out of this jungle, so we can get a good look at the water to find a cross point.” I said to the group.

“You’re not in charge, you don’t give the orders.” Twilight hissed.

“Are you going to say that every time I instruct the group to do something? Because it’s really boring Twilight. As your guide, I know what to do, and where to go; so for once in your life, just shut it.” I retorted.

“Don’t speak to me in that way!” She growled.

“Then don’t speak to me in that way either.” I spat back.

“You’re on thin ice human…” She hissed to me.

“As are you… Pony…” I replied darkly.

I turned around and cleared my throat, Twilight said nothing further.

“Right, are we off then?” I quizzed to the group.

The others all nodded and hummed, Applejack stretched her hind leg and winced in pain from the barb wire wound in her hoof.

“Need me to take your bag again?” I asked her.

“That’d be much appreciated sugar cube.” She replied with a warm smile.

I took her bag and slung it over my shoulder.

“Right, let’s go.” I ordered.

We headed through the jungle in the direction we came from, and soon came to the edge of the treeline, a small way away I noticed an aeroplane coming in to land at the airport.

“Right, we need to avoid the airport and get closer to the water, so let’s head south from here.” I suggested.

“Good thinking.” Rarity agreed.

We continued south, staying just within the jungle’s treeline to stay hidden, we didn’t need to go far before we came to the end, only to find an open runway, far beyond that was the shoreline, hidden behind some buildings and another small patch of wood.

“Crap, we need to get across that area undetected…” I groaned.

“Enough of plans dude, just sprint.” Dash huffed in boredom and stretched her wings.

“On three legs? You’ve gotta be kidding me!” Applejack grunted.

“Iron Pony my ass…” Rainbow hissed to Applejack.

“Oh yeah? We’ll see about that…” She growled back.

“You know, after all this sneaking and stuff, I could use a good run.” I said in agreement with Dash.

“Why not? We won’t be here long.” Rarity agreed.

“Fun run! Woo!” Pinkie squealed.

“Fuck a countdown! Let’s go!” Dash cheered, shooting into the air and zipping across the airstrip.

“Why am I friends with her…?” Rarity sighed.

“Because she’s awesome!” I howled, sprinting after her.

I ran and ran after Dashie and didn’t look back. I needed to stretch my legs, and boy it felt good. I felt like a young Forest Gump, I could just keep running and running…

I got to the other side and into the treeline of the next little patch of forest; I looked behind me to find the others desperately trying to catch up with me, they didn’t get to the woodland for another good twenty seconds.

“You’re… You’re faster than I thought…” Applejack panted.

“Don’t sweat it, you’re on three legs.” I replied, squatting down to catch my breath.

“You’re on two.” Rarity pointed out.

“True…” I hummed, smirking.

We all re-grouped and headed through the woodland to get to the other side, and didn’t stop walking until we reached water, and much to our delight, there was a road bridge to the mainland of Brazil, I looked at my compass to find it was heading exactly where we needed, west.

“We’re going to have to go under that bridge to conceal ourselves.” I said to Twilight.

“How can we travel under a bridge? Moron.” She spat.

“There’s probably a walkway under the bridge, there normally is.” I replied calmly, not rising to her insult.

“If you know there’s a walkway, why not say that first? Why make things difficult? Hm?” Twilight questioned, as hostile as ever.

“Just in case you didn’t think of it first, I know how slow you can be.” I teased.

“How… Dare…”

“I’m joking Sparkler, we all know you’ve got the biggest head- I mean uh, brain, here.” I chuckled.

Twilight bit the middle of her lip in anger and took a very shaky breath; I decided that was enough teasing for now.

“How are we going to get over there undetected?” Rarity asked, coming up behind us.

“I guess we just stay in a tight packed group and head along the shoreline.” I suggested.

“Good plan.” She replied.

“Right, let’s get a move on then, no need for waiting around.” Applejack said firmly, walking unsteadily on her three legs.

We set off once more, and decided to pick up the pace, for minutes on end we kept walking without any need to stop.

We got to the bridge after a good ten minute walk with no problems; the bridge was about ten feet above us; just as I had predicted, there was a walkway underneath.

“Bingo!” I cheered.

“Sshh!” Twilight hissed.

“Oh calm your tits, nobody’s going to hear us.” I chuckled.

“You don’t know that.” She grunted.

“Oh shut your trap and get up on the walkway.” I said gruffly.

“Make me…” Twi growled.

“Do you want to go there?” I said, growling even deeper as I squatted next to her ear.

Twilight said nothing and trotted uphill to the bridge with haste; I found that as much as I hated threatening her, it was necessary to get her arse in gear, as she simply refused any order I gave her when she felt confident enough to challenge me. I had to keep her in her place.

The others caught up and headed uphill with us, and we got to the walkway underneath.

“What if someone shows up ahead and sees us?” Rarity asked.

“Not sure…” I replied.

“We make sure he’s dealt with.” Twilight grumbled.

“I beg your pardon?” Rarity gasped.

“We want no witnesses.” Twilight replied.

“Have you heard yourself…?” Rainbow Dash said in disbelief.

Twilight merely hummed.

“You’re seriously talking like that, you genuinely meant that. When you say to ‘deal’ with witnesses, you mean to kill them; what’s happened to you Twilight?” Rarity asked, completely taken aback.

“I ensure on completing this mission quickly, with no faults; I cannot take lives into account. I’m growing up Rarity, I’ve matured, every now and then, some lives need to end, sometimes someone dies, and sometimes, it’s necessary.” Twilight replied, a lot calmer than I had expected.

I was completely taken aback. Twilight was very different from anything I could have expected, she was talking like a ruler there. What she just said was actually quite relevant; as dark as it seemed, I was actually on her side here.

“That’s… That’s horri-”

“That’s a very good point, regardless of the darkness behind it.” I butted in from Rarity.

“Then it’s settled.” Twilight said.

“I’m not having any of you fight, if there’s a witness, I deal with them.” I instructed.

“You... You can’t be agreeing with her… That's... That’s barbaric.” Rarity stuttered.

“As Twilight said, it’s necessary.” I replied, letting out a sigh.

“I want no involvement.”

“Then don’t watch.” I muttered.

“Enough talk, let’s just move and reduce the chance of a witness in the first place.” Dashie groaned.

We all agreed and headed across the underpass.

We were about halfway across when we found exactly what we were dreading, a man was walking our way from the other side. He looked skinny and frail, even from the distance we were at, I could tell he was a small man.

“What do we do?” I asked Twi.

“What we planned, deal with him.”

“How though? Do you honestly want me to kill him? Or just knock him out?” I asked again.

“I want to take no chances; do what you have to.” Twilight responded.

{You’re taking this to a level it doesn’t need to go to…} I thought to myself.

“Twilight are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“As you command, group leader.” I replied with a sigh.

I didn’t want to kill, not yet. The clone of myself was bad enough, but I had to obey Twilight in order to get more of her trust, and for her to witness my strength so she wouldn’t challenge me as much, so I guess I didn’t have a choice.

As the man got closer, he looked towards us and saw the six behind me; he slowed down and squinted, trying to get a better look. I walked right up to him, and much to my luck, he took no notice of me, transfixed on the ponies. I took one look at them and nodded, Fluttershy and Rarity looked away, Applejack also turned Pinkie away so she couldn’t see.

“Like with Graham, this is nothing personal…” I mumbled quietly, before I made my move.

I gave him a full powered uppercut to the jaw, the poor fucker had no idea what was coming and I saw his whole head jolt backwards. I took no hesitation as I pushed him to the rail of the walkway and hit him in the face a few more times, before bending his back over the rail, he cried out in pain before I silenced him by elbowing him in the gut as hard as possible. I finished him off by flipping his legs over the rail; he fell to the ocean below, flailing around in the air like a fish out of water.
He hit the water and didn’t resurface; he was dead, without a doubt.

I looked down at the water for what felt like hours; my forehead began to sweat, and much like when I had to kill my clone, I felt my stomach wrench from the gruesome feeling within.
It felt as though there was no oxygen in the air, and I began taking deep, shaky breaths.
Everything went numb and cold for a while, as though I'd died myself...

“Are you ok?” Dash asked, walking next to me.

I shook my head to regain my senses and I looked to the blue mare.

“I’m fine.” I answered hoarsely.

“Bullshit.” She muttered.

I took a deep breath. I had just killed someone, like, properly. I’d killed my clone before, but I just killed another person, I had ended an actual life… I felt nauseous, sick… So unbelievably sick…

{Get a grip Callum...} I thought.

“Let’s move, quickly.” I ordered.

I didn’t need to say it twice, Twilight took one look at me before she trotted ahead, the others did the same, Rainbow Dash stayed by my side.

“What’s it like?” Dash asked.

I remained silent.

“Dude?”

“Rainbow Dash please just shut the fuck up.” I choked up.

“Got it.” She nodded.

I took a very deep breath and wiped the sweat from my brow, it was over and done with; this mission was my purpose, I couldn’t let killing be a problem for me, I just had to accept I’m killer now, and move on…
And then, as if my mind had been warped, I felt a fresh wave of coolness run through my body. Similar to getting a tingle up my spine, but it felt pleasant; the feeling of horror and dread left me, and it was replaced with calmness, a feeling of relaxation and understanding.

I felt alive…

“Callum, are you sure you’re alright?” Applejack asked, prodding me with a hoof.

I cleared my mind of all thoughts and gave myself a little shake.

“Yeah, I just… I just needed a moment; let’s get going.” I replied.

We kept moving across the walkway, I tried my best to push all my emotions aside, as they were all currently going crazy. Luckily there were no more people, and we got to the other side with no more problems. When we got to the end we found the walkway came out to more woodland, the odds appeared to be in our favour for now.

“Before your map closed down, I noticed that we’re headed towards a very urban area, what do we do about that?” Rarity asked.

“Stick to the shadows and alleyways if we can; I’ll scout ahead and make gestures on if it’s safe or not.” I answered.

“Sounds like a pretty good plan, unless the egghead has any complaints.” Dash said.

Like robots, we all turned our heads in sync to face Twilight; who looked from face to face. She took a good long look at me, before facing the group as a whole.

“What he said.”

I smirked, I had a feeling Twilight wasn’t going to object to me for a while after what she had just seen…
We headed off the walkway and into the jungle, still moving at a brisk pace, we didn’t stop and simply continued to walk south-west through the jungle.

Without running into problems, we reached the other end of the woodland, to find a large road, on the other side was the urban area Rarity mentioned, a side road turned into the entrance to a rundown town. The place was absolutely filthy, litter blew around the street and graffiti was sprayed all over the walls, the only thing that looked like it was contributing to the economy was a motorbike dealer on the corner of the road.

“What a disgusting place to live.” Rarity groaned.

“Well we’re not living here, so let’s just get through as quickly as possible.” I replied.

She nodded and we took a step forward when I noticed a CCTV camera atop one of the buildings.

“Hang on, we need to find a way around that.” I said, pointing to the camera.

It was then when we heard a sound I knew only too well, a gunshot.

“What was that?” Twilight yelped.

“Get down.” I replied firmly.

We all lay down and waited, and a few seconds later we heard an engine revving; not long after that we saw a van come into sight and a few motorbikes, I could clearly see the riders were armed.

“What are those things?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Sshh!” I growled.

The van stopped and the bikers around it also came to a halt, the riders dismounted as the van’s back doors opened, more men climbed out of the back, four of them. They too, were armed with rifles, they took shots into the air and a woman screamed. In seconds everyone had run away into their homes, one of the men looked around before walking to motorbike dealer’s stand; he was clearly the leader of this gang, he was tall and thin, he wore camo trousers and two gun belts across his topless body, a large black skull was tattooed on his chest. Whoever this guy was, he meant business.

“Who is that guy?” Rainbow Dash asked again.

“Shut up Rainbow…” I hissed.

The man pointed at the bikes, and the other men walked ahead and started cutting through the ropes binding them together. The stand owner walked out and started shouting at the men, and without any warning, the leader pulled a pistol out of the holster on his leg and shot the owner in the knees, he fell to the ground, screaming in agony.

“Holy sh-”

I interrupted Rainbow Dash by grabbing her muzzle and holding it shut.

“Shut up unless you want to end up like him.” I said.

She nodded, and I let go of her muzzle. There was another gunshot and I looked back to see the bike owner had be put out of his misery; the leader then took a few shots the CCTV camera, and hit it on his third shot.

“We need to move while everyone’s hiding.” I instructed.

“Are you crazy?” Applejack gasped.

“Rarity, use a diversion spell to make a sound behind them, while they’re investigating it, we move into the alleyway.” I ordered.

“What sound?”

“Replicate the gunshot and loop it, really loud bangs, it’ll buy us more time.”

“Good idea.”

“Hehe… Loud bangs…” Rainbow Dash snickered, to which I glared at her, she quickly nodded and stopped.

“Girls, get ready to move, but move quietly.” I said to the group.

They all nodded and we shuffled forward to the edge of the road. Rarity’s horn lit up, and the sound of machine gun fire sounded off behind the gang, they all dived into cover and randomly started shooting in the direction of the sound, a few house windows were shattered and people inside the houses screamed; the gang then ran ahead to investigate, while the leader went inside the small store where the bike owner lived to take anything inside.

“Go, now.” I ordered.

We all ran as fast as we could without making a sound towards the van, we ran alongside the left side and stopped to hide and look for the next place to run to, I quickly went around and looked into the back of the van to find a few assault rifles, SMGs, and magazines lying on the floor.

“Fuck it, I might need this.” I said to myself, leaning in and grabbing the closest rifle and a few magazines.

“What is wrong with you, put that down.” Twilight hissed with fury as I came back around the van.

“It’s for emergencies.” I replied.

Before she could reply, there was the sound of breaking glass inside the bike dealer’s shop, I looked ahead of the van to see the gang were still searching for the origin of the Rarity’s decoy, we didn’t have much time left until they came back. Looking along the street from us, I noticed an alleyway.

“In that alley, go.” I ordered.

We all ran into the alleyway, I took one last look back to ensure we hadn’t been seen.

We kept going down the alley until we reached the end, where we stopped for a breather.

“Who were those guys?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“I don’t know, some form of gang, whoever they are, they’re not friendly.” I replied.

“You’re telling me? They just killed someone back there!”

Fluttershy whimpered and crouched down, I then gave my rifle a look. It was a Galil, a big one too, full black; I looked on the side of the gun to see the issue; it was a Seven point Sixty Two Millimetre make. These guys weren’t just hooligans with guns, they had some decent kit.

“These people are dangerous, we need to move quickly and get some distance from them.” I said.

“Then let’s go already.” Twilight snapped.

I nodded and took point; I looked around the corner to see an empty road, an alleyway on the other side. I looked back to the six, pointed to the alley, and nodded. I then sprinted to the other side with the others just behind me.

“You all ok?” I asked when we got there and stopped.

They all nodded, and we moved to the next alley, repeating the same pattern for each empty road.

“Where to now?” Rainbow Dash asked as we came to a dead end in one of the alleys.

I looked around, and found a wooden door beside us.

“No, don’t, there could be people inside.” Rarity said.

“I go in first, I make sure it’s safe, then we move.” I snapped back.

She nodded and the six stood back as I tried the door, as predicted, it was locked. I took a step back, and then kicked the door in with all my might, and the door burst open on first try, I rushed in and pointed my gun around to find a middle aged man and a woman, woman screamed and the man instantly stood in front of her, ready to give his life to protect her; I instantly gathered they were partners.

“Por favor! Por favor!” He cried, putting his hands up, trembling like an earthquake.

“GET UPSTAIRS! NOW!” I boomed, gesturing to the staircase with my gun.

The man quickly pulled his wife to the side and told her to go up the stairs; she scrambled to the stairs on her hands and knees, sobbing loudly.

“GO ON! UP THE STAIRS! GO!” I roared at the top of my lungs, pointing my rifle at the man.

The man crouched down and ran as fast as he could and got to the stairs, and sprinted to the top with his lady by his side.

“GO ON! GO!” I yelled, chasing them half way up the stairs until they went around the corner.

I heard a door upstairs slam, and I knew my job was done. I came back down the stairs to find Rainbow Dash had poked her head in the doorway.

“It’s safe.” I said dryly.

She entered the room and the others joined her, they gathered around me, their eyes full of fear.

“You scare me when you shout…” Rarity mumbled.

“I know, and I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to be like that if we’re going to succeed in this mission.” I replied, taking a deep breath in.

“Where now?” Applejack asked.

I looked out the front door and found the road had people dotted here and there, and on the other side was the next alleyway we needed to get to.

“Across that road.” I answered.

“How do we get across?” Rainbow Dash quizzed, putting a hoof behind her neck to scratch an itch.

I took a moment to think, when I looked back at when the gang arrived earlier, and an idea popped into my head…

“When I shout ‘go, go, go’ I want you all to sprint to that alley as fast as you can.” I instructed.

“What are you going to do?” Twilight demanded.

“Clear the street…” I replied, opening the front door.

I stepped out and took a few paces into the road, before I performed the most daring thing I’d ever done in my life…

“EVERYBODY MOVE!” I yelled, raising my rifle in the air, I then pulled the trigger.

All hell broke loose, everyone started screaming and running around frantically as my rifle fired into the air, the recoil almost took the gun right out of my hands, I tightened my grip and continued firing until the magazine ran out. I let go of the trigger, put a new magazine in, and started pointing the rifle it at random people.

“GO ON! GET LOST! MOVE!” I growled, gesturing with the gun for people to run away.

And they all did just that, after no more than ten seconds the only visible people were the ones running far away down the road.

“Go! Go! Go!” I shouted and took another shot into the air.

The six emerged from the building and sprinted across the road and into the alley, not hesitating for a second.

“Now that’s what I call crowd control!” I laughed loudly.

I then heard the sound of multiple engines coming towards me, so I edged closer to the alley. To my absolute horror, numerous motor bikes came into vision, before the gang leader’s van too, came into sight; the bikers looked at me and revved their engines, before aiming their guns towards me.

“FUCK!” I shrieked and sprinted into the alley.

I heard gunshots behind me and then the sound of the bullets hitting the brick wall behind me; my heart skipped a beat as I came into the true realisation that people had just shot at me.

“What was that?” Dash asked, full of excitement.

“We’ve been spotted! Run for it!” I shouted, whizzing past all six ponies.

“WHAT!?” Twilight screeched.

“RUN! FUCKING RUN!” I screamed at her.

With no further instruction, the six sprinted after me as I charged down the alleyway as fast as my legs could carry me, once again there was a dead end, and I smashed through the door at the end and a woman inside squealed in fear.

“Oh shut the fuck up!” I growled at her as I ran through the house and out the front door into the next abandoned road.

I heard her scream again as the ponies entered the room and followed me, I kept running down the road until I found another alley. Just before I entered, I heard more gunshots and the woman’s scream being silenced; the gang were after us…

“What have you done!?” Twilight shouted at me, panting furiously.

“Don’t talk, just run!” I shouted back, passing through the alleyway until we found a turning point.

Behind me was a gun shot, and then the sound of a bullet impacting on the wall right behind me, I looked to see a massive break in the brick, I looked back for a split second to see the gang right on my tail.

“Holy fuck…” I said shakily as I dived into the next alley.

We came to a dead end, and no doors.

“No… No no no no no NO!!!” Twilight screamed in fear.

I looked at the ground to find a manhole, without saying a word I bent down and lifted the cover off.

“Down there! Now!” I shouted.

The ponies clambered down one by one, I knelt on one knee and faced where we had come; a man came around the corner and started running at me, I did what every instinct in my body was telling me to do, and I pulled the trigger.
The man ahead fell to the ground, dead instantly. More men came around the corner and I opened fire on them, two of the men screamed in pain and fell to the ground, a few of them were able to get back behind the wall. It was then when the most terrifying moment of my life occurred, they started firing back.
A bullet whizzed past me and hit the wall behind, Applejack screamed in sheer terror as another bullet smacked into the brick right beside her head. She ducked down and clambered into the manhole after Rainbow Dash, it was just Rarity and Twilight left to go.

I popped more shots back at the attackers, causing them to go back behind cover; one of them put his head back around and I took a shot, his head jolted back as blood and brain matter splattered over his gang mates, my first real headshot.

I took a few more shots before the rifle started to click. The magazine was empty, I didn’t have the time to reload; I turned around and pushed Twilight down the manhole, who landed on Rarity, I then slid down the ladder and helped them up.

“What did you do that for!?” Twilight screeched at me.

“Much like you, I don’t want to DIE!” I boomed back at her.

The sound of footsteps above showed the gang had no signs of giving up the chase.

“You killed some of them didn’t you?” Rarity asked.

“Run.” I ordered.

She nodded and ran along with the others; I ran ahead to look for an exit, ahead was a barred metal gate, and beyond that was a large pipeline, which meant there was a sewer network not far off.

“Keep going and don’t stop!” I shouted to the group as I opened the door and let the ponies through.

As I was closing the gate behind me, I heard the echo of men shouting, they were in the network with us.

I took out the empty magazine and reloaded the rifle, the charging handle pinging loudly as I pulled it back and then let it go; I ran after the six, who were some distance ahead now. Behind me was the sound of more gunfire and another bullet whizzed past my head.
The fear and adrenaline coursing through my body was like nothing I’d ever felt before, I sprinted at my maximum and caught up with the ponies in seconds. Applejack was clearly as scared as I was; she was running on all four legs again, the barb wound was numb to her as true fear took over.
More gunshots sounded off and more bullets flew by, a bullet went through Applejack’s tail and the red band she wore split in half, causing her tail to flow out naturally.

{That was too close!} I thought.

Suddenly, a searing pain went through my outer left thigh as a bullet went through my leg, I screamed in pain and lost my footing, tripping over and rolling in the muck in the centre of the sewer pipe.

“Callum!” Applejack screamed.

I was able to get to my feet with the momentum of my roll and desperately ran as fast as I could with the added bullet wound, but to no avail, another bullet skimmed my right calf and caused me to slip once more.

“No!” Applejack shouted to me, slowing down.

“DO NOT STOP FOR ME! JUST RUN!” I howled at Applejack.

She nodded and sprinted after her friends; I rolled over and clutched my rifle to my chest, I took a deep breath and aimed at my attackers once more. The first man came into sight and I opened fire, he fell face first into the ground and skidded to a halt, I aimed down the iron sight and shot as many men as I could. If I was going to die now, I was going to give the six as much help as I could before I went.

My magazine ran out after I had shot around ten of them, another shot was fired at me and a bullet went directly into my left deltoid. I gasped in pain and dropped the rifle, the pain was like nothing I’d ever experienced. Even with the serious adrenaline, the pain was still almost unbearable, it felt like the bullet wounds were on fire, I blinked back my tears and I tried my best to crawl away, my lower legs were now coated with sewage, I looked down at my thigh to see the left side of my brown cargo trousers were dark red, wet with my blood.
I looked back up to see the men running past me after the others, completely ignoring me; I rolled over to watch them pursue the ponies.

“No…” I groaned, still trying to hold back the tears from the searing pain in my shoulder and leg.

A hand grabbed my shoulder and I couldn’t help but cry out in pain and shock, I was rolled over and I looked up to see the leader of the gang. He squatted over me, looked me in the eyes, and smiled; it was a sick smile, a dark thought had run through his head, and it clearly pleasured him to think about it. He then drew his pistol from his holster, grabbed me by the throat, and then smacked me in the side of the head with the pistol. My head jolted to the side and I grunted deeply with pain, everything went fuzzy, my head began to throb and I could feel a blood trickle down the side of my head. The leader then stood up and rolled me onto my side with his foot. I tried to get up again, and he brought his gun down onto my head again, I face planted into the muck beneath me and I felt even dizzier, the pain began to grow numb as all my senses went haywire.

I made one last attempt to get up, before the gun hit the back of my head a third time, and all went black.

Chapter Seventeen: The Bogeyman

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Chapter Eighteen: I Predict a Riot

Chapter Eighteen: The Plot

“So much blood for one person!” Ingeo laughed, removing the red hot screwdriver from my leg.

I gasped and looked to the ground, squinting my eyes shut.
They had been torturing me for a good half hour, I had screamed so much that I didn’t have the energy to scream any further.

“Normally they don’t last this long before breaking. I told you this one’s a good one!” Ingeo continued to chuckle, smacking me in the face.

I had become numb to his blunt attacks, the tools used on me were much worse. My outer left arm had been turned into a literal pin cushion; stuck with about forty or so sewing needles. My thighs had been punctured multiple times by Ingeo’s screwdriver, which he had constantly kept the tip red hot with a blowtorch.

“What do you think about the gag, Vladimir? Aren't I a genius?” Ingeo roared with laughter.

The gag in question, was Ingeo's horrific idea of a joke; a BDSM ball gag which had more sewing needles hammered deep into it, preventing me from closing my mouth or else my tongue and gums met the same fate as my left arm.
Every so often he would take it out to demand answers about the ponies, and would shortly after force it back in.
I was in absolute agony, there were no words to describe such pain…

“I think it’s time for the drill, no?” Ingeo rhetorically asked, grinning.

Looking up to face Ingeo with blurred vision, the foggy image of Vladimir beside him was already fitting a thin drill bit into the handheld utensil; and although it was no bigger than a pencil, it was going to damn-well hurt. I shook my head from side to side, flicking saliva and blood as I did so.

“You don’t want the drill?”

“N-no, no, no…” I stuttered pathetically.

To this, he tutted and shook his head in disappointment, before grabbing my shoulder and pushing me back in the chair, resting a thumb on one of the needles in my arm.

“Then tell me about the fucking horses! What are they? Where do they come from?” He hissed.

I couldn’t break, I just couldn't!
If I told him the truth, he would simply dispatch me, and then keep the ponies for himself, or perhaps sell them; heck, maybe even kill them just for the fun it of it! This man was an utter lunatic, there was no telling what he'd do, but I knew for a fact that the only way to stay alive was to retain all and any information he desired about the ponies.

“Then it’s time for the drill!” He sang merrily.

With tears streaming down my cheeks, I watched Ingeo take the drill from Vladimir; he revved it up a few times before looking at me with a sick smile. He then did a slow and ridiculous dance with the tool, turning around and around as he edged towards me. He finally stopped as he approached me.

“Where to drill… Where to drill…” He quizzed to himself.

He brought the drill to my right eye and pulled the trigger; I kept my eyes wide open and stared at the spinning drill bit, weeping uncontrollably and yet completely frozen in sheer terror. He eventually brought the tool back, before lowering the drill to my left hand, where he left it for a moment, letting the weight of the drill lie on back of my hand.

Without warning Ingeo pulled the trigger of the drill and pressed down, I instantly felt the excruciating pain as the twisting cylinder went further and further into my hand until it went all the way through and into the arm of the chair, the pain was like nothing before, I could physically feel my flesh being blended by the drill bit as it whizzed around inside my hand. I screamed louder than before, I screamed and screamed, the pain was unbearable, I couldn’t see anymore as my brain was unable to process anything other than the searing agony in my hand.

“Scream boy! Go on! Scream!” Ingeo squealed with amusement.

And scream I did…
I didn’t stop, unable to control myself as the pain grew worse and worse…
Eventually Ingeo pulled back out and released the trigger, my screams died down and I coughed savagely, before regaining my distorted vision. Gritting my teeth and looking at the drill, I almost became transfixed on my own dark glistening blood dripping from the bit; I then looked down to my hand to see the small hole near the centre of my hand just between my ring finger and middle finger, with blood flowing out with each pulse of my racing heart.

“Want to tell me now?” Ingeo teased.

In my pain, I didn’t hear him, and so he repeated himself, putting his nose near mine.

“You want to tell me now? Hm?”

I spat a mouthful of blood at him, which hit him directly in the face; let down by the lack of control, he angrily threw the drill across the room and then punched me in the gut, winding me and almost making me sick.
He wiped his face and turned to Vladimir while I swayed from side to side, I had lost nearly all my energy now and would have fallen out of the chair long ago if not for being chained to it.

"Uh oh, someone's looking a little sleepy!" Ingeo sang.

Grunting to his boss, Vladimir pointed to something on the ground, but my vision was too blurred to identify it; soon enough the item in question was revealed as Ingeo eagerly picked up the car battery and placed it on the table beside me.

“I wonder… Will you be a screamer? Or a buzzer?” Ingeo asked, more to himself than to me.

{This can't be happening... This isn't real... This isn't real...} I thought to myself.

Vladimir hoisted a bucket of water beside me and removed a large dripping rag from it, and before I could process what was going on, he had draped it over my face and obscuring my vision; I hadn't the energy to shake the rag off, and simply awaited my fate. There was no escape from this, and there was no use denying that, all I could do was endure and hope that I either survived, or died very quickly.

Ingeo said nothing as he grabbed the crocodile clips attached to the battery and slammed them into either side of my head; the current struck instantly, the waves of electricity shot through my body and my muscles went into uncontrollable spasm, it was like getting extreme cramp in each individual muscle in my body, but worse. As I lost all control of mind and body, I scream out in agonising pain, this was worse than anything I could have imagined.

“He’s a buzzer and a screamer!” Ingeo howled with laughter.

My screams were freakish and rippled, to some degree they were even unhuman as I jolted and thrashed savagely in all possible directions; if literally felt as though every muscle in my body were being turned inside out.

“Look at you go! Look at you go! Like a ragdoll in a tumble dryer!" Ingeo squealed, laughing maniacally.

And then, all of a sudden, my body stopped moving; I slumped back into the chair and went completely limp. The pain didn't stop though, it continued to burn through every strand of muscle fibre I had.
Panting, shaking, and silently sobbing, I sat there completely exhausted; but I had survived.
This bastard was not going to kill me, I didn't give up my entire life just to die at the hands of a madman; there was too much at stake to give in, the girls needed me, Equestria needed, all of Equus needed me!
This fact, and responsibility, pushed me forward and kept me within the realm of the living, I looked up to Ingeo with a glimmer in my eye, and used the last microscopic levels of my energy to speak three single words to him.

"I.... *pant*... Ain't.... *pant*... Bovvered...."

Ingeo's face dropped, his victory stolen from him; his mouth shifted into a disgruntled sneer as he snapped his fingers together, ordering Vladimir to take me back to Captive Corner.
I had won.
My thought processes began to cease as I was unbound from the chair; I dropped to the floor and barely even registered the pain as a few needles were knocked further into my left arm, my brain began to lose control, focus, power, and consciousness altogether.
Vladimir grabbed my by me ankles and dragged me out of the room, and the only thing I could perceive was the soul crushing cries from the girls as they finally witnessed me after being forced to listen to my torture; Rarity let out a shriek of despair that echoed throughout the room, and it would be her shriek that became the last thing I heard that day, and for many days to follow...

“Well fuck me sideways and call me Princess, you aren’t in a coma.” Spoke a female voice.

I recognised the voice of Nicole and slowly opened my eyes, she was sitting cross legged by my side, Jamie and William were also sat beside me, eager to greet me.

“The boy lives! The boy lives!" Jamie exclaimed, clapping.

“When Vladimir dragged you back in here, we all thought you were dead.” William told me.

“Mmn... Not yet…” I croaked.

“I did my best to patch you up, but I’m afraid your hand’s a little bit... Well... Dead.” Nicole told me.

I tensed my muscles to find they were stiff as a oak, no doubt I’d been unconscious for at least a day or two; I growled in pain upon sitting up (with William’s help), and looked down at my hand; there was cloth covering the hole, but I could still feel it, I tried to clench my hand into a fist to find my ring finger and pinkie finger didn’t respond at all.

“I sincerely hope you don't have a girlfriend back home, because those fingers are buggered.” Nicole explained.

“Firstly, no I don't have a girlfriend… Secondly, fuck.” I grumbled.

“On the bright side, the hole's not gone through any bones, so it’ll heal up eventually.” She continued.

{Well at least there’s some good news, my hand’s not permanently crippled…} I thought to myself optimistically.

“Your pin cushion of an arm will be alright, despite the fact it looks like you intimately fisted a hornet's nest. The legs are pretty nasty but you'll still walk. All in all, you'll live."

“Glad to hear it... How long was I out?” I murmured.

“Five days.”

“Holy shit, that's too long…”

“Too long? Bitch you need to thank your lucky stars you're not dead!" Nicole laughed.

Five days...
The girls had been left alone at the mercy of that madman, for five days!
Shaking my head, I tried to stand, only for my weak legs to give way and force me back to a sitting position.

"No, you don't understand, that is way too long, I need to get out of here!" I protested.

“I’ve told you already, it’s impossible.” She replied.

“What about Keira and Leala?”

“They were slave girls, they get to leave the Corner to cook in the kitchens, making it way easier for them to get out, but god forbid they get caught... Look, if you want to get out, you need to get through those armed guards. Oh, and do I even need to mention Vladimir?”

I hung my head in frustration; Nicole had a point, but regardless, I was going to find a way out, with or without her help. Ingeo’s torture hadn’t broken me, it had only left me more desperate than ever before.

“Changing the subject, who’s hungry?” Nicole asked around.

“Magnum?” William asked in his childish voice.

“No Magnum.” Nicole replied.

“Magnum.”

“No.”

“Magnum!”

Nicole ignored Will and got up and headed to the chain-link fence, where she told the guards that it was meal time; they let her out of the fence and an armed guard escorted her out of the warehouse.

{There’s my way out…} I thought to myself.

From there, I sat with William and Jamie, formulating our plot to escape…

A few days had passed, and our plan was ready.
I had recovered most my strength after tirelessly rehabilitating my damages, and what strength hadn't returned I made up for in spirit and determination.

"So, are you sure you know what to do?” I asked to another one of the captives, named Conor Nelson.

“Yeah, just pretend to go apeshit on you, right?” He answered.

“Pretty much, but be sure it's WWE style, fake and attention-seeking.” I replied.

“Got it.”

Conor was a body builder, not much older than me, he had turned eighteen only a few days before he was captured by Ingeo’s men during a raid, he was born in Indonesia, but moved to England at a very young age. He was broad like me, and perfect for my plan.

“Nicole, did you get it?” I asked, turning to look at Nicole.

“Course I fucking did.” She replied with a smug grin, handing me a kitchen knife.

“Nice job!” I praised.

I looked to another one of the slave girls I’d befriended, called Alisha.

“Did you find the stuff?” I asked.

“I did, it’s just outside the drug room in a large blue box.” She replied.

“Excellent, thank you Alisha.” I praised.

Nicole gave me a stern look and raised an eyebrow.

“Are you ready for this? There’s no going back, so if you're getting second thoughts...”

“I’m ready.”

“Scared?”

I shook my head and the left side of my upper lip raised into a snarl.

“I’m not scared… I’m angry…”

Casting my gaze over to Finn, I gave the gentle giant a nod. He stood up and emitted a loud yawn, which all the captives knew to be the signal; this was an inter-captive plan, we were all going to get out of here together, or die trying.

“Callum!” Conor yelled.

“What?” I asked innocently.

“You took my fucking lunch!” He boomed, pushing other captives out of the way to get to me.

“Bullshit, I did not.” I shrugged off the accusation.

Conor ignored me and charged at me, I tensed my muscles and braced for impact. Conor leant forward and grabbed me with both hands and pushed me back, almost lifting me into the air. I spun around and shook him off, causing him to collide with William.

“Maagnuuum!” He wailed, being pushed over completely.

The body builder got up and ran at me, ready to throw a punch. I dodged and put my arm under his belly and used his own momentum to launch him into a wooden shelf, breaking it apart.
By now, all of the captives were in a tight ring around us, giving us space to fight. Conor got up and ran at me, throwing another punch to my chest, I took the hit and grunted, knocked back by the blow; Conor’s punches weren’t skilful or coordinated, but they were certainly damn strong.

“Hey, what's going on in there!?” A guard shouted.

“Fight!” A captive called back.

Two of the guards unlocked the fence and pulled out their makeshift batons, hitting and pushing past other captives in order to clear a path towards us, trying to separate our staged fight.

“Stop now!” One of them shouted.

Connor and I stopped immediately, and gave one another a high five (another signal, cheesy as it were). Finn strode behind the rear guard and put him in a body lock, restraining him. As the first guard turned around in surprise, I lunged forward and withdrew the kitchen knife, driving it deep into his back whilst tackling him to the floor. He cried out in pain and I tugged at the knife, only to find it was now stuck in his back; taking his makeshift baton as a replacement, I got to my feet and left the guard on the ground, now supposedly paralysed from the waist down and clearly in shock.

"What about this one?" Finn asked, still restraining the other guard.

“Let the captives decide his fate.” I said coldly.

Finn disarmed the guard, before pushing him into the middle of the ring; there was a brief silence before Captive Corner roared in unison, rushing towards him like a group of soldier ants. The guard was swallowed up in seconds and would most likely be trampled to death.

“What’s happening in there!?” The armed guard shouted, walking into the prison with his rifle.

He waved the gun around to intimidate the captives and to put them in their place. Picking the right moment, I swung the makeshift baton into the side of his head, causing him to drop the rifle and hit the ground like a sack of spuds. Now dazed and panicked, the guard fumbled around blindly in search of his weapon, only for me to bring the baton down a second time, cracking into his skull and immobilising him for good (whether he was now dead or comatose was unknown to me, not that it mattered).
Rummaging around in his various pockets, I finally found my prize, and raised a fist into the air.

“We have the keys! Now onward! To freedom!”

The prisoners all hollered with vigour and rushed to the chain-link gate, with me leading the charge, rifle in hand. The few remaining guards by the prison withdrew their batons as to hold their ground, but they were quickly flattened into oblivion by the rampant horde of Captive Corner, now hellbent on revenge and freedom from this dreadful place.
The other guards further back quickly realised how vastly outnumbered they were, and ran for the gate. Alas, t'was I whom had the keys in possession, therefore they were trapped; I raised the rifle and shot them down without a shred of remorse. Ingeo's torture had changed me, I had felt agony beyond my own comprehension, and I now felt the urge to alleviate that pain in the form of mercilessness ferocity, to those who deserved it.
Was it right? Was it wrong? I didn't know.
In this moment, in this rush, in this chaos, I didn't fucking care.

I unlocked the gate and pushed it apart, allowing the other captives to charge ahead of me, there would no doubt be more shots fired soon and I didn't want to be at the front of the group when that happened.
Soon enough, gunfire was heard ahead, but like a singular entity, the riot pressed onward, soon swallowing the gunmen and putting their weapons into our hands; for every gun they lost, it was a gun we gained, and eventually we took control of the main compound, despite heavy losses.

Amidst the anarchy and violence, I slipped away from both sides via a window that took me into Ingeo's part of the compound, I darted from room to room to find the place isolated, Ingeo's men had either fled or rushed to defend the front door. Nearing Ingeo's torture chamber, I spotted two guards running towards me with their machetes raised. I didn’t think, my instincts took over as I took a knee and rapidly pulled the trigger, emptying the whole magazine at them; not every bullet made contact, but not every bullet needed to, for both men now lay on the ground, immobile and splattered with blood. I didn't feel a shred of remorse as I dropped the gun and strode past the bodies, taking a machete as I did so; rescuing the girls was the only thing that mattered, well, that and putting and end to Ingeo.

Pushing the door open and cautiously entering the main chamber, the sight before me almost brought me to tears; stood in their cages, clutching at one another, were six ponies. The poor things looked bedraggled and broken in spirit, and as I approached them, I picked up the faint smell of excrement.
Oh my god... They'd been trapped in the same cages, the entire time...

"Girls... Girls, it's me!" I cried out.

One by one, their lifeless expressions slowly rejuvenated as they recognised me; the poor things didn't know whether to smile or cry, although both at the same time appeared to be working for them.

“CALLUM!” Rainbow Dash screamed.

BANG!

The bullet may have only skimmed me, but the searing pain across my waist was enough to throw me off focus; I panicked and dropped to the ground instinctively. As I rolled over and tried to get up, Vladimir Kikashkov's boot flew into me, sending me cascading across the floor, now winded and vulnerable. The Russian grabbed me by the hair and pulled me up to my knees, before wrapping an arm around my neck, nearly crushing my windpipe and only just allowing me to breathe. Holding me steady, Vladimir forced me to look at Ingeo as he approached me, his pistol in hand.

“Excuse me… Do you have, any… Fucking idea… How rude that was?” He barked.

Placing the barrel of the gun directly against my forehead, Ingeo emitted a psychotic scream of anger and then pushed the gun harder into my face until it left a mark.

"You've ruined, everything! You stupid little sewer rat! Why?! Why would you not just answer my fucking questions and die!?" He roared, stamping his foot repeatedly.

Before I could answer, a phone began to ring in Ingeo's pocket, he withdrew the gun and took his phone to see who was calling, which resulted in him baring his teeth and hissing like a wild animal.

“Fucking hell, I need to take this... Vladimir, do me a favour and kill him! Slowly!" He yapped, before walking off.

Vladimir tightened his grip around my neck and I had to resist with all my strength to take in a breath of air; using his free hand, Vladimir seized my wrist and forced my right arm behind my back, very nearly popping the damn thing out of place. Meanwhile, Ingeo paced back and forth, clearly arguing with someone of a higher authority.
Who the hell could be in control of Ingeo?

“I can handle this, okay? They're being led by a fucking kid, I can take back control. No, I don't need your damn Privateers, I've literally just had a visit from Paulo and he's going to lend me some of his militia! Listen, just give me a few hours to take back control, and then we can sort out shipping goods to the Rook Islands, just give me a fucking chance Hoyt!"

Vladimir's vice-like hold grew tighter and tighter, if felt as though my head were about to pop off like a champagne cork; wheezing and gasping, I desperately tried to use my left elbow to hit the Russian in the ribs, only for him to continue twisting my right arm until I felt it beginning to slip out of its socket.

“Get off the phone and stop bitching at me when you’ve got your own problem with Snow White, by the time you get him, this will all be under control! Besides, if you cut me out, you know my cousin will back out too! You lose me, you lose Vaas!"

Ingeo continued arguing with this 'Hoyt' character, while I was on the verge of blacking out; Vladimir suddenly released me and grunted loudly, to which I lurched forward and twisted around, ready to defend myself.
But no defending was required, for Vladimir had fallen to one knee and was clutching at his own neck, where his own military knife was now embedded, encased in a light blue aura; whipping around to face the cages, I spotted Rarity stood defiantly with her horn glowing in the same blue aura.
Facing Vlad once more, I could only bare witness as the blade gashed open his neck and then floated over to me; I caught the blade and the aura disappeared, just as Vladimir's limp body collided with the hard concrete floor.

“Mother-fucker!”

I turned around to face the now-livid Ingeo, but I was too late; he brought his machete down and it sliced into my chest, blood instantly began streaming out of the wound as he lashed across my left pectoral muscle. I emitted a deep growl of pain and jumped back, trying to keep my distance from Ingeo and regain my bearings.

“Why did you have to kill Vladimir?! Why can't you just make this easy!?”

“Friendship is motherfucking magic!” I spat back, tightening my grip on Vlad's knife.

Wincing in pain, I wiped away some of the blood that was continually leaking from my chest, and rolled my shoulders in preparation for the fight.

“I'm going to spill you!” He growled.

“Not from over there you're not, bring it!"

Allured by my taunt, Ingeo made a bold lunge for me, to which I steered his machete away and sliced his outer wrist in the process; he hissed in rage and made another horizontal swipe, to which I ducked under and slipped back.

“Why won’t you die!?” He hollered, slashing wildly at me.

“Because I made a promise.” I spat in retort, making a swipe of my own.

He dodged and jabbed at me, the blade slid along my shoulder and left a shallow gash; I remained focused and instantly made a counter attack, but he was able to grab my wrist and prevent me from landing a blow. Firmly kicking him in the chest, he stumbled backwards and almost toppled over.

“I’m not starting to like you anymore, boy…” He growled.

“My name is not boy.” I hissed.

“Then who the fuck are you!?” He screamed, charging at me full pelt.

I dodged his first and most savage strike, ducked beneath his second, but his third I could not avoid, the machete glided downward in a diagonal motion directly towards my neck; I shut my eyes an a natural response and waited for the mortal sting, and yet, no such sting came. I opened my eyes to find the blade did not make contact, it had stopped about an inch from slicing into me and no doubt beheading me. That's when I realised that akin to Vladimir's knife being enveloped in a magical aura, Ingeo's machete was also emitting a faint glow, but it wasn't blue this time.
It was a hot pink... Twilight... It was Twilight's magic!
Twilight had saved my life...
Refusing to give Ingeo a fourth opportunity, I thrust Vladimir's blade deep in his sternum and gave it a firm twist, causing him to emit a deep and unnatural gasp of mixed agony and confusion.

“My name is Callum Horncastle…
I am the sworn protector to those six ponies…
And I am the last face you will ever see…”

Ripping Vlad's knife out of him, I gave him a firm push and he stumbled back a few steps and turned around, releasing the machete which clattered to the ground. He looked to the ponies and pointed at Twilight, knowing that she was truly responsible for his downfall. Turning to face me once more and dropping to his knees, Ingeo looked up at me with desperation and woe; he tried to mumble something to me, only for foamy blood to escape his lips.
Blood loss consumed him, and he crumpled down into the floor.

I had won.

For a short time, I remained emotionless, thoughtless in fact; I just stood there and stared at his body for what felt like hours, his blood continued to pool around him. Nausea slowly crept upon me as I realised that I had done this, I had spilled all this blood, I had ended all these lives.

"What... What have I become...?" I murmured, dropping the bloody knife.

“Callum! Callum, snap out of it!" Applejack called over to me.

"Get us out of here!” Rainbow Dash shouted.

I shook my head and cleared my mind, before rushing over to the cages and looking for a way to unlock them.

“The keys... They're in his back pocket...” Twilight quietly spoke.

I looked down to Ingeo and I could have sworn that his eyes moved to look at me; blocking the ever-worsening emotional distress, I rolled him over and reached into his pocket. I pulled out the keys, walked to the cages and opened them one by one; Applejack rushed forward and gave me a tight hug, not caring for the blood all over me.

“You did it Sugarcube… You did it…” She sighed.

"We did it, together." I hoarsely replied.

She let go and stood back, allowing Fluttershy to hug me as well.

“We need to get out of here…” Twilight said.

Nodding in agreement, I realised that Rainbow hadn't moved since I won the fight with Ingeo.

“Come on Rainbow.” Applejack called the blue pegasus over.

Rainbow Dash didn’t move, she lay in her cage, motionless; I went over to her cage and got inside with her.

“Rainbow Dash?”

“My… My wings…” She croaked.

“I’m sorry Dashie… I'm so sorry...”

“My wings are... Gone... I'll never fly again…” She choked up, tears welling up in her eyes.

“You don’t know that, they could heal up soon; your feathers will grow back...” I tried to assure her.

“My wings… Are ruined!” She wailed into her hooves as she began to sob.

“I know, I know… And I'm so sorry, there's nothing I can say or do to fix this... But we need to get out of here Rainbow, come on, staying here won’t make them grow back any faster." I implored.

After a pause, she shakily got up and waddled beside me as we left the cage; I made my way over to Ingeo's body and took his pistol for good measure.

“Where’s the exit? Do you know?” Applejack asked.

“Back the way I came, just follow me and keep your heads low.” I replied.

Everyone was in a truly awful way, some worse than others, but thankfully they all had the strength to follow suit and allowed me to lead them away from the room where such cursed memories would quite possible haunt us all for the rest of our days...

We headed to the main door, and I heard gunshots on the other side.

{I guess the fight’s still going on.} I thought.

“Wait here.” I ordered.

I pushed open one of the double doors of the main exit to see a few more of Ingeo’s men with their rifles, squatting behind crates, down the other end of the corridor were some captives, armed with stolen rifles of their own, upon seeing me, they ceased fire and let me take care of the enemies.

“Afternoon.” I muttered dully.

I lined up my targets and shot the guards down as quickly as possible; one of them turned around just in time to see me, but I had thankfully landed a bullet into his chest before he could react, bringing him down with the rest.

“Good shot, sir!” Nicole called from the other end of the corridor.

“Why thank you ma’am!” I called back.

“Wait there.” I said to the six, whom were still hiding behind the other door.

I made my way to Nicole and she did the same. Meeting halfway, she dived at me and hugged me tightly, causing a lot of discomfort to my plethora of injuries, both new and old; I grunted in pain and she quickly released me.

“You did it, you crazy son of a bitch, you got us out.” She said.

I gave a pained smile and shrugged my shoulders, unsure of how to properly react with so much spinning around inside my head; clearing her throat, Nicole changed the subject.

“Dude! Your chest!” Nicole exclaimed.

The deep laceration across my upper chest was still oozing blood and had completely caked my shirt in the stuff; while it wasn't serious enough to kill me, it most certainly didn't feel pleasant to say the least.

“Yeah, Ingeo and I got into a bit of a knife-fight.” I said.

“Yikes... You kill him?”

“I'm standing here now, aren't I?” I huffed in reply.

“Blimey, top job!”

“Vladimir's gone too.”

“Shut up, no way… You killed them both?”

“Well, I had a little help, but otherwise yeah."

“So, the legendary Vladimir Kikashkov was put down by a boy of sixteen."

“Heh, I suppose so.” I chuckled nervously.

After a short silence, I told Nicole that I was going to go and look for my things and that I'd catch her later, which was a lie, as I planned to escape with the six before anyone spotted them. Thankfully she took off in search of the other captives that she'd befriended over her imprisonment, allowing my to get back to the girls. I made my way back to the torture chamber's exit and stuck my head around the door to face them.

“There's still quite a few people around, so we need to move, and fast.”

“Got it.” Applejack nodded, giving Dashie a nudge.

Everypony followed suit in double file as I went through the hall and into the various parts of the compound (thankfully undetected). We shortly came across the drug stockpile which had mostly been looted, but there were still plenty of narcotics dotted around, god-knows how big this organisation had been.

“Don’t touch any of these substances.” I ordered.

“What are they?” Applejack asked.

“Drugs.” I replied.

Everypony instantly formed a tighter formation and avoided the bags, as though a slight touch would kill them.

“So I assume drugs exist in Equestria?” I asked, walking through the room.

“Yeah, they're mostly grown and imported from abroad." Twilight replied.

“Then I don't need to tell you how bad they are, don't touch 'em.”

Every one obeyed my command, all except for Pinkie Pie.

"What did I just say, Pinkie!?" I barked.

"But it looks like sugar!" She protested, prodding a bag of coke.

"It's not sugar, now leave it alone."

Sighing, she pushed it away and returned to the group as we left the room.
Exactly as foretold, just outside the stockpile room was a large blue box, which contained all of our bags and my jacket; retrieving them and tossing them to each pony, I tightened my own bag straps and sighed with relief to find my phone still in my jacket's front pocket.

“Let’s move.” I ordered, gesturing to an exit door back in the stockpile room.

I headed to the door and I pushed it open, to which we were all greeted by a beautiful sight.
The jungle.

Fresh air filled my lungs for the first time in weeks, fuelling me with energy and life; I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes in euphoria as the cooler, cleaner air flowed through me, bringing my body back to (relatively) full functionality.

“Sneaking off without a goodbye, are we?” Nicole angrily scolded.

We all froze and anxiously turned to face her in unison, we’d been caught out.
It was then when the most unexpected thing occurred, Nicole began to laugh.

“Oh Callum, calm your tits. I've been trapped in a drug cartel for months, getting high off second-hand fumes, I wouldn’t be half surprised if those My Little Ponies behind you are just hallucinations! And if they’re not, well screw it, I could do with something amazing in my life after what I've been through.” She told me.

“You also know who we are?” Pinkie asked, tilting her head on one side.

“Oh great, you can talk too. Well in that case, you’re probably real, and if you are, hello.” Nicole replied.

“Hi!” Pinkie squeaked.

“Nicole, honestly, does nothing surprise you?” I quizzed.

“Look, I’m lucky to be alive right now! So if I'm going to suddenly start partaking in supernatural events now, I might as well enjoy the ride, right?” She shrugged.

“I suppose so." I hummed.

“Well, as much as I'd like to know more, I'd much rather find my damn passport and then hitch a ride back home before I get recaptured or some shit. It was really nice meeting you though, good luck with, well, whatever it is that ones does with six cartoon ponies in the Brazilian jungle, ta-ta!”

Taking a bow, Nicole ran back into the compound and shut the door behind her.
Shaking my head in disbelief, I turned to the girls and gave an innocent chuckle.

"Well, uh, that was Nicole!"

"I see." Twilight deadpanned.

"Anyway, we need to pick up the pace and hope nobody else spots us."

“What about your wounds?” Fluttershy asked.

“They can wait, we need to get out of sight. I'll be fine.” I answered, ironically wincing as my chest opened up again.

She reluctantly nodded and we headed for the jungle without another word uttered between us.
We had done it, we had escaped Ingeo’s stronghold, toppled his entire cartel, and liberated Brazil from his grasp.

We were free…

Chapter Nineteen: Crikey!

Chapter Nineteen - Crikey!

“Jeez Fluttershy! Stop poking it! It hurts enough as it is!” I cried out in pain as Fluttershy prodded my left arm.

“I’m not educated with human biology; I need to get an estimate for the angle and everything…” Fluttershy calmly said back to me.

“I’ll do it myself if I need to, it’s just that some help would be useful.” I growled back.

My arm was still out of place and was causing me a lot of distress, Fluttershy may normally be a good nurse, but at this time and place, she was only irritating me and being completely unhelpful.

“I wouldn’t recommend that, you could put it back in wrong.” She told me.

“Possibly.” I grunted, standing up.

“Only if you’re sure you want to take the risk.” Fluttershy replied.

I rolled my eyes and raised my left bicep with my good arm; I gritted my teeth as the sharp pain shot into my shoulder.

“You could try pushing against a tree?” Applejack suggested.

“Why?” I asked.

“Well, I remember once when I dislocated my leg bucking apples, I was on my own so I had to do it myself, and I put my hoof against a tree and just pushed it back into place.” She explained.

“The more you know…” I mumbled, moving to the nearest tree.

I rested my left hand on the tree to keep it raised as I angled my body away; I then twisted my arm so it was in the correct position. I took a deep breath and pushed my body against the arm with all my might, the shoulder slotted back into place and there was a loud crunch as it did so. I growled in pain and came down to one knee, holding my shoulder completely as pain pulsated through it, a few seconds later the pain quickly faded away and I sighed in relief.

“You okay?” Applejack asked.

“Yeah, I’m alright.” I replied dully.

I shrugged and rolled my shoulder to properly realign it, rewarding me with a few satisfying crunches.

“Your hand should be usable in about a week with the Kuphila Amanzi.” Fluttershy told me.

I looked at my hand to observe the light blue cast around my hand; Fluttershy had carefully applied it so I could still use my other fingers and thumb, along with bending the wrist. Besides the fact the cast was rock solid, I pretty much forgot it was even there.
She's also worked wonders on my other numerous injuries, but had told me that the slash across my chest would leave a horrific scar.

“Brilliant, thanks Flutters.” I smiled.

“You’re welcome.” She replied.

“So, where are we now?” Rarity asked.

“I’m not sure, but those men took us a long distance before taking us into those cages, so wherever we are, it’s far away from where we were last. Human, use your technology again to locate the shard.” Twilight ordered.

Something clicked in me at that point, my happy nature faded once more as Twilight addressed me, once again calling me ‘human’. I turned to face her.

“Stop calling me that.” I told her.

“I gave you an order human.”

“Stop calling me that.” I demanded, glaring at her.

She looked at me nervously, but pushed her luck as she wanted to be the alpha in the group.

“I lead this group, I can call you anything I see fit, now use your technology and locate the shard… Human.”

I blinked, and flinched slightly, not enough for anyone to see though. I walked up to her, pulled the phone out of my pocket, and dropped it onto the ground.

“You know what? DO IT YOURSELF!” I roared in her face.

Twilight gasped and jumped back, cowering in fear. Everypony else all jumped in shock, taken aback by my sudden change in behaviour.
I stormed off away from the group and headed deeper into the jungle, I didn’t stop walking nor did I look back. A tear formed in my eye and rolled down my cheek, I wiped it away and sniffed before slumping myself against a tree and sat there motionless, thinking about everything on my mind.

I no longer found Twilight’s bitchy antics amusing; I fucking hated that pony… She ordered me to kill someone, an innocent man. I didn’t think at the time, I just, did… Killing the clone made me feel sick inside, and then when I was told to kill that man on the bridge, I didn’t know how to say ‘no’.
I initially thought it would prove myself to Twilight, that I would do as she asked without hesitation, and that she would think twice before challenging me if she saw me end life, but now it was over and done, I felt horrible…
Even after killing Ingeo and Vladimir, and the other bad people at the drug complex, I still couldn’t let go of that foul memory that lingered in my mind.
I put my hands to my head and gently rubbed my temples.

“I’m a murderer…” I mumbled to myself.

The image played over and over in my mind, of the man going over the railing and helplessly falling to his end, I had done that…

“What have I done…?” I mumbled.

How could I have been so ignorant and thoughtless, I had done something worthy of execution in most places, I was a criminal, a monster…

I put my head in my hands and began to cry quietly to myself, my building emotions finally coming out, I looked through the gaps in my fingers to see the jungle ground, blurred by the tears in my eyes, I blinked and watched the tears fall, instantly bringing my clear vision back, before it blurred once again with more tears.

I was too busy sniffing to myself to notice the sound of something approaching me, or rather, someone.

“Hey…” A soft voice said next to me.

I wasn’t startled and simply closed my eyes, taking a long sigh as my friend sat down beside me.

“Want to tell me what that was all about?” She said to me, lightly placing a hoof upon my shoulder.

I didn’t speak and continued to quietly sniff and sigh. A large tear formed in my eye, before slowly making its way down my right cheek, before it reached my chin, a soft furry wrist wiped the tear away, before I was hugged tightly.

“There, there… Come on… It’s okay…” She whispered into my ear.

“Okay? Okay…? This is not okay…” I choked up, closing my eyes.

“Come now… Talk to me… Tell me what you’re feeling…” She hushed.

I kept my eyes closed and sighed deeply before speaking.

“I’m evil…” I breathed.

“Oh come now… Whatever makes you think that?”

“I murdered an innocent man… Back on the bridge when we first came to Brazil…” I replied shakily, gasping slightly as more tears formed in my eyes.

“Oh Callum… That’s what this is about?” She asked, hugging me tighter.

“I can’t get it out of my head… I keep seeing it every time I close my eyes, happening over and over and over again! He didn’t do anything wrong! I wasn’t thinking, I didn’t stop think about it, I… I… Just… DID IT!” I stuttered before crying harder, burying my face into my friend’s shoulder.

“Sshh… Let it out…” She hushed.

“Why? Why didn’t I stop myself?” I sniffed.

There was a long pause, no reply, no answer, just a lot of deep thinking from both of us as I wept pathetically.

“You broke…” She finally answered.

She let go of me and looked at me face to face, but still kept a hoof upon my shoulder.

“You’ve been strong from the moment we met you, you left your home, you abandoned your old life, you parted from your pets, and your old dream of our world being real has come true. You’ve been put into shock from it, and then for you to end the life of your clone put you into an even deeper shock.
When we finally arrived at Brazil, and you were ordered to kill that man, you were still in shock. Your mind didn’t know how to work with an order like that and think with any morals or reason, you just did as you were told.
That’s what happens when you go into shock, you’re too scared to say ‘no’, you just... Do…”

I thought about her words… Deeply… I let them slowly but surely sink into my mind…
She was right…
I thought I was unbreakable, that the past events wouldn’t be able to affect me. The clone killing made me feel sick inside, granted, but I hadn’t realised what it had done to me. I had tried to cover my emotions, so I hadn’t seen it, but deep down I had been scarred, and only now had it revealed itself.

“You’ve been so strong all this time Callum, it was only a matter of time before you broke, and on that bridge, you finally did…
And that’s okay… Nopony is judging you for what you did, we are all scared of Twilight’s behaviour, we are being as obedient as you are, what you did, was forced upon you…”

“But it was still wrong…” I sighed back.

“It is a sacrifice you’ve had to make for this quest, and a big sacrifice at that…
You are not evil for doing it Callum; the blood is on Twilight’s hooves.”

I sniffed and looked down, only to have a hoof lift my chin back up; we made eye contact for a good five seconds before she finally spoke again.

“You are not a bad person. You’re our protector, our guide, and our friend…” She told me.

At that, I began to cry once more, but differently this time, I was crying with relief, and love.
We hugged tightly before I stood up and gave myself a small shake.

“Thank you…” I sighed.

“Don’t mention it.”

“No, really I-”

“Ev-er… I don’t normally get emotional and soppy like that, especially to guys.”

I smiled, despite all my previous thoughts and feelings, I had a new favourite pony, and new best friend.

“Come on, let’s find that shard.” She said with a smile.

We walked back through the jungle to the rest of the group side by side, the both of us smiling…

“I see the beast has calmed down.” Twilight snorted as we returned.

“Shut up Twi.” Rainbow Dash grunted.

“Yeah Twilight, just cut it out.” Applejack said, frowning.

“After all that’s happened, can you give the guy a break, for at least a day?” Rainbow continued.

“So much for loyalty.” Twilight scoffed.

“Actually, she’s being more loyal than ever, to someone who’s been a better friend than you, someone more deserving of her loyalty.” Rarity spoke up.

“How dare you compare me to him!” Twilight growled.

“Then why don't shut up about him!” Rarity screeched.

The whole group went silent, we all stared at Rarity for a moment.

“Damn…” Rainbow Dash whistled.

Twilight huffed and turned around, I went and picked up my phone and switched it on, thankfully the battery had barely drained and would last for a few more days before dying out. I waited for it to load and then opened my Maps app to find out where we were…

“Dear sweet Celestia! They took us all that way!?” Rarity gasped as she saw our location.

We had come all the way across the town, a good ten miles from where we started at least, their compound was right on the edge of the jungle on the other side.

“Check it out! The orb shard’s right there!” Dash yelled, jabbing the screen with her hoof.

The shard was indeed, no more than a few miles away, being the early afternoon we actually had a small chance of finding it before the sun went down. I took a screenshot of the shard’s location before the app closed.

“Hey Sparky, we’ve got a bearing on the shard and our location, ready to move?” Rainbow Dash called to Twilight.

The purple unicorn walked back to the group and simply snorted, giving her a ‘no shit, Sherlock’ gesture.

“Let’s go get that shard! Woo!” Pinkie squeaked.

We all tightened our bag straps before heading into the jungle, me walking besides Rainbow Dash.

“Hey, Dash, can I ask you something?” I asked.

“Sure.” She hummed.

“How does Pinkie, you know, function?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, the other day when you were all in those cages, Ingeo was yelling and pointing his gun at her, and she was purely terrified, but now she seems to bounce back to her normal self like it never happened.” I elaborated, scratching my chin.

“Well, that’s the thing with Pinkie, she’s a mystery, but I’ve known her for years, and she’s told me that she has something called, ‘negative short term memory loss’; she remembers good things, but forgets bad things almost instantly.” Dash explained.

“Hm, fair enough…” I mumbled.

{So, Pinkie is the pony version of Dory from Finding Nemo…} I thought to myself.

We kept walking through the jungle, and for the first time in a long time, I was able to take in the beauty of the world around me once more.
After having a little cry and opening up to a close friend, I was able to release all the stress and tension I had been building up. My shock, my emotion, my anger and sadness, everything negative had been removed.
I looked around to see nature’s beauty, the green leaves, and the moss on the trees, the birdsong and buzzing of insects, the wonders of nature showed itself to me, and I took it in with glee.

“Isn’t it wonderful, this place?” I asked.

“Stop it.” Dash said bluntly.

“Stop what?”

“Being gay.” She replied.

“Do you want to go there? Rainbow hair.” I teased.

“Hey, my mane and tail may look gay, but you act gay, which is worse.” She spat playfully.

“How do I act gay?” I asked defensively.

Dash combed her mane back with a hoof and mockingly impersonated me.

“Ooh, look at the night sky, so beautiful… Look at the trees, they’re so wonderful!” She said in the sassiest voice she could accomplish.

“Enjoying the beauty of nature is not-”

“See! You’re doing it again! ‘Enjoying the beauty of nature!’ That’s gay!” She interrupted.

“How is it gay?” I squawked.

“Just everything about it dude!”

“Fine, I just won’t talk then.” I grumbled.

“So, you’re going to give me the silent treatment? Just like a girl does? Ha! Gaaayy!” Rainbow Dash taunted, trotting ahead, leaving me to walk alone.

“I can’t wait to see what this shard looks like…” I said to Applejack.

“Yeah, me too, I’ve only heard stories about the orb and all of the history of the world and all.” She replied.

“I’m dead excited.” I grinned.

“Yeah…” Applejack hummed as her mind wandered off to other things.

After a small while, Applejack looked back to me.

“Hey, are you alright?”

“Yeah, fine. Why?” I asked.

“Well, you were really shaken up back there, so I’m just asking if you’re okay now, that’s all.” She replied.

“Yeah, sorry about that. I’m fine now though.” I told her with a smile.

“Good to know.” She said before trotting ahead.

I looked at her hoof to see the barb wire wound had completely healed up, not a mark to be seen, the Kuphila Amanzi was some pretty strong stuff, Zecora sure knew how to make a concoction.

I kept walking at the back of the group and let the others walk and talk amongst themselves; we kept walking for a good half hour before Rainbow Dash stopped us.

“Yo guys, we have a problem!” She called from the front of the group.

We caught up with her to see what the matter was, and we soon found out; water, and lots of it…
The whole jungle ahead was nothing but a marsh, the water was murky and green, making it impossible to see what was beneath, and by the looks of things there was no solid ground for quite a while.

“What do we do?” Applejack asked.

“I can waterproof our bags.” Twilight suggested, her horn lighting up.

“Ah, so you can use magic again now.” I said to her.

“Yes, I’ve had my magic back since yesterday.” She replied.

“And you didn’t think to help me deal with Ingeo or Vladimir?” I asked.

“I didn’t think to.”

“So much for the Element of Magic.” I scoffed.

Twilight growled in frustration, but then noticed the dirty looks from the others and dropped it.

“So, if you waterproof our bags, we can walk through this, shouldn’t be that deep.” Rainbow Dash said.

“I am not wading through that muck!” Rarity gasped.

“Well, you have to.” I replied.

“Well, I will not.” She snorted.

“Idea.” Applejack bluntly said as she raised a hoof.

We all looked to face her.

“If Callum, Rainbow, me, and Twilight go through the water, you wait here, and when we find solid ground, you can teleport yourselves over to join us.” She suggested.

“That’s a great idea!” Rarity declared.

Rainbow Dash and I rolled our eyes at the same time.

“Right, in that case there’s no need to waterproof the bags, Rarity can teleport them with her.” I pointed out.

“Can we at least waterproof ourselves?” Dash asked.

“The spell doesn’t work well with living creatures, I could use the spell on you, but your fur would fall out.” Twilight told her.

“Right, scratch that then.” Dash said quickly.

I took my rucksack off, as did the other three, before we stood at the edge of the murky water.

“How deep do you think it is y'all?” Applejack quizzed.

“Find out for us!” Dash squealed with laughter as she suddenly pushed Applejack in.

AJ screamed with surprise before falling into the green watery abyss, she was completely submerged for a moment and we couldn’t see her at all, until her head finally rose to the surface.

“YOU FUCKIN’ ASSHOLE RAINBOW DASH!” She screeched.

“So, how deep is it?” Rainbow chuckled.

“Get your ass in this here water, right now…” Applejack growled.

“Meh, okay.” Dash giggled before jumping in.

I was the next to enter the water, it was surprisingly warm, I was expecting colder. I slid in properly to find it took me just up to waist height, for the ponies the water rose to their lower necks.

After a moment’s hesitation, Twilight also lowered herself into the water.

“How is it?” Rarity asked.

“Want to find out?” I asked back.

“I’m grand thank you.” She said full of worry, taking a few steps back.

I looked to Applejack and Dash, and then to Twilight, who nodded at me.

“Right, let’s move.” I said.

We began wading through the water, it wasn’t as bad as it looked. I had assumed the water was going to be slimy and thick due to its green colour, but it was just as normal as a loaf of bread at a bakery.

“You like the water Callum?” Dash asked, looking back to face me.

“Love the stuff.” I merrily replied.

“So you like it when you’re all wet?”

“Nice. Mature.” I retorted bluntly.

She snickered to herself as she turned around and kept walking behind Applejack, who had taken the lead.

“How much further does the water go?” Twilight questioned.

“I don’t know, funny enough I’ve never been here.” I replied.

“Why not?”

“What sort of question is that? I’m a sixteen year old boy, not a bloody world traveller, I’d only just left school when you lot showed up.” I answered.

She simply huffed and continued to follow me as I waded through the swamp.

About ten minutes later we saw a large bank ahead, dry land.

“Huzzah!” I cheered.

“About time.” Dash grunted.

I took the lead with Applejack and walked beside her, when I noticed something in the water ahead.

“Hang on, look.” I said to Applejack.

“What’s the matter?” She asked.

I pointed at the large object, and we slowed down to take a look from afar. It was dark, and a greenish brown in colour, and appeared to be covered in bark.

“It’s just some log Callum, I doubt it’ll bite you.” Applejack chuckled.

I squinted at the ‘log’, and looked at it carefully. It was very log-like, it was dark brown with a green hint, it was slightly ridged, but there was one thing that put me off…

“I’m pretty sure it will, look…” I said shakily.

We both looked even harder at the log, only to notice two very small, shiny beads…

Eyes…

“Fuck…” Applejack and I said at the same time.

“What is it?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Stop.” I ordered.

“What’s going on?” Twilight demanded.

“We need to go that way.” I said, pointing to our left.

“Why?”

“Crocodile…” I answered.

“What!?” Twilight screeched.

“Over there, there’s a crocodile, we need to head further to the right and avoid it.” I repeated.

“You’re telling me there’s a crocodile in the water with us!” She continued to scream, jumping back.

The mare tried to run back and lost her balance in the water, falling over into the water, flailing around desperately. I grabbed her by the back of the neck and held her still.

“If you keep dicking around like you are now, it will know you’re here, stop fucking moving!” I growled into her ear.

She froze solid and looked at me, shaking nervously.

“Slowly, follow me.” I said, loud enough for Dash and Applejack to hear.

I headed further across the swamp, away from the croc and towards the land in a diagonal direction, after making some headway I told Applejack to take the lead as I took the rear of the group, if the crocodile happened to attack us, I’d rather it take me than the ponies, their lives were more crucial to the mission.

“Not far now.” I said reassuringly to the gang.

I looked back to find my fears had come true, the crocodile was following us, the scaly bastard was moving towards us still disguised as a log, appearing to slowly drift in our direction.

“Pick up the pace.” I ordered.

“Why?” Dashie asked.

“He’s coming this way.” I replied.

“Picking up the pace!” Twilight yelped as she tried to sprint to the land overtaking Applejack.

“You fucking idiot!” I yelled.

I looked back to see the crocodile had detected Twilight’s distress and was swimming towards us at speed.

“Run!” I shouted to Dash and Applejack.

They did just that, they sprinted after Twilight as fast as they could. I too, moved as fast as possible, pushing my toes down at the ground below the water before pushing with all my might, launching myself through the swamp as fast as I could.

Rainbow Dash was the first to reach land, followed by Applejack and Twilight at the same time, they had been able to get there faster than I, as having four legs gave them an advantage in the water. I took a glance back to see the crocodile had disappeared.

“Where is it?” I called, still running to the land.

“I don’t know! I can’t see it!” Dash yelled back.

I kept wading as fast as I could until I finally reached the land, Dash lowered her hoof to help me up.

“Come on!” She grunted.

I took her hoof and steadily pulled myself up the bank, when she suddenly screamed and let go of me.

The next forty seconds of my life became the most intense experience to date, there was a loud splash from behind me as a horrific pain shot all down my left leg and I screamed in agony as the crocodile burst out of the water and snatched my leg in its jaws. I could feel each individual crooked tooth as the animal’s mouth snapped onto me like a barbed mouse trap.

Applejack bravely lunged forward and held her hoof out but it was too late, for the croc had yanked me back into the water; I went with its movement to spare my leg from being torn apart. It let go and then bit down a second time on my thigh, getting a better grip. I once again screamed in my pain before the creature tried to perform the ‘death roll’, I once again went with its roll to avoid being ripped to shreds and my entire body was submerged into the water, all my vision went dark green and blurry as my head was taken below the surface, I shut my eyes tight before opening them again, forcing myself to ignore the irritation in my eyes and to concentrate on the crocodile. As quickly as I could, I reached into the holster of my free leg and withdrew Vladimir’s military knife.
I made an attempt to stab it, but was shaken violently and I missed. My second attempt struck, slicing the creature down the side of its head. I couldn’t see anything and forced myself to keep rolling along with it, or my leg would be savagely torn, beyond any means of healing.
My third stab made its mark, I brought the blade down and it sank into the beast’s eye. Its grip on my leg loosened as it violently thrashed around in pain and shock. I pulled back and made another stab, right into the centre of its head, I pushed the knife as hard as I could into it, and the crocodile shook itself before letting go of me completely. It slowed right down and I was able to roll myself to its underside where I stabbed it again in the throat to ensure it was dead, I let go of the knife and left it inside the animal’s neck.

It happened as quickly as it started, and I was finally able to lift my head above the water and take a gasp of air, I rubbed my eyes to clear them of the dirty water and I looked up to see the others looking down at me in shock. I looked back, panting, too out of breath to speak; I looked at my hands to see they were covered in watery blood, thankfully not mine.

“Dude… Are… Are you okay?” Dash stuttered from the bank.

I took another deep breath inwards, before my funny nature kicked in.

“Cor well crikey! She’s a snappy little Sheila isn't she!” I replied in an Australian accent.

“Did you just kill that thing?” Twilight asked, completely astounded that I was alive.

“I did!” I merrily answered.

I took a stretch before a painful sting began to pulsate in my leg as the adrenaline subsided, the pain returned stronger than I’d expected it to; I gritted my teeth and nudged around with my foot to find the croc under the water. It didn’t take long to find it and I squatted down to grab one of its legs in both my hands.

“What are you doing?” Rainbow Dash called to me when my head rose above the water again.

I simply grunted as I dragged the crocodile to the river bank and lifted its head out of the water, causing Twilight to jump.

“Can you use your magic to help lift this thing up?” I asked her.

“You cannot be serious!” She shouted back.

“Well, I am.” I retorted.

She glared at me intently, before looking back to the crocodile.

“Is it dead?”

“No… He's pretending... I’m totally just carrying its limp body as part of a theatrical piece!” I replied sarcastically.

I had a slight growl in my tone, regardless of being sarcastic, I was frustrated with her constant questioning and wished that just once she’d do as I asked.

“Why do you want it up here?” She asked.

“I’ll explain in a minute! Just help me for crying out loud!” I growled.

She scowled at me before finally obeying and lit up her horn as she began to assist me. The crocodile’s head and neck glowed purple as it was lifted without my effort and raised out of the bank. I put my hands on its lower body and helped lift it, my feet sinking into the watery mud slightly as I did so.

The croc was finally off the bank and onto the land; Applejack and Dashie lowered their hooves to pull me up. As I put my foot down into the bank the bites proved to be painful injuries as the sharp throbbing began, it almost felt like being bitten all over again.
I growled in pain as I was pulled up onto the ground properly, I was too exhausted to stand up and simply lay on my back before sitting up. I looked at my cargo trousers to find the left leg of the clothing had been torn; the crocodile’s teeth must have caught on them, on the bright side, that had at least helped to make the bites less serious.

“Dude, are you okay?” Dash asked a second time, more gently and caring this time.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” I replied, looking down to see my bloody leg.

“Jeez, that’s pretty bad.” Applejack mumbled.

“I’ll be fine.” I shrugged, trying not to show any weakness.

In all honesty, the bite wasn’t that bad. The crocodile did get a good grip on me, but because I rolled with it there was no tearing, nor did it bite too hard, its first attack was simply to subdue me, not kill me, therefore I was able to counter attack in the way I did.

“Right, if you’re sure, but I want Fluttershy to give it a looksie.” Applejack told me.

“Alright.” I replied.

“I’ll send a flare.” Twi said, her horn lighting up.

The tip of her horn sparked a few times, before a purple rocket fired up and shone a light so bright it was almost like looking at the sun, it was then when I heard Pinkie Pie somewhere in the distance, way back where we first got into the water.

“Double sun poweeeeerrr!!!” She screamed from afar.

{Jeez, if I can hear it from all the way over here, poor Rarity and Fluttershy must be deaf now…} I thought.

There was then a white flash, and the other three appeared a few centimetres from the ground, where they comfortably landed and looked around. My thoughts were proven correct, as Rarity and Fluttershy rubbed their ears in discomfort after landing.

“Please, never, do that… Again…” Rarity said slowly to Pinkie Pie.

“Never say never!” Pinkie squealed as she ran away and then chased her tail.

I shuddered as the pink mare quoted none other than Justin Beiber, the biggest faggot of all faggatory…
I was taken by surprise as I heard a loud gasp, I turned around to see Fluttershy was staring at the dead crocodile in shock.

“It kind of attacked us… Well, it attacked Callum anyway. Don’t worry though, Callum sorted it out.” Rainbow Dash chuckled reassuringly.

Fluttershy looked to face me in shock, before looking at my leg.

“Oh my gosh! Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, don’t worry.” I answered kindly.

She came up to me and inspected my leg, prodding at the bite holes, making me flinch slightly as a small sharp pain once again shot into my leg.

“Why… Do… You… Always… Poke… My… Wounds!?” I growled through gritted teeth.

“She’s a poker!” A hoarse voice said.

It sounded muffled, and didn’t sound like any of the six, the voice actually sounded rather male.

“Who said that?” I asked aloud.

Fluttershy giggled and put her hoof under her mane, when she pulled her hoof back our, there was something perched on her hoof.

“I found him while we were waiting for you.” She told me.

Upon her hoof was a bright blue Macaw parrot, it had bright orange circles around its huge shiny black eyes which shone like marbles. Just around its big curved dark grey beak was a very thin orange lining, his plumage was unflawed, he looked very well groomed; no doubt Fluttershy had been smothering it with love.

“What a cutie… Hello there little guy...” I said fondly to the bird.

At this, the parrot turned to look directly at me, where it appeared to frown.

“Make any cracker jokes and I’ll peck your eyes out!” He squawked.

Chapter Twenty: Piece by Piece

Chapter Twenty - Piece by Piece

“His name’s Blu, I found him a few minutes after you all got into the water and walked off.” Fluttershy explained, stroking the parrot’s neck.

“Who’s a pretty pony? Who’s a pretty pony?” Blu squawked kindly as she stroked him.

“Oh you…” Fluttershy giggled.

“So, does he talk well?” I asked.

Blu answered for himself by taking off and landing on my shoulder.

“Just fine! Just fine!”

{Standard…} I thought to myself.

“This is all fine and dandy, but can we please find this orb shard now?” Applejack pleaded.

Blu flew back to Fluttershy as I turned around to face Applejack.

“Good point, it shouldn’t be far now, let’s try to find it before the sun goes down.” I said.

I took my phone out of my pocket and went to my ‘Albums’ area, where I had conveniently taken a screenshot of the orb shard’s location before the ‘Maps’ app closed. Blu glided over and perched himself on my shoulder to take a look, giving a long ‘hhmmmm’ as he observed the screen. We were closer than expected. The shard’s location was about a mile from our location.

“We’ll find it and still have time for dinner by the looks of things.” Rarity said, looking at my screenshot.

At that, my belly growled. It was at that moment that I realised that I hadn’t eaten a thing for the past two days, I was absolutely starving.

“Speaking of dinner, let’s have a snack now, I’m famished…” I sighed.

“You’re what?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Hungry.” I replied bluntly.

“Why didn’t you just-”

“Because why not?” I interrupted, knowing she was going to question my elegant wording.

I took my rucksack from Rarity and opening it up.

{Mother… Fucker…} I thought angrily to myself.

My bag had been raided; all the food was gone, along with my phone charger.

“Oh dude, that sucks…” Rainbow said sympathetically as she peered over my shoulder to look in the bag.

“What’s happened?” Rarity asked.

“Callum’s bag got looted.” Dash answered.

“Oh darling… What have they taken?”

“Everything except my spare clothes.” I grunted.

“Do you think they’ve taken our stuff too?” Applejack asked.

“Impossible, the bags are enchanted with Discord’s magic.” Twilight told us.

“Discord’s?” I quizzed.

“Discord put the enchantment on our bags, they’re not just bigger on the inside, but the internals of the bag is in a completely dimension itself, it can only be properly opened by the bag’s owner.” She explained.

“So it’s basically the TARDIS?” I asked.

“The what?” The whole group asked at the same time.

“Ugh, just, never mind… It's a human thing.” I said, shaking my head.

“Time and relative dimension in space! Quark!” Blu squawked loudly.

“Well, at least you get it.” I said to the parrot.

“So, why did you want this crocodile up here?” Applejack asked.

“The same reason I just checked my bag.” I grumbled.

“You’re not thinking what I think you’re thinking… Are you…?” Fluttershy stuttered.

I nodded, and there was a small moment of silence.

“What do you mean?” Rainbow Dash quizzed.

“Do you think it’s time they knew?” I asked Fluttershy.

“I think so, yes.” She replied.

“Can you tell them?”

“Okay.”

I took a step back and let Fluttershy break the news to the group.

“Everypony, I have to make a confession on Callum’s behalf, can you all come closer?” She asked.

The group happily obeyed, unsure of what was about to be said, Fluttershy looked at all the faces, she looked confident which was odd, seeing as she was normally nervous when it came to talking to a group.

“Now, Callum and I have already had this discussion, and I see no problem with it, it is natural, and I want you all to show understanding and kindness please.” She said peacefully.

The group all nodded, besides Twilight of course, who rolled her eyes at Fluttershy with an expression which basically said ‘just get this over with.’

“Callum, much like many animals back home in Equestria, is an omnivore. As well as normal food, he eats meat.” Fluttershy explained.

Silence.
Pure… Unnerving… Silence…
I looked from face to face, whom were all looking back at me, unsure how to take in what they had been told. In their eyes I could see them battling their mixed emotions, fear, trust, horror, tolerance, and judgement...

The silence seemed to last for an eternity, before Rainbow Dash finally spoke.

“Dude, is this a joke? Or are you being serious here?” She asked me.

“I’m being serious.” I replied.

“Right…” She quickly said, nodding very slightly.

“Like I said, he is a monster.” Twilight spoke proudly, lifting her chin into the air.

“He is not a monster.” Fluttershy gasped.

“No Fluttershy, it’s alright. Twilight’s quite right to feel that way. This will obviously be quite a shock to you all, it’ll take time for you to come to grips with it.” I said kindly to Flutters.

“Not really.” Pinkie said happily, bouncing up to me, “As long as you don’t eat me, I don’t see a problem with it!” She giggled, running off to grab a stick.

“What?” I said quietly, rather astounded by Pinkie’s reaction.

Rarity jumped on board and joined Pinkie in my defence.

“You know what? Pinkie’s right! We have no right to come to your world and criticise you for your natural diet. Griffons eat meat, and we've never despised them for it, what makes you so different?”

“Yeah, it’s just what your species eats, I feed Winona tinned dog food, and that’s got meat in it.” Applejack joined in.

A big smile started to light up my face, I had not expected this sort of reaction at all. I had made a problem out of nothing; I had wrongly assumed their collective character and had convinced myself that I would be subject to their judgement.

“Remember Callum, our world isn’t as pristine as your make-believe cartoon makes it out to be, even the best parts of Equestria have bad patches. Eating meat is far from the worst of things that have happened, and still happen back home.” Rarity went on to tell me.

“Such as?” I asked.

“I’d rather not go into it, but trust me, there are just as many bad parts to Equus as there are to Earth.” She replied.

{I highly doubt that…} I thought.

“To be clear though, you’re respectful enough to the critters before, right?” Applejack asked.

“Of course, I have respect for all animals, including Mister Crocodile here.” I said, nudging the croc with a foot.

“Why do you respect that? It just tried to kill you!” Dash asked in surprise.

“He’s a carnivore, it’s just his nature. In his eyes, I was simply his next meal.” I explained.

“It’s the ciiiircle… The ciiiircle… Of liiiiiiife!” Pinkie sang.

We turned to face her to see she’s used the stick to draw a circle in the ground with the word ‘life’ written in the middle of it.

“Yeah, that.” I chuckled.

“Why didn’t you tell us sooner?” Applejack asked.

“Well, I thought you’d all react really badly to it.” I said.

“Nonsense darling, we come from a world with a large diversity of species, all with different diets and physical needs. We aren’t bothered in the slightest, right everypony?” Rarity said to everyone.

Everyone nodded and smiled.

“Just so long as you don’t prepare the meat around us; eating meat is one thing, but tampering with a corpse is another.” Rarity finished.

“Oh of course, I wouldn’t even dream of cutting up a body around you lot.” I replied.

Fluttershy cringed.

“I assume you're wanting to cook this here crocodile?” Applejack asked.

“Well yeah, I wouldn't dare eat it raw.” I answered, chuckling.

“Heh, after all that stuff back there with Ingeo, you must be starving!” Rainbow said.

“Indeed…” I grumbled as my belly caused more discomfort.

“So, how are you going to eat it?” Dash asked.

“Well I’ll just cut off the good bits, put it in a bag, and cook it later tonight when we make camp.” I replied.

“Need a bag?” Rarity offered, levitating a plastic bag out of her saddlebag.

I took the bag and smiled, before turning to the croc.

“You guys head off to find the orb, I’ll catch up when I’m done.” I told the six.

“I’ll lead! I’ll lead! Off to get a shiny!” Blu squawked and started flying off.

“Wait! Come back!” Fluttershy wailed, running after him.

{That parrot is a genius…} I thought.

I had instantly clocked onto the parrot's dialect, he was going to lead us to the shard.

“How does he know the way?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“He saw my phone; he probably knows what we’re looking for.” I answered.

“Allons-y! Allons-y!” He carked and flew off away from us.

The group ran after him as I turned to the crocodile.

“Alright fella, lets open you up…” I mumbled, taking the knife from its throat.

I stood above the creature, before I plunged the blade into it and began to skin the animal…

“You’ve got quite the muscles Mister…” I hummed as I removed the croc’s shoulder muscle.

I’d skinned many an animal before back home, having four acres brought many squirrels and rabbits to the land, giving my brother and I plenty to shoot, but I had never killed for fun, I only ever killed to eat.
I put my hands under the animal’s ribcage and tried to pry them away; the ribs would most likely be one of the tastiest parts with the right seasoning. I pulled upwards, only for my bloody fingers to slip, I may have cooked rabbit and squirrel, but this damn thing was bigger than me! This was a rather big challenge and learning curve for me, I was certainly no butcher.
I picked up the military knife and began to hack at the top parts of the ribcage, hoping for the best.

“You’re not exactly a hatchet, but you’ll do…” I complimented the weapon as it was able to break off some of the bone holding the ribcage in place.

A good few hard strikes later, the left rack of ribs came loose.

“Nom…” I chuckled.

This job, though bloody, was actually rather enjoyable. I liked living off the land back at home, so to kill and skin a crocodile was quite a treat. While many people would understandably be disgusted at the prospect, I personally found it interesting to open up a creature and examine the insides; it was basically like dissecting a frog in a biology lesson, just on much bigger proportions…

After a good five to ten minutes of removing the muscles from the croc, I had filled the plastic bag to the point where no more meat could be squeezed in. I used the back end of the military knife to saw through the tail, as the majority of the tail was pure muscle. I tied up the top of the bag and looped the handles through one of my belt holes; I then stuck the tail in my rucksack, leaving the messy end on the outside the bag to ensure the whole thing didn’t get bloody.
I slid back down the bank to the water just to wash my hands and arms, as they were rather blood-stained.

As I was climbing up the river bank again, I looked back to see another crocodile moving towards me.

“Fuck off.” I barked as I climbed back up to safety.

I took a deep breath inwards as I stretched, gaining a satisfying crunch in my spine. The wrestle with the crocodile was both draining and beyond terrifying; I cast my mind back to the time I was playing Far Cry Three on the Xbox, and my first ambush encounter with a crocodile, I had genuinely yelped and almost lobbed the controller at the screen, since then I’ve always had a slight phobia of crocodiles…

I slung my rucksack over my shoulder and stretched once more before heading off in the same direction as the ponies.

“Let’s a’go! Ya-hoo!” I sang to myself, mimicking Super Mario.

I had been walking for no more than a minute when I saw Blu flying towards me.

“Kill me now! Kill me now!” He squawked.

I raised an eyebrow as he landed on my shoulder.

“What’s up?”

“Pinkie doesn’t stop talking! Squeaky squeaky!”

“Yeah, she takes a lot of getting used to.” I told him.

“Now you tell me! Now you tell me!” He cawed.

I kept walking with him on my shoulder, and we headed off to meet the others again.

I’d been on the move for a good five minutes before I caught up with the group; I assumed they had slowed down for me. As I reached them, Blu hopped off my shoulder and flew ahead.

“Not far now! Caark!”

“Hm…” Dash hummed, frowning at the bird.

We continued following the bird as we were led through the woodland. The plastic bag brushed my hand as I walked, reminding me that I needed to get the meat chilled to prevent food poisoning later on.

“Hey, Rarity?” I said as I walked beside the unicorn.

She gave a friendly, curious hum.

“Didn’t you say your bag came with a fridge?” I quizzed.

“I did.” She smiled.

“Could I keep the bag in there? Just so the meat doesn't spoil, I’d rather not have food poisoning.” I asked her.

“Of course darling, there’s a space left at the bottom.” She happily answered, removing her bag and opening it.

When the bag opened, it looked just as normal as ever, as though there was nothing inside. Rarity’s horn lit up and the bag flashed, the content of the bag was now covered with a lid. I leaned forward and opened the lid to find it was like a cooler box.

“That’s cool…” I sighed in awe.

“It’s not half bad.” Rarity agreed.

I took the plastic bag and placed it inside, as my hand entered the box, it was cold; obviously that was expected, but the true extent of magic existing in real life still caught me off guard from time to time…
After putting all the meat into the fridge, I closed the lid and Rarity resealed her bag, I looked up to see Blu doing barrel rolls and other fancy manoeuvres as he led us to the shard; I curiously watched the parrot as he performed his aerial display, he was clearly intelligent, was Fluttershy the reason behind his conscience? Ordinary animals on Earth were nowhere near as smart as Blu, so he must be having some influence from Fluttershy.

“Flutters?” I said as I walked beside her.

The pegasus hummed curiously, looking at me as we continued to follow the bird.

“How did you find Blu exactly?” I asked.

“Just perched on a tree, minding his own business and preening his wings. I called to him and he looked at me, before going back to preening, so I sang to him. That’s when he flew down to me and stood on the ground, I started talking to him, making eye contact in a polite way, and he just decided to talk back.” She explained.

“So you’re saying, when you sing to animals, they respond to you?” I asked.

“I guess so, yes.” She replied, looking down shyly.

{So, you don’t need a horn to possess magic… Interesting…} I thought to myself.

I had it figured that Fluttershy had some form of natural magic in her voice, singing seemed to cast an enchantment of sorts; meaning that whenever she sang, animals in earshot would feel a connection with her, a bond, so to speak…

“For Celestia’s sake… More damn water!” Applejack growled.

I looked up to see we had indeed reached another watery area, it was somewhat of a lake, a very big lake.

“Shiny in the pool! Shiny in the pool!” Blu croaked as he landed on my shoulder.

“The orb shard?” I asked.

“You got it Doc! You got it!” He chirped.

“Well, I guess we're swimming then.” I shrugged.

“Yeah, I don’t swim.” Dashie snorted.

“None of us do.” Applejack told me.

“What?”

“We don’t swim too well, hooves aren’t the best for aquatic movement you see.” Rarity said.

“But, Pinkie swam in plenty of episo-”

“Imaginary TV show, reality. Contrast it.” Twilight snapped, glaring at me.

“But even here on Earth, horses can swim.” I told them.

“We can swim, just not very well.” Rarity explained.

"Right then, I guess I'm swimming solo." I grumbled.

“I don't think that's a good idea. That water is so crawling with more crocodiles!” Rainbow Dash pointed out.

“I can scan for life.” Twilight spoke up.

“That would be very helpful.” I smiled.

Twilight’s horn lit up and a thin purple laser beam shot from the tip of the horn and into the lake, where it expanded, engulfing the whole lake, it only lasted for about three seconds.

“I have good news, and I have bad news.” Twilight told me.

“Go on…?”

“I've found the shard, it’s over on the left side, near the middle of the lake.”

“And the bad news?”

“There are seventeen crocodiles in there.”

“Perfect!” I shouted.

“You’re still getting that shard.” Twilight growled.

I sighed in frustration; I’d had enough crocodile encounters for one day.

“Surely we can bait them away to one side of the area?” Rarity suggested.

“Possibly.” Twilight grunted.

“Clone me again, use him as bait.” I pointed out.

“Actually, that's a pretty decent idea...” Twilight mumbled.

"Good call, just don't get caught." I warned her.

The same process as before took place and a purple hue outlined my body as I felt warmer and warmer. The white ball of light formed before me, taking my entire structure, my DNA, and replicating it into a complete copy of myself. The ball grew bigger and bigger, before it flashed brightly, in its place stood, well, me…

“I’ve gotten thinner.” I mumbled.

“That’s what you get when you only eat one bowl of rice a day.” The clone replied.

Circling him, I eyed my mirrored self up and down and smirked.

“Is it weird to be mildly attracted to yourself?”

“I knew it!” Rainbow Dash bellowed in accusation.

“For goodness sake! It was a joke!” I growled.

“It’s okay me, your secret’s safe with you.” My clone said.

“Come on, don’t do the whole ‘you’re me and I’m you’ malarkey, that's just corny.” I retorted.

"Are you boys going or what?” Applejack deadpanned.

We both looked at her in sync.

“But of course…” We said.

We looked at one another.

“Stop doing that.” We both ordered.

“I said stop!”

The whole group was laughing at this point, watching my clone and I say every word in complete sync.

“Callums! Stop arguing and get a move on, the both of you!” Applejack laughed.

We stopped, only for the clone to playfully punch my arm, I punched him back, he punched me back harder.

“For goodness sake, stop acting like children and get the damn shard!” Twilight barked.

Playtime, over.

“Righty tighty, let’s go kill myself.” The clone said before stretching.

“He won't feel the pain if he gets caught, right?” I asked.

“’No, I've cloned you without any pain receptors.” Twilight answered.

“Oh good, here I was thinking you were a total bitch!” The clone chuckled.

“I can always revert that.”

“Nice pony! Nice pony!” My clone squawked, impersonating Blu.

“Don’t copy me! Don’t copy me!” Blu carked.

“You’re stalling.” Twilight pointed out.

“Maybe because I don’t want to jump into a crocodile infested lake!” I spat back.

“I can teleport you there, if you'd like?”

At first, the empty threat was a ridiculous idea, but it could actually work to our advantage.

"Actually, with that in mind, what if you levitate me above the water where the shard is? Then I can drop down to the bottom with haste and get the shard right away, instead of fumbling around underwater for it?"

"Hm, okay, sounds good."

Her civil attitude was enough to tell me that she was genuinely pleased with the idea, which brought a smile to my face.

“Right, uh… Me! Go kill yourself!” I shouted.

My replica nodded and gave a salute, before skipping along the edge of the lake to the other side.

I shrugged, assuming Twilight had also modified his mind-set so he actually wanted to die or something…
I opened up my rucksack and retrieved my swimming goggles from one of the inner pockets.

“I thought they took everything but your clothes.” Rarity quizzed.

“Goggles are wearable accessories; does that not count as clothing?” I retorted.

“Touché…” She hummed.

I took off my shirt, followed by my shoes and socks.

“Dude, what are you doing?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Taking off my clothes.” I replied bluntly.

“Why?”

“So I can swim better.”

Dash simply hummed as I proceeded to take off my cargo trousers as well, that was when Fluttershy yelped and came up to me.

“If you prod those bite wounds, I’m going to tickle you to death.” I growled.

“But they haven’t been treated!” She told me as she got even closer.

“Treat them after I get the shard.” I ordered.

“But they look really sore.” She mumbled, brushing my lower thigh to inspect the wound.

“Right, I warned you.” I grunted.

“Eep…”

“When I come back with the shard, expect my wrath.” I playfully spat, glaring at her.

She squeaked, trying to stifle her grin.

“Callum. Shard.” Applejack said, bringing me back to my task.

I faced the water and put on my goggles, before looking to the clone and nodding. The clone ran ankle-deep in the water and ran in circles.

“Here fishy fishy fishy FISHEEEEY!” He called in a high pitched voice.

He kicked the water about and jumped around to attract every crocodile in the lake, and in mere seconds I could see them rising to the surface, their dark bodies under the water become more visible as they slowly drifted to my clone.
I slowly walked into the water, lightly placing each foot to avoid attention from any crocodiles nearby.

“Step right up! Step right up! Living, breathing, all you can eat buffet! All cuts of meat! Liver too!” The clone yelled as he skipped around the shallows.

“You really are insane…” I heard Rarity say from behind me.

“On the special’s menu! Guess what I’ve got!? A BRAIN! Juicy brain! Barely used! Come and get it!”

I frowned, before I jumped in shock as a crocodile launched itself out of the water at the clone, who miraculously dodged the unexpected attack.

“I said BARELY used croccy boy! Not entirely useless!” He roared with laughter as he continued hopping around the lake.

I decided to finally take the risk and went below the surface. Surprisingly the water was clearer than I thought, I could see a good three, maybe four metres ahead, enough to see a croc if one came to me.
I rose my head above the surface and looked to the shore, the clone had now definitely got the attention of all the crocs, he was skipping across the lakeside with about six or seven crocodiles now lying on the shore from attempts to grab him.

“Coccy croccy doo dah! Croccy croccy doo dah!” He sang as he skipped.

I moved using the breaststroke to reduce my presence in the water, and moved towards the centre of the lake. I was nearing the centre when I decided to check below for the shard, I took a few small breaths, before I inhaled deeply and went below, my vision taken over by a sea of green. After swimming down a few metres, I found the bottom and slowed down.

{Come on shard… Where are you…?} I thought as I slowly glided along, using my hands to claw myself along faster.

I looked left and right constantly, hoping to see something. I was disturbed in my search by a muffled sound, it sounded like someone screaming, and coincidentally I needed another breath of air so I swam back up to the surface, as I was ascending the sound got louder and louder.
The second my head rose about the surface I could hear the dying screams of my clone, I looked across the lake to see him desperately crawling to the bank, his leg was horrifically torn and the shore was dyed red with his blood.
A crocodile lay by his side, it turned to face him and snapped his other leg in its jaws. He screamed in agony and tried to pull away, only for the croc to perform its death roll. Even from the middle of the lake, I could see his calf muscle split open and blood pour out over the croc’s muzzle, he screamed and screamed as he was dragged back to the water, where three other crocodiles joined in on the slaughter.

{You made him feel pain…} I thought in anger.

Twilight, fucking, Sparkle, was just as much a monster as I was when I killed an innocent man, she made my clone feel pain when she had the choice to remove it, what was even worse was that she lied about it!
I grinded my gritted teeth beneath my closed lips, I was going to grab the shard and deal with her as soon as possible. I took another deep breath and swam to the bottom of the lake, the screaming of my clone once again becoming muffled, before it died out entirely.

{Come on you shiny little bastard, show yourself…} I thought.

And as though my thoughts had been answered, I saw a dim glow to my left. I swam towards it to see the mud of the lake glowing quite brightly, I approached the mud and stuck my hands it, digging down to find the shard, after clawing for about a foot into the mud, I felt something hard. I stuck my hands in deep and grabbed it, and suddenly felt a great warmth within my head, and briefly saw a bright light.

{I AM REBORN} A Scottish voice screamed inside my head.

Needless to say, I was confused, but I was still underwater and didn't have the time to question it; I tightened my grip on the object in my hand and pulled it out.
Before my eyes, held within my hands was a glowing gem, it was about the same size as a fist, and was rather cone shaped.

{Got you…} I thought.

I suddenly felt like I was being watched and turned around, only to see a crocodile about a metre away from me. I nearly screamed in shock and lost all my air, but kept myself as calm as possible and observed the creature. It was side-on from me, and seemed not to notice me, but as I attempted to move away, it turned to face me.

{I’ve still got air in my lungs, bring it on big boy…} I thought menacingly.

I pulled the military knife from its sheath and gripped it firmly, then stared at the crocodile, waiting for it to make the first move, after about five seconds, it struck.
As the beast sped towards me with a mouth open wide, I got an estimate of where its jaws would snap, and did a little barrel roll of my own and evaded the attack as it brushed past me, where I quickly counter attacked with the knife, stabbing its eye and pushing the blade all the way into its head, quickly killing it. The animal jolted and shook violently for a second before going limp and sinking to the ground, I pulled the knife out and made my way to the surface, putting the knife back into its sheath. My lungs had been spent and were beginning to hurt, and my head began to ring.

I finally got to the surface and took a large gasp of air, before I made my way to the shore.

“Behind you!” Rainbow Dash shouted from the bank.

I looked back to see another crocodile swimming towards me.

“Fuck that shit.” I growled and swam faster.

I knew the crocodile would pick up its speed if I did, but if I swam fast enough I was certain I’d reach the shore before it caught me.

“He’s gaining on you!” Applejack called to me.

I swam even faster, at my absolute maximum. It’d be easier if I didn’t have the orb shard in one of my hands though. I finally reached the shallows and was able to stand on two feet but that didn’t stop the crocodile, as it unexpectedly launched itself out of the water at me and slammed its muzzle into my back, knocking me over.

“CALLUM!” Rarity screamed at the top of her lungs.

I rolled over and was able to place my hand on its lower jaw, when it made an attempt to snap at me, I rolled again and was able to get to my knees. It struck again and tried to bite my body, but missed and its head ended up underneath my belly. Without warning it lifted its head up and thrust forward, taking me off my feet and flipped me onto my back, I grunted in pain and rolled back a second time to avoid its next attack, it snapped at my head and I moved just in time, as the jaws snapped shut no more than an inch from my nose.

“Alright you bloody bugger…” I growled deeply.

I was able to squat, so my legs were ready to spring. As the crocodile launched at me once more, I hopped to the side and then pounced onto it, pressing my knees into the top of its head and neck to keep it rooted down. I put my hands on its muzzle as it attempted to thrash about and knock me off.

“Don’t die!” Fluttershy wailed, sobbing with fear.

The crocodile thrust its head back, causing me to lose my balance, I let go of its muzzle to steady myself, and reached for my knife, I removed it from the sheath and was about to strike when it chose to do a death roll and sent me rolling with it. The knife was knocked from my hand as my arm hit the ground and the crocodile’s neck ended up on my legs.

“The knife! Quick!” I shouted to Rarity.

She quickly used her magic to levitate the knife towards me, when the croc moved itself again, rising up and then planting its muzzle on my chest, I quickly wrapped my legs around its neck to prevent it from moving again, it tried to open its mouth to snap at my head, but could not reach me, it could however, reach my arm, and grabbed my wrist. I shouted in pain and used my other arm to keep its mouth from clamping down and causing any serious damage.

“Bring the knife above its head!” I boomed.

Rarity did so, and levitated the knife to the centre of its head. I quickly used my free hand to punch the croc in the eye, causing it to let go of my wrist, and I grabbed the sides of its head as I used all my might to roll the creature over. Luckily, the crocodile tried to roll again, and went with me onto its back, where the knife was pushed into its head. I put my hands on the underside of its head and pushed down with all my weight, causing the knife to go deep into its brain, and kill it.

I rolled off the creature and flopped onto my back, panting with exhaustion.

“I… Hate… Crocodiles…” I puffed.

As soon as the croc had stopped twitching, Fluttershy rushed to my side and checked me over for injury.

“Are you okay?” She asked, full of worry.

Tears were streaming down her face; she had honestly thought I was going to die.

“I’m fine; the bite’s not that bad.” I said, looking at my wrist to find blood oozing out of the bite holes.

Regardless of the blood, they weren’t actually that deep, a touch of Kuphilla Amanzi and I’d be right as rain. I finally sat up to see the other looking at me in awe.

“You’re a legend…” Dash said.

“You took care of that croc like a farm-colt takes care of a raging bull at a country show!” Applejack cheered.

I chuckled and picked up the orb shard, wiping off the mud and giving it a proper look. The shard was beautiful, it was translucent with a dark navy blue colouring, but as I turned it around in the light it also had shades of a lighter blue and a deep purple.

“It’s beautiful…” I mumbled.

“Finally… The first shard…” Twilight said, walking towards me.

I turned to face her, instantly recalling her cruel act with the clone.

“Give it to me.” She commanded.

I glared at her, carefully think about how to respond to her, along with thinking about how I’d just watched myself being torn apart by crocodiles, feeling pain, when no pain had to be felt…

“Don’t look at me like that, give me the shard.” She ordered.

I handed out the shard, and let her take it with her magic; she stared at it, taking in its beauty.

That was when I punched her in the face…

Chapter Twenty One: Lest Not Abhor

Chapter Twenty One - There and Back Again

I put a hand on Twilight’s upper chest and forced her up against the tree beside us.

“I know what you did you bitch!” I growled viscously.

“Callum! What the hay’s wrong with you!?” Applejack exclaimed as she ran towards me.

“I didn’t do anything!” Twilight yelped in fear.

“Liar!” I boomed.

It was then when Applejack stood between me and Twilight and pushed my arm away, releasing Twilight.

“What in tarnation is going on here!?” She demanded.

“He attacked me for no reason!” Twilight whimpered.

“She made the clone feel pain, and I want that filthy little mouth to admit it!” I spat, pointing a finger at Twilight.

“I did no such thing!” She shouted back.

Besides Applejack, the rest of the group stood around us and simply watched, unsure of who to believe.

“You call me a monster, when you created a clone with feelings!” I growled.

“That’s not true!”

I stood back and looked to the others.

“Did you not hear his screams?” I asked openly.

“Yeah, we did.” Rainbow Dash agreed, now glaring at Twilight.

“Care to explain?” Applejack the purple unicorn.

“It was a trick to attract more crocodiles.” She told us, nervous.

“You LIAR! I know myself Twilight! I heard the terror in his voice! Those screams were REAL!”I roared.

“Stop trying to turn my friends against me Callum! It won’t work!” She spat.

“This isn’t between me and your friends Twilight, this is between me and you!” I growled back.

Twilight’s horn began to glow, and she gritted her teeth.

“I’m not afraid of you human…”

“You think my species makes me evil? Hm? Is that your problem!? My species!?” I yelled.

“Well done! The penny drops, you stupid creature!”

“Why don’t you say that to my face, not from behind your friend!” I retorted.

“Is that a threat?”

“Come here and find out!” I growled.

Twilight’s horn glowed brighter.

“Get out of my way Applejack.” She said.

“Guys, calm down…” Applejack pleaded in response.

“It’s time to teach this animal a lesson…” Twilight snarled.

“He’s not an animal…” Fluttershy tried to put in.

“Shut up!” Twilight barked.

Fluttershy’s eyes filled with tears in mere seconds.

“Some friend you are!” I taunted.

“Applejack, move, now.”

“Sugarcube, we don’t need to be like this.”

“Move Applejack!”

Applejack sighed and walked back.

“Twilight, for goodness sake, please don’t kill the boy.” Rarity said, rolling her eyes.

“You think this is a joke!?” Twilight spat.

“No, I just think this hostility is pathetic. One of you two is lying, so whoever it is needs to grow up and admit the truth.” Rarity told us both.

“You think this animal has the mental ability to grow up?”

As Twilight insulted me to Rarity, I crept up on her without her knowing; I said nothing and simply waited for her to turn around.

Eventually she did turn and quickly jumped in shock, before she growled and started to charge up her horn.
Before she could cast her spell on me, I lunged forward and grabbed her horn tightly before squeezing it, hard. This caused her to scream in pain and dispel her magic, likewise, I growled in pain as her horn was boiling hot. I let go of her horn and simply pushed her shoulder with my other hand, she fell down like a sack of potatoes before putting her hooves over her head to clutch her horn, which was evidently in a LOT of pain now.

“Dude… What did you just do?” Dash breathed.

I knelt beside Twilight and grabbed her wrist.

“Tell them the truth.”

She ignored me and continued to writhe in pain.

“Tell them the truth!” I boomed.

“ALRIGHT! I MADE HIM FEEL PAIN! I LIED ABOUT! I MADE HIM SUFFER ON PURPOSE!” She screamed at the top of her lungs, wailing like a banshee, tears streaming down her face.

I let go of her wrist and left her to get over the pain.

“And she says I’m the monster…” I grunted in frustration, walking back towards the lake and the dead crocodile.

I picked up the orb shard on the way, if the group wanted to progress in the mission, they would need to force Twilight to make amends with me. I wanted an apology, and damn sincere one.
I sat down on the belly of the dead croc and looked at my hand, my whole right palm had been slightly burned by Twilight’s horn; the whole inner hand was red and throbbed painfully.

“What made you what you are…?” I mumbled in regards to Twilight.

I didn’t want this; I didn’t want this at all… Ironically, Twilight was once my favourite pony, but now, she was nothing to me but a monster…
I had to get to the bottom of this…

{“You think my species makes me evil? Hm? Is that your problem!? My species!?”
“Well done! The penny drops, you stupid creature!”}

Those words whizzed around in my head. She hated what I was. Not just who…
Princess Celestia was definitely at the bottom of this, and whatever she’d done, it was in regards to the human race as a whole, not just me personally.

“Hey.” A southern accented voice said behind me.

“Here to have a go at me Applejack?” I sighed.

“I’m here to owe you an apology Sugarcube…”

“What?”

“Sorry darl, but I’ve doubted you a little from the start. You seem nice, you seem all fine and dandy, but Twilight’s attitude to you made me think she’s onto something. Today you proved that you ain’t a monster.” She told me.

I stood up and turned around to face her.

“Thank you, and I’m sorry too…”

“What for?”

“For Twilight, I’m sorry that your best friend is changing for the worse.” I mumbled sympathetically.

“It’s not your apology to make Sugarcube…”

Applejack turned around and walked back to the group, I picked up my trousers and shirt, got dressed, and then followed her, now calm and collective.

“I see you got dressed.” Rainbow Dash pointed out.

“What told you?” I teased.

Rarity was further back, whispering into Twilight’s ear, and then nudging her forward. The purple unicorn walked up to me before looking at the ground.

“I’m sorry…”

“What was that?” I asked.

“I’m sorry…”

“I can’t hear you.”

“I said I’m sorry…”

“Twilight, say it.” Rarity commanded.

“I’m sorry.” Twilight grunted.

{How quaint, a forced apology…} I thought to myself before speaking.

“Firstly, I know you’re not,” I said flatly, “secondly, even if you were sorry, I wouldn’t forgive you for all the things you’ve put me through…”

“What things have I put you through exactly?” She snorted.

“Only too much… You’ve insulted me and put me down since we met, you re-gained your magic during Ingeo’s capture and chose not to assist me when I could have been killed! You punched me in the face on the first day we met for crying out loud! You made my clone back there on the lake feel pain when you had the choice not to!
And worst of all… You ordered me to kill an innocent person…” I snarled, bearing my teeth.

Upon mentioning the last event, tears formed in my eyes, I had done something unspeakable and worthy of undying hatred, I had become a murderer…

“Oh please, that was an act, you stupid animal.” She spat.

“What?”

“That man on the bridge was a fake. I replicated his DNA from a worker at the airport when we first got off the plane.” She explained.

“I… Wh-what?” I stuttered.

“I wanted to test you, to see if you were really as evil as I’ve been informed. I wanted to see if you really were capable of murder, and you delivered just as I expected you would.” She told me.

“Wait… You’re saying the guy on the bridge-”

“Was a clone. Yes.” Twilight butted in, answering my question.

“I… I don’t unders-”

“Of course you wouldn’t understand, you’re simple, you’re dim-witted. But yes, that human on the bridge was a clone. Did you not notice his clothing?”

Looking back, his clothes looked like labour work clothes, but I didn’t stop to think about that.
If what Twilight was telling me was true, this could change everything… I wasn’t a murderer…

“Why?” I demanded.

“I wanted to test you.”

“Do you have any idea how traumatic it was?” I questioned her, choking up as I asked.

“Do you have any idea how much I don’t care? You’re a human, you are evil, your feelings are worth nothing; you have no sentimental value to me. You’re only here to help us find the orb shards, and that is all you’ll ever be, a tool.” She said coldly.

“So the man I killed was not real?” I asked again to clarity.

“Yes! You dim-wit, I’ve said that about three times now!” She groaned.

“So I’m not a murderer?”

“I guess not, no. But I’m sure you will be one day, like the majority of your species.” She sighed.

I didn’t even care about Twilight’s vile attitude, not anymore. I was free of the burden that’s haunted me for weeks on end! I wasn’t a murderer! He was fake! He was just a clone!

“But Twilight, I thought you ran out of magic…?” Rainbow Dash spoke up.

“Yes, I did, but only after that spell. I told a justified lie in order to save my magic for that very moment, like all evil creatures, he needed to be tested for his worth.” She answered.

“Stop saying he’s evil, he’s not.” Pinkie said to Twilight, looking kind of sad for once.

“And how do you know that?”

“Because my Pinkie sense says he’s all clear, and on top of that, he’s smiley!” She said with a sweet smile.

“Just like your Pinkie sense said Princess Cadence was all clear, when she was Queen Chrysalis in disguise?” She rhetorically asked, leaning forward to her.

“Uhm, that… That was different, she was using a spell!”

“What makes you think he, isn’t using a spell?”

“I have no magic, smart-ass.” I said jokily.

“Will you both stop bickering like fillies on their first heat!?” Rarity scolded us.

The both of us shut up instantly.

“Focus on what’s actually important here, we have the first shard!” She continued to say.

I looked to the shard lying on the ground, Rarity was right, we needed to focus on the mission.

“So, now we have this shard, what happens now?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Well I'll put this shard in my bag. Thanks to the enchantments, the next time I use the my tracking spell, it'll start tracing the second closest shard. We'll repeat the same process until all six shards are found.” Twilight explained.

“But don’t we need to be near the airport to get a good bearing?” I asked.

“Not any more, we have the first shard now, so I can just use the essence it carries to track the next one.” She told us.

“Fair enough…” I mumbled.

“What about the distance? What if it’s far away and we can’t get a plane over there?” I quizzed.

The group hummed, Twilight scratched her chin with a hoof, before Pinkie jumped up.

“Why doesn’t Twiley teleport there on her own because she’s got super strong magic, then wait for it to re-charge, then create a portal from her location to ours!” She squealed in delight.

The group fell silent.

{You're a genius…} I thought to myself.

“No I’m not! I’m a pony!” She giggled.

My mouth fell agape.

“Pinkie, nopony said anything.” Fluttershy said.

“Not out loud, no.” She agreed, before curling up into a ball and rolling backwards away from us.

“What is wrong with her…?” Rarity sighed with a warm smile.

I stayed quiet, still unsure of Pinkie’s mind reading ability.

“So, what about Callum’s phone thing? Can we use that to help find the next shard?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Yes, that can be of some help, I could combine the spell with the phone's enchantment to teleport myself closer to the area, meaning we’ll have less travel time.” Twilight answered.

“So, if you’re going to teleport there, how long will you be and what do we do in the meanwhile?” Rarity quizzed.

“Depending on the distance, I could be from a few days to a week, just find a safe location to stay I guess?” Twi shrugged.

“Not here in Brazil, it’s far too dangerous.” I said.

“What do you suggest then? Go back to England?” Twilight growled.

There was a small moment of silence, before Fluttershy spoke.

“That’s actually a pretty good idea…”

“Come to think of it, if a plane takes us back to Gatwick, we’ll be near my house again, we can stay somewhere at the back of my land, then we’ll be safe and hidden while you get to the next shard.” I pointed out.

“So you’re saying we need to go all the way back to the airport here in Brazil, and find a plane to England again?” Dash said, already knowing the answer.

“Along with hacking the flight tower again?” Twilight also asked.

“Pretty much…” I sighed.

The whole group moaned in frustration, Rarity kneaded the dirt with her hooves and Rainbow Dash flopped onto her side with annoyance.

“Come on guys. I know it'll take a while, but after we get back to England things will speed up, we’ll be able to get the shards a lot quicker than it took to find this one.” I reassured.

“How much time would it cut off?” Dash asked.

“Well, now we have the first shard, it should take at least a month off each shard, depending on where they are.”

“Thank sugary sweetie drops! Here I was, thinking it would take another whole twenty chapters just to find the next one!” Pinkie said with glee, wiping her forehead.

“What?” I quizzed.

“I mean, come on! What was he thinking? Putting all the walking and talking into the book, we’re done with all the boring filler chapters! We need action and more soppy emotional scenes! Add some more character development! Maybe some romance? And for Celestia’s sake, please get us out of Brazil by chapter twenty two!” She continued to shriek to herself like a nutcase.

“Pinkie, what the hell are you talking about?” I asked in utter shock and confusion.

“Oh, never mind.” Pinkie giggled and bounced away.

“She’s so random…” Dash stated.

“I don’t like it! I don’t like it!” Blu squawked.

“It’s about time you said something, you’ve been quiet for ages.” I said to the bird.

“Happy watching, happy watching.” He said as he fluttered over and onto my shoulder.

“If you crap on me, I will eat you.” I warned him.

“There’s a thing called manners, I have ‘em! I have ‘em!”

“Good.” I smirked.

“Are we going then?” Applejack asked.

“I need to eat first, I’m starving.” I replied.

“I’m with Callum, we need a rest.” Dash agreed.

Rarity took off her saddlebag, as did the others.

“We’ll stay here for about an hour or two to rest, then we move.” Twilight informed us.

“Got it.” Dash said as she opened her saddlebag in search of food.

Rarity levitated the plastic bag of croc meat to me, along with the tail.

“Anything you need to prepare this?” She asked.

“A fire, and a spit.” I replied.

“Oh wonderful! I was hoping we could use that again!” Rarity said with delight as she went to open her bag for a second time.

“Again?” I asked.

“Well, when we first came here we used it to hang a pot from and made butternut squash soup.” She told me.

“Mmnn… Butternut squash soup…” I mumbled, almost drooling.

It was a common fact that butternut squash was one of my favourite soups, that, and potato and leek.

Rarity’s bag expanded for a moment as she levitated out a four legged spit, luckily it could be readjusted to put two roasting sticks through the middle.

“Twilight dear, could you make a fireplace for us?” Rarity asked.

Twilight merely nodded and used her magic to make a small pit in the ground and then shoot a fireball into the middle, where a large flame formed.

“Flamey! Flamey!” Blu squawked as he flew off my shoulder and went to a nearby tree branch.

“I love magic…” I mumbled to myself.

I went to the nearest tree and broke off two straight branches to skewer the meat with. I came back to the group to find they were all watching me.

“What…?”

“Nothing.” Rainbow Dash lied.

“Seriously guys why are you all watching me?”

“We just want to watch you prepare the meat.” Fluttershy said.

“Why?”

“Because it’s interesting, watching you like this,” Rarity began, “you seemed so happy and comfortable with your life at home, you had a relatively comfortable life in England; you just had to go downstairs just to get food. Then we came along and took you out of that environment, and you developed to become a survivor in mere days, you’re displaying old hunter-gatherer traits. It’s just really interesting seeing how quickly you humans can adapt to new things.” She explained.

“Huh, I never looked at it that way, I just wanted to spit roast some croc meat.” I shrugged and went to the spit.

“You’re too modest dear…”

“I’m just getting by, there’s no modesty about it. I’m doing what needs to be done, that doesn’t require admiration.” I replied.

“Again… Too modest…”

I shrugged and took the crocodile meat before skewering the muscle along. I repeated this on the other stick until all the meat was gone, I left the tail just in case I didn’t eat it, there was a lot of meat there already without it. I put the sticks into the mounts and lowered it about two or three inches above the flame, and sat back.

“Now, we wait.” I sighed…

After a good half hour of letting the meat cook, occasionally turning the stick to cook both sides equally, the meat was ready, the outside was browned, but not too crispy, it was perfection…

“Oma-nom-nom…” I growled hungrily as I stared at the meat.

“It’s done?” Dash asked.

“Eeyup.” I grinned.

“It looks… Well, actually kind of nice…” She said quietly.

“Yeah, I don’t think eating it would do you any favours, your body would reject it pretty fast.” I said with a small chuckle.

“I never said I wanted to try it!” She spat.

“Yeah, but you thought it.” I teased.

She responded by sticking her tongue out, I chuckled again before taking one of the sticks off the spit.

“Croc’a doodle doo!” Blu squawked

I raised an eyebrow at the bird, who put his head on one side.

“What?”

“You, that’s what.” I answered.

“Don’t eat me! Don’t eat me!” He cawed jokily as he flew over to Fluttershy and landed on her shoulder.

I rolled my eyes and looked back to the meat, still steaming and juicy.

“Nom…” I mumbled.

I leant forward and took the first bite of any meat I’d eaten since I’d met the six, and holy… Fucking… Shit…

“I take it you like it?” Rarity asked, poking me.

That’s when I realised I had completely zoned out from what can only be described as a food-gasm, I had closed my eyes and sort of forgot who I was and where I was, regardless, I ignored the others and their odd looks, the croc meat was absolutely perfect, I hummed in delight before kissing the food.

“Oh meat, how I missed you… Oh I am never letting you out of my life again!” I cried.

“Dude, are you getting emotional over food?” Dash asked.

“Rainbow Dash, this experience to me, is like Pinkie without her cake…” I choked up, a tear forming in my eye.

“Life without cake! Dear sweet Celestia no!” Pinkie wailed.

“Now that’s true love right there…” Applejack chuckled.

I grinned as I took another bite, and another, and another…
And another…

And another…

I had ploughed through both sticks, and was still hungry.

“You were hungry weren’t you?” Applejack giggled.

“I still am.” I growled as I licked my chops.

“Tail?” Rarity asked.

I looked at the large meaty crocodile tail, then back to the stick, and then back to Rarity.

“Tail.”

And on the spit it went…

Cooked, salted, and all ready to eat, I savagely ripped into the delicious meat, completely forgetting the ponies were watching as my lust for meat took over, I had gone for too long without eating a decent meal, let alone the warm juicy meat I craved, any other person in my shoes would understand…
I ate and ate and ate, until there was nothing left but the tail bone and the tough, tasteless cartilage that surrounded it. I dropped the bone by my side and flopped onto the ground, moaning in pleasure.

“You okay?” Dash asked.

“Mhmm…”

“Hey guys, check it out, Callum’s slipped into a food coma!” She laughed.

The others all joined in on the laughter, finding the whole situation amusing.

“I can’t believe you ate that much, you eat more than me!” Pinkie squeaked.

“Murr…”

“With an appetite like that, you could probably beat me at a pie eating contest at my rodeos!” Applejack told me, chuckling as she prodded my arm.

“Burr…”

“Please tell me you’re not going to throw up.” Rarity said, full of worry.

“Murble burble burr…”

“Food comas are funny.” Pinkie said dreamily.

Dash walked up to me and prodded my belly, causing a wrenching pain through my gut, I groaned in pain and rolled onto my side.

"Ooowww..." I moaned, sounding similar to a cow in labour.

“What was that for?” Pinkie demanded.

“To see if he’d puke or not.” She giggled back.

“That’s not very nice Dashie…”

“It was a joke Pinks.”

My vision was then taken over by a grumpy purple face.

“We need to move, get up.” Twilight ordered.

“I need a moment…” I replied, rubbing my tummy.

“Now.”

“Really, I need a moment.”

“We cannot stay here.”

“Murr…”

“Get… Up… Now…”

I moaned as I rolled to my side and tried to get up, only to sit cross legged.

“You’re pathetic.” Twilight scowled.

“Do you want me to grab your horn again?” I growled.

Twilight took a step back and looked afraid, only for Rainbow Dash to scream with laughter and fall to the ground in tears of uncontrollable bellowing.

“GRAB… GRAB YOUR HORN… GRAB YOUR HORN AGAIN!!!” She squealed as she rolled around.

“Wow…” I mumbled.

I looked at Twilight with a dull, un-amused look, only for her to look at me with the same look, and for the first time we had a proper agreement together…
Rainbow Dash was a dirty minded sex pest…

“Righty ho… Let’s get moving.” I said after a good few minutes of recovering from my food coma.

Rainbow Dash had calmed herself now, and we were all getting ready to leave, Rarity had packed up the spit and the unappetising scraps of bone and cartilage had been thrown into the lake for the other crocodiles to engage in some sweet, sweet cannibalism.
I was just about to start walking when I felt something hard poke my back, I turned around to see Vladimir’s knife floating in front of me. Just ahead of that, was Twilight, her horn glowing.

“You forgot this.”

“Why do you care?” I questioned.

“When we were at your house on the first day, I remember one of your history books about medieval times; it mentioned that the best fighters carried signature weapons, which they gave names. Being a fighter, I assumed it would be in your interest to keep this and give it a name.” She told me.

I was slightly confused at this point, I wasn’t sure if Twilight was making an effort to be nice here, or if she was just emphasising I was a killer to make me feel bad. Either way, I took the knife and nodded my thanks.

“Right, let’s get moving.” I commanded.

The group looked to Twilight to see if she had any objections, and raised my eyebrow at her.

“What he said…” She muttered.

“Uhm… How do we find our way back to the airport?” Dash asked.

“My maps app.” I pointed out.

Rainbow Dash raised her eyebrows and nodded, before having another good question.

“How do we get back though, without being seen, and it taking forever?”

“Good point…” I mumbled.

“Speed boat! Speed Boat! Drive along the coast!” Blu squawked.

I looked at the bird with my eyebrows upraised.

“We’re in the middle of the jungle, how are we going to find a speedboat?” I scoffed.

“River south! Right to the docks! QUARK!”

“How do you know?” I asked, tilting my head on one side.

“Been here for years, been all over the place! Caark!” He replied calmly.

“Fair enough.” I shrugged.

It seemed Blu could be a lot of use to the group, with Rainbow Dash’s wings in their condition, Blu was the only one who can properly fly, as Fluttershy’s flying ability was obviously very poor, not to mention she’d be spotted by other people.

“Hey Blu?” I began.

The bird hopped onto Fluttershy’s head and looked at me.

“Myeeaass…?”

“Do you want to join us on our adventure?”

The bird jumped from Fluttershy and flew in circles around me, before landing on my shoulder.

“Thought you’d never ask!” He squawked.

I chuckled, before tightening my bag straps.

“Well, south it is!” I said merrily before getting out my phone.

I opened up my Maps app and found the river Blu was hinting to, it was completely straight and led directly to the coast, it was quite a long walk, but it wasn’t complicated. I locked my phone and began walking, the group all stretched before joining me.

{Great, more damn walking…} I thought to myself.

A good few hours later, the jungle became a lot less dense as we approached the coastline. It wouldn’t be far until we reached the docks Blu mentioned, along with finding a speedboat, we’d be at the airport within the next few hours if we were lucky.

“My hooves hurt…” Pinkie moaned.

“My hooves hurt…” Rainbow Dash copied, mimicking Pinkie’s high pitched nasally squeak.

“My hooves hurt! My hooves hurt!” Blu squawked to mock the both of them.

“Are we there yet? We’ve been walking for miles.” Rarity asked.

I had been tracking our location on my phone on multiple occasions during the walk; we were no more than half a mile from the dock.

“We’re very close, don’t worry.” I assured her.

Just as I had said that, I turned back around to find we’d come to the edge of the jungle, and beyond that was a small dock.

“Well, the bird wasn’t lying.” I announced as I spotted a pale blue speedboat in the water.

“What if there are people there?” Dash asked cautiously.

“I’ll go and check it out.” I said, gesturing for the group to stay put.

I left the cover of the jungle and walked towards the dock, the soft spongy ground become harder as the dirt became gravel, my quiet footsteps become slightly louder as each step made a crunch, rather than a small rustle.
As I approached the docks I found two men, one was very old and had a large white goatee, the other looked in his twenties, he had slicked back hair and a small, thin moustache that made him look like an Italian pornstar.
After all the stuff that’d gone on lately with Ingeo and the crocs, I was in no mood for stealth.

“Mentlegen.” I spoke aloud as I walked forward.

They turned at the same time, the old man looked calm and careless towards my approach, while the younger man instantly saw me as a foe.

“Quién es usted? Sal de aquí niño!” He yelled at me.

I kept walking towards him, tensing my muscles and prepared myself to strike.

“Estás sordo? Dejar!” He shouted.

I ignored him and came closer still, this was when he clenched his fists and stormed towards me, gritting his teeth.

“Come on… Come on, come on, come on…” I muttered under my breath.

He started speed walking towards me before he finally approached me and instantly tried to swing his arm at me to hit me, I quickly ducked beneath it and thrust upwards with all of my body, my fist made contact with his jaw and I heard a small snap as his head shot backwards and his body jolted from the unexpected counter-attack. He was out like a light and fell onto his back, unconscious.

“Nyeeaaah!!!” The old man yelled as he waddled towards the shed beside him.

I ran towards him, making sure he didn’t get away.
He went around the corner and I followed quickly, just as I was about to reach the corner he came back around with a double barrelled shotgun and aimed it at me. Without thinking I dived to the side and rolled out of the way as the gun went off near my head, a sharp pain went into my left ear and it started ringing. I shook my head and turned to face the old man who was turning to me, about to take his second shot. I rushed towards him and grabbed the barrel and main body of the gun, yanked it from his arms, and smacked him in the side of the head with the stock. Just as quickly as the first, he was unconscious and fell back into a heap on the ground. I dropped to my knees and put the gun down on the ground before putting a hand to my left ear, it was ringing and hurt like a bitch. I was like the pressure of going in an aeroplane, but on a much stronger level.

I stood up again and walked back to the younger man, where I was in eye-shot of the ponies. I put up my hand and waved to signal them over. I quickly saw all six of them leave the jungle and trot towards me.

“Dude, you're a ninja!” Rainbow Dash cheered.

I smirked, proud of myself.

“I heard a gunshot, are you hurt?” Rarity asked.

“No, my ear just aches a little; it went off by my head.” I answered, rubbing my ear.

“Oh dear…” She mumbled, unsure of what to do.

“I’ll be fine, it’ll wear off.” I said, shaking my head slowly in attempt to stop the ringing.

“I said you’d turn out to be a murderer soon enough.” Twilight spat.

“Calm your purple titties Twilight, they’re just unconscious. Besides, one tried to hit me, and the other tried to shoot me.” I retorted.

“Whatever.” She growled.

“Speedboat! Speedboat!” Blu squawked as he flew to the boat at the end of the dock.

{No doubt it belonged to the young guy with the porno’tashe.} I thought.

“Who were these people?” Applejack asked, looking at the unconscious man.

“No idea.” I said, rolling him over with a foot.

On his back was a symbol, there was a white circle and in the middle was a black shape, it looked a lot like a spider, but also quite like a hand.
I shrugged it off and looked to the shed.

“I’m just going to have a look in there, then we can be off.” I said.

They nodded and I went into the shed in search of ammunition for the old man’s shotgun while Blu was able to locate the keys to the speedboat in the younger man's pocket.

Inside the shed was a large boat, surprise, surprise. I looked inside it but found nothing, in the far corner of the shed was a large cardboard box, it looked rather promising so I jumped down from the boat and gave it a looksee.

“G’day g’day sexy…” I mumbled with a large grin as I opened up the box to find it stacked with shotgun cartridges.

I opened up my rucksack and put them all inside before zipping it up and slinging it back over my shoulders. I then left the shed and picked up the old man’s shotgun, which was now mine.

“I will call you… Wrinkleboom.” I grinned as I stroked the gun’s barrel.

“Wrinkleboom?” Dash asked.

“Wrinkleboom.” I replied.

“Why Wrinkleboom?”

“Why not Wrinkleboom?”

“Stop saying Wrinkleboom!” Rarity demanded.

“Why should we stop saying Wrinkleboom?” I asked teasingly, smirking.

“Because it’s reeaally annoying…” She answered, frowning.

“Very well…” I sighed playfully, stroking Wrinkleboom’s barrel once more.

I looked around and put my hands on my hips, before looking over to the speedboat.

“Alright ladies, let’s not stand on ceremony here, let’s get ourselves back to England!” I cheered.

The group cheered and whinnied in agreement and joy, and we all headed down the dock to the boat.

“She’s a beauty!” I exclaimed as I stepped into the boat.

The others joined without saying a word and all sat down where they could.

“Do you know how to drive one of these things right?” Rainbow Dash asked me with an uncertain look.

“I prefer the term, 'learning on the job'…” I chuckled as I pulled the rev-cord to start the engine.

A few pulls later, the engine started rumbling and we were good to go.

I started up the propeller and turned the rudder so we would face outwards from the bank. The boat slowly turned out from the dock and began to enter the ocean, where I turned up the speed and we began to zoom off.

“Yeehaw!” Applejack shouted.

“Yo! Ho! Ho! A pirate’s life for me!” I sang merrily to myself as we headed back to the airport.

Back… To home…

Chapter Twenty-Three: Familiar Faces

Chapter Twenty Three - Familiar Faces

“Oliver?” I said in disbelief.

“Hey fag.” He bluntly replied, smirking slightly.

I looked at him, and he looked at me, along with the ponies, he looked back and forth from me to them.

“Not really sure what to ask first; how you’re still alive? Or why you’re surrounded with brightly coloured talking horses.” He said, almost to himself than to me.

“Well, for either subject, you can’t tell anyone.” I told him.

“And why’s that? I’m sure I’d win the Nobel bloody Prize if I handed in one of these things to the science department, I’d be all over the news and everything!” He grinned, fantasising about the idea.

“You’re right… You’d probably be world famous…” I agreed.

“So, what’s in it for me if I don’t tell anyone?” He asked.

“Firstly, you get to personally indulge on one of the biggest events in human history, aliens visiting us.
Secondly, your brain gets left intact, because we’d have to remove your memory if you don’t agree.”

He folded his arms and frowned, biting his lip as he thought about the offer.

“Can I tell my mates at least?”

“No.”

“Gay.” He grunted.

“So, do you promise not to tell?” I asked him, tilting my head on one side and raising an eyebrow.

“Uh, fine…” He snorted.

I sighed a breath of relief; it seemed my brother may actually have a few decent brain cells after all…

“So, how come’s you’re still alive? When I got back from Andrew’s, I happened to notice a dead twat in the kitchen with a knife in his guts and a fuck load of policemen. Bloody bastards put me forward as one of the suspected killers! The cheek! Look at me! I couldn’t hurt a fly!” He ranted.

“Oliver, I watched you stab a fox to death once.” I pointed out.

“That was different, the fox was killing the chickens, I was being a hero!” He retorted, pulling a dramatic pose.

“Right…” I said flatly.

“So, how are you still alive?” He quizzed, scratching his chin.

“Well, I kinda didn’t die in the first place, I faked it.” I answered.

“What about the body? And the whole house being blown to shit?”

“Well, these ponies-”

“Faggot horses.” He interrupted.

“These faggot horses, have the ability to use magic, the body you found was a clone.” I explained.

“You can clone? Sweet! Now you can literally go fuck yourself!” He grinned.

Applejack and Rainbow Dash couldn’t help but laugh from behind me.

“Anyway, I killed the clone and then smashed the house up to make it look like a break-in.” I continued.

“You duffed up the house?” He exclaimed.

“I did!” I grinned.

“Now, that would be an interesting tale to tell mother… Her reaction would be legendary!” He teased.

Rainbow Dash was the first one with enough courage to talk to my brother, and came up beside me.

“Look dude, if you keep your trap shut, we’re cool. If you try to tell anyone, I’ll break your jaw.” She growled.

I looked at Rainbow Dash in absolute shock, Oliver on the other hand, laughed.

“I like this one already.”

We seemed to be getting nowhere, so I changed the subject.

“What’s the news at home? How’s mum and stuff?” I asked.

“Home’s fine, you actually did us a favour by dying and having the house smashed up. We had to spend so much money in repairing the house that she couldn’t afford alcohol for weeks and ended up not drinking at all!” My brother happily answered.

“Standard…” I mumbled.

“It gets better…”

I raised an eyebrow.

“So, as you know, Her Ladyship goes to play bingo every Saturday, am I right? Of course I’m right!
Anyway, she took a chance, and threw all her money at a four board game.
The bitch won full house on all of them! She won like, ten times as much money as we had to start with! We’ve been gorging on curries and kebabs ever since! It’s a miracle! You need to die more often!”

I chuckled slightly, my brother was actually rather amusing, it seemed my death had brought luck to the family, they were happier and much better off.

“So anyway, she’s gone on holiday for a while, so it’s just me, myself, and I. Do you and your gayliens want to come in?” He offered, bowing like a humble host.

I looked to my friends and shrugged, Applejack and Rarity nodded in response.

“Very well, we’d love to come in.” I answered.

I tightened the straps on my rucksack and walked towards my brother, who turned around and walked down the garden path beside him, the ponies in tow.

“So, why aren’t you freaked out by the talking ponies exactly?” I asked, awfully curious at my brother’s calmness.

“Because nothing freaks me out, besides they don’t look all that scary. Alright, they’re weird as shit and have big fuck-off anime eyes, but besides that, they’re nothing but talking horses.” He replied.

“And, a talking horse doesn’t bother you, why?” I asked.

“Why should it? I always thought a talking animal would be cool…” He said.

“Right…” I mumbled with confusion.

“Look bro, it’s simple. I just don’t care. They’re weird, but you’re also weird and I put up with you for sixteen years, their species isn’t that big a deal to me, I always knew aliens would visit one day.” He chuckled.

{Of all the people to support species equality…} I thought to myself in amusement.

We came to the house and Oliver opened the back door, before taking another humble bow and beckoning us in with a wave of his arm.

“Please do, come in…” He cooed with a devious grin upon his face.

I came into my old house an instantly familiarised myself with the place again, the kitchen looked exactly the same, minus the microwave. I chuckled as I remembered the day we smashed up the house, when Applejack screamed ‘watermelon’ and head-butted the bloody thing.

“So what do you things eat?” Oliver asked bluntly to Rarity.

“We’re not things, sir, we’re ponies.” She replied.

“Pretty weird looking ones…” He snorted.

“Now, now… There’s no need for rudeness.” Rarity muttered defiantly.

“If you don’t like how I talk, you can go back outside.” Oliver grunted.

“I just mean that-”

“Look white horse thing, I’m offering you food, I’m at least half nice. Do you want food or not?” He interrupted.

“Um, yes, please.” She backed down.

Oliver smiled and went to the fridge, then changed his mind and went to get a bowl.

“I assume you’re veggies, I can make a mean salad…” He told us, puffing his chest out.

“A salad would be lovely, thank you, mister…?”

“Oliver.”

“Oliver, thank you.” Rarity smiled and dipped her head in respect.

I went to the fridge and passed him the vegetables as he pulled out a chopping board and a knife.

“Ooh! Do you have any-”

“No Pinkie, we’re out of cake.” I told her as I closed the fridge door.

“Aw…” She sighed.

“A sweet tooth I see. Give me a tickity boo, I can make cookie dough in like, half an hour.” Oliver grinned.

I raised an eyebrow in confusion. Why was my brother being so… Nice…?

“Do you gals want to head up to my room? I’ll bring the salad up when it’s done.” I told the six.

I looked at Rarity and raised my eyebrows, tilting my head slightly to indicate that I wanted to be alone with my brother for a while, Applejack noticed my gesture as well.

“Let’s go y’all, we’ll leave you two to catch up.” She said fondly.

The group headed upstairs and out of sight, which was when a fist collided with my arm and a blunt pain shot from my shoulder to my wrist, I had forgotten how hard Oliver could punch.

“What was that for?” I growled.

“Twatface... Why didn’t you tell me you were fucking off with a bunch of aliens?” He ordered to know.

“Why do you think? Dumb-arse, you’d have told someone.” I replied angrily.

“Dude, you don’t just fake your death and expect me to deal with it. Fucking arsehole.” He scowled, hitting me in the chest, thankfully not as hard.

“Why do you care? You’ve never given a shit about anything but yourself.” I spat back.

That’s when he grabbed me by my shoulders and took me entirely off-guard.

“Because I love you, you fucking retard! You may be a freak, but you’re still my fucking brother!” He shouted.

I looked at Oliver in disbelief, and it took a good ten seconds for the words to sink in.

“You… Love me?” I asked slowly.

“Yes, you twat.”

“You’re trying to say… You actually have feelings…?”

“Something like that, yeah.”

“So why have you treated me like a dick for the past damn decade?” I asked with my shoulders upraised.

“I was jealous.” He quietly grunted.

I stared at my brother, my facial expression becoming more and more contorted with confusion and shock.

“Look at you… You’re quirky, you’re outside the box, you always look on the bright side, you can sing, and you’re a boxer and a swimmer. You could easily become a comedian if you wanted to. I can’t be any of those things, alright, maybe I could be a boxer, but that’s only because I enjoy violence. I can’t sing, I can’t be all positive like you. You’re too… Well… Good!
And I’m not…
I’m a cynical, hot-headed dude who lives on the darker side of life. I know that, and I ain’t gonna change.
I knew you’d end up being top dog when dad left, so I had to beat you down, I had to stay on top, I had to. But when I found you’d been killed, I… I realised how much you really meant to me…” He explained.

I just continued to stare at my brother with disbelief, he was showing me a side to him that I’d only ever seen when I was young, when everything was all relaxed and happy; when we played PlayStation together and were the closest of brothers, when I was happy at home...
For the first time in forever, I finally understood why my brother was such an egotistical prick.
That was when he took me completely unaware, and hugged me.

“I’m sorry little bro…” He choked.

I hugged him back as tears filled my eyes.

“It’s okay big bro…”

“See what you’ve done? You’re in the house for less than ten minutes and your gayness is already rubbing off on me!” He laughed through his own tears.

The both of us laughed together and sorted ourselves out, respectfully not making eye-contact while the tears were wiped away.

“I’d better do that salad before your pets start complaining.” Oliver chuckled, reaching for the chopping board.

I held his wrist and looked him in the eyes, smiling.

“We’ll, do the salad.”

“Together?”

“Together.”

That’s when he slapped me in the face.

“If you ever say anything that gay again, I’ll kill you a second time over, and make sure you stay dead.”

I laughed and took the vegetables.

“I’ll make the salad, you make that cookie dough for Pinkie.” I told him.

“Pinkie? That’s her name?”

“Yup.”

“Her parents weren’t very creative, were they?” He chuckled.

The both of us laughed as I made the salad, and Oliver prepared the cookie dough. For once, the both of us were at peace. Which was when another subject came into mind.

“Hey bro?”

“Yes fag?”

“Did anyone talk about me? After I died?”

“Dunno, the Queen Mother didn’t, she just got pissed off about the home damage. I never talked with any of your mates, if you actually had any.” He answered, chuckling.

“Did I get a funeral?” I asked.

“Shit! I forgot about that. Yeah, you’ve got a funeral on Friday, it was delayed because nobody could cough up the money for it.” He replied, again, chuckling.

“What day is it today?”

Oliver copied one of my quirks and licked his index finger, before raising it into the air.

“It’s Tuesday.”

“Great whickering stallions… That’s three days from now!” I exclaimed with excitement.

“Yeah, you could turn up at your own funeral!” He joked, laughing.

That’s when we both looked at one another.

“Fuck yeah…” We both said in sync.

Oliver opened my bedroom door for me, as my hands were full with a tray, containing five bowls of salad and one bowl of cookie dough.

“Housekeeping!” I sang in a high pitched, feminine voice as I entered.

I almost dropped the tray when I entered the room.
Everything was gone…
My bed, my shelves, my dressing table, my laptop desk, all of it… Gone…
Nothing remained but my desk chair, the built in wardrobe with all my clothes, and the flat screen TV on the wall.

“Yeah, after you died mum sold a lot of your stuff.” Oliver told me.

I turned to look him with a face of shock and horror.

“They didn’t take my laptop did they?” I asked.

“You’re in luck there, I was allowed to keep some of your stuff, so I have your laptop safe and sound, and your Xbox.” He said to me with a warm smile.

“Thank god…” I sighed and put the tray down.

“Food!” The ponies all cried.

Oliver looked at me with an eyebrow upraised, as though to ask why they were so excited over food.

“We haven’t eaten much in a long time.” I explained to him.

“Why?”

“Food isn’t so easy to find when you’re in a cage.” Rainbow Dash said before face-planting into the bowl.

“What do you mean?”

“We were kinda kidnapped by a psychotic drug lord in Brazil.” I told him.

Oliver looked at me blankly, I rolled my eyes.

“Right, I guess I need to tell you the whole story.” I sighed.

“Ooh, can I tell him!?” Pinkie squeaked.

I looked at Pinkie, and then at Oliver, and then back to Pinkie, and then back to Oliver.

“Yes…” I agreed with a sick smile, “Yes you can…”

“And after Twilight teleported off, Rainbow Dash and Callum started wrestling, and that’s when you showed up and said ‘what-up faggots?’ I don’t know what that means, but I think it’s mean, so you were a big meanie! But anyway, you took us to the house and offered us salad, and I wanted cookie dough!” Pinkie rambled as she stuffed her face with cookie dough.

“Buh the way, thus tustes duluchious!” She shouted with her mouth full.

She swallowed.

“And, well, here we are! Two months, been and gone!”

To my sheer amazement, Oliver had been able to withstand a half hour, in-depth explanation of our journey.

“So let me get this straight, you’re going around the world to find pieces of a magic ball?” He asked.

I nodded at him, and he scratched his chin.

“Hang on a second… That means, that was you!” He shouted.

I tilted my head in confusion.

“It was on the news, Brazil’s most wanted criminal, Ingeo Montenegro, massive ass drug lord. There was reported gunfire and shit, the police turned up and found his compound. When they went in, like, everyone was dead. All of Ingeo’s men and a load of people from other countries and stuff.” Oliver told me.

“Did they find Ingeo?”

“Yeah, in a room with a big Russian bloke with-”

“A large fatal torso stab wound?” I interrupted.

“Oh my fucking god… You really were there…” He gasped.

“Aye, but he left me a mark to remember him.” I told him.

I unbuttoned the top of my shirt and showed him the massive scar on my chest, it was still healing and was more of a massive scab than a scar for the time being.

“Bloody hell…” He breathed.

“I was also shot in the leg three times, electrocuted, stabbed, force-fed razor blades, and had a handheld drill through the hand.” I added, showing him the mark on my hand.

“Dude!” Oliver exclaimed.

“Yeah, it’s been quite the adventure.” I said in a merry tone.

“Does your hand still work?”

I wiggled my thumb, index finger, and middle finger, the last two twitched, but didn't fully respond, they still had a few days of healing to do.

“How’d you heal so fast?” He asked.

“Kuphila amanzi!” I sang.

“I beg your fuckin’ what?”

“It’s some healing gel that basically speeds up your healing factor by at least ten times.” I told him.

“Where’s it come from?”

“A rhyming voodoo zebra.”

“What?” He said blankly.

I clicked my fingers, which was when Pinkie assaulted my brother.

“She’s an evil enchantress! And she does evil dances! And when you look her in the eye she’ll put you in trances! Then what will she do!? She’ll mix up an evil brew! And gobble you up in a big tasty stew!
Soooo… Watch out!”

My friends all laughed as my brother stared at Pinkie in horror, his eyes almost bulging out of their sockets.

“What… The actual f-”

“She’s from their world, and she’s like a witchdoctor and can make many different potions and brews using the plants from the forest she lives in. She made this Kuphila Amanzi for us.” I quickly explained.

“That’s pretty awesome.” He hummed, still weirded out by Pinkie.

I smiled and nodded.

“So, you’re the hero who killed the infamous Ingeo Montenegro…” My brother smirked.

I nodded and let out a grin at being called a hero.

“So what was it like? Killing a man?”

“Traumatic as fuck.”

“You seem alright.”

“It was a month ago.”

“True…” He hummed.

I looked to the others to see they had finished their salads, and Pinkie, her cookie dough. It was then when Oliver grabbed the rucksack still on my back.

“Hey, this is my rucksack you bastard!” He growled.

“Watch your profanity.” I said in an extremely high pitched voice.

“Shut your face and give it back, that cost me a lot of money!” He ordered.

“Oliver, if I be so bold to say, that backpack has had its money’s worth with the adventure its been on, there’s no need to be angry at Callum for taking it.” Rarity spoke up.

“It’s my bag, not his, he didn’t ask.” Oliver spat.

“There’s no need to be selfish over it.” Rarity stood her ground.

“My house, my rules.”

“Yours? Or your mother’s?” Rarity retorted.

{Oh snap…} I thought.

“Well, while she’s not here-”

“Do you earn the money for the household? Do you pay the bills and provide the food?” She interrupted.

“I’m looking for a j-”

“I own a house, and run a business. I pay my bills and keep the place tidy, and I don’t treat my little sister the way you treat your brother. Until today, you thought he was dead! I would have thought that backpack would be the very least of your concern.” She snapped.

We all fell entirely silent. Oliver was gobsmacked that someone had actually stood up to him for once, and we were all gobsmacked that there was actually someone with enough guts to stand up to him.

“You know, for a creepy looking talking horse with a penis on your forehead, you have a fair point.”

Oliver turned to me and put a hand on my shoulder.

“Sorry bro...”

I smiled happily and nudged my brother with a shoulder.

“It’s alright, I know you can’t help it. Being an arse is just in your DNA.” I teased.

“Damn right its in my DNA.” Oliver laughed in agreement.

He then turned to Rarity again, taking on a more hostile approach again.

“You know, besides my mother, you’re the first living creature to ever stand up to me like that.” He barked.

Rarity looked at my brother sternly, clearly nervous, yet valiant. It was then when Oliver bowed.

“I applaud you… Your non-existent balls are bigger than Callum’s.” He complimented.

That was when Applejack and Rainbow Dash burst into laughter, and I looked back at my brother with a frown.

“So, what are you lot going to do while you wait for Twinkie Sparky?” Oliver asked.

{I shall be calling her that from now on…} I thought to myself, chuckling.

“We honestly don’t know, we were going to just camp outside.” Rarity replied.

“Movie night! Movie night!” Pinkie squeaked.

Blu came out from Fluttershy’s mane and sat on Pinkie’s head.

“That’s the first decent thing that’s come out of your mouth! Caark!” He squawked.

“You have a parrot!?” Oliver exclaimed.

“Yeah, Fluttershy found him.” I answered.

“Polly want a cr-”

“If you want to keep your eyeballs I’d stop right there!” He screeched.

The entire group burst into laughter as I explained to my brother that Blu hated cracker jokes.

“Fascinating…” He mumbled, scratching his chin.

“Back on track, I think it would be great to watch some movies, I’m very interested in human culture.” Rarity said.

“But please, not another kid’s film…” Rainbow Dash moaned.

That’s when I had an idea.

“Right, how about we put on younger films on in my room, and more mature films in my brother’s room?” I suggested.

“Oh no, I’m not housing these things in my room.” Oliver growled.

“Come on bro, they’ll be good films. Snatch, Pulp Fiction, Hot Fuzz and stuff like that.” I pleaded.

“Fine…” He groaned.

“If we do that in the evening, what shall we do for the meanwhile?” Rarity asked.

My brother grinned, a sly smile, as though he had come up with something revolutionary.

“I have just the thing…” He breathed darkly.

“Headshot!” Rarity screeched as she got a lucky shot with the Barrett Fifty Cal.

“Damn it! I was only two kills from an AC-One-Thirty!” Oliver barked.

That’s when I hit Rarity in the back with a throwing knife and stole her care package.

“Don’t you dare!” She growled.

“Booyah! Chopper gunner!” I cried in delight.

From there, I annihilated the both of them and won the match.
Having spent twenty minutes of teaching Rarity how to play the Xbox, she turned out to be an absolute natural and had come second place in our free-for-all game of Modern Warfare Two, we had played three matches and Rarity had really gotten into it.

“I must say, I hadn’t expected virtual violence to be so… Entertaining!” She giggled.

“I hadn’t expected you of all ponies to enjoy it.” I chuckled.

“Likewise, but there’s just something so satisfying about it.” She hummed, still grinning.

“This is where I hate not having magic.” Rainbow Dash grumbled, wanting a turn.

“Why doesn’t Pearly just sync the controller to your body?” Oliver suggested.

“I beg your pardon?” Rarity asked.

“Well, think about it, your magic connected to the controller is just syncing your mind with the buttons you want to press. Why not do that with her? The controller is wireless to the Xbox, so just make a wireless connection between the controller and her brain as well?” He said.

The room went silent as everyone stared at my brother.

“That’s so crazy it might just work…” Rarity mumbled.

“You often forget that I got an A Star in Science.” Oliver gloated.

Rarity’s horn lit up and my controller glowed slightly, the glow then left the controller like a ball of foggy light and floated to Rainbow Dash and landed on her forehead and was absorbed into her brain.

“Whoa, that feels weird…” She breathed as she rubbed her temples.

“I bonded the spell with the controller’s battery, so your head will be synced with the controller until it’s turned off.” Rarity told her.

“Neat…” She giggled.

I let Rainbow Dash play with Oliver and Rarity and went over to Fluttershy, who was looking at my Derpy Hooves mouse-mat.

“You alright?” I asked her.

“Yes, thank you. I’m just thinking about how we’re famous in this world when we know absolutely nothing about your kind, it’s confusing how our world links with yours, but not the other way around.” She sighed.

I put an arm around the pegasus and smiled.

“You know, you’d be surprised how much our world links with yours…” I told her.

“What do you mean?” She asked.

“I think it’s time for a history lesson…” I grinned.

“Did someone say history?” Rarity asked, looked over my way.

I looked at her and smiled, and beckoned her over, she stood up and looked back to the screen to find Rainbow Dash had blown her to pieces with a grenade, causing her to snort. Pinkie jumped up and ran over to Rarity.

“I’ll take over!” She squeaked and scooped up the controller with her hooves and stuck it inside her mane.

I sat at my old desk and opened up my laptop, starting it up as Rarity stood beside me.

“If you like history, you’re about to fall in love with me.” I said to her as the laptop’s home screen loaded.

“Do tell?” Rarity said inquisitively.

“Well, Fluttershy was just wondering about how our worlds link, so I was going to show her something remarkable.” I told her.

My laptop was all loaded and good to go, and so I opened up Google Chrome.

“Give me a famous city, or a landmark in Equestria.” I requested.

“Las Pegasus?” Fluttershy suggested.

And so I searched for, ‘Las Vegas’, and went to Wikipedia. I turned around to see Fluttershy’s and Rarity’s eyes light up and stare at the screen in absolute amazement.

“They’re practically the same city; even the architectural designs are similar…” Rarity breathed.

“What about Canterlot?” Fluttershy asked.

I went back to Google and searched for Camelot, the great British castle known for housing the legendary King Arthur, the wielder of the Sword in the Stone…
After showing Rarity and Fluttershy a brief history of Camelot, I typed in 'Minas Tirith' from Lord of the Rings, as it was well known that Lauren Faust had based Canterlot on the design of the fictional city.

“Simply spectacular…” Rarity sighed in amazement.

“Our worlds really are linked…” Fluttershy muttered, absolutely star-struck.

I was going to show them more when Oliver called me over.

“Callum! Pinkie scares me!” He screamed.

I went over to see Pinkie was at the top of the leaderboard, and was one kill from a Tactical Nuke killstreak.

“How is she doing this? The controller is in her mane for god’s sake!” He wailed, almost crying.

Pinkie just giggled as she made her character bounce up and down, killing all the other players with nothing but semtex grenades and C-Four.

“Party cannon go!” She squeaked and detonated the C-Four, killing Rainbow Dash.

“No!” She growled.

The game then announced that Pinkie had earned the Tactical Nuke, and Pinkie’s face lit up with joy.

“Woo! Orbital Friendship Cannon is online!” She squealed and launched the nuke.

“Tactical Nuke inbound! It’s all over!” One of the game characters shouted.

Then there was the well-known beeping sound to signify the nuke’s timer; which as I had predicted, Pinkie joined in on.

“Boop Beep! Boop Beep! Boop Beep! Boop Beep!”

Game over.

“Dang it…” Rainbow Dash mumbled, pulling the battery out of her controller.

Pinkie pulled her controller out of her mane and looked at us all with a big smile.

“So, movie night?” She innocently asked.

Oliver looked at his watch and hummed.

“Well, it’s nearly six, I can put on some dinner and then we can put them on. Sound good?” He suggested.

We all agreed and went downstairs with Oliver to see what was for dinner, he opened the fridge and removed sour cream, some mushrooms, and the English Mustard, along with a large slab of beef.

“What’s cooking?” I asked curiously.

“For you and I, a nice beef Stroganoff. For the Faggot Horses, Mushroom Stroganoff.” He merrily replied.

He danced around the kitchen collecting herbs and spices and all the other ingredients, I took the rice from the cupboard and helped him out. It didn’t take long for the cooking to begin, as the ponies watched with fascination…

“My, my… This dish is simply divine!” Rarity exclaimed as she swallowed her first bite.

I mumbled in agreement as I munched on my third mouthful, we were all sitting in my room with plates on trays, watching the TV as we did so, by now it was half past six in the evening, and The Simpsons was on.
We ate our food as we enjoyed a good cartoon, and then I offered to clean up the dishes, which Rarity lovingly offered to help as well. After that, we picked out some films to watch and lay them out on my bed.
After a good ten minutes of voting on films, we decided to play Despicable Me in my room for Fluttershy and Pinkie. In Oliver’s room we put on Hot Fuzz for the others.

“If you need me, I’m just in the other room.” I told Fluttershy and Pinkie as I went into my brother’s room.

About halfway into the movie, Rainbow Dash poked my arm.

“Dude, I swear I’ve seen these guys before.” She told me, pointing at Nick Frost and Simon Pegg.

“What? Where?” I asked her.

“Before we went to Brazil, when Twilight used the spell to find the first shard and the police dudes showed up. They looked just like these two!” She said.

I looked at the screen and then tried to jog my memory back, I recalled one being tall and the other being stocky, but I assumed it was just a coincidence.

“Hm, possibly.” I hummed, and went back to watching the film.

When the film finished, we put on Snatch, and The Land Before Time on for the others, which I ended up having to watch, as Fluttershy had burst into tears when Littlefoot’s mother died, Rarity also joined us as Snatch was a bit too offensive for her liking.

“Hey, his name is Spike! Just like our Spike!” Pinkie squeaked.

I chuckled in response and started to properly enjoy the film, forgetting how entertaining kids films could be, especially the more ‘down to earth’ originals.

A few films later, it reached eleven at night and we all started to grow tired.

“Do you mind if we sleep here?” Fluttershy asked.

“By all means!” I smiled.

“I feel like another film to be honest.” Rarity hummed.

“How about you and I watch another film with the others, and then come in here to sleep?” I suggested.

Rarity nodded and we left Pinkie and Fluttershy to settle down.
We came back in to find the others roaring with laughter to Austin Powers, we joined them and had a laugh.
Afterwards we decided to honour the inspiration of Austin Powers and put on Skyfall, needless to say, the ponies were now completely immersed in human culture, as they couldn’t detach their eyes from the screen, completely absorbed in the action, violence, storyline, and emotion behind the characters.

“It’s so sad that M died at the end, I thought she’d survive…” Rainbow Dash sighed.

“I know, she reminded me of Rarity.” Applejack agreed.

“What! You think I’m old and whiny!?” She growled.

“Yes!” Oliver and Rainbow Dash answered together, before exchanging a bro-hoof.

I laughed and wrapped an arm around Rarity.

“They’re only teasing m’lady. Come on, let’s head to bed.” I chuckled.

Rarity snorted and got up with me and headed off to my room.

“We’re staying with Oliver, so we’ll see you tomorrow morning dude.” Dash told me before I left.

“Okie doke.” I replied and left my room.

I went into my room with Rarity to find Fluttershy was still awake, but Pinkie was out for the count and was curled up in a little ball on the blankets we had laid out, her tail tucked underneath her like a cushion.

“Good night Callum.” Rarity said fondly, giving me a small hug before curling up on a blanket.

I stripped down to my boxers and lay down on the blanket next to Fluttershy.

“Hey…” She whispered.

“Hey, you okay?” I quietly asked.

“Yeah, just a bit restless.” She replied.

“Why?”

“I just feel a bit low, I’ll be okay tomorrow.” She muttered, practically mouthing to words she was so quiet.

“Want a hug?” I suggested.

“Uhm… Yes please… If that’s okay with you…” She mumbled shyly.

I smiled before crawling over to her and putting my arms over her and giving her a little squeeze.

“Thanks.” She said kindly, nuzzling my chest and almost causing a heart attack.

“S’alright.” I replied happily before rolling over onto my side away from her.

I closed my eyes and was about to drift off when a hoof wrapped itself around me, followed by a wing, I was only just able to contain myself from clutching my chest and having a ‘hnng’ attack.

A good half hour later I still couldn’t sleep, and I was just about to drift off when Fluttershy started mumbling in her sleep.

“Hm… Middy…” She breathed.

That was when her hind leg wrapped itself over my waist, and she started dreamily kissing the back of my neck, occasionally mumbling Midnight’s name.

“Oh dear god no…” I whispered with a gulp, my eyes wide with sheer terror.

She was having a rather vivid dream, to say the least...

This was going to be a long night…

Chapter Twenty-Four: A Dash of Trauma

Chapter Twenty Four - That's Your Funeral

“Mornin’ sugarcube.” I heard Applejack say.

I stirred and opened my eyes to see the farm pony standing above me, smiling warmly.

“You’re just a big cuddle monster ain’t you?” She giggled.

I looked down to see Fluttershy was still attached to me, her chin resting on my chest, sleeping sweetly and silently, she then stirred and her head rolled off my torso.

“I like my cuddles.” I replied, sticking my tongue out to Applejack.

Fluttershy woke up and stretched; I reached over and gave her chin a little scratch, causing her to squeak in delight, which resulted in Applejack clutching her chest with a ‘hnng’.

“Hello sunshine.” I chuckled.

She giggled and gave me a small nuzzle, before getting up and heading off to the toilet.
The second she was gone, Rarity slid up next to me.

“So, what was last night all about Lover Boy?” She teased.

“What?” I blurted out in confusion.

“The serious spooning session with Fluttershy, you held her like a lover would.” She chuckled.

“I am a cuddly sleeper; I was comfy, simple as.” I replied indignantly.

“If you say so…” She hummed cheekily.

Thankfully, Oliver burst into the room and changed the subject.

“Tea! Would a faggot like a tea?” He sang merrily.

I signalled him with a hand to confirm that I’d like a cuppa, Rarity also requested one, and he scooted off.

“So, what now?” Applejack asked.

“Chill out until Twinkie Sparky comes back.” I replied.

We all chuckled at Twilight’s new nickname, and headed downstairs for breakfast.

The day was a repeat of yesterday really, we watched films, played video games, ate food, and did absolutely nothing productive.
We'd ploughed through all three Call of Duty: Modern Warfare campaigns, which resulted in Rarity and Applejack getting seriously emotional during a scene in the third game, where the character John MacTavish died in his best friend's arms. Even though it was just a game, they started to understand the real concept of war.

That was when I remembered…

“I’ve just realised, my funeral’s tomorrow.” I said to the group.

“Now that’s gonna be awkward…” Applejack chuckled.

“I’ve got a nice tuxedo if you need one.” Oliver offered.

“I don’t think it’d fit, my shoulders are a lot more broad.” I replied.

“Show-off…” He muttered.

“So, how are you going to get to the funeral without being noticed?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“I need a disguise.” I mumbled in deep thought.

“I could grow you a beard and dye your hair?” Rarity suggested.

“You could do that?” I asked, turning to face her.

“With ease.” She smiled.

I grinned and looked my brother in the eye, who looked back with the same smile, before we both quoted Hot Fuzz together in sync.

“A GREAT BIG BUSHY BEARD!”

Rainbow Dash and Applejack burst into laughter and Rarity’s horn lit up.

“If you say so, Sargent Nicholas Angle.” She teased.

“It’s Angel!” Oliver snorted.

Rarity giggled as she cast her spell onto me, and my entire chin started glowing white and began to tickle.

“By the power of Greyskull…” I mumbled.

I then pretended to have He-Man’s sword, and raised my fist into the air.

“I have the POWER!!!” I boomed as thick manly hair began to sprout from my face.

Oliver dropped to his knees in tears, howling with laughter.

“Now, hair colour?” Rarity asked when the magic wore off and Oliver calmed down.

“Jet black please.” I requested.

And with a swish and flick of her horn and a puff of blue-white sparkles, I looked like Daniel Radcliffe's lovechild with Santa Claus.

“Dude… That’s weird…” Dash mumbled.

“Trim?” Rarity asked.

“Yes please.”

Snip snip snip went most of the beard, resulting in a very nice goatee.

“Whoa, dude, you look kinda ho- uuhsome. You look awesome.” Dash blurted out.

I responded by biting my lip and giving her a teasing wink, leaving her bright red.

“Oh please, you big tart.” Rarity scoffed.

I grinned as she completed a few finishing touches to my beard.

“Stunning.” She smiled.

I looked in the mirror and beamed from ear to ear.

“I look like a sexy.” I said in a deep tone.

The ponies giggled and Oliver eventually laughed as well.

“So what now?” Applejack asked.

“Simple.” Oliver smiled.

Rarity gestured for him to continue.

“I take this motherfucker to his own funeral…”

The next day, I woke up early.
Fluttershy and I yet again cuddled throughout the night, and thankfully she didn’t try to mount me in her sleep.
I headed downstairs and made myself some cereal and a glass of milk; I loved milk, I’d been drinking it in bulk since my emergence from the womb; my bones were stronger than steel in my own opinion.

“Morning Daniel Fagcliffe.” Oliver muttered as he sleepily came into the kitchen.

“Morning twat-face.” I replied.

Oliver opened the fridge and took out some Cornish Pasties, and popped them into the new microwave next to the kettle, which he flicked on.

“How’s the new microwave?” I asked.

“Fuck you. I went three weeks without any pasties!” He snapped.

Now, common fact about my brother, is that he hates getting up early in the day. Once upon a time, he once threatened me with the large hunting knife he sleeps with, because I woke him up.

“Blame AJ, not me.” I chuckled.

“Fucking inbred Texan redneck…” He grumbled.

I almost burst into tears of laughter, and was only just able to contain myself.

“Tea?” Oliver asked as the kettle boiled.

“Yes please.”

“Sugar?”

“No thank you Turkish, I’m sweet enough.”

“Stop quoting films and have some sugar you fucking twat-monkey.”

I zipped my lips as he gave me two teaspoons of sugar.

A cuppa tea later, I went upstairs and entered my room.

“Good morning.” Rarity smiled, stretching.

“Hello lovely.” I happily smiled back.

The others were still asleep, including Fluttershy, who was on her back, her tongue lolling out the side of her saliva coated muzzle; I couldn’t help but lightly chuckle to myself at how she slept, it was weirdly beautiful in the most unattractive way.
I opened my wardrobe and searched for an outfit; I settled on some black suit trousers, a dark purple shirt, and a smart black jacket, along with some leather smart shoes.
I stripped to my boxers and was about to put on my trousers when I heard my door open.

“Hey guys, are you awake yet, Oliver’s making… Uh… I…”

I turned around to see Rainbow Dash staring at me, her mouth agape.

“Morning.” I smiled.

“M-m-morning Callum.” She stuttered.

“Is there something wrong?” I asked, subtly flexing my torso muscles and biceps.

She instantly noticed my biceps expand and my pecs double in size.

“N-no. Not at all. I’ll, I’ll come back later.” She muttered and left the room, not taking her eyes off me.

She closed the door and I heard a snort from behind me; I turned to see Rarity, her cheeks bright red as she tried her best not to burst into uncontrollable laughter.

“What?” I asked innocently.

“Call it a hunch if you may… But I think someone likes you…” She said as calmly as she could.

“Dashie, really? It was only playful flirting.” I replied.

“Really Callum? Did you not notice her blushing like a cherry?” She pointed out.

“Yeah, so? She blushes really easily, she has been for weeks.” I replied.

“Oh for goodness sake, she’s never blushed like that. She really likes you. She’s always been curious about relationships with other species, and you’re ticking all her boxes so far.” She explained.

“I, see…” I hummed.

I was rather unsure as of what to think, I hadn’t really expected any of the ponies to get a crush on me. Really, in all honesty, I didn’t see myself as that desirable; but that being said, my time in Brazil had made my muscles very defined…
Either way, I wasn’t interested; ponies weren’t exactly my relationship interests, but I didn’t see any harm in continuing to flirt with her and to be a tease.
I shrugged and got dressed, I then looked in the mirror and had second thoughts on being desirable; I looked HOT.

“Looking very dapper.” Rarity commented.

“Why thank you.” I replied with a bow.

“You may look sexy, but you’re still a twat.” Oliver said, walking in.

I chuckled and applied some Lacoste aftershave so I smelt like something along the lines of om’nom’nom’nom…

“WAKE UP! BREAKFAST IS READY!” Oliver yelled.

Fluttershy screamed in shock and shot upwards and hit the ceiling; Pinkie on the other hand, opened one eye, and started to grin as she opened up the other.

“Ooooohhh… How exciting…” She hissed deviously.

I raised an eyebrow before going over to hug Fluttershy, who was crying.

“Sorry Butterscotch.” Oliver said sympathetically.

“It’s… F-Fluttersh-shy… And it’s, it’s, ok-kay…” She cried.

My brother slowly back away and slithered out of my room to prepare the breakfast, not wanting to deal with an upset Fluttershy.

“Are you alright?” I asked Fluttershy.

“Yeah, it j-just scared me and I hit my h-head…” She sniffed.

I hugged her tighter and stroked the back of her neck.
In seconds she was alright, my stroking seemed to calm her greatly.

“Quark! Morning faggots! Morning faggots!” Blu squawked as he flew into the room.

“OLIVER I SWEAR TO GOD! HAVE YOU TAUGHT THE PARROT TO SWEAR!?!?!” I boomed.

From downstairs was a roar of belly laughter.

“For goodness sake…” Rarity sighed, shaking her head in disapproval.

Later that morning, after we’d all woken up and eaten breakfast, I went upstairs to brush my teeth. Suddenly I heard shouting from downstairs, I rushed down to see Oliver holding Wrinkleboom, raising the weapon up like a sacred trophy.

“YOU HAVE A SHOTGUN! WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME YOU HAD A SHOTGUN!?” He demanded to know.

“Because you’re a dangerous sociopath with a long-term history of violence.” I replied calmly.

“Oh yeah…” He hummed, putting down the gun.

I opened the side-compartment of Oliver’s rucksack and pulled out Ingeo’s pistol.

“Sweet… An M-Nineteen-Eleven…”

“This belonged to Ingeo Montenegro himself.” I told him.

“Seriously!?” He exclaimed.

“Eeyup.” I grinned.

“Dang…”

I put the pistol back, and then put Wrinkleboom in the top of the bag again.

“You know, I’ve got a gun-belt for the pistol, and it holds shotgun cartridges.” Oliver told me.

“Sweet, that’d be really helpful.” I replied merrily.

“I’ll look for it when we get back from your funeral.” He said.

Oliver was also dressed for the funeral, in some black jeans, a black shirt, and a black jacket.

“Weird to think everyone there thinks I’m dead.” I mumbled.

He hummed, before we both sat on the sofa and relaxed.

“Say, what ever happened to the dogs?” Oliver asked.

“Oh, I killed them and ate them.” I replied casually.

“Ah, fair enough.”

I chuckled at his casual reaction, and went on to explain how I'd taken them to my friend Bruce, as I feared they'd run away after I faked my death, I wanted to know they were in safe hands before I departed for my journey.

“I’d very much like them back though; I kinda liked them, you know?” He said dully.

“Sure thing. If he’s not at the funeral today, I’ll get them later today with Rarity.”

“Coolio.”

I smiled at the thought of seeing my little Chilli again, and Archer; I missed my pups…

“Right, funeral’s quite a way off, over in Royal Tunbridge Wells, so we better get going.” Oliver told me.

“Why there?” I asked.

“Apparently it was the cheapest place to have a funeral, which is understandable as she’s not even going.” He answered.

"Mum's not coming?"

"Nope, she's going to be on holiday for at least another week."

Even for her, that was pretty low. Not bothering to come to her own son's funeral, she must have genuinely never loved me...

“Standard.” I mumbled, slightly disheartened.

“Well, let’s go.”

I followed my big brother out of the house, looking fine and dandy, and that’s when I saw Oliver’s car.

“Oh… My… God…” I muttered.

My brother chuckled.

“Yeah, sexy isn’t she? I won her in a military tour raffle.” He explained.

Oliver’s ‘car’ (if it could be called that), was a military green Land Rover Defender, with massive truck tires, a snorkel on the side, a deer skull on the bonnet, and was decorated with military call-signs and emblems.

“She’s beautiful…” I breathed.

“Wanna know the best bit?” He asked.

I merely nodded. Oliver then picked up a large stone and threw it as hard as he could at the vehicle.
The stone collided with an ear-splitting ‘CLANG!’ as it shattered into pieces.
The Land Rover, however, didn’t even have a scratch.

“Bullet-proof mother fucker! She’s proper military grade!” My brother squealed in delight.

I raised my eyebrows, impressed.

“Well, hop in!” He commanded.

“Sir, yes sir!”

“Do you think the ponies will be safe home alone?” I asked him as we roared down the motorway.

“They should be! I left some food out for them and left the Xbox on!” He answered.

“Okie dokes!”

We’d been in the car for an hour, when Oliver decided to have a bit of fun.

“I spy, with my little eye, something fucking terrified!” He roared as he pulled on the steering wheel.

The jeep swerved to the right and almost collided with the car beside us, causing the driver to nearly crash and beep the horn savagely before slowing down to let us overtake them; Oliver laughed hysterically all the while.

“Oliver, you’re a reckless prick! I fucking LOVE IT!” I roared.

“That’s my bro! Get into the spirit!” He chuckled.

The laughter died down, and we zoomed off down the motorway to Royal Tunbridge Wells…

“Well, we’re here.” Oliver said.

“Looks like we’re here early.” I mumbled, noticing the lack of cars in the car park.

“Or late.” My brother suggested.

“If we were late, there would be other cars, dumbass.” I pointed out.

“Hey, watch your language and be respectful to my poor belated dead brother.” He growled.

“I’m still alive you dick!” I spat, punching him in the arm playfully.

“Yeah… Shame…” He sighed, shaking his head.

I rolled my eyes.

“Right, let’s just wait until someone else turns up.” I said.

About twenty minutes later, a car turned up.

“Wow, someone does care about you!” Oliver said with surprise.

That was when the Co-Op Funeralcare host got out the car, and Oliver burst into laughter.

“Guess I was wrong!” He bellowed.

I rolled my eyes again…

Another ten minutes later, other cars finally started arriving, I recognised the yellow Porsche that belonged to the father of my friend Harry; his dad was loaded with money, and had all sorts of expensive cars and gizmos at his home.

“Rich twat.” Oliver muttered.

I then noticed the small red car that belonged to my dearest friend, Annabel Knight.
The car was followed by numerous other vehicles that consisted of friends and family…
My family that decided to show up was my Auntie Becca and her husband Garth, along with their son Camille. My Uncle Simon, and my godfather, Mark Christmas.

“Hey, Marky Mark turned up!” Oliver smiled as he recognised my godfather.

As my dad was always working during my childhood, Mark used to look after me very often, and would take me out every weekend, he was practically my second father…

“Right, shall we get this started?” Oliver asked.

“Go for.” I agreed.

The both of us hopped out the Land Rover, which the others all noticed and got out of their cars as well. Being in disguise, I had to pretend I didn’t know any of these people, and so I just went with Oliver to greet these ‘strangers’…

“Hey Becks.” Oliver said to our Auntie.

“Hey Oliver…” She sighed as she came to give my brother a hug.

“Alright Garth.”

“Alright Oli.” Garth replied as the two shook hands.

“And who’s this?” Rebecca asked kindly in direction to me.

“This is…” Oliver said slowly.

“Bruce. Bruce Harding.” I answered, shaking my aunt’s hand politely, and then Garth’s.

“Family?”

“Close friend.” I replied, tightening my lips and looking at the ground.

After a brief chat, Oliver went to talk with Mark, and I went to talk to Harry.

“Hey, uhm, Harry? Harry Courtney?” I asked as he got out of the car.

“Yeah?” He asked hoarsely.

“I’m Bruce, one of Callum’s mates… I saw some of your YouTube videos together, you guys seemed close.” I said with a weak smile.

“Yeah, we were…” He sighed.

He looked at the ground for a bit, before looking back at me.

“How’d you know him?”

“We were childhood friends; I’ve known him since I can remember.” I told him.

“Ah…” He hummed, looking down again.

Harry was the most optimistic person I knew, he was always happy and never looked on the down-side.
Seeing him like this was absolutely heart-breaking.

“Do you know when we’re supposed head in?” I asked him.

“In a bit, when the coffin arrives.” He muttered.

“Alright.” I sighed and walked away from him.

I went to speak with my closest friend, Annabel; to find that my other best friends Connor and Aarin were there as well, which caused a smile to briefly light up my face, before I noticed how upset they all looked.
Annabel was basically the closest thing I had to a sister, regardless of the fact I once had a massive crush on her when we first met.

“Excuse me… Are you three Annabel, Connor and Aarin?” I asked nervously.

They both turned to face me at the same time, Annabel went to speak but simply choked up and looked away.

“Yes, we are… Who are you?” Aarin asked.

Aarin was kind and gentle, like a really friendly bear. He was the master of hugs, and was always awake late at night if I ever needed a chat about my own problems. Connor was quite possibly the most handsome guy alive, he was slim and funky, not a month went by when he didn't have a different hairstyle. He was the king of cosplay, and probably knew more about fashion than Rarity.
Annabel was the one who nearly caused multiple heart attacks from cuteness over the time I’ve known her, she had puppy eyes strong enough to make a grown man collapse.

“I’m Bruce Harding… I was his mate, a long time ago. I’ve just come to pay my respects…” I mumbled.

I hadn’t even said my real name, and Annabel's eyes began to water up, I could see the pain in her glassy eyes. My death had absolutely destroyed her, I hadn’t realised I meant this much to her…

“I’m s-sorry…” She choked as tears began to roll down her cheeks.

“It’s okay, this is a difficult day.” I sighed.

Aarin went over to comfort Annabel, and gave her one of his famed bear hugs. Connor looked at me and we made eye contact for about five seconds, before he rushed towards me and held me by my shoulders, staring into my eyes.

“I know those eyes anywhere…” He whispered.

{He saw right through the disguise!} I thought to myself in fear.

“You’ve always had a good eye.” I exhaled.

“How? Why?”

“I’ll explain when the funeral’s over.” I told her.

Annabel and Aarin looked at me as I gave Connor a hug, both of them confused.

“Don't tell anyone for now, I need a low profile.” I hissed.

He nodded as he let go of me, and took one last look into my eyes.

“It really is you…” She breathed in shock.

He almost fainted as he leaned forward and hugged me tightly for a second time.

“I will explain everything after the funeral, I promise.” I told him, letting him go.

“Do you know him?” Aarin asked.

“Yeah, he's an old friend from school, I didn’t recognise him at first.” Connor lied.

“Anyway, I best see if Callum’s brother is alright.” I told them both, and headed back over to Oliver.

Just as I was about to reach him, a fluffy cannon ball shot into my leg and almost knocked me over, I looked down to see a very dazed chocolate coloured cocker spaniel sitting at my foot, looking up at me with large sparkling eyes.

“Hello Little Bear…” I whispered.

Chilli stood on her hind legs and pawed at my thigh, and I picked her up and nuzzled her chest as she began to lick my face furiously, my eyes watered up as I was finally reunited with my dog.

“Well, there she is.” Oliver hummed.

I gave Chilli one last kiss on the forehead before giving her to my brother to hold, and just in time; I turned around to find a gigantic black blur fly into me and head-butt my chest, almost knocking me over for a second time.

“And the big boy too.” I groaned as I tried to balance myself.

I gave Archer a massive hug and let him engulf my face with his tongue as he joyfully licked me.

“Alright, calm down.” I hushed as I patted his large neck.

I left Archer to see Oliver while I saw Bruce come from behind Oliver’s Land Rover.

“Glad you could make it.” I smiled.

“Who are you? Wait, Cal-”

“Sshh.” I hissed.

“Ah.” He said in understanding, realising I was in a disguise.

I put my hand on his shoulder and gave him a friendly smile.

“I really appreciate you looking after the dogs.”

“It wasn’t a problem.” He smiled.

“Boy do I have some stories to tell you about my adventure.” I sighed.

“I think they can wait.” Bruce replied softly, looking behind me.

I turned to see a black car, containing a coffin had arrived; I nodded at Bruce with a smile, before walking back over to my brother, who had put the dogs in the back of the car.

“Hey look, there’s Faggot Number Two.” Oliver scoffed to me, nodding towards the black car with the coffin inside.

“Oh ha, ha." I replied dully.

Oliver chuckled quietly, and then went over with Garth, Mark, and Simon to carry to coffin indoors, it was weird to think the coffin contained my dead body. I followed everyone else as they went indoors to take their seats.

The room was just big enough to fit everyone in, and they took up all but one seat, the funeral service was run by the Co-Operative, rather than a religious group, so thankfully we could skip all the Jesus and God malarkey.
The funeral host stood before my coffin, which was sat next to a large photograph of myself on a big stand; (a rather good-looking photograph of myself, might I add...)
After the entry music (Beethoven's first movement of Moonlight Sonata), had stopped, the funeral host began his speech.

“Please be seated…
We are gathered here this morning in the loving memory of Callum Horncastle.
He died on Sunday, July the Thirteenth, Two-Thousand and Fourteen.
As we remember him, our sympathy and condolences go out to the all family and friends that he left behind.
They, along with their loved ones, grieve in a special way today before each other.”

By now, many people in the room were sniffing and wiping their eyes.
The host continued.

“Callum was well-known for looking on the bright side of life, and always had something good to say.
He was a natural performer, acting was his passion, he lived to entertain, and to make the world a more enjoyable place.
Regardless of his eccentric, enthusiastic way of living, he was modest and respectful.
While I did not know Callum personally, I can say that he was evidently, a gentleman.
His passing is a great loss to all of us, and it is a tragedy to lose him so young...”

Everyone in the room was now crying, the host put down his papers and walked over to a small podium.

“A few people present would like to say some things about Callum, before a poem written by Annabel Knight.”

My heart stopped for a second as my emotions built up inside.

{Annabel had written me a poem!?}

The first to stand at the podium was my Godfather Mark, he was a fireman with a large broad body. Besides working for the fire department, he was also a boxer and had gotten me into the sport, I owe him for my hand-to-hand combat experience. If it weren’t for him, I’d never have become such a good boxer, his training had certainly ensured my survival in Brazil.

“Callum, the day I met you, I knew you would grow up to be the good man you are today. You had this look in your eye that shone like the North Star, and your eyes have never lost that shine.
As a boy, you were a well behaved young man, with a big appetite and the happiest grin on your face. Whenever I looked at you, you had the same devious look, as though you’d planned to take over the world. Which I caught you attempting at least four times…”

The audience laughed for a moment.

“You were a good boy, and I am beyond proud to have been called your Godfather.
I wish I could have called you my own son… I love you little man… I’m going to miss you…”

That’s when the big, broad, boxing fireman began to cry, and he returned to his seat…

The next to stand, was my Uncle Simon, who was already tearful before he’d even spoken.
My uncle was a computer expert, and had taught me how to take computers apart and put them back together with ease. He'd shown me how to hack online systems, and how to hot-wire cars and motorbikes. As I grew older and became a gamer, he taught me how to pirate games so I could play the latest games without paying a penny.
Without my uncle Simon, I wouldn’t have such a deep understanding of technology and how to use it…

“I don’t have much to say. I guess; I’m sorry… I’m sorry that I didn’t see you more…
I saw you as a kid, and I showed you how to work gadgets and stuff, but I never really spent much quality time with you, and I regret it.
If I knew this was going to happen… I’d have come to see you more, I swear…
You were the kindest little guy I knew… And little Amber loves you to pieces…
I couldn’t have asked for a better nephew… I’m sorry Cal…”

He, too, quietly cried to himself as he walked away to his seat.

By now, my eyes were watered up and ready to leak. I honestly hadn’t realised how much I meant to all my family, and it was killing me to see them all so upset… Next up was my aunt, who had a very similar speech to Simon’s, about not being able to see me as much.
I didn’t blame either of them for not seeing me though. Rebecca had her little Camille to look after, and a husband to love. Much like Simon had his daughter Amber, who was too emotional to come to the funeral.

A few more words were said by various people, before the main event began.

“And lastly, a poem for Callum from Annabel Knight.” The host announced.

I gulped, this was going to be emotional, I just knew it…

“What keeps me sane are the memories of us, the pictures freeze in time.
My heart captured everything on record, and stored it in my mind.
I think of you, I sit and ask myself, why?
Why couldn't I have been there?
Why wasn't I there to help?
If I were there I could have saved you, just called for help on my phone.
It kills me inside to know you had to die there, all alone…
You are loved, with all our hearts, and you are sorely missed.
I wish I could see you one last time, your forehead I’d have kissed.
Just to say goodbye, before you ascend into your heavenly tomb…
Reach down and take my hand, take me away with you…
When I think of you it hurts, and soon my eyes shed rain
It makes me sob inside to know, it ended with such pain…
You gave me love, and touched my life, you were the best friend I ever had.
We play like brother and sister, yet you protected me like a dad…
When I see those happy pictures of you, I smile before I cry.
Thinking how much you meant to me, as I look to the night sky…
I look up the stars at night.
To see which one is shining bright
I wish I could see one more of your smiles.
I would travel over a million miles…
I need you, and I miss you… I’m wishing you were here…
For losing you, my friend… That… That was my g-greatest fear…
I love you C-Callum… Good… Goodbye…”

That was when she fell down to her knees, and began to sob.
My vision went blurry as my own tears began to stream down my face; I was absolutely speechless as I wept to myself.
The poem had completely taken me off-guard, I assumed it would be meaningful, but nothing like that…

“That was beautiful, thank you Annabel.” The host said, helping Annabel to her feet.

She shakily stood up and shuffled over to her seat, where Aarin and Connor both gave her an enormous hug.

“Hadn’t realised females actually liked you…” Oliver whispered into my ear.

“Ruin the moment, why not?” I spluttered back.

After a few more last words, everyone stood up as a transparent curtain came between us and the coffin; followed by some music, which happened to be one of my favourite songs; The Scientist by Coldplay.
After the second curtain came down and blocked the coffin from side, a door to the side of the room opened and we all walked through into a memorial garden, where people exchanged tender hugs and deep conversation; that was when Connor approached me.

“Can we talk now?” He asked.

I nodded.

“Get Annabel and Aarin for me, I’ll meet you outside.” I told her.

While she went to grab Annabel, I went to Harry and put my hand on his shoulder.

“You alright?” I asked.

“Yeah… I’m fine.” He mumbled.

“Good, then get your arse outside, we have to talk.” I ordered with a smile.

“What?”

“It’s me you twat.”

He looked at me intensely, and then started to recognise me through my disguise.

“C… Callum…?”

“Hello sunshine.”

“But, you… I don’t-”

“Come outside, I’ll explain everything.” I told him.

He looked at me in shock, he was completely stunned.

“Now boy.” I commanded, playfully poking his chest.

He shook his head and followed me as I headed outside with Connor, Aarin and Annabel.

We walked some distance away from the building, we stopped at a small pond with a bench next to it, where Harry and Annabel sat down together, Connor and Aarin remained standing.

“Right, guys, before I explain, there’s one thing you all need to get a grip on.” I told them.

They looked at me curiously.

“The reason I’m still alive, is down to magic. Supernatural forces, hocus pocus.” I said.

"What?" Harry asked quietly.

"It's Mickey Mouse mate, my death wasn't real, I faked the whole thing."

They looked at me blankly.

“And now, to prove that.” I grinned as I removed a pill.

The pill, was given to me by Rarity before I left this morning, it dispels the magic she’d cast on me.
I swallowed the pill, and my beard began to evaporate, as my black hair returned to its normal length and colour.

“By the power of Greyskull…” Harry breathed.

Without any warning, Annabel jumped off the bench, sprinted forward and dived at me, wrapping both her arms and legs around me and almost knocking me over, she didn’t speak, she just buried her face into my neck and wouldn’t let go of me.

“Miss me?” I asked with a grin.

I hugged her back tightly, before she finally detached from me.
Which was when she unexpectedly smacked me across the face, causing me to whip around to face Harry.

“Not sure I deserved that.” I spoke, rather shocked.

As I turned around, I was met by Connor, who backhand slapped me in the face, again causing me to turn to Harry.

“I may have deserved that.” I said after a small pause.

Harry chuckled, while I looked back to find Aarin about to punch me in the crotch.

"No, no, no, no, no, no... Maybe, maybe not the nethers?"

He stood back amongst Annabel and Connor, who were both frowning at me.

“I guess, I have some explaining to do…” I mumbled.

“Start talking!.” Annabel spat choking up.

“Do you have any idea what we’ve been through, thinking you were dead!?” Connor growled, his eyes watering up.

“I understand it must have been very painful, but I can explain...” I said defensively, trying to calm her down.

“Then explain.” He demanded coldly, full of suppressed emotion.

“Guys, are you forgetting he had a magic beard?" Harry pointed out.

I took a breath of relief as Harry jumped up from the bench and defended me.

"Let me just repeat that guy… Magic. Beard. I think he’s got a reasonable explanation.” Harry pointed out.

I sighed with relief as they all calmed down as Harry’s point was very valid.

“Trust me, I’ve been through some shit as well.” I said, hoping for at least some sympathy.

“Like?” Connor spoke, showing none of the sympathy I was hoping for.

“Well, I was shot a few times, beaten to a pulp, electrocuted, cut open with a knife, and had my hand penetrated by a cordless drill. Tot to mention almost being starved to death, and crawling through raw sewage in the pipelines of Brazil.” I smiled.

“Right…” Aarin replied, not believing a word of it.

To prove I was telling the truth, I unbuttoned my shirt and showed them the deep scar Ingeo had left on my chest.

“Damn son…” Harry breathed.

“What the fuck happened…?” Annabel asked, now full of worry.

“You’re going to have to keep an open mind to this, as my story is very… Out there…” I warned them.

The group all moved closer, ready to listen. That was when Oliver came along.

“Oh, is this a bad time?” He asked.

“No, it’s fine, I was just telling them how I’m still alive.” I replied.

“Ah, the legend of the faggot and his talking horses. I love this story!” He chuckled as he sat on the bench.

“Talking… Horses?” Annabel quizzed.

“As I was saying, this story is rather, supernatural…” I said.

“Hurry up boy! I wanna know!” Harry playfully growled, punching my arm.

I took a deep breath, before smiling and beginning my tale.

“Well, you see, I was putting my chickens to bed one night…”

Chapter Twenty-Five: Science and Progress

Chapter Twenty Five - Friendship is Emotional

“So, that’s about it…” I told the group, concluding my story.

By now, everyone’s eyes were wide and fixed upon me as I explained my journey so far; and now, everyone was speechless.
Besides Oliver of course…

“Theeee… End… Best story ever, I’m telling my grandchildren that story over a log fire one day...” He grinned.

I chuckled, while Annabel, Connor and Aarin remained bedazzled by my tale.

“So, yeah… That’s my story.” I said, trying to snap them out of their current state.

Eventually, after a good thirty second silence, Harry spoke.

“So, you really took out Ingeo, even after getting shot and tortured and stuff?” He asked.

“Eeyup.” I answered, nodding.

“You may be white… But you are the true G Nigga…” He said in a US Ghetto accent.

Oliver and I laughed, while Annabel and Aarin eventually came to terms with my story, Connor remained in shock.

“So you’re telling me, the ponies from My Little Pony are real, and in your house right now?” He asked.

“Yup.” I grinned.

“I need to start watching that show…” Annabel giggled.

“I don’t believe you.” Connor huffed, folding his arms.

“He’s telling the truth bro, I’ve spent the past two days playing Xbox with them!” Oliver said, backing me up.

“And all this time I thought you were a huge faggot for being a Brony.” Harry teased.

“Oh make no mistake, he’s still a faggot.” Oliver chuckled.

Oliver and Harry laughed together as I frowned, not amused by term that had relentlessly followed me since I joined the herd.

“I need to see them; I’m not going to believe all of this just via word of mouth.” Connor said with a frown.

That was when an interesting idea popped into my head, I removed my mobile phone and dialled my home number, and then put it onto loud-speaker so everybody could hear. A few seconds later, the phone was answered.

“Good afternoon, this is Mrs Horncastle speaking.” A voice spoke.

This voice was mellow, and too posh for my mother’s standards by a long-shot.

“Cut the disguise Rare, it’s just me.” I said.

“I don’t understand what you’re talking about.” Rarity said innocently.

“You’re really sticking with the password?”

“Yes… I mean, uhm, I don’t follow…”

I rolled my eyes so hard that my retinas almost detached.

“Charlie and Oscar Hotel, Foxtrot to Tango without Delta.” I groaned.

“Alright Callum, all clear, how can I help?” She asked.

I could tell she was smiling to herself, just by the sound of her voice down the phone.

“Would you be a lamb and switch on my laptop and go on Skype please?” I requested.

“Sure thing, is it safe to call?”

“Yeah, there’s just a close friend of mine who isn’t quite convinced I’m alive, you see.” I explained.

“I understand, hold on a moment.” She said, and then hung up the phone.

I rubbed my forehead. I couldn’t believe Rarity had made a secret safe-word using military talk…
Charlie Hotel, Oscar Hotel, Foxtrot to Tango without Delta.
It stood for 'Callum and Oliver Horncastle, Free to Talk without Disguise.'
Rarity had enjoyed the Call of Duty games so much that she was desperate to use military code, so the password wasn't negotiable.

I switched on my phone’s Three G and loaded up Oliver’s Skype account. Moments later my own account popped up as online, and so I hit the call button and it started ringing, Rarity swiftly answered from my laptop.

“Hello? Callum?” Rarity asked.

“G’day g’day.” I replied in an Australian accent.

Rarity then switched on the Skype camera, and my bedroom came into sight, along with Rarity herself. That was when the group crowded around me in awe and amazement.

“Uhm, hello there.” Rarity said shyly.

“Yo… It's a unicorn.” Harry mumbled.

Without warning, Pinkie Pie burst into the room and pushed Rarity aside and pushed her face up against the screen.

“HI!” She squeaked.

And with that, Connor fainted and flopped to the ground, thankfully onto the soft grass.

“Well, I think it’s safe to say he believes us now.” Oliver chuckled…

After a brief chat about the funeral, and how Pinkie had somehow been able to get to tenth prestige on CoD's multiplayer mode, I ended the call with Rarity and waited for Connor to wake up, which he did eventually.

“You okay sunshine?” I asked, helping her up.

“You… You weren’t lying…” He muttered.

“Well, lying isn’t exactly my strongpoint.” I replied with a grin.

“That means all your torture; and being shot… That was all real?”

“I’m afraid so.” I answered with a troubled look.

Without warning, he latched onto me like a koala bear and hugged me tightly.

"I'm alright, I promise." I said.

He let go and stood back, before giving me a nervous look.

“So, you… You’ve killed a man?”

I paused, and took in a deep breath, before answering.

“I have…” I muttered.

“He gets it from me.” Oliver said with a proud grin.

“That’s insane… The Horn is truly unstoppable…” Harry breathed with a grin on his face.

“The Horn?” Annabel asked in sync with Connor and Aarin.

And thus, I had to explain my nickname.
Back when I first started boxing, I was an utter natural, and won almost all of my fights, I was soon quite recognised among the boxing community for my broad shoulders and my very risky superman punch, which was barely used in boxing as it left you off guard and open to attack. As my surname was Horncastle, I was titled The Horn.
Additionally, I had a playful spar with a classmate one time at school, and I charged into him, the poor boy wasn't ready and flew quite a few metres across the playground, people talked about it so much that I ended up inventing a wrestling move; simply called The Charge of The Horn. Soon enough, everybody knew me as The Horn.

“Oh, I get it.” Annabel said with a smile, amused by the name.

“You’re going back out there, to find the rest of these shards?” Aarin changed the subject, although he already knew the answer.

I nodded.

“You know you could die, right? You understand that any day could be your last?”

“I am aware of this.” I replied bluntly.

“Why are you risking your life for them?” He asked.

“Equestria is real, there's a whole entire planet out there, Aarin. There are families, husbands, wives, brothers and sisters; there are children out there with their lives depending on this very mission! I’m not going to stand back and know millions of children will die. I have to help, no matter the cost; the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few…”

“Or the one…” Harry finished for me.

“Nice Star Wars quote.” Oliver grinned.

Harry and I both stared at Oliver, giving him a dead look.

“I can no longer call you my brother…” I spat.

“I was joking, ya twats. I know it's from Star Trek.”

“What happens now?” Annabel butted in, again changing the subject.

“Well, once Twilight gets back from Chernobyl, she’ll come home and teleport us all over there.” I answered.

“Wait, as in THE, Chernobyl!?” Harry exclaimed.

“Yeah, weren’t you listening to my story?”

“Yeah, but I didn’t hear Chernobyl.”

“Harry, I said Chernobyl like six times!”

That’s when Harry shuffled away from me.

“I wasn’t listening, I was thinking about something else…” He muttered.

I rolled my eyes and chuckled.

Some five, ten minutes later of talking about my adventure so far, Oliver cleared his throat and got up to leave.

“Right, we’ve overstayed our welcome, we need to get the dogs home, and the ponies kept in check.”

“What? No!” Annabel squeaked.

I looked at her, I knew this wasn't going to be easy. Saying goodbye was the hardest part, always.
Oliver knew everybody was going to get emotional so he went over to start up his car.

“You can’t just leave, not now. Not after finding out you’re alive, only to possibly die for real…” Annabel said, her eyes tearing up.

“I’m sorry Annabel, but I have to…”

“No you don’t!” She shouted.

We were all taken aback, she then came up to me and prodded my chest, hard.

“You don’t have to! This is your choice! You’re running off to save everyone like a hero!
I don’t want you to be a hero! I just want you to be alive! I just want you to be safe…” She yelled, beginning to cry.

Aarin came up behind her and gave her a big hug, and looked at me.

“I know you’re doing the right thing…” He breathed, trying not to cry as well.

I sighed, and looked down. I understood what I was doing, and it made this adventure more difficult than expected.
I was abandoning my closest friends…

“Annabel, Connor, Aarin, Harry…” I breathed quietly.

They all faced me, including Annabel, who looked up from Aarin's chest with tearful eyes, sniffing loudly.

“I’m not making this choice to leave you behind, but to help others. People are going to die if this mission fails, and the ponies can't do it without me. I’m doing this for the greater good, to stop evil from bringing death and destruction to a whole world.
I love you guys… You’re my best friends… Honestly, I love all of you, so damn much…
But I’ve got to do this. Without sounding cheesy as fuck, this is my destiny.
I was chosen for this, by Equestria's ruler, a demi-god! I can’t turn down a god.”

“Demi-god.” Harry interrupted.

I playfully punched Harry's arm and gave an amused huff.

“Look, guys, my point is, this is my chance to do something meaningful in my life; I can finally do something truly good.
And if... IF I die, I’ll die happy; knowing that I spent my last days doing something good.
Now that you know the truth, I can keep in touch, I’ll find ways of contacting you, I promise...”

Connor began to break down and rushed towards me, giving me a tight hug.

“But I don’t want you to go!” He sobbed.

I held him tight and gave him a long, long hug, before looking him in the eye and wiping a tear away.

“Hey…” I cooed.

He looked up at me, trying to keep himself together.

“I am always going to be here… Always…” I smiled, gently poking his chest, pointing to his heart.

“Okay…” He choked.

Oliver then beeped the horn of his Land Rover, he was clearly impatient.

“I gotta go…” I sighed, breaking off the hug.

“Wait!” Annabel cried with desperation.

I tilted my head on one side.

“I want you to have this…” She said, pulling off her ring and giving it to me.

The ring was simple, yet beautiful, it was a twist ring, and appeared to be made of sterling silver. I tried to put the ring on, to find my ring finger was too big; however, my pinkie finger was perfect.

“Annabel, this is beautiful. Thank you…” I thanked her, beaming.

“Love you Cal…” She said, with happy tears streaming down her cheeks.

“I love you Annaboo…” I replied, giving her one last hug.

“Now bugger off before I get emotional.” She teased, playfully hitting my arm.

I gave Annabel a hug, and she kissed my cheek. I then gave Connor and Aarin their last hugs.

“Stay safe.” Connor pleaded.

“I will.” I promised.

Harry approached me, and put out his fist, his was too manly for hugs, and so he received a fist bump.

“Don’t die again, yeah?”

“I’ll do my best.” I grinned.

I was about to walk away, when I put a hand on his shoulder and whispered into his ear.

“Remember this little bro, as my last piece of wisdom…
When you take a woman to bed, however long you think the foreplay should be… Triple it...”

“Thank you, oh wise Horn…”

And with that, I hopped into the Land Rover with Oliver, blew kisses to my dearest friends, and drove off. Back to home…

A few days later, I was awoken by a loud scream of excitement; I rolled over to find I’d overslept and the others were already up and about. I got dressed and left my bedroom when suddenly Pinkie Pie shot out of Oliver’s room and disappeared out of sight around the corner; I took a step forward only to have Fluttershy whizz past me at an equal speed.

“EXCUSE ME!” She screamed.

I stood there in shock, which was when Applejack came out of my brother’s room, chuckling to herself.

“What… The hell… Has gotten into them?” I asked.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen Flutters so lively before.” AJ giggled.

Pinkie flew up the stairs and came back around the corner and pounced on me, pinning me to the ground.

“HIYA!” She squeaked.

“Heya!” I coughed as she got off me.

Just before I could stand, Fluttershy hurtled into me and hugged me.

“HELLO!!!” She sang.

“Heeyy…” I wheezed.

I didn’t bother getting up after that, and just looked up at the two ponies, both of them shaking with excitement.

“What’s got you two so worked up?” I quizzed.

“It’s our shared birthday tomorrow!” Pinkie squealed.

“What?” I said blankly.

“It’s our shared birthday tomorrow!” Fluttershy yelled and bounced around.

“Sh-shared birthday?” I asked in disbelief.

“We were both born on the same day of the year! August the Seventeenth!” She told me.

“But, wait, I… I…” I stuttered.

I was completely taken aback; Pinkie and Fluttershy were born on the same day?
This only made half-sense to me, in Season One, Fluttershy stated she’s a year older than Pinkie, but in the episode Party of One, they only celebrated Pinkie’s birthday, Fluttershy wasn’t mentioned at all.

“Let me guess, is Party of One bothering you?” Rarity asked me.

“Stop reading my mind will you?” I ordered.

Rarity chuckled as I stood up, she then explained to me that the cartoon isn’t completely accurate to their lives, and only shows small snippets of reality. The Party of One episode was set in the day time, and in fact held Fluttershy’s party later on in the evening after Pinkie’s.

“Blimey… That’s awesome!” I cheered when I finally got over the shock of it.

“I know!” Pinkie chirped.

“We need a cake…” Fluttershy hissed.

“CAKE!” Pinkie screamed.

“I can go get one if you want?” Oliver offered.

“I’ll go with you.” I volunteered.

And with that, Oliver and I went off in the Land Rover to the local Tesco’s supermarket.

After a while finding two nice big cakes, I went to the cards aisle and found two My Little Pony themed cards, one of Pinkie, and one of Fluttershy; absolutely perfect.
We were just heading towards the checkout when Oliver turned to face me.

“Dude, I’ve been wondering, what’s up with Dash’s wings? They kinda have no purpose.”

“Ah…” I said dully.

I went on to explain how Ingeo had plucked her feathers while we were captives in Brazil, and for him never to mention it around her, as she was still traumatised from the event, and any reminder would cause her to break down.

“Well, if that’s the case, I have an idea…” He grinned.

I tilted my head.

“Well, after you died, we sold the chickens to help with repairing the house. So we’ve got loads of stuff left over, and we’ve still got loads of medicine for chickens that aid in feather growth.” He told me.

“That’s good, but if you hadn’t noticed, Rainbow Dash isn’t a chicken.” I replied bluntly.

“Oh har har, you dimwit. We mix the medicine with that Kuphilla Amanzi stuff.” He explained.

I scratched my chin.

“You know, that might just be an idea…” I hummed.

“Well, I did get an A-Star in science.” He grinned.

“You’ve said, multiple times.” I rolled my eyes.

“Just call me Mr Genius.” He chuckled.

We arrived home and Oliver took Fluttershy and Pinkie outside to help look for the chicken medicine, while I gathered the others to write in the birthday cards. I then hid the cards under my laptop and went downstairs to see Oliver.

“So, what do you think of the idea?” He asked Fluttershy as they entered the kitchen.

“I think it’s a good idea, but I’m not sure how she’ll handle having her wings talked about.” Flutters replied.

“Well, a moment’s emotional pain is better than waiting ten times as long to have the wings back.” He pointed out.

That was Rarity came out from behind me.

“What are we talking about?” She asked merrily.

“Fixing the gay one’s flappy things.” Oliver replied.

“I beg your pardon?”

“Healing Rainbow Dash’s wings.” I translated.

“Oh, how?”

“Well, Oliver’s got the idea of mixing feather growth medicine with Kuphilla Amanzi.” I told her.

“Because I’m a genius, right?” Coughed Oliver.

“You know, that’s actually a good idea!” Rarity nodded, impressed.

“So, shall I go and get her?” Oliver asked.

“I think it’s best that I do it, she’s very sensitive about the subject.” Rarity told him.

With that, Rarity headed upstairs, and we sat back and waited for Rarity to tell Dashie to come down.

The two of them returned a few minutes later, Dash looking at the floor, trying not to make eye-contact with anyone in the room.

“Heya Dash!” I smiled.

“Hey dude.” She huffed.

“Why the long face?” Oliver asked.

“You know why the long face.” She snapped.

“I thought she’d be more excited…” Fluttershy muttered.

“Oh, I didn’t actually tell her the plan.” Rarity said, putting a hoof to her mouth.

“Ah, well, Dashie, we’ve got a little surprise for you.” I told her.

“What?” She mumbled.

“Oliver’s got a nifty little idea, that could speed up the growth of your feathers!” I told her.

“What?” She repeated, but with a great big smile on her face.

“Well, I know Kuphilla’s cool and all, but I thought we could mix it with feather growth medicine, and it’d speed up the growth by like, ten times over! You could have your wings back in no time!” Oliver explained with a smile.

The cyan mare’s eyes brightened as her mouth grew into a massive grin.

“For real?”

“For real.” My brother chuckled.

“Ohmygosh!Ohmygosh!Ohmygosh!Ohmygosh!Ohmygosh!Ohmygosh!Ohmygosh!Ohmygosh!” She squealed, bouncing around.

We all began smiling as we watched Rainbow’s emotions overwhelm her, she was even tearing up!
Fluttershy took out the Kuphilla Amanzi and Oliver took out the medicine, before pouring some of each into a mixing bowl, Oliver mixed the substances together and handed me the bowl.
Rainbow Dash extended her wings, and I shivered as I saw how severe the plucking was; not a single feather was to be seen.
Her ‘wings’, (if they could be called that,) were like large fleshy fingers; the pale white skin had small red bumps where the feathers once were, the sight made me grit my teeth in anger, wishing I could kill Ingeo a second time over.
I dipped my hand into the thick gloopy mixture and slathered it onto her wing, making sure to cover every square inch of it; when I was finished she tucked her wing in and waited for the gloop to harden while I went to work on the other one.

“All done.” I sighed as I finished covering the base of the other wing.

She tucked it in, and we let the substance harden.

“Thanks dude.” Said Rainbow with a small half-smile.

She was clearly in a lot of emotional distress while I worked on her wings, I could only imagine what it could have felt like for her; I guessed for me that it’d be like losing the use my hands.
When the ‘Kuchicki Apecki’, (as Oliver called it), finally dried, we wrapped Dash’s torso in some bandages to keep the wings protected until they were healed.

“Now, if it works, your wings should be all good to fly in a couple of months.” Oliver told her.

“How’d you know that?” I asked him.

He replied by sticking a finger in the air and pulling a strange face.

“Science!”

I rolled my eyes, when Rainbow Dash suddenly started crying, we all looked at one another with confusion.

“Science isn’t that scary…” Oliver mumbled to himself.

“Dash, are you okay?” I asked her.

“Yeah I’m fine, I’m sorry.” She whimpered, running out of the room and heading upstairs.

We all stood there, taken aback, we'd assumed she'd be overjoyed.

“Shall… I talk to her?” Rarity asked curiously.

“I think we should just give her some space, I’ll talk to her later.” I answered.

Later happened.

“Hey…” I whispered as I slowly came into my mum’s bedroom, where Rainbow Dash was sitting alone.

“Oh, hey dude.” She mumbled.

“You alright?”

“Yeah, fine.”

“No you’re not.” I replied blankly, sitting next to her.

She didn’t say anything as I put an arm across her neck.

“Come on, talk to me. What’s up buttercup?”

She sighed.

“It’s just, in Brazil… Ingeo and Vladimir… What they did…” She started, and choked up.

I waited for her to continue.

“I’ve never been scared like that before, like, I thought they were going to kill me.
It was nothing like the fights I've had in Equestria, where we’re just fighting a magical bad guy and it’s over in a day or two, they weren’t trying to take over the world or anything, they just wanted to watch me suffering.
They laughed as the pulled out my feathers, they laughed!
They teased me and said how they were going to cut me up, cook me and eat me and stuff…
They were sick… They were SICK Callum!
It’s fucked me up dude… Brazil fucked me up in the head…”

I put my other arm around her and held her to my chest, she very quickly began to sob.

“Sshh… It’s okay… It’s okay… I got you…” I whispered as she cried.

Her breathing sped up and she began shaking in my arms, she was clearly panicking.

“It’s alright Dashie… It’s alright…”

She began to shake more violently and she kept thrashing her head backwards, accidentally headbutting my shoulder. That’s when I realised she was having a flashback of the incident, and was having an nervous breakdown.

“Rainbow, Rainbow Dash, listen to me.” I breathed.

“I can see it… I can see it!” She spluttered, almost head-butting me in the face.

I held her tighter, trying to calm her as much as I could.

“It’s not real Dashie. It’s not real.”

“No… Make it stop… S-stop, stop!” She stammered with her breathing now at an alarming speed.

“Rainbow Dash listen to me, it’s not real. It’s not real!” I said firmly.

Her legs started kicking as she went into complete meltdown, she was having a serious panic attack and had gone back into shock, I knew she would pass out if she didn’t slow down her breathing soon, so I did the one thing I could think of that might work.
I lifted her onto my lap and cuddled her tightly, one hand stroking the back of her head, as I began to sing.

“Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry… You don't know how lovely you are…
I had to find you, tell you I need you… Tell you I set you apart…
Tell me your secrets, and ask me your questions… Oh, let's go back to the start…”

I don’t know why I sang Coldplay, I suppose it was the calmest song I could think of on the spot.
Regardless, it seemed to be working, as Dashie’s shaking had died down to a shiver, and her breathing had slowed right down, so I decided to carry on.

“Running in circles, coming up tails… Heads on a science apart…
Nobody said it was easy… It's such a shame for us to part...
Nobody said it was easy… No one ever said it would be this hard...
Oh, take me back to the start…”

I was about halfway through the second verse of the song when Rainbow Dash opened her eyes and looked into mine, so I stopped singing my vision was slightly blurred as my eyes were watery, it was deeply upsetting to see such a confident character be this broken.

“Hey you…” I said softly.

Her lip trembled, before she began to sob in my arms.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry… I’m sorry…” She cried.

I held her head lightly and put my forehead to hers, making sure she knew she was safe and protected.

“Whatever for?” I asked.

“I’ve never had a panic attack with someone before; I don’t like this side of me being seen.” She choked.

“It’s okay Dash, really. I’ve had panic attacks before, I know what it’s like, don’t feel like you have to hide this, I’ve noticed even from the cartoon that you have anxiety, it’s nothing to be ashamed of. I promise.”

I had Rainbow Dash figured out, she was self-conscious and hid her insecurities behind her athletic and boisterous confidence, but was in fact, just as sensitive as Fluttershy, if not more so.

“You’re the best dude…” She sighed hoarsely.

I gave her another tight hug and wiped the tears from her eyes, she looked at me and smiled weakly.

“Come on you, sort yourself out, and let’s go join the others.” I ordered, tickling her chin.

She gave a spluttered laugh and grinned like an idiot as a blush began to show on her cheeks, I left the room and headed into Oliver’s room to find Pinkie annihilating Rarity and Oliver on Call of Duty again.

“She’s almost got a nuke! Stop her!” Oliver screamed, throwing his controller at me.

I quickly swapped to my best character class with a UMP, and quickly killed Rarity a few times to get a UAV drone and to ensure Pinkie wouldn’t get her first, I then threw a flash-bang into Pinkie’s little hideout, stormed in, only to get blown up by her claymore hidden in the doorway.

“Bollocks.”

Pinkie only had one kill left, so I decided to go full Taliban style, I pulled the pin on a grenade and rushed into the room.

“ALLAHU AKBAR!” I yelled as my player exploded next to her and killed her.

Pinkie snorted, and removed the controller from her mane.

“Giving up?” I teased.

She looked at me blankly, before prodding the controller, not even looking at it.

“Tactical Nuke incoming! It’s all over!” The game announced.

I looked to the screen, to see Pinkie’s character still alive on the ground, using the Last Stand Perk, which gave her an additional few seconds of life, and had shot Rarity's character with a pistol.

“Well, that happened.” Mumbled Rarity.

“Sometimes, I don’t even know why I question you…” I told Pinkie.

“Me neither, you know?” She agreed.

“No, I don’t know, that’s the point.”

The conversation was changed as Rainbow Dash entered the room with a weak smile.

“Hey, are you okay?” Rarity asked her.

“Yeah, I’m good.” She replied, looking from Rarity to me.

I smiled at her and gave her a small wink, letting her know I was there if she needed me.

“Great to know, now, can we stop this boring-ass talking and watch a film or something?” Oliver suggested.

“Good idea!” Applejack agreed.

We all gathered around the TV while Oliver picked out a film.

“What are you guys thinking? Horror? Action? Comedy?” He quizzed.

“Something light hearted that we can all watch, yeah?” I put forward.

“How about A Million Ways to Die in the West?”

“Sounds grand!” I grinned.

Oliver put in the DVD and we switched off the lights, ready to start the film. Dashie sat next to me and leant into my side; I had a feeling she would be stuck to me like glue for a few days now. I found Rainbow Dash and I very similar, we both were athletes with high fitness, yet had little self-confidence and had to cover it up with a big false-confident persona.
She covered up by being a show-off and pretending to be absolutely fearless. Much like I covered up by acting like an idiot, and rushing into things so I appeared to be brave and headstrong.
Regardless of everything that’s already happened, knew our adventure was far from over. I felt like Dashie and I would grow a lot closer; I just hoped that Rarity’s conspiracy wasn’t true, as I really didn’t want our friendship to be made awkward by a one-sided romance.

“So, what’s this movie about?” Applejack asked.

“You.” Oliver replied, chuckling.

“What do you mean?” She asked.

“Southerners, farmers, Texans, Yee haw, and all that.” He told her.

“Huh, interesting.” AJ replied, now looking forward to the film.

Oliver was just about to hit play, when Pinkie jumped up into the air and screamed.

“What the hell is wrong with you!?” Oliver barked.

“It’s the apocalypse! It’s the time of the living dead! Run for your lives!” She screamed as she bolted out of the room and into the bathroom, locking the door.

“I swear to fucking god, she’s either on drugs, or just completely broken.” Oliver muttered.

I patted Rainbow Dash’s shoulder and she took her weight off me so I could stand up; I left the room and went to the bathroom, and knocked on the door.

“Pinkie? Are you alright?” I asked.

“I’m twitching like a squirrel with Parkinson’s! Do I seem okay!?” She yelled.

I stood there for a good five seconds without uttering a word.

{What the hell has gotten into her…?} I thought.

“Twitch! Twitch’a twitch! Bad twitchy! Bad twitchy!” She bleated like a sheep.

Her Pinkie sense had apparently gone AWOL; suddenly there was a loud bang from downstairs.

“Callum! Was that you?” I heard Oliver call from his room.

“Nope…” I nervously called back.

Something was downstairs…

I went into my room, grabbed Wrinkleboom and loaded two slugs into the barrel, Rainbow Dash stuck her head into the room.

“What’s going on?” She asked.

“I’m about to find out…” I grumbled, clicking the barrel into place and holding the gun properly.

“Be careful…”

I nodded and headed to the stairs, there was complete silence, I gulped, took a deep breath, and eased down the stairs, tightening my grip on the shotgun. I went from the living room, to the dining room, to the kitchen, and found nothing; I checked the downstairs toilet and also found nothing.

{Maybe it was just the wind?} I thought to myself.

While every part of me wanted it to just be the wind, but I didn’t doubt Pinkie’s senses for a moment; I did another circuit of the house, slowly checking room to room, this time looking under the tables and thoroughly searching each room, including the small storage room under the stairs.
There appeared to be nothing at all, and I began to assume it might have been the wind after all. I lightened the grip on the shotgun and took a breath of relief, before the Scottish voice in my head decided to point something out.

{The back door is closed, as are the windows… So how can there be wind?}

I gulped, realising my conscience was right. I tightened my grip on Wrinkleboom once more, and did one last circuit of the house, in reverse this time, just double checking that I’d covered each room, and each nook and cranny.
Nothing.
I was about to call up the stairs to let the group know everything was fine, when I felt a knife come around me and push against my throat.

“Drop the gun…” A voice whispered.

I remained calm, and slowly bent down to place Wrinkleboom onto the floor; I stood up and the knife was taken away, I sighed a breath of relief and turned around to face the intruder.

“Callum! Is everything okay down there?” I heard Rarity call.

“Everything’s fine!” I called back, not moving a muscle and keeping eye-contact.

We stood there for a few seconds in silence, before finally the knife was put away.

“It’s not nice to scare people with knives, Twilight…”

Chapter Twenty-Six: The Dead City

Chapter Twenty Six - Wasteland Survival Guide

“Seriously Twilight, you’re here for less than an hour and you’re already being an asshat.” I growled.

“You were walking around with that gun; you could have shot me for all I knew.” She retorted defiantly.

“That’s because I didn’t know it was you, it could have been a robber for all I knew.” I told her.

“Well, whatever, I don’t like guns, I felt like I had to defend myself from you.”

“Twilight, I may not like you, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to kill you on sight.” I rolled my eyes.

“Well I was shot at in Chernobyl, so I just don’t like guns pointed in my direction, alright?” She snarled.

I tilted my head on one side.

“You were shot at? By who?”

“I don’t know, you dimwit; I was walking around when I heard gunshots and clumps of dirt around me burst up, so I left as quickly as I could.” She explained.

“You do understand there are no people in Chernobyl, right? It’s completely uninhabitable due to the radiation.” I pointed out.

“I don’t know, I didn't even get to look around the town, I teleported miles off course and had to walk for days just to reach the damn place, only for someone to start shooting at me as I arrived, thankfully he missed.” Twilight grumbled.

Twilight may be an arsehole, but I knew she wasn’t lying; her fur was dirty and her hooves were muddy, along with her mane being all over the place. Her eyes were wide and was evidently spooked, she had a genuine reason to be afraid and to threaten me with the knife, so I let it go, there was no need for yet another argument.

“You should rest.” I advised.

She looked at me blankly for a moment, clearly wanting to object to me, but the mare was exhausted and simply nodded.

“Come on, I’ll take you to the others and get you some food.” I said with a small smile, walking backwards towards the stairs.

“I would appreciate that…” She sighed, following me.

I turned around and headed up the stairs, Twilight tiredly lumbering behind me. I approached Oliver’s room and opened the door.

“Look who I found.” I grinned, opening the door fully.

“Hey guys.” Twilight mumbled, walking into the room.

“Heya Twiley!” Pinkie squeaked.

“Howdy Twi!” AJ greeted her, putting a foreleg over her neck.

The others all greeted her while I went downstairs to make Twilight a salad. In all honesty, I felt a bit sorry for her; she’s just gone to one of the most inhabitable places on Earth all on her own, and ended up almost getting shot. Bitchy or not, she was brave, and I admired that.

“Incoming faggot!” Oliver hollered as I entered the room.

“Ooh! You have food!” Pinkie squealed, running towards me.

“Sorry Pinks, this is for Twilight.” I apologised.

“Aww…” She moaned.

I went over to Twilight, who was sitting with Applejack in the corner of the room; I placed the salad at her hooves.

“Here, you must be starving.” I said sweetly.

“Thank you…” She mumbled, levitating some of the food and began to eat.

“Would you like me to run you a bath?” I offered.

She looked at me in thought, and then gave me with a face that said 'I want to say yes, but I don't want to admit it.

“I promise I won’t drown you, or hide a toaster in the water.” I teased.

She didn’t smile, but she raised her eyebrows in slight amusement.

“That would be nice…”

I waited a few seconds.

“Thank you…” She finished.

I dipped my head respectfully and left the room; I entered the bathroom and began to run the bath. I then came back into Oliver’s room and gave Twilight a childish smile.

“Would you like bubbles in your bath?”

“Please tell me you’re joking.” She groaned irritably.

“So… That’s a yes, right?”

“Just leave.” She ordered.

I stuck my tongue out and left the room again, chuckling.

After a while of waiting for the bath to fill, and checking the temperature was just right, I came back in to Oliver’s room to find they were all still watching A Million Ways to Die in the West, and much to my surprise, Twilight was actually enjoying it. The film was about halfway through and at a point where there was a musical about the advantages of having a moustache. The ponies found the song very amusing and for the first time, I saw Twilight genuinely giggle, and it was fucking adorable.

{There may be hope for her yet...} My conscience muttered.

“Hey Twi, hate to burst your bubble, but your bath is ready.” I told her, not intending the pun.

“Alright.” She replied, getting up.

She left the room and I showed her to the bathroom, where I left her to lock the door and get comfortable.

“What did I say about bubbles!?” She growled from inside.

“You didn’t say no!” I laughed.

“Incompetent... Dimwitted... Imbecile…” She muttered quietly, I only just heard her through the door.

I couldn't help but smile to myself and went downstairs to pour myself a glass of milk; I came back upstairs to hear a small splash, followed by a moan of absolute ecstasy from the bathroom.

“Dang… Bitch really needed that bath…” I quietly muttered to myself.

{Aye, perhaps too badly.} My conscience agreed.

I went into Oliver’s room and watched the rest of the movie with everyone else, enjoying my last day in England before we head off to Chernobyl, I had a feeling I wouldn't be able to come home again after this...

One awesome film and a barrel of belly laughter later, we turned off the TV and headed back into my room; on the way I heard Twilight calling for some assistance, I went over to the door and gave it a knock.

“You alright in there Twi?” I asked.

“I need a towel.”

I couldn’t help but lightly chuckle to myself.

“Can’t you just use your magic?” I suggested.

“I have to save my mana, you tool. Otherwise we won’t reach Chernobyl.” She explained.

“Hm, good point; hang on.” I said and grabbed a towel from the boiler unit.

I opened the bathroom door and gave Twilight the towel, she dipped her head respectfully.

“Need help drying off while I'm here?” I teased, sticking my tongue out playfully.

“Don't make me hurt you.” She answered.

“As you wish; we’re in my bedroom when you’re done.” I told her and left the room.

I came into my room to find Rainbow Dash and Applejack laughing with one another.

“What’s so funny?” I asked cheerfully.

“Oh, don’t worry, just something we watched on your laptop while you were at your funeral.” Dash giggled.

“And what was that?” I quizzed.

The two of them continued to giggle loudly, before Rainbow Dash whispered something into AJ’s ear and they both burst into laughter.

“Seriously, what did you watch?” I chuckled, finding their laughter contagious.

“Applejack! What are you doing!? You can’t eat all those fucking apples!” Dash growled, pushing Applejack.

Applejack proceeded to pull a horrifying face and stick her hoof into Dashie's face.

“Fuck you, I can’t eat all these apples!” She spat.

She then went on to mimic stuffing her face with apples, making loud munching noises. The two of them collapsed onto the ground in fits of laughter.

“Oh dear god no…” I whispered hoarsely.

They'd watched a horrifying video online known as 'Apple.Mov', a cartoon parody of MLP made by a cartoonist called Max Gilardi.
Thankfully the crude humour of the video was abolished as Twilight walked into the room.

“Okay everyone, playtime over, we’ve got an orb shard to find.” She announced enthusiastically.

“Well, you’re in a good mood.” Dash pointed out, surprised.

“You’d be surprised how relaxing a hot bath is.” She replied.

Everyone in the room exchanged positive looks as we had potentially found the cure for Twilight’s bitchiness.

“Make no mistake; I still loathe your kind.” She said bluntly to me.

Or not…

{Well, at least she doesn’t just hate me specifically.} I thought merrily.

{Well, if it comes as any consolation, I hate you.} My conscience said with glee.

It took a lot of effort not to reply out loud and end up looking like a nutter in front of everyone, I ignored the Scottish entity in my head and focused on Twilight and the rest of the group.

“Now, I suggest we all restock our supplies and head out as quickly as possible.” She ordered.

Without a word, we went around the house, taking the supplies we needed. I had to completely refill my rucksack after the dicks in Brazil had looted everything.

I went into the kitchen to find all the crisps were gone.

“Pinkie!” I called.

“Yeeaaasss?” I heard her call back.

“Did you eat all the crisps?”

“They were Quavers okay!?”

I facepalmed, and just took all the tinned foods, such as beans, soup, and tuna. After that I went to Oliver’s room and got the gun belt and pistol holster from him; I then went into my room and changed into some dark blue jeans, a forest green plaid shirt, and a dark green baseball cap with a beige brim; I topped off the look with some dark brown hiking boots, they were strong and sturdy, yet flexible and comfy.

“Pretty badass there bro.” Oliver commented as I put on the gun belt.

I turned to face my brother as he entered the room, holding a large knife.

“Here, I thought you might need this.” He offered.

“Sorry bro, already got one.” I denied, pulling out Vladimir’s knife, which was bigger than Oliver’s.

“Sweet! Where’d you get that!?”

“The infamous Vladimir Kikashkov; I call it Kroksbane.” I told him.

“Crocsbane?”

“Yeah, but spelt with the letter K, in honour of Vladimir.”

“Why Kroksbane?” He asked.

“Because I killed a bunch of crocodiles with it.” I replied, looking smug.

I sheathed Kroksbane in the gun belt, as it had a knife slot next to Ingeo’s pistol. With a little skip I went to the other side of the room and picked up Wrinkleboom.

“You know, I’ve got a backpack with a slot for that.” Oliver smiled.

“You have an item of clothing for everything.” I chuckled.

He ran into his room and came out with a backpack similar to the old one, but it was slightly smaller and made of leather, on the sides were two loops for holding things. He passed me the backpack and I put it on, attaching Wrinkleboom to the side.

“Dude… No fucking way…” Oliver grinned.

“What?” I asked.

“You look just like that bloke from The Last of Us; that Joel fella!” He pointed out.

“Who?”

“Oh yeah, while you were dead I got a PlayStation for a few months to play it, it's such a good game. You look like a very young version of the main character.” He told me.

“Fair enough.” I smiled.

“Guys; time to go!” Twilight called from behind me.

The others came upstairs and we all tightened our bags, it was time. Oliver put a hand on my shoulder and sighed.

“Be careful out there little bro…”

“I’ll do my best.” I replied with a smirk.

We all walked towards Twilight, who was lying on my bed; when Oliver stopped me.

“This might be the last time I see you…” He murmured.

I nodded with a sigh.

“Can I take a picture of you guys, before you go?” He asked.

“No.” Twilight growled.

“It’s just for me, I swear! Not another living soul will see it!”

“I said, no.” She spat.

“Please! He’s my little bro… I just want one picture, just one…” He begged.

After a second’s thought, Twilight sighed.

“Okay, okay, you can take one.”

Oliver reached for his phone, and the seven of us gathered around into a tight clump.

“Say cheese!” My brother sang as he pointed the phone at us.

We all smiled and looked at the phone as he took the picture, and then showed us.

“Awesome!” I grinned.

“A photo full of gay, that’s what it is.” He teased, putting his phone away.

“Right, let’s go.” I said with a deep breath.

Twilight hopped off my bed and her horn began to glow.

“My mana will be very low after this trip, so don’t expect me to be a miracle worker.” She told the group.

Her horn grew brighter as she closed her eyes and gritted her teeth, I noticed her body tense up and I could tell this spell was difficult to cast, even for a unicorn of her level. The light emitting from her horn was almost blinding, when she turned around and fired it at the mirror on my wardrobe, the mirror flashed a bright white light, before going back to normal.

“Did it work?” Dash asked.

I walked over to the mirror, and poked it; only to have my hand almost sucked through it as my finger went right through it, the entire mirror wobbled like jelly and glowed purple for a moment.

“Yeah, it worked.” I answered.

“Well, I guess this is goodbye.” Oliver muttered.

I went over to him and gave him one last hug.

“Chin up broski, when this mission's over, I'll see you again.” I told him, smiling warmly.

“Yeah…” He murmured.

I let him go, and took a step back, the ponies did the same and let me go first.

“Well, here goes nothing… ALLONS-Y!!!” I yelled at the top of my voice, charging at the mirror.

I dived into it headfirst and everything turned white and my body felt weightless, and then I blacked out.

Before I awoke, I felt a sharp pain in my chest, followed by the feeling of my entire torso caving in, my ears started ringing loudly as I began to regain consciousness; suddenly my vision came back to me and I woke up coughing. Without warning Fluttershy hugged me tightly, I looked around to see the six crowded around me looking worried.

“Oh thank Celestia…” Rarity sighed.

“Are you okay?” Fluttershy asked me, looking into my eyes.

“Yeah… What happened?” I asked in shock.

“Well, you kind of, nearly died.” Applejack told me nervously.

“What!?”

“The portal needed a moment to configure itself, you jumped in too early and it took a few seconds to gather your atomic structure before reassembling you, momentarily stopping your heart and breathing; you’re lucky not to have brain damage.” Twilight told me.

I gulped nervously.

{Thanks for letting me know beforehand.} I thought angrily.

“You’re also very lucky Fluttershy knows CPR.” Twilight finished.

I looked to my side to see Flutters looking at me with a weak smile, slightly out of breath; I nodded my head in thanks and slowly stood up, Rainbow Dash came to my side to help.

“It’s alright, I’m okay.” I told her.

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

She sighed with relief and head-butted my hand.

“Dude, don’t do that again; you scared the heck out of me…” She said, trying to hide her emotion.

“I’ll try not to.” I replied, stroking the side of her face.

I found it rather strange, even though I was close to death, I wasn’t fazed or scared by it; I guess my time in Brazil had hardened me more than I thought. With that brief panic over, I looked around to see we were in a shack, only just big enough to house all six of us. I looked outside and gained a bearing of my surroundings, and was rather taken aback by what I saw; I knew how uninhabitable Chernobyl was, but I couldn't comprehend this. Everything was just dust and dead plants, the few trees were withered and black, it looked just like a scene from the game Fallout, it was just...
Wasteland…

“Jesus…” I breathed.

“It’s awful, isn’t it?” Rarity sighed.

In the foggy distance was a large town, which I guessed Twilight had come from.

“So, what’s the deal with radiation in the area?” I asked her.

“This shack is radiation free, along with the surrounding area, but the town's full of it.” She told me.

“And where’s the orb shard?”

“I located it on the far side of town, there’s a big factory with two great spires, the orb’s in there.”

“That’s the power plant, that’s what caused the whole disaster.” I explained.

“When did this happen?” Rarity asked me.

“Back in Nineteen Eighty-Six.” I told her.

“So, how many years ago?”

“Twenty eight.” I answered.

“Well, shit.” Applejack muttered, rubbing the back of her neck.

I looked at her with confusion, she looked down and started to explain.

“Well you see…”

“Holy crap!” Dashie interrupted, catching onto the conversation.

“What is it?” I asked them.

“Well, when the Titan’s Orb was sent here, it was done in secret and was only discovered twenty seven days later, and Princess Celestia chose us to retrieve it the day afterwards.” She told me.

“So…” I hummed, figuring it out.

“Oh gosh…” Rarity gasped, also understanding.

“The orb was sent to Earth twenty eight years ago.” I mumbled.

If the orb came here twenty eight years ago, and was inside the power plant, there was only one explanation.
The Titan’s Orb had caused Chernobyl…

“Oh Callum, I’m so sorry…” Rarity murmured.

I took a couple seconds to process the information, before turning to Rarity.

“Don’t worry, it wasn’t your fault. Besides, I wasn’t even born when it happened, so I don’t really have the right to be upset by it. It was a tragedy, but Earth's moved on and recovered from it, we just steer clear of the area due to the radiation left over.” I told her.

She hummed to herself as she thought about my opinion; meanwhile Applejack was talking to Twilight about something, I went over to see what the subject was.

“You two alright?” I asked.

“We’re just thinking about what to do with Pinkie and Fluttershy, it’s their birthday tomorrow and I don’t think it should be spent in radiation and danger.” Applejack told me.

“Perhaps they could stay here?” I suggested.

They frowned, not sure what to think of the idea.

“In all honesty, we don’t all need to go out there just for the orb shard; Flutters, Pinkie, and Rarity could stay here and enjoy the birthday, while we look for the shard. That way you don’t have to use as much mana on anti-radiation spells, with Fluttershy and Pinkie being able to enjoy their birthday on top.” I explained.

“You know, that’s actually a good idea.” Applejack agreed.

“Hm, you have a point;” said Twilight, “but I don’t want them left without someone strong to protect them.”

She turned to face Applejack.

“Applejack, I want you to stay here and keep them safe.”

A smile lit up the farm pony’s face.

“Fine by me Sugarcube; I sure as hay don’t want to go into that creepy place.” She replied.

The three of us went to tell the others of the plan, and they were all happy with it.

“Then it’s settled, Callum, Rainbow Dash and I will go into the town and retrieve the shard.” Twilight announced.

We exchanged a few hugs and were wished good luck, and we began to prepare ourselves; I took some shotgun cartridges out of my back and put them in my pocket, along with loading Wrinkleboom just in case. Rainbow Dash took off her bag and left it with the group to lighten the load; after that, we were good to go.

“Sorry we’re going to miss your birthdays.” Dash sighed to Pinkie and Fluttershy.

“It’s alright, we’ll save you some cake.” Flutters beamed.

I looked at Twilight to see she was impatiently waiting to get a move-on.

“Right, let’s boogie.” I spoke, getting Dash’s attention.

She nodded and we all headed away from the shed and towards the town, looking back only once…

“Hold up, I’m detecting radiation.” Twilight ordered as we approached a few farm buildings.

We stopped and waited for her next set of instructions.

“I’m going to use a spell called Skinlock, it reinforces your body with an extremely thin layer of resistant fibre, it resists radiation and most types of poison. It doesn't wear off until you something breaks your skin, from there the radiation can start to leak in, so whatever you do, don’t get cut or scratched by anything.” She explained.

“Don’t get cut, got it.” I nodded.

“Being a human, you have an advantage as you wear clothes, but regardless, watch yourself, because I don’t have much mana left, so I can’t cast it more than once, got it?”

I simply nodded.

“What if it’s just a small cut, like a splinter?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“I can repair that if I act quick enough, but don’t get any large injuries that properly break the skin.” She replied.

“Got it.” Dashie confirmed.

With the brief out of the way, Twilight lit up her horn and cast her spell onto Dashie, and then onto me. Unlike most of her spells, this sensation felt cold and I could feel a slight pressure on my skin before the feeling wore off.

“Right.” Twilight started.

“Left.” I interrupted.

She frowned and looked at me.

“Don’t do that.”

We walked past the farm buildings and reached a road leading into the town, we walked down the middle of the road in single file, with me at the front.

"Look at this place..." Rainbow Dash muttered.

"Fifty-thousand people used to live here... Now it's a ghost town..." I sighed.

“Do you think anything will ever be able to live and grow here again?” Dash asked me.

“No idea, the radiation has been disappearing at an extremely slow rate, but I doubt anything will be able to thrive here for at least a few hundred years.” I replied.

“Dang…” She mumbled.

We kept walking for quite some time, when I started to get the feeling I was being watched; I slowed down.

“What’s the matter?” Twilight asked.

“It’s quiet… Too quiet…” I muttered.

“I know what you mean.” She agreed.

We kept walking through the dead street when we heard a noise ahead, it sounded like a tin can being stepped on.

“Quick, move.” I hissed.

We all quietly ran to the side of the road and waited, not daring to move a muscle, we waited for a good minute before we kept moving along the street, when we heard another noise from further down the street.

“Where’s it coming from?” Dash whispered.

“If it weren’t foggy in the distance, I’d tell you.” I replied.

The fog wasn't too thick, and I could see a good fifty metres ahead of me, but it still caused a very tense atmosphere. We were just about to keep moving when I heard something very unsettling... A growl…

“There’s… Something… Over there…” Twilight whimpered.

I waited silently, before I heard a faint click to my right, and then HISS!
The bullet whizzed over my head and hit the bricks of the building on my left side, I jumped out of my skin and fell back into Twilight.
We were being shot at.

“What do we do!?” She squealed in fear.

“Into the building!” I ordered.

We turned to the first door we reached and I shoulder rammed it, breaking the lock and opening the door; we rushed in and ran into the first room, a kitchen.

“You weren’t kidding about the sniper…” I panted.

“No… You don’t say?” She spat sarcastically.

“He’s got a silencer too, sneaky bastard.” I grumbled.

I bit my lip, thinking about what to do, when I noticed Dash had left the room.

“Dash?” I hissed out of the doorway.

No answer.

“Rainbow Dash.” I said louder.

Still no answer, Twilight gulped; I left the room and looked into the living room, where Rainbow Dash was standing with her back to me, I marched up to her, annoyed that she’d walked off.

“We stay together Dash, alright?” I growled.

She didn’t even look at me, and kept looking at the ground, completely petrified; I looked at the ground, and realised what she was looking at. Lying in the corner of the room was a human corpse, it was only halfway through decomposing and had green and black skin, the chest cavity and belly were gone and the rotting organs were visible; I wrinkled my nose in disgust and stood in Dashie’s way, making sure she couldn’t see it any longer.

“Focus.” I ordered, clicking my fingers in her face.

She shook her head and looked up at me.

“How many people died like this?” She muttered.

“Thousands, I imagine.” I replied with a glum look.

“Fuck…”

I put my hands on her shoulders.

“Stay focused, we need to find the shard.”

She nodded and we re-joined Twilight, who was looking for a key to the back door; I rolled my eyes and walked towards the door.

“This, is, Sparta.” I moaned dryly.

I kicked the door down with one swift front kick, and walked out into a grassy courtyard; the building turned out to be a block of flats. I didn’t bother looking back as I headed to a gate on the other side of the courtyard.

“Do you know where you’re going?” Twilight asked.

“Yeah, away from that fucking sniper.” I growled.

She couldn’t argue with that logic, and followed me to the gate, which thankfully was unlocked.

“Ladies first?” I joked.

“Move.” Twilight hissed.

I smirked and left the courtyard, we crept across the road and into an old barbers shop on the other side, luckily the door was completely missing and we could walk straight through; inside was rather tidy for the given state of the town, I guess all barbers had standards, even in death.

“Wait, do you hear that?” Twilight whispered.

I crouched down and listened carefully, and that’s when I heard it; the same growl from earlier.

“It’s following us.” I breathed.

“What do we do?” Dash asked.

I was done hiding; I stood up and took Wrinkleboom from the side of my backpack.

“We teach it a lesson.” I said gruffly.

I marched out of the barbers and held the shotgun tightly; I looked from left to right down the road and saw absolutely nothing. Twilight and Rainbow Dash stood opposite to me, making sure they had my back.

“We know you’re here poppet!” I sang, pointing the shotgun in every direction.

The growl, answered.

“Over there, look!” Dash gasped.

I turned to see a hooded figure stood next to a van, tilting its head at me, causing Rainbow to gulp.

“Is it human?” She asked.

“It looks human.” Twilight mumbled.

The figure squatted down and growled loudly, before jumping up onto the van like a cat, landing perfectly and continued to stare at me. There was no way a human would be able to jump that high with such ease.

“That sure as hell isn’t human…” I growled, tightening my grip on the shotgun.

The hooded creature crouched low and began to growl, I had a feeling it was going to attack. Without warning there was another loud hiss and the creature’s head suddenly jolted sideways and it fell off the side of the van hitting the ground heavily; it appeared the sniper had shot him.

“What the heck?” Dashie said with surprise.

“The sniper got him.” I told her.

“Where is it?” She asked.

“By the looks of things, on the block of buildings at the end of that road.” I said, pointing down towards the dead creature.

“So…”

“So we move around the bugger, and go that way.” I butted in, pointing down the road in the opposite direction.

We headed down the road, before I heard something far more unsettling than the growling and the sniper put together; the sound of someone crying. The three of us continued cautiously, trying to find the source; we didn’t have to look far as we turned the corner to see someone standing in the middle of the street, hunched over and crying to himself.

“Should we talk to him?” Rainbow suggested.

“Don’t be stupid.” Twilight hissed quietly, but not quiet enough…

The person turned around, and I was horrified by what I saw. The person was in a straightjacket, his skin a greenish brown, and his mouth took up the majority of his face; his eyes protruded from the side of his head and swivelled around to face us like a chameleon’s, the second he saw us he stopped crying and started to grunt angrily.

“Back away…” I mumbled.

We started to walk back, and he started following; we quickened our pace and he grunted louder.

“Stay back.” I warned the creature.

Wrong move…
The second I had spoken, the freak threw its head back and screamed at the top of its lungs; the sound was almost deafening as this thing screamed like an air-raid siren, I gritted my teeth as my ears began ringing painfully. Twilight and Rainbow Dash dropped to their knees and covered their ears with their hooves.

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!” I yelled and pointed Wrinkleboom at the creature.

It began running at me, still screaming, and I was left no choice but to pull the trigger. The sound of the shotgun was equal to the creature’s screams, the kickback however was very powerful and the gun almost leapt out of my arms. I looked to see the creature twitching on the ground, now silent.

“What… The fuck… Was that!?” Rainbow Dash shouted with terror.

Before I could answer, I heard screams and roaring from all around us. I heard a window smash and I turned to see someone charging at me, growling and yelling gibberish, I fired my second shot and he hit the ground dead.

“Oh shit… Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!” Twilight began to whimper as the surrounding yells and screams grew louder.

I heard more windows break and the ground began to shake ever so slightly; I looked back towards the dead screaming creature to see about thirty more people sprinting towards us.

“Back to the courtyard, NOW!” I shouted to the others.

“How many are there?” Dash asked.

I glanced back once and found the thirty people had become over a hundred.

“RUN LIKE FUCKING HELL!” I screamed in her face.

That seemed to answer her question pretty well as she turned around and bolted back towards the gate, Twilight cried out in sheer terror as more and more of these creatures came pouring out of every doorway and window in sight and began sprinting towards us. We were almost at the gate when three of the creatures emerged from the building in front of us and blocked out path; without a moment’s hesitation I pulled out Ingeo’s pistol and shot them. We rushed through the gate and I pulled the bar across to lock it, just as the horde approached and collided with it; the entire gate screeched as the metal bars were bent by the sheer force of hundreds of bodies hitting it at once. The savages stuck their hands through the bars of the gate and desperately clawed at us, there were five-hundred at least.

“That gate’s not going to hold if they keep pushing!” Rainbow Dash said with worry.

I looked to my left to see a flight of stairs that went all the way to the top of the building.

“Up those stairs, go!” I ordered.

The three of us shot up the stairs and went up all six floors, we burst out of the fire exit and onto the large rooftop; I turned around and slammed the fire door shut, sealing it with a nearby pipe. I then pulled two more rounds out of my pocket and reloaded Wrinkleboom; we then waited it out.
After a while, nothing happened, and we assumed the creatures had given up.

“That was too fucking close…” Dash panted, her eyes wide as dinner plates.

“I thought that was the end.” Twilight muttered shakily.

I looked over the edge of the building to see way more than five-hundred of these creatures, there were at least a thousand. They were now aimlessly wandering around as though they’d completely forgotten about us.

“What are they?” Dash asked, more to herself than anything.

The rotting skin, the mutated bodies, the screaming and shouting gibberish. These monsters were beyond mad; they were mindless, crazed, feral, they were savage.
After a moment’s thought, I could only describe them with a single word…

“Zombies…” I muttered.

Chapter Twenty-Seven: Post-Mortem Promenade

Chapter Twenty Seven - Does This Look Infected to You?

“Zombies!?” Twilight repeated, shaking like a leaf.

“Well, I guess that explains why Pinkie was yelling about the apocalypse earlier.” Dash mumbled.

“Oh yeah!” I recalled.

{Note to self, always trust the Pinkie sense…} My conscience muttered.

“So, what now?” Twilight asked.

“Make our way above the rooftops.” I answered.

“But how do we cross the street?”

“Climb the old electric cables?” I suggested.

“I think I’ll stick with life.” She growled.

“Then think of something better, smartass.” I spat back.

Without warning, there was the sound of an ear-splitting bang! The sniper had removed the silencer…
We looked over the edge of the building to see the zombies all running down the road, towards the sound of the gunshot; there was another BANG, and a zombie’s head exploded. The bullet went straight through and killed the zombie behind it as well.

“Quick, cross the road while they’re distracted.” I ordered.

I unblocked the door and we descended the stairs as quickly as possible, when we reached the road all the zombies were down the far end and we were clear to cross; we went back into the old barber’s shop and used the back door to find an alley. We crept down the alley and used the first turning to arrive at the next large road, four zombies were lumbering around in the road; while they would be easy to kill, I didn’t want to use my gun in case it attracted more of them.

“Wait here.” I told the girls.

I slowly walked into the road, making sure I wasn’t being seen, I crouched behind a car and noticed a zombie coming my way; I waited patiently as it approached the vehicle and stopped, inhaling hoarsely and twitching. It then turned around to walk away and I took my chance, I came up behind him and lunged forward, wrapping my arm around the creature’s throat, constricting it. The zombie thrashed around in attempt to shake me off, but I leant back and let its weight assist in choking it. It continued to struggle for a good ten seconds, wriggling and trying to claw at my head, before it finally went limp in my arms.
I laid the zombie on the ground and moved over to the next, I was about to repeat the choking technique when it turned around and saw me; before it had the chance to make a sound I punched it right in the throat and rugby tackled it to the ground, now I was on top of the zombie I could choke it with my hands. I took no hesitation as I pushed down as hard as I could, making sure it was unable to breathe or make a sound, it took slightly longer than the first zombie and the struggle lasted for a good minute before its thrashing and clawing became more and more tiresome and eventually ceased all together and died into a small twitching. I stood up and wiped my brow before moving on to the next zombie, and the next, and the next.

And the next…

I had successfully killed all except one zombie, and was about to kill the last one when it turned to face me, I almost cried out in shock as I saw its face. The creature had no eyes, but instead a large set of antenna, its head was covered in a fleshy fungus, it genuinely looked like it had two great big mushroom caps stuck on its forehead. The human jaw has split in two to create an extra set of sharp teeth down where the chin would normally be; the mouth itself had extended out, creating a giant set of fleshy pincers.
I stood absolutely still, and was amazed to find the mutant couldn’t see me at all and had no clue I was there. That’s when it started to making odd clicking sounds; it sounded a lot like a Predator.

{Don’t… Fucking... Move…} I thought.

The mutant swung its head around, continuing the clicking sound, it then walked off in the other direction; I quietly made my way back to Rainbow Dash and Twilight.

“What the heck is up with that one?” Dash asked, looking at the clicking creature.

“It can’t see.” I replied.

“Echolocation.” Twilight mentioned.

“Aaahhh…” I hummed in understanding.

“What?” Rainbow Dash quizzed.

“Echolocation,” I repeated, “they see using sound.”

“So, like a bat?”

“Exactly like a bat.”

I decided to test this by picking up a brick and throwing it down the road, near the zombie. As the brick hit the ground, the creature screeched and ran to the brick, swinging its arms around violently; it then stopped and swung its head around, clicking loudly.

“That’s freaky.” Dash mumbled.

"I'm going to call them tickers." I hummed in response.

“C’mon, let’s move.” Twilight ordered.

We left the alley and moved up the road to the turning to find a load of houses, creating a dead end.

“What now?” Asked Twilight.

“Cut through a house, leave through the garden.”

She nodded, and we moved to the closest house on the right, the front door was missing which made things easier. I entered first and looked around, before walking into the kitchen. The room looked empty; this area seemed to be clear.

“Alright guys, it’s clear.” I told the others.

They walked into the hallway when Twilight suddenly yelped with terror, before I knew what hit me I was shoulder rammed forward and smacked into the wall, I turned just in time as the zombie grabbed me and head-butted me in the face. I grunted in pain and held the creature back as it lunged forward and tried to bite my neck. I looked into its eyes and saw nothing but death and hate.

“Callum!” Dash cried desperately.

The zombie was strong, he pushed harder and harder in attempts to reach my neck, I had to push him back with all my might; his face was almost touching mine now as he growled and yelled nonsense, biting thin air as he snapped his bared teeth. I gritted my teeth in desperation as he got closer and closer to my neck, his teeth clicking loudly as he bit at me savagely.

“Get, the fuck… OFF ME!” I roared and pushed back with my last burst of energy.

The zombie was forced a step back, where I was able to quickly hop to the left and grab the back of its head and slam it into the wall; it fell to the ground, dazed. I took no hesitation as my survival instincts kicked in, I pinned the creature down and grabbed the closest thing in my vicinity, which happened to be a desk lamp. I proceeded to smack it in the face, over and over, I didn’t stop until it had stopped gurgling, which by then I had caused its face to cave inwards. I threw the lamp aside and slouched back and panted heavily, worn out.

After a moment’s rest I was brought back to Earth by Rainbow Dash as she prodded my shoulder with a hoof.

“Are you okay?”

I looked up to her and nodded, although I didn’t quite feel it; I looked back at the body and realised how savagely I’d beaten the zombie, I had gone all out on him and left his face completely unrecognisable. I looked at my hands to see them dripping with thick dark red blood. My hands were shaking with shock and adrenaline.

“Dude, we should go.” Dash advised.

I wiped some of the blood off onto the zombie’s chest and stood up, gulping; Twilight walked past me and roamed the kitchen, she came back with a tea towel and gave it to me.

“Use this.”

“Thank you.” I replied quietly.

I took the tea towel and properly removed the rest of the blood, before covering the zombie’s face with it out of respect. I headed through the kitchen and out of the back door into the garden; luckily the fence was low and we were all able to climb over it with ease.

We headed across an empty road to a large town square, in the middle of the square was a large bronze statue of a man, stood up straight with a machine-gun in his hand, which was raised up above his head in some form of salute.

“Whoa, that looks badass…” Dash mumbled.

“Agreed…” I hummed.

We crossed the small road in front of us and approached the statue, when we heard shouting to the right of us; we turned to see eight zombies running in our direction.

“Quick, shoot them!” Twilight ordered.

“I can’t, the sound will attract more!” I growled back.

“Do we run?” Dash asked, full of panic.

“No…” I replied darkly, smirking.

I withdrew Kroksbane and glared at the closest zombie to me, it was about twenty metres away; I took a deep breath as I began to slowly walk towards it. The half-dead woman screeched as she ran full pelt at me; she was about to shoulder ram into me when I ducked and thrust the knife into her gut and yanked it upwards, mutilating her organs and multiple arteries, blood sprayed out of her torso and she was dead before she hit the ground.
By the time I was ready for the next zombie, it was already in front of me, he lifted a hand to strike me, and I quickly stabbed him in the throat and jumped to the side to avoid his swipe; in a matter of seconds he lost too much blood and dropped to the ground like a sack of potatoes.
The next zombie was about to reach me when I heard a loud hiss and half of the zombie’s head decided to explode before my very eyes; the sniper was here, and had once again attached his silencer.

The bullets reached the zombies before they could reach me, the rifle must have been semi-automatic; I looked up to see the barrel of the rifle pointing directly at me from the top window of a four story building. Without warning the gun went off and I dropped to the ground, thinking it had fired at me. I then heard the sound of a body hitting the ground and turned to see one of the jumping hooded zombies lying on the ground, dead.

“Thank you!” I called up to the sniper.

There was no response, and the gun was pulled away and disappeared from sight; I thought the sniper was gone when without warning a package flew out the window at me; I caught it and opened it up to find a pistol silencer for Ingeo's gun.

“No fucking way…” I breathed.

Somehow, the sniper knew I had this exact type of pistol; from this gift I could assume he was trying to help us, and signalled the ponies to come over. They joined me and we entered the building together, the ground floor was an old restaurant; I turned to face Rainbow Dash and put a hand on her shoulder.

“I want you to wait down here and keep a lookout; I don’t want any zombies trapping us upstairs.” I told her.

“You got it.” She nodded.

Twilight and I then went through the back door of the restaurant and found a stairwell to the second floor; we headed up the stairs and into the next room to find a series of open-plan rooms, two kitchens, a laundry room, and a few toilet stalls; the stairs to the second floor were on the other side of these rooms.

“Second floor then.” I smiled at Twi and walked forward.

On my third step, the floorboard under me creaked; that’s when I heard a shrill screech and a zombie ran into the room. I didn’t move a muscle as I recognised another blind, bug-faced ticker.
It began clicking to gain a sense of the room around it, before three more of them entered the room and began searching aimlessly. I looked back to Twilight and put a finger to my lips to signal her to be quiet, and then beckoned her to follow me; she nervously shuffled over to me as the creatures hunted for us. We moved ever so slowly on our knees to prevent making any sound at all; when another floorboard creaked beneath Twilight. One of the creatures hoarsely inhaled and began clicking frantically as it paced over to Twilight, she moved as quickly as she could and began shaking with terror; the creature approached us and stopped right in front of us.

{You… Ugly, mother-fucker…} I thought as I stared at the beast.

Its head was completely deformed into something similar to a hammerhead shark, its long antenna wriggling around as it attempted to feel for us; it opened its mouth and began clicking to build another map of the room, and I could see its hideous tongue as it extended out to create the clicking sound. The tongue was split down the middle and the forked tips had hardened, making vile little black barbs.

It would have been so easy to remove Kroksbane and quickly shiv the creature in the neck, but I didn’t want to risk anything and waited it out. The mutant leaned forward and began to click even louder, the antenna almost brushed Twilight and she shivered nervously; which only told the creature that someone was there; it hissed and clenched its fists, when a floorboard creaked in a different room and it turned around and walked off to investigate the sound.
Twilight gulped and took a breath of relief; I then put a hand on her shoulder and rubbed it with my thumb, comforting her. She nodded at me to assure me she was okay, and we continued to another room. On a shelf in the next room was a glass bottle, I picked it up and smirked; I had a little plan. I beckoned Twilight to follow me as I tiptoed closer to the stairwell to the third floor, and just as I expected there was another bug-faced freak in the way. I backed up to the wall beside me and threw the bottle into the room we had just come from and it smashed loudly on the floor; every mutant on the second floor began screeching and poured into the room like ants, one whizzed right past us and we quickly ran to the exit. I burst through the door and almost fell to an untimely death, due to the lack of railings on the stairwell; Twilight shut the door behind us and turned around to face me, and screamed.

“LOOK OUT!”

I turned around to see another clicking freak charging down the stairs towards me, its large pincers snapping viciously as it approached me.

“Fuck yourself!” I growled and kicked it square in the chest.

The creature flew off the stairwell and into the alleyway bellow, hitting the ground with a loud thud and breaking its neck.

“Well, that’s that.” Twilight murmured, still recovering from the earlier shock.

I gave her a weak smile and headed up the stairs, the rusty supports moaned painfully as we reached the third floor; I doubt they would hold our weight for too long. I pulled out my knife and entered the room, only to find…
Fuck all.
No people, no weapons, just a make-shift tripod by the open window; the sniper was nowhere to be seen.

“Where did he go?” Twilight asked.

“Not a clue.” I muttered.

We went into the other rooms on the third floor to find a series of bedrooms and a trashed library; the books had been ruined, and the few readable ones were all in Ukrainian so there wasn’t any point in reading them. I went around and searched every drawer and wardrobe on the floor and was able to find nothing but a large air horn.

“Seriously? That’s the only thing you could find?” Twilight grunted.

“Well, did you do any better?” I retorted.

She snorted and walked past me, flicking my face with her tail as she did so.

“This was a complete waste of time…” She spat.

Twilight opened the exit and walked out onto the stairwell platform, when the rusty metal screeched and broke away from the wall; Twilight screamed with terror as she was about to fall to her death. I sprinted forward just as the entire platform gave way and grabbed Twilight’s hoof and pulled her towards me as hard as I could. The whole stairwell collapsed into the abyss as Twilight and I shot backwards and I fell onto my back, causing Twilight to land on my chest. We made eye contact for a good few seconds before her breathing returned to normal and she blinked.

“You… You saved me…” She mumbled.

I smiled warmly as I continued to stare into her eyes.

“Don’t get used to it; it’s a one-off sort of thing.” I teased.

She huffed in amusement and she smiled briefly, before I cleared my throat.

“Um, Twilight, you’re kinda lying on top of me.” I reminded her.

She jumped up and took a step back, allowing me to stand up.

“Thank you… For saving me...” She sighed, her eyes darting to the floor.

Could it be? Twilight actually appreciated something I did!? Outstanding…

I looked out of the open doorway and over the edge to see the broken stairwell at the bottom of the alley.

“Well, we’re definitely not getting down that way…” I hummed.

I then heard a loud roar in the distance, and jogged to the nearest window to see numerous zombies in the distance running towards the building. From the first floor I could hear Rainbow Dash shouting for us.

“Guys! We have a lot of zombies coming our way! What do we do!?” She yelled.

Next thing I know, I hear Rainbow Dash screaming at the top of her lungs and the tickers on the second floor screeching; she had come upstairs without realising they were there, and they were going to kill her.

“Rainbow Dash!” Twilight cried in horror.

I didn’t allow myself to think, I sprinted out of the doorway and leapt onto the wall from the opposite building, and wall-jumped into the second floor doorway. I flew into the next room to find Rainbow Dash on her side, using her hind legs to kick away the mutants that were savagely attempting to tear into her.

“Get the fuck off me you freaks!” She yelped.

“HEY!” I boomed, storming towards the creatures.

I withdrew Ingeo’s pistol and shot five of them, leaving two left; they lost attention of Rainbow Dash and began lashing out towards me, swinging their arms around violently. I pulled out Kroksbane and stabbed one of them in the forehead, thankfully going deep enough to kill it instantly, that’s when the second one grabbed me and tried to bury its pincers into my neck; I grabbed the underside of its jaws and held the creature back and struggled with it for a good ten seconds before I was able to throw the creature aside. It quickly recovered and turned to face me, before it could take a step forward and leapt forward and drop-kicked it square in the chest, sending it sprawling across the room. I ran to the previous zombie and yanked out Kroksbane. I turned to the mutant who was just getting up and ran towards it; before it had the chance to get its bearings I shoved the knife into its neck.

“Sleep tight motherfucker…” I growled as it dropped to the ground, twitching.

I pulled out the knife and went over to Rainbow Dash, who was staring at me in shock.

“Are you alright?” I asked her, kneeling down and putting a hand on her shoulder.

“Th-they hit me… But they didn’t c-cut me anywhere, I’m okay…” She stuttered.

“Good.” I sighed, standing up.

“That was… P-pretty badass…”

“That’s nothing, I saved Twilight less than five minutes ago, and she actually thanked me!” I replied.

She recoiled in shock.

“Yeah, tell me about it.” I chuckled.

Our lighthearted recovery was interrupted by the roars of more zombies, and the smashing of a window downstairs.

“How many?” I asked.

“I saw at least thirty before I came upstairs.” Dash replied.

I went over to a window and saw a horde of over two hundred zombies hurtling towards us.

“That’s a LOT more than thirty Rainbow Dash!” I shouted.

“What do we do!?” She asked full of worry.

I ran over to the door to the first floor and barred it shut just as the first zombie began to thump angrily at the door.

“We’re completely surrounded!” I heard Twilight scream from upstairs.

Twilight had a better view from the third floor, and would thankfully be safe now since the stairwell had collapsed. Me and Rainbow Dash on the other hand, were one locked door away from the horde.

Time felt like it slowed down for me as I realised this might be the end, the roars of the zombies began to die out as the sound of my own heartbeat thumped louder and louder. The door began to dent as zombies on the other side pummelled at it with all their might; I turned to look at Rainbow Dash, who was beginning to hyperventilate with short, shallow breaths and she, too, realised she was going to die.

It was at that moment, when I knew what I had to do…

“In that toilet stall, now!” I ordered Rainbow Dash.

She ran in and locked the door.

“What about you?” She called out.

“Just stay put and shut up!” I growled.

I ran over to the doorway that led to the third floor, and looked out to the alleyway; before climbing down the broken stairwell and jumping to the ground below.

“Where are you going!?” Twilight shouted down to me from the window above.

“I’ll lure them away! Get to the nuclear silo and find the orb shard!” I shouted back.

“There are too many Callum! They’ll kill you!” She yelled.

“JUST FIND THAT ORB SHARD AND GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!” I screamed.

I turned and ran out to the side of the building to see about fifty zombies inside the building already, the others still charging like a stampede.

“HEY!” I boomed loudly.

I pulled the air horn out of my pocket and held down on the top, causing the horn to sound off. Every single zombie turned to look at me, and they began roaring in anger and bloodlust.

“Look what I got! A brain! Barely used! COME AND GET IT!” I hollered and let off the air horn again.

They all began charging towards me, the zombies inside left the building and came after me; so I knew Rainbow Dash would now be safe.

“That’s it… Come on… Come to Papa…” I murmured.

I kept honking the air horn, making sure they were all running after me before I turned and ran for my life; I shot down the street and narrowly avoided a smaller batch of undead as I sprinted past the slower zombies and ran back from where they came. I only looked back once, to see the entire horde on my heels, I ran like I’d never run before and zoomed down the road, sounding off the air horn as I went.

I had been running non-stop for a good five minutes and I was out of stamina, the zombies however were not; I was running on fumes and they were gaining on me. I then noticed a ladder on the side of a building and had an idea; I ran into the building and headed upstairs, taking the air horn and smacking the top into the nearest wall, causing it to jam and sound off constantly. I threw it on the ground behind me and quickly smashed open the closest window; I then found the ladder and dived towards it, climbing onto the roof and hopping onto the next building.

I made my way across the rooftops, crossing five different buildings just to be sure I was safe, before peeking over the edge to see the horde of zombies swarming into the first building like a mass of crazed ants. Thankfully I had been able to slip away unnoticed; I had escaped…

“Well, now what…?” I mumbled to myself.

I noticed it was getting dark, and knew I wouldn’t find the silo at night; so I made my objective to find a safe location to sleep, in the distance I saw the outline of another tall building and figured there would be fewer zombies higher up. It didn’t look too far away, perhaps half a mile away? I took a deep breath and tightened the straps on my backpack, reloaded Ingeo’s pistol, and headed off to the building, hoping it would be safe…

By the time I reached the building, it was night time and everything was near pitch black; I could just see the double doors in front of me. I tried to open them, to find they were locked from the inside.

“It’s never simple, is it?” I asked aloud, “There always has to be some sort of complication…”

{Well, this isn't exactly a holiday.} My conscience pointed out.

"Hey, shut up." I muttered.

I walked around the building to find and open window, no bigger than a large shoe box; however with the right technique I could probably squeeze through. I took off my backpack and pushed it through the window before standing on a bin and pushing myself through. I wasn’t the best at landings, and landed on my side on a big metal table and grunted with pain. Putting my bag back on, looked around to find I was in a large kitchen, unfortunately there was no food besides rotten fruit; there was however, a box of matches and a gas stove, meaning I could possibly cook the tinned foods in my backpack.
After taking the matches, I left the kitchen and entered a large dining room; in the room were three enormous tables, suited with one enormous zombie waddling around aimlessly. It appeared someone had the munchies before the power plant blew up, this motherfucker was big. Looking at the bloated flesh, I was rather terrified that he would explode upon death, so I decided melee combat was out of the question. I pulled out Ingeo’s pistol and attached the silencer, before aiming carefully at the obese zombie, who still hadn’t noticed I was there.

“Yo, Tubby McFat-Fuck.” I called.

It turned around, groaned angrily and began waddling its way towards me; its belly wobbled like jelly as the zombie’s big black tongue lolled out of his fat mouth; I daresay he was fatter than my mother!
I pointed the gun directly at his head and pulled the trigger, there was a small hiss as the bullet whizzed from the barrel and hit the zombie in the eye. His head jolted back before he fell, face first into the ground.

“Well, at least they don’t explode.” I mumbled.

No zombies came along after that, so I assumed it was safe and went back into the kitchen. I pulled a tin of baked beans out of my back and switched on the stove, thankfully it still worked and I quickly lit a match and put the stove onto a medium flame. I then emptied the contents of the can into a saucepan and cooked it for a while; when it was ready, I left the kitchen with the saucepan in my hand and sat at the dining room table; I didn’t bother with a fork and ate the beans directly from my hands. After what I had recently been through, this tasted absolutely amazing, I moaned with ecstasy as I chewed up the beans and the flavour flooded my dry mouth. I normally didn’t even like beans, but this was just absolute heaven.

When I was done, I got up and headed into the next room to figure out where I actually was, and ended up coming into a large lobby; I knew exactly where I was, this was a hotel.

“Oh… Yeah…” I grinned, knowing there would be a comfy bed with my name on it.

I turned into a hallway and found some stairs, which took me up to a thin hall with doors on either side; I merrily skipped down the hall until I found an open door. I entered the room to find a large queen-sized bed, covers already made, and pillows plump.

“I, am a very happy chappy…” I muttered, smiling.

I shut the door behind me, took off my bag and undressed, before diving onto the bed and was almost catapulted out of it again.

“Ooh… Springy!” I giggled.

I got under the covers and nestled myself comfortably into the bed, before taking a long sigh.

It had been a long day; I’d left my brother, found temporal peace with Twilight, and had drop-kicked a zombie in the chest, overall, a pretty interesting day. I went on to wonder where Dash and Twilight were, and if they were alright; I was sure they were, Twilight was a smart mare, I was sure she would be able to find a safe place to stay overnight.

I took my phone out of my pocket and took a selfie for a laugh; I decided I might as well document my life’s adventure from now on, just so I could look back on the memories at a later date in time. I knew this adventure wouldn’t last forever, and the time would come when we find all six shards, and the ponies would go home, while I would work out what to do with the rest of my life; but that was a long way off yet…
I put my phone away and lay back on the fluffy white pillow, and just thought to myself about life, and how far I had come...

One moment, I was a depressed teenager with nothing good to enjoy.
Then I discover My Little Pony and become a part of one of the biggest and most unique fandoms in existence; and now, this…
An adventurer, a hero in the making, a stone-cold killer; I would never be the same again, I knew that from the moment I killed my clone.
Yet our journey wasn’t even half way over yet; who knew what the future held for me and the six?

These thoughts eventually faded away as I drifted away into a nice calm sleep, and the fears of zombies and the world around me disappeared, and was replaced by the calm sweet sound of silence as I sank deeper and deeper into my slumber.

Soon enough, I was completely out for the count…

Chapter Twenty-Eight: Nuclear Nightmares

Chapter Twenty Eight - Dancing With The Dead

I lay absolutely still, not moving a muscle, barely breathing; the ticker was only centimetres away from my face, my eyes darted from side to side to see more of them shambling around the room, lashing out in random directions and screeching to themselves. The ticker on my bed began to slowly extend its antenna towards me, I had no choice but to hold my breath and stay put as they made contact with me and flinched, before feeling all over my face.
There was the sound of a door closing and the creature jumped back, I looked across the room to see a tall man wearing a full suit of black metal armour, on his back was a large pair of snow-white wings. He pulled a futuristic looking rifle up from his waist and shot the tickers before they could reach him; the last one jumped at him and he effortlessly rifle butted it to the ground and stomped on his head until it caved in; I lay there, absolutely speechless, it was the sniper…

“Who are you…?” I muttered.

The suited man turned to face me, the armour was incredible, but I was more transfixed on his wings, they were huge! I couldn't see his face due to his helmet; all I could look into was a visor that glowed lavender purple.
That's when he spoke to me.

“Ignore the power plant, and go east.” He ordered.

The accent was English, but I couldn't quite distinguish exactly what he sounded like, due to a filter in his helmet that made him sound tinny and robotic.

“Why?” I asked.

“They need you.” He replied.

I stood up and walked over to him, confused.

“Twilight and Rainbow Dash?”

He nodded.

“How do you know?”

“I just do.” He growled.

“Who even are you?” I demanded.

He lifted his wrist and tapped a button on his suit, and his suit began to dismantle itself, a lot like Iron Man’s would. As his bare chest was revealed, I instantly recognised the large black skull tattoo; the man lifted his helmet off and I saw his face.

“Ingeo!?” I cried in disbelief.

Before I could move, he pulled out a knife and thrust it into my chest; I felt the excruciating pain flood through my body as my vision went fuzzy.

“Hey Callum, you miss me?” He growled.

I stumbled back, and fell backwards to the ground.

I shouted out in fear and panic as I sat up, and opened my eyes; I was still in the hotel bed, in the empty room. I felt sweat on my forehead and I was breathing a lot faster than normal; I looked down to see no knife wound, and no blood. I took a deep sigh and flopped back onto the pillow.

“Stupid dream…” I muttered.

I stretched and slowly got out of bed and rubbed my eyes, before standing up and grabbing my shirt and putting it on. I checked Wrinkleboom and found it still fully loaded, so I attached it to the bag and uncocked Ingeo’s pistol, I had seven magazines left so I didn’t want to waste any ammo. I’d stick with using the shotgun as my bag was stuffed full of shells; I had at least two hundred shots on backup. I took my phone out of my pocket to find it was on thirty percent battery, that would last me two days if I didn’t over-use it; thank god I didn’t get an iPhone, or I’d have run out of battery last month! Android all the way…

I left the room to find a zombie had made its way down from the top floor and was wandering aimlessly until it noticed me and started growling and began running towards me.

“Morning.” I growled with a smirk, pulling out Wrinkleboom.

I aimed for the head and pulled the trigger, and the zombie’s head exploded, coating the walls around it to gain a lovely coat of dark red and a few lumps of brain; absolutely glorious…
I heard a screech from behind me to find a ticker had made its way downstairs as well and was charging towards the sound of the shotgun blast.

“He-e-e-ere zombie, zombie ZOMBI-I-E-E!” I sang.

It screeched a second time and sprinted towards me, where I stood waiting with Wrinkleboom.
One emptied zombie skull cavity later, I went into the kitchen and made myself breakfast; baked beans with a side order of more baked beans. After eating and reloading Wrinkleboom, I went to the reception and unlocked the front door and left the building.

Now that I was outside I needed to stay quiet and draw as little attention as I could, I didn’t want to end up with another horde on my tail.
I went around the building and headed down the road to find a group of zombies running towards a ticker, who was unsuspectingly standing around, taking no notice of them. Before he knew what was coming, they swarmed around him and brought him to the ground and began eating him alive. It appeared different types of zombies preyed on one another.

“Oh that’s nasty…” I whispered.

Thanks to the gore-fest, I was able to sneak by with ease and head along the long road; when I reached the end I was at a T-junction, I could go either left or right. I initially wanted to turn left and head straight towards the nuclear silo, but my dream had stuck in my head all day, and some part pulled at me to head right.

{It’s just a dream, ignore it and turn left.} My conscience ordered.

{But what if I should turn right?} I thought back.

Eventually, I shrugged the thoughts aside and stuck with my mission and turned left; I was walking for a few minutes when I stopped abruptly; I don’t know why I stopped, I just, did. I looked around and felt like something was wrong, really wrong. I wasn’t one to believe in visions, but my heart told me that I needed to go back.

“Oh for fuck sake…” I muttered.

I turned around and headed back the way I came, and went down the right road…

I had been walking for a while when I heard a low growl; I was being watched.

“I don’t have time for this shit… Come on!” I growled angrily.

There was a loud screech, and before I knew what was happening I was on the floor; I was able to roll over as I fell and looked up to see another hooded zombie, his eyes were pure black along with his teeth; he lifted his arms and I saw large claws replacing his fingers, he was about to claw into my chest when I grabbed his wrists and was able to hold him back as he thrashed about on top of me. I pushed his arms back and was able to tuck my legs in and kicked him with both my feet, sending him a few metres back. He got back up and crouched low, growling, and then he leapt at me, roaring again; I’d never seen a creature jump so high and so fast in all my life, it jumped like a human sized cricket. I was able to dodge the zombie’s pounce only by mere centimetres and it shot past me and crashed into a bin.
While it got up and recovered, I whipped Wrinkleboom from my back and aimed; by then it was ready to pounce and leapt at me as I pulled the trigger; the force of the shotgun blast prevented it from coming forward, and so it flew a good ten metres into the air; it came back down and hit the ground with a loud smack.

“Well that’s the end of that…” I muttered.

I was about to reload the shotgun when I heard a hiss from behind me; I turned around to see the creepiest mutant so far, this creature barely resembled a human in the slightest. It had a second body, like a Siamese twin, except there were no legs, just a third set of arms. It walked on two sets, like an animal, and the remaining arms had elongated into large scorpion-like pincers.
There wasn’t a hair on the creature, leaving it to be a dark pink fleshy freak-bag; so mutated I couldn’t even tell if it were a male or female.

“And I thought the tickers were ugly…” I muttered.

The creature outstretched its arms and began to run towards me, snapping the pincers viciously at me. I still had another round in the shotgun and shot the beast in the head, completely decapitating it; the creature flopped onto the ground and stopped moving. I was going to reload Wrinkleboom when it started moving again, it stood back up and continued walking towards me, hissing loudly and spurting black blood from the headless neck.

“OH HELL NO!” I screamed and bolted.

The mutant sprinted after me, and instantly began to gain on me, it was evidently faster. I hopelessly sprinted at my absolute maximum down the long road, I could hear the thudding of the mutant’s hand-feet and I knew it was about to catch me. Suddenly there was a loud yelp and I glanced behind me to see the creature was gone, I skidded to a halt and looked across the road to see the mutant being torn to pieces by something much bigger; it was tall, very tall; it stood on two legs and had a long lizard-like tail, there were large horns upon its head and its mouth was elongated like a crocodile’s muzzle. None of these features compared to the foot-long claws it had on each of its fingers, currently tearing the headless mutant into several individual pieces.
I gulped and slowly walked backwards away from the creature, only to hear more hissing from behind me, I turned to see five more mutants approaching, they hissed and clicked their pincers at each other before they ran towards me, it seems they could communicate. I was surrounded and had no choice but to fight, I pulled out Ingeo's pistol and prepared myself; I was taken aback when they all ran around me and all attacked the larger mutant, it took me a few seconds to realise there was a food chain amongst this radioactive city, each different species seemed to gang up against each other, much like how the standard zombies took down the ticker earlier.

{Something tells me that humans are at the bottom of this food chain, so let’s move…} I thought to myself.

I ran down the road where the mutant pack had come from and turned right, thankfully the road was empty. I strolled down the lane at a brisk pace, not daring to look back.

After a few minutes of walking I was certain that I was safe and walked into a nearby clothes shop. I reloaded Wrinkleboom and then decided to explore the shop; there were some really nice clothes around, there were loads of big brand names on the items, I guessed this was Ukraine’s version of Primark or something...
While my backpack was full of shotgun shells, there was enough room for about four items of clothing, so I thought it wouldn’t hurt to browse for some new clothes, seeing as I was going to be travelling for a long time and my current outfit would eventually get over-worn. Nearly all the items in the shop were in perfect condition and seemed unaffected by the radioactive apocalypse; then again I didn’t think zombie’s really cared about their sense of style.
I decided to get two heavy duty clothes, and two fancy clothes; I picked out some camo trousers and a long-sleeved baseball tee-shirt; the shirt had padded shoulders and would be perfect for any outdoor need.
For my fancy, relaxed clothes choice, I went and took some dark red chinos and a beige shirt from Fat Face; I finished off my little shopping spree by taking some Ray Ban aviators. I packed everything into the bag except the aviators, which I decided to put on for some style; I looked in the mirror and grinned, the aviators made all the difference and I looked pretty damn sexy, (if I say so myself…)

“Now then, to business.” I said to myself.

I left the shop, took a breath of air, and started heading down the road, when I heard loud thudding footsteps coming from behind me. I ran to the closest car and squatted behind it; I looked through the car’s window and waited as the steps grew louder and louder. The nine foot tall creature came around the corner and sniffed the air; its muzzle and enormous claws were still dripping with the black blood from the other mutants.

{Shit.}

I took off my backpack as quietly as possible and crawled underneath the car, I looked across the road from my hiding place to see the big clawed feet approaching; it wouldn’t be long before the beast reached me. After witnessing the way it completely tore the other mutants apart, I knew I wouldn’t be able to outrun this creature, let alone fight it; I just lay completely still and hoped that it wouldn’t find me.
It reached the car and a large clawed foot hit the ground only a metre away from my head, I gulped as the creature’s shadow grew larger as it began to squat lower, growling deeply. I held my breath and kept my eyes wide open, the bloody muzzle came into sight as it began sniffing the air, searching for its prey… Me…
A few sniffs later, it stood up properly and walked off down the road, the same direction I needed to go in. I groaned, wondering how to get past the monster without getting caught.
That’s when I had the stupidest idea since my attempt to cook rice in my stomach by eating it raw and drinking boiling water; except this time my plan was going to work…

I crept back into the clothes store when the clawed monstrosity wasn’t looking, and picked up one of the clothed mannequins and brought it to the shop door. I then looked out the window and watched the creature turn the corner and head down into another road; that’s when I picked up the mannequin and took it out into the middle of the road. I propped up the mannequin on its stand and ran over to the car I hid under beforehand, I picked up my bag and put it on before taking a deep breath.

“COOIE! MISTER SEXY-CLAWS!” I sang as loud as I could.

I squatted down as low as I could, and half a second later there was a loud roar as the beast skidded around the corner and instantly pinpointed the mannequin; it dropped on all fours and bolted towards the mannequin, hissing loudly. As soon as it whizzed past the car, I left my hiding place and ran as fast as I could towards the next road and shot down the street like a bullet; I didn’t stop there and ran down the next two empty roads until I was sure I was far, FAR away from that thing.

The next road I turned into had four ordinary zombies walking around aimlessly; they all spotted me as I was jogging. I came to a halt and bent over with my hands on my knees.

“Give me a moment guys, I need a breather…” I panted, exhausted.

The zeds all began running towards me, yelling their undead gibberish; I didn’t have the time for Wrinkleboom, nor did I have the energy to take them on with melee combat. I pulled Ingeo’s pistol from its holster and shot them all to the ground and went back to catching my breath.

After that, I made my way across the road with pistol in hand; making sure I was armed in case I was ambushed. After venturing down another two roads and killing three more zombies, I reloaded the pistol and put it back into its holster, replacing it with Wrinkleboom to conserve ammunition.
I was rather confused as to why there were so few zombies in this area; and then by mere coincidence, the answer was revealed to me.
By a loud scream... The scream of a terrified girl...

“Twilight…” I breathed.

I clutched Wrinkleboom to my chest and burst into a sprint. Thankfully the scream’s origin wasn’t too far away and I was able to find it in mere seconds, only two roads away; I came across a large police station, there were two large double doors wide open as a zombie horde poured in. I looked up to the third floor to see a light blue face in the glass, looking down at the zombies below her.

“Dashie.” I gasped.

I stood there, frozen in panic; I didn’t know what to do. I had to figure something out, and fast; next to the police station was a large garage; perhaps there was a side door to escape from or something… Anything!?
I ran down the road towards the zombies, I veered off left and reached the garage; a few zeds had seen me and had gone after me. I pulled out my knife and turned to face them. As the first one ran at me I punched him square in the face, knocking him to the ground, I dodged the swipe of the second one and stuck the knife into his back, severing his spinal cord. I quickly pulled the knife out and stabbed the third in the eye; the zombie shrieked in pain and rage until I thrust the knife deeper and twisted it, rupturing her brain. The fourth zombie got to me as I pulled the knife out and was able to grab me, before it could bite me I stuck the knife up into the underside of his jaw, shutting his mouth and killing him instantly. Thankfully there were no more after that and I went back to looking for a way to help the girls.

“There’s got to be a way out!” I heard Rainbow Dash shout.

“The only way out is through this door! Which happen to have over a hundred zombies on the other side of it!
Just keep pushing back on the damn wardrobe or we’re both dead!” Twilight yelled back.

I looked around frantically, looking for something that could possibly help.
That’s when I noticed the chainsaw sitting in the corner of the room.

“Oh… Yeah…” I growled slowly, with a large grin.

I went over and picked up the chainsaw, the tank was full of fuel. Next to it was a pair of goggles and an apron, no doubt it was there for chopping wood, and the apron was for woodchip protection, but here and now it was for making zombie mush, and splatter protection.
I put on the apron and goggles, and picked up the chainsaw; thankfully I knew how to use one as my brother had taught me while he worked as a tree surgeon. I revved her up and lifted it as the engine started running, I pulled the trigger quickly to check the blade, it was in perfect condition.
A lone zombie had been attracted by the sound and walked into the garage, I ran towards him and brought the blade down onto his neck as I pulled the trigger, the zombie opened his mouth as his eyes began bulging out of their sockets, the chainsaw glided down into his chest as it sprayed blood all over the place, it was more effective than I had expected, I guess the blade was new. I pulled the saw up and released the trigger, allowing the zombie to flop to the ground.

{That was one zombie, now imagine a hundred…} My conscience murmured.

I didn’t need to imagine it for long, I left the garage and charged towards the zombies with my finger held down on the trigger. The saw cleaved through them like butter as I coated the walls of the police station with blood.

“What’s going on!?” I heard Twilight shout over the sound of the chainsaw.

“I don’t know!” Dash cried back.

I grinned as I called up to them.

“I’M MAKING SOME FREAK MEAT STEW! WHO WANTS SOME!?”

I rushed into the building and began to paint everything crimson….

The last zombie jumped back as I swung the saw at it, he then came to grab me; I pulled the saw upwards into his groin and the chainsaw roared as it cut through the pelvic bone and then through numerous organs, followed by the ribs, which was followed by the skull. I gave the saw a final yank upwards and the zombie split into two halves.
As the adrenaline died down, I began to realise how many zombies I had killed; I looked around to see the ground littered with bodies, there was blood everywhere, and this was just the upstairs. The rooms downstairs were at least two inches deep with blood. I looked at my hands to see they were plastered with the stuff; my skin wasn’t at all visible.

{Hm, should have worn gloves…} I thought to myself, slightly amused and slightly disgusted.

I dropped the chainsaw and began wiping the blood from my hands, I looked down at my feet to see my shins were absolutely soaked with blood, thankfully my work boots had kept the blood out, my socks were still nice and dry.

“Is it safe to go out?” I heard Rainbow Dash whisper on the other side of the door.

“I don’t know, and I don’t want to risk it.” Twilight replied.

“But I heard someone shouting, what if that was Callum?”

“Callum’s dead Rainbow Dash, nobody would be able to take on a horde like that.”

“Do you not care, at all?” Dash growled.

“I never said that; while I hate his kind, his sacrifice was very admirable.” She replied.

{Yay! Progress!} I thought merrily.

“Why do you hate him? I still don’t get it.” Dashie asked.

“Reasons you wouldn’t understand, I’ve seen things that you haven’t; I know what his kind will do if they discover us. Callum would have led them to us if he believed he had our trust and friendship, so one of us had to remain his enemy, no matter what.” She explained.

{Yay! More progress!}

It appeared Twilight had been given some misleading information about me and the human race; I needed to find the source of this information and prove Twilight wrong.

“How can you be so sure?” Rainbow quizzed curiously.

“I was shown the future.” Twilight answered bluntly.

{Clearly a wrong future.} I thought angrily.

If there’s one thing I hated more than anything, it was being accused of things I haven’t done, or in this case, things I won’t do; I had to find a way of making Twilight see me eye to eye.

“It matters not, he’s dead now; and we must continue without him.” Twilight muttered.

“Until I see his body, I believe he’s still alive.” Dash retorted.

I decided to play a prank on the ponies for shits and giggles, and began to growl like a zombie.

“Sshh, there’s still one out there…” Twilight whispered.

I roared and began hitting the door, clawing at it in attempt to break it down, causing Twilight to squeal in fear.

“Raahh! Brains!” I growled as I kept hitting the door.

I took a few steps back and charged at the door, breaking the hinges and moving it back a few inches, only to be stopped by a wardrobe barricade; Twilight and Dashie both screamed.

“Roar! I’m a scary zombie! I’m gonna eat your butts! But not Twilight’s because it smells!” I shouted.

Their screams went silent, and I stopped clawing at the door, after a moment of silence Dash came to the wardrobe.

“I swear to fucking Celestia… If that’s you out there…” She said as she began pushing the wardrobe out of the way.

I stood back and leaned against the wall next to me, just to look extra awesome. The door opened and Twilight and Rainbow’s faces appeared both in shock, looking at the amount of dead bodies littered around, and the red floor, walls, and even the ceiling.

“You’re alive…?” Twilight exhaled with awe.

“I’m afraid so.” I replied.

Rainbow Dash squealed and started to run towards me for a hug.

“Ah-ta-ta-ta, wait!” I ordered.

She stopped just before she reached me, she then realised that I was covered from head to toe with blood and understood why I'd stopped her. I took off my goggles and apron so she didn’t get a new coloured coat. I opened my arms and she leapt at me, I caught her and held her tightly as she started choking up.

“I thought you were dead! You could have been zombie bones!” She whimpered.

“Could'a been, but I'm not; it takes more than a giant zombie horde to stop Callum Horncastle!” I chuckled.

“You’re a tough one to kill, I’ll give you that.” Twilight said, huffing.

“And don’t you forget it! Can't get rid of me that easily.” I teased.

I let go of Dashie and she stepped back, absolutely beaming; her neck and hooves were now quite bloody, but it didn’t seem to bother her.

“Right, where to now?” Twilight asked.

“Hang on a second; I have a bone to pick with you.” I said, frowning at her.

“What have I done?” She asked innocently.

“I’ve saved your life five times now, and that doesn’t include the times I’ve prevented your life from needing saving. After overhearing your conversation with Rainbow Dash, I think you owe me an apology. You seem absolutely desperate to get rid of me, when I’m the only reason you’re still standing. I think you need to start putting a little more trust into me, and less trust in that stupid vision you call the future.” I spoke, calmly yet sternly.

Twilight was speechless for a moment, trying to find a point to argue, while Rainbow Dash smirked at Twilight smugly; eventually Twilight found words.

“I was shown the future by reliable sources, with magic; magic doesn’t lie.” She explained.

“Princess Celestia isn’t a reliable source Twilight. You’re extremely loyal to her, which is very respectable; your loyalty to her is outstanding, honestly, I admire you for it. But I’m telling you in the nicest way possible, Celestia has made a mistake. Showing you the future is pointless, because it hasn't happened yet, meaning you can change its outcome. It’s a scare tactic Twilight; Princess Celestia wants you to hate me, because she’s scared, and rightfully so, humans are scary creatures, I sure don’t like the majority of them, and I AM one!
Look, Twilight, I’m not calling Celestia a liar; I’m just telling you that she’s made an honest mistake. If we have any chance of finding the rest of the orb shards, you and I need to be on the same side, so can we just try to get along? Yeah?”

Twilight looked down at her hooves, unsure if she should listen to me, or stick with her mentor’s teachings.

“We don’t have time to discuss your decision here, let’s get a move on.” I ordered, beckoning both ponies to follow me.

We headed down the stairs and both ponies gasped at the mess I had made; the floor was stacked with mutilated bodies and was at least two inches deep with blood, we literally had to wade through my carnage to leave the building.

“By Celestia… You’re a killing machine…” Rainbow Dash breathed.

“Yeah… I kinda went ape-shit on them…” I replied, nervously chuckling.

“You’re probably the most dangerous creature amongst everything else in this city.” Twilight muttered.

“Oh no, trust me I’m not. I’ve seen something more dangerous than any living thing I’ve ever laid eyes upon.” I replied, shivering.

“Really? What is it?” Dash asked.

“Some big lizard thing, stands about eight feet tall, it’s got two big horns on its head, with claws as long as my forearm…” I told them.

I held out my arm so they could picture the size of the creature's claws. Dash and Twi looked at one another, then back to me.

“Yeah, this is the part where we leave.” Twilight ordered.

“You don’t have to tell me twice.” I laughed and walked alongside her.

We headed away from the station, now leaving a trail of bloody hoofprints and footprints as we walked, I decided to leave the chainsaw behind, as it was heavy and made too much noise, it would only bring more unwanted attention.

We’d been walking for a good half-hour without any more zombies or mutants in our path, when we finally reached the nuclear power plant. The great towering vent still stood, although I doubted it would billow out smoke any time soon. The plant was surrounded by a chain-link fence; the top of the fence was layered with barbed wire.

“Barbed wire… Why does every metal fence we find have barbed wire!?” Dashie growled.

“Because we keep entering important places that aim to keep trespassers out.” I told her.

“Dude, I didn’t actually want an explanation. It was rhetorical.” She said dully.

"Ooh, that's a big word for you." I teased.

She whipped me with her tail playfully as we continued walking to find the gate, which thankfully we found a short way down the road; the large padlock was rusted to hell, and would be easy to break. Behind us was a crumbled building with bricks scattered everywhere, I picked one up and hit the padlock a few times before it broke off. I removed the chain holding the double gate shut, and pushed it open.

“Ladies first…” I said to the girls with a bow.

“Guys just before.” Rainbow Dash retorted with a smirk.

I rolled my eyes and walked into the courtyard, making sure my shotgun was in hand. The area was completely empty, not a creature was to be seen, it was so quiet, you could hear a pin drop.

“I've got a bad feeling about this…” I muttered.

I tightened my grip on Wrinkleboom as I approached the double doors to the power plant; the others cautiously tiptoed behind me. I used my foot to slowly push the door open, and I walked in; there was a long hallway with rooms either side, and much like the outside there was nothing to be heard.

“Is it safe?” Twilight whispered.

“I don’t know…” I replied.

I looked in the rooms along the hallway to just to find loads of old broken computers and control panels, there were no bodies or blood, just a load of dusty old hardware.

“Well, are we safe?” Twilight asked.

“I think so, but keep an eye out for anything.” I answered.

At the end of the hallway was another double door that appeared to be locked, I gave it a push but it wouldn’t open. Above the door was a large panel with some text I couldn’t translate, but I assumed it led to the reactor core, where we’d most likely find the orb shard.

“We need to get through here.” I told Twilight.

“How? It’s locked.”

“Do you have any mana left?”

“I have enough to cast one more Radskin spell, which I’m saving for emergencies.” She replied.

“Well we need to get through this door, so can you use a laser spell, and we’ll just take everything carefully on the other side.” I suggested.

“Are you forgetting that we need to get all the way back across the town after getting the shard?” She reminded me.

“True…” I mumbled.

“Well, let’s go find the key.” She muttered back.

Twilight went left, and I went right, as we searched room by room. No key was to be found.
We were both at the entrance of the plant when we heard Rainbow Dash giggling loudly. We went back across the hallway towards her and stopped in front of her.

“You think this is funny do you?” Twilight growled.

“Yes!” She cried and began laughing to herself.

“What’s so funny, may I ask?” I quizzed.

She walked over to the double door and put a hoof on the handle and pulled, and with a rusty squeak, the door opened.

“Did you guys ever think to try the door?” She chuckled.

I looked at Twilight, and Twilight looked at me; both of us had the exact dumbfounded expression.

“I never thought I’d see the day that I was smarter than you eggheads.” She teased as she walked through the door.

Twilight and I both decided to avoid eye-contact as we entered the next room, which had a large stairwell which led underground; thankfully there were a few holes in that opened up the section to daylight, giving us some vision where to go.

“The shard’s down here, I can sense it.” Twilight said quietly.

I nodded and picked up the pace as we walked various hallways and descended more stairs, taking us deeper into the heart of Chernobyl; as we moved closer to the heart I could feel the temperature rising quite significantly.

“It’s getting pretty warm isn’t it?” Dashie pointed out.

“I think it’s because of Elephant’s Foot.” I replied.

“What’s that?” She asked.

“Basically a gigantic mass of molten radioactive waste that was created when this place had the meltdown.” I explained.

“Hm…” Dash hummed.

We all suddenly stopped as we heard a sound; there was a clang of metal in the distance.

“What was that…?” Twilight whimpered.

“Only one way to find out…” I sighed.

I held Wrinkleboom tightly and headed down the corridor, we then started to hear a deep humming sound. We could feel the vibrations through the floor, whatever it was, it was beneath us…

“I don’t like the sound of that…” Dash groaned.

“Nor do I…” I replied, shivering.

We kept walking until we found a large staircase that led to the lower floor; we headed down slowly and quietly. At the bottom of the stairs was a small compartment room, which had a door to the core reactor, where Elephant’s Foot would most likely be found, along with the orb shard. I took a deep breath, and opened the door, we walked into the massive room and I saw the core reactor in the distance. Before I could take another step, the floor began to vibrate, and the loud humming emitted from somewhere in the room.
That’s when I saw it; slowly rising up from a giant pit in the middle of the room, and it kept rising up and up and towered above the three of us; it was at least the size of a house. A small section of it was glowing brightly, and I soon recognised the orb shard, lodged in the indescribable mass.

“C-C-Callum…” Dashie stuttered.

She went silent for a few seconds, before finishing.

“WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?”

Chapter Twenty-Nine: The Bigger They Are…

Chapter Twenty Nine - The Bigger They Are...

“Get up the stairs, quickly!” I ordered.

The girls ran as fast as they could, I took one look at the gigantic creature before running after them; without warning, a giant fleshy tentacle shot past me and demolished the stairwell, leaving me with nowhere to run; I was trapped.

“Callum!” Dashie cried from the platform above.

I had no time to think, I looked up and saw another tentacle coming down to crush me; I dived out of the way just in time before the monster’s appendage slammed into the ground, cracking the concrete around it.
I had no other option to run towards the creature, I vaulted a broken pillar and dodged another tentacle by jumping up onto a broken platform. That was when I finally got a proper view at the beast; its body was just a gigantic mass of dark red flesh, giant tentacles emitted from random points all over it; the creature’s head was just a giant maw with about six layers of jagged teeth made from various human bones. None of these features were as horrifying as what I noticed next; all over the creature were small body parts, arms, hands and legs merged with the fleshy mass; mutated faces stuck out of the body and were all staring at me; all the workers at the factory appeared to have been absorbed into Elephant’s Foot, creating one gigantic radioactive super mutant…

{Well that explains where the bodies went…} I though with disgust.

The orb shard was lodged in the right side of the monster’s head, it could be possible to retrieve it with a bullet it I shot it in the right place; but to hit a moving target whilst being attacked by giant tentacles wasn’t exactly an easy task.

{Think Callum, think!}

I looked around frantically, before a tentacle shot under my platform and flipped it, sending me flying into the air; I screamed as I was launched backwards and hit the ground with a great thud, I cried in pain and rolled a few times before coming to a halt. I coughed and tried to get to my feet, when Twilight yelled down to me.

“Callum look out!”

I didn’t have time to look behind me and put my trust into Twilight as I dived to my right as the next tentacle shot towards me, missing me by mere inches. The colossal mutant roared, shaking the floor and causing debris to fall from the ceiling. At the moment I was just running and dodging, I was wearing myself out; I needed to start retaliating, I pulled out Wrinkleboom and prepared myself.

The next tentacle came from above and I dodged to the side as the fleshy tree trunk hit the ground, I shot the appendage at point blank range with both rounds and a large chunk of dark meat explodes out, thick purple blood splattered everywhere as the tentacle was lifted upwards and shook around in distress.

“Yeah! That hurt didn’t it!?” I growled.

The living Elephant’s Foot opened its wide maw and extended its teeth, out of its mouth came a huge long tongue with thousands human fingers all over it, wriggling aimlessly. The creature roared with rage as it retracted the tentacle I'd shot.

“Well fuck me! You’re almost as ugly as my mother!” I laughed and reloaded the shotgun.

A tentacle shot at me and I dived out of the way, commando rolling as I hit the ground so I could use my momentum to get back to my feet. A second tentacle smashed the ground next to me and I quickly blasted another gaping hole into it; the appendage recoiled in pain and thrashed around, spraying luminous purple blood everywhere. I made sure to dodge any blood coming my way, I may be radiation-proof for the moment, but I had no idea what chemical compounds it contained, it could be acidic for I knew.
More and more tentacles flew my way; I kept myself on the move and shot each one that attempted to hit me. With each tentacle I took down, another two went for me; this monster was clearly going to be a tough cookie.

“Callum! I don’t think shotgun rounds are going to kill this thing! You’re just pissing it off!” Twilight yelled.

“I think it’s already pissed off Twiley!” I hollered back.

“How do you know if you can even kill this thing!?”

“If it bleeds, it can die!” I growled angrily.

I clicked Wrinkleboom’s barrel back into place with two fresh shells in the chamber; I had to stop going for the tentacles and start taking out this thing’s body. I ran towards the beast and dodged the next tentacle that slammed into the ground ahead; the creature was evidently trying harder to kill me. As I approached the great pit, another thick tentacle smacked the ground in front of me; I jumped forward onto the fleshy arm and held my balance as it slithered backwards, allowing me to surf right up to the main body. I came face to face a human head, merged with the rest of the mass. He screamed with rage and his bulging bloodshot eyes rolled to look at me, they looked like they were going to explode due to their size, it was a wonder they were still in the skull’s eye sockets. I didn’t think twice before shooting the head, causing it to explode like a boil; bright green glowing radioactive puss oozed out of the hole left behind and the beast thrashed about, the tentacle I was standing on shook violently and I was thrown into the air, I fell right into the creature’s body and a few of the merged faces growled and tried to bite me as I slid down the fleshy mass, thankfully the soft flesh had broken my fall and I quickly jumped to the floor below, I turned around just as a tentacle smacked into me and sent me a few metres into the air, completely knocking the wind out of me, I twisted my body in mid-air to ensure I landed on my feet and skidded along the ground, sending dust and ash up from the crushed concrete.

I had a plan to shoot all the human heads off the body, as they appeared to still function and were perhaps the monster’s souce of vision, if I could blind it, I’d have a better chance of fighting it head-on.

“Where’s a grenade when you need one?” I panted.

I reloaded Wrinkleboom and dodged the next tentacle that came my way; I then ran back to the body and started taking out the heads around the base of the body, thankfully the tentacles would momentarily thrash in random directions with each head I took out, giving me time to reload the shotgun and find the next head to shoot.

“This would be so much easier if this thing were semi-automatic!” I grunted as another tentacle came crashing down, almost turning me into a red squishy paste.

I was able to blow up two heads with the same blast and the monster roared louder than ever, thrashing about savagely and throwing its tentacles in every direction, it extended its enormous tongue and the little fingers wriggled around even more so, as if they were all separate living creatures. I looked inside the gaping hole I’d created in the body and noticed something; a cluster of beating human hearts.

{This thing is using human organs to function!} I thought with horror.

While I was distracted by this horrifying detail, a thinner tentacle smacked Wrinkleboom out of my hands and wrapped itself around my right wrist. Before I could do anything, another larger tentacle smashed the ground next to me, breaking the shotgun into pieces, Wrinkleboom was no more.

“Fuck!” I growled.

I tried to break free of the appendage around my wrist and pulled back as hard as I could, to no avail it began to drag me closer to the body and started lifting me into the air. I yelled with pain as my arm was suddenly given the burden of my entire bodyweight; I pulled Ingeo’s pistol from its holster and shot the faces yelling at me from the creature’s body, hoping it’d cause the tentacle to drop me; while it thrashed me around, its grip only tightened.

“Ooh, I’ve seen enough hentai to know where this is going!” I yelped as it lifted me higher.

I held the pistol to the appendage and tried shooting that instead, I was splattered with hot purple blood and the tentacle finally released me; I fell through the air only to be caught by another, bigger tentacle. It wrapped itself around my body and squeezed me tightly, forcing me to drop the pistol and become completely defenceless; I howled in agony as I felt the pressure around my waist and chest become more and more intense, if it squeezed me any harder my organs would certainly rupture.

“Callum!” Rainbow Dash yelled at the top of her lungs.

She jumped down from the ledge and charged to the monster, desperate to aid me; I could do nothing but watch as multiple tentacles shot towards her, she was able to dodge most of them, but one of them was able to wrap around her hind leg and lift her into the air as well before flinging her across the chamber; as her wings were bound and featherless she could do nothing but flail around in mid-air before crashing into a pile of metal debris, concrete dust engulfed the area and she disappeared.

“RAINBOW DASH! NOOOOOO!!!” I screamed.

I thrashed about as hard as I could and kicked at the arm ensnaring me, its grip only tightened and it held me upside down and shook me violently, it flipped me back up and I went limp, stunned by the sudden shaking. The tentacle lifted me up towards the monster’s mouth, it opened its gigantic maw and extended its teeth again; the disgusting tongue rose up from the back of its throat and slowly approached me, twitching side to side like a snake; the little tentacles on the tongue danced around screeching, almost as though they were rooting for the rest of its hideous being to hurry up and kill me. That’s when the tip of the tongue peeled backwards like some type of foreskin, as the flesh unravelled. it revealed a second mouth, this wasn’t a tongue at all; it was in fact the creature’s real head!

“Let me go you colossal two-faced cunt!” I growled angrily as I once again attempted to struggle.

The second mouth was nothing but a giant set of jagged black pincers with rows of razor sharp spikes all along the inside, if they were to get a hold of me, I would be torn up into chunks in mere seconds.
The tentacle brought me closer and closer to the pincers, I was dangling just outside the first gigantic maw; I thought it was all over when I heard a gunshot. Before I knew what was happening, I was suddenly shaken around savagely before being thrown into the air; by sheer luck I smashed through the window of the upper floor and skidded across the floor, I hit a large control panel and came to an abrupt halt. I sat there dazed for a moment before Twilight poked my arm.

“Are you alright?” She asked, worried.

“Me no likey the biggy octopus monster…” I moaned dizzily.

She held out her hoof and helped me up, I bent over and recovered my breath and strength; that’s when Twilight gasped, I looked at her to find she was staring at my left arm; I lifted the arm up to see a big shard of glass sticking out of my wrist, thick blood all over it, along with numerous trails of blood trickling down to my hand and dripping from my fingertips onto the floor.

“Well, there goes my anti-radiation…” I growled.

I held onto the shard and yanked it out of my arm, I gasped with pain and more blood leaked from my wrist and began to coat my lower arm. The blood wasn’t flowing out of my arm too quickly, so I had thankfully not broken any of my arteries; I took Vladimir’s knife and quickly cut the sleeve off my shirt, I then wrapped it around the large gash and tied it as tightly as I could so no more blood would escape.

“It’s just a flesh wound, I’ll be okay.” I grunted.

Before Twilight could reply, there were more gunshots and we both ran to the window; right at the back of the reactor room, up on a ledge was the sniper from my dream, in the same black metal suit. In one hand was some type of sub-machine gun, spraying bullets into the Elephant Foot’s body, destroying the mutated heads one by one; in his other hand was a sword, it shone a bright cyan blue and sliced through the attacking tentacles like a hot knife through butter.

“Who is that guy?” Twilight muttered.

“I don’t know… But I want that sword...” I replied.

While we had no clue who this mysterious winged man was, he was clearly here to help…

“I need to find Rainbow Dash.” I said as I ran to the ledge.

“But your arm! The radiation will leak into your body!” Twilight warned me.

“Rainbow Dash could be dying under that debris, if not dead already! Is that a risk you want to take? Since when did you care about me?” I growled.

“Since… No! I don’t care about you, but I can't deny that I need your help!” She spat.

I turned my back to her and jumped down from the ledge; I quickly ran to the debris pile and pulled pipes and other scrap metal out of the way until I finally found a light blue leg. I pulled everything else away and dragged Dashie from the heap; bright red blood oozed out from a large cut on the side of her head, and her body was limp.

“No…” I choked.

I was distracted by a roar and turned around to see the monster lurching towards the sniper’s platform and smashing it to pieces; for a moment I thought he had been killed, only to see him jump forward from the dust cloud and slide down one of the tentacles, jumping effortlessly from one tentacle to the next to aid his descent. He landed on the creature’s head, very nearly being swallowed. As the beast thrashed its head and opened its mouth to extend its smaller second head, the sniper quickly dropped down underneath the rows of teeth and gripped onto the Titan’s Orb shard, before using his sword to cut it loose. He slid down the creature’s body and ran straight past me, he pulled a strange contraption out from his belt and threw it up to the control room where Twilight was hiding safely.

“What are you doing?” I called to him.

He turned to face me, before pointing to a large power switch on the other side of the reactor chamber; he then held his empty hand out and then pointed to himself, indicating for me to wait for his signal. A tentacle came towards him and he quickly used his sword to slice it in half, he grabbed hold of the mutilated appendage and was flung up into the air; that’s when my question was answered, my dream was true; he really did have wings. A pair of gigantic white feathered wings extended outwards from his back and he flapped them a few times to help him reach the top of the chamber, where he placed the orb shard in the centre of the broken reactor. Keeping his wings open, he glided down to another control panel and removed a device identical to the one he threw up to Twilight. He opened a box on the front of the panel and slammed the device into a large hole that fitted the device perfectly.

“Twilight! Put that device inside the control panel!” I yelled.

I had no idea what this guy was planning, but he certainly seemed to know what he was doing.

“Where!?” Twilight screeched with frustration.

“In a hole on the panel; there’s a box you have to open!”

“I can’t see it!”

“Would you like me to ask this monster to stop trying to kill us, so I can come up there and help you?” I sarcastically shouted up to her.

A tentacle shot towards me and I had to dive out of the way, it caught my leg and yanked me onto the ground, I quickly slashed it with Kroksbane and it let go.

“Describe what it looks like! I don’t see anywhere I can put this device!” Twilight yelled.

“Just use your fucking eyes, you retarded horse!” I boomed.

Another tentacle slithered around my waist and I stabbed it with the knife, it let go and yanked upwards; as the knife was still stuck into it, I was pulled up with it before the whole appendage split into two halves.

“I found it, it’s in there!” Twilight yelled.

I looked to the sniper to see him under attack by multiple tentacles, one caught him off guard and smacked him out of the air and he crashed into a pillar nearby; I ran to him and helped up him up to his feet.

“Are you alright?” I asked.

He nodded and pointed to the power switch, before sprinting back towards the monster and continued to dismember the numerous appendages. I ran over to the power switch and pulled it down, there was a deep boom from the reactor core and I saw the lights around the room light up, the building had power...

The sniper pulled out some sort of grenade and pulled the pin, before throwing it into the reactor; he flew down to me and grabbed me by the waist, lifting me into the air and flying me back to the upper room with Twilight.
He dropped me and then jumped back down to fetch Rainbow Dash and carry her up to us. As he put her down, he removed two large syringes and injected one of them into Rainbow Dash, he handed the other to me and gestured for me to inject myself; I quickly stuck the needle into my left arm and squirted whatever substance it contained into my body. With that, the sniper saluted to me and ran up the stairs and presumably left the building.

Twilight and I turned back to the window and watched as the tentacles grew closer and closer to us. Suddenly the reactor core began to emit a bright blue light, sparks and bolts of electricity shot out from it before a high pitched screaming sound emitted from it, the sound got higher and higher pitched until the reactor burst into bright blue flames; the orb shard within the reactor concentrated the energy into a laser beam that shot directly into the monster below it. The beast roared and screeched as the laser burned right through its head and into its body; the tentacles whipped around savagely, smacking aimlessly into everything around them. The laser continued burning into it until the light eventually faded and all the power ran out; the laser vanished and the creature crashed into the ground, twitching slightly before ceasing to move at all; dark smoke puffed out from the massive hole in its head and bright green glowing puss oozed out from it; the beast had been vanquished...

“We did it... We actually killed it...” Twilight breathed.

“I told you it could die...” I panted with a weak smile.

Twilight huffed with amusement, before she began to giggle; I too began to chuckle. The both of us then burst into laughter and hugged each other with delight, we laughed and laughed. When the laughter died down, we quickly stood apart and cleared our throats, not looking at one another; refusing to acknowledge the fact we'd just got along together.

“So, do you think Dashie will be okay?” I asked her.

“I don’t know, but she’s breathing okay.” She replied.

I squatted down and put two fingers to her neck, her pulse was going at a normal rate; she appeared to just be unconscious.

“She’ll be okay, but she’s going to have one hell of a headache when she wakes up...” I told her.

She sighed with relief and went over to the window, pointing to the reactor core.

“You need to go and retrieve the orb shard.”

I nodded and climbed down the ledge, approaching the dead and defeated Elephant’s Foot.

{Hm, more like Elephant’s Tusk...} My conscience muttered.

I prodded one of the fleshy tentacles but there was no response; the creature was indeed, dead. I walked over to the body and began to climb over the spongy mass, careful not to accidentally stick my fingers into the mutated faces attached to the creature, they did however provide useful footholds to work my way up to the top of the mass.

When I reached the top, the reactor was about half a metre out of reach, I jumped for it and just missed it; as I landed on the giant corpse the squishy body sunk in before pushing back up like a trampoline, giving me an extra boost in my second jump. I grabbed onto a metal bar and pulled myself into the reactor, much to my surprise none of the metal was hot from the laser blast, I placed a hand on the edge of the reactor core to find it was ice cold.

“That’s freaky…” I muttered.

I clambered up into the edge of the reactor and spotted the orb shard, it glimmered in the light and looked just as beautiful as the first. I reached in and grabbed the second part of the relic; the instant my skin made contact with the shard there was a white flash and I briefly saw a bright blue creature, it had two pony eyes and third human eye in between.

Half a second later, the image was gone and I slipped and fell out of the reactor, I landed on my side and sunk a few inches into the jelly-like flesh of the monster, I bounced back up before rolling down the body, eventually making contact with the hard ground; I stood up and looked at the orb shard in my hand.

“What the hell was that?” I blurted out to myself.

I brushed myself off and headed back towards the ledge.

“Twilight, head’s up!” I warned as I threw the shard up to her.

I wall-jumped to the ledge and pulled myself up, a pain shot through my wrist and I looked to see the torn shirt sleeve hadn’t made a very good bandage as it had already bled through; I unsheathed Kroksbane and cut off my other sleeve, I removed the other bandage and tied the new one on much tighter and more efficiently. I walked over to Twilight as she put the shard into her saddlebag; she tightened her straps and turned to face me.

“Well retrieved.” She said blankly.

“Couldn’t have done it without you.” I replied with a smile.

“I’m well aware of that.” She snorted.

{Damn it, back to her usual self...} I thought with annoyance.

I looked at the small puncture in my arm and thought about the syringe the sniper had given me and Rainbow Dash, I was curious about its contents; I went over to the syringe and read the label on the side.

“Huh, anti-radiation shot, provides twenty four hours of radiation resistance.” I read aloud.

“I didn’t think it were possible to create a serum like that without magic.” Twilight said.

“Nor did I; something tells me that guy had access to magic, he certainly wasn’t human.” I replied.

“He wasn’t?”

“Not sure if you’d noticed Twilight, but humans don’t have wings.” I pointed out.

“Then what was he?” She asked.

“I have no idea, I’ve never seen anything like it before. Then again, nor have I ever seen zombies, or a giant radiation tentacle rape monster.” I muttered.

She hummed in thought, before crouching over Rainbow Dash.

“What do we do now? Wait for her to wake up?”

I shook my head.

“We have a few hours before it gets dark, we need to find a safe place to stay the night.” I replied.

“Fair enough.” She replied.

I carefully picked up Rainbow Dash and put her on the back of my neck, holding her legs to make sure she didn’t fall off my back. I began to walk to the doorway when Twilight stopped me.

“What about your guns?” She asked.

“Wrinkleboom was smashed to pieces, and the pistol’s been buried under piles of debris, we’re going to need to stick to my knife if things get rough.” I answered.

Twilight’s horn lit up and Kroksbane levitated out of its sheath and floated in front of me.

“Some of my mana has regenerated, so I can use your knife if need be.” She said with a disgruntled look.

“Appreciated.” I replied with a nod, grabbing the knife from the air and sheathing it again.

I carried Rainbow Dash up the stairs and out of the building, we left the courtyard and headed back the way we came; the road seemed a little too clear for my liking, that's when I noticed the bodies littered all across the sides of the road, there wasn’t a single drop of blood, but instead the smell of burning meat.

“What happened here?” Twilight asked.

“Beats me…” I hummed.

We kept moving until we heard the sound of a zombie screaming in pain before dying out, we looked around the corner of the road to see the sniper running from zombie to zombie, attacking them with his bare hands; however each blow he gave the zombies sent them flying back and expelling a shower of sparks; suggesting his suit had some form of electrical weaponry.

"He's clearing the way for us." Twilight pointed out.

“How polite.” I said merrily.

Without warning a zombie came down from the building above us and slammed into the ground, large claw marks gashed through its chest; that’s when we looked up and saw it…

“Hey, it’s Sir Kill’a’lot!” I beamed.

The creature lifted its head into the sky and roared, the sound was deafening; the zombies attacking the sniper stopped and looked up at the beast before running away in terror; this creature was so scary that even the radioactive undead had come to fear it!

“What do we do?” Twilight whimpered.

I looked at the sniper, who looked at me and nodded. He drew his shining sword and ran to our aid just as the monster jumped down from the building and bared its large teeth. Our guardian angel removed a grenade from his belt and tossed it over to me, and then gestured for us to leave the area immediately.
Twilight levitated the grenade and put it in the side pocket of my rucksack for me, I nodded at the sniper one last time before we ran down the road as fast as we could. I looked back to see the mysterious stranger dodging the creature’s claws and counter-slashing with his sword, I didn’t know if he would win the fight or not, all I knew is that he’d bought us enough time to get the hell out of there.

We’d been moving for a good thirty minutes before I recognised the road ahead, we were getting close to the hotel I previously stayed in; this was good timing as the sky was getting darker and darker, and I didn’t want to wait around to find out what kind of creatures lurked in the night.

“There’s a safe place to sleep not far up ahead.” I told Twilight.

“Where you took refuge last night I assume?” She asked.

I nodded and we continued down the road. Eventually the hotel came into view above the rooftops of the next street, but the night had already arrived; and in the distance we began to hear roars and screeches.

“We need to get to the hotel, now.” I hissed.

“Why are you telling me that? Pick up the pace already!” She growled back.

We hurried along down the road and arrived at the corner, the hotel was only a few houses away; but we didn’t dare move as we heard the loud screech ahead; that’s when a large manhole further down the road opened up and a creature climbed out. We could only make out the silhouette and it appeared to have a human figure, however it was much taller and broader, and its eyes glowed a deep orange.

“What do we do?” Twilight whispered.

“Take Rainbow Dash and get to the hotel, I’ll distract it.” I ordered.

While Twilight didn’t want to carry Dashie, she didn’t want to act as bait for this new type of infected either, so with great effort she was able to carry Rainbow Dash on her back.

“Hide behind this car, and head to the hotel as soon as I pass you.” I told her.

She nodded, and I slowly approached the zombie.

“Excuse me, Mr Zombie?” I politely asked.

The creature turned around and saw me, and I got a good look at it; it was about seven feet tall and had broad bloody shoulders, its ribcage had emerged from its body which created a large row of bone pincers; this feature was nothing compared to the large jaw that unhinged like a snakes, forming a large set of mandibles; each tooth was pointed and designed to tear flesh.

“Hang on, is that you Maria? My ex-girlfriend, right?” I gasped.

The large mutant slowly walked towards me, growling and dribbling green goo.

“Honey, how’ve you been? Have you lost weight? You’re looking much more attractive than when we broke up, how are your boyfriends? All twenty seven of them?” I teased with a large grin.

The zombie stood on its tip-toes before roaring at me.

“Alright, twenty eight! Sheesh! I always forget about Barend...” I deadpanned, rolling my eyes.

The creature’s teeth began to extend out of the mandibles until they were all about the length of a finger, and the orange eyes turned red.

“Gotta go! Lovely to see you again though!” I shrieked and sprinted back the way I had come.

The zombie gave chase and was clearly a good runner, as it was already gaining on me. I darted to the side of the road and vaulted a few cars to gain some space between us. I whizzed past the car Twilight was hiding behind and kept running, the zombie screeched at me as it got closer and closer.

“Run Twilight! RUN!” I screamed.

I ran and ran until I saw a ladder coming out of a building up ahead; I sprinted towards a car ahead and jumped up onto the car and then up to the ladder. I climbed to the top and looked back over the edge of the building to see the zombie had taken the same route and was already halfway up the ladder.

{Oh great! Parkour zombies!} I thought sarcastically.

I jumped across the rooftops back in the direction of the hotel, there was a small walkway that led over the street and allowed me to reach the hotel with ease, I ran across the walkway and curb-stomped the supports afterwards, preventing the zombie from following me. I looked back to see not one, but SEVEN of these parkour zombies on the other side of the street; all roaring and screeching at me.

“Ha! Take that suckers!” I laughed.

Just when I thought I was safe, one of the zombies hissed at the other, and in response it went back to the ladder and tore it off its hinges, before carrying it back to the group; they were going to use it as their own walkway.

“Huh, intelligent…” I muttered.

I pulled the sniper’s grenade from my rucksack, pulled the pin and threw it across to the other side before they could put down the ladder. The grenade beeped loudly before emitting a bright blue wave of energy, when the light faded the zombies were all suspended in mid-air, completely unaffected by gravity, almost as if they were frozen in time. A few seconds later they all dropped down like rag dolls, dead.

{That’s fucking weird…} My conscience hummed to himself.

I turned around and traversed the rooftops until I reached the hotel, Twilight was waiting inside with Rainbow Dash by her side, who had finally come around and was rather dazed.

“Dashie!” I sang.

She got up and ran towards me and we embraced in a nice, tender loving hug.

“Thank Celestia you’re safe! Twilight told me everything while I was out!” She told me.

“Oh really, what did she tell you?” I quizzed, curious to what Twilight had said.

“She said you killed the giant monster with the same sniper from earlier, and then you carried me here before luring away some really freaky zombie!” She answered.

“Well, at the end of the day nothing’s scarier or more dangerous than the purple unicorn in this room, so luring the zombie away was just a piece of cake.” I chuckled.

Twilight glared at me and growled.

“See? Scary…” I squeaked.

Rainbow and I burst into laughter, and eventually Twilight finally cracked a smile.

“So, we’re staying here for the night?” Dash asked.

I nodded, and I led them up to the second floor where I slept the first time. We entered the room and took off our bags before getting into bed together; Twilight and I on either side with Rainbow Dash in the middle.

“Goodnight gals.” I smiled as I rolled over and closed my eyes.

“Night dude.” Dashie replied.

Twilight stayed silent, clearly not liking the idea of sharing a bed with me. I ignored the negative vibe and focused on getting to sleep. That’s when a hoof coiled around my belly, and before I knew it I was being spooned by Rainbow Dash.
I was going to tell her to get off, but I was too tired, and if anything I enjoyed the contact and reassurance that I wasn’t alone.

After a good few minutes of feeling Rainbow’s breath on the back of my neck, I eventually faded away into sleep…

Chapter Thirty: Lore and Order

Chapter Thirty - The Dance of Death

I felt a light prodding against my arm as I slowly woke up; I didn’t open my eyes as I tried to hold on tightly to my dream, which featured me merrily skipping through a large field of miniature Morgan Freemans, each of them saying 'hello' in his beautiful voice as I passed them.

“Dude… Dude..? C’mon wake up.” Rainbow’s voice was heard in my half-sleep.

“We don’t have time for this.” A more harsh tone was heard.

The next thing I know, there’s a loud metal clang beside my head and I jolted up in fear and shock; I looked to my right to see a metal bucket floating in a purple aura, with a stone floating beside it.

“You’re a dick Twilight.” I grunted.

“Yeah, what was that for? I was trying to wake him up nicely!” Dash moaned.

“We need to move, those anti-radiation shots won’t last forever.” Twilight grumbled back.

I rolled my eyes and stretched, before rolling out of bed and standing up, as the bed covers slid off my body I tensed all my muscles to properly stretch them out, I looked down and realised how much weight I’d lost, there was barely an ounce of fat on me now; my pecs were properly squared and I could see a very slight six-pack coming along. I actually felt comfortable in my own skin for once, I genuinely felt sexy, and apparently someone else in the room agreed with me.

“My eyes are up here Rainbow Dash.” I teased.

The blue mare jumped back and fell back onto the bed, blushing; I chuckled and put my shirt back on.

“How’s your arm?” Twilight asked, curious.

I unwrapped the makeshift bandage to find the wound had closed up relatively well, but the edges were starting to turn green and would become infected soon.

“I’ll be fine, but I could do with some antiseptic.” I replied.

“Rarity has some in her saddlebag, the sooner we return the better.” She told me.

I nodded and buttoned up my shirt, before putting on my jeans and picking up my rucksack. I opened the bag and emptied all the shotgun cartridges into a pile on the floor.

“What are you doing?” Dashie asked.

“Elephant's Foot destroyed Wrinkleboom, I don’t need them anymore.” I explained, shaking the bag.

Rainbow Dash hummed with understanding, I slung the rucksack onto my back and tightened the straps. After clipping Kroksbane’s sheath to my belt, I was good to go.
I opened the bedroom door and made my way down the hall with Twilight and Rainbow Dash behind me, I descended the stairs and went into the lobby; thankfully there were no zombies around at all now.

“Shame, if it weren’t for the radioactivity, this place would make a really nice safe-zone for people.” I muttered.

“Well, the place is full of radioactivity, so let’s move already.” Twilight bitterly ordered.

I rolled my eyes and looked at Rainbow Dash, who shook her head with a slightly amused smile; we all headed out the main door and looked around, the street was empty for now.

“Alright, let’s boogie.” I ordered.

We headed off towards the other side of town, when we heard growling and shouting ahead.

“Zombies.” I muttered.

I assumed it was the same horde I outran before, the air horn probably attracted hundreds more zombies before it finally ran out of compressed air, we would have to find another route, or take to the rooftops.

“Remember that horde that separated us the other day? Well guess who’s down the road.” I said cheerily.

“Great… What do we do?” Dashie asked.

“We either take a detour, or go above them on the buildings.” I answered.

I looked to Twilight, nodding my head to gesture that it was her decision to make.

“How would we get up?” She asked, choosing the rooftops.

“I suppose you could cling onto me, and I’d climb up with you on my back.” I suggested.

“Would you be strong enough to carry us vertically?” She quizzed with a concerned eyebrow upraised.

“One at a time, yes, so I’ll have to make two trips.” I assured her.

She nodded to confirm she’d allow it, I took off my rucksack and gave it to Rainbow Dash, who was able to put it on. After that I went to a large black drainpipe on the corner of the first building on the street; I went down to one knee and let Twilight climb onto my back, she wrapped her hind legs around my waist, and her forelegs over my shoulders. I stood up and slowly began to climb, it was more difficult than expected and it took a lot of my strength to scale the building. As we got higher and higher, Twilight's forelegs clamped around my neck and she squeezed tightly, and it became difficult to breathe properly.

“Would you loosen the grip please? You're kinda choking me.” I spluttered.

She replied with a nervous grunt and continued to latch on tightly, thankfully I was able to reach the top and clambered over the edge; Twilight let go and I bent over to recover, my biceps were burning from the stress they’d carried. I went to the edge of the building and looked down to Rainbow Dash who was impatiently waiting.

“You coming dude!?” She called.

“Yup!” I called back.

She took off my rucksack and put it back on the ground, before shouting to Twilight.

“Carry this up for me would you?” She asked.

Twilight’s horn lit up and the bag levitated up to us; I clambered down the drainpipe and was about to reach the bottom when it broke.

“Fuck!” I shouted as I fell to the ground.

The fall wasn’t too bad, but the drainpipe fell pretty hard onto me and hit the ground, creating a loud metal CLANG!
It took seconds before the zombie horde were sprinting towards us, shouting gibberish and shrieking wildly.

“They’re coming! Run!” Twilight shouted.

Rainbow Dash and I bolted back towards the hotel, we ran as fast as I could. That's when I heard Twilight screaming just as loud as the zombies.

“THEY'RE CLIMBING UP THE BUILDING!”

She was trapped up on the rooftop, I turned to Rainbow Dash and looked at her with panic.

“Go back for her, I know the way back!” She ordered.

I gave her a frown, uncertain.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m faster than them, Twilight’s not; I’ll lose them, don't worry. Just get to Twilight!” She commanded.

I nodded and Rainbow Dash and I split ways, she sprinted off while I turned down an alleyway and made my way around back to the building Twilight was trapped on. I spotted a nearby drainpipe and climbed to the top as fast as I could to see a zombie latched onto Twilight, she was keeping it at bay with her hooves, but she was mere centimetres away from having her throat torn open by the zombie’s gnashing teeth. I sprinted towards the undead freak and jumped into the air, drop-kicking the bastard in the ribs, sending him flying off the roof and splattering onto the pavement below. I stood up and helped Twilight to her hooves.

“You can thank me later, we need to move!” I ordered.

After saving her life twice, Twilight was in no mood to argue and followed me across the rooftop. A few zombies had been able to climb up and gave chase, but we were able to find a decent place to cross and made it to the next building. The common undead had a serious lack of spacial awareness and ended up falling to their deaths when trying to cross the gap. Twilight and I traversed from building to building and eventually we were a safe distance from the zombies, we came to a halt and both fell to our knees, panting furiously as we recovered from the run.

“I think it’s safe to say… Our cardio will be a lot better after this quest…” I panted.

She looked up at me, and began to laugh; we laughed together before she stood up.

“Where’s Rainbow Dash?” She asked.

I looked into the distance from where we’d come, and hope she was alright. While Rainbow Dash was an outstanding athlete, and by far the bravest out of the six, I still worried about her; who knew what else this radioactive city contained, and what if she bumped into the giant clawed lizard? I don’t think even she would be able to outrun that…

“She distracted the horde so I could come to aid you; she’ll be alright, she knows the way back.” I told Twilight.

“I certainly hope so…” She replied, nervously gulping.

We made our way across as many more buildings as we could before we reached the edge of the block; on the other side was a small park. Thankfully there was a nearby ladder and we climbed down to the bottom, there were no zombies around and we made our way to the park. It wasn’t much to look at, but the swing set and seesaw were still working.

“I don’t want to go any further without Rainbow Dash.” Twilight insisted.

“No argument here.” I replied, and sat on a swing.

After a few moments, boredom kicked in and I decided to start swinging.

“Really?” Twilight asked blankly, with a disapproving eyebrow upraised.

“Don’t judge me, I’m a child at heart.” I spat playfully, sticking my tongue out.

“Dear sweet Celestia…” She muttered and rolled her eyes.

I kept swinging and then launched myself into the air, leaving the seat of the swing and propelling forward and almost landing on Twilight’s head, my feet touching the ground no less than a metre away from her.

“Watch it!” She snapped, growling.

“Chillax Twiley, I'm just having some fun.” I replied.

“Don’t call me Twiley.” She huffed, wrinkling her nose.

“Oh come on, if I keep calling you Twiley, one day I might get lucky and be called Shiny!” I squealed and clapped my hands together with delight.

“I’d sooner hang myself than compare you to my brother.” She said coldly.

I slid up next to her and grinned.

“I understand, you see me like a lover instead, right?” I teased.

Twilight jumped back at least five feet and glared at me.

“Please, never make me picture that again, I’d rather not throw up the little food I’ve eaten.” She gagged.

“You just admitted that you’ve pictured it.”

Twilight’s horn lit up and my legs were pulled from underneath me, causing me to fall onto my back, Twilight approached me and glared at me.

“If I hear one more remark about something so disgusting, I will sow your mouth shut and use you as our speechless guide for the rest of this journey. You seem to think I’ve warmed up to you, well I haven’t, so stop trying to play things cool, we’re not friends, is that clear human!?” She barked at me angrily.

During her snap, a small speck of spit flew from her mouth and hit my cheek; I wiped it away and rolled my eyes at her.

“It was just playful banter Twilight, I don’t want to be your enemy.” I replied calmly.

“Well if you continue to flirt with me, like the disgusting pervert you are, you will make an enemy out of me; understood?” She grunted, walking off to the other side of the park.

{Shoot…} I thought to myself angrily.

{And it was going so well...} My conscience sighed.

I could definitely sense a new type of tension between us. Not sexual tension, but more like friendship tension. She was trying not to be my friend, but was finding very little reason to resist it; which proved my theory. The unicorn didn’t hate me, nor was she afraid of me anymore. It was something far more meaningful to her; in fact, it was actually quite adorable in a funny sense…
Twilight was afraid that Celestia had got it wrong…
Her undying loyalty to the Princess was keeping her from accepting my friendship, and I assumed she had been ordered to make my life hell; Celestia probably wanted to reduce the risk of me coming home with them on the way back to Equestria, so she'd ordered Twilight to sustain a constant atmosphere to prevent me from bonding with everypony. That was the most likely story, but still, that was just a theory…

“Rainbow Dash has been gone for twenty minutes now, I’m getting worried.” Twilight muttered.

“She’ll be fine, this is Dashie we’re talking about.” I replied.

“What are you, psychic? She could be in real danger!” Twi snapped back.

I rolled my eyes, I knew for certain that Rainbow Dash could handle her own. I stretched and sat on the seesaw, tapping at the wood in boredom. Twilight levitated both the retrieved orb shards out of her back and tried to piece them together, while they didn’t stay in place there was a certain distinction where the pieces fitted together.

“So, how does the orb even protect your world anyway?” I asked, curious.

Twilight looked up at me, before putting the orb shards back into her saddlebag.

“When it was in one piece, it produced a chembio-originatic repulsinator around the planet.” She replied.

“A chembio-origiwhat in the dick biscuit?” I exclaimed, “Explain in a language a dumb creature like myself can understand please.”

Twilight rolled her eyes and huffed.

“It produced a force field that repelled anything that didn't contain an original chemical or biological structure. In the most basic of terms, anything that isn't from our planet, can't get inside.”

“Oohh…” I said.

“Now that it’s been destroyed, dark forces from other worlds and universes could invade; and could destroy us all.” She winced.

“Has anything ever tried to before?” I asked.

“Yes, the son of the Holy Titan, Appleox the Corrupt.” She replied.

“Who was that then?”

I was starting to get really interested now, ever since I became a brony I was interested in Equestria’s history.

“His name… Was Nah’Lek...
It’s a name written in an ancient language very few ponies can translate, even my translating skills are inadequate for the language. But his name roughly translates to, The Defiler.
A long time ago, when Appleox became corrupted and was banished from our universe, his son Nah’Lek tried to destroy Equus. He was stopped by a company of heroes and was locked away in Tartarus for all eternity. Our lands were safe and the entire world flourished in harmony, and eventually Nah’Lek was long forgotten about, especially as Equus developed new problems to worry about; far east from Equestria the super-continent, known as the Griffon Kingdoms; many different allegiances of griffons formed and they began endless civil wars, and occasionally invaded Equestria in attempt to claim a new country for their own.
Then minotaurs began invading from the south, attacking ponies and griffons alike. After many years of war and bloodshed, a truce was formed and a declaration from most of the world’s leaders was signed; trade routes began to form, and the races began to make friendships. And very soon, we thought there was nothing serious to worry about.
But arrogance can lead many a fool, it seemed that even a god’s prison, may be breached…”

I sat there in awe, gobsmacked by this amazing insight to Equus… I was desperate to hear more…

“What happened then!?” I pleaded.

Twilight paused, and looked at the ground; she looked back up to me as she continued and I could see the anger in her eyes.

“One day, whilst I was panicking about a catastrophe that didn’t even exist, Tartarus’s gate holder, Cerberus, left his post and turned up in Ponyville. Without Cerberus, someone entered Tartarus, and was able to release Nah’Lek from his imprisonment. He had been planning his revenge for aeons, and knew what he was going to do. Finding an entrance to the caves where the Titan’s Orb was being held; he showed no mercy as he butchered the guards, and that’s when he cast a spell to send the orb here, to your world; upon entry it shattered into six shards and, well, you know the rest…” She explained.

After a brief silence, I let out a long whistle.

“Well, holy fuck-nuggets…”

“Holy fuck-nuggets indeed… If we don’t find these orb shards and get home, Nah’Lek will fulfil his plan of revenge, and will burn our entire planet to ash and dust…” Twilight told me, her eyes widening with fear.

I raised my eyebrows.

“So he basically tried to destroy Equestria for his father, Appleox?" I quizzed.

She nodded to confirm.

"Talk about being a daddy’s boy…” I muttered.

Twilight looked at me, frowning; I looked back with a guilty smile. She continued to stare at me with this disapproving look for about a full minute, before her lip began to quiver; ever so slowly the corners of her lips began to raise.

She was JUST about to give in and smile when we both heard Rainbow Dash screaming.

“Rainbow Dash!” I hollered.

“GUYS! IT’S COMING! IT’S COMING THIS WAY!” She screeched.

I looked to the road to see Rainbow Dash sprinting like a fifty calibre bullet; she skidded as she turned to face us and dashed into the park with us; when she reached us she didn’t stop and disappeared into the next road.
Twilight and I slowly turned behind us as we heard the thundering footsteps; I gulped as the shadow began to loom over our heads.

“Twilight… I want you, to very slowly, go after Rainbow Dash…” I ordered.

Twilight said nothing and backed away whimpering, I pulled Kroksbane from its sheath and looked up to face my foe.

“So, do you want to do this now? Or shall we go for lunch first?” I asked.

The creature extended its foot-long claws and squatted down to look me in the eye, before towering up above me and roaring at the top of its lungs, almost deafening me. I tilted my head and licked my dry bottom lip to moisturise it; I took a deep breath and raised my knife.

“Well…” I paused, “Let’s dance…”

The beast roared again and darted towards me, it swiped at me and I ducked out of the way, then it opened its wide maw and gnashed at me, I rolled forward and slid through its legs, cutting open its inner thigh with my knife.
After a small yelp, it growled and tried to pounce on me; I quickly dodged to the left and sliced at its face, leaving a deep gash across its right cheek; I jumped back instantly, and rightly so as the beast whipped round in a flash and snapped at where my hand was only a second before.
I knew I had to work on defence and evading, if those claws landed a good strike on my body I would be dead in an instant. I never stood in once place and circled the monster, evading and counter-attacking when I had the chance. My plan was to wear it out, and plant a good stab when it was exhausted, but it looked like this creature had a lot of stamina, I just hoped it had less than me.

It took another swipe at my head and I ducked again, thrusting my arm upwards and slashing its wrist open. Dark red blood splattered down onto me and I quickly rolled away from a swipe that very nearly took my arm off completely. The beast seemed to get more and more enraged as it missed me, it was savage enough without getting extra pissed off; I needed to tire it out more.
With a loud roar, it began to charge at me, I waited until the last second before quickly diving to my right and rolling back to a standing position, I ran to the park’s swing set and began playing cat and mouse with the creature, every time it went around the swing set to get me, I’d slip in between the swings to the other side. The beast grew more and more frustrated as it ran back and forth to get me, it ran faster and faster in attempt to catch me while I spent little energy darting back and forth.
The creature gave up this technique and tried to pounce at me through the swing set, the swing’s chains caught on its arms and it was stuck for a quick moment; this was my time to strike, I rushed forward and thrust the knife into its gut, I twisted the blade and yanked it out again.
The monster screeched with pain and rage, it thrashed side to side and tore the swing set out of the ground completely; it threw the metal frame at me and I dived to the side, it narrowly missed me and smashed into the ground next to me. I tried to pick myself up but I was too slow, the savage creature reached me and picked me up in its large hand, it began squeezing me tightly and lifted me into the air.

“Gah!” I cried out in pain as it squeezed the air out of me.

It held me up to its face and looked me dead in the eyes, before raising its other hand and extending its claws; with all my might I was able to free my right arm and I stabbed it through the wrist, the beast let go of me and wailed in pain, I hit the ground with a thud and I got to my feet painfully and turned around just as the creature whipped around and smacked me with its long tail, I was sent into the air and sprawled onto the roadside.
With agony pulsing through my whole body, I quickly stood up and dashed to the nearest building, I shoulder rammed the door open and found myself in a fancy restaurant.

“I’ll have one order of whatever the fuck you cook, and some painkillers please…” I moaned, almost in tears.

I gritted my teeth and squatted over to recover my breath, only for the monster to smash through the large window and roar at me. I screamed like a little girl and sprinted to the back of the room; I ran into the closest toilet, which happened to be the women’s and once again squatted to recover my breath; it seemed the beast wouldn't be able to get inside so I had a moment to recover.

When I got my breath back I looked around and saw how clean the room was, it was almost pristine; and this was in a radioactive waste city.

“Dear lord! You women have such beautiful toilets! How come men’s toilets are so filthy!?” I exclaimed.

I used a paper towel to clean some of the blood of Kroksbane, and then decided that I genuinely needed the toilet, so I took this time for a pee break; I went into a cubicle and began to do my business. I zipped up my flies and was about to leave the cubicle when I heard the bathroom door burst open and a low growl rumbling; the creature was in the room...

{Fuck.} I thought to myself, gulping.

I heard the claws scraping along the wall as it approached the cubicles, I then heard the cubicle doors being torn off their hinges as they were smashed in. It was only a matter of time before it reached me; I needed to catch it off guard and make a runner. Door by door, the clawed monstrosity grew closer to me, the cubicle next to me shook violently as the door was broken down, and my door was next.
I took a deep breath and withdrew my knife, I heard the footsteps as the beast approached my door, and I quickly opened the door and rushed at the monster.

“YEEAAAARRRGGHH!!!!” I roared and slashed at the creature’s face.

My knife sliced right across its right eye and the clawed lizard recoiled, jumping back and clutching its face, screeching with rage and agony. I turned for the bathroom door and bolted, I left the restaurant and ran back into the park and beyond in the direction of Twilight and Rainbow Dash.

I had been running for about a minute when I looked back to see the beast on all fours, charging towards me, evidently in a rage.

“Eek!” I squealed and kept running.

I heard the footsteps gaining on me and I knew I’d need to turn around to defend myself, there was no outrunning this creature. I twisted around and quickly rolled to the left as the beast launched itself at me; I got to my feet and raised my knife. I repeated my technique from earlier and ducked underneath the large set of claws that swiped at me, I then slid through its legs, but this time I made sure the blow was more effective and stabbed its lower right leg and cut open the tendon in its ankle; the creature roared in agony and kicked me in the chest, sending me a few metres down the road and skidding to a halt, a pain shot through my arm and I saw a massive graze along my outer wrist that stung like a bitch. I got to my feet and dodged the next attempted pounce, as it swung around for another attack it stumbled and almost fell over; it was evidently getting very dizzy and had lost a lot of blood now, a few more well-landed attacks and I should be able to finish it off.

“Come on! I'm right here!” I taunted.

It tried to pounce at me again, and I darted forward and to the left, where I was able to quickly stab the beast in the lower back and dodge the counter-attack as it whipped around and tried to claw at me. It clawed a second time and caught my shoulder, I growled as I felt warm blood begin to trickle down my arm. It gave a third attempt at clawing me and I slipped under its left arm and planted another strike underneath its armpit, the knife went in deep and punctured the lung. I pulled the knife out and dropped to the ground to avoid the other arm as it swiped at me; I didn't hesitate my next attack and stabbed the right leg again, this time I slashed to the side as I removed the blade and the whole tendon snapped, I saw the tendon curl up the back of its leg up to its knee. It screeched louder than ever and hopped twice on its other leg before falling over onto me, I had to finish it now or I’d be dead for sure.
I took my knife and trust it into the creature's belly, and stabbed it again and again and again. Thick blood poured out of the its gut and began coating me from head to toe, but I kept on stabbing, over and over again, not holding back.
The beast thrashed around, trying to get up and kill me, but it lacked the strength as it lost pint after pint of blood, it gave one final attempt at getting up, before roaring one final time and flopping onto me, the weight of the limp body almost crushed me and I couldn't move.

I lay there under the bloody corpse for a good five minutes before I heard a pair of hoofsteps.

“Twilight! Look!” I heard Rainbow Dash call out.

“Gosh… It’s dead…” She replied.

I tried to move, but the body barely shifted and I turned my head towards a small gap.

“Hey, a little help here!?” I coughed.

“Holy shit! He’s underneath it!” Dash exclaimed.

The hoofsteps approached me and I felt the weight of the body slowly shift off me, I pushed with all my might and was able to roll it off me, I slowly got to my feet and turned around; Rainbow Dash now stood before me, a look of disbelief on her face.

“Dude… You… You killed it…” She breathed.

“Yeah, but it wasn’t exactly easy; I dare say Elephant’s Foot was easier to kill than this thing…” I mumbled.

“Good job, but you’re going to need to clear yourself up; you look like you’ve had a bath in blood.” Said Twilight.

I chuckled and pulled Kroksbane out of the lizard’s belly, I wiped most of the blood on its upper arm and sheathed the blade. I looked back to the others and sighed with relief.

“Well, that’s that sorted.” I smirked.

“Indeed, now let’s get out of here before we get chased by any other weird radioactive mutants out here.” Twilight ordered.

“You don’t need to tell me twice.” I laughed.

I took one more look at the lizard’s body, before walking down the road and out of the town, with Twilight and Rainbow Dash on either side of me…

“Hey look! They’re back! They’re back!” Applejack shouted to the others as we approached the old shack.

“Oh my gosh, where!?” Pinkie squealed and burst through the door.

She saw us and began bouncing towards us, the others also left the shack and ran towards us; but as they grew closer their faces of excitement and delight, changed to horror and worry.

“What happened to y’all? You look like you’ve all been through an apple grinder!” Applejack asked.

“Feels like it too…” I muttered.

“You’re covered in blood, all of you! It’s not yours is it? And if not, whose was it? What happened?” Fluttershy demanded to know, worry overcoming her.

“It’s not ours Flutters, just let us relax for a moment and we’ll tell you all about it…” Rainbow Dash sighed in reply.

“Oh gosh, you must all be simply exhausted! Not to worry my darlings, we’ve got a fire set up and I was about to start making dinner with Applejack. Rainbow and Twilight, we’ve got daisy and hay sandwiches. Callum, we have plenty of mayonnaise and salted potato chips for you.” Rarity kindly offered as we headed towards the shack.

“And so, after losing the horde, I made my way back to the others; but I didn’t look where I was going and ran head-first into… The deathclaw!” Rainbow Dash burst out.

Pinkie and Fluttershy squealed in fear and hugged each other with panic, before calming down and letting go of each other. A few hours had passed and we had all eaten some food and cleared up the blood and dirt from ourselves, and had decided to let Rainbow tell most of the story about our adventure in Chernobyl.

“The beast roared at me, and began to chase me; but he could never catch me, even without my wings! I kept my cool and ran away, but he didn’t give up that easy. It was gaining on me, that’s when I finally reached the others; Twilight came with me while Callum stayed behind to fight it alone.”

Dash leant over to me and nudged me.

“Total… Badass…” She hissed, making sure everyone heard her.

I rolled my eyes and elbowed her playfully.

“Anyway…” she continued, “Twilight and I kept going for a while, before waiting out for Callum; about half an hour later we feared for the worse and went back to look for him. That’s when we found the deathclaw, curled up in a pool of its own blood… And that’s when we heard Callum calling us from underneath it; we moved the body and there he was, covered in the creature’s blood after just killing the beast!”

The group all looked from Rainbow Dash, to me; a look of sheer awe upon their faces.

“And before you start complaining Fluttershy, no, this creature could not be tamed or befriended, it was a radioactive mutant, not a mere animal.” I told Fluttershy.

She dipped her head in understanding and I took a well deserved stretch.

“Well, I’m off to get some kip, we’ve got a big day tomorrow.” I yawned.

“Where do you think the next shard will be?” Twilight asked.

“I haven’t the slightest idea.” I replied.

I walked over to the shack’s front door and was about to head out to my tent, when I looked back at her.

“But I do know one thing…” I told her.

She tilted her head with curiosity, and I looked her in the eyes for a few seconds before speaking…

“This quest is far from over…”

Epilogue: A Royal Omen

Epilogue: Your Royal Highness

The royal throne hall was silent as outer space, not a single sound was to be heard; the moonlight shone through the stained glass windows that showed significant parts of Equestria’s history, creating faint beams of coloured light throughout the room. In the silence, a shadow slipped by and darted across the floor towards the royal thrones.

On the left side was Princess Luna’s throne. Made entirely from midnight blue marble the throne had spiralling patterns of star constellations dotted here and there, and at the very top sat an engraved crescent moon; the armrests had the different stages of the lunar cycle engraved along the top.
There was a navy blue cushion on the seat with a full moon printed on it, the cushion was made of silk from the giant spiders that dwelled on Kra Island, a place to the far west of Equestria; a place that housed all sorts of terrifying creatures from ages past, the silk from a giant spider was tougher than Kevlar, yet also soft as the fur on a velveteen rabbit…
Beside Luna’s, was the throne of Princess Celestia; akin to Luna’s, it was made from only the purest of marble, this time a fair primrose opposed to Luna's midnight blue. The throne was slightly taller than Luna’s, and had patterns of dancing flames all the way up to the top, where there was a large carving of the sun. The armrests had more flame patterns and the seat had a large white cushion, made from the same silk as Luna’s.
Both thrones were truly unique, yet no less beautiful than the other.

The shadow slowly rose out of the ground and developed a physical form, it grew to about eight feet before the black smoke surrounding the shadow dissipated, revealing Nah’Lek, the Defiler…
Stepping towards the throne, most of the demi-god's form was still concealed with a large cloak; all that could be seen were six plated legs on either side of his body, and five lifeless purple eyes that faintly glowed from beneath the hood of his torn mantle.

“Nafì’u ‘awpo eyktan… Ohe eyk tsamsiyu ne tsam ye’rìn; ulte krra Ohe si, nìwotx nìsoaia terkup…” He chuckled to himself, pulling a short blade from his cloak.

He began to carve deep into Princess Celestia’s throne, scratching into the marble to create a message; the sound was similar to a fork scraping down a dinnerplate.
Following that, was the sound of hoof steps, and the royal courtroom's door being burst open.

“Intruder! Back away from the royal throne and state your name!” Ordered a royal guard.

Nah’Lek slowly turned around without a shred of anxiety, and glared at the two guards whom had disturbed his vandalism. With their spears levitating beside them, the guards were almost frozen solid upon making contact with the amethyst eyes, devoid of life. Despite the terror coursing through them, the guards remained vigilant to their duty, and began to approach The Defiler.

“Lower the blade, or we will attack.” The second guard commanded.

“I’m counting on it…” The cloaked demon replied.

In the blink of an eye, Nah’Lek flicked a claw and the blade whizzed like a bullet into the guard’s throat, his spear dropped to the ground almost as fast as he did. Clutching his throat in agony, he desperately tried to gasp for air, only for blood to seep into his lungs.

“Copper Horn!” The other guard cried out, rushing to his companion’s side.

Seconds later, and Copper Horn was dead, blood oozing from his mouth and nose.
Now alone, the guard looked back to Nah'Lek to find the assailant had disappeared, he looked around frantically with both spears floating either side of him, trying to spot the creature before it was too late.

“Foolish creature, I assumed you were Celestia's finest protectors…”

Nah’Lek’s coarse demonic voice rippled throughout the room, bouncing off the walls and viciously breaking away at the guard's strength and vigilance, his forehead began to sweat as his heartrate grew faster and faster.

“A guard of royalty, trained to be fearless in battle. Yet you stand here, terrified out of your pathetic pony mind."

“I... I'm not afraid of you, creature...” The guard muttered, pacing in circles.

Tears began to run down his cheeks, whatever this creature was, it was going to kill him and he knew it.
Nah'Lek's jaw lightly quivered with euphoria, delighting in every second of toying with his prey; all the while slowly descending from a single line of his own sticky silk.

“Look at the little bug, spinning in a circle, not quite sure of where to go...
Does he run? Does he scream? Does he fight? Where is his foe?
To the left? To the right? No...
Forward or backward? No...
How about beneath him? No...
Have you looked up above, fearless defender of the throne?"

Crying to himself and urinating on the spot, the guard slowly tilted his head upwards as two swords stroked in either direction, slicing his head off completely. His body dropped to the ground and splashed into his own puddle of piss, all while his head rolled to a stop, lips continuing to tremble.

“No...” Nah’Lek hissed.

The Defiler sheathed his swords and released himself from his web and approached the guard’s body, and pushed his claws deep into where the head used to be, drenching them in thick, warm blood. He then walked back to Princess Celestia’s throne and wiped the blood all over the message he’d engraved, making the message more visible as the crimson liquid seeped into the etchings in the stone.

Nah’Lek stood there for a moment, admiring his work and listening carefully to the sounds around him; before suddenly whipping around and withdrawing his swords again, slicing at his new target, only for his blades to be blocked by a gigantic hovering silver sword, trimmed in gold and illuminated by a magical aura.

“So… Here we are again…” Nah’Lek grumbled.

“So it would seem… Nah'Lek...” Said Princess Celestia.

Nah’Lek jumped back and then sprung himself off the throne, gliding over Celestia and landing a few metres behind her; much to the princess’s surprise however, he did not attack, but instead backed away.
She took a step forward and swung her blade at him, only for him to dart out of the way, she continued to consistently swing her weapon at him, to which he merely slinked out of reach from each strike.

“You return to my kingdom, desecrate my throne, kill my loyal subjects, and then tease me…
Why do you not fight me with honour, beast?” Celestia asked, gritting her teeth.

“I wish to kill you in the daylight, when your subjects are watching…” He chuckled deviously, sheathing his swords.

Celestia bared her teeth in anger and fired a laser from her horn, to which Nah’Lek easily dodged.

“Fight me! You coward!” The princess barked.

Nah’Lek hopped away from yet another swing and removed a staff from his back, he aimed at the floor between them and fired a burst of bright emerald magic, which upon impact created a dark portal that emitted wisps of green energy. Princess Celestia was all too familiar with this magic and recoiled in fear, growling at the Defiler with seething hatred as he approached the swirling void.

“All in good time… Your Royal Highness…” He hissed as he entered the portal.

As soon as he crawled into the smoky entrance, it closed behind him and generated a sonic boom, which rippled throughout the hall and shattered every single window; the princess created a force field around herself to evade the shards of glass as they showered across the room.

Deactivating the shield, Princess Celestia looked around with tears in her bloodshot eyes; she had worked so hard to restore order and peace after the bitter hardships that had come to Equestria over the millennia, and now the worst evil imaginable had returned, with a vengence…
A bright flash of blue light lit up the hall, followed by Princess Luna rushing to Celestia's side.

“Sister! Are you alright!?” She cried out with worry.

“I am fine, little sister… But I fear the six do not have as much time as we thought…” Celestia replied.

The sisters walked to their thrones, where they read Nah’Lek’s blood splattered message.

Oe kxakx a trr’ong

“'I Will Break The Dawn...' Written in the language of old… It’s really him, isn’t it…?” Luna muttered with worry.

“I’m afraid so, Nah’Lek truly has returned…” Celestia sighed.

The princesses reluctantly approached the dead guards and used their magic to clear up the blood and urine, and then placed the bodies side by side; Princess Luna closed Copper Horn's lifeless eyes with her hoof.

“Do you think it was wise, sending all six of them without the elements of harmony?” She asked, looking at her sister.

Princess Celestia looked out the broken window into the night, and sighed once more.

“I don’t know little sister… I don’t know…”

Luna stood beside her and placed a foreleg over her neck.

“The boy will keep them safe... I know he will...” She said reassuringly.

“I know that too, but now more than ever, no chances can be taken, which is why I gave Twilight the vision.”

“I still think the vision was unnecessary sister, young Twilight will no-doubt take it too far. Neither of you remained long enough to witness what I did, your student has seen an obscured truth, and your refusal to heed my council will take its toll on the company. Twilight still has much to learn; including self-control.” Luna sighed.

Celestia, too, gave a long sigh and turned around to face her sister.

“Twilight saw what she needed to see, the added complication you received from Callum changes nothing, and telling Twilight would only bring further confusion to her."

She paused before looking back out into the night sky.

"But perhaps you are right, Luna... Perhaps I have rushed her into this..."

Princess Luna draped a wing over her sister and looked out at the stars.

“There is little we can do now, we must trust in them, and hope they succeed in their mission...
Before Nah’Lek succeeds in his…”

Prologue: Tell Me a Story

Prologue: Tell Me a Story...

"Mama?" The young filly asked.

Her mother looked down to her precious daughter, so young, and yet so full of life already.

"What is it, my little angel?"

The filly sat there, looking up at her mother with gleaming sparkles in her eyes.

"Why does Princess Celestia do everything?" She innocently asked.

At this, her mother chuckled lightly and rustled the young one's mane.

"Princess Celestia doesn't do everything sweetie, she has other ponies to help her, called advisers. Her sister, Princess Luna used to help a lot before she turned into Nightmare Moon, there used to be a time where they ruled Equestria together. Celestia is very old as well, meaning that she is incredibly smart, and wise."

The filly thought about this for a few seconds, then had another question.

"What happened to Celestia's mummy?"

The filly's mother wasn't sure whether to laugh, or to frown. The Princess of the Sun's foalhood was a very serious topic, she had studied it at the Canterlot University in her youth. She looked at the clock to find it was nearly eight o'clock.

"It's getting late honey, go brush your teeth and get into bed, and I'll tell you all about it."

The filly gasped, another bedtime story! She ran upstairs without uttering another word.
Breathing out through her nose, the mare acknowledged that if she told the story to her foal, she wouldn't hear the end of it for months on end; she shrugged and thought that it could do no harm, besides, it was a brilliant story. Walking into the living room, the mare found her husband explaining the 'birds and the bees' to their son.

"And that's pretty much the basics. Now, if you have any more questions, you ask your mother."

Another puff of air left her nose from both amusement and displeasure, it was rather obvious to what her other half had done, he clearly didn't want to explain all of the detailed procedures in the bedroom, so he thought he could pass it on to her instead.

{Sneaky lil' git.} She thought to herself.

"Mum," her son ran up to her, "what's a labi-"

"Not now, silly!" his father scolded.

The young colt, still curious and full of questions, reluctantly nodded, and scarpered to his room.

"Why hello there, sweet flanks." The stallion said to his wife, in his deep, seductive tone.

Purposefully ignoring his flirting, and went to give him a hug, instead of the kiss he was expecting. Even in their marriage, playing hard to get kept things fun, teasing him was one of her best pastimes when they were alone together; she gave him a small kiss on the neck and then pulled back to face him.

"I've just sent our little angel off to bed, she wants to know about the origin of her royal highness."

The stallion rolled his eyes.

"I swear the only thing she's interested in is learning, she has barely any friends in kindergarten." He said.

"I know," the mare replied, "but you never know, in time it might have some sort of reverse effect, all the other young ones might want to hang out with her if she's the smart one."

The stallion let out a small chuckle, his usual one-syllable 'Hah.

"Since when has anypony liked the smart one? They're just interested in the cool kids who constantly cause ruckus in the classroom. But you're right, you never know, she might make friends with another one of the smarties. Just don't expect me to sit there with you, I've done enough explaining for one night."

"So I heard." The mare giggled. "I'll only be ten minutes, then I'm going to bed."

"Straight to sleep?" He hinted.

"Yes."

With that, she pecked her husband on the cheek and headed upstairs, leaving him mildly disappointed.

The little filly's bedroom door opened, revealing her mother.

"I brushed my teeth!" The filly announced.

"Show me."

Baring her teeth, her mother inspected them and then planted a kiss on her forehead, satisfied. She tucked her daughter in and sat down beside the bed, resting against the bedside table.

"Are you going to tell me a story?"

"Yes, and it's a very special story."

While the filly wriggled into a comfortable position, her mother pondered on how she was going to word the fable, it was rather complex and she didn't want to say anything that would confuse her foal too much.

"Alright babe, this story is about how Equestria was made, and where the Princesses came from." She replied.

"Ooh, ooh, tell me!" The young one squeaked, eager to learn.

"Hush now honey... I won't tell you if you don't settle down."

In an instant the filly went limp, and became as silent as a door mouse; she loved learning more than anything in the whole wide world. Her mother couldn't help but be reminded of herself when she was younger.

"Now then-" Her mother started, but was interrupted by her son bursting into the room.

"Ma, can I ask you something?"

Due to what she'd just heard downstairs, it was abundantly clear on what that 'something' was.

"Not right now honey, you can ask me after I've told your sister her bedtime story, off to bed now."

Her son, obediently trotted off to his room; his mother rolled her eyes, then closed the bedroom door with her magic.
She then turned back to her daughter, who was patiently waiting; she nuzzled her foal before beginning her story.

"Alright then sweetie, this is the story of how Equus, came to be...
Once upon a time, there were six magical creatures, called the Holy Titans of Harmony, the Titans were enormous, bigger than the Great Mountain."

"The mountain Canterlot sits on?" The filly asked.

Her mother smiled, and nodded.

"That's the one; now then...
These titans, worked together to create our planet, Equus; it took them over a thousand years to make it. When it was finally done, they made these tiny living things called cells, these grew into all the animals and plants in the world we see today, even us."

The filly had seen cells under a microscope at kindergarten, but she wasn't told where they came from, so being told about their origin along with the Titans was like music to her ears.

"The Titans then created a great big ball, called the Titan's Orb, this orb surrounds Equus in a great big bubble, a shield that cannot be destroyed, ever, this is so all the bad monsters can never come to our world."

Scowling, the filly's mother pretended to be a large monster and towered over the bed with her hooves held high, letting out a playful hiss and moving towards her daughter, who started to giggle; this giggle became laughter as her mother pretended to be repelled by the forcefield and made a loud retching noise, shrinking backwards and down to the ground.

"You, my darling, are safe." She said kindly, getting back up and calming her daughter down.

The filly reached up and gave her mother a cuddle, before letting her continue with the story.

"The Titan's created something else as well...
A special sword, known as the Titan's Sword, it has another name in a strange language, but I don't remember it. This sword was given to a very special pony by the Titans themselves. This pony was the protector of Equus, and only he could hold the sword, nopony else could even try, only the worthy could use it without being hurt. The sword chooses its owner, not even Princess Celestia can use it, it is only to be used by the chosen one."

Her daughter's pupils expanded, mesmerised by every word, completely starstruck with this new information.

"One day," the mare continued, "the Titan of Mass, called Appleox, turned evil, and he gobbled up the other Titans."

"He gobbled them up?" The filly squeaked.

"Indeed, he did," Her mother nodded, "but something really special, happened just before..."

The filly sat up in her bed, too excited to lie still, she was ecstatic, desperate to find out more.

"What? What happened?" She squeaked.

Her mother calmed her daughter down again before continuing, she placed a hoof on her child's chest and lightly laid her back down with a warm smile.

"The Titan of Mana, called Twilus, realised that Appleox was going to eat her, so she used all her powers, to create two, very special ponies."

"The Princesses?" The filly asked.

Her mother giggled.

"That's right my little angel, Twilus created Princess Celestia and Luna. She then sent them to Equus to rule Equestria, and to protect the country. Twilus was then gobbled up by Appleox."

"What happened then?" The filly asked.

"Appleox tried to gobble up Equus too, but he couldn't. The Titan’s Orb knew he had turned into a monster, and made sure he couldn't hurt us, it stopped his attack and gave him a big magical shock. Appleox ran away, knowing he could never harm our world again, the Orb keeps us safe."

The filly said nothing this time, she simply stared in awe at her mother, amazed that this was all true. So many questions circled her little head, what did the Titans look like? How big were they? Where was Appleox now? Maybe she could wield the Titan's Sword? Maybe if she tried really, really hard!

"Well, that's about it." Her mother said before getting up.

"Wait!" Squeaked the filly.

Her mother raised an eyebrow.

"What happened to the hero, with the sword?"

"This all happened thousands and thousands of years ago, sweetie. The hero passed away so long ago, no one can even remember his name." She answered.

"What about the sword?"

Her mother sighed, it seemed that she'd never get away from the seething mass of questions her foal would now have.

"The sword is kept safe beside the Titan’s Orb, deep within the Canterlot Caves." She finished.

"Will the sword choose anypony again?" The filly asked her last question.

Her mother could tell in her daughter's voice that it was her final question, and to be honest, it was a question that even the mare questioned herself on occasion.

"Well, an old legend says that one day, when Equus is in grave danger, and when hope is almost lost, a new hero will rise, and will be chosen by the sword, and will save the world." She finally concluded.

The filly lay there for a good five seconds before speaking.

"Wow..."

The mare smiled at her daughter, who was now curling up in bed, quietly thinking about everything she had learned.

"Goodnight my little angel..." She whispered before kissing her kin on the forehead, and left the room.

Fourteen years later, deep within the Canterlot Caves.

A shadow, unnoticed, and unheard, slithered between the rocks, closer and closer to its target, the numerous guards had no idea what was coming. It was then when a tiny stone was dropped behind a large cluster of crystals, only one of the guards noticed.

"Huh?" He mumbled, walking towards the sound.

{Hm, how witless, leaving the light... } The dark form thought to itself as it waited patiently for its prey.

The guard walked behind the rock to investigate, and before he could even blink, a razor-sharp blade was placed under his chin and gashed his throat open, within seconds, he was dead.

{Next...} The creature thought, crawling up a stone pillar and onto the ceiling.

Upside down, submerged in shadow, none of the guards could even contemplate the unimaginable peril that lurked directly above them, mentally mapping out their patrols, observing their movements, and planning how each of them would die.

Within the next half hour another six guards had been killed, only three remained.

"Hey, where did the others go?" Asked the Captain of the Guard.

"I last saw Coinhoof going around the crystal pillar over there."

The captain walked off in search of his fellow guards, while the other two remained in place. If only he had looked up, he might have spotted the faintly glowing eyes looking back down at him.

{When you get back, you're going to find a rather curious sight, your brothers in arms, mangled and cold...
I wonder if you'll scream, I do hope you scream...} The creature thought to itself.

It made its way to the guards, isolated and only a metre apart; it was only too easy.

{Such facile pickings.} It thought, drawing its main blades.

Before the knew what was happening, the adversary had dropped down the ground and landed behind them; a creature of such size shouldn't have been able to remain so quiet, it sounded no louder than a pebble lightly clattering on the ground. The noise was enough to cause them to turn around, but before they could properly glimpse at the beast, it had swung its blades, beheading them both in one X-shaped swipe.

The Captain of the Guard's right ear twitched; what was that sound?
Now alone, with no idea of what was happening around him, carried on walking in search of his brethren. He then noticed a trail of liquid, pooling in some parts of the uneven stone floor; with the little light provided, he couldn't distinguish the liquid, and decided to follow it in order to investigate.
His investigation fell short, as he stumbled upon the corpse of his fellow guardsman, Coinhoof.

"Ah... Ah! AHHHH!" He screamed, bolting.

The creature had to act fast, if the alarm was raised now, it would fail in its task. It sheathed its blades and darted towards the captain at an alarming speed, skittering across the floor faster than any creature know to ponykind. It launched at him, smacking into him with full force, driving him into the ground so hard that it cracked open one of his legs at the shinbone.

"GAAAAHH!" He howled in pain, squeezing his eyes shut, writhing in agony.

"Pathetic..." The creature spoke, in a dark, demonic voice.

The captain opened his eyes, and quite literally soiled himself; he could not speak, for the sight before his eyes was so horrifying that it left him petrified. By the time he could snap out of it, the creature was already tearing into his flesh, ripping hide from muscle, and then muscle from bone.
His screams echoed all throughout the Canterlot Caves, until it stopped abruptly.
The creature dropped the limp body, and headed towards its prize...

The Titan's Orb sat there on a small podium, along with the Titan's Sword, embedded within the podium itself. All but a force field was between the creature, and the only thing truly protecting Equus. The creature the placed it's claws on the force field, the field of energy glowed a brighter light where the claws touched. From his back, he withdrew a long staff, and placed it against the forcefield. A sickly green mist oozed from the tip of the staff, and began to merge with the forcefield; it spread like a poison until the entire magical bubble was a bright emerald, it then grew darker and darker until the bubble had become black. That's when it collapsed upon itself, and disintegrated into dust, and then vanished altogether.

"Finally..." The ungodly creature spoke, it's teeth still dripping with pony blood.

The creature of pure evil climbed the small array of steps, and stood before the podium, it placed the tip of the staff onto the Titan's Orb, as it did so, the orb fizzed a little.

"Tung tìkawng tompa ne kifkey! Set terkup si tìkawng nekx fra'u!" The creature growled, its demonic voice rippling through the caves.

More sickly green magic emerged from the staff and coated the orb, causing it to rise into the air, fizzing even more now, the podium started to crack, the edges crumbled, and in seconds, the entire podium shattered into tiny pieces; the sword fell to the ground, it glowed a bright blue, but as the dark magic reached it, the glow went out and the whole blade turned black.
The orb too, turned black before spinning at an incredible speed, the sword did the same, spinning around, faster and faster, both relics began to spit red sparks everywhere amongst the sickly green hue of the demonic magic.

BOOM!

The cave shook, a few crystals shattered into tiny fragments from the sheer force of the calamity. As the smoke cleared, the Orb and the sword were gone; nothing remained but the burnt rock beneath it, and the creature, whom let out a small chuckle.

"Yes..." It hissed as it slithered away into the shadows,

"The end of all days will be here soon, Equus will burn, and every living thing, shall die..."

Chapter Six: The Last Walk

Chapter Six: New Methods Of Transportation

I felt weightless, as though I were underwater, I couldn't hear a bloody thing, nor could I see anything. I went to look at my hands, only to find there was nothing there.
As a matter of fact, I appeared to be lacking a body entirely.

{What the hell is going on? Where am I?} I tried to say aloud, but the words only echoed in my mind as thought.

At last, I saw something in the distance, a black orb of sorts, no bigger than a tennis ball.
The shape was coming towards me at a rather alarming rate, growing bigger and bigger as it did so; within seconds it had grown to the size of a car, and it had begun to emit noise, just loud white noise, like a strong wind upon a mountain peak. The black ball was now the size of a large house, while I couldn't judge the distance, I was certain that it was about to hit me, and the worst part is that I couldn't close my eyes, I had to stare at this enormous object that was about to completely engulf and obliterate me; in my terror I tried to shout out.

{NONONO! NO! HOLY SH-}

The black object collided with me, the deafening noise stopped, and everything went black.

Consciousness slowly returned to me, (although I would have much preferred it hadn't).
Within seconds, a throbbing pain pulsated through my head and my skin got pins and needles all over, I also weirdly enough felt pins and needles in my tongue, which was certainly a new experience, a very unpleasant one at that.
I couldn't see a thing, nor could I hear anything, well, nothing besides a nauseating high pitched ringing, it was as if a flashbang grenade had gone off in my face.
After a few moments of lying there trying to regain my senses, I heard a faint voice over all the distortion.

"Callum?"

I barely heard it, it was all muffled and echoic; I then felt a nudging against my arm. The voice spoke again, a little less muffled and more understandable this time, I was just able to make it out.

"Callum, can you hear me? Are you alright?"

The voice was female, gentle and formal in tone, I assumed it was Rarity. I squinted my eyes tightly and then re-opened them to see a big white fuzzy blob in front of me, I groaned as I felt a hoof nudge my arm. Without warning, a massive black blob pinned me down and I instantly had my face besieged by a huge, warm, wet tongue; I shook my head and blinked a few times to find it was Archer lapping at my face, I pushed his muzzle away with my hand.

"Get off me, ye filthy old parsnip." I groaned.

Blinking a few times to properly regain my vision, I found the girls surrounding me, with Rarity kneeling beside me; she gave a sigh of relief and put a foreleg around my neck, giving me a brief hug before standing up.

"Thank goodness you're alright, I tried to wake you but you didn't respond." She said as she assisted Fluttershy in pulling Archer away from me.

"What happened?" I asked.

"You blacked out, been out for a couple minutes." She replied.

"Why?" I asked, "Does that happen every time you use a Pullie Portal?"

Rarity shook her head, and amazingly Twilight had the kindness to explain.

"There have actually been a few cases of ponies blacking out when exposed to teleportation spells, oddly enough it's happened to earth ponies far more often than with unicorns and pegasi. It's an educated guess but I would presume that you're resistant to magic, studies have shown that ponies with magic resistance have similar reactions."

"I see..." I grumbled.

"Well, other than you hitting the ground like a sack of apples, the Pullie Portal is good to go."

Rolling my eyes, I gave my head a quick shake and then took the dog leads from Fluttershy and used the back gate to leave the garden and enter the local field beside the land; Twilight cast the invisibility spell onto Rarity and Flutters and warned that they would only have roughly half an hour before the spells wore off.

"Damn, that's weird..." I muttered.

Both Rarity and Fluttershy were now rendered completely incognito, they didn't even cast shadows, the only thing that could be seen was a faint distortion in the light where they stood, not too dissimilar from alien creature in the movie Predator.

"It doesn't last too long, so let's not dilly-dally." Rarity emitted from her new imperceptible form.

With that, we set off across the field and in the direction of Bruce's house.

I looked at Chilli and Archer, both of them had their tongues lolling out without a care in the world; they seemed absolutely fine with two invisible talking equine aliens trotting along beside them. Taking a look around, there were only a few farm buildings in the area with no house in sight.
Deciding to get a move-on, I beckoned the dogs by lightly tugging on their leads and my way through the field and toward a dense orchard. Archer lazily obeyed and plodded along behind me, barely wanting to exert the energy, Chilli on the other hand, excitedly pranced next to my leg as though she were on bloody Crufts.
As we emerged from the trees and into the next open field, the summer sun greeted us kindly, wrapping us in its warmth; the cooling breeze that accompanied the weather was a perfect balance, and we thoroughly enjoyed the trek. It didn't take us all that long to cross the fields and to the oaks beyond them, which is where the main road was found. A few houses could be seen just down the lane, I took my phone out of my pocket and examined the screenshot I'd taken from Google Maps, then looked at all the visible houses, and just in the distance I spotted Bruce's house.

"What an awfully wide path." Rarity hummed with curiosity.

Before I could say anything, the unicorn had stuck her head out of the trees was about to step out, not realising until the last moment that a car was hurtling down the road, and before she knew what was up, the vehicle whizzed by at about fifty miles an hour and almost took poor Rarity's head off, she yelped and jumped back, stumbling over onto her bottom, her invisibility was abruptly dispelled and I could see her again, her eyes wide with confused terror.

"Jeez, Rarity! Are you alright?" I asked, kneeling down to check if she was okay, which luckily she was.

"Wha... What in bloody Tartarus was that?" She panted, still getting over the scare.

"That my dear, was a car, and this is a road, not a path. And it's for reasons like this why we always look left and right before crossing a road, roads are specifically for cars, so they can get around with speed." I explained.

"Goodness, if I was any further out there, it would have hit me." She muttered, still shaking.

"That's why we don't cross roads without looking both ways first, cars never stop, especially at that speed, and especially not for invisible ponies!"

"Well, I will most certainly keep that in mind," Rarity sighed, calming down, "Twilight had told me about cars, but I've never seen one for myself, they're much faster than I thought, and bigger."

"Let's just hope that you never end up seeing one that close again while it's speeding on a main road, ey? The damn thing almost splattered you." I said, gulping.

She nodded in agreement, also giving a nervous gulp. This had caused a problem, with her invisibility dispelled, she'd have to remain here in the trees for cover; needless to say she was not happy about it, but obviously there was little one could do without Twilight's proficient magic.

"We'll be as quick as possible, keep your head low and for goodness sake, don't go back onto the road." I ordered.

"Yes sir." She sighed, plonking herself down beside the nearest oak tree.

Fluttershy and I approached the road, now prepared to cross. Due to her new firsthoof experience in cars, Flutters was right by my side; after checking that the coast was clear, we crossed the road. No cars came by and we were able to the other side with ease, the only problem I noticed was the clopping of Fluttershy's hooves on the hard pavement, thinking about it actually, this would prove as a huge disadvantage for any stealth operations later on in this quest.

"Hey Flutters, do you mind stepping a little quieter? Your hooves are a tad conspicuous." I asked.

"Oh goodness, I hadn't even thought of that, sorry!"

I felt a faint gust of wind, accompanied by smaller gusts every few seconds, indicating that she had taken to flapping her wings to remain slightly off the ground.

"Any better?"

"Much better." I praised.

We continued onward to Bruce's house, it was no more than a couple minutes away.

It wasn't too far to go, when Fluttershy brought up something completely out of the blue.

"Look, Callum, I would just like to apologise for you being subjected to Twilight's behaviour, I just don't know what's gotten into her. I can promise you that she truly isn't this sort of pony back in Equestria, it's like being around a complete stranger. But that's no excuse, so I'm really sorry for how she's acted towards you."

Smiling warmly in the general direction of Fluttershy's whereabouts, I dipped my head with gratitude.

"Thank you Fluttershy, that's really nice of you to say. But it's not your apology to make, you've got nothing to be sorry for, I've got no issues with you or the other girls. I don't know what Twilight's problem is, but just as long as she is civil, I can survive with her."

She gave a bothersome 'hmm' for an answer, as she didn't really know what to say. We continued walking in silence until we were a yard or two from the house.

"How do we know this is the place?" Rarity asked.

I took my phone out of my pocket and showed her the picture, she gave another hum of acknowledgement.

I walked up to the front door, and pressed the doorbell, quietly praying that Bruce would be the one to answer; I heard footsteps, and a lock click. The door swung open, and I was greeted by with that dullard's cheesy grin.

"Callum!" He yells, jumping forward and dive hugging me.

I almost squashed Chilli upon being tackled to the ground, whom had jumped out of the way, and I playfully swatted at Bruce's head until he released me from his over-friendly grasp.

"Damn it Bruce! I thought we agreed that glomping was for Skype, only!" I coughed.

He got up and brushed himself off, then watched me with a joyful expression as I got up.

"Yeah, but since when have I ever kept to a deal?" He smirked.

"Touché." I replied.

Bruce chuckled to himself and then tended to the dogs. He squatted down to greet Chilli and made a high pitched squeaking sound that I didn't think the human body was possible of making.

"Oh my gosh! She's so sweet! I love her! She's so fluffy I'm gonna die!"

Growing jealous, Archer lumbered forward and headbutted Bruce in the chest, demanding attention, to which he merrily received as Bruce gave his side a strong patting.

"Yes, hello big boy! Yes, I know you exist, you magnificent handsome beast!"

Fluttershy emitted a giggle, to which Bruce looked around with confusion, and then looked at me.

"Callum, did you know that you laugh like Fluttershy?"

Clearing my throat loudly, I told him that there must have been a frog in my throat and then raised my eyebrows towards Flutters to warn her not to make another sound.

"Well, Bruce, we should get inside, so we can talk."

He nodded and took the dog leads from me, then headed into the house; I followed him and beckoned Fluttershy to join me, and put a finger to my lips to order her to remain quiet.

Bruce's house was incredibly cosy from the second I walked in; my house had next to no insulation, and it was always cold, while it was like a sauna here! Bruce led us into the lounge, and the first thing I noticed were two massive dog baskets with a bone in each.

"Wow, talk about hospitality." I said, smiling.

"Well I want to make a good first impression." He grinned.

I was going to reply with a witty one-liner when there was a loud squawk, followed by a bright red parrot swooping into the room and landing on Bruce's shoulder, nibbling his ear.

"Oi, no nibbling!" Bruce laughed.

It bobbed up and down in amusement before fluttering over to its cage.

"I see you have a parrot now?"

"Four actually, I've decided that I really like birds." Bruce replied with his back turned to me.

"Oh as do I, bird are just so, so wonderful..." Fluttershy hummed merrily.

Whipping around to stare at me, Bruce squinted his eyes shut and examined me.

"Okay, that Fluttershy impression is creepily weird, do it again!" He demanded.

Shaking my head, I quickly escaped the request by stating that I needed to explain what was going on, Bruce dipped his head in understanding and zipped into the kitchen to make a cup of tea for us both.
This gave me the opportunity to turn to Fluttershy and scold her.

"What the devil are you doing, Flutters? Are you trying to give us away?"

"I'm really sorry, I just couldn't help it, he's so nice!"

"Yeah well, please try not to burst out again."

"Okay, sorry..." She whispered.

Bruce entered the room with two cups of tea, alongside some custard cream biscuits, which just so happened to be my favourite biscuits, (alongside Chocolate Digestives).

"The dogs seem to be at home already." He merrily stated, pointing to Chilli.

Chilli was in her new basket gnawing on the bone as though her life depended on it; Archer then saw the second bone, and curled up in the other basket and began to chew on his new treat.

Taking a seat and sighing heavily, I took a biscuit and dunked it into my tea, and then quickly popping it into my mouth before it broke apart in the mug.

"So Callum, spit it out already, what the bloody hell have you gotten yourself into?"

Rubbing the back of my neck, I tried to figure out how to best articulate this situation.

"Well, it's not easy to explain, so please bare with me okay?"

Nodding, Bruce munched on a custard cream while I thought up how best to describe the mad new situation that I had just willingly thrown my entire life away for.

"So... Well... I uh... Um... Look, there's no easy way to say it, I'm faking my death."

Raising his eyebrows, Bruce loudly slurped at his tea, before plonking his mug back down on the coffee table.

"For real? Why?"

"I've signed myself up for a certain task, something that requires me to leave my life behind and to disappear without a trace, it's something on a planetary scale of importance and I need to make sure nobody knows I'm still out there somewhere, you know?"

"To be honest with you, no, I don't know. Care to be a bit more specific?"

The parrot squawked loudly again for no apparent reason, causing Chilli to start barking at it, which in turn caused Fluttershy to emit a yelp of surprise, one of her wings accidentally hitting the parrot's cage and almost knocking it down; this caused her to jump backwards and bump her head on the doorframe, causing yet another yelp of shock and completely dispelling her invisibility. Needless to say, this was a shock for Bruce, whom stood bolt upright and stared at Fluttershy with eyes like saucers. The parrot meanwhile, was not entertained by the unfolding events and flew over to the window ledge, glaring at Chilli with ruffled feathers.

"So... Uh... How's that for specific?" I asked, sipping from my cup.

"Flu... Flut... Flutter.... Flutter-holy-shit-okay-bye-bye...." He mumbled, fainting.

Fluttershy hung her head in shame.

"Sorry..."

"Fuck sake..." I mumbled under my breath.

Archer (whom happened to be in reach of Bruce's face) decided it would be acceptable to plant his enormous tongue on Bruce's chin, and then to drag it upwards until it reached his forehead, enveloping his entire face in dog tongue.

"Mmmmmn, nada! Stinky breath! Stinky breath!" He shouted, swatting at Archer's muzzle.

Sitting bolt upright and wiping his face with a sleeve, he stared at Fluttershy yet again, gulping.

"This cannot be real, surely this cannot be real." He murmured.

"So, you know how I said this needed to stay between us?" I chuckled nervously.

"Yeah... Now it all makes a bit of sense..."

Shaking his head and pinching himself a few times, Bruce got up properly and took a sip from his tea.

"So, um... Why is Fluttershy in my house again?"

Rolling my eyes, I forced him to sit down again and gave him the full explanation, divulging on how an artefact from Equus had been sent to Earth and that the six had come here to retrieve it, and that I had somehow been chosen to be their guide, which would mean I needed to disappear from the world, hence why I was faking my death.

Bruce in turn, asked the most unexpected questions I could have imagined, given the context of our scenario; for instance, one of the first things he asked was if ponies had to pay taxes, or if they were all a bunch of commies.

After properly processing the situation, and the new reality of Equus being a real place and that ponies were on earth, Bruce finally calmed down and vowed never to mention a thing to anyone.

"I am sworn to secrecy, for the New Lunar Republic!" He cheered.

"Bruce, real world buddy... The NLR doesn't exist in Equus, at least I don't think it does." I replied.

Leaning over to face Fluttershy, I asked her if there was an actual New Lunar Republic, to which she simply said she had never heard of such a thing, which insinuated that it wasn't real.

"Eh, a man can dream." Bruce sighed, rubbing his temples.

"You okay there?" I asked.

"Migraine, I get them all the time, usually when I'm stressed, or when I have my entire belief system rocked to bloody Mars due to My Little Pony being an actual reality."

"You should probably see a doctor about that." I scoffed.

"Well I was meant to be on painkillers, but the parrots eat them all..." He chuckled.

"Oh fuck, ooffff..." I groaned.

"I don't follow." Fluttershy awkwardly spoke.

Bruce shook his head playfully, and I explained the joke to Flutters that we have a pain killer called paracetamol, and it sounds like 'parrots eat them all'.

"Oh, I get it." Fluttershy giggled.

Finishing my tea, I gave Bruce a long sigh and said that it was high time that we got a move on, as the others were patiently waiting for us. Although saddened by this news, he understood and showed us to the door.

"How long will you be gone for? A few months?" He queried upon opening the door.

"Could be years mate, we have no idea where the shards are going to be yet..." I answered.

At that, Bruce gave a whistle.

"So, I'm holding onto the dogs for good then?"

"Not necessarily, perhaps return them in a couple weeks or so via the back gate, after the dust has settled of course."

"Fair enough, I'll wait for the police to settle down as they'll probably search the area for your killer."

"Good call." I praised, nodding.

"Will I ever hear of you again?" He asked.

"If I live, you'll be the first to know." I joked, placing my hand firmly on his shoulder.

We chuckled for a bit, before he gently pushed me away.

"Well... Go on, get." He said sadly, clearly not wanting us to go.

Chilli followed me and began to whine.

"Chilli, no. You stay with Bruce." I pushed the dog away.

She gave my hand a small lick, and that's what finished me off, my eyes began to water up and I sniffed. Fluttershy used one her wings to make a small wall between me and Chilli so I could back off, I walked out the door and hung my head, I put my hands on my knees and took a deep breath. Fluttershy came to me and put a hoof on my shoulder.

"Callum, are you al-"

"I'm fine." I sighed quietly.

I stood up tall and coughed to clear my mind, I turned to face Bruce, who was waving.

"Good luck!" He called.

"Bye now!" Fluttershy called back.

Bruce shut the front door to stop Chilli getting out, he ran to the window in his lounge to watch us go.

"Come on, we're out in the open." I ordered.

Nodding, Fluttershy took to the skies and glided away towards the oak trees in the distance, where Rarity was patiently waiting on her lonesome. I jogged away from Bruce's to join them, only looking back once to give a small wave.

"Dear me, it's about time!" Rarity exclaimed.

"Sorry Rare, Fluttershy decided to be an adorable imbecile and dispel her invisibility while indoors, and thus I had to explain everything to Bruce." I teased, ruffling Fluttershy's mane.

"Good to go?"

Clapping my hands together and giving a small Pinkie-like bounce, I gave Rarity a firm nod.

"I'm as ready as I'll ever be, let's get this show on the road." I said, grinning.

As much as my separation from Chilli hurt me, I had to stay strong, especially around the six, I was their guide, and their protector, they would look to me in times of need and thus I felt like I needed to remain jolly and positive.
I would dwell on my emotions later, but now was not the time.

"Well, you perked up quickly." Rarity said with a questioning look.

"Chilli meant a lot to me, but she's in safe hands, and I now have you six, I have a purpose now." I replied.

She smiled as her horn began to light up.

"Try not to black out this time!"

I stuck my tongue out at her and blew a raspberry while she sent of a magical ping to Twilight; soon enough Twilight reciprocated and I felt the Pullie Portal's effect, my body started to turn a deep blue, with swirls of black mixed among the glow, and that was the last thing I saw, as everything flashed to white, and I found myself feeling completely weightless.

{Come on... Any second now...} I thought to myself as I stared into the never ending whiteness.

A matter of seconds later, I saw it, the black shape speeding towards me; although only the size of a golf ball at the moment, I knew it would only take a few more seconds for it to show it's true size and come crashing into me.
I stared at it as it got closer and closer, and with enough thought I could see a tiny opening in the centre. I ignored the deafening sound around me, and concentrated on getting through that hole.

{Come on... Come on!} I thought, and just as the mass flew into me, there was flash of white.

The white was gone just as quick as it had appeared, and I was suddenly met with the blurred colours of my garden, with gravity once again affecting me. If I were a cat, I would have landed flat on my feet perfectly; but I wasn't a cat, so I ended colliding with the floor with a loud smack.
The first thing I heard was Pinkie squealing loudly and running to my side with the other girls in tow.

"YOU'RE BAAAAACK! You got back so fast! I mean I knew you wouldn't take forever because you look like you're pretty fast but I didn't expect you to get back that fast. Oh and your landing was hilarious! You were all like 'whoa' and was all like 'wooooo'! And then you smacked into the ground! Priceless!" Pinkie yelled at the top of her lungs, zipping around like a lunatic.

"Yeah, nice landing, you might turn out to be a good rock one day." Twilight joked.

"Uuuugghhh... Yeah, yeah... Laugh it up..." I groaned wearily as I went to properly stand up.

As I got to my feet, a blunt pain shot through my back, and left shoulder.

"Why does it feel like I just fell from the roof of a house?" I grumbled, rolling my shoulder until it crunched.

It took Twilight a good few seconds to answer, she was just examining me from head to toe, I guess when I was on the floor she had forgotten how tall I was. She put her hoof behind her neck awkwardly and cleared her throat.

"Well, that certain spell has a troublesome tendency to skew slightly when it comes to the exact arrival target, only by a few metres most of the time. To compensate, I set your destination a few metres in the air to prevent any complications, such as you arriving with your legs underground for example. And seeing as you're new to teleportation, there's obviously going to be a delay before you regain control over your body, so I'm afraid you didn't exactly have any control of your landing, or crash, to call it honestly." She stated, smirking.

"At least you didn't entirely black out!" Rarity chuckled.

"Ugh, from henceforth, I hate portals." I remarked, giving my head a shake.

"Are you hurt?" Fluttershy asked.

"Nah, I'll be fine." I replied, shrugging it off.

Twilight's horn lit up and my rucksack launched itself into my chest, to which I caught with ease.

"Good, because we're moving out. We are heading northeast of here, I've detected a big surge of electrical energy there, which I can use to pinpoint the shards faster." She instructed.

"Ah, that would be Gatwick Airport."

"I don't care what it's called."

I rolled my eyes and put the rucksack on, before opening the back gate and allowing the mares to go first. Shutting the gate behind me and tightening my backpack straps, I took in my very first breath of freedom, from here onward, every step I took was another step into the unknown, and while I used to hate unknowns, this was a new me, and a new future.

I looked at my compass to check that we were heading northeast, and then began walking in that direction. The others trotted along with me, besides Pinkie Pie of course, whom bounced along in her usual fashion.

"Alright then everypony! Allons-y!" I yelled, breaking into a power-walk.

Finally, we were off, the quest had begun.

Chapter Twenty-Two: Back to the Beginning

Chapter Twenty Two - Homebound

“Are we there yet?” Pinkie asked.

“Pinkie, you’ve asked that like, eight times now.” Dash moaned back.

“This isn’t as fun as the first time…” She huffed as she slumped onto a pile of suitcases.

Flights back were never as fun as the outward flight, but at least we were safe now. Getting into the flight tower with Twilight and finding a plane to Gatwick was a lot easier than the first time, the airport security in Brazil wasn’t as uptight as England’s.

“It’s a seven hour flight, we’ve only been in the air for three hours, stop asking if we’re there yet, we’re not even halfway.” Twilight grumbled to Pinkie.

“Okie dokie lokie!” She squeaked and dived into a suitcase pile.

“Do you ever wonder what humans have in these things?” Dash asked Rarity, prodding a suitcase.

“Just personal belongings I expect, nothing different from what we’d bring on holiday.” She replied.

I looked around for something interesting to do, and spotted someone’s guitar case in the corner of the cargo hold.

“I want.” I chuckled childishly.

“You want what?” Fluttershy asked curiously, who was sitting at my side.

“That…” I playfully growled as I pointed at the case.

“What’s that?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Music!” I cried out, sounding like Will from Captive Corner.

“Want me to get it for you?” Rarity offered, her horn lighting up.

“Hang on!” Dash blurted out.

We all turned to face her.

“I dare Callum to jump out the pressure bubble and get it himself.” She grinned.

“Are you high? Or just incredibly stupid? That could kill him!” Rarity scolded.

“Challenge accepted!” I shouted, standing up.

“Quark! Retard alert! Retard alert!” Blu squawked.

The whole group burst into laughter at that, even Twilight couldn’t hold back a chuckle.

“I was born retarded, give me a break.” I laughed.

“Callum, don’t be an idiot.” Rarity pleaded.

“I’ve never failed a dare, and I never will.” I replied before turning towards the guitar case.

{You do realise, you can’t play guitar, right…?} A Scottish voice spoke inside my head.

It was the same voice that I heard when I grabbed the orb shard, I was confused to begin with, but just shrugged it off and assumed it was my conscience speaking to me.

{I can play a few tunes…} I thought back to him.

{You’re risking your life, to play a few tunes…?}

{EEYUP!}

{You’re an idiot…}

I ignored my conscience and took a deep breath, before stepping out of the pressure bubble.
The second my head had left the bubble, my ears started ringing, my lungs felt as though they were going to explode. I breathed out very slowly and stabilised the pressure in my ears by holding my nose and then trying to breathe out. I shook my head and moved as quickly as I could to the guitar case, I didn’t look down and tripped over a suitcase and rolled over the pile next to it before finally reaching the case.
I grabbed the case and made my way back, I slid the case into the bubble before jumping back in myself.

“Dude, you have balls... Like, big balls…” Dash chuckled.

I lay on my back and let the pressure return to normal before replying.

“I don’t have big balls, I’m not as brave as I act.” I huffed.

“After all we’ve been through already? Ingeo? Crocodiles? How are you not brave?” Rarity asked.

“Girls, what I do is not bravery, it’s stupidity, I do stupid stuff and hope for the best. I barely plan a thing, I never have, heck I didn’t revise for any of my exams at school, nor have I ever assessed a situation before acting.” I grinned.

After getting no reply, I finished off with one of my favourite quotes of all time, from the film Eragon.

“I’m one part brave… Three parts fool…”

“Sounds about right.” Dashie chuckled.

“Are you okay though?” Rarity asked, looking at me like a concerned parent.

I nodded and sat up, before reaching for the guitar case. I zipped the case open and saw an absolute beauty of an acoustic guitar. The body was glossed and painted black, but the wood grain could still be seen, it was in top quality. I ran a finger over the strings to find it was in perfect tune as well, as the sweet sound rippled out from the guitar a great big grin lit up the faces of everyone around me, including myself. Even on their own, the notes sweetly caressed our ears like honey to our tongues.

“So, can you actually play one of these things?” Dash asked.

“I can play a few tunes, but nothing with any chords.” I replied.

“Let’s hear them!” Fluttershy squeaked loudly.

Everyone turned to face her, and she instantly blushed a deep red and receded back into herself.

“I mean, um, could we hear you play? If, um, that’s okay with you…”

I raised an eyebrow.

“I really like music…” She whispered.

We continued to stare at her for a few seconds before shaking our heads and chuckling; I picked up the guitar properly and held it to my chest before taking another stroke of the strings.
After getting comfortable, I ran my fingers down the instrument’s neck and pressed on the thinner strings at one side of the guitar, before playing a very simple version of The Living Tombstone’s ‘Nightmare night’.

“Not, bad!” Dash praised.

I played the tune for about two minutes before stopping, I looked at the ponies to see them staring in awe. Not at me, but at my hands.

“Now I see how humans have come so far without magic…” Rarity spoke, her eyes fixated on my fingers.

“How so?” I asked.

“Your hands, they’re strong, yet delicate, they can create the most intricate of things…”

“Hehe, they’re alright I guess.” I giggled, wiggling my fingers to myself.

“Another! Another!” Pinkie squeaked.

I looked at the mare and chuckled, it seemed music was the way to the hearts of all the ponies. Beside their different personalities, the one thing they had most in common was their love for music.
I tightened my grip on my guitar and moved on to the lower notes, where I performed a little tune I had made myself that involved hitting the strings at the base of the neck while I play to create a drum beat, it was a more upbeat tune. Need I say, the ponies were all impressed, even Twilight turned her head to watch me play.

“Now that’s my kinda tune!” Applejack cheered.

“A little bit of funk! A little bit of funk!” Pinkie sang, standing on her hind legs and giving a pelvic thrust on each ‘funk’.

We all stared at her, shocked and horrified.

“What?” She asked innocently.

She literally had no clue that she had just done a very sexual dance.

“I’m gonna tell her.” I said dully.

“Don’t you dare!” Rarity scolded, prodding my arm.

They laughed and went over to settle Pinkie down.

“Someone’s gotta tell her…” I mumbled in disbelief.

A few tunes later, I moved to my last piece, and I had saved best until last.

“I’ve got one more for you all…” I spoke softly, closing my eyes and stroking the guitar neck.

“Is it funky?” Pinkie asked.

“No, it’s a more... Mellow, tune…” I fondly replied, giving Pinkie a warm smile.

The group all came closer into a huddle and waited with anticipation, by now Twilight had also joined the group and was waiting as well, just without such passion.
I took in a deep breath, tightened my grip on the instrument once more, before playing Space Oddity by David Bowie.

And then I began to sing…

“Ground control, to Major Tom… Ground control, to Major Tom…”

My eyes were closed when I started singing, but as I slowly opened them I saw the ponies staring at me intensely, their eyes round as dinner plates, and their pupils filling the majority of their eyes.
I smiled slightly and continued to sing…

“Take your protein pills, and put your helmet on… Ground Control to Major Tom…
Commencing countdown, engines on…”

As I hit the guitar solo I leant back and let my own passion for music take over as I combined my voice and the guitar to transform a song into an emotion.
“This is Ground Control, to Major Tom…! This is Ground Control, to Major Tom…!”

I sang my little heart out until I finished the song, and looked at the group shyly, to find Rarity was crying.

“Beautiful… That was absolutely… Beautiful, darling…” She sighed.

“I was not expecting that voice to come out of you…” Applejack admitted.

“Where did you learn to sing like that?” Fluttershy asked.

It was my turn to be shy, I shrugged and looked away as my blush began to show.

“I don’t know, I just taught myself over time…” I mumbled.

“Dude… Are you shy?” Rainbow Dash pointed out.

“Maybe…” I nervously giggled.

What the ponies had now learned is that I was extremely passionate about music, and was a very good singer. What they didn’t know, is that I was teased for singing at school by my jealous classmates.
At home, my family had no true passion for music and always shut me up when I sang.
There were very few friends I felt comfortable singing in front of, which were that of two girls, Annabel Knight and Jenny Hitt, along with three guys, Harry Courtney, Connor Peacock, and Aarin Zeto.
These people were once my closest friends, I hoped they didn’t miss me too much...

“Why?” Dash asked.

I shook my head and cleared my thoughts.

“What? Sorry I kinda zoned out there.” I giggled awkwardly.

“Why are you shy?”

“I just naturally get shy, I’m very nervous about singing.” I explained.

“Now that’s a side to you I didn’t foresee…” Rarity hummed.

I looked to Fluttershy to see she’d moved over so she was sitting right next to me. I couldn’t help but smile at her adorableness…

“I… I can relate to that…” She whispered.

My smile turned into a grin as I put my arm around her neck and put my hand on her shoulder.

“I noticed.” I teased.

She nervously giggled and blushed like a beetroot, which only caused me to grin even wider.

“Besties!” Pinkie sang merrily as she looked at us.

The both of us laughed for a bit before Twilight joined the group properly.

“What do you want purple?” Dash grumbled.

She ignored Rainbow Dash and sat next to Applejack, before looking at me.

“The music was… Well played…” She quietly spoke, looking at the floor.

I looked at her blankly for a moment.

{Fuck my arse and call me a princess… Was that a genuine apology!?} I thought to myself.

I looked her in the eyes and saw no anger or hatred, but neither did I see real sorrow or shame. I saw fear.
She didn’t hate me… She was simply afraid of me…

“Thank you.” I replied calmly.

I looked to Rarity to see her smiling warmly.

“Isn’t it nice when everyone gets along?” She joked.

“Nah! Violence is magic!” Dash shouted and jumped into Applejack.

“Oh you asked for it!” The farm pony growled playfully.

The two of them engaged into a wrestle and rolled around the cargo hold, attempting to pin the other down and force them to submit, the rest of us laughing all the while. I looked to Twilight to find her looking at her two friends wrestle, with the corners of her lips slightly upraised…

“Alright ladies! Let’s not have another repeat of last time, hold onto something!” I called.

It had been a few hours later and the plane was coming in to land, I had already latched onto a railing at the side of the hold with Rarity, Fluttershy, Twilight and Pinkie. Applejack jumped over a suitcase and reached us just before the turbulence started. Rainbow Dash however, was cocky and tried to fly around and battle it.
Every negative emotion in existence hit me like a train when her raw, featherless wings splayed out, she had completely forgotten...

“Shit!” She screamed as she lost her coordination and fell.

Her landing was alright, and was able to land on a soft suitcase, and then the plane landed. The entire cargo hold shook and Rainbow Dash was launched into a bigger pile of suitcase, which toppled over onto her, burying her alive.

“Dashie!” Pinkie squealed.

The aeroplane eventually came to a halt and we were able to let go of the railing. I rushed over to the suitcase pile and began pulling them away, until Rainbow’s mane was visible. I pulled away a big suitcase and was able to grab hold of her hoof, and dragged her out of the pile. I lay her on her side and she rolled onto her back, moaning. The whole group circled around her and looked down at her, me included.

“Are you okay?” I asked quietly.

She looked up at me, her eyes streaming with tears, her lips were trembling she was about to break down.

“Oh Dashie..." Applejack sighed.

Rainbow threw her head back and burst into a heart-breaking wail, she sobbed and sobbed; the poor girl couldn't handle this. I put my arms out and picked her up, giving her a tight hug. She buried her head into my chest and continued to wail uncontrollably.

"Company's coming." Twilight spoke.

From above us I heard movement, the passengers were getting off. I knelt down and was able to make eye contact with Rainbow Dash, her eyes were bloodshot and she was a complete mess.

"I know this is hard, but you've got to calm down for me okay? We're still in the plane, and need to escape. Do you understand?" I said softly.

She looked at me, sniffing, before giving a small nod and wiped her eyes.

"Atta girl." I whispered into her ear.

I gave her forehead a kiss and we all moved towards the cargo hold door and waited for our queue.
Soon enough, we heard the luggage carrier arrive and Twilight cast her invisibility spell, we glowed purple before disappearing completely.

“To save mana I’ve cast a weaker spell, it should last for about ten minutes.” Twilight told us.

“Right, so no fooling around girls, as soon as we get off the plane, we move quickly away from the airport.” I commanded.

Seconds later, the hatch opened and the conveyor belt protruded through the opening before lowering down to the floor of the cargo hold, a couple of men jumped down into the hold and started to put suitcases on the belt. We all moved silently towards the belt and crept past the men, one by one we hopped onto the belt and were able to exit the plane with no problems.
We jumped down off the other side and moved swiftly and silently towards the far end of the runway. Luckily the plane had landed nearby to the place we originally came from, I could even see the chain-link gate I had shoulder rammed open before, by the looks of things it had been repaired, I’d have to fix that.

“To the gate, go.” I ordered, turning to face the faint purple outlines of my friends.

Upon reaching the gate, I found the gate was brand new with shiny steel hinges; there was no shoulder ramming that could break that.

“It’s locked, and too strong to break.” I told the group when they caught up with me.

“How do we get out then?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Oh screw it.” Twilight grunted.

That’s when a laser beam shot from the outline of her head and hit the gate’s upper hinge, turning it red hot in mere seconds.

“So much for saving mana…” I mumbled.

The door dropped slightly, which was when I stepped forward and kicked it, snapping the padlock and causing the door to fall over, I smiled to myself and waltzed through.

“Do you know the way back?” Applejack asked as she followed me through the door frame.

“Nope, but I’m sure we’ll figure it out.” I replied.

She hummed and gave a small shrug, the others came through the door to join us, which was when we set off at a more relaxed pace. Twilight took point, while I walked alongside Rainbow Dash and occasionally ruffled her mane. Throughout the walk, I was able to cheer her up by talking to her about the Daring Do books.

We had walked for about an hour before we came to the River Mole, not far down the river I saw the tree I had climbed to cross the river, the branch must have snapped at some point during my time in Brazil, as it wasn’t there anymore.

“I’m not teleporting us across, I need to preserve the rest of my mana.” Twilight told us.

“How do we get across if we can’t use magic?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Can’t Rarity use magic?” I asked.

“I can’t teleport all of us, teleporting the two of us was bad enough, I had a migraine for hours on end after that.” Rarity answered.

I looked at the river, in all honesty, it wasn’t that wide, it was just out of a well-timed jump. It was very deep here though, which was a potential danger.

“What if you all spring off me?” I suggested.

“What?” Dash asked.

“Hear me out, if I were to get onto my knees and you all take a run-up, and jump from my shoulders, you’d easily get across that gap with a spring-loaded jump.” I explained.

“Darling, that’s a silly idea; you can’t possibly expect us to jump onto and use you like a trampoline!?” Rarity exclaimed.

“I’ll be fine, remember I was a heavyweight boxer, I'm literally built to take some strain, I can bench-press your weight without breaking a sweat.” I reminded her.

“That is true…” She hummed.

“How much can you bench press then?” Applejack asked teasingly, flexing her eyebrows at me.

“Sixty kilograms.” I replied.

“Hot dang…” She muttered, clearly impressed.

“I can leg-press two-hundred and forty though.” I added.

Dash and Applejack looked at me blankly.

“What?” Dash asked.

“You heard me, I can leg-press two-hundred and forty kilograms.” I repeated.

“You do realise, that’s around the weight of all six of us together?” Rarity quizzed.

I grinned.

“That’s crazy…” Applejack said, raising her eyebrows.

“How did you get them that strong?” Rarity asked curiously, prodding my legs.

“Just a lot of training,” I replied, “it’s a combination of going on daily runs, and my boxing, and for my school PE lessons I did weight training, which included lots of leg-work. Over the years they’ve just become really strong.” I explained.

“With legs like those, you could probably buck better than I do!” Applejack chuckled.

“hm, maybe… But keep in mind you have strong hooves, while I’ve got fleshy feet.” I pointed out.

Applejack hummed as she tilted her head, taking my point.

“If you all hadn’t noticed, we’re still not over this river.” Twilight said dully.

We all looked at the river, and then back to Twilight.

“Oh yeah!” I laughed.

I walked to the edge of the river and got onto my hands and knees.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Dash asked.

“Pisa-Positive!” I laughed back.

She shrugged and walked away to get a run-up, I gulped as she turned to face me and scratched the ground with her fore hoof.

{Maybe this, isn’t a good idea…} I thought to myself.

{You think?} My Scottish conscience scoffed.

It was too late to think about that now, for Dash had started sprinting towards me, she leapt into the air as she approached me and her hind hooves made contact with my back where she pushed off a second time and launched over the river with a good metre of clearance from the edge.

“Hah! It worked!” She cheered.

“Next!” I called.

One by one, the ponies all jumped across the river, using my back as a springboard, Fluttershy flew over of course, the only one left, was me.

“What about you?” Rarity asked.

“Ah, bollocks to this.” I grumbled and took a few steps back.

I gave a full sprint at the river, and jumped with all the strength my legs had, surely I'd make the jump... Right?

“So, how far away are we from your house?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Not too far now.” I grumbled, a face like thunder.

We had walked a couple of miles southwest, I walked ahead with all the ponies merrily in tow, Twilight walked by my side with a large smirk on her face.

“Laugh it up Purplesmart…” I spat.

Twilight attempted to stifle a chuckle and cleared her throat, I slowed down and let the others take over, I sped up to a normal pace when I came alongside Rarity, who levitated my shirt to me.

“I dried it as much as I could, but it’s still rather damp.” She said kindly.

She looked at me, saw my soaking wet hair, and looked away to hide her smile, I frowned before grinning myself, and shaking my head like a dog, showering her in drips of water; she squealed and ran away, to which I gave chase.

“No! Stop!”

“Get your pearly white rump back here! You need a shower!”

“No! I washed my mane this morning with a spell!”

“You missed a spot!”

“Nooooo!”

The two of us bolted past the rest of the group and made our way down a forest path, Rarity yelping and me growling playfully behind her. Eventually her stamina let her down and she came to a halt, turning to face me with a face of shock, I approached her and held my head forward, ready to shake my hair again.

“Don’t ruin my mane! I look so pretty!” She squeaked.

I burst into tears of laughter and doubled over, unable to control my laughing fit.

“It’s not funny! It took me a good half hour to perfect!” Rarity defended herself.

At this point I was already on the ground, wailing with laughter. The others walked past me and giggled, finding the scene rather amusing. I eventually picked myself up and caught up, we weren’t far from home.

“We made it..." I sighed.

We had reached my garden fence, we were finally home again.

“Would you like me to cast the portal?” Rarity asked.

“That would be appreciated.” Twilight replied.

The white unicorn charged up her horn and created a portal through the fence to the other side, to my old back garden. One by one, we stepped forward and went through. Just as I was about to pass, the portal closed.

“Really Rarity?” I moaned.

From the other side of the fence I heard Rarity giggle; I sighed and vaulted the fence like I had the first time and landed next to Pinkie, who blinked at me, and then blew a raspberry at me.

“What?” I asked, confused.

“Okie dokie lokie!” She replied merrily and trotted further into my garden.

“I… Wha… What?”

“Don’t even try dude, she’s completely broken.” Rainbow Dash told me, chuckling.

I shook my head and looked at my garden, it hadn’t changed a bit.
I smiled and reminisced in the memories of playing around with Archer and Chilli…
When Archer was just a pup and was the same size as Chilli, he’d try to keep up with her and chase her, but she was always too fast. Then he got bigger, and bigger, to the point where he stood up to my abdomen and could jump fix feet high. In the early mornings he was chase deer from the land, running up to speeds of forty miles an hour.
When Chilli and I used to hide at the end of the garden in a little den I had made, I used to cook pigeons and squirrels I’d shot with my air rifle on a campfire, she had even learned to be a gun-dog and would fetch the game after I’d shot it. The memories would never leave me for as long as I should live…

“Callum… You alright?” Applejack asked, prodding me.

I shook my head and came back to Earth.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” I replied, smiling.

I looked over to the house and a thought crossed my mind.

{What if we’re seen?}

“Right girls, keep in mind that my family might still be around, so we need to hide up at the end of the land, we won’t be found there.” I said to the group.

“You got it.” Dash replied and followed me.

I lead them up into the crowded oak orchard; there was a small garden path through the foliage that led to the old camp I made from branches and logs. When we arrived at the camp, I found it was all still intact.

“Neat camp! Did you build this?” Dashie asked me.

“Eeyup.” I replied merrily.

“That’s awesome…” She said, pointing her hoof at the wooden shelter.

“It could do with some-”

“Sprucing up… Yes, I know.” I interrupted Rarity’s criticism.

“We need to set up camp here, and then we need to find the next orb shard location.” Twilight announced.

I took out my phone and checked the time, it was midday, I also noticed my battery was on seven percent.

“It’s still early, if we find the location now you can set off today.” I told her.

“Trying to get rid of me as soon as you can?” She snorted.

“Yes.” I excitedly replied with a massive grin.

She looked at me, clearly unimpressed, but she then raised her eyebrows in merry thought.

“Well, seeing as I want to be away from you as soon as I can, it's a win, win situation.” She said with her chin upraised.

“Sounds good to me.” I replied, smiling.

With that, Twilight’s horn lit up.

“Open your phone app, I’m going to combine the enchantment and my spell together to find the shard more accurately.” She commanded.

I went to my apps and found ‘maps’.

“Ready?” I asked.

She nodded, and I tapped the app, it opened immediately and Twilight cast her spell on the phone, it began to vibrate violently to the point where it almost hurt my hand to hold it. The screen glowed a bright lavender purple and almost blinded me, I squinted at the screen to see the phone was glitching out in my hand, as if it were phasing in and out of reality.

“Brawk! Bright light! Bright light!” Blu squawked.

Eventually the light went out and the phone stopped buzzing, the screen went black and wouldn’t turn on.
After a moment, the phone started up again. I tapped the screen and received a small static shock, I flinched slightly and scrolled across to my maps app and selected it.
The app loaded and showed our location in England, somehow it still worked absolutely fine. The map zoomed out and scrolled across Europe, and kept on scrolling.

“Where’s it going?” Fluttershy asked.

I kept watching as the map went past France, and Germany; it looked like it was heading towards Russia.
It suddenly stopped and zoomed in to a country on Russia’s border, it continued zooming in until it stopped on a place I knew all too well.

“Where’s that?” Dash asked.

I gulped as I recognised the place I was looking at.

“Ukraine… A place called Chernobyl...”

“So let me get this straight… The next shard is in a radioactive nuclear wasteland!?” Twilight shouted.

“I’m afraid so…” I replied.

“You two better start liking one another.” Pinkie commanded.

We both looked at her.

“Why?” We both asked in sync.

“Because you wouldn’t want to… Fall-out…” She hissed.

I put my hands in the air.

“Nope. Nope. So much nope!” I ranted, storming off.

I walked away for a good five seconds before returning to Pinkie.

“Stop it!” I shouted angrily at her.

“But the fans love it…” She mumbled sadly.

“What fans!?” I screamed in confusion.

“Don’t fuel the fire Callum, just let it go.” Rarity advised.

“Let it goooo! Let it goooo! Can’t hold it back anym-”

I grabbed Pinkie’s muzzle and held her mouth shut.

“NO! Frozen is not, and will NEVER be a good movie!” I boomed.

Rarity burst into laughter and put a hoof around Pinkie and took her from me to end her confusing torture of knowing things about my world she really shouldn’t. It was then when Twilight took a few paces away from the group.

“I’ve set up a portal beacon just outside your poor attempt of a camp, I’m heading off now, expect a portal in a couple of days.” She told us.

“Hang on, what about the radioactivity?” I asked.

“I’ll use an anti-radiation spell on myself.” She replied smugly.

“What about when we arrive?” Rarity questioned, tilting her head.

“I’ll find somewhere radiation free, if I can’t find somewhere I’ll cast the spell on you all as you come through the portal.” She answered.

“Fair enough.” Rarity shrugged.

“Right, I’m off.” Twilight said, breathing out through her nose, evidently afraid.

I must admit, even for a bitch. Twilight’s self-confidence was absolutely outstanding.
Her horn lit up, and her body began to glow. She then began to levitate into the air and a loud whirring sound emitted from her. Her body grew lighter and lighter, before there was a loud crack and a flash of white light. When the light cleared, she was gone.

“Well, that was quicker than getting a stupid plane the whole way!” Rainbow Dash moaned.

“Yeah… This plan could have worked a lot better for the first shard…” I mumbled.

I scratched the back of my neck in embarrassment as my original idea led us to getting captured, me getting tortured, and Rainbow Dash losing the use of her wings.

“So, what do we do while we wait?” Applejack asked.

“Sit on our rumps and be bored… There’s not much else to do…” Dash grumbled.

“What’s got you down frowny-pants?” I poked Dash’s foreleg.

“I just think it sucks that Twilight gets to go ahead and we have to wait.” She complained.

I smirked and squatted down beside her.

“Well you’re always welcome to run across Europe and join her.” I teased.

“Piss off.” She spat, sticking her tongue out.

I returned the same gesture, and she responded by jumping on me and attempting to pin me down on the ground, I grinned as I was about to show Dashie how well a heavyweight boxer could wrestle.

“You sure you want to take me on!” I growled as Dash planted her chest onto mine.

“You’re all bark and no bite boy!” She spat back.

I took hold of her right foreleg and pulled it to her left, allowing me to roll her onto her side and attempt to get on top. I was stopped however, by her tucking in her legs and bucking me square in the chest, pushing me back.

“Remember how much I squat, and then buck me again, I dare you!” I hissed as I approached her again.

“She wins wrestles in a flash, it’s Rainbow Dash!” She shouted as she head-butted my arm off her body.

“The first, and last ever poetry, from the illiterate lesbian!” I taunted.

“OOOOHHHH!!!! OOOOOH!!!!! OOOHOHOHOOOO!!!!” Pinkie, Rarity, and Applejack all wailed.

“Oh you asked for it buddy…” Dash growled viciously.

She rolled over and flipped me onto my side, before she kept rolling and flattened my face with her back. She then jumped up and cannon-balled onto me, causing me to grunt in pain.

“Submit!” She ordered.

“Make me!”

She tried to body slam me again, but I grabbed her hips and pushed her off me before belly flopping onto her, causing her to grunt loudly. I put my hand on her head and pressed it down, forcing her face into the ground.

“I hear you ponies like dirt sandwiches!” I laughed.

Without warning a sharp pain hit my back, I jumped and looked back to see she’d whipped me with her tail. Just as I had turned she made her move and slid out from under me and latched onto my back, she then wrapped both her forelegs around my neck in an attempt to choke-hold me into submission.

“Submit!” She hissed.

“Watch out… I like to squash ‘em!” I shouted as I fell back.

I flattened Rainbow Dash into the soft dirt and lay there with a big smile on my face, I had completely winded her and she had nowhere to move. Checkmate.

“I… Submit…” She coughed after a good ten seconds.

I grinned and rolled off her, stood up, and lent a hand to her. She groaned in pain as she took my hand and steadily got to her hooves, followed by shaking off the dirt on her coat and mane.

“Uhm… Ca… Callum…” Rarity stuttered.

I looked at her, confused, to find she was looking at something behind me.

“What-up faggots!?”

I turned around, and saw something I’d rather not see, or rather… Someone…

My brother…