Normal Norman In Faterlot High
Day tub of lard in Faterlot High.
You are Norman, the thin guy. Being a pretty tall dude in the school came to your aid this time. It's all started three months ago when these two guys named the Flim Flam Brothers came to school with this new device that made burgers twice as fast as any other Mcdonalds for a lot cheaper. Principal Celestia- excuse me, -Cellulestia- instantly accepted them into the schools lunch menu. Before you knew it, kids were getting fat left and right. Everyone else became fat whales while your tall structure dispersed the weight so you get thinner easier. By the time you had a little bit of extra gut, the rest of the kids were bloated beyond repair. Instead of getting a beer gut like your dad, you started eating right, choosing from the vegan menu, exercising and what not. In the end, it turned up to be a very healthy habit. Not only were you thin, you also had a pretty tone figure.
Instead of getting admiration for your new tone figure, the kids started calling you other names than just 'racist'. Instead they moved to other insults like; "FRENCH FRY!" and "SKINNY BOY" to make you feel bad. It's fine by you, 'racist' never bothered you before, and you definitely won't get insulted by words that prove your dedication.
Today is another day of avoiding the Fat Flap Brothers’ heart attack menu at the lunch hall. You take your seat beside you only six thin friends. Your friends were all thin because they liked vegan food before the fatpocalypse happened. Except for Green, he just thought being fat was 'mainstream'. Unlike you they were only thin, they still weren’t tone and didn’t lead a very active lifestyle. You got all your friends with you trying to stave off the scent of the entire school’s collective grease stains, except for one....
Purple was one of the first to go, it was her first taste of meat, she was so nervous at first. You pushed her to try it, you'll regret that decision for the rest of your life. It only took one taste for her to become a walking vacuum. She started eating like there was no tomorrow, it was at that moment you knew this school was going to get into some deep shit. She grew like no other, she was the stepping stone for destruction, and the landmark for the end of the the schools thin days. Now all she does is hang out Flap Sentry.
The Aryan Beauty had a handy amount of perfume that she would use before you all sat down, she was always thoughtful in that way. You and the final survivors of the fat hell that infected this school became pretty close, hanging out with others only became a game of holding your nose shut and getting told to fatten up. At this point it was not an option to hang out with the big kids, they didn’t like you, and you don’t like them. After all it is how nature intended, the healthy people breed a healthier generation, and the fat people struggle to find their genitalia.
Everything so far is an average day, may-... OH GOD WHAT IS THAT SMELL?
“Hey guys, what’s up?” Asked Flap from behind you.
The mood of the table practically ‘died’ at that moment. People start shifting in their seats and looking the other way to avoid looking directly at his petrifying folds.
“Uh, we’ve been doing good, and you?” You say.
After the whole ‘exercise’ thing you’ve been going through, you’ve kinda become the alpha male of the group and are usually the one to handle tiny fat emergencies like this one. To your friends, you are a reminder of why they stay thin, your health is sort of infectious.
“I’ve been doing good Norman *gasp*. I stopped playing the guitar because my fingers are too fat, so I decided to play bass guitar instead.” He says while showing you his new, slightly longer, guitar case. “Wanna see it?” He asks while his chin slaps his chest.
“Sure, why not?”
Through heavy breaths, he pulls out his new guitar. It’s a Fender Jaguar Deluxe Bass with full chrome plates and a glossy wood coat. His parents weren’t exactly rich or anything, but they definitely would pay a hefty price to get him something other than a cheeseburger. You’ve been to his house before, once his parents saw your rock hard abs they couldn’t keep their eyes off of you. They gave you a look that showed just how much they wanted you to be their son. Once they got alone time with you they said that he gets anything they can give, they also said it’s probably the only thing keeping him from eating and sleeping all day.
After struggling with the zipper, Brad finally gets the guitar out and starts to play a little demo, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ce51V7wy0Ag.
“That was... something, Brad.”
“Thanks, man. I gotta go, the burger stand has a corndog special going on in half an hour, and I wanna be first in line.”
“Yeah, see you later.” The others repeat you as Flap walks away.
“Ugh, Norman? Could you please close the conversation sooner? I felt like his smell popped a blood vessel in my head!” Said Green.
“What? It’s not my job. If you don’t like the way I talk to him, you take the lead in a conversation for once.” Green sighs before going back to his meal. The lunch continues in silence as the occasional gasp and burp comes from the gam of whales behind you.
You and your friends finish your meals and leave to your next classes. The problem with classes are the fact that you come in last so you don’t get crushed by the horde of blubber that try to squeeze in the door. When in class it’s still a very unpleasant experience. Every lesson is just you trying not to vomit from the smell while the teacher gasps between breaths.
“And that class *weeze* is the Pythagorean theorem *gasp*. Now you can go home *hack*.” Said Ms.Cheerlee through labored breaths.
Just as the bell rings, the fat wave fills the door shut with the added body mass of a herd of bulls. A few students fall over and require the help other narwhals to get up.
Once you get into the hallway, you meet up with the rest of the thin brigade to chat it up. As it turns out, the prom is going on as planned despite the amount of whales in one room. It sounds like a nightmare waiting to happen, but it was sort of inevitable. You and your friends are getting paid a hefty amount for setting up, mainly because everyone is too fat to do anything. You accept the schools offer of money and help, you probably need the exercise.
As the days of fat hell go on, the prom eventually comes. You and your thin friends are all standing around the gym while the gam of whales bombard to the snack table. The Fat Flap Brothers are making a lot of money by fattening up the crowed again. Eventually they call up the princess.
“And the winner is... Twilight Sparkle!” Said principal Cellulestia.
Wow, Twi did it! Good for her! You and your friends feel quite proud for her, despite the fact that she is the biggest student in the school. Out of the crowd emerges a massive purple figure that takes slow waddles to the stage. Eventually she makes it to the stairs. She takes one step... then another... then another... *sigh* then another.... Eventually she makes her way to the stage and takes the mic from the principal. “*Huf* I haven’t ran like that in a while.” Crowd laughs it up at her comment as if it were funny.
“Seriously, thank you! I wouldn’t be here without the help of *wheeeeeeeze*...” You and your friends look at each other, wondering who she will thank. “My dog!” She says while pulling out a squashed pile of purple gore from her bag. Instead of freaking out she puts it back in her bag like nothing happened.
Just before she gets her crown, Sunset Cellulose shows up.
“You can’t beat me *wheeze*! That crown is mine!” She says while taking the crown out of the principals greasy fingers. The crowd gasps (more like wheezes) in aw. “Now the power is mine!” She says before she puts on the crown. She starts glowing an eerie black. All of the sudden, she turns into a demon. “What the fuck is going on!?” You say.
“You won’t stop the power of *huf huf huf*.... You know what, just give me the crown.” Says Purple.
She starts waddling over to XXL Satan, and starts reaching after her crown. They share a battle of grunts and wheezes while the try to ‘fight’. Eventually Purple knocks Super Sized Satan over.
“OW! OH, I CAN’T BREATHE I CAN’T BREATHE I CAN’T BREATHE!” Says Sunset as she cries on the floor. “That’s what you get for messing with the power of *huf* friendship!” Says Purple while looking over her crying form.
“Twilight Sparkle. For your act of physical prowess, and saving the school from Sunset Shimmer, we give you the Prom Princess Crown!” Shouted principal Cellulestia.
The other kids tried to shout in response, but they got winded, so instead they settle for clapping. Twilight -tries- to bow, but she’s so fat that she just pointed her head down. Once the principal put the crown on her head, the clapping started to pick up. If you can call it clapping, it was half hands, and the other half was their huge arms hitting each other with each swing.
After the crown is put on her head she begins her march to the stairs. Like last time, it’s like watching a snail race. Once she gets down, she starts walking to you. The smell is the first part of her that reaches you and your friend, it takes awhile for her to catch up. When she reaches you she tries to give you a hug, it’s sort of hard with her gut being in the way. You decide to meet her halfway, and reach your own arms out.
“Thank you so much for your help Norman! I wouldn’t have been able to be where I am without you!” Said the Purple Ogre. After she done hugging you, she tries to move on to the rest of the friends. She gets tired, and just settles for a ‘goodbye’.
“Goodbye everyone, I’ve got to *huf huf* get back to Equestria now! (Oh Celestia, I need a cheeseburger.)” Said Purple.
All of your friends look at each other thinking the same thing, “what the fuck is ‘Equestria?’”. Purple begins walking to the door, you follow. As the alpha male of the group, the others follow. She taking a long walk to a statue outside of the school. It takes a good thirty minutes for her to get there, but she makes it. Once she get to the statue, she walks to a part of it that has a mirror.
“Ok, here I go, I’ll miss you!” She’s almost in tears, but it smell more like bacon grease that’s running down her face. She dips her top half inside to mirror... then she gets stuck. “Oh I think I need help guys!” Instead of wondering what the fuck she’s doing, you decide to comply with her request. You take a good position behind her and start pushing her. Your friends see that you’re struggling to get her to move, so they all take position behind her.
You all heave as hard a you can, Purple starts farting from you pushing her. Eventually you get her in after holding your nose to prevent vomiting. Her gigantic folds had enough grease to act as lubricant to get her inside. You and your friends are dumbfounded, how the hell did she do that? How the hell did any of this happen? It’s nothing you want to lose sleep over, so you just go home instead.
As you and your friends walk back to your house, you take the time to think about what happened. Your friends are sleeping over to as a final goodbye before the summer starts. Sunset is probably still on the floor right now, maybe she got tired and fell asleep? But what about the Fat Flap Brothers? Do they move on to do better things? I’m pretty sure they’ll follow those fat kids wherever they go, they are the tide of money after all. I’m pretty sure those are questions for tomorrow.
