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          A Day in The Life of Anon in Equestria           
                    -by Flabbergasted-                     
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DP-100
It was a normal day for Anon. His soulless nonexistent eyes scanned the Ponies milling about town square.
"Hay Anon!" Shouted Pinkie Pie from across the square. She was buying some sort of flour mix so as to continue baking Cupcakes. Before Anon could blink Pinkie Pie had appeared a few centimeters in front of his face.
"Gah!" exclaimed Anon with a shocked expression "What have I told you about pulling that shit when my body isn't ready?!."
That's what he would have said if he had a mouth. Sadly that is not the case, so what actually happened was along the lines of.
Anon backs up...
Anon stares at Pinkie Pie...
Anon stares at Pinkie Pie...
Anon continues to stare at Pinkie Pie...
A few random Mares made the bad decision to look into Anon's nonexistent eyes. Lets just say the local Hospital had a high demand for replacement Ovaries that day. However, Pinkie Pie is immune to the Ovary bursting charm that Anon secretes, like a slug, like a fucking I don't know, something that secretes male charm... like Chuck Norris (http://whiteglossyundergroundboard.files.wordpress.com/2011/07/chuck_norris_2.jpg).
Pinkie Pie stared into Anons eyes with a sultry expression. "I know another way you can burst my Ovaries."
Anon looked into Pinkies Eyes with a blank expression of shock "O rly? (http://www.assetstorage.co.uk/AssetStorageService.svc/GetImageFriendly/721366775/493/600/0/0/1/80/ResizeBestFit/0/FRU/FC8EE820D869B8E616FBF61C98802F5B/o-rly.jpg)"
Pinkie Pie turned and trotted away. Swaying her curvaceous flank, continuing to stare into Anons Eyes.
"I was being serious. How else would I burst your Ovaries?"
After Pinkie Pie had left the square Anon had once again begun to contemplate his life.
"What the fuck am I doing with my life?! For god's sake I could have been an Astronaut but Nooooo I just had to go to Equestria. Land of the opportunity my ass."
Unbeknownst to Anon a mare was watching him from afar.
"What a hunk!" exclaimed Momma Mash (https://sphotos-b-ord.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/p480x480/968904_177318715781148_1589899992_n.jpg). I would just love to ride that piece of meat.
Next to Momma Mash was Button Mash, her son. "Mom? what the buck?!"
Momma Mash was brought from her stupor by her son. "Huh? what?"