Leaving Reality

A very frazzled maned Twilight stood in front of the mysterious blue box. She and her friends had been trying for the past hour to get the doors open, although it was mostly her doing the work. She had tried a number of spells, from lock-picking, to trying to force the doors open. None worked, and it was starting to grind on Twilight's nerves.

What's in here anyway? Whats so important that somepony would go through this much trouble to lock it? She wondered.

Noticing her friends distress, Pinkie decided she would try her hoof at opening the doors.

"Tell us your secrets!" She shouted, pointing a hoof at the box, to which it gave no response.

Examining the creatures pocket contents did not yield much information either. The contents were fairly normal, a watch, a pair of glasses, and a knife. The objects held no sorts of enchantment on them, the only odd object was a small blue rectangular block with a black face. The black face seemed to have some sort of glassy quality to it, but Twilight or any of the other mares could figure it out. They had been set aside a while ago on the ground.

Twilight dragged her hoof across her face as Pinkie continued her interrogation of the box. Her horn glowed as she prepped yet another spell to try and open the doors.

"Twilight?" Applejack asked.

"Hmm?" Twilight said, eyes closed in concentration.

"Should we really be doing this?" Applejack asked, a slightly worried look on her face. Twilight stopped the spell and turned to face her friend.

"What do you mean?"

"Ah don't know whats in that there box, but whatever it is, somepony went to a lot of trouble to make sure it ain't opened."

"You think there might be something dangerous inside?"

"I can't say fer sure, but I don't know if we should be takin' any chances." The farm mare replied. Twilight thought for a moment.

"You're right Applejack, let's wait until the creature wakes up." Applejack nodded her approval.

"Ah'm gonna go get us some apple juice." With that Applejack walked off towards her home. Twilight collapsed on the ground, exhausted from trying so many various spells to open the doors. She looked towards her friends.

Rarity was doing a closer examination of the fob watch, Fluttershy was petting Winona, and Pinkie...was still 'interrogating' the box.

I wonder if it's woken up yet? She thought as she closed her eyes.

"And where do you think you're going?" The voice said. I was frozen where I stood. A voice. An actual, intelligent voice. A voice hasn't spoken to me since I left Earth.. and if there is one intelligent being here, then there are probably more. I smiled like I haven't smiled in a while, I could actually talk to someone besides myself. Crap, wait, alien, how the hell do I greet it? Or is it alien? Maybe this is an alternate Earth? Do I smile? Well I'm already smiling, well I can't really stop smiling, I mean this is just so damn exciting! Screw it, just turn around.

I spun around with a smile on my face, which quickly vanished when I found nothing but hay and apple barrels in front of me. That's..not good. Either I'm hallucinating or there are now talking hay and apples. I'm not really sure which is better at this point. I started scanning around the room looking for the source of the voice, and really hoping I'm not in the land of talking apples.

I noticed there was a second level to the barn, presumably filled with probably more hay and apples. And there was something else, a blue..were those rainbows? It was had some blue and rainbow..and...eyes.

"What?" That was all I said. Its eyes widened somewhat, like it was surprised that I could speak. Or maybe surprised I could speak the same language as her. Her? How do I know its a her? It actually looks a lot like a pony, like a little pony...

"OH!" I shouted, pointing a finger to Rainbow Dash. That was Rainbow Dash! From My Little Pony!

I started remembering a lot of things about good 'ol Friendship is Magic. I don't think the blow to the back of my head made me forget, I think I just forgot over the course of whenever I left Earth.

Damn it! Stop wondering about why for some reason you forgot about a TV show from Earth, and focus on the fact that Rainbow Dash is in front of you! I swear my grin got wider, it was beginning to hurt.

"Hello!" I said cheerfully. Rainbow Dash narrowed her eyes at me in suspicion. I don't think my smile is giving off the 'oh look he's nice and friendly' feeling. I think it's more 'oh god why does he have a knife'. I toned down my smile a bit, Rainbow Dash was still scowling at me.

"Um, hello?" I tried again, waving a hand towards her. Her face did not change at all.

"Well, if you're not going to talk I suppose I'll just be going.." No I won't, but I'm fairly sure she'll call my bluff. I spun on my heel and headed for the door.

"Hold it!" She said in her tomboyish voice. I didn't turn around, but my grin returned, not quite as wide and creepy I hope. I heard a fluttering of what I assumed to be wings, and a soft landing from the pegasus.

"Alright buddy, keep your hooves where I can see them and don't try anything funny." Rainbow Dash said in almost a growl. That wiped my smile off my face, I don't take kindly to being put under suspicion when I've done nothing. Well, mostly nothing, if this is Equestria, then I was probably stealing Applejack's apples.

I stuffed my hands into my pockets. "First off, they're hands, and second, I don't think it really matters considering you took everything from my pockets." Well, not entirely true, still have the key. Wow, my first conversation in who knows how long and I decide to be snarky, and with a being that is something of a celebrity back home no less. I mentally slapped myself, I should at least try to be civil.

Rainbow Dash didn't respond for a while, probably mulling over what I said. Maybe she was surprised? I wonder if there are any other humans here. Or maybe Doctor Whooves is here? That would be an awkward encounter, considering I copied his TARDIS exterior and control room...

"Are you a spy?" Oh god, I couldn't help it, I just outright giggled at that.

"Whats so funny?" I went from giggling to full blown laughing

"Stop it!" I doubled over onto the ground, holding my sides while laughing. My eyes were even starting to water from the laughing. Rainbow Dash remained silent during my laughing.

I finally got up after about a minute. I stood and ran my hand through my hair.

"Okay, I'm normal now. Well, relatively speaking heh." I had toned down my smile some, so as to not seem too creepy. That may be a lot cause at this point though...

Rainbow Dash was standing with her mouth open and her head cocked to the side, giving me a look that I interpreted as 'dafuq?'. That lasted for only a few seconds before she shook her head.

"Look, I don't know what you are, but I'm going to go get my friends and tell them you woke up." I nodded my head.

"Sure, go right ahead." I said with a mad grin.

"O..kay?" She said it like she was surprised I was just going to let her go. Maybe she was expecting me to be angry? Or is she expecting me to set up some sort of trap?

Rainbow Dash walked towards the barn door and pulled it open enough herself out, leaving me inside the lantern lit barn.

The five friends were sitting by the box, sipping on the refreshments Applejack had given them. They talked about anything, anything that is except for the box. Twilight got frustrated just at the thought of trying to open the doors.

They turned their heads at the sound of Rainbow Dash approaching for a landing.

"Hey Rainbow, is it awake?" Twilight asked, standing up from the ground.

"Yeah..it's awake." Rainbow Dash replied, having a distant look on her face.

"Rainbow Dash, are you alright?" Twilight asked.

"Yeah, it's just, I don't know, that thing is just weird." She said. The conversation reminded her of how her first encounter with Pinkie went. Granted it wasn't as random, but it was odd to say the least.

"Can it talk?"

"Yeah it can talk, it was smiling a lot too."

"Really!?" Pinkie exclaimed. Her fear was quieted a little when she found out it smiled, thinking that anything that smiles can't be all bad.

"Yeah, lets go see it, I don't want it trying to run away." I've already missed my nap, I don't want to take extra time to track down some monkey thing She thought.

The six friends trotted along the path to Applejack's barn, Winona accompanying them. Soon Winona stopped walking and stood still, sniffing the air. Seeming to have caught a scent of something, she broke off into a run towards the barn, barking along the way.

"Winona!" Applejack called out, giving chase to her dog. The rest of her friends followed in pursuit.

Welp, no point in me waiting around in a barn. As interesting as apples and hay are, I think I'm going to go back outside and enjoy the sunshine.

I pulled the barn door open, pleased to find that the sun was still shining. I leaned back against the door and sat down with my legs crossed. It'll probably help me seem less intimidating since I'm a bit taller than these ponies.

I closed my eyes and allowed myself to soak up the sun. Apparently I'm all smiles again, though not quite as much as when I just encountered Rainbow freaking Dash.

I've already had my mental breakdown about being in Equestria haven't I? Or does the laughing fit not count?

My thoughts on whether or not I had had my necessary freak-out over being in Equestria were interrupted by the sound of hooves and something that sounded closer to someone running barefoot than a pony running, as well as barking.

Barking? I opened my eyes and turned my head towards the source of the sound.

I saw a dog, running at me and barking. I couldn't tell what kind of dog it was, it had a brown coat with a white streak running down its chest and its muzzle, as well as a red collar adorning its neck.

The dog ran up to me, still barking. I remained in my seated position, standing up quickly might cause it to become scared and bite me. When it was about a foot away, it stopped barking and looked at me head cocked to the side.

"Hello." I said, smiling. I probably shouldn't be smiling, it could take it as a sign of hostility since I'm showing my teeth. Well, that's how it is for Earth dogs, maybe it's different here?

The dog blinked in response, as if surprised that I spoke. Wasn't this Applejack's dog or something? Argh, some stuff about the show is a bit fuzzy in my memory.

I reached out a hand towards the dog, it recoiled slightly at it. Then it went and sniffed my hand some, I smiled a bit more as the dog's breath tickled my hand. It stopped sniffing after a few seconds and stood still, I began to pet the dogs head. She stepped closer to me and pressed her head against my head. Well, I'm fairly sure it's a she, I think that's what is was in the show.

"Whats your name?" I asked the dog. Hey, multiverse, maybe she could talk? I stopped scratching her head and took a look at the tag hanging from her collar. 'Winona' The tag read.

"Winona, right." I said, I resumed petting Winona, scratching behind her ears. She laid her head down on my leg and let me pet her. Heh, I always was a dog person.

"You wouldn't happen to know a pony named Applejack would you?" I asked Winona. Okay, maybe she can't talk, but understand what I'm saying? I think she at least understood 'Applejack' because she lifted her head and looked at me when I said her owners name.

"Right, I think shes a bit angry at me, don't suppose you could put in a good word for me could you?" I asked Winona, touching the spot on the back of my head where I had been hit. She just continued to stare at me. I sighed and went back to petting her, and she rested her head on my leg again. Okay, maybe she couldn't understand me completely. Or Winona just really likes being scratched behind the ears.

I continued petting Winona for some time, not really thinking about much, just relaxing. I think this would qualify for another laughter break down, but I'm tired from the last one. God I'm lazy. Anyway, after some time petting Winona, I got that feeling of being watched.

I turned my head to the right to see six ponies staring at me. Ah, those would be the hooves I heard. Even Rainbow Dash, who I had not seen leave the air the entire time I saw her, was grounded. I gave the same response when I first saw Rainbow Dash.

"Oh." But I said it in a much calmer tone than last time. I don't know, I think petting Winona helped me calm down greatly. As for Winona, she was tuning into her inner honey badger and not really caring much for what was going on around her.

Twilight was the one to break the silence. "What are you?" Fair question I suppose.

"An apple thief apparently. Sorry about that Applejack." I said, looking towards Applejack. Not sure if calm or lazy, probably the latter. Her eyes widened some when I said her name.

Twilight opened her mouth, but I cut her off before she could say anything.

"Yes, I know that's not the answer you were looking for. I'm a human." Twilight was silent for a moment, looking at me in thought. Finally she put on a smile and held out a hoof to me.

"I'm Twilight Sparkle." I took her hoof and shook it up and down gently. Her hoof felt weird, I mean it was fuzzy of course, but also somewhat rubbery. Definitely not like the hooves on Earth. Twilight was smiling with a giddy expression on her face, probably brimming with questions. Applejack stepped forward, either to apologize or tell me off for trying to steal her apples, when a pink blur zipped in front of me.

"Hi my names Pinkie Pie and I've never seen anything like you before do you have any human friends do you like parties and cupcakes I love parties and cupcakes but you could tell that from my cutie mark, wait do you have a cutie mark? Why are you wearing clothes, do humans have any funny words 'cause ponies have some pretty funny words like pickle barrel and kumquat do humans have those words-" I clamped my hand over her mouth before she could say any more. I took a deep breath.

"Hi Pinkie Pie my name's Lewis and I've never seen anything like you either, well we have ponies but they're not as colorful. And no I don't have a lot of friends actually now that I think about it I don't have any friends really. I haven't had a party or cupcakes in a while but it sounds like a lot of fun, no cutie mark, and clothes because I don't have fur so I get colder easier." I replied at a speed that was close to how Pinkie Pie had been talking. Pinkie was staring at me, I looked behind her and the rest of the ponies were staring at me with their mouths agape. I removed my hand from Pinkie's muzzle.

Pinkie stared at me for a while. I know Fluttershy is famous for her stare, but damn Pinkie can pull one off. It wasn't threatening, it was like she was looking inside me, trying to figure out what I'm like I suppose.

"You don't have any friends?" I ran my hand through my hair, of course that's what she would take away from my long winded speech. I was hoping she would notice I didn't give her any funny human words.

"Well..no." Not exactly a whole lot of people to met in space. That and I burned most of my bridges with Earth. Most.

"Why not?" Pinkie said, cocking her head to the side. The look on the other ponies faces showed they were curious as well.

"There aren't exactly a whole lot of other humans for me to meet where I live."

"What, you live under a rock or something?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"Not exactly, its a bit difficult to explain." I doubt I can just say 'I live alone inside a box in space'.

"Well, you have a friend now Mr. Human!" Pinkie said. I smiled softly at Pinkie.

"Thanks.." I said, much more quietly than I had been speaking previously. Friends, haven't had those in a while.

We were all silent for a moment, the six ponies staring at me. I felt a bit uncomfortable with all the attention on me, so I went back to petting Winona.

"So aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" I said, finally breaking the silence. Twilight perked up.

"Oh right, sorry." She said with a sheepish smile. FFFF, my lack of watching ponies has left me incredibly susceptible to their D'awws.

"Girls, why don't you introduce yourself." She said. The first to step forward was Applejack, I think she was going to introduce herself before Pinkie started her hyper rant.

"Howdy there, my name's Applejack." She said, smiling and holding out a hoof. I took it the same way I didn't Twilight's, except Applejack damn near ripped my arm out of its socket. After we broke the handshake, Applejack didn't step back. Instead she started looking at her hooves like they were the most interesting things in the universe.

"Look, I'm sorry that I attacked ya. Ya didn't know they were my apples." She said looking at the ground, apologizing must be difficult for her.

"Applejack." I said, causing her to look at me. "I'm not angry at you, you were only protecting yourself and your land, honestly I'm impressed at your bravery. You attacked a creature that was taller than you and was armed, that takes some serious guts." Applejack was smiling brightly after I accepted her apology. The next to approach me was Rainbow Dash, she flew up towards me.

"I'm Rainbow Dash, fastest flyer in Equestria!" She said, holding a hoof to her chest. I chuckled at her boasting.

"Pleased to meet you." I said. Rainbow Dash got a questioning look on her face.

"Hey what was with the..you know." Oh right, my laughter break down thingy.

"Oh, umm, I think I just freaked out a bit from finding a new sapient species." Rainbow Dash looked confused at the word sapient, then a look of understanding dawned on her face.

"Oh, so you were pretty blown away by my awesomeness." Rainbow Dash said like it was the most logical explanation for it.

"What? N- Yeah sure." Might as well just let her have her moment.

"Sweet." Rainbow Dash said, hoof pumping in the air. I chuckled at her display.

"Alright Rainbow Dash, calm down." Rarity said in her posh voice. She turned her attention to me.

"Hello dear, my name is Rarity, Ponyville's local tailor."

"It's a pleasure to meet you." I said, best keep up my manners. She eyed the brown jacket I was wearing.

"Tell me, is that considered fashionable in the human world? It seems a bit..."

"Hideously generic?" I finished. Rarity nodded immediately.

"Yes! I mean, I just don't understand why anypony would wear such a thing." She then realized how that sounded. "No offense.." She added.

"None taken, I try my best to go unnoticed by most humans." I replied. Rarity got a surprised look on her face.

"Why in Equestria would you do that?" She asked. I sighed.

"Again, it's a bit complicated." I wore clothing that wouldn't stand out on Earth in most any time period so as not to draw attention to myself, being a time traveler and all. Can't have someone notice I've been in two different places one hundred years apart from each other.

Rarity nodded and seemed to accept that answer, for now at least. I turned my head to Pinkie Pie, who was wearing a giddy smile.

"Well Pinkie, I've already met you."

"Yep, and you never told me a funny human word!" Pinkie said.

"Alright, give me a sec." I rubbed my chin trying to think of a word. I snapped my fingers when I thought of a perfect one.

"Alright Pinkie here's a funny human word." She leaned in closer to hear it better, even the rest of the ponies looked curious as to what this word was.

"It's...Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious."

"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious?"

"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious." I said, smiling. Pinkie smiled in return.

"Your'e right, that is a funny word! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!" Oh god what have I done.

"Alright Pinkie, calm down for now, I still need to meet one more pony." Thankfully Pinkie nodded her head and made a zipping motion with her lips. I looked towards the yellow pegasus that was the furthest from me, hiding behind her mane.

"Hello." I said. I wonder if she saw the little conversation I had with Winona, who by the way was still sitting on my lap enjoying being scratched behind her ears.

"I'm Flut..." That was all I heard, but oh god the amounts of D'aw. Good thing I already know her name.

"Nice to meet you Fluttershy." She almost immediately came out from behind her mane.

"You heard me?"

"Of course" Fluttershy smiled, probably because she didn't have to go through the five minute process of someone trying to hear her name. Oh of course, I can remember that, but I can't remember the name of Applejack's dog.

"Well, now that we have introductions out of the way, do any of you know what happened to my box?" I'm curious as to whether they managed to get it open. It's supposed to only be able to be opened by my key, but magic...

"Oh, it's just over there." Twilight said pointing a hoof down the path where I could see the large blue box, further down the path I could what was probably Applejack's house.

"Were you able to open the doors?"

"No! What have you got in there that is so important that the doors are impossible to open!" Twilight snapped. Okay, I guess she's been trying to get them open for a while now. Actually her mane did look a bit messy. She realized what she just did and looked towards the ground.

"Sorry.." She said in an ashamed tone.

"It's alright." I wonder if these ponies know I'll probably let them get away with anything if they hit me with the puppy dog eyes.

"So what have you got in there?" Twilight asked in a normal tone. I mulled that over a bit, how do I explain this one to them? I decided on a simple answer.

"Oh you know, stuff." Yeah you know, a costume mask, some socks, time machine. Ya know, just the stuff you normally find in boxes.

"Well how'd ya get it in ta my orchard?" Applejack asked, sounding more curious than angry.

"With extreme amounts of difficulty." Besides, its not like I was planning on the Applejack's orchard, or this universe for that matter. Applejack seemed to get the hint that I wasn't going to tell her just how I got it there. I pushed Winona off my leg, much to her displeasure. I could tell because the dog was actually frowning at me. That was a new feeling, being frowned at by a dog. I think it was a bit weirder than whenever the ponies showed emotions because Winona just looked like a regular dog, so I guess I was surprised on some level to see her do something like frown. That and I don't think she got a whole lot of screen time.

I stood up and began stretching my legs, they had begun to fall asleep from Winona laying on them. As I was working out various kinks in my body I could feel the eyes of the ponies on me, I didn't really care though.

I looked down onto the ponies. "So, lets go see the box shall we?" I said, flashing them a toothy grin. Not waiting for an answer I began strolling towards the box, I eventually heard the sound of hooves following me, as well as Pinkie bouncing along. We walked in silence, and I could still feel the eyes of the ponies on me. Can't really blame them I suppose.

We reached my TARDIS soon, I noticed that my cutlass and other pocket contents were scattered before the box.

"Oh, that's where those were." I said to no one in particular. I put everything except my phone in its proper place. The phone was an iPhone I had painted TARDIS blue, as well as made some modifications to its performance abilities. I figured the phone could be a stepping stone in the explanation of my machine. Granted, pretty big leap from phone to TARDIS, but still better than nothing. I put a hand against the side of the police box, I haven't actually seen the outside for a while.

I turned around to face the six ponies.

"So how do you open it?" Twilight asked. I smiled and brought the key out of my pocket. Twilight's mouth opened a bit in surprise

"That's it? A key?"

"That's it." Twilight rolled her eyes and grumbled something I couldn't understand. I turned back around to the TARDIS.

"Hold on, just let me put my sword up." I could hear a collective sigh of relief from behind me. I opened a single door and stepped in halfway, just enough to place my cutlass back inside the umbrella holder. I noticed my second jacket hanging from the coat rack, identical to the one I was wearing. I checked the pockets and found a familiar paper bag.

I smiled to myself, this very well may be the only chance I get to do this, I only had ten of these things left. Good thing they were artificial, otherwise I suppose it would be cannibalization.

I stepped back outside and locked the doors, I saw Twilight eyeing the white paper bag inside my hand.

"Twilight." I said, holding out the bag towards her. "Would you like a jelly baby?"