Guitar Zero

by metroid_freak

Rating: everyone
Tags: Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy, Random
Length: 3603

Spike and the Mane Six rock the house in a no-holds barred Guitar Hero contest!

Don't you just hate it when you get something new and everyone wants to play with it at the exact same time? When Spike gets his claws on the latest Guitar Hero game, he finds his path to gaming freedom blocked by none other than the Mane Six. Will he overcome such a challenge and earn the right to melt his brain for a week?

Since I am unable to include lyrics, I highly, highly, HIGHLY recommend listening to the songs provided via hyperlinks throughout the story as they will greatly aid in providing some much-needed context. Now edited to improve readability.

Published 2013-08-12 04:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-08-12 04:10:02 UTC

Six mares. One Xbox. Too bad.

Six mares. One Xbox. Too bad.

“It’s here!” Spike exclaimed as he burst through the library door, carrying a game case and plastic guitar and panting from his round trip to the post office. “It’s here, it’s here, it’s he…” He paused and sighed as another fit of laughter erupted from the familiar gaggle of mares enjoying their little afternoon get-together…right in front of his beloved TV and of course, his coveted Xbox 360. Spike groaned inwardly; it was bad enough that Twilight barely allowed him any playing time in the first place but now, on his first day off in what seemed like weeks, there it was, blocked off by a near-impenetrable female force field.

No way, Spike thought, shaking his head determinately. Not this time…

“Ahem…” he cleared his throat, hoping to somehow get their attention.

Not a chance in Tartarus. Those girls were neck-deep in gossip and giggling, making any traditional attempt to grab their attention an exercise in futility. There was simply no choice in the matter. He took a deep breath…

“TWILIGHT!”

There was another pause as six mares looked at him in surprise, mostly due to the fact that they were largely unaware of his true vocal capabilities. After all, Spike was generally a fairly mild-mannered and even-tempered dragon, even for one so young. As such, instances in which he raised his voice were few and far-between, thereby ensuring that if he did ever feel the need to turn it up to 11, no one would or could ignore him. He grinned inwardly as they focused on him, wide-eyed with anticipation.

“What is it, Spike?” Twilight asked with a hint of worry in her tone.

“Look, I hate to interrupt you girls but I just got the new Guitar Hero: Rock ‘til you Drop Triple Pack and I can’t tell you how much I’m dying to play it. What I’m asking is, could you girls maybe move to Twilight’s room or something?”

“Whoa! You got the new Triple Pack?” Rainbow practically demanded with excitement, relieving the young dragon of his prize with a few lightning-fast flaps of her wings. Her eyes widened in delight as she studied the song list on the back of the oversized game case. “I love this game! Rocking out is like, the coolest thing ever!” With that, she began a highly improvised air guitar solo, strumming wildly and thrashing her head about like a crazy pony.

“Yes, I know that, which is exactly why I wanna play right now so if you wouldn’t mind…”

“Hay, Ah heard ‘bout this game!” Applejack suddenly interjected, grabbing the case from a distracted Rainbow Dash as she continued her ersatz concert performance, completely oblivious to the world around her. “Apple Bloom said sumthin’ ‘bout “Cutie Mark Crusader Rock Goddesses” but they had ta stop on account ‘o they had no instruments…or any musical talent for that matter. Well, ‘cept fer Sweetie Belle but she wanted tuh play bass. Ah’d sure like ta try it out an’ see what all the hullaballoo was all ‘bout.”

Wait; what’s going on right now?

“Oh, is this the one with that one song…what was it called?” Rarity mused thoughtfully. “Oh yes! The one by that dreamy Bon Colti? Oooh, every time I hear Living on a Prayer, I just die! Spike, darling, I simply must give it a try as well!”

Et tu, Rarity, my beloved?

“Ooh, this game is one of my absolute favorites!” Pinkie Pie added cheerfully, snatching the case from Rarity, who in turn had retrieved it from Applejack. “Dashie’s right! Rocking out is like, the coolest thing ever!” With that, she joined her friend’s pseudo-concert and the solo act soon became a duet.

Something’s not right…

“As much as I don’t approve of video games, I do love music and I suppose a little bit can’t hurt,” Twilight mused as the rock fervor began to catch up to her. “Count me in!” Spike did a double-take.

Is this real life?

“I, um, that is...I also wouldn’t mind giving it a try as well...if you don’t mind, of course...” Barely audible above Rainbow and Pinkie’s antics, Fluttershy’s interest made it unanimous; all six mares wanted to play just as much as he did. Spike sighed for what seemed like the umpteenth time as his mind began to formulate a plan. Twilight noticed and offered a small, albeit sheepish, smile.

“I’m sorry, Spike. I know how excited you were to play it. It’s just that we don’t get to just sit and gossip very often. Besides, don’t you think you’ve played enough video games this week?”

“It’s okay, Twi.” Behind the innocent smile that accompanied Spike’s words of forgiveness, however, a devious plan began to take root, a plan that promised him more than enough time for the Xbox to liquefy his brain. “But...if you’re all still interested in playing, I have an idea.”

“Heck yeah!” Rainbow exclaimed, having finished her duet with Pinkie Pie.

“Rainbow, you don’t even know what the deal is yet!” Twilight reminded her.

“I don’t care! I just wanna rock my face off!”

“Me too!” Pinkie squealed.

“Darn tootin’!”

“Yes, myself as well.”

“Um...I guess I could...” Twilight sighed upon hearing her friends’ enthusiastic responses.

“Okay, Spike, what’s the plan?” He grinned.

“A Guitar Hero contest; me as my own team versus all of you as the other team. We’ll each play a song of our choice on the hardest difficulty we think we can handle, and whoever from either team gets the highest score, that team wins.” Spike replied confidently. “If you win, you girls can play as much as you want while I clean up the entire library. If I win, then I get to play as much as I want for the next week and you all have to do my chores. Um, except Rarity, of course,” he added sheepishly as the unicorn batted her eyelashes at him.

“Okay Spike, you’re on! I have to say, I think I’m going to enjoy this! I could use a study break.” Twilight exclaimed as a grinning Spike opened the case and put the game in.

“Ooh, I wanna play as her!”

“Rainbow, let go of the controller! Wait for your turn!”

“Spikey-Wikey, may I change her outfit first? Leather is so last year.”

“MAKE HER HAIR PINKER!”

“Fine! Everypony can make their own character,” Spike capitulated and simply tossed the controller towards the group. After several frenetic minutes, six new rocker ponies stood out amongst the others in the game’s character selection menu, each one more ridiculous than the last. With that, the contest began.

“I wanna go first!” Rainbow insisted, snatching up the plastic guitar. “Hmm...” she mused whilst scrolling down the list. “I know! I wanna play this one!” She selected it and set the difficulty to ‘Hard’.

The song began as a steady stream of notes in rapid succession, interrupted occasionally by alternating one and three-note guitar riffs. Having played the game before, Rainbow strummed along with justified self-assurance, making very few mistakes. While initially surprised by Rainbow’s choice, the gang soon realized why she had picked it.

There was a strange energy in the room as Rainbow played, something electrifying the air around them. It was as if the song and its player were in near-perfect synch, giving off an aura of power and confidence. There was no doubt that the song and the pony were made for each other.

As the song went on, Dash seemed to immerse herself further and further into the experience. First it was the 50-note streak, then the 100, then the 200 and it seemed as if Rainbow was poised to win the contest single-hoofed.

It was all Rainbow Dash could do not to belt out the last few lines in a singing voice best reserved for those special, TV-esque moments that seemed to occasionally pop up from out of the blue. As she finished the song, the rest of the gang, even Spike, offered their applause and praise.

“Ha! Four stars! That’s what I’m talkin’ about!” Rainbow exclaimed, accepting a hoof-bump from Pinkie. “75,340 points! Beat that!”

“Wow, nice going!” Twilight complimented. “Who wants to go next?”

“Ah reckon its mah turn ta get this hoedown goin’!” Applejack replied, accepting the controller from Rainbow Dash. “Ah’ll play this one! It’s an oldie but a goodie.”

Applejack's choice was hardly a surprise to anypony. The fact that such a song existed on a primarily rock music-based game seemed to suggest that such a contest was destined to occur. It did little to alleviate Spike’s growing nervousness, especially since Applejack seemed to be doing rather well for her first time, and on ‘Medium’ difficulty to boot.

Despite the relatively small buttons on the controller and Applejack’s farmer-sized hooves, she played with a kind of finesse that Spike attributed to her immense enjoyment of the song. Unlike Rainbow Dash, she had no inhibitions about singing the last few lines and did so with pride.

“Ha! 68,450 points an’ four stars! How’d ya like them apples?”

“Marvelous, simply marvelous, dear!” Rarity cried, giving the earth pony a celebratory hug. “I had no idea you were so…musically inclined!”

“Awe shucks, Rares, aren’t we all?” Applejack replied with a slight blush.

“If the situation calls for it, I suppose we are,” Rarity mused, alluding to the many times they had spontaneously broken out into song. “Now then, would anypony object if I were to go next?”

“Go get ‘em, Rarity!” Rainbow encouraged.

“Sure, go ahead!” Twilight concurred as Fluttershy smiled and nodded.

“Very well! I shall now make my selection.” Rarity pursed her lips as she too scrolled through the list. “Ah! I knew I’d find you here, Bon Colti!” She selected ‘Medium’ and with that, her turn commenced. “This one is for a certain snobby, spoiled, snot-nosed, pathetic excuse for a buffoon of my acquaintance!"

Much to everypony’s amazement, Rarity played like a mare possessed, hitting almost every note as if she really were the roguishly handsome and talented Bon Colti himself. Spike could only watch in fear and amazement as she propelled the group to an even greater lead. She stood there panting as the song ended before carefully adjusting her slightly disheveled mane.

“Eeek!” she squealed with delight. “84,560 points and five shiny stars! Not too shabby if I do say so myself!” Spike wasn’t sure if he should be proud or nervous. He decided on the former and hoped that the last three wouldn’t fair quite as well. “Fluttershy, my dear, would you like to go next?”

“Um...”

“Ooh, me next, me next!” Pinkie Pie was practically flying off the walls with anticipation, eagerly (and impatiently) awaiting her turn.

“Pinkie Pie! Let Fluttershy decide!”

“Oopsie daisies! Sorry, Fluttershy!”

“It’s okay. You can go if you want. I don’t mind.”

“Thanks, Flutters!” Pinkie exclaimed. “Hmm... Ooh, I pickthis one!” She eagerly selected it, chose ‘Expert’, and stared at the screen with immense concentration.

“Um, Pinkie Pie, you do know that’s ‘Expert’ you’re playing on, right?” Twilight cautioned.

“Of course, silly!”

“Why’d you pick this one?” Twilight asked, puzzled by her friend’s choice.

“That’s an easy one! Look at the artist!” Twilight grabbed the game case and quickly studied the list on the back. Of course, she thought with a smile. “I mean, who else would I pick? Her hair’s P!nk, just like mine!”

As the reasoning behind Pinkie Pie’s song choice finally dawned on them, the group finally had a chance to marvel at the pink pony’s impressive skills. Thus far, she had made more mistakes than the others but that fact that she was conquering a song on ‘Expert’ on her first try belied any doubt. Being Pinkie Pie, she had a habit of surprising ponies.

Something among the group clicked as Pinkie played. Watching her perform made them realize that, much like anything Pinkie Pie ever did at any time, this was a show of self-expression. The group watched with happy smiles as Pinkie Pie showed everyone within earshot that she was who she was and damn proud of it. Nothing was gonna keep her down. Despite the fact that she was scoring points like a demon, Spike couldn’t help but appreciate her spirit and found himself applauding in earnest as the song ended.

“Wow! That was awesome, Pinks! I had no idea!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed, giving the pink pony a hug.

“Thanks, Dashie! That was sooo much fun!”

“Wonderful, simply wonderful!”

“That was sure sumthin’ Pinkie!”

“Awe, thanks, girls!” Pinkie replied, blushing slightly. “Fluttershy, you wanna go next?”

“If that’s okay with Twilight…”

“Sure, it’s fine with me. You’re up!” Twilight said as she passed the controller. Fluttershy took a deep breath, quickly selected her song, chose ‘Hard’ difficulty, and waited. The song began relatively calmly and although that itself wasn’t a shock, everything that transpired afterwards was.

“Um…Fluttershy, what is this? I can’t even read the title.” Twilight asked.

“Well, I’ve been reading Iron Will’s weekly articles in Equestria Daily and I’ve decided to try expressing any anger or aggression I might’ve been repressing in a positive or recreational way.” Fluttershy replied proudly.

“But I don’t see how this song could…”

A sudden intense and ratherjarring guitar riff interrupted the lavender unicorn and made everyone leap into the air in utter shock. Fluttershy, however, looked strangely at home as she practically pounded the buttons in near-perfect harmony with the song.

You’ve gotta be kidding me, Spike thought as the entire library, including its current occupants, shook from the sheer force of the volume coupled with the pounding bass line. He looked around in disbelief as every single book shook from its shelf and wound up scattered about on the floor. Upon seeing such a display, his will to win doubled.

Dead silence.

As Fluttershy’s turn ended, she nervously looked about the room as her six friends stared slack-jawed back at her.

“Too much?” the yellow pegasus squeaked.

"What the hay was that!?” Rainbow exclaimed, both shocked and impressed at the same time.

“Fluttershy...where did that come from?” Twilight asked.

“That was great!” Pinkie cried, hugging her friend whilst directing her attention to the results screen. “Lookie, lookie! You got over 100,000 points and five stars!”

Spike was still in disbelief; in a matter of minutes, his hopes for a weekend which he could finally call his own seemed to slip farther and farther from his grasp. If he had any chance at all of winning, he had to kick it up a notch or seven.

Ah well, at least Twilight shouldn’t pose much of a problem, he thought as she meticulously studied the song list. I don’t think she’s ever used a calculator, much less handle a controller, especially one shaped like a guitar. At this point, one would think that after having witnessed five other unexpected success stories, the young dragon would’ve learned his lesson...

“Alright, I’ll give this one a try!” Twilight announced, selecting ‘Medium’ difficulty.

“You can do it, Twi!” Applejack encouraged.

“Show ‘em what you’re made of!” Rainbow added.

Twilight's selection, although unsurprising, was nevertheless appropriate. Along with the others, she couldn’t help but sway and move to the upbeat tune and it wasn’t long before she had a solid grasp of the gameplay mechanics.

As with the others, Twilight’s tune was undoubtedly a show of self-expression. In just a few short lines, she had revealed more about herself and her feelings than in any other event in recent memory. It was clear that there was more to her than simply being a bookworm. This was a mare with so much potential, potential for experiences of love, or passion, and of course, an insatiable appetite for adventure and an overall love of life. This was a mare on a mission, a mare absolutely determined to fulfill some grand destiny, and her choice of song said it all.

“Whew!” Twilight wiped her brow as the song ended. “How did I do?”

“61,340 points!” Rarity answered. “Why Twilight, you’ve been holding out on us! That was simply fabulous!”

“And the way you used your Star Power was awesome!” Rainbow added.

“That was very nice.” Fluttershy offered.

“I guess that means it’s spike’s turn!” Pinkie Pie announced, tossing the controller his way.

“Well Spike, looks like you’ve really got yer work cut out fer ya!” Applejack said as he studied the track list. “Don’t feel bad, though. A’m sure it was just beginner’s luck.”

“Yeah, right! Speak for yourself!” Rainbow shot back. “When it comes to me and being awesome, luck’s got nothin’ to do with it!”

I’m not letting it end like this, no way, Spike thought as he reached the end of the list. Wait a minute, he thought as he hit the orange button, opening up the ‘Bonus Content’ section. His eyes were immediately drawn to one song in particular, a song that few dared attempt and only the truly skilled ever succeeded in conquering. Spike not only needed to win, but win convincingly so there could be no dispute over whether or not he got his well-deserved time off. As the crew waited, Spike took a deep breath and selected it, along with ‘Expert’.

“Hey, what’s this song?” Rainbow asked.

“Yeah, how come we didn’t see it on the list?” Twilight asked.

“Uh...that’s why...” Applejack replied as the mostridiculous combination of notes ever conceived bombarded the screen like a prismatic hailstorm. It was a torrent of blue, green, yellow, red, and orange the likes of which they’d never seen and yet Spike conquered them almost perfectly. His claws moved at such a pace that they were a blur, impossible to follow with the naked eye. Just when the six mares didn’t think it could get any crazier, the first actual lyrical portion began and everyone, including Spike, suspected that they were in for a long haul.

Spike’s performance was mesmerizing, perhaps even hypnotic. It seemed to defy the laws of what was musically and physically possible and as Spike’s note streak reached 800, even Pinkie Pie, famous for effortlessly defying every known law of anything, stared in disbelief.

It was the perfect song, the song, his song. It had to be. There was simply no other explanation for his inhuman ability to conquer such a fearsome beast. As he marveled the group of friends, other ponies who had heard the commotion began to flock to the library, curious as to what was going on. After all, never had they heard music emanating from the library, usually a silent sanctuary, now having transformed into what sounded like the end of the world as they knew it. Unaware of the rapidly growing crowd behind him, Spike carried on.

As the madness continued, the crowd, along with Spike, began to wonder how much he had left and some even question whether or not he could finish the song, now approaching six minutes of pure insanity. Fortunately, his respite came in the form of a small break between the solo and chorus, during which he cracked his claws and wiped his brow.

This is it, he thought. My freedom’s at stake here. One last hurrah and I’ve done it! I hope you’re watching, Rarity.

Spike winced as he felt his claws cramp up. He shook his head and forced himself to concentrate on the task at hand, deftly ignoring the searing pain. As he neared the end, he could feel his boundless youthful energy begin to wane as nothing short of agony set in. Focusing every ounce of will and energy the young dragon possessed, he powered through the last few notes and as it finally came to a close, fell backwards in total exhaustion.

There was a respectful hush as the crowd stared at his score. It was considerable, even such that anypony unfamiliar with the game’s scoring system could more than understand the magnitude of Spike’s accomplishment.

“Eight...hundred...867,450 points...” Twilight stammered. At that, the crowd erupted. It was as if they’d actually just watched a bonafide live performance, not just a video game. To the ponies of Ponyville who had never seen anything quite like it during the course of their lives, it was more than good enough. As for whom the winner of their little contest was, that was indisputable. Finally, as the crowd filed out, the mane six eagerly offered their congratulations.

“That was the third most coolest thing I’ve ever seen!” Rainbow cried, swooping down to give Spike a well deserved high-five, which he accepted from the floor.

“That was incredible, Spike!” Rarity concurred, rewarding him with a peck on the cheek.

“Hurr durr...” Spike mumbled with a goofy grin as Pinkie Pie suddenly hugged him.

“Ooh, you were so cool and awesome and great and fantastical and eeeeeek!” Overcome by excitement, Pinkie couldn’t help but squeal like a groupie, giving him an even tighter hug before relinquishing the panting dragon.

“Wow, Spike, you sure can throw one hay of a hootenanny,” Applejack added.

“It was very...nice.” Fluttershy offered from her hiding place under the stairs.

“Well, it looks like you win, Spike,” Twilight said, handing him the controller. You get the next week off, free of any chores or obligations!”

“Thanks, Twi,” Spike replied with a small smile, still trying to catch his breath.

“So, Spike,” Rainbow asked, landing beside him. “What are you gonna do for your week off?” The young dragon glanced over at the Xbox and immediately felt an intense pain in his claws. He sighed as the irony of the situation dawned on him.

“Anything but video games!”