The Pained Soliloquy of a God

by BowtiesandFedoras

Rating: teen
Tags: Sad, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Queen Chrysalis, Discord, Princess Celestia
Length: 1641

While scrolls and tomes may rot and decay, the dust of the moon is forever, and it now contains all of your sins, dearest sister. -Nightmare Moon

On the moon there is a message addressed to the mighty Princess Celestia. This message is engraved in the eternal dust of this barren desert of nothing, and within this eternal dust, are listed the past sins of the powerful Princess, written by none other than Nightmare Moon herself.

Published 2013-08-13 04:30:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-08-13 04:30:02 UTC

Dear Celestia,

My dearest sister, as it stands, I see no possible future where I could ever forgive you. You have betrayed me, betrayed my trust, and done pure injustice to our bloodline. Oh, how you have fallen. When I think about what you have done, I scream in disgrace and agony, though no one hears. I doubt anyone will ever know the truth about what you did, and what you have become. You have successfully brainwashed everyone else, without realizing that you yourself had been brainwashed as well. If only that wicked creature hadn't ever appeared in the first place. That "Discord!" I saw that he was nothing but evil from the start, but you refused to notice; he had you so firmly under his thumb.

And then, when you were at your weakest, he completely used you and nearly destroyed the kingdom. I was the only one fighting them, but you, you went to HIS side! You helped him! I was left fending off the changelings, and the manticores, and the dragons, while you WATCHED!

I had never felt so absolutely betrayed in all of my life. My own sister, the older one, the more mature one, the one I looked up to, had abandoned me, and let our castle fall.

He had charmed you with his looks, had swooned you with his swagger, and then put a curse upon you when you had trusted him completely. You had grown too soft towards him, and when your guard was down, he ensnared you. I kept telling you that his pleas of mercy, his acts of kindness, his stories of poverty, were all lies, but you didn't listen. You didn't see the wickedness in his eyes, the evil sneers he gave to all he thought were beneath him. But I saw it. I saw that he was a skilled liar. And you laughed in my face when I claimed that he was a Draconequus in the guise of a simple unicorn. You and I both knew that the wars had not wiped all of them out, that there were still some wandering around Equestria. But you didn't believe me. No: you didn't want to believe me. You wanted him to be real, to be the handsome, suave stallion you imagined him to be. You didn't want to face the fact that he was a monster. A monster just like all the rest.

Soon you began giving in to his malicious demands and his demeaning desires. You were going out after dark with him to cause trouble in the city. I had to protect you from the angry press as they asked why their princess was acting so poorly and causing distress at night. I even had to take the fall for you on more than one occasion. Yet you still kept going back to him, back to that monster of a man.

He only wanted to cause chaos from the start, as a way of getting revenge on us as a species for wiping his race out of existence. Well, nearly. He started using his wicked magic to throw the world around us into mayhem, and held you by his side as torture for me, making me watch my sister fall to his level. I suppose that was his game plan from the start as well: to torture both of us. My pain was watching you descend into depravity, and yours was destroying the image that you worked so hard to maintain.

Then one day, I saw him in the palace gardens talking to another woman. She was strange-looking, like she wasn't what she appeared to be. Her eyes changed color frequently, and then I came to the conclusion that she was a Changeling. I rushed to inform you that a Changeling had infiltrated our castle, and that she was talking to the demon you were under the spell of, in hopes that this news might snap you out of your trance, but that was a foolish idea. You not only didn't believe that a Changeling was in the castle grounds, but you accused me of trying to frame Discord for talking to another woman. You said I was jealous that you got to be with a handsome stallion, while I remained alone! You were angry that I would dare suggest such a thing about your dear "lover!" You shouted at me; berated me, and made me seem like the villain!

It was at this point that I had lost all hope for you. While my sister would do many things, she would never let the threat of danger to her people come before herself. And she would never raise her voice at me. I was the greatest thing in the world to her, but you, you are NOT her.

Now I knew for certain that Discord had you wrapped around his finger, and that you would not escape him anytime soon. The sister I knew was gone, the kingdom I knew was gone, and I was the only one who noticed it at all. I decided to take matters into my own hooves.

I confronted Discord when he was alone, and told the world what he really was. He put on a ruse of ignorance, claiming that he had no idea what I was talking about. Eventually you appeared to defend him, as I thought you might. I became so infuriated that I assaulted him after he whispered more lies sweetly into your ear to keep you hypnotized. You became angry at me and had me put in the dungeon for a week. That is when the horrific events climaxed. I remember a loud explosion, and then screaming. Then I found myself amongst chaos and catastrophe as the kingdom flooded with the changelings, led by their queen, Chrysalis, the one I discovered in the grounds. Then came the manticores, then the dragons, and they destroyed everything we had worked to create in the world. I looked up and saw him, in his true, wretched form, atop the highest tower, with you standing next to him. At that moment, my world shattered. In a blind rage, I attacked all of the invading beasts in a frenzy. I spotted Queen Chrysalis, and watched her join you and Discord on the tower, and saw him put his arm around her. You remained oblivious to his act. I set my sights on HIM. I completely shut out the world around me and went straight for HIM. He was hit with such force that he fell from his high perch, and crashed to the ground. I wanted to end him, right then and there; to tear him to pieces and stain the ground under him with his own blood. But YOU stopped me! You knocked me on my side with magic, and looked at me with such disdain and contempt at what I'd done. I had tried pleading with you one more time, trying desperately to change your mind, but in vain. You not open your eyes, so I used my last resort. I hit you with a beam of magic, but you were too strong for me. You countered it with your own magic, and I found myself in a dark, grey area that seemed to stretch for miles without end. I was confused, thinking that the world had been reduced to ash in the blink of an eye.

I looked up.

I saw the world. I saw the greens and blues of our homeland, and made out the shapes of the known continents. I began thinking about my situation for a moment, and it took almost a minute to finally understand what you had done...

You had sent me to the moon.

I spent the following month in pain, fear, confusion, and anger. I would sometimes go for hours on end, crying, screaming, and cursing the universe itself. But out of all the cursing, one name came up the most: Yours.

You, who had ignored me; you, who had dismissed my warnings; YOU, who had let that monster into your heart; YOU, who had been so weak in our city's time of need; and YOU, WHO HAD BANISHED ME TO THE MOON!!

I doubt any being has ever felt such pain and hatred as I have. The only idol I'd ever had, the only one I looked up to, had let me down.

I write this message in the dust of the moon as an eternal record of what really happened. As a message to the universe, so that it will never forget how you've wronged me. I don't doubt that as time passes, my mind will have left, and you will have made up some tale to try and justify yourself to future generations, perhaps a made-up fable about how I tried to do something wicked and you were the only one who could stop me. But then how will you explain Discord? Perhaps you will concoct something for him, as well.

I have decided to abandon the Luna that I once was, just as you abandoned the Celestia that I once loved, and become the embodiment of my feelings for you. I am now a being of anger, of hate, and shall forever be known as Nightmare Moon. I shall forever shout hate into the stars, and perhaps the message may reach you one day. The message of how I long to extinguish the sham of light you cast upon your loyal subjects. The message of how I will find a way to return to you, and to let you see what you have made me. Perhaps these messages will snap you out of your foolish infatuation for that monster.

Remember me,

Your beloved sister

Author's Note

This was my first one-shot. Tell me what you thought.