Daring Do trudged across the searing sand dunes with a sullen, slouching pace. Her mane hung in straggling, sweat soaked tangles over her scowling, dirt smudged face, and the broiling desert sun glittered across the red sequins of an evening gown that was no longer quite so form fitting and daringly cut (appropriate to its wearer) so much as tattered and torn. Her wings were pinned to her sides by a length of rope that gleamed faintly with sinister magic.
At her side, a chestnut pegasus stallion with a shock of coppery mane and dark freckles dotting his cheeks was in a similar predicament, his disheveled tuxedo jacket and formerly white shirt and unbound bow tie stained with dirt and perspiration beneath his own tightly bound wings. His cutie mark depicted a rocket with a vermilion trail of flame, that seemed to sizzle in the heat waves that rose and rippled all around them.
His name was Red Glare, and the look that he cast Daring was in keeping with his moniker. "I should have known you didn't buy me that drink. As soon as I saw you sit down at the bar I shoulda gotten up and galloped out the door. Nothin' good ever comes from crossing flight paths with a dizzy, dive bombin' dame like you , Do."
The bedraggled mare sneered back. "Yeah, and likewise nothin' that would actually cost money ever comes from you, you two bit, half wit sky bum. You're too cheap to even pay attention to a gal, let alone buy her a drink. That should have tipped me right off."
Both ponies glared over their shoulders at a raspy chuckle behind them. A quartet of looming, knobby kneed figures followed close on their heels, hard featured bull camels in dark turbans and sunglasses. Three of them wore flowing black cloaks, while the forth bore a small, covered howdah strapped atop his peaked hump.
Lounging in the shade of its fringed cupola atop a silken pillow was a mustard yellow rabbit with a look of glittering malice in his beady little eyes and an ebony black spiral horn sprouting from his forehead, that gleamed with the same violet magical aura that suffused the ropes binding the pegasus mare and stallion's wings. He wore a tiny fez atop his head, and an adorable little white suit coat and tie. A mouthful of sharp fangs gleamed beneath his twitchy, fuzzy nose as he regarded his captives with a smug grin.
Daring lashed her tail and growled her defiance. "You got something to say, bunny boy?"
She flinched aside as a deadly accurate gob of camel spit kicked up a small gout of sand at her hooves. As his companion worked up another mouthful, one of the bulls snarled at her in a thickly accented voice. "You speak with respect to the great Al Miraj, and only when you are bidden to do so, pony mare."
At this the horned rabbit let out another chuckle. "It is all right, my faithful servants. The illustrious Daring Do and I have enough history with one another to dispense with trivial formalities. Although it rends my heart to hear that you did not appreciate the refreshments I arranged for you and your companion last night at the club."
At this Red Glare cast his captors a wan look. "Well, I don't normally take my sherbet with quite so much knockout juice in it."
Daring rolled her eyes and snorted. "Yeah, you generally only take it if it's complimentary."
Red huffed and flicked an ear in irritation. "Okay. We all get it, Do. I got cash flow problems. Can we please focus on bantering with the bad guys right now?"
The intrepid mare shook her head to get her sweat soaked mane out of her smoldering crimson eyes as she turned her attention back to their tormentors. "How about we move past banter to brass tacks. What's this all about, Al Miraj? You didn't drug us and drag us all the way out here just to practice your gloating, and if you wanted to bump us off you would have done it back in Marekesh."
The sinister rabbit's predatory teeth flashed more brightly beneath his twitching nose. "Oh, make no mistake, my dear, I still would very much like to 'bump you off', as you say, but perhaps it need not come to that if the two of you would perform a much desired service for me." He winked a beady eye at the pair of poker faced pegasi. "Business, as always, before pleasure."
He bobbed his twisted horn beyond a low range of mountains in the distance, their wind scoured peaks standing stark against the pale, parchment colored sky. "Yonder are the Seven Mountains of the Gods. In the foothills of the Mountain of Sekhmet, there is a cave, and deep within the cave, beyond such fiendish traps as even one such as I shudder to contemplate, is..."
Daring huffed impatiently and rolled her crimson eyes. "... a mystic macguffin of legendary power that will let you take over the world. Blah blah blah. Even dumb ol' Ahuizotl would run out of fingers tryin' to count the times I'd heard that one before, not even counting the times I heard it from him."
She let out a squawk of pain and alarm as a hurtling gob of camel spit ricocheted off her backside with a sharp report, sending her pitching face first into the sand.
Red was instantly at her side, helping her to her hooves as she snorted and coughed and spat out a mouthful of grit. Daring took a rueful look at the new stain and missing sequins on her red dress, and could already feel a bruise forming at the northeast point of her compass rose cutie mark. She glared daggers back at Al Miraj. "You're gonna pay for that, flopsy. I don't own a lot of girl clothes, and this was my favorite dress."
The lapine mastermind's ears were laid tight back along either side of his fez, and a scowl darkened his fuzzy little features. The pillow beneath him glowed an eerie purple and floated up off of his hench-camel's howdah, darting forward to bring him into fierce eye contact with Daring as his voice came out a rasping hiss. The needle sharp tip of his horn hovered between her wide, crossed eyes. "I am being more than generous allowing you meddling half-portions of jackal meat to continue drawing breath, do not squander my precious mercy with any further insolence."
The pegasus mare swallowed hard and gave a nervous bob of her head. "So... uh... this d-doodad you want us to get for you..?"
Al Miraj's lips compressed into a tight line as he spun his cushion and levitated back to the howdah with a flick of his soft cottony tail. "Yesss. The Amulet of Kaboo." He reared up and curled his fluffy little paws skyward in a paroxysm of megalomania with a maniacal gleam in his eyes." It is written that to hold it in two paws and speak its name is to be granted boundless power."
Daring snorted and lashed her sand crusted tail. "And you want us to be the ones who put it in your paws, huh?"
The villainous rabbit chuckled, his sharp toothed smile returning as he settled back onto his pillow. "If it's not too much trouble."
Red set his hooves with a pugnacious look settling on his freckled face. "And what if it is too much trouble?"
Al Miraj's smile tightened at the corners. "Then your wretched carcasses will vanish among the sands, until such time as perhaps many years hence a pony of Miss Do's alleged profession might chance across your bones and return them to Equestria to be mounted in a museum."
Daring wheeled with a huff and started walking again. "Heard something like that before too, and I haven't wound up in an exhibit yet."
She cast the coppery maned pegasus stallion a look and jerked her head toward the distant mountains. "C'mon, Red, lets get a move on before our brains cook in our skulls like eggs in a couple of frying pans."
Red scowled over his shoulder at their captors as they set out once more. "Y'know, we could get this over with a lot quicker if you'd just untie our wings and let us fly there."
Al Miraj flicked an ear as a smirk compressed his fuzzy yellow cheek, then bobbed his horn at one of his lanky minions. The ruddy pegasus stallion let out a yelp and ducked as a small gob of spittle grazed the top of his head between his laid back ears. "HEY! It was just a suggestion!"
There was an edge menace beneath the fiendish rabbit's purring tone. "I suggest you insult my intelligence no further, pony. Now keep walking, and only where I tell you to."
~~~
A few hours of stumbling over dunes, followed by a few more hours of stumbling over rocks as the ocean of sand washed upon the stony shores of the Mountain of Sekhmet's foot hills, found the party of captors and captives standing before a rock formation that vaguely resembled the roughly carved head and forepaws of a gigantic stone lioness.
Daring collapsed to her knees on the stony ground, parched and panting. "Whelp... This... is the... place... isn't it?"
Red flopped forward onto his belly at her side. "'Course... it's the... p-place... Why... hide... your treasure... in a... boring old... normal... cave... when you can... hide it... in one... that... looks... like a... loopty... loopin'... lion. Nopony would... ever... think... to look... there..."
The bedraggled pegasus mare cast him a wan look. "You... wanna... keep... lookin'... sport?"
The prostrate stallion waved a feeble hoof. "No... this is... fine..."
At a nod from Al Miraj, one of the bull camels fished beneath his cloak and produced an oilcloth water skin, which he tossed between them with a perfunctory thud. The black horned rabbit gave them an oleaginous grin. "There. Refresh yourselves and rest a moment before we press on."
Daring and Red licked their parched lips and cast a wary glance at the vessel, then at each other, and then back at their captors. Al Miraj rolled his glittering, button like eyes in exasperation. "I assure you that this drink isn't drugged. I need your speed and cleverness, Miss Do, and your speed, Mister Glare..."
At this Red's face mirrored his surname as he drew himself up indignantly. "Hey!"
The sinister rabbit gave a huff and continued. "... for you to lead us safely to the chamber where the amulet lies."
Daring reached out with eager hooves and grasped the water skin, yanking the stopper free with her teeth and drinking the precious liquid inside in huge, profoundly thirsty gulps.
Red turned his attention toward her with further indignation as the vessel's oilskin sides began to collapse. "Hey!"
With that he yanked it from her hooves and greedily gulped down his share after pausing a moment with a blush flitting across his cheeks to wipe the spout on his tattered tuxedo sleeve.
Daring pulled her gaze away and turned a weary scowl at the villainous rabbit as she climbed painfully to her feet. "Okay, so what now, Al Miraj? Secret key? Magic Spell? Password? Riddle?"
Her diminutive lapine foe let out another rasping chuckle. "An apt question. Ever the professional, Miss Do, whatever that profession might be."
She tossed her head defiantly. "Archeologist! That's my story and I'm stickin' to it!"
The horned rabbit rolled his beady eyes again, then turned his attention toward the rock formation. "A password is the order of the day."
With that, Al Miraj reared up on his haunches and spread his adorable paws wide with a flourish. "Open Sesame!"
The ground beneath their hooves began to shake as a deep rumble filled the air. The mouth of the stone lioness opened with majestic slowness as small chips of rock cracked loose and tumbled down the sides of its roughly chiseled muzzle. The camel bulls took a step back, gaping in awe as Red tossed aside the water skin and scrambled to his feet.
Daring shot Al Miraj a deadpan look as the rumbling died away, leaving a gaping stone maw with stalactite teeth, open into the dark depths of the earth. "Open Sesame? Really? What is this, 'A Thousand and One Arabian Neighs'?"
The rabbit mastermind gave a shrug in reply. "Most of the time the ancients wouldn't bother to change it." His fuzzy, horn bedecked brow furrowed over a vicious grin. "I assure you that this is nothing compared to the perils that lie within'."
Daring flicked an ear. "Of course. An simple lock on a scary door as a 'keep out' sign, keeps the casual passers by away, then save the gruesome stuff for anypony nosy enough to ignore the warning."
Red gave her a sidelong glance. "You sure you're an archeologist, Do? You sound more like a tomb raid... OW! GEEZ!"
She cut him off with a swift kick to the shin, keeping her focus on Al Miraj as the red headed pony glared at her and rubbed the new bruise on his fetlock. The sinister rabbit gave a nod toward the maw of the cave and spoke in a voice that would brook no argument. "Now... if you two would kindly take the lead so that we can proceed."
Daring and Red exchanged a glance, and then with drooping tails began to walk forward. As they passed beneath the stony teeth of the cave mouth, the chamber filled with a yellow-orange light, issuing from a large, bulbous lantern hanging from the roof of a tunnel entrance roughly seven pony lengths away. Further lights flickered on in the eerie silence of the passage beyond.
The two pegasi stopped, glancing about warily, and Red leaned in to murmur to his companion. "Uh... should I be nervous that that lantern ahead of us kinda looks like a big ol' uvula?"
She whispered back. "I'm more concerned about the bunny and his goons behind us. Gimme a second and follow my lead, okay?"
Their eyes met, and the red headed stallion gave her a curt, subtle nod and whispered back. "You are such a pain in the flank."
They stopped a short distance into the cave, and Daring glanced up at the jagged, teeth like formations above, then back down at the gloating rabbit and his servants, who now stood directly beneath them. "So, uh... I got a question here, Al Miraj."
The horned bunny flicked an ear and waved his fuzzy paw in mock magnanimity. "Ask away, Miss Do."
A slight smirk came to her dirt smudged face as she glanced up at the cave's stony jaws. "What happens if somepony says 'CLOSE SESAME !' ?"
Red grabbed Daring tightly in his forelegs and hurled them toward the floor deeper into the cave.
A blank look washed across Al Miraj's twitchy little face as the deep bass rumble from the depths of the earth filled the air once more. One of the camel bulls let out a full throated "AIEEEE!" as he and his brethren spun on their heels and scrambled for the outside with their knobby kneed legs flailing and stumbling. The stone lion's mouth slammed shut with a thunderous, shattering crash.
~~~
Al Miraj let out a feeble groan and struggled out from beneath the hump of his largest hench-camel and the smashed wreckage of his howdah, after the panicked bull tripped over his ungainly feet in a mad flight from the collapsing cave mouth and then tumbled tail over teakettle down the rocky slope outside to finally come to rest on his back with his feet in the air, lying in a hollow with particularly pointy stones . Overall, the experience had been similar to lying on a road and being run over by a caravan of wagons.
All around them the other three humpbacked thugs were milling about uncertainly as their diminutive lord and master reared up half dazedly on his haunches and numbly dusted off his suit coat with his fluffy paws. He reached up and patted behind his horn where his fez normally was perched, and then cast about for it in dull panic after finding only his bruised, fuzzy scalp. He spotted the tiny red hat just as it was crushed beneath the heavy tread of one of his servants, who leaned down with a solicitous look on his pendulous face. "Are you all right, effendi?"
A crackling purple glow appeared around the startled camel, lifting him a hoof's width into the air and then tossing him aside to smack into one of his comrades, knocking them both sprawling. Al Miraj woefully examined the flattened fez, which burst into violet flames and ablated into wisps of ash as a beat later the blackest of scowls twisted the sinister rabbit's features. "That mare..."
His ears drooped as a look of sick realization washed across his face, to be instantly replaced by an even blacker expression of wild eyed murder. "THE MARE!"
He scampered up the rocky hillside and came to a stop at the leonine rock formation, hopping furiously on his hind legs and shaking his fluffy little paws in fists of rage. "OPEN SESAME! OPEN SESAME!" He glared wildly over his shoulder with red rimmed, gleaming eyes at his stunned cohort. "GET UP YOU HALF-WIT SONS OF JACKALS! GET IN THERE! GET THEM! MAKE THEM PAY FOR THIS INSULT IN PAIN! IF THEY ESCAPE YOUR OWN SUFFERING SHALL BE TENFOLD! GET THOSE PONIES!"
~~~
Daring shook off her daze from the shock of being tackled to the floor, and found herself in Red's embrace. A fierce blush stole across her features, that quickly abated as he groaned and began to stir. She shoved him away and leapt hastily to her feet, casting a searching look around the chamber that was now much dimmer with only the illumination of the glowing lantern.
Red huffed and shot her a wan expression as his voice dripped with sarcasm. "Great plan, Do. Now we're stuck in here."
She replied with a grin and a wink. "Relax, hotshot, I don't get 'stuck' in tombs, catacombs, or dungeons. We'll find a way out somehow. The whole point was to get rid of that cottontailed creep and his drooling torpedos."
Both ponies blinked in consternation as the room started to rumble and a crack of daylight began to slowly widen behind them. Red looked back over his shoulder as the sound of shrill, shrieking threats of horrible torture and doom began to squeak through the crack over the deep bass of the cave's maw opening. He gave Daring an alarmed look. "Looks like we didn't get rid of them for long. We'd better move!"
With a nod, they both fled at a gallop toward the corridor beyond, with the intrepid mare shouting "CLOSE SESAME!" over her shoulder to buy them a few seconds more time. The fanged cave slammed shut with a resounding crunch once more, with frantic cries of "open sesame" mixed with vile curses seeping muffled through the thick rock face.
They made their way down the rough hewn stone tunnel at breakneck speed, screeching to a halt at what appeared to be an impassible dead end. The tunnel opened over the cliff face of a deep chasm lined at the bottom with a spiky floor of jagged stalactites. It was about two pony lengths across, an easy jump for a healthy pegasus even without their wings, if there were only somewhere to land. All there seemed to be across from them was a flat, vertical stone wall decorated with an intricate geometric pattern of radiating lines. Two more softly glowing yellow lanterns hung from the ceiling above.
Daring and Red shared a brief, smug grin, and backed up a few paces. The copper maned stallion made a flourish with his fore hoof. "Ladies first."
She gave him a wry smirk and pointed at the spike pit before them. "Aren't you gonna toss your coat down for me so I can walk across?"
He snorted and shook his head. "Can't. It's a rental."
Daring rolled her eyes and leapt forward with a hop, skip, and a jump, with Red following close on her heels. They both landed easily on the polished stone platform across the chasm, then cantered down the hall beyond until it dead ended at an enlarged section of the pattern on the wall they'd left behind, illuminated by another lantern that perfectly matched the glow of the ones over the spikes. Without further ado they ducked down the concealed tunnel to the right and made their way deeper into the cave.
The builders of the catacombs had created a flawless tromp l'oeil using a simple trick of perspective to make the wall over the jagged stalactite pit appear flat and featureless, but they had not counted on a pegasus' uncannily sensitive depth perception, let alone their instinctive feel for air flow. A creature without these abilities, or even one with magical powers who could exhaust their reserves searching for an illusion spell, would be fooled.
Which indeed they were, as in a patter of broad, two toed hooves the quartet of bull camel thugs and their raging lapine master came to a clumsy stop at the cliff edge Daring and Red had just vacated.
Al Miraj skittered to the edge beneath his minion's long, knobby legs and glared across at the impossible seeming barrier, grinding his fangs and hopping with rage as his twisted black horn shot purple sparks. "AGH! A THOUSAND CURSES UPON THEM! WHERE HAVE THEY GONE?!"
His hench-camels stood nervously, not daring to move or even breathe too heavily as the furious rabbit crouched at the lip of the chasm and fumed, his white hot rage lapsing to sullen fury. Finally, the bravest of them spoke meekly to the seething little creature between his hooves. "E-effendi? Pardon this foolish one's ignorance, but what would you have us do now?"
Al Miraj let out a weary sigh and spun on his heel, stomping back toward the cave mouth with a sour look scrunching up his twitchy little nose. With a casual flick of his glittering horn he shoved the camel thug who'd dared to address him headlong over the ledge, where the screaming, flailing bull was saved at the last moment from gruesome impalement on the stalactites below by one of his brethren lashing out with his long neck and painfully clamping his falling cohort's tail in his teeth and pulling him back to safety. They lay in a tangled pile of gangly limbs and necks, panting and trembling with terror.
They stared after their diminutive master as he flicked his cotton tail and waved a paw, not even looking back at them. His rasping voice echoed down the hall. "Outside! We will wait in ambush!"
His brow darkened beneath his black horn as the anticipation vile revenge percolated through his evil little bunny brain. "Knowing those two they will make their way out of the catacombs eventually, and we will be there when they do."
~~~
Red cast a wary look down another corridor that stretched ahead of them. "Well, Do? What do you make of this?"
They faced a worked tunnel, wide enough for two ponies to walk side by side. The floor was covered with polished tiles, each with a bright flower adorning the center. At the far end, an equally cheery mosaic of a pale she-camel with a succession of beaded necklaces around her neck, which bent down to bring her nose to an ornate bloom. These lovely touches were offset by dark grooves in the sandstone walls, which were marked with darker stains that both ponies didn't want to think too deeply about.
Daring rubbed her chin thoughtfully, and looked up toward the ceiling. There were more warmly glowing lanterns, their light made hazy by a drapery of cobwebs that hung from what would have been a difficult to see network of tripwires, or in this case flapwires. Clearly the builders of these traps hadn't completely discounted flying intruders. That was a moot point right now, however, as both ponies' wings were still bound.
She squinted as she peered down the hall at the mosaic, mouthing the words chiseled beneath it to herself, and then turned to her companion with a wan look on her face. "Well, my Ancient Ponecian is kinda rusty, but I think it says 'Stop and smell the flowers.'"
Red furrowed his brow. "So is that supposed to be helpful?"
She gave him a shrug as she ruffled her wings in their bindings. "Dunno. I guess we'll have to see."
He pursed his lips and jerked his head toward the foreboding passageway. "Uh... Ladies first?"
Daring glared back at him. "I think we'd better go together, so that neither of us has to watch the other make any fresh stains on the walls."
Red nodded. "Okay. You ready?"
She nodded back. "Yeah. Lets go."
With that, they stood side by side and stepped out onto the first tile.
So far so good. They exchanged a skittish glance, then took another step.
On the third step they felt a click beneath the tiles. All their instincts screamed to take to the air, as they felt a breeze and a blast of dislodged dust come from the grooves in the wall, but their wings strained uselessly against their bindings. Daring tensed all over, looking in every direction. Spinning scythes or saw blades, she guessed, from the characteristic whirring. Poison darts were more of a New World thing, and generally came with a puff of compressed air or the twang of a spring.
She let out a squeal as Red turned and shouted at her, a look somewhere between revelation and panic on his face. "STOP AND SMELL THE FLOWERS! SMELL THE FLOWERS!"
He shoved her head toward the floor with a rough hoof, banging her chin on the florally decorated tile, as both ponies' spines stiffened beneath huge scimitar blades that spun out from the wall and barely cleared their withers. They came from both sides, screeching and clashing in the middle and raining sparks down on them. The two pegasi stared with wide, goggling eyes as a third spinning blade shot up through a slot between the tiles in front of them, missing the tips of their snouts by a hair's breadth.
They stayed with their heads bent down, as if they were grazing, while the whirring blades retracted. With a shaky laugh Daring looked over at Red and leaned in to give him a peck on the cheek. "Good going, Red. If I'd been standing up straight I'd never get to wear my pith helmet anymore."
He blushed and stammered his thanks with a coy smile. Both pegasi felt a chill run up their spine as the sound of something mechanical clacked in the walls behind them. As they watched in growing horror, staring past their fetlocks, two metal panels covered with short spikes extended out from the grooves in the wall, then pivoted upright on an iron axel at their midpoint, blocking the hallway. This barrier then proceeded to slowly advance toward them at a slow trot's pace.
Red glanced sidelong at Daring. "Hold that thought."
She looked back with tension furrowing her brow. "Only if we can keep our heads down. Move!"
The pair started walking at a brisk pace down the hall with their snouts to the floor as the spiked panels trundled along the grooves behind them. At random intervals, they'd stop when they felt a click beneath their hooves, waiting with the sweat beading on their foreheads as blades met above their backs and then popped up in front of their noses while the sweeping wall got ever closer to their backsides.
Finally, after what seemed like an excruciating series of starts and stops over the flowery tiles, with slicey doom waiting them if they straightened up their aching necks or surged forward to quickly to avoid the trundling spikes behind them, they came to another drop off, a mere pony length across, with a clear, spacious platform on the other side.
Daring and Red only spared a cursory glance below, averting their eyes respectfully from the broken skeletons of those who hadn't been able to keep their head in the deadly corridor behind them.
The copper maned stallion grinned over at the disheveled mare at his side, and darted his head sideways to plant a peck on her cheek before leaping across to safety.
Daring stood stunned, leaping with a yelp as one of the spikes from the panel goosed her in the rump. Her hooves clattered on the rough granite of the other side, and she wheeled and decked Red with a right fore hoof cross with an angry blush on her face.
The sweeping wall rotated back to a horizontal position at the end of the flower corridor and retracted smoothly into the wall as the clacking died down. Red struggled to an upright position on his belly and snarled at her with his hoof pressing the sore spot on his jaw. "What the hay was THAT for?"
She glared back at him with her legs braced, pointing at the spot on her cheek where he'd kissed her. "What was THIS for?"
He lashed his tail as he climbed to his feet. "Hey, you did it first! It was for luck, I guess."
She hiked her own tail higher as her wings strained against their bindings. "You don't HAVE any luck to spare, bozo!"
He faced off with her. "Well maybe I wanted to borrow some more of yours!"
She stepped in closer. "Well work on your loopty loopin' timing! I got jabbed in the tuchus thanks to you!"
He pushed closer as well. "You'll get a swift kick back there too if you don't step off!"
She snarled in his face, their snouts nearly touching. "Just TRY it if you got the hailstones, bucko!"
He growled back. "You're just lucky a gentlecolt would never lay hooves on a lady."
She snorted. "You ain't no gentlecolt."
He sneered. "YOU ain't no lady."
They lapsed into furious silence, her crimson eyes glaring into his blue grey ones as their foreheads touched and steam came in puffs from their nostrils.
A beat later they embraced in a passionate, hungry kiss.
After a few minutes they parted and wheeled away from one another, gasping for breath.
Daring looked sheepishly over her shoulder, her cheeks a bright red against her burnt-orange coat. "Um... L-look, Red. I'm... I'm sorry about that, I was just kinda wound up from... well... all those ways we nearly just died right now and... well, I needed to let it out. I'm..."
Red looked over his own shoulder, rubbing the back of his head and not quite meeting her gaze as a blush blossomed behind his dark freckles. "Uh... yeah... I know what you mean... I guess... I mean... I'm sorry too... Wasn't thinkin' straight..."
Both pegasi's wings settled in their binding ropes as Daring scuffed at the floor with a hoof. "Yeah. Both of us kinda said... and did... things we didn't... um... r-really mean to do."
He gave her a lopsided grin and a shaky chuckle. "No real harm done. I hope you... uh... got that little bit of your luck back... y'know... from... from... that... y'know..."
She let out her remaining tension with a relieved laugh of her own. "Well... if... um... if you didn't you can keep it for now 'til we get out of this..."
Red nodded carefully as he extended a hoof toward her. "We'll call it an i.o.u. then, to be collected at a later date."
Daring reached up and took it and gave it a firm shake. "Sure sure. Any... anytime. If we make it out alive, I mean."
His gentle smile edged into a wry smirk. "And just to be safe, I'll keep an eye on your rump so nothing else bad happens to it."
She rolled her eyes and turned away to conceal a resurgence of her blush. "How 'bout you keep an eye out for trouble instead, meatball."
The intrepid mare nodded toward a corridor leading off to their left from the platform, lit with more warmly glowing lanterns. "C'mon. This way."
Red stole a furtive glance at her hiked tail as she turned, murmuring under his breath with a smile. "What do ya think I'm doin'?"
Daring paused at the door and flicked her ear. "What was that?"
He fell into step beside her. "Nothin'. Lead on, Miss Archeologist."
~~~
After a long, twisting path through natural stone passages with occasional alcoves lit by the magical lanterns, they came to another worked chamber, its floor a grid of tiles decorated with different plant designs. Beyond was an archway leading to a darkened space beyond. Here and there, huge blocks of rough hewn granite were embedded in the floor in crumbling piles. A glance upward, lit by the light of a single lantern in the center of the ceiling, showed gaps in a larger stone grid where they'd come from. A glance at the base of one of the piles, with a set of bony hooves of indeterminate species sticking out from beneath, told the grim story of their purpose.
Daring stood and scrutinized the floral images on the tiles, half talking to Red and half thinking out loud to herself. "Mmm. Another old school trap. I've seen it so many times all over the world that I've gotten in a few arguments with Thor Neigherdahl at the Globe Galloper's Club over whether it was carried to the New World by colonists from the Old World or just originated spontaneously in different cultures."
The chestnut pegasus stallion nervously tapped his hoof on the stone floor outside the tiles, prompting a cautionary glare from his companion that stilled his pawing. "So what's it do?"
She bobbed her head toward the different designs, then at the remains sticking out from beneath one of the huge blocks. "Well, this kind of setup has two basic kinds of tiles, that I call 'whew tiles' and 'uh-oh tiles'. If you can figure out which are which, you can get across safely without winding up like poor old mister pancake over there."
He nodded thoughtfully in return. "Okay, so which are the safe ones and which are the dangerous ones here?"
She looked at the tiles, then at him, then back at the tiles, then back at him, then gave a shrug. "No loopty loopin' idea. Best guess, you're supposed to step on weeds and not step on the flowers, but I don't really know too much about gardening and they all kinda look the same to me." She wiggled one of her bound wings as she gave him a sheepish look. "Pegasus, y'know?"
Red pursed his lips as he glanced around the cave. "Yeah. Same here. So how are we gonna cross this room then?"
Daring let out a sigh. "Well, one of the big perks of being a pegasus is kinda unavailable right now so... I guess run really fast?"
Her companion rolled his eyes skyward. "LIke I keep sayin', Do... yer nothin' but trouble."
She rolled her eyes right along with him. "No, what you keep sayin' is: 'Can I borrow five bits 'til next Thursday?"
He huffed and flicked an ear. "Well, if we want to make it to next Thursday we'd better run as fast as we can."
Daring gave a soft snort and craned her neck back to unzip the tattered remains of her red sequined dress and let it slip to the floor, stepping out of it with a rueful last look. Red's wings strained against their bindings, and he hastily looked away and proceeded to shrug out of the wreckage of his tuxedo, letting out a sigh as it dropped to the ground. Daring's gaze lingered for a moment before she turned her attention to stretching her legs.
Divested of everything that would slow them down except for the sinister, unbreakable magic ropes immobilizing their wings, they stepped up to the edge of the tiles and shared a look, both blushing slightly in spite of themselves.
She lashed her tail and tried to cover with a smirk. "How about the loser buys the winner lunch at Pita's Falafel Palace back in Marekesh?"
He grinned back. "I think we'll both be winners if we make it across alive."
She let out a chuckle. "We'll go dutch."
He extended his hoof. "Deal."
She took it and gave it a firm shake. They looked into each other's eyes, both leaning tentatively forward to maybe kiss, thought better of it, and both turned their attention toward their goal across the broad expanse of potentially fatal hoof falls. They dropped into starter's positions, their wings tense against their sides.
Daring nodded. "Ready?"
Red set his hooves. "Set."
They both reared up as one, kicking their fore hooves in the air as they cried out in unison. "GO!"
~~~
Al Miraj crouched sullenly in the shade provided by one of his hench-camels, waiting and watching the gaping mouth of the lion shaped rock. His other minions were positioned nearby, waiting to rain loogies of doom on the ponies that vexed their master so.
One of the villainous rabbit's long ears perked up at the deep, distant sound of thunderous rumbling coming up from beneath the ground. He gave it an irritated flick and laid it back alongside the other, letting out a low growl and muttering to himself. "I swear by the deepest burrows in Tartarus that I will slaughter those stupid ponies if they let themselves get killed down there."
~~~
It was pitch black, and Daring coughed and spat out a mouthful of dust. "Those... those... lousy prehistoric JERKS! There was nothing but 'uh-oh' tiles back there! That's not fair at all!"
A muted groan sounded at her side accompanied by some shifting gravel. "Mmmn. You're pretty amazing, darling... uh... Daring, noticing that kind of detail while you're running for your life."
She shrugged in the darkness. "It's a survival instinct. Too easy to blunder into dart holes or lurking ceiling crocodiles otherwise."
Her voice cracked a little. "So you alive, Red?"
The clop and scrape of hooves groping could be heard. "Yah. Close enough to it. How 'bout you, Daring?"
She reached out until she felt him, and they pulled one another into a tight embrace, their wings shifting across their backs. "Yeah, still here... Wherever here is."
They disengaged and Daring could hear the rustle of Red rummaging under his wing, followed by his low voice in the stillness. "Hang on a second. Got my lighter here. Gonna spark it up. Here's hopin' theres still some fluid left."
With a soft *flink* sound a yellowish flame appeared, filling the space around them with an intimate glow. The two pegasus ponies looked at each other in the dim light and smiled. They were both bruised and battered, disheveled and weary, but they were both alive.
Daring glanced at the silvery square of the lighter adhered by a minor tactile binding to his fore hoof, it's face emblazoned with the image of a mare giving a saucy wink through an upturned horseshoe. "I didn't know you smoked, Red."
The stallion gave a firm shake of his head and a grinned. "Naw. Filthy habit, and too expensive anyway. This is for firecrackers n' sparklers."
He looked around with a rueful look on his face. "And for emergencies."
The archway was a few paces away, completely blocked by crumbled stone blocks and other detritus. Otherwise, they were in a small, rounded cave, with no apparent exits in the smooth stone around them. In the center of the chamber, which was perhaps four pony lengths in diameter at the most, was a low, rough hewn pedestal with a small chest sitting atop it.
Red bobbed his head toward the chest. "Would it be asking too much for that to have the all powerful macguffin thing in it?"
Daring looked back at him past shrugging shoulders as she crept over to it. "Could be another trap."
He brought his flickering lighter over to help her examine it, and let out a rueful sigh. "Well, if it is that's fine with me. Better a goner now than a goner in however long it'll take us to run out of air or starve in here."
Daring brushed a hairpin from her mane and plucked it up off the stone floor in her teeth, leaning in to fiddle with the chest's latch. She gave him a wan, sidelong glance as she worked."You're a real barrel of laughs right now, Red."
He held the lighter close so she could see what she was doing. "Well, normally I'd be running in little circles and screaming my head off 'cause I am kinda... well be honest, I'm really claustrophobic." The little flame glinted in his eyes. "But I'm tryin' to keep a lid on it 'cos I wanna make however long we got left as good for you as I can manage."
Her lips tightened on the hairpin as a soft blush bloomed on her cheeks. Her eyes glistened a bit at the corners as she turned her head to meet his gaze.
A beat later a soft click came from the chest's latch and it popped open. Daring spat out her impromptu lock pick and traded a glance with Red, then turned and pushed the lid up with both fore hooves. The coppery maned stallion leaned in with his lighter and let out a whistle as his eyes caught the glint of gold on a mouldering pad of red velvet.
Daring picked up a plate of gold roughly the size and shape of half a saucer, a hemisphere with a zigzag edge on its right side. An inscription in ancient Mareabic shifted and merged into modern Equestrian letters spelling out the word "KABO" on it's face.
Red whispered to her in an awestruck voice. "Is that the Amulet of Kaboo?"
She pursed her lips in thought. "I... guess? It says 'Kabo' here."
He cocked an eyebrow. "Like down on the coast of Mexicolt? They have this awesome bar down there with amazingly cheap umbrella drinks..."
Daring gave him a wan look. "Not likely, Red."
His attention shifted to the chest. "Wait, there's another one in here." He reached in his free hoof and pulled out an identical plate, this time with its zigzag edge down its left side. The mystic letters on its face shifted to read "OBIE"
Red's brow furrowed. "Obie?"
Daring held out her plate and lined it up with his. "They look like they fit together."
With a pensive nod he brought the piece he held and touched it to hers, the two hemispheres forming a full circle. They both read the singled word formed by the halves. "Kaboobie?"
At that moment Red's lighter sputtered and went out. Daring grumbled in the pitch blackness. "Aw Ponyfeathers."
A moment after that the cave was filled with a gleaming corona of golden light, and both ponies let out a cry of alarm as a boom of thunder nearly deafened them. Even if they had been deaf, however, they would have heard the mighty, deep bass voice that echoed far over their heads. "OH HO HO HO HO! SALAAM AND WELL MET, MY LITTLE PONIES!"
Daring and Red willed their eyes open to behold an amazing sight. The tiny chamber they'd been trapped in had suddenly ballooned into a huge, vaulted cavern as big as Canterlot Castle. Towering over them was a gigantic, golden brown bull camel with huge, tawny wings sprouting from either side of his hump. A dark goatee jutted from his chin beneath a broad smile, and a black topknot trailed from the back of his head, bound by a gold clasp. His only other adornments were a large gold hoop earring in one of his ears and a set of bronze bracers girding his forelegs.
The intrepid pegasus mare shook her head to clear it, and turned to gently shove her stallion companion's jaw closed, then faced the overwhelming apparition and spoke to him in a shaky voice. "Um... Hi. Who... who might you be... uh... sir?"
The giant camel gave them a deep bow. "I AM KABOOBIE, GENIE OF THE SUNDERED AMULET AND SERVANT OF THE SEERESS OF THE SEVENTH MOUNTAIN. IT IS A PLEASURE TO MAKE YOUR ACQUAINTANCE, DARING DO, AND YOURS AS WELL, RED GLARE."
She blinked. "You... know our names?"
Kaboobie let out a rumbling chuckle as he shrank himself down to merely loom over them instead of towering. "Well, I do work for a seeress, plus... you know... genie."
Red finally shook out of his shock and awe. "Wait. So... if you're a genie, do... do you grant wishes?"
The winged camel gave him a warm grin. "Oh ho ho. I am not a charitable foundation, nor am I the government, my young pegasus. I do not grant wishes. Although I would be willing to exchange a certain number of them for services rendered."
He chortled as they exchanged a puzzled glance. "Ho ho ho. I'm sure that you are heartily sick of cryptic riddles, having bravely or foolhardily made it all the way down here, so I shall make it plain."
He pointed a broad, two toed hoof at the gleaming plate in their hooves. "It is not given to me to touch the amulet or work my magic upon it, but I would see it returned to its rightful owner."
Kaboobie gave them a mirthful wink. "Therefore, if two young ponies of fleet wing would carry it to the seventh mountain in this chain, known in these days as the Mountain of Ra, and deliver it to the current seeress, one Henna Baba, who lives upon its peak, then I would gladly make three wishes come true for them."
Red blinked up at him. "And... these two ponies would be us, right? Ow!"
He turned and glared at Daring and spoke to her in a harsh whisper as he rubbed his bruised hock. "Geez! Sorry if I'm slow on the uptake. I'm a little freaked out right now, okay?"
The intrepid mare ignored him and cocked a thoughtful eyebrow up at the genie. "Um... so just to make sure we're on the same page, could we wish for you to send us to the Mountain of Ra with the amulet in hoof?"
Kaboobie let out a booming laugh and shook his head. "OH HO HO HO HO. I'm afraid not, my clever little mare. I cannot perform the service in payment for performing the service. The paradoxical magical feedback would flood the deserts in chocolate milk, and for that matter it's hardly proper business practices."
He met her gaze with a twinkle in his eye. "I can, however, aid you should you run into trouble on the way, and I'll even be a mensch and get you out of this cave and suited to travel for free, so you don't have to use up any wishes on that."
Daring and Red shared another look, shrugged at one another, and turned back to face the tawny winged camel.
She gave a nod. "Yeah, I'm game."
He nodded too. "Sure. Sounds like fun."
Kaboobie threw back his head with a mighty laugh, as he expanded to gigantic proportions and billowing trails of crackling smoke flowed from beneath his wings. "OH HO HO HO HO HO HO HOOO! EXCELLENT! LET US BEGIN, THEN, MY LITTLE PONIES!"
A boom of thunder echoed in the fanged mouth of the leonine cave, and a cloud of smoke cleared to reveal Daring Do and Red Glare standing with blank looks of shock on their faces, which changed to expressions of elated surprise when they looked themselves over.
The magic ropes that had bound their wings were gone, and they'd both been outfitted in their accustomed adventuring gear, Daring in her khaki shirt and trusty old pith helmet, and Red in his panel front canvas flight jacket and the bronze Royal Air Cavalry helm he'd inherited from his grandfather. The two halves of the amulet hung from their necks from a length of gold chain.
They gave a start, twitching their ears as Kaboobie's disembodied voice murmured in them. "Join the halves together, then speak my name and thy wish, if you should have need of me. Best of luck! Ho ho ho ho."
After blinking their lingering bemusement away, Daring arched her back and stretched her wings with a luxurious sigh. "Mmm. You wouldn't believe how good this feels."
Reds wings were straight out from his shoulders, and he ruffled and refolded them. He gave her a wry smile and a wink. "Looks good too. You were really workin' that little sequined number, but I think that outfit suits you the best, if you don't mind my sayin'."
A smile crept across Daring's face in response, and she took a step closer to him. "I don't mind, in fact I kinda feel the same about that getup of yours." She pawed the ground. "You wanna settle that i.o.u., before we set out?"
He nodded and doffed his helmet. "Sure."
She took off her helmet too, holding it the crook of her foreleg, and their lips met for a brief kiss. When they parted and their eyes met, Daring let out a soft chuckle. "I think that evens out our luck for now."
Red nodded as they both donned their helmets again. "Yeah, I think we're set. Lets go!"
Side by side they stepped out of the cave, freezing in their tracks with wings flared in alarm as Al Miraj's shrill, rasping voice rang out. "THERE THEY ARE! FIRE!"
The pegasus adventurers scrabbled in a panicked gallop across the stony ground and dove for cover behind a boulder for shelter as a hail of spittle kicked up bursts of scattering gravel in their wake. They crouched low with their wings tightly folded and their hooves over their heads as the other side of the stone dampened and crumbled beneath the camel thugs' rapid fire onslaught.
Daring gave Red a wan look. "Y'know, I don't think we had a lot of luck between us in the first place."
He ruffled his wings and shrugged, gesturing with a hoof toward the mountains beyond. "Lets just buzz. It's not like a little spit's gonna knock either of of us out of the air."
They both flinched as a large rock enveloped in simmering purple magic smashed against their shelter. Red ran his hoof along the high collar of his jacket and swallowed loudly. "Okay, that might do it."
They ducked lower as another heavy stone shattered on their cover, showering them with bits of gravel. The spitting barrage went still as Al Miraj's voice sounded again, tremulous with barely restrained rage. "I WOULD MAKE YOU A BARGAIN, PONIES! I KNOW YOU HAVE THE AMULET! GIVE IT TO ME, AND I WILL CONSIDER MERELY TWISTING YOUR WINGS OUT OF THEIR SOCKETS AND LETTING YOU WALK OUT OF THIS DESERT ALIVE!"
Red rolled his eyes and met Daring's wry gaze. "Such a great deal! Whatta ya say, Do? Wanna give it to him?"
She returned his sly smirk with a chuckle. "Yeah. Lets give it to him."
They took the halves of the amulet in their hooves and brought the zigzag edges together, then spoke in unison. "Kaboobie! Get rid of these guys!"
The horned rabbit and his thugs all flinched as a peal of thunder echoed over the hillside. They looked up in awe and terror as a column of lightning wreathed cloud descended from the sky, twirling and resolving into the mighty figure of the genie Kaboobie. "OH HO HO HO HO! WHAT'S THIS I SEE? SOME NAUGHTY CALVES BLOWING SPIT WADS? WELL, PERHAPS I CAN JOIN IN YOUR GAME AS WELL, LITTLE BROTHERS OF THE EARTH."
With that, he sat back on his haunches and conjured a cyclone between his hooves. This took on solidity and broad bands of color as a gigantic striped tube. Setting this aside, the mountainous winged camel reached down and scooped up the cowering knot of mortal camels and their furiously hopping, frothingly angry master, rolling them between his hooves into a tangled ball of flailing limbs and necks. Al Miraj's voice sounded out, muffled by the bodies of his terrified minions. "NO! NO! YOU SHOULD BE OBEYING ME! NOOO!"
Mighty Kaboobie took up his conjured tube, and shoved the wad of villains into one end with a casual smirk. He then raised it to his lips and blew a puff of air into it. The tangled ball of camels with the horned rabbit at its core launched out the other end and flew rapidly toward the horizon, trailing a five voiced chorus of fear and dismay. "AIEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeee." As they vanished, a tiny flaring star went *ping* and faded in the boiling azure sky.
~~~
The sun shone brightly on the courtyard of the Sultana's palace in the many domed capitol city of the Dromedarian Empire. A gentle breeze blew off the nearby river and rustled the leaves of the date palms as the august she-camel sat languidly in the shade of her favorite balcony, reflections from the fountains glittering in the priceless jewels that draped in settings of gold around her elegant, swanlike neck.
Down below, a cadre of her finest guards drilled, their snowy white turbans and cloaks and the gilded bronze domes protecting their humps gleaming in the glare of the afternoon. The Sultana flicked an ear, jingling the hoops of gold that hung from it, as a distant sound of wailing came from over the horizon that grew louder and louder.
She blinked in shock as a tangled ball of bull camels dropped out of the sky and landed with a tremendous crash among her loyal soldiers. The pale she-camel scrambled to her feet and reared up to plant her forelegs on the railing. Her eyes widened as a tiny, yellow, long eared shape clad in a ragged suit coat and sporting a black horn on its head staggered free of the groaning pile, and she cried out in her clarion voice over the disrupted muddle in the courtyard. "By the Everfull Oasis, it is that villainous fiend Al Miraj and his band of ruffians! Seize them, my faithful guards! SEIZE THEM!"
Al Miraj shook off his daze with a ragged snarl and took to his heels, scampering at full speed across the courtyard as bursts of packed sand exploded in his wake from the rapid fire spit attacks of the Dromedarian Palace Guard. He bounded with desperation writ upon his twitchy little face toward a crack in the base of the high marble walls, wedging himself into it as more camel spit splattered all around his fluffy tail. With a high pitched shriek of effort, he shoved himself through, his jacket and shirt tearing free behind him.
Two of the Sultana's eager guardians skidded to a stop, and one plucked up the tiny, dirt stained white jacket in his pendulous lips and raised his long, sinuous neck to hold it aloft for his ruler while the his companion called to her. "He got away, your bejeweled majesty!"
She gave a huff of exasperation and pointed toward the palace's enormously ornate gate. "Go forth and search for him! He cannot be allowed to escape! GO!"
~~~
A ragged Al Miraj emerged from the other side of the wall into a shady back street and crouched, panting, as his tiny, black heart went pitter patter in his chest. His long ears twitched at the sound of gongs and trumpets sounding in the palace. Casting around with his mind whirring behind his evilly glittering eyes, he espied a bright pink pony with frizzy magenta curls sticking out from beneath a ridiculously large turban, sitting cross legged in a doorway on a small rug and blowing multicolored bubbles from an ornate hookah.
He scampered over and grasped the edge of the little carpet, yanking it out from under her and sending her toppling backwards into the door with a loud yelp, her extravagant head wear the only thing protecting her from a nasty bump on the noggin. As she struggled upright, he laid out his ill gotten rug on the street and clambered atop it, lighting his horn with sinister purple magic with a scowl on his face. The glow suffused the carpet and caused it to lift off, sailing away over the rooftops as its tiny, fuzzy occupant muttered dark curses and promises of vile vengeance under his breath.
The pink pony shook her hoof after him as her shrill voice rang out. "HEY! THAT WASN'T VERY NICE!"
~~~
Daring Do and Red Glare came out from behind the boulder as the gigantic Kaboobie caused the striped tube to vanish in a puff of smoke and dusted off his fore hooves with a satisfied grin. With a nod to one another the two pegasi took wing and flew up to the mighty genie's eye level.
Daring gave him a smile and a wave. "Thanks a lot, Kaboobie. Those guys were really getting to be a pain."
Red shaded his eyes with a hoof and peered toward the far horizon where the gigantic winged camel had launched them. "Where did you send them?"
Kaboobie let out a thunderous chuckle as his body dissipated into smoke, leaving only his floating, grinning face. "HO HO HO HO. SOMEWHERE WHERE THEY WILL FIND AS SOFT A LANDING AS THEY DESERVE AND MORE TROUBLE THAN THEY WOULD EVER WISH FOR."
He inclined his head to them a brief bow, his topknot fluttering in the wind. "NOW GO FORTH AND FLY SWIFT ON YOUR JOURNEY, MY LITTLE PONIES, AND MAY YOUR WAY BE UNTROUBLED." With that, his head disappeared in a puff of cloud and was gone.
Daring and Red wheeled and lit out, veering toward one another to bump hooves as they soared over the mountains toward the distant peaks, their tails whipping in the breeze as their wings caught the rising thermals and took them high into the bright sky.
~~~
Al Miraj shivered on his little carpet as it skated through the dark clouds overhanging a different, more foreboding range of mountains. Lightning crackled overhead as he wound swiftly between the crags until he came to a flattened peak topped by a massive wall of chaotically interwoven tree trunks, shattered boat hulls, and chunks of shingled roofs.
He caused his woven conveyance to settle on a displaced attic dormer and called down into the center of the vast ring of wreckage, his horn sputtering with purple sparks as he shrieked at the top of his little lungs. "WAKE UP, YOU GREAT FEATHERED LUMMOX! I HAVE NEED OF YOUR SERVICES! I INVOKE MY FINAL BOON! COME FORTH!"
A crashing, splintering sound like a forest being pushed over sounded, as a looming grey shape rather like a mountain formed into the cruelly beaked shape of a giant harpy eagle surged upright and cocked its head, fixing its tiny interlocutor with a dull gaze. It nodded, and unleashed a deafening, gravelly squawk as it spread a pair of stony wings a thousand hoofs across.
Al Miraj launched his carpet skyward and landed on the huge creature's jagged crest with a maddened cackle of glee. As the terrible roc took impossibly to the sky to the crackle of thunder and stone, the downdraft from its wings causing avalanches on the mountains below.
~~~
The pegasi adventurers soared over the dry majesty of the Mountains of the Gods, feeling the convection currents of heat rising from below and the cool blast of the high desert winds in their faces.
Daring looked thoughtfully over at her companion and called out to him. "So... I was thinking. We're down to one wish apiece. What are you thinking of doing with yours, Red?"
The stallion looked pensive, stroking his chin as his brow furrowed beneath the golden crest of his antique helmet. "Hmm. Well, I guess I'm gonna wish for some money."
She flicked an ear and rolled her eyes. "I guess I'm not surprised by that."
He kept his gaze fixed on the distant peak of their destination. "It's not how you think, Do. I've been trying to save up to start my own business. High speed deliveries, express mail and package delivery. The main reason I'm always broke is I try to squirrel away every bit I can into the my startup fund for RedEx, which is short for Red's Express which is what I'm gonna call my company."
They pumped their wings to gain a bit of altitude, passing over a windswept mountain peak, gliding down the other side as he continued. "A good shot of capital from our pal the genie should allow me to set up a lot sooner, without riskin' my neck all the time workin' as a courier or doin' stunt shows. Hire some fast flyers, show 'em the ropes, make sure them and the customers are well taken care of, and then see where the whole thing takes me."
Daring cocked her eyebrow. "Huh. Color me impressed, Red. I woulda thought you'd just wish for a million bits, blow it at the track the next day, and then be right back where you started."
He met her gaze. "Well, there's a lot you don't know when you don't bother to ask."
Before too much blush blossomed across her cheeks, he changed the subject. "What about you, Daring? What are you gonna wish for?"
She furrowed her brow beneath the brim of her pith helmet. "Huh... I dunno." After a few moments thought her face brightened with inspiration. "I guess maybe I'd wish for a map to all the coolest lost treasures in the world."
He gave her a wry grin. "You wouldn't just have him dump 'em all at your hooves?"
Daring rolled her eyes. "Where's the fun in that? The best part of treasure hunting is the travel and discovery. Once the stuff is found I'd rather turn it over to a museum so other ponies can enjoy it. All that old junk would just weigh me down otherwise."
Red let out a chuckle. "Okay, now that doesn't surprise me one little bit. You're one of a kind, Daring Do."
She gave him a fond smile in return. "Well, you're a lot more collectable than I gave you credit for, Red Glare."
Before he could reply, both ponies went silent as a shadow fell across them, accompanied by a massive disruption in the air strata above them that set the roots of their manes on end. Their gaze darted upward to behold the sun blotted out by the silhouette of a set of wings as wide across as the Fillydelphia Hippodrome, which folded against a gigantic body and dropped toward them with massive stony talons flared to strike and a vast hooked beak open wide and shrieking so loudly it felt as it the sky was cracking in half.
The two relatively tiny pegasi wheeled to evade with just enough speed to narrowly avoid being caught and crushed in the hurtling monster bird's claws, but were sent tumbling head over tail through the air by the turbulence it trailed from its jagged wings as it shot past them toward the mountain below. A tiny speck of yellow atop the stony creature's head squeaked and cackled and shook a tiny, fuzzy paw at Daring and Red as they struggled to reorient themselves.
The roc's talons clipped the mountain, causing the peak to crack and tumble down its side in fragments as it pumped its wings to wheel across the sky and climb for another pass at its targets, moving ponderously through the air like a vast galleon coming about at full sail to bear down on two tiny rowboats. Cyclones of dust were cast into the air at its passing.
From his perch on the monster's crest, Al Miraj was shrieking directions and clinging for dear life to the carpet with his claws. "YES! DESTROY THEM! I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE! GO FOR THE MARE! I HATE HER THE MOST! SWALLOW HER WHOLE! GRIND HER TO PASTE IN YOUR GULLET!"
Daring let out a whinny of terror as the roc's beak opened wide and rapidly rose toward her like an onrushing tunnel. She scrambled in the air with flailing hooves, desperately flapping her wings to gain attitude. A blur of ruddy chestnut and copper shot across her flight path, bearing her out of the way as the gaping, serrated maw slammed shut on empty air with a sound like a bomb going off.
She barely had time to register she was in Red's embrace, his freckled face smiling at her from behind the faceplate of his bronze helmet, before the monster bird's wing wash sent them tumbling into free fall with the horizon spinning like a pinwheel.
It was too fast. They were plummeting, and another deafening squawk sounded from above with a reedy cackle barely audible above it. The shadow fell across them again, along with the sharp increase in air pressure they both felt pounding in their ears as a mountain's worth of mass dropped toward them and compressed the sky between itself and their fragile little flesh and blood bodies.
Daring felt Red's foreleg tighten around her, as she heard him murmur in her ear. "Use... use my wish, sweetheart. Do it."
She caught up her half of the amulet and pushed it towards where she felt his half was waiting. It clicked together, and with the wind roaring around them they spoke in unison. "Kaboobie! Save us!"
An answering peal of thunder roared across the sky, and suddenly the two falling pegasi found themselves softly caught on a vast silken cushion. The booming voice filled their ears. "OH HO HO HO HO. IN TROUBLE AGAIN I SEE, MY LITTLE PONIES. JUST REST THERE FOR A MOMENT WHILE I SEE TO WHAT'S BEEN RUFFLING YOUR FEATHERS."
They looked around with wide, awestruck eyes to see the gigantic golden camel rising upward on his tawny wings, giving them a merry wink as he soared past. The roc's glassy eyes went wide as he rose to meet it in it's dive. "OH HO HO! I HAVE HEARD OF HITTING TWO BIRDS WITH ONE STONE, BUT NEVER OF TWO HITS ON A STONE BIRD!"
With that, massive boxing gloves appeared on his forelegs. He slammed the monster's beak shut in a spray of cracked stone feathers with a sweeping uppercut that sent the tiny yellow speck on the roc's crest high into the sky, and then slammed the other hoof down on the top of its head, dropping it into a tailspin toward the shattered mountain peak below. It smashed into the sandstone crag in a vast crumpled heap and tumbled onto its back with its wings and tail splayed and its hooked talons sticking up in the air like crooked masts from a wrecked ship.
Kaboobie floated down from above and landed gently beside it. A salt shaker the size of a castle tower appeared in a burst of golden sparkles in his upraised hoof, which he placed with a flourish on its jagged tail. "THAT OUGHT TO HOLD YOU FOR NOW, LITTLE BIRDIE, UNTIL I CAN RETURN YOU SAFELY TO YOUR NEST."
He glanced skyward, and casually crossed forelegs and hind legs in a nonchalant pose. After a few moments he glanced at his fetlock as if checking a watch, glanced up again, and held his wide hoof out to catch the tiny, screaming yellow speck as it dropped. He raised it to his eye level to scrutinize it with a cocked eyebrow.
Al Miraj huddled in a little ball in on the pad of Kaboobie's foot, shivering and cringing in stark terror, his ears pressing back against his head as the genie's booming voice washed over him. "OHO! I THOUGHT I'D KNOCKED A FLEA LOOSE FROM THE TINY FLEDGELING'S PLUMAGE. GREETINGS, O INFAMOUS AL MIRAJ. STILL THROWING ROCS AT MY LITTLE FRIENDS, EH? LET US SEE HOW YOU LIKE IT."
With that he blew a puff of smoke across his hoof as the evil bunny let out a squeal that cut off abruptly. When the sparkling mist cleared Al Miraj was a stiff stone statue of a one horned rabbit shrinking back in fear and dismay with wide, staring eyes. Grinning with satisfaction, Kaboobie tossed the petrified villain toward the distant dunes beneath the mountains with a casual flick of his hoof.
With a chuckle he wheeled to rejoin Daring and Red, who perched on the large, floating pillow with dumbfounded looks on their faces. He leaned in close with a broad smile lighting up his merry eyes. "OH HO HO. NOW YOU ARE SAFE, MY LITTLE PONIES. DO NOT BE TROUBLED ANY FURTHER ABOUT AL MIRAJ. PERHAPS SOMEDAY A WANDERER MAY CHANCE ACROSS HIM, AND HE WILL RECEIVE A PLACE OF HONOR IN A MUSEUM. AT LEAST NOW HE IS OUT OF YOUR HARE. HO HO HO HO."
Red gave him a grateful smile and a wave, trying not to roll his eyes at the pun. "Thanks, Kaboobie. That's another one we owe ya."
The genie gave a brief bow. "ON THAT NOTE, ALLOW ME TO SEND YOU ON YOUR WAY. WHILE I CANNOT DIRECTLY TRANSPORT THE AMULET, I CAN GET AWAY WITH HELPING YOU EASE YOUR WEARY WINGS FOR A LITTLE WHILE."
Daring settled in on the silk cushion with a sigh. "Thanks, Kaboobie. Don't mind if we do."
With that, the gigantic camel moved around behind them and gave a mighty beat of his wings, propelling the soft, floating platform rapidly over the mountain peaks. "FAREWELL, BRAVE ONES. REST WELL, AND LAND HAPPILY AT YOUR DESTINATION!"
Daring and Red lounged side by side and relaxed, as the scenery rolled past beneath them and dusk gathered on the horizon.
~~~
As night fell over the dunes, a cool wind whipped up from the Mountain of Anubis' foothills, blowing clouds of grit past a stone rabbit sunk up to its arched back in the sand.
A spark of deep purple energy crackled along the length of its single sharp horn, arcing and sparking as cracks appeared in its surface. The stone shell shattered like an eggshell and Al Miraj burst forth with a primal scream and feebly dragged himself up onto the crest of the dune.
His fur was gone, sloughed off with the stone and leaving him a shivering, scrawny little pockmarked pink thing with more than enough poisonous murder in his red rimmed, beady eyes to compensate for his otherwise pathetic appearance.
He hissed out two words through his sharp teeth, "Destroy... ponies...", and then scampered away into the night.
~~~
Daring and Red were well rested when the giant floating pillow began to ablate into the air beneath them with the first rays of the morning sun. They kicked off and took wing as their conveyance vanished into arabesques of gossamer.
The to pegasi soared effortlessly on the first rising thermals of the morning, smiling at one another fondly whenever their gazes met as they scanned the glorious, golden landscape below, their hearts as light as the distant clouds overhead.
Presently, they came upon the Seventh Mountain, a resplendent peak known as the Mountain of Ra. Wingtip to wingtip, they circled it in a rising spiral, seeking out any sign of the Seeress' remote aerie. On the mountain's sandy eastern flank, they spotted a modest compound, a small, walled in collection of mud brick huts surrounded by the lush greenery of a garden.
With a nod, the two pegasi came in for a landing at the front gate, which hung open and languidly creaked back and forth in the whistling mountain wind.
Daring cocked an eyebrow and stepped up to the opening, craning her neck to peer into the courtyard. "Hello? Is anypony home?"
She cast a quizzical look back at Red, who shrugged and nodded for her to enter. The two ponies walked cautiously into the courtyard, wary and silent as the only sounds that came to their laid back ears was the rustling of the leaves in the garden and the soft clucking of chickens somewhere nearby. Daring tried again. "Hello? We're looking for Henna Baba? Is she home?"
Red bobbed his head toward the largest hut ahead of them, which had stone brick steps leading up to the door. "I don't think the genie said anything about us needing to get a signature or something. We could just leave the amulet on her porch and take off."
Daring shook her head as they stood at the base of the steps and squinted into the hut's entrance with a hoof shading her eyes. "I dunno, Red. I'd kinda like some closure on this jaunt."
Their ears perked and their tails hiked in alarm as a raspy voice, dripping with hatred, sounded behind them. "As... would I."
As the two ponies wheeled to face their sinister assailant, rough, twisted thorn vines erupted from the ground, glowing with pulsing, fizzing purple magic, and formed a pair of cages around stallion and mare that separated them by over a pony length.
Sunburned and wretched, Al Miraj gritted his teeth and dug his claws into the ground, a grimace of madness animating his features. "Destroy… ponies..."
His twisted horn sputtered and sparked as the thorns inside the cages began to lengthen and thicken, digging into Daring and Red's sides as they yelped in pain and terror.
The pegasus adventuress yanked her half of the amulet off, snapping the chain, and stretched it toward her companion's cage, calling out to the stallion in desperation. "Eeagh! Red! Your amulet! We gotta call Kaboobie!"
He stretched his half back toward her. "Agh! Too far! Can't make it!"
She grimaced and pushed as hard as she could in spite of the sharp points threatening to pierce her as she pressed against them.
A hoof's width of space separated the zigzag edges of the two sides. Daring and Red cried out as the thorns dug in deeper and deeper while the unhinged horned rabbit hopped and cackled.
A piercing shriek echoed over the tiny compound.
Then silence. Al Miraj turned as a shadow fell across his twisted, bare little body, and cringed.
An impossibly wizened, elderly she-camel stood glaring at him over the thick bags beneath her eyes. A bottom tooth like a chisel blade jutted from her lower lip, and her sagging hump, heavily wattled neck, and all four legs were adorned with intricate, deep red floral designs.
She raised one of her decorated hooves and proceeded to viciously stomp on him, her voice hoarse and croaking like a raven's call. "UT! A naked mole rat! Disgusting! I will not abide such shameless vermin in my garden!"
Daring and Red were in an exceedingly painful predicament, but couldn't help but wince in sympathy as the villainous rabbit was flattened into the dust. The elderly camel spat on him for good measure, then ambled over to greet them.
She gave them a smile that revealed that her jutting tooth was the only one remaining in her mouth. "Salaam and good morning, o travellers, and welcome. I am Henna Baba of Ra. What brings you to my humble dwelling?"
The pegasus mare shifted a bit in her confinement, flinching and wincing as she proffered the half of the amulet she held in her shaking hoof. "Ow. Hi there. Ow. My name is... Ow. Daring Do. Ow. And this... Ow. Is my... Ow. My friend... Ow. Red... Ow. Glare."
The red headed stallion tried to give a winning smile in spite of the tears of pain rolling down his freckled cheeks. "Ow. Nice to... Ow. Meet you. Ow." He joined Daring in offering his half of the amulet as well.
Daring continued, shaking a bit as the thorns dug into some rather sensitive areas. "Ow... We're here to... Ow. return your amulet. Ow ow ow."
The elderly she camel's sunken eyes lit up as she took the halves into her hooves. "Aha! I wondered where those had gotten to."
She gave them another toothless grin. "My thanks, o ponies of the northern continent. Please, come and join me for some refreshment. I was just out gathering berries from the mountainside." She nodded to a basket hanging by a strap from her hump.
Daring tried to keep her voice level. "Th-thank you... Ow... ma'am. Ow. We'd be... Ow... honored... Ow."
Red was on the verge of passing out. "Not to... Ow. be a... Ow. bother, but... Ow. Could you maybe... Ow."
Understanding bloomed on Henna Baba's wrinkled face. "Oh yes, of course dearie." She clicked the amulet halves together. "Kaboobie? Be a dear and help these youngsters out please."
The winged camel popped into existence beside her in a puff of smoke, towering over her by mere hooves, and gave her a deep bow. "Oh ho ho ho. As you wish, madam."
A pair of hedge clippers appeared in the air beside him, and he stepped forward to release Daring and Red from their entrapment. A few moments later they stood free from the shriveling thorn branches, the small white X's of bandages dotting their bodies. They gave one another a weary smile and let out a sigh of relief.
The wizened camel seeress proceeded to herd them toward the entry of her hut. "Now come inside and have a seat. Come! Come! You are my honored guests. Come enjoy the sweet fruits of my garden and tell me of your travels. You are both so skinny. You must be fed!"
She craned her wattled neck past her shoulder and called out to her faithful genie. "Kaboobie, dear? When you've finished cleaning up out here, come inside and put the kettle on."
He gave her another bow. " Ho ho. As you wish, madam."
As the two pegasi and their she camel hostess disappeared into the hut, Kaboobie ambled over to the flattened form of Al Miraj, who groaned feebly and reached up with a shaking paw. The jovial genie peeled the horned rabbit off the ground and lifted him up by the nape of his neck pinched between the toes of a fore hoof.
He examined the shivering little wretch with a cocked eyebrow. "Oh ho ho ho. You're quite the persistent little sand flea. I see that I shall have to be more creative to get rid of you once and for all."
The ebullient genie sat back on his haunches, and a glossy black top hat appeared, upturned atop his free hoof. As the mystical camel dangled him over it, Al Miraj began to kick and writhe in his iron grip. "No! No! Anything but that! No! Nooo! Aieeee!"
Kaboobie dropped him into the hat without ceremony, the villainous magic rabbit's wail of dismay fading as if he were dropping a great distance into a void.
The genie let out a chuckle, and flattened the hat between his hooves, where it vanished with a small pop. His work done, he brushed off his hooves and sauntered inside to help prepare brunch.
~~~
High in the remote territories of Mooskatchewan, a lone bull moose sat atop a tree stump amongst the blue spruce and pine, practicing his act for the upcoming annual potluck and talent show over in Saskahoof. He wore a threadbare tailcoat, and held a battered top hat atop his broad hoof. With deliberate care he rehearsed his lines. "Nothin' up my sleeve!"
He tugged on said sleeve to demonstrate, accidentally tearing it entirely off. He blushed, making a mental note to stitch it back on later.
Then, with a flourish he reached into the hat. "Presto!"
The moose gawped in shock and horror as he produced a hideous, emaciated little pink thing with a sputtering black horn, wild glaring eyes, and gnashing fangs. "NeeYAAAAGH! UNHOOF ME, YOU DANK SMELLING UNGULATE!"
He hastily shoved the nasty little monster back down into his hat up to the pit of his foreleg, and gave a stunned look to a squirrel that was watching him intently from a nearby branch. "No doubt about it, I gotta get a new hat!"
~~~
Three days later Daring Do and Red Glare stood at the gate of Henna Baba's compound, well fed and well rested. They said their goodbyes to the wizened she-camel, and heartily thanked her winged genie servant.
Kaboobie stopped them with an upraised hoof as they turned to take wing. "Wait, my little ponies. Are you not forgetting something? Oh ho ho ho. I still owe you a wish."
The pegasi exchanged glances, and Red gave Daring a smile. "Well, we used mine up getting out from between that roc and a hard place. So I guess this one's all yours, babe."
She stifled a groan at the pun, and stroked her chin in thought. A sly grin spread across her muzzle and a blush upon her cheeks. "Well, it kinda strikes me that our meeting at the club would have turned out a lot better if it hadn't been interrupted by that rotten rabbit and his rowdies. So how about we try again?"
Red cocked an eyebrow. "What about that treasure map?"
She shrugged and gave him a fond smile. "I like it better when the treasures I find are a surprise."
Daring turned to the genie. "Kaboobie, I wish for Red and me to have a nice night out at the Palm Club in Marekesh." She gave the coppery maned stallion a wink. "And this time, Red's buying."
The winged camel threw back his head with a peal of laughter. "Oh ho ho ho ho ho ho ho! So be it!"
~~~
The band was in full swing, filling the heady, exotically spiced air with cool jazz in the haze of smoke and neon and the sparkle of jeweled lamps and twinkling, mosaic fountains. A stylish international crowd of ponies, arabian horses, camels, antelope, wildebeest, and zebra crowded the dance floor in a clatter of hooves like a driving rain.
Red sat at the mahogany topped bar next to Daring, who cut a svelte figure in her ruby sequined red dress, both ponies enjoying a sweet melon sherbet between them.
A tall bull camel bartender with a dark goatee leaned on the bar and gave them a warm smile. "Would sir and the lady like another?"
Daring spared him a glance, then smiled at Red and batted her eyelashes. "That was delicious, but I think what I want to do now is take a turn or two on the dance floor."
The pegasus stallion flared his wings and settled them across his tuxedo jacket. "Sure thing, beautiful. Let me settle up here."
With that, he reached into the pocket of his coat for his money. As he drew his hoof out, he looked down startled as the sound of a fountain of bits pouring forth and clattering on the tiled floor hit their ears. It continued for a few seconds, leaving a glittering pile on the floor at their hooves. Red and Daring stared in disbelief. With a tentative hoof, he reached into his pocket again and another gout of coins fell out with a musical jingle. Their eyes met, and they shared an elated smile.
Red turned to the bartender and dropped a hoof full of bits on the bar. "Here you go. Keep the change."
With that, the two pegasi trotted out into the crowd, kicking up their hooves in a lively tango.
The bartender leaned his chin on his hoof with a wry grin and chuckled to himself as he watched them dance.
The End.
Author's Note
This story is dedicated to: Alex Toth, Dave Stevens, Doug Wildey, William Hannah & Joseph Barbara
