What Happened to Discord?!

Chapters

What Just Happened?
Wondering
Pinkie can you babysit for me?
New Ages
BEHAVE OR FLUTTERBITCH WILL GET YOU
Dirty Dancing
Plot Twist
LOL WHAT
I'm on crack
Behold the References

What Just Happened?

"Hey, Twilight, so what's this new spell you're working on?" Spike asked.

"It's a time spell, so maybe I'll be able to turn something back in time or go forward and see the future," Twilight responded, studying a book. "I'm trying to write it myself, so maybe I could be in a history book one day!"

"Cool! Do you really think you'll be able to do it?"

"I'm sure, Spike. I just need to test it a few times, make sure I get it right."

"What are you going to test it on?"

"I'm planning to test it on an old tree."

"So that you won't hurt anything if it goes wrong?"

"Exactly!"

*******

Discord floated above Fluttershy, going unnoticed. This'll be great! Discord thought. She continued on towards Ponyville, humming.

"Ooh, these flowers look beautiful today!" Fluttershy admired, stopping to sniff them. Suddenly, glue shot out of the flower and over onto her. "Eek!" She stumbled back, but the glue dried quickly onto her and stuck her to the ground. "Hey!" Fluttershy looked up at the laughing spirit.

"Haha! That was pri-hi-cless! You should've seen the look on your face!"

""I'm gonna get you for this!"

"Ha, right!"

All day Discord had been pulling pranks on the ponies. Fluttershy was not his first. He had shrunk Rainbow Dash's wings, made Pinkies hair into actual cotton candy, frazzled Rarity's mane, turned Apple Jack's apples into hedgehogs, and now coated Fluttershy with glue!

"There he is, get em'!" Apple Jack yelled, coming from Ponyville with the others behind her, all except Twilight.

"Eek!" Discord shot off, followed by a stampede of angry ponies, who managed to get Fluttershy free. He sped towards EverFree, planning to hide.

"Okay, here I go!" Twilight shouted, her horn glowing, she pointed it at a huge tree. Discord shot past, just as Twilight's magic flashed out. The purple bubble enveloped Discord, suspending him in the air.

"Whoa! Twilight! I know I ran in front you, but can you put me down?" Discord asked, pounding on the bubble.

"Oh no!" Twilight gasped, her horn's glow intensifying. She fought to control the magic flow, but since it was her spell she was making she didn't have a clue how to stop. "Hold on!"

"Twilight! What are you doing?" Fluttershy screamed, looking at Discord enveloped in the magic bubble.

"I was practicing a new spell!"

"Don't worry, Discord, we'll get you out!" Fluttershy shouted.

"Well, could you make it fast? This is slightly irritating," Discord said. Suddenly the magic around Discord brightened, and he roared in pain.

"What's it doing to him?!" Apple Jack asked, yelling above the noise.

"I don't know!" Twilight cried. Discord shouts only got louder as the bubble started glowing even more. He was laying on the bottom of the bubble, his legs slipping out from under him. The magic that had a hold on the ponies he had pulled pranks on disappeared, and they were back to normal.

"Hey! My wings are back to original size! I can get him out!" Rainbow Dash shouted, and shot up towards the bubble. She kicked the bubble with her back legs, but they got sucked in by the magic. "Help!" Rainbow thrashed, trying to yank her back legs out of the bubble, when she felt someone grab them. "Don't drag me in there with you!" Discord pushed on her, sending her spilling out on to the ground. "He saved me!" The bubble pulsated different colors, and then, with a final flash, the bubble started to go back down to the ground.

"Discord?! Fluttershy yelled, running up to the now settling bubble. She waited as it came to a halt, and then the bubble burst with a bright flash. She removed her hoof from her eyes and stared at the thing before her. "Discord!? What happened to him!?" She was staring at a small, Discord laying on the ground.

"H-h-he's a.. Baby?!" Pinkie stuttered.

"What?!" Fluttershy grabbed the baby Discord and lifted him up to her face. "He really is a baby!"

"Oh my gosh! An age spell! I never knew I could do that! I mean, we faked it with Trixie, but I actually did it!" Twilight exclaimed. She seemed to snap to focus after her moment of excitement. "We need to get to Canterlot!"

"Will he be okay?" Apple Jack asked. Twilight shrugged.

"I have no clue."

"Your new spell did this, Twilight?" Celestia questioned, holding baby Discord up to her face.

"Yes! I can't believe it worked either!.." Twilight said, trailing off when baby Discord started crying.

"What's he crying about?" Apple Jack asked.

"You guys are so insensitive! He must be hungry!" Fluttershy told them, grabbing baby Discord and holding him to her. "You're just hungry, aren't you? Don't worry, Fluttershy will get you something to eat." She gently licked Discord's little head, right between his barely poking out horns. He quieted, grabbing Fluttershy's mane.

"How do you do that?" Rainbow asked, bewildered that she got him to quiet down.

"I guess she's good with him as a baby, too," Rarity whispered back.

"Princess, do you have any bottles?" Fluttershy wondered.

"No, but you can find some at the grocery. I have a meeting, so sadly I can't be of much service, but make sure you keep his magic contained. It's very unstable at this age. Now that I think, maybe we should think about what his age is?" Celestia said. "He looks about one. Have you tried to use a different spell to change him back to his actual age?"

"Well, no, but since it was my spell I don't think any other spell will work," Twilight sighed.

"Well, take care of him and see if any spells work. I need to go, bye girls," Celestia dipped her head, and left the room.

"We better go back to my cottage," Fluttershy said.

Fluttershy was alone at her cottage. Well, except for baby Discord. She had not yet fed him, but she was going into town for some things. She put Discord on her back and trotted into town. She walked along to the market. She stopped to get some baby food, bottles, and blankets. She was about to leave when she realized she still needed a crib. She quickly bought one and attempted to put in it her saddle bag.

"Hey, Twilight!" Fluttershy squealed, waving at Twilight from across the town square.

"Hey! How's baby Discord coming along?" Twilight asked.

"Good! I need you to do something for me, though."

"What?"

"Can you please teleport all this stuff safely to my cottage? It's really heavy, and I can't hold both him and the stuff at the same."

"Yeah, sure," Twilight said, Fluttershy's stuff disappearing in a flash of purple magic. "There you go!"

"Thanks! Hey, you want to come with me and help me get baby Discord settled in?"

"Sorry, Flutter, but I have to meet Spike at SugarCube Corner. I'll see ya later, though!"

"Okay, bye!" Fluttershy waved as Twilight walked away. She trotted back to her house and found her stuff sitting on the floor inside. She assembled the crib and put the groceries away. Fluttershy made the milk formula and walked over to where she had put Discord in the crib. "Okay, here you go." Fluttershy gently picked up Discord and put the bottle to his face. He grabbed it and stuck it in his mouth. He sucked vigorously, obviously starving. She cradled him in her elbow, and soon he started to fall asleep. After a few minutes, he was completely asleep, and she took the bottle from him. Fluttershy laid him down in the crib and kissed his forehead. He looked so cute sleeping, his tiny tail curled under the blankets. He barely had a neck, which was odd considering as an adult it was like three feet long. His tiny paws and wings made him look delicate, and the fluff on his tail was so silky. His mane was slightly ruffled, and his bangs, which were white, looked cute and odd at the same time, because his mane was black. I wonder when he lost his cute little bangs? His eyebrows were no where as big and bushy as when he was an adult.

Fluttershy sighed and went to bed.

Wondering

"Fluttershy?" Fluttershy? Are you home?" Rainbow called, opening her door open a crack.

"I'm in here!" Fluttershy replied, her voice oddly muffled.

"What?"

"In here!"

"Oh, okay." Rainbow flew into the cottage, and saw Fluttershy with baby Discord in her mouth, attempting to get him in the bath. He was squealing, kicking his little feet as he tried to get away. "Geez, what is going on?"

"He won't-" Fluttershy was cut off when Discord kicked her in her face. She grabbed him in her hooves and tried to stick him in, but he clung to her.

"Need a little help?" Rainbow asked.

"That would be most helpful, Rainbow, thanks," Fluttershy said, grunting as he struggled. Rainbow grabbed Discord, and Fluttershy pushed him down into the tub. Discord wailed as Fluttershy poured water on him and scrubbed his back with some soap. Rainbow held him down and he tried to bite her.

"Hey! Stop trying to bite me, you brat!" Rainbow shouted, yelping as Discord nipped her, but didn't break the skin.

"No! You don't bite ponies! You naughty boy!" Fluttershy scolded. Discord stuck his tongue out at her and Fluttershy gasped. "You're gonna be in big trouble if you don't stop!" Discord continued to wail and kick out. She furiously scrubbed him, and when she was done she lifted him out of the tub and put him in a warm towel. He glared out at them. "Uh, all done!" Fluttershy looked up at Rainbow, who was watching her. "So, what did you need?"

"Oh, yeah, um, the girls and I were going to the park. We were wondering if you wanted to come, and you could bring your little...thing," Rainbow explained.

"Thing!? Oh well, yes I'll come, just let me get him ready."

"Okay, meet ya there!" Rainbow flew toward the door, and left a trail of rainbow streaks.

"Oh, boy. Oh well, come on Dissy, let's get you ready." Fluttershy grabbed the diapers and sat him down on the table. She dried him off, making his fur stick out everywhere, and put his diaper on. "Let's go!" She put Discord on her back and they left.

**********

"Hey, Flutters! You made it!" Pinkie yelled, shoving a cupcake in her mouth.

"Hi girls!" Fluttershy waved at them.

"Ah, can I hold him?" Pinkie asked, coming up to her.

"Sure." Pinkie grabbed baby Discord from her back and held him up to her face.

"Hi! Hi! Hi! You are so cute! I like you as a baby! Fluttershy, you should keep Discord as a baby, he's sooooooo cute!" Pinkie said, rubbing her nose to Discord's.

"I don't know... What if he knows and he wants to be adult again? I can't do that to him!" By now, the other ponies were cuddling with baby Discord, and he was just sitting there wagging his tail.

"Look who's a cute little thing!" Rarity cooed, scratching his chin. He rolled onto his back and wiggled, and they all reached out to rub his belly.

"Fluttershy! But look how cute he is! Can't we keep him like this!?" Pinkie squealed.

"He is pretty cute... But we don't even know if he'll ever be able to be an adult again. We should at least try. " They played with Discord until Pinkie got an idea. Pinkie handed him one of her extra-sugar cupcakes. "Pinkie! No! Don't feed him that!" Too late. Discord grabbed it in his little paws and sniffed it, shoving it in his mouth right before Fluttershy could grab it. "Oh boy..." Discord's eyes widened. Suddenly he started glowing, making the ponies jump back. He disappeared in a flash of gold. "Where did he go?!" Fluttershy looked like she was having a panic attack. She ran around, hyperventilating, and checking everywhere.

"How-? How did he do that? I thought he wouldn't be able to use it!?" Apple Jack stammered.

"The Princess did say his magic would be unstable. He could be anywhere!" Twilight fretted. Meanwhile, Fluttershy was sitting on the ground, breathing into a bag. A sudden flash behind her made them all look.

"D-Discord! You came back!" Fluttershy raced up to him, where he was sitting on the ground rather shocked looking, and picked him up, kissing his head and hugging him. He squirmed,trying to get free.

"Hm, so I guess after that, it's sugary stuff that sets his magic off," Twilight predicted.

"So I can't let him have sweets?" Fluttershy asked.

"No sweet things!? You guys must be crazy to think he won't get sweet sugary food! I mean, if I foal sit him, and I will because he is so cute, he'll defiantly get junk food!" Pinkie exclaimed.

"Pinkie, I'm not sure you should look after him," Rarity said.

"Whatever, I'm just so glad he didn't teleport to like the middle of a desert or the EverFree Forest!" Fluttershy put in, squeezing Discord closer. He squirmed, and she put him on the ground.

"Definitely. But we should probably document this," Twilight said. When given questioning glances by her friends, she smiled sheepishly. "What I mean is that we should write about him as a baby. Like, what makes his magic go off. Then, maybe it'll come in handy one day."

"Oh, I get it. Like a journal, right?" Rainbow Dash asked. Twilight nodded.

"Okay. I'll do it," Fluttershy agreed.

"Good. Here, take this," Twilight told her, conjuring a bright orange journal in front of her, along with a brilliant green plumed quill. She set the quill on the yellow pegasus's ear and put the journal in her hoof. 'Discord' was written across the top in dark blue.

"Thanks Twilight. I'll do it right now." She took the quill from her ear and opened the journal to the first page. She scribbled down what they had just learned and closed it.

"Can you take your baby now?" Dash asked, shaking the small spirit off her tail, which he had been playing with (rather adorably). Fluttershy took him and held him in her lap.

"Well, are we going to continue with our picnic?" Pinkie asked.

"Nah, I gotta run. Lots a weather stuff to do. See ya girls!" Dash flew off, disappearing into the reddening sky.

"I should probably get back to Spike. He doesn't really like it when I'm home late," Twilight said. She turned around and walked over the hill.

"I'm going to go too. Discord is getting tired," Fluttershy said, rocking the spirit in her arms. He yawned widely, his eyes closing.

"Ah, he's ssssoooo cute! I wish you could stay! Bye you guys!" Pinkie yelled. Fluttershy set baby Discord on her back and left.

*****

"So Twilight, have you figured out a spell that will change Discord back into an adult yet?" Fluttershy asked, hoping the unicorn would be almost there. Discord was sitting in her lap.

"No, sorry. But, I think I may be on the verge of a breakthrough!" the purple unicorn announced.

"You are!? How!?"

"Well, it was my spell that did that to him. So, all I need to do is figure out a counter spell. Usually, counter spells are just the words said backwards, but they can also be in a different order. The challenge of finding one is almost always harder than the actual spell. There are so many different ways to do it, many spells don't even have a counter spell. But I've been working on it ever since changing him, and I think I may have figured it out. In the course of only a few more months, I should be done with the counter spell."

"A few months!? Twilight, I don't think I can look after him that long. He is the god of chaos. He doesn't belong as a baby. In right, he's thousands of years old. You have to find a counter spell faster than that!" Fluttershy argued, pulling her face away from the baby draconequus as he played with her hair. He kept persisting, trying to grab her mane. She gave him an angry look.

"I'm sorry Fluttershy, but finding counter spells are difficult. Even if I work nonstop for a month, that won't be enough. It takes skills and perseverance to get a counter spell," Twilight said firmly, turning around to pull a few books off the shelves with her magic. She held them in front of herself. "If you need, I can try and find a book about spirits for you. I'm sure you could learn something about him that way."

"I guess that could help. Maybe with that kind of thing I can try and discover what he likes to do. So far, though, he seems to do normal baby things. Like annoy me by trying to pull my hair." Fluttershy smacked his little lion paw lightly, barely more than a tap. He yanked it away and looked up at her, his eyes going big and watery. "Oh no, I'm sorry, don't cry! Please?" Too late. Baby Discord burst into tears, his high-pitched wails making the ponies cringe. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Sh, sh, it's okay.. It's okay.." Fluttershy rocked him in her arms, trying to calm him down.

"What's that sound?! I'm trying to sleep!" The growl of an annoyed dragon sounded from upstairs.

"It's just Discord, Spike!" Twilight called back.

"Make him stop then! This is my day off and I want to sleep in for once!" Grumbling, the little dragon curled up and went to sleep again.

"Please stop crying! I didn't mean to hurt you! Please?" Fluttershy continued rocking the baby spirit, but he showed no signs of stopping. Suddenly, behind them, a pink pony's head popped out from a plant, dirt covering her mane.

"Hiyah girls! Here, I can help him!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed, jumping the rest of the way out of the plant, taking Discord from Fluttershy and holding him in one arm. She reached over, and from practically nowhere, she produced a sack of flour, dumping it on her head. The baby draconequus stared at the pony that now looked like a ghost. He leaned his head forward and sniffed her. Then, he jerked back, sneezing flour out of his nose. Discord pressed his paw into her, then taking it away, seeing his paw print left in the flour. Meanwhile, Pinkie was just smiling, seeing her plan working. The spirit started laughing, and then buzzed his tiny mismatched wings excitedly.

"Thanks Pinkie! I don't know how I could've gotten him to stop all by myself!" Fluttershy breathed, taking the now flour covered Discord away from the party pony.

"Just part of my job! See, I am a great foal sitter! I can handle him!"

"What were you doing in that plant?" Twilight asked, rather confused, but knowing at the same time Pinkie probably didn't even know where she was and that she was just being Pinkie Pie.

"I have nnnooo idea! Bye!" Pinkie bounced out of the library, leaving Twilight nodding, hearing exactly what she had been expecting to hear.

"Okay, well, that was random, but at least Discord's not crying anymore," Fluttershy said, bouncing the baby on her knee.

"Yeah. So, I'll find a book about spirits really quick so I can get to my counter spell," Twilight said, heading towards the bookshelves. "Uh, where would I find a book like that?" Turning around, she inspected the books around her. A book flew at her, and she quickly grabbed it with her magic before it hit her in the face. "What the?! Where'd you come from?!"

A distant voice called. "It was under 'Eeeee!'"

"Oh." Twilight lowered her ears. She perked up and looked at the cover.

"Everything you Need to Know About Spirits"

"Okay, here it is. Thanks to Pinkie Pie." Twilight lowered it into the yellow pegasus's hooves. "Anyway, I need to get started."

"Okay, thanks Twi. We'll get out of your mane now," Fluttershy said, then set Discord on her back and put the book in her saddlebags. She turned to Twilight, but already found her intently reading a book. The pegasus rolled her eyes and giggled.

**********

"The draconequus is a complicated creature. They have the head of a horse, a deer antler, a goat horn, one long fang, different sized pupils, a snake tongue, a goat beard, and white bushy eyebrows. They have an arm of a lion, an arm of an eagle, a leg of a lizard, and a leg of a goat. They have a bat wing and a pegasus's wing, a horse's mane, and a dragon like snake's tail with a white tuft. The shape of their bodies resembles that of a snake.

"Little is known about their history, only a few small things. They did not come from Equestria naturally, but originated in a faraway land, the name of it is unknown. When their world was destroyed, a few survivors took refuge in different places. No pony knows for sure where all the others went, as the information was lost in history.

"Only one is left in Equestria. The name of this spirit is Discord. He was turned to stone by Princess Celestia and Princess Luna.

"As an infant, draconequus are very unstable. Their magic is set off by the smallest changes in the environment. An increase in energy will often trigger random magic bursts. When in the first few years of life, a baby draconequus is not immortal. It will take up to ten years for one to develop its immortality.

"These spirits will grow at the same speed as ponies, but after a while, will not grow at all, and just age. They are immortal, and are extremely powerful. They are the most powerful spirits, but are not the biggest by far. Only towering about seven to ten feet, the tallest probably being around fifteen feet. They can weigh up to three hundred pounds, but usually are only one hundred. They can float without flying, and their magic works best when they snap their fingers, or at least use their paws. Without doing that, only a few simple things can be accomplished."

Fluttershy thought about what she had just read. The information about them wasn't that long, only a a little more than half a page, as a picture of a draconequus, Discord, to be more specific, was taking up part of it. He looked like he was younger, much before the Princesses turned him to stone. He was laying on his stomach in the air with a smirk on his face, his paw under his chin, his mane spiking up farther than it had, and a little falling over his eyes. He was definitely younger. Much younger. The pegasus looked more closely at the picture. He didn't even have a full beard yet! Just a goatee, coming into a point on his chin. His eyebrows were not as bushy, and he seemed...shorter. In fact, his deer antler looked like it was in the process of budding, much like an actual deer's, and his goat horn was just starting to twist. His pegasus wing only had four feathers showing at the ends, instead of how many he used to have, much like hers and Rainbow Dash's.

The thing about magic bursts when they were infants made sense, as Discord had eaten a cupcake. And now she knew Discord had not even come from Equestria! And still, he wasn't even immortal yet.

"Wow, so different. I'll definitely ask about how old Discord is in this picture next time I see Celestia. And how did they get this picture anyways? I'm starting to wonder..." Fluttershy closed the book, thinking about Discord's past. What was he like? She glanced over at him, where he was asleep under her wing. She twisted her neck, kissing him on his head.

"Goodnight, my little spirit."

Pinkie can you babysit for me?

Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.

It kept coming. Fluttershy desperately tried to block out the noise. It was four in the morning, and she was exhausted. So far, after only two weeks with Discord, she was ready to give up. The baby spirit was becoming more of a challenge, often staying up all night and sleeping half the day. He was also learning to unsheathe his claws on his paw, meaning that she got a new scratch everyday. He had even managed to fly a little bit. She had thought it would be months before he even got off the ground. Boy, was she wrong!

Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.

Fluttershy put her pillow over her head, groaning.

Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.

Sighing, the yellow pegasus sat up in bed. She scooted out and went down to Discord's room. As soon as she opened the door, he stopped kicking the side of his crib and sat up. He jumped, hovering in the air for a few seconds before plopping back down into the blankets. Fluttershy reached down and picked the spirit up, much to his delight. He laughed, wagging his tail.

"Uh, I love you Discord, but can't you sleep at night? You did when you were an adult," Fluttershy murmured, rocking him. He didn't listen and just latched onto her hair, much to her annoyance. She pulled it back, and put the spirit back into bed, hoping he could just sleep for once. Closing the door as she left, the exhausted pegasus crawled back into her bed.

Crying jerked her from sleeping.

"Uuuuhhhhh."

******

"Twilight, have you had a successful time?" Fluttershy asked desperately.

"No, Fluttershy. I told you, this is a very difficult process. It will probably be a while. But I'm trying," the purple unicorn responded, her horn glowing as she held a book up to her face. She glanced up at the pegasus. Dark rings circled her eyes, her mane was messy, and she really just looked as if she hadn't slept in days. "Oh! You look awful!" Twilight rushed forwards, dropping the book on the floor, and an annoyed Spike grabbed it.

"I haven't gotten any sleep at all. Discord is becoming an active baby. He's just not sleeping at night. He stays up, and then sleeps during the day. To make it worse, he can use his claws now, and is already starting to fly! I thought he'd be just like a pony baby, but he's not!" Fluttershy explained, while Twilight picked up Discord with her magic.

"Hmm, maybe you should take a break. One of us girls could look after him while you get some rest."

"Oh, that would be great. Who should we ask?"

"Well, I can't, because of finding a counter spell, and obviously, having Discord around would slow down my progress. But, I'm sure some pony will take him off your hooves for a day or two."

"Maybe Pinkie Pie could? Her high energy would be perfect for Discord! She's wanted to look after him the most, and this would be the perfect opportunity for her to. In fact, I'll go ask her right now."Fluttershy stood up, took Discord from Twilight, and set out the door to find her friend, who was undoubtably at SugarCube Corner.

"Hiyah Fluttershy! What're you doing?" Pinkie asked, jumping out of nowhere, and scaring the pegasus.

"Oh my goodness, Pinkie! You scared me!" Fluttershy exclaimed, almost dropping Discord, who was clinging onto her head.

"Sorry! I just saw you walking to SugarCube Corner from my window, so I had to go say hi before you went inside!"

"But you live at SugarCube Corner."

"I know, but I saw you coming! What fun would it be to just wait for you?"

"Well, I guess you have a point. Anyways, I had to ask you something."

"What is it?"

"Would you babysit Discord for a day or two? He's getting really active, and I'm not getting any sleep."

"Of course I can look after him! I'm sure that we'll have a great time!"

"Oh, thank you so much, I'm so glad you can. Now, he is starting to use his claws, and he can fly a little bit, so you'll want to be careful of that. And here's the journal, in case you need to write something down." Fluttershy took the journal from her saddlebags and handed it to Pinkie.

"Okie dokie lokie! I'll take good care of him Fluttershy! You go get some sleep!"

"Thanks Pinkie Pie! Let me know if he's any trouble." The pegasus spread her wings and flew off to her home, leaving Discord with Pinkie. She looked away from where Fluttershy had just left. The spirit was settled in her fluffy mane atop her head.

"So Discord, what do you want to do?" Pinkie asked him. He looked down at her quizzically. "Oh, right, I bet you can't talk yet. Well, I know what we should do! Let's go to SugarCube Corner!" The pink pony bounced down the street, with the baby spirit jiggling in her mane. She entered the sweet shop, and took Discord to the kitchen.

"Hello Pinkie Pie! Oh, who's this?" Mrs. Cake asked, seeing the baby draconequus in the pony's hair.

"This is Discord! He was the one that turned the world all crazy, remember? He's been in here before."

"Oh, yes, but he wasn't a baby.."

"Oh, right! Yeah, he got caught in the crossfire of Twilight's spell. It changed him into a baby. Fluttershy has been taking care of him, but she's really tired so she asked me to look after him for a few days, while she rests. He won't be any trouble, I promise! He loves me!" Pinkie declared.

"Okay, as long as he's well behaved, I suppose. Is he, um, potty trained?"

"I have no clue. He wears a diaper, so I don't think so. Fluttershy would've said something about that."

"Okay. But make sure he doesn't make a mess. We've already got two other foals to take care of." Mrs. Cake went into the other room.

"Okay! Got it! He won't be any trouble. Now, come on Discord! Let's have some fun!" Pinkie Pie went to the cupboard. "Why don't I show you how to make cupcakes! It'll be great!" She got out the necessary ingredients. She took Discord from her mane and out him on the counter to watch. "Okay, first you get your ingredients. Then, you put them in a bowl. Here, why don't you do that?" She pointed to them. Discord looked at her, wondering what he was supposed to do. "Take the flour, and put it in there." He grabbed the flour with his little paws and tried to dump it in there, only succeeding to make a mess on the floor. "Oh, don't worry about it little guy! No pony gets it right on their first time! My first time was a disaster!" He looked back at the ingredients, and concentrating, picked it up with his magic to pour the water into the bowl. He put the rest of the ingredients in there. "Wow! That was really good! I didn't know you could use your magic like that yet!" Pinkie exclaimed, smiling. She picked up the spoon and mixed, poured it into the cupcakes tin, and then put them in the oven. "Now, we gotta wait. But, waiting's boring so we're going to go do something else until they're done." She let him hop back into her mane and they left the kitchen.

*****

Fluttershy was snuggled into her bed. She had been sleeping for a while now, ever since dropping Discord off with Pinkie. She was starting to wake up. Yawning, she flipped the covers off herself. What a great rest!

"I haven't slept like that in days," Fluttershy said to herself, stretching. She clambered out of bed, feeling refreshed, and went into the kitchen. As she made herself breakfast, she noticed the book about spirits she had gotten from Twilight. Opening it, she went to the page about draconequus. She looked at the picture of Discord again, still curious to know how old he was in that photo. "Hmm, I think I'll go to Canterlot today. I'm going to ask the Princess about that picture." Fluttershy ate a sandwich, then put the book in her saddlebags and headed out the door.

******

"Princess, there is somepony here to see you," a guard said, opening the door a crack.

"Send them in," Celestia told the guard, signing one last document before tossing it onto a pile. She looked up as Fluttershy came into the room. "Fluttershy! What a nice surprise!"

"Hello, Princess Celestia," the pegasus responded, bowing slightly before getting closer to her.

"What brings you here to Canterlot today?"

"Um, well, I, uh, had a few questions..."

"Oh? About what?"

"Well, Twilight gave me this book about spirits, and there's this picture of Discord, and I was wondering how old he was in it..." Fluttershy quietly nudged the book over to the Princess, opened to the page it was on.

"My, my, I haven't seen this photo in years!" Celestia studied it for a few moments. "Looks just the same as when Luna took it..."

"Pardon? Luna took that picture?"

The Princess lifted her head from the book, forgetting that the pegasus was actually in here. "Oh, yes, she did."

"Do you know how old he was in it?"

"Hmm, let's see..." Celestia removed the photo from the casing that it was in, surprising Fluttershy, who had not known it was there. She unfolded the edges, where it was turned it. It revealed that Princess Celestia, as a young filly, was in the picture, looking sternly up at the spirit of chaos as he floated above her. She flipped it over. "Ah-ha! Found it. Luna took this picture when I was seven, and Discord was around two hundred. So, this was taking about, give or take, four thousand years ago."

"F-four thousand! He's over four thousand years old? So you're like four thousand years old too?!"

"Yes, of course. I was two thousand when Luna and I were the only Princesses. But, Discord overthrows me, and sends the land into eternal chaos and unrest. Luna and I cast him to stone. Over two thousand years goes by. I sent Luna to the moon. That was another thousand years. So, technically, Discord and I, are over five thousand years old, really. He was always older than me. And Luna was around two hundred years younger than me. So, all of this fits together quite nicely."

Fluttershy was gaping. She had been taking care of a spirit that was over five thousand years old, and she didn't even know it! Of course, she had known he was old, but she hadn't thought he was that old.

"So, I have another question," Fluttershy said.

"Yes?"

"Well, Discord can already use magic, fly, and he can use his claws. Is that normal?"

"Discord isn't normal, that's the fact. Chaotic and not making any sense, he was doing things regular ponies shouldn't be able to do even when they are a few years old. It's just how he is."

"Also, is he supposed to be nocturnal?"

"Nocturnal? What do you mean?"

"He stays up all night, sleeps a lot during the day.."

"Oh, babies are babies, no matter what species." Celestia laughed, and Fluttershy did too. "So, have I answered all your questions?"

"Yes, I think so," Fluttershy said, smiling.

******

"Where's Pinkie Pie? Here she is! Where's Pinkie Pie? Here she is!"

Discord squealed in delight as the pink pony played with him. As a silly of a game this was to an adult, to the baby it was a whole lot different. A draconequus was no exception.

"Okay, what should we do now?..." Pinkie looked around. They had already tried the slide. Discord hated it. For what reason, she didn't know. And when playing on the swing, the spirit just let himself go! He had ended up in a tree, a bush, and in some pony else's stroller. Scaring the unsuspecting pony half to death. It was then that Pinkie realized Discord would keep doing that. Seesaws, no, mare-i-go-round, no way... The pink pony thought about what to do next. Everything they had done, he would end up doing wrong, getting scared, or getting himself hurt. So, the park was done for.

"Maybe we should go back to SugarCube Corner. I'm sure the cupcakes are done by now," Pinkie said. She let the spirit climb back into her mane and they set off for the sweet shop. When they went inside, Pinkie got the cupcakes out of the oven. She put Discord on the counter next to them, turned around to get some icing, and when she looked back, the cupcakes were gone. "Discord! Did you eat all of those?!"

A burp signified he did.

"Oh no! I wasn't supposed to let you have sweets in the first place!" Pinkie bit her lip. "Calm down Pinkie, he doesn't even look like he's about to get all magic crazy on you! Maybe it'll all work- oh no he's gone!" A few small twirls of gold told her that Discord had teleported in his sugar rush. "Quick! Need to find him!" She frantically searched the kitchen. She ran outside, thinking he could be there.

"Look! There's a baby stuck on that roof!" Lyra shouted, pointing up at the top of a house. Pinkie's eyes boggled out of their sockets as she saw him, crawling about. Pulling her party cannon out of absolutely nowhere, she stuck a helmet on her head and jumped into it. She launched herself at the roof, and as she went flying over it, she reached out and grabbed Discord. Wiping her forehead off with a sigh of relief, she closed her eyes. When she opened them, they were over the lake.

"Aahh!" Pinkie ran in midair, trying to get them away. She fell into the water with a splash. The pony resurfaced, spitting water out in fountains. Discord hovered above her, never having hit the water. He laughed, waving at her. She snorted, pulling some seaweed off her head. Grumbling, the pink pony swam to shore. She shook herself dry, her mane frizzing up even more than normal. She plucked the spirit out of the air, to his dismay, and set off for SugarCube Corner.

"You need to behave now, Dissy! I can't have you running all willy-nilly everywhere! You could've been hurt," Pinkie Pie scolded the draconequus, making him pout and cross his arms. "Why don't we put you down for a nap?" Discord shook his head. "No, I think you should take a nap." Pinkie walked up the stairs to her room and laid him down in a crib. "Wait, where did this crib come from? I don't remember putting this here." She inspected it, then shrugged her shoulders. "Don't question the world!" The pink pony patted Discord's head and turned off the light, then closed the door. He remained silent for a few moments before bursting into tears. Pinkie shot back into the room. "Don't cry! I'm here! Auntie Pinkie is here!" She grabbed him and rocked him in her arms a little. He didn't stop. "Oh, I know!" She set him down, ran off, then came back again with a bag of flour. She dumped it on herself. Discord started laughing. "That's what I like to see! Now, why don't you go to sleep for a little while?" Pinkie smiled, putting her now white hooves on the edge of the crib. He yawned, curling up. She sighed, then left the room. Again.

*******

I wonder how Pinkie is doing? Fluttershy thought while flying down to Ponyville. I should probably go pick him up.

The yellow pegasus headed to SugarCube Corner. She went inside, and saw Pinkie standing at the counter.

"Hi Pinkie Pie. Where's Discord?" Fluttershy asked.

"Oh, he's upstairs taking a nap," Pinkie Pie told her, smiling.

"Was he good for you?"

"He was an angel!... In a hell angel type of way."

"Oh no, he was bad wasn't he?"

"No, well, sorta, but I fixed it. Just a little incident with some cupcakes…a roof…a lake..."

"Oh, did everything work out okay though?"

"Yup! We had a blast! By the way, he hates slides, so don't let him near one."

"Um, okay... Can I see him?"

"Yeah sure! Just follow me upstairs!" Pinkie bounced up the steps, with Fluttershy behind her. They entered her room and she saw Discord sleeping soundly. Occasionally he would kick or snort.

"Oh, he looks so cute! I don't know how you do it Pinkie, but you're so good with kids! You can make them do anything. Thanks. I think I'll take him back to my place now, since he's been with you all day."

"Okay Flutters! Why don't you wake him up? I have to get back to the register," Pinkie said, turning around and bouncing back downstairs.

Wondering how to wake him up without him crying, Fluttershy watched him sleeping. In a not creepy at all sort of way. She gently tapped his stomach, and he snorted, blinking open his eyes.

"Hi Discord. We're going to go home now, okay?" she said. He just yawned. She picked him up and set him on her back, uncurling her wings. She hovered above the ground for a few moments before going out the window. Discord climbed to the top of her head. "Be careful. I don't want you falling off, now do I?" He laughed and laid down in her mane.

******

"So, how is Discord?" Luna asked.

"Fluttershy told me he was getting more active," Celestia replied.

"Interesting. Did she have him with her?"

"No."

"Oh."

"But you'll never guess what she asked me today."

"What?"

"You know that picture you took, when Discord had just flipped the castle upside down?"

"Oh, she didn't!"

"Yes, she did! She totally asked me how old he was in that picture! I was surprised to see it again."

"I wish I were there. I miss that picture; mostly the look on your face and how young you two look... Things were better back then, weren't they?"

"Yes. When Discord was not the evil mastermind, and he was nice."

"At least he is reformed now."

"He never should have had to be reformed! He was nice before! He should've stayed that way..."

"Do not fret, dear sister, I'm sure that your most faithful student will turn him back to an adult. And then we can laugh at how he is reformed!"

"Oh, Luna, what would I do without you?"

New Ages

"No! Come back here, you naughty little-" Fluttershy went flying head over hooves, landing in a pile of bird seed. Discord floated above her, laughing innocently. The yellow pegasus looked up and groaned loudly, then fell face first into the feed. She did not want to get up. At all. It was so much work, taking care of the Spirit of Chaos. All he did was, well, cause chaos.

Like today.

Just earlier. . .

It had been around noon, and Fluttershy had decided to get Discord into the bathtub, as he had not had one in a few days.

"Okay Discord, you're gonna have a nice, warm bath before we go see Applejack today, okay? Then she can see how cute you look," Fluttershy said softly to the still slightly groggy draconequus settled in her mane. He had been asleep.

Thinking it would be an easy task, the pegasus quickly filled the tub with warm water and added the bubbles, placing Discord on the ground in the mean time.

But he had a different idea in mind.

While Fluttershy's attention was on making sure the water wasn't too hot, Discord ran out of the room. When Fluttershy turned around, she immediately face-hoofed, wondering why she had not kept an eye on the baby spirit, and went looking for him.

"Discord, please come out! We don't have time for this!" Fluttershy called, checking under the couch for the fifth time. She let out a little whine, dancing on her hooves nervously. Applejack was expecting her at one and it was almost a quarter away. She didn't want AJ to think she blew her off and did something else and think she wasn't her friend.

"Please Discord? We really, really, really, need to get you in the tub to make it to Sweet Apple Acres!" Fluttershy whined, sticking her bottom lip out in a pout. (Ha!) Realizing she was getting nowhere, she collapsed on the floor, covering her face with her hooves. I'm never going to be a competent parent! she thought to herself miserably. Suddenly, she heard laughter right next to her. She peeked out between her hooves and saw Discord right in front of her.

"Discord! You're here! We need to hurry and get you in the tub!" Fluttershy reached out and grabbed the spirit, much to his dismay, and fluttered her wings, getting them to the bathroom. She placed him in the water and started to vigorously scrub him with a rag covered in shampoo. He growled and tried biting her, but she had gotten used to it and they were finished in only a few minutes.

"Okay, now let's go! No more shenanigans!" Fluttershy set Discord on her back and opened her wings, shooting a glance at the clock on the wall. She gasped. "We only have two more minutes until one! Hold on!" She soared off into the sky, flapping her wings as fast as they would go. (Which really, was not very fast). Thankfully, Sweet Apple Acres was not very far from her house, as they were both near the EverFree Forest. The pegasus landed carefully on the ground, and Applejack approached her.

"Howdy Fluttershy! On time, as usual, Ah see," AJ said. Fluttershy nodded, trying to catch her breath from the not-so-fast flight to get there.

"Well, thanks, Applejack. Now, what is it that you needed help with?" she asked.

"Y'see, there's this family of mice in mah barn, and they're eatin' all the grain we got. It'd be a real lifesaver if ya could get them outta there." The orange earth pony pointed one hoof at the barn.

"Of course. I'll go talk to them." Fluttershy trotted over to the barn, opening the large red doors and going inside. She made sure to go quietly, as to not scare the mice. She clicked her tongue softly, trying to draw them out.

"Little mice, would you please we kind enough as to come out?" the pegasus asked gently. A small scratching was heard, and then two mice heads popped out. They twitched their whiskers, emerging from the wall. They approached Fluttershy cautiously.

"Oh, thank you little friends. I just wanted to ask if you and your family would like to come back with me to my cottage. We have plenty of food and space for you. You see, my friend needs this grain in here to help her family, and she doesn't like you eating it."

The mice twitched their whiskers again, then turned to each other. They squeaked something between them, and looked over at Fluttershy. The larger one- the male, Fluttershy knew- nodded.

"Oh, thank you! Now, why don't you get your family, and I can escort you to my-"

"Rawr!" Discord shouted right in the mice's faces. They squeaked in terror and ran off, hiding once again in the walls. Fluttershy tried to say something to stop them, but they were already gone. The pegasus bit her lip, trying to contain her anger. One of her eyes twitched. Meanwhile, Discord was running around in a circle, laughing.

"Discord! Why would you do that?! Now they won't come to my cottage!" Fluttershy exclaimed, stomping her hooves. Discord stopped, and looked up at the angry yellow pony. She was glaring daggers at him, not even knowing what she was doing until it happened- the stare.

The spirit sat there, transfixed by the stare for a moment before jumping back up and sitting on Fluttershy's back. She stopped, giving a content sigh. She didn't know if he was listening to her because of the stare or if he just knew she was angry with him, but it didn't matter right now. Fluttershy headed out of the barn, still slightly angry that the mice were now scared, and went up to Applejack.

The earth pony turned away from Granny Smith to look at her pal. "So, how did it go? Are they gonna leave?"

Fluttershy rubbed the back of her head nervously. "Well, you see. . ."

Applejack's smile fell. "It didn't work?"

"Um, it was about to, but then, um, um, uh. . ."

"Get on with it partner."

"Discord scared them."

AJ didn't say anything. She just stared blankly at her friend. After a few moments she finally said something. "Well, if it ain't too much of a burden, would ya come back some other time then?"

"O-of course! It's the least I could do! I have to be off now, but I'll be back tomorrow or something like that, okay? I have to run to town, so I'll be seeing you later." Fluttershy gave her friend one more forced smile and then turned around, where it immediately disappeared. She groaned, and flapped her wings, taking off.

She had to see Twilight.

Fluttershy knocked a few times on the door to the library, hoping Twilight was home. A few moments later the purple unicorn opened it, letting the two inside. She was sitting at her desk, writing something down on a scroll.

"Hi Twilight. You probably know why I'm here, so-"

"I think I've found it!" Twilight exclaimed, jumping up from her seat. Fluttershy smiled excitedly and sped up to her. "I think I've finally found exactly how to do it!"

"You do?! Can you do it then?"

"I'll try. Just put him on the ground there, will you?" Fluttershy nodded and set the spirit down in front of the unicorn. Twilight lit her horn, preparing the spell. The glow from her horn grew brighter, and soon a little flash flew out and encased Discord in the bubble, lifting him off the floor. Fluttershy chewed on her hooves. The bubble flashed, creating a blinding light. Twilight watched the spell work away, hoping that this was indeed the right one. After a few more minutes, it lowered to the ground again and the spell ended. When Fluttershy saw what was there she nearly fainted.

Discord was there. He was bigger. But he wasn't adult.

"What the- huh?!" Twilight gaped, dumbfounded. The two ponies stared at the draconequus, who seemed somewhat confused and was now rubbing his head.

"What happened Twilight!?" Fluttershy exclaimed, turning to look at the stunned unicorn.

"I-I don't know! That spell should've been the right one! I could've swore it was!"

"What was?" Discord asked, turning his attention to the two ponies who were watching him. Fluttershy didn't even know what to say. His voice sounded younger. In fact, he looked like he was only a little older than he was in the picture.

Twilight took a hesitant step forward. "Do you know where you are?"

Discord shook his head.

"Do you know who we are?" Fluttershy asked.

"No clue. Where are Celestia and Luna?"

"So you do know who they are?" Twilight inquired.

Discord snorted. "Well, duh! Why wouldn't I? I've known them, like, my whole life!" He crossed his arms.

"How old are you?"

"Three hundred thirty-three."

"Wow. Okay, um. . ."

"Where are they?"

"In Canterlot, of course. At the castle."

"Then why am I here? I'm leaving!" He raised his arm to snap his fingers. Fluttershy quickly sped forward and put it back down at his side. He looked down at her, annoyed. "What are you doing?"

"Oh, I, um. . ." The pegasus struggled to find a answer."Oh! I'm your guardian! I'm supposed to be looking after you!"

"Whatever. I don't need a guardian. Seeyah."

"No!" Fluttershy held onto his waist as he teleported. She felt a sickening feeling in her stomach and shut her eyes. She cracked one open after the feeling stopped. The straight stone walls of the castle loomed over them. Fluttershy let out a sigh of relief.

"Would you get off me?!" Discord exclaimed, looking down at her in annoyance.

"Oh! Um, of course." The pegasus fluttered her wings and landed beside him, determined not to let him out of her sight.

"What happens to this place? Did Tia and Luna decorate or something? I don't remember any of this, and I was just here a few days ago."

"Well, you could say that. . ."

Discord put his paw against the door to the thrown room, pushing it open. He looked inside for a brief moment before closing it. Then, suddenly, his eyes grew wide and he opened it back up again. Fluttershy followed close after him. Whatever made his face look like that couldn't have been good. Then she realized that this was the room with the stained glass windows.

"What. . . What are these? Why am I on them? Why are Celestia and Luna doing that to me? Why do they look so mad?" Discord asked, drawing a paw down the smooth glass.

"Um. . ."

"And then some other ponies are doing it to me? Wait. . ." He leaned in closer to it. "That's you! And that one is your friend! What happened to me?!" Discord turned to face Fluttershy. The pegasus shifted uncomfortably. She was interrupted by the door opening on the other side of them.

"Discord! You're back to normal!" Celestia exclaimed, trotting up to them. Discord turned around, and then the Princess took a step back. "Oh. You're not. . .?"

"Celestia!? What happened to you?! Where's Luna?!" Discord demanded.

"Well, let's just say you're not the right age. And Luna is sleeping."

"What are you talking about? How am I not the right age? If anypony isn't the right age, it's you. What does Luna look like?"

"Celestia! Did I hear you say Discord is back to normal?!" Luna's voice called from somewhere before she entered the room. She took one look at him and her jaw dropped.

"Um, not exactly," Celestia said.

"What happened to you two? Why am I on these windows, why are you two so old, and why did I wake up to some pegasus and unicorn that are even on these windows?" Discord asked, looking confused and irritated.

Celestia looked at Luna. The Night Princess shrugged. "Well, why don't you follow us? We have a lot to discuss. . ."

". . . And that's when we came up here," Celestia finished. They had been busy telling Discord what had happened to him for the rest of the day. He had asked a lot of questions, as teenagers often do, and now Luna was raising the moon.

"So, have anymore questions?" Fluttershy asked. Discord stared at the ground, his face emotionless.

". . . Am I ever going to be back to my "regular" age?" he murmured. He looked up.

"Hopefully. Twilight is busy working on the solution right now, I'm sure. She's been trying her hardest to get you back to normal."

"Well then, what am I supposed to do?"

Celestia stood up from where she was resting across from them. They had all been huddled on the thick, plush carpet of her royal chambers. "I see no reason why you cannot stay with Fluttershy, so I hereby state that she will be your guardian until this whole mess is resolved."

"What?! I'm going to be staying with this wimpy pegasus?! Way no fair!" Discord growled.

"Oh shut up Discord! Just deal with it!" Luna teased. He stuck his tongue out at her and crossed his arms. Luna leaned over and whispered something into Fluttershy's ear. "Be careful. Teenage Discord was quite a handful. It will be much more difficult, now that he can use his magic on will. If he disobeys, well, I'm sure you'll find some way to deal with him."

"I'll do my best," Fluttershy said determinedly as Luna laughed.

BEHAVE OR FLUTTERBITCH WILL GET YOU

Fluttershy crossed her arms, looking expectantly at the spirit in front of her. She raised an eyebrow. "Well?"

Discord glanced over at her, somewhat annoyed. "What?" He snorted.

Fluttershy glared at the draconequus. "Discord, get your feet of the table right now."

Discord rolled his eyes, and took his feet off the table. "I don't get what's so bad about it. Just a table.."

"I got that from my mother!" She pointed at the coffee table and flew right in front of him. "And I do not appreciate it getting dirty because a naughty spirit won't take his feet off the table." She produced a duster and started brushing it against the top, making sure it was clean.

Discord rolled his eyes again, snorting. "Whatever, Fluttermom. I don't care." He teleported, ending up behind her. Then, getting an idea, he raised his talon and snapped. Suddenly a huge wave of chocolate milk poured through the cottage, drenching everything as Discord stood there with his mouth open and arms outstretched to catch as much as possible. Fluttershy let out a shrill scream that was cut short as she got drowned in the fluid.

After the wave had passed, the now quite angry and flustered, dripping wet pegasus sat up and blew some drenched hair out of her face. Discord was laughing, pounding the air, which Fluttershy had no idea how. She growled, stormed up to the spirit and pulled him down by his tail.

"You think that's funny?! My house is completely soggy!" Fluttershy yelled in his face, gesturing to her destroyed home.

Discord smirked. "Obviously I think it's funny because I'm laughing."

"Well I don't think it's funny!" She stomped her hoof on the floor.

"Well I do. So, ha." He crossed his arms and stuck his tongue out at her. Fluttershy resisted the urge to punch him and settled instead for screaming through her clenched teeth a little. The pegasus glared at him and turned around, knowing she would never win.

"Why do you have to be so mean to me?" Fluttershy whimpered, sticking her bottom lip out, eyes watering. Discord didn't say anything, but raised an eyebrow. "You're always messing with my house and pets..." She sniffled, biting her lip. Discord's eyes widened as he realized what was coming. The pegasus let out an earsplitting wail, tears pouring out of her eyes like Pinkie Pie always did when she was crying. Discord quickly made an umbrella appear, but not before getting soaked in tears instead of chocolate milk.

"Okay, okay! I'll fix it, alright?" Discord asked, trying to get her to calm down a bit. Fluttershy stopped crying and looked over at him from where she had her head in her hooves.

"R-really?" she squeaked.

Discord sighed. "Yes."

"Yay!" Fluttershy wiped the tears away and gave her signature cheer of joy. Discord groaned and was given a hug by the pegasus.

"Just get off me and I'll fix it." Fluttershy let go and stood waiting patiently as the spirit snapped his fingers, the house clean once more.

"Thanks, Discord." Fluttershy squeed and looked at her clock. "Oh, I have to meet the girls today. Do you want to come?"

Discord opened his mouth but before he could speak the pegasus said "yes, now come on." He groaned, letting his shoulders sag. Meeting up with her totally annoying friends was about as much as he could take. But he had no choice now.

They flew over Ponyville, dropping in through the library window, which Discord barely fit through.

"Hi gals!" Fluttershy greeted her friends.

Rainbow Dash was the first to look up from the card game they were playing. "Hiyah Flutters! You made it!" She smiled, but it quickly disappeared when she caught what was behind the other pegasus. "... And you brought that guy. Wonderful." Rainbow rolled her eyes and glanced down at her cards again. "Anyways, take a seat. We're playing go fish." Seeing Fluttershy's raised eyebrow, Dash sighed. "Pinkie's choice, obviously."

"Well, okay. Discord, you want to play?" Fluttershy looked at the spirit, who was already bored out of his mind just being there.

"No," he responded firmly.

"Okay then. Be good." The yellow pegasus sat down between Rainbow Dash and Twilight.

Applejack grunted, eyeing Discord. "Hmmph. Teenagers," she grumbled. "Always up to no good."

Discord scowled at her as she turned back to the game. The spirit mumbled something under his breath about the stubborn earth pony and summoned a cloud to sit in.

"Okay, Rarity, you have a fish?" Pinkie Pie asked.

"Pinkie, we're using the fish edition. I've told you that you must use the certain type of fish," Rarity replied.

"But I don't know what one I'm after!"

"Pinkie, just pick one!" Rainbow Dash shouted.

"Fine. You have an eel?"

"No. Go fish," Rarity said. Pinkie reached forward and grabbed a card out of the middle as Rarity did her turn. "Twilight, do you have an angelfish?" Twilight levitated the card over to her without saying anything. "Rainbow Dash, do you have a shark?"

"Nah. Go fish," Rainbow said. Rarity picked up her card. "Pinkie, do you have the squid?"

"Nope! Gold fish, Dashie!" Pinkie replied.

"For the last time, it's go fish!"

"But we technically are fishing, but for our fish cards!" Pinkie started laughing.

"Uuuuhhhhh..." Rainbow reached for a card out of the center. As she touched one, it turned into an eel. "Hey! What the-?!" It shocked her with electricity, and she tumbled back, hitting her head on the bookshelf. Her mane stuck straight up, and had a burning smell to it. Rainbow shook her head to clear it and then glared at Discord, who was snickering in his cloud. "Why I ought to!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, it was such an accident!" Discord laughed, making all the ponies in the room glare at him. "Oh come on, take a joke!"

"Discord, that's not how you treat ponies. Say sorry to Dash right now, or else," Fluttershy commanded.

"Or what? I'm not scared of you." Discord leaned over the edge of the cloud and flicked her nose. Fluttershy slapped his paw away angrily.

"Get that dumb smirk off your face before I take it off for you!" Rainbow shouted, lifting up her hooves in a fighting stance.

"Pff. What are you going to do, Rainbow Crash?" Discord snorted sarcastically.

"I'll show you what I'll do! Bring it on! I can-" Fluttershy shoved her hoof in Dash's mouth.

"That's enough out of both of you. Discord, say sorry," the pegasus commanded.

"Nah, I think I won't," Discord said, putting his arms behind his head as he laid there, stretched out on the cloud. Fluttershy growled, getting angry once more.

"Well, if you're not going to apologize, then you're not staying in here." Fluttershy stood up.

"Not like I want to be here anyways." Discord made the cloud disappear and stood up. Fluttershy went up behind him and started pushing him. "Wait, where are you taking me?" The pegasus continued pushing him back. She pushed him into a side room and finally answered his question.

"Time out."

"What! You can't put me in time out! I'm hundreds of years older than you-"

Fluttershy slammed the door shut. She immediately saw the door knob turning, and shouted "stay in there until I tell you, you can come out!" She heard an angry, muffled response. "If you come out before, you don't wanna know what I'll do!" There was some angry yelling, and then silence. Fluttershy turned and sat back down with her friends.

"That was awesome! You sure showed him!" Rainbow Dash laughed.

"Yeah, but that was just one time. I'm always making empty threats. I'm just glad he usually listens to me when I get mad, or else I'd have to think of a punishment. I'd never be able to do that." She sighed. Rarity came up and patted her on the back.

"Has he ever not listened to you?" she asked.

"Well, there was this one time..." Fluttershy looked back on the memory.

"Discord, stop torturing Angel bunny! He never did anything to you!" Fluttershy shouted angrily. The spirit was holding him upside down, squirting him with a water gun.

"This isn't torturing; we're having a water fight," Discord said, continuing his annoying squirting.

"No, it's not. Now put him down right now, or else." Fluttershy stomped her hoof. Angel squeaked angrily.

"How do you know?" Discord looked over at the glaring pegasus.

"Because I'm the adult here! Now put him down!"

"Technically, I'm the adult. Hello, over three hundred years old."

"Uh, arrogant spirit, party of one, your table is ready!" Fluttershy flew up and took Angel from his paws. "And I'm the adult here. Not you. You're the one who needs the guardian. You're not as old as me in experience. You are a teenage draconequus. I am a grown up pony. We're going by that." She walked away and put Angel outside. The bunny hopped away, leaving a trail of water.

"I never needed a guardian." Discord flew over her, and tripped the pegasus with his tail. She fell over and he started laughing.

"Oh no you just didn't." Fluttershy scowled at the draconequus and stood up.

"I just did, yes. And now I'm going to do this." He snapped his talon, making a giant tub of chocolate milk appear, and then pushed Fluttershy into it. Discord started laughing hysterically while the pegasus hauled herself out. She growled.

"DISCORD!" Fluttershy shouted. Discord stopped laughing for a moment. She pointed one hoof at the other side of the room.

"What?" he asked.

"Corner. Now." She continued pointing.

"You've got to be kidding me. You're kidding right?" Discord looked at her disbelief.

"No. Now go. Or I'll make you."

"You'll make me?" Discord laughed. "Have you forgotten who you're talking to?"

"No. But it seems you have." Fluttershy flew up and bit onto his ear.

"Ow! Hey, let go!" She pulled the spirit over by the ear and stood him in the corner.

"Stay there." Fluttershy let go and landed. She shook herself off, splattering milk droplets everywhere.

"This is stupid."

"Well, maybe you should've thought of that before you decided to misbehave." Fluttershy got out a mop and started to clean the floor. An awkward silence came next.

"... How long do I have to stand here?" Discord asked.

"Until I say so," Fluttershy responded. She continued cleaning.

"When's that?"

"I'm still deciding."

"... Now?"

"Not even close. From the way you behaved, you'll be there for a while." Fluttershy finished cleaning and put the mop away. "Think about what you did. And don't move."

"He ended up being in that corner for an hour," Fluttershy said after she had told the story.

"I had no idea it was that bad," Twilight murmured. The others agreed.

"It's not all terrible. I mean, he's nice... sometimes." She paused as the ponies looked at her. "Okay, okay, he's awful! He uses so much magic to torture me and my animals! And all these childish 'punishments' are getting nowhere. All it does is embarrass him, so it's not even worth it. I just wish he was his normal age, with normal annoyingness!" Fluttershy flopped over dramatically.

"Fluttershy, dear, it's okay. You'll find some way yo make him behave. It seems he listens to you when you threaten him with "or else," so it can't be all bad, right?" Rarity guessed.

"Well, I guess you're right... but he's still really bad."

"He is a teenager," Pinkie Pie said. "All teenagers are wild. I remember throwing parties with lots of alcohol when I was a teen. Don't worry, he'll grow out of being totally annoying and bad, just like all teenagers."

"In another three hundred years?!"

"Oh, huh, that's right..." Pinkie fell quiet. "Twilight, I think you should hurry with that spell."

"I'm still working. I must've done something wrong with the first counter spell, so now I have to change it. But I'm no closer than I was three months ago!" Twilight exclaimed, holding a hoof out in indignation.

"Let's just hope it's soon,"Rainbow Dash muttered. "I'm getting sick of that guy."

"Ah agree. Discord is hard to control. It was better when he was a baby," Applejack said.

"We can't do anything for now, unfortunately," Twilight sighed. Fluttershy was about to say something, when they heard a shout from the other room.

"Why do you have this book Twilight!? GROSS!"

"Seems like he found your stash," Rainbow Dash teased. Twilight rubbed the back of her head sheepishly. "Wait, am I right?"

"IIIIIIII'MMMMMM BOOOORRREEEDDD!" Discord yelled. "Can I come out yet?"

"No!" Fluttershy shouted.

"Why?"

"Becasue I said so!" They heard another angry shout. Then, in a bright flash, Discord had teleported outside of the room. "Hey! I said no!"

"But it's so boring! All those books! Lllaaammmeeee!" Discord waved his paw in the air. "Plus I like fire and that really wouldn't be the best thing surrounded by all those books."

"Wait, did you say fire?" Twilight gasped.

"Yeah, don't worry though. I just scorched a few when I was mad. My mane kinda combusts sometimes when I'm angry. Something I can't really control." Discord smiled lazily as the unicorn shot into the other room.

"You disobeyed me again! I can't believe you did that!" Fluttershy yelled.

"I would," Rainbow Dash said.

"Yeah you're right I don't know why I said that." Fluttershy looked down. "But the thing is that you never listen to me! Why?!"

"Because I don't care," Discord said, smirking.

"You should!"

"Well I don't."

"We're leaving! Sorry girls. But Discord and I need to talk. Come on." Fluttershy led the way out the door. Discord sighed and followed after her. The other ponies watched them walk out, shaking their heads.

"I don't believe you," Fluttershy said. She paced in front of him. They were at the cottage.

"Well, I wouldn't believe me either, so I guess I don't blame you," Discord told her, smirking slightly.

"You've got to start listening to me."

"Eh."

"Eh?! Is that what you just said!? Uhhh! Why?!" Fluttershy dropped from the air out of frustration.

"Yeah."

"I've had enough."

"So have I."

"Excuse me?!" Fluttershy's head shot up from where she was looking at the floor.

"You heard me."

Fluttershy gave him a deadpan stare for a few moments before pointing at the other side of the room. "Corner."

"Again?!"

"Yes. Do you want me to escort you over there?"

"That's a punishment for a kid." Discord crossed his arms.

"Well, when you stop acting like a kid I'll stop treating you like one." Fluttershy took his arm and dragged him to the corner. He stuck his tongue out at the pegasus. "You get five extra minutes for that."

"Oh come on!"

Dirty Dancing

Loud music blasted through the small cottage. Flutttershy lie in bed, ears flattened against her head and eyes wide open and bloodshot. The whole house was shaking.

Three A.M. Three A.M.

"That's it!" Fluttershy shouted, sitting up in bed and throwing her bright pink blankets off of her. She stormed into the other room, which Discord was currently staying in, and went up to the speakers. She clicked them off. Discord looked over from the bed and glared over at her. He teleported right next to her, hovering in the air.

"Why'd you shut off my music?" he demanded, crossing his arms. Fluttershy narrowed her eyes and glanced up at him.

"It's three in the morning. Time for bed. It was time for bed four hours ago actually," she told him sternly.

"Like I care," he responded. He turned the music on again, the force of it blowing Fluttershy off her hooves from where she stood. The pegasus hit the wall and collapsed on the floor. A few books from the shelf above her fell onto her head, and one stayed there, open with its pages splayed. She pulled it off and stood up. Without another word, she walked over and turned it off again.

"Go to bed," she commanded. Discord shook his head like a stubborn child. Fluttershy bit onto the tip of his tail and he grunted in surprise as she pulled him over to the bed. He teleported out of her grasp and, once again, turned the music on. This time Fluttershy was ready for it, and managed to hang onto the bed post as her mane whipped around her.

"Face it; you'll never win," Discord snorted. He turned and started to shuffle. Then he snapped his paw and then the whole room was turned into a disco club. The spirit now had an Afro and a shiny outfit on. Fluttershy had a headband that pulled her hair back in hippie style, and giant sunglasses on. The pegasus was also wearing a shiny silver outfit. Discord was busy doing paw to hip dancing motion.

"What, not feeling disco? Classical more your style?" Discord snapped his paw again and suddenly the were in a huge ballroom. The sprit was dressed in a tuxedo with his long mane greased back. Fluttershy had a silky red dress on, with small matching shoes. Her pink hair was pulled back in a beautiful bun, with a purple flower stuck in her bangs.

Discord grabbed her and spun her around, then dipped her low to the ground. A rose suddenly appeared in his mouth, and he wiggled his fluffy white eyebrows. Fluttershy barely had time to do anything before she was suddenly picked up in his arms and spun around in the air. He tossed her up, and caught her as she came down. Then he held her close to him and led her in a waltz.

Another scene change.

This time they were in a barn looking place, with country music playing. Discord had on a cowboy hat like Applejack's and a plaid orange and red shirt. Fluttershy had on a hat too, with her hair in a ponytail. They both had on cowboy boots with spurs that clicked every time they set their feet down.

Discord swung her in a circle. He linked his arm through hers and they went around, and he let her go, sending her spinning. He caught her on the other side with ease. Fluttershy felt sick at this point.

Another change.

This time they were both in suits with sunglasses.

"Gangnam Style!" Discord shouted, starting to dance. Fluttershy's body started doing what he was doing, and she couldn't do anything about it. She was stuck. Then the music changed. She was now wearing a skirt and tank top, with her hair falling over her shoulders. Discord then pushed her into a pool as he walked by. He shouted some things she couldn't understand, then suddenly it changed again.

Discord was now wearing a flat brimmed hat facing backwards, with a red sweatshirt hanging loosely on him. A white tank top was under that, and she could plainly see "LORD OF CHAOS" tattooed on his chest. He had several piercings in his ears, lip, nose, and eyebrows.

Fluttershy was wearing a ton of makeup on her face, and also had piercings all over her. She had a skirt and tank top on, and her mane was messy.

She was getting annoyed.

"Discord! Stop!" Fluttershy shouted over the music, and Discord looked over at her in surprise. He smirked.

"Oh, I'm sorry, do you prefer ballet?" Discord asked smugly. He snapped his talon and then Fluttershy was wearing a pink tutu with ballet slippers on. Discord wasn't wearing anything this time, but quickly scooped her up and leaped around with her, spinning in a circle. Fluttershy flapped her wings, breaking out of his grasp and proceeding to kick him straight in the face as she flew away. The scene flickered, and disappeared. Fluttershy was once again naked and Discord was sprawled on the floor with a hoof print on his forehead. He sat up and rubbed his head, wincing. "What'd you do that for?"

"I didn't mean to do it, but all I wanted was for you to stop. Now, GO TO BED!" Fluttershy screamed, this time blowing his mane back. His ears went flat against his head and he squinted his eyes closed. After that the spirit begrudgingly stood up and plopped down on the soft bed. Fluttershy smiled. "Goodnight Discord." She got a small grumble in response and left the room.

"Come on, I gotta go shopping today! The early bird gets the worm!" Fluttershy shouted as she grabbed her saddle bags. Discord floated into the living room, mane uncombed and eyes half closed. "At least clean up before we leave." Discord mumbled something and snapped his talon. His mane went back to its normal wildness and he looked more awake. "Okay, come now." Fluttershy led the way out the door.

As they arrived at the market, Fluttershy headed for the asparagus and Discord slowly followed. As she purchased a few bundles, a kick ball smacked Discord right in the back of the head. He fell onto his face with a painful thud.

Fluttershy turned to the culprits: three teenagers- two colts and one mare- that stood snickering around the corner. "Hey now, that wasn't very nice," she scolded, shaking a hoof at them. She looked down at the spirit laying on the ground. "Discord, you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just peachy," he grumbled, annoyed. He pushed himself back up and tuned around to face the teens. They laughed silently, until Discord floated over to them. He towered over them, making them lose their grins. "What's the big deal, huh?"

"Well, um-"

"You look weird," the mare said, interrupting the colt and looking up at Discord. She was a pegasus with a Mohawk yellow mane with a short choppy tail, blue fur, and golden eyes. The colt beside her was green and had a blue mane with blue eyes. The other colt was grey and had orange fur and a black mane with brown eyes. The colts were both pegasi also.

Discord's mane glowed a little as he bared his teeth. "You calling me ugly?"

"Yeah, I guess I am," she snapped.

Discord's mane lit fully on fire this time, and his paws burned with golden magic. His eyes glowed red, eyebrows twitching. "You sure you wanna say that?"

"Yes, I am! You dumb or something?"

"You are if you think I'll let you get away with that!" Discord shouted. He held his paws up to the sky, and storm clouds gathered. They crackled with electricity. Fluttershy saw what was about to happen and quickly flew forward to stop it.

"Discord! Calm dow-" She didn't get to finish as a huge lightning bolt struck down right where the mare had been standing only a moment before. It burned a hole in the ground. "Discord! No, Discord, stop!" Fluttershy shot forward and dumped a bucket of water she had grabbed from nowhere on Discord's head. His mane went out and his anger faded. Slightly. He stomped forward, but the pegasus took hold of his arm and dragged him back.

"Let me at 'em!" Discord shouted, swinging his fists. Fluttershy continued dragging him back. The teens snickered, and Discord snarled. "This isn't over!" Fluttershy brought him around a corner so he couldn't see them any more.

"You go home, okay? I'll finish shopping. No messing around, you got me?" Fluttershy asked, looking at the spirit.

"Meh," he mumbled, arms crossed.

"Go home." She let go of him and flew off, determined to get shopping done. Discord turned around and immediately set off to teach those kids a lesson.

Plot Twist

Discord growled, sneaking back through the streets. He was going to show those kids they didn't mess with the Lord of Chaos. And of course, they were in the exact same place he had last seen them, so they were easy to find.

Discord snapped his fingers, and he vanished. He reappeared right over their heads, his arms crossed. He glared at them, waiting for them to notice.

The green colt was the first to realize that the spirit was hovering above their heads. He had to do a double take when he didn't get it through his mind the first time. His eyes widened and he tapped the other colt's shoulder.

"What do you want, Spearmint?" the grey colt colt snapped, stopping his conversation with the mare.

Spearmint motioned upwards.

"Huh? Oh, look! It's that Mamma's Boy from earlier!" he said to the girl. She looked up. Then she laughed.

"Hey, come on, Rocky! You might hurt his feelings and he'll start crying!" she snickered, "don't want him to tell on us!" That sent the three into hysterics, howling in laughter.

"Good one, Rain!" Rocky wailed, putting his arm around the pegasus mare for a few moments before falling to the ground.

Above them, Discord's face was red. His fists were clenched, smoke coming out of his ears from the pressure of trying not to let his mane combust again. (Because, even he had to admit, it got kind of annoying).

"Oh, that's what you choose to say? Well, I think you'll regret that," the Lord of Chaos said, grinning evilly. His eyes darkened and he snapped his fingers.

The ground suddenly was turned into soap, and the three laughing teens were sent slipping all over the place, their humor replaced with confusion. A bright flash and then cotton candy clouds were pouring chocolate rain down on them, making it even harder for them to stand up.

"What the heck is going on?!" Rain exclaimed, giving a flap of her wings to pick herself off the soapy ground.

"Just little old me again!" Discord chimed, waving at them through a hole in the clouds. He waved his paw and it started hailing bouncy balls, making the mare yelp and fall back to the ground.

"Is this your idea of revenge?" she asked angrily, trying to avoid the falling balls.

"Of course not! Why would I ever do that?" Discord made a angel halo appear above his head.

"Because if it is, then it's not working! This is child's play!"

"Really? Oh, no, you've hurt my feelings!" Discord put a paw over his heart, feigning hurt. He stopped the storm and let the ground return to dirt. Discord appeared right beside the pegasi.

"Ha! That all you got?" Rocky asked, getting to his hooves.

"No."

Rocky suddenly had a large boa constructer wrapped around him. The colt screamed like a filly, trying to get the snake off.

"I'm coming!" Spearmint shouted, going over to help his friend.

"Well, I've taken down two of your team already! What a day!" Discord cheered, clapping. Each clap was a different animal noise.

Rain snorted, glaring at the draconequus. "You're bragging? I wouldn't. Those two are idiots. I only hang out with them because they won't stop following me everywhere I go." She glanced back at them.

"I don't care. Something is still an accomplishment, am I right?" He gave her a lazy smile.

"What?" she asked, raising an eyebrow, "Like this?"

Discord looked at her as she flew up to face level. "Like what?"

She pulled back her blue hoof and punched him in the face.

"Serves you right, going off to find trouble like that," Fluttershy scolded, her reprimanding voice cutting through the air. She held an icepack to Discord's eye, which was now swollen and black.

"I told you to go home, but you didn't. I should've known; I should've walked home with you. And looked what happened! You went off, picking fights and causing chaos! Is your black and blue eye worth it?" she demanded. She let Discord take the icepack from her hooves.

Discord pondered it for a moment. "Um. . maybe?"A quick yet harsh smack from Fluttershy's yellow hoof silenced the snarky draconequus. She turned around and crossed her arms, still hovering in the air. He sighed, taking the icepack from his face. "Look, I'm sorry, alright?"

The pegasus spun around, her face angry. "You bet you're sorry! Do you want me to look like a completely stupid pony who can't control anypony? Do you? Because I'll tell you something; I won't put up with it! I am your guardian, and I'm not about to back out now just because you won't listen! I'll make you listen even if it requires taking away your magic!" Fluttershy's voice went up an octave as she chewed the spirit out, delivering several admonishing chest pokes during the lecture.

"So. . .?" Discord didn't know what she was getting at, but he was sure there would be more to his punishment than just getting stuck in the corner for an hour.

"You're grounded. No chaos, and definitely no leaving the house without me accompanying you," Fluttershy said, her arms crossed again. Discord's ears fell to the sides of his head.

"But chaos is all I'm good for!" he argued. "Even I can't control it sometimes! It's chaos, after all! It does what it wants, when it wants. I can just channel that, how do I say this; smoother."

Fluttershy shook her head, closing her eyes momentarily. "No. You have to listen to me, and that's final. No magic. For a week."

". .Fine. But if it goes off, don't blame me." And with that, he flew out of the room.

Discord rolled over in his bed, getting into the perfect position to sleep. He was just about to doze off when he heard a small 'tink' on his window. He sat up groggily, ears lopsided; one up and one down, and brought his head up to the window.

Another quiet 'tink' was his reward.

The spirit opened the window and leaned out. Outside of the cottage, down in the flowers, was the very pegasus who had given him the black eye earlier that very day.

Rain glanced around quickly before looking back up at Discord. "Hey, pal, wanna come out with me?" she hissed.

"Come out? With you? Are you nuts?" Discord asked in the loudest whisper he could muster. "You punched me in the face earlier!"

"Look, I'm sorry, but I was just acting tough in front of those two idiots. The truth is, I didn't mean to kick that ball at you. They thought you looked weird so I went along with it. I never wanted it end up in a fight. I may seem tough, but I'm actually not that bad."

"Yeah, look, I'm already in trouble with the little Flutter Butter, and I don't need anything added on to my sentence in this prison, so bye!" He was about to slam the window shut when Rain shot into the house. "Hey!" He quickly covered his mouth. The light turned on in the hallway.

"Discord, are you alright in there? I heard yelling," Fluttershy said from outside.

"Oh, um, I just, uh. . " Discord faltered, not knowing what to say.

Rain piped in. "Tell her you stubbed your hoof!" she hissed.

"I just stubbed my toe! It's all fine!"

"Okay, well, goodnight," Fluttershy replied. The light turned off again.

"Whoo, that was close," Rain commented, wiping some sweat off her brow.

"Close?! You- out now!" Discord pointed at the window. It flung open, his magic stopping the sound.

"Come on, dude! Let's go hang out! You seem pretty cool, and I like cool. We could hit a few bars or something, you know. I know a kid who's having a party tonight." She hovered in the air and pretended to punch something. "Get in a few fights, it'll be great!"

Discord glared at her. "No."

Rain groaned, falling back to the floor. "Why not? Scared?"

"The Lord of Chaos is never scared!" The spirit loomed over her menacingly.

She motioned towards the window, smirking. "Then follow me."

LOL WHAT

Two sets of eyes popped up over the edge of the bush; one golden and one red. The golden set lowered, shining in the darkness.

"Alright, it's clear. Come on, Discord!" Rain whispered, setting off. Discord snaked along behind her.

"Where are we going again?" the draconequus asked.

"My friend is having this awesome party, and his are always filled with the good stuff. Sometimes we have drinking contests- I always win." She smirked. "Just make sure not to go all crazy on somepony. Wait, actually, that'd be pretty sweet."

"I don't try-well, not all the time-to go crazy. I'm the being of chaos, after all. It's my duty to be chaotic." To prove his point, Discord turned into a bat, barking like a dog.

Rain raised an eyebrow, stopping at a house with teenage ponies milling around outside. They could hear the music blaring from inside, practically shaking the ground. "Before we go in, I have a question."

"Lay it on me."

"Are you old enough to drink?"

Discord rolled his eyes. "Hello? I'm over three hundred, I think I'm old enough to drink in age. Maybe not by pony ages, as I'm only a teenager right now, but whatever."

"Pfft, whatever. Nopony here is old enough to drink anyways. Just look at us!" Rain laughed, and she led Discord up to the house. Ponies stopped, staring, as the pair went in.

The blasting music immediately made Discord cringe once Rain opened the door, so he took hold of the dial that had just appeared behind his head and twisted it down a few notches. Rain looked back at him to make sure he was still following her and they weaved their way through the crowd.

"Hey Discord, say hi to my friend Maybell!" Rain shouted over the music. She put a hoof over the shoulder of a cream colored unicorn with green and yellow hair and spun her around. Two bright blue eyes looked up at the spirit. Her mouth popped open and she exchanged a glance with Rain.

"Oh my gosh, Rain, where'd you find this guy?" she asked, her speech slurred slightly.

"Nowhere in particular," the blue mare responded. Maybell stepped forward a little bit, looping her arm around Discord's snake-like body. She poked him playfully in the stomach, smiling.

"Gosh, he's so skinny! I wish all stallions were so skinny!" She laughed, falling to the side a little bit.

"Dang girl, how much have you had to drink?" Rain asked, taking hold of the unicorn and pulling her away from the slightly creeped out Discord. Maybell put her hoof to her chin, pondering.

"Um. . does 13 sound right?" She giggled as she scampered away from the pair, going towards another group to tell them about the spirit. Discord sighed.

"Oh, forget about her. She's just drunk. Come on; let's go get some drinks." Rain took hold of his paw and continued along their journey to the kitchen. As they entered the kitchen, they saw two white pegasi twins with red and blue streaked manes holding up an orange earth pony as he did a keg stand.

"Hey Lightning! Streak! Drop Marmalade and get your rumps over here!" Rain called, putting her hooves up to her mouth. Two sets of blue fading to red eyes looked at her in surprise. Duel smiles appeared on their faces and they flew over, wingbeats in perfect sync. The pony, Marmalade, grunted as he flopped onto the floor. Discord shot a questioning glance at the mare by his side. She smirked. "Identical twins. And when I say identical, I mean identical. Everything they do is the same; even their cutie marks are related." She motioned to their flanks with a blue hoof. On one, his mark was a falling star. On the other, his mark was a falling star with a lightning bolt shaped tail. "But be careful; they can be douchebags sometimes."

"Wassup Rain?" the first one, presumably Streak judging by his cutie mark, asked lazily.

"Not much. But I have somepony to introduce you to: meet Discord," Rain announced, motioning to said somepony. Discord waved slightly, not sure how to approach this whole thing.

Lightning and Streak exchanged glances. Then they started laughing.

"Oh, he looks like such an idiot!" Lightning cackled.

"I agree!" Streak screeched. The twins fell to the ground at the same time.

Discord cringed, not hearing somepony laugh at his appearance for a long while. Then he growled, his temper getting the best of him. An evil grin appeared on his face, and he snapped his fingers. With a flash of golden magic, the twins were now completely different.

Lightning was now a mare unicorn with a red coat and a long purple mane and tail, blue eyes, and a piece of candy for a cutie mark, while Streak was now a pegasus with a yellow coat, short green mane and tail, grey eyes, and a hammer as a cutie mark.

At seeing their predicaments, the once twins let out shrieks of astonishment. They panicked, running in circles and yelling random things at each other.

Rain's eyebrows raised to the point where they were no longer on her face. She then started laughing hysterically, tears forming in her shut eyes.

A yellow earth pony with sunglasses took them off her face, violet eyes wide and disbelieving. "Mother of Celestia."

Discord was content, hovering in the air with his arms crossed. Ponies in the room were laughing and snorting madly at the two siblings. Rain was in a heap on the floor, pounding one hoof against the wood.

A green pegasus with spiky yellow hair put one arm around Discord's shoulders, snorting half drunkenly. "That was awesome, man, just awesome. You really got those fools." He poked Discord in the chest, still sputtering nonsense. Maybell, who had wandered into the kitchen for another drink, raised the red cup to the roof.

"Woo hoo Disharmony!" the unicorn yelled.

"It's Discord," the spirit reminded.

"Same thing, right?" Maybell grinned, then downed her drink. She looked inside the now empty cup, one eye closed, then glanced around the kitchen. She swiped a full cup from a different pony, earning an astonished "hey!" from them. The earth pony grumbled, walking away.

"Well, we came in here to get drinks, right?" Rain asked, recovering from her hysterical laughter. Discord nodded and the mare went to get two drinks.

Later that night...

"Uh, gosh, I am feeling it," Discord muttered, holding his head. Rain glanced over at him from her spot on the living room sofa. She blinked.

"Aw, are you gonna leave?" she asked sadly, drunk out of her mind.

"Yeah, I think.."

"Wait! Don't leave!" a voice from behind them yelled. Lighting and Streak were behind the spirit. They looked horrible; manes wild and fur ruffled.

"We're sorry! Please, change us back!" Streak begged on his knees.

"What took you dumb asses so long to come grovel at his feet?" Rain growled angrily, drink splashing out of her cup.

"We aren't used to being different!" Lightning snapped. "We had to find out how to WALK!"

"You're such pansies," the pegasus muttered. She tipped her head back and took a drink of her cider.

"But anyways, change us back!" Streak exclaimed.

"Yeah, yeah, we were just being stupid! We didn't mean it!" Lightning defended.

Discord rolled his mismatched eyes. "Fine. Just let me get the spell ready." The spirit brought his paw up to his head. He snapped and a golden glow enveloped the siblings.

Nothing happened.

"Why didn't it work?" Rain asked, seeing this. She squinted her golden eyes at the draconequus.

"Um, it might be 'cuz I'm not exactly coherent," was the reply. As if to show, Discord stumbled a bit to the side. Suddenly, his legs gave out under him. Discord groaned, squeezing his eyes shut.

Rain sat up a bit. She looked concerned. "Discord? You alright? Oh Celestia, does being intoxicated do something to you, since you're a different species?" She gasped. "I'm not going to go to jail if you die, am I?"

Discord snorted. "I'm immortal, idiot." He tried to sit up, but failed. "But. . . I don't really want to test that."

"Sorry guys, well, used to be guys, but you'll have to be not twins for a while. Gotta get this drunkard home," Rain told Streak and Lighting as she got off the couch. Her wing beats were messed up, but she managed to fly. She scooped Discord up from under the arms and started to drag him away.

"I didn't even drink as much as you!" Discord objected to hearing this.

"Shut up."

Rain dropped Discord into his bed with a soft fluff. She sighed.

"Alright, bye. Remind me to never get you drunk," Rain groaned, popping her back. She flew out the window.

Discord rolled over, exhausted. No alcohol, ever AGAIN.

But little did they know, it would have a worse effect on him than realized. . .

I'm on crack

Discord woke up, blinking. Sunlight filtered in through the window, making the room glow. It would have been a wonderful morning if he wasn't in trouble with the little Flutter Butter and he got to use his magic.

Grumbling incoherently, the spirit clambered out of bed. Surprisingly, his head didn't hurt at all. There was no sign of a hangover and all seemed fine. Except the fact that his bed was ten times bigger than it normally was.

Discord promptly fell what seemed like fifty feet to the ground, even though on a regular day it was only about two. He landed hard on his back and groaned, rolling over. As soon as he saw the giant beast in front of him he let out a squeak and sprang backwards.

The snow white bunny narrowed his eyes. Angel then sighed, turned round, and left the room. A moment later Fluttershy entered, looking confused.

"Discord! Angel said you were small?" she squeaked as her head popped around the door, surveying the room.

"Yeah, we might have a problem," came the reply, Discord's voice now high pitched and squeaky.

"Oh no! What did you do to yourself?" Fluttershy came forward and saw the draconequus sitting on the floor and picked him up in a hoof. "Can you change yourself back?"

"You said no magic, Flutter Butter," Discord teased, sticking his tongue out.

"Okay, okay, you can use magic. Just change yourself back."

Smirking, Discord snapped his paw. . . and nothing happened. He tried again, but still no result.

"Oh, my, what should we do? If your magic won't work then we're really screwed!"

"Fluttershy!" the spirit gasped mockingly, "watch your language!"

"I'm sorry. I've just been really tense lately, with all of this. I never use words like that," the pegasus said sadly, a small sigh escaping her lips.

"Oh come now, my dear, it'll all be better! Say, why don't we go to Twilight's and have her try to fix me? Even if I don't like to admit it, she's a smart girl and probably has a cure in one of her many books."

"Alright. Here," Fluttershy said, tucking Discord away in her mane, "you can stay in there; at least until we're done."

"And you said you woke up like this?" Twilight inquired, a hoof rubbing her chin. Her eyes were narrowed, looking at Discord, who stood upon a table.

"Yes!" he replied. Twilight had to choke back a laugh. His voice was too funny.

"Can you solve this, Twilight?" Fluttershy asked softly. She was sitting at the other end of the table with her hooves on top near her chest.

"Probably. Here, let me get that book I loaned to you that one time when Discord was a baby. It might have something in there about illnesses or whatever," Twilight muttered, half to herself, and floated a book down towards them. She opened it and flipped through the pages, coming to rest on the right one. She scanned the page carefully, eyebrows furrowing.

"What is it?" Fluttershy asked, leaning forward.

The unicorn let out a small grunt and then replied, "it says here that there are no known illnesses that only affect them, but there is one thing that can cause shrinking."

"And?"

"It's alcohol."

Fluttershy looked taken aback. "B-but I would never give him alcohol! He's just a teen!" She then paused. Both mares slowly turned to look at the darconequus.

He cringed and his ears flattened against his head. "Okay, so maybe I was drinking last night." Fluttershy snorted angrily, looming over him. "Hey! I didn't even have that much!" He raised his paws in defense.

"I cannot believe this! You went out an disobeyed me again! on the same day! You are in so much trouble when you're not small!" the little pegasus screeched.

"Yeah, but that's not the only symptom of what is technically a 'hangover,'" Twilight started. She was looking at the book again. "There are a variety of other effects that come at random times in the same day. But only within a day, so he won't have to be all wierd for the rest of his life-oh wait." She finished with a knowing look at the spirit.

"Well that was just rude," Discors pouted, crossing his arms.

"Does it say what the next ones are?" Fluttershy asked.

"Um, no. Shrinking was the only symptom listed. The rest are hidden under a mixture of what I think is honey and peanut butter," Twilight told her, carefully studying the page.

"Oh, sorry. That probably happened when Discord was a baby for a little while. He loved his honey and peanut butter sandwiches."

"I did? How odd," the named spirit rumbled, a paw to his chin.

"Yeah, you always got it everywhere."

A sudden bang filled the air and several books fell from their shelves. The ponies started in alarm, Fluttershy already hidden under Twilight's tail. The unicorn rolled her eyes and walked towards the door, a blue head sticking out of the wood.

"Oh, hey guys! When did this library get here . . ." she muttered, glancing at the back half of her body, which was currently being enjoyed by ponies outside.

Twilight face hoofed. "Dash, how many times have I told you: open the door."

"Well, I wasn't exactly trying to find my way to the library, now was I?" She rolled her eyes, then suddenly stopped, rubbing a front hoof along her chin. "Or was I?"

"Can I help you with something?"

"Nah. Just, um, *crashed* in. Heh."

"So-"

"Pun intended."

Twilight looked up, eyes staring ahead in a dull glare. She blinked slowly, then returned her gaze down to Rainbow. "These crashes given you brain trauma yet?"

Dash shrugged. "Meh. Probably."

They retained their gazes for a long moment longer, Dash's blank and Twilight's bored.

Finally, the unicorn used her magic to take hold of Rainbow's front hooves and yanked her into the room. The pegasus went flying and landed in a heap in a pile of books. She sat up, shaking an encyclopedia off her head and took flight, hovering a few inches off the floor.

"So, what's going on here?" Rainbow inquired, her eyes narrowed, a wicked smile on her face as her eyes whisked across the room suspiciously.

"Discord's gone and shrunk himself," Twilight said, rolling her eyes.

"Hi, Rainbow Crash," the mini spirit mocked.

Dash glanced around, eyes wide, mouth open. She then burst out laughing. She fell on the floor and rolled around, tears starting to form in her eyes as she held her stomach. "D-did you get a girl voice too while you're at it?"

She cackled loudly and spoke once again, her head up. "O-or maybe, T-Twilight hid a-a tape recorder in here and you're just lip-syncing!" The

pegasus stuttered incoherently as she laughed.

"Uh, you have no idea how much I hate you," Discord muttered. He let his arms hang limp at his side and glared at the laughing blue mare.

"Maybe if you h-hate me so much, you should come and fight me, huh? Wait, have you looked in t-the mirror!?" Dash guffawed, throwing back her head in joyous laughter.

"Now, you two, stop it. It's not nice," Fluttershy scolded lightly from beside the pouting Discord.

"Yeah, I'm gonna go and, uh, "study," now," Twilight muttered as she stalked up towards her bedroom.

"Go rest your brain, Twi! Maybe it'll let you help me!" Discord yelled shrilly. His wings flared and he plopped onto his backside, arms crossed.

Fluttershy sighed deeply and picked Discord up, depositing him in her mane once again. "Come on, Discord. It's only a hangover."

Behold the References

"This is the. Worst. Possible. Thing!"

"Oh calm down. It's going to be gone in less than a day."

Fluttershy rolled her eyes as the mini spirit on her back wallowed in pity, eyes squeezed shut and one paw to his forehead dramatically.

"But Flutter Butter! What about the children?!"

The pegasus stopped in her tracks. "What?" Discord pointed to her wings.

"Fly, Shy."

Fluttershy lifted her wings and took to the air without another word. She had grown used to his randomness long ago. She'd never thought that she's meet anypony more random than Pinkie Pie, but low-and-behold, she was proven wrong.

"Oh no! The griffins are attacking! Bank left!" Discord exclaimed suddenly after a few short minutes of flight. He yanked sharply on her left wing, causing them to drop abruptly to the left.

"Ah! Discord! What are you doing?!" Fluttershy exclaimed, grimacing.

"Your wings are perfect for controlled flight, them being so weak and all. You can barely control them." He grinned. "The second wave is coming!" He yanked up on both her wings. "Do a barrel roll!"

Discord pulled on a wing, making her spin, using the other to make them go around. Fluttershy squealed and frantically waved her hooves about incessantly as the draconequus sent them into a barrel roll. He then yanked on her wings, sending them straight out at her sides. They soared into the air and into the breeze, stabling their flight.

Fluttershy's eyes were wide open, pupils small, but the color extending to early the whole eye. She grimaced, breathing heavily.

"Dis-co-coooorrd!" the pegasus shrieked, squeezing her eyes shut, "can I please land!?" Her scared teal eyes snapped open again.

"Uh. . . fine. Fine. But I'm going to do it," Discord said. "It's just so fun! I wish I could do it to Dash. . "

"Hurry then!"

"Okay, okay." Discord slammed down on both of the yellow appendages. Fluttershy screamed shrilly as their flight was abruptly ended. She kicked her hooves about, all the while shrieking. Discord stuck his paws in the air, cheering. He looked over the edge of his ride and saw that they were nearing the ground.

"Looks like it's time for me to get out of here!" And with that, the spirit launched himself off the falling pegasus and into the sky. Fluttershy continued to screech and flail about. As soon as she realized it, she opened her wings again, feathers spreading out into the wind. The pegasus gave a few sturdy flaps to reach a safe altitude and then directed her fiery gaze on the draconequus.

"Why would you do that?!"

"Hey, you never set any guidelines on how to land you."

"But-- but-- you-- what--"

"The world may never know~"

Discord suddenly grimaced. Fluttershy blinked, surprised, then took him in her hoof.

"Are you okay?" she asked worriedly.

"I'm f-fine."

"Oh, it's probably the next symptom! I wonder what it'll be. . "

"Probably something ridiculous. If I remember correctly, draconequus usually have different symptoms." Discord put his talon up to his beard and stroked it, pondering.

"How would you know that?"

"I don't know."

Fluttershy was about to say something, but decided against it.

"Urg, I think it's coming. I hope I'm big again."

In a small explosion of fire, Fluttershy threw the spirit into the air. She cowered, covering her face with her hooves. She tentatively peeked out through the crack between two.

Discord was regular size again. But instead of his short, donkey-like mane, there was now a. . .

Fiery version of Celestia's mane.

Discord took a pawful of it in his hand. The swirling fire moved as if alive, a swooping forelock across his left eye. His mix matched horns stuck out from the whirling yellow-orange fluff.

"My goodness! I look like Lightmare Sun!"

Fluttershy's right ear twitched. "What."

"Oh, right. It's my name for Celestia if she had been evil instead of Luna."

Fluttershy stared.

"Wanna hear some other scenarios?"

"No Discord."

Princess Celestia was sitting near her fireplace, a quill in her magical grip and a scroll beneath it. Ink flowed smoothly across the paper, words making themselves known. She hummed slightly as she finished with a small flourish, dotting her very last i.

A small portal appeared next to her head. A scroll fell out into her workspace and she smiled, picking it up.

"A letter from Twilight! How nice," Celestis murmured to herself. She gently opened it with her magic and looked inside, seeing a picture. Her smile vanished, replaced with a frown. She slowly looked up, lips pulled tight across her face and eyes settled in a deadpan glare.

"I've had enough of your shit, Discord."