A psycopath in Equestriaby HakunoChaptersFit in or DieA psycopath in EquestriaThis isn't a dreamThe importance of godThe three votesFit in or DieI appeared in Equestria, I don’t know how nor when, I remember I was going out the mall with the rice pack that would be my dinner. In the very next instant, I’m in this over colored world and I recognize Canterlot’s city in the distance. Following the white brick-made path I walk in that direction. The landscape is very accurate to the show, the emerald green grass, the huge plains that extend to the sides, some multi-sized shrubbery that decorate the sides of the road. That’s the most logic right now, keep in the known. Just if I knew this world, why, I can’t even be sure that this is Equestria, but in lack of something else to compare it, it’s identical to the show I love. Something is certain, I see roads and a city. There is intelligence. My head is filled up with thoughts. This is impossible. I correct, this is unlikely. Physically everything is possible, but some events are very unlikely. I’m not a physicist, but there’s the existence of a world very similar to a show of my world. Assuming that I’m in other world. This can be another dimension, well, it’s not like knowing it can have a practical purpose. I see a pegasus flying over me. I hide in a shrub in a side of the road. My theory is that I’m in Equestria, that sounds a little more plausible. Well, I start to gather facts in my head. -This may or may not be a dream. -If this is a dream I’ll wake up and nothing has sense. -If this is not a dream I need an action plan, quick. Just to prevent, I start to build a plan. -If this is a hostile world, or universe, or dimension, I’ll not survive for a long time. -If in the other hand this is Equestria, or at least it’s populated by kind beings, I have to fit in this society. I opt to think in the second option. If this is a hostile world, there won’t be anything to do anyways, not without armament and supplies. I walk until the path meets the city’s doors, the architecture reminds me to the show. Maybe I lost my mind, whatever it is, if I can’t trust in my senses I don’t have anything to trust in. I get into Canterlot. I see ponies, or at least, creatures with an outstanding similarity with the characters of my favorite show. I still had my doubts about being in Equestria, but then some of them hid and exclaimed “For Celestia, What’s that?!” Should I be surprised that they speak my language? Or it’s me who speak their language? My theory was confirmed, but I have no time to feel happy. I’m in Equestria. In this place god exists, is alive and lives in this city, and I’m scaring the people. To this moment I was keeping me incredulous and cold. Now I have fear, a very rational fear. Guards surround me, despite these beings does not exceed the height of my chest, when they push me, they prove to be stronger than me. I don’t resist. I don’t want problems. Even if I could fight the guards, I have nothing to do in a strange world and with all its population and gods against me. Author's Note If you want to read the original version (in spanish), click here. A psycopath in EquestriaThey escort me to the royal building, the princess is waiting for me. Obviously she had been informed about my presence, her height is slightly lower than mine. Her appearance is imposing. I’m in the presence of a goddess. I’m in a throne room. Princess Celestia exists, this world exists and I’m here. Some people would be happy with this. For me it means that something changed, everything changed. I’m in an alternate reality, I’m lucky I have data about this reality, but I’m still going to be judged by the most powerful being of this world. The guards force me to kneel. You don’t notice the intimidating they are until you watch them do their job from my point view. I focus on don’t think. Think can be dangerous. She speaks, her voice is firm and aggressive. “Human, I know what you are, explain your presence in my domains.“ My mind’s still focusing on don’t think. “I don’t know how I came here and I don’t know what I want to do either.“ Her horn glows but nothing happens and I don’t feel anything. I notice. She’s trying to read my mind. She opens her eyes in surprise. She knows that I know it. She knows I have my mind blank. She knows I’m hiding information. I speak. “You know what I am, you know what my kind can do, your actions are wise and I understand. I’ll tell you what you want to know, but I want to say it just to you.” I point the guards around me. It’s not like it’d be different if I say it just to her or in front of others, but I know that personal contact is more propitious to generate confidence. “Why should I trust you? “ Says the goddess. “You know I’m harmless to you, and you want to know something about me.” She makes a motion with her foreleg and the guards go away looking at me angrily. “Speak, but first, how you avoided me to read your mind?” She asks. “I didn’t think.” I answer instantly. “That does not explain why I couldn’t see your thoughts.” “I don’t have any.” She’s silent. I start to speak. “You know about my world. You know about the nature of my species. You’re not surprised with the fact that I know you and your city. Therefore you know about the show as well, so I’ll skip those details, your highness.” Her face shows a little surprise, but her expression is still severe. Normally nothing intimidates me, but we’re talking about a god. I have to be careful. “My name is not important, not even for me so call me as you please. I don’t know how I came here nor how to get back, I just want to be alive.” I make a little pause. “I can’t return you to your world, and I don’t know if I should allow you to live in this one.” Says the princess. I take a little breath. “Then I’ll talk about myself, and I hope to convince you that I’m not a threat. I won’t lie. I’m of the worst humans in my world, or at least that’s the common opinion. I’m a psychopath. I can’t feel anything for other beings and I don’t feel empathy. I don’t understand the difference between good and evil and I can enjoy others’ suffering without remorse. Not having social skills made me build my own behavior code and goals.” “You are not trying to inspire confidence, are you?” She says jokingly. “If I say something good about me, the lie would be obvious. The reason why I’m not a threat is because my code, my rules can be summarized in: Always decide what benefits to third.” The princess-goddess raises an eyebrow. “I decided to use my lack of feelings and hence my lack of hate to be a benign part of society.” Her horn glows again. This time I don’t hide information, in fact, I gift it to her. I called to my memories of the world and my opinions about it. It’s not like I hate my world. I can’t hate. I just consider it a waste of potential. I see people that can have good feelings for others and decide to have negative feelings. Those who are like me become harmful, my species could be so much more than it already is. I just can’t stand to such a waste. The voice of the goddess leaves its aggressive tone. “It seems like you don’t lie, but your nature is not benign.” I can’t deny that. “I understand your carefulness. I want to add that I don’t want to damage this world, you know that I know it through the show.” She nods. “It always have caught my attention the fact that you’re people… I mean, ponies live in the harmony I seek for my own kind. If I have to spend the rest of my life here, then I just want to learn from you. You’re an admirable species.” The ruler of Equestria is silent for a few seconds. I’m very impatient, my future is being decided. She opens her mouth. “You will live in the castle. You will sleep in the dungeon. You will interact only with those who are inside the castle. They will provide you food and cloth. If you prove that you are not a threat, you will be free. Otherwise if you hurt just one of my little ponies…” She doesn’t complete her sentence. I bow at her kneeling. “Thank you, your highness.” “I can’t just call you human. You can’t be treated like that for the castle personnel either. How do you want to be known?” She gets me to choose my name. Ok, let it be the word that more identifies me. “Reason.” Author's Note If you want to read the original version (in spanish), click here This isn't a dreamI wake up in my cell, it’s open. I’m not dreaming. I’m in Equestria. I spoke with Celestia and she almost kill me. Yesterday’s events come to my head. Canterlot is hygienic, spacious. It’s easy to see that its urban design is infinitely better compared to my world’s cities. It’s still weird to be in another world. I’ll get used to it. I met Celestia, an imposing and powerful being. So smart, protective and benignant that gave me a chance. I would condemn me to the gallows. She knows about my species, about the show. It was deductible. She’s not surprised with the fact that I know Canterlot and I didn’t freaked out when I saw what for me are very weird beings. I’m in Canterlot’s castle. This building’s architecture is unique. The cells are spacious, but they feel like a prison… I don’t know why I’m surprised, it is a dungeon. I go upstairs. I can see the stained glasses that decorate the walls. I recognize some of them and the stories they tell. “G-good morning, y-you must be Reason.” I see behind me an earth pony, is a female. Her fur is yellow and her mane is green and red intermingled. Her big and red eyes seem to fear me. “Good morning. Yes, I’m Reason. May I ask your name, young lady?” I wonder why I picked the word young. I don’t know her age, but she doesn’t look like she’s old. “I’m Lyn.” She answers. “I’m in charge to left the food in your cell… I mean bedroom.” “It is a cell. Don’t hesitate in calling it by its name.” “Uhm… Ok… Your clothes are being manufactured. I’ll let them in your… cell tomorrow.” “Thank you, Lyn.” I understand her fear at me, but I’d like to stop making them to fear me. I’d not be able to be accepted if they fear me. I failed once in adapting me in human society, I don’t want to fail again. Lyn left a basket in the cell and left the castle. I open the basket and beside some apples and desserts there’s a letter. “I’m conscious about your feeding habits. If you want to live here, you have to modify them. Princess Celestia.” I already knew that. I think I can do it. I eat something and go upstairs again. I see the exit to the backyard. I recognize some of the statues. I don’t want to be near this place. If my thinking frees Discord or any other being of its prison, I’ll lose my opportunity to live here. I explore the castle seeking for places of my interest and memorizing a map. To find the room that works as a bathroom was a priority, I won’t deny it. Luckily the building is not complicated and I found it very soon. I finish my task and find myself alone in the castle, lost in my thoughts. Ponies avoid me, I can’t blame them. I pass a few hours that way until I see someone who seems to be in a very similar condition than mine. Princess Luna descends from the sky and enters the castle as if nobody else were there. This ruler of Equestria emanates an aura very different from her sister. Her appearance is fragile. Her pose is not… How to say it? ... It doesn’t look… royal? “Princess Luna, your majesty.” I say. She opens her eyes as if she just woke up from a dream. “Hello, thou must be the human my sister told us about. Would thou kindly remind us thy name?” “Call me Reason, princess.” “Yes… Reason. What can we do for thee? What is the purpose of our conversation?” Damn, I didn’t think an excuse. And again, a lie would have no sense. “I don’t have a purpose. I just wanted to talk to you, her highness.” “None of our subjects have ever offered to talk to us. We art intrigued.” “My apologies if I offended you, your majesty. The truth is that when I saw you land, I thought I saw a lady who wanted to talk, but hasn’t with.” Damn! What I just said? I’m talking with a god just if I knew what’s in her mind! She looks down for a moment and then looks at my eyes. I think I’m going to be punished for my daring. She starts to laugh delicately. “Thou have not offended us. We art happy to have this conversation. It is just funny to us to hear those words. Nopony have ever wanted to talk to us.” Her manner of speaking is a bit confusing, but I think I understand her. I smile slightly. “You have a contagious laugh, your majesty.” She holds her laugh. “Thanks. It is strange to us to speak. Our ponies still fear us. We art interested in talking, but we do not know about what.” She makes a small pause. “Would thou mind to move to the garden? We would like to be able to see the sky and know when we have to do our duties.” I nod and follow her to the garden, there we sit down. We are in silence. I can appreciate her appearance. The anatomy of the distinct types of ponies is fascinating. She’s beautiful. In this world everything has a lack of details I dislike of my world. Everything you see in earth is uglier the nearer you are. Here that doesn’t happen. I better take off those thoughts. Remain stupefied while I watch a member of the royalty can be wrong. “What do thou want to talk about?” She breaks the silence. “Since I’m just a mortal, I don’t know what kind of topics of conversation may have a pony with your knowledge and wisdom.” I say. “Is there something you want to ask? Something you want to talk about?” “Yes, we have one doubt. Why thou have spoken to us?” “I imagine your sister has told you about my… condition.” She nods. “Well, this condition makes my acts be guided by what I consider correct, regardless everything else. I admit that talking with a princess and goddess of a universe is something intimidating, but talking with who seems to need words is correct.” “Do thou need words?” That’s a simple question with a lot of implications. “Yes, but I don’t talk to you nor to anyone to satisfy that need. Don’t get me wrong.” “We do not understand. If thou need something, why thou do not seek for it?” “If I focus in satisfy my own needs, I can forget to help others.” A gentle breeze blows above the garden moving her mane and my hair. She looks at the horizon for a while and then she looks at me. “We do not think thou art evil as everypony thinks. Thou art different, just that.” I wonder what I should be feeling in this moment. But I don’t feel anything; I just think that this is a great first step to be accepted. “The reason why they fear me is because I don’t feel. Everything is based in what I think. Someone normally would be happy at hearing those words. I just think that this is a good start. It seems to scare them.” “We have to admit that this is not common, but we art not scared.” Says the goddess. “Anyway, it is thy time to ask. We won’t accept a no for answer. We have asked, thou know that it is correct to ask to us.” Our first conversation and the alicorn uses my codes to control me. I should be upset, but I find it funny. “How have you created the harmony that reigns over Equestria?” “We have not created it. We just protect it. Harmony is a creation of the mortals.” “The idea of harmony being reachable without divine help is comforting. The idea of it having the protection of beings like you is even more reassuring.” The worst of this sentence is that it’s true, I didn’t lie. I could have lied, flatter her, make her confide in me just to be free. But instead I’m enjoying talking with a goddess. “Most of them express their conformity with our acts, even more with our sister’s. But just a few of them think in the facts. We are the guardians of their creation.” We are in silence again. It’s funny. I really have the need to talk and I noticed that Luna seems to share that need with me, but the time passes and this silence is just more and more long. But I don’t feel it uncomfortable and my need of talk is decreasing. “Maybe is not words but company.” We say at the same time. We smile to each other and keep in silence. The sunset is near. I’m about to witness for the very first time the creation of a night. Luna stands up and let the sun behind her. She closes her eyes while the expression of her face changes. She looks peaceful, motherly. A tenuous smile appears in her face. It’s like watching a painter mixing her palette. Her horn glows and in the horizon the tones of orange intermingle with the blue of the night whiles the moon rises itself. A minute later the sky is brighten just for the moon and stars, I can’t recognize any constellation. I’m in another world after all, so far away from anything I once knew. I don’t miss it. In fact, I think I can forget it without remorse. Not because this world is better, and I think it is, but because it’s not with me anymore. If it’s that easy for me to left anything behind, maybe now I understand why they see me as a monster. I left my thoughts behind. “Your majesty, your creation, the night is beautiful.” “We will ask thou two things.” Her voice sounds relaxed. “First, stop using royal terms with us. We never liked to be treated as more as we consider“. Another sentence with a lot of implications, I’ll think about it later. “Second, stop withholding thyself when thou ask. If thou ask something inappropriate we will tell thee. Thou have no reason to fear us, we don’t fear thee.” “Very well, Luna. Does this mean that we’re going to talk again?” “We admit that we want it.” In my world this kind of situations end with a hug, I always gave them. I never understood it at all, I just comprehend the protocol and the effect it had in others. I never understood what they were supposed to make me feel. I’m glad I’m in another world, maybe that confusing protocol doesn’t exist, and if it does I can say I don’t know it. We say goodbye and I go to sleep to my cell. The princess of the night definitely connects more with the mortals than the empress of the day does. I suppose that both are needed in so many ways to protect the harmony in this world. Anyway I’m just a mortal. I could never understand their reasons. Author's Note If you want to read the original version (in spanish), click here Writing Luna is complicated for me. Please tell me if I had mistakes in her dialogues. The importance of godI wake up when Lyn puts a food basket and some clothes in my cell. I get up. She freaks out for the sudden of my moves and closes her eyes in a defensive posture as if I was going to attack her. I don’t move because I don’t want to scare her. Her stomach growls and her belly trembles with a cartoonish move. I still don’t get used to this world, but I swear I will. “Are you hungry, Lyn?” I ask. She opens her eyes and blushes, and then nods. “I couldn’t have breakfast because I went to pick up the clothes Miss Rarity made for you.” Rarity made my clothes? Stop, stop, stop. This isn’t the moment to have a fanboy attack. I have to focus on who are near me. “Do you want to have breakfast with me? I’m unable to eat all this anyways.” I offer to the yellow mare. “I can’t. I have to attend my tasks. I don’t want to disappoint the princesses.” “You have taken an extra time to bring me the clothes in time. You deserve to have breakfast. I don’t think the princesses would mind, but if you have any problem I’ll take the responsibility.” “Ok… just for a few minutes.” She seems to fear me. I just want her to see that I’m a decent being and nothing will happen to her for being near me. I’d like to believe it too. We eat some apple cakes in silence. I admit that it’s a bit awkward to me, but Lyn seems to enjoy the food. “The apples from Sweet Apple Acres are my favorite.” She says. Sweet Apple Acres? I’m about to have another fanboy attack. This is on purpose. Celestia is testing me to prove that I’m a threat to the ponies I know through the show. I’m an obsessive brony, but that doesn’t affect the way I act. If she’s waiting me to show more interest than I should, to investigate, she’ll have to wait more. Is not like I don’t want to know more, but I know when the time is propitious to do things. Or at least I think so. “They are delicious.” I answer. We finish our breakfast without more conversation. I break the silence to say goodbye. “Forgive me for having such a silence breakfast. It’s just that I don’t know what to talk to you about. I hope you enjoyed the food, I for one enjoyed your company.” “Uhm… thanks Mister Reason. Maybe we can talk again later.” She leaves the dungeon. I focus my attention to the clothes. They’re very accurate to what I’m wearing. A t-shirt, a jacket, a pair of pants and underwear. How Rarity knows about the underwear? Maybe Celestia told her. The clothes are composed by white and black fabric forming soft geometric patterns that are not intrusive. I don’t know about fashion, but I do know that I like this. Time goes by. I take a bath, change my clothes and when I go out the bathroom I hear a crowd. I walk to one of the castle’s rooms and see a big crowd gathered in front of Celestia. She announces the end of the spring. The crowd organizes itself and one pony at a time goes to the throne to say something to the princess. It seems to be boring and tedious, but I notice the importance of this. It’s not just a politic act. It’s a whole religious ceremony where everypony can talk to their god. I imagine that for Celestia this must be a boring and hard task, but she just smiles and listens to every single pony. She takes this task knowing what I just noticed. This kind of acts gives to Equestria a sensation of order, reaffirms their faith and gives them sense to their lives. It’s like when a human says he was in the presence of a saint, but this world can see their god and talk to her. The queue moves really fast. When the last of the ponies talk to the princess, I’m the only one in the queue. I talk to her with honesty. Just with my honest opinion. “I start to understand the importance of your presence and actions in this world. I respect you even more, Princess Celestia. In my world it’s common to doubt about the authority of our rulers, to doubt about their intentions. And it’s common to doubt about the existence of god and his intentions. If my world had someone like you, maybe we wouldn’t be so screwed.” As any other pony, I bow at her and start to go back to my cell. Her voice stops me. “It is not common that somepony tells me something without appreciation or fear. I thank to you.” “It’s nothing, your majesty. I couldn’t give a comment influenced by that kind of things even if I wanted.” In the way to my cell I meet Lyn. She seems to be less scared of me. I ask her for a place where I can clean my clothes and she answers. I return to my cell. Once there, I fall into my thoughts again. I’m completely sure now that I won’t get back to my own world. Here my role is different. I have to fit in this world and modify my goals. In my world I wanted to find a way to make the perfect society, but I’m in the perfect society now. I’m the only imperfect being here, that’s why I’m in a cell. Now my goal is even more difficult; Find a way to fit in this world without ruining it. Ruin this beauty would be unforgivable. I see the sunset turns into night through the small window. It’s not that impressive if I don’t see Luna’s expression. Author's Note If you want to read the original version (in spanish), click here The three votesDays go by without changes. I share my food with Lyn and we talk about the castle and Equestria in general. We tried to talk about my world but the subject turned too much unpleasant to her, so we dropped it. Ponies don’t avoid me anymore but they don’t seek me either, just like in my world. I have so many interesting conversations with Luna about our worlds; the similarities and differences between our nights is a constant topic. It has been 30 days since I came here. I think that maybe it’s wrong that I don’t feel anything because I’m not in my world anymore. It’s just my place of origin; I was never linked to it. I don’t think I’m more linked to Equestria either. It’s just that I live here now. If when I lived there I was thinking in other worlds more than the one I’m in, I would get fired and life could have been tough. Here is the same thing. I wake up. The food basket is at my right. I eat something and walk through the castle with no things to do. The voice of the princess of the night stops my monotonous walk. “This time it is our turn to invite thee to a conversation.” It’s weird but I learned to enjoy her presence. I thought that the fact that she’s a god would impede it; I think it’s good I was wrong with that. “What’s the matter, Luna?” I’m calling a god for her informal name. That really fascinates me. Maybe the ponies are used to live near gods, but as a human this is a unique experience. “We want to talk about a serious subject. We have to ask thee something. And since we consider thee as a friend, thou will be able to ask us anything and we will answer thee with all our honesty.” Friendship… I can’t feel that but I think I can understand it. In order to live in my world I created some kind of guidance definition: Bond of confidence justified (or not) between two or more people. Once established the friendship relation, these people grant privileges to each other that they can’t grant to other people who don’t posses this link. If I change the word “people” for “intelligent beings” the definition still works in this world. “Very well, Luna. What do you want to know about me?” “We want thee to tell us about thy own. Not about the humans but the people like thee. Plus our sister mentioned us something about thy rules and we want to know them and their reasons.” Hiding things has no sense. I mean, she could just make me tell her the answers but she has respect for privacy. Namely, I’m definitely inferior at her. I don’t know if I would do the same in her place. That just proves how far of my compression is the superiority and goodness of this equine god. Plus we’re friends. I suppose that our compression of friendship is different too, but my definition of friendship is different from the definition of the people in earth and that never stopped me to relate with others. I must trust her. “Very well.” I’ll try to be brief but not skip any important detail. “They think that people like me are part of the one per cent of the total people in my world, but it’s impossible to know it exactly. This is because we hide from the others who are not like us, because they would exclude us; and we hide from those who are like us, because we know how harmful we can be. “As you know, we can’t feel anything for others nor empathy. This doesn’t mean that I can’t feel happiness, sadness, loneliness, etc. It just means that I can’t feel that for others. If someone feels something for me, I just see it as a situation, as an object, as a nature phenomenon; not in the way you see it. In fact, we can’t comprehend the way you see your world, to us everything is circumstances, objects and phenomena.” She stares at me. “Due to this fact, we don’t have moral nor remorse, and we don’t differentiate the good and evil in the same way. Every single person like me generates their own train of thought that creates their own definition of good and evil and their own codes and rules. “Many people like me create their rules to beneficiate themselves. The only rule they truly follow is that one which benefits them. They’re selfish, inconsiderate and harmful. I can’t tell them that that’s wrong because I understand them.” Luna’s face expresses the duality, the doubt if trust in my person or heed my words. “Nevertheless, I created my own rules in order to seek something better.” Her face changed. I hope that means that she took the first option. “I think that the rules that most of them follow leave a forgettable and pathetic legacy. I want to be remembered by people.” Should I say ponies? “As someone profitable to the world. I can be that one. Yes, I admit that the harmful things, to do them, to live them please me. I like to hurt!” The expression in her face indicates me that I better explain it. “But I must and I can overcome that. As well as I can’t feel love or friendship, I can’t feel hate or rancor. “Every social relation has been studied by me in order to act as the best friend and neighbor, as the best person.” Should I say pony? “Maybe I’ll never understand how they see the world, but I want them to remember me as someone who made them see the world as something better. “That’s why my rules are simple.” My voice is louder. “Make happy as much of them as you can.” Louder. “Take care of their problems!” Louder. “Take care of them when they need you! Don’t worry about yourself!” LOUDER. “Your needs are harmful! If they ever be satisfied it will be by someone who shares your rules! If not…” I shout. “SHUT THE FUCK UP!” The scene itself was theatrical; I didn’t do it with intentions to manipulate. Well, maybe I wanted to impress, is it that bad? Anyway, everything I said is the honest truth. And the way I said it represents the strong of those ideas to me. “…” Silence is her answer. “My turn.” My voice is calm again. “How does it feel to give up at the darkness of your being?” Obviously my question refers to the moments she was Nightmare Moon. Maybe I shouldn’t have asked something that deep, that sort of things can bother those who don’t share my condition. But she told me I can ask her anything and I certainly am intrigued in how it’d feel to ignore my rules and just follow what my nature tells me. Luna looks down and then stares at my eyes. “It feels good, but it is not worth.” She answers with a sad tone. “I’m glad you tell me that.” I admit that the answer makes me generate some crossed ideas. [It feels good.] Those words are too much tempting. I’ve never did something I can tell that feels good. As much as I tried to fit in my world’s society, I never reached the point where the slightest of my achievements was worth the effort I put in them. Therefore, I don’t know how it is to feel good. And I’m VERY interested in know how it feels. Luna smiles. “Let’s go to our sister’s chamber. Lyn and we have voted for thy behalf. She said she would vote the same way if we coincide. Thou will be free.” Great, she trusts me and I’m getting closer to my dark side. It is this kind of relationships that ruin my world. I can’t let my nature to take the control, not now, not in another world. Different challenges, different achievements. Fitting in a world that is perfect per se is a bigger achievement that fitting in a chaotic world as mine. Here I’ll can find satisfaction in my actions. Heh, I wish I could believe in those thoughts. Anyway, I’ve been here for a month. A month I spent trying to gain an opportunity to fit in Equestria; the world a month ago if someone told me it exists I would laugh at the face of who told me that. This is a life opportunity as a human, as a psychopath, as a brony. I won’t waste it for a stupid doubt. “Is anything wrong?” Asks Luna. “I’ll tell you my thoughts later.” I answer. She could have read my mind, distrust me and send me to whatever the place would be my destiny if I don’t get my freedom. The least I can do to return her that confidence is to tell her, but I don’t have the courage to say it right now. I fear the consequences. Plus, watching the 6 main characters of the show have helped me to control my nature in my world. What I learn from them in this one may have the same effect. I’ll tell Luna about this when I dominate my problem. Well, I call it a problem just to psych myself that it is a problem. I don’t really know if my nature is a problem or not. If my thoughts and knowledge are correct, Celestia will send me to Ponyville. It’s the most logic. The Elements of Harmony, the only magic that it’s more powerful than the princesses is there. Besides, Spike can report her about my behavior more effectively than anything else. I MUST find a way to control my thoughts, maybe there I can. I hope I can. We walk into a castle’s chamber, Lyn’s there. Celestia speaks. “Luna, have you decided your vote?” “We have decided that Reason deserves to be free. We consider that he is not a threat to Equestria.” I wish I had so much confidence, I don’t really know if she really trusts me that much. The princess of the sun speaks again. “Lyn, you have had more contact with him than any other pony in the castle. Should he be free?” “Yes, my princess.” “What is your fundament?” “I shared time with him. He wasn't the danger he says he is. In fact, he was very kind with me.” What an interesting pony, we barely talked about deep subjects and she trusts in me. Is everypony else in Equestria like that? If I wanted I could have convinced her about anything else. I don’t have anything against her, but I’m more close to Luna. Don’t blame me; I move by logic and logically a divine being is more interesting and influential than someone who doesn’t highlight from the average. I watch her cutie mark, two white circles. I don’t know what they mean, maybe I’ll ask her someday. I smile to her and she smiles at me. “As I promised, since there are two ponies disposed to free you, I will be the third.” Proclaim Celestia. “Thank you very much, princess.” “You will be sent to Ponyville to live with the bearers of the Elements of Harmony. I know you know them, so it will not be necessary to explain anything about them.” I smile at the sight that I was right, come on, predict a god is something I can be proud of. But maybe she only did me the favor of agree with me only to bother me. I think she can do that. “May I ask you something, princess?” I ask and she looks at me. “I want you for any reason you suggest, order or recommend to any pony or intelligent being to have any kind of treat to me. I want to ask it to your sister too.” I watch Luna for a moment and look at Celestia again. “I pretend to fit in this society to learn about harmony. Having any advantage from their rulers that affect their way to treat me would damage the information I could obtain and my insertion would be forced and unnatural. I want to come there as a common outsider and gain my place on my own.” “I insist that the Elements of Harmony should know you.” She really tries to watch me. “I don’t have objections. I will introduce myself to them when I get there. Just put me in front of them but I don’t want them to act in a determined way by order or advice of yours or Luna’s… My apologies, Princess Luna’s” “Very well, and since you are that interested in study harmony…” I look at her expectant. “I want you to send me your progress, and since you don’t want me to ask Spike to help you, I’ll let you to gain his help or find your way on your own.” Another way to watch me. It’s ok, I can’t blame her to try to protect her world. In a couple of hours I took my clothes, I packed them in a bag and went to say goodbye to Lyn. “Good bye, Lyn. It’s time for me to leave and try to comprehend your world. I promise I’ll come back to see you and the next time I’ll invite you to have lunch.” She smiles and speaks with her shyness. “That would be nice. I’ll miss you. Send me a letter when you can, please.” She seems to have a big link to me considering the short time we spent together. I respect that. “I will, but it won’t be so often. I get lost in my mind frequently; in the real world it’s easier to me to get lost.” We laugh. “Take care, Reason.” “You too, Lyn.” I can’t ignore how quickly I got used to my new name. I walk to the garden and talk with Luna, she’s there to teleport me to Ponyville. “Art thou ready? The bearers of the Elements are gathered in thy destiny. Our sister told them to know thee and thy name, nothing else.” “I’m ready. I’m thankful that she did me that favor.” “We will visit thee some nights. We hope thou do not mind.” “Of course not, you’re my friend.” I don’t lie, but that was an order, not a question… You know what? Do you remember when I said she trusted me? Now I know that she really doesn’t. I don’t appreciate her less for that, prudence is something valuable. I’m being teleported. Now I’m in front of the mane six. I know, call them that way in this world would be stupid. They stare at me as if I was some kind of weirdo. Well, I have to admit it. Here I’m a weirdo. It’s time to introduce myself. Author's Note If you want to read the original version (in spanish), click here And finally what all have been waiting for! The mane six!
Fit in or DieI appeared in Equestria, I don’t know how nor when, I remember I was going out the mall with the rice pack that would be my dinner. In the very next instant, I’m in this over colored world and I recognize Canterlot’s city in the distance. Following the white brick-made path I walk in that direction. The landscape is very accurate to the show, the emerald green grass, the huge plains that extend to the sides, some multi-sized shrubbery that decorate the sides of the road. That’s the most logic right now, keep in the known. Just if I knew this world, why, I can’t even be sure that this is Equestria, but in lack of something else to compare it, it’s identical to the show I love. Something is certain, I see roads and a city. There is intelligence. My head is filled up with thoughts. This is impossible. I correct, this is unlikely. Physically everything is possible, but some events are very unlikely. I’m not a physicist, but there’s the existence of a world very similar to a show of my world. Assuming that I’m in other world. This can be another dimension, well, it’s not like knowing it can have a practical purpose. I see a pegasus flying over me. I hide in a shrub in a side of the road. My theory is that I’m in Equestria, that sounds a little more plausible. Well, I start to gather facts in my head. -This may or may not be a dream. -If this is a dream I’ll wake up and nothing has sense. -If this is not a dream I need an action plan, quick. Just to prevent, I start to build a plan. -If this is a hostile world, or universe, or dimension, I’ll not survive for a long time. -If in the other hand this is Equestria, or at least it’s populated by kind beings, I have to fit in this society. I opt to think in the second option. If this is a hostile world, there won’t be anything to do anyways, not without armament and supplies. I walk until the path meets the city’s doors, the architecture reminds me to the show. Maybe I lost my mind, whatever it is, if I can’t trust in my senses I don’t have anything to trust in. I get into Canterlot. I see ponies, or at least, creatures with an outstanding similarity with the characters of my favorite show. I still had my doubts about being in Equestria, but then some of them hid and exclaimed “For Celestia, What’s that?!” Should I be surprised that they speak my language? Or it’s me who speak their language? My theory was confirmed, but I have no time to feel happy. I’m in Equestria. In this place god exists, is alive and lives in this city, and I’m scaring the people. To this moment I was keeping me incredulous and cold. Now I have fear, a very rational fear. Guards surround me, despite these beings does not exceed the height of my chest, when they push me, they prove to be stronger than me. I don’t resist. I don’t want problems. Even if I could fight the guards, I have nothing to do in a strange world and with all its population and gods against me. Author's Note If you want to read the original version (in spanish), click here.
A psycopath in EquestriaThey escort me to the royal building, the princess is waiting for me. Obviously she had been informed about my presence, her height is slightly lower than mine. Her appearance is imposing. I’m in the presence of a goddess. I’m in a throne room. Princess Celestia exists, this world exists and I’m here. Some people would be happy with this. For me it means that something changed, everything changed. I’m in an alternate reality, I’m lucky I have data about this reality, but I’m still going to be judged by the most powerful being of this world. The guards force me to kneel. You don’t notice the intimidating they are until you watch them do their job from my point view. I focus on don’t think. Think can be dangerous. She speaks, her voice is firm and aggressive. “Human, I know what you are, explain your presence in my domains.“ My mind’s still focusing on don’t think. “I don’t know how I came here and I don’t know what I want to do either.“ Her horn glows but nothing happens and I don’t feel anything. I notice. She’s trying to read my mind. She opens her eyes in surprise. She knows that I know it. She knows I have my mind blank. She knows I’m hiding information. I speak. “You know what I am, you know what my kind can do, your actions are wise and I understand. I’ll tell you what you want to know, but I want to say it just to you.” I point the guards around me. It’s not like it’d be different if I say it just to her or in front of others, but I know that personal contact is more propitious to generate confidence. “Why should I trust you? “ Says the goddess. “You know I’m harmless to you, and you want to know something about me.” She makes a motion with her foreleg and the guards go away looking at me angrily. “Speak, but first, how you avoided me to read your mind?” She asks. “I didn’t think.” I answer instantly. “That does not explain why I couldn’t see your thoughts.” “I don’t have any.” She’s silent. I start to speak. “You know about my world. You know about the nature of my species. You’re not surprised with the fact that I know you and your city. Therefore you know about the show as well, so I’ll skip those details, your highness.” Her face shows a little surprise, but her expression is still severe. Normally nothing intimidates me, but we’re talking about a god. I have to be careful. “My name is not important, not even for me so call me as you please. I don’t know how I came here nor how to get back, I just want to be alive.” I make a little pause. “I can’t return you to your world, and I don’t know if I should allow you to live in this one.” Says the princess. I take a little breath. “Then I’ll talk about myself, and I hope to convince you that I’m not a threat. I won’t lie. I’m of the worst humans in my world, or at least that’s the common opinion. I’m a psychopath. I can’t feel anything for other beings and I don’t feel empathy. I don’t understand the difference between good and evil and I can enjoy others’ suffering without remorse. Not having social skills made me build my own behavior code and goals.” “You are not trying to inspire confidence, are you?” She says jokingly. “If I say something good about me, the lie would be obvious. The reason why I’m not a threat is because my code, my rules can be summarized in: Always decide what benefits to third.” The princess-goddess raises an eyebrow. “I decided to use my lack of feelings and hence my lack of hate to be a benign part of society.” Her horn glows again. This time I don’t hide information, in fact, I gift it to her. I called to my memories of the world and my opinions about it. It’s not like I hate my world. I can’t hate. I just consider it a waste of potential. I see people that can have good feelings for others and decide to have negative feelings. Those who are like me become harmful, my species could be so much more than it already is. I just can’t stand to such a waste. The voice of the goddess leaves its aggressive tone. “It seems like you don’t lie, but your nature is not benign.” I can’t deny that. “I understand your carefulness. I want to add that I don’t want to damage this world, you know that I know it through the show.” She nods. “It always have caught my attention the fact that you’re people… I mean, ponies live in the harmony I seek for my own kind. If I have to spend the rest of my life here, then I just want to learn from you. You’re an admirable species.” The ruler of Equestria is silent for a few seconds. I’m very impatient, my future is being decided. She opens her mouth. “You will live in the castle. You will sleep in the dungeon. You will interact only with those who are inside the castle. They will provide you food and cloth. If you prove that you are not a threat, you will be free. Otherwise if you hurt just one of my little ponies…” She doesn’t complete her sentence. I bow at her kneeling. “Thank you, your highness.” “I can’t just call you human. You can’t be treated like that for the castle personnel either. How do you want to be known?” She gets me to choose my name. Ok, let it be the word that more identifies me. “Reason.” Author's Note If you want to read the original version (in spanish), click here
This isn't a dreamI wake up in my cell, it’s open. I’m not dreaming. I’m in Equestria. I spoke with Celestia and she almost kill me. Yesterday’s events come to my head. Canterlot is hygienic, spacious. It’s easy to see that its urban design is infinitely better compared to my world’s cities. It’s still weird to be in another world. I’ll get used to it. I met Celestia, an imposing and powerful being. So smart, protective and benignant that gave me a chance. I would condemn me to the gallows. She knows about my species, about the show. It was deductible. She’s not surprised with the fact that I know Canterlot and I didn’t freaked out when I saw what for me are very weird beings. I’m in Canterlot’s castle. This building’s architecture is unique. The cells are spacious, but they feel like a prison… I don’t know why I’m surprised, it is a dungeon. I go upstairs. I can see the stained glasses that decorate the walls. I recognize some of them and the stories they tell. “G-good morning, y-you must be Reason.” I see behind me an earth pony, is a female. Her fur is yellow and her mane is green and red intermingled. Her big and red eyes seem to fear me. “Good morning. Yes, I’m Reason. May I ask your name, young lady?” I wonder why I picked the word young. I don’t know her age, but she doesn’t look like she’s old. “I’m Lyn.” She answers. “I’m in charge to left the food in your cell… I mean bedroom.” “It is a cell. Don’t hesitate in calling it by its name.” “Uhm… Ok… Your clothes are being manufactured. I’ll let them in your… cell tomorrow.” “Thank you, Lyn.” I understand her fear at me, but I’d like to stop making them to fear me. I’d not be able to be accepted if they fear me. I failed once in adapting me in human society, I don’t want to fail again. Lyn left a basket in the cell and left the castle. I open the basket and beside some apples and desserts there’s a letter. “I’m conscious about your feeding habits. If you want to live here, you have to modify them. Princess Celestia.” I already knew that. I think I can do it. I eat something and go upstairs again. I see the exit to the backyard. I recognize some of the statues. I don’t want to be near this place. If my thinking frees Discord or any other being of its prison, I’ll lose my opportunity to live here. I explore the castle seeking for places of my interest and memorizing a map. To find the room that works as a bathroom was a priority, I won’t deny it. Luckily the building is not complicated and I found it very soon. I finish my task and find myself alone in the castle, lost in my thoughts. Ponies avoid me, I can’t blame them. I pass a few hours that way until I see someone who seems to be in a very similar condition than mine. Princess Luna descends from the sky and enters the castle as if nobody else were there. This ruler of Equestria emanates an aura very different from her sister. Her appearance is fragile. Her pose is not… How to say it? ... It doesn’t look… royal? “Princess Luna, your majesty.” I say. She opens her eyes as if she just woke up from a dream. “Hello, thou must be the human my sister told us about. Would thou kindly remind us thy name?” “Call me Reason, princess.” “Yes… Reason. What can we do for thee? What is the purpose of our conversation?” Damn, I didn’t think an excuse. And again, a lie would have no sense. “I don’t have a purpose. I just wanted to talk to you, her highness.” “None of our subjects have ever offered to talk to us. We art intrigued.” “My apologies if I offended you, your majesty. The truth is that when I saw you land, I thought I saw a lady who wanted to talk, but hasn’t with.” Damn! What I just said? I’m talking with a god just if I knew what’s in her mind! She looks down for a moment and then looks at my eyes. I think I’m going to be punished for my daring. She starts to laugh delicately. “Thou have not offended us. We art happy to have this conversation. It is just funny to us to hear those words. Nopony have ever wanted to talk to us.” Her manner of speaking is a bit confusing, but I think I understand her. I smile slightly. “You have a contagious laugh, your majesty.” She holds her laugh. “Thanks. It is strange to us to speak. Our ponies still fear us. We art interested in talking, but we do not know about what.” She makes a small pause. “Would thou mind to move to the garden? We would like to be able to see the sky and know when we have to do our duties.” I nod and follow her to the garden, there we sit down. We are in silence. I can appreciate her appearance. The anatomy of the distinct types of ponies is fascinating. She’s beautiful. In this world everything has a lack of details I dislike of my world. Everything you see in earth is uglier the nearer you are. Here that doesn’t happen. I better take off those thoughts. Remain stupefied while I watch a member of the royalty can be wrong. “What do thou want to talk about?” She breaks the silence. “Since I’m just a mortal, I don’t know what kind of topics of conversation may have a pony with your knowledge and wisdom.” I say. “Is there something you want to ask? Something you want to talk about?” “Yes, we have one doubt. Why thou have spoken to us?” “I imagine your sister has told you about my… condition.” She nods. “Well, this condition makes my acts be guided by what I consider correct, regardless everything else. I admit that talking with a princess and goddess of a universe is something intimidating, but talking with who seems to need words is correct.” “Do thou need words?” That’s a simple question with a lot of implications. “Yes, but I don’t talk to you nor to anyone to satisfy that need. Don’t get me wrong.” “We do not understand. If thou need something, why thou do not seek for it?” “If I focus in satisfy my own needs, I can forget to help others.” A gentle breeze blows above the garden moving her mane and my hair. She looks at the horizon for a while and then she looks at me. “We do not think thou art evil as everypony thinks. Thou art different, just that.” I wonder what I should be feeling in this moment. But I don’t feel anything; I just think that this is a great first step to be accepted. “The reason why they fear me is because I don’t feel. Everything is based in what I think. Someone normally would be happy at hearing those words. I just think that this is a good start. It seems to scare them.” “We have to admit that this is not common, but we art not scared.” Says the goddess. “Anyway, it is thy time to ask. We won’t accept a no for answer. We have asked, thou know that it is correct to ask to us.” Our first conversation and the alicorn uses my codes to control me. I should be upset, but I find it funny. “How have you created the harmony that reigns over Equestria?” “We have not created it. We just protect it. Harmony is a creation of the mortals.” “The idea of harmony being reachable without divine help is comforting. The idea of it having the protection of beings like you is even more reassuring.” The worst of this sentence is that it’s true, I didn’t lie. I could have lied, flatter her, make her confide in me just to be free. But instead I’m enjoying talking with a goddess. “Most of them express their conformity with our acts, even more with our sister’s. But just a few of them think in the facts. We are the guardians of their creation.” We are in silence again. It’s funny. I really have the need to talk and I noticed that Luna seems to share that need with me, but the time passes and this silence is just more and more long. But I don’t feel it uncomfortable and my need of talk is decreasing. “Maybe is not words but company.” We say at the same time. We smile to each other and keep in silence. The sunset is near. I’m about to witness for the very first time the creation of a night. Luna stands up and let the sun behind her. She closes her eyes while the expression of her face changes. She looks peaceful, motherly. A tenuous smile appears in her face. It’s like watching a painter mixing her palette. Her horn glows and in the horizon the tones of orange intermingle with the blue of the night whiles the moon rises itself. A minute later the sky is brighten just for the moon and stars, I can’t recognize any constellation. I’m in another world after all, so far away from anything I once knew. I don’t miss it. In fact, I think I can forget it without remorse. Not because this world is better, and I think it is, but because it’s not with me anymore. If it’s that easy for me to left anything behind, maybe now I understand why they see me as a monster. I left my thoughts behind. “Your majesty, your creation, the night is beautiful.” “We will ask thou two things.” Her voice sounds relaxed. “First, stop using royal terms with us. We never liked to be treated as more as we consider“. Another sentence with a lot of implications, I’ll think about it later. “Second, stop withholding thyself when thou ask. If thou ask something inappropriate we will tell thee. Thou have no reason to fear us, we don’t fear thee.” “Very well, Luna. Does this mean that we’re going to talk again?” “We admit that we want it.” In my world this kind of situations end with a hug, I always gave them. I never understood it at all, I just comprehend the protocol and the effect it had in others. I never understood what they were supposed to make me feel. I’m glad I’m in another world, maybe that confusing protocol doesn’t exist, and if it does I can say I don’t know it. We say goodbye and I go to sleep to my cell. The princess of the night definitely connects more with the mortals than the empress of the day does. I suppose that both are needed in so many ways to protect the harmony in this world. Anyway I’m just a mortal. I could never understand their reasons. Author's Note If you want to read the original version (in spanish), click here Writing Luna is complicated for me. Please tell me if I had mistakes in her dialogues.
The importance of godI wake up when Lyn puts a food basket and some clothes in my cell. I get up. She freaks out for the sudden of my moves and closes her eyes in a defensive posture as if I was going to attack her. I don’t move because I don’t want to scare her. Her stomach growls and her belly trembles with a cartoonish move. I still don’t get used to this world, but I swear I will. “Are you hungry, Lyn?” I ask. She opens her eyes and blushes, and then nods. “I couldn’t have breakfast because I went to pick up the clothes Miss Rarity made for you.” Rarity made my clothes? Stop, stop, stop. This isn’t the moment to have a fanboy attack. I have to focus on who are near me. “Do you want to have breakfast with me? I’m unable to eat all this anyways.” I offer to the yellow mare. “I can’t. I have to attend my tasks. I don’t want to disappoint the princesses.” “You have taken an extra time to bring me the clothes in time. You deserve to have breakfast. I don’t think the princesses would mind, but if you have any problem I’ll take the responsibility.” “Ok… just for a few minutes.” She seems to fear me. I just want her to see that I’m a decent being and nothing will happen to her for being near me. I’d like to believe it too. We eat some apple cakes in silence. I admit that it’s a bit awkward to me, but Lyn seems to enjoy the food. “The apples from Sweet Apple Acres are my favorite.” She says. Sweet Apple Acres? I’m about to have another fanboy attack. This is on purpose. Celestia is testing me to prove that I’m a threat to the ponies I know through the show. I’m an obsessive brony, but that doesn’t affect the way I act. If she’s waiting me to show more interest than I should, to investigate, she’ll have to wait more. Is not like I don’t want to know more, but I know when the time is propitious to do things. Or at least I think so. “They are delicious.” I answer. We finish our breakfast without more conversation. I break the silence to say goodbye. “Forgive me for having such a silence breakfast. It’s just that I don’t know what to talk to you about. I hope you enjoyed the food, I for one enjoyed your company.” “Uhm… thanks Mister Reason. Maybe we can talk again later.” She leaves the dungeon. I focus my attention to the clothes. They’re very accurate to what I’m wearing. A t-shirt, a jacket, a pair of pants and underwear. How Rarity knows about the underwear? Maybe Celestia told her. The clothes are composed by white and black fabric forming soft geometric patterns that are not intrusive. I don’t know about fashion, but I do know that I like this. Time goes by. I take a bath, change my clothes and when I go out the bathroom I hear a crowd. I walk to one of the castle’s rooms and see a big crowd gathered in front of Celestia. She announces the end of the spring. The crowd organizes itself and one pony at a time goes to the throne to say something to the princess. It seems to be boring and tedious, but I notice the importance of this. It’s not just a politic act. It’s a whole religious ceremony where everypony can talk to their god. I imagine that for Celestia this must be a boring and hard task, but she just smiles and listens to every single pony. She takes this task knowing what I just noticed. This kind of acts gives to Equestria a sensation of order, reaffirms their faith and gives them sense to their lives. It’s like when a human says he was in the presence of a saint, but this world can see their god and talk to her. The queue moves really fast. When the last of the ponies talk to the princess, I’m the only one in the queue. I talk to her with honesty. Just with my honest opinion. “I start to understand the importance of your presence and actions in this world. I respect you even more, Princess Celestia. In my world it’s common to doubt about the authority of our rulers, to doubt about their intentions. And it’s common to doubt about the existence of god and his intentions. If my world had someone like you, maybe we wouldn’t be so screwed.” As any other pony, I bow at her and start to go back to my cell. Her voice stops me. “It is not common that somepony tells me something without appreciation or fear. I thank to you.” “It’s nothing, your majesty. I couldn’t give a comment influenced by that kind of things even if I wanted.” In the way to my cell I meet Lyn. She seems to be less scared of me. I ask her for a place where I can clean my clothes and she answers. I return to my cell. Once there, I fall into my thoughts again. I’m completely sure now that I won’t get back to my own world. Here my role is different. I have to fit in this world and modify my goals. In my world I wanted to find a way to make the perfect society, but I’m in the perfect society now. I’m the only imperfect being here, that’s why I’m in a cell. Now my goal is even more difficult; Find a way to fit in this world without ruining it. Ruin this beauty would be unforgivable. I see the sunset turns into night through the small window. It’s not that impressive if I don’t see Luna’s expression. Author's Note If you want to read the original version (in spanish), click here
The three votesDays go by without changes. I share my food with Lyn and we talk about the castle and Equestria in general. We tried to talk about my world but the subject turned too much unpleasant to her, so we dropped it. Ponies don’t avoid me anymore but they don’t seek me either, just like in my world. I have so many interesting conversations with Luna about our worlds; the similarities and differences between our nights is a constant topic. It has been 30 days since I came here. I think that maybe it’s wrong that I don’t feel anything because I’m not in my world anymore. It’s just my place of origin; I was never linked to it. I don’t think I’m more linked to Equestria either. It’s just that I live here now. If when I lived there I was thinking in other worlds more than the one I’m in, I would get fired and life could have been tough. Here is the same thing. I wake up. The food basket is at my right. I eat something and walk through the castle with no things to do. The voice of the princess of the night stops my monotonous walk. “This time it is our turn to invite thee to a conversation.” It’s weird but I learned to enjoy her presence. I thought that the fact that she’s a god would impede it; I think it’s good I was wrong with that. “What’s the matter, Luna?” I’m calling a god for her informal name. That really fascinates me. Maybe the ponies are used to live near gods, but as a human this is a unique experience. “We want to talk about a serious subject. We have to ask thee something. And since we consider thee as a friend, thou will be able to ask us anything and we will answer thee with all our honesty.” Friendship… I can’t feel that but I think I can understand it. In order to live in my world I created some kind of guidance definition: Bond of confidence justified (or not) between two or more people. Once established the friendship relation, these people grant privileges to each other that they can’t grant to other people who don’t posses this link. If I change the word “people” for “intelligent beings” the definition still works in this world. “Very well, Luna. What do you want to know about me?” “We want thee to tell us about thy own. Not about the humans but the people like thee. Plus our sister mentioned us something about thy rules and we want to know them and their reasons.” Hiding things has no sense. I mean, she could just make me tell her the answers but she has respect for privacy. Namely, I’m definitely inferior at her. I don’t know if I would do the same in her place. That just proves how far of my compression is the superiority and goodness of this equine god. Plus we’re friends. I suppose that our compression of friendship is different too, but my definition of friendship is different from the definition of the people in earth and that never stopped me to relate with others. I must trust her. “Very well.” I’ll try to be brief but not skip any important detail. “They think that people like me are part of the one per cent of the total people in my world, but it’s impossible to know it exactly. This is because we hide from the others who are not like us, because they would exclude us; and we hide from those who are like us, because we know how harmful we can be. “As you know, we can’t feel anything for others nor empathy. This doesn’t mean that I can’t feel happiness, sadness, loneliness, etc. It just means that I can’t feel that for others. If someone feels something for me, I just see it as a situation, as an object, as a nature phenomenon; not in the way you see it. In fact, we can’t comprehend the way you see your world, to us everything is circumstances, objects and phenomena.” She stares at me. “Due to this fact, we don’t have moral nor remorse, and we don’t differentiate the good and evil in the same way. Every single person like me generates their own train of thought that creates their own definition of good and evil and their own codes and rules. “Many people like me create their rules to beneficiate themselves. The only rule they truly follow is that one which benefits them. They’re selfish, inconsiderate and harmful. I can’t tell them that that’s wrong because I understand them.” Luna’s face expresses the duality, the doubt if trust in my person or heed my words. “Nevertheless, I created my own rules in order to seek something better.” Her face changed. I hope that means that she took the first option. “I think that the rules that most of them follow leave a forgettable and pathetic legacy. I want to be remembered by people.” Should I say ponies? “As someone profitable to the world. I can be that one. Yes, I admit that the harmful things, to do them, to live them please me. I like to hurt!” The expression in her face indicates me that I better explain it. “But I must and I can overcome that. As well as I can’t feel love or friendship, I can’t feel hate or rancor. “Every social relation has been studied by me in order to act as the best friend and neighbor, as the best person.” Should I say pony? “Maybe I’ll never understand how they see the world, but I want them to remember me as someone who made them see the world as something better. “That’s why my rules are simple.” My voice is louder. “Make happy as much of them as you can.” Louder. “Take care of their problems!” Louder. “Take care of them when they need you! Don’t worry about yourself!” LOUDER. “Your needs are harmful! If they ever be satisfied it will be by someone who shares your rules! If not…” I shout. “SHUT THE FUCK UP!” The scene itself was theatrical; I didn’t do it with intentions to manipulate. Well, maybe I wanted to impress, is it that bad? Anyway, everything I said is the honest truth. And the way I said it represents the strong of those ideas to me. “…” Silence is her answer. “My turn.” My voice is calm again. “How does it feel to give up at the darkness of your being?” Obviously my question refers to the moments she was Nightmare Moon. Maybe I shouldn’t have asked something that deep, that sort of things can bother those who don’t share my condition. But she told me I can ask her anything and I certainly am intrigued in how it’d feel to ignore my rules and just follow what my nature tells me. Luna looks down and then stares at my eyes. “It feels good, but it is not worth.” She answers with a sad tone. “I’m glad you tell me that.” I admit that the answer makes me generate some crossed ideas. [It feels good.] Those words are too much tempting. I’ve never did something I can tell that feels good. As much as I tried to fit in my world’s society, I never reached the point where the slightest of my achievements was worth the effort I put in them. Therefore, I don’t know how it is to feel good. And I’m VERY interested in know how it feels. Luna smiles. “Let’s go to our sister’s chamber. Lyn and we have voted for thy behalf. She said she would vote the same way if we coincide. Thou will be free.” Great, she trusts me and I’m getting closer to my dark side. It is this kind of relationships that ruin my world. I can’t let my nature to take the control, not now, not in another world. Different challenges, different achievements. Fitting in a world that is perfect per se is a bigger achievement that fitting in a chaotic world as mine. Here I’ll can find satisfaction in my actions. Heh, I wish I could believe in those thoughts. Anyway, I’ve been here for a month. A month I spent trying to gain an opportunity to fit in Equestria; the world a month ago if someone told me it exists I would laugh at the face of who told me that. This is a life opportunity as a human, as a psychopath, as a brony. I won’t waste it for a stupid doubt. “Is anything wrong?” Asks Luna. “I’ll tell you my thoughts later.” I answer. She could have read my mind, distrust me and send me to whatever the place would be my destiny if I don’t get my freedom. The least I can do to return her that confidence is to tell her, but I don’t have the courage to say it right now. I fear the consequences. Plus, watching the 6 main characters of the show have helped me to control my nature in my world. What I learn from them in this one may have the same effect. I’ll tell Luna about this when I dominate my problem. Well, I call it a problem just to psych myself that it is a problem. I don’t really know if my nature is a problem or not. If my thoughts and knowledge are correct, Celestia will send me to Ponyville. It’s the most logic. The Elements of Harmony, the only magic that it’s more powerful than the princesses is there. Besides, Spike can report her about my behavior more effectively than anything else. I MUST find a way to control my thoughts, maybe there I can. I hope I can. We walk into a castle’s chamber, Lyn’s there. Celestia speaks. “Luna, have you decided your vote?” “We have decided that Reason deserves to be free. We consider that he is not a threat to Equestria.” I wish I had so much confidence, I don’t really know if she really trusts me that much. The princess of the sun speaks again. “Lyn, you have had more contact with him than any other pony in the castle. Should he be free?” “Yes, my princess.” “What is your fundament?” “I shared time with him. He wasn't the danger he says he is. In fact, he was very kind with me.” What an interesting pony, we barely talked about deep subjects and she trusts in me. Is everypony else in Equestria like that? If I wanted I could have convinced her about anything else. I don’t have anything against her, but I’m more close to Luna. Don’t blame me; I move by logic and logically a divine being is more interesting and influential than someone who doesn’t highlight from the average. I watch her cutie mark, two white circles. I don’t know what they mean, maybe I’ll ask her someday. I smile to her and she smiles at me. “As I promised, since there are two ponies disposed to free you, I will be the third.” Proclaim Celestia. “Thank you very much, princess.” “You will be sent to Ponyville to live with the bearers of the Elements of Harmony. I know you know them, so it will not be necessary to explain anything about them.” I smile at the sight that I was right, come on, predict a god is something I can be proud of. But maybe she only did me the favor of agree with me only to bother me. I think she can do that. “May I ask you something, princess?” I ask and she looks at me. “I want you for any reason you suggest, order or recommend to any pony or intelligent being to have any kind of treat to me. I want to ask it to your sister too.” I watch Luna for a moment and look at Celestia again. “I pretend to fit in this society to learn about harmony. Having any advantage from their rulers that affect their way to treat me would damage the information I could obtain and my insertion would be forced and unnatural. I want to come there as a common outsider and gain my place on my own.” “I insist that the Elements of Harmony should know you.” She really tries to watch me. “I don’t have objections. I will introduce myself to them when I get there. Just put me in front of them but I don’t want them to act in a determined way by order or advice of yours or Luna’s… My apologies, Princess Luna’s” “Very well, and since you are that interested in study harmony…” I look at her expectant. “I want you to send me your progress, and since you don’t want me to ask Spike to help you, I’ll let you to gain his help or find your way on your own.” Another way to watch me. It’s ok, I can’t blame her to try to protect her world. In a couple of hours I took my clothes, I packed them in a bag and went to say goodbye to Lyn. “Good bye, Lyn. It’s time for me to leave and try to comprehend your world. I promise I’ll come back to see you and the next time I’ll invite you to have lunch.” She smiles and speaks with her shyness. “That would be nice. I’ll miss you. Send me a letter when you can, please.” She seems to have a big link to me considering the short time we spent together. I respect that. “I will, but it won’t be so often. I get lost in my mind frequently; in the real world it’s easier to me to get lost.” We laugh. “Take care, Reason.” “You too, Lyn.” I can’t ignore how quickly I got used to my new name. I walk to the garden and talk with Luna, she’s there to teleport me to Ponyville. “Art thou ready? The bearers of the Elements are gathered in thy destiny. Our sister told them to know thee and thy name, nothing else.” “I’m ready. I’m thankful that she did me that favor.” “We will visit thee some nights. We hope thou do not mind.” “Of course not, you’re my friend.” I don’t lie, but that was an order, not a question… You know what? Do you remember when I said she trusted me? Now I know that she really doesn’t. I don’t appreciate her less for that, prudence is something valuable. I’m being teleported. Now I’m in front of the mane six. I know, call them that way in this world would be stupid. They stare at me as if I was some kind of weirdo. Well, I have to admit it. Here I’m a weirdo. It’s time to introduce myself. Author's Note If you want to read the original version (in spanish), click here And finally what all have been waiting for! The mane six!
