Pinkie and Author don't mix

by The Gunslinger

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Random, Pinkie Pie, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Original Character
Length: 848

Pinkie likes messing with the author, and correcting his mistakes, causing him to go crazy.

Pinkie messing with the author, and telling him how to his job, and just plain old annoying him half to death is what Pinkie does here. So much to the point that it doesn't end very well. For the Author, that is. And this is just a random thought out of my head!

Published 2013-08-25 00:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-08-25 00:50:02 UTC

Nothing to stop 'er

  "Author? Are you going to start the story now?"

"Damn it, Pinkie! I'm working on it. You just gotta give me an hour and I can do it. Okay?"

   "Okay Dokie Lokie! This'll be fun, right? Ooh, put it in there! Please, I beg you!"

  "...Pinkie....what the fuck. Who's over there with you? And why are you doing that in the story?"

  "Doing what?"

  "What are you doing?"

  "Oh, I'm playing key master, but I can't get the key in the hole!"

"....Ooookay? Now let's get started with the story, alright?"

   "What story?"

"The one we're trying to do right now."

"But that's meant to be done next Tuesday. Not on Friday, silly."

"My story, my rules. Lets get this started."

~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~

     It all began on a nice cool, summer afternoon, when Pinkie Pie was prancing around, looking for someone to prank. She LOVED prancing, but it wasn't the best of things to do to certain ponies, like Fluttershy. That timid pesagus couldn't handle the simplist of pranks, because it would put her into tears. Pinkie's goal now, was to prank somepony had never dared to prank before: The Author

  DAMN IT PINKIE, FOLLOW THE STORY! NOT YOUR WHIMS!

  "Hmmm, nope! You need a prank, you big ole meanie pants! And also to lighten up!"

Who runs this story right now?

  "Discord."

..wat?...I need to insert that meme here...

"What's a meme?"

NOTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW! Lets get back to the story. NOW.

"Hmpf. Meanie pants."

  Shush child. Adults are speaking.

"But you're still talking."

...ouch

"Now I'll go back to the story."

Thank you.

  Ahem. Now as I was saying...

In the modest village of pony vile, there lived a prankster named Pinkie Pie. She loved to make people sm-

"Ponies."

What?

"It's meant to be 'Pinkie loves to make ponies smile.'"

...thank you.

Where was I? Oh yes. Pinkie loved to make ponies smile and feel great about their day, because that is what she thought was her special thing. It was even her cutie mark!

"No, parties is my cutie mark"

...Can you let me tell the story?

"Not if you keep messing it up, silly!"

Hmpf. Shush. Don't worry.

Making ponies happy was one of Pinkie's many talents, along with her chief talent, parties, which served to make ponies really happy! But sometimes the pony would wish to be left alone, and other times they would be like Pinkie! So she varied her styles to fit the kind of pony, like fancy stuff for Octy, dub step for Vinyl, Booky stuff for Twilight, pranks for Dashie, and FASHION stuff for Rarity. She remembered them all so she coul-

"You're a horrible Author."

...thanks for the ego boost.

"You're welcome! Oooo, candy!"

...gah! Should I just give up with you around, saying my every mistake, AS I make them?

"Yepper deppers!"

Really. So what do we do now?

"I don't know, you're the Author!"

...I want to strangle you right now.

"Why would you want to do that?"

...I'm hungry.

"So here, have a cupcake!"

...I didn't want that.

"But you're hungry!"

Ugh...there's no winning with you around.

"You could win at apple-bobbing!"

...grrr...

Pinkie here woke up in a crazy house, and she saw-

"This makes no sense though. "

I give up now...

Author down!

  The Author took out his pistol and shot the dragon. He sighed, and took a stroll throughout the forest, wondering what he should do next. He really shouldn't cause Pinkie to show up, since she would annoy him to no end, but he had nothing to even do! It was like he could be annoyed or bored. He had to take a pick. Wait...he could just summon some whiskey! That solves EVERYTHINGZ.

  So he pulled out the bottle from nowhere and began to drink heavily from it.

"Hiya!"

"Gah! Fuck. Why are you here?"

"Because you need a friend."

" I'm fine. Don't need your damned friendship. Shut up and go away."

"I'll report you to Just some random pony."

"You wouldn't dare."

"You need him!"

What's going on here? Author, are you drinking again?

"...maybe?"

I'm going to kick your ass if you don't stop. You're ruining my story so much, it's just plain old stupid now.

"You're stupid."

Just some random pony takes out his trusty shotgun and kills Author with it

I fixed the issue. And Pinkie, you're awesome. You are best pony, but Discord is best overall. Alright?

"But I love you!"

And I love you also. But don't tell anypony that. They don't like me playing favorites.

"Cross my heart, hope to fly,and stick a cupcake in my eyes!"

Thank you for promising. Now anything else you need to say?

"Twilight hates the Dusk series"

I didn't need to know that. Now I'm going to get going. Make an adventure, alright?

"Fine, you meanie pants."

Goodbye.

"Buh bye!"

Pinkie waved at the disappearing pony, and smiled wide. Then she trotted back to Ponyville, to check on her cupcakes made of Zap Apple Jam.