The Horse Collar

"Fluttershy told me what ya did," Applejack said sadly.

So this was why she wanted to talk to him in private. They sat on the upper level of the barn on top of the large pile of hay bales where, hopefully, no Cutie Mark Crusaders would find them.

Big Macintosh remained silent.

Applejack didn't want to look at her big brother. "She was cryin', Mac."

Big Mac winced, and put the back of his hoof on his brow. He was considering doing the same, now.

He didn't want to be talking to his sister about any of this, but he knew it had to come sooner or later.

He replied solemnly, "Yeeup. Are ya mad?"

Applejack picked at an individual piece of hay in the bale beneath her, "Ah don't rightly know how ah feel right now, Big Mac."

Big Mac was silent again.

Applejack asked, "So ya know now. Y'all know what happens, then? What you made me... feel..."

Big Mac furrowed his brow, and hesitated in his response, before rebuffing his little sister, "That wasn't mah doin' sis. That was y'all. It was yer touchin' what set it off." Big Mac wasn't angry. He spoke softly, and just wished this conversation would end and the topic would never come up again.

Applejack didn't want to reply to that. Her gaze remained steadfast on the hay bale under her haunches. She's already pulled an impressive little pile of hay out of the bale, and lined it up in a row. "Was it mah fault what happened tah Fluttershy? Ifn' ye knew what she woulda felt. Ifn' I explained it to ya sooner..." She didn't finish her thought.

Big Mac wished she wasn't explaining it to him now. "Ain't no way none of this is your fault, Applejack. An even if it were, d'ain't no sense fussin' bout what's dun." He wished he could take his own advice.

Silence fell upon the bales once again.

Applejack didn't usually go for any fancy city perfumes, but today she smelled like fresh chamomile; Big Mac's favorite.

Big Mac choose to break the silence, "Y'all needs ta know ahm awful sorry about what I dun tah Fluttershy. I want to tell her mahself, but, I can't go see her again. Not after what I dun."

Applejack squirmed her haunches on her hay bale. Her hind hooves reached down to the old planks of the barn's upper floor, and she was gently rubbing her hoof in circles against the wood finish. "Didja like it?"

Big Mac didn't sound distressed by Applejack's question. Nothing about this conversation could possibly get less comfortable than it already was. He answered her in the same soft monotone he had been using for the rest of their heart to heart. "Ah'd be lyin' if ah didn't say ah wanted her tah feel good. Ah wasn't thinkin' that she'd be right rational. Ah thought she'd lose control an we'd end up..." He didn't finish his thought. Applejack didn't need him to.

After a moment, he continued, "But she knew what I was doin' an she started cryin' not ten seconds later."

Applejack was breaking a single piece of hay now into tiny squares with her forehooves. She didn't want to look up at Big Mac, and he shared the sentiment. "That's not what ah meant. Ah meant didja like it... when... ah came."

Big Mac shook his head. "Yer my sister."

Applejack picked at the hay even more. She had done quite a bit of damage to this bale by now. Her voice carried softness and shame, as though she was responding to being terribly scolded by Granny Smith. "Yeah..."

Big Mac looked up from the floor; not at Applejack, at first, but past the edge of the second level down to the barn's dirt floor below.

He peeked toward Applejack's face awkwardly. She looked shameful something fierce. At some point during the conversation, she had taken her hair band out, letting her mane dangle elegantly. The way she looked now reminded him of Fluttershy.

She didn't look back at him, but her hind hoof slid across the floorboards toward his. She stopped short of touching him. "But, ye can't help what yah feel, an, maybe yah thought it felt good. Maybe yah thought about it afterward." she added.

She swallowed hard.

Big Mac said, "Ah think it's the horse collar. Ah tried takin' it off and it wasn't gonna budge. In mah books that says it's mighty suspicious fer what caused all this."

Applejack's hoof slid back toward herself, away from Big Mac. "Ah was thinkin' the same thing, on account of it startin' at the same time. Zecora did say she didn't know where it came from. She said she inherited it from her grandmother back in her native land. Ah think we need tah give her a talkin' to; get this all sorted out."

Big Mac couldn't agree more. "Yeeup."

Applejack reached up to slip her hair band back into place. "There's somethin' else you should know. Twilight knows too, an... I won't sugar coat it, sugar cube. She's angry. Yesterday she was making some mighty unsavory threats. Threats of which ah would-- have-- none, let me jus tell you that." She tapped the hay bale next to her to punctuate her certainty and conviction as she spoke. "An this mornin' when ah saw her ah didn't know who looked more heartbroken, her or Fluttershy."

Applejack reached out and was about to gently pat Big Mac on the back before her hoof tensed up, and slowly withdrew. "Bes you stay away from her an let this blow over."

Big Mac didn't want to be reminded of Twilight right now. He was doing his best not to imagine, wherever he went, that she would appear next to him in a flash and use him as a plaything again. He didn't like hearing the word 'heartbroken' either. "She was upset?"

Applejack nodded, though neither of them were looking at one another at the time. "Ah think she didn't want to talk tah me because I told her she'd be regrettin' all the things she was saying bout you come the mornin'. Ah told her tah take it easy an sleep it off an forget all this business about goin' after my big brother all lookin' fer trouble. Why, this mornin' she probably realized ah was right, as usual, and was feelin' mighty guilty about it taboot."

Applejack looked up at her big brother, and stared at the glistening carved texture of his polished ebony horse collar. "All the same, you bes' be keepin' yer distance, ya hear me?"

Big Mac couldn't agree more. "Yeeup."