Offscreen

by Grunt Minor

Rating: mature
Tags: Comedy, Romance
Length: 1433

A trip to the Crystal Empire leads to Rainbow Dash having a provocative daydream about her friends.

A trip to the Crystal Empire leads to Rainbow Dash having a provocative daydream about her friends.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-08-28 20:30:01 UTC

Slow Motion

The vibrant, multi-colored train screeched to a halt at the train station, alerting the ponies in the station of the newest arrival. As the train stopped, the passengers began to disembark, chattering away with their companions as they did so.

"Yay! The Crystal Empire again! This is going to be so much fun!" Pinkie Pie declared with glee as she hopped happily ahead of the rest of her friends.

"It's too bad Spike is sick, he would have loved this. I feel sorry for the poor little dragon. Having to stay in bed to miss all of this," Fluttershy sympathized.

"I can't wait to see how surprised Cadance will be! And she thought I would miss out on her birthday," Twilight said with a smile.

All six friends trotting through past the station and into the crystal city, conversing and laughing with each other. They strolled through the city, eyeing the sights as they went. It appeared that ever since Princess Cadance and Shining Armor had been given the responsibility of running the still-recovering empire, the city had become more beautiful and vibrant with each time they visited. Crystal ponies littered the streets, the roads packed with carriages and pedestrians, while the sidewalks were covered in vendors and stands.

"Golly, I really hope that the Princess loves my gift," Applejack remarked, holding up a box covered in green gift wrap to eye level.

The apple farmer gazed at it and rubbed a hoof on her chin, as if inspecting it.

"Of course she will love it, silly! She is the Princess of Love!" Pinkie pointed out, poking Applejack in the chest.

After twenty minutes of walking through the city and dodging native ponies and carriages, they had finally made their way to the Crystal Castle. Entering the grand castle after passing the guards, the six mares made their way to the throne room, which was several stories above.

They galloped into the throne room, a scene of grandeur appearing before them. This throne room was not as massive or alluring as Canterlot Castle, but it still had the charm that a towering palace should have. Everything had been cleaned and prepared for Cadance's birthday celebration.

In the middle of the room, a pink alicorn was tending to an aide holding out a clipboard. Cadance pointed a hoof at an item on the list before sending the aide away.

"Cadance!" Twilight called out, rushing toward her sister-in-law.

Said princess jolted in surprise, turning around with a look of shock on her face.

"Twilight? You're here!?" she gasped.

The rest of Twilight's friends stayed behind with gifts in tow, watching the display.

"This is excellent!" Cadance cried as she galloped to meet Twilight halfway.

The two nearly crashed into each other, locking into a tight embrace as they met.

"Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake. Clap your hooves and do a little shake!"

Both of the sisters chanted together as they carried out the motions that went with it.

While this was happening, the five mares behind Twilight were looking onto the heartwarming scene. They all smiled happily and the warmth of the bond between the two ponies in front of them could be felt by all of them.

"Oh, such sweet little gesture that is. This is going be to a great day for us all, I feel," Rarity sighed in elation as she held a hoof over her chest.

They all nodded in agreement as the five mares looked on.

Rainbow Dash had just finished nodding in agreement when she turned back to see Twilight's flank shaking in the air, the ending of her and Cadance's ritual.

At first, she thought nothing of it, but then...

Rainbow's eyes followed the purple flank as it slowly shook back and forth.

Back and forth.

Back and forth.

That soft, smooth purple flank. Was time slowing down? She didn't know, but it certainly felt like it to the pegasus.

Rainbow Dash stared intently.

She couldn't take her eyes off of Twilight's flank. Her ears twitched slightly, as she lost herself in a sea of purple.

"Wow...Twilight would probably be into some pretty kinky stuff. That awkward nerd thing she pulls off is hot!"

She imagined a scene with Twilight and her in the library. Twilight was presenting her flank to Rainbow Dash, moaning seductively and begging her to swat her flank with the book that the pegasus was now holding.

Swat. Swat. Swat.

"Yeah...kinky," Rainbow Dash mused, beginning to sweat a little bit.

Rainbow's vision was then obscured by the rest of her friends advancing towards Twilight. Directly in front of her line of sight, was Pinkie Pie, bouncing up and down.

Up and down.

Up and down.

Rainbow's magenta eyes kept in rhythm with her bubblegum pink flank. So jovial, so...energetic.

"Pinkie Pie is the youngest of us and word on the street is that she's also a virgin. She's so hyper and full of energy. I bet she would be a freak in the sack. And I would get to deflower her...sweet!"

She imagined her and the crazy pink mare in Pinkie's bed. Pinkie Pie was riding her cowpony style like there was no tomorrow. Rainbow gazed up at her, Pinkie wearing her usual large, clueless grin on her face.

Bounce. Bounce. Bounce.

"Faster Pinkie! Faster!" Dash cried out in her head.

Rainbow Dash's wings twitched and her sweating grew stronger as she checked out each of her friends.

"Applejack...so strong. Her muscles give her that sleek and refined look. I think she would like it rough. And Rairty...so beautiful and feminine. Despite that, she would probably still be into some kinky stuff. This wouldn't be her first rodeo."

She continued inspecting her friends' bodies, moving her gaze slowly as she scanned from top to bottom each body.

"Fluttershy. Another virgin. All the others I would rut and completely go to town but a delicate flower like Shy...I would have to make soft, sweet love. Champagne in the bathtub...a bubble bath...oh yeah!"

"Dashie, I'm Captain Sparrow and I want you to scissor me timbers!" imaginary Fluttershy said, smiling meekly and blushing.

Rainbow played fantasy after fantasy in her mind so intensely that her imaginations almost seemed real.

"All of us are pretty close. We are always there for each, we go through hardships and fun times together. We learn a lot from each other. A kickflank friendship is what we've got and our bond is nigh unbreakable...it's only the most awesomest perk in the world that all of my best friends *just happen to be freakin' sexy! I'm so lucky! The happiest mare in the world!"*

****

Everypony in the room looked at Rainbow Dash with mystified expressions.

The rainbow pegasus was staring at all of them with wide eyes, mouth agape with drool sliding out. Her wings were completely flared open, frozen in place. She was groaning like a zombie and twitching spastically, sweat dripping down her face.

"Is...she okay?" Cadance asked with concern.

"I have no idea!" Pinkie chirped happily as she trotted up to the frozen Rainbow Dash.

"What's wrong with her?" Twilight added.

"Oh no! She must be having a seizure! Stand back, everypony! I've heard about these," Pinkie warned as she moved directly in front of Rainbow Dash.

A drop of drool fell from Rainbow's mouth.

"I'll save you, Dashie! Don't die on us! Please don't walk into the light! It's not your time! We all still love you! Don't do it! Suicide is not the answer!" Pinkie lamented passionately, nearly in tears.

The rest of the room watched in utter confusion as Pinkie Pie aligned her face with Rainbow's.

"Ready? Clear!"

Pinkie Pie rammed her snout into the frozen pony's own.

Boop.

It had no effect.

"This must be really bad! Clear!" Pinkie cried out urgently.

Boop.

"Clear!"

Boop.

"Clear!"

Boop.

"Cl-"

"Pinkie! I don't think stabbing her with your snout is working," Rarity interrupted.

Pinkie halted her action of bopping her snout against Rainbow's snout and turned back to her interrupter.

"Are you questioning my master's degree in medical science?" Pinkie retorted, leering at Rarity.

"Pinkie, you don't have one of those," Twilight sighed.

Pinkie glared at both them.

"How did she know?! Is she a Gypsy?" Pinkie thought frantically.

"Fine!" she yelled as she backed away from the still-uncured Rainbow Dash.

An awkward silence overtook the room.

One minute passed.

Two.

Three.

Nopony said a word. They stared at the paralyzed Rainbow Dash, only averted their gaze to watch a feather fall off of one of Dash's outstretched wings.

Fluttershy broke the silence.

"So...now what?"