Magnificent Failure

The morning after Sweetie Belle's aborted performance, Rarity got up early, and headed for the Palace. She couldn't bear to be in the hotel. Every time she saw her sister's face, she was overcome with a deep sense of failure and regret.

With the help of a guard, she found Twilight's room, and knocked on the door. It opened for her glowing faint purple, and she entered to find the alicorn sitting upright in bed, her mane frazzled and unkempt.

“Well, how do you do, my lovely Princess?” asked the unicorn.

“Don't even ask,” said Twilight, but she continued to speak, anyway. “I come back here, and find all my friends lives are in shambles. I feel like it's my fault, somehow; like I could have done something about it all, if I had been there.”

“Maybe,” said Rarity, “and maybe not. I'm sure we all could have done a bang-up job fucking ourselves over, with or without you around.”

“Wait,” said Twilight. “Aren't you supposed to be on a train to Sweetie's next show, by now?”

“Tour's canceled,” said Rarity.

“What happened?” asked Twilight.

“The short version is that I let somepony down who was relying on me,” said Rarity.

“Haven't we all?” sighed Twilight.

“I suppose so,” said Rarity.

Twilight lit a cigarette, and the two sat in silence.

“We are disasters,” Twilight half-laughed, after a minute. “All of us.”

“I know,” said the unicorn, also laughing, quietly and bitterly. “But I always knew that, and so did you.”

“We were all so unworthy,” said Twilight; “just totally unworthy.”

“We were just there,” said Rarity. “The Elements just latched onto us as a matter of convenience.”

“I meant unworthy of each other,” said Twilight, shaking her head. “Fuck the Elements.”

“Oh, ye gods,” said Rarity, incredulous. “I never thought I'd hear you say that.”

“Well, you just heard it.” said Twilight, flicking her white lighter repeatedly, watching the flame burst again and again into existence from where the little Bic floated in front of her face.

“And now, I'm gonna ask you all for something huge, and I don't know what any of you will say.”

“What's that?” asked Rarity.

“To stand beside me while I set off a bomb,” said Twilight.

“Sounds like a blast,” said Rarity.

Twilight cringed at Rarity's pun, but said nothing.

“So, what sort of a bomb are we talking about?” asked the white unicorn, doing her best to sound cheerful.

Twilight looked directly at her.

“Shimmershine.”

Rarity's eyes widened.

“That's one hell of a bomb.”

“Wait 'til you hear the rest,” said Twilight.

“Darling, I simply cannot wait,” said Rarity.

“I'll tell you all later, after breakfast,” said Twilight.

“Shimmershine,” said Rarity. “Cenasolus. Wow. Of all things.”

“I know,” said Twilight. “Seems like everything that dies really does come back, even if you wished it would stay dead.”

She dropped the butt of her cigarette in an ashtray, and immediately lit another one.

“What kills me, though, Rares, is this: Here I sit, thinking back to that thing; how many worlds it had destroyed and how old it must be and how huge the universe has to be for a thing like that to even exist, and I can't help but wonder: Is it possible that somewhere out in all of that, there's a version of us where we're all actually happy? Where the “magic of friendship” really does just solve every problem, every time? Where we're not complete fuck-ups, and everything didn't go to shit?”

Rarity stared out the window, and after a few moments, she shrugged.

“Who cares?” she asked.

She telekinetically snatched Twilight's cigarette right from her lips, and brought it to her own. Then, she took a deep drag, and gave Twilight a smug little smirk.

“We're not them, are we?”

***

Lyra stepped off the train from Canterlot, Shimmershine close behind her.

“This place is beautiful,” she said.

Shimmershine said nothing. He'd been told he was going to the Crystal City to see somepony who could help him get rid of his nightmares, but he had no idea who that pony might be.

“Ms. Heartstrings?” said a deep, bass voice.

Lyra turned, expecting to see a guard, and was stunned to see Prince Shining Armor, standing with a small armed escort, and smiling at her.

“What a couple of days,” she mumbled, bowing quickly.

Shimmershine quickly did likewise.

“Uh, thanks,” said the Prince, as they stood up. Shining Armor's armed guards chuckled as the mare and the colt resumed their normal posture.

“I'm sorry,” he said. “I kinda have a standing order that nopony do that for me around here. Feels weird; I just married into this, after all.”

“Ah,” was all that Lyra could say to respond.

“There's a carriage waiting to take us to the castle to see Twilight,” said Shining Armor.

“Twilight's here!?” came Lyra's stunned reply.

Shining Armor scratched the back of his neck.

“Guess word gets back to Ponyville kinda slow,” he said. “Yeah, she's here.”

Suddenly, Lyra felt deeply relieved. At least her son would be in the hooves of somepony she actually knew, albeit from years ago.

“Come on,” said the Prince, gesturing for them to follow.

“How is she?” asked Lyra.

“She's Twilight,” said Shining Armor. “If you knew her at all, she's basically what you remember, I guess. Just keep in mind, she probably doesn't want to answer a lot of questions.”

“Of course,” said Lyra.

Shimmershine tugged at Lyra's tail with his teeth.

“Mom, who's Twilight?”

Lyra turned, and looked down at Shimmershine.

“She's a Princess,” she said.

“Like Princess Luna?” asked Shimmershine. He had apparently been quite taken with the Moon Goddess, and Lyra giggled at his inquisition.

“Something like that,” she said. “You'll like her.”

***

“So, you're pretty much about to go head-to-head with a bunch of dead gods?”

Rainbow Dash was sipping at a glass of water. It was the only thing that seemed to relieve her near-constant nausea. The ponies were all sitting in the dining hall of the Crystal Palace, and as promised, Twilight had been explaining to them what she was about to do.

“Hopefully not,” said Twilight, giving her a stern look. “The idea is to help Shimmershine remember what he used to be so that maybe he can contain them.”

“So, you're turning him back into that thing he was before?” asked Applejack, chewing on a toothpick.

“Sort of,” said Twilight, “but he'll still remember being a pony, too.”

“What will that do to the poor kid?” asked Pinkie Pie.

“Pinkie,” said Twilight, “I have no idea, but I have no choice.”

“She's right,” said Rarity. “As bad as Cenasolus was, this sounds even worse. We can't risk letting these things into our world.”

Fluttershy nodded somberly.

“That's why I just wanted to ask you all...”

“Answer's 'yes,'” said Applejack.

“You didn't let me...” Twilight began, but was quickly cut off.

"I'll stay close,” said Rainbow Dash.

“Well, that's nice of you, Rainbow,” said Twilight, “but I hardly think you should speak for...”

“I'm in,” said Rarity. “I made up my mind about that earlier.”

“Me too,” said Fluttershy.

“Me five,” said Pinkie, and she shrugged. “I was counting.”

“What is wrong with all of you?” asked Twilight.

“Pathological attraction to mortal peril, here.” said Rainbow Dash. “Can't say a damned thing for the rest of them.”

“Fantastic,” said Twilight. “Show tune, anyone? No?”

“Not in the mood,” said Applejack, sipping from her flask.

“Applejack,” said Rarity, from across the table, “are you having whiskey for breakfast?”

“After breakfast,” said Applejack. “There's a difference.” The orange pony put her flask back into a pocket of her flannel jacket.

“It's just like old times,” said Twilight, withdrawing a cigarette from where she kept the pack in a white sweatband strapped high on her left foreleg like a greaser would use the rolled-up sleeve of his T-shirt. She withdrew her lighter from next to it, and struck up a flame. “We're still a bunch of fucking morons."

***

“This way,” said Cadance, leading the six ponies. “Shining brought them in earlier.”

She sensed Twilight's heart beginning to sink as she realized where she and her friends were being led, and she lagged her pace a bit to walk beside her.

“I'm sorry,” she said. “It's the only empty room in the Palace. It would have looked suspicious to empty out any of the others, and nopony needs to know what's going on here if they aren't already involved.”

“Pretty soon,” said Twilight, “everypony might be involved.”

“But for now, they're not, and I'd like to keep it that way. We can throw a blanket over it, if you'd like,” said Cadance.

“No,” said Twilight. “What's done is done. Besides, it might just be the incentive I need to get something right, for a change.”

“Twilight,” said Fluttershy, softly. “Don't do that to yourself.”

As the door to the chamber opened, all the ponies stopped, each one grappling in her own way with the deluge of memories that overwhelmed them in the face of the ancient, magical mirror. Lyra, Shining Armor, and of course, Shimmershine all stood in front of it, but not a single eye was turned to them.

“Twilight Sparkle,” said Lyra, “it really is you.”

“Yeah,” said Twilight staring past the unicorn and into the mirror. “It's me, alright.”

“Can you help him?” Lyra asked.

“We'll see,” said Twilight, and she looked down at the little foal. He stared up at her, wide eyed.

“Am I supposed to bow?” he asked.

Twilight giggled quietly.

“Not to me,” she said. “I'm just a pony, like you.”

“But you're an alicorn,” said the colt, “and Mom said you were a Princess.”

“Did she, now?” asked Twilight raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah,” said Shimmershine. “She was telling me stories about you, before.”

“Shush, Shim,” said Lyra.

Twilight smiled a little.

“It's okay,” she said, looking up.

“Did Celestia explain the risks involved in this to you?” she asked, looking at the green unicorn.

“Yes,” said Lyra, “but I don't think you'd do this if you thought it would hurt him, Twilight.”

“It won't hurt him,” said Twilight, “but it could hurt you.” She took a step towards her.

“He'll change. It's unavoidable. Is that okay with you?”

She looked down at the foal.

“And is it okay with you?” she asked.

“I just want them to go away,” said the foal, desperately, and his eyes teared up a little.

Twilight gave the colt a look of pure pity. The letter had explained a little about the nature of his nightmares, but seeing him now, she realized that as far as he knew, he was just another colt. That made it all the more cruel that he should have had to endure these things.

It also made it all the more cruel for her to do what she had been asked to do.

She knelt, and looked into his eyes.

“Shim, would you care if you found out you used to be somepony else? Somepony completely different than who you've been your whole life? Maybe even somepony who did some things that you never would have done?”

Shimmershine seemed terribly confused, his eyes showing the blank stare of a child unable to process something beyond his comprehension.

“Does that even matter?” asked Lyra.

Twilight looked at the foal, then at his mother.

“Of course it matters,” she said.

“Twilight,” said Lyra. “Just do what you think is right.”

Twilight felt a weight descend on her heart. There really was no choice.

“Alright,” she said.

She leaned forward, and touched the tip of her horn gently to Shimmershine's forehead. He looked into her eyes, and began to breathe heavily.

“Don't worry,” she said, and he seemed to calm, slightly.

Shutting her eyes, she thought back to the incident that had set these events in motion, and of how Shimmershine had come to be as he was. As those moments flooded back through her mind, she felt them flowing into the memory of the colt.

When she opened her eyes again, Shimmershine's expression had changed. He appeared horrified, but also distant, his eyes glazed and unmoving. His pupils began to dilate.

“Shim?” asked Lyra, touching him on the shoulder. “Are you okay?”

Shimmershine said nothing, but sank slowly to the floor.

“Twilight,” Lyra's eyes filled with panic. “What's going on?

“I don't know,” said Twilight. “This wasn't supposed to happen.”

“What do you mean, 'wasn't supposed to happen?'” asked Lyra, frantically.

“I've used this spell a half a dozen times, at least,” said Twilight, her voice growing defensive. “It's never done this, before.”

“Cadance,” said Shining Armor. “Send Celestia a letter. This could be serious.”

“Serious, how?” asked Lyra, panic growing in her voice.

“We can't tell,” said Shining Armor. “That's the problem.”

“Will he be okay?” asked Lyra.

“There's no way to know,” said Twilight. She tried to keep her words calm, but she could see the colt's mother could hear the uncertainty in her voice.

“Celestia will know what to do,” said Cadance, trying to calm the panicked mare.

Twilight knew better. This had been Celestia's idea. If she had anticipated such a thing, she would have offered some warning.

“We'll take him to the infirmary,” said Shining Armor. “I'll have the doctor look at him.”

He levitated the limp colt onto his own back, and walked towards the door. Lyra followed him.

“I'll go get word to Celestia,” said Cadance, following her husband toward the door.

“What about us?” asked Twilight.

“Stay here,” said Cadance, stopping to look back at the six mares. “All of you,” she said, looking at Twilight's friends each in turn. “We might need your help.”

“What can we do?” asked Fluttershy. “The elements of Harmony don't even work anymore, and if they did, they're not even here.”

“Uh, I've got mine,” said Rainbow Dash. She opened up her jacket, and sure enough, it was there.

“Me too,” said Pinkie Pie.

Applejack sighed.

“Yeah, mine's here, too. Not my idea, but it's here.”

“Well, I never get rid of jewelry,” said Rarity. “Never know when something's going to be just the thing to really make an outfit; It's in my hotel room.”

“Well, I...” Fluttershy stopped mid-sentence. “That's right,” she said. “I did bring mine... how strange.”

“You all kept those things?” asked Twilight. “They're useless.”

“Well, if it makes you feel better,” said Applejack. “I threw the damned thing away. “Found it's way back to me, though.”

“Well,” said Twilight, “I don't see much chance of that for mine.”

“Look,” said Cadance, stepping back towards her sister, and placing a hoof on her shoulder. “I don't care if the Elements work, or not. You're still Twilight Sparkle, and we might need you.”

“As for the rest of you,” she said, turning to face the others, “just be yourselves.”

She stepped out of the room, and left the ponies standing in a circle.

Twilight looked at the mirror, and her body slackened, slightly.

“Come on,” she said. “I don't want to stay here.”

***

Rainbow Dash stumbled out of her bathroom for the third time that day. She had been woefully ill since shortly after the incident with the foal, but she would not allow herself to stay hidden away.

“Twilight might crack if she doesn't have us all close by,” she mumbled to herself. “She never was all that great under pressure.”

As she stepped into the hall, she was surprised to bump into Scootaloo.

“Hey!” said the orange pegasus. Then, her brow furrowed. “You don't look so good.”

“I know,” said Rainbow Dash. “Been sick.”

“You?” asked Scootaloo. “Never.”

“Ah, it's nothing,” said Rainbow Dash. “What are you doing here?”

“Applebloom and Sweetie Belle said we should all have family time.”

She rolled her eyes.

“Ah,” said Rainbow Dash, “and you came looking for me?”

“Well, yeah,” said Scootaloo. “You're my honorary big sis, right? How's life?”

“Awesome as always,” said Rainbow Dash, and a wave of vertigo and nausea hit her. She turned, and ran back for her restroom.

“What the hell!?” shouted Scootaloo, following her. As she came into the bathroom, she found her old idol bent over the toilet.

“Uh, Rainbow Dash,” she said. “This doesn't look like 'nothing.'”

Scootaloo was the last pony in the world that Rainbow Dash wanted seeing her like this.

“Least my stomach's empty,” she mumbled to herself. As if in response, she felt her guts twist into a knot. There was nothing left to come out, and she he gave several dry heaves before settling back against the wall opposite the toilet.

There was no use in trying to hide it.

“It's over for me, Scoot. They're gonna ground me.” Her head began to ache, and she rubbed at it with her hooves. “I've got...”

“Head problems,” said Scootaloo. “Fluttershy mentioned it when I asked her where your room was.”

“You knew?” asked Rainbow Dash, looking up at the wavering, unsteady image of the younger pegasus.

“Yeah,” said Scootaloo, quietly.

“The doctor thought a little time off might help me,” said Rainbow Dash. “I don't think it's working.”

“Don't give up, yet,” said Scootaloo. “Maybe it'll get better.”

“Maybe,” said Rainbow Dash, “but how long can I really hold a thing like this off?”

“I don't know,” said Scootaloo, “but you gotta try.”

Rainbow Dash shook her head.

“I think maybe I should just resign before I get somepony killed,” she said. “Like me, for instance.”

“Is that really it,” asked Scootaloo, “or do you just wanna go out on your own terms?”

“Both, I guess,” said Rainbow Dash.

“So, you're gonna quit?”

“I guess so, Scootaloo,” said Rainbow Dash.

“I never thought I'd see the day that Rainbow M.F. Dash counted herself out,” said the orange mare, sadly.

“When you're done, you're done,” said Rainbow Dash. “That's just life.”

“But you're not done,” said Scootaloo. “I don't believe it.”

Rainbow Dash sighed. She was beginning to feel better, and she managed to stand.

“I don't wanna believe it, either,” she said, “but I think it's time.”

She stepped past Scootaloo, and headed for the hallway.

“Hey,” said Scootaloo.

Rainbow Dash stopped, and turned to face her.

“Yeah?”

“You remember all those times I told you that I wanted to be like you?”

Rainbow Dash recoiled slightly.

“Of course I do,” she said.

“Just making sure,” said Scootaloo.

***

“So?” asked Luna, looking at the brief letter that had come out of Celestia' hearth not an hour earlier.

“We have to go,” said Celestia. “Sorry, but you're going to miss some sleep.”

“I doubt I would have slept well, anyway,” said Luna. She pulled a gold chain hanging by Celestia's bed. A unicorn mare wearing a maid's outfit stepped into the room.

“Coffee,” said Luna. “Lots of it.”

The mare turned, and left without a word.

“Black as my heart!” shouted Luna after her.

Celestia laughed.

“Still playing that angle?” she asked, stepping to her mini bar, and pouring herself a glass of cognac.

“It keeps the little things off my desk,” said Luna. “With you, every time there's a leaky faucet, somepony comes whining. After all, you're just Celestia; you'd never be upset with anypony.”

“Of course not,” said Celestia, “but to my recollection, I haven't been bothered with the plumbing, quite yet.”

“Hyperbole,” said Luna, rolling her eyes. “Now, what of Shimmershine?”

“Luna, I haven't decided.” Celestia's shoulders slumped. “I know what I should do, but...” She gritted her teeth, and her cheek twitched slightly.

“The gray areas never were comfortable for you, were they?” asked Luna.

Celestia shook her head silently.

“If it comes to it,” said Luna, “you can leave it to me. What's a little more blood on these filthy hooves?”

“It's too much, is what it is,” said Celestia. “I'm not going to let you bear my burden.”

“Don't play martyr with me,” growled Luna, scowling, but then her expression softened. “Your burden is also mine. Never forget that.”

“Well, I'm tired of it,” said Celestia. “Choose always the needs of the many over needs of the few,” she sneered; “an old aphorism that governs those who govern, if they mean to govern well.'

“To be righteous and worthy,” she continued, not looking at her sister. “Isn't that what we were taught? To follow the rules? To learn all those old aphorisms, and to take into ourselves every piece of wisdom we could, so that when the hard decisions came, we would always know that we had done the right thing, even if it did not always feel that way?”

Luna nodded silently.

“That was the way we were taught,” said the younger sister. “That the sun and the moon should always rise on the righteous and the wicked, alike.”

"Even if some of the righteous -- the innocent -- must perish," said Celestia, and her voice cracked as next she said, "I hate that rule."

"So did they," said Luna. "Why do you think they made the Elements? They were a way to save everypony; to redeem the irredeemable, even when it seemed impossible."

"I suppose that dream is a failure, as well," said Celestia.

"Not yet," said Luna.

***

Sweetie Belle stood at the door of Rarity's hotel room. She could hear music from inside; loud music. That always meant the same thing.

“Why do I even bother?” she asked herself, but something in her tugged her hoof upward.

She knocked.

The music softened, somewhat, and the door opened. Rarity stood there, red-eyed.

“Yes?” was all she said. The word was strange and distant.

“We're going home,” said Sweetie Belle. “All the staff and everything. The label wants us to restart the tour in the Spring. If we don't, they drop me.”

Rarity said nothing.

“Do you even care?” asked Sweetie Belle, her face hardening.

“I...” Rarity shook her head, trying to clear it. “I care, Sweetie, but there's a lot more going on here, right now. I'm just really stressed out.”

“Oh?” asked Sweetie Belle, accusingly. “You don't look like it, for some reason.”

“Sweetie Belle,” said Rarity, leaning into the doorframe. “Please.”

“Please, what?” asked the younger mare.

Rarity shook her head, slightly.

“Nothing,” she said.

Sweetie Belle sighed, and walked away towards her own room.

Rarity shut the door behind her, and locked it.

She walked back towards her dresser. Upon it there sat a small candle, a box of matches, and a spoon. She needed something a little stronger than usual. The incident with Shimmershine had left her anxious, and her usual go-to remedy for her day-to-day anxiety, a Demerol and half a Valium, was not helping her relax.

More and more often these days, it seemed to not be enough.

“Gods,” she said, “Here you are with all your friends within easy reach for the first time in years, and what are you doing?”

She walked to her bed, and lay down.

“Gods, I feel like hell,” she said, and after a few moments, she shrugged, and sat up.

She felt like hell most days.

The unicorn dragged herself unwillfully from her bed. She left the room without returning to her dresser, and walked to Sweetie Belle's door. She knocked, and in a few moments her sister answered.

“May I come in?” asked Rarity.

Sweetie Belle stepped to the side. She stumbled slightly, clearly drunk, but Rarity paid it no mind.

The place was a mess. Dirty clothes lay everywhere, and an empty gin bottle sat on the nightstand. Rarity was not surprised. Sweetie's hotel rooms always looked this way.

“Listen,” she said, turning around as Sweetie Belle shut the door. “There's something really, really important going on, right now. I may not be able to come home, right away. When I get back, though, I'm going to find a way to make this up to you, alright?”

Sweetie Belle said nothing for a few moments. Then, she licked her lips and spoke.

“Okay,” she said. “Please take care of yourself.”

“I will,” said Rarity, and she left the room without a further word.

As she walked back to her room, Rarity felt her heart sinking. She would never "make this up" to her sister. She would try, of course, but in the end, something like this would happen again. The exact circumstances would be different, but the result would be the same, despite the particulars: She and Sweetie Belle would be just a little farther apart, and a little closer to the day they finally parted ways for good.

As she entered her room, she stared down at the candle on her dresser.

“What am I even worrying about?” she asked. “We'll all be dead, soon.”

She struck a match, and held it to the candle's wick, breathing in the smell of sulfur.

“What's one more little waltz with the white horse if it keeps me on my hooves until then?”

***

Pinkie Pie gave Twilight Sparkle a curious little smile. The pair were standing on the balcony overlooking the Crystal City, and the sun was moving slowly through the western sky. The day since Twilight had cast her memory spell on Shimmershine had been long, somber, and empty of words.

“What do you think Princess Celestia will want to do?” asked Pinkie Pie.

“Fuck me if I know,” said the alicorn, pulling her wine glass away from her lips, and setting it on a table.

Pinkie Pie smiled again, and her smile turned into a laugh.

“What are you laughing at?” asked Twilight, her speech slightly slurred.

“Everything,” said Pinkie Pie. “You come back, and then all this just happens. It's like it was meant to be.”

“If there's anything my life has taught me,” said Twilight, “it's that nothing's meant to be.” She lit a cigarette, and took a drag, French inhaling. “Nothing.”

“So, you're saying we just got lucky?” asked Pinkie Pie.

“Lucky?” asked Twilight. “Ghosts. Of. Gods.” She shook her head.

“Pinkie, we're fucked. This is probably the end of the world.”

“But you came back,” said Pinkie Pie. “We thought you were dead, and you came back. I think that means something.”

“Is that what your Pinkie Sense is telling you?” asked Twilight, skeptically.

“Nopers,” said Pinkie Pie. “Not a twitch or an itch, all day. I just have faith in you, that's all.”

“No place for faith in this world, Pinkie Pie. No matter what you believe in or rely on, eventually it's gonna let you down.”

“That's silly,” said Pinkie Pie.

“It's the truth,” said Twilight.

Pinkie Pie felt her heart beginning to sink. She thought of Shimmershine lying unconscious in the Palace infirmary, and her thoughts strayed to her own foals back in Ponyville.

“I named my daughter after you,” she said suddenly, uncertain herself of why she had said it.

“Huh?” Twilight gave Pinkie a stunned look.

“Yeah,” said Pinkie, “and I named my oldest son after Spike.” She gnawed at her lower lip.

“I did that because I thought both of you were gone forever, and I never wanted to forget either one of you. Then, you came back.” She shrugged. “That was impossible as far as I was concerned, but it happened.”

“Your point being?” asked the alicorn.

“Well, sometimes, you get second chances.” She shrugged. “Sometimes the impossible happens.”

Twilight sipped at her wine, but said nothing.

After several seconds, there was a flash from the sun, and both ponies looked up.

Celestia and Luna were descending in a slow, lazy spiral.

“You want me to go?” asked Pinkie Pie.

“Yeah,” said Twilight. “That would be best.”

As Pinkie Pie walked away, the alicorn lit another cigarette. She used to avoid letting Celestia see her smoke, but she didn't care, anymore.

As the two sisters landed on the balcony, Twilight turned her eyes outward, over the city. She did not want to look at either of them.

They stood there, all three of them, not a word spoken. To her own surprise, it was Twilight who finally cut apart the silence.

“I'm sorry,” she said, her voice quivering. “I never said that to you, but I was always sorry.”

“I always knew,” said Celestia.

“Oh, I do not want to be here for this,” said Luna. “I am going to find a bed.” She trotted towards the door.

“Twilight,” she said in passing, “good to see you.” She stopped, and turned to face her. “Princess,” she said, grinning mischievously, and then she walked through the door.

“Well, she hasn't changed,” said Twilight.

“She never does,” said Celestia. “If she did, I would go mad.”

“So, what do we do?” asked Twilight.

“I will have to see him to decide,” said Celestia.

“He's in the infirmary,” said Twilight. “My doing.”

“No,” said Celestia. “Mine; you were just a tool.”

“Hmph,” was Twilight's only response.

“I used you too much that way.” said Celestia. “I always had such high hopes for you that I sometimes forgot that you were still just a little filly – excuse me – a little mare, who needed a chance to just... live.”

She walked over, and sat beside Twilight, who still had not stood.

“You know,” said Celestia. “Taken as a whole, pony kind depresses me. The only thing that makes it worth my time anymore is that very occasionally, it produces magnificent individuals.”

She reached out a wing, and touched Twilight on the shoulder.

“I knew you were just such an individual the moment I met you. I suppose I just forgot that sometimes even the magnificent can fail.”

“So I'm a magnificent failure?” asked Twilight, not looking at Celestia. She inhaled from her cigarette, and flicked the ash away from its tip with a hoof.

“Maybe,” said Celestia, “but still magnificent. I'll talk to you later. Sober up a bit, first, okay?”

Twilight nodded as Celestia withdrew her wing, and stood up.

“Princess?” said Twilight, lifting her head.

Celestia turned, and they locked eyes.

“What will you do with him?” She swallowed. “Shimmershine, I mean.”

“What I must, Twilight,” said Celestia; “Whatever I decide is best.”

Author's Note

Around this chapter was the point where I realized I had a decision to make: Either these ponies would be destroyed by their flaws, or they would rise above them. I've endured a lot of failure and disappointment in my own life. Everything you see in these characters is something that has been or still is wrong with me. I guess the rest of this book tells a lot about my own attitudes and perspectives.