I forget what day it is today, I don't really care anymore at this point. I've locked myself up in my room for what feels like weeks. I'm too scared to move, too scared to eat, even going to the bathroom feels like too much for me to handle. All I do now is I drink and sleep.
God, how I wish I didn't need to sleep.
Oh I'm sorry, I must be rambling.
My name, is Jacob. I'm a seventeen year old boy, with a loving family and fantastic friends named Angie, Jamie and J.T.
We used to hang out together all the time, me and the gang. Heh, we even used to watch ponies together. Which for the longest time, I was in denial of because I was so scared how they would react but turns out they liked the show just as much as me.
However, things weren't always so cheery and fun, my best friends all had secrets. Secrets I knew all too well of this year.
But, I'll get into that later.
You see, I don't really have much time and I want to put this down before I forget, so maybe someone else can find this and know what happened. I doubt it though.
You see, it all started out like any day as usual, I'd hang out with friends, play a few games and then come home to my computer.
I had been in the mood to watch ponies so I thought I'd look some up but weirdly enough, my computer was plagued with some kind of virus and because of that, I couldn't watch anything. Now for what caused it? Even the technician doesn't know but I did know that if I downloaded the episodes, they would work just fine.
'Strange.' I thought, Yet who could complain? When you finally have your shows to watch, you don't really care to think on how or why you just 'do'.
Yet strangely enough, I had to download the episodes of ponies on a foreign site, filled with all kinds of risky programs and such and it wasn't until I downloaded the Return of Harmony episodes did I get a very cheap and stupid screamer in my face. It was Discord, with his eyes black and dripping, his toothy grin at me, simply mocking. To top it off it even, well, screamed.
Yet as lame and as stupid as it was, It still ended up making me scream and falling out of my chair.
Other then that, life returned to normal again and I was able to enjoy my ponies, or at least as normal as my life could get anyways.
Yet one day, I had a dream. Or was it a Nightmare? I don't know anymore.
I just remember it being dark, there was no light, no signs, no road just darkness and yet for some reason, I could feel myself being watched. By who, I didn't know yet but every day I had the same dream and the same feeling.
And as I dreamt it felt like, it was closer. Like every time I turned I felt more anxious, more tense.
Of course, I shrugged off these dreams as just paranoid or nightmare's in general.
Then more came.
Now before I get into this dream, I have to explain to you about J.T.
He was my best friend, the most kindest, sweetest guy you would ever meet. In fact, he always had reminded me of Butterscotch, the male equivalent of Fluttershy from My Little Pony and needless to say he lived the act of her/him. Yet its true what they say, the most beautiful of smiles come from the most painful pasts.
J.T was, to put it bluntly, raped and abused by his father when he was young. It was because of this however that when his father was finally sealed away in jail, J.T didn't know any of it was wrong. So for the longest time, he punished himself by cutting, thinking that because he didn't know any better, he was dumb and deserved the pain. Yet we all knew, deep down, he did it because he was scared of his father coming back to punish him if he didn't do it himself.
Now with that being said, imagine that dark dream again but with only one spotlight of sorts on J.T.
His back was turned to me but who I saw next to him, scared me more then it should and that alone, gave me chills. It was Discord, he was smiling down at J.T from the side, as if he was silently saying something to him. Yet, I don't know how I would know this, as his lips didn't even move but his eyes just looked like they knew things, too many things.
J.T began shaking at this point as I saw his arm's being raised up by an invisible string. I tried to shout out his name but, I couldn't speak, hell I couldn't even move. Yet he was right there! I just felt so worthless.
But what happened next, broke my heart into a million pieces, J.T began crying. He was choking up, literally sobbing at the beast and yet Discord's smile never faltered, in fact, if anything it looked like he was starting to grin.
I watched in horror, as the freak placed his claws down on my best friend's wrist, ripping his tender skin, breaking a few veins along the way. J.T screamed and begged for him to stop, however the draconequus just silently and slowly continued, grinning wider and wider until I swear his mouth would break off.
I was crying at this point, desperate to escape this horrific dream, begging to wake up, yet my plea's weren't answered and instead my ears met another horrifying scream. At this point my eyes slammed shut, I just couldn't watch, I just felt nasty, seeing all of this, like I was committing the crime myself. Yet I knew that couldn't be true.
When I did open my eyes however -from more or so worrying about my best friend or if maybe I had finally woken up- I saw that Discord's talons were now raking through J.T's next wrist, blood seeming to pool up on the protruding nails.
Then I woke up.
Just like that, all of the pain and trauma ended in me jolting awake, sweating.
I want to tell you, it was all just a dream, that J.T was fine and laughing the next day but instead, what followed, caused me to trigger in alarm.
He was pale, walking like a defeated zombie and right there on his wrists, were giant bandages. The dream was real.
I wish it had ended there but these dreams never faltered and they became more frequent after a week or two passed.
I tried to stay awake more often after that, scared of what would follow if I finished any more dreams that came to me. Yet I still had more of J.T, each one with more added talons or claws piercing through his wrists, legs, arms or face. It was like Discord was taunting me, enjoying the pain I was going through as I watched my friends suffer. Still unable to do anything.
Needless to say, after so many markings showed up, J.T was thrown into a psychiatric ward, deemed unapproachable.
Why couldn't anyone see Discord but me? Couldn't they tell J.T was scared? That he didn't want any of this?
Yet despite the safety I thought my best friend was placed in, it didn't matter, I still dreamed about him being cut and attacked each night by Discord until finally, one afternoon, I got a call from J.T's mother, J.T was dead.
He was found in a pool of blood in a padded room, tied up in a straitjacket. The police are positive it was a murder, planned by J.T's father being released recently from jail that month. Funny, how that did seem like the right idea but not the truth.
As cruel as it was to think so, I thought that, now that J.T was dead I didn't have to be upset anymore when I slept, however the night after J.T's death, I gained another dream, this one about Jamie.
Jamie was my crush, I'm not afraid to say that anymore. She meant the world to me next to J.T and she was going through some demons of her own.
When I appeared in her dreams, I was near a very foggy but serene lake. It seemed nice to finally get a change of scenery next to just a dark room. I remember how at peace I felt, seeing that this was finally my first real dream in a long time.
Oh how wrong I was.
There, near the edge of the pond on the far right side was Jamie, she was being circled around by, none other then Discord. I couldn't see very well, since she was so far away but I remember the look of despair on her face as she felt burdened by something but again, Discord never spoke, he just smiled as he floated around her. Then, as if like a ghost she actually began to walk a bit towards the lake.
I couldn't see it before but behind her, was a weight shackled right to her ankles. It was at this point my pupil's dropped and again I tried to run towards her, screaming her name but again; nothing. Not even air came out of me as I tried to move in my solitary confinement.
When her feet had touched the surface of the water, I jolted awake once more.
It was at this point, I was determined to save Jamie. She was cursed by this plague and I was going to do everything in my power to save her!
I tried to get her to talk to me about this, anything at all to make her maybe even smile again but she, just like J.T, was pale and silent after the dream. So I began getting drastic and drinking energy drinks to stay awake, anything so I would not sleep.
It wasn't until day three however, did Jamie finally gain some color to tell me the story about her sister, Jessica. Rather reluctantly might I add.
When Jamie was a bit younger, she and her sister had a fight about Jessica's boyfriend, Jamie saying that he wasn't good enough for her and that he was nothing but trouble. This fight was in a pool however and simple splashing and curse words were just not enough, so they began dunking each other.
Jamie then explained to me that her greatest fear was drowning because of this and had almost died that day. Needless to say, they don't talk anymore.
I did ask her if she knew what she was doing in the dream but her reply was only a mumble, saying she did but she couldn't control herself.
The next day I tried to get more out of her but unfortunately she just didn't want to talk about it. I did understand but I was furious at her, I wanted to save her life! Why couldn't she understand that!? So I yelled, causing her to cry and run off.
I felt so horrible for what I had done, that I sobbed the entire day, passing out once I got home.
With such little sleep in me after four days, I couldn't seem to jerk awake from this dream no matter how hard I tried, causing Discord to provoke the nightmare even faster. Instead of slow paces, Jamie was walking gradually quicker to the lake and again, I tried to scream, warn her to stop but she just continued.
Jamie was not only gaining speed, Discord was as well. It seemed the closer she got to the surface, the quicker he circled her and his smile once again became a sickening grin. In fact, he looked about ready to start laughing.
Maybe he was...?
Her feet was touching the water now.
~~No.~~
Knee deep you could see her solemn face begin to break with desperation.
~~Please stop.~~
Half in, she was crying, her eyes were now closed which seemed to be the only control she had over her body at this point.
~~Its not fair.~~
Neck deep, she began to scream as her feet defied her, jolting me to again try and grasp her from so far away, the invisible restraint keeping me in place like a dog.
~~I loved you.~~
And then, silence. Nothing but bubbles surfaced the water as I shook and screamed for her to come back to me. Just begging the spirit that hovered over the murky waters but instead of any reply, he just looked at me and smiled.
He knew.
Jolting awake once more in a sweat, all I did was gasp before beginning to cry in a small bundle with my blankets. I just felt so broken, unneeded and pathetic. I wanted it all to end.
As much as I begged for the sweet release of death, I knew I wasn't allowed to enjoy it. A small sense of hope still rang through me, she could still be alive and so I rushed out of my house racing over to Jamie's. I could care less I was wearing the same clothes as the day before, nothing mattered to me, only Jamie.
But upon reaching her home, the police had beaten me to the chase. Apparently Jessica had found her sister's bed to be completely empty during the night and because as such, she had called them.
I waited, right beside her. I never even met Jessica before until now but I can easily tell you, we were both very worried for Jamie's life.
Did I tell her what was going on? How could I? It didn't even make sense to me.
Soon even Angie showed up, worried out of her mind about the whole ordeal, for obviously a good reason. Angie may have not spoken to J.T or Jamie very often but they were still friends, just like the rest of us.
The news soon came however, that Jamie was found in the nearby lake of our town, drowned to death.
Losing what little faith in God I had left, I went home and covered myself in my blankets once again, crying with all my might. If I was holding back before, I definitely wasn't now. Everything came out of me, screams, sobs, swears and even crying my hatred for My Little Pony.
My parents didn't stop me, for they were away at work. They thought I was already at school by this point but I just didn't care anymore.
I didn't even want to live.
It was at that point a thought hit me, I needed to stop crying. Not because I didn't want my parents to come home and hear me but because I knew if I didn't, I would have grown tired again and fell right back into the trap of needed sleep. I already knew, without even closing my eyes that Angie would be next.
No, I needed to stop this now or never.
So I did the only thing I could think of doing, I ran to my computer to look up that foreign site. It was a stretch to connect the screamer with all these killings but it was the only thing I had going for me. Angie was depending on me.
Yet as much as I looked and searched I couldn't find a single thing about the screamer. It was as if it never existed at all!
To make matters worse, my virus was gone. On any other circumstance I would be thrilled by this but for some reason, the lack of evidence that it was there at all frightened me. I had no proof, no leads, just guesses and the only thing that proved to show it happened at all was the crack in my monitor. For on the day I fell out of my chair from the screamer.
So what was I going to do now?
Well I had a few choices, I could consult with Angie to ask for any early dreams she had and trust her with this knowledge or I could sleep and try and embrace the new nightmare waiting for me. Both were very stupid idea's as there was no guarantee anything would work out, facing the nightmare always proved fruitless as I always became enclosed by some kind of barrier unable to move. Talking to Angie was a stupid idea because she was the less likely of them all to believe any crazy stories from any body. She was just hard headed like that.
Looking at the time I knew that my parent's would be home soon, so I needed to make a decision quick before they would start babying me to rest and relax after this whole charade.
So I gathered what little courage I had left and decided on finding Angie, she may be hard-headed but with whats been going on lately, she was bound to believe me after this. Usually one is gullible when no other explanation can be found, least that's what I was hoping for anyway.
Finding Angie however, became the hard part as she must have wanted her own place to be alone and cry. This of course wasted precious time.
Yet with enough searching I found her under the seats of the high school football field, alone in the shade, crying. I did my best to comfort her but I really just wanted to help her catch up with everything. Thankfully with her tears finally quelled, I decided to just erupt on her. Surprisingly though, she took the sudden explanation very well, believing every word.
You don't know how happy I was to finally get that off my chest.
Of course, she was still a bit skeptical, as anybody should be but agreed that it was the only thing to make sense so far. She knew deep down, our friends may have been through a lot but they would never kill themselves.
So with that all said and done, I decided to throw out some ideas on how to stop Discord but the more we spoke, the more we realized how bad they were. Most being special spells like Zecora to try and enter the dream in some special state which of course, in this world, was impossible. We didn't have magic like Twilight did.
It went on like that for hours until finally, we gave in and just held each other as we fell asleep.
Unfortunately, this is reality, you won't always find a solution or happy ending.
Yet surprisingly, as I became alive in the dream world once more, I realized I was still holding onto Angie! I tried waking her up and she soon after jolted up with me in surprise.
In fact, it wasn't until she and I began standing up did I realize I could actually move again! I never thought I'd feel so happy moving around.
But our excitement was soon quieted as I heard a small but menacing chuckle in the dark. Checking my surroundings, I realized I was in the dark dream again, with that one spotlight where I knew Angie was going to be if I didn't take the time to find her.
"Discord...?"
Another small chuckle.
Feeling anger reside within me, I roared at him to come out, in which he happily obliged to. It was at that moment I was welcomed by two red mis-matched pupils onto my green ones, I gasped in shock as I fell back, the spirit just bursting into laughter at my misery.
How dare he.
Angie however, as strong and independent as she was, feared the spirit and began backing away, only to be met by an invisible barrier behind her.
He was walking up to her. I needed to stop him. So all I could think to say, was: "WHY!"
At this, the spirit stopped his slow pace and just slowly turned to me as I found my feet to stand up again.
"Why...?" He purred, making my hair rise up in the back of my neck. How I hated him so.
Yet he simply turned to me and began pacing after. "Because, I'm the Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony~ Or did you forget that?" He chuckled once more, making me all the more enraged as I backed away from him. If Angie was doing anything at this point, I wouldn't know, I was too focused on the monster.
Wait, disharmony?
This... This was his job? Is that what he was trying to say?
"Yes." He simply said, hearing my thoughts loud and clear, causing me to flinch.
Yet to my dismay, he was approaching me even closer. A look of insanity in his eyes.
"I'm the father that raped your friend..." He began grinning at me.
"I'm the blade that cuts your wrists..." I could feel my back hit something.
"I'm the water, suffocating your lungs..." His breath was close, I could feel it on my neck, my skin and my ears.
"And I'm the fear..." He whispered now, seeming to smile as he spoke, delighted in his own voice, as well as his power and his control over me. "...Of losing a friend."
So afraid, so scared, can't look, can't see, don't want to see, don't want to feel.
Then suddenly a scream.
My shut eyes flashed open, to see Angie trying to hit Discord but in her haste, screamed once more at being captured by the supposed family cartoon spirit from behind.
His tail was around her legs, causing her to be unable to move, his paw over her mouth and his talons leaving mock traces across her throat.
He wouldn't.
"Please, stop..." I could hear my friend begging him but he would just shush her, his eyes still on me with that sadistic, disgusting smile. I felt sick.
"It must be so hard." He began, his voice taunting. "Being different."
Angie stiffened, as if she was controlled by something, her face becoming solemn. What was he doing to her?
"Remember when Daddy would beat you Angie?" He whispered, his eyes narrowing on her. "Just because you were different?"
I could see the color draining from her face.
"Angie no, please, don't listen." I tried to walk toward her but I was soon stuck again, unable to move. A barrier stopping my path.
Discord's claws were playing with her hair now, almost in a soothing manner, which I think was a taunt of how Angie's mom used to caress her.
"Remember when Daddy found out? Oh he was so mad." His talons were pressing into her neck far too tight for my liking.
I tried to speak again but now my voice was becoming quieted again. No, please, not again! Leave Angie alone!
"He'd beat mommy up too just because he didn't like it. He was such a mean Daddy wasn't he...?" I could see blood forming on her neck as tears stream down her cheek, the color gone from her entirely.
I don't know why I didn't see it before but now I knew what was happening, he was discording my friends, every single time. That's why they were so pale, so broken and solemn, they couldn't fight back because it was the truth.
"Daddy..." Angie choked, causing my heart to break once more.
"There, there, I know it hurts. Just let it out... Just let it all out." The Draconequus whispered coldly, yet she did, she exploded with tears and sobs and he was beginning to smile at the sight. However what he said next, chilled me to the core and yet again I couldn't move.
"I can end it." He said simply, causing some form of life in her eyes, a kind of hope that I wasn't able to see for such a long time.
"You can...?"
"Yes." He snickered. "Just close your eyes and you'll be free. No one will ever judge you, ever again." The crimson spill around his talons were becoming darker.
I knew what he was going to do, I knew, yet I couldn't do a single thing but watch.
"Free..." She simply said with a smile as she closed her eyes, even pulling her neck up to feel the cut more deeply.
"Free." He repeated, slicing her throat slowly, a gurgle and choke escaping Angie's lips as she grinned.
Yet despite the grin, she was crying and soon, her head fell right off her body and I screamed.
I screamed so hard, so loud and yet all I heard before I woke up, was the laughter of Discord. A sound, I became terrified of all the way home.
+++
And now I'm here, alone in my room, trying to remember my friends and what we had together.
Yet all I can hear, is his laughter and his voice, taunting me, playing with me.
Unlike the other's, he hasn't killed me in my dreams. Instead, all I see, is a chair and a noose.
At first it was whispers, then it became shouts. Discord was even pushing me closer to the noose, helping me get to my own suicide.
Even now as I'm writing this, I can still hear him, whispering and urging me on to kill myself.
I was able to avoid it for a while but I knew once I told you my story, I'd be able to go through with it. I'm not scared, I'm excited, I know I'll finally be free, away from this horrid world and with my other friends.
The noose is calling me now.
Goodbye.
Author's Note
You probably are all wondering why I bothered to add that so called "screamer" in the story.
Well, it was basically Discord's way of mocking the method of infiltrating a home through fear. He wanted Jacob to disregard it entirely because he knew he would see it as nothing more but a harmless prank.
So in the end, when he couldn't find any trace of the virus of the so called screamer, he began to panic, realizing not only was it the true culprit of Discord's appearance but also an untraceable one.
Through the simple excuse of assumption, Jacob was boned from the very beginning and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it.
