Dear diary...
(...)
…so I tumbled behind another apple tree and gave a peek from behind it and saw that apple-pony Applejack was still doing her apple-pony apple-chores and her apple-pony apple-eyes didn't see me sneaking up on her apple-pony apple-rump.
First tumble: undetected. First phase of my plan (which I totally have planned out and am TOTALLY not making up stuff on the fly!) complete. Phase two is going to be a cakewalk... with almonds and fruit sprinkles serving as my backup.
I giggled and then gasped (like, VERY loud!) and then I hid again quickly behind the tree because I didn’t know if she heard my giggle and even if she didn’t hear it I didn’t know if she still could have heard my gasp (GASP! I hope not! I don’t want her to find me so quickly when I didn’t even get to pull one of my famous Pinkie Pranks on her! That would be sooooo unfair!), and if she heard me gasping or giggling then I would have ABSOLUTELY NO CHANCE with any of my pranks I have planned for her (Oh, look! I already said almost the same stuff a bit earlier in those bracket-thingies! Neato!).
Where was I? Oh, right! So I tumbled and then giggled and then GASP!ed and then I hid and then for some time I wasn’t sure if she could hear me or not so I looked from behind the tree again and saw that she WAS STILL WORKING WITH HER APPLES AND PULLING A CART AND DIDN’T EVEN A LITTLE SEE OR HEAR ME WHEN I DID ALL OF THAT STUFF THAT MADE ME THINK THAT SHE WOULD ABSOLUTIVELY POSILUTELY BECOME KNOWING OF ME BEING THERE! BUT SHE DIDN’T!
Not only she didn't hear me being there or see me being there or even FEEL me being there (honestly! Who throws a cupcake??), but she also didn't see me WHILE LOOKING STRAIGHT AT ME WHEN I WAS PEEKING AT HER FROM BEHIND THE TREE AND YET SHE DIDN'T SEE ME EVEN THOUGH I COULD SEE HER AS EASY AS THE BACK OF MY OWN HOOF!) No, really... and I wasn't even hiding that good... what gives? Applejack, I am disappoint...
APPLEJACK: ZERO, PINKIE PIE: ONE! YOU'D BETTER DO BETTER NEXT TIME I HIDE FROM YOU, APPLEJACK! BECAUSE IT WILL THEN BE FOR REAL!!!
SO ANYWAYS THERE I WAS BEHIND THAT SAME BIG OL’ BORING APPLE TREE AND I WAS WA—
…wait. Why am I shouting at my diary? …Nevermind… So anyways, like I said, I was there behind this REALLY big, REALLY old and REALLY REALLY REALLY boring apple tree which was exactly JUST like eleventeen bajillion other apple trees in Applejack’s orchard, and I was waiting for Applejack (Also Known As “My Silly Appley Pony PFF Forever”!) to turn around and let me sneak behind her at least A LITTLE ITTLE-BITTLE TEENY-WEENY bittiest bit closer! Just a little bit more! Honest! That’s all I needed!
…And she DID turn!!! And I DID sneak behind her – and that wasn’t a tiny bit at all! In fact, it was a BIG bit! It was the biggest big bit you would ever see in your life (unless you got really lucky and saw some REALLY big bits in your life (like a mountain (or a cartload of carrots (or a strawberry cake apple pie banana cream chocolate sauce sundae with a single sugar-coated cherry on top))))! And then I tackled her and hugged her! (they call those things “tackle-hugs”, right??) And she was SO surprised! Like you don't even KNOW! AHAHAHAHA! She just dropped the baskets that she was about to put on the cart and– and– BAHAHAHAHAHA!!! You would have to be there and see it! There's NO WAY to say in words just how– how FUNNY that looked!
(No! I am not gonna "try to do it anyways"! I just TOLD YOU! It is IMPOSSIBLE!!!)
…okay, I know (or at least I think I do) that I promised you (or did I? I’m not sure…) that I was sneaking to Applejack to try on her one of my better pranks, so I could share it with you, right? Well… I KNOOOOW this was def-O NOT a prank (more like a… something…) …but it still was FUN, don’t’cha think??
I mean, AJ was surprised and I got to call her a silly pony and we hugged again and then I apologized and then she told me it was nothing and that she actually "appreciated the gesture because I've been down recently, Sugahcube" — AND THEN SHE GAVE ME ONE OF THOSE FAMOUS GRANNY SMITH’S APPLE PIES! MMMMMM~!!! ♥ THEY WERE SOOOOO SWEEEEET~! ...AND IT WAS AWESOME!
It was the best prank-(but not really)-gone-wrong-(but also not really) EVER!!!
(This must’ve been at least as fun to read about as it would be to read if I wrote about that prank I promised, right? Dear-diary-which-sadly-can't-respond-to-me-so-I-am-just-left-here-talking-to-myself-and-doing-nothing-but-watching-as-the-ink-dries-on-your-pages-oh-GOSH-it-takes-forever-why-won't-you-get-dry-already-so-I-can-put-you-away-and-play?!)
…or maybe it WAS a prank after all? What do YOU think, diary? Or maybe… Oh, I have NO IDEA what it was! (Well,maybe it was “me being Pinkie Pie”..? Ponies keep saying that stuff when I act like that – which is ALWAYS!)
But it still was AWESOME! (I know I repeat myself but it WAS awesome!) – and again, the apple pie tasted GREAT! (“ApplePie”..? AAAHHHH!!! Dirty thoughts! Begone! BEGONE!! PINKIE PIE COMMANDS IT!!!).
Anyways, I TOTALLY have to do more surprise visits like this to my friends! I bet they will from now on be only BETTER AND BETTERERER! I mean, how could they NOT be??
Okay! Enough talking – I mean writing! I have more things to do today! Starting with another surprise visit to one of my friends!
Soooo... Three! Two! One! GO!!! Next destination: Fluttershy’s!
(I wonder if she likes surprise (but super-gentle!) tackle hugs too~)
(...)
Author's Note
Too much bold text? To many explanations and all-caps? Blame Pinkie. I only write how I believe she would.
(Excluding a single block of run-on text which would be TOO MUCH for poor readers' eyes...)