Chapter 1: Preparations
By: The Meta
Sunrise fell upon Ponyville in a stunning array of color and illumination. As each luminescent ray of gold draped itself across the slumbering town, the scene began to awake in typical spring fashion. Dew drenched flora gleamed happily in Celestia’s glorious sun. The flowers appeared to grin in delight at the magnificent warmth, the trees themselves perked up; their chattering animal inhabitants basking in the glow of a bright new day. Another bright, marvelous day. Anypony might say that today would be just like any other; beautiful, the perfect spring day. However, for one particular pony, this day was rather extraordinary. And so it happened that this pink, poofy maned panache pony pranced peculiarly towards the town library.
“Twilight! Ooh Twilight! Get up! I need your help with something!” Pinkie beamed expansively as she hollered, upon arriving before Twilight Sparkle’s leafy abode.
“Ugh, is that you Pinkie Pie? What could you possibly need help with this early in the morning?” A peeved, lavender unicorn appeared through one of the library’s windows. Twilight’s mane splayed about largely unkempt, and her violet eyes were lidded in half-slumber. “It’s just past sunrise, and I had to stay up late last night to catch up on my studies.”
“Twilight, you are up!” Pinkie said, positively buzzing with glee.
“Well now I am, obviously.” came the reply, a note of irritation creeping into Twilight’s voice. She wondered what could have made Pinkie so delighted. The earth pony was aboundingly joyful, even by her everyday standards. “Now Pinkie, what do you...?”
“Oh good, cause I thought that maybe I came too early...”
“Pinkie...” Twilight attempted to interrupt.
“...and that I would have to wake you up and...”
“Pinkie...”
“...then you would be annoyed because I woke you and...”
“Pink...”
“...then I’d have trouble getting your help with the...”
“PINKIE!!!” Twilight finally managed to interject.
“Er, yes Twilight?” Pinkie responded sheepishly, her hyperactivity dieing down a notch.
“Thank you,” Twilight sighed, truly grateful for the silence, ”Now, what do you need my help with?”
“Wha -- Oh yeah! Do you think you could get some fireworks for me?” Pinkie answered, oblivious to Twilight’s discomposure.
“Fireworks?” pondered Twilight, “Actually, I think I might have some left over from last ti...wait. What do you need them for?” questioned Twilight. She recalled the previous occasion Pinkie Pie had requested fireworks; the Town Hall had been set ablaze, and for three days after most of Ponyville had been blanketed in descending ash. “We don’t want to have another fiasco like before. I hear that they’re still finding soot in the town park.”
Pinkie Pie, worryingly, remained unperturbed. “Oh don’t worry Twilight, I learned my lesson from last time; now I know it’s not safe to set off that many fireworks all at once! You've got nothing to worry about Twi. You can count on me!” reassured the astonishingly perky pink pony, while attempting to contort her expression into one of sincerity. It didn’t work.
“Of course Pinkie,” conceded Twilight sceptically, “I’ll see if I can find them some for you. One last thing though; what do you need them for?”
“Ribbons? But of I course have lots of ribbons Pinkie Pie,” said Rarity to her rather exuberant guest. The unicorn was confused; Pinkie did not often visit her Boutique, not being a pony who took pride in beautiful clothing. “Or beauty in general” thought Rarity, scrutinizing, as she aways did, Pinkie’s chaotic mane and arbitrary presentation on the whole.
“Ooooh yes Rarity,” quickly asserted Pinkie, springing around the room in what could be observed as an enhanced sugar high. “Ribbons are just what I need. Oh, these will be perfect!”
“Perfect for what Pinkie?” questioned Rarity, utterly bemused, “I simply cannot imagine what you could possibly need these for. Decorating maybe? Pinkie Pie, are you taking up interior design? Because if not I can’t think of any other explanation why...” The white unicorn paused as a thought spawned, then ricocheted inside her mind. “Pinkie Pie,” Rarity inquired cautiously, “do you need these ribbons for...?”
***CRASH***
“Oops. Sorry.” apologized Pinkie, sheepishly. The hyperactive pony appeared to have accidentally constructed a rather large circle of destruction, and general mayhem, turning the fashionista’s pristine workspace into a cluttered shambles. It could almost have been labeled “modern art”.
“PINKI...”
“...IE PIIIIIEEEEE!!!”
“Wha’ ‘n the hay was tha’?” wondered a certain orange farm pony.
“Oh, I’m sure it was nothing Applejack.”
“BUH! Oh Pinkie, ya scared me there. Don’t sneak up on anypony like tha’.” Applejack, for of course it was she, turned to face the bubbling mess of pastel pink that had appeared like lightning before her. “I’m sure ya weren’ there a second ago...”
Pinkie Pie proceeded to launch into a breathless tirade. “Oh, sorry about that Applejack, I wish I could have announced myself, you know, told me I was coming, but I sorta couldn’t do that ‘cause I had to get here really fast. You see, I had to escape from Rarity’s and...”
“Hold up there Pinkie. Ya had ta escape?!” asked Applejack, clamping a firm hoof over Pinkie’s mouth. “Wha’ ‘n Equestia did ya do now?!”
Pinkie released herself from Applejack’s hold in order to reply. “Umm. Would you take ‘nothing’ for an answer?” queried Pinkie hopefully, amazingly composed for a pony who just galloped across town. Or didn’t gallop...
“No, but Ah don’ suppose Ah’ll be gettin’ anythin’ else outta you am I?” answered Applejack. She continued walking towards the Northern apple field of Sweet Apple Acres; the apple trees there needed bucking in order for the Apple family to remain on schedule with their crop. “Now Pinkie, before Ah get back to work, is there anythin’ Ah can help ya with?”
“Actuallyyy,” considered the pink mare, “I was wondering if you were using your barn tomorrow night. Oh wait. Silly me!” giggled Pinkie, “You use it all year round! What I mean is, do you think I could use it tomorrow night?” Pinkie Pie happily skipped after Applejack, her curly mane bobbing up and down in rhythm with her energetic prances.
“Sure, Ah, er...Ah guess.” replied Applejack haltingly. Then, like her speech, Applejack paused abruptly. “Wait on a gosh darn minute here. Pinkie Pie, what do want to do with mah barn?” questioned Applejack, worried for the structural integrity of the Apple family’s hay repository.
“Isn’t it obvious?! A PARTY!!” exclaimed Pinkie, throwing her forelegs up in the air in celebration.
“A party? Really? What’s it for?” asked Applejack, intrigued. Pinkie Pie was renowned for throwing the most extravagant parties in all Equestia. Applejack recalled at one such party, that she, Applejack, had danced herself to exhaustion, and had woken up the following day’s following morning in Twilight’s bed and not a clue what had occurred. But that’s a story for another time.
“A party? Yes! Really? YES!! What’s it for?! A BIRTHDAY!!!” whooped Pinkie Pie as she bounced dynamically around the utterly befuddled farm pony.
“Well that’s great sugarcube! Just; calm down for a moment while Ah sort somethin’ out.”
The vibrant mare surprisingly calmed down and beamed joyfully at Applejack in expectation.
“Er, right. Wasn’t expecting that to work.” thought Applejack, rather stunned that Pinkie, who was jumping across the rooftops of Ponyville on the best of days, had actually settled enough to hear her out. “Now Pinkie, who’s birthday is it that you’re throwin’ this here party for?”
At this, the pink pony’s smile engorged exponentially, her mane began to fizzle with pent up energy, her entire body began to jitter uncontrollably. Applejack took several cautious steps back, moments before Pinkie Pie exploded. The exuberant equine leaped into the air and proclaimed:
“FLUTTERSHY’S!!!”
“Huh...? Fluttersh...”
“CUUUEEEE TITLE SEQUENCE!!!”
“What?! Pinkie what are yo...”
Musical Number: This is the Greatest Party of all parties you have ever seen
Title: This is the Greatest Party of all parties you have ever seen
Lyrics by: The Meta
Tune: “I am the very Model of a Modern Major-General” by Gilbert and Sullivan, from the Pirates of Penzance
Listen to this:
“Slow version” If you want to try and sing along with it well, and don’t mind missing choral tunes.
“Fast version” If you want to try and sing along with it, or just show off...This has all the choral tunes though, not just the solo.
Note: Every word must be said/sung succinctly, with all it’s syllables, unless otherwise specified. Except sarsaparilla, say that the normal way; Pinkie says it that way. E.g. defilement--> de-fi-le-ment
Verse 1
Pinkie Pie:
This is the Greatest party of all parties you have ever seen,
With tonnes of stuff like big balloons, fun games and party guests so keen,
This party’s for your birthday my dear Fluttershy, so feel at home,
With all the greatest ponies out from Ponyville that I could comb.
It’s got the biggest food buffet that any pony’d ever need,
With cupcakes, punch ,cookies and sweets, for ev’rypony which to feed,
The drinks as well, we have a huge ginormous big variety,
“Hmm. What rhymes with variety? Ooh, I know!”
With sundaes, sarsaparilla, and some stuff for high society!
All guests:
With sundaes, sarsaparilla, and some stuff for high society!
With sundaes, sarsaparilla, and some stuff for high society!
With sundaes, sarsaparilla, and some stuff for high socie-cie-tyyy!!!
Pinkie Pie:
As you can see, the food is of the best in all of Ponyville,
The bev’rages that we’ve served up are sure to give you all a thrill,
In short, with stuff like big balloons, fun games and party guests so keen,
This is the Greatest party of all parties you have ever seen!
All guests:
In short, with stuff like big balloons, fun games and party guests so keen,
This is the Greatest party of all parties you have ever seen!!!
Verse 2
Pinkie Pie:
The decorations you can see are courtesy Rarity,
So let us all be grateful for her gift of gen’rous charity,
Say “thank you” for these banners, and these ribbons oh so colorful,
So vibrant and so cheerful, that they make us all feel wonderful.
And finally the party games that we have here are very fun,
They’ve winners and no losers, so they make us all feel number one,
With games like Treasure Hunt, and Apple Bobs for our beguilement,
“...What in Equestia rhymes with that?!”
“Oh no! The only word that rhymes with ‘beguilement’ is ‘defilement’! What am I going to do?!”
“*GASP* Got it!”
This party’s got so many things to do it’s so convenient!
All guests:
This party’s got so many things to do it’s so convenient!
This party’s got so many things to do it’s so convenient!
This party’s got so many things to do it’s so conveni-veni-eeent!!!
Pinkie Pie:
Oh come on reader what on Earth did you expect for me to say?
I couldn’t possibly have used ‘defilement’, but anyway,
In short, with stuff like big balloons, fun games and party guests so keen,
This is the Greatest party of all parties you have ever seen!!!
All guests:
In short, with stuff like big balloons, fun games and party guests so keen,
This is the Greatest party of all parties you have ever seen!!!
Verse 3
Pinkie Pie:
In fact, because this party is the party that has got it all,
The fairy lights, the streamers, and the ribbons that all line the wall,
As well as all the cooking that is sure to give you all a pudge,
Like birthday cake, and candy and all of the kinds of yummy fudge.
The range of recreational activities is quite a sight,
They’re here for your enjoyment and amusement, don’t you know that’s right,
And don’t forget the party guests whom I’ve invited here tonight,
“Hmm tonight, tooonight, toniiighht...Aha!”
They’ve come here just for you, dear Fluttershy, I’m sure, to your delight!
All guests:
We’ve come here just for you, dear Fluttershy, we’re sure, to your delight!
We’ve come here just for you, dear Fluttershy, we’re sure, to your delight!
We’ve come here just for you, dear Fluttershy, we’re sure, to your deli-deliiight!
Pinkie Pie:
This birthday party was thrown for you by yours truly Pinkie Pie,
To say a great big ‘Happy Birthday’ to you, my dear Fluttershy,
Because, with stuff like big balloons, fun games and party guests so keen,
This is the Greatest party of all parties you have ever seen!
All guests:
Because, with stuff like big balloons, fun games and party guests so keen,
This is the Greatest party of all parties you have ever seen!!!
