White Zinfandel

by TheSillyAnon

ACT 1: Ejection

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"Run left daddy! Oh yeah and dad..."

Magnus turned around to his daughter to give her his full attention. "Yeah what's up, munchkin?"

"...give them hell."

With a smirk on his lips, he nods to her and places the helmet on his head. Proudly marching down the field, he whispers to himself, commending his daughter for her inpirational, yet questionable, choice of words.

"Atta' girl!"

Magnus reaches the other players as they stared at the little filly on the sidelines, amazed and in shock at the advice she had given to her father.

"Dude, did your kid just tell you to quote-unquote, give them hell?"

"Why yes, yes she did." Magnus stated proudly as he peeked back over to the sidelines to get a glimpse of his daughter.

"Your daughter... Boy, whatever stallion get's her is going to have hell on this Earth. She a tough one!" Says Jetwing, who played wide receiver (WR).

"Shit, man. Gotta colt ova'ere mad as hell. I want one just like 'ah. Of course, grown up" Admitted Screenshot, who played the quarterback position (QB).

"Can't make 'em like me boys." Said Magnus as he got in position.

"Shid, can try tho.” Screenshot mumbled as he was about to call the play. Jet only shook his head before assuming his position as Screenshot carried out the play. "BLUE 58! BLUE 58! Set... HUT!"

The sound of bodies crashing against one another became the overture of the night as the offensive line (O-Line) tried to buy some time for the QB to make his decision. Screenshot looked to his right to see that Magnus was running to him to fake the hoofoff. As their paths cross, Magnus tucked the 'ball' into himself as he ran to the left side. There was little to no protection from penetration on that side and all the defensive effort went to the right. At that moment he realized something that amazed him; his daughter was right.

Screenshot was looking down field to see if there was somepony open, but failed to receive enough time to do so as a defensive lineman broke the o-line and made his way to the QB for a blitz. Screenshot realized that this was not a good idea at all so he decided to toss the ball away to prevent the loss of yards as he was wrapped up for the would-have-been sack.

As the ref blew his whistle, Magnus signaled to the QB to run the play again. Screenshot looked at his running back (RB) with a puzzled look on his face as Magnus closed the distance between them. Magnus made his case.

"Now I know this is gonna sound crazy as hell, but my daughter told me to run left. And as I ran left, I found that we were completely cleared for a mile in that outside zone."

"Bruh, these boys are on my ass. Are you sure this shit will work?"

"Give me the ball, and I will give you the first down."

"...Ten, no less mane."

"Gotcha."

Magnus ran to his position to the right side as the QB ran the same play, the center bowing down to spike the ball on command. Screenshot made his calls. "BLUE 58! BLUE 58! Set-HUT!"

The sounds of bodies once again filled their ears as the O-line kept pushing the defensive effort to a standstill. Running in from the far right side was none other than Southwind. Magnus came in behind Screenshot as the QB hoofed the ball over to his RB. Magnus took the ball into his possession as he took to the left side of the field. Bolting past an angry Southwind, he darts past the line of scrimmage and down the left sideline. As he bursts into a full gallop, he looks to his right to see that a line back (LB) was coming at him full-speed. As he crossed the spot where the chains marked the first down, he sprinted once more to give himself some more yards as the LB dove into him, catching only his hooves. Magnus tripped over the forelegs of the LB and fell to the ground while keeping the ball secure.

As the whistle blew once more, he looked at his current position as he tried to identify how many yards he gained. He noticed that he was about three yards out from where the first down marker was. So he estimated it was a gain of about thirteen yards. Soon after the chains were moved and the line of scrimmage was relocated to his down, his team rejoined him once again as they cheered him on for his gain. Receiving the occasional slap on the flank and helm-slap, he assumed his position once more as the defensive line rushed into position.

"GREEN 36! GREEN 36!" Set...HUT!

Soon after, the offensive line opened up a hole in the center of the formation to which they could run the ball. Magnus grabbed the ball and pushed it through the opening and past the line of scrimmage. Once again making a break for it, he juked two defenders as he spun out of a tackle that slowed him briefly as he resumed his usual running speed. And just like that, he was gone.

"The crowd cheered and screamed erratically as Magnus ran it all the way to the endzone for a sixty-five yard run. Trying to catch his breath, he spun the ball in the endzone and started beating on his chest, screaming to the heavens above. Much of his team felt his enthusiasm, as did the crowd. The scoreboard read 6-0 and the time remaining was 13:44 in the first quarter. They managed to complete a touchdown drive in a matter of one minute and sixteen seconds, the quickest drive they ever pulled off all season.

Rarity screamed and jumped with joy at the accomplishments of her father. She gestured him to come on over immediately so she could give him a big hug. As he crossed to the outside, his daughter leapt to him with open forelegs as she squeezed what little air he still had in his system out. His job done for the moment, he finally decided that it was time to fire up his usual sideline chat. Rarity levitated a small cup of water to him as he thanked her with his smiles. In times like these he would think to himself that this was his day job. This was his profession, and more importantly this was something that even his daughter invested her time with. This was his life, and he loved it.

And nothing could possibly take that away from him.


"Hey I have one question?"

Twilight Sparkle was playing house with her Smarty Pants doll as she looked to her foalsitter, who was listening to the radio broadcast of the game in progress. She may have not been a big sports fanatic, but she knew how to keep up with the game.

"And what's that, my dear?" She asked as she levitated a small cup of tea to her lips.

"Do you think Shining likes you?"

The alacorn foalsitter did not know that for certain, but she did know that she wanted him. And during the past four months of her teasing him and trying to get close to him, he did not make so much of a move on her. That concerned her because it meant that she had some sort of competition that he managed to hide very well. That didn't sit well with her.

"...well, I guess he does." She lied to herself, trying to convince herself that she couldn't lose.

"Another question."

"Shoot."

"Why haven't you told him your real name?" Twilight asked as she placed her doll on her back and trotted around the room.

"Well... It goes like this..." She started as she placed the tea on the table beside the chair. "If I told ponies my real name, then they would... treat me different."

"Really? Okay then, what's wrong with being a princess?"

The foalsitter looked at the fireplace that burned across the room as she remembered much of her youth. " *sigh* Everything..."

Twilight could hear the sadness in her voice and stopped trotting to give her foalsitter her full attention. "Why?"

"...Because... Ponies hold you on a pedestal for all to see. They worship you as if you were some sort of god and even to the point where they'd try to bring offerings and sacrifices."

"What kind of offerings and sacrifices?"

"Well... Offerings of being in love, wanting to spend the rest of their lives with you and trying to become your significant other, but in truth all they want to do is say that they've bedded a princess or the fact that they could maintain the title of prince as soon as they marry me. And sacrifices..."

The young filly awaited her foalsitter to continue her statement as she took a moment to reflect.

"...Sacrifices were made in order to see that I could be happy, so that I could be safe from all of those who would abuse their power if they were to get close to me."

"Really? That's so romantic." Twilight sang with glee in hearing that such acts of chivalry existed. But her foalsitter did not share the enthusiasm.

"It would've been, if it wasn't for the fact that the few guards that had gotten close to me..."

Twilight's smile disappeared as she heard the pause in her sentence. "I... so sorry."

" *sigh* 'It is my duty to protect the crown, and in your name shall I defend your honor'. Every last one of them said that. Every last one of them held true to that promise. And every last one of them died holding on to that promise. It's been four times since I've fallen in love to suddenly have that forcefully taken away from me. So I distanced myself from whatever guard that confessed their feelings to me."

"Do you ever regret doing that to them?" Twilight asks as she trots slowly to her foalsitter.

"I don't. Even though some of them were driven mad at the fact that they couldn't have my heart. And in the end, they ended up transforming from chivalrous to self-centered, selfish, rude, disrespectful and only wished to defame my name to increase their reputation."

"So what did you do next?"

"Nothing. I turned all of them down as the years went by. The love I saw in them was only for themselves. Ultimately, I decided that it was best for me to leave altogether, go into hiding and ultimately find my own happiness."

"And Princess Celestia allowed you to do it?"

"Well... Yeah surprisingly. She even filed all the paperwork to give me alternative names that I could use. So she created the name Amora Fairweather that I may use in my daily commute. But those who I thought I could trust would identify me as Cadance, upon my request of course."

"Because you knew that they wouldn't tell anypony about your existance. But that leaves only one question; why only me and my father?"

"Because your father is a very honest pony, and he does what he can to protect this country and more importanly, his family who lives within it. You... well you were just too cute for me to hide from."

"But what makes you think that I won't tell anypony?"

"Because then I'd have to stop baking you cookies."

Twilight stood still as if she were made of stone. If there was one thing that she didn't want to part ways with, it was Cadance's chocolate chip oatmeal cookies. "...Anything but the cookies."

Cadance laughed at the filly and nuzzled her gently as she reassured her that she would still bake the cookies for her, even if she was found out. Twilight cheered immediately afterwards, when the radio suddenly joined in on her cheering.

"And he's in! TOUCHDOWN CHEVALIERS! A thirty-six yard pass completed on the inside. The score is now thirteen-nothing.

Both of the girls jumped in place as they heard the news on the radio.

"Yay! We made another touchdown!"


"And that's it for the half folks! Your score going into halftime is fourteen-three Chevaliers. And we will have Mark and Mark for this evening's halftime report. I'm John Maredden, signing out until the start of the second half."

The press box was silent after those words fell through the airwaves. Shining sat in the seat with his hooves covering his head. The reality of the situation that he was in had finally settled in as his future seemingly crashed and burned right in front of his eyes. His eyes remained opened as he imagined the many lives that he managed to affect as well as the marriage that he managed to destroy.

Pearl sat on the chair next to him as she continued to cradle the unborn life that slept within her. She was in a mix of emotions, varying from happy and joyful to sad and worried. She was having a foal and it was by the stallion that she shared her lot with instead of it being with the very individual who she swore her life to. She betrayed the one whom she loved, but at the same time she was now carrying a son with the one that she had grown to make love to. She was in a crisis, she loved Shining Armor but was in love with the stallion she knew since high school. It tore her apart, but she knew that she had to give her love to someone and for them to willingly accept it.

She turned her head to the distraught teen stallion that sat next to her. He's been like that since the start of the game and he hasn't moved from that position since. In the past four months, she's been comforted by the stallion that made her feel more of a mare than the one she married. He made her feel special, so special that she extended her weekend stays a full day. Rarity liked it because it meant that she could get to spend time with him outside of writing letters, but she liked it even more because she wanted to share her feelings with him, although he never really got the hint. But the real reason their stays were extended was because she took the time to literally go on dates with Shining Armor. Which brought up another thing in her head.

Rarity liked Shining Armor and wanted him for herself. Now she couldn't have him no matter how hard she tried thanks to her mother. She would have a younger sibling that wouldn't even be conceived in the same matter as her. She was going to have a foal that would not only bring joy to Rarity's life but also sorrow because her knight would be courted to another mare, more specifically her mother. And Rarity would never trust her again. So many things that could've gone wrong actually went wrong and now they had to deal with play they made.

"..." Pearl wanted to say something to comfort him. But what could she say?

"..." He wanted to share his feelings on the matter, but words failed him once more.

"..." What could she say to him as his future would be taken away from him?

"..." What could he say to her as her marriage erupted in a sea of fires and ashes?

"..." How would she explain it to the one whom she betrayed.

"..." How would he tell the one who placed his trust in him.

"..."

How could either of them start this conversation.

".... Shining Armo-"

"I need some time alone..." He finally spoke as he finally found the strength to raise himself off of the sofa. Pearl reached out to him in hopes of keeping his company, but he continued to make his way to the elevator doors. Pearl removed herself from the sofa as well in an attempt to intercept the cadet, galloping in desperation as he raised his hoof to the button of the elevator. She succeeds in her mission as she shoves his hoof out of the way and wraps her forelegs around him once more as she looks into his eyes.

His eyes seemed as if they were distant, looking at an endless sea to which he was stranded upon. For a thousand yards, he stared into the watery wastelands as she tried to bring his attention to her once again. She took her hooves from around him to caress the features upon his face as he broke out of his stare, looking down to her. Trembling, inched her muzzle to his and sank her lips in his. The quivering flesh softly cushioned their impact against one another as she clenched her eyes closed, trying to put everything in to that one kiss.

Shining Armor had different plans however. He struggled as he tried to separate himself from the mother of his unborn foal, but she held herself against him with all of her strength. He then backed away, breaking off the kiss as she opened her eyes in shock of his absence. She aims to reconnect with him one last time but he refuses, shoving a hoof against her as she launched herself at him.

"Please." Pearl pleaded in a whisper as he shot his magic at the button and the door opened.

"Please dearest. I-I-" She stuttered as she tried to keep him from leaving, not wanting her last possible sanctuary of her affection to vanish without a trace.

"Let me go."

"No!"

"Please let me go-"

"NO PLEASE! DON'T LEAVE ME..."

Shining pushed all of his weight against her as she desperately tried to hold him out of the elevator. Finally having the aptitude to use his magic again, he telekinetically brushed aside Pearl, who in turn lock his hind legs in place with her magic. He uses all of his physical strength to pull away from the light blue auras that entrapped him. Pearl can feel that her magic was weakening considerably as he began to free himself from her grasp.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

Pearl produced the most bloodcurdling scream that she could ever unleash as the teen cadet finally freed himself and launched himself into the elevator. Her screams of despair failed to reach him as he pushed her further into the press box and held the close button. His final view was that of a charging Pearl with tears of black streaming down her face. One final scream was heard before the doors sealed off a majority of it's volume. Pearl banged on the doors as Shining quickly hit the button that lead to the first floor. As he descended, he backed himself into the far corner of the elevator as he heard one final scream.

"SHINING ARMOOOOOOR!"


Meanwhile in the Seaponies locker room.

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!"

"...Hoofball coa-"

"Try again! That wasn't anything near the Hoofball game that I taught you to play. That was a fucking bloodbath and your sorry asses are the water supply."

"Coach, just let me-"

"Southwind... If you don't have a miracle play dropping out of your ass like a case of the trots, THEN I DON'T WANNA HEAR SHIT FROM YOU!"

"Yes coach." Southwind answered begrudgingly.

"...I wanna win, but you fucking pansies don't wanna get your hooves dirty. You're too scared to make plays because you don't wanna chip a hoof. Oh my coat will get dirty or maybe I'm too much of a lady to get in the dirt. DID I RAISE A BUNCH OF HOUSEMARES OR DID I RAISE A CHAMPIONSHIP-CALIBER TEAM?"

"Uhh coach... wasn't that a bit... mysogynistic?"

"Not in my locker room, Hotseat. Now you stick to your fucking job and let me do mine, bench warmer."

"SIT YO POLITICALLY INCORRECT ASS DOWN! Coach is tryin' to preach."

The towel boy removes himself from the meeting as he walks out on the meeting. The coach continues his rant as he slams his hoof into the wall, causing a small shockwave that knocked down a few pictures that hung on the wall.

"Now, if you're done being sissies, I expect you to go out there and get me that Quest Trophy. Now what are you going to do, ladies?"

"...Play some hoofball." The collective lot sounded out in a dreary tone.

"That was weak. WHAT ARE Y'ALL HERE TO DO?"

"PLAY SOME HOOFBALL!"

"STILL WEAK! WHAT ARE Y'ALL HERE TO DO!?"

"PLAY SOME HOOFBALL!!!!"

"Damn straight! Now go out there and run them straight. INTO. THE GROUND!"

"YES COACH!!!" The entire team pack up and make their way outside for the game as they find the motivation to stay in the game. Southwind picks up his helmet and pads as the coach calls his name.

"Southwind! Front and center!"

Southwind complies, quickly running towards the coach as he carries his equipment. "Yeah coach?"

The coach closes in on the outside linebacker. His words become as sharp as the hardest steel. "That running back is the source of all their running game. He's finding routes that none of us are there to close up. Now what can you do to stop him?"

"Whatever it takes, coach." Southwind responds swiftly as the coach jabs a hoof into his chest.

"Good. I want you to stick a fork in that run game. I wanna see the home-team crowd cringe."

Southwind took pleasure in the orders that he received. With a sinister smile, he confirms his orders and walks away. As he puts on his pads and helmet, he whispers to himself.

"Whatever it takes, coach. Whatever it takes."


Meanwhile, in the Chevaliers locker room.

"Magnus, don't you ever pull no stupid plays like that ever again."

"Yes coach."

"Good. Gentlecolts, tonight is where we flex our muscles. Tonight is where we stretch our legs. This is our time to take this cup home with us. But that cup can't be ours until we go out there and play the full thirty... Oh wait, we have a new inspirational speaker among us."

Some of the players look around as they try to identify who it was that would be speaking. The other players already had a hint on who that was. But to the entire team's surprise their speaker for the half walked up in front of them. The speaker was small in stature and the icing on the cake was that the speaker was actually in the form of a filly. Clearing her throat, Rarity enunciated her speech.

"Gentlecolts, I come before you not as a filly or the daughter of a player among you. But rather that I come as a voice. I come in place of the thousands of fans screaming out loud their cheers and screams. I come on behalf of those who sit and listen in on the radio, because they couldn't be in attendance. Though they say that they've stopped us once before, doesn't mean that they can stop us again. When they say that they can run us into the ground, we should be able to say that we can drag them kicking and screaming to the endzone. Yes, you did wonderfully and that you've outmatched them in the first half. But now... the game truly begins. This is where we make our stand. We climbed this hill and took our crown. AND LIKE HELL THEY'LL GET IT OFF OF OUR HEADS WITHOUT A FIGHT!"

"Dayum, Filly got spunk!" Jetwings interjects as he feels a surge of energy fill his body.

"Shid' let's make 'em work!" Screenshot calls out to the other players.

"That's my daughter!!!" Magnus yells out to the other players, proud of her speech.

"I REALLY LIKE YELLING!!!" A random player screams out loud.

"NOW GO OUT THERE AND MAKE US PROUD CHEVALIERS!" Rarity screams to the top of her lungs.

As the excited throng of players pack up their equipment to head out to the field once more, a very proud Magnus scoops up his daughter and boops her on the nose as she giggles with exuberance. As they walk out the tunnel, Screenshot's voices penetrates the ears of all the Chevalier players.

"Y'all already kno' what it is! IT'S HOOFBALL BABY! LET'S MAKE A PLAY!!!"


Author's Note

Hoofoff or handoff? It's so conflicting on what to use. I wanna use handoff because it's what I'm used to (and sometimes the ponies say hands despite their lack of knowledge on the subject), but I realize that I really can't because this isn't an anthropomorphic setting. Ugh...

But please feel free to leave a comment below on your thoughts. Those would be kinda nice actually

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