This is my fast stab at a mlp fan fic. I expect it to suck out loud. I don not own mlp, or digi browney, or fluffle puff but I intend to burrow, nay steal if necessary these items for the purposes of this story. Hopefully in all good clean fun. Oh i'm not sure were to put the rating but I think pg-13 seems like a good bet.
I'm also breaking this submissions into chapters. This story is kinda, sorta done, but i have to fix a few more things.
What would you do.
Chapter 1
I started the day, in a human world, in a human house, breathing human air, eating human food, and reading pony tumblers. If I could give you one piece of advice that I learned from this experience, you should skip that last one, maybe I wouldn’t have gotten in this whole mess. I was between clicks fallowing, stalking, (reading) my favorite entries when the screen became undone. Frozen, disjointed.
Now not being a pony fan I refused to say it became discorded. Even if it totally 100 percent fit I’m just not going to do it. Pretty much whatever I did seemed to stretch, and distort the screen. Opening up task manager by hitting ctrl, alt delete to kill fire fox, yes I’m sure your thinking I should have been using Chrome, but hay we all have our bad habits. Trying to end the program trying to reset the computer, manually, clicking on the off button. The pictures became more stretched. It began to look like a one of those coal-lied a-scope things kids have.
Suddenly just like that like that I felt I was falling. My mind felt disjointed. Askew, it’s hard to describe, imagine having an ice cream head ache and having your ears pop at the same time while suffering from an intense claustrophobia. And just like that it stopped the colors that had surrounded me, as my vision calmed, the colors were no longer in my mind but before my eyes.
This was the sunniest, colorful, happy land of nature and wonderment I had ever seen in my life. I’d like to take this moment to express I was not high. I do not recreation ally use or other wise in bide drugs. I had drank two monsters in the same day, one in the morning and one in the afternoon. This wasn’t a normal habit, but I felt my heart. Yep it was going crazy. I was suffering a delusion from a heart attack and or a stroke.
“Excuse me.” I heard from behind. I noticed something strange before I looked back. A hoof was placed to my chest. I couldn’t wiggle my fingers. “I’ll bet you’re a little anxious about what’s going on, but I assure you nothing is wrong and there’s no reason to freak out.” The same voice continued calmly. I hadn’t responded or turned yet. I was still staring at the hoof shaking it as if fingers would pop out.
“Am I drugged?” I finally replied. “
No but that’s not an entirely unique response.” I slowly turned seeing a grey unicorn with purple and pink hair. I snorted. '
“Ah.” I went to raise my arms and I felt something else raise, wings? Ha fancy that. I had wings. I began to stretch them. Up, down, little circles, big circles. It’s not that I’m self absorbed, but these were attached to me. “I have wings.” I must sounded at a complete lose. Big blue wings… I couldn’t see my hair it was to short but my fur was blue. Well that could have been worse.
“My names Digi and welcome to Equistri.” I finally looked back at him.
“I have wings, I’m a horse…” He cut me off.
“well technically you’re a pony.”
“I have four legs and wings and I don’t have hands.” I asserted.
“Your resisting the pony thing aren’t you. Are you not a fan?” Digi continued.
“I’m familiar with the series.” “So your not a fan?” He seemed insistent. “I think there are some very strong moments that could have walked their way into a normal show.”
“Your taking this very well,” He seemed to change the subject. Oh no you don’t I thought, I felt myself becoming comfortable. An argument, ahhhhhhhhhh an argument. A no holds barred, chin for chin, knock down drag out brawl. It would been like I never left my lap top back home.
“I take it you are a fan?” I had actually heard of Digi. I had seen his work. I had seen more of it than I had not as far as U tube was concerned. But I desperately needed to argue and this was no time or place to reply with “Hay man I love your videos!”
He replied to my question about being a fan. “I am indeed but I’ll understand if your not.”
It was like someone stuck me in the chest with a shank. No.. no.. no.. no I wasn’t going to stand for being a blue.. a winged horse.. yes a horse… and sit here and make pleasantries. By God if I couldn’t be in charge of how I looked I was still gonna be a jack ass. But than I got side tracked.
“Okay, why are you, or more importantly why am I here?” I hadn’t asked how I would get back yet. It was possible I fell asleep on my lap top, but I’m not one of those people either.
“Well some people have this misconception they have been drawn into a alternative universe and they need to get home immediately, and I need you to remain calm as that’s not what has happened at all.”
.“Oh, well yeah I’ve watched enough tvs and movies, I kinda was guessing that, this wasn’t really my first pic of places I’d go, but hay what the hell, so what is going on?”
“You, are a projection of yourself back home. That hasn’t stopped, it’s still behaving, and acting as it normally would, this is a ponyfication if you will of who you are.” I shuddered to his explanation “Still not feeling all the pony metaphors? Your swimming up hill my friend.” Digi joked and tried to remain pleasant. I had a quite simmering rage building in me. The only thing that kept me from hitting the roof, was he seemed to give me a look “Oh that’s natural.” That actually pissed me off even more.
“Sooooo if I’m understanding this right I’m stuck here? But if I’m a pony me .“*I talked through my teeth.* “why do I remember all my human memories? '“Oh it’s a full pony projection of you, it only fractures when it’s discorded.” Ah.. I thought. He’s here. I wondered if this was the harbinger of chaos, or the house pet version? “As for why I’m here we all get a job that helps the community. My job is to welcome new comers so they don’t freak out. I mean I have other duties and all.” Well I had wings I guess I could gold brick up in a cloud like rainbow dash, I thought to myself.
“So there’s no major, dire circumstance or reason I’ve been brought here for?”
He chortled “You know I thought the same thing when I showed up… it’s just so funny hearing it now out of someone else. You keep looking like you wanna pony slap me”
“You must be fantastic at poker.” I replied back.
“Well come along I’ll take you into town.” We were standing on a hill top just outside of ponyville. I looked around expecting to see someone else fall from the sky next… but it didn’t happen. What happened next was pretty much what you expected. We went into town, a sea of techno colored ponies flooded the town. It was like a rainbow throw up all over the place. “Welcome to pony ville!” I heard one of those deafening African bee horns behind me. The ones you may have seen at soccer match ups. Digi cringed. I’m one of the few people who likes those things. “Pinkie we talked about how harmful those things are.” I turned and saw everyone’s favorite spaz.
“Ms pie.” I mused. “I felt this place was starting to run low on crazy.” God I had been saving that up sense I got here.
“Pinkee lowered the horn and puffed her cheeks “I’m not crazy the world is crazy.”
And just like that my little adventuring party was plus 1. I suspected rightfully so she was going to drive digi nuts.. and also ignoring her would get her to stay and try harder. Digi this time was the one shooting me pissed off looks as if to say “You fucker!” Ah I was finally homes brothers and sisters. She hung on him with the death grip hug
“Your going to have to get under the chin if you want that to be affective he can still breath.” I advised. He gurgled as pinkee tried to crush his clavicle bone.
“I’m going to kill you” He wheezed and I heard someone inject themselves into our conversation.
“Digi, Temper, temper.” A brown wingless less pony with an hour glass symbol (yes I know what kind of mark it is… come to think of it I hadn’t checked for mine yet)
“Dr hooves?” I asked. He smiled and stood back.
“Fan?”
“I’m familiar “ I responded. Digi was in the back ground
“Help can’t breath.” He was turning bluer than I was by now. Naturally I blocked the drs view, by stepping in the way. “
Oh I’ve seen the fan episodes with you and derpy? Ditzie?”
“Assistant will do fine.” Digis eyes x ed
“Oh My Celestia noooo!” Pinkee screamed. Derpy was right behind the good Dr. Pinkee grabbed her and started shaking “DERPY GET THE SHOCK PADS!” “Right away miss Pie!” Naturally I kept the conversation going. All the while enjoying the train wreck before my eyes.
“I just found the humor so above the par of the regular show.” I wasn’t lying talking about the Dr Hooves and Assistant series. There was no singing. A pony sporting a French barrette had trotted by as his jaw dropped.
“PInkee NO! NOT 1000 thousand!” “BZZZZZZZZZZZT” the power from half the block went out as Digi leached back to life as pinkee damn near melted the pads.. The Dr finally looked back
“Oh hi Curious. Digi would stop playing with the girls and do your damn job, some of us are trying to look professional.”
“I blame the schools.” I said trying to throw gas on the flame. Oh what a delicious death glare. Best part is I didn’t even have to do anything. Digi glared me down as I trotted up. “You know what would be perfect? If you went “Yourrrrrrrrrrrr despicable” And then he started to laugh. His friend Curious helped him up before going on his way. “Will I be staying with ms pie?”
“HELL NO!” He coughed trying to regain his calm. PInkee awed all unloved. “Sides most people can’t take her non stop for a whole week. I’m going to drop you off with the dr for now maybe he can find something for you to do.”
I saw a curious sight of the corner of my eyes. A red mained stallion peeking
from around a corner wearing a skeletal mask. Ever hear that song “One of these things is not like the other, one of these things does not belong.” “Say Digi before you go. You said a part of yourself comes over, is it ever more than just one part?” He seemed confused as if it had never been asked. Or it had never come up. I knew that mask. I knew that visage that was a fire waiting to be started. “Ah it’s nothing thanks for the tour around town.” I had resented the place sense I got here. Something dark from back home had fallowed me. Three shades darker than nightfall. The kinda darkness that would rend a capable world apart. It was loose, unchecked, unnoticed here. Imagine being the only person to know a 10 car pileup was about to happen.