In the Company of Myself... And Ponies

by GallantNavy

Rating: mature
Tags: Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Alternate Universe, Human, Doctor Whooves, Main 6, Original Character, Queen Chrysalis, Derpy Hooves, Sex
Length: 3077

We fight. We die. We wake up again someplace new and We fight again. Doesn't matter if We win, that's just what We do. It's Our job, and We do it well.

My job is bloody. My job is dangerous. My job requires that I die, frequently, violently, and horribly.

And I love it.

My name is Comm, and I'm a Wanderer. A Fighter. A Visionary and a Leader. But above all else, I'm a Martyr.

I give my life up time and time again to protect those who need protection, to change their world for the better and to ensure the victory of their cause. Sometimes I live to see the enemy finally fall, sometimes I don't. That part doesn't really matter to me, to be honest. Sure, it's gratifying, but so long as I die having done some good I'll smile when I wake back up in Limbo and look back my last run fondly until I find myself another hole in the fabric of unreality so I can do it all over again.

Again, I love my job... But my partners make it even better.

See, there's three of us crammed in this one brain, so even the endless silence and solitude of Limbo isn't silent and depressing. Neat, right?

Yeah, you probably think I'm crazy right now, being so relaxed about having multiple personalities in one mind but believe it or not, we're actually relying on each other to keep all three of us sane. I mean, who else could we possibly talk about this stuff with without them looking at us fu-

Hold the phone.

Who the hell are you, and how'd you get in our head?

A/N: Best to read this thing in the "Dark" color setting as different colors are used to denote who's thinking what in the guy's brain.

Published 2013-10-03 22:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-10-03 22:00:01 UTC

Prologue

Well that was fun, I remark as I float backwards through the endless void of space, watching that hellhole of a space-station implode and explode all at the same time with a grin on my face. Not that there's anyone around to see it, what with me drifting alone out here.

Undoubtedly so, One of my partners agree in his trademark refined voice, also sporting a wide grin to match my own.

Alright, so maybe I'm not quite alone.

Agreed, My other partner replies, not quite grinning but still smiling all the same, That was our first time fighting the undead, wasn't it?

No no, I distinctly remember Comm attempting to use a chainsaw to rip through some flesh eaters at least once. It was a couple Cycles back, I think.

Don't remind me, I groan at the thought, I don't know what made me think that it'd be a good idea to try that...

Oh, I remember that now, Partner-Number-Two chuckles, How many times did the thing get stuck before he decided to leave it and use something that actually worked?

Four, the first one answers with a shit eating grin, Why he kept on trying that many times is beyond me, however.

Hey, we've all had blunders, guys. Remember that time with the exploding SMG?

How was I supposed to know Tediore weapons actuallywent off like that instead of properly reloading?

The weapon cards say they explode like grenades when reloaded, Reggie.

Well I thought it it was something similar to what that girl with the red hair did whenever she reloaded. You can't blame me for thinking that, Reginald, better known as 'Reggie' by his friends, eplains Besides, either of you could have corrected me at any point.

And why would we do that? I reply with my own shit eating grin, relinquishing my hold on our body so we all can hold a proper face-to-face conversation.

So I did not nearly blow us all up, for starters, Reggie frowns slightly, If it weren't for the shield we would have gone back to Limbo a heck of a lot sooner.

Actually, Reggie, the only way that thing would've been able to down us at the time was if you hit the reload button when it had a full clip. Tediore explosions are weak without bullets still in the magazine.

And you know this how, Lute?

Easy, I reply, stepping in on Ludwig's behalf, You remember how much Lute loved browsing the ECHOnet in his spare time. Heck, even I was sure to at least read up on the different weapon types that Cycle. Why didn't you?

Because it is more fun to find that kind of stuff out firsthand, is it not? Remember that Plasma Caster?

Everybody goes silent as we go into nostalgic flashbacks involving using that blessed gun to melt through those goddamned robots. Afterwords the silence lapses longer as we begin to ponder things on our own, neglecting our ability to share our immediate thoughts with one another in favor of some nice private thinkings. Meanwhile, our body just continues to drift away from the wreckage of the doomed station.

Sooooo, I begin a few minutes later when I finally get done contemplating just how much I despize enemies that blow up when they get too close to you, especially the ones that sneak up on you silently, How is it we're not dead again yet? Shouldn't we have suffocated by now or something?

Lute added some re-breather upgrades to the suit a couple days ago.

Oh... Wait, why? It's not like we spent much time out in the vacuum to begin with, Lute.

Eh, I was bored, Ludwig admits with a shrug, And I figured something more complicated like a re-breather would take longer. Still had an hour or so to burn afterward before the others finally woke up and we could get moving again. You don't remember because it was your turn to rest.

Alright then, I concede with a shrug of my own, knowing full and well that plenty of things could happen while one of us was resting. Was one of the perks of having three consciousnesses shoved into one body, actually: Stuff can still get done by one of the others when you needed to sleep. Still have no idea how our body gets by without it actually getting any real sleep itself, though... Maybe Limbo altered its needs or something, but who really knows? It's not like that really matters, anyway, its just the way we've always been.

Silence falls upon us as we start thinking about different things once again. This is common for us, generally leaving each other alone after completing our objective for the life. Gives us plenty of time to think up different things to talk about when we're wandering Limbo, break up the emptiness of the place and whatnot.

Well, aren't you the interesting find?

I blink. That was a fourth voice. At least I think it was...

Guys..?

Yeah, I heard it too...

As did I. Were either of you expecting guests?

Reggie, I deadpan at my top-hat toting friend, We're currently mental projections of multiple personalities floating around in some broken mind. We don't get guests.

Then explain the mismatched gentlemen over there, Reggie replies calmly, pointing at the... Thing? Yeah, the thing that's currently floating around the control-panel, eyeing its surroundings with interest.

Huh... Well that's new.

I could say the same thing about you three, The creature responds, not looking up from his inspection of the immersion matrix. What's an immersion matrix? Think a device that you lay down on that jabs a fuckton of needles into you so you can enter some kind of virtual reality. Thats basically what the immersion matrix is, except it acts as a bridge from our shared Mindscape to realtiy.

Mindscape? You're telling me you don't know what a Mindscape is?

You need to get out more.

That so..? Lute asks, approaching the thing.

Draconequus, It corrects, glancing up at me then returning to the matrix, Also I'm a he, not an it. Get it right.

Eh... Come again?

I can read your narration.

My what?

You don't know about that? It, or he rather, sighs as he stands up. Shame, thought I had found another.

Another what? Lute asks from beside the creature, having snuck up on him when his attention was on the machine before him.

One, he didn't sneak up on me, The creature corrects, looking at me again. I honestly have no idea why, though. Two, Draconequus. Three, you don't need to know, and Four, I've a proposition for you boys.

The meaning of most of this goes over my head, but not Reggie's apparently.

One, yes he did. Two, good to finally meet one. Three, obviously and Four, we accept.

Both Lute and I stare at our friend as if he had grown a second head. Which he had, if you count the Draconequus' head as he pressed it to Reggie's, the guy's long snake-like body and mismatched arms having wrapped around the man in a hug.

I knew someone in here would understand! he grins, looking positively giddy, Oh this'll be so much fun~

Eh...

What exactly did you just have us agree to, Reggie?

The man merely grins at us, I have no idea.

1 - Arrival

Things weren't going well in Canterlot.

Sure, the sky was clear and the weather was great and stuff, the pegasi were sure to put out their very best today. It was practically a requirement with the big wedding and all. Problem was, turns out there was some huge invasion scheme that actually came to fruition: The city was on the verge of being sacked.

Again, things weren't going well in Canterlot.

And the Doctor (or Time Turner, as his alias was to the common pony) didn't have an elaborate plan to fix things this time. Not that he was worried. The Doctor never really got worried, so long as he had some form of idea that could be constituted as a plan by some stretch of the imagination (which he did by the by) then he never really had a reason to get worried. His companion, on the other hoof-

"OhmygoshDoctorlookout!"

-was incredibly worried. Not that they couldn't save the day, mind you; the bubbly mare had absolute faith in her friend. No, she was more worried that they wouldn't save the day. Not by choice, of course, it was just that these rude changelings kept on crashing into the ground directly in front of them! Repeatedly, no less! They'd run for maybe half a block -SPLAT!- sudden changeling in either her or the Doctor's face. Every single block! It was so predictable that the Doc was contemplating stopping halfway down the next street, turning around, and gearing up for a massive buck to the next bugger's face! Maybe that'll learn them to stop blocking their path, eh?

Probably not, but still: at least then Ditzy would know that he knew one was coming with out looking up every five seconds at the swarm. Appropriately named, the mare was, but like the rest of the Doctor's companions, she could be brilliant when she needed to be, which is why he picked her.

Also for her delightfully cute golden walleyes, but that's beside the point.

The point was that she was about to have one of those moments. Just when the next changeling predictably decided to swoop down and try to spell doom for the duo, Miss Ditzy Doo decided that she'd had enough of this running from the pack of changelings chasing them and getting "surprised" by dive-bombing ones. So she stopped running and started flying, just as most pegasi would have done by now. By leaping to the air and flapping her (surprisingly powerful) wings, she snatched the Doctor off the ground when he stopped to allow his next challenger to crash into the cobblestone road.

"Brilliant, Ditzy!" Her timepony companion claims rather cheerily as the two pull ahead of the mess of changelings that had been chasing them. Internally he was kicking himself for forgetting yet again that Miss Doo was more than capable of carrying them both to safety for what must have been the hundredth time, but of course he didn't let that show, not in a time of crisis. "Now, get us to that gatehouse!"

Right, I suppose I forgot to fill you in on their destination, haven't I?

Well, the two of them were attempting to get to a spatial-temporal anomaly that the Doc had been meaning to investigate for a while now, but always found himself hopelessly distracted by one thing or another every time it momentarily entered the forefront of his thoughts. Hey, big 'ol city getting ready for a big 'ol wedding has a lot going on in it, alright? Besides, the thing could barely be picked up by the TARDIS' sensors a day ago, whereas the lovely blue box had correctly predicted quite a large, important happening at the time of the wedding, so obviously that was the first thing to investigate. Especially considering the anomaly was on about as far away from Canterlot Castle as it could be, right near the entrance of the city and whatnot.

Now, however, it was probably their only shot at taking the city back. At least that was what the Doctor's gut was telling him, and if you couldn't trust your own gut then what does that tell you about the people you surround yourself with, mm?

Still, the flight over wasn't sunshine and rainbows: Ponies were probably dying down on the streets, and right now there was nothing the two could do to stop it. Families were probably being ripped asunder, disguised changelings taking the places of their victims... Foals ripped from their mothers, fathers fighting head and hoof to protect their loved on-

"Enough of that, Doctor," The chestnut-coated stallion shook his head in an attempt to free his mind from such thoughts. "Morn the lost later, save who you can now," He muttered.

Due to her close proximity, Ditzy was more than able to hear her friend's murmurings and bit her lip. She knew how he got whenever they couldn't save somepony, and that always made her worry for him. Such a kindhearted stallion he was, and that's part of the reason she agreed to travel with him in the first place. She just hoped that he'd be able to cope once everything was said and d-

"Eep!"

The sudden presence of several changelings around her causes Ditzy's attention to be drawn back to reality. Seems the bugs have some fast fliers in their ranks as well. Time to break out some more complicated maneuvers then, eh?

Wait.

She doesn't know any complicated maneuvers.

Time to improvise!

+=====+

| (.;.) |

| )'( |

| (.:.) |

+=====+

Fifteen minutes and one high-speed mid-air chase later, the duo touchdown atop the gatehouse.

"That was brilliant Ditzy!" Doctor crowed, grinning ear to ear despite the fact his knees were weak from the various tricks his companion pulled to get them away. Also, mild fear for his life, but he'd never admit to that, especially when she'd just saved their skins. "Absolutely brilliant! Weaving through the rooftops like that, whizzing through those open windows, whirling around that steeple, marvelous! I didn't know you had that in you!"

"N-neither did I," The walleyed mare admitted panting heavily, "I-I just... I-I dunno, just went w-with my gut! Whew..." She sat on the floor, glad that the ordeal was over. "S-so, what was it that... That we need to get here?"

"Weeeeeell.." The Doctor rubbed the back of his neck, "I'm not too sure actually, but I know for a fact that it's here. On the ground floor actually."

"What... What do you mean?" Ditzy blinked tiredly as she picked herself back up. "Does... It have anything to do with that blip on the map you kept ignoring?"

"I wasn't ignoring it, I was merely saving it for later," He clarified in a tone that screams 'nope, totally was ignoring it' as he make for the door to head inside the gatehouse, "Whatever it is, I'm sure I'll know it when I see it, and I'm sure I'll think up a way to use it to stop the invasion. That's how these things tend to work, right?"

Ditzy nods, sighing a little. Despite her ultimate faith in him, she knew more than half of his plans are pulled out of his rear at the last possible second. Silly to think different of him after traveling with him for this long, eh? Still, he was brilliant, and they both knew it. Best just not question how his brilliance works and go with it.

As the two made their way downstairs, they noticed a change in the air... Well, Doctor did anyway, being more in-tune with the timestream and all that than his feathered friend. Suffice to say it felt weird here, and not in a way the Doctor was fond of.

"Something's off..." He observed, growing more tense as they descended, "Something... Something bigger's going on here than the Old Girl picked up earlier.. It almost feels like.. No, it couldn't be... Could it?"

Before Ditzy could question just what "it" was, the sound of something heavy and metal crashing into the stone walls of the building rings out below them, (It's a form of BANG, in case you were wondering) causing the two to jump.

"It is!" Doctor's eyes widen in realization before he shoots off down the stairs, going so fast that he's liable to trip. "C'mon, Ditzy!"

Well, whatever it was, it's obviously important, and probably good considering his excited tone. Bearing this in mind, Ditzy hurried to catch up with him.

Then again, Doctor's been wrong before.

-|--< ( - ) >--|-

Good God, the pain!

Aw, man up old chap; It can not be near as bad as getting an arm cut off, after all.

Oh yeah, well lets see how you like it!

Hey, what are y- HOLY HELL! THE PAIN!

Smirking a little, I reassume control, taking the burden of being launched ass-first out a wormhole into a solid wall off his metaphorical shoulders. We're seriously lucky we didn't break our tailbone given the force that we hit the thing with, actually, so there's a silver lining to this bloody cloud of agony I currently have to deal with.

And that's why you never tell the guy in control to man up, Reggie.

Piss off...

Chuckling a little in spite of the pain in our rear, I manage to roll us over so I can study the ceiling while waiting for our body to want to move again.

So, what's the deal, draco dude? Said there was work over here?

Draconequus. How many times am I going to have to tell you this before you listen?

Oh, he heard you the first time. Comm just likes nicknaming people.

'Sides, you won't tell us your real name we kinda have to call you something. 'Draco' will have to do for now, eh?

I suppose so...

I snap my fingers, a sudden spurt of inspiration spreading a smile across my face.

Actually, no, screw Draco-

Beg pardon?

Poor wording, sorry. What I mean is, why go with something as generic as "Draco?" Not very creative, eh? No, you look like you'd make a better "Malfoy" than a "Draco" anyway.

Did you seriously just make a Harry Potter reference when picking my nickname?

AWhat?

You just- nevermind. He gives the three of us an odd look, Is syncing like that normal for you boys?

We look to each other and shrug collectively before turning our attention back to Malfoy.

It happens from time to time.

Not often enough that we worry, though. It is probably just a quirk of our minds being in such proximity to one another.

I see.... Fascinating...

More or less.

Anyway, we're probably good to move again, either of you want to take a spin?

Nah.

I am still tired from that last encounter, to be honest.

Alright then, I shrug and turn my attention back to the world outside our brain, only to see something staring my faceplate directly in the face. Something I don't recognize.

So I headbutt it.