Aegis goes to the Rainbow Factory

by ONWARD_Conwardicus

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy
Length: 1403

As a twenty year old earth pony still living with his mother is about to learn, what you don't know can't hurt you.

Aegis is one of those protected children. Living in a box, given non-toxic crayons, and getting care from his mother. Twenty years later, he leaves his box for the first time to go to the Rainbow Factory. He likes it there enough. Guard rails so you don't fall, a fully operated sauna, and he gets to teach the workers there a lot about what he learned from Mom.

They keep complaining about broken knives as well. They try to show me how to use a knife, and then it breaks. He just wants to find a bottle of hand sanitizer.

Published 2013-09-10 22:00:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-09-10 22:00:02 UTC

In the Van

“My name is Aegis. I am twenty years old, and I like bubbles. My mom gives me bubbles on days I am being a good boy, and don’t complain or sneeze or touch germs. I live in my box. My box is everything I know. It has everything I need, from fifty piece puzzles to Daring Do Coloring books to hand sanitizer. And today is the first day that I get to leave my box!

I don’t have a choice actually. That’s what mom said. I love my mom with all my heart, and I know she loves me back. She got me bubbles last week to prove it. I still don’t know where I’m going, but mom said she will be following me just a few steps behind. I imagine it like her helping me walk. Don’t tell her I’m using my imagination, okay?

I heard about leaving my box about three days ago. I was reading the little engine that could and was just about to see if he made it over the hill when my mom appeared outside my box when she wasn’t supposed to. I had a clock set to every time she would come and give me a smile, a hug, and a tummy rub if I ate all the celery. But she appeared without celery or any other food this time, and my clock didn’t go off, so I was confused.

Mom was not smiling for some reason. It was sort of like an eyedropper was dropping a lot of water out of her eyes, but I didn't see one in her hand. I hope she didn't need eyedrops like I did seven years ago. They stung a little. At least they kept the eye lice away.

Mom started to talk, but it sounded like she had swallowed one of my rubber toys, because her voice was squeaky. I couldn't tell what she said, even though I payed attention to everything she did. All I could make out were three words I don’t know and two I do. The words I don’t know were ‘debt’, ‘sell’, and ‘bills’. I thought it was duck bills but mom said it was different than that. The words I did know were ‘rainbow’ and ‘happy’. Except she moved her eyes to the ceiling when she said happy, so I don’t think she knew what she was saying.

The next day Mom came in the usual time, with my celery and a bottle of purple juice. It wasn't in the usual juice box. It came in what mom said was a vial. She said it was better than my other juice that she had given me before, because pear juice had too much sugar. She told me to eat my celery one last time and then drink the juice. I don’t know what she meant by last time, but I always ate all my celery all the times before. As I picked up the vial of juice i noticed there was somepony’s face on it, except his tongue was hanging out and his eyes were big X’s. I knew why his tongue was hanging out when I drank the thing in one gulp. It was like medicine and tasted horrible.

Mom began with the invisible eyedropper right away, saying sorry and how she felt horrible for doing this to me. She didn't want to see me a rainbow, or something like that. I didn't understand her though, because the juice was gone and I was okay. The eyedropper stayed there for about an hour, until she stood up and glared like I had germs on me. I looked all over myself and I couldn't find a single germ. I asked her what was wrong, and she just shook her head. She asked to see the vial and I showed it was completely empty, not a drop left. I asked not to have any more juice like that though, only if they were out of pear juice. Mom blinked a few times before leaving. After the clock rang a second time, she came back for lunch and only gave me the juice this time, with the vial filled to the top and not halfway. I listen to my mom though and drank it all. She stayed outside my box again for about two hours, as if waiting for me to say something. She said she was waiting for me to kick the bucket, but I reminded her she doesn't let me kick or use buckets.

She left after that, and didn't show for dinner. The next morning I wasn't hungry but I woke up to see mom coming into my box! She usually gives me things through the tube or uses the gloves on the outside. The last time she came in is when I had split my hoof from kicking my bed in my sleep. She had a shiny long pointy thing, and it looked like a slice of carrot that was silver and very sharp on the side. Mom saw me awake and shook a little, nearly dropping the object. She said she didn't want to see me in pain and this was the best way for me to go, not with the bad ponies who she owed, or something. I just laid in my bed and stared, because I was still yawning and doing my morning stretches.

Mom trotted over to me with the shiny thing in her hand. I had a flashback then of her using that to cut celery, and it was a knife. I asked mom where the celery was and she didn't answer. She just raised the knife above her head and looked at the clock. I don’t know how she looked at it with her eyes closed though. The knife was above my head, and it looked really shiny in the white light of my lamp.

The knife suddenly came down on my head. I honestly don’t know what I expected, but I heard the sound of metal squeaking like a rusty gate. I don’t know what it was, but it hurt my ears and I covered them with my hooves. My mom opened her eye a bit and I saw her orange iris shake. Then she opened them all the way, which is not okay because germs could fly in there. She stared at me, then looked at what I think was the knife. It was bent to the side. Not all of it really, just a part that was about the outline of my forehead.

Mom walked over to me again, with her eyes still open and probably a ton of germs getting in there. She held the knife out to the side, then brought the sharp part against my shoulder. It looked like it would've hurt, but I laughed a little as the knife tickled my shoulder. Something also fell on the ground. I looked down on my rug and there was the top of the knife. Mom was still holding the lower part. I still wonder if she had a knife to cut the other knife and cause that to happen.

Mom walked out of my box then fell on the floor. She must have been really tired, because she didn't get up again until there was a knock somewhere beyond my box. Mom got up with a messy mane, something she never does. She walked out of my sight and came right back, with two other ponies who just walked in and grabbed me. They didn't have gloves or anything! They told me I was going somewhere called the Rainbow Factory. I didn't know what a factory was, but I knew I loved rainbows! And that’s how I am here, right now, in a new dark box, looking for the tube they give me celery in. No tube so far, but they said it would be only an hour before I got there.

So what are you doing here?” The neon orange earth pony asked the mare next to him. The mare didn’t say anything, only scooting over on her part of the bench towards a stallion who had an invisible eye dropper. Aegis had never been around so many ponies at once. He didn’t know what to think. They all thought he was a germ as well, by the way they were looking at him.