Story time with Coleyon5

by Chad

Rating: mature
Tags: Comedy, Adventure, Random, Alternate Universe, Human
Length: 996

This story will not make sence what so ever. It is being written to make you laugh and go "HAHAHA!!! Oh man, what is with this guy!" So now, enjoy.

If you've read my stories before, then you'll know that at the end of some chapters I do this thing were I talk to twilight and act like I'm her room mate or some thing. I'm here to tell you that this is how I got there and is 100% TRUE!!! The story will make you laugh, it will make you say . "Dang this is funny!" And it also includes my story!
In the story Chrysalis and Discord team up to take over Equestria and Earth! But while they do this one young man will wake up from his afternoon nap and beat the evil army to nothing! But he can't do it alone… well he can but that wouldn't be any fun so the main 6 will help him on this fine journey to stop the bad guys. They will use friendship. They will use grenades. Or better yet… FRIENDSHIP GRENADES!!!

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-09-15 06:49:24 UTC

I START HOW I WANT!!!!!

      Me: Oh, hello there. I didn't see you at first. *smiles while sipping tea from my cup*

       Twi: Yes you did. You knew they were there when they got here. *rolls eyes* and when did you buy that suit?

      Me: Doesn't matter! let's get started baby!!!

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       A long long time ago, about two weeks, something bad ended. But we're going to go back further so you can read what happened. Before Discord was turned into a good guy and Twilight became a princess, Chrysalis was planning on what to do to Equestria next. "No, no, no NO NO NO!!!!!" She yelled as she ran out of ideas. "All those ideas wouldn't work! Those Elements of harmony will ruin my plans no matter what!!!"

      It had been one week since she had attacked Canterlot and failed horribly. "How did I lose when the Elements weren't even with their users!"

      "Maybe if you didn't just let them do whatever they want instead of sitting there with your back turned." Said a voice that Chrysalis never thought she would hear.

       "W-what? How did you?" Chrysalis said as Discord appeared In front of her as a hamster.

         "When you and your army attacked Canterlot, it was enough chaos to set me free!" He said as he ran around in circles making Chrysalis face hoof.

      "Could you not be a hamster for this?" She asked.

       Discord promptly turned into a guinea pig then smirked at Chrysalis as she face hoofed again.

       "Ok then, why are you here? I figured that you were the type that likes to do bad things," Says Chrysalis stopping to clear her throat. "All the time."

        "I did some crazy things to some animals just to be safe. I DON'T want to be turned into stone again." Discord said but then remembered why he came there. "But, I want to turn Equestria into the most chaotic place in the world, and I also know you want to take over someplace."

      "I want Equestria and so do you. If you want to partner up it won't work out." Chrysalis said then began to get a glare on her face. "In fact we should be enemies."

    "Now, now queen. I have an idea where we both win." Discord said as he began to tell her of a place where technology is very futuristic. A place where cities are large. A place full of new things that nether of them had even seen. "A place full of two legged creatures called humans that had weird things they called 'hands' on the ends of their forelegs or 'arms'.

     "Wait. Are you saying you want me to help you take it over?" Chrysalis asked Discord.

      "No, no, no. You see, Chrysalis, They have the most dangerous weapons known to the universe. And it would be easier to take over Equestria with a brain washed army of soldiers who poses this... 'guns' as they say. And once Equstria is mine, You will have, not a country, but a WORLD to rule!!!" Discord said as he turned into a US soldier to show Chrysalis what they looked like.

     Chrysalis then realized the only thing that stood in the way. "Discord?"

      "Yes?" Discord said as he turned back into his normal form.

        "How do we defeat them?" She asked the god of chaos.

      "Aw, well that's the best part, Chrysalis." Discord leaned in very, very close until he was a millimeter away from her face with a big evil smile on his face. "They don't have magic, nor can they use it."

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                                                   Almost eight hours later...

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       Down in the small town of Paradise, Oklahoma (not a real town) at the high school, there was a young man named Cole but when he was little his dad gave him the nickname Coleyon. " *Snore* *snore* Huh what?" He said as he woke up in his desk. The lights were off even in the hallway. "Where is everybody?" Coleyon said as he got out of his desk and stood up. "Awwwwwww yeah, SCHOOS OUT BABY!!!" He said as he ran out the door of the classroom and then ran down the hall. "When I get home, I'm gonna play some Team Fortress 2!!!"

      He was a very strange seventeen year old, but luckily he didn't give a shit about what people thought of him.

He wore a gray fedora, black short-sleeve shirt with a white long-sleeved button up shirt that had the first top two buttons unbuttoned, a pitch-black leather jacket that was unzipped completely, fingerless gloves, blue jeans, big black boots, and a pair of dark sun-glasses.

    He was white, had messy dark brown hair, had muscle but not the kind of muscle that let you pick up 600 pounds, more of a tough guy that wasn't too tough, and Brown eyes.

     "FREEZE!!!" Screamed a police man as he jumped out from the boys bathroom and aimed at Coleyon.

      "Fuck da police!" Yelled Coleyon as he jumped into the air and kicked the gun out of the cop's hands.

       The police man fell on the ground holding his right hand which Coleyon had kicked. The police man looked up at Coleyon and said. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry... It's too late for me... th-they'll get you a-and kill you... run... and h-hide."

      "Who?" Coleyon said as the police man began to close his eyes. "PO-PO!!! NO!!! You tell me who da fuck made you go CRAZY COP!!!!!" But it was too late, the police man had stopped breathing. "Well, that's just fan-fucking-tastic!"

     Coleyon looked over at the gun and walked over to it. "Ooooooo! That's mine now." He said as he picked it up and cocked it. "It's time to kick all those rich guy's asses!" He yelled as he ran down the hallway again, unaware of what had happened while he was asleep.