Author's Note
Now with dramatic reading by the wonderful and talented ObabScribbler!
Clicky.
Organized Chaos
“Hoofwrasslin’!” Applejack’s voice rang out from the fitting room, causing Rarity to miss her mark and ruin a perfectly good dress pattern.
“Racing!” Dash’s voice retorted. Rarity groaned; they were at it again.
“Applebuckin’!” Applejack countered.
“Rarity!” They both shouted, making the fashionista wince.
She laid the materials down and walked into the room in a huff, regarding the two of them cooly.
Both of them had huge grins on their faces as she walked in, which only made this intrusion worse. “How is it I am the least high maintenance in this relationship?” She looked back and forth between the expectant faces. “What is it this time?”
Applejack at least had the common courtesy to look abashed at her bad behavior, even if it did not stop her from continuing to behave badly. “Aw, I’m real sorry, Sug. It’s just Miss ‘Cock of the Walk’ over here is dead set on coming up with another Iron Pony challenge.”
Rainbow nodded her head vigorously. “It needs to be something that won’t give one of us an unfair advantage. Well, I mean, besides what we can’t avoid.” She looked into the nearest mirror, of which there were several to choose from, and flexed. “You can tie down the wings, but you can’t stop the awesome!”
Rarity grimaced at the display, shaking her head at the two of them. “How about you both see who can remain silent the longest so I can get some work done? I mean, really, darlings. I absolutely love it when you come by for more than just ‘the usual’—” Faint blushes adorned both of her marefriends at the mention of that “—but this is a really busy time for me! Do you think you can perhaps take this elsewhere?”
Thoroughly chastised, they both hung their heads.
“C’mon, Dash, let’s let the lady get back to work. I got some chores to do myself, and if I read the schedule right, somepony is supposed to have the skies cleared today.”
Rainbow shook her head in disgust. “Fine! I keep forgetting what a couple of sticks in the mud you two can be. ‘I have to work! Rainbow, you need to stop bothering me,’” she said, badly mimicking the unicorn. “I just wanted to have some fun!”
Rarity stomped a hoof down. “And this is meant to be fun? You’re both absolutely wonderful, but I can only take so much of watching you two compare talents to see whose is better! You want a challenge? How about you come by later and see which of you can get me to sing a high note on cue?” She fluttered her eyes at them, trying to derail another round of ‘who is the better pony.’
Once again they both fell silent, Applejack looking steadily at the floor and Rainbow having to restrain her wings from flaring out. Rarity breathed a sigh of relief; they would have a lot of pent-up energy from this frustration they both were feeling, and she intended to capitalize on it. Tonight promised to be one memorable ride for the fashionista.
“Hey! This is one of those... make-me-be-quiet-with-promises-of-sexytimes things, isn’t it?”
Applejack cuffed Rainbow angrily on the foreleg. “It’s called a ‘distraction’, Rainbow. And I suggest you hush up, cause it’s a danged good one!”
Rainbow’s expression turned cloudy, and she stomped her hooves. “But I wanted to blow off some steam! I mean, yeah, sex is good.” She backpedaled quickly when Rarity shot her a dark look. “Really, really good, but there’s supposed to be more to this ‘relationship’ thing than really awesome sex and snuggling!”
Rarity’s expression softened, and she trotted up to the two of them, nuzzling affectionately against their cheeks. “My stars, you are absolutely right! I have been neglecting my loves, haven’t I? Here I am burying myself in work and my two darlings have come because they miss me?” The pegasus and the earth pony looked away, not wanting to acknowledge the sentiment, but notably not denying it. “Well, this simply won’t do! I’m taking you two out tonight. Anywhere you would like!”
Her marefriends glanced at each other, then back to her, mischief clear in their eyes.
“Anywhere, huh?” Applejack smiled rakishly, making Rarity begin to regret her offer.
“‘The Bucking Bronco’?! Girls, are you sure this is the right place? This seems a bit... rustic,” Rarity said, trying to keep her distaste from being quite so evident.
“Eeyup, this is the place. Dashie and I used to come here back before—” The farmer winced, cutting herself off.
“—before you allowed me to share in what you have?” Rarity finished. “Oh my darlings, you wanted to share a bit more of yourselves?” Rarity squealed happily. “You two are so wonderful to me! Well then, let us see what we shall see, my loves.”
As expected, the interior was not terribly focused on aesthetics. There were a number of rough-hewn tables and stools, what looked to be a billiards table, and a curious contraption in the middle of the back wall. It seemed to be a saddle affixed to some sort of machine. Further survey revealed the one thing Rarity could readily recognize the function of: the bar. She strode up to it with determination and ordered most of it.
The bartender nodded politely. He had seen this type before. She didn’t want to be here but didn’t want to admit it, so she was trying to impair her brain to the point where she was basically gone anyway. “How about I make you a nice frozen daiquiri to start with? You can decide what else you’d like after that.”
Rarity nodded brusquely, making note to tip the stallion generously. There was something to be said for a male of his profession who could discern between what a pony said and their actual intent. “Fine, but with a triple shot, if you don’t mind. I am here to have ‘fun’ and I don’t intend to disappoint.”
“You got it!”
She turned around and smiled beatifically at her marefriends, who had co-opted the billiards table and appeared to be using it to play common pool. “So, are we having fun?”
Applejack nodded, eyeing a particularly difficult shot and crowing triumphantly when she made it. Rarity smiled indulgently, cheering each of them on, and expressing sympathy for scratches or missed shots. Eventually, Applejack proved the victor, which lead once more to the two of them bantering back and forth about what to do next.
Due to the limited selection of activities in such locations, the dartboard was chosen. And here Rainbow proved herself. Applejack acquitted herself admirably, of course, but as skilled as she was with her tail, Rainbow was just a better pony for it. Her wings were more adept for flinging the darts and she simply had a better eye for how a flying object would land. It was closer than the pool game, but greater dexterity won out.
Rarity had grown immensely bored by then. Had she wished, she could have beaten either of them without problem, but that was hardly the point. Telekinesis was as precise as the mind behind it, and hers was honed from years of practice. All she would have done was take all the fun out of it for them.
They finally came back to the table, and Rarity hoped that would mark an end to the competition for the night. She dearly loved the two of them, but it was so trying to always play the cheerleader from the sidelines. Granted, the flush of victory they felt generally lead to interesting and exciting things later, but it would be nice if they could just spend an evening drinking and laughing together for once.
The night wore on and the chat she had been waiting for was well and truly begun; Rainbow puffing up her chest bragging about her latest and greatest stunts, Applejack sharing her day’s trials with the cattle, Rarity telling them both about the horrid customer who had demanded she put everything else on hold for her daughter’s cute-ceneta party dress. Jokes were shared and sloppy kisses exchanged. At last, a good time was being had by all of them.
That all ended the moment Rainbow turned quiet, looking at the strange contraption at the far wall. “I’m gonna ride it tonight,” she declared with a look of determination and a slight sway in her body.
Applejack looked up in disapproval. “I keep telling ya, you’re gonna get hurt again. Danged thing threw you over the bar last time.”
“Don’t care. I got it this time. Ten seconds, just watch.” Rainbow stood up and lurched over to the contraption, climbing into the saddle. “I need one of you to turn it on!”
“‘Ten seconds’ she says... I’ll give you five before your fool plot is flung against the wall again...” This did not stop Applejack from getting up and going to the controls of the machine, Rarity noted with displeasure.
Applejack turned the contraption on, and it began to buck and turn, apparently in emulation of the bulls that the farmer herself rode during her rodeos. It gradually picked up speed, becoming more and more difficult to hang onto. Dash clung desperately, but despite her assurances, lost her grip at the five second mark, which seemed for the best, as the machine’s violent movements were only getting faster as it operated.
Rainbow, meanwhile, was sailing through the air in exactly the way no pegasus enjoyed: completely out of her control and unable to get her wings out in time to do anything about it. She shut her eyes tightly and waited for the sickening crunch of her body against the unforgiving wood of the floor. After several seconds she dared open her eyes, only to find herself being deftly levitated to Rarity’s lap. The unicorn set her down and wrapped her forelegs around Dash.
“There, there, you’re fine now.” She shot an annoyed look at Applejack. “Really now, you said yourself she’d gotten hurt on this contraption. Why would you help her do that again?”
Applejack shrugged and took a sip of her drink. “Don’t worry yer pretty little head over it, Rarity. Ya know Dash can take a hit.”
Rarity grumbled and clung tighter to the pegasus, glaring back to Applejack. “That’s hardly the point! I don’t pretend to understand everything you two do, but if she hurts herself while practicing a stunt, at least the experience will help her in the future! What possible point does this thing have other than to toss you from it at speeds high enough to break your tailbone?”
Dash squeaked from the tight grip Rarity had her in, not sure whether she was bothered by or was enjoying somepony being worried about her. She finally settled on the latter, since she didn’t mind it from ‘Shy. “Rares, it’s cool. It’s just a thing, you know? Sometimes it’s cool to do something kinda stupid, makes you feel alive!”
Rarity considered that, her eyes cast skyward as she brought up a particular vivid memory. “I see... Somewhat like propositioning two of your best friends over drinks, and making wild and passionate love with them, then agreeing to their suggestion of a more permanent arrangement?”
This caused sudden tension in the lithe form she was clutching, as Rainbow’s wings began to strain away from her sides. “Yeah, sometimes... you gotta take a risk, because it just makes it feel that much better when it pays off.” She squirmed around, planting a big kiss onto the waiting mouth. “Y-you were a good risk, Rares,” she said a little breathlessly as the kiss broke.
Rarity smiled brightly, planting a fond kiss on the other pony’s nose. “I see the way of it. Applejack, were you planning to go next?”
Applejack was fuming, watching the two making out without her there to join in. “Was planning on it, less you two wanna head back.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it now. Let’s see how long you last, outdo our Rainbow and there will be a reward waiting for you.” Rarity blew Applejack a kiss as the latter’s expression turned from jealousy to embarrassment.
“Yeah! Okay... um...” She looked down at the levers doubtfully. “Can one of you...” She had settled herself down in the saddle, gripping the sides of the device tightly in her legs as it began to move. A quick glance showed Applejack that the controls were lit in Rarity’s aura. “T-thanks!” she managed to say, before the powerful bucks of the machine took her breath away.
Applejack’s ride was a thing of beauty to watch. She rode the machine as if it was an extension of her body at first, those legs of hers proving far too strong to dislodge. However, as before, the frenzied motion of the machine proved too great for her, and she was flung off after a respectable twenty seconds.
As Rainbow had been before, Applejack was caught in Rarity’s aura, and floated gently back to her. Rarity, still levitating Applejack, caught up the farmer’s face in her hooves, kissing her passionately until both were left heaving and smiling. Rarity then gently let her come to rest on her own four hooves, getting up from her seat as she did so.
“I suppose that does look a little like fun,” Rarity said as she gently pushed Rainbow from her lap, the latter falling on her rump in surprise.
Applejack quickly protested. “Now, sug, I really think that’s a bad idea. I mean, me and Dashie are built for rough and tumble stuff—”
Rarity raised an eyebrow, and the farmer fell silent. “I believe we just had this discussion, yes? Don’t you think I would enjoy that same thrill?”
Rainbow stood up and joined Applejack in her attempts to dissuade their marefriend. “Well, yeah, but who’s gonna catch you?”
“Oh, I don’t know. I rather thought one of my big strong girls could manage. It’s not as if you don’t have practice.” She smiled at each of them warmly, turning and walking up to the machine.
Applejack and Rainbow exchanged a worried look, then took up positions to either side of the machine, trying to ensure one of them would be within easy reach when she was thrown.
She climbed into the seat daintily, placing one hoof down at the pommel, and the other hanging loose at her side. Her legs clamped to either side of the saddle. She glanced down at the controls, and turned the machine on with her magic.
The first lurch nearly threw her off. Only the grip of her legs saved her. She’d forgotten how Applejack had been moving, and had attempted to merely hold herself upright. That was not going to work here.
The machine picked up speed, and Rarity allowed her body to move with the motions fluidly, keeping one hoof on the pommel, and the other hoof in the air to help her keep balance. The saddled rocked and swayed, and she with it. It whipped her around, she leaned with it to keep from falling. Seconds passed, but to Rarity it may as well have been an eternity. She rolled, she swayed. She let out a loud whoop and smiled as the faces of her marefriends spun around her in dizzying loops.
The saddle spun and bucked in a simultaneous motion, and her legs slipped from the slickness of her own sweat. She sailed through the air, eyes closed. She trusted implicitly that she would be caught, and her trust was rewarded by a set of strong hooves enveloping her. Looking up, she saw a smiling orange face looking back down at her.
“Hoooey! That was some ride, missy.” Applejack reached up to the brim of her hat, lifting it from her head and placing it on Rarity’s own. “You earned this for a bit. How ya feeling?”
“L-like I just had a nice romp with you two, only slightly less sore,” Rarity gasped out, laughing gently. “That was rather fun, I must admit.”
Rainbow had rushed over from her side of the room, grinning from ear to ear. “How the heck did you do that? That was at least thirty seconds! I’ve only seen A.J. do better than that...”
Rarity smiled dreamily as the world spun around her. “Please, as if that thing has anything on either of you when you arrive... Now... if you wouldn’t mind, perhaps we could go home and have a bit more fun?
Looks were exchanged, grins were shared, and Applejack carried Rarity home while Rainbow settled the bill.
