Tickleberg

by Carrotstew

Tickleberg

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Once upon a time. There was a pony. The ponys name was Tickleberg. Tickleberg was not like any other pony. He was important because, he was the only unicorn in Equestria that had ever tickled a dragon. Tickling a dragon was no easy feat, and Tickleberg was said to be trained by the best tickler himself, the pro tickler, Hellmouth. And now he was on a quest for Hellmouth to find the most hardcore porn in all of Equestria, that was said to be inside Fluttershys shed.

Not many have been in that shed, the last pony to ever visit the shed was Rainbow Dash. But the fate that befell her proved that the porn needed to be found and destroyed. But Hellmouth didn't want to destroy the porn, Hellmouth wanted to take it himself for his personal porn gallery in his grand museum of porn. So off Tickleberg went on his epic quest.

On his way he met the Pegasus Daring Do. Daring Doo was an ex-porn actress, and knew where the shed was located. But before she would show the way Tickleberg had to do her a service, he had to find the powerful diamond turd of Shangri La. The powerful diamond turd of Shangri La was said to be located in Zecoras basement in the Everfree forest. But when Tickleberg reached Zecora's hut he found her mixing a potion for a sick ostrich.

Tickleberg couldn't help but notice the bottles on the shelf labeled "corrupted." So Tickleberg decided to rid the world of this evil by drinking the potion which casued him to grow a manly mustache of manliness. The one who wear this legendary mustache gains the power to summon The powerful diamond turd of Shangri La. And so he did, but when he returned to Daring Do, Daring Do said that the diamond turd would come in handy when she had done the day long ritual to activate its powers. After the ritual, the diamond turd started glowing in many different colors. Suddenly a beam of intense energy started to focus in front of Daring Doo, and where the beam was focused a portal was opened to Fluttershy's night club, where the key to the shed was hidden.

Daring Doo hesitated, but decided that walking through the portal was worth the risk, but to be sure she pushed Tickleberg into the portal first to test it. Tickleberg pulled her in as well, because he was afraid to go alone. So they both stood by the entrance of Fluttershy's nightclub, looking nervously at each other. Suddenly Daring Doo's wings sprung up as a beautiful pony opened the door. The beautiful pony was the great Fancypants himself. Fancypants couldn't help but notice Daring Doo's wingboner, but he was a classy pony so he just pretended not to notice and invited her and Tickleberg inside to get a few drinks, of course this would give Daring and Tickleberg more than enough time to look for clues.

They have not yet forgotten that they're mission is to locate the key for the shed. They devised a plan where Tickleberg would talk with Fancypants, while Daring would look for the key. Daring Do walked around inside the nightclub, avoiding getting into any sticky situation, when suddenly Fleur de Lis crossed her path with the key tied around her neck. Daring reached out to grab the key, but stumbled and fell on the floor, right in front of her. Fleur then tripped over Daring falling right on top of her hitting her head on the floor knocking herself unconscious. Daring grabbed the key and ran towards the exit.
Daring had secured the key, but on her way towards the exit she noticed that Tickleberg had disappeared.
"You think I don't know what you are after, Tickleberg!" Fancypants said evilly.
He then told Daring that Tickleberg was waiting outside and wished her good luck. Daring met Tickleberg outside, but to her surprise he had a rather strange look on his face, as if he had seen a ghost. Tickleberg explained that Fancypants had done the evil deed of showing him but a fraction of the tapes he sought.
"I can never be clean" Tickleberg said.
in order to cheer him up Daring gave him a rather sensual hug and proceeded to tell him that she had actually starred as the lead role in those films. They then started the long walk to Fluttershy's shed, on the way they met Pinkie Pie taking a stroll through the woods, a fine sight for sore eyes Tickleberg thought. Pinkie Pie gave them a wide smile and after they explained what had happened she offered her Twitchy powers to aid them on their journey.

They then proceeded moving through the streets of Ponyville, but suddenly in the middle of the street stood the great and powerful Trixie! Pinkie Pie told Daring and Tickleberg that she was nothing but trouble, but Tickleberg saw potential in the powerful pony. He knew that his talents of tickling could melt the arrogant exterior of Trixie and with the help of Pinkie the element of laughter they could cast a powerful spell to make her laugh like a retarded seal. And so they did. Without giving Trixie a chance to defend herself they assaulted her and as she giggled away all of her arrogance she rose up with Daring Do's wings as a new pony.

But, suddenly out of the shadows came Zecora, the zebra was furious when she found out that Tickleberg had broken into her house. She had glowing green eyes and was mumbling a spell under her breath. The spell started making the four ponies weak and helpless, except the Great and Powerful Trixie who was immune against helplessness. Trixie just managed to dispel Zecora's spell when a shadowy figure came up behind her and said "Oh hi Trixie!" it was BigMac, he looked at them and gave them a friendly smile. He looked towards Zecora in anger as he understood what she had done to the 4 ponies. Zecora saw that she was outmatched now that they were all alert and ready to fight her back so she decided to join them instead, they were now six heroes.

Zecora was pleased with joining them, expecting a completely different outcome. And so they continued down the dark path leading to Fluttershy's shed. Judging from the sounds Fluttershy was in here cottage, which meant that the shed was probably unguarded. Daring sneaked towards the shed, leaving the rest by the forest, keeping them safe from any potential danger. As she neared the shed she saw a white bunny in front of it. She recognized the bunny as Angel and knocked him unconscious with a big rock. Pinkie ran towards the unconscious bunny, noticing a secret message behind his playboy tie that he wore around his neck. The secret message was 4 numbers "1337",

"perhaps there is a padlock on the shed" Daring thought.

She looked at the door there was no padlock on the door only a door handle without a lock. The message could mean many things, but it was definitely not the key to opening the shed. Daring Doo looked back on her friends, perhaps one of them could force the door open, Big Mac looked like the right pony for the job, he walked over to Daring and forced himself through the door. Daring couldn't help but become amused by the incredible power of the big stallion.
This was it, she had sought the porn to destroy it for her sake, but Tickleberg had his own mission, she approached him, but Tickleberg pushed her aside and grabbed the porn. Before he could do anything else Fluttershy came and was shocked to see the new Mane6 in her shed.
"I had hoped I could keep this vileness safe from the prying eyes of others, but I see that it must be destroyed, but I could not destroy it alone..." she told them

While the others were discussing how to destroy the porn, Tickleberg grabbed the porn and ran away.
"You traitor!" Daring screamed as the blue stallion ran back into the forest. She was devastated.
"AAAAYYYYYYEEEEEAAAA" the charging scream of Pinkie Pie was heard from the forest followed by a heavy thud. The thud was nothing else than Tickleberg tripping over the unconscious Angel. Tickleberg was laying defenseless in the woods as Daring ran and jumped on him. Teary eyed her gaze locked with his and Tickleberg felt the tears drip into his own eyes when Hellmouth appeared out of nowhere.
Hellmouth came out of the forest and had a disappointing look on his face when he discovered that his minion was on the verge of failing his quest. However it was then when he saw her... the lead actress of the very films he sought so hard...Trixie, he had never imagined that Tickleberg would run into her. Big Mac, Zecora and Pinkie didn't believe what they saw when Hellmouth stepped towards Trixie.
"I no longer need the films" he declared "I have something far greater. I have the leaked third season of MLP on blu ray."
Hellmouth floated back into the forest leaving the Great and Powerful Trixie in Shock. She fainted infront of Big Mac. "Eeyup" Big Mac declared picking her up on his back before stomping the porn with his mighty hooves. While Big Mac carried Trixie to her home so that she could get some rest, Pinkie Pie set all the porn magazines on fire.
"Meanwhile Tickleberg and Daring was still laying in the woods. They both had different goals for the journey, but maybe what they sought was not the porn.. but Love. Zecora sighed and looked at all the happy ponies when Pinkie Pie came to her side "Hey, whatcha sighing for, let's have a PARTY!" and so it was that they all held a great party and lived happily for many days after, The End.