A Kinda Sorta Adventure

Chapters

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3

Chapter 1

“Ok, one more second,” Rainbow Dash peered over the hedge, “She’s coming, pull it, Pinkie!”

From the tug of a simple rope, a bucket filled with honey was disturbed. It fell from its stand onto the unsuspecting unicorn. “Aargh!” she growled, “Pinkie, Rainbow! You two get over here and help me!” The now sticky unicorn mare heard snickering and two ponies running. Waiting for the two pranksters to get some distance, the unicorn mare gave a small, wry, smile. “Do you know where they could be heading now?” she asked, “I wouldn’t want my mane to have been sacrificed for nothing.”

“That was great Rarity; they should be heading back to Sugarcube Corner now.”

Rarity smiled, brushing a small glob of honey out of her mane, she said, “Aww good, if you need me, I’ll be at the spa.” With that, she grabbed a towel and proceeded to wipe off some excess honey before heading towards the spa.

Hidden away, a voice chuckled, “Phase one, complete.”
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“And then Rarity was all like “Aaaarghh,” Pinkie giggled, “did you see that Dashie!”

“Yeah I did Pinkie, we just did that, I filled that bucket this morning."

Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash were happy that their latest prank ended in victory. After retreating from Rarity’s rage, the pair decided to make their escape to Sugarcube Corner for some cupcakes and planning.

“I know we just did it, but it was so funny that we should always remember it.” Pinkie Pie’s smile reached from ear to ear. She bounced high into the air, leaving ponies awestruck at her blatant disregard for physics, gravity, and the balance of nature.

The pair continued to laugh and joke until they entered Sugarcube Corner, where they met a trio of small fillies in matching capes.

"How much sugar do we need? I can’t hold much more." Sweetie Belle trembled under the weight of several bags of sugar. The other two Cutie Mark Crusaders were bartering with the Cakes.

"Just a little bit more," Scootaloo answered, "We need more for those ponies, they said to get as much as we can get." She turned back towards the Cakes and continued to barter.

Pinkie snuck into the kitchen to swipe a few cupcakes, leaving Rainbow Dash with the Crusaders. She sat down at a table and waited; her fan would notice her soon.

Pinkie returned and placed a few cupcakes on the table, before grabbing two and stuffing them into her mouth. Mouth full of cupcake, Pinkie said, “Wegh neeeh a goo srank,” she chewed a few times before swallowing, “Honey is good and all, I mean really, really good and all, but Rarity already had one Sweetie in her life.”

Rainbow Dash grabbed a single cupcake and bit down in a messy but less impolite manner. Pausing to swallow the cupcake in her mouth, she pointed towards the Crusaders and smirked. “We haven’t done anything with those three; it could just be something simple.”

Pinkie gasped and tore out of the room, rushing for the door. Leaving a befuddled Rainbow to get noticed by the now sugar laden Cutie Mark Crusaders. Sweetie Belle and Applebloom both smiled and twirled their hooves in Rainbow’s direction. In unison both Crusaders called, “Oh Scoootaaaloooo.”

Scootaloo turned around with a bag of sugar in her mouth, which was promptly forgotten as she saw her idol sitting quietly just behind her. Scootaloo rushed over to Rainbow’s table, barely touching the floor as she hopped towards her idol.

“Rainbow Dash, Hi! What are you doing here?” Scootaloo continued to hop up and down, waiting for a response.

Rainbow chuckled and pushed three cupcakes over to the three fillies, she smiled and said, “Cupcakes and chilling out, Do you three want some?”

Three blurs reached out and swiped the cupcakes. Once the smoke cleared three smiling fillies were stuffing their faces with delicious pastries. “These are great!” They cheered in unison. They ravenously scarfed down their sweets, leaving only happy smiles on their faces.

They thanked Rainbow and pulled Scootaloo back towards the abandoned sugar bags, until Applebloom starts to pant and gasp. She pushed off her sugar bag and retreated towards the bakery’s bathroom. Scootaloo and Sweetie exchanged quizzical looks before mimicking their friend’s action.

Rainbow doubled over on laughter, reaching out from behind her back she produced a bottle and placed it on the table. Pinkie bounced back in with saddlebags full of rubber chickens and dictionaries. She examined the scene and frowned, “Aww, you didn’t even let me help,” she looked at the bottle that Rainbow placed on the table and gasped, “Rainbow, did you use…”

Rainbow raised a hoof to stop Pinkie, Quickly wiping a tear from her eye she said, “Just a drop, doesn’t burn after a drink,” She leaned back in her chair, “I did all the time in flight camp, it was all in good fun.”

Pinkie seemed satisfied and nodded, pausing to grab the bottle and place it inside her saddlebags. Grabbing on more cupcake, she pulled Rainbow out of the bakery, leaving only traces of their most recent prank. The Cutie Mark Crusaders pushed the restroom door open and searched for the two mares. Finding nothing left in the bakery, they gave a collective sigh and wiped sweat off their foreheads. They stumbled across the forgotten sugar bags, finding nothing more to gather from Sugarcube Corner, they placed the bags on their backs and walked out the door.

“Now, those ponies should be round here somewhere,” Applebloom said,” Scootaloo, how many bits did they say we can keep?”

Scootaloo pulled out a few shiny bits and placed them on the ground, “one…two…three, six bits left, two for each of us,” She pushed two bits to each of her friends and smiled, “Not too shabby, for what we had to do. Hay, the payment could’ve been seeing Rainbow Dash for all I cared.”

“If that was all you wanted, we would’ve gotten you enough bits for just the sugar,”
The three fillies searched for the mysterious voice, but they couldn’t find anypony.

“Nah, were good with these bits thanks,” Applebloom said, “Come on out and get your sugar, what’s it for anyway?”

Applebloom tried to push off the bags off her back, but they were enveloped by an aura of magic and pulled all in random directions.

The voice chuckled,” Sorry girls, can’t have you finding us before anypony else does, but the sugar is for a little party im planning. You girls can go, thanks for the help.”

“A party,” Scootaloo asked,” Who is it for?” She motioned to where a few bags of sugar used to be, “And why did we need get you sugar?”

“Oh, well the party is for a few special ponies,” she paused for a few moments, causing the already impatient Scootaloo to tap her hoof against the ground, “And all that sugar is for a BIG surprise, you fillies can come if you want.”

“I don’t know,” Sweetie said, “Where is the party at?” She worried what Rarity would say if she said she would be at a party that she didn’t even know the location to.

A small map floated towards the fillies, “This is the location of where the party is being held. We believe it’s called Sweet Apple Acres.”

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“Oh this is gonna be so fun Dashie!” Pinkie whispered in excitement, “Did you need to use all the pocket dictionaries though?”

“Yeah yeah, the more we have the funnier this’ll be,” she turned towards her friend and smiled, “I mean, it’s not like most of those dictionaries were Twilight’s or something.”

“Ugh, yeah, not all twilights,” Pinkie laughed nervously,” It’s not like I borrowed them, and promised to return them soon.”

“SSHHH, they’re coming,” Rainbow whispered, peering out from behind their hiding place, “Are the spring loaded traps ready?”

“Yep! I mean what kind of pony would I be if I didn’t set the traps? I mean it wouldn’t mean im a bad pony, but I wouldn’t be a good pony if I didn’t have a good prank every now and again.”

“Pinkie, pull it!” Rainbow cut off her friends chatter. Pinkie nodded quickly and pulled on the rope, launching rubber chickens high into the air. As they soared overhead they began to release their payloads. Soft, paperback dictionaries fell from the sky, landing on a light green and orange maned colt. He cowered against the onslaught, while the dictionaries landed harmlessly on top of him.

“Trixie!” the young colt shouted, “Please help me!”

The young colt’s friend, Snails, stared blankly at his friend for a few moments. He watched his friend cower as the last of the books fell, landing squarely on his head. “Uggghhhhh, Snips, those were just books, and you have one on stuck on your horn.”

Snips took his hooves off his eyes and looked up; no more demonic shapes were coming for him. He stood up and looked around; he was standing in the middle of a book battlefield. He pulled off the dictionary stuck onto his horn. He turned towards his friends and smiled sheepishly. “Sorry,” he said, “I was having another Ursa flashback.”
His friend smiled and patted his friend’s back. “It’s alright… I still have those.”

Snips eyes brightened, “You do? I thought I was the only one.”

“Nahhh, you just got scared is all,”

Snips returned his smile and looked at his fetlock, “Oh gosh, we have to get you to that party,” He began pushing Snails,
“Twist is gonna be there, and you want to have a good date, you gotta be there early.”

Snail’s blank expression changed into a deep scarlet blush, He chuckled as Snips pushed him away, Leaving Pinkie and Rainbow to smile and watch the Snips drag a smiling Snails by his tail.

“Awwwww,” Pinkie sighed,” Isn’t that just the cutest thing Dashie?” she pulled Rainbow into a hug and sighed, “I remember my first crush, he was so sweet and such a good listener, it was a shame he had to leave,”
Rainbow forced herself out of the choking hug Pinkie was giving her, “Wait, you’ve had a coltfriend before? I always thought you were dating sugar.”

Pinkie smiled and winked at Rainbow,” I never had a coltfriend, and I was dating sugar, but then he started making me sick,” she sighed softly, “We agreed to just be friends after last time.”

Rolling her eyes, Rainbow said “Friends, right.” She picked up one of the small dictionaries and glanced at it, “Uggghhhhh, never enough Daring Doo.”

Pinkie pulled herself from her remembrance and smiled, “And what about you Rainbow? Have you ever dated anyone?”
Rainbow groaned, seemingly annoyed at the question, “Why would I ever need a colt or mare to date, Im saving myself for the wonderbolts,” she pulled Pinkie close to her, “And no pony else.”

“Aww really Dashie, it’s not fun when you don’t have someone to hug and share laughs with.”
Rainbow shrugged and dropped the dictionary on the ground, “I’ve never really needed one, why start now?”

“Oh well, what should we do now, we got a lot of ponies today,” Pinkie smiled and bounced up and down, “You know what this calls for?”

“A party?” Rainbow said, smirking.

“PARTY!” Pinkie cheered, throwing confetti into the air,” And those two colts will lead us to a possibly super splendiferous party!” Pinkie grabbed Rainbow Dash and dragged her by her tail, “Come on, we don’t want to get there too late, they might run out of sweets, and I was hoping to say Hi to him.”

“So what you’re saying is you want to go to a party to go talk to the food?” Rainbow asked, hoping that wasn’t what her friend wanted to do.

Pinkie nodded, causing Rainbow Dash to sigh and put a hoof over her face. “Fine,” Rainbow said,” Just save me one of those cupcakes, sugar and I could get reacquainted again.”
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By the time they arrived they realized Snips and Snails led them to Sweet Apple Acres. The party was in full swing, ponies danced and chatted, leaving the pair unnoticed as they walked in. Pinkie rushed past several dancing ponies in search of a snack table. Rainbow flew into the air, searching for her friends. She couldn’t find any of them, not even Applejack. She sighed and landed in the midst of the party.

Pinkie pushed past a couple of dancing mares and shoved a cupcake into Rainbow’s hooves, “Sugar, you remember rainbow,” She laughed,” She couldn’t visit you in a while because….”

Rainbow paused for a moment, trying to interpret her pink friend’s statement. “Oh,” she realized, “I needed to not see you so much, can’t have too much of you.”

Pinkie laughed and pulled Rainbow deeper into the crowd, “Come on, I think I saw Twilight around her.”
It was true. Twilight sat on a lone bale of hay with her nose buried in a book. She looked up and saw Pinkie pulling Rainbow towards her. She closed the book and said, “Hey girls, great party isn’t it? I didn’t think you girls would be here.”
Pinkie gasped, “And miss this party?” She threw her hooves into the air, “Twilight, I thought you knew me better.”
Smiling softly at her friend’s antics, Twilight said, “Good point,” She rested a hoof on her head and sighed,” Oh yeah, somepony wanted to see both of you.”

“OOOOOH, somepony wants to see us Dashie,” Pinkie cheered, “Isn’t this exciting Dashie, Oh I’m SO excited.” Pinkie’s cheering caused many ponies to stare at the pair. Rainbow facehoofed and pulled Pinkie in the direction Twilight was pointing.

Rainbow pulled the pink mass of excitement behind her for several moments, she searched for any pony, but she was alone with apple trees and Pinkie. She spit out Pinkie’s tail and looked around one last time before saying, “Didn’t Twilight say there was somepony here?”

Pinkie smiled at Rainbow and said, “Twilight said a lot of ponies were a lot of places, she never said where the one would be exactly.” She rushed behind a tree and called, “Ooh Hello, mysterious pony?”
Pinkie pushed aside bushes, she climbed inside trees, she pulled up rocks, but wasn’t able to find a single sign of anypony nearby. The area was peaceful, calming in fact. Were it not for the fact that they were looking for somepony, Pinkie would throw a peaceful party here. She remembered that last time she had a peaceful party; those poor, poor stallions. “Oh well!” She thought; their wedding was great!

“Oh hello girls, we were expecting you to get her,” the voice resonated through the orchard; both Pinkie and Rainbow could not perceive where the voice was coming from. They both gave each other confused looks as the voice continued, “We were hoping we could find you at an earlier point, but we couldn’t get you alone,” They heard a faint hissing and gossamer wisps of purplish gas started flowing into the orchard. “Like we have now…”

Rainbow struggled against the gas; she didn’t know what it would do. But she needed to be alert, what if was a poison joke gas? She wouldn’t be able to fly very well, she’d be stuck not being able to do what she loved. She held her breath; she couldn’t breathe in the gas if she didn’t breathe. She looked for a way out of the gas but found none. She put a hoof to her mouth and yawned, a deep yawn that resonated, causing her to breathe in. Her eyes opened in terror. “Oh no,” She thought,” What’s it going to do to me?” She struggled for a few more moments, attempting to stave off whatever affects the gas held over her. She slowly collapsed on the ground, unconscious.

Pinkie enjoyed this, whatever this was. She laughed when the voice started talking, even when it started sounding like a meanie. She laughed when the gas started. Breathing in enough of it to make her a little dizzy, she laughed at the feeling it gave her. “This is fun!” she thought, “I should do whatever this is again!” she yawned and curled into a ball, “Right after this nap.”

The gas dissipated quickly, a few figures trotted up and gathered the now unconscious mares. They all smiled and looked at their leader. The leader, for their part, stood tall, pulled out a checklist. “Phase two, compete.” they all quickly studied the checklist before grabbing the mares and their things. Their leader smiled and said,” If we hurry up here, we can move phase three to thirty minutes earlier.”
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(something something something) Credit: Mlp:Fim to Hasbro and Lauren Faust, and the element of pancakes/editing: Catface

Chapter 2

The Second Chapter; Wherein Things Happen

“….And so I said, I kinda like oatmeal, it’s such a good snack after a party!” Pinkie said with a giggle, “But seriously now,“ She poked the unconscious Rainbow in the wing, “You gotta get up Dashie.”

Rainbow stirred a little, Pinkie’s poke brought her back into the threshold of consciousness. She brought a hoof to her head, well, she at least tried to. Ropes were tied around her wings and legs. She panicked; struggling against the ropes she bashed her head against Pinkie’s arm.

“Owie!” Pinkie rubbed a hoof against her back, “Dashie, be more careful, you could hurt somepony.”

“Pinkie!” Rainbow shouted, “This is serious, were tied up, lost, and we were kidnapped by mysterious ponies!” She continued to struggle against the ropes.

Pinkie rubbed a hoof against her chin, “But Dashie,” she said, “You’re the only one that’s tied up, those ponies made the funniest gas, and there is always time to laugh.” She pulled the still struggling Rainbow up and untied the rope. She spit out the rope and added, “You’re so serious sometimes Dashie,”

Rainbow stared at Pinkie in disbelief, “You weren’t tied up?” She pulled Pinkie close to her face, she shouted at her in anger, “Why did you not untie me, or for that matter, why didn’t you wake me up sooner?!”

Pinkie shrunk back against Rainbow’s anger, “I thought that you think it would've been kinda funny, and I was talking to you all that time.” She sniffled and pulled Rainbow into a hug, “IM SORRY DASHIE!”

Rainbow Dash groaned and pulled Pinkie out of the hug and sighed, “It’s alright Pinks, were just lost,” she flapped her wings and hovered into the air, she scanned the area, sighed, and landed. “I don’t even know where we are, we could be in the Whitetail Woods or the Everfree, I just can’t tell.”

Pinkie put her hoof on Rainbow’s shoulder and softly said, “We won’t know if don’t start going, silly,” She walked towards a bush behind her and pulled out a cupcake, “And have this, we need all the energy we can get!”

Rainbow grabbed the cupcake, she eyed it before giving a cautious bite, and she felt the familiar taste of sugar and its soft texture, there was something more, a faint spice to it. She relished in the cupcake’s taste, with a few more tentative bites, she wiped her mouth and smiled, “That was actually pretty good, where’d you get it anyway?”

Pinkie smiled and pulled out a pair of saddlebags, she tossed one to Rainbow and said, “Whoever those ponies were, they forgot to take our saddlebags, mine still had some treats in mine with,” she reached into her bag and pulled out an empty bottle, “Oh, and this.” She tossed it to Rainbow.

Rainbow scanned the label and her eyes shot open, she dropped the bottle and ran. She gasped and panted; tearing open
her own saddlebags she pulled out a small canteen and poured into contents into her mouth. She lay back on the ground and sighed, “Woooooh,” She turned to her friend, who was now doubled over in laughter, “Pinkie, why’d you keep the rainbow juice?”

Pinkie pulled herself up from her revelry and said, “That,” she giggled and continued, “Don’t you feel better, we always had the most fun after pranks.” Rainbow stared at Pinkie in annoyance before smiling and laughing. “Now enough goofing around, It’s time for seriousness!” with that, she grabbed her saddlebags on her back and hopped in a random direction, Rainbow hurriedly tossed her empty canteen back into her bag and chased after her friend, smiling all the way
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“...And so I woke up and saw I was tied up just like you, but since I was awake I just slipped out of the ropes and waited for you!” Pinkie finished her story and pulled out another, thankfully untainted, cupcakes and swallows it whole. Rainbow flew down from the branch she was resting on and pulled out a muffin, now fearful of the cupcakes.
Between bites, Rainbow said, “Well were her now, I can’t really carry you so far out of this forest.”

Pinkie gasped and stared at Rainbow in disbelief. “Did you just call me fat, Dashie?” Pinkie threw herself against the ground and sobbed.

Rainbow rushed towards Pinkie to try and calm her down, “N-N-No-o!” she stammered, “You one of the best friends I’ve ever have, it’s just that we don’t know where we are and I could fly us into an even worse problem.”

Pinkie stared up at Rainbow; she tossed her head between her hooves and continued to wail, “YOURE JUST SAYING THAT!”

Rainbow lightly shook her friend, trying to calm her, “No I mean it, and you are a great pony, you always care about everypony, and you look beautiful no matter what you do.”

Rainbow continued to lightly shake Pinkie and come up with more things, hoping vainly to cheer up her friend. Pinkie turned towards Rainbow and asked, “You really all mean that Dashie?” Rainbow nodded as furiously as she could. Pinkie cracked a huge smile, she pulled rainbow into a deep hug, “Good!” she cheered, “Cause I got ya again!” Pinkie released her hug and fell to the floor, holding her sides in laughter.

Rainbow sat in disbelief. She couldn’t believe it; Pinkie Pie got her again, “clever pony.” She thought. “Well I guess we better get back to walking,” she picked up her saddlebags and leaped into the air, she flew over Pinkie and taunted, “Come on Rarity, We wouldn’t want your mane to get all messy.”

Pinkie ran a hoof through her mane, she up her head in a regal manner and said, “I say, Rainbow Dash, do stop all that
tomfoolery and wait for a lady, will you.” She giggled and chased after Rainbow. Their laughter rang through the forest as the two friends looked for a way to freedom
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“To update on our little ponies, they are moving towards the next point, they will be intercepted by one of you, all we need is one of you to do is go find them and force them further towards the point, anyone?”

“Well I imagine that we would need someone with a bit more ability for creating fear.”

“We would be most appreciative if you all would allow us to assist her; we can get them to the next point.”

“Oh you would, are you sure that you want to do this to? You’re needed for the next phase in the plan anyway.”

“It would be useful for us to proceed from here, as we would need to be nearby them for the next phase of the plan anyway.”

“Alright, if you’re up to it. We’ve all got our assignments, let’s proceed to phase four.”
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“So wait a second Pinkie, you have a whole bunch of pranking supplies in your bags?” Rainbow Dash rummaged through Pinkie’s bag, while the smiling pink pony stuffed another muffin into her mouth.

Pinkie swallowed her treat, with a sigh of contentment she said,” Yep!” she opened her saddlebags and started pulling out prank supplies, “We got rubber chickens, a few more dictionaries, some of those re-igniting candles, a few cushions of various uses, and my crowning achievement, The Pinkie Pie-apult.”

Rainbow Dash watched as Pinkie pulled out her pride and joy of pranking, “So wait, you’re telling me it shoot-“

“Yep!” she quickly stuffed the Pinkie Pie-apult back into her saddlebags, “But don’t tell anypony, not even the readers.” Rainbow watched her stare off into a random direction, “I know you people really want to know what it does, but that’s a surprise!”

Rainbow quickly applied her hoof to her face, realizing that Pinkie was just being random again, she groaned and said, “Let’s get going, I want to get outta here by sundown.”

“Okie Dokie Lokie!” Pinkie chirped. They quickly packed up and set off again, Rainbow looking for any signs of an exit from above the forest. Pinkie bounced merrily after her.

“So Dashie, what are we looking for again?”

“Don’t you remember? We’re looking for anything that could tell us where we are.”

“Oh you mean like that scale over there?”

“What, a scale?” Rainbow landed and looked around, trying to find what her friend was pointing out. “I don’t see a scale.”

“There,” Pinkie pointed to a single purple scale lodged into the dirt, “That’s the one Rarity ripped off Steven Magnet.”

“Who’s Steven Magnet?” Rainbow asked, “That giant sea monster with the bad mustache?”

Pinkie gasped, “That’s not very nice Dashie; and Steven worked so hard to get that mustache just right.” Pinkie pulled the lone scale out of the ground and admired it’s still present luster. She pushed it into her bag. She turned to Rainbow and said, “Rarity will want that, you know memories.”

“Whatever Pinkie, so if we found the scale here, that old castle should be that way.”

“OH OH OH, I know!” Pinkie raised a hoof and bounced up and down, “We can go towards the castle and then backtrack to Ponyville!” She grabbed rainbow by the tail and started running, “Come on, it’s getting dark out, we want to get back to Ponyville so I can throw us a “We found our way back home party” it’ll be fun.”
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“Phase four complete, or would this be phase three and a half?”

“I think we have bigger problems than knowing what phase this is.”

“Oh right, you two stay here and make sure they proceed according to plan. We’ll all go back and prepare Ponyville for their arrival.”

Chapter 3

Chapter 3: The Chapter Based On Footwear

“Oh my gosh Dashie, this place is exactly as I remember it.” Pinkie rushed over the heavily swaying bridge, “I can’t believe this whole place stood for so long, it feels like decades since we came here and saved the princess from Queen Meanie.”

They pushed open the heavy stone door; they stared in awe of the massive castle now in the light of day. The overgrowth seemed less menacing, the windows broken as they were, less terrifying. They moved deeper into the castle, memories of their newfound friendship flooding back to them.

“I remember this; this is where we defeated Nightmare Moon.” Rainbow said as she pushed past Pinkie. She smiled proudly while Pinkie bounced beside her.

“Yeah, and we got to see Princess Celestia and see Princess Luna for the first time in a thousand years!”

Rainbow shuddered and rubbed a foreleg against her flank, she said, “Yeah and then she showed up for that one Nightmare Night, let’s just say she became kinda a pain in my flank.”

“What she do?” Pinkie asked, “Did she try to bite you like she did to Pip? Or did she make one of those spiders climb up on top of you?”

“It was more like she reversed a prank on me.”

“Oh, now I get it,” with that, Pinkie held a hoof over her mouth to stifle her laughter, “Oh she got you good Dashie.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Rainbow pouted, “At least I wasn’t a chicken whenever I saw her.”

“Oh Dashie, you know that was just a costume,” Pinkie pulled Rainbow past the grand hall and into one of the corridors of the castle, “Come on, while were here we can explore, maybe we can find Luna’s sock drawer.”

They walked through the corridors, shadows blanketing the walls. They trekked through the corridors, Pinkie’s voice cutting through the dark. Anytime they would find a door leading to a new room, Pinkie would bounce in and leave Rainbow outside waiting for Pinkie to give her the verdict of the room. She would leave the room and saying something like, “There were so much flour in there.” Or, “Can you believe Princess Celestia had a whole room full of statues?”

They wandered the halls, exploring and sharing funny comments and laughing at the ridiculousness of some of the rooms. Pinkie would occasionally take an item from one of the rooms, saying it was, “you never know when you could use something like this, Dashie.”

The sun was beginning to set before Rainbow Dash alerted Pinkie; Pinkie continued to urge Rainbow further. The largely unbroken panes of glass slowly dimmed the halls, leaving the two mares in the slowly fading light. Rainbow grew steadily more impatient with each minute that Pinkie urged her further. “Come on Pinkie,” she groaned, “It’s already too late to get back to Ponyville in time.”

“Come on Dashie,” Pinkie protested, “Socks! What could be better than finding Princess Luna’s lost sock treasure?”

“A lotta things are better than socks,” Rainbow said, “Ponies aren’t supposed to wear socks anyw-“

Pinkie jammed a hoof into her mouth before she could finish, “Shhhhhhhh,” Pinkie said, “Look.” Pinkie lifted a hoof towards the end of one of the many hallways; she pushed a protesting Rainbow towards the door. The door was small and unassuming; yet it was flanked by two stone statues. The statues stood tall in the waning light, there polished stone armor catching any light that it still could. It continued to do this all the way down to their... Socks.

“I have a feeling this could be the room were looking for.” Pinkie said. She examined the stone guard’s socks and said, “You can tell by the markings that these statues were meant to guard the sock treasury.” She reared up and pushed against the door, but the door remained unyielding against her push, “Dashie, come help me here.”

Rainbow groaned and trotted towards the door; she placed her hooves on Pinkie’s back and gave a hefty push. Combined with Pinkie’s force, the door gave way with a crack, causing both of them to tumble into the darkness that swallowed the room.

“Ugh,” Rainbow peeled herself off the floor; she pulled something off her wing and tried to look around the room. “Pinkie,” she called, “Where are you? It’s too dark in here.”

Light slowly filtered into the room; Rainbow searched for any sign of pink in the mounds of socks she saw. She moved to and fro, picking up any pink, magenta, even red sock she could find. She pulled up a pile of graying socks to find Pinkie; she was curled up in a cocoon of socks and tightly hugging a few rolls of tightly wrapped socks.

“Pinkie comes on,” Rainbow said, desperately shaking her friend, “This place gives me the creeps. I know it’s just socks but I still have a bad feeling about this place”

“Just one more cupcake momma...” Pinkie yawned and sat up, “Oh hi Rainbow Dash, what’s going on?” Pinkie looked around the room and gasped, “Are we in Princess Luna’s secre-“

“Princess Luna’s secret sock storage, yes!” Rainbow hissed. She grabbed Pinkie’s tail and rushed for door. Pinkie broke out of her sleepy daze and excitedly looked around the room, taking in all the glory that footwear could yield.

“Isn’t this exciting, Dashie? Are you excited? Because im so excited to be here!” Pinkie pulled her tail out of Rainbow’s grasp and bounced toward a random pile of socks. She gave a great leap before landing with a soft woomph. “All these socks and so much we could do with them.” She cheered. She wadded up a few socks and presented it to Rainbow; Rainbow picked up the sock ball and looked at Pinkie expectantly. “SOCK FIGHT!” Pinkie cheered, disappearing into one of the many sock drawers.

Rainbow stood in the middle of the room, dumbfounded. “Pinkie, we don’t have time for this.” She dropped the ball and looked into the drawer Pinkie disappeared into. The drawer contained nothing besides a note. Rainbow read the note and mumbled, “Behind you?”

“Well it’s more like to your left and behind but close enough.”

Rainbow turned towards the voice, only to be pelted with dozens of sock balls. She rushed behind a large pile of blue socks, and searched for her pink assailant. Pinkie bounced towards her, several tightly balled up socks in her mouth. Rainbow grabbed a large pile of the socks and tossed them at Pinkie. The force of the sockwave pushed Pinkie into a several large mounds of socks.

“I got you now Pinkie!” Rainbow cheered. She snickered and began flinging socks back at her friend, who returned volley after volley.
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“Those were OURS, who do those impudent whelps think they are?”

“Please, we agreed that no matter what happened we wouldn’t deviate from the plan.”

“That may be, but what wouldst thou say to beginning the final phase.”

“I’ll be ready for them then, remember to lead them towards then throne room.”
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Rainbow crawled slowly across the floor, cradling her artillery, “Got a little present for her.” she thought. The last volley the enemy returned broke the barricade, leaving Rainbow vulnerable to attack. Thinking quickly, Rainbow dove into a nearby trench. The sound of the barrage overhead, Rainbow gathered her resolve and made a break for freedom. Soft woomphs echoed around her as she dodged the volleys of socks. The enemy never saw her escape, so their trajectory continued to target the now destroyed mass of socks. She climbed towards the summit of the largest sock pile, her enemy sat poised in the middle of the no-man’s land. She readied her payload, sighted her enemy, and fired the first volley.

“SNEAK ATTACK!” she shouted, hurling sock-ball after sock ball at the pink menace. The enemy only figured out about the barrage once the first few shots hit the ground, she could only stare in shock and awe as she prepared to meet Celestia. The first shot landed on her eye, blinding her. She felt each consecutive shot against her body. Her cries were drowned out by the soft woomphs echoing through the air.

Rainbow ended her assault and waited, poised for a sneak attack. The enemy lay half buried in a pile of munitions, defeated. Rainbow glided towards her enemy, glowing in her now apparent victory. “General Pinkie!” she barked, “I am here to demand your unconditional surrender. Come quietly or face the wrath of the Great Dash Empire.”

General Pinkie raised her hoof towards her enemy; Rainbow grabbed it and pulled her back onto her feet. “Great acting Dashie,” Pinkie chirped, “I could really feel when you were ordering me around.” Pinkie slipped a sock onto her foreleg and held it out for her friend.

Rainbow tugged a sock onto her own leg shook hooves with Pinkie, “Truce.” She said, proud of her victory. Pinkie giggled and returned the truce.

“Very cute performance girls, but we believe it’s time for you little show to end.”

They turned towards the voice, trembling.

Nightmare Moon stood in the middle of the room; the lights in the room dimmed, accenting her terrifying form. A glow formed on her horn, lifting all the socks into the air. They soared around the room, quickly forming into a large ball above the terrible villain. “Im afraid you girls won’t be leaving this place anytime soon,” She declared triumphantly, “After all, I’ve never seen two little ponies dig their way out of several tons of footwear.”

Rainbow stood paralyzed, she stared in awe as the ball of socks descended. Her body was paralyzed as her sock tomb consumed her. Her body curled under the weight. She was trapped.

Pinkie bounded out of the way, leaving the sock tomb to consume Rainbow. She watched horrified as her friend was buried, leaving her to face Nightmare Moon alone. “I can’t abandon my friend,” she cried, she grabbed the Pinkie Pie-Launcher out of her saddlebags, “So I guess I have to break that promise to the bronies.” She flipped up a small switch and set the safety off, “Nightmare moon,” she shouted, breaking the mare’s reverie, “Say hello to my little best friend!”

Nightmare Moon stared dumbfounded at the pink pony, then she felt something slam against her body, she saw foam smeared across her body, she tasted a little of the cream and shuddered, banana cream.

Pinkie fired pie after pie at the wicked mare, covering her in pie tins. She backed up as the barrage continued, forcing her into a wall as she continued to be pelted with pie. “Have a taste of Explosive Apple!” Pinkie shouted, she flipped a switch on the side and continued her assault. She stepped forward and brought the launcher level with Nightmare Moon’s horn. The pie assaults splattered against her horn, leaving a pie tin speared over her horn. Pinkie stopped her barrage momentarily to get more pies. She hid behind a sock heap and watched as Nightmare shakily stood up; she gritted her teeth and growled. A fierce light blazed out of her horn, showering the room in magical light. She tried wiping off the cream now stuck to her coat, her horn slowly petered out. “Uh oh.” She said.

Pinkie stepped out of her hiding place, ready for action. She pulled the trigger and screamed as the pie flew out of her launcher. Nightmare Moon panicked, she ran for the door as pies soared around her. She reared back and pushed it open with a heavy buck. She rushed down the halls, dodging the errant pie that followed her. She pushed her way into the throne room; and with a great leap, she threw herself into the air and flapped her wings. Pinkie rushed out and continued to fire at the escaping Nightmare, Her shots were starting to hit less as the wicked mare got further away. Pinkie smiled and flipped one last switch on her launcher, a scope popped out of the top. She lined up one last shot, “Take this Queen Meanie!” she shouted. A high velocity pecan pie shot of the launcher with a loud boom; it soared through the air, striking Nightmare Moon in the rump. She tumbled through the air, landing in the outskirts of the forest.
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Several figures strode out towards the fallen nightmare; one raised a hoof to help her up.
“I trust that they are unharmed.” The figure said, raising a clipboard and checking off something. “We wouldn’t our friends to be hurt now.”

Nightmare Moon shakily raised herself to the figure’s eye level. She paused and pushed off the pie tin. With her magic free, she transformed. “They are unharmed. The pegasus is trapped in the sock tomb; the pink one should be digging her out by now.” With a wave of her horn, she pushed off a majority of the pie tins and cream.

“I must say Princess,” one of the figures said, “That cream can do horrid things to your coat; you must join me for a spa session.”

The princess smiled,” We would enjoy that very much, Miss Rarity.”
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Pinkie bounded towards the sock pile, frantically ripping sock after sock from it. She shouted for Rainbow Dash, when she heard no response she started tearing larger and larger chunks out. Her efforts seemed almost fruitless; she couldn’t pull out to many socks without it caving in. She sat there and sniffled, refusing to cry as she stared at the tomb of her friend.

She waited for what seemed like hours, hoping that her friend would be alright. Every small shift she saw brought joy to her heart, “Maybe Rainbow Dash is alright.” She thought. She gathered her resolve; she pushed her hoof into the soft wall of tomb. She called out for her friend, reaching and feeling for her friend. She felt soft feather in her hoof. She pushed piles and piles of socks out her way. She dug until she saw the multicolored mane; she grabbed the mane in a hug and pulled with all her might. Her friend slipped out her tomb, dazed but otherwise unharmed.

“Oh Dashie!” Pinkie cried, tears slowly falling, “I thought you were gonna be trapped under socks forever.” She hugged tighter and continued to sniffle.

“Pinkie,” Rainbow Dash wheezed, “You’re choking me.”

Pinkie released her tight grip on her friend and smiled apologetically. “Come on, let’s go home.”
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“Wow girls, all that really happened?”

“Yeah, Pinkie really saved me there. If it wasn’t for her I would have been trapped in there forever, that’s a long time you know.”

“I figured, so what happened after that? I mean, how was getting back to Ponyville in the middle of the night?”

“Well, when you train as hard as I do,” she said, flexing her foreleg, “It’s not so hard to get somewhere after being buried under tons of socks.”

“I must say darling, you could’ve been hurt from all the trauma, are you sure you’re alright.”
Pinkie returned, balancing a tray of cupcakes on her head. She placed the tray on the table and began gorging herself on the baked treats. “She’s all good now, right Dashie?” she chirped, mouth still full of cupcake, “She’s so great that were planning to have another great day of pranks.”

Rainbow cringed and said, “Actually Pinkie, we should do something else for a while. Pranks were fun and all, but that's all we ever do.” She put a hoof around Pinkie’s shoulder and continued, “Maybe we should try something else, like hoofball! You ever play that; it can get really intense?”

Pinkie frowned for a few moments before smiling and saying, “That’s alright Dashie,” She zipped past her friend, leaving a dumbfounded Rainbow to watch as Pinkie reappeared covered in sports equipment. “I gotta warn you though, I have a fantastic backswing.”

As they prepared to go play hoofball, Rainbow turned to her friend and said, “Make sure Princess Celestia gets that letter, she’s has to know that Nightmare Moon is free and has some evil ponies working with her.”

“Will do Rainbow, you two have fun now.” They watched as the two friends left, they shared a smile as their plan finally came to fruition. She turned to her companion and happily stated, “Well, hopefully that stops their little reigns of pranking terror, at least for a few days.”

“I must say dear, I didn’t actually think your plan would actually work.” Her companion replied,” What with the plot twists and confusing details, but I believe that we can finally have some peace and quiet from those two.”

“Those weren’t plot twists; they were strategic recoveries in the plan.”

“Whatever you say darling, I do believe that this is what we would call phase five?”

“Oh yes,” they raised their cupcakes in triumph. Before biting down into the delicious treat, she pulled out her clipboard as she smiled and said,” Phase five, and six, completed.”
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The ruler of the sun watched as her sister slowly trotted through the castle foyer, she saw her sister covered in bits of baked good. She trotted towards her sister and began to give her a customary welcome, “Welcome back Luna, did you have a goo-“

“Never mind that sister, did you know the Element of Laughter carries a pie launcher? She used it on me ruthlessly; I’ll be cleaning coconut and apple filling out of my mane for weeks to come.”

Princess Celestia patted her sisters back sympathetically. Wiping off a bit of apple filling, she smiled and said, “Well look at it this way Luna, you were always a pie loving kind of filly.”

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Credit: Mlp:Fim to Hasbro and Lauren Faust
Sorry about this chapter. When it comes to procrastination, I can be king. Well it’s done now and I plan to add more stories as soon as possible. Maybe even go into the deeper archives of my stories and pull out something for you all to enjoy.
-Thanks, jdl179