Wayne couldn't sleep. He could never sleep with people- err... horses, in this case- watching him. He hated being stared at. Being locking a in jail cell on another planet by rainbow horses was just the schizophrenic icing on the insane hallucination cake.

Wayne couldn't take it anymore. He rolled over and pushed himself up to his feet.

The guards- or at least the two smaller ones who were stupid enough to stay there with him- reacted by dropping their lunch... or dinner... or, whatever the hell meal it was time to eat, and raised their swords defensively.

Wayne just snorted a short laugh. He could almost smell the fear and anxiety on them. He walked up to the already-bent bars and gripped them.

The orange one shouted something at him in that stupid, frilly-sounding language.

He didn't know how or why, but whenever they spoke it sounded fancy. Maybe they were royalty. Or French.

He pulled the bars mightily, completely bending them out of shape... some more. He was able to push through them easily enough. Now he just had to worry about the guards. Not these two, but the ones who were actually dangerous.

The orange one yelled again; its voice cracked. It blushed faintly, looking angrily at him with all its tiny horse might. It was actually kind of cute. In that so-annoying-that-you-want-to-crush-its-head kind of way.

Wayne snorted again and started walking down the hallway. Wayne hadn't eaten in days, and he was starting to consider filleting one of these damned horses and making some steaks. But that probably wouldn't earn him any favors from the big blue one that tried to kill him. So instead of eating the populace of this insane plane of existence, he decided to look for a kitchen to raid.

At every corner, he stopped, looked down every possible way, and sniffed. His nose could find a biscuit in a barn. But after three or so turns, he heard the sound of running hooves getting closer, fast. Wayne rounded a corner and waited for his pursuers to show themselves. He peeked around the corner with half an eye, and then groaned. Those two idiots from his cell were chasing him down. Or at least trying to.

The white one whispered something to the orange one who responded with another whisper- though it sounded almost as loud as her yelling. The went on like this until they came upon the corner where Wayne was hiding.

As they got closer, he jumped out yelling as loud as he could. "RAWRAGGHHAR!!!"

They both screamed. Very loudly. And very high pitched.

The white on seemed to go even whiter than normal and clung to the orange one who was trying to scream and gasp for breath at the same time. They were so terrified that they dropped the swords that were in their mouths.

Wayne saw this, and he acted instantly. He picked up the swords, one in each hand. He drew his arms back, ready to kill. But he stopped short. Inches away from their heads, he stopped. He was looking into their eyes. But the way Wayne saw them in that moment was great wells of raw emotion. Fear. Anger. Terror. Sadness. Shock. All of these and so much more. He had never seen anything like it before.

The horses, seeing his hesitation, stopped screaming. They were staring him straight in the eye, blinking in confusion and hoping that he would spare them.

Wayne sighed and put the swords in his belt. "Stupid fuckin' horses," he berated them as he kept walking. He heard hooves behind him. Of course they couldn't just leave him alone. Of course they had to follow him. Of course they wouldn't shut up!

Without their swords, they were reduced to nothing but a minor annoyance, but still they persisted to try to bring Wayne back to his cell.

Wayne got to another corner, and he sniffed. There... There! He could smell it! He could smell his victory! Wayne started to jog towards the smell of food, his mouth slightly watering.

The two guards kept up with him easily, shouting the whole way.

Wayne came upon a door, barred and padlocked. He pushed on it, and it gave slightly. He pushed on it harder, and his hand went through the door.

The horses were yelling as loud as they could while he tore the small wooden door to pieces, trying to make him stop.

With the door off, and the way clear, Wayne quickly went inside the room. He found what he was looking for. Heaps of food everywhere. Carrots, apples, potatoes, grapes, lettuce, pears, and everything else in the world that revolved around fruits and vegetables. Wayne ripped apart a sack of plums first- they were his favorite. Eating a plum a second, he finished the sack quickly. He ate a pile of carrots, then started devouring all the apples he could find.

The two guard horses looked at him worriedly. They couldn't stop him from doing anything, but he wasn't doing anything bad. Well... besides eating half of the day guards' rations. Realizing this, the orange one picked up an apple and bit into it.

Wayne looked over to the horse, staring at it intensely.

The orange one blushed and looked away under his gaze.

There were a few seconds of silence before Wayne burst out laughing. That stupid horse was blushing! Wayne didn't know why, but he found that incredibly amusing. But that horse had already taken too much of his time.

Wayne walked over to a large refrigerator. Pulling it open, his eyes widened. There was a pie in there. Wayne hadn't eaten a pie in years. He picked it up like it was a holy relic. He half expected monks to start chanting somewhere. It was beautiful. Then, Wayne smashed his face into the entire thing and consumed it in less than a minute. When he was done, Wayne licked his lips and sighed happily.

A door opened on the other side of the room.

A large brown horse with darker brown hair walked through it, looked at Wayne, then bolted back out as fast as it could.

Wayne chuckled to himself.

There was another chuckle as well.

Wayne looked at the orange horse who was laughing lightly at the fear of the cook- Wayne assumed it was a cook by the apron it was wearing.

The orange horse looked at him and stopped laughing.

Wayne reached in to the refrigerator and pulled out two jumbo sized tubs of strawberry ice cream. He undid the lid of one, and offered the other one to the two horses watching him. Whether they took it or not, Wayne didn't know. He was too busy burying his head in pink, dairy goodness.

***

Luna had been reading texts about ancient races in the known world, and beyond. No mention of anything like that creature in any of her books about ancient Equestria. She could find nothing in her books about supernatural happenings either.

She closed her current book- Things That Are Unseen in the Everfree- and groaned in frustration. Nothing. She had found absolutely nothing. She looked out the window to see the rising sun. It was time for bed anyways; she could begin her search again tomorrow night.

As she made her way towards her bed, her chamber doors burst open, a group of her personal night guard panting hard in the wooden door frame.

"P- princess, i- it escaped!" one of the guards yelled, trying to catch his breath.

Luna could feel her blood go cold. It escaped? Then that means...

Luna snarled in rage. He had escaped. He had killed those young mares! They weren't even employed for a year yet, but he had murdered them like the beast that he is!

"Where is it?" she hissed in rage

"It was last seen in the mess hall kitchen," the guard said.

Luna lit up her horn, then she was gone.

There was a crackling pop, then she was standing at the doorway to the kitchen. What she saw... was not what she had expected. The two guards who she had thought were dead were actually very much alive. Alive... and throwing ice cream at the creature.

Said creature was taking cover behind a table and laughing maniacally, throw bunches of grapes at them from the safety of the table.

They advanced on him, and he then poured an entire sack of oranges over the table, causing them to slip and stumble. Even though they were unbalanced, they were still coming at him, the barrel of ice cream being carried between them.

He looked over the table at them, leaving himself open to attack.

And attack they did. They tilted the container over him and slammed it down in his head, trying to suffocate him with strawberry ice cream.

He howled in anger- and probably from the cold burn as well- from the attack and flailed his arms around to find them.

But they jumped out of his reach and laughed at his situation, giving each other a high hoof.

Luna cleared her throat.

The two guards looked at her and went pale. She had caught them fraternizing with a known criminal. That was punishable by life in the dungeons.

Luna walked past them, straight to the creature- who was supposed to be locked up. She stood in front of him, waiting for him to realize she was there.

He stopped flailing about for a second, then pulled the barrel-sized tub of ice cream off of his head. He saw her then.

Luna... almost laughed at his appearance. His beard and hair was stained a bright pink from the ice cream, with little chunks of strawberries sticking to him. Bits of other food were clinging to him in various spots. From head to hoof, he was filthy with splattered food. She did feel like laughing at him. But... Then she remembered why she was here. Why he was here. What he had done.

He looked at her for a long moment, all the while Luna was glaring at him. Then he held the huge tub of ice cream out to her. He said something in his own language. Two simple words.

She couldn't understand what the words were, but the meaning was clear.

"Want some?"

Author's Note

Yay, ice cream! Sorry that it's not a completely blood-soaked chapter, but I do actually want to incorporate some type of feelings for Wayne. And plus, I was in an ice creamy mood when I wrote this. But don't worry, there will be more blood in future chapters. This I swear!